The Art of Manliness

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The Art of Manliness


    • Aug 10, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekdays NEW EPISODES
    • 45m AVG DURATION
    • 843 EPISODES

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    Latest episodes from The Art of Manliness

    Tactics and Mindset Shifts for Making the Most of Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2022 54:57

    Matthew Dicks wears a lot of hats. Among other things, he's a storyteller, communications consultant, writer, and schoolteacher. In order to excel in his professional life, as well as do what he loves in his personal life, he's developed a set of strategies that help him be more creative and productive, and can be used by anyone who wants to start making the most of life.Matt writes about these tactics and mindset shifts in his latest book Someday Is Today: 22 Simple, Actionable Ways to Propel Your Creative Life, and he shares some of them with us today on the show, including why you need to think in minutes, be an eagle rather than a mouse, practice deliberate incuriosity, and always do your best to act like a decent human being. Along the way, Matt and I talk about why you should floss in the shower and how restaurants that make guacamole at your table are a great example of the folly of making a thing, a thing.Resources Related to the PodcastMatt's previous appearance on the AoM Podcast: Episode #462 — How to Tell Better StoriesAoM Article: The 7 Habits — Begin With the End in MindMatthew telling the story of how he was robbed AoM Article: Possibilities in Spare MomentsConnect With Matthew DicksMatthew's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)

    Lonesome Dove and Life's Journey Through Uncertainty

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2022 66:21

    If you've been listening to this show or reading the AoM website for awhile, then you likely know what my favorite book of all time is: Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry.It's therefore my real pleasure to be able to talk all about that novel today with Steven Frye, professor of American literature and author of Understanding Larry McMurtry. We last had Steve on the show to talk about The Road by Cormac McCarthy. In this episode, we unpack Lonesome Dove, beginning with some background on McMurtry, and the style and themes he explores in his work. From there we turn to Lonesome Dove, and its surprising influences, from Jane Austen to Cervantes. Steve and I explore the characters of Augustus McCrae and Woodrow Call, how they can represent the archetypes of the Epicurean and the Stoic, and what we can learn from their friendship. We also talk about the complexities of other characters in the novel, and end our conversation with why Lonesome Dove, despite not having a stereotypically happy ending, is such a life-affirming book.A spoiler alert here: We are going to reveal plenty of plot points in this discussion, so be aware of that if you haven't yet read Lonesome Dove.After the show is over, check out the show notes at aom.is/lonesomedoveResources Related to the PodcastBooks by Steven Frye, including his novel Dogwood CrossingSteve's last appearance on the show: Episode #760 — Cormac McCarthy, The Road, and Carrying the FireLonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryLonesomeDove, the television miniseriesAoM Article: Why Every Man Should Read Jane AustenAoM Article: The Tragic, Liberating Message About Manliness Hidden in American Tall TalesSunday Fireside: Get on Your Horse and KickAoM Article: Gut Check — Are You a Contemptible Person?AoM Article: Books So Good I've Read Them 2X (Or More!)Connect With Steven FryeSteve's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)

    Future-Proof Your Body by Practicing Good Posture

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2022 38:56

    A lot of us have niggling bodily pains. A bum knee, a tight hip, an achy back. My guest would say that the cause of those maladies, as well as their cure, can likely be traced to a common source: your posture.His name is VinhPham and he's a physical therapist and the author ofSit Up Straight: Future-Proof Your Body Against Chronic Pain with 12 Simple Movements. Today on the show, Vinh explains the problems that can arise when we don't stand and sit properly, and simply sit too much in general, and how those problems can be prevented by practicing good posture. He explains what good posture looks like when you're sitting and standing, and the cues that will help keep your body well-aligned. Vinh shares the ideal ratio of sitting to standing to aim for throughout the day, and a better way to hold your phone so you don't get something called "tech neck." Vinh then walks us through some exercises you can do to address physical issues you may already have, from tight shoulders and hips to lower back pain.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: The Ultimate Guide to PostureAoM Article: De-Quasimodo Yourself — 6 Exercises to Counteract SlouchingAoM Article: 7 Simple Exercises That Undo the Damage of SittingAoM Podcast #213: Undoing the Damage of Chronic SittingAoM Article: The History, Benefits, and Use of Standing DesksConnect With Vinh PhamMyodetoxVinh on IG

    Developing the Warrior Within

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2022 47:11

    As a member of the Ottawa Tribe and someone who's worked with over five hundred tribal nations, my guest has long been inspired by his Native American culture and heritage, particularly the tradition of native warriors. And he thinks those warriors have much to teach all modern people about work, life, and leadership.His name is D.J. Vanas and he's the author of The Warrior Within: Own Your Power to Serve, Fight, Protect, and Heal. Today on the show, D.J. explains what the warrior spirit is, and how important it is for everyone to cultivate, especially those who want to lead, serve, and live with a purpose bigger than the self. He takes principles of Native American tradition and philosophy, including living off the land, taking a vision quest, counting coup, being a firekeeper, and developing toughness, and shows how they apply to anyone who's looking to develop resilience, achieve their goals, and make a positive impact on the world.Resources Related to the PodcastOttawa TribeAoM series: Lessons from the Sioux in how to develop situational awareness, mental and physical toughness, and spirituality, as well as how to turn a boy into a manAoM Podcast #526: The Rise and Fall of the Most Powerful Indian Tribe in American HistoryPodcast #633: The World and Vision of Lakota Medicine Man Black ElkAoM Article: You May Be Strong, But Are You Tough?AoM article on creating a personal mission statementAoM Article: 20 Battle Cries Through the AgesConnect With D.J. VanasD.J.'s Website

    Physical Benchmarks Every Man Should Meet, At Every Age

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2022 33:30

    As men, we all want to be physically capable. We want to be able to save our own life in two ways: in the more metaphorical sense of wanting to preserve it in healthy, fit form for as long as possible, and in the more literal sense of being able to make it through an emergency unscathed. How do you know if you do possess that kind of lifesaving physical capability?It's time to do more than wonder, and really check in with yourself. My guest today has some helpful benchmarks that guys from age 8 to 80 can use to see if they've got an operative level of strength, mobility, and conditioning. His name is Dan John, and he's a strength coach and the author of numerous books and articles on health and fitness. Dan walks us through the fitness standards the average male should be able to meet from childhood to old age, beginning with the assessments he gives to those who are 55 years old and older, which includes carrying their body weight, a long jump, and something called “the toilet test.” We then reach back to childhood, and Dan discusses the physical skills kids should become adept in, which were inspired by a turn-of-the-20th-century physical culturist who thought every individual ought to be able to save his own life, and which can be broken down into the categories of pursuit, escape, and attack. We end our conversation with the physical standards those in the 18-55 range should be able to meet, including how much a man should be able to bench press, squat, and deadlift, and the walking test that's an excellent assessment of your cardiovascular conditioning.Resources/Articles/People Mentioned in PodcastMy first and second interview with Dan10 Things Every Lifter Should Be Able to DoDon't Just Lift Heavy, Carry HeavyTake the Simple Test That Can Predict Your MortalityThe 10 Physical Skills Every Man Should MasterHow to Achieve Physical AutonomyThe History of Physical FitnessEvery Man Should Be Able to Save His Own Life12 Balance Exercises You Can Do on a 2×4Shaker PlateBreak Out of Your Cage and Stop Being a Human Zoo AnimalConnect With DanDanJohnUniversity.com (use code “artofman” for a discount) Dan on FacebookDan's website 

    Routines Are Overrated

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2022 43:21

    You struggle with being productive. So you decide you need to establish a routine for yourself. You get real gung-ho about this routine — this is going to be the thing that changes everything! But then you fail to stick to it. So you flagellate yourself for that failure and decide what you need is a different routine. But then you don't stick with that routine either. The cycle then repeats itself, leaving you no more productive than you were at the start.My guest, Madeleine Dore, found herself stuck in this cycle. So she decided to start interviewing successful creative types to get their secrets to an optimal routine. Yet these folks would confide to her a different secret: they actually didn't have a routine either.Madeleine has come to believe something that I've discovered too: routines aren't all they're cracked up to be and you can actually still be very creative and productive even if you go about each day in a looser, more ad-hoc fashion.Today on the show, I talk to Madeleine, who's the author of I Didn't Do the Thing Today: Letting Go of Productivity Guilt, about how the all-or-nothing thinking which surrounds routines can actually sabotage our effectiveness. We then discuss alternatives to keeping a strict routine that still allow you to get stuff done, including moving to a “portable routine,” taking advantage of “splodge time,” and embracing cycles and seasons in your work. We also discuss other ways to let go of unuseful productivity guilt, including setting realistic expectations and not eating the frog first.Resources Related to the PodcastHow to Live on Twenty-four Hours a Day by Arnold BennettAustin KleonAoM article on the “possibilities in spare moments”AoM article on Emerson, pear trees, and the seasons of lifeAoM article on famous men who took advantage of “splodge time” to become a successAoM Podcast #602: The Case for Being UnproductiveConnect With Madeleine DoreMadeleine's WebsiteMadeleine on IG

    Escaping the Safety Trap

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 20, 2022 45:28

    We like to think that our personal safety and the safety of our loved ones is something that other people — law enforcement, school administrators, social media moderators — will take care of for us. My guest today, Spencer Coursen, would say that while this mindset may help us feelsafe, it's actually when we feel the most safe, that we're in the greatest danger. Spencer — who's a combat veteran and a threat management expert — calls this paradox "the safety trap," and he's the author of a book of the same name. Today on the show, Spencer shares the factors that can put us in the safetytrap, and ways to escape it. We discuss how an avoidance mindset and a reliance on false authority can put us in greater danger, how the run-hide-fight rubric for responding to an active shooter has been misapplied, and how being too polite can get you killed. From there we turn to ways you can take responsibility for your own safety, including knowing the warning signs that someone may take violent action and staying physically fit. We also discuss what to do if people are sending you potentially threatening messages online.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: What to Do in an Active Shooter SituationAoM Podcast #513: Be Your Own BodyguardPodcast #688: Protection for and from HumanityRadio Lab: No Special DutyConnect With Spencer CoursenThe SafetyTrap WebsiteSpencer on LinkedInSpencer on Twitter

    What Made JFK So Compelling?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2022 43:02

    Despite assuming the presidency from the 20th century's narrowest election victory, John F. Kennedy captivated the American public's imagination, even before his untimely death.  What was it that made JFK so compelling in his own time, and continues to contribute to his enduring appeal today?We dive into the answer to that question by unpacking some of Kennedy's personal qualities and complexities with Mark Updegrove, author ofIncomparable Grace: JFK in the Presidency. We begin our conversation with how JFK's upbringing and war experience shaped him. We talk about his leadership style while in office, how he intentionally cultivated his cool and appealing image, and what his wife Jackie added to that image. Mark explains what was behind Kennedy's infamous affairs, and how JFK championed physical fitness despite being in tremendous physical pain himself. We end our conversation with the traits that worked both for and against JFK's success as president. Resources Related to the PodcastProfiles in Courage by John F. Kennedy Addison's DiseaseJFK on “The Soft American”JFK's Inaugural SpeechJFK's Moon SpeechAoM Article: Take the TR/JFK 50-Mile ChallengeConnect with Mark UpdegroveMark at the LBJ Presidential LibraryMark's Podcast: With the Bark Off — Conversations on the American Presidency

    The Philosophy of Self-Improvement

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2022 46:31

    There are thousands of books, podcasts, and social media posts about how to be more productive, strengthen your relationships, find your purpose, and be your all-around best self. And there are legions of programs and seminars out there designed to help you improve your life. All together, self-help represents a multi-billion dollar industry.But despite its ubiquity and cultural influence, you may never have thought about the deeper underpinnings of self-improvement. My guest has. In fact, her research led her to add being a life coach to her academic work as a professor of cultural history, surely creating one of the most unique career combinations. Her name is Anna Schaffner and she's the author of The Art of Self-Improvement: Ten Timeless Truths. Anna and I begin our conversation with how the idea of self-improvement, far from being a recent, Western phenomenon, traces back to antiquity and can be found across cultures. We discuss how self-help reflects what a culture values, and changes based on a culture's conception of selfhood, agency, and the relationship between the individual and society. From there we turn to a few of the timeless principles of self-improvement — self-control, being virtuous, and building positive relationships — looking both at how they were tackled anciently, as well as more modern angles that can also be helpful. We discuss the downside of taking a strictly Stoic approach to life, the idea of making virtue a habit, and how Dale Carnegie can be seen as a modern Machiavelli, in a good way. We end our conversation with Anna's four favorite self-improvement books.Resources Related to the PodcastAnna's previous appearance on the show — Episode #476: Are Modern People the Most Exhausted in History?AoM Podcast #377: 12 Rules for Life With Jordan PetersonBildungAoM Podcast #614 with Stephen Hayes, founder of Acceptance and Commitment therapyAoM Podcast #746: The Confucian GentlemanAoM Podcast #148: Trying Not to TryHow to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale CarnegieAnna's favorite self-improvement books:Meditations by Marcus AureliusThe Happiness Trap by Russ HarrisMan's Search for Meaning by Viktor FranklThe Power of Now by Eckhart TolleConnect with Anna SchaffnerAnna's Personal WebsiteAnna's Coaching Website

    Life Lessons From the World's Greatest Negotiator

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 11, 2022 47:29

    In 1981, Time magazine stated: “If you are ever in a crucial life-changing negotiation, the person you want on your side of the table is Herb Cohen.” Cohen was then known as the world's best negotiator, and had worked with Fortune 500 companies, professional athletes, and US presidents, and also penned the bestselling book You Can Negotiate Anything.Fast forward to today, and his son, Rich Cohen, has written a memoir of his father's life, and life philosophy, called The Adventures of Herbie Cohen: World's Greatest Negotiator. Today on the show, Rich shares stories from Herbie's life, from his colorful childhood on the streets of Brooklyn where he palled around in a gang with future famous figures like Larry King and Sandy Koufax, to coaching basketball in the Army, to becoming a sought-after strategist and dealmaker. Along the way, Rich shares the life lessons that grew out of those stories, including how power is perception, and why you need to care, but not that much.Resources Related to the PodcastLarry King tells the Moppo storyLarry King tells the Carvel storyAoM Article: How to Haggle Like Your Old ManPodcast #234: Haggling and Deal Making Advice From a FBI Hostage NegotiatorAoM podcast and article on the OODA LoopAoM Article: The 7 Habits — Think Win/WinSunday Firesides: Care, But Don't CareConnect With Rich CohenRich's WebsiteRich on Twitter

    Building a Second Brain

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2022 52:56

    In the modern age, people are bombarded with more information, and are more personally responsible for managing that information, than ever before. How do you stay on top of your schedule, work responsibilities, financial obligations, and the spigot of media that runs full force 24/7 while not only avoiding becoming overwhelmed, but actually using all that information to generate better ideas, advance your career, and generally improve your life?My guest would say that the answer lies in having a mind outside your mind. His name is Tiago Forte and he's the author of Building a Second Brain: A Proven Method to Organize Your Digital Life and Unlock Your Creative Potential. Today on the show, Tiago explains how a Second Brain is an external resource where you can store all of the most valuable checklists, thoughts, notes, ideas, and insights you acquire and generate. He explains how the Second Brain supercharges the historical practice of keeping a commonplace book, and how it improves your productivity and well-being by getting stuff out of your head, off your bandwidth, and into a place where you can actually put it to use. Tiago then walks us through this system of "Personal Knowledge Management," including the tools you can use to capture information, the question to ask yourself to decide what to capture, and why he recommends organizing what you capture around action instead of subject. And Tiago explains how the ultimate goal of having a Second Brain is to take what you put into this treasury and synthesize it into better ways to live, think, act, and express yourself.Resources Related to the PodcastCommonplace booksAoM Article: The Man Book — Creating a Reservoir of Timeless WisdomTiago's YouTube series on choosing a digital notes appDigital note-taking apps mentioned in the show:EvernoteNotionObsidian Google KeepMicrosoft OneNotePocket — an article-saving appTiago's blog post on his "PARA" organization systemConnect With Tiago ForteTiago's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code "manliness" at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors. 

    What It's Like to Spend a Year in Space

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2022 44:47

    In March of this year, Mark Vande Hei returned to earth after spending 355 days in outer space. Today on the show, I talk to Mark about what it was like to spend nearly a year in orbit, and how he ended up setting a new record for the longest spaceflight by an American astronaut. We first talk about how Mark went from being a soldier in the Army who served twice in Iraq, to working for NASA. Mark explains the application process for becoming an astronaut and what he thought were the hardest parts of his training. He then shares how you exercise in space, what a typical work day on the International Space Station is like, and how it feels to do a space walk. I ask Mark whether he was worried when the Russians threatened to abandon him in space, whether life on the space station is hard on morale, what it's like physically to return to earth, and whether there's a letdown when it's time to hang up your astronaut pack.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #654: How to AstronautUnited States Army Space and Missile Defense CommandVideo of Mark's time in spaceConnect With Mark Vande HeiMark on TwitterMark on LinkedInListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code "manliness" at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.Transcript Coming Soon

    How to Make a Good Argument

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2022 44:21

    Whenever you get into an argument, whether you're discussing politics with a colleague or the distribution of chores with your spouse, you likely feel like you're floundering. You feel worked up, but you don't feel like you're getting your point across, much less convincing the other person of it, and the conversation simply goes in circles. You can feel like a rank amateur at arguing.Maybe what you need are some pro tips from someone who's spent his life arguing competitively. Enter my guest: Bo Seo. Bo is a two-time world champion debater, a former coach of the Australian national debating team and the Harvard College Debating Union, and the author of Good Arguments: How Debate Teaches Us to Listen and Be Heard. Today on the show, Bo and I discuss why learning the art of rhetoric and debate was once an integral part of education in the West, why the subject disappeared from schools, and the loss this has represented for society. We then turn to the lessons Bo's taken from his debating career that you can apply to your own everyday arguments, whether big or small. Bo explains why it's important to establish what an argument is really about before you start into it, and shares a rubric for homing in on which of three types of disagreements may be at the core of a conflict. He then explains two things a strong argument has to do, and four questions to ask yourself to see if you've met these requirements. Bo also unpacks his three P's for creating persuasive rhetoric and how to effectively rebut someone else's claims. We end our conversation with how to determine when it's worth getting into a particular argument and when it's better to walk away.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM series on Rhetoric 101The Winston Churchill Guide to Public SpeakingThe Art of Rhetoric by AristotleAoM Podcast #639: Why You Should Learn the Lost Art of RhetoricAoM Podcast #799: Getting Along Is OverratedConnect With Bo SeoBo's Website

    The Fascinating Life of America's Forgotten Founding Father

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 27, 2022 56:54

    The 18th century doctor, civic leader, and renaissance man Benjamin Rush was one of the youngest signers of the Declaration of Independence, edited and named Thomas Paine's Common Sense, implemented medical practices that helped the Continental Army win the Revolutionary War, made sure Benjamin Franklin attended the Constitutional Convention, and shaped the medical and political landscape of the newly formed United States.Yet despite his outsized influence, the varied and interesting life he led, and the close relationships he had with other founding fathers like George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and John Adams, Rush is hardly remembered today. That's because of just how close his relationship with those other founders was. Rush was a personal physician to them and their families, and after his death, they suppressed his legacy, not wanting the intimate and unflattering details he had recorded in his letters and journals to be publicized. In fact, his memoir was considered too dangerous to be published and wasn't found for nearly 150 years.My guest will re-introduce us to this forgotten figure. His name is Stephen Fried, and he's the author of Rush: Revolution, Madness, and Benjamin Rush, the Visionary Doctor Who Became a Founding Father. Today on the show, Stephen takes us through Rush's fascinating life, from his self-made rise out of inauspicious childhood, to how he was able to reconcile an estranged Jefferson and Adams before his death, and what Stephen has learned from studying a character who lived through very fraught and not totally unfamiliar times.

    How to Develop Greater Self-Awareness

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2022 51:01

    95% of people say that they're self-aware. But only 10-15% of people actually are. As my guest today says, that means "on a good day, 80% of us are lying to ourselves about how much we're lying to ourselves" and this blind spot can have big repercussions for our success and happiness. Her name is Tasha Eurich, and she's an organizational psychologist and the author of Insight: Why We're Not as Self-Aware as We Think, and How Seeing Ourselves Clearly Helps Us Succeed at Work and in Life. Tasha kicks off our conversation by arguing that our level of self-awareness sets the upper limit of our individual effectiveness and that self-awareness can be developed and is truly the meta skill of the 21st century. She then unpacks what it is you know about yourself when you possess self-awareness, how there are two types of this knowledge, internal and external, and how you can have one without the other. Tasha then outlines the seven pillars of self-awareness, the barriers to getting insights into them --  including falling into the cult of self -- and how these barriers can be overcome, including asking yourself a daily check-in question. We then discuss how two of the most common methods for gaining self-knowledge -- introspection and journaling -- can in fact backfire and how to do them more effectively by asking yourself what instead of why, and actually journaling less instead of more. We also get into why you should be an in-former, rather than a me-former on social media, how to become more mindful without meditation, and how to solicit and handle feedback from other people, including holding something called the "Dinner of Truth."If reading this in an email, click the title of the post to listen to the show.Resources/People/Articles Mentioned in PodcastThe Science of InsightsHow to Get More "Aha" InsightsDefine Your Core Values7 Habits of Highly Effective PeopleYou Need a Reset DayGet Out of Your Mind and Into Your LifeWhy I Stopped Journaling4 Questions That Will Crush the Fear of Missing OutHow to Get Better at Taking FeedbackInsight QuizConnect With TashaTasha's websiteTasha on TwitterListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!) 

    Chef-Vetted Answers to Your Cooking FAQs

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2022 48:43

    In your quest to become a better home chef, you probably find yourself wondering things like: What potato should I use in this recipe? How much salt should I put in this dish? Am I even making spaghetti right? But then you forget to Google the answer to your question, or if you do, you feel overwhelmed by the number of opinions out there.Well, my guest will cut through that noise and answer some of your cooking FAQs once and for all. His name is Daniel Holzman and he's a chef and the co-author, along with Matt Rodbard, of Food IQ: 100 Questions, Answers, and Recipes to Raise Your Cooking Smarts. Today on the show, Daniel will offer his advice on whether the kind of onion and potato you use in a recipe matters, and whether it's okay to use frozen vegetables. He explains why you should be less worried about getting foodborne illnesses from meat, and the type of food that's more likely to make you sick. Daniel offers the lowdown on salt, including how to figure out exactly how much you need in a dish; when to use the convection bake function on your oven; his recommendations for the best frying pan and chef's knife; the secrets to making perfect spaghetti, scrambled eggs, and steak; and plenty of other tips as well.Resources Related to the PodcastDaniel's restaurants:The Meatball ShopDanny Boy's Famous Original PizzaAoM Article: The Best Way to Salt MeatAll-Clad 10-Inch Frying PanWusthof Classic 10" Chef's KnifeVictorinox 8" Chef's KnifeAoM Article: Cooking With Cast IronVideo of Daniel Making Honey Boo Boo's "Sketti"AoM Article: How to Make James Bond Scrambled EggsAoM Article: Grilling the Perfect SteakConnect with Daniel HolzmanFood IQ WebsiteDaniel on TwitterDaniel on IG

    The Secrets to Booking Cheap Flights

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 16, 2022 57:14

    Travel can offer a lot of good: memory-making adventure, mind-expanding experiences, and plenty of fun and relaxation. It's not surprising then that most people say they'd like to travel more than they do. What's keeping them from fulfilling that desire? Well, one obstacle, especially these days, is that the high price of plane tickets puts flying out of reach.My guest today can help you surmount this obstacle so you can get away more often. His name is Scott Keyes, and he's the founder of Scott's Cheap Flights and the author of Take More Vacations: How to Search Better, Book Cheaper, and Travel the World. Today on the show, Scott shares how scoring cheap flights can help you travel more often, the advantages of taking more frequent vacations, and the psychological benefit of planning your trips well in advance. We then get into the misconceptions people have about ticket pricing. From there we turn to Scott's strategies for booking cheap flights, beginning with why he recommends adopting a "Flight First" rather than "Destination First" approach. Scott shares the "Goldilocks" time window when cheap flights are most likely to pop up, the benefits of building flexibility into your itinerary, the days that are typically cheapest to fly, and his favorite search site to look for flights. He also explains how to use the 24-hour rule and Southwest Airlines as arbitrage in getting better prices on your tickets, and how to employ what he calls the "Greek Islands Strategy" to save money when flying internationally. We end our conversation with how to take advantage of "mistake fares," and whether the high prices you're seeing this summer are here to stay.Connect With Scott KeyesScott's Cheap FlightsScott on Twitter

    How to Turn a Boy Into a Man

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2022 58:51

    A lot of young men today struggle in finding their footing in adulthood. They feel lost, directionless, and unsure of who they are and how to confidently and competently navigate the world.Part of the reason for this is that most young men today lack something which was once a part of nearly every culture in the world, but has now almost entirely disappeared: a rite of passage.My guest today didn't want his son to flounder on the way to maturity, nor to miss out on having an initiation into manhood, so he set out to create a 6-year journey for him that would help him move from boy to man. His name is Jon Tyson, and he's the author of The Intentional Father: A Practical Guide to Raise Sons of Courage and Character. Today on the show, Jon unpacks the components of the years-long journey into manhood he created for his son, beginning with how he brainstormed those components by doing "The Day Your Son Leaves Home" exercise. We then discuss how old Jon's son was when he started his rite of passage and why it began with him having a "severing dinner" with his mom. We get into what his rite of passage consisted of, from the kickoff ceremony to the challenges, experiences, trips, and daily rituals Jon used to impart values and teach his son the "5 Shifts of Manhood." Jon shares how moving his son's focus from being a good man, to being good at being a man, helped him get remotivated to continue the process, why his rite of passage included a gap year after high school, and how Jon celebrated the end of his son's journey into becoming a man. We also discuss whether Jon did something similar with his daughter. We end our conversation with some key principles any dad can use to start intentionally helping their kids become well-rounded individuals who can confidently step out on their own and into the world.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: The Importance of FathersAoM Article: The Importance of Male Rites of PassageAoM Article: Male Rites of Passage From Around the WorldAoM Article & Podcast: Man's Need for RitualAoM Series on the origins, elements, and future of manhoodAoM Article: The 7 Habits — Begin With the End in MindAoM Article: The 3 Families Every Young Man Needs to Grow Up WellJames HollisAoM Article: Carry the FireArt of Manliness' Carry the Fire Zippo LighterAoM Article: What Is Manliness?AoM Podcast #527 With Richard RohrThe Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact by Chip and Dan HeathThe Way of Men by Jack DonovanAoM Podcast #49 With Jack DonovanAoM Series on the Four Archetypes of the Mature MasculineAoM Article: 100 Skills Every Man Should KnowAoM Article: 80+ Quotes on Men & ManhoodConnect With Jon TysonPrimal PathJon on TwitterJon on IG

    Why We Like Puzzles, and What We Get From Them

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2022 46:25

    Puzzles may seem like fairly pedestrian pastimes — fun ways to while away a rainy afternoon. And while they certainly do make for satisfying diversions, my guest would say they're also more than that, and can teach us plenty about life as well.His name is A.J. Jacobs, and he's the author of The Puzzler: One Man's Quest to Solve the Most Baffling Puzzles Ever, from Crosswords to Jigsaws to the Meaning of Life. Today on the show, A.J. explains what makes a puzzle a puzzle, and why we're drawn to them and enjoy them so much. We then discuss the charm of certain puzzles, from crosswords and Rubik's Cubes, to jigsaws and mazes. Along the way, we discuss some of the strategies behind solving these puzzles, and how these strategies can help you become an all-around better thinker and decision maker, and better at navigating the puzzling dilemmas of life itself.Resources Related to the PodcastA.J.'s previous appearance on the podcast — Episode #53: Experimenting With Your LifeMaki Kaji — the father of SudokuAoM Article: The Best Riddles for KidsA.J.'s wife's scavenger hunt company, Watson AdventuresWordplayThe Great Vermont Corn MazeTanya Khovanova's Math BlogKryptos — art sculpture with encrypted code on the grounds of the CIAApopheniaSunday Firesides: Take It Bird by BirdConnect With A.J. JacobsA.J.'s WebsiteA.J. on Twitter

    The Surprising Science Behind Building Stronger Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2022 46:05

    We've all heard by now just how important strong relationships are to our health and well-being. But a lot of the common advice and conventional wisdom out there about how to build stronger relationships doesn't end up taking us closer to that goal.My guest today has spent years sorting through what really builds better friendships, reignites love, and helps people get closer to others, and he shares these research-backed insights in his new book: Plays Well with Others: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Relationships Is (Mostly) Wrong. Eric shares what he's learned today on the show, beginning with why we're good at figuring out someone's personality from the moment we meet them, but bad at reading their thoughts and feelings, and how to get better at the latter by making other people more readable, as well as how to make a better first impression yourself. We then turn to what makes friendship a unique relationship that makes us uniquely happy, and the two "costly signals" that most develop friendship. We also get into why friends we feel ambivalent about are actually worse for us than outright enemies. We spend the last part of our conversation on how the modern age is both the worst and the best time for marriage, and how the key to ensuring that yours is one of the happiest in history is maintaining positive sentiment override.Resources Related to the PodcastEric's previous appearance on the show: #322 — Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) WrongAoM Article & Podcast: Why Your First Impression MattersAoM Podcast: #567: Understanding the Wonderful, Frustrating Dynamic of FriendshipHow to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale CarnegieAoM Podcast #772: How Long Does It Take to Make Friends?Arthur Aron's 36 Questions That Lead to LoveThe All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work by Eli FinkelAoM Articles: Why the Secret of a Happy, Successful Marriage Is Treating It Like a Bank Account and The Best Ways to Fund Your Relationship Bank AccountAoM Article & Podcast: How and Why to Hold a Weekly Marriage MeetingConnect With Eric BarkerEric's Website

    What Nietzsche Can Teach Us About Joyful Living in a Tech-Saturated World

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2022 46:53

    Friedrich Nietzsche is famous for espousing a philosophy that may be a help in wrestling with existential angst and finding meaning in life.My guest would say that Nietzsche's philosophy may also be useful for figuring out something else: how to have a healthy relationship with modern technology. His name is Nate Anderson and he's the author of In Emergency, Break Glass: What Nietzsche Can Teach Us About Joyful Living in a Tech-Saturated World. Today on the show, Nate, who's a deputy editor at the website Ars Technica, shares how someone who grew up loving technology and has spent his career writing about it, reached a point where he felt disenchanted with its effects on his life, and why he turned to the philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche for insights on how to approach tech more fruitfully. We then turn to the way tech has made life too safe, easy, and frictionless, and how Nietzschean goals, asceticism, and creative, self-overcoming exertion can help us find deeper fulfillment. Nate unpacks four Nietzsche-inspired guidelines for information consumption, the importance of the physical body in thinking and feeling, and our need to embrace greater Dionysian energy and perhaps live a bit more dangerously.   Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: A Primer on Friedrich Nietzsche — His Life and Philosophical StyleAoM Article: Say Yes to Life — An Accessible Primer on Nietzsche's Big IdeasAoM Article: Nietzsche's 66 Best AphorismsAoM Podcast #480: Hiking With NietzscheAoM Article: Solvitur Ambulando — It Is Solved By WalkingAoM Podcast #215: Becoming an Individual in an Age of Distraction (With Matthew Crawford)AoM Podcast #796: The Life We're Looking ForTwilight Zone episode “A Nice Place to Visit”Connect With Nate AndersonNate on Ars TechnicaListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code “manliness” at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.Transcript Coming Soon

    The Humble Heroics of Four of WWII's Most Decorated Soldiers

    Play Episode Listen Later May 30, 2022 53:40

    The Medal of Honor is the military's highest and most prestigious decoration and is awarded to a member of the United States Armed Forces who "distinguished himself conspicuously by gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of his life above and beyond the call of duty."During World War II, no U.S. unit would produce more Medal of Honor recipients than the Army's Third Infantry Division, and my guest profiles four of those recipients — Maurice Britt, Michael Daly, Keith Ware, and the famous Audie Murphy — in his new book Against All Odds: A True Story of Ultimate Courage and Survival in World War II. Today on the show, Alex explains how the prodigiousness of the Third Infantry Division was due to effective leadership, and the sheer fact that they were in combat so long, serving from the very beginning of the war in Europe to its very end. We then get into the stories of Britt, Daly, Ware, and Murphy, unpacking their varied backgrounds, how they earned their Medals of Honor — and many more decorations besides — and what their lives were like after the war. We end our conversation with what Alex has personally taken away from the stories of these brave men.Resources Related to the PodcastThird Infantry DivisionMaurice Britt's Medal of Honor CitationMichael Daly's Medal of Honor CitationKeith Ware's Medal of Honor CitationAudie Murphy's Medal of Honor CitationAoM Article: Lessons in Manliness from Byron “Whizzer” WhiteGeneral Alexander PatchAudie Murphy's To Hell and Back — the book and filmConnect With Alex KershawAlex's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code "manliness" at checkout.

    How to Get Your Anger Under Control

    Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2022 45:33

    When you look back on the moments you regret most in your life, a fair number of them likely involved you being angry. And if these cringe-inducing, life- and relationship-damaging moments happen more often than you'd like, then it's time to start thinking about how to get a handle on your anger.My guest today offers help in that process. His name is Dr. Chip Tafrate, and he's a clinical psychologist, a professor of criminology and criminal justice, and the co-author, along with Howard Kassinove, of Anger Management for Everyone: Ten Proven Strategies to Help You Control Anger and Live a Happier Life. Chip walks us through what anger is, how it's distinctive from aggression, and how it can be both destructive and healthy. We then get into some of the strategies Chip recommends for managing your anger so it stays in that latter zone, including making changes to your lifestyle, avoiding anger-inducing triggers, reframing your thoughts, and doing anger exposure therapy.Resources Related to the PodcastAnger Management for Any Situation — Chip and Howard's Udemy courseAoM podcast #614 with Steven Hayes on Acceptance and Commitment TherapyAoM Podcast #489: How to Get a Handle on Your AngerAoM Article: How Reframing Builds ResilienceAoM Article: The Virtuous Life — TranquilityConnect With Dr. Chip TafrateChip's faculty page at CCSUListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code "manliness" at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.

    Genius, Courage, and Betrayal in the Search for the Source of the Nile

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2022 44:14

    In the 19th century, the source of the Nile River remained one of the greatest mysteries of geographic exploration. The story of how the British eventually found it is one of adventure, danger, and bravery, but also arrogance, envy, and resentment.Here to offer some snapshots from this dramatic expedition is Candice Millard, author of River of the Gods: Genius, Courage, and Betrayal in the Search for the Source of the Nile. Today on the show, Candice shares how two men who were very much opposites, Richard Francis Burton and John Hanning Speke, ventured together on two years-long expeditions to locate the source of the longest and most legendary river in the world, the harrowing obstacles they faced in their quest, and how their partnership devolved into a bitter rivalry. Along the way, we discuss what made Burton such a compelling character, why we remember his name but not Speke's, and the African guide who was the unheralded hero in the achievements of both men.Resources Related to the PodcastCandice's previous appearance on the show — #240: The Making of Winston ChurchillRichard Francis BurtonJohn Hanning SpekeSidi Mubarak BombayLake VictoriaLake TanganyikaAoM Article: Lessons From Richard Francis BurtonAoM Article: An Intro to EnvyConnect With Candice MillardCandice's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code "manliness" at checkout.

    How Your Expectations Can Change Your Life

    Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2022 50:26

    During World War II, Henry Beecher, an anesthesiologist serving in the U.S. Army, noticed that 32% of the soldiers he treated for horrific battle wounds felt no pain. A further 44% experienced only slight or mild discomfort, despite the fact they had shrapnel embedded in their bodies. Beecher hypothesized that the euphoria of surviving battle resulted in the release of a natural painkiller. When morphine was running low in Europe, Beecher thought he could harness the mind's seeming ability to produce natural painkillers in a different way by injecting soldiers who were about to undergo surgery with a simple saline solution, while telling the soldiers they were receiving morphine. About 90% of these patients underwent the surgery with little or no pain.Beecher's field-expedient placebo treatments would go on to open up decades of research into the power of our expectations. On today's show, my guest will walk us through that fascinating research, and how the connection between the body and the mind is a lot stronger and wilder than we know.His name is David Robson and he's an award-winning science writer and the author of The Expectation Effect: How Your Mindset Can Change Your World. David and I begin our conversation with how and why the brain operates as a prediction machine, and how the expectations it generates can shape the reality we experience. We then discuss how even when someone's pain or condition is very real, the placebo effect can have an equally real effect on their physiology — even when people know they're taking a placebo. We also get into the “nocebo effect,” where your expectation that a drug will have negative side effects, in fact produces those side effects. From there we turn to how the expectation effect has powerful results beyond the medical world, and shows up in the areas of sleep, diet, and fitness, including how thinking of doing chores as exercise actually increases the health benefits of that activity, how reframing your anxiety can turn it into a performance-enhancing boost, and how your perception of getting older hugely affects how you will actually physically and mentally age.Resources Related to the PodcastSome of the studies mentioned in the show:Open-label placebo treatment in chronic low back painConditioning open-label placebo: a pilot pharmacobehavioral approach for opioid dose reduction and pain controlMind-set matters: exercise and the placebo effectLongevity increased by positive self-perceptions of agingAoM Podcast #661: Get Better Sleep by Stressing About It LessAoM Article: Reframe for ResilienceConnect With David RobsonDavid's WebsiteDavid on Twitter

    An Old-School Boxing Trainer on What It Means to Be a Man

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2022 55:44

    Teddy Atlas was born to a well-respected doctor in a wealthy part of Staten Island. Most kids like him end up going to an Ivy League school to become some sort of white collar professional. Teddy? Teddy dropped out of high school, went to jail, and ended up becoming a trainer to 18 world champion boxers, including heavyweight champion Michael Moore, who defeated Evander Holyfield for the title in 1994.Today on the show I talk to Teddy about how and why he took the path he did in life. Teddy explains how he ended up boxing under legendary trainer Cus D'Amato, and how Cus guided Teddy towards becoming a trainer himself. Teddy then shares stories of training kids in the Catskills, taking them to unsanctioned amateur fights in the Bronx, and the lessons he learned from boxing and his father about personal responsibility, managing fear, overcoming resistance, and what it means to be a man.Resources/People/Articles Mentioned in PodcastTeddy's book, AtlasOn Taking a PunchCus D'AmatoKevin RooneyThe 14 Best Boxing MoviesA Manly History of the Sweet ScienceRocky Marciano's Fight for Perfection In a Crooked WorldA Man's Search for Meaning Inside the RingAoM's Boxing for Beginners seriesAoM's Boxing BasicsThe Power of MentoringThe Rise and Fall of the American Heavyweight Boxer

    Stress-Free Small Talk

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2022 41:16

    If making small talk makes someone anxious, it may just be because they have a fear of such interactions, and my guest today, Rich Gallagher, can help them overcome it through his practice as a therapist. Or, someone's anxiety around small talk can be based in part on simply not knowing how to do it, and in that case, Rich helps them by teaching them the mechanics of conversation, which he shares in his book Stress-Free Small Talk, as well as on today's show.Rich and I begin our conversation with how small talk is important as an on-ramp to bigger things, how it's a skill that can be developed like any other, and how learning its mechanics can dampen the anxiety you feel about taking part in it. We then turn to these mechanics of making comfortable and effective small talk, including doing prep work, embracing tried-and-true openers, and avoiding talking too much yourself. We also discuss how to join conversations that are already underway, manage committing a faux pas, acknowledge others to build connection, and end a conversation gracefully. We end our conversation with small talk strategies for first dates and job interviews, and what to do when you go to a party where you only know the host.Resources Related to the PodcastRelated AoM articles on small talk/social skills:How to Make Small TalkSeries on overcoming shynessYour 4 Social GiftsHow to Enter a Room Like a BossWhat to Do at an Event Where You Don't Know AnyoneHow to Think of Questions to Ask PeopleHow to Use Body Language to Create a Dynamite First ImpressionHow to End a ConversationHow to Make a Great Last ImpressionHow to Recover from a Bad First ImpressionHow to Ask Better Questions on a First DateHow to Give a ComplimentSunday Firesides: Want to Solve Your Social Problems? Get Over Your SelfRelated AoM podcasts on small talk:#317: Why Your First Impression Matters & How to Improve It#406: Why You Need to Embrace Small TalkThe Rotary's 4-Way Test

    The Cold Water Swim Cure

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2022 44:51

    Have you ever driven along the coastline, or walked by a local pond or lake and thought about taking a dip, but felt hesitant about swimming in what you know is cold water? My guest today, who argues that cold water swimming is one of the very best things you can do for your mental and physical health, will inspire you to finally take the plunge.His name is Dr. Mark Harper and he's an anesthesiologist and the author of Chill: The Cold Water Swim Cure. We begin our conversation with how Mark's research into the prevention of hypothermia during surgery led him to investigate the benefits of cold water exposure in managing the body's overall stress response. We discuss the effect cold water has on the body, and the potential mental and physical benefits this effect can have, from reducing inflammation, to reducing depression caused by inflammation, to improving conditions from diabetes to migraines. We get into how long you need to be in the water to get these benefits, and the temperature the water needs to be, which may not be as cold as you think, and potentially makes, depending on where you live, cold water swimming viable as a year-round practice. Mark also explains how to get started with cold water swimming, and do it safely and effectively, including why you should start in the summer, and how best to prepare your body before you get in the water and recover after you get out of it. We end our conversation with whether or not you can get the same benefits of cold water swimming from taking an ice bath or cold shower.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: Semper Virilis — A Roadmap to Manhood in the 21st CenturyAoM Podcast #585: Inflammation, Saunas, and the New Science of DepressionPodcast #275: How Your Climate-Controlled Comfort Is Killing YouOn Airs, Waters, and Places by HippocratesRichard RussellJill Bolte Taylor's TED talkMike Tipton's researchBBC documentary, The Doctor Who Gave Up DrugsAoM article on the benefits of cold showersOrganizations Mark works with that promote cold water swimming:Mental Health SwimsChillSeaSure

    The 5 Allies Every Man Needs

    Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2022 45:51

    When it comes to improving our lives and reaching our goals, we often think of changing our personal habits and routines. We think about ourselves, but don't look outside ourselves. But my guest would say that if we really want to change and make progress, we also need to surround ourselves with positive, strengthening people, and in particular, five types of “allies of glory” who can truly help us be our best.His name is Antonio Neves and he's an author, speaker, podcaster, and success coach. Today on the show, Antonio and I discuss the importance of relationships in moving us forward in our personal and career goals, the difference between allies who facilitate that progress and the thieves who hinder it, and how to minimize the influence that the latter have on us. We then get into the five kinds of allies Antonio says we need in our lives, and he unpacks what each of these allies offers. We end our conversation with Antonio's advice for how to find these allies and expand your social and professional networks.Resources Related to the PodcastAntonio's previous appearance on the podcast: #676 — Stop Living on Autopilot and Take Responsibility for Your LifeSunday Firesides: Relationships Over WillpowerAoM Article: How to Cut Toxic People Out of Your LifeAoM Podcast #559: How to Handle Difficult ConversationsAoM Podcast #403: A Better Way to NetworkAoM Article: The Cabinet of Invisible CounselorsConnect With Antonio NevesAntonio's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)Listen to the episode on a separate page.Download this episode.Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.Listen ad-free on Stitcher Premium; get a free month when you use code “manliness” at checkout.Podcast SponsorsClick here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.Transcript Coming Soon  

    Getting Along Is Overrated

    Play Episode Listen Later May 2, 2022 42:41

    A lot of people really dislike conflict and have a low opinion of it. They're uncomfortable with disagreements at the office, think there's no room for contention at church, worry that fighting with their partner means their relationship is destined to dissolve, and generally feel that heated arguments tear communities apart.My guest today, Ian Leslie, used to be one of these conflict-averse people. But as he discovered in researching his new book, Conflicted: How Productive Disagreements Lead to Better Outcomes, conflict not only brings us together, the lack of it, he says, just plain makes us stupider. Today on the show, Ian and I discuss why people get the idea that conflict is unproductive from watching online arguments and why these flame wars aren't actually indicative of the value of arguing offline. We then delve into this surprising value, from the way conflict makes us smarter, to how couples who have heated arguments are actually happier. Ian unpacks some of the myths around difficult conversations, such as the idea that they have to be done in a strictly rational and unemotional way to be fruitful, and he offers ways to approach conflict that will make it more productive, especially remembering to always prioritize the relationship above all.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: The Rationality of EmotionsAoM Podcast #559: How to Handle Difficult ConversationsPodcast #648: Lessons in Building Rapport from Experts in Terrorist Interrogation (With Laurence Alison)reddit — Change My ViewConnect with Kevin MaurerIan's WebsiteIan on Twitter

    What It Was Like to Be a B-17 Pilot During WWII

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2022 40:49

    “We were young citizen-soldiers, terribly naive and gullible about what we would be confronted with in the air war over Europe and the profound effect it would have upon every fiber of our being for the rest of our lives. We were all afraid, but it was beyond our power to quit. We volunteered for the service and, once trained and overseas, felt we had no choice but to fulfill the mission assigned. My hope is that this book honors the men with whom I served by telling the truth about what it took to climb into the cold blue and fight for our lives over and over again.”So writes the 100-year-old World War II veteran John “Lucky” Luckadoo in the new book he co-authored with Kevin Maurer: Damn Lucky: One Man's Courage During the Bloodiest Military Campaign in Aviation History. Kevin is my guest today, and will share Lucky's story, and with it, the story of WWII's famous B-17 bomber.During the war, airmen in the 100th Bomb Group could finish their combat service and return home after flying 25 missions. Yet with a 1 in 10 chance of becoming a casualty, few were able to reach this milestone. Lucky was one of the, well, lucky few who did, and Kevin traces how he got there, from trying to join the Royal Canadian Air Force as a teenager, to learning to fly the B-17 on the job, to his harrowing daylight bombing missions over Germany, to the life he made for himself after the war. Along the way, Kevin describes the brutal conditions inside a B-17 and the bomber's role in winning the war.Resources Related to the PodcastThe Bomber Mafia by Malcolm GladwellMemphis BelleNorden bombsightVideo tour of B-17 G modelConnect with Kevin MaurerKevin's Website

    Overcome the Decision Traps Around Diet and Exercise

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2022 43:48

    When it comes to making behavior change around diet and exercise, it's no secret that many people fail in their efforts. My guest would say that's because too often we only concentrate on the things that drive us towards that change — whether willpower, or motivation, or the rewards that turn behaviors into habits — and that we need to think more about the obstacles keeping us from making the decisions we desire.Her name is Michelle Segar and she's a behavioral science researcher and health coach, as well as the author of The Joy Choice: How to Finally Achieve Lasting Changes in Eating and Exercise. Today on the show, Michelle explains why exercise and eating aren't conducive to becoming habits — at least of the automatic variety — and why it's more helpful to think of these behaviors in terms of "life space" and "choice points." She makes the case for why we shouldn't just focus on what drives behaviors, but also understand what disrupts them, and unpacks four of these disruptors: temptation, rebellion, accommodation, and perfection. Michelle then offers a three-step decision tool for dealing with these disruptors, and explains how to develop the flexibility to choose the perfect imperfect option that keeps you consistent and even celebrate and enjoy the decision to do something instead of nothing.Resources Related to the PodcastMichelle's previous appearance on the show — Podcast #575: Counterintuitive Advice on Making Exercise a Sustainable HabitAoM Article: How I Finally Made Flossing a HabitAoM Podcast #782: Anxiety Is a Habit — Here's How to Break It (With Judson Brewer)Kurt LewinFreakonomics episode that includes Daniel Kahneman referencing LewinGrounded cognitionAffective–Reflective Theory of physical inactivity and exerciseConnect With Michelle SegarMichelle's Website

    The Life We're Looking For

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2022 56:01

    In the quiet moments of our lives, we can all sense that our hearts long for something, though we often don't know what that something is. We seek an answer in our phones, and while they can provide some sense of extension and fulfillment — a feeling of magic — the use of technology also comes with significant costs in individual development and interpersonal connection that we typically don't fully understand and consider.My guest today will unpack what it is we really yearn for, how technology, when misused, can direct us away from the path to fulfilling those yearnings, and how we can find true human flourishing in a world in which so much works against it. His name is Andy Crouch and he's the author of The Life We're Looking For: Reclaiming Relationship in a Technological World. Today on the show we talk about the tradeoffs you make when you seek magic without mastery, and how we can understand our desires better once we understand ourselves as heart, soul, mind, and strength complexes who want to be loved and known. We discuss the difference between interactions that are personal versus personalized, as well as the difference between devices and instruments, and how to use your phone as the latter instead of the former. We end our conversation with why Andy thinks we need to redesign the architecture of our relational lives and create something he calls “households.”Resources Related to the PodcastFaust by Johann Wolfgang von GoetheWendell BerryAoM article on Plato's idea of the tripartite nature of the soulAoM Podcast #723: Men Without ChestsAoM Article: The Tool Works on Both EndsAoM Article: Communities vs. Networks — To Which Do You Belong?Connect With Andy CrouchAndy's WebsitePraxis Labs

    The U-Shaped Curve of Happiness

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2022 32:21

    If you're someone who's a decade or two out from your high school graduation, do you ever find yourself thinking that you're just not as happy as you were back then? Of course all the positive-thinking self-talk then kicks in and you think, "Well, maybe I actually wasn't that happy before. I do like my life better now. I like the independence I have. Yeah, yeah, I really like being an adult." Yet, no matter the glass-half-full glow you try to put on things, you can't shake the feeling that your happiness has declined over the years, that at 30, you weren't as happy as you were at 20, and that at 40, you weren't as happy as you were when you were 30.Well, that feeling is more than a nostalgic hunch, and it's not unique to you. It's actually been born out by hundreds of research papers and studies and shown to be a near-universal experience. My guest today has authored many of those papers. His name is Dr. David Branchflower and he's a labor economist who not only studies the data around money and jobs, but also around human happiness. Today on the show David explains how happiness follows a U-shaped curve, and starts declining around age 18, and continues to fall into midlife, before picking back up again, and David shares the average age at which happiness hits its very lowest point. While it's not entirely clear why the U-shape of happiness occurs, we talk about some possible reasons behind it. And while the U-shape is consistent across the world, it can be lower or higher, and so we discuss how factors like gender, socio-economic and martial status, and having children affect happiness, and whether it's possible to mitigate the dip.While the fact that it won't be until your mid-60s that you feel as happy as you were at age 18 might seem depressing, David argues that it's comforting to know that the feelings of declining happiness you experience at you approach midlife are normal, and will not only pass one day, but start moving in the other direction.Resources Related to the Podcast"Is Happiness U-Shaped Everywhere?" — one of the main research papers on the happiness curve that David has authoredDavid's book Not Working: Where Have All the Good Jobs Gone?Deaths of Despair and the Future of Capitalism by Anne Case and Angus DeatonStudy on great apes having a midlife crisisAoM Series: The Seasons of a Man's LifeAoM Podcast #776: How to Shift Out of the Midlife MalaiseAoM Article: The Economics of HappinessConnect With David BranchflowerDavid's Faculty Page at Dartmouth (includes links to his research)

    The Rise, Fall, and Redemption of Johnny Cash

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2022 40:05

    Johnny Cash, “The Man in Black,” said he wore all black on behalf of the poor and hungry, the old who were neglected, “the “prisoner who has long paid for his crime,” and those betrayed by drugs. As a man who had grown up dirt poor, struggled his whole life with addiction, was thrown in jail seven times, and found himself in the proverbial wilderness during a long stretch of his career, Cash had a real heart for these kinds of folks; he was a man who had lived numerous ups and downs himself.Marshall Terrill, co-author of Johnny Cash: The Redemption of an American Icon, will take us through these biographical peaks and valleys today. We talk about Cash's hardscrabble upbringing on a cotton farm, his unfulfilled desire to please his father, and how his rise into stardom was accompanied by the arrival of a set of personal demons. We also discuss how, after becoming the top entertainer in the world, Cash's career slid into two decades of music industry irrelevance, the big comeback he made near the end of his life, and the faith that sustained him through all his struggles and triumphs.Resources Related to the PodcastMarshall's previous appearance on the show: Episode #673 — The Complex Coolness of Steve McQueenCash songs mentioned in the show:“Walk the Line”“Boy Named Sue”“One Piece at a Time”“Chicken in Black”“Hurt”“The Wanderer” (song Cash did with U2)Man in White — novel Cash wrote about the Apostle PaulWalk the Line movieConnect With Marshall TerrillMarshall's Page at ASU

    The New Science of Metabolism and Weight Loss

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2022 49:24

    You hear a lot about metabolism. You probably know it has something to do with weight loss. And even if you don't go in for those supposed hacks around speeding up your metabolism, you likely figure you can at least increase it by exercising more.This isn't actually the case, and my guest will sort through this and other misconceptions around metabolism on today's show. His name is Dr. Herman Pontzer and he's a professor of evolutionary anthropology and the author of Burn: New Research Blows the Lid Off How We Really Burn Calories, Lose Weight, and Stay Healthy. We begin our conversation with an overview of how metabolism powers everything your body does from thinking to moving to simply existing, and how it uses the food you eat as the energy needed to fuel these processes. We then get into Herman's field research which shows that increasing your physical activity doesn't actually increase the number of calories you burn, but why it's still hugely important to exercise anyway. He also unpacks whether certain kinds of foods are better for your metabolism, offers his recommendations on how to use diet to lose weight, and answers the common question as to whether it's true that your metabolism goes down as you age.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #691: What You Can (Really) Learn About Exercise from Your Human AncestorsAoM Podcast #552: How to Optimize Your MetabolismAoM Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off ForeverAoM Podcast #636: Why You Overeat and What to Do About ItNYT article on what happened to the metabolisms of Biggest Loser contestants after the showAoM Article: An Argument for Making Exercise (Not Diet) the Foundation of Weight ManagementConnect With Herman PontzerHerman on TwitterHerman's faculty page and lab at Duke

    How Power Corrupts

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2022 52:55

    Why do corrupt people end up in power?By way of an answer, you probably think of that famous quote from Lord Acton, "Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely." But my guest today, Brian Klaas, would say that's only one part of what leads to corrupt individuals and cultures, the other being that people who are already corrupt are more likely to seek power in the first place. Brian argues that if we ever hope to develop better systems, from our national governments to our office hierarchies, we have to work on both prongs of this dynamic, not only preventing people who gain power from going bad, but encouraging good people to seek power as well.Brian is the author of Corruptible: Who Gets Power and How It Changes Us, and today on the show, he and I discuss how people who possess the so-called "dark triad" of traits are more attracted to positions of power, how the framing around those positions can either amplify or alter this self-selection effect, and what a tyrannical homeowners' association president and a psychopathic school janitor show us about these dynamics. We also discuss why power does indeed corrupt people and can in fact change their very brain chemistry. Brian explains the importance of accountability in keeping a system clean, and how you can serve in positions of power without becoming corrupted yourself.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #108: The Upside of Your Dark SideAoM Podcast #769: The New Science of NarcissismMichael Nader's study on social status in monkeysM.G. Marmot's Whitehall II study on social status and mortalityAoM series on statusUltrasociety by Peter TurchinConnect With Brian KlassBrian's WebsiteBrian's podcast, Power Corrupts

    Set Your Kids Up for a Lifetime of Healthy Sleep

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 4, 2022 53:21

    When neurologist and sleep specialist Dr. Chris Winter sees adult patients in his sleep clinic, they often come to him because of a struggle with insomnia, which, as he described in a previous appearance on the AoM podcast, is caused by stressing too much about sleep, so that going to bed becomes an anxious and fear-inducing routine that sabotages the natural needs and rhythms of the sleep cycle.Chris would see fewer adult patients like this if, when they were kids, their parents set them up to have a healthy relationship with sleep.How to establish that kind of healthy relationship is something Chris writes about in his latest book, The Rested Child, and is the topic of our conversation today. Chris will take us through what parents should know about their kids' sleep from the womb through young adulthood, with tips on both how to improve your children's sleep, and how to avoid messing it up, including his take on co-sleeping, why he let his kids go to bed whenever they wanted, and why he discourages giving children melatonin to help them sleep.Resources Related to the PodcastChris' last appearance on the show — episode #661: Get Better Sleep By Stressing About It LessNational Sleep Foundation's graph and write-up of sleep duration recommendations across the lifespanConnect With Dr. Chris WinterChris on InstagramChris on Twitter

    Kierkegaard on the Present (Passionless) Age

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2022 59:59

    Do you ever feel like the time we live in feels flat, complacent, timid, conformist, populated by people who are focused on playing it safe and are inwardly empty?A century and a half ago, the Danish philosopher Soren Kierkegaard felt the same way about the period in which he lived, and posited that there are two kinds of ages: the revolutionary, decisive, and passionate, and the sensible, rational, and reflective.Here to unpack Kierkegaard's ideas on these two kinds of ages is Jacob Howland, retired professor of philosophy and author of Kierkegaard and Socrates. Today on the show, Jacob and I first discuss some background on Kierkegaard and his existential philosophy. We then get into the differences between an age of passion and an age of reflection. We discuss how in a passionate age, an individual stands as an individual, possesses an energy which focuses on truth and ideals, and has the courage to take bold leaps of faith, while in a reflective age, the individual is subsumed by the crowd, is afraid of public opinion, and gets so lost in analysis and abstraction that he never makes a decisive move. All along the way, we delve into how Kierkegaard's description of his age parallels our own, and Kierkegaard's evergreen call to be an individual, embrace risk, and own your opinions and actions.Resources Related to the PodcastWorks by Kierkegaard mentioned in the show:Two Ages: A Literary ReviewEither/OrFear and TremblingThe Sickness Unto DeathPhilosophical FragmentsConcluding Unscientific Postscript on Philosophical FragmentsThomasine Christine Gyllembourg-EhrensvärdGeorg Wilhelm Friedrich HegelOn the Advantage and Disadvantage of History for Life by Friedrich Nietzsche “Yes, Sabermetrics Ruined Baseball”AoM Article: Your Three Selves and How Not to Fall Into DespairAoM Article: An Intro to EnvyAoM Podcast #635: The Existentialist's Survival GuideConnect With Jacob HowlandJacob's Website

    Become a Backyard Adventurer

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2022 42:18

    A lot of people feel like they've seen and done everything there is to see and do in their local area. They're bored of their daily routine, and contemplate going off on some grand adventure in a exotic locale.My guest would say that you don't actually have to wait until your next big trip nor go far afield to mix things up, and that adventure can be found right where you are, in your ordinary routines, the everyday landscape of your life, and even DIY projects, if you decide to approach them in a different way.His name is Beau Miles and he's an Australian filmmaker who documents his own small-scale adventures on YouTube, as well as the author of The Backyard Adventurer. Today on the show, Beau shares his experiments in proving anything can be infused with the challenge, intrigue, and fun which mark adventure, if you add in some intentional risk, difficulty, and simple what-the-heck quirkiness. He tells us about some of the close-to-home adventures he's executed, including walking and kayaking his 90-kilometer commute to work, reconnecting an old, long closed-down rail line by running its often hidden, overgrown path with a shovel in his hand, and making a paddle with scavenged wood. We then talk about how he created a gastronomical adventure for himself by eating his body weight in beans, and even turned tackling his to-do list into an adventure by pairing the crossing off of its entries with running a marathon in 24 hours. Along the way, Beau shares how backyard adventures help you better get to know your local area, how he deals with the police who sometimes check in on what he's up to, and how the next time you get some odd idea, you ought to just go for it, mate.Resources Related to the PodcastBeau's films/adventures mentioned in the show:Walking to WorkPaddling to WorkJunk PaddleHuman BeanRun the LineMile an HourAoM Article: My 8-Week Microadventure ChallengeAoM Podcast #120: Microadventures With Alastair HumphreysAoM Podcast #560: The Magic of WalkingTortilla Flat by John SteinbeckConnect With Beau MilesBeau's WebsiteBeau on YouTubeBeau on Instagram

    The Dangers of "Concept Creep"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2022 39:39

    Trauma. Violence. Bullying. Addiction. The range of things that these words encompass has expanded over time, and while my guest today would say that changes in how language is used are natural and inevitable, he also argues that the way we use words matters and has consequences, and that we need to better grapple with what those consequences are.His name is Dr. Nick Haslam and he's a professor of psychology at the University of Melbourne who has studied a phenomenon he calls "concept creep," which refers to the tendency of concepts having to do with harm — from trauma to depression — to broaden their meaning over time. Nick describes how concept creep happens in two ways — vertical and horizontal — and occurs both amongst clinicians and the general public. He explains what he thinks is behind concept creep, and how the way we talk about harm-related concepts changes how people experience themselves and life, bringing new kinds of identities and new kinds of people into existence. Nick argues that while there are upsides to concept creep, it also carries potential dangers that can negatively impact our lives.Resources Related to the PodcastNick's ResearchGate page"Harm Inflation: Making Sense of Concept Creep""How Americans Became So Sensitive to Harm" — Atlantic article about Nick's workThe Loss of Sadness by Allan Horwitz and Jerome Wakefield"Making Up People" by Ian HackingConnect With Nick HaslamNick's Faculty Page

    Run Like a Pro (Even If You're Slow)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2022 47:55

    Running is a gloriously democratic and accessible sport. All you need is a pair of shoes and the will to start moving your legs. It's so seemingly simple, that you may never think to figure out how you might get better at it — you just follow what your peers may be doing (who may not know anything more than you do), or pick up tips that percolate through social media (which may not be accurate), or 100% wing it, just vaguely trying to get a little faster each time you run.My guest says that, rather than taking a willy-nilly approach to your recreational running, you can greatly improve your performance by learning from the professionals who actually run for a living.His name is Matt Fitzgerald and he's a sports writer, a running coach, and the co-author of Run Like a Pro (Even If You're Slow): Elite Tools and Tips for Runners at Every Level. Today on the show Matt translates the best practices of elite runners into tactics the amateur can incorporate into their training, beginning with why you need to follow a well-programmed running plan, how to find the sweet spot for your running volume — including why you actually should concentrate more on the amount of time you run rather than the miles — and the number of hours Matt recommends trying to work up to running each week if you'd like to really see what you can do as a runner. We then discuss the ratio of low intensity to high intensity workouts you should be doing, the surprisingly small emphasis pros put on running form, what the pros know about what works best for recovery, and the edge you can get through cross-training. We end our conversation with the difference in mindset that marks elite runners, including how they're probably better quitters than you are.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #202: Matt's previous appearance on the show to talk about How Bad Do You Want It?Ventilatory thresholdBen Rosario, co-author of Run Like a Pro (Even If You're Slow)AoM Podcast #266: The Myths and Truths of Distance RunningAoM Podcast #382: How to Lift More, Run Faster, and Endure LongerAoM Article: Beginner's Guide to Long-Distance RunningAoM Article: Bulletproof Ways to Prevent Running InjuriesConnect With Matt FitzgeraldMatt's personal websiteMatt's business website: 80/20 Endurance

    The Writing Life of Ernest Hemingway

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2022 50:10

    How did one of history's greatest writers — Ernest Hemingway — get going with his craft, develop his indelible style, and infuse his narratives with memorable life and compelling tension?Today we delve into the answers to those questions with Hemingway scholar Mark Cirino, who is a professor of English, the editor and author of half a dozen books on Hemingway — including Ernest Hemingway: Thought in Action — and the host of the One True Podcast which covers all things related to Papa. Mark and I our begin our conversation with how Hemingway cut his teeth with writing as a journalist, how the "iceberg theory" underlay his approach to writing as a novelist, and how his years in Paris — and the books, people, and art he encountered there — influenced his work and the trajectory of his career. We then discuss how his travel and recreational pastimes allowed him to write with a vivid firsthand understanding of certain places and pursuits, what his writing routine was like, and how the characters in his novels explore the tension between thought and action. We end our conversation with Mark's recommendation for where to start reading Hemingway if you've never read him or haven't read him in a long time, and what Mark thinks was Hemingway's "one true sentence."Resources Related to the PodcastHemingway works mentioned in the show:"Big Two-Hearted River""Soldier's Home""Hills Like White Elephants""Killers""Indian Camp""The Snows of Kilimanjaro"In Our TimeDeath in the AfternoonA Moveable FeastThe Sun Also RisesAcross the River and Into the TreesFor Whom the Bell TollsThe Old Man and the SeaA Farewell to ArmsMen at War (edited by Hemingway)Shakespeare and Company lending cards for HemingwayErnest Hemingway: A Life Story by Carlos BakerHemingway's Brain by Andrew FarahAoM Article: Why Ernest Hemingway Committed SuicideAoM Article: The Libraries of Famous Men — Ernest HemingwayAoM Article: Ernest Hemingway as a Case Study in Living a T-Shaped LifeConnect With Mark CirinoOne True PodcastOne True Podcast on Twitter

    The Dreams That Precede Death

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 14, 2022 38:55

    As the dying approach their death, up to 88% of them experience certain vivid, moving dreams — though "dreams" isn't even the best word for these experiences, as they can happen to people when they're both awake and asleep, and are described by them as being "more real than real."My guest today has studied these visions and dreams for many years and thinks they have important insights into the nature of life and death. His name is Dr. Chrisopther Kerr, and he's a hospice physician and end-of-life researcher, as well as the author of Death Is But a Dream: Finding Hope and Meaning at Life's End. We begin our conversation with Dr. Kerr's efforts to study end-of-life experiences on an objective, scientific basis, and how his research into these visions and dreams doesn't attempt to find their spiritual or paranormal origin, but simply seeks to catalog the phenomenon from a clinical perspective. We then discuss how long before death people begin having these dreams, the content of the dreams, and who shows up in them. Dr. Kerr describes how pre-death visions and dreams are typically positive and comforting, and how even the rarer, disturbing variety can end up being transformative. And he shares what these dreams do not only for the dying, but for their caregivers as well.Resources Related to the PodcastDr. Kerr's Tedx TalkDeath Is But a Dream PBS documentaryNetflix docuseries Surviving Death (Dr. Kerr is featured on the 5th episode)AoM Podcast #171: The Dying Experience — Myths and AnswersConnect With Dr. KerrDr. Kerr's Website

    The Secrets to Making the Perfect Pizza

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2022 39:16

    Pizza. It's ubiquitous. It's a fixture at parties and office break rooms, and there's a good chance you order it from your favorite place for dinner every single week.But there's one setting where pizza doesn't show up very often, and that's in your own oven, having been made in your own kitchen. But my guest today, who's spent decades pursuing the perfect pizza, says you ought to be making your own pies more often and will teach you the secrets to getting restaurant-quality pizza at home. His name is Dan Richer, and he's the owner and chef of Razza in New Jersey, as well as the author of The Joy of Pizza: Everything You Need to Know.We begin our conversation with what makes pizza such an awesome, go-to, inexhaustibly delicious dish and how to overcome the obstacles that typically prevent people from creating pizzeria-level pizza at home. Dan then gives us his recommendations on sauce, cheese, and toppings in order to create the perfect pizza pie, including his take on that most burning of questions: does pineapple belong on a pizza?Connect With Dan RicherJoy of Pizza WebsiteDan on InstagramWebsite for Dan's Razza restaurant 

    How Eisenhower Led — A Conversation with Ike's Granddaughter

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2022 62:49

    Editor's Note: This is a rebroadcast. It originally aired in September 2020.From guiding the Allies to victory in World War II as supreme commander, to steering the ship of state for eight years as one of the country's least partisan and most popular presidents, few leaders in history have had to make as varied and consequential decisions as Dwight D. Eisenhower.My guest today possesses insights into how he made the many choices he was faced with in his military and political careers that are gleaned not only from studying Ike's life, but from personally knowing the man beneath the mantle. Her name is Susan Eisenhower and she's a writer, consultant, and policy strategist, one of Dwight's four grandchildren, and the author of the new book How Ike Led: The Principles Behind Eisenhower's Biggest Decisions. Susan and I begin our conversation with her relationship with Ike as both historic leader and ordinary grandfather, and why she decided to write a book about his leadership style. We then dive into the principles of his leadership, beginning with his decision to greenlight the D-Day invasion, what it reveals about his iron-clad commitment to taking responsibility, and how that commitment allowed him to be such an effective delegator. From there Susan explains how a love of studying history born in Ike's boyhood allowed him to take a big picture approach to strategy, how he used a desk drawer to deal with his lifelong struggle with anger, and how his belief in morale as an input rather than an output inspired him to always stay optimistic for the benefit of those he led. We then turn to how Eisenhower dealt with the discovery of concentration camps at the end of WWII and making peace with Germany after it. We then talk about his nonpartisan governing style as president which he called the "Middle Way" and which involved emphasizing cooperation, compromise, and unity, including members of both political parties in his cabinet, limiting his use of the "bully pulpit" to sway public opinion, and striving not to turn policy issues into personality confrontations. We then discuss how this style influenced how he dealt with Joseph McCarthy and enforced the Brown v. Board of Education decision. At the end of our conversation, Susan explains that while she doesn't expect everyone to agree with the difficult decisions her grandfather made, she thinks there's something to be learned from how he managed to make them, and to make them without becoming hard and cynical in the process.

    Developing Your Personal Uniform

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2022 51:33

    The personal uniform is a look that you've settled on as your regular get-up. Today on the show I talk to two style writers, David Coggins and Michael Williams, about all things concerning this stylish-yet-bandwidth-saving approach to dressing. We discuss what a personal uniform is, how to develop one and why that development comes with age, and how to find inspiration for yours. We also talk about establishing the base pieces of your personal uniform, buying multiples of its fundamental components, and refining your look over time.Resources Related to the PodcastPhoto of David and Michael at the MastersAoM Podcast #398: Should a Man Care About How He Dresses?AoM article on tailoringAoM Article: 10 Things Your Father Should Have Taught You About StyleAoM Article: 3 Steps to Building Your Individual StyleSid MashburnDrake'sA guide to the Barbour coatCrockett & JonesThe chore coatUniqloDie, Workwear!Nick WoosterWilliam Brown ProjectDavid Coggins' previous appearances on the podcast:#282: How a Man Develops His Sense of Style#422: Men and Manners#706: The (Non-Cliche) Life Lessons of Fly FishingConnect With David and MichaelDavid's site The Contender and The Contender newsletterMichael's site A Continuous Lean and the ACL newsletterYou can access their podcast, Central Division, by subscribing to either of their newsletters

    Anxiety Is a Habit — Here's How to Break It

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2022 37:45

    You may think of anxiety as a reaction, a feeling, or a disorder. My guest today says that perhaps the best way to think about anxiety, especially if you want to treat it effectively, is as a habit.His name is Dr. Judson Brewer, and he's a psychiatrist and neuroscientist, and the author of Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind. Dr. Jud and I begin our conversation with what anxiety is, and how it gets connected into a habit loop that can lead to other maladaptive behaviors like drinking, overeating, and worrying. Dr. Jud then explains how to hack the anxiety habit loop by mapping it out, disenchanting your anxiety-driven behaviors, and giving your brain "a bigger, better offer" by getting curious about your anxiety. We also talk about why asking why you're anxious is not part of this process, and end our conversation with how this habit-based approach to behavior change can also work for things like depression and anger.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #497: The Meaning, Manifestations, and Treatments for AnxietyAoM Podcast #614: Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your LifeAoM article, podcast, and video on hacking the habit loopAoM article on asking "what" instead of "why"Undoing Depression by Richard O'ConnorConnect With Dr. JudDr. Jud's Website

    Beyond OODA — Developing the Orientation for Conflict and Violence

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2022 63:08

    The OODA Loop — the OODA stands for Observe, Orient, Decide, Act — is a strategic tool designed to help people make better decisions when facing any kind of competitor or opponent.My guest today says that when that opponent is a seasoned criminal, the Orient component of OODA — a person's mindset — is the most underestimated and critical part of the model to understand.His name is Varg Freeborn and he's the author of Violence of Mind: Training and Preparation for Extreme Violence, and Beyond OODA: Developing the Orientation for Deception, Conflict, and Violence. We begin with how Varg's life story has uniquely positioned him to understand the dynamics of violence from the perspectives of both the perpetrators of crime, and the would-be preventers of that crime. Varg shares how he went from being a convicted felon to a self-defense and firearms instructor who's worked with both civilians and law enforcement.We then turn to why it's so important to understand the difference between the orientation of an average person and the orientation of a violent criminal, and why, when the two collide, the latter has a real advantage over the former. We end our conversation with what you can do in terms of mindset and training to close that gap, and be better prepared to handle a violent encounter.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM article on the OODA LoopAoM Podcast #198: Turning Yourself Into a Human WeaponAoM Podcast #334: When Violence Is the AnswerAoM Podcast #688: Protection for and From HumanityAoM Podcast #513: Be Your Own BodyguardConnect With Varg FreebornVarg's Website 

    Declutter, Downsize, and Move Forward with Your Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2022 59:16

    You want to declutter. You want to downsize. You want to live more simply. So what's been holding you back from getting closer to those ideals?My guest today sorts through both the psychological and practical roadblocks that can get in the way of living more minimally, and more in the present. His name is Matt Paxton, and he's a downsizing and decluttering expert, a featured cleaner on the television show Hoarders, the host of the Emmy-nominated show Legacy List With Matt Paxton which showcases people's heirlooms and treasures, and the author of Keep the Memories, Lose the Stuff: Declutter, Downsize, and Move Forward with Your Life.We begin our conversation with how Matt got into cleaning out houses and working with hoarders, and some of the worst cases of hoarding Matt's seen. We then get into both the mindset and brass tacks tips he's learned from the most extreme cases of clutter that can be used by regular people who just want to pare down their stuff. We talk about why we can feel so attached to our possessions, and how to let them go, while still preserving your and your family's memories. Matt recommends how and where to get started with your decluttering, and offers tools, including creating a "maybe pile" and a "legacy list," for deciding what to keep and what to chuck, whether you're dealing with big items like furniture or small stuff like documents and pictures. Matt explains what to do with your stuff whether trashing, donating, upcycling, or selling, and how much you can reasonably expect to get when you do the latter (spoiler alert: it's a lot less than you think). We end our conversation with how, after you've decluttered your place, to keep it from getting clogged up again.Oh, and we also discuss where to find hidden stashes of money when you're cleaning out the house of an older person who's died.This is a really fun and interesting conversation that definitely motivated me to clean out our house.Resources Related to the PodcastWebsite for My Legacy ListHoarders television showMatt's TEDx talk on "The Unintended Result of Our Attachment to Personal Belongings"Podcast #699: The No-Nonsense Guide to Simplifying Every Aspect of Your LifeAoM article on declutteringPodcast #626: How to Declutter Your Work LifeConnect With Matt PaxtonMatt's WebsiteListen to the Podcast! (And don't forget to leave us a review!)

    The World of the Transcendentalists and the Rise of Modern Individualism

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 16, 2022 58:18

    The town of Concord, Massachusetts has been famous twice in history. First as the location of the "shot heard round the world" which kickstarted the American Revolution in the 18th century, and second, as the home of several famous writers and thinkers, including Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau, in the 19th.My guest today, professor of history Robert A. Gross, has written landmark books on both of these periods in Concord's history. The first, called The Minutemen and Their World, was published in 1976. Now, nearly 50 years later, he's published a new volume called The Transcendentalists and Their World.In both books, Bob delves into the details of everyday life in Concord in order to illuminate broader trends and forces in American culture. In the case of his second book, he does so to explore how the communal, hierarchical nature of life in America during the Revolutionary period shifted to a more autonomous and bottom-up ethos during the time of transcendentalism — a movement which prized individuality over conformity and intuition over logic, believed divinity existed in each person and throughout nature, and celebrated the authority of the individual over the authority of institutions.In today's episode, Bob and I discuss how changing forces in commerce and religion, as well as a fervent, emerging interest in self-improvement, led to this shift, and how thinkers like Emerson and Thoreau set a new course for what it means to live a life of integrity. We end our conversation with what the world of the transcendentalists has to tell us in our own time period, which, like theirs, is marked by the widespread rejection of top-down gatekeepers.Resources Related to the PodcastBob's 1976 book The Minutemen and Their WorldEzra RipleyThe Lyceum movementAoM Article: A Man's Guide to Self-RelianceAoM Podcast #324: What It Really Means to Be Self-ReliantAoM Podcast: #417: The Mystical Life of Henry David ThoreauAoM Podcast #575: A Treasure Trove of American PhilosophyAoM Article: How to REALLY Avoid Living a Life of Quiet DesperationConnect With Bob GrossBob's Faculty Page

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