Podcast appearances and mentions of david arrell

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Best podcasts about david arrell

Latest podcast episodes about david arrell

Pregnancy & Birth Made Easy
David Arrell's Blueprint for First-Time Dads: Embrace the Journey of Fatherhood

Pregnancy & Birth Made Easy

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 17, 2024 45:17


David Arrell, founder of Welcome to Fatherhood, discusses how dads can actively engage in the pregnancy process by viewing it as their own journey. Dads are encouraged to participate through birth classes, doula support, and conversations with their partners emphasizing emotional growth, communication, and leadership in fatherhood.Where to find David:WebsiteInstagramPodcastLinks Mentioned:My Essential Birth CourseMy Essential Birth Postpartum CourseMy Essential Birth Instagram3 Free Exercises Dad TipsGET IN TOUCH!

Birth Story Podcast
198 How Dad's Can Help You and Be The Best Father and Partner / Dad coaching/ Welcome to Fatherhood with David Arrell (New 2024)

Birth Story Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2024 45:31


Did you listen to the previous episode 197? Start there. I interviewed David Arrell, the author of Welcome to Fatherhood, in 2021. This is a part 2 follow up in 2024 to that initial discussion.  This episode is about hoow men can achive their highlest level of healthy mascunlinity and embrace fatherhood and partnership successfully.  Please share this episode with a father or soon to be father you know.  You can connect with David at www.welcometofatherhood.com and use code BIRTHSTORY for a special discount when you check out. XOXO- Heidi  Looking for a doula in Charlotte, NC? Find my team and me at www.BirthStoryBoutique.com To enroll in Birth Story Academy, head over to www.BirthStory.com and use code BIRTHSTORYFRIEND for $20 OFF for being a podcast listener.   

Birth Story Podcast
197 Welcome to Fatherhood with David Arrell (Replay 2021)

Birth Story Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2024 82:17


David Arrell, the author of Welcome to Fatherhood, chats with Heidi about this powerful book to help male partners with new fatherhood transitions.  Please share this episode with a father or soon to be father in your life. XOXO Heidi  PS. David mentions his favorite baby products in this episode which is include the Babytone Sensor and the Frida nose sucker. 

ps fatherhood david arrell
Wellness Force Radio
Victoria Rose | Luminous Birth: Conscious Birthing for Generational Healing + How To Liberate Your Lineage

Wellness Force Radio

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 9, 2024 93:56


Wellness + Wisdom | Episode 654 How can conscious birthing heal your lineage? Victoria Rose, Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology Educator, joins Josh Trent on the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast, episode 654, to share how birth can be a healing journey for both the parents and the child, why parenthood is a divine path, how birth can have the same healing powers as Ayahuasca, and why becoming a parent changes you. "Birth provides maximum opportunity to terminate any and all of the trauma that you've been through in this lifetime and all lifetimes. It's birth that can dissolve that." - Victoria Rose Transform Into Birth Transform Your Birth Experience Into a Lifetime of Health, Success, Joy, and Happiness. This course is designed to equip you with the knowledge, skills, and support for a blissful and pain-free birth journey. You know the importance of preparing for birth, yet navigating through an ocean of information can feel so overwhelming. Imagine if you could shed all the stress, and do what you long to do most: Deeply connect with your baby and fully embrace the beauty, magic, and sensuality of pregnancy. This series encompasses all that's needed to manifest the best possible birth outcomes. Book Your Free Call with Victoria + Get 10% off of Transform Into Birth with code WELLNESSANDWISDOM

Informed Pregnancy Podcast
Ep. 412 A Birth Story with Joanna Bavero

Informed Pregnancy Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2024 56:52


Artist, mother of two, and past guest Joanna Bavero returns to the podcast to talk about her second pregnancy and birth experience. Connect with the guest online: @joannabaverofineart, @thejoannapiccoli, and joannabavero.com Father's Day is this month! Know a new or expectant dad who needs some helpful parenting prep (like guidance through pregnancy, labor, or birth)? David Arrell's Welcome to Fatherhood online program is available to stream now exclusively on Informed Pregnancy Plus! Want more pregnancy + parenting? Informed Pregnancy Plus is a new streaming platform by pregnancy focused chiropractor Dr. Elliot Berlin. Dedicated to pregnancy, parenting, and everything in between, IP+ offers everything from prenatal workouts and yoga flows to original series and iconic birth films like The Business of Being Born. (Pssst, subscriptions are a great gift for parents-to-be!) Start your FREE TRIAL of Informed Pregnancy+ and get access to all our curated pregnancy and parenting content: https://www.informedpregnancy.tv/  Keep up with Dr. Berlin and the Informed Pregnancy Project online! www.informedpregnancy.com www.instagram.com/doctorberlin/ www.facebook.com/InformedPregnancy www.twitter.com/doctorberlin Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Informed Pregnancy Podcast
Ep. 411 Welcome to Fatherhood with David Arrell

Informed Pregnancy Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2024 34:37


Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

fatherhood david arrell
Baby Talk with Katie & David
Better Partners Make Better Parents - Season 3 Wrap Up

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2023 52:44


Katie & David wrap up Season 3 here by each sharing their Top 3 Tips for helping new parents better connect in the midst of new parenthood chaos. We both firmly believe that Better Partners Make Better Parents and really get into some (hopefully helpful!) specifics here in this episode. Katie unpacks: 1) Sharing the Care right from the start 2) Trying to be Curious vs assuming and arguing 3) Leaning into Joy - where can we find the "yes"? David walks through: 1) Building Bridges of connection through Shared Agreements 2) Embrace the Suck so you can Own the Outcome as a way to get unstuck and move from "victim" to "Leader" 3) There is no Bouncing Back, only Bouncing Forward Helpful links to some of David's previous Blogposts and Youtube Videos that further explore some of the ideas mentioned in this episode: Becoming a "Leader IN" your relationship - https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/the-leader-of-vs-a-leader-in Shared Agreements - https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/shared-agreements-amp-baby-basics Building Bridges - https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/build-those-bridges Bouncing Forward - https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/bouncing-forward New Dad Blues Busters Video - https://youtu.be/9oswUd2Z14A ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

Baby Talk with Katie & David
When Parenting Styles Differ

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 25, 2023 38:35


What happens when parenting approaches differ? How do our own unconscious patterns influence our ability to show up grounded and focused when things get tricky? How much variance in parenting styles is "normal," and how can those differences be navigated as a team? Listen in this week as we explore these questions and more. Topics covered include: How our own unconsciuous energy and issues often come up under the pressures of parenting How unhelpful patterns and processes can pull us, and/or our partners, away from our plans The power of self-compassion as an entry to better connecting Asking for a "re-do" when we don't show up as our best self in conflict Dad Tip #27 - Fathers Don't Mother Big Idea #10 - Be Attentive, Be Calm, Be Competent (in that order!) Shared agreements and bouncing forward ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Baby's Parental Preferences - The Good, the Bad, & the Ugly

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 14, 2023 37:57


This week we talk about Baby's parental preferences, why they are understandable and healthy, and share a few tips for helping better connect with your partner over this tricky topic. Items covered include: Familiarity and Safety needs drive Baby's behavior The Hierarchy of Attachment Balancing Baby's preferences and parental abilities Bostering your own abilities to share the load, and lots more Special tips for Dads struggling in this space And no, weaning is not the answer! Article Referenced: Hierarchy of Attachment- https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0163638312001117 ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Breastfeeding and Weaning Support

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 31, 2023 37:46


In honor of World Breastfeeding Week, Katie leads the way in our conversation about Breastfeeding and Weaning as a whole family commitment. How this commitment looks and what challenges are faced vary from the planning and beginning stages of Breastfeeding, to the ongoing efforts to sustain it, and to the inevitable concluding process of Weaning. All of these stages have emotional, relational, and practical components, so listen in this week as we discuss: Helpful tips for getting off to the best start to your Breastfeeding jounrey The importance of your Village for support and comfort Partner focused tips for connecting and supporting the journey every step of the way and so much more Reference links for this episode include: Katie's weekly support group: /www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting Previous Breastfeeding episode: https://www.babytalkpodcast.net/infant-feeding-pt-1-breastfeeding-basics/ Previous Partner focused perspective: https://www.babytalkpodcast.net/infant-feeding-pt-2-partners-pumping-and-planning-ahead/ ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Biological Differences between New Mothers and New Fathers

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2023 40:32


Join is this week as Katie & David explore and discuss some of the profound and powerful differences in the biology of new Mothers and Fathers. How do their respective brains change and adapt to parenthood in different ways? How does knowing about various neurotransmitter levels and activations help us see our partners in a more understanding and compassion light? How can we appreciate these differences as attributes rather than flaws? Topics covered include: How Mom Brains and Dad Brains are wired differently What this wiring looks like and how it shows up in attention and behavior What feedback loops are heightened, and how these circuits shape parenting Testosterone, Oxctocin, and other hormonal influences Specific tips for new Moms and Dads for better connecting to each other Bringing more space, grace, and understanding into how parenting styles differ Articles reference in this episode include: https://bloomlife.com/preg-u/dadbrain/ https://www.happiestbaby.com/blogs/parents/fatherhood-mens-bodies https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/15/parenting/baby/fatherhood-mens-bodies.html https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/neuroscience-of-fatherhood/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/thoughts-and-feelings/202304/being-more-involved-affects-new-fathers-biologically https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.745767/full ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting David hosts a monthly Dad Zone Thriving Zoom conversation to all new and expectant Dads everywhere. This monthly conversation has been going strong over at the Nest for the past year, and David is happy to open it up to all the Dads out there who are interested in sharing their challenges and successes in finding their way to the Dad Zone. Tune in the last Thursday of each month at 6pm PST/9pm EST and join the conversation! https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

Fourth Trimester Podcast: The first months and beyond | Parenting | Newborn Baby | Postpartum | Doula
Episode 85: Fatherhood And Healthy Masculinity With Welcome to Fatherhood Author David Arrell

Fourth Trimester Podcast: The first months and beyond | Parenting | Newborn Baby | Postpartum | Doula

Play Episode Listen Later May 13, 2023 23:51


Fatherhood and healthy masculinity is all about finding a balance between traditional and progressive dad stereotypes, building teamwork and communication with co-parents, and embodying positive values and aspirations as a dad. Join us with David Arrell, author of 'Welcome To Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood'. https://fourthtrimesterpodcast.com/

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Making the Invisible Work Visible

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2023 38:43


This week Katie & David tackle one of the touchiest topics out there in the new parenthood space, and one that is sure to resonate for those with children of any age - Invisible Work. What is this so-called "Invisible Work"? Why is it such a touchy topic? For Moms and Dads alike, what really "counts" here, and how can we help our partners understand and appreciate all that we do? And equally as important, what can we do to better understand and appreciate what they do that may be invisible to us? Areas covered include: How new parenthood brings on a lot of new "work," most of which needs to be done in the moment How that work can remain hard to quantify, but still add up to a lot How each partner has an unconscious list, or caretaker ticker, that they keep track of and manage Comparing lists to share the load Clarifying roles and responsibilities Turning unexpressed expectations into shared agreements Turning unexpressed hopes into concrete plans Letting go of perfection Communication, teamwork, collaboration, and so much more ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting David hosts a monthly Dad Zone Thriving Zoom conversation to all new and expectant Dads everywhere. This monthly conversation has been going strong over at the Nest for the past year, and David is happy to open it up to all the Dads out there who are interested in sharing their challenges and successes in finding their way to the Dad Zone. Tune in the last Thursday of each month at 6pm PST/9pm EST and join the conversation! https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/  

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Redefining Intimacy

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 3, 2023 53:14


What does intimcacy look like in early parenthood? And how can we redefine it together to help us connect with more care, compassion, and empathy and we try to bounce forward and strengthen our relationship? Intimacy issues are one of the most energized topics that come up in the new parent support groups that we both host, and here in this episode we share some of common barriers that new parents face as well as strategies and options for overcoming them. Bouncing forward into parenthood is the name of the game here, not trying to bounce back to your pre-baby relationship dynamcis. Topics covered here include: Physical & Emotional challenges common to new Moms and Dads Emotional challenges like loneliness, confusion, and  Self-honesty as a prerequisite for clear requests of your partner Us time vs Me time Resentment is a thief Sharing "brakes & accelerators" Love Language application "Stratitude of Gratitude" Space & Grace ... and so much more Reference links: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/new-baby-who-dis https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/blog/gratitude-the-6th-love-language https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes https://www.emilynagoski.com/come-as-you-are-worksheets ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting David hosts a monthly Dad Zone Thriving Zoom conversation to all new and expectant Dads everywhere. This monthly conversation has been going strong over at the Nest for the past year, and David is happy to open it up to all the Dads out there who are interested in sharing their challenges and successes in finding their way to the Dad Zone. Tune in the last Thursday of each month at 6pm PST/9pm EST and join the conversation! https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/  

Fourth Trimester Podcast: The first months and beyond | Parenting | Newborn Baby | Postpartum | Doula
Episode 84: New Father Support Group Fundamentals With David Arrell

Fourth Trimester Podcast: The first months and beyond | Parenting | Newborn Baby | Postpartum | Doula

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 29, 2023 27:29


We asked the fatherhood expert: What are the top three topics that come up during First Time Dad group sessions? David Arrell is the author of 'Welcome To Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood', he is a Dad Coach and a leader of new father support groups. David is our guest on the Fourth Trimester Podcast. On this episode he demystifies 'new father support groups' by sharing the top three topics that arise during his sessions.

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Season 3 Begins - Parenting & Partnership

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 26, 2023 26:54


Season 3 is finally here! Our theme is going to be Parenting & Partnership and here in the intro episode we talk about our plans for exploring the most common concerns and challenges that we each hear from from the new Moms and Dads in our support groups. We hope that these weekly discussions can help cultivate more awareness, empathy, and understanding for ourselves and our partners. We aren't here to take sides, but to build bridges and foster greater connection and collaboration in all of our efforts to be the best parent and partner possible. Topics we'll cover this season include: Redefining Intimacy in Early Parenthood Biology of Parenthood in Men and Women Fathers Don't Mother Making the Invisible Work Visible Understanding and Appreciating Partnership Managing Differences in Parenting Styles and Values Working With Baby's Preferences Breastfeeding as a Family Commitment And so much more! ***** Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting David hosts a monthly Dad Zone Thriving Zoom conversation to all new and expectant Dads everywhere. This monthly conversation has been going strong over at the Nest for the past year, and David is happy to open it up to all the Dads out there who are interested in sharing their challenges and successes in finding their way to the Dad Zone. Tune in the last Thursday of each month at 6pm PST/9pm EST and join the conversation! https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/

All About Pregnancy & Birth
[REBROADCAST] Coaching Dads Through the “WTF” Moments of Fatherhood with David Arrell

All About Pregnancy & Birth

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2023 54:08


This week's episode is a rebroadcast because my husband Falcon and I are taking a much needed trip togther with just the two of us. And in the spirit of he and I taking some time together, I chose an episode that you and your partner can listen to together! I interview David Arrell, author of Welcome to Fathrhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childirth, and Fatherhood. Grab your partner so you both can take a listen and soak up all the goodness in this episode. I know you are going to enjoy it and find it really helpful!   In this Episode, You'll Learn About: -How to be a supportive and attentive teammate through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum -Why it's important to look at parenthood as “teamwork,” as opposed to “women's work” -How to handle people who challenge a more progressive approach to fatherhood / being a stay at home dad -What inspired David to write his book -How to use code words to ask for or offer support during pregnancy -What kinds of obstacles are being created by covid -Why hiring a doula can be helpful for both partners during birth   -- Full website notes: drnicolerankins.com/episode101 Check out The Birth Preparation Course Register for the class How to Create a Birth Plan the Right Way

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Katie & David Better the Birth Space with exciting updates and offerings!

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 11, 2023 23:07


Katie and David wrap up Season 2 and share some exciting updates and offerings from both The Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood in their own efforts in Bettering the Birth Space. Katie now has a weekly FREE Embracing Pregnancy prenatal group offering over at the Nest that meets via Zoom every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific. This weekly pregnancy Q&A meetup is run by a rotating panel of prenatal practicioners and features frequent guests that come from a wide range of perinatal support services inlcuding ayurvedic nutritionists, midwives, and acupunturists. Come check it out to learn more about these various services in a warm, welcoming environment.  Katie also continues to offer her FREE weekly Embracing Parenthood Postpartum support meetup via Zoom every Thursday at 1pm PST. Katie runs these herself, so please drop on in to experience more of her wisdom, grace, and compassion in person. https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting David will soon be opening up his monthly Zoom Dad Zone Thriving conversation to all new and expectant Dads everywhere. This monthly conversation has been going strong over at the Nest for the past year, and David is happy to open it up to all the Dads out there who are interested in sharing their challenges and successes in finding their way to the Dad Zone. Tune in the last Thursday of each month at 6pm PST/9pm EST and join the conversation! https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Katie & David

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Getting better prepared for a Hospital Birth with the Hospital Doulas Lisa Collins & Marnie Lea

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 4, 2023 65:27


Since 98% of US births happen in the hospital then there needs to be a better way to get prepared for Hospital Birth and lower the rates of trauma and preventable interventions that many folks want to avoid. Tune in today to hear how Lisa & Marnie, The Hospital Doulas, have put together some programs focused on supporting this vast majority of parents to have amazing birth outcomes beyond the Hospital's minimal standards of "healthy Baby and Mama." In this episode we discuss: - You don't know what you don't know - and how to see past your blindspots - The BRAIN acronym and its usefulness in labor and delivery - Their unique approach to working together with your Hospital team - The importance of treating your birth team as individual people to help you get treated as an individual person - A positive birth experience is much more about empowered decision making than external events - "Routine Care" can be VERY different than "evidenced-based care" - The true role of us Dads in the delivery room ... and so much more. Helpful links: Main page: https://www.thehospitaldoulascircle.com Free PDF of 100 questions: https://www.thehospitaldoulascircle.com/opt-in Their Masterclass registration: https://www.thehospitaldoulascircle.com/kajabisalespagetemplate-201208-152631-1619377878-1 ***** To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: The Hospital Doulas

Baby Talk with Katie & David
(Part 2) Perinatal Mental Health & Postpartum Thriving with Jennifer Summerfeldt - Part 2 of 2

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2022 60:55


Today's Part 2 continues last week's Part 1 of our interview with Jennifer Summerfeldt - Perinatal Therapist and CEO of ASK Therapy, former doula and childbirth educator, and transformational coach. We pick right up from where we last off last week entering the 4th Trimester Postpartum space of home with your new baby. This 4th Trimester Postpartum timeframe is inherently disruptive, discombobulating, and disregulating, especially in our larger culture and it's unrealistic demands. The real question then isn't how to avoid these challenges, or how not to "catch PPD" or other "mood disorders," but how to approach this new phase of life in Motherhood with a growth mindset and the tools to weave oneself back together into the new you. And of course, she shares some tips for Dads and partners too! Topics covered include: - What does healthy reintegration look like? - The importance of connection & community - Allowing care and support to flow in - Shifting from a story of wounding to a story of wisdom - A journey of healing, celebrating, and claiming power - Compassion for the difficulty and suffering that can impact the process - The Surviving System vs Thriving System - and so much more! Quick links to Jennifer Summerfeldt's full range of offerings: Main page: https://www.jennifersummerfeldt.com Her books: https://www.jennifersummerfeldt.com/shop Ask Therapy: https://www.therapyformoms.ca Blog post on Postpartum Thriving: https://therapyformoms.substack.com/p/perinatal-mental-health-through-a ***** To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Jennifer Summerfeldt

Baby Talk with Katie & David
(Part 1) Perinatal Mental Health & Postpartum Thriving with Jennifer Summerfeldt - Part 1 of 2

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2022 77:15


This is the 1st of 2 episodes with Jennifer Summerfeldt - Perinatal Therapist and CEO of ASK Therapy, former doula and childbirth educator, and transformational coach. She shares her DEEP insight, compassion, and wisdom regarding the challenges and opportunities that come with childbirth and the postpartum space in our culture today. In this 1st half of our conversation about perinatal mental health we discuss: - The importance of understanding the power of the childbirth experience in shaping the trajectory of postpartum integration - Postpartum mood disorders are not simply "caught", like a virus, but instead can grow out of a rich complex of external factors and internal processes - Ounces of prevention heading into and through childbirth are powerful preventative measures for getting ahead of postpartum challenges - But beyond just support on the front end is the necessity of informed support for processing, metabolizing, and integrating all aspects of the Birth Story on the back end. - Postpartum Thriving isn't just about healing the body, but is about growth and transformation of the full being into Motherhood - The R's of Resources, Reflection, and Regulation for riding the waves of existential challenges - Co-regulation vs Self-soothing in the face of survival stress and disregulation - and so much more! Quick links to Jennifer Summerfeldt's full range of offerings: Main page: https://www.jennifersummerfeldt.com Her books: https://www.jennifersummerfeldt.com/shop Ask Therapy: https://www.therapyformoms.ca Blog post on Postpartum Thriving: https://therapyformoms.substack.com/p/perinatal-mental-health-through-a ***** To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Jennifer Summerfeldt  

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Katie & David: Friends, Family, and Festivity planning with new Baby

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2022 50:19


Katie rejoins the booth this week and together we share some tips for getting through the Holiday mayhem with your peace of mind intact and coming out the other side stronger. Topics covered include: - Healthy boundaries - "No" is a complete sentence - Intentional planning with your partner - Owning your needs, but looking for common ground - Baby is your wingman for easy outs - Creating your own new traditions - Cultivating allies to help you - and so much more! ***** To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels  

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Intentionality + Ownership = Empowerment w/ Aly McClain

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 7, 2022 42:44


Aly McClain is a certified Doula, Registered Nurse, and host of the Empowered Birth Podcast. Listen in this week as we dig into how intentionality and ownership can combine to create empowerment for a more successful childbirth, however you define it. Topics covered include: - Intentionality as first factor you can control - Owning that power and making choices and decisions from it leads to empowerment - Buy the hospital ticket, get the hospital ride - Communication & Connection - The importance of investing in you relationship - Meeting Dads where they are, and then guiding them for loving support ... and so much more! For more info on Aly check her out here: IG: @empoweredbirthpodcast Website: empoweredbirthpodcast.com Podcast: Empowered Birth Podcast on Spotify, Apple and Sticher ***** To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Aly McClain

Baby Talk with Katie & David
The Body Ready Method of preparing for Childbirth w/ Doula Jo Ann Bishop

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2022 55:15


The Body Ready Method is gaining in popularity in the Birth Space due to its explicit focus on helping pregnant Mamas prepare for an easier childbirth and recovery period through a combination of exercise, stretching, and movement focused on the core, back, and pelvic floor. Get ahead of the game, and set your future self up for success, by listening to Jo Ann and I explore this contribution to Bettering the Birth Space. Topics covered include: - The importance of ownership and empowerment approach to chidbirth preparation - Prenatal work is the best investment you can make now for better childbirth and postnatal outcomes later - The Body Ready Method - The importnance of 4th Trimester rest and recovery And so much more! Contact Jo Ann directly at joannbishopdoula@gmail.com Visit her here - https://joannbishopdoula.com ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Jo Ann Bishop

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Changing the "Language of Failure"

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2022 47:40


Katie is back in the booth this week with so much wisdom and grace to share on this topic that is so close to her heart. We talk about how the Language of Failure permeates the Birth Space and inherently undermines our collective aspirations for better experiences for everybody. We speak frankly about the complexity of the topic, the challenges of understanding all perspectives in and on childbirth in our culture, and the importance of providing encouragement, education, and empowerment into all our conversations around pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum. Specific topics covered include: - Importance of mindfullness of our language - Speaking up & taking ownership - Name to reframe - Navigating the invisible system of our culture - Importance for post-partum story-telling for connection, healing, and closure - The 4 Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz - https://www.miguelruiz.com - Ownership vs Overwhelm To learn more about Katie's FREE weekly Zoom Postpartum Support Group - Thursday's at 1pm PST, and David's FREE monthly Zoom Dad support group - last Thursday of the month at 6pm PST check us out here: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com/parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels

Baby Talk with Katie & David
The Power of Community with Amelia Protiva & Anja Health

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2022 57:02


My guest this week is Amelia Protiva, Certified Birth & Postpartum Doula and Head of Community over at Anja Health, a cord blood banking resource. Amelia particularly passionate about the positive power of community - in pregancy, childbirth, and into parenthood. Topics we cover today for Bettering the Birth Space include: - Doula mindset of partnership with all people in the birth team circle - Facilitating collaboration as the connecting motive - Epidemic of lonliness in pregancy and postpartum (men too!) - Cord Blood Banking - Her Better Birth Initiative in supporting Birthworkers through automating work flow, template library, and other business support - Connection, Continuity, and Community   Find out more about Amelia and her amazing work here below:   community.anjahealth.com instagram.com/ameliaprotiva linkedin.com/in/ameliaprotiva   ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Amelia Protiva

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Rehumanizing Childbirth with Anne Margolis and Home Sweet Homebirth

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 9, 2022 66:01


Anne Margolis is our featured guest today. She is a Certified Nurse Midwife with almost 30 years of experience, author, birth educator, Instagram maven, and so much more. We chat today all about how she has been working towards Bettering the Birth Space since before her first baby was born and how that first childbirth experience led to her to launching Home Sweet Homebirth and everything that has followed. Topics covered include: - Importance of rehumanizing the entire childbirth experience - How the Midwifery model of care renormalizes chidlbirth as beautiful and sacred - Home Sweet Homebirth is a mindset you take with you to wherever you give birth - The built in continuity of care that comes with Midwifery model of care - How Anne puts her Dad clients in the center of her practice next to Mama and Baby You can find out more about Anne and Home Sweet Homebirth at www.homesweethomebirth.com https://facebook.com/pages/Home-Sweet-Homebirth/112316658837166   https://instagram.com/homesweethomebirth   Free mini course to birth planning https://homesweethomebirth.com/gift/   Store for my online Guides to Pregnancy, Birth & Postpartum signature courses https://homesweethomebirth.retrieve.com/store/#/ ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Anne Margolis

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Trauma 101 - Prevention & Care in the Birth Space

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2022 49:12


Katie's back! She introduces the very important topic of Trauma in the Birth Space and shares her experiences in seeing how it shows up in her practice and how a big part of "Bettering the Birth Space" starts with more awareness on Trauma in general. Together we discuss: - Minimizing Trauma - Trauma-informed care - All Birth workers can hold space for trauma, regardless of their lane of expertise - Building Resilience -Post-traumatic Thriving - and so much more Important links from today's show: Dr. Gabor Mate - https://drgabormate.com Dr. John Vervaeke - https://www.meaningcrisis.co ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
The "Home Birth Mindset" with Matthew & Sarah Bivens from Doing It At Home

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2022 57:37


Matthew & Sarah Bivens from Doing It At Home have over 400 podcast episodes published on their show sharing stories, anecdotes, and interviews all about the homebirth expereince. But more than just an experience, "homebirth" is a mindset that puts you and your relationship at the center of the conversation as the true "home" you take with you wherever you go. Listen in this week as we cover: - Matthew & Sarah's  7-year journey in the homebirth space - How their ongoing 2nd pregnancy has been such a different journey than their 1st 7 years ago - Family focused care and the homebirth mindset - Your relationships with yourself and your partner are where the real work begins - Deepening your roots and building bridges of connection - and so much more! Reach out to them directly at: Doing It At Home book on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3vJcPmU DIAH Website: https://www.diahpodcast.com/ DIAH Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingitathome/ ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Matthew & Sarah Bivens

family amazon mindset reach creators nest deepening homebirth sarah bivens david arrell doing it at home
Baby Talk with Katie & David
Team Building and Connection with Doula Samantha Marvels

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2022 62:49


Our first guest in Season 2 is Samantha Marvels, a birth Doula, childbirth educator, and Doula agency owner working in Austin, TX. Samantha joins me today to discuss her work towards Bettering the Birth Space, how she works with her network to increase continuity of care for her clients, and how she treats her Dad clients from day 1 as an equal part of the birth team. We get into: - the role curiosity and intentionality each play in setting up the conditions for a better birth - the importance of "making things fun" as much as possible along the pregnancy journey - co-parenting can work for everybody - team building and connection - and so much more To learn more about Samantha and her work please reach out to her directly below at: Website/Social Media links:  @samanthamarvels – Instagram  Theaustindoula.com – Birth Agency  BirthPeople.com – Doula Training + Shop  ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Samantha Marvels

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Bettering the Birth Space

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2022 33:07


Welcome to Season 2 of Baby Talk with Katie & David! Our theme for this season is "Bettering the Birth Space," and here in episode 1 of Season 2 Katie and I talk a bit about what we each prioritize in that framing as well as share our "origin stories" for getting into birth work. Fun Fact: We'll be bringing in other birth professionals for interviews all season long to hear more from the front lines of how folks are "bettering the birth space" too! Here in Ep. 1 Katie and I discuss: - Katie's 2 focal points for bettering the birth space: -- Continuity of care from pregnancy through postpartum -- Normalizing the inherent power of childbirth, independent of the amount of drama and/or trauma that might be present. - David's 2 focal points:  -- Helping Dads-to-be and new Dads better connect to their partners & better prepare for what comes next - Katie's journey from starting as a postpartum doula to founding the Nest Family Resource Center 10 years ago where she is growing it today and tomorrow with online and onsite support for families in all phases of the pregnancy to parenthood journey David's story and creating Welcome To Fatherhood Our mutual focus on parenting and partnership, and much more! ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood! For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Own your power in pregnancy, parenthood, and partnership

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2022 46:06


"The System" is pretty great, except when it isn't. Where do you have choices and options? How can you build your birth team to best support you? How do you respond to our larger "culture of dismissal," and how should you respond when you catch yourself dismissing the expereinces of those around you? Join in this week as Katie & David discuss the "cultural conveyor belt" that is the standard pregnancy to parenthood journey and learn more about where you have the power to choose to do things differently. Topics covered include: - Dads and their expereince being ignored or dismissed is the "standard policy" of The System. - Moms too! - Owning your role and understanding your choices - Intentional Birth Team building - Your immediate culture of support is more important than The System - Culture coming to us vs coming through us - Invitations vs demands - Asking and offering a Redo is best practice to build on! ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Birthing a Parent

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2022 47:11


Baby's arrival heralds your birth into Parenthood and all the changes that come with it. Katie & David bring some interesting perspectives and anecdotes into this bigger conversation in this week's episode. Topics covered include: - The transformative impact of Baby's arrival - Hormones add volume - The myth of consistency - Change being the only constant - Weekly check ins & clean ups - Getting ahead of resentment - Culture of dismissal - Mothers' deeper connections with Baby - Curiosity vs Anxiety - Sharing experiences vs solving problems ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Sacred Individuality

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2022 41:58


What things connect and support your core identity, your "Sacred Individuality" underneath the new roles and responsibilities that can take over your life once Baby gets here? How can you "bounce forward" into Thriving and stay connected to these core parts of your identity? Listen in this week as Katie & David chat about this Sacred Individuality and how it needs to be seen and supported as a key ingredient in any effort for Thriving. Topics covered include: - Balancing roles and responsibilities with active self care - Avoiding getting stuck in the "woulds and shoulds" - Obligations vs offerings - Give and take of self care - Buliding your village of support - Intention + Curiosity = Thriving - and much more! ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

The Doula Road Trip Podcast
85 Doulas, WTF! (Welcome To Fatherhood) Feat. DAvid Arrell

The Doula Road Trip Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2022 52:07


Heyyy Doulas! Today we welcome special guest DAvid Arrell to the podcast. DAvid, is a husband, father, author and Dad Coach who is sharing his best tips for Doulas supporting Dads! Check out his latest book- https://www.amazon.com/Welcome-Fatherhood-Pregnancy-Childbirth-Fatherhood/dp/B08GFX3PRR www.welcometofatherhood.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Finding joy & letting go of perfection

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2022 42:31


This week Katie & David talk all about the challenges of finding joy in the moment, and how letting go of perfection is a great first step in that direction. Topics covered include: The phrase "All joy, no fun" No one right way to do anything, especially in finding joy The need to drop our "woulds and shoulds" and connect to the present moment Our own "inner high chair" mindset and how it never helps You can't struggle your way to joy Cultivating joy, and then sharing it Intention and attention = joy ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Trust & Vulnerability in Postpartum

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2022 45:38


Katie & David discuss the importance of establishing trust across relationships in early Postpartum, especially with Dad, support partners,  and other folks in your Village. Vulnerability and emotional intimacy are extra important here, tune in to hear more about: Agreements & accountability Self reliance & community How to show up in helpful ways Simply being present Baby resets the ground rules Relationship thriving in Postpartum ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K Photo credit: Pexels.com

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Infant Feeding Pt 2 - Partners, Pumping, and Planning Ahead

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2022 52:25


Katie & David continue the infant feeding conversation from last week and get into partner support, pumping, and planning ahead. Topics discussed include: Pumping basics Pumping as a part of breastfeeding plan and tool for success Pump types and reasons for choosing them Looking for the funny as a way to get comfortable Great way for Dads to pitch in and help Bouncing forward into new reality Dad Tips for feeding success Shift sleeping Health consciousness vs size consciousness Comfort cart basics for Dads  Back to work and pumping options Teamwork is the plan ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K   Episode Artwork: Parenthood photo created by wayhomestudio - www.freepik.com    

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Infant Feeding Pt 1 - Breastfeeding Basics

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2022 40:44


Katie & David talk about infant feeding and planning for breastfeeding success. Topics discussed include: Breastfeeding - the expanded definition Feeding Baby, Protect milk production, breastfeed Connection and comfort Feeding challenges and the Birth Story Birth Team and continuity of care Better support systems lead to better outcomes Paths to success Raising a human, not managing an inconvenience Radical Acceptance and committing to the cause Dad support tips and tricks Take each moment as they come, one day at a time Make plans, but hold them lightly ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Wired to Connect

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2022 46:08


Katie & David discuss the amazing instincts of newborns, specifically those that support connection. Topics include: The dance of Nature and Nurture Love and connection are crucial needs Warm, safe, predictable environments Baby cues and responses Connect with Baby, and let them connect with you Eye contact and hand to hand touch Imitation and syncing up Active environment vs passive screen time Dad Zone play ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Postpartum Thriving - Relationships

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2022 38:29


Katie & David explore Postpartum Thriving and how relationships fit into the picture. Topics covered include: Managing expectations Connection and compassion Space and Grace for each other Dude Zone to Dad Zone It's not forever, just for right now Obligation vs opportunity Dads feeling left out, 3rd wheel, and deprioritized with Baby now on the scene Bouncing forward, not bouncing back It's a whole new relationship as co-parents and partners in care Gentle touches and grey zones Leaning into Love Languages Humor is helpful Staying human, staying compassionate, staying connected as a team ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Postpartum Thriving - Self Care

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2022 43:38


Katie & David discuss Postpartum thriving by focusing on Self Care. Topics discussed include: "Bouncing forward" vs "bouncing back" Shuffling priorities and focusing on basic needs Name it to tame it, name and reframe Take a breath and make a shift The art of radical acceptance Co-parenting and compassion Fathers don't Mother Dads getting involved from day 1 Short self care moments Thoughts aren't facts, and this too shall pass Enjoy the small moments, invest in them to draw upon later Sharing the care, letting go of control ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Postpartum Boundaries

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2022 52:55


Katie & David talk all about creating and enforcing healthy boundaries in late pregnancy and postpartum. Topics discussed include: Helpful Villagers vs Baby Tourists How to ask for help, and how to receive it Picking your team, and assigning their roles Looking for win-win-win Dads and partners Fixing vs holding space Code words Ground rules and chore lists "No" is your friend, and focusing on Baby ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   To meet with Katie DaMota and find out more about Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Katie & David explore the Babymoon timeframe and what you can do to have the best one possible. Topics covered include: Babymoon basics The womb to world transition Lavish Sisterhood, Limit Stuff Dad Tips and the Protect & Serve mantra Postpartum doulas and other helpful villagers Meal trains Code words, communication, and co-parenting ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
The Birth Story

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2022 49:24


Join in as Katie and David explore the big topic of the "Birth Story". Topics discussed include: What is the Birth Story, and why its important to think about it before heading into childbirth. Set yourself up for creating one that unites you and your partner as a great team as you head into the adventure of being parents together. Dad's role and how to win the Best Supporting Actor award. Combining flexibility to adapt to changing birthing circumstances with resilience in maintaining a sense of ownership over your choices. What you can do to avoid turning drama into trauma. Processing a difficult Birth Story. Code words, communication, and co-parenting. ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Baby Talk with Katie & David
Season 1 Trailer

Baby Talk with Katie & David

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2022 6:28


Welcome to your source for practical and experience-based discussions on babies, births, pregnancy, and early parenthood. Listen in each week as Katie DaMota, a postpartum doula and IBCLC-certified lactation consultant, and David Arrell, Men's Coach and author of Welcome To Fatherhood, get together and bring real world experience and authentic voices to all things Baby. Get straight talk, down home perspectives, interesting experts, and honest opinions on real questions, concerns, challenges, and successes that come up frequently along the pregnancy to parenthood journey. ***** Like what we have to say? Subscribe to the channel, like this show, and come see us over at the Nest and Welcome To Fatherhood!   For more information on Katie DaMota and Nest Family Resource please visit: https://www.thenestfamilyresource.com   For more information on David Arrell, his book Welcome To Fatherhood, and his other coaching and consulting offerings please visit: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com   ***** Podcast music credit for The Road Ahead: Music from Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/zoo/the-road-ahead License code: YQSX0VF4MX6S3N8K

Pregnancy & Birth Made Easy
My Essential Birth Podcast Ep.123| Welcome to Fatherhood

Pregnancy & Birth Made Easy

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 11, 2022 43:01


In this podcast episode we are interviewing David Arrell who is a dad, consultant and men's coach. He turned author with his book,  "Welcome to Fatherhood", in which he consolidates the lessons learned from his experience being a dad for the first time. Through the book, David encourages men to more actively step into their supportive roles during pregnancy, childbirth, and the fourth trimester back home and gives them detailed and practical tips and techniques on how to do so.

The Postpartum Coach Podcast
Honoring your Husband's Fatherhood Postpartum + New Dad Tips w/Author David Arrell

The Postpartum Coach Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 30, 2021 30:33


David Arrell is author of the book Welcome to Fatherhood: A Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth and Fatherhood. In today's episode he speaks to dads at any stage, as well as us moms... Tune in to hear a guy's perspective, and be sure to send this one to your spouse. Buy his book HERE. David's site HERE. Work with Lizzie HERE.    

My Doula's Podcast
Episode 58: Interview with David Arrell Author of Welcome to Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood.

My Doula's Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2021 81:39


Join us as we speak with David Arrell, Author of Welcome to Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood. We spoke with David about the Dad/Partner experience during the birth journey. David took his own experiences, reflected on those, and wrote the book that he needed during that time. David shares practical tips and tricks for connection and specific ways you can be a helpful and supportive partner during pregnancy, postpartum, and everything in-between. Website: www.welcometofatherhood.com

The PUSH Revolution Podcast
E62 WTF: Welcome To Fatherhood with David Arrell

The PUSH Revolution Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2021 53:52


Welcome To Fatherhood, otherwise known as WTF! Author and dad David Arrell shares his tips on getting dads and dads-to-be more involved in pregnancy, labor, birth, and postpartum. Check out David on https://www.welcometofatherhood.com  www.postpartumPUSH.com https://www.instagram.com/postpartum.push/ https://www.facebook.com/thepushrevolution

Doing It At Home: Our Home Birth Podcast
349: Welcome to Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood with David Arrell

Doing It At Home: Our Home Birth Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 6, 2021 50:41


How can fathers be prepared and support mothers during the pregnancy and birth experiences? This is the crux of David Arrell's work as he helps partners to be helpful, supportive, involved and all the other great adjectives that benefit both parents. So this episode is absolutely one to have your partner listen to - either on their own or listen together as a couple. We break down how fathers can be prepared for what lies ahead and some tips for creating a team approach. Remember the manta: attentive, calm and competent! Things we talk about in this episode: support for dads and partners for pregnancy and birth, different roles for a birth partner, how to educate birth partners Links: David's website: https://www.welcometofatherhood.com/ Our website: https://www.diahpodcast.com/ Facebook Group: https://bit.ly/3jKtIYv Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/diahpodcast/ DIAH YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGoKeBfEZ143sWU7V9I5Gdg DIAH Store: https://yoursuccessfulhomebirth.com/ DIAH Merch: https://bit.ly/3qhwgAe  Donate to DIAH: https://bit.ly/3qgm4r9

The Birth Hour
Partner Podcast Preview Clip - David Arrell

The Birth Hour

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 1, 2021 6:36


This is a preview of our Partner Podcast series from The Birth Hour. These episodes release every Friday for our listener supporters at the $10+ level via Patreon. Go to patreon.com/birthhour to become a patron and receive access to these weekly partner episodes as well as other bonuses such as access to over 350 archived episodes, membership in our private Facebook group, and other bonus content. We are so appreciative of your support!

partner david arrell
Birth Story Podcast
91 WELCOME TO FATHERHOOD BOOK WITH AUTHOR DAVID ARRELL ON PREGNANCY AND BIRTH STORY FROM HIS PERSPECTIVE

Birth Story Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 16, 2021 84:55


SHOW NOTES COMING

The VBAC Link
179 David Arrell Welcome to Fatherhood (WTF) Tips for Dads!

The VBAC Link

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 2, 2021 47:05


Dads are constantly flooded with messages to be helpful and supportive to their birthing partner, but where are those specific tips on how to do just that?Cue David Arrell. David has developed a passion for everything surrounding birth with his main focus centered around helping dads learn the things he wished he knew when he became a dad for the first time. According to his own words, “I am just a dude who has been through this journey.”With his very specific dad tips as well as big ideas, David's advice will take your birth support partner from feeling clueless, guilty, and overwhelmed to feeling hopeful, empowered, and inspired. When both partners learn to be a strong team during pregnancy, their bond during labor and throughout parenting will thrive even more.And the tip that gets 100% of his recommendation? “Dude, Hire a Doula.”Additional linksThe VBAC Link on Apple PodcastsDavid's website: Welcome to FatherhoodWelcome to Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and FatherhoodFull transcriptNote: All transcripts are edited to correct grammar, false starts, and filler words. Meagan: Happy, happy Wednesday everybody. This is Meagan and Julie. You are listening to The VBAC Link. You are going to be excited just like we are for this episode today, so make sure you are somewhere where you can hear all the words, and honestly, you probably want your birth partners to list them as well. We have David Arrell. He is an author, entrepreneur, consultant, and men's coach currently in Colorado. We have actually had quite a few special guests in Colorado which is really fun. He is passionate about coaching men on how to more fully embrace and embody help, masculinity, and especially through the powerful modalities of partnership. His most recent work-- now I can't speak.Julie: Sorry.Meagan: You're fine. --in this area is a book and we have the book. We are so excited. It's called Welcome to Fatherhood and I really like it because it is like “WTF”.Julie: WTF.Meagan: Through the whole thing, it's the modern man's guide to pregnancy, childbirth, and fatherhood better known as WTF. So this is really a big deal because in so many ways, and I even talk about this with my doula clients. There are so many things in pregnancy that are so woman-focused or birther-focused, right? We kind of forget sometimes about dad and his role. That's, as the doula, so important for me not to forget that and make sure that dad doesn't feel that because I remember the day in my second labor. I remember my husband had to sleep on the couch in the corner and everyone coming in not addressing him, not talking to him, not saying anything that's happening, not asking him has an opinion on anything, and it only revolves around me, and so I just think this is so awesome. A lot of dads enter childbirth clueless not because they don't want to know, but because people don't include them, right?And then fatherhood. I also know that as a mom and my husband, we've had times where I'm like, “No. I am doing it right and he is doing it wrong.” I remember someone saying, “You are both doing it right. You are doing it your way,” and I loved that. So I am really excited to talk to him today and get to know more about his book, and the role, and the fourth trimester coming back home, and how to give these tips to these dads because they need them.Julie: I was just going to jump in and say, “I love this,” because David, our guest today, literally wrote the book for dads about the fourth trimester, what to do when you get home with baby, well, I mean, it is for pregnancy, and childbirth, and fourth trimester, right? So that's the first three months after the baby is born. It's from a dad‘s perspective. He gets it. He has been there. That's what me and Meagan really like about it because, at The VBAC Link, we are doulas, but we have also had VBACs. We have been there. We get you. I feel like he is right on our level, but talking to the dads because yes, like Meagan said, dads, a lot of time, get forgotten. I wish my husband would've had something like this back when we started into parenting because he was completely oblivious about pregnancy, and birth, and everything. I dragged him to a HypnoBirthing class but that's about it, and now he knows way more about birth than he ever thought he would ever have dreamed to know about, but this is going to be really helpful. So we are excited. We have asked our social media followers questions. We have some questions for him. Review of the WeekJulie: But anyway, before I keep talking, holy cow. Let me read a Review of the Week.This is from Natalie in San Diego. It is on Apple Podcasts and she says, “I am SO thankful I found this podcast. I've always wanted a vaginal birth and felt like I could never get one after my C-section in 2018. I started listening to this podcast when I got pregnant (currently 28 weeks) and then I asked my provider if I was a good candidate and she said, ‘No.'”Dang it. Oh my gosh. Sorry. That kind of caught me off guard. That was probably a little bit of an inappropriate laugh. That's what I do when I get caught off guard. I laugh inappropriately. All right, let's see.“She said, ‘No,' so I resigned to the fact that I would need a RCS with this pregnancy and stopped listening for about a month but the nagging feeling that I could ask more questions and advocate for myself more just never went away. I started listening again and realized that so many women switch providers late in the game so why couldn't I? After requesting my post-op report and asking my OB more questions, I realized that I am a good candidate and that she just wasn't supportive, so at 26 weeks I switched to an amazingly supportive provider here in San Diego, hired a doula, and signed up for HypnoBirthing!” Hey, speaking of HypnoBirthing…“I'm doing everything I can to educate myself and am so hopeful for a VBAC this April or early May.”Oh my gosh, maybe like right now.“I wouldn't have had the courage to do any of this without the stories from the women on this podcast so thank you!!!”Do you like my commentary? I don't think I can read a review without jumping in and putting my own thoughts into the review. Anyway, talk about being long-winded. Okay so, thank you for the review. We love reviews. You already know that if you haven't had a chance yet, please go leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or Google or Facebook. Wherever you leave us a review, it will help us reach other people, so if you enjoy the podcast and think everybody should have a listen, definitely go ahead and give us a review in whichever is in the easiest place for you to do so.Q&A with David ArrellMeagan: Okay, David. We are excited to dive in with you. We have questions and all these things that we want to ask you, but I would love to invite you to share a little bit more about your book because I know I just went right through it. But tell us more. What inspired you to do this?David: Sure. Thanks for having me on, ladies. I really appreciate it. I think part of my inspiration was the gap that I experienced as a guy who has really committed to trying to be that “helpful and supportive partner” and I thought I was doing all the things. As our first pregnancy, and then ultimately the labor and delivery, and then that first experience for us of that fourth trimester, I have looked back and I realized there are so many opportunities where I wish I had done some things a little bit differently, but I realized I didn't get the information, or the education or the encouragement that I felt would have helped me be that much more helpful and supportive for my wife during her pregnancy, and childbirth, and coming back home. So I looked around and even the birth classes I took, the amazing doula we worked with, which I will circle back to later, and some of the books I read, there just wasn't that sort of succinct, clear sort of discussion of some of the things that are really important for us guys to really get a better sense of. And also, just some specific things like, “Hey, guys. Really think about doing this,” or “If you did this one thing a little bit differently, you might have more success.” So that was my main inspiration. It was to pave the path a little easier for the guys coming after me who are going to be going through their own sort of pregnancy adventure.Meagan: Love it. Love it. You know, I have a client, a husband, who started a podcast. Kind of the same thing. He was just like, “After the first birth experience, I just realized there was so much more that dads needed to know,” so I love what you guys are doing. This is going to be awesome. So are you ready for the list of questions? Julie, I don't know if you want to go back and forth, but we have a list of questions that some of our followers have asked. Julie: Yeah.Meagan: if you don't mind, I would love to jump into those.Julie: Let's do it.David: Sure. Let's jump right in.Meagan: Perfect. Okay, so number one is: Best advice for husbands to support wife in labor? I know you talk about pregnancy a lot in your book too. You talk about all of it, all the trimesters, but we are going to jump right into labor. Best advice for husbands to support their wives in labor?David: Sure. The way I describe that journey though, going into labor, is if the pregnancy is a rollercoaster going up the hill, slowly working its way to the top, once you realize, “Oh wow. We are really in labor,” that's when that rollercoaster crests the hill and goes zooming down the other side. It's a very different sort of immediacy for all parties concerned.The main thing I tell the guys out there is Big Idea #10 in the book. The book has Big Ideas and Dad Tips. But Big Idea #10 is that your new mantra is to be attentive, be calm, and be competent. At the end of the day, regardless of all the other things going on, if you as the dad, the partner, perhaps the most important support partner in the room here, if you can maintain that mantra and really be attentive to mama and all of the things that are happening for her whether it's holding a hand, or rubbing a brow, or adjusting a position for more comfort, or be calm.There are definitely times I know in my wife's childbirth and some of the guys I talk to also where things get a little active, but still, for us guys, we have to be calm. We have to be that rock in the storm of the emotions and feelings for our partners to connect to. And then being competent. This comes down to feeling like you have done the work ahead of time with the education and the practice where you feel pretty good about what your role is, what it's not, and how to really show up as that competent person throughout this process. So that's the mantra. Be attentive, be calm, and be competent.Meagan: Yes. I love that. You know, something that happened in one of my labors-- I have had three babies and my third baby, my labor was 40--Julie: Are you going to tell the story about the pillow? You should tell the pillow story.Meagan: Oh no, but I should. 42-hour long laborDavid: Wow.Meagan: My husband had a not-so-supportive moment where I was doing my thing in my zone. Sometimes we moan. That's what we do. Our uterus is the strongest muscle in our body and it's contracting around a baby really hard. It doesn't feel awesome so you have to work through it, right? He totally shoved a pillow in my face and told me to muffle myself because he and the other kids were trying to sleep.Julie: I think that Rick needs a copy of your book.Meagan: I know. But there was a moment in my labor and I had been laboring for a really, really really, long time, and what had happened that I just still to this day will remember the feeling that came over me. All he did was touch my back and lean into me, kind of just grazed around my head and my shoulders, and it was a complete moment of, “I am not alone in this,” even though I knew I wasn't alone. I had a great team. Just that touch was exactly what I needed and like you said, it could be a touch of a brow, or an adjustment, or just being there. It was just amazing. So I would not disagree at all with that.David: I'm glad he bounced back. That's good. That's good.Meagan: Yeah. Yeah. Between that and then when he looked at me and was like, “Remember, this is what you wanted.” I was like, “This is not what you say to me right now.”David: Well, that's the trick. So many of us guys get these-- the general vibe is we are told to be helpful and supportive.Meagan: But you don't know how.David: But we are not given explicit instruction beyond that and so we guess, and then we guess wrong, and we get frustrated, and so that's exactly it. It's the different challenges that we go through and the learning curves that can be really steep sometimes.Meagan: Absolutely.Julie: Yeah. I get that. Do you know what's so funny? While you were just talking, we are actually going to make the link to where you can go and buy David's book Welcome to Fatherhood and the link, I just had to say this because it is so funny. The link is going to be thevbaclink.com/wtf. So we will make it super easy for you to go and find his book.Meagan: I love it.David: Exactly. That sentiment is very popular.Julie: I mean, yes. You started at Tip #10, right? So I am just like, “Yeah. It's really good stuff.” I haven't read all of it, but I have skimmed through it and I have had my husband skim as well and there is some really good stuff here. So we are going to put it in the show notes. This is normally what we would do at the end of the episode, but I just had to say it. I am making the link right now. So anyway. Great stuff.I remember my husband felt helpless too. For my Cesarean birth, he still says it was the scariest moment in his life. Watching me on the operating room table, not knowing if I was okay, not knowing if baby was okay and I'm sure he would have really appreciated this type of advice to help him because men instinctively have this nature to support their partners and fix the problem, right? They want to be strong and they want to be able to comfort them, and childbirth is such a foreign concept that it can really-- what are the words I'm looking for? It can really just, it's not familiar to you. So you don't really know what to do and it can cause birth partners sometimes to feel a little hung up, and uncertain, and unsure, so just giving them these tools, like you talked about, and telling them what to do-- yeah. You are supposed to be supportive of your wife during labor, but this is how you do that. I think it's so valuable. It's so valuable. So I really appreciate that.Oh, next question. I guess that's on me.David: Well, let me jump in with one quick thing here.Meagan: Sure.David: One of the challenges as guys I have seen happen in my experience and some of my buddies is that we get into the labor and delivery and like you mentioned, it's overwhelming, it's a novel experience, but then also, that sort of fix-it vibe just doesn't work. There's nothing for us to fix. Our partners are maybe going through some pretty intense experiences and sensations, and we are just sort of supposed to be-- you know, we feel very helpless sometimes. I remember at one point, my wife was squeezing my head really hard and she was really having a challenging series of contractions there and I just felt so helpless. And so that's where I think this mantra comes in, but I definitely wanted to touch base on one other thing. I think it's one of the Dad Tips that I am very strong on. Most of them are recommendations, but this one, I am very strong on and that's Dad Tip #7: “Dude, Hire a Doula.”Julie: Yes.David: That would get 100% of my recommendation energy. Some of them are 60, 70, does this work for you? But dude, hire a doula. That doula is going to be your wingman too. Not just your partner's, but your wingman to really help you. They can give you some tips. They can give you some direction. They can help normalize some of the beeping and some of the other things that are going on. Again, I can circle back to this a little bit later, but that's definitely what will help you focus on your job which is to be that supportive partner. Most dads out there are not birth professionals, so you can just focus on your partner and your mantra, and let your doula really help adjust you as necessary. So I didn't want to skip over that Dad Tip #7: “Dude. Hire a Doula.” Please.Julie: I love that you said that. It reminds me of an article I read a long time ago. I think it was called, Just Hire the Damn Doula. It was a blog.David: Perfect.Julie: it was a dad‘s perspective and he was just like, “This is why you need a doula. Do you know what to do when she is at 4 centimeters and she's only been there for three hours? No, you don't. Do you know how much blood is normal? No, you don't. Do you know what positions to do to help or what labor positions to help encourage baby to descend? No, you don't know that.” He was just like, “You just need a doula.” Anyway, that was a really broad explanation of the article, but I love that. As a doula myself, I make my clients' partners be present at their prenatal visits because it's really important to me to not only get to know the dynamic of their relationship so I can better strengthen that during the labor process, but also so I can get to know the dad and how to support him because doulas are also for dads. I know a lot of times they think, “Oh yeah, doulas are just for the mom, but we are here just as much for you guys to help you know how to best support your partner. The best feeling in the whole world is right after the baby is born and then the dad comes over and gives me a great big hug and I am totally not a hugger. Like as I doula, I can put my hug face on and I can hug if people want touch and stuff, but by nature, I am not a hugger. But when a dad comes and grabs me off my feet-- I just remember this one particular moment. He spins me around and he is like, “Thank you so much.” This was after a VBAC birth and I was just like, “Wow. This is really cool.” It is just really extra special when the dads say those kinds of things.Every dad is a little bit different, but I really appreciate that you say that. I think it's important because a lot of times, dads think that doulas will replace them, but really, a good doula will really work on enhancing your relationship in knowing how to better support your wife. Okay, ready for the next question?David: Sure.Julie: All right. So I don't know. We kind of have already talked about this. I think there might be some overlap a little bit in some of these things, but you have got lots of great tips and advice in your book, so I am sure that we are not even going to scratch the surface into that, but the question is: What do you tell men to do to support women during pregnancy?David: The subtitle of the book is “Better connected, better prepared.” And so I think that focus really helps shape some of the suggestions that follow in that envelope and that's what is so important. I think some of the dads out there-- I know for me, that connecting bit was tricky because my experience of pregnancy is sort of like it's happening over there whereas, for my wife and every other person who has been pregnant, it's literally the biggest deal ever. It's like, “No. This is now. I am already a mom. I am monitoring my vitamins, and sushi, and which cheese I should eat,” and all of these different things. That sense of motherhood is very real but whereas for us dads, a lot of times, we don't think we are dads until the baby gets here.So one of the things I think that's important to remember is that both of those truths are true for each person, but for us dads, there is plenty of opportunity for us to reach over and really try to better connect with mama and her experiences, and just knowing how real and important that is, is a great first step to putting that as a top-tier priority rather than just sort of like, “Oh yeah. We are pregnant and the baby will be here in a couple of months,” kind of thing.So there are so many things you can do as the dad to really get in there. I mentioned hiring a doula is a great thing, a birth class where are you are excited and you want to take on that. You're just as excited about the birth class as mama is. That's a great way to really foster that connection where you are going through that together and learning about it together. Another thing I like are some of these pregnancy tracking apps where-- I know my wife and I really enjoyed each week, as the pregnancy progressed, sitting down and watching the five or ten-minute little video about what's happening this week. Some of them are pretty funny. They compare the size of a growing baby to French pastries or random, exotic animals, and so we would laugh about how baby is the size of a hedgehog this week or the size of a croissant, a big one.So those things where you're really connecting with mama and really doing your part to get really on the inside of her journey as well, all of those things are great ideas because at the end of the day, the goal is to really have that relationship be really strong and vibrant as you are going through the delivery, and then you come home for that fourth trimester because now you're parents together. Now is not the time to figure out how to be a team. Being a team starts during that pregnancy.Meagan: Yes, yes. Love that. I love that. If you can walk in as a team, into parenthood, it's just going to set yourself up so much better.Julie: And can I just say, dad? Even if you don't love the whole “baby is the size of a kumquat” thing, just pretend you do.David: Exactly.Julie: Just pretend.David: Exactly.Julie: Just fake it until you make it.Meagan: Or if the class that you are taking is HypnoBabies or HypnoBirthing and you're like, “Oh, this is really weird,” try your hardest to get in there. I know sometimes it is far-fetched or far out there and it's like, “This is so strange,” but this is something that she may have picked that resonated with her to help her cope through this labor journey, and crazy enough, it will connect. Like when you said, “Take childbirth education classes,” it will connect you two together so much more and help you in all stages.Julie: I love it.David: Exactly. It's funny, I've heard some dad say, “Well, I am not having a baby, you are.” Like, discussing this with their partners about these different things and you know, not that they are adamant about it, but that's their reality and I'm like, “Yeah dads. I get it.” Having a baby is a huge deal. I mean, it's easy for some guys to think, “Well, that's how all of us got here. There may be one or two test-tube babies running around, but we all got here this way,” and it's like, well, this is the first-time experience or second-time experience for your partner. This is a very huge deal. Don't look at it in the abstract. Look at it in the concrete. Your partner is excited and enthusiastic, as are you. It's meaningful. It's a little bit scary. There's a lot of uncertainty. Really get in there to be that supportive partner by connecting with her and her journey rather than sort feeling like you need to stay on your side of the fence in your journey. So that connection piece is so important.Julie: Great life advice too.Meagan: Yeah. Yeah, seriously. You know what? Are you going to write the next one on marriage? Because all of these tips-- this is also how to have a really great date. Julie: We're taking notes. I'll give it to my husband. I'll be like, “Read this. Just kidding.”David: That all becomes so much more pressing once baby gets here. I am a terrible illustrator but if I had any skill, I would have drawn a little series of two stick figures: mama, dada, and then a little small tiny baby stick figure. This is what you think it's going to be, and then the second one would have been the same size mama, dada, and then this giant Michelin Manbaby illustration like, this is the impact of a new baby on your lives. It is not this third thing that joins you.Meagan: It's not tiny.David: No. It's just the middle and the center of everything.Meagan: Yes.David: So now is the time to forge those teammate bonds.Meagan: Love that.Julie: Yes, absolutely.Meagan: Love that. Okay, so this is a hard one because sometimes I know it can be daunting when you are in the birth room and in labor and stuff, but it says: Do you encourage men to stand up for their wives' wishes during labor and birth? And I'm going to add on to that one and say: If you do, what do you feel like is the best way for a dad to say, “Okay. I know she didn't want this. I am going to try to make sure that we go about this a different way”?David: Well, my first answer is yes, absolutely. Dad is the main support person looking out for the bigger picture. I know there were times in my wife's-- especially with our first baby where she couldn't hear anybody else in the room. She couldn't see anybody else, hear anybody else. It was sort of that fugue state that some women go through and she needed me to basically repeat everything that the doula was asking or our OB was asking.So yes, you need to be fully connected there. This circles back to-- I mentioned a doula already, but having that really trusted birth team where both mama and dada can really feel like their birth team is on the same page with you. They are looking out for your best interest and baby's best interest obviously as well. But that birth team coming in, as I mentioned before, most dads aren't going to be birth professionals, but that's where that birth team comes in.So to whatever degree you can start with that team, really be all on the same page. We have gone over the birth preferences. We understand where we want to go with this whether it's what types of pain management we want to use, with breathing, or massage, or etc. But there are times where things might get a little tricky.Like for example, during our first birth, we had a very low intervention birth, no pain medications, and at one point, my wife was struggling a little bit. They wanted to put an oxygen mask on her face and she did not want that. She was trying to swat it away and I felt like I needed to go with her wishes rather than whatever the nurse was trying to do. And so I gently removed the oxygen mask from her face. I looked at both our doula as well as the OB and I am like, “if she doesn't absolutely need this right now, then it's only going to cause her more duress and anxiety to be fighting off this mask which is not what we are looking for.” And they both agreed. But that was on me to not just sort of automatically go with whatever is happening, but to remind them of what our plan was.So again, absolutely stand up for those wishes during the labor and birth. The more you are on the same page with both your wife or your partner and that birth team ahead of time, the easier it is for you to do that because you are not worrying about somebody coming in and trying to change the birth plan, or there is a shift change and a new OB comes in and they have a different idea or they haven't read your birth preferences, so the more you're clear about that as a team, I think the easier it is for us guys to be less focused on being an intervention blocker and more focused on being that supportive teammate with our mantra of being attentive, and calm, and competent, focusing on our birthing partner and being supportive for her.Meagan: Yes. I love that. So tell me, I am trying to think how to ask this. What tips would you give for those dads who are very medical-minded? and trust-- I don't want this to sound negative. My husband is very much like, “What the doctor says, we do because the doctor is the professional. He went to school. He knows it.” But then there are also times where I am like, “But that's really not what I want and I have researched differently.”He told me that he felt like I put him in a really hard place because he was like, “I feel like I was against you and the doctor because I believed what the doctor was saying but you wanted something more. I wanted to make you happy, but I wanted to do what he said because I was worried.” Do you know what I mean? What tip, if you have any, specifically for that type of situation where we have got a dad who doesn't know how to navigate that feeling that they have?David: I think you hit a really, that's a really perfect space because that's where it can be so tricky for us guys. Especially if we have had some experiences in the past where doctors have been helpful or if we have had experiences in the past where they have been unhelpful. We are bringing our own stuff into this equation also. And I think, I know doulas are explicitly focused on the non-medical aspects of all of that birth, but having a doula with you where you can at least have a consultant. It's okay in about 98% of the circumstances to say, “You know what? I need to think about this for a minute.”Julie: Yes.David: I mean, if it's not an emergency, emergency, then you can always ask for a few minutes. You can try to speak with your partner depending on her level of awareness, and consciousness, and interest in the topic, and your doula as well, or even phone a friend. But you usually have time.Sometimes I find that those circumstances relax a little bit when you create some time around them to really sit with it and check-in with your partner. “I know our birth preferences. We wanted to do A. They are really recommending B. What should we, can we wait a few minutes? Do we need to decide now?” Because things can change pretty quickly in a birth and sometimes waiting, things sort of tend to clarify both whether it's the circumstances shift, or the answer that you are working with shifts, or your agreement around the answer shifts.So I would say, look for more time to let things settle or simmer a little bit more before you make a decision. If you don't need to make it right that second, then look for some time. That will usually help the consensus clarify where you're not feeling like you're being pushed into making a decision because nobody likes that sense of being rushed into a decision especially if it doesn't need to be made right that second.Julie: Yeah.Meagan: Love it. Love it, love it, love it. Time. Okay.Julie: Absolutely. Great advice.Meagan: All right, Julie. You are on the next question.Julie: All right. These last two made me chuckle. Okay.How do you convince your husband to read this book and be a better support?Meagan: Yeah.David: You know, that's a great question. I joke sometimes that-- this material, I started offering in a workshop format, an in-person workshop.Julie: That's cool.David: The challenge was that the guys who most needed the workshop were the ones that were actually the most oblivious to the fact that they needed the workshop.Julie: Yeah.David: So well, I think there are a couple things I will mention. One, this book is not like many of the other books out there. Some of the books out there are 500 pages. They are very encyclopedic which is great for the guys that really want to get into those details of the changes mama is going through, the developmental trajectory of baby, but for guys who aren't interested in that, it's just all starts to sound like Charlie Brown's teacher. It's like, “Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.” And they're like, “God, what am I supposed to do? Where is the part where it says, ‘do this?'”Julie: Yeah.David: So that's the book I wrote. These are some specific things you can do at various times in the pregnancy, and labor, and even the fourth trimester. All the dad tips. There are 28 of them in there, but each of them are very specific for that time period. Dad Tip #, randomly, #2 is knowing the baby's age in weeks. The baby is not four months. You probably wouldn't know it at five weeks, but they are 12 weeks, or 15 weeks, or 17 weeks. That is relevant early on, but that falls away once you are in labor and delivery. It doesn't matter how many weeks you are at this point. So those are very specific things. That's what the book is built on. It is built on these very specific dad tips as well as these big ideas that helps shape your understanding.I joked with you earlier that one of the early subtitles I was playing around was, “All the things I wish I did better the first time.”Julie: Yeah. I know. We could all write a book like that.David: Right. Right. But that's kind of the goal is like, I want the guys out there to have a chance to read this and their list, which, there will be a list of things they wished they did better the first time, or even the second time, or third time. I want that list to be shorter than mine.So that's where it is coming from. It's not another, “You are doing it wrong” kind of book and it's not super encyclopedic. It's short. It's sweet. It's pretty much to the point. It's written by, I am just a dude who has been through this journey. I talk a little bit. It's straight talk. I have done a great job in not cursing on the podcast, but there are some curse words mixed in there, a little salt and pepper, because when us guys get joking around, sometimes our language flows a little bit more freely.That's how the book is written. It's not preachy. It's not, again, like I mentioned, not a “You are doing it wrong” book. It's like, “Hey man. Yeah. This is challenging. It's tough and sometimes it's really hard.” One of the early big ideas is what I call the “Dude Zone to Dad Zone and Avoiding the Dud Zones”.Meagan: Yeah, I was going to say I saw that in there. “Avoiding the Dud Zones”. Yes.David: Yeah. The two dud zones I talk about-- I talk about the journey you are on. I tell the guys, “You don't know it, but right now you're on this journey from the dude zone to the dad zone. The dude zone is when you're hanging out. You have your relationship. You have your job and all these other hobbies and cool things that are priorities for you, and now that you are going to be, you are a dad, but you're going to be a dad when the baby gets here, as these expectant fathers are thinking, but you need to move into that dad zone,” which is shifting some things around, looking at things a little bit differently, re-prioritizing a couple things and during that pregnancy journey, things are really tricky for us guys because we know we are supposed to be helpful and supportive. We don't know what that means and we bump into doing it wrong a lot.We are guessing. We are sort of like, “Well, I don't know.” We are trying to figure it out, and so the two dud zones I talk about are Wimpy Town on the left and Jerkville on the right. Wimpy Town are the guys that just gave up on trying to figure it out and they basically say something to the effect of, “Just tell me what to do and I will do that.” They are defeated. They have given up on trying to figure out because they're just tired. They are just frustrated with guessing wrong but that's not really a good place to be. No expectant mama wants to have to tell her partner what to do, and when to do it, and all of that kind of stuff. That's not a good teammate or good teamwork there.And on the other side is Jerkville. Those are the guys that occasionally will be like, “You know what? I don't know what to do. I'm guessing. You do it. I saw a zebra pop out a baby last night on a nature show and the zebra was running around five minutes later. I don't quite understand what's going on here.” They get a little testy and defiant. That journey to the dad zone, you can bump into those dud zones a lot.There were many times I felt like I had one foot in Wimpy Town and one foot in Jerkville and I was like, “I don't know what to do. I really want to be great and to be an awesome partner, but last night this worked and then tonight, the same thing is the worst idea ever. I am trying to remain connected but it is just really tricky.” So that's where I am coming from. A lot of what I am trying to offer here is specific tips to help these guys make that journey from the dude zone to the dad zone with fewer slips into those dud zones. So that's another reason I would say, give it a shot out there.Julie: Love it.Meagan: That's awesome.Julie: That's great. Yeah. I am going to add in a little question before Meagan asks the last one and we wrap it up. What about the dads who are less assertive? I know for some dads, it's harder for them to stand up for their partner in the birth room. It's harder for them to tell the doctor that they want to do something different even if they agree that they should do something different. Everybody's personalities are different, but what advice would you give for those dads who are less confrontational but who want to be a solid, strong support for their wife?David: That's a really good question.Meagan: Yeah. Would time still be the suggestion or do you feel like there is a different approach for those guys?David: I think time is always a great first place to start because then you have a chance to marinate a little bit and think about what the question is that is being asked of you or the suggestion. You have a chance to speak it over, talk it over a little bit with you. Ideally again, this gets back to that doula and having a great doula as your wingman. This is a great resource for us guys to discuss some of these things and also to check in with our partner and see how they're feeling. Sometimes, something that is very clear in the birth plan or the birth preferences, as things progress, your partner may change her mind also and you don't want to be adamantly holding the ground against something that your partner has now shifted her opinion on too.So that's where having those conversations-- but it's tricky. I am not an OB. I am not a midwife. I am not an auto mechanic. I am not going to argue against these people too strongly when they are specifically trained to do these things and I am not. So it's really hard because most of us guys who aren't birth professionals don't really feel like we have too strong of a leg to stand on when push comes to shove.Julie: Yeah.David: We want our partners to be safe. We want our babies to be safe and that's what the experts are there for ideally. That's what their focus is too. So I still think time is your best first resource to ask for, and then to just confer with your partner and confer with other people on your birth team. “What would you do if this was your partner? What would you do if this was your baby?” could be some good questions to ask back or “What are some other options?” But at the end of the day, sometimes you have to make a decision and you just have to make the best one you can at the time with what information you have.Julie: Yeah. Totally. Yeah, I guess that was kind of a bad question. It had already been answered, but I think maybe you gave a different perspective from it and we learn by repetition, right? All right, Meagan, you are up. Last question.Meagan: Yeah. So one of the questions is: Are men actually reading your book? And I can almost guarantee that the answer is, “Yes”. But yeah, do you feel like you have had a good turnout from your book?David: Yeah. So far, it's been pretty exciting. The book just came out in the fall of last year and one of the funny things about this is, assuming that they purchased a book somewhat early in the pregnancy, they are just now getting into the actual experience of having labor and delivery, and that fourth trimester. The sales have really been taking off recently which is great, but I have been starting to get some feedback from some of the guys out there and from some of the mamas too. I've gotten a couple thank you emails recently.Meagan: Awesome.David: I have gotten a couple more that said, “I probably should have taken you more seriously earlier in the journey.”Julie: Aw snap.Meagan: That's awesome feedback though. You are like, “Yeah, okay. I am writing something really good here.” Yeah.Julie: You're like, “Heck yeah. I'm so legit.”David: I got one. It was like, “It's 3:00 a.m. I am working at one of your Dad Tips. My baby was crying. They are finally asleep in my arm and I am typing this on my phone with one hand, but thank you so much for this tip. This was great, some of the suggestions. I have looked back at the book also in some of the earlier chapters and I was thinking, ‘Yep. Should have done that. Yep. That would have been better.'”So ultimately, at the end of the day, it's the guys out there who have had a chance to go through the pregnancy journey and now their buddies are going through their own pregnancy journey and their friends are asking them, “Hey, what kind of tips or advice do you have for me?” A couple of guys have said, “My first step is going to be to read this book and I am going to give them my copy.” And I am like, “That's great. Pass it on.” Let the information get out there and make these birth experiences for all parties-- mama, dad, and baby too. Anything any of us can do to make that a little bit smoother and easier is great.So yes. Thankfully, they are reading it out there. Some of the mamas too. I got one email from a mama recently who, she had glanced through the book in preparation whether she should recommend it to her husband or not and she said she learned a lot about how he was looking at the pregnancy that she was able to be more, I don't wanna say compassionate, but--Meagan: Understanding.David: Understanding, yeah. Like, “This is hard for him too. He is not only over there or not connecting with me, but he has got his own journey and a lot of this is new.” You can't hold somebody accountable for something they haven't been trained to do or informed about. So she was able to be a lot more understanding and workable in connecting with him and his journey too which I thought was awesome. I thought, “That was unexpected but great.” Teamwork makes the dream work.Meagan: Seriously though. That's what I'm saying though. So many people are focused on what mom is doing. Mom is carrying baby. Mom is growing. Mom is doing this. Her boobs are getting big. You know, all these things, but it's not like, you know what? Dad is struggling seeing her in pain. Dad is struggling seeing her not sleep very well. Dad is struggling with the fact that soon there's going to be a child to take care of. You know? There is so much. And so I love that, that she was like, “I was able to understand his point of view too.” That is really cool. That is really, really cool.David: Yeah, that was neat. I really liked that one because, at the end of the day, the parenting partnership is what's really going to be coming into play here, and whatever we can do to strengthen those bonds coming from both the mom's side and the dad‘s side, that just makes that family unit so much stronger to work with those fourth trimester challenges, of which there can be many.Julie: Yeah.Meagan: Yes.David: So build those bonds now.Meagan: Well, and I just want to touch back on what you said, there is so much in your book that talks about things before baby even comes. And so Father's Day is in June? When does this air?Julie: This is airing on June 2. When is Father's Day?David: Awesome.Meagan: Okay, see? Father's Day is not June 2. It is after. This is a great Father's Day present. So I am just going to quickly go over a couple of the chapter titles. “The Dad Instinct” which, in my opinion, is awesome that you are calling it that. It seriously made me so happy when I saw that because we always talk about mama's instinct, mom instinct knows best. Guess what? Dad's instinct knows best too. So “Dad's Instinct”, “We Are Pregnant: Through the First Trimester”, “The Second Trimester: Setting the Table”, “Third Trimester: Giddyup Cowboy”. Oh yeah. That's when all of the complaining happens. “Labor and Delivery: The Time is Now”. “Welcome to Fatherhood: The Fourth Trimester”.And then he's got tips and gift tracker spreadsheets, oh my gosh, go-bag essentials, birth plan topics, big ideas. I mean, there is so much in this amazing book. So ladies, grab this book for your husband. Read it together. Read it together.Julie: thevbaclink.com/wtfMeagan: WTF, yes.Julie: Alive and active. I just tested it on my browser. It is on Amazon, both paperback and audio versions.Meagan: Which is awesome. Are you the person reading it?David: The Kindle is available, but the audio version is not yet available.Julie: Oh sorry. I saw Kindle. Yeah.David: That's okay.Julie: No, sorry.David: Yeah, Kindle is there. I did do the audio and I am waiting for that to get a little bit more polished up with some of my coughing and whatnot taken out, but that will be available soon too. So we are almost there.Julie: We can relate.Meagan: Awesome.Julie: Yay.Meagan: Okay ladies, Father's Day is coming up. Definitely go grab this.Julie: Perfect. All right. Was there anything else you wanted to add before we cut you loose?David: No, this was great. I really enjoyed coming on here chatting with you ladies. Everything around birth is something I am super passionate about and like I said, anything out there that is helping people have a little bit easier, smoother journey is fantastic. So thanks again for having me on. I really appreciate it.Meagan: Thank you for joining us.Julie: Yeah, absolutely. It was fun having you on. All right, ladies, we are going to drop the link to his book in our bio, so go ahead and click on it there.Meagan: Do you have social media, David?David: I have a Facebook page that is pretty not active. I have been getting a lot of requests to get on Instagram and do some fun live videos, but I am a little bit behind the curve on that. So hopefully I can get that soon. But the website has tons of great resources on there. It's just www.welcometofatherhood.com.Julie: Perfect.David: Like you mentioned, the birth plan, the gift tracker spreadsheet, and all kinds of cool stuff. So you can always reach me through there too and send me emails. I love emails. I love questions and comments so please send them on in.Meagan: Awesome.Julie: Perfect.ClosingWould you like to be a guest on the podcast? Head over to thevbaclink.com/share and submit your story. For all things VBAC, including online and in-person VBAC classes, The VBAC Link blog, and Julie and Meagan's bios, head over to thevbaclink.com. Congratulations on starting your journey of learning and discovery with The VBAC Link.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Ask the Doulas
Welcome to Fatherhood

Ask the Doulas

Play Episode Listen Later May 20, 2021 55:04


Kristin talks with David Arrell, author of Welcome to Fatherhood. He talks about why he wrote the book then gets into some great tips for Dads and how to best support Mom! This one is a must listen!

The Empowered Birth Podcast
Ep 46//WTF-Welcome to Fatherhood with David Arrell

The Empowered Birth Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2020 34:33


I'm thrilled to share this episode with you today, mostly because it's not one that is normal in the sense that I'm interviewing a man on the show! I got to speak with author of the book Welcome to Fatherhood David Arrell.    David Arrell is an Author, Entrepreneur, Consultant, and Men's Coach currently living in Colorado Springs, CO. He is passionate about coaching men on how to more fully embrace and embody healthier modes of masculinity, especially through the powerful modalities of partnership and parenting. His most recent work in this area is the book Welcome To Fatherhood: The Modern Man's Guide to Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Fatherhood, better known as WTF.   David and I had an engaging conversation and I promise this is on you're going to want to pass onto your man to help him feel confident in his support role through pregnancy, labor and postpartum!   Connect with David: www.welcometofatherhood.com Email: david@welcometofatherhood.com   Connect with Aly:  IG: @empoweredbirthpodcast FB Private Group: facebook.com/groups/empoweredmamastribe   Join our private membership group at Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/empoweredbirthpodcast