The Art of Charm

Modern life has made friendship feel more confusing, fragile, and isolating than ever. In this episode, journalist and author Anna Goldfarb joins us to unpack the paradox of modern friendship — why we're lonelier despite being more connected, and what we can do to build stronger, more fulfilling relationships. Anna shares her “Triple D” framework (Desire, Diligence, Delight) and breaks down the hidden architecture of great friendships: clear aboutness, healthy compartmentalization, emotional maturity, and the courage to reconnect. Whether you're tired of being everyone's unpaid therapist or simply wondering how to revive a drifting connection, this episode gives you the practical tools and emotional insight to reset your social life — no cringe required. What to Listen For [00:00] Why affection alone isn't enough for deep friendship [00:01:09] What's changed about adult friendships — and why we're feeling more disconnected [00:04:16] The hidden cost of unlimited choice and hyper-individualism [00:08:07] Active vs. nostalgic friendships: how to tell the difference [00:11:19] Every great friendship has an “About” — and here's how to find yours [00:14:39] 6 hard truths about friendship (and how to stop blaming yourself) [00:23:01] Why emotional maturity is the new social skillset [00:33:56] The Triple D framework for building strong friendships [00:44:10] How to avoid being an unpaid therapist (and stop pushing people away) [00:52:34] The Friendship Cleanse: reset your network with clarity and care Episode Takeaways: Connection isn't about quantity — it's about clear shared meaning. Find your friendship “About.” It's okay to compartmentalize your relationships. Not every friend needs to be your everything. Friendships require maintenance. If it matters, don't let the silence stretch too long. Maturity means asking: am I showing up the way I want to be treated? Most people want to reconnect. They're just waiting on someone to go first. Make time for delight. Reignite friendships by creating new shared memories — not just rehashing old ones. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Anna Goldfarb on Substack Anna Goldfarb on Instagram Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You've got names in your phone that make you smile—but when's the last time you actually reached out? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak share four simple, science-backed strategies to reconnect with old friends, former mentors, and professional contacts—even if it's been years. From “because I thought of you” texts to expert taps and nostalgia sparks, this is your action plan for rebuilding relationships that matter. If you've been waiting for the perfect moment to reach out, this episode is your sign to stop waiting and start reconnecting. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why reconnection matters—and why it feels harder than it actually is [00:03:00] Why people appreciate surprise check-ins more than you think [00:04:30] Strategy #1: The Expert Tap—ask for advice to reignite respect [00:06:30] Strategy #2: The Thoughtful Share—send content that reflects shared interests [00:08:30] Strategy #3: The Nostalgia Spark—use memories to bring back connection [00:09:30] Strategy #4: The Results Loop—follow up on past advice to show impact [00:10:30] Why mentors love hearing the outcome of their guidance [00:12:00] This week's challenge: Reconnect with 3 people using any strategy Episode Takeaways Most people love being contacted out of the blue, even if it's been years Rebuilding old relationships is often faster and more impactful than making new ones Use the Expert Tap to ask for advice—it shows respect and reignites connection Send a Thoughtful Share (article, podcast, project) to rekindle shared interests Trigger warm emotions through Nostalgia Sparks—photos or throwback memories Close the Results Loop by showing how someone's past advice helped you Reaching out adds real value to others' lives and strengthens your network long-term This week: reconnect with one friend, one mentor, and one former coworker Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Art of Charm, we sit down with Dr. Robert Biswas-Diener and Professor Christian van Nieuwerburgh, authors of Radical Listening: The Art of True Connection. Together, they unpack a new framework for transforming your conversations—not with better scripts, but with sharper intention. Drawing from psychology, coaching, and decades of research, we explore the six listening motivations, why “active listening” falls short, and how to avoid the silent killers of connection—like half-listening, politeness, and certainty. Whether you're leading a team, navigating tough conversations, or simply tired of being misunderstood, this episode is a masterclass in making people feel truly seen, heard, and valued. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Introduction [00:03:08] What is Radical Listening and how does it go beyond active listening? [00:06:49] Six listening intentions—and how they change everything [00:09:55] How to set the stage for hard conversations with appreciation, not authority [00:17:34] Why quick, genuine care matters more than long, empty check-ins [00:25:17] The myth of being a “great listener” and what most high performers miss [00:34:33] Why watching yourself on video can instantly improve your listening [00:38:12] What does “listening for” versus “listening to” actually mean? [00:45:33] The real cost of half-listening—and why it breaks trust [00:51:26] How to interject without interrupting—and why it's actually radical empathy Episode Takeaways: You're not being ignored because you're unimportant—people are stuck in half-attention. Flip the script by modeling radical listening. Start with intention. Every conversation is a choice—validate, influence, learn, support. Know what you're there to do. Interruptions aren't rude if they're respectful. Interject to amplify, not hijack. In your leadership, it's not what you say—it's how you show you care. A 60-second check-in can change someone's entire day. Half-listening is worse than not listening at all. Either be fully present—or ask to talk later.The best listeners aren't born—they're trained. Develop your awareness like a skill, not a trait. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Radical Listening: The Art of True Connection CoachOnAMotorcycle.com (Christian's site) IntentionalHappiness.com (Robert's site) Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Moving to a new city can feel like starting over—but it doesn't have to. In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak break down a science-backed three-step strategy to plug into a brand-new social circle in weeks, not months. Whether you're relocating or just looking to shake up your current routine, you'll learn how to find the right spaces, start meaningful conversations, and turn physical activity into instant connection. Plus, you'll walk away with this week's Triple Stack Challenge that jumpstarts your social success. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why moving is the perfect moment to build a better social life [00:02:00] The danger of bubble living—and how to break out of it [00:03:30] What is a “third place” and why it's the secret to meeting new people [00:07:30] Johnny's story: How bartending made him everyone's first friend [00:09:00] Client story: How Luke built a social circle through a run club and open mic [00:10:00] Framework #2: The “Because Disclosure” to trigger instant trust [00:12:00] How to make small talk meaningful with personal micro-disclosure [00:13:00] Framework #3: Use physical activity to create social glue [00:14:00] Client story: From workouts to racketball to finding your tribe [00:15:00] Weekly Practice Plan: Block time, script disclosures, and test workouts [00:16:00] Triple Stack Challenge: Third place → Opener → Invite Episode Takeaways Within the first 90 days of moving, forming one close tie can increase happiness by over 50% Avoid "bubble living" by identifying a third place outside work and home Repeated presence at third places creates propinquity—we like who we see often Use “because disclosures” to spark trust and show vulnerability instantly Even trivial reasons build connection, thanks to Ellen Langer's Xerox study Join group physical activities (run clubs, fitness classes, rec sports) for biochemical bonding Use the Triple Stack: Pick a third place, open with a disclosure, invite to an activity Prep matters—script disclosures, treat social outings like meetings, and take brief notes after interactions to increase recall and follow-up success A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at ⁠theartofcharm.com/sc⁠ and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our ⁠CIA-proven guide⁠ to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at ⁠quince.com/charm⁠ for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at ⁠shopify.com/charm⁠. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at ⁠Indeed.com/charm⁠. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at ⁠theartofcharm.com/influence⁠. ⁠DCM Insights⁠ ⁠The Activator Advantage: What Today's Rainmakers Do Differently⁠ ⁠The Challenger Sale: Taking Control of the Customer Conversation⁠ ⁠HBR: What Today's Rainmakers Do Differently⁠ ⁠AJ on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠Johnny on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠AJ on Instagram⁠ ⁠Johnny on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on YouTube⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Art of Charm, we sit down with Matt Dixon, co-author of The Challenger Sale and The Activator Advantage. In today's conversation, Matt Dixon reveals why the professionals dominating in today's market aren't necessarily the most credentialed, but the most proactive. We explore Matt's research across 3,000 professionals and break down the five business development personas, highlighting the unique traits and habits that make the “Activator” profile the highest performer of them all. Whether you're in sales, consulting, law, or simply trying to future-proof your career, adopting the activator mindset can radically shift how you're perceived and what doors open next. This episode will show you how to stop waiting for opportunity—and start creating it. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why clients forget about you—and how activators stay top of mind [00:01:14] The 5 business development personas and why activators win [00:09:56] Data shows activators are the top performers—and least likely to fail [00:17:52] How activators manage their network like a pipeline—not a popularity contest [00:24:13] The myth of being annoying: why clients want more outreach, not less [00:33:08] “No” isn't the end: how activators turn rejection into opportunity [00:39:24] The 4-part insight framework for opening doors with ideas [00:45:57] Why you must prune stale relationships to stay high-impact [00:54:49] The activator approach to events: plan, target, and follow through [01:01:53] Don't just post on LinkedIn—why DMs and engagement matter more Episode Takeaways: Activators don't rely on being top of mind—they engineer it by adding value consistently. Smart professionals build leverage by helping others long before there's anything to gain. Great client relationships aren't the result of great work—they're often the cause of it. Build trust early, not just after the sale. No doesn't mean never. Activators stay present, learn why they lost, and often get the callback when things go sideways. Learn to prune. Keep your “inner circle” warm. Everyone else? Let them go. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. DCM Insights The Activator Advantage: What Today's Rainmakers Do Differently The Challenger Sale: Taking Control of the Customer Conversation HBR: What Today's Rainmakers Do Differently AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most networking advice feels awkward, outdated, or downright useless—until now. In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak hand you three conversation frameworks that eliminate the stress of small talk and turn fleeting chats into lasting relationships. Whether you dread mixers or freeze up trying to sell your value, this episode walks you through one opener, one value exchange, and one graceful exit line that make you the most memorable person in the room. Plus, you'll learn why your follow-up rates are failing—and how to fix them in under 30 seconds. What to Listen For [00:00:00] The "name badge invisibility" feeling and why mixers cause anxiety [00:02:00] Starter Line Framework: Make observations that spark real conversations [00:06:00] Value Exchange Framework: Flip small talk into collaboration [00:08:30] How to offer value without sounding salesy or forced [00:10:30] Client story: How one line turned a stranger into a business partner [00:13:30] The Peak-End Rule and how to leave people remembering you fondly [00:14:30] Follow-up hack: 25% boost in memory with a two-line recap [00:16:00] This week's challenge: Run the loop—starter, value, exit—and DM your results Episode Takeaways People consistently underestimate how much others like them—this is called the liking gap Use context-rich openers that are novel and observational to stand out in any crowd Instead of pitching, build bridges with value recognition and small favors A clear, appreciative exit is often the most memorable part of the interaction The Peak-End Rule means people judge conversations by the emotional high point and ending Write down just two lines after a conversation to increase your recall and follow-up success Preparing just three lines before a mixer can turn dread into confidence Great networking isn't about working the room—it's about running the loop with intent Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at ⁠theartofcharm.com/sc⁠ and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! A Word From Our Sponsors Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our ⁠CIA-proven guide⁠ to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at ⁠quince.com/charm⁠ for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at ⁠shopify.com/charm⁠. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at ⁠Indeed.com/charm⁠. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at ⁠theartofcharm.com/influence⁠. ⁠Negotiations Collective website⁠ ⁠Scott Tillema's website⁠ ⁠Scott Tillema on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠AJ on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠Johnny on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠AJ on Instagram⁠ ⁠Johnny on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on YouTube⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on TikTok⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Art of Charm, retired SWAT hostage negotiator Scott Tillema shares his battle-tested four-part framework for leading difficult conversations, defusing high-stakes conflicts, and influencing others with clarity and confidence. Trained by the FBI and Harvard, Scott now brings these skills to the boardroom, equipping leaders with the same life-saving tools he once used in crisis negotiations. Whether you're navigating a tense meeting, resolving conflict on your team, or having a hard conversation at home, this episode will show you how to lead with calm authority. Scott reveals why tactical empathy is more powerful than persuasion, how to control your emotional state when the pressure's on, and what most people get wrong about timing, tone, and respect. [00:00:00] Introduction [00:02:47] Why your negotiation partner is not your opponent — and how that shift changes everything [00:10:50] The biggest mistake leaders make when trying to influence others [00:16:02] How to mentally prepare for high-pressure conversations using tactical breathing [00:22:34] The transformation that happens when you stop learning and start embodying [00:27:15] How to know when it's the right time to speak — and when it's too soon [00:30:46] Delivery over content: Why how you say it matters more than what you say [00:34:19] The four pillars of respect that drive every meaningful negotiation [00:38:40] How autonomy — even in small doses — creates buy-in and trust [00:43:22] A high-stakes negotiation that failed — and what Scott learned from it [00:49:04] Why you should never tell someone you're reading their body language You're negotiating all the time — with your boss, your spouse, your coworkers. If you want influence, connection comes first. The best negotiators aren't master persuaders. They're master listeners. Tactical empathy isn't manipulation. It's leadership. People don't respond to logic — they respond to tone, timing, and emotional safety. Respect isn't about politeness — it's about fairness, autonomy, recognition, and empathy. Conflict isn't a threat. It's an opportunity to lead with poise and purpose. Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Negotiations Collective website Scott Tillema's website Scott Tillema on LinkedIn AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok What to Listen ForEpisode Takeaways:A Word From Our SponsorsResources from this EpisodeCheck in with AJ and Johnny! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does it actually mean to be "high value" at a networking event—and how can you radiate it without saying a word? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak break down how calm, cooperative, and confident behavior—not bravado—builds real influence. They share the science behind why people are drawn to prestige-based status, reveal the nonverbal signals that instantly raise your value, and explain how one client transformed from anxious to unforgettable using a technique you can try this week. If you've ever felt invisible in high-pressure rooms or unsure how to make lasting impressions, this episode gives you the tools to be the most memorable person in any space. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why high-value presence isn't about controlling the conversation [00:01:00] The seven-second rule: First impressions are fast and lasting [00:04:00] Emotional contagion and how people feel your value before they hear it [00:07:00] Calm is a power move: How to regulate energy at high-anxiety events [00:12:00] Case Study: How “Aaron” became the standout at a major conference [00:17:30] What to say when you're caught off guard in a group conversation [00:20:00] How to attract people without chasing them [00:22:00] Three-step challenge to be high value at your next event Episode Takeaways First impressions are made in seven seconds—calm energy signals confidence Prestige-based status builds longer, deeper influence than dominance People feel your value before they assess your skills, thanks to mirror neurons The AAA Formula—Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation—creates magnetic presence Exposure therapy helps reduce anxiety and build real confidence under pressure Elevating others (deep compliments, appreciation) increases your own value Body language speaks first—prepare before you even enter the room Being high value isn't about being loud; it's about being felt and remembered The Art of Charm Social Intelligence ProgramLooking to quickly improve your social intelligence with support from AJ, Johnny, and their team? Check out the Art of Charm Social Intelligence Program at⁠ intel.theartofcharm.com⁠. A quick application gets you on board. In your next conversation, start by sharing a small vulnerability or flaw When they respond, label the emotion you hear in their story Before leaving, ask for advice (not feedback or validation) Try all three in one conversation and report back what changed, who opened up, and what surprised you.⁠Email AJ⁠ your results ⁠AJ on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠Johnny on LinkedIn⁠ ⁠AJ on Instagram⁠ ⁠Johnny on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on Instagram⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on YouTube⁠ ⁠The Art of Charm on TikTok⁠ What to Listen ForEpisode Takeaways:A Word From Our SponsorsThis Week's ChallengeCheck in with AJ and Johnny! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this eye-opening conversation, we sit down with Simone Stolzoff, author of The Good Enough Job, to explore why modern work culture traps so many of us in cycles of burnout, identity crises, and unrealistic ambition. Drawing on research and personal experience, Simone challenges the “dream job” myth and offers a liberating framework: redefine success on your terms. We explore the dangers of workism, the importance of building an identity outside of your career, and the power of setting clear boundaries. For high-achievers who feel stuck on the hedonic treadmill, this episode offers a roadmap to a more balanced, meaningful life — without abandoning your ambition. [00:00:00] Introduction [00:02:26] The real meaning of a “good enough job” — and why it's not about slacking off [00:08:16] The rise of workism: why your job became your identity [00:13:33] The difference between boundaries and guardrails — and why we need both [00:21:14] The myth of the dream job (and why passion usually follows skill, not the other way around) [00:27:41] How to rebuild an identity outside of work and escape workaholism [00:39:28] The surprising reason people at both ends of the ambition spectrum struggle [00:50:00] Why defining your “enough” number is the antidote to endless striving [00:56:08] Simone's personal lesson: why time autonomy is his ultimate luxury Episode Takeaways: Your job should support your life, not become your life. Stop chasing perfection — a “good enough” job can free you to thrive in other areas that matter. Identity is like an investment portfolio: diversify it beyond just work. Intrinsic motivation (mastery, purpose, autonomy) beats external markers of success. Define your personal “enough” — financially, emotionally, and professionally — or risk falling into the endless “more” trap. Play, beginner's mindset, and non-work communities are secret weapons for resilience. Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Simone Stolzoff's website The Good Enough Job: Reclaiming Life from Work AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok What to Listen ForEpisode Takeaways:A Word From Our SponsorsResources from this EpisodeCheck in with AJ and Johnny! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Brief Description Charisma isn't just for extroverts or performers—it's a scientific advantage that determines how often you're invited, trusted, and remembered. In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak reveal why people decide how they feel about you before they evaluate your skills, and how this hidden force might be keeping you from the promotions and relationships you deserve. Through the story of their client Brett—a high-performer who was passed over for promotion despite working harder than everyone else—AJ and Johnny break down why being skilled isn't enough when you're perceived as "cold and unapproachable." They share three counterintuitive, science-backed techniques that transformed Brett from invisible to magnetic in both his professional and social circles. If you've ever wondered why colleagues with average skills get all the credit, or why you keep hearing you're "great at what you do" but still feel invisible, this episode reveals the subtle signals of warmth and connection you might be missing. [00:00:00] Opening introduction to the hidden force of charisma [00:02:54] How charisma opens doors and makes everything easier [00:05:36] Why warmth is judged before competence (Princeton research) [00:07:37] The "processing face" problem that makes you seem unapproachable [00:08:31] How avoiding side conversations kills career opportunities [00:10:53] The Pratfall Effect: How small mistakes make you more likable [00:11:55] The Reflective Label Technique: Mirroring emotions to build connection [00:13:30] The Benjamin Franklin Effect: Why asking for help raises your status[00:16:41] Three-step challenge to boost your charisma this week People judge your warmth before they judge your skills—without warmth, your competence won't matter Mirror neurons fire when we converse, creating shared emotional states that build connection The "processing face" problem: When you're thinking deeply, your expressionless face makes others uncomfortable The Pratfall Effect: Competent people become more likable when they reveal a small flaw or vulnerability Reflective labeling shows emotional fluency and makes people feel deeply understood The Benjamin Franklin Effect: Asking for advice activates others' investment in you and raises your status Small acts of vulnerability build more authentic connections than maintaining a "mask of competence" The Art of Charm Social Intelligence ProgramLooking to quickly improve your social intelligence with support from AJ, Johnny, and their team? Check out the Art of Charm Social Intelligence Program at intel.theartofcharm.com. A quick application gets you on board. In your next conversation, start by sharing a small vulnerability or flaw When they respond, label the emotion you hear in their story Before leaving, ask for advice (not feedback or validation) Try all three in one conversation and report back what changed, who opened up, and what surprised you.Email AJ your results AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok What to Listen ForEpisode Takeaways:A Word From Our SponsorsThis Week's ChallengeCheck in with AJ and Johnny! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on The Art of Charm, we're joined by award-winning psychologist and bestselling author Ethan Kross to explore the fascinating science of emotion regulation. In his newest book Shift: Managing Your Emotions So They Don't Manage You, Ethan reveals how emotions secretly drive 90% of our lives—and how mastering them can unlock performance, connection, and fulfillment. We dig into why your emotions feel so overwhelming, why trying harder isn't the solution, and how building your own mental "toolbox" is the real path to emotional fitness. Whether you're leading teams, raising a family, or striving for personal excellence, this conversation will give you the tactical edge you didn't even realize you needed. [00:00:00] What exactly are emotions — and why are they so hard to define? [00:06:35] How emotions are helpful — until they aren't [00:08:33] Why emotional triggers are unique to each person (and why empathy matters) [00:12:14] The surprising connection between sleep, food, and your emotional resilience [00:16:31] How to design your environment for automatic emotional shifts [00:28:20] The secret to becoming a better emotional advisor for friends, family, and teams [00:37:05] Why belief in your ability to regulate emotions is just as important as skill [00:45:51] When emotional avoidance is actually healthy [00:48:39] How elite performers make emotional regulation automatic (WOOP framework explained) Emotions aren't irrational noise — they're signals. But they must be managed with tools, not brute force. Your triggers, emotional responses, and coping strategies are as unique as your fingerprint. Stop copying other people's solutions. Mastering emotions is like mastering fitness: belief, awareness, and deliberate practice matter more than natural talent. The environment you live and work in can either sabotage or support your emotional state — design it thoughtfully. Emotional support isn't just about listening; it's about knowing when (and how) to move from empathy to problem-solving. You can't think your way through every emotional challenge — but you can train yourself to act automatically under pressure. Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Ethan Kross's website Shift: Managing Your Emotions--So They Don't Manage You AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok What to Listen ForEpisode Takeaways:A Word From Our SponsorsResources from this EpisodeCheck in with AJ and Johnny! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you missing the skill that actually determines success? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak reveal how to create genuine connections in high-stakes situations - whether it's a first date, business lunch, or million-dollar meeting. This masterclass in "vibing" breaks down the science of meaningful connection and shares practical strategies that helped one client secure a $100 million investment during a simple golf outing. AJ and Johnny explain why focusing on shared emotional states—not just similarities—is the secret to memorable connections. If you struggle with making strong impressions, maximizing limited time with important contacts, or turning brief interactions into meaningful relationships, this episode offers the framework you've been missing. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why social intelligence trumps technical skill for long-term success [00:02:04] How to approach high-stakes social situations with confidence [00:05:27] How one client secured a $100M investment during a golf outing [00:07:41] Strategic seating arrangements that create instant rapport [00:09:36] Open-ended questions that make the other person feel valued [00:12:29] Why shared emotions matter more than shared interests [00:14:09] Breaking the "question train" to avoid overwhelming others [00:16:56] How to discuss your passions authentically (even "nerdy" ones) [00:18:31] When and how to share your mission to inspire others to help [00:20:44] How to practice vibing in low-stakes situations Episode Takeaways: Social intelligence explains 85% of executive success while technical skill only accounts for 15% Sitting side-by-side creates better connection than sitting across from someone Focus on shared emotional states rather than just finding similarities Use open-ended questions that reveal both facts AND feelings Break the "question train" with the question-answer-statement formula Share your journey, not just your current credentials or position Discuss your passions with genuine emotion to create memorable connections If someone seems reserved, be the first to open up and show vulnerability Practice these skills in low-stakes situations before applying them to important meetings A Word From Our Sponsors Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Quince Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Shopify Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Indeed Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level? Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode The Art of Charm Social Intelligence Program Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a world where remote work, Slack threads, and Zoom fatigue dominate, The Art of Charm welcomes Andrew Brodsky, management professor at UT Austin and author of Ping: The Secrets of Successful Virtual Communication. This episode is a masterclass in how to reclaim productivity, enhance visibility, and communicate strategically in a virtual-first world. Andrew introduces the PING Framework — a practical toolkit for navigating digital communication with precision, warmth, and power. If you're feeling drained by back-to-back video calls, unclear on how to network virtually, or unsure how to make your contributions seen and respected — this episode offers the clarity you've been craving. What to Listen For [00:00:00] The one question almost no one asks that instantly improves meetings [00:04:39] Media richness, cue variety, and why Zoom still feels awkward [00:11:43] Introducing the PING Framework: Perspective, Initiative, Nonverbal, Goals [00:16:44] How to create communication boundaries and stop feeling “always on” [00:25:43] Generational differences and why Gen Z hates the thumbs-up emoji [00:29:05] The visibility trap of remote work and how to build presence [00:35:25] Cold messaging: why successful people are more likely to respond than you think [00:44:03] Why asking for advice increases perceived competence — not weakness [00:48:54] How to rekindle faded relationships without making it weird [00:53:47] Bringing back the “virtual water cooler” [00:57:53] Mimicry and digital nonverbal cues that build instant trust Episode Takeaways: Stop defaulting to email or video — ask how people prefer to communicate. It's a subtle power move that builds trust fast. Productivity ≠ Visibility. If no one knows what you're doing, it doesn't count. The people you look up to are getting fewer cold messages than you think. Stand out with brevity, specificity, and a simple ask. Remote communication is not inferior — it's different. Use the PING Framework (Perspective, Initiative, Nonverbal, Goals) to choose the best format for your message. Want better work-life balance? Define communication norms with your team. A thoughtful reconnection text can mean more than you think. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Ping: The Secrets of Successful Virtual Communication Andrew Brodsky's website Ping Group's website Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Art of Charm, we sit down with Sebastien Page — Chief Investment Officer at T. Rowe Price and author of The Psychology of Leadership — to explore what world-class leadership really looks like. Blending sports psychology, positive psychology, and personality science, Sebastien unpacks the mental habits of resilient leaders, the science behind stress optimization, and the silent traps that sabotage ambition. He reveals why perfection isn't the goal, why some stress is critical to peak performance, and why goals—if unchecked—can lead to ethical and personal blind spots. If you're a driven professional seeking clarity, impact, and self-mastery, this conversation will give you a psychological edge that most leaders miss. What to Listen For [00:00] Why “no stress” is not the goal — and why some stress makes you perform better [00:06:41] The misunderstood link between flow, performance, and leadership engagement [00:10:01] Stress tolerance affects team dynamics [00:13:59] The dangerous myth of the “always calm” leader [00:17:07] The hidden power of quality relationships in long-term success [00:21:29] Why goal setting without wisdom leads to burnout or regret [00:38:44] Defining your own core values vs. chasing someone else's metrics [00:42:30] The Big Five Personality Traits and how they transform leadership empathy [00:56:59] How to harness social comparison as a competitive advantage — without letting it destroy your self-worth Episode Takeaways: Stress is not the enemy. Managed correctly, it's the fuel for your best performance and presence. Leadership doesn't mean suppressing emotion. It means learning how to channel it to create clarity for others. Goal setting is powerful — but without meaning, you risk losing everything that matters chasing things that don't. Self-awareness begins with understanding how your personality shapes your leadership Don't wait for “the perfect team.” Instead, test, adapt, and build self-aware systems that evolve with context. Your most important asset isn't strategy — it's trust. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode The Psychology of Leadership: Timeless principles to improve your management of individuals, teams… and yourself! Sebastien Page on LinkedIn Harvard's 80-year study on happiness and relationships The Yerkes-Dodson Law (stress vs. performance curve) Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Art of Charm, we sit down with bestselling author and productivity renegade Oliver Burkeman to unpack his refreshingly honest approach to time, ambition, and self-worth. Drawing from his latest book Meditations for Mortals, Oliver introduces a new philosophy he calls Imperfectionism — a radical shift from hustle culture and perfection paralysis. We discuss the psychology of high achievers who constantly feel behind, the traps of productivity debt, and how letting go of perfection can paradoxically lead to real momentum, deeper relationships, and a more meaningful life. If you're constantly stuck between ambition and exhaustion, trying to “optimize” your way into fulfillment, this conversation might just be the permission slip you didn't know you needed. What to Listen For [00:00] Why all decisions come with a downside — and why that's freeing [00:03:55] What is “Imperfectionism,” and how can it help you escape productivity traps? [00:08:05] How comparison and perfectionism stop you from building meaningful connections [00:13:52] Why authenticity beats polish — in branding, leadership, and life [00:22:46] “Productivity debt” — and how it silently undermines your confidence [00:29:18] What is decision hunting, and how does it unlock real momentum? [00:33:55] Why one small outreach can reconnect you to a lost part of yourself [00:40:25] The surprising key to building lasting habits (hint: it's not willpower) [00:44:00] The “Reverse Golden Rule” that every people-pleaser needs to hear [00:53:36] Oliver's favorite meditation for starting from sanity Episode Takeaways: You're not lazy — you're stuck in the illusion of finding a perfect decision. Accepting your finitude might be your greatest advantage. Momentum doesn't come from thinking your way into action. Start small. Make a decision. Any decision. The most powerful personal brand you can build is the one where you drop the mask. If your perfectionism is driving your productivity, it's probably also driving your burnout. You can't outsource meaning — you have to make the hard trade-offs and choose your consequences intentionally. Start embodying who you want to be now, not later. Even 10 minutes a day can shift your identity. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Meditations for Mortals: Four Weeks to Embrace Your Limitations and Make Time for What Counts Oliver Burkeman's website Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In today's episode, we're joined by Jenny Wood—career coach, former Google executive, and author of Wild Courage. Over 18 years at Google, Jenny rose from entry-level to executive and created one of the company's largest career development programs. Her work focuses on breaking the myths of professional success and teaching high performers how to reclaim “taboo” traits—like being shameless, weird, or even manipulative—to build authentic relationships, increase visibility, and take control of their careers. Introduction Join us for a bold and insightful conversation with Jenny Wood as she reveals why playing it safe is holding you back—and how to reclaim traits like weird, shameless, and even manipulative to fuel career growth. Jenny shares hard-earned lessons from her rise to executive at Google, the power of strategic visibility, and why soft skills are your ultimate edge in the AI era. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What separates high performers who rise from those who stagnate in their careers? What soft skills do tens of thousands of high performers crave—despite excelling technically? Visibility, Influence, and Strategic Self-Promotion – 00:05:21 Why managing your boss isn't enough—and what it means to “manage higher” and “manage diagonally” How to get noticed before a promotion cycle even begins. What's the right way to brag—and how do you do it without sounding arrogant? Reclaiming “Taboo” Traits – 00:17:31 What are the nine negative traits Jenny says you must reclaim—and why are they the key to getting ahead? How do bold, assertive actions (like chasing someone off a subway) illustrate professional courage? Why being manipulative might actually make you a better leader Frameworks That Help You Win – 00:34:27 How to use the “WIN” framework to advocate for your needs without guilt Why saying “yes” to everything might be sabotaging your career What is the “SAFE” framework for giving clear, kind, and honest feedback? Is It Time to Leave? – 00:48:01 What's the FLIP framework—and how can it help you decide whether to stay or go? How to know when your manager is holding you back—and when it's time to make your move A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Jenny Wood's website Wild Courage: Go After What You Want and Get It Jenny Wood on LinkedIn Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's guest is Steve Magness, a world-renowned expert on human performance and resilience. As the bestselling author of Do Hard Things and Win the Inside Game, Steve has coached Olympic athletes, executives, and high performers to break through mental barriers and sustain success. With a background in sports science and psychology, he explores the hidden forces that shape motivation, decision-making, and well-being. His latest book reveals why traditional success mindsets often backfire—and how shifting to a quest-driven approach can help you thrive in both work and life. Join us for a powerful conversation with Steve Magness as he reveals why the mindset that drives success can also sabotage happiness and long-term growth. How does the pressure to achieve create hidden barriers to fulfillment? What separates those who thrive from those who burn out? Steve shares deep insights into performance psychology, the dangers of an outcome-obsessed culture, and the key mindset shift that elite athletes and high performers use to sustain success. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why does an outcome-obsessed mindset increase stress and sabotage long-term performance? What can Olympic athletes teach us about shifting from a performance mindset to a quest mindset? Escaping Survival Mode and Overcoming Anxiety – 00:13:19 What are the subtle signs that you're stuck in survival mode? Why does the human brain struggle with uncertainty, and how can you use that knowledge to your advantage? Balancing Achievement and Enjoyment – 00:24:36 How do elite performers reframe failure to fuel their growth instead of destroying their confidence? What three key elements make up a resilient personal narrative, and how can you develop yours? The Exploration vs. Commitment Dilemma – 00:38:57 How does modern technology distort our expectations in relationships, careers, and personal growth? What strategies can help you balance exploration with meaningful commitment? Moving from Passive Consumption to Active Creation – 00:43:08 How can you design your environment to prioritize deep work and meaningful progress? How do elite performers detach from short-term results while maintaining high standards? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Steve Magness's website Win the Inside Game: How to Move from Surviving to Thriving, and Free Yourself Up to Perform Steve Magness on Instagram Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the essential leadership skills that transform good managers into great ones with Sabina Nawaz. As the CEO of Nawaz Consulting, Sabina has advised Fortune 500 executives, government leaders, and nonprofit organizations on how to navigate the complexities of leadership, influence, and communication. Sabina is also the author of You're the Boss: Become the Manager You Want to Be and Others Need. Introduction Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Sabina Nawaz as she breaks down the biggest leadership challenges that most managers never see coming. Why is getting promoted one of the riskiest moments in your career? How does pressure—not power—corrupt even the best leaders? And what simple shifts can transform an overwhelmed boss into a high-impact leader?  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why is getting promoted one of the most dangerous moments in your career? Why do the skills that get you promoted stop working once you're in a leadership role? What are the three biggest mistakes new leaders make without realizing it? How Communication Defines Great Leadership – 00:09:19 What is the biggest blind spot leaders have when giving feedback? How does a simple two-word question ("Say more") instantly improve communication? The 5-to-1 Rule: How Feedback Shapes Performance – 00:19:45 What is the ideal ratio of positive to corrective feedback—and why is it so high? Why do managers fear giving too much praise, and how does this backfire? How can positive feedback be structured so it actually drives high performance? The Danger of Singular Thinking in Leadership – 00:27:08 How can a simple mental exercise help leaders see multiple perspectives? How can managers prevent team members from playing one leader against another? Mastering Self-Leadership – 00:39:05 How do childhood experiences shape leadership styles, and why does this matter? What micro-habits can leaders use to stay composed and effective under pressure? The Delegation Dial: Why Leaders Struggle to Let Go – 00:49:26 What is the Delegation Dial, and how can it help leaders empower their teams? Why do most meetings waste time—and what should they focus on instead? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Sabina's website You're the Boss: Become the Manager You Want to Be (and Others Need) Sabina Nawaz on LinkedIn Sabina Nawaz on Instagram Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the psychology of high achievement and sustainable success with Dr. Mary Anderson, who has helped countless professionals break free from burnout while maintaining their edge. She is the author of The Happy High Achiever: 8 Essentials to Overcome Anxiety, Manage Stress, and Energize Yourself for Success Without Losing Your Edge. Join us for an insightful conversation with Dr. Mary Anderson as she unpacks the psychology of high achievement and the hidden mental traps that hold ambitious professionals back. Why do so many high achievers struggle with burnout, stress, and self-doubt? How can we shift from relentless perfectionism to sustainable excellence?  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why do high achievers often feel unfulfilled despite their success? What are the most common self-sabotaging behaviors that high performers struggle with? The S.E.L.F. Formula: Four Pillars of Sustainable Success – 00:04:10 How does exercise directly impact cognitive function and productivity? What simple habit can boost your motivation and prevent burnout? The Troublesome Trifecta: Cognitive Distortions Holding You Back – 00:14:29 What are cognitive distortions, and how do they undermine confidence and success? How does perfectionism limit growth, and what's a better alternative? Breaking Free from Perfectionism and Impostor Syndrome – 00:26:27 How can high achievers reframe mistakes to fuel progress instead of anxiety? What practical mindset shift helps overcome the fear of failure? The Power of Small Victories – 00:35:01 How can high achievers reframe negative self-talk to break the cycle of avoidance? What simple litmus test helps identify harmful thought patterns? Rewiring Your Brain for Success with the "Thank You, Maui" Practice – 00:47:55 How can high achievers reprogram their thinking to enjoy both success and happiness? What is the one mindset shift that immediately lowers stress and enhances performance? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Upgrade your space with Thuma—where modern design meets craftsmanship and functionality. Get $100 off your first bed purchase at thuma.co/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Dr Mary Anderson's website The Happy High Achiever: 8 Essentials to Overcome Anxiety, Manage Stress, and Energize Yourself for Success Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the most effective approach to fly up the corporate ladder with Melody Wilding, an executive coach, human behavior expert, and acclaimed author of Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge. Recognized as one of Business Insider's “Most Innovative Coaches,” Melody specializes in guiding sensitive high-achievers—from Fortune 500 leaders to creative visionaries—helping them transform self-doubt into confidence, master their emotions, and unlock their full potential in both their careers and personal lives. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Overcome the hesitation around having difficult conversations with your boss. Planting ideas in your manager's mind for future projects and promotions. Signs You Need Help to Improve – 00:10:31 What are the signs you need help communicating your goals and ambitions to your boss? How do you align with your boss on your goals to gain their support and guidance? Implementing Feedback to Exceed Your Boss's Expectations – 00:22:40 How do you prioritize feedback to show your boss your commitment to growth and value? Why should you avoid helping co-workers too much? Setting Work Boundaries and How to Say No – 00:29:33 How to set workplace boundaries if you struggle with them personally. How do you say no to extra tasks without hurting your relationship with your boss? Avoid Single Points of Failure – 00:39:15 How to secure support from multiple leaders in case your boss or key leader leaves? Strengthen your relationship with your boss while connecting with leadership above them? Raise Your Visibility and Promotability– 00:47:45 How do you increase your visibility so your manager considers you for promotions? How do you quit on a high note and maintain a strong reputation, even mid-project? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Upgrade your space with Thuma—where modern design meets craftsmanship and functionality. Get $100 off your first bed purchase at thuma.co/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Melody Wilding's website Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge Melody Wilding on LinkedIn Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the power of connection and overcoming imposter syndrome with Dr. Adam Dorsay, a licensed psychologist, executive coach, and expert in human connection and well-being. As a TEDx speaker, podcast host, and author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love, Adam works with high-achieving professionals—from Silicon Valley executives to professional athletes—to help them reignite their passion, find purpose, and create more meaningful relationships in work and life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What does it truly mean to be super psyched about life and career? Why do so many high-achievers feel disconnected despite outward success? Overcoming Imposter Syndrome – 00:04:36 When does “fake it till you make it” help, and when does it backfire on your career and well-being? Why does the pursuit of success lead you to disconnect from people and the world? The FEED Framework for Finding Purpose – 00:24:40 What are the four pillars of the FEED framework—Flow, Energy, Education, and Depth—and how can they reveal your true passions? Why should you focus on activities that both challenge and energize you? The Driveway Test: Evaluating Relationships and Connections – 00:32:20 What is the Driveway Test, and how can it help you quickly assess which relationships energize or drain you? How can you use the Driveway Test to curate a social circle that elevates your personal and professional life? The Role of Awe and Connection to Something Greater – 00:36:26 How does experiencing awe—whether through nature, art, or human connection—enhance your well-being? Why can something as simple as birdsong be more restorative than meditation? Microdoses of Connection: A Daily Practice – 00:43:30 How can microdoses of connection—like listening to your walk-on song or savoring birdsong—boost your mental health? Why can even 5 minutes of authentic connection have a profound impact on your mood and productivity? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Upgrade your space with Thuma—where modern design meets craftsmanship and functionality. Get $100 off your first bed purchase at thuma.co/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the science of nonverbal communication and trust with Dr. Abbie Maroño, a leading expert in social influence, trust-building, and body language analysis. As a PhD researcher and international consultant, Abbie specializes in uncovering the hidden cues that shape human interaction, from boardrooms to high-stakes negotiations. Join us as we explore the science of trust and influence with Dr. Abbie Maroño as she reveals the nonverbal signals that shape first impressions and long-term relationships. How does your body language impact your credibility before you even speak? Why do we judge trustworthiness in just 33 milliseconds? And what are the hidden mistakes that sabotage cooperation and leadership?  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why do we misunderstand trust, and what's the key to building it effortlessly? What subconscious cues determine whether someone perceives us as safe or threatening? How can a single inconsistent action undo months of trust-building? Why Trust Is More Powerful Than Competition – 00:10:38 Why is the “dog-eat-dog” mentality a myth, and how does trust actually lead to greater success? Why do leaders who prioritize cooperation outperform those who rely on control and manipulation? Body Language Secrets for Influence – 00:17:49 What hidden lower-body cues reveal your true emotions—and why do they matter more than facial expressions? Why do open postures and head tilts make you instantly more likable and approachable? How can you use small, subconscious movements to project confidence in high-stakes situations? Nonverbal Communication in the Digital Age – 00:26:47 Why does Zoom and video conferencing disrupt our natural communication instincts? How can lighting, posture, and framing drastically improve your virtual presence? What common virtual meeting mistakes make people appear less trustworthy and more rigid? The #1 Mistake That Destroys Trust – 00:38:49 Why saying “I'm sorry” incorrectly actually damages relationships further. What's the right way to use eye contact to establish authority without making people uncomfortable? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Upgrade your space with Thuma—where modern design meets craftsmanship and functionality. Get $100 off your first bed purchase at thuma.co/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Abbie Maroño's website Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we dive into the science of curiosity, exploration, and human potential with Alex Hutchinson, an award-winning journalist and expert in endurance and neuroscience. A former national team long-distance runner, Alex holds a PhD in physics from Cambridge and a master's in journalism from Columbia. He has written extensively about the limits of human performance for Outside Magazine and The New Yorker. His latest book, The Explorer's Gene: Why We Seek Big Challenges, New Flavors, and the Blank Spots on the Map, uncovers the deep-rooted psychological and biological drivers that push us beyond our comfort zones. Join us for a fascinating conversation with Alex Hutchinson as we explore the science behind curiosity, exploration, and the hidden forces that drive human achievement. Why are some people wired to take risks while others avoid uncertainty? How is modern technology reshaping our natural instincts for discovery—and what's the cost? Alex unpacks the neuroscience of exploration, the impact of mental mapping on creativity, and why embracing uncertainty is the key to personal and professional growth. Discover practical strategies to break free from routine, expand your comfort zone, and harness the power of curiosity to gain a competitive edge in your career and relationships. A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. From Mongolian cashmere to iconic 100% leather jackets and versatile activewear, Quince offers quality at 50-80% less than similar brands. Plus, all items come with free shipping and a 365-day return policy. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. With thousands of customizable templates, seamless social media integration, and an all-in-one dashboard for managing sales, shipping, and payments, Shopify is the ultimate tool for entrepreneurs. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Need to hire top talent—fast? With Sponsored Jobs, your post jumps to the top, getting 45% more applications than non-sponsored listings. That's why over 3.5 million employers worldwide trust Indeed to find great candidates quickly. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Upgrade your space with Thuma—where modern design meets craftsmanship and functionality. With over 17,000 five-star reviews, Thuma's solid wood beds are precision-crafted using Japanese joinery for a silent, stable foundation. Assembly takes just five minutes—no tools required! Plus, each bed is GREENGUARD Gold certified for cleaner indoor air. Get $100 off your first bed purchase at thuma.co/charm. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode Alex Hutchinson's website The Explorer's Gene: Why We Seek Big Challenges, New Flavors, and the Blank Spots on the Map Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the art and science of conflict resolution with Dr. Jim Guinn, a renowned expert in mediation and interpersonal dynamics. As the president of the Resolution Resource Group, Dr. Guinn has worked with Fortune 500 companies, government organizations, and teams across industries to help them navigate complex disputes and build stronger relationships. He is the co-author of How to Get Along with Anyone: The Playbook for Predicting and Preventing Conflict at Work and Home, where he shares practical strategies for managing conflict before it escalates.  Join us for an insightful conversation with Dr. Jim Guinn as he unpacks the keys to mastering conflict in both personal and professional settings. Why do emotions often derail rational thinking in high-stakes disagreements? How can understanding different conflict styles transform the way we navigate challenges at work and in relationships? Dr. Guinn shares powerful techniques for predicting, preventing, and resolving conflict, drawing from years of experience mediating everything from corporate disputes to family dynamics. Discover how to identify core issues, adapt to others' communication styles, and foster collaboration to achieve win-win outcomes.  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What is How to Get Along with Anyone, and how can it help you improve both personal and professional relationships? What is mediation, and why is it often a last resort in disputes? What are the biggest misconceptions about difficult people in conflict? The 5 Conflict Styles – 00:06:31 What are the five core conflict styles, and how do they differ? How can you identify your own conflict style and that of others? Why is adapting your approach to match the other person's style critical for success? Techniques for Managing High-Emotion Conflict – 00:13:48 How does the Voice Technique work to de-escalate tense situations? What is the Detour Technique, and how can it uncover the core issues in a conflict? Why is managing your own emotional triggers key to effective conflict resolution? Predicting and Preventing Conflict – 00:24:03 How can understanding communication patterns help prevent future disputes? What are the three types of conflict—task, process, and relational—and why is identifying them important? How can leaders use conflict styles to build balanced and effective teams? Resolving Conflict with the Domino and Momentum Techniques – 00:44:49 What is the Domino Technique, and when should it be used? Why is the Momentum Technique better suited for certain personalities? How can self-awareness of your own conflict triggers make you a better leader? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Ready to start your ecommerce business? Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/charm. Grow your business–no matter what stage you're in. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Resources from this Episode How to Get Along with Anyone: The Playbook for Predicting and Preventing Conflict at Work and at Home The Conflict Docs website Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the art of confident, compelling communication with Michael Chad Hoeppner, an expert in public speaking and personal development. As the founder and CEO of GK Training, Michael has spent over 15 years coaching leaders, including presidential candidates, Fortune 500 CEOs, and Ivy League deans, to deliver their messages with impact and authenticity. He's also the author of Don't Say Um: How to Communicate Effectively to Live a Better Life, a groundbreaking guide that shifts the focus from content to delivery. Introduction – 00:00:00 Why is delivery more critical than ever in today's AI-driven world? What is the 3F system (Fake it, Feature it, Fix it), and how can it help you recover gracefully during high-stakes communication? Why is agility in communication more important than avoiding mistakes entirely? How can pausing strategically improve clarity and confidence in your delivery? Eliminating Filler Words and Building Confidence – 00:10:03 Why do filler words like “um” and “uh” increase in high-pressure situations, and how can you address them? What is the "perception vs. reality gap," and why do our internal clocks often misjudge pauses? How can recording yourself and analyzing evidence help identify and correct communication habits? What common advice should you avoid if you want to be a better public speaker?  Storytelling as a Career-Accelerating Tool – 00:33:08 Why is storytelling critical for building personal and professional influence? How can creating a "story bank" of go-to anecdotes make you a more effective communicator? What's the difference between telling and showing in storytelling, and why is the latter more impactful? Practical Exercises for Improving Communication – 00:42:14 What are kinesthetic learning techniques, and how can they improve your public speaking? How does the LEGO block exercise create concise and clear communication habits? Why does practicing with physical impediments (like a toothbrush) improve enunciation and delivery? AI's Impact on Communication – 00:50:33 How might AI make in-person communication a more valuable and sought-after skill? What are the limitations of AI in mimicking human spontaneity and agility in communication? How can AI tools assist in role-playing scenarios to help practice interviews and presentations? A Word From Our Sponsors Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don't miss out on a network of opportunities! Ready to start your ecommerce business? Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/charm. Grow your business–no matter what stage you're in. Curious about your influence level?  Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy! Resources from this Episode Don't Say Um: How to Communicate Effectively to Live a Better Life Michael Chad Hoeppner's LinkedIn GK Training Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the art of exceptional communication and the traits that set extraordinary individuals apart with Joe Navarro, a globally recognized expert in nonverbal communication and human behavior. As a retired FBI Special Agent, Joe spent over 25 years mastering the ability to decode body language and behavioral cues in high-stakes situations. Since his retirement, he has authored multiple international bestsellers, including What Every Body Is Saying and The Dictionary of Body Language, which have become essential reading for professionals across industries. Joe's latest book, Be Exceptional: Master the Five Traits That Set Extraordinary People Apart, provides actionable insights for those looking to elevate their personal and professional lives. Join us for a compelling conversation with Joe Navarro as he unpacks the essential traits that define truly exceptional individuals and explores how we can cultivate them in our own lives. What makes someone stand out in a way that leaves others feeling inspired and empowered? How can observation, self-mastery, and the art of validation transform not only our personal relationships but also our professional success? Drawing from decades of experience as an FBI Special Agent and a leading expert in nonverbal communication, Joe shares profound insights into human behavior and offers practical strategies to become the kind of person others are drawn to. Discover how to elevate your communication, unlock your potential, and start building the habits that will set you apart in today's fast-paced, competitive world. What to Listen For Introduction – [00:00:00] Who is Joe Navarro, and how did his career with the FBI shape his expertise in nonverbal communication? What inspired Joe to write Be Exceptional, and how does he define being exceptional? Why does Joe believe universities and traditional education systems don't teach what truly matters for success? The Five Traits of Exceptional People – [00:02:21] What are the five traits that Joe identifies as the cornerstone of being exceptional? How do self-mastery and observation form the foundation for personal growth and impactful relationships? Why is it critical to focus outward and cultivate "benign curiosity" to connect with others authentically? Self-Mastery as a Lifelong Journey – [00:15:44] Why does Joe describe self-mastery as an ongoing process rather than a destination? What practical steps can listeners take to build self-mastery and prepare for future challenges? How can scaffolding small wins in everyday life lead to significant growth over time? The Power of Observation – [00:25:57] How has modern technology dulled our ability to observe others effectively? What are the key components of great observation, and how can they enhance communication and connection? Why is observation essential for understanding the needs, desires, and fears of others? Validation as a Superpower – [00:35:19] Why is validation one of the most overlooked yet impactful aspects of communication? How can you validate others without sacrificing your own opinions or becoming overly agreeable? What are the long-term consequences of failing to validate others in professional and personal relationships? Building Exceptional Relationships – [00:38:31] How can understanding the "why" behind people's behaviors deepen relationships and build trust? What role does curiosity play in creating meaningful connections and expanding your perspective? Why is being present and focused on others the ultimate key to making an impact? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we dive into the science of managing conflict and building resilience with Bob Bordone and Joel Salinas, two thought leaders in negotiation and emotional intelligence. Bob Bordone, a senior fellow and former professor at Harvard Law School, is the founder of the Harvard Negotiation and Mediation Clinical Program. Joel Salinas, a neurologist at Massachusetts General Hospital and an instructor at Harvard Medical School, brings a unique perspective from his research in brain science and social connection. Together, they coauthored Conflict Resilience: Negotiating Disagreement Without Giving Up or Giving In, a groundbreaking book that redefines how we approach conflict, not as something to fear but as a powerful opportunity for growth. Join us for an eye-opening conversation with negotiation expert Bob Bordone and neurologist Joel Salinas as they unravel the complex dynamics of conflict and emotional resilience. Why does conflict feel so uncomfortable, and how can we reframe it as an opportunity for growth? How do our brains influence our reactions in high-stakes disagreements, and what strategies can we use to navigate even the toughest conversations? Bob and Joel combine their expertise in negotiation, brain science, and emotional intelligence to offer actionable tools for managing tension, building conflict resilience, and fostering deeper connections in both personal and professional settings. Discover how mastering these skills can enhance your relationships, elevate your leadership, and transform the way you approach challenges. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why do they see conflict as an opportunity for growth rather than something to fear? The Science of Conflict and Emotional Triggers – 00:05:07 Why does conflict trigger the same brain mechanisms as physical pain? How can pausing and breathing help re-engage the rational parts of the brain during conflict? What are the first steps to managing emotional triggers in high-stakes disagreements? Naming the Core Issues Behind Conflict – 00:10:37 What does “naming” mean in the context of conflict resilience, and how does it transform conversations? Why is it important to identify and express the emotions underlying a disagreement? How can naming your feelings help de-escalate tension and get to the heart of the problem? The Power of Emotional Vocabulary – 00:16:53 Why do many people struggle to articulate their feelings, especially men? How does a richer emotional vocabulary lead to better conflict outcomes? What practical exercises can help you expand your emotional awareness? Balancing Self and Others in Conflict – 00:30:48 How can highly empathetic individuals set healthy boundaries without feeling guilty? What are the challenges of balancing your own needs with the needs of others? Why is it essential to prepare for how others might react when you assert your needs? Building Conflict Resilience – 00:33:29 What is conflict resilience, and how does it differ from conflict resolution? Why is resilience a prerequisite for effective negotiation and communication? How can you cultivate the mindset and skills to stay present and engaged during disagreements? Creating a Greenhouse for Conflict Resilience – 00:43:12 Why do hostile environments make it harder to engage constructively in conflict? What can leaders do to foster a culture that supports conflict resilience? How does the organization Seeds of Peace inspire young leaders to navigate conflict? Honing Curiosity and Avoiding Misjudgments – 00:47:00 How can curiosity help you uncover the true motivations behind someone's actions? Why do we often misinterpret others' identities and intentions in conflict? What techniques can help you think beyond your own perspective and stay curious longer? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we are bringing you a compilation of moments from the best interviews of 2024, covering everything from emotional mastery to productivity, building relationships, leadership, overcoming challenges, and living with purpose. Join us for a dynamic journey through some of the most impactful conversations from the past year, featuring insights from world-class experts across business, psychology, and personal development. How can understanding emotions transform your relationships? Why is slow productivity the key to long-term success? What role does empathy play in navigating workplace dynamics? In this special episode, we unpack these themes and more, and our hosts, Johnny Dzubak and AJ Harbinger, tie it all together with actionable takeaways to inspire, motivate, and transform your life. Don't miss this opportunity to reflect on the hidden forces shaping your behavior and uncover strategies to elevate your relationships, career, and purpose. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why is this episode a must-listen for those seeking personal and professional growth? Emotional Mastery and Relationships – 00:02:16 Why is emotional vocabulary essential for self-awareness and deeper connections, according to Karla McLaren? How does labeling emotions help regulate them and improve relationships? What role does jealousy play as a “relational radar,” and how can it guide your behavior? Workplace Dynamics and Empathy – 00:14:26 How does empathy shape team dynamics, as explained by Dr. Tessa West? Why are networking and understanding workplace hierarchies critical for career success? What common missteps do professionals make when navigating workplace relationships? Redefining Productivity – 00:16:18 What is Cal Newport's concept of slow productivity, and how does it challenge traditional workplace norms? How can focusing on quality over activity help you avoid burnout and achieve more meaningful results? Why does pseudo-productivity dominate knowledge work, and how can you break free? Habits and Communication – 00:24:41 How can small preparatory actions, like setting intentions, drastically reduce workplace conflict? Why is self-awareness essential for creating effective communication habits? Winning the Work vs. Doing the Work – 00:28:27 What's the difference between delivering work and developing business relationships, according to Mo Bunnell? Why do skills that make you an expert often conflict with those needed to grow professionally? How can you master the shift to winning work while maintaining your technical expertise? High Performance and Resilience – 00:30:22 What are the key principles of performance psychology shared by Eric Potterat, inspired by Navy SEALs? Why is adaptability just as important as grit, according to Ross White? How can psychological flexibility help you navigate life's challenges and enhance performance? Overcoming Inner Challenges – 00:38:59 How does understanding personal baggage influence relationships and decision-making? Why is self-awareness crucial for achieving personal growth and happiness? Living with Purpose – 00:41:57 How does Jodi Wellman encourage us to confront mortality as a motivator for living fully? How can reflecting on your limited time inspire you to take action today? Unlocking the Unsaid – 00:45:54 Why do people often withhold valuable insights in relationships, according to Jeff Witzler? How can asking better questions deepen your connections and uncover hidden truths? What are the fears and barriers that prevent open communication, and how can you overcome them? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the transformative power of defiance and the role it plays in aligning with our values with Dr. Sunita Sah, a renowned expert in decision-making and organizational psychology. A professor, speaker, and consultant, Dr. Sah empowers leaders to navigate complex ethical landscapes and make principled choices. As the author of Defy: The Power of No in a World That Demands Yes, she redefines what it means to stand up for your values, offering practical tools to resist undue influence and cultivate moral courage.  Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Dr. Sunita Sah as she redefines what it means to say "no" in a world that pressures us to say "yes." Why do we so often comply with demands that go against our values? How can we cultivate the courage to resist undue influence while staying true to ourselves? Dr. Sah delves into the psychology of defiance, the societal impact of compliance, and the powerful ripple effects of standing up for what matters most. Learn how to align your actions with your core values, navigate social pressure with confidence, and become a moral maverick in both your personal and professional life. Discover actionable strategies to unlock the transformative power of principled defiance and reshape the world around you. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why is defiance often misunderstood, and how can it be a proactive force for positive change? What is Dr. Sah's new definition of defiance, and how does it differ from traditional perceptions? Why is acting in accordance with your values crucial in resisting social pressure? How do everyday acts of compliance and dissent shape society at large? Understanding Social Pressure and Compliance – 00:06:09 How does societal conditioning teach us to equate compliance with goodness? What is insinuation anxiety, and how does it inhibit people from resisting bad advice? Why do so many professionals, from healthcare workers to airline crew members, hesitate to speak up in critical situations? The Defiance Compass: A Framework for Decision-Making – 00:18:45 What are the five elements required for true defiance, and how do they align with the concept of informed consent? How can identifying your core values and understanding a situation help you determine when to defy? What are the psychological and physical costs of living out of alignment with your values? How does chronic compliance lead to burnout, stress, and regret? Why is acknowledging and addressing your internal tension a critical step toward principled defiance? Building the Courage to Defy – 00:28:09 How can practicing defiance in low-stakes situations help you build the confidence to act in higher-stakes moments? Why is visualization and scripting important for preparing to act on your values? How can asking clarifying questions like “What do you mean by that?” create powerful ripple effects in group dynamics? Becoming a Moral Maverick – 00:46:04 What does it mean to be a moral maverick, and how can practicing defiance create lasting change? How do small acts of principled defiance lead to greater personal fulfillment and societal impact? What mindset shifts are required to stop equating compliance with being good and embrace defiance as a positive force? How can understanding and practicing principled defiance improve your personal and professional relationships? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the science of human decision-making and behavior with Dan Ariely, a world-renowned expert in psychology and behavioral economics. As the James B. Duke Professor of Psychology and Behavioral Economics at Duke University, Dan has dedicated his career to uncovering the irrational patterns that drive our decisions. He's the author of multiple bestselling books, including Predictably Irrational, The Upside of Irrationality, and The Honest Truth About Dishonesty, where he explores the predictable mistakes we make and how understanding them can lead to better outcomes in life, business, and relationships.  Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Dan Ariely as he explores the hidden biases and patterns that influence our decisions, from everyday choices to life-altering moments. Why do we often invest more time deciding on small purchases than major life decisions? How does regret shape our behavior, and why do we favor inaction over action? Dan shares powerful insights into the psychological forces at play in our decision-making, the tension between market and social norms, and how to build habits and environments that support better outcomes.  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What is regret, and how does it bias us toward inaction over action? How did Dan's experience in the hospital lead to groundbreaking research on irrational behaviors? Why do people spend more time on medium-sized decisions than life-changing ones like marriage or buying a house? What does Dan's research reveal about indecision and its long-term costs? Overcoming Indecision and the Role of Regret – 00:07:24 How does regret influence our tendency to avoid taking action? What mental strategies can we use to frame decisions more effectively and reduce indecision? Why is setting a deadline a critical tool for making tough choices? Building Habits and Simplifying Decisions – 00:17:45 Why is it essential to focus on process rather than outcome when evaluating decisions? How can creating rituals and habits reduce decision fatigue and lead to better outcomes? What are Dan's personal strategies for avoiding temptation and building productive habits? Market Norms vs. Social Norms – 00:31:56 What are market norms and social norms, and why do they often conflict? How can introducing financial incentives harm social motivations? Why is it difficult to shift back to social norms once market norms dominate a relationship? Trust, Relationships, and Long-Term Success – 00:40:02 How does trust develop in long-term relationships, and why does it thrive under social norms? What role does empathy play in fostering trust and cooperation? Why are open-ended interactions more effective at building trust than transactional exchanges? Actionable Insights for Better Decision-Making – 00:46:00 How can we overcome regret, procrastination, and indecision in daily life? Why should we prioritize the quality of our decision-making process over the unpredictability of outcomes? What steps can leaders take to cultivate trust and align their organizations with social norms? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we show you the cheat code to building deep relationships with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael.  Discover the secret language of connection in today's episode as AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael dive into the concept of emotional bids — the small, powerful moments that make or break our relationships. Why are emotional bids so vital to our personal and professional lives? How can we recognize them, and what happens when we ignore them? AJ and Johnny break down the science of emotional bids, share practical strategies to strengthen your connections, and reveal how simple shifts in awareness can transform the way you interact with others. Whether you're looking to deepen your personal relationships or enhance your influence at work, this episode is packed with actionable insights to help you build lasting, meaningful bonds. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What are emotional bids, and how do they serve as subtle invitations to connect? Why do so many relationships fail due to a lack of awareness about emotional bids? Why is recognizing emotional bids a critical skill for relationship success? How does ignoring your partner's emotional bids lead to disconnection and eventually the end of the relationship? The Science of Emotional Bids – 0:07:30 How can you predict the success or failure of a relationship based on 3 minutes of interaction? What role does active listening play in identifying emotional bids during everyday conversations? Why is it essential to focus on the emotions behind the words, rather than just the words themselves? What strategies can make you more memorable and likable after just one conversation?  How to Identify Emotional Bids – 0:18:48 What exactly is an emotional bid and how do you recognize them in conversation or in your relationship? What are the Most Common Emotional Bids? – 0:27:30 What are common types of emotional bids, such as bids for attention or emotional support? What does it mean to "turn toward" an emotional bid, and why is it the foundation of lasting relationships? How can "turning away" or "turning against" emotional bids contribute to relationship breakdowns? What are the three ways to respond to emotional bids, and which response guarantees failure? Leverage Emotional Bids for the Strongest Relationship – 0:48:02 What simple exercises can help you become more aware of emotional bids in your daily interactions? How can a lack of attention to emotional bids lead to divorce or long-term relationship issues? Why do emotional bids reflect vulnerability, and how does responding positively encourage deeper connection and trust? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we talk about the value of tribalism with Michael Morris, the Chavkin-Chang Professor of Leadership at Columbia Business School and a Professor of Psychology at Columbia University. A renowned expert in leadership, negotiation, and cultural psychology, he has published over 200 articles in leading journals and recently released his book Tribal, exploring how leaders can harness shared cultural identities to unite and mobilize teams.  Join us for a thought-provoking conversation about the profound role of tribalism in shaping civilization and fostering healthy societies. Why is tribalism more than just a relic of the past? How does the social brain hypothesis explain our innate drive to connect and form groups? Michael Morris sheds light on how human mimicry sets us apart from other species, why tribalism has become such a heated topic, and how it can create vastly different perceptions of reality among people we interact with daily. Discover how politicians leverage tribalism to gain influence, when it becomes toxic to society, and the best ways to navigate relationships in a world divided by differing values.  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why is tribalism a blessing to civilization and a healthy society? What is the social brain hypothesis and how does it impact you tribally? The Hardwiring of Tribalism in Your Brain – 00:12:44 What are the 3 instincts that are hardwired into your brain? How does tribalism protect you, your family, your culture, and nation? How does mimicry set humans apart from other animals that also exhibit mimicry? The Big Deal of Tribalism – 00:23:46 Why and when did tribalism become a controversial topic? Why do certain tribes have such different values?  How Tribalism Shapes Your Worldview – 00:30:17 How can tribalism create a completely different perception of reality from people you interact with everyday? What factors influence the development or destruction of a tribe? Tribalism, Politics, and Grass Roots Movements – 00:41:34 How do politicians leverage tribalism to gain popularity and influence? At what point does tribalism become toxic to a society and what's the best way to handle it when you know people in other tribes? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the transformative power of entrepreneurship and the ownership mindset with Codie Sanchez, an innovative investor, entrepreneur, and author. Codie is the visionary behind Main Street Millionaire, a groundbreaking book that redefines wealth creation by focusing on acquiring small, profitable businesses instead of starting from scratch. With a background in finance and years of experience at powerhouse firms like Goldman Sachs and Vanguard, Codie has become a leading voice in the art of creative deal-making and sustainable business growth. She's helped thousands transition from the 9-to-5 grind to financial freedom, leveraging strategies that prioritize cash flow, scalability, and lifestyle design.  Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Codie Sanchez as she reveals the untapped potential of acquiring small, profitable businesses to build financial freedom and a life of purpose. What makes buying an existing business less risky—and often more lucrative—than starting one from scratch? How can shifting from an employee to an owner mindset transform your career and lifestyle? Codie dives into the strategies and mindset shifts needed to uncover undervalued opportunities, negotiate creative deals, and scale businesses to achieve cash flow and equity growth. Whether you're an aspiring entrepreneur or a seasoned professional looking to make a leap, this episode is packed with actionable insights to help you think like an owner, build wealth, and take control of your future. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What does Codie see as the deeper purpose behind entrepreneurship and financial independence? How can you shift from thinking like an employee to thinking like an owner? What limiting beliefs hold people back from pursuing entrepreneurship, and how can they overcome them? The Power of Small, Profitable Businesses – 00:10:44 How can you uncover undervalued businesses and transform them into lucrative opportunities? Why is it essential to learn from others' experience, and how can “stealing” their 10,000 hours accelerate your journey? How can creative deal structures make owning a business more accessible than most people think? Building Wealth Through Acquisitions – 00:17:42 How can strategic acquisitions help you grow your income, expand your customer base, or attract top talent? Why does Codie believe buying multiple small businesses compounds both wealth and freedom? What steps can you take to apply the “rich” framework (Research, Invest, Command, Harness) in your journey to business ownership? Finding Your First Business to Buy – 00:30:17 What should you look for in your first acquisition to ensure it's a wise investment? In what ways can leveraging your skills and network make the difference in finding the right business to buy? Why do “boring” businesses often lead to higher profits and lower competition? What should you look for in a potential business partner and mentor? Where should you look to get great deals on businesses for sale? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we cover the art of negotiation, power dynamics, and effective leadership with Dr. Alison Fragale, a leading authority in organizational behavior. As a distinguished professor at the Kenan-Flagler Business School at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, Alison has dedicated her career to understanding how individuals acquire and exercise power and status within organizations. She is the author of the insightful new book, "Likeable Badass: How Women Get the Success They Deserve," combining her rich academic background with real-world applications, Alison empowers women to assert themselves authentically and achieve their career goals.  Join us for an insightful conversation with Dr. Alison Fragale as she unveils the hidden dynamics of power and status that shape our careers and personal lives. Discover how to balance assertiveness with likability, gain respect without compromising your true self, and build authentic status—even if you're new to an organization or battling imposter syndrome. Alison offers actionable strategies to inspire others to advocate on your behalf, navigate conversations that elevate your influence, and become a more impactful leader in your career and beyond. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What inspired Alison Fragale to develop an interest in organizational psychology? Why understanding the difference between power and status is crucial for building a fulfilling career and personal life. How do you acquire status and then leverage it to gain power? The Catch 22 of Acquiring Power – 00:07:55 What do most people get wrong about what it takes to gain power in your professional and personal life? Can you be true to yourself if you are trying to acquire status and power? The Secret to Balancing Assertiveness with Likability – 00:20:48 What is the key to being respected? How can you be assertive without making people dislike you? What strategy can you use to build your status authentically? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we uncover the secrets of leadership and team dynamics with Patrick Lencioni, a renowned expert in organizational health and teamwork. As the founder and president of The Table Group, Patrick has spent decades helping leaders build stronger organizations through practical tools and strategies. He's the author of numerous bestselling books, including The Five Dysfunctions of a Team and his latest, The Six Types of Working Genius: A Better Way to Understand Your Gifts, Your Frustrations, and Your Team.  Get ready for an eye-opening conversation with Patrick Lencioni as he unpacks the powerful framework behind The Six Types of Working Genius. What if the key to unlocking your true potential—and that of your team—lies in understanding the types of work that energize and frustrate you? Patrick shares his groundbreaking model for identifying your natural talents, improving collaboration, and reducing burnout in every aspect of life, from your career to your relationships. We'll explore how these six types of genius impact team dynamics, decision-making, and personal growth, and how embracing your strengths can lead to greater productivity and fulfillment. Whether you're a leader or simply looking to work smarter, this episode is packed with practical insights to help you thrive. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:34 What inspired Patrick Lencioni to develop The Six Types of Working Genius framework? How did personal struggles at work lead Patrick to uncover the six types of genius? Why understanding your working genius is crucial for building a fulfilling career and personal life. The Six Types of Working Genius Explained – 00:04:41 What are the six types of working genius, and how do they relate to the phases of any project? How can identifying your working frustrations help prevent burnout and dissatisfaction? Why does every successful team need a balance of all six geniuses? Applying Working Genius to Team Dynamics – 00:10:13 How can leaders use this framework to optimize team collaboration and performance? What steps can you take to identify and leverage each team member's genius? How did a real-world software company transform its innovation process using this model? Overcoming Miscommunication and Conflict – 00:19:33 How can understanding your working genius improve communication in personal relationships? What are the common misconceptions about other people's work styles, and how can this framework resolve them? Why do working frustrations often lead to conflict, and how can teams overcome this? Practical Applications Beyond the Workplace – 00:27:02 How can The Six Types of Working Genius help with tasks like planning a vacation or running a household? Why understanding your genius is the next evolution beyond love languages in personal relationships. How can couples use this framework to reduce stress and improve collaboration at home? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the importance of community spaces and their role in fostering connection and resilience with Aaron Greiner, a pioneering voice in urban design and social infrastructure. As the executive director of CultureHouse, Aaron has transformed underutilized spaces into vibrant “third places” that bring people together, encourage social interaction, and strengthen community ties. With hands-on experience in urban planning and a passion for creating welcoming, inclusive environments, Aaron has been at the forefront of redefining how we view public spaces in urban areas.  Join us for an insightful conversation with Aaron Greiner as he explores the vital role of “third places” in reconnecting our communities and fostering genuine human interaction in a world increasingly dominated by digital connections. How can we reclaim public spaces as hubs for social connection? What are the hidden health and societal benefits of accessible community spaces? Aaron shares his experience transforming vacant storefronts into vibrant pop-ups, discusses the urgent need for social infrastructure, and reveals why gathering spaces are more crucial than ever for individual and collective resilience. Discover actionable ideas to create your own third place, connect with neighbors, and foster a stronger, more supportive community. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What inspired Aaron Greiner to focus on third places and create CultureHouse? How do third spaces differ from traditional public spaces, and why are they essential for community well-being? What challenges did Aaron face when starting CultureHouse, and how has the organization evolved over time? The Role of Third Places in Society – 00:03:14 What are “third places,” and how do they foster social connection and community? Why have traditional third places, like dive bars and cafes, declined, and what does it mean for social infrastructure? How does the setup of a third place affect how people interact and connect? The Importance of Social Infrastructure – 00:07:28 How does Aaron define social infrastructure, and why is it vital to society? Why did Aaron choose a popup model for CultureHouse's third places, and what benefits does this approach provide? What impact do third places have on local communities, especially those with limited access to public spaces? The Pandemic's Impact on Community Spaces – 00:08:50 How did COVID-19 exacerbate issues with social isolation and third places? What role did commercial spaces play in social infrastructure before the pandemic, and how has that shifted? How do communities with strong social infrastructure fare better during crises? Research and Evidence Supporting Third Places – 00:10:20 What research highlights the life-and-death impact of social infrastructure in times of crisis? How does the decline in social clubs and organizations contribute to societal division? What can we learn from urban design in cities like Copenhagen to improve third spaces in the U.S.? Suburbanization and Its Effects on Connection – 00:13:41 How has suburbanization and car dependency impacted Americans' ability to connect with each other? What challenges do suburban layouts present for building social infrastructure? How does urban design in Europe foster a greater sense of community compared to the U.S.? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the transformative power of psychological flexibility with Dr. Ross White, an award-winning clinical psychologist and a leader in mental resilience and high-performance coaching. Currently a professor of clinical psychology at Queen's University Belfast and founder of Strive to Thrive, Dr. White specializes in helping individuals and organizations unlock their potential while safeguarding mental well-being. His latest book, The Tree That Bends: How a Flexible Mind Can Help You Thrive, challenges the relentless “no-limits” mindset and presents a balanced approach to personal growth, integrating acceptance, commitment therapy, and mindfulness. Join us for a compelling conversation with Dr. Ross White as we explore the power of psychological flexibility in achieving true resilience and mental well-being. How can we balance the grit needed for high performance with the adaptability essential for sustainable growth? Dr. White discusses the “get, threat, and reset” modes that guide our energy and performance, revealing how psychological flexibility can protect us from burnout while enhancing success. Discover actionable insights into balancing ambition with rest, redefining mental toughness, and navigating the social pressures that drive relentless striving. This episode offers a new approach to thriving under pressure, helping you to achieve both performance and well-being in your personal and professional life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What are the “get, threat, and reset” modes that drive our mental energy and resilience? How does Dr. Ross White's background in clinical psychology influence his approach to high performance and mental well-being? What can listeners expect from Dr. White's latest book, The Tree That Bends, on balancing ambition with self-care? Redefining Resilience: Beyond Grit – 00:04:28 Why can grit sometimes be a barrier rather than a strength in high-stress environments? What does “thriving” truly mean according to Dr. White, and how does it balance both well-being and performance? How can persistence become counterproductive, and what role does adaptability play in reaching our goals? The Power of Psychological Flexibility in High-Performance Settings – 00:07:49 What is the importance of adaptability for executives, athletes, and other high achievers in preventing burnout? How can the “get, threat, and reset” framework help maintain peak performance while prioritizing mental health? Why should high performers balance drive with self-awareness and adaptability? Embracing Limits and Building Purpose – 00:13:00 What are “when-then” traps, and how can they hinder long-term fulfillment? How does Dr. White recommend redefining success to include well-being and self-care? Why is it vital to build purpose that aligns with personal values, rather than societal expectations? Harnessing Psychological Flexibility to Reduce Stress – 00:19:28 What is “psychological flexibility,” and how can it help us handle life's stressors with greater resilience? How does comparing oneself to social media “highlight reels” fuel burnout, and what are healthier alternatives? Why is cultivating personal values a cornerstone of thriving under pressure? Techniques for Emotional Awareness and Anchoring – 00:33:41 How can techniques like the “roving reporter” exercise help us detach from negative thought patterns? What is “anchoring,” and why is it essential for managing challenging emotions? Why is emotional awareness crucial for navigating stress and making effective decisions? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss anxiety and worry with Ben Eckstein, a leading expert in the treatment of anxiety and rumination. As the owner and director of Bull City Anxiety and OCD Treatment Center, Ben specializes in helping individuals break free from cycles of overthinking and distress. He brings a wealth of clinical experience and knowledge as a therapist, speaker, and author of Worrying is Optional: Break the Cycle of Anxiety and Rumination That Keeps You Stuck, where he explores practical strategies for managing anxiety and reclaiming peace of mind. Through his work, Ben aims to empower others to build balanced lives that align with their values, offering actionable insights for anyone struggling with anxiety. Join us for an insightful conversation with Ben Eckstein as we explore the nature of anxiety, worry, and the mental traps that keep us stuck in cycles of rumination. What drives our constant need to overthink, and how can we shift our relationship with worry to regain control of our lives? Ben shares his expertise on distinguishing between helpful and unhelpful thoughts, the factors that contribute to anxiety, and practical approaches for managing it effectively. Discover actionable strategies to break free from overthinking, cultivate a balanced mindset, and build a life aligned with your values. Learn how to transform worry from a barrier into a tool for growth and resilience in both your personal and professional life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What is worry, and how can you tell when it becomes a problem in your life? Why do some people worry more than others, and what role do genetics and environment play in anxiety? How can you differentiate between worrying as a habit and worrying as a productive response? Controlling Worry vs. Accepting It – 00:05:26 Why is it important to distinguish between “worry” as a noun and “worrying” as a verb? What aspects of worry are within our control, and when is it best to let go? How can identifying whether a problem is solvable or unsolvable help reduce anxiety? Building a Healthier Relationship with Worry – 00:11:10 What does it mean to have a relationship with worry, and how can you assess whether yours is healthy? Why might some positive beliefs about worry actually perpetuate anxiety? How can reframing your thoughts about worry lead to greater mental freedom? Tools and Techniques to Manage Worry – 00:18:04 What strategies can help you become more aware of your worry patterns? How can scheduling “worry time” or saying worries out loud help diminish their power? Why is practicing attention control essential for breaking the cycle of rumination? Accepting Uncertainty – 00:30:03 How can you develop a “good enough” threshold when seeking certainty? Why is embracing uncertainty an important skill, and what role does acceptance play in managing anxiety? What exercises can help you practice accepting uncertainty in daily life? Helping Others Who Worry – 00:42:55 How can you support a friend or family member who struggles with chronic worry? Why does offering reassurance often fall short, and what are more effective alternatives? What can you do to validate someone's feelings while encouraging them to build resilience? Replacing Worry with Productive Actions – 00:53:55 What should you replace worry with, and how can you identify healthier coping mechanisms? How can perspective-taking and looking back at past worries help reduce current anxiety? Why is it crucial to find constructive activities that fulfill the same needs that worrying addresses? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we cover overcoming procrastination and loneliness at work with Adam Grant. Adam is a top-rated professor at the Wharton School, the host of the awesome Worklife podcast, and is the author of “Give and Take”, one of his four New York Times bestselling books. Procrastination is associated with laziness by many, but the science shows us otherwise - so if procrastinators aren't lazy then why do we assume they are, what can you do about your procrastination if you want to change it, and why is now the best time to overcome your procrastination habit?   What to Listen For What can you do today to overcome your procrastination habits? How do we redesign jobs that now have to operate from a distance? Why is it more challenging to work remotely and what can you do to overcome them so you don't lose your job? What questions can you ask someone to help them figure out what motivates them so you can help them become a happier and more productive employee? What can we do as leaders to help our coworkers and employees grapple with the loneliness that accompanies working from home for many people? What is one of the most powerful antidotes to loneliness that we can give people any time? What simple exercise can you go through with your employees or coworkers to immediately improve their creativity and productivity? What can you do to immediately win the battle over procrastination while you're working from home? How can you break down your procrastination into understandable chunks so you can easily overcome them? What does the science say about the ideal workplace environment so you can make your office more conducive to your work? What should we be most concerned about as we come out of this quarantine and will we be able to return to normal? If you find yourself procrastinating, it's not necessarily a problem with your work ethic, but can certainly be a problem with your ability to regulate your emotions. When confronted with a task that makes you feel uncomfortable (angry, uncertainty, frustrated, annoyed, anxious, etc), procrastination can kick in to help you avoid feeling those things. So what can you do to mitigate these responses and overcome your procrastination before it costs you an awesome opportunity? Tune in to find out! A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Whether you're a professional working at a traditional, home or remote office our new sponsor, Fully, is here to transform your workplace with furniture designed for health, flow and balance. And right now, you can save $50 off the Jarvis standing desk when you visit fully.com/CHARM. Fully—everything you need to make your work flow. Resources from this Episode Adam Grant's website Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success by Adam Grant Core Confidence Worklife - a podcast hosted by Adam Grant Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the dynamics of relationships, empathy, and conflict resolution with Dr. Warren Farrell, a renowned thought leader in gender studies and communication. As the author of multiple bestselling books, including The Boy Crisis and his latest, Role Mate to Soul Mate: The 7 Secrets to Lifelong Love, Dr. Farrell has spent over 30 years teaching couples the art of effective communication. Named one of the world's top 100 thought leaders by the Financial Times, he specializes in helping couples build lasting relationships through empathy, appreciation, and conflict-free communication.  Join us for a compelling conversation with Dr. Warren Farrell as he unpacks the emotional dynamics that define our relationships and the steps we can take to nurture lifelong love. How can we resolve conflicts without escalating defensiveness? What's the secret to creating a conflict-free zone in your relationship? Dr. Farrell shares his deep expertise on how appreciation, empathy, and his transformative 4-step apology can reshape even the most strained relationships. Discover actionable strategies to enhance communication, build deeper emotional connections, and foster a resilient partnership that can weather any storm. Whether you're looking to improve your romantic relationship or strengthen bonds with those closest to you, this episode is packed with practical tips to help you succeed. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What inspired Dr. Warren Farrell to write Role Mate to Soul Mate? How does Dr. Farrell define the difference between a “role mate” and a “soul mate”? What are the common challenges couples face as they transition from passion to routine, and how can they overcome them? Creating a Conflict-Free Zone – 00:06:24 Why is it essential to establish a conflict-free zone in relationships? How does this practice help couples avoid walking on eggshells and promote honest communication? What are the steps involved in the caring and sharing practice that Dr. Farrell recommends? Family Dynamics and Parenting – 00:11:17 How do different parenting philosophies create tension between partners? What is “checks and balance” parenting, and why is it crucial for long-term harmony? How does Dr. Farrell suggest couples manage conflicts regarding child-rearing? The Importance of Regular Appreciation – 00:13:37 Why does regular appreciation help maintain strong relationships? What are the five levels of specificity in appreciation, and how do they deepen emotional connections? How can couples create routines, like weekly date nights, to build appreciation and gratitude into their relationship? The Impact of Modernity on Family Structures – 00:23:01 How does modern society challenge the traditional family structure? What role does the absence of fathers play in the development of boys and girls? Why is the rising rate of single-parent households a product of modern societal shifts? Balancing Career Success with Love – 00:28:21 How do the skills that make you successful at work hinder success in love? What can high-performing professionals do to shift their mindset and improve communication at home? Why is listening, rather than problem-solving, key to strengthening emotional connections? The Importance of Regular Appreciation – 00:35:38 Why does regular appreciation help maintain strong relationships? What are the five levels of specificity in appreciation, and how do they deepen emotional connections? How can couples create routines, like weekly date nights, to build appreciation and gratitude into their relationship? The 4-Step Apology Framework – 00:49:42 What are the four critical components of an effective apology? How can this apology method transform conflict resolution in relationships? Why is tone of voice just as important as the words used in an apology? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we review the greatest hits around building resilience and leveraging social skills to get you closer to your goals, drawing on our insightful conversations with Angela Duckworth, Laura Huang, John Livesay, and Steven Hayes. Life gets rough. It's important to develop good habits while things are going smoothly so when the seas get rough, you have a strong baseline to fall back on. Grit and resilience are integral to your success in life because they make the tough times easier to push through without feeling like the world is collapsing around you. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What is the difference between talent and effort? What is the foundation for reaching your goals and how do you make it strong? What are the two P's you need to push toward your goals? This always beats talent alone – 00:09:48 What should you focus on if you want to be the best and you weren't “born with talent?” How do you maintain your passion in something when you keep failing at it? Breaking down goals to make them easy – 00:14:48 How can you break down goals and objectives in a way that makes them feel easier while also motivating you to stick with them? What can you do to stop getting caught up in the past and focus on the future? How to trust your gut – 00:24:05 What can you do to develop your intuition and learn when to rely on it? What will always outperform hard work in the world we live in now? Why is “just be yourself” terrible advice even though there is a kernel of truth embedded in it? Overcome your fear of rejection today – 00:34:46 What one exercise can you do today to overcome your fear of rejection so you can push forward after every “no” without missing a beat? What is the secret to not taking rejection personally so you can maintain your focus and mood in the face of overwhelming rejection? Stop letting your inner critic dictate your life – 00:41:42 What can you do to release the death grip that your inner critic has on your life so you take risks and chase your big goals without fear of failure? Why do you need to develop competence? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore money and investing with Mark Matson. Mark is an American entrepreneur, author, and innovator in the science of investing and financial education. He creates educational experiences, platforms, and tools that make investing research accessible to investors and transform their relationship with money. His new book, “Experiencing the American Dream: How to Invest Your Time, Energy, and Money to Create an Extraordinary Life” is out now. Mark challenges the traditional definition of the American dream and what many of us get wrong when defining it. Join us for an insightful conversation with Mark Matson as we discuss why money doesn't equal happiness and how more money leads to more stress, why you need to understand academic investment principles to save yourself from gambling your retirement away, how to overcome the scarcity mindset to build your American dream, and what it takes to find your purpose and live an extraordinary life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:28 How does Mark Matson define the American dream differently? What problems does money NOT solve? Identify Your Blindspots with Money – 00:09:03 How do you identify your blindspots with money and then fix them so they don't hinder your success in life? What can you focus on to make ANY amount of money feel like enough? Intelligent Investing vs Stock Gambling – 00:16:15 What behaviors in the stock market make you a gambler vs an investor? Are big investing firms actually great at investing your money or just lucky over the long term? Why is the investing industry broken and can it be fixed? What are the 3 academic investing principles you can apply to mitigate the biggest risks associated with investing? Why Investing Solo Will Lose You Money – 00:27:34 What natural human tendencies make it an uphill battle to succeed as a solo investor and what value does a coach bring to the table? How do you apply the 3 academic investing principles when you're just starting out? The Investing Roadmap to Prosperity– 00:39:01 What is the secret to creating life changing wealth? How do you build financial security and freedom if you don't want to be an entrepreneur?  5 Discoveries That Will Change How You Think About Money – 00:48:22 What 5 facts about investing will change the way you think about money and help prevent you from making huge mistakes? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the world of accelerated learning and skill mastery with Scott Young, a leading expert on self-directed learning and productivity. As the best-selling author of Ultralearning and Get Better at Anything: 12 Maxims for Mastery, Scott has transformed the way people approach acquiring new skills, pushing the boundaries of what's possible through deliberate practice and innovative techniques. Known for his ambitious project of learning MIT's 4-year computer science curriculum in just one year without attending any classes, Scott has dedicated his career to understanding how we can learn faster, overcome our fears, and achieve mastery in any field.  Join us for an insightful conversation with Scott Young as he shares with us the art and science of ultra learning—how we can master new skills at an accelerated pace and break through the barriers that hold us back. What are the most effective ways to learn quickly and efficiently? How can we overcome the fear of failure and the anxiety that often accompanies new challenges? Scott shares his expert insights into the principles of deliberate practice, the importance of feedback, and the myths that often cloud our understanding of talent and ability. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:28 How did Scott Young become a leading expert in self-directed learning and skill mastery? What inspired Scott to tackle the challenge of learning MIT's 4-year computer science curriculum in just one year without attending any classes? What are the core ideas behind Scott's books Ultra Learning and Get Better at Anything, and how can they help you master new skills faster? The Three Pillars of Learning – 00:02:34 What are the three essential steps to mastering any skill? What examples demonstrate that talent often appears effortless due to extensive practice and refinement? How can you apply these insights to push past the limits of what you believe is possible for yourself? Overcoming Fear and Embracing Exposure – 00:10:49 Why is exposure to what you're afraid of critical for overcoming fear and anxiety in learning? How can gradual exposure to challenging situations, like public speaking or cold calling, help reduce fear over time? What are some practical strategies to start applying exposure therapy in your personal and professional life? Unlearning Bad Habits – 00:18:42 What challenges come with unlearning ingrained habits, and how can you effectively replace them with better techniques? How did AJ's experience with unlearning a golf swing illustrate the difficulties and importance of relearning a skill the right way? Why is it sometimes necessary to learn completely new approaches when trying to unlearn bad habits? The Importance of Simplification in Early Learning – 00:22:21 How does starting with simplified versions of a skill help accelerate the learning process? What can we learn from flight simulators about the benefits of practicing in a controlled, simplified environment before facing real-world challenges? Why does beginning with the basics lay a stronger foundation for mastering more complex skills later on? The Value of Variable Practice – 00:28:04 How does variable practice, or mixing up different types of practice, enhance learning and adaptability? Why is practicing in varied conditions more effective than repetitive practice, and how can this approach be applied to everyday learning? What are some examples of variable practice that can be used for skills like language learning, sports, or public speaking? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we cover emotions and empathy with Karla McLaren, a renowned expert in emotional intelligence and empathy development. As an award-winning author, educator, and social science researcher, Karla dedicated her career to helping individuals and organizations understand and harness the power of emotions. She developed the "Six Essential Aspects of Empathy" model, which breaks down empathy into accessible and actionable steps, making it possible for everyone to enhance their emotional skills. Karla's books, including "The Language of Emotions," "The Power of Emotions at Work," and "Embracing Anxiety," offer transformative insights into revaluing even the most challenging emotions, turning them into pathways for self-awareness, effective communication, and healthier relationships.  Join us for an enlightening conversation with Karla McLaren as she unpacks the intricate language of emotions and the vital role they play in our daily lives. Ever wondered why certain emotions feel so overpowering or why we struggle to articulate what we're feeling? Karla breaks down the complexities of emotional intelligence and empathy, offering practical tools to expand your emotional vocabulary and improve your communication skills. We explore how emotions are not the enemies of rationality but essential allies in decision-making and relationship-building. Discover how to manage challenging emotions like anger and jealousy, set healthy boundaries, and develop a deeper connection with yourself and others.  What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 Why do we often feel strong negative emotions even in our most loving relationships? How does vulnerability play a crucial role in the intensity of emotions experienced in close relationships? Introduction to Karla McLaren and her journey into exploring the language of emotions and empathy. Understanding Emotions – 00:02:46 What are emotions, and why are they essential to our rationality and decision-making? Why is it unhelpful to label emotions as simply ‘good' or ‘bad'? How does expanding your emotional vocabulary improve your self-awareness and emotional regulation? Building an Emotional Vocabulary – 00:05:28 What are the benefits of having a broader emotional vocabulary? How can identifying the intensity of emotions help you manage them more effectively? Practical steps to enhance your emotional vocabulary and how it can lead to better communication. Anger and Boundaries – 00:16:01 What is the true purpose of anger, and how does it relate to setting boundaries? Common misconceptions about anger and how they can lead to unhealthy expressions or repression. Strategies for managing anger constructively to maintain and reinforce personal boundaries. Resist Emotional Manipulation – 00:27:20 What easy questions can you ask yourself to figure out if/how someone is trying to convince you to do something or think a certain way? The Role of Jealousy – 00:32:36 What triggers jealousy, and why is it considered a crucial social emotion? How to differentiate between healthy jealousy that sets boundaries and unhealthy reactions driven by insecurity. Tips on addressing jealousy in relationships through clear communication and understanding personal needs. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we dive into the psychology of influence and brand growth with Leslie Zane, a pioneer in the field of behavioral science and marketing. As the founder and CEO of Triggers Brand Consulting, Leslie has been at the forefront of helping top brands like Coca-Cola, McDonald's, and Nike accelerate their growth by understanding the subconscious drivers of consumer behavior. With a background that spans behavioral science, marketing, and brand strategy, she is also the author of “The Power of Instinct: The New Rules of Persuasion in Business and Life”, where she reveals how tapping into the instinctive mind can lead to unparalleled success in business and personal branding.  Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Leslie Zane as she reveals the power of the instinctive mind in shaping our decisions and brand preferences. Have you ever wondered why some brands stand out effortlessly while others struggle to make an impact? Leslie uncovers the subconscious drivers that influence our choices and explains how businesses—and individuals—can leverage these insights to gain a competitive edge. Leslie also shares practical tips for crafting a compelling personal brand that resonates on a deeper level. Discover how to tap into the instinctive mind to enhance your influence, master persuasion, and set yourself apart in both your professional and personal life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What drove Leslie Zane to pioneer the field of brand connectomes and behavioral science in marketing? How did Leslie's early career experiences shape her understanding of consumer behavior and influence her approach to brand consulting? What are the key principles behind Leslie's book, The Power of Instinct, and how can they be applied to both personal and business growth? The Instinctive Mind and Brand Connectome – 00:01:55 What is the instinctive mind, and why does it play a more significant role in decision-making than the conscious mind? How does the brand connectome influence consumer choices, and why is it crucial for brands to expand their connectome in consumers' minds? Why do brands need to stand for multiple associations rather than a single attribute to be successful? Building a Personal Brand with Subconscious Triggers – 00:07:22 How can individuals apply the principles of the brand connectome to develop a strong personal brand? What are growth triggers, and how can they be used to build positive associations quickly and effectively? Why is it important to create a holistic personal brand that connects with various aspects of people's subconscious? Overcoming Legacy Brand Challenges – 00:11:49 Why do legacy brands have an inherent advantage, and how can new brands compete effectively? What are some examples of small brands overtaking legacy brands by using strategic triggers and targeted messaging? How can legacy brands continuously evolve their connectome to stay relevant and combat negative associations? Actionable Advice for Personal and Professional Growth – 00:21:55 How can listeners apply Leslie's insights on brand connectomes and subconscious triggers to accelerate their careers and personal growth? What are the critical steps in building a personal brand that resonates with employers, clients, and networks? Why is it essential to control your narrative and make strategic connections between your brand and your target audience? Navigating Negative Associations and Competitive Strategies – 00:29:21 Why are negative associations so powerful, and how can they become significant barriers to brand growth? How can brands effectively address and replace negative associations with positive triggers? What competitive strategies can brands use to leverage the relativity principle and contrast against competitors? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we discuss the hidden forces that shape human behavior and global challenges with Kristian Rönn, a leading thinker in sustainability and evolutionary psychology. As the CEO and cofounder of Normative, Kristian revolutionized how businesses approach sustainability accounting, helping large enterprises achieve their net zero targets. With a rich background in mathematics, philosophy, computer science, and artificial intelligence, he is also the author of "The Darwinian Trap: The Hidden Evolutionary Forces That Explain Our World (and Threaten Our Future)", where he unpacks the evolutionary pitfalls that hinder long-term success and offers insights into how cooperation and high-value behaviors can lead to better decision-making and a brighter future for all. Join us for a thought-provoking conversation with Kristian Rönn as he uncovers the evolutionary forces that silently shape our world and the challenges we face in both personal and global contexts. How do these hidden forces drive human conflict and short-term thinking? What can we do to avoid the Darwinian traps that hinder long-term success? Kristian shares his deep insights into the psychological underpinnings of our behavior, the impact of competitive pressures on society, and the importance of fostering cooperation to create a better future. Discover actionable strategies to navigate these evolutionary pitfalls, enhance your decision-making, and become a more high-value, cooperative leader in your career and beyond. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What sparked Kristian Rönn's passion for understanding the evolutionary forces behind human behavior and global challenges? How did Kristian's journey from Oxford's Future of Humanity Institute to founding Normative shape his perspective on sustainability and global risks? What is the central thesis of Kristian's book, The Darwinian Trap, and why is it crucial for our future? The Darwinian Trap: Evolutionary Forces in Action – 00:06:13 What is the Darwinian Trap, and how does it explain the short-term thinking and conflicts we see in society? How do evolutionary pressures influence everything from nation-state conflicts to personal career competition? What are the "Darwinian demons" we must be aware of, and how can they impact decision-making on both a personal and global level? The Hidden Costs of Short-Term Thinking – 00:24:26 How can short-term evolutionary strategies be both beneficial and harmful in different contexts? What are some real-world examples of how short-term thinking has led to long-term problems, and how can we avoid these pitfalls? Why is it easier to destroy than to build, and how does this concept relate to the challenges we face today? Navigating the Complexities of Modern Society – 00:36:20 How has globalization and the interdependence of nations both helped and hindered global cooperation? Why is decentralized power important in creating a more equitable and cooperative future? Building a Better Future: Cooperation and Governance – 00:45:27 How can we overcome the cooperation failures that drive global conflicts and environmental degradation? What role can reputational markets and decentralized governance play in solving these complex problems? What are the potential dangers of technological advancements, particularly in AI, and how can we manage these risks responsibly? What actionable steps can individuals take to contribute to a more collaborative and sustainable world? Concluding Thoughts and Optimism for the Future – 00:56:23 Despite the challenges, what gives Kristian optimism about the future of humanity and our ability to overcome the Darwinian Trap? How can meditation and introspection help individuals maintain a positive outlook in the face of global challenges? Where can listeners learn more about The Darwinian Trap and Kristian Rönn's work on sustainability and global risks? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the crucial mindset shift from doing the work to winning the work with Mo Bunnell, a renowned business growth expert and founder of the Bunnell Idea Group. With decades of experience helping organizations scale and thrive, Mo has dedicated his career to teaching professionals how to elevate their approach to relationship-building and business development. As the author of "The Snowball System: How to Win More Business and Turn Clients into Raving Fans" and host of the "Real Relationships, Real Revenue" podcast, Mo brings a wealth of knowledge on how small, consistent actions can lead to exponential growth in your career and business.  Join us for an engaging conversation with Mo Bunnell, where he reveals the secrets to shifting from simply doing the work to winning the work in your career. How can you overcome the internal obstacles that hold you back from building meaningful relationships and growing your business? What are the small, consistent habits that can lead to exponential success over time? Mo shares his expert strategies on developing a winning mindset, the art of giving to grow, and the critical shifts in communication that can help you move from being a good performer to a top performer. Discover actionable insights to elevate your career, deepen your professional relationships, and unlock new opportunities in both your business and personal life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What inspired Mo Bunnell to focus on the mindset shift from doing the work to winning the work? How has Mo's extensive experience in business growth shaped his approach to relationship building and business development? What key principles from "Give to Grow" can help you elevate your career and business relationships? The Mindset Shift: Doing the Work vs. Winning the Work – 00:02:16 What is the crucial difference between doing the work and winning the work, and why is it essential for career growth? How can you start thinking 10x, not 1x, to overcome internal fears and embrace opportunities? What are the key habits that successful professionals use to transition from a delivery-focused mindset to a growth-oriented one? Overcoming the Lies That Hold You Back – 00:13:47 What are the five common lies we tell ourselves that hinder our success in relationship building? How can you identify and counteract these lies to maintain momentum in your career? Why is it important to act through discomfort and rejection to achieve long-term success? Integrating Relationship Development with Daily Work – 00:19:47 How can you seamlessly integrate relationship building into your daily tasks without feeling overwhelmed? What are practical examples of small, consistent actions that can lead to significant career growth? How can face-to-face interactions dramatically increase your chances of success in building relationships? The Power of Giving to Grow – 00:31:39 What does it mean to “give to grow,” and how can this mindset transform your professional relationships? How can you provide value even when you feel you have nothing to give? What are the four types of gifts you can offer to deepen relationships and create opportunities? Strategic Giving and Setting Boundaries – 00:43:38 How can you be a strategic giver without getting taken advantage of? What are the boundaries you need to set to ensure that your giving leads to mutual growth? How can asking for small commitments from others help you identify who's worth investing in? Building Habits for Long-Term Success – 00:51:47 How can you create routines and habits that naturally lead to winning the work? What is the importance of maintaining a list of key opportunities and relationships, and how can this practice drive your success? How can focusing on three most important things (MITs) each week create unstoppable momentum in your career? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we dive into the art of productive discourse, the challenges posed by modern technology, and the 10 essential habits of a peacemaker with Steven T. Collis, a distinguished law professor and expert in First Amendment rights. As a scholar dedicated to understanding and navigating the complexities of free speech and religious liberty, Steven has spent years engaging in some of the most contentious topics of our time. His insightful perspectives have been shared across North America, where he educates audiences on the sophisticated tactics used by social media companies to keep us addicted and the importance of intellectual humility in today's polarized world. In this episode, we explore key insights from his upcoming book, "Habits of a Peacemaker," available this September. Join us for an insightful conversation with Steven T. Collis, where he discusses the challenges of modern communication and the critical role of peacemaking in today's polarized society. How can we break free from the habits that social media companies have engineered to keep us addicted and instead foster more productive and meaningful discourse? What are the essential habits that can help us navigate difficult conversations and bridge divides? Steven shares his expert insights on cultivating intellectual humility, the power of real learning, and the surprising ways humor can be a tool for connection. Discover practical strategies to become a more effective peacemaker, enhance your relationships, and contribute to a more respectful and understanding world both online and offline. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 What inspired Steven T. Collis to write "Habits of a Peacemaker" and why is peacemaking more important than ever? How does Steven's background in First Amendment law influence his approach to productive discourse? What challenges do modern technologies, especially social media, pose to our ability to engage in meaningful conversations? The Art of Productive Discourse – 00:03:00 What habits can help you engage in more productive and respectful conversations? How can you overcome the addictive nature of social media to focus on real learning and intellectual humility? Why is it important to seek out differing viewpoints, and how can this practice improve your understanding of complex issues? Social Media's Impact on Communication – 00:10:45 How do social media platforms use psychological techniques from the gambling industry to keep users engaged? What are the dangers of echo chambers and how can they hinder productive discourse? What strategies can you use to protect yourself from the negative effects of social media on your communication habits? Developing Intellectual Humility – 00:16:14 What does it mean to have intellectual humility, and why is it crucial for productive dialogue? How can you reframe conversations to focus on learning rather than debating? Why is it important to recognize the limits of your knowledge, especially when discussing complex topics? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the rise of cynicism, strategies to cultivate hope, and the crucial difference between skepticism and cynicism with Dr. Jamil Zaki, a distinguished professor of psychology at Stanford University and director of the Stanford Social Neuroscience Laboratory. Dr. Zaki has spent nearly two decades studying how people connect with each other, how these connections benefit us, and how we can improve our ability to connect. His groundbreaking research has been featured in top-tier publications such as The New York Times, The Atlantic, and Scientific American. In this episode, we explore insights from his upcoming book, "Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness," available this September. Join us for an engaging conversation with Dr. Jamil Zaki, where he unpacks the rise of cynicism and offers practical strategies to foster hope and trust. How can you recognize and combat your own cynical tendencies in a world that often feels increasingly distrustful? What are the key differences between healthy skepticism and detrimental cynicism? Dr. Zaki shares his expert insights on cultivating a more positive outlook, drawing from his extensive research and groundbreaking work. Discover effective strategies to nurture hope, improve your relationships, and create a more trusting and cooperative environment both personally and professionally. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:00 How does Dr. Jamil Zaki's extensive background in psychology and social neuroscience inform his approach to combating cynicism? What personal experiences inspired Dr. Zaki to focus on the rise of cynicism in his research? How does Dr. Zaki define cynicism and its impact on both personal and professional relationships? Recognizing and Combating Personal Cynicism – 00:06:28 What are the key differences between healthy skepticism and harmful cynicism? What strategies can you use to cultivate a more hopeful and trusting mindset? The Contagion of Cynicism – 00:13:45 In what ways is cynicism contagious, and how does it spread through groups and organizations? How can you counteract the spread of cynicism within your own social and professional networks? How does organizational cynicism from leaders affect employees and company culture? What are the consequences of micromanagement and lack of trust in a work environment? Strategies to Foster Hope and Trust – 00:18:04 How can you build trust and positivity within your immediate team or social circle? Demographic Trends in Cynicism – 00:24:27 How can you identify your own cynical tendencies? What demographic groups are experiencing the highest rise in cynicism, and why? How do generational differences impact levels of trust and cynicism? What are the implications of increasing cynicism among younger generations for the future of society? What factors contribute to the increasing levels of cynicism in today's society? How have historical trends and recent events, such as the pandemic, influenced collective trust and cynicism? Cultivating Hope and Trust – 00:34:14 How does Dr. Zaki differentiate between hope and optimism? What are practical steps to foster hope and maintain a positive outlook? How can you support friends and family members who are struggling with cynicism? What is the concept of "trusting loudly," and how can it enhance your relationships? How can collecting more social data help you challenge and overcome negative assumptions about others? Final Thoughts and Resources – 00:45:34 Where can listeners learn more about Dr. Jamil Zaki's research and his new book, "Hope for Cynics"? What additional resources are available for those looking to improve their social and emotional health? How can listeners apply the insights from this episode to their own lives and relationships? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we explore the vital importance of social health, strategies to foster meaningful connections, and the transformative power of relationships with Kasley Killam, a renowned expert in social health and connection. Kasley has dedicated over a decade to advancing global well-being through her work with organizations like Google, the US Department of Health and Human Services, and the World Economic Forum. Her insights have been featured in prestigious publications such as The New York Times, Scientific American, and Psychology Today. In this episode, we uncover key takeaways from her book, "The Art and Science of Connection: Why Social Health is the Missing Key to Living Longer, Healthier, and Happier," available now. Join us for an insightful conversation with Kasley Killam, where she explores the essential components of social health and the art of building meaningful connections. How can you enhance your social well-being in a world increasingly driven by technology and individualism? What are the fundamental practices to nurture quality relationships that truly enrich your life? Kasley shares her expert strategies for assessing and improving your social health, drawing from her extensive research and impactful work. Discover the transformative 531 guideline for social connection and the steps to integrate diverse, fulfilling relationships into your daily life. What to Listen For Introduction – 00:00:27 How does Kasley Killam's extensive background in social health and public health shape her approach to building meaningful connections? What inspired Kasley to focus on social health and connection in her career? How does Kasley define the concept of social health and its significance in today's society? How Can You Understand and Improve Your Social Health? – 00:02:15 Why does Kasley believe that social health is as important as physical and mental health? How can you accurately assess your own social health? What are the three core characteristics of being socially healthy? How Does Technology Impact Your Social Health? – 00:10:28 How does technology influence our social health, both positively and negatively? What are the pitfalls of relying too much on technology for social connections? How can you use technology thoughtfully to enhance your social health? What is the 531 Guideline and How Can It Transform Your Life? – 00:19:22 What is the 531 guideline and how can it help improve your social health? How can you implement the 531 guideline in your daily life? What are some practical examples of connecting with five different people each week? How do you bring connection back into your life if you feel isolated? What are the signs that the relationships you are in are not mutually beneficial and holding you back? Why Should You Cultivate Diverse Relationships? – 00:36:18 Why is it important to have a diverse social portfolio? How do connections with people from different backgrounds and cultures benefit your social health? What steps can you take to build and maintain diverse relationships? How Can You Prioritize Connection in a Busy Life? – 00:41:14 What small steps can you take to weave connection into your busy schedule? How can you be present and prioritize quality over quantity in your interactions? Why is it essential to balance alone time and social time, especially for introverts? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices