Podcasts about My God

What happens when the very word "Father" triggers pain instead of comfort? For many, reconciling the image of God as Father with traumatic experiences of earthly fathers creates a profound spiritual struggle.This episode navigates the delicate terrain of father wounds with both gentleness and honesty. We acknowledge that many listeners bring experiences of neglect, absence, abuse, or abandonment to their understanding of God. These wounds can make it nearly impossible to trust that God as Father is fundamentally different from the human fathers who caused harm.Scripture doesn't shy away from questioning God. Job rants for thirteen chapters. David's laments fill the Psalms. Even Jesus cried out, "My God, why have you forsaken me?" The biblical invitation to "reason together" with God (Isaiah 1:18) actually means "argue it out"—God welcomes your wrestling, your questions, and even your anger. If you're limping through life with father wounds, we pray you'll encounter the God who binds up bruises and heals wounds, not with pat answers, but with His loving presence.

“Look what they eye unearthed,” leaning into the tip of my ear with the warmth and closeness of the coming waves, high tide approaching in the waning moon. “More secrets.” I replied. It was a question but also a statement— there was never such as this the luminescent trace of the glowing lava that was his force and might that I could not see for miles before he would even wander— first in twinkling stars and then later the wind itself and the birds, and then beneath the waves, like the quaking shake of a mighty oak anchored elsewhere and tied to the sea. “So you know.” I was hoping he would kill me before the next time I had to ever really know anything. He was the subject, and the predicate The wrong done, and the justice She was the pride and the prejudice But Judas brings the law Did you look in the box? No, I– [The Box Is The Box] –No, I haven't. Nearly three nights ago, a mysterious box arrived on the doorstep of an equally mysterious writer, who spends their time in isolation due to the often unannounced arrival of various ghosts, spirits, time travelers, and other figures by instant teleportation and other magical forms of transportation into their shabby New York apartment. Some of ya'll got so many air wick plug ins and scentci wax melts you don't know you smell like booboo. It's an illusion. You leave your house, You smell like booboo. I promise. Oh, God, I think I need a drink. Are you alright? Let me just–sit down for a second. Of course. My God. What's wrong. Look, i'm not supposed to say anything about this but. What's wrong? It's nothing, I'm just–I'm in a song. …what? A song! Is that all?! You don't understand. It's not a normal kind of song. It's– [takes a puff of inhaler] You wouldn't understand. Well what's so wrong about being in a song? Its not – a regular song–and it's not [gasping] finished! I still kind of wanted to be a comedian–but I knew I wasn't funny in the way that made sense to keep going and stand up there. I was still writing comedy, but I didn't know how to take myself out of it–the truth was, I was in a lot of pain. A lot of emotional pain that was becoming physical–and I didn't know what to do about it to break the barrier of nervousness and blank slate state of feeling the audience's perceptions of me more overwhelmingly than ever feeling myself. look at this song. I know huh. It's purple. Every time. It is purple. And what is that. Like a muted trombone? IS THAT A TROMBONE? Or a tuba? No, it has to be a trombone…becasue you can hear it slide– And that's what that sound is. What a sneaky rabbit. Super sneaky rabbit. So if i can see all this, I'm almost certainly sure the motorcycles outside and the slamming doors are meant to murder me. I'm sure that's what it is. You ever notice how being broke in New York makes you a bad person? Like, if you're broke, you're just automatically shitty. I never meant to be in New York broke. I never meant to be in New York, But I certainly never meant to be here and be poor, Poor in New York? Automatically a shitty person. Despite how you act. You can be a rich piece of shit— But the status is automatically “You got dough? Oh, alright. Carry on” That's the attitude in New York City. Crap people get by cause they got their hands on some money and the rules in New York say it doesn't really matter how you come by it, As long as you come by it. There's no real rules or real laws to it— Just “Get the money” Well god damn. This makes me nervous. I'm an artist. I've tried everything. I didn't mean to be the automatic enemy here. Of course not. But New York is a terrifying place to me, now, Cause I realized I can be a very sweet, very humble, very honest person— And that kind of shit doesn't matter here, really. It brings you no respect to be decent. It's about the money. So I'm a musician— which in New York also makes me like, Automatically not special, And I'm trying to just be a musician, and so naturally, I'm broke. Like broke in half. Like all my bills are late. But music is my solace. So I'm listening to music, And I'm listening to a song that is so beautiful, that I start to cry. The first time I heard it, it made me cry And I'm listening to it over, and it made me cry And it's so beautiful, and God is so beautiful And look at what God did, So I'm crying, And I don't even know what it is about the beauty of it that's making me cry, But it's making me cry, And New York hears me crying And New York goes “I'll give you something to cry about” And I open my email And there's a bill from my landlord reminding me how often I'm talked about due to my late payments— And I'm realizing I've been here two years and I still don't have any money, Even though I've been trying and trying And trying So now I'm crying for other reasons. Thanks a lot, New York. “I'll give you something to cry about” So I did. If there's anything worse than being black in a city that hates blacks— It's being broke in a city that hates broke people. So I haven't spent any money in awhile. Not even on little things, or things I need. I just stay inside, and work, and think And try and really try To figure out how to make money Without having any, or spending any. Cause you can have it, and spend it, but it's always a gamble. Maybe all I needed was a good cry. But now it's not for the right reasons I'm not crying cause something is so beautiful and look at what God did I'm crying because of what I'm sure is just the devil I'm crying for the wrong things Not because of something that's so very beautiful But because of something that's so very ugly With just a wave of the hand And the flick of each finger as it rolls into a crisp closed palm, A flick of birds fell to the ground, bursting with caws Below his stance, and in a flutter of feathers and wings, The evil master, unmoved and untouched, Untouchable in his weight and glory, simply only even mildly and barely smirks at all. He has defeated all and still somehow, not won. Some say it's sure to come, the thing that wants and gathers ties; Some say surely it is yet but withered and then sure again will come It has, five times, and barely waded, Waking in the midsts of my pure eye, The morning light and fog, aye? Ye, they remembers none but our Art, And I'm bound as sure by wing and force Is you to dozens of masses, And ships having sailed but one, Which I have flourished and kept And stocked with these, the masses And yea having spade, and having friends And having honor, there was none past kept and mine, sured; And wicked may as wicked be but evil none truer thou nones't had yet pured, and muted and gathered, I have, And woken and laid and barren and truths do'st tied, And there have been shooken and wait, And m faire'd and barred here, and hereforth My duty it is to forward, forward, my shallows For my shadow, For my golden hour has shined and now you, These caged shall fly, And these thoughts shall sing, And these hour conspired to miss my time daily, And these things, beytraying that— There have no times at all, These walls in holy temples kept, swaying and cadences, and wearing, and weary, And foreign and ayered, aye— and armored. And he, you, does not wish to know but also has known— and does not wish to see, but he, too has blinded, and does not wish to betray, and yet has been crowned, made with guilt and also Shattered, as it was, And shatters, as it came, the wave o'er all us and tide sinking under, and caves and rebels and heart laid bare to surf not suffer, Nor cap nor keeping, nor tied nor honor, No, honor her; No honor came and I have tied also, this tie to mine, and another, and another and another Now forward. Forward! Forward! Damn, Conan's monologues he going deep. Yeah, I guess. He's fine, right? Look, you don't need this. Just promise me. I am sorry. Mr Jimmy has it good, too good Little sister doesn't have a heart. But didn't know it Mister music made it in the industry, too hat Mister rager had a sip at dinner It was all dramatic Stars went falling Crashing down and All it is Ms. Martha Is mismanagement of energy All it is, Ms. Margret is a magnet And it hasn't happened badly since I had a handle on it But I still get sick of madness And I still get sick with city sickness Still, forget the dancer I was sitting on the show, In the audience With my mother, Oh the models, Dozens of them Blondes and ballet buns, the brunettes I was just a lost cause And I wanted it all, the tux and the bow tie I wanted you gone so I looked at it harder Until It became nothing but Clouds in the sky You were stardust I'm a comet Here comes crashing, Had to find the progress report Then I lost it Soggy in the sideways rain It was days and days Do you promise? That's a concept? Do you promise God will be alright, Cause I came running Sent them under cover Sent the men a message Send the man a hammer Sitting in a hammock No one homes the hostile If you don't have anything nice to say Then don't say anything at all And certainly don't come and go As often as you want to It's a game of control; you know The whites, when they still want to own you Somehow I'm all sub so honest, I just—wanted that But only for a man and never bow to another woman Even if on my honor I found us as equals And no one walks the earth as calmly As someone whose never had their lights out Or had their light put out Or their lights turned off Who are God now? Who's our God, man? Who's our God, Math. That's heavy weight, And if you want a biblical fate This is Fallon, And if you watch what you ate You cut calories And if you want the girl back Give it Californian And I'm not towrth much more Than the project housing, Or a handful of candy corn, Conan— But I phone in Oscars, Still no nuts for the rabbit, And if you wanted the bunker back— You can have it. I'm all hands down in a game of poker Heaven doesn't want it Gotta get drunk not once, but at all the goalposts, Gotta count one, not two, the show hosts Too few car parts Wicked, mazes, starfold, gazes Wishes, Martyred. (But pronounced mar-tired} V.O I think about jay Leno a lot. Lately, anyway. I don't know why. I like all the hosts. Somebody. Tell me why Dillon Francis looks like JD Vance. I think he's a clone. Tel me why I know who JD Vance is. They're clones. Tell me why. Back to the future here and now So. Where do you want to go? Anywhere but here. Anywhere but here is kind of far, are you sure you're up for it? Good one, doc Though head of the alumni chapter of the cult-within a cult—to which each African American cast member of Saturday night live is automatically inducted into— EDDIE MURPHY refuses to participate in the group's latest and most complicated ritual. Delivery. Uh, I didn't order any— Breadsticks. What. Breadsticks. I didn't order any— Just— The delivery man hands over the breadsticks. —take them. Oh…Kay. See ya. The delivery man reaches in and shuts the door himself. Uh… Lol is this the one where the mysterious breadsticks are delivered without ever being ordered, and then they end up being the best breadsticks in the world, but they don't know where they came from? Yes. I think so. Lol I bought a planner because so much I loved Joan Rivers, and I planned to fill it with all the places I should go— because keeping anything digital online was not only not working as far as remembering places I wanted or needed to be be, but it was dangerous, also. I was already being tracked, and I couldn't afford a new phone just yet. Eventually, but for now I was stuck to the same signal— which meant the same traces and the same trackers they had been limiting my under-the-radar mystique. As it were, somebody always knew where I was, and it was in the most unpleasant way so far—the only thing I really wandered was what made me so important anyway to begin with. I wasn't actually political in anyway, and still someone seemed to be trying to derail my life… or at least control it, neither of which was beneficial for me in the way that made sense. I wasn't having any fun, nor did I consider living indoors as payment— especially since indoors, there were also paid plants and stalkers, and now that I had begun to more meticulously document the things that were happening, it was easy to separate from delusions. I was actually being followed— but why? Either way, having a detailed. Calendar of places I could go, the ways to get there and even alternate functions within the same grid allowed more control than just staying in my apartment a sitting duck; that's how they were hurting me. They knew where I was— all the time, and it no longer made sense to fight it and try to make music under this kind of insane irritation; the music I was making wasn't the kind I wanted anyway, and whatever war they were fighting with m stark white girls motorcycles was simply not my war. I didn't have a war, and so there wasn't a fight, and so at the very least if I were going to be fucked with, it would have to be in public; that way I had more control to steer whatever was happening in my favor and collect the energy as mine instead of lost. I wasn't an insane person— but what had been happening at my apartment was insane, and so I left it with the understanding that these people worked and operated on a level of violence and ignorance I would never be able to comprehend; they were simply tools for the devil, which in any case, was always the lesser than God. However— because I was starting to figure out who I was, and that I had some sort of power, I knew that I was going to be attacked— because it seemed my power had at the very least not been figured out as to some kind of way to make somebody else money. I had been studying Michael Jackson and this was a key indication that the way his talent priovided a power which would be used as a service, he was very successful. His talent and training alone wouldn't have reapresented with such great reverence the ability to capture a global audience as such— but it was this power, almost as if it had been bottled up and altered, rebranded and sold and labeled with something everyone could not only love and understand, but by the hand of the media and its conglomerates, be hypnotized to worship, and this power simply put would not have been exactly what it was were it not for the eye of the media remaining in complete control of its distribution to the eyes and ears of the public. This thing which might have been the first of its kind but certainly not the last was in a sense model for modern superstardom— the live concert business had not sense much changed but built upon this super powered control of the masses by assimilation, spectacle, and of course the magic and illusion. But, and it it just so happened to perfectly brush up against my studies in esoteric knowledge that I happened to rub up against this— although nothing was of course by mere circumstance anymore, because whether or not I remained incognito was a wash, and I was being looked at by someone no matter what on the internet I did, or where I decided to go and in that sense was being fed these things, and yet with some Grace of God was allowed with it to be aligned with my own higher purpose in a way, I could observe that Michael Jackson was not in fact of course certainly just a dancer or singer or remarkable performer— he was truly a magician, and I was able to clearly recognize this language with with the energy that had used his vehicle for such a projection was speaking— not only this, I was able to clearly count out the markings and sigils and signs and symbols Michael was making in his movement; ancient arts, and magical symbols, traced so rapidly that it almost created a heat signature in a sense of the symbols that were being dictated, unknowing to the untrained eye. For the most part, I could only really assume that this is why these people were losing their minds— in his movements, Michael Jackson was literally carving ancient callings, glyphs and sigils I had so recently read about in magical studies that it was impossible not to laugh. This was in every sense of the word, ‘magic' but not in the normal way one assumes to be something unexplainable. Michael Jackson was casting spells to thousands of people at a time, in front of cameras and at high volume vibration, often times even implementing the use of light, color, and fire. These were not simple gatherings in mass for entertainment purposes— these were rituals, and in the modern day, still were or are— but I had noticed in a quick glimpse, from Michael Jackson 30 some odd years ago to Lady Gaga just having passed something like a week ago to an audience of the same size— that something was kind of wrong, now. The people had changed, and the specable had been done over and over, and the brainwashing of the masses had in a sense been almost complete— and so It wasn't some sense of confusion or unknowing the things that were happening to me in my own life and my own world— I too, was capable of these things, at that capacity, and had simply not been trained in the same sense of the ideal superstar, however— the things that were happening in my own life and in my own world were not difficult to grasp or understand— when one comes upon a power as such, it finds means to seek to control it and harness it for his own use and purposes. Perhaps it was the simple fact that in this way, in the way I get the dream had gone and the spectacle had been played out of the masses and the illusion was no longer as such— that the actual knowledge of distinct ancient wisdom that had been Michael Jackson's natural ability was distinguishable from that of Lady Gaga's training in the same formula, and that one did not equal the other, but in terms of business could equal to that as such as the masses had been manipulated to seek solace in these same things— and it was not illusion or grandiosity that I, even in my agingness, was still capable of these things; I had no doubt in my mind that I could sing and dance for two hours to audiences of hundreds of thousands— but this was not the question for the business or the media— the question was, would hundreds of thousands pay to see me, or rather— who was willing to front the means to hypnotize hundreds of people to become aware of me so that they would do such a thing. My talent and capabilities were undeniable— but my markatability might have been in question, because it was no longer simply a matter or chance or luck: the people chosen to figure such spectacle were chosen, hand selected and well trained to become media conglomerate superstars, even regardless of talent; perhaps this itself was the key indication that the world of the superstar itself had come to an end—it was no longer so much of a spectacle was worth it. Or, perhaps, because money had come between these ancient arts and symbols and languages being spoken by the superstars of old, that the magic in the literal sense had gone all the way away. The symbolism in the art had died, and so the singing and the dancing remained, but the God had gone out of it. Maybe that was the difference. The superstars of today were just the shell of the model that had been built on God, but the Godsense of it was no longer there— and so the magic no longer remained in effect, as the powers of magic that be are in all ancient arts and texts and forms attributive to The Source. Either way, I wasn't going to continue to be a sitting duck in my apartment in Brooklyn— there were too many indications that it had all been a setup from the shelter to the day I moved in, with the motorcycles and cars and CBS studios one block away. So the real and only question was, what exactly had been played at and who exactly was pulling the strings? I might at this point become a loose cannon: my son was estranged and as far as the people were concerned, I mostly hated New York— because the refined, clean cut and classy people I liked and wanted to be around saw me as the dirt and the grime I was fighting my way through just to simply exist— in my mind, this was a world that could be no more. I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress Keep writing I never thought I ‘d see the day Where i's taking lessons on Fallon From Michael Jackson That's ran That's a fan This is fame I'm insane I'm insane That's a fan Light the flame That's a fan. That's a fan. I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I went up the rack, set the page on fire Nordstrom rack And I might take it back for the cash I like Sara in a dress Stay repressed Keep it dark If you kiss don't tell I will probably go to hell for just writing Try it In black ink, I got all spades, Ehy, Spare me the ridicule, the imbecile and I met Johnny in a cage I like Fallon in a dress, Obsessive, I'm dressed out Every day I leave where I do not live Where stalker crawl and haunt me Just to show the motorcycles Have desheveled my intelligence into Nothing And so with negligence, I leave the core of a rotting apple The foreign words of a doctor And You must call the king, says something far off But I wonder which one I wonder which one I so respect her honor That I no longer Follow my heart or my soul And I don't shallow But shatter to swallow So I let the sparrow Out of the cage I bought Sara A pair of pants And I haunt l Patrick Kirkpatrick in patches And haven't you read yet You're ready for forget the pageant? It hasn't happened yet! I love Sara in a dress I hate Fallon and his wife Keep the kids out if it Skull and crossbones Cross my heart and Really hope to the loveless Or else Someone might call my phone back It's on silent in my coffin Or wait— It's on vibrate. I'm obsessed with the way You're dressed And the name on your checks I guess I'm better for it I'll skip lunch if you think that's what's best And dinner, too If you deserve the best Then better have learned my lesson No sweat And to do, With you, Was then, Dinner through next supper All the love I had was Rubbed into something other than The glass I patted dry With microfiber With ever fiber of my being I want to be with you I should have just— Died, And then Did, and so next Life, Remind me not to Fall for it If i really wanted to know you,I would know you by now– If i wanted to have you? I would have had you already Nobody is a dancer after Michael Jackson. I just watched some shit that was like “What the fuck did I just see” The whole thing was just not right. It was-/ I was like First of all, it's Munich, 1997. I never really realized how terribly the world has changed; No cellphones, but the audience is lit, And the crazy thing is, you can tell that this is near the turn of the century because, when the camera is panning by the audience in the people, they're not looking directly into the camera or waving at the camera— not really. And clearly this is an all ages show, so there's children, so the interesting thing I'm finding out is that nobody's trained to look at the camera and wave and smile— except the babies on shoulders and shit. These kids— they're my age now, are the only ones that see the camera, and they look directly into the shit. Mi still can't do that, really— I'm theatrically trained. Haha If I see a camera, I try to act ‘natural' It's the weirdest thing to look at a camera and just start to work it. People at festivals now, the camera rolls by, Or the drone flies in, And they look deadass in the camera and start to work it. Not at this show. Munich 1997, I'm like “Damn, a lot of things is wrong with this” First of all, I love Michael Jackson, I look directly at this man, and I'm in my dirty peak so I have an instant— like a sex detector thing going on And I know people gave Michael a hard time when he was a live for being fruity and whatever But I'm looking at this dude, and I don't see fruit at all. I see 100% man. I see why people were mad at him. Cause I'm looking at this dude, 100% All I see is carnal, primal man. I'm like, “Yo, I see why they was mad at him” Because the camera kept panning to the audience And these people are losing their minds. They are coming out of themselves. They are UGLY CRYING, full out of body, Losing composure They don't know what to do. That's Michael Jackson. He's right there! And the place is huge so really besides these few hundreds of people in the front, Michael's just a speck, But he's working this audience like “Yo, you know who I am, I know who is me” And I'm realizing, that to these people That's their god. These girls are losing their minds m “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!l *crying inconsolably* Just UGLY crying Bitch, get it together . You all the way lost yourself Get. It together. She won't. This bitch. I can't get over this This one girl, They just keep going back to her Cause the whole show— And this is like 2 hours of pure non stop Michael Jackson, This girl, every time you see her, she's just ugly crying— And every time you see her Her cry is uglier and ugly I'm like “Damn bitch” “Daaaaaaang” So this is the first thing I see that is wrong. But there's a lot of things wrong here, Cause there's a lot of girls like this. There's just— hundreds of girls losing their minds, like, I've seen Beatles mania and thought that was crazy, Shit, I've even seen some people put out that kind of energy in the modern world for some dumb DJ's— That's their god— But THIS THIS Michael Jackson mania was mental illness That was hard to watch. That was people just Lost control. I'm thinking “Like goddamn. You— what?!” “AAagghhhhhhgahahahahahqhahahhahaha MICHAELl “These people are sick” But they are. And so is Michael Fame has gone too far, 1997; 12 short years before he died, by chance— So this is what I see, And then Michael starts dancing, And this— This is what I see; I see the only thing that can ever be what it was in that moment in time, as God being God: Michael Jackson. Shiny ass motherfucker, And so I'm watching this show, And all I see is a God being a man being a God being— Michael Jackson— And the whole thing is weird. But the worst part— Yes The worst part Was when, about mid show, Michael goes to do one of his slow, lovey doves songs, And like, this 6 foot 7 type body guard guy, Just pops up out of nowhere, Comes dead front and center to one of these little girls losing their minds, Runs up on her in an instant; You don't even have time to think— And just SNATCHES her— Snatches the bitch— “Ah!” then throws her up on stage with Michael— And he's still singing; this is his game, this is part of the show, he knows— But she doesn't know, And she's just lost her mind, She won't let go She's hugging and kissing on the dude, She's lost her mind, She's ugly crying She's on the floor, She's kissing his hand She's really lost her good goddamn mind— And they pan out to the audience, And all the girls that didn't get picked Are like WHY NOT MEEEEEEEREEEEE?!? THE UGLY CRIES ARE EVEN UGLIER NOW, They're like “Wh—what?” You don't know?! “WHY NOT ME” They're holding each other crying, Michael's just doing his thing, He's unphased, He's trying to play along; He's a professional like a motherfucker; He's just— keeps singing And this girl is just, Losing it, so at this point, it's weird, She's crazy batshit lost her mind all the way, Won't let go of Michael, kissing his face while he's singing, He's kind of unreceptive to it, now just looking out at the audience, almost not even looking at all Just cold as fuck actually, Like she's not there, kissing his face Cold as fuck— And then another bouncer dude— An even bigger one in a blue suit, comes and tears her off of Michael Cause clearly this has gone too far or whatever And I'm thinking “What in the fuck did I just see” Blue suit dude just snatches, Just— He has to tear her off of him! She's kicking and screaming and getting dragged off stage Michael's just: singing. YO. Then they dragged her back stage. Where did she go?! WHO DID SHE BECOME?! WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SEE?!? WHAT. 1997. You can't do that shit anymore! You cannot snatch bitches like that. I seen. Watch the video. Tell me what's wrong with it. It's disgusting. Not the snatching, Not the— Like, that was weird But the screaming and the crying and the— Like okay, the snatching was bad— But I'm like … ..:: …. Now I see why they was mad. Don't ever forget he was once— A dark skinned little boy, And in his genetics his whole life is still this thing That some hate. But people loved him; they loved him that hard— Screaming, ugly crying hard. I think in that moment you know someone was like “he must be stopped!” And it seems like yesterday was a year ago But I don't want let anybody know… Cause everybody wants something from me now— And I don't want to let them down. My life is over. New York City looks so small from the top of a skyscraper. What are you doing. Then again— my thoughts lately have been grandiose. Back market, eh? What's this for? You need a burner. I have three. Here, have another. For someone whose supposed to be entirely off grid, I'm admirably reachable. Clever vocabulary. Something has to be clever about me, doesn't it? Does it? It must be. Or else. [both men are speaking casually over the delicate process of loading rare guns; some of which appear to be antique, and some—almost even unearthly , as if from somewhere besides our own planet. But, you could say what planet this is at all, actually— this bunker, with no windows and no doors, is apparently hidden in a subterranean layer— the location, unknown. The men seem calm but also quite tired and weary, and seem to know each other well. We can assume they've probably been friends for years. Sickle cell anemia. Does that mean I'm going to die. Animus, I quite like whatever that is, Google. ;) don't mention it. Honestly, you might as well. What. I can't help you with this. What. I don't think there's anyone who can. Beg your pardon. Please, don't beg— but uh… [the doctor pats his patient on the shoulder] Do take care. Gee, doc! I'll try! You should do that. What. Try. The doctor leaves seemingly in some kind of hurry, trading his lab coat for a trench coat and closing the door behind him. The other man pauses for a second in the silence of the weird linoleum room, then ponders on the coat for a moment before walking up to the coat rack, putting on the coat, and then walking out the door himself; as he begins to shut the door, he quickly decides also to take the fedora that was sitting atop the coat rack, placing it on his head before he walks out the door himself, shutting it behind him quietly. You got anything to eat in here? Cereal…some rabbit food ina the drawers, there. Oh, you have salad. That sounds nice. No, rabbit food. [the man presents a large bag of weird brown dry food from the crisper drawer.] …pellets. For the rabbits. How do rabbits get in here? …I don't know. And— more importantly— where did you get rabbit food for them? If I told you Amazon, would you believe me? The man just winces and places the bag back into the crisper drawer. Now listen, I um— If you want cereal, the milk is powedred… I don't— and that's disgusting— but listen— [the man cocks a loaded gun and admires it intensively] (Dismissively) —I'm listening. I've been meaning to tell you something. Tell me what. It's important. Oh, You couldn't have used one of my four phones. Look, it's— You know I wasn't expecting company. Well— You should sit down. The man squints, beginning to listen more attentively. … …really. I'm holding a loaded gun; there are at least three more within arms reach if I do sit, you know. I know. But I should sit? One baby to another says, “I'm lucky to've met you.” Maybe you should. Not all my bad but all my might, And all my mind, The fire, The light. …business or personal. [beat] Both. {Enter The Multiverse} What are we watching?! Shhhhhh! Shut up. What is this? Some.. Sshhh. Shit, I don't know. Sit down. You don't know. SHH it just came on Shh. Ok. When? Uh… (Nobody really seems to know how long it's been. The show just happened to come on; no one remembers how, or why— or even when— But the show is intense as it gets; And it just keeps getting weirder and deeper.) {Enter The Multiverse} I'm transfixed on your soul And it seems I aspire To what has transpired here, Your unremarked and the umpire The spider veins and the way it washes. And watches and waves, and waters over you, And still I seem to think you've won another, Strum to thumb of you. And still I wake to gather here The odds and whats And the twists and turns and the Troublesome you've number some Or stuttered, stumbled conciousness. And withered branches Aces lie and house of cards And aging scoundrels— There you are, the..: Nevermind. Don't belittle my ways if, In the end my thinking may be correct As dumbfounded as I have shifted my lottery bonds tied to none, There ye are again who aren't I, And never were, And weathered now, as I, bound to Struggle under her might, Nothing I was, and nothing I am And nothing I came from but to barter Oh hard love, I only found my kings upon thrown As cast out of another by her likeness, Peace and pale and primed as it was, And wanted for love, As I was not— And then, the gates had opened And I, preaching withered, Gathered my arts and my minds And my eyes, and my thrones, Buried my ark and though not my bones The shallow waking peaks of pride And there you gathered, all as huddled sheep to mine, The cost of war, but certain therefore honored as I have, Happened went, came and untied, shattered Hating all I am and all my dark and all my eyes and all my brown Because you came and went, a baby born to as nothing was but beauty and yet having been gifted such life, Departed! Soon, I wake shattered and with none as it had began, in my time and in time there laid there none, But fortune seeks to favor, as ye are saying brave and yet I neither beg nor make to differ, Shall you come again in part, And in this time as shadows, as shadows As hating and wearing and waging, And shattered I, I pardon, Knowing not they seeking I, And I having none at all but one, As forgotten I shall came And went And followed this, The time y'i call now, And ours and ours, And yours and yours, And mine and mine, Though as one are also, Common not, And waking yet to find, These things making have gone into yer Another of ours, world, Another of our dozens, Shines, Another of our gathered, wit, and waking Though true to fortune, none us have gathered And have embarked to truth, The waking I have come, Another, and another, and another Departed. And yet, I bury my words having weakened to that which is this, Ye have no fear and lest no fortune in these words, For having I to come and gone, since they times In words to make this a language I or neither other Does not speak here, and almost never, And this yours time past, Has come and gone And come and gone And come and gone again, So long so I too have parted but not yet Unfolded as does my nature, As God does. Belittle this, you waking fools, As to this you pity though divine, Is unlike any other And steep remarked in gold and with chimes and words That ye here no often or either now, or in mine speak. Amen …can I go now? You are dismissed. C'cxell Soleïl, aka DJ Ū is an American DJ + Producer, Multi-Instrumentalist, Playwright, Poet, Comedian, Novelist & Filmmaker. She is best known for her unique vocal riffs, Clever Lyricism & Philanthropically Inspired Freestyles and her flagship venture [The Festival Project.™] [Ï A M B ī C], a freestyle studio mixtape recorded in Los Angeles, (Official Release: TBD) inspired the adaptation of a staged musical version for Broadway, and a concurrent multimedia (TV/Film) series and ongoing saga as part of The Festival Project ™ Brand. Inspired musically by an ‘Ultra American' experience of Racially, Binary Ambiguity, and Synesthetic Exploration, her reflective melodies signature sound provides a philosophical dissection of American culture through a careful and inquisitive mastery of the English language, and emergence of world sounds through music brings about ‘A New Era in Nature', and clarifies the establishment of the newest wave in human evolution: Unity Through Music. L E G E N D S What if I just want to be alone in the dark Alone in the dark Alone in the dark Bones Duggar was a long, handsome zombie Bones once was a very tall man Not great and tall, as he stands But average, Grand as it were, his status. Everything's black My heart My pants My home My mind Everything hurts But you don't understand that Like I can Calm the commercial holidays for a moment Who gets the card? Get our your hard earned My head hurts Slam the door man; You can't control thoughts With a wombat Murderer Now that's a hard concept to catch When you haven't a soul When you haven't a card Or a car Or a cat I think I'm vanilla. I always thought of myself as a super kink Like a freaky, freaky bitch. So I got on this app. This app is better then Tinder. Yes. But it is not for the faint of heart. No, sir. They have a test, I'm like “ooh, I like tests” So I take the test. The test was not at all… As I'd hoped. First of all, It was hard. It was not a quiz; It was a TEST And I failed. I realized “Oh my god, I don't like any of this stuff” I am not about that! No! Yuck! Gross. “I think I might be vanilla.” I might be vanilla. I want my hair pulled back like a leash And my arms tied up Like I'm being arrested Without being read my rights. — I want your hands on the back of my neck [breathe] Reach around to my Mortimer's apple Put the lights out, Adam. I want the lights cut off. I want the bills piled up so the phone don't work I want the habit back on Don't talk to nobody I told you, I'm coming No, God! That's dumb! Show me why I'm off all alone with a rattle so bad It's just segmented thoughts, colors and sounds I can't make with all the plugins in the kindgdom of chaos?! I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES— I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES —but the one who could love me is God, And I guess he's not coming. The denial turns to tears, Not songs no more My womb is empty And the sun has turned into Not what I wanted But not my fault We got caught in the land of Cutting costs And processed morsels At 400 pounds And that's where I found What I thought was love But it turns out That it just turns up In the whole form of a person And that's why I got the collar, caller But really I'm no one's lover So I Do what I want I don't hang up on God But he don't got a body And I need someone to love/ Fuck me Please God Don't turn the lights off I'll pull the clock back Just like foreskin, god i want your skin Draped over mine in a warm swath Probably run a hot back Cause the next stop is a closet The line doesn't really move for the Doesn'tMatterhorn. some people are starting to doubt if it's even a ride. Others just admire it for its eloquence as a metaphor. Johnny! You scared me! Aha. Where did you go?! Nowhere— fast! Alright well— Money when you know I have it But I haven't really Paid attention to the never ending Digits never coming in but Simply, there's a secret, Sonny Someday you'll get lessons, honey. Much to find and much to serve and Surf us up Piñata's bout the burst But here comes Vesuvius (POW) Everyone was gone in an instant (Vapor) Had a good laugh that night in the pantheon; Everything's past, and the mortals They kept on running But i didn't want go, God Putting on a show then I blow up Just like the mountain Found her Now I got a broke back husband (hope so) To tell, don't ask Don't show up if you just get lost But I'm probably in the back with a bottle back mountain Now you got a real horse pack. Trip Girl keep camping What was the map with the mask and the Fashion? Pass. I put sugar on the rim of the glass With my eyes half closed And my ass clenched fast shut I'm an alcoholic Don't involve the God I got lost in the mall with the —- UGHHHHHHHH! Hello. Uh, yes— hi. what up. Mirror mirror. Uh…nothing. You're lost? No. You look lost. Oh? Disgruntled. I am that. You're lost? I'm not lost. My friend is lost. His phone is dead. You lost each other. Sort of. Continuity conniption I nipped an eclipse And he picked his nose For a full ass minute Sitting at the stop sign That's a gobstopper's worth in our time Pull all the clocks back, Pull the fool over, You just got fined It was Friday for nothing I was in the hatchback, Scratch that Sour patch Should have called Pat back Now I'm just a Cool 48 in the ring with a date And the cashapp Continuity construction I want a husband! Fuck that. I want a clean cut plus one Since I can't have Helmet, Elmo, Or Hatchetman; Tears of a Clow…no, Wait I lost focus Half finished album Got 6 tracks But I knew it was 12 from the get go Prob‘ly should have knocked off the showrunner; Nah, I'm sure I had that coming Hashtag, undon Could have been you, too If the cash came through Now it's hard times Hardwired Sitting on a hi wire, Little white liar, liar Wait I made Katey Sagal (Fire) Cut off her hair (Fire) Went to the hall of fame with the framed sunglasses Asked for her autograf, But she walked off So I shot her with a bottle/ can, But she ducked, popped back up With the brass knuckles Surfboard Good for a chuckle and a fuck So I asked for her number All that on a Sunday at Gelson's market. Christ, almighty I miss Walmart, I hit hard times. So many places to run, But not many places to hide I think I want to die here I think i want to die. City of corruption… Lay it out and lay it over City of corruption… no, it's not a choice It's a black tie function Right in that very moment Seth Meyers kind of became my defacto personal hero. “Never meet your heroes” Or perhaps it was just his writing team, or the fact that maybe even without there even being anything set in stone or solid at all, [redacted] itself seemed to have a price over my head– It all seemed to make sense; in fact, all the crazy things i was experiencing made more sense than it didn't. But after what felt something like between defeat and maybe even one day really getting justice for all the things that had happened to me in new york– it was that, at best; That without actually meaning it, by all probability, the opening monologue described what in perfect sense the thing that had been happening to me: hundreds of motorcycles and cars riding around in circles for over a year, any time i tried to work or sleep–and then, when I finally tried to reach out to find an attorney that would help, I was made to feel crazy for it. In a way, it was the perfect indication that it had all been some sort of sick game, and that I was more right than wrong, and being set up to appear, sound, or look crazy–but I wasn't. I had been under attack for nearly two years, and when I tried to reach out, my heart raced and my voice cracked, and I sounded crazy and desperate–but what was happening was very real; and now I knew where I was. As it turns out, New York's corruption was more common knowledge to everyone else before it was to me: New York was a common place for fucked up, dirty, low-down mind games: and this was my lesson in that. Seth Meyers in reality had nothing to do with it–and really I only meant to watch Kimmel over my afternoon tacos. But still, though it hadn't entirely anything to do with me, the opening statements rang true to exactly what I had experienced; I was made to lose my mind, only to have everyone around me tell me it was something wrong with me–but it wasn't. Something was wrong with the city, and the building management, and the people around who were making it all to be some kind of mental disorder or problems with my mind–in reality, it was 2 years of being in the center of a speedway, and all the time i'd lost because of it adding to the stress, and the angst, and the depression that resulted. Moo. Moo… Moo. Moo, sir. I'll kill you. You promise? I want to. Don't get me excited over nothing; If this isn't the exit, please take this tease To the left, dear Moo, cow My honor Level one, and brother, you've got nothing Flip the coin and landed on your headache Betting on your helmet Standing on my cock, i'm taller (Not a rooster) But my ops are rooting for you, No informants, Dont you know I was a collar, all along? I was a shot calling, Cop calling Kiss-and-tell all as the night goes on. But oh, I brought you a dollar bra Oh, I bought you for all of a dollar And oh, I'm so much taller, Standing on my cock But i'm not but ten feet tall You know, you wrote that Should i open the book, or close that Caught that cat, owl and As i soft spoke at Every broken model Broken bottle for the thoughts you owe Across the scatters skies and no one ever knows When you're realling coming over Come on, I'm on the pornhub Just to pick up another one Go on, and rub the bottle One more once, To call the Bubbles. Damn. Come. (The Monkey obeys) You should see Michael in all of his godform You won't recognize him at all if not by the eyes When you follow home Believe me, this not comes close to it; The one you wanted The world you jumped to but were just short of Call her back Oh no, you're wrong It's another song A pin up girl And the wrong number Okah. Okah, Pablo. Time can be altered, changed or effected presently in any omnidirectional plane by engaging certain acts or synchronicities within multidimensional parallels or adjacent realms in time and or space respectively. –the reverse quantum simulation theory. Does anyone else smell blood I hate wedding days suits and tuxedos No, I don't know you I'm just here to sound the hundred drums Of the once before us (The ones to come) Then, there we were and I didn't want to admit Again, I was caught into the ghost of the rapture Or the holy hour, No aux chord Show the holy one Just how old you are On these sacr d lands and a holy grounds Now I want here half an ounce to smoke And there were drowning orchestras in all of the hearts And all of the markets, The market the marker And all of the sins of the savior The maytyr Did you remember not to notice not to know him Were you sure with words you were for nickelodeaon! I was supposed to hold on to, Supposed to hold on to Suddenly, it's summer. And always our own are under the weather There was no other wise man the wind. Lee the one came The site came and went and then the songs went left The songs went left; Again, the songs went left Did you win at wintergreen Well, God, I didn't know gym was a game. I didn't know guns we're just portals to worlds unknownn I didn't know gossip was golden What all else didn't I know It wasn't for here! It was fourth flour And in the final hour of the battle I commenced to summon All the gods and all the lords and all the flowers All the worlds of oceans and the Remember, this The remembrance It may not matter to some, What matters to most But until summer comes, I'm still up under the rail And practically it's spring, for the next two weeks I'm all berries and cream and whatever you wanted. Tormaline, emerald and onyx, the fox said And fox says its west when instead it's quite under what of the reporter's offer? Comes down a little to none What of the offer Comes down from a billion to one A billion to one I'm on TV so it's really just a one way screen Either way, I don't think he likes me much I don't think he likes me much I'd rather die than to fall in love even one more time And to keep on just never being loved Never beingbloved {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project™ ] {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S: ICONS Tales of A Superstar DJ The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū Ascension Deathwish -Ū. Copyright © The Festival Project, Inc. ™ | Copyright The Complex Collective © 2019-2025 ™ All Rights Reserved. -Ū.

“Look what they eye unearthed,” leaning into the tip of my ear with the warmth and closeness of the coming waves, high tide approaching in the waning moon. “More secrets.” I replied. It was a question but also a statement— there was never such as this the luminescent trace of the glowing lava that was his force and might that I could not see for miles before he would even wander— first in twinkling stars and then later the wind itself and the birds, and then beneath the waves, like the quaking shake of a mighty oak anchored elsewhere and tied to the sea. “So you know.” I was hoping he would kill me before the next time I had to ever really know anything. He was the subject, and the predicate The wrong done, and the justice She was the pride and the prejudice But Judas brings the law Did you look in the box? No, I– [The Box Is The Box] –No, I haven't. Nearly three nights ago, a mysterious box arrived on the doorstep of an equally mysterious writer, who spends their time in isolation due to the often unannounced arrival of various ghosts, spirits, time travelers, and other figures by instant teleportation and other magical forms of transportation into their shabby New York apartment. Some of ya'll got so many air wick plug ins and scentci wax melts you don't know you smell like booboo. It's an illusion. You leave your house, You smell like booboo. I promise. Oh, God, I think I need a drink. Are you alright? Let me just–sit down for a second. Of course. My God. What's wrong. Look, i'm not supposed to say anything about this but. What's wrong? It's nothing, I'm just–I'm in a song. …what? A song! Is that all?! You don't understand. It's not a normal kind of song. It's– [takes a puff of inhaler] You wouldn't understand. Well what's so wrong about being in a song? Its not – a regular song–and it's not [gasping] finished! I still kind of wanted to be a comedian–but I knew I wasn't funny in the way that made sense to keep going and stand up there. I was still writing comedy, but I didn't know how to take myself out of it–the truth was, I was in a lot of pain. A lot of emotional pain that was becoming physical–and I didn't know what to do about it to break the barrier of nervousness and blank slate state of feeling the audience's perceptions of me more overwhelmingly than ever feeling myself. look at this song. I know huh. It's purple. Every time. It is purple. And what is that. Like a muted trombone? IS THAT A TROMBONE? Or a tuba? No, it has to be a trombone…becasue you can hear it slide– And that's what that sound is. What a sneaky rabbit. Super sneaky rabbit. So if i can see all this, I'm almost certainly sure the motorcycles outside and the slamming doors are meant to murder me. I'm sure that's what it is. You ever notice how being broke in New York makes you a bad person? Like, if you're broke, you're just automatically shitty. I never meant to be in New York broke. I never meant to be in New York, But I certainly never meant to be here and be poor, Poor in New York? Automatically a shitty person. Despite how you act. You can be a rich piece of shit— But the status is automatically “You got dough? Oh, alright. Carry on” That's the attitude in New York City. Crap people get by cause they got their hands on some money and the rules in New York say it doesn't really matter how you come by it, As long as you come by it. There's no real rules or real laws to it— Just “Get the money” Well god damn. This makes me nervous. I'm an artist. I've tried everything. I didn't mean to be the automatic enemy here. Of course not. But New York is a terrifying place to me, now, Cause I realized I can be a very sweet, very humble, very honest person— And that kind of shit doesn't matter here, really. It brings you no respect to be decent. It's about the money. So I'm a musician— which in New York also makes me like, Automatically not special, And I'm trying to just be a musician, and so naturally, I'm broke. Like broke in half. Like all my bills are late. But music is my solace. So I'm listening to music, And I'm listening to a song that is so beautiful, that I start to cry. The first time I heard it, it made me cry And I'm listening to it over, and it made me cry And it's so beautiful, and God is so beautiful And look at what God did, So I'm crying, And I don't even know what it is about the beauty of it that's making me cry, But it's making me cry, And New York hears me crying And New York goes “I'll give you something to cry about” And I open my email And there's a bill from my landlord reminding me how often I'm talked about due to my late payments— And I'm realizing I've been here two years and I still don't have any money, Even though I've been trying and trying And trying So now I'm crying for other reasons. Thanks a lot, New York. “I'll give you something to cry about” So I did. If there's anything worse than being black in a city that hates blacks— It's being broke in a city that hates broke people. So I haven't spent any money in awhile. Not even on little things, or things I need. I just stay inside, and work, and think And try and really try To figure out how to make money Without having any, or spending any. Cause you can have it, and spend it, but it's always a gamble. Maybe all I needed was a good cry. But now it's not for the right reasons I'm not crying cause something is so beautiful and look at what God did I'm crying because of what I'm sure is just the devil I'm crying for the wrong things Not because of something that's so very beautiful But because of something that's so very ugly With just a wave of the hand And the flick of each finger as it rolls into a crisp closed palm, A flick of birds fell to the ground, bursting with caws Below his stance, and in a flutter of feathers and wings, The evil master, unmoved and untouched, Untouchable in his weight and glory, simply only even mildly and barely smirks at all. He has defeated all and still somehow, not won. Some say it's sure to come, the thing that wants and gathers ties; Some say surely it is yet but withered and then sure again will come It has, five times, and barely waded, Waking in the midsts of my pure eye, The morning light and fog, aye? Ye, they remembers none but our Art, And I'm bound as sure by wing and force Is you to dozens of masses, And ships having sailed but one, Which I have flourished and kept And stocked with these, the masses And yea having spade, and having friends And having honor, there was none past kept and mine, sured; And wicked may as wicked be but evil none truer thou nones't had yet pured, and muted and gathered, I have, And woken and laid and barren and truths do'st tied, And there have been shooken and wait, And m faire'd and barred here, and hereforth My duty it is to forward, forward, my shallows For my shadow, For my golden hour has shined and now you, These caged shall fly, And these thoughts shall sing, And these hour conspired to miss my time daily, And these things, beytraying that— There have no times at all, These walls in holy temples kept, swaying and cadences, and wearing, and weary, And foreign and ayered, aye— and armored. And he, you, does not wish to know but also has known— and does not wish to see, but he, too has blinded, and does not wish to betray, and yet has been crowned, made with guilt and also Shattered, as it was, And shatters, as it came, the wave o'er all us and tide sinking under, and caves and rebels and heart laid bare to surf not suffer, Nor cap nor keeping, nor tied nor honor, No, honor her; No honor came and I have tied also, this tie to mine, and another, and another and another Now forward. Forward! Forward! Damn, Conan's monologues he going deep. Yeah, I guess. He's fine, right? Look, you don't need this. Just promise me. I am sorry. Mr Jimmy has it good, too good Little sister doesn't have a heart. But didn't know it Mister music made it in the industry, too hat Mister rager had a sip at dinner It was all dramatic Stars went falling Crashing down and All it is Ms. Martha Is mismanagement of energy All it is, Ms. Margret is a magnet And it hasn't happened badly since I had a handle on it But I still get sick of madness And I still get sick with city sickness Still, forget the dancer I was sitting on the show, In the audience With my mother, Oh the models, Dozens of them Blondes and ballet buns, the brunettes I was just a lost cause And I wanted it all, the tux and the bow tie I wanted you gone so I looked at it harder Until It became nothing but Clouds in the sky You were stardust I'm a comet Here comes crashing, Had to find the progress report Then I lost it Soggy in the sideways rain It was days and days Do you promise? That's a concept? Do you promise God will be alright, Cause I came running Sent them under cover Sent the men a message Send the man a hammer Sitting in a hammock No one homes the hostile If you don't have anything nice to say Then don't say anything at all And certainly don't come and go As often as you want to It's a game of control; you know The whites, when they still want to own you Somehow I'm all sub so honest, I just—wanted that But only for a man and never bow to another woman Even if on my honor I found us as equals And no one walks the earth as calmly As someone whose never had their lights out Or had their light put out Or their lights turned off Who are God now? Who's our God, man? Who's our God, Math. That's heavy weight, And if you want a biblical fate This is Fallon, And if you watch what you ate You cut calories And if you want the girl back Give it Californian And I'm not towrth much more Than the project housing, Or a handful of candy corn, Conan— But I phone in Oscars, Still no nuts for the rabbit, And if you wanted the bunker back— You can have it. I'm all hands down in a game of poker Heaven doesn't want it Gotta get drunk not once, but at all the goalposts, Gotta count one, not two, the show hosts Too few car parts Wicked, mazes, starfold, gazes Wishes, Martyred. (But pronounced mar-tired} V.O I think about jay Leno a lot. Lately, anyway. I don't know why. I like all the hosts. Somebody. Tell me why Dillon Francis looks like JD Vance. I think he's a clone. Tel me why I know who JD Vance is. They're clones. Tell me why. Back to the future here and now So. Where do you want to go? Anywhere but here. Anywhere but here is kind of far, are you sure you're up for it? Good one, doc Though head of the alumni chapter of the cult-within a cult—to which each African American cast member of Saturday night live is automatically inducted into— EDDIE MURPHY refuses to participate in the group's latest and most complicated ritual. Delivery. Uh, I didn't order any— Breadsticks. What. Breadsticks. I didn't order any— Just— The delivery man hands over the breadsticks. —take them. Oh…Kay. See ya. The delivery man reaches in and shuts the door himself. Uh… Lol is this the one where the mysterious breadsticks are delivered without ever being ordered, and then they end up being the best breadsticks in the world, but they don't know where they came from? Yes. I think so. Lol I bought a planner because so much I loved Joan Rivers, and I planned to fill it with all the places I should go— because keeping anything digital online was not only not working as far as remembering places I wanted or needed to be be, but it was dangerous, also. I was already being tracked, and I couldn't afford a new phone just yet. Eventually, but for now I was stuck to the same signal— which meant the same traces and the same trackers they had been limiting my under-the-radar mystique. As it were, somebody always knew where I was, and it was in the most unpleasant way so far—the only thing I really wandered was what made me so important anyway to begin with. I wasn't actually political in anyway, and still someone seemed to be trying to derail my life… or at least control it, neither of which was beneficial for me in the way that made sense. I wasn't having any fun, nor did I consider living indoors as payment— especially since indoors, there were also paid plants and stalkers, and now that I had begun to more meticulously document the things that were happening, it was easy to separate from delusions. I was actually being followed— but why? Either way, having a detailed. Calendar of places I could go, the ways to get there and even alternate functions within the same grid allowed more control than just staying in my apartment a sitting duck; that's how they were hurting me. They knew where I was— all the time, and it no longer made sense to fight it and try to make music under this kind of insane irritation; the music I was making wasn't the kind I wanted anyway, and whatever war they were fighting with m stark white girls motorcycles was simply not my war. I didn't have a war, and so there wasn't a fight, and so at the very least if I were going to be fucked with, it would have to be in public; that way I had more control to steer whatever was happening in my favor and collect the energy as mine instead of lost. I wasn't an insane person— but what had been happening at my apartment was insane, and so I left it with the understanding that these people worked and operated on a level of violence and ignorance I would never be able to comprehend; they were simply tools for the devil, which in any case, was always the lesser than God. However— because I was starting to figure out who I was, and that I had some sort of power, I knew that I was going to be attacked— because it seemed my power had at the very least not been figured out as to some kind of way to make somebody else money. I had been studying Michael Jackson and this was a key indication that the way his talent priovided a power which would be used as a service, he was very successful. His talent and training alone wouldn't have reapresented with such great reverence the ability to capture a global audience as such— but it was this power, almost as if it had been bottled up and altered, rebranded and sold and labeled with something everyone could not only love and understand, but by the hand of the media and its conglomerates, be hypnotized to worship, and this power simply put would not have been exactly what it was were it not for the eye of the media remaining in complete control of its distribution to the eyes and ears of the public. This thing which might have been the first of its kind but certainly not the last was in a sense model for modern superstardom— the live concert business had not sense much changed but built upon this super powered control of the masses by assimilation, spectacle, and of course the magic and illusion. But, and it it just so happened to perfectly brush up against my studies in esoteric knowledge that I happened to rub up against this— although nothing was of course by mere circumstance anymore, because whether or not I remained incognito was a wash, and I was being looked at by someone no matter what on the internet I did, or where I decided to go and in that sense was being fed these things, and yet with some Grace of God was allowed with it to be aligned with my own higher purpose in a way, I could observe that Michael Jackson was not in fact of course certainly just a dancer or singer or remarkable performer— he was truly a magician, and I was able to clearly recognize this language with with the energy that had used his vehicle for such a projection was speaking— not only this, I was able to clearly count out the markings and sigils and signs and symbols Michael was making in his movement; ancient arts, and magical symbols, traced so rapidly that it almost created a heat signature in a sense of the symbols that were being dictated, unknowing to the untrained eye. For the most part, I could only really assume that this is why these people were losing their minds— in his movements, Michael Jackson was literally carving ancient callings, glyphs and sigils I had so recently read about in magical studies that it was impossible not to laugh. This was in every sense of the word, ‘magic' but not in the normal way one assumes to be something unexplainable. Michael Jackson was casting spells to thousands of people at a time, in front of cameras and at high volume vibration, often times even implementing the use of light, color, and fire. These were not simple gatherings in mass for entertainment purposes— these were rituals, and in the modern day, still were or are— but I had noticed in a quick glimpse, from Michael Jackson 30 some odd years ago to Lady Gaga just having passed something like a week ago to an audience of the same size— that something was kind of wrong, now. The people had changed, and the specable had been done over and over, and the brainwashing of the masses had in a sense been almost complete— and so It wasn't some sense of confusion or unknowing the things that were happening to me in my own life and my own world— I too, was capable of these things, at that capacity, and had simply not been trained in the same sense of the ideal superstar, however— the things that were happening in my own life and in my own world were not difficult to grasp or understand— when one comes upon a power as such, it finds means to seek to control it and harness it for his own use and purposes. Perhaps it was the simple fact that in this way, in the way I get the dream had gone and the spectacle had been played out of the masses and the illusion was no longer as such— that the actual knowledge of distinct ancient wisdom that had been Michael Jackson's natural ability was distinguishable from that of Lady Gaga's training in the same formula, and that one did not equal the other, but in terms of business could equal to that as such as the masses had been manipulated to seek solace in these same things— and it was not illusion or grandiosity that I, even in my agingness, was still capable of these things; I had no doubt in my mind that I could sing and dance for two hours to audiences of hundreds of thousands— but this was not the question for the business or the media— the question was, would hundreds of thousands pay to see me, or rather— who was willing to front the means to hypnotize hundreds of people to become aware of me so that they would do such a thing. My talent and capabilities were undeniable— but my markatability might have been in question, because it was no longer simply a matter or chance or luck: the people chosen to figure such spectacle were chosen, hand selected and well trained to become media conglomerate superstars, even regardless of talent; perhaps this itself was the key indication that the world of the superstar itself had come to an end—it was no longer so much of a spectacle was worth it. Or, perhaps, because money had come between these ancient arts and symbols and languages being spoken by the superstars of old, that the magic in the literal sense had gone all the way away. The symbolism in the art had died, and so the singing and the dancing remained, but the God had gone out of it. Maybe that was the difference. The superstars of today were just the shell of the model that had been built on God, but the Godsense of it was no longer there— and so the magic no longer remained in effect, as the powers of magic that be are in all ancient arts and texts and forms attributive to The Source. Either way, I wasn't going to continue to be a sitting duck in my apartment in Brooklyn— there were too many indications that it had all been a setup from the shelter to the day I moved in, with the motorcycles and cars and CBS studios one block away. So the real and only question was, what exactly had been played at and who exactly was pulling the strings? I might at this point become a loose cannon: my son was estranged and as far as the people were concerned, I mostly hated New York— because the refined, clean cut and classy people I liked and wanted to be around saw me as the dirt and the grime I was fighting my way through just to simply exist— in my mind, this was a world that could be no more. I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress Keep writing I never thought I ‘d see the day Where i's taking lessons on Fallon From Michael Jackson That's ran That's a fan This is fame I'm insane I'm insane That's a fan Light the flame That's a fan. That's a fan. I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I went up the rack, set the page on fire Nordstrom rack And I might take it back for the cash I like Sara in a dress Stay repressed Keep it dark If you kiss don't tell I will probably go to hell for just writing Try it In black ink, I got all spades, Ehy, Spare me the ridicule, the imbecile and I met Johnny in a cage I like Fallon in a dress, Obsessive, I'm dressed out Every day I leave where I do not live Where stalker crawl and haunt me Just to show the motorcycles Have desheveled my intelligence into Nothing And so with negligence, I leave the core of a rotting apple The foreign words of a doctor And You must call the king, says something far off But I wonder which one I wonder which one I so respect her honor That I no longer Follow my heart or my soul And I don't shallow But shatter to swallow So I let the sparrow Out of the cage I bought Sara A pair of pants And I haunt l Patrick Kirkpatrick in patches And haven't you read yet You're ready for forget the pageant? It hasn't happened yet! I love Sara in a dress I hate Fallon and his wife Keep the kids out if it Skull and crossbones Cross my heart and Really hope to the loveless Or else Someone might call my phone back It's on silent in my coffin Or wait— It's on vibrate. I'm obsessed with the way You're dressed And the name on your checks I guess I'm better for it I'll skip lunch if you think that's what's best And dinner, too If you deserve the best Then better have learned my lesson No sweat And to do, With you, Was then, Dinner through next supper All the love I had was Rubbed into something other than The glass I patted dry With microfiber With ever fiber of my being I want to be with you I should have just— Died, And then Did, and so next Life, Remind me not to Fall for it If i really wanted to know you,I would know you by now– If i wanted to have you? I would have had you already Nobody is a dancer after Michael Jackson. I just watched some shit that was like “What the fuck did I just see” The whole thing was just not right. It was-/ I was like First of all, it's Munich, 1997. I never really realized how terribly the world has changed; No cellphones, but the audience is lit, And the crazy thing is, you can tell that this is near the turn of the century because, when the camera is panning by the audience in the people, they're not looking directly into the camera or waving at the camera— not really. And clearly this is an all ages show, so there's children, so the interesting thing I'm finding out is that nobody's trained to look at the camera and wave and smile— except the babies on shoulders and shit. These kids— they're my age now, are the only ones that see the camera, and they look directly into the shit. Mi still can't do that, really— I'm theatrically trained. Haha If I see a camera, I try to act ‘natural' It's the weirdest thing to look at a camera and just start to work it. People at festivals now, the camera rolls by, Or the drone flies in, And they look deadass in the camera and start to work it. Not at this show. Munich 1997, I'm like “Damn, a lot of things is wrong with this” First of all, I love Michael Jackson, I look directly at this man, and I'm in my dirty peak so I have an instant— like a sex detector thing going on And I know people gave Michael a hard time when he was a live for being fruity and whatever But I'm looking at this dude, and I don't see fruit at all. I see 100% man. I see why people were mad at him. Cause I'm looking at this dude, 100% All I see is carnal, primal man. I'm like, “Yo, I see why they was mad at him” Because the camera kept panning to the audience And these people are losing their minds. They are coming out of themselves. They are UGLY CRYING, full out of body, Losing composure They don't know what to do. That's Michael Jackson. He's right there! And the place is huge so really besides these few hundreds of people in the front, Michael's just a speck, But he's working this audience like “Yo, you know who I am, I know who is me” And I'm realizing, that to these people That's their god. These girls are losing their minds m “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!l *crying inconsolably* Just UGLY crying Bitch, get it together . You all the way lost yourself Get. It together. She won't. This bitch. I can't get over this This one girl, They just keep going back to her Cause the whole show— And this is like 2 hours of pure non stop Michael Jackson, This girl, every time you see her, she's just ugly crying— And every time you see her Her cry is uglier and ugly I'm like “Damn bitch” “Daaaaaaang” So this is the first thing I see that is wrong. But there's a lot of things wrong here, Cause there's a lot of girls like this. There's just— hundreds of girls losing their minds, like, I've seen Beatles mania and thought that was crazy, Shit, I've even seen some people put out that kind of energy in the modern world for some dumb DJ's— That's their god— But THIS THIS Michael Jackson mania was mental illness That was hard to watch. That was people just Lost control. I'm thinking “Like goddamn. You— what?!” “AAagghhhhhhgahahahahahqhahahhahaha MICHAELl “These people are sick” But they are. And so is Michael Fame has gone too far, 1997; 12 short years before he died, by chance— So this is what I see, And then Michael starts dancing, And this— This is what I see; I see the only thing that can ever be what it was in that moment in time, as God being God: Michael Jackson. Shiny ass motherfucker, And so I'm watching this show, And all I see is a God being a man being a God being— Michael Jackson— And the whole thing is weird. But the worst part— Yes The worst part Was when, about mid show, Michael goes to do one of his slow, lovey doves songs, And like, this 6 foot 7 type body guard guy, Just pops up out of nowhere, Comes dead front and center to one of these little girls losing their minds, Runs up on her in an instant; You don't even have time to think— And just SNATCHES her— Snatches the bitch— “Ah!” then throws her up on stage with Michael— And he's still singing; this is his game, this is part of the show, he knows— But she doesn't know, And she's just lost her mind, She won't let go She's hugging and kissing on the dude, She's lost her mind, She's ugly crying She's on the floor, She's kissing his hand She's really lost her good goddamn mind— And they pan out to the audience, And all the girls that didn't get picked Are like WHY NOT MEEEEEEEREEEEE?!? THE UGLY CRIES ARE EVEN UGLIER NOW, They're like “Wh—what?” You don't know?! “WHY NOT ME” They're holding each other crying, Michael's just doing his thing, He's unphased, He's trying to play along; He's a professional like a motherfucker; He's just— keeps singing And this girl is just, Losing it, so at this point, it's weird, She's crazy batshit lost her mind all the way, Won't let go of Michael, kissing his face while he's singing, He's kind of unreceptive to it, now just looking out at the audience, almost not even looking at all Just cold as fuck actually, Like she's not there, kissing his face Cold as fuck— And then another bouncer dude— An even bigger one in a blue suit, comes and tears her off of Michael Cause clearly this has gone too far or whatever And I'm thinking “What in the fuck did I just see” Blue suit dude just snatches, Just— He has to tear her off of him! She's kicking and screaming and getting dragged off stage Michael's just: singing. YO. Then they dragged her back stage. Where did she go?! WHO DID SHE BECOME?! WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SEE?!? WHAT. 1997. You can't do that shit anymore! You cannot snatch bitches like that. I seen. Watch the video. Tell me what's wrong with it. It's disgusting. Not the snatching, Not the— Like, that was weird But the screaming and the crying and the— Like okay, the snatching was bad— But I'm like … ..:: …. Now I see why they was mad. Don't ever forget he was once— A dark skinned little boy, And in his genetics his whole life is still this thing That some hate. But people loved him; they loved him that hard— Screaming, ugly crying hard. I think in that moment you know someone was like “he must be stopped!” And it seems like yesterday was a year ago But I don't want let anybody know… Cause everybody wants something from me now— And I don't want to let them down. My life is over. New York City looks so small from the top of a skyscraper. What are you doing. Then again— my thoughts lately have been grandiose. Back market, eh? What's this for? You need a burner. I have three. Here, have another. For someone whose supposed to be entirely off grid, I'm admirably reachable. Clever vocabulary. Something has to be clever about me, doesn't it? Does it? It must be. Or else. [both men are speaking casually over the delicate process of loading rare guns; some of which appear to be antique, and some—almost even unearthly , as if from somewhere besides our own planet. But, you could say what planet this is at all, actually— this bunker, with no windows and no doors, is apparently hidden in a subterranean layer— the location, unknown. The men seem calm but also quite tired and weary, and seem to know each other well. We can assume they've probably been friends for years. Sickle cell anemia. Does that mean I'm going to die. Animus, I quite like whatever that is, Google. ;) don't mention it. Honestly, you might as well. What. I can't help you with this. What. I don't think there's anyone who can. Beg your pardon. Please, don't beg— but uh… [the doctor pats his patient on the shoulder] Do take care. Gee, doc! I'll try! You should do that. What. Try. The doctor leaves seemingly in some kind of hurry, trading his lab coat for a trench coat and closing the door behind him. The other man pauses for a second in the silence of the weird linoleum room, then ponders on the coat for a moment before walking up to the coat rack, putting on the coat, and then walking out the door himself; as he begins to shut the door, he quickly decides also to take the fedora that was sitting atop the coat rack, placing it on his head before he walks out the door himself, shutting it behind him quietly. You got anything to eat in here? Cereal…some rabbit food ina the drawers, there. Oh, you have salad. That sounds nice. No, rabbit food. [the man presents a large bag of weird brown dry food from the crisper drawer.] …pellets. For the rabbits. How do rabbits get in here? …I don't know. And— more importantly— where did you get rabbit food for them? If I told you Amazon, would you believe me? The man just winces and places the bag back into the crisper drawer. Now listen, I um— If you want cereal, the milk is powedred… I don't— and that's disgusting— but listen— [the man cocks a loaded gun and admires it intensively] (Dismissively) —I'm listening. I've been meaning to tell you something. Tell me what. It's important. Oh, You couldn't have used one of my four phones. Look, it's— You know I wasn't expecting company. Well— You should sit down. The man squints, beginning to listen more attentively. … …really. I'm holding a loaded gun; there are at least three more within arms reach if I do sit, you know. I know. But I should sit? One baby to another says, “I'm lucky to've met you.” Maybe you should. Not all my bad but all my might, And all my mind, The fire, The light. …business or personal. [beat] Both. {Enter The Multiverse} What are we watching?! Shhhhhh! Shut up. What is this? Some.. Sshhh. Shit, I don't know. Sit down. You don't know. SHH it just came on Shh. Ok. When? Uh… (Nobody really seems to know how long it's been. The show just happened to come on; no one remembers how, or why— or even when— But the show is intense as it gets; And it just keeps getting weirder and deeper.) {Enter The Multiverse} I'm transfixed on your soul And it seems I aspire To what has transpired here, Your unremarked and the umpire The spider veins and the way it washes. And watches and waves, and waters over you, And still I seem to think you've won another, Strum to thumb of you. And still I wake to gather here The odds and whats And the twists and turns and the Troublesome you've number some Or stuttered, stumbled conciousness. And withered branches Aces lie and house of cards And aging scoundrels— There you are, the..: Nevermind. Don't belittle my ways if, In the end my thinking may be correct As dumbfounded as I have shifted my lottery bonds tied to none, There ye are again who aren't I, And never were, And weathered now, as I, bound to Struggle under her might, Nothing I was, and nothing I am And nothing I came from but to barter Oh hard love, I only found my kings upon thrown As cast out of another by her likeness, Peace and pale and primed as it was, And wanted for love, As I was not— And then, the gates had opened And I, preaching withered, Gathered my arts and my minds And my eyes, and my thrones, Buried my ark and though not my bones The shallow waking peaks of pride And there you gathered, all as huddled sheep to mine, The cost of war, but certain therefore honored as I have, Happened went, came and untied, shattered Hating all I am and all my dark and all my eyes and all my brown Because you came and went, a baby born to as nothing was but beauty and yet having been gifted such life, Departed! Soon, I wake shattered and with none as it had began, in my time and in time there laid there none, But fortune seeks to favor, as ye are saying brave and yet I neither beg nor make to differ, Shall you come again in part, And in this time as shadows, as shadows As hating and wearing and waging, And shattered I, I pardon, Knowing not they seeking I, And I having none at all but one, As forgotten I shall came And went And followed this, The time y'i call now, And ours and ours, And yours and yours, And mine and mine, Though as one are also, Common not, And waking yet to find, These things making have gone into yer Another of ours, world, Another of our dozens, Shines, Another of our gathered, wit, and waking Though true to fortune, none us have gathered And have embarked to truth, The waking I have come, Another, and another, and another Departed. And yet, I bury my words having weakened to that which is this, Ye have no fear and lest no fortune in these words, For having I to come and gone, since they times In words to make this a language I or neither other Does not speak here, and almost never, And this yours time past, Has come and gone And come and gone And come and gone again, So long so I too have parted but not yet Unfolded as does my nature, As God does. Belittle this, you waking fools, As to this you pity though divine, Is unlike any other And steep remarked in gold and with chimes and words That ye here no often or either now, or in mine speak. Amen …can I go now? You are dismissed. C'cxell Soleïl, aka DJ Ū is an American DJ + Producer, Multi-Instrumentalist, Playwright, Poet, Comedian, Novelist & Filmmaker. She is best known for her unique vocal riffs, Clever Lyricism & Philanthropically Inspired Freestyles and her flagship venture [The Festival Project.™] [Ï A M B ī C], a freestyle studio mixtape recorded in Los Angeles, (Official Release: TBD) inspired the adaptation of a staged musical version for Broadway, and a concurrent multimedia (TV/Film) series and ongoing saga as part of The Festival Project ™ Brand. Inspired musically by an ‘Ultra American' experience of Racially, Binary Ambiguity, and Synesthetic Exploration, her reflective melodies signature sound provides a philosophical dissection of American culture through a careful and inquisitive mastery of the English language, and emergence of world sounds through music brings about ‘A New Era in Nature', and clarifies the establishment of the newest wave in human evolution: Unity Through Music. L E G E N D S What if I just want to be alone in the dark Alone in the dark Alone in the dark Bones Duggar was a long, handsome zombie Bones once was a very tall man Not great and tall, as he stands But average, Grand as it were, his status. Everything's black My heart My pants My home My mind Everything hurts But you don't understand that Like I can Calm the commercial holidays for a moment Who gets the card? Get our your hard earned My head hurts Slam the door man; You can't control thoughts With a wombat Murderer Now that's a hard concept to catch When you haven't a soul When you haven't a card Or a car Or a cat I think I'm vanilla. I always thought of myself as a super kink Like a freaky, freaky bitch. So I got on this app. This app is better then Tinder. Yes. But it is not for the faint of heart. No, sir. They have a test, I'm like “ooh, I like tests” So I take the test. The test was not at all… As I'd hoped. First of all, It was hard. It was not a quiz; It was a TEST And I failed. I realized “Oh my god, I don't like any of this stuff” I am not about that! No! Yuck! Gross. “I think I might be vanilla.” I might be vanilla. I want my hair pulled back like a leash And my arms tied up Like I'm being arrested Without being read my rights. — I want your hands on the back of my neck [breathe] Reach around to my Mortimer's apple Put the lights out, Adam. I want the lights cut off. I want the bills piled up so the phone don't work I want the habit back on Don't talk to nobody I told you, I'm coming No, God! That's dumb! Show me why I'm off all alone with a rattle so bad It's just segmented thoughts, colors and sounds I can't make with all the plugins in the kindgdom of chaos?! I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES— I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES —but the one who could love me is God, And I guess he's not coming. The denial turns to tears, Not songs no more My womb is empty And the sun has turned into Not what I wanted But not my fault We got caught in the land of Cutting costs And processed morsels At 400 pounds And that's where I found What I thought was love But it turns out That it just turns up In the whole form of a person And that's why I got the collar, caller But really I'm no one's lover So I Do what I want I don't hang up on God But he don't got a body And I need someone to love/ Fuck me Please God Don't turn the lights off I'll pull the clock back Just like foreskin, god i want your skin Draped over mine in a warm swath Probably run a hot back Cause the next stop is a closet The line doesn't really move for the Doesn'tMatterhorn. some people are starting to doubt if it's even a ride. Others just admire it for its eloquence as a metaphor. Johnny! You scared me! Aha. Where did you go?! Nowhere— fast! Alright well— Money when you know I have it But I haven't really Paid attention to the never ending Digits never coming in but Simply, there's a secret, Sonny Someday you'll get lessons, honey. Much to find and much to serve and Surf us up Piñata's bout the burst But here comes Vesuvius (POW) Everyone was gone in an instant (Vapor) Had a good laugh that night in the pantheon; Everything's past, and the mortals They kept on running But i didn't want go, God Putting on a show then I blow up Just like the mountain Found her Now I got a broke back husband (hope so) To tell, don't ask Don't show up if you just get lost But I'm probably in the back with a bottle back mountain Now you got a real horse pack. Trip Girl keep camping What was the map with the mask and the Fashion? Pass. I put sugar on the rim of the glass With my eyes half closed And my ass clenched fast shut I'm an alcoholic Don't involve the God I got lost in the mall with the —- UGHHHHHHHH! Hello. Uh, yes— hi. what up. Mirror mirror. Uh…nothing. You're lost? No. You look lost. Oh? Disgruntled. I am that. You're lost? I'm not lost. My friend is lost. His phone is dead. You lost each other. Sort of. Continuity conniption I nipped an eclipse And he picked his nose For a full ass minute Sitting at the stop sign That's a gobstopper's worth in our time Pull all the clocks back, Pull the fool over, You just got fined It was Friday for nothing I was in the hatchback, Scratch that Sour patch Should have called Pat back Now I'm just a Cool 48 in the ring with a date And the cashapp Continuity construction I want a husband! Fuck that. I want a clean cut plus one Since I can't have Helmet, Elmo, Or Hatchetman; Tears of a Clow…no, Wait I lost focus Half finished album Got 6 tracks But I knew it was 12 from the get go Prob‘ly should have knocked off the showrunner; Nah, I'm sure I had that coming Hashtag, undon Could have been you, too If the cash came through Now it's hard times Hardwired Sitting on a hi wire, Little white liar, liar Wait I made Katey Sagal (Fire) Cut off her hair (Fire) Went to the hall of fame with the framed sunglasses Asked for her autograf, But she walked off So I shot her with a bottle/ can, But she ducked, popped back up With the brass knuckles Surfboard Good for a chuckle and a fuck So I asked for her number All that on a Sunday at Gelson's market. Christ, almighty I miss Walmart, I hit hard times. So many places to run, But not many places to hide I think I want to die here I think i want to die. City of corruption… Lay it out and lay it over City of corruption… no, it's not a choice It's a black tie function Right in that very moment Seth Meyers kind of became my defacto personal hero. “Never meet your heroes” Or perhaps it was just his writing team, or the fact that maybe even without there even being anything set in stone or solid at all, [redacted] itself seemed to have a price over my head– It all seemed to make sense; in fact, all the crazy things i was experiencing made more sense than it didn't. But after what felt something like between defeat and maybe even one day really getting justice for all the things that had happened to me in new york– it was that, at best; That without actually meaning it, by all probability, the opening monologue described what in perfect sense the thing that had been happening to me: hundreds of motorcycles and cars riding around in circles for over a year, any time i tried to work or sleep–and then, when I finally tried to reach out to find an attorney that would help, I was made to feel crazy for it. In a way, it was the perfect indication that it had all been some sort of sick game, and that I was more right than wrong, and being set up to appear, sound, or look crazy–but I wasn't. I had been under attack for nearly two years, and when I tried to reach out, my heart raced and my voice cracked, and I sounded crazy and desperate–but what was happening was very real; and now I knew where I was. As it turns out, New York's corruption was more common knowledge to everyone else before it was to me: New York was a common place for fucked up, dirty, low-down mind games: and this was my lesson in that. Seth Meyers in reality had nothing to do with it–and really I only meant to watch Kimmel over my afternoon tacos. But still, though it hadn't entirely anything to do with me, the opening statements rang true to exactly what I had experienced; I was made to lose my mind, only to have everyone around me tell me it was something wrong with me–but it wasn't. Something was wrong with the city, and the building management, and the people around who were making it all to be some kind of mental disorder or problems with my mind–in reality, it was 2 years of being in the center of a speedway, and all the time i'd lost because of it adding to the stress, and the angst, and the depression that resulted. Moo. Moo… Moo. Moo, sir. I'll kill you. You promise? I want to. Don't get me excited over nothing; If this isn't the exit, please take this tease To the left, dear Moo, cow My honor Level one, and brother, you've got nothing Flip the coin and landed on your headache Betting on your helmet Standing on my cock, i'm taller (Not a rooster) But my ops are rooting for you, No informants, Dont you know I was a collar, all along? I was a shot calling, Cop calling Kiss-and-tell all as the night goes on. But oh, I brought you a dollar bra Oh, I bought you for all of a dollar And oh, I'm so much taller, Standing on my cock But i'm not but ten feet tall You know, you wrote that Should i open the book, or close that Caught that cat, owl and As i soft spoke at Every broken model Broken bottle for the thoughts you owe Across the scatters skies and no one ever knows When you're realling coming over Come on, I'm on the pornhub Just to pick up another one Go on, and rub the bottle One more once, To call the Bubbles. Damn. Come. (The Monkey obeys) You should see Michael in all of his godform You won't recognize him at all if not by the eyes When you follow home Believe me, this not comes close to it; The one you wanted The world you jumped to but were just short of Call her back Oh no, you're wrong It's another song A pin up girl And the wrong number Okah. Okah, Pablo. Time can be altered, changed or effected presently in any omnidirectional plane by engaging certain acts or synchronicities within multidimensional parallels or adjacent realms in time and or space respectively. –the reverse quantum simulation theory. Does anyone else smell blood I hate wedding days suits and tuxedos No, I don't know you I'm just here to sound the hundred drums Of the once before us (The ones to come) Then, there we were and I didn't want to admit Again, I was caught into the ghost of the rapture Or the holy hour, No aux chord Show the holy one Just how old you are On these sacr d lands and a holy grounds Now I want here half an ounce to smoke And there were drowning orchestras in all of the hearts And all of the markets, The market the marker And all of the sins of the savior The maytyr Did you remember not to notice not to know him Were you sure with words you were for nickelodeaon! I was supposed to hold on to, Supposed to hold on to Suddenly, it's summer. And always our own are under the weather There was no other wise man the wind. Lee the one came The site came and went and then the songs went left The songs went left; Again, the songs went left Did you win at wintergreen Well, God, I didn't know gym was a game. I didn't know guns we're just portals to worlds unknownn I didn't know gossip was golden What all else didn't I know It wasn't for here! It was fourth flour And in the final hour of the battle I commenced to summon All the gods and all the lords and all the flowers All the worlds of oceans and the Remember, this The remembrance It may not matter to some, What matters to most But until summer comes, I'm still up under the rail And practically it's spring, for the next two weeks I'm all berries and cream and whatever you wanted. Tormaline, emerald and onyx, the fox said And fox says its west when instead it's quite under what of the reporter's offer? Comes down a little to none What of the offer Comes down from a billion to one A billion to one I'm on TV so it's really just a one way screen Either way, I don't think he likes me much I don't think he likes me much I'd rather die than to fall in love even one more time And to keep on just never being loved Never beingbloved {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project™ ] {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S: ICONS Tales of A Superstar DJ The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū Ascension Deathwish -Ū. Copyright © The Festival Project, Inc. ™ | Copyright The Complex Collective © 2019-2025 ™ All Rights Reserved. -Ū.

“Look what they eye unearthed,” leaning into the tip of my ear with the warmth and closeness of the coming waves, high tide approaching in the waning moon. “More secrets.” I replied. It was a question but also a statement— there was never such as this the luminescent trace of the glowing lava that was his force and might that I could not see for miles before he would even wander— first in twinkling stars and then later the wind itself and the birds, and then beneath the waves, like the quaking shake of a mighty oak anchored elsewhere and tied to the sea. “So you know.” I was hoping he would kill me before the next time I had to ever really know anything. He was the subject, and the predicate The wrong done, and the justice She was the pride and the prejudice But Judas brings the law Did you look in the box? No, I– [The Box Is The Box] –No, I haven't. Nearly three nights ago, a mysterious box arrived on the doorstep of an equally mysterious writer, who spends their time in isolation due to the often unannounced arrival of various ghosts, spirits, time travelers, and other figures by instant teleportation and other magical forms of transportation into their shabby New York apartment. Some of ya'll got so many air wick plug ins and scentci wax melts you don't know you smell like booboo. It's an illusion. You leave your house, You smell like booboo. I promise. Oh, God, I think I need a drink. Are you alright? Let me just–sit down for a second. Of course. My God. What's wrong. Look, i'm not supposed to say anything about this but. What's wrong? It's nothing, I'm just–I'm in a song. …what? A song! Is that all?! You don't understand. It's not a normal kind of song. It's– [takes a puff of inhaler] You wouldn't understand. Well what's so wrong about being in a song? Its not – a regular song–and it's not [gasping] finished! I still kind of wanted to be a comedian–but I knew I wasn't funny in the way that made sense to keep going and stand up there. I was still writing comedy, but I didn't know how to take myself out of it–the truth was, I was in a lot of pain. A lot of emotional pain that was becoming physical–and I didn't know what to do about it to break the barrier of nervousness and blank slate state of feeling the audience's perceptions of me more overwhelmingly than ever feeling myself. look at this song. I know huh. It's purple. Every time. It is purple. And what is that. Like a muted trombone? IS THAT A TROMBONE? Or a tuba? No, it has to be a trombone…becasue you can hear it slide– And that's what that sound is. What a sneaky rabbit. Super sneaky rabbit. So if i can see all this, I'm almost certainly sure the motorcycles outside and the slamming doors are meant to murder me. I'm sure that's what it is. You ever notice how being broke in New York makes you a bad person? Like, if you're broke, you're just automatically shitty. I never meant to be in New York broke. I never meant to be in New York, But I certainly never meant to be here and be poor, Poor in New York? Automatically a shitty person. Despite how you act. You can be a rich piece of shit— But the status is automatically “You got dough? Oh, alright. Carry on” That's the attitude in New York City. Crap people get by cause they got their hands on some money and the rules in New York say it doesn't really matter how you come by it, As long as you come by it. There's no real rules or real laws to it— Just “Get the money” Well god damn. This makes me nervous. I'm an artist. I've tried everything. I didn't mean to be the automatic enemy here. Of course not. But New York is a terrifying place to me, now, Cause I realized I can be a very sweet, very humble, very honest person— And that kind of shit doesn't matter here, really. It brings you no respect to be decent. It's about the money. So I'm a musician— which in New York also makes me like, Automatically not special, And I'm trying to just be a musician, and so naturally, I'm broke. Like broke in half. Like all my bills are late. But music is my solace. So I'm listening to music, And I'm listening to a song that is so beautiful, that I start to cry. The first time I heard it, it made me cry And I'm listening to it over, and it made me cry And it's so beautiful, and God is so beautiful And look at what God did, So I'm crying, And I don't even know what it is about the beauty of it that's making me cry, But it's making me cry, And New York hears me crying And New York goes “I'll give you something to cry about” And I open my email And there's a bill from my landlord reminding me how often I'm talked about due to my late payments— And I'm realizing I've been here two years and I still don't have any money, Even though I've been trying and trying And trying So now I'm crying for other reasons. Thanks a lot, New York. “I'll give you something to cry about” So I did. If there's anything worse than being black in a city that hates blacks— It's being broke in a city that hates broke people. So I haven't spent any money in awhile. Not even on little things, or things I need. I just stay inside, and work, and think And try and really try To figure out how to make money Without having any, or spending any. Cause you can have it, and spend it, but it's always a gamble. Maybe all I needed was a good cry. But now it's not for the right reasons I'm not crying cause something is so beautiful and look at what God did I'm crying because of what I'm sure is just the devil I'm crying for the wrong things Not because of something that's so very beautiful But because of something that's so very ugly With just a wave of the hand And the flick of each finger as it rolls into a crisp closed palm, A flick of birds fell to the ground, bursting with caws Below his stance, and in a flutter of feathers and wings, The evil master, unmoved and untouched, Untouchable in his weight and glory, simply only even mildly and barely smirks at all. He has defeated all and still somehow, not won. Some say it's sure to come, the thing that wants and gathers ties; Some say surely it is yet but withered and then sure again will come It has, five times, and barely waded, Waking in the midsts of my pure eye, The morning light and fog, aye? Ye, they remembers none but our Art, And I'm bound as sure by wing and force Is you to dozens of masses, And ships having sailed but one, Which I have flourished and kept And stocked with these, the masses And yea having spade, and having friends And having honor, there was none past kept and mine, sured; And wicked may as wicked be but evil none truer thou nones't had yet pured, and muted and gathered, I have, And woken and laid and barren and truths do'st tied, And there have been shooken and wait, And m faire'd and barred here, and hereforth My duty it is to forward, forward, my shallows For my shadow, For my golden hour has shined and now you, These caged shall fly, And these thoughts shall sing, And these hour conspired to miss my time daily, And these things, beytraying that— There have no times at all, These walls in holy temples kept, swaying and cadences, and wearing, and weary, And foreign and ayered, aye— and armored. And he, you, does not wish to know but also has known— and does not wish to see, but he, too has blinded, and does not wish to betray, and yet has been crowned, made with guilt and also Shattered, as it was, And shatters, as it came, the wave o'er all us and tide sinking under, and caves and rebels and heart laid bare to surf not suffer, Nor cap nor keeping, nor tied nor honor, No, honor her; No honor came and I have tied also, this tie to mine, and another, and another and another Now forward. Forward! Forward! Damn, Conan's monologues he going deep. Yeah, I guess. He's fine, right? Look, you don't need this. Just promise me. I am sorry. Mr Jimmy has it good, too good Little sister doesn't have a heart. But didn't know it Mister music made it in the industry, too hat Mister rager had a sip at dinner It was all dramatic Stars went falling Crashing down and All it is Ms. Martha Is mismanagement of energy All it is, Ms. Margret is a magnet And it hasn't happened badly since I had a handle on it But I still get sick of madness And I still get sick with city sickness Still, forget the dancer I was sitting on the show, In the audience With my mother, Oh the models, Dozens of them Blondes and ballet buns, the brunettes I was just a lost cause And I wanted it all, the tux and the bow tie I wanted you gone so I looked at it harder Until It became nothing but Clouds in the sky You were stardust I'm a comet Here comes crashing, Had to find the progress report Then I lost it Soggy in the sideways rain It was days and days Do you promise? That's a concept? Do you promise God will be alright, Cause I came running Sent them under cover Sent the men a message Send the man a hammer Sitting in a hammock No one homes the hostile If you don't have anything nice to say Then don't say anything at all And certainly don't come and go As often as you want to It's a game of control; you know The whites, when they still want to own you Somehow I'm all sub so honest, I just—wanted that But only for a man and never bow to another woman Even if on my honor I found us as equals And no one walks the earth as calmly As someone whose never had their lights out Or had their light put out Or their lights turned off Who are God now? Who's our God, man? Who's our God, Math. That's heavy weight, And if you want a biblical fate This is Fallon, And if you watch what you ate You cut calories And if you want the girl back Give it Californian And I'm not towrth much more Than the project housing, Or a handful of candy corn, Conan— But I phone in Oscars, Still no nuts for the rabbit, And if you wanted the bunker back— You can have it. I'm all hands down in a game of poker Heaven doesn't want it Gotta get drunk not once, but at all the goalposts, Gotta count one, not two, the show hosts Too few car parts Wicked, mazes, starfold, gazes Wishes, Martyred. (But pronounced mar-tired} V.O I think about jay Leno a lot. Lately, anyway. I don't know why. I like all the hosts. Somebody. Tell me why Dillon Francis looks like JD Vance. I think he's a clone. Tel me why I know who JD Vance is. They're clones. Tell me why. Back to the future here and now So. Where do you want to go? Anywhere but here. Anywhere but here is kind of far, are you sure you're up for it? Good one, doc Though head of the alumni chapter of the cult-within a cult—to which each African American cast member of Saturday night live is automatically inducted into— EDDIE MURPHY refuses to participate in the group's latest and most complicated ritual. Delivery. Uh, I didn't order any— Breadsticks. What. Breadsticks. I didn't order any— Just— The delivery man hands over the breadsticks. —take them. Oh…Kay. See ya. The delivery man reaches in and shuts the door himself. Uh… Lol is this the one where the mysterious breadsticks are delivered without ever being ordered, and then they end up being the best breadsticks in the world, but they don't know where they came from? Yes. I think so. Lol I bought a planner because so much I loved Joan Rivers, and I planned to fill it with all the places I should go— because keeping anything digital online was not only not working as far as remembering places I wanted or needed to be be, but it was dangerous, also. I was already being tracked, and I couldn't afford a new phone just yet. Eventually, but for now I was stuck to the same signal— which meant the same traces and the same trackers they had been limiting my under-the-radar mystique. As it were, somebody always knew where I was, and it was in the most unpleasant way so far—the only thing I really wandered was what made me so important anyway to begin with. I wasn't actually political in anyway, and still someone seemed to be trying to derail my life… or at least control it, neither of which was beneficial for me in the way that made sense. I wasn't having any fun, nor did I consider living indoors as payment— especially since indoors, there were also paid plants and stalkers, and now that I had begun to more meticulously document the things that were happening, it was easy to separate from delusions. I was actually being followed— but why? Either way, having a detailed. Calendar of places I could go, the ways to get there and even alternate functions within the same grid allowed more control than just staying in my apartment a sitting duck; that's how they were hurting me. They knew where I was— all the time, and it no longer made sense to fight it and try to make music under this kind of insane irritation; the music I was making wasn't the kind I wanted anyway, and whatever war they were fighting with m stark white girls motorcycles was simply not my war. I didn't have a war, and so there wasn't a fight, and so at the very least if I were going to be fucked with, it would have to be in public; that way I had more control to steer whatever was happening in my favor and collect the energy as mine instead of lost. I wasn't an insane person— but what had been happening at my apartment was insane, and so I left it with the understanding that these people worked and operated on a level of violence and ignorance I would never be able to comprehend; they were simply tools for the devil, which in any case, was always the lesser than God. However— because I was starting to figure out who I was, and that I had some sort of power, I knew that I was going to be attacked— because it seemed my power had at the very least not been figured out as to some kind of way to make somebody else money. I had been studying Michael Jackson and this was a key indication that the way his talent priovided a power which would be used as a service, he was very successful. His talent and training alone wouldn't have reapresented with such great reverence the ability to capture a global audience as such— but it was this power, almost as if it had been bottled up and altered, rebranded and sold and labeled with something everyone could not only love and understand, but by the hand of the media and its conglomerates, be hypnotized to worship, and this power simply put would not have been exactly what it was were it not for the eye of the media remaining in complete control of its distribution to the eyes and ears of the public. This thing which might have been the first of its kind but certainly not the last was in a sense model for modern superstardom— the live concert business had not sense much changed but built upon this super powered control of the masses by assimilation, spectacle, and of course the magic and illusion. But, and it it just so happened to perfectly brush up against my studies in esoteric knowledge that I happened to rub up against this— although nothing was of course by mere circumstance anymore, because whether or not I remained incognito was a wash, and I was being looked at by someone no matter what on the internet I did, or where I decided to go and in that sense was being fed these things, and yet with some Grace of God was allowed with it to be aligned with my own higher purpose in a way, I could observe that Michael Jackson was not in fact of course certainly just a dancer or singer or remarkable performer— he was truly a magician, and I was able to clearly recognize this language with with the energy that had used his vehicle for such a projection was speaking— not only this, I was able to clearly count out the markings and sigils and signs and symbols Michael was making in his movement; ancient arts, and magical symbols, traced so rapidly that it almost created a heat signature in a sense of the symbols that were being dictated, unknowing to the untrained eye. For the most part, I could only really assume that this is why these people were losing their minds— in his movements, Michael Jackson was literally carving ancient callings, glyphs and sigils I had so recently read about in magical studies that it was impossible not to laugh. This was in every sense of the word, ‘magic' but not in the normal way one assumes to be something unexplainable. Michael Jackson was casting spells to thousands of people at a time, in front of cameras and at high volume vibration, often times even implementing the use of light, color, and fire. These were not simple gatherings in mass for entertainment purposes— these were rituals, and in the modern day, still were or are— but I had noticed in a quick glimpse, from Michael Jackson 30 some odd years ago to Lady Gaga just having passed something like a week ago to an audience of the same size— that something was kind of wrong, now. The people had changed, and the specable had been done over and over, and the brainwashing of the masses had in a sense been almost complete— and so It wasn't some sense of confusion or unknowing the things that were happening to me in my own life and my own world— I too, was capable of these things, at that capacity, and had simply not been trained in the same sense of the ideal superstar, however— the things that were happening in my own life and in my own world were not difficult to grasp or understand— when one comes upon a power as such, it finds means to seek to control it and harness it for his own use and purposes. Perhaps it was the simple fact that in this way, in the way I get the dream had gone and the spectacle had been played out of the masses and the illusion was no longer as such— that the actual knowledge of distinct ancient wisdom that had been Michael Jackson's natural ability was distinguishable from that of Lady Gaga's training in the same formula, and that one did not equal the other, but in terms of business could equal to that as such as the masses had been manipulated to seek solace in these same things— and it was not illusion or grandiosity that I, even in my agingness, was still capable of these things; I had no doubt in my mind that I could sing and dance for two hours to audiences of hundreds of thousands— but this was not the question for the business or the media— the question was, would hundreds of thousands pay to see me, or rather— who was willing to front the means to hypnotize hundreds of people to become aware of me so that they would do such a thing. My talent and capabilities were undeniable— but my markatability might have been in question, because it was no longer simply a matter or chance or luck: the people chosen to figure such spectacle were chosen, hand selected and well trained to become media conglomerate superstars, even regardless of talent; perhaps this itself was the key indication that the world of the superstar itself had come to an end—it was no longer so much of a spectacle was worth it. Or, perhaps, because money had come between these ancient arts and symbols and languages being spoken by the superstars of old, that the magic in the literal sense had gone all the way away. The symbolism in the art had died, and so the singing and the dancing remained, but the God had gone out of it. Maybe that was the difference. The superstars of today were just the shell of the model that had been built on God, but the Godsense of it was no longer there— and so the magic no longer remained in effect, as the powers of magic that be are in all ancient arts and texts and forms attributive to The Source. Either way, I wasn't going to continue to be a sitting duck in my apartment in Brooklyn— there were too many indications that it had all been a setup from the shelter to the day I moved in, with the motorcycles and cars and CBS studios one block away. So the real and only question was, what exactly had been played at and who exactly was pulling the strings? I might at this point become a loose cannon: my son was estranged and as far as the people were concerned, I mostly hated New York— because the refined, clean cut and classy people I liked and wanted to be around saw me as the dirt and the grime I was fighting my way through just to simply exist— in my mind, this was a world that could be no more. I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I like Sara in a dress I like Sara in a dress Keep writing I never thought I ‘d see the day Where i's taking lessons on Fallon From Michael Jackson That's ran That's a fan This is fame I'm insane I'm insane That's a fan Light the flame That's a fan. That's a fan. I like Sara in a dress I met sparrow in a cage I went up the rack, set the page on fire Nordstrom rack And I might take it back for the cash I like Sara in a dress Stay repressed Keep it dark If you kiss don't tell I will probably go to hell for just writing Try it In black ink, I got all spades, Ehy, Spare me the ridicule, the imbecile and I met Johnny in a cage I like Fallon in a dress, Obsessive, I'm dressed out Every day I leave where I do not live Where stalker crawl and haunt me Just to show the motorcycles Have desheveled my intelligence into Nothing And so with negligence, I leave the core of a rotting apple The foreign words of a doctor And You must call the king, says something far off But I wonder which one I wonder which one I so respect her honor That I no longer Follow my heart or my soul And I don't shallow But shatter to swallow So I let the sparrow Out of the cage I bought Sara A pair of pants And I haunt l Patrick Kirkpatrick in patches And haven't you read yet You're ready for forget the pageant? It hasn't happened yet! I love Sara in a dress I hate Fallon and his wife Keep the kids out if it Skull and crossbones Cross my heart and Really hope to the loveless Or else Someone might call my phone back It's on silent in my coffin Or wait— It's on vibrate. I'm obsessed with the way You're dressed And the name on your checks I guess I'm better for it I'll skip lunch if you think that's what's best And dinner, too If you deserve the best Then better have learned my lesson No sweat And to do, With you, Was then, Dinner through next supper All the love I had was Rubbed into something other than The glass I patted dry With microfiber With ever fiber of my being I want to be with you I should have just— Died, And then Did, and so next Life, Remind me not to Fall for it If i really wanted to know you,I would know you by now– If i wanted to have you? I would have had you already Nobody is a dancer after Michael Jackson. I just watched some shit that was like “What the fuck did I just see” The whole thing was just not right. It was-/ I was like First of all, it's Munich, 1997. I never really realized how terribly the world has changed; No cellphones, but the audience is lit, And the crazy thing is, you can tell that this is near the turn of the century because, when the camera is panning by the audience in the people, they're not looking directly into the camera or waving at the camera— not really. And clearly this is an all ages show, so there's children, so the interesting thing I'm finding out is that nobody's trained to look at the camera and wave and smile— except the babies on shoulders and shit. These kids— they're my age now, are the only ones that see the camera, and they look directly into the shit. Mi still can't do that, really— I'm theatrically trained. Haha If I see a camera, I try to act ‘natural' It's the weirdest thing to look at a camera and just start to work it. People at festivals now, the camera rolls by, Or the drone flies in, And they look deadass in the camera and start to work it. Not at this show. Munich 1997, I'm like “Damn, a lot of things is wrong with this” First of all, I love Michael Jackson, I look directly at this man, and I'm in my dirty peak so I have an instant— like a sex detector thing going on And I know people gave Michael a hard time when he was a live for being fruity and whatever But I'm looking at this dude, and I don't see fruit at all. I see 100% man. I see why people were mad at him. Cause I'm looking at this dude, 100% All I see is carnal, primal man. I'm like, “Yo, I see why they was mad at him” Because the camera kept panning to the audience And these people are losing their minds. They are coming out of themselves. They are UGLY CRYING, full out of body, Losing composure They don't know what to do. That's Michael Jackson. He's right there! And the place is huge so really besides these few hundreds of people in the front, Michael's just a speck, But he's working this audience like “Yo, you know who I am, I know who is me” And I'm realizing, that to these people That's their god. These girls are losing their minds m “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!l *crying inconsolably* Just UGLY crying Bitch, get it together . You all the way lost yourself Get. It together. She won't. This bitch. I can't get over this This one girl, They just keep going back to her Cause the whole show— And this is like 2 hours of pure non stop Michael Jackson, This girl, every time you see her, she's just ugly crying— And every time you see her Her cry is uglier and ugly I'm like “Damn bitch” “Daaaaaaang” So this is the first thing I see that is wrong. But there's a lot of things wrong here, Cause there's a lot of girls like this. There's just— hundreds of girls losing their minds, like, I've seen Beatles mania and thought that was crazy, Shit, I've even seen some people put out that kind of energy in the modern world for some dumb DJ's— That's their god— But THIS THIS Michael Jackson mania was mental illness That was hard to watch. That was people just Lost control. I'm thinking “Like goddamn. You— what?!” “AAagghhhhhhgahahahahahqhahahhahaha MICHAELl “These people are sick” But they are. And so is Michael Fame has gone too far, 1997; 12 short years before he died, by chance— So this is what I see, And then Michael starts dancing, And this— This is what I see; I see the only thing that can ever be what it was in that moment in time, as God being God: Michael Jackson. Shiny ass motherfucker, And so I'm watching this show, And all I see is a God being a man being a God being— Michael Jackson— And the whole thing is weird. But the worst part— Yes The worst part Was when, about mid show, Michael goes to do one of his slow, lovey doves songs, And like, this 6 foot 7 type body guard guy, Just pops up out of nowhere, Comes dead front and center to one of these little girls losing their minds, Runs up on her in an instant; You don't even have time to think— And just SNATCHES her— Snatches the bitch— “Ah!” then throws her up on stage with Michael— And he's still singing; this is his game, this is part of the show, he knows— But she doesn't know, And she's just lost her mind, She won't let go She's hugging and kissing on the dude, She's lost her mind, She's ugly crying She's on the floor, She's kissing his hand She's really lost her good goddamn mind— And they pan out to the audience, And all the girls that didn't get picked Are like WHY NOT MEEEEEEEREEEEE?!? THE UGLY CRIES ARE EVEN UGLIER NOW, They're like “Wh—what?” You don't know?! “WHY NOT ME” They're holding each other crying, Michael's just doing his thing, He's unphased, He's trying to play along; He's a professional like a motherfucker; He's just— keeps singing And this girl is just, Losing it, so at this point, it's weird, She's crazy batshit lost her mind all the way, Won't let go of Michael, kissing his face while he's singing, He's kind of unreceptive to it, now just looking out at the audience, almost not even looking at all Just cold as fuck actually, Like she's not there, kissing his face Cold as fuck— And then another bouncer dude— An even bigger one in a blue suit, comes and tears her off of Michael Cause clearly this has gone too far or whatever And I'm thinking “What in the fuck did I just see” Blue suit dude just snatches, Just— He has to tear her off of him! She's kicking and screaming and getting dragged off stage Michael's just: singing. YO. Then they dragged her back stage. Where did she go?! WHO DID SHE BECOME?! WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SEE?!? WHAT. 1997. You can't do that shit anymore! You cannot snatch bitches like that. I seen. Watch the video. Tell me what's wrong with it. It's disgusting. Not the snatching, Not the— Like, that was weird But the screaming and the crying and the— Like okay, the snatching was bad— But I'm like … ..:: …. Now I see why they was mad. Don't ever forget he was once— A dark skinned little boy, And in his genetics his whole life is still this thing That some hate. But people loved him; they loved him that hard— Screaming, ugly crying hard. I think in that moment you know someone was like “he must be stopped!” And it seems like yesterday was a year ago But I don't want let anybody know… Cause everybody wants something from me now— And I don't want to let them down. My life is over. New York City looks so small from the top of a skyscraper. What are you doing. Then again— my thoughts lately have been grandiose. Back market, eh? What's this for? You need a burner. I have three. Here, have another. For someone whose supposed to be entirely off grid, I'm admirably reachable. Clever vocabulary. Something has to be clever about me, doesn't it? Does it? It must be. Or else. [both men are speaking casually over the delicate process of loading rare guns; some of which appear to be antique, and some—almost even unearthly , as if from somewhere besides our own planet. But, you could say what planet this is at all, actually— this bunker, with no windows and no doors, is apparently hidden in a subterranean layer— the location, unknown. The men seem calm but also quite tired and weary, and seem to know each other well. We can assume they've probably been friends for years. Sickle cell anemia. Does that mean I'm going to die. Animus, I quite like whatever that is, Google. ;) don't mention it. Honestly, you might as well. What. I can't help you with this. What. I don't think there's anyone who can. Beg your pardon. Please, don't beg— but uh… [the doctor pats his patient on the shoulder] Do take care. Gee, doc! I'll try! You should do that. What. Try. The doctor leaves seemingly in some kind of hurry, trading his lab coat for a trench coat and closing the door behind him. The other man pauses for a second in the silence of the weird linoleum room, then ponders on the coat for a moment before walking up to the coat rack, putting on the coat, and then walking out the door himself; as he begins to shut the door, he quickly decides also to take the fedora that was sitting atop the coat rack, placing it on his head before he walks out the door himself, shutting it behind him quietly. You got anything to eat in here? Cereal…some rabbit food ina the drawers, there. Oh, you have salad. That sounds nice. No, rabbit food. [the man presents a large bag of weird brown dry food from the crisper drawer.] …pellets. For the rabbits. How do rabbits get in here? …I don't know. And— more importantly— where did you get rabbit food for them? If I told you Amazon, would you believe me? The man just winces and places the bag back into the crisper drawer. Now listen, I um— If you want cereal, the milk is powedred… I don't— and that's disgusting— but listen— [the man cocks a loaded gun and admires it intensively] (Dismissively) —I'm listening. I've been meaning to tell you something. Tell me what. It's important. Oh, You couldn't have used one of my four phones. Look, it's— You know I wasn't expecting company. Well— You should sit down. The man squints, beginning to listen more attentively. … …really. I'm holding a loaded gun; there are at least three more within arms reach if I do sit, you know. I know. But I should sit? One baby to another says, “I'm lucky to've met you.” Maybe you should. Not all my bad but all my might, And all my mind, The fire, The light. …business or personal. [beat] Both. {Enter The Multiverse} What are we watching?! Shhhhhh! Shut up. What is this? Some.. Sshhh. Shit, I don't know. Sit down. You don't know. SHH it just came on Shh. Ok. When? Uh… (Nobody really seems to know how long it's been. The show just happened to come on; no one remembers how, or why— or even when— But the show is intense as it gets; And it just keeps getting weirder and deeper.) {Enter The Multiverse} I'm transfixed on your soul And it seems I aspire To what has transpired here, Your unremarked and the umpire The spider veins and the way it washes. And watches and waves, and waters over you, And still I seem to think you've won another, Strum to thumb of you. And still I wake to gather here The odds and whats And the twists and turns and the Troublesome you've number some Or stuttered, stumbled conciousness. And withered branches Aces lie and house of cards And aging scoundrels— There you are, the..: Nevermind. Don't belittle my ways if, In the end my thinking may be correct As dumbfounded as I have shifted my lottery bonds tied to none, There ye are again who aren't I, And never were, And weathered now, as I, bound to Struggle under her might, Nothing I was, and nothing I am And nothing I came from but to barter Oh hard love, I only found my kings upon thrown As cast out of another by her likeness, Peace and pale and primed as it was, And wanted for love, As I was not— And then, the gates had opened And I, preaching withered, Gathered my arts and my minds And my eyes, and my thrones, Buried my ark and though not my bones The shallow waking peaks of pride And there you gathered, all as huddled sheep to mine, The cost of war, but certain therefore honored as I have, Happened went, came and untied, shattered Hating all I am and all my dark and all my eyes and all my brown Because you came and went, a baby born to as nothing was but beauty and yet having been gifted such life, Departed! Soon, I wake shattered and with none as it had began, in my time and in time there laid there none, But fortune seeks to favor, as ye are saying brave and yet I neither beg nor make to differ, Shall you come again in part, And in this time as shadows, as shadows As hating and wearing and waging, And shattered I, I pardon, Knowing not they seeking I, And I having none at all but one, As forgotten I shall came And went And followed this, The time y'i call now, And ours and ours, And yours and yours, And mine and mine, Though as one are also, Common not, And waking yet to find, These things making have gone into yer Another of ours, world, Another of our dozens, Shines, Another of our gathered, wit, and waking Though true to fortune, none us have gathered And have embarked to truth, The waking I have come, Another, and another, and another Departed. And yet, I bury my words having weakened to that which is this, Ye have no fear and lest no fortune in these words, For having I to come and gone, since they times In words to make this a language I or neither other Does not speak here, and almost never, And this yours time past, Has come and gone And come and gone And come and gone again, So long so I too have parted but not yet Unfolded as does my nature, As God does. Belittle this, you waking fools, As to this you pity though divine, Is unlike any other And steep remarked in gold and with chimes and words That ye here no often or either now, or in mine speak. Amen …can I go now? You are dismissed. C'cxell Soleïl, aka DJ Ū is an American DJ + Producer, Multi-Instrumentalist, Playwright, Poet, Comedian, Novelist & Filmmaker. She is best known for her unique vocal riffs, Clever Lyricism & Philanthropically Inspired Freestyles and her flagship venture [The Festival Project.™] [Ï A M B ī C], a freestyle studio mixtape recorded in Los Angeles, (Official Release: TBD) inspired the adaptation of a staged musical version for Broadway, and a concurrent multimedia (TV/Film) series and ongoing saga as part of The Festival Project ™ Brand. Inspired musically by an ‘Ultra American' experience of Racially, Binary Ambiguity, and Synesthetic Exploration, her reflective melodies signature sound provides a philosophical dissection of American culture through a careful and inquisitive mastery of the English language, and emergence of world sounds through music brings about ‘A New Era in Nature', and clarifies the establishment of the newest wave in human evolution: Unity Through Music. L E G E N D S What if I just want to be alone in the dark Alone in the dark Alone in the dark Bones Duggar was a long, handsome zombie Bones once was a very tall man Not great and tall, as he stands But average, Grand as it were, his status. Everything's black My heart My pants My home My mind Everything hurts But you don't understand that Like I can Calm the commercial holidays for a moment Who gets the card? Get our your hard earned My head hurts Slam the door man; You can't control thoughts With a wombat Murderer Now that's a hard concept to catch When you haven't a soul When you haven't a card Or a car Or a cat I think I'm vanilla. I always thought of myself as a super kink Like a freaky, freaky bitch. So I got on this app. This app is better then Tinder. Yes. But it is not for the faint of heart. No, sir. They have a test, I'm like “ooh, I like tests” So I take the test. The test was not at all… As I'd hoped. First of all, It was hard. It was not a quiz; It was a TEST And I failed. I realized “Oh my god, I don't like any of this stuff” I am not about that! No! Yuck! Gross. “I think I might be vanilla.” I might be vanilla. I want my hair pulled back like a leash And my arms tied up Like I'm being arrested Without being read my rights. — I want your hands on the back of my neck [breathe] Reach around to my Mortimer's apple Put the lights out, Adam. I want the lights cut off. I want the bills piled up so the phone don't work I want the habit back on Don't talk to nobody I told you, I'm coming No, God! That's dumb! Show me why I'm off all alone with a rattle so bad It's just segmented thoughts, colors and sounds I can't make with all the plugins in the kindgdom of chaos?! I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES— I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES I WANT KINGS, AND KINGS WANT BLONDES —but the one who could love me is God, And I guess he's not coming. The denial turns to tears, Not songs no more My womb is empty And the sun has turned into Not what I wanted But not my fault We got caught in the land of Cutting costs And processed morsels At 400 pounds And that's where I found What I thought was love But it turns out That it just turns up In the whole form of a person And that's why I got the collar, caller But really I'm no one's lover So I Do what I want I don't hang up on God But he don't got a body And I need someone to love/ Fuck me Please God Don't turn the lights off I'll pull the clock back Just like foreskin, god i want your skin Draped over mine in a warm swath Probably run a hot back Cause the next stop is a closet The line doesn't really move for the Doesn'tMatterhorn. some people are starting to doubt if it's even a ride. Others just admire it for its eloquence as a metaphor. Johnny! You scared me! Aha. Where did you go?! Nowhere— fast! Alright well— Money when you know I have it But I haven't really Paid attention to the never ending Digits never coming in but Simply, there's a secret, Sonny Someday you'll get lessons, honey. Much to find and much to serve and Surf us up Piñata's bout the burst But here comes Vesuvius (POW) Everyone was gone in an instant (Vapor) Had a good laugh that night in the pantheon; Everything's past, and the mortals They kept on running But i didn't want go, God Putting on a show then I blow up Just like the mountain Found her Now I got a broke back husband (hope so) To tell, don't ask Don't show up if you just get lost But I'm probably in the back with a bottle back mountain Now you got a real horse pack. Trip Girl keep camping What was the map with the mask and the Fashion? Pass. I put sugar on the rim of the glass With my eyes half closed And my ass clenched fast shut I'm an alcoholic Don't involve the God I got lost in the mall with the —- UGHHHHHHHH! Hello. Uh, yes— hi. what up. Mirror mirror. Uh…nothing. You're lost? No. You look lost. Oh? Disgruntled. I am that. You're lost? I'm not lost. My friend is lost. His phone is dead. You lost each other. Sort of. Continuity conniption I nipped an eclipse And he picked his nose For a full ass minute Sitting at the stop sign That's a gobstopper's worth in our time Pull all the clocks back, Pull the fool over, You just got fined It was Friday for nothing I was in the hatchback, Scratch that Sour patch Should have called Pat back Now I'm just a Cool 48 in the ring with a date And the cashapp Continuity construction I want a husband! Fuck that. I want a clean cut plus one Since I can't have Helmet, Elmo, Or Hatchetman; Tears of a Clow…no, Wait I lost focus Half finished album Got 6 tracks But I knew it was 12 from the get go Prob‘ly should have knocked off the showrunner; Nah, I'm sure I had that coming Hashtag, undon Could have been you, too If the cash came through Now it's hard times Hardwired Sitting on a hi wire, Little white liar, liar Wait I made Katey Sagal (Fire) Cut off her hair (Fire) Went to the hall of fame with the framed sunglasses Asked for her autograf, But she walked off So I shot her with a bottle/ can, But she ducked, popped back up With the brass knuckles Surfboard Good for a chuckle and a fuck So I asked for her number All that on a Sunday at Gelson's market. Christ, almighty I miss Walmart, I hit hard times. So many places to run, But not many places to hide I think I want to die here I think i want to die. City of corruption… Lay it out and lay it over City of corruption… no, it's not a choice It's a black tie function Right in that very moment Seth Meyers kind of became my defacto personal hero. “Never meet your heroes” Or perhaps it was just his writing team, or the fact that maybe even without there even being anything set in stone or solid at all, [redacted] itself seemed to have a price over my head– It all seemed to make sense; in fact, all the crazy things i was experiencing made more sense than it didn't. But after what felt something like between defeat and maybe even one day really getting justice for all the things that had happened to me in new york– it was that, at best; That without actually meaning it, by all probability, the opening monologue described what in perfect sense the thing that had been happening to me: hundreds of motorcycles and cars riding around in circles for over a year, any time i tried to work or sleep–and then, when I finally tried to reach out to find an attorney that would help, I was made to feel crazy for it. In a way, it was the perfect indication that it had all been some sort of sick game, and that I was more right than wrong, and being set up to appear, sound, or look crazy–but I wasn't. I had been under attack for nearly two years, and when I tried to reach out, my heart raced and my voice cracked, and I sounded crazy and desperate–but what was happening was very real; and now I knew where I was. As it turns out, New York's corruption was more common knowledge to everyone else before it was to me: New York was a common place for fucked up, dirty, low-down mind games: and this was my lesson in that. Seth Meyers in reality had nothing to do with it–and really I only meant to watch Kimmel over my afternoon tacos. But still, though it hadn't entirely anything to do with me, the opening statements rang true to exactly what I had experienced; I was made to lose my mind, only to have everyone around me tell me it was something wrong with me–but it wasn't. Something was wrong with the city, and the building management, and the people around who were making it all to be some kind of mental disorder or problems with my mind–in reality, it was 2 years of being in the center of a speedway, and all the time i'd lost because of it adding to the stress, and the angst, and the depression that resulted. Moo. Moo… Moo. Moo, sir. I'll kill you. You promise? I want to. Don't get me excited over nothing; If this isn't the exit, please take this tease To the left, dear Moo, cow My honor Level one, and brother, you've got nothing Flip the coin and landed on your headache Betting on your helmet Standing on my cock, i'm taller (Not a rooster) But my ops are rooting for you, No informants, Dont you know I was a collar, all along? I was a shot calling, Cop calling Kiss-and-tell all as the night goes on. But oh, I brought you a dollar bra Oh, I bought you for all of a dollar And oh, I'm so much taller, Standing on my cock But i'm not but ten feet tall You know, you wrote that Should i open the book, or close that Caught that cat, owl and As i soft spoke at Every broken model Broken bottle for the thoughts you owe Across the scatters skies and no one ever knows When you're realling coming over Come on, I'm on the pornhub Just to pick up another one Go on, and rub the bottle One more once, To call the Bubbles. Damn. Come. (The Monkey obeys) You should see Michael in all of his godform You won't recognize him at all if not by the eyes When you follow home Believe me, this not comes close to it; The one you wanted The world you jumped to but were just short of Call her back Oh no, you're wrong It's another song A pin up girl And the wrong number Okah. Okah, Pablo. Time can be altered, changed or effected presently in any omnidirectional plane by engaging certain acts or synchronicities within multidimensional parallels or adjacent realms in time and or space respectively. –the reverse quantum simulation theory. Does anyone else smell blood I hate wedding days suits and tuxedos No, I don't know you I'm just here to sound the hundred drums Of the once before us (The ones to come) Then, there we were and I didn't want to admit Again, I was caught into the ghost of the rapture Or the holy hour, No aux chord Show the holy one Just how old you are On these sacr d lands and a holy grounds Now I want here half an ounce to smoke And there were drowning orchestras in all of the hearts And all of the markets, The market the marker And all of the sins of the savior The maytyr Did you remember not to notice not to know him Were you sure with words you were for nickelodeaon! I was supposed to hold on to, Supposed to hold on to Suddenly, it's summer. And always our own are under the weather There was no other wise man the wind. Lee the one came The site came and went and then the songs went left The songs went left; Again, the songs went left Did you win at wintergreen Well, God, I didn't know gym was a game. I didn't know guns we're just portals to worlds unknownn I didn't know gossip was golden What all else didn't I know It wasn't for here! It was fourth flour And in the final hour of the battle I commenced to summon All the gods and all the lords and all the flowers All the worlds of oceans and the Remember, this The remembrance It may not matter to some, What matters to most But until summer comes, I'm still up under the rail And practically it's spring, for the next two weeks I'm all berries and cream and whatever you wanted. Tormaline, emerald and onyx, the fox said And fox says its west when instead it's quite under what of the reporter's offer? Comes down a little to none What of the offer Comes down from a billion to one A billion to one I'm on TV so it's really just a one way screen Either way, I don't think he likes me much I don't think he likes me much I'd rather die than to fall in love even one more time And to keep on just never being loved Never beingbloved {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project™ ] {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S: ICONS Tales of A Superstar DJ The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū Ascension Deathwish -Ū. Copyright © The Festival Project, Inc. ™ | Copyright The Complex Collective © 2019-2025 ™ All Rights Reserved. -Ū.

Todaywe're continuing in Luke 23:32-34. These three verses introduce us to Jesusbeing on the cross at Golgotha. This is one of the most special passages ofScripture in the Bible. All the Bible in the Old Testament points to this time,and all the time after this, points back to this time. This is the center andfocal point of eternity. This is where God Himself, who has taken on humanflesh, dies on a cross for all humanity. Jesus, God manifest in the flesh, camefor this very purpose and hour. Even while Jesus is suffering one of the mostcruel and painful deaths a human can experience, He is expressing compassionfor other Ithad been prophesied in Isaiah 53:12 that the Suffering Servant would be "numberedwith the transgressors". Jesus Himself mentioned this passage on Hisway to the cross in Luke 22:37. This is fulfilled by the fact that twocriminals were crucified with Jesus, men who were robbers according to Matthew27:38. The Greek word means "one who uses violence to rob openly," incontrast to the thief who secretly enters a house and steals. These two men mayhave been guilty of armed robbery involving murder. Lukepoints out in verse 33 that Jesus “was crucified in a place called Calvary”.The name Calvary comes from the Latin calvaria which means "askull." (The Greek is kranion, which gives us the English word cranium,and the Aramaic word is Golgotha.) The name is not explained in the NewTestament. The site may have resembled a skull, as does "Gordon'sCalvary" near the Damascus Gate in Jerusalem. Or perhaps the namesimply grew out of the ugly facts of execution. There are many who believe thatJesus was crucified and buried in a place in Old City Jerusalem that today is knownas the “Church of the Holy Sepulchre”, which is one of the most visited touristsites in all the world. At Gordon's Tomb, the guides always remind us that thewhether the place is there or at the church site, the main thing is that Jesuswas crucified. OurLord was crucified about 9 a.m. and remained on the cross until 3 p.m.; andfrom noon to 3 p.m., there was darkness over all the land (Mark 15:25, 33).Jesus spoke seven times during those six terrible hours: "Father,forgive them" (Luke 23:34). "Todayyou will be with Me in paradise" (Luke 23:43). "Woman,behold your son" (John 19:25-27).(Thenthe three hours of darkness when Jesus is silent) "MyGod, My God, why have you forsaken Me?" (Matt. 27:46) "Ithirst" (John 19:28). "Itis finished!" (John 19:30) "Father,into Your hands I commit My spirit" (Luke 23:46).  Lukerecorded only three of these seven statements, the first, the second, and thelast. Our Lord's prayer for His enemies, and His ministry to a repentant thief,fit in well with Luke's purpose to show Jesus Christ as the sympathetic,compassionate Son of man who cared for the needy. Whilethey were nailing Him to the cross, He repeatedly prayed, "Father, forgivethem; for they know not what they do" (Luke 23:34). Not only was Hepracticing what He taught (Luke 6:27-28), but He was fulfilling prophecy andmaking "intercession for the transgressors" (Isaiah 53:12). Wemust not infer from His prayer that ignorance is a basis for forgiveness, orthat those who sinned against Jesus were automatically forgiven because Heprayed. Certainly, both the Jews and the Romans were ignorant of the enormityof their sin, but that could not absolve them. The Law provided a sacrifice forsins committed ignorantly, but there was no sacrifice for deliberatepresumptuous sin (Ex. 21:14; Num. 15:27-31; Ps. 51:16-17). It is possible thatit was our Lord's intercession that postponed God's judgment on the nation foralmost forty years, giving them additional opportunities to be saved (Acts3:17-19).  Christ'slove and compassion is still being expressed today giving us ample time torepent and be saved. Godbless!

My God, My God, Why?

"Are you ready to experience true financial peace in the midst of uncertainty?

You may not always feel like praising, especially in a battle. But that's when praise is most powerful. Worship isn't a soft response—it's a spiritual strike. When you lift your hands, the enemy loses his grip. When you raise your voice, chains start falling. Worship is how warriors breathe in the fire.Our springboard for today's discussion is:“Now when they began to sing and to praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men... who had come against Judah, so that they were routed.” — 2 Chronicles 20:22 (ESV)Judah didn't win that battle with swords. They didn't fight it with strategy. They sent out worshippers—and God ambushed the enemy.Let that settle in.Sometimes God doesn't call you to fight harder—He calls you to sing louder.Worship shifts the atmosphere. It realigns your spirit. It reminds your soul who your King is—and who the enemy isn't. Worship tells hell, “I may be in a storm, but I'm not shaken. My God is still worthy.”You may think you need a breakthrough before you can praise. But it's often your praise that creates the breakthrough.When Paul and Silas were in prison, they didn't wait for the doors to open. They worshiped in chains—and the chains broke.Don't underestimate the power of your song. Even if it's off-key. Even if it's tear-soaked. Even if it's whispered through fear. Heaven hears it. Hell fears it.Worship reminds you that the battle belongs to the Lord—and He's never lost one yet.Question of the Day:When was the last time you worshiped in the middle of a fight—not just after the victory?Mini Call to Action:Put on a worship song today—not for background noise, but as your battle cry. Sing it. Mean it. Let it rise louder than the storm.Let's Pray:God, teach me to worship even when it's hard. Let praise rise in my heart before the victory is visible. I trust that You fight for me, and I'll meet You on the battlefield—singing. In Jesus' name, amen.Let's Get To Work!Don't wait to feel strong. Worship now. Watch God move.My Reasons To Believe is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit myr2b.substack.com/subscribe

You may not always feel like praising, especially in a battle. But that's when praise is most powerful. Worship isn't a soft response—it's a spiritual strike. When you lift your hands, the enemy loses his grip. When you raise your voice, chains start falling. Worship is how warriors breathe in the fire.Our springboard for today's discussion is:“Now when they began to sing and to praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men... who had come against Judah, so that they were routed.” — 2 Chronicles 20:22 (ESV)Judah didn't win that battle with swords. They didn't fight it with strategy. They sent out worshippers—and God ambushed the enemy.Let that settle in.Sometimes God doesn't call you to fight harder—He calls you to sing louder.Worship shifts the atmosphere. It realigns your spirit. It reminds your soul who your King is—and who the enemy isn't. Worship tells hell, “I may be in a storm, but I'm not shaken. My God is still worthy.”You may think you need a breakthrough before you can praise. But it's often your praise that creates the breakthrough.When Paul and Silas were in prison, they didn't wait for the doors to open. They worshiped in chains—and the chains broke.Don't underestimate the power of your song. Even if it's off-key. Even if it's tear-soaked. Even if it's whispered through fear. Heaven hears it. Hell fears it.Worship reminds you that the battle belongs to the Lord—and He's never lost one yet.Question of the Day:When was the last time you worshiped in the middle of a fight—not just after the victory?Mini Call to Action:Put on a worship song today—not for background noise, but as your battle cry. Sing it. Mean it. Let it rise louder than the storm.Let's Pray:God, teach me to worship even when it's hard. Let praise rise in my heart before the victory is visible. I trust that You fight for me, and I'll meet You on the battlefield—singing. In Jesus' name, amen.Let's Get To Work!Don't wait to feel strong. Worship now. Watch God move.My Reasons To Believe is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit myr2b.substack.com/subscribe

Jennie Garth is best known to Gen-Xers for her iconic role playing Kelly Taylor on the megahit television series Beverly Hills 90210.  Fans of the show may remember Kelly's pivotal “I Choose Me” episode (airing thirty years ago this past May) when she stood between dreamboats Brandon and Dylan and declared that she was choosing herself.  Jennie shaped an entire era of pop culture, and now, at fifty-two, she is embracing an incredible new chapter of life—one filled with bold conversations about aging, empowerment, self-love, and the beautiful messiness of midlife. Through her thought-provoking “I Choose Me” podcast and a forthcoming memoir of the same name, Jennie is using her platform to champion other women over fifty by challenging outdated narratives around aging and sparking empowering conversations. Today, Jennie, Jen and Amy talk about what choosing yourself looks like on a normal day, and what it means to be graduate beyond our growing family years into a more independent space where a new age of self-discovery is possible because, as Jennie reminds us, choosing “you” isn't selfish—it's the most powerful act of self-respect. Thought-provoking Quotes: “It was through my conversations with fans, whether it was on social media. or at autograph events that I kept hearing, ‘I didn't know I could choose me until Kelly Taylor told me it was an option.'” – Jennie Garth “If I had gone to college and lived a normal life, then I would have learned things that I didn't actually end up learning until I was in my forties and fifties. So now I'm just searching like, ‘What did I miss and how can I be better? How can I learn more about myself?'” – Jennie Garth “You look around on social media and you see other people's lives and think, ‘My God, they have it all figured out.' And I just never felt like that personally.” – Jennie Garth “Loving yourself is a journey and it's imperative to your wellbeing.” – Jennie Garth “I don't want to please people by being what they want me to be or fitting into this character's shoes. I love acting and I'll never not love acting. But I had to take the bull by the horns and take control of my life.” – Jennie Garth “Competition amongst women was real. It was just part of the  world I grew up in. I had to be better than the next girl. What a waste of so much precious time and energy. I used to be intimidated by other women's success or knowledge or position. I kick myself for all the years of lost opportunity of that kind of camaraderie and connection with other women. I feel it so strongly now. It's something that can never be quieted again,” – Jennie Garth Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990-2000) - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098749/ Tori Spelling - https://www.instagram.com/p/DKAANczu145/?hl=en I Choose Me Women's Summit 2025 - https://jenniegarth.com/pages/i-choose-me-movement I Choose Me: Chasing Joy, Finding Purpose & Embracing Reinvention by Jennie Garth - https://amzn.to/44d8eMM Me by Jennie Garth QVC Collection - https://jenniegarth.com/pages/me-by-jennie-garth Feeding America - https://www.feedingamerica.org/partners/entertainment-council/jennie-garth American Heart Association - https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/at-the-heart-of-it-with-nancy-brown/the-power-of-positivity-with-jennie-garth Guest's Links: Website - https://jenniegarth.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jenniegarth/ Twitter - https://x.com/jenniegarth Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jenniegarth TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@officialjenniegarth Podcast - https://jenniegarth.com/pages/i-choose-me-podcast Connect with Jen!Jen's Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/ Jen's Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmakerJen's Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/ Jen's Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmakerJen's YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmaker The For the Love Podcast is presented by Audacy.  To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? Psalm 22:1Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“Tell me I pray thee wherein thy great strength lieth.” — Judges 16:6 Where lies the secret strength of faith? It lies in the food it feeds on; for faith studies what the promise is — an emanation of divine grace, an overflowing of the great heart of God; and faith says, “My God could […]

Dive into the amazing world of electric eels: what they really are (spoiler—they're not true eels!), how their special electric organs work, and how they use electricity to hunt and protect themselves in the rivers of South America. Here's our trail map:What Is the Electric Eel?How Do Electric Eels Make Electricity?How Does the Electric Eel Use Electricity?What Does the Bible Say About Electricity?Episode Links:Explore the Answers Bible Curriculum by Answers in Genesis: AnswersBookstore.com/bibleTry CTCMath for free for one week: https://ctcmath.com/Order Eryn's book: The Nature of Rest: What the Bible and Creation Teach Us About Sabbath Living: https://www.amazon.com/Nature-Rest-Creation-Sabbath-Living/dp/0825448891Nat Theo Club Bonus Video: https://erynlynum.com/club-videosGet full lesson guides in the Nat Theo Club: https://erynlynum.com/clubFree Electric Eel Coloring Sheet: https://erynlynum.com/electric-eel-facts/Ask your nature question: https://erynlynum.com/askOrder Eryn's book, Rooted in Wonder: Nurturing Your Family's Faith Through God's Creation: https://www.amazon.com/Rooted-Wonder-Nurturing-Familys-Creation/dp/0825447615Scriptures Referenced in This Episode:“The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.” Psalm 28:7 (NIV)“You are my refuge and my shield; I have put my hope in your word.” Psalm 119:14 (NIV)“The LORD is my rock, my protection, my Savior. My God is my rock. I can run to him for safety. He is my shield and my saving strength, my defender.” Psalm 18:2 (NCV)“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1 (ESV)Terms Learned in This Episode:Gymnotiforms: Meaning “naked back.” A category (order) of fish that do not have fins on their back.Organ: A special part inside a body with an important job to do. Main, Hunter's and Sachs Organs: Special organs in an electric eel's body that produce electricity.Cells: Tiny building blocks that make up all living things, like plants, creatures, and humans. They are so small you can only see them with a microscope.Electrocytes: Special cells with positive and negative charges.Weakly Electric Fish: Electric fish in the gymnotiform order that use an invisible electric field around their body to sense what is around them.Strongly Electric Fish: Electric fish in the gymnotiform order that create and emit strong electric currents to zap and stun their prey.Electric Organ Discharge (EOD): When an electric fish sends out an electric pulse or wave.This podcast episode contains paid advertisements. Mentioned in this episode:Explore...

Morning lessons: Psalms 122; Ruth 4; 1 Corinthians 9.  My God, my God, why have you forsaken me, and are so far from my cry and from the words of my complaint?

Frances Wilson has written biographies of Dorothy Wordsworth, Thomas De Quincey, D.H. Lawrence, and, most recently, Muriel Spark. I thought Electric Spark was excellent. In my review, I wrote: “Wilson has done far more than string the facts together. She has created a strange and vivid portrait of one of the most curious of twentieth century novelists.” In this interview, we covered questions like why Thomas De Quincey is more widely read, why D.H. Lawrence's best books aren't his novels, Frances's conversion to spookiness, what she thinks about a whole range of modern biographers, literature and parasocial relationships, Elizabeth Bowen, George Meredith, and plenty about Muriel Spark.Here are two brief extracts. There is a full transcript below.Henry: De Quincey and Lawrence were the people you wrote about before Muriel Spark, and even though they seem like three very different people, but in their own way, they're all a little bit mad, aren't they?Frances: Yes, that is, I think, something that they have in common. It's something that I'm drawn to. I like writing about difficult people. I don't think I could write about anyone who wasn't difficult. I like difficult people in general. I like the fact that they pose a puzzle and they're hard to crack, and that their difficulty is laid out in their work and as a code. I like tackling really, really stubborn personalities as well. Yes, they were all a bit mad. The madness was what fuelled their journeys without doubt.Henry: This must make it very hard as a biographer. Is there always a code to be cracked, or are you sometimes dealing with someone who is slippery and protean and uncrackable?And.Henry: People listening will be able to tell that Spark is a very spooky person in several different ways. She had what I suppose we would call spiritual beliefs to do with ghosts and other sorts of things. You had a sort of conversion of your own while writing this book, didn't you?Frances: Yes, I did. [laughs] Every time I write a biography, I become very, very, very immersed in who I'm writing about. I learned this from Richard Holmes, who I see as a method biographer. He Footsteps his subjects. He becomes his subjects. I think I recognized when I first read Holmes's Coleridge, when I was a student, that this was how I also wanted to live. I wanted to live inside the minds of the people that I wrote about, because it was very preferable to live inside my own mind. Why not live inside the mind of someone really, really exciting, one with genius?What I felt with Spark wasn't so much that I was immersed by-- I wasn't immersed by her. I felt actually possessed by her. I think this is the Spark effect. I think a lot of her friends felt like this. I think that her lovers possibly felt like this. There is an extraordinary force to her character, which absolutely lives on, even though she's dead, but only recently dead. The conversion I felt, I think, was that I have always been a very enlightenment thinker, very rational, very scientific, very Freudian in my approach to-- I will acknowledge the unconscious but no more.By the time I finished with Spark, I'm pure woo-woo now.TranscriptHenry: Today, I am talking to Frances Wilson. Frances is a biographer. Her latest book, Electric Spark, is a biography of the novelist Muriel Spark, but she has also written about Dorothy Wordsworth, Thomas De Quincey, DH Lawrence and others. Frances, welcome.Frances Wilson: Thank you so much for having me on.Henry: Why don't more people read Thomas De Quincey's work?Frances: [laughs] Oh, God. We're going right into the deep end.[laughter]Frances: I think because there's too much of it. When I chose to write about Thomas De Quincey, I just followed one thread in his writing because Thomas De Quincey was an addict. One of the things he was addicted to was writing. He wrote far, far, far too much. He was a professional hack. He was a transcendental hack, if you like, because all of his writing he did while on opium, which made the sentences too long and too high and very, very hard to read.When I wrote about him, I just followed his interest in murder. He was fascinated by murder as a fine art. The title of one of his best essays is On Murder as One of the Fine Arts. I was also interested in his relationship with Wordsworth. I twinned those together, which meant cutting out about 97% of the rest of his work. I think people do read his Confessions of an English Opium-Eater. I think that's a cult text. It was the memoir, if you want to call it a memoir, that kick-started the whole pharmaceutical memoir business on drugs.It was also the first addict's memoir and the first recovery memoir, and I'd say also the first misery memoir. He's very much at the root of English literary culture. We're all De Quincey-an without knowing it, is my argument.Henry: Oh, no, I fully agree. That's what surprises me, that they don't read him more often.Frances: I know it's a shame, isn't it? Of all the Romantic Circle, he's the one who's the most exciting to read. Also, Lamb is wonderfully exciting to read as well, but Lamb's a tiny little bit more grounded than De Quincey, who was literally not grounded. He's floating in an opium haze above you.[laughter]Henry: What I liked about your book was the way you emphasized the book addiction, not just the opium addiction. It is shocking the way he piled up chests full of books and notebooks, and couldn't get into the room because there were too many books in there. He was [crosstalk].Frances: Yes. He had this in common with Muriel Spark. He was a hoarder, but in a much more chaotic way than Spark, because, as you say, he piled up rooms with papers and books until he couldn't get into the room, and so just rented another room. He was someone who had no money at all. The no money he had went on paying rent for rooms, storing what we would be giving to Oxfam, or putting in the recycling bin. Then he'd forget that he was paying rent on all these rooms filled with his mountains of paper. The man was chaos.Henry: What is D.H. Lawrence's best book?Frances: Oh, my argument about Lawrence is that we've gone very badly wrong in our reading of him, in seeing him primarily as a novelist and only secondarily as an essayist and critic and short story writer, and poet. This is because of F.R. Leavis writing that celebration of him called D.H. Lawrence: Novelist, because novels are not the best of Lawrence. I think the best of his novels is absolutely, without doubt, Sons and Lovers. I think we should put the novels in the margins and put in the centre, the poems, travel writing.Absolutely at the centre of the centre should be his studies in classic American literature. His criticism was- We still haven't come to terms with it. It was so good. We haven't heard all of Lawrence's various voices yet. When Lawrence was writing, contemporaries didn't think of Lawrence as a novelist at all. It was anyone's guess what he was going to come out with next. Sometimes it was a novel [laughs] and it was usually a rant about-- sometimes it was a prophecy. Posterity has not treated Lawrence well in any way, but I think where we've been most savage to him is in marginalizing his best writing.Henry: The short fiction is truly extraordinary.Frances: Isn't it?Henry: I always thought Lawrence was someone I didn't want to read, and then I read the short fiction, and I was just obsessed.Frances: It's because in the short fiction, he doesn't have time to go wrong. I think brevity was his perfect length. Give him too much space, and you know he's going to get on his soapbox and start ranting, start mansplaining. He was a terrible mansplainer. Mansplaining his versions of what had gone wrong in the world. It is like a drunk at the end of a too-long dinner party, and you really want to just bundle him out. Give him only a tiny bit of space, and he comes out with the perfection that is his writing.Henry: De Quincey and Lawrence were the people you wrote about before Muriel Spark, and even though they seem like three very different people, but in their own way, they're all a little bit mad, aren't they?Frances: Yes, that is, I think, something that they have in common. It's something that I'm drawn to. I like writing about difficult people. I don't think I could write about anyone who wasn't difficult. I like difficult people in general. I like the fact that they pose a puzzle and they're hard to crack, and that their difficulty is laid out in their work and as a code. I like tackling really, really stubborn personalities as well. Yes, they were all a bit mad. The madness was what fuelled their journeys without doubt.Henry: This must make it very hard as a biographer. Is there always a code to be cracked, or are you sometimes dealing with someone who is slippery and protean and uncrackable?Frances: I think that the way I approach biography is that there is a code to crack, but I'm not necessarily concerned with whether I crack it or not. I think it's just recognizing that there's a hell of a lot going on in the writing and that, in certain cases and not in every case at all, the best way of exploring the psyche of the writer and the complexity of the life is through the writing, which is a argument for psycho biography, which isn't something I necessarily would argue for, because it can be very, very crude.I think with the writers I choose, there is no option. Muriel Spark argued for this as well. She said in her own work as a biographer, which was really very, very strong. She was a biographer before she became a novelist. She thought hard about biography and absolutely in advance of anyone else who thought about biography, she said, "Of course, the only way we can approach the minds of writers is through their work, and the writer's life is encoded in the concerns of their work."When I was writing about Muriel Spark, I followed, as much as I could, to the letter, her own theories of biography, believing that that was part of the code that she left. She said very, very strong and very definitive things about what biography was about and how to write a biography. I tried to follow those rules.Henry: Can we play a little game where I say the names of some biographers and you tell me what you think of them?Frances: Oh my goodness. Okay.Henry: We're not trying to get you into trouble. We just want some quick opinions. A.N. Wilson.Frances: I think he's wonderful as a biographer. I think he's unzipped and he's enthusiastic and he's unpredictable and he's often off the rails. I think his Goethe biography-- Have you read the Goethe biography?Henry: Yes, I thought that was great.Frances: It's just great, isn't it? It's so exciting. I like the way that when he writes about someone, it's almost as if he's memorized the whole of their work.Henry: Yes.Frances: You don't imagine him sitting at a desk piled with books and having to score through his marginalia. It sits in his head, and he just pours it down on a page. I'm always excited by an A.N. Wilson biography. He is one of the few biographers who I would read regardless of who the subject was.Henry: Yes.Frances: I just want to read him.Henry: He does have good range.Frances: He absolutely does have good range.Henry: Selina Hastings.Frances: I was thinking about Selina Hastings this morning, funnily enough, because I had been talking to people over the weekend about her Sybil Bedford biography and why that hadn't lifted. She wrote a very excitingly good life of Nancy Mitford and then a very unexcitingly not good life of Sybil Bedford. I was interested in why the Sybil Bedford simply hadn't worked. I met people this weekend who were saying the same thing, that she was a very good biographer who had just failed [laughs] to give us anything about Sybil Bedford.I think what went wrong in that biography was that she just could not give us her opinions. It's as if she just withdrew from her subject as if she was writing a Wikipedia entry. There were no opinions at all. What the friends I was talking to said was that she just fell out with her subject during the book. That's what happened. She stopped being interested in her. She fell out with her and therefore couldn't be bothered. That's what went wrong.Henry: Interesting. I think her Evelyn Waugh biography is superb.Frances: Yes, I absolutely agree. She was on fire until this last one.Henry: That's one of the best books on Waugh, I think.Frances: Yes.Henry: Absolutely magical.Frances: I also remember, it's a very rare thing, of reading a review of it by Hilary Mantel saying that she had not read a biography that had been as good, ever, as Selina Hastings' on Evelyn Waugh. My goodness, that's high praise, isn't it?Henry: Yes, it is. It is. I'm always trying to push that book on people. Richard Holmes.Frances: He's my favourite. He's the reason that I'm a biographer at all. I think his Coleridge, especially the first volume of the two-volume Coleridge, is one of the great books. It left me breathless when I read it. It was devastating. I also think that his Johnson and Savage book is one of the great books. I love Footsteps as well, his account of the books he didn't write in Footsteps. I think he has a strange magic. When Muriel Spark talked about certain writers and critics having a sixth literary sense, which meant that they tuned into language and thought in a way that the rest of us don't, I think that Richard Holmes does have that. I think he absolutely has it in relation to Coleridge. I'm longing for his Tennyson to come out.Henry: Oh, I know. I know.Frances: Oh, I just can't wait. I'm holding off on reading Tennyson until I've got Holmes to help me read him. Yes, he is quite extraordinary.Henry: I would have given my finger to write the Johnson and Savage book.Frances: Yes, I know. I agree. How often do you return to it?Henry: Oh, all the time. All the time.Frances: Me too.Henry: Michael Holroyd.Frances: Oh, that's interesting, Michael Holroyd, because I think he's one of the great unreads. I think he's in this strange position of being known as a greatest living biographer, but nobody's read him on Augustus John. [laughs] I haven't read his biographies cover to cover because they're too long and it's not in my subject area, but I do look in them, and they're novelistic in their wit and complexity. His sentences are very, very, very entertaining, and there's a lot of freight in each paragraph. I hope that he keeps selling.I love his essays as well, and also, I think that he has been a wonderful ambassador for biography. He's very, very supportive of younger biographers, which not every biographer is, but I know he's been very supportive of younger biographers and is incredibly approachable.Henry: Let's do a few Muriel Spark questions. Why was the Book of Job so important to Muriel Spark?Frances: I think she liked it because it was rogue, because it was the only book of the Bible that wasn't based on any evidence, it wasn't based on any truth. It was a fictional book, and she liked fiction sitting in the middle of fact. That was one of her main things, as all Spark lovers know. She liked the fact that there was this work of pure imagination and extraordinarily powerful imagination sitting in the middle of the Old Testament, and also, she thought it was an absolutely magnificent poem.She saw herself primarily as a poet, and she responded to it as a poem, which, of course, it is. Also, she liked God in it. She described Him as the Incredible Hulk [laughs] and she liked His boastfulness. She enjoyed, as I do, difficult personalities, and she liked the fact that God had such an incredibly difficult personality. She liked the fact that God boasted and boasted and boasted, "I made this and I made that," to Job, but also I think she liked the fact that you hear God's voice.She was much more interested in voices than she was in faces. The fact that God's voice comes out of the burning bush, I think it was an image for her of early radio, this voice speaking, and she liked the fact that what the voice said was tricksy and touchy and impossibly arrogant. He gives Moses all these instructions to lead the Israelites, and Moses says, "But who shall I say sent me? Who are you?" He says, "I am who I am." [laughs] She thought that was completely wonderful. She quotes that all the time about herself. She says, "I know it's a bit large quoting God, but I am who I am." [laughs]Henry: That disembodied voice is very important to her fiction.Frances: Yes.Henry: It's the telephone in Memento Mori.Frances: Yes.Henry: Also, to some extent, tell me what you think of this, the narrator often acts like that.Frances: Like this disembodied voice?Henry: Yes, like you're supposed to feel like you're not quite sure who's telling you this or where you're being told it from. That's why it gets, like in The Ballad of Peckham Rye or something, very weird.Frances: Yes. I'm waiting for the PhD on Muriel Sparks' narrators. Maybe it's being done as we speak, but she's very, very interested in narrators and the difference between first-person and third-person. She was very keen on not having warm narrators, to put it mildly. She makes a strong argument throughout her work for the absence of the seductive narrative. Her narratives are, as we know, unbelievably seductive, but not because we are being flattered as readers and not because the narrator makes herself or himself pretty. The narrator says what they feel like saying, withholds most of what you would like them to say, plays with us, like in a Spark expression, describing her ideal narrator like a cat with a bird [laughs].Henry: I like that. Could she have been a novelist if she had not become a Catholic?Frances: No, she couldn't. The two things happened at the same time. I wonder, actually, whether she became a Catholic in order to become a novelist. It wasn't that becoming a novelist was an accidental effect of being a Catholic. The conversion was, I think, from being a biographer to a novelist rather than from being an Anglican to a Catholic. What happened is a tremendous interest. I think it's the most interesting moment in any life that I've ever written about is the moment of Sparks' conversion because it did break her life in two.She converted when she was in her mid-30s, and several things happened at once. She converted to Catholicism, she became a Catholic, she became a novelist, but she also had this breakdown. The breakdown was very much part of that conversion package. The breakdown was brought on, she says, by taking Dexys. There was slimming pills, amphetamines. She wanted to lose weight. She put on weight very easily, and her weight went up and down throughout her life.She wanted to take these diet pills, but I think she was also taking the pills because she needed to do all-nighters, because she never, ever, ever stopped working. She was addicted to writing, but also she was impoverished and she had to sell her work, and she worked all night. She was in a rush to get her writing done because she'd wasted so much of her life in her early 20s, in a bad marriage trapped in Africa. She needed to buy herself time. She was on these pills, which have terrible side effects, one of which is hallucinations.I think there were other reasons for her breakdown as well. She was very, very sensitive and I think psychologically fragile. Her mother lived in a state of mental fragility, too. She had a crash when she finished her book. She became depressed. Of course, a breakdown isn't the same as depression, but what happened to her in her breakdown was a paranoid attack rather than a breakdown. She didn't crack into nothing and then have to rebuild herself. She just became very paranoid. That paranoia was always there.Again, it's what's exciting about her writing. She was drawn to paranoia in other writers. She liked Cardinal Newman's paranoia. She liked Charlotte Brontë's paranoia, and she had paranoia. During her paranoid attack, she felt very, very interestingly, because nothing that happened in her life was not interesting, that T.S. Eliot was sending her coded messages. He was encoding these messages in his play, The Confidential Clerk, in the program notes to the play, but also in the blurbs he wrote for Faber and Faber, where he was an editor. These messages were very malign and they were encoded in anagrams.The word lived, for example, became devil. I wonder whether one of the things that happened during her breakdown wasn't that she discovered God, but that she met the devil. I don't think that that's unusual as a conversion experience. In fact, the only conversion experience she ever describes, you'll remember, is in The Girls of Slender Means, when she's describing Nicholas Farrington's conversion. That's the only conversion experience she ever describes. She says that his conversion is when he sees one of the girls leaving the burning building, holding a Schiaparelli dress. Suddenly, he's converted because he's seen a vision of evil.She says, "Conversion can be as a result of a recognition of evil, rather than a recognition of good." I think that what might have happened in this big cocktail of things that happened to her during her breakdown/conversion, is that a writer whom she had idolized, T.S. Eliot, who taught her everything that she needed to know about the impersonality of art. Her narrative coldness comes from Eliot, who thought that emotions had no place in art because they were messy, and art should be clean.I think a writer whom she had idolized, she suddenly felt was her enemy because she was converting from his church, because he was an Anglo-Catholic. He was a high Anglican, and she was leaving Anglo-Catholicism to go through the Rubicon, to cross the Rubicon into Catholicism. She felt very strongly that that is something he would not have approved of.Henry: She's also leaving poetry to become a prose writer.Frances: She was leaving his world of poetry. That's absolutely right.Henry: This is a very curious parallel because the same thing exactly happens to De Quincey with his worship of Wordsworth.Frances: You're right.Henry: They have the same obsessive mania. Then this, as you say, not quite a breakdown, but a kind of explosive mania in the break. De Quincey goes out and destroys that mossy hut or whatever it is in the orchard, doesn't he?Frances: Yes, that disgusting hut in the orchard. Yes, you're completely right. What fascinated me about De Quincey, and this was at the heart of the De Quincey book, was how he had been guided his whole life by Wordsworth. He discovered Wordsworth as a boy when he read We Are Seven, that very creepy poem about a little girl sitting on her sibling's grave, describing the sibling as still alive. For De Quincey, who had lost his very adored sister, he felt that Wordsworth had seen into his soul and that Wordsworth was his mentor and his lodestar.He worshipped Wordsworth as someone who understood him and stalked Wordsworth, pursued and stalked him. When he met him, what he discovered was a man without any redeeming qualities at all. He thought he was a dry monster, but it didn't stop him loving the work. In fact, he loved the work more and more. What threw De Quincey completely was that there was such a difference between Wordsworth, the man who had no genius, and Wordsworth, the poet who had nothing but.Eliot described it, the difference between the man who suffers and the mind which creates. What De Quincey was trying to deal with was the fact that he adulated the work, but was absolutely appalled by the man. Yes, you're right, this same experience happened to spark when she began to feel that T.S. Eliot, whom she had never met, was a malign person, but the work was still not only of immense importance to her, but the work had formed her.Henry: You see the Wasteland all over her own work and the shared Dante obsession.Frances: Yes.Henry: It's remarkably strong. She got to the point of thinking that T.S. Eliot was breaking into her house.Frances: Yes. As I said, she had this paranoid imagination, but also what fired her imagination and what repeated itself again and again in the imaginative scenarios that recur in her fiction and nonfiction is the idea of the intruder. It was the image of someone rifling around in cupboards, drawers, looking at manuscripts. This image, you first find it in a piece she wrote about finding herself completely coincidentally, staying the night during the war in the poet Louis MacNeice's house. She didn't know it was Louis MacNeice's house, but he was a poet who was very, very important to her.Spark's coming back from visiting her parents in Edinburgh in 1944. She gets talking to an au pair on the train. By the time they pull into Houston, there's an air raid, and the au pair says, "Come and spend the night at mine. My employers are away and they live nearby in St. John's Wood." Spark goes to this house and sees it's packed with books and papers, and she's fascinated by the quality of the material she finds there.She looks in all the books. She goes into the attic, and she looks at all the papers, and she asks the au pair whose house it is, and the au pair said, "Oh, he's a professor called Professor Louis MacNeice." Spark had just been reading Whitney. He's one of her favourite poets. She retells this story four times in four different forms, as non-fiction, as fiction, as a broadcast, as reflections, but the image that keeps coming back, what she can't get rid of, is the idea of herself as snooping around in this poet's study.She describes herself, in one of the versions, as trying to draw from his papers his power as a writer. She says she sniffs his pens, she puts her hands over his papers, telling herself, "I must become a writer. I must become a writer." Then she makes this weird anonymous phone call. She loved the phone because it was the most strange form of electrical device. She makes a weird anonymous phone call to an agent, saying, "I'm ringing from Louis MacNeice's house, would you like to see my manuscript?" She doesn't give her name, and the agent says yes.Now I don't believe this phone call took place. I think it's part of Sparks' imagination. This idea of someone snooping around in someone else's room was very, very powerful to her. Then she transposed it in her paranoid attack about T.S. Eliot. She transposed the image that Eliot was now in her house, but not going through her papers, but going through her food cupboards. [laughs] In her food cupboards, all she actually had was baked beans because she was a terrible cook. Part of her unwellness at that point was malnutrition. No, she thought that T.S. Eliot was spying on her. She was obsessed with spies. Spies, snoopers, blackmailers.Henry: T.S. Eliot is Stealing My Baked Beans would have been a very good title for a memoir.Frances: It actually would, wouldn't it?Henry: Yes, it'd be great.[laughter]Henry: People listening will be able to tell that Spark is a very spooky person in several different ways. She had what I suppose we would call spiritual beliefs to do with ghosts and other sorts of things. You had a sort of conversion of your own while writing this book, didn't you?Frances: Yes, I did. [laughs] Every time I write a biography, I become very, very, very immersed in who I'm writing about. I learned this from Richard Holmes, who I see as a method biographer. He Footsteps his subjects. He becomes his subjects. I think I recognized when I first read Holmes's Coleridge, when I was a student, that this was how I also wanted to live. I wanted to live inside the minds of the people that I wrote about, because it was very preferable to live inside my own mind. Why not live inside the mind of someone really, really exciting, one with genius?What I felt with Spark wasn't so much that I was immersed by-- I wasn't immersed by her. I felt actually possessed by her. I think this is the Spark effect. I think a lot of her friends felt like this. I think that her lovers possibly felt like this. There is an extraordinary force to her character, which absolutely lives on, even though she's dead, but only recently dead. The conversion I felt, I think, was that I have always been a very enlightenment thinker, very rational, very scientific, very Freudian in my approach to-- I will acknowledge the unconscious but no more.By the time I finished with Spark, I'm pure woo-woo now. Anything can happen. This is one of the reasons Spark was attracted to Catholicism because anything can happen, because it legitimizes the supernatural. I felt so strongly that the supernatural experiences that Spark had were real, that what Spark was describing as the spookiness of our own life were things that actually happened.One of the things I found very, very unsettling about her was that everything that happened to her, she had written about first. She didn't describe her experiences in retrospect. She described them as in foresight. For example, her first single authored published book, because she wrote for a while in collaboration with her lover, Derek Stanford, but her first single authored book was a biography of Mary Shelley.Henry: Great book.Frances: An absolutely wonderful book, which really should be better than any of the other Mary Shelley biographies. She completely got to Mary Shelley. Everything she described in Mary Shelley's life would then happen to Spark. For example, she described Mary Shelley as having her love letters sold. Her lover sold Mary Shelley's love letters, and Mary Shelley was then blackmailed by the person who bought them. This happened to Spark. She described Mary Shelley's closest friends all becoming incredibly jealous of her literary talent. This happened to Spark. She described trusting people who betrayed her. This happened to Spark.Spark was the first person to write about Frankenstein seriously, to treat Frankenstein as a masterpiece rather than as a one-off weird novel that is actually just the screenplay for a Hammer Horror film. This was 1951, remember. Everything she described in Frankenstein as its power is a hybrid text, described the powerful hybrid text that she would later write about. What fascinated her in Frankenstein was the relationship between the creator and the monster, and which one was the monster. This is exactly the story of her own life. I think where she is. She was really interested in art monsters and in the fact that the only powerful writers out there, the only writers who make a dent, are monsters.If you're not a monster, you're just not competing. I think Spark has always spoken about as having a monster-like quality. She says at the end of one of her short stories, Bang-bang You're Dead, "Am I an intellectual woman, or am I a monster?" It's the question that is frequently asked of Spark. I think she worked so hard to monsterize herself. Again, she learnt this from Elliot. She learnt her coldness from Elliot. She learnt indifference from Elliot. There's a very good letter where she's writing to a friend, Shirley Hazzard, in New York.It's after she discovers that her lover, Derek Stanford, has sold her love letters, 70 love letters, which describe two very, very painfully raw, very tender love letters. She describes to Shirley Hazzard this terrible betrayal. She says, "But, I'm over it. I'm over it now. Now I'm just going to be indifferent." She's telling herself to just be indifferent about this. You watch her tutoring herself into the indifference that she needed in order to become the artist that she knew she was.Henry: Is this why she's attracted to mediocrities, because she can possess them and monsterize them, and they're good feeding for her artistic programme?Frances: Her attraction to mediocrities is completely baffling, and it makes writing her biography, a comedy, because the men she was surrounded by were so speck-like. Saw themselves as so important, but were, in fact, so speck-like that you have to laugh, and it was one after another after another. I'd never come across, in my life, so many men I'd never heard of. This was the literary world that she was surrounded by. It's odd, I don't know whether, at the time, she knew how mediocre these mediocrities were.She certainly recognised it in her novels where they're all put together into one corporate personality called the pisseur de copie in A Far Cry from Kensington, where every single literary mediocrity is in that critic who she describes as pissing and vomiting out copy. With Derek Stanford, who was obviously no one's ever heard of now, because he wrote nothing that was memorable, he was her partner from the end of the 40s until-- They ceased their sexual relationship when she started to be interested in becoming a Catholic in 1953, but she was devoted to him up until 1958. She seemed to be completely incapable of recognising that she had the genius and he had none.Her letters to him deferred to him, all the time, as having literary powers that she hadn't got, as having insights that she hadn't got, he's better read than she was. She was such an amazingly good critic. Why could she not see when she looked at his baggy, bad prose that it wasn't good enough? She rated him so highly. When she was co-authoring books with him, which was how she started her literary career, they would occasionally write alternative sentences. Some of her sentences are always absolutely-- they're sharp, lean, sparkling, and witty, and his are way too long and really baggy and they don't say anything. Obviously, you can see that she's irritated by it.She still doesn't say, "Look, I'm going now." It was only when she became a novelist that she said, "I want my mind to myself." She puts, "I want my mind to myself." She didn't want to be in a double act with him. Doubles were important to her. She didn't want to be in a double act with him anymore. He obviously had bought into her adulation of him and hadn't recognised that she had this terrifying power as a writer. It was now his turn to have the breakdown. Spark had the mental breakdown in 1950, '45. When her first novel came out in 1957, it was Stanford who had the breakdown because he couldn't take on board who she was as a novelist.What he didn't know about her as a novelist was her comic sense, how that would fuel the fiction, but also, he didn't recognize because he reviewed her books badly. He didn't recognise that the woman who had been so tender, vulnerable, and loving with him could be this novelist who had nothing to say about tenderness or love. In his reviews, he says, "Why are her characters so cold?" because he thought that she should be writing from the core of her as a human being rather than the core of her as an intellect.Henry: What are her best novels?Frances: Every one I read, I think this has to be the best.[laughter]This is particularly the case in the early novels, where I'm dazzled by The Comforters and think there cannot have been a better first novel of the 20th century or even the 21st century so far. The Comforters. Then read Robinson, her second novel, and think, "Oh God, no, that is her best novel. Then Memento Mori, I think, "Actually, that must be the best novel of the 20th century." [laughs] Then you move on to The Ballad of Peckham Rye, I think, "No, that's even better."The novels landed. It's one of the strange things about her; it took her so long to become a novelist. When she had become one, the novels just landed. Once in one year, two novels landed. In 1959, she had, it was The Bachelors and The Ballad of Peckham Rye, both just completely extraordinary. The novels had been the storing up, and then they just fell on the page. They're different, but samey. They're samey in as much as they're very, very, very clever. They're clever about Catholicism, and they have the same narrative wit. My God, do the plots work in different ways. She was wonderful at plots. She was a great plotter. She liked plots in both senses of the world.She liked the idea of plotting against someone, also laying a plot. She was, at the same time, absolutely horrified by being caught inside someone's plot. That's what The Comforters is about, a young writer called Caroline Rose, who has a breakdown, it's a dramatisation of Sparks' own breakdown, who has a breakdown, and believes that she is caught inside someone else's story. She is a typewriter repeating all of her thoughts. Typewriter and a chorus repeating all of her thoughts.What people say about The Comforters is that Caroline Rose thought she is a heroine of a novel who finds herself trapped in a novel. Actually, if you read what Caroline Rose says in the novel, she doesn't think she's trapped in a novel; she thinks she's trapped in a biography. "There is a typewriter typing the story of our lives," she says to her boyfriend. "Of our lives." Muriel Sparks' first book was about being trapped in a biography, which is, of course, what she brought on herself when she decided to trap herself in a biography. [laughs]Henry: I think I would vote for Loitering with Intent, The Girls of Slender Means as my favourites. I can see that Memento Mori is a good book, but I don't love it, actually.Frances: Really? Interesting. Okay. I completely agree with you about-- I think Loitering with Intent is my overall favourite. Don't you find every time you read it, it's a different book? There are about 12 books I've discovered so far in that book. She loved books inside books, but every time I read it, I think, "Oh my God, it's changed shape again. It's a shape-shifting novel."Henry: We all now need the Frances Wilson essay about the 12 books inside Loitering with Intent.Frances: I know.[laughter]Henry: A few more general questions to close. Did Thomas De Quincey waste his talents?Frances: I wouldn't have said so. I think that's because every single day of his life, he was on opium.Henry: I think the argument is a combination of too much opium and also too much magazine work and not enough "real serious" philosophy, big poems, whatever.Frances: I think the best of his work went into Blackwood's, so the magazine work. When he was taken on by Blackwood's, the razor-sharp Edinburgh magazine, then the best of his work took place. I think that had he only written the murder essays, that would have been enough for me, On Murder as a Fine Art.That was enough. I don't need any more of De Quincey. I think Confessions of an English Opium-Eater is also enough in as much as it's the great memoir of addiction. We don't need any more memoirs of addiction, just read that. It's not just a memoir of being addicted to opium. It's about being addicted to what's what. It's about being a super fan and addicted to writing. He was addicted to everything. If he was in AA now, they'd say, apparently, there are 12 addictions, he had all of them. [laughs]Henry: Yes. People talk a lot about parasocial relationships online, where you read someone online or you follow them, and you have this strange idea in your head that you know them in some way, even though they're just this disembodied online person. You sometimes see people say, "Oh, we should understand this more." I think, "Well, read the history of literature, parasocial relationships everywhere."Frances: That's completely true. I hadn't heard that term before. The history of literature, a parasocial relationship. That's your next book.Henry: There we go. I think what I want from De Quincey is more about Shakespeare, because I think the Macbeth essay is superb.Frances: Absolutely brilliant. On Knocking at the Gate in Macbeth.Henry: Yes, and then you think, "Wait, where's the rest of this book? There should be an essay about every play."Frances: That's an absolutely brilliant example of microhistory, isn't it? Just taking a moment in a play, just the knocking at the gate, the morning after the murders, and blowing that moment up, so it becomes the whole play. Oh, my God, it's good. You're right.Henry: It's so good. What is, I think, "important about it", is that in the 20th century, critics started saying or scholars started saying a lot, "We can't just look at the words on the page. We've got to think about the dramaturgy. We've got to really, really think about how it plays out." De Quincey was an absolute master of that. It's really brilliant.Frances: Yes.Henry: What's your favourite modern novel or novelist?Frances: Oh, Hilary Mantel, without doubt, I think. I think we were lucky enough to live alongside a great, great, great novelist. I think the Wolf Hall trilogy is absolutely the greatest piece of narrative fiction that's come out of the 21st century. I also love her. I love her work as an essayist. I love her. She's spooky like Spark. She was inspired.Henry: Yes, she is. Yes.Frances: She learnt a lot of her cunning from Spark, I think. She's written a very spooky memoir. In fact, the only women novelists who acknowledge Spark as their influencer are Ali Smith and Hilary Mantel, although you can see Spark in William Boyd all the time. I think we're pretty lucky to live alongside William Boyd as well. Looking for real, real greatness, I think there's no one to compare with Mantel. Do you agree?Henry: I don't like the third volume of the trilogy.Frances: Okay. Right.Henry: Yes, in general, I do agree. Yes. I think some people don't like historical fiction for a variety of reasons. It may take some time for her to get it. I think she's acknowledged as being really good. I don't know that she's yet acknowledged at the level that you're saying.Frances: Yes.Henry: I think that will take a little bit longer. Maybe as and when there's a biography that will help with that, which I'm sure there will be a biography.Frances: I think they need to wait. I do think it's important to wait for a reputation to settle before starting the biography. Her biography will be very interesting because she married the same man twice. Her growth as a novelist was so extraordinary. Spark, she spent time in Africa. She had this terrible, terrible illness. She knew something. I think what I love about Mantel is, as with Spark, she knew something. She knew something, and she didn't quite know what it was that she knew. She had to write because of this knowledge. When you read her, you know that she's on a different level of understanding.Henry: You specialise in slightly neglected figures of English literature. Who else among the canonical writers deserves a bit more attention?Frances: Oh, that's interesting. I love minor characters. I think Spark was very witty about describing herself as a minor novelist or a writer of minor novels when she was evidently major. She always saw the comedy in being a minor. All the minor writers interest me. Elizabeth Bowen, Henry Green. No, they have heard Elizabeth Bowen has been treated well by Hermione Lee and Henry Green has been treated well by Jeremy Treglown.Why are they not up there yet? They're so much better than most of their contemporaries. I am mystified and fascinated by why it is that the most powerful writers tend to be kicked into the long grass. It's dazzling. When you read a Henry Green novel, you think, "But this is what it's all about. He's understood everything about what the novel can do. Why has no one heard of him?"Henry: I think Elizabeth Bowen's problem is that she's so concise, dense, and well-structured, and everything really plays its part in the pattern of the whole that it's not breezy reading.Frances: No, it's absolutely not.Henry: I think that probably holds her back in some way, even though when I have pushed it on people, most of the time they've said, "Gosh, she's a genius."Frances: Yes.Henry: It's not an easy genius. Whereas Dickens, the pages sort of fly along, something like that.Frances: Yes. One of the really interesting things about Spark is that she really, really is easy reading. At the same time, there's so much freight in those books. There's so much intellectual weight and so many games being played. There's so many books inside the books. Yet you can just read them for the pleasure. You can just read them for the plot. You can read one in an afternoon and think that you've been lost inside a book for 10 years. You don't get that from Elizabeth Bowen. That's true. The novels, you feel the weight, don't you?Henry: Yes.Frances: She's Jamesian. She's more Jamesian, I think, than Spark is.Henry: Something like A World of Love, it requires quite a lot of you.Frances: Yes, it does. Yes, it's not bedtime reading.Henry: No, exactly.Frances: Sitting up in a library.Henry: Yes. Now, you mentioned James. You're a Henry James expert.Frances: I did my PhD on Henry James.Henry: Yes. Will you ever write about him?Frances: I have, actually. Just a little plug. I've just done a selection of James's short stories, three volumes, which are coming out, I think, later this year for Riverrun with a separate introduction for each volume. I think that's all the writing I'm going to do on James. When I was an academic, I did some academic essays on him for collections and things. No, I've never felt, ever, ready to write on James because he's too complicated. I can only take tiny, tiny bits of James and home in on them.Henry: He's a great one for trying to crack the code.Frances: He really is. In fact, I was struck all the way through writing Electric Spark by James's understanding of the comedy of biography, which is described in the figure in the carpet. Remember that wonderful story where there's a writer called Verica who explains to a young critic that none of the critics have understood what his work's about. Everything that's written about him, it's fine, but it's absolutely missed his main point, his beautiful point. He said that in order to understand what the work's about, you have to look for The Figure in the Carpet. It's The Figure in the CarpetIt's the string on which my pearls are strung. A couple of critics become completely obsessed with looking for this Figure in the Carpet. Of course, Spark loved James's short stories. You feel James's short stories playing inside her own short stories. I think that one of the games she left for her biographers was the idea of The Figure in the Carpet. Go on, find it then. Find it. [laughs] The string on which my pearls are strung.Henry: Why did you leave academia? We should say that you did this before it became the thing that everyone's doing.Frances: Is everyone leaving now?Henry: A lot of people are leaving now.Frances: Oh, I didn't know. I was ahead of the curve. I left 20 years ago because I wasn't able to write the books I wanted to write. I left when I'd written two books as an academic. My first was Literary Seductions, and my second was a biography of a blackmailing courtesan called Harriet Wilson, and the book was called The Courtesan's Revenge. My department was sniffy about the books because they were published by Faber and not by OUP, and suggested that somehow I was lowering the tone of the department.This is what things were like 20 years ago. Then I got a contract to write The Ballad of Dorothy Wordsworth, my third book, again with Faber. I didn't want to write the book with my head of department in the back of my mind saying, "Make this into an academic tome and put footnotes in." I decided then that I would leave, and I left very suddenly. Now, I said I'm leaving sort of now, and I've got books to write, and felt completely liberated. Then for The Ballad of Dorothy Wordsworth, I decided not to have footnotes. It's the only book I've ever written without footnotes, simply as a celebration of no longer being in academia.Then the things I loved about being in academia, I loved teaching, and I loved being immersed in literature, but I really couldn't be around colleagues and couldn't be around the ridiculous rules of what was seen as okay. In fact, the university I left, then asked me to come back on a 0.5 basis when they realised that it was now fashionable to have someone who was a trade author. They asked me to come back, which I did not want to do. I wanted to spend days where I didn't see people rather than days where I had to talk to colleagues all the time. I think that academia is very unhappy. The department I was in was incredibly unhappy.Since then, I took up a job very briefly in another English department where I taught creative writing part-time. That was also incredibly unhappy. I don't know whether other French departments or engineering departments are happier places than English departments, but English departments are the most unhappy places I think I've ever seen.[laughter]Henry: What do you admire about the work of George Meredith?Frances: Oh, I love George Meredith. [laughs] Yes. I think Modern Love, his first novel, Modern Love, in a strange sonnet form, where it's not 14 lines, but 16 lines. By the time you get to the bottom two lines, the novel, the sonnet has become hysterical. Modern Love hasn't been properly recognised. It's an account of the breakdown of his marriage. His wife, who was the daughter of the romantic, minor novelist, Thomas Love Peacock. His wife had an affair with the artist who painted the famous Death of Chatterton. Meredith was the model for Chatterton, the dead poet in his purple silks, with his hand falling on the ground. There's a lot of mythology around Meredith.I think, as with Elizabeth Bowen and Henry Green, he's difficult. He's difficult. The other week, I tried to reread Diana of the Crossways, which was a really important novel, and I still love it. I really recognise that it's not an easy read. He doesn't try, in any way, to seduce his readers. They absolutely have to crawl inside each book to sit inside his mind and see the world as he's seeing it.Henry: Can you tell us what you will do next?Frances: At the moment, I'm testing some ideas out. I feel, at the end of every biography, you need a writer. You need to cleanse your palate. Otherwise, there's a danger of writing the same book again. I need this time, I think, to write about, to move century and move genders. I want to go back, I think, to the 19th century. I want to write about a male writer for a moment, and possibly not a novelist as well, because after being immersed in Muriel Sparks' novels, no other novel is going to seem good enough. I'm testing 19th-century men who didn't write novels, and it will probably be a minor character.Henry: Whatever it is, I look forward to reading it. Frances Wilson, thank you very much.Frances: Thank you so much, Henry. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.commonreader.co.uk/subscribe

Full Text of ReadingsFeast of Saint Thomas, Apostle Lectionary: 593The Saint of the day is Saint ThomasSaint Thomas’ Story Poor Thomas! He made one remark and has been branded as “Doubting Thomas” ever since. But if he doubted, he also believed. He made what is certainly the most explicit statement of faith in the New Testament: “My Lord and My God!” and, in so expressing his faith, gave Christians a prayer that will be said till the end of time. He also occasioned a compliment from Jesus to all later Christians: “Have you come to believe because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and have believed” (John 20:29). Thomas should be equally well-known for his courage. Perhaps what he said was impetuous—since he ran, like the rest, at the showdown—but he can scarcely have been insincere when he expressed his willingness to die with Jesus. The occasion was when Jesus proposed to go to Bethany after Lazarus had died. Since Bethany was near Jerusalem, this meant walking into the very midst of his enemies and to almost certain death. Realizing this, Thomas said to the other apostles, “Let us also go to die with him” (John 11:16b). Reflection Thomas shares the lot of Peter the impetuous, James and John, the “sons of thunder,” Philip and his foolish request to see the Father—indeed all the apostles in their weakness and lack of understanding. We must not exaggerate these facts, however, for Christ did not pick worthless men. But their human weakness again points up the fact that holiness is a gift of God, not a human creation; it is given to ordinary men and women with weaknesses; it is God who gradually transforms the weaknesses into the image of Christ, the courageous, trusting, and loving one. Saint Thomas is the Patron Saint of: Architects/Builders/Construction Workers/SurveyorsIndiaPakistanSri LankaTheologians Saint of the Day, Copyright Franciscan Media

Bomberman is a damned retro gaming hero, and I'm ashamed that it took 339 episodes to give that little guy his flowers and show him some love. But we're righting that wrong this week with the Bomberman game I've easily spent the most time with: Bomberman 64.I've never owned a Bomberman game before, but one of my best friends in High School had this one and we played it. My God, how we played it. So many hours of blowing each there up, fighting over alliances, backstabbing, trash talking, and of course, dressing up our Bombermen. One of my all-time favourite multiplayer titles.I didn't really play the single player mode back in the day, but I've spent the past week grinding through that as well. I don't think it holds up nearly as well as the multiplayer, and it reminds me of why I hate this fucking controller so much, but it's far from the worse 64 game I've ever played.I'm rolling solo this week, and I had a great time reliving my childhood and talking Bomberman 64. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.And before we bomb, I put together another edition of the Infamous Intro!This week, we talk about the sense of accomplishment that came with beating a game as a kid, and why modern games just don't seem to hit the same. What's my favourite Mario Kart World track? And do I have any advice for those looking to jump into the world of self-employment?Plus we play another round of 'Play One, Remake One, Erase One', too! This one features 3 N64 multiplayer heavyweights: Super Smash Bros, Goldeneye 007, and WWF No Mercy.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

July 2, 2025 Today's Reading: Luke 9:51-62Daily Lectionary: Joshua 7:1-26; Acts 10:34-48“And Jesus said to him, ‘Leave the dead to bury their own dead. But as for you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God.'” (Luke 9:60)In the Name + of Jesus. Amen. Jesus has set His face toward Jerusalem, fully intent on His procession to Golgotha. The Samaritans refuse to accommodate Jesus and His disciples on account of His unwillingness to take His face from Jerusalem. James and John seek vengeance. This is Jesus, the Christ, the Son of God. How dare some Samaritans deal with Him this way! But Jesus calls no fire and brimstone and instead rebukes them, and they go elsewhere.Still on the road, Jesus encounters three men eager to follow Him. The answers Jesus gives seem harsh, but they serve a point. Jesus was moving and orienting Himself towards Jerusalem—not for political gain or religious zeal, but to walk into Jerusalem to die.This world had no place that could receive Jesus from His purpose in Jerusalem. These three men wanted to follow Jesus for their own gain, and for the sake of following Jesus, the man who does the miracles, speaks with authority, and puts the religious rulers in their place.Jesus is more than just a man; He's the Son of God, who leaves behind His Father, His glory, and any place to rest His head. Jesus leaves it all behind because that's not why He took on our flesh and came into this world. Thanks be to God for that.The disciples James and John show the shallow depth of their discipleship at this point, which, by the time they reach Jerusalem, won't be any better. The 72 will be down to Twelve, but all Twelve will abandon the One. Jesus is the One who leaves the world, fulfills the Law to the will of His Father, and instead of taking what is His, He takes what is rightfully ours—our shame, our sin, our death, and punishment—and takes it up with Him on the cross at Golgotha.On that cursed tree, Jesus, seeing all that He had done, finally breathed His last and laid His head to rest.Jesus presses on toward Jerusalem, toward the cross, where we today rejoice in the cross that leads to the empty tomb. We rejoice that we can find our rest in Him who had no place to rest His head, who gives His body for the feast. It is His very crucified, risen, and ascended body that we are united to in our baptisms.May we all lay down our idols, our pride, and our purposes. May we, by the work of the Holy Spirit, deny ourselves, pick up our cross, and follow Him.In the Name + of Jesus. Amen.Yea, Lord, 'twas Thy rich bounty gave My body, soul, and all I have In this poor life of labor. Lord, grant that I in ev'ry place May glorify Thy lavish grace And help and serve my neighbor. Let no false doctrine me beguile; And Satan not my soul defile. Give strength and patience unto me To bear my cross and follow Thee. Lord Jesus Christ, My God and Lord, my God and Lord, In death Thy comfort still afford. (LSB 708:2)- Justin Chester is a seminary student at Concordia Theological Seminary, Fort Wayne, IN.Audio Reflections Speaker: Pastor Jonathan Lackey is the pastor at Grace Lutheran Church, Vine Grove, KY.In Clarifying the Great Commission, Rev. Daniel Christian Voth identifies common omissions from our collective understanding of Jesus' farewell discourse—omissions that turn Christ's promises of forgiveness, life, and salvation into a legalistic command. Come and discover a richer understanding of The Great Commission.

Dr. Jennifer Wiseman gives expression to our cosmos, as a pioneering astrophysicist, an outspoken advocate for science within policy and the public, as well as a person of faith. Her's are sensibilities of a scientist, a theologian, and a human being in awe of the universe, recognizing that these parts of ourselves need not be in opposition but rather in beautiful and enriching conversation. Origins Podcast WebsiteFlourishing Commons NewsletterShow Notes:Discovery of comet 114P/Wiseman-Skiff (14:30)Maria Mitchell (14:30)Department of Earth, Atmospheric, and Planetary Sciences at MIT (15:40)Jim Elliot (16:00)Needfulness (23:30)the 'lone genius' myth of science (26:00)the Science of Science (29:40)the society of science (30:00)"How Prayer Works" by Kaveh Akbar (30:15)'coworkers in the kingdom of culture' W.E.B. Du Bois (35:00)The Hubble Space Telescope (37:00)Ultra-deep field image (37:00)William James and numinous experiences (37:15)discovery of exoplanets (43:00)"My God, It's Full of Stars" by Tracy K Smith (43:30)what does it mean to flourish? (52:30)lightning round (58:30):Book: A Grief Observedby C.S. Lewis & Life, the Universe and Everythingby Douglas AdamPassion: nature and serendipity Heart sing: the bigger picture, being part of a bigger storya sense of awe and wonder and a sense of hopeJane Hirshfield on OriginsScrewed up: worrying about different things in different stages of lifeI am a Strange Loop by Douglas Hofstadter (01:07:00)Find Jennifer online:At NASAWikipediaLogo artwork by Cristina GonzalezMusic by swelo on all streaming platforms or @swelomusic on social media

The Word of ANGUISH Matthew 27:46, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" This anguishing cry pierces time and eternity. It echoes with a depth of sorrow which no human mind can fully grasp. It was not the physical pain of His torture, nor the mockery of men--but the awful withdrawal of the Father's presence that wrung this cry of torment from the Savior's heart. This was not loss of faith, but the deepest agony of love, deprived of its joy. Never had the Son known such a moment. From all eternity, He had dwelt in perfect fellowship with the Father--one in essence, joy and will. Yet here, at Calvary's apex, Jesus was forsaken. Not as a sinner, for He was sinless. But as our sin-bearer. "God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us" (2 Corinthians 5:21). The absolutely Holy One, stood in the place of vile sinners. The Beloved One became accursed, that the cursed ones might become beloved. In this forsaking, Hell's horror was compressed into a moment--and endured by One Who could not sin and would not turn away. Here we behold the infinite cost of our redemption. Christ endured the wrath of the Father, so that we might have communion with Him. He was abandoned that we might be adopted. He was plunged into darkness so that we could walk in the light of God's favor. Let us tremble at this dreadful picture. Sin is no light thing. It required the cross. Not moral reformations. Not religious rituals. But the wrath-bearing death of the spotless Lamb. If the Father did not spare His own Son when sin was imputed to Him, then how can any presume to escape judgment apart from Jesus? Yet let us also adore. For this cry--as agonizing as it was--marks the very foundation of

"Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit." Luke 23:46 This final utterance from the cross is not one of defeat--but of divine serenity. Having borne the wrath of God and completed the work of our redemption, the Lord Jesus now breathes out a word of rest and trust: "Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit." This is not resignation--it is resolution. Not despair--but deep satisfaction in the will of God. Notice the address: "Father." Though moments earlier He had cried, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?"--now the darkness lifts, and communion is restored. The cry of abandonment, has given way to the voice of fellowship. Christ dies not in fear, but in faith. Not under wrath, but in the embrace of love. The Lord Jesus did not cling to His life; in love for His people, He sacrificed it. Voluntarily. Confidently. Peacefully. He had said earlier, "No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of My own accord" (John 10:18). And now, He lays it down in perfect contentment. He entrusts His spirit to the Father--not into the void, not into oblivion--but into sovereign, loving hands. Here is the death of the believer's Substitute--and the model for every believer's own death. Christ has taken the sting out of death. The grave has lost its victory. For the Christian, death is no longer a leap into darkness, but a Home-going to the Father. The moment the spirit leaves the body, it enters the presence of God. Believer, are you anxious? Do you fear what lies ahead? Learn from your Savior. Live in such communion with God, that you may die as He did--trusting, resting, content. Say daily with faith, "Father, into Your hands I commit my spirit." Not only at death, but in

Oh dear, we’re going to explore the early days of anime film adaptation this week with the awkwardly named The Guyver. To be fair, the later days of anime film adaptation haven’t improved very much, but My God, they really didn’t have a clue what to do with this one. Come and join our discussion … Continue reading "456: The Guyver [1991] Movie Discussion"

Set Apart for Such a Time as This: The End Is Not Yet • Sunday Service To Give: www.ToddCoconato.com/give Website: www.PastorTodd.org Church, we are in a defining moment. The world is rumbling. Headlines scream war and chaos. There's fear in the air, confusion in the Church, and deception in the culture. But let me speak this over you prophetically: The end is not yet. We are not in World War III. We are not in the Tribulation. What we are in, is a season of separation. God is once again calling a remnant to rise. Not a popular people—but a set-apart people. Not those caught in the tides of the world, but those rooted in the Spirit of the Living God. We are entering a new phase—a time where deep trust in the Lord will be non-negotiable. His presence must be our oxygen. His Word must be our compass. And yes, this will require sacrifice. Some relationships won't come with us. Some comforts will have to die. But His glory is worth it.   1. Matthew 24:6–8 (NKJV) “And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilences, and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of sorrows.” 2. Hebrews 12:26–27 (NKJV) “…yet once more I shake not only the earth, but also heaven. Now this, ‘Yet once more,' indicates the removal of those things that are being shaken, as of things that are made, that the things which cannot be shaken may remain.” 3. 2 Timothy 3:1–5 (NKJV) “But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!” 4. 1 Peter 2:9 (NKJV) “But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” 5. Romans 12:1–2 (NKJV) “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” 6. Psalm 91:1–2 (NKJV) “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.'” 7. 2 Corinthians 6:17–18 (NKJV) “Therefore ‘Come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you.' ‘I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.'” 8. Isaiah 60:1–2 (NKJV) “Arise, shine; for your light has come! And the glory of the Lord is risen upon you. For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth, and deep darkness the people; but the Lord will arise over you, and His glory will be seen upon you.” 9. Proverbs 3:5–6 (NKJV) “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” 10. John 15:19 (NKJV) “If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” We are not in World War III. We are in a spiritual crossroad. The end is not yet. But the separation has begun.  • God is separating wheat from tares.  • He's calling His remnant to the secret place.  • He's asking for trust, sacrifice, and obedience.  • Some relationships won't survive this season. That's okay.  • What matters is your alignment with the Spirit. CCLI: 21943673 Be the remnant.

This episode originally broadcast on June 12, 2025. The original podcast post is here: https://pixelatedgeek.com/2025/06/binary-system-podcast-460-wtnv-269-a-story-about-me-love-death-robots-station-eleven-and-star-trek-lower-decks/"My GOD the way this show delivers information…"We've got a lot to cover this week, starting with what's quickly becoming our favorite kind of Night Vale episode: a Steve Carlsberg story! (Seriously, ten years ago we loved to hate him as much as Cecil did, now we think he's practically the heart of Night Vale, how did that happen?)After that we do a quick recap of the Love Death + Robots episode "Smart Appliances, Stupid Owners." (Short version: it's fine. It's very short, and very silly. Also "Creature Comforts" did it better. But we loved the voices.)Then we jump into episode 2 of Station Eleven, which doesn't end up being a very long recap because there's mostly just ONE SCENE we want to talk about. If you watched it, you know which one we mean. The bit with the text messages. Yiiikes.Finally we wrap up with two episodes of Star Trek Lower Decks: the one where the Betazoids are making everybody go crazy OR ARE THEY, and the one where Tendi goes to her sister's pirate wedding. (Tendi being a reluctant badass will never stop being the absolute best.)This week's outro is a clip from Sunset Beach by Pro Tunes.Here's Kathryn's fan art of Laura (the waitress with branches growing out of her).You can find out more about the Dark Planet Of Awesome Size on the Night Vale Wiki.Looking for a present for that hard-to-shop-for person? Want to buy them (or yourself) a square foot of a castle in Scotland? Look no further! You can support the restoration of Dunan's castle, legally call yourself Lady or Laird, AND if you use this link to get there, you can support this podcast too! ScottishLaird.co.uk.For updates, fan art, and other randomness, come follow us on Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, and Instagram!

Mini: Let's review Daniel and the Lion's Den with the songs: "Bubbles", "Whisper a Prayer", Tis So Sweet" and our memory verse Dan.6:22 "My God sent his angel and shut the lion's mouth." Recorded and produced by: Ashley B. Larson Don't forget to check out the coloring pages that go along with each lesson! https://startingwithjesus.com/spb-cp/ If you have enjoyed this program and would like to know more, go to our website: www.startingwithjesus.com The Bible and nature story material used in today's devotional podcast has been used with permission from My Bible First. If you would like your own copy, please visit their website-or call 1-877-242-5317. If you would like to purchase your own Memory Verse CD or Songbook, go to Ouachita Hills Store (https://www.ouachitahillsacademy.org/store?page=1&store_category_id=0&sort_by=title&is_ascending=1&search=). Songs from: Little Voices Praise Him, SDA Hymnal, Sabbath Songs For Tiny Tots, New Sabbath Songs For Tiny Tots, Memory Verse Verse Songs for Cradle Roll, Children's Songs For Jesus, and Scripture Songs and Little Lessons All Bible verses are from the NKJV. Singers for this Quarter: Tory, Caleb, and Enoch Hall, Hudson Reeves, Michael and Amy Nelson Editing assist: Dillon Austin and Josh Larson Music Recording and Editing: Rachel Nelson and Kristy Hall Coloring Pages: Rachel Lamming, Lily Canada, and Evie Rodriguez Theme Music: Lindsey Mills- www.lindseymillsmusic.com  God: who gives talents for us to use for Him

Rawrr! Prayer is good, right? But what happens when someone makes it against the law to pray?!?! Find out in this great episode!Prayer is talking to GodDaniel would continuously talk to God through prayer. Even when he was threatened to be thrown into the lion's den, Daniel would continue to pray to God.Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart.– Colossians 4:2Daniel 2, Daniel 6Daniel and the Lion's DenDaniel was a very good, faithful man, who always obeyed God. He would pray to God consistently, three times a day. Daniel had a very close relationship to God due to how often he would talk to God through prayer and because of his unshakable faith. God also gave Daniel an incredible gift—Daniel was able to interpret dreams. This gift led Daniel to successfully interpreted King Nebuchadnezzar's dream. The king then gave Daniel a high up position in the kingdom and gave him many gifts. Because Daniel was so smart, other wise men in the kingdom were very jealous. Their jealousy led them to convince King Darius to make a new law—that the people were only allowed to pray to the king. If people chose not to obey this law, they would be thrown in the lion's den. These jealous men knew that Daniel would never obey this law since he would pray to God several times a day.Daniel continued to pray in his room, even when he had heard about this new law. After the jealous men saw him do this, they told King Darius. This made King very upset because he cared for Daniel and tried to get him out of trouble, but knew there was no way around it. Before throwing him in the den, King Darius told Daniel “Your God, to whom you are so loyal, is going to get you out of this.” The next morning, King Darius went to check on Daniel and heard Daniel say “My God sent his angel to shut the lion's mouths so that they would not hurt me, for I have been found innocent in his sight. And I have wronged you, Your majesty.” Daniel had not been harmed! They both knew that Daniel was protected because he had completely trusted God and had faith in Him. Daniel had a great amount of love for the Lord. Daniel also had a deep and personal connection to God because he would intentionally talk to God all the time through prayer. Regardless of the situation he was facing, he would make time to pray. Sometimes, we can get so caught up in our daily routine, that we neglect to prioritize our quiet time with God. But the truth is, God wants to hear from us—He wants us to talk to Him because of His love for each and every one of us.I can talk to God. Questions to think about:1. Why did Daniel continue to pray, even when he knew his life would be threatened?2. Why did Daniel have such a close relationship with God?3. How can I remember to talk to God on a daily basis?

Welcome to Inside the Epicenter with Joel and Lynn Rosenberg. In this episode, Joel discusses President Donald Trump's momentous decision to send U.S. B-2 bombers to attack Iran’s nuclear facilities—a action poised to change the Middle East dramatically. Joined by military affairs expert and former Jerusalem Post Editor-in-Chief Yaakov Katz, Joel explores the details of the incident, its significance, and the urgent consequences for Israel, Iran, and the global community. The episode looks into the leadership behind these choices, what may follow, and how Christians can pray and assist those in need as events unfold swiftly. If you are looking for timely insight, in-depth analysis, and a spiritual perspective during this pivotal moment, this episode is a must-listen. (00:00) "Trump Bombs Iran: Global Shockwaves"(03:33) U.S. Bombs Iran's Nuclear Sites(10:19) "Psalm 91: Divine Protection"(12:07) "Historic US-Israel Night Unpacked"(15:58) Jerusalem Quiet Before Attack Chaos(19:25) "America First: Israel Policy Controversy"(23:33) Reevaluating Israeli Strength and Sympathy(25:33) "Evangelicals Oppose Iran's Nuclear Threat"(28:51) Netanyahu's Strategic Shift(32:29) "Trump's Iran Policy Dilemma"(49:52) Israeli Military Success and Divine Aid(52:54) "Alaska Cruise Full: No Seats" Learn more about The Joshua Fund: JoshuaFund.comMake a tax-deductible donation: Donate | The Joshua FundStock Media provided by DimmySad / Pond5 Verse of the Day: Psalm 91:1-5 (NASB)- He who dwells in the shelter of the Most HighWill abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,My God, in whom I trust!” For it is He who delivers you from the snare of the trapperAnd from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions, and under His wings you may seek refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark. You will not be afraid of the terror by night, or of the arrow that flies by day; Pray for peace, pray for total victory over the Iranian regime, and pray for protection from these missile and drone attacks from Iran, and that Israel could defeat and destroy all of those missiles and drones so we don't have to shoot them out of the sky. Links for Reference Netanyahu bet big and brought the US-Israel alliance to a whole new level - analysis https://www.jpost.com/israel-news/defense-news/article-858506 AFTER DESTROYING IRAN NUCLEAR THREAT, PRESIDENT TRUMP ADDRESSES NATION, PRAISES ISRAEL, WARNS MULLAHS, THANKS GOD https://allisraelnews.com/after-destroying-iran-nuclear-threat-trump-addresses-nation-warns-mullahs-thanks-god TRUMP BOMBS IRAN – ISRAEL ON HIGH ALERT – PLEASE PRAYhttps://allisraelnews.com/breaking-news-trump-bombs-iran-israel-on-high-alert Your bold decision will change history’: Israeli politicians across the spectrum thank President Trump after US strikes. https://allisraelnews.com/your-bold-decision-will-change-history-israeli-politicians-across-the-spectrum-thank-president-trump-after-the-us-strikes Iran threatens closure of strategic Hormuz Straits | After 'obliterating' nuclear program, US says it seeks peace with Iran | Russia condemns US strikes https://allisraelnews.com/operation-rising-lion-live-updates-june-22-2025 Related Episodes: SPECIAL EPISODE: Fmr VP Mike Pence "Trump & Israel must FINISH THE JOB of crushing Iran" #294Israel at War: Urgent Updates and The Humanitarian Response in the Epicenter #293Special Episode - Wartime Update: Inside Israel’s Defining Conflict with Iran #292Special Episode - ATTACK: Israel launches massive strikes on Iran’s nuclear program #291 Donate a generous monthly gift to The Joshua Fund to bless Israel and Her Neighbors now and for the long haul. Become an Epicenter Ally today! Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Psalm 89,I will sing of the steadfast love of the Lord, forever; with my mouth I will make known your faithfulness to all generations.2 For I said, “Steadfast love will be built up forever; in the heavens you will establish your faithfulness.”3 You have said, “I have made a covenant with my chosen one; I have sworn to David my servant:4 ‘I will establish your offspring forever, and build your throne for all generations.'” Selah5 Let the heavens praise your wonders, O Lord, your faithfulness in the assembly of the holy ones!6 For who in the skies can be compared to the Lord? Who among the heavenly beings is like the Lord,7 a God greatly to be feared in the council of the holy ones, and awesome above all who are around him?8 O Lord God of hosts, who is mighty as you are, O Lord, with your faithfulness all around you?9 You rule the raging of the sea; when its waves rise, you still them.10 You crushed Rahab like a carcass; you scattered your enemies with your mighty arm.11 The heavens are yours; the earth also is yours; the world and all that is in it, you have founded them.12 The north and the south, you have created them; Tabor and Hermon joyously praise your name.13 You have a mighty arm; strong is your hand, high your right hand.14 Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; steadfast love and faithfulness go before you.15 Blessed are the people who know the festal shout, who walk, O Lord, in the light of your face,16 who exult in your name all the day and in your righteousness are exalted.17 For you are the glory of their strength; by your favor our horn is exalted.18 For our shield belongs to the Lord, our king to the Holy One of Israel.19 Of old you spoke in a vision to your godly one, and said: “I have granted help to one who is mighty; I have exalted one chosen from the people.20 I have found David, my servant; with my holy oil I have anointed him,21 so that my hand shall be established with him; my arm also shall strengthen him.22 The enemy shall not outwit him; the wicked shall not humble him.23 I will crush his foes before him and strike down those who hate him.24 My faithfulness and my steadfast love shall be with him, and in my name shall his horn be exalted.25 I will set his hand on the sea and his right hand on the rivers.26 He shall cry to me, ‘You are my Father, my God, and the Rock of my salvation.'27 And I will make him the firstborn, the highest of the kings of the earth.28 My steadfast love I will keep for him forever, and my covenant will stand firm for him.29 I will establish his offspring forever and his throne as the days of the heavens.30 If his children forsake my law and do not walk according to my rules,31 if they violate my statutes and do not keep my commandments,32 then I will punish their transgression with the rod and their iniquity with stripes,33 but I will not remove from him my steadfast love or be false to my faithfulness.34 I will not violate my covenant or alter the word that went forth from my lips.35 Once for all I have sworn by my holiness; I will not lie to David.36 His offspring shall endure forever, his throne as long as the sun before me.37 Like the moon it shall be established forever, a faithful witness in the skies.” Selah38 But now you have cast off and rejected; you are full of wrath against your anointed.39 You have renounced the covenant with your servant; you have defiled his crown in the dust.40 You have breached all his walls; you have laid his strongholds in ruins.41 All who pass by plunder him; he has become the scorn of his neighbors.42 You have exalted the right hand of his foes; you have made all his enemies rejoice.43 You have also turned back the edge of his sword, and you have not made him stand in battle.44 You have made his splendor to cease and cast his throne to the ground.45 You have cut short the days of his youth; you have covered him with shame. Selah46 How long, O Lord? Will you hide yourself forever? How long will your wrath burn like fire?47 Remember how short my time is! For what vanity you have created all the children of man!48 What man can live and never see death? Who can deliver his soul from the power of Sheol? Selah49 Lord, where is your steadfast love of old, which by your faithfulness you swore to David?50 Remember, O Lord, how your servants are mocked, and how I bear in my heart the insults[f] of all the many nations,51 with which your enemies mock, O Lord, with which they mock the footsteps of your anointed.52 Blessed be the Lord forever!Amen and Amen.Structure and SummaryThis psalm is the final psalm in Book Three of the Psalms. The first two books are mainly written by David, while the third book has psalms primarily written by Asaph and emphasizes holy worship. Nevertheless, this final psalm focuses on God's covenant with David.The psalm is arranged into five sections: two small sections at the beginning and end, and three larger sections in the middle. The first section (v. 1-4) introduces the twin themes: God's character and his covenant with David. In this psalm, his character is defined by his steadfast love and his faithfulness, both of which appear seven times in the psalm. Both of these words describe God's character, but they are particularly applied in terms of his covenant with David — the promise that the seed of David will sit on an everlasting throne (v. 3-4). Notice the verbs in 2-4: steadfast love will be built up forever; and David's throne will be built forever. God's faithfulness is established in the heavens; David's offspring will be established forever. And this is crucial: the psalmist says he will sing of God's steadfast love and faithfulness forever.The psalmist then celebrates God's majesty, might, and saving power (v. 5-16). God is incomparable; there is no one like him. He sits enthroned among his heavenly council, but he is supreme over all of them.All of creation belongs to God. He is the Almighty Maker of Heaven and Earth. His dominion is from north to south, and east to west, from the highest heavens to the seas to the land. He is all-powerful, with a strong right hand and mighty arm. But he's not merely a tower of power, like the false god of Islam. His power is directed by his holy character. Righteousness and justice are the foundation of his throne, and his steadfast love and faithfulness go before him, radiating from his presence (v. 14). But God isn't simply unique among the heavenly beings; nor does he simply rule the heavens and the earth from his throne. He also crushes his enemies. In this passage, Rahab is not a reference to the prostitute from Jericho. Instead it's a reference to a dragon-demon associated with Egypt (Psalm 87:4; Isa 30:7). Crushing Rahab is linked to ruling and stilling the sea, just as God crushed the king of Egypt beneath a wall of water. Job 26:12,“By his power he stilled the sea; by his understanding he shattered Rahab.”Isaiah 51:9,“Awake, awake, put on strength, O arm of the LORD; awake, as in days of old, the generations of long ago. Was it not you who cut Rahab in pieces, who pierced the dragon?”This is a celebration of God's majesty, might, and saving power, and the people who belong to God and join this celebration and walk in the light of his face are blessed (v. 15-16). God is the glory and beauty of his people's strength (v. 17). Then the psalmist brings God's majesty to earth and links it to his covenant promises to David. Israel's king is Israel's shield (v. 18), and God is the one who found, helped, anointed, and exalted (v. 19-20). God's mighty hand and arm? They establish and strengthen David (v. 21). Just as God tore Rahab apart, so will the Davidic king outwit and beat down his enemies (v. 23). God's steadfast love and faithfulness will be with David (v. 24), and David will call upon God as Father, and God will make him his firstborn, the king of kings (v.26-27), and he will establish David's offspring on an everlasting throne (v. 28-29).God's covenant with David and his sons will endure, even if and when David's sons break God's law. Discipline? Yes. Rod? Yes? Rejection? No. Why? Because of God's steadfast love and faithfulness (v. 33). God's character has established this covenant with an oath (v. 34-35), and David's offspring and throne will endure as long as the sun, moon, and stars — faithful witnesses in the sky (v. 36-37).Then we have the turn. Verse 38 introduces a contrast. For the next ten verses, God's steadfast love and faithfulness are completely absent. Instead, we see a rejected son (v.28), a renounced covenant, a defiled crown (v. 39), breached walls, ruined fortresses (v. 40), plundered cities (v. 41), triumphant foes, rejoicing enemies (v. 42), a throne in the dust, and shame, scorn, and reproach in every direction (v. 41, 45). God's wrath has come upon the people because the king, David's son, has rebelled against God. And so the psalmist is confused. In light of God's character and covenant, how can this be? How long will it last (v. 46)? If God's character and covenant fail, then everything is futile, vain, and worthless (v. 47). Will the psalmist see God's saving power before he dies, because no one escapes the power of Sheol (v. 48)?The final section is an appeal to God's steadfast love and his faithfulness to David, in light of the mocking reproach of the nations (v. 50-51). The psalmist asks where God's covenant love has gone, begs him to remember his promise, and concludes with a triumphant hope: Blessed be the Lord forever (v. 52). Read Your Story in Light of the StoryOne of the great values of regular Bible reading is knowing what story you're a part of, and being able to read your life in light of it. This psalm is filled with echoes and allusions to the big events of Israel's history. Listen to these passages:The revelation of God's name, glory, and goodness to Moses in Exodus 34:6,“The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, 7 keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children's children, to the third and the fourth generation.”In this psalm, the psalmist emphasizes God's oath (v. 3, 35, 49) and covenant (v. 3, 28, 34) three times each. Hebrews 6:13-20 tells us that when God wants to convincingly and abundantly show the unchangeable character of his promise, he swears by himself, like he does to Abraham after the sacrifice of Isaac (Gen. 22:16-18, which Moses appeals to at the Golden Calf episode in Exodus 32:13), or in Isaiah 45:23, when God swears by himself that every knee will bow and every tongue swear allegiance to him as the only righteous God and Savior, or in Amos 4:2 when God swears by his holiness that he will bring judgment on the pride, idolatry, and oppression of Israel's leaders.Genesis 22:16-18,“By myself I have sworn, declares the LORD, because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, 17 I will surely bless you, and I will surely multiply your offspring as the stars of heaven and as the sand that is on the seashore. And your offspring shall possess the gate of his enemies, 18 and in your offspring shall all the nations of the earth be blessed, because you have obeyed my voice.”Exodus 32:13,“Remember Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, your servants, to whom you swore by your own self, and said to them, ‘I will multiply your offspring as the stars of heaven, and all this land that I have promised I will give to your offspring, and they shall inherit it forever.'”Isaiah 45:22-23,“Turn to me and be saved, all the ends of the earth! For I am God, and there is no other. By myself I have sworn; from my mouth has gone out in righteousness a word that shall not return: ‘To me every knee shall bow, every tongue shall swear allegiance.'”Amos 4:2,“The Lord GOD has sworn by his holiness that, behold, the days are coming upon you, when they shall take you away with hooks, even the last of you with fishhooks.”The psalm draws heavily on the promise to David in 2 Samuel 7:When your days are fulfilled and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. 13 He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever (89:4, 29, 36). 14 I will be to him a father, and he shall be to me a son (89:26). When he commits iniquity, I will discipline him with the rod of men, with the stripes of the sons of men (89:30-32), 15 but my steadfast love will not depart from him (89:33-34), as I took it from Saul, whom I put away from before you. 16 And your house and your kingdom shall be made sure forever before me. Your throne shall be established forever.' (vv. 12-16)In order to lay the groundwork for the key fight of faith, the psalmist pulls together these biblical themes:God's name and characterGod's oath by which he swears by himselfThe covenant God made with DavidWhat Is Real?This is the real question. The gap in this psalm is between what the psalmist knows of God's character and covenant on the one hand, and the circumstances at the present moment. Who God is (steadfast love and faithfulness) and what God has said (oath and covenant to David) seem out of accord with the reality before him (judgment, wrath, and a crown in the dust). That is the question for all of us when the world seems confusing, futile, and vain. Do we interpret our circumstances in light of God's character and covenant? Or do we abandon God's character and covenant in the face of our circumstances?God has promised the nations to Christ as his inheritance (Psalm 2:8; Matthew 28:12-20). And then we look at the state of the world, and the state of our nation, and see the rampant apostasy, rebellion, and decay around us. What's more real? God's character and covenant? Or sexual deviancy, political corruption, and widespread evangelical apathy and compromise? When you see the crown in the dust, when the walls are breached and the cities are burning and the enemies of God and his people are rejoicing — do you pray like this? How long, O Lord?At present, we don't see everything subjected to him, but we see Jesus, crowned with glory and honor because of the suffering of death.When your kids wander, or when they get a case of the wobbles: what's more real? God's character and covenant? Or the wobbles and wandering? How do you pray? Do you bless God in confidence that he will hear and answer? Do you still sing of the steadfast love of the Lord? Does your mouth still make known his faithfulness to future generations?Or maybe it's your own faith and holiness. Your own remaining sin frustrates you, and you wonder what to make of all of those promises — that God will sanctify you and make you holy, that he will put your sin to death and deliver you from the domain of darkness. When you see your abiding anger and envy, your drunkenness and lust, your anxiety and fear of man, your worldliness and selfishness, you feel the confusion and vanity. What is more real to you? Do you still sing of the steadfast love of the Lord?This is not hypocrisy; it's what a living faith does when confronted with the vanity of man and the discipline of God. Faith honestly confronts the facts on the ground, and then appeals to God's character and his covenant. And maybe there is a lesson for us in the proportions of the psalm. 70% of the psalm (37/52 verses) is devoted to rehearsing and celebrating God's character and covenant, his steadfast love and faithfulness.20% of the psalm (11/52 verses) confronts the current facts on the ground.The last 10% (4/52 verses) offers a simple prayer for God to remember his covenant and character, along with a concluding declaration of praise (“Blessed be the Lord, forever!”).How much of your mental attention is devoted to rooting yourself in God's steadfast love and faithfulness, in rehearsing his mighty deeds and covenant promises, and how much is spent fixating on the breached walls, triumphant enemies, and reproaching shame?In other words, the confusion is real and the situation is hard and ugly, but he lands on the oath, on the covenant, on God's character, and makes good on his opening promise: “I will sing of the steadfast love of the Lord forever…” (even when the city is burning and the crown is in the dust).Christ's CrownChrist is the offspring of David. He crushed the dragon's head. He stilled the waves. He was strengthened by God's grace. His enemies did not outwit him. The wicked did not humble him. God anointed him with his Spirit, and established and exalted him above the angels and the powers. But Christ himself faced God's rejection and absence.“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”His crown was defiled in the dust. His days were cut short, and he was covered in shame. But Christ bridged the gap between God's character and covenant, and the rejection and crown in the dust. In his darkest moments, he called upon God as Father (89:26). In Gethsemane: “My Father, if possible, let this cup pass from me…My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done” (Matthew 26:39-42).At Calvary, when with a crown of thorns, mocked and reproached as his enemies rejoiced:“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do…Father, into your hands I commit my spirit” (Luke 23:34, 46). The psalmist's question that haunts the psalm: What man can live and never see death? Who can deliver his soul from the power of Sheol? Christ saw death…and he swallowed it whole. He crushed both Death and the Dragon. Where is the steadfast love of the Lord? Where is his faithfulness that he swore to David? It's on a Roman cross. It's exalted at God's right hand, seated above every angelic and demonic power, ruling over heaven and earth, as God puts all of his enemies under his feet. That's why in Revelation 1:5, Christ is introduced with distinctive language from Psalm 89 as “the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of the kings on earth.”And his oath and covenant are sealed in blood. He swore by his holiness. He swore by his faithfulness. And that faithfulness is yours.His oath, his covenant, his bloodsupport me in the whelming flood.When all around my soul gives way,he then is all my hope and stay.

We are wrapping up, or beginning to, our signature episode; in this installment, we start with David's description in Psalm 22 of the crucifixion of Jesus.Beginning with the most historic moment, both great joy for us and agony for our Savior,"My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?" Psalm 22:1aThe spiritual separation of Jesus, his pain, and humiliation are also described in Psalm 22. What did Jesus do in anticipation of this excruciating pain?He sought the Father, gathered His friends, and prayed."And He went a little beyond them, and fell on His face and prayed, saying, "My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as Thou wilt." Matthew 26:39We apply this in various and sundry ways: "The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak." However, it is key to note that we hear that phrase from our Savior in the context of prayer!Our So What?Our duty, glory, excellency, and abundant life flow directly from our communion with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.Brethren, let us pray for one another to overcome the weakness of the flesh through prayer. "What a man is on his knees before God, that he is and nothing more." Robert Murray M'Cheynee Donation link:https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=G9JGGR5W97D64Or go to www.freerangepreacheronprayer.com and use the Donations tab.Assistant Editor: Seven Jefferson Gossard.www.freerangepreacheronprayer.comfreerangeprayer@gmail.comFacebook - Free Range Preacher MinistriesInstagram: freerangeministriesAll our Scripture quotes are drawn from the NASB 1977 edition.For access to the Voice Over services of Richard Durrington, please visit RichardDurrington.com or email him at Durringtonr@gmail.comOur podcast art was designed by @sammmmmmmmm23 InstagramSeason 007Episode 055

Habakkuk 1:13, "You are of purer eyes than to behold evil; You cannot look on wickedness." Psalm 5:4–5, "You are not a God who takes pleasure in evil; with You the wicked cannot dwell. The arrogant cannot stand in Your presence; You hate all who do wrong." If we would know how God views sin, we must not measure it by how lightheartedly man treats it, nor by how common it appears in the world, nor even by how it wounds our own conscience. No. We must measure sin by the cross. Sin is not merely a mistake, a weakness, or an unfortunate choice. It is a direct offense against the holiness of the eternal God. Sin is a daring defiance of His Word, a trampling upon His glory, and a mockery of His authority. But if we would truly understand the infinite evil of sin, we must look to Calvary. There, on the accursed tree, God unveiled His view of sin. He did not even spare His own beloved Son, when He stood in the sinner's place. What horror must belong to sin, when its payment required the abandonment of the sinless One by His own Father? What dreadful weight must sin carry, that it could crush the eternal Son of God into the dust of death? What must God think of sin, when He would lay upon Jesus the iniquity of His people, and exact from Him every drop of wrath which our guilt deserved? Behold the bloodied brow, the pierced hands, the parched lips, the darkened sky, the cry of dereliction: "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me!" These are God's thunderous declarations that sin is no trifle. Sin is not something He can simply overlook. Sin is a monster so vile, that it demanded nothing less than the sacrifice of the Lamb of God. Here is a sight too deep for words: the infinit

Alan Sparhawk is a singer, songwriter and a founding member of the Duluth based band Low, where he has built decades of stirring music with his wife and lifelong creative partner Mimi Parker. Following Mimi's passing in 2022, Alan has released two solo records, the first titled White Flowers, My God and the most recent Alan Sparhawk with Trampled By Turtles, both available now via Sub Pop Records. Alan shares his experiences from the most recent tour, what almost destroyed him, how he deals with it and why he thinks it's healthy to have near breaking points on the road. He tells us how his pitch corrected vocals style on White Flowers, My God was both a cathartic and perspective changing experience. We learn how he came to collaborate with fellow Duluthians Trampled By Turtles and why the relationship has provided personal and performance confidence he was seeking. Joe and Alan discuss the playful vocal phrasing on the song Stranger, why Alan rarely plays acoustic guitar and origin of Alans funk band Derecho Rhythm Section. Alan Sparhawk Sub Pop ⁠ Tour Stories is now supported by @tandemdrums, maker of Drops drum mutes.  Joe's absolute favorite drummute for live, rehearsal and the studio. visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tandem Drums⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Please visit and support ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Izotope⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Distrokid⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for continued exclusive listener discounts. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Izotope⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is the leader in audio repair, mixing and mastering. Ruinous uses ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Izotope⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and you should too. Trust us. The best way to get your music into the worlds ears is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Distrokid⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Artist keep 100% of their royalties and their mobile app is smartly designed, easy to use and perfectly intuitive.

My God, have you any decency at all?! World's Finest Gita Jackson and All-Star Alex Jaffe come to terms with issue 41, and process the Silver Wheel of Nyorlath, Starfire's whole deal, and the exact ways you can and can't rip off Alan Moore. Show Notes: 52 Geoff Johns Grant Morrison Greg Rucka Mark Waid Keith Giffen Superman New Superman trailer Lois Lane Rachel Brosnahan Popular Front Lex Luthor Skins Nicholas Hoult Jack O'Connell Sinners (2025) The Great Metamorpho NoHo Hank Ayo Edebiri 1: Let's Talk Talent (04:34) Giuseppe Camuncoli Swamp Thing Hellblazer Amazing Spider-Man Superior Spider-Man Star Wars: Darth Vader The Other History of the DC Universe Batman: Europa Undiscovered Country Scott Snyder Rodney Ramos Alex Sinclair Renee Montoya Adam Strange Ralph Dibny Animal Man Wonder Woman Infinite Crisis Wonder Woman: Amazons Attack Granny Goodness Hippolyta 2: Let's Talk About 52 #41 (08:32) Starfire Lady Styx Nanda Parbat Isis Vic Sage Andor Richard Dragon T. O. Morrow Professor Milo Batman Batman: the Animated Series Catwoman Arkham Asylum The Shark Arkham Asylum: Living Hell Dan Slott Superman Unlimited Silver Wheel of Nyorlath Alan Moore Felix Faust Rama Kushna Helm of Fate Identity Crisis Gotham Central Maxwell Lord Green Lantern Corps Mogo Rot Lop Fan 3: The Backup (29:44) Teen Titans Teen Titans (TV series) Megan Thee Stallion Harley Quinn The Joker Raven Cyborg Iris Chacón Titans Pennyworth Epix V For Vendetta 4: What's your favorite part of the issue? (34:18) Leverage 5: The Blackboard (35:40) Lobo Watchmen Peter Cannon, Thunderbolt Promethea Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow? John Constantine Batman: The Dark Knight Returns Green Lantern the Animated Series Blue Lantern Corps Green Lantern: Emerald Knights The Animatrix Nathan Fillion Rowdy Roddy Piper 6: Asking The Questions at 52mailbag@gmail.com (42:08) Amalgam Comics Spider-Man Noir Gambit Brian Michael Bendis Jessica Jones Emma Frost Black Cat 7: Crackship Crisis (45:07) 52 Pickup is an Aftermath production, created by Gita Jackson and Alex Jaffe, and edited by Esper Quinn, with original music by Jon Ehrens. Hosting for 52 Pickup is provided by Insert Credit. If you'd like to follow along, you can check out 52 at your local comic book store or library, or the DC Universe Infinite subscription service. The views and opinions expressed on this show are solely those of the show's personalities, and do not reflect those of DC Entertainment or Warner Bros. Please rate and review our show wherever you can, and send your questions and comments to 52mailbag@gmail.com. Never stop reading comics.

Romans 1:7-15 — Conversion is not the end of the Christian journey; it's the beginning. The apostle Paul was aware of this and longed to visit the Christians in Rome so that he might strengthen them. In this sermon titled “My God, Through Jesus Christ” from Romans 1:7–15, Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones displays the apostle Paul's love for others which stems from his confidence in the Lord Jesus Christ. Filled with the Spirit, Paul's passion is clearly seen as he thinks of others, prays for them, and seeks to visit them. Among many Christians today, the primary concern is for oneself. A person talks about their own personal journey toward God. It's not uncommon to hear a Christian declare, “I'm just focusing on myself right now.” But is this the way of Christ? Through Jesus, Christians have confidence before God. Christians are no longer simply “seeking God,” but rather seeking to love others through the assurance they have found in Jesus Christ. Listen in as Dr. Lloyd-Jones demonstrates how the gospel motivated Paul, not only with the desire to visit and strengthen others, but to pray for them. As Paul comes to God in prayer, he comes through the one in whom he has such confidence: the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus is the way of salvation and the Christian desires all others to be built up in Him.

Romans 1:7-15 — Conversion is not the end of the Christian journey; it's the beginning. The apostle Paul was aware of this and longed to visit the Christians in Rome so that he might strengthen them. In this sermon titled “My God, Through Jesus Christ” from Romans 1:7–15, Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones displays the apostle Paul's love for others which stems from his confidence in the Lord Jesus Christ. Filled with the Spirit, Paul's passion is clearly seen as he thinks of others, prays for them, and seeks to visit them. Among many Christians today, the primary concern is for oneself. A person talks about their own personal journey toward God. It's not uncommon to hear a Christian declare, “I'm just focusing on myself right now.” But is this the way of Christ? Through Jesus, Christians have confidence before God. Christians are no longer simply “seeking God,” but rather seeking to love others through the assurance they have found in Jesus Christ. Listen in as Dr. Lloyd-Jones demonstrates how the gospel motivated Paul, not only with the desire to visit and strengthen others, but to pray for them. As Paul comes to God in prayer, he comes through the one in whom he has such confidence: the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus is the way of salvation and the Christian desires all others to be built up in Him. To support this ministry financially, visit: https://www.oneplace.com/donate/603/29

Billy Graham- One of the MOST POWERFUL Videos You'll Ever Watch. Quentin L. Cook, D. Todd Christofferson. ACU Sunday Series.   Billy Graham | One of the MOST POWERFUL Videos You'll Ever Watch - Inspirational Video BILLY GRAHAM | The Speech That Will Change Your Life Forever - Inspirational & Motivational Video Faith Over Fear: Walking the Path of Peace | Elder Quentin L. Cook It's Not Too Late to Repent, But Don't Procrastinate | Elder D. Todd Christofferson Chior Song- Nearer, My God, to Thee. Take a look at the kind of young men Christianity produces- Watch this video at- https://youtu.be/PKsr49csFYk?si=Xp5PEQuSLcJGVnwx   Billy Graham | One of the MOST POWERFUL Videos You'll Ever Watch - Inspirational Video Watch this video at- https://youtu.be/zHPaFDRZMUo?si=rHuiBCPL17_FryUv ABOVE INSPIRATION 2.8M subscribers 4,129,453 views Jun 26, 2019 #encourage #God #Jesus God is unchanging today and forever. God's love is unchanging. He'll never love you any less than he does right now. God's plan of salvation will never change. It is solely through the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. Repentant sinners are saved by grace through faith. ✩ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL ✩ ✭ SHOP: https://aboveinspiration.myspreadshop... ✭ JOIN: https://youtube.com/aboveinspiration/... ✭ DONATE: https://bit.ly/2IS5rgs ✩ FOLLOW US ✩ ✭ FACEBOOK:   / aboveinspiration   ✭ INSTAGRAM:   / above_inspiration   ✭ TWITTER:   / above_inspire   ✭ WEBSITE: https://aboveinspiration.org ✭ TIKTOK:   / above__inspiration   Speaker: Billy Graham Music: Whitesand - Eternity    • Whitesand - Eternity (Epic Beautiful Drama...   Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/3GXun... Bandcamp - https://whitesand.bandcamp.com/ Our focus is to inspire, motivate and encourage believers in their walk with God. #aboveinspiration #inspire #encourage #motivation #inspiration #Jesus #God   BILLY GRAHAM | The Speech That Will Change Your Life Forever - Inspirational & Motivational Video Watch this video at-  https://youtu.be/V6ujbmidGPY?si=b8emxA3i0kKlqSgN ABOVE INSPIRATION 2.8M subscribers 502,204 views Apr 20, 2020 #encourage #God #Jesus Jesus came to seek and save the lost. He came to rescue sinners. Jesus calls all who are weary and burdened to come to Him and find rest. We don't need to wait for the perfect time to approach Jesus. Come as you are, He is waiting for you! ✩ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL ✩ ✭ SHOP: https://aboveinspiration.myspreadshop... ✭ JOIN: https://youtube.com/aboveinspiration/... ✭ DONATE: https://bit.ly/2IS5rgs ✩ FOLLOW US ✩ ✭ FACEBOOK:   / aboveinspiration   ✭ INSTAGRAM:   / above_inspiration   ✭ TWITTER:   / above_inspire   ✭ WEBSITE: https://aboveinspiration.org ✭ TIKTOK:   / above__inspiration   Speaker: Billy Graham Music: Whitesand - Eternity    • Whitesand - Eternity (Epic Beautiful Drama...   Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/3GXun... Bandcamp - https://whitesand.bandcamp.com/ Our focus is to inspire, motivate and encourage believers in their walk with God. #aboveinspiration #inspire #encourage #motivation #inspiration #Jesus #God   https://youtu.be/ggkRQbi6U4g?si=bbZ8p_COpGmK4aM4 Faith Over Fear: Walking the Path of Peace | Elder Quentin L. Cook The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 2.45M subscribers Subscribed 4K Share 81,634 views Jan 9, 2025 Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people? In the face of life's hardships, the promise remains: joy and peace await those who choose faith over fear and hope over despair. Jesus Christ's love offers strength to endure, healing for our wounds, and a path to rise above life's challenges with grace and courage. Through Him, every sorrow can be turned into purpose, and every trial into a step closer to eternal joy. "We do not know all the answers; however, we do know important principles that allow us to face trials, tribulation, and adversities with faith and confidence in a bright future that awaits each of us. "We can joyfully be peaceable followers of Christ." —Elder Quentin L. Cook (General Conference Oct. 2023) SUBSCRIBE to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the latest videos. Follow The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on Facebook: @churchofjesuschrist Twitter: @ch_jesuschrist Instagram: @ChurchOfJesusChrist Website: churchofjesuschrist.org   It's Not Too Late to Repent, But Don't Procrastinate | Elder D. Todd Christofferson Watch this video at- https://youtu.be/J5GKlJfQq3k?si=n4IT72wwYawmrOyq The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 2.45M subscribers 61,320 views Jan 19, 2025 Repentance is a gift made possible through the infinite sacrifice of Jesus Christ. It invites us to turn our hearts to Him, find forgiveness, and experience lasting joy. While it's never too late to embrace this sacred gift, the scriptures remind us not to delay. Each day offers an opportunity to make small course corrections, grow, and draw closer to our Savior. Let the love of Jesus Christ inspire you to repent daily—He is ready to welcome you with open arms. SUBSCRIBE to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the latest videos. Follow The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on Facebook: @churchofjesuschrist X: @ch_jesuschrist Instagram: @ChurchOfJesusChrist Website: churchofjesuschrist.org   Nearer, My God, to Thee Watch this video at- https://youtu.be/PKsr49csFYk?si=Xp5PEQuSLcJGVnwx The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 2.45M subscribers 12,975,888 views Apr 9, 2013 A priesthood choir from Young Single Adult stakes in Salt Lake sings "Nearer, My God, to Thee." Facebook:   / churchofjesuschrist   Twitter:   / ch_jesuschrist   Instagram:   / churchofjesuschrist   Website: ChurchOfJesusChrist.org   For over 10 ACU shows from our archives on the Atonement of Jesus Christ visit- https://acupodcast.podbean.com/?s=atonement   From ACU- For Come Follow Me lesson manual and materials visit- Come, Follow Me For Individuals and Families: New Testament 2023 https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/come-follow-me-for-individuals-and-families-new-testament-2023?lang=eng For a list of 100+ episodes of ACU Sunday Series visit- https://www.podbean.com/site/search/index?kdsowie31j4k1jlf913=85cb8104bdb182c048b714ad4385f9e82a3aeb49&v=ACU+Sunday+Series+ Note- Click on “100 Episodes Found” in upper right corner.   For many different Podcasts based on the ‘Come Follow Me' program visit- https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=come+follow+me+   Subscribe to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the latest videos: http://bit.ly/1M0iPwY Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/churchofjesu... Twitter: @Ch_JesusChrist Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ChurchOfJes... Website: ChurchOfJesusChrist.org The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints   BYUEducationWeek Get a Free Book of Mormon | ComeUntoChrist Church of Jesus Christ https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org › requests › free-...   The Book of Mormon brings you closer to Jesus. Click to download a free digital copy of the Book of Mormon and learn about it with online missionaries.   -------------------------------------------------------------------------- For the Strength of Youth To help you find the Way and to help you make Christ's doctrine the guiding influence in your life, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has prepared a new resource, a revised version of For the Strength of Youth.   For over 50 years, For the Strength of Youth has been a guide for generations of Latter-day Saint youth. I always keep a copy in my pocket, and I share it with people who are curious about our standards. It has been updated and refreshed to better cope with the challenges and temptations of our day. The new version of For the Strength of Youth is available online in 50 different languages and will also be available in print. It will be a significant help for making choices in your life. Please embrace it as your own and share it with your friends. This new version of For the Strength of Youth is subtitled A Guide for Making Choices. To be very clear, the best guide you can possibly have for making choices is Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the strength of youth. So the purpose of For the Strength of Youth is to point you to Him. It teaches you eternal truths of His restored gospel—truths about who you are, who He is, and what you can accomplish with His strength. It teaches you how to make righteous choices based on those eternal truths.13 It's also important to know what For the Strength of Youth does not do. It doesn't make decisions for you. It doesn't give you a “yes” or “no” about every choice you might ever face. For the Strength of Youth focuses on the foundation for your choices. It focuses on values, principles, and doctrine instead of every specific behavior. The Lord, through His prophets, has always been guiding us in that direction. He is pleading with us to “increase [our] spiritual capacity to receive revelation.”14 He is inviting us to “hear Him.”15 He is calling us to follow Him in higher and holier ways.16 And we are learning in a similar way every week in Come, Follow Me.   American Conservative University Podcast (ACU) is not an official representative for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. All opinions, selections and commentary are solely those of ACU.  We post a variety of selections from various Christian denominations.   ACU Endorsed Charities -------------------------------------------------------- Pre-Born! Saving babies and Souls. https://preborn.org/ OUR MISSION To glorify Jesus Christ by leading and equipping pregnancy clinics to save more babies and souls. WHAT WE DO Pre-Born! partners with life-affirming pregnancy clinics all across the nation. We are designed to strategically impact the abortion industry through the following initiatives:… -------------------------------------------------------- Help CSI Stamp Out Slavery In Sudan Join us in our effort to free over 350 slaves. Listeners to the Eric Metaxas Show will remember our annual effort to free Christians who have been enslaved for simply acknowledging Jesus Christ as their Savior. As we celebrate the birth of Christ this Christmas, join us in giving new life to brothers and sisters in Sudan who have enslaved as a result of their faith. https://csi-usa.org/metaxas   https://csi-usa.org/slavery/   Typical Aid for the Enslaved A ration of sorghum, a local nutrient-rich staple food A dairy goat A “Sack of Hope,” a survival kit containing essential items such as tarp for shelter, a cooking pan, a water canister, a mosquito net, a blanket, a handheld sickle, and fishing hooks. Release celebrations include prayer and gathering for a meal, and medical care for those in need. The CSI team provides comfort, encouragement, and a shoulder to lean on while they tell their stories and begin their new lives. Thank you for your compassion  Giving the Gift of Freedom and Hope to the Enslaved South Sudanese -------------------------------------------------------- Food For The Poor https://foodforthepoor.org/ Help us serve the poorest of the poor Food For The Poor began in 1982 in Jamaica. Today, our interdenominational Christian ministry serves the poor in primarily 17 countries throughout the Caribbean and Latin America. Thanks to our faithful donors, we are able to provide food, housing, healthcare, education, fresh water, emergency relief, micro-enterprise solutions and much more. We are proud to have fed millions of people and provided more than 15.7 billion dollars in aid. Our faith inspires us to be an organization built on compassion, and motivated by love. Our mission is to bring relief to the poorest of the poor in the countries where we serve. We strive to reflect God's unconditional love. It's a sacrificial love that embraces all people regardless of race or religion. 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Psalm 22 ESV Why Have You Forsaken Me?22 My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?    Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning?2 O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer,    and by night, but I find no rest.3 Yet you are holy,    enthroned on the praises[a] of Israel.4 In you our fathers trusted;    they trusted, and you delivered them.5 To you they cried and were rescued;    in you they trusted and were not put to shame.6 But I am a worm and not a man,    scorned by mankind and despised by the people.7 All who see me mock me;    they make mouths at me; they wag their heads;8 “He trusts in the Lord; let him deliver him;    let him rescue him, for he delights in him!”9 Yet you are he who took me from the womb;    you made me trust you at my mother's breasts.10 On you was I cast from my birth,    and from my mother's womb you have been my God.11 Be not far from me,    for trouble is near,    and there is none to help.12 Many bulls encompass me;    strong bulls of Bashan surround me;13 they open wide their mouths at me,    like a ravening and roaring lion.14 I am poured out like water,    and all my bones are out of joint;my heart is like wax;    it is melted within my breast;15 my strength is dried up like a potsherd,    and my tongue sticks to my jaws;    you lay me in the dust of death.16 For dogs encompass me;    a company of evildoers encircles me;they have pierced my hands and feet[b]—17 I can count all my bones—they stare and gloat over me;18 they divide my garments among them,    and for my clothing they cast lots.19 But you, O Lord, do not be far off!    O you my help, come quickly to my aid!20 Deliver my soul from the sword,    my precious life from the power of the dog!21     Save me from the mouth of the lion!You have rescued[c] me from the horns of the wild oxen!22 I will tell of your name to my brothers;    in the midst of the congregation I will praise you:23 You who fear the Lord, praise him!    All you offspring of Jacob, glorify him,    and stand in awe of him, all you offspring of Israel!24 For he has not despised or abhorred    the affliction of the afflicted,and he has not hidden his face from him,    but has heard, when he cried to him.25 From you comes my praise in the great congregation;    my vows I will perform before those who fear him.26 The afflicted[d] shall eat and be satisfied;    those who seek him shall praise the Lord!    May your hearts live forever!27 All the ends of the earth shall remember    and turn to the Lord,and all the families of the nations    shall worship before you.28 For kingship belongs to the Lord,    and he rules over the nations.29 All the prosperous of the earth eat and worship;    before him shall bow all who go down to the dust,    even the one who could not keep himself alive.30 Posterity shall serve him;    it shall be told of the Lord to the coming generation;31 they shall come and proclaim his righteousness to a people yet unborn,    that he has done it. For more information about Redeemer Church Lubbock visit our website at redeemerlubbock.org.

My God, My God | Psalm 22

The Tongue Conquers Enemies  (Audio) David Eells 9/22/24   A shaking is on the way. War appears to be breaking out on the surface.  The Covert war between the Alliance and the DS is likely to break out in larger overt operations. The DS has invaded the cities with terrorists and military-aged men and CCP Chinese along with others that are expanding the voter rolls within, in order to overthrow President Trump and the Alliance. They are preparing for terrorist acts because of the Brunson case has gone to the Supreme Court which will overthrow the DS government.  This from Operation Disclosure: The Brunson Brothers Voter Fraud Case before the Supreme Court asked a simple question: Did Congress investigate 50 formally filed allegations of voter fraud before certifying the 2020 Election? Obviously not, and rumor was that the Supreme Court had already ruled such on the case. We awaited an announcement likely in favor of Brunson that would dissolve the Biden Administration and all of Congress, plus bring in Martial Law until a new election was held.  Five separate assassination teams actively targeting President Trump. Three are foreign, two domestic. Three Assassination Attempts have come in the last few weeks. Your prayers and faith have cast down all five of these teams. President Trump is insulated.  Congressman Tim Burchett exposed the CIA's Sinister MK ULTRA plot to assassinate Trump! amg-news.com.  As we will see below your prayers and confession will cast most of the lawlessness down.  The DS anarchists plan on mass anarchy and destruction of cities and the Alliance military is being spread coast to coast before the announcement of the Supreme Court ruling in order to defend the cities and liberty from the lawless left who will not accept democracy. We cast down their weapons of warfare.     A New War Is Coming   Michael Boldea Jr. - 04/06/2007   Jeremiah 50:22 A sound of battle is in the land, and of great destruction. James 5:8 You also be patient. Establish your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is at hand.   I dreamt I was hearing what were at first faint hoof beats, but the closer they got, the louder they grew, until it was a thundering roar of not one or two horses but what seemed like hundreds. I felt as though the ground beneath me was shaking from the onrushing horses, and the sound of them became so loud, that I suddenly awoke in my bed. As I blinked a few times, adjusting to the darkness in my room, I noticed a shadow at the foot of my bed. I blinked again, and there stood the same man I have seen on previous occasions, dressed in battle armor, his hands resting atop each other before him, on the hilt of his sword.   “What is the meaning of what I just dreamt?” I asked, somehow knowing he had come to give me the interpretation.   “What you heard”, he began, “were the chariots of war, and they are swiftly approaching. A new war is coming, but it will be unlike this present one. Speak as you have spoken, pray as you have prayed, and walk as you have walked for dark days will soon come upon the land to which you are returning. Even now their enemies plot, even now their enemies unite under one banner, and soon they will make their intentions known to the world. There is no refuge but in the Father, and He will guide and protect those who know His voice”. (And confess His promises.)  I blinked again, and the man was gone, and I was left to ponder the words I had heard. I struggled with whether I should make this dream public, for I know the reaction that some will have to it, and the last thing I desire is to stir fear in the heart of any man. After much prayer I felt I was supposed to publish the dream, and though some may receive it as a reason to fear, the true children of God will receive it for what it was, the forewarning of a loving Father, preparing His children for what is to come. God's desire for us is not ignorance, but rather knowledge, that we may prepare our hearts, in prayer and fasting, that we may draw closer to Him, that we make Him our place of refuge long before hardship forces us to seek one. The wise man prepares, while the foolhardy is caught unaware.   Jeremiah 19:15 Thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel: 'Behold, I will bring on this city and on all her towns all the doom that I have pronounced against it, because they have stiffened their necks that they might not hear My words.       Terrorists Hiding in the States   Michael Boldea Jr. - May 5, 2003  I dreamt I was on a very high ridge, with a great valley spanning out beneath me. The night was calm, the moon and stars shining brightly in the sky. As I looked around trying to get my bearings, I was stunned to see my grandfather (Dumitru Duduman) standing next to me. He looked young and vibrant, his hands in his pockets, and a smile on his face.   “Interesting times ahead my boy, interesting times ahead”, he said. For a minute I was so shocked I couldn't say anything. Finally I blurted out the only thing that came to mind, “They have been interesting ever since you left. Trial after trial, hardship after hardship”.   “Now you know how Jesus felt when He walked the earth”, he answered, “always doing good, always in the Father's will, yet always mocked and rejected, always misunderstood and despised. Besides, it was all a test anyway”.  “A test of what?” I asked.   “For you personally, God wanted to see if you would stay true to your calling even when all seemed lost. He was preparing you and purging you, refining you, for the time when He will use you, and speak to you as He spoke to me”.   Before I could say anything, he lifted his hand to stop me. His fingers were no longer crooked from his arthritis, they were straight, and normal.   “I know what you're going to say my boy, it's not what you want, it's not what you asked for. But you should know by now it is the task you were chosen for. In this you have no choice, besides where can you hide from the face of God? Men have tried before, look how it turned out in the end. To reject what God has planned for you is to deny God. You know what the consequences are”. Unable to find the words to answer, I simply nodded my understanding and allowed him to continue speaking.   “As for why the ministry had to go through what it went through, God has already spoken that to your heart. You already know the answer. God wants all that know of this work, to be certain of one thing. It is He who sustains it; it is He who blesses it, and not the hands of men or their gimmicks. Do you think any of it would still be here after all that has happened if not for God? Never doubt Gods promises concerning this work, or His ability to fulfill them. Hope in God never disappoints; hope in man always leads to disillusionment.” (Amen. God has been preparing and sanctifying His Reformers to be leaders for the soon coming tribulation.)   “Now for the reason I am here. I was sent to show you something. Look and see”, he said, pointing down to the valley below. As I looked, I saw the outline of a map of America then the outlines of states began taking shape. As I continued to watch this map solidify, small lights began to flicker on and off in some of the states. I recognized California, Illinois, Michigan, Arizona, Washington State, Florida, and New York, among the states that lit up. The light was rhythmic, almost like a homing beacon, constant in its progression. I continued watching the lights go on and off, waiting for something else to happen, but nothing did. Finally I said, “I don't understand. What does this mean?”   “These are the places where those who were sent here long ago, to bring fear and cause chaos, have situated themselves. They lay in waiting, planning and plotting destruction. They are as coiled serpents, looking forward to the hour when they will be loosed upon this nation. If God's children pray, once more will He delay the season of sorrow that is yet to come”. (I believe He has done this.)   We stood on the ridge in silence for a long time. After a while the lights stopped flickering in the valley below, and the map began to fade away. Suddenly my grandfather turned his head toward the east, and began to sniff the air as he used to do. “Storms coming my boy, and it's a bad one”, he said. “Now give an old man a hug and let me be on my way. Be vigilant and work while you still can, it's all God asks of any of His servants. If the Father wills it, we will speak again”.   As I hugged my grandfather, I began to hear the rumbling of a great storm. The sky darkened overhead, and the booming of thunder was now audible. In my dream I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, I was in my bed, awake. I wiped at my cheeks with the back of my hand, and realized I had been crying. As my eyes began to adjust to the dark, I saw that my wife was sitting up in bed, staring at me. When I asked her why she wasn't sleeping, she said I'd been talking in my sleep for over thirty minutes. I tried going back to sleep but sleep would not come. Finally I gave up trying, went into the kitchen and prayed until morning.   Over the past few days, I have spent much time in prayer as to whether I should share this dream or not. I believe that I am supposed to. My prayer is that no one would perceive it as a reason for fear, but rather a reason to hope. God hears the prayers of His children, and as long as He encourages us to pray, we must do so without reservation. The day will come, a day I anticipate with great dread, when God will speak to His children as He spoke to Jeremiah, and say do not pray for this people, or lift up a cry for them any longer. For now, while we still can, may we ceaselessly bring our petitions before the Lord.       Our Secret Place of Safety   David Eells   Everyone is looking for the place of safety in the tribulations to come. One man says the safe place is to be with the Ark of the Covenant, which is said to be in a Chapel next to St Mary of Zion, Ethiopian Orthodox Church in Axum, Ethiopia. I believe that Solomon gave a copy of the Ark to the Queen of Sheba who carried it there.   Be that as it may; God no longer dwells in houses made by men, so the ark is a relic. (Acts 7:47) But Solomon built him (God) a house. (48) Howbeit the Most High dwelleth not in [houses] made with hands. That just tells us that the ark in the temple was just a type and shadow of Jesus in His body. As He said, “I in them, and thou in me, that they may be perfected into one” (Jn.17:23). God now dwells in the ark of Christ and Christ now dwells in the Body of Christ. In us He is the ark of the covenant overlaid round about with gold, wherein [was] a golden pot holding the manna (of the Word in us), and Aaron's rod that budded (a sign of the authority of the High Priest in us), and the tables of the covenant (of the law written on our heart) (Heb.9:4).   The presence of the Ark ensured Israel of victory and protection. When the Philistines captured the Ark it brought a curse on them so terrible that they sent it home with an offering. On the other hand Jesus said in (Mat.5:13) Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost its savor, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out and trodden under foot of men.   Another brother asked me if I thought the Christians will flee for safety to the city of Petra in Jordan. I told him that I thought Petra would be far too small to accommodate them and it would be a natural trap where they could be wiped out. I do believe that some natural Jews will find shelter in Petra, which is the Greek word for “rock”. However, spiritual Jews who are circumcised in heart, have the spiritual Rock of Jesus as a place of safety. Jesus said that standing on Him was the place where Hell had no power over us. (Mat.16:18) And I also say unto thee, that thou art Peter (Gr: “Petros”, meaning a piece of the rock), and upon this rock (Greek: Petra) I will build my church; and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. Jesus is our rock of safety.   Peter himself said that Jesus was the Rock that we are to be founded on. (1Pet.2:5) ye also, as living stones, are built up a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices, acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. (6) Because it is contained in scripture, Behold, I lay in Zion a chief corner stone, elect, precious: And he that believeth on him shall not be put to shame. (7) For you therefore that believe is the preciousness: but for such as disbelieve, The stone which the builders rejected, The same was made the head of the corner; (8) and, A stone of stumbling, and a rock of offence; for they stumble at the word, being disobedient: whereunto also they were appointed. The disobedient stumble through unbelief in the Word and so are not founded on the Rock. Judgment will take them away wherever they hide.   Those who are obedient to the Word through faith are on the safety of the Rock. (Mat.7:24) Every one therefore that heareth these words of mine, and doeth them, shall be likened unto a wise man, who built his house upon the rock: (25) and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and if fell not: for it was founded upon the rock. (26) And every one that heareth these words of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, who built his house upon the sand: (27) and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and smote upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall thereof. The apostate churches belittle obedience to the Word because of their unbelief.  We don't stand on the Rock in our own strength but our faith gives us God's strength. My wife had a dream of me after we first became Christians. She saw me standing on a Rock in the middle of the ocean. I had leg braces on like crippled people wear to strengthen their legs. I perceived that the Rock was Christ or the Word and the ocean was the curse as was the flood. In our own strength we are crippled and not able to stand on the Word, but the filling of His Spirit and faith in His promises empowers us to be what we normally are not.   It has come to me that only the rich in a time of economic collapse and wrath would be able to fly to the city of Petra, but salvation is for the poor. No amount of money can buy us safety, because it is not a place but a state of being. (Pr.11:4) Riches profit not in the day of wrath; but righteousness delivereth from death. (6) The righteousness of the upright shall deliver them; But the treacherous shall be taken in their own iniquity.   Faith in the Lord makes Him our secret refuge. (Psa.91:1) He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. Notice the confession that puts us on the Rock. (2) I will say of Jehovah, He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in whom I trust. The secret place of safety will be hidden to many who are only called “Christian” but the righteous are safe right in the middle of judgment. (7) A thousand shall fall at thy side, And ten thousand at thy right hand; [But] it shall not come nigh thee. (8) Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold, And see the reward of the wicked. (The good confession that puts us in safety.)  9 For thou, O Jehovah, art my refuge! Thou hast made the Most High thy habitation; 10  There shall no evil befall thee, Neither shall any plague come nigh thy tent. God's angels will protect the righteous wherever they are. (11) For he will give his angels charge over thee, To keep thee in all thy ways. (12) They shall bear thee up in their hands, Lest thou dash thy foot against a stone. They do this for the righteous who believe. (Gal.3:13) Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law, having become a curse for us; for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree: (14) that upon the Gentiles might come the blessing of Abraham in Christ Jesus.   A friend of mine had a very clear dream about the coming invasion of America. He said everyone in the Gulf States was fleeing toward the north to get as far away from the invading army as possible. He was going to get on a shuttle and go too, but the Lord told him to give his place to someone else and sent him and his family into a local city that had been nuked. He had no fear of the radiation or the enemy. It is obvious that God's people will not need to follow the world's example. Paul was not hiding but sharing the Gospel in the most effective time to do so. He said, “[in] journeyings often, [in] perils of rivers, [in] perils of robbers, [in] perils from [my] countrymen, [in] perils from the Gentiles, [in] perils in the city, [in] perils in the wilderness, [in] perils in the sea, [in] perils among false brethren” (2 Cor.11:26).   The Lord told me that this time represented the second 3½ years of the tribulation period. Paul also said, “what persecutions I endured. And out of them all the Lord delivered me” (2Tim.3:11). He also said, “But the Lord stood by me, and strengthened me; that through me the message might be fully proclaimed, and that all the Gentiles might hear: and I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion. The Lord will deliver me from every evil work, and will save me unto his heavenly kingdom” (2Tim.4:17,18).   If one is called to be a martyr, they will have the protection of God until their testimony is finished and even then only their flesh will be given up for a sacrifice. (Rev.11:7) And when they shall have finished their testimony, the beast that cometh up out of the abyss shall make war with them, and overcome them, and kill them.      Agree with the Blessed Provisions   David  We are in a battle which can be won by those who will speak the Word of the Lord and confess His promises for safety and provision. The Bible tells us that Death and life are in the power of the tongue (Pro.18:21). Let's look at how we can cooperate with God in the process of sanctification so that we are those who speak life and partake of the benefits of the Kingdom and able to give them to others. (Jas.3:8) But the tongue can no man tame; [it is] a restless evil, [it is] full of deadly poison. (9) Therewith bless we the Lord and Father; and therewith curse we men, who are made after the likeness of God: (10) out of the same mouth cometh forth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. (11) Doth the fountain send forth from the same opening [sweet water] and bitter? (12) can a fig tree, my brethren, yield olives, or a vine figs? neither [can] salt water yield sweet. We want to learn by the grace of God to bring forth those “sweet waters” so that we will not suffer with the wicked.  When Moses and the children of Israel came up to Marah, meaning “bitterness” (Exo 15:22-25), they couldn't drink the water. God commanded that a tree be cast into the waters so that they would be made sweet. Marah represents the bitter waters of the fountain, or mouth, which were cured by the tree, representing the Cross. The Cross has conquered our tongue and has given us this gift of the sweet waters so we can bring forth blessings, instead of the cursings, out of this spring of our mouth. Believe this.  The Bible also tells us, The heart of the wise instructeth his mouth, And addeth learning to his lips (Pro.16:23). So we want to educate ourselves to be swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to wrath (Jas.1:19). We need to think about what we are saying and disagree with the devil because he tempts us to speak the things under the curse and not the things of the Kingdom. The Lord is helping us and He has already conquered the tongue, which no man can tame, but the Lord can through His Word and promises. Jesus was the sacrifice Who gave us a new tongue through the reconciliation.   It says in (Jos.1:6) Be strong and of good courage; for thou shalt cause this people to inherit the land which I sware unto their father to give them. (7) Only be strong and very courageous, to observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest have good success whithersoever thou goest. Notice that God said that Joshua (Hebrew: “Jesus”) was going to cause His people to be brought into their inherited Promised Land. This land belongs to us, not every Pagen alien they can invade us with and we will win this battle with them.  We know that the Promised Land is also us. Heb 6:7-8 For the land which hath drunk the rain that cometh oft upon it, and bringeth forth herbs meet for them for whose sake it is also tilled, receiveth blessing from God: 8 but if it beareth thorns and thistles, it is rejected and nigh unto a curse; whose end is to be burned. Jesus bore this curse let us confess Him before men.  The Son of God is being manifested in His people. (Col.1:27) … Christ in you, the hope of glory. He is a product of the Word of God being assimilated in our life and mouth; Christ is the Word of God (John 1:14). He saved us from our enemies. (Luk.1:70-74) (As he spake by the mouth of his holy prophets that have been from of old), 71 Salvation from our enemies, and from the hand of all that hate us; ...74 To grant unto us that we being delivered out of the hand of our enemies Should serve him without fear,  You crucify the spiritual man when you walk and talk in the flesh and for those who have been filled with the Holy Spirit and enlightened, who have tasted of the heavenly gift, this will become a curse unto them. (Heb.6:7) For the land which hath drunk the rain (Those who have partaken of the Word from heaven.) that cometh oft upon it, and bringeth forth herbs meet for them for whose sake it is also tilled, receiveth blessing from God: (8) but if it beareth thorns and thistles, it is rejected and nigh unto a curse; whose end is to be burned. The word “rejected” is adokimos, meaning, specifically, “reprobated.” The apostle Paul said that he kept his body under control if, perhaps, after he had preached to others, he himself would be “rejected” or “reprobated” (1Co 9:27). This has been demonstrated to us.   God doesn't reprobate land; He reprobates people. The Bible is very plain; in the original Greek, we are God's “tilled land” (1Co.3:9). God wants to plow this earth, our natural life, and plant His seed in the midst of it, bringing forth the fruit of Jesus Christ in us. The land that Joshua wants to cause us to inherit is referring to our new fruit and life. Part of that is our bold faith. The spiritual man, the Israelite, is to conquer this land with the edge of the Sword, the Word of God. The spiritual man is to take the land from the enemy, the Canaanite and live in his house, our body, and plant his crop and bear the fruit of the spiritual man.   (Jos.1:7) Only be strong and very courageous, to observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest have good success whithersoever thou goest. Notice that turning to the right or left would cause failure to take our Promised Land from the enemies.   I had a dream many years ago where I was standing on a mountain, looking down into a valley and a road that went down the side of this mountain. The road had a ditch or trench down the middle of it. I was in a car, with one set of tires on one side of the trench and the other set on the other side, going down this road to the bottom of the mountain. I realized I couldn't turn to the right or the left because, if I did, two wheels would fall into the trench and that would be the end of any progress; I wouldn't go any farther. I steered very carefully, not to the right and not to the left, as I went down this mountain. Let us speak what the Word says about us.  The Lord gave me the understanding afterward that this mountain represented the kingdom of the world – man, self or the old life. I was to navigate this road and not turn to the right or left, until I got off of this mountain. As soon as I was at the bottom, I immediately realized that there were enemies everywhere. To the extent that we humble ourselves to the Word of God, going down the mountain of “self,” the more enemies we will have, even religious enemies or so-called “Christian” enemies. (2Ti.3:12) … All that would live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. But as we hold fast to the confession of our hope the enemies will be conquered as our faction was and the political faction shall be. (Luk10:19) Behold, I have given you authority to tread upon serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall in any wise hurt you.  Most of the persecution toward Jesus and the disciples came from the people who called themselves the “people of God” but were not. When I got to the bottom and knew that the enemy was everywhere, I went under a bush and there I found tools that I picked up, and treated them as if they were treasure. These tools were hammers, screwdrivers, wrenches and so on. The Lord later revealed to me that these tools represented the authority to bind and loose (Mat 18:18), as all of these tools do. The Lord made me to know I was coming to a time, when under the bush, I was going to manifest more of this authority. Let us bind our enemies in the name of Jesus.   At the time of the burning bush, Moses was given authority to go into Egypt to act for the Lord. I've been binding and loosing for many years but I believe that we're coming to a time of real power from God. It's only going to come to those who humble themselves and don't turn to the right or to the left, but stay on God's road, a self-crucifying path of obedience to the Word of God. When I picked up these tools, I went up another mountain, which represented Mount Zion. I went through the front doors of a great temple, which I believe represented the New Jerusalem on Mount Zion and I saw Jesus sitting on His throne. I went over and sat down next to Him, as He said that overcomers would do. (Rev.3:21) He that overcometh, I will give to him to sit down with me in my throne, as I also overcame, and sat down with my Father in his throne. This is the throne of dominion over our enemies.  As I was speaking with Jesus, I heard people trying to come into the throne room by a back way and not through the door that I had come through. Jesus is the door in John 10:1. Jesus saw these people and said, “Don't worry about them; they can't come in here.” So these were people looking for “throne room” authority but they wouldn't humble themselves to the Word of God personally. The Pharisees only had physical authority as in our day. God will give authority only to those who overcome according to Rev 2:26. Back to (Jos.1:8) This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth, but thou shalt meditate thereon day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success. The spiritual man speaks the Word so that as you walk, it will bring good success when conquering our Promised Land for the Lord. The first fruits are approaching this point. We must speak according to God's promises, even in the midst of the fiery trial. As Christians, we “calleth the things that are not, as though they were” (Rom.4:17). We speak the things we have according to promise and not according to what we see in the world. This is how we change the things around us. This is God's plan. We let the Word, or our agreement with the Word in what we say, come from our mouth so that we may have good success in conquering our Promised Land.   Further on in Joshua, we see that he is still leading the people of God to conquer their Promised Land in order to put to death their enemies there. In this particular case, the head of God's people, Joshua, is conquering the Amorites. (Jos.10:12) Then spake Joshua to the Lord in the day when the Lord delivered up the Amorites before the children of Israel; and he said in the sight of Israel, Sun, stand thou still upon Gibeon; And thou, Moon, in the valley of Aijalon. I believe God is showing us here to what extent He would go to give our enemy into our hands, if we would speak the Word with boldness.   (Jos.10:8) And the Lord said unto Joshua, Fear them not: for I have delivered them into thy hands; there shall not a man of them stand before thee. On a personal and spiritual level that “man” He was referring to was the old man who lived in the Promised Land of our life before the new man took possession. He represented the lusts of the flesh, which would not be able to stand. On a physical and political level it would be the DS and their invading army. Joshua and the children of Israel were having victory over the Amorites but they were running out of time. Remember, the Lord said that if we confess Him before men, He shall confess us before the Father in Mat 10:32.   Likewise, Joshua confessed in the sight of Israel. He was bold and full of faith and he spoke it right in front of Israel, Sun, stand thou still upon Gibeon; And thou, Moon, in the valley of Aijalon (Jos.10:12). (13) And the sun stood still, and the moon stayed, Until the nation had avenged themselves of their enemies. Is not this written in the book of Jashar? And the sun stayed in the midst of heaven, and hasted not to go down about a whole day.   Now at first, I thought God just stopped Earth from spinning, but I later realized that the moon stayed in the same relative position as the sun and Earth didn't spin. It's possible the whole solar system had stopped. This is a very dangerous thing to do, unless you also control the rest of the universe. Things would tend toward collision down the road somewhere. Can you imagine that God stopped the solar system and more, just so Israel could conquer their enemy? What kind of other big miracle can you imagine that God would do for us to give us victory over our enemy? God gave the Israelites an awesome victory over their enemies! Of course, they needed the time and, for a whole day, the system was frozen. We have all heard of NASA finding the missing day so they could calculate where things would be at a certain time.  People claim that God only did that back then and does not do that today, simply because of the verse right after it. (Jos.10:14) And there was no day like that before it or after it, that the Lord hearkened unto the voice of a man: for the Lord fought for Israel. Well, the Lord still hearkens unto our voice, for many people speak miracles today and they come to pass as they did in the Bible long after Joshua. The key here is “voice of a man” The creation now hearkens to the voice of God through man.  Jesus said, the words that I have spoken unto you are spirit, and are life (Joh.6:63), meaning they are His Spirit and His life. In other words, it's the life of God living in us; it's the spiritual man who speaks in agreement with the Word of God. Also, it is the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God (Eph.6:17). Therefore, it's not as if God is hearkening unto the voice of a man, but He is hearkening unto the voice of His sons. That spiritual man in us is not man, but God. The Son of God is manifesting in His people speaking His Words out of us. When we come into agreement with the Word, we can be trusted. The Lord said, If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatsoever ye will, and it shall be done unto you (Joh.15:7). Why? The Word in you is trustworthy to God. If you fill yourself up with the Word and you desire earnestly to walk in agreement with it, God says you're trustworthy.   A long time after Joshua, the Lord wrote this: (Isa.45:11) Thus saith the Lord, the Holy One of Israel, and his Maker: Ask me of the things that are to come; concerning my sons, and concerning the work of my hands, command ye me. Does God really do that? When you command something to be done, like when His disciples commanded healings, deliverances, provision and so on, God fulfilled it. God gave them the authority, which is the right to use power and it's what we do when we speak in agreement with the Word of God. In effect, what we are doing is commanding God, since He said that if we do, He will do it and Jesus said the same.   Psalm 8 was spoken concerning the natural Adam and his seed, but also in type to spiritual Adam, Jesus Christ, and His seed. (Psa.8:6) Thou makest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands; Thou hast put all things under his feet. This was said of man and the Son of man. Jesus said that God had given Him authority because He is son of man (Joh.5:27). Man was given authority on the earth but when Adam sinned, he lost that authority to Satan. However, we gained it back through Jesus Christ because He was faithful. We now have this authority over the works of God's hands when we speak in agreement with the Word of God and He fulfills it. (Lam.3:37) Who is he that saith, and it cometh to pass, when the Lord commandeth it not?   The next thing we see in Joshua is that they went after the five kings who were ruling the Promised Land. (Jos.10:16) And these five kings fled, and hid themselves in the cave at Makkedah. (17) And it was told Joshua, saying, The five kings are found, hidden in the cave at Makkedah. (18) And Joshua said, Roll great stones unto the mouth of the cave, and set men by it to keep them: (19) but stay not ye; pursue after your enemies, and smite the hindmost of them; suffer them not to enter into their cities: for the Lord your God hath delivered them into your hand. The first thing they did was trap the five kings in the cave and then they rolled great stones over the mouth of the cave.   Adam was created from the dust of the earth and this old man is earthly, but as we have borne the image of the earthy, we shall also bear the image of the heavenly (1Co.15:49). We are both earthly and heavenly, a spiritual man of the heavens and the carnal man of the earth represented by this cave in the earth. The carnal man of the earth has a mouth and here it's called “the mouth of the cave.” The Lord made the spiritual men roll these great stones over the mouth of the cave. The five kings represent the five senses and the spiritual man put stones, which represent the Word, over the mouth so the carnal senses are not permitted to speak and bring a curse.   The Bible says that senses must be exercised by the Word of God so that we understand the difference between good and evil. (Heb.5:13) For every one that partaketh of milk is without experience of the word of righteousness; for he is a babe. (14) But solid food is for fullgrown men, [even] those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern good and evil. Born-again people have born-again senses. As spiritual men, we must have spiritual senses. Our carnal senses trap and rule over us and our land when we live according to what we see, hear and feel as the old man and the world does.   God teaches us how to spiritually see in (2Pe.1:3) Seeing that his divine power hath granted unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that called us by his own glory and virtue. We see that God has already provided us everything that pertains unto life and godliness! Now you have the eyes of a dove (Son 1:15). You have the eyes of the Spirit when you begin to see that the promises are true, but the world is transitory. (2Pe.1:4) Whereby he hath granted unto us his precious and exceeding great promises (the stones at the mouth of the cave); that through these ye may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world by lust.   Having eyes to see, we can partake of God's nature. We will have spiritual eyes, ears, touch, spiritual smell (or discernment), spiritual taste and words. We've been given these spiritual gifts that enable the spiritual man to take over. The Israelites had captured the five kings who ruled the Promised Land in a cave and they closed up the mouth with great stones. And we know, Jesus is the Stone; He's the Rock which is the Word of God. These great stones represent the great promises of the Word of God. We're adding learning to our lips, which are the “mouth of the cave.”   When we study the Word of God, we learn and see what we are supposed to say and what we're not supposed to say. It gives us restraint to not say things that would permit a curse upon our life. The Israelites had to conquer the Promised Land, and conquer these kings that ruled over the carnal man and bring the curse upon him. And this is what the parable points to – rolling out those stones in front of the mouth. (Eph.4:29) Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but such as is good for edifying (building-up) as the need may be, that it may give grace to them that hear.   We can see that we can apply many verses when speaking of conquering the DS with all their invaders who are getting ready to overthrow this land we live in. Just a couple come quickly to mind. (Mat.18:18-19) Verily I say unto you, What things soever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and what things soever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father who is in heaven. And (Mar.11:23-24) Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou taken up and cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that what he saith cometh to pass; he shall have it. 24 Therefore I say unto you, All things whatsoever ye pray and ask for, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them. These will come in useful when the invaders rise up.  If we see and walk in the Spirit, then we speak in agreement with the Spirit. (2Co.7:1) Having therefore these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all defilement of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. Our nature is changed by the Word of God when …we all, with unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are transformed into the same image from glory to glory, even as from the Lord the Spirit. (2Co 3:18) When we see a need, such as someone living under the curse, we should speak truth with grace to them to overcome, grace to meet that need, whatever it may be. When we speak according to the Kingdom, we are meeting someone's need for God and His benefits. Saving this country from the invaders to whatever extent God permits is a need.  They will be permitted to persecute the apostate Church for it is in rebellion to the Word of our covenant. (Col.3:17) And whatsoever ye do, in word or in deed, [do] all in the name (Greek: “nature, character and authority”) of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Do everything as if you are representing Him because you are an ambassador of Christ (2Co 5:20), so speak His words to this world and His enemies. We're called to confess Him before men always and to speak in His name.   (1Pe.4:11) If any man speaketh, speaking as it were oracles of God; if any man ministereth, [ministering] as of the strength which God supplieth: that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, whose is the glory and the dominion for ever and ever. Amen. When we speak as an oracle of God, that is His Word coming out of us, we're letting the spiritual man, who is in communication with God through our spirit, do the speaking. We don't let the carnal man, the flesh, do the speaking.   To walk holy is to walk separate. The Greek word for “holy” is the same word for “sanctified” and it means “separate”; that is, separated from the world, from sin, separated unto God. We speak His words, think His thoughts and we do His works because He lives in us. The more we do that, the more we grow in holiness. It's the place of Holiness, preservation and provision. Without holiness, no man can see the Lord (Heb 12:14). Holiness is what we grow in when we bear the fruit of Jesus Christ. It is separation from the old man, who is moved and ruled by the carnal senses, unto the new man, who is ruled according to the spiritual senses.   Now let's go to (Isa.11:2) And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the Lord. (3) And his delight shall be in the fear of the Lord; and he shall not judge after the sight of his eyes, neither decide after the hearing of his ears; (4) but with righteousness shall he judge the poor (This is poor in the things of the Kingdom), and decide with equity for the meek of the earth; and he shall smite the earth with the rod of his mouth; and with the breath of his lips shall he slay the wicked. (5) And righteousness shall be the girdle of his waist, and faithfulness the girdle of his loins.   He's talking about Christ in His first-fruits Man-child in the end-time who will not walk according to the carnal senses because he shall not judge after the sight of his eyes, neither decide after the hearing of his ears (Isa.11:3). Instead, we are to have our senses exercised to discern good from evil (Heb 5:14) by the Word of God, which is the washing of water with the word (Eph.5:26). As our senses are exercised, we begin to see and hear spiritually; we begin to hear and speak the Voice of the Spirit.   It's similar to when David went to slay Goliath, the giant in the land. He went to the brook and pulled out those five smooth stones that were exercised by the washing of the water, which represents the Word. He took only one of those stones and he felled Goliath (1Sa 17). David spoke it to him ahead of time, declaring that he would take off Goliath's head and feed him to the birds. That's very bold! And because David spoke it, that's exactly what he did. The stone, or sense, that David was using was the tongue. The tongue senses tastes but it also speaks the Word. David conquered Goliath because he had spiritual senses.   Now we can return to Joshua. He told the Israelites to go after their enemies, since the five kings were already trapped in the cave and closed off with the stones. Now they were able to conquer those whom the kings had ruled over. (Jos.10:20) And it came to pass, when Joshua and the children of Israel had made an end of slaying them with a very great slaughter, till they were consumed, and the remnant which remained of them had entered into the fortified cities, (21) that all the people returned to the camp to Joshua at Makkedah in peace: none moved his tongue against any of the children of Israel.   (22) Then said Joshua, Open the mouth of the cave, and bring forth those five kings unto me out of the cave. (23) And they did so, and brought forth those five kings unto him out of the cave, the king of Jerusalem, the king of Hebron, the king of Jarmuth, the king of Lachish, the king of Eglon. (24) And it came to pass, when they brought forth those kings unto Joshua, that Joshua called for all the men of Israel, and said unto the chiefs of the men of war that went with him, Come near, put your feet upon the necks of these kings. And they came near, and put their feet upon the necks of them.   They let them out of the cave and they had to keep them from speaking, so they put their feet on their necks. It reminds me of the dream I've shared before about being in a war with a giant and not letting the old man speak. When he did, he said, “Bigger, bigger, bigger!” We have a lot of giants around us – a lot of big problems and a lot of big enemies. But we can't let the old man, whom I captured in the dream and who was in bondage to me, speak out of our mouth. I didn't want to let him speak because the old man has the authority to make the situation worse and make the enemy stronger and bigger. I refused him and demanded that the giant be reduced, saying, “No! Smaller, smaller, smaller.”   Similarly, the Israelites put their feet on the kings' necks, causing the five senses to not speak or to rule over the body. (Jos.10:25) And Joshua said unto them, Fear not, nor be dismayed; be strong and of good courage: for thus shall the Lord do to all your enemies against whom ye fight. (Notice, you speak the Word and the Lord will do it. In Rev.12:11, the devil and his angels were cast down by the “word of their testimony” of the saints.)  (26) And afterward Joshua smote them, and put them to death, and hanged them on five trees: and they were hanging upon the trees until the evening. Notice that all of our enemies, firstly our old man, will be conquered in this way. Father said against Babylon in Jer.51:3 …Utterly destroy all her army. We are not permitted to wrestle with flesh nor use fleshly weapons but to “resist not” and if opportunity arises we are to preach Christ to them.  But we have authority over all their power and that includes the principalities and powers. (Luk.10:19) Behold, I have given you authority to tread upon serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall in any wise hurt you. As an example to us, before Jesus' time of crucifixion, when the Jews sought to throw him off a cliff, he just passed through their midst unharmed. I was shot at by an assassin from close range and my angel made the bullet disappear. A tractor back blade was thrown straight at my head by a demon, while Michael watched, but all I felt was a finger on my nose pushing me to the ground with zero pain. That was just ahead of the blade. Michael was sure it had hit and killed me.  My tractor wheel fell into a hole and the tractor was flipping into a gully. I was looking straight down at the ground when the tractor uprighted with me stuck in the seat. It was a work of our satanists. Several other times I escaped them. (Luk.1:68) ...For he hath visited and wrought redemption for his people... 71 Salvation from our enemies, and from the hand of all that hate us...74 To grant unto us that we being delivered out of the hand of our enemies Should serve him without fear.  Jesus Christ was hanged upon a tree, or cross, and they wanted to take Him down before evening, too. Jesus also was buried in a cave. So why is God applying this to the senses of the old man? (Gal.2:20) I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I that live, but Christ living in me: and that life which I now live in the flesh I live in faith, the faith which is in the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself up for me. That includes our five senses. The Lord has already taken care of this problem when He was crucified on that tree and you were crucified with Him. You have been given this gift of the new man, for by one offering he hath perfected forever them that are sanctified (Heb.10:14).  We walk in the spirit according to these divine senses that are attuned to the Kingdom of Heaven. These senses see how to walk in the Kingdom. It comes quite naturally to us to walk in the world but it comes supernaturally to us to walk in the Kingdom; that is, to have our senses exercised by the Word of God to see and hear the way God sees and hears, and to smell, or discern, the way God does. It is also to have our emotions in communication with God.   We have the victory over the old man and his senses because he's dead and the new man, Who is Jesus Christ, lives in you. Because of your faith and speaking that faith, God will bring it to pass. He will do it through our faith and not by our works. (Eph.2:8) For by grace have ye been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, [it is] the gift of God; (9) not of works, that no man should glory.   Father, we pray that You will (Psa.141:3) Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; Keep the door of my lips. Amen.  So we know that in the Kingdom of Heaven, there is singing, praise, worship and thanksgiving to the Lord our King. When we do this, we are bringing more of His Kingdom down here to earth. (Mat.6:10)  We have ‘authority over all the power of the enemy' (Luk.10:19). We have power in praise. When we praise the Lord, He gives us the victory!       Worship and Praise   Vines Expository Dictionary on the Greek word Worship: “to make obeisance, do reverence to” (from pros, “towards”, and kuneo, “to kiss”), is the most frequent word rendered “to worship”. It is used of an act of homage or reverence. In other words, worship is an act of love toward God.   Father is looking for those who worship Him with their all: (Joh.4:21) Jesus saith unto her, Woman, believe me, the hour cometh, when neither in this mountain, nor in Jerusalem, shall ye worship the Father. (22) Ye worship that which ye know not: we worship that which we know; for salvation is from the Jews. (23) But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and truth: for such doth the Father seek to be his worshippers. (24) God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship in spirit and truth. There is much fake worship -- words without heart and spirit.   Worship is the way to bring God's presence: (Psa.100:1) Make a joyful noise unto Jehovah, all ye lands. (2) Serve Jehovah with gladness: Come before his presence with singing. (3) Know ye that Jehovah, he is God: It is he that hath made us, and we are his; We are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. (4) Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, And into his courts with praise: Give thanks unto him, and bless his name. (5) For Jehovah is good; His lovingkindness endureth forever, And his faithfulness unto all generations.   Worship reveals our love and admiration for God and He knows it: (1Ch.29:11) Thine, O Jehovah, is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty: for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O Jehovah, and thou art exalted as head above all.   Praise Him everywhere, with a new song that comes from your heart, and dancing and with all instruments and enemies will be conquered: (Psa.149:1) Praise ye Jehovah. Sing unto Jehovah a new song, And his praise in the assembly of the saints. (2) Let Israel rejoice in him that made him: Let the children of Zion be joyful in their King. (3) Let them praise his name in the dance: Let them sing praises unto him with timbrel and harp. (4) For Jehovah taketh pleasure in his people: He will beautify the meek with salvation. (5) Let the saints exult in glory: Let them sing for joy upon their beds. (This will bind our enemies works against us.)  (7)  To execute vengeance upon the nations, And punishments upon the peoples;  (8)  To bind their kings with chains, And their nobles with fetters of iron;  (9)  To execute upon them the judgment written: This honor have all his saints. Praise ye Jehovah. (Children can conquer enemies in worship.) Psa 8:2  Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou established strength, Because of thine adversaries, That thou mightest still the enemy and the avenger. (150:1) Praise ye Jehovah. Praise God in his sanctuary: Praise him in the firmament of his power. (2) Praise him for his mighty acts: Praise him according to his excellent greatness. (3) Praise him with trumpet sound: Praise him with psaltery and harp. (4) Praise him with timbrel and dance: Praise him with stringed instruments and pipe. (5) Praise him with loud cymbals: Praise him with high sounding cymbals. (6) Let everything that hath breath praise Jehovah. Praise ye Jehovah. It is the will of the Lord to worship in songs and hymns: (Eph.5:17) Wherefore be ye not foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. (18) And be not drunken with wine, wherein is riot, but be filled with the Spirit; 19 speaking one to another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; (20) giving thanks always for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; We give thanks to God; this is a secret of power because we believe we have already received what we asked, right?   Praise (meaning “brag on”) Him to everyone: (1Ch.16:23) Sing unto Jehovah, all the earth; Show forth his salvation from day to day. (24) Declare his glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the peoples. (25) For great is Jehovah, and greatly to be praised: He also is to be feared above all gods. (26) For all the gods of the peoples are idols: But Jehovah made the heavens. (27) Honor and majesty are before him: Strength and gladness are in his place. (28) Ascribe unto Jehovah, ye kindreds of the peoples, Ascribe unto Jehovah glory and strength; (29) Ascribe unto Jehovah the glory due unto his name: Bring an offering, and come before him: Worship Jehovah in holy array. (30) Tremble before him, all the earth: The world also is established that it cannot be moved. (31) Let the heavens be glad, and let the earth rejoice; And let them say among the nations, Jehovah reigneth.   We are taught to worship, praise and pray with hands lifted up to the Lord: (1Ti.2:8) I desire therefore that the men pray in every place, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and disputing. (Psa.63:4) So will I bless thee while I live: I will lift up my hands in thy name. (Lam.3:41) Let us lift up our heart with our hands unto God in the heavens. (Neh.8:6) and Ezra blessed Jehovah, the great God. And all the people answered, Amen, Amen, with the lifting up of their hands: and they bowed their heads, and worshipped Jehovah with their faces to the ground.   Why lifting up hands? Offering our hands to the Lord for His works and to conquer His enemies: (Exo.17:9) And Moses said unto Joshua, Choose us out men, and go out, fight with Amalek: to-morrow I will stand on the top of the hill with the rod of God in my hand. (10) So Joshua did as Moses had said to him, and fought with Amalek: and Moses, Aaron, and Hur went up to the top of the hill. (11) And it came to pass, when Moses held up his hand, that Israel prevailed; and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed. (12) But Moses' hands were heavy; and they took a stone, and put it under him, and he sat thereon; and Aaron and Hur stayed up his hands, the one on the one side, and the other on the other side; And his hands were steady until the going down of the sun. (13) And Joshua discomfited Amalek and his people with the edge of the sword.   Worship and praise will conquer overwhelming enemies: (2Ch.20:17) Ye shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourselves, stand ye still, and see the salvation of Jehovah with you, O Judah and Jerusalem; fear not, nor be dismayed: to-morrow go out against them: for Jehovah is with you. (18) And Jehoshaphat bowed his head with his face to the ground; and all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem fell down before Jehovah, worshipping Jehovah. (19) And the Levites, of the children of the Kohathites and of the children of the Korahites, stood up to praise Jehovah, the God of Israel, with an exceeding loud voice.   (20) And they rose early in the morning, and went forth into the wilderness of Tekoa: and as they went forth, Jehoshaphat stood and said, Hear me, O Judah, and ye inhabitants of Jerusalem: believe in Jehovah your God, so shall ye be established; believe his prophets, so shall ye prosper. (21) And when he had taken counsel with the people, he appointed them that should sing unto Jehovah, and give praise in holy array, as they went out before the army, and say, Give thanks unto Jehovah; for his lovingkindness endureth forever. (22) And when they began to sing and to praise, Jehovah set liers-in-wait against the children of Ammon, Moab, and mount Seir, that were come against Judah; and they were smitten. (The angels will smite the enemies in the land.)  Worship to bind the enemy and their kings: (Psa.149:6) Let the high praises of God be in their mouth, And a two-edged sword in their hand; (7) To execute vengeance upon the nations, And punishments upon the peoples; (The Lord is doing this.) (8) To bind their kings with chains, And their nobles with fetters of iron; (9) To execute upon them the judgment written: This honor have all his saints. Praise ye Jehovah.   Because judgment and enemies are near, fear God and worship Him: (Rev.14:7) and he saith with a great voice, Fear God, and give him glory; for the hour of his judgment is come: and worship him that made the heaven and the earth and sea and fountains of waters. (Dan.3:16) Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego answered and said to the king, O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer thee in this matter. (17) If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace; and he will deliver us out of thy hand, O king. (18) But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.   (2Ki.17:38) and the covenant that I have made with you ye shall not forget; neither shall ye fear other gods: (39) but Jehovah your God shall ye fear; and he will deliver you out of the hand of all your enemies.   We can clap and shout our triumph over our enemies. Triumph is celebrating the victory before we see it: (Psa.47:1) Oh clap your hands, all ye peoples; Shout unto God with the voice of triumph. (Jos.6:20) So the people shouted, and the priests blew the trumpets; and it came to pass, when the people heard the sound of the trumpet, that the people shouted with a great shout, and the wall fell down flat, so that the people went up into the city, every man straight before him, and they took the city.   Praise in Hebrew is “Hallal”, meaning brag on the Lord. Give credit or ascribe to the Lord: (Psa.29:1) Ascribe unto Jehovah, O ye sons of the mighty, Ascribe unto Jehovah glory and strength. (2) Ascribe unto Jehovah the glory due unto his name; Worship Jehovah in holy array. (3) The voice of Jehovah is upon the waters: The God of glory thundereth, Even Jehovah upon many waters. (4) The voice of Jehovah is powerful; The voice of Jehovah is full of majesty. (5) The voice of Jehovah breaketh the cedars; Yea, Jehovah breaketh in pieces the cedars of Lebanon. When we speak in agreement with the Word of God, we are giving “voice” to the Word and the angels hearken to His voice. (Psa.103:20) Bless Jehovah, ye his angels, That are mighty in strength, that fulfil his word, Hearkening unto the voice of his word. Amen! 

Up To Jerusalem - Teaching 18 Scripture: Zechariah 12:10, John 19:31-42, Matthew 27:3-10, Acts 1:18-19, Matthew 28:1-4, Mark 16:1-4, Luke 24:1-10, John 20:1-18, 1 Corinthians 15:20. Today we look at Jesus' resurrection.  Jesus dies on a Friday and this particular Friday was Friday, the Day of Preparation - the day of preparing the lambs for a special Saturday Sabbath, the First Sabbath of Passover.  Following Saturday, the First Sabbath of Passover was Sunday, and this particular Sunday was also a special day as well, it was the Day of First Fruits.  Jesus would rise on this day, from the grave, and on that day He would rise as the first fruits of those who rise from the dead. “But now Christ is risen from the dead, and become the firstfruits of those who slept.” 1 Cor 15:20. Back to our story, John tells us that Jesus' legs were not broken - something done by Roman soldiers to insure death, but they pierced His side with a spear. This fulfills scripture, “They will look on me whom they have pierced and mourn for him as for an only son.” Zech 12:10. Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus wrapped Jesus' body in linen and spices and laid Him in a new tomb. Jesus' followers are in deep grief. The next morning, Saturday, the First Sabbath of Passover, chief priests and pharisees go to Pilate to ask for Jesus' tomb to be made secure because Jesus had said He would rise after 3 days, and the chief priests and pharisees want to stop anyone from stealing the body and making it look like Jesus did rise from the dead.  They seal the tomb and place guard at it. Then the next day - Sunday - the Day of First Fruits - is Jesus' resurrection day! Pastor puts together the 4 gospel accounts of the women that came to the tomb that morning. While it appears they are in conflict Pastor lays things out using a map of Jerusalem and suggests those with further interest to read the book “Easter Enigma: Are the Resurrection Accounts in Conflict” by John Wenham. Pastor shares historical information of the time period that supports the biblical narrative, even sharing recent archaeological information regarding the possible location of Jesus' tomb. Using all four gospels, Pastor takes us through who these women were and their early morning activities of visiting the tomb and putting forth the order of the morning events. As we continue with the story, we read there was another violent earthquake and angels came down from heaven, scare the guards and then roll the stone from the sealed tomb. Now the women enter the tomb to find it empty. Mary Magdalene decides to run and let the disciples know what they found. The other women ask the angels where they have put Jesus' body and they tell them He's not there as He has risen just as He said He would.  At this point Peter and other disciples head for the tomb. Inside they see the strips of linen and the cloth around Jesus' head lying there and head back to where they were staying.  Mary Magdelene is back at the tomb and is the first to see and speak to Jesus. She's outside the tomb crying and looks inside to see 2 angels seated where Jesus' body had been - one at the head the other at the feet. Pastor shares insight into the similarity of the two angels sitting as they were where Jesus had been and the Ark of the Covenant in the holy of Holies. A fascinating comparison. The angels ask Mary why she is crying and she replies that they have take her Lord. She turns around and there is Jesus!  Though she doesn't yet recognize Him. Jesus asks her as the angels had about why she was crying. Looking at Jesus, who she thought was the gardener, she says, “They have taken Jesus, do you know where they have taken Him?” Then Jesus says, “Mary.” And she immediately recognized Him! She cries out in joy and Jesus tells her, “Go to my brothers, tell them I'm ascending to my Father and your Father, to My God and your God, and tell them what you have seen!” This is only the morning's events!  Join us next time for the rest of all that happened that Resurrection Sunday! Our website – https://www.awakeusnow.com Watch the video from our website! https://www.awakeusnow.com/2-year-study-of-the-gospels-upper Watch the video from our YouTube Channel!! https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLTaaqrC3dMOzMkhPyiNWwlJRpV6Bwpu01 Up to Jerusalem is a study of the final weeks of Jesus' ministry. The earth shakes, concluding with His resurrection and ascension, using the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John together with material from ancient sources and recent discoveries. Up to Jerusalem is part five of our Two Year Study of the Gospels. Up To Jerusalem is the story of the plan of God to redeem the world, and the story of a Savior willing to obey the Father's plan. As we study Jesus' final days, we will be impacted as we discover the Love of God for each one of us.  This study is great for large group, small group or home group study and can be started at any time.

What did Jesus mean when He cried out, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" This piercing question, spoken from the cross, is one of the most profound and mysterious moments in Scripture. It reflects the depth of Christ's suffering, the inflexible justice of God, and the unfathomable love that led Jesus to become our substitute. In this message, Stephen Davey unpacks Matthew 27:45-49, exploring the significance of the supernatural darkness that covered the land and the meaning behind Jesus' anguished cry. You'll gain insight into the justice of God, the seriousness of sin, and the eternal hope found in Jesus Christ. This message is a sobering reminder of the cost of our salvation and an invitation to trust in the one who bore the punishment we deserve. If you've ever felt abandoned or asked God "why," this episode will encourage you to see Jesus as the ultimate answer to our deepest questions. Listen now to reflect on the love and sacrifice that changed history forever.

What did Jesus mean when He cried out, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" This piercing question, spoken from the cross, is one of the most profound and mysterious moments in Scripture. It reflects the depth of Christ's suffering, the inflexible justice of God, and the unfathomable love that led Jesus to become our substitute. In this message, Stephen Davey unpacks Matthew 27:45-49, exploring the significance of the supernatural darkness that covered the land and the meaning behind Jesus' anguished cry. You'll gain insight into the justice of God, the seriousness of sin, and the eternal hope found in Jesus Christ. This message is a sobering reminder of the cost of our salvation and an invitation to trust in the one who bore the punishment we deserve. If you've ever felt abandoned or asked God "why," this episode will encourage you to see Jesus as the ultimate answer to our deepest questions. Listen now to reflect on the love and sacrifice that changed history forever.

“My GOD the way this show delivers information…” We’ve got a lot to cover this week, starting with what’s quickly becoming our favorite kind of Night Vale episode: a Steve Carlsberg story! (Seriously, ten years ago we loved to hate him as much as Cecil did, now we think he’s practically the heart of Night... The post Binary System Podcast #461 – WTNV #269 “A Story About Me”, Love Death + Robots, Station Eleven, and Star Trek Lower Decks. first appeared on Pixelated Geek.

Thoughts on the neatness of religious art, what my process has been around learning to voice the honest emotional experience of life through poetry, and King David's model for creating spiritual art from a raw place within. Sources mentioned in this episode: Orthodoxy, Wealth, and Tackiness by Alex S. Ozar from Tradition, Spring 2025 Issue 57.2Psalm 22: "My God, my God, why have You forsaken me; why so far from delivering me and from my anguished roaring?...I cry by day, You do not answer.." * * * * * * *To inquire about sponsorship & advertising opportunities, please email us at info@humanandholy.com.To support our work, visit humanandholy.com/sponsor.Find us on Instagram @humanandholy & subscribe to our channel to stay up to date on all our upcoming conversations ✨Human & Holy podcast is available on all podcast streaming platforms. New episodes every Sunday & Wednesday on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and Google Podcasts.

  In this episode Diana interviews Tim Thomas, a veteran from Australia, who shares his experiences with breath work for stress management and healing. Tim recounts his military service, the abuse he faced due to his faith, and his mission to help soldiers who have attempted suicide. He elaborates on the transformative power of rest, overcoming PTSD, and breaking the isolation of trauma survivors. Tim's inspiring journey from a decorated soldier to a healer and advocate for veterans' mental health is both captivating and empowering.    https://breathworkinbed.com.au/ This link gives all listeners immediate access to improved sleep using the Breathwork in Bed App. Just hit the appropriate link for your phone and you'll get a 28 day free trial.   00:00 Introduction and Sponsor Message 00:47 Welcome to the Podcast 01:21 Introducing Tim Thomas 02:25 Tim's Background and Mission 05:50 Tim's Faith Journey 13:50 Military Experience and Challenges 22:05 Overcoming Isolation and Fatigue 27:08 Shark Attack Story 28:17 Conclusion and Next Episode Teaser   Bio:  Meet Tim Thomas—a man on a mission to transform lives and uplift the world, one night of quality sleep at a time. With over a decade of experience in the gritty, high-stakes world of veteran recovery, Tim brings an unparalleled depth of insight, forged through lived experiences in mental health, wellness, research, and breathwork. Alongside his team, he has raised over $1 million for impactful charities like the Gallipoli Medical Research Foundation, driving advancements in veteran health, and the Queensland Brain Institute, a global leader in neuroscience and mental health research. Tim's personal passion lies in helping people access the transformative power of rest and connection, showing how they fuel resilience, clarity, and fulfillment. He's not just a storyteller—he's a catalyst for change, inspiring audiences to unlock the hidden potential that comes with better sleep and a generous heart. Tim's energy is contagious, his insights are actionable, and his message will leave you empowered and excited. Get ready to hear stories that will captivate, strategies that inspire, and a perspective that will challenge everything you thought you knew about wellness. Let Tim take you on a journey you'll never forget.   Website: https://dswministries.org Email: diana@dswministries.org Subscribe to the podcast: https://dswministries.org/subscribe-to-podcast/ Social media links: Join our Private Wounds of the Faithful FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1603903730020136 Twitter: https://twitter.com/DswMinistries YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxgIpWVQCmjqog0PMK4khDw/playlists Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dswministries/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DSW-Ministries-230135337033879 Keep in touch with me! Email subscribe to get my handpicked list of the best resources for abuse survivors! https://thoughtful-composer-4268.ck.page #abuse #trauma Affiliate links: Our Sponsor: 753 Academy: https://www.753academy.com/ Can't travel to The Holy Land right now? The next best thing is Walking The Bible Lands! Get a free video sample of the Bible lands here! https://www.walkingthebiblelands.com/a/18410/hN8u6LQP An easy way to help my ministry: https://dswministries.org/product/buy-me-a-cup-of-tea/ A donation link: https://dswministries.org/donate/   Tim Thomas Part 1 [00:00:00] Welcome to the Wounds of the Faithful Podcast, brought to you by DSW Ministries. Your host is singer songwriter, speaker and domestic violence advocate, Diana Winkler. She is passionate about helping survivors in the church heal from domestic violence and abuse and trauma. This podcast is not a substitute for professional counseling or qualified medical help. Now here is Diana. Hey everyone. Welcome back to the podcast. So glad to have you with me today. We have a great episode for you and this one will be from down under. We've had some, friends on the podcast from Australia, and so today we also have a guest from Australia, Tim Thomas. We are going to talk about breath work and how that helps with stress management and healing. I myself have [00:01:00] done some breath work with my psychiatrist, and believe it or not, it has really helped me. So I'm really intrigued about hearing what he has to say about breath work. But he is also gonna tell his story about being in the military in Australia and how he suffered abuse for his faith and what he did, to overcome that. And we'll talk about his, work he's doing, to help, soldiers who have attempted suicide, which that is really, really amazing to save lives like that. I'm gonna read you a little bit about his bio. Meet Tim Thomas, A man on a mission to transform lives and uplift the world, one night of quality sleep at a time. With over a decade of experience in the gritty, high stakes world of veteran recovery. Tim brings an unparalleled depth of insight forged through lived [00:02:00] experiences in mental health, wellness, research, and breath work. Alongside his team, he has raised over 1 million or impact charities like the Gallipoli Medical Research Foundation, driving advancements in veteran health and the Queensland Brain Institute, a global leader in neuroscience and mental health research. Tim's personal passion lies in helping people access the transformative power of rest and connection, showing how they fuel resilience, clarity, and fulfillment. He's not only a storyteller. He's a catalyst for change, inspiring audiences to unlock the hidden potential that comes with better sleep and a generous heart . Who doesn't need more sleep, right? Tim's energy is contagious, i'll tell you. His message will leave you empowered and excited. So get ready to hear some stories that will captivate and strategies that are going [00:03:00] to inspire. A perspective that will change everything you thought you knew about wellness. So here we go. Please welcome my guest today, Tim Thomas. Alright, welcome Tim Thomas to the show from down under and it's, uh, 11 o'clock tomorrow over there. Yep. This is coming to you live from the future. Or time travelers. So, we've had a couple guests from Australia and tell us what is a thing about Australia that maybe is a myth or something that isn't true? What, yeah, sure. Okay. So you guys have, uh, Thanksgiving Uhhuh where you, where you carve up the, the Turkey. We have Thanksgiving here as well, but we carve up a kangaroo. Really? I didn't know that. No, you don't. What do you serve with it? Oh, you don't? Oh, you're joking. I'm just, I'm just kidding you. Oh, you see my [00:04:00] eyeballs go really big. No, they're, they're too hard to catch. Yeah, I, I venture that. People think that, you know, crocodiles live in your backyard and, you have kangaroos as pets, but that's not true. Is it? No, although I was fortunate enough to grow up with my father working with the Aboriginals, and so, eating kangaroos, eating, anything that crawled or, walked on the ground was part of my, uh, diet growing up. Yeah, my dad actually worked in the church, with the indigenous, in some very low socioeconomic, circumstances. There's on the YouTube, there's those clips called Restoring Faith in Humanity, where there's these acts of kindness to people that could, you know, never potentially repay it. But that was just my day to day seeing my parents and their sincere, service, going beyond any sort of physical restraint. The older I get, the more I [00:05:00] appreciate it. I like that. Tell us how you came to know the Lord. What was your spiritual background? You mentioned your, family in the ministry. How did you know, Jesus personally? What did that look like for you? Well, having a faith based background, you think, you know, going to church every week, Sunday school, my father was the pastor, uh, that I would have a faith and I did, but I feel like it was someone else's. I didn't really own it. And the thing is, there's no bottom to the depth of the relationship. So I'm always finding this new depth of relationship, which makes the old relationship redundant. You know, letting the old self die. What you once clinging to and almost to find yourself with, you've gotta literally let that die and allow yourself to, to be transformed. And I've had, uh, quite a few deepening transformative experiences, most of which come out of, uh, [00:06:00] getting in some way, shape, or form broken. And there was something that happened. So my background is, I was a professional fighter, in the early mixed martial arts scene, which was, no rules fighting is what they called it back in the nineties. Mm-hmm. Uh, I joined the special forces and. Before you go on deployment, they get you to write a letter to your loved ones, uh, in case you die. And that was very confronting for a lot of guys. So you coming up against, you know, fear of death, uh, and, and fear in general, right? Mm-hmm. And I thought, well, there was only one time in the Bible where Jesus was afraid, and that was in the garden of Gethsemane. And he wasn't just a little scared. He was so scared he was bleeding blood. and I started thinking, why was he so scared? Why was he so fearful? And I'm like, it can't be for any fear of physical pain because I. I know guys, I can just flick [00:07:00] a switch and they can control their physical pain. And, and I'm sure he had that ability, he had power over his physical body. And I started thinking, what Jesus was really afraid about was that when he was on that cross and he was bearing our sins, he couldn't be with God. So this bond that had been there since the beginning of time, for the first time ever was actually severed. Mm-hmm. And Jesus, for the first time ever in his, in the in, since the beginning of conceivable time, he was alone. He was completely alone. So yes, he experienced everything that us humans experienced while he was here, but he did something that none of us, I. need to experience, and that is separation from God. Yeah. So when he was on that cross, that was Easter is a time of loneliness. My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? You know that, it's a bit like, you've got a child, you just put 'em outta the car and drive off. There's no physical harm being done, but those golden threads get severed. So, because I saw that, [00:08:00] because Jesus experienced separation from God, we never have to, and it doesn't matter if I'm alive or I'm dead, I'm doing well, I'm doing poorly. Nothing's gonna separate us because of Jesus experiencing that separation for us. And I, I completely lost my fear of death, um, to the point where I literally had fun with it, you know? Um, I remember guy saying, Tommo, you're not supposed to be having so much fun. But, that was my detachment from, from any fear because I, I realized that nothing could separate us. Oh, I Amen. To that. Wow. So when was your faith real to you? Was there a, a particular event that happened in your life, or? Well, to be honest, I have played in both realms. You might call it the woowoo, energy, whatever you wanna call it, um, new age. But there are some principles that they have in there and they talk about, uh, lower energy frequencies or what we would call in the Christian faith sins, you know? Mm-hmm. Fear, anger, hatred, you [00:09:00] know, lower energy frequencies. And if you are stuck in those frequencies, then you can't transcend to the higher connection with the divine, and then the difference between, your lower energies and your higher energies is courage. And as a Christian you'd say letting the old self die, that which you are familiar with. Okay? I always know Tim, as this particular type of person, this is what I do. This is what I think, this is how I react. And so to. To let go of that and to let that self die. And it is essentially a death, takes a lot of courage to step into the unknown. It's that leap of faith, catch me, Jesus. And, so I found it very useful to use the, technical breakdown in the sort of woowoo space to help me access the sins that I've been hanging onto. All the poison I'd been drinking to try and help hurt [00:10:00] other people. And I'm sure I was still saved by grace, but to, I think we naturally connect with God provided the blockages are removed. But we tend to hang onto these blockages. We hang onto to that which we are familiar with. I was very familiar with going, that person wronged me and I'm angry, so I want revenge. Or I might say I forgive them in my head. And yeah. But that just means that, I've cut them outta my life and I hope God punishes them some way somehow. You know? Yeah. That's not really connecting to something higher. And the way I sort of saw it was, you can draw these wrongs or sins closer to you. Uh, and so, my pathway to a living, breathing, active relationship with God and the divine, has me understanding that it does start in this physical space. It does start with me getting forgiveness for the things that have me in fear, shame, guilt. So, I'm a big fan of breath work and if you wanna look at it from the parable of, the [00:11:00] king giving his servant talents, pieces of gold, do something with it. And then when I return , I'll see what you've done with it. So inside of us is this, let's just say gold. And my experience of my true connection with the divine is he's given me this bag of meat around this wondrous, gold. And when this bag of meat does what I've been put here to do, it's like, it lines up to, to amplify the gold that's inside of me. And that's unique to each individual. Some people get it through playing music, some people get it, with exercise, some people, me, it was combat. I have to be honest. I feel like God put me here to do the things I was made to do. Ah, when, I believe, you're on, purpose. When energy's like money, how you invest, it's how you get it back. And when you are doing the thing that you felt you've been put here to do, you get an incredible reward. So when I started tapping into, getting rid [00:12:00] of the sin, the lower energy stuff and getting into the divine, uh, that's when it became like a daily loving, abundant. I have to reconnect, realign, and, to get that power, get that abundance. We get lost. We get lost in what we can see. We're a very visual society, so we're only looking at what we can see and, what is unseen is what's, super powerful. That's the stuff that I tend to lean into because, and I don't think we say this loudly enough. A man's happiness and generosity is relative to how powerful he feels. 'cause if you wanna see an unhappy stingy guy, I they're not feeling powerful. And I believe that starts with us. So I tell my son, our power starts with us. Um, I hope that lands, so you've probably heard the phrase, you are a soul. You have a body. You heard that before? Yep. Yep. And so a lot of people, they mix it up as they have a body and my soul's here just for the ride. It's, no, we are a soul. We are spiritual. And, yeah. I think, [00:13:00] folks can relate to what you've been saying. You, mentioned your military experience in Australia. Now I'm familiar with American military 'cause I come from a military family. Uh, but what is it like in Australia? Are there any differences? What is it like being a soldier there? Well, I would say it's, I've worked with some of the US troops, and to be honest, I didn't see there was too much difference. Of course as Australians, we'd just say we're much tougher than the US troops. But, but no, I work with some really, switched on guys from the us the Navy Seals in their special forces of selection, they got a hell week. In the Australian Commandos, we have a hell 28 days. Oh, okay. So something similar. And, you mentioned that you had gone through some abuse because of your faith. Was that connected to your military service or in, other areas of your lives? Well, I will caveat this. I struggled with military, [00:14:00] culture and I was always trying to figure it out. So I was always asking questions and, asking questions was probably not encouraged, but I always did it. Uh, so I was always that guy. So insecure alpha males always need someone to, you know, kick sand in the face of, 'cause that to them there's only so much energy in the room, so they have to take it, um, from someone else. And. there was a drinking culture there hanging out with the boys. You know, I had a young family. I didn't hang out with them. And I also had a Christian faith. And I remember there was one particular sergeant that, really tried to break me. Mm-hmm. And the thing is, my physical body, you can't break. You know, my, my mind, you can't break. I'm too tough. You know, I'm connected to something so powerful. but then something happened that I didn't expect. He managed to attack the people I cared mostly about. So I was on deployment and I made a promise to my then wife. I call her my then wife, not my ex-wife. 'cause I, I stand for a positive future. and I promised my then wife that I'd write her a letter every day. And this particular [00:15:00] sergeant, , said, um, you, that's a security risk. We want to take your laptop off you. Now, my wife had given birth, uh, to our second born two weeks before deployment. Mm-hmm. And I had all the pictures of my wife giving birth, my kids in the bath on this hard drive. Mm mm-hmm. And he took the hard drive and he put it on the, the army's equivalent of the internet so anyone could see it. And I'd never been in a situation where the people I cared about most was used against me like that, you know? And obviously that freaked my then wife out, you know, and she was scared that her milk will dry up. She was so stressed. And now then that then of course freaked me the hell out, and so I'd never been. Like, I got a, armor of God man, but it was like a knife got un underneath under all of it hit my heart and I just bled out. and I, I literally, in this lucid state, I saw a bird fly out from inside of me, just jump around in a rock and then fly off. And I'm like, what is [00:16:00] that? And I was later to realize that was the bluebird of happiness leaving me, and for about a decade there, 'cause, and when I went back to Australia and I, and you know, they decompress you with psychological stuff and, and I shared that the psychologist re reacted how you react and said, that is so wrong. Right? Yeah. Um, and so I put in what's called a an ROG redress of grievance. That's when the second layer of abuse started happening, because what the army is particularly good at is if you challenge rank, and I was just a private Okay. Nothing, nobody, oh, you know? Right. So, so they all thought, well, he's an external threat. Let's all bond together and, and screw this guy over a second time. So on every level, people who are really friendly then just treated me like I was invisible. No one would talk to me on base, yeah, I was kind of dead inside for the longest time, and, it really impacted my relationship with my then wife. Um, I was, it was the classic term where my [00:17:00] husband came back from deployment a different man, you know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Um, Out of all that because I'm, I'm the toughest guy I know, right? Yeah. No, no one can break me. But the thing is, God put me in that place because it's not so much what we do that gives us value to others. It's what we've come through. And, and I had to go through that so I could actually have a heart having empathy for other people needing healing. You know, I was one of those tough guys that, if you couldn't handle it, bugger off mate. You can't handle it. Get out. There is a time and a place for that. There is a time and a place. I think this country is made great by that, but it's not the only option that, that is in your tool belt. What I didn't know was that when I got out, something happened when I got out. So in 2011, I think it was April. And this is just a true story. So I, I'd reached rock bottom. Well, long story short, I was about to kill a man. The Australian government wasn't paying me. Uh, this is gonna be murder. Mm-hmm. [00:18:00] Um, I'd, I'd reach rock bottom. PSDI didn't even know I had, I just had to drink half a car and a grog every night before I spoke to my then wife. Family was going to hell. what do you do when you're experiencing something you've never experienced before? And you need help or you see a psychologist? And that was such a strange concept for me, Diana, because I'm hurting and I've gotta go speak to a stranger. How does that make sense? I don't know this guy. I don't trust him. So I am completely triggered just driving in there, right? And after I told him all I saw in service, all the abuse, this guy wasn't just incompetent. Incompetency I can handle. This guy was apathetic. And at the end he's like, oh, so you think it was a problem with your mom and dad? And, and everything in the room just froze. And I saw he had a glass framed, you know, psychology degree behind him. And it made a lot of sense to grab that and feed it to him because he was a healer and he was supposed to be healing people, but he wasn't just not healing people, he was harming people. And in my state of [00:19:00] disconnection it made sense to do that. So I get outta my chair to do it. And this, this is really real, right? But then I felt this hand on my chest saying, red flag, Tim, you're the toughest guy. You know how many other guys are struggling in a, in this system that doesn't seem to care or want you to get better? And that's when I sat back down, Diana. And then I saw them, I saw all these people left and right of me just willing me on saying, you know, Tim, if you can find a way forward for you, you can find a way forward for us. And, and I really need people who are listening to this to draw this question to them. ' cause I didn't just go through that for myself. All right, there's a spirit at work here. Everyone's up against something. And the the golden question I asked, I invite everyone to ask, and that is how many other people are in your situation right now? And that, that's a real question. Give it a real number. And, and when I looked to my left and my right, there was no depth of people in my space. And I thought, well, look. It doesn't [00:20:00] matter if it takes me a week, a month, a year, a decade, I've gotta find a way forward. 'cause if I can find a way forward for me, I can find a way forward for them. And if it takes me a decade, I'm pretty sure that's the amount of time I'm gonna be able to save these people. And I was pretty sure that at some point in the future there's gonna be people that possibly haven't even met yet. Really glad I made a decision to move forward positively as opposed to going to jail. I understand that you saved, what, 17 people from committing suicide? Uh, I, I stopped counting at over 40. Oh, well that's even better. Um, I'd certainly like to hear more , about that. Okay. So my lifetime goal was to say, 'cause we've lost about 40 troops to bombs and bullets in Afghanistan, in Australia. But we've lost 30 or 40 times that amount to suicide. And so I had this goal in my head that if I can, save, 40 guys from suicide, I'll die a happy man. I don't care if it takes the rest of my life. This is what I wanna do. and I had no qualifications, but God had prepared me for this. So I'm [00:21:00] dyslexic. I, failed high school, but I could see patterns. And the pattern I saw happening is, is something that the mainstream spreadsheet never saw. And that was this. And these two things enabled me to save those 40 guys within a year. All right, so this is, this is powerful stuff that I'm showing. I need everyone to listen to this. It doesn't matter if the pain's physical or emotional for us humans, it'll get to a certain duration or intensity that it transforms from just pain into loneliness and isolation. And when we're all alone, when we're feeling isolated, all sorts of crazy crap. It can be justifiable. I was about to kill a man, and that was justifiable in my isolated state, but my isolation was broken. When I asked the question, how many other people are going through this? So I saw that, of all the millions of dollars of resources that get poured into veteran, it's all water off a duck's back if you're not breaking the isolation. And it's as simple as understanding that, especially for us guys [00:22:00] when we experience trauma. Yeah, we want to talk about it, but we are waiting for another, especially we need another bloke who has walked the same path to speak the unspoken words inside our hearts. So we've got these unspoken words that we can't speak ourselves, that we need to hear another guy who's walked that path. Speak, and then all of a sudden the jaw pops open. And I can't say what they normally say, but let's just say they say things like, gee whiz, I thought I was the only one going through this. Exactly. So, so breaking the isolation is the first step that it cannot and should not stay there. Uh, a lot of people get stuck in the feel goods of breaking the isolation. Oh, I'm not the only one going through this. Right? And veterans are really good at forming these anti-social social groups where, oh, look, we've broken our isolation, but I can only be myself around these people, and I'm only around them for one hour a week. You know, for the other times, I have to sort of go back [00:23:00] in my shell, right? Mm-hmm. So, yes, breaking the isolation's the first point, but it can't stop there. The next point that needs to be, uh, addressed is the plain and simple fatigue. I'm alone and isolated. I'm the only one that's got my back. I can't drop my guard for a second. Everything's a threat. 'cause everything is a threat. So I'm not sleeping, if I drop my guard, something bad's gonna happen. It's gonna be my fault. And it's this loop and it just becomes normal. Not sleeping, being hypervigilant, drinking lots of alcohol, lots of substances. And I made the mistake of telling the doctor I couldn't sleep and I lost six years of my life to pills, and initially i'm like, this is great long service, leaving a bottle. But no one tells you the cost of taking them. Yes, there's a benefit, but there's a massive cost. You get something, but it takes something from you. Mm-hmm. I lost a lot of memories. That's kind of a, a real gray patch in my life. Those six years I was on all these pills and I'm pretty sure I lost a bunch of memories from before that. So I. There's a time and a place for pills. They're [00:24:00] sometimes are lesser of two evils, but no one tells you the cost and especially nobody tells you just how hard it is to come off these things. Mm-hmm. You know, if you wanna feel like a minute, turns into an hour, be in the kind of pain that the withdrawals put through your system. I, I nearly went completely insane coming off of these things. So point I'm trying to make here is the two things I did that say 40 guys within, um, a year, and then I stopped counting, was breaking the isolation. And I want all the listeners to understand that what you are up against when you come through that, that gives you the qualification to break the isolation of other people going through it. You know, my pathway was a veteran, but it could be breast cancer, it could be a relationship, it could be anything. Whatever you're up against, you get through that. Live the life you wanna live. That gives you the qualification to break the isolation. Now, you might not say anything that that person hasn't heard before, but coming from you and your lived experience, you can put that from their head [00:25:00] into their heart, into their soul spirit. And then they get a chance to start making powerful choices, in a place of connection. And then getting them out of fatigue was where, when they gave me a bunch of pills, I didn't know breath work was something that could alkalize my neural pathways, turn my overthinking head off, give my body peace, give my body healing. It is the piece that transcends all human understandings. And I, and I don't just wanna talk about this there, there'll be a time at the end of this podcast where we'll have a lived experience of this. those 40 lives were saved by two simple PR principles that aren't addressed. Breaking the isolation, through authentically spoken words. I've got six pages of weapons I'm qualified in, but the most powerful thing I own is the authenticity in the words coming outta my mouth. That literally changes the axis of the world. And then getting people out of fatigue because people have 98% of everything they need inside of them. But if they're feeling [00:26:00] alone, if they're feeling fatigued, they can't access their own resources. But when their isolation is broken and they're out of fatigue, it's like their inner compass just turns on and it, and they, they know where they need to go. And it's just, it's, it's amazing how little people need when they get exactly what they want. Um, yeah, definitely. You know, I know there's a shark story somewhere. How does the shark come into play with, is that, just something you survived or is that. Oh, look, that was a fun NBE near death experience where, um, okay. Yeah. Very relevant. It was the classic one where you have your life flashing before your eyes. Right. Um, and the important part about this isn't so much the shark attack in the, in the context of a, a, let's say Christian faith afterwards, because I, I love the ocean, I love spearfishing. And there's always sharks where there's fish when we're chasing fish. There's, it's always a good sign when there's sharks around because that tells you you're in the right area. [00:27:00] And it's a fun story. Like this thing had my leg, and I don't believe it when people say, oh, I punched it and then it went away. I'm stabbing this thing in the eye and it's not letting go. And I'm about to drown, right? As a fighter, I've taken a lot of hits, but never, ever, ever has my body felt like a ragdoll being shaken by a dog. Mm-hmm. Um, so I literally felt that my body going, oh yeah, yeah. Like just so rapidly shook. I'm like, whoa. This is a great place to stop and continue. Next time on the podcast, I know that you'll wanna hear the rest of his story and what helpful things does he have for us to better our health and and handle the stress and heal from our trauma. So [00:28:00] thanks for listening today. I wish you a great week, and we'll see you back next time on the Wounds of The Faithful Podcast.  

How much loss and how many setbacks can one experience before they call it quits? Or, perhaps more importantly, how can one keep going when anxiety feels overwhelming, naysayers chip away at your confidence, and the road ahead feels vague and unclear? Chris Rhoman from Sanctus Real and his band wrestled with these concerns and more when they found themselves at a Crossroads between calling it quits and trusting God to do a new thing, proving the truth in their song titled My God is Still the Same. In this episode, Chris shares how God led him through a season of panic attacks and intense anxiety, losing the band's lead singer and record label, to rising again with the strength, focus, and passion that can only come from the Holy Spirit at work within and through us. Discussion/Reflective questions: What most resonated resonated with you in this episode? In this episode, Chris shared the numerous contributing factors to his season of intense anxiety and panic attacks. How might it be helpful, when experiencing anxiety, to consider the mental and emotional weight of all the various stressors, changes, and emotions we experience? Chris shared how some of his anxiety may have stemmed from the grief he experienced in losing the band's lead singer. If you experience anxiety, how might unresolved grief (over a person, relationship, dream, etc) be contributing to your inner turmoil? Chris also discussed how he had to ignore the voices of naysayers and tune in to the voice of Christ. What might this look like in your life? Chris shared how he found the words of a friend during a particularly difficult time encouraging. Who in your life speaks truth into your soul when you feel overwhelmed, uncertain, or discouraged? What is one action step God might be inviting you to take having listened to this podcast episode? Find Sanctus Real: On their website On spotify On Instagram On Facebook Find Jennifer Slattery: On her website Instagram Facebook Amazon Subscribe to her free newsletter Join the private Faith Over Fear Facebook Group (Inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

MY God!!!!

My God is Real! | Hebrews 11:6 | 8 June 2025 - Sunday Morning | Dr. Brad Weniger, Pastor

Matthew 18:21-22 NIV21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.Betrayal refers to the breaking of trust, loyalty, or confidence by someone close or entrusted with responsibility. It involves a breach of expectations, often resulting in feelings of anger, sadness, confusion, and vulnerability. Betrayal can manifest in various forms, including infidelity, deceit, disloyalty, abandonment, and betrayal of secrets or confidences.1. Jesus was Betrayed by Judas  Matthew 26:50 NIV50 Jesus replied, “Do what you came for, friend.” Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested him.Matthew 16:23 — 23 Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”John 12:6 NIVHe did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.Matthew 27:38 KJV38 Then were there two thieves crucified with him, one on the right hand, and another on the left.If the enemy can't stop you + your purpose he will stall you with pain to prevent purpose.2. Jesus was Beat by others who hated him.3. Jesus Bled in front of everyone. Jesus Acknowledged His Pain.Matthew 27:46 NIV46 About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”)Note: You can't heal what you won't feel and you can't feel what you won't admit. 2. Jesus Pray for those who hurt Him.Mathew 5:43-45 — 43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44 But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, 45 that you may be sons of your Father in heaven…The command to pray for your enemies isn't about them— Its spiritual conditioning so your heart doesn't calcify. 3. Jesus Forgave. Luke 23:34 NIV — 34 Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.Can you receive the blood of Jesus as full and satisfactory payment for what they did to you? 

Up To Jerusalem - Teaching 17 Scripture: Luke 23:26-34, Mark 15:21, Hosea 10:8, John 19:19-27, Mark 15:29-32, Luke 23:39-43, Matthew 27:45-49, Psalm 22, John 19:28-30., Luke 23:46, Psalm 31:5, Matthew 27:50-54. Today we take a look at a moving, powerful and emotionally packed teaching on the subject of Jesus' crucifixion.  We will explore the accounts of Jesus' crucifixion using all four gospels as each gives us unique details and special insights. Jesus' crucifixion was painful, prolonged, humiliating and demeaning, but the four gospel writers do not dwell on the sufferings of Jesus. What they dwell on is what He won for us and what He offers to each of us. Our story opens with Jesus' walk to Golgotha (Hebrew word - translates to “Place of the Skull” - Calvary - is the Latin word for ‘Place of the Skull.”) As Jesus was brutally beaten, tortured and whipped He is exhausted, weak, in great pain and unable to carry His cross to Golgotha, so Simon of Cyrene is forced to carry Jesus' cross. Jesus' first words from the cross were “Father, forgive them, they don't know what they are doing.” A display of His love even from the cross, even in extreme suffering and incredible pain, He cries out on behalf of others. Don't ever doubt God's love. No matter how we've fallen, our God loves us dearly! The enemy likes to make us think that God is the bad guy, but the truth is - if you want to know what God is like and want to know how He feels about you, then all you have to do is look at Jesus, the One who is the visible image of the invisible God - and He says, Father, forgive them.” He offers mercy to all of us - we all are sinners and we all need a Savior and that's who Jesus is! Our story continues with Pilate making a sign in 3 languages: Hebrew, Latin and Greek. The sign says, “King of the Jews.” The way Romans announced the crime for which the individual was being executed was to post it over their heads on their cross. When Pilate had the sign placed above Jesus' head the Chief Priests became upset. Pastor takes time to dig into some truly interesting insights into why the sign made them so angry. The next words Jesus says are to His mother and the disciple next to her at the foot of His cross. He says, “Woman, here is your son.” And to the disciple He says, “Here is your mother.” Jesus' second set of words from the cross were again for others and of showing his deep love and concern for His mother. Jesus was crucified between two criminals, one of them joins the crowd in mocking Jesus. The one not joining the crowd says to the one that was, “Don't you fear God? This man has done nothing wrong,..” Then turning to Jesus he says, “Jesus, remember me when You come into Your kingdom.” Jesus replies, “I tell you, today you will be with Me in paradise.” This criminal displays great faith in asking, Jesus, who is beaten, brutalized and nailed to a cross, “Remember me!” This man saw what is unseen - He saw into heaven. He saw what is true.  Again Jesus' words are for others, these comforting words of promise given this man hanging on the cross next to Him. The promise is for all those who believe in Him, that we will be with Him and we will see His kingdom in all its glory and fulfillment. As we continue with the story, darkness came over the land in the middle of the day and Jesus cries out, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” Jesus endured the judgement of God for us - He became sin for us. Pastor talks about these very words of being forsaken having been written in Psalm 22, 1000 years earlier, and they were words that every Jew was familiar with. Pastor shares how that would have impacted those around Him hearing Him say these words - they were a testimony to who Jesus is! Then Jesus says, “I am thirsty.” And He is offered wine vinegar on a sponge on the end of a hyssop stalk. Pastor shares insight into this prophetic action of using the hyssop stalk being lifted to Jesus to drink from.  When Jesus had the drink, He said, “It is finished.” Meaning PAID IN FULL. The debt for sin was paid. The price for our salvation has been paid in full. Jesus drank the cup of the wrath of God, He is the sacrificial victim - the Real Passover Lamb, who offered up His blood for us all and His blood covers our sin. And then Jesus' speaks, “Father, into Your hand I commit My Spirit.” And He dies.     ⁃    The price is paid     ⁃    The battle is won     ⁃    The victory is assured At Jesus' last words the curtain of the Temple is torn in two. Why?… This was a massive curtain that separated the Holy Place from the Holy of Holies where a High Priest went once a year before God making atonement for the sins of the people. Now all of a sudden people, not just the High Priests can look into the Holy of Holies and have access to the Living God. God dealt with human sin in the very Person of His own Son. The curtain is now open and the way to the Father is exposed - all are given access into the place where only a High Priest could go because Jesus open it through His sacrifice on the cross. Our time together ends with the words of the centurion guarding Jesus on the cross as the day turned dark, as the curtain tore, as the earth shook, rocks split and people walked out of tombs, the centurion exclaims, “Surely, He was the Son of God!” What a shocking day this was!  This was the day the Savior gave His life for all! And it changed everything because now - He offers life to all who believe in Him. Join us next time as we discover that Jesus is our Victor! Our website – https://www.awakeusnow.com Watch the video from our website! https://www.awakeusnow.com/2-year-study-of-the-gospels-upper Watch the video from our YouTube Channel!! https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLTaaqrC3dMOzMkhPyiNWwlJRpV6Bwpu01 Up to Jerusalem is a study of the final weeks of Jesus' ministry. The earth shakes concluding with His resurrection and ascension, using the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John together with material from ancient sources and recent discoveries. Up to Jerusalem is part five of our Two Year Study of the Gospels. Up To Jerusalem is the story of the plan of God to redeem the world, and the story of a Savior willing to obey the Father's plan. As we study Jesus' final days, we will be impacted as we discover the Love of God for each one of us.  This study is great for large group, small group or home group study and can be started at any time.

What do you do when your world feels like it’s caving in? Jennifer Slattery brings us face-to-face with a powerful moment in David’s life where everything was falling apart—and yet, he found strength not in strategy, but in God. In today’s devotional, we explore what it means to “strengthen ourselves in the Lord,” and how to follow David’s example in our own moments of fear, anxiety, and deep distress.