Podcasts about adult children

​With the baseball playoffs underway, don't miss a "Best of Chris Fabry Live" conversation with a man who's lived many highs and lows. From being a Major League All-Star to doing prison time. Untold wealth to drug addiction. Even cancer. Darryl Strawberry talks about the transforming power of God's love that changed him from the inside out. Can the same thing happen to you or someone you love? Don't miss Chris Fabry Live. Featured resources:Turn Your Season Around: How God Transforms Your Life by Darryl StrawberryAnother Life: Discovering the Healing Power of Purpose on My Long Journey from Player to Preacher by Darryl Strawberry September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

402-521-3080In this episode, Dr. Rana Pishva & Rebecca Saunders discuss the complexities of parent-child relationships across different life stages, emphasizing the importance of understanding transitions, setting boundaries, and practicing curiosity and humility to foster healthier connections.Key  TopicsThe nature of life transitions and their impact on relationshipsThe importance of recognizing ongoing processes rather than one-time eventsParenting as a series of constant transitions, especially with adult childrenSetting boundaries as rumble strips to maintain healthy relationshipsThe role of curiosity over defensiveness in resolving conflictsRepairing ruptures in relationships through regulation and acknowledgmentThe concept of a 'healthy enough' relationship and its componentsThe significance of humility and self-awareness in parentingThe influence of cultural and generational differences on family dynamicsThe importance of giving oneself permission to set boundaries and make choicesSound Bites"Transitions are a process, not a one-time event.""Humility is a core parenting skill.""You can choose how you're gonna show up."Support the showEveryone has resilience, but what does that mean, and how do we use it in life and leadership? Join Stephanie Olson, an expert in resiliency and trauma, every week as she talks to other experts living lives of resilience. Stephanie also shares her own stories of addictions, disordered eating, domestic and sexual violence, abandonment, and trauma, and shares the everyday struggles and joys of everyday life. As a wife, mom, and CEO she gives commentaries and, sometimes, a few rants to shed light on what makes a person resilient. So, if you have experienced adversity in life in any way and want to learn how to better lead your family, your workplace, and, well, your life, this podcast is for you!https://setmefreeproject.nethttps://www.stephanieolson.com/

What if the antidote to our loneliness isn’t found in another program or platform, but in something as simple and sacred as a table? Author Ian Simkins believes we live in an age of distraction and disconnection. While we scroll endlessly, we ache quietly for real community. That’s why he believes every table is an altar. What does the Bible say about this table invitation? Find out on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resources:Every Table an Altar: Reclaiming Connection in a World of Division, Distraction, and Loneliness by Ian Simkins September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Power of Praying Scriptures over your Marriage: Special Patreon Release with Jodie Berndt   1 Thessalonians 3:12 (NIV) "May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else, just as ours does for you."   *Transcription Below*   Jodie Berndt is bestselling author of the Praying the Scriptures book series, which includes volumes for Children, Teens, Adult Children, and Life, plus the new Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage (2023). Jodie has been a trusted speaker, Bible teacher, and prayer warrior for over thirty years. She and her husband, Robbie, have four married children, and they live in Virginia Beach, Virginia.   Connect with Jodie through her website or Instagram.   Questions and Topics We Discuss: What are some ancient truths from Scripture that stand out to you, specifically as it relates to marriage? Will you share a few of the helpful questions for couples that you write in the book? How have you seen kindness open the door to changes in a marriage?   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”   Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”   Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”   Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”   John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:09)   Laura Dugger: (0:10 - 2:47) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.   I want to say a huge thank you to today's sponsors for this episode, Chick-fil-A East Peoria and Savvy Sauce Charities.   If this is your first time here, welcome! You may be wondering what it means to have a special Patreon release. So, here's the scoop. Patreon was a platform we used to generate financial support for The Savvy Sauce, and we expressed our thanks to those paying patrons by giving them a bonus episode every month. But, in 2024, we transitioned away from Patreon when we became a non-profit called Savvy Sauce Charities. The podcast is part of this non-profit, which exists to resource loved ones to inspire growth and intimacy with God and others.   So, people used to pay to support us through Patreon, but now they can just donate directly to our non-profit. We spend thousands of dollars each year to record and produce these episodes, and we do pray that they're beneficial and that God sees fit to use them to be transformational in your life. If that is the case, if you have ever benefited from an episode of The Savvy Sauce, would you consider showing your gratitude through your financial generosity? Any amount is greatly appreciated. In fact, if every listener gave only $1 per month, it would completely offset our costs. We have all the details on our website, thesavvysauce.com, but feel free to also reach out to our team anytime if you want to partner together. Our email address is info@thesavvysauce.com.   And now I'm pleased to share this episode with you that used to only be available to paying patrons. Jodie Berndt is my guest today. She is the bestselling author of the Praying the Scriptures book series, and today we're going to focus on the powerful way to pray the scriptures for our marriage. And I just want to give you a heads up that you may hear a lot of airplanes in the background during our conversation, but I hope it doesn't take away from all the goodness Jodie is about to share. Here's our chat.   Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Jodie.   Jodie Berndt: (2:49 - 2:53) Laura, thank you. It is just a huge treat to be able to chat with you today.   Laura Dugger: (2:54 - 2:59) Well, will you begin by just first telling us a bit about yourself and the work that you get to do?   Jodie Berndt: (3:01 - 4:19) Sure. Yes. Well, like you, I have four children. Mine are grown now, though. I have three daughters and then a son at the end, and they're all adults and married and having kids of their own. I met my husband back when we were in college. We both went to the University of Virginia and got married right after college, kind of jumped into the whole marriage and family thing. By today's standards, it seems ridiculously young. I look back and I think I don't know what we were thinking. But as Robbie, my husband says, when you meet the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start right now. And I think we both kind of felt that way. And so, we've been married now, I guess, nearly 38 years.   Your listeners may know that I write books. I write the Praying the Scriptures books. I've done others as well. But those are the ones that I am primarily focused on now. Praying the Scriptures for Your Children, your teens, your adult children, your life, because we needed ourselves too. And then most recently, Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage. So, I never set out to become a prayer writer or even a book writer. But golly, I have realized the power of prayer and my desperate need for God's help in all things. So, I think it sort of fell backwards into it. And it's been a fun journey.   Laura Dugger: (4:20 - 4:37) Well, and I first encountered that book that you mentioned, Praying the Scriptures for Your Children, when I was a new mom, and it was so powerful. So, when you look back to that one, what are some of the stories or takeaways that really stand out from that resource?   Jodie Berndt: (4:38 - 9:31) Oh, gosh. Well, thank you for asking about that one. That was a book that was sort of born, as I said, out of my own need for the Lord, because nothing reveals your flaws and inadequacies and need for help beyond yourself as much as having children does. At least for me, that was the case. I'd grown up in a Christian home. Prayer was a natural part of life for me but not sort of the specific intentional prayers and not praying the scriptures.   And for anybody who doesn't know what that means, it just means taking the words that we read in the Bible, the things that God actually says to us there and using them to shape how we think about things, how we long for things, kind of creating our desires as based on what we read and then animating our prayers so that, as Jesus says in John 15, he looks at his disciples, he's getting ready to go to the cross, and you think of all the things he could have talked about. He chose to drill down on staying connected to him primarily through our prayers. He says, "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you want and it will be done for you." And then he explains why. He says, "This is to my Father's glory that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples."   And I think I read that chapter in those specific verses, probably a hundred times over my life without fully comprehending what he was talking about there. And I think what he's talking about is that as we abide in him, as we remain in him, as we stay connected day in and day out, whether we're doing the laundry or running a carpool or anything else, we can allow the things we read in the Bible to shape our thoughts, shape our longings, and then give voice to our prayers. And when we do that, that really is the secret to living a difference-making, transformational, impactful life, to bearing fruit.   I loved being able to kind of look back over a 20-year history. And the stories in that book, in all my books, are real-life people who have real-life struggles and real-life prayers. And some of them have very happy endings. Some of them are still being played out. All of them represent times when we're having to trust God. And as I looked back over 20 years of praying parents and watched these families, where when I first was interviewing the mom or the dad, their kids might be five or seven or ten years old. And now, you know, these kids are in their 30s, some of them. And I'm like, wow, God, you know, it's like watching hair grow sometimes when we're praying and we don't see the needle moving. But with the perspective of history and time, you can see how God works. And so that was a huge blessing to me that I didn't expect when I went back and re-read the book and updated the book to be able to see what God has done.   And one particular chapter that I loved in that book was the chapter on praying for your child to promote God's kingdom. And there's a story in there about two little second grade boys, Brandon and Eddie. And I was part of a moms in prayer group at the time. And we were praying a verse, Ephesians 5:16, that our kids would make the most of every opportunity, that they would be wise in the way they live. We really didn't know how God would answer that prayer. But what parent doesn't want their child to be wise in the way they live and to make the most of the opportunities? Well, sure enough, we prayed that prayer. And two weeks later, one of the moms in our group came in and told the most jaw-droppingly beautiful story of how her son, a second grader, as part of an in-class assignment, had chosen to write a persuasive essay. And you can imagine what a second-grade essay looks like. But most of the kids in the class thought, I'm going to persuade my grandmother to give me a bicycle or I'm going to persuade my mom to let me stay up late and watch a TV show, whatever it is. This child chose to write to one of his classmates, who had been known as a real troublemaker in that class and in the school, about why he should accept Jesus as the Lord of his life. And he put these 10 points, things like, you know, God loves you. Jesus loves you. You can have anything you want in heaven. Just is a second grader's viewpoint. And I'm telling you what, I did that interview and wrote that story 20 some years ago. And still today, as I look back on that child and again, getting to watch him grow up, he's now a father with children of his own. And seeing how God has worked in that child's life in answer to that Ephesians 5 prayer that our child will be wise, making the most of every opportunity. I'm just dumbfounded. First, by how God answered that in a second grader's life and how he's continued to have the answer to that prayer unfold over this young man's life as he's grown. It's just we never can know when we pray what God will do.   Laura Dugger: (9:33 - 9:53) Absolutely. Because the fruit looks so different than the seed. And that's incredible to have that gift of perspective. But now with your newest title, Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage, first of all, how do you even respond to someone if they ask you, why does prayer matter in marriage?   Jodie Berndt: (9:54 - 12:29) Yeah, well, that's actually a question that I get more than you would think. And especially from people who aren't super comfortable praying. Because a lot of us, even if we've grown up in church-going Christian homes, the idea of praying with our spouse just might not come naturally. And even for Robbie and me. But I'll tell you one of the reasons we want to do it is because prayer really does matter. As I jumped into writing this book, I started doing some research and secular research points to all of these benefits that it reinforces the idea of prayer does that you're on the same team. Psychologists have found that prayer increases a sense of satisfaction in your relationship. It heightens your own sense of emotional well-being. If you're mad, it gives you a chance to calm down. It can lower your blood pressure. And there have even been studies done that shows that when couples pray together, it even leads to better sex. And so, you get all of these things that are completely separate from maybe the spiritual side of why God would want us to pray. This is just the secular research.   But when you take it a step further and look at why God wants us to pray, oh, my goodness. You know, it opens the door to intimacy, both with ourselves and with the Lord, because honestly, it's being vulnerable, isn't it? When we pray, you know, that is asking God for help. That's acknowledging our dependence on him, admitting we can't always be kind or selfless or forgiving on our own. And, you know, I don't know any husbands or wives who can do those things because we're all inherently flawed. We're broken. We're selfish people. And we can kind of start to shrivel up under what pressure to just get it all right, you know, to be a good wife, to be a good husband. And we can feel like we're failing. And yet, when we realize that through prayer, we've got this vehicle of inviting God into the mix, into our relationship, of letting the Holy Spirit step in and do the things that only he can do to work in us, giving us, as Philippians 2:13 says, the desire and the power to do what pleases God. I mean, that just changes the equation. It removes the burden from our shoulders of trying to build a strong marriage or be a good husband or wife. And just says, God, you know what? I can't do this on my own. I need you. Our marriage needs you. And that just opens up the runway, I think, for us in marriages and really gives us a new intimacy and a new confidence in our relationships.   Laura Dugger: (12:30 - 12:45) Well, and Jodie, you did so much research on marriages in preparation for this book. So, what are some of the ancient truths from Scripture that stand out to you specifically as it relates to marriage?   Jodie Berndt: (12:45 - 16:24) I'll tell you, an ancient truth that runs throughout Scripture is God's desire for us to talk to him about all of the details of our lives. There's nothing too big or nothing too small for him to care about. And I know you shared with me that you loved the Isaiah 7:11 verse in The Message translation, which is when Ahaz and the Lord are talking together. And God says, ask anything, you know, be extravagant, ask for the moon. And that's God's invitation to us to ask big. But there are also verses in Scripture where it says, you know, he delights in the details of our lives. He bends down to listen. So, we really can talk to him about the smallest things.   And I'll tell you, in terms of what you term ancient truths, I would say, and your listeners, I'm sure, know this, that the Bible is kind of one big story of God's love for us. And the covenant of marriage really is designed to reflect that. You know, we say this in our marriage vows, but I've yet to meet a bride or groom who really knows what they're talking about when they say those vows. I know for Robbie and me, we were just starry eyed and in love and speaking these vows without even really thinking what it would mean for better, for worse, you know, in sickness and health, to love and to cherish all of those things. But I'll tell you what, marriage gives us a chance to live out the gospel every day in a million little ways.   I love what Tim Keller says about the gospel. He says the gospel is this. It's that we are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe. And yet at the very same time, we are more loved and accepted in Jesus than we ever dared hope. And, you know, isn't that a picture of marriage? Because nothing reveals our flaws and our sins as much as taking two inherently selfish people and bringing them into close proximity with each other day in and day out. We are going to love against each other. We're going to be aware of our brokenness. Nobody knows my weak points as much as my husband. Nobody knows his as much as I do. So, we're so aware that we're flawed. And yet within the covenant of our marriage, we can honestly say, OK, we are more loved and accepted than we ever dared hope as we do what Christ did and give ourselves up for one another.   Ephesians 5, it's that classic New Testament passage about how human relationships are supposed to work. And Paul starts out, he says, Ephesians 5:2, "Walk in love as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." And you may blow by a verse like that because it sounds very theological and holy. And you think, OK, what does that really mean in my human relationships? And more specifically, what does that mean for our marriage? OK, walking in love, giving yourself up. It could be something as simple as getting out of bed to let the dog out so that your husband or your wife can sleep in. It may be going to the in-laws for dinner when everything in us wants to stay home because we know that's what our spouse longs to do. Anytime we choose to put our partner's needs and desires ahead of our own, that's partaking of the gospel. That is giving ourselves up for them as Jesus gave himself up for us. Even as we do that in the little decisions of our lives every day, we get to live out that gospel. And what a beautiful opportunity. So, if I had to take one ancient truth from all of scripture, it would be that the Bible is one big love story of God's love for us. And in our marriages every day, we can live that out in a million little decisions.   Laura Dugger: (16:26 - 16:50) Well, in your book, you open up about your journey of learning to listen to your husband instead of interrupting him. Oh, yeah. And just a crazy side note. I'm just going to quote you here where you write, the average person pays attention for about eight seconds and can only go 17 seconds before interrupting someone. 17 seconds.   Jodie Berndt: (16:50 - 19:53) Yes. I mean, I read that in my research. I think that was out of Stephen Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, I think was the source there. But when I read that, I thought, oh, my goodness. A, that makes me just mortified. But B, it makes me feel better about myself because I am an interrupter. I always think that I have the answer, the solution or something that's going to be really either interesting to say or solving to say whatever it is. And I had to learn to give my husband space to speak because like a lot of men, I think he's not super verbose. He's not going to be letting his words tumble out. And so, I have to give space and time in our conversations for him to be able to get his words together instead of just leaping to a conclusion and saying, I know exactly what you mean or stepping in and trying to finish his sentence because he may have something that he's concerned about or worried about.   You know, I tell a story in the book, too, where when we taught a marriage class, we had to rate each other on all kinds of things, 20 different topics on a scale of like zero to four. I think it was. And he gave me a zero in meeting his emotional needs. And I thought zero, but that's not fair. I didn't even know you had emotional needs because you are such a steady, reliable, non-mercurial person. And I realized just because he's steady and not all over the map, doesn't mean he doesn't have fears and worries and concerns and emotional needs just like I do. I had to learn to kind of let him express those. And for his part, he had to learn to let me speak without immediately jumping in and wanting to fix something. I think men, a lot of our husbands are natural fixers. They love us. They want to solve our problems. They want to help us analyze what's wrong. And there have been times where I have had to just look at Robbie, sometimes even take a space in my hands and say, OK, I just want to tell you something. And I don't need you right off the bat to fix it. I just need to be heard. I need to know that you understand. So, will you just listen without trying to solve or analyze or fix and let me express myself, communicate? And that's been a really good listening tool. So so, between me trying to interrupt and him trying to solve and fix, we have really had to learn some some tools and some strategies that we talk about in the book for becoming better listeners.   And I think it only makes sense, right? We are not ever taught to listen or taught to speak. I've got grandchildren here and it's really fun to watch them at age one and two and three learn to mimic what we say when we say, can you say yes, please? Can you say, you know, I love you. And it's delightful to watch our children learn to form words. But nobody ever says to us, OK, let me teach you to listen. Let me teach you to wait. Let me teach you to reflect. Let me teach you to ask questions to help you understand more. All of those things may not come naturally to us. And so, there are things we have to be intentional in marriage and in every relationship about learning.   Laura Dugger: (19:54 - 20:07) Well, are there any of those game changing tools that you would like to elaborate on if someone really hasn't been trained to learn how to listen? Well, what has helped you and Robbie really listen and love?   Jodie Berndt: (20:07 - 22:13) Yeah, well, me not. Number one, expecting him to be a mind reader. I think sometimes we girls, because we intuit things, we think, oh, surely he'll pick this up. And I've had to learn that I need to really be clear in my communication. And just like I said earlier, you know, if I just want him to listen without fixing, I need to say that. And we've also had to learn things like I think sometimes listeners can try to reassure other people. We can minimize the problem saying, oh, it's going to be all right. You know, don't worry. That happened to me once, too. And while we might think we're doing someone a favor by that, what we're really doing is undermining their need to express themselves, to be heard, to say they really are afraid or concerned.   And so, I think a good listener doesn't just jump in immediately with the reassurance or another bad habit is deflecting, you know, saying, oh, yeah, that reminds me of the time I. And we think, oh, good, we're going to take their mind off the problem by telling them another story. And no, they don't maybe need to have their mind taken off it right then. What they might need right then is to know that they're being heard. Or even another bad habit that we had to learn to avoid is intellectualizing something or explaining something. You know, well, the reason it didn't go well for you at work today, honey, is that you probably started by just saying exactly what you felt without giving everybody else in the room a chance to speak or whatever it is. You know, we're going in trying to armchair quarterback our spouse's life by explaining and intellectualizing when, again, they just need to know we're listening, we're hearing, we're willing to be sympathetic and empathize, and we're willing to pray. And we don't have to have the answers.   We can say, gosh, that must be hard. You know, why don't we just stop right now and just say, God, we don't know what to do here. Just like Jehoshaphat had said, you know, he was facing vast armies. He said, God, I don't know what to do. We don't know what to do. But our eyes are on you. And we can say that in our marriage saying, I don't know how to help my spouse. We don't know what to do about this. But God, we're inviting you into this mix. And that's what a good listener can sound like. Sometimes you don't have to have all the answers.   Laura Dugger: (22:14 - 22:36) And I would even add, I guess it's part of the hope of this podcast, even, to ask really great questions. And our tagline is Practical Chats for Intentional Living. And the hope is that anyone listening would be inspired to also ask great questions and have their own practical chats for intentional living.   Jodie Berndt: (22:36 - 25:28) Yes, I love that you bring that up. Because in the book, there are questions at the end of every chapter. I didn't start out to write Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage. But after these other four books came out, I kept hearing from people on Instagram or via my website saying, when are you going to write something about marriage? You know, I'm in this most important human relationship. And we are grating against each other. You know, we need God's help when it comes to knowing how to handle conflict, how to handle our finances, time with our in-laws, intimacy issues, or learning, as you and I have been talking here, how to talk well, how to listen well, how to communicate, how to make friends. You'd think that would come naturally, but sometimes it doesn't. And couples struggle to find people that they want to do life with.   So, all of these things, leaving our legacy, parenting, are things marriages want God to be involved in. And so, these are what the different chapters, the topics. And at the end of each one, there are questions that we can ask our spouse. You know, hit the pause button and say, you know, say it's the chapter on having fun together. We might get to the end of that chapter and say, what's something you'd like to do that might surprise me? Because we don't always know what our spouse's idea of relaxation or fun or laughter would look like. And so, the questions in there are designed to elicit conversation. And you know what? If your spouse isn't interested in talking to you about any of those things, you can talk to the Lord about them. You can open your journal, and you can just write things out. You can listen to God. So, the discussion starters are in there for husbands and wives to use together or for you to use in your own quiet times with the Lord.   And I'll tell you, this is the only book in the series that Robbie has really written with me. He read every word of every chapter before I would send it off to the editor. And time and again, he would come back to me, and he would say, Jodie, I don't think a husband's going to really know what you mean by that. Or I don't think you have dug deep enough on this one or been as helpful as you might be on that one. And that made it hard. I mean, talk about a chance to have conflict with your spouse, invite them to edit your book. But it was so valuable because it has created a resource where I think a wife might buy the book. But I really do think a husband now might be willing to pick up the book. And even if the husband's not digging deep into the stories of every chapter, any husband or any wife can pick it up. Pray the 10 or 12 verses at the end of each chapter or just pray one verse that seems to resonate. And then avail themselves of those discussion questions and conversation starters so that it can help communication both between husband and wife and between you and God. So, thank you for bringing up that part about questions, because that really is something we need to do more about in life. We can't ever know someone without asking those things.   Laura Dugger: (25:29 - 26:18) I agree. And so, we've covered now how listening is that one important ingredient in communication. But in addition, you write, it is still important to stay current with our spouse by also talking and sharing what's going on within and around us. And you write on page 49, The things we don't say can become wedges in our relationships. Communication involves two parts, talking and listening, and we need to be good at both. And Jodie, I think that you model a helpful way to think about this through something that you taught your children. So, will you share that illustration of serving the ball and hitting it back and how that applies to conversation?   Jodie Berndt: (26:18 - 29:16) That's so funny that you pulled that out. And its funny right now because I just read that in a very important intellectual article that showed up in my inbox from one of these institutes. I follow on family studies and different things. I thought that Robbie and I had invented this idea of serving the ball. Our son was an athlete and not much of a talker. And because he was an athlete all year round, he would go to different tournaments, different places. And I remember him being a young teen and not being super eager to engage in conversation. But because we had four kids and you can relate to this, we were not always taking our kids to all the different tournaments and activities. A lot of times they'd be riding in a car with another adult, another team dad or mom. And on one occasion, I remember popping him in the car with a friend of ours who was going to go meet a lacrosse team, you know, another state away. And we knew he'd be in the car for three or four hours. And we said, OK, you know, when Mr. So-and-so asks you a question, you can't just answer with one word, you know, like I'm good or yes, sir. We want you to hit the ball back. We want you to think of something that you can ask him. Think of a conversation. That's our son's name. We said, like you're in a game where the ball has to go back and forth, like say something to keep it in play. And for him, that was a real eye opener for how to learn to talk when he mostly knew how to hit balls back and forth.   And researchers noticed that couples who paid that attention, you know, if a spouse, if a husband said, hey, look at that bird. Isn't that a pretty bird? If the wife didn't even notice the bird, that planted a seed of contempt or indifference, coldness, the cold shoulder that could grow, whereas if the partner said, wow, gosh, that is a pretty bird, and, you know, that reminds me of the one we saw last week on our walk, and, I mean, that's a silly illustration, maybe noticing the bird, maybe it's a sunset, maybe it's saying, wow, this, you know, hamburger is really good, whatever it is, whatever the little tidbits of conversation, when we pick up, when we hit the ball back, when we pay attention and say, you know, yeah, that creates an interest in our spouse and a kindness.   Laura Dugger: (29:17 - 35:00) And now a brief message from our sponsor.   Did you know you can go to college tuition-free just by being a team member at Chick-fil-A East Peoria? Free college education. All Chick-fil-A East Peoria team members in good standing can take advantage of this incredible benefit. If you're looking for a workplace that invests in your future, Chick-fil-A East Peoria is the place for you. You don't have to go into debt for college. Visit Chick-fil-A.com/EastPeoria and click on the career tab. And if you aren't located near Chick-fil-A East Peoria, make sure you check with your local Chick-fil-A restaurant to see if they also participate.   Jodie Berndt: And I'll tell you, when I started doing the kindness research, I said to Robbie, do you think some people are just more naturally kind than others? And he said, yeah, I do. I think some people are just naturally more kind. And I think he's right, but I don't think you put a period there, because kindness is a fruit of the Spirit, right? Galatians 5:22 and 23, it does talk about how love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness is what the Holy Spirit does in our lives. And researchers have found that kindness actually works with them like a muscle. It gets stronger in our lives the more we commit to using it. And I love what folks at the National Marriage Project discovered. They discovered that when we are kind to our spouse with these simple things, you know, bringing them a cup of coffee in the morning, it doesn't even have to be super important, that creates an atmosphere in which generosity toward one another can flourish. And what it does is create an upward spiral. You know, we all talk about downward spirals and how we can just descend into contempt or coldness. We can also ascend. We can create that upward spiral through simple, small words and gestures that communicate kindness in marriage. And it can change the whole climate and allow intimacy and love to flourish.   And I will tell you what, Robbie and I are in the empty nest years, and we have friends who are in our same season, and a couple of couples in particular. For the last maybe four or five years have confided to us that they're not as kind to one another as they would like to be. Their marriage is strong. They're not getting a divorce, but their kids are raised, and they each have kind of their own lanes they're in, and they're in the empty nest, and they're recognizing that they just don't treat each other with the generosity and love in their words and in their actions that maybe they did when they were younger. And you would say, oh, what a shame. Except that it's not a shame because these couples have committed to praying about it and to inviting other couples who will keep that confidential into their lives to say, hey, will you pray this for us? And I will tell you what, we are seeing the needle move in our friends' lives. It is a beautiful thing to watch someone in their 60s who thinks, you know what, I'm just not that kind, actually begin to soften and change and be kind as the Holy Spirit goes to work. So, if you're listening and you're thinking, you know what, I'm just not that nice of a person. I'm just not that kind. Or my spouse, they've been kind of cool or cold all these years. Don't give up. Keep praying. Keep trying. Keep relying on the Holy Spirit. Invite other couples into the mix who can come alongside you and pray for you and even maybe hold you a little accountable saying, okay, you know, that word was maybe harsher than it needed to be. And watch what God can do. Kindness really matters.   Laura Dugger: (45:06 - 45:45) Yes, it does. And my husband, Mark, and I love to ask questions of couples who are in the next season of life. So, we have some friends at church who are empty nesters, and we've asked them similar questions around kindness. And it was really helpful that they said what really enhanced their marital satisfaction and enjoyment of one another in those years was their tone. And I thought that was a really practical application, just to be mindful of our tone. At any season, I think of us raising little ones as well to watch our tone with our kids and our spouse.   Jodie Berndt: (45:46 - 46:16) Yeah, absolutely. And even when we speak in a tone that might, you know, I believe me, can blurt something out and it comes out sounding snippier than I meant. And I have to recognize that and say, I know that came out like I was challenging you or that I was correcting you or whatever. I didn't mean it that way. That was a genuine question of, you know, do you think we should do this or that? And I'm sorry it sounded snippy. So, we have to be aware. And when those things slip out to quickly correct that and say, gosh, sorry, let me try that again.   Laura Dugger: (46:17 - 46:38) Yeah. And I guess it's reminded me of one other quote that was really helpful. On page 63, you shared that one husband was giving a really practical definition for respect. And he said, respect looks like paying attention when I am talking, even if you have better things to do.   Jodie Berndt: (46:39 - 48:11) Yeah, I remember that couple. And I'll tell you, this was a great illustration. I'm glad you brought that one up because this is a wife who loved her husband deeply, respected what he did, said good things about him publicly and in front of people. And she would think, well, so of course he knows I respect him. Like I just praised him in front of our small group, or I just told him what a great job I thought he did on that presentation or whatever he told me about from work. And she thought, so of course he knows I respect him, but he's watching their day in, day out encounters and realizing that like so many women, you know, we do five things, 10 things at once. And he's thinking, I don't even think you're paying attention to me because I'm over here talking and you know, you're cooking the dinner or checking something on your phone or whatever. And you're listening with kind of half an ear. And she had to learn that to him, respect meant stop what you're doing and pay attention to me. And of course we can't do that all the time. Like especially if we've got little kids and they're grabbing our legs and stuff, we might have to say, hold on. I really want to pay attention to what you're saying. Can you give me five minutes to, you know, get the child settled with a coloring book or put the baby to bed or get some food in this toddler, whatever it is, because this is important to me. And I want to pay attention. So sometimes when an important need for respect is, is happening, we have to just set the stage to reassure our partner that yeah, I love you. I want to listen. I want to pay attention. I want to respect you. Let me set it up so I can do that really well. So yeah, good one.   Laura Dugger: (48:12 - 48:17) Well, do you have any other favorite stories or lessons that stand out from your book?   Jodie Berndt: (48:18 - 51:06) Well, I think a big takeaway for me is the importance of community kind of at every stage. You know, the Bible says walk with the wise and become wise for a companion of fools suffers harm. You know, that's a proverb. And I think it's really true that we need to be intentional about who we surround ourselves with. Certainly, as we're starting out young in our marriages, there's going to be adjustment phases. Even the most well-suited couples come from two different families. And as we're trying to blend our expectations, our needs, our desires, our histories, they're going to be bumps along the way. And you want to be surrounded with couples who will be able to almost laugh with you and say, yeah, you know, we had that too. And let me just tell you, here's how we navigated that. Instead of somebody who will say, oh my gosh, my husband drives me just as crazy. Like literally, I had a running group one time where I realized that there was a lot of husband bashing going on in the early morning hours as we would get out on the street, you know, before the kids went to school. And I thought this isn't really healthy. We need to change the channel on this conversation. And so, you know, and sometimes that was doable by simply changing the topic of conversation or saying something positive or just saying, “Hey, let's all list three things we're grateful about, about our spouse.”   But I think how we surround ourselves with couples really makes a difference also in the empty nest years. And I think our friendships change. Robbie and I have had friends change significantly many times over the years. Sure. There are those people that we can look back on college roommates that we're still in touch with, and that's wonderful. But we have had cross country moves four times. We have had different seasons with our kids where all of our friends might be the ones we're on the bleachers with because we are seeing them two and three times a week and traveling on the weekends to games and things like that. And now we're in the empty nest years and our friends are starting to go visit grandkids. They are in retirement, some of them and traveling for fun. Others have taken up new hobbies, new volunteer commitments. So that landscape has shifted and we've had to say, all right, let's look for life giving people, be intentional about who we want to invite over to our house for dinner, who we'd like to co-chair a project with, something where we are constantly thinking about how we can surround ourselves with people who share our faith, who will sharpen us. Again, that proverb about iron sharpening iron, our friends really matter. We want to be around people who keep us sharp and who will be intentional about pouring into our marriages. So, you know, they say divorce is catching, and it really is. If you're in a community where people are just quick to give up or quick to bash their spouse, change that, change that in your life. Look for folks who are leaning in and helping one another love well.   Laura Dugger: (51:07 - 51:27) And I think you're very encouraging to those couples that are entering or in the midst of the empty nest phase of life. And you drew out a proverb that I'd never heard in The Message version in Proverbs 4:18, where it says the longer they live, the brighter they shine.   Jodie Berndt: (51:28 - 51:58) Yeah. Isn't that a great one? I mean, you could read Proverbs 4:18 and in the NIV and the ESV and the King James, all that. And it's always good. But boy, when I hit it in The Message, and I don't know, I might've seen it around my 50th birthday or something, but I thought the longer they live, the brighter they shine. Amen. God, I want to put that on my refrigerator. Just remind me that, you know, you don't necessarily have to have all the Botox to keep shining bright. You can just have the Holy Spirit living in you and through you animating your life and making you radiant. So yeah, I love that one. I'm glad you called that out.   Laura Dugger: (51:59 - 52:06) Yeah. Are there any other ways that you see that play out as people do start to navigate these empty nest years?   Jodie Berndt: (52:07 - 53:52) I think you can become kind of insular as you get older. If we weren't being intentional about trying to have new experiences, make some new friends, your world can start shrinking because maybe your responsibilities at work aren't as demanding. So, you have more time away from work or your kids are gone. So, you're not seeing all the friends that you've done life with all that time. So, emptiness can be a time of loneliness for couples. And it can be a time when you are thinking, gosh, I'm not as active or having as much fun. But we have a friend named Jim Burns. He's written a lot of books on marriage and family issues. And he writes, he says, who would have thought that the most intimate times in a marriage aren't necessarily in the first few years, but in the empty nest. And he and his wife have navigated this transition so successfully. And I think it's in large part because they have been intentional about having fun together, about trying new things. And another couple, I know Susan and Johnny Yates, they're in their seventies. And they were like, Hey, we've never gone snowmobiling. You want to try it? Yeah, let's try it. And I just think, you know, the more we're willing to get out there and try new experiences, a new place to visit, it might even be as simple as a restaurant we've never been to, but just kind of ensuring that your world stays bigger, your friend groups stay bigger, and that you can be leaning into the fact that, you know, I think about Job where it says, God blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the former. And there is a real, a real beauty to knowing that you have a lot of runway left when you hit the empty nest years and asking God, how do you want to use me in my family, in my church, in my community, and being open to the things he puts in front of you?   Laura Dugger: (53:53 - 54:02) I love that. And Jodie, you are just such an encourager. So where can we go online to learn more from you after this conversation?   Jodie Berndt: (54:03 - 55:19) Thank you for asking that. My website is jodieberndt.com. And I would really encourage people to check that out and kind of scroll around. There's an area called resources and printables where there's a lot of free stuff like 31-day prayer calendars. You can download and print to help you pray for your marriage, a verse every day, or pray for your children or your adult children, your teens, your life, all of those calendars are on there, as well as little prayer cards, things you can tuck into your kid's lunchbox or leave on their bedside table. If you have a teenager who maybe would roll their eyes, you know, if you want to walk in there and say goodnight prayers, you might say, well, you know what? I'm just going to leave this little thing on their pillow, so they know that mom or dad is praying. And again, even if they're acting like they don't want it, I've never yet met a teen, my own included, who used to sometimes roll their eyes who will now tell me, you know what mom? I really was listening. I really did appreciate that. So, a little hang in there strategy, but yes, at jodieberndt.com all those resources. And then I'm pretty active on Instagram and that's just @jodie_berndt. So, if people want to follow there, I love to share different prayer prompts or encouragements. People can DM me with questions and it's just a fun way to, to make friends in a digital way that you might not ever be able to see someone in real life, but we can all learn from each other.   Laura Dugger: (55:19 - 55:40) Well, we will add links to all of those places in the show notes for today's episode. And you may already be familiar that we're called The Savvy Sauce because yes, I love it. I love it. And savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for you today, Jodie, what is your savvy sauce?   Jodie Berndt: (55:41 - 57:21) That is such a great question. I love that you asked all your guests that I think for me, this might sound boring or even holier than thou, but I don't mean it that way. For me, a scripture is my savvy sauce. Like I turn to the Bible for my answers. I turn to it to shape my prayers. Like I can be so given to worry about something. I can just naturally go to a place of panic or uncertainty. And yet in the pages of scripture, I find promises that I can hold on to in a way that I can exchange my panic for peace and just trust God's provision. And the circumstances might not have changed, but what has changed as I lean into the Lord and read of his faithfulness in the past, they can help me trust for the future and it doesn't have to be this long. Like the other thing is there was a time when I thought, oh gosh, if I don't spend a half an hour, an hour, you know, reading my Bible with a candle smelling up the room and a nice cup of coffee and my journal open, it's not going to count. And I really, especially when I had younger children, it was so beautiful. An older woman, older mother set me straight. She said, Jodie, you know, you can talk to God in the carpool line. You can read three verses of scripture and meditate on those during the day. That may be more transformational than reading an entire book of the Bible and just having permission to take that in small bites, especially if you've got little ones. I think that is a great savvy sauce. Just find yourself a verse or two, hold onto it, write it out on an index card and meditate on it during the day and see what it does.   Laura Dugger: (57:22 - 57:43) That is so good. And going back to what we had talked about earlier, I experienced so much kindness in you and have really enjoyed this conversation and appreciate all that you've brought to encourage marriages. And I'm wondering if you would just close us out now with a prayer over all the marriages that are represented right now.   Jodie Berndt: (57:44 - 59:43) Oh, I would be so honored to do that. And right back at you. I mean, you're just, your voice is so very kind and welcoming. I just know your listeners love tuning in because it's like,  just having a conversation with a dear friend. So, thank you for that. But I would love, love, love to pray.   Heavenly Father, I just thank you so much for this conversation. I thank you so much for every marriage, every household represented as folks who are listening. And I just want to pray that prayer that I think I start the book with because it just jumps out at me day in and day out from 1 Thessalonians 3:12, "May our love overflow and increase for each other and for everyone else." That's something that Paul prayed for the Thessalonians. And I just want to pray it over all of our marriages, over all of our lives, over our parenting, that our love would increase, that it would overflow for one another, for our families, for our communities. And that that would be the sign that people can look at and say, you know, that as that old song says, they'll know we are Christians by our love. And it is so true in the way that we love one another, in the way that we are kind to one another. That just speaks volumes, Lord, about your love for us. I pray that we really would, as Paul writes in Ephesians, make the most of every opportunity. I pray we would live lives marked with wisdom, that we would, as he goes on in that same chapter, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Let our marriages, let our families, let our friendships be marked by that mutual submission, by that desire to not look just to our own interests, but to the interests of others, just being humble, God. Let us live humble lives, glorifying you, looking out for one another, and growing in the knowledge and grace of your son, Jesus Christ. It's in his name we pray. Amen.   Laura Dugger: (59:44 - 59:47) Amen, Jodie. Thank you so much for being my guest.   Jodie Berndt: (59:47 - 59:55) Laura, thank you so much, and Lord bless you in the work that you are doing to just equip and encourage so many. It's just wonderful.   Laura Dugger: (59:55 - 1:03:39) Thank you. One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin.   This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you.   Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray.   Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him.   And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started.   First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process.   And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.   And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

Relationships don’t fall apart because of a lack of love—they struggle because of a lack of skill. So says author and counselor, Debra Fileta. If you are dating or you’re engaged, she will help you develop the skills to stop ignoring the red flags and start building a healthy foundation. And the skills are just as important for married couples. Hear the relational encouragement on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resources:Relationship Skills: The Four Seasons That Will Make or Break Your Love Life by Debra Fileta September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here. Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How can recognizing emotional abuse, rebuilding trust in yourself, and setting healthy boundaries help break harmful family patterns? Tune in for an inspiring discussion with Beverly Engel, LMFT, on her upcoming book Adult Children of Emotionally Abusive Families: Overcoming the Pain, Dysfunction, and Trauma of Growing up in a Toxic Family.Moments with Marianne Radio Show airs in the Southern California area on KMET1490AM & 98.1 FM, an ABC Talk News Radio Affiliate!  https://www.kmet1490am.com Beverly Engel, LMFT is an internationally recognized psychotherapist and expert on the subject of trauma. She has written numerous books on the related subjects of abuse, shame and empowerment, including The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, Healing Your Emotional Self and It Wasn't Your Fault. She has a blog on Psychology Today entitled, “The Compassion Chronicles,” and her writing has been featured in publications including Oprah Magazine, Cosmopolitan, The Washington Post, The Chicago Tribune, and The Los Angeles Times. https://beverlyengel.com Pre-Order on Amazon: https://a.co/d/0j3iU3zX Discover inspiring conversations with today's leading authors, celebrities, thought leaders, and change makers. To learn more about the Moments with Marianne Radio Show, explore guest interview opportunities, connect with Marianne, and follow her on social media, visit https://www.mariannepestana.comExplore the Moments with Marianne Book Club and find your next great read: https://www.mariannepestana.com/book-club/Listen to the Moments with Marianne Radio Show on KMET 1490AM & 98.1FM, an ABC News Radio Affiliate, weekdays at 8:06 AM PT / 11:06 AM ET and Sundays at 10:06 AM PT / 1:06 PM ET. Learn more at: https://www.kmet1490am.com/moments-with-marianne

Tell us about your grandmother’s hands. That’s our topic on Chris Fabry Live. The idea comes from a song released 55 years ago by Bill Withers. It was a tribute to his maternal grandmother, Lula Carter Galloway. Author Jeff Crosby wrote about that song in a new book and he’ll give his own perspective of his grandmother—then it’s your turn. Don’t miss a perfect Friday conversation. Featured resources:The Spirit in the Sky: The Power of Music in Our Search for Graceland by Jeff Crosby Song: "Grandma's Hands" by Bill Withers September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dr. Sam Chan is on a mission to help you share the good news of Jesus to a skeptical world. He’s a medical doctor, cultural analyst and speaker who has a heart for non-Christians. How do you talk about Jesus without becoming “that guy?” And why does trying to be a better person lead to bitterness, anger and burnout? Hear a liberating message of hope on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:How to Talk About Jesus Without Being THAT Guy by Sam Chan September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Retired Long Beach Fire Captain James Owen spent his career running toward other people's emergencies while addiction, trauma, and post-traumatic stress were building behind the badge.In this episode of The Hopeaholics, James opens up about the murder of his close friend and fellow firefighter Captain Dave Rosa, surviving a motorcycle crash that broke his neck, losing and rebuilding his sobriety, and the realization that ultimately changed his life: after spending his career trying to save everyone else, the last patient he needed to save was himself.James joined the Long Beach Fire Department and built the career he had dreamed about, eventually becoming a fire captain. But as the job became more of his identity, his recovery began to disappear. After years of sobriety, James found himself drinking again while dealing with divorce, overwhelming stress, internal investigations, traumatic calls, and the cumulative weight of life as a first responder.James also discusses first responder PTSD and suicide, Alcoholics Anonymous, Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACA), nonlinear recovery, alternative recovery modalities, the importance of continuing to seek new ways to heal, and his book, The Last Patient.Firefighter PTSD, Addiction & the Cost of Being "Tough" w/ James Owen | The Hopeaholics Podcast #363

Don't miss the return of those boys of the Bible, they put the chat in eschatology and the air in inerrancy—Dr. Michael Rydelnik and Dr. Michael Vanlaningham—that's right, the two Michaels return to Chris Fabry Live! We'll entertain your biblical questions about heaven, prophecy, the Christian life, or some difficult passage you're struggling with. Maybe it's a difference in theology you have with a friend. Join the biblical fun with the two Michaels on Chris Fabry Live. Resources mentioned:Open Line Live - Grand Rapids, Michigan: Sept 26Summit on Antisemitism, November 7, 2026Moody Bible Commentary: excerpt of Daniel and Romans September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Kristen is joined by Dr. Daniel Lobel, author and internationally recognized expert on the diagnosis and treatment of borderline personality disorder (BPD), to explore how BPD can affect relationships and how loved ones can move beyond walking on eggshells.   You will learn: What borderline personality disorder (BPD) can look like in close relationships. Why fear of abandonment can lead to intense emotional reactions. How black-and-white thinking can affect relationships and self-perception. How enabling and "walking on eggshells" can reinforce unhealthy patterns. How setting consistent boundaries and reinforcing healthy behavior can help create healthier relationships. Connect with Dr, Daniel Lobel: mMysideofthecouch.com   When you purchase Dr. Daniel Lobel's books through these Amazon affiliate links, you're helping support the podcast at no extra cost to you:    1. Adult Children of Borderline Parents 2. When Your Daughter Has BPD: Essential Skills to Help Families Manage Borderline Personality Disorder 3. When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder: A Guide for Adult Children 4. When a Loved One Has Borderline Personality Disorder: A Compassionate Guide to Building a Healthy and Supportive Relationship 5. Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents: How to Help Your Child (of Any Age) with Borderline Personality Disorder without Losing Yourself   Subscribe HERE and get a free 5-day journal to begin closing the chapter on what doesn't serve you and open the door to the real you. Connect with Kristen: Get Kristen's newsletter, packed with tangible tools, resources, and inspiration Watch the episodes on YouTube Follow Kristen on Instagram   Kristen's TikTok   Have Kristen Speak at Your Event  Disclaimer This information is being provided to you for educational and informational purposes only. It is being provided to you to educate you about ideas on stress management and as a self-help tool for your own use. It is not psychotherapy/counseling in any form. This information is to be used at your own risk based on your own judgment. For counseling services near Indianapolis, IN, visit www.pathwaystohealingcounseling.com. Pathways to Healing Counseling's vision is to provide warm, caring, compassionate and life-changing counseling services and educational programs to individuals, couples and families in order to create learning, healing and growth.

"She's okay — the car isn't." One phone call about our daughter's accident exposed just how differently Snooks and Lovey respond to a crisis... and it almost turned into an argument. In this episode, married couple and marriage coaches Snooks and Lovey get real about what happens when your adult children move back home (or never fully leave). With over 25 million adults under 35 living with a parent in 2025, "boomerang kids" aren't rare — they're the new normal, and they're testing marriages everywhere. Snooks and Lovey (married 30+ years) pull back the curtain on their own household: house rules for adult kids, the sleepover debate, why vacations are off-limits, and the real story of Keanna's car accident that revealed their opposite DISC personalities in real time. Out of that moment, Snooks created the "CRAZY" framework — Compassion, Real, Accountability, Zealousness, and Yield — a practical tool for any couple navigating parenting disagreements, blended families, or high-stress "what-if" moments. This episode covers financial literacy for adult kids at home, setting boundaries without losing connection, why couples must discuss "what-ifs" before the crisis hits, and how to stay a united front in front of your children — even when you don't agree behind closed doors. 

Communication has never been easier than in our digital world. But some people are rediscovering a lost art, and our correspondent to culture Dr. Rosalie de Rosset will talk about it. The lost art is letter writing. Why is a handwritten letter so powerful? Have you saved a letter like that to read and reread? Rosie says letter writing is good for the soul. Find out why on Chris Fabry Live. September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Why Adult Children Defend Toxic Parents (Narcissistic Abuse & Codependency Recovery) Have you ever caught yourself saying, "My childhood wasn't that bad," while quietly struggling with chronic anxiety, intense people-pleasing, emotional overwhelm, or a string of toxic relationships? Do you constantly minimize your own pain, compulsively defend the parents who hurt you, or experience overwhelming guilt for even questioning your upbringing? If so, please know that you are not crazy. You are navigating a deeply ingrained biological response: you learned to protect vital family attachment by abandoning your own reality.   In this powerful live workshop episode of the Breakdown to Breakthroughs Podcast , Breakthrough Life Coach Lisa A. Romano explores why adult children of narcissists, alcoholics, and emotionally immature parents spend decades rationalizing family trauma. Through deep psychological insight and trauma-informed nervous system awareness, Lisa breaks down the mechanics of cognitive dissonance, subconscious survival programming, and codependency. This discussion is not about placing blame—it is about restoring radical honesty to your healing journey.

How do you heal what you can’t erase? Chris Cook believes most people stay stuck in the pain and trauma they’ve been through not because they haven’t tried hard to move on, but because the approaches to healing never reach the soul where wounds linger. Is there a soul-wound that hasn’t healed in your life? Hear help and hope on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:Healing What You Can't Erase by Christopher Cook September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Send us Fan MailWhat if the constant sense that something is wrong with you was never about you at all, but about the family system you had to bend yourself around to survive?In this episode, we unpack what it means to be the adult child of a mother with NPD or BPD, starting with what the DSM actually says about each disorder and why narcissistic traits are not the same as a clinical diagnosis. We talk about how the entire family contorts around the illness, how collusion and gaslighting leave you feeling like the black sheep, and how growing up without room to develop a self can lead to identity crises decades later. We also cover where to find support if you recognize yourself in any of this.Here's a related episode that builds on today's conversation: #539 | How Shame Prevents the Cycle of Motivation - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/539-how-shame-prevents-the-cycle-of-motivation/id1511831621?i=1000789504920Learn more about:

TODAY'S TREASUREFear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10Send us a comment!Support the show

Boaz shares her experience, strength, and hope about recovering from growing up in an alcoholic / dysfunctional home using the 12 steps of Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACAD).

When your children become adults, your relationship with them has to change—but letting go isn't always easy.In Part 2, Dr. Sharon May and Jim Burns talk about boundaries, unsolicited advice, disappointment, adult children's partners, family tension, and what healthy connection looks like when your children no longer need you to manage their lives.Learn how to move from parenting your child to building a relationship with the adult they have become.

Need a little good news? Then don’t miss this edition of Chris Fabry Live! You’ll have the chance to talk about something good going on in your life. What is sparking delight for you? What have you waited for that’s now a reality? Did you finish a kitchen remodel? Fix something that was broken? Find something lost? Get the promotion you were hoping for? Has a relationship been restored? Share some good news on Chris Fabry Live. September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Send us an email @ info@parentcoachesunleashed.com Carrie Wiesenfeld and Jessica Anger welcome back Kim Muench, certified parent coach and founder of Real Life Parent Guide, to talk about her new book, Lost in Place: How to Support, Motivate, and Launch an Adult Child. The conversation focuses on what changes when kids become adults, especially when they are still living at home, struggling with independence, or dealing with mental health concerns.Kim Muench is a certified parent coach who specializes in helping parents of emerging and adult children navigate challenges involving independence, mental health, substance use, motivation, and the transition into adulthood. She is the founder of Real Life Parent Guide and the author of Lost in Place: How to Support, Motivate, and Launch an Adult Child.In this episode, Kim shares a practical, compassionate framework for parents who want to support their adult children without taking responsibility for their lives. The discussion covers boundaries, family dynamics, mental health, and how to respond when adult children push back.Key topicsKim explains why she prefers the term “lost in place” over “failure to launch,” framing the issue as a developmental delay rather than a final judgment.She defines “emerging adulthood” as the post-high-school phase before financial and physical independence, noting that it can now extend into the early 30s.The hosts and Kim discuss how adult children may boomerang home after living independently, creating emotional and financial strain for parents.Kim emphasizes that parents cannot control an adult child's behavior, only their own boundaries and responses.She introduces her four Cs framework for parents: clarity, calm, confidence, and consistency.In a financial rescue scenario, Kim advises parents to stop panicking, identify the pattern, and return responsibility to the adult child by asking, “What do you see are your options?”Kim discusses how fear of self-harm, guilt, and parents' inability to tolerate their own anxiety often keep them stuck in enabling patterns.For adult children struggling with anxiety or depression, Kim recommends assessing the actual level of functioning, the quality of the relationship, and whether professional support is in place.She suggests small relational shifts like pausing before replying to late-night text floods and building connection through low-pressure shared activities.When a parent sets a boundary and the adult child reacts angrily, Kim says the boundary is still valid and parents should not collapse under guilt or over-explain themselves.She explains that family living agreements can work well, but only if parents stay consistent and do not undermine one another.Kim encourages parents to see anger and other difficult emotions as part of the process, not as proof that they are doing something wrong.Her biggest takeaway: parents need an open mind and a willingness to shift out of old generational habits and into a more relational, less controlling approach.Link to Kim's new book, Lost in Place:How to Support, Motivate, and Launch an Adult Childhttps://a.co/d/02lbnnpU

I'm Jon Sanchez, and today we are talking about a retirement expense that almost nobody puts into their financial plan.It isn't healthcare.It isn't inflation.It isn't taxes.It isn't a stock-market correction.It's your adult children.That may sound harsh, but this is not a show about criticizing young adults. Housing is expensive. Groceries are expensive. Insurance, childcare, automobiles and borrowing costs have all become more difficult for young families.Many adult children are working hard and still struggling.And when your child calls and says:“Mom, I'm short on rent.”“Dad, my car broke down.”“We need help with a down payment.”“We can't afford daycare.”What parent doesn't want to help?But here is the question nobody wants to ask:At what point does helping your children begin jeopardizing your own retirement?A recent BMO survey found that 48% of parents and 41% of grandparents planned to financially assist their adult children. Even more revealing, 27% of Americans said parents should financially support their children for as long as they are alive.That means millions of retirement plans may contain an expense that was never included in the original calculation.Today, we're going to talk about how to help your family without becoming their permanent financial safety net—and how to recognize when love and guilt are making financial decisions that your retirement plan cannot afford.

One of the main criticisms of Christians, both inside and outside the church, is that they are too judgmental. Is that a fair criticism? Author and teacher Shannon Popkin answers that question and tackles the big finger pointing verse, “Judge not lest ye be judged.” She’s also concerned about believers being less judgmental of themselves. Hear biblical encouragement for your soul on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:Kinda Judgy: Finding Mercy for Myself and Others in Six Stories of the Bible by Shannon Popkin September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

She teaches advanced writing at Penn State. She’s an award-winning author. And on this edition of Chris Fabry Live, Dr. Heather Holleman takes us back to middle school. What she puts her characters through in her novel series for 10-14 year olds might be just what you need to hear in your season of life. How do you deal with the pressures of popularity, social media, friendship and the search for belonging? Don’t miss Wednesday’s Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:This Seat's Yours by Heather Holleman Resource mentioned: The Elita Brown Series by Heather Holleman September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The new show "Youth" stars Sharon Horgan as a woman navigating her dating life in the wake of divorce, and as she cares for her ailing parents and her immature son. Horgan discusses the show, which she created, wrote, and stars in. "Youth" premieres on HBO and HBO Max on Sunday, September 20. A new 118-track box set captures the recordings of blues legend Ma Rainey over a prolific five years. Historian David Sager, who provided the set's liner notes, and musician Gaye Adegbalola, who wrote the forward, discuss Ma Rainey: Mother Of The Blues, The Complete Paramount Recordings 1923-1928.'Youth' still photograph by Colin Hutton/HBO Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

He’s back! The voice that stops traffic when he speaks, Steve Brown returns with a message that has defined his life and ministry. He believes down to his soul that “God’s not mad at you.” And we’ll talk about the power the enemy has over us when we get stuck in our guilt, shame, fear and regret. Don’t miss a freeing, fresh conversation with Steve Brown on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:God's Not Mad at You: Confronting the Lies of Guilt, Shame, Fear, and Regret by Steve Brown September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Send us Fan MailTrue legacy building requires an intentional mindset shift away from individualistic Western norms and toward an interdependent, multi-generational family mission. In this episode, guest Chris Patton shares his transformative journey from planning a comfortable mountain retirement tobuilding an enterprise engineered to fund kingdom ministry across five generations. The core message underscores that practical stewardship is not just about writing a traditional will, but about building governance, cultivating marital alignment, and bringing adult children into a collaborative, kingdom-minded covenant.KEY EPISODE TAKEAWAYS● How Do You Shift a Family from Independence to Interdependence?To move away from Western individualist cultural habits, a family must transition from launching completely autonomous individuals to cultivating a unified family team on an active spiritual and business mission.○ Deep-Dive Context: Cultural frameworks suggest that parenting effectively stops at age 18, releasing children to live entirely independent lives. True legacy leaders recognize that while parental authority ends when children reach adulthood, spiritual and structural influence continues across multiple decades to unite the family around a larger purpose.○ The Biblical / Stewardship Principle: This mirrors the scriptural patterns of families remaining structurally and spiritually bound to fulfill the greatest commandments and the Great Commission down through the lineages.● How Do You Introduce a Strategic Legacy Vision to Adult Children?Introducing a sweeping legacy shift to adult children begins by seeking their forgiveness for prioritizing cultural norms of separation, followed by presenting a compelling vision for a unified family enterprise while giving them total autonomy to opt in or out.○ Deep-Dive Context: When introducing this concept during a family vacation, Chris presented a detailed presentation highlighting their options: consuming their remaining wealth, blindly passing everything via a standard will, or intentionally investing into a collaborative family enterprise designed to steward resources collectively.○ The Biblical / Stewardship Principle: True biblical stewardship avoids dumping unvetted capital onto unprepared beneficiaries, looking instead to actively disciple and train the next generation to handle family resources.● What Role Does Spousal Alignment Play in Family Legacy Planning?Spousal alignment serves as the crucial foundation for legacy development, requiring spouses to learn together, process structural updates collaboratively, and actively adjust personal timelines to move forward as a unified front.○ Deep-Dive Context: Chris notes that it is his responsibility not to run out ahead of his wife, Kim, but to intentionally study multi-generational models alongside her. Embracing her distinct perspective ensures an accurate pulse on how their children will respond to structural family decisions.○ The Biblical / Stewardship Principle: This principle honors the design of marriage as a unified covenant where both partners combine their unique gifts to oversee what God has given them to steward.Support the show

In the 140-year history of the school that DL Moody founded, he is only the 11th president. We’ll have a conversation with the new leader of Moody Bible Institute, Dr. Rick Melson. He has a rich history in Christian higher education. What are the challenges and opportunities of leading a multi-faceted ministry like Moody? Hear his heart and vision for the future on Chris Fabry Live. Mentioned resource:Spiritual Leadership by J. Oswald Sanders September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How do you keep your kids wanting to hang out with you once they're grown up? Kevin talks to Todd Wilson of FamilyManWeb.com about the lessons learned in parenting "after graduation." They discuss knowing when to hand over the baton (and how not to drop it)…tactics for effectively influencing your kids (without driving them away)…and how to restore broken relationships (instead of not talking for months or years).

How do you keep your kids wanting to hang out with you once they're grown up? Kevin talks to Todd Wilson of FamilyManWeb.com about the lessons learned in parenting "after graduation." They discuss knowing when to hand over the baton (and how not to drop it)…tactics for effectively influencing your kids (without driving them away)…and how to restore broken relationships (instead of not talking for months or years).

How do you keep your kids wanting to hang out with you once they're grown up? Kevin talks to Todd Wilson of FamilyManWeb.com about the lessons learned in parenting "after graduation." They discuss knowing when to hand over the baton (and how not to drop it)…tactics for effectively influencing your kids (without driving them away)…and how to restore broken relationships (instead of not talking for months or years).

On this edition of Chris Fabry Live, a personal question for you. It’s been 25 years since that clear, September 11th morning when the world as we knew it changed forever. How are you observing this date and what it represents? Is there something you’re doing with others or on your own that you find helpful? Your observance might be just what someone needs to hear. September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Retirement Readiness Assessment: https://bit.ly/RetirementReadinessAssessment Join Our 2027 Masterclass! https://bit.ly/2027MasterclassWaitlist As parents, we spend decades trying to protect, guide, and support our children. But once they become adults, what they need from us begins to change. In this episode, we share seven heartfelt lessons we believe many adult children wish their parents understood, from offering more presence than advice and respecting their independence to having difficult conversations before it's too late, letting go of perfection, and creating meaningful moments they'll remember forever. These reflections come from our own experiences as both parents and adult children, and our hope is that they help you build even stronger relationships with the people you love most.#retirement_transformed #retirementcouple #retirement BUY MARK'S BOOK! The Evolving Man: Life Virtues Men Don't Talk About [Get the FREE Downsizing Guide] How to prepare to downsize your home https://learn.retirementtransformed.com/downsizing-guide-optin USEFUL FINANCIAL TOOLS https://geni.us/new_retirement Use this link for a FREE 14 Day Trial! [Get the FREE Downsizing Guide] How to prepare to downsize your home CONNECT: Engage in our Free Facebook Community ✔️ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/retirementtransformed ✔️ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/retirementtransformed ✔️ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/retirementtransformed ✔️ Amazon Shop: https://www.amazon.com/shop/retirementtransformed ABOUT RETIREMENT TRANSFORMED Husband and wife duo, Mark & Jody Rollins, inspire and serve as personal guides to meaningful, transformational journeys for individuals who are planning for, going through or are living in retirement. This is everything in retirement beyond your financial plan. We are not financial advisors or medical experts. Any advice we give is our own and should not be taken as professional advice. This video is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Please seek professional assistance before making any financial decisions or changes that can affect your physical or mental health. FTC: Some links mentioned above may be affiliate links, which means we earn a small commission if you buy a product from the specific link. This video is not sponsored. All Content and video segments are copyrighted and owned by ©Retirement Transformed and cannot be used without permission.

What do you do when your relationship with your adult child isn't what you hoped it would be? Maybe your child is struggling and you want to help, but your advice comes across as criticism. Maybe you disagree with their parenting choices, worry because they've walked away from the faith, or feel heartbroken because they've cut off contact altogether. In this conversation, Dr. Kathy Koch offers biblical wisdom and practical help for navigating these complicated relationships. You'll discover how your relationship with your children needs to change as they become adults, what heart posture to have toward them, and how to communicate in ways that build connection instead of conflict. Dr. Kathy also shares specific things to avoid saying when you're trying to coach an adult child, along with a few communication hacks to help you relate to them more effectively. Whether you're frustrated, discouraged, or grieving a relationship that isn't what you thought it would be, this conversation will remind you that there is still hope—and that you can love your adult children well, even when the relationship is hard. *** LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Heaven for Today: 60 Devotions on How the Life to Come Changes Your Life Right Now - book by Jennifer Rothschild Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children: Strategies and Conversations that Work - book by Dr. Kathy Koch   RELATED EPISODES Can I Navigate the Path of Parenting Adult Kids? with Mary DeMuth Can I Live a Full Life With an Empty Nest? With Jill Savage Can I Redefine the Second Half of My Life? With Dawn Barton Can I Find Purpose in My Next Season of Life? With Shayne Moore and Carolyn Castleberry Hux Can I Stop Being a Control Freak Mom? With Crystal Paine Can I Drop the Good Mom Myth? With Alli Worthington   SUBSCRIBE Get my weekly email Java with Jennifer, to be notified when a new episode releases. LET'S CONNECT Facebook | Instagram | X (Twitter) VISIT THE SHOW NOTES ON MY WEBSITE LEARN MORE

Dr. Chris Thurman says Jesus was the only perfectly healthy, sane person to walk this planet. On this edition of Chris Fabry Live, help and hope for you to become more like Jesus. Dr. Thurman points out a dozen principles for developing a more Christlike soul so we can experience closeness with others and live with meaning and purpose. Featured resource:The Way of the Soul: Becoming More Like Christ by Chris Thurman September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How do you live for Jesus in the trenches of everyday life? How do you make decisions about dating, marriage and money in ways that honor God? Author and speaker Dr. Lina AbuJamra tackles the concept of what it really means to follow Jesus. What does living by faith look like? How do you avoid caving to the pressures you face daily? Don't miss the practical, biblical encouragement on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:All Your Life: What It Really Means to Live for Jesus by Lina AbuJamra September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Cayla shares her experience, strength, and hope about recovering from growing up in an alcoholic / dysfunctional home using the 12 steps of Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACAD).

Don't miss a "better" program. Throughout Proverbs and the Psalms, writers use the word "better" at the beginning of a verse. "Better a little with fear of the Lord than great wealth with turmoil." Look at some life event or lesson you've learned through the years and write your own proverb. Start it with "better," and then share some wisdom living—Tuesday on Chris Fabry Live. September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is your invitation to meet someone special on Labor Day. Perhaps you've known this person for a long time, but you have no idea why they're on the planet, why he or she matters, and what they should do with their life. Who's the special person? It's YOU! Bill Hendricks provides practical steps you can take to become who God created you to be on Chris Fabry Live. Featured Resource:The Person Called You: Why You're Here, Why You Matter and What You Should Do with Your Life by Bill Hendricks September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A partner. A friend. A therapist. A faith community. Sometimes a voice online we will never meet. When our adult child begins to pull away, we often find ourselves searching for the person who changed them. In this episode, Dr. Janet Steinkamp looks honestly at the influence other people hold in our adult children's lives, including the ultimatums that can feel impossible, and gently offers a different question to ask.In This Episode•    Why who turned your adult child against us may not be the right question after        all•    The difference between healthy influence and unhealthy influence, and how to        tell them apart•    What to do when you are facing an ultimatum, the is it them or me moment•    Why trying to fight an influencer head-on so often backfires•    Where your actual power lies and how to respond (in unfamiliar conversations)        without escalating (or alienating)Voices From This Episode•    "One of the most common questions asked by estranged parents is, what happened to my son or daughter? Many describe watching their once independent, thoughtful, compassionate, loving adult child adopt beliefs, attitudes, or behaviors that seem unfamiliar or dramatically different from the person they knew. Often I hear this as fear, impatience, anger, resentment, accusations."•    "Healthy influence strengthens an individual's ability to think critically, to maintain multiple meaningful relationships, and make voluntary choices. Unhealthy influence, by contrast, narrows perspective, discourages independent thinking, and may reinforce fear, loyalty conflicts, and emotional dependency. Unhealthy influence oftentimes reduces the number of relationships and focuses on one or two primary relationships."•    "There's great wisdom in Michael Corleone's line from The Godfather: keep your friends close but your enemies closer. That applies in estrangement. That's not to say unhealthy influences or influencers in your child's life are enemies. It's only to recognize that alienating them will only make your situation worse."•    "If you are sitting with something that feels impossible right now, an ultimatum, a person you don't trust, a relationship you're afraid of losing, that is exactly the kind of situation I help parents work through one at a time."•    "Here's what I hope you carry away from this episode. Maybe the question, who influenced our adult child, is not the right question. Maybe it is how influence works and whether you can see it clearly enough and respond without escalating. That is where your power as a parent actually is." ConnectFind the show on YouTube at @DrJanetSteinkamp. If you know a parent who is quietly carrying this, share this episode with them.One Next StepIf you are sitting with something that feels impossible right now, an ultimatum, a person you do not trust, a relationship you are afraid of losing, that is exactly the kind of situation Dr. Janet helps parents work through one on one. You can find out how through the website.●Virtual Office Hours: https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/office-hours●60-Minute Consultation: https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/service-page/60-minute-consultation●Fall 2026 Workshops: https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/copy-of-classes●Writer's Lab: https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/writers-lab#FamilyEstrangement  #AdultChildren  #EstrangedParents  #ParentingAdultChildren  #Reconciliation  #FamilyHealing  #Ultimatums  #EstrangementRecovery  #WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway  #DrJanetSteinkamp  #FamilyRelationships  #HealingFromEstrangement  #ParentChildRelationship  #Boundaries  #Empathy LEARN MORE: WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.comProduced by Balancing Life's Issues.Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you!DISCLAIMERThe content of this podcast is based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. PROFESSIONAL STANDARDS: Dr. Janet SteinkampWhen Our Adult Children Walk Away with Dr. Janet Steinkamp explores healthy communication, ethical interaction, safe family relationships, and reciprocal (appropriate) boundaries. The podcast provides education and support for parents navigating family estrangement, communication breakdowns, grief, reconciliation efforts, healthy boundary development and adult family relationship dynamics.Dr. Janet Steinkamp's work emphasizes emotionally healthy communication, adult accountability, ethical and safe relationship practices, mutual respect and appropriate boundaries, voluntary communication and reconnection and safe and appropriate family systems. Listeners gain practical tools to improve communication, understand the dynamics of estrangement, and pursue emotional responsibility, compassion, and integrity. 

We're going to archives for a great Friday conversation about Shorty. Bud. Pooch. And Punkin. You'll even hear what Dr. Kathy Koch's nickname was. How did you get that nickname? Who gave it to you? Why did it stick? Has that nickname helped or hurt your self-image? You'll laugh and maybe shed a tear or two when you hear this "Best of Chris Fabry Live" conversation about nicknames! Resources mentioned:June Bug by Chris Fabry September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Can you trust God in the middle of your suffering? If life is more than you can handle right now, don’t miss this edition of Chris Fabry Live. Author and speaker, Nicole Jacobsmeyer has seen her share of health struggles, depression, and rejection. And she says, from experience on her North Carolina farm, that in the pain of your life, something good will grow. Don’t miss the encouragement for your soul. Featured Resource:Something Good Will Grow: Finding God's Heart in the Soil of Suffering by Nicole Jacobsmeyer September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dr. Kathy Koch is on a mission to help families find reconciliation. She returns to talk with adult children who have a fracture in their relationship with a mom or dad or both. What are the ramifications of cutting off your parents? What steps can that adult child take move toward communication—and how can parents encourage and not impede that movement? Hear help and hope on Chris Fabry Live. Featured Resource:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Let's go on a biblical treasure hunt with author and speaker Nancy Guthrie. She believes every book of the Bible, Old and New Testaments, provides an opportunity to encounter Jesus. If you've had a difficult time reading through the entirety of the Scriptures, Nancy has a resource to help you not only persevere, but also uncover the beauty and sufficiency of Christ. Join us for Chris Fabry Live. Featured Resource:Beholding Christ: A Daily Guide to Seeing Jesus in All of Scripture By Nancy GuthrieBeholding Christ events September thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

He was known as the Prince of Preachers. He wrote 135 books. He was a philanthropist and a man who still casts a long shadow on the Church. Author and pastor, Ray Rhodes, gives a sweeping view of the life and ministry of Charles Haddon Spurgeon. What was he like at home? What was it like to experience one of his messages? Don’t miss the conversation on Chris Fabry Live. Featured resource:Spurgeon by Ray Rhodes Jr. August thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jennifer Pepito is joined by Dr Kathy Koch to talk about raising healthy adult children and staying in relationship with them through trial-and-error parenting, making mistakes, and the four pillars to raise healthy children and the importance of choosing relationship whenever possible.  As any parent with more than one teenager knows, parenting — what you know and what you think you know — shifts dramatically as children come of age. So often parents either react to older children without flexibility, humility or grace and wonder why the formulas of the early years aren't working or they simply give up on parenting. Dr. Koch lays out the ways we can choose connection, learn with our children, and continue to gently shepherd them through their teenage years.  Episode sponsored by the Peaceful Press! Starting to plan for next year's schooling and looking for tips on how to homeschool?? Check out the Peaceful Press's free How to Start Homeschooling Booklet.   In this episode– Prayer, community, humility, and honesty The importance of apologizing to your children  The key to parenting adult children is having your identity right: first you in Christ, then you as a spouse, and finally you as a parent  If you enjoyed this conversation and want to learn more, check out Dr Kathy's newest book Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children  Don't forget you can get 10% off the Peaceful Press with code "Restoration10" You can learn more about Jennifer here- Jennifer's Instagram You can learn more about Dr Kathy Koch and her work here- Celebrate Kids  Some Amazon Affiliate Links.

It’s a "Best of Chris Fabry Live" conversation as verbivores unite! A verbivore enjoys words and you'll have fun as listeners tell the truth about their unknowing mispronunciations. Some listeners said a word incorrectly for years. The stories will make you smile and might bring a little learning to the Radio Backyard Fence. Hear an hour of verbal fun about mispronounced words on Chris Fabry Live. August thank you gift:Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children by Kathy Koch Chris Fabry Live is listener-supported. To support the program, click here.Become a Back Fence Partner: https://moodyradio.org/donateto/chrisfabrylive/partnersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode 2021 Brought to you by our incredible sponsor: Ethos: Protect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get up to $3 million in coverage in as little as 10 minutes at https://ethos.com/hardfactor. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.  00:00:00 Timestamps 00:04:53 The "Sniffany Lions" in State College are turning on each other as the cocaine investigation unfolds 00:23:33 Random mystery person drops MYSTERY HUMAN SKULL at Michigan Goodwill in the dead of night 00:29:10 It's PHRIDAY - Old Ironsides, Florida Bad Girls, Brazilian Adult Child Scam, and Smiling through the Broken Jaw 00:34:00 Update on the Man with the World's Smallest Penis (allegedly) For more head over to patreon.com/hardfactor for weekly bonus episodes and most importantly HAGFD! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jack is under a court order to provide financial support for his two adult children. Beyond the required payments, he has continued to give additional support in response to their requests and demands, but the ongoing pressure has left him feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, and close to ending the extra financial assistance.  Got a dilemma? Call 1-800-DR-LAURA / 1-800-375-2872 or make an appointment at DrLaura.com Follow on social media: Facebook.com/DrLaura Instagram.com/DrLauraProgram YouTube.com/DrLaura Join the Dr. Laura Family!! >> Receive my weekly newsletter, perks, and more! Sign up now, it's FREE > DrLaura.com Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.