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Coming up on this episode for Flirtations, we welcome Natalie Lue, the host of the Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast and the author of five books, including The Joy of Saying No, to have a conversation with us about people pleasing! Natalie is a leading voice on boundaries and people-pleasing, helping people understand how their emotional baggage interferes with their ability to live authentically. Together, we'll delve into what people-pleasing truly is and explore the five distinct styles of people pleasing Natalie identifies: gooding, efforting, avoiding, saving, and suffering. We'll discuss how people-pleasing often originates from childhood experiences and how it manifests in our adult relationships, particularly in dating. Natalie will shed light on why people-pleasing can be a significant barrier to genuine intimacy and the importance of embracing conflict as a natural and sometimes necessary part of healthy relationships. We'll also examine societal norms, the ways we're socialized, and how the era of obedience have influenced our tendencies to people-please, and why understanding and respecting differences—rather than merely mirroring others—is crucial for authentic connections. Finally, we'll explore the vital role of boundaries in breaking free from people-pleasing patterns and how to recognize and change these behaviors to foster more fulfilling relationships. So, if you're ready to change your people pleasing habits and create more fulfilling relationships, this episode is for you! Let's do this Flirties, and meet Natalie! Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy- all over the world! Enjoying the show and want to support my work? Buy the Flirt Coach a coffee! About our guest: Natalie Lue, 47, is a writer, artist, podcaster, and author of five books, including Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl and her most recent, The Joy of Saying No. She helps people pleasers, perfectionists and relationship strugglers reclaim themselves from their emotional baggage so that they can become more of who they really are and enjoy more fulfilling relationships relationships, careers, and experiences. Her key topics include boundaries, emotional unavailability, and how to foster increased emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual well-being by breaking harmful and unhelpful patterns. Natalie's work has been featured in various media, including The New York Times, ITV's Lorraine, NPR, BBC, Washington Post, Stylist, and USA Today. You can connect with Natalie on Instagram, learn more about the Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast and blog, and check out her books and work on her website. About your host: Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy - with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun! As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the Flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage. Ultimately, this practice of connection helps flirters and daters alike create stronger relationships, transcend limiting beliefs, and develop an unwavering love for the self. His work has been featured in Fortune, NBC News, The Huffington Post, and Yoga Journal. You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
Negotiate Anything: Negotiation | Persuasion | Influence | Sales | Leadership | Conflict Management
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company In this enlightening episode of the Negotiate Anything podcast, host Kwame Christian sits down with self-esteem and relationship expert Natalie Lue. Natalie shares her personal journey of transformation from a chronic people pleaser to a boundary-setting advocate. This conversation dives deep into the intricacies of people pleasing, highlighting how it serves as a barrier to authentic relationships and self-worth. Listeners will gain valuable insights into identifying their own people-pleasing behaviors and the empowering life changes that can result from setting boundaries effectively. In this episode, we cover: How to identify people-pleasing tendencies and their subtle manifestations in daily interactions. The empowering nature of overcoming people pleasing and its positive impact on relationships. A simple technique for distinguishing between actions driven by desire versus obligation. Follow Natalie on LinkedIn Contact ANI Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn The Ultimate Negotiation Guide Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race! Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company In this enlightening episode of the Negotiate Anything podcast, host Kwame Christian sits down with self-esteem and relationship expert Natalie Lue. Natalie shares her personal journey of transformation from a chronic people pleaser to a boundary-setting advocate. This conversation dives deep into the intricacies of people pleasing, highlighting how it serves as a barrier to authentic relationships and self-worth. Listeners will gain valuable insights into identifying their own people-pleasing behaviors and the empowering life changes that can result from setting boundaries effectively. In this episode, we cover: How to identify people-pleasing tendencies and their subtle manifestations in daily interactions. The empowering nature of overcoming people pleasing and its positive impact on relationships. A simple technique for distinguishing between actions driven by desire versus obligation. Follow Natalie on LinkedIn Contact ANI Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn The Ultimate Negotiation Guide Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race! Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!
In this episode we are diving deep into a topic that so many of us can relate to: breaking free from unavailable people, letting go of people pleasing, and embracing the joy of saying no.And who better to explore this with than the incredible Natalie Lue. If you've ever found yourself stuck in toxic relationship patterns, bending over backward to please others, or struggling to set boundaries, this episode is for you. Natalie is the author of Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl, a book that completely changed the way I see relationships and emotional availability. It was actually one of the first books that got me investigating why we're drawn to emotionally unavailable people and why we stay, even when we know it's not serving us.In this episode, we unpack why we get caught in these cycles, how to recognise when someone is emotionally unavailable, and most importantly, how to break free. So, if you've ever felt like you're always the one giving, waiting, or hoping for change, this is your sign to step into your power. You can find Natalie here: Instagram: @natlue Website:www.baggagereclaim.comSupport the show
Do your relationships tend to develop at a romantic comedy pace, only to get messy fast and fall apart dramatically? If you've struggled to find sustainable, lasting love, then this episode is for you. Learn about common pacing pitfalls that prevent couples from building stable partnerships, including red flags such as love bombing, how pacing can help you work skillfully with the “addiction” of love, and what to do when your pacing doesn't match your partner's.Key Takeaways00:00 - Intro02:38 - What is pacing in dating? And why should we care?19:23 - How can we pace the development of a new relationship for long-term success?36:43 - What are signs that pacing is off in a new relationship?50:11 - What if your pacing doesn't match your partner's pacing?Resources and linksFor full show notes with links, visit relationshipcenter.com/podcastEp. 1 - You Aren't Crazy, Dating is Hard (Especially for Anxious Folx)Ep. 2 - What to look for in a long-term partnerEight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John Gottman Ph.D., Julie Schwartz Gottman Ph.D., Doug Abrams, and Rachel Carlton Abrams M.D.Natalie Lue's blog Baggage Reclaim
What if you could finally stop contorting yourself to please others and start living authentically on your own terms? In this honest episode, Natalie Lue, author of "The Joy of Saying No," opens up about her pivotal shift from people-pleasing into embodying her truest self.Natalie vulnerably shares the health crisis that made her realize she was suppressing herself to become "whatever anybody wanted." Discover her strategies for separating genuine desires from ingrained obligations. Learn empowering ways to shed the cultural conditioning disconnecting you from needs and boundaries.Unpack the subtle tendencies keeping you small, so you can courageously embrace the self you've been denying. If you crave more joy and fulfillment through radical self-honor, prioritize this dialogue.You can find Natalie at: Website | Instagram | The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast | Episode TranscriptIf you LOVED this episode you'll also love the conversations we had with Susan Piver about the Enneagram and how it helps us relate to others and also set boundaries.Check out our offerings & partners: Join My New Writing Project: Awake at the WheelVisit Our Sponsor Page For Great Resources & Discount Codes Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
This week, I welcome Natalie Lue to the Smart Dating Academy podcast. She is a boundaries and relationship coach and the creator of one of the longest running self-help blogs in the world, BaggageReclaim.com. Natalie helps people understand how their emotional baggage is interfering with their ability to live their lives happily and authentically. We talk about: The impact emotional baggage has on relationships The connection between emotional availability and people-pleasing behavior The significance of boundaries in personal growth and relationship dynamics Learning to say no and setting healthy boundaries Recognizing and addressing emotional baggage to avoid repeating negative patterns in relationships Prioritizing self-respect, self-acceptance, and making decisions that align with one's true self to foster healthy and fulfilling relationships This episode is a must listen if you would like to establish healthy boundaries and cultivate meaningful and genuine connections in romantic relationships AND personal relationships.Blog: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk Website: www.natalielue.com For more free tips and up to date information, click here to register for the Smart Dating Academy free newsletter! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/smartdatingacademy/
This is an episode we all needed today.Let's talk people pleasing with Natalie Lue - how to identify if you are one, how to stop, and how to ensure you don't pass that trait onto your kids.You can buy Natalie's 'The Joy of Saying No' here. Natalie also recommended 'Adult Children of Emotional Immature Parents' by Lindsay C Gibson.Listen by clicking ‘Play', subscribe or follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and Acast, and please do rate and review to help others find the podcast.Find a new episode every Tuesday & Friday and in the meantime check out Made By Mammas on Instagram: @madebymammas.Made By Mammas®, this has been an Insanity Studios production. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Natalie Lue is a writer, podcaster, and artist. She helps people pleasers, perfectionists and relationship strugglers overcome their emotional baggage so that they can become more of who they really are.We discuss:-The signs that you're a people pleaser-How to tune into what it is that you want and need -Her top advice on how to say no Check out all of my free resources and paid offers at www.calmer-you.com/shop - and use the code PODCAST15 to save 15% on everything in the shop. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
How can we quit the toxic habit of people pleasing that erodes our mental health, sense of self, relationships and creativity?When we find we're suppressing ourselves in order to be liked or to avoid conflict, criticism, rejection, disappointment, loss or abandonment, we're people pleasing. It doesn't have to be this way. If you want to do things differently listen to this episode with my guest Natalie Lue author of The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want Natalie Lue shows us how to reclaim our boundaries and say yes to the life we want. You can find out more about Natalie's work on www.natalielue.comAnd follow her on Instagram @natlueJoin Lou on LinkedinFollow her @brave_newgirl on Instagram Music by Melody LoopSupport the showLou is the founder of Brave New Girl Media, helping put your expertise, vision & mission in the spotlight by helping you launch and grow your podcast. https://bravenewgirlmedia.comPODCASTING SERVICES:Podcast production serviceCOURSES:Podcast planning workbookPodcast Guesting courseBOOK A CALL:Get in contact to book a 30 minute discovery call with Lou.Books by Lou Hamilton: Dare to Share- bestselling guide to podcast guesting FEAR LESS- coaching guide to living more bravely Brave New Girl- How to be Fearless
Ever wondered why some relationships flourish while others falter? Writer Natalie Lue shares how vulnerability and establishing healthy boundaries lets us make deeper connections. Natalie challenges us to reflect on the unspoken dynamics shaping our relationships. Are we fostering authentic bonds, or are we unknowingly trapped in the cycle of people-pleasing? Natalie's encourages us on a journey of self-discovery, towards authenticity and finding OUR way, beyond the expectations or demands of others. Listen for an inspiring episode on creating more fulfilling relationships, including the one you have with yourself! To connect with Natalie Lue go to: Listen to this next: Episode 255: But What Will People Think? JOIN THE FGN Community: www.feelgoodnakd.com Podcast Mentorship : chardetryel.com Host Instagram: @itschardet
Do you have any anxious and/or avoidant attachment style? Lessons in Love brings you Carly Ann's and other people's inspiring stories to support you on your own journey of healing and change. If you are doing the inner work on healing the past and becoming more secure, you are in the right place.You are invited in to a VERY special episode of Lessons in Love. If you are in the trap of repeating unhealthy patterns in your life & love life, attracting people who do not or cannot commit then this is the place for you! (in fact, the whole podcast is - hit subscribe!)Just a few of the topics covered are:- The problem with playing the 'nice' girl- Unlearning unhealthy patterns so that you can experience healthy relationships- What happens to emotional baggage when you get into a relationship- Have the movies warped our view of love?Follow Carly Ann on Instagram: @carly.ann_ or go to www.carly-ann.co.ukAudio production by Bethany Donkin.Music by AtchSubscribe now and join our thriving community of listeners who are on a journey to better relationships, improved self-esteem, and a more fulfilling life. Subscribe now and join our thriving community of listeners who are on a journey to better relationships, improved self-esteem, and a more fulfilling life. Links: The Self Soothing Series with The Attachment Recovery Gym: https://carly-ann.mykajabi.com/attachment-recovery-gym Becoming Secure (& MORE!): https://carly-ann.mykajabi.com/becoming-secure-course FREE WORKSHOP, Overcoming Insecure Attachment: https://carly-ann.mykajabi.com/6-skills-to-becoming-secure Follow Carly Ann on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carly.ann_
Negotiate Anything: Negotiation | Persuasion | Influence | Sales | Leadership | Conflict Management
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/services/workshops/ In this episode, Natalie Lue, Relationship Expert, Author, Speaker and Podcaster, discusses how to know your people pleasing, how empowering it can be to overcome it, and some strategies to overcome it. Follow Natalie on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/natalie-lue-125547174/ Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/services/workshops/ Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kwamechristian/ The Ultimate Negotiation Guide: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/guides/ultimate-negotiation-guide/ Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race!: https://www.amazon.com/Have-Difficult-Conversations-About-Race/dp/1637741308/ref=pd_%5B%E2%80%A6%5Df0bc9774-7975-448b-bde1-094cab455adb&pd_rd_i=1637741308&psc=1 Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!: https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Confidence-Conflict-Negotiate-Anything/dp/0578413736/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2PSW69L6ABTK&keywords=finding+confidence+in+conflict&qid=1667317257&qu=eyJxc2MiOiIwLjQyIiwicXNhIjoiMC4xNCIsInFzcCI6IjAuMjMifQ%3D%3D&sprefix=finding+confidence+in+conflic%2Caps%2C69&sr=8-1
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/services/workshops/ In this episode, Natalie Lue, Relationship Expert, Author, Speaker and Podcaster, discusses how to know your people pleasing, how empowering it can be to overcome it, and some strategies to overcome it. Follow Natalie on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/natalie-lue-125547174/ Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/services/workshops/ Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kwamechristian/ The Ultimate Negotiation Guide: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/guides/ultimate-negotiation-guide/ Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race!: https://www.amazon.com/Have-Difficult-Conversations-About-Race/dp/1637741308/ref=pd_%5B%E2%80%A6%5Df0bc9774-7975-448b-bde1-094cab455adb&pd_rd_i=1637741308&psc=1 Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!: https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Confidence-Conflict-Negotiate-Anything/dp/0578413736/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2PSW69L6ABTK&keywords=finding+confidence+in+conflict&qid=1667317257&qu=eyJxc2MiOiIwLjQyIiwicXNhIjoiMC4xNCIsInFzcCI6IjAuMjMifQ%3D%3D&sprefix=finding+confidence+in+conflic%2Caps%2C69&sr=8-1
On this episode of The Dude Therapist, Eli Weinstein interviews Natalie Lue, a boundaries and relationship coach, author, and creator of one of the longest-running self-help blogs in the world, Baggage Reclaim. They discuss the concept of people pleasing, how to validate a child's feelings, the evolution of parenting, and the importance of learning to say no with confidence. Tune in to gain insight on how to become aware of the roles you play in your relationships! [00:00:06] Joy of saying no: Boundaries, Respect, Self-Love [00:05:04] Socialized into people people-pleasing role. [00:09:17] Empowering children to choose their own identity. [00:13:44] Dialogue, not dictation: 6 words [00:19:54] People please to please others. [00:25:47] People pleasing: suffering, pleasing, avoiding, efforting. [00:31:43] Combat people pleasing: Observe, notice, choose, why. [00:37:16] People-pleasing has a hidden agenda. [00:43:15] Express boundaries authentically. [00:49:27] Dealing with people who don't respect boundaries. Natalie Lue is a boundaries and relationship coach who‘s the creator of one of the longest-running self-help blogs in the world, Baggage Reclaim, and The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. The England-born, Ireland-raised author helps people understand how their emotional baggage is interfering with their ability to live their lives happily and authentically. Topics she's particularly well-known for include emotional unavailability, recognising shady behaviour, people pleasing, and values, needs and boundaries. Natalie's authored five books, including Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl and The Joy of Saying No, the paperback of which just came out in the U.S. Her advice has been featured in the New York Times, Forbes, NPR, USA Today, and the BBC, among many others. Natalie lives in Caterham, Surrey, on the edge of south London with her husband, two teenage daughters, and cockapoo. Instagram @natlue Substack: natalielue.substack.com Website: www.baggagereclaim.com --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thedudetherapist/support
Topics covered : Gut instinct, emotional unavailability, people pleasing, boundaries, toxic relationships, fear, conditioning, perimenopause, health concerns, parenting, breaking the cycle of dysfunction.In this episode I speak to author and relationship expert, Natalie Lue.She lives in Surrey with her husband Emmon and teenage daughters, Saria (16) and Nia (14) and I've been a fan of her work for many years now.When she was 10 she came to live in Ireland and when she was 23 she moved to London to go to University and she has lived there since.We sat down in the summer, and she spoke about her upbringing and breaking up with her mother, yes you heard that right! And she also spoke about her book ‘ The Joy of Saying No' which is a fantastic read. And I started the conversation by asking her about her brilliant blog ‘Baggage reclaim' which covers topics like emotional unavailability, people pleasing and boundaries.Her book : ‘The Joy Of Saying No'If you're a fan of my pod, please follow, rate and review in all the usual places.And thanks, as always, for your support of Ready to be Real. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this special episode, I'm honored to welcome Natalie Lue, someone who has profoundly influenced the lives of countless individuals, including myself. Natalie Lue, a beacon of inspiration, joins us today. As a podcaster, speaker, artist, and renowned author, her remarkable works, particularly "Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl," have left an indelible mark. Natalie's narrative is a testament to the transformative power of self-discovery.Natalie's story is a tale of metamorphosis. In 2005, a debilitating illness and a tumultuous breakup with an emotionally distant partner ignited a spark of self-realization. Her experiences became the cornerstone for her incredible journey, which encompasses five best-selling books, the creation of Baggage Reclaim, an archive of over 16,000 enlightening blog entries, and a podcast that has touched the lives of millions of women across 140 countries. Her unwavering mission is to help others overcome abandonment, rejection, trauma, and the damaging effects of people-pleasing, emotional unavailability, and feelings of inadequacy.Natalie Lue's impact extends far and wide. Her candid, compassionate, and humor-infused approach to relationships has gained her a global following. She's been recognized by esteemed outlets like The New York Times, NPR, and the BBC. Her books, including "Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl," "The No Contact Rule," "The Dreamer and Fantasy Relationship," and "Love, Care, Trust & Respect," with over 140,000 copies sold, have been pivotal in reshaping perspectives. Her podcast, "The Baggage Reclaim Sessions," has surpassed 2 million downloads. Furthermore, Harper Horizon published her latest book, "The Joy of Saying No," in October 2022.Natalie's expertise is not confined to the world of self-help and relationships. She's also the founder of the kids' lifestyle blog, Bambino Goodies. For the past 13.5 years, she has dedicated herself to full-time blogging, leaving behind a career in advertising. Natalie has shared her insights on relationships at numerous conferences worldwide, and her current focus encompasses subjects like people-pleasing, boundaries, mindfulness, and creativity.Kerry Brett and Natalie Lue dive into a rich and enlightening conversation. Natalie's remarkable ability to unravel complex relationship dynamics and her skillful articulation in "Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl" are highlighted. If you've ever grappled with feelings of unworthiness or questioned your value in the world of dating, this episode is a game-changer.Natalie's unparalleled ability to identify and address relationship issues with unfiltered candor.Unpacking the enigma of "Mr. Unavailable" and the emotional turmoil it entails.The enduring impact of the book "Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl."How Natalie's work resonates with women worldwide, illuminating shared pains.The societal conditioning that often leaves women with the short end of the stick in toxic relationships.The imperative of never settling in matters of the heart.A sobering glimpse into relationships with "Mr. Unavailable."The importance of recognizing and navigating "Future Faking."The phenomenon of "Fast Forwarding" and its fleeting intensity.Connect with Natalie:Stay connected with Natalie Lue on Instagram @natlue or visit her website at natalielue.com. You can find all her empowering books on Amazon and access her podcast, "The Baggage Reclaim Sessions," on all major podcast platforms.
¿Qué hay para mi dentro del libro de lecturas recomendadas del programa conocimiento experto El Placer de Decir No de Natalie Lue? Deja de complacer a la gente y empieza a vivir la vida que quieres, aumentando mi autoestima y seguridad. Adquiere el Libro: https://amzn.to/3PDe1CM Curso - Taller La Estrategia Maestra:https://pay.hotmart.com/E86692728N?checkoutMode=10&bid=1695236708107 Conviértete en miembro de este canal para disfrutar de ventajas: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC80Q7vyU9ZMfePxogSdb8kA/join Forma Parte de Revolución 180: https://conocimientoexperto.com/ols/products/diariorevolucion180 Hazte de mi libro: https://amzn.to/3gCY1mO Mis programas: * Revolución 180: https://impactoexperto.com/diariorev180 * Libro Mentalidad con Proposito: https://amzn.to/2KmHMXa * Podcast Conocimiento Experto: https://open.spotify.com/show/65J8RTsruRXBxeQElVmU0b?si=9f444953f34246ab * Boletin Oficial: https://conocimientoexperto.com/ Mis redes: * Sígueme En Instagram en: https://www.instagram.com/salvadormingo/ * Sígueme en Facebook en: https://www.facebook.com/salvadormingooficial * Sígueme en Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/SalvadorMingoConocimientoExperto * Sígueme en Twitter en: https://twitter.com/s_mingo La autora Natalie Lue sólo tenía 28 años cuando recibió la noticia, tras 18 meses de ir de médico en médico, de departamento en departamento, de prueba en prueba. Nadie podía decirle cuál era la causa de su enfermedad inmunológica -la sarcoidosis- ni ofrecerle un camino convincente para curarla. Al mismo tiempo, se había guardado la enfermedad para sí misma, sin querer "agobiar" a su familia, jefe y compañeros con información inconveniente. Durante esos 18 meses, Lue había seguido al pie de la letra todas las sugerencias. Al fin y al cabo, había que obedecer a los expertos y a las figuras de autoridad sin rechistar, ¿no? Pero en agosto de 2005, su cuerpo y su alma le dijeron lo contrario. Totalmente contraria a su carácter, Lue se encontró diciendo no a su último asesor y a sus recomendaciones. Fue un momento crucial, que marcó el inicio del viaje de Lue hacia la recuperación de la sarcoidosis y de otra aflicción más discreta: agradar a la gente. Puede que usted no se considere necesariamente una persona complaciente. Pero tal vez pueda identificarse con años de reprimir sus propios deseos y necesidades por "el bien" de los demás, o de hacer caso sin pensar de la "sabiduría" de los demás mientras ignora la suya propia, y de decir sí cuando realmente, realmente, realmente quiere decir no. Si es así, lo más probable es que sufras de complacencia generalizada. Pero, como veremos, no es culpa tuya y hay una salida. La idea de decir que no o de establecer límites saludables puede parecerte aterradora ahora, y puede que no tengas ni la más mínima idea de quién serías sin tus tendencias subyacentes de agradar a la gente. Pero al otro lado de esos límites saludables está tu libertad; quien eres sin esos hábitos arraigados es tu auténtico yo. Así que si estás harto de contorsionarte en cualquier pretzel humano que se espere de ti -posponiendo tus sueños y sacrificando tu alegría y autenticidad- abróchate el cinturón. Prepárate para un curso intensivo para dejar de lado para siempre tus hábitos de complacer a la gente. Edicion Enero 2023 Natalie Lue es una autora y artista nacida en el Reino Unido y criada en Irlanda, conocida sobre todo por su blog Baggage Reclaim. Antes de The Joy of Saying No, Lue autopublicó cuatro libros, entre ellos Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl y The No Contact Rule. Su trabajo sobre el equipaje emocional ha aparecido en Forbes, el New York Times y el Washington Post. Enfoque Aumentando Mi Autoestima e Inteligencia Emocional Se Firme Salvador Mingo Conocimiento Experto #desarrollopersonal #saludmental #mentalidad
¿Qué hay para mi dentro del libro de lecturas recomendadas del programa conocimiento experto El Placer de Decir No de Natalie Lue? Deja de complacer a la gente y empieza a vivir la vida que quieres, aumentando mi autoestima y seguridad. Adquiere el Libro: https://amzn.to/3PDe1CM Curso - Taller La Estrategia Maestra:https://pay.hotmart.com/E86692728N?checkoutMode=10&bid=1695236708107 Conviértete en miembro de este canal para disfrutar de ventajas: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC80Q7vyU9ZMfePxogSdb8kA/join Forma Parte de Revolución 180: https://conocimientoexperto.com/ols/products/diariorevolucion180 Hazte de mi libro: https://amzn.to/3gCY1mO Mis programas: * Revolución 180: https://impactoexperto.com/diariorev180 * Libro Mentalidad con Proposito: https://amzn.to/2KmHMXa * Podcast Conocimiento Experto: https://open.spotify.com/show/65J8RTsruRXBxeQElVmU0b?si=9f444953f34246ab * Boletin Oficial: https://conocimientoexperto.com/ Mis redes: * Sígueme En Instagram en: https://www.instagram.com/salvadormingo/ * Sígueme en Facebook en: https://www.facebook.com/salvadormingooficial * Sígueme en Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/SalvadorMingoConocimientoExperto * Sígueme en Twitter en: https://twitter.com/s_mingo La autora Natalie Lue sólo tenía 28 años cuando recibió la noticia, tras 18 meses de ir de médico en médico, de departamento en departamento, de prueba en prueba. Nadie podía decirle cuál era la causa de su enfermedad inmunológica -la sarcoidosis- ni ofrecerle un camino convincente para curarla. Al mismo tiempo, se había guardado la enfermedad para sí misma, sin querer "agobiar" a su familia, jefe y compañeros con información inconveniente. Durante esos 18 meses, Lue había seguido al pie de la letra todas las sugerencias. Al fin y al cabo, había que obedecer a los expertos y a las figuras de autoridad sin rechistar, ¿no? Pero en agosto de 2005, su cuerpo y su alma le dijeron lo contrario. Totalmente contraria a su carácter, Lue se encontró diciendo no a su último asesor y a sus recomendaciones. Fue un momento crucial, que marcó el inicio del viaje de Lue hacia la recuperación de la sarcoidosis y de otra aflicción más discreta: agradar a la gente. Puede que usted no se considere necesariamente una persona complaciente. Pero tal vez pueda identificarse con años de reprimir sus propios deseos y necesidades por "el bien" de los demás, o de hacer caso sin pensar de la "sabiduría" de los demás mientras ignora la suya propia, y de decir sí cuando realmente, realmente, realmente quiere decir no. Si es así, lo más probable es que sufras de complacencia generalizada. Pero, como veremos, no es culpa tuya y hay una salida. La idea de decir que no o de establecer límites saludables puede parecerte aterradora ahora, y puede que no tengas ni la más mínima idea de quién serías sin tus tendencias subyacentes de agradar a la gente. Pero al otro lado de esos límites saludables está tu libertad; quien eres sin esos hábitos arraigados es tu auténtico yo. Así que si estás harto de contorsionarte en cualquier pretzel humano que se espere de ti -posponiendo tus sueños y sacrificando tu alegría y autenticidad- abróchate el cinturón. Prepárate para un curso intensivo para dejar de lado para siempre tus hábitos de complacer a la gente. Edicion Enero 2023 Natalie Lue es una autora y artista nacida en el Reino Unido y criada en Irlanda, conocida sobre todo por su blog Baggage Reclaim. Antes de The Joy of Saying No, Lue autopublicó cuatro libros, entre ellos Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl y The No Contact Rule. Su trabajo sobre el equipaje emocional ha aparecido en Forbes, el New York Times y el Washington Post. Enfoque Aumentando Mi Autoestima e Inteligencia Emocional Se Firme Salvador Mingo Conocimiento Experto #desarrollopersonal #saludmental #mentalidad
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“I see in books,” says today's guest. “Every book is, at its heart, an argument for something—for a belief, a way of life, a vision of the future, a way to solve a problem, a way to make a friend, a way to lose your soul. The point is what the entire story drives to. It's the thing your reader will come away from your book feeling.” That's just one gem from today's guest, Jennie Nash, book coach and author of a blueprint series on how to approach your writing. Jennie and I discuss the tumult happening in hybrid and traditional publishing outfits; risks inherent in the publishing process; red flags to watch out for in selecting partners; determining the right genre for your work (i.e. nonfiction, fiction, memoir), how to “make room for the reader,” and what it means to write for the marketplace. More About Jennie: Jennie Nash is the founder and CEO of Author Accelerator, a company on a mission to lead the emerging book coaching industry. Author Accelerator has certified more than 160 book coaches in both fiction and nonfiction. Jennie's own book coaching clients have landed top New York agents and six-figure book deals with Big 5 houses such as Penguin, Scribner, Simon & Schuster, and Hachette, and won dozens of national indie book awards. Jennie is the author of 12 books in 3 genres, including Blueprint for a Nonfiction Book: Plan and Pitch Your Big Idea and the forthcoming Blueprint for a Memoir: How to Write a Memoir for the Marketplace.
“Legacy isn't something you leave, it's something you live.” These are just some of the wise words from this week's guest, Mandy Lehto, who shares strategies for letting go of being a hard-o-holic, nexting, navigating mid-career pivots, and busting all manner of other “not enough” scams. More About Mandy: Mandy Lehto is a speaker, writer and coach with a Doctorate from Cambridge University and in her former career she was a director at a global investment bank. Mandy is the host of Enough, the podcast, a show for recovering perfectionists and overachievers. When Mandy isn't coaching leaders, she's parenting her two musical teenagers with her husband, or walking Herbie, her toy poodle, on Wimbledon Common.
As “recovering people pleaser” Natalie Lue opens her book, The Joy of Saying No, “Suppressing and repressing my needs, desires, expectations, feelings, and opinions to try to influence and control other people's feelings and behavior was as natural to me as breathing. I thought it was normal to tell people what they want to hear (read: lie) to make them feel better. I believed I was ticking the boxes of being a Good Person by being kind, generous, hardworking, conscientious, loving, eager to help, attractive, and intelligent, and doing what others needed and wanted.” If you, too, are ticking “Good Person” boxes while making yourself miserable, this episode is for you. Natalie and I discuss the five types of people pleasers, what we continue to struggle with today despite decades of awareness-building, and how to build the skill of saying no. This crossover episode originally aired on the Pivot podcast on July 2, 2023. More About Natalie: Natalie Lue used to have very low self-esteem, a litany of problems including bad boundaries, toxic relationships with emotionally unavailable and shady folk, and a crippling immune system disease, but this all changed in the summer of 2005. Now, she is a recovering people pleaser. She's the author of The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want and for 8 years hosted The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. Natalie helps people learn how to reclaim themselves from their emotional baggage and increase emotional availability through self-care, making a profound difference in their lives via her substack On Knowing Yourself.
Being able to say no to people can be difficult for several reasons, and it often varies from person to person, hence we spoke to The Joy of Saying No author Natalie Lue to get some advice on the "How To Be Books Podcast".Please hit subscribe to hear the whole series on life skills and social change! It should be short and sweet. I look forward to journeying with you through this maze of hacks.Other wonderful guests who took part:Amanda Craven, an accredited and licensed clinical hypnotherapist, life coach, psychologist and author based in the UK with a global client base.Dr Lisa Turner, trauma expert and founder of CETfreedom.Daniela Wolfe, founder and CEO at Best D Life – Helping You Find the Bliss in Your Busy.Dr Lienna Wilson, a clinical psychologist with a practice in Princeton New Jersey.Transformative coach Myra Mchale.Parenting teenagers expert and psychologist Angela Karanja.John Pabon, a sustainability author, consultant and speakerLaura Tremaine, who is the host of the 10 Things To Tell You podcast and author of The Life Council.Other books/articles looked at:Nedra Glover Tawwab: Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself
Blinkist Podcast - Interviews | Personal Development | Productivity | Business | Psychology
We're delighted to present a conversation with Natalie Lue, author of the wildly popular blog Baggage Reclaim (baggagereclaim.com) and five books, including the latest, "The Joy of Saying No," that will help you not only identify your people-pleasing style and habits, but also finally leave them behind. In this episode, Natalie shares her unmatched insights on the importance of boundaries and saying no, and the destructive effects a lack of them can have on your body and mind. By exploring the five different kinds of people-pleasing, we dive deeper into the "why" behind the tendency and reframe our understanding of people-pleasing altogether. A new Simplify episode brimming with actionable wisdom awaits you every fortnight throughout the summer! Get the deluxe experience of Simplify in the Blinkist app with the Guide we made to go with this episode. You'll hear even more of the conversation with Natalie Lue, get extra book recommendations, and hear more of Caitlin and Ben guiding you through tools to overcome people-pleasing. Get the Guide by going to https://www.blinkist.com/en/nc/friends [1] and entering the code pleaser. We hope you love it! Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at podcast@blinkist.com [4]. This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Phoebe McIndoe & Ben Jackson at Blinkist
From a certain outside perspective, turning down a $200,000 two-book deal from a traditional publishing house makes no sense. But for today's guest, Paul Millerd, it fits perfectly into his operating paradigm of what David Whyte calls the pathless path. After climbing the ranks in corporate consulting but feeling increasingly empty, Paul shifted away from chasing status and approval, and started his own business his own way. Now the mantra he lives (and writes) by is “coming alive over getting ahead.” In this conversation we dive into how he felt when he got the offer from the publisher, the "old Paul" resurfacing during his meetings with them, and how he has fared on his self-publishing journey in the two years that the book has been out. More About Paul: Paul Millerd is an independent writer, freelancer, coach, and digital creator. He is the author of The Pathless Path: Imagining a New Story for Work and Life, in which he explores the invisible scripts that constrain our lives. He is also the host of The Pathless Path podcast, where he talks with the most interesting people on unconventional paths.
Today we're going behind the scenes of book launching, sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly (cries) resulting from the emotional rollercoaster that often surrounds the process of setting big projects loose into the world, including exhaustion, comparison, dashed hopes, and grief.
As “recovering people pleaser” Natalie Lue opens her book, The Joy of Saying No, “Suppressing and repressing my needs, desires, expectations, feelings, and opinions to try to influence and control other people's feelings and behavior was as natural to me as breathing. I thought it was normal to tell people what they want to hear (read: lie) to make them feel better. I believed I was ticking the boxes of being a Good Person by being kind, generous, hardworking, conscientious, loving, eager to help, attractive, and intelligent, and doing what others needed and wanted.” If you, too, are ticking “Good Person” boxes while making yourself miserable, this episode is for you. Natalie and I discuss the five types of people pleasers, what we continue to struggle with today despite decades of awareness-building, and how to build the skill of saying no. More About Natalie: Natalie Lue used to have very low self-esteem, a litany of problems including bad boundaries, toxic relationships with emotionally unavailable and shady folk, and a crippling immune system disease, but this all changed in the summer of 2005. Now, she is a recovering people pleaser. She's the author of The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want and for 8 years hosted The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. Natalie helps people learn how to reclaim themselves from their emotional baggage and increase emotional availability through self-care, making a profound difference in their lives via her substack On Knowing Yourself.
Author and relationship expert Natalie Lue joins me on this episode to share exactly how to break out of the people-pleasing cycle. She highlights key takeaways from her book, The Joy of Saying No, including the five types of people-pleasers and how to understand what drives their behaviors. Natalie and I also get into the best ways to start creating and maintaining boundaries, which is something I've really been working on in this season of my business. IN THIS EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT: - Recognizing where you overextend yourself - How to get to the root cause of your anxiety - What to do if you say ‘yes' to something for the wrong reason - Examples of guardrails you can put in place to when your ego gets in the way RESOURCES - Sign up for The Spritz newsletter at litepink.com! - Text DAILY to 310-496-8363 for daily manifesting affirmations and journal prompts. CONNECT WITH NATALIE Follow Natalie: @natlue Get your copy of The Joy of Saying No: thejoyofsayingno.com Listen to The Baggage Reclaim Sessions CONNECT WITH LORI Follow me: @loriharder Follow Lite Pink: @drinklitepink Follow Earn Your Happy: @earnyourhappy Follow Girlfriends & Business: @girlfriendsandbusiness Listen to Girlfriends & Business
Join me this time as I chat to ‘recovering people pleaser' Natalie Lue - author of The Joy of Saying No, and founder of Baggage Reclaim, one of the longest-running self-help blogs in the world. Most of us (as with our own parents) will have been raised during The Age of Obedience - socialized (especially if we identify as women) to be good and compliant - little wonder then that so many of us exhibit people-pleasing behaviours. Perhaps it hasn't been a huge issue for us before, but perimenopause impacts on our ability to ‘multitask' in the way we might have managed before now and for many of us holding up our people-pleasing tendencies can become exhausting, even debilitating. Natalie talks us through the five different styles of people-pleasing: gooding, efforting, avoiding, saving, and suffering - how these tendencies might have arisen in the first place, and helps us to identify which style we most identify with. The chapters that focus on the five styles also highlight ‘things to watch out for' and some ‘quick shifts' to help the reader start changing their behaviours. The later parts of the book provide a framework for instituting healthier boundaries and troubleshooting when we might get pushback from others or indeed from ourselves! Natalie also suggests invoking ‘the power of the pause', and explains the difference between a ‘hard no' and a ‘soft no' - and when we might want to use each of them. Last of all we discuss why saying ‘No' to some things opens up space for us to say ‘Yes' to the things we truly value and find joyful. I'll leave you with this little nugget of wisdom from the book: “Every time you do something from a place of guilt, fear, or obligation, it always leads to resentment. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon.” The Joy of Saying No is out now, published by Harper Horizon, and you can find Natalie at www.baggagereclaim.com and https://www.instagram.com/natlue You can also find us over on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/middlingalong_podcast/ and you can listen to past episodes at www.middlingalong.com It would mean so much if you'd subscribe, rate, and review us to share the love and help others find the podcast too! You can also find me at https://www.instagram.com/managingthemenopause or at www.managingthemenopause.com where we offer 1-1 coaching and workplace training. Get your free 'Guide to your GP appointment' at https://www.managingthemenopause.com/free-resources
A woman who was stalked by her husband and then placed into witness protection with a new identity to escape him, says she feels like she's the one being punished. She's complained to the police about the way her case was handled after being told she failed an assessment and was no longer being supported by them in her new life. She spoke to our reporter Melanie Abbott, and says she felt completely cut adrift. We hear her story of how she had to uproot her two children and start a new life with a new job in a new town, while her husband is free to live wherever he likes. Academic Rachael Wheatley from the university of Derby tells Anita how she is training police to be better at dealing with stalkers and how victims need better support. A new report by the Trade Union Congress has highlighted a gender pension gap between what men and women are living on in retirement. The estimate it's currently running at 40.5%, which is more than double the current gender pay gap. Nuala talks to Nikki Pound from the TUC and financial expert Sarah Pennells Consumer finance specialist at Royal London - pensions insurance provider about the issues facing women and possible solutions. You can't read a tabloid newspaper without some form of cheating scandal filling the headlines. But what makes someone lie to the person they love? Nuala asks Natalie Lue, a boundaries and relationships coach about the big and little lies we tell in relationships. Writer and Podcaster Jackie Adedeji speaks to Nuala about her new Channel 4 documentary UNTOLD: My Big Boobs, a look into the impacts of having big boobs and the rise in breast reduction surgery. Sarah Ditum also joins to discuss the cultural trends of breasts through the years. Dr Edna Adan Ismail is known as the ‘Woman of Firsts'. She's Somaliland's first trained midwife, first female Minister of Foreign Affairs, and former First Lady. And now she has added another first to her title. She is this year's winner of the Templeton Prize - making her the first black African woman to receive the honour. She has been awarded the £1.1 million prize for her contribution to women's health. In 2002 she sold everything she owned to build The Edna Adan Hospital and University which has played a crucial role in cutting maternal mortality rates in Somaliland. She still lives and works within the hospital. Edna Adan Ismail explains what life is like for women in Somaliland, and what will she spend the prize money on. Presenter: Anita Rani Producer: Hanna Ward
Why do we lie? And what is happening in our brain when we do it? Nuala asks psychologist Dr Sharon Leal, Senior Research Fellow and Member of the International Centre for Research in Forensic Psychology at the University of Portsmouth and Professor Tali Sharot, director of the Affective Brain Lab. a professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London, and the author of The Optimism Bias. A 2019 study by Portsmouth University found that men were more than twice as likely to consider themselves expert liars who got away with it. But women can be just as good at lying. Nuala speaks to two women who are very good at it! Amanda Lovett, from the BAFTA award winning BBC gameshow The Traitors, won legions of fans for her steely ability to lie during the show, and Kirsty Mann is a writer and comedian - but she's been keeping a very big secret from some of her comedy pals. She has a show about having a double life is called SKELETONS and is playing at the Edinburgh Fringe. Some lies are bigger than other and can have a huge impact on your life. Nuala talks to writer Miranda Doyle about exposing her family's lies in her memoire Book of Untruths, and a listener we are calling Ravi, explains why she lied to her family about moving to the US for love. Plus, you can't read a tabloid newspaper without some form of cheating scandal filling the headlines. But what makes someone lie to the person they love? Nuala asks Natalie Lue, a boundaries and relationships coach, and author of The Joy of Saying No, and writer Rosie Green, author of How to Heal a Broken Heart and host of podcast Life's Rosie about the big and little lies we tell in relationships. Presenter: Nuala McGovern Producer: Sophie Powling
Natalie Lue (@natlue) and Hattie Crisell (@hattiehattie) are writers who have forged successful portfolio careers. We explore their adventures in journalism, blogging, podcasting and publishing. We dive into the reality of forging a portfolio career and they give us advice for how they might start today.*ABOUT NATALIE LUE Natalie Lue is behind the incredibly popular Baggage Reclaim Blog. Nat's self-published books, including Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl, The No Contact Rule and Love, Care, Trust & Respect, have sold 150K+ copies, and her podcast, The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, has over 3 million downloads. Earlier in 2023, her book The Joy of Saying No was published by Harper Horizon.*RESOURCESFollow Natalie Lue:Instagram:@natlueTwitter: @NataliemlueSubstack: On Knowing YourselfWebsite: Natalielue.comPodcast: The Baggage Reclaim SessionsLatest Book: The Joy Of Saying NoNatalie's Book Store: here*ABOUT HATTIE CRISELL Hattie Crisell is a freelance writer and journalist. In her popular podcast In Writing with Hattie Crisell, Hattie interviews writers of all kinds in their studies, and she's a contributing editor of Grazia magazine. She has written for publications including The New York Times, Style Magazine, The Cut, The Telegraph and Vogue. In 2022 she launched her Substack newsletter, In Writing and in March 2023, she announced her book deal with Granta, to be based on her podcast.*Follow Hattie Crisell:Instagram:@hattiecrisellTwitter: @hattiehattieSubstack: In WritingWebsite: hattiecrisell.comPodcast: In Writing with Hattie CrisellFor show notes, transcripts and to attend our live podcasts visit: podcast.londonwriterssalon.comFor free writing sessions, join free Writers' Hours: writershour.com*FOLLOW LONDON WRITERS' SALONTwitter: twitter.com/WritersSalonInstagram: instagram.com/londonwriterssalonFacebook: facebook.com/LondonWritersSalonIf you're enjoying this show, please rate and review this show!
Natalie Lue is a writer, speaker, podcaster, artist, and founder of one of the longest running self-help blogs in the world, Baggage Reclaim and The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. She just released a new book, The Joy of Saying No, which highlights her six-step plan to help readers find their “no” so they can create healthier boundaries and reconnect with their values and authentic self.
We're joined by Natalie Lue, boundaries expert and author of The Joy Of Saying No which is a simple plan to stop people pleasing, reclaim boundaries, and say yes to the life you want. This is SUCH a juicy episode. So often in grief, we can feel stretched thin and our relationships change, and we may not know how to set boundaries or that we even need them. In this conversation we learn ALL about pleasing people, and how to spot if you are one. Natalie also shares her personal experience with complicated grief, how grief makes us people pleasers, how to set boundaries, coping with difficult relationships, and much more. Buy Nat's book, The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People-Pleasing, Reclaim Your Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want, here. Connect with usBuy our book Good Mourning: Honest Conversations About Grief and Loss, here: linktr.ee/goodmourningpodcastCheck out our affirmation cards for grief and loss at www.goodmourning.com.auFollow us on Instagram at @goodmourningpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Are you a people pleaser? Do you find it hard to say no? Then this week's episode is for you. We talk to author Natalie Leu about the 5 types of people pleasers, how to set healthy boundaries and her new book THE JOY OF SAYING NO. Show Notes and Links: www.hotflashescooltopics.com FOLLOW US ON: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hotflashesandcooltopics/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6ssWfO0qeZYEIs6TzrKBHQ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/657557054765087 Want to Leave a Review for Hot Flashes and Cool Topics? Here's How: For Apple Podcasts on an iPhone or iOS device: Open the Apple Podcast App on your device. Click on the “search” icon Type into the search bar “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” and click on the show Towards the bottom, look for “Ratings and Reviews” Click on “Write a Review” and leave us your thoughts and comments! For Apple Podcasts on a computer: On the Apple Podcasts website, go to the search bar and type “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” After clicking on the show, find the “Listen on Apple Podcasts” button and click on it The “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” podcast should open on the Apple Podcasts application Keep scrolling on the page until you see “Ratings and Reviews” Click on “See All” If you want to give us a five-star rating, hover over the empty stars! If you want to leave your thoughts and comments, click on “Write a Review”!
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We will learn: The difference between wanting to do things for others and people-pleasing. The 5 types of people pleasing and how to identify which type you fall into. 6 steps for finding joy in saying no. We all have a desire for approval and validation. We all want to fit in and belong, but the problem is, if we're so focused on pleasing other people, we can lose touch with ourselves. So, as always, the first step is awareness. How do we identify our people-pleasing behaviors so we can start living from the inside out, instead of the other way around? That's what we're talking about today. Our guest is Natalie Lue. She is a writer, speaker, podcaster, artist, and founder of one of the longest-running self-help blogs in the world, Baggage Reclaim (www.baggagereclaim.com), and The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. She helps people understand how their emotional baggage is interfering with their ability to live their lives happily and authentically. She's also the author of “The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want.” Links from the episode: Show Notes: https://mindlove.com/289 Become a Mind Love Member for high-value Masterclasses, Growth Workbooks, Monthly Meditations, and Uninterrupted Listening FREE 5-Days to Purpose Email Course Sign up for The Morning Mind Love for short daily notes to wake up inspired Support Mind Love Sponsors Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Hey team, this week I'm talking with Natalie Lue about her book, The Joy of Saying No. Natalie is the author of the popular relationship and self-esteem blog Baggage Reclaim, as well as the host of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast.With ADHD, we can often end up as people-pleasers, always putting other people's needs above our own. And while being helpful is a great trait, we also need to make sure that we're taking time for ourselves as well.In our conversation today, Natalie and I discuss how to get out of people pleasing and work on setting up boundaries to help keep us on track with what we really want to be doing.Support me on PatreonFeel free to ask me a question on my Contact PageFind the full show note at HackingYourADHD.com/136This Episode's Top TipsPeople pleasing is about suppressing one's needs, desires, expectations, feelings, and opinions to prioritize others' needs and avoid negative consequences.By people pleasing, we create unspoken contracts, and this can lead to frustration when the other party does not fulfill their end. We are often dropping hints instead of being direct about our needs because of our fear of rejection or negative consequences.While it can be hard to say no, it is vital that we are using our no to help us set boundaries that will help us curtail our people-pleasing and allow to prioritize our own well-being.
Natalie Lue, author of The Joy Of Saying No, joins me as we dive into the trait of people pleasing. But isn't looking out for others and what they want a good thing? Not always. In fact, it can be downright destructive. Learn more about Natalie here - https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/ On the Extended Version ... Natalie and I continue the conversation, only a little more personally. Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... Hello Fresh: Take the stress out of meal time at your house, visit https://hellofresh.com/passion65 use our code passion65 and get 65% off + free shipping. The post People Pleasers | Natalie Lue #612 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.
Natalie Lue, author of The Joy Of Saying No, joins me as we dive into the trait of people pleasing. But isn't looking out for others and what they want a good thing? Not always. In fact, it can be downright destructive. Learn more about Natalie here - https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/ On the Extended Version ... Natalie and I continue the conversation, only a little more personally. Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... Hello Fresh: Take the stress out of meal time at your house, visit https://hellofresh.com/passion65 use our code passion65 and get 65% off + free shipping.
In this episode we're talking about people pleasing - becoming aware of WHEN and HOW you're doing it, WHY you people please and how to set boundaries you can stick to - by finding The Joy Of Saying No. Natalie's new book - The Joy Of Saying No Find Natalie on Instagram Substack Website
In this week's episode, Chad and Kelley talk to Natalie Lue, the author of The Joy of Saying No. Natalie is a writer, speaker, podcaster, artist and founder of the longest running self-help blogs in the world, the Baggage Reclaim and the Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast. Her mission is to help people understand how their emotional baggage is interfering with their ability to live their happiest life and live authentically. Her advice has been featured in the New York Times, Forbes, NPR, USA Today, and the BBC, among many others. In today's episode we speak with Natalie about why we people please and how it's not really about other people but rather a way to control how we're perceived, how our childhood shapes our understanding of how we should live up to other people's expectations, the five different types of people pleasers and understanding which one you are, and improving self-worth, speaking your mind, making decisions that are aligned and living your most authentic life.To connect with Natalie click HERETo connect with Kelley click HERE
How might your life be different if you'd gotten comfortable saying no in your earliest days? No to other people's opinions about everything from education to careers to relationships. No to someone else telling you what to prioritize and how to spend your time. No to people you've never met offering their opinion on what you should or shouldn't do, then tell you how they think your choice worked out.How would your life be different, if you'd gotten okay with choosing for you, and not just for acceptance or obligation? And, how might you reclaim it, if you started getting clear on when and what to say yes or no to from this moment on? And, rid yourself of the need to please? That's what we're diving into with today's guest, Natalie Lue, as a self-proclaimed recovering people pleaser who's spent the past nearly two decades unwinding the need to please and reclaiming freedom and ease. Natalie is a writer, speaker, podcaster, artist, and founder of one of the longest-running personal-growth websites in the world, Baggage Reclaim and The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast, and author of the new book, The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want. In our conversation, Natalie opens up about her struggles with people-pleasing, something we all know about and have experienced to some degree. We talk about the life events that brought Natalie back to herself, back to reclaiming her boundaries and life, and we get into some of the nitty-gritty of what it looks like to say yes to the life you want and how to embrace the joy of saying no. You can find Natalie at: Website | Instagram | The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcastIf you LOVED this episode you'll also love the conversations we had with Susan Piver about the Enneagram and how it helps us relate to others and also set boundaries.Check out our offerings & partners: My New Book SparkedMy New Podcast SPARKED: We're looking for special guest “wisdom-seekers” to share the moment you're in, then pose questions to Jonathan and the Sparked Braintrust to be answered, “on air.” To submit your “moment & question” for consideration to be on the show go to sparketype.com/submit. Visit Our Sponsor Page For Great Resources & Discount CodesPeloton: Access high-energy workouts, instantly. Discover Peloton: streaming fitness classes to you live and on-demand. New Members who choose monthly billing get a 30-day free trial, or choose annual billing and get 12 months of Membership for the price of 10. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Do you have trouble saying “no”? What could the trees tell you if you stopped to listen? In this episode of Awaken Your Wise Woman, host Elizabeth Cush and author Natalie Lue talk about the liberating power of that two-letter word. “'No' does not have to feel perfect. It doesn't have to feel easy. It just needs to be true.” — Natalie Lue You can find the show notes and resources for this and every episode here.
There's a trap many people discover when they transition to retirement: saying yes to0 soon or too often. The problem? Your hard-earned freedom can be squeezed by commitments to other people's needs, not your true priorities. Natalie Lue discusses her new book The Joy of Saying No and the specific challenges faced by people pleasers. She's found that there are five distinct types, and each one comes with it's own challenges. What boundaries might be wise to set in 2023? Listen in to my conversation with Natalie Lue for sound advice. Natalie Lue joins us from Surrey, England. _________________________ Bio Natalie is the author of the hugely popular relationship and self-esteem blog, Baggage Reclaim (baggagereclaim.com) along with five books, including The Joy of Saying No (HarperCollins/Harper Horizon) and Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl. She also hosts The Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast, which has over 3 million downloads. For nearly two decades, she's shared the journey of her transition from toxic relationships to love, care, trust and respect. Her work has been mentioned and featured in the likes of The New York Times, Washington Post, NPR, BBC, The Sunday Times Magazine, and USA Today. _________________________ For More on Natalie Lue The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want Website _________________________ Is your bank account better prepared for retirement than you are? Take our free quiz and see how you can balance your retirement planning. _________________________ Podcast Episodes You May Enjoy Chatter & Your Inner Voice – Ethan Kross Everyday Vitality – Dr. Samantha Boardman Plays Well with Others – Eric Barker The Emotional Side of Retiring – Kate Schroeder __________________________ Wise Quotes On Why We Say Yes - When We Really Want to Say No "I think a lot of the time we say yes because we are on some level afraid of what will happen if we say no. And that might be a very conscious thought in that moment, but often it's more of a feeling that we have that we just almost automatically respond to it by saying yes.We like to make people feel good, and that means different things to different people. But in that moment, even though we might already know, I really, really don't want to do that, we make that person feel good by letting them believe that that's what we want to do. We like that. We like being thought of as nice and helpful and as unselfish and good. And these prompt us to say one thing on the outside and have a totally different thing going on internally. I think it is a habit." On Boundaries "I wrote this book because I genuinely had discovered the healing and transformative power of saying no and having boundaries. And I make a point of saying that because I think that people see boundaries as saying no and telling people what to do. And a big thing that I learned about having boundaries was boundaries are about being more of who you really are. Because then we're operating from a place of integrity, authenticity, and honesty." On Your People Pleaser Entourage "What people discover when they start saying no is that they possibly have a people pleaser entourage, certain people in their life who benefit from them not saying no. Celebrities sometimes have that group of hanger-ons. And even though they're blowing all their money none of these hanger-ons point that out because they don't want to stop the gravy train. So a lot of people pleasers discover there are certain people who are really reliant on you just going along with things and that can feel very uncomfortable initially. What they also discover though is that a lot of the things that they were nervous about saying no to aren't really that big of a deal." ___________________________ About Retirement Wisdom Living well is the best revenge. Design a Retirement Your Boss Will Envy.
In this episode, Natalie Lue talks about her new book called, The Joy of Saying No: How to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaiming Boundaries, and Saying Yes to the Life You Want. We talked about how in order to say no to your partner it requires authenticity and vulnerability which are going to be helpful to the relationship overall. Find out more about Natalie Lue at https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/ The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes. Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.
Do your relationships tend to develop at a romantic comedy pace, only to get messy fast and fall apart dramatically? If you've struggled to find sustainable, lasting love, then this episode is for you. Learn about common pacing pitfalls that prevent couples from building stable partnerships, including red flags such as love bombing, how pacing can help you work skillfully with the “addiction” of love, and what to do when your pacing doesn't match your partner's.Key Takeaways00:00 - Intro02:15 - What is pacing in dating? And why should we care?19:00 - How can we pace the development of a new relationship for long-term success?36:20 - What are signs that pacing is off in a new relationship?49:50 - What if your pacing doesn't match your partner's pacing?Resources and linksFor full show notes with links, visit relationshipcenter.com/podcastEpisode 1: You aren't crazy, dating is hard (especially for anxious folx)Episode 2: What to look for in a long-term partnerEight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John Gottman Ph.D., Julie Schwartz Gottman PhD, Doug Abrams, and Rachel Carlton Abrams M.D.Natalie Lue's blog Baggage ReclaimLike this show? Please leave us a review here - even a short review helps other people find the show!Looking for some help finding your person? Visit relationshipcenter.com
Today we're chatting about our external environments! As Lori Harder says, "our environment is our willpower," which means that if we're constantly surrounded by apathy and negativity, eventually we'll take on those qualities. Of course, as ambitious women, we're going to still try to be the best we can be, despite the crappy environment around us, which is awesome... but, let's also be real about it: that takes a lot of energy! At the end of the day, we deserve so much more than that. If you're in a situation where you're questioning your environment, listen in for an epic pep talk that could help you get unstuck! We're in this together!
Negotiate Anything: Negotiation | Persuasion | Influence | Sales | Leadership | Conflict Management
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company In this episode, Natalie Lue, Relationship Expert, Author, Speaker and Podcaster, discusses how to know your people pleasing, how empowering it can be to overcome it, and some strategies to overcome it. Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn Follow Natalie on LinkedIn Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race! Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!
Hello and welcome back to Ctrl Alt Delete podcast! Over a series of three episodes I've been chatting to someone whose work I really admire and enjoy, Natalie Lue, author, podcaster and host of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions. She helps people-pleasers, perfectionists and relationship strugglers become more of who they really are and achieve what they want to achieve. In this episode we are discussing how we can find more time to focus and do our 'deep work', inspired by Cal Newport's brilliant book Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World and Oliver Burkeman's '3 or 4 hours' rule which you read on his blog here.Throughout the episodes in this mini series, we'll discuss how smarter technology can solve problems, create opportunities and transform the way we all live, learn, and work. The tools we use are important, and can empower passionate people who value their own health, wellbeing and the world they live in and impact change for a better world. I'm excited to dig in. Thanks to Lenovo for making this mini-series happen!Check out more from Lenovo here: https://www.lenovo.com/gb/en/laptops/thinkpad/thinkpad-x1/c/thinkpadx1*This mini series is in paid partnership with LenovoPre-order Natalie's book here: https://amzn.to/3REVgxBListen to the other episode with Natalie herE:My Substack page, come and say hi: https://thehyphen.substack.com/My books: https://uk.bookshop.org/contributors/emma-gannonBooks mentioned on Ctrl Alt Delete podcast: https://uk.bookshop.org/lists/books-mentioned-on-ctrl-alt-delete-podcastTwitter: Twitter.com/emmagannonInstagram: Instagram.com/emmagannonuk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.