You Can Mentor

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zach Garza talks with Susie Gallo of Sonoma Valley Mentoring Alliance about the life-changing impact of mentorship. They explore the value of compassion, curiosity, and authentic connections with mentees. Susie offers practical advice on supporting mentors, creative approaches to recruitment, and the importance of patience in building meaningful relationships. The episode emphasizes how small, everyday experiences can shape young lives and calls for greater community involvement in mentoring efforts.https://sonomamentoring.org/--Takeaways:Mentoring is about building authentic relationships.Compassion should come before comprehension in mentoring.Curiosity helps mentors understand their mentees better.Simple experiences can create lasting memories for kids.Setting mentors up for success is crucial for effective mentoring.Community engagement is essential for recruiting mentors.Patience is key in the mentoring journey.Kids often face challenges that mentors may not see.Mentors should be aware of their mentee's family dynamics.Creating a supportive environment is vital for mentoring success.--Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Mentoring and Connection07:12 The Importance of Compassion in Mentoring15:42 Building Authentic Relationships in Mentoring23:40 Setting Up Mentors for Success30:11 Innovative Approaches to Mentor Recruitment37:33 The Journey of Mentoring: Patience and Growth--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review." On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show." Thank you!Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza interviews Randy Odom, President of Kids Across America (KAA), to explore the powerful impact of mentorship and the unique opportunities KAA provides for youth. Randy reflects on his own mentorship journey and discusses how camp experiences play a vital role in shaping young lives. The conversation highlights the Kaleo program, which develops young leaders, and offers insight into daily life at KAA—where the focus is on building strong relationships in a safe and supportive environment. The episode wraps up with a call for listeners to get involved and support KAA's mission.https://kaakamps.org/--Takeaways:KAA provides a safe and nurturing environment for kids.Mentorship is crucial for youth development and overcoming challenges.The camp experience can lead to significant personal transformation.Building trust is essential in mentorship relationships.The Kaleo program empowers youth leaders to support their communities.Effective training for counselors is vital for impactful mentorship.Real-life stories illustrate the power of mentorship.Daily activities at KAA are designed to foster relationships and personal growth.The camp emphasizes Christian values and community support.Investing in youth workers is key to sustaining mentorship efforts.--Chapters: 00:00  Introduction to Kids Across America02:11  Randy Odom's Journey and Mentorship05:04  The Impact of Camp Experiences08:31  The Need for Mentorship in Today's Youth11:06  The Role of Mentorship in Overcoming Challenges13:31  Training Counselors for Effective Mentorship19:05  Real-Life Stories of Transformation20:19  The Kaleo Program and Its Importance25:47  The Camp Experience: Daily Life at KAA35:38  Conclusion and Call to Action--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza speaks with Reverend Clarence Ford III, Program Director of the Crossroads Mentoring Program in Houston, Texas. They explore how mentoring serves as a form of discipleship and plays a critical role in youth development. Clarence highlights the power of building relationships within schools to bring hope to young people, and he emphasizes the importance of community partnerships and proper mentor training. Framing mentoring as a meaningful ministry, the conversation calls on listeners to take part in the collective effort to support youth and families through mentorship and service.https://crossroadsmentoring.org/--Takeaways:Mentoring is a form of discipleship.Building relationships is key to instilling hope.Hope can be restored by helping kids dream again.Partnerships enhance the effectiveness of mentoring programs.Meeting basic needs is crucial before mentoring can take place.Training is essential for mentors to be effective.Unity in diversity is important in community work.Mentoring can change the trajectory of a young person's life.Everyone has a role to play in mentoring and community service.Use your gifts to serve and build the kingdom.--Chapters:00:00 Introduction to Mentoring and Discipleship03:00 The Role of Mentoring in Youth Development05:58 Building Relationships in Schools08:56 Instilling Hope in Youth12:01 The Importance of Partnerships14:58 Training Mentors for Impact18:07 The Call to Mentoring20:59 Conclusion and Encouragement--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza interviews Michael Morgan, founder of A Few Good Mentors, Inc. Michael shares his journey from being an FBI surveillance expert to becoming a dedicated youth mentor. The conversation explores the importance of mentoring, the challenges of recruiting male mentors, and the core values that guide their organization. Michael emphasizes the need for male role models in the community, the impact of mentoring on young lives, and the significance of faith in overcoming challenges. The episode concludes with insights on how to engage and retain mentors while addressing the evolving needs of today's youth.https://afgmentoring.net/--Takeaways:Mentoring is about caring for the next generation.There is a significant need for male mentors in communities.Succession planning is a crucial aspect of mentoring.Recruiting male mentors is a challenging but necessary task.Core values like SHIELDS guide mentoring efforts.Engaging mentors requires personal connection and support.Today's youth face unique challenges, including mental health issues.Education needs to be made fun to engage students.The impact of mentoring can be seen years later.Faith plays a vital role in the mentoring journey.--Chapters:00:00 Introduction to Mentoring and Michael's Background02:52 Transition from FBI to Mentoring Youth06:07 The Importance of Mentoring and Succession Planning09:00 Challenges in Recruiting Male Mentors12:01 Core Values: SHIELDS and Their Significance15:01 Engaging and Retaining Mentors18:08 Addressing the Needs of Today's Youth20:48 The Impact of Mentoring on Young Lives24:01 Overcoming Discouragement in Mentoring27:06 Final Thoughts and Resources for Mentors--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode, Zach shares an exciting update for the You Can Mentor podcast! The show, which started four years ago with co-founder Stephen Murray, has been dedicated to helping faith-based mentoring organizations collaborate, grow, and equip themselves with best practices. Over time, they've created 264 podcast episodes, a series of books, and hosted the National Christian Mentoring Gathering.Looking ahead, the podcast is shifting gears with a new focus on quality over quantity. Zach explains that, while the podcast will still feature some familiar voices, the goal is to bring in the most valuable guests—experts in the mentoring field—who can provide listeners with practical tools and insights.This season will also see a new episode schedule: bi-weekly episodes focusing on expert guests who can share mentoring tools to help organizations thrive. Zach also acknowledges that they've interviewed many of their contacts over the past few years, so re-interviews might be coming soon to catch up on what's new with past guests.The podcast will continue to provide resources like consulting, coaching, and downloads to support faith-based mentoring ministries. Zach encourages listeners to reach out with any questions, guest suggestions, or ideas for future episodes.As always, the You Can Mentor team is committed to equipping and encouraging listeners to serve kids from hard places and their families. Zach wraps up by expressing love and support for all the listeners in their mentoring journey.www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza interviews AD, the Men's Mentorship Manager at GRIP Outreach for Youth in Chicago. AD discusses his faith journey, his background in mentorship, and the mission of GRIP, which focuses on building meaningful, life-on-life relationships with youth. The conversation highlights GRIP's programs, such as SLAM, a sports-based mentorship initiative, and the Future Steps program, which helps prepare students for life after high school. AD underscores the importance of equipping mentors, connecting them with students, and fostering growth in both groups, concluding with inspiring stories of transformation and the role of prayer in mentorship.--Takeaways: AD's journey from San Antonio to Chicago highlights the unexpected paths God can take us on.Mentorship is about building relationships and being present in students' lives.SLAM combines sports and mentorship to create a fun and engaging environment for youth.The Future Steps program helps students prepare for life after high school through practical skills and career guidance.Equipping mentors is essential for effective mentorship and building trust with students.Understanding the gap between expectations and reality can help mentors avoid discouragement.Prayer is a vital component in seeking mentors and guidance in mentorship programs.Growth in mentorship is a two-way street; both mentors and mentees learn from each other.Community partnerships enhance the effectiveness of mentorship programs.Stories of transformation remind us of the impact mentorship can have on young lives.--Chapters:00:00 Introduction to AD and GRIP Outreach06:45 AD's Journey and Background13:23 Understanding GRIP's Mission and Programs19:30 SLAM: Sports and Mentorship22:05 Future Steps Program: Preparing for Life After High School25:35 Equipping Mentors for Success31:18 Connecting Students and Mentors35:31 Growing and Developing Relationships36:18 Stories of Transformation and Encouragement--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza sits down with John Barnard to dive into their new book, The Youth Mentoring Playbook, a must-read for anyone looking to make a difference in the lives of young people. They share key insights, practical strategies, and real-life experiences that help mentors build strong, meaningful relationships. Whether you're a coach, teacher, or community leader, this book will give you the tools to guide and inspire the next generation. Tune in for valuable takeaways and a behind-the-scenes look at their journey in writing the book!Purchase your copy of The Youth Mentoring Playbook here! --It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza and Grant Skeldon dive into the significance of mentorship and discipleship, especially for young people who have faced tough challenges. They share personal stories, insights on starting a new church in Nashville, and the essential role of community in building meaningful connections. The conversation highlights the importance of creating lasting memories in mentorship and overcoming common obstacles that hinder individuals from engaging in these relationships. Zachary and Grant discuss the challenges and rewards of discipleship, touching on barriers like time constraints and feelings of inadequacy. They stress the power of sharing personal testimonies and stories as key mentoring tools. The conversation also explores the stages of discipleship, from being a learner to becoming a multiplier, while underscoring the value of hospitality and warmth in relationship-building. Ultimately, they reflect on the hard work of discipleship and its rewarding potential to make a lasting impact.--Takeaways: Mentorship can significantly impact young people's lives.Creating a safe environment is crucial for trust in mentorship.Community is essential for effective discipleship.People are more open to the gospel during transitions.Connection is more important than content for the next generation.Core memories enhance the mentoring experience.It's important to connect mentees with caring adults.Showing up consistently builds strong relationships.Overcoming feelings of inadequacy is key to mentoring.Discipleship should focus on building relationships, not just teaching. Many people feel they don't have time for discipleship.Feeling unqualified is a common barrier to mentoring.Discipleship can happen in everyday life, not just formal settings.Your testimony can be a powerful tool for discipleship.Sharing failures can create deeper connections than sharing successes.Hospitality is key in building relationships with the next generation.Discipleship involves multiple stages: learner, leader, disciple maker, multiplier.It's important to invest in others, not just for their sake but for the sake of future generations.Discipleship is hard work, but it is worth the effort.Building relationships at the table can lead to transformative experiences.-- Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Personal Updates02:00 The Impact of Mentorship and Discipleship04:33 Mentoring Kids from Difficult Backgrounds07:01 Starting a New Church: Way Church in Nashville11:53 The Importance of Community in Discipleship17:14 Creating Core Memories in Mentorship23:00 Overcoming Roadblocks in Mentorship24:20 Overcoming Barriers to Discipleship41:09 The Stages of Discipleship46:37 The Hard Work of Discipleship--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza and Brad Griffin of Fuller Youth Institute explore the impact of mentoring teenagers, with a focus on identity, belonging, and purpose. Brad, drawing from his research at the Fuller Youth Institute, stresses the importance of genuine connections with young people and fostering safe environments where they can express their thoughts and emotions. The discussion underscores the value of trust, active listening, and guiding teens toward purpose through meaningful service and community engagement.You can checkout Brad's book, Three Big Questions here. To get free resources or find out more information about Fuller Youth Institute, visit https://fulleryouthinstitute.com/.--Takeaways:Mentoring is about listening to teenagers' questions.Identity, belonging, and purpose are crucial for youth.Building trust is essential in mentoring relationships.Creating a safe space allows teens to be authentic.Helping others gives teenagers a sense of purpose.Mentors should not have an agenda when engaging with youth.Follow-up conversations show care and build trust.Teens often feel pressure from expectations around them.Community and church can provide a sense of belonging.God's will for our lives is broad and forgiving.--Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Mentoring and Identity07:32 Exploring Identity, Belonging, and Purpose15:32 Building Trust and Authentic Relationships23:20 Creating Safe Spaces for Teens33:20 Understanding Purpose and Community--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of You Can Mentor, Zachary Garza speaks with Dominick Sanchez from Urban Story Ministries about the power of mentorship in urban communities. Dominick shares his journey from troubled youth to mentor, emphasizing the importance of understanding at-risk youth and addressing misconceptions about their behavior. He highlights the need for trained, compassionate mentors, home visits to grasp mentees' backgrounds, and consistency in building trust. The conversation also explores conflict resolution, setting expectations, and helping youth redefine their identity. Urban Story's mission focuses on equipping local churches to support and guide young people effectively. https://www.urbanstoryministries.com/--Takeaways:Dominic's journey into mentorship began after a life-changing experience at 15.Urban Story aims to empower local churches to effectively mentor youth.Misconceptions about behavior and salvation can hinder effective mentorship.Effective mentors must be called to urban ministry and receive proper training.Home visits are crucial for understanding the backgrounds of mentees.Compassion and understanding are key to building trust with at-risk youth.Mentorship involves consistently showing up and being present in a child's life.Setting clear expectations helps manage group dynamics and behavior.Conflict resolution requires separating the child from their audience.Mentors should focus on resetting the identity of the youth they work with.--Chapters:00:00  Introduction and Background02:47  Dominic's Journey into Mentorship04:08  Understanding Urban Story and Its Mission06:09  Misconceptions in Urban Youth Mentorship08:06  Qualities of Effective Mentors10:45  Tools for Mentoring at-Risk Youth14:38  Dominic's Personal Story and Passion18:34  Advice to Young Dominic22:27  The Role of Mentors in Conflict Resolution24:27  Managing Group Dynamics and Behavior32:20  The Importance of Compassion in Mentorship--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of You Can Mentor, Zachary Garza speaks with Alyssa Bryant from Save Our Youth, a mentoring organization in Denver, Colorado. Alyssa shares her journey from the music industry to her role as Marketing and Events Coordinator. They discuss the organization's mission to instill God-given worth in young people, the impact of mentoring, and the various programs supporting youth aged 10 to 17. She highlights the importance of creating fun experiences for mentees, the rigorous mentor recruitment process, and the long-term value of mentorship. The episode ends with a call to action for potential mentors to get involved.https://www.saveouryouth.org/mentor/--Takeaways:Alyssa transitioned from the music industry to mentoring.Save Our Youth has a waitlist of over 90 kids.The organization focuses on instilling God-given worth in youth.Mentoring relationships average 52 months in duration.Events are designed to create memorable experiences for youth.The recruitment process for mentors includes background checks and interviews.Mentors are supported by mentoring specialists throughout their journey.The organization provides scholarships and resources for youth transitioning to adulthood.Fun experiences are prioritized to build strong mentor-mentee bonds.Save Our Youth encourages community involvement and volunteerism.--Chapters:00:00 Introduction to Save Our Youth06:25 Alyssa's Journey to Save Our Youth12:10 The Impact of Mentoring on Youth18:01 The Mentor Recruitment Process24:54 Creating Lasting Mentor-Mentee Relationships28:12 Supporting Youth Beyond 1831:24 Call to Action for Potential Mentors--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of You Can Mentor, host Zach talks with Kent Evans, founder of Manhood Journey, about the role of mentorship in fatherhood. Kent shares how a mentor shaped his teenage years and emphasizes the power of asking questions over giving answers. They explore the dangers of mentoring, the importance of humility, and how mentors should guide mentees in building decision-making skills. The goal is to transition from mentor to friend, creating a space where both mentor and mentee learn from each other.https://manhoodjourney.org/--Takeaways: Mentorship can profoundly impact personal development.Finding mentors who embody the qualities you aspire to is crucial.Asking questions is more effective than providing answers in mentorship.The best mentors learn from their failures and experiences.Mentors should aim to help protégés solve higher-order problems.Life experiences shape our understanding of mentorship.Building relationships with protégés can lead to lifelong friendships.Effective mentorship involves guiding others to think for themselves.Biblical principles can provide a foundation for fatherhood and mentorship.Mentorship is a continuous learning process for both mentors and protégés. Mentors should focus on asking questions instead of providing answers.It's crucial to help mentees build their own decision-making frameworks.Avoid the mentality that your way is the only way to succeed.Recognize that every individual has unique experiences and insights to share.Ego can hinder effective mentoring; humility is key.Mentoring is about guiding, not dictating paths.Encourage mentees to consider the impact of their decisions on relationships and community.Learning can happen in both directions in a mentoring relationship.Every person you meet has something to teach you.Mentors should model the behavior they wish to see in their mentees.--Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Background03:11 The Importance of Mentorship09:41 The Dangers of Mentoring12:41 Being the Answer Man19:56 Upgrading Problems in Mentorship20:15 The Role of Questions in Mentoring24:25 Building Decision-Making Frameworks26:40 Avoiding the 'My Way' Mentality34:49 The Importance of Trading Seats in Mentoring--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zach Garza interviews Mike McGarry, a seasoned youth pastor and theologian, about the critical role of mentoring in youth ministry. They delve into the importance of presence in mentoring relationships, discipleship, and how to assess a mentee's spiritual relationship with God. Mike highlights the significance of identity in Christ, emphasizing the need for youth to understand their role as image bearers of God. The conversation also explores the challenges and strategies of mentoring youth in a spiritual context, touching on the awkwardness often felt in initiating conversations about faith, selecting the right biblical texts, and practical tips for overcoming barriers to spiritual discussions.Throughout their dialogue, Zach and Mike stress that mentoring requires intentionality, authenticity, and vulnerability, especially when it comes to building relationships that foster spiritual growth. They discuss how mentors can guide young people, particularly those without reliable adult figures in their lives, by providing meaningful affirmation, support, and insights into Christian doctrine. The conversation highlights that spiritual vitality is essential for a healthy faith and that every youth should have a mentor to help them navigate their relationship with God.--Takeaways:The ministry of presence is foundational in youth mentoring.Building relationships is key to effective youth ministry.Discipleship is a slow process requiring intentionality.Understanding Christian doctrine is essential for youth.Spiritual vitality is crucial for a healthy faith.Mentors should assess their mentees' spiritual relationships.Identity in Christ is central to mentoring.Prayer should be the first step in mentoring.Authenticity and vulnerability strengthen mentoring relationships.Every youth should have a mentor guiding them in faith.Mentors should highlight positive traits in mentees that reflect Christ.Opening the Bible can help ease awkward conversations about faith.It's important to meet with mentees with the expectation of discussing faith.Awkwardness in spiritual conversations is common but can be overcome.Asking about prayer requests can lead to deeper discussions.Choosing engaging biblical texts is crucial for effective mentoring.Insecurities can hinder mentorship; submit them to God.Mentors should avoid comparing themselves to other adults in mentees' lives.Meaningful affirmation is more impactful than empty flattery.Mentors play a vital role in guiding youth towards a relationship with God.--Chapters00:00 Introduction to Youth Ministry and Mentoring09:48 Understanding Discipleship and Spiritual Growth21:58 Identity and Being Created in God's Image28:38 Navigating Mentorship Awkwardness36:16 Choosing the Right Biblical Texts45:41 The Unique Role of a Mentor--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of You Can Mentor, Zachary Garza and Norris Williams of Identity Exchange (www.identityexchange.com) explore the vital connection between identity and mentorship. Norris shares his personal journey, emphasizing how understanding our identity in Christ shapes everything we do and how societal labels can distort our self-worth. The conversation dives into the crucial role mentors play in helping youth discover their true identity beyond external achievements, highlighting the importance of hearing God's voice to guide that process. With a focus on transformation and empowerment, they discuss how mentors can facilitate connections with God, leading to a stronger sense of identity rooted in His perspective, not societal standards. Tune in for a thought-provoking conversation on how mentorship can truly change lives!--TakeawaysIdentity is not tied to what we do, but who we are.Curses and praises can distort our true identity.Hearing God's voice is essential for understanding our identity.Mentors play a crucial role in helping youth discover their worth.Self-image should be rooted in God's perspective, not societal standards.Facilitating conversations with God can transform lives.Every individual has the authority to hear God's voice.The importance of blessing others to counteract negative messages.Empowerment comes from knowing one's true identity in Christ.Mentorship is about guiding others to hear from God themselves.--Chapters00:00 Introduction to Identity and Mentorship08:19 The Importance of Identity in Mentoring15:01 Jesus' Identity and Its Relevance25:54 Facilitating Conversations with God37:54 Empowering Mentees to Hear God's Voice43:06 Conclusion: The Power of Blessing and Identity--It would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor Podcast, Zachary Garza interviews John Shearer, leader of Academy 4, a nonprofit mentoring over 4,200 fourth graders annually by partnering with local churches to build sustainable relationships with schools and families. John shares how his cancer journey led him to nonprofit work and highlights Academy Four's programs, which equip children with leadership skills and foster community engagement. With a focus on love, service, and long-term commitment, the episode explores how mentoring transforms both children and volunteers, demonstrating the power of intentional relationships to create lasting change. https://academy4.org/--Key PointsAcademy Four's programs include Spark Clubs and mentoring sessions.The mentoring program helps children develop leadership skills.Parents play a crucial role in their children's education and development.Academy Four aims to equip parents through community programs.The organization has a waiting list of schools wanting to join.John believes in the power of community involvement for positive change. Sustainability is key for community partnerships.Long-term commitment leads to deeper impact.Mentoring is about building relationships, not just numbers.Volunteers often receive more than they give.Love and service can transform communities.Every child deserves to feel known and cared for.Effective mentoring requires intentionality and structure.Community engagement can break down barriers.Relationships are reciprocal; both mentors and mentees benefit.The mission is to love and serve, not to fix.--Chapters00:00 Introduction to Academy Four and John Shearer05:07 John's Journey to Academy Four09:56 The Mission and Programs of Academy Four15:07 Building Relationships with Churches and Schools24:55 Building Sustainable Community Partnerships29:54 Long-Term Commitment to Schools35:57 The Power of Love and Service41:48 Transformative Relationships in Mentoring47:52 Community Impact Through Mentoring--it would mean the WORLD to us if you would leave a 5 star rating on our pod so we can reach more people! Scroll down to the bottom the You Can Mentor page on Apple Podcasts and click "Write Review". On Spotify, go to our page, click the three dots next to the admin wheel, and hit "Rate Show". Thank you!Check out our website for more info. www.youcanmentor.com Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza sits down with Noah McGuffey, Mentor Coordinator at Forerunner Mentoring in Dallas, Texas. Together, they dive deep into Noah's inspiring journey—from his childhood experiences abroad to how those formative years ignited his passion for mentoring. Noah opens up about the powerful mission of Forerunner Mentoring, shedding light on the real challenges of recruiting mentors and the vital role of fostering strong relationships with both mentors and mentees. Whether you're an experienced mentor or just starting out, Noah offers valuable insights on how to attract the right people, onboard them effectively, and show genuine gratitude for their commitment. Don't miss out on these actionable strategies that can take your mentoring efforts to the next level. -- TakeawaysNoah's upbringing overseas influenced his passion for mentoring.Forerunner Mentoring aims to fulfill the potential of young boys without father figures.Building relationships is key to successful mentoring.Recruiting the right mentors is a continuous challenge.Church partnerships are vital for mentor recruitment.Mentors need to feel supported and valued to remain engaged.The onboarding process is crucial for mentor confidence and safety.Expressing gratitude to mentors enhances their experience.Transformative stories often emerge from mentoring relationships.Creating a culture of appreciation is essential for retention.Chapters00:00 Introduction and Background03:03 Growing Up Overseas and Its Impact05:46 The Role of Mentoring in Noah's Life09:02 Forerunner Mentoring: Mission and Challenges12:06 Recruitment Strategies for Mentors14:45 Building Church Partnerships18:02 Creating Positive Experiences for Mentors19:55 Onboarding Process for Mentors26:02 Retaining Mentors and Building Relationships30:00 Stories of Transformation38:59 Expressing Gratitude to Mentors--If you are a mentoring leader, check out the You Can Mentor learning labs. We are a monthly leadership cohort that surrounds you with equipping and encouragement from other mentoring leaders. For an hour each month, we discuss a topic that will help you be a more equipped and encouraged leader. We have two cohorts: one for executives and one for program directors. Check out our website for more info. www.youcanmentor.com Also, check out our National Christian Mentoring Gathering, which is April 16-18, 2025 in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more about all we do at www.youcanmentor.com

In this podcast, John and Zach discuss the "motorcycle metaphor" to highlight important lessons about mentorship through John's experience riding motorcycles with his 18-year-old son. Here are the key takeaways:Communication is Key: Effective communication is vital for mentoring, especially when introducing new experiences to a mentee. This includes preparing them beforehand, offering guidance during the experience, and debriefing afterward. It's crucial to anticipate challenges and communicate clearly about what to expect.Superpower Observation: Mentors should be observant, noticing both verbal and nonverbal cues from their mentees. Just as John had to be extra aware of his son's safety while riding, mentors need to be attuned to their mentee's feelings and behaviors, sensing when something is off and offering support.Modeling Learned Habits: Mentors should be mindful of their actions, as mentees often imitate them. John observed his son mimicking his riding posture, reminding him of the power of modeling positive habits. Mentors should lead by example, as mentees will often do what they see, not just what they hear.Being Intentional: Preparation and intentionality are essential for effective mentorship. This means being intentional in conversations, actions, and even in how mentors approach situations with their mentees. It's about being present, clear, and thoughtful in every interaction.In summary, effective mentoring requires communication, observation, intentionality, and modeling good habits. Mentors should guide, observe, and lead by example while always being prepared to learn from their own mistakes and offering grace when things go wrong.This episode is packed with actionable tips that will take your mentoring to the next level. Whether you're mentoring in your community, at work, or at church, these insights will make a real impact.

In this episode of You Can Mentor, host Zach sits down with Annie and Dennis from Club Christ Ministries in Las Vegas, an organization dedicated to mentoring kids and transforming communities. Annie, the Program Director, and Dennis, the Henderson Center Director, share powerful stories of how their work provides hope and support to kids facing challenges like violence and poverty.Through tutoring, leadership development, and spiritual guidance, Club Christ Ministries is creating a safe space for kids to grow academically, emotionally, and spiritually. You'll hear inspiring accounts of kids discovering their potential, breaking cycles of hardship, and embracing their faith—all thanks to the consistency and love of mentors.This episode is a moving reminder of how one mentor can make a lasting impact, not just on a child's life but on future generations. Don't miss this conversation, and find out how you can be part of the mission to transform lives through mentorship.Listen now, and visit youcanmentor.com for resources and ways to get involved! Give us that 5 star rating and share this episode with your friends. Thanks!

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, host Zachary Garza welcomes Andy Paul, a youth pastor from Salem Baptist Church in Georgia. They discuss the importance of mentoring in youth ministry, sharing personal stories and practical tips for connecting with young people. Andy shares his journey into youth ministry, the significance of radical hospitality, and the unique challenges and opportunities of mentoring in rural communities. The conversation emphasizes the value of showing up for kids, building relationships, and the lasting impact of mentorship.--Chapters00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction10:35 The Role of Mentoring in Youth Ministry16:08 Mentoring in Rural Communities28:16 The Impact of Mentorship on Youth

In this episode, Zachary Garza sits down with Maggie Middleton, a passionate advocate for youth mentoring, to explore the life-changing power of guiding the next generation. Together, they dive into Maggie's personal journey in mentoring and discuss the transformative concept of Positive Youth Development (PYD), which focuses on building strengths rather than highlighting challenges.Maggie shares her belief that every young person is a "child of promise" and that mentors have the unique ability to see and nurture that potential. With a deep connection to faith and the inherent worth of every individual, Maggie and Zachary explore how mentoring can shape young lives, creating pathways for growth, resilience, and success.They also unpack key concepts that can empower mentors to make a lasting impact, including the Big Three in youth development, the Five C's of positive growth, and the 40 developmental assets that contribute to a young person's thriving future.If you're a mentor, educator, or someone passionate about empowering youth, this conversation will remind you of the importance of focusing on the positive, fostering meaningful relationships, and encouraging young people to dream big. Join us for a conversation about grace, strength, and the extraordinary potential of our youth.--Maggie Middleton has worked for Amachi Lexington (an initiative of the Lexington Leadership Foundation), a one-on-one community-based mentoring program serving youth impacted by parental incarceration since 2010, where she is currently the program director. She also serves as a regional coach for the Leadership Foundations youth mentoring network, where she gets to encourage and serve several mentoring programs nationwide. She loves to advocate for the power of youth mentoring in communities and is passionate about connecting positive adults with the incredible young people in her program. In addition to directing Amachi, she has served as an Amachi mentor for several young women. Maggie has an M.A. In Christian Ministries from Asbury Theological Seminary and is working on her M.S. in Youth Development Leadership from Clemson University. In her tiny bit of spare time, she loves to travel, read, kayak, and participate in 5k's.--00:00: Introduction to Mentoring and Maggie's Journey09:12: Understanding Positive Youth Development (PYD)14:49: Empowering Young People Through Mentoring24:21: The Connection Between PYD and Faith28:06: The Power of Grace in Mentoring30:24: Conversations Shape Growth32:17: The Importance of Positive Messaging34:27: The Big Three in Youth Development42:18: Understanding the Five C's48:11: Exploring the 40 Assets for Youth

In this episode of the You Can Mentor podcast, Zachary Garza sits down with Dr. John Trent to explore the life-changing impact of mentorship and the power of words. Dr. Trent opens up about his own journey, overcoming a difficult childhood, and the crucial role mentorship played in his healing. He highlights the importance of having someone who truly believes in you and introduces the concept of "the blessing"—a biblical idea centered around affirming and adding value to others' lives.Together, Zachary and Dr. Trent dive into the five key elements of blessing, including the healing power of meaningful touch, and how these elements can transform relationships. They discuss how mentorship can guide individuals through their struggles, help them recognize their worth, and inspire hope for the future. Through a powerful conversation about encouragement, faith, and the deep connections that mentors can foster, they reveal how words, touch, and genuine commitment are essential in guiding others toward growth and healing.Download the Shareable Resource at https://www.youcanmentor.com/downloads.-- Dr. John Trent is an award-winning, best-selling author and the president of StrongFamilies.com and the Center for StrongFamilies, both organizations dedicated to strengthening marriage and family relationships worldwide. He is known for books such as The Blessing, Breaking the Cycle of Divorce, Heartshift, and Leading from Your Strengths. Dr. Trent is also the creator of the Lion, Otter, Golden Retriever, and Beaver personality framework. He holds a Master of Theology degree from Dallas Theological Seminary and a Ph.D. in Marriage and Family Counseling from North Central Texas Federation of Colleges and Universities. For over 40 years, Dr. Trent and his wife, Cindy, have been married and have two daughters, Kari and Laura. 00:00 Introduction to Mentorship and the Power of Words02:01 John Trent's Personal Journey and the Importance of Relationships06:42 The Role of Mentorship in Healing and Growth11:42 Understanding the Concept of the Blessing16:52 The Five Elements of Blessing and Meaningful Touch23:24 The Power of Touch and Connection24:26 The Importance of Spoken Words28:10 Overcoming Lies and Seeking Encouragement32:26 Attaching High Value Through Words34:42 Envisioning a Special Future36:19 Genuine Commitment in Mentorship42:49 Pointing to Jesus in Mentorship

The Gate Youth Association is a 501(c)(3), non-profit corporation whose mission is to demonstrate Christ's love to the youth of our community through academic, social, recreational, and spiritual activities. Currently, The Gate is open 5 days a week and serves 400 teens each week through various programs. Their vision is a community where future generations experience, follow, and serve Christ. Considering that Tuesday Church Lunch has been in existence for 30 years and our afterschool programming has been in place for 19 years, The Gate is currently seeing their vision come alive. They see past Gate students already reaching various stages of adulthood from high school graduate to midlife and many are living proof of our mission statement. The Gate sees our past students serving as influential men and women of faith and goodwill in our community, our nation and our world. They are now helping others around them be known, encouraged and encounter Christ's unconditional love.Learn more at https://www.thegateyouth.org/ or @thegateyouthassoc--You Can Mentor. We help Christian Mentoring Leaders thrive. • Come to our National Christian Mentoring Gathering. • Join our monthly Learning Lab Leadership Cohorts • Check out our books and shareable resources.  • Be a part of our Christian mentoring network. • Find ways to get better through our coaching and consulting.Find all at youcanmentor.com or follow us @youcanmentor on Instagram. If you'd like to help, please give us a 5 star rating wherever you listen to our podcast.

All mentoring organizations always need more of two things:Mentors and Money.November 15th officially starts the End of Year Giving season, so tune into our podcast to learn how to maximize your fundraising during the final days of 2024. Maintaining consistent communication with donors during this season is vital to ensuring their continued support with such critical funding at stake. Effective donor engagement can mean the difference between meeting or falling short of fundraising goals, which in turn can influence an organization's ability to execute their mission. We talk about this, and so much more, on this episode of You Can Mentor.--Find all fundraising wisdom at www.nextafter.com.A curious mind, a competitive drive, and an empathetic fundraiser, Courtney Krus leads client success at NextAfter. In this role, Courtney drives the strategy, testing, and optimization within organization's fundraising programs; ultimately helping nonprofits grow more names, donors, and dollars for their cause.Prior to serving as Executive Vice President with NextAfter, she led the digital marketing and fundraising for a broadcast, publishing, and education nonprofit. She has developed and directed multiple innovative, multi-channel fundraising and content marketing campaigns and led enterprise content strategies within the for-profit and nonprofit space.Her extensive experience fuels her desire to help organizations embrace a culture of optimization and testing, and champion a donor-centric, data-driven philosophy. Courtney is also a board member for a local nonprofit and a momma to two boys.--You Can Mentor. We help Christian Mentoring Leaders thrive.Come to our National Christian Mentoring Gathering.Join our monthly Learning Lab Leadership CohortsCheck out our books and shareable resources. Be a part of our Christian mentoring network.Find ways to get better through our coaching and consulting.Find all at youcanmentor.com or follow us @youcanmentor on Instagram

If you or someone you know grew up without a father, I'd like for you to check out my new book, Tell Me About Your Father. It is an auto-biographical journey that describes how I dealt with my fatherlessness. I pray it is a tool for mentors who have fatherless mentees, for mentors who may have grown up without a positive relationship with their father, or for anyone who has a loved one who has a fatherless past.-- What goes through your mind when I ask you about your father? Perhaps a smile pops up on your face because you had the best dad in the world. But what if you have the opposite reaction and are met with anger, sadness, or even apathy because your relationship with your father has hurt you in some way? If that's you, I know how you feel. So, tell me about your father. Let's figure out how you got to where you are today by tackling topics such as generational sin and how your wounds are impacting you as an adult. Together, let's go on a journey to identify the hurts from your father and how to process and heal those pains so you, and everyone who comes after you, can be set free. Free to choose faith over fear, security over insecurity, and help you experience the unconditional love of God instead of the performance-based love of people. Using personal testimonies from his own life, Zach Garza will use his story to encourage you to start the journey, give you tips to keep you on the path of healing, and share stories that will let you know that you are not on this journey alone. Your relationship with your father may not be perfect. Your father is definitely not perfect. But the Lord can use those hurts and the power of forgiveness to help you become your best self and to give you the greatest gift he can give you; more of Himself.--Find Zach's new book here and holler at him zach@youcanmentor.com--If you like the pod, share it with a friend and give us a five star rating. Check us on instagram @youcanmentor, follow us on youtube @christianmentoring, and find us at www.youcanmentor.com

Hey mentoring friends, would you please give us that 5 star rating to help us reach more people? It'll take 19 seconds and it really means a lot to us. Thank you!--If you are a mentoring leader, check out the You Can Mentor learning labs. We are a monthly leadership cohort that surrounds you with equipping and encouragement from other mentoring leaders. For an hour each month, we discuss a topic that will help you be a more equipped and encouraged leader. We have two cohorts: one for executives and one for program directors. Check out our website for more info. www.youcanmentor.com --On today's show, we have Al Nodarse from Faithful Friends Portland. Al comes to Faithful Friends as Executive Director after a career spent in business growth and revenue. Raised in Texas to a Spanish-speaking household, he and his wife and son lived in California before moving to the Portland area in 2007.  Al has served on over 10 non-profit boards/committees focused on helping youth and is excited to shift careers from the for-profit to non-profit worlds. He began his mentoring journey as a college student in Texas and hasn't stopped, believing firmly that most of the problems in society could be solved through mentoring. On weekends Al and his family love to check out car meets.Here's some info on Faithful Friends: We cultivate mentor relationships that inspire growth, resilience, and hope.In 1991, Duncan Campbell set out to determine the best way to transform the most vulnerable children's lives. He was determined to find a way to help children that was grounded in solid research, was focused on quantifiable results and considered the return on investment. A two-year research project identified that the best way to create real change is to start working with children early and provide each of them with a long-term, consistent relationships with caring adults. Based on these findings, Duncan founded Friends of the Children in 1993. Duncan wasn't finished! For over 30 years, he has hoped to see the Christian faith community serve vulnerable children through mentoring. In January 2013, Duncan Campbell was introduced to Josh White, the lead pastor of Door of Hope Church in Portland. Duncan shared his vision for the church to be an active participant in serving the needs of vulnerable children in the city. Together with Josh, they formed a vision to birth a faith-based mentoring program out of Door of Hope. This program would become Faithful Friends Mentoring Program.Faithful Friends began in March 2013 and now has 20 church partnerships and over 70 active mentor/mentee matches.https://faithfulfriendspdx.org/

Ok. We got 5 asks. Our heart in all of this is to see you thrive. So here we go...Would you please:- Follow us on social media @youcanmentor to spread the word about Christian mentoring.- Check our books on Amazon.- Share the podcast with your mentoring friends- Give us that 5 star rating to help us out- Come to the National Christian Mentoring Gathering and Join the monthly Learning Labs.Ok. That's a lot. I'm done. :)Back to the show notes.YCM Podcast / Matching EnergyMatching energy is what it sounds like. You match the energy of your mentee. If he is excited, you get excited. If your mentee is down, act accordingly. This is about losing yourself for the sake of your mentee. It is about creating a safe space for them to celebrate, process, or grieve. Here are some tips on matching energy: Notice your mentee. Non verbals. Facial expressions. Read the situation as soon as you come into contact with them. Ask questions, but use discernment on when to stop asking questions. If they don't want to talk, honor that. Sometimes words are not necessary. If they are excited, match that. Celebrate with them. This can be hard as adult, because we have seemed to forget how to celebrate. If down, check in on them. If they are excited, remind them of the good thing they are celebrating often. Pray with them. Can we thank God for this celebration? Can we ask God for comfort? What not to do:It's ok to encourage, but don't make them feel bad for feeling bad. Don't be a wet blanket. We get it. You're tired. You're stressed. Get your eyes off self and on to them. There is so much power in joy, laughter, and celebration. Don't one up. Just don't. Think of the person of Jesus. How did he act when he was at a party? Do you think he laughed? Was full of joy? How did he act towards the sick or down and out?Jesus was full of compassion. He was observant. He was 100% focused on others. Whatever the other person needed, he figured out what they needed and gave it to them. We must see our mentee. Truly see them. We must know them and know when there is more than some underneath the surface going on. We must enter into the meeting with them thinking “How are they? What do they need? How can I serve them?”Son of man came to serve. Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us! Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

Invitation to InviteWe get it. Sometimes it's hard to hang out with your mentee and feel good about it. Maybe you don't have a ton in common. Even if you do have a ton in common, it can be hard to strike up a conversation with a kid. So what do you do to build the relationship?There is a temptation to always do the “cool” thing. Take them to the movies, putt-putt, a professional sports game… We get that. But that's hard to pull off and doing it more than a few times a year will leave you broke. So what do we do?Here's a trick. Invite them into your life. Whatever you are doing, just invite them along. Because our kids want our attention more than they want the “cool thing”.When you:Go to the grocery storeMow the yardWash the carRun errandsThe best mentors invite their mentee into their everyday life. They just do life adn invite their mentee to do it alongside them. That's life on life. No extra effort needed. Just inviteThat's Jesus. Jesus invites. He says “Come…”Invite your mentee to join your life. What's the worst that happens? You get rejected by a kid. You can handle that. Besides, You never know if they will say yes. And you never know what connection will happen if they say yes. Just keep inviting. 

Creating a Foundation of Trust by Building a Safe EnvironmentTrust is the foundation of your mentoring relationship. Above all else, your mentee has to believe that you are good and that you want them to succeed. The author Stephen Covey says “Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”But what if your mentee has experienced hard times? What if there is trauma in their past or they have been betrayed by those who should have been taking care of them? Because of their histories, it is often difficult for these children to trust the loving adults in their lives, which often results in perplexing behaviors.While a variety of mentoring strategies may be successful with some children, children with histories of harm need caregiving that meets their unique needs and addresses the whole child.That is why even some of the most successful parents are confused when what worked with their child does not work with their mentee. Trust must be established between the mentor and the mentee before you can take any steps of progress in your mentoring relationship. And it can take some time. The reality is that some mentees trust their mentor in three weeks while it takes others over a year. But we can't give up. We must continue to show up to build trust. The best way to build trust is to create a safe environment. Get down on their level. Make eye contact with them. Give them space and go at their pace. Smile often. Give appropriate touch.Use words of affirmation often. Undivided attention.Be patient. When your mentee raises their emotions, you stay calm. Listen to them. This works with eight year olds and eighteen year olds. Even if they look like grown adults, we must always remember that they are still children on the inside.This safe environment will create a nurturing relationship built on a foundation of trust. For some of our kids, they are used to adults telling them all that they are doing wrong. Some rarely see an adult smile and take time out of their day to notice them. You get to be the exception. Keep showing up with a smile on their face. Create a safe environment. Be a stable, consistent adult that they can count on. If your mentee lives in a world where chaos and instability is their normal, meet them with peace and stability. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

All Frustration Comes From Unmet ExpectationsThere is a temptation in mentoring to try to get your mentee to emulate all that worked for you. You want your mentee to go to college, get a job, wear a suit, and get married because you went to college, got a job, wore a suit, and got married. But what if your mentee doesn't want to go to college? What if instead of a suit and high-and-tight haircut, he prefers baggy jeans and dreadlocks? Will you be disappointed? A saying that rings true especially when mentoring kids from hard places is, “All frustration comes from unmet expectations.” I know for me, I had unspoken expectations that I placed on my mentee without even knowing it. I expected them to make good grades, to be polite, and to have athletic success. I wanted them to dress a certain way, speak a certain way, and go to church. Don't get me wrong, these are all good things. There is nothing wrong with giving your mentee the option to do as you have done. But your way is one way, it is not the way. We must be careful not to get caught up trying to get them to emulate us instead of Christ. I know for me, when my mentees desires didn't line up with my desires for them, it caused frustration in our relationship. I couldn't understand why they didn't want the things that I wanted for them. It would cause me to judge them unfairly, and it caused a rift in our relationship. Your mentee is different than you. He or she has a different story, different skills, and a different personality than you. Work with your mentee to figure out what God's unique, individual call and plan is for him or her. Focus instead on making disciples of Christ. The first step is letting go of the expectations you have for your mentee. As hard as it may be, don't focus on the end results. Instead, focus on the process of showing up and loving them right where they are. Love them right where they are and accept them just as they are, instead of getting on to them because they are not where you think they should be. When our expectations aren't met, frustration sets in. When negativity enters your relationship, the enemy uses it to wreak havoc on the trust you've built together. It's okay to hope your mentee goes to college or has athletic success, but don't expect it. Expectation is rigid, but hope is flexible. Expectation is assuming something will happen. Hope is wishing or desiring good to happen. Don't bury your mentee with the weight of having to live up to your expectations. We all have dreams for our mentees, and there is nothing wrong with that. But a question to ask your mentee is “What are your dreams?” Once you know what they want, you can focus on making their dreams come true, instead of the dreams that you want for them. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

Earn the Right to Be HeardYou may have heard the saying “a kid doesn't care what you know until they know that you care.” It is one of my favorite sayings because I think it is 100% accurate. I have seen many mentors get rejected when they try to start the mentoring relationship with giving the mentee advice. Simply put, your mentee really doesn't care what you know. Most are not impressed by your job title or college degree. They don't want to hear about your financial planning strategy or how you became successful, at least not right off the bat. We must earn the right to be heard. Early on in my mentoring journey, one of my mentees named Jason wanted nothing to do with me. All I got from him were icy glares, one word answers, and sarcastic put downs. I would come home rejected and thinking that Jason hated me. But it was just a test. You see, while I thought Jason didn't like me, he was really sizing me up to see if he would allow me to be a part of his life. He wasn't being mean; he was protecting himself. Jason didn't open up until he knew that I was the real deal, and that took a lot of work. Here are three ways that you can earn the right to be heard with your mentee.Keep showing up: Perseverance is required in your mentoring journey. Some mentees will warm up to you the second they meet you, but others, especially older mentees, may take some time in opening up. You can win there hearts by continuing to show up time after time with a smile on your face. Know that the fight for their heart is worth it, and the waiting will pay dividends as your relationship progresses. Sarcasm, impatience, or a failure to understand why they won't open up will delay progress. Smiles, asking questions, and putting yourself in their shoes will help open up the door. Seek first to understand: Realize that you are asking your mentee to open up to a total stranger is a tall order. Entering into the relationship with humility is a great way to earn you the right to be heard. You don't know what your mentee has been through. You don't know their past or their story. You probably don't even know their personality or their temperament. Spend the first season of your mentoring relationship seeking to understand who they are and where they come from. Open them up to your life as well as the opportunities arise. Make it your mission to learn as much as you possibly can about your mentee and how they are wired. We must focus on them, instead of on ourselves. Make their life better: Serving your mentee in whatever way necessary is a great way to earn the right to be heard. How can you make their life better? Be on the lookout for creative ways to bless them. Maybe they need a ride somewhere or a connection to get a job? Perhaps its giving them access to a new experience or a place to hang out with their friends? It also could just be as simple as encouraging them and making sure they leave your presence with a laugh and a smile. Serving them in practical and encouraging ways is a great way to earn favor with your mentee. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

With > ForI love youth ministry. I am the product of a healthy youth group from the 80's and 90's that loved me well and gave me the chance to realize my identity and purpose within a group of youth workers and teenagers who were my community during those formative years. I also was blessed by a youth minister named Troy who encouraged me and equipped me to the point that after high school (and some considerable wrestling with the call) I became a youth minister too.Church leadership through associate pastoring, music ministry, and youth ministry was my only full-time occupation before taking on the role of an executive director of a nonprofit seven years ago.As much as I love supporting teenagers and watching them realize their IPC in Christ, there is an element of highly-developed mainstream youth ministry I don't love – and that is the entertainment factor!All too often, there is a high priority in the church to keep our children, teenagers, (and adults) engaged by entertaining them. It can be seen in the games we play, the songs we sing, and even the sermons we preach! Smoke machines, stage lighting, videos, and pastors not dressing age appropriately can be distracting.One particular week, I was working on Wednesday night's bible study after coming up with and making purchases for that night's fun stage game. I had already planned out that evening's meal with one of our volunteers and needed to get started on cleaning the youth room from the previous Sunday night. It dawned on me in that moment that a lot of what we did as youth workers was to create an environment FOR our youth in hopes that they enjoy our time together and invite friends to the carnival! The problem was there were no opportunities for youth to invest their time or efforts into the ministry. In 1 Samuel 15, Saul is commanded by God to wipe out his enemies. But instead of doing so, Saul spares Agag the king and holds back some of the best livestock to make offerings to God later. Samuel reflects God's anger by telling him that obedience is better than sacrifice and that because Saul has rejected God's word, God is rejecting Saul as king. Intense!This passage reminds us that God is serious about obedience. We must remember that what we do WITH God (obedience) is so much more important than anything we can ever do FOR him (sacrifice)! In my youth ministry, we began giving students the opportunity to share in our planning and giving them projects to work on and invest in instead of simply showing up each week to be entertained.Within your mentor/mentee relationship you can start thinking of what you can do WITH your mentee as opposed to what you just do FOR them! (Example: Mow an elderly person's yard with your mentee instead of taking them to a movie.)  --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

Ending a Mentoring Relationship WellWhat do you do whenever major life circumstances pop up that get in the way of your mentoring relationship?Maybe your mentee goes off to college or moves to a new community?Perhaps you get a new job and have to move across town or to another state?What if you started mentoring when you were single, but now have a family with a bunch of little kids running around?Whatever the case may be, the reality is there will probably come a day when your mentoring relationship ends. When this happens, finishing well and providing healthy closure is key in maintaining a positive outlook on the mentoring experience. For me personally, I had a lot of mentors in my life, and anytime one would leave… I would take it personal. This had nothing to do with my mentor, but everything to do with my past.We must remember that our mentees are kids. Some have wounds, significant wounds, that haven't been healed yet. Grace has to abound with our mentees. You may do everything right, and they will still be hurt and mad at you. That's ok. You are strong and mature enough to absorb that. Some of our mentees have been abandoned in the past, either by a family member or by another mentor. Kids who have been left are constantly looking for ways to avoid being hurt. They have a hard time believing the best. They tend to assume the worst, with good reason. Them getting into a relationship in the first place takes a ridiculous amount of courage. That's the thing about relationships, they can be risky. Why? Because you have to give trust. Trust that they will do good by you and not hurt you. That is why leaving can be so hard, but here are 5 things you can do to help leave in the healthiest way possible.Celebrate: We suggest having some sort of event to celebrate your mentoring relationship. Invite everyone who was involved with the mentoring relationship, meaning your family, their family, and any mentoring organization who helped facilitate the relationship. Talk about memories that you created and milestone that the mentee hit. Discuss all the good things that happened in your relationship.Network: If the mentee has a desire to continued to be mentored, perhaps go through your network and see if anyone you know can take your place. You may be in a season where you don't have the margin to mentor, but what about your co-worker, neighbor, or family member. If the mentee and their family agree to the new mentor, you can help create a new match. Bonus points if the mentee already knows the new mentor and you can facilitate the exchange in person. Promises: Be careful about making promises that you are not sure you can can keep. We all know that we have the best of intentions, but we do not want to disappoint our mentees with unfulfilled promises.Communicate: Even though you may not be formally mentoring your mentee anymore, that doesn't mean you cannot communicate with them. If you'd still like to stay connected to your mentee, find a time to talk and put in into your calendar. I know a mentor who called his former mentee every Sunday night at 8pm for years. Especially as your mentee grows and matures, It truly is fun to watch them go from child to adult and mentee to peer. Affirm them: Anytime someone leaves a mentee who has been left before, it can create an opportunity for the enemy to creep in and lie to them. I would believe things like “I did something wrong”, “I'm unlovable”, and  “This is always going to happen”. If you get the sense that your mentee is feeling abandonment by your leaving, dispel those potential lies by stating the truth: Say “You did nothing wrong and I still care for you”, “You are lovable. This is more about me than you.” and “People will come and go, but that doesn't mean they don't love you.”Ending a relationship, especially with a mentee who you have grown close to, will always be a tough deal. But you can facilitate closure in a healthy way by celebrating what the Lord did in your relationship and setting your mentee up for future mentoring relationships. All good things must come to an end, and mentoring is no different. 

KindnessKindness has that middle-child syndrome. Yes, it's a fruit of the Spirit. But I think we have a funny relationship with the word. We know that we are to be kind. We know a few people who we would describe as kind.But if we're being honest, do we really STRIVE for kindness? I think we relegate it to “random acts of kindness” or consider it to be a name of a granola bar, or (if you're from Waco) you know we have “Be Kind” coffee shops here!But, how important is kindness, and it is a quality that makes us quiet, meek, and timid?NO!Remember, after David recounted all his many savage military triumphs in 2 Samuel 8, we see him sitting on his throne asking himself and everyone around him is there anyone left in the house of Jonathan that he can show KINDNESS to!!!! Kindness was David's goal! So, how can it be ours?Think Kindness. Is Jesus holding your thoughts captive? Are you meditating on God's word? Do you strive to have self-control in your thought life? Sometimes, I get bugged by people who aren't like me. When I think a hurtful thought about someone I don't see eye to eye with, I stop and center on one redeeming quality about the person no matter how long it takes.Speak Kindness. Make yourself say kind words to and about people. Bite your tongue when you need to. The Bible says we are to be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger. When you feel yourself speaking overly critical about someone, stop!Do Kindness. Act on the Spirit's prompting, especially when its inconvenient! Practice kindness and see the benefits. I promise you'll want more of it in your life.Make the KINDNESS challenge something you and your mentee can do together. Challenge each other and encourage each other! It will be a fun and bonding experience. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

Am I Qualified?When people consider starting a mentoring relationship with a child, one question that seems to always pop up is “Am I qualified?” After all, investing into the life of a child is a big deal.But I think we are asking the wrong question. Instead of asking Am I qualified?”, start asking “Am I a couple steps ahead of my mentee?”If you are, then you have something to offer. Mentoring is not about having all the answers. It's about allowing someone to accompany you on the journey of life. It's about entering into someone else's world and allowing them to enter into yours. This takes a large amount of courage and humility. Show them every part of your life. The good and the bad. Let them observe how a Christian handles everything that this world throws at you. John Maxwell said “If you want to impress people, tell them about your successes. If you want to impact people, tell them about your failures.”All of us are a work in progress. The goal is not perfection or having all it all figured out. The goal is to become more like Jesus. I hope you are learning new things in all areas of your life. Professionally. Physically. Relationally. And most importantly, spiritually. 1 Corinthians 11:1 says “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”As a a mentor, following the example of Christ looks like this:Christ loved unconditionally.He forgave his enemies. He accepted people, just like they were. He spend time with God the FatherHe pursued the things of God instead of the things of this world. So are you a couple steps ahead of your mentee in life?Are you doing your best to follow Christ?Are you willing to allow your mentee into your life and give them an example to follow? If the answer to all of those questions is “yes”, then I believe you are qualified to mentor. And I am confident that the Lord can use you to poisitvely impact the life of a child. Because the Lord loves to use the most unassuming characters to do his work. Moses was given up at birth and a murdered a man. David was a shepherd boy.Mary had a demon and Paul persecuted Christians. All were used mightly by God. If God can use them, then he can surely use you. One of my favorite scriptures is 1 Thessalonians 5:24 “He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.” And if you are watching this video, I'd say there is a pretty good chance that you believe God has called you to make disciples through mentoring. It was God who called you. And he is faithful. He will surely do it. How kind of him to let us have a front row seat as we watch him impact the life of your mentee. You Can Mentor.   --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

Faithfulness over FruitfulnessEarly on in my mentoring journey, I thought mentoring was like a math equation. A + B = CIf I showed up + Gave them some wisdom = Growth in my menteeIf I'm being honest, in my naivite, I thought my presence would solve all of my mentees issues. I thought, because of me, my mentee would improve academically. They would grow spiritually.It was only a matter of time before they became their best self. But what happened when my mentee didn't grow as fast as I thought they should? How would bad grades or negative behaviors affect our relationship? How would I respond when my mentee didn't seem to care about what I had to say?My friends Kyle and Mary mentored twelve kids when they were first married. They started with this group of young men when they were in junior high and continued to meet with them every Sunday until they graduated high school. For years, they invested a ton into these young men, and the young men were extremely grateful for their hospitality, wisdom, and guidance. Except for one young man. 11 of the boys said thank you every week. 1 did not. 11 of the boys said the group changed their life. 1 did not. 11 of the boys grew academically and spiritually. 1 did not. When the group game to an end, Kyle and Mary looked at each other and said “We sure did make a difference in 11 of the boys lives. Too bad we couldn't reach that 1 boy.”Fast forward about 20 years and Kyle is filling up with gas one afternoon. He sees a random man in his late thirties walking up to him. The man leans up against Kyle's car and says:“Excuse me. Is your name Kyle?”Kyle says “Yes. Can I help you?”The young man says “You probably don't remember me, but I just wanted to say thank you. I sat in your house every Sunday night for years and didn't say a word. I'm now a husband and a father and everything I know about leading my family I learned by being in your small group. I couldn't say it then, but here my say it now. Thank you.”And he walked off. It was that 1 young man. For decades, my friends thought that they had missed it with that young man. Because they focused on the fruit and what they could see in that young man, they thought they had failed. But the Lord had other plans. Here's the lesson: So often in mentoring, we want to focus on the fruit of our efforts with our mentee. When the fruit doesn't come, we can get discouraged. And when we get discouraged, often times we don't show up as often and we even consider quitting. We all want to see fruit. We want to see our mentees mature. Get good grades. Come to faith. Make good decisions. But we can't control that. All that we can control is being faithful. God's in chatge of the rest. You be faithful to show up, to encourage, and to listen. Be faithful to give them an example of Jesus everytime they see you. Be faithful to pray. To champion. To love unconditionally. You toss the seeds. God causes the growth in his perfect timing. This takes a remarkable amount of faith, but we have to trust that God has a plan for your mentee and that he loves them more than we do. In 1 Corinthians 3:6, Paul says “I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow.You may toss the seed, water the seed, and watch it grow. But often times, you play a part in the story of your mentee. You may toss the seed, but someone else may water it. And that's ok.Your mentee may rapidly improve and you may see fruit. Or, just like that one kid, you may not see any fruit and it may feel like a waste of time. But you never know what the Lord is doing underneath the hood. Often times, more is happening than we think. In mentoring, focus on what you can control. Focus on being faithful, instead of being fruitful. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSI want to paint a mental picture for you on the canvas of your mind: Imagine our IDENTITY in Christ being a firm foundation. The bedrock that Jesus talks about when he mentions the wise builder who built their house on rock instead of sand. We should always consider our identity as being firmly rooted like the foundation of the Golden Gate Bridge that runs over 100 feet deep down into bedrock to sustain the wind, ocean currents, and incredible weight of its load. Our IDENTITY in Christ is forever. Our foundation should be unwavering. It is the perfect support for the actions of our PURPOSE. So, if identity is the foundation, purpose is the dwelling built upon it! It is the construction of our life's walls and roof. If we have a high sense of identity but no practice of our purpose, what good does it do anyone? A slab is not a house! In the Bible, James tells us that forgetting our PURPOSE is like walking away from a mirror and forgetting what our face looks like. We must be DOERS of the word. James 1:22-25So, our purpose is the house built on the foundation of our lives. Our community is who dwells inside! Your purpose is meant to be fleshed out with the people who make up your community. It is building a house and inviting people inside it!Who makes up your community? Are they people who reinforce your identity and purpose or do they distract you from living out who you are in Christ? COMMUNITY is powerful. It's why we encourage our mentees to surround themselves with healthy and positive people who will be an encouragement. It's why we invite them to church and why we meet with them every week to chat and pray together. Christians are not called to exit general culture for the sake of their own holiness. If that were true, no one would hear the Gospel because there would be no one to preach it! However, our mentees should be mindful about who they let into their close “community” as they will be impacted by them. As people, we rub off on each other!Encourage your mentee to be a light in the darkness but also remain in community with those who love Jesus and have a true sense of who they are and why they're here!   --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSKing David had a high sense and value for HIS OWN identity, purpose, and community, therefore he was FREE to speak into and bless Mephibosheth's IPC as well! -Identity: David sits comfortably on his throne and yells Mephibosheth! -Purpose: David gives Mephib's rule over Saul's kingdom and is not threatened-Community: David invites Mephib to eat at his family's table daily because he knows there's enough foodOur PURPOSE is a direct result of our IDENTITY. How do I know what I'm supposed to do? It all starts with who I am!One Friday morning I woke up went out to the garage and started working on some furniture for our living room. Fast forward to an hour later when I was sitting in the ER having nearly cut off my toe. The problem was rooted in using the wrong tools for the job and being ill-equipped for the potential dangers of the task. If I had a higher respect for what could happen, I wouldn't have been wearing flip flops while using power tools in the garage.There is always a danger in using a tool in a way that goes outside of its identity. Ever use a crescent wrench as a hammer (let's be honest, we use everything as a hammer!) I once used a pocket knife to unsuccessfully pick a lock (yes I still have the scar on my finger). Ok, yes, I have a track record for confusing a tool's identity with its intended purpose because I'm lazy and don't wanna go get the right tool out of the toolbox!  When we respect and value our IDENTITY as children of God, we make better choices when considering our intended PURPOSE in life which is to worship and serve the Lord! That, in turn, gives us confidence to care for and speak into our mentees' purpose.  --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSKing David had a high sense and value for HIS OWN identity, purpose, and community, therefore he was FREE to speak into and bless Mephibosheth's IPC as well! -Identity: David sits comfortably on his throne and yells Mephibosheth! -Purpose: David gives Mephib's rule over Saul's kingdom and is not threatened-Community: David invites Mephib to eat at his family's table daily because he knows there's enough food“Reading” a mentee's IPC will help you understand if she has a clear understanding of who she is in Christ, if she is living out her call, and if she is surrounding herself with the people who will help her be successful in her journey! This is huge! There is ONE GOLDEN RULE when considering our Identity – it is FOREVER! Many people confuse PURPOSE for IDENTITY. Try asking someone who they are. Often, they will tell you what they DO. “I'm a banker” “I play football” “I'm an artist” These things are good and often consume the majority of our waking hours. But, they are not our identity. They change over time. They can be taken away.One thing we love about King David is his being “a man after God's own heart.” When we understand that our one and only IDENTITY is being a child of God, we realize every other title in life is temporary and pales in comparison to the identity we have in Christ.Romans 8:15-17 tells us we have “received the Spirit of adoption as sons (and daughters) and that the “Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs – heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ.”This truth should result in a confidence that is palpable. How do we speak into the hearts and bless the lives of our mentors? By knowing we belong to God, who is our loving King and parent, forever! And that truth is not up for debate. It cannot be bought. It cannot be lost or burned up in a fire. Our IDENTITY is in Christ and Christ alone! --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

“IPC”-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)-Identity, Purpose, and Community are three things we are presented with about King David in 2 Samuel 8. -Identity: 2 Samuel tells us David was a mighty warrior and a shrewd leader.-Purpose: Based on his being a warrior and leader, he was successful in battle and made smart leadership choices while subduing his enemy and growing his empire! -Community: This chapter ends with a list of men David trusted to rule over aspects of his kingdom.A quick summary: David is a fierce warrior (Identity). Therefore, he conquered the Philistines (Purpose). Joab was over David's army (Community). Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSAs mentors, we know these are transferable. In 2 Samuel 9, David, having confidence in his own IPC is able to convey these qualities onto Jonathan's son, Mephibosheth. -Identity: David yells Mephibosheth! -Purpose: David reinstates Mephib's rule over Saul's kingdom -Community: David invites Mephib to eat at his family's table dailyIf this story from the OT is foreign, READ IT! “Reading” a mentee's IPC will help you understand if she has a clear understanding of who she is in Christ, if she is living out her call, and if she is surrounding herself with the people who will help her be successful in her journey! --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

This Mentoring Minute deals with a really good question you can ask your mentee to start some high-quality conversation. Back in youth group, we would trace out somebody's silhouette on a piece of butcher paper and have students fill in the space with what a Christian looks like. It was hilarious to watch the paper person come alive with a Christian bookstore t-shirt, a WWJD bracelet, multiple bibles and concordances in hand, other modest clothing and a John 3:16 sign with clown wig for the football games.So we know by now that Christ-followers come in all shapes and sizes. But, there are three things we know about what a Christian needs to look like and they come from Jesus' words in Mark 8:34. “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.”--Denying yourself – Oh what a powerful trait for the Christian! To deny yourself is to know your cravings and comforts and anything that will keep you from God and saying NO to them. Self-denial is about sacrifice! It is a daily choice to forgo our own motives and actions for the Lord's! To help your mentee understand this point, share what things you have denied yourself that have strengthened your faith.Taking up our cross – The Cross of Christ is our call as well in life and I know that sounds heavy but we follow Jesus' example when we realize our PURPOSE and live in obedience to what He has for us. We don't take up a cross that offers salvation for others. We do take up a cross out of obedience to God so we can do the work He has planned for us. Be prepared to talk about specific crosses you have taken up in your faith journey. Following Jesus – This is the best part. Imagine God telling us to deny ourselves, get to work on this earth for Him but then Him leaving us with no direction or guidance. We would be lost! But instead, Jesus says I have a plan and I will be revealing it to you as we walk through life together. --It's his PRESENCE in our lives that gives us the motivation to deny ourselves, the power to take up our cross, and the willingness to follow!Be sure to make the connection with your mentee that it's your hope to reflect Christ as a mentor. That as you follow Jesus and enjoy communion with him your prayer is that your mentee will follow him as well and have communion with Jesus and you as a mentor. –Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

All of us are here today because of our relationship with “that person”. You know, the one who made a profound impact on your life. For me, a few men made me who I am today. It was a man named Bob who invested into me when I was in college and helped me see my need for Jesus. It was a man named John who discipled me and taught me how to read the scriptures. It was a man named Steve who showed me the father heart of God and helped me overcome my fatherless past. Who got you to where you are today? Who has invested into you?Whether it was a parent, professor, coach, or someone else, all of us are who we are today because of the investment of others.You are here today to learn how to invest into others. You could be “that person” for your future mentee. There are million of kids today who could use a positive adult to come alongside them to support and love them. Some of our kids are dealing with some pretty tough challenges, such as fatherlessness, poverty, and abuse. Others could use another adult to comfort them during hard times and to pick them up when they fall down. We all could use as much encouragement as we can get. We believe that is the job of a mentor: To make a disciple: “Follow me as a follow Christ.” 1 Corinthians 11:1A disciple is a follower. You follow Christ and your mentee gets the opportunity follow you. Kids will experience Jesus as they experience you. What an amazing opportunity to show them the love of Christ through your relationship. You get to teach them with your words and show them with your actions what it means to follow Jesus Christ. The bible tells us to love God, love others, and make disciples. You love God. Mentoring is an excellent way to love others. And you have the joy to disciple them by creating a relationship based on trust, grace, and truth. To fulfill potential: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6We want to be a support and guide as your mentee grows and matures. Our desire is to offer wisdom and instruction when they face obstacles in their journey. As they trek down this path of life, we are on the sidelines championing them. We have the opportunity to teach tangible skills, as well as how to navigate the emotional, mental, and relationsal twists and turns of life. A mentor's job description:SHOW UP: Showing up is the most important thing you can do as a mentor. How do you build any successful relationship? You spend time with that person.You learn new things about them and you experience life with them. You make them feel important. You make them feel valued. You make them feel like you matter. And you do that by showing up.BUILD UP: Our desire is for our mentors to speak truth into the lives of our mentee. We want our mentors to encourage our mentees with every word that comes out of their mouth. Our words matter. Our tone matters. Our facial expressions and body language matter. We want our Forerunners to know that their mentors are for them, no matter what.SHARE JESUS: As a mentor, you cannot give away what you don't have. More than anything, we want our mentees to love Jesus Christ with all of their hearts. They will learn how to do that by emulating you. We are not here to produce good men. We are here to produce followers of Christ.--Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

We've all done it. We have said something like “Wow, Brian is the best. He is such a good kid.” You may think there's not a thing wrong with that statement. But what about this one, “Geez. Brian is the worst. He is such a bad kid.” While we wouldn't think to say that about or to a kid, we should at least recognize that both statements exist on the same spectrum of thought and action.But what's the worst part of thinking about someone (or something) as being bad? Well, bad things don't go back to being good! Nothing in your refrigerator that goes bad gets good again, no matter how many Bible studies those cartons of milk attend!There is a permanence to our thinking and words that we need to be extra careful of when it comes to how we speak to and about our mentees!We know there is a lot at stake when we read James 3: “We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.Here are three things to remember that will help us shore up the intentionality and shore up the effects of our words:--Choose Your Words Wisely. Think before you speak. Remember that in some ways, your mentee is like a court reporter – remembering every word you say on the recorder in their brain. In other words: Know your audience! Realize the context! Read the room!Your Intent is Hard to Measure. How many times have you had to say, “that wasn't what I meant!” or “I was just joking.” Speaking of the courtroom once more, our intent is a very weak defense. It doesn't matter what we meant to say, it only matters what our mentee heard! Be Able to Say, “I'm Sorry.” This valuable reminder needs to be a part of every Mentoring Minute episode. Our mentees learn more about what it means to be a Christian during times of conflict and restoration than they do when times are easy, and everyone is friendly, and circumstances are optimal. Be transparent. Model a peacemaker mentality and approach to relationships.--There is no such thing as a “bad” kid. There are, unfortunately, some very unhealthy kids out there who had to endure trauma or abuse and who lacked the basic care and attention that many of us enjoyed during our formative years. Let's commit to loving our mentees well and remembering OUR WORDS MATTER.

Safety is the name of the game when it comes to mentoring. You always want to have safety on the mind when you are hanging out with your mentee. First priority is always to keep the child safe, but another aspect of safety is following rules and procedures so you stay above reproach and free of any possible accusation. One of the best ways to keep everyone safe in the mentoring journey is called the rule of three. The rule of three means that there are always three parties involved when you are hanging out with your mentee. The third person can be a crowded place, a friend of yours or the mentee, or a member of your family or the mentee's family. In our organizations, the rule of three is something that we stress to every mentor, no matter age or experience. Of course we realize that, from time to time, you will be found alone with your mentee. Here are some tips to make those rare times more safe.Car ride: Perhaps you are picking them up for a car ride. If you find yourself in that position, it is vital that you let someone, either a parent or your mentoring organization, know when the mentee gets in the car with you and when you get to your desired location. Room: If you find yourself in a room alone with your mentee, make sure to let other people around know you are in there and keep the door open. Event: Try your hardest to get someone else to go with you. Whether it be a mentee's friend or sibling or your own child, spouse, or friend. If you ever find yourself in a situation that doesn't seem safe, do whatever you can to get out of that situation immediately and communicate the situation with either the parent or the mentoring organization. We recommend never doing an overnight. We understand that relational depth and capital are vital to an effective mentoring relationship, but we must pursue those things within the boundaries of a safe relationship. If you want to have a private talk, perhaps have it at a local park. If you need to have a hard conversation, try going for a walk around the neighborhood. Yes, following safety guidelines will add some challenges to your mentoring relationship, just like stopping at a red light, wearing a seat belt, and driving the speed limit slow you down a bit. But they are vital to keep everyone safe. The rule of three is a non-negotiable in any mentoring relationship I am a part of. When in doubt, over-communicate with a third party, especially a parent. We want to stay above reproach for all parties involved. The stakes are too high when it comes to the safety of your mentee. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

In my line of work, I hear these three little words all the time. They come after I give something to someone usually or offer to help someone do something. My nonproof is based on Jesus's words to his disciples: “Freely you've been given, freely give,” so I practice the act of remembering whatever I have is really God's and not mine anyway.WE'RE NOT CALLED TO DO THINGS HALF-HEARTEDWhen I hear someone ask, “are you sure?” it has less to do with their questioning my decisiveness or integrity and more to do with their processing a kindness. And that's ok! But I still take a minute and usually say something like, “about ten years ago I stopped saying and doing things I wasn't absolutely sure about!” And it's true!NO REGRETS!What's the best thing about being certain in what we do and say? We usually don't regret our decisions. Making a choice/decision with all of who we are means we have considered the options and are comfortable moving forward. We're not second-guessing ourselves, and there's a wonderful freedom in that.--3 STEPS TO PRACTICING CERTAINTY IN OUR DECISIONS AND MODELING IT FOR OUR MENTEESListen To Jesus. He said in Matthew 5 that we're foolish to make oaths on anything in heaven, on earth, or even on ourselves because when did we get the power to even turn a hair white or black?? Jesus instructs us to be practical. Simply say “yes” and “no” and then do what we say we're gonna do! That should be enough.Wait a beat. Give yourself time and space when making a decision. Don't let your mouth get out ahead of your brain. Pray about it! Think about it. Once you feel you can make a decision that all your faculties agree on, then say yes or no.Remember you're human. I very rarely go back on my word. But sometimes, I do! And man, I beat myself up about it. But when those times happen, I ask forgiveness from the person I've slighted. I try to make it up to them and finally, I give myself a break!--There will be limitless opportunities for you to practice consistency and show integrity with your words and actions as you mentor someone. I hope you will make it a priority for your words to matter and that you will set a good example for this with your mentee. Isaiah 55:11 reminds us that every word that goes forth from God's mouth does not return to him void. God does not make empty promises! If he has given you a word on something, you can trust him to make good on it. We can stand on God's word. After all, his word is his bond! Let's stand on that. Let's rest in that. Let's reflect that by practicing consistency between what we do and say. Let's model that for our mentee. Are you sure? Yes, I am. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us!Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

I hate to fly. I hate everything about it. Getting up 72 hours before your flight so you can drive to a crowded airport with terrible parking. I hate the 19 lines you wait in to do all the things. Take your shoes off. Put your belt back on while scurrying to go buy a $12 bottle of water in a gift shop so you can sit on the floor next to a power outlet and charge your phone. Hurry up and wait. Do you have unassigned seating on your flight? Well, that's just the worst. The anxiety of standing in a batch of people waiting to get on the plane in groups is only rivaled by the anxiety you feel when making that right turn into the plane hoping that you'll find an empty seat towards the front of the plane. Good luck with that!Once you do find some room in the overhead for your bag and an open seat, it's time to open the little plastic air nozzle that wheezes recirculating humid passenger farts from everyone in the tin can onto the top of your head and lap as you wait for the violent take off.But before they hit the friendly skies, all passengers are treated to some safety instructions where they discover there are overhead breathing apparatus and floating seat cushions. Flight staff is quick to remind us that adults sitting next to children should put on their own masks first and then see to their kids.WHAT A MENTOR CAN LEARN FROM THE PREFLIGHT INSTRUCTIONS:-We THRIVE so they can THRIVE. If the adult on a flight doesn't take care of their own breathing mask first, they're not gonna be any good to anybody! The same is true of mentors. If we are barely surviving, we will struggle to help our mentees thrive. -It needs to be said. When you're young, your reflex is to look out for yourself. When you're a parent, your knee jerk response is to see to your child. The airline gives the instruction to remind us as parents that we must first take care of us so we can take care of them.  -There is too much at stake! Airlines give us emergency instructions because the stakes are high! It's the same with mentoring. We never want to do damage within this relationship.Three Steps to Healthy Mentoring  Be Proactive. Make sure you are putting on that Armor of God before leaving the house! Is your faith strong? Are you growing in your faith? Do you have the margin of time and effort it takes to be a consistent and healthy mentor? If so, great! If not, what will it take to get there?Communicate. We all have some turbulence in our lives that make us less-than-optimal mentors. You'll forget a meet up. You'll be distracted sometimes or say the wrong thing to your mentee. When these things happen be quick to apologize and see everything as a teachable moment. Ask your mentee to forgive you. Practice and model conflict resolution. Your mentee will learn a lot from how you handle things.Know when to make adjustments, hit the flight attendant button, or pull the plug altogether. You may need to pause meeting with your mentee so you can see to yourself. You may need to call in reinforcements. There are also times when you just need to cancel meeting altogether. Each of these decisions takes prayer, counsel, and wisdom. As in all areas of life, decisions are best made in community. Proverbs 15:22 reminds us that “plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed.” I may always prefer driving cross country to flying, but when I do fly, it's good to be reminded that as mentors the health of our relationship with our mentee is 100% dependent on the health of our relationship with Christ. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com

If you've ever hiked up a mountain, it is no easy endeavor. There are easy parts and there are hard parts. Storms can pop up from time to time. Times of fun and times where you are challenged. But if you stick it out, the view is almost worth the struggle it took to get there. One thing I know to be true about climbing a mountain is it is always easier when you do it with other people. People can pick you up when you fall down. Can encourage you when you get tired. Can celebrate with you when you hit a check point. People who can champion you to do what you set out to do. The same is true with mentoring. It's always better when you do it with other people. Mentoring alone is very difficult. Why? Because often times the “wins” in mentoring are few and far between. I have found that most mentors experience discouragement at some point in their mentoring journey. And when discouragement hits, it's usually downhill from there. A typical pattern may look something like this. Get discouraged. Start believing this isn't workingNegative outlook or bad attitudeStop pursuingRelationship dissolvesBut mentoring is all about persevering. It's all about continuing to show up over and over and over. It's about, like Jesus with us, overcoming the hard and being there for your mentee no matter what. When you begin mentoring, it's always a good idea to surround yourself with people who can help you on your mentoring journey. Here are some potential key members of your mentoring tribe. Organization (Church / non-profit / school)Best practicesCreate events to participate inHold you accountableFamilyCheer you on and celebrate when good things happen with your menteeHelp share the load, as they build relationships with your menteePray for your menteeFriendsMentoring in a small group is an excellent way to team up to advance the Kingdom. You already live life together. Might as well do it on mission. Like having an assistant coach. Maybe they have expertise where you don't. One more adult to look up to. Your tribe can:Help you stay encouragedSpeak truth when you are believing liesCreate a safe place to vent about hard timesHold your proverbial mentoring arms up when they get tired like aaron did with moses. Give you new ideas on how to engage with your mentee or how to overcome an obstacle with your mentee. Help open up opportunities for your menteePray for you and pray with you. Champion you to stay in the mentoring game for the long haul. Provide respite if you have a difficult season or unforeseen circumstance pop upJust like climbing a mountain, or going on any journey, is better with a tribe of people, mentoring for the long haul is easier when you are surrounded by people who love you and who are for you. So find your tribe. Be open about your mentoring needs, opportunities, struggles, and victories. Share the load and allow others to hold your arms up when you get tired. Mentoring is always better with other people. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com.

Giving GiftsGiving gifts or purchasing things for your mentee is one of the more complicated topics you will face as a mentor. You want to be able to show your care and affection for your mentee through giving gifts, but so often they can become distractions in your mentoring relationship. Let me be the first to say that this is a gray topic. It is not black and white. We are just giving you our perspective that we gained through years of mentoring. We never want our mentee or their family to:See us as an ATMTo hang out with us to get somethingConfuse our mentee when we don't give them everything they wantThis is especially difficult when the gifts you want to purchase are considered necessary items. We have had mentees who:Needed new shoesNeeded a bedNeeded groceriesWhen needs like this pop up, we suggest you use your connections to a non-profit organization or a church to partner with your mentee to take care of those needs. We highly recommend building a relationship with other ancillary organizations such as food banks, clothing closets, and churches. If you want to provide basic items, we're ok with that, as long as the mentee and their family know it's coming from someone other than you. This is a benefit to mentoring with a specific organization - they can be the fall guy when someone asks you for a gift. You can blame it on them. But there is a difference between a want and a need. We recommend that you do not purchase your mentee anything with the exception of a birthday present. We recommend that you place a $25 cap on the birthday gift that you purchase. An occasional purchasing of food and treats is another thing. Perhaps you want to take your mentee to a game or movie. Those are ok as long as you follow the rule of three and you make sure it doesn't turn into something the mentee expects. Your presence is enough. Obviously this is assuming basic needs are being provided, the best gift you can give your mentee is love and relationship. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com.

Mentoring is BaseballDid you know that the average of every baseball player in the hall of fame is a combined .303. That means if you hit the ball 303 out of 1,000 times, you are considered one of the greatest baseball players of all time. That's 697 misses!3 out of every 10 makes a great baseball player. And I could say the same is true for mentoring. When I first became a mentor, I wanted a home run every time. I thought my mentee would love me and tell me how great I was and earn straight A's while getting a full ride to Harvard. When those things didn't happen, I got disappointed. After a while, I adjusted my definition of success. Just hanging out wth my mentee was a basehit. A single, if you will. A smile was a double. A laugh was a triple. A solid conversation was a home run. I focused on plate appearances, not homeruns. I trusted that the Lord would do what he does if I just kept getting up to the plate.3 out of every 10. If you can have a great hang out or deep conversation 3 out of every 10 times, I'd say that'll put you in the mentoring hall of fame. The more swings the better, as the more you swing, the more chances you get at contact. Just like the more you hang out with your mentee, the more chances you get at connecting. Don't worry about swinging for the fences or home runs. Just focus on taking your swings and seeing what happens. Mentoring is Baseball. 

Logic Model A logic model is a tool used by nonprofits to illustrate their impact. It is a one-page explanation of the connections between what you plan to put into a program and what you expect to deliver. It can serve as a powerful tool for focusing and articulating vision. It also serves as a built-in monitoring system to check in on programs, compare to goals, and make adjustments when needed. Finally, it can also increase donors and funders' trust in the organization that is willing and able to strategically plan programs, measure their effectiveness, and prove the value of each investment.-- The logic model does three main things:-    It connects the dots for donors and funders between what you say you need and what you promise to produce.-    It builds credibility for your organization because you clearly show the logic behind your decisions – why you decided to do what you do and how you can prove it worked.-    It unites the focus of staff around the key deliverables in a program.--They are usually constructed around just one program, with many nonprofits building a logic model for each major program they have. You can make a logic model for an existing or planned program. The Five Categories: Inputs: Nickname: The RecipeQuestion: What Do We Need? This category captures all you plan to put into the particular program. It includes materials, supplies, staff time, building usage, curriculum, in-kind donations, etc… anything it takes to make the program run. Think of it as “the recipe”. Activity: Nickname: The ActionQuestion: What Will We Do With our Program? This is what you plan to do with all of the inputs to accomplishing your desired result. It is a straightforward listing of the activities you plan to do. This could include things like classroom instruction, live events, seminars, free lunches, etc. This is the action that you will do. Outputs: Nickname: The Results Question: What happened? This is what you expect to happen as a natural result of your activity. This is NOT a measure of effectiveness, but a measure of what happened. If the activity was to hand out fliers, your output would be number of fliers handed out. Many nonprofits focus on measuring and communicating outputs. If the activity was giving seminars around the world, an output could be number of miles flown by instructors. Outputs will almost always begin with “number of x.” Outcomes: Nickname: The Change Question: What Good Did it Do? This is perhaps the most important element of the logic model. Outputs are the measurements that capture what changed from how things were before you did your activity. Strong outcomes will show positive changes in areas that logically connect to your program's intended impact. These measurements require prior planning, because you will need baselines to illustrate where the population was before your intervention and where they are now as a direct result of your action. Outcomes will almost always start with “percentage change in x.” Impact: Nickname: The Hope Question: What Are We Going to Change? The impact portion of a logic model is a simple, straightforward statement explaining what you hope to see for this population 8-10 years from now. --Find an example on our website under the tab "downloadables".--Contact Kayce at http://savenineconsulting.com/ and find out more at www.youcanmentor.com--Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. 

Identity-Based vs. Skill-Based Mentoring“Just like a good tool doesn't make you a handy man. Knowing skills alone doesn't fulfill your mentee's potential” Skill-based mentoring usually goes like this: Think of things you think your mentee should knowShake a hand, tie a tie, resume, etc…Teach them these thingsHope they use them to reach their full-potential--Skill-based mentoring is good, but I believe it is secondary to Identity-based mentoringSkills are no good if you're mentee believes:They lack intelligence or can't succeedThey will never amount to anythingThey lack confidence, hope or have no self-value--Let's start with identity-based mentoring first.Help them see themselves how God sees them. Encourage, build up, & champion your menteeBe the most encouraging person in the world--When they believe this, they will have intrinsic motivation to learn the skills. They will be hungry to become all that they can be because they believe in themselves and have someone believing in them. Now that they believe they have worth and are capable of success, introduce the skills. First identity. Then skills.--Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com.

Connection over Content - Let's keep it simple:Pursue Kids: Are you going after them?Pursue Jesus: Are you staying filled up so you can pour out?-What does it mean to connect?Are you reaching out consistently?Are you interested in what they are interested in?Are you remembering important issues in their life?Are you showing up? Games, events, etc…Are you speaking life? When they leave your presence, how do you want them to feel?-“A kid doesn't care what you know until they know that you care” Mentors who invested into us - Often, we don't remember what they said, but we remember them showing up. We remember how they made me feel. Content is good. Teaching them things. Books. Pods. It is good... but it's secondary. Connection is primary. --Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com.