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“Uncertainty creates fear, fear create anger” -- Lara Currie Out of control Karen's are the poster people for the rise in bad behavior. Uncertainty causes fear, and fear causes anger. All too often that anger is vented in the wrong venue. Customers rage at service workers, policies trigger push back, and those who want things to ‘go back to normal' (whatever that is) are walking around in a heightened emotional state that your staff has to deal with. In today's episode, what ONE THING you can do to tame those unruly clients and diffuse the anger that your clients are expressing Why people are more disrespectful Is incivility on the rise? How do you show empathy when they are a jerk What key phrases will work to calm a tense situation Work with Lara: Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Resources: 10 TIPS for Dealing with Difficult People Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
We spend a lot of time with the people we work with. Whether in person or online friendships form, and leadership often tries to encourage a sense of camaraderie with staff. Without knowing it, this can create strife between coworkers without meaning to. When does camaraderie become toxic? With a nod to systems theory, we can learn how and why what is intended as 'team building' may, in fact, grow animosity. Work with Lara: Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Resources: 10 TIPS for Dealing with Difficult People Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Do you ever wonder how a workplace turns toxic? It doesn't happen all at once, and it doesn't happen in a vacuum. Like a pot that slowly boils there are a lot of steps along the way where you can stop the chain reaction of events before the workplace turns toxic. When blame, exaggeration, and generalizations are used in a conflict communication gets lost. Generalizing is another way to label and dismiss a person or a topic. Exaggeration inflames what may otherwise be no big deal, into a conflict. When identifying errors turns into a blame game, that is where the conversation ends. Tune in and discover what to be on the lookout for to make sure that your workplace doesn't slide down the slippery slope and wind up TOXIC. What you'll hear on today's episode: Its by inches we travel miles What to be on the lookout for How to address minor issues before they become major Intergenerational communication Toxic workplaces Where it all starts How coworkers make it worse Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Resources: 10 TIPS for Dealing with Difficult People Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
On top of everything else that you have had to deal with this past year, now loneliness is on the rise, and the impact of loneliness on you and the work you do is impactful. Douglas Nemecek, MD, chief medical officer for behavioral health at Cigna says that the impact of loneliness on your health is equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day and is possibly worse than obesity and that isolated people risk having a significantly shorter life span. I don't think it's any surprise that any stress on your emotions impacts you physically, as the saying goes, your body keeps the score of your emotions. Contact with others is not connection, while you may interact with a lot of people, that doesn't necessarily mean that you are connecting with them. On today's episode, signs of loneliness, what to watch out for, and what to do about it. What you'll hear on today's episode: Signs of loneliness that you might not be aware of Mask emotions and their purpose What to watch out for What the heck is going on What next? Healthy alternatives What you need to combat loneliness Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Resources: 10 TIPS for Dealing with Difficult People Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
This is a juicy episode filled with the way's that you can use stories in your everyday work life, from the boardroom to the stage. Carol and I talk about everything from our personal struggles and successes to the DNA of the feminine, from speaker hijackers to why Emma should stop watching Law and Order SVU. Carol tells us how she uses the three-act story structure and the Hero's journey when working with clients. There are lots of free giveaways on dealing with conflict and a strategic speaking guide. What you'll hear in this podcast: Stories help us see ourselves in others experiences Stories help us ‘rewrite history' so that we can see a better way We don't know how our personal story can impact others and the work that we do Throughout history it was dangerous for Women to speak their truth How recognizing patterns can help your storytelling Do an after-action review post speaking engagement, guest podcast episode, board meeting etc. Practice and repeat you message as often as possible to become more comfortable Visualize your environment Use skills practice and reflection to become a better speaker Resources: 10 TIPS for Dealing with Difficult People Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Work with Lara: Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Everyone, at one point in their life, has experienced a compliment that did not sit right. Either it was way too personal, or it felt a little backhanded. That's why we're tackling whether or not compliments are toxic! When we break down compliments, we can see that it depends on a variety of factors; Who is giving the compliment, the context, and the motive. When it comes to genuine compliments, you know it when you see it. What you'll hear on today's episode: Compliments Gaslighting and Narcissism Genuine compliments Overly familiar compliment Sideways compliments Backhanded compliments Awkward compliments Fishing compliments Toxic or Not? Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Squad © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Do you have difficulty standing up for yourself? If so, this episode of One Broken Mom will be a breath of fresh air. Ameé speaks with Lara Currie, corporate trainer and high-conflict communication expert, about some of the reasons why it can be difficult to feel confident in your own voice. She then offers ways to overcome these obstacles and communicate more confidently in both work and personal situations. You'll learn how to identify the traits that are holding you back from speaking up - like perfectionism, fear of confrontation, or lack of self-awareness - as well as what steps you can take right now to start feeling more confident.Resources: https://difficulthappens.com/Links to buy The Fearless Woman's Guide to Starting a BusinessAmazon (Audio, Print, Kindle Versions): https://amzn.to/3daO7nABarnes and Noble- https://bit.ly/FearlessWomansGuideBookshop- https://bit.ly/FearlessWomanBookshopVisit https://www.ameequiriconi.com/ for more articles about self-help, healing from trauma, leadership, business, and more!
"Knowledge is when you learn something new every day." We learn learn learn all day long but do we take enough time to apply? I love to learn, and learning the concepts is one thing, but implementing is another. This brings us to the one thing that we all need that we cannot do without. Something paramount to implementing better ways of communication, and that is empathy. What is empathy to you? Empathy is the ability to understand what other people feel emotionally and see things from their perspective. Empathy is important because it is a precursor to any conversation. However, there is more to empathy than meets the eye, especially for business leaders. What you'll hear on today's episode: Learning Implementing Empathy Will Smith: Fault vs. Responsibility Empathy and Accountability Ways to show empathy Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types You Tube: Will Smith - Fault vs. Responsibility Squad © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
What kind of energy do you give off? Do you find yourself expressing more masculine attributes or feminine? This concept of masculine and feminine has been around a lot, and we are beginning to see it take hold in the entrepreneurial and small business fields. Someone who is more focused and driven is seen to have stronger masculine traits, while more caring and creative is seen as having more feminine traits. Discussing masculine and feminine energies is based on a continuum, yin and yang. People are made up of different traits, and when we say "masculine energy" or "feminine energy" in this context, it does not mean male and female, yet these attributes and expressions are often used in a male/female way. In this episode of Difficult Happens, we tackle the concept of masculine and feminine energy and how that impacts your interpersonal and professional relationships. What you'll hear on today's episode: What is Masculine and Feminine The Squad membership Yin and Yang Masculine traits Feminine traits Where the concepts break down Tone policing Communication Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Squad © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever found yourself engulfed in a project, focused on the little details like font or style, and before you realize it, hours have passed? Guess what? You were distracted. Distracted does not always mean bouncing from one task to another or getting lost on Facebook when you should be working on a report. You can be hyper-focused on a task but be focused on something that does not serve your end goal. In the end, it doesn't matter why you were distracted. The effect is the same. Amber Hawley from the Distracted Entrepreneur Podcast joins us to talk about her personal and professional experience helping distracted entrepreneurs and those with ADHD. With the happenings of the last year, a lot of people are distracted. Many women are finding it difficult to focus with the children at home more, and the change in routine leading to a greater number of burnouts. In this episode, we break down systems and structures, boxes and labels, and discuss ways to combat burnout. What you'll hear on today's episode: Being distracted and ADD What distraction looks like Buttons and triggers Personality Traits Types of ADD Time-Blindness Shiny Object Syndrom Breaks and burnout Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Squad Mentioned in the Podacast: 16 Personalities The Power of When - Michael Breus 7 Types of ADD Psychology in Seattle - Kirk Honda Guest Resources: The Easily Distracted Entrepreneur © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
In a world that is increasingly growing more visual, how do you keep up? Younger and younger generations are becoming more socially competent in understanding differences in the "true-self" and "Instagram-self," but what about information spread online? 86% of people are now what is known as a "visual learner." Infographics and other visual aids are a great way to absorb information. However, as we look at older generations, we see a problem where we have not kept up on our education with the vast evolution of the internet and are trusting of data visualizations that might have completely false data. Amy Balliett of Killer Visual Strategies joins us today to discuss what you need to know as a consumer, entrepreneur, marketer, and leader. From best practices to statistics, this is one podcast you don't want to miss. What you'll hear on today's episode: Social media competency TikTok Recommended tools and websites Mixed Fonts Stock Content Twitter star vs. heart Augmented Reality Amy Balliett Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Guest Resources: Killer Visual Strategies Amy Balliett LinkedIn Book- Killer Visual Strategies: Engage Any Audience, Improve Comprehension, and Get Amazing Results Using Visual Communication Websites: Canva Dribbble Netflix Shows: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Hanna © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Do you consider yourself a loyal person? Do you expect loyalty from your friends? On this episode of Toxic or Not, we are tackling loyalty. Many see loyalty as a black and white issue. You're either loyal or you're not, when in reality, there is a lot of room for the shades of gray. I conducted a (very unscientific) poll gathering information on whether people perceived loyalty as a positive or a negative, and the results were surprising. Older generations were most likely to have a positive association with the concept of expecting loyalty from others. In comparison, younger generations had a very negative association with the word. There is a dark side to loyalty. Here is what you need to know about when loyalty turns toxic. What you'll hear on today's episode: What is Loyalty Generational Poll When loyalty is toxic When loyalty is not toxic Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types YouTube © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Who likes to talk about money? Money and finances can be a minefield. How much should I charge? What are my costs? Do I really need this? There is a lot to contemplate! There is a lot of advice out there, stalwarts preach that we should put money into an IRA or 401K, that we should do this or don't do that, and not question it. But know what? That might not be the best route for you. It's okay to trust your gut and ask more questions! Lesley Batson of Rebel Rock Wealth joins us to discuss women, money, and business. Including myths around these topics that will surprise you. Learn the whole truth about money and how you can get your money to work for you and the answers may surprise you. We'll discuss math anxiety, triggers, and the six wealth destroyers you should watch out for. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Lesley Batson Women and Money Math Anxiety Triggers Pricing Price-it-right calculator Stereotypes How to keep more money 6 wealth destroyers Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Guest Resources: Checkout Lesley’s website Rebel Rock Wealth Price It Right Calculator SchoolHouse Rock: How a bill becomes a law © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever worked someplace and only realized, looking back, that it was a pretty toxic place? Sometimes figuring out that we are working in a toxic company, or with toxic people is difficult. So ask yourself, are you being treated unfairly, or are you just needing "thicker skin"? (spoiler alert - if it’s toxic for you, it’s toxic to you) A few weeks ago I saw an SNL Skit that was funny but also a little scary. The skit touched on toxic workplaces, gaslighting, and silencing one's voice through the lens of whiny 20-somethings, i.e.tropes and logical fallacies. What's scary about this is that these things do happen. But, not in the scenario the SNL cast acted out... That's why I'm introducing a new series called "Toxic or Not." We'll discuss all the ad hominem fallacies and whether or not a situation was actually toxic. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: SNL SKIT What is a Trope Ad Hominem Fallacies Toxic or Not series Sketch shows to check out Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Sketch Shows: Baroness Von Sketch Show A Black Lady Sketch Show © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“I do not think that word means what you think it means” -- The princess bride. The term “self care” has joined the ranks of other terms that have been watered down, co-opted, or re-defined to the point that it means nothing. I have noticed a concerning trend with self care, it has been used to manipulate, bully, and has been productized and sold. So I asked my friend and selfcare & resilience coach Stacy Fisher to join me and talk about the topic, and how you can find what works best for you. (without making a purchase!) Remember, feelings are meant to be felt, not used against you to make you feal. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is self care Patterns and Habits The self-care paradox How to spot manipulation The 8 dimensions of self care framework How to identify rhythms Daily rituals How MLM’s use personal development to manipulate Accepting what is Finding your own routine Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Guest Resources: Checkout Stacy’s website The self-care paradox blog post © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever used the phrase "I'm not like other women"? More often than not, we use this phrase to really say, "I'm not like the stereotype that has been placed on women." Spoiler alert - none of us are. Women have been trained to be the caretakers of other people's feelings, and when we deviate from that, especially professionally, it can lead to women being viewed as a "Queen Bee." This myth often portrays strong women as the Miranda type boss from The Devils Wear Prada, which normalizes the behavior. The truth is, there is no evidence that senior women are more or less helpful to junior women than their male counterparts. Why does this myth persist? Not for the reasons you may think. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Are women tougher on other women? The evolution of women in business "When Meanness was Celebrated" by Shirly Li Queen Bee myth Why we view women more harshly How generational life experiences play a role. Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Help@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad: https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ When Meanness Was Celebrated: https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2021/04/scott-rudin/618569/ The immortal and false myth of the workplace queen bee: https://theconversation.com/the-immortal-and-false-myth-of-the-workplace-queen-bee-129680 © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“In order to build a rewarding employee experience, you need to understand what matters to your people.” -- Julie Bevacqua How good are you at reading the room? Do you consider yourself to be a Workplace Meteorologist, someone who is able to read the temperature? Or do you need a little assistance to see the writing on the wall? When working with those in an already heightened emotional state, it is important to have self-awareness and realize when you are being triggered. Defensiveness begets defensiveness. On part two of two, Patti Perez from Persuasion Point Inc and the Drama Free Workplace Podcast joins us to talk about her experience with drama in the workplace and her insights after 20 years of workplace investigations. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Conflict in the workplace What a Workplace Meteorologist is How context can impact situations Over-sharers Healthy workplace cultures Subconscious complicit bias What HR is Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad: https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ Patti Perez - Drama Free Workplace Podcast: https://persuasionpoint.com/podcast/ 164: Drama in the workplace with Patti Perez, part 1 https://difficulthappens.com/164/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“Most misunderstandings in the world could be avoided if people would simply take the time to ask, "What else could this mean?” -- Shannon L. Alder Summary: Drama in the workplace is inevitable. Sometimes situations don't seem fair. How many times have you seen or know of someone who received a promotion or a raise at work and can't help but wonder why? What about being rejected for a position because you didn't fit their "workplace culture"? Patti Perez from Persuasion Point Inc and the Drama Free Workplace Podcast joins us for this first, two-part podcast discussing her experience with workplace drama. Patti has conducted over 1200 workplace investigations over the last 20 years, giving us insight into workplace drama, patterns and themes, and workplace culture. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Patti Perez Dismissal and justification of workplace drama Women in the workplace Personality Types Culture and its different meanings Culture Fit Fairness The meaning of words and what's behind them Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad: https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ Patti Perez - Drama Free Workplace Podcast: https://persuasionpoint.com/podcast/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“Vulnerability sounds like truth and courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness.” -- Brené Brown Opening our true selves and exposing our thoughts, dreams, and shames can be a frightening experience. Trading our comfort for courage and opening ourselves up to public judgement often leads us to a Vulnerability Hangover. The Vulnerability Hangover was coined by Brene Brown to describe the feelings that wash over us after sharing publicly and stem from shame and vulnerability. We subconsciously and continually seek out acceptance, reverting to our primal selves where group survival was critical. That's why showing our vulnerable, true selves can be so frightening. In my TED-style talk with Speaking Your Brand's Thought Leadership Summit, Echos of a free-range childhood, I shared a vulnerable story about a traumatic time in my life and how I reclaimed my power, afterwards, emotions washed over me and led to a Vulnerability Hangover. Here’s how I worked through it, and how you can too. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is vulnerability? The Vulnerability Hangover The courage of being vulnerable Echos of a free-range childhood The cathartic feeling of being vulnerable How to deal with a Vulnerability Hangover Empowerment Pillar Four, Refresh Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Podcast 162 - Refresh with Dysfunctional Affirmations: https://difficulthappens.com/162/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad: https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ Subscribe - 10 Tips on how to deal with difficult people and sticky situations: https://difficulthappens.com/10tips/ Carol Cox - Speaking Your Brand: https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/ Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/ Brene Brown: Listening to Shame: https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame?language=en © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever been scrolling through Facebook or Instagram and see those little affirmation posts? What’s your first reaction? Have you tried them and found that they don't really work for you? You're not alone. Affirmations for self-care, love affirmations, black women empowerment affirmations, etc., are some of the most popular "affirmation for" searches on Google. Why don't you see affirmations for dysfunctional people? Dysfunctional affirmations are for those whose first reaction to seeing motivational quotes is to roll their eyes (figuratively or literally) more often than not, it’s because you were raised in dysfunction. This is where pillar four of the Empowerment Pillar Model comes in; Refresh. Refresh your body, mind, and sense of self. Anyone who has experienced some ‘ish, dealt with a manipulator or breathed air, needs time to repair because your body keeps the score of every emotion you feel. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What are affirmations What refresh means Self-care Toxic positivity What refreshing involves Three dysfunctional affirmations Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email hello@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Podcast 159 - Recognize what’s really going on when Blame is an issue: https://difficulthappens.com/159/ Podcast 160 - Reclaim Your Power; Breaking Up Is Hard To Do: https://difficulthappens.com/160-2/ Podcast 161 - Restore - Essential Boundaries For Bosses https://difficulthappens.com/161-2/ Podcast 139 - When Positivity is Toxic https://difficulthappens.com/139-2/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ Carol Cox - Speaking Your Brand https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/
“Boundaries are a part of self-care. They are healthy, normal, and necessary.” -- Doreen Virtue Do you ever feel like you’re being taken advantage of? A coworker, boss, or even a friend asks more and more of you. It could be anything from your time, work product, or even your attention that they seek and when you tell them no, they keep pushing. You don’t really want to, but you feel pressured, and you say yes anyway because you don’t want to be rude. This is a classic manipulation technique where manipulators will slowly chip away at your boundaries overtime to get the attention they need from you. This is where the third step of my Pillar of Empowerment framework comes in; Restore. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The Empowered Pillar Model What boundaries are The four main types of boundaries The four different boundary levels Micro-boundaries Signs of weak boundaries How guilt plays into boundary breaches Emotional vampires Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Podcast 159 - Recognize what’s really going on when Blame is an issue: https://difficulthappens.com/159/ Podcast 160 - Reclaim Your Power; Breaking Up Is Hard To Do: https://difficulthappens.com/160/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“Our authentic power is found in our truth. This is the place that shows us how to give what is so very good about ourselves.” -- Jeanne McElvaney Now that you can recognize dysfunctional situations and manipulation tactics, What do you do? Well, now you work on reclaiming your power! Out of each of the Four Pillars of Empowerment, reclaiming is probably the most difficult one for people to do. Reclaiming your power, your internal self, space, and your own narrative takes time, and (that often overused word) Intention. Reclaiming comes from practice and learning what works for you! What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The Four Pillars of Empowerment What reclaiming your power means. Story: Sally and Juliette Conflict Personality Types "Shiney" talk. Women Helping Women Fund Tri-Cities. Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Podcast 159 - Recognize what’s really going on when Blame is an issue: https://difficulthappens.com/159/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ Women Helping Women Fund Tri-Cities: http://www.whwftc.org © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“Blame is a clever trickster. At its root, blame is a form of fear that helps us avoid accountability for our lives.” -- Debbie Ford Can’t help but wonder why someone refuses to accept doing something wrong, even something small? When blaming a person or system, your assigning responsibility for a fault or a wrong. However, feelings of fear or embarrassment can cause someone to go on the defensive and try to blameshift. It takes personal growth and development to determine why people act and react the way they do. It takes some guessing and is not always black and white. Difficult Situations can arise with different people in different situations and it can be hard to figure out what scenario you are in and what approach you should take. The Squad is there to help you navigate these situations. The Squad Membership works off the four empowered pillars of recognize, reclaim, restore, and refresh. We act and react in a way for a reason, that is why it is so important to understand why someone is going on the defensive and blame-shifting. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The Empowered Pillar Model What blame is Recognizing blame Types of blame When blame is used Fear, shame, and embarrassment Being shamed Black and white thinking Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Difficult Happens Squad https://difficulthappens.com/squad-membership/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Productivity Straight Talk - Time Management, Productivity and Business Growth Tips
I sit down with speaker and author Lara Currie to discuss productive ways to deal with difficult people, have tough conversations, and navigate conflict in your business. What You’ll Discover In This Episode: ✔ Typical Conflicts That Occur In Business & Tips For Resolving Them ✔ The 4 Different Conflict Personality Types ✔ How To Pull Yourself Back Once You’re Spiraling ✔ Specific Strategies For Preventing Miscommunication ✔ How To Properly Preframe An Agreement With Your Client ✔ So Much More! To access resources and links from this episode, click on Show Notes. P.S. When you’re ready, here are four great ways to improve your time management and elevate your productivity: #1 Grab my FREE mini training Take Back Your Time! #2 Get instant on demand access to my Conquer Your Email Masterclass #3 Get my 4-module, on demand training program Time Management Made Simple #4 Join us in my coaching + training + accountability experience Leverage Lab!
“With a new day comes new strength and new thoughts.” -- Eleanor Roosevelt Guess what?! This is a very special episode of Difficult Happens because I am celebrating The 3 YEAR Anniversary since starting the podcast! With your support, we have made it to over 100 thousand downloads. In the beginning, I jumped in with both feet trying to give everything in the first year to help people reclaim their own power and self-esteem. It is exciting to see more people becoming more aware of what dysfunctional discourse looks like. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What I learned What I did wrong What I did right How I started in Season 1 Coming into my own in Season 2 Discussing the Four Empowered Pillars in Season 3 Where the podcast is going from here Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Episode 21: Julie Fry - Scaling, Communicating, and Change https://difficulthappens.com/21-scaling-communicating-and-change/ Personality Tests Episodes 39 - 42 Episode 39: The DISC https://difficulthappens.com/39-the-disc/ Episode 40: Enneagram https://difficulthappens.com/40-the-enneagram/ Episode 41: How to Fascinate and The Clifton Strengths Finder https://difficulthappens.com/41-fascinate-strengths/ Episode 42: Triggers and The FIRO B https://difficulthappens.com/42-triggers-the-firo-b/ Carol Cox: Speaking Your Brand Podcast https://www.speakingyourbrand.com © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Ever wonder how you can become more productive? You schedule your tasks every day and try to balance your time but fall short of your goals. There are three things that entrepreneurs know to help be more productive from understanding cycles to the impact of task-shifting. Entrepreneurs are a unique type of leader, they have learned when to shift between roles and the ways that they can be more productive in their work without sacrificing their mental health. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The difference between leadership and management The myth of balance Task shifting versus batching Being more productive Speaking Your Brand Event What Entrepreneurs aren’t the greatest at Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Speaking Your Brand; Brave, Bold, and Beyond Virtual Event https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/summit/ Cal Newport; Deep Work https://www.calnewport.com/books/deep-work/ © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever had a client flip from a Dr. Jekyll to a Mr. Hyde? Everything was going along fine and then suddenly their behavior started to change to evasive or defensive. In most cases, they’re experiencing a triggered reaction. But what caused it? Was it something you said or did? Is something else going on? Are you triggered? These triggers and conflicts can lead to feelings of increased stress, tension, and anxiety. (you know your body keeps the score.) If you are an entrepreneur, manager, leader or business owner it has become increasingly more important to be able to pick up on subtle cues and understand why people act, and react, the way they do. When you can understand where people's behavior is coming from you can respond to what is triggering their response, and maybe just turn that client back into the good doctor. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The base of a triggered reaction The conflict loop The animal brain The 4 types of non-trauma based triggered reactions The content trigger Personality tests The big trigger times Responding to what is not being said Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Sometimes we don’t get a choice on whether or not to be a leader. When you run a small business, you will frequently be put into the leadership role where, inevitably, you will have to deal with difficult situations and personalities. Do you have the right support you need to deal with it effectively? The support needed can range from general business support to peer support, and personal support to professional support. From running your own business to leading a team (or existing on the planet! For that matter) you will encounter a variety of personalities in a variety of emotional states, how you navigate these interactions can determine your success. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is Emotional Intelligence Who a leader is (and isn’t) What it takes to be a leader What a heightened emotional state is Different types of support Personal development Challenges that women face The importance of having a squad The Difficult Happens Squad Membership Triggered “Seasons” Join the Squad! A 'whole-human centered' development community of like-minded women who are ready to take their happy back with input, guidance, and support. Personal and Professional development in one place! Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Difficult Happens Squad: https://difficulthappens.com/squad/ Shelby Moore - Young Leadership Challenges https://difficulthappens.com/152-2/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Why would anyone work in a toxic environment? A toxic workplace doesn’t crop up out of anywhere, it is created, moment by moment and action by action. Every day there are news stories about bosses and bad behavior and environments that became unbearable. Have you ever wondered how these environments became so toxic and why people stay? As it turns out, it is a slippery slope. Some fields and environments can become stressful over time and others are inherently stressful fields. When you or your client base is in a heightened emotional state, certain patterns and habits can emerge, showing signs of current or future toxic traits. In today’s episode 10 toxic red flags to watch out for. What you’ll hear: What manipulation looks like How toxicity grows What personal development has to do with it What is self-esteem How to grow self-esteem Micro-boundary breaches The impact of boundaries What every toxic workplace has in common Behaviors and Habits that can turn into toxic behaviors Relationships and Communication structures that can be warning signs of toxic environments Examples of toxic workplaces (Ellen DeGeneres) Why and How people excuse toxic behavior and environments Toxic environments you can find in Start-ups How many red flags before an environment turns toxic Information about next week’s guest Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Join the squad: Inner Circle Squad Membership Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2021 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
On Today's Show: Deal with Difficult People Without Feeling Drained, Exhausted, and Unhappy with Lara Currie of Difficult Happens; Staying Relevant in this Paradigm Shift with Lisa York of Empowered Financial Solutions; & Where Beauty is Science with Kathryn Stueckle of Noevir USA. (ENCORE SHOW) Website(s): https://difficulthappens.com/ https://www.noevirusa.com/
Author & Coach, Lara Currie joins the podcast to discuss manipulative bullying in the workplace and effective ways to deal with it. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/glowupgyrl/support
Manipulative people have an arsenal of tactics they will use against you. Blame-Shifting is one of the big ones. When it is used by a boss or co-worker, it can create a toxic environment quickly, one that, if the manipulator isn’t stopped, will only get worse. In order to combat the blame-shifters tactic, we will shine the light on the many forms of shifting blame (some, may surprise you) and what you can do about it when they try these tactics on YOU. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is Blame-Shifting The Manipulative tactics in action How a victim might be shifting the blame on you Why minimizing you is on the menu How quickly a toxic workplace can be created What you should never do What you should do when blame is shifted onto you Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Hilarious Word Salad Video © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Episode Photo by Hailey Moeller on Unsplash Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Jerky’esque behavior is rampant these days. Shocker (not). Rude, jerky, manipulative behaviors are dysfunctional coping skills learned and practiced over their lifetime and were born from their family of origin. It’s time to take your Happy back! Hold firm to your boundaries and be treated with respect. Today, we dive into how the bad behavior interferes with you, show you the patterns & cycles the manipulator (&jerk) will go through when you stand firm, and what the most important thing you need to know is so that you can tame that jerk, and outwit that manipulator. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Why boundaries are so hard to hold How you are impacted The games a Jerk may play The dance manipulators use What is an extinction What is a behavioral burst and what does it look like Free at last Hold yourself accountable, and hold yourself in Grace Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Oprah, Will Smith, & my Mom, all had an impact on the topic of today’s episode. Whether you have experienced a major life blow, like a divorce or a job change, or a more minor slight like a negative comment or angry road incident, it makes you mad and can be hard to get over it. On today’s show, we talk about how to ‘Get over’ tough things and move past them to a place where you can find some peace. You can’t control the fact that other people’s actions will impact you, but you can control what you do about it. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: How you are impacted by others’ actions The difference between fault and responsibility What your reactions mean How you can ‘turn your mind’ about hard things How taking responsibility empowers you What the four agreements are How to use the four agreements Time frames for moving on, yours and other peoples Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Mentioned in this episode: Catch and Kill: Lies, Spies, and a Conspiracy to Protect Preditors Will Smith; Fault vs Responsibility Super Soul Sunday with Malcolm Gladwell The Four Agreements © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
We have all made decisions that we later regret. The question is, did you learn the lesson you needed to learn from that miscellaneous regrettable decision? Ever turned down a great job because of a shinier one on the horizon? Have you been silent when you should have spoken up? I have done both! In today’s episode, I share some cringe-worthy moments that impact me to this day and I tell you all about them, what I learned, and what I would do differently today. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Trusting your gut What I have learned from my miscellaneous regrettable decisions Trust your gut Not saying yes, and not saying no What is regret Why you should look back at those embarrassing moments How the martyr works Graceful detachment Redirecting behavior The power of what you can control The verbal processor What to say How we react The conflict triangle, triangulation Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types Newsworthy Tina Mitchell Lunch & Learn © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
You know that one person who really pushes your buttons? Who gets under your skin? Yea, that’s the one. Everyone has experienced an irritating person, that one dude who sits on your last nerve, or that mom on the PTA who pushes your buttons, or your teenager when they are bored or just exist as a hormonal mess :) Today we explore why someone pushes your buttons, when it is manipulative and when it is emotionally immature, and what you can do to eliminate or at the very least minimize their impact on you What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Why someone pushes your buttons What your inner state has to do with it How a dysfunctional childhood influences adult behavior The scale of irritation The motive for pushing your buttons How to calm down How to respond to an irritating person When to not respond Wonder what it would be like to work with a coach? Apply for an on-air coaching call Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types TeenWise & MomWise Dr Kirk Honda reacts to Dr Phil © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Think positively, everything happens for a reason, the Universe will take care of it, it will all just magically disappear, it will go away. Have you noticed this type of messaging out there? These vapid empty platitudes, in essence, say absolutely nothing. Toxic positivity is cropping up all over the nation right now, I’m sure you’ve seen it on your news feed or on your social sites. I have witnessed it in my friend groups and from our leaders. How can positivity be toxic? The research on positive psychology shows us that it can be very beneficial to our mind, health, and development. Positive psychology focuses on things like resilience, strengths building, looking at functional and dysfunctional systems. In the right hands, used the right way it can be a healthy lens to interpret & improve thought patterns or thought habits & re-evaluate dysfunctional systems. It can lead to effective tools that you can use in your own personal toolbox and in your personal growth journey. Toxic positivity is the push for a mental state in which we only experience and show positive emotions. It is a tendency to react to others suffering and struggles with reductive statements of positivity. It is telling people that they are their own source of their suffering, or that they brought it on themselves, it is filled with pseudo motivational messaging in a sing-songy cadence of cultish hypnotic dismissal. The use of positive psychology In the wrong hands is dismissive, belittling, and manipulative. This is how manipulators get in the door, toxic people are masters at using the love and light positivity language to manipulate you. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is toxic positivity What is positive psychology What is the difference When motivation goes wrong How manipulators use positivity Too much of a good think Platitudes and attitudes Ignorance & gaslighting Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Complimentary Breakthrough Consultation Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Has anyone ever used the silent treatment with you? Have you ever been ghosted by someone? It feels awful to be on the receiving end of someone else’s loud silence. At best the silent treatment is an immature behavior used by immature and manipulative people. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims. Whether the person in your life is using the silent treatment immaturely or abusively, one thing is for sure, it is infuriating to receive. Problems cannot be dealt with, conflicts remain in limbo, simple conversations are impossible, and in the end, relationships employing this tactic become either toxic on nonexistent. In today’s episode, the silent treatment, in its many forms and what to do about it. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is the ‘silent-treatment’ Why someone uses the silent treatment When it’s a manipulation When it’s emotional immaturity How to respond when someone pulls this on you The impact of silence in relationships Why it hurts so much Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments Series on Conflict Personality-Types © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music by Scott Holmes Music Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“Oh what a tangled web we weave; When first we practice to deceive!” -- Sir Walter Scott Have you ever wondered how people fall for cult leaders? Or why people fall time and time again under the bad influences in their lives? Most people are trusting. You don’t go around expecting people to lie, but when you put your trust into someone who has only their best interests in mind, you may find yourself making excuses for them.It’s easy to bog yourself down even further and fall victim to their manipulation tactics. There are several ways to identify manipulative behavior in order to cut that toxic behavior out of your life, and unmask the lies for what they are. Most people believe that they know themselves and their biases, that they are not easily persuadable by manipulation tactics, or manipulators but the facts are out there in the stories of toxic workplaces and manipulative bosses and leaders. Why do people fall for lies? It’s not as simple as you may think. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The seven types of lies Identifying good vs bad influence How people fall for bogus manipulation tactics Leon Festinger’s cognitive dissonance theory Confirmation Bias and the spread of misinformation Micro boundary breaches How bad influences can turn us against our own morals People we trust have influence over us Steven Hassan’s BITE model (Behavior, information, thought and emotional control) How to be aware of and question manipulative behavior Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: The Good Good Good Co. Monica’s closet No more Ignorance No More Ignorance on LinkedIn The Dream - Season 2 Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Garbage in, garbage out. Have you noticed that there is a lot of negative fear-based messaging out there right now? If we were to believe every story, post, or article that is published you may think our civilization is on the verge of collapse. The truth is, its WAYYY better than you may think. On today’s episode, I dive into 5 reasons it’s not all doom and gloom and how you can ‘turn your mind’ from the black & white, all or nothing, thinking What you’ll hear on today’s episode: How the negative messaging seeps in How our animal brain reacts If it bleeds it leads, how messaging sticks with us How growth can be messy but necessary Why we are getting better The benefit of Introspection How gratitude (real gratitude not fake MLM type gratitude) impacts us How to turn the mind Accepting what is Finding the good Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: The Good Good Good Co. Monica’s closet No more Ignorance No More Ignorance on LinkedIn The Dream - Season 2 Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Photo by Jordan Donaldson | @jordi.d on Unsplash Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
What are Micro-aggressions? Aggression is aggression. Like most things, there is a scale involved, a range. To one extreme the aggression is war, violence, while the other end of the spectrum presents as snide comments and passive-aggressive behavior. Micro-aggressions are so insidious because they hide in plain sight. They are hard to call out and often dismissed by the person using them. These techniques are used by those who have power when they are, or feel, threatened, insecure individuals in particular. It becomes a defense mechanism, it’s purpose is to keep you down, to ‘put you in your place’, thus restoring the persons feeling of power and feeding their fragile ego. Here’s how you combat it, in today’s episode. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: How minimizing is a micro-aggression How Trivializing is a micro-aggression How Grouping is used as a micro-aggression Social constructs The idea of ‘Normal’ The difference between a micro-aggression, a macro-aggression and a micro-insult Why people in power don’t get it Marginalized groups bear the brunt of these forms of aggression Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Photo by Jordan Donaldson | @jordi.d on Unsplash Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Is seems almost cliche to say that we are living in unprecedented times. Or maybe it seems trite. Either way, one thing is certain, bad behavior is on the rise, and so is defensiveness leading to a lot of people acting like Jerks. With emotions at an all-time high how do you be or become a better person when you are surrounded by jerks?? In today’s episode, how to be a better person, not be so negatively impacted by jerky behavior, and techniques to move past defensiveness and ‘just reacting’ to true discourse. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is meant by a heightened emotional state Low-grade depressions impact on how a person acts and reacts Jerks are often defensive out of habit, a desire to control, or out of fear Anger as a mask emotion Looking back to move forward How you are impacted Your sense of self Self-esteem and empowerment Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
How we show up online, now, is more important than in pre-COVID times. In-person meetings and large gatherings are a memory and it’s going to be a minute before they come back. So many online platforms have devolved and actual discourse is difficult if not impossible, so how do you show-up and contribute to the conversation and how do you respond to “Trolls” & “Feed-hijackers”? Today I have Deborrah Ashley with me to talk about showing up and engaging the right way online. Deborrah is a marketing strategist, consultant, and LinkedIn trainer with a background in brand management, marketing & Business Development What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What platform is best for your brand & your business What your profile says about you Everything you say, even on someone else’s post, is findable To engage or not engage a Troll Your voice is needed What is normal anyway Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Dog whistles, tropes, Microaggressions. Women in male-dominated fields deal with these attempts to silence, or sideline, them every week. Last week it came to light that some in presidential candidate Joe Biden’s campaign along with wealthy donors think that Kamal Harris is “Too Ambitious” to be a VP pick. Strong women, women in male-dominated fields, and those who go against ‘societal norms’ hear this trope as a way to minimize, box, and dismiss their authority. In today’s episode, we dive into these microaggressions, how they show up, and what YOU can do to take your power back while showing these phrases for what they are, fearful attempts to minimize. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The three types of Microaggressions Dogwhistles & tropes used to belittle marginalized groups How systemic misogyny gets in your way Why we are stronger together Standing up to microinsults Why things often get worse, after they get better Why women in male-dominated fields hear these the most What you can say to combat these microaggressions Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Some Biden allies wage a shadow campaign to stop Kamala Harris from becoming Vice President In accusations of being too ambitious, some Black women see a double standard Calling Kamala Harris ‘too ambitious is a lesson for young Black girls If Kamala Harris is ‘Too Ambitious,’ Then so is every woman with ambition Is Kamala Harris too ambitious to be Vice President Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Jerky’esque behavior is rampant these days. Shocker (not). Rude, jerky, manipulative behaviors are dysfunctional coping skills learned and practiced over their lifetime and were born from their family of origin. It’s time to take your Happy back! Hold firm to your boundaries and be treated with respect. Today, we dive into how the bad behavior interferes with you, show you the patterns & cycles the manipulator (&jerk) will go through when you stand firm, and what the most important thing you need to know is so that you can tame that jerk, and outwit that manipulator. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: Why boundaries are so hard to hold How you are impacted The games a Jerk may play The dance manipulators use What is an extinction What is a behavioral burst and what does it look like Free at last Hold yourself accountable, and hold yourself in Grace Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Did you know that there are two types of disappointment? The kind that is your responsibility and that you need to reckon with and make amends for and the kind that does not belong to you and sprouts from others’ expectations of you. Nobody likes that sinking feeling you get in your gut when you have disappointed someone, yet it is a feeling we have all had. So what do you do when someone is disappointed in you? Tune in and find out. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: The disappointment you are responsible for When someone’s disappointment is all about them How expectations impact disappointment How to determine your responsibility What to do with all the feels Emotions and manipulation Your body’s reaction www.difficulthappens.com Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: 4 Generations talk about the Equal Rights Amendment Connect with Puja Madan on LinkedIn Visit the Mindfulness Map Site Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments The Language of Emotions - Karla McLaren © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
The most well established, predictable, staunch systems are being re-imagined. Many companies and leaders are looking to make substantive changes. How do you make real changes in such turbulent times? My guest, Puja Madan, helps leaders develop resilience and a mindset shift where real change can happen. Puja and I dive into some pretty tough topics about real change, and fake change like tokenism (but no real procedures or benefits) and virtue signaling (that is symbolic and not substantive). Real change, real growth can happen, and here’s how What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is mindfulness What does it mean to be a mindfulness leader Why it is the top 3 people that can make a difference Can you be a great leader in a toxic work environment What is tokenism & what does it have to do with a toxic policy What is virtue signaling and what does it have to do with manipulation How can we be mindful When unintentional inclusion impacts you Join the Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: 4 Generations talk about the Equal Rights Amendment Connect with Puja Madan on LinkedIn Visit the Mindfulness Map Site Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments The Language of Emotions - Karla McLaren © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Photo by Simon Migaj on Unsplash Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Have you ever been talking with someone and there is a lot being said, but not much understanding? Last week in the Difficult Happens Podcast private FB group, “Community Happens” (if you haven't already, please join us), Rachel mentioned someone who got really wordy in conversations and uses “fact slamming”. Right away I knew what she meant, but not everyone can see it when it is happening around them, or to them. On Today’s episode we talk about obfuscation in communication, particularly by using theRed-Herring fallacy. I’ve got some examples of how this plays out in everyday conversations and what you can do to combat it. What you’ll hear on today’s episode: What is a fallacy What is Obfuscation and why is it a manipulation Examples of the fallacy being used in different situations Why it is so hard to see it when it is right in front of you Social media posts are a hotbed of the red herring fallacy What is the red-herring fallacy Why is it so dangerous How it stops discourse & true communication in its tracks Why people won’t cop to using it Join the conversation - Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments The Language of Emotions - Karla McLaren © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
“I felt so much that I started to feel nothing” -- Lara When we learn, we grow. In my lifetime, there have been many…. let’s say ‘opportunities for growth.’ Today is another one of those opportunities. Our bodies keep the score of every emotion, every feeling that we have. Stress can physically make you sick, trust me, as someone of white-Irish heritage any stress I feel, whether conscious or not, set’s off my skin. Rosacea, psoriasis, hives. I’ve got ‘em all. You know what happens when you ignore the warning signs and when the stress becomes too much? Your body switches tactics and get’s louder. Not in the way you might think, louder in the sense that it starts to shut you down. Feel a lack of energy? A little scatter-brained? Is your mind wandering off? Does a commercial make you cry? Are you jumpy? Today, I am taking my own advice and walking through the hard stuff. Join the conversation - Difficult Happens Facebook group “Community Happens Group” Work with Lara: Apply for an On-air Coaching Call! Free Breakthrough Assessment Got a Question? Comment? Email Lara@difficulthappens.com Corporate Training Difficult Happens by Lara Currie Difficulthappens.com/workwithme/ Resources: Series on Manipulation Series on Assessments © Lara Currie 2020 Show Intro music is Whispering Through by Asura Photo by Finan Akbar on Unsplash Listen for free on the go with any one of these players for both Android & iPhone
Difficult conversations as an opportunity? Challenge as an opportunity? Listen as Lara describes the context of conflict. She discusses how the components of assumption, judgment and expectation lead to a reaction. Tune in to the Body's Signal What is the significance of the physical reaction to an impending conflict? Hear Lara describe the mental and physical connection between emotions and conflict. Two Triggers An emotional trigger can make people think of a violent event. Rather Lara focuses on triggered reactions in conflict situations. Listen as Lara discusses how triggered reactions that are our habits and patterns, can result in negative outcomes. Desire Paths Hear Lara illustrate the importance of Desire paths and the connection to our own emotional patterns. She discusses the connection between reactions and our own emotional connections and past. Raising self-awareness in order to be prepared What does self-awareness have to do with assumptions and preparation for a conflict? The seemingly preordained assumption follows with an associated judgment that leads to an expectation. Hear Lara describe how these emotional perspectives are connected and lead us into patterns. After-action review Hear Lara talk about a realistic methodology in order to assess conflict to improve future situations. After allowing for an emotional cooldown, Lara suggests reflecting on the outcome, what happened before the outcome and what the assumptions were leading up to the situation. And importantly for future improvement, “How would I like to act or react differently next time so that this type of scenario doesn't happen again?” An Example of Personal Conflict Listen as Lara provides an example of a couple having difficulty in their relationship and what she suggests in order to better improve their situation. Communication and reflection provide two of the key ways to improve the situation. Hear Lara describe how the individuals in this situation can improve their relationship. Is curiosity important in this situation? Lara says yes, hear why. After Action Review In conflict, but not having a conflict? What are the signals in your own body that tell you something is wrong? Join in as Lara describes protective emotions that signal the presence of conflict. Conflict Personality Types Hear Lara describe four of the main different conflict personality types and how these personality types can show up actively and passively during a conflict. Listen as Lara gives examples and describes at length these four conflict personality types: the Pleaser-Fixer, the Victim-Blamer, the Perfectionist-Controller, and the Innocent-Avoider. Learn how each of these affects conflict and communication in interpersonal scenarios. Self-Reflection and Awareness Listen to Lara discuss how recognizing your own conflict personality type can help you reflect in order to improve communication in future conflict situations. Deconstruction of Conflict – Communicating in the Emotional Language How do you feel? Lara emphasizes the connection between learning and communicating. She describes the three main ways that people learn as kinesthetically, auditorily and doing. And then she connects these elements to demonstrate how to improve communication and emotional interactions based on these learning preferences. Avoiding Escalation Is it as simple as going outside or taking a walk? Lara offers some simple advice to help couples improve communication. About Lara Currie Lara Currie is an interpersonal conflict resolution specialist with over 25 years of experience in high conflict positions. Author of the book “Difficult Happens”, Lara has a unique perspective assisting business owners and professionals improve interpersonal relationships in the workplace in order to best achieve a client's goals and business objectives. She has a passion for empowering individuals to create positive and profound connections in order to live with less stress to ensure the best success. Her understanding of interpersonal dynamics in difficult situations enables her clients to better navigate tumultuous situations with curiosity and self-reflection that allow clients to Prepare for, Recognize and Navigate difficult people and topics. Links and How to contact Lara Currie Books by the Author: Currie, L. (2017). Difficult Happens. More information: https://laracurrie.com/ More info: Web - https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/ Sex Health Quiz - http://sexhealthquiz.com/ If you're enjoying the podcast and want to be a part of making sure it continues in the future, consider being a patron. With a small monthly pledge, you can support the costs of putting this show together. For as little as $2 per month, you can get advance access to each episode. For just a bit more, you will receive an advance copy of a chapter of my new book. And for $10 per month, you get all that plus an invitation to an online Q&A chat with me once a quarter. Learn more at https://www.patreon.com/bettersexpodcast Better Sex with Jessa Zimmerman https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/More info and resources: How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: How to make sex easy and fun for both of you: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast