I Do, We Do

We love assessments over here. On past episodes we have discussed the DISC, Enneagram, Love Languages and Myers Briggs. In this episode, we dig into the Energy Leadership Index which enables leaders to hold up mirrors to their perceptions, attitudes, behaviors, and overall leadership capabilities. We hand the show over to special guest, Claire Becker who walks us through our results just as she does her coaching clients.  Be sure to connect with Claire via here website: https://www.clairebeckercoaching.com. Connect with her on Instagram: @ClaireBeckerCoaching About Claire: Claire doesn’t accept the world as it is. As a leadership coach, she works with change agents who are ready to grow themselves and their impact on the community around them so that each day we get closer to a world that truly serves all of us. Claire was trained by the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), accredited by the International Coaching Federation. Before launching her coaching practice, she spent a decade working in education and professional development, serving learners and developing leaders of all ages. Her past experiences include leading as a bilingual middle school educator, as an adjunct faculty for multiple graduate-level courses, and as a coach for teachers, professionals and leaders. At the local level, Claire is a partner in facilitating on topics such as White Identity Formation and Development, Unconscious Bias, Anti-Racism, and Microaggressions as well as general team development and best practices for adult learning and facilitation.Claire graduated from University of Wisconsin-Madison with a Bachelor of Arts in Sociology & Spanish. She then attended Cardinal Stritch University and received a Master of Urban Education and completed a thesis on Metacognitive Learning in 2012.  

We recently moved into an RV full-time, as we continue to embrace a more minimalist lifestyle. In this episode, we share what minimalism is to us and how we are working be more minimal. We discuss how we have prioritized experiences in our lives. We are hoping to experience a lot of new adventures while living and traveling in our RV.

It has been a year since our little guy, Lincoln was born. In this episode, we reflect back on the episode we recorded in the delivery room as we waited to welcome Lincoln to the world. We shared our hopes and dreams for our son a year ago and now we share updates on how things have gone. We also break some BIG NEWS! Happy Birthday, Lincoln! We love you, even though we didn't plan for you!

Josh & Elisha are truly a couple who does it all. They run multiple side-hustles in addition to working full-time and parenting. There’s nothing this couple can’t do! Listen in as we chat with them about how they support one another in their businesses, the process they use for setting and adjusting goals, and their debt-free journey.

The pandemic has caused some unusual things. Social distancing? Conspiracy theorists? The uptick in “uncoupling”? We’ve found ourselves on different pages in two major parts of our lives. With the extra time, we each invested it in different ways. For Billy, it has been his career. For Ashley, it has been parenthood. Investing time in these areas has also left the other behind - hence, we are on different pages. Listen in as we replay the first conversation we had about this and how we are already working through this. What we talked about in this episode: What the extra time during the pandemic has looked like for us How Ashley brought up this conversation This method is NOT recommended! The areas of our life we are on the same page Why being on different pages doesn’t have to be an area of conflict How we plan to work through this and tips for you in your relationship

We have a bone to pick with the Golden Rule - treat others the way you want to be treated. It is a rule that is engraved in our brains from a young age, but we think it’s wrong. ESPECIALLY in relationships. Listen to this episode as we upgrade to the Platinum Rule - treat others the way they want to be treated.  What we talked about in this episode: Why the Golden Rule is wrong Upgrading to the Platinum Rule Examples of how we treat each other the way they want to be treated

You may not know this about us, but we are COMPLETE OPPOSITES. Oh wait, we only constantly talk about that on this podcast. Nearly every assessment we've ever taken points out how different we are. Our Myers Briggs results point this out too. In this episode, we zero in on that first letter of the MBTI results - introvert vs extrovert. We share our favorite… and least favorite things about being married to the opposite! What we talked about in this episode: Our Myers Briggs (or MBTI) results Billy is an INTJ Ashley is and ENFP The difference between introverts and extroverts Our favorite things about each other for being the opposite Our least favorite things about each other for being the opposite  The value in being an introvert/extrovert couple

It has been a tough couple of weeks as we all learned about the deaths of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and George Floyd. We need to have some tough conversations about race. But that requires vulnerability. We have to shed those layers and embrace imperfection. In this episode, we share a few recent moments of vulnerability in our relationship, how its brought us together and where we still need work. We believe vulnerability is key to having difficult conversations and can improve race relations in our world. Being vulnerable with your partner can take your relationship to the next level.

We are often asked how we spend SO much time together without driving each other crazy. Right now, a lot of couples are spending more time together than usual, which is leading to conflict. In this episode, we chat about how we thrive together through communication, vulnerability based trust and goal setting. The key to our partnership is that we focus on thriving rather than just surviving. This is how we grow together rather than apart.

It is a scary time for our world as we grapple with the reality that is COVID-19 and the impact is is having on our way of life. We are sheltering in place here in Austin, Texas and in this episode we share what are new normal looks like. We share what work is like for us now, what we are doing to pass the time and how we are using this pandemic as an opportunity to come even closer together. Spoiler alert - one of us randomly bought a PS4... Guess who?!

It has been a hot minute since we last released an episode, so allow us to reintroduce ourselves! In this episode, we go back to the beginning. Who were are individually, who we are together. We chat about why we started this podcast and what it has become. If you're a new listener, hopefully this keeps you coming back. For our loyal listeners, we hope this will remind you where we started. A lot has changed. One thing continues to stay the same. We are better together.

Setting goals together did not always come easy for us. Billy had two decades of experience before meeting Ashley. Ashley had no experience. Billy remained persistent, but was patient as Ashley explored goal setting. And now it’s become a way we bond and allow us to grow together. Listen in as we provide examples to encourage your partner when they are not on board. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our experience setting goals prior to our relationship Billy began setting goals at the age of four. By the time we met, he had years of knowledge on the value of goal-setting. Ashley had never set goals and not even a new year’s resolution. The closest she ever came to setting a goal was giving something up for Lent. Billy’s passion for goal-setting was tough for Ashley to match at first Ashley was apprehensive towards goal-setting Billy continued mentioning resources for Ashley to start the process but nothing stuck. It wasn’t until Billy guided Ashley into a program that gave her the space to find her own footing. Goal setting brought us together Billy was patient but persistent in getting Ashley to embrace goal-setting Billy adapted his style to a style that work for us together Ready to start setting goals as a couple? Check out of free Goal Setting for Partners guide at bashleymoyer.com/goals.  

A year ago our worlds were rocked with the news of our pregnancy. We immediately captured all those feelings (and more) in a podcast episode (EP 38) that later became our pregnancy announcement. Fast forward to now where we listen back on that episode. We reflect on where we were mentally, and where we are now... and you can bet there were some tears shed (again)!    

In this weeks episode, we discuss why we are taking a different approach with our goals this year after struggling in 2019 to accomplish all we set out to do. We share a few goals and how they have a similar destination as last year, but how we plan to get there is different. We are focusing more on the journey this year. We are taking things slow. We are working through some stuff over here.

We share another couple of takes in this episode where each of us shares a take on something going on in the world. Our takes this episode are about people from across the pond. Ashley talks about Harry and Meghan making an important decision for their family. Billy talks about not understanding people investing money in the MMA fight with Conor McGregor who is an all around horrible person. Let us know if you agree or disagree with our takes.

Last episode we looked back on 2019, which was a challenging year for us. It ended up being our best year ever. In this episode, we look forward to 2020, a new year and decade. We are in a much different place now. We answer some questions we reflected on during our planning retreat and share our new vision for our relationship moving forward. We know this will be our best year ever yet again! Oh and don't miss Billy sing a little Wicked!

Welcome to 2020! It's a new year and a new decade! We know you are excited. We are too! But before we officially look forward to the next year that we know will be amazing, we look back on 2019. We answer the questions we shared in Episode 64 and guess what? It gets a little emotional because 2019 was tough for us, but it also was our best year ever!

Last episode we shared questions to reflect on when looking back on a year. In this episode, we share questions to reflect on when looking forward to a new year. The questions will set you and your partner up for success when setting your goals for next year! Questions We Shared: What do we/I want to achieve? What do we/I want to create? What do we/I want to do more of? What do we/I want to do less of? What do we/I want to start? What do we/I want to stop? What do we/I want to complete? What do we/I want to experience? Who do we/I want to become?

Can you believe there are only two weeks left in the year… scratch that - THE DECADE! Coming off the #10yearchallenge and the end of the year/decade in sight, everyone is feeling very retrospective. In this episode, we take all that introspection and take it to reflection. We share the what/when/where/how to reflect on the past year and set yourself up for success when setting your goals for next year! What We Talked About in this Episode: The best time to reflect How to “set the mood” for reflecting The key questions to ask yourself to jumpstart your reflection Why you should dedicate the time & other resources to reflecting Ready to start setting goals? Check out of free Goal Setting for Partners guide at bashleymoyer.com/goals. Questions We Mentioned: What did you accomplish in 2019? How did you grow? What are you most thankful for? What did you learn about yourself in the last year? What was your greatest disappointment? How were you hurt? How were you healed? What did you overcome? What are you still working through?

Time to take a trip back in time to our worst year together as a married couple. We have shared a lot on this podcast about how we are better together, that we often collab and how we are great communicators. We have an awesome partnership, but year one of our marriage was not great. It was tough. In this episode, we share why the year was so difficult and how we got through it. We mentioned two previous episodes in this one. The links are below. The Story of How We Met Compromising on Holidays    

In this special Thanksgiving episode, we chat about how we have tried to have an Attitude of Gratitude in 2019 even with the curveball we were thrown at the beginning of the year. We are thankful for each other, our families, our jobs and our new son, Lincoln. We hope to continue having an Attitude of Gratitude into 2020 no matter what life throws at us.

We are back with a couple more takes on topics that have caught our attention around the world. We are a couple and we each have one take on something to share in this episode. We get pretty deep as we talk about the NCAA and playing college athletes and the Rodney Reed case in Texas. Essentially we end up talking about institutional racism. 

We are two months into parenthood and have learned a lot about our ourselves and how we make a powerful team of two. There have been a few bumps in the road of parenthood because we have no clue what we are doing… but who does?! In this episode you'll hear a short update on how we are handling our new lifestyle as parents, the ways we collab as parents, and how we continue to push gender roles.  What We Talked About in this Episode: How we are handling parenthood  For two people who did not plan on kids, we are doing really well We continue to integrate Linc into our lives and not the other way around (stay tuned to Instagram for his appearance at a gala this week!) The best examples of collabing as parents In the hospital Night time Eagles games Bath time Church The opportunities we have found to push gender roles

We love setting goals. For 2019, we set some lofty goals for our new business together. We have been checking in on our progress every quarter of the year. In this episode, we chat about our progress through the 3rd quarter. We have been thrown some curveballs this year, but we have made adjustments and we are on track. Our check-ins have been key to our success. Learn more about our progress and about how to have a goals check-in in this episode.  What We Talked About In This Episode: Our 2019 Business Goals Finding out we were pregnant was a curveball, but we have made adjustments and are on track for most goals Goals Complete 2 consulting or philanthropy projects - We are on track to accomplish this one Kicking off one this week Speak together 4 times We have accomplished this already and we will over achieve on this one Made a lot of progress in Q3 Build social media presence Have been a bit inconsistent on this one, especially in Q3 Grow email list by 250 subscribers Adjusted this one during our Q2 check-in Still inconsistent, but made more progress in Q3 Stay consistent with our podcast We have done good with this one, even with having a baby Blog every week We get an F for this one, but in the episode we decide to close strong and blog 8 times before the end of 2019 Host online course We pushed this one to 2020 in Q2 check-in Write book We pushed this one to 2020 in Q2 check-in

We are lucky to live in the great city of Austin, Texas. People often ask us about Austin so we decided to dedicate an episode to the city. But the episode turned into one about how to get connected in a new city after speaking to a friend who is struggling to connect with people after moving away from Austin. This episode more than anything is about connection and moving towards something rather than away from something. What We Talked About In This Episode: We’ve been wanting to do an episode about Austin because we love our city and people ask us about it all the time We moved to Austin at different times We both found a way to get connected We are not music people or outdoorsy people or ACL or SXSW people We are not your typical weird Austinites, but we love the community here A friend just moved to a new city and is having trouble making friends We talk about how to get acquainted to a new city How we got connected in Austin Moving toward something rather than running away The overall theme of the episode Connection We are need to be in a place where we are connected We don't connect enough with poeple anymore

Life has gotten real over here! Our son is now 4 weeks old! This is our first time recording an episode since he was born. In this episode, we share the birth story of Lincoln Foles Alaniz-Moyer. We begin at our 38 week doctors appointment and end with a baby! There is lots that happens in between. 

This is a very special episode as it was recorded straight from the delivery room on the day our first child was born. We thought we would share our hopes and dreams for our little guy who entered the world about 10 hours after this was recorded. We never wanted kids, but this is our reality and after this episode and our Lincoln being born we now realize he was our missing LINC in our now Team of Three.  What We Talked About in this Episode: Our hopes and dreams for our child - Lincoln Foles Alaniz-Moyer We want him to be a good human We want him to be proud of being bi-racial  We want him love traveling We want him to be a servant leader We want him to connect with his community We want him to be a real part of our lives Lincoln was born at 7:50pm on the day this episode was recorded: 9-9-2019. He was 8 pounds and 5 ounces and 20 3/4 inches Check out our social media for all the pics! @BashleyMoyer on Instagram and Billy & Ashley Moyer on Facebook.

It should come as no surprise that we love professional development books around here. And a favorite we have in common is Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni. While many of these apply directly to relationships, we modified the dysfunctions to our relationship in this episode. Tune in to hear more about how absence of trust, lack of communication, fear of conflict, lack of commitment, and little fun impact our relationship. What We Talked About in this Episode: BABY WATCH- Baby Bashley is

Get to know us in a different way as we sound off on a particular issue or event. We each bring up a topic that the other has no idea about and have a free flowing conversation around it. Join us this week as we chat about Andrew Luck doing "such a millennial thing" by retiring at 29 years old and the lack of creativity in movies and TV. What We Talked About in this Episode: BABY WATCH- Baby Bashley is 3 weeks from his due date and looking healthy. We are hoping for an early exit so Ashley can enjoy sleeping on her stomach again Ashley addresses the lack of creativity in movies and TV, but how we as consumers eat it right up ...Lizzie McGuire reboot anyone? Billy brings up Andrew Luck's retirement and a particular tweet claiming his retirement as a "millennial thing to do"

In a previous episode (EP 50), we laughed our way through our pet peeves with each another. We often don’t take the time to sit back and appreciate one another. So this week we are switching it up and chatting about the ways we make each other better. Listen in as we each list off 4 ways we have become #bettertogether. What We Talked About in this Episode: How our previous episode on pet peeves inspired this episode (episode 50) The ways Billy makes Ashley better He keeps her informed on current events Why read the news when you can just ask Billy? He helps her toughen up while recognizing her emotions He knows the right  He helped her find her voice Ashley is less passive and less of a people-pleaser now ...even if she is the stereotypical enneagram 2 ‘The Helper” who focuses on the needs of others first He helps her push her limits in various skills Ashley has a lot of self-doubt going into public speaking, but Billy provides reassurance that she has been asked to be there to share her expertise The ways Ashley makes Billy better She encourages him to keep trying in friendships & relationships he values She gets him to try new things and loosens him up a bit Have we ever mentioned how he created an hour-by-hour itinerary for our honeymoon?! She pushes him to more often step up as a leader She opened his perspective on diversity issues in the US

We often talk about our shared passion for education and learning. But finding your passions and purpose isn't always easy. In this episode, we share our four steps for uncovering your passions & purpose. We discuss how going through these steps has helped us discover our own purpose that we are living out daily. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our shared passion for education & life-long learning and where it came from The steps we took to discover our passions & purpose Examining your talents and abilities - What gifts have you been given? Ashley cares for people and connects with them Ashley is a gifted facilitator Billy has a gift for public speaking and writing Looking back on your life story Ashley used to play school as a kid and her dad was the first in his family to go to college Billy started speaking about goal setting at 7 years old Spending time in quiet reflection  This step is the most difficult and happens at the same time as the first two steps Billy shares how a car accident helped him better understand this step Finding a coach or mentor Coaches you pay for, mentors are usually free These people help guide you and hold you accountable Billy wrote a whole book about purpose called Retreat to Success: Living Your Life on Purpose. Email us a Collab@BashleyMoyer.com for a free copy!

We're getting a bit personal this week! We all have pet peeves about the people we love the most and we are opening up about our biggest annoyances with each other. Luckily, we both took the conversation in good stride and giggled our way through this episode. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Completing a full year of this podcast and a few changes we plan on making Occasionally, we will throw in an episode that shares a little bit more about us personally & our relationship - like this week! Billy's pet peeves about Ashley  Her lack of concept of time Her lack of communication when she is out and about She loves to putz around! Ashley's pet peeves about Billy His obsession with being early to everything  His impatience while driving His inability to give an opinion on dress/attire

It’s our 1 year podcast-iversary! One goal we succeeded with was keeping up with this podcast- yay! Some other goals did not fare as well. In this week’s episode, we chat about not hitting goals and what to do when this happens. Grab our download to guide you through this process at bashleymoyer.com/goalsrevisited. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our failure to meet some of our 2019 goals The process we use to assess our progress to our goals - Reflect, Examine, Adjust Billy slides into coach mode and walks Ashley through our process

Despite some big life changes, we impressed ourselves with our Q1 progress towards our goals. But how did we do in Q2? In this week's episode, we look back at April, May, and June and our progress towards our goals and we update you on those big life changes. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: An update on what we've been up to We're still processing bringing in a little one in September We moved to the suburbs! We travelled to Philly and Hawaii (babymoon)  Our progress towards our 2019 goals Complete 2 consulting or philanthropy projects  Speak together 4 times Build social media presence Grow email list to 1,000 subscribers Stay consistent with our podcast Blog every week Host online course Write book

Strong marriages come down to great partnerships. But since starting our business, we've noticed a few things we do differently as partners in business in addition to being partners in life. Join us as we talk through a few instances where we have noticed ourselves operating differently than before. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com.

Ask and you shall receive - This week is a listener request! We are a little surprised it took us this long to dedicate an episode to our favorite personal & professional books. This week, we share each of our 3 favorite books, when we first read them, and the impact they have left on us. What books have made a significant impact on you? Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Billy's favorite books As a Man Thinketh by James Allen The Leadership Challenge by James Kouzes and Barry Posner Mindset by Dr. Carol Dweck Ashley's favorite books Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni The Turnaround by Billy Moyer

Thank you notes, awards, and words of affirmation. All of them are various forms of recognition. But what do you do when you feel undeserving or oppositely, when ego gets inflated? Listen in as we chat about the various forms of recognition, how we handle it, and how we make sure we give it right back out. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: The different types of recognition How we handle recognition That pesky Imposter's Syndrome and why we now think it's all fake (hint: it means you're spending too much time focusing on others' accomplishments The good and bad side of recognition A challenge to you - who is someone you can thank or recognize in your life?

Routines. When we are following them, life is good. Right now our life is chaos and we are making it worse because we have not routines. In this episode, we discuss some of the causes for this, the areas of our life most needing a routine, and our solutions and some new routine ideas. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Some causes for our lack of routines We are still processing being pregnant We recently moved (see above) Ashley also moved offices The areas of our life needing new routines and our solutions   Commuting Looking an entire week out Leave earlier Our business, Bashley Collaborative Utilizing the extra time in the car for planning Ultimately, we need to improve communication as we settle into our new place and new news!

Turn-down. Brush off. Nix. No matter how you say it, rejection is never a fun thing to experience. Sometimes you can control it and other times you cannot. In this episode, we share some of our first experiences with rejection, some recent ones and our ways to try and overcome it. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our early experiences with rejection For Billy, being rejected from his top choice college For Ashley, it was being rejected (and rejecting) new classmates after moving More recent rejections Our first proposal under our business Bashley Collaborative Difficulty reaching out to a sibling due to fear of rejection Job and board applications Tips for overcoming rejection Let yourself feel those initial emotions (anger, sadness, etc,), but recognize that you have to pull yourself out of it Remember that some situations you can control and others you cannot Don't let the fear of rejection paralyze you from taking action

Working with your spouse is not something to take likely. There's seeds that get planted along the way. And a strong foundation can lead to a successful business and marriage. In this episode, we reflect on the seeds that were planted that set us up to want to jump into business together. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our early influences The example Billy's parents set as volunteer youth ministers Early relationship How we grew from supporting one another to working together Supporting each other in each of our jobs Collabing on various philanthropic projects Every marriage is a working marriage Every (strong) couple is constantly working together to ensure their marriage continues and is healthy

Ego is a dirty little word and we are dedicating an entire episode to it. We recently noticed others disguising their self-serving actions as the acts of a servant leader. We then challenged ourselves to look inward and determine how our egos affect us. In this episode, we discuss the dirty side of our egos, what our ugly egos look like, the ways it affects our relationship, and how it impacts others and our leadership. Plus for some reason, Billy snorts in the middle of this episode. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Examples of ego and self-serving leadership The ways ego interferes with our relationship For Billy, its putting himself into every situation and giving advice or a coaching session when Ashley shares a struggle or issue For Ashley, it's an inability to apologize when in the wrong out of fear of looking like the lesser person Why Billy snorts in the middle of a podcast episode How ego disables us as leaders Our shared “my way or the highway” mentality that possible stems from an egotistical view of being the smartest person in the room Reminding ourselves why we are doing what we do For Ashley, is it for praise? For Billy, is it for power? What reality star reminds Ashley of Billy Hint: They have a massive ego

We talk a lot about goals, action, and achievement on this podcast. But we are human. There are things that hold us back from being our best selves. Rather than pointing the finger at external obstacles, we are looking inwards and sharing the ways we hold ourselves back. There is lots of vulnerability in this episode. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Looking at external factors that gold you back is easy, but it’s hard to look internally The biggest obstacle to every goal is yourself The ways we hold ourselves back For Billy, it is thinking too far in the past He overanalyzes his past actions and their impact on the present For Ashley, it is being too concerned with what others perceive There is an interesting balance of managing credibility and maintaining humility For or us together, it is being too comfortable with one another We fall into our roles and do not challenge ourselves

Back in episode 38, we discussed some changes with our plans for 2019. But just how much did those changes affect our progress on our 2019 goals? In this week's episode, we take you through each of our joint goals & action steps and grade our progress over the last quarter. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Our 2019 started off really strong, but come February we were thrown a major curveballs The effects of this curveball on our work habits Our progress towards our 2019 goals Complete 2 consulting or philanthropy projects Speak together 4 times Build social media presence Grow email list to 1,000 subscribers Stay consistent with our podcast Blog every week Host online course Write book

In this episode of I Do, We Do, we re-do one of most popular episodes. We each share and discuss 10 new dreams and work them out together in order to add to our official combined Dream List. We love dreaming and setting goals. Hopefully hearing us go through this process will show you just how simple it is. Click here for a free Goal Setting for Partners download. What We Talked About in this Episode: We each share and discuss our 10 dreams Ashley’s Dream List See the Northern lights Take a trip with both sets of parents... and pick up the tab Take an immersion trip into a cultural trip (like SBE) Learn Spanish Make a large philanthropic gift somewhere Own property = (i.e.  owning a building downtown, a chunk of land, etc.) Have an impact on education policy; provide a lot of testimony like policy change locally, at the state, or national level Speak to a large group of people (thousands) Make a career change for the challenge Host an international exchange student Billy’s Dream List Live in Center City Philadelphia Go to the Kentucky Derby Live in another country Write a novel (wrote 4 business leadership related books) Star in a musical Own a Philly sports team Make a 6 figure donation Play a basketball game in the Palestra arena in Philadelphia Have a beer with Chase Utley Run for political office “We talk a lot about our problems, we complain a lot about our problems, but rarely will people step up and do something to put a stop that problem. Added to Combined Dream List Take a vacation with both sets parents... and pick up the tab Spend a significant amount of time in another country to culturally immerse ourselves See the northern lights Go to Kentucky Derby Learn Spanish Speak to a large crowd together → turn into a goal Make a 6 figure gift House an international student “Have an open-mind. Be excited for your partner’s dreams. Push them. It’s okay to question them a little bit, but don’t tear them down right away.” Ashley is motivated by Will Smith’s recent YouTube video, because he preaches the importance of how you should do things that scare you so that you’ll grow   “If you can be disciplined and write down everything you truly want to do and discuss it with your partner, it leads to a lot of “ah-hah” moments.” “It’s not about whether you need more of in life, because you should be happy with who you are and where you are. This is about whether or not you want something more and if you want more then you really are searching for growth.”

We put together our best plan ever for 2019. We got off to a great start crossing off action items for our most important goals. We were holding each other accountable. We were communicating. We were collaborating. We knew for sure 2019 was our year. And then our plans changed. In this episode, we share what happened to change our plans for 2019. This is a must listen episode!

In this episode, we do a re-do of one of our most popular episodes. Goal Setting! We share why we set goals and how. We believe setting goals together ensures that we are always growing together rather than apart. Billy has a long history with goal setting. Ashley drank the kool-aid and together we consider setting and achieving goals one of our greatest and most important collabs. Download a free goal setting lesson for partners at BashleyMoyer.com/goals. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: Billy went through his first goal setting program when he was just four-years-old He has continued learning about goal setting and teaching others about the subject ever since Paul J. Meyer, the founder of the personal development industry said, “If you are not making the progress you would like to make and are capable of making, it is simply because your goals are not clearly defined.” Goals bring out the best in us. Ashley shares the story of Billy asking her about her goals and sharing his goals when they first met Some companions from Billy’s past were turned off by this, but Ashley was intrigued and of course stuck around to learn more Ashley shares more about her own personal thoughts on goal setting and how they have changed with Billy Ashley is go with the flow, Billy is the planner But we both enjoy setting goals. The goal setting process begins with a Dream List This is how we got started goal setting together and they continue adding to their list every year. A Dream List is exactly what it sounds like. Some call it a bucket list. This is simply all the things you want to do in your life together. Next comes creating a short list of goals - no more than 10 We do this every year as well. We start by setting individual goals and then coming together for a date night to share the goals and work on our combined list. Through this process especially, it is important that we fully support one another. There are no stupid goals. This should be a real discussion. What do we really want to accomplish together over the next year? What are the benefits of the goal? What obstacles stand in our way? What steps need to be taken to achieve it? Set challenging goals together that are realistic There are no unrealistic goals just some really bad target dates. Goal setting is supposed to be uncomfortable. Goal setting begins with an awareness of where you are right now and a desire to change your future together Goals are a prelude to action, they are a course to take; they are an expression of your strengths; they are an exercise of your desire for becoming better together Growing together is a choice all partners must make Growing apart is an excuse.

Mental-health day or self-care? We millennials love to develop our own phrases for everything. Either way you call it, it is something we practice regularly. In this episode, we discuss what self care is and what it isn't, what we do separately to practice self-care,  and what we do together to practice what we call "together care." Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: What self care is/isn’t It is not just doing something for yourself It's an activity that puts you in a better mind place, zen out, Self-care solo What Ashley does Blowouts Journaling What Billy does Reading Self care together Travel/trips Spas Walks/workouts Conversations, listening to each other Listening to Audible together Couples who self care together stay together Did we just coin Together-Care?

We just celebrated International Women's Day, so we're approaching everyone's favorite topic… gender norms. Before we met, there’s so many norms we fought. But once we got married, we took this to another level. We love identifying as a modern couple, but we are not perfect. In this episode, we share our opinions on gender norms, identify the norms we fight, and the ones we fall right in to. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode Our perspective on Gender Norms Awareness is key How we fight some gender norms Ashley choose to hyphen her last name after marriage, and now Billy wishes he would have done the same We hold each other's careers with equal importance, Ashley even held the title if “breadwinner” for several years Billy likes “girly” things - Musicals, Chick flicks, spas/pampering,   Ashley likes sports! How we play into other norms Through our enneagram episode, we learned our personalities play right into the stereotypical roles of “mom & dad” Chores - She does dishes, he takes out the trash

They are the ultimate #relationshipgoals (even if they hate the title)... Michelle and Barack Obama. We are feeling very inspired after seeing Michelle on her Becoming book tour. In this episode, we provide a recap on her book tour, why we find this couple so inspiring, and how we are BECOMING better together using them as an example. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: There are a lot of couples we look up to - Our parents first and foremost. We have interviewed them before. They have 82 years of marriage between them! Famous Duos - We have talked about three famous power couples before - Chip and Joanna Gaines, Julie and Zach Ertz and Beyonce and Jay Z. #RelationshipGoals - Michelle and Barack Obama Becoming Book Tour comes to Austin We recap the event Perception of Austin from Rachel Ray and Michelle Michelle talked about the pressure of #RelationshipGoals and how they are no different from any other couple. They have worked hard on their relationship to get to where they are. It hasn’t always been pretty and it has never been easy Remembering it comes it waves Couple to admire bc they are both hard workers, but know how to let loose Traditional roles since presidential run How we are Becoming better together Becoming requires overcoming

It is official, we have a newborn business! When we started this podcast, we had no plans that this collab would turn into a business centered on collaboration. In this episode, we discuss what inspired us to start a business together, give a short update on where we are in our business, and some of challenges with starting a business with your spouse. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode Why we decided to start a business together when we had already done so much work together Our business is a consulting agency centered around collaboration Bashley Collaborative is officially an LLC We have a handful of projects we are working on ...and we got our first rejection! The fun parts about starting a business with your spouse The challenges when starting a business with your spouse

We’re revisiting the Enneagram! The ever popular Enneagram is back on our minds but we’re focusing on what it's like to work with a Type 8 (Billy) and a Type 2 (Ashley). We talk through a few characteristics typical of a Type 8 (The Challenger) & Type 2 (The Helper), how they relate to each of us, and how we work around these traits and embrace them to be a powerhouse team of two. Music “Sunny” by Bensound.com. What We Talked About in this Episode: A recap on our enneagram types Billy is a Type 8: The Challenger Ashley is a Type 2: The Helper These types are more similar than they seem both desire impact & influence but have different ways about achieving it Type 8 is direct and results oriented Type 2 is people-oriented and altruistic Type 2 is nicknamed The Helper and it couldn’t describe Ashley more perfectly. She has built her career on helping others and takes this on in her personal life too. Type 8 loves to challenges but loves to give other the opportunity to be challenged and convinces others to take on challenges Ashley often tells Billy when she convincible When we started this podcast, Billy always asked “What’s the end result?” to which Ashley responded “Just to have fun.” Later, he convinced her to start business which they officially started in February 2019. Type 2 can be seen as a fairy-godmother Unknowingly, Ashley often jokes about being a fairy godmother to the many scholarship recipients of the non-profit she runs How Ashley needs a wand Type 8s love control and hate being controlled, which completely describes Billy Even physically, Billy hates certain positions when cuddling because he doesn’t have control of his body Ashley had difficulty working with this when before she was always the one who was forced to make plans She doesn’t desire control, but likes to fill needs and help others Type 2s are empathetic and are in tune to others, Type 8s like results and often loses emotional contact Billy doesn’t walk into situations wanting to make friends, but recognizes that others might & that’s where Ashley’s skillset shines Ashley often serves as a consultant for Billy when communicating emotions with others Type 2s help others so much, it often is to the detriment of their own health When Ashley gets tired or stressed, her emotions come out. Billy then asks himself, “What can I do for Ashley to help her, so she’s not always being the helper?”