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Susie Czorz Brown, an experienced EFM shares her personal story and ideas for how to prevent a home invasion burglary. To work with Susie directly connect at: www.healthyexpatparent.com Find all the experts at www.thebigpurpleblob.com
In this episode, I'm giving you a behind-the-scenes look at how we set up meetings, pitch films, and close deals. From wrangling 18 buyer meetings a day to figuring out which trailer makes a film sell—this is a real-world guide to the hustle of film sales.
Connect with us at: www.thebigpurpleblob.com Tell us your story, share your ideas for episode topics, set up a time to talk with one of us for personal coaching and find more purpose in your overseas life. Lisa Tilstra, Angi Solley, Sharoya Ham, Susie Czorz-Brown are all HERE for it!
SRI360 | Socially Responsible Investing, ESG, Impact Investing, Sustainable Investing
In this episode, I'm talking with Bettina von Hagen, Managing Director & CEO of EFM Investments & Advisory. Since founding Ecotrust Forest Management 20 years ago, she's been redefining forestry investment – consistently beating traditional market-rate returns while protecting ecosystems, communities, and future generations.Bettina grew up in politically turbulent Lima, Peru, with a scholar father, an artist-entrepreneur mother, and a childhood shaped by earthquakes, curfews, and curiosity. Her love of systems thinking began with a trip to the Galápagos Islands at age 14 and eventually led her to study evolutionary biology before pivoting to business.After earning her MBA at the University of Chicago, Bettina entered the world of commercial banking in the Pacific Northwest – right in the middle of the timber wars. But instead of picking a side, she asked a different question: How do we meet essential needs – like timber – without compromising ecosystems or future generations?That question led her to Ecotrust, a nonprofit focused on conservation-based development. There, she helped launch Craft3, a triple-bottom-line lender, and Beneficial State Bank. But the real spark came in 2004, when she co-founded EFM within Ecotrust to pioneer sustainable forest investing.By 2008, she bought a stake in the company and stepped in as CEO.EFM now manages 200,000 acres and nearly $500M in assets, with a staff of just 11 people and a vast network of contractors. Their model isn't just about timber. It's about carbon credits, conservation easements, water protection, salmon runs, tribal partnerships, and restoring degraded ecosystems.Bettina's forestry strategy is built on what she calls the Five R's:Rotation: Letting trees grow longer for higher-value wood.Retention: Leaving 10–30% of trees to support soil, seedbanks, and habitat.Reserves: Protecting special ecological areas, like salmon-bearing streams.Restoration: Rebuilding habitat, especially in fire-prone and aquatic systems.Relationships: Partnering with tribes, local communities, and land trusts.EFM's forests generate revenue through multiple streams. When timber prices dip, they don't rush to harvest – instead, they “store value on the stump.” Trees continue to grow, becoming more valuable over time. Carbon markets make this kind of patience financially viable.By deferring cuts, selling carbon offsets, or securing conservation easements, EFM creates liquidity without compromising ecological integrity.The results speak for themselves. Every fund exit has outperformed the NCREIF Timberland benchmark, and every acre under EFM's care becomes more ecologically and socially valuable over time.Forests don't have to be sacrificed for growth. In Bettina's hands, they are growth.Tune in to hear how she's building a forestry model that works – for investors, ecosystems, and future generations.—About the SRI 360° Podcast: The SRI 360° Podcast is focused exclusively on sustainable & responsible investing.—Connect with SRI360°:Sign up for the free weekly email updateVisit the SRI360° PODCASTVisit the SRI360° WEBSITEFollow SRI360° on XFollow SRI360° on FACEBOOK—Additional Resources:- Bettina LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bettina-von-hagen/- EFM LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/efminvest/- EFM Website: https://efmi.com/
Does your child have special educational needs? If so, this is the episode for you! Education Consultant Aisha Smith and Janelle Meyers, Founder of Global Village Tutors, explain what parents should do before leaving post and what they need to do once they arrive in the States to ensure their child has the smoothest transition possible into a US-based school. Aisha Smith: aisha@sageeducationconsulting.com Parent Pathway to IEP Success ToolKit Janelle Meyer: https://www.globalvillagetutors.org/ Sharoya Ham: www.embracebehaviorchange.com Send us your ideas at www.thebigpurpleblob.com The Big Purple Blob is here to support YOU with the expert insights on HOW to live your best Diplo-life.
A deep dive into what it means to be a Third Culture Kid “Letters Now Sent” Book Invitation: You are invited to submit a written piece for the book, “Letters Now Sent.” Inspired by Ruth Van Reken's book "Letters Never Sent", "Letters Now Sent" will be a collection of letters from TCKs, parents of TCKs, and system leaders to share personal stories about their experiences with TCKs/being a TCK themself/raising TCKs. This book is a fusion of both memoir and anthology written in a specific "Dear ___[name]___" format. Here is the Google Form link to submit a letter with additional details about length and content prompts: https://forms.gle/jQyzq3TtFqfyznvCA. Please contact Megan Norton (megancnorton@gmail.com) if you have any questions about this book project. “A Work of Heart”, a project led by Simona Wiig and Megan Norton, invites any individual who has had a Third Culture experience to submit their artwork expressions depicting their cross-cultural story for the first volume of art collections (including any visual rendering, song lyrics, poetry, videography, etc.) for and by CCKs/TCKs/migrants/global nomads/whatever ‘label' that encompasses the Third Culture experience. Both Simona Wiig and Megan Norton are creators, artists, dreamers, and Adult TCKs who desire to showcase the Third Culture experience through visual artwork created by fellow friends who have grown up crossing-cultures. Submissions are due by May 1, 2025 for Volume 1. Please contact Megan Norton (megancnorton@gmail.com) if you have any questions about this book project.
In this episode of the Your Next Mission® video podcast, SMA Tilley hosts Austin Carrigg, Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Exceptional Families of the Military (EFM), alongside her husband, SGM Joshua Carrigg, Operations Sergeant Major for USAMDW/JTF-NCR and theirdaughter, Melanie. The discussion focuses on how EFM aids military families with special needs children and educates them on what life is really like as a Departmentof Defense Exceptional Family Member Program (EFMP) family.
Send us a textEver feel like fetal heart rate tracings are speaking a language you don't quite understand? In this episode, Missi and Cara are here to translate--they are diving deep into the world of FHR tracings, breaking down the physiology and naming those tricky patterns. They'll also share their go-to interventions and actionalble steps for non-reassuring tracings, and, of course, there will be plenty of those *asterisk* moments—because, let's face it, those little side notes are like sparklers of wisdom! Cara and Missi will also have you ready to take on certification in EFM for career advancedment and professional development--tune in for a lively discussion that will have you feeling confident and ready to interpret those squiggles like a pro. #EFM #EFMC #NCC #Certification #HiImTheProblemItsMe #Asterick #Fireworks #TalkNerdyToMe #ReviewED #deliverEDExamPrep #EFMCReviewED #DroppinAcidBase #Uteroplacental #AsEasyAsABC123 #OxygenationIsTheGoal #Sparklers #Fireworks #LikeAFirework @ncccertification @bluelaundrydesign
Send us a textEver feel like fetal heart rate tracings are speaking a language you don't quite understand? In this episode, Missi and Cara are here to translate--they are diving deep into the world of FHR tracings, breaking down the physiology and naming those tricky patterns. They'll also share their go-to interventions and actionalble steps for non-reassuring tracings, and, of course, there will be plenty of those *asterisk* moments—because, let's face it, those little side notes are like sparklers of wisdom! Cara and Missi will also have you ready to take on certification in EFM for career advancedment and professional development--tune in for a lively discussion that will have you feeling confident and ready to interpret those squiggles like a pro. #EFM #EFMC #NCC #Certification #HiImTheProblemItsMe #Asterick #Fireworks #TalkNerdyToMe #ReviewED #deliverEDExamPrep #EFMCReviewED #DroppinAcidBase #Uteroplacental #AsEasyAsABC123 #OxygenationIsTheGoal #Sparklers #Fireworks #LikeAFirework @ncccertification @bluelaundrydesign
Let's find out what the options are for meeting with a therapist in the Diplomatic community these days. Have you been wondering if therapy could help you? Are you struggling to find the right therapist for your needs? Frustrated with therapists who don't understand the challenges of expatlife? Connect with us at: https://thebigpurpleblob.com Therapists Shanon Miller and Brittney Foose from Apricity Expat Therapy offer practical guidance to help you live your best life in 2025 through therapy. https://apricityexpattherapy.com/ To work with Sharoya directly check out: www.embracebehaviorchange.com
This episode comes at an important time when so many USAID families are seeking new work after sudden termination without cause. Find out more at: www.TheBigPurpleBlob.com Work with Ben Fowle FormerFed on Substack https://formerfed.substack.com/p/navigating-the-federal-layoffs
Tue, 18 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/72-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-indiewire 63c282ff5fa83970dcdde124cff5ba6a Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Ryan Lattanzio from IndieWire, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no EFM,European Film Market,IndieWire,Ryan Lattanzio,Film Industry,Wendy Mitchell,Berlinale,Morning Brief,Industry Session European Film Market
Mon, 17 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/68-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-screen-international 10ca421f28bea3cea9bdeb4285cc5a2f Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Louise Tutt from Screen International, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no EFM,European Film Market,Berlinale,Wendy Mitchell,Morning Brief,Screen International,Louise Tutt,Film Industry European Film Market
Sun, 16 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/70-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-deadline a1f84d978d573e50c0cbc2c0f8c6a26f Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Diana Lodderhose from Deadline, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no EFM,European Film Market,Berlinale,Wendy Mitchell,Deadline,Diana Lodderhose,Morning Brief,Film Industry European Film Market
Sun, 16 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/67-from-local-to-universal-serial-storytelling-for-global-audiences 547dccba98c2816635fec9482d0e85f0 Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast is presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale. Hosted by editor and journalist Michael Schneider, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. In this episode, we bring together a diverse group of industry experts for a dynamic conversation about the ever-evolving world of TV series. We delve into what makes a series truly international—what allows a show to break through cultural and language barriers and resonate with audiences worldwide? Is it the warmth of relatable characters that audiences are seeking during challenging times, or is it the exploration of social-political issues and dystopian themes that capture our collective attention? Ultimately, the answer lies in universally compelling stories that speak to viewers beyond the confines of a single market. While it may be a tougher feat for comedy, there's a clear call for future series to transcend these boundaries and reach a global audience. In this discussion, Anna Rohde, Steve Matthews, Maria Cervera, and Paul Telegdy offer their unique perspectives on the international series market, providing predictions on where global audiences are headed next. They also explore the current trends shaping the industry, including the impact of financial shifts. Tune in to hear the experts tackle the future of series content and its journey across the globe. The Berlinale Series Market is the EFM's boutique market for serial content from all over the world. From February 16 to 19, industry experts, creatives, buyers and distributors will meet again at CinemaxX at Potsdamer Platz and Gropius Bau. Steve Matthews is the Head of Scripted, Creative, at Banijay Entertainment, where he plays a pivotal role in the group's production development process, leading on creative initiatives for original drama projects. Before joining Banijay Entertainment, Matthews was VP and Executive Producer, Scripted, at HBO Europe, having joined the business back in 2014. In that post, he partnered with local teams across Central Europe, Spain and Nordics, to spearhead the development of original series, miniseries, and international adaptations. His portfolio included Pustina, Umbre, Blinded By The Lights, Uspjeh, The Sleepers, Foodie Love, Gösta; and from Banijay Entertainment's footprint specifically, 30 Coins (Pokeepsie), Beforeigners (Rubicon), and Beartown (Filmlance). Additionally, Matthews is dedicated to mentoring talent, and set up Banijay Bootcamp, a specific programme for scripted creatives. Before joining Germany's distribution and production house Beta Film GmbH as International Creative Executive & Content Editor, Anna Rohde studied dramaturgy, philosophy, and literature at Munich's Theatre Academy and at Ludwig Maximilian University Munich. Before her studies, she worked as assistant director in many national and international TV and feature films. She is member of Germany's VeDRA (Verband für Film- und Fernsehdramaturgie e.V.), jury member of e.g. the International Emmy's semi-finals, the Council of Europe Eurimages development award and – among others - mentor of SFF's (Sarajevo Film Festival) CineLink workshop, the post-graduate Serial Eyes writing program. As content editor, she has been working on many internationally successful shows from the CEE region, most recently on the multi-awarded THE SILENCE (2021-2023) and GOLDEN BOY (2021), Jasmila Zbanic's Venice premiered I KNOW YOUR SOUL (2023), and the Canneseries-awarded OPERATION SABRE (2024). Maria Cervera is Head of Content for Cattleya Producciones, part of ITV Studios in Spain. During her 20 year+ professional path she has focused on series development and production for local and international markets, with previous roles at Paramount's International TV Studio as Head of Content for EMEAA and within the Netflix International team. She also teaches at several writing programs including Berlin's Serial Eyes and Spain's screenwriters' guild-sponsored master. Paul Telegdy has worked across all genres of content, on brands as diverse as Top Gear, Teletubbies, Dr Who, The Voice and Planet Earth, to name a handful. Paul worked at NBCUniversal for 12 years, becoming Chairman of NBC in 2019, before that the BBC for ten years. In 2021, Paul co-founded The Whole Spiel, a media, entertainment, and gaming company based in Berlin and Los Angeles. With a degree in Korean and Japanese, and having lived in Switzerland, Austria, Belgium, Japan, The US and the UK, Paul has a distinctly global view of content and opportunity. The host Michael Schneider has been covering the business of television for more than 25 years — most of that time at Variety, where he oversees television coverage as its TV Editor. Schneider has won several entertainment journalism awards and also regularly contributes to local outlets including Spectrum News 1 and KCRW. He was previously Executive Editor at IndieWire; the Chief Content Officer for TV Guide Magazine; and TV Editor at Daily Variety. Mike regularly moderates industry and TV show panels at events including Comic-Con, PaleyFest, HRTS, NATPE and others, and once won a staring contest with Jon Hamm on the Dolby Theatre stage. This podcast episode has been developed in collaboration with Variety. The Berlinale's European Film Market is the first international film market of the year, where the film industry starts its business. Industry Insights - The EFM Podcast puts a spotlight on highly topical and trendsetting industry issues, thereby creating a compass for the forthcoming film year. The year-round podcast is produced in cooperation with Goethe-Institut and co-funded by Creative Europe MEDIA. full no Berlinale,European Film Market,EFM,Entertainment Business,Series,TV,Deadline European Film Market
Sat, 15 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/73-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-the-spot-media-film 60148b8a54cbf2dc1fda8378411a2a43 Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Thomas Schultze from THE SPOT media & film, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no EFM,European Film Market,Wendy Mitchell,SPOT media & film,Thomas Schultze,Film Industry,Morning Brief,Berlinale,Industry Sessions European Film Market
Fri, 14 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/71-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-the-hollywood-reporter 112749309745f4fc2f2be7917682f258 Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Scott Roxborough from The Hollywood Reporter, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no EFM,European Film Market,Wendy Mitchell,Morning Brief,Scott Roxborough,THR,The Hollywood Reporter,Film Industry,Berlinale European Film Market
David Wessel - author of Choosing Sides, the tale of an ordinary family torn apart by Hitler's Germany https://www.amazon.com/CHOOSING-SIDES-David-K-Wessel/dp/1952439779 Sharoya Ham and Katie Fowle - Help my child won't go to school https://www.amazon.com/Help-My-Child-Wont-School-ebook/dp "If there is a book you want to read but it hasn't yet been written, you must be the one to write it." ~ Toni Morrison AFSA November issue has a listing of all identified books published by Foreign Service members. Find a supportive community who can contribute to the end product. Reviewers, illustrators, proof-readers. It pays to find an experienced, non-biased, expert to give feedback. www.shutupandwrite.com
Thu, 13 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/66-reinventing-reality-independent-documentaries-in-times-of-change eec2f5357719b6f2cac8dbcf0ce4fe87 Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast is presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale. Hosted by editor and producer Matt Carey, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. In this episode, two outstanding figures in the documentary filmmaking world share their perspectives on the current state of the non-fiction film industry. Kazuhiro Sōda, director and jury member of the Berlinale Documentary Award 2025, offers insights into his own filmmaking process and presents his ten commandments for independent documentary filmmaking. He reflects on how to achieve creative freedom, the distribution challenges documentary filmmakers face, and the crucial role of film festivals, especially as theatrical distribution of non-fiction films declines. Sōda explains how he lets his projects come to him, without needing to prove a theme to anyone but himself, revealing his observational filmmaking style—evident in his signature inclusion of cats. Lois Vossen, founding executive producer of Independent Lens on PBS, discusses how documentary filmmakers are finding innovative ways to distribute their films during this transitional period for the industry. Independent filmmakers with limited resources are creating works of international significance, strengthening the global documentary scene. She explains how Independent Lens selects projects and stories that need to be seen by American audiences, aiming to bridge divides by helping people see one another as they truly are. Both guests also provide a preview of the upcoming non-fiction films at this year's Berlinale, promising a diverse and important range of perspectives on the rapidly changing world around us. From February 14 to February 18, the EFM DocSalon will serve as an exclusive meeting point for the documentary industry, where all documentary activities, ranging from talks, networking, consultations and roundtables, will take place within the EFM Industry Sessions conference and networking programme. This all happens in the Café Connect in the Documentation Centre for Displacement, Expulsion, Reconciliation, just a three-minute walk from Gropius Bau. The Main Partner of the DocSalon ist FilmFernsehFonds Bayern, and Deadline is the Media Partner. Born in Ashikaga, Japan, in 1970, Kazuhiro Soda studied directing at the School of Visual Arts in New York. From Campaign (2007) and Mental (2009) to Inland Sea (2018) and Zero (2020) and most recently The Cats of Gokogu Shrine (2024), a large number of his eleven documentaries to date have been shown at the Berlinale. In addition to the Ecumenical Jury Prize in the Forum for Zero, he has already been honoured with the Peabody Award, the Marek Nowicki Award from the Helsinki Foundation for Human Rights and prizes at the festivals in Busan and Hong Kong. His book 'Why I Make Documentaries' has been published in Japan, as well as in English, Korean and Chinese. He is a part of the Jury for the Berlinale Documentary Award 2025. Lois Vossen has been the founding executive producer of Independent Lens on PBS since 2002. She leads the programming of a diverse slate of 25-30 original documentaries, made by independent filmmakers, with each season covering an array of social, political, and cultural issues, showcasing Independent Lens as an evolving multiplatform series. The Host Matthew Carey serves as Documentary Editor at Deadline.com, covering the landscape of nonfiction film. He produces and co-hosts Deadline's weekly Doc Talk podcast. Carey is the former Senior Producer at CNN, where he wrote and produced documentary specials. He earned two Peabody Awards and a DuPont-Columbia Award for his contributions to CNN's coverage of politics and breaking news. He is based in Los Angeles. This podcast episode has been developed in collaboration with Deadline. The Berlinale's European Film Market is the first international film market of the year, where the film industry starts its business. Industry Insights - The EFM Podcast puts a spotlight on highly topical and trendsetting industry issues, thereby creating a compass for the forthcoming film year. The year-round podcast is produced in cooperation with Goethe-Institut and co-funded by Creative Europe MEDIA. full no Film Business,European Film Market,EFM,Entertainment Industry,Film Industry,Media Industry,Berlinale,Documentary,Documentary Films,Distribution European Film Market
Thu, 13 Feb 2025 06:45:00 +0000 https://efm-industry-insights.podigee.io/69-2025-efm-morning-brief-with-variety 491a7492af0e0dc9b48683d3a19d224c Kick off your EFM day with this short morning coffee companion: our daily EFM Morning Brief. 10 minutes to keep you up to speed with the latest news – today provided by our guest correspondent Elsa Keslassy from Variety, followed by our "what's on for today" to help you navigate our EFM Industry Sessions and spot highlights and tips for the day. Make sure to tune into our EFM Morning Brief to stay on top of all the essentials and get the latest EFM buzz, hosted by Wendy Mitchell. EFM Morning Brief is part of the year-round podcast series Industry Insights – The EFM Podcast presented by the European Film Market of the Berlinale - hosted by industry analyst Johanna Koljonen and curator-producer Nadia Denton, it delves deep into the rapidly evolving film industry. full no Wendy Mitchell,EFM,European Film Market,Berlinale,Elsa Keslassy,Variety,Film Industry,Morning Brief European Film Market
A missionary service with the Jacob Litchfield family, missionaries to Thailand with EFM
Are film festivals like Sundance, Toronto, and Cannes the best place to sell your movie, or should you focus on film markets like AFM, EFM, and the Marché du Film? In this episode, we break down the key differences between festivals and markets, revealing where real deals happen and how filmmakers can maximize their chances of securing distribution.
"If you think you aren't doing it well, that thought means your heart is turned to your kid, and you are already 70% there," says Dr. Jean Kawiecki. As a psychologist, educator, and adult TCK Dr. Kawiecki is deeply passionate about helping TCKs and their parents through the various transitions of TCK life. Talk with Sharoya directly to get more support in your parenting: www.embracebehaviorchange.com Resources mentioned: The Place We Find Ourselves Podcast by Adam Young Six Core Needs of Kids by Adam Young Misunderstood by Tanya Crossman Raising Up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids: A Practical Guide to Preventive Care by Lauren Wells The Grief Tower: A Practical Guide to Processing Grief with Third Culture Kids by Lauren Wells The RAFT
In this episode, we dive into everything you need to know about the European Film Market (EFM) in Berlin. From navigating key locations like the Gropius Bau and Marriott to setting up meetings with industry players, this guide is packed with tips for first-timers and seasoned attendees. Discover how to prepare for Berlin's chilly weather, use Cinando for research, network effectively, and get into exclusive events and parties.
In this episode, we dive into the must-know tips for filmmakers attending the European Film Market (EFM) in Berlin. Learn how to perfect your 2-minute pitch, build a powerful network, create a standout business plan, set up key meetings in advance, and master the art of follow-up. Whether you're pitching your film or forging connections, these strategies will help you navigate one of the industry's most focused markets. Tune in and get ready to make an impact at EFM! #EFM2025 #FilmmakingPodcast #FilmIndustryTips #Berlinale #FilmNetworking
Starting a New Career: The Time Is Now! Are you an EFM looking for meaningful and profitable work that has longevity? World-renowned Marketing Coach Amel Derragui joins Katie Fowle and Sharoya to discuss how EFMs can turn their passions into portable businesses. Katie and Sharoya share their personal stories of creating businesses that are rewarding, impactful, and sustainable from post to post. Connect using these links: amelderragui.com Podcast: The Time is Now To create more connected communicaation in your family you can work with Sharoya: www.embracebehaviorchange.com
Podcast Description: The Ultimate Guide to International Film Sales In this episode, we break down the ultimate guide to international film sales!
Jenn is a licensed therapist who was looking for a therapist at her challenging first post abroad. When she struggled to find the help she needed, it inspired her to start her own practice -- Bloom Counseling.In this interview, I chat with Jenn about how accompanying partners can build better self-care practices by finding out what works for them, remembering what they love, and pursuing their own dreams not 'instead of' but 'in addition to' the demands of their spouses' careers..BIOJen Evans is an EFM, therapist, and Mom who started her private practice, Bloom Counseling, while posted in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.Jen found herself halfway across the world with a newborn and toddler during COVID and amongst a burgeoning civil war. She searched for her own therapy but could not find a therapist who was willing to work with her while posted overseas and who understood the challenges of expat life.Away from her own support system, she noted this gap in care for diplomats and expats and founded Bloom Counseling to address those needs.Four years later, she is posted in Mexico City with her husband, two young girls, and a Bernese Mountain Dog. She feels fortunate to meet the unique needs of her community every day.Connect with Jen:https://bloomwithjenn.comhttps://www.facebook.com/BloomWithJenn/instagram.com/bloom.counseling
Elizabeth Streett did everything right: going to college and becoming a diplomat. She met all the criteria for what anyone would see as successful. But success didn't really end up being what she sought, and it turns out that was the wrong word to use anyway. After discovering that life as a diplomat didn't have the room for the kinds of joy that she wanted to prioritize in life, she left the profession. Becoming an EFM a few weeks later was an unexpected result. Today Elizabeth focuses on her key values and helps others use their key values to declutter their lives, both physically removing items that don't fit their happiest version of themselves, but also decluttering their mental and financial loads. Streett's method is about removing items that represent outdated versions of ourselves while asking why we have certain things and if they reflect who we want to be. This process emphasizes making choices based on our desired selves rather than simply counting items or fitting them into spaces.How does she follow her own core values of authentic communication, joy, simplicity, curiosity, and nature? Find out in this episode!-----------------Elizabeth Streett grew up following the traditional markers of success, excelling academically and professionally as a U.S. diplomat. Despite her achievements, she grappled with a lack of genuine happiness and fulfillment, feeling bound by external standards rather than internal joy. Her turning point came when she noticed her son's struggles in a conventional school setting, prompting Elizabeth to reevaluate her life's direction and her family's well-being. She left her career, embracing a simpler, values-driven life focused on joy, authenticity, and community. Now, Elizabeth shares her journey from a “perfect” life to one that is truly fulfilling, inspiring others to pursue intentional, minimalist paths in the pursuit of genuine happiness.Make Space for Joy at www.evergreenacacia.comand follow her on Linked In at https://www.linkedin.com/in/eastreett/
We are glad to welcome international tax expert for this episode. Alex has a great deal of expertise to share with us in the diplo community. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/talking-expat-taxes/id1753694329 Find Alex here: https://mcgowintax.com/ Learn how to fill out international forms here: https://www.youtube.com/@McGowinTax
Welcome to an episode that's a bit different. Today, there are four of us talking and sharing experiences from the perspective of Foreign Service life – mainly as spouses and one contractor. If you happened to listen to episode 162 which was about fitness, you may recognize these amazing women – Hillery Midkiff, Susie Csorsz Brown, and Morgan Loosli. The four of us all met while living and working Sri Lanka, starting back in 2020. At this point, I am now living in the US, Hillery and Susie are still in Colombo, Sri Lanka, and Morgan and her family are living in Shanghai.We recorded this conversation in the spring of 2024, and it got lost in my folders, so hence the delay in publication. As I listened to it recently, I appreciated the stories and decided it needed to be released into the wild!IF you are not connected with the Foreign Service, a warning that there are a number of acronyms that you will hear and likely not understand. The most frequent one is probably EFM which stands for Eligible Family Member – the term given to spouses and children who are considered dependents of Foreign Service Officers. Susie, Morgan, and I are in the role of EFMs. Hillery is a contracted officer and her husband is an EFM. Other than that, I think you'll be able to follow just fine despite the other acronyms.We are talking about careers, finding professional fulfillment, and unique challenges that are associated with living and moving internationally. Sometimes in countries where we have permission to work in the local economy, and sometimes in countries where we do not have permission to work locally. A certain number of jobs exist at our US Embassies and Consulates that are specific for EFM employment – Susie and Morgan will share about some of their experiences in those positions. I have chosen to develop my own business and have also worked on a part-time basis as a trainer for the Foreign Service Institute, the training center for the US Department of State. Susie, Morgan, Hillery – thank you for this conversation. Thanks for sharing the ups and downs and realities of this interesting life we live. I'm super grateful for your friendships and how we stay connected across the globe! (And quick note that Hillery does indeed drop the F bomb at one point in our conversation, so it's marked explicit. She'll appreciate the shoutout for that. You are welcome, Hillery!!)And with that, let me turn this over to our conversation that is graciously hosted by Susie.Make Life Less Difficult
Should I accept an overseas post with my current medical condition? What are my options? This is the episode on Med Services you ALL want to hear. Let's talk about specifics on general medical clearances and mental health. Join us to consider your own choice in how to connect your medical needs to the work/location you are considering. Expert insights from: Director Jen Monna--Health Unit experienced current director Kip Quenin- Psychaitrist, Mental Health professional MED Sharepoint homepage: https://usdos.sharepoint.com/sites/MED/SitePages/Public/Main Med survey www.bit.ly/MEDFeedbackSurvey MED Internet Site: https://www.state.gov/bureaus-offices/under-secretary-for-management/bureau-of-medical-services/ Child and Family Programs, for SNEA inquiries: MEDCFP@state.gov To connect with Susie directly check out: www.healthyexpatparent.com
After rave reviews of his debut novel, EFM Matthew Becker has two more books coming soon. In this episode, find out how an academic mathematician with a past work in missile tracking and COVID test kit distribution analysis became an EFM and followed a secret dream to become an author. Like most avid readers, Matthew believed he could write something pretty decent. Unlike the rest of us, he actually followed through on that, writing several novels before getting his first contract and agent. Matthew explains how advanced math education taught him critical thinking skills rather than just specific techniques, and how he uses those to outline and organize plots, track manuscript submissions and record his late night and midday inspirations. In his debut novel, the wife of a congressional staffer goes missing amidst a mass shooting, Run, both a stand alone and part of a trilogy, is the story of someone much like all EFMs, an everyday hero in extraordinary circumstances. His second book, Don't Look Down, is available for pre-order now.------Matthew Becker is a thriller author, with his debut novel RUN described as "a must read" and "wicked smart and exceptionally fun." He is a former mathematician, and worked as part of the national Covid-19 response. He has a doctorate in applied mathematics from the University of Maryland, College Park, and is published in the Bulletin of Mathematical Biology.Matthew currently lives with his wife and their two children in Washington, DC, in between overseas assignments. An avid thriller reader, he loves stories with dense, twisted plots and emotional gravitas.Website: www.matthewbeckerbooks.comInstagram: @matthewbeckerbooksReviews and more on Goodreads
Does living in different places shape or shift your perspective on political leanings? Join us to talk about what we've noticed. In this talk, Jenni and Angi are considerate of varied opinions across the board. This discussion aims to be inclusive for all, while we all decide our politics as individuals. Especially how this works within families and third culture kids. To work with Jenni directly check out: www.theexpatmom.com To work with Angi directly (parents and teens) connect at: www.teenlines.com
Laura Jennings has navigated her share of twists, turns, and transitions, from starting her career in publishing to successful stints in marketing and communications. She's a passionate and accomplished business developer, having built a portable Pilates business and taken it to five posts. Now as Chief Strategy Officer at LVL-Up Strategies, she continues to advocate for EFM career progression as co-founder of a business staffed entirely by partners of the US Foreign Service.In this interview, we learn that Paris isn't hard, but walking away from a career certainly is. We also discuss the mental component of identity and why Laura believes an important aspect of self-care involves embracing our potential to contribute to society. Listen in to learn more! .BIOLaura Jennings enjoys bringing folks with aligned objectives together and empowering all parties to achieve their vision. Her ability to guide clients and her team toward their purpose or vision while recognizing their own particular ecosystems creates a culture of trust and lasting relationships primed for growth. Laura's 20+ years in communications, strategic partnerships, project management, and planning combined with 7+ years launching and building her own business, both nationally and internationally, led her to her purpose—connecting others and lifting them to their next level.As part of a Foreign Service family, having a career in the traditional sense was not an option. Laura continued to maintain relevance whether as an entrepreneur, working in government, or serving the diplomat community and host country through programs that give back. Her ability to quickly evaluate situations, develop strategies, and implement initiatives with a positive impact ensured her success from country to country.Laura has lived in five countries and has a working knowledge of four languages. She received her Bachelor's degree in Language, Writing, and Rhetoric from the University of Maryland, College Park. She recently served on the Move2Learn Board of Directors and loves spending time with her husband and two girls as they adventure through this amazing life.https://www.lvlupstrategies.com/team-members/laura-jennings
In this Filmmaking Stuff Podcast episode, host Tom Malloy shares three common mistakes filmmakers make when shooting their movies or attending film markets like AFM, Cannes, or EFM. Learn how to balance excitement, avoid over-promising or under-delivering, and maintain discipline to prevent burnout. Whether you're raising money on set or pitching at a film market, these practical tips will help you navigate the process smoothly. Tune in for actionable insights to help you create your best film! Subscribe for more filmmaking tips and success strategies.
When there's an EFM who has turned what seems to be a location-dependent career into something globally portable, you know you'll eventually meet them here on Available Worldwide. In this episode, Amy shares what it was like to unexpectedly dine with some global power-players, how she made the tough decision to quit a portable job without the guarantee of something new, and what things are really like in the sub-basements of some of America's iconic buildings. Talking with her felt like listening to an old movie trailer, "You'll laugh, you'll cry, but you'll never regret...." -----Amy Parker is passionate about the power of philanthropy to serve the public good and improve people's lives.A strategic leader with more than twenty years of director-level fundraising experience, Amy has worked for iconic institutions including the Wikimedia Foundation, Smithsonian Institution, The New York Public Library, and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. In her time as a fundraising consultant, she's provided services to clients and spoken at conferences across four continents.Some of Amy's career highlights have been raising funds for projects such as the official portraits of Barack and Michelle Obama for the National Portrait Gallery, renovation of the historic façade of the New York Public Library's flagship building at Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street, and the launch of an endowment fund that supports Wikipedia, the world's largest compilation of human knowledge.Amy has been part of several record-setting fundraising campaigns, including the Smithsonian's first-ever comprehensive campaign, which raised over $1.8 billion, and the $2 billion Carolina First Campaign, which was one of the 5 largest campaigns in US higher education at the time. She is a member of the Association of Fundraising Professionals and has held the Certified Fund Raising Executive (CFRE) credential since 2009.
Rachel is a professor, an author, and a VBAC mom who is here to share her story from a traumatic C-section birth through a VBAC. This episode really dives deep into how picking the right provider is key to improving your chances for a VBAC. They give practical questions to ask your providers, more than just yes or no, to really get to know their birth philosophy and what qualifications and experiences your provider might have that would make them a better fit for VBAC chances. Rachel and Meagan also give a lot of validation and advice on how to start the process of overcoming birth trauma; it's reality and to not be ashamed of it. You're not alone. Through the many important messages of this episode, they both mention many times to trust your intuition. If something feels off, listen to that. And if a change in provider is necessary…it is never ever too late to change. Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of the Cesarean SectionHow to Naturally Induce LaborHow to Turn Prodromal Labor into Active LaborMembrane Sweeps for VBACHow to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for ParentsFull Transcript under Episode Details Meagan: Hello everybody! Welcome to the show! I am so honored to have Rachel Somerstein on with us today. She is a friend of ours from New York. She is a writer and an associate professor of journalism at SUNY New Paltz. She is an author of Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of the Cesarean Section. And her writing has also appeared in the Boston Globe, The Guardian, The Washington Post, and Women's Health. She lives in Hudson Valley, NY with her husband and her two children and is here to share her stories with you today. Rachel had an unplanned Xesarean section with her first child and the experience was anything but routine. I know that there are many of us who have been through this journey and on this podcast, maybe listening today, that also had an unexpected experience and it may have left us with trauma, or doubt, or fear, or all the feelings, right? And so she is going to be talking to us today about her experiences, but then also we're going to talk about some guidance on how to find peace and to offer ourselves grace and to set ourselves up for a much better experience next time. We do have a review of the week, so I want to get into that and I'm going to turn the time over to Rachel.This review is by Deserie Jacobsen. The review title is “Thank You.” She actually emailed this in and it says, “This podcast and parents course is amazing. I am not a VBAC mom, but I have been listening since 2020. I binge listen near the end of every pregnancy to remind me of everything I need to remember in birth and process through my previous births. This time around I felt more prepared than ever before, having plans in place just in case. We were able to have a quick birth of my 5th baby. I love the education, passion, and love this podcast gives. I recommend it to everyone I know, and I have learned so much from it. I am so grateful for this podcast, thank you.”Thank you so much Deserie for your review! Seriously you guys, I just love hearing that people are finding the information that they need, they're finding community, they're finding that they can do this too. Just like them, and all these reviewers and all the people that have shared their stories and all these reviewers you guys can too. This birth, VBAC, is possible too. Better experience is possible. A healing CBAC; it's possible. You guys, all it takes is getting the information, the prep, finding the provider, to have a better experience.Meagan: Alright Ms. Rachel, welcome to the show and thank you again so much for being here with us. I kind of talked about this a little bit before we started recording about how I think your episode is going to be so powerful and deep and raw too. You've got these feelings and these words. I love it. I love reading your book and I can't wait to hear it from your own mouth. Which speaking of book, can we talk about that a little bit? What kind of just inspired you, jumpstarted you into writing a book about this?Rachel: Well, I'm a writer. And I wrote an essay about my birth about two years after I had my baby, my first birth, my C-section. And I realized I had a lot more to say and also I heard from a lot of moms when that came out and that made me start thinking that I think there was a bigger project. Meagan: Absolutely. And an amazing project that you completed.Rachel: Yes.Meagan: And remind everybody before we get into your stories where they can find your book. I actually have it here in my hands. It's Invisible Labor. So where all can they find that? And we'll make sure that we link it. Rachel: Sure, thank you! Yeah, so it's Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of The Cesarean Section. And you can get it on Amazon, you can get it from Barnes and Noble, you can get it from your local bookstore, you can get it as an audiobook? Or you can also get it as an ebook.Meagan: For the audiobook, did you record it?Rachel: I did not. The narrator is Xe Sands and she did a great, great job. It sounds excellent. Meagan: Awesome. We'll be sure to link that. I think it's definitely a book that everyone should check out. There's a lot of power in that book.Rachel: Thank you.Meagan: And it's not even just your story. I mean there's a ton. Like if you go through the note section there's a ton of research in there, and history and studies, and so many really great things. Well okay, let's hear about the story that started the inspiration and behind this amazing book.Rachel: Sure! Thank you. So like so many moms, I had an unplanned C-section that I was completely unprepared for, which is another reason I wanted to write this book because I think a lot of people go into pregnancy just assuming they're going to have a vaginal birth and like me, I didn't even read the parts of the books about C-sections, I skipped them. Because I was not going to have a C-section. Which is whatever, hindsight is everything, right? But I had a totally textbook pregnancy. I switched to a different group of midwives and OB's about halfway through because I just didn't have a connection I felt with the providers in the first one. And frankly, I didn't have a connection with the providers in the second one either, but by that point, I was like well whatever, it's fine. Which I think is actually, if I could go back and do it again I would have changed that. But you kind of are like, I don't want to, could I possibly change again? And I think that for people who are VBACing, yes you can and sometimes you actually really need to, even like late on in your pregnancy, people will switch groups or providers even late in the third trimester, so. Meagan: Even if you're changed already, you can do it multiple times.Rachel: Exactly.Meagan: It's not a bad thing to find the right provider for you. It's not. Rachel: It's not. And It's hard. And you can feel like, Oh my god. Am I really going to send all my records over? It can feel like so much effort and it can really be worth it. I just wanted to say that as someone who switched once and then was like, Okay, I'm done, and wished I'd switched again. So anyways, it was late in week 39 I went into prodromal labor but I didn't know that prodromal labor even existed because nobody told me about it. And it was my first baby. So I was like is this labor? I think I'm having contractions, these are not Braxton Hicks. And in the end, we talked to the doula I was working with, and in the end they ended up petering out. And at that, I think that that for me marked the beginning of, this is not going to look like the way I had expected it to look. And again, hindsight is everything. What I wish I had known at the time– and I think this is really relevant to some VBAC moms is that sometimes prodromal labor means that your baby is not in the best position for having a vaginal birth. And I can't exactly say oh I would have done this or that differently if I'd known it, but it would have helped me understand what I was going into with the labor and the birth. So anyway, I eventually went into labor in the middle of the night. It was exactly my due date and I knew it was different. I could just feel this is labor. And I was really eager to get it going quickly. And again, I wish someone would have said, “Rachel, rest. It's early. You're going to need your strength. You're going to need your energy however your baby is born.” And instead I quite literally was running up and down the stairs of my house to try to push labor along. Which is, I have compassion for myself, I understand why I was doing that. What I really needed to do was get in the bath, or I don't know, lay over the birth ball. Watch a silly movie, right? The feelings I was having were real pain and I was scared. But you kind of can't run through this, especially a first labor as we all know, those take a long time, right?Meagan: Yeah. And if we were having prodromal labor, our body may be kicking into labor, but still might need some time to help that baby rotate and change positions. Rachel: Exactly, exactly. And this is the kind of education that is so missing from birth classes. And that is one reason why this kind of podcast is so helpful because that's how I learned about these different things. I didn't ever learn about them from a provider being like, “Let's talk about what will happen in your birth, and let's talk about why you had prodromal labor.”So anyway, we went to the doctors office where we met a midwife and my doula for a labor check. And I was hardly dilated, I was at a 2 but I was in extreme pain. And I have to say, I have a very, very high pain tolerance and I now know I was having back labor. Meagan: Baby's position.Rachel: Exactly. And the contractions were like boom boom boom boom. They were not, I didn't have any rest in between them. Which again, I think my baby was like I gotta get in the right position, this isn't working out, I'm freaking out, ah! Plus my mom is running around, ah! Right?Meagan: Yeah. Rachel: So we went to the hospital and I was checked in and the midwife who checked me in was like, “Oh you're actually not even 2 centimeters, you're just 1 centimeter dilated.” And they checked me because I was in so much pain I think. And I don't know that that was necessarily wrong, but again, no one was sort of explaining, “Here's what we think is going on.” And it's partly because I believe those providers thought I was exaggerating what I was experiencing physically. They didn't know me. Well, they didn't know that I'm usually pretty stoic. They didn't know that I'm not a squeaky wheel. And I wasn't like screaming or crying or pounding. I was like quiet and I was like I'm in a lot of pain.Meagan: An intense quiet.Rachel: Intense quiet. Exactly. But that doesn't look like what we think pain looks like to people. And the fact is that people are very individual and how they express pain especially during labor where you're already kind of like leaving the regular plane of reality.Meagan: Yes. Rachel: So an important takeaway is like, even experienced providers cannot read your mind and make mistakes in assessing what's truly going on with you. And this comes up later in my second birth, but my husband now does a much better job of saying, “You might look at Rachel right now and think she looks like she's doing great, but this is what's really going on with her.” And he does that in a way that's not like he's speaking for me in a way that's annoying, but it's like I actually can't advocate for myself, I can't express this. So anyways, I asked for an epidural. They said that the anesthesiologist was busy. Which may have been true, but may have been they were trying to put me off because I was hardly dilated. And they told me to get in the birth tub. And I remember hanging over the side of the tub and staring at the clock on the wall and being like, I actually don't know if I'm going to survive this hour. I was just in so much pain. Incredible pain from back labor that was incessant. Eventually he showed up. They hooked me up to all the monitors. At that point, one of the nurses was like, “Oh, you are having monster contractions.” Like the contractions that were being measured were so intense they were going each time to the edge of what was measurable. And now that the computer said it it was like oh…Meagan: You're validated now. Rachel: Exactly. Right. And the anesthesiologist, it took him three tries to get the epidural working properly which would echo problems to come. But he did, and it took away the pain. And then I was just in the bed and kind of left there. And the nurses and the midwife did not use a peanut ball, they didn't move me around. And obviously, listen, I'm attached to the monitors. You know you cannot really move that well, the belt slips, and that increases the chances you'll have a C-section. And there are still things that can be done. It's not like you're a loaf of bread, you just lay in a bed. But they didn't do that stuff and I wasn't dilating. The nurse and doula eventually basically were like, “Well, we're going to go out for dinner and we'll be back in a few hours and we're going to give you this thing to sleep and if you haven't dilated by the time we get back you're going to have a C-section.” And at that point I was exhausted. It's evening now, I've been up since the middle of the night. I'm totally like, what is happening with this birth? No preparation; I took birth classes, I read books, no preparation suggested that this series of events could take place. I felt completely abandoned by my providers, including my doula who I was paying out of pocket. And one thing that came up at this time also was I had this colposcopy in college, like scraping of cervical cells. I didn't hide it from anybody, I was open. And the midwife said well maybe that's why you're not dilating is because of this colposcopy.Meagan: Do you think you got scar tissue?Rachel: That's what she said. And I remember at the time being like why are we only talking about this now? Why has nobody brought this up in any of the prenatal visits that I've done? And I felt blamed. This thing about your body is defective. After a few hours when the midwife and the doula came back and I rested and it was quiet, I had dilated to a 9. And I think what that's about is that I had been in too much pain to dilate. I was so frozen up and tense and also extremely scared.At this point people are like, “Oh wow.” And finally my water broke,y water hadn't broken. So you know, things are kind of continuing and I am starting to actually feel even more fear and my room is getting really crowded with people. And the midwife asks me to start pushing. And I was afraid and I was excited. They turned on the baby warmer, and they were like, “Okay, your baby is going to come out.” And I started to push but I couldn't feel what I was doing. I had no idea. And the midwife was like, “Do you have an urge to push?” And I was like, “No.” The epidural that hadn't gone well from the beginning had then come down with a very heavy hammer and I felt total numbness. It was not helpful. I needed someone to have turned it off or something, or turned it down so I could feel an urge to push and feel how to push, where to push, what muscles to use. And at a certain point I could tell something was going not right and it turned out that my baby was having heart rate decelerations. So just to sketch the scene. At this point it's 1 o'clock in the morning, I've been awake for 24 hours. I'm exhausted. My husband is exhausted. Neither of us has any idea that things could have gone like this. The midwife says I think it's time to do a C-section. And I don't disagree with her. I don't even know what to think at that point. I'm also feeling tremendous fear. I was like I'm afraid I'm going to die, I'm afraid my baby's going to die. And the overall sense in the room…and people were like, “Oh no, you're going to be fine”. And the sense in the room was that I was hysterical and I was not in my right mind. Which I wasn't in my right mind; I had been awake for a long time, I'd been trying to have this baby, nobody really told me what was going on and I felt totally unsupported. Actually, my response was completely reasonable given the circumstances and nobody really attended to that and saw that and recognized that as completely valid. Plus, I don't have evidence to stack this up absolutely, but I have since come to find out that there is a medication that some laboring women are given to help them rest and one of the side effects is an impending sense of doom. And I have a friend who had a baby at this same hospital and had the same response after having been given something to rest during her labor. I could go back and look at my records and I may do that but I'm like, well that would explain also why I had the response I did. Meagan: Mhmm.Rachel: Anyway, we go to the OR. I hunch my back for the spinal that the anesthesiologist has to do a couple of times to get it right. I'm still contracting at this point. My body is still like, Come on, let's get this baby out. Let's get this baby out. And I'm so uncomfortable. And you know that advice to not lay down flat on your back when you're pregnant, but that's what you have to do when you're in the OR. The whole thing felt like I was going to choke under my stomach and very exposed like you are in the operating room. Meagan: Yeah, it's cold and it's bright and you're very exposed. And you can't move your body normally, especially if you've had a spinal. Rachel: And also in retrospect, again I'm like I cannot believe that the first time I learned what happened in a C-section was in my C-section. I really should have at least learned about this even though it would have still been scary and I still would have been surprised. So when the OB goes to operate, he starts his incision and I say, “I felt that.” And he says, “You'll feel pressure.” And I say, “I felt that.” And he continues operating and I was not numb. I felt the operation. And according to his notes..parts of this I don't remember…but he wrote it down and my husband has also told me that I was screaming, my legs were kicking. There's no question that I was in tremendous pain. And I was moaning and it was horrible. And it was horrible for the people in the room too by the way.Meagan: I'm sure. Rachel: Right? Like it's really important to say that. My OB didn't listen to me. That is a super common thing that happens in healthcare, especially for women. Especially for pregnant women. He's not a sociopath. He didn't want to be evil, but he didn't listen and the consequences were so steep and so dire. And I think that it was traumatizing to him and I know it was traumatizing to some of the other providers in that room, the nurses to watch this. He kept going and when the baby was born, which I don't remember, apparently they held her up to my face and they put me under general anesthesia and sent my baby and my husband away and stitched me up. Then I woke up in recovery. The doula and the midwife had gotten the baby to latch while I was unconscious and were talking about me without knowing that I was awake about her latch which really, really bothered me because it just underscored how it felt like I was just a body. And even people who were supposed to be there to take care of me and be tender and advocates, I felt they disregarded me. And under other circumstances I really would have wanted to breastfeed my baby like right away. But I wasn't even there to say yes I want to do this or no I don't want to do this. It was a terrible birth and I would not wish it on anybody. Meagan: And I think, kind of talking about what you were just talking about with breastfeeding and stuff, these people in their hearts and in their minds were probably like this is what she would have wanted. We're trying to help. But in whole other frame of mind over here, I'm not present. I haven't said those things. And I know you're trying to help and I know that's where your heart is, but I'm not okay with this. Rachel: Totally.Meagan: And I think sometimes as doulas, as birth workers, as any one of you listening, remember that words matter. Actions matter. These moms' feelings matter and it's sometimes in our minds we're trying to do what's best, but it might not be. Rachel: Totally. Absolutely. Yes and I again, it's so important to point out. Yes they were coming from a good place. They really were coming from a good place. But it wasn't the way that I felt it or experienced it. Meagan: And it left you with trauma and angst and heartache. Rachel: Absolutely. Totally. Yeah. Meagan: Well that definitely sounds like a really rough birth. And it's so crazy because it's like you went from not progressing to baby in a poor position, to getting an epidural. I love that you talked about that. That can be an amazing tool. A lot of people are very against epidurals, and there are pros and cons with epidurals. We've talked about those. Fetal heart decels is one of them. I don't think, maybe in this situation it sounds like a lot of other things happened; baby's position being one of the biggest ones. But that can really be a tool that helps you just relax and be more present and have less trauma. We talk about this in my doula practice of where there's a difference between pain and suffering. And pain, progressive positive pain that's bringing our baby to us that's one thing. But when we're suffering and we're so tense that our body's not even able to try; that epidural could come into great play. But again, we're not that loaf of bread in a bed and it is important to move and rotate. And it doesn't have to be drastic. It doesn't have to be crazy big movements. Just subtle movements to change the dynamics of the pelvis and to encourage our baby to keep coming down. So there were so many things that just went poorly but also went well, and then poorly again and then well and then real poorly there at the end. Rachel: And I think like to your point, I went into my birth I should say, I was planning on having an unmedicated vaginal birth. I was like I'm not going to have an epidural. And I think that if my providers had different skills I would have, I may have been able to have that baby vaginally. And I say that based on what happened in my second birth. So it's not just like wishful thinking, right? And I'm really glad I had that epidural. I really needed that. I was suffering. The pain I was experiencing was not productive pain. And an epidural can help you with suffering, alleviate your suffering. But it can't and doesn't substitute for emotional support. And I think that's what was missing for me, throughout that first birth. Even if I had gone on to have ok fine, a cesarean, or even a vaginal birth, I still think I would have been like that wasn't a good birth because I didn't feel emotionally supported. And an epidural can't do that. Meagan: Yeah. No an epidural cannot do that. And I, for anyone listening who supports birth, or even who are going for a birth you kind of mentioned it. You're in this other land and sometimes it's hard to advocate and open. You might be thinking something and you might so badly want to say it. It's right here, coming out. And you can't say it for whatever reason. It's a weird thing, it doesn't make sense sometimes but it can happen. But really being heard, validated, understood; which are so many things you weren't. Right? And when we're not heard and when we don't feel safe, and we don't feel supported, those things leave us with PTSD. In fact there was, in your book, I'm just going to read it. It says, “2022 study by anesthesiology and obstetrics professor Joanna and colleagues found that what's important about women who feel pain during childbirth is how mothers feel about their pain. And how their providers communicate with them overall…”You were communicating, and no one was communicating to you. “...feeling positively about pain and heard by providers protects a mother from developing PTSD.” And I mean it goes on which is why you need to get the book so you can read more about it. Rachel: Yep. Meagan: But really, feeling heard. Rachel: It's not just crunchy whoo-hoo feels good, feels right, sounds good. It really matters. And I have to say that I'm participating in and helping to work with providers on designing some studies about providing different pain options for moms during C-sections. We literally had a conversation about this yesterday. And one of things we were talking about is it's not just the pain. It's not just pain relief. It's also being listened to. Because there will be people who are like, I might say I'm in pain, but that doesn't mean I need an epidural or want an epidural. But I'm feeling pain and I want to be heard and I want somebody to…even if you can't express this. You can't even express it because you're the one having labor. What you're needing is someone to see you and look you in the eye and be like you're going to be okay. And I think as mothers we totally are experienced with that all the time. When your child is hurt or sick, part of your job obviously is to get them the help they need, but it's also to assure them this nosebleed is going to end. You're not going to have a bloody nose for the rest of your life. Which, when you're going through something really hard you can sometimes forget, right? And you're pointing out from the studies this helps to prevent people in birth, in labor, from developing PTSD. The stakes are really high. They matter so much. Meagan: When you were just talking, I don't know if you saw my eyes kind of well up a little, but I connected a lot with my first birth when I was clinging to a bed, literally clinging. And I was looking at my husband and I'm like, “Do something!” I had a baby in a poor position. I was being jacked full of pitocin. My water had broken, there was a lot of discomfort going on. I had told him I didn't want an epidural and he's like what do you want me to do? And I was like I don't know, I just need something! And I was terrified and desperate. And he was just like… It wasn't fair for me to put him in that position either but at the same time he was like I don't know, I don't know what to do, right? And the nurses were just like we'll just get you an epidural. And I was like no, I don't want an epidural. And then it just was like epidural, just went down from there. And I wish so badly that there was something else. Let's get you out of the bed. Let's get you in the shower. Let's give you some nitrous. There was so much more that I could have had, but wasn't even offered. And I think too, I needed someone to tell me that nosebleed was going to end. Rachel: Yes. Meagan: And it was going to end and it was going to come back every five minutes and it was going to end again and I was going to be okay. And I was going to survive that. And just hearing you talk about that, why my eyes got all welly, is that I don't know if I realized how much that impacted me until just barely. And here I am, my daughter is almost 13.Rachel: Just like how powerful these things that, I don't know, this is part of why we have these conversations. They shed different corners of light on our experiences that it's like oh my gosh, I didn't even know I knew that. And that's so why we, even though I'm not postpartum immediately, it's valuable for me to talk about it too; to hear what you're saying, you know?Meagan: Yeah. Ah, so after a not-so-amazing experience, going into that postpartum, you've talked a little bit about that in your book. Well, not a little bit, you've talked about that a lot. Tell us about that journey and then what led you to deciding on VBAC and ultimately going and having a VBAC. Rachel: So I should say, I was really…Talk about not realizing things right away. It took me a long time to figure out how traumatized I had been by that birth. And I was about two years postpartum and I was having a procedure for something else and I just completely, I had a panic attack. I had never had a panic attack before, I didn't know what it was and couldn't have explained what was happening. And when the anesthesiologist who did this procedure was like have you ever had any issues with anesthesia, which is exactly the question that should be asked, and I had said what had happened he was so taken aback. He was shocked and didn't know what to say and walked out of the room.Not in the way of, I'm abandoning my patient, but just like from his perspective here's this kind of routine thing. This patient is crying and shaking and talking about this very traumatic incident which I had not talked about. I didn't go to therapy. I had talked about it with friends and my family, it wasn't a secret, but I felt a lot of shame. I felt like I must have been this total freak of a person that this had happened to me. And after that I remember saying to my husband, I just don't know if I'm ever going to be able to get over this trauma enough to have another baby. And I didn't even know if I wanted another baby, like separate from the trauma. In therapy I started to see that I felt very stuck in my life and that included how and whether to grow my family. And that was actually because of the traumatic birth. It just like made this big block. I think one thing that's important to think about for those who have had a traumatic birth is that sometimes that can show up in your life in ways that you don't expect. Meagan: Yes. Rachel: And so to be compassionate with yourself about that and also to be open to that. We're in the era of warnings and trigger warnings and those are important, but sometimes for a traumatized person the things that are triggering or activating are not what you would think. Like for me, I couldn't watch a scene of a hospital birth even if it was happy without getting very uncomfortable and having to walk away and there wouldn't be a content warning on that. So it's just to say be patient with yourself. Accept that…don't, I guess if you've had a traumatizing birth you don't have to struggle against these things. As horrible as they might feel, as uncomfortable as they might feel it's normal and it's ok and it shows up differently for everybody. Rachel: Yeah so I had this big question and then I was like ok, it took awhile for me to be like I do want to have another baby. But I wasn't ready emotionally. And so I waited. And then about, let's see, October of 2019, I was like I think that I'm ready to try to have another baby. And we had met this midwife who lived in our community, who my daughter actually made friends with her niece at our public pool which is so beautiful. I ran into her one night while she was walking her dog. She was like your husband shared a little bit with me, if you ever want to talk. And this, I feel like, I could not be more grateful that this person came into my life. She just is, her skills are phenomenal. Just as a clinician in terms of trauma-informed care, and I've felt safe enough going to her for prenatal care to decide that I was ready to get pregnant. My joke is that I should tour high schools and be like it only takes once to have unprotected sex to become a parent. And I was really lucky that I got pregnant right away and at that point I was 37. So I should say I had my first baby at 33 and I got pregnant again at 37. And that's not always the case for people. Obviously it can take a long time and especially after a C-section, secondary infertility is real. Meagan: It is. Rachel: Yeah. Not talked about enough. Really not talked about enough. Meagan: There's a lot of things, right, about C-sections that is not discussed about. For personal, for the mom, for the individual, the infertility, adhesions, all those things. Just the emotional and the physical. Then even the baby. There's risks for the baby, the allergies, the microbiome getting messed up. All the risks, it's just not discussed. Rachel: No, it's really not. And you kind of only find out later if you've had a C-section and you've had a problem down the road that you're like, maybe that's because of my C-section. It's ridiculous.So we got pregnant and I was not sure if I wanted to have a VBAC, but I started thinking about it from the beginning. And I also was like, if I don't have a VBAC how am I ever going to get myself into an OR, I just don't know. And I really think that VBAC is the under-discussed pain point for moms. And I'm preaching to the choir here but we're talking about half a million moms every year have to make this decision, if it's even available to them. Meagan: I was going to say, if it's even offered. Rachel: If it's even offered. Which is totally not a given. But theoretically, they do have this decision and I really have not…I should say, in the course of writing this book, but also just being a mom who had a bad C-section and then had a VBAC, I hear from people a lot about their journeys just like on the playground. Every person I've talked to, they agonize over it. No matter what they choose, no matter what. Why is that not talked about more? I mean that part of what this podcast is doing that's so important, but I still can't believe how under the radar it is, yet it's such a big deal when you're going through it. So anyway, I told myself I did not have to decide right away about a VBAC or a C-section. My midwife was like you can totally have a VBAC, you can totally have a C-section. Even if you have a C-section you can keep seeing me. I was worried like oh would I get bumped out of midwifery care. One of the things I'm really fortunate about and that I think is really good about that practice is that she has a very close relationship with one of the OB's there. Like they kind of share patients, I should say that. And that's because she's worked with him for a long time and he really respects her clinical skills and vice versa. The other thing about her that's unique and that I didn't know how important it is she's a Certified Nurse Midwife, so she attends births in the hospital. But she previously had been a homebirth practice and at a birth center as a CNM. So her skills are, like I said are phenomenal. A C-section is truly like we have to do this. I've run out of my bag of skills or like the baby or mom's health suggests that like we need to do this now. She worked with me to work with the scheduler so that I saw her for every visit which helped me to learn how to trust her and she didn't pressure me. Either way she was completely open. She also worked with me to make sure that I could see her for virtually every visit so that way she earned my trust. And I got to show her who I am. She got to understand me which was really important to the birth. Meagan: Yes, which I want to point out. There are a lot of providers these days that are working in groups. And I understand why they're working in groups. They're overworked, definitely not rested. There's reasons why, both midwives and OBGYNs are working in these big practices. But the thing is it's really nice to have that established relationship but for some reason specially for VBAC it's so important to have that one-on-one relationship. So if you can, during your search for finding providers, if you can find a provider that is going to be like Rachel's midwife where she's just like I want to get to know you, I want to establish this relationship. Yes, we have this OB over here but I want to be your person. I definitely think it's impactful.Rachel: I totally agree with you and I didn't even know that was possible. And she works for a big group and even so she told the schedulers, hey make sure you schedule her with me. She didn't just do that with me by the way, it wasn't just a special favor for this traumatized patient. And frankly it's better for the providers too because they're not coming in cold. Like ok who's this person, and she's saying this. And what's her prenatal care like? What's her pregnancy like? Of course they're looking at the notes, but it's not the same. Meagan: It isn't. And I love that she said that. But I also want to point out that you can request that. If you're in a group and you can connect whole-heartedly with someone and you feel it's definitely who you need, it's ok to ask hey. I know that I am supposed to meet Sarah Jane and Sally, but can I stay with whoever. And maybe you might not get every visit, but if you can get more visits than only that one? It's worth asking. Rachel: Totally. And also then you know their style. So like she was not an alarmist. Let's say I was over 35; I had to see a MFM just because of my age. That went fine, but if something had come up, like let's say I had a short cervix or there was something I found in an appointment with an MFM specialist I would know her well enough to take that to her to be like, put it to me straight. How worried should I be about this? As opposed to maybe this one's an alarmist, this one is more like ahh let me put this in…And the only way you're going to learn about that is from meeting with them again and again. And for VBAC that's so so important. Meagan: It is. It kind of reminds me of dating. It's weird. I had said this with my provider when I didn't switch. I was like, I feel like I'm breaking up with him. Like he's my second boyfriend, it's just weird. It's not really boyfriend but you know what I mean. But it is, we're dating them. And anyone, in my opinion, can come off really great for that first date because they're wanting to make that impression. They're wanting you to like them. But the more you get to know them, the more they may show their true colors. And you also may realize, I don't think I'm the right person for you. My desires aren't something that aligns with you and so I don't want to put you in this situation. And so if we date our providers, “date our providers,” a little bit more than just one time it really will help us know. And like you said, if something were to come up you could have that trusted person in your corner, which is so important for VBAC, that you can go to. Rachel: Totally. Yeah. So yeah, so pregnancy went well. And then right as I entered my third trimester it started to be COVID. Meagan: Mhmmm. The joys. Rachel: Nobody saw that coming. And then you know, things for the entire society obviously went completely off the rails. Obviously something like COVID is, we hope, not even once in a generation. Once in a hundred years experience. But given all the stuff that was up in the air, boy was I glad that there was one provider who I trusted. Who I could be like ok what do I do, what do I do. And I have to tell you that she and my daughter's pediatrician…I'm a professor. So I should say I'm in the classroom with young people who, you get sick a lot anyways. They're living in dorms, like they're not taking the best care of themselves. So COVID was circulating, and we live right outside New York City, COVID was circulating early here and I have a lot of colleagues that ended up getting it. And both my midwife and my child's pediatrician told me early you need to stop going in person, it's too dangerous for you. And I trust my daughter's pediatrician a lot, you know we have a nice relationship and I really trusted my midwife. Right? So I followed that advice and was really fortunate because boy. You know what you don't want while pregnant? COVID. And you know what you really didn't want? COVID in 2020 when you were pregnant and nobody knew anything, you know?Meagan: Right? Rachel: So, the blessing in disguise was that I was able to work from home. And it was super stressful because I had my daughter and my husband was here and you know, my husband is a photographer…I mean the funny thing is that I ended up, not my head but my body, being in these different photos he ended up taking and my belly was getting bigger and bigger and we kind of had to hide it. I'd be holding a book, or cleaning something. It was an absurd, crazy, isolating, scary, and also funny time. You know the blessing in disguise was that I wasn't on my feet as much and I think that that was really good for me as a pregnant person. There is also data that preterm birth went down during the lockdowns because people got to stay home and they don't necessarily get to do that leading up to birth, which tells us a lot about what we need and the rest we need and aren't getting. So anyway, at first everything went virtual and then when I started going in again for my appointments I had met the OB who works closely with my midwife. And we talked about what would happen if I went over 40 weeks. And he was like well, we're not going to automatically schedule a C-section, we would talk about potentially waiting or induction. And I really appreciated having that conversation with him because I understood where he was coming from and it wasn't again like we're going to schedule a C-section right now. So we know if you get to 40+3 and you haven't had the baby, bing bang boom. And that was very important information about his risk tolerance and his stance. Just like with my first birth I went into prodromal labor a few days before my due date. I had had a membrane sweep with my midwife. My in-laws came to stay with my daughter and we went to the hospital on a Saturday night. I didn't know this but my father-in-law told my husband I think she's getting ahead of her skis. And he was right in the end. So we get to the hospital and my contractions stop. And I'm like oh no. And my midwife was like, they put me on the monitor to get a strip which is like you know, what happens. Meagan: Normal.Rachel: And my midwife was like listen, your baby, he's not looking that good on the monitor. I want you to rest for a little bit and let's see. So I'll check back in with you in like half an hour. And I was so upset. I remember being like I can totally see where this is going to go and I had learned about VBAC in terms of like what could increase the chance of rupture or not and I was like I'm going to end up with another C-section and I'm going to be caught in the net. I didn't even have a shot, is what I felt. And then she came back half an hour later and she was like, “He looks great. I think he was just sleeping, and if you want to go home you can go home.” And it was like 1 o'clock in the morning. And I was like, “I think we should go home.” I just felt like he's not ready. He's not ready to be born. And remember, I trusted her so much. She would not tell me this if she thought that there was something…Meagan: If there was something wrong. Rachel: Exactly. She wasn't trying to be my friend. She was my provider. And so it felt really weird to leave and come home and not have a baby. And I thought was this the wrong thing to do, because I live like half an hour from the hospital, and was like no this is it.And then everything was quiet for a few days. And then just like my first labor, my daughter, I went into labor in the middle of the night and I had intense back labor, and I knew like this is the real deal, here we are. And this time I tried to rest. I did like cat/cow and just like anything, child's pose, just anything to feel more comfortable. And I called my midwife at 7 in the morning and she was like, “Okay, I want you to come in and be prepared to go into the hospital from this appointment.” So we did that and at that appointment, I had a headache, I had higher blood pressure, I was dilated to a 6, and she said to me, “Listen. Just so you know, they're not going to let you go home. You're going to the hospital, no matter what if your contractions stop or not whatever. This is what's happening because of how dilated you are, the fact that you have this headache, this BP readings, whatever.” And I was like that's completely reasonable, I felt that way too. You know what I mean? But I really appreciated she communicated that with me so clearly and explained why. So I planned initially to try to have an unmedicated, vaginal birth. My midwife and I had discussed these saline boluses you can have in your, by your, what's it called. Like the triangular bone in your back? I'm totally blanking. Meagan: Your sacrum?Rachel: The sacrum. Yeah, that that can alleviate some pain. And very quickly the pain was, I found it to be unbearable. And I asked for an epidural. And the anaesthesiologist came right away and did a very good job. And the nurses and the midwife who were at the hospital were using a peanut ball and helping me move and really supportive emotionally. And I was still really scared, right? Because I had had this terrible birth before, I thought something would happen to me. And nobody treated me like I was exaggerating or you know like, unreasonable. And that mattered a lot. And I think what's important is you shouldn't have to have gone through a bad birth for people then to take you at face value. With your first birth, it should be the standard for everybody. Meagan: Such a powerful saying right there. Rachel: And they were wonderful, truly, clinically and beside.Meagan: Good.Rachel: And then my midwife surprised me by showing up. She was not on call, she came in at like 9 o'clock, no she came in at like 5 o'clock, like once she'd seen her patients and I was just like oh my god, so moved to see her. And you know, I was pretty far along at that point and she kind of helped me get into different positions and then it was like okay, it was time to push. And they had managed that epidural so I could feel when it was time to push, and I could feel how she and the nurse were telling me to like push here, right? Like use this, make this go. The pain was really intense but it wasn't suffering, like okay, I'm getting instruction. And as I was pushing I could feel that it wasn't going to work. I was like he's not, his head…I could just feel it. Apparently he was kind of coming and kind of going back up, like his head forward and back. And my midwife was like do I have permission from you to try and move his head? I think his head is not in the best position. And I said yes, and she tried to do it and she couldn't. Her fingers weren't strong enough and then she went to the OB and she told me this later.She said to him can you come and move his head? He'd been trained by midwives in the military, by the way, which is one reason his clinical skills are so amazing.Meagan: That's awesome. Okay.Rachel: Awesome. And at first he apparently was like, oh she's a VBAC, like I can't believe you're asking me to do this. And my midwife, again they trust each other right, and she was like the baby's doing great and the mom's doing great. I really think this is going to work. And he was like okay. So he came in, asked my permission, I said yes and he moved my son's head. My water had not broken again, right? So it's like the same thing as the first one. And once he got in position and I started pushing my water broke in an explosion all over my midwife. That's why they wear goggles, now I know. And she went and changed her clothes. I pushed for 45 minutes and then he came out.Meagan: Oh my gosh. Rachel: It was amazing and I felt so proud and I was completely depleted. I was so high and also so low. And I think what's amazing to me is that it was almost the same labor as my daughter, which just tells me that's how my body tends to do.Meagan: Your pelvis. And some babies need to enter posterior or even in a weird position to actually get down. So that can happen. Rachel: Thank you. And also my water didn't break until the very end so there was buoyancy to be moved, right? And again who knows what would have happened if I had been with this provider the first time. Like maybe these decels really meant that my daughter had to come out like then. That is possible. And that first team did not have the skills of the second team. None of this was even brought up, wasn't even a possibility. And I should say that first birth, I didn't even mention this. The OB that gave me that C-section, later told me that my daughter's head was kind of cocked when he took her out. Which suggests that it was just like my son. And how I'm grateful for my epidural. I'm grateful for, you know, all the things that technological kept me safe, but it was these skills of facilitating vaginal birth that made the difference for me to have that VBAC. Meagan: Absolutely. And the hardest thing for me is seeing that these skills are being lost. Rachel: Yes.Meagan: Or maybe it's not that they're being lost, they're being ignored. And I don't know which one it is. I really don't know because I see people using them. So I feel like it's got to be there. But then I go to other births and I'm like, wait what? You're not going to do anything to help her right here? Or you know, it probably could have been a vaginal birth if we had a provider come in and be like we have a little asynclitic head, why don't we change into this position and let me see if I can just ever so slightly help this baby's head turn. It just isn't even offered. Rachel: Yes. Meagan: And that's something that I think needs to be added to questions for your provider. In the event that my baby is really low and coming vaginally, but is in a wonky position, what do you do to help my babys' position change to help me have a vaginal birth. And then even further what steps do you take past then if it doesn't work and my baby's so slow. Do we do assisted delivery? What do we do, let's have this conversation. So if it does come up, you're aware. Rachel: I love that. Meagan: I was going to say if your provider says, I don't know/I don't really help, then maybe that's not your right provider. Rachel: And I think what's so smart about that framing is that it's not putting the provider on the defensive of like, what's your training, right? Then it's like, what is your problem? But you're actually asking about their skills and you're asking about their approach, without coming from a place of seeming doubt. Just like, I'm just curious. Meagan: Yeah. Like what could I expect if this were to happen, especially if in the past. Say your C-section was failure to descend, mostly based off on position, we know that this is a big thing. But if your past cesarean was failure to descend, ask those questions to your provider. What steps can you take? What steps can we do together, you and I, to help this baby come out vaginally? Rachel: Totally. And I think also, that way, let's say the VBAC doesn't work out, you won't then be looking back over your shoulder and being like I should of/could of/why didn't I/if only. And you know, what do you want out of your birth experience? Well a lot, but part of it is a sense of peace. Right? That I did the best that I could. That my team did the best that they could.Meagan: Yes. Yeah and really interviewing your provider. Again, dating your provider and asking them the questions, learning more about them and what they do and their view. Taking out the yes and no questions and really trying to get to know this provider and letting them get to know you. I think it's just so impactful. I also, kind of like what you were saying with your first birth, also learning the other types of birth that could happen, you know learning about assisted birth. This is a new thing. Learning if assisted birth trumps a cesarean for you. Would you rather go for an assisted birth, even if it may end in cesarean, would you rather attempt that? Or would you just rather skip that and go right to the cesarean. Really educating yourself and trying not to push off the scary even though it can be scary. Rachel: Yes, yes. I love that you're saying this and I was just thinking about this and talking about this with a friend; there's stuff we hope doesn't happen. But not talking about it or thinking about it isn't going to protect us from it happening, it's just going to mean you're not prepared. Meagan: Yeah.Rachel: If it does happen. And yeah. Meagan: It's a disservice to ourselves. And it's weird. And it's hard to hear those stories. It's hard to hear the CBAC stories, it's hard to hear the uterine rupture stories that we do share on this podcast. Kind of what you're talking about the trigger warnings earlier, yeah it might be a trigger. It really might. But if we know all the signs of uterine rupture leading up to, we can be aware. And it's not something to hyperfocus on. We don't want it to be like oh my gosh I have this weird pain, right now, I don't know. It's not to make you scared, it really isn't. It's to just help you feel educated. Kind of what you were saying too. I don't know what a C-section looked like until I was in my own C-section. Rachel: Yeah. I've been talking about this recently with an anesthesiologist, some anti-anxiety medicine which you might get during a C-section, can cause memory loss. That's a side effect. So the time to decide…Let's say you're not planning on having a C-section. And then you're having a C-section and you're really anxious, really reasonable. The time to decide whether to take that anti-anxiety medicine which might cause memory loss; you should have an opportunity to reflect on that and talk about that and think about that not only in the moment when you're scared and should I take it right now or not. Meagan: Yeah.Rachel: It's just like that's not a good way to make a decision, you know?Meagan: Yeah. And also learning about alternatives. Okay, these are the side effects of this medication, and I don't think I'm willing to accept that. So let's talk about other medications and those side effects so we can see if we can switch it up. They have a whole bunch of things in their toolbox when it comes to medication. Rachel: Exactly. Meagan: For nausea. You know I had a medication and it affected my chest. It went all the way into my chest and I had to consciously focus on my chest moving. It was the weirdest feeling. Rachel: Terrifying, yeah. Meagan: I wish I would have known the alternatives to that. Right? So having these educated discussions, learning as much as you can. It's hard and it's scary and it's intimidating to not learn what you don't want. It's understandable, too.Rachel: Completely, completely. But that's informed consent, right? The risks, the benefits, the alternatives. And to go back to the anti-anxiety thing. You might be like okay, what could you do for me non-pharmacologically? Let's say I have a C-section and I'm feeling really anxious. Can I have a doula with me there who's giving me a massage? Can I have a doula there who's maybe put some lavender essence on a washcloth to hold to my nose. Can the anesthesiologist hold my hand and tell me it's going to be okay? And then you start actually opening up real options. Like wow I can have a doula with me?Meagan: Yes. That is something that I am very passionate about. We need to get doulas in the OR way more than we are. And I understand that it's like oh we don't have PPE, or oh it's an extra body, and oh it's a very big surgery, like I understand that. But I have been in the OR a good handful of times. And I understand my position in that room. I understand and respect my position in that room. And I always let an anesthesiologist know, if at any point something happens where I need to leave this room you just tell me. I will leave. No questions asked. But please let me be here with my client. Please let me stroke her hair. Please let me talk to her when dad goes over to baby so she's not alone. When you were put under general anesthesia to be there by your side, whether or not you were waking up in the OR. Because sometimes you could wake up sooner, or waking up in post-operative. Let's get these people here. Let's play music. Let's talk to them. Let's communicate the birth.I mean with my first C-section, they were complaining about the storm outside, they weren't even talking to me, right? And it would have impacted my birth in such a more positive light if I would have been talked to. And I wouldn't have felt like, what's going on. You know and all those things, you talked about it in your book. This drape that is separating us from our birth, it's just wild. So one of the questions we ask when you sign up to be on the podcast is topics of discussion that you would like to share, and one of those things is you said, why it's important to balance preparation for VBAC with an understanding of the systemic forces that promote C-sections. We're kind of talking about that, but do you have anything else to say on that? Rachel: I think that there is so much self-blame for having a C-section, when you wanted to have a vaginal birth. And go back to pain and suffering, that causes suffering. And it's heartbreaking to see that and to feel that. And when I think about it, I think what's important to keep in mind is like there are the particulars of your experience, right? Like your providers had the skills or didn't. They listened or they didn't. Your baby had decels or didn't. Like all that is real. And you're not the first or only person any of that is happening to. So why are we hooked up to electronic fetal monitoring, EFM, as soon as we walk into the hospital? Well that is because of how technology reigns supreme right now in every aspect of our society, but medicine too. And also that like it's an efficient system and medical birth, medicalized birth is all about efficiency and making as much money as possible frankly. Meagan: And there's even deeper history, we talk about that in our VBAC course, about why that was happening around cerebral palsy and what it actually did for cerebral palsy rates. All of these things. It's pretty fascinating when you get into it and understand one, why they do it and does it work? Does it make sense? They do it and just became practice and norm, but it did it actually impact the things that, okay how do I say this. Does it impact the things that they were originally creating it to impact? Rachel: Right. Totally. And it's actually the opposite; it was supposed to bring down the number of C-section rates, or the number of C-sections, when the number was like 4.5% in the early seventies and it's just gone in the opposite direction.There's so much evidence that you use it and it makes you more likely to have a C-section. And so yeah, okay, not your fault. That's the system. And I don't mean it in this way like, that's the system, give up, lay down, don't try to make your own feet, but also just to accept that that's what you're operating in and that's what your providers are operating in too. Right? Use it as a way to let go of the guilt and the shame and the, I messed up. My body messed up. Meagan: Yeah. Because there's so many of us that feel that. Rachel: Yes. Meagan: And it goes into the next topic they were saying that I think really can help us walk away with less of, I messed up. My body messed up. My baby failed me. You know whatever it may be. And doing effective research about the hospitals and their employment patterns and the chances of you even having a VBAC. That does kind of go into the balls in our court where we have to get the education and understand. But even when we do that, even when we don't have the best experience, in the end we're still going to look back at it as we did, WE did, the best we could. Right? And it takes less of that blame on us in a way because we know we did everything we could. Rachel: Yes.Meagan: And sometimes it just still happens. Even if you have the doula. Take the VBAC course. Read all the VBAC books, listen to all the podcasts, understand all the risks. Sometimes it still happens. Rachel: Totally. And I mean I think about in my case, like let's say my midwife hadn't come in for me and my OB hadn't been the one who had been attending that night, maybe I would have had a C-section. Because maybe the people there wouldn't have known how to effectively move my son's head. Even though I like did my best and that's okay. It has to be okay because you can't kind of change it. And again, not to be defeat-ist. But to find peace, just to find peace. Meagan: Yeah. I wish that for our VBAC community is finding peace and giving ourselves grace along our journeys. Because we've had 100's of podcast stories and there are so many of us who are still searching for peace. And still not offering ourselves grace, and putting that blame on us, or whatever, right? Everyone's so different and again, we talked about this earlier, it's just different. But I would love to see our community offering themselves more grace and finding more peace with their experiences along the way. And I don't exactly know what that healing looks like and how that peace is found. Do you have any suggestions on ways you have found peace with a very very very traumatic experience that not only led to trauma in that experience, but even in future procedures, in future experiences you know. Do you have any tips on just, guidance on finding peace? Rachel: I mean, I struggle with this still. And it sounds counterintuitive, but I think like not pushing away your feelings. And in the sense of not wallowing, but also not like struggling against them, trying to quiet them, make them be like ugh I hate this. Ugh I hate that I feel this way. Ugh if only I could get over it. So I'll say like, when I go to the doctor now, I get really scared especially if it's a new person and my blood pressure goes up and sometimes my heart rate goes up and it just sort of happens. And I hate it. And there are times when I'm like ugh I hate this part of me. I just hate it.But then when I'm kind of more accepting and it's like, this is how my body responds. It's understandable that this is how my body responds. And I take a Xanax actually. I say that to really take away the stigma I think that still exists around medical trauma and taking medication to manage your symptoms. I take a low dose Xanax before I go to see a provider and it helps me with my suffering. And also just like accepting. Because also there's this saying, if you struggle against the feelings of suffering, then you kind of suffer twice over. Right?Meagan: You do. Rachel: So I would say that, and then specifically for people who feel they had a traumatic experience, I've found EMDR treatment to be very effective, to deal with stuff in the body. That was pioneered more to deal with people who've been in like combat trauma, but it's very effective for traumatic birth. Tapping is another thing that can be very effective. And you can find that online, like there are different…Meagan: I was gonna say, you can go to YouTube and google trauma tapping or anything like that, and you can actually find some pretty great videos for free on how to do that. And it's pretty wild actually how well it works. Rachel: It really is. Meagan: Sometimes it's like wait, how is this working? It really does work. Rachel: Totally. And also I would say like in terms of again, peace, I think it's really important to speak openly about what has happened to you. And to the extent possible, we're conditioned to be like I'm just going to tie this up with a bow and it's okay. Someone says to you, you've expressed something hard, and they're like oh I'm so sorry and you're like it's okay, I'm going to be okay. Like you don't have to worry so much about reassuring your listener. You can be like yeah I had this C-section, and I'm still kind of upset about it. And yeah, that's how I feel. You don't have to self-qualify that. You know, but my baby is healthy. But I'm okay. But I love my baby. We do that; there's a lot of pressure to do that. And it's okay not to do that. It's okay to be like these are my feelings. And two things can be true at the same time. You can love your baby, and you can also be like I'm not that thrilled with the birth. Meagan: Awe yes. Julie and I have talked about that for years. They don't have to be separate. They can go together. You can love your baby and feel connected to your baby and really not like your birth experience. And you can also, we have found that people prep and then they have a vaginal birth and they're like I actually didn't really like that either. So you know, they don't have to just always be separate. You can be really happy and really be upset at the same time. It's okay to have those feelings, right? I have had things in my life where I've done something and I'm like dang. I really like how it turned out, but I hated the journey to getting there. And that's okay. So I love that you pointed that out. Rachel: Yes. or if you think about how you feel on your children's birthdays. So like I have very different feelings on my daughter's birthdays then my son's birthday. I had a good birth with my son. And it was good not because it was a VBAC, but because I was respected and I felt safe. That's what made that a good birth. Right? Just to be totally clear. I'm really glad I had a VBAC, I'm happy I got what
Budgeting genius, Heather Emerick is here to share her knowledge with us! If you're ready for accountability and upleveling your budget- check out this episode and her website here. Check out: www.diplobudgets.com Take some of the stress out of life by planning ahead for your own spending habits. Angi Solley is a Life Coach for Teens: www.teenlines.com
Jennie, Katie and Susie share a very personal story of diplo life, facing a medical challenge. Talk to Jennie at www.theexpatmom.com Talk to Katie at www.learningtoflourish.org Talk to Susie at www.healthyexpatparent.com Find us all and give us your ideas for the next show topic at: www.thebigpurpleblob.com
Charting Her Own Course: Building the Right Skills to Thrive at PostMelissa Dokurno's career has taken quite a few twists and turns since her spouse joined the Foreign Service, and even before he was officially on board. While they've both made sacrifices for each other's careers, they've kept their family strong even when physically separated.In this interview, Melissa tells the story of their difficult decision to live in different countries to take advantage of career opportunities. She also shares her recipe for success: be open to what's available!.BIOMelissa Dokurno, Esq. is a career public servant and proud mom. Over the past decade, she has strived to find the necessary work-life balance to both thrive as an EFM and build a career she is passionate about.Melissa began her career as a local prosecutor in Long Island, NY, serving for 3 years to help victims find their voice in an often daunting criminal justice system.Capitalizing on an opportunity to test-run EFM life, she and her 2-year-old daughter took a leap of faith to join her husband in El Salvador while he worked as a third-party contractor for U.S. Embassy San Salvador.In life's twists and turns, Melissa returned to Washington, D.C. to work as a Staff Attorney for Bread for the City Legal Clinic representing low-income and marginalized clients facing unlawful evictions; she served in that role until she departed Washington to officially begin her new life as an EFM.Melissa has also lived in Matamoros, Mexico, and Bangkok, Thailand, and used these opportunities to pivot her career to become an Investigative Analyst for Diplomatic Security. Building on that wealth of knowledge, Melissa finally joined the Civil Service in 2024 where she continues to serve as an Analyst while her family is posted in D.C. for the next two years.Melissa remains ready to discover new and enriching career opportunities while also enjoying where life takes her!..AW SponsorThis episode is sponsored by the Available Worldwide Network. AWN is a community-led private social network – i.e. not on Facebook – providing professional development, personal connection, and social support for the accompanying partners of the US Foreign Service.We all contribute a small fee to fund the platform, but right now in October 2024, you can check us out for free using coupon code FALL24. If you're a motivated EFM or MOH looking for connection in an empowering community, we invite you to join what we're building together!We know the challenges of trying to build and maintain careers both at home and abroad. But making friends in a safe and supportive community like AWN can make life a little easier and a lot more fun. Check out all the FAQs and find the coupon code FALL24 on our website: https://availableworldwide.net/awn/
Find out more about working with Sharoya and Jennie at www.thebigpurpleblob.com Book discussed: Anxious generation by Jonathan Haidt https://www.amazon.com/Anxious-Generation-Rewiring-Childhood-Epidemic/ Resources mentioned: Raising an adult, by Julie Lythcott-Haims https://www.amazon.com/How-to-Raise-an-Adult-audiobook/ Free Range Kids by Lenore Skenazy https://www.amazon.com/Free-Range-Kids-Lenore-Skenazy-audiobook/dp/ https://www.kff.org/mental-health/issue-brief/a-look-at-state-efforts-to-ban-cellphones-in-schools-and-implications-for-youth-mental-health/ A great podcast talking about kids and technology: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyFUBP4OhJs
A challenging topic for our overseas community to experience at a distance and when we are living in the US. See important resources below or visit us at The Big Purple Blob to share your ideas. www.thebigpurpleblob.com https://www.healthyexpatparent.com/post/again-use-your-words American Tragedy Documentary: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt10914182/ How to talk to your kids about scary world events: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-scary-world-events/id1525862812?i=1000555748938
Learn how to secure the best distribution deal for your film with these expert tips! In this podcast, we discuss the importance of meeting sales agents and distributors face-to-face at major film markets like the EFM in Berlin, Cannes Marché in France, and the American Film Market. Can't attend a market? Use Cinando.com to find the right acquisitions contacts at top companies. We also cover how to research distributors by looking at their track record and targeting those that specialize in your film's genre. Get your movie noticed and land the best distribution deal with these insider strategies! ——————————— VISIT FILMMAKING STUFF https://filmmakingstuff.com ACCESS EXCLUSIVE COMMUNITY Https://www.filmmakingstuffHQ.com GET THE BACKYARD BLOCKBUSTER BLUEPRINT https://www.filmmakingstuffhq.com/backyard-blockbuster-blueprint-info/ ———————————
In this episode, Lauren meets yet another life trajectory twin, Janelle Meyer, who went to college with dreams of being a graphic designer, but who eventually came back to her true calling, work helping students succeed. Janelle is a special educator with a real passion for using brain-based methods to help children learn to read and succeed in school. This episode covers her journey to becoming a special education teacher, the reasons why she loves having a partner in her small business, and the importance of finding continuity (in both your professional and social life!) in the otherwise unpredictable Foreign Service lifestyle.--Janelle Meyer is an international educator, inclusion advocate, avid runner, and mom. Having spent the last 15 years living and working in Beijing, Kuala Lumpur, Dar es Salaam (Tanzania), London, and the USA, she has developed a deep understanding of educational practices and how to support neurodiverse needs.Having an older brother with significant special needs, she has always sought inclusionary practices supporting the whole learner and family outside the classroom. In Malaysia, she was a founding board member of SENIA's local chapter (SENIM). Bridging the classroom to the real world, she founded chapters of Best Buddies International in China & Malaysia.With her masters in Special Education and as a certified dyslexia practitioner, she is the co-founder of Global Village Tutors, which reflects a holistic and evidence-based approach to nurturing well-rounded, resilient international students with Dyslexia and/or ADHD. GVT has experienced educators and professionals dedicated to helping students overcome their challenges and succeed academically in the world. They offer various services, from one-on-one instruction or school guidance through the learning support process tailored to each student and family's unique needs.Global Village Tutors WebsiteJanelle's LinkedInContribute to her World Vision team's fundraising goals for the Chicago Marathon Learn more about and get involved with Janelle's favorite global organizations supporting the needs of diverse children:SENIA NetworkBest Buddies
Bidding can be pretty overwhelming. Talk it through with experienced adults who understand. Join Sharoya Ham and Susie Czor-Brown. Work with us at www.thebigpurpleblob.com Resources mentioned in this episode: Below link to online version of the FSI Post Info to Go boxes that can be super useful for bidding considerations. https://online.fsi.state.gov/PITG (PITG-External), the online version for family members and interagency colleagues. Holding the fort abroad https://www.amazon.com/Holding-Fort-Abroad-Surviving-parenting/dp/1838167013
Purvi Gandhi Irwin works in a job that didn't exist when she entered her career field as a preservation project architect. She's a design tech consultant working with 3D modeling software and was recently hired by Overseas Building Operations (OBO). In our interview, Purvi shares questionable choices in high school, how her career has evolved, her special connection to the bathroom tiles in Eastern Market, and how she's managed to maintain a successful career as her family moves around the world. We also discuss ideas for a new podcast that she'd be great at! .BIOPurvi has spent the last 9 years supporting architects, interior architects, and engineers with their design technology needs at Shifted Paradigm Design. This includes teaching a 3D modeling software called Revit, creating digital content, developing workflows and standards, troubleshooting issues, and finding creative solutions to both design and modeling problems.With over 25 years of design experience, most spent as a preservation project architect, Purvi specialized in using innovative technologies to facilitate the documentation and rehabilitation of institutional buildings, and 16+ years of Revit experience working with existing buildings (most historic), from conceptual design, through construction administration and project close-out.She recently joined the DOS Bureau of Overseas Buildings Operations and is working in a DETO position as her husband is an FSO. Purvi is a registered architect with degrees in Architecture and Historic Preservation and was a 10-year board member on the Alexandria, Virginia Board of Architectural Review.Additionally, she has presented at a variety of conferences and webcasts around the world and has also been involved in DEIA-related initiatives in both the design fields and in her community. She is a Girl Scout leader, an avid crafter, and loves to travel in her free time.Connect with Purvi:https://shiftedparadigm.wixsite.com/spdesignhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/purviirwinhttps://x.com/BIMchiq.This episode is sponsored by U.S. History for ExpatsCalling all parents! U.S. History for Expats has U.S. history courses forming right now. Did you know that all 50 states require U.S. history in middle school and 40 states require a U.S. history for graduation? Don't let your children miss out.U.S. History for Expats has an elementary, middle, and high school program to fit your needs. This year, in grades 1-4 we are introducing ‘live' biweekly activities in addition to the Studies Weekly program. Our accredited middle school and high school classes have been designed specifically for the children of American diplomats and cover the entire spectrum of U.S. history using the most recent Virginia Standards of Learning.What makes us different? We provide tons of feedback, unlimited support, and we are the first EFM-owned program to be accredited. Using experience from teaching in seven international schools, we fill in the gaps your international school might be missing.Sign up for a course or an information session by visiting www.ushistoryforexpats.com today. And don't forget, all of our classes can be 100% reimbursed using the Supplemental Instructional Allowance.
We're on summer break! We just wanted to share a quick update about how you can get involved in the next season of episodes AND how to stay connected to the Available Worldwide community. Apply to be a guest: https://availableworldwide.net/contact/Join the Available Worldwide Network: https://availableworldwide.net/available-worldwide-network/You'll hear from us again in September!
In this episode, HeHe is joined by Caitlyn Schollmeier to discuss electronic fetal monitoring. They cover what electronic fetal monitoring is, why it is used, differences between continuous and intermittent monitoring, and various related topics. They also explore the implications of different monitoring choices on labor and delivery, including how interventions like Pitocin and epidurals require monitoring and tips for how different monitoring methods might affect movement and comfort during labor. In this episode, we're diving into the following questions: When providers often use each type of monitoring and why they may use continuous monitoring more often. How long are the breaks during intermittent monitoring? What types of monitoring are best for low risk labors versus more complicated pregnancies? What helps when we start to see wonky fetal heartones? So what are some scenarios where you would want electronic fetal monitoring? Guest Bio: Caitlyn Schollmeier is a former birth doula and labor & delivery nurse. She created Lila, a maternity brand that specializes in creating beautiful and comfortable labor clothing that provides privacy while still being accessible for routine medical care. Lila has 4 different styles of birth gown that all provide access for fetal heart monitoring, skin to skin, breastfeeding, massage, epidural placement and more. Social Media: Connect with HeHe on IG Connect with Caitlyn on Instagram Connect with Caitlyn on TikTok BIRTH EDUCATION: Join The Birth Lounge here for judgment-free childbirth education that prepares you for an informed birth and how to confidently navigate hospital policy to have a trauma-free labor experience! Download The Birth Lounge App for birth & postpartum prep delivered straight to your phone! LINKS MENTIONED: Birth Gown (use code BIRTHLOUNGE15 to save 15% off): https://www.wearlila.com/ ACOG stance on EFM: https://www.acog.org/womens-health/faqs/fetal-heart-rate-monitoring-during-labor https://www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/practice-bulletin/articles/2010/11/management-of-intrapartum-fetal-heart-rate-tracings https://www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/practice-bulletin/articles/2021/06/antepartum-fetal-surveillance
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