Podcasts about gay men

What starts as a discussion about age gaps in relationships quickly evolves into a deeper debate about influence, consent, friendship, and the responsibilities we have when someone clearly tells us who they are and what they want. Along the way, Jay, Torrian, and Chef Von unpack the challenges of loneliness in the Black LGBTQ+ community, whether power can exist beyond age, and where the line is between genuine connection and manipulation. As always, the conversation gets passionate, personal, and a little messy, but it leaves plenty for listeners to think about. Join the conversation and leave us a voicemail at 213-349-8220 Follow us on all social media platforms  IG - @catchmyblackandgay  Twitter- @catchmyblackgay  Website: https://catchmyblackandgay.com

Many gay men prepare financially for retirement, yet still feel uncertain about what they are retiring into. Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores the "blueprint gap": reaching later life without an inherited picture of what a satisfying retirement should contain. Traditional retirement narratives often assume children, grandchildren, lifelong heterosexual marriage, and an extended family prepared to provide companionship and care—assumptions that may never have applied to gay men. This episode examines retirement identity, chosen family, purpose after work, financial security, LGBTQ+-affirming long-term care, and the AIDS-era loss of elders who might have modeled aging for subsequent generations. Ken offers reflective questions and practical ways to begin building a later life around connection, creativity, community, safety, and personal meaning.

This episode of The Wild Podcast features hosts Brandon Cardoso, Julian Barboza, Parker Reid, and Kyle Jacobs, with special guest Justin Laid joining the conversation. They engage in candid, humorous, and personal discussions about their experiences at the Hard Summer music festival, content creation on platforms like TikTok and Blue Page, personal lifestyle topics, and navigating social life as young creators. The group discusses viral moments and interview highlights, including a notorious clip involving an armpit licking incident that garnered over 10 million views.

Seeking validation isn't just about chasing likes. It's the part of us that needs approval, wants to belong, and feel accepted. But does it come at a cost? In this episode, we unpack the subtle ways validation-seeking still shows up in our everyday lives, especially as gay men who learned early to scan, adapt, perform, and manage how we're perceived. We talk about the difference between healthy feedback and outsourcing your self-worth, and what it actually looks like to build self-trust in real life. In this episode, we discuss: What validation-seeking actually looks like The difference between caring what people think and letting their opinion become a verdict on your worth Why self-trust requires tolerating discomfort, disappointment, and disapproval How we're each still learning to come back to ourselves in more honest, grounded ways Self-trust doesn't mean you stop caring what people think- it means their reaction no longer gets to decide who you are. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Coming Home To Yourself(00:01:56) - Why Do Gay Men Seek Validation?(00:03:43) - What Does Validation Seeking Actually Look Like?(00:05:51) - What Does It Look Like to Be Overcomfortable?(00:07:20) - Michael Buble on Being Validated(00:07:57) - Michael Says He Feels Good About Himself(00:08:45) - Validation Seeking and How It Affects Your Life(00:13:53) - How to Stop Seeking External Validation(00:18:10) - What does validation seeking look like in your life?(00:18:35) - Why Is Self-Trust So Difficult For Gay People?(00:23:26) - "People Plead"(00:27:58) - What Makes Self Trust So Difficult?(00:31:43) - The Importance Of Identity(00:33:28) - Self-Trust Coaching(00:34:08) - Michael on Coming Home To Himself(00:35:38) - What Would I Do If I Wasn't Trying To Be Like(00:39:35) - Coming Home to Yourself(00:43:20) - Getting Back Home to Yourself(00:46:26) - Why I Don't Need To Explain My Time(00:48:06) - Coming Back Home To Yourself

What began as affectionate nostalgia, remembering the men who taught them gay culture, the language, how to navigate the lifestyle — gradually unfolds into a heavier realization. With the hindsight of adulthood and therapy, we come to name what they experienced for what it was: grooming! Join the conversation and leave us a voicemail at 213-349-8220 Follow us on all social media platforms  IG - @catchmyblackandgay  Twitter- @catchmyblackgay  Website: https://catchmyblackandgay.com

Follow Andrew Akuruka on IG: https://www.instagram.com/boss_of_pnk/?hl=enBuy ‘The Gay Blueprint': https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1067665617Watch videos early, totally ad-free and uncensored! If you're a fan of All Out you can become an All Out Insider by subscribing to our Substack. Head to: https://substack.com/@jondeanallout

In Chinese society, a society particularly concerned with family, being a gay man can be particularly hard. The pressure is so great for gay men to have wives and children, that many of them choose to say in the closet throughout their entire lives. And it's certainly difficult for them, it's also difficult for their wives. In this lesson, two women discuss this social issue. Episode link: https://www.chinesepod.com/2103

In Part 2 of Five Love Languages Reimagined for Gay Men, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST explores why receiving gifts and physical touch can mean far more than they seem. Gifts may communicate that your partner stayed in your mind; touch can offer comfort, safety, and belonging without needing to lead to sex. Ken connects these everyday moments to attachment, the histories gay men bring into relationships, and a central question for couples: does the way I'm loving you actually feel like love to you?

His father rejected him. His grandmother changed everything. Brad Ryan spent seven and a half years driving across America with his 85-year-old grandmother, visiting all 63 national parks, and quietly healing the wounds his coming out left behind. What started as an adventure became something neither of them expected: a reckoning with family, identity, and the stories gay men tell themselves about who will ever truly accept them. Brad joins Rick to talk about what happens when you stop waiting for the people who hurt you and start showing up for the ones who show up for you. Key Takeaways: Why Brad didn't come out until college and what his father's reaction cost himHow a camping trip in the Smoky Mountains became the turning point with his grandmotherWhy gay men build elaborate stories about rejection that don't match realityWhat intergenerational connection offers gay men that their own community often can'tHow curiosity instead of judgment transforms even the most broken family relationshipsWhy healing doesn't always look like confrontation — sometimes it looks like a road trip About Brad Brad Ryan is a veterinarian, wildlife conservationist, social media influencer, and writer from southeastern Ohio. He earned his BA from Miami University in Ohio, an MSc in mammalian biology from the University of Pretoria in South Africa, and a DVM/MPH combined degree from The Ohio State University, specializing in wildlife medicine and veterinary public health. For Brad, storytelling is a vehicle for healing—rooted in empathy, inspired by nature, and driven by a desire to help others feel seen and connected. As a keynote speaker, he champions LGBTQ+ inclusion in the outdoors, eliminating stigma around mental health, and the protection of wildlife Connect With Brad Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Send us Fan MailThe episode discusses a recent trend I have noticed while scrolling through social media: a specific group of gay people—mostly cisgender white gay men—publicly stating “I support Trump.” #GayPolitics #Trump #LGBTQ #GayMen #Cisgender #SocialMedia #WhiteGayMen #PoliticsSupport the show

In this episode: Why summer makes gay men feel more sexual and adventurous Naked beaches and the freedom of being seen Cruising in Central Park's Ramble Curiosity about sex parties and group experiences Shirtless confidence versus body anxiety Working out for yourself versus working out for validation Queer spaces, community, and spontaneous connection Knowing your boundaries while still allowing yourself to explore Whether our “feral” selves might actually be our most honest selves Hot Topic: Love for Berlin when a van killed and injured many at the Pride festival... Hot Topic: Would you get a butt facial? Hot Topic: Adult performer Derek Kage turns down a collab with Dirk Dawson but not with Dawson's husband.... Hot Topic: Have you heard of 'gym penis'? Hot Topic: Neighbors are trying to shut down Denny Blaine Park nude beach in Seattle, Washington ... Advice: where do you rank on the hotness scale when hooking up? A guy who is new to the scene wonders.... Follow Steve V's new Substack features weekly articles: https://substack.com/@thenakedtruthsteve Follow Stevie on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The five love languages can be useful—but for gay men, they often carry deeper psychological meaning. In Part 1 of this two-part episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, reimagines the familiar framework through the lived experiences of gay men. He explores why words of affirmation can be about being seen, why acts of service can become a way of earning closeness, and why quality time is less about hours together than genuine emotional presence. The deeper question is not simply how we express love. It's why certain expressions of love make our nervous system feel safe, valued, and connected. Part 2 will cover receiving gifts, physical touch, and the attachment psychology beneath the five love languages.

July 27th, 2026 - We discuss a troubling report that found that one in five US bishops would ordain men with deep-seated same-sex attraction. Links, Show Notes & More - https://thestationofthecross.com/act Email Us! ACT@TheStationOfTheCross.com

Skip Sams spent years deciding which version of himself was allowed into which room. Corporate leader in one. Recovering addict in another. HIV positive kept quiet in most of them. Then the rollback of DEI protections and rising pressure on gay men to shrink again forced a reckoning: hiding pieces of yourself is not integrity, it is negotiation. Skip breaks down why integrating every part of his identity, instead of editing it room to room, is what actually built his leadership, and why he is gathering twenty men for the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit to practice the same thing. Listeners walk away with a way to stop splitting themselves apart and start deciding who they are, everywhere, all at once. Key Takeaways: Why Skip stopped editing himself room to room and calls that his real definition of leadershipThe actual difference between keeping something private and keeping it secretHow the DEI rollback is pushing gay men back toward old hiding habitsWhat the Gay Men of Integrity Summit is built to address, and who it is forWhy the words you use about yourself matter more than most men realize About Skip Skip Sams is a certified professional coach, speaker, and creator of the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit. He helps gay men close the gap between who they truly are and how they show up in their relationships, careers, and communities—so they can live with greater clarity, confidence, and integrity. For more than a decade, Skip has coached individuals through life's transitions, helping people navigate identity, purpose, relationships, and personal growth. Today, he helps gay men build lives that are true to who they are—not who they think they're supposed to be. He is also the creator of the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit, August 10 - 14, 20206. Connect With Skip Website Sign-up For The Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Feeling bad is not a flaw in the human experience. It's an essential life skill for anyone who wants a life of love, growth, satisfaction, and intimacy— all of it requires the capacity to feel discomfort without running from it. In this episode, Michael and Matt make the case for feeling bad on purpose: when to sit with an emotion, when to change your mindset, and why emotional avoidance often costs us more than the original pain. We get into: Why feeling bad is a skill, not a personal failure The difference between allowing an emotion and reframing your thoughts How men are often taught to avoid, repress, intellectualize, or act out emotions The ways we numb and escape through food, alcohol, sex, porn, productivity, scrolling, and distraction Why building emotional capacity makes you braver, more honest, and more willing to live a bigger life The goal isn't to be happy all the time — it's to become someone who can feel bad without abandoning yourself or shrinking your future. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Why Feeling Bad Is Good For You(00:01:46) - Why Are People So Bad at Feeling Bad?(00:06:06) - How to Win with Emotions(00:08:13) - How to Love Yourself(00:13:16) - How to Get Through Trauma(00:16:52) - What Emotion Is The Hardest To Deal With?(00:20:05) - How To Live A Fully Feeling Life(00:20:54) - How to Deal With Feeling Bad(00:23:48) - The ego takes over the body(00:24:32) - Gay Men's Ways To Cope With Feeling Bad(00:25:45) - How to Stop Feeling Bad(00:29:31) - How to Love Yourself Through Fear(00:30:38) - How to Handle Negative Emotions(00:34:37) - People Cope With Crying(00:35:29) - Gay Men's Brotherhood

• Feeling completely unedited in queer sexual spaces • Whether sex clubs are less judgmental than apps and gay bars • Body confidence, aging and the desire to feel seen • Tenderness and connection during anonymous encounters • The difference between sexual nourishment and emotional escape • Consent, boundaries and creating safer sexual experiences • Why watching, socializing or doing nothing can still be part of the experience • Can a brief sexual encounter be a meaningful form of queer intimacy? Are sex clubs places where gay men lose themselves—or where some gay men finally get to meet themselves? Hot Topic: The gay debate on 'making love' or simply 'f*cking'.... Hot Topic: Gays get called out for wearing stars and stripes on the 4th of July... Hot Topic: Jim Parsons on coming out late...what he felt he was robbed of... Hot Topic: The cruise of hell? More Atlantis drama... Advice: What to do when you run into a nearby Grindr profile that isn't a match... Follow Steve V's new Substack features weekly articles: https://substack.com/@thenakedtruthsteve Follow Stevie on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Jeremy on IG: @jrosslopez Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this Episode, Kelly is joined by writer Gabriel Rotello! He is the author of two books: Sexual Ecology: AIDS and the Destiny of Gay Men and The CBGB Conspiracy. He became the first openly gay op-ed columnist for a major American newspaper and is the founder of Out Week Magazine. He has also written, directed, and produced dozens of TV documentaries for major networks like HBO, Netflix, and the History Channel. Gabriel talks about growing up in Danbury, Connecticut, and traveling into the city with his older brother when he was 13! Even at that age, he knew he wanted to move to New York when he grew up. Kelly asks him what life was like in New York in the 1970s. Gabriel talks about how Manhattan was a playground for young adults in their early 20s. He tells us how cheap his rent was, describes the decay of the Bowery in great detail, and talks about how wonderful it was to play music at CBGB.  Kelly asks Gabriel about CBGB. Gabriel tells us that in the beginning, no one wanted to go there. He describes the "Bowery Bums", the mismanagement of the venue, and its terrible location. He then talks about how it became one of the most famous punk venues in the world.  Gabriel talks a bit about his book: The CBGB Conspiracy. He tells Kelly that he actually did not want to write a book about his time in the 70s at first. With the aids epidemic looming over it, he thought it too depressing. But when inspiration struck, while walking along the street one day, he came up with the idea of creating a murder mystery, with CBGB as the background and weaving in famous people of the era, along with his personal experiences. Kelly asks Gabriel a bit about the process of writing, and Gabriel talks about how he was inspired by a past guest of our show, Jonathan Mahler! He talks about reading Ladies and Gentlemen, The Bronx Is Burning... and being transported back into that time in his life.  Kelly then asks Gabriel what gay life was like back in the day. Gabriel describes the streets of the West Village being filled with shirtless gay men dancing and having the best time on a random Tuesday night. He talks about how there was a feud between the East Village gay community and the West Village gay community. He talks about their differences, what it was like to have one foot in both, and he reflects on how his perception has changed since then.   Gabriel then talks a bit about his partner Hap, who passed during the Aids Epidemic. Gabriel had met Hap when he was studying abroad and just happened to run into each other when he moved to New York. Gabriel talked about how Hap showed him the ropes as a newly out man. He talks about how they dated until Hap's passing. Kelly talks about marching on Washington in support of the movement. Gabriel talks about how it inspired him to start Out Week Magazine, and how he invited outing! But above all else; Gabriel Rotello is a New Yorker! Kelly Kopp's Social Media:@NewYorkCityKopp on all platforms Buy Gabriel's Book! Gabriel's Social Media: @GabeRotello  Jae's Social Media @Studiojae170    Chapters (00:00:00) - New Yorkers: Gabriel Rotello on the Podcast(00:01:57) - Phil Collins on Coming Out in NYC(00:06:02) - Living in the East Village in the 60s(00:09:51) - Punishment for Bowery Bums(00:14:57) - The Talking Heads on Hilly Hill's Death(00:19:50) - Madonna's First Public Gig(00:20:32) - CBGB's Conspiracy is a Novel(00:26:00) - The Making of A Time to Win(00:26:33) - In the Elevator With Steven Spielberg(00:31:42) - Inside The Bowery(00:32:24) - How To Write a Novel(00:33:03) - In the Elevator With Jonathan Harris(00:37:07) - How a dime changed the phone(00:37:24) - Adam Levine on the Gay Scene in New York(00:41:18) - Punk and Disco in the East Village(00:44:13) - In the Elevator With Out Week(00:47:12) - Gabriel on ACT UP and the Gay Community(00:50:54) - What It Means to Be a New Yorker(00:52:47) - How To Find Gabriel Ortello On Social Media

Something goes wrong in bed and gay men immediately blame desire, performance, or themselves. Sex educator and trauma specialist Fran Frye says they're diagnosing the wrong problem. The real issue is the nervous system — and most men have no idea it's running the show. Rick and Fran dig into the five nervous system responses that hijack sexual experiences, why porn is an idea not a manual, and how shame quietly replaces honest communication for gay men over 40. This is not a conversation about dysfunction. It's about finally understanding what your body has been trying to tell you. Key Takeaways: Why "erectile difficulties" are almost always psychological, not physicalHow fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and fuck responses show up during sexThe difference between consent and compliance, and why it mattersWhy gay men struggle more than most with saying noWhat emotional literacy actually looks like in an intimate encounterHow to pause high arousal states before they run the show About Fran Fran Frye works at the intersection of sexuality, trauma, and compassion, with a particular focus on supporting men as they unpack their sexuality within a patriarchal culture that often labels them as dangerous, defective, or emotionally closed off. She helps dismantle these narratives through curiosity, empathy and practical tools that foster healthier relationships with the body, partners and self. A certified Sex Educator, Counselor, and Clinician trained in compulsive sexual behaviors, Fran is also a somatic sex practitioner. Her work spans sexual shame, trauma, grief, relationship rupture and body disconnection, grounded in both professional training and lived experience as a sexual assault survivor, former military spouse, and athlete. Beyond her professional work, Fran is deeply committed to service. Over the years she has volunteered in several areas of crisis and community support, including suicide prevention, rape victim's advocacy, human trafficking prevention, and serving as a rape crisis hotline operator. She has also contributed to efforts addressing food scarcity, sits with hospice patients in their final chapters, and supports Veterans and their families. These experiences have brought her into close contact with trauma, grief, courage, and resilience - insights she carries directly into the compassionate, grounded way she supports others. Connect With Fran Website Instagram YouTube Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Dr. Eddie Capparucci and Tami answer participant questions about sex, love, and addiction. They cover the importance of honoring boundaries, effective check-ins, managing anger, and finding hope when it feels like your addiction has taken over your life.    TAKEAWAYS: [2:40] How do I process multiple inner children in me?  [5:07] Why has the language around betrayal become sanatized?  [11:06] What can I do to finally overcome repeated slips?  [17:08] My partner broke my boundary. Now what?  [22:55] Should I prioritize finding my why or my sobriety work?  [28:09] My spouse refuses to seek help. How can I help?  [31:08] I have too many buckets and I'm constantly disregulated. Help!  [34:25] How can my betraying partner understand the damage of trickled out disclosures?  [38:17] Can check-ins be triggering to the point that they're useful?  [45:10] How can a betraying partner rebuild trust?  [50:18] Why am I afraid of my husband's anger?  [54:46] Is there any hope for an addict like me?    RESOURCES: Seekingintegrity.com Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com Sexandrelationshiphealing.com Intherooms.com Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions.    QUOTES "If your relationships are hurting, why would you want to delay getting the help?"  "Do you understand what drives you toward a slip?"  "The most important thing you can do to rebuild trust is engage with your partner."  "Your behaviors don't define who you are – if you are willing to change them." 

Many successful gay men appear to have everything: thriving careers, financial security, meaningful accomplishments, and lives that others admire. Yet beneath that success, many quietly wonder whether they are truly lovable—or simply valued for what they achieve. In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores why professional success often fails to create emotional security. Drawing on more than 34 years of working with gay men, he explains how childhood experiences of monitoring ourselves, adapting to others' expectations, and earning acceptance can lead to a lifelong belief that love must be continually earned through performance. Topics include: Why success and emotional security are not the same The difference between admiration and genuine intimacy How childhood adaptation becomes adult achievement Why many high-achieving gay men still fear rejection The hidden cost of always appearing strong and capable How emotional visibility creates deeper relationships Why vulnerability—not perfection—is what builds lasting intimacy If you've ever felt admired but not truly known, accomplished but still insecure, or worried that people would lose interest if you stopped performing, this episode offers a compassionate psychological framework for understanding why—and how genuine emotional security can begin to grow.

Rethinking preventionThe funding crisis reshaping global health has hit HIV prevention particularly hard. At the same time, science is handing us some of the most powerful HIV prevention tools we have ever had – long-acting injectables like lenacapavir and cabotegravir, and a monthly oral pill on the horizon. But science alone does not deliver prevention. That takes systems, policy, funding and a trained healthcare workforce. It takes communities leading in planning, implementation and holding the HIV response to account. This episode of HIV unmuted is a curtain raiser for AIDS 2026, the 26th International AIDS Conference, taking place in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, and virtually. The theme of the conference, Rethink. Rebuild. Rise., is also the spirit of this episode. We look at what rethinking prevention means in people's lives, what it will take to rebuild the systems and political will to deliver innovation at scale, and how the global HIV response can rise to this moment. Meet our guests:Axel Bautista, Community Mobilization Coordinator at MPACT Global Action for Gay Men's Health and Rights, shares what rethinking prevention really means on the ground, in communities and in people's lives. Nomathemba Chandiwana, Chief Scientific Officer at the Desmond Tutu Health Foundation in Cape Town and a clinician-scientist at the forefront of HIV prevention, unpacks the systems and science needed to rebuild prevention and make innovation accessible to all. Beatriz Grinsztejn, President of the International AIDS Society and infectious disease physician-researcher at Fiocruz in Rio de Janeiro, asks how the global HIV response can rise at AIDS 2026. Meet our host:Ibanomonde Ngema is a South African HIV advocate for young people living with and affected by HIV. She has spoken at major global platforms, including IAS conferences and the United Nations General Assembly. She serves as South Africa's Her Voice Fund Ambassador and UNFPA's Regional Youth Advocate for East and Southern Africa and has authored a paper in The Lancet. 

A lot of gay men pride themselves on being “nice”— easygoing, agreeable, low-drama. But what if that's exactly why you're not getting what you want? In this episode, we break down the difference between being kind and being “nice,” and how approval-seeking, conflict avoidance, and over-accommodating are quietly killing attraction, respect, and real connection.  We talk about: Why “nice” is often a strategy, not a personality The hidden cost of being liked by everyone How this shows up in dating and relationships The difference between being chosen vs. being liked How to shift from approval-seeking to self-respecting If you've ever felt overlooked, under-appreciated, or stuck in the friend-zone, this one will hit. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deeper: The Nice Guy Trap(00:01:04) - Being Nice(00:03:16) - What Does Being A Nice Guy Actually Mean To You?(00:05:46) - Matt on Being A Nice Guy(00:09:49) - Have You Ever Been The Nice Guy?(00:13:30) - Is Your Friend Think You're A Nice Guy?(00:17:16) - What Is Niceness In Your Relationships?(00:20:09) - Gayman's Brotherhood: Connection Circles(00:20:54) - Why Being a Nice Guy Backfires in Dating(00:23:16) - Matt Says Being Honest In Dating Backfires(00:28:19) - In the Elevator With Michael(00:29:38) - Gay Men on Dating and Relationships(00:30:19) - How to Shift From Being Nice to Being Chosen(00:35:02) - How To Be With Yourself(00:39:06) - Be Candid With Yourself(00:42:15) - Michael Jackson on Not Being Like Everyone(00:45:34) - Matt on Not Being the Nice Guy(00:48:20) - Thank You!

Gay men over 40 know how to find sex. What most of them have never been taught is how to find connection. Court Vox is a certified sex and intimacy coach, founder of The Bodyvox, and one of the sharpest voices working with GBTQ men on what actually gets in the way of real intimacy. He joins Rick to talk about choice fatigue on dating apps, the ruptures that quietly kill relationships before they start, and why so much of what gay men call attraction is really just unexamined shame running the show. This is the conversation about desire that most men are not ready to have. Key Takeaways: How app culture creates choice fatigue that makes genuine connection harderWhy rupture and repair skills are the most underrated tools in any relationshipHow to tell the difference between facts and feelings when conflict hitsThe role homophobia and internalized misogyny play in gay men's attraction patternsWhy resistance to certain desires is almost always repression in disguiseWhat somatic coaching does that talk therapy alone cannot About Court Court Vox is a Certified Sex & Intimacy Coach, based in Los Angeles CA . He is Founder of The Bodyvox. Through his courses, workshops, retreats, and private immersions, clients cultivate toys to unlock limitations and shame, to embrace a deeper sense of intimacy with their whole self. Traditional forms of therapy are done solely through talk, while the work of a somatic coach is to further this form of work via body-based exercises, experiential learning, and touch, in comfortable, judgment-free, and caring environments. Body acceptance, exploration of sensation and desires (and learning how to ask for what you want), boundary-setting and intimacy work are some of the many reasons clients seek this form of learning. Vox is a sex educator experienced working with clients of all sexualities and genders and has been featured in AskMen.com, Cosmopolitan, and Well & Good magazines. He offers workshops and retreats across the globe for GBTQ men, and is also part of an elite team of sex educators that create the celebrated program for women, Back to the Body. His online course and community, Invitations to Intimacy, offers foundations in embodiment suited for the eroticerotic, as well as a community of like-minded individuals to support one another on their journey. Attend Courts Events in 2026 Camp Connect Connect - Joshua Tree Connect With Court Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Have you ever opened Instagram only to discover your friends got together without you? Within seconds, your mind may begin asking painful questions: Did they forget me? Did they not want me there? What's wrong with me? In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores why social exclusion hurts so deeply—and why the real wound often isn't the missed invitation itself, but the meaning we attach to it. Drawing on more than 30 years of experience working with gay men, Ken explains how childhood experiences of feeling different, monitoring ourselves, and searching for acceptance can shape our adult friendships, social lives, and sense of belonging. Topics include: Why being left out feels so painful The difference between facts and assumptions Why social media amplifies feelings of exclusion Why many gay men are waiting to be chosen instead of building connection The difference between friendship and validation How to stop organizing your self-worth around other people's invitations What genuine belonging actually looks like If you've ever wondered why a missed dinner, party, or group trip feels so much bigger than it "should," this episode offers a compassionate psychological framework for understanding what's really happening—and how to build relationships where you no longer have to wonder whether you belong.

In this episode, we're joined by Alan Cox - a CBT practitioner and life coach who specialises in working with gay men.In the conversation, we talked values, honesty, and why he helps gay men work towards monogamous relationships.Host: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Gareth Johnson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.See more Naked Men Talking conversations on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.gtv.blue⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Hookups get a bad rap as shallow, transactional, or disconnected. But what if they could actually become a space for growth, awareness, and real connection? In this episode, we're advocating for shift from default, unconscious hookups  to something more intentional, honest, and grounded. We explore how hookup culture can either reinforce negative patterns or become a powerful mirror for your patterns, desires, boundaries, and capacity for intimacy. We talk about: Why hookups aren't the problem—but how we show up in them can be The difference between unconscious vs. intentional hookups How to bring honesty, communication, and authenticity into casual sex How our own hookups have evolved over time Practical ways to make hookups more enjoyable, respectful, and connected—for everyone involved This isn't about judging hookup culture or pretending it should be something it's not. It's about raising the standard of how you show up—so even casual encounters can feel aligned, present, and real. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - How To Elevate Your Hookup Culture(00:02:22) - The Pros and Cons of Hookup Culture(00:05:50) - What are the cons of hookup culture?(00:07:12) - How Gay Men View Their Hookups(00:11:36) - No More Sex: We Need Love(00:13:34) - What Makes A Hookup Good For You?(00:17:38) - "Honesty Is What Makes A Hookup Good"(00:21:15) - Demisexual Guy On Grindr(00:25:31) - Demisexual People Talk About Their Sexualities(00:26:00) - Michael On His Hookups...(00:29:59) - Elevating Your Hookups(00:31:16) - PODCAST: Please support the community

Can gay men successfully retire early? A lot of gay men tell us the same thing:“I want to retire early.”Or, let's be honest, “I want to retire yesterday.”But then comes the panic: “I don't know if I have enough.” “I don't know how much money I actually need.” “I don't know how to get from here to there.”And this is where most retirement advice makes everything worse. It tells you to chase one giant magic number: $2 million, $3 million, $4 million, or whatever number makes you want to close your laptop, pour a cocktail, and think about it later.But early retirement usually isn't about one giant number. It's about having the right money in the right places at the right time.In this episode of Queer Money, we're talking about how gay men successfully retire early by using five tactics that can speed up your retirement timeline, reduce panic, and help you design a retirement that actually fits your life.Because for gay men, retirement planning is not just about money. It's also about time, health, freedom, safety, location, relationships, and whether you really want to keep working under fluorescent lighting until Medicare shows up.Takeaways from this episode:Why chasing one giant retirement number can sabotage early retirement planningHow to calculate your gap number and your bridge numberWhy early retirement is about income sequencing, not just accumulationHow to build an income bridge before you leave workWhy taxable brokerage accounts, Rule of 55, 72(t), Roth conversions, and cash may all matterHow early retirement can create a powerful tax-planning windowWhy your health should be treated as a financial assetWhy working “just a few more years” is not always freeHow to stress test your retirement plan before you leave workWhy gay men may need to design retirement more intentionally than the traditional advice suggestsThe bigger truth? Early retirement is not always about having more money. Sometimes it's about making better decisions with the money you already have.If you want help understanding your numbers, your timeline, and your next steps, schedule a Queer Money Retirement Readiness Review at the link in the show notes.We'll help you look at where you are, what you have, what you want, and what steps may help you retire early, retire abroad, or simply retire better.Stay fabulous, not fabulously broke.Mentioned in this episode:What if your portfolio came with a visa and passport?That's exactly what the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities Fund can do, bringing together diversification, tax efficiency, and a path to EU residency and a passport. Click the link below to explore your ticket to Europe.Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!Portugal is calling. Will you answer?Don't just dream of moving to Portugal, make it happen with the investments in your IRA. Investing in Portugal gets you residency, the ability to work in Portugal and returns that just may outpace the U.S. like the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities fund did in 2025. Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!

LZ opens his “You Are Beautiful” podcast and interviews Tan France about what makes people feel beautiful, personal style, and self-image. Tan shares his daytime and evening go-to outfits, love of jewelry, and his husband's style influence, then discusses coping with online criticism and the broader culture of cruelty. He reflects on looking in the mirror, gratitude for health after a recent benign scare, appreciation for his Pakistani skin after years of hating it due to racism, and his birth name pronunciation. Tan recounts learning to sew as a child to make clothes for his mother and sister, navigating being queer and not fully out to family, and the nuance of being a visibly gay Muslim on Western TV. They discuss Queer Eye's impact, production time with participants, meaningful and difficult “heroes,” Tan's struggle with aging, marriage priorities, and advice for finding style by borrowing inspiration and building your own.Menu: 00:00 Welcome You Are Beautiful00:53 Meet Tan France01:50 Signature Style Staples06:09 Handling Online Hate12:23 Mirror Check Self Image15:45 Learning To Love Skin17:11 Real Name Roots18:41 Fashion Spark Sewing21:50 Queer Eye Coming Out25:08 Representation And Stakes27:27 Rock Bottom Realization27:37 Early Attraction Awakening28:00 Dad's Store Lessons29:14 Watching Queer Eye Hurt30:31 Why Style Matters31:08 Makeover Intimacy Method32:02 Queer Eye Time Limits34:07 Choosing Stores and Stylists36:31 Hero Who Changed Him37:58 When Heroes Resist38:38 A Racist Hero Incident40:53 Favorite Feel Good Episodes42:01 When Self Care Slips44:13 Struggling With Aging46:33 Gay Men and Beauty Pressure48:48 Off Camera Fab Five51:15 Marriage Secret Sauce52:12 Dating and LA Insecurity53:39 Finding Signature Style54:58 Beautiful Because Authentic

The Des Moines Gay Men's Chorus sings music with a message. On this episode of Talk of Iowa, we hear from two members as the chorus turns 25 years old. Then, we hear from the founder of 'The Healing Obituary.' She teaches how to write obituaries and makes the case for why they should be done by humans.

"Come forth, wake up gay, feel gay, go to sleep gay."America turns 250 years old this year, and Pride is 56 years young. In this special episode featuring the Gay Men's Chorus of Los Angeles, Sapphire's Earplay celebrates Pride, resilience, and the songs that shaped LGBTQIA+ history.GMCLA is taking over the Saban Theatre in Los Angeles on June 27 & 28 with Declarations of Independence — a powerful celebration of music that has defined and inspired the LGBTQIA+ community for generations.Grab your tickets at gmcla.org/declarations and use code WEHOPRIDE26 for a special discount at checkout.Stay Connected: https://linktr.ee/msradiosapphire

Many gay men believe their struggles stem from anxiety, loneliness, dating frustrations, low self-esteem, or difficult relationships. But underneath many of these challenges lies a quieter and often overlooked pattern: self-abandonment. In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores how gay men learn to disconnect from their feelings, needs, boundaries, anger, instincts, and even their dignity in order to preserve connection, approval, desirability, or emotional safety. Drawing from more than 30 years of clinical work, Ken explains how childhood experiences of conditional acceptance, invisibility, bullying, and self-monitoring can evolve into adult patterns of self-suppression that quietly erode self-respect and intimacy. Topics include: What self-abandonment actually is Why many gay men learn to prioritize acceptance over authenticity How self-abandonment masquerades as maturity, patience, and understanding The hidden resentment created by chronic self-suppression Nine common forms of self-abandonment in everyday life How to set boundaries without guilt The difference between healthy compromise and self-betrayal Why authentic relationships require self-respect If you've ever found yourself laughing off hurt feelings, staying too long in one-sided relationships, over-explaining your boundaries, suppressing your anger, or making yourself smaller to keep the peace, this episode offers a framework for understanding what's happening—and how to begin reconnecting with yourself.

Most gay men were never shown what lasting love actually looks like. Steven C. Law lived it for 45 years and then wrote a book to make sure nobody forgets what it cost to love freely before the world made room for it. "The Story of Bob" traces the life of gay rights activist Reverend Bob Wood, a man who spent decades hiding his relationship out of fear, denying himself the simplest moments of connection. Steven and Rick get honest about what it means to be celebrated rather than tolerated, why gay men over 40 carry grief they have never named, and what a 45-year relationship teaches you about love that has nothing left to prove. Key Takeaways: Why being tolerated is not enough and what being truly celebrated actually feels likeWhat Bob Wood's hidden love story reveals about the price gay men paid to surviveHow long-term gay relationships evolve into something most people never get to experienceWhy gay men over 40 carry unprocessed grief from an era nobody wants to revisitWhat 45 years with the same man teaches you about intimacy, silence, and presence About Steven Steven C. Law is a writer whose work bridges faith and cultural engagement. His commitment to compassionate storytelling enriches The Story of Bob with insight and empathy. Steven Law holds degrees from Campbell University and Colgate Rochester Crozer Divinity School, where his focus was Christian ethics and social policy. As an ordained pastor, he served rural and urban churches, before studying creative writing with C. Michael Curtis. Chief among his accomplishments are 45 bliss-filled years with Dr. William "Donald” Stroud, with whom he created Découvert Fine Art, an art gallery specializing in European Master drawings. He is the founder and president of the Law Stroud Foundation - www.lawstroudfoundation.org. He lives in Rockport, MA. Connect With Steven Website Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Let's have an uncomfortable conversation.Why are so many gay men obsessed with straight men?Seriously.From childhood crushes to gym bros, coworkers, and social media creators who make a living selling the fantasy, the straight man allure has become a huge part of gay culture. But where does it come from? Why do so many people find themselves chasing men who were never available in the first place?In this episode, I'm talking about attraction, masculinity, validation, fantasy, and why I absolutely cannot stand the straight man content business model that's all over social media right now.Some of y'all might agree with me.Some of y'all definitely won't.Either way, let's banter.

Gay men know what it cost to come out. Bisexual people paid that same price and then got rejected by the community that was supposed to finally understand. Katherine Wela Bogen is a doctoral candidate in clinical psychology, scholar-activist with 600K followers, and author of the debut novel Queering Him. She and Rick get into the real conversation gay and bisexual men keep not having: where the experiences genuinely overlap, where they do not, and why assuming you already understand bisexuality because you know gay identity causes real damage. This one asks gay men over 40 to look at a blind spot most of them did not know they had. Key Takeaways: Where gay and bisexual experience genuinely meet and where they part waysWhy bisexual people have worse health outcomes than gay or lesbian individualsHow double discrimination operates differently than what gay men experienceWhat it actually costs to get rejected by the community that should get it mostWhat Queering Him is and why Katie wrote it About Katherine In her own words, Katherine Wela Bogen is “first, a storyteller; second, a scholar-activist; and third, a joyful little freak.” Bisexual and Jewish, she grew up in rural New England. A doctoral candidate in clinical psychology, studying the intersections of bisexual identity, sexual trauma, sexual functioning, and kink, she has published more than forty peer-reviewed papers and is the host of the political podcast SuperHumanizer. Bogen's 600k+ social media followers will recognize her as @k.w.bogen from her public-facing scholar activism. Queering Him, the first in the Avra and Kieran trilogy, is Bogen's debut novel. Connect With Katherine Website Instagram Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

For many gay men, our relationship with our dad is one of the most defining- and least talked about. In this episode, we explore the nuances of our relationships with our fathers through three core questions: How did your dad react when you came out? How do you express your gayness around him today? Does being gay impact the level of intimacy you have with your dad? From there, we go deeper into family dynamics, cultural expectations, and the different expressions of love and acceptance between fathers and their gay sons. We get into physical affection between fathers and sons, how much access we give them into our lives, and the boundaries we set as adults. We also explore how these early relationships can shape the kinds of men we're attracted to… and the patterns we carry into dating and relationships. This is a grounded, honest conversation about the often complex and layered relationship between fathers and sons.  Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Going Deeper: The Daddy Issue(00:01:47) - Did Gay Men Need Daddies?(00:03:20) - How Did My Dad React To My Coming Out?(00:07:49) - How Did My Dad React To My Coming Out?(00:10:18) - Reno On Not Bringing Up Gay Issues With His Father(00:14:24) - When My Gay Friend Comes Out(00:14:43) - How Did My Dad React To Coming Out?(00:18:53) - Coming Out To My Dad(00:20:52) - How Do You Describe Your Gayness To Your Dad?(00:27:38) - How Do I Feel Representing My Gayness To My Dad?(00:31:14) - How My Parents Accept My Gay Love Life(00:33:37) - Do You Hold Back Your Gayness When You're Around Your Dad(00:37:56) - Adam Levine on Father-Son Conferences(00:42:40) - Does Being Gay Impact How You Experience Intimate Touch With Your Dad(00:45:32) - Does Being Gay Impact How I Experience Intimate With My Dad?(00:47:52) - Michael Jackson on His Dad's Love(00:51:09) - We Love You, Dads

In 1998, eight months into Tony Blair's government, seven gay and bisexual working-class men from Bolton were convicted at Crown Court of buggery and gross indecency for having consensual sex together in a private home. No victim. No complaint. Some went to prison. All were placed on the sex offenders register. The laws used against them dated back to 1895, and in one case to 1533. Greater Manchester Police, the same force that prosecuted Alan Turing, pursued this case with a fervour no other police force in the country was matching at the time. Almost nobody knows this happened. Hugh Sheehan is the writer and audio producer behind Criminally Queer: The Bolton 7, the five-part BBC Sounds documentary series that spent years in the making and is referenced in Russell T Davies' Channel 4 drama Tip Toe, starring Alan Cumming as a gay bar owner in Manchester's Gay Village. Davies made Tip Toe because, in his words, the fight is back on. He's right. And the Bolton Seven are a significant part of why. In this episode of Outcast World, Graeme and Hugh cover the full story: the centuries-old laws that remained quietly on the books after partial decriminalisation in 1967, the two-man rule that made consensual group sex a criminal act regardless of what straight people were doing, the class dimension that meant working-class men from Bolton had no legal defences that a wealthier man in a privately owned home might have had, and the Chief Constable whose fundamentalist homophobia had shaped Greater Manchester Police for over a decade before the Bolton Seven were ever arrested. Criminally Queer: The Bolton 7 is available on BBC Sounds, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts.

Why Have So Many Gay Men Struggled to Save for Retirement?We hear this from gay men all the time, usually those in their 50s or pushing their 60s:“I want to retire now, but I have absolutely nothing saved.”And when we ask what happened, the answer usually isn't laziness. It isn't that they didn't care. It often comes down to three quiet beliefs many gay men inherited from culture, trauma, fantasy, and avoidance.In this episode of Queer Money, we're talking about the three retirement plans that sabotage gay men and keep too many of us from saving, investing, and building the future we actually want.These are some of the biggest gay retirement mistakes we see:“I'll die young and beautiful.”“I'll marry a sugar daddy.”“I'll figure it out later.”For many gay men, especially those who came of age during the HIV/AIDS crisis, the idea of growing old, happy, healthy, loved, financially stable, and free wasn't something we were encouraged to imagine. Some of us didn't believe we'd live long enough. Some of us hoped someone else would save us. And some of us assumed we'd eventually get serious about money later.But later showed up, and now she wants receipts.This episode is not about shame. Shame is not a retirement plan either. This is about naming the myths that may have helped us survive emotionally, but are now sabotaging our older gay selves financially.Takeaways from this episode:Why many gay men struggle to picture themselves as older, secure, and financially freeHow the “I'll die young” myth became one of the most damaging gay retirement mistakesWhy waiting for a partner, husband, or sugar daddy to fund your retirement is not a planHow “I'll figure it out later” quietly sabotages retirement savings and investingWhy time in the market matters more than waiting until you “have more money”How old survival beliefs can turn into financial avoidanceWhy gay retirement planning is really about creating options, dignity, freedom, and joyHow asset acquisition and cash-flow building can help gay men retire betterIf this hits a little close to home and you're ready to finally have the retirement conversation, schedule a Retirement Readiness Review with us at the link in the show notes.We'll help you look at where you are, where you want to go, and what steps you can take to retire early, retire abroad, or simply retire better.Chapters:00:00 - Intro01:41 - Starting convo02:42 - Myth 105:52 - Myth 207:56 - Myth 311:41 - Self Reflection13:04 - Reframing 15:37 - The Fix16:33 - OutroMentioned in this episode:Portugal is calling. Will you answer?Don't just dream of moving to Portugal, make it happen with the investments in your IRA. Investing in Portugal gets you residency, the ability to work in Portugal and returns that just may outpace the U.S. like the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities fund did in 2025. Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!What if your portfolio came with a visa and passport?That's exactly what the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities Fund can do, bringing together diversification, tax efficiency, and a path to EU residency and a passport. Click the link below to explore your ticket to Europe.Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!

Listen to Gabe Salazar, the Artistic Director of the Gay Men's Chorus of South Florida, as he sharesthe inspiration for the latest concert which honors the families and community impacted by the Pulse shooting.

Jake and Kendrick came on Dance Dad to talk about Heated Rivalry. They ended up talking about something much harder: what gay men are taught to hide from themselves and each other.   John Corella, host of Dance Dad and co-creator of Dance Moms, sits down with Jake and Kendrick of The JK But Gay Show for a Pride Month conversation about body image, masculinity, friendship, intimacy, and the stories gay men carry into adulthood. The episode starts with a debate about Heated Rivalry, but it quickly becomes more personal than anyone expected.   John came in skeptical of the show. Jake and Kendrick came in as fans. What they work out together touches on gay body image issues, whether therapy changes the way you consume media, and whether a show can be pure entertainment and still carry a real responsibility to the people watching it. Nobody wraps it up neatly, and that is what makes it worth listening to.   The conversation gets personal fast. Jake talks about growing up where crying was not acceptable and what that cost him. Kendrick shares a coming out story that started during confession at the Vatican. John reflects honestly on why he kept falling for emotionally unavailable men. LGBTQ masculinity is not treated as a talking point here. It comes up the way it actually lives, inside specific memories and patterns that took years to name.   Underneath all of it is the thing Jake and Kendrick built together. Real gay male friendship is rarer than it should be, and they started their show because they knew that. Gay men and emotional maturity, platonic loyalty, and what it looks like to grow alongside another person are not side topics here. They are the whole foundation.   This is one of those episodes that stays with you.   Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Welcome to Dance Dad with John Corella 02:10 Meet Jake and Kendrick of the JK But Gay Show 08:31 Does Heated Rivalry Give Gay Men Body Image Issues 15:55 Hiding Your Identity in Sports and the Closet 41:17 Does Heated Rivalry Reinforce or Challenge Masculinity 48:12 Why Gay Men Are Drawn to Emotionally Unavailable Partners 52:51 The Difference Between Sex and Intimacy for Gay Men 59:46 A Gay Therapist Explains Why Heated Rivalry Feels So Good 1:17:06 Kendrick's Coming Out Story at the Vatican 1:21:04 Favorite Selena Quintanilla Songs 1:24:10 The Boldest Thing Each of Them Has Ever Done   Connect with Jake and Kendrick: Follow Jake and Kendrick on Instagram    Connect with John Corella: Follow Dance Dad with John Corella on Instagram Follow John on Instagram Join Dance Dad with John Corella on Patreon Visit John Corella's website Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Connect with Chris Tompkins:  ARoadTripToLove.com  Instagram  @ARoadTripToLove Find Travis: travisstock.com Instagram: @travers03 Support the show at patreon.com/thenewmasculine.

You lived through it. You lost people. And somewhere along the way you decided HIV was somebody else's problem now. It is not. Andrew Spieldenner and Alex Garner from MPact Global Action join Rick for a conversation that does not let the queer community off the hook. MPact works across 60 countries supporting LGBTQ-led organizations fighting HIV stigma, funding cuts, and the political forces making all of it worse. This episode covers where the stigma still lives, why gay men over 50 are among the fastest growing groups of new diagnoses, and why staying sexual, visible, and engaged is still an act of resistance. Key Takeaways: Why HIV stigma has not gone away, it has just gotten quieter and more insidiousHow structural racism and poverty drive HIV transmission more than individual behaviorWhy gay men over 50 are seeing rising new diagnosis rates and what that meansThe dangerous gap between available prevention tools and who actually gets access to them About Andrew Andrew R. Spieldenner, Ph.D. is Executive Director of MPact Global Action, an international gay rights organization in the HIV response, and Professor in the Department of Communication at California State University-San Marcos. Openly living with HIV, Dr. Spieldenner's writing is at the intersection of health and culture, particularly looking at HIV and the LGBTQ community. Dr. Spieldenner's edited books include Intercultural Health Communication, Post-AIDS Discourse in Health Communication, and the award-winning A Pill for Promiscuity. About Alex Alex Garner is a writer, artist, and community advocate dedicated to advancing queer visibility and health equity. He currently serves as Senior Director of Strategic Initiatives & Communications at MPact Global Action and previously led sexual health innovation and global campaigns as Senior Health Innovation Strategist at Hornet. With over 25 years in community organizing and two decades as a writer, Alex uses storytelling, art, and advocacy to humanize queer experiences and destigmatize conversations around sex, HIV, and identity. Born and raised in Southern California, Alex is a proud Chicano, gay/queer, and male-presenting person who embraces fluidity and authenticity. Living openly with HIV for 30 years, he shares his personal journey including his time as a sex worker and performer to challenge stigma and inspire others. Connect With Andrew and Alex Website Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Michael Pezzullo, LMFT, is a licensed marriage and family therapist, gay men's therapist, relationship coach, speaker, and creator of Therapy for Gay Men. His work focuses on helping gay men understand the deeper emotional and relational patterns shaping their dating lives, sexuality, attraction, confidence, self-worth, trauma, addiction, intimacy, and relationships.In this conversation, Michael Pezzullo and Dr. Joe Kort explore why gay men often repeat the same dating and relationship patterns, why emotionally unavailable men can feel so compelling, and how early experiences, insecurity, shame, and the desire to belong can influence who men pursue and what they tolerate in relationships. Michael discusses how many gay men may feel stuck not because they lack insight, but because deeper emotional patterns continue to shape their choices beneath the surface.They also discuss gay identity, labels, and the difference between calling oneself gay, queer, or something else entirely. Michael and Dr. Kort talk about why language can feel empowering for some people and painful for others, especially when certain words were once used as slurs. They also explore generational differences, individual identity, and why it is important to let people define themselves in the language that feels most accurate to them.The conversation also looks at gay dating, body image, self-worth, and the pressure some men feel to fit into certain gay spaces or beauty standards. Michael shares his perspective on dating in places like West Hollywood, the myth that more options always make dating easier, and how comparison, insecurity, and the search for belonging can shape gay men's experiences in community, sex, and relationships.Michael and Dr. Kort also discuss open relationships, monogamy, porn, sexual confidence, erectile dysfunction medication, gay shame, and the importance of honest communication between partners. They explore why open relationships are not automatically better or worse than monogamy, why both require negotiation and emotional honesty, and why gay men need more space to talk openly about what works, what does not, and what actually feels safe and meaningful.Listen to this Smart Sex, Smart Love episode as Dr. Joe Kort talks with Michael Pezzullo about gay dating patterns, emotionally unavailable men, gay shame, open relationships, self-worth, sexuality, labels, body image, and what it takes for gay men to build stronger intimacy, confidence, and emotional safety.Support the show

A lot of gay men take pride in being independent, self-sufficient and in control. But is there a shadow side? When the time comes to let someone in, ask for support, or even rely on others—it feels uncomfortable, exposing, even threatening. In this episode, we explore the spectrum between dependence, co-dependence, independence, hyper-independence, and interdependence—and why so many gay men get stuck at the far end of doing life alone. We talk about:  What hyper-independence actually is (and why it's so common) The fear of losing yourself, your freedom, or your identity Why intimacy feels harder than being alone How this shows up in dating, relationships, and asking for support What it looks like to move toward interdependence (secure attachment)  This isn't about becoming dependent. It's about learning how to find a happy middle ground where you can let someone in without losing yourself or pulling further away.  Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deeper: How to Let People In(00:01:14) - What is Dependency and Independence?(00:03:34) - Guys Who Are Hyper Independent or Codependent(00:04:54) - Cocodependent and Secure Attachment: How Do You Know(00:08:04) - How to Grow Up With Someone (Gay Men)(00:10:49) - Insecure Attachment and The Fear That(00:13:38) - What Are Some Boundaries That You Have For Yourself?(00:15:23) - What's the Hardest Part of Learning To Trust Again?(00:17:06) - How Anxious Attachers Get Out Of Conflict(00:18:45) - How To Start Moving Toward Interdependence(00:20:21) - Can An Avoidant Attachment Style Overcorrect Into Becoming Cod(00:24:59) - How to Cope With Anxious Partner(00:27:54) - The Importance of Living With Your Partner(00:30:44) - How To Overcome The Fear Of Disappointment During Relationships(00:34:35) - Gay Men Talk About Being Independent

Dr. Rob and Tami answer participant questions about boundaries, chronic betrayal, and recovery timelines. They address the pregnant partner, the betrayed spouse with an STD, and the mother of teens who wants to keep her children from following down the path of addiction and betrayal.    TAKEAWAYS: [1:30] Can ketamine EMDR help my betrayed wife?  [7:10] I'm pregnant. Should I stop checking in on his recovery?  [14:35] Boundaries are set to keep you safe.  [16:58] Why should he stop acting out when it has increased the intensity of our sex life?  [24:09] Can an addict like me actually come out of this on the other side?  [34:10] Am I really the victim?  [36:52] How can I build trust after chronic betrayal?  [40:26] He acted out in my one deal-breaker way. Now what?  [47:30] How do couples recovery from sexual betrayal and compromised health?  [50:48] How can I talk to my boys so they don't go down the same path as their father?    RESOURCES: Seekingintegrity.com Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com Sexandrelationshiphealing.com Intherooms.com Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions.    QUOTES "He should be showing you with his actions when his recovery is solid."  "He's going to do what he's going to do whether you ask or you don't."  "You have to do what you need to do to take care of you regardless of what he does."  "Addicts are always either moving forward in recovery or sliding back."   

There's something unique about friendships between gay and straight men. They often feel easy, natural, and unexpectedly intimate. In this episode, we explore the unique reasons why gay and straight men are drawn towards each other. From male bonding and emotional intimacy to validation, and the freedom to drop the “rules” of being a man, these friendships often offer something both sides aren't getting elsewhere. We unpack: Why gay men are drawn to straight men… and what they represent Why straight men feel safe, open, and even curious around gay men How masculinity is shifting in 2026… and where these friendships fit What each side gives the other and how we balance each other out  This isn't about hookups or labels. It's about what men are craving, and what that reveals about modern masculinity. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gaming Going Deeper(00:00:59) - Gay Men On Straight Men's Friendship(00:04:43) - Why Do Gay Men Are Attracted To Straight Men?(00:06:55) - Gay Hockey Players Play With Straight Guys(00:08:41) - Why Are You Attracted To Straight Male Friends?(00:13:32) - Straight Men On The Gay Men's Brotherhood(00:17:46) - Gay Men's Brotherhood Connection Circles(00:18:28) - Why Are Straight Men Drawn To Gay Men?(00:22:43) - Damon on Why Gay Men Are Drawn to Him(00:23:50) - Straight Men Are Desperate For Sex(00:26:45) - Broke Male Podcast: Permission To Be You(00:31:41) - "It's Okay to Hug Your Gay Father"(00:33:11) - Gay Men Going Deep(00:33:48) - Gay Men Want More Sexual Closeness(00:39:15) - Straight Men Talk About Gay Bars(00:41:46) - Set Free Your Gay Men!(00:43:12) - Going Deep: Gay Men's Brotherhood

In Part 1 of this series, we explored why insight alone isn't enough to create real change in gay men's lives — even for those who are highly self-aware, emotionally intelligent, and deeply reflective. So what actually does work? In Part 2, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, moves beyond theory and into real-world application. This episode focuses on the practical side of personal growth: how to translate insight into concrete, repeatable behaviors that lead to meaningful change. Instead of trying to "fix everything," Ken introduces a more realistic and effective approach — replacing old patterns with small, intentional actions that build over time. This episode explores: Why change requires replacement, not just awareness How to interrupt emotional and behavioral loops in real time The role of structure, delay, and intentional choice in breaking compulsive patterns Why "partial wins" matter more than perfection How to reduce isolation through small, manageable social actions The difference between motivation and movement How self-respect is built through behavior, not just mindset Ken also walks through specific, real-life examples of how to replace common patterns, including: compulsive app use → meaningful connection urgency and impulsivity → structure and delay emotional numbing → purposeful action self-criticism → self-respect through follow-through isolation → low-pressure social engagement If you've ever felt like you know what's going on in your life — but still struggle to change it — this episode offers a clear and grounded path forward. Because at a certain point, growth isn't about understanding more. It's about living differently.

Many gay men already understand themselves surprisingly well. They've read the books, listened to the podcasts, explored their childhood patterns, and can explain their shame, anxiety, trauma, or relationship struggles in detail. So why do so many still feel stuck? In Part 1 of this two-part series, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores one of the biggest limitations of insight-based personal growth: understanding yourself does not automatically change your life. Drawing from more than 34 years of work with gay men, Ken explains why insight alone often turns into rumination instead of transformation — and why lasting change requires behavioral shifts, emotional regulation, structure, repetition, and real-world action. This episode explores: Why books like The Velvet Rage and The Body Keeps the Score are helpful — but incomplete on their own The repeating emotional-behavioral loops many gay men experience Why shame and trauma frameworks can unintentionally keep people stuck The difference between awareness and behavioral change How gay men can begin replacing compulsive or self-defeating patterns with healthier alternatives Why "partial wins" matter more than perfection How therapy and coaching can help translate insight into real-life change Ken also offers practical examples of replacement behaviors for: compulsive app use emotional numbing self-criticism isolation urgency and impulsivity all-or-nothing thinking If you've ever thought: "I understand why I do this… but I still keep doing it," this episode is for you. Part 2 will continue the conversation by exploring additional behavioral replacements and strategies for handling the everyday stressors many gay men face.

Dr. Marc Brackett, PhD, is founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University. We discuss the science of emotion regulation and practical tools to increase your emotional intelligence. Dr. Brackett clarifies exactly how to do that both in the context of relationships, but also things that you can do on your own to become more emotionally intelligent to later serve you in the context of relationships, work, school, etc. We also discuss how your childhood experiences influence your relationship with emotions, with particular emphasis on how boys and men are socialized around emotional processing and expression. Read the show notes at hubermanlab.com. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman Joovv: https://joovv.com/huberman Lingo: https://hellolingo.com/huberman LMNT: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman Rorra: https://rorra.com/huberman Timestamps (00:00:00) Marc Brackett (00:02:55) Emotion Regulation (00:05:53) Emotion Mindset, Anxiety; Good or Bad Emotions? (00:11:25) Sponsors: Joovv & Lingo (00:13:54) Permission for Happiness; Gender, Emotion Suppression (00:22:13) Young Men, Vulnerability, Incapable; Gay Men (00:31:00) Boys & Men, Crying; Emotion Socialization (00:37:34) Sponsor: AG1 (00:38:58) Physical Interaction; Rough/Tumble Play, Teaching Emotion Regulation (00:46:47) Emotion Calibration, Tools: Leaders & Being a Role Model; Meta-Moment (00:56:15) Meditation & Stress Tolerance, Tool: Label Emotions; Childhood (01:03:12) Sponsor: LMNT (01:04:32) Understand Your Assumptions, Tool: Intentional Co-Regulation (01:12:09) Vocabulary & Rethinking Emotion, Tool: Reframing (01:15:49) Emotional Intelligence Training, Self-Evaluation (01:22:15) Living with Discomfort & Emotional Intelligence (01:27:01) Marc's Work & Criticism; Emotion "Leakage" & Switching Mindset (01:34:19) Sponsor: Rorra (01:35:32) Excitement, Positive Emotion; Modern Concerns, AI & Disconnection (01:45:11) Major Societal Challenges & Everyday Progress (01:54:38) Physical/Emotional Identity & Envision Best Self, Tool: Meta-Moment (02:05:33) Emotional Intelligence (02:12:46) Curiosity & Compassion; Reflection, Identity (02:19:32) Point of Connection Game (02:25:02) Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Sponsors, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Marc Breedlove, PhD, is a professor of neuroscience at Michigan State University and an expert on how hormones shape brain development and sexual orientation. We discuss how prenatal testosterone impacts whether someone is romantically attracted to men or women later in life, and what correlates of sexual orientation — such as finger-length ratios — tell us about the role of hormones in brain and psychological development. We also discuss why the number of older brothers a male has biases sexual orientation. Throughout, we explain how nature and nurture interact to shape male-female differences, behavior, and romantic partner choice. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman David: https://davidprotein.com/huberman Rorra: https://rorra.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman Timestamps (00:00:00) Marc Breedlove (00:03:24) Hormones & Sexual Orientation (00:07:37) Prenatal Testosterone, Finger Ratio, Men & Women Differences (00:14:08) Sponsors: David & Rorra (00:16:46) Finger Ratios, Prenatal Testosterone, Gay & Straight Men/Women (00:23:57) Mice & Sex Differences, Androgens (00:26:54) Brain Differences & Sexual Orientation (00:33:52) Group vs Individual Differences, Height Analogy; Bisexuality (00:36:57) Brain Development, Hormones & Behavior; Brain Plasticity (00:42:52) Sponsor: AG1 (00:44:16) Sexual Behavior, Libido (00:51:37) Gay Rams, Brain Differences (00:58:00) Aversion Pathway, Men vs Women, Same-Sex Partner (01:06:58) Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia (CAH), Intersex Phenotypes (01:13:55) Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (AIS) (01:18:14) Sponsor: Function (01:19:25) Gay Men & Older Brothers, Maternal Immunization Hypothesis (01:32:55) CAH Carriers, Advantage, Stress Tolerance (01:35:41) Birds & Sexual Differentiation, Gynandromorphs (01:41:32) Anabolic Steroids, Hypersexuality; Adult Brain Plasticity (01:45:31) Age & Testosterone Decline; Sexual Orientation & Activities (01:53:14) Marc's Academic Journey, Ozarks, Luck (02:02:35) Exploration; Kids & Sex Differences (02:08:47) Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Sponsors, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shia LaBeouf talks about the gay men incident that led to his arrest