Podcast appearances and mentions of ingrid clayton

Whitney Goodman interviews Dr. Ingrid Clayton about her new book "Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find Our Way Back." They explore fawning as the fourth trauma response, how it differs from people-pleasing and codependency, why children and marginalized people develop this survival strategy, and how it can masquerade as success while leading to complete self-abandonment. Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves-and How to Find Our Way Backhttps://www.ingridclayton.com/ Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠ Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft ⁠⁠Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity⁠⁠ This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute  for professional mental health advice. 00:00 Dr. Clayton's Discovery of Fawning Through Her Own Trauma 04:26 Why Fawning Isn't About Shame - It's About Survival 09:00 How to Recognize Fawning in Your Own Life 12:16 The Connection Between Fawning and Family Estrangement 19:49 Fawning vs. People-Pleasing vs. Codependency 22:13 When Fawning Looks Like Success 27:46 Growing Out of the Fawning Response Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We've all heard of fight, flight, and freeze, but what about the fourth F of trauma responses? It's called fawning and we have Dr. Ingrid Clayon join us to discuss what it looks like (leaning in even when you're uncomfortable, needing to please), why we fawn in childhood, relationships, the workplace, etc., and how to break these patterns. We discuss how fawning compares and contrasts to people pleasing, and how fawners have trouble finding healthy relationships, saying no, recognizing their own anxiety, and being honest in therapy. And Ingrid offers advice for getting curious about the trauma responses that could be holding you back, recognizing and not sabotaging healthy partners, and speaking up when you don't like something. Before Ingrid joins us, we have a SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT, Ashley gives a family/health update, and Rayna is making new friends. Enjoy!  Follow Ingrid on Instagram at @ingridclaytonphd and get her book Fawning. Follow us on Instagram @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for more. Thank you to our partners this week: Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward your membership at https://functionhealth.com/gge or use code GGE100. Smart Mouth: Get a special discount on your next SmartMouth purchase at www.smartmouth.com/gge. ZBiotics: Get 15% off your first order at https://zbiotics.com/gge with code GGE. Rocket Money: Cancel your unwanted subscriptions at https://rocketmoney.com/gge. Saks Fifth Avenue: Head to Saks Fifth Avenue or saks.com for inspiring ways to elevate your personal style. AG1: Get a free frother with your first purchase of AGZ at https://drinkagi.com/gge.

Davina McCall, one of TV's most popular presenters has a new book out, Birthing, co-written with the midwife, Marley Henry. Davina joined Anita Rani to talk about her stellar career so far, including hosting Big Brother for 10 years, campaigning for better menopause care and building a fitness empire. What makes her tick? And what drives her forward to clear hurdles such as an usual childhood, drug addiction and most recently, brain surgery for a benign tumour that she nicknamed Jeffrey?As the 50th anniversary of Papua New Guinea's independence from Australia approaches later this month, we hear why the country is currently one of the most dangerous places in the world to be a woman. Two-thirds of women in PNG have experienced some form of sexual violence in their lifetime, which is almost twice the global average. Nuala McGovern was joined by Tahina Booth, a former elite athlete and founder of Grass Skirt Project who is trying to break the cycle of gender-based violence through sport and Joku Hennah, a journalist and activist.Jung Chang's Wild Swans, the epic family memoir that followed the lives of Jung, her mother and grandmother through China's 20th century, was banned in mainland China, but was a smash hit worldwide upon publication in 1991. Now Jung's sequel, Fly, Wild Swans, brings her family's story up to date and she joined Nuala to talk about its themes. We've all heard of the fight or flight response in the face of danger, but there's also freeze, and then there's fawn, also known as people pleasing, or appeasing. Clinical psychologist Dr Ingrid Clayton has written about this in her new book, Fawning - Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find our Way Back. Nuala spoke to Ingrid about her own experiences that made her want to help others overcome this form of trauma response and what fawning looks like in practice.In 2023 Sophie Ellis-Bextor's Murder on the Dancefloor went viral on TikTok after Emerald Fennell used it in a key scene in the film, Saltburn. That resurgence, along with her popular Kitchen Discos that got lots of us through the Covid lockdown set the scene for her new album, Perimenopop, which is released tomorrow, a celebration of womanhood in middle age. Sophie joined Anita in the Woman's Hour studio.Presenter: Anita Rani Producer: Annette Wells Editor: Rebecca Myatt

If you've ever felt like you're the one who keeps the peace, says yes to everything, earns the gold stars, and never wants to disappoint anyone—even when it means abandoning yourself—this episode is for you. There's a name for that pattern, and it's not “being nice” or “just how you are.” It's called fawning. Fawning is a trauma response—right alongside fight, flight, or freeze—where you people-please, appease, or perform to keep yourself safe in relationships. It's the “please and appease” reflex: managing the emotions and needs of everyone around you to avoid conflict, rejection, or harm. And for so many high-achieving women, it can look like success… while quietly draining your mental health, your self-trust, and your sense of who you really are. I asked Dr. Ingrid Clayton, psychologist and author of the new book Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find Our Way Back, to share how to recognize the fawning trauma response, why high-achieving women are especially vulnerable to it, and practical tools to help you set boundaries, manage anxiety, and reconnect with yourself—without numbing out with alcohol. For the full shownotes, kindly go to this podcast episode link: https://hellosomedaycoaching.com/are-you-being-nice-or-stuck-in-the-fawning-trauma-response/ 4 Ways I Can Support You In Drinking Less + Living More Join The Sobriety Starter Kit, the only sober coaching course designed specifically for busy women. My proven, step-by-step sober coaching program will teach you exactly how to stop drinking  — and how to make it the best decision of your life. Save your seat in my FREE MASTERCLASS, 5 Secrets To Successfully Take a Break From Drinking  Grab the Free 30-Day Guide To Quitting Drinking, 30 Tips For Your First Month Alcohol-Free. Connect with me for free sober coaching tips, updates + videos on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest and TikTok @hellosomedaysober. Love The Podcast and Want To Say Thanks? ☕ Buy me a coffee! In the true spirit of Seattle, coffee is my love language. So if you want to support the hours that go into creating this show each week, click this link to buy me a coffee and I'll run to the nearest Starbucks + lift a Venti Almond Milk Latte and toast to you! https://www.buymeacoffee.com/hellosomeday 

On 22 August, the High court rejected Noel Clarke's claim that accusations against him by more than 20 women were false and part of a conspiracy. The writer, actor and producer of the Kidulthood trilogy sued the Guardian News & Media over seven articles and a podcast published between April 2021 and March 2022 in which women accused him of sexual misconduct. He was seeking £70 million in damages. In a high court judgment with a 220-page document, Mrs Justice Steyn rejected Clarke's claims, and ruled the newspaper had succeeded in both its defences: of truth and public interest. Nuala McGovern is joined by Katharine Viner, editor-in-chief of The Guardian, along with Lucy Osborne and Sirin Kale, the investigative journalists who uncovered the story. Finding the perfect bra can be quite difficult at the best of times but what about after breast cancer? A study by Portsmouth Hospital and the university is looking at how to develop better bras to cope with changes after cancer surgery and radiotherapy. Associate Professor Edward St John is a breast surgeon at the hospital and an academic at the university. He joins Nuala along with Celeste Ingram, a patient taking part in the research. We've all heard of the fight or flight response in the face of danger, but there's also freeze, and then there's fawn, also known as people pleasing, or appeasing. Clinical psychologist Dr Ingrid Clayton has written about this in her new book, Fawning - Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find our Way Back. Nuala spoke to Ingrid about her own teenage experiences that made her want to help others overcome this form of trauma response and what fawning looks like in practice.The Irish comedian Emma Doran is about to tour Ireland and the UK with a new stand up show, Emmaculate, and it's her third and biggest one yet, with new dates being added just this week. If you haven't caught Emma on stage you might know her from social media where her caustic takes on parenthood or schoolyard and workplace politics have hundreds of thousands of followers. She's a mother of three and she's also written a book called Mad Isn't it? which tells the story of how she got unexpectedly pregnant at 18, and after a decade of young parenthood eventually found her way into comedy. Emma joins Nuala in the Woman's Hour studio.Presenter: Nuala McGovern Producer: Andrea Kidd

In this episode, Patrick sits down with Dr. Ingrid Clayton to unpack fawning, the often-missed, deeply relational trauma response: why “people-pleasing” isn't what it seems, how power dynamics shape it, and first steps toward taking up space—without turning into someone you're not.Order your copy of Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves—and How to Find Our Way Back today!ORDER HEREJoin the Monthly Healing Community Membership

Ingrid Clayton is a licensed clinical psychologist with a master's in transpersonal psychology and a Ph.D. in clinical psychology. She's had a thriving private practice for over fifteen years and is a regular contributor to Psychology Today where her blog, “Emotional Sobriety,” has received more than 1 million views. She is the author of FAWNING: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves—And How to Find Our Way Back.   Follow her: https://www.ingridclayton.com/ https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/779579/fawning-by-dr-ingrid-clayton/ Additional Resources:

In this episode, meet clinical psychologist Dr. Ingrid Clayton, writer Carla Ciccone, and writer Sam Sussman. Tune in to hear about the personal experiences that inspired each of these authors to write their books, and what it was like to record their audiobooks. Plus, learn how sneakily difficult it is to pronounce the word “onions.” Fawning by Dr. Ingrid Clayton https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/779579/fawning-by-dr-ingrid-clayton/9798217160617/ Nowhere Girl by Carla Ciccone https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/735723/nowhere-girl-by-carla-ciccone/9780593950074/ Boy From the North Country by Sam Sussman https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/776752/boy-from-the-north-country-by-sam-sussman/9798217163625/

We all have a primary pattern of dealing with relational conflict. There are a scant few, in my experience, who do it with health and peace. The rest tend to fall into what psychologists have labeled, Fight, Flight, or Freeze tendencies. I'm not a fighter, and viewed myself as generally freezing in the moment of conflict, masked by thinking I was just being cool and calm, waiting for it to just end so I could take flight and remove myself. I thought I was valiant for my lack of fighting. Righteous and unshakable. And I thought I was protecting everyone, myself included. I did whatever it took to, choose your word: appease, placate, tolerate, or put up with. What I realize now is I was just being dishonest to myself and everyone, and while I thought I was being strong, I now view it as being incredibly weak. Again, dishonest. And what was really happening is I grew bitter and was slowly building walls with each brick of appeasing. The new term for this and what I now relate to, is Fawning. And this is the podcast today. I sat down with Dr. Ingrid Clayton who is a licensed clinical psychologist with a master's in transpersonal psychology and a Ph.D. in clinical psychology.  She's had a thriving private practice for more than sixteen years and is a regular contributor to Psychology Today, where her blog “Emotional Sobriety” has had more than a million views. She has now come out with the first ever, commercial book on this concept of fawning, it's titled, FAWNING: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves—and How to Find our Way Back. Fawning is a hallmark of codependency, and often occurs when we can't fight or flee because we have to remain in relationship with the person or situation we are struggling with. It is highly relevant to why we stay in bad jobs, fall into unhealthy partnerships, and tolerate dysfunctional environments, even when it seems obvious to others we should go or take drastic steps to try and correct things. Ingrid says fawning can serve a purpose as an emergency adaptive strategy that protects us from losing connection with people we depend on, but it becomes a real problem when it turns from the emergency coping mechanism to compulsory in our day to day lives. The good news of course is we can break the pattern of chronic fawning once we see the trauma response for what it is. I was incredibly excited to talk with Ingrid and this conversation proved invaluable for me. I hope it will be for you as well, as my feeling is that most of us suffer from aspects of fawning in certain relationships and circumstances in our lives. Connect with Ingrid on IG @ingridclaytonphd and find the new book Fawning that is hitting bookstores now. Coming up next, my conversation with Dr Ingrid Clayton on the pervasiveness of Fawning and how to get out of this insidious trauma response. Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why do we keep ending up in toxic relationships — even when we know better? ⁠Buy the book Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back ⁠ In this powerful conversation, Kwame Christian sits down with psychologist and trauma therapist Dr. Ingrid Clayton to explore the hidden reason behind this pattern: the fawning trauma response. Ingrid shares how complex trauma rewires the nervous system, why simply “setting boundaries” often doesn't work, and how shame keeps us stuck in cycles of people-pleasing. Together, they unpack the science of safety, what it really takes to break free, and why healing is less about quick tips and more about reconnecting with yourself. If you've ever wondered why saying “no” feels impossible — or why you're drawn to the very relationships that hurt you — this episode will change how you see yourself and your story. Connect with Ingrid BOOK:  FAWNING: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE:  https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3PvWTgJMirURfgHWj3h28g   WEBSITE: https://www.ingridclayton.com/  Discount code "KWAME" gives 30% discount over 3 months TL;DR what is folk? folk is a CRM, and extension, that helps businesses build real relationships and close deals. Why is folk better? folk is simple, integrated, and proactive to use. folk's value proposition? folk CRM does the busy work for you, so you can focus on growing your service business. folk's tagline folk, like the sales assistant your team never had What product details will most excite your audience? • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our seamless integrations with social channels⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our 1-click Enrichment that finds contact details for y⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠ou⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Know the best leads to reach out to with AI Follow-up⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠s⁠⁠⁠⁠ Useful links & resources •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's website⁠⁠⁠⁠ •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's Linkedin⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Simo, our CEO's, LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠folk's Youtube⁠⁠⁠ Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!⁠

Sometimes being “nice” isn't so nice—it's self-abandonment in disguise. In this episode, we learn about the fourth trauma response from Dr. Ingrid Clayton, a licensed clinical psychologist, trauma recovery expert, and author of Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find Our Way Back. Ingrid brings over 20 years of clinical experience helping people break free from trauma responses that no longer serve them. Her Psychology Today blog, Emotional Sobriety, has reached over a million readers, and her work has become a lifeline for anyone ready to stop twisting themselves into knots just to feel safe, seen, or accepted. Together, we dig into the lesser-known trauma response of fawning—what it really looks like, how it shows up in women's lives, and how it's different from (but connected to) codependency and people-pleasing. More importantly, Ingrid shares how to start unfawning so you can reclaim your voice, your needs, and your full self. We cover: The difference between compassion and compulsion How fawning hides in plain sight as “being nice” or “helpful” Why women are especially conditioned to default to fawning How to notice when you're fawning in real time Practical ways to build internal safety and stop outsourcing your worth Because survival mode kept you safe, but it will never help you thrive. Connect with Ingrid: Website: https://www.ingridclayton.com/  Book: https://www.amazon.com/Fawning-Need-Please-Makes-Ourselves/dp/B0DPZ3D78B IG: https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/  Related Podcast Episodes: People-Pleasing & Being “Needy” with Mara Glatzel | 147 How To Practice Radical Self Care with Shelly Tygielski | 302 The Power of Enough with Elizabeth Husserl | 299 Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform!

It took clinical psychologist, trauma therapist and complex trauma survivor Dr Ingrid Clayton years to understand how she had reacted to abuse within her home as a young person. But what she later understood to be a relational-trauma response known as “fawning” also helped her to make sense of her behaviour and relationships in the years that followed. And now that work informs her book, Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves. Jen chats to Ingrid about why we sometimes lean into situations that make us feel unsafe, the long-term impacts of this behaviour, and why we should revisit the narrative around trauma responses. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why do we keep ending up in toxic relationships — even when we know better? ⁠Buy the book Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back ⁠ In this powerful conversation, Kwame Christian sits down with psychologist and trauma therapist Dr. Ingrid Clayton to explore the hidden reason behind this pattern: the fawning trauma response. Ingrid shares how complex trauma rewires the nervous system, why simply “setting boundaries” often doesn't work, and how shame keeps us stuck in cycles of people-pleasing. Together, they unpack the science of safety, what it really takes to break free, and why healing is less about quick tips and more about reconnecting with yourself. If you've ever wondered why saying “no” feels impossible — or why you're drawn to the very relationships that hurt you — this episode will change how you see yourself and your story. Connect with Ingrid BOOK:  FAWNING: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE:  https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3PvWTgJMirURfgHWj3h28g   WEBSITE: https://www.ingridclayton.com/  Discount code "KWAME" gives 30% discount over 3 months TL;DR what is folk? folk is a CRM, and extension, that helps businesses build real relationships and close deals. Why is folk better? folk is simple, integrated, and proactive to use. folk's value proposition? folk CRM does the busy work for you, so you can focus on growing your service business. folk's tagline folk, like the sales assistant your team never had What product details will most excite your audience? • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our seamless integrations with social channels⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our 1-click Enrichment that finds contact details for y⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠ou⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Know the best leads to reach out to with AI Follow-up⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠s⁠⁠⁠⁠ Useful links & resources •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's website⁠⁠⁠⁠ •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's Linkedin⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Simo, our CEO's, LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠folk's Youtube⁠⁠⁠ Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!⁠

Ever said, “No worries, all good” while your insides screamed otherwise? That's not weakness. That was your nervous system doing its genius, trauma-sourced thing: fawning. In this episode, author and clinical psychologist Dr. Ingrid Clayton shows us that fawning isn't a personality flaw—it's a self-abandonment pattern we can gently unlearn, because it's costing you. Big time. We get into why fawning isn't actually “being nice.” You'll learn how it shows up day to day, and how you can start building safety from the inside out, so saying “No”, or being in conflict doesn't feel so terrifying. If you're regularly “fine with whatever,” or feel unable to express preferences, objections and big emotions, you're going to want to listen to this.    LINKS Dr. Ingrid Clayton's Website and book Ingrid on Substack Ingrid on Instagram  

We often hear about the "fight - flight" response, that instinctive reaction to a fear-inducing situation. In fact, you've likely witnessed or responded to an actual or perceived threat with protective aggression or a fearful escape. Yet two other hardwired responses--freezing and fawning--are also part of our instinctual repertoire. And while such responses are intended to keep us safe and alive when in danger, they can actually hamper self-esteem, self-worth, and interpersonal relationships when they become our default. Today, we'll take a look at how an overactive fawn response--that tendency to appease and please--can make you lose your identity as you sacrifice yourself--your core identity--to make others happy and keep the peace. Join Dr. Carla Manly and renowned psychologist and trauma expert Dr. Ingrid Clayton for an empowering journey into healing from fawning--and reclaiming your voice and your life. Topics discussed include fawning, appeasing, fight-flight response, trauma, relational trauma, complex trauma, abuse, domestic violence, gaslighting, self-gaslighting, intergenerational trauma, intergenerational patterns, support groups, people-pleasing, self-compassion, healthy love, external validation, support groups, boundaries, healthy boundaries, flexible boundaries, healthy relationships, self-love, and self-growth. Please note that this episode contains sensitive material; listener discretion is advised. Emergency Assistance Note: If you or someone you know needs immediate support, please call your emergency services. In the US, 24/7 help is available by calling "911," "988" (Suicide and Crisis Hotline), or SAMSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). Support/informational links are in the show notes.Books by Dr. Carla Manly:Joy from Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Fear-Carla-Marie-Manly/dp/1641701218 Date Smart: https://www.amazon.com/Date-Smart-Transform-Relationships-Fearlessly/dp/1641704675Aging Joyfully: https://www.amazon.com/Aging-Joyfully-Optimal-Relationships-Fulfillment/dp/1641701412 The Joy of Imperfect Love: https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Imperfect-Love-Creating-Relationships/dp/1641709057 Oracle decks by Dr. Carla Manly:Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1757477615/imperfect-love-reflection-oracle-cards Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Imperfect-Love-Reflection-Oracle-Cards/dp/B0D1Z5M4YK Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! https://drcarlamanly.com/

Fawning isn't a flaw to fix. It is a brilliant survival response that can quietly shape your entire identity until you finally have the words for it.   In this episode, I sit down with clinical psychologist and author Ingrid Clayton for a conversation that I know will resonate deeply with so many of you. We talk about fawning, what it is, how it shows up, and why it's so often misunderstood. If you've ever felt like you disappeared in a relationship or lost touch with your own needs just to keep someone else happy, you're not alone. And chances are, your nervous system was doing exactly what it needed to do to keep you safe.   Ingrid shares her own story as a survivor of complex trauma, and how that experience shaped the work she does now. We explore the difference between trauma that's tied to a single event and the kind that builds over time in ways that can be hard to name. We talk about what healing actually looks like, how to start reconnecting with yourself, how to recognize the patterns that no longer serve you, and how to hold space for the grief that sometimes comes with change.   This isn't a conversation filled with quick fixes or five-step plans. It's honest and validating. If you've ever asked yourself, “Why do I keep doing this?” or “What's wrong with me?” I hope this episode helps you see that nothing about you is broken. There's a reason for the patterns. And there's also a way through.   Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Introduction  02:08 How Personal Experience with Trauma Shaped Dr. Ingrid Clayton's Work 03:17 What Complex Trauma Really Looks Like 10:20 Fawning as a Smart and Adaptive Trauma Response 14:03 Why Codependency and People-Pleasing Miss the Point 20:20 Real-Life Examples of Fawning in Adulthood 27:20 Why Trauma-Informed Therapy Matters 30:10 Rebuilding a Relationship with Yourself 36:09 How Healing Can Change Your Closest Relationships 40:41 Dr. Clayton's Message to Anyone Who Feels Broken   Links Book: Believing Me https://amzn.to/4lkulGy Website: https://www.ingridclayton.com/   Preorder ‘Fawning' here: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/779579/fawning-by-dr-ingrid-clayton/ https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/   Connect with Dr. Z: https://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/ https://www.zgrouptherapy.com/ https://www.instagram.com/dr.z_psychologist/ https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.z_psychologist https://www.youtube.com/@DrJaimeZuckerman   Get my FREE breathing exercise here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/newsletter Register for my on demand virtual courses here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/workshops Order my workbooks! *Find Your Calm / Find Good Habits* http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/books Shop my new Mindfully Messy hoodie here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/apparel Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Dr. Ingrid Clayton is no stranger to the complexities of trauma. A clinical psychologist with over two decades of experience, she's worked at the intersection of psychology, addiction recovery, and trauma healing—long before those words became buzzwords.But her work got deeply personal with the release of her memoir Believing Me, where she named, for the first time, the covert abuse and emotional enmeshment that shaped her nervous system. It was raw, unflinching, and revolutionary in how it gave language to experiences so many of us carry but can't name.Now she's back with Fawning: The Trauma Response We Don't Talk About—a book that goes deeper into the trauma pattern she knows all too well. Not fight, not flight, not freeze. But fawn. The survival response that looks like being “easygoing,” “helpful,” or “good,” while your body quietly braces for impact.In this episode, we talk about:How Fawning builds on the foundation of Believing MeWhy fawning is so often missed—even by therapistsThe biology of appeasement and what it costs over timeWhat it means to stop being “the good one” and start being realAnd the long road from trauma bonding to boundary settingIngrid doesn't just write about trauma. She brings a level of clarity and honesty that cuts through the noise—no posturing, no sugar-coating, just deep clinical insight and lived truth.———Connect with Kallie on social media at @kali.somatics Kallie's signature program, VENOM: https://kalisomatics.com/venom To learn more about Kallie's Greece Retreat in May 2026 https://kalisomatics.com/GREECERETREAT ____________ Connect with Dr. Ingrid Clayton on social media at @IngridClaytonPhD Pre-order her new book at: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/779579/fawning-by-dr-ingrid-clayton/

George Noory and psychologist Dr. Ingrid Clayton discuss the technique of fawning to become more appealing as a protective reaction in a traumatic relationship, the importance of being honest in relationships instead of always being agreeable, and why the survival technique is often mistaken as simple people pleasing.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you ever gaslight yourself when you think of the narcissistic person in your life? Do you wonder if it's your fault, if they're right, if everyone else is more sane than you because you see the bad behavior and they don't? I've been dealing with real gaslighting from narcissists and people in my life for many years. But I've recently realized how I was doing it to myself! This week I had a lot of anger and after consulting with a friend, decided to do a meditation to help release some of it. I came across this wonderful meditation by Amy Lowery on Insight Timer: https://insig.ht/wSLC3oMRpHbI share about what helped me release my anger. Then, when the veil of anger was lifted, what I found behind it was a truth that I know deep in my bones. This will help you if you've ever suffered from narcissistic abuse. My favorite expert on narcissism: Dr. Ramani Durvasula with a book ("It's Not You") and a podcast ("Navigating Narcissism"), both INCREDIBLE. I also read a book recently by a therapist about narcissistic abuse recovery: Ingrid Clayton's "Believing Me." https://www.amazon.com/Believing-Me-Healing-Narcissistic-Complex/dp/B0BCSCYRLB/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&dib_tag=se&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PJDSHzhZ8WZbjLV12WtrttisvMiVRXpfyI7hs-eoQZuIvpnytQos3s9XEKVXul5qIpml0fcO2jd6sBxg9mdGj6L6E56NqOtX0uM3wUwP6oqAuCxQREXt9to8ltLeNuLgGfDMuNOZX6KvbrYvwP9y8g.z8SXIRvLY905d-O4t2WaARadWfPr7b4an9sTVSRWkks&qid=1708668278&sr=8-1I hope these help you on your journey while you navigate intergenerational trauma!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Grab Ingrid's Book - Believing Me Connect with Ingrid here For this special episode, I have the tough conversation of the Untouchable Mother, and dive into Dr. Ingrid Clayton's wonderful memoir Believing Me, Healing From Narcissistic Abuse.Join the Monthly Healing Community Membership

In this episode, Brandon talks with Dr. Ingrid Clayton about healing from narcissistic abuse and complex trauma. Dr. Clayton shares her personal story as we discuss her memoir, 'Believing Me', a powerful recount of her childhood trauma from a psychologist's perspective and her healing journey. Dr. Clayton also navigates through the heavy waters of trauma responses, reenactments, and how these reactions often lead to relational trauma and self-abandonment.  To reach Dr. Ingrid Clayton's website, click here. To reach Dr. Ingrid Clayton's Instagram, click here. To buy Dr. Ingrid Clayton's book 'Believing Me', click here. If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please click here or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@gmail.com To help out our podcast, please fill out our listener survey, click here. *** CONTENT WARNING - This episode discusses childhood sexual abuse. *** Thank you to our sponsor BETTERHELP. If you need online counseling from anywhere in the world, please do go to https://www.betterhelp.com/nap Get started today and enjoy 10% off your first month. Thank you to our sponsor FACTOR. To get delicious fresh healthy meals delivered to your door and ready in 2 minutes, go to Factor at https://www.factormeals.com/nap50 and use promo code NAP50 to get 50% off. If you or someone you know are experiencing abuse, you are not alone. DomesticShelters.org offers an extensive library of articles and resources that can help you make sense of what you're experiencing, connect you with local resources and find ways to heal and move forward. Visit www.domesticshelters.org to access this free resource.  If you need help moving due to domestic violence, Shelter Movers may be able to help you. They operate by referral. Clients may be referred by any person of authority (social worker, doctor, police, crisis counselor, teacher, etc.) or public agency (shelter, hospital, school, workplace, place of worship, sexual assault centre, etc.).  To reach them, click here. Join our new Community Social Network at https://community.narcissistapocalypse.com/ Join our Instagram Channel at https://www.instagram.com/narcissistapocalypse Join our Youtube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpTIgjTqVJa4caNWMIAJllA Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, Brandon talks with Dr. Ingrid Clayton about healing from narcissistic abuse and complex trauma. Dr. Clayton shares her personal story as we navigate through her memoir, 'Believing Me', a powerful recount of her childhood trauma from a psychologist's perspective and her healing journey. Dr. Clayton also navigates through the heavy waters of trauma responses, reenactments, and how these reactions often lead to relational trauma and self-abandonment.  To reach Dr. Ingrid Clayton's website, click here. To reach Dr. Ingrid Clayton's Instagram, click here. To buy Dr. Ingrid Clayton's book 'Believing Me', click here. If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please click here or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@gmail.com To help out our podcast, please fill out our listener survey, click here. *** CONTENT WARNING - This episode discusses childhood sexual abuse. *** Thank you to our sponsor BETTERHELP. If you need online counseling from anywhere in the world, please do go to https://www.betterhelp.com/nap Get started today and enjoy 10% off your first month. Thank you to our sponsor FACTOR. To get delicious fresh healthy meals delivered to your door and ready in 2 minutes, go to Factor at https://www.factormeals.com/nap50 and use promo code NAP50 to get 50% off. If you or someone you know are experiencing abuse, you are not alone. DomesticShelters.org offers an extensive library of articles and resources that can help you make sense of what you're experiencing, connect you with local resources and find ways to heal and move forward. Visit www.domesticshelters.org to access this free resource.  If you need help moving due to domestic violence, Shelter Movers may be able to help you. They operate by referral. Clients may be referred by any person of authority (social worker, doctor, police, crisis counselor, teacher, etc.) or public agency (shelter, hospital, school, workplace, place of worship, sexual assault centre, etc.).  To reach them, click here. Join our new Community Social Network at https://community.narcissistapocalypse.com/ Join our Instagram Channel at https://www.instagram.com/narcissistapocalypse Join our Youtube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpTIgjTqVJa4caNWMIAJllA

Today I wecome back clinical psychologist, author and survivor Dr.Ingrid Clayton. In Part 2 of our chat Dr. Clayton explains what Trauma Reenactment means and how that can keeps us in an endless loop of abusive relationships. We also talk about those "butterflies" and of we do in fact just "like who we like" without being able to control those feelings and why.  We discuss intermittent reinforcement in narcissistic relationships, how that strategy keeps us coming back, how hope can be damaging in an abusive setting as well as trauma responses. There is so much to unpack here let's do quit recap on what we are discussing in this episode: Trauma Reenactment Why we "like who we like"  Narcissistic relationships Hope can be damaging  Trauma responses You can find Dr. Clayton's amazing book Believing Me here. For more wisdom on the topic follow Dr. Clayton on:  Instagram  YouTube  Website  TikTok  

Dr. Ingrid Clayton is the author of "Beliving Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma" where she brilliantly shares with the world her experience surviving a narcissistic relationship in her youth, the impacts of complex trauma and how to use all of that for growth and transformation.  This is such a dense and informatitive chat that I broke it up into two episodes so you can have time to process, consider and create change in case you find yourself in this kind of relationship today.  Here Dr. Clayton describes the common strategy of narcissistic abuse the acronym D.A.R.V.O - Deny, Arrack, Reverse, Victim and Offender. This one really rang a bell for me in when reflecting about a past relationship.  This is part 1. Don't Miss Part 2 dropping next week.  You can find Dr. Clayton here: Instagram  Website 

This week on the You, The Mother Podcast, Abbey welcomes Dr. Ingrid Clayton. Dr. Ingrid is a clinical psychologist and the author of ‘Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma.' While she has a clinical background, she believes there is no theory, diagnosis, or therapy that can replace the power of shared experience. Her recent memoir is written from the heart, where all of our hurt lives—so it speaks the same language. Dr. Ingrid provides insight to how trauma shows up in our patterns of behavior, how it is stored in the body, and how we can take steps toward healing. She shares her journey, how she navigated the fallout in her family, and what has been beneficial in her healing. What is complex trauma? Let's talk about it! ——————————————— You can find Dr. Ingrid Clayton: Instagram: @IngridClaytonPhD www.IngridClayton.com Book: Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma ——————————————— Instagram @youthemother www.youthemother.com Now Offering 1-on-1 and Group Coaching! Don't forget to grab your FREE guide to sharing the load on the website! The Estrangement Project is going to Costa Rica!! Join us: https://www.trovatrip.com/trip/central-america/costa-rica/costa-rica-with-maggie--&-abbey--nov-2023 The Estrangement Project: www.theestrangementproject.com

On today's episode, the Bitches bring on Dr. Ingrid Clayton, a clinical psychologist and author of Casey's new favorite #lifechanging book, Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma. Ingrid shares the emotional story of her childhood trauma and her own journey discovering C-PTSD. We discuss, in detail, Complex PTSD and how it is similar yet different from PTSD, trauma bonding and trauma reenactment, self-gaslighting, and techniques to de-escalate an emotional flashback. Grab your tissues for this one and know that you are not alone. Your Bitches got you! Tune in or miss the F out! Support us at patreon.com/behaviorbitchespodcastInsta: @behaviorbitchespodcastFacebook: Behavior Bitches Podcast

In this episode, Luis is joined by Dr. Ingrid Clayton, a clinical psychologist and author. Her most recent book is Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma,  a memoir of her personal healing journey.Ingrid generously shares with us a bit about her own healing journey and how even as a clinical psychologist it was very difficult for her to relate to her own trauma. She explains to Luis how gaslighting was a large part of her trauma experience as a child and how as an adult a key part of her healing has been releasing hope -- hope that certain people would see, hear and believe her. She and Luis discuss how releasing hope, projections, or expectation of others actually allows for more choice and agency in relationship dynamics. Luis and Ingrid also discuss why it is so important to acknowledge and incorporate joy and laughter into trauma healing as well as the detrimental impact of maintaining the wall between "healer" and client to all parties involved. For more information on Dr. Ingrid Clayton's work, visit: https://www.ingridclayton.com/For more information on Luis' work, visit: https://www.holisticlifenavigation.com/

Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored Dr. Ingrid Clayton joins Dr. C in discussing her own history of trauma and abuse and how it has impacted her. She is a talented therapist who specializes in trauma recovery and is willing to draw upon her experiences as she remains in the role of a fellow sojourner with the clientele she assists. Sign up for Dr. Carter's NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCommunity30 Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. In the past 40+ years he has conducted more than 65,000 counseling sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Join the Team Healthy community HERE: https://survivingnarcissism.tv/subscribe/ Check out videos, articles, quizzes, and more at our website: https://survivingnarcissism.tv You can follow Surviving Narcissism on: Twitter: @SNarcissism101 Instagram: @survivingnarcissism101 Facebook: @survivingnarcissism101 Dr. Carter has two other courses that you may find to be useful: Free to Be: Reclaim & rediscover your uniqueness https://survivingnarcissism.tv/free-to-be-course/ This Is Me: Setting boundaries with the controllers in your life https://survivingnarcissism.tv/this-is-me Dr. Carter's personal website: http://drlescarter.com/ Dr. Carter's other YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/drlescarter Bookstore: https://survivingnarcissism.tv/books-on-narcissism-surviving-narcissism/

We all run into people who we find to be overbearing, self-involved,  and who like to dominate every conversation.  But what if the domineering or difficult person in your life is truly a narcissist — not just somebody who's pushy or overconfident, but who may have a personality disorder? It's a topic that seems especially timely, and thanks to one of the show's listeners for suggesting it — and in this episode, we take a peek at what makes a narcissist a narcissist, and why it can be so challenging to deal with one.Important disclaimer! I'm not a psychologist, licensed counselor, or therapist. If you're in a situation or a relationship that you feel is destructive or you don't feel safe, get help.National Domestic Violence Hotline: call 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7223) or text START to 88788 National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline: call 1-866-331-9474 or log into loveisrespect.org (interactive website)Sources for this episode:Believing Me: Healing From Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma by Ingrid Clayton"Breaking Up With a Narcissist: How to Do It & What to Expect" by Perpetua Neo, DClinPsy   https://www.talkspace.com/mental-health/conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/types/https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/signs-you-were-raised-by-narcissistshttps://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/14-signs-of-narcissismhttps://www.talkspace.com/mental-health/conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/types/https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9742-narcissistic-personality-disorderhttps://medium.com/practical-growth/safeguarding-yourself-from-narcissistic-rage-f93c64de2869https://reachoutrecovery.com/10-ways-narcissists-take-control/https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-it-together/202111/who-is-most-vulnerable-narcissists#:~:text=It%20is%20the%20person%20who,share%20and%20how%20they%20differ.https://www.wellandgood.com/vulnerable-narcissist/https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/am-i-dating-a-narcissist#no-long-term-friendshttps://www.webmd.com/mental-health/narcissism-symptoms-signs#:~:text=Not%20every%20narcissist%20has%20Narcissistic,end%20of%20the%20narcissistic%20spectrum.https://www.appliedbehavioranalysisprograms.com/lists/five-signs-narcissism/Incidental Music for this episode by Do you have comments to share or an idea for an upcoming episode? Need something overthought? I'd love to hear from you!Email me at HeresAThought8@gmail.comOr, contact me on my website at www.JanMFlynn.netOr, DM me on Twitter: @JanMFlynnAuthorTheme music courtesy of Pixabay Music

Episode 107: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma with Ingrid Clayton PHDIngrid Clayton's new memoir “Believing Me, Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma” details her childhood experiences that as an adult she came to understand as complex trauma and relational abuse. As a therapist, Ingrid shares her own story and sheds light on the similar feelings and coping strategies that spring from childhood abuse. In this episode:Ingrid talks about the process of writing her memoir and how important it was for her for the book to be a memoir, so that her story could help others who may have had similar experiences not feel so alone. We talk about how complex trauma is rooted in relational abuse and how emotional abuse can be harder to name that something like physical abuse that may leave a mark. Her book gives language to this type of abuse that happens within families. Children can often blame themselves for abuse because they are dependent on their caregivers to survive. The body and mind of a child may blame themselves as a protection because acknowledging an unsafe caregiver can feel even worse. We talk about the use of gaslighting to make children and adults question their own memories of experiences, and how that takes root in the nervous system. Gaslighting was the word of the year in the Websters dictionary for 2022, so that suggests that emotional abuse is becoming more understood and discussed. The World Health Organization has made CPTSD Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and official diagnosis, but it is still not a part of the DSM in the United States meaning that it is not a recognized diagnostic code. We talk about how trauma lives in the body and how that can make it hard to identify through thinking about it. It lives on a subconscious level. The body creates coping strategies and does what it was designed to do which is keep you safe. However, once the abusive situation is no longer a threat, those coping strategies can show up in situations and in relationships that cause distress and do not serve you any longer. We talk about the various therapeutic modalities that can be used to treat CPTSD and how curiosity is the key in each one. Ingird shares that through the process of putting this book out into the world, she has discovered that her experiences are heartbreakingly more common than she realized, and through that she has discovered a community of survivors. Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, iHeartRadio, Stitcher, or on your favorite podcast platform Quote“Maybe I had to become my own therapist, and that is both magical and...

Sherry embraces her inner Pisces and faces her ocean abandonment issues, and then she and Carla take a Love Fix question from a listener that keeps seeing the same patterns on a repeat of their relationships going nowhere fast. They then welcome Psychologist and Author Ingrid Clayton who talks about healing from narcissistic abuse and complex trauma, as well as the subtlety of self-gaslighting. She talks about the inspiration behind her memoir Believing Me, and how we can get more help and support from fawning, trauma, and codependency.    Connect with Us! The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast Get 1:1 Dating & Relationship Coaching The Love Fix Relationship Quiz   Sherry Website | Sign up for your FREE strategy call for life coaching/psychotherapy with Sherry Sherry Gaba | Psychotherapist, Life Coach & Author | Join Sherry's Inner Circle for healing from Narcissistic Abuse, Codependency, and Love Addiction -($1 trial or 1/2 off 6 months free)   Carla Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp   Ingrid  Website | Believing Me    Sign up to be in TDR database: https://www.threedayrule.com/CarlaRomo   Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love    Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.   What You'll Hear In This Episode:  What does it mean to self-gaslight?  Ingrid talks about growing up with a classic narcissistic parent and the enmeshment with her mother.  What steps can someone take if they do think they may be self-gaslighting?  Even as a trauma therapist, Ingrid couldn't first see she was dealing with complex trauma herself.  How does gaslighting get embedded in our psyche and make us doubt ourselves?  Ingrid never saw herself as codependent, but she later learned that she was extremely codependent.  How can we view codependency through the lens of trauma?  What is the fawning response?  What kept Ingrid stuck in the fawning response, and how does our body try to protect us from trauma?  More on Ingrid's book, Believing Me along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.   Disclaimer: The Love Fix Podcast content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. The Love Fix Podcast is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. The Love Fix podcast does not constitute medical consultation or treatment, health insurance does not apply.

Dr. Ingrid Clayton joins Kelly to discuss what healing from complex trauma looks like. She describes what trauma responses look like and explains that many people confuse these responses with thinking “that's just the way I am.” Dr. Clayton explains narcissistic abuse in ways that are easy to digest and also breaks down why it is so important for survivors to feel heard.Book: Believing MeSocials: @ingridclaytonphdWebsite: ingridclayton.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this episode of the Healthy + Happy Podcast, Dr. Slade is talking with special guest, Dr. Ingrid Clayton. Ingrid and Dr. Slade discuss childhood trauma (specifically the attachment trauma that can occur when a child is raised by a narcissistic parent(s).) Ingrid Clayton, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and author. Her latest book is Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma. Additionally, she is a contributor to Psychology Today where her article, “What is Self-Gaslighting?” was considered an Essential Read. Ingrid has been interviewed for countless publications including Women's Health Magazine and a guest on many podcasts including The Healing Trauma Podcast. While Ingrid has a clinical background, she believes there is no theory, diagnosis, or therapy that can replace the power of shared experience. Her recent memoir is written from the gut, from the heart, where all of our hurt lives—so it speaks the same language. In addition to raising her beautiful son, Ingrid believes that gaining the courage to write this book is her greatest achievement to date. For more information, visit www.IngridClayton.com or @IngridClaytonPhD on Instagram.

Dr. Ingrid Clayton's stepfather lacked empathy and would occasionally manipulate Ingrid with gifts. Brutal realizations come to light as her stepfather reveals his true feelings for her. Ingrid's toxic upbringing led her to having relationships with toxic men. Listen to part 2 of Ingrid's story and hear how she started taking steps on turning her life around, getting a PhD, writing a book, defending herself and saying no to every request from her parents.  Host Information:  Instagram: Dr Ramani's IG - @doctorramani Facebook: Dr Ramani's FB - @doctorramani Twitter: Dr Ramani's TW - @DoctorRamani  YouTube: Dr. Ramani's YT - DoctorRamani Guest Information:  Website: ingridclayton.com Book: Believing Me Instagram: Dr. Ingrid Clayton's IG - @ingridclaytonphd Facebook: Dr. Ingrid Clayton's FB - Ingrid Clayton, PhD Guest Bio: Ingrid Clayton, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and author. Her recent memoir is Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma. She is a contributor to Psychology Today where her article, “What is Self-Gaslighting?” is considered an Essential Read. Ingrid has been interviewed for countless publications and podcasts including Women's Health Magazine and The Healing Trauma Podcast.  #NavigatingNarcissism I want to hear from you, too. Have a toxic topic you want me to explore? Email me at askdrramani@redtabletalk.com - I just might answer you questions on air.  This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast. Navigating Narcissism is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jada Pinkett-Smith, Fallon Jethroe, Ellen Rakieten, and Dr. Ramani Durvasula. Also, PRODUCER: Matthew Jones, ASSOCIATE PRODUCER: Mara De La Rosa. EDITORS AND AUDIO MIXERS: Devin Donaghy and Calvin Bailiff.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dr. Ingrid Clayton grew up in an alcoholic household, and when her mother's second husband, her step dad, came into the picture, consistent emotional abuse ensued. This resulted in childhood trauma which affected her life long term. Part 1 of 2 of Ingrid's story is filled with examples of trauma bonding, grooming and gas lighting she received from her stepfather. As Ingrid tried to navigate life as a teenager, she sought out for her mother's help who seemed so disconnected--another sign of a narcissistic family system. Ingrid's upbringing led her down a dark path with alcohol abuse and AA. Listen to this episode and find out what Ingrid realized about her stepfather and mother, and the actions she took to start turning her life around for the better. Host Information:  Instagram: Dr Ramani's IG - @doctorramani Facebook: Dr Ramani's FB - @doctorramani Twitter: Dr Ramani's TW - @DoctorRamani  YouTube: Dr. Ramani's YT - DoctorRamani Guest Information:  Website: ingridclayton.com Book: Believing Me Instagram: Dr. Ingrid Clayton's IG - @ingridclaytonphd Facebook: Dr. Ingrid Clayton's FB - Ingrid Clayton, PhD Guest Bio: Ingrid Clayton, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and author. Her recent memoir is Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma. She is a contributor to Psychology Today where her article, “What is Self-Gaslighting?” is considered an Essential Read. Ingrid has been interviewed for countless publications and podcasts including Women's Health Magazine and The Healing Trauma Podcast.  #NavigatingNarcissism - I want to hear from you, too.  Have a toxic topic you want me to explore? Email me at askdrramani@redtabletalk.com   I just might answer you questions on air.  This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast.   Navigating Narcissism is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jada Pinkett-Smith, Fallon Jethroe, Ellen Rakieten, and Dr. Ramani Durvasula. Also, PRODUCER: Matthew Jones, ASSOCIATE PRODUCER: Mara De La Rosa. EDITORS AND AUDIO MIXERS: Devin Donaghy and Calvin Bailiff.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Am I in a trauma bond? Are we ALL in trauma bonds? Hosts Tracy T. Rowe and Cara Pressley find the answers to these burning questions on this episode of Let's Red Table That. Psychologist, author, and trauma bond survivor herself Ingrid Clayton, PhD shares how her step father's grooming led to her developing trauma bonds with romantic partners, even after years of studying for her degree. Discover for yourself if you are in trauma bonds on this episode of Let's Red Table That. Learn More about Ingrid Clayton, PhD Hosts Information: Cara Pressley @thecareercheerleader Cara's Instagram @TheCareerCheerleader Cara's Facebook @the1cheering4U Cara's Twitter @FeelinSuccessful Cara's TikTok Cara's Website Tracy T. Rowe @tracytrowe Tracy's Instagram @troweandco Tracy's Facebook @tracytrowe Tracy's Twitter @tracytrowe Tracy's TikTok Tracy's Website ---- #LRTT Listening and loving the show? Please be sure to rate and review. Have a question you want us to discuss on Let's Red Table That? Email us at: letsredtablethat@redtabletalk.com ----- LET'S RED TABLE THAT is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS Jada Pinkett Smith, Fallon Jethroe and Ellen Rakieten. PRODUCER Kyla Carneiro. ASSOCIATE PRODUCER Yolanda Chow. EDITOR AND AUDIO MIXER Stepfanie Aguilar.  MUSIC from Epidemic Sound. LET'S RED TABLE THAT is in partnership with iHeartRadio.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Am I in a trauma bond? Are we ALL in trauma bonds? Hosts Tracy T. Rowe and Cara Pressley find the answers to these burning questions on this episode of Let's Red Table That. Psychologist, author, and trauma bond survivor herself Ingrid Clayton, PhD shares how her step father's grooming led to her developing trauma bonds with romantic partners, even after years of studying for her degree. Discover for yourself if you are in trauma bonds on this episode of Let's Red Table That. Learn More about Ingrid Clayton, PhD Hosts Information: Cara Pressley @thecareercheerleader Cara's Instagram @TheCareerCheerleader Cara's Facebook @the1cheering4U Cara's Twitter @FeelinSuccessful Cara's TikTok Cara's Website Tracy T. Rowe @tracytrowe Tracy's Instagram @troweandco Tracy's Facebook @tracytrowe Tracy's Twitter @tracytrowe Tracy's TikTok Tracy's Website ---- #LRTT Listening and loving the show? Please be sure to rate and review. Have a question you want us to discuss on Let's Red Table That? Email us at: letsredtablethat@redtabletalk.com ----- LET'S RED TABLE THAT is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS Jada Pinkett Smith, Fallon Jethroe and Ellen Rakieten. PRODUCER Kyla Carneiro. ASSOCIATE PRODUCER Yolanda Chow. EDITOR AND AUDIO MIXER Stepfanie Aguilar.  MUSIC from Epidemic Sound. LET'S RED TABLE THAT is in partnership with iHeartRadio.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode 222  It's hard to know the signs of narcissistic abuse and complex trauma.  This is why I invited my guest, Dr. Ingrid Clayton, to come on the podcast and share her personal and professional knowledge of dealing with a narcissist and recovering from complex trauma.  Dr. Ingrid is a clinical psychologist and the author of the books; Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma and Recovering Spirituality: Achieving Emotional Sobriety in Your Spiritual Practice. In this episode, she shares how her book, Believing Me, helped her heal from complex trauma. Dr. Ingrid also talks about the difference between trauma & complex trauma, the symptoms of complex trauma, and shares her experience growing up in an alcoholic home. Moreover, she explains what gaslighting is and how it shows up and shares tips on healing from trauma. To read this episode's show notes, please click here.    Do You Want to Stay in Touch?  Join Lori's email community to receive inspiration and tips on how to find joy + confidence living alcohol-free later in life. Click here to join the mailing list.        

In this episode I'm joined with psychologist and trauma therapist Dr. Ingrid Clayton. Ingrid experienced abuse at the hands of her narcissistic stepfather and recently released her powerful memoir called Believing Me, about her survival as a child and adult healing from narcissistic and complex trauma.https://www.Ingridclayton.com Her memoir https://www.amazon.com/Believing-Me-Healing-Narcissistic-Complex/dp/B0BCSCYRLB/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8 Work with Monique https://wwwthehealingtraumapodcast.com

Dr. Ingrid Clayton joins Kelly to discuss what healing from complex trauma looks like. She describes what trauma responses look like and explains that many people confuse these responses with thinking “that's just the way I am.” Dr. Clayton explains narcissistic abuse in ways that are easy to digest and also breaks down why it is so important for survivors to feel heard.Book: Believe MeSocials: @ingridclaytonphdWebsite: ingridclayton.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

After repeated exposures to exploitative, manipulative narcissists, a person can experience identity confusion and emotional turmoil. Dr. Les Carter has an enlightening discussion about this problem with clinical psychologist, Dr. Ingrid Clayton. Drawing from her new memoir, Believing Me: Healing From Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma, she explains the common trauma responses of fight, flight, freeze, and fawning. Dr. Clayton makes it clear that even in the aftermath of trauma with a narcissist, healing can happen. Hope is within reach as you learn to listen to your own voice. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your online presence and get 40% off of all plans using my link: https://aura.com/DrCarter Sign up for Dr. Carter's NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCommunity30 Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. In the past 40+ years he has conducted more than 65,000 counseling sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Join the Team Healthy community HERE: https://survivingnarcissism.tv/subscribe/ Check out videos, articles, quizzes, and more at our website: https://survivingnarcissism.tv You can follow Surviving Narcissism on: Twitter: @SNarcissism101 Instagram: @survivingnarcissism101 Facebook: @survivingnarcissism101 Dr. Carter has two other courses that you may find to be useful: Free to Be: Reclaim & rediscover your uniqueness https://survivingnarcissism.tv/free-to-be-course/ This Is Me: Setting boundaries with the controllers in your life https://survivingnarcissism.tv/this-is-me Dr. Carter's personal website: http://drlescarter.com/ Dr. Carter's other YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/drlescarter Bookstore: https://survivingnarcissism.tv/books-on-narcissism-surviving-narcissism/ If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter has a sponsor who can assist. As the need is there, please seek the help you deserve: https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast We receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. We only recommend services that we trust. To learn more about Dr. Clayton, you can visit her website: IngridClayton.com You also can follow her on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/IngridClaytonPhD) and Instagram (@IngridClaytonPhD)

We're honored to start off season 3 with the incredible Dr. Ingrid Clayton. In this episode we talk about complex PTSD, trauma bonding and her personal healing journey with childhood, narcissistic abuse and the events that led her to creating her memoir.Ingrid shares about her survival and her deep awakening to her own truth with trauma and the abuse she faced as a child. She explains, through this discovery, how she is finally able to take advantage of the tools she's learned and used to help so many other people in her practice and apply them to her own experiences to begin healing herself.Through much of this healing, Ingrid also shares the details that led to her unintentional memoir and in doing so, for the first time how she was able to see her trauma story through the lenses of a psychologist.This episode is full of actionable steps and advice for your own healing journey as well as bringing awareness and understanding about trauma.To be a part of Ingrid's growing community and connect with her, you can follow her on Instagram @ingridclaytonphd (https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/?hl=en)Also you can visit her website to stay up to date on her fourth coming memoir.https://www.ingridclayton.com/If you personally felt connected to the show and/or this episode and would like to purchase one of the few limited edition prints of the art that goes along with is as your own personal reminder to step into your own power you can do so on our website at www.iampower.clubPrint sales help us continue this mission to bring you inspiring stories that the world needs to hear.We would love for you to follow us on Instagram. Share and tag us in your stories @iampowerclub ( https://www.instagram.com/iampowerclub/ )You can also find us on Facebook @ https://www.facebook.com/iampowerpodcast/And of course don't forget to like and subscribe to our channel so you don't miss next weeks episode!Thank you so much for joining this community and we can't wait to meet you!

My guest today is Ingrid Clayton, Phd. A clinical psychologist working with trauma survivors and a survivor herself. Today we are having a candid discussion about gaslighting and self gaslighting and why we do it and what it really is. Ingrid can be found at www.ingridclayton.com and Instagram @ingridclaytonphd

Co-hosts Natasha Levinger are excited to welcome Ingrid Clayton, author & psychologist.  In this interview they discuss recovering from narcissistic abuse, pursuit of excellence to hide shame, writing from intuition and inspiration, trauma from psychological abuse, minimization of trauma as a coping strategy, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), shame as a key diagnostic component of CPTSD, emotional flashbacks and how they different from event-based flashbacks, seeing your own worth, how trauma can feel like "home", and more. In the usual weekly segments, Tess & Natasha cover managing a crisis of confidence, a child's need to blame oneself, how shame can be hopeful, the dynamics of self-blame, Natasha & Tess's respective relationships to The Holidays, plugging your energy into your own truth, the beauty of autumn, a financial abundance ritual for the full moon this week, asserting your truth, fiercely protecting your inner child this week, and more! Plus... Tess's 2022 Your Most Magical Year Yet! planner is now available to purchase! Sign up for Natasha's newsletter to get monthly energy healing thoughts and insights, plus some free audio guided meditations. Please rate and review us on Apple Podcasts!  Thanks to those who already have! It really helps spread the word about Magic Monday You can sign up for the Magic Monday newsletter if you want a little extra magic (and Tess & Natasha) in your inbox once a month.  Natasha has a page on Insight Timer.  You can listen to a free chakra clearing meditation, with more meditations coming soon.  We have a hotline, y'all!  Leave us a question on our voicemail at (828) 333-7181 and we'll answer it on air. Check out the Magic Monday Podcast Listeners facebook page for an active community of fellow travelers on the magic path. Goddess Provisions boxes are a great way to treat yourself.  If you choose to buy one, use this link to support the show!

On today's episode, author and Trauma Psychologist & Therapist Dr. Ingrid Clayton will be sharing her own journey of healing from Complex Trauma & parental Narcissistic Abuse. She is the author of the book Recovering Spirituality and her upcoming memoir Maybe It Wasn't That Bad. She talks about how she was awakened to her own traumatic past and how her trauma showed up in her life. ✅REGISTER FOR AN UPCOMING LIVE WEBINAR with Dr Clayton and myself called SELF-GASLIGHTING: HOW WE HAVE INTERNALIZED A NARCISSISTIC PARENT'S GASLIGHTING FROM CHILDHOOD and how to identify less with your trauma and more with your True Self. Link to register here: https://bit.ly/3nxWduA You can find Dr Clayton on IG @ ingridclaytonphd. Check out www.thehealingtraumapodcast.com

Ingrid is back with her husband Richard but this time the spotlight is solely on her. Ingrid has written an amazing book, Good Grades Rock!: But A+ Does Not Equal Success. She maps out their journey in coming to Canada and building their own financial education. Ingrid covers everything from debt to life insurance, business building to credit cards, real estate to the coming debt crisis and more. She has put together an excellent read and we're very proud to be able to share her message on The Your Life! Your Terms! Show. You can learn more about the book and get access to her financial literacy workshops at www.FinancialLiteracyRocks.com.

Ingrid Clayton, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and the author of her newly published memoir Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma.IG @ingridclaytonphd⬇️DAMN THE JOIN SHITSHOW - ADULT CHILD HEALING COMMUNITY⬇️https://theshitshow.mn.co✅ 4 weekly zoom support groups✅ Support community at your fingertips with discussion boards and chat

What happens when speaking your truth means losing the very people you've spent your whole life trying to please? For so many adult children, breaking the silence around abuse and dysfunction doesn't bring closeness—it brings exile, denial, and the gut-punch of realizing love was always conditional.Dr. Ingrid Clayton is a clinical psychologist, trauma therapist, and the author of Believing Me: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Complex Trauma and Fawning Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves–and How to Find Our Way Back. Beyond her professional expertise, Ingrid shares her deeply personal story of surviving childhood narcissistic abuse, decades of gaslighting, and ultimately being estranged from her family after telling the truth. In this conversation, she opens up about how breaking silence became both the greatest heartbreak of her life—and the most powerful step toward reclaiming herself.