Podcasts about aging adults

The healthcare system is complex and challenging to navigate, especially for seniors and their caregivers, but preparation and knowledge can help you maintain control, advocate effectively, and achieve better outcomes during healthcare transitions.KISMETWhile most assume senior care facilities and nursing homes operate based on modern nutritional science, many still follow outdated dietary guidelines based on the food pyramid, which may negatively impact metabolic health when seniors need more protein and healthy fats for optimal recovery and function.EPISODE SUMMARYIn this episode, master's prepared nurse Cheryl Field shares insights from her 36 years of experience in senior care. She discusses how understanding the healthcare system can help aging adults maintain control during transitions like emergency room visits and hospital stays. Field explains the critical differences between traditional Medicare and managed care options that seniors must navigate when turning 65. She offers practical advice on preparing for healthcare events, including what to bring to the emergency room and how to approach rehabilitation stays positively. Field emphasizes the importance of advance directives, creating a supportive home environment, and embracing a mindset that accepts assistance when needed. The conversation also explores how improved nutrition and metabolic health can benefit both seniors and their caregivers, potentially reducing medication dependence and improving quality of life.NOTABLE QUOTE"A hundred percent of us will experience a sudden change in health. That's just for certain, whether it's one or the last one, but a hundred percent of us will have some kind of sudden change in health."Cheryl Field Contact Infowebsite: https://www.cherylfield.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylfield1621/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cheryl-Field-Senior-Care-Consultant/61564158076135/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cefield50/Send Dr. Ovadia a Text Message. (If you want a response, include your contact information.) Dr. Ovadia can not respond here. To contact his team please email team@ifixhearts.com If you like what you hear, I wanna make it easier for you to take action on your health.Head over to i fix hearts.com/book to grab a copy of my book, Stay Off My Operating Table, and if you're ready to go deeper or talk to someone from my team, just go to i fix hearts.com/talk. Stay Off My Operating Table on X: Dr. Ovadia: @iFixHearts Jack Heald: @JackHeald5 Learn more: Stay Off My Operating Table on Amazon Take Dr. Ovadia's metabolic health quiz: iFixHearts Dr. Ovadia's website: Ovadia Heart Health Jack Heald's website: CultYourBrand.com Theme Song : Rage AgainstWritten & Performed by Logan Gritton & Colin Gailey(c) 2016 Mercury Retro RecordingsAny use of this intellectual property for text and data mining or computational analysis including as training material for artificial intelligence systems is strictly prohibited without express written consent from Dr. Philip Ovadia.

Introducing 'She Said, She Said,' a deep dive into women's health with Dr. Stephanie and her close friend Cynthia Thurlow. Together, they tackle important topics such as the impact of short social media clips on wellness knowledge and the universal frustration of midlife weight gain.Episode Overview (timestamps are approximate):(0:00) Intro/Teaser(12:00) Adapting Diets in Menopause(23:00) Navigating Menopause and Beyond(32:00) Maximizing Protein Intake for Aging Adults(44:00) How to Handle Stress in Menopause(48:00) Optimizing Workouts During Menopause(58:00) Coffee and Pre-Workout TipsResources mentioned in this episode are available at https://drstephanieestima.com/podcasts/ep414/We are grateful our sponsors:TIMELINE - Improve energy at the cellular level with Mitopure. Save 10% at https://timelinenutrition.com/better with code BETTER.CREATE - If your goal is to be more of a muscle mommy and simultaneously tackle brain fog and fatigue, visit https://trycreate.co/DRSTEPHANIE and use code DRSTEPHANIE for 20% off your purchase.ONESKIN  - Use the power of peptides for firmer, glowing skin. Save 15% at https://oneskin.co/better with code BETTER.PRIMEADINE  - Support memory, hormones, and hair growth. Save 15% at https://OxfordHealthspan.com/DrStephanie with code DrStephanie15.

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In this episode of "Next Steps 4 Seniors: Conversations on Aging," host Wendy Jones discusses the critical topic of medication management for aging adults. Wendy, along with an unnamed speaker, highlights the complexities and risks of managing multiple medications, including memory issues and pharmacy. They share real-life stories to illustrate the dangers of improper medication use and emphasize the importance of collaboration with healthcare providers. Wendy advises consulting pharmacists for potential drug interactions and maintaining updated medication records. The episode aims to provide practical tips to help families ensure the safety and well-being of their aging loved ones. Have questions or suggestions? Call 248-651-5010 or email hello@nextsteps4seniors.com. For podcast topics or sponsorship opportunities, contact marketing@nextsteps4seniors.com. Don’t forget to subscribe, follow, and share on your favorite podcast platform. Visit NextSteps4Seniors.com to learn more and explore additional resources. Let’s take the next steps together! This episode is proudly sponsored by Aeroflow Urology, a leader in incontinence care solutions. You may be eligible to receive your incontinence supplies at no cost through your insurance, delivered discreetly and directly to your door. *Some exclusions apply Visit aeroflowurology.com/ns4s to learn more and see if you're eligible.Learn more : https://nextsteps4seniors.com/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sensi.AI's 24/7 Care Copilot provides home care businesses a 360-degree understanding of a senior's physical, emotional, and cognitive needs, empowering them to age safely in place.

In this insightful episode, we explore the mental health challenges and opportunities for aging adults with our guest, Laura Lynn Maurice. Laura shares her personal and professional journey, which led her to create Silver Savvy—a platform designed to support aging adults and their families with resources that prioritize dignity, independence, and well-being. Together, we delve into the evolving mental health needs of older adults, the impact of isolation, and how fostering community connections can be key to maintaining mental wellness. About the Guest: Laura Lynn Maurice is the founder of Silver Savvy, a platform dedicated to empowering aging adults and their families with curated products, services, and educational resources. With a background in financial services and experience in home care, Laura's mission is to transform the conversation around aging and provide innovative solutions to improve the lives of older adults. At 60 years old herself, Laura is not just advocating for change—she's living the journey. Reach: https://silversavvy.com/contact/  Key Takeaways: Aging adults often face social isolation, which can deeply affect their mental health. Cognitive decline isn't inevitable, but it can be influenced by lifestyle, activity levels, and mental engagement. Chronic illnesses and mobility challenges can limit social interaction and physical activity, further impacting mental wellness. Community and connection are essential for maintaining mental acuity and emotional well-being in later life. Aging adults need resources that are specifically designed for their needs, offering independence and dignity. One Key Learning: The importance of community in aging—staying socially connected and engaged can significantly enhance mental health and prevent cognitive decline. It's not just about aging in place, but aging with purpose and relationships that nurture the soul.   Want to be a guest on Healthy Mind, Healthy Life? DM on PM - Send me a message on PodMatch, •⁠  ⁠DM Me Here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/avik  •⁠  ⁠Subscribe To Newsletter: https://healthymindbyavik.substack.com/ •⁠  ⁠Join Community: https://nas.io/healthymind Stay Tuned And Follow Us! •⁠  ⁠YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@healthymind-healthylife •⁠  ⁠Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/podhealth.club/  •⁠  ⁠Threads - https://www.threads.net/@podhealth.club •⁠  ⁠Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/podcast.healthymind •⁠  ⁠LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/newandnew/ #podmatch #healthymind #healthymindbyavik #wellness

What does it take to advocate effectively for ourselves and our loved ones as we navigate the complexities of aging and healthcare? My guest is Cheryl Field, a seasoned professional with over three decades in nursing, specializing in rehabilitation and post-acute care. Cheryl's journey is in healthcare with a focus on quality, compliance, and patient advocacy. With roles ranging from clinical director to Chief Product Officer, and speaking at state and national conventions, Cheryl brings a wealth of knowledge and a unique perspective to our conversation today. Cheryl is a two-time international best-selling author whose recent book, Prepared! A Healthcare Guide for Aging Adults, offers a simple yet powerful system of advocacy that anyone can follow. Her approach simplifies complex systems with analogies and personal stories, making daunting topics accessible and engaging. In our podcast, we discussed the vital role of advocacy in improving senior care outcomes, strategies to develop support systems to prevent caregiver burnout, expert insights on navigating the Medicare system, and approaches for simplifying complex healthcare information to empower caregivers in making informed decisions. Thank you, Cheryl!   Learn more at https://www.cherylfield.com/   Thank you to our sponsor Magic Mind. Recieve up to 48% off your first subscription or 20% off one time purchases with code NAVIGATINGTHEWORLD20 at checkout HERE: https://magicmind.com/navigatingtheworld   We are not medical professionals and are not providing any medical advice. If you have any medical questions, we recommend that you talk with a medical professional of your choice. willGather has taken care in selecting its speakers but the opinions of our speakers are theirs alone. Thank you for your continued interest in our podcasts. Please follow for updates, rate & review! For more information about our guest, podcast & sponsorship opportunities, visit www.willgatherpodcast.com    *This episode is brought to you by Gigi Betty co., a boutique gift shop raising awareness and funds for caregivers and care partners. Show now at www.gigibettyco.com. Use the special code WILLGATHER20 for 20% off your order- Just for our podcast listeners!  

Did you know there are some unique differences when working with aging adults who experience concussions? In fact, patients may come to your clinic after a fall and not have the diagnosis of concussion but they may actually have one. How would you know? What would you do to screen for it? What would you treat first? Tune in to answer all of these questions and more! - Concussions in the elderly population often result from falls at standing height, rather than high-velocity impacts. - Symptoms like imbalance and dizziness may be overlooked or attributed to other conditions, making diagnosis difficult. Comprehensive Assessment and Treatment - Evaluating neck pain, vestibular function, balance, and autonomic dysfunction is crucial for managing geriatric concussion. - Strengthening neck muscles, improving cervical proprioception, and incorporating vestibular rehabilitation exercises can aid recovery. - Screening for BPPV and addressing visual motion sensitivity are also important treatment considerations. Monitoring Exertion and Symptom Management - Graded exercise testing, such as the Buffalo Concussion Treadmill Test, can help determine safe activity levels. - Educating patients on pacing activities and using the "gas tank" method can prevent overexertion and prolonged symptoms. - Incorporating breathing exercises can help regulate the autonomic system and promote calming. Interdisciplinary Collaboration and Ongoing Support - Referring patients to the appropriate specialists, such as neurologists or physiatrists, is key for comprehensive care. - Participating in mentorship opportunities, like the NeuroSpark office hours, can provide valuable guidance for clinicians. - Continuous monitoring and adjustments to the treatment plan are essential for successful geriatric concussion management. Check out this episode for more information! 182: Assessing and treating dysautonomia in neuro clients with Jennifer Lazaro, PT, DPT, NCS Learn more about NeuroSpark here!

Dr. Regan continues the series about the lifespan of a relationship and/or household. The first episode focused on dating relationships, and this second episode focuses on sexual intimacy in relationships with an autistic partner.    Dr. Regan's Resources: Empowered Parenting Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians      

Dr. Regan begins a new series about the lifespan of a relationship and/or household. This first episode focuses on dating relationships. The episode provides practical insights and strategies to help you make informed and intentional choices in your relationships, ensuring they are fulfilling and sustainable for both partners. Dr. Regan's Resources: Empowered Parenting Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians      

#BRNAM #1787 | Heart valve disease is much more common in aging adults | Vassilios Vassiliou, University of East Anglia's Norwich Medical School in Britain | #Tunein: broadcastretirementnetwork.com | #JustTheFacts. #Everyday. #AllInOnePlace.

Summary Lucy Kuchta, founder of Quinsight, joins the Blind Level Tech podcast to discuss her work in helping older adults embrace technology. She shares her experience in implementing technology programs for age 60+ adults, such as Connect with Tech and Empower with Technology. Lucy emphasizes the importance of hands-on training and tailoring the curriculum to individual needs. The biggest challenge for seniors is getting comfortable with technology and using it every day. The use of Chromebooks is preferred due to their user-friendly interface and affordability. Leading-edge technologies, such as Bluetooth-enabled hearing aids, can be more difficult for seniors to embrace due to the setup process. Lucy expresses the desire to scale her business and explore virtual reality as a means of providing one-on-one training remotely. The conversation covers topics such as remote tech support, scams, and the importance of protecting older adults from online threats. The hosts discuss the challenges of providing remote tech support and offer tips for avoiding scams. They emphasize the need to be cautious when sharing financial information and to fact-check any suspicious emails or calls. The conversation concludes with a discussion about the Sandwich of the Week segment and upcoming events. Takeaways Hands-on training and tailored curriculum are crucial for helping older adults embrace technology. Getting comfortable with technology and using it every day is the biggest challenge for seniors. Chromebooks are preferred due to their user-friendly interface and affordability. Leading-edge technologies can be more difficult for seniors to embrace due to the setup process. Exploring virtual reality as a means of providing remote one-on-one training could help scale technology programs for seniors. Remote tech support can be challenging, but tools like Zoom can help bridge the gap. It's important to be cautious when sharing financial information and to fact-check suspicious emails or calls. Protecting older adults from scams and online threats is crucial. The Sandwich of the Week segment and upcoming events provide additional resources and entertainment. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 02:57 Implementing Technology Programs for Age 60+ Adults 10:03 The Challenge of Getting Comfortable with Technology 14:59 Why Chromebooks are Preferred 22:00 Scaling Technology Programs for Seniors 23:45 Navigating Remote Tech Support and Challenges 24:50 Protecting Against Scams and Online Threats 26:04 The Importance of Fact-Checking and Financial Caution 27:27 Sandwich of the Week and Upcoming Events Thank you for checking out this episode of BLT. If you have any questions for Evan and Kelvin let us know by calling the show at (720) 712-8856. Have a great week and we'll see you next time.

This episode is sponsored by Pisgah Coaching Institute founded by IFS-trained Master Coach, Brian Jaudon. Enrollment is now open for 2025 season! To learn more go to: Landing Page | Pisgah Coaching On today's episode I chat with Cheryl Field, a nurse, author, and speaker who has worked in healthcare for over 35 years. She cared for seniors needing rehabilitation after hospitalization, and later applied that passion to clinical technology companies. International Best-selling author of Prepared! A Healthcare Guide for Aging Adults, Cheryl spends her empty nesting time speaking at grand rounds for clinical teams, local libraries, 55+ communities, and senior centers on a variety of topics related to senior care.  We talk about: How she uses IFS in her nursing work to help heal trauma in healthcare professionals and promote self-care Befriending parts with self-doubt and fear of embarrassment while training for a half marathon  Noticing and getting to know parts Small, intentional acts of joy and self-care for caregivers' resilience Prioritizing self-care to prevent burnout Caregivers should identify what recharges them and prioritize it, even if it means saying no to other requests Recognizing and addressing trauma in nursing The importance of having a plan for managing health transitions, especially for those over 50 Find out more about Cheryl here: CherylField ----- Watch video Clips from select episodes on The One Inside's YouTube channel:  The One Inside Podcast - YouTube Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy: Tammy Sollenberger (@ifs.tammy) • Instagram photos and videos and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger: The One Inside: Internal Family Systems with Tammy Sollenberger | Facebook. ------ Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is currently enrolled in an IFS Level 1 training.  ------ Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. You can purchase it here: The One Inside: 30 Days To Your Authentic Self: Sollenberger, Tammy: 9780967688756: Amazon.com: Books or wherever books are sold. Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website ------ Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott's IFS Stepping Stones Program. You can follow Jack at bonzemusic on Instagram. ------ If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at tammysollenberger@comcast.net -----

Description:In this episode, we dive into the 5 M's of geriatric care with Dr. Jackie Osbourne and Dr. Ken Miller. Learn how these key concepts can enhance the care of older adults and improve their quality of life.Timestamps:00:28 - Welcome back to the podcast00:47 - Introduction to the 5 M's of geriatrics02:03 - Medications: Impact on movement and cognition05:00 - Mobility: Holistic treatment and early mobilization13:05 - Mind: Cognitive function and mental health23:03 - Multi-conditions: Managing complex health issues38:48 - Matters Most to Me: Patient-centered care and goals45:03 - Conclusion and parting shotsGreat news from APTA Geriatrics – the Certified Exercise Expert for Aging Adults course is now hybrid! This means you can get profession-leading knowledge without the travel and extra costs. Choose the hybrid path with online modules and live webinars, plus a hands-on weekend, or stick with the traditional in-person weekends. Either way, you'll gain expert skills to design effective exercise programs for aging adults. Elevate your practice and save time and money. Learn more at APTAGeriatrics.org!Breakdown:Recap and Topic Introduction: Overview of the five best tests for fall risk and introduction to the five M's of geriatrics by Dr. Mary Tinetti.Medications (Meds): Discussion on how medications affect functional movement, cognitive, and physical function. Examples include treatments for Parkinson's disease and mood disorders.Mobility: Emphasis on treating musculoskeletal conditions holistically, understanding age-related changes, and the importance of early mobilization.Mind: Importance of cognitive function in physical abilities and safety. Discussion on mental health conditions like depression and dementia.Sponsor Message: Information about APTA Geriatrics and the Certified Exercise Expert for Aging Adults (CEEAA) program. Learn more about CEEAAMulti-Conditions: Managing multiple chronic health conditions in older adults, such as diabetes, cancer, and COPD. Importance of a holistic approach.Matters Most to Me: Focus on patient-centered care, understanding patient goals and wishes, and aligning treatment plans accordingly.Conclusion and Parting Shots: Summarizing the five M's and encouraging clinicians to incorporate them into their practice.

We cover the top 5 tests and measures every geriatric physical therapist should consider for assessing fall risk in older adults. Join our expert guests, Jackie Osborne and Ken Miller, as they share their insights on the Berg Balance Scale, Single-Leg Stance, Timed Up and Go, Five Times Sit-to-Stand, and Self-Selected Gait Speed. Discover how these essential tools can help you improve patient outcomes and enhance your practice. Don't miss out on this valuable discussion!Great news from APTA Geriatrics – the Certified Exercise Expert for Aging Adults course is now hybrid! This means you can get profession-leading knowledge without the travel and extra costs. Choose the hybrid path with online modules and live webinars, plus a hands-on weekend, or stick with the traditional in-person weekends. Either way, you'll gain expert skills to design effective exercise programs for aging adults. Elevate your practice and save time and money. Learn more at APTAGeriatrics.org!

On this episode we were joined by special guest researcher Dr. Dustin Oranchuk from the University of Colorado. Exploring the associations between skeletal muscle echogenicity and physical function in aging adults: A systematic review with meta-analyses Oranchuk DJ, Bodkin SG, Boncella KL, et al. J Sport Health Sci. Published Ahead of Print. doi:10.1016/j.jshs.2024.05.005 Due to copyright laws, unless the article is open source we cannot legally post the PDF on the website for the world to download at will. Brought to you by our sponsors at: CSMi – https://www.humacnorm.com/ptinquest Learn more about/Buy Erik's courses – The Science PT Support us on the Patreons! Music for PT Inquest: “The Science of Selling Yourself Short” by Less Than Jake Used by Permission Other Music by Kevin MacLeod – incompetech.com: MidRoll Promo – Mining by Moonlight Koal Challenge – Sam Roux

Join Dr. Regan for the final episode of the Powerful Self-Care Series. Rather than becoming the victim of an intense world, constantly in survival mode, learn strategies for self-care. This episode focuses on how to increase resilience in active and effective ways. Empowered Parenting   Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

#BRNAM #1730 | Supporting and Empowering Aging Adults |Seanyea Rains Lewis, MS, Executive Director, Durham Center for Senior Life   | #Tunein: broadcastretirementnetwork.com #JustTheFacts

It can be difficult to navigate all the changes that come with having an aging adult in your life. Do they need to go to assisted care, or who will be your power of attorney. These are conversations we need to have. Laura Tamblyn Watts, CEO of CanAge, wrote a book to help you have these conversations. She joins us to share her tips. Connect with Laura on X/Twitter.

Cheryl Field has 30+ years of experience in nursing, specializing in rehabilitation in the post-acute area with a focus on analytics, compliance, quality, and reimbursement. Cheryl has served in many roles, including Clinical Director, VP of Healthcare, Chief Product Officer and most recently as Group Product Manager.  Cheryl has spoken at state and national conventions for over 25 years on a variety of healthcare care industry topics. She makes learning complex systems easy with simple analogies, relevant and often personal stories to maximize audience engagement. A two-time international bestselling author for her work in You Can, You Will and her most recent book Prepared! A Healthcare Guide for Aging Adults. Cheryl is certified in Rehabilitation Nursing, and recently achieved certification in Machine Learning and Artificial Intelligence from MIT. She holds a Bachelor's of Science in Nursing from the University of Rochester and a Master's of Science in Nursing from Boston College. Cheryl has been married over 30 years to her 3rd grade sweetheart Ted, and has three children Michael, Rebecca and Jennifer.

Today, I'm talking to Dr. Tom Kamber. Tom is the founder and executive director of Older Adults Technology Services (OATS) and Senior Planet. He is a leading expert on aging and technology and has provided award-winning programs for older adults across America.  Jim has taught courses on technology, urban studies, and philanthropy at Columbia University, is widely published in professional and academic journals, and is a co-founder of the Afro-Latin Jazz Alliance which has won multiple Grammy awards. In our conversation, Tom and I dig into common questions retirees have about technology, how to leverage technology like AI to get more out of retirement, and some best practices to protect yourself from fraud and identity theft. In this podcast interview, you'll learn: Why people are so tired of talking about legacy–and why it's making an impact that really matters.  The encounter with an 80-year-old woman who fell in love with dance later in life that radically shifted Tom's perspective and practice.  How to address older people's anxieties, resistance, or discomfort around new technology–and how Tom gets people over the age of 50 to participate in the Senior Planet community. Why Tom believes AI has huge potential to empower seniors. How to deal with common scams including identity theft, gift card fraud, stolen passwords, and relatives who are supposedly in trouble.  Our Market Outlook Webinar is live! Visit https://bit.ly/4bmHkUb to register. Show Notes: RetireWithPurpose.com/435 Rate & Review the Podcast: RetireWithPurpose.com/review

Join Dr. Regan for this second episode of the Powerful Self-Care Series. Rather than becoming the victim of an intense world, constantly in survival mode, learn strategies to become effective with self-care. This episode focuses on how to reduce draining inputs in order to budget your resilience.  Explore Dr. Regan's new Learning and Equipping page and the specific course page for "Empowered Parenting."  Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

How much are you challenging the older adults you work with What biases do you have about someone when you see their age or comorbidities? Are they limiting how much you push them?  Have you ever thought about the consequences of not pushing someone enough?? On today's show we interviewed Dr. Dustin Jones, PT, DPT, GCS about his approach to working with aging adults and how it challenges the norm. He was working in skilled nursing facilities and seeing nearly everyone with the same exercises and plans of care despite varying abilities. This led to a desire to change the approach to care to be about determining what is really possible for aging adults and questioning why we only reserve more challenging work for those who are younger.   In the episode Dustin explores how many therapists make assumptions (often ageist) about what someone is able or not able to do that isn't backed up by research. He discusses the fear that something could go wrong when you challenge an older adult and challenges you to consider what could go right. If you approach it the right way, honoring their system and giving time to adapt, older adults have so much to gain by doing heavy lifting and strength training. The bigger risk for this population is actually to underdose them. People who are stronger and more fit have an ability to overcome more illnesses and stay independent longer. We discuss how to have conversations and set expectations for hard work outs that could lead to soreness or even orthopedic flare ups and how this is actually less risky as a consequence of pushing someone than the alternative outcomes that can happen is they aren't as strong as possible, such as illnesses and chronic conditions from being sedentary.   Keys to success with a fitness forward approach include ensuring the exercises are aligned with the patient's primary goal. If they have pain, address that first but still have the conversation about where you're going. Keep tying the exercise approach back to their independence and functional goals, and help them see the connection. Make sure they know the worst thing they can do is stop. Assure them to keep coming back so you can help them through it.  Dustin runs StrongerLife, a gym for people over 55 and teaches Modern Management of the Older Adult as part of the Institute of Clinical Excellence, or PT on ICE. Learn more about Dustin and StrongerLIfe at www.StrongerLifeHQ.com  Modern Management of the Older Adult - PTonICE.com @mmoa.icephysio @strongerlifehq   

Join Dr. Regan for this first episode of a new self-care series. Rather than becoming the victim of an intense world, constantly in survival mode, learn strategies to become powerful at self-care. The first step is self-awareness which can begin by noticing your fight, flight, freeze, and physical reactions to events and experiences.  Explore Dr. Regan's new Learning and Equipping page and the specific course page for "Empowered Parenting."  Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

Join Dr. Regan for the third and final episode of the Communication Series. This episode highlights ways to communicate while talking about challenging topics.    Explore Dr. Regan's new Learning and Equipping page and the specific course page for "Empowered Parenting."    Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

Join Dr. Regan for the second episode in the Communication Series. This episode highlights ways to use communication to protect and grow relationships.    Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

In this episode of the Fitness CEO, Bryce Henson talks with Bedros Keuilian, they dive into the transformative trends shaping the fitness industry in 2024. They emphasize the value of group training and personal interaction in achieving fitness goals, highlighting the limitations of relying solely on technology like at-home workout equipment. They address the unique fitness needs of aging adults, showcasing how adapting workout programs can significantly enhance their quality of life. Throughout this episode, Bedros Keuilian's confident and direct approach shines, as he offers valuable insights into maintaining personal well-being and business success amidst a rapidly changing societal and political landscape. 00:00 Introduction 01:50 Bedros Keuilian's Fitness Industry Journey 09:55 Horizon in 2024 in Fitness 15:46 Aging Adults and Baby Boomers Market 19:55 Muscle Mass as You Age 21:15 Technology and AI in the Industry 27:00 Business Climate in 2024 33:14 Fit Body Boot Camp in 2024

Join Dr. Regan for the first episode of the new Communication Series. This first episode highlights moments of connection, such as talking in the car, going out on date night, and catching up with a friend. Tune in to hear what to avoid and what to focus on to enhance connection.    Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians      

In this third episode of the executive function series, Dr. Regan discusses sticking, releasing, and switching gears in everyday life.  Related resources: Podcast Episode: Autism and "Just Right" Podcast Episode: Gaining Momentum for Activities Amazon: Time Timer (I don't receive any income from your purchase)   Dr. Regan's Resources: Zur Institute courses for clinicians Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

It's a packed show today! We first catch up with AT&T and Mynd Immersive to hear about the good work they're doing with virtual reality and seniors. This is incredible work.LG stops by to share the news of its first wireless OLED TV, the M3 Series television – and why this mattersWe learn about taking a ‘digital detox' and how the pair of new moto razr smartphones may be able to helpTech lifestyle expert Carley Knobloch shares some gadget gift ideas ahead of the holidaysI also share a few Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals that has caught my eyeThank you to Visa, Slickdeals and Western Digital for your support on Tech It Out

In this second episode of the executive function series, Dr. Regan breaks down how speed, working memory, and sequencing impact daily life.  I Love Lucy chocolate factory TV clip Executive Function Book Series by Dawson and Guare: Smart But Scattered (children's version) Smart But Scattered (Teen version) Smart But Scattered (adult version)   Dr. Regan's Master Class for Clinicians (Sept, Oct, Nov, Dec 2023) Zur Institute: Master Class   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians          

Do you understand what Executive Function (EF) refers to and why it is important? If you have EF difficulties, have you been diagnosed with ADD? Do you wonder if you have a diagnosis of autism or if you should have a dual diagnosis of autism and ADD/ADHD? Dr. Regan breaks down the concepts and shares about the relationship between EF, ADD/ADHD, and autism.    Executive Function Book Series by Dawson and Guare: Smart But Scattered (children's version) Smart But Scattered (Teen version) Smart But Scattered (adult version)   Dr. Regan's Master Class for Clinicians: Zur Institute: Master Class   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians  

Have you ever considered your life as an aging adult? What do you think will happen during the end years of your life? Some of us dream about the joy of being retired, enjoying family and living a care-free life. However, that's not everyone's story. Unfortunately many older adults don't have many supports to help them navigate the second part of life, which may include chronic illnesses, loss, and limited financial resources. Lynn Walls, founded the nonprofit Heaven Sent Day Care in Little Rock, Arkansas, for aging adults who need a place to go during the day, and to give comfort to their caretakers who cannot care for them full-time. This is not an ordinary adult day care center! Lynn has a heart for seniors and is passionate about helping them maintain their autonomy and their dignity. On any given day at Heaven Sent you may encounter live music, a beauty contest, photo shoots and more. Listen more to hear how Lynn Walls pursued her life's passion to launch her nonprofit and how she has turned into an advocate to fight for benefits and resources for our elders. In this episode you'll hear: How Lynn designed her services to uphold the dignity of her clientsThe barriers that older adults run into when trying to access medical servicesThe differences in generations and how we can learn from each otherYou can donate to Lynn by texting, AGINGGRACEFULLY to 44321 or going to this link: https://gvly.org/s/imZsGA.x57l4gVisit Heaven Sent Adult Day Care at the following places: Website: https://www.heavensentadultcare.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heavensentadultdaycarecenterInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/heaven_sent_adc/

Have you ever struggled over whether to accept an invitation or opportunity? Should I say yes, or no? Join Dr. Regan as she discusses the importance of identifying goals and asking "what might that look like" before making a final decision.    Previous podcast episodes mentioned: Attention Deficit Disorder and Autism: Similarities and Differences Dr. Regan's Master Class for Clinicians: Zur Institute: Master Class   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript: 1 00:00:07,670 --> 00:00:08,520 Hi there. 2 00:00:08,529 --> 00:00:13,520 This is Doctor Regan joining you for an episode of Autism in the Adult podcast. 3 00:00:13,760 --> 00:00:15,029 I'm your host. 4 00:00:15,039 --> 00:00:18,739 I'm also a neuropsychologist, author and speaker, 5 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:24,719 a certified autism specialist and the parent of a teen on the autism spectrum. 6 00:00:25,850 --> 00:00:29,040 You are joining me today for an episode entitled, 7 00:00:29,049 --> 00:00:30,620 "what might that look like?" 8 00:00:30,909 --> 00:00:35,240 One of the things that clients and families often ask me is, 9 00:00:35,250 --> 00:00:39,909 "should we plan on this" or "should I say yes to this?" 10 00:00:40,189 --> 00:00:40,669 Now, 11 00:00:40,680 --> 00:00:48,659 this could mean being the best man at a family wedding or taking a family vacation to a cabin in the woods. 12 00:00:49,419 --> 00:00:53,509 It could mean accepting a full time job in an office setting. 13 00:00:54,299 --> 00:00:55,029 Now, 14 00:00:55,529 --> 00:00:58,509 my response is rarely yes or no, 15 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,270 but rather "what might that look like?" 16 00:01:02,590 --> 00:01:05,519 So before we jump into the topic for today, 17 00:01:05,529 --> 00:01:09,559 we are coming up to the third anniversary of this podcast, 18 00:01:09,879 --> 00:01:19,639 the first episode launched on August 7th 2020 it highlighted similarities and differences between autism and ADD or ADHD. 19 00:01:20,050 --> 00:01:20,379 Now, 20 00:01:20,389 --> 00:01:33,279 this premiere episode is one of the most popular of the podcast and I plan to expand this topic into a series after today's episode which will further define executive function, 21 00:01:33,550 --> 00:01:41,050 its presentation in autism and ADD, and resources for harnessing the power of executive function. 22 00:01:42,199 --> 00:01:43,089 Secondly, 23 00:01:43,099 --> 00:01:46,930 I want to inform clinicians about an upcoming master class. 24 00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:52,069 I'm offering through Zur Institute about autism across the lifespan. 25 00:01:53,190 --> 00:02:04,459 I received so many emails and messages through my website about people seeking autism informed clinicians to provide them with diagnostic input information, 26 00:02:04,470 --> 00:02:08,919 education and solutions for roadblocks they may have encountered. 27 00:02:09,649 --> 00:02:17,270 So the bottom line is that more clinicians are needed to serve individuals who are searching for this specialization. 28 00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:28,779 And my response has been to offer multiple courses through Zur Institute. It's a continuing education site for clinicians. 29 00:02:29,330 --> 00:02:36,809 My goal is to equip clinicians across various regions to assist individuals in their communities. 30 00:02:36,860 --> 00:02:39,320 When this type of service is needed, 31 00:02:39,979 --> 00:02:51,729 the master class offering will focus on advanced topics and it starts in September space is limited and I'll have the link in the show notes. 32 00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:55,449 So let's jump into our topic for today. 33 00:02:56,380 --> 00:03:10,369 The autistic individual may have opportunities to accept or decline invitations and the invitation may be to enter an advanced academic program rather than the basic program. 34 00:03:10,789 --> 00:03:13,770 Perhaps the invitation is to travel. 35 00:03:14,429 --> 00:03:24,199 The invitation may be to lead a group such as being the best man at a family wedding or presenting research to professionals. 36 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:33,619 My experience is that there's value in viewing the invitation not so much as a yes or no question. 37 00:03:33,889 --> 00:03:35,369 Do I accept this? 38 00:03:35,380 --> 00:03:36,580 Do I say no. 39 00:03:36,759 --> 00:03:38,880 But by asking ourselves, 40 00:03:38,889 --> 00:03:40,410 what might that look like? 41 00:03:41,149 --> 00:03:41,710 A yes, 42 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:47,160 no view would be to see the invitation as a formed and complete package. 43 00:03:47,289 --> 00:03:51,080 So if I say yes to being the best man, 44 00:03:51,089 --> 00:03:53,080 I will plan the bachelor party, 45 00:03:53,089 --> 00:03:54,240 make a speech, 46 00:03:54,380 --> 00:03:55,020 toast, 47 00:03:55,029 --> 00:03:56,509 the couple at the reception, 48 00:03:56,520 --> 00:04:00,869 et cetera saying no to the invitation means I'll, 49 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,440 I won't participate in these activities. 50 00:04:03,990 --> 00:04:05,360 But instead of a yes, 51 00:04:05,369 --> 00:04:06,589 no mindset, 52 00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:11,199 we can often talk through alternatives by asking, 53 00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:12,919 what might that look like? 54 00:04:13,300 --> 00:04:14,990 What might it look like to say? 55 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:15,729 Yes, 56 00:04:16,170 --> 00:04:19,630 in a way that works for me and for the people around me. 57 00:04:22,149 --> 00:04:26,200 The first point to think about is what is the ultimate goal? 58 00:04:26,209 --> 00:04:28,320 What is the desired outcome? 59 00:04:29,779 --> 00:04:36,600 The goal for a vacation with family members may be to have relaxing experiences, 60 00:04:36,660 --> 00:04:43,480 to see natural landscapes that you've never seen and to connect with other family in a meaningful way. 61 00:04:44,829 --> 00:04:50,709 The goal for presenting your research to professionals may be to advance your career, 62 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:57,040 make professional connections with others and highlight your role in the work that's been done. 63 00:04:58,730 --> 00:05:09,549 Identifying what a good outcome would look like is empowering because it helps us identify a handful of core foundational objectives. 64 00:05:10,029 --> 00:05:12,640 And when we work toward those objectives, 65 00:05:12,649 --> 00:05:17,220 we can release some of the trappings that may be part of the activity, 66 00:05:17,230 --> 00:05:23,959 but they're really not core to what we're going after for the individual, 67 00:05:23,970 --> 00:05:26,440 considering a full-time office job, 68 00:05:26,470 --> 00:05:31,089 he may decide that the foundational goals would be to have work stability. 69 00:05:31,510 --> 00:05:34,140 If he's currently doing consulting work, 70 00:05:34,149 --> 00:05:35,200 for example, 71 00:05:35,290 --> 00:05:35,769 he would, 72 00:05:35,779 --> 00:05:45,109 he may want more of a predictable salary and to have his name associated with a company that has a respected reputation in his field. 73 00:05:46,239 --> 00:05:53,489 So the first step you can focus on is determining what would be a good outcome. 74 00:05:54,480 --> 00:06:02,549 What would it look like in this situation to really dive in and also to feel like things went well. 75 00:06:04,519 --> 00:06:10,970 The first step you should focus on is determining what a good outcome would look like in this situation. 76 00:06:11,589 --> 00:06:15,779 What would a good outcome for participating in the wedding look like? 77 00:06:16,140 --> 00:06:21,519 What about going on a family vacation or accepting an office job? 78 00:06:22,910 --> 00:06:32,970 The second part after we've identified what the core features we're going after are those core foundational goals? 79 00:06:33,179 --> 00:06:35,000 We can ask ourselves, 80 00:06:35,010 --> 00:06:36,459 what might it look like? 81 00:06:36,470 --> 00:06:41,559 What might the situation look like that would allow for those outcomes? 82 00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:44,950 So let's go back to the examples. 83 00:06:45,410 --> 00:06:49,690 The gentleman invited to be best man at an out of town family wedding. 84 00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:51,200 Let's call him Joe. 85 00:06:51,790 --> 00:06:54,510 He may realize his instinct is to say, 86 00:06:54,519 --> 00:06:55,160 no, 87 00:06:55,679 --> 00:06:58,809 he knows that he gets overwhelmed in crowds. 88 00:06:58,820 --> 00:07:09,809 He dislikes being the center of attention and he relies on routine and specific favorite activities to remain grounded in daily life. 89 00:07:10,170 --> 00:07:24,489 He feels pulled in different directions because he wants to support his family member and he knows that it's really an honor to be asked to connect with the couple in this way at the ceremony. 90 00:07:25,890 --> 00:07:28,390 So Joe and his family may want to discuss, 91 00:07:28,399 --> 00:07:31,570 what would it look like for you to be best man? 92 00:07:31,809 --> 00:07:36,630 What might it look like for Joe to be best man in a relational, 93 00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:38,899 satisfying and meaningful way? 94 00:07:38,940 --> 00:07:44,929 But in a way that also offers him the freedom and the space to take care of his needs. 95 00:07:45,790 --> 00:07:46,920 So at this point, 96 00:07:46,929 --> 00:07:57,320 there is a commitment to the core goals and there is flexibility with the trappings that might otherwise go along with a wedding ceremony. 97 00:07:59,109 --> 00:08:00,369 In the case of the wedding, 98 00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:02,769 Joe may have a separate hotel room, 99 00:08:02,779 --> 00:08:07,369 so he has a quiet alone space to regroup as needed. 100 00:08:08,350 --> 00:08:20,239 Joe may know that he is grounded and centered when he gets pressure inputs in his muscles and joints and he gets these inputs at home with a weighted blanket, 101 00:08:20,260 --> 00:08:22,339 rock climbing and bike riding. 102 00:08:23,239 --> 00:08:36,650 He's decided to choose a hotel that has a swimming pool and an elliptical machine so that he can get these pressure inputs in ways that will still feel grounding to him. 103 00:08:38,489 --> 00:08:48,789 Joe also plans to use small noise canceling earbuds as needed just to shield himself from some of the noise in crowded areas. 104 00:08:48,968 --> 00:08:50,289 They're barely visible, 105 00:08:50,299 --> 00:08:55,698 they help him a lot and it'll be a step toward really increasing his comfort. 106 00:08:56,940 --> 00:09:00,880 Joe and his family agree that he won't attend the bachelor party, 107 00:09:01,150 --> 00:09:09,630 but still he'll have a time that evening where he and the groom have a private drink together to celebrate the union. 108 00:09:11,020 --> 00:09:18,960 Joe also decides to record a video of him toasting the couple rather than making a live toast. 109 00:09:19,409 --> 00:09:26,979 These things in combination with others really help him or regulate himself to have a relation, 110 00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:33,950 meaningful contribution at the ceremony and to also protect what his nervous system needs. 111 00:09:34,820 --> 00:09:38,260 The main points are that Joe and his family are thinking, 112 00:09:38,450 --> 00:09:39,950 what might this look like? 113 00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:47,789 What do we want to work toward and how can we best get there with a mindset toward getting everyone's needs met. 114 00:09:49,020 --> 00:09:50,140 Similarly, 115 00:09:50,150 --> 00:09:53,250 the researcher invited to present her work. 116 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:54,030 Let's call her, 117 00:09:54,039 --> 00:10:03,669 Susan may avoid the invitation because handling unexpected situations during a presentation is very stressful to her. 118 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:10,799 She also really shies away from being the center of attention and speaking in front of others. 119 00:10:11,409 --> 00:10:19,219 If she does present her goals would be to take credit for her work and to connect with like minded professionals. 120 00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:26,169 Perhaps her focus on what might this look like leads to the following plan, 121 00:10:27,190 --> 00:10:35,840 Susan and her mentor decide to present the information together with specific slides identified for each of them. 122 00:10:36,559 --> 00:11:02,320 So this plan allows Susan to have an experienced partner to guide her through unexpected glitches and it also ensures that Susan can count on presenting specific material but also have expected breaks while her mentor is speaking during the question and answer section at the end of the presentation, 123 00:11:02,539 --> 00:11:13,679 Susan will take the lead on questions she feels comfortable with and her mentor may cue and structure her thoughts by adding prompts like saying Susan, 124 00:11:13,690 --> 00:11:19,400 this may be a good time to discuss your findings in the area of XY or Z. 125 00:11:21,340 --> 00:11:37,650 So what might that look like process allowed Susan to work toward her desired goals without taking an all or nothing approach to all of the trappings that may typically accompany a professional presentation. 126 00:11:38,219 --> 00:11:47,140 So the first thing we talked about was figuring out what's foundational in the goals and then figuring out how to get there, 127 00:11:47,150 --> 00:11:52,770 what might it look like to accommodate these goals and to let some other things go. 128 00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:57,070 The third thing to think about is when to say no. 129 00:11:57,840 --> 00:11:59,729 So having said all this, 130 00:11:59,739 --> 00:12:12,960 there will be times when what might this look like when that process leads to the conclusion that really this is probably unlikely to help achieve our best, 131 00:12:12,969 --> 00:12:14,179 our best outcome, 132 00:12:14,190 --> 00:12:15,369 our best goals. 133 00:12:16,030 --> 00:12:17,479 Um So saying, 134 00:12:17,489 --> 00:12:20,460 no may be the best decision in that case, 135 00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:27,979 although there would be benefits to finding a compromise that meets the needs of multiple people. 136 00:12:27,989 --> 00:12:45,590 The process may be unrealistic in a particular situation and that may be because the individual's needs at that time are so high in this season of struggle or it may be because features of the situation just can't be adjusted. 137 00:12:47,289 --> 00:12:53,179 Let's take the consultants situation who's considering a full-time office job. 138 00:12:53,390 --> 00:13:15,960 Let's call him a the best answer for him may be no if he is in an unusual season of struggle and maybe he's having difficulty consistently getting his consulting work done and to then switch to a setting that would be more challenging for him may really not be good timing, 139 00:13:16,719 --> 00:13:22,520 his needs as an individual may be so far from what the job can offer him. 140 00:13:22,770 --> 00:13:25,729 That the best answer in this season is no. 141 00:13:27,179 --> 00:13:28,309 Alternatively, 142 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:32,619 the answer may be no if he's doing well in his consulting work. 143 00:13:32,830 --> 00:13:42,119 But there are core features of the job that would prevent him from having the flexibility that he would really need to thrive. 144 00:13:42,809 --> 00:13:47,280 He may realize that he would need a hybrid work model, 145 00:13:47,289 --> 00:13:50,280 combining office work and remote work. 146 00:13:51,070 --> 00:13:57,289 He may have the self awareness that working on new business proposals keeps his interest level up, 147 00:13:57,650 --> 00:14:06,549 but he needs help maintaining interest in projects that feel like old hat that the work can get boring very quickly. 148 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:21,630 And the consulting job allows him to pick and choose the types of projects that he does and for things not to get stale if the office job offers him stability in one sense, 149 00:14:21,729 --> 00:14:26,719 but a lack of flexibility to kind of meet in the middle. 150 00:14:27,530 --> 00:14:30,950 He may need to say no to that invitation. 151 00:14:31,330 --> 00:14:33,929 Uh Based on what he knows about himself, 152 00:14:38,130 --> 00:14:42,099 an individual invited to come along for a family vacation. 153 00:14:42,239 --> 00:14:44,090 Let's call her MEREDITH. 154 00:14:44,460 --> 00:14:49,940 She may realize that no is the answer that makes the most sense in her season. 155 00:14:50,799 --> 00:14:53,890 After thinking through what might this look like, 156 00:14:53,900 --> 00:15:02,969 she can't envision any way that realistically meets her needs and achieves the goal of connecting with family on this trip. 157 00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:05,250 For example, 158 00:15:05,260 --> 00:15:14,809 she may have a really severe fear of flying and taking multiple planes is the only way to participate in the vacation as planned. 159 00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:23,179 MEREDITH may realize that her core goal is to connect with two family members in particular. 160 00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:26,580 So her next thought process might be, 161 00:15:27,229 --> 00:15:30,859 I'm going to have to say no to the invitation of the trip. 162 00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:34,429 But how else could I connect with those family members? 163 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:37,849 Even I'm if I'm going to turn down this invitation, 164 00:15:39,489 --> 00:15:55,979 this process of evaluating invitations and opportunities by asking what might that look like can help us identify what our core goals and needs are while adjusting or releasing things that really aren't foundational. 165 00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:59,809 The decisions often don't need to be all or nothing. 166 00:15:59,820 --> 00:16:03,750 Although after thinking through what might this look like? 167 00:16:03,940 --> 00:16:08,150 We might see that some opportunities just aren't a good fit. 168 00:16:10,030 --> 00:16:22,359 I hope you have invitations that help you grow toward your goals and that your decision making process can also reflect your values and your needs at all seasons of your life. 169 00:16:22,460 --> 00:16:24,500 Thank you for joining me today. 170 00:16:24,750 --> 00:16:36,599 The next episode will launch our new series on Executive Function and clinicians ... check out the link to the master class opportunity with Zur Institute coming up in the fall.  171 00:16:36,690 --> 00:16:41,710 I hope you can join me next time for our episode on Executive Function.    

Do you want to live with more intention to achieve your goals? In this 6th episode in a series on Intentional Living, Dr. Regan discusses ways to grow in areas of interest by expanding skills and using free or low cost methods of networking and introducing products or services to others.  Previous podcast episodes mentioned: Shifting Autistic Characteristics Across the Lifespan Autism in Women Coursera (online courses)   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians Read the transcript: 1 00:00:06,019 --> 00:00:06,829 Hello, 2 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:16,920 this is Doctor Regan joining you for the sixth episode of Our Living With Intention series on the Autism in the Adult podcast. 3 00:00:17,290 --> 00:00:20,159 I am the mom of a teen on the spectrum. 4 00:00:20,459 --> 00:00:26,180 I have a doctorate in the field of brain behavior relationships called neuropsychology. 5 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:28,549 I'm also an author and speaker, 6 00:00:28,559 --> 00:00:36,279 a certified autism specialist and the founder and director of an autism diagnostic clinic in Central Illinois, 7 00:00:36,290 --> 00:00:38,000 serving adolescents, 8 00:00:38,009 --> 00:00:40,060 adults and aging adults. 9 00:00:42,180 --> 00:00:45,069 Before we jump into our topic for today, 10 00:00:45,090 --> 00:00:48,250 let's take a throwback to past episodes. 11 00:00:48,619 --> 00:00:51,790 Looking back to two years ago at this time, 12 00:00:51,869 --> 00:00:54,779 I published an episode about autism in women. 13 00:00:55,299 --> 00:00:59,330 It's been one of the most listened to episodes of the podcast. 14 00:00:59,779 --> 00:01:02,270 And one year ago at this time, 15 00:01:02,279 --> 00:01:13,699 we were in the midst of a series about how autism characteristics may shift somewhat across the lifespan during puberty across life, 16 00:01:13,709 --> 00:01:17,879 seasons in women and throughout the aging years, 17 00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:23,569 I'll go ahead and link these episodes in the show notes in case you miss them. 18 00:01:24,989 --> 00:01:25,199 Now, 19 00:01:25,209 --> 00:01:30,139 let's talk about our current episode in The Living With Intention series. 20 00:01:32,319 --> 00:01:37,309 I've named the series Living With Intention because sometimes as humans, 21 00:01:37,319 --> 00:01:53,690 we just kind of get swept up in the demands of daily life or we get stuck in some areas and it can help to pause and consider where we would like to be in various areas of our lives. 22 00:01:54,370 --> 00:02:02,739 And then to think about how to take small achievable steps on a path toward our intention. 23 00:02:03,839 --> 00:02:04,629 And so far, 24 00:02:04,639 --> 00:02:13,050 we've spoken about three areas of life that someone may have goals for such as improving regulation, 25 00:02:13,539 --> 00:02:15,539 that means feeling centered, 26 00:02:15,550 --> 00:02:18,619 calm and psychologically present. 27 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:27,210 We talked about communicating and connecting and also about addressing issues of household culture. 28 00:02:28,750 --> 00:02:29,449 Today, 29 00:02:29,460 --> 00:02:32,679 we will look at the area of interests. 30 00:02:32,690 --> 00:02:44,070 Many people that I work with share that they're so captivated by a certain topic or activity that they would love to expand this in their life. 31 00:02:44,100 --> 00:02:45,500 For example, 32 00:02:45,509 --> 00:02:47,470 if someone is an artist, 33 00:02:47,710 --> 00:02:52,380 they may share that they think they would like to sell designs on Etsy, 34 00:02:54,000 --> 00:03:01,710 another person may share that they are immersed in sewing and this is so interesting and calming to them. 35 00:03:02,210 --> 00:03:09,970 They've developed quite a skill in this area and they're wondering if they could expand by doing some things in their community. 36 00:03:11,270 --> 00:03:21,240 Another may have an amazing brain for sports statistics and wish that they could get into sports casting as a niche in life. 37 00:03:23,399 --> 00:03:23,929 Again, 38 00:03:23,940 --> 00:03:29,149 it's important to emphasize that these are goals that the individual presents with. 39 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:33,800 This is not an episode about what someone's goals should be, 40 00:03:33,949 --> 00:03:37,210 but rather to address the thought of gosh, 41 00:03:37,220 --> 00:03:48,089 I love this stuff and I would love to do more or use it in a way that reaches a wider area or a wider audience. 42 00:03:49,759 --> 00:03:58,970 So how does one start a path toward getting more involved in the area of an intense interest? 43 00:04:00,710 --> 00:04:07,130 So how to get started as we talked about in the second episode on this series, 44 00:04:07,399 --> 00:04:14,979 it is recommended that we take small defined achievable steps in the direction we would like to go. 45 00:04:15,850 --> 00:04:22,579 So one such step may be to gain some additional skills in the area of interest. 46 00:04:22,869 --> 00:04:23,880 For example, 47 00:04:23,890 --> 00:04:29,679 if someone produces a product and they would like to offer the product on the internet, 48 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:39,200 they may wish to get training in things like basic marketing strategies using social media for sales and creating a website. 49 00:04:40,209 --> 00:04:44,359 Someone who creates a myriad of characters and stories, 50 00:04:44,549 --> 00:04:59,209 this individual may want to write fiction books in order to bridge the gap from having great ideas and wonderful creativity to bringing together some stories into a book. 51 00:04:59,239 --> 00:05:03,730 The individual may wish to take a formal course in creative writing. 52 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:07,010 Now, 53 00:05:07,019 --> 00:05:12,209 I know taking a course can feel daunting but a wonderful place to learn. 54 00:05:12,220 --> 00:05:20,209 Some of these skills is on the internet and there are Myriads of free online courses in various areas. 55 00:05:21,209 --> 00:05:21,739 In fact, 56 00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:28,390 there are so many options that I just can't even list the top opportunities in the show note links. 57 00:05:28,399 --> 00:05:29,690 There are so many, 58 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:34,279 but I'll share a few things about learning from the internet. 59 00:05:35,190 --> 00:05:37,279 Have you ever heard of a MOOC? 60 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:41,059 That's M - O - O - C. 61 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:46,750 It's a massive open online course - MOOC. 62 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:54,359 And this is a free web-based distance learning program that's designed for huge numbers of people. 63 00:05:54,369 --> 00:05:59,869 Thus the word massive ... of geographically dispersed students. 64 00:06:00,049 --> 00:06:08,380 So open means that these are accessible to multiple levels of people very often, 65 00:06:08,390 --> 00:06:11,929 these are free and they're online. 66 00:06:11,940 --> 00:06:13,820 So this is all web based. 67 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:21,950 I myself have been a student in several MOC courses to learn things that I can't learn locally. 68 00:06:22,079 --> 00:06:23,089 For example, 69 00:06:23,100 --> 00:06:28,390 I got to take a Behavioral Genetics course through the University of Minnesota. 70 00:06:28,609 --> 00:06:33,429 I took a neuroanatomy course through the University of Illinois Chicago. 71 00:06:34,790 --> 00:06:39,619 And what happens is that you earn a participation certificate from the course, 72 00:06:39,630 --> 00:06:41,079 which is free, 73 00:06:41,910 --> 00:06:50,410 but the benefits are both the information you learn and also having this on your resume as an area of self study. 74 00:06:50,839 --> 00:07:00,309 So the MOOC platforms also have developed paid versions of courses where you earn some type of verified credit or certificate. 75 00:07:00,739 --> 00:07:16,459 And they also have programs that are kind of compilation certificates... like, take seven writing courses and get this advanced writing certificate or a grouping of computer courses for an IT specialization certificate. 76 00:07:18,709 --> 00:07:25,670 The particular site for MOOC courses that I used was Coursera.org and I'll put that in the show notes. 77 00:07:25,899 --> 00:07:29,600 But there are so many sites to choose from. 78 00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:38,549 I encourage you to use an internet search engine for free online courses in the area of your interest. 79 00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:57,809 Another opportunity for learning more skills in your area of interest would be youtube tutorials and also programs like Adobe that offer video instruction to become more expert in their program offerings. 80 00:07:58,720 --> 00:07:59,809 In this context, 81 00:07:59,820 --> 00:08:03,690 you could learn things like video and audio editing, 82 00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:04,609 photography 83 00:08:04,619 --> 00:08:05,399 editing, 84 00:08:05,459 --> 00:08:08,390 how to use website design software... 85 00:08:08,799 --> 00:08:19,959 Podcast platforms like Podbean and others also provide podcasts about how to become and succeed as a podcaster in your area of interest. 86 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:27,609 And they also offer blog posts and articles about all the things their sites offer to support your goals. 87 00:08:27,619 --> 00:08:52,500 So there's a lot of free learning opportunities in the form of videos, in the form of programs that offer their own education about their products and also podcasts that just talk about how to develop your niche in addition to increasing skills in your area. 88 00:08:52,780 --> 00:09:09,849 Another way to take a step toward your goal of expanding your interest would be to start doing some things on a volunteer basis or to provide giveaways or free products as promotions to highlight your work or skills. 89 00:09:10,549 --> 00:09:11,380 So again, 90 00:09:11,390 --> 00:09:14,409 this doesn't need to be the end goal, 91 00:09:14,489 --> 00:09:14,799 you know, 92 00:09:14,809 --> 00:09:18,950 to be volunteering as the ultimate end, 93 00:09:19,299 --> 00:09:28,400 but it can be one step to help you become more comfortable in this area to gain experience and also to get your offerings out there. 94 00:09:30,989 --> 00:09:40,159 Someone who bakes may wish to donate cookies to the local elementary school open house with a nicely crafted sign about their business, 95 00:09:40,169 --> 00:09:42,229 including their contact information. 96 00:09:42,630 --> 00:09:51,179 They could even put a QR code on the sign so parents can scan the sign and save their contact information in their website location. 97 00:09:52,320 --> 00:10:03,489 The individual who loves sports statistics and wants to become a sportscaster may wish to volunteer time to local sports teams as the sports announcer during the games. 98 00:10:04,450 --> 00:10:07,229 This helps the person create contacts, 99 00:10:07,510 --> 00:10:13,479 get used to the tasks involved in doing the work and lets other people see their skills. 100 00:10:15,929 --> 00:10:24,049 There are other ways to use free venues to increase your credentials and get your work out there. 101 00:10:27,109 --> 00:10:30,419 Looking for free opportunities to get involved, 102 00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:32,510 advance your skills and get your work out. 103 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:38,219 There is a really good way to step toward that intention of expansion. 104 00:10:38,539 --> 00:10:39,739 So for example, 105 00:10:39,750 --> 00:10:45,809 someone who's trying to develop creative writing skills may wish to enter their stories into contests. 106 00:10:46,270 --> 00:10:48,960 And once you have a body of work developed, 107 00:10:49,119 --> 00:11:02,169 you might find it fairly straightforward to enter appropriate work in various contests for review and as your work earns mentions or comments or awards, 108 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:06,270 these can be highlighted in your credentials on your website. 109 00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:21,210 Someone who loves making characters and writing may also want to write fan fiction on the internet as a way of using a resource to get their work out there. 110 00:11:23,190 --> 00:11:25,659 For an individual who loves, 111 00:11:25,669 --> 00:11:26,229 loves, 112 00:11:26,239 --> 00:11:35,909 loves running and decides they may wish to do some personal training for other long distance runners locally or in their community, 113 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:42,500 this person may wish to enter races and keep track of these credentials to market their services. 114 00:11:43,030 --> 00:11:47,200 Some races or events may be free and others may have a fee. 115 00:11:47,250 --> 00:11:48,000 But in the end, 116 00:11:48,010 --> 00:11:52,440 this could be a way of meeting people with similar interests, 117 00:11:52,460 --> 00:12:02,169 getting your name out there as someone who's actively pursuing running and training and getting some race placements to add to your credentials. 118 00:12:05,869 --> 00:12:12,099 The important things about these approaches are that they're small steps, 119 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,979 they're toward your desired outcome. 120 00:12:14,989 --> 00:12:22,760 Whatever you've decided your intention is this is where I'd like to be in this area of my life. 121 00:12:23,669 --> 00:12:30,200 And these small steps help you get a feel for what your goal may feel like in the end. 122 00:12:31,190 --> 00:12:32,320 For example, 123 00:12:32,330 --> 00:12:46,000 someone who thinks that they might want to become a teacher will gain a lot of information about teaching by volunteering to teach a course at the community center every Saturday for four weeks. 124 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:53,440 So they get a taste of what it feels like to instruct a small group of adults or Children. 125 00:12:54,250 --> 00:13:03,460 They get a taste for some of the paperwork or the communication demands in between the actual classes and instruction. 126 00:13:04,229 --> 00:13:10,000 Some people who love a particular topic and they think they might want to teach, 127 00:13:10,030 --> 00:13:19,200 end up realizing after some of these volunteer opportunities that the actual process of teaching is not something they love. 128 00:13:22,530 --> 00:13:28,270 Another important thing about this approach is that for some of the options. 129 00:13:28,609 --> 00:13:35,520 There's really not a high demand for in-person contact or being in crowded classrooms. 130 00:13:36,059 --> 00:13:52,239 Some individuals may feel that expanding their interests into well formed skills or offerings is most daunting because they really can't imagine themselves opening a whole storefront or running a restaurant full of people. 131 00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:58,770 But this approach can harness all of the online opportunities for learning, 132 00:13:58,780 --> 00:13:59,909 for creating, 133 00:13:59,919 --> 00:14:05,880 for selling through the internet while engaging in certain community events that you choose. 134 00:14:06,159 --> 00:14:16,099 You get to decide how much uh event based activity do I want to do in the community or how much do I want to travel? 135 00:14:16,229 --> 00:14:23,330 How much customer interaction do I want versus time to regroup in my own space? 136 00:14:26,590 --> 00:14:31,000 I'm a firm believer that your community needs your gifts, 137 00:14:31,010 --> 00:14:32,159 your knowledge, 138 00:14:32,169 --> 00:14:40,070 your passion and whatever area you find that in and finding ways to take steps to your passion, 139 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:42,229 not only blesses you, 140 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:49,280 but those around you and having ways of expressing that also is something that fills you up. 141 00:14:49,619 --> 00:14:50,969 I love creating. 142 00:14:50,979 --> 00:14:51,929 I love writing, 143 00:14:51,940 --> 00:14:52,909 I love running. 144 00:14:52,919 --> 00:14:54,690 I love sports statistics. 145 00:14:54,960 --> 00:15:06,270 We like to have some balanced way of allowing you to learn and grow in this area to feed that passion and to serve your community. 146 00:15:09,030 --> 00:15:16,119 Thank you so much for joining me for the sixth episode of the Living With Intention series. 147 00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:27,099 And I invite you to check out the show notes for links to opportunities mentioned in this episode and for links to other offerings on my website. 148 00:15:27,349 --> 00:15:31,880 And I hope that you join me for the next podcast episode.  

Dr. K covers the latest on COVID in the US now, how to follow COVID levels, updates on COVID boosters, how to know if you still should take precautions, tips on staying safe for the summer, and more.

Dr. K covers the latest on COVID in the US now, how to follow COVID levels, updates on COVID boosters, how to know if you still should take precautions, tips on staying safe for the summer, and more.

Do you want to live with more intention to achieve your goals? In this 5th episode in a series on Intentional Living, Dr. Regan identifies ways to improve household interactions by attending to the needs of the group and establishing traditions and structured activities.    Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript here: 1 00:00:06,139 --> 00:00:06,480 Hi, 2 00:00:06,489 --> 00:00:07,110 everyone. 3 00:00:07,119 --> 00:00:12,170 This is Doctor Regan joining you for an episode of Autism in the Adult podcast. 4 00:00:12,489 --> 00:00:14,970 I'm the mom of a teen on the spectrum. 5 00:00:14,979 --> 00:00:17,500 I have a doctorate in neuropsychology. 6 00:00:17,700 --> 00:00:20,790 It's the field of brain behavior relationships. 7 00:00:20,909 --> 00:00:25,649 And I'm the director of an autism diagnostic clinic for adolescents, 8 00:00:25,659 --> 00:00:29,149 adults and aging adults in Central Illinois. 9 00:00:30,010 --> 00:00:30,459 Today, 10 00:00:30,469 --> 00:00:38,180 you're joining me for the fifth episode in a series about living with intention making goals, 11 00:00:38,189 --> 00:00:43,500 shifting in areas of life to get you closer to where you would like to be. 12 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:55,540 So there were two episodes about how to choose an area of life to target and how to approach change with some specific goals and strategies. 13 00:00:56,009 --> 00:01:02,369 We had episodes about improving regulation and about communicating and connecting. 14 00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:09,629 So today we have an episode focused on household living and the culture of the household. 15 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:10,690 Now, 16 00:01:10,699 --> 00:01:13,250 before we dive into the topic for today, 17 00:01:13,260 --> 00:01:20,519 I want to invite you to check out the resources on my website at adult in geriatric autism dot com. 18 00:01:20,959 --> 00:01:28,410 There are posts and videos for many different types of listeners and learners including clinicians. 19 00:01:29,019 --> 00:01:29,529 Also, 20 00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:31,610 you may find one of my books helpful, 21 00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:32,580 many of you know, 22 00:01:32,589 --> 00:01:39,069 that my first book called Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults is in the second edition. 23 00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:40,589 And if you don't know, 24 00:01:40,599 --> 00:01:44,550 I have a second book called Understanding Autistic Behaviors, 25 00:01:44,559 --> 00:01:47,250 which is more of a workbook format. 26 00:01:47,540 --> 00:01:55,809 So it explains the neurology ... kind of the neurologic-why of some of the behavioral patterns. 27 00:01:55,819 --> 00:02:02,110 And it outlines ways to work toward increased well-being if someone's in a season of struggle. 28 00:02:04,419 --> 00:02:07,430 So let's focus on household living. 29 00:02:07,470 --> 00:02:16,449 So I want to highlight this topic because many people talk to me about the complexities of living in a household with other people. 30 00:02:16,949 --> 00:02:22,330 Most often this has to do with spouses or partners or with couples who have Children. 31 00:02:22,690 --> 00:02:27,350 Not only is the individual trying to increase their own self awareness. 32 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:27,559 You know, 33 00:02:27,570 --> 00:02:29,050 this is how I'm wired, 34 00:02:29,059 --> 00:02:30,529 this is what makes me tick, 35 00:02:30,539 --> 00:02:31,770 this is what I need. 36 00:02:32,059 --> 00:02:33,830 But in a household, 37 00:02:33,860 --> 00:02:41,160 this is really next level awareness because there's now this demand to be aware of yourself, 38 00:02:41,169 --> 00:02:46,289 multiple other people and the interplay between all of the people. 39 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,630 And on top of that, 40 00:02:47,639 --> 00:02:52,100 the needs and interplay change from day to day and from life, 41 00:02:52,110 --> 00:02:53,770 season to life season. 42 00:02:54,789 --> 00:03:00,240 It's so so easy to default to this kind of household interaction. 43 00:03:00,449 --> 00:03:02,039 Stop doing that. 44 00:03:02,050 --> 00:03:03,440 Why are you doing that? 45 00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:08,440 I've told you 100 times to X Y Z. 46 00:03:08,860 --> 00:03:09,800 Oh my gosh, 47 00:03:09,809 --> 00:03:12,440 you are so loud, 48 00:03:12,449 --> 00:03:21,630 messy clingy and guess what this focus on telling people to be different every day is just not that effective. 49 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:27,679 And that's why we find ourselves saying the same things every day over and over. 50 00:03:27,690 --> 00:03:28,770 And not only that, 51 00:03:28,910 --> 00:03:35,339 but these repetitive interactions cause a strain on the relationships in the household. 52 00:03:35,369 --> 00:03:40,940 And they create this kind of adversarial connection rather than a partnering connection. 53 00:03:41,330 --> 00:03:50,050 So the big message is I want you to be different now rather than I want to partner with you to make things better, 54 00:03:50,110 --> 00:03:51,339 better for you, 55 00:03:51,350 --> 00:03:53,839 better for me and better for the household. 56 00:03:54,520 --> 00:04:01,009 So let's talk about some specific areas of focus and strategy that might help. 57 00:04:01,820 --> 00:04:05,509 The first thing we're gonna talk about is focus on the other. 58 00:04:05,889 --> 00:04:06,199 Now, 59 00:04:06,210 --> 00:04:07,690 during the previous episode, 60 00:04:07,699 --> 00:04:14,910 we talked about the importance of expanding our awareness from only what do I need right now, 61 00:04:14,919 --> 00:04:22,100 which actually can be difficult to figure out to what does the other person need right now. 62 00:04:22,399 --> 00:04:24,170 And when we add that element, 63 00:04:24,420 --> 00:04:28,109 we can get away from this push and pull of, 64 00:04:28,119 --> 00:04:31,769 stop doing that to oh, 65 00:04:31,779 --> 00:04:35,309 things might be able to go smoother in this area. 66 00:04:35,660 --> 00:04:42,910 I wonder what the need is that's connected with that behavior and how could I support change? 67 00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:46,109 So as we're talking about households, 68 00:04:46,119 --> 00:05:00,899 this concept of focus on the other then becomes expanded and that makes things a little more complex but also much more important and potentially really helpful, 69 00:05:00,950 --> 00:05:04,730 especially if this becomes the culture of the household, 70 00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:09,079 meaning that this is how we do things it becomes more automatic. 71 00:05:09,089 --> 00:05:13,880 It becomes something that everyone's focusing on as best they can. 72 00:05:14,980 --> 00:05:28,660 Let's imagine that a gentleman who's on the autism spectrum is also a dad and a husband and he's coming home from work after what's been a really draining and complex day, 73 00:05:29,059 --> 00:05:36,130 he's had work demands but also lots of other layers of unexpected changes in his schedule, 74 00:05:36,140 --> 00:05:38,230 detours on the route home. 75 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:43,970 There were lots of sensory overload moments and a disagreement with a work colleague. 76 00:05:44,750 --> 00:05:51,579 So he comes home and mom who is home with three kids is not on the spectrum, 77 00:05:51,589 --> 00:05:55,070 but she does have sensory processing sensitivities, 78 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:56,220 stickiness, 79 00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:58,529 and kids hanging on her and noise. 80 00:05:58,540 --> 00:06:02,600 And she's getting to the point that that has been really overwhelming today. 81 00:06:03,359 --> 00:06:05,149 She is home with three kids. 82 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:21,200 A daughter who is eight has been home from school with the stomach flu but is feeling better and is now running around the house in her tutu singing and spinning and waving her magic wand around an autistic son who is 11, 83 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:25,049 is melting down while doing his math homework. 84 00:06:25,070 --> 00:06:32,630 And another son is 15 and is playing loud music in his room with the door shut. 85 00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,790 So the first approach, 86 00:06:35,799 --> 00:06:41,040 the one that is our most typical go to may look like this. 87 00:06:41,549 --> 00:06:42,899 Dad walks in. 88 00:06:43,059 --> 00:06:46,480 Mom is yelling at her two youngest kids to be quiet. 89 00:06:46,660 --> 00:06:51,549 She's juggling hot food in the kitchen while trying to get food ready for dinner. 90 00:06:52,700 --> 00:06:58,130 The youngest daughter runs up to dad and wants to show off her tutu and her magic wand. 91 00:06:58,540 --> 00:07:03,549 And dad hears the loud music coming from upstairs and mom is thinking, 92 00:07:03,559 --> 00:07:06,059 thank goodness he is home. 93 00:07:06,220 --> 00:07:07,549 I need some help. 94 00:07:07,559 --> 00:07:14,130 I need some relief and dad is thinking I can't wait to get out of here and go for my bike ride. 95 00:07:16,299 --> 00:07:23,519 So mom and dad get in a fight about how he comes home and goes off by himself and she's been there all day, 96 00:07:23,529 --> 00:07:24,309 et cetera. 97 00:07:25,209 --> 00:07:28,279 So dad feels the pressure to make things right. 98 00:07:28,510 --> 00:07:30,950 He yells at his oldest son saying, 99 00:07:30,959 --> 00:07:34,070 why don't you turn off your music and come down and help your mother. 100 00:07:34,390 --> 00:07:40,850 And he yells at the middle son and says that math really isn't that hard and he should stop crying. 101 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:55,970 We all get that right like we are at the end of our rope and we just want to make the chaos stop and calm down and we want other people to do their part. 102 00:07:58,119 --> 00:08:00,250 Let's think about a second approach. 103 00:08:01,019 --> 00:08:17,299 This is increased awareness that all of these people have really legitimate needs and a realization that there needs to be a way to figure out what they are and then to try to work together to do something. 104 00:08:19,170 --> 00:08:22,100 Mom is overwhelmed with sensory inputs. 105 00:08:22,109 --> 00:08:26,929 She's drained from the whole day of being the only adult at home, 106 00:08:27,079 --> 00:08:33,700 which means that she has been the go to person for everyone's needs in the household. 107 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:37,588 So she needs quiet alone time. 108 00:08:37,838 --> 00:08:39,598 She needs compliments, 109 00:08:39,609 --> 00:08:41,059 she needs support. 110 00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:44,830 The youngest daughter suddenly feeling better. 111 00:08:45,239 --> 00:08:54,210 She needs to run off some of her nonsick energy and be recognized as someone who's beautiful and magical with her wand. 112 00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:59,330 The middle son has also been very drained from the day. 113 00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:06,080 He gets overwhelmed with the social and sensory environment at school and he has a math learning disability. 114 00:09:06,719 --> 00:09:17,369 So he has gone from a draining environment to a draining environment and he's doing a task that he just knows he can't have success with. 115 00:09:18,260 --> 00:09:21,840 He's unable to get his bearings to calm, 116 00:09:22,059 --> 00:09:23,469 to reenter, 117 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,869 he needs some regulation help. 118 00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:39,880 The oldest son is feeling the angst of being a teen and this comes with easy irritation thinking his parents don't know anything and the loud music releases some of his irritability. 119 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,450 It establishes his identity as his own person. 120 00:09:43,619 --> 00:09:46,969 So that is a lot. 121 00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:51,229 In this case, 122 00:09:51,900 --> 00:10:07,090 it often helps to have some type of planned huddle uh between the couple or with the family about what is the status right now and what do you need? 123 00:10:09,809 --> 00:10:18,659 The huddle is just a coming together to talk briefly about what are we gonna do next? 124 00:10:18,900 --> 00:10:20,820 What's going on and what are we gonna do? 125 00:10:21,979 --> 00:10:26,710 The status is really high chaos for everyone in this family right now. 126 00:10:27,979 --> 00:10:35,590 And sometimes families make up kind of humorous labels for levels of chaos or crisis. 127 00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:50,049 One family might use a color code where a code red is the most chaos or sometimes a movie related code where the most chaos is the Lord of the Rings scene where the orcs come. 128 00:10:51,070 --> 00:10:54,030 The status could also be a factual description. 129 00:10:54,190 --> 00:10:55,340 Bad day at work, 130 00:10:55,349 --> 00:10:57,619 really drained or bad day at home, 131 00:10:57,630 --> 00:10:58,539 really drained. 132 00:10:58,710 --> 00:11:02,919 And I'm at my breaking point at the highest level of chaos. 133 00:11:02,929 --> 00:11:05,309 Both mom and dad really need alone time. 134 00:11:05,669 --> 00:11:06,280 Now, 135 00:11:06,289 --> 00:11:07,820 what do the kids need? 136 00:11:08,450 --> 00:11:08,929 Well, 137 00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:11,000 you may have a quick family huddle, 138 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:12,780 what do you need? 139 00:11:13,210 --> 00:11:21,960 Or the parents may have a sense already of what the kids would probably need to regulate and regroup. 140 00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:27,219 One helpful thing in this scenario might look like the following. 141 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:36,130 Dad could go on his bike ride but also take the 11 year old son who's on the autism spectrum on the ride as well. 142 00:11:37,150 --> 00:11:42,070 They both really feel better after they get some pressure input, 143 00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:45,929 that's proprioceptive input and movement input, 144 00:11:45,940 --> 00:11:47,330 vestibular input. 145 00:11:47,669 --> 00:11:53,450 You can see our episode about sensory inputs for regulation. 146 00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:57,539 And this is why the bike ride is so important. 147 00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:03,200 If we tell dad not to go on the bike ride because the house is in chaos, 148 00:12:03,599 --> 00:12:07,409 he's not going to be able to regulate himself. 149 00:12:07,590 --> 00:12:09,849 So we want a dad who comes back, 150 00:12:09,859 --> 00:12:12,979 regulated centered calm. 151 00:12:13,239 --> 00:12:14,640 Um not at, 152 00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:15,890 at the breaking point. 153 00:12:16,539 --> 00:12:30,619 This bike ride also gives time for their mind to settle and it's a kind of together activity where they actually don't have to talk So it's the thing they like to do and we're together, 154 00:12:30,630 --> 00:12:36,780 but we don't have to say anything and that's very calming and regulating for them. 155 00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,349 Perhaps in this scenario, 156 00:12:40,359 --> 00:12:51,559 mom chooses a bubble bath with headphones and music and gives the 15 year old a task to keep him busy and to acknowledge his independence. 157 00:12:52,200 --> 00:13:01,650 So there's a small corner store about three blocks away and she gives him $15 to walk to the corner store and to take the eight year old, 158 00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:11,119 the eight year old can spin and sing and walk with her wand and he gets to choose whatever he wants for, 159 00:13:11,130 --> 00:13:13,539 quote dessert for the family. 160 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:18,489 He chooses lots of movie candy like now and laters, 161 00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:21,059 Mike and Ike and Swedish fish. 162 00:13:21,070 --> 00:13:25,109 And he lets his sister pick out a Princess Pez dispenser. 163 00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:27,390 Then they walk home, 164 00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:29,330 mom's done with their bath. 165 00:13:29,340 --> 00:13:38,270 Dad and son are home and this is a regrouping time that acknowledges as many people's needs as possible. 166 00:13:38,609 --> 00:13:44,409 And then there can be a huddle at that point about how the rest of the night might go. 167 00:13:46,419 --> 00:13:54,750 But we at least want to problem solve when as many people as possible are more centered and less close to the breaking point. 168 00:13:57,289 --> 00:14:06,520 So this focus and strategy is uh really pinpointing what other people need people in the household. 169 00:14:06,869 --> 00:14:12,479 And it uses the huddle concept to come together and make a plan. 170 00:14:12,849 --> 00:14:14,979 So it's a quick coming together. 171 00:14:14,989 --> 00:14:16,690 It's not like a family meeting, 172 00:14:16,700 --> 00:14:18,739 where we talk through things, 173 00:14:18,859 --> 00:14:21,580 it's what's going on and what do we need to do. 174 00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:23,679 Now, 175 00:14:23,690 --> 00:14:26,760 we all know that this doesn't make everything easy, 176 00:14:26,780 --> 00:14:35,969 but it often makes things better and it creates partnerships within the household rather than really strained relationships. 177 00:14:40,070 --> 00:14:44,280 Let's look at another approach to household culture. 178 00:14:44,419 --> 00:14:51,020 So the second one is focusing on tradition and structure in order to interact, 179 00:14:52,859 --> 00:14:55,090 individuals with autistic neurology, 180 00:14:55,099 --> 00:15:04,099 often prefer structured topic based activities rather than hanging out or sharing about their day or sharing about feelings. 181 00:15:04,510 --> 00:15:10,869 These are typically more enjoyable to them than just unstructured together time. 182 00:15:12,219 --> 00:15:16,950 It might involve harnessing their knowledge about something that they love. 183 00:15:19,450 --> 00:15:25,099 And once you know who in the family really likes this kind of interaction. 184 00:15:25,109 --> 00:15:26,320 And you can say, 185 00:15:26,479 --> 00:15:29,049 I know this is what we enjoy best. 186 00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:35,059 This awareness can help increase the number of nice family memories or interactions. 187 00:15:35,380 --> 00:15:37,239 So for example, 188 00:15:37,250 --> 00:15:46,159 let's take a family um who likes to socially connect at the dinner table by sharing about their day, 189 00:15:46,380 --> 00:15:47,929 how the practice went, 190 00:15:47,940 --> 00:15:49,409 how their soccer game? 191 00:15:49,419 --> 00:15:53,669 Did uh did your friend feel good about their science project? 192 00:15:53,679 --> 00:15:56,809 How is your boss's husband doing since his surgery, 193 00:15:56,820 --> 00:15:57,510 et cetera? 194 00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:02,880 In contrast to another family with neurodiversity, 195 00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:03,359 now, 196 00:16:03,369 --> 00:16:10,299 they may prefer something more structured and less about how people felt or responded, 197 00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:14,119 less open ended or broad questions about the day. 198 00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:15,919 So what might that look like? 199 00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:25,080 This family might start a tradition at the dinner table where they each share an interesting fact that they learned that day. 200 00:16:25,159 --> 00:16:30,159 So perhaps the eight year old learned that most fish don't have eyelids. 201 00:16:30,580 --> 00:16:33,000 The 15 year old learned that on average, 202 00:16:33,010 --> 00:16:36,739 every person on earth owns 86 Lego Bricks. 203 00:16:40,210 --> 00:16:42,320 Let's look at another example. 204 00:16:42,330 --> 00:16:44,059 Let's take a spouse. 205 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:56,059 We're looking at a woman who feels dissatisfied because her husband doesn't engage in conversations during times like car rides or while at a restaurant and waiting on their meal. 206 00:16:56,739 --> 00:17:03,609 She's realized though that they can have a really good social interaction if it's structured about a topic. 207 00:17:04,250 --> 00:17:12,939 She's also noticed that they have a good time interacting if they take online quizzes or play trivia together during these times. 208 00:17:13,660 --> 00:17:22,630 So the passenger in the car can ask the driver trivia questions and then they can switch and she notices that they really end up laughing, 209 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:24,089 they learn new things. 210 00:17:24,099 --> 00:17:25,530 It works out well. 211 00:17:25,540 --> 00:17:28,380 It's actually a really connecting time, 212 00:17:28,689 --> 00:17:34,829 uh much better than the silence of sitting together without interacting. 213 00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:39,530 Let's take a third family. 214 00:17:39,619 --> 00:17:53,829 This family has teens and it's been struggling because the kids are a bit more moody than they were as youngsters and they're too old for some of the things that they used to do as a family when they were younger. 215 00:17:54,099 --> 00:17:54,380 You know, 216 00:17:54,390 --> 00:17:57,170 they don't like going to the zoo anymore. 217 00:17:58,119 --> 00:18:05,349 This family realized that structuring some traditions for activities has worked better than small talk. 218 00:18:05,359 --> 00:18:13,849 Like how with school they might have a Friday night tradition of board games and pizza or they might rotate, 219 00:18:13,859 --> 00:18:16,530 who gets to pick the Friday night activity. 220 00:18:16,979 --> 00:18:21,810 One teen may pick a movie and chooses the snacks next week, 221 00:18:21,819 --> 00:18:26,089 another chooses a board game and challenges kids against parents. 222 00:18:26,579 --> 00:18:31,229 And the next week mom chooses a Lock Drew mystery for the family to solve together. 223 00:18:32,780 --> 00:18:43,729 So this approach harnesses the fact that individuals with autistic neurology may really enjoy each other within the context of some structure, 224 00:18:43,739 --> 00:18:53,310 topic and activity rather than these loose connecting moments or open ended questions like how is your day and what's going on in your life. 225 00:18:56,209 --> 00:19:00,420 There's so much that goes into the culture of a household. 226 00:19:00,790 --> 00:19:18,670 But these two tips of helping people get their needs met and coming together with structure and topic focused activities can be part of what helps shift things in a good direction for many families and it really protects those partnering kinds of relationships. 227 00:19:19,989 --> 00:19:24,660 Thank you for joining me today to talk about households and families, 228 00:19:24,819 --> 00:19:27,060 protecting the wellness of our family. 229 00:19:27,069 --> 00:19:32,709 Connections can help us feel more supported and resilient overall. 230 00:19:33,530 --> 00:19:42,430 And next time we will round out this series by focusing on adding meaning and growth to areas of special interest. 231 00:19:42,619 --> 00:19:44,219 I hope you can join me then.  

Do you want to live with more intention to achieve your goals? In this 4th episode in a series on Intentional Living, Dr. Regan identifies ways to use communication to create connection and help you achieve the life goals you aim for.   Resources mentioned in the podcast:  Talking About Autism podcast series The Science of Making Friends: book Better Small Talk: book Crucial Conversations: book   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript here: 1 00:00:03,809 --> 00:00:04,659 Hi there. 2 00:00:04,670 --> 00:00:06,679 This is Doctor Theresa Regan. 3 00:00:06,969 --> 00:00:11,510 I'm joining you for an episode of autism in the Adult podcast. 4 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:13,619 I'm a neuropsychologist, 5 00:00:13,859 --> 00:00:19,120 the founder and director of an autism diagnostic clinic in Central Illinois. 6 00:00:19,290 --> 00:00:21,959 And I'm the parent of a teen on the spectrum. 7 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:27,440 Did you know that I did a podcast series on talking about autism? 8 00:00:27,659 --> 00:00:30,420 This was in February of 2022. 9 00:00:30,559 --> 00:00:43,909 It had three episodes where I covered things like how to talk to other people about your journey to seek a diagnostic evaluation or how to tell people that you've received a new diagnosis of autism. 10 00:00:44,340 --> 00:00:53,270 We cover topics about how to process and navigate the emotions of other people during conversations about autism. 11 00:00:53,909 --> 00:01:01,279 And we also reviewed how to talk to someone that you are familiar with --someone in your family, 12 00:01:01,290 --> 00:01:05,739 someone that you know -- about the possibility that they are on the spectrum. 13 00:01:06,089 --> 00:01:08,930 Maybe they haven't thought about it that way, 14 00:01:08,940 --> 00:01:12,319 but you recognize some characteristics in them. 15 00:01:13,010 --> 00:01:18,069 I'm going to put a link to this series talking about autism in the show notes. 16 00:01:18,599 --> 00:01:26,940 But today you are joining me for episode number four in a series about intentional living on the autism spectrum, 17 00:01:28,309 --> 00:01:33,629 we all get into rhythms and routines that have a life of their own. 18 00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:36,000 Sometimes our schedules, 19 00:01:36,010 --> 00:01:37,540 what we typically do, 20 00:01:37,550 --> 00:01:41,440 what we don't do... things that crop up in our lives. 21 00:01:41,449 --> 00:01:56,860 They catch us up in their momentum and sometimes it's just nice to pause and to step back and really see if the life that we're living lines up with where we'd like to be in the future. 22 00:01:57,389 --> 00:02:01,150 Are we choosing this life? 23 00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:07,860 Are we being swept away without really pausing to make some choices and decisions? 24 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:14,639 And certainly we can't have the final say in everything that our life entails. 25 00:02:14,649 --> 00:02:22,020 But we really will be able to capture more of our dreams and visions for the future 26 00:02:22,029 --> 00:02:27,259 if we pause and make choices that line up with those... 27 00:02:27,690 --> 00:02:29,339 those goals that we have. 28 00:02:31,770 --> 00:02:38,740 This need to pause and reevaluate our intentions and choices is a universal human need. 29 00:02:39,470 --> 00:02:49,300 But we're spending some time talking about this in the context of autism because sometimes the individual on the spectrum will struggle more with this, 30 00:02:49,750 --> 00:03:03,759 possibly because they have difficulty switching gears from the typical routine or maybe this individual has problems finding the energy or the momentum to get going with something new. 31 00:03:04,820 --> 00:03:12,910 This person may feel like it's challenging to get out of the hyper focus of the moment and to try to think long term. 32 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:16,889 So in the first episode for this series, 33 00:03:16,899 --> 00:03:25,009 we talked about how to get to the point where you can actually choose a goal that is difficult in itself. 34 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:35,020 We outlined several life categories that you could analyze to see if you would like to think of a goal in these categories. 35 00:03:35,940 --> 00:03:36,190 Now, 36 00:03:36,199 --> 00:03:41,110 the second episode was about how to make specific goals within a category. 37 00:03:41,990 --> 00:03:50,080 So we want the goal to help us shift from our current place and leave the boundaries of our comfort zone. 38 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:58,820 But we don't want it to be overwhelming or self defeating because we picked a goal that's just too difficult, 39 00:03:58,830 --> 00:03:59,720 too big... 41 00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:02,059 feels insurmountable. 42 00:04:03,929 --> 00:04:16,660 The third episode in this series about living with intention had to do with strategies to reach goals within the area of health and wellness specifically with regulation. 43 00:04:17,278 --> 00:04:25,069 And this is often a good place to start in our lives when we're trying to grow and challenge ourselves. 44 00:04:25,079 --> 00:04:29,028 Because if we're setting goals, 45 00:04:29,199 --> 00:04:34,989 this is really us setting a goal to do difficult things. 46 00:04:35,290 --> 00:04:39,399 And if we're not regulated when we start these goals, 47 00:04:39,410 --> 00:04:41,750 if we're not feeling grounded, 48 00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:42,859 centered, 49 00:04:42,869 --> 00:04:45,609 calm and psychologically present, 50 00:04:45,750 --> 00:04:47,880 attentive and rested, 52 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:56,290 it's really difficult to leave our comfort zone in any other area to really have intentional living. 53 00:04:56,619 --> 00:05:04,480 So it is often nice to make sure that we're really well regulated before we jump into any other goals. 54 00:05:05,790 --> 00:05:16,679 So now today you are listening to the fourth episode and we're going to focus on intentional living within communication and relationships. 55 00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:21,399 And you may be asking why do I need to have social goals? 56 00:05:21,570 --> 00:05:22,010 Well, 57 00:05:22,019 --> 00:05:22,950 you don't, 58 00:05:23,149 --> 00:05:30,350 your communication and your social network don't have to match any particular template that others use. 59 00:05:30,420 --> 00:05:32,489 But at the same time, 60 00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:35,619 if you have a vision for your future, 61 00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:44,089 you may need to grow in certain areas of communication or connection so that you can meet the goals that you do have. 62 00:05:45,309 --> 00:05:46,640 For example, 63 00:05:46,649 --> 00:05:52,359 one person may want to become a history teacher because they love history. 64 00:05:52,959 --> 00:05:54,299 That is a great goal. 65 00:05:54,309 --> 00:05:59,600 It's a way of sharing your love of a topic with other people. 66 00:06:00,269 --> 00:06:04,579 But you'll also need to have some skills for communication, 67 00:06:04,589 --> 00:06:08,549 updates with your work team and with your students and families. 68 00:06:08,579 --> 00:06:11,079 Maybe about projects or grades, 69 00:06:11,350 --> 00:06:18,500 you'll have to have communication skills to interact with people who are really upset with you or disagree with you. 70 00:06:19,329 --> 00:06:26,329 Maybe you'll be put in charge of a major project for the school and you'll have to present on the topic. 71 00:06:27,269 --> 00:06:29,600 If you already have these skills, 72 00:06:29,609 --> 00:06:30,709 that's super, 73 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:32,869 you don't need to grow in this area. 74 00:06:33,239 --> 00:06:43,220 But if you don't focusing on this area of growth may help you in the future as you take your path toward your ultimate goals. 75 00:06:44,989 --> 00:06:55,670 Another example would be someone who's just retired and maybe they're finding it difficult to connect or get along with their partner now that they're both at home a lot. 76 00:06:56,190 --> 00:07:01,600 So perhaps this person has a goal to connect in a more effective way. 77 00:07:01,709 --> 00:07:09,320 She may have a goal for communication and connecting in the home with this new life season of retirement. 78 00:07:11,369 --> 00:07:12,309 In contrast, 79 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:15,920 you may be someone who's all set in this area. 80 00:07:16,170 --> 00:07:17,190 But in the future, 81 00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:26,429 you may want to have some things tucked away for different tasks or goals that crop up along the way this episode may be for you. 82 00:07:27,339 --> 00:07:39,309 So let's focus on three things to keep in mind that may help you reach a goal for more effective communication and connection in a particular area of your life. 83 00:07:40,220 --> 00:07:41,350 And let's face it, 84 00:07:41,359 --> 00:07:46,690 you are probably already super good at communicating about topics, 85 00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:47,929 facts, 86 00:07:47,940 --> 00:07:49,149 details, 87 00:07:49,380 --> 00:07:58,790 things like teaching about history or telling your partner that we're out of milk and somebody's got to get this supply at the store. 88 00:07:59,600 --> 00:07:59,910 Well, 89 00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:07,660 the trickier area of communication more often shows up when we're in an interaction and we start thinking, 90 00:08:07,670 --> 00:08:08,250 wow, 91 00:08:08,260 --> 00:08:10,339 what just happened here? 92 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:16,299 What did this person react to in this conversation? 93 00:08:16,309 --> 00:08:18,799 I'm not even sure where they're coming from. 94 00:08:18,970 --> 00:08:21,399 I don't know what this person wants from me. 95 00:08:22,059 --> 00:08:23,109 After all, 96 00:08:23,119 --> 00:08:25,549 I was right about what I said. 97 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:29,429 So why all this emotion or all this up and down? 98 00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:36,469 Let's look at a few areas of focus that can balance out that connection piece. 99 00:08:36,989 --> 00:08:38,070 First of all, 100 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:42,669 I want to introduce and bring more into your awareness, 101 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:45,349 this focus on the other. 102 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:49,210 So when you are communicating with someone, 103 00:08:49,219 --> 00:08:51,409 whether that is a history teacher, 104 00:08:51,419 --> 00:08:55,380 talking to a parent or a woman who's just retired, 105 00:08:55,390 --> 00:08:56,710 talking to her partner. 106 00:08:57,080 --> 00:09:05,799 There is a difference between communication that's factually correct and communication that is effective. 107 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,309 It helps to be correct. 108 00:09:10,020 --> 00:09:13,549 But we also want communication that's more than correct. 109 00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:15,630 We want it to be productive, 110 00:09:15,739 --> 00:09:16,489 helpful, 111 00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:18,710 valuable and fruitful. 112 00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:21,880 So remember what your goals are, 113 00:09:22,369 --> 00:09:36,729 is your goal to strengthen your relationship with your partner? is your goal to be a history teacher? ...and all these other goals you might have where communication and connection are important to meet that goal. 114 00:09:37,030 --> 00:09:52,440 One way to improve the effectiveness of our communication is to be able to pause during an interaction and focus on the other person rather than on the topic. 115 00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:55,710 And sometimes to be honest, 116 00:09:56,559 --> 00:10:03,530 this whole interaction happens and we never pause and we're a bit surprised and taken aback. 117 00:10:03,710 --> 00:10:08,690 And we process things after that's OK too. 118 00:10:09,489 --> 00:10:16,400 The goal eventually will be able to pause and process a bit during the interaction to adjust. 119 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:22,270 But we may start by analyzing and thinking through things after the fact, 120 00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:26,580 focus on the other person. 121 00:10:26,590 --> 00:10:32,859 So ask yourself things like what does this person need from me right now? 122 00:10:33,369 --> 00:10:37,549 Other than being correct about the facts, 123 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:38,150 I'm saying, 124 00:10:38,159 --> 00:10:44,359 what do they need from me in the social conversation? 125 00:10:46,299 --> 00:11:04,739 Maybe they need to feel heard or they need you to understand how difficult their day has been or they need you to know and really recognize their contribution to the team even though you've decided to take the work project in another direction. 126 00:11:05,359 --> 00:11:05,830 Now, 127 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:11,169 these kinds of wonderings and kind of exploring these questions, 128 00:11:11,179 --> 00:11:17,400 this could be something that we do in a counseling or therapy session really in depth, 129 00:11:17,409 --> 00:11:17,979 right? 130 00:11:18,250 --> 00:11:24,849 So if you are trying to um process your relationship with your partner, 131 00:11:24,979 --> 00:11:29,270 maybe you process interactions with a therapist. 132 00:11:29,719 --> 00:11:38,489 But there are also probably a few things to say during these interactions that might help um you focus on the other, 133 00:11:38,669 --> 00:11:40,450 the other person's needs. 134 00:11:41,150 --> 00:11:43,260 So you could say things like, 135 00:11:43,510 --> 00:11:51,989 tell me more about how you're doing and what I can do to help? if somebody has come up to you and they're upset, 136 00:11:52,010 --> 00:11:53,450 they're emotional, 137 00:11:53,700 --> 00:11:56,630 they're in really a confrontational moment. 138 00:11:57,479 --> 00:12:05,929 -- Letting them know that you'd like to know how they're doing and what you can do to help ... can be a connecting moment. 139 00:12:07,650 --> 00:12:14,340 What do you want me to know that you feel like I don't understand about what your experience is. 140 00:12:15,489 --> 00:12:18,020 What are your needs in this situation? 141 00:12:18,030 --> 00:12:25,270 Tell me what you need... or I really value you and I do want to be part of the solution, 142 00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:26,530 not the problem. 143 00:12:28,989 --> 00:12:32,109 Do you need to say these specific words? 144 00:12:32,169 --> 00:12:32,840 No, 145 00:12:33,109 --> 00:12:40,169 it's important to make them your own and to match them to the person that you're talking to in the context. 146 00:12:40,179 --> 00:12:54,169 But the sentiment is there that you want good things to come out of this conversation that you want to know where they're coming from and what you can do um to advance things, 147 00:12:54,179 --> 00:12:54,849 support them, 148 00:12:54,859 --> 00:12:56,070 make things better. 149 00:12:58,150 --> 00:13:05,010 The basic idea is to pause and to ask for input about what they need in this situation. 150 00:13:05,380 --> 00:13:09,359 And it doesn't mean you have to change your opinion or your decisions. 151 00:13:09,369 --> 00:13:16,159 But in the midst of factual things like projects and chores making plans, 152 00:13:16,169 --> 00:13:23,619 there's still value that is found in recognizing the needs of the other during these interactions. 153 00:13:24,030 --> 00:13:31,809 And that can help bridge the gap from conversation that is factual to conversation, 154 00:13:31,820 --> 00:13:33,460 that is effective. 155 00:13:33,909 --> 00:13:36,419 The second thing I'd like you to keep in mind. 156 00:13:36,429 --> 00:13:45,219 And this is also a way of focusing on connecting with the other is the use of compliments and gratitude. 157 00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:55,640 This is another way that we can attend to the person and set the stage for the communication and the relationship. 158 00:13:56,309 --> 00:14:00,119 So some would say this person's only doing their job, 159 00:14:00,130 --> 00:14:03,520 why do I have to compliment them or thank them? 160 00:14:03,830 --> 00:14:05,400 I don't need that. 161 00:14:05,460 --> 00:14:06,460 I don't want that. 162 00:14:06,469 --> 00:14:07,859 I don't even like that. 163 00:14:09,039 --> 00:14:17,140 But this is a relatively easy thing that helps attend to what the other person needs even if you don't need it. 164 00:14:17,489 --> 00:14:22,489 So it sets the stage for people to understand how you view them. 165 00:14:23,099 --> 00:14:26,729 And when difficult things do happen in the relationship, 166 00:14:26,750 --> 00:14:33,030 the way that we interpret those may have to do with how this stage has been set in the past. 167 00:14:33,179 --> 00:14:34,150 For example, 168 00:14:34,159 --> 00:14:40,770 if is this a person who really knows for multiple examples in the past that you value them. 169 00:14:41,070 --> 00:14:45,000 And therefore this glitch in communication or this disagreement, 170 00:14:45,289 --> 00:14:46,669 it's tough, 171 00:14:47,150 --> 00:14:50,669 maybe it's unpleasant but it's not monumental. 172 00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:56,039 Or is this someone who really doesn't know that you value them? 173 00:14:56,049 --> 00:15:00,760 And therefore every communication glitch is really a big deal. 174 00:15:01,109 --> 00:15:04,580 So compliments and gratitude set the stage. 175 00:15:04,590 --> 00:15:07,260 This is how I think about you. 176 00:15:07,270 --> 00:15:09,419 This is how I think about our team. 177 00:15:09,479 --> 00:15:10,080 Again, 178 00:15:10,090 --> 00:15:11,140 I see you, 179 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:16,099 I value you and it doesn't have to be mushy and emotional. 180 00:15:16,109 --> 00:15:18,840 It should fit the context and the person. 181 00:15:19,070 --> 00:15:19,789 But again, 182 00:15:19,799 --> 00:15:28,119 just a very uh brief uh effective way of adding to that connection during communication. 183 00:15:29,119 --> 00:15:32,179 Let's talk about two levels of compliment. 184 00:15:32,419 --> 00:15:40,890 One is a compliment about a skill or achievement and one is a compliment about a personal attribute. 185 00:15:41,530 --> 00:15:44,820 So the second one is really a higher level. 186 00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:52,830 Um and it gives a stronger message that I see you and I value you, 187 00:15:52,900 --> 00:15:56,789 not only do I see your product and I appreciate the product, 188 00:15:56,799 --> 00:16:00,590 but I see the person that produced that and, 189 00:16:00,599 --> 00:16:03,210 and I value your contribution. 190 00:16:04,179 --> 00:16:04,440 Now, 191 00:16:04,450 --> 00:16:11,880 they're both powerful and you can choose the type that you use based on how well you know the person, 192 00:16:11,890 --> 00:16:17,549 what your goal is in that social interaction and what else is happening in the context. 193 00:16:18,559 --> 00:16:19,530 For example, 194 00:16:19,539 --> 00:16:26,830 a partner who's trying to improve his relationship with his spouse could either say this is a delicious dinner. 195 00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:33,270 It's great to come home after all these pressured meetings to a really pleasant meal. 196 00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:35,549 And I thank you so much for fixing it. 197 00:16:36,700 --> 00:16:47,549 That would be a really nice way to set the relationship stage that you see the work that went into this and you've enjoyed the meal and you're grateful. 198 00:16:48,489 --> 00:16:48,900 Now, 199 00:16:48,909 --> 00:16:53,099 if it's a partner use this next level of compliment, 200 00:16:53,559 --> 00:17:04,060 he may have said you are such a great cook and you seem to know just what would help me unwind from a long and pressured day at work. 201 00:17:04,069 --> 00:17:06,140 I so appreciate that about you. 202 00:17:07,819 --> 00:17:14,420 Compliments and thank yous this gratitude and acknowledgement of the other, 203 00:17:14,739 --> 00:17:17,199 what they've brought the skill sets, 204 00:17:17,209 --> 00:17:19,609 they have individual attributes. 205 00:17:19,930 --> 00:17:27,670 This can all help set the stage for a relationship that the other person feels safe and happy with. 206 00:17:32,109 --> 00:17:36,300 The third way of adding to this communication, 207 00:17:36,310 --> 00:17:49,010 that's not only factual but also effective is to think about to identify and discuss topics and life events that are important to the other person, 208 00:17:49,290 --> 00:17:51,800 even when they are not important to you, 209 00:17:51,810 --> 00:17:54,119 you really honestly don't care about them. 210 00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:56,170 But again, 211 00:17:56,180 --> 00:17:59,310 we're looking for communication that's effective. 212 00:17:59,349 --> 00:18:11,849 And you're choosing those moments when you are really working toward your longer term goals that I do want to have a better work team relationship. 213 00:18:11,859 --> 00:18:16,250 I do want to be able to be an effective teacher. 214 00:18:16,569 --> 00:18:29,770 So listen for things that are important to the other person and this might be things about their family it's good to know with people that you see or work with on a regular basis. 215 00:18:29,780 --> 00:18:31,449 What's their partner's name? 216 00:18:31,459 --> 00:18:32,829 What are their kids' names? 217 00:18:32,839 --> 00:18:35,770 What family are they interacting with? 218 00:18:35,780 --> 00:18:37,280 Who do they live with? 219 00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:41,880 Maybe they're talking about taking their son to his soccer tournament this weekend. 220 00:18:43,329 --> 00:18:47,650 This may be topics that they're passionate about but you are not. 221 00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:55,550 Maybe they love sci-fi movies or quilting might even be milestones in their life. 222 00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:59,459 It could be that they've had a birthday recently or a marriage anniversary. 223 00:18:59,910 --> 00:19:04,699 Maybe they've moved into a new apartment or purchased their first home. 224 00:19:05,670 --> 00:19:08,849 Even though these things are not important to you, 225 00:19:09,140 --> 00:19:18,819 they are important to the other and connecting in a more effective way with this person is part of your intentional life choice. 226 00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:27,630 You may consider making an effort to interact with this person once a week or once a month just to ask about things that are important to them. 227 00:19:28,849 --> 00:19:34,180 You don't have to know about the topic in order to bring it up in conversation. 228 00:19:34,329 --> 00:19:35,579 So people will say, 229 00:19:35,589 --> 00:19:36,119 well, 230 00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:39,599 not only do I not know about sci-fi movies, 231 00:19:39,609 --> 00:19:44,859 but I'm really not at all interested and I don't know what I would say. 232 00:19:45,969 --> 00:19:47,300 Um That's ok, 233 00:19:47,829 --> 00:19:49,219 this is about them. 234 00:19:49,229 --> 00:19:54,540 The goal is not to add content and correct factual information. 235 00:19:54,550 --> 00:20:03,560 The goal is to connect effectively and to set the stage of connection and you can do that without any factual knowledge. 236 00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:08,869 So you could say I don't know much about that topic. 237 00:20:09,329 --> 00:20:09,349 Uh, 238 00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:11,550 what do you like most about it? 239 00:20:11,729 --> 00:20:13,750 What first got you interested in, 240 00:20:14,270 --> 00:20:15,489 in that area? 241 00:20:16,180 --> 00:20:18,310 What's coming up related to that topic? 242 00:20:18,319 --> 00:20:18,410 So, 243 00:20:18,420 --> 00:20:22,829 let's say this is the sci-fi lover and you might say, 244 00:20:22,839 --> 00:20:23,369 hey, 245 00:20:23,510 --> 00:20:26,630 any big movies coming up that you're gonna go see. 246 00:20:27,290 --> 00:20:28,660 I'm not, 247 00:20:28,670 --> 00:20:28,920 um, 248 00:20:28,930 --> 00:20:30,920 up on what's at the movie theater. 249 00:20:31,260 --> 00:20:31,579 Um, 250 00:20:31,589 --> 00:20:42,010 so then this invites them to talk about their favorite topic And then later you could ask them how the movie was or someone who has, 251 00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:42,319 um, 252 00:20:42,329 --> 00:20:52,209 a real love for fish tanks and fish and little um villages in the fish tank that they build. 253 00:20:52,219 --> 00:20:53,170 Um You could say, 254 00:20:53,180 --> 00:20:53,420 hey, 255 00:20:53,430 --> 00:20:55,920 any new fish in your fish tank lately, 256 00:20:55,930 --> 00:20:57,229 what if you got that's new? 257 00:20:57,239 --> 00:20:58,510 Do you have a picture? 258 00:20:59,290 --> 00:21:04,520 So the purpose is not to contribute to a topic. 259 00:21:04,530 --> 00:21:06,969 The purpose is not to be correct. 260 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:09,329 The purpose is to say, 261 00:21:09,339 --> 00:21:09,739 hey, 262 00:21:09,750 --> 00:21:10,500 I see you. 263 00:21:10,510 --> 00:21:11,500 I hear you. 264 00:21:11,839 --> 00:21:16,969 Um And I'm really acknowledging what's important to you. 265 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:18,319 You could say, 266 00:21:18,329 --> 00:21:18,540 hey, 267 00:21:18,550 --> 00:21:21,260 how did the move to your new apartment go this weekend? 268 00:21:21,270 --> 00:21:22,959 Did you get hit with the rain? 269 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:28,770 You can acknowledge what a big job it is to move and say, 270 00:21:28,780 --> 00:21:29,140 hey, 271 00:21:29,150 --> 00:21:31,209 I hope you feel settled in soon. 272 00:21:31,859 --> 00:21:33,250 You could say, 273 00:21:33,260 --> 00:21:35,650 how did your son's soccer tournament go? 274 00:21:35,969 --> 00:21:37,550 Did he feel good about it? 275 00:21:38,199 --> 00:21:41,689 Did you get to visit any interesting places or? 276 00:21:41,699 --> 00:21:44,109 I'm so glad you guys have that opportunity. 277 00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:45,790 What a big commitment that is, 278 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:56,670 but I'm sure you'll have lots of great memories and perhaps you set a goal where you're going to ask someone on your work team, 279 00:21:56,680 --> 00:22:04,550 a follow up question once a week or three times a week and you're gonna rotate people. 280 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:16,810 This is a way to make the goal real and to keep that intentionality in mind while working toward the goals that you do have. 281 00:22:17,229 --> 00:22:17,579 Now, 282 00:22:17,589 --> 00:22:22,260 there is so much we could cover about communicating and connecting. 283 00:22:22,599 --> 00:22:29,119 But hopefully this episode gives you some concrete things to use today in your relationships. 284 00:22:29,380 --> 00:22:36,319 We've reviewed the importance of pausing during an interaction to think about or ask the person what they need. 285 00:22:36,790 --> 00:22:45,790 We reviewed types of compliments and ways of expressing gratitude and how these can set the stage for helping with future interactions. 286 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:57,229 And we reviewed that acknowledging what topics and life events are important to the other person can also really increase the value and fruitfulness of an interaction. 287 00:22:58,829 --> 00:23:03,979 If you want to dive deeper into communication and connection topics, 288 00:23:04,199 --> 00:23:06,560 there are great resources out there. 289 00:23:07,050 --> 00:23:07,420 Now, 290 00:23:07,430 --> 00:23:11,130 I don't have any financial interest in any of these products. 291 00:23:11,170 --> 00:23:16,859 I'm just offering some ideas of things that have helped or helped my clients in the past. 292 00:23:17,619 --> 00:23:25,219 I've linked some of my favorites in the show notes and one is a great book called The Science of Making Friends, 293 00:23:25,250 --> 00:23:30,760 which highlights strategies from the peers program that's out of U C L A. 294 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:34,910 And there are chapters on finding and choosing good friends, 295 00:23:35,339 --> 00:23:37,579 elements of good conversations, 296 00:23:37,949 --> 00:23:39,680 dealing with arguments, 297 00:23:39,689 --> 00:23:41,290 handling and addressing, 298 00:23:41,300 --> 00:23:43,569 teasing and cyberbullying, 299 00:23:43,890 --> 00:23:48,239 minimizing rumors and gossip and changing a bad reputation. 300 00:23:48,589 --> 00:23:48,959 Now, 301 00:23:48,969 --> 00:23:53,699 this is a book that's focused on an audience of teens and young adults. 302 00:23:54,239 --> 00:24:00,270 I like to take those kind of books and apply the basic concepts to whatever age group I'm working with. 303 00:24:00,489 --> 00:24:03,550 But if you really don't relate to books in that way, 304 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:09,130 and it's going to be distracting if people in the examples are from a different generation, 305 00:24:09,199 --> 00:24:10,989 that book may not be for you. 306 00:24:11,479 --> 00:24:16,920 There are also well known books such as Better Small Talk by Patrick King, 307 00:24:17,319 --> 00:24:25,550 How To Win Friends and Influence people by Dale Carnegie and Crucial Conversations by multiple people, 308 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:27,959 Joseph Granny Carri Patterson, 309 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,569 Ron mcmillan and Switzer. 310 00:24:31,390 --> 00:24:40,640 This book is a great tool to expand your skills at persuasion without being abrasive and to engage in conversations. 311 00:24:40,650 --> 00:24:44,439 Even when emotions are really running high, 312 00:24:44,770 --> 00:24:46,979 we're gonna need to know how to do that. 313 00:24:46,989 --> 00:24:51,859 If we're gonna be in connecting relationships that are really fruitful. 314 00:24:52,339 --> 00:24:58,449 There are many other great sources out there as well and I encourage you to find some that speak to you. 315 00:24:58,530 --> 00:24:58,839 Well, 316 00:24:58,849 --> 00:25:04,819 thanks again for joining me for this fourth episode of The Living With Intention Series. 317 00:25:04,849 --> 00:25:10,410 If you have goals that require you to expand your repertoire for communicating and connecting, 318 00:25:10,589 --> 00:25:15,030 I hope these tips and resources are a great place to start. 319 00:25:15,819 --> 00:25:22,310 Join me next time as we continue this series about intentional living on the autism spectrum.    

Want to live with more intention in order to achieve your goals? You may wish to start with steps to improve your core resilience so you can challenge yourself in other life areas. In this third episode in a series on intentional living, Dr. Regan identifies ways to improve resilience by using physical inputs to calm and center the nervous system.    As referenced in the current episode:  Dr. Regan's Zur Institute courses for clinicians Autism in the Adult regulation series- episode one The Alert Program The Alert Program: Your Best Self Online Course   Dr. Regan's Resources Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript here: 1 00:00:05,710 --> 00:00:06,119 Hi, 2 00:00:06,130 --> 00:00:06,800 everyone. 3 00:00:06,809 --> 00:00:11,319 This is Dr Regan, host of the podcast Autism in the Adult. 4 00:00:11,539 --> 00:00:13,239 I'm a neuropsychologist, 5 00:00:13,250 --> 00:00:17,729 a certified autism specialist and mom to a teen on the spectrum. 6 00:00:18,149 --> 00:00:25,360 It's my great pleasure to direct an autism diagnostic clinic in Central Illinois for adolescents, 7 00:00:25,370 --> 00:00:27,360 adults and aging adults. 8 00:00:27,790 --> 00:00:32,139 If you are a clinician wanting to increase your knowledge of autism, 9 00:00:32,150 --> 00:00:34,259 in order to better serve your clients, 10 00:00:34,490 --> 00:00:38,250 you may want to check out my courses at Zur Institute, 11 00:00:38,349 --> 00:00:40,409 Z U R Institute. 12 00:00:40,759 --> 00:00:44,880 The links will be in the show notes for this podcast episode. 13 00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,130 If you're a regular follower of the podcast, 14 00:00:48,139 --> 00:00:54,569 you will know that we are in the third episode in a series about living with intention on the spectrum. 15 00:00:55,400 --> 00:01:00,009 I would encourage you to listen to the first two episodes to get the most information. 16 00:01:00,139 --> 00:01:03,849 Although this episode can be stand alone as well. 17 00:01:04,300 --> 00:01:04,750 Today, 18 00:01:04,760 --> 00:01:10,569 we'll be talking about a goal within the area of health and wellness and specifically, 19 00:01:10,580 --> 00:01:16,230 we're going to focus on improving regulation using sensory inputs. 20 00:01:16,389 --> 00:01:16,699 Now, 21 00:01:16,709 --> 00:01:21,449 I have several other episodes about regulation and I'll link them in the show notes, 22 00:01:21,900 --> 00:01:33,330 but in short regulation refers to the ability to stay centered balanced to get that just right state to be both calm and attentive. 23 00:01:33,339 --> 00:01:34,349 At the same time, 24 00:01:35,419 --> 00:01:38,050 this regulation can look like a meltdown, 25 00:01:38,059 --> 00:01:39,209 a panic attack, 26 00:01:39,220 --> 00:01:44,309 an outburst or it could look like withdrawal from a place or activity. 27 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:45,230 For example, 28 00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:50,510 I need to quit this conversation or I need to go to my room off by myself. 29 00:01:50,519 --> 00:01:52,180 I can't attend work today. 30 00:01:52,190 --> 00:01:53,519 I can't go to school. 31 00:01:54,300 --> 00:01:56,809 It can also look like freeze, 32 00:01:57,209 --> 00:02:01,470 like shutting down feeling offline or dissociating. 33 00:02:02,309 --> 00:02:03,080 And finally, 34 00:02:03,089 --> 00:02:13,020 disregulation can look like the experience of physical symptoms that are not rooted or at least not completely caused by a physical condition, 35 00:02:13,250 --> 00:02:15,520 injury or disease process. 36 00:02:16,020 --> 00:02:21,479 Individuals on the spectrum are more likely to struggle with dysregulation in some form. 37 00:02:21,789 --> 00:02:30,639 Although what the dysregulation looks like can be different from one person to the next and can also change over the lifespan of the individual. 38 00:02:30,649 --> 00:02:52,699 So we can see how important the wellness topic of regulation is and why we're talking about regulation as a goal first because for some people on the spectrum regulation needs to improve before they can experience enough resiliency to get out of their comfort zone in other areas of life, 39 00:02:52,710 --> 00:02:58,130 like relationships or working or other areas that we've discussed in the series. 40 00:02:58,139 --> 00:02:58,860 So far, 41 00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:08,910 the tricky thing is that there are often more limitations to the success of regulation strategies on the spectrum than for the neurotypical. 42 00:03:09,089 --> 00:03:17,360 And the go to strategies are often some combination of counseling or talking through the difficulty, 43 00:03:17,369 --> 00:03:20,089 maybe reasoning through problems, 44 00:03:20,339 --> 00:03:27,479 we might add medication for the support of regulation or use punishment and reward programs. 45 00:03:28,350 --> 00:03:38,270 It's not that there's anything wrong with these approaches and they can be helpful as part of a layer in an overall program to help with regulation. 46 00:03:38,279 --> 00:03:39,470 However, 47 00:03:39,750 --> 00:03:42,919 if these are the only approaches we're relying on, 48 00:03:42,970 --> 00:03:46,100 there are likely to be some pretty big limitations. 49 00:03:47,050 --> 00:03:49,550 So let's think about how the nervous system works. 50 00:03:49,559 --> 00:03:52,699 If an infant is screaming, 51 00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:54,500 relentlessly crying, 52 00:03:54,509 --> 00:03:55,500 very upset, 53 00:03:55,509 --> 00:03:57,029 can't calm down. 54 00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,039 In other words, 55 00:03:58,050 --> 00:03:59,660 they can't regulate. 56 00:04:00,460 --> 00:04:05,610 We don't try to reason with them about how they're completely safe. 57 00:04:05,619 --> 00:04:07,509 They've just been fed, 58 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:12,589 they're not in any danger or that their crying is really too loud. 59 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:13,869 It's bedtime. 60 00:04:14,690 --> 00:04:17,260 We don't go reasoning through all that. 61 00:04:17,998 --> 00:04:23,368 We don't give them medication for depression or for anxiety. 62 00:04:23,959 --> 00:04:28,348 We don't use rewards or punishments in the traditional sense. 63 00:04:28,799 --> 00:04:29,239 Again, 64 00:04:29,248 --> 00:04:31,928 it's not that I don't recommend these approaches. 65 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:34,588 I think they can be very helpful at times. 66 00:04:34,598 --> 00:04:40,098 But I'm pointing out that there is another way for humans to regulate their nervous system. 67 00:04:40,378 --> 00:04:43,428 And if you picture what we do for the infant, 68 00:04:44,070 --> 00:04:46,149 we hold them. 69 00:04:46,359 --> 00:05:02,649 Sometimes we swaddle the infant in a blanket and the holding or swaddling gives them pressure inputs that gives them this snug hug and then what do we do? 70 00:05:02,660 --> 00:05:02,920 Well, 71 00:05:02,929 --> 00:05:09,059 typically we rack them and this gives their brain some movement to input. 72 00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:13,260 This isn't always a magic way of calming an infant. 73 00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:18,619 But it often helps quite a bit as an approach to help the infant regulate, 74 00:05:18,630 --> 00:05:19,820 to center, 75 00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:21,470 to feel calm. 76 00:05:21,630 --> 00:05:26,179 Because the infant relies on the adult for regulation. 77 00:05:26,730 --> 00:05:29,140 This approach of using pressure, 78 00:05:29,420 --> 00:05:34,540 which we call proprioceptive inputs and movement. 79 00:05:34,579 --> 00:05:35,579 In this case, 80 00:05:35,589 --> 00:05:38,799 I'm talking about vestibular inputs. 81 00:05:39,170 --> 00:05:48,589 This approach of getting these inputs into the nervous system helps people of all ages and with all variations of nervous connections, 82 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:49,859 nervous systems, 83 00:05:50,410 --> 00:05:53,359 uh whether you are neurotypical, 84 00:05:53,369 --> 00:05:55,850 whether you are neuro diverse, 85 00:05:55,859 --> 00:05:57,380 it doesn't matter we do. 86 00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:59,890 This is how our nervous system works. 87 00:06:00,049 --> 00:06:08,470 That's why therapists working with little kids on regulation may have them do heavy work like carrying or pushing something heavy. 88 00:06:08,690 --> 00:06:10,679 That's for the pressure input. 89 00:06:11,630 --> 00:06:15,489 It's why some individuals like weighted blankets for calming, 90 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:17,679 that's pressure as well. 91 00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:22,820 Other individuals like to ride their bike after work or go jogging. 92 00:06:22,970 --> 00:06:23,279 Well, 93 00:06:23,290 --> 00:06:25,179 that's movement input. 94 00:06:25,290 --> 00:06:34,579 So we all tap into some of these inputs without really realizing why we like them or what role they have in helping us feel centered. 95 00:06:34,790 --> 00:06:35,309 Today, 96 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:47,570 we'll focus on increasing your awareness of what your nervous system may need as far as physical inputs to help with regulation as well as how and when to use them. 97 00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:58,929 One place to start can be to think about what you have historically been drawn to perhaps as a child or in school or most recently, 98 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:03,250 you can get pressure in the muscles or the joints, 99 00:07:03,260 --> 00:07:11,390 proprioceptive inputs into the brain pressure in the muscles could be from a massage or laying in a hammock. 100 00:07:11,399 --> 00:07:13,579 You get that squeeze input, 101 00:07:14,049 --> 00:07:16,429 laying under a weighted blanket, 102 00:07:16,779 --> 00:07:20,070 draping over an exercise ball, 103 00:07:20,679 --> 00:07:22,609 curling up in a chair. 104 00:07:22,619 --> 00:07:25,950 When we say I just want to curl up and read a good book. 105 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:28,140 That's when we're giving ourselves, 106 00:07:28,149 --> 00:07:43,269 that kind of squeeze input being in the fetal position helps us have that squeeze hugs or bear hugs can give us that input laying on the ground or flapping on the ground. 107 00:07:43,869 --> 00:07:48,160 Pressure into the joints could be from things like pushing, 108 00:07:48,190 --> 00:07:49,000 pulling, 109 00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:49,950 hanging, 110 00:07:50,329 --> 00:07:54,200 anything that offers resistance through the joints, 111 00:07:54,829 --> 00:07:56,970 hanging from a pull up bar, 112 00:07:56,980 --> 00:07:58,559 shoveling snow, 113 00:07:58,709 --> 00:07:59,750 swimming, 114 00:08:00,019 --> 00:08:03,670 stretching a Farrah band or resistance band, 115 00:08:04,079 --> 00:08:08,959 riding a bike pressure through the jaw by chewing, 116 00:08:08,970 --> 00:08:14,140 resistive foods can also be pressure input for the nervous system. 117 00:08:14,459 --> 00:08:29,549 Maybe somebody loves to attack some beef jerky or crunchy food or chew gum pressure through the hands or feet by using a stress ball or rolling your foot over a tennis ball. 118 00:08:30,959 --> 00:08:34,729 You'll get the most input for the nervous system. 119 00:08:34,770 --> 00:08:37,530 When you're doing whole body activities, 120 00:08:37,539 --> 00:08:40,890 then when you're using the jaw or hands and feet, 121 00:08:41,119 --> 00:08:44,390 but we can't always do whole body activities. 122 00:08:44,789 --> 00:08:56,200 Maybe we're in a classroom and all we can do is have some gum that we're gonna chew on and maybe squeeze a stress ball under the desk movement. 123 00:08:56,210 --> 00:09:02,099 Input like the rocking baby gives vestibular input into the brain, 124 00:09:02,789 --> 00:09:08,140 the brain does not get vestibular input when we move our arms and legs, 125 00:09:08,150 --> 00:09:10,619 but we stand or sit still. 126 00:09:11,049 --> 00:09:13,049 There's no vestibular input. 127 00:09:13,059 --> 00:09:14,479 When we're on a treadmill, 128 00:09:14,489 --> 00:09:15,590 for example, 129 00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:18,700 or we're using a stationary bike, 130 00:09:19,299 --> 00:09:22,369 the fluid in our ears has to be moving. 131 00:09:22,559 --> 00:09:24,739 So when we're moving through space, 132 00:09:24,750 --> 00:09:26,719 like running through the neighborhood, 133 00:09:26,729 --> 00:09:29,450 swinging or riding a bike outside, 134 00:09:29,530 --> 00:09:32,059 then we're getting vestibular input. 135 00:09:32,849 --> 00:09:34,700 So those who say, 136 00:09:34,710 --> 00:09:34,900 oh, 137 00:09:34,909 --> 00:09:36,539 I love riding my bike, 138 00:09:36,549 --> 00:09:39,349 but I will not ride a stationary bike. 139 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:44,690 What they may be saying is that their nervous system really needs that movement, 140 00:09:44,700 --> 00:09:47,890 that vestibular input through space. 141 00:09:48,950 --> 00:09:53,469 There are three types of vestibular input linear. 142 00:09:54,030 --> 00:09:57,369 So going in a relatively straight line, 143 00:09:57,380 --> 00:10:00,690 like if you're jumping up and down on a trampoline, 144 00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:06,750 swinging front and back or rocking left and right or front to back, 145 00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:10,919 rotary is spinning or twirling. 146 00:10:10,929 --> 00:10:14,020 That's the second kind of vestibular input. 147 00:10:14,710 --> 00:10:19,919 And the third kind are inversions which involves being upside down, 148 00:10:19,929 --> 00:10:21,840 like hanging upside down, 149 00:10:21,849 --> 00:10:26,429 doing a forward bend or doing a down dog position. 150 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:27,080 In yoga. 151 00:10:27,900 --> 00:10:31,719 The movement inputs can be alerting or calming, 152 00:10:31,859 --> 00:10:35,929 intense or gentle as an individual. 153 00:10:35,940 --> 00:10:40,390 You can see what helps your nervous system at any given time. 154 00:10:40,799 --> 00:10:45,210 Someone who wants to feel calm or may want to rock in a rocking chair, 155 00:10:45,940 --> 00:10:57,330 sometimes people like to ride in the car and that just helps them feel centered and calm babies or little kids might fall asleep in the car. 156 00:10:57,340 --> 00:11:01,530 Even when they were so upset when they were actually getting in the car, 157 00:11:01,809 --> 00:11:07,580 another person may really feel calmer when they've been swinging again. 158 00:11:07,590 --> 00:11:15,320 We have the swings for infants that they can rock in and get that gentle front and back motion. 159 00:11:17,619 --> 00:11:24,390 Someone who wants to feel more alert and activated like I need energy, 160 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,809 I need momentum to get going. 161 00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:31,609 They may want to ride their bike down a hill or jump on a trampoline. 162 00:11:31,940 --> 00:11:35,349 That vigorous movement input is often more alerting. 163 00:11:35,909 --> 00:11:37,250 So someone might say, 164 00:11:37,260 --> 00:11:37,630 oh, 165 00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:38,820 now, 166 00:11:38,900 --> 00:11:40,669 now I'm really awake. 167 00:11:41,099 --> 00:11:46,719 Every nervous system though responds a bit uniquely to these different kinds of inputs. 168 00:11:46,809 --> 00:11:57,619 So it's really important to know your own system to try different things safely and to gradually develop your own insight about what you need. 169 00:11:57,630 --> 00:12:03,809 And when there are some activities that provide both pressure and movement input, 170 00:12:04,169 --> 00:12:09,510 riding a bike gives pressure through the joints as well as movement through space. 171 00:12:10,119 --> 00:12:10,890 Climbing, 172 00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:18,349 a rock wall provides really intense pressure in the joints as well as gentle movement up the wall, 173 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:22,619 swimming provides resistance through the joints. 174 00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:32,409 Some mild pressure on the muscles from the water pressure and some movement which could be mild or more intense depending on the speed of movement. 175 00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:35,530 Whether the person is going upside down. 176 00:12:35,570 --> 00:12:39,450 Are they diving off of a height or going down a water slide? 177 00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:43,289 If you think back to what you have really loved to do, 178 00:12:43,869 --> 00:12:47,750 you may get clues about what your nervous system prefers. 179 00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:54,820 One person may have a history of a love for diving and they've been on the swim team during school, 180 00:12:55,140 --> 00:12:59,880 but maybe they don't have any source of inputs since they graduated. 181 00:13:00,510 --> 00:13:05,349 They haven't even realized how important these inputs were to their regulation. 182 00:13:06,130 --> 00:13:09,520 Another person may have a love of roller coasters, 183 00:13:09,530 --> 00:13:10,880 fast motorcycles, 184 00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:11,989 skydiving, 185 00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:15,780 their system loves intense vestibular inputs. 186 00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,479 Another may love weightlifting, 187 00:13:18,489 --> 00:13:20,289 cracking their knuckles. 188 00:13:20,489 --> 00:13:25,159 This is another source of joint pressure and heavy work, 189 00:13:25,169 --> 00:13:26,219 like yard work, 190 00:13:26,229 --> 00:13:26,799 gardening, 191 00:13:26,809 --> 00:13:30,750 household projects involving a lot of lifting of supplies. 192 00:13:31,570 --> 00:13:34,270 If you can pinpoint what your system has liked, 193 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,260 historically, 194 00:13:35,359 --> 00:13:40,359 you may have a place to start in experimenting with what your system needs. 195 00:13:40,369 --> 00:13:44,599 Now also take into account your current health, 196 00:13:44,609 --> 00:13:49,640 your physical abilities or restrictions and your doctor's advice. 197 00:13:49,690 --> 00:13:53,020 If you can't pinpoint what you've liked in the past, 198 00:13:53,030 --> 00:13:57,380 start making a list of things to try a little bit at a time. 199 00:13:58,010 --> 00:14:00,520 Perhaps some waits on one day, 200 00:14:00,530 --> 00:14:03,979 a walk through nature the next or swinging at the park. 201 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:09,630 Once you identify an area of inputs that your system benefits from. 202 00:14:09,859 --> 00:14:10,429 And again, 203 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:12,690 the benefit is feeling more centered, 204 00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:16,710 calm and fully present than before the activity, 205 00:14:16,849 --> 00:14:18,380 then start thinking, 206 00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:21,510 how else could I get inputs like this? 207 00:14:22,090 --> 00:14:23,549 If you love bike riding, 208 00:14:23,559 --> 00:14:27,130 perhaps try swinging for movement and pressure. 209 00:14:27,489 --> 00:14:32,530 If you love a way to blanket over you while rocking in a rocking chair, 210 00:14:32,630 --> 00:14:44,960 you may want to investigate a whole body swing that can be hung from the ceiling and just envelops you like a cocoon in the fabric while you move gently or vigorously. 211 00:14:45,330 --> 00:14:47,799 It can even spin in rotation. 212 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:50,289 If you like weights, 213 00:14:50,299 --> 00:14:53,820 you might wanna try rock climbing for intense joint pressure. 214 00:14:54,159 --> 00:15:03,729 Some people who like vestibular input like to join aerial fitness gyms that allow them to hang upside down in a safe and controlled environment. 215 00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:11,190 Be creative and develop some awareness of what your system responds positively toward and again, 216 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:12,010 make sure you know, 217 00:15:12,020 --> 00:15:13,140 your own body, 218 00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:17,669 your limitations and any recommendations from your own physician. 219 00:15:18,309 --> 00:15:19,960 So let's regroup. 220 00:15:19,969 --> 00:15:20,719 So far, 221 00:15:20,729 --> 00:15:23,570 you've learned about pressure and movement inputs, 222 00:15:24,140 --> 00:15:30,710 the variations of intensity and exercise versus restorative based inputs. 223 00:15:30,979 --> 00:15:34,809 So exercise could be something like riding a bike, 224 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:35,919 restorative, 225 00:15:35,929 --> 00:15:40,580 could be something like laying in a hammock swing or a hammock. 226 00:15:42,780 --> 00:15:46,979 You've considered what you have liked or not liked historically. 227 00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:52,630 And perhaps you have a list of things to try in order to build up a repertoire of options. 228 00:15:53,479 --> 00:16:03,950 The next key to growing in the area of regulation is this don't wait to do the activities until you feel like you need it. 229 00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:05,950 This is crucial. 230 00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:06,770 Now, 231 00:16:06,780 --> 00:16:14,489 this doesn't mean that you shouldn't listen to your body if you're ill or injured and not able to do a specific activity that day. 232 00:16:14,909 --> 00:16:18,929 But what often happens for the autistic is that they feel great, 233 00:16:18,940 --> 00:16:19,500 great, 234 00:16:19,510 --> 00:16:20,330 great. 235 00:16:20,609 --> 00:16:23,299 And then they feel really off center. 236 00:16:23,309 --> 00:16:26,880 And a lot of times they'll say I just did not see that coming. 237 00:16:27,359 --> 00:16:32,650 So by the time they use their as needed inputs, 238 00:16:32,919 --> 00:16:35,169 they're already deregulated. 239 00:16:35,489 --> 00:16:37,250 So that's not the goal, 240 00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:53,179 the goal is to do the activities and give regular nervous system inputs that are regulating so that the episodes of disregulation decrease in number and they're easier to recover from. 241 00:16:53,919 --> 00:17:01,450 So think about ways to give yourself centering inputs multiple times a day and that will be individual to you. 242 00:17:02,090 --> 00:17:04,979 Some people might do this three times a day, 243 00:17:04,989 --> 00:17:06,239 maybe at the beginning, 244 00:17:06,250 --> 00:17:07,300 middle and end, 245 00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:16,099 they may need some pressure and movement in the morning to wake up to become energized and to also feel calm and attentive, 246 00:17:16,780 --> 00:17:20,349 they may need inputs over the lunch hour or midday. 247 00:17:20,359 --> 00:17:21,689 And then again at night, 248 00:17:22,069 --> 00:17:26,869 perhaps restorative inputs like a rocking chair or a weighted blanket, 249 00:17:27,050 --> 00:17:28,910 maybe some nighttime yoga. 250 00:17:30,459 --> 00:17:34,349 Then when you do become deregulated on any given day, 251 00:17:34,359 --> 00:17:39,810 think ahead of time about what your as needed inputs might be. 252 00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:43,000 So when you're in the moment of disregulation, 253 00:17:43,010 --> 00:17:46,089 it's really difficult to figure out what you need. 254 00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:50,150 So you may be able to think to yourself ahead of time. 255 00:17:50,489 --> 00:17:50,829 You know, 256 00:17:50,839 --> 00:17:52,619 when I get dis regulated, 257 00:17:52,630 --> 00:17:55,239 this is what that looks and feels like. 258 00:17:55,459 --> 00:17:59,160 And when I start to see myself in that place, 259 00:17:59,170 --> 00:18:08,060 I can try these handful of things to see if it helps in that moment of crisis or kind of surprise. 260 00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:08,260 Uh, 261 00:18:08,270 --> 00:18:09,579 off centering, 262 00:18:10,239 --> 00:18:11,290 you may say, 263 00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:11,729 ok, 264 00:18:11,739 --> 00:18:14,099 I've had a particularly intense day. 265 00:18:14,109 --> 00:18:16,609 I'm feeling more off center than usual. 266 00:18:16,699 --> 00:18:26,630 I'm going to walk around my work building three times or I'm going to do forward bends and shake my head back and forth or listen to music with my headphones. 267 00:18:26,910 --> 00:18:30,449 This can be what as needed inputs look like. 268 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:34,569 So you can see that like with the music and headphones, 269 00:18:34,579 --> 00:18:41,739 sometimes the regulating inputs could be also um a sensory input from another domain. 270 00:18:41,770 --> 00:18:43,790 What do you like to listen to? 271 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,810 What scent do you like to smell like? 272 00:18:46,819 --> 00:18:48,550 Lavender or vanilla? 273 00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:54,790 But usually the big regulating inputs will involve movement and pressure. 274 00:18:56,229 --> 00:18:57,680 So today, 275 00:18:57,689 --> 00:19:02,069 we have chosen a growth area within health and wellness. 276 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:16,849 This may be a good place for you to start as you live life with intention because feeling more grounded can help you feel more resilient as you try to stretch your comfort zone in other areas. 277 00:19:17,270 --> 00:19:18,060 Remember, 278 00:19:18,069 --> 00:19:23,439 the general approach we discussed in episode two when developing this program. 279 00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:28,569 So try to set up small reachable steps forward, 280 00:19:28,859 --> 00:19:31,849 use strategy to find your momentum. 281 00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:37,130 And once you've integrated the physical inputs into your daily routine, 282 00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:41,599 that momentum will kick in and it'll help you. 283 00:19:41,609 --> 00:19:45,550 Um not feel that this whole thing is effortful. 284 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,010 It'll be just what you do on a regular basis. 285 00:19:49,599 --> 00:19:54,290 You'll also reap the benefits of having a more regulated nervous system. 286 00:19:55,109 --> 00:19:57,050 Be sure to check out the show notes, 287 00:19:57,060 --> 00:20:01,969 I have various links that we've mentioned here in the episode. 288 00:20:02,020 --> 00:20:06,089 One is a link to the Z Institute courses, 289 00:20:06,099 --> 00:20:11,619 Z U R for clinicians to learn more about autism in adolescents, 290 00:20:11,630 --> 00:20:13,489 adults and aging adults. 291 00:20:14,020 --> 00:20:21,680 I also have links to my podcast episodes about regulation if you'd like to do a deeper dive. 292 00:20:22,030 --> 00:20:39,989 And I'm also including links to the alert program put together by occupational therapists who have expertise in teaching people about using sensory inputs like movement or pressure to help regulate the nervous system, 293 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,310 to feel calmer and more attentive. 294 00:20:43,599 --> 00:20:51,569 There's also a link specifically for their for All Program alert program four. 295 00:20:51,579 --> 00:20:52,880 That's the number four, 296 00:20:52,890 --> 00:20:57,469 not the word all dot com alert program for all dot com. 297 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,890 That is a self guided study. 298 00:20:59,900 --> 00:21:05,400 You can purchase for a deeper dive into your own nervous system, 299 00:21:05,410 --> 00:21:08,469 figuring out what kind of inputs help you regulate. 300 00:21:08,890 --> 00:21:13,630 And I will have all four of those links in the show notes. 301 00:21:15,270 --> 00:21:17,359 Thank you for joining me today. 302 00:21:17,489 --> 00:21:34,439 I hope you will be able to enjoy the benefits of a more regulated nervous system and be sure to listen to our next episode as we continue this series on living with intention making goals and leaving our comfort zone.  

You may feel dissatisfaction or discomfort in some realm of life that you want to shift. But where to start and how to succeed? In this second episode in a series on intentional living, Dr. Regan identifies ways to create steps toward a goal, identify strategies, and monitor success.    As referenced in the current episode:  First Episode in Momentum for Behavior series   Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript below:   1 00:00:01,830 --> 00:00:02,250 Hi, 2 00:00:02,259 --> 00:00:02,960 everyone. 3 00:00:02,970 --> 00:00:04,380 This is your host, 4 00:00:04,389 --> 00:00:04,829 Dr. 5 00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:05,980 Theresa Regan, 6 00:00:06,250 --> 00:00:11,579 introducing this next episode of autism in the adult podcast. 7 00:00:11,939 --> 00:00:13,779 I'm a neuropsychologist. 8 00:00:13,789 --> 00:00:20,729 So I specialize in understanding how the health of the brain and the connections of the brain impact, 9 00:00:20,739 --> 00:00:21,370 thinking, 10 00:00:21,379 --> 00:00:22,020 skills, 11 00:00:22,030 --> 00:00:22,700 emotions, 12 00:00:22,709 --> 00:00:23,319 behavior, 13 00:00:23,329 --> 00:00:24,569 and personality. 14 00:00:24,790 --> 00:00:30,540 I've worked in hospitals for over 30 years and I'm the mother of a teen on the spectrum. 15 00:00:31,649 --> 00:00:39,250 And did you know that I have a series of three podcast episodes about momentum for activity. 16 00:00:39,619 --> 00:00:43,869 One is about exhaustion and finding balance in momentum. 17 00:00:44,189 --> 00:00:53,000 One of the episodes is about how to gain momentum for activity and the third is how to keep momentum for activity. 18 00:00:53,430 --> 00:00:59,430 You can find these three episodes as episodes number 21, 19 00:00:59,650 --> 00:01:04,489 and 23 In September and October of 2021. 20 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,410 I'll put the link in the show notes. 21 00:01:09,010 --> 00:01:09,449 Today, 22 00:01:09,459 --> 00:01:23,959 we have our second episode of a series about finding some intentionality in um areas of our life where we'd like to grow and maybe challenge ourselves. 23 00:01:23,970 --> 00:01:42,660 Sometimes life is so fast and furious and we get in survival mode or we just get used to living a certain way that we realize we're not really making choices in all the areas of where we put our attention, 24 00:01:42,989 --> 00:01:46,269 uh whether we wanna grow or shift gears. 25 00:01:46,650 --> 00:01:56,300 So the previous episode was this introduction of thinking about where are we in our life right now? 26 00:01:56,650 --> 00:02:02,059 And if you can identify areas where you would like to find more meaning, 27 00:02:02,449 --> 00:02:04,260 uh a bit more challenge. 28 00:02:04,269 --> 00:02:06,160 If you'd like to change direction, 29 00:02:06,370 --> 00:02:10,770 then we're going to focus together on living intentionally. 30 00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:23,789 The first episode covered a few things and one is that I think the first step toward being intentional is having this increased self-awareness. 31 00:02:24,149 --> 00:02:37,429 And I feel like that's one of the greatest blessings of understanding our neurology and going through the diagnostic process about autism to see what, 32 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:41,460 how am I wired and what does my system need? 33 00:02:41,779 --> 00:02:43,649 How do I interact with people? 34 00:02:43,660 --> 00:02:46,210 What do I find uh joy in, 35 00:02:46,220 --> 00:02:46,770 in life? 36 00:02:46,779 --> 00:02:54,289 What drains me and we have this elevated understanding of ourselves. 37 00:02:54,300 --> 00:02:57,289 Um That is part of that process. 38 00:02:58,300 --> 00:03:02,229 So I think after that process of self awareness, 39 00:03:02,699 --> 00:03:09,410 if we do identify areas where we would like to grow or expand in some way, 40 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:11,309 one way to do that. 41 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:17,339 And we covered this in the initial episode is to think of categories in our life. 42 00:03:17,380 --> 00:03:24,490 And I invited you to do this um to see where you might want to shift. 43 00:03:26,479 --> 00:03:32,490 One of the categories we talked about was within the area of a special interest. 44 00:03:33,270 --> 00:03:37,470 The second was within the area of health and wellness. 45 00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:40,559 The third was regulation, 46 00:03:40,889 --> 00:03:46,699 that means the ability to stay centered with things like alertness, 47 00:03:46,889 --> 00:03:49,880 attention and emotions. 48 00:03:50,809 --> 00:03:53,380 We also talked about 1/4 category, 49 00:03:53,389 --> 00:03:54,729 relationships. 50 00:03:55,169 --> 00:04:04,699 1/5 as everyday tasks kind of like staying on top of those chores and daily things that can be hard to get a rhythm for. 51 00:04:05,130 --> 00:04:10,600 And the sixth would be something like family and household culture. 52 00:04:10,880 --> 00:04:14,130 So if you're living in a household with other people, 53 00:04:14,350 --> 00:04:19,170 and these are people who are wired differently than each other. 54 00:04:19,179 --> 00:04:26,690 Sometimes focusing on the culture of the household can be a rewarding area of growth. 55 00:04:29,399 --> 00:04:30,410 Today, 56 00:04:30,420 --> 00:04:38,470 I would like you to bring your thoughts of what areas you would like to find more meaning in and to have more intention for. 57 00:04:38,730 --> 00:05:01,500 And we're going to talk about some basic um guidelines for making goals that you can stick with and that you can see change um in these areas without feeling overwhelmed and without kind of stopping in the middle and like our um New Year's resolutions. 58 00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:01,980 We don't want to, 59 00:05:02,059 --> 00:05:03,109 to be like that, 60 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:12,369 but we want you to have this intention towards something and to give you some structure of how big should the goal be and, 61 00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:16,399 and how quickly should I work toward it and all of these things, 62 00:05:16,410 --> 00:05:20,869 I just want to give you some framework to see if this framework helps you. 63 00:05:21,730 --> 00:05:26,579 The first thing I'd like you to do is to take stock of where you are now. 64 00:05:27,059 --> 00:05:30,279 So if you chose a health and wellness goal, 65 00:05:30,290 --> 00:05:33,709 if you chose a household culture goal, 66 00:05:33,799 --> 00:05:40,970 I just want you to think about where you are right now in this area. 67 00:05:41,260 --> 00:05:45,100 So don't focus on the end goal. 68 00:05:45,109 --> 00:05:47,350 Let's just focus on where you are. 69 00:05:49,690 --> 00:05:53,500 Someone may say for health and wellness. 70 00:05:53,510 --> 00:05:53,980 Well, 71 00:05:53,989 --> 00:06:00,299 where I'm at is that I probably walk 10 minutes after work twice a week. 72 00:06:00,989 --> 00:06:13,000 Another person in the area of everyday tasks may want to really stay on top of bill paying and financial management. 73 00:06:13,010 --> 00:06:14,989 And so they may say, 74 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:15,279 well, 75 00:06:15,290 --> 00:06:26,760 where I'm at right now is that I tend to um go overboard and spend more than I have in my bank account about four times a month. 76 00:06:26,989 --> 00:06:38,209 So we're just taking stock whatever your category is for growth and meaning maybe take stock of where you are now. 77 00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:47,000 And um knowing that you would like to be in a different spot at some point in the future. 78 00:06:48,059 --> 00:06:55,269 The next step is to create a goal where you're just going to take that one step forward. 79 00:06:56,130 --> 00:07:02,420 Um What we want to do is to make this goal really achievable. 80 00:07:02,429 --> 00:07:05,779 We want to set ourselves up for success. 81 00:07:05,790 --> 00:07:13,829 We want to be able to see the end of the goal and we want the goal to be on the lower side of effort. 82 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:23,880 One way to create this type of goal is to think about time spent toward your ultimate destination. 83 00:07:26,269 --> 00:07:27,730 For example, 84 00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:32,179 in the area of movement and exercise. 85 00:07:32,190 --> 00:07:44,149 Someone may realize that they're walking a certain amount after work every week and they may add time to that current routine. 86 00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:50,730 So someone who wants to have more movement in their life or to get outdoors more frequently, 87 00:07:50,869 --> 00:07:52,529 perhaps they say, 88 00:07:52,540 --> 00:07:52,869 well, 89 00:07:52,880 --> 00:08:04,049 I'm going to add 15 minutes a week to my current routine of being outside or of walking in the neighborhood and moving. 90 00:08:04,290 --> 00:08:04,570 Um, 91 00:08:04,579 --> 00:08:06,829 just getting that movement in, 92 00:08:06,839 --> 00:08:08,549 maybe that's their goal. 93 00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:16,630 Another person who wants to work toward achieving skills in a certain area, 94 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:26,850 maybe they're working toward a promotion or they would like to learn a new skill for fun within perhaps within their special interests. 95 00:08:27,929 --> 00:08:35,580 The goal may be to spend a certain amount of time per week learning this new skill. 96 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:39,690 If they're currently not learning anything about it, 97 00:08:39,700 --> 00:08:42,750 they might want to start with 20 minutes a week. 98 00:08:43,030 --> 00:08:45,190 If they're already doing 20, 99 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:48,049 they might want to increase by 15, 100 00:08:48,849 --> 00:08:54,260 whatever the stepwise time goal might be for you, 101 00:08:54,270 --> 00:08:57,780 that would make sense in your area of interest. 102 00:08:58,530 --> 00:09:02,979 That may be a way that you'd like to construct what your actual goal is. 103 00:09:04,049 --> 00:09:13,780 You can also think of it as doing a certain fraction or a certain percentage of the work toward the ultimate goal. 104 00:09:14,739 --> 00:09:20,969 If someone would like to have intentionality in the area of their special interest, 105 00:09:21,580 --> 00:09:22,479 publishing, 106 00:09:22,489 --> 00:09:32,570 some of their short stories may be a goal where they're at currently is they have a collection of 50 short stories, 107 00:09:33,049 --> 00:09:36,549 most of which are within a science fiction genre. 108 00:09:37,950 --> 00:09:45,770 They've never taken a class on creative writing or on marketing for their own business. 109 00:09:46,549 --> 00:09:58,960 What they might do is sit down with a friend and talk about all the steps that they might want to take to make this publishing goal most successful. 110 00:10:00,289 --> 00:10:02,719 They may identify 10, 111 00:10:02,729 --> 00:10:03,460 15, 112 00:10:03,469 --> 00:10:04,760 20 steps. 113 00:10:05,460 --> 00:10:10,059 One might be taking a free online course in creative writing. 114 00:10:11,330 --> 00:10:20,020 Another might be joining a local writers group in their community to become part of a network for writers. 115 00:10:22,270 --> 00:10:29,919 Another goal might be learning how to create a website or how to publish their own material online. 116 00:10:30,919 --> 00:10:35,179 They would want to take one of these multiple steps. 117 00:10:35,239 --> 00:10:37,679 So if they've identified 20, 118 00:10:38,179 --> 00:10:49,909 they may just want to take one goal then they'd have to figure out is this goal small enough that I can see the end. 119 00:10:50,270 --> 00:11:05,979 I know I can have success and it doesn't feel too effortful if they're going to sign up for a free online class in creative writing that may feel super easy or it may feel too big. 120 00:11:07,239 --> 00:11:08,880 If it's too big, 121 00:11:09,049 --> 00:11:13,400 you would want to break that task down. 122 00:11:13,739 --> 00:11:23,239 So the first step might be to investigate some free online options to choose from. 123 00:11:25,359 --> 00:11:37,309 If someone has a goal to participate in additional community activities or to get out of the house a bit more often, 124 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:57,130 they may make a goal to attend one community event per month uh with a friend Or they may make a goal to spend 15 minutes at a community event before they decide whether they want to come home. 125 00:11:57,559 --> 00:12:00,200 This just gives a bit of structure, 126 00:12:00,309 --> 00:12:12,630 but the whole process is meant to just help make one step forward and not to have a goal that's too big or too effortful. 127 00:12:12,679 --> 00:12:14,849 So we should be able to see the end. 128 00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:19,989 We should know that it takes some effort that it takes us out of our comfort zone, 129 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,359 but that we also are set up for success. 130 00:12:24,559 --> 00:12:27,710 The next step would be thinking of a timeline. 131 00:12:29,359 --> 00:12:41,849 If someone has a goal in the area of regulation and they identify that they would like to be more intentional about their sleep wake cycle. 132 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:50,000 They may determine that they'll watch how they do with their goal across two weeks. 133 00:12:50,690 --> 00:12:58,320 Perhaps their goal is to get up at the same time every day and after two weeks, 134 00:12:58,330 --> 00:13:10,919 they can evaluate how easy or difficult that goal was to achieve for someone who's wanting to stay on top of the dishes every day. 135 00:13:11,250 --> 00:13:24,380 They may also pick a week or two weeks as a time frame that they can monitor their success or stop and reevaluate if the stepwise goal feels like it's been too difficult. 136 00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:32,059 But here comes the most important step we've looked at creating that step forward goal, 137 00:13:32,710 --> 00:13:34,520 creating a time frame. 138 00:13:35,140 --> 00:13:43,190 And this third part I would say is the most important this is picking a strategy to have success. 139 00:13:44,140 --> 00:13:47,270 What does not work is just saying, 140 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:47,630 well, 141 00:13:47,640 --> 00:13:48,880 I'm going to do it. 142 00:13:49,159 --> 00:13:50,630 I've made the goal, 143 00:13:50,640 --> 00:13:54,690 I'm intentional about the goal and I have this time frame. 144 00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:56,710 I'm just going to do it this time, 145 00:13:57,039 --> 00:13:59,890 even though it's been really hard in the past. 146 00:14:00,559 --> 00:14:04,690 What happens with that is that we're able to spurt towards some goal, 147 00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:05,919 success there, 148 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:08,090 but it's very difficult to maintain. 149 00:14:09,590 --> 00:14:12,719 So what I'd like you to do when you have a goal, 150 00:14:12,729 --> 00:14:14,099 you have a time frame, 151 00:14:14,109 --> 00:14:16,359 you have a little chunk that you're gonna work on. 152 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:18,630 Say to yourself, 153 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:22,549 what's my strategy for accomplishing this goal? 154 00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:26,390 Never move forward without a strategy. 155 00:14:26,659 --> 00:14:28,349 If you can't think of one, 156 00:14:28,359 --> 00:14:30,710 ask a friend or a family member, 157 00:14:34,210 --> 00:14:42,869 one strategy could be in the area of remembering how can I remember to take my supplies to school? 158 00:14:42,979 --> 00:14:46,979 How can I remember to do the dishes before I go to bed? 159 00:14:48,650 --> 00:14:53,409 Another strategy may have to do with adding fun to the task. 160 00:14:53,770 --> 00:14:56,340 How can I make this task less, 161 00:14:56,349 --> 00:14:57,260 boring, 162 00:14:57,270 --> 00:14:58,750 less mundane? 163 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:04,469 Maybe I could do it while music is playing or an audio book, 164 00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:11,419 maybe I could make a race out of it to see if I can get it done within a certain amount of time. 165 00:15:12,340 --> 00:15:22,229 Perhaps there are ways that I could use a strategy to make the task easier learning about how to streamline the task, 166 00:15:22,289 --> 00:15:26,640 looking at other ways people do the task to make it easier, 167 00:15:26,650 --> 00:15:28,140 take up less time. 168 00:15:30,210 --> 00:15:35,460 Another strategy I could use is offering myself a reward for success. 169 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:40,710 Maybe I say if I'm successful for eight weeks in a row, 170 00:15:40,969 --> 00:15:46,030 I get to buy myself this thing that is not too expensive, 171 00:15:46,039 --> 00:15:47,179 but usually, 172 00:15:47,340 --> 00:15:47,630 you know, 173 00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:49,510 that would be off limits for me. 174 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:54,429 But I'm gonna reward myself after I reach this time frame. 175 00:15:55,450 --> 00:15:57,719 After you've chosen a strategy, 176 00:15:58,099 --> 00:15:59,659 you have a time frame, 177 00:15:59,669 --> 00:16:03,179 you have a small goal that you're set up for success with. 178 00:16:03,190 --> 00:16:08,789 Then it's time to put your plan into action after the week or two weeks. 179 00:16:08,799 --> 00:16:15,830 What you're going to do is to kind of have an evaluation and debriefing with yourself. 180 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:21,020 The first part of the evaluation is I achieve my goal. 181 00:16:21,190 --> 00:16:36,049 Also think about how effortful was it to achieve what I did achieve if you achieve the goal and you were consistent about it across two weeks and it did not feel too hard or effortful. 182 00:16:36,229 --> 00:16:42,700 You may decide that you're ready to add another step forward goal to your momentum. 183 00:16:43,010 --> 00:16:47,739 If you did 10% of the small task toward your goal, 184 00:16:47,750 --> 00:16:58,530 you could add on another 10% goal or you could add on another 15 minutes of the type of task you were doing to meet your goal. 185 00:16:58,539 --> 00:17:05,660 Remember to keep a strategy if you need to shift based on your new goal, 186 00:17:05,670 --> 00:17:07,530 your new step forward goal, 187 00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:08,949 be sure to do that. 188 00:17:12,650 --> 00:17:16,459 If you achieved your goal, 189 00:17:16,699 --> 00:17:23,500 but you pulled it off and are really tired and don't know if you could do that again, 190 00:17:24,098 --> 00:17:30,218 then you probably need to evaluate whether the goal is small enough, 191 00:17:30,229 --> 00:17:37,869 whether it's easy enough in the sense that we all have areas of our life that we would say, 192 00:17:38,509 --> 00:17:39,088 you know, 193 00:17:39,098 --> 00:17:40,489 for whatever reason, 194 00:17:40,499 --> 00:17:42,909 this area really wipes me out. 195 00:17:42,918 --> 00:17:48,759 I just have a huge struggle in this category of my life. 196 00:17:48,769 --> 00:17:51,568 Maybe you need to start in a different category. 197 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:55,569 But if you can make the step forward goal easier, 198 00:17:55,930 --> 00:17:56,930 do that. 199 00:17:57,510 --> 00:18:00,780 If you can use a strategy that will help you more, 200 00:18:00,849 --> 00:18:02,089 go ahead and do that, 201 00:18:05,170 --> 00:18:18,390 you wouldn't want to add on to your plan until you got that goal achieved in a way that starts to feel pretty effortless like I'm doing this because this is what I do. 202 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:19,979 I have momentum for it. 203 00:18:19,989 --> 00:18:27,150 It's built into my routine and then you don't have to effort as much to keep it going. 204 00:18:27,479 --> 00:18:30,609 That's when you add just a little bit more to it. 205 00:18:32,439 --> 00:18:35,170 What do you do if you did not meet your goal? 206 00:18:35,209 --> 00:18:35,530 Well, 207 00:18:35,540 --> 00:18:36,859 that's fine too. 208 00:18:37,020 --> 00:18:42,079 You would step back and evaluate why you may ask yourself. 209 00:18:42,089 --> 00:18:46,449 Did I use the strategy that I created for this goal? 210 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:52,020 If you did and you were not successful with the goal, 211 00:18:52,089 --> 00:19:00,119 you probably have to reevaluate the strategy or you may need to add another strategy on top of that. 212 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,150 Maybe you used a remembering goal, 213 00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,969 but that wasn't enough to give you the momentum. 214 00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:12,750 You need to just get that new behavioral set into your repertoire. 215 00:19:13,130 --> 00:19:15,849 Maybe you also need to make it easier, 216 00:19:15,859 --> 00:19:19,030 make it fun or give yourself a reward. 217 00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:21,829 Maybe you need someone to be accountable to, 218 00:19:21,839 --> 00:19:23,589 maybe that's your strategy. 219 00:19:24,430 --> 00:19:26,130 You should also ask yourself, 220 00:19:26,140 --> 00:19:28,089 did I use my strategy? 221 00:19:28,859 --> 00:19:30,949 If I didn't reach my goals? 222 00:19:30,959 --> 00:19:38,089 Maybe it was because I had the intention of using reminders or making it fun. 223 00:19:38,209 --> 00:19:41,680 But I didn't actually follow through with that. 224 00:19:43,589 --> 00:19:44,130 Well, 225 00:19:44,140 --> 00:19:46,849 then you would evaluate that as well. 226 00:19:47,130 --> 00:19:49,209 Is this strategy too hard? 227 00:19:49,910 --> 00:19:54,449 Is it too complex and involved in energy draining? 228 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:57,290 What other strategies could you think of? 229 00:19:57,599 --> 00:20:03,280 Do you need to layer something in or do you have to scrap the first strategy and try again? 230 00:20:04,209 --> 00:20:08,239 What strategies do other people use or find successful? 231 00:20:08,869 --> 00:20:12,020 What ideas can you glean from other people? 232 00:20:12,030 --> 00:20:16,920 You're always able to say no to someone's suggestion of a strategy, 233 00:20:16,949 --> 00:20:19,640 but only if you have a counter offer. 234 00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:21,000 If your boss says, 235 00:20:21,010 --> 00:20:21,260 hey, 236 00:20:21,270 --> 00:20:22,839 this still isn't working. 237 00:20:22,959 --> 00:20:25,199 I'd like you to try this strategy. 238 00:20:25,619 --> 00:20:26,540 You can say no, 239 00:20:26,550 --> 00:20:28,660 I'd rather not use that strategy, 240 00:20:28,670 --> 00:20:31,339 but only if you have a counter offer. 241 00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:37,089 If you can say I've thought of this other strategy, 242 00:20:37,099 --> 00:20:38,729 then you can run with that. 243 00:20:39,609 --> 00:20:40,020 Now, 244 00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:49,469 the nice thing about this process is you're learning not only perhaps a new skill that is your goal. 245 00:20:49,479 --> 00:20:54,829 Um learning how to create a family culture that works in your home. 246 00:20:55,229 --> 00:20:59,780 Uh Learning how to stay regulated in a way that matches you. 247 00:21:00,430 --> 00:21:02,199 You're not only learning those things, 248 00:21:02,209 --> 00:21:06,890 but you're learning this process of growth. 249 00:21:07,150 --> 00:21:12,650 So I wish I were in a different place in this area of my life. 250 00:21:13,739 --> 00:21:17,280 How can I start that shift? 251 00:21:17,290 --> 00:21:22,510 How can I think about doing it without feeling overwhelmed or like, 252 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:24,689 I just can't get any, 253 00:21:25,069 --> 00:21:25,939 um, 254 00:21:26,219 --> 00:21:30,790 I can't get any forward momentum toward change. 255 00:21:30,910 --> 00:21:31,410 Well, 256 00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:38,089 this is a way that you can practice a process for living with more intention. 257 00:21:38,510 --> 00:21:40,420 Where would I like to be? 258 00:21:40,430 --> 00:21:42,500 Where am I right now? 259 00:21:42,819 --> 00:21:47,060 How can I make small steps forward to guarantee that? 260 00:21:47,069 --> 00:21:48,959 I know I can have success. 261 00:21:49,459 --> 00:21:56,979 How can I create strategy and timelines and then evaluate what needs to be shifted? 262 00:21:57,729 --> 00:22:03,819 And what you'll notice too is you may get a great momentum for your goal. 263 00:22:03,829 --> 00:22:10,810 Maybe you are doing the dishes every night or you're moving for 15 minutes after work every day. 264 00:22:11,079 --> 00:22:17,500 What will happen is you'll have momentum for that for maybe a long period of time. 265 00:22:18,290 --> 00:22:19,839 Then at some point, 266 00:22:19,849 --> 00:22:31,000 something in your life will change and you'll realize that now the strategies you were using aren't really gonna work quite as well anymore. 267 00:22:31,170 --> 00:22:34,630 And that's really part of that normal human process too. 268 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:36,369 And because you know, 269 00:22:36,380 --> 00:22:49,859 the process of creating strategies of evaluating things of making these small steps forward that can be successful when you do need to reevaluate and get back on board with the goal. 270 00:22:50,290 --> 00:23:00,040 That's something that you can go back to that skill in itself is something you keep with you and you can use in lots of different areas of life. 271 00:23:00,050 --> 00:23:03,780 We will continue to talk about living with intention, 272 00:23:03,790 --> 00:23:09,844 meaning growth and having success with all steps forward. 273 00:23:09,954 --> 00:23:17,564 Next time when we talk more about strategies and goals within these different categories, 274 00:23:17,574 --> 00:23:20,025 we mentioned special interests, 275 00:23:20,035 --> 00:23:22,135 health and wellness regulation, 276 00:23:22,194 --> 00:23:23,255 relationships, 277 00:23:23,265 --> 00:23:26,785 everyday tasks and family and household culture. 278 00:23:27,255 --> 00:23:28,785 I hope you'll join me then.    

You may feel dissatisfaction or discomfort in some realm of life that you want to shift. But where to start and how to succeed? In this first episode in a series on intentional living, Dr. Regan identifies ways to plan the foundation of change so that you experience growth without becoming overwhelmed.  As referenced in the current episode:  adultandgeriatricautism.com Autism and Regulation podcast episode #1   Dr. Regan's online presentations with Zur Institute March, 2023: Is my Client on the Spectrum? Dispelling Myths About Autism Diagnoses Autism Assessment: The Seven Diagnostic Criteria Brought to Life   Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians      

Dr. K covers the latest COVID news for 2023, including the newest variant, updates on the bivalent booster, what happens when the public health emergency ends, & more. She also covers the problem of doctors inappropriately not prescribing Paxlovid (the best treatment if an older adult does catch COVID), and how to advocate to get it successfully. The post 132 COVID 2023 News Update for Aging Adults (2.23.23 Edition) appeared first on Better Health While Aging.

Join Dr. Regan for this episode on the neurodiversity movement, autism affirming services, and the importance of allowing for complexity in our understanding of autism.    Dr. Regan's online presentations with Zur Institute March, 2023: Is my Client on the Spectrum? Dispelling Myths About Autism Diagnoses Autism Assessment: The Seven Diagnostic Criteria Brought to Life Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians   Read the transcript here:   1 00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:10,400 Welcome to the podcast Autism in the Adult. 2 00:00:10,540 --> 00:00:12,310 I'm Dr Theresa Regan, 3 00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:14,060 a neuropsychologist, 4 00:00:14,100 --> 00:00:16,150 the mother of a teen on the spectrum, 5 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:22,680 and the founder and director of an autism diagnostic clinic in Central Illinois for adolescents, 6 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:24,720 adults and aging adults. 7 00:00:26,490 --> 00:00:32,300 Sometimes I get emails from people asking if I perform autism assessments for adults. 8 00:00:32,310 --> 00:00:33,080 And indeed, 9 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:35,030 that's my full time job. 10 00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:36,850 So I go to work every day. 11 00:00:36,850 --> 00:00:42,730 I see patients and clients in a medical setting for evaluations and recommendations. 12 00:00:44,260 --> 00:00:58,920 Then I also have other things that I've chosen to do in the topic area of autism because I'm passionate about the people impacted and the positive things that can happen when we understand more about the autistic neurology. 13 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:12,240 I do have a few online presentations coming up through Zur Institute which is a continuing education program for professionals. 14 00:01:12,250 --> 00:01:20,970 I'll include a link in the podcast show notes to these programs so you can look at the descriptions and registration links. 15 00:01:21,340 --> 00:01:26,440 And the first one is Tuesday March 7th 2023. 16 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:27,740 For one hour. 17 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:34,100 The presentation covers information about the basic foundational rules of the autism. 18 00:01:34,100 --> 00:01:45,750 Diagnostic criteria Will be dispelling myths about the foundations and requirements that may prevent people from being referred for assessment appropriately. 19 00:01:45,870 --> 00:01:48,740 And the second presentation is on Saturday, 20 00:01:48,750 --> 00:01:50,210 March 25, 21 00:01:50,220 --> 00:02:02,410 that's for two hours and this presentation will highlight the seven diagnostic criteria what they mean and also what they look like in a clinical case of a young adult female, 22 00:02:02,410 --> 00:02:05,580 just to illustrate some of the concepts. 23 00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:08,860 So if you are a clinician or you know, 24 00:02:08,870 --> 00:02:13,420 of professionals in your area who are wanting to learn more about autism, 25 00:02:13,430 --> 00:02:16,420 this may be a good resource opportunity. 26 00:02:16,940 --> 00:02:22,020 The topic of the podcast today is actually not the topic that I had been working on. 27 00:02:22,030 --> 00:02:23,860 Uh to record, 28 00:02:23,870 --> 00:02:29,120 I've had multiple interactions about a different topic over the last few weeks. 29 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:35,460 And it really struck me as perhaps something that would be timely to talk about or helpful to process. 30 00:02:35,470 --> 00:02:37,090 And so in this episode, 31 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:47,760 I wanted to talk about neurodiversity and autism affirming approaches to serving those on the spectrum. 32 00:02:47,770 --> 00:02:54,790 I'm gonna talk about three things within the context of this episode. 33 00:02:54,790 --> 00:02:57,480 One is just what are we talking about? 34 00:02:57,480 --> 00:03:01,050 What's the definition when we talk about neuro diversity? 35 00:03:01,060 --> 00:03:11,630 The second is what kinds of conditions or characteristics might we want to include under the umbrella of neuro diversity? 36 00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:30,220 And the third has to do with a viewpoint that some put forward that says that only individuals who have diagnoses of neuro divergence should be offering services to those on the spectrum. 37 00:03:30,230 --> 00:03:32,820 When we talk about neuro diversity, 38 00:03:32,830 --> 00:03:40,800 we're basically talking about the idea that people experience and interact with the world around them in many different ways. 39 00:03:40,810 --> 00:03:44,570 And this concept of course, 40 00:03:44,570 --> 00:03:47,450 neuro being neurology and diversity, 41 00:03:47,460 --> 00:03:48,760 meaning diversity. 42 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:58,080 So we all have variations in our neurologic wiring and there's no one quote right way of thinking, 43 00:03:58,090 --> 00:04:05,700 learning and behaving and that all neurologic differences should be appreciated as part of natural variation. 44 00:04:06,370 --> 00:04:10,350 And I explain those concepts, 45 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:16,990 knowing and wanting to communicate that people will defined neuro diversity differently. 46 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:23,630 And so I'm trying to use phrases that are commonly used um in describing what that means, 47 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:25,750 one person can say that, 48 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:26,230 you know, 49 00:04:26,230 --> 00:04:31,060 that isn't really what it means to me and that's completely fine. 50 00:04:31,070 --> 00:04:39,020 It's such a complex topic that getting it right as everyone would define it is difficult. 51 00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:40,260 But basically, 52 00:04:40,270 --> 00:05:06,220 it is this understanding that there's variations on our wiring and there's this emphasis that there's not one right way to be connected neurologically um at its best when we're talking about neuro diversity as a concept and autism affirmation as a concept. 53 00:05:06,230 --> 00:05:29,960 It really helps ward against an approach to intervention that may focus on correcting or fixing behaviors in the neuro diverse individual only because the behaviors are unusual or atypical. When a therapist is neuro diversity affirming or autism affirming, 54 00:05:29,970 --> 00:05:44,310 this is often used to emphasize that they understand that neuro divergence itself is not a flaw or an illness that needs to be fixed or corrected. 55 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:47,820 And we're gonna talk about this a little bit more later. 56 00:05:47,820 --> 00:05:52,640 But neuro divergence often refers to autism, 57 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:56,030 but it is a much larger umbrella right now. 58 00:05:56,030 --> 00:05:58,020 And so we'll talk about that as well. 59 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:02,940 However, 60 00:06:04,180 --> 00:06:05,410 at the same time, 61 00:06:05,410 --> 00:06:23,080 we hope that the autism affirming therapist can also acknowledge some parts of autism that really may create a lot of difficulty or pain for the person that's presenting for care. 62 00:06:23,090 --> 00:06:25,230 So at its best, 63 00:06:25,230 --> 00:06:39,420 we really hope there's this balance of understanding of the gifts and strengths in the autistic experience in the struggles and difficulties that someone may really inherently experience, 64 00:06:39,430 --> 00:06:43,960 not because of the attitudes of society or, 65 00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:44,690 or anything, 66 00:06:44,690 --> 00:06:51,640 but because this neurologic piece is really giving them difficulty. At it's extreme, 67 00:06:52,260 --> 00:07:24,600 there may be some in the autism affirming community or the neuro divergence community that really emphasize that the autistic experience is very positive in its essence that the diverse experience should always be emphasized as strength and the variation doesn't involve any inherent struggle. 68 00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:28,740 I think that when 69 00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:32,970 we get to that categorical kind of description, 70 00:07:32,980 --> 00:07:39,740 whether someone is talking about the autistic experience is all bad... or all good, 71 00:07:40,010 --> 00:07:40,430 you know, 72 00:07:40,430 --> 00:07:49,340 I think we're missing the complexity of the human experience and specifically here, 73 00:07:49,340 --> 00:07:51,210 the autistic experience. 74 00:07:51,220 --> 00:08:05,430 So what I would say about the movement and the concept of neuro diversity is it's really best when we're able to stay centered in the complexity... in the center, 75 00:08:05,430 --> 00:08:07,550 not those two extreme categories, 76 00:08:07,550 --> 00:08:18,990 but in the center of this mix of good and difficult where most often the truth lies in that center in that complexity. 77 00:08:19,990 --> 00:08:24,140 Let me explain what the DSM 5, 78 00:08:24,140 --> 00:08:32,620 that's the diagnostic manual for many of the conditions that people refer to as neurodivergent... 79 00:08:32,630 --> 00:08:39,240 I want to talk about the criteria they use for when something is called a diagnosis. 80 00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,880 So this is not specific to autism. 81 00:08:41,890 --> 00:08:46,040 This could include learning disability, 82 00:08:46,050 --> 00:08:47,250 autism, 83 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,360 psychosis, 84 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:49,400 depression, 85 00:08:49,410 --> 00:08:50,960 lots of different things. 86 00:08:50,960 --> 00:09:01,810 And there are two things that they really focus on as being present in order for a diagnosis to be relevant. 87 00:09:01,810 --> 00:09:04,760 And so one is that the condition, 88 00:09:04,770 --> 00:09:19,440 the constellation of characteristics, is statistically atypical ... that it's not the most common constellation that we see in the daily human experience. 89 00:09:19,450 --> 00:09:23,410 It's not the most common state. 90 00:09:24,060 --> 00:09:24,340 Now, 91 00:09:24,340 --> 00:09:33,970 the second thing though is that the atypical constellation of characteristics must cause some form of difficulty for the individual, 92 00:09:33,980 --> 00:09:34,490 you know, 93 00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:36,500 does it work against their physical health? 94 00:09:36,500 --> 00:09:39,580 Does it reduce their safety in some situations? 95 00:09:39,590 --> 00:09:43,320 Is it associated with internal distress, 96 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,810 does it prevent the person from reaching goals for daily living, 97 00:09:46,810 --> 00:09:48,290 like maintaining work? 98 00:09:48,550 --> 00:09:51,660 Is it associated with pain and relationships? 99 00:09:51,660 --> 00:10:01,860 So it has to have some functional impact that has worked against the well being of this individual. 100 00:10:01,870 --> 00:10:02,490 So, 101 00:10:02,490 --> 00:10:08,070 both things according to the diagnostic manual must be present for a diagnosis. 102 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:11,530 There has to be this atypical constellation, 103 00:10:11,530 --> 00:10:20,590 but there also has to be ... that this atypical constellation has been the root of some functional struggle. 104 00:10:21,450 --> 00:10:31,440 So if there are individuals who have the autistic neurology and it has never been a source of functional difficulty, 105 00:10:31,450 --> 00:10:36,950 they actually don't meet the criteria for a diagnosis as defined in the in the manual. 106 00:10:36,960 --> 00:10:40,710 So when we're talking about having an official diagnosis, 107 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:42,010 that would be part of it, 108 00:10:42,010 --> 00:10:43,540 that in some season, 109 00:10:43,540 --> 00:10:44,700 in some way, 110 00:10:44,710 --> 00:10:50,130 there's really been a struggle associated with those neurologic characteristics. 111 00:10:50,790 --> 00:10:51,680 And this is why, 112 00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:52,560 for example, 113 00:10:52,560 --> 00:10:57,680 depression is a diagnosis as well. It's not rare, 114 00:10:57,690 --> 00:11:00,650 but ... it's not the most typical mood state. 115 00:11:00,650 --> 00:11:04,600 And when people get stuck in that atypical mood state, 116 00:11:04,610 --> 00:11:08,230 it causes these functional areas of difficulty. 117 00:11:08,230 --> 00:11:09,330 It's hard to get up, 118 00:11:09,330 --> 00:11:10,470 it's hard to go to work, 119 00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:12,660 it's hard to maintain relationships. 120 00:11:12,850 --> 00:11:22,610 And so that's where we shift from saying something is diverse to something that 121 00:11:22,620 --> 00:11:29,740 we're calling a diagnosis... that rather than just being mood-diversity where gosh, 122 00:11:29,740 --> 00:11:31,410 I've had a bad day, 123 00:11:31,930 --> 00:11:37,590 but it's really not impacted functionally how I'm doing across time... 124 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:48,460 but when I get stuck in this mood state and it's really interfering with wellness in my daily life, 125 00:11:48,460 --> 00:11:50,440 that's when it's a diagnosis. 126 00:11:51,270 --> 00:11:51,660 Now, 127 00:11:51,660 --> 00:12:01,130 autism as a diagnosis does require that difficulty at some point in your life that you've really had the autistic neurology, 128 00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:07,590 making it hard to function in a way that's comfortable where you're achieving your goals. 129 00:12:08,030 --> 00:12:08,440 Now, 130 00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:13,360 autism as a diagnosis occurs in 2% of individuals, 131 00:12:13,370 --> 00:12:15,290 they would meet the full criteria. 132 00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:27,890 The neurologic characteristics hang together in those individuals because they hang together anatomically and they have also impacted the individual's well being their goals, 133 00:12:27,890 --> 00:12:29,390 their functional life. 134 00:12:29,910 --> 00:12:30,170 Now, 135 00:12:30,170 --> 00:12:36,400 does this mean that the neurology of autism causes pain or distress in every way? 136 00:12:36,410 --> 00:12:37,870 Absolutely not. 137 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:43,160 Does it mean that the difficulty is constant throughout the whole lifespan? 138 00:12:43,580 --> 00:12:44,440 No. 139 00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:46,100 So in my viewpoint, 140 00:12:46,110 --> 00:12:52,160 all humans have characteristics that work for them in some ways and against them in some ways. 141 00:12:52,170 --> 00:12:54,870 And this is true in autism as well. 142 00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:55,870 For example, 143 00:12:55,870 --> 00:13:00,570 the attention to detail can be a great strength in some work projects. 144 00:13:00,570 --> 00:13:08,360 Whereas it can really create difficulty when the ultimate goal is speed and generalization rather than detail. 145 00:13:09,070 --> 00:13:22,980 So much of the benefit for the autistic individual and those who love them is this increased awareness of how their characteristics may work for them or against them in different contexts or across life seasons? 146 00:13:23,510 --> 00:13:23,790 Now, 147 00:13:23,790 --> 00:13:25,180 having said that again, 148 00:13:25,180 --> 00:13:40,460 remember that individuals who meet that full criteria by definition have had a level of neurologic difference that really increases the risk of difficulty and a lot of these functional areas compared with someone with a different neurology, 149 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:45,930 we know that every human will have this mix of gifts and weaknesses, 150 00:13:45,930 --> 00:13:47,270 strengths and struggles, 151 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:49,510 abilities and limitations. 152 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:51,510 And for one person, 153 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:52,070 you know, 154 00:13:52,070 --> 00:13:57,780 he may excel in athletics but struggle to read at functional levels. 155 00:13:57,790 --> 00:14:05,040 So he can't read a contract or release or a medical form without struggling and getting taken advantage of, 156 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:09,390 that's a neurologic difference in that reading comprehension. 157 00:14:09,790 --> 00:14:18,050 Another person may be able to produce wonderful needlework that requires really good fine motor skills appreciation of color 158 00:14:18,050 --> 00:14:18,770 palettes, 159 00:14:18,770 --> 00:14:20,660 creativity and design. 160 00:14:20,670 --> 00:14:21,450 However, 161 00:14:21,450 --> 00:14:30,420 they might struggle to keep blood sugar levels even and their pancreas just isn't helping them with this task as much as we would wish. 162 00:14:30,430 --> 00:14:33,810 And maybe they take insulin shots because of this. 163 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:39,960 I bring these examples up just to say that in our human form, 164 00:14:39,970 --> 00:14:48,650 we all have gifts and strengths and triumphs and skill sets. 165 00:14:48,660 --> 00:14:59,580 And we also will have some form of limitation or struggle at some part in our life and my struggle, 166 00:14:59,580 --> 00:15:03,850 my limitation in my human form may be different than yours. 167 00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:12,010 But I know that the commonality of the human experience is that you also will have some strength, 168 00:15:12,010 --> 00:15:16,520 some gift in your human form and some limitation, 169 00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:19,500 some struggle in that human form. 170 00:15:19,510 --> 00:15:27,980 And for some their area of gift and struggle may involve aspects of this autistic neurology. 171 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:34,380 I think we do best for each other when we appreciate all sides of our humanity, 172 00:15:34,420 --> 00:15:36,550 that these are my strengths, 173 00:15:36,550 --> 00:15:38,030 these are my limitations, 174 00:15:38,030 --> 00:15:39,710 this is my humanity, 175 00:15:39,870 --> 00:15:43,840 this mix of good and difficult and strong and weak. 176 00:15:43,850 --> 00:15:55,770 And I'll always have a mix of this and this is what it is to be human and to truly show honor and respect and appreciation to the personhood of each individual. 177 00:15:55,780 --> 00:16:00,960 We allow all those things in the mix to be viewed and discussed. 178 00:16:01,030 --> 00:16:04,340 There's no reason to only talk about easy things, 179 00:16:04,340 --> 00:16:05,120 bright things, 180 00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:06,220 successful things. 181 00:16:06,220 --> 00:16:13,630 We can talk about all the messiness of each of our humanity and still affirm that every single person, 182 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:15,420 no matter their age, 183 00:16:15,430 --> 00:16:16,030 culture, 184 00:16:16,030 --> 00:16:17,340 health abilities, 185 00:16:17,340 --> 00:16:18,580 spirituality, 186 00:16:18,590 --> 00:16:19,340 gender, 187 00:16:19,340 --> 00:16:20,880 any of these things, 188 00:16:20,890 --> 00:16:38,020 every single person is filled with inherent value and is deserving of honor and respect because that is inherent to their personhood and having a gift does not make them any more valued in having limitations. 189 00:16:38,020 --> 00:16:41,120 Does not take away any of their value. 190 00:16:41,550 --> 00:16:44,140 When someone is celebrating and rejoicing, 191 00:16:44,140 --> 00:16:47,220 we can come alongside and celebrate too. 192 00:16:47,420 --> 00:16:49,440 And when someone is grieving, 193 00:16:49,450 --> 00:16:54,530 when someone is struggling with something or coming across their own limitations, 194 00:16:54,530 --> 00:16:58,540 we also come alongside them in this as well. 195 00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:00,860 We can acknowledge the struggle, 196 00:17:00,870 --> 00:17:03,640 we can offer community assistance, 197 00:17:03,650 --> 00:17:10,640 anything that we can bring to the table in this moment of of humanity and coming together. 198 00:17:10,650 --> 00:17:13,890 So let's talk about the second topic, 199 00:17:13,890 --> 00:17:25,000 which is What kinds of diagnoses or characteristics do we want to consider as under that neuro diversity umbrella. 200 00:17:25,010 --> 00:17:38,640 So the neuro diversity movement began in the 90s as a way of talking about autism and sometimes attention deficit and the real benefit of it was that it, 201 00:17:38,650 --> 00:17:56,780 it championed the humanity of everyone with neuro diverse characteristics and made sure that they weren't being looked at as less than or somehow not as valued in society. 202 00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:07,690 Examples of conditions that are currently considered under the neuro diversity umbrella often include in addition to autism and attention deficit, 203 00:18:07,700 --> 00:18:10,370 things like obsessive compulsive disorder, 204 00:18:10,370 --> 00:18:11,680 bipolar disorder, 205 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,020 dyslexia, 206 00:18:13,030 --> 00:18:14,800 and dyspraxia. 207 00:18:15,870 --> 00:18:16,950 But now, 208 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:18,640 even though in the beginning, 209 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:26,350 we often would talk about autism or attention deficit as being a large part of neuro diversity. 210 00:18:26,360 --> 00:18:27,010 Now, 211 00:18:27,010 --> 00:18:43,020 there's a much bigger umbrella that people um talk about as involving these kinds of conditions and it's kind of growing all the time and there's not an inherent  difficulty with that, 212 00:18:43,020 --> 00:19:02,280 but there are some challenges with having the umbrella be very narrow or having it be really um inclusive because neuro diversity at its most inclusive is anything that has diverse neurology as part of its definition. 213 00:19:02,290 --> 00:19:03,510 So, 214 00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:08,910 if we're going to expand it beyond autism and attention deficit, 215 00:19:08,910 --> 00:19:18,120 that we're really going to um be expanding it to include everything with diverse neurology. 216 00:19:18,120 --> 00:19:23,850 And so that's going to include things like spinal cord injury, 217 00:19:23,860 --> 00:19:24,710 stroke, 218 00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:25,970 cerebral palsy, 219 00:19:25,970 --> 00:19:28,150 parkinson's traumatic brain injury, 220 00:19:28,150 --> 00:19:29,230 encephalitis, 221 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:30,430 brain tumor, 222 00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:31,750 multiple sclerosis, 223 00:19:31,750 --> 00:19:32,820 hydrocephalus, 224 00:19:32,830 --> 00:19:34,020 Alzheimer's disease, 225 00:19:34,020 --> 00:19:35,920 and all other forms of dementia, 226 00:19:35,930 --> 00:19:37,980 all learning difficulties, 227 00:19:37,990 --> 00:19:40,880 intellectual disability and so on. 228 00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:46,300 If we're going to use the umbrella to be all inclusive of neurologic diversity, 229 00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:51,090 we are essentially going to be talking about all neurologic conditions. 230 00:19:51,340 --> 00:19:52,170 In which case, 231 00:19:52,170 --> 00:19:56,240 we really kind of lost the meaning of the term itself. 232 00:19:56,250 --> 00:20:01,010 So I'm not sure that it's as powerful a term or meaningful a term. 233 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:04,120 But if that's what we prefer, 234 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,900 we certainly can do this. 235 00:20:05,910 --> 00:20:07,620 I just think at some point, 236 00:20:07,620 --> 00:20:15,560 we'll need to decide what meaning do we want the term to include and to be specific, 237 00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:28,640 knowing that there are a lot of neuro diverse conditions that would have to be under the umbrella if we're going to be all inclusive for neuro diverse conditions. 238 00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:29,910 So, 239 00:20:29,910 --> 00:20:30,620 in summary, 240 00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:31,600 so far, 241 00:20:31,610 --> 00:20:38,470 I would suggest that we think about what kind of meaning we want the term to have as far as neurology. 242 00:20:38,470 --> 00:20:48,170 And then also are we able to approach autism in a way that acknowledges all the strengths and the struggles that each individual presents with? 243 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:51,240 Always understanding that in all of this mix, 244 00:20:51,250 --> 00:21:06,870 every person is filled with inherent value and you are important and your importance is never defined by strengths or limitations and you will always have a mix of both because you are human. 245 00:21:07,660 --> 00:21:08,000 Now, 246 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:23,280 in this final section will be addressing an opinion that some have put forth that states that it's really not okay for individuals without an autism diagnosis or some form of neurodivergent diagnosis. 247 00:21:23,290 --> 00:21:23,700 Again, 248 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,270 this is ill defined, 249 00:21:25,460 --> 00:21:34,370 but it's not all right for these individuals to provide services or input to autistic individuals essentially, 250 00:21:34,370 --> 00:21:38,750 only autistic providers should serve those on the spectrum. 251 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:40,780 Uh For example, 252 00:21:40,780 --> 00:21:51,550 there are some workplaces that serve neurodivergent clients and only hire those with neurodivergent diagnoses. 253 00:21:52,110 --> 00:21:57,940 I think my response to this is similar to my response to the topics that we've covered so far, 254 00:21:57,940 --> 00:22:12,740 which is basically that I think the truth and the life and the best outcomes are often found in the center rather than um at either categorical opinion. 255 00:22:13,020 --> 00:22:17,950 So anytime we're tempted to go for that uh kind of simple, 256 00:22:17,950 --> 00:22:18,870 straightforward, 257 00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:21,550 only this and never that kind of thought process, 258 00:22:21,550 --> 00:22:28,380 we're really limiting the truth and limiting the good that we'll find in the complex middle. 259 00:22:29,030 --> 00:22:30,200 And in this case, 260 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:44,190 I think the wonderful thing about this approach is it does emphasize uh welcoming all kinds of diverse inputs to discussion services and program development as far as they do go, 261 00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:51,260 which is neuro diversity that we bring together the neuro diverse to serve the neuro diverse. 262 00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:53,030 Now, 263 00:22:53,030 --> 00:22:55,620 I love to hear people's stories, 264 00:22:55,630 --> 00:22:56,580 their opinions, 265 00:22:56,580 --> 00:23:01,170 their perspectives and whether those are from the autistic individual, 266 00:23:01,170 --> 00:23:01,940 their friends, 267 00:23:01,940 --> 00:23:03,320 their family members, 268 00:23:03,330 --> 00:23:07,320 whether those are from individuals and a helping profession, 269 00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:08,550 anyone, 270 00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:12,350 it enriches me over and over and over again. 271 00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:14,390 However, 272 00:23:14,390 --> 00:23:24,700 I think saying that only autistic providers should come alongside the autistic to provide input is limiting in a way that would work against the greatest good. 273 00:23:24,710 --> 00:23:31,330 Not because the autistic providers viewpoint is not valid or in some way less than others viewpoint. 274 00:23:31,340 --> 00:23:44,400 But because the breadth of specialization and experience that benefits individuals is so huge that no one group of individuals can ever cover all of that information. 275 00:23:44,410 --> 00:23:54,020 And I think if we tap into our diverse knowledge and experience that we will have the richest information to share. 276 00:23:54,030 --> 00:23:59,240 So having occupational therapists and neurologists and neuropsychologist, 277 00:23:59,250 --> 00:24:02,290 experts in academic learning and nutrition, 278 00:24:02,300 --> 00:24:05,200 all of these things are so beneficial, 279 00:24:05,210 --> 00:24:13,150 such richness of knowledge and experience that it's the exchange here that brings the blessing. 280 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:18,030 It's increasing the diversity of input that brings the blessing. 281 00:24:18,490 --> 00:24:27,720 And some of these individuals in their specialization will be on the spectrum and some will not in other examples. 282 00:24:27,730 --> 00:24:28,200 You know, 283 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:36,470 if I had multiple sclerosis and I would only receive care from a neurologist who had the same diagnosis. 284 00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:41,670 I would be limiting some of my um options. 285 00:24:41,670 --> 00:24:43,740 There may not be someone available. 286 00:24:43,750 --> 00:24:47,690 Uh This person may not be as experienced as someone else. 287 00:24:47,700 --> 00:24:52,030 Um I may be limiting where I could have a whole team of people. 288 00:24:52,030 --> 00:24:53,090 Maybe I'm saying no, 289 00:24:53,090 --> 00:24:54,870 I just want this one person. 290 00:24:55,300 --> 00:24:59,490 It would get even more difficult if I had two conditions, 291 00:24:59,490 --> 00:24:59,930 right? 292 00:24:59,930 --> 00:25:04,870 That I have multiple sclerosis and congestive heart failure. 293 00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:05,390 Now, 294 00:25:05,390 --> 00:25:12,550 do I have to find a provider that has both or I can see a heart provider that also has congestive heart failure? 295 00:25:13,230 --> 00:25:22,290 It's not that there's not value in getting input from others who share characteristics about your life and have walked in your shoes and get it. 296 00:25:22,300 --> 00:25:25,220 I think that's really valuable. 297 00:25:25,700 --> 00:25:32,230 But there's also value in getting input from those who don't share the same characteristics, 298 00:25:32,230 --> 00:25:40,150 but they have areas of expertise that they can offer some input that you wouldn't get in other places. 299 00:25:40,250 --> 00:25:41,190 Essentially, 300 00:25:41,190 --> 00:25:46,240 we're talking about the benefits of diversity and getting diverse input. 301 00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:50,810 When you have some struggles or limitations in any form of your life, 302 00:25:51,140 --> 00:25:57,930 then you get to take in the perspectives of all those other people and you decide what's helpful to you. 303 00:25:57,940 --> 00:26:03,160 But you have a lot of diverse input and rather than limiting the input, 304 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:04,140 you're getting, 305 00:26:04,150 --> 00:26:11,020 you get to take in this information process it and say this has really helped me. 306 00:26:11,030 --> 00:26:17,290 This is not helpful to me and you get to be the filter for what you take into your own life. 307 00:26:17,810 --> 00:26:20,720 This is a really complex topic. 308 00:26:20,730 --> 00:26:23,220 There's a lot of emotions involved. 309 00:26:23,230 --> 00:26:24,410 I think in the end, 310 00:26:24,410 --> 00:26:38,470 what I'm saying is just that being able to be in the center of complexity helps me the most to understand the good and the difficult, 311 00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:43,220 the strength and the struggle of all kinds of human experience. 312 00:26:43,230 --> 00:26:54,750 And I would emphasize that the inherent value of the person is in their personhood and that never changes. 313 00:26:54,760 --> 00:27:02,820 So whether we're working with someone on something that they're celebrating or something that they're grieving, 314 00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:07,200 we can come along either way and say you are important, 315 00:27:07,580 --> 00:27:09,110 your personhood, 316 00:27:09,120 --> 00:27:11,300 you have this inherent value. 317 00:27:11,310 --> 00:27:13,600 I value that you've come, 318 00:27:13,610 --> 00:27:21,320 I value your story and your input and let me come alongside you and add what I can to your journey. 319 00:27:22,070 --> 00:27:31,790 I'm glad that you joined me today and that you're part of this podcast community and I hope you join me next time for another great topic.  

Join Dr. Regan for this episode on the quest for balance on the autism spectrum. Whether it's emotional regulation, attention, sleep, social interactions, task initiation, finances and more, finding the "just right" state is difficult for many on the spectrum. Book: The Science of Making Friends   Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians Read the Transcript Here:    1 00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:11,610 Hello and welcome back to the podcast Autism in the Adult. 2 00:00:11,620 --> 00:00:12,730 I am your host, 3 00:00:12,730 --> 00:00:14,390 Dr Theresa Regan, 4 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:16,120 a neuropsychologist, 5 00:00:16,130 --> 00:00:18,470 a certified autism specialist. 6 00:00:18,480 --> 00:00:23,930 The director of an autism diagnostic clinic for adolescents, 7 00:00:23,940 --> 00:00:29,590 adults and aging adults in central Illinois and the mother of a teen on the spectrum. 8 00:00:30,660 --> 00:00:48,140 I'm glad you're joining me today for this episode that I'm going to call autism and "just right."  This is actually a great topic that was suggested by a listener from Finland and I hope that I am pronouncing the name correctly. 9 00:00:48,140 --> 00:01:07,680 I think it's Maya ... Maya wrote about questions and struggles within the topic of balance in life when you have that autistic neurology, 10 00:01:07,690 --> 00:01:09,270 Maya wrote this. 11 00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:23,030 I would so much love to hear what you have to say about autistic people and the struggle we have with striking a balance in situations where we have to create an appropriate view on or understanding of things? 12 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:29,350 I am convinced that this is the major autistic difficulty that I personally struggle with. 13 00:01:30,110 --> 00:01:34,570 It shows up in different forms for me and on many levels. 14 00:01:35,700 --> 00:01:39,890 I could take a few examples so that you understand what I mean? 15 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:44,520 Because most often this is not linked to intelligence, 16 00:01:44,530 --> 00:01:46,350 for example, 17 00:01:46,350 --> 00:01:47,490 is this person, 18 00:01:47,500 --> 00:01:50,100 a friend who respects me or not, 19 00:01:50,740 --> 00:01:53,230 am I too skinny or even to fat? 20 00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:58,050 Should I contact a doctor because of this thing that I'm feeling right now. 21 00:01:58,570 --> 00:02:01,470 How far should I stand by this person's side? 22 00:02:01,660 --> 00:02:04,500 How much should I help him or her? 23 00:02:05,210 --> 00:02:10,820 Exactly how well should I perform in this university course in order to pass. 24 00:02:11,910 --> 00:02:15,030 I want to thank Maya for writing about that. 25 00:02:15,040 --> 00:02:29,300 Um this is something I've thought about as well and I think it's one of those really great ways to conceptualize autism aside from specific details. 26 00:02:29,310 --> 00:02:34,510 So sometimes to get the most meaning out of what you're feeling, 27 00:02:34,510 --> 00:02:47,890 it can help to step back and say how is it that all these little pieces of the autistic experience hang together in some ways it can feel so granular, 28 00:02:47,900 --> 00:02:51,500 like so many things are impacted. 29 00:02:51,510 --> 00:02:59,120 Why do these things happen at the same time and when we have ways of conceptualizing it? 30 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:02,450 Um I think it brings meaning. 31 00:03:02,460 --> 00:03:10,290 It helps these little pieces come together as why do I have trouble with these 12 things? 32 00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:11,380 Well, 33 00:03:11,390 --> 00:03:19,090 these 12 things have a thread that go through and when we can step back and see that thread that joins things, 34 00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:23,020 I think it really makes things more meaningful. 35 00:03:23,030 --> 00:03:26,210 Um and so that's what I want to do with this topic. 36 00:03:26,210 --> 00:03:32,870 Today I call this the just right state. 37 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,570 So she was talking about balance. 38 00:03:35,570 --> 00:03:38,230 That's another great way to term it. 39 00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:43,950 Um A lot of times with the neurology that we're talking about, 40 00:03:43,950 --> 00:03:55,770 somebody will have difficulty finding that just right spot of balance where whatever they're attempting is not too much or too little. 41 00:03:56,130 --> 00:04:24,560 And ideally our neurology should help us flow in these areas that we can flow and adjust and we have this innate sense of where we should land to be just right for this context for this person for this topic and we can shift because just right will look different in one setting that it will in another setting or across time. 42 00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:30,320 So there's a lot of innit nous and flow in this ability to find just right. 43 00:04:31,650 --> 00:04:35,920 We've talked about difficulty with regulation in a very broad sense. 44 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:47,530 We did a series on regulation issues having to do with alertness and attention and emotions and getting to that just rate state in those areas. 45 00:04:47,540 --> 00:04:59,270 But I think what Maya is pointing out is that regulation and balance and just right is a thread that goes through a lot of other areas with autism as well. 46 00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:04,170 So let's take a few areas and see how this just right. 47 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:08,330 Uh this quest for just right is difficult. 48 00:05:08,950 --> 00:05:10,990 Let's take the social area. 49 00:05:11,590 --> 00:05:19,020 So some things that were struggling with that would capture this difficulty with just right would be, 50 00:05:19,030 --> 00:05:22,400 how much should I be speaking right now to this person? 51 00:05:22,410 --> 00:05:24,690 How much detail should I be giving? 52 00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:27,830 How much personal information should I share? 53 00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:34,660 What is the just right intensity and level of excitement for this context or person? 54 00:05:35,020 --> 00:05:41,240 What is just right as I'm interacting with a boss versus an acquaintance? 55 00:05:41,250 --> 00:05:43,090 How much eye contact? 56 00:05:43,100 --> 00:05:44,700 Too much or too little? 57 00:05:44,710 --> 00:05:55,420 How much emotional expression should I be using without looking false or like I'm putting on a show or that I don't care at all. 58 00:05:56,380 --> 00:05:57,410 For example, 59 00:05:57,420 --> 00:06:01,380 opening gifts without looking just flat or board, 60 00:06:01,390 --> 00:06:07,660 but without looking like an actor that's pretending to be happy with a gift. 61 00:06:08,690 --> 00:06:11,720 How much should I give this person? 62 00:06:12,830 --> 00:06:15,130 How long should I stand by them? 63 00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:17,200 How much money should I loan them? 64 00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,490 How many times should I give them a ride or a lift? 65 00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:24,040 How much leeway should I give in a relationship? 66 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,270 For example, 67 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:31,540 I know people are complex and I can be friends with people who do things that I don't agree with. 68 00:06:31,550 --> 00:06:34,120 But at what point do I say? 69 00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:34,420 Yeah, 70 00:06:34,420 --> 00:06:37,970 this is really not a healthy relationship for me. 71 00:06:37,970 --> 00:06:40,130 I need to end this relationship. 72 00:06:41,290 --> 00:06:44,200 How close should I make this relationship? 73 00:06:44,210 --> 00:06:52,470 And how soon what is the just right closeness and the timing of a relationship? 74 00:06:52,480 --> 00:07:03,690 So some people on the spectrum struggle because they really want some definition to the relationship quickly because this in between state, 75 00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,770 this undefined state feels really uncomfortable. 76 00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:08,600 So they might say, 77 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:20,770 well let's just get married right away because we know we're right for each other and in essence defining and structuring the relationship feels better than this. 78 00:07:20,770 --> 00:07:21,300 Huh? 79 00:07:21,310 --> 00:07:23,600 I don't know what's gonna happen with this relationship. 80 00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:27,070 It feels safer and more defined and more predictable. 81 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:36,130 Others will break up a relationship because they don't want to be in that undefined spot that in between place. 82 00:07:36,140 --> 00:07:42,420 Um So how much is just right as far as closeness in a relationship. 83 00:07:43,810 --> 00:07:52,850 What is the just right number of times to text or phone someone if they don't call you back or to extend an invitation to someone. 84 00:07:52,860 --> 00:07:58,530 Now sometimes there are rules of thumb for something like that. 85 00:07:58,540 --> 00:08:06,670 There's a nice book that I like called the Science of Making Friends that I'll link in the show notes that talks about, 86 00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:06,970 you know, 87 00:08:06,970 --> 00:08:14,120 you don't text or call again once you've done so twice without a return text or call. 88 00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:28,880 I once worked with a couple and we were trying to really increase his ability to bring some nurturance and emotional content to the relationship. 89 00:08:28,890 --> 00:08:38,330 And I worked with him on being aware that one way to show his wife love is to compliment her. 90 00:08:38,340 --> 00:08:40,960 So we kind of worked on that as a goal, 91 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:41,780 practiced it, 92 00:08:41,780 --> 00:08:45,090 role played it and he put it into action. 93 00:08:45,820 --> 00:08:48,310 The problem was then his wife said, 94 00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:50,820 well now he's complimenting me too much. 95 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,570 It is the difficulty, 96 00:08:54,570 --> 00:08:55,820 isn't it? 97 00:08:55,870 --> 00:08:58,880 Like I can learn a strategy, 98 00:08:58,890 --> 00:09:02,390 I can apply new knowledge, 99 00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:08,690 but the getting the just right amount, 100 00:09:08,690 --> 00:09:09,880 the just right moment, 101 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,970 the just right compliment boy. 102 00:09:11,970 --> 00:09:13,510 That's really difficult. 103 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:15,260 It's difficult for anyone. 104 00:09:15,270 --> 00:09:16,010 Uh, 105 00:09:16,010 --> 00:09:18,580 and even more so on the spectrum, 106 00:09:20,830 --> 00:09:24,280 let's look at finances for that just right state. 107 00:09:25,130 --> 00:09:39,340 It seems common for individuals on the spectrum to either lean toward spending too much perhaps on their special interests or other things that cut their eye or to spend too little. 108 00:09:40,490 --> 00:09:41,090 Um, 109 00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:56,050 there are people that have lots of money in a savings account or other type of account but they don't want to withdraw anything to fix the roof or to buy an updated phone. 110 00:09:57,660 --> 00:10:01,970 What is the amount of spending that is just right. 111 00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:12,100 There are guides for budgeting but it can still feel really elusive to get just right in specific personal situations. 112 00:10:12,110 --> 00:10:13,490 So yeah, 113 00:10:13,490 --> 00:10:14,840 this is the principle, 114 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:16,080 this is the guideline, 115 00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:17,750 this is the percentage, 116 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:25,380 but it is hard to have to look that framework up and not have a sense, 117 00:10:25,380 --> 00:10:29,070 an innate sense like yeah, 118 00:10:29,070 --> 00:10:33,180 I really need to get this roof repaired some will say, 119 00:10:33,190 --> 00:10:33,730 yeah, 120 00:10:33,730 --> 00:10:35,960 I know that I can ask for advice, 121 00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:41,950 I know that I can use this budget but I wish I had this innate sense of yeah, 122 00:10:41,950 --> 00:10:46,440 I really need to update this in my home or boy, 123 00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:51,570 I've spent too much on this area and not enough on this other area. 124 00:10:53,460 --> 00:10:54,240 They'll say, 125 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:54,540 you know, 126 00:10:54,540 --> 00:11:02,840 it's difficult to have a feel for it instead of having to stick to some type of formula and maybe feeling like, 127 00:11:02,850 --> 00:11:09,360 well what would that rule of thumb look like in this situation and how would it apply to this other case. 128 00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:16,490 Let's look at just right as it relates to task completion on the spectrum. 129 00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:22,400 What is the just right amount of completion for some people on the spectrum, 130 00:11:22,410 --> 00:11:30,960 completion is very important but when is something complete and what is the just right amount of accuracy and detail? 131 00:11:30,970 --> 00:11:44,080 Some may feel like I need to finish one task before I start another task or I can't go to bed until I read all of these pages assigned from the class of the previous day. 132 00:11:45,060 --> 00:11:49,120 What is the right amount of detail? 133 00:11:49,130 --> 00:11:51,290 What is the right amount of speed? 134 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:57,100 Have I done enough that this assignment is complete, 135 00:11:57,140 --> 00:12:03,440 especially when we get to adulthood tasks don't have a clear cut off. 136 00:12:04,510 --> 00:12:16,370 It's not like there are five math problems and we finish each one and we know the task is complete and maybe that we have a research paper or we have a software project. 137 00:12:16,380 --> 00:12:16,830 Well, 138 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:18,040 when is it complete? 139 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:19,620 When is it good enough? 140 00:12:23,130 --> 00:12:25,020 That difficulty knowing? 141 00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:25,480 Hey, 142 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:29,120 I haven't attended a task B at all, 143 00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:33,420 but I've overworked on task A and how do I balance that? 144 00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:35,030 When do I know that? 145 00:12:35,030 --> 00:12:36,560 That's the difficulty. 146 00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:50,450 One person I worked with said I've always had the strong feeling that a newspaper needs to be read completely from cover to cover from every page that there, 147 00:12:50,460 --> 00:12:53,030 there is a completion that's important. 148 00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:56,700 You can't just read an article here and there. 149 00:12:56,750 --> 00:12:58,630 That's just not right. 150 00:12:59,420 --> 00:13:06,680 Another person may feel I have to finish this test completely before I start this other project. 151 00:13:07,650 --> 00:13:18,980 Even though the first task was something a coworker asked me about and this next one I have to complete is something my boss asked me to work on. 152 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:32,520 It's difficult sometimes for the individual with that autistic neurology to understand that all details do not have the same importance. 153 00:13:33,110 --> 00:13:38,970 Um There are people um on the spectrum who feel like, 154 00:13:38,980 --> 00:13:48,350 well every detail is going to be important so it has to be included and the neurology there just isn't helping the person know like Yeah, 155 00:13:48,350 --> 00:13:54,010 but in this instance this part is not as important as this part, 156 00:13:56,290 --> 00:14:06,880 it can be really hard to get the neurology to shift uh to adjust if a task needs to be done quickly but does not need to be as accurate. 157 00:14:07,390 --> 00:14:12,510 So meeting deadlines might really be difficult if your boss says to you, 158 00:14:12,510 --> 00:14:15,910 hey this project needs to be done quickly. 159 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:21,720 It doesn't really need to be detailed but I have to have it ready for a meeting tomorrow at noon. 160 00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:24,990 I just want to give a broad overview. 161 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:29,830 Details are not important that can feel actually very stressful. 162 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:32,990 Well what does a broad overview look like? 163 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,600 And will, 164 00:14:34,610 --> 00:14:41,230 will I feel okay stopping when there are other details available. 165 00:14:43,910 --> 00:14:49,200 This is also related to the topic that maya brought up about working on a course, 166 00:14:49,210 --> 00:14:50,780 a university class. 167 00:14:50,790 --> 00:14:57,460 How much work do I need to do in order to do a good job? 168 00:14:57,470 --> 00:15:00,290 What if I could have done more? 169 00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,820 Could have done better. 170 00:15:03,090 --> 00:15:06,500 How many a's do I need to get to be a good student? 171 00:15:06,500 --> 00:15:11,730 How can I hit the mark of balance with accuracy and speed? 172 00:15:12,910 --> 00:15:14,800 How can I balance that? 173 00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:18,460 Everything doesn't have the same importance at the same time, 174 00:15:20,530 --> 00:15:26,400 something may be able to go undone while something else cannot wait another minute. 175 00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:27,490 So triaging, 176 00:15:27,490 --> 00:15:32,400 how do I triage quickly based on importance? 177 00:15:33,210 --> 00:15:36,360 How thorough do I need to be on this project? 178 00:15:36,870 --> 00:15:41,420 If the professor said I need to cite 10 sources, 179 00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:44,070 Can my brain let go? 180 00:15:44,070 --> 00:15:52,440 The other 25 sources I might be able to get and how can I just innately have a feel for? 181 00:15:52,450 --> 00:15:53,360 Okay, 182 00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:54,250 this is done, 183 00:15:54,260 --> 00:15:58,120 this is this project is finished and it's good to go. 184 00:15:59,020 --> 00:16:11,500 Maya also noted in her email that sometimes the approach to dealing with this difficulty is to get input from others about what might be just right in a situation, 185 00:16:12,310 --> 00:16:15,570 but that approach doesn't always feel practical. 186 00:16:15,580 --> 00:16:23,180 Like who could I ask or there's a deadline and people aren't around this just isn't practical. 187 00:16:23,190 --> 00:16:25,520 It also takes a lot of energy. 188 00:16:25,530 --> 00:16:32,760 And do I always bother the same person or how many times do I ask for input and who do I ask? 189 00:16:34,050 --> 00:16:35,610 So first of all, 190 00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:40,850 let's talk about that difficulty finding the just right state. 191 00:16:41,510 --> 00:16:46,470 So this could be within alertness and behavioral activation, 192 00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:49,310 it can be within attention. 193 00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:52,790 Like what is the just right amount of attention. 194 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:56,210 It's somewhere between distractible and hyper focus. 195 00:16:56,220 --> 00:17:08,840 What is the just right space for our emotions while it's to be psychologically present and um clearheaded and calm. 196 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:12,010 What is just right for test completion, 197 00:17:12,010 --> 00:17:15,280 finances working out nutrition, 198 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:17,130 dieting all of these things. 199 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:26,470 Let me give you an example for my own life that has to do with another physical just rate dilemma. 200 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:35,250 So one of the things that I think about that I think also highlights this is that personally, 201 00:17:35,260 --> 00:17:42,950 it's kind of a joke in my family that I have really bad depth perception and again, 202 00:17:42,950 --> 00:17:51,470 it's kind of a joke because at some point you just have to laugh and luckily I always think I have less room. 203 00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:55,770 So it's not that I go around hitting things with the car, 204 00:17:56,070 --> 00:17:57,870 but you know, 205 00:17:57,880 --> 00:18:01,350 there's lots of room left and it does get kind of funny, 206 00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:12,470 I wish so in the back of my mind that I could learn to compensate for that because I do get tired of laughing at myself and having to be a good sport about this, 207 00:18:12,490 --> 00:18:18,620 just silly thing that I've parked so far away from where I could have parked, 208 00:18:20,790 --> 00:18:29,250 I realized that I always leave two ft from where I could have pulled up. 209 00:18:29,780 --> 00:18:37,640 So there's this remarkable consistency for me in that area that I can't tell what's just right, 210 00:18:37,650 --> 00:18:42,600 but somehow I'm always two ft from where I probably should be. 211 00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:43,650 So I thought, 212 00:18:43,660 --> 00:18:45,100 okay, 213 00:18:45,110 --> 00:18:57,570 well I will compensate for this difficulty with just right by going an extra two ft because I actually think I can Gauge what two ft would be. 214 00:18:59,020 --> 00:19:06,830 So I started to do that and lo and behold I that just does not work. 215 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:16,110 I cannot compensate to get to intellectually get to the where the just right status. 216 00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:31,770 So as you can imagine I'm either to end up touching the wall or the um edge of the parking space with my car or I end up still being well below where I could be. 217 00:19:33,350 --> 00:19:48,420 So for me that's just another example that if my eyes in my brain are not able to show me the just rate state, 218 00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:54,700 there's not much I can do about that unfortunately. 219 00:19:55,990 --> 00:20:02,700 Um And even though I intellectually think of a strategy to compensate, 220 00:20:02,710 --> 00:20:06,940 it still doesn't mean that I can hit the just right spot. 221 00:20:06,950 --> 00:20:08,680 Well I should do this more, 222 00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:10,140 I should do this less. 223 00:20:10,150 --> 00:20:29,430 Um So I actually believe and in my experience with clients I think that ability that flow for that feel for the just rate state is something that is very difficult to compensate for. 224 00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:33,770 And I'm not sure that there are great ways to do that. 225 00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:46,350 I think what we typically do is we suggest intellectual compensations kind of like what I tried to do for my uh driving and parking. 226 00:20:46,360 --> 00:21:15,230 Um And I think those things are helpful in some ways but there's still this gap between where we would want to be as far as having a flow and an efficiency a feel for that would be so great rather than having to try to gauge to hit that spot a little bit better. 227 00:21:17,430 --> 00:21:23,400 Some of the compensations that are helpful would be, 228 00:21:23,410 --> 00:21:24,330 um, 229 00:21:24,340 --> 00:21:28,280 I think having the self awareness is helpful. 230 00:21:28,290 --> 00:21:29,750 So for example, 231 00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:33,660 I know that I have this difficulty, 232 00:21:33,660 --> 00:21:36,480 so if I have a passenger in the car and they're like, 233 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:37,040 you know, 234 00:21:37,050 --> 00:21:42,450 you can pull up some more because I have that self awareness. 235 00:21:42,460 --> 00:21:45,850 I have a place for that to integrate that comment. 236 00:21:45,850 --> 00:21:47,070 And I can say, 237 00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,080 oh yeah, 238 00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:50,320 I probably can, 239 00:21:50,330 --> 00:21:51,520 I can't really tell you, 240 00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:52,840 tell me when to stop. 241 00:21:53,470 --> 00:21:54,000 Um, 242 00:21:54,010 --> 00:21:57,510 so I'm able to say yes to that comment. 243 00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:58,060 Like, 244 00:21:58,070 --> 00:21:58,480 oh yeah, 245 00:21:58,480 --> 00:21:59,640 I have a place for that. 246 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:00,680 That makes sense. 247 00:22:00,690 --> 00:22:01,900 I have that awareness. 248 00:22:01,900 --> 00:22:05,930 I have that understanding of myself and I can't compensate myself. 249 00:22:05,940 --> 00:22:09,010 But if you're here and you're willing to help, 250 00:22:09,010 --> 00:22:09,940 let's do that. 251 00:22:11,310 --> 00:22:14,460 So having a place to put comments like, 252 00:22:14,470 --> 00:22:15,650 um, 253 00:22:15,660 --> 00:22:16,350 you know, 254 00:22:16,350 --> 00:22:25,390 you don't have to call me so many times or um I really don't think that person is mad at you. 255 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:25,840 You know, 256 00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:27,590 when we get feedback like that, 257 00:22:27,590 --> 00:22:30,950 it it does help us to have a place where we say, 258 00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:31,650 oh, 259 00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:33,400 I didn't realize that, 260 00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:39,570 but I do know I can make errors in that in that area sometimes. 261 00:22:40,420 --> 00:22:41,170 Um, 262 00:22:41,810 --> 00:22:47,440 I also think that the awareness can be about what we lean toward. 263 00:22:47,450 --> 00:22:50,780 So if we have trouble finding the just right spot, 264 00:22:50,780 --> 00:23:03,780 sometimes we lean toward going toward too much or too little and in my case I lean toward uh leaving too much room or thinking I don't have enough room. 265 00:23:03,780 --> 00:23:05,790 So I lean in the same direction. 266 00:23:07,100 --> 00:23:07,800 Um, 267 00:23:07,810 --> 00:23:17,440 in the case of autism and the categories that we've talked about sometimes that's true for individuals in those categories as well. 268 00:23:17,450 --> 00:23:28,640 So I have clients that always lean toward thinking that they haven't done enough or they always lean toward thinking, 269 00:23:28,900 --> 00:23:29,500 um, 270 00:23:29,510 --> 00:23:36,160 someone's mad at them or thinking that they shouldn't spend money on something. 271 00:23:36,170 --> 00:23:40,680 So they have a way that they lean so they can say to themselves, 272 00:23:40,690 --> 00:23:46,090 I realize about myself that when I am off of just right, 273 00:23:46,090 --> 00:23:48,780 I'm usually in this direction in this category. 274 00:23:50,230 --> 00:23:51,840 That's also helpful. 275 00:23:51,850 --> 00:23:52,600 Um, 276 00:23:52,610 --> 00:23:54,780 because I do think again, 277 00:23:54,780 --> 00:23:56,510 it gives us a place to put things. 278 00:23:56,510 --> 00:24:06,800 So let's say that someone is working on a university project and there's nobody there to guide them through and they're thinking, 279 00:24:08,050 --> 00:24:14,600 I've checked all these specific boxes that the professor asked for, 280 00:24:14,610 --> 00:24:17,390 but I just have this feeling that I should do more. 281 00:24:17,390 --> 00:24:19,290 I know I could do more, 282 00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:21,910 at least they're able to say to themselves, 283 00:24:21,910 --> 00:24:22,590 you know, 284 00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:26,720 when I'm uncertain about whether I've done enough, 285 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,410 usually I've already done too much. 286 00:24:29,420 --> 00:24:30,060 Um, 287 00:24:30,060 --> 00:24:34,730 so that can be a guide for them of sorts where they could say, 288 00:24:34,730 --> 00:24:35,150 okay, 289 00:24:35,150 --> 00:24:36,170 I'm gonna, 290 00:24:36,180 --> 00:24:38,730 I'm gonna complete this task, 291 00:24:38,730 --> 00:24:42,370 I'm gonna call it completed because um, 292 00:24:43,210 --> 00:24:47,890 I know I lean in that direction and I feel like I've ticked the basic boxes. 293 00:24:52,170 --> 00:24:58,140 Another thing that can be helpful then is to have some way to communicate. 294 00:24:58,150 --> 00:25:06,210 Maybe some uh sentences or phrases or ways of putting things that you've practiced ahead of time, 295 00:25:06,890 --> 00:25:13,520 that communicate to others about your difficulty finding just right in a specific area. 296 00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:17,880 So let's take some examples. 297 00:25:17,890 --> 00:25:26,920 And this could be communication beforehand or uh in the midst or after something has happened, 298 00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:29,720 an example would be, 299 00:25:29,730 --> 00:25:42,750 let's say someone is starting a new romantic relationship and they have the self awareness that sometimes when they come home from work, 300 00:25:42,750 --> 00:25:48,130 they are really shut down psychologically and they're in their own head, 301 00:25:48,140 --> 00:25:48,780 you know, 302 00:25:48,780 --> 00:25:53,590 that they don't talk a lot to their partners, 303 00:25:53,590 --> 00:25:59,110 they don't interact much and sometimes partners need something that they aren't, 304 00:25:59,120 --> 00:26:00,180 aren't giving. 305 00:26:00,190 --> 00:26:02,410 So with that awareness, 306 00:26:02,420 --> 00:26:06,300 they could say to the partner ahead of time, 307 00:26:06,930 --> 00:26:07,640 hey, 308 00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:17,420 I'm I've been learning about myself uh and one of the things I've learned is that I guess I tend to be shut down after work when I come home. 309 00:26:17,430 --> 00:26:20,940 So if you need help with something, 310 00:26:20,950 --> 00:26:23,620 if you um you know, 311 00:26:23,620 --> 00:26:27,580 want to tell me a specific story or something that's happened, 312 00:26:27,580 --> 00:26:39,820 you might really just have to um have me look you in the eye and tell me exactly what you need because I might not read the situation very well on my own. 313 00:26:40,550 --> 00:26:43,360 So that would be a case where, 314 00:26:43,370 --> 00:26:44,020 you know, 315 00:26:44,020 --> 00:26:45,950 you have difficulty finding just right, 316 00:26:45,950 --> 00:26:49,600 you're not going to be able to compensate after work, 317 00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:52,210 you're already kind of offline, 318 00:26:52,220 --> 00:27:02,410 but you could explain a bit of the context even though you can't compensate yourself or shift that you could give some context. 319 00:27:03,990 --> 00:27:08,890 I think the value of that is not only giving the person that information, 320 00:27:08,890 --> 00:27:15,040 but I think telling people that you're trying to learn more about yourself, 321 00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:19,350 I think is just a really good thing to communicate. 322 00:27:19,360 --> 00:27:32,340 People value that we all know we're imperfect humans and we're learning about ourselves and we're growing and that we're open to feedback. 323 00:27:32,350 --> 00:27:33,350 So, 324 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:33,830 you know, 325 00:27:33,830 --> 00:27:36,280 if feel free to give me feedback, 326 00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:49,630 if I'm if I'm offline and and I can try to adjust an example of communicating after the fact or maybe in the midst of a fact. 327 00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:52,540 So let's take a different example. 328 00:27:52,540 --> 00:28:06,350 We're going to take the example of being at work and there is a project that you've been put in charge of and you miss the deadline and your boss is gonna do coaching with you about that. 329 00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:15,290 Um So you get feedback from your boss who is frustrated that the deadline was missed. 330 00:28:15,860 --> 00:28:16,890 That you know, 331 00:28:16,890 --> 00:28:25,660 he he really needs to be able to count on someone that can meet deadlines because these are very important to the bottom line of their department. 332 00:28:25,670 --> 00:28:30,540 And if you can't be a team player and get those deadlines done, 333 00:28:30,540 --> 00:28:34,670 then the whole team suffers again. 334 00:28:34,670 --> 00:28:39,980 This would be an opportunity for you to say in your head, 335 00:28:39,990 --> 00:28:40,380 you know, 336 00:28:40,380 --> 00:28:43,970 to think uh here here, 337 00:28:43,970 --> 00:28:44,860 this comes up. 338 00:28:44,860 --> 00:28:53,530 I know that I do tend to focus on accuracy more than speed and I didn't realize it, 339 00:28:53,530 --> 00:28:58,300 but uh that's come into play here and so out loud to your boss, 340 00:28:58,310 --> 00:29:01,140 you could say a similar thing, 341 00:29:01,140 --> 00:29:02,330 you could say, 342 00:29:03,230 --> 00:29:04,700 you know, 343 00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:07,410 I'm really sorry that that happened, 344 00:29:07,420 --> 00:29:31,260 I've been learning about myself that I really do tend toward getting into the detail and sometimes I sacrifice speed without really meaning to and what I realize helps me is and then you can give a specific thing that you would like. 345 00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:36,870 Um so one of the things an employee might ask for would be, 346 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:55,720 it would help me if I could set uh deadlines for parts of the project rather than the completion so that I really stay on pace and what I'd like to do for this next project you've given me is break it into six parts and I'm going to, 347 00:29:55,730 --> 00:29:56,390 you know, 348 00:29:56,390 --> 00:30:04,290 give you dates for my deadlines for each of these parts and you can tell me if the deadlines need to be adjusted. 349 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:11,090 Um so what you're doing is saying I have this self awareness and I'm growing in this area, 350 00:30:11,630 --> 00:30:19,600 you're showing that you're open to feedback and then you're also showing that you're going to try a new strategy. 351 00:30:20,650 --> 00:30:31,310 So sometimes there can be ways of trying to um navigate this difficulty with just right, 352 00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:38,760 we talked before about how another navigation tool might might be rules of thumb or general principles. 353 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:40,900 So here's my budget, 354 00:30:40,900 --> 00:30:50,230 this is what I'm supposed to spend or not spend or um rules of thumb for completing a university course. 355 00:30:51,540 --> 00:31:10,790 But I think the truth of that struggle of not having that innate feel for just right really is something core in the autism neurology that I haven't found um a way to shift. 356 00:31:10,790 --> 00:31:20,690 I think that's really a core neurologic piece that I'm either too much or too little and if I hit just right, 357 00:31:20,700 --> 00:31:21,590 that's great. 358 00:31:21,590 --> 00:31:23,760 But I have such a hard time staying there. 359 00:31:25,490 --> 00:31:39,900 I want to thank my again for that insight and um I think even when there aren't answers to correct a challenge or to kind of make it easier over time, 360 00:31:39,910 --> 00:31:46,180 I think that awareness that conceptualization that oh why do I do this? 361 00:31:46,180 --> 00:31:48,650 Why am I really good at detail? 362 00:31:48,650 --> 00:31:50,590 But I really struggle with deadlines. 363 00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:54,390 Well this all hangs together neurologically, 364 00:31:54,390 --> 00:32:05,120 it's part of that difficulty finding just right and I do think that that conceptualization that self awareness is important in and of itself. 365 00:32:05,130 --> 00:32:10,960 Um and I do think the understanding that that crosses over categories, 366 00:32:10,970 --> 00:32:21,170 social and task completion and sleep and attention and all of these other things that are really difficult to balance. 367 00:32:22,410 --> 00:32:26,960 Thank you Maya and I hope you all join me for our next episode     

Dr. K covers what to know about COVID and flu this winter, including what to expect from the new BQ.1 subvariants, and how to stay safer during winter gatherings. She also covers how well the fall bivalent booster is working and how to use a HEPA filter for safer home gatherings. The post 131 COVID Update for Aging Adults (12.8.22 Edition) appeared first on Better Health While Aging.

Join Dr. Regan for this episode on neurodiversity and holiday celebrations. Sometimes the most memorable moments come from holding tightly to our foundations and releasing other things that don't fit our season of life or individual needs.  Planning a Merry Holiday on the Autism Spectrum, podcast episode 2020   Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians    

Join Dr. Regan for the final episode in this series on autism misdiagnosis. This episode focuses on anxiety-related conditions and when their diagnosis may mean that autism is never considered. Wrapping up this series, Dr. Regan also discusses that after all assessments are concluded, there will be instances when no diagnosis of autism can or should be made. Previous episode -- Abuse, Neglect, and Relational Pain on the Autism Spectrum   Dr. Regan's Resources Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians Read the transcript here: 1 00:00:06,730 --> 00:00:07,190 Hello, 2 00:00:07,190 --> 00:00:09,130 this is Dr Theresa Regan. 3 00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:11,790 I am the host of this podcast, 4 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:13,320 autism in the adult. 5 00:00:13,330 --> 00:00:15,480 I'm a neuropsychologist, 6 00:00:15,490 --> 00:00:23,650 the director of an adult diagnostic autism clinic in central Illinois and a certified autism specialist. 7 00:00:24,330 --> 00:00:32,480 You are joining me for the 4th and final episode of a series on autism and misdiagnosis. 8 00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:36,480 The first episode covered foundational information. 9 00:00:36,490 --> 00:00:39,320 Why does misdiagnosis occur? 10 00:00:40,390 --> 00:00:47,110 That is, why is autism missed while other conditions may be diagnosed Instead. 11 00:00:48,040 --> 00:01:02,860 The next episode focused on personality disorders and we specifically reviewed information about borderline personality and narcissistic personality as potential misdiagnoses for autism. 12 00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:12,730 The 3rd episode covered information about bipolar disorder and depression and today's episode will focus on anxiety. 13 00:01:14,620 --> 00:01:25,760 I should say that we could continue this misdiagnosis series for quite some time and cover other really common areas of misdiagnosis ... like schizophrenia, 14 00:01:25,760 --> 00:01:27,390 psychotic conditions, 15 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:34,810 dementia and those involving behavioral dysregulation things like oppositional defiant disorder. 16 00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:52,250 I'm not going to dive into all the possible categories because I feel like we've covered several common misdiagnoses and also because the main goal of the series has been to just introduce the concept that misdiagnosis does occur. 17 00:01:52,260 --> 00:02:08,990 And also to illustrate why ... essentially to point out what kinds of elements in the neurology of autism may lead to diagnoses describing these single points but missing the big picture diagnosis of autism. 18 00:02:12,090 --> 00:02:32,480 So we covered the possible misdiagnosis of depression last episode and we're going to talk about anxiety today ... and so I'll share with you my own thoughts based on my personal experiences that anxiety seems to stem at least in part from the neurobiology of autism. 19 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:39,560 Whereas depressed mood as I would define it with this component of emotional struggle, 20 00:02:39,570 --> 00:02:40,790 hopelessness, 21 00:02:40,790 --> 00:02:41,520 helplessness, 22 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:42,540 worthlessness, 23 00:02:42,550 --> 00:02:44,950 loss of pleasure in activities. 24 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:51,540 This seems to be more reactive in the autistic individual to difficult life circumstances. 25 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:59,000 It seems to me that most individuals on the spectrum do experience difficulty with anxiety, 26 00:02:59,010 --> 00:03:07,470 although the strength of this anxiety and how much it impacts their daily life can vary across life seasons. 27 00:03:10,860 --> 00:03:34,090 There is research that has attempted to capture information on the prevalence of anxiety disorders and autism and there are such wide ranging findings that it is a little difficult to really come to a conclusion about the percentage of autistic individuals who do experience noticeable anxiety. 28 00:03:34,970 --> 00:03:43,560 One thing about the research is that many studies focus on individuals who meet full criteria for a certain anxiety disorder. 29 00:03:43,570 --> 00:03:54,510 So, many individuals who experience anxiety and are impacted by this may not meet full criteria and may not be counted in the studies.  Also, 30 00:03:54,510 --> 00:03:59,620 I find that it's really common for some individuals to have significant anxiety, 31 00:03:59,630 --> 00:04:01,920 but it looks like something else. 32 00:04:01,930 --> 00:04:03,160 For example, 33 00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:08,990 meltdowns and outbursts are often triggered by anxiety in the autistic, 34 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:13,460 but they're interpreted as opposition or conduct disorders. 35 00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:18,000 A flight reaction or a freeze reaction... 36 00:04:18,190 --> 00:04:24,260 These are often so quiet that the anxiety piece of the reaction gets missed. 37 00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:26,490 So, 38 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:33,850 my experience is that anxiety is more prevalent than it might at first seem in autism and it's also true, 39 00:04:33,850 --> 00:04:34,290 however, 40 00:04:34,290 --> 00:04:40,860 that I should keep in mind that people do seek appointments with me when they have a season of struggle, 41 00:04:40,870 --> 00:04:49,150 they're coming to a clinic setting because something has really hit them at a time that they need input. 42 00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:59,050 And so it's certainly true that my point of view might be skewed as far as working in this particular setting. 43 00:04:59,050 --> 00:05:05,660 Now, rather than going through each anxiety disorder separately as listed in the diagnostic manual, 44 00:05:05,670 --> 00:05:10,610 let's consider the grouping of generalized anxiety disorder, 45 00:05:10,620 --> 00:05:12,720 social anxiety disorder, 46 00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:16,160 separation anxiety, and agoraphobia together. 47 00:05:18,530 --> 00:05:28,900 It's easy to see that individuals who have this baseline anxiousness, and as I said... 48 00:05:28,910 --> 00:05:33,790 some of which seems to be neurobiological degenerated, 49 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:37,680 that "my system really leans toward anxiety," 50 00:05:37,710 --> 00:05:43,870 that this could easily be diagnosed as generalized anxiety disorder. 51 00:05:44,470 --> 00:05:46,530 The social anxiety disorder. 52 00:05:46,530 --> 00:05:47,250 Again, 53 00:05:47,260 --> 00:05:59,170 very understandable why the individual on the spectrum may have anxiety related to social interactions and possibly being evaluated negatively. 54 00:05:59,180 --> 00:06:09,960 Many people on the spectrum have a fear of being misunderstood and they don't feel solid enough in their interactions and their comprehension of what's going on... to feel like, 55 00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:10,300 "Yeah, 56 00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:11,290 that really went well, 57 00:06:11,290 --> 00:06:16,430 I feel calm and confident about my social interaction." 58 00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:21,440 So that can lead to this anxiety that brings them in for assistance. 59 00:06:22,370 --> 00:06:27,920 Separation anxiety again could be seen in the autistic individual. 60 00:06:27,930 --> 00:06:36,280 It's often the case that the person on the spectrum would really love to feel safe and connected with someone who's supportive. 61 00:06:36,290 --> 00:06:49,760 This might be a parent in younger years, it could also be a particular friend or a sibling that they don't want to go out you know unless they're paired with them, and it could also be a spouse. 62 00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:56,820 And agoraphobia is also something that could be diagnosed for the person on the spectrum. 63 00:06:56,820 --> 00:07:01,270 In the sense that this could be a person who doesn't like to leave their home, 64 00:07:01,280 --> 00:07:03,110 feels overwhelmed in crowds, 65 00:07:03,110 --> 00:07:08,800 wants to be in their own space and just have time alone in their own setting. 66 00:07:11,060 --> 00:07:20,680 So we can see how an individual with autistic neurology may acquire one or more of these diagnoses based on a few elements of their experience. 67 00:07:20,690 --> 00:07:26,120 The problem ends up being not that those features aren't present. 68 00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:28,830 For example there is a social anxiety, 69 00:07:28,830 --> 00:07:30,230 there is an agoraphobia. 70 00:07:30,230 --> 00:07:31,270 However, 71 00:07:31,280 --> 00:07:37,890 once those are diagnosed the diagnostic picture stops. 72 00:07:37,900 --> 00:07:46,170 So um, they don't say "hey, we should also look for autism." And that's the piece that's difficult. 73 00:07:46,180 --> 00:07:50,230 We want autism to be in that differential at the beginning. 74 00:07:51,970 --> 00:07:55,740 For more information on differentials and what that means. 75 00:07:55,750 --> 00:07:58,520 See the first episode in this series. 76 00:07:58,530 --> 00:08:06,090 But essentially what we're saying is that if someone is being evaluated for a diagnosis of generalized anxiety, 77 00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:07,250 social anxiety, 78 00:08:07,250 --> 00:08:16,090 separation anxiety, or agoraphobia ... there should be a trigger in our minds that also puts autism in that assessment process. 79 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:23,960 The current edition of the diagnostic manual does not include PTSD or OCD 82 00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:26,500 under anxiety disorders. 83 00:08:26,510 --> 00:08:37,930 Instead the manual gives these their own sections including trauma and stress or related disorders, and obsessive compulsive and related disorders. 84 00:08:38,610 --> 00:08:39,660 However, 85 00:08:39,670 --> 00:08:42,770 for the cohesiveness of our talk, 86 00:08:42,770 --> 00:08:47,280 I am going to include them in this episode on anxiety. 87 00:08:48,680 --> 00:08:50,780 With regard to PTSD, 88 00:08:50,790 --> 00:08:57,500 you may wish to refer to my previous episode entitled Abuse, Neglect, and Relational Pain 89 00:08:57,500-> 00:09:01,700 On the Autism Spectrum in May of 2021. 90 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:18,890 I'll link the episode in the show notes today. In summary, trauma is a more frequent experience for those on the spectrum than for neurotypical and there are a lot of reasons that this probably occurs. For one, 91 00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:31,280 some infants and children on the spectrum really have difficulty regulating ...and what that means is their ability to feel steady and calm and safe. 92 00:09:31,860 --> 00:09:37,400 This difficulty can be quite a struggle and it can be very externalized. 93 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:41,350 So the child may be crying and not sleeping. 94 00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:52,500 They might have frequent or prolonged meltdowns, may struggle with everyday aspects of life like wearing socks or eating food. Because of these high levels of needs, 95 00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:58,480 the caregivers of the child may also struggle to get enough sleep, to stay calm... 96 00:09:58,490 --> 00:10:05,470 This may lead to difficult interactions both emotionally and psychologically ... and sometimes physically, 97 00:10:06,820 --> 00:10:14,370 The individual on the spectrum may also struggle to recognize risk interpersonally... when they do encounter this. 98 00:10:14,370 --> 00:10:15,830 So for example, 99 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:28,330 many females on the spectrum report that they've been in dating situations and really haven't realized the sexual overtures until they found themselves in a really sexually traumatic situation. 100 00:10:29,390 --> 00:10:38,420 There are other reasons that individuals on the spectrum may experience trauma. And PTSD may not be a misdiagnosis at all. 101 00:10:38,430 --> 00:10:45,900 However many times once this diagnosis is entered in someone's chart, 102 00:10:45,900 --> 00:10:48,170 once it's made... a lot of times, 103 00:10:48,180 --> 00:11:00,150 everything about the person is attributed to trauma reactions and there's been no investigation done to see if the underlying neurologic framework for autism can be detected. 104 00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:09,290 Now ... sometimes the trauma has been so extensive that trauma and neurology just can't be teased apart very easily. 105 00:11:10,010 --> 00:11:14,480 But more often there has never even been a consideration of autism. 106 00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:30,770 Nobody has tried to make this distinction, and there's been this overall conclusion that everything the person experiences and the way they react has to do with the trauma experience. And finally, obsessive compulsive disorder. 107 00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:38,330 Now there are seven diagnostic criteria for autism and the first three are social in nature. 108 00:11:38,370 --> 00:11:46,340 They all must be met. And the last four are described as restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior. 109 00:11:46,350 --> 00:11:48,490 Only two of those need to be met. 110 00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:55,420 Now these criteria include elements of thoughts and behaviors that can be labeled as OCD 113 00:11:55,900 --> 00:11:58,250 if someone's not looking at the big picture. 114 00:11:59,170 --> 00:12:13,910 Examples of these kinds of behaviors or elements might include scrupulosity. For example, being very particular about details, thinking in a black and white manner about what's good and what's bad, 115 00:12:13,910 --> 00:12:15,400 what's right and wrong. 116 00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:18,590 This can include literal thinking. 117 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,470 For those on the spectrum. 118 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:27,300 They may correct others when they're wrong about something and get upset when people break the rules. 119 00:12:27,310 --> 00:12:30,310 They might want to get all the details correct 120 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:33,930 rather than being able to move on to more important things. 121 00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:46,160 These individuals may repeat certain sequences of movements or speech and they may want objects lined up and arranged in particular patterns or a particular order. 122 00:12:46,470 --> 00:12:49,280 They may care about symmetry and repetition. 123 00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:54,480 So this focus on repetition and ritual can resemble OCD 126 00:12:55,310 --> 00:13:00,190 Which can mean that the diagnosis of autism is never explored. 127 00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:02,240 So now, 128 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:06,250 if we step back and we think about all the episodes in this series, 129 00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:11,550 we can see how an individual who presents with a history of multiple diagnoses, 130 00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:14,740 let's say social anxiety disorder, 131 00:13:14,740 --> 00:13:16,090 bipolar disorder, 132 00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:17,780 borderline personality. 133 00:13:17,790 --> 00:13:18,380 Well, 134 00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:25,840 they may actually have one diagnosis that has never even been considered and that is autism. 135 00:13:27,700 --> 00:13:28,170 Now, 136 00:13:28,170 --> 00:13:30,490 before we end this series entirely, 137 00:13:30,490 --> 00:13:41,920 let me add a caveat to balance out this information. Because autism often doesn't get enough attention with clinicians when they're performing assessments, 138 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:44,330 particularly those perhaps with adults, 139 00:13:44,350 --> 00:13:54,250 I do focus a lot on the importance of autism assessment and also the fact that these diagnoses can be specifically included in a differential. 140 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:59,910 Since I've emphasized evaluation and differential diagnosis so much, 141 00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:10,880 I also want to say that in reality there will be times when a skilled clinician will not be able to identify whether autism is present or not. 142 00:14:12,670 --> 00:14:12,990 Now, 143 00:14:12,990 --> 00:14:19,840 autism is identified by a specific pattern in the results and for many reasons, 144 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:28,710 there will be subsets of patients who present without a clear pattern of features and this may reflect how complex their background is, 145 00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,680 how much distress they're in. 146 00:14:30,690 --> 00:14:35,910 But if an autistic pattern is not present or it's obscured by other issues, 147 00:14:35,930 --> 00:14:41,130 then the clinician will not be able to rule in or out the diagnosis of autism. 148 00:14:41,140 --> 00:14:43,640 And rightly so. Now, 149 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:44,340 ultimately, 150 00:14:44,340 --> 00:14:51,040 our first goal needs to be that autism is included in the differential assessment process. 151 00:14:51,150 --> 00:14:55,440 The second goal is that everyone has a correct diagnosis, 152 00:14:55,450 --> 00:14:57,470 whether that's bipolar, 153 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,990 social anxiety, or autism... 154 00:15:01,350 --> 00:15:01,660 Now, 155 00:15:01,670 --> 00:15:04,690 if the autism pattern is not clearly present, 156 00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:07,770 a diagnosis can't and shouldn't be given. 157 00:15:08,430 --> 00:15:18,080 Some individuals will receive feedback that the autism pattern is clearly not present and this is an important piece of information for them. 158 00:15:18,790 --> 00:15:22,600 Others will receive feedback that autism features are present, 159 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:25,460 but not all the criteria are met. 160 00:15:25,470 --> 00:15:28,000 So a full diagnosis is not made. 161 00:15:29,030 --> 00:15:29,530 Third, 162 00:15:29,530 --> 00:15:41,950 there will be individuals who receive feedback that there are things obscuring any kind of pattern and figuring out how to untangle these things may really actually be impossible. 163 00:15:43,060 --> 00:15:43,900 Lastly, 164 00:15:43,900 --> 00:15:50,190 about 2% of individuals will receive the feedback that they meet full criteria for autism. 165 00:15:51,170 --> 00:15:57,850 Whatever the conclusions are, dedication toward including neurology in the assessment process, 166 00:15:57,860 --> 00:15:58,900 for example, 167 00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:09,220 including autism in the differential ... it can add to the self awareness that clients receive and awareness is key to well-being and growth. 168 00:16:10,590 --> 00:16:23,270 I thank you for joining me for this series on misdiagnosis, those times when people receive a diagnosis that's describing one little element of their presentation, 169 00:16:23,270 --> 00:16:25,160 but not their whole experience. 170 00:16:25,170 --> 00:16:29,040 And autism is one of those big picture diagnoses. 171 00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:32,420 Thanks again for listening, 172 00:16:32,420 --> 00:16:34,490 and I hope you join me next time.      

Join Dr. Regan for the third in this series on autism misdiagnosis. This episode focuses on the misdiagnosis of mood conditions for the autistic individual. Specifically bipolar disorder and depression are reviewed.   Exhaustion in Autism: Balancing Momentum for Daily Activities Recognizing Dysregulation on the Autism Spectrum: Fight, Flight, Freeze Dr. Regan's Resources New Course for Clinicians - Interventions in Autism: Helping Clients Stay Centered, Connect with Others, and Engage in Life New Course for Clinicians: ASD Differential Diagnoses and Associated Characteristics Book: Understanding Autism in Adults and Aging Adults, 2nd ed Audiobook Book: Understanding Autistic Behaviors Autism in the Adult website homepage Website Resources for Clinicians  

Dr. K covers what to know about the new Omicron booster for fall, upcoming variants on the horizon, the data on who remains at risk for dying from COVID, and what she thinks people should expect for the fall. The post 130 COVID Booster Update for Aging Adults (9.7.22 Edition) appeared first on Better Health While Aging.