Welcome to The Becoming Podcast, where we talk about modern-day rites of passage, radical transformation, and other times of becoming in women's lives...and how these times can be a catalyst to become more of who you are. Hosted by women's mentor, coach
Welcome back to another episode of The Becoming Podcast, all! I'm delighted to bring you my conversation with writer Cindy DiTiberio today. I've been following Cindy's work on her Substack, The Mother Lode, for quite a while now, and I know you're going to love our conversation. So many of my clients and the women I connect with are experiencing – or thinking about – the end of their intimate partnerships, and I think Cindy's wisdom will really resonate with you. This episode is especially for you if it's your transition into motherhood that has instigated a reckoning in your relationship. Here's some of what we talked about in our conversation: > How MDMA therapy helped Cindy know that she needed to leave her marriage. > What so often happens to relationships when a couple has a baby. We talk about everything from sex to paternity leave to caregiving and the mental load. > The feeling of being trapped by oppressive systems of capitalism and patriarchy and how heterosexual couples often end up in traditional, gendered roles without ever intending to. We talk about the role of internalized patriarchy, the devaluing of women's time, and how both Cindy and I (and so many other mothers we know) ended up squeezing our full time work into part time hours so we could also be primary caregivers. > How personal growth journeys – whether that's into deeper spiritual paths or into a feminist awakening – can cause couples to drift apart. > How the pandemic awakened our culture to the many ways modern hetero partnership has failed women and mothers. I think you're going to love my conversation with Cindy. I think it's so relatable for so many of us who are mothering and perhaps grappling with how to navigate our relationships, whether they're ending or evolving.
Welcome all! I'm really excited to introduce you to Enfys J. Book on the Becoming podcast today. I came across Enfys' new book Queer Rites: A Magickal Grimoire to Honor Your Milestones with Pride in a random search for other folks who were just as nerdy about rites of passage as I am. I really loved getting to know them and the conversation we had was just so rich. In this episode, Enfys and I touch on: > The lack of rites of passage for queer folk, and how deeply gendered so many of our "traditional" rites of passage are > How rites of passage are like "anchors to the self." I love the way Enfys described this > The name change ritual that inspired Enfys to write Queer Rites > The pros and cons of labeling our identities, and how we can get more comfortable with the ways in which our identities evolve and change as we do > What makes a ritual "work" and be effective > How queer rites of passage are an act of resistance
Hello beautiful ones, and welcome back to The Becoming Podcast. Today on the show I am thrilled to introduce you to Ruth Allen. I have been following (and loving) Ruth's work for a number of years, and I've absolutely loved her two books, Grounded and Weathering. Her work and her writing has deeply shaped the way I think about the natural world and the way I move my body through it. Let me formally introduce Ruth: Ruth is a writer, embodied psychotherapist and facilitator working primarily outdoors in landscape, and online. Combining her background in geology, with innovative body-based and creative techniques drawing on a multitude of teachings and influences, she offers therapy, mentoring, workshops, classes and adventure retreats - all practical, slow magic - designed to help others connect with their bodies and the rest of nature through depth-full enquiry and practices that deepen our capacity to listen, for the greater whole-health of planet and people. Some of the things Ruth and I talk about on the show are: > The resourcing we can access through witnessing the natural cycles and seasons of the natural world – and also how that is being impacted by climate change. > How to be in relationship with the earth as both a benevolent and even maternal entity – as well as one with the potential for destruction. We talk about the parallels between the concepts of the "ever-giving mother" and the "ever-giving planet," and how both ideologies seem to make those who nurture us vulnerable to exploitation. > What we can learn from rocks as allies in times of change in our lives and in the collective. Ruth talks about the concept of weathering and erosion as being inevitable parts of the process of growth and rising, both for ourselves and our rock kin. > The challenge of extending our ideas about animacy to the seemingly inanimate: rocks. Ruth beautifully hypothesizes that if we can see rock as kin and choose to be in a caring relationship with them, then we can see anyone as kin and care for them just the same. > How Ruth engages in reciprocity with the natural world. And truly, truly so much more! If you're curious about how you might be in deeper connection with the living world and perhaps how that connection might support you through times of weathering in your life, this episode is for you.
Hello beautiful ones! The Becoming Podcast is returning after a somewhat unplanned hiatus, brought to you by Getting Pneumonia A Week After Launching My Book! But here we are again, and I couldn't be more delighted to be welcoming Carmen Spagnola as my first guest of 2025. Carmen has been a friend, colleague and teacher of mine for many years now, and she has just released her latest book, Spells for the Apocalypse: Practical Magic for Turbulent Times, and, given the events of the past few weeks in our world, the timing of this important work couldn't be more auspicious. Before I dive in, let me tell you a little bit about Carmen: Carmen teaches about animism, folk magic, witchcraft, ritual and ancestral knowledge related to land and seasons. She cross-pollinates somatics, attachment, collapse awareness, intersectional feminism, and kinship with the More Than Human in her work as a trauma resolution practitioner. Carmen is the author of The Spirited Kitchen: Recipes and Rituals for the Wheel of the Year, which teaches folklore and spellcraft for the solstices, equinoxes, and half-way points between, based on her training in culinary arts at Le Cordon Bleu Paris. Carmen's professional study includes extensive training in hypnotherapy, interpersonal neurobiology, somatic psychology, mood and personality disorder support, and client-centred assistance for neurodivergent adults, youth, and their caregivers. She is constantly researching current promising practices to provide psychoemotional care and nervous system reconditioning support for people with chronic or episodic disability, with special attention to autoimmunity, dysautonomia, and long COVID. She holds provider certifications for Dynamic Attachment Re-Patterning, The Safe and Sound Protocol, Tension and Trauma Releasing Exercise, The Resilience Toolkit, and Clinical Hypnotherapy. Her spiritual healing repertoire includes numerous certificates spanning a twenty-five year exploration of trance work, regression therapy, energy work, shamanistic practices, systemic constellations, divination, herbalism, kitchen witchery, cultural conservation and ancestral veneration practices, and wilderness quest. Here's some of what we talk about in this episode: What is collapse – both personal and collective. Carmen beautifully names the thing that we all know, now, in our bones, to be true. The power of ritual to soothe, mobilize and transform us when there's nothing else you can *do* in the face of predicament and chaos How Carmen's new book, Spells for the Apocalypse, supports us to feel more skillful, resourced and resilient in times of personal and collective collapse The "gift and the task" of Carmen's personal Quest experience – aka, the promise it would kill her to break How Carmen is coping with grief and rage these days. This is the question Carmen asks everyone on her podcast, the Numinous Podcast, and I was really keen to turn her own question back to her. As she always does, even in the deeply challenging times she's experiencing right now, Carmen models how we might work with grief and rage in meaningful and supportive ways. Carmen and I talk about so, so much more, including our shared experiences of going on Quest, the rituals I did during my own personal time of collapse, what happens when an animist moves to a different ecosystem, and more. I hope you love listening to this episode with Carmen as much as I loved recording it with her!
Hello beautiful ones! I've somehow taken a bit of an unexpected hiatus from the podcast lately, but I'm really, really delighted to share a new episode with you today. It's a super fun and beautiful conversation between three friends – myself, Mara Glatzel and Becca Piastrelli. In this episode, we're turning the tables and Mara and Becca are interviewing ME about the launch of my upcoming book, Mothershift: Reclaiming Motherhood as a Rite of Passage. If you aren't familiar with Mara and Becca, let me tell you a little bit about them first! Mara Glatzel is a coach, podcast host and author of the book Needy: How to advocate for your needs and claim your sovereignty and Becca Piastrelli is a community gatherer and women's circle facilitator, podcast host and author of the book Root and Ritual: Timeless ways to connect with land, lineage, community and the self. These two are friends with each other and they've been my friends for quite a number of years now, and they have been *tireless* champions for Mothershift and my work. Becca is also an alumni of my MotherSHIFT program. They both played a key role in my ability to get a book deal for Mothershift, and for that I will be endlessly grateful. In this episode, Mara and Becca and I talk about: > Why I wrote Mothershift and why this book is so important right now. You'll hear me talk about how I feel like I'm this book's doula, and how easy it's been to share the messages that it holds. > Why "the mothers aren't all right," including my perspective on the US Surgeon General's advisory on the mental health of parents. We talk about the modern conditions that are particularly challenging for mothers as well as parts of the rite of passage into motherhood that have been difficult – but also filled with potential – since time immemorial. > Our relationship with social media, about how it has become a surrogate for the witnessing we need as we step into motherhood, and whether or not we're actually ever seeing the *real* truth about anyone's experience of mothering. > Is postpartum forever? We speculate how many years it takes to feel fully embodied in your experience of motherhood. > The role of ritual in supporting and uplifting our matrescence experiences. I do hope you enjoy listening to this episode as much as we loved recording it, and that it gives you a special sneak peek into the writing of Mothershift.
My friends! I'm really excited to share this interview with the amazing Asha Frost. We had such a beautiful conversation, and Asha has so much wisdom to share, and does so eloquently. Here's some of what Asha and I talk about in this episode: > How Asha's Lupus diagnosis was a threshold moment in her life that made it impossible to keep up with the demands of our modern, capitalist, patriarchal, white supremacist culture – and how she continues to practice slowing down. > The relationship between worthiness and productivity, and the paradox that creativity and "success" often flourish after periods of meaningful rest. As Asha so beautifully phrases, "miracles are born from rest." > Asha shares some of her experiences of her matrescence – her rite of passage into motherhood. > The potential that transformative times in our lives offer to invite us to divest from and disrupt dominant culture. > Elderhood and the elder medicine that lives in all of us, including our non-human kin. Asha and I share our love of herons as elders, and gush over the beauty of her new Animal Elder deck. > Cultural appropriation in the rites of passage space – and how, while it's unacceptable, it comes from our collective desire for meaningful ritual and ceremony to mark these transformative times in our lives.
I'm thrilled to bring you this conversation with Sarah Wildeman on the Becoming Podcast this month. This was such a rich and far-reaching dialogue about all things community-building, which is such an important locus of support – and also struggle – as we traverse times of deep change in our lives. Here's some of what Sarah and I talk about in this episode: > The life-and-death threshold where Sarah learned what it was like to be doing life with people – and where she found the inspiration for a lot of her work now > What it was like living in an intentional community with her family, and how she experienced "the village" firsthand > How "the loss of the village" is not a universal experience, and is actually one that often walks hand-in-hand with the hyper-individualism that comes alongside many cultural privileges > Practical and philosophical wisdom about how to build community, including how asking for help is actually an act of great generosity, how to make your needs known (and identify them in the first place), how to create capacity and room in your life to make community a priority, and how to powerfully invite folks into relationships and gatherings > How hard it is to build community in a season of need in your life > Attachment styles and introversion / extroversion and how they relate to re-villaging > The idea of "tolerating" community and committing to relationship tending even when it's hard, or even when it's not what you'd prefer to be doing I hope you enjoy this interview as much as I did, and that you're able to find some real wisdom and practical support that will help you expand and deepen your community connections. Enjoy!
Hello, friend! I'm really excited to share my conversation with Danielle Cohen with you. If you're a mother, an entrepreneur, a multi-passionate human, or have ever been on either side of a camera, this episode is a must-listen. First, let me tell you a little bit about Danielle. Danielle Cohen is a visibility coach & professional photographer with a unique talent for helping others step into and offer their greatest work. Spanning two decades, her career includes work as a doula, healer, teacher, business consultant, publisher, art director, mentor, and photographer. Known for her keen insights, potent intuition, truth-telling, and her powerful approach to visibility & visuals, Danielle has photographed famous faces and the emerging stars who are forces for good in our world. Her photographs have been featured in magazines, on book covers, as well as on prominent websites, marketing campaigns, and online courses. Here's some of what Danielle and I talk about in this episode: > Being a multi-passionate human and entrepreneur. Honestly, if you've got a bio that reads a bit like Danielle's or if you're a coach / doula / author / wilderness quest guide like me, this conversation is going to make you feel so much less alone, and so well-supported. > How photography helped Danielle heal some of the cultural messaging she received as a young mother > How photography can play an important role in a rite of passage, especially because traversing a rite of passage well usually includes being witnessed in the transformation you're navigating. > How to ritualize photo shoots to allow them to offer the fullest visibility medicine they have the potential to offer > Authenticity and performance in the context of photography and being visible – and how they're not necessarily mutually exclusive > The somatics of visibility and what happened to my body in my latest photoshoot > And then, honestly? Danielle offers an amazing mini-mastermind for any entrepreneur who's visible in the world, especially through photographs. This is SUCH a rich and wide-ranging conversation: there literally is something in this episode for everyone. I hope you enjoy getting to know Danielle and hearing her wisdom as much as I did!
Hello, friend! I'm delighted to share this month's Becoming Podcast episode with you. In it, I interview artist and fellow wilderness quester Glenda Goodrich. Glenda is an artist, art doula, SoulCollage® facilitator, writer, and convener of ceremony. She brings together earth-based rituals, community gatherings, and creative expression in a search for new ways to show love for the Earth. Here's some of what Glenda and I talk about in this episode: > How creativity can support us during rites of passage and times of transition in our lives > How Glenda embraced her own creativity in midlife after a powerful wilderness Quest experience, and how stepping into creativity can be a rite of passage unto itself > The call that the midlife transition offers us to live more authentically > Glenda and I each share some powerful wilderness Quest stories, as well as some of the challenges entangled in embarking on the ritual of Quest > What it is to become your own spiritual authority, and how that can be a journey that is both grief-filled and beautiful > What it means to create authentic, deeply meaningful ritual
I'm really excited to share with you my interview with Megan Sheldon. Megan and I connected through the magic of Instagram a few years ago, and we've recently enjoyed a couple of conversations sharing lots of professional and personal commonalities. Megan holds a tremendous amount of wisdom around grief work, ritual and ceremony, and I'm delighted to have her on the show. Here's some of what Megan and I talk about in this episode: > How engaging with ritual called Megan early on in her life, as well as the origin story of the Be Ceremonial app. > Ritual and spirituality: can you have one without the other? > Many beautiful stories of rituals and ceremonies Megan has facilitated, including funerals, miscarriage and abortion rituals, rituals during illness, and many inspiring and touching others. > The permission we give ourselves – or don't – to grieve and ritualize seemingly invisible moments and turning points in our lives. > Thinking outside the box when it comes to ritual (and breaking a few rules along the way!). > The tender awkwardness of creating ritual for yourself, your family and your community, even when you're new to the practice yourself
I'm delighted to share with you that The Becoming Podcast is back for its 6th season (wow!) and that I've got a full and rich lineup of guests to share with you this year! The first is my dear friend Annie Bray. There were a lot of different titles I could have given this podcast and "Deep Conversation Between Two Brilliant Midlife Friends About The Complexity of Life" was right up there. After we finished this interview, Annie and I chuckled that listening in would be a lot like being welcomed as an eavesdropper in the kind of conversation we might be having anyway, over a cup of tea by a roaring fire, if only we lived in the same city. Our conversation – and our whole friendship – just feels so human. And so if that sounds like a dose of good medicine for you, I invite you to tune in. Here's some of what Annie and I talk about in this episode: > The paradox that traversing times of radical transformation in your life is deeply dysregulating, but that being able to regulate your nervous system is necessary to navigating these times with more ease. > How having a "regulated" nervous system has also been weaponized – particularly against women – and can be conflated with being well behaved or put together. > How our modern perspective of the nervous system is reflective of our culture's individualism, and how we've forgotten the importance of co-regulation with other humans, the more-than-human and the numinous. > How to show up anyway even when you aren't "regulated" or don't have capacity. Annie and I share a tender moment about how I recently asked for her support, and what it means to hold each other through impossible times that, in the world we're living in, don't look to be getting any easier.
Hello beautiful ones! I am so excited to share this month's interview with Lucy Jones with you. I think it might be one of my favourite episodes ever: our conversation was so rich and so full of the kinds of things I think we *really* need to be talking about when it comes to matrescence and motherhood. I started following Lucy in the early days of writing her new book, Matrescence: On the Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth and Motherhood. I was totally captivated by the ecological lens she applied to the transition to motherhood. It was so much like my own perpsective and experience that I felt I'd found a kindred spirit. Lucy's book is one of the first on the experience of matrescence, and it is a raw and riveting account of her own metamorphosis as well as a cultural critique about modern motherhood. As we near the close of registration for the 2023 Season of MotherSHIFT and The Village, I'm delighted to be able to share this conversation with the many of you who are also walking this path of matrescence and matrescence-support. Here's some of what Lucy and I talk about in this episode: > The rarely spoken-of and yet increasingly common ecological awakening that so many new mothers have – and Lucy's personal experience of leaning into her relationship with the living world as she traversed her own matrescence. > The things no one ever fucking told us about motherhood, including the societal expectations of motherhood versus the realities so many of us face. We talk about ideologies around birth and mothering and how they deny us the opportunity to feel "normal" in these richly complex and usually paradoxical experiences. > The absence of modern-day rite and ritual to support us through matrescence, and how we must engage in the act of culture creation in order to reclaim these. > How liberal feminism lets mothers down, and how motherhood revolutionizes our relationship with work (and capitalism). > The untapped power of matrescence to radicalize us and poise us to advocate for social change (the biggest FUCK YES of this whole episode!). I loved this interview so much, and I hope you enjoy tuning in!
Hello beautiful ones! I am so excited to share this month's interview with Heng Ou and Marisa Belger with you. They are the authors of The First Forty Days: The Essential Art of Nourishing the New Mother, which was a groundbreaking book for so many new mothers and postpartum professionals. To say I was delighted to be able to connect with these two amazing women is the understatement of the year! Especially as we approach the launch of the 2023 Season of MotherSHIFT and The Village, this conversation is so rich and filled with wisdom for mamas and their support people alike. Here's some of what Heng, Marisa and I talk about in this episode: > What is true now, for both Heng and Marisa, seven years after their bestselling book The First Forty Days was published. We talk about what has changed and how, in some ways, we're only just beginning. > What happens when we take the traditions of the first forty days and insert them into a capitalist, patriarchal, white supremacist culture – and how having the "perfect postpartum" is another myth that many mothers can become trapped in. > How we try to tame the wildness and unpredictability of pregnancy, birth and motherhood, and how to sit in the unknowns we face during these times. > The intuition that new motherhood gives us access to, how "maternal instinct" has been weaponized against mothers, and how listening to your intuition doesn't necessarily mean you'll always get it right. > What happens to mothers' sense of identity and self-worth when they find themselves dramatically slowing down in the first forty days. > How mothers' relationship with food and their bodies shifts and changes over the course of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and matrescence. I loved this interview so much, and Heng and Marisa have an incredible wealth of wisdom to share. I hope you enjoy tuning in!
Hello beautiful ones! I am so excited to bring you this month's episode of The Becoming Podcast with Mimi Young. Mimi Young is a Taiwanese Canadian animist spirit medium and the founder of Ceremonie, an esoteric brand focused on conversations around greater intuition and creativity, animism, and realigning with our deeper purpose. Mimi works at the intersection of animism and wu shamanism, practical magick, tea kinship, and other Chinese mystic practices to communicate with the Unseen, offering private readings, education and mentorship, and made-to-order skin and aura care. Mimi has held space globally in her Mystery Mentorship program and retreats, as well as collaboratively with brands including Goop, Almost 30, Spirit House Collective, and Tokyo Smoke. She currently holds an online coven space, Homing Coven, open to all who desire to walk closely with the Seen and Unseen. Here's some of what Mimi and I talk about in this episode: > Failure as a confrontation with death that ultimately makes us more human and divine > How to suspend your disbelief and follow your intuition in a hyper-rational world > Animism and working with tea as an ally > How we clutch exogenous sources of intuition like tarot and astrology when we're traversing the unknown, and what to do instead > How the wisdom of the 5 Chinese Elements can support us to thrive in liminal space > How motherhood sparked Mimi's intuition – and how this plays out for so many mothers > The link between creativity and intuition, and the animacy and mystery of Creative Force And so much more. This was such a rich and wide-reaching conversation, and Mimi is so incredibly well-spoken and wise. We had fun, too, and laughed a lot! I hope you enjoy getting to know Mimi as much as I did in this episode.
The Becoming Podcast has been on a short hiatus while I focus on writing my book, but oh what a comeback episode I have for you! This month, I spoke to Toko-pa Turner, who many of you may know as the unofficial patron saint of many of my circles and gatherings because of the sheer number of times I've quoted from the wisdom of her book, Belonging. Toko-pa is a Canadian author, teacher, and dreamworker. Blending the mystical teachings of Sufism in which she was raised with a Jungian approach to dreams, she founded The Dream School in 2001, from which thousands of students have graduated. She is the author of the award-winning book, Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home, which explores the themes of exile and belonging through the lens of dreams, mythology, and nature. This book has resonated for readers worldwide, and has been translated into 10 different languages so far. Her work focuses on the relationship between psyche and nature, and how to follow our inner wisdom to meet with the social, psychological, and ecological challenges of our time. Here's some of what Toko-pa and I talk about in this episode: > The dream that changed Toko-pa's life, causing her to question her career and, ultimately, her identity > How we can court our dreams to support us during times of radical transformation – and the reasons so many of us have a hard time remembering and working with what shows up in our dreamscape > Toko-pa's perspective on the message of Belonging after the divisiveness our society has experienced in the years since it was published > What happened for both Toko-pa and I when we fell out of belonging from the ideologies of the "wellness world" > How to build community when you're under-resourced > "The Big Lie" when it comes to belonging, and how we can reclaim a sense of belonging to the greater family of things, as Mary Oliver so famously wrote
Welcome to the third episode of the 2023 season of the Becoming Podcast! On this month's show, I had the great pleasure of having a conversation with Day Schildkret. I was first introduced to Day's work many years ago when a friend recommended I check out his book, Morning Altars. Now, Day has written Hello Goodbye, a "recipe book" of rituals, that shares wisdom about how we can more meaningfully honour the hellos, goodbyes and other transitions in our lives. Here's some of what Day and I talked about in this episode: > Two massive catalyzing moments that Day experienced in one year, and the choice we have to make meaning of the threshold moments in our lives – or not. > The key components that need to be a part of every ritual in order for it to be successful. > The intangible, magical qualities of ritual and how we in our culture are inclined to "assassinate mystery with answers," rather than allowing the mystery of ritual to unfold. > The importance of having our rituals witnessed, and how to choose good witnesses. And those are just the highlights! I hope you enjoy listening to this episode as much as I enjoyed recording it!
Welcome to the second episode of the 2023 season of the Becoming Podcast! On today's episode, I welcome Jennifer Garvey Berger, someone whose work I've been following for many years, and who I consider to be a valuable teacher of mine. I was so excited to nerd out with her about all things adult development psychology, neuroscience and complexity theory. Before we dive in, let me tell you a bit about Jennifer: The co-founder and CEO of Cultivating Leadership, Jennifer blends deep theoretical knowledge with a driving quest for practical ways to make leaders' lives better. She coaches executives and executive teams, designs and teaches leadership programs. Jennifer has written three highly acclaimed books on leadership and complexity and how to grow the capacities we need for the world in which we live. She hopes her newly-released fourth book, Unleash Your Complexity Genius, will change your life. When she's not working with clients and colleagues, you can find her in the French countryside, where she has bought a house with eleven friends who live in community and try to keep the dog from terrifying the cats. Here's some of what Jennifer and I talked about in this episode: > Jennifer's move to the south of France to a big house with eleven friends, and how re-defining and reclaiming community has grown her and challenged her. > A model of adult development psychology that I use to guide my work with clients and that Jennifer teaches so eloquently. It's all about this amazing shift from allowing the opinions of others to define our lives to taking up the pen and authoring our own rules of engagement. > Jennifer's new book, Unleashing your Complexity Genius, all about how we can grow the capacity of our nervous systems to be more resourceful and resilient in the face of change and complexity. > The surprisingly simple ways to increase your short term, medium term and long term capacity during transformational times – and how these things are actually sources of tremendous pleasure and joy. I hope you enjoy listening to this episode!
Wow! I can't believe we're on season 5 of this podcast! That is 4 years and 36 joyful episodes I've had the pleasure of sharing with you! On today's episode, I welcome The Becoming Podcast's first repeat guest, my friend Mara Glatzel. (You can listen to our first episode together here). If you don't already know Mara, she is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy cycles. Here's some of what Mara and I talked about in this episode: > The publication of Mara's book – and a sneak preview into how she's attuning to her own energy + seasonal cycles as her February 28th launch date approaches. Mara beautifully models how tending to your needs and celebrating your successes is an evolving endeavour that even the "masters" among us will always be ever-mastering. > Grappling with the tension being "professional" and also being a human and caring for humans with oh-so-very human needs, and how it's a political statement to show up just as we are. > How seeing others' humanity begins with seeing, validating and tending to our own humanity. > Radical self-responsibility: the fact that you are the person most intimately familiar with your needs, and are therefore the only person who can really advocate for those needs to be met, by yourself or by those around you. > And a little treat for you at the end! I hope you enjoy listening to this episode! I'm so delighted to shout Mara's work from the rooftops because I think it's the foundation to any life transformation made well.
I know so many of you will be excited to listen to this episode of the podcast with Sarah Vermunt. For almost all of the people I work with, career change ends up be the focus of or at least a part of their process of radical transformation. And that, my friends, is Sarah's speciality! Here's some of what Sarah and I talked about in this episode: > Sarah shares that she has a lot of clients experiencing severe burnout and that so many people are questioning the humanity of the ways we've been asked to show up to work. We also talk about how internalized some of our ways of working are, and that entrepreneurship isn't always "the answer" to our work woes. > The importance of getting clear on who you are and what matters most to you before embarking on career change (or any change!) so that you can step into your next path authentically. We talk about idealized notions of work like the "4 Hour Workweek" and digital nomadism, and how even though they look really great, they're not right for everyone. > How difficult the liminal space – the time of not knowing what you want or where you're headed in your work life – can be in our capitalist, patriarchal, supremacist society. > What the heck a Careergasm actually is, the many ways meaningful work can look for different folks in different phases of our lives, and how, despite what our culture says, none of it is wrong. > How to navigate being a multipotentialite in a world that tells us you have to "niche down," but also how to discern whether all your skills and abilities really need to be monetized. I hope you enjoy listening to this episode! Sarah has so much wisdom to share, and this was a truly fun conversation!
Today on The Becoming Podcast, I'm sharing my conversation with Sarah Durham Wilson. This episode goes DEEP into the wisdom of the archetypes and how we are called to unearth the darkest, gnarliest parts of ourselves in order to fully become. My conversation with Sarah covers: > What the maiden and mother archetypes are, and how to know which one is playing out in your life at any given time > How Sarah is ever-undoing the patriarchal norms that she has internalized, and how we can do the same > What it means to become mature, or to become elders in training, and how that's different from just "getting older" > Honouring initiatory seasons in our lives (aka the dark times), and a reminder that the word "crisis" means dangerous opportunity. > How to discern sovereignty from toxic individualism > How Sarah's midlife crisis made her who she's been dying to be I hope you enjoy listening to this episode! Be sure to grab a pen and journal because Sarah drops some serious wisdom bombs, and they're not to be missed!
I'm really excited to bring you my conversation with Molly Millwood, Ph.D., today. Molly's book, To Have and To Hold: Motherhood, Marriage and the Modern Dilemma, is, hands down, one of the best books on matrescence and maternal mental health that I've ever read....and I've definitely read them ALL. We share so many perspectives on this rite of passage in women's lives that I knew I had to have her on the show, and our time together definitely did not disappoint. First, let me tell you a little bit about Molly. She is a licensed psychologist, author, speaker, singer-songwriter, mother, wife, and devoted advocate for women's mental health and wellbeing. She holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Montana and completed a postdoctoral fellowship at Stanford University Medical Center. After balancing (or more accurately, never quite balancing) an academic career with a part-time psychotherapy practice for over 15 years, Molly now practices therapy full time. She works with adult individuals and couples, helping women rediscover themselves within the metamorphosis of motherhood and helping couples of all sorts improve their relational health. If you are a mother – especially if you're a mother in the first few years of your mothering journey, this episode is for you. Here are some of the things that Molly and I talked about: > The idea of losing yourself in motherhood, and Molly's personal experience of that....and also the opposite: of unearthing and reclaiming parts of herself after she became a mother that she didn't realize she had lost. > Both Molly and I share our own stories of connecting with a deeply creative part of ourselves in motherhood. > What the "modern dilemma" is and how Molly believes mothering is harder now than it has ever been. > Postpartum mental health, the postpartum depression paradox and normalizing the challenging aspects of matrescence. > The double-edged sword of social media for new mothers, the "mask of motherhood" and performative vulnerability. > The challenges that our intimate partnerships face when a baby arrives, how parenting widens the gender gap and is often hardest for people who've strived for equality in their relationships. I hope you enjoy listening to this episode as much as I enjoyed speaking with Molly. We had an instant connection over so many shared ideas, which is obvious in this super-delightful conversation. Mamas, get ready to feel a lot less alone and a lot more normal.
It's my great pleasure to have Kimberly Ann Johnson join me for a rich and wide-ranging conversation on The Becoming Podcast this month. I've been following Kimberly's work since her seminal book, The Fourth Trimester, rocked the worlds of mothers and birth workers alike when it was released five years ago. Since then, I've come to view Kimberly as someone who sees the connections between seemingly unrelated things and brings us insight and wisdom from intersections in the worlds of birth + postpartum wellness, somatics, sex and trauma. Here's a little more about Kimberly: she is a Sexological Bodyworker, Somatic Experiencing practitioner, yoga teacher, postpartum advocate, and single mom. Working hands-on in integrative women's health and trauma recovery for more than a decade, she helps women heal from birth injuries, gynecological surgeries, and sexual boundary violations. Kimberly is the author of the Call of the Wild: How We Heal Trauma, Awaken Our Own Power, and Use It for Good, as well as the early mothering classic The Fourth Trimester, and the upcoming co-authored book with Stephen Jenkinson, Reckoning. She is the host of the Sex Birth Trauma podcast. The conversation I had with Kimberly was so generously informative and thoughtful – I can't wait to share it with you. We talked about: > Kimberly's new book, Reckoning, co-authored with Stephen Jenkinson, on navigating grief in the times we're living in. > How Kimberly's first book, The Fourth Trimester, was truly a roadmap for the rite of passage into motherhood….and also what she feels are the necessary next steps in our culture's approach to postpartum wellness. > How female nervous systems are unique, and how Kimberly's recent book The Call of The Wild invites women to understand their nervous systems and learn what they need. Hint: it's not more deep breaths and hot baths. > How learning the particular language of your nervous system allows you to experience deeper authenticity and power – even in circumstances, like birth, that are often vulnerable. > “Hold it” moments, and how we can metabolize important moments in our lives, no matter how tiny or tectonic their impact.
Oh my friends, this month's episode of the Becoming Podcast is so special, in so many ways. First of all, I'm just going to come right out and say it: this is one of those fangirl episodes where I reach out to someone I adore and whose work I've been following for many, many years, and cross my fingers. It was such an honour to have Amber say an enthusiastic YES to my request, and to then have such a beautifully connecting, heartfelt conversation together. If you're not familiar with Amber and her work, here's what you should know: Amber is an herbalist, homesteader, and podcaster who is caretaking two daughters, four cats, and seven chickens on an herb farm in Northern California. She helps her online community remember what it is to be human upon the earth through earth and ancestor connection. Amber is the creator of the Mythic Medicinals line of herbal and mushroom medicines and the host of the Medicine Stories podcast. The conversation I had with Amber was rich, meandering and deeply thought-provoking. We talked about: > Amber's journey into motherhood and then into herbalism, and how that naturally led to a curiosity about ancestral lifeways > Evolutionary mismatch theory, and how modern life is both burning us out and waking us up > What it's like to parent in these times, where we often lack the traditional ways of knowing, community support and rites of passage (for us as mothers and for our children) that we need to guide us > What it means to reclaim deep self- and inner-knowing as a way to navigate these challenging times with more ease, competence and integrity This episode covers so very many of my favourite things, from herbalism and earth connection to mothering to rites of passage. I hope you enjoy the conversation I had with Amber as much as I did.
When I read Lisa Marchiano's new book, Motherhood: Facing and Finding Yourself, I knew I had to have her on the podcast. Though I usually work with mothers who are traversing the initial few years of their mothering journey, I found Lisa's book deeply insightful and comforting for the mothering experiences that I'm currently having. Let me tell you a little bit about Lisa: Lisa Marchiano, LCSW is a writer and Jungian analyst in private practice in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. She is the cohost and creator of the popular podcast This Jungian Life. She teaches at the C.G. Jung Institute of Philadelphia, and lectures widely on Jungian topics. In addition to being the author of Motherhood: Facing and Finding Yourself, Lisa's writings have appeared in Quillette, The Journal of Analytical Psychology, and Psychological Perspectives, among other publications. The conversation I had with Lisa spans so many topics, including: > How a deeper sense of inner knowing is a gift that motherhood offers us, if we'll accept it > How motherhood invites us to move into deeper self-authority > How our relationships with our own mothers shift when we become mothers ourselves > A new version of the well-known Selkie story that reframes it as a failed initiation, and shows us what a "successful" initiation into motherhood requires > How losing yourself in motherhood is necessary, and not a bad thing at all This is a powerful episode that I found so resonant to my own motherhood journey, and those of the mamas I support. I hope you are inspired and heartened by Lisa's wisdom.
Welcome back for another episode of The Becoming Podcast, friends! I'm thrilled to bring you this deep and thought-provoking conversation with Shauna Janz. Shauna is an educator, facilitator and ritualist at the crossroads of grief, trauma, embodiment and ancestral healing work. For the past 15 years she has worked in both private practice offering 1:1 support, and with national and international organizations offering trauma-informed facilitation training, grief literacy and curriculum development, and ancestral healing rituals to diverse audiences. I wanted to have Shauna on the show because grief work continues to play a huge role in the work that I do: it's an inextricable part of what it means to traverse change in our lives. Our conversation begins with Shauna's intimate insight into the grief journey that she's traversing right now. Relatedly, we talk about what we have "permission" to grieve. Shauna offers profound wisdom around the conditions and capacities that support us in our grieving process, as well as how grief can be an elder that ushers us into who we're becoming. We talk about the cultural influences on grief and who "gets" to grieve, and how to have agency with what can be an all-consuming experience. We continue on in a conversation around somatics and embodiment, the loss of community witnesses for our grief, and how we pathologize grief.
A big welcome to this month's Becoming Podcast guest, Mara Glatzel! Mara and I have known each other for years, and I was really excited for our conversation. It did not disappoint. As many of you know, self-tending is one of the Seven Core Competencies of Radical Transformation – those skills and capacities that we need to grow in order to traverse times of change in our lives with more ease. Given that Mara is the QUEEN of all things tending to your needs, I just had to have her on the show. Let me tell you a little bit about Mara. Mara is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honouring their natural energy cycles. Her superpower is saying what you need to hear when you need to hear it and she is here to help you believe in yourself as much as she believes in you. Our conversation was rich and lively. Mara shared the way that she thinks about self-care and tending, and how we need to shift from a prescriptive model of what "good self-care" looks like and into learning how to recognize what we requireto honour our humanity and keep being the humans we want to be. We talked about "thin times" – when we're going through transformation or challenge – and how to grow our capacity through meaningful tending. We also talk about honouring our humanity by asking for what you need in work and caregiving contexts. As I listened back to our conversation in the editing process, I realized that both Mara and I have the privilege of being able to (even if we don't always) structure our work in a way that allows us to take time off when we need to, and that's reflected in our conversation. Even if this isn't the case for you, I hope maybe you can feel inspired to be audacious in the supports you feel you can ask for (and maybe some of the ones you feel you can't, just for good measure). Finally, we muse on the idea that maybe seeking a more human way of living and meeting our needs actually might be the rite of passage that underlies them all, and that the ability to centre your needs will never be more important than it is now, as the world becomes an increasingly challenging place to live. I hope you enjoy this interview as much as I did!
On this month's podcast, I had the great pleasure of connecting with Carmen Spagnola. I first learned of Carmen's work quite a few years ago now, and since then have taken a number of her programs. I value her as a teacher and guide also exploring what it means to traverse rites of passage and other initiatory experiences, as well as a fellow multipotentialite who sees the throughlines and patterns between seemingly unrelated things and, in so doing, brings us ideas and concepts that are inspiring and new. Here's a little more about Carmen: she works at the intersection of attachment, somatic attunement, and personal/collective trauma. People find her because something is collapsing within or around them – their relationship, self-identity, ecosystem, or something else. Carmen is a trauma recovery practitioner, clinical hypnotherapist, attachment support worker and teacher, podcast host since 2014, Wilderness Quest guide, Le Cordon Bleu (Paris)-trained chef, rose and vegetable gardener, witch of no particular affiliation, and animist, among other things. She has taught intuition development workshops since 2011, including her popular year-long program, The Numinous School, which ran for 7 years online. Her courses, workshops, and live classes are now found all in one place in The Numinous Network. Her book, The Spirited Kitchen: Recipes and Rituals for the Wheel of the Year,will be released on October 18, 2022, by Countryman Press | W.W.Norton. In this episode, Carmen shares with us the catalyzing moment that brought her to her knees – and to the way she lives and shows up in the world, as well as in her work, today. She talks about how she followed her childhood spiritual curiosity into learning about and supporting people from a rites of passage lens through ritual and initations. Carmen shares with us the Four Shields of Human Development model of transformation that she uses as a framework for this work. Then she dives into a Quest story that beautifully illustrates how this framework shows up in people's lived experiences. We finish our conversation with Carmen sharing a bit about her upcoming cookbook, which I literally •cannot wait• to have on my shelf! I loved this thoughtful, rich and meandering conversation with Carmen and I hope you do too!
Rachael Maddox is a trauma resolution educator, coach and guide who's helped hundreds of humans move from sexual, complex or developmental trauma into pleasure, power and trust-filled relationships. I really wanted to have Rachael on the show today to talk about the possibility of trauma resolution as a rite of passage. Rachael is a gifted map-maker for the terrain of embodied healing and of what it means to alchemize traumatic experiences and wounds into power and potential. Our conversation starts with Rachael's own story of taking up the initiatory call to heal. We talk about how taking up that call, for so many of us, asks us to move from a place of "rebellion and blame" to "responsibility and creativity." Rachael shares with us, in detail, a map of embodied healing based in nervous system regulation and orienting to pleasure, joy, and "our natural blueprint of health." She also gives us a brief glimpse into the archetype-based model of trauma resolution she has developed. (It is brilliant, and I totally want to know more!). Finally, we talk about what it means to rest + digest after a time of major change – that it is natural for us to contract after a period of expansion, and that this can be challenging in a culture that doesn't make it easy to rest and recalibrate. Rachael generously shares ideas and resources throughout our interview that I know you will be able to use in your own life. Make sure you grab a pen and journal for this one! I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did.
The final episode of Season 3 of The Becoming Podcast is a conversation with Jen Berlingo, midlife midwife extraordinaire. Jen is a coach, licensed professional counselor, a nationally registered art therapist, a master-level Reiki practitioner, an author, an artist and a witch. She speaks, writes and teaches about midlife emergence, including her own world-rocking experience of upending her entire life as she entered her forties. It's obvious why I had to have her on the show, right? Our conversation kicks off with The Ani Difranco Songs That Changed Our Lives, and it just gets better from there, people. Jen shares so much wisdom, including the astrological significance of our 42nd year of life, and the common themes she has found woven throughout so many women's experience of midlife. We talk about how to manage the fear of Doing The Thing, and how women's transformations happen relationally and in relationship, not usually as a result of the traditionally-valued experience of "leaving the village" on a quest and returning changed. Jen talks specifically about how she traversed the midlife decision that changed everything for her through showing up for deep and deeply uncomfortable conversations. We talked about how answering the call to midlife emergence is a form of lineage healing, and she shared how intuition and embodiment supported her through this massive change. This conversation is so rich and so full of courage: it's a must-listen for anyone, especially anyone who is approaching or navigating through midlife right now.
During our conversation, Heather and I talk about the "liminal space" or that "space between" that is a necessary and uncomfortable part of every major transition – and so much a part of what we're all experiencing in these times of uncertainty. We talk about how major "disruptions" in our lives can be a powerful call that we have the opportunity to answer. Heather and I consider what it means to have agency as we answer that call, and how we can dance with both the discomfort and the potential of transformation. We talk about how we can resource ourselves well enough to embark on a transformative journey, and to hold space for others who are in that process. Heather shares how our loss of the "village" and a sense of community affects how well-resourced we are. She also shares her "Spiral of Authenticity," which is a model of how major transformations can help us to become more of who we are. I could literally keep going on and on for another two paragraphs *just summarizing* the depths of our beautiful conversation, but I'm going to let you go ahead and listen for yourself. Be sure to grab a paper and pen for this one – Heather shares some incredible insight that you're not going to want to miss.
I'm delighted to introduce Nikki McCahon to you today. I have been following Nikki for some time – she has so much wisdom to share about the transition into motherhood, and we share so many of the same perspectives and beliefs. It was wonderful to dive deeper with her here on this episode. Let me tell you a little bit about Nikki. She is a matrescence educator, women's life cycle guide, podcast host and mother of one charming and cheeky five-year-old. Nikki helps mothers who feel lost and overwhelmed by the transition into motherhood to reframe their experiences as an opportunity for expansion, transformation, and personal growth. Nikki helps women explore their matrescence journey within the context of their broader life cycles and rites of passage, and to reclaim their self-authority and personal power. She is passionate about creating community and normalizing the physical, psychological and emotional changes women go through during motherhood. I often say that we focus so much on the loss of self in motherhood and all the challenges this rite of passage presents us with that we forget all of the tremendous gifts it offers too. Postpartum growth is a theme running throughout the conversation between Nikki and I. She begins by talking about her own journey into motherhood, and how she began to lose the need for external validation and find another way to regard her self-worth as she entered into her mothering years. She talks about the power of making the transition from the archetypal Maiden to Mother, and how that represents a risk to our "standing" in society, but ultimately results in our ability to develop our own voices and claim a sense of internal power and self-authority. We conclude with Nikki's powerful insights on building community and finding your "village" – and how to do that in a way that doesn't create even more divisiveness between us. Her thoughts here gave me pause, and I hope they'll offer you some insight as well. If you're a new (or new-ish) mama, or love someone who is, you will especially enjoy today's special matrescence episode with Nikki.
I am so delighted to introduce you to Stepha Lafond on this month's episode of The Becoming Podcast. Stepha is a life coach and mentor dedicated to helping moms navigate the space between who they are and who they are becoming. You can imagine why I just had to have Stepha on the show, right? Stepha started her practice out of a desire to put moms at the center of the conversation, with an emphasis shifting the narrative on modern motherhood to one that allows space for mamas to grow, heal and take care of themselves at all stages of their journey. Her work on Matrescence- the transition into motherhood- invites her clients and spectators alike, to explore and hold space for this common but rarely discussed phase of development, whilst taking a critical look at the unjust systems and power structures impacting motherhood and creating necessary shifts towards liberation. Stepha and I had a totally delightful, high-energy conversation, full of laughs even as we tackled some really difficult issues facing mothers today. Stepha began by sharing her experience of the transition to motherhood, which was marked by the support of her grandmother for her first child, and then the loss of her grandmother right before her second child was born. She shares how experiencing that kind of deep support in the early days of her matrescence made her want to offer the same to other mothers, and catalyzed her to start her coaching practice. From there, we talk about "the things no one talks about" when it comes to becoming a mother, and some of the systemic, cultural and political influences on mothers – especially BIPOC mothers - today. Our conversation moves into the prevalence of birth trauma, and how challenging it can be to traverse identity shift while also navigating a healing journey. Stepha shares how mothers can "embrace the slower pace" and live in your season as a mother. Finally, we talk about taking radical responsibility and advocating for your needs, and how we are all both members of the village we mothers so desperately need, and recipients of its care.
I am really, really thrilled today to share this conversation with author, artist and publisher Lucy Pearce. Lucy's books, including Moods of Motherhood and Nautilus Award winners Medicine Woman, Burning Woman, and Creatrix: she who makes have shaped me, my work and my life in so many ways. One of the common threads in this interview is how Lucy endeavours to write about and give language to the things that so many of us feel we are experiencing in isolation, not realizing that so much of what we are going through is actually a collective experience – and that we are never alone. Lucy and I dive into the paradox of creativity in motherhood, how we can dismantle individualistic ways of approaching our healing, how we can lean into the cycles of nature to normalize the cycles in our lives, and the creative process as a rite of passage. We finish our conversation with Lucy sharing a little bit about her new book, She of The Sea, which is about the mysterious pull of the sea and of water that washes over so many of us as we're traversing changes in our lives. I had full-body chills as she described this book – a sure sign that I will have to have Lucy back on the show to tell us even more about She of The Sea. For now, though, I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did. We weave through so many important and fascinating topics, and Lucy's wisdom shines throughout.
I am so jazzed to share this episode of The Becoming Podcast with you today. Graeme Seabrook and I have the most vivacious and far-reaching conversation about motherhood, and I know you will enjoy it. Let me tell you about Graeme: she is a maternal mental health expert, advocate, and community leader who helps moms and reconnect with and embrace their humanity. As a certified life coach and founder of The Mom Center, an online community exclusively for moms, she's coached over 3,000 moms on how to place their names at the top of their priority list, without guilt or shame. I first learned of Graeme and her work when I listened to her amazing interview on our mutual friend Mara Glatzel's podcast. Graeme totally blew my mind on that podcast when she talked about the concept of what I've come to call "reclaiming the matriarchy," which essentially says that if mothers are going to do all the emotional and physical and spiritual labour for their families that they do, their needs should be centred in their families. I've since written about that concept in my own way here. In this conversation with Graeme, we explore that theme more deeply, and she shares with me how that philosophy has evolved over the past couple of years. We talk about the societal and cultural influences on motherhood, and she reminds all mamas that you're not broken, motherhood is. Graeme totally debunks the idea of "putting your oxygen mask on first," which basically stopped me completely in my tracks during our interview. We talk about what empowered motherhood looks like, the power to be found in surrender, and finally, Graeme shares how we can better understand and support BIPOC mothers. She shares the best piece of guiding advice for this, reminding us that we, as a collective of mothers, are only as healthy and well as those of us who are most marginalized.
I've been working with a theme of healing and illness as a rite of passage in my writings and offerings this month. I could not think of anyone I wanted to speak to more on that topic than Lara Veleda Vesta. Lara has an MFA, is an artist, author, storyteller and educator transforming chronic illness into a path of healing and reclaiming. She is the author of The Moon Divas Guidebook, and The Moon Divas Oracle, illustrator of The Moon Divas Oracle Cards and the newly released Wild Soul Runes: Reawakening the Ancestral Feminine. Her research interests include ancestral connection, mythtelling and disability as initiation, and she is currently creating an illustrated guide to death transitions. Her path of myth, folk magic, ancestor lore and ritual practice is shared through classes at the Wild Soul School. This is an incredibly rich conversation that I know you will love: Lara shares her experience of chronic illness and how thinking of this experience as a rite of passage and an initiation supported her. We talk about the fundamental optimismthat a rites of passage lens allows us: that fallow times are okay, that grieving is okay, and that you will emerge from this time with some kind of lesson or gift. Lara talks in-depth about four things that have supported her during the radical transformations she's traversed in her life: myth, earth connection, ritual and her connection to her ancestors. She shares her "non-negotiable" daily ritual that keeps her grounded and attuned to her inner knowing. Finally, we talk about divination and the cultivation of intuition and meaning-making. There are SO many pearls of wisdom, reassurances and big ideas in this podcast. You'll definitely want to grab a pen and notebook for this one! Enjoy!
Today's guest is Becca Piastrelli. Becca is a writer, coach, and host of the Belonging podcast. She holds space for women to explore ancestral wisdom, connect with the earth, and find meaningful and inclusive community. In the age of loneliness, Becca shows us how to feel like we truly belong - to each other, to the earth, to a lineage, and to ourselves. She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her partner, child, two cats, and five chickens, where she gardens, cooks, mothers, and gathers with the ebb and flow of the seasons. Belonging is Becca's jam, and I knew I had to have her on the podcast because so very often, when we traverse radical transformation, we experience a disruption to our sense of belonging. I had the pleasure of connecting with Becca a few months ago when she interviewed me for her podcast, and we've been enjoying connecting about motherhood, earth connection, ritual, and so much more ever since. In this episode, that's exactly what we dive into: Becca shares her experience of being a new mom of her eight month old daughter, Atlas, and how even though she had done so much work before having a baby to slow down her life, reconnect with her body and the land, and get comfortable with discomfort and liminality, motherhood taught her so many lessons and allowed her to deepen this often-confronting work. We talk about what it means to belong to yourself, and how influences like social media and diet culture can so easily pull us away from that sense of rootedness. Becca shares how her connection with the earth has been a grounding force in the last year, and how simple it can be to develop your own relationship with the earth. Finally, we explore the topic of Becca's upcoming book, Root and Ritual: Timeless ways to connect with land, lineage, community and the self, including how to build ritual into your life in the smallest ways, and how we can all be engaged in the act of culture creation through ritual design. I know you'll love this conversation as much as I did, and you'll come away with so many insights and potential new practises! Enjoy!
I'm so excited to be welcoming Dr. Sarah Kerr on The Becoming Podcast this month. Sarah is a death doula, ritual healing practitioner, and trainer, and in her work, she helps dying people and their families connect with each other, and with the innate wisdom of the dying process. Sarah's work draws on ancient wisdom teachings, nature-based spirituality, sacred sciences, and the richness of the human soul. She designs and facilitates ceremonies that help her clients and their families to integrate experiences of illness, death and loss. These rituals honour the spiritual significance of what is happening, and bring healing to the living, the dying, and the dead. I came across Sarah and her work several years ago when my curiosity was sparked about how I could better support women through grief, as well as understanding my own relationship with death and grieving. I've since taken all four of Sarah's classes on Ritual Skills for Living and Dying, and appreciate her as a gifted teacher and wise guide to those of us who are working to reclaim ritual and rites of passage, and contemplate grief and loss. In our conversation, Sarah and I talk about the alchemy of ritual as "energy medicine for the collective body" and how we need ritual to help our souls catch up when massive change has occurred to our physical reality, or when our souls have traversed a radical transformation but our physical reality hasn't caught up yet. She shares that ritual can be simple and still powerful, and doesn't have to involve all the "bells and smells" that we often associate with ritual. We talk about rites of passage, and the difference between "change" and transformation - as in the difference between getting older and becoming elder, or having a baby and becoming a mother. We dive into a deeper conversation around grief and how we are often denied - or deny ourselves - the opportunity to fully grieve our losses. Finally, Sarah shares what she's learned about life from supporting people through death. I loved every minute of this conversation, and soaked up every piece of Sarah's wisdom - and I know you will too.
In this conversation, author, mythologist and childbirth educator Britta Bushnell and I talk about the domino effect that radical transformation tends to have in our lives, and how we often end up experiencing shifts and changes to many areas of our lives rather than only one. Specifically, we dive into the experience of how to re-negotiate our intimate partnerships in the wake of major transformation - one of Britta's specialties. Britta also shares wisdom about how to meet your needs and re-parent yourself in times of radical change. We talk about what Britta has learned from supporting birthing people that can be applied to all rites of passage, and then we traverse into eight cultural ideals that influence birth, exploring how these are actually phenomena that deeply influence our entire culture, and might just represent the collective rite of passage of our times.
It was SO exciting to get to chat with Molly for this episode. In our conversation, Molly and I dive right into a moment of full honesty and transparency, and then traverse through the question of authenticity and how social media impacts how we share our lives - or don't. We talk about what reclamation means to Molly, and she offers her thoughts on what it means to be more yourself in your day-to-day life. We jam on the big intersection between my work and hers: how living a life that is more authentic often necessitates us to make radical changes to our lives. Finally, our conversation completes with a beautiful gift that Molly offered to all of us. This episode is so fun, and listening to it is like hanging out with two girlfriends around the fire and talking about what really matters. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
I am so unbelievably excited to bring to you the final episode of the first full season of The Becoming Podcast. In this episode, I had the pleasure of speaking to psychologist, mythologist and author Sharon Blackie. I first learned of Sharon's work when a friend recommended her book If Women Rose Rooted. For me, I feel as though I can almost define my life and my work into what it was before I read If Women Rose Rooted and what it evolved into after. It was profoundly awakening for me. (you can imagine how excited and nervous I was to have Sharon on the show!) In this episode, Sharon and I talk about "falling out of myth," when we question the cultural narrative that we've been indoctrinated to follow, the rite of passage of becoming what Sharon calls a "mythical misfit" who opts of out the overculture to follow a more authentic path, and how we mythical misfits drive the change our world so badly needs right now. We spoke of the "Eco-Heroine's Journey" and how connecting with the earth and place defines and supports our rites of passage, particularly as women. Sharon shares wisdom about eldership, menopause, motherhood and women's rage, and how to trust rather than deny the inherent power of our embodied rites of passage. We dive into the importance of apprenticeship and liminal space in our process of becoming, and also how so many of us are what Sharon calls "cultural orphans" who need to remember our way back into belonging with our own lineage and ancestry. This conversation was everything I hoped it would be and more: it's so incredibly rich and I literally cannot wait for you to listen, enjoy, and steep yourselves in Sharon's wise words.
I am so delighted to share with you today my interview with my friend Dee Montie. Dee is an Intuitive Shamanic Healer who helps people connect with intuition and Spirit in honour of creating healing and balance. She currently offers private intuitive healing sessions, group healing circles, space healings, and mentorship trainings. Her work is intuitively driven, guided by Spirit, and balanced by earth-based energies and lighthearted humour. I first had the pleasure of meeting Dee a few years ago, and our lives have interwoven in beautiful and surprising ways ever since. We talk about Dee's experience of a spiritual awakening, and how traversing that experience was a rite of passage for her. She shares what it was like to have what I've been calling a "rite of the heart" - one of those changes to your life that changes everything on the inside (your mind, your perspective, your very soul) but very little on the outside (as Dee phrases it: even though she felt her inner reality had totally shifted, she still wore jeans, had a husband and kid, and had to make breakfast in the morning). Then we dive into the topic of intuition - how to hear it, how to trust it, and how to allow it to guide you in your life. As I'm typing this, I feel like saying that Dee is "the people's" shamanic healer :) As in, she does, indeed, wear jeans, does school pick up, and makes breakfast every morning. She has a way of inviting us into the magic of the unseen and unknown that is incredibly down-to-earth and approachable. I think you will love this conversation I have with her: if you're experiencing an inner transformation or spiritual awakening right now, this will help you feel a little less alone, and everyone listening will be inspired to explore and play with their intuition in a new way.
I am delighted to have Dr. Aurélie Athan on the show with me today. Aurélie is a professor at Columba University in New York City, and is the world's leading researcher in matrescence and the transition to motherhood. To say that this conversation was absolutely sparkling is an understatement. Aurélie and I talked about what matrescence, or the transition to motherhood, is, and, as she says, "how to raise a mother." We talked about the pathologization and the potential of this transition in women's lives, and how challenging our modern-day context can make this process of initiation and growth. We dove into the inner workings of the psychology of matrescence with a depth of conversation that is rare in today's discourse around postpartum, talking about "the next level" of postpartum support that goes beyond saying *that* the transition to motherhood happens and into *how* it happens. We also talked about motherhood as a spiritual path, a path toward sovereignty and self-authorship, matricentric feminism, and the competencies that motherhood teaches us that lend themselves to leadership and, you know, smashing the patriarchy and saving the world. It's no exaggeration to say that this is probably one of the richest conversations about the psychology of matrescence I've heard (and gotten to participate in!) in all my years of working in this field. This truly is the "next level" of how we understand and traverse the transition to motherhood, and it will be fascinating for both mothers and birth and postpartum support workers alike. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
All the mamas listening, this one is for you! I'm delighted to share with you my conversation with Beth Berry from Revolution From Home. Beth is a life coach, small group and retreat facilitator, mother of four daughters and author of the recently published #1 Best Seller Motherwhelmed. Follow her journey at www.revolutionfromhome.com. I first learned of Beth and her work (and how many perspectives on modern-day mothering we share!) when I read her article in Motherly, titled "In the absence of the village, mothers struggle most." Earlier this year, I got to be an advance reviewer of her book, Motherwhelmed, and I knew immediately I had to have her on the show. Our conversation dips and dives through so many of the complex and nuanced realities of what it means to be a mother. We talk about the loss of the village and the challenge of meeting the needs of ones' children and oneself without the kind of support that that requires. Beth shares about her time living with her family in Mexico, and the perspective she gained when she traded fast-paced motherhood for a simpler life with her kids. We talk about evolving through motherhood, becoming a mother as a rite of passage that is no longer celebrated and honoured, how motherhood asks us to mother ourselves (and how to begin doing that!) and how to begin to reclaim a new kind of "village" to support us as we traverse the journey of parenting. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did!
I am delighted to share with you today my interview with Lynn Trotta. Lynn is a life coach and nature-based mentor whose work I originally learned about while reading one of Martha Beck's books, which she was featured in, several years ago. I've been following her and her work ever since, and our work and interests have only continued to overlap and align - so you can imagine how thrilled I was when she agreed to be on the show! Lynn and I talk about how she came to be doing the work she's doing, and about how she's healed her own trauma through connection with the Earth. I am still sitting with her way of articulating this connection: she said that being in nature is like laying in the lap of an unconditionally loving mother. We talked about ecofeminism and how women, in particular, can benefit from deeper earth connection. Lynn shares with us some simple ways to begin to reclaim your attunement to nature. Our conversation meanders through the increasingly popular idea of "rewilding" and and what it means to be a "cultural orphan." Finally, Lynn shares with us some incredible wisdom about her ritual and ceremony work. Again, her words stuck with me: "a life without ceremony is a life unobserved." I have a strong conviction that earth connection is one of the most powerful healing modalities for women, and that it's in connection with nature that we reconnect with ourselves and our authenticity, our purpose, and our inner knowing. Whether you're a seasoned tree hugger or an earth loving newbie, I think you will love this episode.
I am so (so!) thrilled to bring you this sparkling conversation with artist, mama and wildly successful entrepreneur Leonie Dawson. Our conversation was rich and covered a broad range of topics. Leonie shared some of her story of becoming a mother, and how that was a challenging but catalyzing rite of passage in her life. We talked about how relationships with loved ones and partners change when we change, and about how creativity has always been the way Leonie processes, metabolizes and copes with radical transformation in her life. Leonie is the creator of a bestselling series of planners and goal books for women, and so we talked about the role of goals in facilitating change, and Leonie introduced me to the idea of the Big Hairy Audacious Goal (or BHAGs, as she so sagely puts it). Our conversation meandered through the topics of self-care, the power of women's circles and reclaiming ancestral skills. Seriously, we talked about everything. I hope you enjoy this conversation and learn as much from it as I did!
I think of Tara as a "get shit done" gal, and I was excited to talk to her because there comes a point in everyone's process of radical transformation and other big life and business shifts that we need to start to take action in the direction of the future we want. Tara and I talk about values-based goal setting and a really helpful way to receive honest feedback on how you're living out your values on the day-to-day. We also talk about integrating your goals into the wider ecosystem of your life. Tara shares her method for guiding clients through the "life cycles of their business" and how to learn from failure, and we also jam on the value of community-building and what that looks like in modern society. This is a rich episode full of really tangible, pragmatic support. I know you will love it, and be able to incorporate some of Tara's suggestions, thoughts and practices into your life right away. Enjoy!
In this episode I talk to one of the sparkliest humans I know, artist and yogi Estelle Thomson. While Estelle and I have jammed on previous podcast episodes (both hers and mine) about grief, creativity and ritual, today's conversation is a diversion from our usual. Estelle is a (not so) secret lover of fashion, and so we talk about how radical transformation and rites of passage are so often accompanied by changes to our outer expressions of identity. We talk about using colour as spiritual expression, and how we can become more ourselves when we look more ourselves. This is a truly fun, juicy and light-hearted conversation with lots of food for thought and some excellent practical advice.
In this episode I talk to Kathy Washburn, coach, cancer survivor, and founder of Carved By Cancer. We talk about the catalyzing moments that reshape your life, and what it's like when the rest of your life doesn't change along with you. Kathy talks about post-traumatic growth and how our sense of embodiment, sexuality and creativity is an integral part of any transformative healing process.
Join me as I speak with Tracie Nichols, self-professed Rebel Crone, who shares wisdom about the transition into our elder years, and how connecting with the earth can support all our most radical life transformations.
This is the MotherSHIFT Edition of The Becoming Podcast. In this episode, I share what I've learned about the transition to motherhood after supporting birthing women for over a decade as a doula.