Podcasts about Frank Carson

In this special-feature episode, Frank Carson and his co-defendants are accused of a complicated murder conspiracy after a three-year investigation. Among the accused: three cops.

In this special-release bonus episode, our host Christopher Goffard talks with false-confession expert Richard Leo, who questions the credibility of the government's star witness.  

In this special featured episode, the discovery of Korey Kauffman's remains gives the investigation new impetus, and a man named Robert Woody offers a methamphetamine-fueled “confession.” But his story changes again and again. 

 In this special-release bonus episode,  our host Christopher Goffard is joined by his editor, Steve Clow, to discuss the origins of The Trials of Frank Carson.

In this special-released bonus episode,  our host Christopher Goffard is joined by his editor, Steve Clow, to talk about how authorities linked the disappearance of Korey Kauffman to Frank Carson.

In this special-release episode, when a young scrap-metal thief named Korey Kauffman vanishes, local police do not immediately show great interest. Then a parolee named Big Mike Cooley tells a story that gets their attention: Kauffman was last seen venturing onto Frank Carson's property to steal some pipes. Authorities confront Carson and work to build a case against him. 

While you wait for season two of Crimes of the Times, please enjoy a featured season of the LA Times Studios podcast The Trials of Frank Carson. It's about a criminal defense attorney who is accused of masterminding a murder conspiracy — and who insists he's being framed.

Some years ago, I used this text as part of an article I published. (Apologies for being the first to mention Christmas on 7th May 2025.) "My mother who never went abroad in her life was the owner of a passport. It was called Christmas, and it marked the completion of one journey and the beginning of another. To her, Christmas was a way of saying we've arrived, we're here, we've come through. Poverty, illness, worries, bills, all the dangers, the reefs, the storms, we're past. We were at anchor in a lagoon of quiet water before again venturing upon the high seas. And, like all passports, Christmas was not to be tampered with. Safely dwelt in its unwavering sameness. Every moment of the day itself was a re-run of the same moment a year ago and would itself be repeated a year hence." Hugh Leonard - Short Story Christmas Time Machine Back then, when I had the first draft of the article ready, I had Grammarly check the text (an excellent tool for those like me who could be better at spelling and grammar). The poor program nearly had heart failure (if computers have hearts?) and told me everything about the paragraph was incorrect. Today, I pasted the paragraph into an AI platform, and it said the following "The passage is evocative and metaphorically rich, but a few tweaks could enhance its clarity, flow, and emotional impact. Here are some suggestions:" Am I going to let AI correct one of Ireland's best-loved writers? No way! Too often, when I'm coaching clients for an important presentation they keep insisting that they need a script. Here is my reply: Scripts are for actors, yet the best actors always want to reduce the text. They know that a gesture or a change of tone can impart more meaning than memorising and delivering lines. Years ago, there was a famous Northern Ireland comedian, Frank Carson, whose catch phrase was "It's the way I tell 'em" The same applies whether you are looking to create a presentation to inform, bring about a change, or win sales and investment. It's the way I tell them - still applies. I coach people to have a conversation with their audience. Converse with people, and they will listen and more importantly engage with you. Here is an excellent piece of advice from one of Obama's speechwriters, David Litt, in his book, 'THANKS, OBAMA' "People hate words and love pictures" I would suggest that words, when used correctly, can create pictures. The secret is to add detail to your conversation. Please reread Hugh Leonard's opening to his short story, and you will understand what I mean. By Executive Coach Andrew Keogh of Aristo.ie

Mark and Gary kick off this episode with an unexpected but entertaining dive into Southern California theme parks—from Knott's Berry Farm nostalgia to a full ranking of Disneyland, Legoland, Universal Studios, and more. Then, they unpack the media frenzy surrounding Bill Maher's recent meeting with Donald Trump and his '2 Angry Men' podcast appearance. The conversation rounds out with a deep dive into the high-profile settlement in the Frank Carson malicious prosecution case and thoughts on Supreme Court developments. Watch Beyond A Reasonable Doubt and all Reasonable Doubt video content on YouTube exclusively at YouTube.com/ReasonableDoubtPodcast and subscribe while you're there.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Her Mentula Cōleī BaptismA Series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Christmas was fast approaching, and festive events were in full swing at St. Michael's Church."Well not long to go until Jesus' birthday," Reverend Morris smiled as he and Jenna finished putting up their Christmas decorations. "Just two weeks. Which reminds me, there's another very special person's birthday a week before the festive season, ""Oh yes. I'd forgotten!" Jenna replied."Jenna my love, it's your 21st! You can't forget something like that. I want it to be a truly memorable birthday for you. Is there anything in particular you'd really, really like? Please give it some thought. Turning 21 is a milestone.""I will Simon. But I pretty much have everything I've ever wanted already," she smiled, slipping her arms round him.Later, Jenna was engrossed in reading something on her smartphone."Imagine that," she whispered to herself.Noticing her excitement, Reverend Morris became curious."What's grabbed your attention, Jen?"" Mentula Cōleī Baptism," she blurted out, without thinking.Her husband looked confused. "Pardon?""Oh! It's nothing. Just an old fertility rite of the Eastern Orthodox, in some Asian nations! The Japanese call it bukkake. The loose translation of ‘Mentula Cōleī' is ‘cock & balls'. And it follows the Anglican tradition of sprinkling. Er, would you like a cup of tea?”"Sure."Later, when Jenna was having a shower, Reverend Morris picked up his phone. "Bukkake, she said. How does one spell that, then?" He typed into the browser. Boocaka? Bookaki? Bukacay? On the third attempt, the browser's autocorrect suggested the correct term."Oh, so that's how it's spelt. He clicked on a Wikipedia link. "Good God!" He spluttered, as he read all about the act. When he'd finished, he chuckled to himself. "You learn something new every day. The Internet never disappoints, "At the Wednesday Eucharist, Gordon had just finished the recessional hymn. The midweek service always had a lower turnout than the Sunday service, but numbers had been steadily increasing all year."Morning Gordon," Reverend Morris said, appearing at the side of the organ."Oh hello vicar," the organist replied. "Quite full today. I don't know, the news says that Christianity is declining in this country but this church seems to be the exception.""It does, and that pleases me greatly. I can't speak for all churches in England, but knowing that our community here at St. Michael's is thriving, well it lifts my heart. I tend not to pay much attention to the news these days. Too depressing. Difficult times for so many. Strikes, cost of living and all that. Oh and England getting knocked out of the World Cup.""Mmm, yes," Gordon nodded. "Couldn't care less about football. I never watch it. Horse racing is my thing. How's Jenna and Christopher?""Oh they're both fine, actually I need to discuss something important with you, Gordon. Jenna's 21st birthday is next week. I was wondering if you could help me with something?""Certainly, vicar!" He replied, switching off the light above the organ's keyboards. "Happy to help in any way I can.""Okay, but not here. Come to my study right now, please.""Right you are," Gordon said. He didn't even have time to remove his robe and hang it up in the vestry. He was intrigued. The way the vicar was summoning him to the study sounded a bit ominous. He felt like a kid at school being summoned to the headmaster in order to receive a punishment. He meekly followed the vicar down the aisle."Close the door if you please," Reverend Morris said, as he beckoned the organist into the study. Gordon did as he asked, and was surprised to find Josh the curate, Father Aiden, Bishop George and Norman Winstanley the new churchwarden all waiting."Eh, what's all this, vicar?" Gordon exclaimed. "A lads-only party?""Gentlemen," Reverend Morris began. "I've invited you here because you are trusted spiritual mentors; and trusted friends of mine. As servants of God, you all have your own important tasks to perform. Now what I am about to ask you, requires a great deal of trust. As good Christians, I wonder if you'll be able to fulfil this very unique anointing ceremony a parishioner has requested."Father Aiden crossed himself. "I am always ready to do the Lord's work.""Me too," Gordon said. "And if there's free beer included, well that's a bonus!""Well this task concerns Jenna, my wife."The men in the study all fell silent. There was a great deal of shuffling feet and awkward coughs!One week later,"Where are we going, Simon?" Jenna asked, as he got into the car. She assumed they were going to a restaurant."The church. Just a little birthday surprise."When they arrived, Reverend Morris requested that Jenna close her eyes."Absolutely no peeking!" He said as he led her down the aisle."This is so exciting!" Jenna said. "Let me guess, the whole congregation of St. Michael's are going to leap out and yell Happy Birthday, right?""Close, but no cigar!" The vicar replied. "Now, just sit on this stool, "Father Aiden was driving down the high street, on his way to St. Michael's Church. His heart was pounding like crazy."I can't believe I agreed to take part in this," he mumbled to himself. "Lord in heaven, why am I doing this? Haven't I sinned enough already?"He fiddled with the car radio. Most of the stations were planning Christmas songs 24/7 now. Chris's Rea's Driving Home for Christmas started playing. This was the third time today he'd heard this song. Passing a Tesco Express store, Father Aiden decided he needed some Dutch courage before he could partake in the special "celebration" at the church. A cheap bottle of whiskey or gin would suffice. Parking up, he hurried into the store and walked straight into a woman who was loaded up with shopping."I'm so sorry!" He exclaimed, picking up the tube of gift wrap she'd dropped."Aiden?"He froze and looked up. "Róisín?""My God! It is you! I can't believe it!" the red-haired woman gasped."W-what are you doing in this neck of the woods?" Father Aiden said. "Did you leave Liverpool?""Sure did. I've jumped ship. I'm at the Living Earth Free Church now and I'm loving every minute. I've become a vicar, well they call us leaders. It suits me just fine. What about you, are you still with the Catholic Church?"The priest looked awkwardly at her. "Erm, sort of. I've been fighting a conflict with myself these past couple of weeks."Róisín smiled at him. "You think your future lies elsewhere?"He took a deep breath. "Maybe?"She put down her shopping bags and took his hand. "I've never stopped thinking about you, Aiden. I know you broke things off because you couldn't break your celibacy vows, ""Oh but that's the thing. I fled Liverpool and moved to this town, and the first thing I did was to break my celibacy vows, "Róisín's face fell. "Oh, so you've met someone?""Uh, No. It was just a, one-off. But it made me think that I'm just not cut out for a celibate life. And because of that, I can't continue in my current profession.""Well you're too attractive for that."A blush spread across the priest's face. "Would you like to go for a drink?""Thought you'd never ask! Let me dump this stuff in the car and then I'm all yours!""Sorry Jenna," Father Aiden said to himself as he slipped his arm around Róisín and they strolled into the town center. "But I'm sure you'll have fun without me. Thanks for helping me see the light though."Jenna could hear muffled whisperings and several male voices. She wondered what was going to happen next. "Can I look yet?""No not yet," Reverend Morris replied. "Just a sec, " The vicar ushered Gordon, Josh, Bishop George and Norman in front of the altar, where several candles has been lit. "Where's Father Aiden?""Guess he chickened out?" Gordon muttered. "Maybe he's in a confession booth? Ha-ha!""Oh well, fair enough. It was a lot to ask, Okay Jenna, you can open your eyes now!"Jenna opened her eyes, to see the organist, the curate, the Bishop, and the churchwarden all stood round her. Gordon was wearing his best suit and the black robe he wore when playing the organ, andJosh was wearing his cassock and surplice."Oh my. Good evening, boys!" She said. "Are you all here to wish me Happy Birthday?""We certainly are," Gordon grinned, rubbing his crotch. "We're here to give you the most memorable birthday ever, eh chaps? As it's a special one, and you're a very special lass, Jenna!""Aww, you're all so sweet," Jenna replied, still not aware of what was about to happen. "I love being part of this church.""And you've brought so much happiness to it," Reverend Morris said. Now it's time for us to repay your kindness." He nodded at Gordon and the others. "Now don't keep my lovely wife waiting, she's eager to be baptized!""Huh?" Jenna blinked. "Baptized?"Gordon volunteered to go first. He unzipped his trousers and pulled out his cock. "Come on lads, don't be shy, eh?" Seconds later, Josh and Bishop George did the same. Norman hesitated a moment, but finally followed suit and unzipped. Jenna's mouth dropped in amazement as four delicious erect cocks were pointed right at her. She was too stunned to speak, and turned to Reverend Morris, who was standing back from the others, and also wearing church vestments."This is our 21st birthday present to you," the vicar said. "A Mentula Cōleī Baptism." It's been part of early Assyrian Christian marriage ceremonies in Asia, to anoint a young bride's womb, before the couple consummates. The church elders would meet with the couple after the public ceremony vows, to anoint the virgin."Oh, my, God" Jenna gasped. "Simon, how?"The reverend simply put his hands together, as though in prayer. "I asked God for help in getting you the perfect present. He knows everything, you see. I'm just sorry that Father Aiden decided to opt out, and unfortunately the Archbishop of Canterbury was unavailable as he's currently in Ukraine. John Wesley's ghost, well one cannot book a last-minute appointment with the dead, alas. But I hope those of us that are here will satisfy you?"Jenna licked her lips. "Hell yes!" She knelt down before them. "Oh Gordon, I see you've got an organ pipe that needs blowing," she said as she pulled down his trousers and briefs and squeezed his erection. "Let's see if you can hit the right notes.""I always hit the right notes," he chuckled. "Especially when you're playing my instrument, ""Umm. You're an organist who always entertains," she commented as she lowered her mouth over the end of his cock.Jenna sucked on the head, tasting him as she ran her tongue over the sensitive opening, while pumping the shaft with her hand. She took more and more of his hardness into her mouth until she felt him hit the back of her throat. She relaxed and pushed on until she had his whole member in her mouth and she was nuzzling his silvery pubic hair. He groaned as he grabbed the back of her head and thrust into her mouth.Reverend Morris watched in admiration and amazement as his wife expertly sucked the organist's cock. Gordon was quite well-endowed, but that was no challenge to Jenna. Seeing her pleasuring another man like this had got him as hard as a rock. He massaged his erection through his cassock and surplice. Could she cope with more than one man though?Josh was growing impatient, and his cock was desperate for attention. "Fancy trying some younger meat, Jenna? I think you've fully re-tuned the organist's organ.""Don't rush the lass," Gordon sighed. "Wait your turn, lad!""I'm sure you can't wait to taste it," he said as he pushed his throbbing shaft in her face.Jenna didn't hesitate, she removed Gordon's cock and Josh pushed his erection deep into her mouth. He grabbed her head and she began sucking him hard."Oh yeah! Praise the Lord! Oh I'm coming!""So soon?" Gordon chuckled. You younger fellas have no endurance!""Now now, enough of that," Jenna said. Play nice." She unbuttoned her blouse, exposing her pert breasts. "Mmm, give me some cum, Josh!"The sight of her tits pushed the curate over the edge and he erupted, glazing them with his hot seed."So delicious! Thanks so much Josh. What an impressive load. No longer shy I see! Like I said, you'll make one hell of a vicar one day!" Jenna felt an intense tingling sensation of arousal and a moistening in her pussy. The crotch of her panties turned a darker shade of red as her nectar seeped out of her and soaked them. Reaching under her skirt, she began fingering herself."We vicars produce more cum, right?" Reverend Morris chuckled, jacking off in the background."Hell yes.""Organists produce a lot too," Gordon interrupted. "Oh fuck, now I'm coming, Jenna, .oh!"Jets of creamy white cum surged forth through the air from the tip of Gordon's thick "organ pipe." As the first of them struck Jenna's pale skin she could feel the warmth of the virile seed upon her face. More strands of spunk splashed across her cheeks. A jet catching her on the nose quickly dripped down across her lips and chin and filled her nostrils with its tangy odor. Jenna could feel the thick sticky goo mess her red hair. Jizz ran down her forehead in rivulets joining the cum on her nose and cheeks or getting stuck in a gooey mess in her eyelashes. By now her eyes were closing somewhat as she reached her own orgasm. Letting out a mewling moan she came to the plastering of her face with the organist's cum."Cum cantibus in choro. Cum canticis et organo!" Jenna yelled."I should know what that means, but I don't," Gordon panted."It translates as "let the organ thunder, let voice and organ sing."Gordon was smug, knowing that it was his spunk that had made her climax. "Latin is full of cum isn't it? How marvelous!""Wow Jenna, I'm impressed." Bishop George smiled, calmly presenting his cock to her. "You're an expert at playing the pipe organ. But now I have a bishop for you to bash.""Right Reverend, it is an honor to get my hands on your crosier again," Jenna said, pulling his trousers down."Bloody hell, are you wearing ladies' knickers Bish?" Gordon interrupted, noticing the pink panties. "You kinky bugger.""High ranking clergy need to be comfortable under their cassocks!" Bishop George replied. "Ah, Oh my God!" Jenna gently took hold of his shaft with one dainty hand and began to stroke his length. At the same time her lips slipped down to his balls and she began to suck gently upon one of them. When she took the entire orb into her mouth the bishop groaned as he felt her tongue began to tease the tender flesh. He could scarcely believe that this was happening, that the parish vicar's wife was on her knees before him sucking his pastoral staff in the church!Jenna took care to alternate from one of the bishop's plums to another as she stroked up and down his length with one hand. Droplets of precum had begun to escape the tip of his cock and she could feel them dripping down onto her forehead. She began to lick a wavy trail along the underside of his shaft moving her tongue from side to side as she worked her way towards the tip of his prick. When she reached the base of his head she opened her mouth, her tongue still touching his cock-head, and gripping at the base of his shaft she worked her hand down along his length forcing the precum out and straight onto her tongue."Wow," Reverend Morris said. "She's amazing. Taking the Bishop as well!""Blessed, " Bishop George said, closing his eyes and putting his bony hands together. "Jenna, I anoint thee!" He may have been the oldest man of the group, but he produced a tremendous amount of cum. Jenna hurriedly cast off her sticky blouse, just in time to be baptized in Bishop George's holy jizz. she almost wasn't prepared for the huge volume of cum he released, and this was far from over!"Oh dear Lord, Reverend!" She moaned, as the copious dollop of man-juice coated her face, breasts and belly, just about everywhere, mixing with the cum already released by Josh and Gordon. It was so viscous and creamy, fuck! Jenna was in ecstasy! She'd never imagined bukkake would be as good as this, and in the church, well that just made it even better! The candlelight reflected off her glazed breasts. It was all so overwhelming and she came a second time."Ready for some more, little vixen?" Norman the churchwarden said, offering his cock to her. "I'll tell you a Frank Carson joke. So, an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks at them and says: "Is this some kind of a joke?"Jenna giggled. "This cock of yours is no joke, Norman!" She grabbed it with both hands. "You've been good haven't you? Keeping your hands to yourself?""I kept my promise. I'd like to get my hands on you though. I think you'd better slip out of that skirt. It's already spunked up. Any chance I could squeeze that arse of yours?""I want you to cum all over my arse cheeks, Norman. Think you can manage that?""Is the Pope a Catholic?" Norman replied.Jenna slipped out of her skirt and tossed it on a pew. Now she was wearing nothing except a pair of drenched red panties, and her high-heeled sandals. Her tongue darted out as she licked the churchwarden's cock the way a cat licks up cream. Every inch of his shaft got the hallowed treatment as she expertly fellated him. She rubbed her nose and face against his balls, making him groan with joy."Bet that's more fun than guiding the flock to communion, right?" Gordon said."Not half!" Norman panted.Sensing he was about to come, Jenna removed his cock and turned round. Pulling her panties down, she presented her rear to him and Norman responded, sliding his cock against her welcoming arse cheeks."Alleluia!" Norman yelled. He hot-dogged her for a bit, but then his cock erupted, and thick spunk blasted across her tight buns. The salty goo coated her arse entirely, running down her thighs and dripping onto the church floor. Norman's cock twitched some more, spewing out some final strands of cum across Jenna's lower back."Mmm, that feels so good, Norman! Look at me! I'm covered in cum. This is wonderful! I love this so much! Oh thank you all so much!""Happy 21st Birthday Jenna," all four men said. Gordon walked over, wiped Jenna's face with a tissue and gave her a passionate French kiss. "You're amazing. Thanks for everything you've done for us."Next, Josh did the same. Bishop George kissed her on the lips and both cheeks. "A Holy Trinity Kiss for you," he said. Finally, Norman kissed her, and managed to give her arse a pinch at the same time."The birthday ceremony isn't quite over yet," Reverend Morris said, walking over and helping his wife to her feet. "Gordon, organ music if you please!""Right you are, vicar," the organist smiled, zipping up his trousers and hurrying over to the organ. The vicar nodded at Josh and Norman."Gentlemen. Please move the candles."They did as asked, and before Jenna could say anything, Reverend Morris gathered her up in his arms and laid her on top of the altar. Slowly, he slid off her red panties and handed them to Bishop George.Gordon began playing the great hymn of Charles Wesley, "And Can It Be", Jenna's favorite hymn."And now, allow me to give you my gift, my love!" Reverend Morris said. He spread Jenna's legs apart, fumbled with his surplice and cassock and freed his cock. Without hesitation he slid in and began to thrust inside her. Jenna moaned as her folds spread around her husband's holy rod. Nothing could have prepared her for being fucked on the altar! Following up his initial thrust the vicar began to pound his wife harder and deeper. Josh, Bishop George and Norman stood in front of the altar, holding the candles and singing the hymn.It didn't take long for Jenna to orgasm a third time. The organ sound, the lust-filled faces of the curate, bishop and churchwarden staring at her, her husband's thrusts, it sent her over the edge. As she came her eyes rolled back and her tongue hung limply from one side of her mouth. Reverend Morris grabbed her by the back of her head, his fingers wrapping in her sticky, cum-filled red hair, kissing her lips passionately. She was still cumming when he joined her. With a groan and uttering a quick muffled prayer to the Lord, he came, shooting his sacred seed inside her. While still buried inside her, cum began to overflow out around his cock, dripping on to the white cloth that covered the altar.Reverend Morris withdrew his cock, and spewed the last drops of his cum across Jenna's face. Extending a finger, he coated the tip in his jizz and marked the sign of the cross on Jenna's forehead."Happy Birthday Jenna, my love! I hope your present was all that you hoped it would be?"Jenna was so giddy, exhausted and overwhelmed, she could barely speak. A massive grin spread her face."It was the best birthday present ever! Thanks be to God!"Oh Cum All Ye FaithfulChristmas Eve had arrived, but over at St. Michael's vicarage, Reverend Morris was in a bit of a panic."Oh dear, what terrible timing," he sighed, as he put down his smartphone."What's up?" Jenna asked, handing him a glass of mulled wine. "Is it about tonight's carol service?""Unless I can find an organist willing to step in for Gordon, I'm afraid we'll be forced to have a rather muted carol service, with only the piano!" The vicar sighed.A look of horror spread across Jenna's face. "Oh no, Gordon! Is he okay?""Gordon's fine. It's his cousin Barry, who lives in Yorkshire. He's taken a tumble on some ice and broken his ankle. He's recovering at home, but he lives alone and can't manage by himself over Christmas. His daughter Lisa, lives in Florida. So Gordon has decided to stay with him until after the new year, when Lisa will be flying over.""Aww. That's so kind of him. Nobody should be on their own at Christmas. Let's hope Barry makes a speedy recovery. But the carol service just won't be the same without Gordon playing the organ. He's, taught me a lot, but I'm not up the standard where I can play fluently during a church service yet! The organ is so complicated."In truth, Jenna had spent rather more time playing Gordon's 8 inch organ rather than the church organ. "Simon, I'll gladly play the piano at the service, although you're right, it'll be feeble-sounding by comparison."Reverend Morris sighed. "I really appreciate that, my love. People are expecting a fantastic Christmas service this year, to make up for the two years we lost due to the pandemic. With all the bad news recently, they need cheering up. I've been going on about the carol service for weeks, promoting it online, putting ads in the gazette. I even forked out for an ad on the local radio. You simply can't have Hark the Herald Angels and O Come All Ye Faithful played on anything else but a pipe organ!""Is there nobody else who could take Gordon's place?""Not at such short notice. The service is only seven hours away! I phoned Tom Fishwick who used to play at St. Paul's, but he lives ten miles away and can't drive. He can't get here due to the train strikes. So I tried Sundeep Kapoor over at the Living Earth Free Church, but he's at home suffering from a chest infection, plus his cat has developed ringworm, so he's stressed out about that."Jenna groaned. "What a nightmare.""That just leaves Raymond Wilson, the organist at Oakwood Road Methodist Church. Oakwood had its carol service this morning, so he might be available. But, ""But what? Get on that phone pronto, Simon!""Raymond's notoriously difficult to work with," Reverend Morris replied. "I don't like to speak ill of people, but I'm not that keen on him. He's rude and awkward. A bit of an Ebenezer Scrooge."Gordon used to be a bit like that, before I was able to cheer him up, Jenna smirked to herself. "Oh I see. I wonder why he's like that?""Some people are just like that, and I don't think Raymond's that keen on Christmas anyway.""I don't mind speaking to him," Jenna said. "He doesn't scare me!"The vicar perked up. "Would you? I confess the last time I spoke to him on the phone, I got a tirade of abuse.""Leave it to me," the wily redhead replied, although she wasn't planning to speak to him by phone."I must dash, Jen. I've got to head over to the church hall and drop these foodbank items off, then I'm going to take this shopping round to Mrs. Grimes.""Don't wear yourself out, Simon. Big day tomorrow! Our first Christmas together, and my parents, your parents, Lucy, Debbie and Christopher will be joining us for dinner. It'll be so nice for Christopher to have a big family Christmas.""I always have the Lord's work to do!" Reverend Morris laughed, hurrying out. "Love you. See you later!"Jenna smiled to herself as she looked through the address book. "So this organist is like Scrooge is he?" She said as she found Raymond Wilson's home address. "Well Scrooge was redeemed in the end, after he saw the three ghosts. Oh that reminds me. Home Alone and the Alistair Sim version of A Christmas Carol are on later. Must make sure the TV is set to record them."Raymond Wilson had arrived home after playing the organ at Oakwood's carol service. He poured himself a brandy and slumped in an armchair. A tall skinny man, who looked to be in need of a good meal. He was fifty, but looked a lot older. Years of being hunched over playing the Methodist church's organ had left him with a stoop. In recent years, he'd let his white hair grow long until it was almost on his shoulders."Thank God that's over for another year," he muttered. He reached over to the side table and pressed the flashing button on the answerphone. There were two new messages.Beep"Hi Ray. It's Steve. Brandi and I really hope you can visit us for Christmas dinner tomorrow. Brandi's going to cook this time. I taught her how to use the microwave. See you about half-three. Love you!"Beep"Ray, it's Terry. The kids and I are gonna call round tomorrow morning to exchange presents. Noah's hoping Santa's going to bring him the latest Pokémon game. You did get Pokémon Scarlet didn't you? Oh and Mia has her heart set on that Bluey plush. Remember that? The big ones that they sell at the Asda Shop. Don't get any cheap fake stuff off the market stalls. Those soft toys that the Bulgarian guy with the gold tooth sells? Well they tend to have wraps of cocaine inside them, Okay, bye for now!"Raymond drank his brandy. "Bloody kids," he moaned. His younger brother's children were notoriously spoilt, and never wanted to spend any time with him, unless he had some money or a toy to give.He hadn't much time for his cousin Steve either, or his new wife, an airhead former porn star named Brandi Snaps.Raymond was dozing in his chair when the doorbell rang. "This had better not be another of those damned cold callers, ""Raymond Wilson? Hello!" Jenna smiled. She was wearing a Santa hat. Over a white top she had on a red Christmas jumper, bearing a slogan, "Pull My Cracker!" The tight sweater revealed the curves of her perky C-cup tits quite nicely and got her nearly as much attention as her skirt. The short pleated green skirt was just long enough to tease while leaving a good portion of her smooth white thighs visible. Then completing the look she had on a pair of long white socks that came up to a few inches above her knees and black patent leather shoes."Who are you?""I'm the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Cum, " she grinned. Blimey, he really does resemble Scrooge! She thought."Look I'm not in the mood for carol singers," Raymond muttered. He was about to close the door, but she quickly stopped him."I'm Jenna, wife of Reverend Morris over at St. Michael's. I came here because we really need your help!""Huh?" Raymond blinked, looking her up and down. "You're an improvement on his previous wife. So how can I help?""Please may I come in?" Jenna said. "It's so cold out here and my legs are freezing!""You should wear some tights instead of socks," Raymond replied. "Come in. I suppose you'll want a brew?""Oh no thank you, I won't trouble you," Jenna said, sitting opposite him on the couch. "I came to ask you a favor." She told him the church's predicament, and how they were in desperate need of an organist.Raymond folded his arms. "That's a big ask, Mrs. Morris. I've just done the service at Oakwood. It's bloody hard work you know.""Jenna, please call me Jenna. Look, my husband will pay you well. And I will make it worth your while too." She uncrossed her legs, and noticed him shift around in his armchair."How exactly will you make it worth my while? This sounds like bribery." He was starting to feel uncomfortable. He was pretty sure she wasn't wearing any underwear!"Picture the scene, Raymond. A Christmas carol service that's damp squib. Scores of disappointed people expecting to hear the rousing sound of a pipe organ, and instead having to endure the frail tinkling of a humble upright piano, that is long overdue for retuning. Picture the scene at next Christmas Eve. Nobody turning up at our church after last year's disappointment. I don't think my poor husband could bear the shame, ""Oh where's my small violin?" Raymond sarcastically replied."And I've been a good girl all year long!" Jenna continued. She put on her best pouty face and added a bit of a whine to her voice. That of course was a lie worthy of a politician. Standing up, she walked over and pressed her tight arse straight down at the middle of his lap. Pressing down, she gently ground her backside up against him as her hands came to rest on his knees."What the, Mrs, Jenna, this is hardly appropriate!" Raymond spluttered, but his erection prodded up between the curves of her arse, despite his protestations."I don't do appropriate when times are as desperate as this," Jenna sighed. As she spoke she reached a hand behind her and groped his crotch."Oh my God," Raymond groaned. He fumbled and unzipped his black trousers. Gripping his shaft tenderly, Jenna began to stroke his thick long cock. She could hear him whimper with arousal as she teased him."It's true about organists. They all have such impressive instruments!" She giggled."Uh, could I stand up?" Raymond gasped, and she let him. She helped slide his trousers down, pulling his white boxer briefs down with them. Her eyes lit up when she saw his cock spring up upon being freed from containment. This "organ pipe" was perfectly sufficient to sate her carnal designs."What a big instrument!""This is so wrong." Raymond panted, though his body clearly had other feelings on the subject."It's a necessary sin," Jenna replied. She reached down and cupped his hairy balls with one hand while wrapping her fingers around the base of his cock and bringing her face in close to it. Her seductive eyes looked up into his as she pursed her cherry red lips and kissed the organist's fat cock head.It had been a long time since Raymond had experienced any sexual pleasure, having been divorced for many years. He'd never enjoyed a blowjob half as good as this, however. It was almost more than he could stand. Seeing this stunning twentysomething vicar's wife gobbling on his dick had him on the verge of spewing his load right down her throat. Sensing he was close, Jenna pulled his cock out of her mouth and stood up. Pushing him down onto the couch, she straddled him. Raymond's cock teased past her entrance and deep into her pussy. Once he was inside he began to fuck her hard."Oh God yes, Raymond, give it to me! She was delighted with the stamina of this man. To look at him, you'd think he was a frail chap who could be felled by a faint breeze. Never judge a book by its cover. In his twenties, Raymond had been a notorious bare-knuckle fighter.Jenna's yells sent the organist over the edge. With one last thrust, he groaned out loud as his balls surrendered their gift and his thick jizz spurted out inside her."Umm, oh Raymond! Fill me up, Raymond! Feels so good! Oh my God, I'm coming! Ah!"When they'd both calmed down a little, she pulled up off his cock till it slipped all the way out. She stood up straight and closed her thighs, feeling his spunk oozing out of her. "So, Raymond. Will you play the organ at the carol service at St. Michael's tonight? It starts at 6.30. If you could be there at 6, that would be perfect. I'll be directing the choir.""I'll do it. No problem, I'll be there, no problem." Raymond panted, completely dazed. "Tell, your husband, .I'll, .do it for free, ""Aww, I can't thank you enough, Raymond. You're so sweet." Jenna kissed him. "Goodwill to all men, (that includes women too), now that's the true spirit of Christmas, isn't it? Right, I'd better get going. I'll see you later, at the church!"The Christmas Eve carol service at St. Michael's had a bigger attendance than Reverend Morris could ever have hoped for. The church was so packed, that extra chairs had to be provided. For two brief hours, everyone who attended had a superb time and were able to experience comfort and joy, and it more than made up for the two Christmases that had been ruined by the pandemic. During the interval, mince pies and mulled wine were provided.Raymond Wilson performed his duties as an organist to perfection and literally pulled out all the stops. He was true to his word. The St. Michael's organ was much larger than the one he usually played, but it didn't faze him. Thanks to Jenna, he learned to love Christmas again. Like Scrooge, he became "as good a man as the old city ever knew."God bless us, every one!To be continued.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

Fellatio Rites for the Ghost of John WesleyA Series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Jenna took a deep breath as she approached Oakwood Road Methodist Church."Are you sure you don't want me to come in with you?" Reverend Morris asked.She patted his shoulder. "I'll be fine Simon. You don't need to worry. It's the ghost of John Wesley, not Jack the Ripper. This is exciting! I hope he'll appear!""Right, well, I'll be sat in the car then. I hope you won't be too long. Remember, just turn and run the moment you feel in any way uncomfortable.""Reverend Morris, I think you're scared!""No I'm not! I can't help being concerned for the safety of the woman I love can I? Aren't you a tiny bit nervous?""I'm as cool as spring water," Jenna replied. "I was reading all about John Wesley last night. He was a true gentleman. I'm sure this won't take long."Reverend Morris nodded as he watched his wife enter the church. "Well if anyone can fix this, Jenna can. I don't know what she said to the Archbishop of Canterbury last week, but he changed his mind about the wall plaque faster than the Government does U-turns. I wonder what she said to him? Whatever it was, Justin Welby was impressed!"He reclined in his car seat. "I was so lucky to meet Jenna. Of course, it was God who delivered her to me. That fateful Sunday morning in the vestry, oh."Father Aiden was walking along the street. Many things were on his mind. He had some important decisions to make about his future in the priesthood. Briefly glancing up from his smartphone, his heart jumped as he spotted Jenna entering the Methodist church across the road."Holy Mother, " he muttered. A rush of excitement swept over him as he recalled the intimate encounter he'd enjoyed a few weeks ago. It was that which had spurred him to think about his future. He quickly crossed the road."Hello Father!"The priest almost dropped his phone. Someone was shouting at him from a parked car."Oh, Reverend Morris. Hello there." Damn, no chance of a repeat encounter, he thought. "I've just seen your wife going into the Methodist church.""Yes, I hope she won't be long. I'm just waiting for her.""Are you alright? You look a bit anxious, if you don't mind me saying.""It's a long story, Father. I think you'd better sit down in the passenger seat and I'll tell you. You've not heard about what's been going on in Oakwood Road church have you?"The priest looked confused. "Nope. Tell me more!" He opened the car door and sat down. I could do to unburden myself too.""Okay, well, this might sound a bit weird.""I can handle anything weird," Father Aiden replied."It's about ghosts. As a Catholic, what are your thoughts on them and have you ever seen one?"Father Aiden thought about his answer very carefully. "Hmm. In theory, billions of ghosts potentially exist because billions of human beings have "lost" their bodies through death. Strictly speaking, these disembodied souls are not ghosts because they have never become discernible to any living people. Only those few souls whose presence is seen or felt by others are truly ghosts. And their existence is real.""So you've seen one?""Yes. Two actually. Once in Ireland when I was a child and another when I was based in Liverpool. I was called upon to rid a family's home of a troubled spirit."Reverend Morris looked relieved. "That's good to know.""The Old Testament also has a few ghost stories. The most famous one is in 1 Samuel 28:8--20. Here the inspired writer tells how King Saul met with the ghost of the prophet Samuel." Father Aiden replied. "Have you seen a ghost?""Yes. And not just any ghost, but the ghost of John Wesley! He's haunting the Methodist church. That's why I'm here. Jenna's gone in there to try and help him return to, the other side.""Oh I see, then she must, wait, what?" Father Aiden did a double take."Thanks for coming' along Mrs. Morris," Reverend Ewing said, shaking Jenna's hand. "I know you probably think this whole thing is crazy.""Not at all! And call me Jenna. I'm a true believer. If my husband says that you and he saw John Wesley, then I know it's true. But why does John want to see me of all people?""Your hubby mentioned that your grandma is a Methodist?""Uh yeah. Bit of a tenuous link. Like Sir Henry Barrington-Smythe's horse.""Huh?""Oh, never mind. Figure of speech.""You Brits and your little quirks!" Reverend Ewing laughed. "I'm still getting used to 'em!""You said John usually appears in the vestry?""Uh-huh. Can be anywhere in the church, but he seems to like the vestry best.""Right, well go and wait in there and say a few prayers, and see if he appears. I'm not sure I can do anything, but I'll try my best."Jenna entered the vestry. Everything looked perfectly normal in there. She closed the door and looked around."It always comes back to the vestry," she smiled to herself as she recalled when she first got to know Reverend Morris.Suddenly, the row of gowns on the rail began to swing on their hangers. The temperature dropped, and Jenna rubbed her arms."Are you there, John?" She called out."Yes."She spun round. There was no sign of the spirit. "Hey, come on, show yourself at least. It's no fun talking to the invisible man.""My sincere apologies," John replied, and slowly faded into view. For the first time, Jenna was taken aback. "My God, you really are John Wesley, "He nodded and bowed. "Bless ye, for am so honored you hath come here. If I may be so bold to say, you be a lady of great beauty my dear.""Very kind of you to say, Mr. Wesley." Jenna said. "Why are you back in the land of the living? Aren't you happy in Heaven?""Ah yes," he began. "Happier than mortals can ever imagine. But you see, I feel compelled to return to this realm every All Hallow's Eve. I like to re-visit the places where I worshipped back when I was alive. And it was in this very place where this church now stands that I preached to crowds back in the autumn of 1778.""You've got a lot of places to visit in just one night," Jenna said. "I read all about you. You travelled all over England spreading the Word of the Lord. Plus you went to America, the colonies, when you were younger.""Indeed I did, yes. To my regret, I lingered a little too long here, for I found myself unable to return to the afterlife. The sun had started to rise, heralding All Saint's Day. Thus, I am trapped here in this church until next All Hallow's Eve. Only a tremendous release of positive energy could allow me to return before then.""Oh dear. May I ask why out of all the people in the world, you wanted to see me? What can I do? My gran is a Methodist. Is that the reason?""No Miss Jenna. It was your aura that attracted me. It's very strong. I believe God himself must've embodied you with some sort of innate goodness that allows you to help people.""You're making me sound like some kind of saint! I assure you I'm just a regular human being. I'm not particularly gifted in anything, although I do try to be a good person, "John had a rather dreamy expression on his face. "You remind me so much of Grace Murray, a lady I loved and lost, only you be far prettier than her."It was then that Jenna had an idea. A huge grin spread across her face. She'd read all about John Wesley's life and how unlucky he'd been in love. "A tremendous release of positive energy, you say? I think I know something which may cause that!"John put his hands together. "You do? Pray, do tell, my dear.""You need to experience an orgasm. What could be more positive than that?"He blinked. "I beg your pardon?""Oh you know, " She tried to think of a period-appropriate phrase so he'd understand. "The end act of carnal relations?"He blushed. "Oh. Miss Jenna I be a man of God. I don't see how, "Jenna sank to her knees. "Only one way to find out, John!" She paused. So he's a ghost. I've never pleasured a ghost before. Isn't he composed of just gas? He's quite cute, for someone who died in 1791! I wonder if,She reached out to touch him, and expected her hand to pass right through his body, but it didn't. He jolted at her touch."Don't worry John. I've done this before, many times in fact. It's a great honor to be able to do it to you. I'm sure this will help you."The moment of first contact had arrived. Jenna let one hand gently glide ever so slightly over John's thigh, encased in tight black breeches. Reaching out with the other hand, she ran it over his crotch, feeling an impressive bulge."Oh my! I feel strangely warmed yet again!" John sighed.Jenna fumbled with the buttons on his breeches, being more used to zippers. Something large and splendid lurked within. Either that or he had a Bible stuffed down there. "My God!" she gasped, as the Methodist's member was revealed. The short, slightly-built John Wesley was hung like a horse!"How on earth were you so unlucky in love?" Jenna exclaimed."Mostly the ladies deserted me long before I even reached the bedchamber," he mumbled."Well I'm not deserting you." She wrapped her lips around his cock head and swirled her tongue for a bit before plunging all the way down his shaft. He emitted a deep and low groan.Jenna slowly bobbed her head along his shaft over and over, with her hands grabbing his thighs for support. He moaned in pleasure with each and every stroke of her soft and warm mouth."Oh dear God," he whimpered. "Your mouth. It feels amazing."It was clear that poor John Wesley had never experienced a blowjob before, not in life, nor the afterlife, and Jenna instantly felt very generous to be giving him this incredible gift. His breathing was erratic, and she sensed that he had already reached a point of near-climax, and was doing everything he could to fight it off.Jenna's expert mouth slowly bobbed up and down his shaft. She then paused at the bottom and held his huge shaft completely inside her mouth, all the way to the back of her throat. She reached through his legs, grabbed his arse, and pulled him toward her in an attempt to get him even deeper into her throat."Uh!" he moaned. "I'm not going to last much longer. I fear I shall spend!"Outside the vestry, Reverend Ewing paced back and forth, wondering what the strange groaning noises were all about."The hell is going' on in there?" She said out loud.Jenna slowly slid her mouth back over his shaft and removed him from her mouth. She wore the naughtiest smile, and John could tell she was thoroughly enjoying this as much as he was. She took his cock into her mouth once more and slid her tongue back and forth along the underside of his shaft. He responded with another moan, louder and more urgent than before. She removed him once again from her mouth and looked toward him with a smile. the faint silver light surrounding John was more radiant than before."Are you ready to spend?" She asked, looking up at him from her knees. John was so overwhelmed, he couldn't speak. He simply nodded his head and grunted."Then I want you to come for me," she said. With that, she slid his wet cock back into her mouth. Once again she reached through his legs to grab his arse and pull him toward her, and she began to furiously fuck him with her mouth. He placed his hands on the back of her head and thrust himself into her mouth, over and over, filling the vestry with the wet sound of fellation.Jenna began moaning, and her muffled moans seemed to push John over the edge. With her mouth still filled with his cock, he stopped his thrusting and gave a loud groan. His body tensed and shook, and Jenna did everything she could to swallow his massive load, but it was too much. Some of his thick cum leaked from the corner of her mouth and splashed down the front of her pink top."Ah!" John sighed, his eyes closed in ecstasy. Thoroughly satisfied, he cried out in joy. "Thank you! Thank you so much!"Pleased to have completely drained him, she removed his cock from her mouth. His cum was delicious. Ghost cum tasted just as good as that from a living man.All at once, a pillar of light surrounded John."Ah! I'm free once more! You've freed me Jenna! I can't thank you enough! I can return and be at peace!" He began to rise up into the air. "I hope we shall meet again sometime! Farewell and God bless!"Jenna stood up and wiped her lips. "Godspeed, John! Oh! Just one more thing, next time you visit, can you bring your brother Charles along?"Reverend Ewing was about to knock on the vestry door, when it suddenly opened."Oh! Is everything alright?""Everything's fine. You can reopen your church. John's spirit is at peace once more.""For sure? He's really gone? But how?""I just said a prayer for him. Told him how much his teaching continues to inspire people to this day. That seemed to satisfy him and he just faded away.""Well thank you so much, Jenna," the reverend said, shaking her hand. "I'm so glad it's all over. It was really stressing me out! and I'm so happy that John is at peace in the Lord's kingdom again. Oh, what's that on your clothing?"Jenna looked down and was mortified at the huge globs of cum. "Oh dear. It's, candle wax. I didn't realize it had spilled. I must get going now, Reverend Ewing. Simon is waiting in the car and he'll be getting worried.""Of course. Thank you again, and give my regards to Simon!"When she'd gone, Reverend Ewing looked round the vestry. "Hmm, strange. There are no candles in here."The lecherous church warden meets his match.After peace was restored to Oakwood Road Methodist Church, and the spirit of John Wesley successfully liberated, Jenna and Reverend Morris turned their attentions to this weekend's Remembrance Sunday service. This was always a major event, and the people would be crammed into St. Michael's like sardines."I've finally completed this special sermon," Reverend Morris said, handing Jenna his iPad. "Have a read and tell me what you think. I included your suggestions about the importance of teaching the younger generation about those who died in wars. Also the bit about Winston Churchill being a flawed figure. Good suggestion, that. As human beings we are all flawed in some way.""It looks fantastic. Let me grab a coffee and settle down to enjoy this!""I hope it won't come across as too boring. You know I always get paranoid about my sermons. So many churchgoers dread a long sermon!""Your sermons are always fun and relevant, Simon, You're too hard on yourself."The mild-mannered vicar smiled. "Aww, thanks! Oh and I hope Norman Winstanley behaves himself this weekend. I had to have a quiet word with him during the Wednesday morning service.""The new churchwarden? What's he done wrong?""Well, as you know, he took over from dear old Albert who died last month. He'd previously been at St. John's, but sadly, that church has closed for good and is being demolished. Such a shame. It was a great church back in the day.""Very sad when a church dies. What are they building in its place?" Jenna asked."An Aldi supermarket. Anyways, about Norman. He's sixty-five and a terrible lecher, to put it plainly. Some say he's Sid James and Benny Hill cranked up to eleven. He didn't get nicknamed Carry On Norm for nothing."Jenna was immediately intrigued. How come I've never noticed this guy before? She thought. "Ooh. So he likes to ogle young women does he?""Yes, but not just young! I've seen him staring at the legs of older women too. Last Sunday, I caught him perving at Mrs. Wilcox when she was doing the flower arranging. And she's about eighty! Though I admit, she does have nice legs, for someone er, so mature.""Naughty boy. At least he's not ageist." Jenna said. "He needs to get on OnlyFans."Reverend Morris couldn't help but laugh. "You always try to see the best in everyone! Well just looking is one thing, but Norman has built up a bit of a reputation for being a qualified pincher of bottoms. I won't tolerate that sort of behavior. It's completely unacceptable. I'm surprised he's avoided getting into more trouble, to be honest.""Is he married?""No, widowed. Took early retirement too. Has far too much time on his hands. And we all know that the Devil makes work for idle hands, ""So true," Jenna nodded. "He makes bottoms for idle hands to pinch. "I don't think I've seen Norman. What does he look like?""Well he wears glasses and he's the spitting image of Frank Carson."Jenna blinked. "Who?""Heh, I keep forgetting the age gap between us. Frank was a Northern Irish comedian. He's dead now. My dad was and still is a massive fan of him. He used to go and see him on stage at Blackpool in the 1990s." Reverend Morris looked up a picture of the comedian on his phone and showed it to her."Ok. I'll keep an eye out for Norman this Sunday!""If he tries anything with you, tell me at once!""Oh don't worry. He wouldn't dare," Jenna replied, smirking to herself, an idea already forming in her mind. Naughty Norman. I can't have a churchwarden with wandering hands threatening Simon's church. I'd better get my hands on him before he causes any more trouble!As expected, the Sunday service was very well-attended. Jenna had arrived early, as she wanted to sit in a specific place right in the front pew. She chose to sit on the left side, in front of the organ. She'd chosen this spot because it was semi-hidden, due to a convenient pillar. More importantly, Norman the churchwarden would soon be standing here, just a few feet away, ready to direct people when it was time to take communion. For Remembrance Sunday, Jenna had chosen a smart, but conservative black dress and a silk scarf featuring a poppy pattern. She was wearing two paper poppy badges, and one of them was in a very intimate place."I hope this isn't disrespectful to the war dead," she thought to herself as she crossed her legs. "But it's necessary. This is for the good of the church's reputation. Very helpful that these self-adhesive poppy badges exist now. I just hope it doesn't drop off, "Before long, Norman Winstanley appeared and Jenna recognized him at once. Her husband's Frank Carson description had been spot on. The guy looked just like him. A full head of white hair, glasses and bushy eyebrows. A stocky build, with a beer gut. Norman looked very smart. He was wearing a dark grey suit with white shirt and maroon tie. He had big hairy hands. Jenna wondered if other parts of his body were hairy."Ah, that's him. Mr. Wandering Hands Winstanley," she said to herself. She should've been repulsed by this randy old boomer, like most women her age would be, but as usual, she found herself lusting after him and getting wet."I wonder if he wears y-fronts like Gordon? He looks the type." Of all the different types of underwear she'd seen men of this church wearing, y-fronts and boxer shorts were her favorite.Norman stood in his usual place, ready to direct the lost sheep, as he termed the congregation, to the pews, and then out again, when called for communion. St. Michael's had an efficient system whereby the congregation, one pew at a time, went up for communion, walked in a circle round the church and back to their seat. This system had been introduced during the pandemic, but had proved so successful, it had been kept on.Suddenly, the strains of the organ interrupted the quietness of the church, as Gordon began playing the opening hymn, O God Our Help in Ages Past.Everyone dutifully stood up, and it was then that Jenna caught Norman's eye. She noticed him staring and winked at him. He winked back at her. Immediately, she knew she had his full, undivided attention.Who's that tasty little filly? Norman thought. I haven't seen her before. Mind you, I've only been helping out here a week. Not many young lasses in this church. She's a pretty one. Mmm, I'd like to goose her!Look at him, undressing me with his eyes, Jenna smirked. Oh he's horny all right. I think he needs a lot more than a butt cheek to pinch. I bet his balls are as blue as a Smurf's arse.The hymn finished, and everyone sat down, as Reverend Morris began the usual start of the morning Eucharist."A very blessed welcome to all who have joined us today, for this, our special Remembrance Sunday service. We are gathered here today to reflect on those who gave their lives in the service of this country. At the same time, we reflect on those who are currently enduring the horrors of war. The people of Ukraine, Syria and Afghanistan. Let us pray, "Jenna bowed her head. At the same time, she crossed her legs and slid her dress up, exposing some creamy white thigh. Norman's eyes almost popped out of his head. She was sure she heard him utter a noise, rather like the whinny of a horse. At the same time, Gordon peered over the top of the organ, waiting for his cue to start playing the Gloria in Excelsis. His elevated position afforded him a perfect view of Jenna, when he spotted her sitting right at the front. He assumed she'd chosen to sit there for his benefit."Venus herself," he muttered, gazing at her flawless legs and remembering the last time they'd been wrapped round his body at the vicarage social. He felt his cock starting to throb. "God she makes me feel glad that I was born a man!"A cough brought him to his senses. Josh the curate was desperately trying to attract his attention as discreetly as possible."Oh, sorry!" Gordon whispered, fumbling with his music sheets. He started playing the Gloria.Jenna was getting excited just thinking about flashing her white panties. Her nipples were already erect and hard and she could feel that familiar warm, moist sensation between her legs. Slowly, she slid her dress up higher and uncrossed her legs, doing so in such a way that it was impossible to avoid a panty flash. She looked at Norman and raised an eyebrow. He let out an audible gasp and his face flushed a shade of red that looked as if his blood pressure had reached stroke-inducing levels. Fumbling in his pocket, he grabbed a handkerchief and wiped his face. Jenna noticed how his forehead and upper lip were glistening with sweat.No-Nut November might be a thing, but not in my world, Jenna thought. At this rate, poor Norman will have collapsed before I even get to unzip him. He was looking at her again and she noticed his bulge in his trousers that he tried covering with crossed hands. Communion was rapidly approaching, and in the middle of the offertory hymn, Norman suddenly rushed off to the gents. When he returned a few minutes later, Jenna noticed his flies were unzipped. She wondered whether he'd done this deliberately or forgotten to zip up after having a pee or a wank."So you want to play do you?" Jenna whispered and winked at him.Norman was holding an order of service booklet, and deliberately dropped it. As he squatted down to pick it up, the gap in his unzipped trousers widened, allowing Jenna a glimpse of his underwear. She was thrilled to have a peek at his pale blue y-fronts and the bulge contained within."Very nice!" She mouthed to him and blew a discreet kiss.It was time to take communion, and being sat at the front, Jenna had to go first. Calmly, she rose from the pew and walked past the organ. As she did, the poppy pinned to her dress fell out."Oh dear, she said, and bent down to pick it up. As she did, she ensured her dress rose up, revealing a flash of her panties. However it was Gordon who got the full eyeful. He leant over for a better look, and clumsily knocked a load of music books off the shelf at the side of the organ."Damn and blast it," he muttered, scrambling to pick them up.Jenna took communion and walked round the church and down the side aisle. As she approached her pew, Norman "helpfully" held out his hand to direct her, and she took the opportunity to squeeze past him. As she did, she felt a hand cup her right buttock and give a little pinch."You're a dirty old man, Mr. Winstanley," she said. "Luckily for you, I happen to be a dirty young woman." Quick as a whip, she slid her hand to his crotch and groped his bulge through his unzipped trousers."Ah, oh!" Norman jolted in surprise. Jenna sat down and smiled at him."I want to see more. Do you?"His nostrils flared, and he quickly backed off, squirming with arousal and bewilderment. Jenna wondered if she'd scared him off, but as the organ music resumed and communion ended, she saw him grab the order of service booklet again and hold it sideways against his crotch. Wondering where this would lead, she was ready to play. It was much more fun than her doing all the flashing. She raised her leg and slid a finger across her panties, pulling the material to the side, giving him a peek at her pubic hair.Norman felt like he was going to cum in his underpants, if this continued. His face was red and his breathing was shallow. He wondered just how much longer he could hold on, but hold on he did. This cheeky little filly was unlike any other woman he'd ever encountered. A wiser, less lecherous man would've backed off long ago, in this age of Me Too, mindful that he could be being led into a trap. But Norman was a shameless, seasoned groper and letch, and he wasn't going to back down now. Using the booklet to shield his crotch from other members of the congregation, a swift movement of his left hand freed his cock, and the top of it poked out from his blue underpants.Not looking down at himself, not acknowledging that his erect dick was visible, the churchwarden acted as if everything was normal. Jenna couldn't stop staring at his cock. It was more ram rod than sham rod. She licked her lips and made a gesture to him with a clenched fist moving up and down.What a delicious-looking cock he has! She was practically drooling like a dog in heat, in the same way he was drooling at the sight of her pubic bush. And speaking of which, she hiked up her dress and revealed the front of her panties. Attached to them was another paper poppy.Norman's jaw dropped.At the same time, Gordon craned his neck to peer over the top of the organ again and got a grandstand view of Jenna's poppy."Holy shit!" He spluttered. He quickly sat down on the stool, but not before knocking his books over a second time.Further along the front pew, sat four old ladies all in their nineties, notorious gossips of the church."I say Margaret, I think the organist is drunk. He's not quite himself. He was dreadfully out of time when he played the Gloria!""Well really. It's disgraceful. On Remembrance Sunday of all days. Oh my good gracious, Mavis! Look at that! The churchwarden's flies are undone!"Immediately, the four of them leant forward in unison to get a better look."Heaven's above, you can see his, concern! How shocking! Somebody should tell him!""Maud, it's times like this that I really envy the youth. They have those fancy telephones that take instant photos.""The last time I saw a man in such a state was in 1943, and I'd just turned eighteen. Those American G I blokes, such good times!"Jenna couldn't wait any longer. The service wouldn't end for another ten minutes. Removing the poppy from her panties, she adjusted her dress and rose from the pew. "Join me in the gents," she whispered, and pressed the poppy into Norman's hand. "Lest we forget!"Norman just nodded, stunned. He glanced down at the poppy. My God, what a precious object. He would treasure it forever. Carefully placing it in his shirt pocket, he zipped up his trousers and discreetly made his way to the toilets at the front of the church.The gents toilets were empty, and Jenna made her way past the row of urinals and into the end cubicle. Moments later, she heard the door open and Norman entered. He nervously glanced round."Pist, in here!" Jenna said, ushering him inside. She locked the cubicle door and closed the toilet lid."Who are you?" Norman spluttered. "You're a cunning little vixen! I want to take handfuls of you, you're amazing! You've got me well and truly foxed!""My name is Jenna," she replied. "And you're Norman, yes? Our new churchwarden?"He nodded."If you don't mind," she said looking up at him with lust-filled eyes, "I'd love to suck that hard cock of yours."Norman looked like all his Christmases and birthdays had come at once. "Oh Jenna, I'd love for you to suck me," he sighed. "I'd love to cum in your mouth. I'd love to watch you swallow all of my thick cum!"Jenna sat down on the toilet and unzipped his trousers, then unbuckled his belt. Wanting full, unobstructed access to the churchwarden's member, she pulled his trousers and y-fronts down to his ankles. Norman said nothing, he simply stood there, watching her work her magic. He never once wondered why such a young and attractive woman would want to suck his cock so willingly. It had been years, decades even, since a woman had wanted to pleasure him! He was actually getting a blowjob from a stunning redhead, for free!""What a lovely cock you've got, Norman. I could see how big it was when you gave me that cheeky little glimpse of it in the church service earlier!" She wasn't lying. He did indeed have a nice plump shaft, with big balls, and wiry white pubes."Some men are like fine wine, they get better with age!"Without hesitation, she impaled her mouth on his shaft. Taking him deep while stroking him, licking him, and sucking him. Norman put his hand on the back of Jenna's head.Jenna cupped his balls, feeling them throb and pulsate, she knew precisely when he was about to cum. At the same time, she ran her other hand up under his shirt, feeling his hairy paunch."That tickles!" Norman murmured, sighing and groaning.Back in the church, the service had nearly ended, much to Gordon's relief. He really needed a pee. Thanks to Jenna, he needed a wank too, but there wasn't time. Whilst the vicar was reading out a lot of notices, he had just enough time to pop to the gents, relieve himself and head back to the organ to play the recessional hymn."Mmm," Jenna murmured, her mouth full of cock. Suddenly, Norman heard someone else enter the toilets."Jenna, someone's come in!" He whispered."Mmm," was all she could reply, and continued sucking him.Gordon hurried to a urinal and unzipped his trousers. As he began to pee, a loud groan came from the end cubicle. He ignored it and continued relieving himself. The mystery bloke in the cubicle made several loud grunts. Gordon glanced round. "Bloody hell," he muttered. "That poor sod's got a bad case of constipation."He finished, zipped up, washed his hands and hurried out of the toilets, wondering who the unfortunate man was."Oh, Oh fuck!" Norman groaned, as his climax neared. "Jenna! I'm going to give you a lovely, big creamy surprise!""Give it to me, Norman!" She felt his cock quiver and his balls tightened in her hand and she got her first taste of his cum. Jet after jet of his thick seed squirted from his cock into Jenna's eager mouth. He took out his cock to allow her to swallow his load and, as she was doing so, he stroked it and managed to squirt a few more sticky blasts all over her face."Ah," Norman panted. "That was wonderful Jenna, I enjoyed that more than anything. I hope it was as enjoyable for you as it was for me! Did you like all my cum in that sweet mouth of yours?""Oh I loved that! Your cum tastes so good, Norman!" Jenna lowered her head and planted a kiss on his cock and then on his sweaty, hairy balls. Doing a dreadful attempt at a Northern Irish accent, she added, "It's the way you tell 'em!""Eh?" Norman said."My poor attempt at a Frank Carson impression," she replied. "My husband said you resemble him.""You, you're married?""Yes," Jenna said, standing up. "I'm the vicar's wife."A look of horror appeared on Norman's face. "Oh my God, ""Don't look so worried, Norman." She put her finger to his lips. "Our little secret, yes? Of course, you need to behave yourself from now on. A little birdy told me that you are quite liberal with those wandering hands of yours. No more bum pinching and goosing of any other ladies whilst you're in St. Michael's, is that understood?"He nodded, panic in his eyes."Say it out loud, in God's name. Because God knows everything.""In the name of God, I promise I'll keep my hands to myself," Norman said."That's my Norm," she replied, planting a kiss on his lips. "We'd better get out of here. Other chaps will be coming in. You go first.""R-right. Okay." Norman zipped up his trousers, fastened his belt, composed himself and hurried out of the cubicle. He opened the door and glanced round."There's no-one here. Quick, you dash into the ladies."Jenna ran past him. As she did, she pinched his arse. "Until next time then," she giggled.Norman breathed a sigh of relief and opened the main door that led back into the church. The service had ended and people were starting to file out of the pews. Norman wiped his forehead. His mind was spinning. Not looking where he was going, he almost walked into Gordon, who'd seen him leaving the toilets."Sorry," he muttered."No worries," Gordon replied. "Listen, there's a first aid kit and other medicine in the vestry. I can get you some Dulcolax tablets."Norman looked confused. "What?""No need to be embarrassed. All us older blokes get constipated from time to time. I couldn't help but overhear you in the gents earlier, and you seemed to be in bloody agony with your bowels!"To be continued.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

 Her Mentula Cōleī BaptismA Series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Christmas was fast approaching, and festive events were in full swing at St. Michael's Church."Well not long to go until Jesus' birthday," Reverend Morris smiled as he and Jenna finished putting up their Christmas decorations. "Just two weeks. Which reminds me, there's another very special person's birthday a week before the festive season, ""Oh yes. I'd forgotten!" Jenna replied."Jenna my love, it's your 21st! You can't forget something like that. I want it to be a truly memorable birthday for you. Is there anything in particular you'd really, really like? Please give it some thought. Turning 21 is a milestone.""I will Simon. But I pretty much have everything I've ever wanted already," she smiled, slipping her arms round him.Later, Jenna was engrossed in reading something on her smartphone."Imagine that," she whispered to herself.Noticing her excitement, Reverend Morris became curious."What's grabbed your attention, Jen?"" Mentula Cōleī Baptism," she blurted out, without thinking.Her husband looked confused. "Pardon?""Oh! It's nothing. Just an old fertility rite of the Eastern Orthodox, in some Asian nations! The Japanese call it bukkake. The loose translation of ‘Mentula Cōleī'  is ‘cock & balls'. And it follows the Anglican tradition of sprinkling. Er, would you like a cup of tea?”"Sure."Later, when Jenna was having a shower, Reverend Morris picked up his phone. "Bukkake, she said. How does one spell that, then?" He typed into the browser. Boocaka? Bookaki? Bukacay? On the third attempt, the browser's autocorrect suggested the correct term."Oh, so that's how it's spelt. He clicked on a Wikipedia link. "Good God!" He spluttered, as he read all about the act. When he'd finished, he chuckled to himself. "You learn something new every day. The Internet never disappoints, "At the Wednesday Eucharist, Gordon had just finished the recessional hymn. The midweek service always had a lower turnout than the Sunday service, but numbers had been steadily increasing all year."Morning Gordon," Reverend Morris said, appearing at the side of the organ."Oh hello vicar," the organist replied. "Quite full today. I don't know, the news says that Christianity is declining in this country but this church seems to be the exception.""It does, and that pleases me greatly. I can't speak for all churches in England, but knowing that our community here at St. Michael's is thriving, well it lifts my heart. I tend not to pay much attention to the news these days. Too depressing. Difficult times for so many. Strikes, cost of living and all that. Oh and England getting knocked out of the World Cup.""Mmm, yes," Gordon nodded. "Couldn't care less about football. I never watch it. Horse racing is my thing. How's Jenna and Christopher?""Oh they're both fine, actually I need to discuss something important with you, Gordon. Jenna's 21st birthday is next week. I was wondering if you could help me with something?""Certainly, vicar!" He replied, switching off the light above the organ's keyboards. "Happy to help in any way I can.""Okay, but not here. Come to my study right now, please.""Right you are," Gordon said. He didn't even have time to remove his robe and hang it up in the vestry. He was intrigued. The way the vicar was summoning him to the study sounded a bit ominous. He felt like a kid at school being summoned to the headmaster in order to receive a punishment. He meekly followed the vicar down the aisle."Close the door if you please," Reverend Morris said, as he beckoned the organist into the study. Gordon did as he asked, and was surprised to find Josh the curate, Father Aiden, Bishop George and Norman Winstanley the new churchwarden all waiting."Eh, what's all this, vicar?" Gordon exclaimed. "A lads-only party?""Gentlemen," Reverend Morris began. "I've invited you here because you are trusted spiritual mentors; and trusted friends of mine. As servants of God, you all have your own important tasks to perform. Now what I am about to ask you, requires a great deal of trust. As good Christians, I wonder if you'll be able to fulfil this very unique anointing ceremony a parishioner has requested."Father Aiden crossed himself. "I am always ready to do the Lord's work.""Me too," Gordon said. "And if there's free beer included, well that's a bonus!""Well this task concerns Jenna, my wife."The men in the study all fell silent. There was a great deal of shuffling feet and awkward coughs!One week later,"Where are we going, Simon?" Jenna asked, as he got into the car. She assumed they were going to a restaurant."The church. Just a little birthday surprise."When they arrived, Reverend Morris requested that Jenna close her eyes."Absolutely no peeking!" He said as he led her down the aisle."This is so exciting!" Jenna said. "Let me guess, the whole congregation of St. Michael's are going to leap out and yell Happy Birthday, right?""Close, but no cigar!" The vicar replied. "Now, just sit on this stool, "Father Aiden was driving down the high street, on his way to St. Michael's Church. His heart was pounding like crazy."I can't believe I agreed to take part in this," he mumbled to himself. "Lord in heaven, why am I doing this? Haven't I sinned enough already?"He fiddled with the car radio. Most of the stations were planning Christmas songs 24/7 now. Chris's Rea's Driving Home for Christmas started playing. This was the third time today he'd heard this song. Passing a Tesco Express store, Father Aiden decided he needed some Dutch courage before he could partake in the special "celebration" at the church. A cheap bottle of whiskey or gin would suffice. Parking up, he hurried into the store and walked straight into a woman who was loaded up with shopping."I'm so sorry!" He exclaimed, picking up the tube of gift wrap she'd dropped."Aiden?"He froze and looked up. "Róisín?""My God! It is you! I can't believe it!" the red-haired woman gasped."W-what are you doing in this neck of the woods?" Father Aiden said. "Did you leave Liverpool?""Sure did. I've jumped ship. I'm at the Living Earth Free Church now and I'm loving every minute. I've become a vicar, well they call us leaders. It suits me just fine. What about you, are you still with the Catholic Church?"The priest looked awkwardly at her. "Erm, sort of. I've been fighting a conflict with myself these past couple of weeks."Róisín smiled at him. "You think your future lies elsewhere?"He took a deep breath. "Maybe?"She put down her shopping bags and took his hand. "I've never stopped thinking about you, Aiden. I know you broke things off because you couldn't break your celibacy vows, ""Oh but that's the thing. I fled Liverpool and moved to this town, and the first thing I did was to break my celibacy vows, "Róisín's face fell. "Oh, so you've met someone?""Uh, No. It was just a, one-off. But it made me think that I'm just not cut out for a celibate life. And because of that, I can't continue in my current profession.""Well you're too attractive for that."A blush spread across the priest's face. "Would you like to go for a drink?""Thought you'd never ask! Let me dump this stuff in the car and then I'm all yours!""Sorry Jenna," Father Aiden said to himself as he slipped his arm around Róisín and they strolled into the town center. "But I'm sure you'll have fun without me. Thanks for helping me see the light though."Jenna could hear muffled whisperings and several male voices. She wondered what was going to happen next. "Can I look yet?""No not yet," Reverend Morris replied. "Just a sec, " The vicar ushered Gordon, Josh, Bishop George and Norman in front of the altar, where several candles has been lit. "Where's Father Aiden?""Guess he chickened out?" Gordon muttered. "Maybe he's in a confession booth? Ha-ha!""Oh well, fair enough. It was a lot to ask, Okay Jenna, you can open your eyes now!"Jenna opened her eyes, to see the organist, the curate, the Bishop, and the churchwarden all stood round her. Gordon was wearing his best suit and the black robe he wore when playing the organ, andJosh was wearing his cassock and surplice."Oh my. Good evening, boys!" She said. "Are you all here to wish me Happy Birthday?""We certainly are," Gordon grinned, rubbing his crotch. "We're here to give you the most memorable birthday ever, eh chaps? As it's a special one, and you're a very special lass, Jenna!""Aww, you're all so sweet," Jenna replied, still not aware of what was about to happen. "I love being part of this church.""And you've brought so much happiness to it," Reverend Morris said. Now it's time for us to repay your kindness." He nodded at Gordon and the others. "Now don't keep my lovely wife waiting, she's eager to be baptized!""Huh?" Jenna blinked. "Baptized?"Gordon volunteered to go first. He unzipped his trousers and pulled out his cock. "Come on lads, don't be shy, eh?" Seconds later, Josh and Bishop George did the same. Norman hesitated a moment, but finally followed suit and unzipped. Jenna's mouth dropped in amazement as four delicious erect cocks were pointed right at her. She was too stunned to speak, and turned to Reverend Morris, who was standing back from the others, and also wearing church vestments."This is our 21st birthday present to you," the vicar said. "A Mentula Cōleī Baptism." It's been part of early Assyrian Christian marriage ceremonies in Asia, to anoint a young bride's womb, before the couple consummates. The church elders would meet with the couple after the public ceremony vows, to anoint the virgin."Oh, my, God" Jenna gasped. "Simon, how?"The reverend simply put his hands together, as though in prayer. "I asked God for help in getting you the perfect present. He knows everything, you see. I'm just sorry that Father Aiden decided to opt out, and unfortunately the Archbishop of Canterbury was unavailable as he's currently in Ukraine. John Wesley's ghost, well one cannot book a last-minute appointment with the dead, alas. But I hope those of us that are here will satisfy you?"Jenna licked her lips. "Hell yes!" She knelt down before them. "Oh Gordon, I see you've got an organ pipe that needs blowing," she said as she pulled down his trousers and briefs and squeezed his erection. "Let's see if you can hit the right notes.""I always hit the right notes," he chuckled. "Especially when you're playing my instrument, ""Umm. You're an organist who always entertains," she commented as she lowered her mouth over the end of his cock.Jenna sucked on the head, tasting him as she ran her tongue over the sensitive opening, while pumping the shaft with her hand. She took more and more of his hardness into her mouth until she felt him hit the back of her throat. She relaxed and pushed on until she had his whole member in her mouth and she was nuzzling his silvery pubic hair. He groaned as he grabbed the back of her head and thrust into her mouth.Reverend Morris watched in admiration and amazement as his wife expertly sucked the organist's cock. Gordon was quite well-endowed, but that was no challenge to Jenna. Seeing her pleasuring another man like this had got him as hard as a rock. He massaged his erection through his cassock and surplice. Could she cope with more than one man though?Josh was growing impatient, and his cock was desperate for attention. "Fancy trying some younger meat, Jenna? I think you've fully re-tuned the organist's organ.""Don't rush the lass," Gordon sighed. "Wait your turn, lad!""I'm sure you can't wait to taste it," he said as he pushed his throbbing shaft in her face.Jenna didn't hesitate, she removed Gordon's cock and Josh pushed his erection deep into her mouth. He grabbed her head and she began sucking him hard."Oh yeah! Praise the Lord! Oh I'm coming!""So soon?" Gordon chuckled. You younger fellas have no endurance!""Now now, enough of that," Jenna said. Play nice." She unbuttoned her blouse, exposing her pert breasts. "Mmm, give me some cum, Josh!"The sight of her tits pushed the curate over the edge and he erupted, glazing them with his hot seed."So delicious! Thanks so much Josh. What an impressive load. No longer shy I see! Like I said, you'll make one hell of a vicar one day!" Jenna felt an intense tingling sensation of arousal and a moistening in her pussy. The crotch of her panties turned a darker shade of red as her nectar seeped out of her and soaked them. Reaching under her skirt, she began fingering herself."We vicars produce more cum, right?" Reverend Morris chuckled, jacking off in the background."Hell yes.""Organists produce a lot too," Gordon interrupted. "Oh fuck, now I'm coming, Jenna, .oh!"Jets of creamy white cum surged forth through the air from the tip of Gor

 Her Mentula Cōleī BaptismA Series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Christmas was fast approaching, and festive events were in full swing at St. Michael's Church."Well not long to go until Jesus' birthday," Reverend Morris smiled as he and Jenna finished putting up their Christmas decorations. "Just two weeks. Which reminds me, there's another very special person's birthday a week before the festive season, ""Oh yes. I'd forgotten!" Jenna replied."Jenna my love, it's your 21st! You can't forget something like that. I want it to be a truly memorable birthday for you. Is there anything in particular you'd really, really like? Please give it some thought. Turning 21 is a milestone.""I will Simon. But I pretty much have everything I've ever wanted already," she smiled, slipping her arms round him.Later, Jenna was engrossed in reading something on her smartphone."Imagine that," she whispered to herself.Noticing her excitement, Reverend Morris became curious."What's grabbed your attention, Jen?"" Mentula Cōleī Baptism," she blurted out, without thinking.Her husband looked confused. "Pardon?""Oh! It's nothing. Just an old fertility rite of the Eastern Orthodox, in some Asian nations! The Japanese call it bukkake. The loose translation of ‘Mentula Cōleī'  is ‘cock & balls'. And it follows the Anglican tradition of sprinkling. Er, would you like a cup of tea?”"Sure."Later, when Jenna was having a shower, Reverend Morris picked up his phone. "Bukkake, she said. How does one spell that, then?" He typed into the browser. Boocaka? Bookaki? Bukacay? On the third attempt, the browser's autocorrect suggested the correct term."Oh, so that's how it's spelt. He clicked on a Wikipedia link. "Good God!" He spluttered, as he read all about the act. When he'd finished, he chuckled to himself. "You learn something new every day. The Internet never disappoints, "At the Wednesday Eucharist, Gordon had just finished the recessional hymn. The midweek service always had a lower turnout than the Sunday service, but numbers had been steadily increasing all year."Morning Gordon," Reverend Morris said, appearing at the side of the organ."Oh hello vicar," the organist replied. "Quite full today. I don't know, the news says that Christianity is declining in this country but this church seems to be the exception.""It does, and that pleases me greatly. I can't speak for all churches in England, but knowing that our community here at St. Michael's is thriving, well it lifts my heart. I tend not to pay much attention to the news these days. Too depressing. Difficult times for so many. Strikes, cost of living and all that. Oh and England getting knocked out of the World Cup.""Mmm, yes," Gordon nodded. "Couldn't care less about football. I never watch it. Horse racing is my thing. How's Jenna and Christopher?""Oh they're both fine, actually I need to discuss something important with you, Gordon. Jenna's 21st birthday is next week. I was wondering if you could help me with something?""Certainly, vicar!" He replied, switching off the light above the organ's keyboards. "Happy to help in any way I can.""Okay, but not here. Come to my study right now, please.""Right you are," Gordon said. He didn't even have time to remove his robe and hang it up in the vestry. He was intrigued. The way the vicar was summoning him to the study sounded a bit ominous. He felt like a kid at school being summoned to the headmaster in order to receive a punishment. He meekly followed the vicar down the aisle."Close the door if you please," Reverend Morris said, as he beckoned the organist into the study. Gordon did as he asked, and was surprised to find Josh the curate, Father Aiden, Bishop George and Norman Winstanley the new churchwarden all waiting."Eh, what's all this, vicar?" Gordon exclaimed. "A lads-only party?""Gentlemen," Reverend Morris began. "I've invited you here because you are trusted spiritual mentors; and trusted friends of mine. As servants of God, you all have your own important tasks to perform. Now what I am about to ask you, requires a great deal of trust. As good Christians, I wonder if you'll be able to fulfil this very unique anointing ceremony a parishioner has requested."Father Aiden crossed himself. "I am always ready to do the Lord's work.""Me too," Gordon said. "And if there's free beer included, well that's a bonus!""Well this task concerns Jenna, my wife."The men in the study all fell silent. There was a great deal of shuffling feet and awkward coughs!One week later,"Where are we going, Simon?" Jenna asked, as he got into the car. She assumed they were going to a restaurant."The church. Just a little birthday surprise."When they arrived, Reverend Morris requested that Jenna close her eyes."Absolutely no peeking!" He said as he led her down the aisle."This is so exciting!" Jenna said. "Let me guess, the whole congregation of St. Michael's are going to leap out and yell Happy Birthday, right?""Close, but no cigar!" The vicar replied. "Now, just sit on this stool, "Father Aiden was driving down the high street, on his way to St. Michael's Church. His heart was pounding like crazy."I can't believe I agreed to take part in this," he mumbled to himself. "Lord in heaven, why am I doing this? Haven't I sinned enough already?"He fiddled with the car radio. Most of the stations were planning Christmas songs 24/7 now. Chris's Rea's Driving Home for Christmas started playing. This was the third time today he'd heard this song. Passing a Tesco Express store, Father Aiden decided he needed some Dutch courage before he could partake in the special "celebration" at the church. A cheap bottle of whiskey or gin would suffice. Parking up, he hurried into the store and walked straight into a woman who was loaded up with shopping."I'm so sorry!" He exclaimed, picking up the tube of gift wrap she'd dropped."Aiden?"He froze and looked up. "Róisín?""My God! It is you! I can't believe it!" the red-haired woman gasped."W-what are you doing in this neck of the woods?" Father Aiden said. "Did you leave Liverpool?""Sure did. I've jumped ship. I'm at the Living Earth Free Church now and I'm loving every minute. I've become a vicar, well they call us leaders. It suits me just fine. What about you, are you still with the Catholic Church?"The priest looked awkwardly at her. "Erm, sort of. I've been fighting a conflict with myself these past couple of weeks."Róisín smiled at him. "You think your future lies elsewhere?"He took a deep breath. "Maybe?"She put down her shopping bags and took his hand. "I've never stopped thinking about you, Aiden. I know you broke things off because you couldn't break your celibacy vows, ""Oh but that's the thing. I fled Liverpool and moved to this town, and the first thing I did was to break my celibacy vows, "Róisín's face fell. "Oh, so you've met someone?""Uh, No. It was just a, one-off. But it made me think that I'm just not cut out for a celibate life. And because of that, I can't continue in my current profession.""Well you're too attractive for that."A blush spread across the priest's face. "Would you like to go for a drink?""Thought you'd never ask! Let me dump this stuff in the car and then I'm all yours!""Sorry Jenna," Father Aiden said to himself as he slipped his arm around Róisín and they strolled into the town center. "But I'm sure you'll have fun without me. Thanks for helping me see the light though."Jenna could hear muffled whisperings and several male voices. She wondered what was going to happen next. "Can I look yet?""No not yet," Reverend Morris replied. "Just a sec, " The vicar ushered Gordon, Josh, Bishop George and Norman in front of the altar, where several candles has been lit. "Where's Father Aiden?""Guess he chickened out?" Gordon muttered. "Maybe he's in a confession booth? Ha-ha!""Oh well, fair enough. It was a lot to ask, Okay Jenna, you can open your eyes now!"Jenna opened her eyes, to see the organist, the curate, the Bishop, and the churchwarden all stood round her. Gordon was wearing his best suit and the black robe he wore when playing the organ, andJosh was wearing his cassock and surplice."Oh my. Good evening, boys!" She said. "Are you all here to wish me Happy Birthday?""We certainly are," Gordon grinned, rubbing his crotch. "We're here to give you the most memorable birthday ever, eh chaps? As it's a special one, and you're a very special lass, Jenna!""Aww, you're all so sweet," Jenna replied, still not aware of what was about to happen. "I love being part of this church.""And you've brought so much happiness to it," Reverend Morris said. Now it's time for us to repay your kindness." He nodded at Gordon and the others. "Now don't keep my lovely wife waiting, she's eager to be baptized!""Huh?" Jenna blinked. "Baptized?"Gordon volunteered to go first. He unzipped his trousers and pulled out his cock. "Come on lads, don't be shy, eh?" Seconds later, Josh and Bishop George did the same. Norman hesitated a moment, but finally followed suit and unzipped. Jenna's mouth dropped in amazement as four delicious erect cocks were pointed right at her. She was too stunned to speak, and turned to Reverend Morris, who was standing back from the others, and also wearing church vestments."This is our 21st birthday present to you," the vicar said. "A Mentula Cōleī Baptism." It's been part of early Assyrian Christian marriage ceremonies in Asia, to anoint a young bride's womb, before the couple consummates. The church elders would meet with the couple after the public ceremony vows, to anoint the virgin."Oh, my, God" Jenna gasped. "Simon, how?"The reverend simply put his hands together, as though in prayer. "I asked God for help in getting you the perfect present. He knows everything, you see. I'm just sorry that Father Aiden decided to opt out, and unfortunately the Archbishop of Canterbury was unavailable as he's currently in Ukraine. John Wesley's ghost, well one cannot book a last-minute appointment with the dead, alas. But I hope those of us that are here will satisfy you?"Jenna licked her lips. "Hell yes!" She knelt down before them. "Oh Gordon, I see you've got an organ pipe that needs blowing," she said as she pulled down his trousers and briefs and squeezed his erection. "Let's see if you can hit the right notes.""I always hit the right notes," he chuckled. "Especially when you're playing my instrument, ""Umm. You're an organist who always entertains," she commented as she lowered her mouth over the end of his cock.Jenna sucked on the head, tasting him as she ran her tongue over the sensitive opening, while pumping the shaft with her hand. She took more and more of his hardness into her mouth until she felt him hit the back of her throat. She relaxed and pushed on until she had his whole member in her mouth and she was nuzzling his silvery pubic hair. He groaned as he grabbed the back of her head and thrust into her mouth.Reverend Morris watched in admiration and amazement as his wife expertly sucked the organist's cock. Gordon was quite well-endowed, but that was no challenge to Jenna. Seeing her pleasuring another man like this had got him as hard as a rock. He massaged his erection through his cassock and surplice. Could she cope with more than one man though?Josh was growing impatient, and his cock was desperate for attention. "Fancy trying some younger meat, Jenna? I think you've fully re-tuned the organist's organ.""Don't rush the lass," Gordon sighed. "Wait your turn, lad!""I'm sure you can't wait to taste it," he said as he pushed his throbbing shaft in her face.Jenna didn't hesitate, she removed Gordon's cock and Josh pushed his erection deep into her mouth. He grabbed her head and she began sucking him hard."Oh yeah! Praise the Lord! Oh I'm coming!""So soon?" Gordon chuckled. You younger fellas have no endurance!""Now now, enough of that," Jenna said. Play nice." She unbuttoned her blouse, exposing her pert breasts. "Mmm, give me some cum, Josh!"The sight of her tits pushed the curate over the edge and he erupted, glazing them with his hot seed."So delicious! Thanks so much Josh. What an impressive load. No longer shy I see! Like I said, you'll make one hell of a vicar one day!" Jenna felt an intense tingling sensation of arousal and a moistening in her pussy. The crotch of her panties turned a darker shade of red as her nectar seeped out of her and soaked them. Reaching under her skirt, she began fingering herself."We vicars produce more cum, right?" Reverend Morris chuckled, jacking off in the background."Hell yes.""Organists produce a lot too," Gordon interrupted. "Oh fuck, now I'm coming, Jenna, .oh!"Jets of creamy white cum surged forth through the air from the tip of Gor

Fellatio Rites for the Ghost of John Wesley By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Jenna took a deep breath as she approached Oakwood Road Methodist Church. "Are you sure you don't want me to come in with you?" Reverend Morris asked. She patted his shoulder. "I'll be fine Simon. You don't need to worry. It's the ghost of John Wesley, not Jack the Ripper. This is exciting! I hope he'll appear!" "Right, well, I'll be sat in the car then. I hope you won't be too long. Remember, just turn and run the moment you feel in any way uncomfortable." "Reverend Morris, I think you're scared!""No I'm not! I can't help being concerned for the safety of the woman I love can I? Aren't you a tiny bit nervous?" "I'm as cool as spring water," Jenna replied. "I was reading all about John Wesley last night. He was a true gentleman. I'm sure this won't take long." Reverend Morris nodded as he watched his wife enter the church. "Well if anyone can fix this, Jenna can. I don't know what she said to the Archbishop of Canterbury last week, but he changed his mind about the wall plaque faster than the Government does U-turns. I wonder what she said to him? Whatever it was, Justin Welby was impressed!" He reclined in his car seat. "I was so lucky to meet Jenna. Of course, it was God who delivered her to me. That fateful Sunday morning in the vestry, oh." Father Aiden was walking along the street. Many things were on his mind. He had some important decisions to make about his future in the priesthood. Briefly glancing up from his smartphone, his heart jumped as he spotted Jenna entering the Methodist church across the road. "Holy Mother, " he muttered. A rush of excitement swept over him as he recalled the intimate encounter he'd enjoyed a few weeks ago. It was that which had spurred him to think about his future. He quickly crossed the road. "Hello Father!" The priest almost dropped his phone. Someone was shouting at him from a parked car. "Oh, Reverend Morris. Hello there." Damn, no chance of a repeat encounter, he thought. "I've just seen your wife going into the Methodist church." "Yes, I hope she won't be long. I'm just waiting for her." "Are you alright? You look a bit anxious, if you don't mind me saying." "It's a long story, Father. I think you'd better sit down in the passenger seat and I'll tell you. You've not heard about what's been going on in Oakwood Road church have you?" The priest looked confused. "Nope. Tell me more!" He opened the car door and sat down. I could do to unburden myself too." "Okay, well, this might sound a bit weird." "I can handle anything weird," Father Aiden replied. "It's about ghosts. As a Catholic, what are your thoughts on them and have you ever seen one?" Father Aiden thought about his answer very carefully. "Hmm. In theory, billions of ghosts potentially exist because billions of human beings have "lost" their bodies through death. Strictly speaking, these disembodied souls are not ghosts because they have never become discernible to any living people. Only those few souls whose presence is seen or felt by others are truly ghosts. And their existence is real." "So you've seen one?" "Yes. Two actually. Once in Ireland when I was a child and another when I was based in Liverpool. I was called upon to rid a family's home of a troubled spirit." Reverend Morris looked relieved. "That's good to know." "The Old Testament also has a few ghost stories. The most famous one is in 1 Samuel 28:8 thru 20. Here the inspired writer tells how King Saul met with the ghost of the prophet Samuel." Father Aiden replied. "Have you seen a ghost?" "Yes. And not just any ghost, but the ghost of John Wesley! He's haunting the Methodist church. That's why I'm here. Jenna's gone in there to try and help him return to, the other side." "Oh I see, then she must, wait, what?" Father Aiden did a double take. "Thanks for coming' along Mrs. Morris," Reverend Ewing said, shaking Jenna's hand. "I know you probably think this whole thing is crazy." "Not at all! And call me Jenna. I'm a true believer. If my husband says that you and he saw John Wesley, then I know it's true. But why does John want to see me of all people?" "Your hubby mentioned that your grandma is a Methodist?" "Uh yeah. Bit of a tenuous link. Like Sir Henry Barrington-Smythe's horse." "Huh?" "Oh, never mind. Figure of speech." "You Brits and your little quirks!" Reverend Ewing laughed. "I'm still getting used to 'em!" "You said John usually appears in the vestry?" "Uh-huh. Can be anywhere in the church, but he seems to like the vestry best." "Right, well go and wait in there and say a few prayers, and see if he appears. I'm not sure I can do anything, but I'll try my best." Jenna entered the vestry. Everything looked perfectly normal in there. She closed the door and looked around. "It always comes back to the vestry," she smiled to herself as she recalled when she first got to know Reverend Morris. Suddenly, the row of gowns on the rail began to swing on their hangers. The temperature dropped, and Jenna rubbed her arms. "Are you there, John?" She called out. "Yes." She spun round. There was no sign of the spirit. "Hey, come on, show yourself at least. It's no fun talking to the invisible man." "My sincere apologies," John replied, and slowly faded into view. For the first time, Jenna was taken aback. "My God, you really are John Wesley, " He nodded and bowed. "Bless ye, for am so honored you hath come here. If I may be so bold to say, you be a lady of great beauty my dear." "Very kind of you to say, Mr. Wesley." Jenna said. "Why are you back in the land of the living? Aren't you happy in Heaven?" "Ah yes," he began. "Happier than mortals can ever imagine. But you see, I feel compelled to return to this realm every All Hallow's Eve. I like to re-visit the places where I worshipped back when I was alive. And it was in this very place where this church now stands that I preached to crowds back in the autumn of 1778." "You've got a lot of places to visit in just one night," Jenna said. "I read all about you. You traveled all over England spreading the Word of the Lord. Plus you went to America, the colonies, when you were younger." "Indeed I did, yes. To my regret, I lingered a little too long here, for I found myself unable to return to the afterlife. The sun had started to rise, heralding All Saint's Day. Thus, I am trapped here in this church until next All Hallow's Eve. Only a tremendous release of positive energy could allow me to return before then." "Oh dear. May I ask why out of all the people in the world, you wanted to see me? What can I do? My gran is a Methodist. Is that the reason?" "No Miss Jenna. It was your aura that attracted me. It's very strong. I believe God himself must've embodied you with some sort of innate goodness that allows you to help people." "You're making me sound like some kind of saint! I assure you I'm just a regular human being. I'm not particularly gifted in anything, although I do try to be a good person, " John had a rather dreamy expression on his face. "You remind me so much of Grace Murray, a lady I loved and lost, only you be far prettier than her." It was then that Jenna had an idea. A huge grin spread across her face. She'd read all about John Wesley's life and how unlucky he'd been in love. "A tremendous release of positive energy, you say? I think I know something which may cause that!" John put his hands together. "You do? Pray, do tell, my dear." "You need to experience an orgasm. What could be more positive than that?" He blinked. "I beg your pardon?" "Oh you know, " She tried to think of a period-appropriate phrase so he'd understand. "The end act of carnal relations?" He blushed. "Oh. Miss Jenna I be a man of God. I don't see how, " Jenna sank to her knees. "Only one way to find out, John!" She paused. So he's a ghost. I've never pleasured a ghost before. Isn't he composed of just gas? He's quite cute, for someone who died in 1791! I wonder if, She reached out to touch him, and expected her hand to pass right through his body, but it didn't. He jolted at her touch. "Don't worry John. I've done this before, many times in fact. It's a great honor to be able to do it to you. I'm sure this will help you." The moment of first contact had arrived. Jenna let one hand gently glide ever so slightly over John's thigh, encased in tight black breeches. Reaching out with the other hand, she ran it over his crotch, feeling an impressive bulge. "Oh my! I feel strangely warmed yet again!" John sighed. Jenna fumbled with the buttons on his breeches, being more used to zippers. Something large and splendid lurked within. Either that or he had a Bible stuffed down there. "My God!" she gasped, as the Methodist's member was revealed. The short, slightly-built John Wesley was hung like a horse! "How on earth were you so unlucky in love?" Jenna exclaimed. "Mostly the ladies deserted me long before I even reached the bedchamber," he mumbled. "Well I'm not deserting you." She pledged.Outside the vestry, Reverend Ewing paced back and forth, wondering what the strange groaning noises were all about. "The hell is going' on in there?" She said out loud. "Ah!" John sighed, his eyes closed in ecstasy. Thoroughly satisfied, he cried out in joy. "Thank you! Thank you so much!""Ah! I'm free once more! You've freed me Jenna! I can't thank you enough! I can return and be at peace!" He began to rise up into the air. "I hope we shall meet again sometime! Farewell and God bless!" Jenna stood up and wiped her lips. "Godspeed, John! Oh! Just one more thing, next time you visit, can you bring your brother Charles along?" Reverend Ewing was about to knock on the vestry door, when it suddenly opened. "Oh! Is everything alright?" "Everything's fine. You can reopen your church. John's spirit is at peace once more." "For sure? He's really gone? But how?" "I just said a prayer for him. Told him how much his teaching continues to inspire people to this day. That seemed to satisfy him and he just faded away." "Well thank you so much, Jenna," the reverend said, shaking her hand. "I'm so glad it's all over. It was really stressing me out! and I'm so happy that John is at peace in the Lord's kingdom again. Oh, what's that on your clothing?" Jenna looked down and was mortified at the huge globs of cum. "Oh dear. It's, candle wax. I didn't realize it had spilled. I must get going now, Reverend Ewing. Simon is waiting in the car and he'll be getting worried." "Of course. Thank you again, and give my regards to Simon!" When she'd gone, Reverend Ewing looked round the vestry. "Hmm, strange. There are no candles in here." The lecherous church warden meets his match. After peace was restored to Oakwood Road Methodist Church, and the spirit of John Wesley successfully liberated, Jenna and Reverend Morris turned their attentions to this weekend's Remembrance Sunday service. This was always a major event, and the people would be crammed into St. Michael's like sardines. "I've finally completed this special sermon," Reverend Morris said, handing Jenna his iPad. "Have a read and tell me what you think. I included your suggestions about the importance of teaching the younger generation about those who died in wars. Also the bit about Winston Churchill being a flawed figure. Good suggestion, that. As human beings we are all flawed in some way." "It looks fantastic. Let me grab a coffee and settle down to enjoy this!" "I hope it won't come across as too boring. You know I always get paranoid about my sermons. So many churchgoers dread a long sermon!" "Your sermons are always fun and relevant, Simon, You're too hard on yourself." The mild-mannered vicar smiled. "Aww, thanks! Oh and I hope Norman Winstanley behaves himself this weekend. I had to have a quiet word with him during the Wednesday morning service." "The new churchwarden? What's he done wrong?" "Well, as you know, he took over from dear old Albert who died last month. He'd previously been at St. John's, but sadly, that church has closed for good and is being demolished. Such a shame. It was a great church back in the day." "Very sad when a church dies. What are they building in its place?" Jenna asked. "An Aldi supermarket. Anyways, about Norman. He's sixty-five and a terrible lecher, to put it plainly. Some say he's Sid James and Benny Hill cranked up to eleven. He didn't get nicknamed Carry On Norm for nothing." Jenna was immediately intrigued. How come I've never noticed this guy before? She thought. "Ooh. So he likes to ogle young women does he?" "Yes, but not just young! I've seen him staring at the legs of older women too. Last Sunday, I caught him perving at Mrs. Wilcox when she was doing the flower arranging. And she's about eighty! Though I admit, she does have nice legs, for someone er, so mature." "Naughty boy. At least he's not ageist." Jenna said. "He needs to get on OnlyFans." Reverend Morris couldn't help but laugh. "You always try to see the best in everyone! Well just looking is one thing, but Norman has built up a bit of a reputation for being a qualified pincher of bottoms. I won't tolerate that sort of behavior. It's completely unacceptable. I'm surprised he's avoided getting into more trouble, to be honest." "Is he married?" "No, widowed. Took early retirement too. Has far too much time on his hands. And we all know that the Devil makes work for idle hands, " "So true," Jenna nodded. "He makes bottoms for idle hands to pinch. "I don't think I've seen Norman. What does he look like?" "Well he wears glasses and he's the spitting image of Frank Carson." Jenna blinked. "Who?" "Heh, I keep forgetting the age gap between us. Frank was a Northern Irish comedian. He's dead now. My dad was and still is a massive fan of him. He used to go and see him on stage at Blackpool in the 1990s." Reverend Morris looked up a picture of the comedian on his phone and showed it to her. "Ok. I'll keep an eye out for Norman this Sunday!" "If he tries anything with you, tell me at once!" "Oh don't worry. He wouldn't dare," Jenna replied, smirking to herself, an idea already forming in her mind. Naughty Norman. I can't have a churchwarden with wandering hands threatening Simon's church. I'd better get my hands on him before he causes any more trouble! As expected, the Sunday service was very well-attended. Jenna had arrived early, as she wanted to sit in a specific place right in the front pew. She chose to sit on the left side, in front of the organ. She'd chosen this spot because it was semi-hidden, due to a convenient pillar. More importantly, Norman the churchwarden would soon be standing here, just a few feet away, ready to direct people when it was time to take communion. For Remembrance Sunday, Jenna had chosen a smart, but conservative black dress and a silk scarf featuring a poppy pattern. She was wearing two paper poppy badges, and one of them was in a very intimate place. "I hope this isn't disrespectful to the war dead," she thought to herself as she crossed her legs. "But it's necessary. This is for the good of the church's reputation. Very helpful that these self-adhesive poppy badges exist now. I just hope it doesn't drop off, " Before long, Norman Winstanley appeared and Jenna recognized him at once. Her husband's Frank Carson description had been spot on. The guy looked just like him. A full head of white hair, glasses and bushy eyebrows. A stocky build, with a beer gut. Norman looked very smart. He was wearing a dark grey suit with white shirt and maroon tie. He had big hairy hands. Jenna wondered if other parts of his body were hairy. "Ah, that's him. Mr. Wandering Hands Winstanley," she said to herself. She should've been repulsed by this randy old boomer, like most women her age would be, but as usual, she found herself lusting after him and getting wet. "I wonder if he wears y-fronts like Gordon? He looks the type." Of all the different types of underwear she'd seen men of this church wearing, y-fronts and boxer shorts were her favorite. Norman stood in his usual place, ready to direct the lost sheep, as he termed the congregation, to the pews, and then out again, when called for communion. St. Michael's had an efficient system whereby the congregation, one pew at a time, went up for communion, walked in a circle round the church and back to their seat. This system had been introduced during the pandemic, but had proved so successful, it had been kept on. Suddenly, the strains of the organ interrupted the quietness of the church, as Gordon began playing the opening hymn, O God Our Help in Ages Past. Everyone dutifully stood up, and it was then that Jenna caught Norman's eye. She noticed him staring and winked at him. He winked back at her. Immediately, she knew she had his full, undivided attention. Who's that tasty little filly? Norman thought. I haven't seen her before. Mind you, I've only been helping out here a week. Not many young lasses in this church. She's a pretty one. Mmm, I'd like to goose her! Look at him, undressing me with his eyes, Jenna smirked. Oh he's horny all right. I think he needs a lot more than a butt cheek to pinch. I bet his balls are as blue as a Smurf's arse. The hymn finished, and everyone sat down, as Reverend Morris began the usual start of the morning Eucharist. "A very blessed welcome to all who have joined us today, for this, our special Remembrance Sunday service. We are gathered here today to reflect on those who gave their lives in the service of this country. At the same time, we reflect on those who are currently enduring the horrors of war. The people of Ukraine, Syria and Afghanistan. Let us pray, " Jenna bowed her head. At the same time, she crossed her legs and slid her dress up, exposing some creamy white thigh. Norman's eyes almost popped out of his head. She was sure she heard him utter a noise, rather like the whinny of a horse. At the same time, Gordon peered over the top of the organ, waiting for his cue to start playing the Gloria in Excelsis. His elevated position afforded him a perfect view of Jenna, when he spotted her sitting right at the front. He assumed she'd chosen to sit there for his benefit. "Venus herself," he muttered, gazing at her flawless legs and remembering the last time they'd been wrapped round his body at the vicarage social. He felt his cock starting to throb. "God she makes me feel glad that I was born a man!" A cough brought him to his senses. Josh the curate was desperately trying to attract his attention as discreetly as possible. "Oh, sorry!" Gordon whispered, fumbling with his music sheets. He started playing the Gloria. Jenna was getting excited just thinking about flashing her white panties. Her nipples were already erect and hard and she could feel that familiar warm, moist sensation between her legs. Slowly, she slid her dress up higher and uncrossed her legs, doing so in such a way that it was impossible to avoid a panty flash. She looked at Norman and raised an eyebrow. He let out an audible gasp and his face flushed a shade of red that looked as if his blood pressure had reached stroke-inducing levels. Fumbling in his pocket, he grabbed a handkerchief and wiped his face. Jenna noticed how his forehead and upper lip were glistening with sweat. No-Nut November might be a thing, but not in my world, Jenna thought. At this rate, poor Norman will have collapsed before I even get to unzip him. He was looking at her again and she noticed his bulge in his trousers that he tried covering with crossed hands. Communion was rapidly approaching, and in the middle of the offertory hymn, Norman suddenly rushed off to the gents. When he returned a few minutes later, Jenna noticed his flies were unzipped. She wondered whether he'd done this deliberately or forgotten to zip up after having a pee or a wank. "So you want to play do you?" Jenna whispered and winked at him. Norman was holding an order of service booklet, and deliberately dropped it. As he squatted down to pick it up, the gap in his unzipped trousers widened, allowing Jenna a glimpse of his underwear. She was thrilled to have a peek at his pale blue y-fronts and the bulge contained within. "Very nice!" She mouthed to him and blew a discreet kiss. It was time to take communion, and being sat at the front, Jenna had to go first. Calmly, she rose from the pew and walked past the organ. As she did, the poppy pinned to her dress fell out. "Oh dear, she said, and bent down to pick it up. As she did, she ensured her dress rose up, revealing a flash of her panties. However it was Gordon who got the full eyeful. He leant over for a better look, and clumsily knocked a load of music books off the shelf at the side of the organ. "Damn and blast it," he muttered, scrambling to pick them up. Jenna took communion and walked round the church and down the side aisle. As she approached her pew, Norman "helpfully" held out his hand to direct her, and she took the opportunity to squeeze past him. As she did, she felt a hand cup her right buttock and give a little pinch. "You're a dirty old man, Mr. Winstanley," she said. "Luckily for you, I happen to be a dirty young woman." Quick as a whip, she slid her hand to his crotch and groped his bulge through his unzipped trousers. "Ah, oh!" Norman jolted in surprise. Jenna sat down and smiled at him. "I want to see more. Do you?" His nostrils flared, and he quickly backed off, squirming with arousal and bewilderment. Jenna wondered if she'd scared him off, but as the organ music resumed and communion ended, she saw him grab the order of service booklet again and hold it sideways against his crotch. Wondering where this would lead, she was ready to play. It was much more fun than her doing all the flashing. She raised her leg and slid a finger across her panties, pulling the material to the side, giving him a peek at her pubic hair. Norman felt like he was going to cum in his underpants, if this continued. His face was red and his breathing was shallow. He wondered just how much longer he could hold on, but hold on he did. This cheeky little filly was unlike any other woman he'd ever encountered. A wiser, less lecherous man would've backed off long ago, in this age of Me Too, mindful that he could be being led into a trap. But Norman was a shameless, seasoned groper and letch, and he wasn't going to back down now. Using the booklet to shield his crotch from other members of the congregation, a swift movement of his left hand freed his cock, and the top of it poked out from his blue underpants. Not looking down at himself, not acknowledging that his erect dick was visible, the churchwarden acted as if everything was normal. Jenna couldn't stop staring at his cock. It was more ram rod than sham rod. She licked her lips and made a gesture to him with a clenched fist moving up and down. What a delicious-looking cock he has! She was practically drooling like a dog in heat, in the same way he was drooling at the sight of her pubic bush. And speaking of which, she hiked up her dress and revealed the front of her panties. Attached to them was another paper poppy. Norman's jaw dropped. At the same time, Gordon craned his neck to peer over the top of the organ again and got a grandstand view of Jenna's poppy. "Holy shit!" He spluttered. He quickly sat down on the stool, but not before knocking his books over a second time. Further along the front pew, sat four old ladies all in their nineties, notorious gossips of the church. "I say Margaret, I think the organist is drunk. He's not quite himself. He was dreadfully out of time when he played the Gloria!" "Well really. It's disgraceful. On Remembrance Sunday of all days. Oh my good gracious, Mavis! Look at that! The churchwarden's flies are undone!" Immediately, the four of them leant forward in unison to get a better look. "Heaven's above, you can see his, concern! How shocking! Somebody should tell him!" "Maud, it's times like this that I really envy the youth. They have those fancy telephones that take instant photos." "The last time I saw a man in such a state was in 1943, and I'd just turned eighteen. Those American G I blokes, such good times!" Jenna couldn't wait any longer. The service wouldn't end for another ten minutes. Removing the poppy from her panties, she adjusted her dress and rose from the pew. "Join me in the gents," she whispered, and pressed the poppy into Norman's hand. "Lest we forget!" Norman just nodded, stunned. He glanced down at the poppy. My God, what a precious object. He would treasure it forever. Carefully placing it in his shirt pocket, he zipped up his trousers and discreetly made his way to the toilets at the front of the church. The gents toilets were empty, and Jenna made her way past the row of urinals and into the end cubicle. Moments later, she heard the door open and Norman entered. He nervously glanced round. "Pist, in here!" Jenna said, ushering him inside. She locked the cubicle door and closed the toilet lid. "Who are you?" Norman spluttered. "You're a cunning little vixen! I want to take handfuls of you, you're amazing! You've got me well and truly foxed!" "My name is Jenna," she replied. "And you're Norman, yes? Our new churchwarden?" He nodded. "If you don't mind," she said looking up at him with lust-filled eyes, "I'd love to suck that hard cock of yours." Norman looked like all his Christmases and birthdays had come at once. "Oh Jenna, I'd love for you to suck me," he sighed. "I'd love to cum in your mouth. I'd love to watch you swallow all of my thick cum!" Jenna sat down on the toilet and unzipped his trousers, then unbuckled his belt. Wanting full, unobstructed access to the churchwarden's member, she pulled his trousers and y-fronts down to his ankles. Norman said nothing, he simply stood there, watching her work her magic. He never once wondered why such a young and attractive woman would want to suck his cock so willingly. It had been years, decades even, since a woman had wanted to pleasure him! He was actually getting a blowjob from a stunning redhead, for free!" "What a lovely cock you've got, Norman. I could see how big it was when you gave me that cheeky little glimpse of it in the church service earlier!" She wasn't lying. He did indeed have a nice plump shaft, with big balls, and wiry white pubes. "Some men are like fine wine, they get better with age!" Without hesitation, she impaled her mouth on his shaft. Taking him deep while stroking him, licking him, and sucking him. Norman put his hand on the back of Jenna's head. Jenna cupped his balls, feeling them throb and pulsate, she knew precisely when he was about to cum. At the same time, she ran her other hand up under his shirt, feeling his hairy paunch. "That tickles!" Norman murmured, sighing and groaning. Back in the church, the service had nearly ended, much to Gordon's relief. He really needed a pee. Thanks to Jenna, he needed a wank too, but there wasn't time. Whilst the vicar was reading out a lot of notices, he had just enough time to pop to the gents, relieve himself and head back to the organ to play the recessional hymn. "Mmm," Jenna murmured, her mouth full of cock. Suddenly, Norman heard someone else enter the toilets. "Jenna, someone's come in!" He whispered. "Mmm," was all she could reply, and continued sucking him. Gordon hurried to a urinal and unzipped his trousers. As he began to pee, a loud groan came from the end cubicle. He ignored it and continued relieving himself. The mystery bloke in the cubicle made several loud grunts. Gordon glanced round. "Bloody hell," he muttered. "That poor sod's got a bad case of constipation." He finished, zipped up, washed his hands and hurried out of the toilets, wondering who the unfortunate man was. "Oh, Oh fuck!" Norman groaned, as his climax neared. "Jenna! I'm going to give you a lovely, big creamy surprise!" "Give it to me, Norman!" She felt his cock quiver and his balls tightened in her hand and she got her first taste of his cum. Jet after jet of his thick seed squirted from his cock into Jenna's eager mouth. He took out his cock to allow her to swallow his load and, as she was doing so, he stroked it and managed to squirt a few more sticky blasts all over her face. "Ah," Norman panted. "That was wonderful Jenna, I enjoyed that more than anything. I hope it was as enjoyable for you as it was for me! Did you like all my cum in that sweet mouth of yours?" "Oh I loved that! Your cum tastes so good, Norman!" Jenna lowered her head and planted a kiss on his cock and then on his sweaty, hairy balls. Doing a dreadful attempt at a Northern Irish accent, she added, "It's the way you tell 'em!" "Eh?" Norman said. "My poor attempt at a Frank Carson impression," she replied. "My husband said you resemble him." "You, you're married?" "Yes," Jenna said, standing up. "I'm the vicar's wife." A look of horror appeared on Norman's face. "Oh my God, " "Don't look so worried, Norman." She put her finger to his lips. "Our little secret, yes? Of course, you need to behave yourself from now on. A little birdy told me that you are quite liberal with those wandering hands of yours. No more bum pinching and goosing of any other ladies whilst you're in St. Michael's, is that understood?" He nodded, panic in his eyes. "Say it out loud, in God's name. Because God knows everything." "In the name of God, I promise I'll keep my hands to myself," Norman said. "That's my Norm," she replied, planting a kiss on his lips. "We'd better get out of here. Other chaps will be coming in. You go first." "R-right. Okay." Norman zipped up his trousers, fastened his belt, composed himself and hurried out of the cubicle. He opened the door and glanced round. "There's no-one here. Quick, you dash into the ladies." Jenna ran past him. As she did, she pinched his arse. "Until next time then," she giggled. Norman breathed a sigh of relief and opened the main door that led back into the church. The service had ended and people were starting to file out of the pews. Norman wiped his forehead. His mind was spinning. Not looking where he was going, he almost walked into Gordon, who'd seen him leaving the toilets. "Sorry," he muttered. "No worries," Gordon replied. "Listen, there's a first aid kit and other medicine in the vestry. I can get you some Dulcolax tablets." Norman looked confused. "What?" "No need to be embarrassed. All us older blokes get constipated from time to time. I couldn't help but overhear you in the gents earlier, and you seemed to be in bloody agony with your bowels!" To be continued. By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

Fellatio Rites for the Ghost of John Wesley By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Jenna took a deep breath as she approached Oakwood Road Methodist Church. "Are you sure you don't want me to come in with you?" Reverend Morris asked. She patted his shoulder. "I'll be fine Simon. You don't need to worry. It's the ghost of John Wesley, not Jack the Ripper. This is exciting! I hope he'll appear!" "Right, well, I'll be sat in the car then. I hope you won't be too long. Remember, just turn and run the moment you feel in any way uncomfortable." "Reverend Morris, I think you're scared!""No I'm not! I can't help being concerned for the safety of the woman I love can I? Aren't you a tiny bit nervous?" "I'm as cool as spring water," Jenna replied. "I was reading all about John Wesley last night. He was a true gentleman. I'm sure this won't take long." Reverend Morris nodded as he watched his wife enter the church. "Well if anyone can fix this, Jenna can. I don't know what she said to the Archbishop of Canterbury last week, but he changed his mind about the wall plaque faster than the Government does U-turns. I wonder what she said to him? Whatever it was, Justin Welby was impressed!" He reclined in his car seat. "I was so lucky to meet Jenna. Of course, it was God who delivered her to me. That fateful Sunday morning in the vestry, oh." Father Aiden was walking along the street. Many things were on his mind. He had some important decisions to make about his future in the priesthood. Briefly glancing up from his smartphone, his heart jumped as he spotted Jenna entering the Methodist church across the road. "Holy Mother, " he muttered. A rush of excitement swept over him as he recalled the intimate encounter he'd enjoyed a few weeks ago. It was that which had spurred him to think about his future. He quickly crossed the road. "Hello Father!" The priest almost dropped his phone. Someone was shouting at him from a parked car. "Oh, Reverend Morris. Hello there." Damn, no chance of a repeat encounter, he thought. "I've just seen your wife going into the Methodist church." "Yes, I hope she won't be long. I'm just waiting for her." "Are you alright? You look a bit anxious, if you don't mind me saying." "It's a long story, Father. I think you'd better sit down in the passenger seat and I'll tell you. You've not heard about what's been going on in Oakwood Road church have you?" The priest looked confused. "Nope. Tell me more!" He opened the car door and sat down. I could do to unburden myself too." "Okay, well, this might sound a bit weird." "I can handle anything weird," Father Aiden replied. "It's about ghosts. As a Catholic, what are your thoughts on them and have you ever seen one?" Father Aiden thought about his answer very carefully. "Hmm. In theory, billions of ghosts potentially exist because billions of human beings have "lost" their bodies through death. Strictly speaking, these disembodied souls are not ghosts because they have never become discernible to any living people. Only those few souls whose presence is seen or felt by others are truly ghosts. And their existence is real." "So you've seen one?" "Yes. Two actually. Once in Ireland when I was a child and another when I was based in Liverpool. I was called upon to rid a family's home of a troubled spirit." Reverend Morris looked relieved. "That's good to know." "The Old Testament also has a few ghost stories. The most famous one is in 1 Samuel 28:8 thru 20. Here the inspired writer tells how King Saul met with the ghost of the prophet Samuel." Father Aiden replied. "Have you seen a ghost?" "Yes. And not just any ghost, but the ghost of John Wesley! He's haunting the Methodist church. That's why I'm here. Jenna's gone in there to try and help him return to, the other side." "Oh I see, then she must, wait, what?" Father Aiden did a double take. "Thanks for coming' along Mrs. Morris," Reverend Ewing said, shaking Jenna's hand. "I know you probably think this whole thing is crazy." "Not at all! And call me Jenna. I'm a true believer. If my husband says that you and he saw John Wesley, then I know it's true. But why does John want to see me of all people?" "Your hubby mentioned that your grandma is a Methodist?" "Uh yeah. Bit of a tenuous link. Like Sir Henry Barrington-Smythe's horse." "Huh?" "Oh, never mind. Figure of speech." "You Brits and your little quirks!" Reverend Ewing laughed. "I'm still getting used to 'em!" "You said John usually appears in the vestry?" "Uh-huh. Can be anywhere in the church, but he seems to like the vestry best." "Right, well go and wait in there and say a few prayers, and see if he appears. I'm not sure I can do anything, but I'll try my best." Jenna entered the vestry. Everything looked perfectly normal in there. She closed the door and looked around. "It always comes back to the vestry," she smiled to herself as she recalled when she first got to know Reverend Morris. Suddenly, the row of gowns on the rail began to swing on their hangers. The temperature dropped, and Jenna rubbed her arms. "Are you there, John?" She called out. "Yes." She spun round. There was no sign of the spirit. "Hey, come on, show yourself at least. It's no fun talking to the invisible man." "My sincere apologies," John replied, and slowly faded into view. For the first time, Jenna was taken aback. "My God, you really are John Wesley, " He nodded and bowed. "Bless ye, for am so honored you hath come here. If I may be so bold to say, you be a lady of great beauty my dear." "Very kind of you to say, Mr. Wesley." Jenna said. "Why are you back in the land of the living? Aren't you happy in Heaven?" "Ah yes," he began. "Happier than mortals can ever imagine. But you see, I feel compelled to return to this realm every All Hallow's Eve. I like to re-visit the places where I worshipped back when I was alive. And it was in this very place where this church now stands that I preached to crowds back in the autumn of 1778." "You've got a lot of places to visit in just one night," Jenna said. "I read all about you. You traveled all over England spreading the Word of the Lord. Plus you went to America, the colonies, when you were younger." "Indeed I did, yes. To my regret, I lingered a little too long here, for I found myself unable to return to the afterlife. The sun had started to rise, heralding All Saint's Day. Thus, I am trapped here in this church until next All Hallow's Eve. Only a tremendous release of positive energy could allow me to return before then." "Oh dear. May I ask why out of all the people in the world, you wanted to see me? What can I do? My gran is a Methodist. Is that the reason?" "No Miss Jenna. It was your aura that attracted me. It's very strong. I believe God himself must've embodied you with some sort of innate goodness that allows you to help people." "You're making me sound like some kind of saint! I assure you I'm just a regular human being. I'm not particularly gifted in anything, although I do try to be a good person, " John had a rather dreamy expression on his face. "You remind me so much of Grace Murray, a lady I loved and lost, only you be far prettier than her." It was then that Jenna had an idea. A huge grin spread across her face. She'd read all about John Wesley's life and how unlucky he'd been in love. "A tremendous release of positive energy, you say? I think I know something which may cause that!" John put his hands together. "You do? Pray, do tell, my dear." "You need to experience an orgasm. What could be more positive than that?" He blinked. "I beg your pardon?" "Oh you know, " She tried to think of a period-appropriate phrase so he'd understand. "The end act of carnal relations?" He blushed. "Oh. Miss Jenna I be a man of God. I don't see how, " Jenna sank to her knees. "Only one way to find out, John!" She paused. So he's a ghost. I've never pleasured a ghost before. Isn't he composed of just gas? He's quite cute, for someone who died in 1791! I wonder if, She reached out to touch him, and expected her hand to pass right through his body, but it didn't. He jolted at her touch. "Don't worry John. I've done this before, many times in fact. It's a great honor to be able to do it to you. I'm sure this will help you." The moment of first contact had arrived. Jenna let one hand gently glide ever so slightly over John's thigh, encased in tight black breeches. Reaching out with the other hand, she ran it over his crotch, feeling an impressive bulge. "Oh my! I feel strangely warmed yet again!" John sighed. Jenna fumbled with the buttons on his breeches, being more used to zippers. Something large and splendid lurked within. Either that or he had a Bible stuffed down there. "My God!" she gasped, as the Methodist's member was revealed. The short, slightly-built John Wesley was hung like a horse! "How on earth were you so unlucky in love?" Jenna exclaimed. "Mostly the ladies deserted me long before I even reached the bedchamber," he mumbled. "Well I'm not deserting you." She pledged.Outside the vestry, Reverend Ewing paced back and forth, wondering what the strange groaning noises were all about. "The hell is going' on in there?" She said out loud. "Ah!" John sighed, his eyes closed in ecstasy. Thoroughly satisfied, he cried out in joy. "Thank you! Thank you so much!""Ah! I'm free once more! You've freed me Jenna! I can't thank you enough! I can return and be at peace!" He began to rise up into the air. "I hope we shall meet again sometime! Farewell and God bless!" Jenna stood up and wiped her lips. "Godspeed, John! Oh! Just one more thing, next time you visit, can you bring your brother Charles along?" Reverend Ewing was about to knock on the vestry door, when it suddenly opened. "Oh! Is everything alright?" "Everything's fine. You can reopen your church. John's spirit is at peace once more." "For sure? He's really gone? But how?" "I just said a prayer for him. Told him how much his teaching continues to inspire people to this day. That seemed to satisfy him and he just faded away." "Well thank you so much, Jenna," the reverend said, shaking her hand. "I'm so glad it's all over. It was really stressing me out! and I'm so happy that John is at peace in the Lord's kingdom again. Oh, what's that on your clothing?" Jenna looked down and was mortified at the huge globs of cum. "Oh dear. It's, candle wax. I didn't realize it had spilled. I must get going now, Reverend Ewing. Simon is waiting in the car and he'll be getting worried." "Of course. Thank you again, and give my regards to Simon!" When she'd gone, Reverend Ewing looked round the vestry. "Hmm, strange. There are no candles in here." The lecherous church warden meets his match. After peace was restored to Oakwood Road Methodist Church, and the spirit of John Wesley successfully liberated, Jenna and Reverend Morris turned their attentions to this weekend's Remembrance Sunday service. This was always a major event, and the people would be crammed into St. Michael's like sardines. "I've finally completed this special sermon," Reverend Morris said, handing Jenna his iPad. "Have a read and tell me what you think. I included your suggestions about the importance of teaching the younger generation about those who died in wars. Also the bit about Winston Churchill being a flawed figure. Good suggestion, that. As human beings we are all flawed in some way." "It looks fantastic. Let me grab a coffee and settle down to enjoy this!" "I hope it won't come across as too boring. You know I always get paranoid about my sermons. So many churchgoers dread a long sermon!" "Your sermons are always fun and relevant, Simon, You're too hard on yourself." The mild-mannered vicar smiled. "Aww, thanks! Oh and I hope Norman Winstanley behaves himself this weekend. I had to have a quiet word with him during the Wednesday morning service." "The new churchwarden? What's he done wrong?" "Well, as you know, he took over from dear old Albert who died last month. He'd previously been at St. John's, but sadly, that church has closed for good and is being demolished. Such a shame. It was a great church back in the day." "Very sad when a church dies. What are they building in its place?" Jenna asked. "An Aldi supermarket. Anyways, about Norman. He's sixty-five and a terrible lecher, to put it plainly. Some say he's Sid James and Benny Hill cranked up to eleven. He didn't get nicknamed Carry On Norm for nothing." Jenna was immediately intrigued. How come I've never noticed this guy before? She thought. "Ooh. So he likes to ogle young women does he?" "Yes, but not just young! I've seen him staring at the legs of older women too. Last Sunday, I caught him perving at Mrs. Wilcox when she was doing the flower arranging. And she's about eighty! Though I admit, she does have nice legs, for someone er, so mature." "Naughty boy. At least he's not ageist." Jenna said. "He needs to get on OnlyFans." Reverend Morris couldn't help but laugh. "You always try to see the best in everyone! Well just looking is one thing, but Norman has built up a bit of a reputation for being a qualified pincher of bottoms. I won't tolerate that sort of behavior. It's completely unacceptable. I'm surprised he's avoided getting into more trouble, to be honest." "Is he married?" "No, widowed. Took early retirement too. Has far too much time on his hands. And we all know that the Devil makes work for idle hands, " "So true," Jenna nodded. "He makes bottoms for idle hands to pinch. "I don't think I've seen Norman. What does he look like?" "Well he wears glasses and he's the spitting image of Frank Carson." Jenna blinked. "Who?" "Heh, I keep forgetting the age gap between us. Frank was a Northern Irish comedian. He's dead now. My dad was and still is a massive fan of him. He used to go and see him on stage at Blackpool in the 1990s." Reverend Morris looked up a picture of the comedian on his phone and showed it to her. "Ok. I'll keep an eye out for Norman this Sunday!" "If he tries anything with you, tell me at once!" "Oh don't worry. He wouldn't dare," Jenna replied, smirking to herself, an idea already forming in her mind. Naughty Norman. I can't have a churchwarden with wandering hands threatening Simon's church. I'd better get my hands on him before he causes any more trouble! As expected, the Sunday service was very well-attended. Jenna had arrived early, as she wanted to sit in a specific place right in the front pew. She chose to sit on the left side, in front of the organ. She'd chosen this spot because it was semi-hidden, due to a convenient pillar. More importantly, Norman the churchwarden would soon be standing here, just a few feet away, ready to direct people when it was time to take communion. For Remembrance Sunday, Jenna had chosen a smart, but conservative black dress and a silk scarf featuring a poppy pattern. She was wearing two paper poppy badges, and one of them was in a very intimate place. "I hope this isn't disrespectful to the war dead," she thought to herself as she crossed her legs. "But it's necessary. This is for the good of the church's reputation. Very helpful that these self-adhesive poppy badges exist now. I just hope it doesn't drop off, " Before long, Norman Winstanley appeared and Jenna recognized him at once. Her husband's Frank Carson description had been spot on. The guy looked just like him. A full head of white hair, glasses and bushy eyebrows. A stocky build, with a beer gut. Norman looked very smart. He was wearing a dark grey suit with white shirt and maroon tie. He had big hairy hands. Jenna wondered if other parts of his body were hairy. "Ah, that's him. Mr. Wandering Hands Winstanley," she said to herself. She should've been repulsed by this randy old boomer, like most women her age would be, but as usual, she found herself lusting after him and getting wet. "I wonder if he wears y-fronts like Gordon? He looks the type." Of all the different types of underwear she'd seen men of this church wearing, y-fronts and boxer shorts were her favorite. Norman stood in his usual place, ready to direct the lost sheep, as he termed the congregation, to the pews, and then out again, when called for communion. St. Michael's had an efficient system whereby the congregation, one pew at a time, went up for communion, walked in a circle round the church and back to their seat. This system had been introduced during the pandemic, but had proved so successful, it had been kept on. Suddenly, the strains of the organ interrupted the quietness of the church, as Gordon began playing the opening hymn, O God Our Help in Ages Past. Everyone dutifully stood up, and it was then that Jenna caught Norman's eye. She noticed him staring and winked at him. He winked back at her. Immediately, she knew she had his full, undivided attention. Who's that tasty little filly? Norman thought. I haven't seen her before. Mind you, I've only been helping out here a week. Not many young lasses in this church. She's a pretty one. Mmm, I'd like to goose her! Look at him, undressing me with his eyes, Jenna smirked. Oh he's horny all right. I think he needs a lot more than a butt cheek to pinch. I bet his balls are as blue as a Smurf's arse. The hymn finished, and everyone sat down, as Reverend Morris began the usual start of the morning Eucharist. "A very blessed welcome to all who have joined us today, for this, our special Remembrance Sunday service. We are gathered here today to reflect on those who gave their lives in the service of this country. At the same time, we reflect on those who are currently enduring the horrors of war. The people of Ukraine, Syria and Afghanistan. Let us pray, " Jenna bowed her head. At the same time, she crossed her legs and slid her dress up, exposing some creamy white thigh. Norman's eyes almost popped out of his head. She was sure she heard him utter a noise, rather like the whinny of a horse. At the same time, Gordon peered over the top of the organ, waiting for his cue to start playing the Gloria in Excelsis. His elevated position afforded him a perfect view of Jenna, when he spotted her sitting right at the front. He assumed she'd chosen to sit there for his benefit. "Venus herself," he muttered, gazing at her flawless legs and remembering the last time they'd been wrapped round his body at the vicarage social. He felt his cock starting to throb. "God she makes me feel glad that I was born a man!" A cough brought him to his senses. Josh the curate was desperately trying to attract his attention as discreetly as possible. "Oh, sorry!" Gordon whispered, fumbling with his music sheets. He started playing the Gloria. Jenna was getting excited just thinking about flashing her white panties. Her nipples were already erect and hard and she could feel that familiar warm, moist sensation between her legs. Slowly, she slid her dress up higher and uncrossed her legs, doing so in such a way that it was impossible to avoid a panty flash. She looked at Norman and raised an eyebrow. He let out an audible gasp and his face flushed a shade of red that looked as if his blood pressure had reached stroke-inducing levels. Fumbling in his pocket, he grabbed a handkerchief and wiped his face. Jenna noticed how his forehead and upper lip were glistening with sweat. No-Nut November might be a thing, but not in my world, Jenna thought. At this rate, poor Norman will have collapsed before I even get to unzip him. He was looking at her again and she noticed his bulge in his trousers that he tried covering with crossed hands. Communion was rapidly approaching, and in the middle of the offertory hymn, Norman suddenly rushed off to the gents. When he returned a few minutes later, Jenna noticed his flies were unzipped. She wondered whether he'd done this deliberately or forgotten to zip up after having a pee or a wank. "So you want to play do you?" Jenna whispered and winked at him. Norman was holding an order of service booklet, and deliberately dropped it. As he squatted down to pick it up, the gap in his unzipped trousers widened, allowing Jenna a glimpse of his underwear. She was thrilled to have a peek at his pale blue y-fronts and the bulge contained within. "Very nice!" She mouthed to him and blew a discreet kiss. It was time to take communion, and being sat at the front, Jenna had to go first. Calmly, she rose from the pew and walked past the organ. As she did, the poppy pinned to her dress fell out. "Oh dear, she said, and bent down to pick it up. As she did, she ensured her dress rose up, revealing a flash of her panties. However it was Gordon who got the full eyeful. He leant over for a better look, and clumsily knocked a load of music books off the shelf at the side of the organ. "Damn and blast it," he muttered, scrambling to pick them up. Jenna took communion and walked round the church and down the side aisle. As she approached her pew, Norman "helpfully" held out his hand to direct her, and she took the opportunity to squeeze past him. As she did, she felt a hand cup her right buttock and give a little pinch. "You're a dirty old man, Mr. Winstanley," she said. "Luckily for you, I happen to be a dirty young woman." Quick as a whip, she slid her hand to his crotch and groped his bulge through his unzipped trousers. "Ah, oh!" Norman jolted in surprise. Jenna sat down and smiled at him. "I want to see more. Do you?" His nostrils flared, and he quickly backed off, squirming with arousal and bewilderment. Jenna wondered if she'd scared him off, but as the organ music resumed and communion ended, she saw him grab the order of service booklet again and hold it sideways against his crotch. Wondering where this would lead, she was ready to play. It was much more fun than her doing all the flashing. She raised her leg and slid a finger across her panties, pulling the material to the side, giving him a peek at her pubic hair. Norman felt like he was going to cum in his underpants, if this continued. His face was red and his breathing was shallow. He wondered just how much longer he could hold on, but hold on he did. This cheeky little filly was unlike any other woman he'd ever encountered. A wiser, less lecherous man would've backed off long ago, in this age of Me Too, mindful that he could be being led into a trap. But Norman was a shameless, seasoned groper and letch, and he wasn't going to back down now. Using the booklet to shield his crotch from other members of the congregation, a swift movement of his left hand freed his cock, and the top of it poked out from his blue underpants. Not looking down at himself, not acknowledging that his erect dick was visible, the churchwarden acted as if everything was normal. Jenna couldn't stop staring at his cock. It was more ram rod than sham rod. She licked her lips and made a gesture to him with a clenched fist moving up and down. What a delicious-looking cock he has! She was practically drooling like a dog in heat, in the same way he was drooling at the sight of her pubic bush. And speaking of which, she hiked up her dress and revealed the front of her panties. Attached to them was another paper poppy. Norman's jaw dropped. At the same time, Gordon craned his neck to peer over the top of the organ again and got a grandstand view of Jenna's poppy. "Holy shit!" He spluttered. He quickly sat down on the stool, but not before knocking his books over a second time. Further along the front pew, sat four old ladies all in their nineties, notorious gossips of the church. "I say Margaret, I think the organist is drunk. He's not quite himself. He was dreadfully out of time when he played the Gloria!" "Well really. It's disgraceful. On Remembrance Sunday of all days. Oh my good gracious, Mavis! Look at that! The churchwarden's flies are undone!" Immediately, the four of them leant forward in unison to get a better look. "Heaven's above, you can see his, concern! How shocking! Somebody should tell him!" "Maud, it's times like this that I really envy the youth. They have those fancy telephones that take instant photos." "The last time I saw a man in such a state was in 1943, and I'd just turned eighteen. Those American G I blokes, such good times!" Jenna couldn't wait any longer. The service wouldn't end for another ten minutes. Removing the poppy from her panties, she adjusted her dress and rose from the pew. "Join me in the gents," she whispered, and pressed the poppy into Norman's hand. "Lest we forget!" Norman just nodded, stunned. He glanced down at the poppy. My God, what a precious object. He would treasure it forever. Carefully placing it in his shirt pocket, he zipped up his trousers and discreetly made his way to the toilets at the front of the church. The gents toilets were empty, and Jenna made her way past the row of urinals and into the end cubicle. Moments later, she heard the door open and Norman entered. He nervously glanced round. "Pist, in here!" Jenna said, ushering him inside. She locked the cubicle door and closed the toilet lid. "Who are you?" Norman spluttered. "You're a cunning little vixen! I want to take handfuls of you, you're amazing! You've got me well and truly foxed!" "My name is Jenna," she replied. "And you're Norman, yes? Our new churchwarden?" He nodded. "If you don't mind," she said looking up at him with lust-filled eyes, "I'd love to suck that hard cock of yours." Norman looked like all his Christmases and birthdays had come at once. "Oh Jenna, I'd love for you to suck me," he sighed. "I'd love to cum in your mouth. I'd love to watch you swallow all of my thick cum!" Jenna sat down on the toilet and unzipped his trousers, then unbuckled his belt. Wanting full, unobstructed access to the churchwarden's member, she pulled his trousers and y-fronts down to his ankles. Norman said nothing, he simply stood there, watching her work her magic. He never once wondered why such a young and attractive woman would want to suck his cock so willingly. It had been years, decades even, since a woman had wanted to pleasure him! He was actually getting a blowjob from a stunning redhead, for free!" "What a lovely cock you've got, Norman. I could see how big it was when you gave me that cheeky little glimpse of it in the church service earlier!" She wasn't lying. He did indeed have a nice plump shaft, with big balls, and wiry white pubes. "Some men are like fine wine, they get better with age!" Without hesitation, she impaled her mouth on his shaft. Taking him deep while stroking him, licking him, and sucking him. Norman put his hand on the back of Jenna's head. Jenna cupped his balls, feeling them throb and pulsate, she knew precisely when he was about to cum. At the same time, she ran her other hand up under his shirt, feeling his hairy paunch. "That tickles!" Norman murmured, sighing and groaning. Back in the church, the service had nearly ended, much to Gordon's relief. He really needed a pee. Thanks to Jenna, he needed a wank too, but there wasn't time. Whilst the vicar was reading out a lot of notices, he had just enough time to pop to the gents, relieve himself and head back to the organ to play the recessional hymn. "Mmm," Jenna murmured, her mouth full of cock. Suddenly, Norman heard someone else enter the toilets. "Jenna, someone's come in!" He whispered. "Mmm," was all she could reply, and continued sucking him. Gordon hurried to a urinal and unzipped his trousers. As he began to pee, a loud groan came from the end cubicle. He ignored it and continued relieving himself. The mystery bloke in the cubicle made several loud grunts. Gordon glanced round. "Bloody hell," he muttered. "That poor sod's got a bad case of constipation." He finished, zipped up, washed his hands and hurried out of the toilets, wondering who the unfortunate man was. "Oh, Oh fuck!" Norman groaned, as his climax neared. "Jenna! I'm going to give you a lovely, big creamy surprise!" "Give it to me, Norman!" She felt his cock quiver and his balls tightened in her hand and she got her first taste of his cum. Jet after jet of his thick seed squirted from his cock into Jenna's eager mouth. He took out his cock to allow her to swallow his load and, as she was doing so, he stroked it and managed to squirt a few more sticky blasts all over her face. "Ah," Norman panted. "That was wonderful Jenna, I enjoyed that more than anything. I hope it was as enjoyable for you as it was for me! Did you like all my cum in that sweet mouth of yours?" "Oh I loved that! Your cum tastes so good, Norman!" Jenna lowered her head and planted a kiss on his cock and then on his sweaty, hairy balls. Doing a dreadful attempt at a Northern Irish accent, she added, "It's the way you tell 'em!" "Eh?" Norman said. "My poor attempt at a Frank Carson impression," she replied. "My husband said you resemble him." "You, you're married?" "Yes," Jenna said, standing up. "I'm the vicar's wife." A look of horror appeared on Norman's face. "Oh my God, " "Don't look so worried, Norman." She put her finger to his lips. "Our little secret, yes? Of course, you need to behave yourself from now on. A little birdy told me that you are quite liberal with those wandering hands of yours. No more bum pinching and goosing of any other ladies whilst you're in St. Michael's, is that understood?" He nodded, panic in his eyes. "Say it out loud, in God's name. Because God knows everything." "In the name of God, I promise I'll keep my hands to myself," Norman said. "That's my Norm," she replied, planting a kiss on his lips. "We'd better get out of here. Other chaps will be coming in. You go first." "R-right. Okay." Norman zipped up his trousers, fastened his belt, composed himself and hurried out of the cubicle. He opened the door and glanced round. "There's no-one here. Quick, you dash into the ladies." Jenna ran past him. As she did, she pinched his arse. "Until next time then," she giggled. Norman breathed a sigh of relief and opened the main door that led back into the church. The service had ended and people were starting to file out of the pews. Norman wiped his forehead. His mind was spinning. Not looking where he was going, he almost walked into Gordon, who'd seen him leaving the toilets. "Sorry," he muttered. "No worries," Gordon replied. "Listen, there's a first aid kit and other medicine in the vestry. I can get you some Dulcolax tablets." Norman looked confused. "What?" "No need to be embarrassed. All us older blokes get constipated from time to time. I couldn't help but overhear you in the gents earlier, and you seemed to be in bloody agony with your bowels!" To be continued. By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

On our new weekly lightning round mini ep with with Frank Carson, we're fucking around with never deleting cheeky pints ever again, only selling vintage Barstool merch, cum stains, never finding your size, original smells, Arsenal winning the Premiership, reversing Brexit, unlimited Stella on tap, doubling the square footage of your store, gooning out with the lads, never getting head again, Liam Gallagher, shrinking a foot and much more.

The mountains are indeed blue on this week's interview with our old pal Leisure Centre's Frank Carson. Frank pulled up to scatter some silver bullets and banter on being bequeathed our mad dog nickname, what sets his vintage spot apart, getting into collecting and his moment of jawnception, the late great Bob Hoskins, how to hunt and tips for thrifting, the gnarliest trenches, all time high score vintage prices and weirdness, white whales, being bullish on casual tailoring, men's fashion boy math, the bartering days of yore, baby clothes need to go and why the Y2K trend still has room to grow, Bode's Hester Street runoff, unwritten rules of the game, all the love he has for the vintage homies in the Throwing Fits extended universe, hunting in London vs. NYC, historic oppressors capitalizing on Blokecore, the most goated kits, the genius of our mutual boy and his shooter Seth aka Meth Fountain, lad Mount Rushmore, the most British ass day we can possible have and much more on this drunk and disorderly episode of The Only Podcast That Matters™.

Clint Schaff - Former Producer and Founder, LA Times Studios Mary Anne Radmacher wrote that “Your responsibility is to be an explorer, not a tourist in this adventure that is your life.” Our guest today took up that challenge from the time he was a kid: dreaming of robots, searching for community, and as he got older, discovering and amplifying stories that matter, at one of the biggest news agencies in the world. His professional expeditions have been so varied that his very impressive career resists categorization. So instead, we'll lean in as he parts the curtain and we jointly consider this question:   What makes a career meaningful? A conversation with Clint Schaff, former producer and founder of L.A. Times Studios, on this episode of Lead With a Question. Guest Bio: Clint Schaff is award-winning producer of audio, television, film, and live-event projects, and a communicator and connector for social good.  He works independently, with media and journalism organizations, with cultural institutions, and with brands and companies. In 2020, Adweek honored Clint as one of its Creative 100, which celebrates the 100 most inspiring minds in marketing, media and culture, and as one of ten honorees in the category of Media Innovators.  Since moving to Bentonville, Arkansas in 2021, Clint has been busy. He has founded FIXIN, which brings to market media products that have an intention to positively change the world, and distributed its first full-length music album, “Bring On The…” from PARISHES. In 2022, Clint joined the campaign to elect Chris Jones—the physicist/minister/educator/non-profit leader, and Democratic nominee for Governor of Arkansas—as the campaign's communications director. Best known for his work as Vice President of Strategy and Development at the Los Angeles Times, Clint was the first employee and founding operator of L.A. Times Studios, and was responsible for the development and programming of various audio, video and experiential projects. Successful projects include the immensely popular Dirty John podcast and two seasons of Dirty John, the television series franchise (which aired on Bravo and USA networks for Seasons 1 and 2, respectively). Clint has led the development and business-side operations around many successful podcasts, including Man In the Window, Larger Than Life, Room 20, Chasing Cosby, It Was Simple: The Betty Broderick Murders, The Trials of Frank Carson, Asian Enough and The Times: Daily news from the L.A. Times.  At the Los Angeles Times, Clint has led several strategic initiatives and launched new platforms including L.A. Times Today, an Emmy-winning nightly news magazine show on Spectrum News 1 SoCal; the Newstory storytelling festival, which brought five stages of cutting-edge tech-driven medium stories to the long-standing L.A. Times Festival of Books; and the upcoming launch of L.A. Times Short Docs, which introduces established and emerging filmmakers through the company's opinion section. Prior to Los Angeles Times, Clint was U.S. General Manager directing all domestic operations, creative and account activities for Vision7 integrated advertising teams in Los Angeles and New York.  Before that, Clint served as a Vice President for digital at two leading global agencies, Edelman and Golin. Over the course of his career, he has earned praise and awards for his work with high-profile brands and organizations including Procter & Gamble, Activision, Nintendo, Nestle, POM Wonderful, FIJI Water, Wonderful Pistachios, the Clinton-Gore White House, David Bowie, and the New York Yankees,. Clint has a BA in Communications & Political Science from the University of Minnesota and a MA from the University of Southern California Annenberg School for Communications and Journalism. After earning his graduate degree from USC, he returned to USC Annenberg for 10 years to teach as an adjunct instructor. Clint lives in Bentonville, Arkansas, and enjoys hosting Hip Hop Hello—a weekly radio show on both 103.3 KOBV Bentonville Community Radio and KUAF Fayetteville NPR affiliate, rapping hip hop karaoke, attending live sporting events and concerts, and nature walks with his wife Jessica, doggy Mia, and Baby Carter. Connect with Clint on Social: LinkedIn • Facebook • Twitter --------- Please like, subscribe, rate, and review! Every listener interaction helps others discover the show too! Learn about the work we're doing at Bravecore by visiting our website at Home - Bravecore To drop us a line, head over to Contact - Bravecore

Phone interview by Peter Jonathan Robertson in 2002 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

From BOTTOM to FEELINGS!!!!!Rik Mayall Vs Les Dawson but who deserves a place in Round 2?????Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/eliminationpodcast?fan_landing=true)

FRANK CARSON'S "IT'S THE WAY I TELL EM" Vs THE HUGE TEETH OF ROB BECKETTFor the first time we have a tune for THE QUIZ and it might just be Bob's best work yet.Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/eliminationpodcast?fan_landing=true)

Stuart Loughland is not only SAFIRE Illusionists but he has puppet fingers in many different pies and he even built those fingers.He is one of the loveliest of humans in our business and it's the reason I love doing these podcasts catching up with people I have missed and love to work with or watch work from the wings.He has worked with many top entertainers over his career including Ken Dodd, Peter Kay, Joe Pasquale, Danny La Rue, Billy Pearce, Frank Carson, Johnnie Casson , Stu Francis, The Chuckle Brothers, Jimmy Cricket, Keith Harris, Cannon and Ball, The Rolypolys, Ian Lavender, Mick Miller, Paul Crone ,Hinge and Bracket , Bernie Clifton, Keith Harris, David Lonsdale , Bucks Fizz, Ted Rodgers, The Bachelors, The Grumbleweed's, The Nolans, Bobby Crush, Ray Alan and the list goes on. As well as directing & producing, Stuart makes puppets and builds scenery, props and illusions. He has made commissions that have been used in professional productions in theatre and television all over the world. Stuart now runs Magic Light Productions along with Libby Edwards, producing pantomimes and family shows across the UK. And he proudly talks of Libby's debut Children's book Trixibelle and the birthday spell. His stories are wonderful and I'm going to let him tell them, welcome to Eyes & Teeth – A Touch of magic – Stuart Loughland

Since episode 388 2013, I've been asking my audio what is your ONE FAVORITE podcast (and yes, I know it's hard to pick just one) but more importantly WHY is it your favorite? Steve Stewart loves the Stacking Benjamins Show I interview Steve and Mark Deal on 752 about the Podcast Editor Academy York from Poetic Earthlings likes the Matt Walsh Show show. Chris Lewis from the Dads with Daughters podcast loves The Real Brian Show. I interview Brian back on episode 449 Glenn from the Coaching Kids Curling Podcast loves the Dave Chang Show.  If you're a person of color LISTEN TO EPISODE 806 Kim Newlove of the Pharmacists Voice loves the School of Podcasting (especially 779 on Reviews, and 792 when you die) Louis Goodman of Live the Lawyer loves the Trials of Frank Carson  Scott Johnson from What Was That Like?? loves the How Sound Podcast. Neil Scott  from Recovery Coast to Coast Loves the Bob Lefsetz Podcast. Matt Rafferty of the Author Inside You loves the Grand Scheme Snatching Sinatra Joe Saul Sehy from Stacking Benjamins Show loves the Xbox On Joe mentioned The E myth book. Mark Vinet from the History of North America Podcast loves the Book Note Plus show. Shane Whaley from Spybrary and Tourpreneur loves the "That Record Got Me High" podcast. Joe loves the Warrior Next Door Podcast. Bryan Goodwin of the Relaxed Male  loves the Alive and Free show Anthony Arno of the Route 66 Podcast and the Stemclass Podcast loves the Space Shot Podcast. Dave from Your Podcast Consultant loves I Hear Things from Tom Webster.  JANUARY QUESTION OF THE MONTH I need your answer before 1/28/22 Picture yourself in a podcast app in front of a podcast you might actually enjoy. Think of this experience and comment on it. What caught your eye? Is the description important? Do you subscribe? or "Cherry Pick" episodes. Do you ever subscribe/Follow? As we all want more followers/subscribers (and yes we know most of us find our podcasts via word of mouth), BUT when you're in an app, (I realize this is kind of vague), but what goes through your mind before you press either play or subscribe/follow? Don't forget to tell us a little bit about your show, and your website address. Go to www.schoolofpodcasting.com/question Ready To Start Your Podcast? You may think nobody would listen to you, but I'm here to tell you they will. I have proven strategies to help you identify exactly what your audience wants. You will sound professional, and won't have to spend a million dollars to sound great. Learn through our online tutorials, live group coaching and a private Facebook Group filled with brilliant podcasters. Join worry-free with a 30-day money-back guarantee. See schoolofpodcasting.com/workwithme Follow the Show and Never Miss an Episode on: Apple - Google - Spotify - Amazon Check out New Podcast Apps for apps to stream bitcoin to podcasters. Did You Get Value From This Episode? Enjoy the Show? Buy Dave a Coffee and give some of that value back.   

Liz Recommends - Radio National Fictionshttps://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/radio-national-fictions/Radio National Fictions is the ABC's place for creative audio fiction. Working with Australia's best writers and emerging creators, Fictions will bring you thought-provoking writing and sumptuous sound design.We deal in the hilarious, the gritty and sometimes the dystopian.Think of it as movies for your ears.https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/radio-national-fictions/id1496093216Nick Recommends - The Trials of Frank Carson“The Trials of Frank Carson” is a story of power, politics, and the law in California's Central Valley. Frank Carson was Stanislaus County's most controversial defense attorney, a wizard with juries, and a courtroom brawler with an unapologetically caustic style. He racked up legal wins for decades. He was the terror of police and prosecutors, often accusing them personally of corruption. When a small-time thief disappeared, police — some of them Carson's longtime adversaries — launched a massive investigation into a spectral underworld of street hustlers, junkies and snitches. Carson was charged with murder, accused of masterminding a conspiracy. It would be one of the longest criminal trials in California history, with the flinty veteran of so many courtroom wars on trial for his lifeLinkZane Recommends - Counter Clockhttps://counterclockpodcast.com/In order to tell the story of a crime, you have to turn back time. Every season, Investigative journalist Delia D'Ambra digs deep into a mind-bending mystery with the hopes of reigniting interest in a decades-old homicide case.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id1489482036 See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Female serial killers are rare, but that doesn't mean they're any less vicious. This week, Amy and Chris profile 3 of the most incredible cases involving serial killers of the fairer sex. In the first story, Chris details Delphine LaLaurie, who was a sadistic murderer and torturer from New Orleans. She was a wealthy and well-connected woman who carried out her horrible acts within the comfort of her Louisiana mansion. Most of her victims were slaves on her property, and she subjected them to burning, dismembering and many other atrocities. Her crimes were so sickening, a mob drove her out and she exiled herself to France. Information on her and her family after this time is very limited. The first female American serial killer, Belle Gunness, is often overshadowed by Aileen Wuornos, but Belle walked so Aileen could run. Belle was born in Norway and emigrated to the United States in 1881. Belle's victims were mostly wealthy men who she managed to lure onto her Indiana farm under the guise of sex, love and marriage. The exact amount of Belle's victims is unknown, but it could be as high as 40 people! Belle supposedly died in a fire, but many believe that she faked her death Danish serial killer Dagmar Overbye murdered as many as 25 children, including one of her own between 1913 and 1920. She is believed to the inspiration for the witch in the famous story "Hansel and Gretel." Dagmar opened up a daycare, which became a nearly endless supply of babies for her to kill in the most gruesome of fashions. Luckily for us, her death in prison is well-recorded. Finally, Amy brings you a bonus story about Leonarda Cianciulli, otherwise known The Soap-Maker of Correggio. But the soap she made had a secret and gruesome ingredient, human flesh. Leonarda somehow got it into her mind that her son needed spiritual protection as he was fighting in World War II. Her solution was to lure vulnerable women to her home where she killed, dismembered, and repurposed their body parts as soap, cakes and even clothing. Send your true crime suggestions to hello@truecrimerecaps! Support the show AND listen ad-free here!: https://truecrimerecaps.supercast.tech/ Listen and subscribe now to ‘The Trials of Frank Carson' on LATIMES.com, or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts Design like a pro with Canva Pro! Get a FREE 45-day extended trial when you go to Canva.me/TRUE Follow TCR on YouTube here! Follow TCR on Instagram here! Follow TCR on Facebook here!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Female serial killers are rare, but that doesn't mean they're any less vicious. This week, Amy and Chris profile 3 of the most incredible cases involving serial killers of the fairer sex.In the first story, Chris details Delphine LaLaurie, who was a sadistic murderer and torturer from New Orleans. She was a wealthy and well-connected woman who carried out her horrible acts within the comfort of her Louisiana mansion. Most of her victims were slaves on her property, and she subjected them to burning, dismembering and many other atrocities. Her crimes were so sickening, a mob drove her out and she exiled herself to France. Information on her and her family after this time is very limited.The first female American serial killer, Belle Gunness, is often overshadowed by Aileen Wuornos, but Belle walked so Aileen could run. Belle was born in Norway and emigrated to the United States in 1881. Belle's victims were mostly wealthy men who she managed to lure onto her Indiana farm under the guise of sex, love and marriage. The exact amount of Belle's victims is unknown, but it could be as high as 40 people! Belle supposedly died in a fire, but many believe that she faked her deathDanish serial killer Dagmar Overbye murdered as many as 25 children, including one of her own between 1913 and 1920. She is believed to the inspiration for the witch in the famous story "Hansel and Gretel." Dagmar opened up a daycare, which became a nearly endless supply of babies for her to kill in the most gruesome of fashions. Luckily for us, her death in prison is well-recorded.Finally, Amy brings you a bonus story about Leonarda Cianciulli, otherwise known The Soap-Maker of Correggio. But the soap she made had a secret and gruesome ingredient, human flesh. Leonarda somehow got it into her mind that her son needed spiritual protection as he was fighting in World War II. Her solution was to lure vulnerable women to her home where she killed, dismembered, and repurposed their body parts as soap, cakes and even clothing.Send your true crime suggestions to hello@truecrimerecaps!Support the show AND listen ad-free here!: https://truecrimerecaps.supercast.tech/Listen and subscribe now to ‘The Trials of Frank Carson' on LATIMES.com, or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcastsDesign like a pro with Canva Pro! Get a FREE 45-day extended trial when you go to Canva.me/TRUEFollow TCR on YouTube here!Follow TCR on Instagram here!Follow TCR on Facebook here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A woman drops her daughter off at daycare then disappears. Without any evidence or clues, Los Angeles investigators have no leads until an anonymous tipster gives the detectives a name that may crack the case. Check out our great sponsors! Listen and subscribe now to The Trials of Frank Carson on LATimes.com or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts! Grove: Go to Grove.co/coldcase to choose a FREE gift with your first order of $30 or more! Klaviyo: To get started with a free trial of Klaviyo - visit Klaviyo.com/coldcase Scott's Cheap Flights: Join for free at Scottscheapflights.com/coldcase and never overpay for flights again! Progressive: Get a quote today at Progressive.com and see why 4 out of 5 new auto customers recommend Progressive!

A woman drops her daughter off at daycare then disappears. Without any evidence or clues, Los Angeles investigators have no leads until an anonymous tipster gives the detectives a name that may crack the case. Check out our great sponsors! Listen and subscribe now to The Trials of Frank Carson on LATimes.com or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts! Grove: Go to Grove.co/coldcase to choose a FREE gift with your first order of $30 or more! Klaviyo: To get started with a free trial of Klaviyo - visit Klaviyo.com/coldcase Scott's Cheap Flights: Join for free at Scottscheapflights.com/coldcase and never overpay for flights again! Progressive: Get a quote today at Progressive.com and see why 4 out of 5 new auto customers recommend Progressive!

Lawrence is a city of around 75,000, situated near the New Hampshire border. In November of 2016, a teenage boy vanished from his grandmother's home. CCTV footage would capture him in the company of another teenage boy. His disappearance, and the outcome, would lead to many within the community questioning whether Lawrence police really did their job and whether they had shrugged the teenager off as a runaway simply because he was Hispanic.Listen on Vodacast for bonus content: http://feed.vodacast.com/55119360/Morbidology/110:%20Lee%20Manuel%20Viloria-PaulinoSPONSORS -VODACAST: Thank you to Vodacast for sponsoring this episode! Vodacast is a brand new podcast app. What sets it apart is that they provide deeper, digital stories. You can listen to your favorite podcast while immersing yourself in some bonus content from that episode: https://vodacast.com/SCARY TIME PODCAST: Thank you to Scary Time Podcast for sponsoring this episode! This podcast covers cases such as paranormal hauntings, aliens, creepy places, strange phenomena and everything in between. Subscribe today: http://www.dummies.fan/ScaryTime-MorbidologyFOREO: Thank you to Foreo for sponsoring this episode! Foreo re-invents beauty & wellness by offering innovative devices that install confidence & improve your skin. Get 35% off their Amazon bundle with code “MORBID50” at: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/D45C96B5-7B6C-43FB-A5ED-FE544D4856E0L.A. TIMES: Thank you to L.A. Times for sponsoring this episode! The Trials of Frank Carson is a brand new true crime podcast from L.A. Times. Frank Carson was a defence attorney who became embroiled in a murder case. Listen on all podcast platforms or: https://www.latimes.com/podcast/trials-of-frank-carson-podcastSHOW NOTES - https://morbidology.com/morbidology-the-podcast-110-lee-manuelPATREON - https://www.patreon.com/morbidologyAudio Credit:Evening of Chaos - Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Empty Reflections - ErikMMusic - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgq4SPKHlyIA Mothers Sacrifice - OurMusicBox - https://ourmusicbox.com/Dark Tranquility - Anno Domini Beats - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6mBav72Ak

Our host Christopher Goffard is joined by his editor, Steve Clow, to talk about how authorities linked the disappearance of Korey Kauffman to Frank Carson.This is a subscriber-exclusive bonus episode of “The Trials of Frank Carson.” Subscribe now to unlock all eight of these exclusive bonus episodes — and also enjoy our award-winning journalism and Unlimited Digital Access on our website, mobile app and eNewspaper. https://www.latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts

Our host Christopher Goffard is joined by his editor, Steve Clow, to discuss the origins of The Trials of Frank Carson.

Also known as the Rotenberg Cannibal, Armin Meiwes is currently serving a life sentence for cutting up and consuming Bernd Jürgen Armando Brandes, a man he met over a chatroom for people with cannibalistic fetishes. Savannah explores Armin and Brandes' background, the night that Armin and Brandes met up to consume Brandes and videotape the entire event, and why Armin is currently allowed to walk around the town with police protection. Love Killer Instincts but hate the ads? Subscribe to the ad-free version here!: https://killerinstinct.supercast.tech/ Get 10% Off by visiting BetterHelp.com/instinct! Download the 5 star-rated puzzle game, Best Fiends FREE today on the App Store or Google Play! Listen and subscribe now to ‘The Trials of Frank Carson' on LATIMES.com, or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts! Secure your online activity today at ExpressVPN.com/killer and get an extra three months FREE!  If you have any thoughts on this case or any other case, or just want to get in touch with Savannah about the show, email her at killerinstinctpodcast@gmail.com.  Follow Savannah on IG: @savannahbrymer  Follow Savannah on Twitter: @savannahbrymer   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the early 1980s, several girls went missing in the Salem, Oregon area. Some disappeared with hardly a trace while others turned up dead. An 18-year-old recent high school graduate disappeared while delivering pizzas on the night of July 4th, 1982 leaving behind her car with the engine still running. The hunt for her abductor would lead those working on the case down many paths, but no one expected how it would be connected to multiple murders years later. In today's episode, we explore the cases of Sherry Eyerly, Rebecca Darling, Katherine Redmond, and Terry Monroe; four young women who were taken when their lives were just beginning.This week's promo is from 'The Trials of Frank Carson' - Listen and subscribe now to ‘The Trials of Frank Carson' on lattices.com, or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts. Today's episode is also brought to you by Green Chef! Green Chef makes life easier by delivering delicious meals right to your door. Go to GreenChef.com/rain100 and use code rain100 to get $100 off AND free shipping!Looking to relax? Kefla Organics puts 25mg of CBD in their delicious products. Use code ‘Rain20' at check out to get 20% off organic CBD products from Kefla Organic.Come visit us at CrimeCon UK this September, it's sure to be wild! Use code ‘RAIN' to get 10% off of your tickets - prices will rise soon, so get them while you can!Make sure to follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and TikTok to see us on our 24 our true crime documentary binge-a-thon. We will press play on MagellanTV at 10 am Pacific Time July 10th, 2021, and have 48 hours to complete our quest. Visit our MagellanTV website and get a 30-day free trial just for being one of our listeners! We'll also be picking 4 lucky followers to get a free 3-month membership and some Murder in the Rain swag!The Charley Project - Sherry Melissa Eyerly | The Doe Network - Sherry Melissa Eyerly | Unsolved Mysteries Fandom - Sherry Eyerly | Murderpedia - William Scott Smith | Oregon Live - Decades Old Salem Murder | Statesman Journal - Searchers Fail to Find Missing Teenager 6 July 1982 | Statesman Journal - Friends and Family 6 July 1982 | Statesman Journal - Dominos puts stress on security 7 July 1982 | The Spokesman Review - Clerk Vanishes from store 20 February 1984 | Statesman Journal - Smith No Stranger to the System 26 April 1984 | Statesman Journal - Cold Case 19 October 2012 | Statesman Journal - We were convinced there were more 19 December 2007 | Statesman Journal - Smith Guilty 10 July 1984 | Statesman Journal - Authorities Comb Through Site April 13 1984 | The World Link - Convicted Serial Killer Pleads Guilty to Third Murder | Oregon Secretary of State - Focus Song | NeighborhoodScout - Salem, OR | Wikipedia - Salem Oregon | UPI - The body of Willamette University Coed… | UPI - The Grand Jury | PDX Monthly - Age of Innocence | On the Case with Paula Zahn - Kidnapped on the 4th of July S9E4 |Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/murder-in-the-rain/exclusive-contentAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

The fates of Frank Carson and his co-defendants are decided, and jurors explain their reasoning. The DA's office is sued for malicious prosecution, but prosecutors stand by their case. An interview with the state's star witness, now out of lockup, raises troubling questions about the state's handling of the case.If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

Defense attorneys offer alternate theories to explain Korey Kauffman's death, and the trial becomes an endurance test. As Frank Carson's health deteriorates, he wonders whether he will live to see a verdict. After more than a year in trial, defendants fear that the jury might give up, forcing a mistrial — and that this is exactly what the DA wants. If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

Dennis Nilsen has many monikers, and he has earned them all through his cruel killings of at least 16 innocent men and boys. Savannah explores Dennis' background and how he struggled with his sexuality, as well as how Dennis lured victim after victim to his apartment to strangle, dismember, and even store various dead bodies. Plus, Savannah examines the multiple times that Dennis could've been stopped and how his own foolishness ultimately led to him being caught and sentenced to life in prison without parole. Love Killer Instincts but hate the ads? Subscribe to the ad-free version here!: https://killerinstinct.supercast.tech/ Get 10% Off by visiting BetterHelp.com/instinct! Download the 5 star-rated puzzle game, Best Fiends FREE today on the App Store or Google Play When you're ready to undo some damage, hit the reset button with the OUAI Detox Shampoo. Go to TheOuai.com and use code KILLER to get 15% off your entire purchase! Listen and subscribe now to ‘The Trials of Frank Carson' on LATIMES.com, or listen and subscribe on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get podcasts! If you have any thoughts on this case or any other case, or just want to get in touch with Savannah about the show, email her at killerinstinctpodcast@gmail.com.  Follow Savannah on IG: @savannahbrymer  Follow Savannah on Twitter: @savannahbrymer   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As a marathon preliminary hearing continues, the defendants face mounting pressure to climb aboard “the witness bus” and cut a deal. Frank Carson hits rock bottom, and offers his co-defendants a way out. The prosecution belatedly reveals a cache of undisclosed evidence — with major consequences.If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

Defense attorney Frank Carson was a rough courtroom brawler, unafraid to accuse police and prosecutors of corruption to win cases. But the disappearance of a small-time thief led investigators to focus on Carson. Was the criminal attorney as violent as his clients...or was it a vendetta by cops and lawyers to bring down their pugnacious foe?  FOR OUR SPOILER-FREE REVIEW OF "THE TRIALS OF FRANK CARSON" GO TO 30:00MINUTE. Two Stanford students proposed a safer way to give smokers their hit of nicotine without the harmful carcinogens of cigarettes: a product that would eventually be called “Juul.” But a series of design flaws, marketing missteps, and a failure to anticipate unintended consequences only made the problem worse. FOR OUR SPOILER-FREE REVIEW OF "THE VAPING FIX" GO TO 1:07:00 In crime of the week: and I've been working like a dog. Click here to get the Crime Writers On After Show, plus more exclusive content, on Patreon.: https://patreon.com/partnersincrimemedia See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Christopher Goffard is a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist with the Los Angeles Times and the host of the popular podcast, “Dirty John.” His current project is another crime related podcast, this time set in Stanislaus County. It's called “The Trials of Frank Carson.” Valley Edition Host Kathleen Schock spoke with Goffard about the podcast and what it has to say about the inner workings of the criminal justice system.

Frank Carson and his co-defendants confront the charges against them. The government cites years of Carson's supposedly authority-hating behavior and his “behavioral control issues.” Interviews and wiretap recordings explore how Carson's wife and stepdaughter, an art student, came to be wrapped up in the case. And former California Highway Patrol Officer Walter Wells endures jail.If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

In today's episode of the Cops and Writers Podcast, we will be discussing fatal motor vehicle accidents with Senior Corporal Frank Carson who is an Accident Reconstruction and Collision Analysis, expert. Carson has over 35 years of law enforcement experience and has personally investigated over 300 fatal motor vehicle accidents. He has numerous accreditations and is an expert witness when testifying in court.  He is also a drug recognition expert and is an instructor for accident reconstruction and driving while impaired courses.Carson also gives tips on how not to get into motor vehicle accidents and we discuss the frank discussion every parent should have with their kids regarding staying safe while driving. We also talk about the promise we as parents should make to our kids promising to pick them up if they are impaired and shouldn't be driving. If you are going to include car accidents in your stories, or you are just curious as to how and why fatal vehicle accidents occur, and how they are investigated, you are not going to want to miss this episode. Enjoy the Cops and Writers book series.Please visit the Cops and Writers website.If you have a question for the sarge, hit him up at his email.Come join the fun at the Cops and Writers Facebook groupSupport the show (https://patreon.com/copsandwriters)

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John’ and ‘Detective Trapp,’ comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.’ This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John’ and ‘Detective Trapp,’ comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.’ This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

After a three-year investigation, Frank Carson and his co-defendants are arrested, accused of a complicated murder-and-coverup conspiracy. Among the accused are three men who worked for the California Highway Patrol. How did an attorney famous for his distrust of local cops stand accused of conspiring with three of them?If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John' and ‘Detective Trapp,' comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.' This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life's work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.Privacy Policy and California Privacy Notice.

The discovery of Korey Kauffman's remains gives the investigation new impetus, and a man named Robert Woody offers a methamphetamine-fueled “confession.” Threatened with the death penalty, he cooperates — and becomes the government's star witness. But his story changes again and again.If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John’ and ‘Detective Trapp,’ comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.’ This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John’ and ‘Detective Trapp,’ comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.’ This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts Dirty John and Detective Trapp, comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, The Trials of Frank Carson. This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him — the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts Dirty John and Detective Trapp, comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, The Trials of Frank Carson. This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him — the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts ‘Dirty John’ and ‘Detective Trapp,’ comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, ‘The Trials of Frank Carson.’ This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him—the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday, May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts Dirty John and Detective Trapp, comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, The Trials of Frank Carson. This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him — the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

One lawyer saw a broken system. But the system saw a vigilante killer. From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts Dirty John and Detective Trapp, comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, The Trials of Frank Carson. This story of power, politics and the law centers around Carson, the famously caustic defense attorney, who dedicated his life’s work to the very thing that has turned against him — the justice system. The first two episodes premiere Tuesday May 25, available wherever you listen to podcasts. http://link.chtbl.com/FrankCarson. Special bonus episodes are available exclusively to L.A. Times subscribers. https://www.latimes.com/frank-carson-podcast.

When a young scrap-metal thief named Korey Kauffman vanishes, local police do not immediately show great interest. Then a parolee named Big Mike Cooley tells a story that gets their attention: Kauffman was last seen venturing onto Frank Carson's property to steal some pipes. Authorities confront Carson and work to build a case against him.If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

Introducing Frank Carson, Stanislaus County's most controversial defense attorney, famous for his high-profile courtroom victories and take-no-prisoners style. A longtime nemesis of local law enforcement, he is representing homicide defendants in the very courthouse where he is on trial for murder himself. If you like podcasts like Dirty John, Detective Trapp and The Trials of Frank Carson, subscribe to the L.A. Times. Subscribers will get exclusive bonus episodes of The Trials of Frank Carson that share the story behind this podcast. We will share interviews with experts who will weigh in on the case and play extra tape that sheds light on important parts of our story. Subscribe today to listen. Go to latimes.com/exclusive-podcasts. Thanks!

From Christopher Goffard, the Los Angeles Times reporter and host behind the hit podcasts Dirty John and Detective Trapp, comes a new eight-episode true crime podcast, The Trials of Frank Carson. The Trials of Frank Carson is a story of power, politics and the law in California's Central Valley. Frank Carson was Stanislaus County's most controversial defense attorney, a wizard with juries and a courtroom brawler with an unapologetically caustic style. He racked up legal wins for decades. He was the terror of police and prosecutors, often accusing them personally of corruption. When a small-time thief disappeared, police — some of them Carson's longtime adversaries — launched a massive investigation into a spectral underworld of street hustlers, junkies and snitches. Carson was charged with murder, accused of masterminding a conspiracy. It would be one of the longest criminal trials in California history, with the flinty veteran of so many courtroom wars on trial for his life.

Where would you hide religious text? Did Natt mean Frank Carson? Who knows all the results of all the elections? Jake Yapp & Natt Tapley find out in today's Date Fight!

Have yourself a merry Bobo Chrimbo and treat yourself to this minidisc archive episode from the 5th December 2000. In it we learn why Liam Gallagher joined the Soldiers of Hell, what happened at the Soldiers of Hell hat party, we plug the radio show rear of the year competition, Frank Carson comes in for 20 questions, and we have a round of The Sausage Link Game. And finally you get to appreciate the long forgotten gem that is Swedish Stars in Their Eyes! If you want to nominate a pop culture icon for the Soldiers of Hell then let us know via a message on Anchor. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/soh/message

Tony Carson is an entrepreneur and investor from Belfast, Northern Ireland.   He's one of those guys who not only has a fascinating career, but also a remarkable personal story.   Growing up in the New Lodge area of North Belfast, Tony watched his father — the late, great comedian Frank Carson — rise to fame and success.   This meant that from a young age, Tony had the opportunity to get a behind-the-scenes glance of how the hospitality business works — and the chance to roll his sleeves up and work!   Later in life, he has gone on to start, manage and own a whole range of his own businesses before turning to the world of investment.   In today's episode we talk about: Tony's early memories The art of negotiation How to balance creativity with business And the greatest challenges/successes he's experienced along the way   This conversation was done in collaboration with Ormeau Baths as part of their Founder Fireside Mini-Series and is a fascinating listen.   Check it out!   //   To see a photo of Tony please visit https://bestofbelfast.org/stories/tony-carson-entrepreneur   Best Of Belfast is Northern Ireland's #1 Interview Podcast. We've shared 100+ hour-long conversations with incredible people from Northern Ireland.   To find out more, or join 'The Producers Club' please visit https://bestofbelfast.org/   Cheers!   — Matt     

The boys bring you a show which is like joining your pals for a chat over a mug of coffee. So put the kettle on, sit down and enjoy the podcast. Steve and Tony talk daily routines, a night out with Frank Carson and The Grumbleweeds, Coleslaw sandwiches, breakfast, gratitude, Modern Family and pets

The snooty sneering of the Oxbridge elite and some comics against popular humour. Variable opinions on The Weirdos and the Alternative Comedy Memorial Society. The talent of Luisa Omielan. The irresistible sexual attraction of Italian comic Giacinto Palmieri. The inability of comics like Michael McIntyre, Frank Carson & Matthew Kelly to stop being themselves. Copstick’s work with Basil Brush and her admiration for the Chuckle Brothers. Coughing John’s failure to visit Amsterdam’s red light district and his attraction to heroin + LSD. The success of one Malcolm Hardee Comedy Award. The BBC’s Appreciation Index. Plus Copstick sings. John’s quote of the week: “Beheading teddy bears! That’s what the public wants!… There was the man who used to eat his brain.” http://www.grouchyclub.co.uk You can also download this audio podcast from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/grouchy-clubs-mostly-about/id977279883 John Fleming posts occasional blogs at: http://blog.thejohnfleming.com

It's been ten years since the release of Guillermo del Toro's haunting fairytale Pan's Labyrinth, a film which was hailed as a masterpiece almost as soon as it debuted and whose reputation has only grown over time. To mark the occasion, Matt and Ed discuss the film's many good qualities, debate its legacy, and what impact it had on del Toro's career. They also get excited about the films debuting at the Toronto International Film Festival, Ed reminisces about the time he got to meet del Toro and almost cried, and Matt reveals how deceased Irish comedian Frank Carson shattered his chances of becoming a professional footballer. 00:00:00 - 00:18:22 - Intro & News 00:18:23 - 00:55:27 - Matt & Ed discuss Pan's Labyrinth 00:55:28 - 00:59:19 - SRS Recommends & Outro

John's 2006 interview with the late Irish comedy legend FRANK CARSON. John was Frank's volunteer driver on one unforgettable night. #FrankCarson #comedian #entertainment #northernIreland

Hello from the Cheshire Plain. Spring is definitely in the air! This episode sees the launch of a new, occasional, series A Postcard From... A prize is available for anyone who can identify the music clips in the postcard! Works in Progress: No work on the Damson Shawl as part of the Caithness Craft Collective Knitalong. Ravelry details are here. I've completed a second bear this year for the Mother Bear KAL/CAL over at the CogKNITive podcast. This one is called Frank, in honour the the recently departed Frank Carson. Woolsack Update: I'm partway through another cushion for Woolsack. Although I described the pattern, I didn't actually name it (shame on me). It is Tilting at Windmills by Woolly Thoughts. Spinning: I'm still spinning the Cheviot I got in the Secret Santa on the UK Spinners board on Ravelry from Shunklies. I'm now over three-quarters of the way through it. A Postcard from...Manchester Whilst writing these show notes, I've made the horrific discovery that my memory card has corrupted, so I only have a few photos that I took on my phone to share, and those do not include the detail from The Hireling Shepherd by William Holman Hunt. So sorry! The Jasperware by Wedgewood on the landing in the Manchester Art Gallery. And the landing itself, looking at the casts of the Parthenon friezes. This is the sign I mentioned when I was outside Affleck's. I took some superb pictures of the theatre-in-the-round structure inside The Royal Exchange, but sadly you'll just have to put up with these two wobbly shots of the same area, to go with the shortened clip (I was just too quiet!) Links: Woolsack; Mother Bear Project; iMake Podcast; Knit A Journey Podcast; Fred Aldous; Purl City Yarns. Music: Rondopolska by Barry Philips, from the album Tråd, available from Magnatune. We have a listeners' map. Please go on over to pop in a pin - I'd love to see where you all are! Feel free to leave a comment here or at http://www.yarnsfromtheplain.blogspot.com/, or email me at yarnsfromtheplain AT googlemail DOT com. We have a Ravelry group here, so come on over to chat. You can find me on Ravelry as talesfromtheplain and on Twitter as talesfromplain (although Tweeting can be sporadic!). TTFN, Nic

On the eve of our final Los Quattros Cvnts show (til September) we gather together with Michael Legge in a pub like the cvnts we are and bang on about cvnty stuff. And Michael forgets that Frank Carson is the celebrity he spotted. Michael! It was Frank Carson!