Podcasts about Mood ring

With Beck still in the dog house, Donny is joined by an old friend. The mighty Mood Ring returns to entice Donny to join the Mood Ring Corps. The sales pitch is cut short as Donny and Mood Ring are captured by the smartest being in the universe, Thought Daughter! Can they escape? Find out on a brand new episode of City of Supers!Credits:Brendan Connors as Thought Daughter, Jason Alexander, & Jay LenoNick Connors as Donny Dennis, Computer Voice, & Buzz Aldrin,Sean Connors as Mood Ring"Americana" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

You can get access to our Rick Owens beanie giveaway and hear episodes early at our HeroHero!Hi everyone!On this episode, Sol and Michael bring back the listener question format from earlier PoK seasons! Tune in as they discuss Sol's theory of the four quadrants of clothing, Discwoman, Sweat Equity, the underground warehouse raves of pre-COVID Brooklyn, fast fashion, finance bros, cabaret laws, how to get cheap raw denim, Mercari / Yahoo Japan, how clothing has changed to accommodate for a fitpic, underrated style icons, and so much more!Hope you enjoy the episode, and lots of love!SolSol Thompson and Michael Smith explore the world and subcultures of fashion, interviewing creators, personalities, and industry insiders to highlight the new vanguard of the fashion world. Subscribe for weekly uploads of the podcast, and don't forgot to follow us on our social channels for additional content, and join our discord to access what we've dubbed “the happiest place in fashion”.Message us with Business Inquiries at pairofkingspod@gmail.comSubscribe to get early access to podcasts and videos, and participate in exclusive giveaways for $4 a month Links: Instagram TikTok Twitter/X Sol's Substack (One Size Fits All) Sol's Instagram Michael's Instagram Michael's TikTok

Longtime beauty executive Lori Singer has been instrumental in some of the biggest fragrance license deals of the past 20 years. Singer spent more than a decade at Coty, where she worked on bestselling fragrances by Calvin Klein, Vera Wang, Balenciaga and Nautica. She also tripled global net revenues for Marc Jacobs with its iconic Daisy franchise launched in 2007. Singer got her start at Revlon, and her CV also includes Calvin Klein Cosmetics, Unilever and Benetton Group.  “I've spent my entire career in beauty. I'm sort of a beauty lifer,” she told Glossy. “I fell in love on day one at Revlon, my first job, and I really have never looked back.”  Singer joined Parlux in 2019 to grow its license business and immediately set her sights on Billie Eilish.  “Other than music, fragrance and scent are everything to her. So, upon meeting her and hearing about her deep knowledge [of fragrance, we knew it was a fit for Parlux],” Singer told Glossy. “She knows ingredients and she knows about olfactory territory. She has had a natural nose for scents." By 2021, her first scent, Eilish, was released, which she followed up with Eilish No. 2 the next year and Eilish No. 3 in 2023.  Fast forward to last week, and Parlux released Eilish's fourth fragrance, called Your Turn. The new scent is priced at $90 for 100 milliliters and available DTC — it will launch in Ulta Beauty doors later this spring. Your Turn is gender-neutral and described as “warm, woody and fresh” with notes of peach, ginger and sandalwood.  Frank Voelkl, principal perfumer at fragrance house Firmenich, was the “nose.” One of the most famous perfumers working today, he has created Glossier's You franchise, Phlur's Mood Ring and Father Figure, and Le Labo's cult Santal 33, among others.  Parlux is a global licensee for celebrities, fashion houses and lifestyle brands. The company launched in 1984 and is privately held. Its licenses include Kenneth Cole, Vince Camuto, Jessica Simpson, Steve Madden and Jason Wu, among others. Most recently, Parlux entered into a partnership with basketball player LeBron James to create The Shop, a line of grooming products distributed through Walmart. Then, in late 2024, the company launched its first fragrance with influencer-turned-designer Danielle Bernstein, the creator behind WeWoreWhat, called WeWoreWhat 001.  Later this year, the company will celebrate another milestone: Paris Hilton's 30th fragrance over 20 years. Called Iconic, the scent will launch this spring.  Singer joined the Glossy Beauty Podcast to discuss the secret sauce behind Parlux's celeb fragrances, the evolving fragrance consumer and 2025 industry predictions.

This week, hosts Jim DeRogatis and Greg Kot share their highly-anticipated “Best Albums” of 2024. Plus, they'll also hear selections from production staff.Join our Facebook Group: https://bit.ly/3sivr9TBecome a member on Patreon: https://bit.ly/3slWZvcSign up for our newsletter: https://bit.ly/3eEvRnGMake a donation via PayPal: https://bit.ly/3dmt9lUSend us a Voice Memo: Desktop: bit.ly/2RyD5Ah Mobile: sayhi.chat/soundops Featured Songs:Redd Kross, "Candy Coloured Catastrophe," Redd Kross, In the Red, 2024The Beatles, "With A Little Help From My Friends," Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, Parlophone, 1967Beyoncé, "LEVII'S JEANS," Cowboy Carter, Parkwood and Columbia, 2024Tyler, The Creator, "Take Your Mask Off (feat. Daniel Caesar & Latoiya Williams)," Chromakopia, Columbia, 2024Chelsea Wolfe, "Tunnel Lights," She Reaches Out to She Reaches Out to She, Loma Vista, 2024Shellac, "I Don't Fear Hell," To All Trains, Touch and Go, 2024Mdou Moctar, "Oh France," Funeral for Justice, Matador, 2024English Teacher, "The World's Biggest Paving Slab," This Could Be Texas, Universal Island, 2024Shirlette Ammons, "Short (feat. Mavis Swan Poole)," Spectacles, Puddin Pie, 2024Pedro the Lion, "Spend Time," Santa Cruz, Polyvinyl and Big Scary Monsters, 2024Idles, "Roy," TANGK, Partisan, 2024Finom, "Hungry," Not God, Joyful Noise, 2024Sabrina Carpenter, "Taste," Short n' Sweet, Island, 2024Dehd, "Mood Ring," Poetry, Fat Possum, 2024Amyl and the Sniffers, "Chewing Gum," Cartoon Darkness, B2B, 2024Elucid, "THE WORLD IS DOG," REVELATOR, Fat Possum, 2024Hurray For the Riff Raff, "Buffalo," The Past Is Still Alive, Nonesuch, 2024Redd Kross, "Born Innocent," Redd Kross, In the Red, 2024Mary Timony, "The Guest," Untame the Tiger, Merge, 2024SPRINTS, "TICKING," Letter to Self, City Slang, 2024Unknown, "Santa Clause is Coming to Town," Unknown, Unknown, UnknownSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Would you wear a ring that can (supposedly) measure your well-being?Show website: www.truestoriespodcast.comBecome a Patreon Supporter: https://bit.ly/3XLR99vBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/true-stories-with-seth-andrews--5621867/support.

It's the perfume podcast crossover you've been waiting for! Today, I am joined by Smell Ya Later Co-Hosts Sable Yong and Tynan Sinks! What has vanilla done for you lately, why skin scents are fake news, should you get a salmon facial, and Die Hot With a Vengeance—the book AND perfume(!) created by Sable, all in this week's episode! FRAGS MENTIONED: Atelier Des Ors: Chouer des Anges, Blue Madeleine, Villa Primerose; Christan Dior Bois D'Argent, Vilhelm Sparkling Jo, Akro Ink, Dedcool Xtra Milk, Le Labo Santal 33, Glossier You, Kylie Jenner Cosmic, Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb, YSL Libre, Billie Eilish Eilish, Phlur: Soft Spot, Missing Person, Mood Ring; Britney Spears Believe, Phlur Vanilla Skin, Armani Sun di Gioia, Kilian Intoxicated, Byredo Pulp, D.S. & Durga Black Magenta, Ariana Grande Cloud, D.S. & Durga IDK What, Dedcool Milk, Nue Co. Forest Lungs, ELOREA Fire, D.S. & Durga Black Magenta, Hawthorne Canary Diamond, Skylar Citrus Reverie, Hoax Die Hot With A Vengeance, Glossier Balm.com Mango, Ariana Grande Cloud TIX TO SUMMER SWAP: summerswap.eventbrite.com FOLLOW SMELL YA LATER: @smellyalater.mp3 DIE HOT WITH A VENGEANCE: shorturl.at/AqyHC ALLURE ARTICLE: https://www.allure.com/story/love-hate-relationship-vanilla-perfume

Elinah Shams, also known as DJ BOSSY BOOTS, is the founder of She.They.DJ, a Brooklyn-based party series that champions women, non-binary, and trans DJs. Their weekly happy hour event at Mood Ring not only showcases diverse talents but also promotes inclusivity within the music scene.Additionally, BOSSY BOOTS is a key member of BBL (Booty Bass Lift), a dynamic trio including DJs and producers Kooxla and Thirdself. Together, they curate an electrifying party experience that celebrates various genres of club music, from ghettotech to juke, jersey to bmore, and electro to hip hop.In this episode, BOSSY BOOTS shares insights into the origins of She.They.DJ and her efforts to elevate LGBTQIA+ voices and talent in the music industry. She also discusses her upbringing in Russia, her role as a movement teacher, and her ongoing endeavors in community-building.Tracklist ~Kooxla -HYBRYDADJ Shannon - ??? Forthcoming!Support the Show.

"Was it a ritual, or were you just sleeping in a park in Canberra?" asks guest Stelly G (artist/director behind Mood Ring). In the lead up to The Mountain dropping in Australian cinemas (June 27th 2024) MMM's tiny desk hosts three big mouths coming down. They've just met Rachel House, the film's director/writer. The three discuss meeting Rachel on a level, then the microphone levels peak as they argue over camping fashion, actors being scarier than models, The Mountain's three child stars, Stelly's process, the KFC in Alice Springs and playing to your strengths. Full conversation, no bleeps, tears were cried, I put this moment here. Full Rachel House interview dropping next week, The Mountain comes to cinemas Thursday June 27th. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

After releasing Blue Skies in 2022, the Chicago trio known as Dehd decided to turn a writing session into a road trip and filled their van to the brim with recording equipment, camping out in an Earthship in New Mexico to work as long as their solar panels kept their electricity on. And then onto the next adventure — the quiet of the Puget Sound. Eating, breathing, sleeping and their purpose, writing, turned into their album Poetry. 

samisosa is a dynamic producer and artist currently studying at Jay Z's Roc Nation School of Music in Brooklyn, NY. With a lifelong love for music, they began playing the piano at just 8 years old, composing classical pieces that showcased her talent. Now, delving into production and discovering her true passion. Her music spans genres like Drum and Bass, UK Garage, Jungle, Hip Hop/Boom Bap, and Experimental music, pushing boundaries and creating captivating sounds. Sami now DJs and books events with her DJ collective "Dugout Radio" at venues like TBA Brooklyn, Wonderville, Red Pavilion, Jade, Mood Ring and more. Tracklist 1. Limit - BAKEY 2. Battle - Wookie/Lain 3. Imagine (Asylum Remix) - Shola Ama 4. What You Came For - Mosca 5. A London Thing -(Extended) - Scott Garcia/MC Styles 6. U BELONG 2 ME - Y U QT 7. 4amin - samisosa 8. Sunshine (Wookie Main Mix) - GABRIELLE/Wookie 9. Get Down (We Can Get Down) - Groove Chronicles (Noodles) 10. FEEL - IZCO 11. Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) - Oxide & Neutrino 12. Dancing Round the Truth (IZCO Remix) - Katy B/IZCO 13. Crazy Love - MJ Cole/Elizabeth Troy 14. Never Gonna Let You Go (Kelly G Bump-N-Go Dub Edit - Tina Moore/Kelly G. 15. It's the Way '99 - Future Underground Nation  16. Don't Kid Yourself - Nia Archives 17. Do you Really Like It? - DJ Pied Piper & The Masters of Ceremonies 18. RIP Groove (Radio Edit) - Double 99 19. Try Me Out (Let Me Lick It) - Sunship/Anita Kelsey 20. Split Ends - samisosa 21. Gabriel (Live Garage Mix) - Roy Davis Jr./Everett 22. Jump to It - Double 995

Chriselle started as an OG fashion influencer. In 2021, she took over Phlur during a divorce and used fragrance to create what some call her “breakup album.” The result? A collection that's as personal as it gets, capturing a whirlwind of emotions as she embarked on a new life chapter.In this episode, Chriselle sits down with Marianne Mychaskiw, who runs communications at Scentbird. We explore the power of scent in tough times, why skin musks are here to stay, and the story behind her viral fragrance, Missing Person, which drew a waitlist of 200,000 before it even dropped.Highlights:• An intro from Marianne• How Chriselle pairs her outfits with scent• “I understood the power of fragrance”• A glimpse into Chriselle's YouTube channel• The vulnerability behind Missing Person• TikTok's reaction to Missing Person• It smells like skin (and that's the point)• The fragrance to wear… at the gym?• Father Figure, Phlur's first green fragrance• Embracing the masculine and the feminine• What makes Phlur so relatable• Chriselle's favorite campaign• Not Your Baby, inspired by Michelle Pfeiffer in “Scarface”• “I don't want a man in my life but I still want to feel sexy”• She's sweet but she's sassy• Mood Ring, a happy floral scent• A nod to 90s fun times• Phlur's early pioneering in clean fragrance• Building Phlur for a new generation• Beyond Scent: Scent + Style Q&A• Why skin musks are here to stay• Chriselle's least favorite fragrance note• Fragrances Chriselle and Marianne would leave behind• What Chriselle wears on a regular day vs. Fashion Week• Chriselle's favorite fragrances (outside of Phlur)• How to find your sense of style• “In my 40s and afraid to show up as myself”• Scent Connection: Moods Edition• Raising daughters who are emotionally awareFeatured Fragrances:Missing Person by PhlurFather Figure by PhlurNot Your Baby by PhlurMood Ring by PhlurBonus Content:Bonus clips available at https://youtube.com/scentbird:Chriselle's favorite body mists and Phlur's newest Launch, Strawberry LetterSoak in all of our audio and video content at https://podcast.scentbird.com.

For episode 82, we dive into the vibrant world of a self-taught producer and DJ, @nextdimensional.In 2018, nextdimensional packed her bags and made the move from Minneapolis to the bustling streets of Brooklyn. Since then, she's been a force to be reckoned with in the New York City music scene. Independently releasing music and curating her own event series, Lucid Dream, nextdimensional has ignited the decks at hotspots like Mi Sabor Cafe and Mood Ring. She's also taken her energetic sets abroad to Tokyo.Nextdimensional is the co-founder of Lucid Radio which she runs alongside Dev Moore out of their shared studio in Ridgewood. The fun radio series showcases emerging talent in the underground dance music scene here in New York and abroad.Nextdimensional's production is unmatched. She combines ethereal and wavy soundscapes with pulsing hypnotic rhythms. With a penchant for variety, her original works traverse the realms of breaks, techno, and East Coast-inspired club music. It's a sonic adventure that keeps her audience on their toes and her new EP "Mazeworld" perfectly embodies the spirit of her dreamlike electronic production.In this episode, nextdimensional spoke to Shannon about her upbringing in Minnesota and the DIY culture in her hometown that inspired her love for music and art. She also touched on her production, her passion for teaching and the inspiration behind her new EP “Mazeworld.” Tracklist ~Break Mommy - nextdimensionalHalloween Party - nextdimensional *off "Mazeworld".DJ Simulator - nextdimensional * off "Mazeworld."FUCKLUV FLIP - nextdimensionalEP Release Party Info:  www.eventbrite.com/e/mazeworld-nex…ts-800195836287Support the show

Vanessa Li is the co-founder of Mood Ring, a bar & venue in Bushwick, Brooklyn, and co-author of Margarita In Retrograde: Cocktails For Every Sign, published in 2022 by Abrams Books. Originally from San Francisco, she now splits her time between New York and Los Angeles working in nightlife and hospitality. She loves rabbits.www.moodringnyc.clubhttps://www.abramsbooks.com/product/margarita-in-retrograde_9781419758898/https://www.instagram.com/moodringnyc/https://www.tiktok.com/@moodringnyc------Watch the full episode on the PUTF's YouTube channel:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCiNe5PJsOAutdKVnvej8MQThe PUTF show is an extension of the PUTF podcast, dedicated to showcasing inspiring creatives from the PUTF community and beyond. Guests are invited to share their unique career journeys, stories, and visions. The PUTF show is produced by WAVDWGS, a video production company based in NYC.https://www.wavdwgs.comPick Up The Flow, is an online resource based in NYC striving to democratize access to opportunities. Opportunities are shared daily on this page and website, and weekly via our newsletter. More on putf.susbtack.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today's Song of the Day is “Mood Ring” from Dehd's album Poetry, out May 10. Dehd will be performing at Fine Line on Monday, November 11.

The powerful Mood Ring returns and just in time as the evil Apatath has overtaken Beck! Will Donny and Mood Ring get Beck to feel... anything? Find out on a brand new episode of City of Supers! Credits: Brendan Connors as Beck Wayward & Apatath Nick Connors as Donny Dennis & Cupid Lovebug Sean Connors as Mood Ring "Smooth Lovin" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ "Wounded" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Hour 2 of A&G features... The grilling of the social media CEO's in a Senate Hearing... The not-surprising response to Elmo's social question... Biden & the Houthi drone strike... The Sec Def appears...and Jack is not happy!  Stupid Should Hurt: https://www.armstrongandgetty.com/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hour 2 of A&G features... The grilling of the social media CEO's in a Senate Hearing... The not-surprising response to Elmo's social question... Biden & the Houthi drone strike... The Sec Def appears...and Jack is not happy!  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hour 2 of A&G features... The grilling of the social media CEO's in a Senate Hearing... The not-surprising response to Elmo's social question... Biden & the Houthi drone strike... The Sec Def appears...and Jack is not happy!  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joe is entered the Asheville music scene just a couple of years ago and is making a big impact. On this episode he shares how he pushed past the compulsion to kill on the drums every time he plays and how it has given him new energy to put into his music. I highly recommend checking out this artist whenever and wherever you can. He can be seen with his band Sugar Bomb with Jacob Bruner and Eli Kahn, sitting in Mood Ring, and several other projects. He can be found on IG @electric.jophisSugar Bomb is @sugarbombjazzHe gave us another amazing playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6J5ktLNH0bS0ih9tsmGqEM?si=394a671317ba4347 Feel free to reach out to me on https://www.drummermindset.com/contact Don't miss out on the amazing live musical talent in Asheville or wherever you live. 

Here's what you need to know for today in the business of podcasting: Sounder Analysis: NPR's News Podcasts Significantly Safer for Brands than General Population of News PodcastingContent Mood Targeting5 Strategies For Podcast Expansion In A Zero-Sum Audio World by Steven GoldsteinHow Will Contextual Advertising Fare When The FTC Revises Its COPPA Rule? by Allison Schiff…as for the rest of the news: iHeartmedia and Magnite join forces to launch a new marketplace, AdLarge signs exclusive sales partnership with Fable & Folly, Audacy files for bankruptcy, USG Audio scales back Universal's podcast development, and Voxalyze announces a shutdown of their services due to lack of investment.

Here's what you need to know for today in the business of podcasting: Sounder Analysis: NPR's News Podcasts Significantly Safer for Brands than General Population of News PodcastingContent Mood Targeting5 Strategies For Podcast Expansion In A Zero-Sum Audio World by Steven GoldsteinHow Will Contextual Advertising Fare When The FTC Revises Its COPPA Rule? by Allison Schiff…as for the rest of the news: iHeartmedia and Magnite join forces to launch a new marketplace, AdLarge signs exclusive sales partnership with Fable & Folly, Audacy files for bankruptcy, USG Audio scales back Universal's podcast development, and Voxalyze announces a shutdown of their services due to lack of investment.

Death by Boomer with Jeff Styles - every Wednesday! Party Ring vs. Mood Ring! Let's face it - the boomers are the 2nd greatest generation to ever walk planet earth! From our music to our toys (we survived lawn darts) - we made the world better! Yes, better even for you gen x'ers - gen y's and millennials - we're just better!! AND....worse - we also used up all the resources - became a little spoiled and maybe we have clung to power a little too long. Misunderstood - that is what we are! These short episodes will hopefully bridge the gap with the x'ers, y'ers (if that's even a word) and millennials - Death by Boomer with Jeff Styles on DTB - powered by WWW.MEDICAREMISTY.COM (A PODCAST PROVIDED AND OWNED BY DURING THE BREAK PODCASTS) Please consider leaving us a review on Apple and giving us a share to your friends! This podcast is powered by ZenCast.fm

C. Russell Price is originally from Glade Spring, Virginia, but now lives in Chicago. They are a Lambda Fellow in Poetry, a Ragdale Fellow, a Windy City Times 30 Under 30 honoree, an essayist, and a poet. They are the author of a chapbook, Tonight, We Fuck the Trailer Park Out of Each Other (Sibling Rivalry Press) and the full length collection oh, you thought this was a date?!: Apocalypse Poems (Northwestern University Press). Their current projects are Bisquick: Seance Poems and I Don’t Need a Mood Ring; I’ve Got a Face (a memoir). They are on the editorial and curatorial boards for the Ragdale Foundation, Story Studio Chicago, and The Anarchist Review of Books. The First Time is a live lit and music series recorded at Martyrs in Chicago's North Center neighborhood. Each reader tells a true first tale, followed by any cover of the storyteller's choosing, performed by our house band, The First Time Three. The First Time is hosted by Jenn Sodini. Produced by Bobby Evers, Andy Vasoyan, and Julie Mueller. Podcast produced by Andy Vasoyan. Recorded by Tony Baker.

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Robert tells us how a meeting with a potential investor went this week. Then, the wives talk about what makes them “feel like a writer,” and Ariel helps Robert mentally prepare for an isolated, self-imposed writing retreat in the desert. Intro/outro by Ben McSherry.

This week on It's Happening: highlights from past episodes featuring The Sorrentinos (The One Hundredth), Leah Remini (Second Act with Leah Remini), Aja Kween (My Drag is Like a Mood Ring with Aja Kween), and Bowen Yang & Matt Rogers (The Xmas Special). Subscribe and Watch on YouTube This episode is sponsored by: BetterHelp Béis Factor - Promo code: SNOOKI50

Todd and Maria discuss a must-have for anyone's bathroom.Produced by The Host With The Most, LLC.

Remember Mood Rings?? I remember mine always being turquoise! Todays' topic ssi a play on the millennial fav and how it relates to social media present day. /Share yout thoughts @alishainc For a more personal take, head over to patreon and support: https://patreon.com/alishainc?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=join_link

Thrilled to share a loving and talented amiga, Ilona Pamplona the week of her book release! I met Ilona online in 2020 and we've been cheering each other on ever since. We met briefly as I made my way to the WEALLGROWLATINA conference at the airport in Fort Lauderdale in 2022- and she's as wonderful in person as she is online! I wanted to take a moment and have this conversation on the eve of her first book release to share her magic and wisdom con ustedes!   Ilona shares her love of music, travel and spirituality and how each has shaped her life's journey.   How Ilona's  Saturn return supported her through a tough time as she experienced workplace stress and mistreatment.   How her father's passing inspired Ilona to take a leap to help others.   A chance meeting with a holistic doctor who validated her experience, therapy and leaning into her tools.   How her North Node in Virgo inspired her focus on her own healing.   Her journey through a three year Masters in Coaching and how that focus on meditation has served her during her grieving process.   How Ilona started her business with color oracle readings.   How her Libra stellium influenced her networking gifts and her experiences with memberships like Manifest House and Las Comadres who are now The Anima Collective.    How astrology can maximize the energies of our birth chart to thrive in our lives and business   Ilona shares about This Journal is Your Mood Ring and how it came to be birthed.    How Las Comadres became The Anima Collective and how Ilona became the Chief Community Officer.   Where Ilona sees 2023 going astrologically.   The Ancestral patterns of lack that she's needed to transform.   Check out Ilona's  Book and follow her for Astrology based coaching!    IG: https://www.instagram.com/ilonapamplona   Website:  https://www.ilonapamplona.com BIO:  Ilona Pamplona is an Astrology informed life coach and author of This Journal Is Your Mood Ring: Deepen Your Self-Understanding Using Color as Your Guide, who is committed to showing you how to love your life through the To amplify the reconnection with our most magical self, she explores the spirit of words, interprets the complexities of our astrological charts, and uses chakra cards to balance the wisdom of our body's energy centers. All of this to create a sacred container for her clients to reveal themselves and develop their self-compassion muscle.magic of the stars! She has helped hundreds of women reconnect with their inner world, harness the magic of their emotions, and transform their most important relationship: the one they have with themselves.

This week the mighty Mood Ring stops by the conversation pit to show Donny and Beck how his superpowers are dictated by his emotions. From sad to happy to sneezy, he tells all! There was also some mystical super boy named Fleet that stopped by, but honestly, Donny and Beck are trying to forget that ever happened. Credits: Beck Wayward; Brendan Connors Donny Dennis: Nick Connors The Mood Ring: Sean Connors Fleet: Aly Seechock

CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains a lengthy discussion on mental health, depression, anxiety, self harm, and suicidal ideation. In the season eight finale of the show (the fifth episode of the season, and the 48th episode overall) Kevin welcomes writer and podcast host Anna Borges to the show. Anna is the author of The More or Less Definitive to Self-Care, and the host of the mental health podcast Mood Ring. The two talk about the expression "theatre kid," being depressed teenagers who turned into depressed adults, and Anna's love of the Spotify algorithm. To learn more about Anna, please follow her on Twitter or Instagram. The essay "I Am Not Always Very Attached to Being Alive," can be read here. Subscribe to the podcast she hosts, Mood Ring, here. For additional information about Anhedonic Headphones, please click here.    Episode Musical Credits Intro Music: "Brooklyn Zoo (instrumental)," written by Russell Jones, Dennis Coles, and Robert Diggs; originally performed by Ol' Dirty Bastard. Taken from the Get On Down reissue of Return to The 36 Chambers: The Dirty Version, 2011.  Outro Music: "What Does Your Soul Looks Like (Part 4)," performed by DJ Shadow. Endtroducing..., Mo Wax, 1996. Incidental Music: "Cymbal Rush," written by Thom Yorke; performed by Christopher O'Riley.   “My Immortal,” written by Amy Lee, Ben Moody, and David Hodges ;performed by Evanescence. Fallen, Wind Up, 2003. “Addicted,” written by Pierre Bouvier, Chuck Comeau, Arnold Lanni, Sébastien Lefebvre, and Jeff Stinco ;performed by Simple Plan. No Pads, No Helmets, Just Balls, Warner Brothers, 2003. “All Hail The Heartbreaker," written and performed by The Spill Canvas. Sunsets and Car Crashes, One Eleven Records, 2003. “Be Calm,” written by Nate Ruess, Andrew Dost, Jack Antonoff, and Sam Means; performed by fun. Aim and Ignite, fun music, 2009 “Are You Satisfied,” written by Marina Diamandis; performed by Marina And The Diamonds. The Family Jewels, 679 Recordings, 2010. “Black Sheep,” written by Gin Wigmore and Butch Walker; performed by Gin Wigmore. Gravel and Wine, Universal Music, 2011 “Scream," written by Harry Springer; performed by The Midnight Club. Self released 2019 “C'est La Mort,” written by Joy Williams and John Paul White; performed by The Civil Wars. Barton Hollow, Columbia, 2011. “Dust and Ashes,” written by Dave Malloy; performed by Josh Groban. Natasha, Pierre, and The Great Comet of 1812, Reprise, 2017. “House by The Sea,” written by Pål Moddi Knutsen; performed by Moddi. Set The House on Fire, Propeller, 2013. “Stranger,” written by Thomas Freeman; performed by Covey. Self-released, 2015

Listen below with the audio player or Click Here for complete show notes and video from the show. Feedback Voicemail Mike Robison Krazy Joe QOTW: What older classic horror movie would you recommend? Technorama On This Day in History for … Continue reading →

Continuing our series on Finding God in Art, we look at Lorde’s career and her song “Mood Ring,” as we look at how Jesus’ presence moves us from cynicism to hope. Given by Pastor Jon on 8/28/22.

There are a lot of reasons to take care of something — like a plant, or a car or a house. It can be a source of purpose or passion or peace or simple satisfaction. Today we're exploring how taking care of something can be a form of self-care.  Host Anna Borges talks with Jené Etheridge — music producer, DJ, community organizer, and an avid cyclist — about how caring for her bike Butter feeds her mental health.  Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark!  Full Transcript   Anna Borges: There's this old book that I'm willing to bet at least some of you found formative. It's called The Care and Keeping of You.   MUSIC   And I hope some of you just went OH, THAT BOOK, but you know for the uninitiated, The Care and Keeping of You is this illustrated American Girl guidebook and it was the first real introduction a lot of us got to our bodies and how to take care of them. It covered everything from how to sit when inserting a tampon to you know proper armpit shaving technique.   Legions of preteens referred to that book like a user's manual, myself included. You know, learning as much as we could about maintaining these weird changing bodies that we did not know the first thing about. Understanding what was going on with my body and like the ins and outs in taking care of it made me feel — I mean I don't want to oversell it but it did — it made me feel like confident and grown up and empowered, or at least more capable of handling the horrors of middle school such as like changing in the locker room and wondering why my boobs looked so much different than everyone else's.   These days, I'm kind of still chasing that high if I'm honest. Like shockingly, huh-huh, taking care of myself as an adult is hardly as satisfying as The Care and Keeping of You once had me believe.   MUSIC FADE OUT   But as I grew up, I did discover that there are a lot of other things that I can take care of, other than myself, and some of them even come with the step-by-step instructions that I was craving. And it turns out, the care and keeping of something else can be as satisfying as the care and keeping of us.   THEME MUSIC   Hey,  I'm Anna Borges, and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings even when you're feeling less than capable of taking care of yourself.   I've probably said “care” enough times for you to get that we're talking about care today. Care for ourselves. Care for some thing. And caring for ourselves by way of caring for that something.   If you haven't guessed, I'm on the lookout for something new to take care of because honestly I have not been that great of a job at taking care of myself lately. And sometimes, when we lose trust in our ability to take care of ourselves, I don't know, we need to find ways to prove to ourselves that we still can.   THEME MUSIC FADE OUT   At least, that's where I'm at lately. There are a lot of reasons to take care of something for our mental health, whether it's by giving ourselves a source of purpose or passion or peace or simple satisfaction.   So what are we taking care of?   There are the obvious suspects: things that rely on you for nourishment and support, like pets or plants or children. But we can also find meaning in caring for nonliving things too -  things like our homes, cars, beaches, sneakers, closets — and in the case of our guest today, bikes.   MUSIC   Our guest today is a woman of many talents. Jené Etheridge is a music producer, DJ, community organizer and an avid cyclist.   She tells us about her relationship with her bike, how she cares for it as she travels the world with it. And how it in turn feeds her mental health.   Anna: I would love to just hear how you got into cycling. I just never really got into it. It kind of scared me, but what's your story?   Jené: Yeah, so I was in college at The University of Washington in Seattle, and I just needed a way to get around. Also I had a friend um who rode with me like casually. We would go on casual rides and I told him I would have a new commute from U district to SoDo, which is like six miles.   And he was like, yeah, I don't think you can do it. And I was like, oh, you don't think I can do it? and basically I was like, I'm gonna do it. It was like motivation for me to, you know, prove him wrong.   Anna: My favorite type of origin story.   Jené: [laughter] Yeah. This is like a theme throughout my life. It's like, if people say I can't do it, I'm like, oh, okay…   Anna: Watch me.   Jené: [laughter] I'm Gonna do it then. Yeah. So I just started commuting to work to work, that's how I got started. I just, you know, just did it out of necessity to start and then it just grew from there.   And then when I moved to Portland, you know, it's like a really big cycling city, so it was really easy to get plugged in. And then I started learning more about Does this bike fit me? Like What kind of gearing works for the riding that I do? and, and things like that. So yeah.   Anna: When did it go from, cuz it sounded like it went from like transit to something you enjoyed pretty quickly with all the sight seeing, but when did it become your thing or one of your things?   Jené: I would say just you start craving it when you don't do it for a while.   Anna: Mmm   Jené: I also did have more community in Portland and I think that definitely helped me like realize it was my thing because it was mostly like women, trans femme, people of color in Portland who rode bikes, which is like a very small community, but they're very empowering and I would just be like, I don't know if I can do this. That sounds crazy. And they're like, yeah, you can. Why don't, why do you think you can't do it? You know?   Anna: Absolutely. So speaking of the bike, tell me about your relationship with it.   Jené: Umm okay yeah it's cream colored. I named it Butter because um.   Anna: Ohhh   Jené: The first time I rode it, I'm like, this is so smooth. Like butter, like -   Anna: Perfect.   Anna: If you were to describe what Butter means to you, how would you describe that?   Jené: [laughter] Um I would say the feeling of like autonomy. Just being able to like leave and go whenever I want to.   Jené: I don't know, it becomes an extension of you when you only have one bike for like everything, you know, your body gets accustomed to it. [laughter]   Anna: I love the idea of like the bike is an extension of you.   Jené: Yeah I mean you really have to be aware and just like aware of your surroundings. And so I'm trusting like my body a lot   Anna: Yeah   Jené: And also my bike to get me through like just to get to the destination. [laughter]   Anna: Oh man. I relate to that in exactly one small way. Cause before this, I was talking to my producer about how, I had an opportunity to get ages ago, um, a motorcycle license and I thought it'd be like a cool thing to do.   And I almost didn't pass the test because to swerve, you have to like throw yourself to the side. Like you're gonna like throw yourself down to the ground.   And then like yank it back up. And so you can kind of like jump around whatever you're swerving around. And like I did not have that trust.   Jené: Yeah   Anna: I did not have that trust in myself to pull myself back up. I did not have trust in the bike to not just like—poooffffff   Jené: Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. You have to like lean your way into it. Like you really have to like trust. Your capabilities and the capabilities of the bike too, to just like get through these situations.   But I don't know. It's like when you, um, do something kind of scary or dangerous and then you make it out and you're like, oh, okay. Like I know, um, I know that wasn't as bad as it looked or at least like I know a little more about how to, you know, handle the bike better next time. So I feel safer. That's a good feeling.   Anna: I love that. So it's — now I'm just like Oh, you grow with your bike! I get, I get like, feels about like literally anything.   Jené:  [laughter]   Anna: So, don't mind me just sitting here, like with heart eyes. But let's talk about care then.   Like how do you care like how do you take care of your bike?   Jené: Okay. Well, I mean like there's normal bike maintenance, right? Like you take it to the shop, you just make sure like the chain is looped up and all the, you know, components are working right.   But I think  part of taking care of it is like trusting other people to take care of it.   Anna: Mmm   Jené: Like having relationships with these bike shops, so basically when they see the bike, they already know they're like, oh, that's Jene's bike. And I think that's, like having that relationship established can help with the care process, if that makes sense.   Anna: Yeah. Totally. And I'm like metaphorical, cuz if we're talking about, you know, taking care of, um, like things to take care of ourselves, trusting other people to take care of us too.   Jené: Yeah. yeah.   Anna: Absolutely.   Anna: What does it what does it look like to travel with the bike? Does that require different maintenance?   Jené: Yeah I mean I basically have to deconstruct the bike, so I have to like take the wheels off, like un- unscrew a lot of parts so that they can break apart essentially. And then they fit all snug in my bike bag. Um, and then I'll put it back together once I get to wherever destination I'm at.   And if I can, I'll try and get like a tune up or just have a bike friend look at it just to make sure everything's running smoothly.   So , but it's like, it is crazy. Like it's taken — it's broken apart essentially. I put it together myself and then I'm like, all right, here we go.   And just [laughter] you have to like trust that all the screws are tightened and everything to start riding so   Anna: Totally so when you're like breaking it down and putting it back together so much, is that a ritual that you enjoy or is it more kind of just something you have to do when you're traveling?   THEME MUSIC   Jené: Yeah I like it. It's like very empowering to be able to take it apart and put it back together and then just start riding immediately.   Anna: After the break, we talk more about how Butter and Jené care for one another.   MIDROLL   Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring. I'm Anna Borges. Before the break, we were talking to cyclist Jené Etheridge about her relationship with her bike and how taking care if it helps build a sense of trust in herself. Let's dive back in.   THEME MUSIC OUT   Jené: Yeah  feel like when I first moved to Mexico city, um, I didn't know anyone at all.   Anna: Mm.   Jené: When I got there, it was January, 2021. So we were like still in like pandemic, deep pandemic mode.   Anna: Oh and moving to a new place during a pandemic too. Ugh.   Jené: It was, it was so quiet.   Anna: Yeah   Jené: It was my second time in Mexico city, but it was, I remember I was just happy to be there because it was sunny and being from Portland in January, there's no sun.   Anna: No. Gray skies forever.   Jené: Yeah. Yeah. And so, um, I mean, I was kind of lonely. I would just kind of ride a lot, uh, in the beginning and   Anna: Yeah like what was your relationship to your bike like at the time?   Jené: So I moved there for six months in the beginning and for some reason I didn't bring my bike.   Anna: [gasp]   Jené: I don't know why.   Anna: Oh my god   Anna: You were separated from Butter.   Jené: Yeah. And so being reunited, I was like, oh my God, this is like the best feeling. Nothing feels like your bike when you're riding, like it's just completely different.   And, so it was just nice to finally have that and like be reunited and be able to take care of it and like, make sure everything was up and running smoothly.   Anna: I love – and like something familiar when you hadn't found your people yet in a new city.   Jené: Yeah, Totally.   Anna: Oh I love that   Jené: Yeah. Yeah. It was super fun.   Anna: We were talking about how, um, just like the concentration that is required to be on a bike is probably the closest thing that I will get to meditation because then I can't be in my head, you know?   Cause I have to like think of what to do and how not to die. Maybe that's a dramatic way of thinking of it, but —   Jené: Mm-hmm yeah. I feel that for sure.   You can really be out of your head when you're riding. Like I would say a lot of the, you know, the to-do list and every day small things kind of just, you can't be thinking about it cuz you're riding. Sometimes we're riding for like hours, but then you start kind of getting into this more meditative mode that's like just reflecting on things on like a deeper way, because you have less distractions.   Like you can't be really looking at your phone, uh, once you get out of the city and you're just riding, you know, know on more secluded roads, you're really just like with your thoughts.   And then also you, you get really close to the people that you ride with because you're talking for literally hours.   Anna: I did enter, you know, with a hypothesis around taking care of things, being, you know, good for our mental health and I'm — how much do you relate to the idea that taking care of something can benefit your mental health? Like does that resonate with you?   Jené: Yeah and it's like, I put it through a lot, you know, like we'll be just going on these trips in Mexico. You know, we take charter buses and you just have to put it in the back in the back of the bus or under the bus with all those suitcases and stuff.   And so you're like kind of risking a lot or when I'm doing gravel rides, like you're just riding through this crazy terrain   Anna: Mmmm.   Jené: And maybe falling because that just happens like when it's rough terrain.   And so being able to like to bring it back to life or just like, you know, travel with it and then get back home and be like, okay, Butter. I know I just put you through a lot.   Anna: [laughter]   Jené: We're gonna go to the shop, make sure everything's good to go.   And then, you know, to be able to do that is nice. Um, and yeah, you're just like, you know, building a relationship in some way.   Anna: I love that so much. I'm like grinning like an idiot.   Anna: One thing I did want to ask, does your bike take care of you in any ways?   Jené: I mean yeah It challenges me every time I ride it.   Anna: Yeah   Jené: I'm like focusing on making myself stronger.   So yeah. At the time, yeah, Am I suffering? Yeah. Yeah. It definitely sucks.   But most of the time I feel great after the ride, you know, and I never regret going, um, unless I crash or something but [laughter] yeah.   I would say like, it takes care of me just through challenging myself and I'm having to trust this machine to get me like hundreds of miles sometimes to a destination.   So that definitely feels like care cuz I guess it's the medium to, to travel and to get to the destination, um, in a way that's like a little more intimate than taking a plane or a bus.   Anna: [laughter] Yeah. I don't think I ever wanna think of taking a bus as intimate in my life.   Jené: [laughter]   Anna: But uh, thank you so much for sharing and for having this whole conversation with me and letting me pick your brain about your bike.   Jené: Yeah of course   Anna: Thank you so much for, for chatting with me today. I almost want to get a bike, but probably won't be.   Jené: No, I think you should.   I mean, to each their own, like I said, but, um, I would recommend it definitely to anyone who just like, wants to get outta their comfort zone, explore places that you would never see by car, by train, by horse even [laughter]   Anna: Absolutely. I'm sure there are plenty of listeners who are like absolutely. Actually going to go out and do this.   Jené: But like, fuck the horse. I'm gonna get a bike.   Anna: [laughter]   Jené: [laughter]   Anna: When I think of how empowered Jené described feeling by her ability to take care of her bike, I couldn't help but think of that like oft-repeated idea that you can't care for others until you care for yourself. And I know that's true in some ways but in a lot of ways I know so many of us who have the opposite experience too. Like, taking care of other things teaches us to take care of ourselves. Or you know, at least inspires us to.   My cats remind me to take care of myself all the time—just last month, I remembered I was due for a visit to the doctor because little Francis needed to see the vet. And I was like oh I guess I need to see the vet too. The people vet.   Meanwhile, one friend of mine always remembers to hydrate when she's watering her plants and then another pours themself into like keeping their Jeep in pristine condition whenever they're feeling like out of control or overwhelmed.   All of that is to say, I like wouldn't be surprised if you already have things in your life that you take care of, even if don't really think about it that way.   So if you're up for it, I have a challenge for you. Actually, hey, a challenge for us—I think I could probably use this right now, too. Alright. Let's think of something we've taken care of, past or present. Like pet, a friend, a plant, an inanimate object, a space, anything. Whatever it is, let's take one small way we've shown that something care or love or tenderness and offer it to ourselves, too.   I'll report back what I wind up doing on Twitter and Instagram—my handles in the credits per usual. Meet me there and tell me what you tried. I look forward to hearing all about it.   Until next time, everybody take care. Quite literally take care. Of something. Ah…   THEME MUSIC   Thanks for listening to Mood Ring, a production of APM Studios and Pizza Shark. We're a new show, so it really helps if you rate, review and share this episode with your friends.   You can even tag me if you're really into it — I'm @AnnaBroges on Twitter – that's Anna B-R-O-G-E-S … because Anna Borges was taken. We want to hear from you. You can get in touch at Moodringshow DOT ORG and click “Contact Us.” Or follow Mood Ring Show on Twitter and Instagram. You can also call and leave us a message at 833-666-3746.   Mood Ring was developed by Kristina Lopez. Our executive producers are Maria Murriel, Isis Madrid and Beth Pearlman. Our story editor is Erika Janik. Mijoe Sahiouni is our digital producer. This episode was produced by Isis Madrid. Our technical director is Derek Ramirez. And as you know, I'm Anna Borges and I write, host and produce this show too.   APM Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. And finally, our music is by Mat Rotenberg.   Thanks again for listening, and I hope to see you next episode!   THEME MUSIC FADE OUT

Host Anna Borges speaks with poet Nichole Perkins about doing things without the expectation for excellence. They speak about Nichole's new painting hobby and how her confidence in writing poetry is fueled by her creative license to be a hobbyist painter.  Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark!  Full Transcript Anna Borges: Hey everyone! Pop quiz for you. When you discover a new hobby that you're really enjoying, do you:   A. Strive to improve so you can be really good at it. B. Brainstorm ways to monetize it because hey, if you have to make money, you might as well have fun doing it C. Stress about other things you should be doing instead of indulging in said hobby or D. Just..en…joy? Enjoy it? Wait, some of you can actually do that?   Hey,  I'm Anna Borges, and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings—even when you feel like you can't relax and enjoy yourself.   Today, we're talking about the importance of no strings attached hobbies. You know, activities that don't have to be productive or impressive or useful and even something you're good at. Hobbies that don't have to be anything other than…enjoyable.   But a lot of things can get in the way of actually enjoying them, whether baking to relax turns into stressing about getting an Instagram-worthy loaf of bread or you get stressed out when you don't discover a secret hidden talent the first time you pick up a paintbrush. You know if you're anything like me that's exactly what I do! Letting ourselves relax and be free to do something without the expectation of a performance or an end goal is hard. Even more so when the something we love overlaps with what we do for a living.   That's where the no strings attached hobby comes in.   Today's guest is Nichole Perkins, a writer, poet, and the host of the podcast This is Good for You, where she helps people stop feeling bad about the things that they love to do.   I also wanted to talk with her because as a creative, I assume she got the struggle of the work-hobby balance well. We dug into the beauty of trying things that we aren't good at and how we can still enjoy our hobbies, even if they do come with strings attached, like overlapping with what you do for a living.   Anna: Can I start by hearing something that you're bad at? Like something that you were just like awful at, but that you love?   Nichole: Oh, um, so I recently started trying to figure out, um, acrylic painting, abstract acrylic painting. I don't know what I'm doing. I really don't know what I'm doing. I cannot draw a straight line. I cannot, I have never been able to perfect, um, a winged, you know, liner look because I cannot, I don't know what I'm doing. So that's something that I know that I am bad at, and I would never like really share that work with anybody because it's so bad, but it's also been really relaxing for me.   Anna: I love that so much. so I have to ask, cause I feel like there are like two camps of people, largely there are people who can do that and enjoy that. And there are people and I'm in this camp who will do that and be like, this is gonna be like relaxing. I'm not gonna like pressure myself to be good. And then I still am like, but what if I want this to be good? Then I wind up in the boat of like Googling art lessons and oh my God, how do I get better at this blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So like, are you, are you in one of those camps, have you felt the pressure to become good now that you've started?   Nichole: Yes, absolutely. Because there was like this one tutorial on YouTube that was like, you know, easy beginner thing and it was the sunset and it's supposed to be with, uh, power lines and beautiful trees and maybe like a little shadow of a house, right. And I tried to draw the power lines and I was just like, oh yeah, this is not, I can't do this. And I mean, I ended up kind of being still pleased with the results of what I had done, because it actually still looked like a purposeful painting. But I do want to get to a point where it looks really good, but I am still very  intimidated about trying to go, you know, find actual lessons or something like that, because I feel like I'm still very childish with, with, you know, learning this thing and I don't want to be in a classroom or whatever, you know, a workshop environment where there are people who are like, oh yeah, I used to draw, but then I stopped and now I'm back and they're like, you know.   Anna: Or they're like, I'm so bad at this. And then you look over and you're like, excuse me, if you think that's bad, don't look.   Nichole: Yes!   Anna: But that's the thing is like you, I want the natural talents. I wanna be naturally good at things like I don't want to have to work to be good at things.   Nichole: Yes. That's exactly my problem as well. So there are a lot of things, a lot of hobbies that I will try or say, I'm gonna try. And then I get frustrated because I'm not good at the first attempt. And… I really have to sit and think to myself, there are very few people who are, you know, experts at something the first time they pick it up. Like, yes, there are prodigies and all that kind of stuff. But the people that I admire on a creative level, they all had a natural talent, but they still have to practice and practice and practice and practice, you know. Like I love Prince, you know, he had natural talent, but he had to learn everything that he did and learn how to combine all of that, all of his musical skills, all of his lyricism into creating the legacy that he has now. Um, the same with like the writers that I admire. Yes, there's some, there's some natural affinity to it, but they still have to learn.   Anna: And how do you remind yourself of that? Do you have to actually give yourself the Pep talk as you're doing it?   Nichole: I do. I have to, I have to like say okay, practice, practice, practice. It's okay. I know that this is not something that I can make a living at or that I want to make a living at. So it's okay. If it is not perfect or consumable.   Anna: Why did you pick something that you're taking classes for then or not classes, but at least like watching YouTube videos?   Nichole: But I still want to like see satisfaction in my own improvement. I just wanna be able to like sit and do it without feeling the pressure of performance or like I said, that end, that end goal.   Anna: Absolutely.   Nichole: But you know, with writing, obviously that's very different, writing is something that, um, has been a part of my life for a very long time and I've always known I wanted to make a career out of it. And I just didn't really know how, um, because there's so many different ways that you can become a writer or, or make a career out of writing. I still have a lot of goals that I want to accomplish. So that's, that's more when I freeze up and let, like, I don't think I'm a perfectionist, but that fear of someone seeing my mistakes or seeing the worst of what I can do. Um, really like puts me in a choke hold sometimes.   Anna: Absolutely. Yeah. Oh, I can't wait to dive into all the writing stuff because selfishly love writing, love, love talking, writing, and art. Can you kind of, I don't know, this is a big question, but like kind of tell me a little bit more about your like current relationship to writing? Cause I know for so many of us it's work, it's like therapeutic, it's fun, it's creative, it's personal. It's like all of these things that are like seemingly at odds for each other. And I'm curious what it is kind of right now for you.   Nichole: Right now it is 90% work and then 10% just personal creativity and that personal creativity usually is my poetry. I have published a poetry book. So that was very much a goal of mine. I still, I, and I have other poetry that I would like to publish one day, but right now what pays the bills is culture writing. You know, writing books, script writing for podcasts, um, and that kind of thing. And I hope to eventually get into, um, screenwriting for film and television. Um, and I just, I want to ultimately continue to write until my dying breath. Anna: I can't lie, some days, it's harder for me to really have fun writing, thanks to how much I associate it with work. After the break, I explore poetry as a potential no-strings-attached hobby and we talk more about how to protect our favorite activities from outside pressures like work. MIDROLL Anna: Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring! Before the break, I was talking with Nichole Perkins about why it's so helpful to have hobbies that don't overlap with what we do for a living. Next up, I may or may not have asked for an impromptu poetry lesson. Anna: One of the reasons that I was so excited, um, to talk to you specifically is because growing up, I used to write a lot of poetry and I never had aspirations to do it professionally. It is just, poetry is what I associate with like playful writing, exploratory writing, me writing, all this kind of thing. And so when I started thinking about, Ooh, what can I dig up for this episode? Poetry did come to, come to mind. Oh. And so I'm, I'm kind of curious if I like asked if, like, if I asked you to just write a really God awful poem right now, like where would you start?   Nichole: Oh, well, for me, it, that would be, um, a rhyming poem. Um, and not just like in iambic pentameter, like I, I do try to do like, um, um, inside rhymes or, you know, that kind of thing. Try to switch up the, you know, where the rhyme falls, but rhyming poetry has always just escaped me. Um, and I am not good at it. So if I were to try to write something that I would consider bad, it would be rhyming. Um, and making sure that like I threw in the moon…   Anna: I do love me some moon imagery, sorry, poets.   Nichole: Right, all poets love the moon, right.   Anna: And so who doesn't love the moon? Love my girlfriend, the moon   Nichole: So that's where I would probably, probably start.   Anna: Why I, I think I find poetry so alluring as like an outlet like this is because I don't know what makes a good poem. Like I will read a poem and I like it, you know, or I won't like it, but that never makes me think this is a good poem or bad poem because it is like so much more subjective to me. I mean, like, I know all writing is subjective, but I'm just, don't have an ear for poetry. And so like, not knowing what good is, is like freeing to me because I can't strive for it.   Nichole: That's really interesting. Cuz for a lot of people who dislike poetry, part of that is because when we're in school and we're learning poetry, it is hard to say what is good and what is bad… and so it's hard for them to understand. Like what made, you know, like, [laughs] if I put this in a paragraph form, would it still, would it still have the same emotional hit? Would it still provide the same satisfaction as seeing it in its whatever format, whether it's a sonnet or, you know, um, really short broken lines, whatever. Um, so people get really frustrated cuz you, you, when you say, what is a poem? And you say, you know, it's, it's writing in verse. Well what's a verse? This, you know, short blocky paragraphs, like. Okay, well why can't we just put it in a paragraph? Why can't we just, you know, make it a, a story as opposed to a poem? And it's like, you can, you can. And the way that poetry just constantly changes. No one poem really looks like the other, um, it freaks people out because people like structure, people like rules. And one of the first things you learn about poetry is yes, this is what a sonnet is, but you can also play with the rules a little bit and change the format of a sonnet, but still call it a sonnet. And that gets people really frustrated, um, about, about poetry, right. Um, because you know, there, there are formats defined formats and then poets go in and just change them all the time. It's frustrating.   Anna: So when you're like specifically in the, kind of like that 10%, um, that you mentioned where it's like really just for you writing, like maybe you'll hope to publish someday, but it's your time? How much are you worried about it being good versus not good? Just like for you?   Nichole: Um, this is gonna sound really…   Anna: No…   Nichole: I feel like it's always good.   Anna: I believe it.   Nichole: It sounds really cocky but…   Anna: No, it doesn't own it. I, I, I mean, that is why you're a poet.   Nichole: I feel so much more confident in my poetry, and when I write, when I get to a final draft of that poem, I'm just like, yes, this is, this is really good. Um, and the only time that I start to doubt myself is when I start thinking, should I submit this someplace? Because that is when I feel like…   Anna: I mean, all of those trying to anticipate reactions, that's when it starts.   Nichole: Exactly. Because it's like, when I'm submitting the poem, it's not just me, my, my poem. It is against all the other submissions that are maybe dealing with more, more political topics, more cultural, uh, culture based topics or, um, you know, things like that. And so me writing about, you know, a piece of fruit may not hold up as well against a poem where someone is talking about traumatic events, you know, or something like that. Which is not to say that that poem should not be considered better than mine. Like it can be, it might be. Um, but it's just a matter of like, well, now my poem has moved from the context of my journal, into the context of the world. Can it stand up against, you know, whatever else the editors are looking at, you know, whatever else the readers are looking at.   Anna: It has to be something.   Nichole: And so I feel when I sit down and, and write it, I feel very, yeah, just assured of myself in, that feels good. It feels good to be able to approach a creative talent with confidence. And so I try to give myself room to move from terrible painting [laugh] to really good poetry or, you know what I hope will be really good fiction. Anna: Yeah. Do you have any advice for people who I don't know, whatever they try and keep as like their protected space, whether that's from like trying not to monetize a hobby or not trying to like worry about being good at something like, other than just really reminding yourself of that. Do you have any advice for protecting that space or like keeping that attitude? Nichole: I think in this day and age, I would say try not to feel compelled to share, right. Because I think that is when we freeze up, when we think, okay, I'm gonna try this new thing and I'm gonna document it on my Instagram or I'm trying this new thing and I'm gonna send pictures to the group chat, like whatever. You don't have to. I mean, it's not to say you have to keep it private or secret. But if you're able just to hold onto it for yourself and I think that's an overall problem that a lot of people have is feeling like you cannot keep anything to yourself. You have to share. It is a proof of your love to your partner, to your parents, to, you know, your audience or whatever that you're like, I'm giving you all of me, I'm trying to be transparent and that kind of thing. Again, that does not mean you're keeping secrets and hiding it and like, whatever. It's just a matter of, you can hold onto something for yourself. It's okay. It's not a betrayal to your, to your relationships, whatever they may be. If you hold onto something until you're ready to share it, you know? Anna: That's so underrated. Yeah. I feel like as someone who is pretty recognizably, a perfectionist or type A usually at like work or whatever, I find I have a really hard time explaining that sometimes keeping things to myself is for me, you know what I mean? That's not me being a perfectionist. That's me protecting myself for my perfectionist habits. Nichole: Yeah. And, and in my, um, friendships, sometimes I don't talk about like career opportunities or whatever. And I think, you know, my friends get a little upset with me when I finally do make the announcements or like share, like, why did you tell us about this before? Or why am I finding out about this, you know, from the announcement on social media? And it's like, it's not that I am hiding it, but I'm also just trying not to jinx it, you know? And that's definitely a trauma response for me where I have talked about something too soon and it's gone away, whether it was a relationship, you know, like, oh, I'm talking to this guy, things are going great. And then, he disappears and I'm like, Ugh, now, now it's gone. And that it's a little bit like perfectionism because it's, um, there is a fear of failure. I don't, I don't wanna talk about this thing because I'm afraid I'm gonna fail at it. I don't wanna talk about this guy that I'm feeling because I'm afraid it's gonna fail. It's, it's not gonna be a success. I don't wanna talk about this career opportunity because I am afraid that it's gonna fall through. And then you know, this, it'll be a rejection of me. Um, you know, I don't wanna talk about learning how to paint because what if I abandon it because I never get good at it. And then you keep asking me about painting and I'm like, I had to stop because I was a failure. Anna: No one ever asked Nicole about painting. If you listen to this episode, do not ruin this for her. I will be so mad at you. Thank you so much for, for chatting. I could have continued chatting about this kind of stuff for forever, honestly. Nichole: Thank you for having me on.  Anna: I thought I had a pretty good grasp on what made a good no-strings-attached activity for me. I knew it had to be fun to do badly, so I wouldn't get all perfectionist about it. And I knew I couldn't feel pressured for it to be something, like something I'd be tempted to monetize. But I hadn't really noticed the theme before: We need things that are just for us. It sounds simple, but it's easy to forget all the ways we're always sharing our time and attention and…well, ourselves. We multitask or document on social media or try to kill two birds with one stone with side hustles. And that's how we forget to create space for things like fucking up or being weird or creating without a goal in mind. So there's magic in keeping some things for ourselves to enjoy, no strings attached. I'd ask you to share your own no-strings-attached activities, but since I just told you to keep it for yourself, how about this: Whatever it is, why do you love it and how do you protect it? Let me know and I'll see you next time. CREDITS

Host Anna Borges talks with therapist Latisha Taylor Ellis about the benefits of group therapy during times of loss. Ellis is the creator of Thank U Next, a virtual therapy group for the brokenhearted. When we feel we have no one else to turn to, does opening up to a room full of strangers help us move through grief? Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark! 

Tumble presents one of our favorite podcasts from RTÉjr Radio: Cereal! Deception, Mystery and so much more in “Cereal” RTÉjr Radio's (not really) True Crime Podcast for all the family. Picture the scene. A brand new TV talent show for kids called “The Novice”. Middle Grade students battle it out to get funding and promotion for their mini company on the national stage. The candidates? Fergus, an ambitious eco-warrior who's invented “The Bog Log” a product that turns your poop into compost for your garden. Xander, a tech whizkid who's dreamt up the “Homework Helper”, an App that literally does your homework for you. Brother and Sister Duo PJ and Clara, forced to enter by their teacher in place of detention, have conjured a colour changing Mood Ring. And Aoife and Katie, best buds for life cooked up the product that gives this podcast it's name. Crunch Ems; a Cereal bar treat that's truly healthy and tastes like a dream. Four perfect products. But all is not what it seems. When the show goes sideways a tale of blackmail and intrigue is revealed. And who better to chart it in his own podcast but 15 year old Rian, runner on The Novice and budding TY podcast presenter. Ryan Tubridy cameos as himself, a veteran broadcast adviser to the young podcast host. And amateur sleuth in his own right. Across 6 episodes Rian takes the listener on a complex journey of discovery to unveil the truth behind the scandal. Find Cereal on on the RTÉ website, or wherever you get your podcasts. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Host Anna Borges speaks with Mood Ring producer Georgina Hahn about her concept of Lamby. They explore the unique way of being tender, supported by a conversation on inner child work with writer and mystic Bernice Angoh. Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark! 

Host Anna Borges talks about her past with an affinity for personality tests. Myers-Briggs, Enneagram, Buzzfeed quizzes, you name it. Our guest Saeid Fard is the CEO and founder of Anna's latest obsession: the personality test app, Dimensional. Can personality tests help us improve our lives and mental health? Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark! 

Host Anna Borges shares her secret past of being a Tumblr fitspo influencer and unpacks women-targeted diet tips with Good Enough cookbook author Leanne Brown. Anna and Leanne chat about owning our food choices to stop judging ourselves and reframe nourishment. You can find information on Leanne Brown and all her cookbooks on her website. Hey Mood Ring listeners, we want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark! 

Host Anna Borges (The More Or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care) hears from listeners about their relationship to money, whether it's colored by guilt or generational shadows. Then, Anna has a chat with Mood Ring producer Jordan Kauwling about her recent reflections on how money has shaped her life—and her relationship to work. We want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark!  Full Transcript Anna Borges: There was a time when I was constantly debating quitting my job. If you've been with us here since the beginning of Mood Ring … you may remember a work-related breakdown I had on the shower floor? Yeah, that was this job. So week after week, I would go back and forth debating about whether or not I wanted to quit without anything lined up for the sake of my mental health.   Because here was the thing: I could. I could do that. I grew up with a lot of financial instability, so savings has always been really important to me. And by that point in my life, I was in a privileged enough position that I could afford unemployment for a couple of months if I wiped out my savings.   But, I just couldn't get myself to do it. Like, sure, yeah money could buy me freedom from a job that was making me cry every time I woke up and faced the thought of yet another day. But money was also buying my health insurance and rent and security and peace of mind and all of the things that I needed to buy in my life. And, I mean, I'd experienced what it was like before without a financial safety net. And I didn't know what would be worse, like all the feelings I was dealing with at this job, or all the feelings that came with losing that security?   Which is all to say, oh my god, there are a lot of feelings to be had around money. The stress of the things we do to make it. The decisions we have to make about spending it. The shame of having it, the guilt of not having it. The attitudes we've adopted about it or inherited.  I mean, grappling with privilege or changing financial circumstances. Just overall how money, or lack thereof, can make us feel vulnerable. Or judged. Or obligated. Or a million other emotions.   THEME MUSIC   Anna: I know that's something I say a lot on this show: things make us feel emotions. But…man [sighs].   That's the thing: No matter where we're at financially, there are always new feelings to wade through or new ways for our money baggage to show up.   So yeah, maybe money could help my mental health in one way, but there was always another problem that needed money thrown at it. So how much was money really helping my mental health?   I mean, a lot. A lot. Money helps my mental health a lot, and it would be bullshit to pretend otherwise.   But it's still not that simple.   I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings—both the feelings you can put a price on and the feelings you can't.   Every episode, we'll explore one new way to cope — with our feelings, with our baggage, with our money baggage, with our brains, and with the world around us.   Anna: Today, we're talking about money and how sometimes it can buy—maybe, not happiness, exactly, but a whole lot of stuff that supports our mental health. Like, not just in big ways, like access to mental health care and being able to meet our fundamental needs, but also in small ways. You know, like, the ability to buy things like time, energy, and support in the form of things like…child care and meal delivery and time off work and all of these little things that support our ability to feel, like, slightly more well.   We wanted to tackle this topic by hearing from you about your relationship with money and kind of the connection between money and mental health and how you experience it. And your responses, you know, made the heart of the episode super clear, and it's that unpacking our relationships with money and all our feelings about it is key to understanding the role it plays in our mental health. For better AND for worse.   Maybe you'll recognize yourself in some of today's stories, and maybe you won't, but the point is to get to know your own story. You know, because this shit is complicated, and we have to meet ourselves where we're at with lots of compassion.   Alright, so without further ado I just want to dive right into some of the stories we got from our listeners.    Kevin: My mismanagement of money has gotten me in a heap of trouble at home with my spouse. Spending beyond my means and really had to curb the amount of dumb shit that I buy, which has been helpful because I'm able to talk myself out of making purchases now and say, “You know what? That's not going to help me. That's not going to make me feel less depressed or less terrible. So I don't need to do it.” And yeah, when you don't have a lot of money it's fucking stressful. Because you're worried about how you're going to make it to the next paycheck. You worry about spending your money on the wrong things. You worry about just like having enough to take care of an emergency if something comes up. Yeah, it's, it's, it's rough when you're already struggling enough as it is, tossing in thinking about finances and how poorly you handle them and poor decisions that you make and how people are disappointed with you when you piss away your money on dumb shit. That doesn't make you feel any better. It makes you feel a lot worse and that's, that is a one-way ticket to couples therapy.   Anna: Okay, raise your hand if our listener Kevin just echoed your internal monologue. We can judge ourselves SO harshly for how we spend our money—even if we're doing it in the name of just trying to feel better.   At the same time, feelings hold information—and like Kevin and our next listener Ronald point out, sometimes they can help us figure out whether or not money is actually doing what we want it to do.   Ronald: I don't know if, you know, ordering food on UberEats makes me happy. I don't think it makes me happy. It makes me like satiated, for sure, but I don't, I don't know if participating in a system that is exploitative is necessarily nourishing for people either.   Anna: I don't know that anyone really knows that. I mean I don't! How do we even begin to untangle all the ways self-care has gotten wrapped up with consumerism, and all of the sticky, tricky ethical and human questions that come with it?   A similar theme that came up a lot? Guilt related to our financial circumstances.   Harper: I have immense financial anxiety that is disproportionate to my circumstances. And I have a lot of I guess like financial survivor's guilt about that. About the fact that I have all these resources and yet I still feel so unsafe and I feel so guilty that I have this much when others do not. I also have a lot of child of immigrants' guilt around it because my family came from so little, they gave me so much. And whenever I am unable to succeed it feels like I am failing multiple generations. When I was a kid a hate crime happened to my family and we were able to move and that was because of the way that my parents had made their financial choices and the financial standing that they were in, that they were able to do that. So that's just really emblematic, I guess, of what money has meant to my family. When I, when I got laid off from my first job, I had had a lot of money saved because saving was always really important to me, and I felt really confident because I also had a really great resume full of great internships and good experience and I felt like it would be a couple of months and then I'd be fine. And then that ended up not being the case and thus began the major financial trauma of my life which is that I had spent several years after that being unemployed, underemployed or fully employed at places that were really abusive. And so I burned through all of my savings and then I had to rely on my parents after that. I felt like “wow, there is no amount of money that I can save that will ever keep me safe.” Anna: Like I said at the top of the episode, that point about safety is so important for me, too, and for so many of us. And when we start to feel like no amount of money will keep us safe, what are we supposed to do with that?   I mean, I wish we had answers, but in talking to people in our circles and hearing from our listeners, sometimes we have no choice but to just kind of…keep on trying to make it work the best we can.   Ronald: You know I am the child of immigrants. My parents kind of came here via the Refugee Act of 1980. And I think for a lot of those immigrants you kind of navigate poverty the best way you can, usually by like leaning on the community that you … you're living in and your fellow immigrants and then you find a way to kind of straddle, class straddle into the middle class. And that, you know. My mom is a CNA at a nursing home. And I would say, you know, my aunt works in the medical field. My dad was a respiratory therapist. And so, you know, you kind of do what you can to survive and then you find a very steady work where you're usually like … taking care of dying rich people.   Harper: I feel like all I've ever wanted to be able to do is three things: I wanted to have enough money to be safe, I wanted to have enough money to have a decent margin of error for when I made the wrong choice, not just for when circumstances screwed me over, and I've always wanted to have enough money to be able to be generous. That's really all I want, and I have been able to do those things at different points in my life, but I really don't feel like I'll ever have enough to truly be safe. And that scares me.   Anna: That scares me, too. A lot. I feel like these days, I can't open Twitter or talk to my friends or anything without hearing jokes about the shitty existence under late stage capitalism—and those jokes are funny, but beneath those jokes, beneath all of them, all I hear is genuine fear that money won't ever NOT define our lives. Whether it's not being able to afford your basic needs or staying in shitty jobs so we can, it's hard not to feel like money is the one thing standing between us and any number of fates. And that's scary—and also not a very satisfying solution, especially when we're usually here to talk about dealing with feelings like fear.   But, I mean, if it were that easy to reach a satisfying conclusion about money and mental health, we wouldn't be having this conversation I guess. Which, yeah okay, not exactly a comfort, but I did promise that we wouldn't try to find easy answers on Mood Ring, so here we are.   Thank you to listeners and friends of the show Kevin, Harper and Ronald for sharing their stories with us for this episode. Like, we know this is some vulnerable shit and we really appreciate it every time you guys share your stories with us so thank you again.   After the break, we'll chat with Mood Ring producer Jordan Kauwling about money and a recent major life decision.   MIDROLL   Anna: Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring. I'm Anna Borges. Before the break we were listening to messages from YOU about the impact that money has had on your own lives.   Next up, is a conversation I had with my producer Jordan Kauwling, and I have some kind of sad news and by kind of I mean very, which that this was actually the last episode that Jordan and I were working on together. Jordan is moving on from Mood Ring and she is going to be so dearly missed for a million reasons that I will not begin to enumerate because then this episode will get very, very off topic, but she has been such an asset to the show and it just so happened to line up that this last episode that we were doing together was a topic that was really really close to Jordan's heart and my heart, and it just seemed like the perfect opportunity to sit down and talk money trauma together. So I'm just going to let the conversation speak for itself.   Anna: When we were developing this episode, I know that it was one that really resonated with you, Jordan. And it also happens to be your last episode. So it does feel perfect in a way for us to have this conversation, but it's also a little bittersweet.   Jordan: Yeah, it's definitely bittersweet. When we had our production meetings and we decided we wanted to do an episode about money, I immediately felt something in my spirit stand up and say, this is an episode that is meant for you to be a part of. So I'm so glad that we're able to have this conversation today.   Anna: And I know so much of your connection to this topic, like at this time and space in the world is related to you going on sabbatical soon. And I, I'm curious actually, cause I feel like we figured out this episode a while ago, did you know at the time, or was it just general money stuff that made your spirit sit up?   Jordan: When we were having this production, this pre-production meeting about money, I was thinking about my godmother. My godmother, I reconnected with her in 2019 … right before the pandemic when I moved back to LA. She lives, she lived in Santa Monica and she unfortunately passed away from cancer in 2020. And so when we decided we were gonna do this episode about money, all I could think about was my godmother, this woman who had worked her entire life to work herself out of poverty and who died penniless. And then it made me reflect on my own life, my own path that I had been on of overwork throughout the pandemic. But to answer your question at the time that we had this meeting, I had no idea that I was gonna need to, that I was gonna need to take a break.   Anna: So would you mind sharing kind of how, I mean you had that realization that you needed a break?   Jordan: Yeah, sure. I, I feel like my body was slowly letting me know that it was time for me to, to take a break. My godmother passing away at the height of the pandemic in 2020, not being able to say goodbye to her other than via Zoom, having to have an outdoor funeral, really instead of taking what happened to my godmother as a message and reflecting on it, that I needed to take a pause in my life, that I needed to stop working so hard and overworking myself. I took it as a message that I needed to work even harder because I never wanted to end up in a similar situation as her. I took, so I, I started working even harder, to the detriment of my own emotional, mental and, and, and physical health. Because again with the pandemic, so many of us were out of work. I felt so much guilt because I was one of the few people in my friend's circle. And in my family circle, who was able to work from home, who was able to continue to work full time and to bring in an income. And so many people around me were not able to do so.   Jordan: So I took on the responsibility of helping people pay utility bills. Helping people pay tax bills, helping people, you know, buy groceries. And so, because I felt like I was privileged enough to continue to work, it pushed me to work even harder until I reached a point where I physically could not work any harder. I emotionally could not work any harder. And I started longing for vacation time. And I realized that, in my life, I've never gone on a vacation. So I started researching, you know, if I were to go on a vacation, where would I go? And I, I fell down this YouTube rabbit hole that eventually led me to the idea of what if you took an extended vacation, and what if that vacation was, you know, not just two or three days or a week's time, what if it was something that was, was restorative to all of the things that have been stripped from you in the past few years?   Anna: The story of your aunt, even though, like I've not had an experience like it, feels so familiar to me because so much of my drive to make money is like avoiding a certain fate that I've witnessed, you know? And like, we don't bring in stuff such as like work life balance and actual like wellness into that conversation. All I knew is I wanted to avoid my parents' financial fate, that's it. Not like I wanna avoid my parents' financial fate and also be like a human who is well and doesn't wanna die. I was just so concerned with the money aspect of it, even through our conversation and listening to, to our listeners who were, who were speaking to this as well, is how much of like, can money buy happiness? When I think like, hell yet can, like, what I'm really thinking is like money can like buy me out of one specific type of unhappiness. But I don't know that I've really considered holistically what money is doing for my mental health.   Jordan: I've, I've come to a place hopefully of peace or of better peace with money. Money can buy happiness. It can buy, buy me time. Hell it can buy my mom a new house, hopefully one day. But you know, money is like water. It flows in and it flows out. But if you're not careful, it can, can drown you. So…   Anna: Holy shit, Jordan! Where did that come from?   Jordan: I don't know! [laughs]   Anna: Clearly there's no easy answer here. I mean, there isn't even a simple question that we were asking. But we knew all that going in.   And I think what stood out to me between Jordan's story, my own story, the stories that we got from Ronald and Harper and Kevin, is we can put so much hope into money. Like, so many expectations on it. And in some ways that's totally right! Money does in a lot of ways bolster our ability to take care of ourselves on a very fundamental level. And we also look to it for security or to avoid a certain fate or to buy things that can ease the burden of life's everyday bullshit. But, I think what's standing out is it can be hard to predict like whether it'll actually do what we need it to do or if it will just cause more problems, literally or emotionally.   Digging into all of the like personal nuances of using money to address mental health is complicated, as we heard from all of you. And… I mean we can make 6 million episodes out of this. But it's a good place to start, you know, like we can unpack our money baggage. We can reflect on the underlying needs that we're trying to address with money and whether money can actually address those needs. Because sometimes, that can lead us to say, “You know? Actually, I won't get what I need from this,” and then we can use it as an opportunity to find something else. Like something better.   But at the same time what do we do when the answer is, “Yeah, money would really help here” and we don't have it? Or our feelings or our histories interfere with our ability to accept that help or use it in that way?   I guess that's when we find ways to soothe and manage the feelings that come with that. And share our stories so we don't think that we're alone in them. And short of that, I'm really holding out on marrying rich.   If you have more thoughts to share on money and mental health, you know we always want to hear from you. Just because the theme of the day is over doesn't mean your stories are over.  So tag me or the show on social, call our toll-free number and leave a message, submit through our website.   And in the meantime, I hope you treat yourself to something nice—whether that's self-compassion or a small purchase that will give you the hit of dopamine when you need it. You know, whichever works.   THEME MUSIC   CREDITS

Host Anna Borges (The More Or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care), who was famously dragged on Twitter after making a few jokes in reference to mental health, revisits mental health meme culture and how it can be a useful tool to find community during dark times. She's joined by Memes To Discuss In Therapy admin Priscilla Eva for a discussion on “shitposting,” finding the humor in our collective struggles and how social media can actually breed compassion for ourselves and for others.  We want to hear what you think about Mood Ring! You can help us out by filling out a short audience survey: moodringshow.org/survey Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Follow Memes To Discuss In Therapy on Instagram or on Facebook.  Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark!  Full Transcript Anna Borges: They say that everyone remembers their first time—I know that I do. Slowly waking up in the morning. Bright light streaming in through the window…   …the sound of my phone rattling on the nightstand as a stream of notifications flooded in.   MUSIC PAUSE, PHONE VIBRATION SOUND EFFECT   Sorry, did you think I was talking about something else? Yeah, no, I'm talking about the first time I got absolutely dragged on the internet.   MUSIC   It was early 2016 and I was a writer at BuzzFeed. I'd been tasked with the challenge of finding a way to make mental health content shareable, and relatable, and viral. And that might sound like a ridiculously easy job in the year of our digital lord 2022, but it wasn't that long ago that the landscape of mental health content looked very different than it does today. Like on big mainstream websites, it was pretty much limited to serious and earnest personal essays and serious and earnest resource articles. And everything else was kind of like… you know… niche. Like it existed, but just in certain corners of the internet.   So, I decided to try doing what I'd long done in my little corners of the internet, I joked about my depression.   And it did not go well.   RECORD SCRATCH, CROWD GASP, YOUNG GIRL SHOUTING “YOU NEED TO LEAVE”   The roundup in question was “21 Tweets About Depression That Might Just Make You Laugh.” A quintessential BuzzFeed list that I thought would make people laugh, and, you know, more importantly, maybe make them feel less alone.   And [laughs] man oh man, was I wrong. Instead, the comments and the emails and the tweets just came flooding in.   SOUNDS OF CROWD JEERING   Anonymous Commenter: “I feel physically sick after reading this. This post is horrible.”   Anonymous Commenter: “You clearly have no experience with depression if you think these are funny.”   Anna Borges: And, and I can't emphasize how mild these tweets were. You know, it was stuff like, “It's not called a nap, it's called a depression sleep.” And like, “I can't wait for my winter depression to end so I can get a start on my spring depression!” Just completely innocuous tweets that you would probably see seventeen of a day these days. And the comments just kept coming.   Anonymous Commenter: “This is disrespectful to people who actually struggle.”   Anonymous Commenter: “You have no business writing about mental health.”   Anonymous Commenter: “Depression isn't funny. Period. It never will be!”   Anna Borges: And I couldn't help but immediately panic and wonder if I'd made, like, some grave mistake. I was like, “Are they right? Was my chosen coping mechanism disrespectful and out of touch? Should I have kept it a shameful secret? What is wrong with me!?”   Was joking about my mental health really so wrong?   MOOD RING THEME MUSIC   I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings…even when some people think your jokes about those feelings are pretty fucked up.   Every episode, we're exploring one new way to cope — with our feelings, with our baggage, with our brain, with the internet or with the world around us.   Anna Borges: Today's episode is about laughing about mental health. Our mental health. Specifically, laughing about our mental health by following accounts we find relatable and making it part of our regular social media diet.   Now to be clear, disclaimer up top, it's totally okay if jokes about mental health don't feel particularly funny to you. What makes us laugh is, you know, an extremely personal thing, especially where mental health is concerned. And far be it for me to try and tell people that they should find my tweets about wanting to die hilarious. It's not for everyone.   All that said, I'm really relieved that joking about mental health on social media is way more accepted than it used to be. Because now, all of my feeds are full of reminders that I'm not alone, and they offer new ways to frame how I think about my struggles. And, I mean yeah,  they make me laugh and laughing is great.   So let's dig into why following mental health accounts is, you know, a small way to show yourself some love. Joining me is Priscilla Eva, who runs one of my favorite mental health accounts, Memes to Discuss in Therapy. And when I say memes to discuss in therapy, I don't mean wholesome memes that would make my therapist proud. I mean memes that would make my therapist like start scribbling a lot of notes.   And by that, I mean total shitposts.   You're good if you're not actually familiar with this whole mental health shitposting thing—the main thing you need to know is that they're the kind of posts that probably seem inappropriate or insensitive or dark from the outside. But when you are in on the joke? It's kind of like finding shorthand for the experiences that you thought no one else understood.So let's dive into my conversation with Priscilla.   MUSIC FADE OUT   Anna Borges: I would love to start by hearing from you, just for people who aren't familiar with the page how you would describe it, just to like anchor, anchor our listeners into like, what the f we're talking about.   Priscilla Eva: It's just a meme shitposting page. And I like to say I specialize in curating and making memes for mental health and chronic illness. Because those are the two things I care about, mental health and chronic illness related things. And, those are the things that I find most resonant and like to share and repost or make memes of.   Anna Borges: So can you give me kind of the origin story of how you started this page, and like what led to it?   Priscilla Eva: So my friend Tyler, they actually started the page about five years ago. And they started it for the same reason, wanted to just basically shit post mental health stuff. [Anna laughs] And it started as a Facebook page that was just, you know, sharing with a few friends. And then they made it public. And so I started helping, about four or five years ago?   Anna Borges: Oh, wow, I didn't realize the page had been alive for so long. I, I feel like a newcomer, like I'm a poser. I'm like, Oh, I've been a long term fan of memes to discuss in therapy. And it's like, oh, no, no,   Priscilla Eva: Our growth only really, I think took off … a little bit before the pandemic started. [Anna: hmmmm] And I think the pandemic did a lot for people, you know, realizing that they maybe had mental health stuff that they wanted to address for just a plethora of reasons.   Anna Borges: It's, it became more mainstream.   Priscilla Eva: Yes. And so then we got even more followers from that. And then, we started the Instagram, so we could cross post. And, that's kind of where we grew to where we are today.   Anna Borges: So before that, what was your relationship with social media like, or was that really when you dove full in?   Priscilla Eva: Actually always had, you know, sort of flirtation ship with social media. I've had my SlyFox persona since high school, which was back in the MySpace days.   Anna Borges: Same, same. I was a scene queen, you know, just being sad on the internet since 2004.   Priscilla Eva: Yeah, so I've had my SlyFox persona since then. And I kind of use it as my, like, online posting alter ego.   Anna Borges: I feel often similarly when I talk about my mental health online. It's like there's how I talk about my mental health with my therapist and my friends, and then how I talk about it with it online and that difference there, but, it's not, so it sounds like you're someone who has always been comfortable on the internet in some way. Like an Internet person.   Priscilla Eva: Yeah, I, oh gosh. I was very into AIM back in the day, the instant messenger. Yes, and MySpace, all that. Had a lot of online friendships. So it's like people I actually know, which is parlayed into what a lot of my relationships are as an adult. There's a lot of people I know from school, college, you know. And now from, like, my chronic illness stuff, different walks of life. People I've met in real life, but we usually only ever talk online because I have my chronic illness stuff like, you know, during the pandemic, since I'm immunocompromised, couldn't go out at all. [Anna: yeah] So, that kind of compounded it. But there's a lot of relationships I have with people that it's, you know, just messaging each other back and forth a few times a week, sending each other memes. And I'm surprised how similar it is to the AIM instant messages I was sending in high school.   Anna Borges: I am so glad that you said that, or so excited that you said that because literally, literally one of the things I was gonna, wanted to just share is that that is how it functions for me. Like my relationship to the memes, specifically, your page is one that I use a lot, is reposting them to stories kind of as an away message. You know, it used to be like emo song lyrics on my aim profile, and now it's like sad memes. And I just kind of like throw it out there to give people visibility into my sadness, so.   Priscilla Eva: Yeah, just kind of like an update as to what's going on or what you're feeling.   Wow. I really can't overstate how massively important platforms like AIM, Tumblr, MySpace… all of that were to those of us who needed a place where we could express in writing or in a safe way things that were really hard to express out loud. After the break, we'll finish up our conversation with Memes To Discuss in Therapy admin Priscilla Eva and dig into how her followers engage with her content. Plus, we'll talk about where darker mental health jokes fit into all of this.   MIDROLL   Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring. I'm Anna Borges. Before the break we were talking about how following mental health memes accounts and posting about things like our mental health and chronic illness has helped an entire community of people find a new way to express themselves and connect. So let's go ahead and finish up our chat with Priscilla Eva. And as a reminder, Priscilla runs the Instagram and Facebook page Memes to Discuss in Therapy.   Anna Borges: Obviously, what we're talking about is how we use these memes to support our mental health or like how they might not be so great for our mental health and that whole relationship. So, in your experience, how do you see how people interact with your page and share or comment or tag their friends? Like what kind of behavior do you see most often?   Priscilla Eva: One thing I absolutely adore about Memes to Discuss in Therapy and our followers is, now the ratio is much higher. It's like 99% of people who comment are really nice, they're supportive, or they're looking for support, you know. It's an interactive thing where we're all helping each other or feeling less alone. There's about 1% of people who are trolling, who are clearly just there to try to piss people off. And those people get blocked and banned immediately. So I try to keep them out of the comments. But, I find it so interesting that once I kind of shifted my, you know, personal posting from my personal SlyFox page, the memes page, still using the SlyFox, you know, me. But, just shifting the lens through, I guess, you know, what I'm letting society look at me as saying, Hey, this is a mental health page, and we're going to be supportive of each other. I still talk about all the same stuff, but it's just, you know, it's just on the top, you know, this is Memes to Discuss in Therapy. And people are a lot more supportive than I have ever found, you know, elsewhere in internet life. And that's pretty freakin awesome. I love it.   Anna Borges: I love that, that both like doesn't surprise me and surprises me, if only because like, I'm kind of cynical. So I'm like, hey, who knows? People can be assholes about anything, including mental health. But, I do think a space where people can have conversations that they don't get to have elsewhere, even on other pages, like I, can be hopefully welcoming for that. How do you see your followers interacting with the memes? And like, if you had to guess the various reasons that people follow these accounts and what they get from them? What would you say based on what you see?   Priscilla Eva: So we get, I have like multiple tiers of interaction we get on both the Facebook page and the Instagram page. There's people who are just liking and sharing and, you know, they never comment or anything. And that's great. If people are liking and sharing stuff, I assume it resonates with them, and that's awesome. That's the whole point. I love it. And then there's a lot of people who will comment and tag friends in their comments or a ton of people who will comment, say, like, Oh, I feel attacked, or if this isn't me, like, just really relating in the comments. And I love, I love seeing that in the comments. Because so often, someone will say, like, Oh, my God, this is totally me. And then you'll see someone comment underneath them saying, I thought I was the only one. There's a lot of stuff too, when I post about like suicidal ideation, or intrusive thoughts, like that's one of those things that our society doesn't like to talk about at all. And when we do talk about it, we have to put big warnings on it and say, This is really serious. We can't joke around about this. And I think for those of us who are at least me, like me personally, who deal with you know, intrusive thoughts or suicidal ideation on a daily basis. It's kind of hard to keep getting, getting the message over and over again, that something that's in your head every day is really wrong and like, something must be bad with you if, you know, you're having these things that pop into your head all the time. And that's another one that people messaged me all the time, or we get comments all the time, of people saying, oh my god, I thought I was the only one. And that's another one that I like to just say, No, you're not.   Anna Borges: Nope. Absolutely. Yeah, this is resonating so much with me because I, I also deal with like, chronic, passive suicidal ideation is how I kind of describe it. And I wrote an essay about it a couple years ago, and still get messages that mean so much to me, for people who are like, I thought I was alone, I didn't feel this way. And I think it's a real gift to be able to joke about it with other people who get it. You know, and so like having these safe spaces where that will not be a red flag for one of my random followers just is so, so invaluable.   I do often wonder, I know that this kind of thing for people who don't speak this language, or who might not follow these accounts and who might not know that you dealt with this before, but now see through your page that you do, like, have you experienced people expressing worry?   Priscilla Eva: I, I personally have always been like very much an open book when it comes to my mental health, when it comes to my physical health. My mom was kind enough in high school, when my parents got divorced, she told all of us kids, like you each have to go see a therapist, I don't care if you go to one session, or if you go to 20 sessions, but like, I want to make sure we didn't break the kids, like, at least go and do just talk to a therapist for one hour. And if you never want to see him again, that's fine. But if you do, like, I'll pay for you to keep going. And she, I remember, she also would tell us, like, you know, one week in therapy at this age is going to be a year in therapy when you're my age. So like, if you feel like doing it, do it now. And so I totally took her up on that. And I did therapy for about a year, going weekly. And that was awesome. When I was, it was like, when I was 16 to 17. And it gave me a lot of coping skills that I think it usually takes most people into their young adult lives, you know, into their 20s or 30s to get, so I was very thankful for that. But because of that I was very open about my mental health, open about my depressive episodes and just open about, you know, what I was going through. And so for me personally, it's like, I don't think I scare anyone, cause they know who I am. However [laughs], I think there are some people that I know who have become more comfortable sharing about their mental health.   Anna Borges: Oh, good!   Priscilla Eva: Just like from interacting with me, interacting with the page, and they have run into that before where some of their like normie friends are like, Oh, are you okay? You're, like, sounding kind of dark or this or that. They're like, you know, I'm just actually exploring these feelings I'm having. I'm like saying them out loud or putting them out there for other people to see, so.   Anna Borges: To kind of switch gears, one thing I did really want to ask is, it's not surprising at all, to me, but still so interesting to hear that obviously, your reach spiked, right around the beginning of the pandemic, when people were speaking this language. So I'm really curious what kind of things in the past two years, what kind of topics you see resonate most with your audience?   Priscilla Eva: One of the big ones that has just like skyrocketed since the pandemic is social awkwardness. Lots of social awkward memes, and lots of social awkward conversations. But people like forgetting how to people because, you know, they only spend time with their roommates or their pets. And a lot of people talking about depression or loneliness that, you know, a lot of people are not comfortable or have not spent time like being by themselves, like, learning how to be a good friend to themselves. We've had a lot more people just talking about weird thoughts. I'd say like, intrusive thoughts, you know. During the pandemic, people are not in the routine of, you know, doing the same thing every day to keep their brain kind of distracted. So I think, like, a lot of weirdness crept in, but a lot of, you know, goodness, too. [Anna: absolutely] And, yeah, it's been interesting and cool to see all different people interact with that.   Anna Borges: What's, what's really striking me, funnily enough, is, as you're walking through the topics, it all sounds so earnest, and like serious and wholesome. But for people who haven't seen the page, these are all topics that are discussed in a really hilarious way, you know, and [Priscilla: yeah!] I wonder if, if you had to sum it up? How, what would you say is like the magic part of exploring these topics, but in like, a hilarious shitposting medium?   Priscilla Eva: The magic part for me is just the accessibility, because I think there's something about humor, especially something about dark humor, that allows us to laugh about things that, like, we're not even supposed to whisper about. And I think it's, sometimes it's that thin wedge in the door to actually open up a discussion about something. And man, I can't tell you how many people I know in real life, how many people I know through the pages, how many, just people who I've talked to who say, you know, I started looking into depression, or anxiety, or OCD, or getting on medication, or dealing with my eating disorder, all this stuff you know, it started with making jokes about it and reposting memes or reposting silly little stories. And I was just joking about it. But then I realized maybe I'm joking about it because it's something I actually care about. But once you allow yourself to laugh about it, rather than be scared about it, it opens up a door that you didn't know was there. And it allows you to, you know, really step in and explore those feelings in a new way. And for me, that's the magical part of it. And I just like the camaraderie too. I love knowing that there, you know, at any given time, I can post something on our Facebook or Instagram. And immediately we'll get responses from all over the world of people saying, yep, me too. [Anna: same!] I also experience that, like it's just nice to know that we are not alone.   Thank you again to Priscilla for talking to me about one of my favorite things. You can follow Priscilla's page if you've decided this is something that could be for you either on Instagram or Facebook at Memes to Discuss in Therapy.   There is one part of my BuzzFeed story that I left out at the top of the episode. Even with all of the negative comments and emails and tweets I was getting about that post, the, you know, 21 Tweets About Depression, there were a lot of supportive ones, too. People who related and who were thankful for the opportunity to see that other people related, too.   They replied to the other commenters and essentially said, “Hey, just because this doesn't work for you doesn't mean it's bad. If you don't like it, if you don't find it funny, don't read it.”   That's the rule of thumb I kind of follow here, too. You know, we have agency to follow accounts that make us laugh and make us feel seen and that give us language to describe our experiences, just like we have the agency to unfollow the ones that make us feel bad and just don't work for us.   So I encourage you to get to know your mental health sense of humor and follow where it leads you, whether it's accounts like Priscilla's, or late night shitposting on Twitter (I tend to do a lot of that if you're not already following me). You know, weird bits on TikTok, specific creators that really get you … whatever genuinely makes you laugh and is a bright spot on your feed, cause there's plenty on social media that is not that, so the more you can feed in, the better.   For those of you who do enjoy laughing about your mental health experience, I'm curious: What are some of your favorite accounts and memes? Because I'm always on the lookout for more. And I would love to get to know your sense of humor as well. So tag us in them, send them our way, check us out on Instagram or Twitter @moodringshow, and I'm looking forward to laughing with you!   You can even tag me if you're really into it — I'm @AnnaBroges on Twitter – that's Anna B-R-O-G-E-S…because Anna Borges was taken. We want to hear from you. You can get in touch at Moodringshow DOT ORG and click “Contact Us.” Or follow Mood Ring Show on Twitter and Instagram. You can also call and leave a message at 833-666-3746.   CREDITS   Mood Ring was developed by Kristina Lopez. Our executive producers are Maria Murriel, Isis Madrid and Beth Pearlman. Our story editor is Erika Janik. Mijoe Sahiouni is our digital producer. This episode was produced by Jordan Kauwling. And as you know, I'm Anna Borges, and I write, host and produce this show too.   APM Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. And finally, our music is by Mat Rotenberg.   Thanks again for listening and I hope to see you next episode.

Host Anna Borges (The More Or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care) is joined by Dr. Renee Lemus and Dr. Christina Rose–hosts of Las Doctoras podcast–about rewriting the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and rewiring the messaging that comes from the world about who we're allowed to be.  Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow  Follow Anna @annabroges Follow Las Doctoras podcast online at lasdoctoras.net.  Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark! Full Transcript Anna Borges: Let's kick things off by reading an old journal entry of mine from freshman year of high school. And I guess that comes with all of the disclaimers that you would expect.   [sighs] All right… I wrote…   I need to get my shit together. It sounds so easy, but why have I always failed so miserably? I don't know how I let myself get so far behind, or why I can't delay instant gratification, or when I got so fucking lazy. I know what I have to do. Why can't I just do it? What is wrong with me?   I know I only wrote that in freshman year of high school because of the date at the top of the page. Because to be honest, like, I've probably written some variation of that a hundred times over in the decade and a half since then. And maybe you have too? Berating yourself for something - for not being good enough, or fast enough, or a million other things. And for me, it was my inability to focus, to accomplish my goals, to function, basically, the way that I thought I should be able to function because it seemed like everyone BUT ME could do it.   It was a recurring subplot in my journals for years.   And then, eventually—like 15 years later eventually—I got diagnosed with ADHD.   THEME MUSIC   [laughs] So…yeah. Which, that cleared a lot of things up in hindsight.   And while I felt some relief at having an explanation, I also felt this, like, sense of grief for this person I thought I knew. Like, how could it be that all of these core beliefs about myself, as unkind as they were, were suddenly just…wrong?   What do you do when you discover you've been an unreliable narrator of your own story this whole time?   Hey friends, what's up?   I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings—even when your feelings about yourself feel like cold hard facts.   Every episode, we're exploring one new way to cope — with our feelings, with our baggage, with our brains, with the world around us. And with the unkind stories we tell ourselves about ourselves.   And today, we're talking about how the stories we've told ourselves about ourselves can burrow their way into our brains and impact our self-worth and even our whole self-concept. And a lot of those narratives come from messages we get about who we're supposed to be, or how we're expected to function, or how our lived experiences fit the mold of what we're told is normal or acceptable or right.   MUSIC   After my diagnosis, I started to wonder, like: how many of us are carrying around stories that we believe wholeheartedly, stories that tell us we're not good enough or smart enough or talented enough or worthy enough?   So this episode is about stories. Stories we tell ourselves and stories others tell us ABOUT ourselves, and how we can do the work to untangle it all.   To help us with all that untangling, I reached out to Dr. Renee Lemus and Dr. Christina Rose. Together, they host the podcast Las Doctoras and run a writing course that seeks to help students decolonize their writing and use storytelling as a form of healing. Through their work, they help people reclaim their voices and rewrite their stories in a way that's authentic to them.   MUSIC FADE OUT   Anna: Dr. Lemus and Dr. Rose, thank you so much for joining me today! I'd love for us to just dive right in and start talking about these narratives that we have about ourselves and where they come from. Specifically, it can be this feedback loop, you know? Of … stories that we've been told about ourselves that we then go on to tell the world about who we are or tell ourselves about who we are. So kind of a big question, but how does the outside world and all of the messages that we receive from it impact our own messaging?   Dr. Lemus: You know we're, we're gender studies professors, right? We're women's studies professors. We're always going to have that feminist perspective on things and add that lens. I think a big, we've always named that a big part of what we do in our classes is to give language to our experiences, right. But I think we live in a world that wants to say that if we experienced oppression, it's our fault. It's something that we did wrong or we didn't do something right. And I think, or, or wants to gaslight our experience and say, no, you didn't experience that. Like, that you're [Anna: yeah] you're just being too sensitive. And so I think we always come in to say, like, to validate that experience and say, yes, you experienced sexism. Yes, you experienced racism. And to give language to things that we already know in our bodies, right. And, and validate those experiences as some, and to know where to place, not the blame, but to place our frustrations. And so I think for us, we, when it comes to our story, we can feel empowered to tell our story, because we know that … we're not the only ones experiencing it and it's not our fault. Right. It's not, it's not a flaw in us that we can't meet every need of our household and our children, because the structures of society don't give us enough support to do those things! Anna: I, I, I work with therapists all day. So like, I'm like putting the answer out there as though I know it, but like, I imagine gaining awareness of these type of narratives and messages that you've internalized has to be this first step, because otherwise, how can you start to rewrite them? And so how, how can we start to gain that awareness?   Dr. Rose: Well we're learning, I think to check in with our bodies, you know [Anna: yeah!] I think our bodies can really tell us those things, you know? I think that, you know, again, that narrative that would have us basically sacrifice ourself for any cause, anything or just, I don't know. For, for labor, for, you know, the common good, for religion, for family and all these things. Really takes a toll on our whole being. And sometimes it is our body that can, can really give us the, the truthful and not like not, or a real, like it doesn't. I say, my, my body doesn't lie. You know, it's like the, the book, that, My Body Keeps the Score or something like that. But if my back hurts, you know, or if my shoulders hurt, like, that's undeniable, it's like, it's kind, it's not like I can, from this air, you know, earthy air perspective, kind of convince myself. I can just think about my feelings, right. We were talking about that too. Like, I actually need to feel them. I need to cry. And that's, so I know when I'm crying or I know when I actually do some things for my body that could be movement. It could actually be like artwork. It could be like meditation, it could be stretching. You know, I think that's, that's where I know I'm doing, I'm taking at least the first step, you know, and when my body talks to me and I listen, maybe that's even the, the, the step before. Dr. Lemus: If we're tired, we're tired. Right. And we're going to, so I, I definitely think it starts with really just a lot of self-reflection. I wanted to say, I think another important part of this is like, where do we start is community. [Dr. Rose: Yes!] Who you [laughs] you, you've surrounded yourself with, because I mean, and, and I would say like, for me, there's different communities, right, that I'm in, and some give me this certain part that I need and this other, you know. But I think again, when you're in academia, right, or in any kind of, let's say mainstream or even corporate or whatever kind of environment that you don't feel is like your safe environment. You need somewhere to feel safe, where you can let go, where you can [laughs] you can call and rant and say, oh my God, I experienced this thing, you know? [laughs] Which is basically what our podcast is, is just about ranting about things. But I think community where you can feel safe, where they can validate your experiences. Where you have very similar values. Where you're invested in the same things and feel supported so that … you're not always having to be productive. Where you can pick up where each other left off. Because I have community, I'm able to validate my experiences more and I'm able to feel empowered in my story more because I'm not being gas- like society's gonna gaslight us all day long. So when you have a community and somebody to say, no, yes, you deserve to rest or you deserve … it's okay that you're angry. Then that just, ugh, it feels like you can, you know, rest a lot more. [Anna: oh!]   Dr. Rose: I just want to name that that's intentional too, like, you know? Just, you know, society, or like the Western framework really wants us to be like an, like a disembodied head that just like, like does stuff, you know, produces things… Anna: …and questions our experience too. Dr. Rose: And also yes. And it wants us to be isolated too. Like, it's, they do wanna create this abusive relationship dynamic where you can't reach out to your community, like you should handle this alone. So I just think those messages are real. And I just wanna, I wanna know, that everyone to know that it's not, you, you know, and, and liberating yourself from that, you know, reaching out and to other people and, and, and to your body is, you know, radical, radical feminism. Anna: It's really stuck with me, the point Dr. Lemus and Dr. Rose make about how these harmful narratives we have about ourselves can fester in isolation. Because I don't know about you, but when I'm alone, I don't stop to question the voice in my head that says I'm defective. I don't think to ask, “Wait, who's voice is that and how did it get in there?” And when those thoughts go unchallenged for long enough, that's when they become part of the story I tell myself about myself. After the break, we'll talk about what it means to rewrite our stories—especially when we've believed a different narrative for so long. MIDROLL Anna: Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring. I'm Anna Borges. Before the break, we were talking to  Dr. Renee Lemus and Dr. Christina Rose about rewriting the self-destructive stories we tell ourselves. Let's get back to it. Anna: I like to say in therapy and like, you know, when we talk about stuff like narrative therapy, for example, which is kind of like the brain process that I, I, I followed for this episode, but. I like to say when my therapist and I talk about doing this kind of exercise of like rewriting my story, I get super overwhelmed, trying to figure out, I'm like, which part of my story, whose story, what, what does rewriting it mean? How do I write my story?   Dr. Lemus: Yeah, this is, this is where, I mean, we would say, this is where ceremony comes in. This is where, writing is the small part of it, right. It's to say, first, you have to be present in your body. Right. So whatever that means to you, whether it's meditation, whether it's dancing, whether it's… doing some art, like, whatever that looks like to you, that it means to be present in your body. Kind of letting go of [Dr. Rose: past] you know, all the other things. Yeah. And just being in the moment. So part of my meditation practice, and part of something that Christine and I do in our courses, in our meditation or our like grounding centering practices is to call in our ancestors, is to call in whatever spiritual guides, you know, you're down with. And, or even calling in our inner child. [Anna: yeah] Calling in our higher self. Right. All of those, all the parts of us that sometimes we forget. Our imagination. Like, that's a big thing that we do in our courses is we think that … [Dr. Rose: Intuition] Intuition, like we think, like kids are so imaginative they're so in their imagination. And then at some point we let that go, cuz we think we have to be realistic. And so we're like, how can we tap back into that? And so it's, it's yeah. It's getting centered, you know, calling in maybe whatever spiritual guides you have. And then just kind of, yeah. I start just asking myself, like, if I was interviewing myself, like, how's it going today? Or, you know, or maybe I am pissed about something and just like ranting. And, and what that does. And again, something else we do in our course, is we do like these warm up writing activities, just write without thinking. And many, I mean, you can, you can look up prompts, online, whatever. And in doing that, it gets those juices flowing. And then what you really want to write about kind of comes through, but it's hard to do that when you're like sitting cold, right. You're like, I'm gonna go write. And you're sitting there and you're like nothing's happening, right. Or I don't know what to do or-   Anna: Or why can't I run this marathon right now? [laughs]   Dr. Lemus: Yeah. And so it's to say like, give yourself grace, you know, it doesn't have to be perfect. Just kind of literally just write anything, anything. Sometimes I will even read something and I'll like rewrite just to have that … that somatic experience of writing something, even if I'm like quoting another book. And then once my body starts getting going, I, my, my voice starts to come out. Dr. Rose: And it doesn't have like an end goal either. Like I was even thinking, you could begin with recording your dreams, you know, in some way [Anna: ah that's a great place to start] You know, cuz I think, or even just listening, listening to your dreams, you know, and waking up and it could be, it could be like a journal. It could be written down or you could just voice memo it, like this is what I dreamed, you know, like that's a beautiful, that's a beautiful space of listening and hearing and listening and writing, you know, recording. Anna: Love that. So we've been talking about writing and now I would like to talk about metaphorically rewriting because for me, like I'm a big journaler and what I, what I've been thinking about a lot lately is when I journal that's often the first time I'm telling my story to myself, you know, it's like seeing my own thoughts in black and white and conversing with myself. And I also like to reread my journals a lot and going back and saying like, oh, okay, like, this is how I thought about this at the time, sometimes it's changed. And sometimes I'm like, oh, that is how I thought about it at the time. And how it's, I've been thinking about it ever since. And like, I would like to rethink about this thing that I was telling myself. And so I'm curious if you have any sort of like, if that shows up in like in your work, in like a literal way too, like how you literally rewrite or retell your stories yourself when you found out that the first one was not the story that you wanted to tell yourself. Dr. Lemus: I think it's just having grace for your own growth. Like grace is such a big theme for us is just like really giving yourself permission to just be where you're at now. I, that's what I tell my students. I say, wherever your relationship is with, you know, whatever, like the world it's, you know, it's not gonna always be like this. It's going to evolve. It's going to change and that's okay. You know, even your identity, right? Your relationship with your identity, that's gonna change. That's going to evolve. Nothing is stagnant. And so I think just giving yourself grace for what your story used to be. And, and, I was telling some of my students cuz we were rounding up the semester and they were like, oh I think I'm too confrontational. Cuz I, I'll call people out on too much. And I'm like, I'm too much. Anna: Oh, big narrative I see a lot. Dr. Lemus: And I tell them one, you're not too much. Two, I said, I was like that when I was in my twenties and I am much more discerning now of where I put my energy, but I am so grateful to my 20 year old self for being so confrontational with people because it allowed me to set boundaries. So I think it's like, yes, I have evolved. But I'm also really grateful for those times, those things that I did, or even those stories that I would tell myself because it helped me to, to evolve, right. Those, because I got those stories out of me, then I was able to like make room to process and grow. Anna: What's so funny is that's I think the process I go through when I reread by journals, you know, I think, I think of my past self in a certain way, usually like a not very nice way and like rereading how I was telling myself the story and the time, now that leads me to like that kind of thing. Like, oh, okay. Well my new story is like, no, I didn't used to be like XYZ, negative thought. There are too many to pick from right now, you know, it was actually this. So, Christina, what would you add? Dr. Rose: I was thinking of the danger of the single story, you know, this sense of that. And, and I'm, again, this world that we were raised in believes that even like we only have one narrative going on in ourselves, you know… Anna: Multiplicity who? We are one, never changing person. Dr. Lemus: Right, monolithic. Dr. Rose: And one of the exercises that we often do is, we, week six or something in our, you know, eight week course, we'll take a look at something we wrote in week one or two. And we'll look at it from a perspective of, like, a loving adult, which we are, you know [laughs] you know, coming to that, coming back to a piece of writing from a place of grace, I love that love. And as, and, and as if we were, you know, the, the parent of the person who wrote that or the caretaker or the abuela or the elder, you know, but from a place of the love that we give to other people, you know, the love we give to those that we take care of. And so I think that's a, so that … exercise is such a shift in perspective for me too, you know, because yes, when I do go through my journals, I don't do it annually. I do do it like, probably every seven years or so. And it is a big deal and I do cry and it is, you know, it is, and it's beautiful. And it's also like heartbreaking. I'm like mija, like what the heck were you giving your energy to that person? Like, like no more, you know, it's, it's a big lesson, you know, for me. And um, and I do try to make it a ceremony too, you know, because I need, in order to come from a place of love, often I need my guides, I need my ancestors. I need the spirit world to be like around me, those who love me, you know? So that's what I would add. Anna: Before we wrapped, I was going to ask if someone was listening and just was like raring to go start scribbling where they would start. But I, I love both of the things that you just outlined, whether it's expanding on something with curiosity or writing to, to your younger self, your inner child. Those both sound like great places, so unless you have something else that you would suggest to our listeners for like one last writing prompt, Dr. Lemus: One last one last writing prompts is to like, do an outline of a children's, like a children's book where you're the main character, right? Like, and what would her superpowers be or their superpowers be and what would their environment be like? And yeah. Anna: Ahhhh! That is, is so good. I, I wanna go do that like right now, but this has been such an amazing conversation. I wish it could go on for like two more hours. So thank you for, for joining me today and talking about some of my favorite things and sharing some of your beautiful insights that I wanted to go write about now. So. Dr. Lemus: Thank you. Thank you for having, for having us. Anna: There's a reason I think of my later-in-life diagnosis when I think of the importance of rewriting my story or how I tell my story. It's that, like, our understanding of ourselves is always changing. Or like Dr. Rose said, we don't only have one story. We're made up of stories, past and present, and rewriting isn't about like denying the truth of our experiences at the time or correcting ourselves in retrospect—it's about releasing the false narratives that we're still holding onto as true, you know, so we can make room for the stories we want to tell. And… I mean, I don't know about you, but I think the next story I want to try telling is that children's book Dr. Lemus was talking about. So…who else is in? THEME MUSIC CREDITS Thanks for listening to Mood Ring, a production of APM Studios and Pizza Shark. We're a new show, so it really helps if you rate, review and share this episode with your friends.       You can even tag me if you're really into it — I'm @AnnaBroges on Twitter – that's Anna B-R-O-G-E-S … because Anna Borges was taken. We want to hear from you. You can get in touch at Moodringshow DOT ORG and click “Contact Us.” Or follow Mood Ring Show on Twitter and Instagram. You can also call and leave us a message at 833-666-3746.   Mood Ring was developed by Kristina Lopez. Our executive producers are Maria Murriel, Isis Madrid and Beth Pearlman. Our story editor is Erika Janik. Mijoe Sahiouni is our digital producer. This episode was produced by Jordan Kauwling. And as you know, I'm Anna Borges and I write, host and produce this show too.   APM Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. And finally, our music is by Mat Rotenberg.   Thanks again for listening, and I hope to see you next episode!   MUSIC FADE OUT

Host Anna Borges (The More Or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care) chats with Southern Solidarity co-founder Jasmine Araujo about mutual aid, creating community, and leaning on others during difficult times. Plus, Anna has a conversation with Mood Ring producer Jordan Kauwling about what a recent experience with expanding her community means to her. Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna @annabroges To support Southern Solidarity and learn how you can get involved visit southernsolidarity.org.  Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark!

Anna Borges interviews notOK app creator Hannah Lucas about how to get help during intense mental health moments. The conversation covers how the app works, how communication can deepen trust, and how it can be challenging to voice our needs. Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark. Full Transcript   Anna Borges: There's a word people associate with me a lot: vulnerable. Like, my work is vulnerable and thank you for being so vulnerable. And honestly? It couldn't be further from the truth. I SUCK at being vulnerable.   If that's surprising to hear, it's not just you. I didn't know that about myself for a really long time. My therapist was kind of the first one to float the idea and I didn't really buy it.   She kept at it, though. She was not gonna take no for an answer. At some point in our work together, she looked at me and said, “You talk openly about vulnerable things, but is that the same as actually being vulnerable?”   THEME MUSIC   My therapist wasn't impressed by my ability to write an essay about wanting to die or to tweet my way through a depressive episode. She wanted to know: Did I ever reach out to a friend when I was feeling suicidal, or did I only tell them about it when I got through the worst of it alone? Did I cry in front of other people? Like really cry? Did I let people sit with me when I was too depressed to talk, just because I needed company? Did I ask for help?   That's the kind of vulnerability I struggle with—because honestly? Vulnerability, in my opinion, is exposing whatever is toughest to expose. And that's what's tough for me. And whether or not you struggle with it too, or another kind of vulnerability, I figured we could all use a little guidance around how to actually ask for support when we need it.   Hey I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings, even when those feelings are big and scary and you really want someone there with you.   Every episode, we'll explore one new way to cope — with our feelings, with our baggage, with our brains, or with the world around us.   Reaching out to a loved one when you need support is the type of advice you hear everywhere. We know that's what we're supposed to do, but a lot of us just can't get ourselves to do it, or don't know how. Sometimes, instead of psyching yourself up to send the text or figuring out what to say in the first place, it can just feel easier to weather the storm by yourself.   So that's why I wanted to talk to today's guest.   Hannah Lucas is the co-creator of the notOK app. She worked with her brother Charlie to make it easier for people to reach out to loved ones when they're, well, “not okay”. And we'll get more into how the app works in our conversation, but for now I'll say: It's exactly the kind of thing that I need and what today's episode is all about: Finding ways to ask for help without actually having to ask for help.   Anna: Hey Hannah, I'm so excited to chat.   Hannah: Hey!   Anna: So you created an app with your brother, so for our listeners who haven't heard of it or aren't familiar, can you just give us a little bit of history there and tell us about how it works?   Hannah: So the notOK app is essentially a digital panic button. That when pressed it alerts the user's up to five preselected trusted contacts that the user is not okay and needs help, along with the user's GPS location, just in case the trusted contacts need to physically go get them.   Anna: Absolutely, and what inspired you to create it?   Hannah: I came up for the idea for the app when I was a freshman in high school, I had just been diagnosed with a chronic illness called POTS. It stands for postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome. And because of this, I was passing out all the time. I was being bullied, harassed, the whole nine. And it just made me spiral really deeply into depression and anxiety. Until one night I just, I couldn't handle the pressure anymore and I had a suicide attempt, but luckily my mom saved my life that night and I'm forever grateful for that. And that's when I knew, I desperately needed a tool to take my independence back from my chronic illness and my mental illness.   Anna: Thank you for sharing that, first of all. And I'm, I'm so glad as someone who deals with suicidal ideation and self-harm a lots always- nice isn't the word to hear, like to connect with other people who, who can relate. Like it's not nice because I hate that we can relate–   Hannah: It's comforting.   Anna: But it's comforting. Exactly, exactly. So if someone wanted to use the notOK app, when kind of do they use it, what kind of moments is it for?   Hannah: The notOK app is a crisis tool as well as pre-crisis, my therapist and I, we like to put it this way. I rate my stress and anxiety on a scale from one to 10, one being the lowest, 10 being I need emergency services right now. So when I feel myself building up about a four or five and I just feel it rising higher and higher, I normally press the button. So it doesn't always have to get to a crisis point. But of course crises do happen, every once in a while. So the notOK app is here for that. It's here for those tough moments where you don't know the words to say, but you need help.   Anna: So I loved what you said about how it can be really, really hard to find the literal words. Why, why, it's a big question, but like why, why is it so hard?! Like, like you, you, as you say, like, we are kind of in this … cultural moment where there is, I think a little bit more mental health literacy going around. Like we have a little bit more vocabulary, like not quite everything, but at least on social media, like but in the moment, in the moment, why is it so hard to reach out and to say, Hey, I'm not okay.   Hannah: Let's face it, mental illness lies. It tells you that you're not worthy. It tells you that nobody around you cares, that you don't have people around you. So mental illness really just shuts you up and it is so difficult to break that, that silence. So I just wanted to make it as easy as possible, because sometimes it's just like, I'm sitting here and like, I'm so overwhelmed and I'm so stressed out and I'm like, I need help, but I don't know how to ask for it. You know, I don't wanna be a burden.   Anna: I'm so glad you said that because one of my, perhaps more embarrassing personal questions, is if you have any tips or guidance or solidarity for people who are nervous about asking people to be their trusted contact in the first place, you know. I feel like my, my brain goes, no, you're a burden, you don't wanna like ask them to be your go-to person. That's too much. Like how do I shut that up?   Hannah: So whenever I add someone new as a trusted contact and I feel just, I just feel so anxious and I feel so nervous about it. I'm like, what if they say no, this is a big responsibility. I don't wanna be a burden. But then I honestly think to myself, what would happen, like if I just wasn't in that person's life anymore? And I know that's a bad way to think about it, but it's like thinking logically about it. There would be a hole in their life, you know. Like all of my relationships, I try to keep it 50/50. So, you know, just for healthy boundaries and everything. But it's like, they would miss me, you know, like they're choosing to be in my life, they're choosing to be my friend. They're choosing to be my support. So of course, you know, they would be okay with being a trusted contact, you know, they're already putting themselves in that position for me.   Anna: Absolutely. And have you found that asking them or hitting the button and reaching out to them has brought you closer with any of your trusted contacts?   Hannah: Oh, definitely. I have to say my favorite feature of this app is when you go and initially add a trusted contact, the trusted contact actually gets a text message that says, “Hey, so and so added you as a trusted contact for the notOK app.” And it gives them resources, and it tells them what a trusted contact is, and it tells them the responsibility and how to help the user. Which really is incredible on so many levels [Anna: yeah!] because a lot of people don't even know that their friends are struggling. And this opens up the conversation to say, “Hey, how can I be here for you?” You know, “how can we be there for each other? What's going on? You know, you don't always have to be perfect. It's okay. You know, your flaws are what make you beautiful.”   Anna: Yeah, oh, I love that it opens up a conversation because I, I wanted to ask, like, do you have any tips around how you might approach that conversation?   Hannah: Be vulnerable. It's the most difficult thing to do. But it's the most rewarding thing you can ever do in your life is just being vulnerable with the people who care about you. I'm not saying spill all of your secrets! [laughs] But it is okay to show them a softer side of you, you know? I don't wanna use the word damage, but … a side of you that isn't so perfect, you know, give them that chance to love those flaws of yours, you know.   After the break, we'll talk more with Hannah about coping with her peers and keeping it real.   THEME MUSIC FADE OUT   MIDROLL   THEME MUSIC FADE IN   Hey, welcome back. I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring. We're talking to Hannah Lucas about the app she helped create which is sort of a digital panic button and that helps you reach out to trusted friends and loved ones when you need support.   Anna: So you're, you're gen Z. Like, so just, I was just talking to my producer, Georgie, about how, you know, when I was growing up on the internet, like the life that I was putting out there, you know, like on Instagram or on Twitter was definitely like a better view of my life, but I never felt the pressure for like perfection.   Hannah: Yeah, exactly. But it's like, I was striving so hard for, for perfection. And it's like, all you see on social media is those perfect moments. You know, you don't see those flaws. You don't see them being who they are. You see these little bits and snippets of their life. And it's like, my life isn't as exciting. You know, I'm not as pretty, I'm not as skinny, you know, I'm not as fit, you know? It's just all those, it was a lot, it was a lot.   Anna: I wanna stick on like vulnerability for a second because I, I really love that. I'm curious how you're seeing in your social spaces on social media or IRL, this move toward more vulnerability. Are you seeing it in your circles or is it something that you've really introduced to them?   Hannah: You know, that's an interesting question. I think it's a little bit of both. My view on technology and social media it's changed drastically, but now I view it as more of a black mirror. You can find anything and everything on the internet, but it's a reflection of what you wanna see. Like, are you making the choice to follow these people who positively impact you, or are you following all the gossips and the drama and things that are just going to feed you negative energy, 24/7, you know? And with my friend group … I'd say that it was kind of difficult for my friends to be real. Like, I don't even wanna say vulnerable, but, just be real with everyone and even themselves with what's going on. But, it started with a conversation. We all had to have like a little group talk, on how we can do better and be better people and really grow. And it, at the end of the day, we all had to make a choice, you know, are we going to choose to be a little bit more vulnerable? Or are we gonna strive for the impossible perfection?   Anna: But I would love to ask about, kind of what comes after asking for help, because for me, one of, one of the things that's hard about asking for support or even getting asked for help is like, how you do that? You know, like, like literally, and I know it's different situation to situation, but do you have any tips for giving your loved ones guidance on the best way to support you in these moments of need?   Hannah: Everybody's different. But I will say have that honest trust, that honest conversation with your trusted contacts, when you first add them as a trusted contact. Work with them to figure out and create a safety plan for what to do when you're in these situations. Figure out coping mechanisms to bring you down … you know, when you've, when you feel the pressure rising.   Anna: I am curious if like, do you have, what are some of your hopes for the future of this kind of support and communication and being able to talk about mental health?   Hannah: Honestly my dream is that this app helps people realize that mental health and mental illness isn't that big of a deal. And what I mean by that is just treating it immediately when you see the signs, you know, you don't have to deal with the stigma. Just go get help, cause that's the most important thing.   Anna: Absolutely. And I'm so glad that that is changing.   Hannah: Yeah, it's about time. [Laughs]   Anna: Well, Hannah, thank you so much for chatting with me today. It's been, it's been a blast.   Hannah: Thank you so much for having me.   CHIMING MUSIC   Anna Borges: There may never be a quick and easy way to make the terrifying ordeal of letting other people in less terrifying, but Hannah did find a way to help skip some of the most intimidating steps.   I'll be honest. I'm still in the early stages of even considering using something like the notOK app. But I'm taking baby steps to ask for help in my way.   For example, I went through a period pretty recently where I was not okay. And when I was in it, I withdrew from my friends like usual. But this time, when I rejoined the land of the living and told a friend about what happened, I also decided to try saying something like: “Hey. I don't ask for help when I need it because it's hard, but it's something I'm working on so if you notice me isolating, I would really appreciate you reaching out.”   For now, that's my version of the notOK app—asking my friends to help me out so I don't have to ask for it. Baby steps. And maybe there are baby steps that would work for you, too. Maybe you have a codeword that you text when you're not okay. but it's hard to say you're not okay.   At the end of the day, it's really about finding ways to make the hard parts—whatever the hard parts are for you—a little easier.   And hey if you have any other small exercises in vulnerability to share, I could use all of the baby steps I could get.   CREDITS   Thanks for listening to Mood Ring, a production of APM Studios and Pizza Shark. We're a new show, so it really helps if you rate, review and share this episode with your friends.           You can even tag me if you're really into it — I'm @AnnaBroges on Twitter – that's Anna B-R-O-G-E-S … because Anna Borges was taken. We want to hear from you. You can get in touch at Moodringshow DOT ORG and click “Contact Us.” Or follow Mood Ring Show on Twitter and Instagram. You can also call and leave us a message at 833-666-3746.   Mood Ring was developed by Kristina Lopez. Our executive producers are Maria Murriel, Isis Madrid and Beth Pearlman. Our story editor is Erika Janik. Mijoe Sahiouni is our digital producer. This episode was produced by Georgina Hahn. And as you know, I'm Anna Borges and I write, host and produce this show too.   APM Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. And finally, our music is by Mat Rotenberg.   Thanks again for listening and I hope to see you next episode!   MUSIC FADE OUT

 Host Anna Borges interviews guest Zachary Zane about platonic intimacy. Follow Mood Ring @moodringshow Follow Anna ​​@annabroges Mood Ring is a production of American Public Media and Pizza Shark. Full Transcript   Anna Borges: The first time I realized I was touch starved during the pandemic is when the world started opening up and one of the first things I did was go and get a wax for the first time. And as my wax tech was like painfully ripping the hair off my body, I thought, "Huh, it's so nice to be touched by another human again."   It's not that I didn't realize that I was lonely or could really stand to have been fucked or cuddled — I live alone and I'm single, so during the height of pandemic lockdown, I was … very, very isolated. But it wasn't until I felt this visceral rush of relief when I typically felt excruciating pain that I realized, Oh, I needed this.   Like, actually needed it. Because when I say I was touch starved, I'm not being cute or  dramatic. Tough starvation is a real thing. It's also known as skin hunger or touch deprivation, but whatever you call it, we know that going for too long without human touch has real psychological effects. Starting with when we bond with our caregivers through touch when we're infants, we're wired to need touch, for our development and for our mental health.   So what do we do when we're not getting any?       Hey, I'm Anna Borges and this is Mood Ring, a practical guide to feelings, even when you're feeling so untouched like a 2007 pop song.   Every episode, we'll explore one new way to cope—with our feelings, with our baggage, with our brains, or with the world around us.   Anna Borges: Today we're talking about cuddling with your friends, which might seem like kind of a leap from a bikini wax. But that's because I didn't know until the last minute that I wanted this episode to be about cuddling your friends. Before that, I knew I wanted to do something on touch starvation, and, you know, ways to scratch that itch. We thought of massages, or loving self-touch and yep, getting waxed, but, you know, none of them really felt right. Because sure, all of that involves getting touched, but none of it is intimacy. And I was missing intimacy as much as I was missing the touch itself.   And then I had this exchange on Twitter.   SOUND OF KEYBOARD TYPING   I was doing what I do—AKA tweeting about whatever thought comes into my head and conveniently forgetting that my family and coworkers follow me—and I was basically like, “Hey, show of hands, who else hasn't had real physical intimacy since the Before Times?"   And lots of people chimed in and long story short, the tweet led to some talk about why platonic intimacy isn't more of a thing. Like, why is so much non-sexual touch still reserved mostly for sexual and romantic partners?   And one of the people who chimed in is actually one of today's guests.   I slid into his DMs like, “Hey, want to platonically cuddle?” and by that I mean, “Do you want to come on my podcast?” And thankfully, he said yes.   Zachary Zane is a writer who mostly focuses on sex and bisexuality in his work. He's behind the erotic nonficiton zine Boyslut and is a columnist for Men's Health. And most importantly, he's someone who, quite frankly, seemed to have a lot of platonic intimacy in his life. So, I wanted us to learn from him together.   Anna Borges: Oh, I'm so excited to chat today! Were you luckier than I was during the pandemic and, like, got plenty of touch? What, what was it like for you?   Zach Zane: Um, I- initially, no, I did not get any touch whatsoever and that was not fun as I, as you can imagine. And then I actually, one of the few people that managed to find love during the pandemic, which I know is probably problematic to say. But uh-   Anna Borges: I hate you. I'm so jealous.   Zach Zane: And, and then, so we kind of cuddled up together. So I had a primary partner who I was able to see and cuddle with, towards the kind of end of it. Cause there was that lull kind of the middle, during the summer where I was like, okay, I feel safe meeting people, and that's when I met them. And then we kind of went back into lockdown and then we were with each other. So I was very lucky.   Anna Borges: Ugh. Oh, and for our listeners who aren't familiar with, like ethical non-monogamy and polyamory, can you just give like a quick one liner on like what you mean when you say primary partner?   Zach Zane: Sure. So primary partner for me, I … it, it just like, I actually practice, like, non-hierarchical poly, but so maybe saying primary is not the correct term. So essentially when you have multiple partners, this is kind of like, for me in the sense was kind of the, the main one that I was kind of hanging out with, the main one who I'm in love with, the one who I call my boyfriend. And then I kind of have more casual partners, which are almost like, honestly, friends with benefits. Although poly people just kind of love putting terms to absolutely everything, unnecessarily. But, so this was more the person who I'd spend my time with more consistently.   Anna Borges: Got it. Got it. And I love, I love that you say friends with benefits because immediately my brain goes, okay, well, this episode is about cuddling your friends. First, I would love to just hear about your experience with platonic intimacy and how, and what that means for you and what it looks like in your life.   Zach Zane: I think I'm very … lucky that I've been able to have it, but I'm able to have it because I am queer. And I recognize that, where cuddling with another man platonically, I feel like it's much more accepted in the gay community, in the queer community, than if I was completely straight. And then I think it would just be more challenging if, you know, if you're straight, you have to be really comfortable with your masculinity to be able to platonically cuddle another straight friend.   Anna Borges: Hmm, absolutely. What kind of experiences have you had in this area?   Zach Zane: Yeah. And I really think in that regard, it's more like relationship anarchy. Again, there are a million terms and I know it's annoying, but kind of relationship anarchy, one of the  key … parts of that is the idea that you don't prioritize kind of romantic relationships over your friendships and your friendships can be equally as important and equally as fulfilling, even though you're not sexual, even if you're not in, in a romantic relationship. And I kinda love that about relationship anarchy.   Anna Borges: But I'm curious how you, if you ever had the expectation that touch and physical intimacy was only for romantic partners and if you had to release the expectation of that and accept that it could be with platonic relationships, or if it's always been that way for you?   Zach Zane: No, I think I definitely had this idea that … you know, touch, whether it's cuddling, or touch that extends beyond sex, was definitely still for romantic relationships or sexual relationships. I think the only exception is when you were, like, sad or crying. Is, if I'm looking back on it, it's when you're crying. That was the only time it was kind of more acceptable to have these elements of platonic touch as a means of comfort. Like why do I have to reach a point of such despair in order to, for it to be socially acceptable for me to have platonic touch. But I really think, the thing that changed was, again, I- was being queer, and just, I was part of this community where people were platonic touching. Being like, Hey, let's cuddle, let's get in a bed or just holding each other or in a way that was just the norm … or definitely more of the norm in a way that wasn't weird or necessarily sexual.   Anna Borges: Absolutely. So it does sound like you have, like, no lack of channels for platonic intimacy.   Zach Zane: No I 100% agree, but I also wanna be like, I'm in the minority and I'm very lucky to have this, and I'm lucky to have my friends and my community and my partners. And again, it's all part of the queer and poly world, and that's why I've been able to get this.   After a break, we'll get some advice for listeners who might be ready to snuggle up with their friends but don't know how to ask, so stay tuned.   MIDROLL   Hey, welcome back to Mood Ring, I'm Anna Borges. Let's get back to my conversation with sex writer and activist Zachary Zane about cuddling our friends.   Anna Borges: So, I'm curious if you would have any advice for listeners who aren't in these communities, but who might wanna take some of this wisdom to apply to their friendship. And they're like, I really want platonic intimacy, but as you called out, unless you're in a space where that's normalized and acceptable, it could be really awkward.   Zach Zane: I'm, I'm always just a fan of asking for what you want and then being, the key about asking for what you want being okay with rejection and not being weird. That's the key to asking for what you want, is being super okay with rejection, not making it weird when they get awkward or uncomfortable. Cause they've never been asked that question before. And they might just say no, because like they're like, no, no. And then they might come back being like, actually that sounds really nice. So just, the key is in how you take their rejection or they might be like, Hey! Actually, yeah, I'm really touched starved, too. And especially now, I think because of the pandemic, it actually creates more of an entry point than potentially what you've had before, because you're like, I had no touch for two years completely and I'm starved for it. Makes it an easier entry point, I think.   Anna Borges: Yeah. And, and that's on, even on the physical side, and on the emotional side, it does involve being vulnerable and admitting like, Hey, I'm seeking something because I lack it. And I'm lonely. Or I, you know, I wonder if, because this is so normalized in your circles, if you still deal with that or if you ever did, or if it's something that's come with practice.   Zach Zane: I, I mean, I think it's scary. I think anytime being vulnerable or intimate or expressing, Hey, I, I miss being touched like, it is a challenging thing for a lot of people to admit. I mean, hopefully you're doing this with friends who you trust, who you feel. That's the point of friendship to be, you're allowed to be vulnerable. You're allowed to be intimate. You're allowed to share your darkest desires. They're here to support you. They're here to help you. So kind of let them do that. And I think it's one of those things that's actually, so everyone wins from this.   Anna Borges: Absolutely. Oh! So before we wrap, because we've had such an emphasis on like the importance of communication and I'm loving all the takeaways, I was wondering if we could walk through, which we've touched on a little bit so far, but a script for listeners to take away, like, hey, they want to make an ask for the first time of one of their friends. What exactly might they say?   Zach Zane: I think it's better to air on the side of being more blunt and direct. And I think, being blunt and direct is almost a learning curve, and then receiving someone being blunt and direct is a learning curve, but it gets easier. When you just kind of express what it is that you want very clearly where there's no ambiguity, and that way they know what they're getting into, they are fully consenting with the knowledge of everything that you've told them and what this is gonna be. So I understand that this sounds on the side of maybe blunter than you would like, and you can always soften it yourself. But I think something along the lines of like, Hey, I have a question for you. I've just been really starved for touch right now, and really all of COVID. And so I was wondering if you'd be open to cuddling a bit. I just miss being held and holding people. And I really trust you, and would love to do this with you. And then if you want, you can literally throw out at the end, I promise no funny business.   Anna Borges: [laughs] The little kicker. Oh, I love that. That doesn't feel too blunt. That feels very vulnerable, compassionate and also complimentary. Complimentary? Complimentary.   Zach Zane: Yeah, no, I think it's that. I think you're, you're expressing your vulnerability and, and desire for intimacy in a way that … again, 99% of us crave the same thing. So this is a universal desire. If you wanted something completely out there, okay, then it's a different conversation. But I think if anyone, you know, they can easily empathize, sympathize or odds are, are craving the same thing. So you're not alone in your desires.   Anna Borges: Absolutely, ugh. And that, I think, is a beautiful note to end on. So thank you so much for this lovely conversation.   Zach Zane: Awesome, thank you so much.   Anna Borges: And where can people find you if they wanna see more of your work?   Zach Zane: So, my website's always greatzacharyzane.com. Or Twitter and Instagram, both as zacharyzane_. So z-a-c-h-a-r-y-z-a-n-e underscore. Just know that I am extremely shadow banned on Instagram, so you have to type in my whole name and handle to be able to find me. But that is because I post hot and sexy photos along with hot and sexy content. So, so, hopefully you guys will enjoy it.   Anna Borges: See, it'll be worth the effort spelling the whole thing out.   Zach Zane: Exaaaaactly. Exactly.   So how many of you listened to Zachary's script and can't imagine being that vulnerable and straightforward? Because I feel you.   But the thing is, Zachary was so right when he said that this need for intimacy is universal, especially right now when so many of us are more disconnected than we've ever been. It might feel exposing to put yourself out there like that, but hey, when I think about getting that message from the other side of things? That kind of request is one I would be so thrilled to receive.   So maybe we can all be a little braver about initiating the intimacy we want to see in the world? Because hey, someone has to be the first one to ask.   CREDITS   Thanks for listening to Mood Ring, a production of APM Studios and Pizza Shark. We're a new show, so it really helps if you rate, review and share this episode with your friends.   You can even tag me if you're really into it. I'm @AnnaBroges on Twitter — that's Anna B-R-O-G-E-S, because Anna Borges was taken. We wanna hear from you! You can get in touch at Moodringshow DOT ORG and click contact us, or you can follow MoodRingShow on Twitter and Instagram. You can also call and leave a message at 833-666-3746.   Mood Ring was developed by Kristina Lopez. Our executive producers are Maria Murriel, Isis Madrid and Beth Pearlman. Our story editor is Erika Janik. Mijoe Sahiouni is our digital producer. This episode was produced by Georgina Hahn. And as you know, I'm Anna Borges and I write, host and produce this show, too. APM Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. And finally, our music is by Mat Rotenberg.   Thanks again for listening, and I hope to see you next episode!

Anna and the Mood Ring team are all still reeling from the horrific shootings over the past two weeks, and if you've been following along with us so far, you know that we believe strongly in not forcing the show to go on, and giving ourselves space to be human and feel our emotions in experiencing things as they are happening to us, rather than numbing out attempt to pretend like everything is normal. So, in lieu of our Mood Ring episode this week, we wanted to share a conversation from yesterday, May 25, about coping with prolonged grief as terrible things just continue to happen, produced by our friends over at Minnesota Public Radio and host Angela Davis.  We thought some of you might find it useful right now with everything going on. We'll be back with a regular episode of Mood Ring next week and we really hope that you are able to take care of yourself in the meantime. In the light of the recent tragic mass shootings, Minnesota Public Radio News host Angela Davis talks with listeners and with two therapists about the waves of loss many people experienced over the past two years, they discuss how people can cope with prolonged grief and trauma. Her guests are:  Bravada Garrett-Akinsanya is a psychologist who specializes in African-American mental health. She is the president and founder of Brakins Consulting & Psychological Services and the executive director of African American Child Wellness Institute, Inc. in Plymouth. Fiyyaz Karim is a lecturer in the University of Minnesota's masters programs for integrated behavioral health and addictions counseling. He has worked in the areas of grief and loss associated with unemployment, relationship break ups, chronic illness, addictions and, most recently, the pandemic.

It's time for a much needed temperature check. Join us this episode as we discuss gaslighting men, billionaire pu$$y, and mental health. Grab your cups! XOXO Petty Party Get Interactive with Us! Youtube: Petty Party Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pettypartypod Twitter: https://twitter.com/pettypartypod Email: Petty Party12814@gmail.com Follow US Crystal: @champagnecrys Jori: @jorialiah Michelle: @chellysays Nikki: @stanleyoglevee Paulette: @amakalette

First: Russia is restrategizing in Ukraine ahead of an important deadline. We'll take a look at how the war is changing.  Next: We've also got the other big headlines from the week: from Netflix execs are freaking out right now, to the latest union efforts at Apple. Plus: why millions of student loan borrowers are about to get some relief.  Next up: If traveling has been a nightmare for you, you're not alone. Are cancellations, delays, and lost bags the new normal? We'll ask a travel expert how to avoid the mile cry club.  ICYMI: All eyes are on France as they pick a new president. And spoiler: both candidates are controversial. We'll break down why this election has everyone saying ooh la la…in 60 seconds.  Then: While some people use Earth Day as an excuse to post their vacation pics on IG, we're asking someone who lives a climate-conscious lifestyle 24/7 for her tips. PS: if you want more tips, read her climate diary here. Finally: Has your phone been blowing up…but not in a good way? Americans are getting spam texts at record high rates. We'll break down how to clean up your messages.  On this episode, you'll hear from:  Shelby Magid, associate director, the Atlantic Council's Eurasia Center Matthew Howe, Senior Manager of Travel Intelligence, Morning Consult Alicia, Rachel, Madison, Skimm HQ'rs  Lucia Priselac, Director, The Uproot Project Want more Skimm?  Sign up for our free daily newsletter Email us your questions about what's going on in the news right now  Subscribe and leave us a review wherever you get your podcasts Skimm'd by Alex Carr, Will Livingston, and Blake Lew-Merwin. Additional help from Sagine Corrielus. Engineered by Andrew Callaway and Elie McAfee-Hahn. TheSkimm's head of audio is Graelyn Brashear.

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Brady Report - Thursday March 31, 2022