Podcasts about certified recovery coach

Send us a Text Message.Ep 297, Being a Practitioner of Leadership is exhilarating and offers great insight into leadership.  Take aways include how to lead and how to craft your personal leadership style.  Our special guest, author, speaker and trainer Dwayne Roberts shares powerful stories as to how he became a more effective leader utilizing various training but also the use of the DISC.  ABOUT OUR GUESTMeet the CEO of Dwayne Roberts & Associates LLC, Founder of Men of Vision Colorado. US Army Staff Sergeant, Associate Pastor at Carrying Bread to the Multitude. Works with local organizations and aims to empower 1M men worldwide. Dwayne is a Certified Speaker, Coach, Trainer with the John Maxwell Team. He is also a Certified Speaker, Extreme Execution Coach with emphasizes the Flight Assessment and Human Behaviors with the Eric Thomas & Associates, and Certified Recovery Coach with emphasizes on Mental Health.Reach out to Tamika and Beautiful I Am at:Website: https://www.dwaynehroberts.comFacebook: @Dwayne Roberts YouTube: Dwayne Roberts LinkedIn:  Dwayne Roberts | LinkedInSUBSCRIBE & Watch our Videocast of "POWERFUL" on YouTube@BrigitteTransformsABOUT THE HOST: Brigitte is a successful behavior wealth strategist and an Extreme Execution Coach certified by Dr. Eric Thomas (New York Times best-selling author of You Owe You). If there is a need for transformation, she is your Partner in Success.  Book a consultation today to develop a mindset shift in your personal or professional life.  https://calendly.com/brigittebrownjackson/inquiry-call-for-servicesSupport the Show.If this show has blessed you, please LIKE, SHARE, and SUBSCRIBE. Give a REVIEW or provide us with feedback and show ideas at: https://brigittebrownjackson.com/podcast Support the PODCAST - Donate: Powerful (Powerful +) (buzzsprout.com)Find Brigitte Brown Jackson at:Website: https://brigittebrownjackson.comYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCS7vVHb-_jBIGG51ZgDbXyFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/BrigitteTransformsInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/BrigitteTransformsAmazon: https://www.amazon.com/author/brigittebrownjackson

It's not you, mama - it's the SYSTEM. You do NOT have to be a mom to get a ton out of this incredible conversation with author and recovery coach, Celeste Yvonne. We're talking about the mental load of motherhood, the patriarchy, priviledge, the slippery slope of "mommy wine culture", and numbing our burnout with unhealthy coping mechanisms. We're ALSO talking about tools to help us heal, and the magic of sober living (and I'm not just talking about alcohol). This might just be my favorite episode to date. ABOUT CELESTE: Celeste Yvonne is a writer and certified recovery coach (IAPRC). Her essays on parenting, the mental load of motherhood, mommy wine culture, and sobriety resonates with mothers everywhere and has been featured in the Washington Post, Good Morning America, Today Show, and Refinery 29, among others. Over five years sober and a founding host of the Sober Mom Squad, Celeste advocates for mothers who struggle with addiction and mental health. In her newest book, "It's Not About the Wine," Celeste pulls back the veil on what's really plaguing mothers, offers tangible tips for how to lighten your mental load, and paves a path forward for twenty-first-century parents. https://www.celesteyvonne.com/ https://www.instagram.com/theultimatemomchallenge/ https://linktr.ee/theultimatemomchallenge

Interested in getting 1:1 coaching support? Learn about my Coaching Program and book a free discovery call: https://www.jeremylipkowitz.com/introGET NOTIFIED WHEN DOORS OPEN TO UNHOOKED RECOVERY: https://jeremylipkowitz.mykajabi.com/unhookedConnect on Social:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jeremylipkowitz/Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeremylipkowitz/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/JeremyLipkowitz49. Arlina Allen - 12-Step Recovery and the God Question: Demystifying the 12 Steps  Welcome to another episode of the Unhooked podcast! I'm your host, Jeremy, and today, we have a truly special guest with us. Arlina Allen is a Certified Recovery Coach, the Founder of Sober Life School, and the host of the award-winning recovery podcast "The One Day At A Time Podcast," which she's been running since June 2016.In this episode, Arlina and I dive deep into her remarkable journey in addiction recovery. She shares her insights on identifying the root causes of addiction and alleviating unnecessary suffering. Arlina opens up about her own traumatic experiences from childhood and how they led her down the path of addiction as a coping mechanism.One of the core themes we explore is the idea that addiction is often a symptom of deeper issues. Arlina emphasizes the importance of addressing these underlying issues and discusses the role of 12-step programs in her own recovery journey. These programs provided her with a structured process for self-examination and self-compassion, which proved to be invaluable in her healing process.Throughout our conversation, we also touch on various aspects of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and the broader topic of addiction recovery. Arlina sheds light on why some individuals have strong reactions to terms like "alcoholic" and how it can be seen as both a badge of honor and a source of shame.We delve into the history of AA meetings and how the practice of introducing oneself as an alcoholic became a common tradition. The concept of powerlessness in AA and its relationship to addiction recovery is another point of discussion, with Arlina offering her unique perspective.Arlina shares her insights on the role of a higher power in the recovery process and highlights the importance of community and social support. Sharing one's struggles with others can be a powerful tool in preventing relapse.In our conversation, Arlina highlights several key takeaways, including:Misconceptions about AA and how reframing certain words and concepts can lead to a deeper understanding.The transformative process in recovery and how discomfort and resistance can ultimately lead to personal growth.An openness to different paths to recovery, beyond AA, including psychedelic-assisted therapies.The incredible power of service in the recovery journey, both for personal growth and helping others.A teaser for a future episode where Arlina plans to delve into the topic of resolving resentment in relationships, a subject that many individuals dealing with addiction and recovery can relate to.Sober Life School- http://www.soberlifeschool.comReinvent - Self Esteem Course http://www.selfesteemcourse.comPodcast http://www.odaatchat.comFB: facebook.com/odaatchat IG: @odaatpodcast @arlinaallenSo, without further ado, let's dive into this enlightening conversation with A

Are you curious about changing your relationship with alcohol? Whether you want to cut back, moderate, take a break or quit for good, putting down the bottle isn't easy. But help is at hand! Ange Chappel is a North Shore Mum who has recently launched a life-changing app called Mind The Sip – helping thousands of people re-evaluate the role of alcohol in their lives. Has a nightly wine crept into the bedtime routine with the kids? Do you try to not drink during the week, only to binge at the weekend? If you feel like alcohol has become a problem and you want to do something about it, this inspiring interview with Ange Chappel from Mind The Sip will help you take a step in the right direction.Ange joins Rachel and Sarah on The Parenting Couch podcast to share her top tips for cutting back on alcohol, including:Listen to sober curious podcasts.Stock the fridge with alcohol-free alternatives.Don't stop socialising – head out with a drinks plan and clear intention.Play the tape forward and imagine yourself leaving as fresh as you arrived.Become acquainted with “Quit-Lit” - a genre of literature for the sober curious.Journal your moods & triggers and celebrate your wins.Pop a guided mediation on to get out of your head and re-centre.About Ange ChappelAnge Chappel is the Founder of Mind The Sip & Certified Recovery Coach. Driven by a desire to find a solution that focuses on moderation rather than strict sobriety, Ange took the initiative to create Mind The Sip — an innovative alcohol reduction app.Through her work as Founder of Mind The Sip, Ange aims to inspire individuals to reassess their relationship with alcohol, improve their wellbeing, and unlock a brighter, more balanced future. Providing a platform that counts alcohol-free days, promotes moderation, and encourages long-term change.Ange's unwavering commitment and dedication to helping others make her a driving force in the field of alcohol reduction. Her vision and passion continue to make a profound impact on the lives of individuals seeking a mindful and healthier approach to drinking.Mind The SipMind The Sip is a mindful drinking app to help you reassess your relationship with alcohol. It provides you with the tools and resources to cement a lifestyle free from hangovers, regrets and excess expense. Their mission for all members is to drink mindfully and within the health guidelines, with it being your ultimate choice whether you wish to go all the way to zero.Download Mind The Sip appFollow Mind The Sip on Instagram or FacebookAnge RecommendsAlcohol Explained – William PorterHigher Sobriety – Jill StarkA Happier Hour – Rebecca Weller#theparentingcouch #theparentingcouchpodcast #parenting #northshoremums

Setting realistic goals can be a great way to stay motivated and achieve success. The best way to do this is to break down your goals into smaller, more manageable steps. Make sure your goals are challenging, but realistic and achievable. Also, set a timeline for yourself so you can measure your progress and celebrate your successes along the way. Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help from those around you if you feel like you need it.    Here to provide us with some tips on effectively setting goals while in recovery is Matt Williams. By accomplishing many goals of his own, Matt was able to get sober and start a successful business around his lifestyle. He is the founder of Fro Pro Snacks, legacy ambassador for lululemon, Podcast Host for Wake up the sun, Certified Recovery Coach, and much more. Guest: Matthew Williams Follow us on Instagram: @BanyanTreatmentCenters Like us on Facebook: @BanyanTreatmentCenters Subscribe to Youtube: @BanyanTreatmentCenters Visit our Website: www.banyancenters.com #goalsetting #newyearnewme #newyearsresolution #wedorecover #sober #sobriety  

On this episode of Let's Be Blunt, Montel speaks with Nekeidra Cromwell, the founder of the cannabis lifestyle brand KeidyWeedy. Nekeidra is a cannabis patient advocate, patient, caregiver and Certified Recovery Coach for The State of Maryland. She is a member of The United Empowerment Party, MdNorml, and MDMJ. Cannabis saved her life after brain surgery when she was prescribed over 4 different narcotics at the same time. Nekeidra no longer has seizures or blackouts and she is here to help eliminate the stigma of this healing plant.

In this episode, I talked to Vernon Layne the founder of That Christian In Recovery Podcast, a podcast that helps people with their own life's struggles and addictions. He is also a Certified Recovery Coach, Minister, and Speaker. Most importantly, he will bless us by talking how Jesus transformed his life by sharing his life testimony. He talked about how he dealt with addiction since he was young and ever since he had his first drink at around 10 years old, and how his wife left him after 16 years of being married. Do you want to know how important salvation to his life and what made him decide that he needs Jesus or what does rock bottom means and how do you get out of it? What is the difference in his life before and after? What did he say about taking ownership in his life? Listen for yourself as he answers the questions that I have mentioned and some more. To learn more about him or to contact Vernon you can go the following:https://www.podpage.com/that-christian-in-recovery/https://twitter.com/recovery_thathttps://www.instagram.com/thatchristianinrecovery/https://www.youtube.com/@thatchristianinrecovery7307To listen to the Part 2 of our interview, you have to go to https://www.buymeacoffee.com/cometojesus/part-2-special-guest-interview-vernon-layne. Our prayer is that you are blessed with our interview, and you realized how big and amazing God is not only in his life but yours.  We would love to hear from you so please send us a message in any of our social media links.I also would like to say thank you to our Spotify Sponsor for our music which is called "There was Jesus" by Zach Williams and Dolly Parton. Thank you again for listening and always remember to Come to Jesus Daily! Until next time stay blessed!Connect with us through our Social Media Links:Email us at cometojesuswithannette.mahal@gmail.com Twitter and Instagram: @AnnetteMahal FB: Come to JesusYou can help support our podcast ministry and partner with us reach further to build God's Kingdom through our Patreon account which is www.patreon.com/user/posts?u=81226509 or https://www.buymeacoffee.com/cometojesus

In this Episode: INTERVENTION: When What You're Doing Isn't Working with special guest Dana Golden Dana Golden is the co-author of "Addiction Rescue; The NO-BS Guide to Recovery" and a nationally known advocate for families struggling with Substance Use Disorder. Having lived on the other side of addiction for most of her life, she understands navigating through the wreckage that addiction causes. Her passion is bringing hope, healing, and inspiration to others living with SUD. Dana is a Certified Family Recovery Coach, Certified Recovery Coach, interventionist, and a public speaker. __________________ Saving You is Killing Me: Loving Someone with an Addiction  Book Youtube Podcast Meetings Support Group Coaching Resilience Course  Community https://linktr.ee/SYKM We are your resource, support, and network to help you Tap Back Into Your Power. Has someone else's problem become your problem? Does loving someone with addiction leaves you feeling broken, exhausted, and disappointed?  It hurts when you love someone who drinks too much or suffers from an addiction. Life is not normal. You may feel alone but are not unique in your pain or dilemma. Nor are you isolated in this situation. Saving You Is Killing Me is a helpful guide to light a darkened path. Loving someone with an addiction is emotionally, psychologically, and physically draining. You must understand that nobody deserves to suffer - you have the right to live a peaceful and fulfilled life full of love! You can, and you will find happiness again! Your journey starts by taking back your power and shifting the focus back onto you! With compassion and grace, a positive psychology practitioner and the author of Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone With An Addiction, Andrea Seydel, offers support by sharing her personal experiences and the knowledge she used to help navigate the wreckage of her struggle. She exposes the tremendous power of how our relationships can both hurt us and allow us to heal. Trauma is a fact of life, and navigating the turmoil of loving someone with an addiction can be extremely challenging. Saving You Is Killing Me offers new hope for reclaiming your life. Seydel offers insight and learning opportunities for self-healing, recovery, and resilience that foster an empowering way of life. For more support and information or to share your story of strength, head over to the website:  www.savingyouiskillingme.com Join us in the private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/savingyouiskillingme Get your copy of Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone With an Addiction Book: 

David Marion and Dana Golden are ex-spouses and the co-authors of, Addiction Rescue; The NO-BS Guide to Recovery. David, having lived through multiple addictions, among them, opioids and gambling, lost everything from his family to his multi-million dollar brokerage firm to five years of his life in federal prison all due his addictions. He is now a nationally recognized Public Speaker, Certified Intervention Professional and Certified Recovery Coach. He has worked with PBS with the Hold On To Hope documentary and the CDC on their RX Awareness Campaign, which has won several awards including an Emmy. Dana lived the other side of addiction; navigating through the wreckage David caused her and their two daughters as she kept wellness and balance in a home with active addiction. She is now a Certified Family Addiction Coach and Certified Recovery Coach. They are passionate about spreading their message of hope, healing and inspiration in working with the families affected by Substance Use Disorder.  To learn more about David and Dana and to purchase their book visit www.theliferecoverycoach.com 

In this exicting and often nail biting episode, Dana Golden & David Marion talk about how business success grew from just money to drugs, destruction, death, prison, and ultimately, gaining more than they could ever imagine. You will not believe what happened until you listen to this episode! David Marion and Dana Golden are ex-spouses and the co-authors of, Addiction Rescue; The NO-BS Guide to Recovery. David, having lived through multiple addictions, among them, opioids and gambling, lost everything from his family to his multi-million dollar brokerage firm to five years of his life in federal prison all due his addictions. He is now a nationally recognized Public Speaker, Certified Intervention Professional and Certified Recovery Coach. He has worked with PBS with the Hold On To Hope documentary and the CDC on their RX Awareness Campaign, which has won several awards, including an Emmy. Dana lived the other side of addiction; navigating through the wreckage David caused her and their two daughters as she kept wellness and balance in a home with active addiction. She is now a Certified Family Addiction Coach and Certified Recovery Coach. They are passionate about spreading their message of hope, healing and inspiration in working with the families affected by Substance Use Disorder. Learn more at: https://www.theliferecoverycoach.com/

Have you ever faced addiction? Do you know someone who has? If so, this emotionally deep episode is for you! Listen in as Dana and David share how addiction detroyed their family but then brought them back together. David Marion and Dana Golden are ex-spouses and the co-authors of, Addiction Rescue; The NO-BS Guide to Recovery. David, having lived through multiple addictions, among them, opioids and gambling, lost everything from his family to his multi-million dollar brokerage firm to five years of his life in federal prison all due his addictions. He is now a nationally recognized Public Speaker, Certified Intervention Professional and Certified Recovery Coach. He has worked with PBS with the Hold On To Hope documentary and the CDC on their RX Awareness Campaign, which has won several awards, including an Emmy. Dana lived the other side of addiction; navigating through the wreckage David caused her and their two daughters as she kept wellness and balance in a home with active addiction. She is now a Certified Family Addiction Coach and Certified Recovery Coach. They are passionate about spreading their message of hope, healing and inspiration in working with the families affected by Substance Use Disorder. Learn more at: https://www.theliferecoverycoach.com/ Get your copy of the Self-Worth Book HERE Help us by donating to our cause today! Donate Here Join the Facebook Group Here https://www.facebook.com/groups/fromnoworthtoselfworth  

David Marion and Dana Golden are the co-authors of, Addiction Rescue; The NO-BS Guide to Recovery. David, having lived through multiple addictions, among them, opioids and gambling, lost everything from his family to his multi-million dollar brokerage firm to five years of his life in federal prison all due his addictions. He is now a nationally recognized Public Speaker, Certified Intervention Professional and Certified Recovery Coach. Dana lived the other side of addiction; navigating through the wreckage David caused her and their two daughters as she kept wellness and balance in a home with active addiction. She is now a Certified Family Recovery Coach and Certified Recovery Coach. They are passionate about spreading their message of hope and healing and working with the families affected by Substance Use Disorder.

Special Featured Guest Sherry Gaba, LCSWPsychotherapist, Life Coach, Certified Recovery Coach, Author, Host And Expert Specializing In Individual, Couples, Family, And Group Psychotherapy. Sherry Is The Author Of The Ground-Breaking And Award-Winning Books, "The Law Of Sobriety: Attracting Positive Energy For A Powerful Recovery," And “Love Smacked.” Sherry Writes For Deepak Chopra's INTENT Blog, On Beliefnet, The Number One Spirituality Site On The Web, And For Counselor Magazine Online As Well Her Own BLOG. Our Guest Was The Go-To Expert For Dr. Drew Pinsky's Celebrity Rehab Show On VH1 And Later On The Spin-Off, VH1's Sober House As Well As Celebrity Rehab's Sex Addiction.In Addition, Sherry Is An Often Requested Speaker In Person And On Global Internet Teleseminars And Has Presented At National Conferences And To General Audiences On Numerous Topics. She Is The Host Of The Recovery Today Summit And Co-Host On The Kvta Am Radio Show, The Brighter Side Of Recovery: Families And Couples In Crises.Sherry Was The Go-To Expert For Dr. Drew Pinsky's Celebrity Rehab Show On Vh1 And Later On The Spin-Off, Vh1's Sober House As Well As Celebrity Rehab's Sex Addiction.Sherry Is The Author Of The Ground-Breaking And Award-Winning Book, The Law Of Sobriety: Attracting Positive Energy For A Powerful Recovery. Sherry Writes For Deepak Chopra's Intent Blog, On Beliefnet, The Number One Spirituality Site On The Web, And For Counselor Magazine Online As Well Her Own Blog.Narcissistic Partners And Obsessive Love Ebook & Quiz:Https://Sherrygaba.Com/NpquizMembership Coaching Program:Wake-Up Recovery An Online Group Coaching Program That Applies The Principals Of Positive Psychology, Law Of Attraction, And Mindfulness For Codependents, Love Addicts, And Toxic Relationships. Includes $1 One Month Https://Wakeuprecovery.Com/Ig1Guest Website: sherrygaba.com

One size doesn't fit all in recovery. Finding people and programs that work for you is all that matters. Carrie Szulczewski is a Certified Recovery Coach and Program Coordinator for Bridges Community Center, a program of Kenosha Human Development Services. Carrie discusses SMART Recovery support groups and the many other programs available at Bridges Community Center in Kenosha, Wisconsin. If you are interested in learning more about SMART Recovery, information is available at https://www.smartrecovery.org and if you are interested in any of the Bridges Community Center services, more information is available on the website at https://www.namikenosha.org/bridges.html or on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Bridges57187thave/

From drug addiction to being a victim of domestic/narcism abuse, Mandy talks about it all!Mandy is now thriving in her recovery and helping others through her sharing her story and working as a Certified Recovery Coach.-In loving memory of Justin Irick-

Episode 193  It's never too late to change careers and face your fears.  My guest Katie McKenna knows what it's like to face her fear and put herself out into the workforce after a divorce as a single mom to two beautiful girls. My friend Katie McKenna is joining the podcast for the second time. Katie is a Certified Recovery Coach, and Accountable Recovery Specialist at You Are Accountable, an online platform to help support women and men in recovery through toxicology screenings, weekly accountability check-ins, and Peer Recovery support groups.  As a woman in long-term recovery, Katie has the heart, drive, and passion to help others lead a life of sustainable recovery. What you'll discover:    What life was like when she got sober at a young age   Katie's divorce and how it changed her career path   How the stress of the pandemic and unemployment ending led Katie to work with a business coach   Being a single stay at home mom and how that took a toll on her self-esteem   How Katie felt her identity was *not* a professional in the workforce  Breaking through the fear of not having a resume  How her Career Coach led her to find a career she loves, and have to have more confidence in herself   Connect with Katie: Katie's past episode: An Insight into the Church of Scientology  You Are Accountable  Katie's Instagram Katie's Business Coach, Cindy Lish        Let's stay in touch. Join my email community for once-a-week emails to help you live a better life alcohol-free. Join:  Join My Email Community   Connect With Lori! Email: hellolori@lorimassicot.com Website:  The Midlife Sobriety Coach for Women. Get Sober Later in Life.   Are you ready to work on the relationship with yourself instead of alcohol? Request a 30-minute self-discovery to learn how coaching can help you stop drinking and create an alcohol-free lifestyle that fires you up!   Free 30-Minute Self-Discovery call: Life and Sobriety Coaching Services and Support for Midlife Women   Thank you so much for listening. You can check out this episode and others on LoriMassicot.com. Please consider subscribing to our community on social platforms and sharing with your friends! Have a great week! xo Lori          

I interviewed Matt Gardiner. Matt is an Entrepreneur,  Owner/Operator of ‘Electric Soil Recordings, Audio Producer,  Engineer, Singer/Songwriter, Guitarist & Vocalist of the International Recording Artists ‘Ground Level Falcons', Creative Coach, a Level two Certified Recovery Coach,  a Certified Nutrition Recovery Coach, a level two Enlifted Coach and host of several podcast. Matt has designed a program with just 10 minutes a day you can increase your skill acquisition by double, without changing your current lifestyle.  The Creative Mind Conservatory teaches you how to re-engage any forgotten hobby and how to engage in the pursuit of that Elusive Dream without Inhibitions or Procrastination!  I encourage every listener to follow him and his teachings.Everyone has a story, and this is his story.Below are the sites that house his workhttps://drive.google.com/file/d/1epiBbY8l2oBpuhWzG1Z2JiJFUVms0eVy/view?usp=sharing https://www.instagram.com/mattgardiner780/https://www.facebook.com/mattgardinerLIVEhttps://www.facebook.com/MattGardinerCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@mattgardiner780?lang=enVisit our Threads store:  https://threads-of-enlightenment.myshopify.com/We shop worldwide to find some of the highest-quality and some limited hard-to-find products online for you. We work closely with many suppliers to get the lowest prices. Enjoy our store!!!!!!. Proozy Proozy helps you stay equipped for life by transforming the way people shop, Diamond CBD The main focus is to research and develop innovative CBD hemp extracts, making them accessible.Sol de Janeiro Body-loving products, addictive scents, and luxurious textures to touch all your senses.Goode Health personalized nutrition that's effective, convenient, and affordable — because everyone deserves gooDisclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=2QSM5QR4P2JQQ)

A look back at our favorite 2021 interviews!  JANUARY 2021 Lori heats things up by talking all things money (and personal “hall passes”) with Certified Money and Recovery Coach, Linda Parmar. Here are a few major discussions in this episode: having a better relationship with your money having a fresh start with finances, mindset and new ideas DEBT is a four-letter word (and not the like the ones I say all the time) Certain behaviors associated with addiction and/or overspending addiction transference (fancy word for trading your addiction) NICHE... how the F@ck do you pronounce this word? Resolutions can be triggering, lets focus on starting fresh Be inspired by money A few words from Linda: “Big things have happened. I have recently left my job as a Financial Advisor that I had for 20 years. I left my position as I had been doing my money coaching on the side for two years. Money Coaching is my passion, and it became clear to me on what I needed to pursue full time. I love what I do. Let's back up a bit, I want you to know where I have come from and where I am now. I was a financial disaster. Yes, you read that right, a DISASTER. I worked in the financial industry but I wasn't paying attention. I got sober in March 2014. I wish I could tell you that when this happened it got better. It did not. It actually got worse regarding my spending. I was looking for things outside of myself to make myself happy. I was emotionally spending money; impulsive buying was something I was VERY familiar with. In 2016 is when I really started to work on my spending issues and my passion of my recovery really started. My mentor suggested I become a money coach. That initially felt like I would be a fraud since I was such a mess financially. Someone said to me "Sometimes you need to teach what you have to learn". Life changing moment. I started my money coach training which involved me getting my own money coaching. I got the opportunity to really work through my "stuff" and it was life changing. I continued to finish my Money Coaching Certification and in the meantime I also completed my She Recovers® Coach training and my Certified Recovery Coach training. I officially became a Recovery Coach that specializes in Financial Recovery. I continue everyday to work my Financial Recovery and focus on what is right for me and my relationship with money. It is such beautiful experience and I love that my life now involves everything money! So grateful. My coaching style is to really focus on your relationship with money. I love to start with how you currently feel about money and focus on what you want to change and how to do that. If we can change our behaviours then the numbers will change with it. I love getting specific with my clients on goals THEY want to achieve and what feels good to them. It starts with the foundation on how you feel and what you want to change. Running numbers can be overwhelming but it gets ALOT easier when you know why you want to pay attention to your money. I am living proof that you can turn your story around. I never thought I would feel financially free. I never thought it was possible. It is. You're worth it.  Linda xo" LINDA PARMAR https://www.instagram.com/lindaparmarcoach/ https://www.facebook.com/lindaparmarcoaching/ Your Money, Your Recovery Podcast:  Podcast (lindaparmar.com)    FOR ALL THINGS THE RECOVERY HOUR: therecoveryhour.com loriwindfeldt.com IG: @the.recovery.hour.podcast FB: @therecoveryhourpodcast

Theresa is a Certified Recovery Coach, Yoga Teacher, and Entrepreneur. Theresa helps teens, college students, and young adults reach their physical, mental, and spiritual goals. Theresa focuses on a holistic and soul-centered approach to healing. Her own recovery journey has paved the way to help her build her own business called The Warrior Within and help hundreds of people receive the love, support, and resources they need to live their best and fullest life. In today's episode we dive into learning about the incredible Masters program that Theresa is enrolled in through Columbia University. This program is one of the first of it's kind and is called The Spirituality Mind Body Institute. We discuss the science of spirituality and the cutting edge information that is being revealed to her in her program about who we are and why we are here. Website: https://thewarriorwithin.co/ Social Media: https://www.instagram.com/theresagiglio/ Don't forget to rate and review the podcast, it means so much to us and helps the show to get more listeners! Head over to your apple podcast app and rate and leave a review!! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thewoocast/message

— The brain has the ability to protect and heal itself much the same way our bodies are designed to heal after a physical wound. The important thing to remember is that your own brain will be doing the healing and you are the one in control. Valeria Teles interviews Ginny Gray - LCSW, Certified EMDR Therapist, Certified Recovery Coach, And Speaker Ginny Gray She is a clinical therapist specializing in addiction and trauma. Her experience with individuals and group counseling is extensive. She began her career at Family Centers in Greenwich and Darien, CT, while also interning at Arms Acres in the Bronx, NY  providing substance abuse prevention and counseling for children in residential foster care. From 2008 through 2020 she was the addiction and trauma specialist for The Center for Hope and Renewal in Greenwich, CT providing counseling to children, adolescents and families in Fairfield and Westchester counties. Ginny started Hand in Hand Counseling in 2021. Ginny grew up in New York City, attended Phillips Academy (Andover), Hollins University, and earned my Masters in Social Work at NYU. She is an avid and competitive athlete and mother to two grown children. To learn more about Ginny Gray and her work, please visit: https://www.handinhandcounselingct.com/     — This podcast is a quest for well-being, a quest for a meaningful life through the exploration of fundamental truths, enlightening ideas, insights on physical, mental, and spiritual health. The inspiration is Love. The aspiration is to awaken new ways of thinking that can lead us to a new way of being, being well.   

Allie Nunzi is a Senior Organizational Development Coach for Nunzi Consulting Co. She is the Founder of Grace & Glory Yoga, a family of yoga studios in New Jersey and Philadelphia. In 2017, she co-founded The Leadership Studio of Atlantic City, a non-profit that seeks to elevate the physical, energetic, spiritual, and financial wellbeing of the entire community. Allie is a Certified Lightyear Leadership Coach, a Certified Recovery Coach, a mom to Lulu and Joey, a wife to Ray, and an enneagram 3w4 that is sometimes a 4w3. You can listen to her podcast This Human Experience and discover the thread that connects us all. Connect with Allie:On IG @allienunzi

In episode five of Colors of Recovery, Zina and Tania have a conversation with Shari Hampton, Anti-Racism Trainer, and Ester Nicholson,  Anti-Racism Healer, both trusted advisors with the SHE RECOVERS Foundation. Learn how their complementary training and healing work is a necessary first step in achieving recovery and wellness for both treatment professionals and the patients they serve.  Resources:Shari is a Trusted Advisor for SHE RECOVERS Foundation and an anti-racist consultant who works with recovery and treatment organizations to help them explore their own biases and create pathways to greater diversity, equity and inclusion. She is the founder of Served Up Sober, a non-profit organization devoted to increasing healthy equity in marginalized communities by creating holistic spaces for women of color who are sober or sober curious. As a Certified Recovery Coach, Motivational Speaker, and woman in long-term recovery, Shari combines her years of professional and personal experience to offer a spiritually driven and empowered approach to healing. Ester Nicholson, Founder of Soul Recovery, author of Soul Recovery - 12 Keys to Healing Dependence, and She Recovers coach, turned her incredible journey from addiction to freedom into a practical program that heals the root causes of unworthiness, shame and trauma. Her life-changing program, Soul Recovery - The Roadmap Home, bridges the gap between the 12 Steps of Recovery and universal “spiritual” practices that have assisted thousands in recovering and rediscovering their essential nature of wholeness.  Ester's unique approach reveals the spiritual depth and healing power of the 12 steps and removes the stigma of addiction. Have feedback? Contact us at info@naatp.org

Sherry Gaba, LCSW is a Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Certified Recovery Coach specializing in individual, couples, family, and group psychotherapy. Find more of Sherry at: https://sherrygaba.com/product-category/ebooks/  E-books https://www.instagram.com/codependencycurious/https://wakeuprecovery.com/become-a-member-co1/     $1 trialhttps://wakeuprecovery.com/codependency-quiz/About Sarahhttps://sarahkramsey.com/about-sarah/​Join the FREE FB group Finding Love and Success After a Toxic Relationshiphttps://www.facebook.com/groups/lovea​...Before trying Sarah K Ramsey’s programs her clients were super embarrassed because on the outside these women appeared to have it all.  However, these women had a secret...they still felt mentally chained down by their toxic partner or parent.Most women think talk therapy is the only way to heal!  Unfortunately, these women waste years trying to figure out how codependency works, or rehashing their past in an office week after week trying to pick apart their childhoods.  But, Sarah’s clients aren’t “most people.”  They know overachievers aren’t just looking to talk about their problem, they are looking for an action plan to SOLVE their problems!Check out this FREE presentation where Sarah reveals how she does it!https://joinnow.live/s/Es9tIC​Check out what others have said about Sarah.https://sarahkramsey.com/programs/​Contact Sarahhttps://sarahkramsey.com/contact/

Drugs is a word that invokes fear and panic in many parents. What should you know? What does it actually look like? And why do you need to be educated about the risks? Join Dandelion as we meet with Rebecca from Breakthrough Recovery UK, a Certified Recovery Coach who gives us the low down on all things addiction. Find out more about Rebecca's work at www.breakthroughrecovery.co.uk or on Instagram at @breakthrough_recoveryuk. Learn more about risks to young people at https://dandeliontraininganddevelopment.com/

Adam Jablin is one of the best motivators in the recovery world. He's a certified recovery & life coach inspiring hundreds of thousands of people across the country. He's also the best-selling author of "Lotsaholic" where he shows you how overcome obstacles – no matter how large and to live a life rich in beauty, meaning, and purpose. 

Brad Miller is the Community Resource Officer of Plattsburgh City Police & a Certified Recovery Coach.  He works out of the Community Service Center on Margaret Street in Plattsburgh, NY.   Follow Plattsburgh City Police on Instagram @plattsburghpd

Lori heats things up by talking all things money (and personal “hall passes”) with Certified Money and Recovery Coach, Linda Parmar. Linda's upcoming Workshop “New Year, New Money” is FREE and you're invited! Here are a few major discussions in this episode: having a better relationship with your money having a fresh start with finances, mindset and new ideas DEBT is a four-letter word (and not the like the ones I say all the time) Certain behaviors associated with addiction and/or overspending addiction transference (fancy word for trading your addiction) NICHE... how the F@ck do you pronounce this word? Resolutions can be triggering, lets focus on starting fresh Be inspired by money A few words from Linda: “Big things have happened. I have recently left my job as a Financial Advisor that I had for 20 years. I left my position as I had been doing my money coaching on the side for two years. Money Coaching is my passion, and it became clear to me on what I needed to pursue full time. I love what I do. Let's back up a bit, I want you to know where I have come from and where I am now. I was a financial disaster. Yes, you read that right, a DISASTER. I worked in the financial industry but I wasn't paying attention. I got sober in March 2014. I wish I could tell you that when this happened it got better. It did not. It actually got worse regarding my spending. I was looking for things outside of myself to make myself happy. I was emotionally spending money; impulsive buying was something I was VERY familiar with. In 2016 is when I really started to work on my spending issues and my passion of my recovery really started. My mentor suggested I become a money coach. That initially felt like I would be a fraud since I was such a mess financially. Someone said to me "Sometimes you need to teach what you have to learn". Life changing moment. I started my money coach training which involved me getting my own money coaching. I got the opportunity to really work through my "stuff" and it was life changing. I continued to finish my Money Coaching Certification and in the meantime I also completed my She Recovers® Coach training and my Certified Recovery Coach training. I officially became a Recovery Coach that specializes in Financial Recovery. I continue everyday to work my Financial Recovery and focus on what is right for me and my relationship with money. It is such beautiful experience and I love that my life now involves everything money! So grateful. My coaching style is to really focus on your relationship with money. I love to start with how you currently feel about money and focus on what you want to change and how to do that. If we can change our behaviours then the numbers will change with it. I love getting specific with my clients on goals THEY want to achieve and what feels good to them. It starts with the foundation on how you feel and what you want to change. Running numbers can be overwhelming but it gets ALOT easier when you know why you want to pay attention to your money. I am living proof that you can turn your story around. I never thought I would feel financially free. I never thought it was possible. It is. You're worth it.  Linda xo" JANUARY 5, 2021 WORKSHOP WITH MONEY COACH LINDA PARMAR https://www.lindaparmar.com/newmoney https://www.instagram.com/lindaparmarcoach/ https://www.facebook.com/lindaparmarcoaching/ Your Money, Your Recovery Podcast:  Podcast (lindaparmar.com)    FOR ALL THINGS THE RECOVERY HOUR: therecoveryhour.com loriwindfeldt.com IG: @the.recovery.hour.podcast FB: @therecoveryhourpodcast

This week the best recovery podcast co-host in the business, Jason has an outstanding interview with veritable Recovery Powerhouse Sherry Gaba. Sherry Gaba is a licensed clinical social worker, Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Certified Recovery Coach specializing in individual, couples, family, and group psychotherapy as well as the editor of Recovery Today Magazine. Sherry was the go-to expert for Dr. Drew Pinsky's Celebrity Rehab show on VH1 and later on the spin-off, VH1's Sober House as well as Celebrity Rehab's Sex Addiction. As you'll soon discover, Sherry frames addiction and codependency as two sides from the same coin, indeed codependency has a lot more in common with addiction than we might think. We get to know Sherry, learn a lot from her about her life's work, addiction, and codependency, as well as how we can identify and overcome it so #Listenup Sherry's books FREE E-BOOK! "The truth about codependency" plus quiz https://wakeuprecovery.com/codependency-quiz/ The Law of Sobriety: Attracting positive energy for a powerful recovery- by Sherry Gaba https://www.amazon.com/Law-Sobriety-Attracting-Positive-Powerful/dp/0757315151/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&hvadid=78202831730487&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&keywords=sherry+gaba&qid=1604780709&sr=8-3&tag=mh0b-20 Love Smacked:How to stop the cycle of relationship addiction and codependency to find everlasting love.- by Sherry Gaba https://www.amazon.com/Love-Smacked-Relationship-Codependency-Everlasting/dp/1628657405/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&hvadid=78202831730487&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&keywords=sherry+gaba&qid=1604780774&sr=8-1&tag=mh0b-20 To join the tribe at Wake Up Recovery for Codependents go to https://wakeuprecovery.com/ Copyright: (c) 2015-2021 The Way Out Podcast | All Rights Reserved Theme Music: “all clear” (https://ketsa.uk/browse-music/) by Ketsa (https://ketsa.uk) licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0(https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/). --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/the-way-out-podcast/message

We sit down with Cindi Roberts (Sober Sexpert, Certified Recovery Coach, Sexual Health & Wellness Educator, Speaker Trainer, Former Sexuality Education Expert at Pure Romance & Slumber Parties) and discuss her journey in terms of both career and recovery. An honest and insightful conversation about social messages around sex and shame, and what changes when we get sober.

Addiction is a life-long battle that is 100% treatable. "My own sobriety delivered hope and opportunities to live a life that adds joy and purpose," said Tim Roberto talking with Aimee Cabo in this episode of The Cure Radio Show. The Cure Radio™ live talk radio show and live-streamed podcast is hosted by Aimee Cabo and offers a platform of hope to anyone who has experienced or is currently experiencing domestic violence, abuse, trauma, mental health, or other challenges that affect your life. It's a place to find comfort, knowledge, strategies, answers, hope, and love, and so much more, all while you are healing your wounds and knowing that you are loved and not alone. Join Aimee and her professional guests live on The Cure with Aimee Cabo Video Podcast  every Saturday at 1 PM EST recorded during the live radio show. Please listen and subscribe to the show and then share the show with others. Enjoy weekly contests, knowledgeable guests, and a few laughs. It's then available after as an Audio Podcast available heard on most podcast platforms. You can find information about the show and past guests bios by visiting the RADIO SHOW PAGE. Aimee hopes that anyone who has suffered abuse of any kind, or walked a moment in similar shoes, will find inspiration in these pages, and hope that love and truth will ultimately prevail. Please subscribe and share this podcast. HOSTS: Aimee Cabo Nikolov is a Cuban American who has lived most of her life in Miami. After many years of healing, finding love, raising a family and evolving her relationship with God, Aimee's true grit and courage led her to pen an honest, thought-provoking memoir. Years of abuse became overshadowed with years of happiness and unconditional love. Now Aimee is the president of IMIC Research, a medical research company, a speaker, radio host and focused on helping others. You can read more about Aimee by visiting her website. Dr. Boris Nikolov is the CEO of Neuroscience Clinic. You can read more about Dr. Nikolov and the work he is doing by visiting his website. GUESTS: Tim Roberto is a passionate Certified Addiction Counselor and Certified Recovery Coach who has been in the mental health field since 2007. Experiencing his own addiction and recovery keeps him mindful of how precious sobriety is. Tim’s experience and work as a recovery professional confirm that change is possible for ALL who are willing to try. His approach to recovery coaching and companionship honors the individualized roads to recovery and success. He empowers each client to discover and practice modalities, tools, and techniques that work best for them. Witnessing the transformation that his clients experience and knowing in his heart that addiction is 100% treatable inspires Tim to show up for others every day even in the most difficult of situations. Tim currently resides in Palm Beach County, Florida, where he enjoys the outdoors and daily exercising. You can read more about Tim's work at Genesis House by visiting his website.

How much do you rely on alcohol to relax you, help you celebrate, stimulate you? More women today are drinking more alcohol. Why and what can we do to focus more on ourselves? Join us for a discussion with Meg Lewis, http://www.meglewiscoaching.com/ who is a certified recovery coach working with professional women with mild to moderate alcohol use disorders. Meg says “life has really become just an accessory to drinking.” She talks about how she overcame her own dependance on alcohol and says there is hope for others like her.

Sherry Gaba, LCSW  is a Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Certified Recovery Coach specializing in individual, couples, family, and group psychotherapy and maintains a private practice in Westlake Village, CA, as well as providing phone and skype appointments. With over twenty years of experience as a clinician, and a graduate of USC specializing in addictions, relationships, co-dependency, trauma, parenting, divorce and single parenting, she is currently serving as a private practitioner working with a broad spectrum of clients. In addition, she is a consultant for several high profile Malibu Rehab Centers and has worked with numerous celebrities in her career.  Her psychotherapy and life coaching go much deeper than traditional therapy and coaching. Sherry has the unique ability to un-cover intuitive insights from her clients’ deepest selves allowing them to manifest their greatest dreams and desires. In addition, Sherry is an often requested speaker in person and on global internet teleseminars and has presented at National conferences and to general audiences on numerous topics. She is the host of the Recovery Today Summit and co-host on the KVTA AM radio show, The Brighter Side of Recovery: Families and Couples in Crises. Sherry was the go-to expert for Dr. Drew Pinsky’s Celebrity Rehab show on VH1 and later on the spin-off, VH1’s Sober House as well as Celebrity Rehab’s Sex Addiction. (sherrygaba.com) sherrygaba.com wakeuprecovery.com BONUS:  addictionunlimited.com/recoveryrecipe Facebook:  facebook.com/groups/addictionunlimited Insta:  @addictionunlimited Books: The Law of Sobriety The Marriage and Relationship Junkie  

As a Certified Recovery Coach, Anthony Jackson works diligently to help those suffering with any type of Addiction break free. In his published book, Prison Sentence to Purpose Driven, Anthony has boldly laid out his life’s journey with total transparency. Detailing how wrong choices led him into a life filled with darkness; holding nothing but danger, heartache, disappointment and destruction. Having overcome his own personal battle with drug addiction, Anthony understands the viciousness of addiction and the vital need for tools, support and accountability to victoriously defeat such a struggle. Thus, fueling his fire to become a recovery coach. Anthony is driven by the mindset that, we are all given the opportunity to reroute our pathway’s direction to lead us into pure light; filled with God’s forgiveness, peace, joy and lifelong success. Anthony is currently a great asset to society. He is a husband, father of three daughters; with three grandsons and one lone little granddaughter. He was able to re-establish himself in the workforce. Efforts that led him to being a Recovery Coach; as well ownership of his own business as an owner/operator truck driver currently stationed in Indiana. He also served on the panel for events with The Ross Movement. Aiding in assistance for those of need in the Indianapolis area. Anthony’s passion is pure and because of his humble spirit and loving heart, Anthony has received immeasurable support from his family and friends. Connect with Tony at: www.tonyrestored.com

Episode 61  How to Create a Life You Don't Want to Escape From with Natalie Fairbrook Natalie Fairbrook is a Certified Recovery Coach, Certified Life Coach, and Accountability Coach for Hip Sobriety.  Natalie is a Yoga Teacher who removed alcohol from her life in 2015.  Through her own recovery and much in-depth self-examination and internal work and training, her passion for being of service led her to this beautiful work with others seeking to grow their lives and move away from a life that is dulled by addiction.  Natalie shares her love of yoga, meditation, and essential oils and how all of these things and more help her to create a life that she no longer wants to escape from.  Topics discussed:  Natalie's sobriety and what she did two days after she quit drinking Tips to build a daily meditation practice  The importance of a morning routine  Managing a busy schedule  Essential oils and how to use them in your life  Cultivating self-love and kindness To find Natalie:  Website  Instagram Resources discussed:  Journey to The Heart, Melody Beattie Meditations From The Mat, by Rolf Gates The Wild Unknown Tarot Cards The Mantra Project - Hip Sobriety Satcha Malas To find Lori:  Website Instagram To 50 & Beyond Facebook Community    Order Elevate Your Life: Your Road Map To Discover Who You Are Today and What You Want in (mid) Life        

Nothing better than an expert opening up about how they too are human and can find themselves in struggle, just like the rest of us. Listen to this episode as Sherry Gaba - seen on Dr. Drew's Celebrity Rehab; LCSW, Certified Recovery Coach and author of "The Law of Sobriety: Attracting Positive Energy for a Powerful Recovery" and "The Marriage and Relationship Junkie: Kicking your Obsession" tells how our earliest moments of life can perpetuate a rhythm in relationships. Sherry tells of the insidiousness of addiction in a relationship that can make even the experts go to great lengths and repeat destructive patterns (sometimes for years) trying to fix what's broken.

Have you ever felt compelled to jump into a new relationship a little too quickly? Is it possible that you’re actually addicted to love and relationships? How would you know? This week, our guest is Sherry Gaba, best-selling author of The Marriage and Relationship Junkie and The Law of Sobriety: Attracting Positive Energy for a Powerful Recovery. Sherry is a Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Certified Recovery Coach specializing in individual, couples, family, and group psychotherapy - and she is also the editor of Recovery Today magazine. In this episode, you’ll learn what it means to be addicted to love and relationships and where it comes from. We’ll also dive into how you can tell if you’re addicted to love and relationships and what you can do to start on your path toward healthier relationships and connection. As always, I’m looking forward to your thoughts on this episode and what revelations and questions it creates for you. Please join us in the Relationship Alive Community on Facebook to chat about it! Sponsors: Along with our amazing listener supporters (you know who you are - thank you!), this week's episode is being sponsored by two amazing companies with special offers for you. First are the folks at TakeCareOf.com. Through a unique online quiz, they help you figure out exactly what vitamins and herbal supplements you need to achieve your optimal health. They use high-quality ingredients and can save you as much as 20% over comparable store-bought brands. On top of all that, they are offering you 25% OFF your first month if you visit takecareof.com and use the coupon code “ALIVE” at checkout. RxBar.com makes a whole food protein bar that’s super-tasty – Chloe and I almost always have these with us to help us stay nourished on the go. They’re healthy, easy to digest, and have simple ingredients with no added sugar – plus they’re gluten/dairy/soy-free. You can get 25% OFF your first order by visiting RxBar.com/alive and using the coupon code “ALIVE” at checkout. Valid in the US only.   Resources: Visit the website for Sherry Gaba’s book, The Marriage and Relationship Junkie, to learn more about how to break the cycle of marriage and relationship addiction and live fabulously on your own or with a partner. Visit Sherry Gaba’s main website FREE Relationship Communication Secrets Guide - perfect help for handling conflict and shifting the codependent patterns in your relationship Guide to Understanding Your Needs (and Your Partner's Needs) in Your Relationship (ALSO FREE) www.neilsattin.com/gaba Visit to download the transcript, or text “PASSION” to 33444 and follow the instructions to download the transcript to this episode with Sherry Gaba. Amazing intro/outro music graciously provided courtesy of: The Railsplitters - Check them Out   Transcript: Neil Sattin: Hello, and welcome to another episode of Relationship Alive. This is your host, Neil Sattin. We're here to talk about relationships and yet what brings us into a relationship? Why are we there in the first place? So many of us enter relationships for awesome reasons, sometimes it's less than awesome reasons, and sometimes it's a combination of the two. You feel some magnetic spark with a person, but at the same time, maybe they support you in ways that aren't necessarily healthy for you, or you get trapped in some dynamic that doesn't really make for the best relationship possible. And then you might feel like, "Oh, okay, this relationship ended," and you're ready to go into another relationship, maybe even a little too quickly. And it wouldn't be that uncommon for you to wonder, "Is there something about this? Am I actually addicted to being in relationships? Am I addicted to love? Is there something... What is it that's compelling me to do this?" And I think it's interesting to tease apart what it is that might compel us in an unhealthy way, to enter into a relationship with others, and what's healthy about it? 'Cause when we're talking about addiction, there are positive addictions, as well as negative addictions. So how do you find the balance, and how do you figure out you where you land in terms of your approach to the relationship? Neil Sattin: So we're going to tackle this question about whether or not you might possibly be addicted to love and relationship, how to know and what to do about it. And in order to have that conversation, I have with me today, yet another esteemed guest, her name is Sherry Gaba, and she's a therapist who is also the author of "The Marriage and Relationship Junkie." A book that is available on Amazon, and talks all about this question of how do you find your own path to health in terms of how you relate to others? And of course, that's a conversation we're having all the time here on Relationship Alive because hey, I'm just... I recognize that just like you, there's work to be done. And so, we're going to dive deep into this question around addiction and obsession around love and see if we can come out the other side with some answers. As always, we will have a detailed transcript of today's episode and to download that, all you have to do is visit neilsattin.com/gaba, and you spell that, G-A-B-A, as in Sherry Gaba, our guest for today. Or you can always text the word, "passion" to the number 33444, follow the instructions and I will send you a link where you can download the transcript for this episode. Alright, I think that's all I have to cover today at this moment. Let's dive in. Sherry Gaba, so great to have you here with us on Relationship Alive. Sherry Gaba: What a fantastic introduction, thank you, Neil, that was amazing, and I love what you're doing in the world and loving just getting to know you, I love your energy and I'm just grateful to have this platform today to talk about this really important subject. Neil Sattin: Great, well we're off to a good start then. Sherry Gaba: Yeah. Neil Sattin: So it is a complicated question whether we're drawn into relating with another person for the right reasons or the wrong reasons. Maybe you can help us start to tease that apart, how do we know if the reason that we're seeking out someone else is something that ultimately is going to support our health and growth, and thriving in the world? Sherry Gaba: Well, let's look at addiction in general, if you look at the broader sense of addiction, and love addiction and relationship romance addiction is our subject today. If you look at the broader definition of addiction is when your life is out of control and it's becoming unmanageable and underneath that, you're making choices based on emptiness a feeling of lack, a feeling of not wanting to be alone, that would be a love addiction, feeling like the world is just a really scary place almost terror that, "If I'm not in a relationship, if I'm not connected or hooked up to somebody, then I'm going to "dies," literally. And so, love addiction is really under the umbrella of addiction. Sherry Gaba: It's a process addiction, it's a lifestyle addiction, so think about binge eating, or sex addiction, or being addicted to exercise or internet addiction or gaming, or shopping or spending, those are all lifestyle addictions. So, you're becoming addicted to a mood-altering activity, in other words, your brain really lights up when you're hooking up with whatever it is that you're needing to hook up with, whether it's the food or the love, or the sex or whatever your addiction is. So the relationship for a love addict is the only person's identity. And then if a breakup occurs, the addictive lover is longing for the attachment and the pleasurable feelings of that lost relationship. So just like the drug addict may be withdrawing from his or her drug needing that "fix," the love addict is needing that fix of attachment. Sherry Gaba: And underneath all of us, all of us as human beings we all want to attach, we all want to bond, we all want to connect. But when it becomes unhealthy, and we start making really bad choices around that, then we're stepping into love addiction. For instance, you step into a relationship 'cause you're afraid of being alone like I mentioned earlier, or you're afraid of the unknown, or you get into a relationship where you're trying to change them or fix them and not accepting them for who they are. Needing someone to make you feel whole, because like I mentioned earlier, you feel empty if you're not in a relationship. Looking for others for affirmation and self-worth and for validation rather than already having that within yourself. Being terrorized of abandonment, having those withdrawal symptoms that I mentioned earlier that if a relationship ends, you are in complete withdrawal. And then really giving up who we are out of the fear that we might lose someone or someone may not approve of us. So, if any of those things sound familiar, you may be dealing with love addiction. Neil Sattin: Yeah, and I'm reminded of when Helen Fisher was on the show, she has this viewpoint that in some respects, all love is addiction and that's why when we break up, we go through symptoms and pain that's very similar to what any addict would go through when they are in withdrawal from their partner. But I like the distinction that you're making around how... And this is I think, why love can be a positive or a negative addiction, because you could be addicted to love with someone who's really good for you, and where you actually really support each other and there's a lot that's beneficial going on, or you can be addicted to love with someone where you're just fueling the dopamine rush. Sherry Gaba: Yeah. Neil Sattin: And I think that is... Go ahead. Sherry Gaba: Well, if you're feeling the dopamine rush, it probably isn't you're addicted to a healthy relationship. Because yes, in the beginning, there's that fantasy, there's that attachment, there's that goo-goo ga-ga feeling. Sure, that can happen, but healthy relationships really move into a more mature growing state of being. I'm not saying you can't have that goo-goo ga-ga come up at times, but I think if you're constantly in that state, I think then it becomes more obsessive and then it becomes more unhealthy. I can't speak to all relationships, but I think healthier relationships change, they morph into other things, they morph into healthier love, they morph into other things like respect and nurturing, and it isn't just fueled by that, "Oh my god," goo-goo ga-ga feeling, you know what I'm saying? Neil Sattin: Yeah, if we look at the addiction cycle, and we had Alex Katehakis on the show to talk a little bit also about sex addiction. That what we're really doing, the reason we show up predictive behaviors, and you mentioned this a moment ago, is to help us with our own feelings of dysregulation and discomfort, we turn to the thing that gives us that pleasurable sensation for comfort. And I think you're right, all relationships are going to do that at first to some extent. And as I was preparing for our conversations today, it just occurred to me like, Oh, right, so if you're in a relationship, like most relationships where after a certain period of time, the dopamine energy starts to fade a little bit, and you haven't necessarily figured out how to build health into your relationship, and those healthy bonding behaviors foster lots of oxytocin which is another, a pair bonding hormone, then you're going to be missing the effects of the dopamine, not because there's something wrong with your partnership necessarily, but because you tune back into what's wrong with you, and those feelings of discomfort. And so then you have to chase the dopamine whether it's escalating the drama or ditching someone for someone new so that you can get that because you're not equipped at that moment to actually deal with your own dysregulation and discomfort. Sherry Gaba: Right. Well, you're addicted to the high, so to speak. You're addicted to the romance, you're addicted to the newness factor. I am a love addict, the best time for me is that first falling in love, that's the part where I'm just... That's where I'm most comfortable, that's my go-to. The problem with that is, you're picking from a place of need versus a place of healthful being. In other words, you're picking from a place of emptiness, you're picking a place of, "This person's going to fill up this need that I have, that I don't feel whole already, that I need somebody else to fill me up to feel good about myself." And hopefully, we can lead into a conversation about early trauma because that is a huge piece to this subject. Sherry Gaba: And often I'll share my own story because I think people underestimate what early trauma does and why that is a huge piece in the love addict behavior or the need for that high, that initial high. We're always chasing that early high, we often say with addicts, they're chasing that first high, that first crack experience or that first alcoholic experience, whatever, heroin experience. Well, the love addict is chasing that first high of falling in love, that's where everything... That is it, this is utopia, this is where it all is, and unfortunately, it isn't sustaining and when it does change, hopefully, it'll change into something healthy, but for the love addict, it generally does not turn into that something healthy. And usually, what they... The love addict picks people that aren't healthy for them. That's another piece to this, is that love addicts tend to be attracted to love avoidance, they're attracted to people that are unavailable, they might be attracted to people that are abusive and they don't care because they want that high no matter what, and they're picking what they know rather than what's good for them. Neil Sattin: Right. Right, so if you're in a relationship, what are some of the signs that you might see happening in your relationship if you've veered into addictive territory? Sherry Gaba: Well, I think if you're putting up with abuse, of course, you may be with a narcissist. I think we talked about this a little bit earlier, but over-adapting to what others want, losing yourself in the process, having no boundaries, always saying yes when really, “no” is not even in your vocabulary. This terror, this fear of letting go, fear of the unknown, so you stay because it's better than what might be out there. At least you know what you're getting here, even if it's unhealthy. You're always trying to fix and change your partner. That person is what makes you feel whole and complete, you're absolutely empty, you're in the ethers of emptiness without that person or in relationship, and then that person is all that you are in terms of, you're seeking their affirmation, their validation, their acknowledgment, all your self-worth is based on being with that person. You're petrified of abandonment. You might have some of those withdrawal symptoms when they're not around, you only are comfortable when they're in your space, but if they're off to work or off with other... Doing other things, you feel completely lost, and you give up who you are out of fear that they may not want you. You give up who you are, you lose parts of yourself to be with this person. Neil Sattin: Got it. So I'm feeling a pretty... I'm doing the diagnosis here on myself even and thinking about how even relationships in the past that have started out healthy, they can veer into this territory if you're not careful. Sherry Gaba: Sure. And then we're talking maybe more about a codependent relationship. And I hate throwing out words like codependent or even a love addiction word, because people... It becomes very cliche, because what you said earlier in the call, and I really picked up on that was that some of these things you have with your relationship but they're healthy. And in other words, you love that person, you respect that person, and sure, that person on some level maybe completes you on some level. But the question is if that relationship wasn't there would you be okay? Sure, you might be sad and you would grieve, and you would miss that person terribly, but would you be completely lost? I think of my own mother, my father passed away and they had a 60-year romance. And when my father died, and again, this is part of grief as well, but it was a little more pathological than that. My mother picked up the first man that looked at her. And he's a very bad man. She picked somebody that really is a predator per se, and he knew exactly what he was doing. And she's in a relationship with... In a very unhealthy relationship with someone that's completely taking advantage of her, because she is petrified of being without somebody. She just can't even function. And so that's when we're really getting into territory that's dangerous. Neil Sattin: Yeah. Sherry Gaba: Because you're actually being taken advantage of. And that's a whole other conversation, there is a whole world out there, there's... Just in LA alone, there are probably 10,000 predators out there picking women that just will believe anything that they hear, just so they can couple up and partner up and bond with somebody. Neil Sattin: Let's... Sherry Gaba: I use that example because you never know, you could have a listener right now, a call that's in a situation like that. Neil Sattin: Yeah, yeah, I'm glad that you brought it up. And yeah, what it makes me curious about, I picked up on the sense of not being okay if you were to be alone. And because I think that it's so important to have that sense of okay-ness, that brings with it so much freedom to really see your relationship clearly, to see your part in the relationship clearly. So if we were to take a listener on a step or two down the road, toward... Like, if they're looking at themselves right now and saying, "Wow, yeah, I'm not sure I would be okay if this fell apart." There may be some practical considerations to that, maybe their livelihood is dependent on their partner or something like that. But I think you're talking about, even more, the existential sense of like, "No, my life might fall apart if I weren't with this person or... " How does someone go about starting to restore that sense of inner safety, so that they can bring that to the relationship? Sherry Gaba: Well, maybe that... This is a good time to talk about early trauma because if we grew up in a situation where our parents were really unavailable, maybe they were addicts, alcoholics themselves, maybe there was a divorce, maybe were raised by a single parent and they were busy working and you felt invisible because your needs weren't being met, maybe you were in a situation where you were almost parenting your parent. Maybe you were abandoned by a parent. There's this panic that sets in. And then what happens is, you're looking for anything outside yourself to fill up that pain and that panic, and you'll cling to anything and anyone. You're craving for something else to make you feel whole. So the question is, if you're already in a relationship, what draws you to this person? Is it because this person adds to your life? You feel like it brings joy to the joy that you already are as a person? Did you already feel whole as a person? Were you ever successfully single and just loving life as a single person? Or your whole basis was, "I need to attach to someone because without attaching to someone, I am lost. I'm like that child that didn't have a parent that was available to me." Sherry Gaba: Do you feel like you're not enough without that relationship? Do you feel enough anyway? Yeah, do you feel good enough even without a relationship? Are you unconsciously attempting to satisfy that developmental hungry, so that hungry ghost that people talk about, Buddhists talk about, are you trying to satisfy that? Or does that person, again, add to your sense of being, and sense of self, or are they just completing what you are not? Sherry Gaba: And are you always looking outside yourself to fix yourself, your fear, your pain, your discomfort? Or do you have that safety within yourself to... That's a great word, are you able to self-regulate yourself? Are you able to be alone at any time? I don't know if that answers your question, Neil, I think it's so great that we're diving into the fact that if you're already in a relationship, do you have these things? And I don't want people to freak out and think, "Oh my God, I'm a love addict, and I'm in a relationship, I better get out because I gotta find myself." No, no, no, no, it's not about that. But I think there are ways to start creating... And see, do you have early trauma? Were you abandoned? And then if you were, how to start healing from that. For me, my trauma was so early, it's unbelievable, I was in an incubator for two and a half months. So I started out in the world unregulated. I started out not having that early bonding with my mother, she didn't hold me for two and a half months, and then even when I came home, she went to work right away, so she was unavailable. And I didn't get what I needed, and so I was always looking for something outside of me to fill me up. I was always looking for that "breast," so to speak. Sherry Gaba: That's kind of a metaphor, but it's... I was always looking for something else to completely... 'Cause I felt complete, I didn't get that mirroring, I didn't get that bonding, I didn't get that security, that safety. So those are some things to think about, what was your early childhood like? Did you go through any of the things that I mentioned earlier? And if you did, how do you work on those issues? For me, I got into therapy with someone that does what's called somatic experiencing, and now, I'm a practitioner of that, and it's getting back into your body and being able to be okay within yourself, instead of always running away from yourself. Always thinking something else can complete you when everything you have is right there within you. Neil Sattin: Great, and yes, we've had Peter Levine on the show actually, to talk about somatic experiencing. Sherry Gaba: Oh fast, you've had some amazing guest. Neil Sattin: Fortunately yeah, I'm so happy that he was willing to chat and I do believe that that, in particular, is such a powerful modality for healing early traumas. And what I love about it because it's based on your sensation, you don't necessarily have to know what it was. It goes by this theory that the trauma is just stored in there and so you're giving your body a chance to process things that are stuck, that it should have processed through whenever the trauma, and it could be a "big-T" trauma or "little-T" trauma, whenever that occurred. So there's nothing abnormal about you or anyone with having something that might be stuck within you that just needs to be healed. Sherry Gaba: I love that. I want people to know that there is nothing wrong with you. There might have been something that happened to you as you said, a big trauma, or little trauma, and let's discharge that energy that's been built up so that we can get unblocked so that we can bring in health and wholeness. So that you can feel complete just within yourself, so you don't have to seek outside yourself to feel good. The truth of the matter is just being on this call right now, is the first step because people are going to become aware like, "Oh, this is interesting, let's get curious about this." And then from there, make a decision to change, learning to stop looking for external solutions for problems that can be solved within. Sherry Gaba: Really explore their personal fears, and really get out of the denial, that's a huge piece with addiction. Addiction is the only disease that says, "I don't have a problem." So really, open yourself up to, "Yeah, there might be something here." And really examine those early suppressed traumas that might have occurred early on in life that we just talked about. Maybe go ahead and listen to your Peter Levine interview, so you can understand trauma a little bit better. Start self-parenting yourself. Really look... I sometimes suggest to people, "Find a photo of you when you were a child and stick that photo right next to your bed, and just start loving that inner child that maybe didn't get what they needed." Become really a loving, forgiving and compassionate person to yourself. Sherry Gaba: You didn't just wake up one day and go, "Oh, I want to be a love addict. I want to feel pain all the time. I want to feel like I have to be... " You have to completely or I feel like nothing. No, that isn't what you... You didn't cause anything, it's just from your experiences in your history, this is what happened, that energy never got completed, as you said. And just use the pain to grow and prepare for a healthy relationship or the relationship that you're already in, and just really begin to trust in yourself and to let go of what no longer is serving you and find a really great therapist, find a really great coach but somebody that really understands perhaps, trauma work. I don't know if coaches really do trauma work, some may, but you want to make sure they understand the trauma piece. Maybe, find a sex and love addicts anonymous meeting. There's so much support out there to begin working on these issues. Neil Sattin: Right. And in your book, "The Marriage and Relationship Junkie" you do offer some great tools for people who are looking to rebuild, and you don't have to be alone in order to go through them. So I'm glad that you qualified that earlier on, where you said, "If you're in a relationship, you don't have to panic and abandon just to find yourself." Sherry Gaba: Right. Neil Sattin: Yeah. Sherry Gaba: Exactly. And you know what you said too earlier, it's such a great feeling, and I think you said it, I think you used the word, extreme. I divorced my... I've had multiple marriages, multi-relationships, I divorced my ex-husband, he was an alcoholic and he couldn't get sober, and I really gave it my best. And I was lost when that relationship ended because it was a very codependent, obsessive relationship, but once I healed and I started doing things for myself, I joined a great 12-Step Program, I took up canoeing. I started really finding myself, I was able to then hopefully pick somebody else that was much better for me because I knew that no matter what, I could be on my own. And I have to be honest, I never felt that way before. I had never been able to really be alone successfully and be happy, and I truly was happy and single. And that brings me to another topic which would be as changing your verbiage around it, instead of saying to yourself, "Oh, I can't be alone. Oh my God, I can't be alone." It's like, "I can be single." Doesn't that sound a lot better? "I can be single" rather than, "I can't be alone"? Neil Sattin: Yeah, so much better and it just makes me think of how very few of us truly are alone, ever. I suppose that is true for some people but if you're listening to this podcast, you're here with me, at this moment. And odds are that there are other people in your life who care about you and who want to support you, and not see you in pain and not see you suffering. Sherry Gaba: Right, exactly. We all want to bond, we all want to connect. The opposite of addiction is connection, but the point of this call is really healthy connection. That's the point of your podcast, healthy relationships. And so that's... But it's not about stigmatizing you if you are in a codependent relationship. How great that you're on this call and now you can start changing things up a little bit and loosen up that codependent relationship, find other things in your life that help you feel good about yourself. And if you have that trauma, really start working on that trauma 'cause that's really where it all begins. I do some coaching, I'm a psychotherapist, but I can't tell you how many times I'll have a coaching client and they're just stuck. And that stuck-ness... They paid for every class, they listened to all of the podcasts, they bought all the books, but there's something inside of them that's stuck. And so to me, it really begins with moving that trauma out of your body, so that you can have a purposeful life and a meaningful relationship. Neil Sattin: Yeah. So a couple of things, first, let's just regroup, and I want to mention to you listening, I've mentioned a couple of other episodes, if you want to check out the Peter Levine episode, he's been on a couple times, but you definitely want to hear episode 29, which was the first one that he was on, to talk specifically about trauma and healing trauma. The other episode he was on, he was talking more about building resilience which is also important, but not as relevant to what we're talking about here. Also, the episode with Alex Katehakis, talking about addiction and what's involved in our neurobiology of addiction and how to heal that. That is episode 116. So I just wanted you to have those so you can listen to them later. And Sherry, I'm really curious because so many of the tools that you offer in "The Marriage and Relationship Junkie" are very practical, and I hear you as a strong voice of support for someone getting help, and I'm always talking about that here on the show. That there are some things where it's just easier if you're not trying to do it by yourself or trying to wing it, or reading a book and trying to put it into practice. That being said, I would love to offer our listeners something really powerful here that they could do or they could try on their own, that would give them a taste of the kind of healing that we're talking about, a taste of the personal empowerment and freedom that we're talking about. Neil Sattin: And so I'm wondering if just speaking those words, if there's anything that comes to mind for you that we could offer our listeners as a way to get started, to jump-start the process, whether they're single or in relationship or if you have a different idea for both, then that's good too 'cause there are plenty of single people who are also listening to the show. I hear from you, but all the time to learn so that when you're in your next relationship, you're prepared, and I so appreciate that. I wish I had had a show like this, honestly to listen to way back when... Sherry Gaba: Well, I think in the beginning, is just to see if you have this issue, is to maybe take my quiz, if you go to sherrygaba.com, I have a love addiction quiz. And that's just a first step in seeing if you are a love addict. I also have a quiz at sherrygaba.com on whether or not you're codependent. Because you can be codependent and not be a love addict. A codependent may be someone who's always trying to fix, control everything outside themselves, addicted to controlling people, places, and things. But a love addict is a little bit more specific, and that is that you are addicted to love, relationship, romance and feel empty if you're not in a relationship or with somebody. So that's a great place to start, is to take those quizzes, and see if it applies. I have some free ebooks that go along with those quizzes. My book is almost like a workbook, every chapter has questions for you to answer, to journal on. It's really... It's years and years of personal and professional experience in a book. Neil Sattin: Yeah, I found that it was really a great synthesis of lots of different modalities, and you talk about inner child work which you mentioned a few moments ago, you talk about healing trauma, you talk about taking proactive steps in your own life so that you're building your own strength and presence in the world. Sherry Gaba: And even talking about the law of attraction, on how to attract somebody in a healthy way. Because energetically, we attract what we are. I'm sure you've had conversations with people related to positive psychology or law of attraction, and the truth of the matter is energetically, we're going to attract exactly where we are in our life. When you're in a healthy place, you're going to attract healthy, when you're not, you're going to attract not healthy. Neil Sattin: Right. I would love it, and I'm putting you on the spot here, so I'm admitting, freely admitting that there's maybe a little bit of pressure here, but I'm curious, yeah, if I've listened to this conversation and thought, "Yep, that's me. Like I don't need to take the quiz, I know it's me, and oh my God, with what Sherry just said about attracting what is within, is what we attract without, now I'm really screwed." What can we do to help someone experience a shift even around that? How do you experience that shift in who you are, let's say... What's coming to me is like who you are energetically and what you want to be in the world, in such a way that you can feel what it's like to see the world with different glasses on? Sherry Gaba: That's a very broad question. I don't even know how to answer that because I think it's a process, I don't think there's an instant fix. Neil Sattin: Yeah, of course not. Sherry Gaba: I think the only thing I can say is the fact that they're on this call and they're hearing things that feel like that could be me when they're actually moving out of denial and that's the first step. I suppose, what I would say is, the first step is waking up to the truth. Waking up to the truth and "Oh my God, this... I realize that I am not complete unless I'm coupled up." And just knowing that is the first step. And then the next step is to... As you said, you can read a book that doesn't always do the magic. I'd love for people to pick up my book and dive deeper into even my story to see if they can relate and all the exercises. But hiring somebody like yourself who does relationship coaching or maybe working with someone like me who dives more into love addiction piece, I'm not sure exactly what you're asking. You definitely put me on the spot. Neil Sattin: Okay. Well, I feel like this will take form, this will take shape, so I'm not worried. Sherry Gaba: Yeah, one thing I could do with everybody right now, which might be a way to metaphorically move to the other side in the moment, is I can do some positive affirmations right now on the call. And then, we know that positive affirmations change the wiring within your brain, and if you keep doing it it's going to keep changing the wiring in your brain of how you see things from negative to positive. So I'm going to say some affirmations maybe Neil you can repeat after me and everybody listening, and this might answer your question of, what would that feel like if we were in the middle of that transition from emptiness to wholeness? Does that... What do you think? Okay. Okay. So repeat after me, I'm a lovable and valuable person. Neil Sattin: I am a lovable and valuable person. Sherry Gaba: I am deserving of a healthy partner. Neil Sattin: I am deserving of a healthy partner. Sherry Gaba: Who is capable of loving, respecting and honoring me as a person. Neil Sattin: A healthy partner who is capable of loving, honoring and respecting me as a person. Sherry Gaba: Withdrawal will not last forever. Neil Sattin: Withdrawal will not last forever. Sherry Gaba: My needs and wants are important. Neil Sattin: My needs and wants are important. Sherry Gaba: All my experiences contribute to my growth. Neil Sattin: All my experiences contribute to my growth. Sherry Gaba: I am learning to let go of dependencies on others. Neil Sattin: I'm learning to let go of dependencies on others. Sherry Gaba: And relying on myself for happiness. Neil Sattin: And relying on myself for happiness. Sherry Gaba: I walk away from toxic people. Neil Sattin: I walk away from toxic People. Sherry Gaba: I create my own truth in love. Neil Sattin: I create my own truth in love. Sherry Gaba: And that's that. And so maybe there is a little energetic shift that people might be experiencing right now. Again, I'm not about instant fixes but this is a beginning point, this is a starting point, and that's really all we have is a starting point and then we transit, we grow from there. Neil Sattin: Yeah, one thing that I really love about that exercise and the practice of positive affirmation, yes, there's the way that it reinforces a different neuro pathway within us and a different energetic pathway in terms of what we project into the world around us. Sherry Gaba: Yes. Neil Sattin: On top of that, I feel like I got to recognize, "Oh these are the places where there's a little bit of dissonance within me, like when I say it, I can't say it with 100% conviction. And so if that's true, that I'm not able to say it with 100% conviction, then to me that indicates a place where there's some work to be done. Sherry Gaba: Yeah, that's so true, because for the law of attraction to work or to attract what it is that you desire, you have to be congruent with what you're saying and believing and what you're actually doing on the outside. So, that's exactly true. There is a dissonance, if you're feeling any kind of like, "Oh, that's not completely true," then there's a really good chance that how you're acting in the world, how you're behaving in the world or being in the world is not a match to how you really feel. You need to work on that a little bit because the congruency is what allows you to attract either the healthy relationship that you desire or the one that you're in. Neil Sattin: Right. This reminds me a little bit of what might be the next step in this process. It's not the next step necessarily, but a lot of times with my clients, there can be this moment where you realize like, "Oh." For instance let's say, this wasn't true for me in this moment, but it has been true in the past, where I might say, "Oh, I'm worthy of being loved and I'm lovable." And I think I've even shared with my audience in a past episode, a time when that actually didn't really feel true for me. And so when that's not entirely true for you, the choices that you make are totally different than if you are to... If you recognize, "Oh, there was a little bit of a hitch when I said that statement out loud," or it could have been one of the other things that Sherry just offered you, then you can ask yourself, "Well, if I did think that I was lovable and worthy of love, how does that act? How would I act in the world from that perspective?" You get to try on that lens... Sherry Gaba: Yeah. Neil Sattin: Once you've identified where it's missing, You can be like, "Well, if I were that what would the world look like?" Sherry Gaba: And even more important is to make friends with that intuition that you know to be true. In other words, don't run away from what you know to be true, because then you're stepping into that denial lens again, is where, "Oh, I feel this, and I know it's not right but I don't care, I'm just going to close my eyes." And my whole mission in life is to keep people awake to their truth. So not to be afraid of the truth, the truth doesn't mean you have to break up with your partner this minute, it doesn't mean that you have to spend the rest of your life soul searching, it doesn't mean that you have to go get a divorce, it doesn't mean that you have to get off that dating app, it just means you need to just become aware and to stay in truth. And as long as you do that, the transformation is possible. Neil Sattin: Yeah, I take a really strong stand for the process that we go through as individuals and the effect that that can have on our partnerships. So lest do you think that if you're in a dysfunctional relationship, the whole point of this show isn't that it's perfect, the point is, it probably isn't perfect. And so you get to take steps that help you transform you and thus transform the whole dynamic. Sherry Gaba: Yeah, and not be afraid, let go of that fear, just welcome up the chance to transform. Welcome up that the exactly that life is messy and as long as you stay away and you're willing to grow... We're all growing, we're all changing, we're all making better choices, hopefully, learning from our mistakes but it's not about beating ourselves up, it's about having the great compassion of humanity that we are, that we're just humans doing the best that we can. That was one of the points of writing the book, "The marriage and Relationship Junkie" was that I really wanted to eradicate the stigma around someone like myself who's been married multiple times, who's had multiple relationships instead of walking around thinking "I'm a failure," or those that read my book think that they're a failure because they just couldn't get it right, is to just have an understanding of where that began and how can I change that the trajectory of the future? Sherry Gaba: So that I, maybe, do things in a different way and make different choices, 'cause life is filled with choices. And to own up to those choices, not to beat yourself up because of those choices, because there was a reason you made those choices. My choices were already paved for me when I was born two and a half months early, there was nothing I was going to be able to do about that. I had separation anxiety, I had abandonment issues, and that was going to be... Those feelings were going to be based on the decisions that I made in relationships. Neil Sattin: Right, and they were nobody's fault. Sherry Gaba: Nobody's fault. So we're not victims, we're just people that come from different histories, different experiences, and there's a reason why we are. I did one podcast with a woman who's been married six times, she had no idea, she started hysterically crying on the call. She was the host, because she goes, "Oh my God, you have labeled what I've always known, but didn't know what to call it, that's me." And it's like, "Okay, that's me? Okay great. So let's get curious about that." Doesn't mean we have to divorce our sixth husband, it just means, "Am I in a healthy relationship? Did I make a good choice and what can I do to heal all of that that brought me here today?" Neil Sattin: Right. They say the sixth time is a charm for a reason, right? Sherry Gaba: I think it's the third one. [chuckle] Neil Sattin: I'm just kidding. Sherry Gaba: Oh, okay. [laughter] My attitude is, do until you do it right, I don't think I ever... I won't say never, I'm not really interested at this point in my life, getting married again, but I certainly... I'm enjoying a healthy relationship, and I think that anything's possible. Anything's possible. Neil Sattin: Yeah, so one important thing that I'd like to chat about before we go, because I think one of the hesitations that people have around labeling and use that word a moment ago, labeling themselves as an addict, is the stigma that comes with it, the sense of, "Oh, this is inescapable, if I admit that I'm an addict then... " You hear the talk about a cliche like, "Once an addict, always an addict." And I'm curious for you, what's the truth in that versus that there is a true path for healing and... 'Cause I like that sense that the truth will set you free. If you're willing to look at your patterns, then that gives you a whole lot of power to make different kinds of choices for yourself and to heal the dysfunctional ways that you're looking for connection and regulation in your life and create positive ways of doing that. Sherry Gaba: Well, I think if you are a love addict per se, let's say, I'm not going to address substance abuse 'cause that might be a different... That goes a different way. That's a whole other topic, but if you feel that you might be a love addict, and you feel like you've had early trauma, I highly, highly recommend getting the support you need around that finding a really great somatic experiencing practitioner, reading up on Peter Levine's work, maybe even getting EMDR, that's another modality. I think that really healing that early trauma is important because, without that, I don't think you can make choices that are going to be in your best interest 'cause you haven't healed what is already inside of you that needs to be discharged in order to bring positivity back into your life. That work was the greatest work that I ever did in my life, join a sex and love addicts anonymous meeting, do that work, so you can bring healthy love into your life. I can't emphasize that enough because once I did that work, my whole life changed. Am I still a love addict? I guess is what you're asking, yes, I have to always be mindful for the rest of my life about love addict codependent behaviors. If I start getting obsessive, if I start just focusing on the person I'm with, start giving up my friendships, there's a... Sherry Gaba: I have to be continually vigilant at those things. And what I'm here to say is, once you do that work of trauma and self-regulation, you're less apt to become codependent again or making someone else your whole life, because you don't need to do that anymore because everything that you know and feel is within you, you feel whole already, so there's no need to be attached to just that one person, but I still have to be vigilant about it. Does that make sense? Neil Sattin: Absolutely, and the question, it's kind of a rhetorical question that comes up, is like, "Why wouldn't you want to be vigilant about those things?" I would want to know, first thing, if I'm starting to sacrifice my friendships and disappear into my relationship, I would want to know that, at any point in time, addict or not. Sherry Gaba: A few are an example of raw and real. You actually have a boyfriend and he's going to be going away for a couple of weeks, and that early piece of trauma comes up and goes. "This feels a little bit scary," like, "Oh, am I being abandoned?" And then I just... But because I've done the work, I can sit with that and I can be with it, and notice it and feel it and discharge it instead of becoming needy and obsessive and go into fear, "He's going to leave me," all of those things that I would have done in the past. Instead, I can just be the curious observer of the feelings and the thoughts and I can let it go. And that's a real example. Neil Sattin: Yeah. Sherry Gaba: That I'm still that baby that was born two and a half months early, but I have tools and ways to deal with those feelings that might come up rather than act out on them. Neil Sattin: Yeah, yeah, that's great, that's great. And I'm reminded too that it clicked into place for me actually, when you were describing that, which is that I think probably, part of that, the dopamine rush that we were talking about earlier and that pleasure, it actually is creating the illusion of safety. And I think it's been theorized, maybe John Gorman was even talking about this, that if we didn't feel that temporary love blindness at the beginning, we might never get into a relationship anyway. You almost need that to jump-start you into connection. But that being said, there are so much healthier ways of developing safety, and you were just talking about that inner safety and then there are also, of course, the healthy ways of developing safety in your relationship so that when your partner goes away for two weeks, there's true safety there. So you can counterbalance your inner safety with, "And we've created a container that actually I can rely on and I trust." Sherry Gaba: Exactly, a container within and maybe a container in the relationship. But certainly, that container within is vital, or you're going to do behaviors that... You're going to start doing all those obsessive behaviors, those needy behaviors that are not going to help the relationship. Neil Sattin: Right, they're crucial, crucial stuff. Well, Sherry Gaba, thank you so much for being here with us today, what a far-ranging conversation we've had. And of course, I feel like we could talk longer, but I want to respect your time. Your book, "The Marriage and Relationship Junkie" is a great read full of very practical stuff for you if you're thinking that this is something you identify with on some level and there's a path towards recovery in the book, so I highly recommend that. Sherry, you mentioned your website sherrygaba.com, and it's S-H-E-R-R-Y. I guess we should clarify that. We'll have links to all of this in the transcript for the show, which as a reminder, you can get if you visit neilsattin.com/gaba, G-A-B-A, or text the word "passion" to the number 33444 and follow the instructions. Sherry, I really appreciate your time today. Sherry Gaba: Oh my God, I love... This is probably one of the best interviews I've had. You truly know your subject, and you've obviously done a lot of homework and work on yourself and your relationship and I'm really grateful for your platform and for giving me this opportunity today, thank you so, so much. Neil Sattin: You are so welcome.  

Ebony K. English - influencer, speaker, & author . Certified Recovery Coach and Founder of Saved, Sober & Sitting Pretty Ebony K. English - influencer, speaker, & author . Certified Recovery Coach and Founder of Saved, Sober & Sitting Pretty Ebony K. English - influencer, speaker, & author . Certified Recovery Coach and Founder of Saved, Sober & Sitting Pretty Ebony K. English - influencer, speaker, & author . Certified Recovery Coach and Founder of Saved, Sober & Sitting Pretty Ebony K. English - influencer, speaker, & author . Certified Recovery Coach and Founder of Saved, Sober & Sitting Pretty

Today our special guest is Paul Ybarra. Paul is a Certified Recovery Coach through the State of Texas. Through his ministry, called Set Free Life, Paul and his wife Hollie, help people break free from the bondage of their past, uncover their true identity in Christ and step boldly into their full potential. Through his energy and vision, Paul offers those struggling with addiction sincere compassion, mentorship, and companionship as they “walk out” this thing called life, and not only walk it out, but move forward in their gifts and passions as well. His services are provided via webinar, phone and face-to-face. You can connect with Paul though his website setfreelife.net

Jesse Heffernan, the National Outreach and Empowerment Coordinator at Faces and Voices of Recovery, is a Certified Recovery Coach who's over 16 years sober. I was lucky enough to speak to him about finding a toxic community based on similar "woundedness," wearing a wire to bust drug dealers, whether or not he's clean cut and if the word "addict" is good or bad, among many other things. NOTE: This episode is from a Facebook Live interview that I did with Jesse, which means that the audio isn't as sharp as it is on regular episodes. Please bear with that! And please tune into my regular Facebook Live interviews, which take place at 4 pm PST on Tuesdays (unless I have a conflict, in which case I reschedule but announce the change on my page. Make sure you Like my page so stay up on the info!)

Tuesday, August 8, 2017 - 6:00 p.m. EST Chakeita Andrews is a passionate Certified Recovery Coach, Airforce Combat Veteran, and Author who has earned the reputation as an advocate of positive change across Las Vegas and beyond. She has purple hair to support, bring awareness to, and honor surviving domestic violence. Chakeita Andrews recently authored the book "The Unbroken Trained to Be Broken" and she will release a forthcoming book entitled "If You Won't Give up, I Won't Give Up" in the summer of 2018.  The Sharvette Mitchell Radio Show - www.SharvetteMitchell.com 

For firefighters and first responders, maintaining optimum mental wellness is a critical part of remaining active and effective on the job as well as at home.Constant exposure to trauma, life-threatening situations, and the physical strain of working long hours on little to no sleep can negatively impact overall mental health, increasing the vulnerability and risk of substance abuse and addiction among firefighters and first responders.My guest for this session knows this risk all too well.Don Prince served for sixteen years as a firefighter and officer for the Brookhaven fire department on eastern Long Island and progressed to the rank of Chief before moving to South Florida.Don served for a short time at the World Trade center site in the aftermath of 9/11 and continues to assist other responders in getting the help they may need with addiction, PTSD and other job-related issues.As a Certified Recovery Coach and Peer Support Specialist, Don has worked with and continues to work with such agencies as Miami-Dade Fire Rescue, Fort Lauderdale Fire Rescue, FDNY, NYPD and other public safety agencies both large and small.Don is a consultant and Lecturer for the Sweeney Alliance, an organization that promotes education and awareness to first responders about grief and loss, addiction resources, and other job-related stress.Don is also the co-founder of the The 11th Hour Trauma Retreat: http://11thhourretreat.orgYou are not alone.Don Prince, NCRC1, NCACIPhttp://sobercoachdon.com561-282-8685don@sobercoachdon.comNationally Certified Recovery Coach and Interventionist, Peer Support Specialist, Patient Advocate--Find out more at http://rescuetherescuer.com--Show sponsorsThe Addictions Academy – The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/The 11th Hour Trauma Retreat: http://11thhourretreat.orgStation Pride, Keeping Pride and Tradition

Mal is passionate about sharing her easy but powerful formula for personal transformation that she uses in her own life. She spent twenty five years addicted to alcohol and on a merry go round of meaningless relationships with men. Today she supports women in their recovery and attracting their perfect soul mates. She guides women in freeing themselves from their hidden suffering and pain and teaches them how to be deliberate creators of their own experience. Through her coaching and educational programs, women discover clarity and purpose. Mal Duane, bestselling author and Certified Recovery Coach whose book Alpha Chick Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power hit No 1 in Canada and 11 in the US on Amazon. *World Book Award for 2012 for Addiction/Recovery *Reader's Favorite Award for 2012 for Inspiration *Pinnacle Achievement Award for 2012 for Self-Help *Finalist (One of top five) in the Global E-Books Award for Self-Help

Join us as we'll discuss:How to discover what your source for true power is.How to become the deliberate creator of your own life.How to live with passion and purpose. Mal Duane CRC is an Alpha Chick extraordinaire. She built a multi-million dollar real estate company from scratch, has a dream marriage, and, as a certified Professional Life and Recovery Coach, is deeply involved with helping women discover and use their connection with the divine power within, to become their own version of an Alpha Chick. Her life experience, including recovering from a struggle with alcoholism as a young woman, has provided her with extensive hands-on, in-the-trenches experience for taking hold of a life and bringing forward the potential that lies buried beneath the scars and hurts. In 2007, she built the Katherine Holly School in Mali, West Africa, which educates 100 children annually. She is also the Founder of “Holly’s Gift”, an educational assistance fund for women. To learn more about Mal click here www.AlphaCHick.com.