Yuliana Kim-Grant's Phoenix Tales

Honoring the Fragility of Life with Jimin HanToday Yuliana is joined by Jimin Han, the author of the novel, A Small Revolution. Born in Seoul, Korea, Jimin grew up in the United States, eventually attending Cornell University and earning an MFA from Sarah Lawrence College. Her writing can be found in a number of publications, and A Small Revolution, her first novel, has appeared on many ‘Best Fiction' and ‘Must Reads' lists. Jimin currently teaches at The Writing Institute at Sarah Lawrence College and Pace University, and today she takes us on the journey of how the passing of her mother left her heartbroken but still gave her strength to continue writing.Jimin begins by delving into the event that redirected the course of her life - her mother's passing, how that event strongly affected her, and the further strain it put on her relationship with her father. She discusses how she channels rage and becomes more protective of her energy and space as a writer, and describes the way that realizing how fragile life can be makes us slow down to catch our breath. The episode rounds off as Jimin talks about playing the piano, be it Beethoven or ABCs, and how it resonates with her life. Having learned just how very precious each and every day is in our lives, Jimin has gained much wisdom which she shares with listeners here today. Episode Highlights:The event that redirected the course of Jimin's life - her mother's passingStepping into our own after a parent's deathHow rage made Jimin more protectiveThe concessions Jimin madeHow a sense of mortality affects our decisionsJimin's second bookNavigating a strained relationship with a parentThe preciousness of time and how it makes us slow downGetting comfortable in a certain amount of discomfortPlaying the piano Quotes:“As writers, we want to make complex characters, we want to live in the nuances of feeling.”“As writers, we need to be more protective of our time and our sort of emotional and mental space.”“I feel that a lot of the lessons that she was able to teach me, I feel that I still carry her with me.”“What...I want my children to learn from me, and what I wanted them to be able to say is ‘Yes, my mother did write the book she wanted to write.'”“I wish I'd recorded her. I wish I had been able to stay up and listen to everything else she wanted to say. I look back and I wish I'd been able to spend those moments.”“Every day is so precious.”“How is it that we just assume life is just going to go on? And yet we have to make plans. That's the best way to live is to make those plans.”“I didn't give myself that breathing space and now, I try to schedule a few big things a week, as opposed to, in a day. Maybe a few things in a month as opposed to a week...just not forcing yourself.”“I've just learned that if I wait a little longer, then the answer comes."“I think what it taught me ...that... for many years...and I will just speak for myself that I had made a lot of concessions and I feel that after my mother died I was able to see more clearly how I should be more protective. As writers we become more protective of our time, sort of emotional and mental space. All of that has become more clear to me.“Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on Spotify

Welcome to the Phoenix Tales PodcastShow Notes: Welcome to the premier podcast episode of Phoenix Tales, a show about women overcoming challenges in their lives, and, like the Phoenix, being reborn with their lives reimagined. Joining our host, Yuliana Kim-Grant, this week is Ginger McKnight-Chavers, author of In the Heart of Texas. A graduate of Georgetown's School of Foreign Service and Harvard Law School, Ginger was a practicing lawyer when challenges in her personal life inspired her to pursue another course, resulting in her own Phoenix Tale which she shares with listeners here today.Ginger begins the conversation by describing those challenges which she faced, the traits she possessed which kept her moving forward through them, and how she came to possess them. She goes on to describe the insecurities she faced in her career as a woman of color, her feelings of being an imposter and the impact this had, her advice for empty nesters on re-engaging with the world, and giving yourself permission to pursue your passion. The episode concludes with Ginger sharing the song that she feels best describes her life. Eloquent, insightful, engaging, and thoroughly inspirational, Ginger and her tale of remaking her life provide the perfect foundation and springboard for what you can expect to hear in upcoming episodes of the Phoenix Tales podcast.Episode Highlights:The challenges that redirected the course of Ginger's lifeThe traits that kept Ginger moving forward through her challenges and how she came to possess themThe insecurities she faced in her career as a woman of colorHer feelings of being an imposter and the impact upon herGinger's advice for empty nesting listeners to re-engage with the worldGiving yourself permission to pursue or reignite a passionThe one song that describes Ginger's lifeQuotes:“I stopped seeing myself as an attorney who just liked to write in my spare time to taking writing seriously, and it transformed my life.”“I'm the kind of person that thinks about things and analyzes them before I react for better and for worse.”“I just became this sort of serial kind of multitask or tunnel vision kind of machine.” “As a writer, you know, I think most of us feel like an imposter.”“You belong there, but there's just a little something going on underneath the surface.”“You're watching the world in order to navigate it because you feel like you're not one of those people that just waltzes down the red carpet.”“You're always on the lookout for a situation that could be harmful or dangerous.”“Am I at the in-law's house or in my family home? Just that undercurrent of you're never sure when someone's going to push you out the door.”“It is a blessing to have really supportive and grounded parents and grandparents that were very active in your life.”“Black women are the biggest demographic of readers in America.”“I went with a small press, I hired my own publicist. I had already plotted out what I wanted to do, and who I wanted to...

Expressing the Fullness of Who You Are with Kim ThaiJoining our host, Yuliana Kim-Grant, this week is Kim Thai, an Emmy-award-winning producer, writer, activist, and mindfulness teacher. She is the founder of GaneshSpace, a community organization dedicated to creating spaces to dismantle internalized oppression and explore identity through the lens of intersectionality. Kim shares her Phoenix Tale today of how she rediscovered herself after her divorce.Kim begins the conversation by sharing the event that redirected the course of her life: her divorce. She talks about experiencing heartbreak and turning to yoga at the time and how this event set her on a path of discovering her life and finding independence. In this self-discovery, Kim found herself exploring her sexuality and embracing her queerness. She discusses the challenges of being the only person of color in a room and how her life experiences have made her create impacts geared towards encouraging diversity. She also talks about unlearning the generational trauma passed on to her from her parents' experiences as refugees. The episode concludes with Kim talking about Ganesh and sharing the one song that describes her life- a song about acceptance and stepping into the world and knowing you're enough.Episode Highlights:The event that redirected the course of Kim's lifeExperiencing heartbreak in divorceFinding yoga in a time of needHow Kim embarked on a journey of independence and self-discoveryKim's exploration of her sexualityWhat does queer mean now? - Kim's pieceThe challenges of growing up as an Asian American in TexasObserving from a distance as one different from othersGenerational trauma- staying in survival modeMigrating to TexasKim talks about GaneshThe one song that describes Kim's life.Quotes:“It was a very interesting time for me in the next couple years to be able to really kind of find myself and find the parts of me that still needed to be woken up when to be discovered.”“We both had that sort of mindset that we were each other's person.”“We kind of grew into different people than we were when we first met at 17. ”“It was a lot of deep diving of getting reacquainted to the core of who I was.”“I didn't have to necessarily completely understand who or why I was attracted to someone and or have to identify, but it was more just me being open to it. And that was really the practice for me at that point.”“I don't want to be put into a box, I don't like want to have to restrain my identity in any way, whether it's my sexual identity, or my racial identity, my gender, whenever in order to fit a system that may or may not be able to really let me express the fullness of who I am.”“My boundary has become a lot more clear. And I'm a lot more strong at holding it with when it comes to discussions about race”“I'm Asian all the time!”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales on FacebookKim's HomepageGaneshSpace...

Love, Pain, Grief, and Learning How to Overcome with Cat PartheniadesOn this week's episode, Yuliana welcomes Catherine ‘Cat' Partheniades to the show to talk about the moment she found out she was adopted. She was 30 when this happened, and shortly after this discovery, both of her adoptive parents passed away. Today she chats with Yuliana about reckoning with her parents' lies, experiencing resentment, and her intense periods of drinking to repress the emotions she didn't know how to deal with or even want to deal with. It was only upon finding her biological family that she found solace in her identity and her parents' decision to withhold information from her.After coming into contact with her birth mother through Facebook, Cat remembers meeting her in Brazil as a blissful moment where she finally found the missing piece that she hadn't quite been able to place in her life before. Kim and our guest go on to talk about both Cat's birth and adoptive parents, and the pair close out the episode by talking about her experience healing from grief and complex emotions. It's certainly been an interesting ride for Cat Partheniades, but, as you will hear, she doesn't want this narrative to dominate her life. After all, she is so much more than that.Episode Highlights:Cat finding out she was adopted at 30 Her parents' liesExperiencing resentment toward her parents Setting pain asideFeeling like she's betraying her parents Finding her biological family through FacebookThe quest for Charlotte's birth momReunification with Charlotte's biological familyCharlotte's coming outIdentity strugglesHealing from griefEd Sheeran's PhotographQuotes:“Facing the health challenges of both her parents, she finds out that she's adopted, even amid the pain of losing her parents and this life altering discovery, she finds a way toward acceptance of her life and more importantly, herself.”“I did get into contact with my biological family, and at that point in time, I finally felt that I was at home with myself— with the universe in a sense - because when I met my biological family, that's where I belong, in a sense. It has nothing to do with the adoptive side not loving me or anything like that.”“I knew that because growing up, my father was Greek, my mother was Brazilian. And the story that they told me was, they tried to have a baby for like, 16 years, and I was the miracle baby. And instead of having me here in the States, where my mom had no family, they decided to take my mom to Brazil to be around family.”“I think initially, I was so overwhelmed with knowing that I was going to lose my parents, then eventually dealing with grief. I wish I didn't have to deal with the adoption part of my life. I found it to be very overwhelming, to be very honest. I did a great job in hiding those feelings from people.”“When you look at the bigger picture, how can I be mad at people that wanted to love me and protect me so hard? That's what I kind of started to learn and that's what gave me peace with everything.”The moment I saw my bio mom, I knew it was her. How did that feel? “Oh my god, I felt like I was floating. I felt like I wanted to throw up and cry. It was just so overwhelming, but it was so beautiful. My wife got to witness all the emotions all at once where she told me the story. She told me that everyone in the family knew about me. And she also told me that she's been waiting for me for 33 years to contact her because when she gave me away for adoption, she left me with a letter. When I wanted to, I could contact her, but my family never gave me that letter. Thank God for Facebook. ”“Thankfully, they're both really great people, both sides of my bio family are amazing and

Finding Peace and Purpose in a Journey through Healing with Dana HellerHolistic self-care specialist Dana Heller joins Yuliana today to share her inspiring story with listeners. From the life changing doctor's visit where she found out she had a brain tumour, to her experiences going through multiple surgeries, Dana has come out the other side to help others going through what she did and helping them to feel empowered and healthy once again.The conversation begins with Dana talking about the event that changed the course of her life - finding out she had a pituitary tumor. She goes on to describe her experience after the first surgery and radiation treatment, the emotions she dealt with knowing she was battling something chronic, and finding meditation and yoga in tough times even when she was let go at work. Dana also details the impact the illness had on her relationships with her parents and how she continues to share her journey and help others that are in the beginning stages of their diagnosis. The episode concludes with Dana sharing the one song that describes her life, ‘Don't Worry, Be Happy', which reinforces her belief that ‘life is too short to just be average and not happy'.Episode Highlights:The challenging event that redirected the course of Dana's lifeDana's experience after the first surgeryThe importance of the growth hormoneFinding the silver lining in tough timesSeeking solace in helping othersNavigating the relationships with friends and family.Dealing with health and careerGoing through the tough daysThe one song that best describes Dana's life Quotes:“I think when I found out that I had to have the second surgery, that was when they kind of hit me, the doors came open, and the feelings that I didn't feel at the beginning of it all came out.”“Trying to find acceptance and surrender on some days is easier than others.”“I've been through this journey to hopefully be able to help somebody else that is in the beginning stages of whatever's going on.”“There's something beyond strength to be able to face that and face it in a way where you then just start to live your life managing this part of your life, and not letting it become the whole of your life.”“Life is too short. And I just want to be happy. Worrying does nothing for me, whatever has happened in the past has happened, and worrying about the past or worrying about the future, and then you're not in the present.”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales on FacebookDana Heller.ComDana's Instagram

Thriving After Illness with Dr. Susan LovelleFunctional medicine practitioner, Dr. Susan Lovelle, joins Yuliana today for a truly fascinating conversation. Currently the Founder and CEO of Premiere Wellness, Dr. Susan spent 14 years as a professional ballet dancer after which she became a physician specializing in plastic surgery. In her current role with Premiere Wellness, she is thrilled to now be supporting women to heal from the inside out. In this week's episode, she shares her tale of how she made life changes and regained control of her health after landing in the hospital multiple times, and how these events propelled her into finding a new purpose in helping others and making a difference in their lives.Dr. Susan begins by recounting the event that redirected the course of her life - an illness that landed her in the intensive care unit three times. She then talks about her experience as the only plastic surgeon for miles and miles where she lived, how this took a toll on her health, and her subsequent commitment to make dietary changes and practice yoga. Dr. Susan also delves into the health disparity found in African American communities and how she started a functional medicine practice to help others achieve wellness in a holistic manner. The episode rounds off with her advice regarding how to make changes in your life - listen, let go, and live. As Dr. Susan states, the song “I am not Finished” resonates with her life, a fact that is made abundantly clear through her courageous and inspiring phoenix tale here today.Episode Highlights:The challenging event that redirected the course of Dr. Susan's lifeDr. Susan's experience as a plastic surgeonFinding herself in intensive careMaking changes after a relapseTransitioning from plastic surgery to functional medicineExploring the health disparity in the African American communityStarting a functional medicine practiceSteps to mastering your energy at any ageHow to go about making a change in your lifeThe one song that resonates with Dr, Susan's lifeQuotes:“I pushed myself to where I ended up in the intensive care unit three times in the space of one year.”“It's time to stop believing that I can do everything and be everything to everyone. It was time to start taking care of myself.”“When I first decided I wanted to go into medicine, it was because I wanted to make a difference in people's lives, and I just realized that, you know, I can make a better difference long term by doing functional medicine.”“Food is a very important part of the culture of African Americans.”“Listen, let go, and live.”“Sometimes … you realize that this is not right for you at this particular point, that you might need to let go a little so that you can then reach out for something that's better. ”“Whatever it is that floats your boat, that makes and brings joy into your life, is what you need to be doing, especially at this stage in life.”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales on FacebookPremiere Wellness Homepage

Embracing and Preserving Democratic Values with Tzveta RaynovaThis week, Yuliana is joined by Tzveta Raynova, a media executive in New York City and former international student from Bulgaria, who shares her journey of overcoming the difficulties of obtaining a student visa in the US, especially after the events of September 11th. Tzveta highlights the complexities of immigration policies and the difficulties faced by foreign students, and recounts how, despite these challenges, she was able to succeed and become a proud US citizen who is fiercely committed to democracy.In this thought-provoking conversation, she and Yulaina discuss their fears and concerns about the erosion of democratic values and the possibility of authoritarianism in the US. Tzveta shares her personal experiences growing up in an authoritarian country and how it has shaped her views on freedom and democracy. She reflects on her journey through business school during the Great Recession and facing unemployment, before delving deeper into the current state of the country, discussing how changing rules surrounding elections are making it harder for people to make their voices heard. Drawing upon their shared experience of the impact that uncertainty and fear have had on their lives, Yuliana and Tzveta underscore the importance of preserving democratic values for future generations - a powerful and timely message for us all to heed.Episode Highlights:Tzveta's experience as an international student in the US and the challenges she facedThe impact of September 11th on her personal and professional lifeThe complexities of immigration policies and how they can affect international studentsTzveta's journey to becoming a US citizenHer commitment to defending the values and ideals of democracyExperiences, fears and concerns with authoritarianismImportance of democracy and freedomReflections on life experiences and uncertaintyConcerns about the future and the erosion of democratic valuesThe song that aligns with Tzveta's vision of the worldQuotes:"I came to the US for college originally from Bulgaria, and as an international student, you're governed by your student visa and what that permits you to do once you graduate.""Literally ten days after my internship wrapped, 9/11 happened.""I know how the world changed after that terrible day.""I've heard stories from friends who are of Middle East descent all of a sudden getting pulled out of security lines, airports, getting asked questions.""What terrifies me is being ruled by an authoritarian leader.""The elections during those Communist times were just perfunctory functions. They were not real.""One of the beautiful things about this country and democracy in this country is that people can organize and make their voice heard and that elections matter.""And if the rules of how elections are run are changed so that regardless of what the people want, their chosen elected officials don't actually end up taking office, then we are in really dangerous territory."“Don't stand on the sidelines. Get involved. At the minimum, make sure you vote, if you can.”“‘Vivir Mi Vida', which means ‘live my life'... is a song that I love listening to overall because it's kind of a song that you listen to both in good times and in bad, and it reminds you to keep staying in the present, focusing on the positive - that all sort of the painful moments or difficult moments will pass.”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on...

Lifting Yourself Up and Starting All Over Again with Hourig MesserlianOn the show today, Hourig Messerlian, Senior Director of IT Business at Computing and Information Services - The City University of New York, joins Yuliana to tell her remarkable and truly inspiring story of how she got to where she is today. Starting with how she fled a country ravaged by Civil War, crossing continents and countries, facing many life altering changes along the way, Hourig now finds herself living an incredibly successful life far from the rubble of a country destroyed by war. She goes far beyond simply surviving, and proves herself to be one who thrives wherever life takes her, defying all odds with her unstoppable spirit and steadfast resolve to never give up.In this fascinating conversation, Hourig delves into the challenging event that shaped her life - a story of fleeing Lebanon during the civil war at 19 to start a new life, how she was brought up in Lebanon and how she met her father for the first time in London where she started this new life. She shares details about moving to New York, going back to college for a degree, despite being in her mid-40s, and shares with us a special memory that she always looks forward to amidst the storm. The episode draws to a close with Hourig's advice to those who seek to make big changes, and the one song that she feels resonates with her life - a song about hope. As Hourig movingly states, life has made her “someone who decided a long time ago not to take things sitting down and crying her eyes out” – listen in today to hear about this amazing life and the lessons it teaches us all.Episode Highlights:The challenging event that redirected the course of Hourig's LifeHow Hourig, an Armenian, was brought up in LebanonThe life of an outsider who isn't afraid to start all over againAlone during the Lebanese Civil WarLeaving Lebanon in perilous timesHourig meeting her father for the first timeSettling into a new life in LondonHer move to New YorkWhy getting a college degree was importantHow Hourig propels forward amidst challengesThe most difficult chapter in Hourig's lifeA memory that holds a special place in Hourig's heartAn inner sense of lonelinessHourig's advice to those who have to make big changesThe one song that describes Hourig's lifeQuotes:“It gives one a different outlook in life that nothing is permanent, that tomorrow, who knows, I may have to start all over again. ”“I'm Armenian, if you crush me, I will lift myself up and start all over again.”“There was definitely a second side to my life and my story.”“I'm a very stubborn person, and I don't take to failure too well, or bad luck, or whatever you want to call it. I decided to stay.”“I strongly believe that there's always going to be a window open if a door closes.”“I consider myself lucky that not only do I push myself back up and try again, but I always find a way out of whatever disaster I'm faced with.”“When something's behind me, I leave it behind me. I have almost always succeeded in not having any more concerns, not looking back.”“Go for it, do it, start your life over and over again if you want, if it makes you happy, if it gives you what you're looking for all these years.” Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on Spotify

Life Lessons Learned through Immense Loss with Judy GlassmanHow does the death of a parent redirect the course of one's life? Judy Glassman joins Yuliana on today's episode as she recounts the painful experience of losing her mother to brain cancer, the joy of finding yoga, and transitioning into a new career at a later age for a meaningful life.Judy begins the conversation by describing the challenging event that reshaped her life - losing her mother to brain cancer rapidly and having to bear that weight solely. She goes on to discuss how she coped by compartmentalizing and finding time to remind herself to breathe, finding peace in yoga, and starting a career in yoga therapy even at a later age. As is the tradition on Phoenix Tales, our guest closes out this moving and inspirational episode by describing the song that most resonates with her life.Episode Highlights:The challenging event that redirected the course of Judy's lifeBearing the weight of it allCoping by compartmentalizingThe complicated process of grieving as the main caretakerHow Judy's independence helped her through her mom's deathSeeking healing in yogaWhat is yoga therapy?Starting a new career at a later agePlanning for the futureThe one song that resonates with Judy's lifeQuotes:“For 10 minutes every morning, I allowed myself to do nothing and stare out the window and breathe.”“During that time, I simply was the caretaker with my own ball of emotions .”“No matter how young or old you are, a parent's death follows you and gets more difficult as you get older rather than less difficult."“I was my mother's first priority. And that changed.”“I ultimately, really, completely healed myself with yoga.”“We get to focus on a person's challenges and not see them as anything negative, but just to be able to give them the power, and help heal them through these modalities.”“I am careful about my own practice so that I don't overdo it.”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales on FacebookJudy Glassman YogaEmail Judy

Rising Above Life's Challenges to Follow a New Passion with Kathy CaseyKathy Casey sits down with Yuliana today to share her own phoenix tale of how she reinvented herself and followed her passion after losing a part of herself to her divorce and forced retirement. Both of these life events naturally had significant impacts upon Kathy and the path her life was following, Through courage and compassion, Kathy overcame these obstacles and today shares how this has fueled her to become the woman she is today.Kathy begins the conversation by talking about her divorce as one of the events that reshaped her life, from meeting her ex-husband and enjoying a whirlwind romance in Italy to how she had to face some realizations after the divorce. She also discusses the other event that shaped her life - her forced retirement at 56 - and realizing that she based her identity heavily on her profession. She then delves into finding and following a new passion and how she plans to settle upon retirement. The episode ends with Kathy talking about the one song that resonates with her life, a song about gratitude and compassion. Episode Highlights:The challenging events that redirected the course of Kathy's lifeQuestioning her judgment after making a life-changing decisionFalling in love with a man and a cityExperiencing the impacts of forced retirementThe realizations after her divorceHow Kathy defined herself by a job and titleFollowing a new passionSettling after retirementHaving compassion for yourself and othersOne song that resonates with Kathy's life Quotes:“I was walking in a coma through my own life.”“It was a difficult marriage and a difficult divorce, but I think both did set me up for what I would become in later life.”“All my life my professional work was anchored in writing, but I was always kind of a pen for hire. And now I finally I'm writing for myself.”“One of the things that I feel like I've learned, and I'm continuing to try to learn in my work with animals and animal organizations, is compassion.”“A lot of us have difficulty showing ourselves compassion.”“Sometimes when you don't know where to turn, or which way to move, the only thing to do is just to stay out in the world.”“I do have a tendency to isolate like a wounded animal. I'll lick my boots in the corner... When I lost my job, not really knowing what to do next, I just stayed in contact. Just stay out in the world and something will drop into your lap.” Links:Phoenix Tales Homepage Phoenix Tales on Instagram Phoenix Tales on Spotify Phoenix Tales on Facebook Kathy's Blog

Starting Life Over with Ellen GreenbergToday's guest is Ellen Greenberg. a designer and the owner and director of Quick Culture, a global, art tour and cultural travel company. Among her other roles, Ellen has also been an instructor at the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising, has guest lectured at UCLA, holds Docent Program certificates at both The Getty Center and LACMA, and is the author of Inside Chocolate, a pictorial art book. In this moving episode, she shares her phoenix tale of how she realized she was meant to be more than just a wife and a mother, and how that became a catalyst for her divorce. Notwithstanding, Ellen never quit and her incredible story here today is one that is sure to inspire and motivate.She begins by discussing her first divorce as the challenging event that reshaped her life. As a result of this brutal and difficult split in the midst of the 1970s Women's Movement, Ellen picked up her life post-divorce and moved 3000 miles to LA to start over. She discusses being a single mother before remarrying, which brought its own struggles, as well as her second divorce. She talks about the self-doubt she experienced and why she decided never to make one thing the most important in her life. An avid fan of Mark Twain, Ellen finishes by sharing that she would like to have a sit down with him to ask him questions about his works.Episode Highlights:The challenging event that redirected the course of Ellen's lifeEllen's difficult divorceMoving to LA and starting a new jobThe emotional impact of the divorce on Ellen's kidsEllen's challenges in her new marriage and second divorceBattling self-doubtA sit-down with Mark TwainQuotes:“That was the worst thing I ever went through. He didn't want the marriage to end. He tried to do everything nasty...even to the point of saying that he was going to commit suicide if I left him.”“I was driven, wanting to succeed.”“I finally came to the conclusion that I didn't pick them. They picked me and I agreed.”“I was never going to let one thing be the most important thing in my life.”“Don't make anything that important.”“I'm not Superwoman. I'm only human. And I don't know, I do the best I can.”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales on FacebookQuick Culture

Guided by Something Greater than Yourself with Rhonda PowellIn this episode of Phoenix Tales, Yuliana has the pleasure of interviewing Rhonda Powell, a leading attorney in the media landscape who has faced not one but two health crises that nearly took her life. As you will hear today, through these challenges Rhonda has emerged with a deeper focus on what is truly important in her life and she continues to be an inspiration to all.Rhonda shares her story of a condition called placenta accreta and the severe hemorrhaging she faced after giving birth to her youngest child. Despite being monitored closely, the event nearly took her life and the subsequent development of a pulmonary embolism only added to her trauma. However, from these struggles, Rhonda learned the importance of focusing on what truly matters in her life and making sure she stays on course, despite the obstacles that may come her way. She also reflects on the impact of her near-death experiences on her beliefs and sense of self. She explains how it has enhanced her sense of certainty in herself and her decisions, made her value time even more, and encouraged her to bond more fully with her children. Rhonda discusses her belief that her life is guided by something greater than herself and how this belief has provided a sense of hope and comfort in moments of darkness. Her words of wisdom, as shared here today, serve as testament to the power of faith and how it can help us persevere through even the most difficult of times and seemingly insurmountable challenges.Episode Highlights:Rhonda's health crisesThe significance of these events in Rhonda's life and how they have changed her.Managing life with a newborn and two other young children.Coming out of the hospital and the healing process.Rhonda's sense of certaintyValuing time and bonding with childrenBeing guided by something greater than herselfThe role of faith in providing comfort in moments of darknessThe importance of cultivating a relationship where children feel comfortable sharingBeing a lifelong companion for their childrenThe songs that resonate with Rhonda these daysQuotes:"And I really do believe that that experience changed the way that I viewed my life, changed the way that I viewed my family, and changed the way that I move forward in the world.""It just really crystallized the things and the people that are really important to you.""Keep yourself focused on the things that really matter to you and that you really value and care about.""I always had this very clear sense of my own process, my own conclusions, and just taking the road that I felt I should take.""Having the self-confidence and the trust that no one's going to know what's best for you better than you.""Let's make sure that you're pouring everything into these kids that you can pour in so that they know their mom.""My kids are really comfortable with me, and they feel like they can say anything to me without feeling judgment, without fear.""There is something greater than yourself guiding your life."“Maybe it's just about the moment that we're in right now as well, but I listen to Beyonce's ‘Freedom' a lot. I feel like it's a song that propels you forward, so I listen to that quite a bit. And I also listen to Nina Simone's ‘Feeling Good' quite a lot.”Links: Phoenix Tales Homepage Phoenix Tales on Instagram

Emerging from Challenges with Courage and Resilience with Roni JacksonRoni Jackson, Co-Founder of Red Flag Mania, joins Yuliana today to share her inspiring phoenix tale. Roni identifies and expands upon two inflection points in her life that altered her trajectory considerably. The first, losing her mother at a young age, and the second, being forced to give up her long time career, both had significant impacts upon her life, helping to shape her and become the resilient and courageous phoenix she is today.Roni begins by discussing these events that redirected the course of her life, describing the loneliness and isolation she felt growing up in a new household after she lost her mom and how that influenced the way she raised her own children. Regarding her second challenging event, being let go from a company to which she had devoted a huge part of her life, Roni talks about starting a new career and how she had become a resilient force ever since the death of her mom. She also details how she created a strong family unit in a bid to dispel that fear of loneliness and isolation which she carried into adulthood. The episode comes to a close with Roni sharing the one song that truly resonates with her life - a song about finding her space and happy place in this vast world. Finding courage and resilience from not only one, but two pivotal moments in her life, Roni's phoenix tale here today is one that you will not soon forget. Episode Highlights:- The challenging events that redirected the course of Roni's life- Life after her mother's passing- How losing her mother impacted the raising of Roni's children- The end to a 10-year career- Starting out on a new path- The resiliency from losing one's parent at a young age- Carrying fears in adulthood- Creating a strong nuclear family unit- Experiencing a fear of mortality- A great gift born out of love- One song that resonates with Roni's life Quotes:“Being a motherless daughter is a very challenging place to be. Particularly as you begin your teenage years, you are left without anyone understanding exactly who you are.” “Not having my mother truly impacted who I am and how I think and even, I think, my devotion to my own children.” “I had given so much to a company that had given me so little. And not only that, but I think I defined myself by the company, and by what I was doing.” “Resiliency is certainly a part of the fabric of my being.” “The problem was I gave a job half of myself. ” “I learned that I have to prioritize what is most important to me, and always put that at the forefront.” Links: Phoenix Tales Homepage Phoenix Tales on Instagram Phoenix Tales on Spotify Phoenix Tales on Facebook Red Flag Mania

Today on the show, Yuliana is joined by Ji Young, the founder of the Tide Film Festival. An attorney turned non-profit executive, producer, writer, speaker and facilitator, Ji is the Founder of DreamMaker DreamDoer DreamSupporter, inc, - 3D, and is the creator, producer and host of the web series ‘Not Your Average' for KoreanAmericanstory.org. as well as the founder, co-creator, former co-producer and current advisor to ‘$6.99 Per Pound' podcast. At the age of 3, Ji was adopted from Korea by an Italian and Irish-American family, grew up in upstate New York, and today shares the story of her adoption, the battle with her identity, and the impact of reuniting with her Korean birth family.Ji begins the conversation by talking about her adoption as the one event that shaped her life's direction, her childhood growing up as an Asian-American in New York, and how it took 10 years for her to brace herself to meet her birth family after having found them. She goes on to describe meeting them and the emotions that surfaced, the moment she truly understood the rationale behind her birth mother's decision, and when she truly forgave her. Ji also delves into how the sense of abandonment impacted her relationships and how she and her husband work to make sure their children feel confident, proud, and love themselves. The episode rounds off with Ji talking about Tide and the one song that describes her life - a super sad song about resilience. A model of resiliency herself, Ji and her story of meeting and overcoming challenges will undoubtedly move and inspire all who listen in today. Episode Highlights:- The event that redirected the course of Ji Young's life- Growing up as an adopted child in New York- Why parents should help their children learn about their culture and identity- Seeking out her birth family - Ji's story- The week Ji met her birth family- The reason why giving Ji up for adoption was necessary- The moment of true forgiveness- The journey of Ji's identity- Dealing with the sense of abandonment- Raising mixed children- Ji speaks about her film festival, Tide- The one song that describes Ji's life Quotes:“The biggest part of my identity that shapes me the most is the adoptee part of my identity.”“I didn't have the maturity or the self-awareness or the grasp on identity enough to understand just how difficult it was for me.”“You should do what you can to help your child feel good about their identity, whether it's black, Asian, brown, whatever it is.”“A lot of people think of it as ‘Oh, you find them and ta-da it's done', when really, it's just the beginning of a pretty difficult journey.” “I have twins. When they were turning three, the age that I was when I was adopted, I would stay up nights just bawling my eyes out being, like, ‘I cannot imagine putting my child on a plane right now.'”“This was the first time I was able to realize that before my story was my mom's story and whatever brought her to that point where she had to make this awful decision, I was finally able to have empathy for that.”“This was my fate in this lifetime.”“Because there is this innate fear of abandonment that we kind of have to struggle with our entire lives, I can see, when I'm being objectively self-reflective enough, how that plays out in my relationships, and not just romantic relationships in the past, but all relationships.”“My mission in life since I was pregnant with my children has been to make sure they feel good about the skin that they're in, to feel good about themselves, to feel confident and proud, and to love themselves.” Links:

Today, Yuliana introduces Gabriella Barnstone, a certified yoga therapist, and together they talk about the pivotal moment that redirected the course of Gabriella's life. For her, it was her father's mental illness and eventual suicide that changed everything. As she says, everything in her life was leading up to that moment of the untimely death by suicide of her parent. She reflects on these heart-breaking moments and opens up about her family history of mental illness. She also shares her story of dealing with trauma and accepting the fact that healing is a lifelong process.Next, Gabriella gets into the details of her family history of mental illnesses. Looking back on the most tragic family events, she tells us about the impact of bipolar disorder on an individual's life. Not only does mental illness impact a person's life, but it also touches everything and everyone around them. Unfortunately, that was also the case with Gabriella's father. His mental health struggles left a mark on those that loved him but also shaped them to become stronger and more resilient. To this day, Gabriella continues to unpack her trauma and complex emotions as she helps others heal and recover using yoga as therapy. She's truly an inspiration to everyone dealing with grief, loss, and sorrow.Episode Highlights:Coping with tragic events and complicated family history The impact of bipolar disorder on a person's personal and professional lifeThe effects of suicide on family membersUnderstanding mental illness in familySelf-healingThe lifelong process of processing traumaThe songs that most resonate with GabriellaQuotes:“There's this other side of my personality, maybe you've seen it, Yuliana, that was bold, and just go for things, and just really try to carve out my own way and take chances. I think that comes from that too. Those kinds of situations that are scary really make you adaptable in some ways.”“Up until then, I was like, why are people mean? And why are they mean to me? And then when I read that letter, I was like, no, wait, people who are mean are in pain.”“The next phone call I got was from my cousin. He said, ‘Gabby, I just want you to know that there's nothing you could have done.' I thought that was like the most generous thing that anyone could do. Because he knew where the mind goes. Because he had been through it.”“I feel like even today, things will come up. I feel like it's a lifelong process of unpacking, it's so huge that there's no sort of processing it, and then be done with it.”“I would say that things change. I don't think I would say, ‘You're going to be okay,' anything like that. I would say ‘Just know that now is not what you're always going to be feeling.'”“So one is Iggy Pop ‘Passenger', which is a song that I love because it's just about experiencing life. That's what it is to me. I like the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' ‘Despair', do you know that song? Because it's all about sort of, like, facing despair and sort of, like, concreteness. That bluegrass song. ‘Keep on the Sunny Side', which by the way, is not what it sounds like. It doesn't mean like, just be happy all the time. There's something about it that suggests, like, effort, you know?”Links:Phoenix Tales HomepagePhoenix Tales on InstagramPhoenix Tales on SpotifyPhoenix Tales

This week on the Phoenix Tales podcast, Yuliana welcomes Helen Dellheim, a former attorney of law and currently a real estate executive. After going through the untimely death of her mother, nothing was ever the same for Helen. Although tragic, this event turned out to be a pivotal turning point in her life, giving her the courage to make dramatic changes and grow through these pivotal moments on both a professional and personal level. Helen talks about the disastrous effects that parental death can have on an individual. She recounts her experience of feeling grief while being a new mom and dealing with a broken marriage. Although it wasn't easy, Helen was able to turn her life around and rise out of the ashes. She tells us all about these hard-learned lessons, from finding the courage to part ways with her ex-husband to learning how to color outside the lines. Finally, Helen opens up about her decision to make a career switch and adds that her mother's death taught her to live every day like it's her last. Not only did she start living her life to the fullest career-wise, she also became a powerful and loving role model for her children. Episode Highlights: Dealing with parental death   The importance of allowing yourself to feel grief Appearance vs reality of a happy couple Growing through pivotal moments in life Making a big career switch and coloring outside the lines Living every day like it's your last The song that resonates most with Helen Quotes: “Our friends are always like, ‘Oh, you guys are such a perfect couple. You always look so happy.' Well, hello, looks are deceiving. And inside the marriage, there's a lot going on that's not spoken.” “Definitely not feeling like someone's always going to judge or kind of wants to steer you one way is completely liberating in that you can make your own mistakes and no one's going to say, ‘Oh, I told you so.'” “I have lived, like people say, live each day like it's your last. I have done that since she passed. Because I think it's very important, because we really don't know when our time is. So, whenever it is, I'm hoping that I've given my sons enough skills and understanding that, yeah, it'll be okay.” “Long time ago, my sister said that happiness is a choice, and I got so mad at her. I was like, that is not true. Well, you know, there is some truth to it, if there is a truth in that the brain, it can be rewired. It takes effort, it takes lots of hours of probably internal work, but I do believe it's possible.” “If it were my time tomorrow, it's okay because I feel everyday fulfilling that mission, that's my life.” “It's the music, and feeling like I am the ‘Dancing Queen' because I am. I love music and I love to dance.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/helendellheim/ (Helen Dellheim on LinkedIn) https://www.instagram.com/helendellheim/ (Helen Dellheim on Instagram) https://www.facebook.com/hdellheim (Helen Dellheim on Facebook)

On today's episode, Yuliana welcomes Penni Feiner to the podcast to talk about her brother's entry into inpatient drug rehab, why it forced her to confront her own cocaine addiction, how she has managed to stay 25 years sober, and why yoga and mindfulness helped save her.  As  a lifelong feminist, executive director, and yoga enthusiast, Feiner has come a long way way since that young girl who stumbled in to free basing all those years ago.  It wasn't until after her brother, who also suffered from addiction, reached out for help and joined an inpatient rehab program that she even acknowledged that she had a problem.   She notes that, during this time, she turned to mindfulness, yoga, and meditation.  And, in that process, she's become her own best friend for the first time in her life.  Feiner's learned throughout her journey that, while addiction never goes away, her coping mechanisms allow her to at least sit with the intense emotions that accompany it.  Penni recognizes that anxiety and stress are going to be parts of her daily experience and is no longer surprised about their presence.  That's why she's gone on to help others do the same.  As the executive director for Kula for Karma and co-founder of Be Still, her goal is to offer therapeutic yoga, mindfulness, meditation, and breathwork to individuals in the workplace or those who don't have access to healthy healing modalities.  As someone who knows a thing or two about addiction, Feiner has taken it upon herself to help others see the light, like she once did, and she continues that noble quest in her conversation with Yuliana here today Episode Highlights:  Battling a cocaine addiction at a young age Feiner's brother's breaking point Why addiction doesn't go away Turning to food Her introduction to yoga and mindfulness Becoming your own best friend Quotes:  “I had been challenged with a cocaine addiction. And I am about to celebrate 40 years clean and sober. I think coming to terms with my issue with coke and my brother, who had been admitted as an inpatient, really was the motivation.” “I was part of a radical feminist group and a consciousness raising group for women. And we had loud voices at Colgate, because there were 100 of us and 3000 men.” “I was a weekend warrior… I would be thinking during the week as Thursday approached about where I was going to go, how I was going to get the drugs, how long was my supply going to last.” “Even with the years and years and years now of a yoga practice, mindfulness practice, and  meditation, the notion of just being okay with feeling lousy has been challenging for me.” “It's not so much about not being able to sit with the emotion as it is wanting to run from the intensity of the emotion, if that makes sense. I kind of got to this place with managing anxiety knowing that anxiety and stress are going to be a part of my experience on a daily basis. I'm not surprised anymore.” “We were kind of like the dynamic duo. We really supported each other and took care of each other in a way that was very special and continues to fuel our friendship and our love for each other as siblings.” “It's called Sita Ram.  The beginning of the verse is: Turn obstacles into opportunities, turn challenges into change, turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones, turn losses into gains, same landscape, different eyes, make the breath go inside, dive into uncertainty, and take a ride.” Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/penni-feiner-22b96b6/ (Penni Feiner on LinkedIn) https://kulaforkarma.org/ (Kula for Karma Homepage) ...

Today Yuliana welcomes nonprofit executive and leadership development coach, Loretta Turner, to the Phoenix Tales podcast to chat about the importance of community, code switching, and embracing authenticity.  As a young black girl growing up on the East Coast, Turner felt like she almost had to live a double life: one that felt true and family-centric and another filled with fear, caution, and stereotypes.  It wasn't until she was much older that she actually reconciled with her identity and truly became Loretta. Both Yuliana and Loretta go on to acknowledge that this was no small feat, noting that it's challenging to embrace yourself when your immediate environment encourages you not to.  In fact, that's part of the reason that Turner ditched New Jersey for sunnier sights in San Diego.  There she's not only enjoyed a great deal of personal and professional growth, but she's also met the most diverse friend group she's had in her life.  She currently works to make San Diego's outdoor spaces, trails, and beaches more accessible to communities of color, and she doesn't plan on slowing down.  In the wake of 2020 and the tragedy that was COVID-19, Turner has come face to face with the importance of community, which you will hear all about in today's inspiring episode. Episode Highlights:  Turner's move to San Diego Turner's academic epiphany Code switching Becoming Loretta Diversity in San Diego  The importance of community Quotes:  “I just wanted to get it out into the world and see what else was out there and see if I could challenge myself in an environment, especially one that I haven't grown up in or wasn't used to.” “I'm not a first generation student, but I am the first of my siblings to go to school. As I had mentioned, in high school, academics wasn't something I cared for. I was an athlete.” “I know that my parents loved and adored me, but I also sensed that they were disappointed in me…So this idea that I had gotten into school, and all of a sudden, I was good at it. I was getting good grades, and I had an interest. That's where that sense of worthiness… I felt like I had given up on myself.” “There was a lot of code switching that was happening, you know, we'd go to a family event over the weekend. And when Monday rolled around, I went back to school, like I didn't talk like that I didn't act like that.” “Code Switching happens when I'm now in a new environment, I go back to school, and now I'm really hesitant on how I speak. I'm really hesitant about what I share about myself, I'm really hesitant about how I carry myself…if I act the way that I've acted with my family around a predominantly white group, stereotypes might come up.” “We know that San Diego looks very white. And we know that a lot of the most beautiful places in this county are accessed by more privileged people that are predominantly white. So a lot of the work that I do in the county now is making those spaces, especially outdoor spaces, like beaches and trails, more accessible to communities of color.” “I love being an imaginative kid alone in my room, but what also equally helped me feel lit up was being in community, celebrations, parties, and bringing people together.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) http://www.lorettaturner.com/ (Loretta Turner Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/loretta.leads/ (Loretta Turner on Instagram) https://www.linkedin.com/in/lorettaleads/ (Loretta Turner on LinkedIn) Coming up on 10/6, Yuliana welcomes nonprofit executive and leadership development coach, Loretta Turner, to  @phoenixtalespodcast to chat about the importance of community, code switching, and...

On this episode of the Phoenix Tales podcast, we get to hear another inspiring story from yet another courageous Phoenix. Joining Yuliana today is Maryam Banikarim, a Purpose-Driven Marketer and Co-Founder of NYCNext. Maryam takes us through her seminal moments in life, from surviving the revolution of 1979 in Iran and moving across the globe to having to deal with her father's death at a young age and then taking on a new role in the family dynamics.  Maryam shares some vital moments that shaped her and made her who she is today – a courageous survivor. But Maryam is more than just a survivor; she's a fearless businesswoman, a loving mother, an inspiring person, and so much more. In this episode, she opens up about her defense mechanism - compartmentalizing emotions - and how it got her through the most heart-wrenching moments in life. Maryam continues to be resilient and fearless to this day in everything she does, whether that's getting on a plane right after the 9/11 attacks or starting a grassroots movement to help the city during COVID-19. As Maryam walks us through her emotional journey and reflects on her key phoenix-rising moments, we get to witness first-hand how even the most difficult experiences can strengthen us. Episode Highlights: Living through a revolution and becoming resilient in the process Experiencing one of the worst heartbreaks there is – the death of a parent Pros and cons of being fearless Turning traumatic events into powerful strengths The precious gift of helping others The song that describes Maryam's life Quotes: “It was all out of necessity, so I don't know that I really processed it the way that I might today. So, you were sort of picked up and dropped into different places, and you had to survive. So, I would say it's kind of all I knew. So, it's hard to look back with that lens per se.” “I think the way I got through life, for the most part, was being able to compartmentalize so that you could move on. So, I don't know, that was really the way I process things. I process by sort of putting one foot in front of the other and moving forward, not so much sort of living in that moment and feeling it.” “I think, as you experience revolution, and you see what happens, I was drawn to media because I believed in the power of storytelling and the story of being able to change the world. That sort of became a seminal thing in my life in which I ended up working.” “I was very conscious of never wanting to ask for anything or asking for help. That felt like a weakness, to some degree, a burden. So, I was very reticent to ask, and it's one of the things I tell my kids, I'm like, ‘People want to help you.' Asking is actually, you're giving somebody a gift of being able to help you.” “The song that was my anthem in college or high school was ‘I will survive' by Gloria Gaynor. […] I don't know that I understood the full nuance of the song except that I just knew I could survive.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/maryam-banikarim-737671/ (Maryam Banikarim on LinkedIn)

Joining Yuliana today is Kate Tellers, a staff member of The Moth and a co-author of How to Tell a Story: The Essential Guide to Memorable Storytelling. Kate shares her phoenix tale today of how she lost her mother at the young age of 28 and how this shaped her life. She shares how lessons she learned from her mom set her on the path to storytelling and how these lessons continue to echo even today. Kate recounts how her life experienced a redirection following the death of her mother, and also about her final moment with her mother with whom she had a close relationship. Talking about grief, Kate describes it as nonlinear and how she honors her mom. She also describes her relationship with her children as being influenced by losing her own mother and goes on to discuss discovering storytelling after her mom's death and the importance of storytelling in our lives. The episode ends with Kate sharing the one song that resonates with her life - a song about how life can be bittersweet. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Kate's life How the death of her mother shaped Kate's college years The final moments Handling the grief Kate's special ritual to honor her mom How losing her mom at a young age impacts Kate's relationship with her children Getting into storytelling Observing as a storyteller and still living in the present Kate talks about her new book The one song that resonates with Kate's life Quotes: “She went very fast. She just went from like a healthy person swimming laps, who happens to have cancer to a person that was no longer alive.” “What I learned most about losing my mother, like the greatest grief I've ever experienced, is that it's so nonlinear.” “I'm the mom that rolls on the floor with the kids. I mom so freaking hard because I have such respect for the relationship that you get and the form and the connection you can build with your children.” “When you tell a story about someone, you bring them alive. You bring them to the forefront of your mind and anyone who's listening, and that's magic to me .” “I am so invested in creating present moments with my kids. I just want to imprint myself on their tiny brains.” “Having a story brain forces me to laser focus in a way. I could be on the subway, and also rescheduling my appointment with my dermatologist while I'm listening to a podcast and looking out the window, remembering the time I went on a date at that restaurant.” “The true nature of life is that you can have great beauty and great sadness that sit aside each other.” “That Barbra Streisand version of ‘The Shadow of Your Smile'...my mother had a really, she had a huge smile. She just left her mark on you. She was the one at a party that found the quiet person in the corner and you would find them, like, laughing with their heads back ten minutes later, you know. She left a mark.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.amazon.com/How-Tell-Story-Essential-Storytelling/dp/0593139003 (How to Tell a Story) https://www.instagram.com/thekatetellers/ (Kate Tellers Instagram)

Yuliana welcomes Berny Serrão, the c0-owner of Paraiso Escondido, an eco-friendly sanctuary in Portugal. Berny shares her courageous tale, one filled with the ups and downs of being a nomad her entire life, seemingly not belonging anywhere. She also recounts feeling like an outsider before searching within to create her happiness and how she extends that warmth and love to her guests and others. Growing up amidst civil wars, Berny has always lived the nomad life. She talks about having to start a new life in Portugal with her husband after settling in Asia, as well as the challenges that came with this relocation despite her being of Portuguese descent. She goes on to discuss finding her creativity and happiness within and how her experiences created an extreme reality for her. To share her experiences with different people and different cultures which is something she has always loved, Berny turned her home into a guest house welcoming different people from across the world. The episode ends with Berny describing a song that resonates with her life, a song about always believing that something amazing is coming no matter how bad life gets. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Berny's life The lifestyle changes Berny had to make following her relocation to Portugal Berny's rough childhood Discovering the happiness and creativity within Creating a guesthouse in her home The one song that resonates with Berny's life Quotes: “If I had all the time, all the money, what would I love to do?” “I didn't become hard. I remain soft and gentle and caring, but you become so strong and things have got to be so hard for me to take notice that it's difficult when people complain or whine about certain things in their lives. And I find it difficult to relate because my reality was so extreme.” “Nature allowed me to go within. And that is basically when we talk about everything is within us, happiness is within us. Our love is within us. So I went inside because everything outside wasn't pleasant. So by going inside, I created my imaginary world.” “We as human beings are so simple, we just want to be noted and loved. So you feed them, and you give them love and warmth in your house. That's it, they don't need anything else. That's all they needed.” “I didn't want our guest experience to feel like a hotel. I wanted to meet different people from different parts of the globe, and I wanted to share our journey with them.” “Living in all those different countries with different cultures allowed me to be very understanding and respectful of cultures and being very open.” “The Weeknd has this great song, ‘I Feel It Coming'. And for me, I always see something amazing coming. It always makes me smile, because that's exactly what I see. I always had something amazing coming… No matter how bad my life has been, I'll always see something amazing coming.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://paraisoescondido.pt/ (Paraiso Escondido Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/paraiso_escondido/?hl=en (Paraiso Escondido Instagram)

Joining Yuliana today is Geri Topfer, the founder and president of Kula For Karma and co-founder of BeStill. Geri shares her phoenix tale involving her sobriety and how she gained strength to look inwards into her life and not just observe as an outsider. Geri recounts the feeling of being armored in her marriage due to past abandonment issues, and also how becoming sober propelled her to not just take control of her life, but also help others do the same. Geri begins the conversation by sharing how an addiction redirected the course of her life. She talks about living her life in fear and hiding, how this fear seeped into her marriage, and about finding solace in AA meetings and putting herself first despite having to raise her kids. Geri describes the various shifts in life she had to make and the future she looks forward to, even at age 60. The episode ends with Geri sharing the one song that resonates with her life, a song about dancing whenever you get the chance. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Geri's life Battling her social anxiety with drinking Living in fear and hiding Being armored in marriage Geri describes raising her kids despite her abandonment issues The shifts in Geri's life Looking forward to the future The one song that resonates with Geri's life Quotes: “Alcohol is really a disease. It is a disease, and I had no control.” “For six months, I just started to get progressive, where I became insane hiding the bottles, bringing them down in the garbage cans at the end of the driveway. It was really taking over my life.” “I always felt like an outsider looking in - the way I felt my whole life.” “It's like living life on life's terms. I approach it with many tools, I'm either moving towards sanity or moving towards chaos. And because of all the work - I've done a lifetime - I hope it doesn't take anyone how long it's taken me.” “I feel secure. I love myself, and I feel like I belong everywhere because I take myself everywhere.” “I am so thrilled that I still get an opportunity to be relevant and to learn and to grow.” “There's a song also if you get the chance to dance, dance, and I'm forgetting... the artist. But if you get the chance to dance, dance. Get up and dance.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://kulaforkarma.org/ (Kula For Karma Website) https://www.bestill.me/ (be.still) https://www.instagram.com/geritopfer/ (Geri's Instagram)

On this week's episode, Yuliana welcomes Catherine ‘Cat' Partheniades to the show to talk about the moment she found out she was adopted. She was 30 when this happened, and shortly after this discovery, both of her adoptive parents passed away. Today she chats with Yuliana about reckoning with her parents' lies, experiencing resentment, and her intense periods of drinking to repress the emotions she didn't know how to deal with or even want to deal with. It was only upon finding her biological family that she found solace in her identity and her parents' decision to withhold information from her. After coming into contact with her birth mother through Facebook, Cat remembers meeting her in Brazil as a blissful moment where she finally found the missing piece that she hadn't quite been able to place in her life before. Kim and our guest go on to talk about both Cat's birth and adoptive parents, and the pair close out the episode by talking about her experience healing from grief and complex emotions. It's certainly been an interesting ride for Cat Partheniades, but, as you will hear, she doesn't want this narrative to dominate her life. After all, she is so much more than that. Episode Highlights: Cat finding out she was adopted at 30 Her parents' lies Experiencing resentment toward her parents Setting pain aside Feeling like she's betraying her parents Finding her biological family through Facebook The quest for Charlotte's birth mom Reunification with Charlotte's biological family Charlotte's coming out Identity struggles Healing from grief Ed Sheeran's Photograph Quotes: “Facing the health challenges of both her parents, she finds out that she's adopted, even amid the pain of losing her parents and this life altering discovery, she finds a way toward acceptance of her life and more importantly, herself.” “I did get into contact with my biological family, and at that point in time, I finally felt that I was at home with myself— with the universe in a sense - because when I met my biological family, that's where I belong, in a sense. It has nothing to do with the adoptive side not loving me or anything like that.” “I knew that because growing up, my father was Greek, my mother was Brazilian. And the story that they told me was, they tried to have a baby for like, 16 years, and I was the miracle baby. And instead of having me here in the States, where my mom had no family, they decided to take my mom to Brazil to be around family.” “I think initially, I was so overwhelmed with knowing that I was going to lose my parents, then eventually dealing with grief. I wish I didn't have to deal with the adoption part of my life. I found it to be very overwhelming, to be very honest. I did a great job in hiding those feelings from people.” “When you look at the bigger picture, how can I be mad at people that wanted to love me and protect me so hard? That's when I kind of started to learn it and that's what gave me peace with everything.” “Oh my god, I felt like I was floating. I felt like I wanted to throw up and cry. It was just so overwhelming, but it was so beautiful. My wife got to witness all the emotions all at once where she told me the story. She told me that everyone in the family knew about me. And she also told me that she's been waiting for me for 33 years to contact her.” “Thankfully, they're both really great people, both sides of my bio family are amazing and very welcoming to me. And that's also been really overwhelming, but in the most positive sense.” “My grief cycle, the way I remember it, was grieving my mother, grieving my father, and then grieving myself and who I thought I was.” “I still say I'm Greek and Brazilian, because I am; that's never going to leave me. Just because genetically I might not be those things, I was raised in that environment.” “That documentation that I found gave me a sense of peace, because I finally figured out who I truly am.” “This song Photograph by

Therese Murphy joins Yuiliana on the show today to share her courageous phoenix tale. Therese worked as a former nonprofit development manager and found herself unemployed during COVID. She recounts how this propelled her to get a job as the hostess at a restaurant where she was faced with the duality of human nature and how her experiences taught her valuable lessons that continue to impact her life. Therese begins by sharing the event that redirected the course of her life - losing her job during COVID. She shares her experience working in nonprofit development and the events that led up to taking up a new job in a restaurant, and talks about how humans can be cruel and kind, as well as the many challenges she faced while working in the restaurant. Therese also shares with us the impacts of the pandemic on human socialization and how she gathered important life lessons from observing customers and coworkers alike. The episode comes to a close as Therese shares the one song that describes her life - Loves Song by Patti Scialfa, a song about having the courage to put yourself out there, just as Therese has done. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Therese's life Her nonprofit career Therese describes working in a restaurant and getting a firsthand view of humanity The effect of the pandemic on how humans socialized The challenges Therese faced working in the restaurant How working in a restaurant allowed her to learn more about her personality Dealing with traumas Her future in writing The one song that describes Therese's life Quotes: “All of us think that we're good customers or good guests in a restaurant. But then once you see people and how demanding they can be and unreasonable at times, how absolutely kind and generous and wonderful they can be at other times, it's hard not to notice that the restaurant kind of brought out the best and the worst in people.” “It's as if people are having to re-acclimate themselves to living in the greater society after having been kept indoors for two years.” “I learned that it was kind of fulfilling to help these people make maybe a slightly better living because I could control the flow of the restaurant and keep things moving and calm customers after 20 years of nonprofit.” “'Loves Glory' by Patti Scialfa... this song is about having the courage to put yourself out there, and that sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. The song is about accepting that and that the effort alone in doing something, especially in a loving way, is worth it.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)

Yuliana welcomes opera singer and teacher Natalie Wilson to today's Phoenix Tales episode to discuss Natalie's decision to abandon her opera career and how this choice, coupled with a divorce not too long after, marked a rather poignant moment for her.  Having felt that she'd wasted decades of her life embarking on a career path that she no longer desired, Natalie notes that she suffered from an identity crisis after tying her self worth into her career for so long.  Not until she met her friend Cat did she start to find herself again, and together they went on to perform cabaret at parties as a side gig.   Soon after she started attending therapy sessions to overcome her deeply ingrained belief that she was worthless so long as her career was over.  It's these sessions that have helped Natalie live in the present, but she admits that this can sometimes prevent her from making necessary future plans. Most importantly, however, she has learned to find self worth beyond the numbers on her paycheck, and fame, or lack thereof.  She closes out this episode by embracing and appreciating what she has.  She remarks that it's time that she started valuing teaching for the stability it provides her rather than serving as a reminder of a bygone career. Episode Highlights:  Coming to the decision to quit her opera career Feeling like she embarked on the wrong career path Having an identity crisis Her duo's cabaret ambitions Natalie's experience with therapy  Living in the present Finding worth outside of her paycheck or status Embracing teaching Quotes:  “So I made the very difficult decision to leave that career behind. And then shortly thereafter, I also got divorced from a 17 year long relationship and completely reinvented my life the next few years after that.” “Well, I didn't figure out what my voice was doing until I was 34. It was kind of like, ‘Well, okay, great. Now you sound awesome. And now it's too late for you to do any of these young artists programs.' So that was one of the challenges that I ran into.” “Maybe I shouldn't have gone for the thing I thought I was more likely to be successful at and really gone for the thing that was in my bones and in my heart.” “‘You've been putting every ounce of every fiber of your being into this career for the last 15 years and you're miserable.  You're clearly miserable.' And I actually let myself stop.” “Every ounce of my identity was tied up in me being an opera singer. So it was really, really, really painful.” “I don't know what's going to happen when we get old, but my daily life is actually pretty good.” “I realize that I have worth as a human being, even if I'm not famous or getting a paycheck from some, you know, a TV network or something.” “Getting some validation from my family that they didn't look at me as a failure because of my career choices really helped to soothe some wounds for me.” “Regret is not an emotion that I connect with very strongly.” “So the piece that comes to mind right away is ‘Moments in the Woods' from Into the Woods by Mr. Sondheim who left us this year.  Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://nataliewilson.com/ (Natalie Wilson Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/playwrightnat/ (Natalie Wilson on Instagram) Yuliana welcomes opera singer and teacher Natalie Wilson to this week's  @PhoenixTalesPodcast to talk about Natalie's decision to abandon her opera career and how this choice, coupled with a divorce not too long after, marked a rather poignant moment for her.  She learned to find self worth beyond the numbers on her paycheck, and fame, or lack...

This week, Yuliana is joined by guest Laura Hill, who opens up the episode to talk about the moment she decided to leave her husband after 30 years of marriage. Having met when she was 19 and he was 10 years her senior, Laura had to mature at a young age, eventually realizing that she had a lot of growing to do, and that this needed to take place outside of her marriage.  Since then, she's learned about the importance of therapy and how to allow herself to feel joy.   Laura goes on to talk about how beneficial therapy has been, and why it's allowed her to start dating again.  And while she finds the dating world much less stressful than she did as a teenager, she feels content for the first time in her life being on her own.  She draws the episode to its conclusion by raving about her first year on her own in the past three decades, and how  excited she is to return to herself. Episode Highlights: Deciding to divorce her husband  Growing up too early as a child Her brother's diagnosis with Schizophrenia The importance of therapy Allowing herself to experience joy Healing childhood trauma  The stigma around not having children Dating post-divorce Learning to enjoy your own company Quotes: “The fun part is I kind of get to relive the experience of being in my early 20s, with the knowledge of being in my 50s which is exciting and terrifying at the same time.” “I feel like, because of some of the life experiences that I had as a child, that I never really fit in with my peers anyway.” “I was always guarded. You know, I had friends, but there was always kind of this shell that I had on.” ”In ending that marriage, I've just kind of had to sort through everything, not just the marriage, not just that ending, but also really, once and for all, just deal with some of the stuff that I just kind of pushed to the bottom for too long.” “I feel like at six, your personality is pretty solidly formed, but also your soul hasn't been completely crushed by life experiences.” “I can just focus on what I'm dealing with from the past, and put it to bed, and not have to worry about anybody else's reaction to what I'm going through, and I love that.” “I have always felt like things are going too well, something bad is going to happen.” “The good thing about dating now, is, there's no pressure.” Laura's song - “Independent Woman” by Destiny's Child Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)

This week on Phoenix Tales, Yuliana welcomes author, speaker, and former Associate Dean and Chief Communications Officer, Harvard Medical School, Gina Vild to the podcast. Gina talks today about losing her mother, her father's stroke, and her own subsequent divorce, noting that her parents' deaths played large roles in her decision to get a divorce. These events revealed to her that life is simply too short to live unhappily, and only after her divorce did she learn the power of meditation, which she says has since totally changed her life.   Gina goes on to remember the moments after her divorce when she felt alone and heartbroken.  To assuage the pain, she wrote goodbye and hello letters to herself to immerse herself in her emotions and overcome them.  Likewise, she started practicing habits of gratitude that she says changed her psyche immensely.  When asked about how her children were impacted by the divorce, she says that she finds it extremely important for them to know they are loved by both parents.  To draw this episode to a close, Gina makes a profound statement that resilience comes to those who are fearless and looking to forge new paths.    Episode Highlights:  Gina's parents' deaths Her realization that life is short Gina's decision to get a divorce The power of mantra meditation Moments of loneliness and doubt post-divorce Practicing gratitude The power of love The importance of resilience Quotes:  “I think the work you're doing is so important because everyone is struggling with resilience. In life, no one escapes adversity, and with the pandemic, it's becoming increasingly important.” “The trouble is you think you have time.” “I knew that life was so precious. I did not want to be in a relationship that I felt was not all that it could be, and that had been so disappointing. And so I took a leap - I feel like it was like a freefall without a net.” “When you are raised in an environment where you have so much love -  and I did, as I said - it makes you confident about the world, it makes you believe the world is safe and can be trusted.” “Make a gift of yourself. It may not be what's right or enough for everyone, but you will find your path. And that was the moment all of that worrying and insecurities for the most part stopped.” “No one escapes pain and death and loss, you know, and are you going to let that be what directs these few short years you have, or are you going to ground yourself in what's important to you?” Gina's song: “Life is Calling” by Beth Hart. Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) Email Gina https://www.amazon.com/Two-Most-Important-Days-Healthier/dp/1250119367 (The Two Most Important Days by Gina Vild)

Sharon Simpson joins Yuliana today to talk about her work in the art industry and what it was like growing up in Belfast during the war. She opens up the conversation by talking about a tough time she went through when her husband's new job forced her to move away from hers.  She notes that she felt worse, not because she lost an income, but because she lost her community.  Sharon goes on to talk about her experience working in the art industry and the round-a-bout way she found her role at the Museum of Natural History. She traces her success and aptitude for change to her childhood in Belfast during the ‘Troubles'.  Simpson has worked to overcome the trauma from this time by learning how to take risks and not look back. This is something she learned from her mother, and, as a girl, she always looked up to her mother for her cool-headedness and resilience.  Simpson brings this episode to a nice conclusion by sharing her greatest lesson.  Coming from her background, it would be easy to feel discouraged or that life is a series of road blocks.  Sharon, however, takes the high road, and she values her sense of childlike optimism.  She's proud of the fact that she continues to see the good in life, despite seeing so much of the bad.  Episode Highlights:  Simpson's experience moving away from a job she loved What her life was like working for a museum Moving from London back to New York City Why she wanted to escape Belfast as a child Overcoming trauma How Sharon got her foot in the door at the Museum of Natural History The importance of not looking back Why her mother is Sharon's greatest role model The importance of childlike optimism Quotes:  “The advantage is that you plan your own time, and I found that incredible. I found that I was so much more productive because it was just me sitting at home. Obviously, I had to have phone meetings with people. But I didn't have to be anywhere at any particular time. I was in California, and I was working with people on the East Coast.” “So the way that I dealt with that was to create a community. So I reached out to designers, writers, copy editors; people that I had known and worked with through the years.  I hired myself as a contractor to come and work on projects, and we created our own little community.” “What it did do was it made me turn in on myself, I don't mean that in a negative way. So I became a great reader, because reading is always a great escape. And it's a wonderful escape during a war. And I became very obsessed with music.” “I actually did grow up right in the middle of Belfast, so I was not in a leafy suburb. So I was very exposed to everything that was going on around me, I was in bomb scares, I was in bomb buildings. I was in all kinds of situations. But I was a teenager.” “When you take risks, you're gonna make mistakes, and the healthy thing to do is just learn from those mistakes.” “I had this great start in life, with the family that I had. And throughout my teenage years, when things were really very difficult, my mother always just kept a very, very steady head and I think didn't ever instill in us any kind of sense of panic.” Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharonsimpson/ (Sharon Simpson on LinkedIn)

This week on Phoenix Tales, Yuliana talks to Leehe Segal, a jewelry designer and the owner of Bleecker and Prince. In their conversation, Leehe delves into her experiences in the Israeli army, what it was like delivering her second child at home, and moving to Singapore.  She starts today's conversation by recounting her decision to have an at-home birth - delivering a baby under COVID protocols would mean that she would potentially need to give birth alone, and that wasn't an option.  Leehe then proceeds to talk about another time when she was posed with a rather pivotal challenge.  After ending her previous job at a diamond company on bad terms, she finally took the step to open up her own fine jewelry business which has taught her independence and the confidence to deal with obstacles.  She thinks that her experience of moving to Singapore at a young age and joining the Israeli army at 18 might have introduced her to notions of resilience and adversity as well.  Leehe also recalls how moving back and forth from Singapore made her feel like she never fit in.  Yuliana and Leehe conclude this episode by talking about how her experiences as a child impacts the way she rears her children.  Episode Highlights:  Why Leehe decided to have an at-home birth Getting fired from her job at the diamond company Starting Bleecker and Prince Leehe's experience joining the Israeli army at 18 What it was like moving to Singapore for five years at a young age Her experience as a child not knowing where she fit in How childhood trauma impacts the way Leehe parents Quotes:  “I had this dream of doing a home birth, but I never had the courage to go through with it. They went on the news saying that people going into the hospital, they might end up coming in alone, and just the thought of going into hospital alone to experience this gave me that last push I needed.” “When I was going through the pregnancy process, and then through motherhood, it was fascinating to me how fraught, you know, and how politically charged a lot of these decisions are about childbirth, right?” “Moving to a foreign country for first grade, and not knowing the language–and also going back to Israel to a town very different in culture than Singapore, and maybe not having like, you know, the support that I needed to deal with this experience. So I dealt a lot on my own.” “I had many years in my life more as an observer and not knowing how I fit in the situation.” “It took me a while to adjust and to understand and to lose that feeling of being lost.” “The boundaries are much bigger than what you think with every experience that you add to your life.” Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.instagram.com/bleeckerandprince/?hl=en (Bleecker and Prince on Instagram) https://bleeckerandprince.com/ (Bleecker and Prince Homepage)

On this week's episode of Phoenix Tales, Giulia Pline joins Yuliana today to discuss the skiing accident that changed her life mentally, physically, and emotionally.  An ex dancer turned yoga instructor, Giulia feels that the accident taught her to appreciate her body and its resilience.  After breaking her arm, collarbone, six ribs, puncturing her lung, and lacerating a liver in the accident, she underwent an intense healing process emotionally and physically, which she describes here today. Giulia highlights the fact that she had to reckon with her emotions far more than she anticipated considering she lacked the full range of her body.   In the wake of the accident, she felt an immense sense of guilt and fear, and she notes that she misses how carefree she used to be before this five year healing process began.  Journaling and breathwork, however, have really helped her through it all.  Above all else though, she's found a deep sense of gratitude for her body and its strength, because she realizes that it can be taken away from her in the blink of an eye.  Yuliana and Giulia draw this episode to a close by expressing even more gratitude for the family and friends that stuck by her during her injury.   Episode Highlights: Giulia's ski accident Her healing process emotionally and physically Experiencing fear and guilt post-accident Learning who she is in the absence of movement The importance of breathwork and journaling Gratitude for her body and support network Her love for the Bee Gee's “Shining Star” Quotes:  “I broke my right upper arm, my right collarbone, six ribs, and suffered a punctured lung and a lacerated liver. So that landed me in the hospital for almost two weeks.” “When I wanted to get back into teaching, I was still recovering. I still had my arm in a sling, and it was almost too soon that I had to go back to start making money again. But what it did was really force me to use my words and manage my energy in order to not burn out and still be taking care of myself while getting back into the swing of things.” “So much happens when you get injured. But one of the things that happens is the map of your body that lives in your brain gets smudged, kind of like if you had a subway map in front of you, and you accidentally spilled coffee on it.” “When something really traumatic happens, we have choices.  We could go down the path that numbs it out so that we never feel that pain again, or we could slowly, with help and support of others, try to ease in there and learn from that experience.” “It's a gratitude for having a body that can do all of the things that need to be done without me having to ask: the breathing, heart rate, circulation, digestion– Because when you're injured, or you had something happen, you really see how quickly that can shift and go away.” Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.giuliapline.com (Giulia Pline Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/giuliapline/ (Giulia Pline on Instagram)

Documentary filmmaker and author Ann Shin joins Yuliana on the podcast this week. Ann's documentary My Enemy, My Brother was shortlisted for a 2016 Academy Award and nominated for an Emmy. Her previous documentary, The Defector: Escape from North Korea, won 7 awards including Best Documentary and Best Documentary Director at the 2014 Canadian Screen Academy Awards, a SXSW Interactive Award, and a Canadian Digi Award. In addition to these accomplishments, her book The Family China won the Anne Green Award and was shortlisted for the Gerald Lampert Poetry Prize. In today's conversation, Ann shares the details of how her mother's accident, coma, brain injury and eventual death have impacted her life. She opens the episode up by talking about her mother's accident that bound her to a 100 day coma and a subsequent brain surgery. She notes that she had to suffer the loss of her mother at the age of nine, despite the fact that she was still alive, and that she didn't process the trauma until her ‘20s and ‘30s.  As a workaholic with children of her own, she attributes her hardworking tendencies to a need for validation and financial security, especially after her mother lost her sense of self to the injury.  Ann and Yuliana go on to talk about Ann's experience ignoring her own emotional needs, how seeing her mother's world shrink to the confines of her home was rather traumatic for her, and how she's now gotten to the point that she longs to live her life for her mother and grandmother.  The pair close out the episode by talking about Ann's debut novel, The Last Exiles, as well as her mother's death in her late ‘70s.   Episode Highlights: Ann's mother's coma and subsequent brain surgery Mourning the loss of her mother Processing the trauma later in her 20s and 30s Ann's experience as a workaholic The desire for validation and security How Ann's mother's world shrunk exponentially Ignoring her own emotional needs Living for her mother and grandmother Her novel, The Last Exiles Her mother's death in her late ‘70s Quotes:  “By the time that she did actually wake up from a coma, we'd gotten used to the notion that our mother had changed. And so it was a really strange experience.” “We had a very comfortable life, up until when my mother had her accident, they had their business.  My father was also a real estate broker, my mother was working as a nurse. We took vacations, and we had a nice home and all that. But then after her accident, everything went downhill, we didn't have the money that we had once had. So as an adult, in my 20s, and into my early 30s, I was always kind of concerned, like, I'd end up on the street.” “The parameters of her life closed into, basically, the four walls of the house that she lived in.” “With my mother, it's complicated because her brain injury so affected her mind and her intellectual capacity, and I think what happened for me internally was I couldn't even acknowledge my own needs as a kid. I didn't feel like, you know, it was anything I wanted to bring up with my mother, so then I couldn't even acknowledge it within myself.” “A lot of what I did in my early 20s, was like, forge an identity for myself in this culture. I'm working, having relationships, and having sex. It was like in the parlance of my peers, which is this North American lifestyle, and it was not something I could share with the rest of my family.” “I feel like a lot of us women, we're standing on the shoulders of other giant women that went before us, and that we feel and benefit from their legacy. So I feel that not only was I wanting to live in some way for my mother, but also for my grandmother on my mother's side.” “In terms of my career, it's so interesting. I, you know, I work mainly with women. The company that I founded is a film company, and it's women led.  It's mainly women and I enjoy working with women of all ages. We've got everyone from the age of like,...

On this episode of Phoenix Tales, Yuliana welcomes Kelly Fife, a psychologist in the public school system who hopes to help children who grow up with troubling family situations.  She opens the episode by describing the moment her father suggested that she attend her first Al-Anon meeting. Growing up with parents who abused alcohol, she notes that the chaotic nature of her household led her to strive for constant perfection.  She recalls that, as a child, she always knew that something wasn't right, and it took her quite a while to mourn the loss of a normal childhood.  Currently Kelly finds herself in a good place and her relationship with her parents has taken a turn for the better.  She  acknowledges the importance of acceptance and detachment, especially as it relates to her mother's current drinking habits, and how she and her father are now able to have open and honest conversations that really help her heal.  As Kelly embarks on her own spiritual healing journey, she feels all the more connected to her work with children and other women.  She closes out the episode by explaining that she wishes she could be the mentor she needed as a young girl for other children.   Episode Highlights:  Her parents' abusive relationship with alcohol Kelly's lack of trust  Al-Anon's structure Her father's sobriety and how that impacted his parenting The importance of acceptance and detachment Her work as a school psychologist  The importance of being a mentor to young children who grew up like her.   ‘Bluebird' by Miranda Lambert Quotes:  “When the fighting didn't stop, when the house was chaotic, I think I turned to that perfectionism in my head as a coping mechanism.” “The topic of the meeting was about trust, and the woman who was speaking about trust, I don't remember what she said, however I remember that I was fighting back tears the entire time she was talking, because I realized I did not trust anyone.” “Al-Anon empowered me to take an honest look in the mirror and realize that, yes, although these things were out of my control, I can take control back over my life–by healing these things that were learned in childhood, I had to do a lot of unlearning.” “As I look back, I intuitively always knew something wasn't quite right. I never knew what it was, you know, until I got into Al-Anon, but I just always knew something wasn't quite right and that life didn't always have to be this way.” “I was angry that I felt at the time, you know, my parents really let me down. And I felt like I was robbed.” “I'm very fortunate in that I did grow up in a loving home. I grew up in a challenging and chaotic home as well. For my story, both are true. I chose to take a journey of healing, instead of continuing to sweep it under the rug.” “As I've delved more into my spiritual journey and my healing journey, I've wanted to pivot more into that emotional, spiritual, body, mind healing–working with other women who grew up in a home like me.” Links:  https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)  Kelly Fife on Instagram: @Innerlotus_rising

On this week's episode of Phoenix Tales, Yuliana welcomes Pam Reece to the show to talk about the moment when her father lost his job, his subsequent battle with Alzheimer's disease, and how those events shaped her outlook on life. A  former yoga instructor who now offers her many skills to help women in corporate America achieve success, Reece opens today's conversation by describing the length of her father's career and the identity crisis that took place when that career was suddenly taken from him.  She learned that professions aren't always stable, as she once believed, and it gave her the courage to follow her occupational dreams, because she knew that it could be taken from her in the blink of an eye.   The pair also talk about Reece's father's terminal battle with Alzheimer's, and how, as his sole caregiver, Pam learned how to compartmentalize her emotions to help coordinate and plan his medical treatment.  She details the guilt she felt being so far away from him during his time of suffering and how that distance helped her cope as well.  The weight of it all, however, didn't hit her until a few months after his passing.  Since then, she has  worked as a yoga instructor and gone on to help women struggling with stressful jobs better cope with their seemingly insurmountable workload.  Yuliana closes this moving conversation by asking Pam what song speaks to her dad and why.  While Reece initially isn't quite sure, she eventually concludes that Van Morrison's “Into The Mystic” feels right.     Episode Highlights: How Pam's father lost his job His identity crisis Reece's realization that she should build a career she's passionate about.   Her father's Alzheimer's diagnosis Reece's experience as his sole caretaker The guilt she felt being so far away Alzheimer's as a long goodbye How grief hit Pam months after her father's death How his death altered her empathetic capacity Her love for Van Morrison's lyrics in “Into The Mystic” Quotes:  “I thought the message that I got was, ‘Wow, he put all this time in, worked his way up, was very loyal to this company, and then snap.  It's gone.  So why would I do something that I didn't really love or care about and put that time in, when it could be taken away instantly?'” “The lesson of seeing your identity be wrapped up in a job, a career that doesn't fulfill you, that was always in the back of my mind, that was always looping there that you don't want to do that.” “It's impossible to really describe until, you know, when you meet someone who is in a similar situation, and their parent has been diagnosed at a younger age.  There's this knowing amongst us, because as you said, there's a certain point when someone is much older—you can be a bit more sanguine about it, but when they're younger, it's devastating.” “Well, you know, the thing which is said about Alzheimer's is that it's a very long goodbye.  When he passed to another plane, I did not realize how difficult that would be, because I guess I thought ‘You've been saying goodbye all along.'” “The more human experience that you have, certainly, the bigger your empathy grows.  And I've always thought of myself as an empathetic person, but certainly, you are able to see how people do what I did, what a lot of us do, you just fare forward, you steal yourself and keep going.” “It's interesting how grief somehow then opens up, at least for me, the flood of memories from much, much further back.  Because, again, I'm not in the moment of needing to figure out what we need to do today.  So suddenly, everything can open up and you can look back and relive a lot of great things, great times.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram)...

Yuliana welcomes New York City lawyer, Paola Garcia, to the podcast today.  After running away from her sheltered life and home in Mexico at the age of 18, Paola was forced to reckon with her status as a Mexican immigrant in the U.S. and American culture at large.  She recalls the shock she experienced when coming to the U.S. after growing up in the rather strict Mexican class system, and details how the anti-immigration sentiments in the U.S. exhaust her so much that it almost makes her want to abandon New York City for home.   Paola goes on to compare and contrast Mexico's immigration capacity with that of their American neighbor up north, and the pair then discuss Paola's transition from Texas to New York when she was accepted into Columbia Law School.  She notes that her parents seemed to respect her more once she got into a prestigious university and achieved some semblance of autonomy.  Looking back, she regrets living in “survival mode” for such a long period of time as she struggled to stop seeing herself as that 18 year old runaway girl. In concluding the conversation, Paola notes that, if she could listen to any song or artist that reminds her of her childhood, she would choose Louis Armstrong or Charlie Parker. Episode Highlights: Running away from home to take control of her own life Managing the discourse of immigration in the U.S. Paola's experience with Mexico's class system  Anti-immigration sentiments in the U.S.   Current heavy immigration into Mexico Paola's exhaustion by racism  Her move from Texas to NYC Paola's regret for living in “survival mode” for so long Her love for jazz  Quotes:  “It's a very traditional culture, where it's seen as something very shameful to leave your parents home, especially at such a young age. So my father, of course, did not approve of this. And they were becoming, you know, increasingly controlling. And all I wanted was to study and to have agency over my own life. And I remember having this dream to live on my own, really, since the age of six.” “Similarly, El Paso, Texas, is a very Mexican American town. And I was extremely surprised by the way that I was treated, especially by the Mexican Americans; they expressed a lot of resentment because of the fact that it was obvious that I came from a good family, although now I was on my own.” “I also realized how, although in Mexico we don't check a box, whether you're white, indigenous or something. We are all Mexican.” “We also have so many immigrants from countries that are really struggling like Venezuela, Colombia, the Central American countries, Cuba. We don't have the resources to deal with an influx of millions of people who either want to stay there working or are waiting to cross to the U.S.  The system is not, you know, wealthy or strong enough to sustain this influx of people who suddenly appeared in Mexico City.” “My mom said, I was a feminist since the age of three. And by that she means that I was constantly observing, you know, the inequalities and, like, oppression of women, and I really, really didn't like it.” “I think my only regret is that I didn't at some point sort of stop living in this survival mode. Until very recently, I began to just look back at my life and realize that I had been really living like that 18 year old runaway girl, and it's this impulse of survival that is no longer relevant to my life.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/paola-garcia-b98ba71a6/ (Paola Garcia's LinkedIn)

Rashanna Green joins Yuliana today as the pair discuss Green's mother and her life-altering battle with late onset Schizophrenia. A Dartmouth graduate turned nonprofit executive and forest yoga lineage guardian, Rashanna details the moment she decided to institutionalize her mother, how that choice impacted her own psyche, and the stigma surrounding mental health in the black community. Green begins the conversation by describing her childhood growing up in an unsafe and impoverished neighborhood. It was difficult to discern whether her mother's fears and behaviors were a rational product of their surroundings or a mental disorder. She decided to admit her mother after a psychotic break in her 50s. Taking away her parent's autonomy was a traumatic event for both mother and daughter. Rashanna was in business school at the time and struggled to find balance between taking care of herself and her mother. As the oldest sibling, Green felt it was her responsibility to keep everything under control, despite feeling like she was drowning under all of the pressure. She felt selfish for wanting to be rid of the financial and emotional burden and resented that she needed to care for the woman who was supposed to be her guardian. And while her mother is stable today, living on her own and taking daily medication, Rashanna found it extremely challenging to start prioritizing herself. Only when she began her yoga training did she start to live life for herself like she had always done for others. She learned to ask for help, ground herself in her emotions, and take a step back sometimes. Yuliana and Rashanna close the conversation by discussing mental health approaches or lack thereof in the African American community. Green argues that avoiding the impact of slavery, poverty, and discrimination does little to heal generational trauma. Episode Highlights: Green's decision to institutionalize her mother for schizophrenia Feeling like she betrayed her mother What it was like growing up in an impoverished community Her mother's experience losing her own mother at the age of 10 How Green's care for her mother prevented her from caring for herself Resenting the financial and emotional burden of her mother's care Becoming a forest yoga lineage guardian How yoga helped her care for herself first Her mother is presently healthy and independent Why the African American community should confront trauma instead of running away from it Why Green would like to meet Malcolm X the most Quotes: “Whatever she was going through was something she bottled up and shoved somewhere deep inside, and was putting her head down and getting through.” “It was quite disorienting, but I had to forcibly have her institutionalized to start to get some care, which is, in and of itself, a very traumatic event to experience. Your daughter—is saying something's wrong with you that you're not connecting with. And the next thing you know, you're being held somewhere against your will. So it's very disorienting, compromising trust.” “That is a very difficult thing to be in that moment where you're taking that choice away from your parent, where you're stepping in a caregiver role, and you are trying to do what you think is best for them, even if they don't see it.” “The first barrier is breaking the pattern of putting your head down, acknowledging that it's okay to ask for help to get that assistance, that it doesn't make you lesser than, it doesn't make you less capable.” “My practice in force yoga is something that brought me to an introspective, contemplative way of unliving.” “The struggle in the African American community in general, is a cultural thing, especially my mom and her siblings— coming from parents and grandparents who have come through slavery, post slavery, and the desire to move beyond the struggles of the past, and to try not to feel like you're wallowing in them—that you're not letting them hold you back.” Links: Phoenix...

Joining Yuliana today is Dawn Skorczewski, a former professor of English at Brandeis University. Dawn is now a tutor and lecturer at Amsterdam University College (AUC), where she is also the coordinator of languages, co-coordinator of Academic Writing Skills and co-coordinator of the AUC Writing Center. In today's conversation, she recounts her story of working hard to become a professor at Brandeis, the impact the toxic work environment there had upon her personal and professional life, and how she has successfully responded to it all. Dawn begins by sharing her professional journey as a professor and how she came to realize that she was unhappy where she worked. She talks about her resilience when she was diagnosed with depression due to her toxic work environment and how she finally summoned the courage to leave that environment and thrive in another. The episode comes to a close as Dawn shares the one song that describes her life - ‘After All' by Dar Williams, a song that helped her in dark times. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Dawn's life A realization in Amsterdam Dawn's teaching career Dawn's story of resilience How Dawn's identity was wrapped up in her work A fall into depression Setting boundaries and becoming confident in your discernment The one song that describes Dawn's life Quotes: “Suddenly, I realized I was not in the right place. I didn't want to be there anymore, and I didn't know what I was going to do to get out.” “I was like a juggler and had 12 balls, but I couldn't keep them all in the air.” “I started to experience the quiet of not having 40 emails in my box. I didn't have people asking me for anything. I wasn't supervising anybody. I didn't have any students. I didn't have people asking me for letters of recommendation. I wasn't on any committees. I wasn't the chair of anything. I was like just there in the world.” “Rather than saying that I learned to separate ‘Dawn The Academic' from Dawn, it's sort of the opposite. I learned and I worked and I still work to embrace the fact that that person who published those books, who teaches those classes, who gives these workshops, and has a file on her email from people who have gone out into the world and done amazing things. That's me.” “Do not let poison into your life, because you're gonna feel bad, whether it's a poison that you ingest or a poison of someone's words that come into your ears.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) Dawn's email

Joining Yuliana today is Rebecca Babcock, CPC, ELI-MP, CLDS. A career and executive leadership coach, Rebecca has an advanced degree in Human and Organizational Development and Group Dynamics from Vanderbilt University and over 20 years experience as a Sales and Marketing Executive at global blue chip companies and tech startups including Conde Nast (VOGUE, GQ, LUCKY and Glamour), eBay, Taboola and Shutterstock. Her phoenix tale, which she shares here today, revolves around her battle with an autoimmune disease from her teenage years on, and how she has persevered and thrived despite the significant impact this illness has had upon her life and career. Rebecca begins by sharing the event that redirected the course of her life - her diagnosis with ulcerative colitis. She shares how she refused to let the illness define her and decided to face the illness head-on. Rebecca goes on to discuss how the illness impacted her life, the surgeries she had to undergo, the emotional toll her illness has taken, and how she quit her corporate job and launched a new career. As you will hear, Rebecca's story is truly one of immense courage and bravery. The episode comes to a close as Rebecca shares the one song that best describes her life - 'Dancing In The Moonlight', because “life gets 'lifey', so sometimes you just need to dance.” Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Rebecca's life Battling with ulcerative colitis The impact of Rebecca's disease on her teenage years A decision to face her illness head-on How Rebecca's health influenced her decisions Her series of surgeries Moments of emotion Figuring life out The one song that best describes Rebecca's life Quotes: “It's truly a chronic autoimmune disease in which my body thinks that my colon is a foreign object, and it's attacking it always.” “I basically decided for myself that this disease was not going to define me.” “Be a warrior, not a worrier.” “Until you face adversity, you're not quite sure how you'll respond. And that's the gift of being diagnosed at 16. I had adversity just in my back pocket when I woke up in the morning.” “The last thing I felt like really was sort of breaking my spirit completely was accepting the fact that I, I'm probably not going to have children.” 'What came to me is that there's a real lack in the marketplace out there for somebody who's working on the holistic approach to your career and your life.” “You can't dance and stay uptight. It's a supernatural delight.” “No colon, still rollin'.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.instagram.com/rbc.coaching/ (Rebecca's Instagram) https://www.rebeccababcockcoaching.com/ (Rebecca's website) https://www.linkedin.com/in/rebeccababcock1/ (Rebecca's LinkedIn)

Author, grieving mother, quotidian philosopher and optimist, Maryanne O'Hara, joins Yuliana on the podcast today. A remarkably accomplished individual, Maryanne has earned her MFA from Emerson College, taught creative writing at both Enerson and Clark University, and has written short stories, the novel CASCADE, and the memoir LITTLE MATCHES. She has also suffered the loss of her beloved daughter, Caitlin, to cystic fibrosis, and today she shares with us her phoenix tale of dealing with this tragic loss, and how she coped with her grief by writing about grief itself. Maryanne begins by describing the event that changed the course of her life; her daughter's death. She talks about the grief journey and how she immersed herself in writing a memoir in real time, while still stricken with grief. She goes on to discuss how, propelled by Caitlin's life and death, she has been seeking answers to life's big questions. The episode rounds off with Maryanne sharing the one song that best describes her life - 'These Are The Days Of Our Lives' by Queen. Episode Highlights: The tragic event that redirected the course of Maryanne's life Battling with cystic fibrosis The challenge of having a chronic illness at a young age A grief journey of 5 years and counting Writing Caitlin's memoir in real-time A new purpose The impact of Caitlin's illness and death on the family Finding closure at the end of writing the book Recording the audiobook Life's big questions A unique way of honoring Caitlin's life The one song that best describes Maryanne's life Quotes: “Life could change on a dime.” “Chronic illness breeds chronic anxiety” “I realized that writing the personal was the only thing that mattered at that point. And that gave me a purpose for the next few years.” “Answers are necessary, and I need to find answers for myself. ” “Synchronicities do exist.” “Is it really that much of a stretch to think there's at least one level of reality higher than this? I don't think so.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.maryanneohara.com/ (Maryanne's website) https://instagram.com/maryanneohara?utm_medium=copy_link (Maryanne's Instagram)

This week's very special guest is Michelle Lepp, a fully accredited NASM personal trainer and 500 hour yoga instructor with an emphasis in yoga therapeutics whose passion is helping others improve their physical and mental health. Michelle is also a cancer survivor, and today she shares her inspiring phoenix tale of how she was faced with her cancer diagnosis just weeks into her marriage, was unwilling to go down with her illness, and ultimately found the strength to become the powerful mother and yoga therapist she is today. Michelle starts the conversation with the story of her cancer diagnosis and how she battled with the side effects that came with chemotherapy. She discusses how she was able to detach herself from her illness and also overcome her fear of starting her family amidst other illnesses. She also explains how she got into yoga therapy with the intention to help others, and, as the episode draws to a close, shares why she would love to meet Idina Menzel. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Michelle's life Michelle's reaction after her diagnosis Battling with the side effects of chemotherapy The impacts of Michelle's diagnosis on her new marriage Focusing on work rather than her illness Transitioning into the health and wellness industry Becoming a yoga therapist after an emotional reckoning The impact of a great support system Overcoming the fear of starting a family Michelle's experience with thyroid diseases Releasing emotions physically The person Michelle would most love to meet Quotes: “You had to read through like all 87 million things that could possibly go wrong in your body.” “All I kept thinking is ‘ Oh my God, his mom just passed away a couple of years ago, and now his wife of two weeks has cancer.' ” “Something about that moment was just like, the light shining on me like, 'Wait a minute, I am no longer a cancer patient, I can walk away from this, and made me be able to look back and acknowledge the experience and acknowledge, yes, there was definitely a chance of a different outcome.” “I am not my lymphoma and I can grow and do something with that experience.” “During this pregnancy, I had moments of ‘What if I'm not here forever for the two of them?' ” “Find something in your life that makes you feel like 'you' or 'normal', and find a way to continue to incorporate that into your daily, weekly, monthly routine.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.michellelaurenmovement.com/ (MichelleLaurenMovement)

This week's episode of Phoenix Tales contains descriptions and discussion of sexual abuse and trauma. Listener discretion is advised. In today's episode, Yuliana is joined by Gina de la Chesnaye, who shares her phoenix tale of surviving parental sexual abuse to become a humanitarian worker with traumatized communities. In her work, Gina draws on her own painful past to teach these communities how not only to survive their traumas but to thrive beyond the boundaries set by their experiences. She is founder and director of The Nachan Project, an NGO that brings mindfulness-based practices to the women and children living in the Katwe and Kisenyi slums of Kampala, Uganda. Gina opens the conversation by discussing the sexual abuse she experienced at the hands of her father from the age of eleven. She speaks about burying those memories until they resurfaced after her father's death and recognizing the ripple effects of his abuse on her lifestyle and relationships. She also reflects on mothering as a trauma survivor, how her experiences shaped her parenting, and the importance of breaking intergenerational cycles of abuse, including by caring for her father at the end of his life and discussing her trauma with her daughters. Gina then shares how practicing Buddhism and yoga have allowed her to use her body as a tool and resource for regulating her nervous system and emotions and gain a different perspective on her trauma. She also speaks about using that perspective to share skills and tools with other survivors, particularly in her work with women and children living in the slums of Uganda. Finally, the episode closes with Gina choosing her future self as the one person throughout time she would like the chance to sit down with, to thank her for inspiring her. Episode Highlights: The challenging events that have redirected the course of Gina's life Suffering sexual abuse at the hands of her father Unlocking buried memories after her father's death The ripple effects of experiencing abuse Recreating a pattern of dysregulation in her adult relationships Mothering as a trauma survivor Breaking intergenerational cycles of abuse Practicing Buddhism Putting her experiences in a different perspective through sharing practice Feeling free after her father's death Discovering her daughter's sexual abuse Working with abused women and children in the Katwe slums of Kampala, Uganda One person Gina would go back in time to sit with Quotes: “We're in so much pain, we don't know how to handle it, we're children. And so we hide it. And there's also a lot of shame. And I think that if more and more people talked about it, which they're starting to do, people like myself would have been able to find help.” “He was, you know, he was my father, and I adored him. And that's why it's so, so difficult, especially for survivors of incest. The person that you love is the one that tends to hurt you the most. That's incredibly confusing and painful, and it's an utter form of betrayal.” “I had a lot of anger, and I took it out often by, like, hitting doors or walls. I never hurt anyone else. Still, to this day, I use my anger to fuel me to help other people.” “When you're consistently dysregulated, let's say working with a lot of anxiety or depression, or if you're working with anxiety and depression all in the course of one day, those are usually the effects of having a nervous system that's been tweaked by traumatic events.” “A lot of people that I've worked with, even including myself, the concept of being happy is so unfamiliar, and we're not used to it, that we can sometimes push that away, because our nervous system is just like, 'what is that?'” “Even now, to this day, as a woman and as a survivor of sexual abuse, I am enraged that it still happens, and I'm enraged that my children have to deal with it. And there's nothing I can do about it.” “I recognized as well that it wasn't just that I was breaking intergenerational...

Today's guest is Ellen Greenberg. a designer and the owner and director of Quick Culture, a global, art tour and cultural travel company. Among her other roles, Ellen has also been an instructor at the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising, has guest lectured at UCLA, holds Docent Program certificates at both The Getty Center and LACMA, and is the author of Inside Chocolate, a pictorial art book. In this moving episode, she shares her phoenix tale of how she realized she was meant to be more than just a wife and a mother, and how that became a catalyst for her divorce. Notwithstanding, Ellen never quit and her incredible story here today is one that is sure to inspire and motivate. She begins by discussing her first divorce as the challenging event that reshaped her life. As a result of this brutal and difficult split in the midst of the 1970s Women's Movement, Ellen picked up her life post-divorce and moved 3000 miles to LA to start over. She discusses being a single mother before remarrying, which brought its own struggles, as well as her  second divorce. She talks about the self doubt she experienced and why she decided never to make one thing the most important in her life. An avid fan of Mark Twain, Ellen finishes by sharing that she would like to have a sit down with him to ask him questions about his works. Episode Highlights: The challenging event that redirected the course of Ellen's life Ellen's difficult divorce Moving to LA and starting a new job The emotional impact of the divorce on Ellen's kids Ellen's challenges in her new marriage and second divorce Battling self-doubt A sit-down with Mark Twain Quotes: “That was the worst thing I ever went through. He didn't want the marriage to end. He tried to do everything nasty...even to the point of saying that he was going to commit suicide if I left him.” “I was driven, wanting to succeed.” “I finally came to the conclusion that I didn't pick them. They picked me and I agreed.” “I was never going to let one thing be the most important thing in my life.” “Don't make anything that important.” “I'm not Superwoman. I'm only human. And I don't know, I do the best I can.” Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.quickculture.com/ (Quick Culture)

Yolanda Colon, an executive in the finance industry, joins Yuliana today to share the tragic story of the stillborn death of her son and also how she found the strength and courage to take back her life after the brutal end of her 24-year marriage. Her story is one of courage and self-awareness which, as you will hear, has made her the phoenix that she is today. Yolanda begins by sharing the events that redirected the course of her life - grieving her stillborn son and experiencing a divorce. She then delves into the events that surrounded her son's death and the sad postpartum experience that followed. Yolanda also discusses the fear she experienced when she became pregnant again after the death of her son and how she was able to overcome it, as well as her divorce and going to therapy. She leaves us with words of wisdom on how and why to set boundaries and also to take back our power and forgive ourselves. The episode concludes with Yolanda identifying the one person she would love to go back in time to speak with, Maya Angelou, who inspires her with a quote about going beyond surviving and thriving.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging event that redirected the course of Yolanda's life -   A sad postpartum experience -   Grieving with her family by her side -   Reliving the experience with another baby -   The courage it took to overcome her fear -   Experiencing a brutal divorce and seeking therapy -   Healing through the pain -   The importance of setting boundaries -   Advice to women going through a divorce -   One person Yolanda would go back in time to speak with   Quotes: “He just wasn't meant for this life. I accepted that.”   “We go through nine months of pregnancy, and we get a beautiful gift at the end. And I left the hospital without a gift, that was gut-wrenching and difficult for me.” “Life is going to throw you curveballs. So I had to grieve the loss of my son in the same way that I had to grieve the recent abrupt ending of my marriage.” “I believe vulnerability is courage.” “At the end of the day, my daughters don't need me to save them. They need to see me save myself and thrive.” “I am taking active steps to live the life that I want to live.” “No one can take your power away from you. I let that happen. I've forgiven myself and it won't happen again.” “We all hold to the fantasy life, ‘What could I have done differently?' And the fact of the matter is nothing. No one can go back and change anything. We can only change what happens in the future. ” “In my marriage, I felt that I wasn't enough. But I was enough, and I am enough, and I will always be enough.” “Boundaries are not meant to offend anyone. They are meant to respect our feelings because every woman deserves peace and safety.” “This chapter of my life is called ‘Make room for lightness, make room for abundance, make room for what is meant for me with ease and flow.'” “We're not raised in comfort. We are made of stuff that should have broken us but didn't. We are not formed with ease and grace. We are made of fire in storms.” “My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)

What does it take to nurse a child with special needs? Author, shoemaker, and health advocate Christina Chiu knows just what it takes as her son was born with a rare syndrome. She joins Yuliana today to share her inspiring phoenix tale on how she takes on the challenges that come her way and how she continues to do what it takes to give her son the best life possible. Christina starts the conversation by discussing the event that reshaped her life — mothering her son who was born with a rare medical condition. She talks about how she dealt with her sense of hopelessness when her son was in the NICU and how she has grown to be more spiritual, embracing a mathematical idea of God. She then delves into her drive for more people to know their story, writing a memoir detailing her experiences as a result, and about dealing with uncertainties in the future. The episode rounds off with Christina identifying one person she would travel back in time to speak with, her grandmother, to ask her how she had so much courage - a level of courage that, as we hear today, has undeniably been passed on to Christina herself.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging events that have redirected the course of Christina's life -   A rare syndrome rears its head -   Handling the sense of hopelessness during her son's surgeries -   A childhood memory that sparked a realization -   A mathematical idea of God -   Starting a memoir about her experience -   Navigating the sibling dynamic between her sons -   Dealing with uncertainties of the future -   One person Christina would go back in time to speak with   Quotes: “For all the mothers who are going to hear this, I think it's so important that, when you feel like something's not right, you may not have the actual proof that something's not right, but you should follow up on it.” “We are so limited in the few senses that we have, that for us to be able to comprehend God is just out of our realm of understanding.” “The best and the most truthful things are moments - whether it be something you create in art or literature or whatever - are in those transcendent moments.” “He's always that kid who notices when someone's being left out. He has this way of bringing light into the room, and I think I'm just lucky to be around him.” “A lot of it is approaching your fears and learning to not be afraid and to constantly stretch yourself.” “How do women not feel afraid? How does anyone not feel afraid?”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.christinachiu.org/ (Christina's Homepage)

Kathy Casey sits down with Yuliana today to share her own phoenix tale of how she reinvented herself and followed her passion after losing a part of herself to her divorce and forced retirement. Both of these life events naturally had significant impacts upon Kathy and the path her life was following, Through courage and compassion, Kathy overcame these obstacles and today shares how this has fueled her to become the woman she is today. Kathy begins the conversation by talking about her divorce as one of the events that reshaped her life, from meeting her ex-husband and enjoying a whirlwind romance in Italy to how she had to face some realizations after the divorce. She also discusses the other event that shaped her life - her forced retirement at 56 - and realizing that she based her identity heavily on her profession. She then delves into finding and following a new passion and how she plans to settle upon retirement. The episode ends with Kathy talking about the one song that resonates with her life, a song about gratitude and compassion.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging events that redirected the course of Kathy's life -   Questioning her judgment after making a life-changing decision -   Falling in love with a man and a city -   Experiencing the impacts of forced retirement -   The realizations after her divorce -   How Kathy defined herself by a job and title -   Following a new passion -   Settling after retirement -   Having compassion for yourself and others -   One song that resonates with Kathy's life Quotes: “I was walking in a coma through my own life.” “It was a difficult marriage and a difficult divorce, but I think both did set me up for what I would become in later life.” “All my life my professional work was anchored in writing, but I was always kind of a pen for hire. And now I finally I'm writing for myself.” “One of the things that I feel like I've learned, and I'm continuing to try to learn in my work with animals and animal organizations, is compassion.” “A lot of us have difficulty showing ourselves compassion.” “Sometimes when you don't know where to turn, or which way to move, the only thing to do is just to stay out in the world.” “I do have a tendency to isolate like a wounded animal.  I'll lick my boots in the corner... When I lost my job, not really knowing what to do next, I just stayed in contact. Just stay out in the world and something will drop into your lap.”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.part-timeitalian.com/ (Kathy's Blog)

Joining Yuliana today is Sari Velar, a yoga teacher and yoga therapist, to share her incredible phoenix tale. Over 20 years ago, Sari turned to yoga as an alternative therapy after a life-threatening cancer diagnosis and a subsequent battle with an eating disorder and addiction. These days, Sari facilitates classes at local cancer and mental health treatment centers, hospitals, and with Warrior Flow TV, whose Foundation she also works at as the Director of Training and Education. As you will hear today, Sari credits the struggles she has worked through in her life with shaping her to become the remarkable woman she is today. Sari begins the conversation by sharing the event that reshaped the course of her life - getting cancer at 19 while dealing with eating disorders - including the events that occurred during and after her cancer treatments and how these affected her illness. She also describes the social stigma she faced at this struggling time in her life as well as finding yoga during her later years and going on to become a yoga therapist to help others who have had experiences similar to hers. The episode rounds off with Sari talking about past historical figures she would love to spend an afternoon with - her parents when they were younger - to have honest conversations that would pave the way to healing.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging events that redirected the course of Sari's life -   Battling with cancer and an eating disorder at 19 -   Sari discusses having to grow faster following her diagnosis -   Experiencing and coping with the social stigma in college -   Falling into alcohol addiction -   Getting into rehab -   How to quiet the inner critic -   Seeing her diagnosis and illnesses through a new lens -   Finding out the root cause of her eating disorder -   Making the transition to the yoga profession -   Coming face to face with her mortality -   A historical figure Sari would love to spend an afternoon with   Quotes: “I've always struggled with food and had a very interesting, strange relationship with my own body and appearance.” “Parts of me matured incredibly, and I think a lot of parts of me stayed stagnant.” “When you are battling an eating disorder and an addiction, it's kind of in charge, no matter how much you want to mature. It was always at the helm and in control and really making a lot of my guiding decisions and principles.” “Trauma doesn't need to necessarily be a car accident or an act of violence. It can be an experience or a period of time where you're just not able to function.” “The notion of recovery from anything - eating disorder, substance abuse, whatever it is - it's a lifelong process.” “I'm thankful every day that I work within the same realm and universe. It has inadvertently become part of my healing process.” “The focus has been a lot more about not looking at it through the lens of my body betrayed me, but my body had to go through this situation because maybe it was in so much excruciating pain from a lot of other things that had happened. And that was just the physical manifestation of it.” “Everything that has happened to me was necessary, 150% necessary.  These experiences have been my teachers, my guide. I would not be the person who's talking to you right now had I not gone through those experiences.” “What society prescribes to you as being happy and fulfilled, having the nice house, having the nice car, having the 401k, working that corporate job and whatnot, that's not what I wanted. That's what I set out to do to make others happy, but that's not what filled me internally.” “My experience is my experience, it doesn't have to be projected onto another human being. What it does allow me to have is to create that space, that vessel of compassion and understanding.” “There's a certain healing aspect to being open and raw and vulnerable. And I...

Roni Jackson, Co-Founder of Red Flag Mania, joins Yuliana today to share her inspiring phoenix tale. Roni identifies and expands upon two inflection points in her life that altered her trajectory considerably. The first, losing her mother at a young age, and the second, being forced to give up her long time career, both had significant impacts upon her life, helping to shape her and become the resilient and courageous phoenix she is today. Toni begins by discussing these events that redirected the course of her life, describing the loneliness and isolation she felt growing up in a new household after she lost her mom and how that influenced the way she raised her own children. Regarding her second challenging event, being let go from a company to which she had devoted a huge part of her life, Roni talks about starting a new career and how she had become a resilient force ever since the death of her mom. She also details how she created a strong family unit in a bid to dispel that fear of loneliness and isolation which she carried into adulthood. The episode comes to a close with Roni sharing the one song that truly resonates with her life - a song about finding her space and happy place in this vast world. Finding courage and resilience from not only one, but two pivotal moments in her life, Roni's phoenix tale here today is one that you will not soon forget.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging events that redirected the course of Roni's life -   Life after her mother's passing -   How losing her mother impacted the raising of Roni's children -   The end to a 10-year career -   Starting out on a new path -   The resiliency from losing one's parent at a young age -   Carrying fears in adulthood -   Creating a strong nuclear family unit -   Experiencing a fear of mortality -   A great gift born out of love -   One song that resonates with Roni's life   Quotes: “Being a motherless daughter is a very challenging place to be. Particularly as you begin your teenage years, you are left without anyone understanding exactly who you are.” “Not having my mother truly impacted who I am and how I think and even, I think, my devotion to my own children.” “I had given so much to a company that had given me so little. And not only that, but I think I defined myself by the company, and by what I was doing.” “Resiliency is certainly a part of the fabric of my being.” “The problem was I gave a job half of myself. ” “I learned that I have to prioritize what is most important to me, and always put that at the forefront.”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://redflagmania.com/ (Red Flag Mania)

Functional medicine practitioner, Dr. Susan Lovelle, joins Yuliana today for a truly fascinating conversation. Currently the Founder and CEO of Premiere Wellness, Dr. Susan spent 14 years as a professional ballet dancer after which she became a physician specializing in plastic surgery. In her current role with Premiere Wellness, she is thrilled to now be supporting women to heal from the inside out. In this week's episode, she shares her tale of how she made life changes and regained control of her health after landing in the hospital multiple times, and how these events propelled her into finding a new purpose in helping others and making a difference in their lives. Dr. Susan begins by recounting the event that redirected the course of her life - an illness that landed her in the intensive care unit three times. She then talks about her experience as the only plastic surgeon for miles and miles where she lived, how this took a toll on her health, and her subsequent commitment to make dietary changes and practice yoga.  Dr. Susan also delves into the health disparity found in African American communities and how she started a functional medicine practice to help others achieve wellness in a holistic manner. The episode rounds off with her advice regarding how to make changes in your life - listen, let go, and live.  As Dr. Susan states, the song “I am not Finished” resonates with her life, a fact that is made abundantly clear through her courageous and inspiring phoenix tale here today.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging event that redirected the course of Dr. Susan's life -   Dr. Susan's experience as a plastic surgeon -   Finding herself in intensive care -   Making changes after a relapse -   Transitioning from plastic surgery to functional medicine -   Exploring the health  disparity in the African American community -   Starting a functional medicine practice -   Steps to mastering your energy at any age -   How to go about making a change in your life -   The one song that resonates with Dr, Susan's life   Quotes: “I pushed myself to where I ended up in the intensive care unit three times in the space of one year.” “It's time to stop believing that I can do everything and be everything to everyone. It was time to start taking care of myself.” “When I first decided I wanted to go into medicine, it was because I wanted to make a difference in people's lives, and I just realized that, you know, I can make a better difference long term by doing functional medicine.” “Food is a very important part of the culture of African Americans.” “Listen, let go, and live.”  “Sometimes … you realize that this is not right for you at this particular point, that you might need to let go a little so that you can then reach out for something that's better. ” “Whatever it is that floats your boat, that makes and brings joy into your life, is what you need to be doing, especially at this stage in life.”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.premierewellness.com/ (Premiere Wellness Homepage)

Chiropractor, cookbook author, food blogger and healthy living proponent, Dr. Karen Lee, joins Yuiliana today to share her story of how she navigated being a child immigrant in a new country and having to take on the responsibility of caring for her brothers at a young age. This caring nature, developed over the years, helped form Dr. Karen's love of caring for people which manifested itself through the work to which she has devoted her life. Dr. Karen begins the conversation by delving into the event that redirected the course of her life - immigrating as a young child – and describing the events that followed after her father left Korea for America to seek out a better life for his family. The burden of caring for the family fell to Dr. Karen and her mom and, she, being the eldest, had to care for her brothers. She describes arriving in America and feeling out of place as she couldn't understand the new language., discusses navigating different careers - from real estate to getting an MBA degree to chiropractic care to food blogging and writing cookbooks. The episode concludes with Dr, Karen sharing the song that resonates with her life - classical music to strike a balance and spark the hope and courage she clearly possesses. Truly one who has made the care and nurturing of others a priority from a young age, Dr. Karen recounts her noble and inspirational life story here today – rendering this yet another ‘must listen' episode of the Phoenix Tales podcast.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging event that redirected the course of Dr. Karen's life -   Taking the reins of caring for her family at a young age -   Arriving in America with high expectations -   Feeling out of place in a new country -   Navigating different careers -   Getting into food blogging -   The one song that describes Dr. Karen's life   Quotes: “Korea has one of the highest suicide rates for young people because it's so gruesome.” “I had this duty of a head of the household at a young age.” “I blacked out for like two months. And I didn't have a life, basically, because I really don't remember what people said to me, because I didn't understand it.” “I really felt like I'm in the wrong country, or I'm in somebody else's home. I'm not part of this country. And feeling like I'm going to go home. ” “It pulled me out of that fantasy that everything is perfect.” “I always felt like family was everything. So I had to do my part.” “I really enjoyed taking care of people, and I think I was meant to take care of people. ”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) https://www.instagram.com/drkarenslee/ (Dr. Karen's Instagram) https://www.drkarenslee.com/ (Dr. Karen's homepage)

Joining Yuliana this week is Coco Cohen, a leading fitness professional based in New York. Coco tells her courageous story of giving up her daughter for adoption to give her daughter the wonderful life that she, herself, was unable to provide. As any mother would testify, this has to be the most painful sacrifice a parent could make, and today, Coco reveals how she made this supremely difficult decision out of love and selflessness – a decision not for herself but for her child. She begins the conversation by recounting the event that redirected the course of her life - giving up her baby for adoption. Coco then courageously speaks about why and how the heart-breaking decision was made, and about maintaining a relationship with her daughter over the years. She also discusses being open-minded about having the uncomfortable conversation of “why” with her daughter when she gets older, and the episode comes to a close with Coco identifying the one song that resonates with her life- a song about choosing our lives and letting our scars show. Possibly the most courageous story shared on Phoenix Tales to date, Coco's account of her life-altering sacrifice here today is a moving one that you will not soon forget.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging event that redirected the course of Coco's life -   Making the tough decision of giving up her child -   Going about the adoption process -   Coco speaks about meeting her daughter after two years -   Having the uncomfortable discussion of “why” when the time comes -   Coco discusses facing the reactions of others after making her decision -   The one song that describes Coco's life   Quotes: “I wanted my children to have the best I could offer for them, and that meant, if it wasn't going to be me, it was going to be a family that I knew.” “I've never regretted my choice.” “She was having a life that I wanted for her, that I knew that if I had tried to do it, I wouldn't have been able to give her this wonderful life.” “That made me want my daughter to know me as a person. And to make sure that I was a person outside of just being a mother.”    Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)

Losing a parent has a devastating effect, and losing the parent to suicide can bring compounding grief and anger. On the show today, Liz Bailey, a solicitor living in London, joins Yuliana to discuss losing her father to suicide and how the work she put into dealing with it gave her the courage to step outside the shadow cast by this tragedy and forge a solid path to an inspiring llife filled with purpose. The conversation begins with Liz describing the event that reshaped her life - the tragic death of her father to suicide - as well as finding out about her father's depression after his death, dealing with the immense rage she had towards him, and forging a path to forgiveness. She then delves into how this event caused a shift in her relationship with her mother and brother, her own struggles with depression, and her strong resolve to break the generational curse of depression that seemed to hover over her family. Liz also discusses the importance of raising the emotional inner child we all have as humans into emotional adults. The episode comes to a close with Liz describing the one song that resonates with her life - a song that fills her with great joy.   Episode Highlights: -   The tragic event that redirected the course of Liz's life -   Finding out about her father's depression -   Facing her rage -   The shift in the relationship with her mother -   Processing the guilt around suicide -   Liz speaks about her own struggles with depression -   Nature vs nurture -   Breaking the family “curse” -   Raising your emotional inner child -   The one song that resonates with Liz's life   Quotes: “Anger is actually a normal part of grieving, even when someone doesn't commit suicide, because you're angry with someone for leaving you behind.” “Grief is always complicated, and loss is always complicated. But with a suicide, you have such a high degree of anger that actually makes it, in a way, more difficult to cope with your loss and to feel the sadness, because sometimes the anger is just so overwhelming.” “That's a place of such dark hopelessness that I hope no one you love ever goes to that place ever again.” “27 is the age at which you basically have to stop blaming your parents for all the shit that's gone wrong in your life, and you have to take responsibility for it, and decide how you want your life to be as a proper adult.” “No one is immune to feelings of fear and loss and loneliness and self-doubt.” “Don't focus on the stuff that you didn't achieve today, because you can achieve that stuff tomorrow.” “If you spend your whole life looking for the big moments of joy, you miss the small moments of joy, and life is a series of small moments of joy.”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook)

Joining Yuliana on the show this week is Meta Wagner, the author of What's Your Creative Type: Harness the Power of Your Artistic Personality, and an instructor of creative and communications writing at Emerson College. In addition to her writing and teaching careers, Meta has held executive positions in the marketing and public relations fields, receiving multiple awards from professional organizations for her work. In today's episode, Meta recounts her tale of losing her mother as a teen and how that shaped her into creating the happy and purposeful life she desired. She starts by describing the sudden loss of her mother at the age of 17 - the event that redirected her life - and the changes that soon followed her mother's death including her father remarrying and her starting out in college. She goes on to talk about marrying young and quitting law school in pursuit of something that sparked her creative side, and how the loss of her mother influenced the raising of her son. Meta also delves into how she transitioned from a PR career into writing, starting a new career at a later age, and launching her teaching career. Meta and Yuliana talk about Meta's book, What's Your Creative Type, and the episode comes to a close with Meta describing one song that resonates with her life - a song of joy, awe, and sunshine.   Episode Highlights: -   The challenging event that redirected the course of Meta's life -   Rapid changes that followed losing her mother -   Starting out in college after the fateful tragedy -   Meta describes how the loss of her mother affected her relationship -   How Meta got into Public Relations and transitioned into a Writing Career -   Becoming a mother after losing one -   Starting a new career at a later age -   Having a childlike view -   Meta's path to teaching -   Helping creative people dig deep -   One song that resonates with Meta's life   Quotes: “I wanted to keep busy because I didn't really want to deal with the reality of what had happened.” “I think part of it was because I didn't know I was longing for connection with someone and longing for my own family in a sense.” “It felt like it took every little ounce of creativity in me and just squeezed it out.” “Sometimes when you're with somebody like that, it kind of gives you permission to fall apart a little bit.” “You become aware of mortality, in a way, faster than other people.” “I had to work to get back to who I was.” “What's your creative type?” “Writers are the most neurotic among the different artists. And the things we say to ourselves are so awful and so damaging, and so absurd and ridiculous.”   Links: https://www.yulianakimgrant.com/phoenix-tales (Phoenix Tales Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/yulianakimgrantofficial/ (Phoenix Tales on Instagram) https://open.spotify.com/show/1heIpPMsG6HbXXIDLmAnEe (Phoenix Tales on Spotify) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=322043276201679 (Phoenix Tales on Facebook) http://www.metawagner.com/ (Meta's Homepage) https://www.instagram.com/creativelymeta/ (Meta's Instagram) Meta's email