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In December 2018 Gatwick Airport shut down. 109 eyewitnesses reported sighting 170 drone flights over the airport. All flights were grounded, and the nation braced for a terrorist attack. But what if those sightings weren't real but instead an imagination caused by expectations? In today's episode with award-winning science journalist David Robson, we explore the science of the expectation effect. Link to the bonus episode: https://nudge.kit.com/86d3e39845 Become an FSB member: https://get.fsb.org.uk/nudge/ Read the Expectation Effect: https://amzn.to/4dvkb3s David's website: https://davidrobson.me/ David's Substack: https://davidarobson.substack.com/ --- Today's sources: Benedetti, F., Durando, J., & Vighetti, S. (2014). Nocebo and placebo modulation of hypobaric hypoxia headache involves the cyclooxygenase-prostaglandins pathway. Pain, 155(5), 921–928. Job, V., Dweck, C. S., & Walton, G. M. (2010). Ego depletion—Is it all in your head? Implicit theories about willpower affect self-regulation. Psychological Science, 21(11), 1686–1693. Langer, E., Djikic, M., Pirson, M., Madenci, A., & Donohue, R. (2010). Believing is seeing: Using mindlessness (mindfully) to improve visual acuity. Psychological Science, 21(5), 661–666. Merckelbach, H., & van de Ven, V. (2001). Another white Christmas: Fantasy proneness and reports of 'hallucinatory experiences' in undergraduate students. Journal of Behavior Therapy and Experimental Psychiatry, 32(3), 137–144. Montes, J., Wulf, G., & Navalta, J. W. (2018). Maximal aerobic capacity can be increased by enhancing performers' expectancies. Journal of Sports Medicine and Physical Fitness, 58(5), 744–749. Pirson, M., Ie, A., & Langer, E. (2012). Seeing what we know, knowing what we see: Challenging the limits of visual acuity. Journal of Adult Development, 19(2), 59–67. Robson, D. (2022). The expectation effect: How your mindset can transform your life. Canongate.
Something is wrong, and most of us can feel it without being able to say exactly what it is. 61% of Americans now identify as lonely. Anxiety and depression are at historic highs. We've never had more mental health professionals — and we've never had more mental health crises. We are more "connected" than any generation in human history, and more isolated than any we have ever measured. In this conversation, author Michael Trainer (Resonance: The Art and Science of Human Connection) and Mark Groves go deep on the question that most of the wellness industry won't touch: what if this isn't a personal problem? What if we are biological beings — with nervous systems built for fire, proximity, and tribe — being asked to function inside a machine specifically designed to exploit every vulnerability we have? They cover: — Why your gut feeling about a person is not a hunch but precise physiological data — and what the HeartMath Institute's 40 years of research says about who gets to tune you — The difference between a battery and a black hole — and why some traditional "givers" are draining you — What Beethoven going deaf, a chef losing his sense of taste, and a nonverbal man in a nursing home hearing Chet Baker all have in common — Dave Chappelle walking away from $50 million, going to Africa to find himself, and weeping when a tribe sang him back — Why there is no medicine, no biohack, and no supplement on the planet that can approximate having one person you can call at 2am — and what the Harvard Study of Adult Development (80 years of data) confirms about what actually determines how long you live — The seventh-generation Sri Lankan healer who had no word for privacy, no word for possession — and who healed people by placing them at the center of a circle and bringing the whole community together to return them to the collective heartbeat — Why the revolution, when it comes, will be analog This is not a conversation about self-optimization. It is a conversation about remembering what we are. Michael Trainer has spent 30 years learning from Nobel laureates, neuroscientists, and wisdom keepers worldwide. He's the author of RESONANCE: The Art and Science of Human Connection (March 31, 2026), co-creator of Global Citizen and the Global Citizen Festival, and host of the RESONANCE podcast.Featured in Forbes, Inc, Good Morning America. Follow on YouTube
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 3430: Cylon George explores why the strongest predictor of lasting happiness is not wealth or achievement, but the quality of our relationships. Drawing on decades of research, he offers practical ways to strengthen human connection and reduce loneliness, helping listeners cultivate greater well-being and purpose. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.spirituallivingforbusypeople.com/social-fitness-the-key-to-a-fulfilling-life Quotes to ponder: "Tell your people you love them. Life is so fragile." "Loneliness kills. It's as powerful as smoking or alcoholism." "Social fitness requires taking stock of our relationships, and being honest with ourselves about where we're devoting our time and whether we are tending to the connections that help us thrive." Episode references: The Good Life by Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/705876/the-good-life-by-robert-waldinger-and-marc-schulz/ The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness (TED Talk): https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 3430: Cylon George explores why the strongest predictor of lasting happiness is not wealth or achievement, but the quality of our relationships. Drawing on decades of research, he offers practical ways to strengthen human connection and reduce loneliness, helping listeners cultivate greater well-being and purpose. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.spirituallivingforbusypeople.com/social-fitness-the-key-to-a-fulfilling-life Quotes to ponder: "Tell your people you love them. Life is so fragile." "Loneliness kills. It's as powerful as smoking or alcoholism." "Social fitness requires taking stock of our relationships, and being honest with ourselves about where we're devoting our time and whether we are tending to the connections that help us thrive." Episode references: The Good Life by Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/705876/the-good-life-by-robert-waldinger-and-marc-schulz/ The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness (TED Talk): https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Welcome to Country Proud Living "Where Nurturing Spaces Empower Your Life and Everyday Feels a Little More Like Home." Friendship in midlife can feel different than it once did.As our lives evolve, children grow up, careers shift, and responsibilities change, many women find themselves longing for deeper connection and meaningful friendships. In this heartfelt episode of Country Proud Living, LoriLynn explores why friendship matters more than ever in this season of life and how creating intentional community can support our emotional, mental, and physical well-being.Through personal stories, research-backed insights, and an exciting announcement about her new Coffee Klatch Connection gatherings, LoriLynn offers gentle encouragement to reach out, gather around the table, and create the kind of friendships that help us feel seen, supported, and understood.
In this milestone 750th episode of Trending in Education, host Mike Palmer takes the podcast on the road to the Harvard Graduate School of Education (HGSE) for the Next Level Lab Spring Learning Summit. Centered on the future of work, workforce learning, and instructional design, this episode features a dynamic series of conversations with emerging researchers and educational innovators who are reimagining how humans learn, lead, and thrive alongside advancing technology. Mike kicks off the celebration by reflecting on the podcast's 750-episode journey, giving a nod to the community, and sharing updates on his latest media projects before diving into a packed poster session at the summit. The episode features five insightful interviews that bridge the gap between human capability and technological innovation. Ruiz Clark from Digital Promise shares his research on the Digital Leadership Convergence Model. He outlines a strategic project working with a large California school district to establish a vision for AI literacy, explaining why educational systems must look past basic technical literacy to completely rethink the purpose of education in an automated world. Palak Chandak and Archana Chaudhary discuss their framework for Humanics Integrated Business Studies (HIBS). They detail an innovative curriculum designed to cultivate durable skills, like communication and critical thinking, highlighting a real-world pilot project that embedded business students within coastal surf schools in India to solve community-driven challenges. Chilean entrepreneur Felipe Vergara Iduya introduces Hestia, an AI-supported framework designed to capture unstructured community evidence—such as peer relationships, behavior patterns, and school climate data—to foster system-level wellbeing within school ecosystems. Beth Sapire examines the intersection of learning and healing. Drawing on adult development theories and constructive developmental psychology, she outlines the systemic conditions necessary for expansive, collective learning within complex organizations. Finally, Sean Snyder and Bill Wisser from the HGSE Teaching and Learning Lab (TLL) break down their design and development process. They discuss the creation of a university-wide data fluency initiative for Harvard staff and explain how they utilized AI voice generation and animation tools to optimize course assets for the Data-Wise Learning Institute. Show References: Running It Back Podcast: Mike's Lessons Learned From Sports podcast with Tarlin Ray. Palm Court Pod: Mike's New College of Florida podcast with Grant Balfour and Megan Citron. Here's the John Oliver piece chronicling the challenges faced by Mike's alma mater. New College Film Project: Learn more about the documentary First They Came For My College directed by Harry Hanbury at newcollegefilm.com. The Convergence Model: Download the paper and view the poster framework developed by Ruiz Clark at theconvergencemodel.com. HGSE Teaching and Learning Lab: Explore the resources, course design support, and institutional projects mentioned by Sean and Bill at tll.gse.harvard.edu. Innovation-ish: Read up on the book by summit host Tessa Forshaw and co-author Rich Braden, a frequent touchstone on the podcast regarding creative confidence. ElevenLabs: Explore the AI voice generation platform utilized by the TLL team to streamline production logistics for simulated learning environments. Adobe Character Animator: Discover the performance-based animation software used to bring the TLL team's simulated teaching avatars to life. Timestamps: 00:00 Milestone 750th Episode Celebration and Welcome 01:54 Introduction to the Next Level Lab Spring Summit at HGSE 05:53 Ruiz Clark on AI Literacy and the Digital Leadership Convergence Model 10:30 Palak Chandak and Archana Chaudhary on Humanics Integrated Business Studies 17:30 Felipe Vergara Iduya on the Hestia Wellbeing Framework 23:30 Beth Sapire on Expansive Learning, Adult Development, and Healing 29:00 Sean Snyder and Bill Wisser on Data Fluency and AI Workflow at the HGSE TLL 35:30 Post-Summit Reflections and Summer Preview Like, Share, and Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts to stay updated on the latest trends in education. Bonus points for writing a review to help us run through the tape all the way to 1,000 episodes!
In Episode 362 of The Real Jason Duncan Podcast, Jason confronts one of the most sincere lies an entrepreneur can believe – that presence, impact, and transformation can wait until later. The business will get there. The margin will come. And then you'll finally show up the way you're supposed to. Later never comes. Jason Duncan has watched this trap play out in the lives of some of the most accomplished entrepreneurs he knows. They're building a legacy. They're just building it for a version of life that doesn't exist yet. And by the time they get there, the people that legacy was supposed to be for have already moved on without them. In this solo Wednesday episode drawn from his What's Real newsletter, Jason exposes the Someday Legacy for the golden cage it is – why deferred presence is a behavioral pattern and not a timing problem, what the longest-running happiness study in human history reveals about what actually matters, and why the transformation required to reach your full impact has to happen now or it won't happen at all. In this episode, Jason covers: Why the most accomplished entrepreneurs keep deferring presence to a finish line that keeps moving The four phases of business metamorphosis – and why almost nobody reaches the only phase where legacy actually gets built What the Harvard Study of Adult Development found after 80 years of research on human happiness and longevity Why postponement is an identity problem, not a scheduling problem The difference between a Someday Legacy and a Living Legacy – and which one is actually happening right now Why the transformation required for phase four can't wait until retirement The four questions worth sitting with today – not someday Why the exit lifestyle isn't the reward at the end of the journey The sincerity of your intentions doesn't make the cage any less real. This episode will help you see the bars you've been calling a blueprint – and start building the legacy that's already overdue.
Too many options isn't freedom. It's paralysis dressed up as possibility. David Epstein, investigative journalist and author of the bestseller Range, is back with a counterintuitive idea: the constraints you've been avoiding might be the exact thing that unlocks your best work. His new book, Inside the Box: How Constraints Make Us Better, makes the case that boundaries don't limit you. They focus you. You'll hear how a company in the early nineties assembled arguably the greatest collection of tech talent ever, had unlimited resources, and still collapsed under the weight of its own options. Meanwhile, two people who left that company with small, focused projects built eBay and the Palm Pilot. The lesson isn't about talent. It's about the bounding box. David introduces his BCS Press Release framework: batch your work so you're not toggling all day, make your commitments visible so you can actually subtract the right ones, use satisficing rules to make decisions without drowning in choices, and write the press release before you start anything, so you know what matters before you're too deep in to see clearly. This conversation also gets personal. David talks about the childhood arm injury that ended his baseball career and pushed him toward running and memory techniques he still uses today. He opens up about forgiveness, about the grudges that are hard to shake, and about the Harvard Study of Adult Development, the longest study of human happiness ever conducted, which concluded that happiness is love. Real relationships. Mutual obligation. The stuff you keep forgetting to schedule. David's socials: Website Instagram X David's books: Inside the Box: How Constraints Make Us Better Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World The Sports Gene: Inside the Science of Extraordinary Athletic Performance In this episode you will: Discover why having too many options can kill your creativity and how the psychology of the path of least resistance explains it Learn the BCS Press Release framework for batching work, making commitments visible, and using satisficing rules to stay focused Understand the difference between kind and wicked learning environments and why the 10,000-hour rule only applies to one of them Explore what MIT, Northwestern, and Census Bureau research reveals about the average age of fast-growing startup founders and why late bloomers have an edge Apply the subtractive neglect bias and the subtraction game to cut commitments and create more clarity in your work and relationships For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1932 For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960 Follow The Daily Motivation for essential highlights from The School of Greatness More SOG episodes we think you'll love: Lewis Howes Solo [5-Step Mental Reprogramming Process] Emma Grede Kevin Love TOPICS David Epstein, Inside the Box, Range, constraints and creativity, BCS Press Release framework, kind vs. wicked learning environments, 10000-hour rule, Harvard Study of Adult Development, satisficing rules, subtractive neglect bias Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy!Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
In episode 358 of The Real Jason Duncan Podcast, we have the Anniversary Audit, and if you're an entrepreneur who has ever pointed to the business as proof that you love your family, this one is going to be uncomfortable in the best possible way. Jason Duncan has been married to his wife, Kristie, for 31 years as of today. And for too many of those years, he confused paying the bills with showing up. This Wednesday, a solo episode, part of the weekly What's Real? Series, strips down one of the most invisible golden cages in an entrepreneurial man's life: the good provider myth. Nobody hands you this lie directly. It comes from culture, from the language around "taking care of your family," from the unspoken math that says revenue equals love and a nice house equals a good life. And because the business was actually growing, it was easy to keep pointing to it as evidence. This episode is a reckoning with what that actually costs, and four honest questions every entrepreneurial husband needs to sit with before later runs out. This episode dives into: 1. Why the good provider myth is one of the most dangerous golden cages an entrepreneurial man can build 2. How Jason used financial provision as an unconscious transaction — and never asked Kristie to sign the contract 3. The Harvard Study of Adult Development — 80+ years of data on what actually predicts well-being and longevity (it's not wealth) 4. What Kristie has actually wanted for 31 years — and why it has nothing to do with money 5. Why entrepreneurship trains you to be bad at the one thing your marriage needs most: presence 6. Why time is the only non-renewable resource — and what it means when you trade it for revenue 7. How presence compounds over 30 years the same way money does — and what happens to couples who keep deferring it 8. The Anniversary Audit: four questions every entrepreneur should stop asking only once a year 9. The difference between being in the room and actually being in the room 10. Proverbs 18:22 and what it actually demands. Beyond the altar 11. Why the gold is always the lie, and why the most admirable-looking cages are the hardest to see If you've built something impressive and still feel the distance growing, send this episode to the person in your life who needs to hear it before it runs out.
Hosts: Dale Johnson and Maggie Stauffer Guests: Taylor Blackwell and Heather Nelson This episode explores the critical link between socialization and longevity through various scientific lenses. The hosts discuss a Brigham Young University study highlighting social integration as the primary predictor of a long life, even surpassing exercise or diet. They also examine the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which concludes that strong, warm relationships are more vital to health and happiness than wealth or fame. Additionally, a resident social worker presents data showing that continuing care retirement communities significantly reduce frailty and hospitalizations by fostering these essential connections. Finally, the program highlights how structured activities like clubs, communal dining, and concerts create an environment that combats isolation and supports long-term well-being. Here are a few links: https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_pinker_the_secret_to_living_longer_may_be_your_social_life https://www.whereyoulivematters.org/resources/health-benefits-of-senior-living-insights-from-the-latest-norc-study/?utm_source=chatgpt.com Check out our podcast episode #34: A Very Social Place
Send us Fan MailYou sent the text. You waited. Two days passed and nothing. And your brain went straight to the worst possible explanation.That spiral is not a character flaw. It is what happens when a deeper belief is running in the background: the belief that you do not quite belong. And when that belief is active, even the smallest social interactions can feel loaded. Not texting back becomes rejection. A short response becomes evidence. A friend who moves away becomes proof that closeness does not last.This week, Sami and Angela get honest about why adult friendships are so much harder to build than they should be, what the research says about why relationships are literally keeping us alive, and the invisible cycle that keeps lonely people lonelier. They dig into the concept of "bids for attachment," the poker chip theory of connection, and why the fear of rejection is not just about the other person rejecting you. In this episode, they get into:Why the stories we tell about an unanswered text reveal more about our beliefs than the other person's behaviorThe clinical concept of "bids for attachment" and how it explains why reaching out can feel like a gamblePermission to grieve a friendship that changed, even when no one did anything wrongTwo friendship skills worth actually practicing: curiosity and remembering the detailsWhy deciding you want a different kind of connection is the actual first stepAngela shares a story from 28 years ago about a moment at church that has stuck with her ever since: a friend who thought she was being cold, and the person who quietly redirected her toward what was actually going on. Sami gets personal about the friendship she built with her next-door neighbor during a hard season of early motherhood, what it felt like when that friend moved to Colorado, and why she still thinks the risk of closeness is worth it every single time.If you have ever found yourself waiting for someone else to go first, or telling yourself you are just not a person who makes friends easily, this episode is for you. It is not about being more extroverted. It is about deciding what you actually want and then going toward it on purpose.Press play. You are more belongable than you think.Mentioned in this episode:The Harvard Study of Adult Development (longest running study on happiness and relationships)The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins (coming up next episode): melrobbins.com/book/the-let-them-theory/Be Freaking Awesome book by Angela BelfordBFA Episode 23 (abandonment issues and attachment): bfreakingawesome.com/ep23Support the showSign up at bfreakingawesome.com to get the latest news, insights, and episodes straight to your inbox.Follow Be Freaking Awesome on Facebook, LinkedIn, Youtube, and Instagram.Let us know what questions you want to be answered and discussed by emailing us at podcast@bfreakingawesome.com.
Dr. Marc Schulz and his co-author Dr. Robert Waldinger lead the Harvard Study of Adult Development: ongoing research into the psychosocial predictors of healthy aging that began in 1938. In 2023, Dr. Schulz and Dr. Waldinger published The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness. Chicago broadcast journalist Jerome McDonnell sits down with Dr. Schulz to discuss the study's origins, its evolving methods, and the importance of social connection.
In our March 22 Sunday gathering we kick off a new series about relationships. This week's Reflection Questions are below: 1. Who are your closet relationships? Who do you have the most strained relationships with? 2. The Harvard Study of Adult Development shows that relationships are the strongest predictor of a healthy life. Do your current priorities reflect that—or is something else taking their place? 3. Peter Scazzero says you cannot be spiritually mature and emotionally immature. Where do you see a gap between what you believe spiritually and how you relate to people? 4. When you think about “spiritual maturity,” what do you instinctively measure— knowledge, behavior, or relationships? How might God be redefining that for you? 5. Jesus teaches that loving God and loving others are inseparable (Matthew 22:37– 39). Who in your life is currently hardest to love well—and why? 6. Genesis says it is “not good” for humans to be alone. Where in your life are you experiencing isolation—physically, emotionally, or spiritually? 7. Think about your closest relationships (family, friends, coworkers). Would those people describe you as loving, patient, and present? Why or why not? 8. In what ways have convenience, busyness, or technology made your relationships more shallow? What is one intentional step you could take this week to deepen a relationship? 9. If your spiritual maturity were evaluated only by the health of your relationships, what would need to change starting today?
Are you feeling lonely even though you are busy? Wondering where your friendships went when life got so full? This solo episode explores why friendship in midlife is not a luxury but essential to your health and longevity, and gives you five practical ways to build the connections that will carry you into the next chapter of your life.In this deeply personal solo episode, Gabriella Espinosa shares the story of gathering friends from across the country at her home in Austin for South by Southwest to celebrate turning 60. That weekend reminded her that connection is everything, and sparked this research backed conversation about friendship, loneliness, and health in midlife. This episode is a reminder that friendship in midlife does not happen by accident. It is something we choose, tend to, and create with intention.Highlights from our discussion include:The Harvard Study of Adult Development discovered how your relationships at age 50 can predict how healthy you will be at age 80. Recent AARP research shows that four in ten US adults age 45 and older report feeling lonely. Why nurturing relationships is as critical to health as eating well and exercising.Five practical approaches for building meaningful friendships in midlife.How some of Gabriella's most meaningful friendships today started on social media.If this episode resonated with you, send it to one woman you care about. Not as a forward, but as an act of friendship. That is how we build community, one conversation at a time.Resources Mentioned:Harvard Study of Adult Development https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.orgAARP Loneliness & Social Connections Study 2025 (primary) https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/social-leisure/relationships/loneliness-social-connections-2025/AARP: Instagram | Website The Riveter: Instagram: @theriveterco → theriveterco.comEntreprenistas: Instagram @entreprenistas→ entreprenistas.comMidlife Collective: Instagram @mlifecollectiveLizzie Bermudez Walk & Talk San Francisco: Instagram @lizziebtvCONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA:InstagramLinkedInWork with Gabriella! Full episodes on YouTube.The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.
My grandfather was six foot four. Always in a suit. Captain in the US Air Force. A man of very few words. Throughout his entire life, he never once told my father that he loved him. Not once. That silence — the gap between what we feel and what we express — is the central wound of our time. In this episode, I share the story at the heart of my book RESONANCE: what happened when my father decided to break a generational cycle of unspoken love, what my grandfather did with a napkin that said everything his words couldn't, and what I found in my father's desk years later during his final days. I also explore what Dr. Matthew Lieberman's research at UCLA reveals about why this matters neurologically — how social pain activates the same brain circuits as physical pain, why the Surgeon General has declared loneliness equivalent to smoking fifteen cigarettes a day, and why the Harvard Study of Adult Development found that relationship quality predicts health and longevity more powerfully than diet, exercise, or genetics. This is not about self-improvement. This is about the question most of us are afraid to ask: can you let someone all the way in? RESONANCE: The Art and Science of Human Connection publishes May 5, 2026 with BenBella Books / Simon & Schuster. Pre-order at resonance.biz Michael Trainer has spent 30 years learning from Nobel laureates, neuroscientists, and wisdom keepers worldwide. He's the author of RESONANCE: The Art and Science of Human Connection (March 31, 2026), co-creator of Global Citizen and the Global Citizen Festival, and host of the RESONANCE podcast.Featured in Forbes, Inc, Good Morning America. Follow on YouTube
Send a textWellness is a word we hear all the time—but what does it actually mean when life is complicated, busy, and sometimes overwhelming? In this milestone 200th episode, I explore the idea that living well isn't about perfection or rigid routines, but about the small choices we make every day that quietly shape our health, our relationships, and the direction of our lives. I invite you to reflect on the emotions you're choosing from, the responsibilities you're carrying, and the possibility that wellness might be closer than you think. If you've ever wondered how to care for yourself while managing a full and demanding life, this conversation might open a new perspective on what it truly means to live well.Quotes of the Week“Well-being is realized by small steps, but is truly no small thing.” — Zeno “The part can never be well unless the whole is well.” — Plato CitationsCohen, S., Janicki-Deverts, D., & Miller, G. E. (2012). Psychological stress and disease. JAMA.Lee, I. M., et al. (2019). Association of Step Volume and Intensity With All-Cause Mortality in Older Women. JAMA Internal Medicine.Waldinger, R., & Schulz, M. Harvard Study of Adult Development. Harvard Medical School.National Institutes of Health – Your Healthiest Self: Wellness Toolkits. Let's go, let's get it done. Get more information at: http://projectweightloss.org
The Harvard Study of Adult Development, often referred to as the Grant Study, is widely recognized as the longest-running, in-depth scientific study of adult life ever conducted. I recently published an episode I did with the director, Robert Waldinger. The results of the study have now famously shown us that what most fulfills us in life is relationships. Of course not just any relationships, but the truly valuable and significant relationships of our lives. It's proven very difficult to have such relationships, if we can't effectively communicate with others. And by effectively communicate, we mean to actually connect in a meaningful way. So in this episode I bring you Renée Marino. Renée is a renowned Broadway star, singing, acting, and dancing in West Side Story, Pretty Woman, and Jersey Boys. Her lead role in Jersey Boys caught the eye of famed actor Clint Eastwood who took her from the stage and cast her for the lead female role in his film, Jersey Boys. Renée's livelihood is communicating. She must connect with and move the audience, and she's a master. Following Clint's film, Renée turned her attention to the professional and personal world and is showing us the heart and skill of real communication. The kind that does just what Renée does on stage, on film, and in her personal life...truly connects us with others in a meaningful way that moves them to engage with us. I connected with Renée so much I had her come back and co-host a bunch of episodes with me, we co-presented at a speaking event together, and became good friends. Renée has culminated her methodology of communicating in her book, Becoming a Master Communicator: Balancing New School Technology with Old School Simplicity, which you can get anywhere and just search for Renée Marino and you'll find her everywhere. Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In this episode, Jason and Emily break down the famous 85-year Harvard Study on Adult Development, the one that followed people for decades to figure out what actually makes for a good life. It turns out it's not just money or success, but relationships, purpose, stress, habits, and how you handle conflict over time. Naturally, instead of calmly reflecting on this like mature adults, they ranked themselves and each other on a scale of 1–10 in several of the study's core areas. The result is equal parts thoughtful, competitive, revealing, and mildly dangerous for a marriage. If you've ever wondered how you'd score in the “good life” department, this episode might make you want to find out. Musicbed License MB01LB14RC1PRTN MB01LPNLPFWSBVO Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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I sit down with leadership thinker and complexity expert Jennifer Garvey Berger to explore what leadership really looks like in an anxious, fast-changing world. We dig into mind traps, adult development, and why leading today isn't about having the answers, but building the capacity to work with complexity, uncertainty, and multiple perspectives. We talk about the breakdown of trust in institutions and leaders, how anxiety shrinks our circles of trust, and why people often look for strong or even bullying figures when they feel powerless. Jennifer explains adult developmental stages in practical terms - how we move from external validation to internal authority to deeper wisdom - and what coaches and leaders can actually do to grow. We get into reflection, getting off autopilot, and the key developmental move of turning judgment into self-inquiry. We also explore big cultural swings - from postmodern fragmentation to a possible "re-enchantment" of meaning - and ask whether current global pressures will push us into regression or growth. We finish with the role of community, love, and intentional relationship, including Jennifer's experiment living in a shared house in France, and why real development happens in connection, not isolation. Read more about Jennifer's work here: https://www.cultivatingleadership.com/team-member/jennifer-garvey-berger ----------------------------------------------- Become a certified embodiment coach. Coach beyond mere words and support clients to transform their lives: https://embodimentunlimited.com/cec/ ----------------------------------------------- Join our membership program for coaches, facilitators, therapists and educators who want sustainable growth: https://embodimentunlimited.com/flourish/ ----------------------------------------------- Check out our YouTube channel for more coaching tips and our Podcast channel for full episode videos Uplevel your coaching with a free copy of Mark's latest eBook, The Top 12 Embodiment Coaching Techniques Join Mark for those juicy in-person workshops and events Fancy some free coaching demo sessions with Mark? Connect with Mark Walsh on Instagram
Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, shares insights from the world's longest study on happiness, tracking over 2,500 people since 1938. The core finding: A good life comes from caring for your body and relationships, as warm connections predict health and longevity better than cholesterol levels at midlife. Privilege doesn't guarantee happiness, as inner-city participants matched Harvard men in well-being.Guest Introduction:Dr. Waldinger is a Harvard Medical School professor, psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, and Zen master who directs the 85+ year Harvard Study. His TED Talk has over 50 million views, and he co-authored The Good Life with Marc Schulz, distilling study lessons on connection. He teaches meditation globally and psychotherapy at Mass General Hospital.Connect With Guest:Website: robertwaldinger.com Book: The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.TED Talk: "What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness".LinkedIn: Robert WaldingerWhat to do next: Click to grab our free guide, 10 Key Issues to Consider as You Explore Your Retirement Transition Please leave a review at Apple Podcasts. Join our Revolutionize Your Retirement group on Facebook.
I want to start off by asking a question I continually interest myself with. Do we really want to be happy? If I survey the culture, it looks like we very much want happy moments. The little jolts of dopamine from entertainment, food, drugs and such. But do we really want deep and abiding happiness in our souls? Because if we do, then our primary interest would be in relationships. But not just any relationships. I'm revisiting a conversation I had with Robert Waldinger. Robert is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital which has been going on for 87 years. His devotion is on what most equates to human happiness, and the answer is, relationships. But let me point out that Robert himself is a Zen master and teaches meditation around the world. Which is a focus on what I feel is our first and most important relationship. The relationship with ourselves. I have continued to grow in appreciation, not just for the message, but for Robert himself. If you have my book, What Drives You, you'll see his endorsement. Roberts book, which is how I came to know of him, is, The Good Life: Lessons From the World's Longest Scientific Study on Happiness. And you type in, “Robert Waldinger TED” you will find his TED talk, titled, What Makes A Good Life, that between postings on both YouTube and TED has over 80 million views. Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In this episode Mark speaks with Professor Bob Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, about what 85 years of research reveal about happiness. They explore how close relationships, generosity, attention, and purpose strongly influence both emotional well‑being and physical health. Bob offers practical tips - reach out to someone you miss, practice “social fitness,” cultivate radical curiosity in familiar relationships, and join shared activities or volunteering - to build a more meaningful, happier life at any age.
We’ve been teaching kids resilience all wrong. If you’ve ever watched your child fall apart over homework, friendships, or an impossibly messy bedroom - this episode reframes everything you think you know about “being strong.” Resilience isn’t grit.It isn’t white-knuckling.And it definitely isn’t doing it alone. Justin and Kylie unpack the powerful truth backed by decades of research: resilience is relational — and what our kids need most when they’re struggling is us, closer than ever. KEY POINTS Why “tough it out” parenting quietly backfires The research that proves one relationship can change a child’s life How support builds competence (not dependence) What to do in the moment when your child feels overwhelmed Why moving closer is the most powerful parenting move you can make QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Resilience isn’t doing it alone. It’s knowing you’re not alone while you do it.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Nine Ways to a Resilient Child — Justin Coulson Emmy Werner’s Kauai Longitudinal Study Harvard Study of Adult Development happyfamilies.com.au ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS When your child is struggling, move closer — not further away Sit with them instead of fixing it for them Break big tasks into tiny, doable steps Let your voice become the calm they borrow Model asking for help — it teaches strength, not weakness See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Send us a textThere are moments in life when you realize — very clearly — who and what is holding you up. This week, I found myself thinking deeply about the people who show up quietly, consistently, and without needing anything in return. And it made me reflect on how much of what weighs us down isn't physical at all — it's emotional, and relational.This episode is an invitation to look at relationships differently. Not through the lens of fixing, forcing, or holding on tighter — but through honesty, acceptance, and relief. If you've ever felt exhausted by relationships, confused by love, or curious about what truly helps us feel lighter — this one is for you.References1. Waldinger, R. J., & Schulz, M. S. (2010). What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness. Harvard Study of Adult Development, Harvard Medical School.2. Waldinger, R. J. (2015). What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness. TED Talk. Harvard University.3. Holt-Lunstad, J., Smith, T. B., Baker, M., Harris, T., & Stephenson, D. (2015). Loneliness and social isolation as risk factors for mortality: A meta-analytic review. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 10(2), 227–237.4. Gottman, J. M., & Levenson, R. W. (2000). The timing of divorce: Predicting when a couple will divorce over a 14-year period. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(3), 737–745.5. Beck, J. S. (2011). Cognitive behavior therapy: Basics and beyond (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.6. Gross, J. J. (2015). Emotion regulation: Current status and future prospects. Psychological Inquiry, 26(1), 1–26.Let's go, let's get it done. Get more information at: http://projectweightloss.org
In this video, I share what dementia caregivers need most...and it's probably not what you've been told. This insight comes from the longest study ever conducted on human health and wellbeing: the Harvard Study on Adult Development, which followed people for more than 85 years. What researchers found challenges common assumptions about success, strength, and resilience. I break down what the science actually says, why this matters so much for caregivers in the middle of dementia care, and how connection and emotional safety play a powerful role in both caregiver health and dementia care outcomes. Read about the study here: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/ If you're feeling stretched thin, disconnected, or unsure how to keep going long term, this video will help you reframe what truly supports you, and your loved one, as the journey continues. Get free weekly tools and tips in my newsletter, The Dementia Dose here: https://tinyurl.com/dementiadose-yt
Welcome to episode #1019 of Thinking With Mitch Joel (formerly Six Pixels of Separation). At a time when leadership is being tested less by strategy and more by inner capacity, clarity of judgment and emotional steadiness, the work of Muriel Wilkins stands out for its insistence that progress begins from the inside out. Muriel is an executive coach, CEO of Paravis Partners, and a trusted advisor to senior leaders navigating complexity at the highest levels of organizations, drawing on more than two decades of experience working with C-suite executives and high-potential leaders. A Harvard Business School graduate with a background in consulting and corporate leadership, she brings uncommon credibility to the often-abstract world of coaching, pairing business fluency with deep insight into human behavior, adult development and decision-making under pressure. Her book, Leadership Unblocked - Break Through The Beliefs That Limit Your Potential, distills years of coaching practice into a clear-eyed examination of the unconscious beliefs that quietly constrain leaders, revealing how assumptions about control, certainty, identity and responsibility shape (and often limit) how leaders respond to challenge. Rather than offering tactical fixes or performative confidence, Muriel's work focuses on expanding a leader's capacity to hold complexity, see multiple options and respond with intention rather than reflex. She explores how leaders mature over time, why success can actually stall growth, and how unexamined beliefs turn everyday pressure into unnecessary suffering. Her perspective reframes leadership development as adult development, emphasizing that the ability to lead others sustainably depends on a leader's willingness to do their own internal work. In an era defined by uncertainty, generational shifts and accelerating technology, Muriel's thinking argues for a quieter but more demanding form of leadership... one rooted in self-awareness, discernment and the courage to question one's own mental models before attempting to change anyone else's. Enjoy the conversation… Running time: 52:33. Hello from beautiful Montreal. Listen and subscribe over at Apple Podcasts. Listen and subscribe over at Spotify. Please visit and leave comments on the blog - Thinking With Mitch Joel. Feel free to connect to me directly on LinkedIn. Check out ThinkersOne. Here is my conversation with Muriel Wilkins. Leadership Unblocked - Break Through The Beliefs That Limit Your Potential. Paravis Partner. Coaching Real Leaders Podcast. Follow Muriel on Instagram. Follow Muriel on LinkedIn. Chapters: (00:00) - Introduction to Executive Coaching. (02:13) - The Journey to Coaching. (05:26) - Common Themes in Leadership. (07:37) - The Evolution of Executive Coaching. (10:50) - Leadership as Coaching. (11:49) - Generational Shifts in Leadership. (15:08) - Adult Development and Leadership. (17:57) - The Illusion of Status. (20:55) - Authenticity in Leadership. (24:42) - Adult Development Theory in Practice. (26:41) - Understanding Adult Development Theory. (30:04) - The Evolution of Coaching Practices. (32:12) - Shifting Perspectives on Leadership. (34:53) - The Role of AI in Leadership. (39:47) - Discernment and Decision-Making in Leadership. (47:44) - Navigating Current Challenges in Leadership.
We all want to be happy and live a good life but how do we actually get there? It's a big question, and one that most of us don't have a clear answer to. This episode will help you find your happiest self.In fact, we're often told that money, status and success are the keys to happiness. But according to professor and psychiatrist Dr Robert Waldinger, we've been getting it wrong.Dr Waldinger is the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, the longest-running study on happiness ever conducted. I was so excited to sit down with him to discuss what more than 85 years of research reveals about living a good life and how we can all make this year the happiest year of our lives - starting now.We cover:What really matters for long-term happinessHow to live a happy lifeWhy loneliness is one of the biggest threats to our wellbeingWhat we get wrong about happiness and how to get it rightThe most common unhealthy traits in our relationshipsSimple ways to meet people and make meaningful connectionsThis conversation will leave you feeling hopeful and give you a renewed appreciation for the people in your life.Dr Robert Waldinger is Great Company.Learn more about Dr Waldinger's book 'The Good Life ' HEREIf you enjoyed the show, you can also follow us: Instagram- @greatcompanypodcastTikTok - @greatcompanypodcast And if you've got thoughts, questions and comments, you can email us at: greatcompany@jampotproductions.co.uk THE CREDITS Executive Producers: Ewan Newbigging-Lister & Jemima RathboneProducer: Helen BurkeAssistant Producer: Issy Weeks-HankinsVideo: Jake Ji & Ryley KirbySocial Media: Laura Coughlan & Anthony Barter Great Company is an original podcast from JamPot Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Have you ever looked at people who seem to have figured it out? They're in their sixties, seventies, or eighties, and they're healthy. They're happy. They're in great relationships. And you think, "what do they know that I don't?" Guess what? We don't have to wonder anymore. The Harvard Study of Adult Development is the longest longitudinal study ever done on physical and emotional well-being. Over 80 years, researchers tracked people across their entire lives to answer one question: what actually makes life feel good? The results were surprising: The quality of your relationships is the number one predictor of your mental health, your physical health, and your overall life satisfaction. It isn't money, success, fame, productivity, or hustling harder. It's not achieving some perfect version of yourself. On today's episode, I'm sharing some objective ways you can make your life happier and healthier, according to 80 years of research. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/795
Send us a textIn this insightful episode, Andy connects with Hadleigh Fisher—founder of the Resilience Agenda and passionate advocate for mental fitness—to explore practical strategies and mindsets for thriving in today's fast-paced world.Key Takeaways:Redefining Mental Health: Hadleigh explains why mental health is a continuum for everyone, not just those in crisis. Learn the difference between mental health and mental illness, and why thinking in terms of "mental fitness" is a game-changer.Personal Stories: Both Andy and Hadleigh share candid stories of family and personal struggles, highlighting the importance of resilience, agency, and self-compassion.Mental Fitness Toolkit: Discover the foundations of mental fitness—movement, nutrition, sleep, connection, and mindset—and how small daily habits can make a big difference.Connection Matters: The episode explores powerful research (including the Harvard Study of Adult Development) showing that strong relationships and community are key predictors of long-term well-being.Practical Skills: Listeners get actionable advice on habits, goal setting, the importance of journaling, and skills like active constructive responding to strengthen relationships.Leader Insights: For those in leadership, find out how autonomy, competence, and relatedness play a role in motivation and performance.Tools & Resources: Hear about the Resilience Agenda's highly-rated planners, their 28-day “Mental Fitness Reset” course, and the free “Mental Fitness 3-2-1” newsletter.Fresh Goal Setting: Hadleigh introduces the idea of “new month resolutions,” empowering you to reset and grow every 30 days, not just once a year.Why Listen? If you want to move beyond surviving to thriving—or if you're a leader, parent, or simply someone interested in practical, research-backed well-being—this episode is packed with stories, science, and tools you can use right away. I hope you share this episode with anyone who you feel will benefit from listening. Connect With HadleighWebsite NewsLetter LinkedIn Facebook
What if the secret to living a long, healthy, vibrant life has nothing to do with your exercise routine, your diet, or even your genetics?What if everything we've been told about wellness is missing the most important piece?After nearly a century of research—tracking over 1,500 people from adolescence through old age—Harvard scientists discovered something that changes everything we thought we knew about health and longevity.And it's simpler than you think. More accessible than any biohacking protocol. And it's been right in front of us all along.In this episode, Melissa Peters breaks down the groundbreaking findings from the longest scientific study on human health ever conducted—and what it means for how you should actually be living your life.What You'll Learn in This Episode:✨ The Harvard Study of Adult Development ✨ The #1 predictor of your physical health at age 80 ✨ Why we're living in a loneliness epidemic ✨ The shocking health impact of chronic loneliness ✨ How relationships literally rewire your biology ✨ 5 shifts to build relationships that sustain you✨ Why your romantic relationship impacts your health This episode is for anyone who:Has been prioritizing their physical health but neglecting their relationshipsFeels more isolated or lonely than they'd like to admitWonders why wellness routines aren't making them feel truly fulfilledWants to understand what actually creates a long, healthy, vibrant lifeIs ready to invest in their relationships the way they invest in their bodiesCraves deeper connection but doesn't know where to startFeels like they're "too busy" for meaningful relationships (and wants to shift that)If you've been optimizing your body but starving your soul—this is your wake-up call.Research & Resources Mentioned:The Harvard Study of Adult Development "The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness"Blue Zones ResearchConnect with Melissa:✨ Instagram: @IAmMelissaPeters
Today's guests are both passionate about spreading the crucial message that high-quality relationships are one of the biggest predictors of happiness, health, and longevity. Feel Better Live More Bitesize is my weekly podcast for your mind, body, and heart. Each week I'll be featuring inspirational stories and practical tips from some of my former guests. Today's clip is from episode 364 of the podcast with co-authors of The Good Life: Lessons From The World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness – Professors Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz. They are directors of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, an extraordinary research project that began in 1938 and has followed participants for more than eight decades. In this clip, they explain why nurturing high-quality relationships may be one of the most powerful things we can do to support both our long-term health and our happiness. By the end of today's episode, I'm pretty sure you'll feel inspired to reconnect with an old friend, phone that family member you don't see enough of, or make plans for a face-to-face get-together. You'll feel happier, and even be healthier, if you do because the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives. Thanks to our sponsor https://drinkag1.com/livemore Show notes and the full podcast are available at https://drchatterjee.com/364 Support the podcast and enjoy Ad-Free episodes. Try FREE for 7 days on Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/feelbetterlivemore For other podcast platforms go to https://fblm.supercast.com. DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast and on this webpage is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 3205: Ryan Frederick challenges the longevity obsession by emphasizing healthspan, the years lived with vitality and purpose, as the smarter, more fulfilling investment. He reveals how daily lifestyle choices, social connections, and even where we live play a far greater role than genetics in shaping our well-being, and how prioritizing health now can extend not just life but also financial security and quality of life. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.here.life/blog/invest-in-healthspan Quotes to ponder: "A longer life is only a true gift if it's also a healthier one." "Strong relationships are the single best predictor of health and happiness across the lifespan." "Like financial investing, health rewards those who start early, stay consistent, and think long-term." Episode references: 2023 Genworth Cost of Care Survey: https://www.genworth.com/aging-and-you/finances/cost-of-care.html The Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 3205: Ryan Frederick challenges the longevity obsession by emphasizing healthspan, the years lived with vitality and purpose, as the smarter, more fulfilling investment. He reveals how daily lifestyle choices, social connections, and even where we live play a far greater role than genetics in shaping our well-being, and how prioritizing health now can extend not just life but also financial security and quality of life. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.here.life/blog/invest-in-healthspan Quotes to ponder: "A longer life is only a true gift if it's also a healthier one." "Strong relationships are the single best predictor of health and happiness across the lifespan." "Like financial investing, health rewards those who start early, stay consistent, and think long-term." Episode references: 2023 Genworth Cost of Care Survey: https://www.genworth.com/aging-and-you/finances/cost-of-care.html The Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Living alone may be difficult, but what about dying alone? Physicians and nurses are the new priests accompanying people as they face death. But the experience of nursing homes, assisted living, and palliative wards are often some of the loneliest spaces in human culture.“He said, ‘Someone finally saw me. I've been in this hospital for 20 years and I didn't think anyone ever saw me.'”This episode is part 5 of a series, SOLO, which explores the theological, moral, and psychological dimensions of loneliness, solitude, and being alone.In this episode, Columbia physician and medical ethicist Lydia Dugdale joins Macie Bridge to reflect on loneliness, solitude, and what it means to die—and live—well. Drawing from her clinical work in New York City and the years of research and experience that went into her book The Lost Art of Dying, Dugdale exposes a crisis of unrepresented patients dying alone, the loss of communal care, and medicine's discomfort with mortality.She recalls the medieval Ars Moriendi tradition, where dying was intentionally communal, and explores how virtue and community sustain a good death. Together they discuss solitude as restorative rather than fearful, loneliness as a modern epidemic, and the sacred responsibility of seeing one another deeply. With stories from her patients and her own reflections on family, COVID isolation, and faith, Dugdale illuminates how medicine, mortality, and moral imagination converge on one truth: to die well, we must learn to live well … together.Helpful Links and ResourcesThe Lost Art of Dying: Reviving Forgotten Wisdom by Lydia S. DugdalePew Research Center Study on Loneliness (2025)Harvard Study of Adult Development on LonelinessEpisode Highlights“If you want to die well, you have to live well.”“Community doesn't appear out of nowhere at the bedside.”“He said, ‘Someone finally saw me. I've been in this hospital for 20 years and I didn't think anyone ever saw me.'”“We are social creatures. Human beings are meant to be in relationship.”“Solitude, just like rest or Sabbath, is something all of us need.”About Lydia DugdaleLydia S. Dugdale, MD, MAR is a physician and medical ethicist at Columbia University, where she serves as Professor of Medicine and Director of the Center for Clinical Medical Ethics. She is the author of The Lost Art of Dying: Reviving Forgotten Wisdom and a leading voice on virtue ethics, mortality, and human flourishing in medicine.Show NotesLoneliness, Solitude, and the CityNew York's “unrepresented” patients—those who have no one to make decisions for them.The phenomenon of people “surrounded but unseen” in urban life.“I have a loving family … but I never see them.”Medicine and the PandemicLoneliness intensified during COVID-19: patients dying alone under strict hospital restrictions.Dugdale's reflections on balancing social responsibility with human connection.“We are social creatures. Human beings are meant to be in relationship.”Technology, Fear, and the Online Shadow CommunityPost-pandemic isolation worsened by online echo chambers.One in five adults reports loneliness—back to pre-pandemic levels.The Lost Art of DyingMedieval Ars Moriendi: learning to die well by living well.Virtue and community as the foundation for a good death.“If you don't want to die an impatient, bitter, despairing old fool, then you need to practice hope and patience and joy.”Modern Medicine's Fear of DeathPhysicians unpracticed—and afraid—to talk about mortality.“Doctors themselves are afraid to talk about death.”How palliative care both helps and distances doctors from mortality.Community and MortalityThe man who reconnected with his estranged children after reading The Lost Art of Dying.“He said, ‘I want my kids there when I die.'”Living well so that dying isn't lonely.Programs of Connection and the Body of ChristVolunteer models, day programs, and mutual care as small restorations of community.“The more we commit to others, the more others commit back to us.”Solitude and the Human SpiritDistinguishing solitude, loneliness, and social isolation.Solitude as restorative and necessary: “All of us need solitude. It's a kind of rest.”The contemplative life as vital for engagement with the world.Death, Autonomy, and CommunityThe limits of “my death, my choice.”The communal role in death: “We should have folks at our deathbeds.”Medieval parish customs of accompanying the dying.Seeing and Being SeenA patient long thought impossible to care for says, “Someone finally saw me.”Seeing others deeply as moral and spiritual work.“How can we see each other and connect in a meaningful way?”Production NotesThis podcast featured Lydia DugdaleInterview by Macie BridgeEdited and Produced by Evan RosaHosted by Evan RosaProduction Assistance by Alexa Rollow, Emily Brookfield, and Hope ChunA Production of the Yale Center for Faith & Culture at Yale Divinity School https://faith.yale.edu/aboutSupport For the Life of the World podcast by giving to the Yale Center for Faith & Culture: https://faith.yale.edu/give
Join us on this engaging episode of the Do Good to Lead Well podcast, where we explore the fascinating journey of Dr. Michael Nevarez, a highly respected psychiatrist and leadership coach. His insights, drawn from his work as the assistant director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, underscore the importance of continuous personal and leadership growth, integrating scientific research into practical tools for leaders.Listen in as we explore the art of delivering effective feedback, a crucial skill for any leader. The conversation highlights the challenges leaders face in maintaining a delicate balance between fostering growth and preserving positive relationships. Discover the significance of providing feedback that is behaviorally anchored, utilizing specific and neutral information to avoid performance declines. Dr. Nevarez shares strategies like the "push" and "pull" phases, where clarity and curiosity play pivotal roles in understanding and addressing underlying issues. By focusing on clear communication and open dialogue, leaders can better navigate the intricacies of feedback, differentiating between problems such as time management and prioritization.The episode also unpacks techniques such as affect labeling and perspective checking, emphasizing the role of psychological safety in successful implementation. Discover how managing emotions in feedback conversations can avoid common pitfalls like fundamental attribution error, utilizing tools like contrast statements to reduce perceived threats and promote constructive dialogue. If you're looking for actionable tools and scripts for creating meaningful, growth-oriented feedback conversations, this conversation is a must-listen.What You'll Learn- The secrets of the art of feedback.- How to master the powerful STEP communication framework.- Ways to create environments of psychological safety.- Managing emotions in feedback conversations.- Balancing candor with impact.Podcast Timestamps(00:00) – The Art and Science of Leadership Development(08:16) – Navigating the “Push” and “Pull” of Feedback Conversations(23:21) – Watch Your STEP: A Powerful Framework for Effective Communication(40:33) - Managing Emotions in Feedback ConversationsKEYWORDSPositive Leadership, The Art of Meaningful Conversation, Leadership Development, Effective Feedback, Communication Framework, STEP, Psychological Safety, Behaviorally Anchored Feedback, Curiosity, Personal Growth, Fostering Accountability, Clear Expectations, Constructive Dialogue, CEO Success
What does the future of coaching look like… and what can we learn from those who helped build it?Ruth Rochelle returns to The Coach's Journey Podcast to reflect on how the coaching world has evolved over the past four decades and where it might be heading next.Prompted by a listener's question, Ruth shares stories from the early days of coaching - when it was more movement than industry - through the professionalisation of the 1990s to today's fast-changing, tech-enabled landscape. Alongside the history, she offers her vision for what's emerging now: deeper work, greater humanity, and a renewed sense of trust.Ruth and Joey explore how coaching has shifted from performance to presence, from achievement to wholeness, and from certainty to curiosity. They discuss scepticism in the early days (and now), the rise of coaching bodies such as the ICF and EMCC, the impact of technology and AI, and why compassion and simplicity remain at the heart of great coaching.In this episode, Ruth talks about:Why the earliest coaching approaches focused on the inner game and self-beliefHow the field grew from informal practice to global professionThe evolution from performance and achievement to whole-person coachingWhy trust, compassion, and presence still matter most for coaches todayRuth also invites every coach to listen inwardly and lead the way forward for the profession. If you've ever wondered how the coaching profession began - or where it's going next - this conversation offers wisdom, warmth, and hope for coaches building meaningful, sustainable practices in a fast-changing world.For more information about Ruth, visit https://www.ruthrochelle.com/For more information about host Joey Owen, visit http://www.joeyowencoaching.com/Read more about The Coach's Journey at www.thecoachsjourney.com.Music by My Good Man William: listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/4KmeQUcTbeE31uFynHQLQgTo support the Coach's Journey, visit www.patreon.com/thecoachsjourney and to join the Coach's Journey Community visit www.thecoachsjourney.com/community. THINGS WE TALKED ABOUT THAT YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN:FREE Ebook: An Introduction to The Coaching Business Flywheel: https://www.thecoachsjourney.com/thecoachingbusinessflywheel Ruth Rochelle on The Coach's Journey Podcast (previous episode) https://www.thecoachsjourney.com/podcast/78-ruth-rochelle-insight-seminars-systems-theory-and-the-path-to-our-current-truth International Coaching Federation (ICF) https://coachingfederation.org/European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC) https://www.emccglobal.org/ Tim Gallwey – The Inner Game of Tennis https://www.amazon.co.uk/Inner-Game-Tennis-Classic-Performance/dp/1447288505 Robert Kegan https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Kegan Suzanne Cook-Greuter https://www.linkedin.com/in/susanne-cook-greuter-60056322b/ Bill Torbert https://gla.global/team_member/professor-bill-torbert/ For more on Adult Development on The Coach's Journey, see our interview with Jennifer Garvey Berger https://www.thecoachsjourney.com/podcast/episode-42-jennifer-garvey-berger-the-answer-to-either-or-is-both Sir John Whitmore – Coaching for Performance https://www.amazon.co.uk/Coaching-Performance-Principles-Personal-Professional/dp/1473658128 The Coach's Journey Podcast with Ruth Rochelle and Joey (video version) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kby9-D_5JwA BIOGRAPHY FROM RUTHFor more than 25 years Ruth has been a coach – an executive and team coach, workshop facilitator, transformational coach and coach supervisor – with private clients and with organisations.Ruth is an Accredited Master Executive Coach with APECS, an IFS (Internal Family Systems) Practitioner with the IFS Institute and a Coaching Constellations Practitioner, and her clients have included creative professionals, start-up founders, senior managers, young emerging leaders, celebrities, coaches, and many more.Ruth supports her clients to create and achieve their visions, enrich their relationships, navigate changing circumstances, embark on new life directions, start and grow businesses, address specific challenges, experience greater wellbeing and connect to a meaningful purpose.
Money anxiety, retirement fears, and the quiet worry about being alone are hitting many women in midlife. In this walk-and-talk episode, Chalene Johnson opens up about the top financial and emotional concerns women are sharing right now—from fear of not saving enough to the loneliness that creeps in as life changes. She offers practical, doable steps to get control of your finances, strengthen your relationships, and create more security for the future. Plus, a wild story about intuition and an update on Penelope that might make you rethink what's “just coincidence.”
As an avid reader, I'm always seeking that next great book. The one that allows me to see myself and the world more clearly, comforts me when I'm lost, or inspires me to move through my day differently. This series is my opportunity to pass these remarkable books onto you, as readers of A Mind of Her Own, both for your own enjoyment and also, as a self-serving shout-out to the universe to send me more amazing, life-changing reads. I'm excited to hear what you think, and I'm so glad you're here!Life-Changing Reads: A Series1. Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation, by Parker Palmer“Vocation does not come from willfulness. It comes from listening…vocation does not mean a goal that I pursue. It means a calling that I hear.”I read this book when I was feeling lost, searching for a life that aligned with my values and desires, and doubting myself at every step. I kept hearing this call to write, to create, but I thought it was something I should do in my “non-work” time, because it wasn't a serious activity for a physician. Parker's discussion of his own struggle to find his true vocation, through an altruistic but ultimately unsustainable career path, was a fundamental guide on my journey.2. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking, by Susan Cain“So when introverts assume the observer role, as when they write novels, or contemplate unified field theory—or fall quiet at dinner parties—they're not demonstrating a failure of will or a lack of energy. They're simple doing what they're constitutionally suited for.”I listened to this book in the car, sitting in LA traffic, during my psychiatry residency. I still remember the feeling of hearing these words, suggesting my tendency to prefer listening to talking, observing to acting, thinking to doing was not because I was lazy, overly shy or antisocial. It was what I was “constitutionally suited for.” This was a revelation.Here I am now, writing books, listening as a psychiatrist and podcast host, and taking time to think about life's great mysteries. Thank you, Susan, for your beautiful writing.3. The Good Life: Lessons From the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness, by Robert Waldinger, MD and Marc Schulz, PhD“Do I matter? Some of us have lived the majority of our lives and find ourselves looking back, others have most of our lives in front of us and are looking forward. For all of us, regardless of age, it helps to remember that this question of mattering, of leaving something for future generations and of being part of something bigger than ourselves, is not just about our personal achievements—it's about what we mean to other people. And it's never too late to start now and leave a mark.”This book, by the directors of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, is a powerful summary of the lives of two generations of individuals from the same families for over 80 years. It's remarkable to read their quotes as they navigate joy, loss, struggles and successes over the years. The reason I've found it so important to read and reread is its powerful reminder of the importance of our relationships in creating happiness. Not money. Not fame. Not a perfect body. Not prizes or rings or medals. It's all about the love and connection we have in our lives.Today, as I try to navigate the overwhelmingly stressful news and constant churn of social media, it grounds me in my day-to-day life to reflect on those in my closest orbit. How can I connect with them today? How do I show my love and interest in ways both silly and sincere? Even if I've been feeling disconnected, I trust that it is never too late to leave my own mark in their lives and remember the joy of having them in mine.4. How Do You Feel? One Doctor's Search for Humanity in Medicine, by Jessi Gold, MD, MS“Sometimes, the heaviest emotional burden is to bear witness or to hold space for someone else's story. To do my job well and be someone whom people can trust, I need to care. I need to be truly empathetic. I need to be raw and available.”This beautiful book, by Jessi Gold, describes so many aspects of my experience as a psychiatrist. She writes about the unique emotional toll of meeting with patients during some of their darkest moments, as they are working to overcome trauma, abuse, loss or grave illnesses. Reading this was incredibly validating. In the past, when I had finished my clinical week, I would look back and wonder, “Why can't I do more? Why didn't I see more patients? There is so much need.”Dr. Gold's book helped me to be self-compassionate, recognizing I could only be truly present if I also took care of myself. This is a message I now try to pass along to the psychiatry residents I teach. We are human, and we have limits. Thank you, Jessi, for generously sharing your life with us. Your work is so important.Listen to Dr. Gold on The Reflective Mind Podcast at https://amindofherown.substack.com/p/speaking-the-quiet-part-out-loud?r=1wdz1l5. Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life: How to Finally, Really Grow Up by James Hollis, Ph.D.“To engage with the summons of our souls is to step into the deepest ocean, uncertain whether we will be able to swim to some new, distant shore. And yet, until we have consented to swim beyond the familiar lights of the port left behind, we will never arrive at a newer shore.”This stunning book, by Dr. James Hollis, a Jungian scholar and prolific writer, shares his own story of midlife depression and his decision to leave the familiar to seek training in Zurich and become a Jungian analyst. He writes beautifully about his struggle to identify his own path with the guidance of Jung's theory of individuation, defined as “the lifelong project of becoming more nearly the whole person we were meant to be.” I read and re-read this book as I was struggling with my own path to meaning in midlife, and I found such comfort in his powerful belief that we all can tap into what we already know: the person we are most meant to be.You can listen to his beautiful description of his path here: https://amindofherown.substack.com/p/a-nameless-longing-when-your-soul?r=1wdz1l6. Shrill, by Lindy West (I also highly recommend the Hulu series by the same name, starring Aidy Bryant )“I am my body. When my body gets smaller, it is still me. When my body gets bigger, it is still me. There is not a thin woman inside me, awaiting excavation. I am one piece.”Thinking back on my training during medical school and beyond, I can summarize any lecture about body size with one phrase: overweight equals unhealthy. This repeated conflation means I now must consciously uncouple one from the other in my clinical work, stepping back from the broad and imprecise shorthand to consider how they are, and are not, actually related.Lindy West's book helped me significantly as I was trying to shift my thinking on this topic. Her frank depiction of life in her larger body was at times heartbreaking (especially in the doctor's office), frequently humorous (with chapter titles like “Are you there, Margaret? It's me, a person who is not a complete freak.”) and overall a powerful motivator for change. I think all health care providers should read it at least once.If this resonates, check out my interview with Dr. Mara Gordon all about the size-inclusive healthcare revolution. https://amindofherown.substack.com/p/the-size-inclusive-healthcare-revolution?utm_source=publication-search7. Words Are My Matter: Writings on Life and Books by Ursula K. Le Guin“Fiction offers the best means of understanding people different from oneself, short of experience. Actually, fiction can be lots better than experience, because it's a manageable size, it's comprehensible, while experience just steamrollers over you and you understand what happened decades later, if ever.”I grew up in a very small town in North Dakota, just a few miles from the South Dakota border. I didn't recognize the enormity of the sky above my childhood home until I returned as an adult, head tipped back, staring upward in awe. I grew up there with a loving family and a surrounding community willing to cheer me on in events from basketball games to theater performances, but I always felt a bit out of place. Reading became my reassurance that the world was as big as the sky overhead, and I would eventually find my own path. Books also helped me recognize the importance of placing myself in another's shoes, virtual empathy-building machines that taught me about those whose lives were so incredibly different from my own.This book of Ursula K. Le Guin's essays, poems and book reviews reveals a grounded, opinionated, brilliant woman who decided to create entire worlds with stunning clarity, illuminating the challenges existing in our own. Readers and writers alike will not be sorry for taking a moment to absorb her work.If this interests you, please feel free to listen to my short essay, Books are Empathy Machines.8. Intimations by Zadie Smith“Talking to yourself can be useful. And writing means being overheard.”This book by Zadie Smith, a collection of six essays, was published in 2020, and provides a glimpse into the author's life during the early months of the Covid-19 virus. I've long been an admirer of her fiction, but this series allowed a much more intimate window into her wandering mind, trying to comprehend her place in a society turned inside out with uncertainty and fear.What does it mean to be an artist when people are being categorized as “essential workers?” Is loyalty to a place something that can outlast a feeling of unique vulnerability? How can writing provide an outlet for survival when the world is so fraught? There was comfort in her struggle to understand and in her feeling of disorientation, which I certainly shared. I emerged from her writing feeling more hopeful and far less alone.If this essay resonated, please feel free to check out this podcast episode Hope is the Best Antidote for Demoralization with Dr. James L. Griffith, MD9. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi“We grow up believing that what counts most in our lives is that which will occur in the future…[however] since what we experience is reality, as far as we are concerned, we can transform reality to the extent that we influence what happens in consciousness and thus free ourselves from the threats and blandishments of the outside world.”My summary: We are always living for tomorrow, while life only happens right now, in our moment-by-moment experience, which we have the power to shape through our attention.You have likely heard of the concept of Flow, described by Dr. Csikszentmihalyi (here is a googled pronunciation: chik sent mee hai ee) as an optimal experience when a “person's body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.” It is often referred to as being in a “flow state,” so immersed in a particular task that you lose track of time and are able to concentrate in a prolonged and highly satisfying way. He refers to our attention our “psychic energy.” Where we give our attention is quite literally how we experience our lives. This has never been more relevant, each of us tasked with creating our own protective filters from the onslaught of demands on our limited—because we're human—attention spans.This book is a revelation, with insights about the very nature of consciousness, what it means to be happy, and how we can infuse our lives with more pleasure. Flow can emerge in a wide variety of settings, whether it's while listening to or creating music, engaging in satisfying sex or consuming delicious foods. It may also occur when we are working on a challenging problem at the office, pushing past a confusing but compelling problem in school, or out solving problems in the world beyond. I've learned so much from his writing, and have absorbed his ideas which influence many of my own.If the concept of a flow and the quest for a meaningful life is of interest, check out my interview, “What Lights You Up?' with Dr. Jordan Grumet, palliative care physician and writer.10. Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief by Pauline Boss“In the case of ambiguous loss…complicated grieving can be a normal reaction to a complicated situation—the endless searching of a battlefield by the mother of a missing soldier; a stepchild's angry outbursts when his biological parent is totally excluded; a wife's depression and withdrawal because her husband has suffered a brain injury and is no longer himself.”I've found ambiguous loss to be such a powerful and surprisingly common experience in my psychiatry practice. This idea describes the unique suffering caused by uncertainty or a lack of resolution regarding a missing loved one. This could be psychological absence of someone still in our presence, such as when our loved one is struggling with dementia or severe mental illness, or the physical absence of those we still keep very much present in our psychological lives, including missing persons with unknown whereabouts.After first reading Ambiguous Loss, I reached out to Dr. Pauline Boss, now in her 90s, to thank her for her work and speak with her about this extremely helpful framework, which had a profound effect on me. She shared the origins of the research into this topic, begun with the families of pilots declared missing in action in Vietnam and Cambodia while she was at the Center of Prisoner of War Studies in the U.S. Naval Health Research Institute in San Diego. She spoke about interviewing the wives of these missing pilots and the intense pain caused by the ambiguity surrounding their husbands' whereabouts. This ongoing, often unresolvable grief can lead to depression, isolation, and ongoing family disruption, even generations later. By giving a name to this phenomenon, however, Pauline Boss has helped countless families begin to heal from the unimaginable and move forward into a more hopeful future.11. Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant? A Memoir by Roz Chast“After my father died, I noticed that all the things that had driven me bats about him—his chronic worrying, his incessant chitchat, his almost suspect inability to deal with anything mechanical—now seemed trivial. The only emotion that remained was one of deep affection and gratitude that he was my dad.”This is the first graphic novel on my list, but it certainly won't be the last. I've been a fan of Roz Chast for a long time, with her quirky but poignant New Yorker cartoons. This powerful memoir highlights something I've found particularly helpful in my work and personal life: difficult truths are much more palatable if we can pair them with humor. My family has always taken this approach, particularly my father, coping with some truly heartbreaking cases in the hospital with an off-color joke about bowel movements around the family dinner table. Humor is also considered one of the most mature psychological defense mechanisms we use to cope with stress or loss in our lives, so way to go, Dad!Roz shares with us a uniquely painful time in her life, as her parents age well into their 90s, experiencing the indignities of increasingly frail bodies and waning independence. She writes with brave candor about the exhausting and expensive path an adult child must walk when her parents can no longer care for themselves, and her conflicted feelings as she watches them slowly fade. Her cartoons throughout provide much-needed moments of levity, as well as a beautiful tribute to the lives of these important people. If you or a loved one is going through this painful, but common, journey, this book could provide some true comfort, and maybe even a laugh or two.12. Congratulations, By the Way: Some Thoughts on Kindness by George Saunders“Be a good and proactive and even somewhat desperate patient on your own behalf—seek out the most efficacious, anti-selfishness medicines, energetically, for the rest of your life. Find out what makes you kinder, what opens you up and brings out the most loving, generous, and unafraid version of you—and go after those things as if nothing else matters.Because, actually, nothing else does.”These words are part of a lovely convocation address George Saunders delivered to the graduating students of Syracuse University, where he is a professor of creative writing. Understandably, it resonated far beyond the campus, and speaks a truly important message for today's world.I should admit, I have a soft spot for George Saunders. I imagine I'm not alone in this. I saw him speak at a New Yorker Festival event several years ago and he did not disappoint: sharp as a tack while also being thoughtful and extremely humble. In addition, he was super funny, which made sense because he's the author of one of the most hilarious short stories I've ever read. In “Pastoralia,” two employees are assigned to a caveman diorama in a fading fun park. One of them, who takes his role incredibly seriously, frequently pretends to scan the horizon for large game and refuses to speak to his cave mate, using only grunts and body language to communicate. The other employee, a chain-smoking, mint-eating mother of a struggling adult child seems to be trying to just get through the day, breaking every rule of proper performance, much to her cave mate's dismay. The story is simply sublime.My dear friend, John, who trained with me in psychiatry residency and became one of my dearest friends, introduced me to this story, along with other memorable cultural experiences such as the show “Broad City” and referring to the bathroom as the “wazzer.” He died in 2020 after a battle with brain cancer, but his legacy lives on, especially in my plan to someday turn “Pastoralia” into a musical (his idea). After all, what better way to honor his memory? Miss you John, but thank you for all you taught me.Thanks for reading A Mind of Her Own! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and hear about upcoming episodes & book events.Find Dr. Reid on Instagram: @jenreidmd and LinkedInYou can also preorder her upcoming book, Guilt Free!Also check out Dr. Reid's regular contributions to Psychology Today: Think Like a Shrink.Seeking a mental health provider? Try Psychology TodayNational Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255Dial 988 for mental health crisis supportSAMHSA's National Helpline - 1-800-662-HELP (4357)-a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.Disclaimer:The views expressed on this podcast reflect those of the host and guests, and are not associated with any organization or academic site. Also, AI may have been used to create the transcript and notes, based only on the specific discussion of the host and guest and reviewed for accuracy.The information and other content provided on this podcast or in any linked materials, are not intended and should not be construed as medical advice, nor is the information a substitute for professional medical expertise or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this website is for general information purposes only.If you or any other person has a medical concern, you should consult with your health care provider or seek other professional medical treatment. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something that have read on this website, blog or in any linked materials. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or emergency services (911) immediately. You can also access the National Suicide Help Line at 1-800-273-8255 or call 988 for mental health emergencies. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit amindofherown.substack.com
We say friends are what make life worth living. But if that's true, why are so many of us struggling to find and keep them these days? And what can we do to cultivate better friendships?Join us as we talk to psychiatrist Robert Waldinger about the importance of friendship to our health and happiness, and to philosopher Samuel Kimbriel about the keys to forming meaningful friendships and the helpful advice spiritual traditions offer. Along the way, we'll also ask what it means to be a good friend… and what that means for society as a whole. Robert Waldinger is Director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development and co-author, with Marc Schulz, of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness. Learn more about his work at his website, and about his practice as a Zen priest with the Henry David Thoreau Sangha here. Samuel Kimbriel is Founding Director of the Aspen Institute's Philosophy & Society Initiative and author of the book Friendship as Sacred Knowing: Overcoming Isolation. He is also Editor-at-Large at Wisdom of Crowds.
McKay returns today for an extensive exploration into how our responses to life's setbacks shape our journey. Drawing insights from the Harvard Study of Adult Development, he challenges conventional wisdom, arguing that our perspective transforms challenges from daunting "mountains" into manageable "molehills."McKay reveals happiness isn't predicted by wealth or IQ, but by an "adaptive coping style" - learning from failures to create growth, akin to turning "lemons into lemonade." This is exemplified by Bill Graham, who overcame immense hardship through helping others and embracing a positive outlook. The episode utilizes a "halftime" metaphor for life, urging listeners to assess, learn from past "plays," and strategize for moving forward, rather than dwelling on what cannot be changed. As you will hear, avoiding overreaction to minor inconveniences and fostering a positive "frame of reference" with supportive networks enables us to "fail forward."Main Themes:Our response to failure drives happiness.Adaptive coping matters more than wealth or IQ.Learn from mistakes; turn setbacks into chances.Friends and inspiration help overcome challenges.The halftime metaphor: review, adjust, plan ahead.Overreacting to small issues reduces happiness.Positive thoughts anchor our brain's frame of reference.Faith empowers us to overcome obstacles.Release small worries; value missteps for a content life.Top 10 Quotes:"Almost all failures are not mountains but molehills in the valley of life, unless we make them mountains.""It isn't so much what they started with, what mistakes they made, or what happened to them that influenced their happiness in life, it's what they did with what happened to them that mattered.""Learn to live in thankfulness, looking back at what you have had, and what you didn't have, and most of all, what you do have now.""The difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and their response to failure.""A single event doesn't have to define who we are. Instead, we can consider our life over time and look at who we've become as a result of our cumulative choices.""This positive adaptation to life played a significantly greater role than genetics, wealth, race or other factors in determining how happy people were later in life.""Researchers in the study call this an 'adaptive coping style' and describe it as the capacity to turn lemons into lemonade and not turn molehills into mountains.""When we're in the midst of failure, we need to give our brain a framework based on true principles.""Halftime is perhaps the most important part of the game.""Let go of the small things. Value your small missteps, they make us better. Don't sweat the small stuff."Show Links:Open Your Eyes with McKay Christensen
PURCHASE THIS PODCOURSE! If you are a therapist or counselor looking for continuing education, check out my NBCC Approved $5 Podcourses and other continuing education offerings.Plus, get your first Podcourse half off. In this Podcourse episode, I sit down with Dr. Timothy Davis, a psychologist who has spent his career working with what he calls “challenging boys.” He shares how his background, from academic research to volunteer firefighting, inspired a practical framework that helps parents manage meltdowns, build resilience, and strengthen their connection with their child. Together, we explore how therapists can support parents in creating effective Emergency Plans, identifying skill deficits in emotion regulation and executive functioning, and applying family systems principles to improve family dynamics. Our hope is that you'll walk away with fresh strategies you can integrate into your clinical work right away and you can also earn one NBCC continuing education contact hour by completing this Podcourse.
In this episode, Dr. Robert Waldinger explores why good relationships are the key to living a long and happy life. Drawing from more than 85 years of research, Robert shares why deep, supportive relationships are stronger predictors of health and happiness than wealth, success, or status. He also explains how relationships regulate stress, why loneliness can be as harmful as smoking, and how we can proactively cultivate social fitness. Listeners will walk away with practical ways to strengthen existing relationships, build new ones, and approach connection as an essential practice for well-being.We need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it's a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You!Key Takeaways:The significance of relationships for health and happiness.Insights from the Harvard Study of Adult Development on what constitutes a good life.The complexities and challenges of living well despite societal pressures.The impact of loneliness and social isolation on physical and mental health.The critique of cultural messages equating happiness with material success.The importance of self-acceptance and acknowledging both positive and negative aspects of oneself.Strategies for nurturing and maintaining meaningful relationships.The role of curiosity in enhancing social connections and overcoming discomfort.The intersection of scientific research and Zen practice in understanding human well-being.The concept of “social fitness” and the ongoing effort required to cultivate relationships.If you enjoyed this conversation with Robert Waldinger, check out these other episodes:The Midlife Makeover: Redefining Success and Happiness After 40 with Chip ConleyThe Happiness Formula: Using Your Body to Transform Your Mind with Janice KaplanFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by:NOCD If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/FEEDGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Excellence doesn't require obsession—it requires integration. We've all heard the advice: focus on one thing, say no to everything else, single-minded purpose is the path to success. Books like Gary Keller's The One Thing and Greg McKeown's Essentialism make a powerful case for focus. But what happens when that focus becomes obsession? In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate unpacks the dark side of a single-minded pursuit—burnout, isolation, and the crushing disappointment of reaching the “top” only to find it lonely. Drawing on insights from Benjamin Hardy, research from the Harvard Study of Adult Development, and real-world examples from Yo-Yo Ma to Venus Williams, Kate makes the case for a different kind of excellence. One rooted in balance, relationships, and impact. You'll learn: Why obsession is not the same as excellence. How even your biggest achievements can feel hollow without integration. The critical role relationships and contribution play in long-term fulfillment. Practical strategies for pursuing excellence without sacrificing everything else. If you've ever felt the pressure to “go all in” on one singular purpose—or if you've achieved success but still feel something's missing—this episode is for you. Tales from The Lane is the podcast for high achievers and successful creatives who want more than just accomplishments—they want a deeply fulfilling life. Links & Resources: Grab my free Quarterly Retreat Planning Guide Follow me on Instagram: @katekayaian My book: Beyond Potential: A Guide for Creatives Who Want to Re-Assess, Re-Define, and Re-Ignite Their Careers – Order here
What if we're going about happiness and longevity all wrong? In our latest episode, Dr. Greg Kelly is joined by Dr. Robert J. Waldinger, a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, Zen priest, and Director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development. Our conversation centers around one of the world's longest studies of adult life, spanning over 80 years. Over the years, researchers studied the participants' health trajectories and their broader lives, including their achievements and failures in careers and marriage, and the findings produced startling life lessons. Teaser: people's level of satisfaction with their relationships at age 50 was a better predictor of physical health than their cholesterol levels were. Sponsored by Qualia Senolytic: https://qualialife.com/podcastoffer. Use code podcast when you shop Qualia Senolytic for 15% off your order. Get in touch. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/qualialife. Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/qualialife. Email: support@qualialife.com.
Can something really predict how long you'll live—better than your genes? This episode breaks down one of the most overlooked yet powerful predictors of lifespan: social connection. Based on landmark studies like the Harvard Study of Adult Development and meta-analyses spanning over 300,000 participants, we explore how loneliness, emotional isolation, and the quality of your relationships directly influence your risk of chronic disease, cognitive decline, and early death. Whether you're optimizing for longevity, brain health, or emotional well-being, this may be the most important health insight you're not paying attention to. What you'll learn: How loneliness compares to smoking and obesity in terms of health risk The neurological and hormonal effects of deep connection What the longest-lived people on earth have in common socially The difference between quantity and quality of relationships Science-backed strategies to strengthen your social fitness Referenced studies include: Holt-Lunstad et al., 2010 meta-analysis on social isolation and mortality risk The 85+ year Harvard Study on Adult Development Research on oxytocin, inflammation, and the vagus nerve in connection to relationships Follow Shawn: instagram.com/shawnmodel/ *** I'm Louisa Nicola — clinical neurophysiologist — Alzheimer's prevention specialist — founder of Neuro Athletics. My mission is to translate cutting-edge neuroscience into actionable strategies for cognitive longevity, peak performance, and brain disease prevention. If you're committed to optimizing your brain — reducing Alzheimer's risk — and staying mentally sharp for life, you're in the right place. Stay sharp. Stay informed. Join thousands who subscribe to the Neuro Athletics Newsletter → https://bit.ly/3ewI5P0 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/louisanicola_/ Twitter : https://twitter.com/louisanicola_ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Tickets Puras Cosas Maravillosashttps://www.erikadelavega.com/purascosasmaravillosas Mi libro REINVENTADA ya disponible https://www.erikadelavega.com/libro-erikadelavega-reinventada Comienza tu camino de bienestar con Opción Yo https://opcionyo.trb.ai/wa/18zyZN2 De lo único que te vas a arrepentir es no de haber comenzado antes. El evento que estabas esperando!!! Si estás en Miami nos vemos este 28 de septiembre en el Mr.C Hotel junto a mis queridas Doctoras Ana Kausel y Rocío Salas-Whalen en este evento que llamamos: Reinvención Hormonal. Un día donde exploraremos juntas cómo funcionan nuestras hormonas, qué cambios experimenta nuestro cuerpo y cómo podemos tomar decisiones informadas para vivir esta etapa con plenitud. Son cupos limitados así que asegura el tuyo aquí https://tiranube.ticketspice.com/reinvencion-hormonal En este episodio de En Defensa Propia, tuve el honor de conversar con Margarita Tarragona, una experta en psicología positiva y terapia narrativa, para explorar el poder transformador de las relaciones humanas en nuestra felicidad y bienestar. A lo largo de nuestra charla, descubrí que, más allá del trabajo, el propósito o las rutinas de autocuidado, lo que más influye en nuestra felicidad son las relaciones interpersonales de calidad. Margarita me explicó que la psicología tradicional se ha enfocado en estudiar patologías y problemas, pero la psicología positiva viene a equilibrar esta mirada, investigando qué nos hace florecer como personas. Un concepto fundamental que abordamos es la agencia personal, esa sensación de poder influir en nuestra vida, que es antagónica a la desesperanza que se relaciona con la depresión. Entender que puedo actuar y generar cambios, aunque no todo dependa de mí, es un gran paso hacia una vida más plena. Otro punto clave fue la importancia de la narrativa personal, la historia que nos contamos a nosotros mismos sobre quiénes somos y cómo vemos el mundo. Margarita me contó cómo es posible transformar esas narrativas negativas que nos limitan, por medio de la aceptación y la búsqueda consciente de evidencias positivas en nuestra vida, un enfoque que me parece liberador y esperanzador. Uno de los hallazgos que más me impactó fue que, según estudios como el famoso Harvard Study of Adult Development, la calidad de nuestras relaciones es el principal predictor de nuestra felicidad y salud a largo plazo. Esto me hizo reflexionar sobre la importancia de construir relaciones saludables basadas en la risa, la diversión compartida, la amabilidad y la gratitud.También conversamos sobre la vulnerabilidad como un ingrediente esencial para conectar auténticamente, aunque sabemos que abrirse puede implicar riesgos emocionales. Margarita compartió que la terapia es una herramienta valiosa para superar miedos y heridas pasadas que dificultan relacionarnos. Para cerrar, Margarita me dejó tres consejos poderosos para mejorar nuestras relaciones: expresar gratitud, mantener una curiosidad genuina por los demás y compartir momentos que generen emociones positivas. Esta conversación me ha dejado claro que la felicidad no es un estado superficial ni un destino lejano, sino un proceso que se construye día a día, principalmente a través de la calidad de nuestras relaciones y la conexión auténtica con nosotros mismos y con los demás. En En Defensa Propia, seguiré explorando estos temas que nos ayudan a vivir una vida más plena y consciente.
Chalene Johnson gets real about why female friendships feel harder in midlife—and why they're more important than ever for a woman's health and happiness. In this episode, she opens up about the science-backed benefits of meaningful connection, including lowered risk of depression, boosted mood, and even increased longevity. Chalene shares surprisingly simple strategies she recommends for finding your people even after moving to a new city - no matter your age or stage of life. Watch this Episode on YouTube this Sunday
Dr. Robert Waldinger talks about his new book The Good Life: Lessons From the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness, which explores lessons from the longest scientific study of happiness. Dr. Robert Waldinger is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital, and co-founder of the Lifespan Research Foundation. He is also a Zen master and teaches meditation in New England and around the world. His TED Talk is one of the most viewed of all time, with over 43 million views. He's the co-author, along with Dr. Marc Schulz, of The Good Life. In this episode we talk about: What the Harvard Study of Adult Development is and how it got started How much of our happiness is really under our control Why you can't you be happy all the time The concept of “social fitness” Why you should “never worry alone” How having best friends at work can make you more productive And why, in his words, it's never too late to be happy Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
We humans love novelty. We seek it out. While that can be good, it can also get us in trouble. This episode begins by exploring why we seek out new things, places and experiences and what happens after we do. Source: Winifred Gallagher author of the book New (https://amzn.to/3XsAxRb) Did you know that one of the reasons we gesture with our hands when we talk is to help us figure out what to say next? That is just one example of how thinking isn't all about what goes on in the brain, according to my guest Annie Murphy Paul. She is science writer whose work has appeared in the Boston Globe, Scientific American, Slate, Time magazine and she is author of the bestselling book The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain (https://amzn.to/3Hp3k3R) Imagine if you followed and studied a group of people for decades and watched how they lived? You would discover a lot about what makes people healthy and happy over time. That's what The Harvard Study of Adult Development is all about. Researchers have followed the lives of two generations of individuals from the same families for more than 80 years. Listen and you will be amazed by what they found. My guest is Robert J. Waldinger, who directs the study and is author of the book, The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness (https://amzn.to/3HpbFVc) Where are you on the introvert/extrovert scale? Listen as I explain the difference between extroversion and introversion and how to tell which one you are. You will also discover the difference between being shy and being introverted. And it's a big difference. Source: Susan Cain author Quiet (https://amzn.to/3XQUH7d) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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