Podcasts about Hee

In moments of polarization, the wisdom of Tehora Hee — the recognition of inviolable goodness in all people—can be a revolutionary tool. In this episode, R' Jericho talks about seventy faces, checking Biblical assumptions, Tehora he (It is pure), pre-prayer tests, two villains from one of my own spiritual wildernesses, Anne Frank, and a practice for bringing Miriam's living Torah into our own lives.-------------------------------------We are proud to introduce the 3rd podcast in the Judaism Unbound family of podcasts: Survival Guide for a Spiritual Wilderness, hosted by Jericho Vincent. "We are the ancestors of the future." This new podcast offers a spiritual home for listeners seeking to connect Jewish ancestral, feminist wisdom with their own svara: moral intuition. Each episode of this limited series delves into a different story of our ancestor Miriam, illuminating her mystical teachings and offering practical tools for navigating and flourishing in personal or political spiritual wildernesses. We're thrilled to periodically feature episodes of Survival Guide for a Spiritual Wilderness here on Judaism Unbound. But we don't only feature those episodes alone. Lex Rofeberg and Rena Yehuda Newman, two members of Judaism Unbound's team, supplement each episode with some gemara (commentary) as well. We hope that our ideas will help spur you to form your own gemara, and channel your unique teachings -- about this podcast and beyond -- into the world. Subscribe to Survival Guide for a Spiritual Wilderness anywhere that podcasts are found!

We're celebrating the LGBTQ+ Celtic musicians this Pride Month today on the Irish & Celtic Music Podcast #712 . Subscribe now! Malin Lewis, The Homespun Ceilidh Band, Bua, Callanish, Dancing With Hobbits, Ermagerd the Bard, Alexander James Adams, Seumas Gagne, Melanie Gruben, Ockham's Razor GET CELTIC MUSIC NEWS IN YOUR INBOX The Celtic Music Magazine is a quick and easy way to plug yourself into more great Celtic culture. Enjoy seven weekly news items for Celtic music and culture online. Subscribe now and get 34 Celtic MP3s for Free. VOTE IN THE CELTIC TOP 20 FOR 2025 This is our way of finding the best songs and artists each year. You can vote for as many songs and tunes that inspire you in each episode. Your vote helps me create this year's Best Celtic music of 2025 episode. You have just three weeks to vote this year. Vote Now! You can follow our playlist on YouTube to listen to those top voted tracks as they are added every 2 - 3 weeks. THIS WEEK IN CELTIC MUSIC 0:11 - The Homespun Ceilidh Band "De'il In The Kitchen / The Drunken Piper" from Home With The Homespun Ceilidh Band Daphne Eftychia Arthur (pronounciation eff - ti - HEE - ah) T and L 3:19 - WELCOME 5:26 - Bua "John Joe Hartnett's / Spellan the Fiddler" from Down the Green Fields Brian Ó hAirt: vocals, sean - nós dance, concertina 9:29 - Callanish "The Wind that Shakes the Barley" from Callanish John Adams: Fiddler 12:58 - Dancing With Hobbits "Hobbit Hornpipe" from Dancing With Hobbits Sam Gillogly: Fiddle 15:22 - THANKS 17:44 - INTREVIEW: INTRODUCTION 23:43 - Malin Lewis "Hiraeth" from Halocline 27:59 - INTERVIEW: INSPIRATIONS 35:15 - Malin Lewis "Trans" from Halocline 38:20 - INTERVIEW: RAPID FIRE QUESTIONS 45:08 - Malin Lewis "The Old Inn" from Halocline 48:52 - FEEDBACK 52:55 - Ermagerd the Bard “I Walk Among You” from single 55:31 - Alexander James Adams "Your Coming Spring" from The Blue Rose Rare and Other Faerie Tales 1:01:16 - Seumas Gagne "Tir Nan Og" from Baile Ard 1:06:32 - Melanie Gruben "Water Charges Song" from Like a Tide Upon the Land 1:11:30 - CLOSING 1:12:37 - Ockham's Razor "I'm Coming Home Northumberland (2024)” from Garnet Pride Month with Celtic Music #463 1:18:36 - CREDITS The Irish & Celtic Music Podcast was produced by Marc Gunn, The Celtfather and our Patrons on Patreon. The show was edited by Mitchell Petersen with Graphics by Miranda Nelson Designs. Visit our website to follow the show. You'll find links to all of the artists played in this episode. Todd Wiley is the editor of the Celtic Music Magazine. Subscribe to get 34 Celtic MP3s for Free. Plus, you'll get 7 weekly news items about what's happening with Celtic music and culture online. Best of all, you will connect with your Celtic heritage. Please tell one friend about this podcast. Word of mouth is the absolute best way to support any creative endeavor.

Wolves forward Hee-chan Hwang has been speaking to Wolves Express about his challenges with injury during 2024/25, his determination to be fully fit through next season and his ambitions to help South Korea qualify for their 11th consecutive FIFA World Cup. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode originally broadcast on May 8, 2025. The original podcast post is here: https://pixelatedgeek.com/2025/05/binary-system-podcast-456-wtnv-267-missed-connections-and-more-star-trek-lower-decks/s week in Night Vale, Cecil's starting a new segment: Missed Connections. I'm sure you're all familiar with the concept, where you throw all of your longing and regret into the public forum in the hopes that one person (or in the case here, one car, one planet, one train, or one very untrustworthy partner in crime who can't keep running forever, Sebastian) will tune in at just the right time and instinctively know that you're talking about them. There's also a little about gently-expired soup and how Arby's is the most romantic place on Earth, if you happen to be Cecil.Kathryn also has a full recap of Star Trek: Lower Decks Season 3 Episode 8 (Hee, George Takei said "horsey".) We then devoted some time to talk about (yet another) WorldCon scandal, this one involving the committee using AI to vet their panelists. We have some thoughts about this, but if you take one thing away from the discussion it should be this: ChatGPT Is. Not. A. Search. Engine. That is all.This week's outro is a clip from Fountains by Noisy Oyster. The song "I'm So Bored" by Mal Blum has a music video!Update: WorldCon has released an apology (and explanation?) for the use of ChatGPT.Looking for a present for that hard-to-shop-for person? Want to buy them (or yourself) a square foot of a castle in Scotland? Look no further! You can support the restoration of Dunan's castle, legally call yourself Lady or Laird, AND if you use this link to get there, you can support this podcast too! ScottishLaird.co.uk.For updates, fan art, and other randomness, come follow us on Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, and Instagram!

Lekker joh, je verschuilen achter die camera en de wereld aan je voorbij laten trekken! Maar als je verder wil - en stilstand is achteruitgang - dan zul je langzaam maar zeker je comfortzone moeten oprekken. Weet je, uiteindelijk is het ook gewoon een elastiek en gaat de spanning er vanzelf af. Als je maar zorgt dat het niet knapt

"Dark Nuns" adalah film thriller supernatural Korea Selatan yang dirilis pada 24 Januari 2025. Film ini merupakan spin-off dari "The Priests" (2015) dan menandai kembalinya aktris Song Hye-kyo ke layar lebar setelah sepuluh tahun. Disutradarai oleh Kwon Hyeok-jae, film ini juga dibintangi oleh Jeon Yeo-been, Lee Jin-wook, dan Moon Woo-jin. Cerita berpusat pada Suster Junia (Song Hye-kyo), seorang biarawati dengan kemampuan eksorsisme yang gigih berusaha menyelamatkan Hee-joon (Moon Woo-jin), seorang anak laki-laki yang kerasukan roh jahat. Dalam usahanya, ia dibantu oleh Suster Michaela (Jeon Yeo-been), seorang psikiater yang awalnya skeptis namun kemudian tergerak oleh keteguhan hati Junia. Mereka menghadapi berbagai rintangan dan situasi menegangkan dalam upaya menyelamatkan Hee-joon dari cengkeraman roh jahat. Dari sisi pendapatan, "Dark Nuns" meraih kesuksesan komersial. Di Korea Selatan, film ini berhasil mencapai titik impas dengan meraih 1,6 juta penonton, setara dengan biaya produksi sebesar USD 10,7 juta. Di Indonesia, film ini juga mendapatkan sambutan positif, mencapai lebih dari 1 juta penonton sejak penayangannya pada 24 Januari 2025. Secara global, "Dark Nuns" direncanakan tayang di 160 negara, termasuk Mongolia, Filipina, Australia, Selandia Baru, Thailand, dan Laos. Film ini mendapatkan ulasan beragam, dengan beberapa kritikus memuji penampilan para pemeran utamanya dan ketegangan yang dibangun sepanjang cerita. ---Podcast ngedrakor! dipersembahkan Dalam Ruang Produksi Studios, diproduseri bersama oleh Ron & Mal. Episode baru tayang mingguan!Baca berita drama Korea favoritmu di ⁠⁠⁠detikpop.com⁠⁠⁠Follow Instagram kami di⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠@podcastngedrakor⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠#PodcastNgedrakor #ngedrakordidetikcom #ngedrakordispotify

Ercan Kesal ve Yenal Bilgici ile keyifli bir söyleşi...Ercan Kesal demişken Muhtar'ın repliğini de iliştirelim...-Yalnız bir şey söyliyeyim. Et on numara.+Dee mi?-Kuzu değil mi bu?+Kuzu. Biz başka bir şey yemeyiz komserim. Kuzudan başka bir şey bizim evde yenmez. Bazıları bunu yemiyor. Bunun koktuğunu söylüyor.-Hee kokar derler.+Ama et... Kuzu etidir. Yani yenecek et de kuzu etidir.

November transitions come to Saint Michaels. Based on the works by Blacksheep. Listen to the ► Podcast at Steamy Stories. Gordon & Miah Go On Holiday, before the hectic Advent flurry. Manchester Airport was busier than usual today. At Terminal 2, ranks of chairs were filled with passengers desperate to board flights to warmer climates. People from all walks of life headed along the concourse. Black, White, Asian, singles, couples, entire families, a group of American tourists arguing over the most mystical of all British customs -- queuing, cancerously-tanned tourists drifting homeward on the fumes of suntan lotion, pale tourists arriving with the damp smell of a cloudy country clinging to them -and drifting serenely through the crowds, a church organist and his much-younger girlfriend. "Well this is it!" Miah grinned as she and Gordon made their way to the departure gate. "Can't wait to get away from this awful weather!" Gordon replied, fiddling with his boarding pass. It was the middle of November. The rain had been relentless for the past few months, and showed no signs of easing. They boarded the Jet2 737 for the four and a half-hour flight to Tenerife South. They were seated in seats D and E on row 12 in the middle of the aircraft, which happened to be the emergency exit row. To Miah's delight, she'd got the window seat. "Oh nice!" she exclaimed, noting the larger amount of legroom. "Yeah, I was determined that we weren't going to be crammed in like sardines for four hours," Gordon replied, putting his hand luggage in the overhead bin. "Also, not wanting to sound like an anti-social old git, but I'd rather not sit next to anyone else either. Last year I had to fly to Poland, to help restore an old organ in Krakow. The outbound flight was a nightmare. Got wedged next to a fifty-stone bloke for two hours." "Also handy for other things," she winked at him as she fastened her seatbelt. "Our first holiday together. I can't believe it's actually happening. Oh Gordy, this is going to be unforgettable, I just know it." The flight was fully-booked and it seemed to take an eternity for everyone to board. Gordon observed the other passengers with his usual cynical eye. As a frequent flyer, he'd seen it all. This flight was no different. A middle-aged man wearing a Panama hat was taking his time, fiddling with the overhead bin, completely oblivious to the fact he was blocking the aisle. A family of four behind him tutted impatiently. A couple of rows in front, a young blonde woman with false nails and surgically enhanced lips was taking selfies, no doubt for Instagram. Gordon raised an eyebrow as she pouted and tilted her smartphone, almost elbowing an elderly man in the face. Obviously an influencer of some sort, he assumed. And what could be more glamorous than a selfie on a charter flight to Tenerife? Ah, the joys of modern air travel, Gordon thought to himself. And as soon as the seatbelt sign light goes out, folk will be up and heading to the loo. Miah was more interested in looking out of the window. "I want this to be a wonderful time, Miah. I hope it's as fun for you as it will be for me." He kissed her gently. "A week of sun, sea and lots of food. I just hope you won't be bored. I mean, there are excursions we can go on, you don't need to be stuck round the pool all day..." She was quick to reassure him. "Gordy, that's perfection to me. Family holidays with my parents were never relaxing. Dad was an action man, always wanting to do adventure stuff -- paragliding, rock climbing. I never wanted to do anything like that. For one thing, I'm terrified of heights. So I was always dumped in the hotel's Kid's Club whilst they went off enjoying themselves. I never liked those activities. I just wanted to be on the beach. Best holiday I had was when I went to Turkey with Jenna and her parents when I was twelve." "Well our hotel is right on the beach, so you're all sorted!" Gordon smiled back. "A full week away from St. Michael's Church and its organ! Finally my fingers can get a much-needed holiday. Plus, it'll be nice not to have Reverend Morris emailing all the time." "His sermons never get any better do they?" Miah replied. "Jenna did say she was trying to help him there." "Hmm, she needs to try harder." Gordon fastened his seatbelt. The vicar's wife had many talents, but improving her husband's sermons didn't seem to be one of them. He cast his mind back to Easter Sunday service. "Is Jenna still in the Guild Voices choir?" "Yes. She really likes it. Their choirmaster Derek said she has a perfect voice." Gordon chuckled to himself and wondered whether Jenna had worked her special magic on Derek. The fact she'd been using an egg vibrator during the Easter Sunday service seemed proof of that. Reclining in the seat, his mind briefly flashed back to his encounter with Harriet, his old crush. She'd be back in Australia now. He knew he'd never see her again. It was as if a long-abandoned loose end had finally been tied up -- an open door to his youth had closed. Her wise words about his relationship with Miah had emboldened him. Miah was his future now. No matter what happened. It was time to stop looking back. He was shaken from his thoughts as the plane's engines spooled up and Miah grabbed his arm. "Oh take-off. I love this part so much. I'm such a big kid. But it's so exciting!" "Yeah. It is. I love it too." The 737 roared down the runway and rose into the sky, climbing through the dense cloud. Even when they had reached cruising altitude and levelled off, Miah's eyes remained fixated on the view from the window. Bright blue and nothing but a blanket of cloud obscuring the land far below. Seconds after the fasten seatbelts sign went out, some passengers rose from their seats and headed for the toilets, just as Gordon had predicted. An hour into the flight and the queue for the toilets had gone. The cabin was quiet and most people were glued to their phones and tablets. Miah glanced round. Now seemed the perfect time for one of her fantasies to become reality. "Hey," she whispered in Gordon's ear. "Fancy joining the Mile High Club?" He laughed off her suggestion, then realised she was deadly serious. "Wait...you want to?" "I've always wanted to!" He bit his lip. "It's a hell of a risk, Miah. If the cabin crew find out we could get fined. Some airlines ban you for life." "Seems a bit harsh. Two consenting adults wanting some private in-flight entertainment." Her hand squeezed his thigh and she unfastened her seatbelt. "Join me in the rear toilet...if you're brave enough! Knock twice." As she got up from her seat and started forward toward the rear of the plane, she noticed a man rise from a seat farther forward in the cabin and glance back at her. The guy was about fifty, brown hair, bearded and of a stocky build like Gordon. This was no stranger. For an instant, Miah thought that perhaps the man was, in fact, a minor celebrity. He looked away from her after a fraction of a second of eye contact, stepped into the aisle, and moved forward towards the toilet at the front of the plane. He reminded her of someone, but try as she might, she couldn't make the connection. Thinking no more about it, she carried on to the toilet. In his seat, Gordon scratched the back of his head and wondered what to do. The thought of actually joining the infamous club had got him half-erect already. He rubbed his growing crotch bulge and decided to go for it. Now was his chance. It wouldn't be long before the cabin crew started the in-flight food and drinks. In the plane's tiny rear cubicle, Miah had positioned herself against the wall and prayed that Gordon hadn't chickened out. Two knocks on the door made her stomach lurch in excitement. She opened the door. "Gordy! You're here!" She slipped her dress off her shoulders. "What's this? A nervous flyer?" Gordon grinned as he squeezed into the toilet cubicle and quickly closed the door. "Actually this flight is too boring," she teased. "Needs more turbulence." "Well now. I know how to make it better." He pushed her up against the wall, and whispered into her ear with hot, seductive breath. "This is your Organist Captain speaking." Before Miah could comprehend exactly what he said, Gordon was all over her with a love so fierce. His hands roamed her bare shoulders and neck as he smothered her lips, nipping against her earlobes and bare skin. He kissed the sensitive skin below her jaw, making her tilt her head back. He kissed on, licking and grazing it, knowing he had hit a sweet spot. Gordon brought her face down with his hands, kissed her as she moaned lightly into his mouth. This pleased him immensely as he moved his hands down till they rested against her breasts. Miah knew nothing but bliss when he applied his sweet pressures. She began to gasp and pant as he pinched the sensitive rosebuds under her thin cotton dress. She didn't care as she felt him slide her bra straps down her shoulders. He was desperate to ravish her and she wanted him more than anything else in the world. The low hum of the plane's engines seemed to add to his arousal. "You're so big. Mmmm. I can't wait until I feel you inside my mouth." She said as she unzipped his trousers and pulled his dick out of his underpants. Softly, Miah ran her fingers over the heated flesh of his erect manhood. He took a sharp intake of breath at the feeling of her hands on him, and groaned. Tenderly, she encircled his organ with her right hand and gave it a few quick strokes. Gordon groaned from deep within his throat and moaned her name. Her face inched closer and closer to his penis. She could feel the energy pulsing through the veins and realised she alone was responsible for its arousal. She took a certain amount of pride in that fact. Miah's tongue lashed out at the head of Gordon's cock, slowly licking the bulbous head. "Ah..." He groaned. In the cramped confines of the toilet cubicle, his hands found her silky brown hair, as Miah's tongue lolled around his shaft like she was sucking on an orange slice. Slowly, she took more of his manhood into her wet, sucking mouth. Gordon was enjoying himself to no end. The things this woman could do with her tongue! She licked every inch of his cock, running her tongue across every vein, igniting every nerve ending. His breathing had picked up, Miah noticed. She began to increase her ministrations. She created a stimulating suction with her mouth and began to bob her head back and forth using her tongue to stimulate the underside of his cock. "Fuck!" Gordon said in a strained tone. "Do you h-have...oh...do you have any idea what you're doing to me? Ah!" "Umm hmm," she replied. And just to prove her point, she began to suck him off harder. His orgasm was coming now, hard and fast. "I'm going to cum," he grunted. "Not yet, Gordy. Need you inside!" Gordon quickly positioned himself between her legs as he continued to relish his girlfriend's sweet moans and kisses. Pulling her wet knickers aside, slowly, he began to tease her clit, receiving surprised gasps. He watched as he rolled one of her small breasts while thrusting a finger in and out of her glistening cunt. She flinched, and cried out in joy when she felt him thrust in two fingers. "I think you're ready to join the Club," Gordon whispered. "I know I am. Shall we?" "Yes!" And he thrust his large cock into her, and entered into the depths of her feminine waters. He was inside her, thrusting away, grunting, yelling her name. Miah held onto him tight, her legs wrapped around his sides. "Oh Gordy, sweet Gordy..." Her body shuddered, riding wave after wave of heat and unexplainable emotions. Just as he felt her walls tightening and squeezing him, he felt himself release deep inside of her, shooting his cum deep into her tight and quivering pussy... "Oh fucking hell, yes!" Gordon yelled. A furious knocking on the door brought them crashing down to earth. "Oh shit." "Um, just a minute!" Miah yelled, her voice shaky. She pressed the button to flush the toilet and Gordon quickly withdrew. Outside, a small queue had formed. "Whoever's in there must be trying to flush themselves down the bog. They've been in there ages!" a woman muttered to the air steward. Gordon zipped up his trousers and unlocked the door. He took a deep breath. "Okay, brace yourself. Hope whoever knocked isn't too pissed off with us!" He slid the door open and came face to face with a growing line of passengers. "About bloody time!" the man in the Panama hat yelled. Some of us have prostate trouble you know!" He fell silent as Miah squeezed out of the toilet behind Gordon. "Er, guess it's time we returned to our seats," Gordon smiled through gritted teeth. There were a few shocked gasps, while others cheered and clapped. "Looks like you two have earned your wings, the steward said, with a wink. Advent At Saint Michael's: Jenna has a dilemma. Can the Bishop help her? "This year has absolutely flown by," Reverend Morris said as he read through the latest edition of the parish magazine. I can't believe it's almost the first Sunday of Advent!" "It's been quite a year," his wife replied, looking very much troubled. "Are you alright Jen?" Reverend Morris looked at her. "Something's bothering you, I can tell." Jenna let out a sigh. "Oh Simon. I'm just so disgusted with recent events. I can't believe what's happened. He knew at once what she was referring to. "Ah. You mean the Archbishop of Canterbury resigning. No-one was more disgusted than I was. To think, we had to go and dine with him at Bishop George's house last year! Bowing and fawning over him whilst he prattled on about Africa and equal opportunities. That lying, hypocrite of a man had the nerve to threaten me over some 300 year old plaque in my church with the most tenuous link to slavery. And all the time he was covering up for some vile abuser!" He slammed his fist down on the coffee table and it was the first time Jenna had seen her normally mild-mannered husband look so enraged. "Makes me feel sick!" He added. "Good riddance. I hope whoever replaces him will be an actual Christian this time." Not as sick as I feel, Jenna thought to herself. Had I known what the Archbishop was truly like, I would never have given him a blowjob at that dinner party! But at the time it was necessary to stop him going public over the offending plaque in Saint Michael's church. Reverend Morris composed himself and sighed. "In times like this, I always find my faith tested. These people at the top have turned away from God. I just hope our dear little church doesn't suffer." Jenna embraced him. "That won't happen, Simon. I'll make sure of that!" "I'm feeling better already. We're approaching such a busy and important time in the church calendar. And your birthday too!" The shocking scandal engulfing the C of E had at least meant that Bishop George had long forgotten Reverend Morris' little dalliance with Sandra Conway at the vicarage garden party back in August. He took a deep breath and wondered if he was ever going to finish his sermon in time for the Sunday service. Meanwhile, over at 64 Stovepipe Avenue, Gordon the organist had no such worries. He whimpered and squirmed. It was getting hard to form thoughts between the tickling, let alone words, and the corners of his vision were fuzzing with pink mist that blended in with the view of Miah's of jiggling, bouncing breasts smothering him. "Has my sexy organist been a naughty boy?" She teased, tickling his balls. "You always bring out my naughty side...ah! Oh! Not down there! "Hee hee...Now I'm going to..." Suddenly, Gordon's smartphone rang, disturbing their afternoon pleasure. "Oh ignore it," he mumbled, in between kissing his girlfriend. The annoying ringtone continued, before the phone finally went silent. "What were you going to do?" "Open your diapason," Miah giggled, wrapping her hand round his cock. "That's the right term, yes?" "Oh yes," he replied, sucking on her nipples. "You've already made me Swell to Great!" Gordon always loved it when pipe organ-themed words were used during sex. The phone rang again. "Damn and blast it," Gordon exclaimed, reaching over to the bedside table. "Can't have five minute's peace. I should've switched it off." "Better answer it, it must be important," Miah said, licking the tip of his cock. "Hello? Oh hello Reverend." "Hope I haven't caught you at a bad moment, Gordon?" The vicar said. "Are you alright? Your voice sounds a little shaky." "Er, no I'm fine. Just er, doing a bit of D I Y. What can I do for you?" "Well about this Sunday's service. I would've emailed you but my Gmail has been playing up. Can't seem to log in at all. I hope it'll resolve itself soon. Anyways, could you play Happy Birthday on the organ after the service? It's for Gladys Wilcox. She's eighty-eight. I'll make an announcement during the reading of the notices." "Oh..." A groan of pleasure escaped Gordon's lips. "Umm, yes, of course I can!" "Are you sure you're okay? You sound tired." Reverend Morris asked. "I'm fine, Vicar. I'm...trying to...er, er, unblock the toilet. Eighty-eight? Good old Gladys, that's an achievement." Miah struggled to hold back a laugh and continued pleasuring the organist. "Right, thanks so much. I won't detain you further. Hope you get your toilet sorted. See you on Sunday!" The call ended and Gordon switched off the phone. "Unblocking the toilet?" Miah laughed, jacking his cock. "You should've said you were getting your pipes cleaned!" "It's hard to think clearly when a sexy lass has her lips round your dick!" Reverend Morris put down the phone. "Hmm, Gordon has organ practice in ten minutes. He's picked a fine time to unblock his toilet. Unless he's giving the practice a miss this week." "A blocked toilet is serious business though," Jenna replied. "Remember the trouble we had with our downstairs one after the vicarage garden party? Good thing Norman was able to fix it. Took him a while." "I still haven't a clue what it was that got flushed down there. Norman said it was a toy, but Christopher insisted it wasn't one of his, and none of the other kids at the gathering used the downstairs loo...not that it matters. Norman seemed rather embarrassed as I recall." "Maybe it wasn't a toy at all but a massive turd," Jenna added. "I bet poor Norman just said it was a toy because he didn't want to gross us out or embarrass anyone. By the way, did you notice how distracted he's been recently? I think he's got his eye on that newcomer to our church...what did you say her name was?" Reverend Morris took a sip of his coffee. "Oh. Eileen Hattersley. Yes, she's been attending our church for about a month now. She's a widow, and was brought up Catholic...used to attend Saint Mary's when Father Aiden was there. She was very fond of him, but since he jumped ship and joined the Living Earth Free Church, she seemed to undergo a crisis of faith. I think L E F C is a bit too modern for her, and the new priest at Saint Mary's isn't as approachable, so I've heard." "Hmm, I wonder what Gladys will think of Norman eyeing up a younger woman? They've had a sort of master-slave relationship for over a year now!" "Not sure! I still can't get that image of him in that pinny and being whipped out of my mind," the vicar said, shaking his head. "Whatever floats your boat. He's an excellent churchwarden. Anyways, I'd better hurry. I've got to be at the Youth Opportunities meeting at the town hall." Alone in the house, Jenna couldn't help but feel regret. Her musings were interrupted by a knock on the door. "Really hope this isn't another one of those doorstep sellers." She opened the door and was greeted by none other than Bishop George. "Hello Jenna! Is Simon in?" "Oh George! Afraid you've just missed him -- he's gone to some meeting at the town hall." "Ah, what a shame," the older man replied, trying to look disappointed, but secretly he was delighted. "Come in please," Jenna said, grabbing his arm. "Actually I could do with someone to talk to right now. Oh George. I did something last year that I truly regret now and I'm not sure how to deal with it." "Why certainly my dear," Bishop George smiled, following the stunning vicar's wife inside. "You know I am always more than happy to help you in any way I can! It's been a while since we last spoke -- was the vicarage party back in summer wasn't it?" "Yes it was. Too long." "How is your cousin doing? And Gordon? I heard that they drank rather too much home-made punch at that party!" "Umm yes. I think we all did! Poor Gordon, he had the hangover from hell the next day. He actually threw up at choir practice...all over the flower arrangement the Mother's Union ladies had brought...good thing this was before the choir arrived." The bishop smiled as he sat down on the settee. He decided not to mention the fact he'd noticed Jenna, Miah and Gordon asleep and naked in the master bedroom. Perhaps they had all been too drunk to remember what had happened? "Would you like a cuppa? Or something stronger?" Jenna asked. "Brandy would be nice," he said with a wink. "Sure!" A few moments later, he beckoned Jenna to sit next to him. "Now my dear, what's bothering you? It's not like you to seem so tense. Indeed, her attitude had him greatly concerned. He hoped whatever it was wasn't related to their passionate encounters in the past. "Well, it's all this business with the disgraced Archbishop of Canterbury," Jenna began. "Simon and I were both horrified when we heard the news." Bishop George pulled a face as he sipped his brandy. "I never liked him from the start. Ruined the C of E, he has. Of course, he's just one of several bad apples. When he was appointed to that role I said to others, this bloke will be nothing but trouble. And guess what I was proved right. And I was ignored and ostracized for my opinions. I can always smell a wrong 'un Jen. That ridiculous business with the 17th century horse. Can't believe I was forced to go along with that." "That's the thing, George. I had to persuade the Archbishop to drop his plans to shame Simon's church and remove a plaque that would've caused a lot of damage to a fragile wall. And I was successful in...persuading him. But..." Bishop George raised an eyebrow as he gazed at her flawless cleavage and legs. He remembered the dinner party last year and how she'd been sat next to the archbishop. How sweaty and red-faced he looked. "How exactly did you persuade him Jenna? Though I do have an idea..." "Oh George. When I was alone in the room with him, I sucked his cock. At the time it was such fun, seducing a powerful man...and it was for a very good reason of course. He backed down. But that was before I knew what a horrible person he was, covering up for an abuser. Now I feel ashamed and soiled." "My dear Jenna, you have nothing to feel ashamed about. He had a lot of us fooled. Friends in high places who defended him. And you did what you did in order to protect your husband's livelihood. Think no more about it. We must look to the future now and hope that the C of E elects someone who won't turn a blind eye to safeguarding concerns and predators that try to hide behind a mask of righteousness." She nodded. "You're right, George. "Oh I feel so much better now that I've unburdened myself!" She threw her arms around him and held him tight. Her firm tits pressed into his chest, and the bishop felt his cock twitch. They stared at each other, eyes flicking back and forth. Jenna's hand slid slowly down his chest, across his belly, over the belt buckle of his black trousers. She pressed his groin gently. "Something else I can help you with?" He whispered, as she began teasing his pink shirt that was neatly tucked into his trousers. "I need my faith in bishops restored." "Well Jenna, you know what to do there," he replied, kissing her as her eager fingers unzipped his trousers and freed his growing erection from his underwear. She was surprised to see that he was wearing plain white boxer shorts this time. "No pretty knickers today, George?" She said, pulling his trousers and underpants down. "Just fancied a change," he replied. "I'm saving the red lace ones you gave me for Christmas." Moving closer, he shoved his sweaty dick close to her face. She naturally opened up to taste him and he tasted as divine as last time. Sweet and manly. Jenna's hands quickly wrapped around his hips, pulling him closer to her face, shoving his cock deeper into her mouth, until his wiry grey pubes brushed her nose. "That feels bloody amazing." Bishop George sighed. "Swallow it all the way. I know you can do it, Jen." He urged her on as his dick quickly hardened further. The bishop's manhood was thick and a good seven inches when it was hard. Jenna closed her eyes to enjoy the musky smell of his crotch and the wet sounds of her lips sucking him. "Let's go upstairs," she whispered and he didn't hesitate to follow her into the vicarage's master bedroom. Much activity had taken place in here, he mused. He sat on the edge of the bed as Jenna took her dress off and then unhooked her bra, shrugging it off her shoulders, slipped her thumbs into the waistband of her knickers, and lowered them. Bishop George pulled her to him, his tongue flicking over delicate pink nipples, his fingers brushing her back and arse. She ran her fingers through his silver hair, before kneeling before him. Jenna opened her mouth wide and greedily started to suck his cock. She looked up to him, his eyes were closed and head tilted back moaning softly, "Oh, I'm blessed. Keep on doing it." Hearing those words, Jenna started sucking wildly on him. His breathing became really heavy as well as his moaning when suddenly the bishop lifted her head off his cock. The next thing Jenna knew, she was on her back with him between her legs lifting them high in the air. "Fuck me, Right Reverend. Give it to me." She found herself saying breathlessly. And he did just that as he rammed half his dick deep in her pussy so violently that she sucked in air to keep from crying out. Then he rammed the rest of it into her, stopping only when his low hanging balls slapped against her. Age hadn't dimmed his stamina one bit and he could match Gordon, her husband and the other church men she'd slept with. "You like having a bishop's cock in your pussy, Jen?" He suddenly asked with a huge smile on his face. "Has this Bishop successfully restored your faith?" "Yes... oh God yes!" "Well you've certainly strengthened mine and I thank you for this divine joy!" The knowledge that she was giving this hot older man so much pleasure filled Jenna with pride. Bishop George was really enjoying himself at this point as he was pounding her. He buried his cock deep into her holy tunnel and held it there as he pumped a full load of thick cum into the redhead's ever-welcoming womanhood. Burst after burst of his seed coated Jenna's insides and she climaxed, gasping for breath, but beyond satisfied! They lay happily together cuddling each other afterwards. Both had been relieved of their stress and worries. "You really are a true Christian Jenna," Bishop George murmured as he caressed her back. "Always thinking of others." Based on the works by Blacksheep, for Literotica  

She's had the organist. Now she wants the Vicar.A Series in 17 parts, by Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Mia weakly raised her hand and switched off the shower."That was amazing, Gordy-pie. Organists really are good with their hands!""Not so bad yourself," he panted. "Wow. I enjoyed that immensely! You're quite a lass, Mia.""I'd like to see you play the organ," she said, stepping out of the shower and reaching for a towel."I need to get my breath back first!" He laughed, as Mia began playfully drying him off. "God, you're an eager little beaver aren't you?""Hee hee. Yes, but what I meant was, I'd like to see you play the church organ. I've not been inside a church for years. Jenna said that St Michael's is cool.""It's a nice church." I wonder what else she's told her? Gordon thought. "Why not come along to the Sunday service? You can see me in action there, so to speak. After the service, you can have a go on the organ if you'd like. Do you play any musical instruments?""Guitar and violin, but I've not practiced for ages.""Ah, so strings are your thing? That's good. It'd be nice to have a violinist in the choir. One of the choristers plays the trumpet. Which keeps him from singing and I'm glad of it as his voice is bloody awful."Mia sniggered. "You're funny, Gordy-pie. I really like you. Are all organists as fun as you?""Nay lass. I'm one of a kind. He pulled her close and kissed her neck and lips. He was an incredible kisser, and she was curious to know more about him."Are you married?""Long divorced," came his reply. "I'm married to the pipe organ, as they say." He wondered if Jenna had mentioned anything about their various liaisons over the past year, and was about to say something, when the bathroom door suddenly opened."Jen! Ever thought of knocking before entering?" Mia gasped, covering herself with a towel."I can't leave you alone for five minutes can I?" She turned to Gordon, who grinned sheepishly at her."Um, hello!""Funny place to have organ lessons, Gordon," Jenna said, as she watched him squirm."Gordy-pie was just showing me how good an organist is with his hands, weren't you?" Mia said, kissing him. "And you know what, he's amazing!""Oh I'm well aware of how good he is," Jenna replied, folding her arms.Sensing disapproval, Gordon attempted to explain. "It just happened. I didn't know your cousin was here," he prattled. "I put the plant pots in the yard, went into the kitchen and she was just there, wearing nothing but a towel!""You don't need to explain yourself, Gordy-pie. We've not done anything wrong," Mia said. "We're both single. Why are you so uptight, Jenna? Is it because we're in the vicarage? Is that like, a sin or something?"Jenna was in no position to claim the moral high ground. "No, no of course not. I was, just a bit surprised, that's all. It's fine. Just, try to be a bit more discreet, Mia. What if Simon had walked in?""Oh I'm sure the good reverend would approve," Gordon smiled, winking at her.The perceptive Mia noticed his gesture and wondered what he was hinting at."Jenna took a deep breath. "Okay, well I'm going to have a coffee. I'll leave you to get dressed. Do you want a drink, Gordon?""A tea would be lovely. I'm parched. Thanks!""I'll have tea as well, please." Mia added.Jenna left the bathroom."She's acting weird," Mia said. "There's something she's not telling me."Oh boy, wait until you find out, Gordon thought. Your mind will be blown."Maybe she's a bit envious!" Gordon said as he picked up his clothes, and wondered where his underpants had gone."Can I keep these, Gordy-pie?" Mia giggled, holding up his white briefs."Think they're too big for you!""I don't want to wear them. I want to keep them under my pillow and sniff them at night.""In that case, they're all yours! But I want your knickers in return!""Fair's fair!" She tossed him her pale pink cotton undies to him."Thanks!""I loved our shower time," Mia said, kissing him again. "And I loved your big cock. You're a sexy man, Gordy-pie.""Gordy-pie hopes Mia-pie can play with his organ again very soon!" the organist replied as they got dressed and headed downstairs.Jenna brought them both a cup of tea as they sat down in the lounge."Gordon, you're not going to put up with her calling you that cringey nickname are you?" she said, handing him the cup."I like it. It's cute," he said, as Mia rested her head on his shoulder."It's childish. If someone had called you that a year ago, you'd have bitten their head off. You used to have a terrible temper.""Ah well that was before I saw the light," he said, sipping his tea. "When you, showed me the way." He smiled at Jenna as she sat opposite them. "For that, you know I am forever grateful," he added."Did you become a born again Christian like Jenna, Gordy-pie?" Mia asked."I've always been a Christian," Gordon replied. "I just sin a lot, that's all. As we all do, right?" He raised an eyebrow at the vicar's wife. "But we keep praying for forgiveness every week, and luckily for us, God is the forgiving sort, eh?"The front door opened and Reverend Morris came in."Good lord, I need a large brandy!" He gasped, tossing the car keys on the table."What I have seen, can't be unseen, and what I've heard, can't be unheard!""Whatever's the matter Simon?" Jenna said, standing up."You were right, Jen. Gladys Wilcox and the churchwarden. They're, at it!""Told you so," Jenna said. "Actual sex? I'm not being ageist but can Gladys manage that at her age?""No. Regular vanilla sex would've been easier to deal with. Actually, I think gerbilling would be easier to deal with. But seeing Norman, naked in her backyard, wearing a pinny and being struck on his arse with a riding crop,”Jenna cleared her throat, trying to silence him, given that they had company." She treats him like a slave and he enjoys it!" The vicar continued, unaware there was an audience. "And there's more. She knows about the storeroom threesome, and you won't believe this, she proudly told me, that sometime during Lent, she performed oral sex on Gordon.""Ahem. Simon, shush, we've got," Jenna cringed. "Wait, what? She gave Gordon oral?"Mia's jaw dropped."Sucked him off whilst he was sat at the church organ! She'd wanted him to be her slave, but he declined. So she set her sights on Norman instead. Well we both know Gordon prefers a younger woman, right?" He turned round, and noticed Gordon sat on the settee, and Mia sat next to him."Oh, good afternoon Gordon!""I brought those plant pots you wanted," the organist meekly uttered.Later,Jenna and Reverend Morris sat on the settee watching an episode of Father Brown, although neither were really paying attention to it."I can't get that image out of my head. Gladys giving Gordon a blowjob and whipping Norman's bare buttocks. I know we've, engaged in some naughtiness, but I never imagined one of the oldest members of the church was into that sort of thing!""Good for her," Jenna replied. "Kinkiness aside, it's nice for her to have Norman as a lodger. I mean, she lives alone and in this day and age, older people can feel vulnerable. I know Gladys misses her hubby a lot.""Oh Bert. Yes. He was dead long before I came to St Michaels. Bishop George told me more about him. He was the organist before Gordon took over. Apparently he was quite a character.""I'm sure he was. And the current organist seems to be going the same way.""Jen, you seem a bit unhappy about Gordon having intercourse with your cousin today. Is that because you're protective of her or because of, well, I know how close you are to him?"Jenna sighed. "Oh Simon. I'm ashamed of myself. I actually felt jealous when I saw the two of them together. How selfish is that? After everything you did for me last year when it was my birthday, and you gladly accepted my dalliances with the other male members of the church. Can you forgive me? I wish to say a prayer of forgiveness."The vicar took his wife's hands in his. "Of course I can, my love. And I understand how you feel. You see, with Mia here, I think you've got something you've never had to deal with before.""What's that?""A rival!"Mia was eavesdropping from the staircase. A mischievous grin formed on her face as she listened."Holy shit, Jenna's had more men than Elton John's had wigs. She had the nerve to have a go at me for seducing Tom. And she's slept with Gordon too? No wonder she looked so tense. Ha! And sweet, Reverend Simon is okay with that? That's not what it teaches in the Bible, surely?"She slipped back to her bedroom."Let us pray together," Reverend Morris said."Father, I return to You with my sins before me. Nowadays, I lack compassion for my brother and sisters, my eyes are clouded with wrongdoings my heart is against. Opposing Your Words, I sinned and done evil in Your eyes. I drained myself off Your kindness and followed my worldly desires. Father, guide me as You are right in Your verdict and justified in Your judgment. Do not leave me astray as I pray for a blissful life with You and a life free of evil. In Your Mercy, I pray.Amen."-(Luke 15:18, Psalm 51:3-4)"I feel better," Jenna said, opening her eyes. She ran a finger down her husband's cheek. "Simon, let's go to bed. Mia's asleep. The guest bedroom is right at the other end of the landing. She won't hear us. Tonight I need my Vicar's touch,”"What a good idea! All this talk of Gladys Wilcox getting her hands on men's dicks, I'd quite like some hands on mine!"A Girl With FantasiesMia lay back on the bed in the darkness, her mind buzzing with the events of the day. Reaching under the pillow, she pulled out the pair of Gordon's briefs."Enjoyed you, Gordy-pie! You were a total sweetie."She sighed, pressing the crotch of the underwear against her nose and inhaling deeply, whilst fingering herself with her other hand. Gordon's undies bore a pleasant, musky, manly scent, a faint mark which she assumed was pre-cum, and a couple of wiry grey pubic hairs. Perfect. Knowing that the organist's thick cock had been snugly contained within was enough to make her climax again. She wondered if he was wanking off and sniffing her knickers."Hope he likes mine too." She wanted to see the organist again, as sex with him had been amazing, but Mia had her sights set on a bigger prize - and this one wore a clerical collar.InsomniaGordon was in bed, but having difficulty sleeping. His mind was a complete whirl. He reflected how in the past year, he'd gone from being completely sex-starved, to having more sex than he'd ever had during a whole fifteen years of marriage, and during his late teens, when he'd been a horny youth, desperate to sleep with any woman. In the Eighties, those halcyon pre-Internet days, just stumbling across a discarded porn magazine in the bushes was more valuable than gold. He remembered his time at university, when he used to spy on the nurses undressing at a nearby hospital.He chuckled as he remembered losing his virginity to his piano teacher - whilst she was giving him a tour of Blackpool Tower ballroom. He credited her with starting his interest in wanting to play organs,"Look at me now," he said out loud. "I got seduced by a woman young enough to be my daughter. Who is now the vicar's wife. I fucked a Ukrainian woman in the church. I've been fucking the vicar's wife every week in the church. I took part in a threesome with her and the vicar. I and several other men gave her a facial in the church. I got my dick sucked by an eighty-six year old pensioner too. Now I'm fucking the eighteen-year old cousin of the vicar's wife, and exchanging underwear with her."He reached for the pair of pink knickers and gave them a good sniff, stroking his cock at the same time. The crotch had dried, but earlier it had been wet and sticky with Mia's pussy juices. A heavenly scent."The world is a bloody mess right now, but I'd say my life is pretty good," he smiled. "I hope Mia wants to see me again. She's a lovely, horny little thing. I hope she comes to church this Sunday."He wanked himself off happily, before slipping into a blissful slumber. For the first time in a year, he dreamt of a woman other than Jenna.Mia's DelightMia was edging closer to an orgasm as she continued to pleasure herself. Gordon's briefs pressed against her face were having the desired effect, but oh, God, she wished she had a large dildo as well. Her sopping pussy was aching to be filled again.Hearing muffled laughter on the landing, brought her back to her senses. The sound of a bedroom door closing. More laughter.She slid off the bed and wiped her hand on her t-shirt. Tiptoeing to the door, she opened it, and listened. The inky darkness of the landing was disturbed by a light under Jenna's bedroom door.With the stealth of a cat, Mia slunk down the landing. Standing in front of the door, the sounds from within were clearer. The creak of a bedframe. The headboard bumping against the wall. The low moans of the reverend, followed by the higher pitched gasps of Jenna.She bit her lip as she listened to their carnal sounds. Squinting, she peered through the keyhole. The tiny opening barely allowed an interested voyeur to see a thing, but just briefly, she glimpsed Reverend Morris' bare backside rising and falling. Lying between her cousin's legs which, likewise entirely bare, were extended straight upwards into the air."Hosanna! Hosanna! Hosanna, in, the, Highest Heavens!" Reverend Morris yelled, to which Jenna responded by screaming in ecstasy.Mia clamped her hand against her mouth to stifle a laugh. At the same time, her pussy tingled like crazy. That the good vicar quoted Biblical phrases during sex, turned her on in a way she never expected."I am coming soon! Hold on to what you have, so that no one will take your crown!"This quote from the Book of Revelation proved too much, and seconds later, Jenna climaxed, with a scream.Mia tried to remain silent as she too, came. With a wildly beating heart, she shuffled back to her bedroom."I want him. I want Reverend Morris to fuck me like that."Reverend Morris is seduced, but can he satisfy her?Lightning flashed, followed by a crash of thunder so powerful it rattled the kitchen windows. The storm began not with a sprinkle or drizzle but with a sudden downpour, as if clouds were hollow structures that could shatter like eggshells and spill their entire contents at once. So far, July was proving far less flaming than June."Blimey," Reverend Morris said, as the rain made him look up from his laptop. "Not a good start to Mia's first day in her new job, is it?""A bit of summer rain won't bother her," Jenna replied. "Her mind's probably fixated on Gordon.""Heh, give her some credit, Jen. She's shown initiative. I think she'll work hard and be a good cleaner for the church. She did an excellent job tidying up our kitchen.""That's true. She should be about finished in around twenty minutes. Ten hours a week isn't much. I wonder what her long-term plans are? I mean, she can't clean the church hall toilets for the rest of her life can she? And I must phone Aunt Kathleen, I keep putting it off. She'll go berserk when she finds out what's happened."Reverend Morris sipped his coffee. "Have faith in her, Jen. She's chosen this path for herself. And as my dad always says, never put off until tomorrow what can be done today. Right, I have to pop over to the church. I'll check in on Mia and see if she's okay with setting the alarm system. Don't know if she wants some lunch with us or if she has plans of her own?"Jenna picked up the phone. "She didn't say. Okay, I'm going to bite the bullet and phone Aunt Kathleen."In the church hall, Jenna had finished using the floor-polishing machine on the wooden floor. The two hours had flown by. As well as making the floor spotless after this morning's yoga class, she'd cleaned the toilets and emptied the bins. The work was boring, as the vicar had warned her, but an absolute doddle. For £12 an hour, she couldn't complain. It was the easiest cash she'd ever earned. It was far better than stacking shelves in Aldi and having to deal with abusive members of the public. The church toilets hadn't been the horror show she'd braced herself for - even the gents were reasonable. The good chaps of St Michaels had good manners and good aim it would seem!Outside, more thunder boomed. The sound of the rain. The rain. The cold merciless sound of the rain."Ugh," Mia muttered, looking out of the window. "I hate weather like this."It was typical British weather. The storm had washed all the color out of the day. The sky was as charry as burnt-out ruins. Wind-driven rain, grey as iron nails, hammered every surface, and road gutters overflowed with filthy water.Mia returned the machine to the store cupboard and locked it. She checked her phone. Nearly 1 o'clock.The sound of the main door opening made her jump."Oh Reverend Simon!""Hello Mia. Just checking to see how you're getting on. Have you finished?""Yes, I'm done. I was just going to set the alarm thingy." She noticed how wet his black shirt was."Great stuff, you're okay with setting it?""Oh no worries there.""Little tip if you're working in the hall by yourself, be sure to lock the main door. Anyone could walk in. We're lucky we don't get a lot of crime round here, but for your own safety, it's best to lock yourself in. There are lots of places someone could hide. Right, well I'm just heading into the church to sort a few things out ready for the curate's ordination on Sunday. Jenna's prepared some lunch if you're hungry, oh and be warned, she's phoning your mum.""What? Oh no! Why's she doing that?" Mia pouted."Look, don't panic, she's just letting her know that your safe and well and staying with us. You don't want your poor parents to be worrying themselves to death not knowing where you've gone do you?""Well no. But I don't want Mum turning up.""I don't think you need to worry. Your mum lives in Buxton doesn't she? That's a good fifty miles from here. I don't think she'll drive up here today. But at some point you'll have to speak to her."Mia looked down. "I like it here. I don't want to go back to my parents. Of course, I don't want to be a burden to you,”"You're no burden Mia, please don't think that. If you want to talk, why not join me in the church when you've finished locking up?" He left the hall and Mia took that as an open invitation."Oh I'll join you, Vicar, but I want to do more than talk!"A few minutes later, having successfully set the alarm, Mia dashed over to the church, trying to avoid getting soaked by the rain. The ancient oak door's handle turned stubbornly. She wondered why Reverend Morris hadn't bothered to lock himself in either, then she remembered something Jenna had said about the church "always having to be open for those in need."And Mia was in need all right.Reverend Morris was in the vestry, having just changed out of his damp shirt and into a dry one. He'd donned his regular cassock and surplice, as he always did when in the church, even though he was off duty. He inspected the row of church vestments on the clothes rail. Some items were missing. Some members of the choir weren't the tidiest, and often neglected to hang their surplices back up after the services.Mia walked down the aisle of St Michael's church, glancing round. The incessant pounding of rain on the roof seemed magnified here in this old, airy building. Then the organ pipes to the right of the altar caught her eye. The highly-polished silver colored pipes reflected what little light was shining through the stained glass windows."Impressive," she muttered, admiring the many pipes. "But where are its, keyboards? No wait, manuals. He called them manuals." She looked round, and noticed the organ console behind the pulpit."Ah!"Mia walked over to it. She ran her hand down the wooden stool. "So this is where Gordy-pie sits." Giving a little mischievous giggle, she looked round. There was no sign of Reverend Morris anywhere, so she slid herself onto the stool."Look at this thing. It's like, unreal. All these buttons and stuff It's like a flight deck." Her feet touched the organ's pedalboard. "How the hell does he remember all these? She looked closely at some of the stops. They all had weird-sounding names on them. Diapason, Mixture, Gemshorn."I wonder what these knobs do?" She switched on the small lamp above the manuals, in order to get a better look.Curiosity got the better of her and she fiddled with a couple of stops and pressed a few keys on the lower manual. Nothing happened, seeing as the organ was switched off."Hmm, must be like an electronic piano." She idly pressed down several more keys, pretending to play."Witness the great maestro Mia at work," she said out loud, putting on a fake Geordie accent to mimic presenters, Ant and Dec. "Here on Britain's Got Talent, Mia will now play some of her favorite songs for the audience. Starting with Titanium by David Guetta!" She flung her arms around, as though conducting an orchestra, and accidentally hit the red on/off button above the manuals."This is being live-streamed. Be sure to vote!" Mia slammed her fingers down hard on the middle manual. "I am Titanium!"The organ responded at once, with a deep, radiant sound that seemed to rattle the entire foundations of the church. It was so loud, the stool seemed to vibrate."Shit!!" Mia gasped as she got the shock of her life. Fearing she'd damaged the organ, she panicked and froze on the spot.In the vestry, Reverend Morris had finished re-arranging the vestments, when the booming note from the organ shattered his peace and quiet."What the," He almost jumped out of his skin. "Bloody hell, Gordon. You sure pick your moments to come and practice."When nothing but silence followed that ear-splitting note, he headed out of the vestry to investigate.Mia's fingers were trembling. "Fuck, what did I do?""Well, well. What do we have here?" Reverend Morris chuckled as he appeared beside the console."Eep! I didn't mean to, Simon. I was just, I,”"Ha, it's alright, don't panic!" He said."I caught something and it made that noise.""You managed to switch it on, that's all!" He indicated the red button."Oh, so it's not broken then?" Mia said, getting her breath back."No, of course not. It's seen a lot of heavy use. It can cope with a lot!""It looks so complicated. How does Gordon play it?""With ease, because he's had years of practice. Jenna's just learned to play it, and said how hard it was. No use asking me. I haven't a clue. I'm not musically talented it all. In fact I'll tell you something. I can't even read music.""Really?" Mia replied."I'm hopeless," the vicar continued. "Jenna's tried to introduce me to the piano, but I've got poor co-ordination. My fingers go all over the place. My attempts sounded like Les Dawson."Mia blinked. "Who?""Never mind. He's from before your time." He pressed down a couple of the organ's keys and made a feeble attempt at playing a few notes."Gordon says you have to use your whole body when playing a pipe organ." Mia said, giving him a dreamy grin."He's right, you do.""Do you have to use your whole body when preaching to the congregation, Simon?""Ah, well that depends," he said, switching off the organ and the lamp. "I definitely have to keep my mind focused. Especially during the sermon.""I can imagine. I bet you're amazing. I like your church robes.""Oh thanks! It's called a cassock and surplice. Um, why not come to the Sunday service if you're curious? You don't need to take communion if you're not comfortable.""I've been confirmed," Mia replied. "I'm okay with that.""It's the curate's ordination service on Sunday afternoon too. "That will be quite a spectacle. The Bishop will be performing the ceremony. We're expecting lots of people to attend. Afterwards there'll be a buffet in the hall. Nice social occasion. There'll be more people your own age there."Mia shrugged. "I'm not mad keen on people my own age," she said."I see. Well, Gordon will be there, so that's a reason to attend, surely?" Reverend Morris cleared his throat. "You like him a lot, don't you?""Oh yes. He is lovely. He's really sexy! But you know what? You're sexy too. I hope it's not a sin to compliment a vicar in church?"The flustered reverend's cheeks turned pink. "Oh not at all! Very kind of you to say, Mia."Yes, very sexy,” she purred, and without hesitating, stood up and kissed him on the lips."M-Mia, what are you doing?" Reverend Morris spluttered, backing away.She ignored his question and slipped her arms round his shoulders. "I am worshipping you, Reverend Simon. Like I said, I think you're really sexy,”"B-but, but, I am a married man!" He stammered.Mia breathed in the scent of his aftershave. "And? Jenna's a married woman, yet she seems to have slept with half of the men of this church. And you're like, okay with that?""Did Jenna tell you all this?" He gasped. This time, he made no attempt to free himself from her grasp."She didn't need to. I overheard.""You shouldn't eavesdrop, Mia.""Yes I know, but come on. Seriously? What kind of open marriage do you guys have? Is that church rules or something? How can you be cool with that?"Reverend Morris still made no attempt to move. "Well it's not like you think. I love Jenna so much. I just fell for her big time. She had quite effect on the men of this church when she first started attending, not just me. I was trapped in a sexless marriage at the time. I er, thought the first time we had sex, it was a wild one-off."This explanation failed to satisfy Mia. "And Gordon?""The thing with Gordon, well before Jenna came along, he was a very unhappy, angry man. She made him feel happier than he had been in years. And the choir were beyond grateful for his change in personality, let me tell you.""I see. So Jen just has this natural talent for seducing all these lonely men and cheering them up? A gift from God? In that case, what I'm doing isn't a sin then is it?"She kissed the vicar again, longer and harder."Mia, wait!" He protested. "I can't,”"Of course you can, Reverend Simon. "You've been so kind to me, letting me stay at the vicarage and getting me this job. It's time I repaid that kindness.""Yes, but, I thought you liked Gordon!""I do like Gordon. I just like you too. Don't you find me attractive, just like you find Jenna attractive?"He would've been lying if he'd said no, and his erection was already proof."Yes. You're beautiful," Reverend Morris said, running a finger down her cheek. "Such smooth skin,” Instinctively, he bent down and pressed his lips against hers."Heavenly,”Mia unbuttoned her top, and guided his hands to her small and beautiful tits for him to squeeze and play with."Give me a blessing, Reverend," Mia whispered.The vicar took her hand, led her into the vestry and quoted a passage from Numbers."May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord's face shine upon you and be gracious to you, may the Lord turn his face to you and bring you peace.""Amen," Mia said. After a brief silence, something seemed to snap in Reverend Morris, and he cast off his reluctance."Let me get your legs," he whispered, his voice quavering a bit with sexual tension.Stroking from the knee down, to start. Then Mia felt his holy hands open and slide up the back of her thighs, pushing her skirt up."Spread your legs a bit."His thumbs caressed her inner thigh, and came close, oh so close to her pussy. She wasn't wearing any underwear and he bent down to smell her sex. His thumbs tantalizingly close. Now his hands were on her arse. Seductive massage, strokes, and squeezes nearly sent Mia over the edge. She moaned."Oh yes," he breathed. "Praise the Lord,”Mia's hands roamed across his surplice, and her eagerness surprised him. "Hold on a sec," he said, removing the garment, and starting to unbutton his cassock. When it was open, his black trousers were revealed, along with a straining bulge. She squeezed his hard arse cheeks and pulled him against her. His cock throbbed. Mia unfastened his belt and unzipped his trousers. Seconds later, she pulled his boxer shorts down.He groaned when she took his hot cock into her warm hand, cupping his balls with her other. His cock was thick and of decent length, though not, she noted as big as Gordon's or Tom's. Gordon's was the biggest of the lot. Mia couldn't help be a little disappointed, though of course what one did with something was what counted, not the size.I wonder if this is why Jenna goes with all the other church guys, because Reverend Simon just isn't enough to satisfy her? She thought."Mia, I can't hold back, do you want me to bless you properly or not?""Yes Reverend Simon, I want you to purify me! I need you to fuck me!"Mia wrapped her leg around him, opening up for his cock. He rubbed the head of it on her clit. Reverend Morris was out of control now and she let him take her how he wanted. He entered her and pounded her hard on the vestry's small wooden table.Mia rode his cock and enjoyed his thrusts, but, as good as it felt, the vicar wasn't satisfying her in the way Gordon had done.How can this be? She thought, as her cousin's husband continued thrusting fast and hard into her, grunting as he did so.It must be because he's just not old enough for me, she mused. After all, he's only forty! Still, I've achieved what I wanted to do. I wanted to experience sex with a vicar, and a married one at that. And I've finally got my own back on Jenna after all these years,"Oh Mia I'm cumming!" Reverend Morris slammed into her for one last time and shot his load deep inside her."Well,” Reverend Morris said, after he'd got his breath back. "I hope you enjoyed that Mia. I certainly did, I can't believe I did that."Mia was about to say something, but at that moment, the vestry door opened and Jenna appeared.For a few moments there was nothing but stunned silence."Mia, why? Why Simon?""Now we're even, Jen," Mia said with a wink."Even?""Remember all those years ago when we were at primary school and I was in love with that older boy, Darren Grimshaw?""Er, what?""You knew how much I fancied him.""Mia, you were only ten at the time. You had a bit of an innocent crush.""Well at the time it felt like true love. And you had to muscle in and ruin it. He took you out to Burger King instead of asking me. I was so upset at the time. I vowed that one day, I'd get my own back!""Uh, yeah. I do remember you saying that, now I recall. So, this is your idea of getting your own back, is it? Seducing my husband, in his church?""Jen, you can't really complain. You've seduced half the men of this church!"Reverend Morris looked sheepishly at them both. "Look, I didn't say anything, she overheard us talking!"Jenna took a deep breath. "You're right, Mia. Guess I'm nothing but a hypocrite there. But where do we go from here?"Mia turned to Reverend Morris. "I've seen the light. And had a revelation. And the truth is, vicars just don't float my boat after all. No offence, Reverend Simon. You were really great. But, you're too young for me. Give me a gorgeous older organist any day! I've already found my perfect man and his name is Gordon!""Lucky Gordon," Jenna said at last."Jen, I want you to promise me one thing. I'll never lay a finger on your vicar again, if you'll promise not to get it on with Gordon again."Jenna's face suddenly fell. "What?"Reverend Morris nodded. "Fair's fair, Jen. And you don't need any more organ lessons - you can play the organ perfectly fine now."Jenna thought for a moment, remembering all the fun times she'd had with Gordon - they'd engaged in some fantastic sex over the past year, and at Easter, she'd got the impression his feelings were becoming stronger than just mere lust."Okay, I promise.""Make it a proper promise. We're in church, remember?""In the name of God, I promise," Jenna said."That's better.""Right, now that we've got that out of the way, how about we all go and have some lunch?" Reverend Morris said, fastening his trousers and belt. "I've worked up quite an appetite!"Jenna shook her head as she watched Mia head down the church aisle in front of them."Is she seriously going to ask Gordon to be her boyfriend? He's so much older than her.""Just like I am to you," Reverend Morris replied."Yes but it's double the age gap that we have. What if Mia wants kids ten years from now? Gordon will be in his mid-sixties! He doesn't have any kids of his own. Can you see him being a dad?""I think he'd be a great dad. You're assuming Mia will want to be a mum. Lots of women choose not to have children these days.""Guess you're right.""Isn't it great, all the people of our church and nearby churches have met someone? I've got you, Josh has hooked up with Yulia. Father Aiden has Róisín. Norman's moved in with Gladys, now there's an odd couple, but they're happy! My ex-wife Lucy married Debbie. Gordon's got your cousin, before you arrived, all these people were unhappy. I'd say your work is done, my love!"They walked down the aisle, hand in hand.Privately, however, Jenna smirked to herself."My work isn't fully done. At least I still have Bishop George, Gordon's cousin Barry, Mayor Buckingham and a few other chaps!"By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

Saint Michael's hosts a town celebration.A Series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Young Men of the ChoirChoir practice at St. Michael's church was always a lively affair. Yet, for the past year or so, it lacked a full spectrum of harmony, because of the ailing older men who provided base and baritone fullness to many of the arrangements.Recently, it had become a lot harder on Gordon's ears due to a couple of new members. James and Jordan were two eager eighteen-years old, and the twin sons of Debbie the Sunday school teacher. They both hit puberty rather late, having had vocal changes occur at about their 16th birthday. Last month Gordon overheard the two brothers shout cheers for their favorite Premier League team, while getting in their car, after Sunday morning service.The husky, revelry, inspired Gordon to take on the challenge of refining the twins into a huge asset for the church choir. That enthusiasm diminished after their first choir practice."I've got my work cut out, getting that lot into shape ready to sing at the community coronation celebration, next month!" Gordon told Jenna at their weekly 'organ practice.' "They're bloody awful. I know they're Debbie's boys and she's chuffed they're finally getting involved in church life, but I fear they're tone deaf!""Oh dear, that's no good,” Jenna said as she finished playing Crown Him with Many Crowns and then readied herself to play a much more interesting organ.Jenna could feel Gordon rubbing his hardening cock against her arse. It was then that she had an idea."I think I should give those two boys some extra inspiration," she smiled. "Maybe they're not completely tone deaf. With a bit more instruction, their voices might be passable.""Hmm, maybe." Gordon replied, his voice shaking with arousal. "They're coming in tomorrow afternoon for extra instruction and vocal training. I've taught some pretty poor choirboys and choirgirls over the years. Some did vastly improve and go on to have terrific careers in music."Jenna switched off the organ and slid round on the stool. "Do you want me, Gordy?" She asked, darting her tongue between his lips. "Tell me how much, if you do,”"Desperately!" He growled. "My God, you're so fucking hot! Pardon my language, I forgot we're in the church.""You say the loveliest things."Gordon was hornier than usual tonight. He'd recovered from a bad cold and was eager to make up for lost time. Adjusting the open-fronted black robe he always wore in church, he tried furiously to unbuckle his belt and unzip his trousers with one hand while feeling his way to unfasten Jenna's blouse and bra with the other."Oh, organ daddy is eager tonight!" She cooed. "Swell to Great!" she added, referring to one of the organ stops, which in recent months had become a double entendre."I've already swelled," Gordon sighed, as he feasted on her beautiful tits. "Oh Jenna, Daddy needs you so much.""Let me give you a hand, then." She pulled out his thick cock and began stroking it.His shaking hands were soon pulling her soaking wet panties to one side and he wasted no time in sinking his entire cock straight into her hot, wet cunt. When he was completely inside her, he started to slowly pump it in and out, making the strokes longer and faster, banging her back and arse against the organ's manuals, until she was literally screaming with pleasure. Her cries echoed through the empty church."Oh my darling Jenna! Yes!" Gordon groaned. "You're such a good girl! I love fucking your nice, ripe, young cunt! You're going to make me cum hard! I'm going to fill your young body with so much cum! Ah!"Gordon's thick, hot load spurted fast, deep and hard into her."Ahh, that was lovely," she whispered in his ear. "You always pull out all the stops!" Jenna gasped as they recovered from their intense orgasms. Once again, the organist had left her thoroughly entertained. She rested her head on his shoulder and he gently slipped his arms around her."Do you remember the first time we, did it?" Gordon replied, planting soft kisses on her forehead. "Such a long time ago, when you seduced me right here on this organ stool and I hopelessly surrendered to your charms?""Hee hee. How could I forget that? You were powerless to resist. And so shy at first,”"Me? Shy?" Gordon spluttered. "I think not, I was just stunned.""You blushed when you came back from the gents and saw me sat here on the stool!""Organists don't blush! We just, swell." Gordon replied, though his cheeks were already turning several shades of red."Of course," Jenna replied, running her fingers through his thick, silver hair.“And let me fill in for you, tomorrow. I want those fellas to get a vision for how they can add to the choir.”The next day, Jenna was in church alone, practicing a few pieces of music on the organ. Sensing the presence of someone, she stopped and peered over the top of the partition."Oh good. They're here.""Good afternoon you two!" She announced, as James and Jordan headed down the aisle. The two blonde-haired lads looked surprised to see the vicar's wife."Oh, Mrs. Morris," Jordan exclaimed. "Is Gordon here? He asked us to meet him here for some extra choir practice.""Afraid Gordon's needing me to fill in. Hope you're not too disappointed."They both looked at each other. "As if! Gordon's a bit,”"Strict?" Jenna replied. "Yes he is, but he's been organist and choirmaster for a long time and he takes his job very seriously. This coronation concert is really important for the church. The Mayor will be attending. So it's important that we get those voices of yours up to scratch. I think a little bit of extra inspiration is needed."“Some parishioners heard the two of you chanting support for your favorite Premier League football team, a few weeks ago. Is that true?”“Manchester, all the way!” James beamed.“Ah, great team!” Jenna affirmed. “So, do me a favor, please. Can you two repeat that chant you shouted in the car park?”The guys repeated their team Busby Boys chant;Hello, helloWe are the Busby BoysHello, helloWe are the Busby BoysAnd if you are a City fan surrender or you'll dieWe all follow UnitedJenna looked puzzled. “Fellas, I'm having a hard time believing that's what they parishioners were treated to in the car park? Gordon said he heard a very masculine machismo boistering. He heard passion, bravery, smack-talking cockiness. Let's try again, but I'm going to join you, okay? And if either of you hear my voice overpowering your powerful masculine cheers, it is to your shame.”Jordan began the Busby Boys chant again, and the twin baritones filled the high ceilings of the great sanctuary with the richest a-capella Jenna had ever heard since joining the church a year ago.James and Jordan were breathing heavily, and feeling great affirmation of what they have the vocal power to do, in that place of worship.“Bravo!” Jenna cheered, clapping her hands. This is the raw masculinity that our church needs in worship. Gordon can teach you technique and tone, but Manchester United is where you found your masculine identity. Can you bring that with you to practices and performances?”“Uh, sure;” Jordan said. James nodded.Jenna slid herself off the organ stool in such a way as to ensure a flash of her panties. She had put on one of her favorite short black dresses, which was hardly suitable attire for church. She'd borrowed Gordon's black robe. It was unzipped in front, but too big for her and kept slipping off her shoulders."This thing's not my size at all," she muttered. "Best left for Gordon." She removed it, and sensed the two lads eyeing her up as she draped it over a pew. She was wearing a sleeveless black dress that clung in all the right places.Jordan gave a cough. "Um, Mrs. Morris,”"Jenna, please. No need to be so formal. You're not at school now, are you? In fact I shouldn't be calling you choirboys at all, seeing as you've just turned eighteen. I think choirmen would be more suitable, yes?""Yeah!" They both gave nervous grins.“Well I'm a woman,” Jenna explained. “I can tell you, the good women of the church really want the men to be men. Good men, virtuous, but men. Please promise me you'll continue to be the men God created you to be? And you're a perfectly matched pair of baritones. You have no idea how incredible your resonance can be, if you refine your craft.”"Okay, we'll just have an hour going over the pieces that Gordon mentioned. Nothing too intense. How does that sound?""Great, yeah." James said with new enthusiasm."James, is it true that you want to be an organist some day?""That's right. I start uni in September."“Let's get the sheet music Gordon assigned for this week,” Jenna turned away and fiddled with some music books on the shelf at the side of the organ, bending at the waist and swaying a bit more than she needed to."She is well fit!" Jordan whispered to his brother."Wish she'd take over from Gordon permanently! Yeah. I'd do her." James boasted.Jenna smirked to herself, then stood back up and faced James; "My my, aren't you eager?"James froze. Shit, she overheard! "To sing? Oh sure, we wanna get this right." He awkwardly scratched the side of his head.She walked a couple steps over to him, and carelessly dropped one of the music books on the floor. She squatted down in front of him. Gazing up, she could see the outline of a massive cock hardening behind the skinny jeans he was wearing."Oh, not just to sing!" Jenna said, and slowly slid her hands up his thigh. James just stood there, stunned, not knowing what to do or say. Her fingers were soon tracing the outline of his big, thick, long cock through his jeans."Oh my, James!" Jenna said, "You are a big fella."Jordan gawped as the vicar's wife continued caressing his brother's thigh."So; who wants to go first?" Jenna looked to James, then over to Jordan."Umm," they both mumbled."James," Jenna said, massaging his cock through his jeans, "I think someone wants to come out and say hi, don't you?""Uh, yes!" He gasped, blushing.Jenna unfastened his jeans, and pulled them and his boxers down to his knees. She was pleasantly surprised. Definitely a cock worthy of an organist, or future organist! “You truly are an organist!”She aimed his aching erection straight for her open mouth, and didn't stop until she had thrust his whole shaft straight down her warm, wet throat."Whoa, holy shit!" James groaned as Jenna worked her amazing talented, tongue, swirling round and round his youthful cock. A few seconds of her incredible cock-skills was all he could take and he was soon pumping a whole load of hot cum straight down her lovely throat."Fuckin' 'ell!"Jenna greedily swallowed every drop, her unblinking eyes gazing up at him the whole time. She even kept on gently sucking long after she'd already sucked him completely dry."Delicious! What a good man you are, James. I'd say you hit all the right notes there and are perfectly tuned-up! Now how about your brother, pipe?"Jordan didn't hesitate, and soon had his jeans unzipped. Jenna wrapped her fingers around his aching cock. Like his brother, he was generously endowed, and quick to rise to the occasion, however his lack of experience would mean a swift conclusion. Nothing wrong with that, of course. They were young and eager. In time, they could be molded into excellent lovers. Jenna thought about the time she seduced the nervous, virgin curate in the church hall's storeroom. Thanks to her, Josh was now full of confidence and an expert in the bedroom, and he had recently got engaged.Her hand was pumping Jordan's nice, young cock good and hard."Oh God, fuck yes!"She leaned in and licked the head of his cock a few times, before running her tongue up and down the length of it. Her lips kissed and sucked the tip of his cock as her tongue teased it a few times. It twitched uncontrollably. Jenna slid it into her mouth while looking intently into his eyes. Jordan pressed his hips forward and was surprised to see her eagerly take the entire length of his member into her mouth. She grabbed his ass cheeks and pulled him tight. She sucked his shaft hard, making him yell with pleasure. She savored the taste of pre-cum."Oh Jenna! I'm gonna cum!"The vicar's wife began to suck him harder, her tongue sliding over and around his cock as her head as was pushed and pulled back and forth. She sucked Jordan's cock for all it was worth, caressing his balls at the same time.Oh dear God, then it came, what she was waiting for. Jordan's cock erupted in a white creamy fountain; he couldn't stop. He was groaning in ecstasy. Jenna swallowed every drop, gulping it down."Umm, tastes so good! Another yummy load. You really needed to unload, didn't you?Jordan's eyes were now closed and he was breathing heavily.Well, that gets you fully tuned-up, too. I guess we're about done here," Jenna said, standing up and planting a kiss on both their cheeks. "But, we'd better do a bit of singing as well. "I'll give you a few minutes to, compose yourselves, then meet me at the piano. Then we'll sing Onward Christian Soldiers! If you boys can sing as expertly as you shoot your cum, the coronation service will be a massive success!"Polishing the Mayor's Ceremonial MaceIt was Thursday morning and the coronation of King Charles III was by now, tantalizingly close. Over at St Michael's vicarage however, all was not well."What do you mean we can't have a street party outside the church this Sunday?" Reverend Morris exclaimed. "There was no problem last year when we had the Jubilee celebrations."The council official at the end of the line muttered something about it being the Mayor's rule, and hung up."Bloody councils," the vicar moaned. "Full of useless overpaid pen-pushers. The Mayor's coming to visit our church later today too. I've a good mind to raise the issue with him face to face."Jenna raised an eyebrow. "I thought being a mayor was just a ceremonial role. How come he's not letting the church hold a street party?""Some red tape about obstructing the King's Highway or something.""But we're holding a party to honor the new King! Surely rules can be waived just this once?""We could always pretend to be eco protesters," Reverend Morris remarked.Jenna uncrossed her legs and began thinking. "That Mayor needs some persuading. "I can't have Simon's plans ruined by pesky red tape,”Mayor Harrison Buckingham rolled his eyes as he turned into the small car park of St Michael's church hall."Right, time for another tedious hour shaking hands with old ladies and giving fake smiles," the corpulent man muttered as he parked the Jaguar."Keys," his wife replied."What, you're not coming in with me?""Not a chance. You can do this all by yourself, darling. I'm off to the Trafford Centre for a spot of retail therapy.""But, but, Pauline, you're the Mayoress! And how am I going to get home?""And you're the Mayor dear. A small church like this only needs one of us. Our house is five minutes from this church. You could either phone a taxi or do something really daring, such as walk home. Keys."He grumbled to himself but did as she asked."Ah, he's here," Reverend Morris said. Jenna observed the approaching man carefully. Aged about sixty, overweight, and with greying hair that was dominated by a large and very obvious toupee. His gold mayoral chains glinted in the late spring sunshine."Oh, he's a chonky lad." Jenna chuckled."From what I've heard, he's dishonest and drinks a lot." Reverend Morris whispered. "His smile is as fake as that hairpiece he's wearing. Norman Winstanley knows him from the Men's Fellowship meetings, and said he's made a fool of himself several times.""Perfect qualities for someone working on the council then," Jenna smirked."By the way, I heard Norman has moved in with Gladys Wilcox and become her lodger.""There's something kinky going on between those two, I'm certain of it." Jenna said."What? As if. She's in her eighties!" The vicar gasped."Just because there's snow on the roof, doesn't mean the fire's gone out!" Jenna replied. "Although Gladys once confessed to me that she had a bit of a fancy for Gordon. I guess Norman's her second choice as he was willing to do whatever she asked of him."Reverend Morris' eyes widened. "I'm sure he only helps her with D I Y projects and her shopping.""Well I still think there's more to it. Mark my words. I don't think Gladys is the prim old widow you think she is!"Reverend Morris fiddled with his surplice. "Ah, good afternoon Mayor!""Hello there, Vicar!" He shook hands. "Oh and who is this lovely lady? Your daughter I presume?""No, my wife, Jenna.""Ah, my bad. Dearie me, either you're his second wife or you've got a bloody good plastic surgeon! Ha ha ha!"Reverend Morris cringed. "Jenna is my second wife. Lucy and I divorced a year ago."Oh I see. Well don't blame you there, Reverend. Wish I could do the same but She Who Must Be Obeyed won't let me. Ha ha ha!""Where is the Mayoress?" Jenna interrupted."Afraid she's, tested positive for Covid," the Mayor lied, hoping that they hadn't noticed his wife driving away."Oh what a shame," Jenna replied. "So you're all alone? Never mind, I will be glad to show you round our beautiful church.""Can't stand the bloke," Reverend Morris whispered to his wife as they entered the church. "There's tactless and then there's downright offensive. The man's a complete buffoon.""Leave him to me," Jenna said. "I don't mind showing him round.""I'm not leaving you alone with that creep!" Reverend Morris exclaimed."Oh Simon, I can easily handle a chubby chap in gold chains. He wouldn't dare do anything in a church, surely?" She was desperate to get the Mayor alone."In this day and age, can't let your guard down,” He was interrupted by Norman."Sorry to interrupt, Vicar. The builders have arrived to repair the church hall roof. But there's another problem.""Can't this wait, Norman? We're just showing the Mayor round.""Afraid not." He lowered his voice and whispered. "They've discovered asbestos.""What? Oh no! That'll cost a fortune to remove. And I've spent weeks promoting that church roof fundraiser. I'm not running any more quarter marathons!""Yeah. Not good for the church finances, but the hall can't be used until it's all been removed by a specialist company. It can't be done until after the Coronation weekend. I've been speaking to the Treasurer and he wants you to give the green light to get someone in to get it sorted. Could you just pop round and sign some paperwork?""Sure, no problem." He turned to Jenna. Before he could say anything, she stopped him."I'll take care of you-know-who," she smiled, and gave both of them a wink.""Looks like it's just you and me, Mr. Mayor," Jenna said, taking hold of the Mayor's arm. "Do excuse my husband, but I'm afraid he's just found out there's asbestos in the church roof, so that means we can't hold our Coronation party in there." Jenna gave a loud and deliberate sigh as the two walked into the empty church vestry. "And what with the ban on having a street party, I don't know what we're going to do. Maybe you could pull a few strings and allow us to block the road, just this once?"The obese official adjusted his shirt collar. "Mrs. Morris, I appreciate how upsetting that must be for your church, but,”"I'd be ever so grateful, and I'd make it worth your while in ways you could never imagine,”Now he was intrigued. "Oh? Bribery is it? Well I'm anyone's for a bottle of single malt. Or a good box of cigars,”"Oh I'm sure I could run to that, Mr. Mayor. In fact I could give you even more than that if you'd just let me show you.""Oh, you've whetted my appetite already. What could be better than whiskey and cigars?" He was no stranger to taking backhanders."Something like this?" Jenna said, reaching down and squeezing his thigh.The Mayor jolted in surprise. He grinned and gave her a flash of yellow teeth."Are all vicar's wives as welcoming as you?""I truly couldn't say. But I do have a thing for men in suits who wear ceremonial chains," Jenna continued, still massaging his thigh. He was smiling and winking at her and she noticed a bulge growing in the front of his light grey trousers. Her eager eyes kept involuntarily fixing on it."I can show you my ceremonial mace if you'd like," the Mayor whispered, his plump face red with lust. Thank God Pauline chose to go shopping! He thought."Umm, I would love to get my hands on that," Jenna said. "Let's go over to the organ. It's got a nice big stool for you to sit on."He just nodded excitedly. Upon arriving at the organ, the Mayor and put his hands on Jenna's arse and lifted her up. She wrapped her arms around his sweaty neck and wrapped her legs (as best she could) around his fat waist. He pressed his mouth against hers and plunged his tongue in. His breath was scented with whiskey and cigar smoke, and as his actions proved, it had been a long time since he last got laid. Not so much a kiss as being slobbered by a dog, she thought. Jenna broke the kiss and beckoned him to sit on the stool."Ah, want to see my ceremonial mace, you hungry girl?""Definitely, Mr. Mayor!" Jenna said, wiping a gallon of saliva off her face.He unzipped his trousers, revealing white briefs similar to the ones Gordon wore, however that was where the similarity ended. While Gordon's were nice and clean and fresh, the Mayor's underpants bore several piss stains and were definitely overdue for a change, as a ripe smell wafted forth.Dear God, Jenna thought. Who would believe it. The Mayor of our town having such dirty undies! She was a bit disgusted, but still curious to see more.The Mayor pulled out his cock, and before Jenna knew it, she was face to face with his "ceremonial mace." It was small, but fully erect. He was smiling down at her with his discolored teeth."There, what do you think, eh?""Oh it's a lovely one," Jenna replied. My God, compared with my husband or Gordon, he's tiny! Still, good things come in small packages, as they say."Don't be shy dear," the Mayor added, desperate for more.His dick was sweaty and smelly. Wrinkling her nose, Jenna slipped her hand round it and began jacking it, wondering why it smelled so bad."Ah, yes. That's the way, sweetheart. I might have to start attending this church, ah! Open your sweet little mouth, my darling."Jenna slid the foreskin back and noticed a lot of smegma. "Mr. Mayor, someone's a bit of a dirty boy.""That's alright, dear. You can clean it off for me."She turned away but he gripped her head firmly and pulled it back towards his cock. Unable to resist, Jenna's mouth suddenly opened and he slid closer, holding her head steady until he had thrust his whole shaft inside.It didn't take Jenna long to get used to the smell, and as she worked her magic on his modestly-sized cock, she found she quite liked the taste of mayoral cheese, and licked it all up. He moaned in ecstasy.A minute later and the dirty, corrupt fat bastard shot his thick, tangy load of spunk down Jenna's throat."Ah. Praise be to the Lord," the Mayor groaned, when she finally withdrew."There, the mace has been polished," Jenna smiled, zipping him up. "And now, Mr. Mayor, about the street party. I would really appreciate if you could ensure it's able to go ahead. Also, if you could donate a few thousand pounds to aid in the asbestos removal at the church hall,”The Mayor stood up. "A few thousand quid? Now steady on lass, I'm usually good for a bob or two, but there's a cost of living crisis,”"Umm, I understand times are hard, but you see, refusal isn't really an option. This church has concealed security cameras, so it would be a dreadful shame if footage of your ceremonial mace and dirty underpants were to somehow end up on the Internet,”Forgive me Lord for telling a lie whilst in church, she said to herself.The overfed official looked mortified. His lip quivered. Utterly defeated, he shrunk back down on the stool, as timid as a lamb. "Umm, whatever you require, I, I'll make sure you get it."Jenna smiled and kissed his cheek. "Thank you so much Mr. Mayor. You're a true ass, asset to this town. And I really did enjoy polishing your ceremonial mace."At that moment, the church door opened and Reverend Morris came marching down the aisle."Sorry for taking so long," he prattled. "What a nightmare, now that this asbestos has been discovered."Jenna calmly appeared from behind the organ."Hello my love. I've been keeping the Mayor busy by teaching him to play a few notes on the organ. He found it really interesting!"The man in question suddenly appeared. "Asbestos you say, Vicar? Don't worry about that. I'll see that it gets sorted out pronto. We had the same problem in the town hall. Nasty stuff is asbestos. As a Christian, it's my duty to ensure that the good folk of this lovely church have a safe building. So don't worry about the cost, I'll glad pay for any repairs and removal."Reverend Morris looked totally stunned. "Oh, my good heavens, thank you so much, sir!""Oh and do please go ahead and hold your street party, in the street! I'll ensure the numpties at the council don't cause any bother. Well, I really must get going, so much to do, so little time. I'll stop by on Sunday and join the celebrations! Nice to meet you both! Thanks for, showing me round Mrs. .er, Jenna! Good day!" He shook both their hands and hurried out."What an extraordinary kind gesture!" The vicar smiled. "All our problems are solved, just like that. I was wrong about the Mayor. It seems he is a genuine man after all.""Just goes to show, you can't judge someone on hearsay," Jenna replied. "Oh look, his wig fell off!" She picked up the toupee off the floor. "Never mind, he looks better without it, don't you think?"As a fellow balding man, I agree!" Reverend Morris said, slipping his arm round his wife and strolling down the aisle. "However, we must discreetly return it to him."The Coronation celebrations at St. Michael's church were a massive success, and everyone had a fantastic day as the entire town came together. The notoriously unreliable British weather behaved itself for once, and provided warm, sunny conditions. The concert choir sounded fantastic. The addition of two rich baritones brought balance and fullness to the sound. The final arrangement was ‘God Save The King'. When the song ended, Gordon flowed into an improv rhythm. He nodded to the twins and they belched out a boisterous chant of God Save the King. Jenna stood up at her piano and raised her fist while passionately joining the twin's chant. The entire assembly soon joined and for about 30 seconds, it felt loke the rafters were shaking. Then a boisterous applause followed. The vicar then dismissed the concert ."I do love the pomp and splendor," Gordon said as he wolfed down a plateful of sausage rolls."Not to mention the food," Jenna said, pinching his arse when no-one was looking."Have to keep my strength up with you around, the organist replied. And the twins were amazing! I've never seen teenagers improve so rapidly. How did you inspire the fellas?”Jenna beamed; “A lady never tells,” she winked. “I absolutely loved that chant at the end of the program, Gordon. Thanks for adding it. The young people were the loudest.”Are we, you know, having organ practice this Thursday?""Of course we are," she replied, with a wink. Noticing the Mayor arriving, she gave a little smile."I'm glad he stopped wearing that wig!” Jenna whispered to Gordon. She also wondered if he washed his undies?England now has her king, the community has a thriving church, and Jenna continued to play her charming role as the first lady of Saint Michael's.To be continued.By Blacksheep for Literotica.

Vicar's wife, Jenna, decides to give up sex for Lent!A series in 17 parts, by Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. The Jenna series started with ‘Jenna Goes To Church', followed shortly after with ‘Jenna, the Vicar's Wife'. It resumed recently with Jenna's New Year'; and now it continues with a Lentil 2-part story. Other episodes will follow.It was the last Sunday of Shrovetide, known as Quinquagesima. At St. Michael's Church, Reverend Morris had amassed a pile of old palm crosses, intending to burn them on Ash Wednesday."Shouldn't be long before the first members of the faithful arrive," he said to his wife Jenna, who was adjusting the flowers at the side of the pulpit."Oh before I forget, I've got something for you to burn on Ash Wednesday," she smiled, handing him a pair of her panties."This is an unusual-looking palm cross!" He replied. "I think I'd better burn this separately from the others! Is there some reason why you want your undies reduced to ash?""Well Simon, I've been thinking. And I've finally decided what I'm going to give up for Lent.""You're giving up wearing underwear?""Ha-ha. Tempting, but no. I'm giving up sex."Reverend Morris almost dropped the box full of crosses. "What? Sex? No, you can't be serious!"Jenna nodded. "I'm 100% serious, my love. Lent is supposed to be hard, and you're always going on about how part of being a good Christian is making sacrifices and so on. It's traditionally a time of fasting and abstaining from something to repent and focus our hearts and minds on the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.""Yes, but within reason, Jen! I don't expect you to suffer hardship as bad as that!""I can do it, Simon. I'm committed to seeing it through. It's only forty days.""B-but, that's six weeks!" the vicar whined, looking as if his entire world was about to end. "I, I'm not sure I can, er, go without for so long!""Now Simon, you're a man of God. You're stronger than most. I know you can do this. And just think how wonderful it will be when Easter comes, everything in calf, bursting out in spring glory, sap rising, mating seasons beginning, shoots thrusting upwards, days getting longer, ""Vicars dying of horniness, " Reverend Morris sighed."Exactly. And it won't just be you going without. The other chaps of this church will have to go without as well!""Oh my goodness, Jenna. There's going to be a lot of frustration building up in this church! When you say no sex, does that mean, ""No physical contact whatsoever, my dearest! No blowjobs, no kissing, no cock in cunt, nada! Just like social distancing."Reverend Morris' lip was trembling. "Not even a kiss?""Nope. I'll be sleeping in the spare bedroom until Easter. I can blow you a kiss. And whilst we can't do anything involving physical contact, there are other naughty ways we can get through Lent.""Like what?""Use your imagination, Simon!"He thought for a moment. "So I'll have to make do with dating Rosie Palms until Easter?""If it helps you cope, yes!"The reverend took a deep breath. "You're absolutely right, Jenna. I can get through this. I admire you so much for deciding to have a sex ban. In fact, I think I love you even more, and I didn't think that possible!""Aww. Ditto." She kissed him. "We'll make the most of Shrove Tuesday," she added, with a wink. "I'm going to do some creative things with pancakes."He slipped his arms around her. "Remember that morning after the Candlemas service, when we got soaking wet in the rain and we just ravished each other once we got back to the vicarage?""Hee hee, yes. Or that time last month during that short holiday in Lincolnshire when we stayed in that weird hotel, and the ghost gatecrashed our passion?""Bit early in the morning for that, isn't it? Then again, I'm not complaining!" A voice shouted, and they both looked round. Gordon the organist had just arrived.Moments later, Josh the curate appeared."Morning guys!" Jenna smiled. She turned back to her husband. "You'd better get your robes on. Looks like some of the congregation are here already. I'll go and hand out some hymn books."He nodded and headed off to the vestry. "Forty days," he sighed. "God, .I will really need your help through this difficult time!"And just how were some of the other male members of St. Michael's Church going to cope for forty days without any 'spiritual guidance' from the vicar's wife?Shrove Tuesday (the eve of Lent)On Shrove Tuesday, Jenna spent all afternoon mixing pancake batter. It would've been quicker to buy some ready-made pancakes from Tesco, but where was the fun in that? She looked at the kitchen wall clock."Come on Simon, you're late. How long does a meeting with the Bishop take?"Her husband had been out all day. At last, she heard his car pull up on the drive."Good. Now the fun begins."The front door opened and Reverend Morris came rushing in. "Sorry I've been so long. Bishop George kept prattling on for ages and then coming back home there's been a road accident so I had to take the long way home, oh I see you've been busy!" He noticed his wife was completely naked except for an apron."Welcome home," she smirked. "It's time to flip some pancakes. Is my randy reverend able to provide some batter?"He licked his lips. "What sort of batter would you be requiring?""Hmm, let's see. That special 'anointing oil' you used during my 21st birthday?" She whirled a frying pan in her hand and flipped a pancake. "Here's one I prepared earlier."His hands found her shoulders, and turned her to face him. His hands moved up to cup her face and Jenna felt his lips close around hers in a tender kiss. She returned it with rising passion, slipping her tongue into his mouth. As their tongues danced, Jenna quickly unfastened her apron, letting it slide down over her smooth skin to the kitchen floor.She could hear Reverend Morris unfastening his own garments, and when he embraced her tightly, she felt his bare skin press against hers with delicious warmth. Her husband's mouth left her lips, trailing down her neck to her chest. He took a nipple in his mouth and teased the erect tip. It was perhaps the upcoming sex ban enhancing his senses, but Jenna's breasts had never felt so full, and had never tasted so sweet. His hands roamed down over her arse, savoring her curves.Reverend Morris moved back up her body, his lips playing over her breasts, then back up her neck. Jenna's hands slid down his chest and at last reached their goal. She gripped his throbbing member, took a few steps backward, pulling gently but firmly, and he promptly followed her. She felt the edge of the kitchen countertop meet her lower back, and she swiftly heaved herself on to the cool granite surface and lay back, spreading her legs.Reverend Morris had a sudden urge to taste his wife; his tongue met with her soft skin just above her clit, then down into her folds, tasting, discovering and exploring all that she had to offer. He began to suck and lick her clit. How he loved to worship at this altar.Jenna reached for the bowl of pancake batter. A wooden spoon was sticking out of the bowl. Without hesitation, she began spooning the batter down her breasts."It tastes alright," she murmured, placing a blob of batter on her husband's nose. "But it needs an extra ingredient, ""Umm, I think I can help you there.""Fuck me religiously, darling." Jenna said hoarsely.A pair of strong, silky legs wrapped around the vicar's arse. He lowered himself onto her and felt those glorious batter-coated breasts rub against his chest as he began thrusting into her. He tried to set a steady, leisurely pace to begin, but the legs around him urged him on faster and harder. Reverend Morris responded with enthusiasm, and within moments he was pounding into his wife with all his strength, mindful that after tonight he wouldn't be able to do this for six weeks."Yes, yes, oh my God yes, I've never felt anything like it!" Jenna moaned."Bloody hell, I'm coming, oh Jenna!" Reverend Morris yelled as his stream of hot cum filled up her cunt and flowed back out onto the kitchen countertop.Jenna lay back on the countertop, eyes closed. It was several minutes before her breathing had calmed enough for her to speak."Did I provide enough batter?" Reverend Morris asked."Your holy offering was more than generous!""Forty days without from this moment on. You've still time to change your mind.""I'm sticking to it, Simon. We'll get through Lent. We'll have to think up some creative contactless ways to get our rocks off."The smell of burning interrupted them. They both glanced at the stove. To Jenna's dismay, the pancake she'd been cooking had been virtually cremated in the frying pan."Oh dear," she said, gazing at the remains of the pancake, which now resembled a lump of coal."Now that's what I call a perfect burnt offering for Ash Wednesday!" Reverend Morris replied.The Organist is Entertained.Gordon Leesmith always looked forward to Thursday evening arriving. This was when he had organ practice at church, and for the past few months he'd been teaching Jenna to play the organ. These lessons were really just an excuse for a passionate romp with the stunning vicar's wife, who was always more than willing to get her hands on the organ in his trousers, rather than the church one.Gordon hummed to himself as he brewed himself a cup of tea. He checked the time. It was only just after midday. Six hours to go. He was impatient and horny, but in a very happy mood. He'd just returned from seeing his Primary Care physician. That in itself something of a miracle in modern Britain; and received good news. His benign prostate enlargement wasn't as bad as he'd feared. Despite being a bit overweight, the doctor had given him a clean bill of health. His blood pressure was low, and so was his cholesterol.Today was his birthday. He was fifty six. A year ago, Gordon had been a miserable, short-tempered man who didn't endear himself to anyone else in the church. Long-divorced, impotent and frustrated with being alone for so long, his life had turned upside down when a young woman by the name of Jenna Fox had started attending St. Michael's Church. A few months later, she'd turned her attentions to flirting with him. Never in a million years did Gordon think he'd end up getting his cock sucked by a stunning redhead whilst he sat on the organ stool.As Gordon sipped his tea, his phone vibrated."Oh, an email from Jenna," he smiled, checking the message.Happy Birthday Gordon! About tonight. I'm afraid I can't make tonight's organ practice. I won't be able to until Easter arrives. Thing is, I've chosen to give up sex for Lent. I know you won't to hear this and it's going to be so hard for me to stick to this, but you've got to test yourself and set a challenge, right? It's what being a Christian is all about. I truly hope you'll understand. But - that doesn't mean we can't still have some fun! Make sure you visit the church - I've left a birthday present for you on the organ stool, trust me, it'll see you through this hard time. And when Easter comes, Jesus won't be the only person that rises, wink wink. It'll be worth the wait, keep your organ pipe warm for me.Love Jenna. xxx"She's abstaining from sex?" Gordon almost dropped his cup of tea. "Wait, what? Oh no! This is a nightmare! I won't be able to have a fuck for six weeks? Bloody hell! I'll go round the bend, I can't even call on Yulia's mate Martika anymore. Damn it, why did she have to bugger off back to Ukraine?"He wasn't sure whether to scream or burst into tears, but after he overcame the initial shock, he took a deep breath and composed himself."Well if she's gone on strike that means the vicar, the churchwarden, the curate and the bishop won't be getting any cunt either. Ha! Misery loves company, as the old saying goes. Gordon suddenly felt much better, knowing he wasn't the only one being denied the pleasure. Still, six weeks, God, this was going to be a struggle."Hmm, oh well. I've endured worse. I once had to endure that ‘Brotherhood of Man' tribute act in Skegness. I wonder what Jenna's got me for my birthday?"He picked up his car keys. There was only one way to find out.When Gordon arrived at the church, he discovered that the door was unlocked. Usually he had the place to himself, and he was thankful for that, given the sort of "organ practice" he liked to engage in with Jenna. Cautiously, he entered the church. The sound of a vacuum cleaner could be heard. Mrs. Wilcox, one of the many "old church biddies" as Gordon secretly called them, was busy cleaning up the aisle. Noticing the organist approaching, the slightly-built pensioner switched off the vacuum."Ah, hello Gordon! Are you here to tickle the ivories? I'm just finishing off here and then I'll be out of your way." It wasn't at all fair to describe Gladys as an ‘old biddy'. She kept herself fit and classy, and besides the rotation of sanctuary cleaning which she took part, she also headed up an outreach to single mothers in the community."Hello Gladys. No need to stop on my account. I usually come here in the evening, but, er, change of plans. You know, you really should lock yourself in when you're here by yourself. You know what it's like these days. Quite a few crackheads and drunks hang around the churchyard, some can be intimidating."The old woman rolled her eyes. "Oh they don't concern me, dearie. I carry a small can of mace in my apron pocket. My grandson Dwaine bought it for me online. He'll be arriving soon to give me a lift home."Gordon raised an eyebrow. "Blimey. There's more to you than meets the eye. Is that stuff even legal?""Maybe not, but you won't rat on an oldie, will you?" She looked back over her shoulder at him, then winked.Gordon laughed. "My lips are sealed, Gladys."Gordon's Lentil Gift From JennaHe hurried to the organ. "Crafty old gal," he said to himself. On the stool was a red gift bag. "Ah, this must be Jenna's little present for me," he said sitting down on the stool and opening the bag. A large red envelope and something wrapped in pink tissue paper were inside. He opened the envelope, and pulled out a birthday card. Inside, Jenna had written a little rhyme.Organists are sexyNone more than youOpen your presentIt'll help you get through!Xxxx"Ha-ha," Gordon chuckled. "Well whatever is this present?" He began tearing off the tissue paper. "What's this? A torch?" He held up the plastic object, then removed the cap on the end. "Bloody hell. She's bought me one of those fleshlight sex toys!" He peered closely at the silicone vagina. "Nice cunt lips, even if they are artificial, oh wait, there's a piece of paper stuffed inside." He pulled out the note.Hello Gordon. I had this specially made for you. Now you can still put your organ pipe inside me all through Lent! P S - don't forget to use the lube!"Wow, she had a cast of her own cunt made just for me! What a great birthday present! Last year all I got was a pair of slippers from my cousin." He noticed the small bottle of clear lube in the bottom of the gift bag, but didn't pay much attention to it, being too distracted by the sex toy. His erection was straining painfully against his underpants and trousers. Despite Mrs. Wilcox still busily vacuuming the pew cushions, Gordon unzipped and pulled out his cock. He peered over the top of the organ. The old girl had her back to him and besides, you had to walk round to the side of the organ to see anything. He was safely concealed behind the instrument. She wouldn't notice him having a quick wank,"Never used a sex toy before," he muttered to himself, sticking a finger into the fleshlight. "First time for everything though. It feels really tight, let's give it a go." He attempted to slide his cock inside."God, this is really tight, oof!" He managed to slide his cock halfway in, but instantly regretted it."Bit too tight, ouch!" He tried to pull out, but his cock was fully stuck inside the toy.The realization hit him. "Shit. I should've used the lube."Gordon bit his lip, as he tried to ease the thing off this manhood, but to no avail."Oh no."Gladys the paramedicMrs. Wilcox switched off the vacuum cleaner and glanced round. She could just see the top of Gordon's head. The organ was completely silent."Is he playing with the volume turned down?" She wondered.Gordon was starting to panic. If he didn't get this toy off soon, things could become embarrassing. He didn't want to have to drive up to an emergency medical center to get it removed."Come off, damn you, come off!" He grunted."Having problems, dearie?" Mrs. Wilcox said, appearing at the side of the organ. "Oh my!"Gordon looked mortified. "Um, hello Gladys," he mumbled. "I've got a bit of a problem.""I can see that, you silly boy. What on earth have you been doing? I trust that's not an outsized organ stop?"The organist blushed crimson. "Er, no. It's not. It's a, look, it's got stuck. I can't get it off my, thing.""Let's have a look." Before he could protest, she grabbed the fleshlight and pulled on it."Oww!" Gordon yelled. "Don't yank it like that, Gladys! I don't want to end up like John Wayne Bobbitt!""Needs some lubricant or something. That should help. When I was a child, I got my father's chamber pot stuck on my head. Mother used lard to get it off.""There's a bottle of lube in that bag," Gordon winced, as his cock started to hurt.Mrs. Wilcox wasted no time, and squirted a generous amount of the clear gel on her hands, before smearing some round the base of Gordon's cock. He gave an awkward cough as her gnarled old fingers probed around his privates. He'd never be able to look this eighty-something woman in the eye again during a church service. Going to A & E would be more embarrassing, he kept telling himself. Then again, perhaps not!"Alright, let's try easing if off. Nice and slow." Mrs. Wilcox gripped the base of his cock, and with her left hand began to gently pull the fleshlight. It began to slide off. "That's it! It's coming off now! Gently does it!""Almost," Gordon said, gritting his teeth.She continued to pull and finally, the toy slid off, with a popping sound."There we are! Pop goes the weasel!" Mrs. Wilcox smiled. She handed him the offending toy."Thanks so much," Gordon gasped, relieved that his cock hadn't come to any serious harm."What a big, thick willy you've got!" Mrs. Wilcox replied. "No wonder that thing got stuck!""Er, thanks," Gordon mumbled, feeling more embarrassed than ever."No need to be shy, dearie. A man who is blessed like you shouldn't hide his light under a bushel, no! It's so much bigger than my late husband's was. Dear old Bert, he used to love it when I played with his willy. Of course that was over twenty years ago. I wish I could give yours a proper sucking, but I'd have to remove my dentures, and I've used the Poligrip, "The mention of dentures being removed was almost sufficient to make Gordon lose his erection. He was about to say something, but she continued."On the other hand, an opportunity like this doesn't come my way very often! You don't mind letting an old lady have a little bit of fun before she ends up down the cemetery or in a nursing home do you, Gordon? I'm eighty-six. My mouth is pretty much all that works these days, so that will have to do. Think of it as my reward for rescuing your phallic treasure." She dragged over a nearby kneeling bench, knelt, and motioned for Gordon to step to offer her some ‘communion'.He hadn't the heart to say no. "Um, you go ahead, Gladys." Gordon closed his eyes as she removed her false teeth. He hadn't planned on getting a gum-job from a granny. He presented His cock on the padded velvet counter of her communion kneeler. She gasped in marvel at the glorious treat laying near her covered breasts. Then took his shaft slowly in one hand, and cupped his balls with her other hand. Her eye's sparkled as she beheld the phallus. And then her mouth engulfed his cock.Grasping the base of the shaft, Mrs. Wilcox took the organist's throbbing cock in her mouth and started to move her head back and forth, taking it deeper and deeper."Oh," Gordon sighed. He leaned back, gripping the sides of the organ stool and enjoyed the wonderful sensations as she sucked his manhood. She was good, no, she was very good! This was better than he ever could've imagined. The white-haired pensioner's head continued bobbing up and down on Gordon's cock, tasting some of the pre-cum."Oh yes!" He gasped. God, it felt so good!She withdrew and licked the tip of his cock, swirling around the purple head, as her fingers softly stroked the shaft. Her old skills began to come back to her. Her head and lips moved in an erotic performance. Her tongue provided a private performance that only his cock would ever experience. And the sultry ora she exuded was masterful. This woman was a sex god that only her husband ever worshipped. And now, Gordon was added to that exclusive clan of devotees."Gladys, I'm going to come," Gordon panted. "Uh!""Then fire away, dearie! I'd love a taste!" She felt him tense and then he climaxed. With that, he filled her mouth with streams of his thick, sticky cum as it spurted to the back of her throat. Mrs. Wilcox slurped and swallowed it all. Then she pressed her nose hard against his pelvice, and his thick meat pressed her larynx.As his final spurts tapered off, she very slowly pulled her head back, until his cock flopped down on the velvet padding where Gladys' grandchildren receieved their first holy Eucarist. "Umm, tastes just as good as I remember! There we go, Gordon. I'm sure you feel better now that you've emptied your plums!" She patted his cock, before lovingly tucking it back into his briefs and trousers and zipping him up. "You know something, a fine young man like you could easily pull a lady. Why, I bet there's loads of ladies who'd jump at the chance to get their hands on you! You're such a talented organist too, and you've been divorced a long time. Oh, If I were thirty years younger."Young? She thinks I'm young? I suppose to an octogenarian, fifty-six is young."Oh, I don't want to get married again," Gordon replied, wiping his brow. "I'd prefer something, casual." He cleared his throat. "Thanks for, helping me Gladys!""Well we're all good Christians here, yes? We should help each other!" Gladys looked at where she was kneeling. “Did you know, Gordon; The Greek word for communion is ‘koinonia'. It's also the Greek word for ‘intercourse'? I'll always cherish this special treat you've shared with me.”The door of the church opened and a hulking, six-foot young man came strolling in. He was covered in tattoos and obviously a regular visitor to the gym, as his massive upper arms and shoulders proved. The man looked like he could break necks merely by flicking his finger."Gran, are you here?"Gordon froze in horror as he peered over the top of the organ. "Who the hell's that?" The man resembled Lewis Hamilton bulked up on steroids."Oh that'll be Dwaine, my grandson," Mrs. Wilcox replied. "Be with you in a minute, sweetie!" She called out. "I've just been helping Gordon to polish his organ!"A Sermon That's More Stimulating Than Usual.Reverend Morris was struggling to write his sermon. It was only the second week of Lent, but he was finding this one harder than he ever imagined. The sex ban that his wife had imposed was starting to bite. Jenna seemed to be coping much better than him, and he felt ashamed at his weakness."Help me to be strong, Lord!"Suddenly, his phone beeped. A message from Jenna.Hello Simon. It's lunch break here at work. I figured you're still home alone and maybe feeling a bit, stressed? Why not look up Write-Erotica for some inspiration?She added a winking emoji"Write-Erotica? What's that?" the vicar wondered. He eagerly opened the laptop's browser. "A site for writers of erotic fiction? Hmm. I've never heard of this before. I'm always years behind everyone else, when it comes to things. Okay, let's have a browse. I wonder if there are any naughty fictions about clergy on here?"Reverend Morris soon discovered that the tags for "priest" "vicar" and "church sex" brought up a massive number of results. He was spoilt for choice and clicked on several stories. Some were much-better written than others."Jessica and Father Andrew broke the kiss, a trail of saliva still connecting their lips together. Their mouths were still so close to each other. Jessica let out a small breath as the priest grabbed her tight little ass. "You can go inside, if you want," she told him, then she pressed her lips on his mouth again and soon enough Father Andrew's tongue was in her mouth now, not that she minded at all. They had to be very quiet because they were in the confessional booth,"Reverend Morris read out loud."But the church was empty, so why did they need to be quiet? Eh, I'm just nit picking. This is a pretty hot story!" Feeling himself getting hard, Reverend Morris unzipped his trousers and slipped a hand inside, pulling out his cock. As he continued to read, he started jacking his cock slowly.Jessica unzipped the priest's pants, ‘oh yes,' he said. He began to moan and groan as he continued pleasuring himself.Her sweet, heavenly lips worshipped his holy shaft in ways he never imagined,It felt so wonderful jerking his throbbing cock whilst reading this erotic fic. Reverend Morris began to move his hips around and his legs straightened out under the desk. Soon he laid his head back and stretched his body further. Next thing he know, he let out a rather loud, "Oh, yes, yes that's it!" and started to cum.His milky fluid spurted out and all over his laptop keyboard."Ah,"Write-Erotica had done its work and provided Reverend Morris with some much-needed relief, as well as inspiration."I still don't know what to write about for my sermon, but I'd love to have a go at writing an erotic story just for Jenna," he smiled, getting some wet wipes and cleaning up his keyboard. "I've never tried writing erotica before, but first time for everything! Maybe we could write a chain story or something, and get it finished just before Easter? That could be fun!"Excited by this new idea, the vicar opened a new Word document and began typing away."I'll just write a few paragraphs of smut and then I must finish my sermon!" At the Sunday Eucharist,Reverend Morris was joined by another vicar, who was standing in for Josh the curate, who was attending a conference in Birmingham, as part of his ongoing religious training."A very warm welcome to everyone this morning," Reverend Morris began, addressing the congregation. "As we continue our journey through Lent, I'd like to introduce Reverend Jones from St. Wilfrid's church in Manchester. It's a great honor for her to be here today - she'll be reading the sermon I've been laboring over all week,""Poor woman," someone in the congregation muttered, leading to some muffled sniggers.While the vicar was talking, Gordon was idly peering over the top of the organ. He noticed Jenna sat in the front pew and winked at her. Moments later, Mrs. Wilcox, who was sat next to her, winked back at him and gave him a little wave. Gordon gave an awkward smile and shrunk back behind the organ,"Without further ado, I shall now hand over to Reverend Jones," Reverend Morris said.The vicar of St. Wilfrid's was a dumpy, bespectacled woman, aged about fifty, with grey hair in a bowl cut."Looks like the identical twin of that MP woman," an old man muttered. "What's her name? Therese, something. She's the secretary of state.""No idea," another old man replied. "Oh wait a minute! I know who you mean. Norman Lamont! I thought those eyebrows looked familiar,""No you daft git, he's a bloke!""That vicar looks like a lass to me. Mind you, one can't tell these days,"Reverend Jones stepped up to the pulpit and placed some papers on the book stand."I haven't had a sneak-peek at this sermon," she began. "So it will be a wonderful surprise for me as well as you. I'm sure Reverend Morris has gone the extra mile, as he usually does, and written something that'll make us all think."Reverend Morris gave a proud smile as he looked up at her.Gordon gave a subtle yawn. He always dreaded this part of the service. Reverend Morris had the ability to cure insomnia with his sermons, despite Jenna's best efforts to inject a bit more fun into them,"They say the Devil makes work for idle hands," Reverend Jones said, as she began reading the sermon. "That's a phrase we're all familiar with. This morning, I woke up, and my hands were rotting in idleness. My mind had been drifting to places, sinful places all week. I wouldn't say I'm a regular user of PornHub but," she paused.A look of horror appeared on Reverend Morris' face. "That isn't my sermon," he said to himself. "Oh no,"In the pews, there were a couple of awkward coughs and raised eyebrows. At the organ, Gordon suddenly perked up. This had to be the first time ever that the word PornHub was mentioned in a sermon!"The site just wasn't doing it for me," Reverend Jones continued, "so I decided to go for a walk in the park. I can't tell you how my spirits were instantly lifted. Light was filtering through the trees. It was golden and bright. How blessed we are that God has made all this for us, I thought, and then something in the bushes caught my eye. There was no-one else around. It was then that I saw her, naked as Eve in the Garden of Eden, about to take a dip in the lake. Her sweetly, up-tilted bare breasts reflected the glorious morning aura and her rose-pink nipples were as full and hard as ripe apples,"Reverend Jones paused. "What an excellent use of adjectives. I'm sure we can just imagine this scene in our heads can't we?"Never had the congregation of St, Michael's been so engrossed by a sermon before!"Not half," someone said out loud.Poor Reverend Morris' face had flooded several shades of red. He stood up and hurried to the pulpit."Angela, that's not the sermon I wrote!" He mumbled, begging her to stop."I've started, so I'll finish," she replied. "Everyone seems to be enjoying this.""Her name was Giselle, and she loved to unburden herself and swim in the lake. Freed from her clothes, I watched her in the nude and was convinced I was seeing the embodiment of an angel. She knew I watching, and she knew I liked to watch. I knew she liked me to watch, but this morning, we decided to do more than watch.""How romantic," Mrs. Wilcox said, turning to Jenna. "Your husband has a fine turn of phrase. It's better than his usual sermons, dearie. You should encourage him to write more like this. This church will soon be packed to the rafters if he keeps this up!""Oh, thanks very much!" Jenna replied innocently. She gazed at poor Reverend Morris, who was squirming with embarrassment at the side of the pulpit. He'd mixed up his sermon with some erotic fic, did he write the fic himself or find it online? She was curious to find out."What could be more divine than seeing a beautiful woman naked in a park?" Reverend Jones continued, reading out the story without a care in the world. "Personally, I think Tom Hiddleston naked in a park would be more divine, but that's just my opinion, ""I shouldn't say such things as I'm in a church, but I wouldn't mind seeing the organist naked," Mrs. Wilcox whispered to Jenna, who did a double take. This was one of those rare occasions when even she was left speechless for a few moments!"Really Gladys! You dark horse. Didn't know you had the hots for Gordon!""Just because there's snow on the roof, doesn't mean the fire's gone out!" the old lady replied."Oh this next paragraph has been all scribbled out," Reverend Jones said. She flipped the page over."My pearly-white ejaculate looked perfect dripping off her pink-nosed puppies. I got some on my hand and remember being surprised that it was so hot. I pulled my cassock off and wiped the cum off my hand with it. I walked home that night with a huge smile on my face and love bites on my little reverend."Reverend Morris snatched the papers off the book stand. "Er, my sincere apologies everyone, I made a terrible mistake!""Such a shame, it was building up to a nice conclusion," Reverend Jones said."No, that wasn't my sermon at all. I, I have no idea how that piece of writing ended up mixed up with my church papers!""Dat some good shit right there, Vicar!" Tony the reformed drug addict said, standing up and clapping.The flustered vicar attempted to move on. "Hymn, let's all stand for the hymn! Lo, He Comes With Clouds Descending!""You know something Simon," Reverend Jones said as she headed down the pulpit steps, "you need to get yourself signed up to an adult fiction site. You have talent. I'm on A o 3 myself - under a pseudonym of course. I like writing slash fanfiction about British politicians, I can send you a link if you're interested in reading them?""Er, no thanks, Angela. I'm sure they're very good, but I prefer to avoid anything relating to politics!"To be continued in part 2.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

If sex is a weapon then love is a double homicide.By kittybeaver, in 5 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at Explicit Novels. "Start with the bookshelves." She pointed to the wall next to the fireplace. "Remember, we're looking for a bullet hole or an opening a gun could've been fired through."Tina turned her attention to the wall in front of her, moving her scanner methodically over the wood paneling and around the ornately framed oil paintings. It was her educated guess that the murderer had been in the neighboring office and drilled a hole in the wall."These are some fancy books," Dirk said. Tina looked over her shoulder and saw his head tilted sideways as he read the spines. "They're all hardcovers and absolutely no Harry Potter.""Don't worry about the books." She took one of the paintings off the wall and scanned behind it. "We're looking for something abnormal, something that's just slightly off.""There's something off with the bookshelves," Fact-Tel announced."I knew it," Dirk said. "Who doesn't, at the very least, have Sorcerer's Stone?"Tina placed the painting back on its hook and crossed to the other side of the room. "What did you find, Fact-Tel?""Should I have said Philosopher's Stone?" Dirk asked. "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, that's the metric title, right?""They're not real books," the A.I. said, ignoring Dirk. "It's a false bookcase. The scans are picking up a hollow space behind them.""That is so cool," Dirk said. "What do you think's back there? Pirate's treasure? Porno magazines?"Tina ran her hand around the edge of the bookcase, searching for hinges or a hidden lever. "City Hall is over a hundred years old. It's rumored there are secret passages all through the building, from the base of the Matthias Middle statue on top of the clock tower to the top of that clock statue containing Matthias Middle's bones in the sub-basement. This could be how the killer gained access to the office." She stretched her arm up as far as she could, but even in her high heel boots she couldn't reach the top shelf. "Dirk, feel along the top with your hand. See if you can find a button or something that will open the bookcase."She watched him carefully as he reached his arm up, noting how his T-shirt rode up to reveal his flat stomach and that wispy line of hair that ran from his belly button down into his snug fitting jeans. It was a surprise to feel her tongue peeking out of her mouth and running along her upper lip, as if it too wanted to catch a glimpse of Dirk Allen's happy trail. It seemed every part of her body was proud of his physique.Tina quickly turned, averting the gaze of both her eyes and tongue. "Fact-Tel, how large is the space behind the bookcase?" 'Proud' wasn't the right word for what she felt and she knew it. She needed to stop lying to herself. Her physical attraction to Dirk was a problem, but not nearly as big a problem as her emotional attraction to him. "Could a person conceal themselves there?""Definitely," the computer responded. "If I can analyze the dust and air particles in the space I might be able to tell if someone's been in there recently.""I found something!" Dirk was so excited he nearly shouted. Both his arms were stretched way above his head, his fingers curling over the top edge of the bookcase."Is it a button?" Tina asked, remembering to keep her voice low. "Press it.""Ok." Dirk's hand pressed down, then he took a quick step back.A rumbling noise emerged from the shelves and they started to slide sideways. A dark space appeared, approximately three feet, or rather, Tina reminded herself, .0914 meters wide."Good job." She looked up into Dirk's pale green eyes and gave him another smile. He had such pretty eyes. They contrasted nicely with his dark hair and full, masculine lips. The better Tina got to know Dirk the more attractive he grew. And he was fucking gorgeous when she first met him. It was disturbing, to say the least. Increased physical attraction toward an individual was one of the first signs of,Tina swallowed. She didn't even want to think the words.Increased physical attraction toward an individual was one of the first signs of falling in love.According to SWSO rule #96, secret agents were only allowed to experience three types of love: love of country, love of duty and love of sacrifice. Any other love could be used as a weapon against an agent. It had taken Tina years of therapy to reduce her familial love to an ambivalent indifference. Now, if some deranged villain made her choose between saving the world or saving her parents, she'd make the right choice without regret. Goodbye Mr. and Mrs. Blondell. You died for a good cause.Romantic love was the most dangerous and that was the direction Tina's feelings for Dirk might be heading. The intense romantic bond had to be avoided at all costs. It caused people to lie, steal, or, even worse, wear matching outfits to company picnics. She'd seen it happen too many times before and she had vowed never to let it happen to her.Love, in its essence, was a release of oxytocin in the brain. Every time she engaged in sexual intercourse with Dirk, every time he gave her another mind blowing orgasm, her brain released more oxytocin, conditioning her to feel love and affection for her coworker. As much as she wanted to invite him into her bed and ride him like a wild mustang, she couldn't do it. More sex meant more oxytocin. They couldn't have sex ever again, even if the job required it.Pushing those thoughts from her mind, she pulled her SWSO issued flashlight from her purse and peered into the void. Her beam of light fell on a small, but comfortable looking recliner, a stack of magazines, a box of tissues and a pump bottle of lotion.Dirk reached down and snatched a magazine from the top of the pile. "What do you know, it is porn. The murderer must have planned to wait a long time." He held the magazine sideways so that the centerfold flipped down. "Nice."Tina moved quickly and picked up the next magazine from the pile. While a woman graced the cover Dirk was holding, a man stared back from the one in Tina's hands. There was no mistaking his pretty, green eyes, dark hair and plump, manly lips. Dirk had worked as a model for years before joining the SWSO. It was possible he could have done a risqué photo shoot.It only took a second to open the magazine and look inside. Yep, it was him. She recognized that cock."Get a load of this, Fact-Tel." Dirk was holding his scanner over the magazine. "Tell me that's not DNA.""General Zero." Tina barely breathed the words. Could it be? Might they finally have some evidence that would help them track down their nemesis?"Nope," Fact-Tel said. "That's Appleton's spew.""What?" It almost felt like Tina's heart was breaking."Chesterfield Appleton," the A.I. continued, "Middleburg City Comptroller. The person whose office you're standing in. He's the one who ejaculated onto Miss February's mammary glands.""That makes no sense." Dirk dropped the magazine back onto the pile, while Tina surreptitiously rolled hers up and slipped it into her purse. "Why would Appleton hide for hours just to shoot himself?""I find no evidence of a firearm," Fact-Tel said. "No bullet casings or gunpowder residue.""The murderer was never behind the bookcase." Tina sighed. She knew it when she first saw the magazines, but she didn't want to believe it. Linking Zero to the murders was her top priority. The sooner she did it, the sooner she could put the criminal mastermind behind bars.Her feet felt heavy as she crossed the room to the fireplace, careful to step over the cadaver outlines. She ran her fingers over the intricate wood carvings in the mantelpiece. The winged cherubs holding satchels of money, seemed to mock her with their smiling faces."We're back where we started.""We know some things," Dirk said, his voice a little too perky. It was obvious he was trying to cheer her up. "We know Appleton was a horn dog with a rub cubby at work. We know he was doing the nasty with Snide.""Ugh, biologicals and your need to touch genitals," Fact-Tel muttered. "It's so gross.""It's too bad good old, smut aficionado Chesterfield didn't make his own pornos," Dirk said. "If he'd recorded schtupping Snide, then maybe he'd have recorded the murderer too."Tina looked up at the mirror over the fireplace. The whole room was visible behind her. There was Appletons's massive, wooden desk, the bay windows that looked out over City Hall Plaza, and over by the bookcase stood Dirk looking good in his tight pants and T-shirt. From this vantage point she could see everything."Maybe he did film it." Pointing her scanner at a section of the mirror, she turned it on and counted to 100. "Fact-Tel, what's on the other side of the mirror? Is there a camera or something?""I hate to tell you this," the A.I. responded, "but it's just a wall.""No!" In her frustration, Tina threw the scanner down onto the plush, red carpet, letting her purse drop to the floor with it. "Why does this case have to be so frustrating?" She closed her eyes and rubbed the bridge of her nose with her fingers. "Why can't it just solve itself?""Relax," Dirk said. "You're trying too hard." He walked up behind her and placed his large, strong hands on her shoulders. "When I think too hard, I get a headache and then I can't think at all." His fingers and thumbs started to work the stiff muscles of her neck and back, digging into the knots of tension. "If I stop thinking, if I let it all go, Well, by the time the headache goes away, you've figured it all out and I don't have to think any more."The touch of his fingers felt good. It did relax her. It also made her horny as hell.Her eyes popped open. "That's it. We'll make our own movie.""What?" Dirk's hands dropped to his side and he took a step backwards.Tina spun around to face him. "We're going to reenact the crime."He glanced down at the cadaver outlines taped on the rug and then back at her. "You mean, " He tugged at the collar of his T-shirt. "You mean, we're going to have sex?"Tina was excited. The little shadows her erect nipples cast on her blouse made that obvious. And Tina's excitement was infectious. It made parts of Dirk's body get erect too. But he couldn't have sex with her, not again.Not that he didn't want to, because he did. He couldn't spend a minute in her presence without fantasizing about lifting her skirt and pulling down her panties. He thought about bending her over the desk and taking her from behind. But the truth was, he didn't want to just have sex. He wanted to make love to her.He wanted to undress her slowly, surrounded by the warm glow of candlelight and soft jazz playing in the background. He wanted to lay her down on a bed scattered with rose petals and take his time kissing every inch of her gorgeous body. He wanted to sink into her slowly, moaning her name as she whimpered how much she loved him. They would become one, both body and soul. It would be so beautiful, they'd climax together with tears in their eyes.Dirk wanted to make a baby with Tina. He'd never had a pregnancy kink before, but the other night he'd rubbed one out while thinking about fertilization. It was freaking him the fuck out. If he was going to get past this, past his obsession with his work supervisor, he'd have to go cold turkey and not have sex with her ever again."We're going to have sex?" he asked."No." Tina smiled awkwardly. "Of course not. No."Dirk wasn't sure if he felt relief or disappointment. "But we're reenacting the murder."She nodded. "The moments that led up to the murder, yes.""And in the moments leading up to the murder," he said, his eyes dropping once more to the body outlines taped on the rug, "Appleton and Snide were having sex."Tina laughed nervously and tucked her hair behind her ear. "Sure, but there's no need for us to actually, do, you know, that. Not this time.""You're not going to touch genitals?" Fact-Tel asked."No." She laughed louder. "We're just going to go through the motions.""Oh." Dirk definitely felt disappointed. "Like an old married couple.""Exactly." Tina gave him a friendly, little punch on the side of his arm. Then she patted him in the same spot, gently squeezing his biceps. A dreamy look flitted across her eyes and her lips curved into a half smile. "That's nice.""What?" Dirk wasn't sure what was going on."What?" She dropped her hand to her side and took a step back. "I'm sorry. What?""You're reenacting the murder," Fact-Tel reminded them."Of course we are. I'll be Sylvestra Snide." Tina walked to one of the cadaver outlines and carefully placed her feet on top of the outline's feet. "She was standing here with her panties around her ankles." Then she reached up her skirt and wiggled her hips until her underpants slipped down her legs.All Dirk could do for a moment or so was stare at the silky blue with yellow polka dots fabric resting on the tops of her boots. He had recently come to the conclusion that women's panties were like the cover to a really good book. He just wanted to open it and bury his nose in the tight prose inside. Tina's book, of course, he'd red before, but, as with all the classics, it was worth going back to again and again."You're Chesterfield Appleton," Tina said, her voice super cheery, much more cheery than the reenactment of a brutal crime called for. "He was standing there." She pointed to the other cadaver outline. "And he had his pants and underpants around his ankles.""Oh. Ok." Dirk took his place near her and unzipped his fly."You can leave your boxers on." Her eyes drifted down to his underwear. "Boxer briefs. Snug, black, boxer briefs. Those look good on you.""Thanks." He wasn't sure what else to say.She blinked a couple times, then looked up to meet his gaze. "Leave them on. No reason to take them off since we're probably just going to dry hump.""Oh." That didn't sound so bad. "Like Catholic high school students.""Exactly." She turned, so that her back was to Dirk. "This is the general area they were in when they were shot. When they fell, the force of the bullets probably knocked them back a few steps. So we have to figure out where they were at the moment right before they were shot.""The fireplace." Dirk, his jeans still around his ankles, shuffled forward a few paces. "They were probably watching themselves in the mirror.""Oh sure." Tina shuffled forward too and placed her hands on the mantelpiece, one hand resting on a cherub's face, the other on a bag of money. "Snide would have stood here.""And Appleton would have been here." Dirk took his place behind her and grabbed onto her hips, which were way lower than he had expected. "We do not line up. Not at all."He'd known Tina was short, that was obvious from the first time they met. He just hadn't realized how much shorter she was than him. Even with her high heels on, if they were actually going to have sex, he'd be fucking the small of her back.Had they never done it standing up before? He tried to think back to all the times they'd had to have sex for work. They must have done it standing up for at least one of them. When the safety of the general public was at stake, one didn't usually have the luxury of lying down. They had done it bent over a table like surface. Dirk must have been bending his knees more than he was aware of at the time.Oh wait. They had done it standing up, but face to face. He'd lifted Tina and she'd wrapped her legs around him before he nailed her to the wall. That was a good one, ve

We are sure that the technical issue that caused the original second half of this episode to be lost won't be noticed and the transition to the new recording will be seamless. Garl finds himself being the true hero of this game as he now has a near-death vision explaining what he needs to do before he dies. Level Up: 01:48:15 Also: * Squish Squish Squish * A Lot of Feet Talk * I Might Be The Threshold * Gary Busey in “Make Friends With The Devil” * Jim's second most hated song, Zephyr * Chrono Trigger! Final Fantasy! Hee hee!   This Week: Travel through the Sea of Stars! Next Week: Finish Sea of Stars!   Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcastThanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://bsky.app/profile/stevenmorrismusic.bsky.social and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots!Twitter: @squarerootspodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Hee hee hee we got a Beff, a Steph and a Phee

A 2-2 Premier League draw at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium means Wolves are unbeaten in their three games under new head coach Vitor Pereira. Hear from the gaffer on today's podcast, as well as goalscorers Hee-chan Hwang and Jorgen Strand Larsen following the result against Spurs. Wolves Express has been nominated for a 2025 Sports Podcast Award! Help to add more silverware to the Molineux trophy cabinet by casting your free vote here: https://www.sportspodcastgroup.com/sports_category/best-football-podcast/# Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Mikey Burrows, Andy Thompson and Lee Naylor discuss Wolves 2-0 Boxing Day win over Manchester United. Goals from Matheus Cunha and Hee-chan Hwang did the damage as Vitor Pereira made it back-to-back victories since becoming head coach. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's winter, so I thought it would be the ideal opportunity to talk about the weather and the various traditional events we generally do in winter, especially in Luxembourg. Did you know the seasons are a topic of the Sproochentest Oral Exam? If your goal is to sit the language exam to acquire Luxembourgish citizenship in the upcoming months, then tune in. De Wanter is a masc. noun so the winter is de Wanter. And in winter is am Wanter . Example: In Winter it is cold: Am Wanter ass et kal. ​​Let's start to talk about the weatherPrett? Da lass!- Mir schwätzen fir d'éischt iwwer d'Wieder. D'Wieder = the weatherWéi ass d'Wieder am Wanter zu Lëtzebuerg: How is the weather in Lux in Winter?Am Wanter ass et meeschtens reenereg, gro a kal. Et ginn e puer sonneg Deeg awer meeschtens ass et bedeckt. D'Temperaturen bleiwen oft ënnert 10 Grad, sou tëscht -4 an 6 Grad. In Winter it's mostly rainy, grey and cold. There are a few sunny days but it is mostly cloudy. The temp stay often under 10 degrees, so between -4 …Et ass seelen lëfteg allerdéngs bléist e kale wand and et schneit heiansdo. It is not often windy however a cold wind is blowing and sometimes it snows.To snow = schneien - pronunciation - it is snowing = et schneit: et schneit net oft zu Lëtz.The snow = de Schnéi - mir haten leschte Wanter vill Schnéi - we had a lot of snow last winterAm Wanter ginn d'Lëtzebuerger och gär an de Wantersport. Here we mean the winter sports holiday. Beipsill: Mir ginn ëmmer am Februar an de Wantersport fir Schi ze fueren: We always go to wintersportsd during vacation to skiing.An de Wantersport goen / fueren = to go to wintersports Schi fueren = to skiingDe Wanter zu Lëtzebuerg dauert 3 Méint an zwar vum 21. Dez bis den 21. Mäerz.Am Dezember ginn et vill traditionnel Fester an Evenementer. Dec is is filled with many traditions and events in Luxembourg. Hei sinn e puer typesch Fester Here are some typical feasts.Niklosdag oder Kleeserchersdag - den 6. Dezember. Wat ass d'Traditioun: 1 oder 2 Wochen virum 6. Dez stellen d'Kanner owes hir Schlappen virum Schlofzëmmer. A wann se brav waren fannen se deen nächsten Moien Séissegkeeten, Mandarinnen oder Nëss an hire Schlappen. Wann se net brav waren, kréien se entweeder näischt oder eng Rutt. De 5. Dez stellen d'Kanner en Teller virun d'Dier mat enger Muert an Hee fir dem Kleeschen säin Iesel an e Glas Mëllech mat Kichelcher fir de Kleeschen.A moies de 6. Dez fannen d'Kanner Spillsaachen, Schockela an Uebst an Nëss um Teller De 6. Dezember ass och schoulfräi fir d'Kanner déi an d'Primärschoul ginn.The historical custom is that a week or two before the 6 December, children put their slippers outside their bedroom at night. If they have been kind they will find a sweet or chocolate, or nuts or a mandarin inside their shoe the next morning. If they weren't kind then they get either nothing or a Rutt (a small stick or branch representing a switch). On the night of 5 December, children leave out a plate with some hay or a carrot for Saint Nicolas' donkey and a glass of milk and cookies for the man himself.And in the morning of Dec 6th chlidren find toys and chocoalte on their plate. The primary school children in state schools also get the day off as a holiday.An am December fänkt och de Chrëschtmaart un , the Christmas market! – Den traditionnele Chrëschtmaart ass op der Plëss (Place d'Armes) an och bei der Gëller Fra (the golden lady).Um Chmaart ginn et vill Buden mat Chrëscht Dekoratiounen, puer Attraktioune fir d'Kanner an natierlech och, vill Iessbuden mat

She's had the organist. Now she wants the Vicar.A Series in 17 parts, by Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Mia weakly raised her hand and switched off the shower."That was amazing, Gordy-pie. Organists really are good with their hands!""Not so bad yourself," he panted. "Wow. I enjoyed that immensely! You're quite a lass, Mia.""I'd like to see you play the organ," she said, stepping out of the shower and reaching for a towel."I need to get my breath back first!" He laughed, as Mia began playfully drying him off. "God, you're an eager little beaver aren't you?""Hee hee. Yes, but what I meant was, I'd like to see you play the church organ. I've not been inside a church for years. Jenna said that St Michael's is cool.""It's a nice church." I wonder what else she's told her? Gordon thought. "Why not come along to the Sunday service? You can see me in action there, so to speak. After the service, you can have a go on the organ if you'd like. Do you play any musical instruments?""Guitar and violin, but I've not practiced for ages.""Ah, so strings are your thing? That's good. It'd be nice to have a violinist in the choir. One of the choristers plays the trumpet. Which keeps him from singing and I'm glad of it as his voice is bloody awful."Mia sniggered. "You're funny, Gordy-pie. I really like you. Are all organists as fun as you?""Nay lass. I'm one of a kind. He pulled her close and kissed her neck and lips. He was an incredible kisser, and she was curious to know more about him."Are you married?""Long divorced," came his reply. "I'm married to the pipe organ, as they say." He wondered if Jenna had mentioned anything about their various liaisons over the past year, and was about to say something, when the bathroom door suddenly opened."Jen! Ever thought of knocking before entering?" Mia gasped, covering herself with a towel."I can't leave you alone for five minutes can I?" She turned to Gordon, who grinned sheepishly at her."Um, hello!""Funny place to have organ lessons, Gordon," Jenna said, as she watched him squirm."Gordy-pie was just showing me how good an organist is with his hands, weren't you?" Mia said, kissing him. "And you know what, he's amazing!""Oh I'm well aware of how good he is," Jenna replied, folding her arms.Sensing disapproval, Gordon attempted to explain. "It just happened. I didn't know your cousin was here," he prattled. "I put the plant pots in the yard, went into the kitchen and she was just there, wearing nothing but a towel!""You don't need to explain yourself, Gordy-pie. We've not done anything wrong," Mia said. "We're both single. Why are you so uptight, Jenna? Is it because we're in the vicarage? Is that like, a sin or something?"Jenna was in no position to claim the moral high ground. "No, no of course not. I was, just a bit surprised, that's all. It's fine. Just, try to be a bit more discreet, Mia. What if Simon had walked in?""Oh I'm sure the good reverend would approve," Gordon smiled, winking at her.The perceptive Mia noticed his gesture and wondered what he was hinting at."Jenna took a deep breath. "Okay, well I'm going to have a coffee. I'll leave you to get dressed. Do you want a drink, Gordon?""A tea would be lovely. I'm parched. Thanks!""I'll have tea as well, please." Mia added.Jenna left the bathroom."She's acting weird," Mia said. "There's something she's not telling me."Oh boy, wait until you find out, Gordon thought. Your mind will be blown."Maybe she's a bit envious!" Gordon said as he picked up his clothes, and wondered where his underpants had gone."Can I keep these, Gordy-pie?" Mia giggled, holding up his white briefs."Think they're too big for you!""I don't want to wear them. I want to keep them under my pillow and sniff them at night.""In that case, they're all yours! But I want your knickers in return!""Fair's fair!" She tossed him her pale pink cotton undies to him."Thanks!""I loved our shower time," Mia said, kissing him again. "And I loved your big cock. You're a sexy man, Gordy-pie.""Gordy-pie hopes Mia-pie can play with his organ again very soon!" the organist replied as they got dressed and headed downstairs.Jenna brought them both a cup of tea as they sat down in the lounge."Gordon, you're not going to put up with her calling you that cringey nickname are you?" she said, handing him the cup."I like it. It's cute," he said, as Mia rested her head on his shoulder."It's childish. If someone had called you that a year ago, you'd have bitten their head off. You used to have a terrible temper.""Ah well that was before I saw the light," he said, sipping his tea. "When you, showed me the way." He smiled at Jenna as she sat opposite them. "For that, you know I am forever grateful," he added."Did you become a born again Christian like Jenna, Gordy-pie?" Mia asked."I've always been a Christian," Gordon replied. "I just sin a lot, that's all. As we all do, right?" He raised an eyebrow at the vicar's wife. "But we keep praying for forgiveness every week, and luckily for us, God is the forgiving sort, eh?"The front door opened and Reverend Morris came in."Good lord, I need a large brandy!" He gasped, tossing the car keys on the table."What I have seen, can't be unseen, and what I've heard, can't be unheard!""Whatever's the matter Simon?" Jenna said, standing up."You were right, Jen. Gladys Wilcox and the churchwarden. They're, at it!""Told you so," Jenna said. "Actual sex? I'm not being ageist but can Gladys manage that at her age?""No. Regular vanilla sex would've been easier to deal with. Actually, I think gerbilling would be easier to deal with. But seeing Norman, naked in her backyard, wearing a pinny and being struck on his arse with a riding crop,”Jenna cleared her throat, trying to silence him, given that they had company." She treats him like a slave and he enjoys it!" The vicar continued, unaware there was an audience. "And there's more. She knows about the storeroom threesome, and you won't believe this, she proudly told me, that sometime during Lent, she performed oral sex on Gordon.""Ahem. Simon, shush, we've got," Jenna cringed. "Wait, what? She gave Gordon oral?"Mia's jaw dropped."Sucked him off whilst he was sat at the church organ! She'd wanted him to be her slave, but he declined. So she set her sights on Norman instead. Well we both know Gordon prefers a younger woman, right?" He turned round, and noticed Gordon sat on the settee, and Mia sat next to him."Oh, good afternoon Gordon!""I brought those plant pots you wanted," the organist meekly uttered.Later,Jenna and Reverend Morris sat on the settee watching an episode of Father Brown, although neither were really paying attention to it."I can't get that image out of my head. Gladys giving Gordon a blowjob and whipping Norman's bare buttocks. I know we've, engaged in some naughtiness, but I never imagined one of the oldest members of the church was into that sort of thing!""Good for her," Jenna replied. "Kinkiness aside, it's nice for her to have Norman as a lodger. I mean, she lives alone and in this day and age, older people can feel vulnerable. I know Gladys misses her hubby a lot.""Oh Bert. Yes. He was dead long before I came to St Michaels. Bishop George told me more about him. He was the organist before Gordon took over. Apparently he was quite a character.""I'm sure he was. And the current organist seems to be going the same way.""Jen, you seem a bit unhappy about Gordon having intercourse with your cousin today. Is that because you're protective of her or because of, well, I know how close you are to him?"Jenna sighed. "Oh Simon. I'm ashamed of myself. I actually felt jealous when I saw the two of them together. How selfish is that? After everything you did for me last year when it was my birthday, and you gladly accepted my dalliances with the other male members of the church. Can you forgive me? I wish to say a prayer of forgiveness."The vicar took his wife's hands in his. "Of course I can, my love. And I understand how you feel. You see, with Mia here, I think you've got something you've never had to deal with before.""What's that?""A rival!"Mia was eavesdropping from the staircase. A mischievous grin formed on her face as she listened."Holy shit, Jenna's had more men than Elton John's had wigs. She had the nerve to have a go at me for seducing Tom. And she's slept with Gordon too? No wonder she looked so tense. Ha! And sweet, Reverend Simon is okay with that? That's not what it teaches in the Bible, surely?"She slipped back to her bedroom."Let us pray together," Reverend Morris said."Father, I return to You with my sins before me. Nowadays, I lack compassion for my brother and sisters, my eyes are clouded with wrongdoings my heart is against. Opposing Your Words, I sinned and done evil in Your eyes. I drained myself off Your kindness and followed my worldly desires. Father, guide me as You are right in Your verdict and justified in Your judgment. Do not leave me astray as I pray for a blissful life with You and a life free of evil. In Your Mercy, I pray.Amen."-(Luke 15:18, Psalm 51:3-4)"I feel better," Jenna said, opening her eyes. She ran a finger down her husband's cheek. "Simon, let's go to bed. Mia's asleep. The guest bedroom is right at the other end of the landing. She won't hear us. Tonight I need my Vicar's touch,”"What a good idea! All this talk of Gladys Wilcox getting her hands on men's dicks, I'd quite like some hands on mine!"A Girl With FantasiesMia lay back on the bed in the darkness, her mind buzzing with the events of the day. Reaching under the pillow, she pulled out the pair of Gordon's briefs."Enjoyed you, Gordy-pie! You were a total sweetie."She sighed, pressing the crotch of the underwear against her nose and inhaling deeply, whilst fingering herself with her other hand. Gordon's undies bore a pleasant, musky, manly scent, a faint mark which she assumed was pre-cum, and a couple of wiry grey pubic hairs. Perfect. Knowing that the organist's thick cock had been snugly contained within was enough to make her climax again. She wondered if he was wanking off and sniffing her knickers."Hope he likes mine too." She wanted to see the organist again, as sex with him had been amazing, but Mia had her sights set on a bigger prize - and this one wore a clerical collar.InsomniaGordon was in bed, but having difficulty sleeping. His mind was a complete whirl. He reflected how in the past year, he'd gone from being completely sex-starved, to having more sex than he'd ever had during a whole fifteen years of marriage, and during his late teens, when he'd been a horny youth, desperate to sleep with any woman. In the Eighties, those halcyon pre-Internet days, just stumbling across a discarded porn magazine in the bushes was more valuable than gold. He remembered his time at university, when he used to spy on the nurses undressing at a nearby hospital.He chuckled as he remembered losing his virginity to his piano teacher - whilst she was giving him a tour of Blackpool Tower ballroom. He credited her with starting his interest in wanting to play organs,"Look at me now," he said out loud. "I got seduced by a woman young enough to be my daughter. Who is now the vicar's wife. I fucked a Ukrainian woman in the church. I've been fucking the vicar's wife every week in the church. I took part in a threesome with her and the vicar. I and several other men gave her a facial in the church. I got my dick sucked by an eighty-six year old pensioner too. Now I'm fucking the eighteen-year old cousin of the vicar's wife, and exchanging underwear with her."He reached for the pair of pink knickers and gave them a good sniff, stroking his cock at the same time. The crotch had dried, but earlier it had been wet and sticky with Mia's pussy juices. A heavenly scent."The world is a bloody mess right now, but I'd say my life is pretty good," he smiled. "I hope Mia wants to see me again. She's a lovely, horny little thing. I hope she comes to church this Sunday."He wanked himself off happily, before slipping into a blissful slumber. For the first time in a year, he dreamt of a woman other than Jenna.

Vicar's wife, Jenna, decides to give up sex for Lent!A series in 17 parts, by Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.  The Jenna series started  with ‘Jenna Goes To Church', followed shortly after with ‘Jenna, the Vicar's Wife'. It resumed recently with Jenna's New Year'; and now it continues with a Lentil 2-part story. Other episodes will follow.It was the last Sunday of Shrovetide, known as Quinquagesima. At St. Michael's Church, Reverend Morris had amassed a pile of old palm crosses, intending to burn them on Ash Wednesday."Shouldn't be long before the first members of the faithful arrive," he said to his wife Jenna, who was adjusting the flowers at the side of the pulpit."Oh before I forget, I've got something for you to burn on Ash Wednesday," she smiled, handing him a pair of her panties."This is an unusual-looking palm cross!" He replied. "I think I'd better burn this separately from the others! Is there some reason why you want your undies reduced to ash?""Well Simon, I've been thinking. And I've finally decided what I'm going to give up for Lent.""You're giving up wearing underwear?""Ha-ha. Tempting, but no. I'm giving up sex."Reverend Morris almost dropped the box full of crosses. "What? Sex? No, you can't be serious!"Jenna nodded. "I'm 100% serious, my love. Lent is supposed to be hard, and you're always going on about how part of being a good Christian is making sacrifices and so on. It's traditionally a time of fasting and abstaining from something to repent and focus our hearts and minds on the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.""Yes, but within reason, Jen! I don't expect you to suffer hardship as bad as that!""I can do it, Simon. I'm committed to seeing it through. It's only forty days.""B-but, that's six weeks!" the vicar whined, looking as if his entire world was about to end. "I, I'm not sure I can, er, go without for so long!""Now Simon, you're a man of God. You're stronger than most. I know you can do this. And just think how wonderful it will be when Easter comes, everything in calf, bursting out in spring glory, sap rising, mating seasons beginning, shoots thrusting upwards, days getting longer, ""Vicars dying of horniness, " Reverend Morris sighed."Exactly. And it won't just be you going without. The other chaps of this church will have to go without as well!""Oh my goodness, Jenna. There's going to be a lot of frustration building up in this church! When you say no sex, does that mean, ""No physical contact whatsoever, my dearest! No blowjobs, no kissing, no cock in cunt, nada! Just like social distancing."Reverend Morris' lip was trembling. "Not even a kiss?""Nope. I'll be sleeping in the spare bedroom until Easter. I can blow you a kiss. And whilst we can't do anything involving physical contact, there are other naughty ways we can get through Lent.""Like what?""Use your imagination, Simon!"He thought for a moment. "So I'll have to make do with dating Rosie Palms until Easter?""If it helps you cope, yes!"The reverend took a deep breath. "You're absolutely right, Jenna. I can get through this. I admire you so much for deciding to have a sex ban. In fact, I think I love you even more, and I didn't think that possible!""Aww. Ditto." She kissed him. "We'll make the most of Shrove Tuesday," she added, with a wink. "I'm going to do some creative things with pancakes."He slipped his arms around her. "Remember that morning after the Candlemas service, when we got soaking wet in the rain and we just ravished each other once we got back to the vicarage?""Hee hee, yes. Or that time last month during that short holiday in Lincolnshire when we stayed in that weird hotel, and the ghost gatecrashed our passion?""Bit early in the morning for that, isn't it? Then again, I'm not complaining!" A voice shouted, and they both looked round. Gordon the organist had just arrived.Moments later, Josh the curate appeared."Morning guys!" Jenna smiled. She turned back to her husband. "You'd better get your robes on. Looks like some of the congregation are here already. I'll go and hand out some hymn books."He nodded and headed off to the vestry. "Forty days," he sighed. "God, .I will really need your help through this difficult time!"And just how were some of the other male members of St. Michael's Church going to cope for forty days without any 'spiritual guidance' from the vicar's wife?Shrove Tuesday (the eve of Lent)On Shrove Tuesday, Jenna spent all afternoon mixing pancake batter. It would've been quicker to buy some ready-made pancakes from Tesco, but where was the fun in that? She looked at the kitchen wall clock."Come on Simon, you're late. How long does a meeting with the Bishop take?"Her husband had been out all day. At last, she heard his car pull up on the drive."Good. Now the fun begins."The front door opened and Reverend Morris came rushing in. "Sorry I've been so long. Bishop George kept prattling on for ages and then coming back home there's been a road accident so I had to take the long way home, oh I see you've been busy!" He noticed his wife was completely naked except for an apron."Welcome home," she smirked. "It's time to flip some pancakes. Is my randy reverend able to provide some batter?"He licked his lips. "What sort of batter would you be requiring?""Hmm, let's see. That special 'anointing oil' you used during my 21st birthday?" She whirled a frying pan in her hand and flipped a pancake. "Here's one I prepared earlier."His hands found her shoulders, and turned her to face him. His hands moved up to cup her face and Jenna felt his lips close around hers in a tender kiss. She returned it with rising passion, slipping her tongue into his mouth. As their tongues danced, Jenna quickly unfastened her apron, letting it slide down over her smooth skin to the kitchen floor.She could hear Reverend Morris unfastening his own garments, and when he embraced her tightly, she felt his bare skin press against hers with delicious warmth. Her husband's mouth left her lips, trailing down her neck to her chest. He took a nipple in his mouth and teased the erect tip. It was perhaps the upcoming sex ban enhancing his senses, but Jenna's breasts had never felt so full, and had never tasted so sweet. His hands roamed down over her arse, savoring her curves.Reverend Morris moved back up her body, his lips playing over her breasts, then back up her neck. Jenna's hands slid down his chest and at last reached their goal. She gripped his throbbing member, took a few steps backward, pulling gently but firmly, and he promptly followed her. She felt the edge of the kitchen countertop meet her lower back, and she swiftly heaved herself on to the cool granite surface and lay back, spreading her legs.Reverend Morris had a sudden urge to taste his wife; his tongue met with her soft skin just above her clit, then down into her folds, tasting, discovering and exploring all that she had to offer. He began to suck and lick her clit. How he loved to worship at this altar.Jenna reached for the bowl of pancake batter. A wooden spoon was sticking out of the bowl. Without hesitation, she began spooning the batter down her breasts."It tastes alright," she murmured, placing a blob of batter on her husband's nose. "But it needs an extra ingredient, ""Umm, I think I can help you there.""Fuck me religiously, darling." Jenna said hoarsely.A pair of strong, silky legs wrapped around the vicar's arse. He lowered himself onto her and felt those glorious batter-coated breasts rub against his chest as he began thrusting into her. He tried to set a steady, leisurely pace to begin, but the legs around him urged him on faster and harder. Reverend Morris responded with enthusiasm, and within moments he was pounding into his wife with all his strength, mindful that after tonight he wouldn't be able to do this for six weeks."Yes, yes, oh my God yes, I've never felt anything like it!" Jenna moaned."Bloody hell, I'm coming, oh Jenna!" Reverend Morris yelled as his stream of hot cum filled up her cunt and flowed back out onto the kitchen countertop.Jenna lay back on the countertop, eyes closed. It was several minutes before her breathing had calmed enough for her to speak."Did I provide enough batter?" Reverend Morris asked."Your holy offering was more than generous!""Forty days without from this moment on. You've still time to change your mind.""I'm sticking to it, Simon. We'll get through Lent. We'll have to think up some creative contactless ways to get our rocks off."The smell of burning interrupted them. They both glanced at the stove. To Jenna's dismay, the pancake she'd been cooking had been virtually cremated in the frying pan."Oh dear," she said, gazing at the remains of the pancake, which now resembled a lump of coal."Now that's what I call a perfect burnt offering for Ash Wednesday!" Reverend Morris replied.The Organist is Entertained.Gordon Leesmith always looked forward to Thursday evening arriving. This was when he had organ practice at church, and for the past few months he'd been teaching Jenna to play the organ. These lessons were really just an excuse for a passionate romp with the stunning vicar's wife, who was always more than willing to get her hands on the organ in his trousers, rather than the church one.Gordon hummed to himself as he brewed himself a cup of tea. He checked the time. It was only just after midday. Six hours to go. He was impatient and horny, but in a very happy mood. He'd just returned from seeing his Primary Care physician. That in itself something of a miracle in modern Britain; and received good news. His benign prostate enlargement wasn't as bad as he'd feared. Despite being a bit overweight, the doctor had given him a clean bill of health. His blood pressure was low, and so was his cholesterol.Today was his birthday. He was fifty six. A year ago, Gordon had been a miserable, short-tempered man who didn't endear himself to anyone else in the church. Long-divorced, impotent and frustrated with being alone for so long, his life had turned upside down when a young woman by the name of Jenna Fox had started attending St. Michael's Church. A few months later, she'd turned her attentions to flirting with him. Never in a million years did Gordon think he'd end up getting his cock sucked by a stunning redhead whilst he sat on the organ stool.As Gordon sipped his tea, his phone vibrated."Oh, an email from Jenna," he smiled, checking the message.Happy Birthday Gordon! About tonight. I'm afraid I can't make tonight's organ practice. I won't be able to until Easter arrives. Thing is, I've chosen to give up sex for Lent. I know you won't to hear this and it's going to be so hard for me to stick to this, but you've got to test yourself and set a challenge, right? It's what being a Christian is all about. I truly hope you'll understand. But - that doesn't mean we can't still have some fun! Make sure you visit the church - I've left a birthday present for you on the organ stool, trust me, it'll see you through this hard time. And when Easter comes, Jesus won't be the only person that rises, wink wink. It'll be worth the wait, keep your organ pipe warm for me.Love Jenna. xxx"She's abstaining from sex?" Gordon almost dropped his cup of tea. "Wait, what? Oh no! This is a nightmare! I won't be able to have a fuck for six weeks? Bloody hell! I'll go round the bend, I can't even call on Yulia's mate Martika anymore. Damn it, why did she have to bugger off back to Ukraine?"He wasn't sure whether to scream or burst into tears, but after he overcame the initial shock, he took a deep breath and composed himself.

 November transitions come to Saint Michaels.Based on the works by Blacksheep. Listen to the ► Podcast at Steamy Stories.Gordon & Miah Go On Holiday, before the hectic Advent flurry.Manchester Airport was busier than usual today. At Terminal 2, ranks of chairs were filled with passengers desperate to board flights to warmer climates. People from all walks of life headed along the concourse. Black, White, Asian, singles, couples, entire families, a group of American tourists arguing over the most mystical of all British customs -- queuing, cancerously-tanned tourists drifting homeward on the fumes of suntan lotion, pale tourists arriving with the damp smell of a cloudy country clinging to them -and drifting serenely through the crowds, a church organist and his much-younger girlfriend."Well this is it!" Miah grinned as she and Gordon made their way to the departure gate."Can't wait to get away from this awful weather!" Gordon replied, fiddling with his boarding pass. It was the middle of November. The rain had been relentless for the past few months, and showed no signs of easing.They boarded the Jet2 737 for the four and a half-hour flight to Tenerife South. They were seated in seats D and E on row 12 in the middle of the aircraft, which happened to be the emergency exit row. To Miah's delight, she'd got the window seat."Oh nice!" she exclaimed, noting the larger amount of legroom."Yeah, I was determined that we weren't going to be crammed in like sardines for four hours," Gordon replied, putting his hand luggage in the overhead bin. "Also, not wanting to sound like an anti-social old git, but I'd rather not sit next to anyone else either. Last year I had to fly to Poland, to help restore an old organ in Krakow. The outbound flight was a nightmare. Got wedged next to a fifty-stone bloke for two hours.""Also handy for other things," she winked at him as she fastened her seatbelt. "Our first holiday together. I can't believe it's actually happening. Oh Gordy, this is going to be unforgettable, I just know it."The flight was fully-booked and it seemed to take an eternity for everyone to board. Gordon observed the other passengers with his usual cynical eye. As a frequent flyer, he'd seen it all. This flight was no different. A middle-aged man wearing a Panama hat was taking his time, fiddling with the overhead bin, completely oblivious to the fact he was blocking the aisle. A family of four behind him tutted impatiently. A couple of rows in front, a young blonde woman with false nails and surgically enhanced lips was taking selfies, no doubt for Instagram. Gordon raised an eyebrow as she pouted and tilted her smartphone, almost elbowing an elderly man in the face. Obviously an influencer of some sort, he assumed. And what could be more glamorous than a selfie on a charter flight to Tenerife?Ah, the joys of modern air travel, Gordon thought to himself. And as soon as the seatbelt sign light goes out, folk will be up and heading to the loo.Miah was more interested in looking out of the window."I want this to be a wonderful time, Miah. I hope it's as fun for you as it will be for me." He kissed her gently. "A week of sun, sea and lots of food. I just hope you won't be bored. I mean, there are excursions we can go on, you don't need to be stuck round the pool all day..."She was quick to reassure him. "Gordy, that's perfection to me. Family holidays with my parents were never relaxing. Dad was an action man, always wanting to do adventure stuff -- paragliding, rock climbing. I never wanted to do anything like that. For one thing, I'm terrified of heights. So I was always dumped in the hotel's Kid's Club whilst they went off enjoying themselves. I never liked those activities. I just wanted to be on the beach. Best holiday I had was when I went to Turkey with Jenna and her parents when I was twelve.""Well our hotel is right on the beach, so you're all sorted!" Gordon smiled back. "A full week away from St. Michael's Church and its organ! Finally my fingers can get a much-needed holiday. Plus, it'll be nice not to have Reverend Morris emailing all the time.""His sermons never get any better do they?" Miah replied. "Jenna did say she was trying to help him there.""Hmm, she needs to try harder." Gordon fastened his seatbelt. The vicar's wife had many talents, but improving her husband's sermons didn't seem to be one of them. He cast his mind back to Easter Sunday service. "Is Jenna still in the Guild Voices choir?""Yes. She really likes it. Their choirmaster Derek said she has a perfect voice."Gordon chuckled to himself and wondered whether Jenna had worked her special magic on Derek. The fact she'd been using an egg vibrator during the Easter Sunday service seemed proof of that. Reclining in the seat, his mind briefly flashed back to his encounter with Harriet, his old crush. She'd be back in Australia now. He knew he'd never see her again. It was as if a long-abandoned loose end had finally been tied up -- an open door to his youth had closed. Her wise words about his relationship with Miah had emboldened him. Miah was his future now. No matter what happened. It was time to stop looking back.He was shaken from his thoughts as the plane's engines spooled up and Miah grabbed his arm. "Oh take-off. I love this part so much. I'm such a big kid. But it's so exciting!""Yeah. It is. I love it too."The 737 roared down the runway and rose into the sky, climbing through the dense cloud.Even when they had reached cruising altitude and levelled off, Miah's eyes remained fixated on the view from the window. Bright blue and nothing but a blanket of cloud obscuring the land far below.Seconds after the fasten seatbelts sign went out, some passengers rose from their seats and headed for the toilets, just as Gordon had predicted.An hour into the flight and the queue for the toilets had gone. The cabin was quiet and most people were glued to their phones and tablets. Miah glanced round. Now seemed the perfect time for one of her fantasies to become reality."Hey," she whispered in Gordon's ear. "Fancy joining the Mile High Club?"He laughed off her suggestion, then realised she was deadly serious. "Wait...you want to?""I've always wanted to!"He bit his lip. "It's a hell of a risk, Miah. If the cabin crew find out we could get fined. Some airlines ban you for life.""Seems a bit harsh. Two consenting adults wanting some private in-flight entertainment." Her hand squeezed his thigh and she unfastened her seatbelt. "Join me in the rear toilet...if you're brave enough! Knock twice."As she got up from her seat and started forward toward the rear of the plane, she noticed a man rise from a seat farther forward in the cabin and glance back at her. The guy was about fifty, brown hair, bearded and of a stocky build like Gordon.This was no stranger.For an instant, Miah thought that perhaps the man was, in fact, a minor celebrity. He looked away from her after a fraction of a second of eye contact, stepped into the aisle, and moved forward towards the toilet at the front of the plane. He reminded her of someone, but try as she might, she couldn't make the connection. Thinking no more about it, she carried on to the toilet.In his seat, Gordon scratched the back of his head and wondered what to do. The thought of actually joining the infamous club had got him half-erect already. He rubbed his growing crotch bulge and decided to go for it. Now was his chance. It wouldn't be long before the cabin crew started the in-flight food and drinks.In the plane's tiny rear cubicle, Miah had positioned herself against the wall and prayed that Gordon hadn't chickened out. Two knocks on the door made her stomach lurch in excitement. She opened the door."Gordy! You're here!" She slipped her dress off her shoulders."What's this? A nervous flyer?" Gordon grinned as he squeezed into the toilet cubicle and quickly closed the door."Actually this flight is too boring," she teased. "Needs more turbulence.""Well now. I know how to make it better."He pushed her up against the wall, and whispered into her ear with hot, seductive breath. "This is your Organist Captain speaking."Before Miah could comprehend exactly what he said, Gordon was all over her with a love so fierce. His hands roamed her bare shoulders and neck as he smothered her lips, nipping against her earlobes and bare skin. He kissed the sensitive skin below her jaw, making her tilt her head back. He kissed on, licking and grazing it, knowing he had hit a sweet spot.Gordon brought her face down with his hands, kissed her as she moaned lightly into his mouth. This pleased him immensely as he moved his hands down till they rested against her breasts. Miah knew nothing but bliss when he applied his sweet pressures. She began to gasp and pant as he pinched the sensitive rosebuds under her thin cotton dress. She didn't care as she felt him slide her bra straps down her shoulders.He was desperate to ravish her and she wanted him more than anything else in the world. The low hum of the plane's engines seemed to add to his arousal."You're so big. Mmmm. I can't wait until I feel you inside my mouth." She said as she unzipped his trousers and pulled his dick out of his underpants.Softly, Miah ran her fingers over the heated flesh of his erect manhood. He took a sharp intake of breath at the feeling of her hands on him, and groaned. Tenderly, she encircled his organ with her right hand and gave it a few quick strokes. Gordon groaned from deep within his throat and moaned her name. Her face inched closer and closer to his penis. She could feel the energy pulsing through the veins and realised she alone was responsible for its arousal. She took a certain amount of pride in that fact.Miah's tongue lashed out at the head of Gordon's cock, slowly licking the bulbous head."Ah..." He groaned. In the cramped confines of the toilet cubicle, his hands found her silky brown hair, as Miah's tongue lolled around his shaft like she was sucking on an orange slice. Slowly, she took more of his manhood into her wet, sucking mouth. Gordon was enjoying himself to no end. The things this woman could do with her tongue! She licked every inch of his cock, running her tongue across every vein, igniting every nerve ending. His breathing had picked up, Miah noticed. She began to increase her ministrations. She created a stimulating suction with her mouth and began to bob her head back and forth using her tongue to stimulate the underside of his cock."Fuck!" Gordon said in a strained tone. "Do you h-have...oh...do you have any idea what you're doing to me? Ah!""Umm hmm," she replied. And just to prove her point, she began to suck him off harder.His orgasm was coming now, hard and fast. "I'm going to cum," he grunted."Not yet, Gordy. Need you inside!"Gordon quickly positioned himself between her legs as he continued to relish his girlfriend's sweet moans and kisses. Pulling her wet knickers aside, slowly, he began to tease her clit, receiving surprised gasps. He watched as he rolled one of her small breasts while thrusting a finger in and out of her glistening cunt. She flinched, and cried out in joy when she felt him thrust in two fingers."I think you're ready to join the Club," Gordon whispered. "I know I am. Shall we?""Yes!"And he thrust his large cock into her, and entered into the depths of her feminine waters.He was inside her, thrusting away, grunting, yelling her name. Miah held onto him tight, her legs wrapped around his sides."Oh Gordy, sweet Gordy..."Her body shuddered, riding wave after wave of heat and unexplainable emotions. Just as he felt her walls tightening and squeezing him, he felt himself release deep inside of her, shooting his cum deep into her tight and quivering pussy..."Oh fucking hell, yes!" Gordon yelled.A furious knocking on the door brought them crashing down to earth."Oh shit.""Um, just a minute!" Miah yelled, her voice shaky. She pressed the button to flush the toilet and Gordon quickly withdrew.Outside, a small queue had formed. "Whoever's in there must be trying to flush themselves down the bog. They've been in there ages!" a woman muttered to the air steward.Gordon zipped up his trousers and unlocked the door. He took a deep breath. "Okay, brace yourself. Hope whoever knocked isn't too pissed off with us!" He slid the door open and came face to face with a growing line of passengers."About bloody time!" the man in the Panama hat yelled. Some of us have prostate trouble you know!" He fell silent as Miah squeezed out of the toilet behind Gordon."Er, guess it's time we returned to our seats," Gordon smiled through gritted teeth.There were a few shocked gasps, while others cheered and clapped."Looks like you two have earned your wings, the steward said, with a wink.Advent At Saint Michael's: Jenna has a dilemma. Can the Bishop help her?"This year has absolutely flown by," Reverend Morris said as he read through the latest edition of the parish magazine. I can't believe it's almost the first Sunday of Advent!""It's been quite a year," his wife replied, looking very much troubled."Are you alright Jen?" Reverend Morris looked at her. "Something's bothering you, I can tell."Jenna let out a sigh. "Oh Simon. I'm just so disgusted with recent events. I can't believe what's happened.He knew at once what she was referring to. "Ah. You mean the Archbishop of Canterbury resigning. No-one was more disgusted than I was. To think, we had to go and dine with him at Bishop George's house last year! Bowing and fawning over him whilst he prattled on about Africa and equal opportunities. That lying, hypocrite of a man had the nerve to threaten me over some 300 year old plaque in my church with the most tenuous link to slavery. And all the time he was covering up for some vile abuser!" He slammed his fist down on the coffee table and it was the first time Jenna had seen her normally mild-mannered husband look so enraged."Makes me feel sick!" He added. "Good riddance. I hope whoever replaces him will be an actual Christian this time."Not as sick as I feel, Jenna thought to herself. Had I known what the Archbishop was truly like, I would never have given him a blowjob at that dinner party! But at the time it was necessary to stop him going public over the offending plaque in Saint Michael's church.Reverend Morris composed himself and sighed. "In times like this, I always find my faith tested. These people at the top have turned away from God. I just hope our dear little church doesn't suffer."Jenna embraced him. "That won't happen, Simon. I'll make sure of that!""I'm feeling better already. We're approaching such a busy and important time in the church calendar. And your birthday too!"The shocking scandal engulfing the C of E had at least meant that Bishop George had long forgotten Reverend Morris' little dalliance with Sandra Conway at the vicarage garden party back in August. He took a deep breath and wondered if he was ever going to finish his sermon in time for the Sunday service.Meanwhile, over at 64 Stovepipe Avenue, Gordon the organist had no such worries.He whimpered and squirmed. It was getting hard to form thoughts between the tickling, let alone words, and the corners of his vision were fuzzing with pink mist that blended in with the view of Miah's of jiggling, bouncing breasts smothering him."Has my sexy organist been a naughty boy?" She teased, tickling his balls."You always bring out my naughty side...ah! Oh! Not down there!"Hee hee...Now I'm going to..."Suddenly, Gordon's smartphone rang, disturbing their afternoon pleasure."Oh ignore it," he mumbled, in between kissing his girlfriend. The annoying ringtone continued, before the phone finally went silent. "What were you going to do?""Open your diapason," Miah giggled, wrapping her hand round his cock. "That's the right term, yes?""Oh yes," he replied, sucking on her nipples. "You've already made me Swell to Great!" Gordon always loved it when pipe organ-themed words were used during sex.The phone rang again."Damn and blast it," Gordon exclaimed, reaching over to the bedside table. "Can't have five minute's peace. I should've switched it off.""Better answer it, it must be important," Miah said, licking the tip of his cock.

Hee-haw! We're going out West! Battles and Jon join the Mousekewitz family to follow a new dream but with the same beats as the first movie. Are you Team "Dreams to Dream" or Team "Somewhere Out There"?Battles' Instagram: @embattzOur Bar Instagram: @ourbarnycCharms 4 Less Instagram/TikTok: @charms4lessseriesPodcast Socials -Email: butasongpod@gmail.comFacebook: @butasongpodInstagram: @butasongpodTikTok: @butasongpodTwitter: @butasongpodNext episode: The Muppets Mayhem - Season 1!

“Gott es onse Tooflucht uk onse Krauft. Hee es eene jewenschte Help en grooteNoot.” Psalm 46:2 The post Gott Halpt un woakt äwa Ons! appeared first on Lighthouse Gospel Church.

Crónica de estos dos magníficos festivales que recientemente hemos tenido el placer de disfrutar: el Jeonju International Sori Festival, en Corea del Sur, y el Festival Arabesques, en Montpellier, Occitania, Francia. Evocamos algunos momentos musicales allí vividos y compartimos las palabras de sus directores, Hee-sun Kim y Habib Deschraoui. Chronicle of these two superb festivals that we have recently had the pleasure to enjoy: Jeonju International Sori Festival, in South Korea, and Festival Arabesques, in Montpellier, Occitania, France. We evoke some musical moments experienced there and share the words of their directors, Hee-sun Kim and Habib Deschraoui. – Mouss et Hakim – Abrid – Origines contrôlées (Chansons de l’immigration algérienne) – Raïna Raï – Hagda – Raina Rai live (Oran 2002) – Sarāb – Mā bahwa had – Arwāḥ hurra – Vołosi – Red light – 200 weeks ago – Randy Raine-Reusch – Peak of Cheung Chou – Doors to the Forbidden City – Chae Sujeong – Gwanwoo horyeong – Chae sooJung’ Jeokbyeokga – TarantaCeltica – Jonny O’Leary Goes to Monasterace – Live in Calabria Voces invitadas: Guest voices: – Habib Deschraoui (Festival Arabesques) – Hee-sun Kim (Jeonju International Sori Festival) 📸 Chae Sujeong, Jeonju International Sori Festival 2024

This week the crew talks about a nuber of topics.  Sorry for the delayed show Tyler was busy traveling! Hence the name of this podcast!! Hee hee!Lara whines about doing domestic flights as if she is an international

On today's Wolves Express, we get excited about the launch of the 2024/25 SUDU 3rd kit! Gemma Frith has been at SUDU HQ to get a sneak peek ahead of the kit launch on the Official Wolves App. Plus, we hear from Hee-chan Hwang and Matheus Cunha on how playing in the Premier League is a dream come true, whilst Wolves Women goalscorer Amber Hughes reacts to Sunday's big win at Burnley. Find more of the latest Wolves news on the Official Wolves App and at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tim D'Alfonso has constructed an excellent Monday crossword -- his debut! -- with a smile-inducing theme and some fun cluing, including 42D, Your of yore, THY; 43D, Start of a donkey's bray, HEE; and the nostalgia-inducing 25D, ________ Sketch (classic toy), ETCHA. This was a great puzzle and likely a confidence-builder for those just starting to do the NYTimes crosswords, we approve: 5 squares on the JAMCR scale.Show note imagery: Dame Judi DENCH, as M, in SkyfallWe love feedback! Send us a text...Contact Info:We love listener mail! Drop us a line, crosswordpodcast@icloud.com.Also, we're on FaceBook, so feel free to drop by there and strike up a conversation!

Hear from gaffer Gary O'Neil, club legend Andy Thompson and forwards Hee-chan Hwang and Jorgen Strand Larsen on today's Wolves Express following the Old Gold's 1-1 draw with Nottingham Forest. Find more of the latest Wolves news at www.wolves.co.uk and on the Official Wolves App. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Merriam-Webster's Word of the Day for May 1, 2024 is: cohesive • koh-HEE-siv • adjective Something described as cohesive sticks together and forms something closely united. The word is usually used with abstract terms in phrases like "a cohesive social unit" or "a cohesive look/aesthetic." Cohesive can also be used to describe something, such as the design of a room or the plot of a movie, that is coherent—in other words, logically or consistently ordered. // The couple chose their wedding colors and designs carefully to make sure everything had a cohesive look. // The customer service department is a small but cohesive team. See the entry > Examples: "The collection showcases a harmonious blend of modern aesthetics and classic craftsmanship, allowing customers to create cohesive outdoor environments that enhance the beauty of their surroundings." — Business Insider, 16 Mar. 2024 Did you know? The Latin verb haerēre has shown remarkable stick-to-itiveness in influencing the English lexicon, which is fitting for a word that means "to be closely attached; to stick." Among its descendants are adhere (literally meaning "to stick"), adhere's relative adhesive (a word for sticky substances), inhere (meaning "to belong by nature or habit"), and even hesitate (which implies remaining stuck in place before taking action). In Latin, haerēre teamed up with the prefix co- to form cohaerēre, which means "to stick together." Cohaerēre is the ancestor of cohesive, a word borrowed into English in the early 18th century to describe something that sticks together literally (such as dough or mud) or figuratively (such as a society or sports team).

One Pack week is a celebration of the diversity, equality and inclusion that makes Wolves the club that it is today. On this special Wolves Express episode, we hear from representatives from across the club such as Hee-chan Hwang, Mario Lemina, Maximilian Kilman and John Richards, as well as Wolves Women player Destiny Toussaint and Men's Disability captain Daz James. Get more of the latest Wolves news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Juan David Betancurelnarrodororal@gmail.comHoy seguimos con la historia de Perseo. Como veíamos la semana pasada Perseo comenzó una gran aventura.   Había una vez en la antigua Grecia un hijo de Zeus y Danae llamado Perseo. Este Perseo resulto un gallito de pelea y en una de esas le dio por decirle a Polidectes que el le traería la cabeza de Medusa, que era una de las 3 gorgonas y como el pelao no sabía de lo que hablaba Atenea y Hermes lo convencen que primero vaya y averigüe bien como es el mani. Así que debe ir donde las tres grayas, Y que se datee bien donde viven las gorgonas, como caerles, como preparearse en fin todo lo posible para que no le den en la cabeza muy rapidito.  Y así sucedió. El Perseo cogio el escudo de atenea y la espada que le dio Hermes y salió como decidido para las que sea.  Llego pues Perseo al extremo oeste del mar mediterráneo y allí vio una gruta con una pequeña luz. Subió por un acantilado y entrando en la gruta vio lo que le habían advertido. 3 viejas feas y con un solo ojo y un solo diente.  Mejor dicho Perseo se mosquio todo porque no sabía como enfrentarlas. Pero como era bastante inteligente les monto conversa inmediatamente así. Señoritas que gusto de verlas por aquí en esta cuevita tan bonita. Las 3 grayas que nunca veían gente visitándolas se asustaron y entre las 3 se pasaban el ojo para ver quien les hablaba. Y vieron ese muchachote que las miraba y les sonreía.  Por su parte Perseo les seguía diciendo. Pero si ustedes 3 se ven muy lindas juntas. Hee a mi si me dijeron que viniera para verlas ya que aparte de bellas son muy sabidas.  Pa que. Las tres grayas podían ser muy viejas y feas pero eran féminas y las palabras de Perseo les subio el orgullo y lo recibieron con los brazos abiertos. Diga mijito que desea, entrese y tomese un cafecito con nosotras….. Para que le podemos servir. Diga pues no más.  Y Perseo que sigue con la lisonjeadera y al final les dice…. Pero díganme ustedes disque tienen 3 hermanas que son lindas…. Pero no tan lindas como ustedes, las tales gorgonas. Sera que me pueden decir donde viven para ir a visitarlas.   Las grayas que podían ser vanidosas pero no tontas se dieron cuenta que este muchacho las estaba endulzando con palabras bonitas para que ellas le dijeran el camino hacia las gorgonas. Así que comenzaron a cambiarle el tema y a tratar de embolatarlo.  Pero Perseo que no era que tuviera mucha paciencia se fue desesperando y de un salto les quito el ojo con el que ellas veían en turnos. Luego les quito el diente que necesitaban para morder y comer y luego les dijo Pues lo siento mucho pero yo necesito saber donde viven sus hermanas. Así que si no me lo dicen no podrán volver a ver o a comer.  Las grayas que ya no podían ver con el ojo le dijeron  Esta bien muchacho. Usted gana pero le cuento que apenas salga de aquí le vamos a poner muy malos reviews….  Y luego le dijeron cual era el camino que tenía que seguir, pero que de paso tenía que caerle a las ninfas que guardaban la entrada ya que ellas tenían los 3 objetos que necesitaría para enfrentar a las gorgonas. Estos eran. Las botas aladas que le permitiría volar, el casco de hades que lo haría invisible y una alforja llamada kibisis para guardar cosas. Finalmente le dijeron.  Mijito solamente le advertimos una cosa. Usted esta muy lindo y muy acuerpado. Esas ninfas son una cosa seria, son muy alebrestadas y coquetas. Así que cuidado y se deja embaucar por ellas. Lo pueden dejar por allá encerrado y quien sabe que cosas ricas le pueden hacer.  El Perseo finalmente les resulto falton a la

On today's Wolves Express, we get the latest from Gary O'Neil's press conference where he revealed that Hee-chan Hwang is back in contention, whilst former Wolves boss and current Nottingham Forest manager Nuno Espirito Santo speaks ahead of the Old Gold's trip to the City Ground on Saturday. Find more of the latest club news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Gary O'Neil reveals the extent of the injuries to Hee-chan Hwang, Pedro Neto, Craig Dawson, Matheus Cunha and Jean-Ricner Bellegarde following Wolves FA Cup defeat to Coventry. Find more of the latest club news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Saint Michael's hosts a town celebration.By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.Young Men of the ChoirChoir practice at St. Michael’s church was always a lively affair.  Yet, for the past year or so, it lacked a full spectrum  of harmony, because of the ailing older men who provided base and baritone fullness to many of the arrangements.Recently, it had become a lot harder on Gordon’s ears due to a couple of new members. James and Jordan were two eager eighteen-years old, and the twin sons of Debbie the Sunday school teacher. They both hit puberty rather late, having had vocal changes occur at about their 16th birthday.  Last month Gordon overheard the two brothers shout cheers for their favorite Premier League team, while getting in their car, after Sunday morning service.The husky, revelry, inspired Gordon to take on the challenge of refining the twins into a huge asset for the church choir. That enthusiasm diminished after their first choir practice.“I’ve got my work cut out, getting that lot into shape ready to sing at the community coronation celebration, next month!” Gordon told Jenna at their weekly ‘organ practice.’ “They’re bloody awful. I know they’re Debbie’s boys and she’s chuffed they’re finally getting involved in church life, but I fear they’re tone deaf!”“Oh dear, that’s no good,” Jenna said as she finished playing Crown Him with Many Crowns and then readied herself to play a much more interesting organ.Jenna could feel Gordon rubbing his hardening cock against her arse. It was then that she had an idea."I think I should give those two boys some extra inspiration,” she smiled. “Maybe they’re not completely tone deaf. With a bit more instruction, their voices might be passable.”“Hmm, maybe.” Gordon replied, his voice shaking with arousal. “They're coming in tomorrow afternoon for extra instruction and vocal training. I’ve taught some pretty poor choirboys and choirgirls over the years. Some did vastly improve and go on to have terrific careers in music.”Jenna switched off the organ and slid round on the stool. “Do you want me, Gordy?” She asked, darting her tongue between his lips. “Tell me how much, if you do,”"Desperately!” He growled. “My God, you’re so fucking hot! Pardon my language, I forgot we’re in the church.”“You say the loveliest things.”Gordon was hornier than usual tonight. He’d recovered from a bad cold and was eager to make up for lost time. Adjusting the open-fronted black robe he always wore in church, he tried furiously to unbuckle his belt and unzip his trousers with one hand while feeling his way to unfasten Jenna’s blouse and bra with the other.“Oh, organ daddy is eager tonight!” She cooed. “Swell to Great!” she added, referring to one of the organ stops, which in recent months had become a double entendre.“I’ve already swelled,” Gordon sighed, as he feasted on her beautiful tits. “Oh Jenna, Daddy needs you so much.”“Let me give you a hand, then.” She pulled out his thick cock and began stroking it.His shaking hands were soon pulling her soaking wet panties to one side and he wasted no time in sinking his entire cock straight into her hot, wet cunt. When he was completely inside her, he started to slowly pump it in and out, making the strokes longer and faster, banging her back and arse against the organ’s manuals, until she was literally screaming with pleasure. Her cries echoed through the empty church.“Oh my darling Jenna! Yes!” Gordon groaned. “You’re such a good girl! I love fucking your nice, ripe, young cunt! You’re going to make me cum hard! I’m going to fill your young body with so much cum! Ah!”Gordon’s thick, hot load spurted fast, deep and hard into her.“Ahh, that was lovely,” she whispered in his ear. “You always pull out all the stops!” Jenna gasped as they recovered from their intense orgasms. Once again, the organist had left her thoroughly entertained. She rested her head on his shoulder and he gently slipped his arms around her.“Do you remember the first time we, did it?” Gordon replied, planting soft kisses on her forehead. “Such a long time ago, when you seduced me right here on this organ stool and I hopelessly surrendered to your charms?”“Hee hee. How could I forget that? You were powerless to resist. And so shy at first,”"Me? Shy?” Gordon spluttered. “I think not, I was just stunned.”“You blushed when you came back from the gents and saw me sat here on the stool!”“Organists don’t blush! We just, swell.” Gordon replied, though his cheeks were already turning several shades of red.“Of course,” Jenna replied, running her fingers through his thick, silver hair.“And let me fill in for you, tomorrow. I want those fellas to get a vision for how they can add to the choir.”The next day, Jenna was in church alone, practicing a few pieces of music on the organ. Sensing the presence of someone, she stopped and peered over the top of the partition.“Oh good. They’re here.”“Good afternoon you two!” She announced, as James and Jordan headed down the aisle. The two blonde-haired lads looked surprised to see the vicar’s wife.“Oh, Mrs. Morris,” Jordan exclaimed. “Is Gordon here? He asked us to meet him here for some extra choir practice.”“Afraid Gordon’s needing me to fill in. Hope you’re not too disappointed.”They both looked at each other. “As if! Gordon’s a bit,”"Strict?” Jenna replied. “Yes he is, but he’s been organist and choirmaster for a long time and he takes his job very seriously. This coronation concert is really important for the church. The Mayor will be attending. So it’s important that we get those voices of yours up to scratch. I think a little bit of extra inspiration is needed.”“Some parishioners heard the two of you chanting support for your favorite Premier League football team, a few weeks ago.  Is that true?”“Manchester, all the way!” James beamed.“Ah, great team!” Jenna affirmed. “So, do me a favor, please. Can you two repeat that chant you shouted in the car park?”The guys repeated their team Busby Boys chant;Hello, helloWe are the Busby BoysHello, helloWe are the Busby BoysAnd if you are a City fan surrender or you’ll dieWe all follow UnitedJenna looked puzzled. “Fellas, I'm having a hard time believing that's what they parishioners were treated to in the car park? Gordon said he heard a very masculine machismo boistering.  He heard passion, bravery, smack-talking cockiness. Let's try again, but I'm going to join you, okay? And if either of you hear my voice overpowering your powerful masculine cheers, it is to your shame.”Jordan began the Busby Boys chant again, and the twin baritones filled the high ceilings of the great sanctuary with the richest a-capella Jenna had ever heard since joining the church a year ago.James and Jordan were breathing heavily, and feeling great affirmation of what they have the vocal power to do, in that place of worship.“Bravo!” Jenna cheered, clapping her hands. This is the raw masculinity that our church needs in worship. Gordon can teach you technique and tone, but Manchester United is where you found your masculine identity. Can you bring that with you to practices and performances?”“Uh, sure;” Jordan said.  James nodded.Jenna slid herself off the organ stool in such a way as to ensure a flash of her panties. She had put on one of her favorite short black dresses, which was hardly suitable attire for church. She’d borrowed Gordon’s black robe. It was unzipped in front, but too big for her and kept slipping off her shoulders.“This thing’s not my size at all,” she muttered. “Best left for Gordon.” She removed it, and sensed the two lads eyeing her up as she draped it over a pew. She was wearing a sleeveless black dress that clung in all the right places.Jordan gave a cough. “Um, Mrs. Morris,”"Jenna, please. No need to be so formal. You’re not at school now, are you? In fact I shouldn’t be calling you choirboys at all, seeing as you’ve just turned eighteen. I think choirmen would be more suitable, yes?”“Yeah!” They both gave nervous grins.“Well I'm a woman,” Jenna explained. “I can tell you, the good women of the church really want the men to be men. Good men, virtuous, but men. Please promise me you'll continue to be the men God created you to be? And you're a perfectly matched pair of baritones. You have no idea how incredible your resonance can be, if you refine your craft.”“Okay, we’ll just have an hour going over the pieces that Gordon mentioned. Nothing too intense. How does that sound?”“Great, yeah.” James said with new enthusiasm.“James, is it true that you want to be an organist some day?”“That’s right. I start uni in September.”“Let's get the sheet music Gordon assigned for this week,” Jenna turned away and fiddled with some music books on the shelf at the side of the organ, bending at the waist and swaying a bit more than she needed to.“She is well fit!” Jordan whispered to his brother.“Wish she’d take over from Gordon permanently! Yeah. I’d do her.” James boasted.Jenna smirked to herself, then stood back up and faced James; “My my, aren’t you eager?”James froze. Shit, she overheard! “To sing? Oh sure, we wanna get this right.” He awkwardly scratched the side of his head.She walked  a couple steps over to him, and carelessly dropped one of the music books on the floor. She squatted down in front of him. Gazing up, she could see the outline of a massive cock hardening behind the skinny jeans he was wearing.“Oh, not just to sing!” Jenna said, and slowly slid her hands up his thigh. James just stood there, stunned, not knowing what to do or say. Her fingers were soon tracing the outline of his big, thick, long cock through his jeans.“Oh my, James!” Jenna said, “You are a big fella.”Jordan gawped as the vicar’s wife continued caressing his brother’s thigh.“So; who wants to go first?” Jenna looked to James, then over to Jordan.“Umm,” they both mumbled.“James,” Jenna said, massaging his cock through his jeans, “I think someone wants to come out and say hi, don’t you?”“Uh, yes!” He gasped, blushing.Jenna unfastened his jeans, and pulled them and his boxers down to his knees. She was pleasantly surprised. Definitely a cock worthy of an organist, or future organist! “You truly are an organist!”She aimed his aching erection straight for her open mouth, and didn’t stop until she had thrust his whole shaft straight down her warm, wet throat.“Whoa, holy shit!” James groaned as Jenna worked her amazing talented, tongue, swirling round and round his youthful cock. A few seconds of her incredible cock-skills was all he could take and he was soon pumping a whole load of hot cum straight down her lovely throat.“Fuckin’ 'ell!”Jenna greedily swallowed every drop, her unblinking eyes gazing up at him the whole time. She even kept on gently sucking long after she’d already sucked him completely dry.“Delicious! What a good man you are, James. I’d say you hit all the right notes there and are perfectly tuned-up! Now how about your brother, pipe?”Jordan didn’t hesitate, and soon had his jeans unzipped. Jenna wrapped her fingers around his aching cock. Like his brother, he was generously endowed, and quick to rise to the occasion, however his lack of experience would mean a swift conclusion. Nothing wrong with that, of course. They were young and eager. In time, they could be molded into excellent lovers.Jenna thought about the time she seduced the nervous, virgin curate in the church hall’s storeroom. Thanks to her, Josh was now full of confidence and an expert in the bedroom, and he had recently got engaged.Her hand was pumping Jordan’s nice, young cock good and hard.“Oh God, fuck yes!”She leaned in and licked the head of his cock a few times, before running her tongue up and down the length of it. Her lips kissed and sucked the tip of his cock as her tongue teased it a few times. It twitched uncontrollably. Jenna slid it into her mouth while looking intently into his eyes.Jordan pressed his hips forward and was surprised to see her eagerly take the entire length of his member into her mouth. She grabbed his ass cheeks and pulled him tight. She sucked his shaft hard, making him yell with pleasure. She savored the taste of pre-cum.“Oh Jenna! I’m gonna cum!”The vicar’s wife began to suck him harder, her tongue sliding over and around his cock as her head as was pushed and pulled back and forth. She sucked Jordan’s cock for all it was worth, caressing his balls at the same time.Oh dear God, then it came, what she was waiting for. Jordan’s cock erupted in a white creamy fountain; he couldn’t stop. He was groaning in ecstasy. Jenna swallowed every drop, gulping it down.“Umm, tastes so good! Another yummy load. You really needed to unload, didn’t you?Jordan's eyes were now closed and he was breathing heavily.Well, that gets you fully tuned-up, too. I guess we’re about done here,” Jenna said, standing up and planting a kiss on both their cheeks. “But, we’d better do a bit of singing as well. "I’ll give you a few minutes to, compose yourselves, then meet me at the piano. Then we’ll sing Onward Christian Soldiers! If you boys can sing as expertly as you shoot your cum, the coronation service will be a massive success!”Polishing the Mayor's Ceremonial MaceIt was Thursday morning and the coronation of King Charles III was by now, tantalizingly close. Over at St Michael’s vicarage however, all was not well.“What do you mean we can’t have a street party outside the church this Sunday?” Reverend Morris exclaimed. “There was no problem last year when we had the Jubilee celebrations.”The council official at the end of the line muttered something about it being the Mayor’s rule, and hung up.“Bloody councils,” the vicar moaned. “Full of useless overpaid pen-pushers. The Mayor’s coming to visit our church later today too. I’ve a good mind to raise the issue with him face to face.”Jenna raised an eyebrow. “I thought being a mayor was just a ceremonial role. How come he’s not letting the church hold a street party?”“Some red tape about obstructing the King’s Highway or something.”“But we’re holding a party to honor the new King! Surely rules can be waived just this once?”“We could always pretend to be eco protesters,” Reverend Morris remarked.Jenna uncrossed her legs and began thinking. “That Mayor needs some persuading. "I can’t have Simon’s plans ruined by pesky red tape,”Mayor Harrison Buckingham rolled his eyes as he turned into the small car park of St Michael’s church hall."Right, time for another tedious hour shaking hands with old ladies and giving fake smiles,” the corpulent man muttered as he parked the Jaguar.“Keys,” his wife replied.“What, you’re not coming in with me?”“Not a chance. You can do this all by yourself, darling. I’m off to the Trafford Centre for a spot of retail therapy.”“But, but, Pauline, you’re the Mayoress! And how am I going to get home?”“And you’re the Mayor dear. A small church like this only needs one of us. Our house is five minutes from this church. You could either phone a taxi or do something really daring, such as walk home. Keys.”He grumbled to himself but did as she asked.“Ah, he’s here,” Reverend Morris said. Jenna observed the approaching man carefully. Aged about sixty, overweight, and with greying hair that was dominated by a large and very obvious toupee. His gold mayoral chains glinted in the late spring sunshine.“Oh, he’s a chonky lad.” Jenna chuckled.“From what I’ve heard, he’s dishonest and drinks a lot.” Reverend Morris whispered. “His smile is as fake as that hairpiece he’s wearing. Norman Winstanley knows him from the Men’s Fellowship meetings, and said he’s made a fool of himself several times.”“Perfect qualities for someone working on the council then,” Jenna smirked.“By the way, I heard Norman has moved in with Gladys Wilcox and become her lodger.”“There’s something kinky going on between those two, I’m certain of it.” Jenna said.“What? As if. She’s in her eighties!” The vicar gasped.“Just because there’s snow on the roof, doesn’t mean the fire’s gone out!” Jenna replied. “Although Gladys once confessed to me that she had a bit of a fancy for Gordon. I guess Norman’s her second choice as he was willing to do whatever she asked of him.”Reverend Morris’ eyes widened. “I’m sure he only helps her with D I Y projects and her shopping.”“Well I still think there’s more to it. Mark my words. I don’t think Gladys is the prim old widow you think she is!”Reverend Morris fiddled with his surplice. “Ah, good afternoon Mayor!”“Hello there, Vicar!” He shook hands. “Oh and who is this lovely lady? Your daughter I presume?”“No, my wife, Jenna.”“Ah, my bad. Dearie me, either you’re his second wife or you’ve got a bloody good plastic surgeon! Ha ha ha!”Reverend Morris cringed. “Jenna is my second wife. Lucy and I divorced a year ago."Oh I see. Well don’t blame you there, Reverend. Wish I could do the same but She Who Must Be Obeyed won’t let me. Ha ha ha!”“Where is the Mayoress?” Jenna interrupted.“Afraid she’s, tested positive for Covid,” the Mayor lied, hoping that they hadn’t noticed his wife driving away.“Oh what a shame,” Jenna replied. “So you’re all alone? Never mind, I will be glad to show you round our beautiful church.”“Can’t stand the bloke,” Reverend Morris whispered to his wife as they entered the church. “There’s tactless and then

This week we get some creepy horror best not shown to eleven year-olds, forgetful vengeance, arguably the best known movie theme of the 80's, Chuck Norris wrestling crocodiles, and Judge Reinhold! Hee hee hee hee! . . . #TapesAndScowls, #TAS, #CapesAndScowls, #MoviePodcast, #Movies, #Movie, #Horror, #Drama, #Thriller, #Murder, #DuckPress, #InvasionUSA, #Memento, #BlackChristmas, #Christmas, #BeverlyHillsCop, #EddieMurphy, #ChristopherNolan --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/capesandscowls/support

Today on Wolves Express we hear from goalscorer Pablo Sarabia after the 1-0 win over Sheffield United which sees the Old Gold rise to 8th in the Premier League table. Gary O'Neil also provides an update on Hee-chan Hwang's fitness, whilst club legends Andy Thompson and Lee Naylor discuss the possibility of a European push. Find more of the latest club news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

AP correspondent Julie Walker reports on a death from a pet Gila monster. ((Gila is pronounced HEE'-luh))

Gary O'Neil has been speaking ahead of the trip to Spurs in the Premier League and updated the media in his pre-match press conference about the fitness of forwards Hee-chan Hwang and Matheus Cunha. Plus, we hear from young striker Nathan Fraser about adapting to life in the Wolves first team whilst Wolves Women midfielder Tammi George previews the Black Country Derby against West Brom on Sunday. Find more of the latest club news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Matt Jackson is back at Wolves as the club's new Head of Professional Football Development. We'll hear from Matt about his new role at Molineux as well as from Sporting Director Matt Hobbs. Plus, Matt Wild provides an update on Hee-chan Hwang's availability for the weekend's Premier League game with Brentford. Find more of the latest club news at www.wolves.co.uk. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hee hee Ben Shapiro dropping bars with his rap song Facts https://x.com/sfdamnpodcast/status/1753342850308452369?s=46&t=3UnVwMwN6QrQM7qJy5rbTg --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/sanfranciscodamn/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/sanfranciscodamn/support

Hop in the Lincoln Mark LT, listeners, we've got a duffel bag full of conversation about THE MULE! Join us for a long-haul chat about Clint's 2018 old-man-drug-trafficker drama about shitty fathers and late capitalism. Spoiler for what we thought of the movie: we both loved it! We talk drug war cinema, the film as a sort of GRAN TORINO REDUX, the film as Alison Eastwood's personal 15:17 TO PARIS, Sondra Locke's death just before its release, and lots more. Hee-haw, folks! (Actually I looked up a video of the sounds mules make and none of them are hee-haw.) Topics include:    

In this episode, the HEE crew frolic about in their love for Schönberg and Boublil's classic musical adaptation of Victor Hugo's novel. They compare the musical to the book and discuss the ways in which the medium of theater (and film!) allows creators to emphasize Hugo's themes in unique ways. Ian's Comprehensive List of the Best “Bring Him Home” Performances:Colm Wilkinson at the 10th Anniversary concert (my all-time favorite)Alfie Boe at the 25th anniversary concert Gary Morris on the complete symphonic recordingJohn Owen JonesFour tenors rendition featuring Wilkinson, Boe, Jones, and another tenor I don't recognizeCurrent Broadway star Ramin Karimloo, who is my second favorite performer after WilkinsonVery young Gaten Matarazzo from Stranger Things (amazing!)Join the Facebook discussion group here!Watch out for an announcement about what's coming next on the HEE podcast!

If you thought Summer of KUNT was dead, well… maybe you would be right actually. Or MAYBE you would see it as an opportunity to herald the arrival of the first ever KUNTUMN, during which returning legend Sudi Green inspires us all to get in our full woman-in-her-30s bag. Join the boys as they record from a Las Cultch Cultural Heritage Site (Matt's LA apartment) and talk the first episodes of “The Morning Show” season three. What follows is a spirited discussion on Lauren Boebert's perfectly moving hair during her game of Find the Sausage at “Beetlejuice,” what Matt and Bowen would order at any given restaurant, affirmation water bottle culture, and if comedy is “hee HEE ha-ho, ha HA hee HAY” or “ho HA HA hey-hey HEE ha hoi.” All that plus a debut of Matt's latest song “When Two Men Kiss (It Is Amazing)” and a test to see if “Reba has no top lip” is a good conversation starter. As Sudi Green may have once said to a little girl, “Diva, welcome to America, baby.” It's more of THIS every KUNTUMN. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hee hee hee hee, I'll get you my pretty!

A blue-skinned woman? A rural Appalachian library? A murderous mule? All this and more when the MBC ladies tackle the NYTs bestseller "The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek." Hee-haw, we reckon! Mean Book Club is four ladies (UCB, BuzzFeed, College Humor, Impractical Jokers) who read, discuss and whine about NYT bestselling books that have questionable literary merit. It's fun. It's cathartic. It's perfect for your commute. New podcast (almost) every Tuesday! Here's the Season 16 reading list:Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuistonThe Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele RichardsonRomantic Comedy by Curtis SittenfeldRun Rose Run by James Patterson and Dolly PartonEverything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex by David ReubenThe House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ KluneSupermarket by LogicBrooklyn by Colm ToibinSend any future book suggestions to meanbookclub@gmail.com! Follow us on the socials @meanbookclub! Rate, like, subscribe, and check out our Patreon page at patreon.com/meanbookclub to become a true patron of the mean arts. CREDITS: Hosted by Sarah Burton, Clara Morris, Johnna Scrabis, & Sabrina B. Jordan. This episode was produced and edited by Johnna Scrabis. Special thanks to FSM Team for our theme song, "Parkour Introvert" and Alexander Nakarada for "Banjo Fever," which played during the summary. You can get both here: https://www.free-stock-music.com

Lesley celebrates proactive planning and its benefits. Discover how setting and meeting early deadlines can provide peace of mind and pave the way for success. Plus, gain insights into how staying ahead of tasks can offer flexibility and reduce last-minute stress. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Learn how to overcome the perception of slow progress and celebrate unexpected breakthroughs.Discover how to integrate technology and continuous learning for optimal business growth.Understand how to commit to healthy routines even while traveling.Grasp how the value of proactive planning fosters a positive work environment.Episode References/Links:Mentions, Christine Ashton, an agency memberMentions, Kelly Nyhan, an agency and eLevate memberPocketSuite AppProfitable Pilates by Lesley Logan Website If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Get your 15% discount for Toe Sox – use coupon code LESLEY15Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship Join us at Agency Mini - Sept. 10-16, 2023Join us at our Cambodia Retreat - Oct. 8-13, 2023FREE Ditching Busy WebinarAmy Ledin - Episode 5: "How to take fast action against limiting beliefs" ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Lesley Logan 0:05  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:47  Happy Fuck Yeah Friday. Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast. This is where we share your wins. And then I share some mine and all this is to inspire us weekly, at least something daily for you all to celebrate what is going well what is happening that you are so proud of. And I think sometimes we think the wins have to be really big. I know a lot of people won't celebrate a win until it's like the full project is completed. But you should actually celebrate the milestones along the way. So we'll start with a win of someone else's. And then I'll share one of mine. So Christine Ashton, who we just got to see in California while on tour, she's a beautiful lavender farm. She wrote, hey, FYF, I've got a temporary client for the month who saw my flyer at the grocery store, where I thought I was hearing crickets, and just had a phone consult. I had a new client book a beginner's package after seeing my ad in our local private community newspaper. I love this one. Because it's so funny, like how we can just think like, nothing is working, nothing is working. And then like, boom, in one day, you have two people who have finally seen what you've been put out in the world. And so congratulations, Christine, I hope you had an amazing time with that client who was in town for the month, and the new client from the newspaper. I have one more one I want to share with you. And that is from Kelly Nyhan. She is In eLevate, an agency. And so we've got kind of a double dose win here. She said I received a compliment in my pocket suite app from one of my clients. It said, "Thanks for the great session today. I love all the new things you're teaching me, you're the best. Tell your teacher that I said so." Hee, I mentioned how I was learning so much in my eLevate mentorship program, then she also added, "I challenged myself to use my new equipment with my clients this week, she has a new pedal Contrology mat, Contrology springs, my clients are loving it, the mat definitely help my clients when they connect, it's especially the roll up." Well, I love that. So she pocket suite is there's a version of the tool that Profitable Pilates has joined with. And we have coaching videos that go along with all the features. And we have waivers and liability forms and all this stuff. And so it can be hard to like, just try new technology in your business. And also, it can be really difficult to get your clients to try it out. And the only issue been doing it and she's been so dedicated this whole year doing it, somebody sent like a little testimonial and love note in there. And as far as like eLevate program goes, I love that, like I love seeing our members in there, apply what they're learning with their clients and bring them along the journey. Because it allows clients know we're always learning. We're always learning. So thank you, Kelly, for sharing that. Okay, so here's the win. We're home, we wrapped up the West Coast tour, we had a great time, we got to work out along the way, which that's a win, right there is just that we planned so well that we could have time every single day to hit a jam, head a dog park, and also eat the things we wanted to eat. I got we had a whole foods within every single place, I got to get some pair foods that made it really great. And I call this a win. Because sometimes we have an air quotes vacation and we get out of routine, it can be really difficult to keep the things up to make you feel really good. But we managed to make that happen, which means it's going to happen this winter, because we figured out a way to make it work. And I'm just so grateful. Another one we have is that we are over a month ahead in a new project that we're working on. And it's just so nice that it's nice to see the things come to fruition when you plan ahead early and you actually stick to the schedule because sometimes you can procrastinate like I have I've time to do this because I'm already just doing it early to get ahead. It's like actually, no, this is a deadline, and we're going to meet that deadline, even though it is gonna be a month early because we're trying to give ourselves space and grace when things come up and not be rushed all the time. So win for me, win for the team, I'm really excited about that. Every single Friday we do this. So make sure you send your wins in. You can actually if you get the podcast newsletter, you can actually send them into there. I'll share them here. And also just take a moment to just write in your own notes on your phone like what's the win you're celebrating this week. And if you do that every day, it's even better but let's just start with one week, one day at a time and see how it goes because when you celebrate your wins, you realize just how far you're coming along. And you get to listen back and go, Oh my God, I did do that. That's what I did. That's amazing. I actually listened to this podcast when it comes out. And I get to vote I'm reminding myself of when I had it makes me just go Oh, yeah, I'm slight I'm just saying when I give myself credit for. So I hope this podcast has also helps you do that. Have an amazing day.Lesley Logan 5:24  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. Brad Crowell 5:55  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Leslie Logan and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 6:00  It is produced, edited by the Epic team at Disenyo.Brad Crowell 6:03  Theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music, and our branding by designer and artist Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 6:10  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals and Ximena Velazquez for our transcriptions.Brad Crowell 6:16  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all the content to our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Our guest today is Chief Operating Officer for Fibernetics, Hee Kim. Hee is a versatile and creative operational mastermind, leading all business and operational functions for Fibernetics, a globally recognized Canadian telecom company that has been providing innovative products and services for over 20 years. He regularly works in close partnership with the other leaders, […] The post Ep. 277 – COO, Fibernetics, Hee Kim appeared first on COO Alliance.

Our guest today is Chief Operating Officer for Fibernetics, Hee Kim. Hee is a versatile and creative operational mastermind, leading all business and operational functions for Fibernetics, a globally recognized Canadian telecom company that has been providing innovative products and services for over 20 years. He regularly works in close partnership with the other leaders, […]