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TITLE Happiness & Rewiring Your Brain Through Mindfulness & Self-Care GUEST Anne-Kathrin Walter EPISODE OVERVIEW I talk to Anne-Kathrin Walter, founder of HiSensitives. We talk about what sensitivity looks like in Europe and The Netherlands compared to the United States. Anne talks about happiness and Positive Psychology and we separate this from the act of escaping our negative feelings. We talk about how our brains want to keep us in a comfortable place and how this can potentially lead to being stuck in patterns. We talk about how to use gratitude as a tool for building a positive environment as well as other exercises we can utilize in our daily lives. HIGHLIGHTS Anne-Kathrin shares her experience with the perception of sensitivity in her home country, The Netherlands More people are coming out of their HSP closet as a result of more attention being paid to the topic We can often make the mistake of confusing our wounds with traits of being an HSP Anne-Kathrin discusses how sensitivity comes with strengths: Creativity Intuitiveness Empathy We talk about the importance of dealing with trauma in our lives Anne-Kathrin shares the benefits she has experienced through therapy, and her initial struggle with opening up to a stranger Anne-Kathrin talks about how discovering she is an HSP has offered perspective on so many aspects of her past Anne-Kathrin prefers the term ‘Highly Perceptive Person’ Anne-Kathrin explains the symbol that she created for her business HiSensitives. This symbol was so meaningful to her, that she has a tattoo of the logo she created We carefully navigate a discussion surrounding the importance of Positive Thinking and how it can be used as a tool of preparation to face our traumas, not a replacement for addressing traumatic experiences Anne-Kathrin shares the personal story of her negative spiral that lead her into what she does today with Positive Psychology Anne-Kathrin explains how negative thoughts can become patterns/safe spaces for our brains that become challenging to break away from How we can use gratitude to examine what is going well in our lives to rewire our brains away from negative spirals Depending on our background, some people need Positive Thinking and some of us need to address and honor uncomfortable feelings Anne-Kathrin shares the story of a traumatic fire that changed her life Anne-Kathrin explains guided meditation and the process of grounding Anne-Kathrin talks about using shower meditation, standing in the shower and visualizing everything that is not of positive use to you, and being cleansed of those thoughts and having them washed down the drain We discuss box breathing Anne-Kathrin encourages 21 Days of Gratitude - Reach out to 1 person a day to express something you are grateful to them for We talk about how writing down your thoughts can be a helpful exercise for letting things go We discuss the importance of surrounding ourselves with positive, supportive people We talk about Examining your daily habits, and trying to eliminate daily detractors to your mental and physical health We talk about Evaluating your daily consumption: diet, entertainment, news, social, etc. Anne-Kathrin discusses the challenges she faces as an HSP Dr. Elaine Aron suggests that HSPs get 2 hours of quiet time per day Anne-Kathrin shares her superpowers that come with being an HSP Resources Dr. Kristin Neff: https://self-compassion.org/ Christopher Germer: https://chrisgermer.com/ Shawn Achor: http://www.shawnachor.com/ Meditation Minis Podcast with Chel Hamilton https://meditationminis.com/ Brene Brown Super Soul Sunday on trust: http://www.oprah.com/own-supersoulsessions/brene-brown-what-to-do-when-you-struggle-with-trust BIO Anne-Kathrin Walter is a young, highly sensitive entrepreneur from the Netherlands. In 2018, she founded the brand HiSensitives, which is a brand for highly sensitive people that aims to increase awareness and acceptance of the trait and to connect highly sensitive people worldwide. By diving into the world of positive thinking and changing her own thought patterns, Anne-Kathrin managed to transform her life and to dare to chase her dreams. Through the right relationships, a change of direction when it comes to her career and daily self-care she managed to create a HSP-friendly life for herself. . PODCAST HOST Patricia Young is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Anne-Kathrin Walter: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/i.am.anne.kathrn/ HiSensitives Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hisensitives/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hisensitives/ Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/Hisensitives/ Website: https://hisensitives.com/ E-Mail: Contact@hisensitives.com Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
EPISODE OVERVIEW Jen and I talk about perfectionism, boundaries, self-care, HS superpowers, communication, vulnerability, authenticity, demystifying emotions, creating a lifestyle that honors the HSP, and mindfulness. These are some of the things that we notice Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) struggling with. Our primary intention is to give you an idea of what to expect in our upcoming online groups. Whether you are considering taking a group or not, this episode is a great way to identify your HS strengths and maybe see if there are areas you want to focus on. HIGHLIGHTS Jen explains why working with HSPs is a passion of hers We share our excitement about the groups and why we feel they are important I share the story of my first meeting with Jen Jen shares her initial impression upon our first meeting and the benefit that comes with creating a safe space to openly share our needs We discuss our goal of making the groups a safe space where productive communication can happen, and we create community Setting boundaries in relationships is not about changing the other person; it’s creating a space for yourself by communicating your needs We discuss the plan for our upcoming groups to give you an idea of what to expect: Group culture / Expectations Creating community guidelines Creating and maintaining a safe environment Everyone is seen and heard Everyone is treated respectfully Everyone’s goals for the group Getting to know each other Basic education about the trait Questions and discussion Building pride in HSP Applying the pride Recognizing this is a non-HSP world, and we get to assert our HSP traits/needs Identifying negative messages and turning them into superpowers Things we struggle with Too sensitive Too needy Need to get thicker skin Not social No fun, can’t take a joke, no sense of humor Too picky Overthink things Worry too much Too nice Over responsible for everything Feeling fatally flawed, not good enough Mistfit--I’m the only one; There’s no one like me Deep sense of not belonging and shame Outcomes Embracing our traits Identify and verbalize what traits resonate for us Feeling confident in what our needs are Naming our strengths Seeing comments as being about the other person Identifying when we get triggered, and having tools to manage Proper care and feeding of the HSP Skillfulness around boundaries Finding ways to live peacefully with non-HPSs and honor everyone’s needs Self-care is non-negotiable! Things we struggle with People pleasing Putting others needs ahead of our own Feeling guilty when we take care of ourselves Feeling resentful when we meet other’s needs and not our own Feeling drained Feeling depleted Feeling unappreciated Feeling overwhelmed Feeling irritable, negative, easily annoyed, less patient, more critical of self and others, intolerant Outcomes Becoming comfortable with self-centering It's ok to be the center of your universe You can’t pour from an empty cup Self-care is an imperative--which is ultimately a selfless act When we take care of ourselves, everyone benefits in the long run (not always immediately, but the overall benefit is for everyone) Listening to what we need and want Trusting what we need and want Wanting to take care of ourselves Knowing that when we take care of ourselves, we have more to offer others Feeling out of balance (or at least aware) when we are ignoring our own needs Having richer deeper relationships because we are fulfilled and coming from a place where we have more to offer Boundaries are an imperative part of self-care Things we struggle with Feeling uncomfortable with conflict Feeling guilty--picking up on other’s feelings that we might disappoint others (or they will get angry or frustrated) The guilt is not necessary (we haven’t done anything wrong--we’re supposed to set boundaries--it’s healthy, and boundaries are a natural and necessary part of any healthy relationship) Guilt is the best word we have in the English language, but it’s not really an accurate description Feeling not seen, not heard or not honored Not expressing our wants and needs Feeling resentful Feeling powerless Feeling taken advantage of Feeling like everyone else gets their needs met or what they want Outcomes Trusting our feelings Boundaries will directly reduce our overwhelm Learning how to set boundaries without emotion Boundaries make you a happy human; When we have an emotional flare, it’s because a boundary has most likely been violated (or a need has not been met) Learning how to compassionately, but kindly state what is and is not acceptable Seeing boundaries as creating safety for ourselves and others Seeing the benefits of setting limits Owning our power and KNOWING that our wants and needs are perfectly acceptable and reasonable Developing flexibility--not about the rule, but about the relationship and the context Perfectionism Things we struggle with Feeling not good enough Comparing Feeling inadequate Not starting things, paralysis Not pursuing dreams Overworking/overdoing trying to get a sense of “enoughness” Constant unease Critical of self and others Perfectionism is a myth Imposter syndrome--if people really saw who I am, they would leave Brene Brown says Whenever you have perfectionism driving, shame is riding shotgun Hustling for your sense of worth “Doing” for a sense of value instead of knowing we have value because we live and breathe Outcomes Knowing done is better than perfect Busting shame Brene Brown--Our vulnerability is what actually connects us Sense of belonging and connection comes from allowing ourselves to be seen imperfectly That’s where connection begins Living from our values--regardless of whether goals are met or not. It can be about the process and not the outcome More self-acceptance More ease in relationships because the standards are more realistic Learning how to set goals that are achievable More contentment More satisfaction Actually accomplishing more due to acceptance Communication, vulnerability, authenticity Things we struggle with Afraid to say what you’re thinking Not trusting what you’re thinking Fear of judgment, criticism, being ridiculed Feeling like your point of view is wrong or not popular Afraid to really show up in relationships and allow yourself to be fully seen Being afraid to upset someone Being afraid to stir up problems in the relationship Not trusting that ruptures are repairable, and this actually points at growth We grow in relationships after a rupture Ruptures are a natural part of attachment--it doesn’t mean that there isn’t attachment Outcomes Educate others about the trait Why we need the lights low, Less stimulation Quiet areas Model healthy communication, authenticity, vulnerabilty More depth, closeness and trust in relationships Marshall Rosenberg’s non-violent communication All behavior is an attempt to get a need met Feelings and needs are never in conflict Strategies to get them met can be in conflict, and that requires creative problem-solving Life is figure out-able Creating a lifestyle that is HSP friendly and honors our HSP needs Things we struggle with Overwhelm Fatigue Resentment Feeling drained Overworking Living in a non-HSP world and trying to live like a non-HSP Outcomes Proper Care and Feeding of HSPs Getting enough rest, down time, quiet time Exercise Spirituality Just enough socializing Feeling a deeper sense of connection More meaning in your life Social justice work HSP style ~ having activist mentors Connecting with nature Learning how to do non-HSP events in manageable chunks Mindfulness Things we struggle with Overwhelmed and scattered Urge to numb out (TV, social media, Netflix) Outcomes Basic meditation instruction Formal and informal practices, moving meditation, guided meditation Learning how to curiously observe what comes up and to use it as information instead of reacting to things Self-acceptance More self-compassion and compassion for others Being more emotionally responsive vs emotionally reactive (Pause button) Meeting life on its terms instead of arm wrestling with it Demystifying emotions Things we struggle with My emotions overwhelm me I can’t control my emotions I’m emotionally reactive I’m embarrassed by my emotions Affect-phobia I don’t want to feel my emotions, they won’t go away My feelings will hurt me / others Outcomes Basic education about emotion theory Emotions can’t hurt us Emotions are to be honored and felt Emotions are impermanent Emotions are not something we can control Creating safety to feel our emotions Emotions can inform our actions/behavior but do not need to drive our behavior Mindfulness Feelings come and go - just energy moving through us Deep sense of connection when we get comfortable having our feelings BIO Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping highly sensitive people thrive in love, work, and parenting highly sensitive children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering. She can be reached at jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com or 215-292-5056. Learn more at heartfulnessconsulting.com or facebook.com/Heartfulnessconsulting. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. Patricia also facilitates online specialty groups for HSPs. For more information, go to https://patriciayounglcsw.com/hsp-online-groups/ LINKS www.heartfulnessconsulting.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/HeartfulnessConsulting To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
TITLE My Husband and I Talk About How We Met and Some of the Challenges We Have in Our Marriage GUEST Steve Young EPISODE OVERVIEW My husband, Steve Young, and I have a candid discussion about our origin story, detailing our lives before we met; first impressions upon meeting each other, and the challenges we experience as a couple, who have been married for more than 21 years. We talk about our differences being an HSP and non-HSP, and how we navigate those areas. HIGHLIGHTS We discuss how we met, and our first perceptions of each other Living as an HSP with a non-HSP We share different examples of how we are wired differently, and how differences in our family upbringing may have contributed to our wiring The traits that we love about our partners can also be the traits that just drive us crazy sometimes We discuss the ways that we navigate those moments of frustration or tension We share specific examples, from both perspectives, of when the differences in our personalities create challenging situations Communication is key - Discussing and naming our feelings and fears Steve shares his thoughts about learning I was a Highly Sensitive Person--we look back on our relationship after learning this We talk about how being able to name the challenges we experience has helped with acceptance in our daily lives We discuss the importance of recognizing and honoring each other’s differences PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
TITLE Overwhelm & Perfectionism - I’m in the Middle of the Struggle GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I’ve been struggling with overwhelm, perfectionism and feeling not good enough. I feel vulnerable sharing when I’m in the middle of the struggle, but the way to break shame is to name it. When we are growing and doing new things, our gremlins will come up. I talk about and name what my gremlins are saying, and I talk about the things I do when I’m struggling in spite of the desire to sit on the couch and numb out. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
TITLE Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) & Understanding How to Build Trust and Strengthen Connections GUEST Anya Surnitsky, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW We use Brene Brown’s work on attachment to continue our discussion about security, safety, and steps to building strong relationships. We talk about the marble jar and how trust can be established. We discuss vulnerability and how our needs can be met through connection and intimacy, as well as how to set boundaries to create safety. We include the traits of being a Highly Sensitive Person, and looking through the lens of Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN). HIGHLIGHTS Braving--the 7 components of trust from Brene Brown's work Giving ourselves permission to try and understand, that even though we experienced wounding before, that the new people in our lives won't necessarily be like the old people in our lives The Marble Jar method and, how it works in relationship building We discuss the importance of being shown by someone that you matter to them We talk about the importance of vulnerability HSPs often need to have time for transition before and after (work, getting up, arriving home, etc.) The importance for HSPs to be fully rested before having difficult conversations, so we are resilient and can be fully present We discuss how to check in with yourself; understanding where in your body, you are having reactions, and slowing down before you respond We talk about the relationship between Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), wounding, neglect, shame triggers and how to work through these things BREATHING --the 7 components of trust as outlined by Brene Brown is explained: Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Fault, Integrity, Non-judgement, and Generosity Resources Brene Brown Super Soul Sunday on trust: http://www.oprah.com/own-supersoulsessions/brene-brown-what-to-do-when-you-struggle-with-trust CES Therapy http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulation https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/integrative-mental-health-care/201809/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulation-ces-anxiety BIO Anya Surnitsky is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in private practice outside Philadelphia, PA. She helps anxious high achievers and overgivers with big wounded hearts to transform their pain into power and avoidance into action. Anya uses her training in EMDR, Ego State Therapy, and Childhood Emotional Neglect, as well as her certification in The Daring WayTM to aid clients in making peace with the past, embrace the present, and develop confidence for the future. Anya is passionate about educating clients on how trauma and/or neglect affects the developing brain to understand how unhealed wounds from the past show up in the present and can have a negative impact on their future. With these various approaches, Anya shows clients how to heal from both a top-down and a bottom-up approach; we can heal the brain so it can learn to help itself, and we can also learn skills to help ourselves on a conscious level. Throughout her personal and professional journey, Anya has learned that what people want more than anything is to be seen and heard for who they are at their core. For Unapologetically Sensitive listeners, Anya has put together some scripts for hard conversations to help HSP’s ask to be heard and dare to be seen in their relationships. Go to www.couragecompasstherapy.com/hsp . PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Links: www.couragecompasstherapy.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/couragecompasstherapy Instagram: https://instagram.com/couragecompasstherapy Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor -- David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - www.facebook.com/PitselehPictures
Bonus Episode 43 TITLE I Want More: You Want Less. How We Navigate Competing Needs in Relationships GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) often have different needs for connection in relationships. I talk about a recent incident where this happened, and it triggered my wounding of feeling like I’m “too much.” I talk about how I communicated, and what self-care looked like in this situation, and how I didn’t use rules to try and protect myself. Neither person has to be wrong when this happens. It’s all about communication. When we experience Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) this can complicate things. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
GUEST Anya Surnitsky, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW We use Brene Brown’s work on attachment to talk about security, safety, how we get our needs met, and how to survive when our needs aren't being met. What we all want is to be seen, heard, and to feel valued. Oftentimes, we are triggered due to Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), and trauma, which creates conflict in our relationships. We talk about shame, and Brene Brown’s antidote, which is empathy. In order for shame to survive, it requires secrecy, silence, and judgment. HIGHLIGHTS Anya discusses her personal experience as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) We are wired for survival and connection What is attachment? Everyday examples of what attachment is, and how it is affected by the world around us We discuss fear, and how it can be used productively Safety and connection are basic needs A lot of times, in relationships, we don't feel safe during a disagreement or a conflict Shame develops when we are let-down or abandoned. We tend to question what we did wrong. Anya provides some great tools for recognizing when we get triggered, and how we can work through shame attacks in order to move from our Reptilian Brain ('T-Rex Brain') back to our frontal lobe where productive communication can take place We discuss Alice Miller's book The Drama of the Gifted Child⦁ As adults, we often begin to recognize the effects of traumatic events from our childhood We discuss trauma with a little 't' Often times, there is a direct correlation between our caregivers' parental strengths and our strengths as adults Anya shares examples for different kinds of triggers Anya explains 'Box Breathing' as an effective tool to use when we feel triggered A technique for breathing includes the concept of--'smell the roses; blow out the candles' We discuss positive ways to navigate situations when we are activated We discuss The Story We Make Up In Our Heads, and how it can be used to break up shame; feel safe in our vulnerability, and restore security in our relationships Resources Brene Brown Super Soul Sunday on trust: http://www.oprah.com/own-supersoulsessions/brene-brown-what-to-do-when-you-struggle-with-trust CES Therapy http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulationhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/integrative-mental-health-care/201809/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulation-ces-anxiety BIO Anya Surnitsky is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in private practice outside Philadelphia, PA. She helps anxious high achievers and overgivers with big wounded hearts to transform their pain into power and avoidance into action. Anya uses her training in EMDR, Ego State Therapy, and Childhood Emotional Neglect, as well as her certification in The Daring WayTM to aid clients in making peace with the past, embrace the present, and develop confidence for the future. Anya is passionate about educating clients on how trauma and/or neglect affects the developing brain to understand how unhealed wounds from the past show up in the present and can have a negative impact on their future. With these various approaches, Anya shows clients how to heal from both a top-down and a bottom-up approach; we can heal the brain so it can learn to help itself, and we can also learn skills to help ourselves on a conscious level. Throughout her personal and professional journey, Anya has learned that what people want more than anything is to be seen and heard for who they are at their core. For Unapologetically Sensitive listeners, Anya has put together some scripts for hard conversations to help HSP’s ask to be heard and dare to be seen in their relationships. Go to www.couragecompasstherapy.com/hsp. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS www.couragecompasstherapy.com Facebook www.facebook.com/couragecompasstherapy Instagram @couragecompasstherapy Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” choose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.comPodcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Editor - David Petlansky of Pitseleh Pictures - facebook.com/PitselehPictures
Bonus Episode 42 TITLE Confusing Attachment, Things and Relationships—Or Why I Didn’t Want to Repaint My Son’s Room GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW When we have experienced Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), and have attachment wounds, we have often tried to control things when it’s about the relationship. We want to hold on to things or get rid of things since they represent attachment and relationships. As Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs), we have opportunities to focus on the strength of the attachment in the relationship. I talk about where this has shown up in my life and with my relationship with my son, and his relationship with his grandmother. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 25 TITLE Creativity & Feeling Like an Outsider GUEST Grace Chon EPISODE OVERVIEW Grace’s ability to connect with animals, has brought her success. Creativity is about the feelings that are evoked when we look at art, dance, etc. and how this relates to being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). Being a child of immigrant parents motivated Grace, and she talks about how she straddled traditional Korean culture and American culture, but felt invisible at school. We talk about how being an HSP (and not knowing it), may have contributed to her sense of feeling like an outsider. Grace talks about the ways creativity shows up, but we may not identify what we’re doing as creativity. HIGHLIGHTS Creativity is your unique human expression, and everyone is creative! Creativity is just a natural innate part of being human; we all have it. It’s just a matter of tapping into it and cultivating it. Creativity is any sort of innovation, and that can come through daily activity Creativity is an expression of feeling Scarcity verse abundance mindset How Grace’s parents came to the U.S. from South Korea with $50 and a suitcase, and made new lives for themselves and their children How Grace straddled 2 cultures How People can tap into their creativity Creativity and parenting BIO GRACE CHON is a commercial and editorial animal photographer, acclaimed for her highly expressive portraits of animals and authentic photos of people and their pets. Her clients include ad agencies, pet brands, magazines, publishing companies, celebrities, and TV shows. Now as a commercial and editorial photographer, Grace works with clients like Purina, Milkbone, Fancy Feast, Woman’s Day Magazine, Men’s Journal, and celebrities like Chris Pratt, Chelsea Handler, Clinton Kelly, Margaret Cho and Boo the Dog. Her work is featured in advertising, magazines, greeting cards, calendars, books, and television. In 2014, her photo series “Zoey and Jasper,” featuring her son and rescue dog, went viral around the world, with mentions by The Huffington Post, Mashable, Good Morning America, Buzzfeed, The Today Show, and countless mentions by the international media. In 2016, her photo series “HAIRY,” featuring dogs before and after their wildly cute haircuts, went viral again, with mentions by The Huffington Post, Buzzfeed, Refinery29, HelloGiggles, INSIDER, Yahoo, O the Oprah Magazine, Good Housekeeping, Vanity Fair Italia, and a number of international press from around the world. In 2018, newly photographed images from the “HAIRY” series went viral yet again, with mentions around the globe. Grace is also the author of 2 dog photography books - Waggish: Dogs Smiling for Dog Reasons and Puppy Styled: Japanese Dog Grooming Before and After. From creating award winning, viral ad campaigns to personal photography work that has gone viral multiple times, Grace knows how to craft ideas that get noticed. She believes the key to life is tuning in deeply to what your natural gifts are and sharing them others. She is passionate about empowering and teaching others how to do the same on her new podcast. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband, son, and 2 rescue dogs Maeby and Zoey. View her photography work at www.gracechon.com. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website--https://gracechon.com Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert TIME The Science of Creativity To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 41 TITLE Honoring Our Feelings In Relationships GUEST Solo episode Patricia Young, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) tend to minimize or dismiss their feelings when they feel hurt. I talk about honoring the feelings that come up for us. Many of us have grief from previous relationships that didn’t work out, but we aren’t taught how to process the loss. At the end, I give some specific ways you can start to do some healing work. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 024 TITLE We Didn’t Talk For 20 Years Due To A Mutual Therapist GUEST Laura Carr, LMFT EPISODE OVERVIEW Laura Carr, LMFT and I were best friends. We broke up and didn’t talk for 20 years due to a mutual therapist. We talk about friendship trauma and the grief associated with it. I gave Laura an ultimatum, and so did the therapist. We talk about how this impacted us, and the powerful repair work we have done since we reconnected. The importance of owning our mistakes, and how we rebuilt trust and established safety. The power of naming things, and HOW we practice open, vulnerable communication. I also talk at the end about the therapist that was a big part of this. HIGHLIGHTS We experience a tremendous amount of friendship trauma, but we don’t learn how to process it, so the grief and hurt gets buried, but makes it more challenging in subsequent relationships because we haven’t been taught how to process this type of trauma We really need to own our mistakes when we make them. There is incredible power and healing when we apologize sincerely and work to make living amends. It builds trust and safety in a relationship. Friendships have seasons, and sometimes friendships are good through certain times of our lives, but they are not meant to last forever. When we focus on rules and not on the relationship, there is no flexibility or ability to work through conflict. How do you develop trust? It takes time, and even though one can apologize, it’s laying a foundation of behaviors that back up the words to develop trust. It takes time, and it has to be earned. The power in naming things and having depth in a relationship where we can tell the truth from a place of love, and how it brings more depth and security to the relationship The gifts of allowing ourselves to be seen when we’re in relationship with another person who honors us and reflects back our strength. It allows us to be even more authentic. BIO Laura Carr is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in San Diego, CA. Laura has been in private practice since 1998. She co-created the orientation, Compassion Based Awareness Therapy which is an approach that integrates psychological theory and mindfulness. She opened Center for Mindful Relationships (CFMR) in 2012 which offers affordable counseling services to the public. This site also offers training to therapists who are gaining hours towards their MFT licensure. Laura has many roles: a mom, wife, friend, therapist, supervisor, meditator, animal lover, athlete, entrepreneur, and student of Zen. Laura is passionate about personal growth and development. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website--https://cfmrsandiego.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 23 TITLE Narcissism and the Highly Sensitive Person GUEST Dr. Natalie Jones EPISODE OVERVIEW What is narcissism? What does it look like in relationships (romantic and parental). Gaslighting—what is it? The connection between narcissists and HSPs (partners and parents). The HSP is often the scapegoat in the family. There may be a golden child and the children are pitted against each other. If you have a parent who is narcisstic, the HS child often feels guilty and believes what the narcissistic parent tells them (you’re too sensitive; too selfish; you never call me; you don’t care). Once people understand narcissism, they see that the limitation is in the parent, NOT the HSP. The energy of the room changes when the narcissist enters the room, and leaves the room. You can FEEL the energy shift. HIGHLIGHTS What someone who is in a relationship with someone with narcissistic traits may be experiencing Anxiety, depression, ambivalence Not sure where they stand in the relationship Unable to discuss serious problems Don’t’ know the future of the relationship Self-doubt and questioning Partner isn’t meeting your emotional needs What do narcisstic traits look like? It’s on a spectrum—mild, moderate, medium and severe They feel better than you They are in their own special category—they feel “special” and “above” you Hypocracy—do as I say, but not as I do—these rules apply to you, but not to me They objectify people—everything is seen as property and an extension of the narcissist You can make decisions without their approval There is danger when you want to leave the relationship They have a God-like or superior complex The believe they are special/beautiful and surround themselves with others they perceive to have the same superior qualities Narcisstic Personality Disorder is one of the cluster B Personality Disorders, among Antisocial Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder Fully Diagnosed Narcisstic Personality Disorder affects approximately 1-2% of the population. These are rare and extreme cases, and they tend to be part of the criminal justice system. What are red flags in the beginning of a relationship so you can spot someone with narcisstic traits? They have inconsistent, tumultuous, and short-term relationships with family, friends and partners. They are either the hero or the victim They appear too good to be true. They can be super charming, good looking and win people over easily in the beginning The move quickly in relationships. They have whirlwind romances; have sex early on in a relationship; rush to get married; rush to have children There is a degree of secrecy re: prior relationships. You feel like you don’t really know them, and they won’t discuss their problems They introduce you to family and close friends very quickly, but you seem to be insignificant to family and friends since they are always introducing a new partner What types of people do narcissists tend to look for in partners? People they can control, pressure or subject a position of power over or they can easily isolate They like empathic people like Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) because they can play their heartstrings and the HSP is more likely to forgive them They won’t seek out other narcissists or powerful people (too much conflict) People who have a history or trauma, so they can retraumatize you and they know how to find your wounds and use them against you They tend to align themselves with people (not partners) of greater status They name drop—people they don’t know, but it’s to feel powerful What is gaslighting? It’s psychological brainwashing Manipulating someone psychologically so that person questions their reality The person doesn’t trust their own perceptions or themselves It’s like living in the Twilight Zone Jim Jones is an example They will compliment and degrade you in the same sentence They will change the topic in order to deflect or to blame They will triangulate with a 3rd party to invalidate you and make you doubt yourself They project their insecurities onto you They have tantrums and showdowns—especially on holidays or special occasions and you feel bad and doubt yourself. What does it look like if you have a narcisstic parent? The parent is not invested in your or the problems that come up for you They will make it about them—i.e., Had it not been for me, then you (minimize your experience) They often will just say, “Because I’m your mother/father.” They will tell you, “That’s not a real problem.” People who have a narcisstic parent may dissociate, turn the radio up, or find ways to “check out.” They may keep contact with the narcisstic parent short and sweet Narcisstic parents will call their children names, take advantage of them, expect them to care for the other siblings You can feel the energy in the room change when a narcissist enters and when they leave the room. It’s like they pull energy from the room, and everyone feels it. RESOURCES Podcasts A Date With Darkness—Dr. Natalie Jones https://drnataliejones.com/podcast/ Codependency No More—Brian Piser https://www.codependencynomore.com/category/podcast/ Love Junkie: Help for the Relationship Obsessed, Love Addicted, & Codependent—Shena Tubbs https://www.listennotes.com/podcasts/love-junkie-help-for-the-relationship-uNjKz54H8fe/ Books Toxic Parents by Susan Forward Mothers Who Can’t Love by Susan Forward Unspoken Legacy: Addressing the Impact of Trauma and Addiction within the Family by Claudia Black Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men By Lundy Bancroft The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide To Changing The Patterns Of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships by Harriet Lerner The Dance of Fear: Rising Above Anxiety, Fear, and Shame to Be Your Best and Bravest Self by Harriet Lerner Women Who Love Too Much: When You Keep Wishing and Hoping He'll Change by Robin Norwood Confessions of a Narcissist by HG Tudor (there are MANY books by this author) Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Dr. Karyl McBride Ph.D. Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide For Separation, Liberation & Inspiration by Karen C.L. Anderson Surviving Mama An Adult Daughter’s Guide by Dr. Pamela Everett Thompson Youtuber Kim Saeed-- https://www.youtube.com/user/LetMeReach BIO Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is a Licensed professional clinical counselor and a post doctoral intern. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes. Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts they have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS https://www.drnataliejones.com https://www.adatewithdarkness.com. IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliejones/ IG2: https://www.instagram.com/adatewithdarknesspodcast/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/drnataliejones/ FB2: https://www.facebook.com/adatewithdarkness/ FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/196036654267594/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Dr_NatalieJones Twitter 2: https://twitter.com/ADateWDarkness To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 40 TITLE What Being A “Stand Up Guy” Means—A Beautiful Story Of Integrity GUEST Joshua Young EPISODE OVERVIEW My Son Joshua was in the middle of taking a chemistry mid-term at college (he’s on academic probation), and the instructor took his exam away during the test and excused him from class. Josh shares how his thinking spiraled to his future (not in a good way). He decided to handle this situation with integrity, and the outcome is a beautiful reflection of the very mature way that Josh handled this challenging situation. BIO Josh Young is a freshman at Cal State University Fullerton where he is a business major. Josh has a wicked sense of humor, and he loves to push the rules until they just about break. Josh just started playing Club Baseball for CSUF. He also loves doing distance cycling, and he did his first triathalon a few years ago. He also participates in marathon napping, and spending time with his best friend and his girlfriend PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 022 TITLE Laura Carr, LMFT Interviews Patricia Young About Being A Highly Sensitive Person GUEST Laura Carr, LMFT EPISODE OVERVIEW Laura Carr, LMFT interviews me. I talk about the benefits of knowing you’re a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). We talk about when I got the idea for the podcast, and my mission for it. I answer the questions I ask my guests about being a Highly Sensitive Person. Laura shares her initial impression when she first heard the term Highly Sensitive Person. How my view of myself has changed since starting the podcast, and what I’ve learned in the past 5 months since launching the podcast. We talk about a new definition of play that may be more suitable for HSPs. I talk about what I would have told my younger self. I talk about being loud and proud, well quiet and proud. HIGHLIGHTS When did I get the idea for the podcast? What’s the benefit of knowing you’re an HSP? Why did I start this podcast? What’s my mission for the podcast. How my view of myself has changed since starting the podcast Do I feel articulate? The power of being able to see ourselves authentically. What I would want my younger self to know BIO Laura Carr is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in San Diego, CA. Laura has been in private practice since 1998. She co-created the orientation, Compassion Based Awareness Therapy which is an approach that integrates psychological theory and mindfulness. She opened Center for Mindful Relationships (CFMR) in 2012 which offers affordable counseling services to the public. This site also offers training to therapists who are gaining hours towards their MFT licensure. Laura has many roles: a mom, wife, friend, therapist, supervisor, meditator, animal lover, athlete, entrepreneur, and student of Zen. Laura is passionate about personal growth and development. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website--https://cfmrsandiego.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Bonus Episode 39 TITLE Is it Depression, Or Are We Retreating to Recharge & Replenish? GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) often withdraw, and label this withdrawal as depression or going into the cave. The world is very loud, busy and stimulating, and HSPs need to have time to retreat into a calm quiet place. Maybe it’s a cave with twinkle lights, good snacks and snuggly blankets. HSPs sometimes feel they are being flaky or undependendable, when it’s really just a natural rhythm and a need to restore. When we retreat, do we communicate with others to let them know we need time to pull back? We need to honor our needs in order to maximize the gifts we have to share with the world. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia also works with people who tend to be perfectionistic, and don’t feel good enough. They often identify as being depressed and/or having anxiety. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 21 TITLE Intuition and Knowing Your Worth GUEST Kelly Covert EPISODE OVERVIEW We address the following questions in this episode--What is intuition? Is one’s Inner Voice ever mean or critical? How do you encourage people to get in touch with their intuition? How do we encourage or shut down intuition and communication in kids? We talk about creating meaningful relationships with your children instead of letting rules dictate the relationship. Kelly shares about creating a family mission statement. HIGHLIGHTS Intuition is that inner voice/wisdom We all have intuition It’s a Divine part of who you are We just need to take time to listen to it Intuition is never mean or critical—that’s our ego, which comes from our head How do you encourage people to explore their intuition: Listen to your inner voice Find practices that get us still enough to hear it Journaling (or verbally processing) to get our of your head How do you encourage intuition and communication in kids? Lead by example Ask the right questions Put the relationship before the punishment or judgment How can you tell the difference between intuition and fear? Intuition is never mean Inner mean girls and critical voices are egocentric What’s your superpower as an HSP? If you listen deeply, you can hear other people’s inner voices, and you can help people connect to their inner voice. I have amazing ideas for other people that come to me through Divine Inspiration “Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.” What would you tell your younger self? You are enough. You don’t have to try so hard “My inner voice is loving. It knows my worth, and that I am worthy. It guides me. It’s powerful, encouraging and it can show us the error of our ways.” BIO Kelly Covert is an inner voice coach with a passion for helping women believe and achieve their big vision by connecting deeply with the wisdom that is inside of them all while owning their worthiness each and every day. Through her intuitive, heart-centered coaching, she helps women awaken to their true power as creators and world-changers. She is the creator and host of In Her Voice, a podcast for women who feel called to more - to lead, to create, to dream and to change the world. Her work has been featured on The Huffington Post, The Elephant Journal, YourTango.com, and she has been a featured guest on many podcasts. Kelly is also a professional flutist with Symphoria, a wife and the mother of 2 boys, 15 and 12, and 1 beautiful beagle named Piper. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Many clients who come to see her experience depression & anxiety, and they report struggling with perfectionism and not feeling good enough. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts they have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website-- https://www.kellycovert.com/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/kellyjcovert/ Twitter-- https://twitter.com/Kellyjcovert Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ Dr. Ted Zeff’s website— http://www.drtedzeff.com/ Strong Sensitive Boy Dr. Ted Zeff Dr. Ross Greene--https://www.livesinthebalance.org/ The Explosive Child Dr. Ross Greene Lost at School Dr. Ross Greene To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 38 TITLE We Never Know How Our Presence Impacts Others GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW We can feel insignificant, unimportant, and that we are not making an impact on the world, but we never really know how much just being ourselves is impacting others. I talk about how a neighbor who walks by my house daily impacted me when he “went missing,” and how I communicated with him when he turned up again. When we experience loss, stability in our day-to-day routine can bring great comfort. Letting others know you miss their presence can cause a huge shift for another since we often struggle with imposter syndrome and feeling like we’re just not enough. I also talk about Chuy (the person), and Chewie (the dog—who has an Instagram account). BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
Episode 20 TITLE Part 2 Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), & the HSP GUEST Dr. Erika Martinez EPISODE OVERVIEW What is Childhood Emotional Neglect and how does it affect non-HSPs and HSPs? A Highly Sensitive Person being raised by a non-HSP parent could cause CEN. Some symptoms of CEN-- feelings of emptiness (a void), feeling deeply and fatally flawed; don’t feel good enough; feeling unlovable/unlikable; seeking external validation to know you’re ok; being very self-sufficient; may have been parentified, may struggle with being assertive, being angry, experience self-blame; have a hard time asking for help; may have trust issues, may be anxious, depressed or stressed out. We talk about vantage sensitivity, attachment styles and exercises to work with CEN. HIGHLIGHTS What is Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN)? A Lack of parental attunement to the child’s emotional needs, and a lack of responsiveness to their emotional needs CEN is such an invisible thing—it’s what failed to happen for you Symptoms of CEN—feelings of emptiness (a void), feeling deeply and fatally flawed; don’t feel good enough; feeling unlovable/unlikable; seeking external validation to know you’re ok; being very self-sufficient; may have been parentified, may struggle with being assertive, being angry, experience self-blame; have a hard time asking for help; may have trust issues, may be anxious, depressed or stressed out If you’re an HSP, and your parents were non-HSPs, that in and of itself could cause CEN Counterdependence—difficulty asking for help Notes from Dr. Jonice Webb’s article “Childhood Emotional Neglect Undermines the Highly Sensitive Person’s Best Strengths “You feel things deeply and powerfully…When you grow up emotionally neglected, you learn that your emotions are useless and should be ignored and hidden. This takes your powerful force from within, disempowers it, and perhaps even shames you for having it.” “You are a deep thinker who needs to have meaning and purpose in your life…you get the message that your feelings don’t matter…since your emotions are the most deeply personal expression of who you are, it’s natural for you as a child to internalize the message as ‘I don’t matter.’…going through your adult life, you tend to feel less important than other people, and this undermines your ability to experience yourself and your life as meaningful and important. “Your intense feelings and your need to have meaning and purpose in your life both make your relationships heartfelt and genuine…you miss out on the opportunity to learn how to understand and manage your emotions and the emotions of others. Truth or Myth—Because I have CEN and had to learn to read the environment to survive, the CEN CAUSED me to be an HSP Vantage Sensitivity—HSPs will thrive and benefit more in a positive environment than non-HSPs, and conversely, HSPs will be more negatively affected in adverse environments (CEN) than non-HSPs. So HSPs respond better and worse in positive and negative environments/settings than non-HSPs When HSPs find themselves in environments that don’t validate and mirror their feelings, they develop coping mechanisms to push down and bury their emotional world. The HSP learns to “dim” or turn down their emotions to fit in the household, but it comes at the expense of their HSP gifts. 4 Types of Attachment Styles—the 1st is a secure style and the remaining 3 are insecure style Secure attachment Dismissive or avoidant—they don’t connect or seek out relationships Anxious or preoccupied—they’re very worried about being in a relationship; they’re worried about their partner, or their partner’s needs. There can be excessive rumination/worry and racing thoughts Fearful or avoidant—they seek out relationships, then they run away from them. It’s a yo-yo relationship Shame Shields from Dr. Brene Brown’s Research Move toward people—anxious, preoccupied. They tend to be perfectionistic or people-pleasing Move away/withdraw--dismissive Move against—aggressive (passive aggressive), act out, fearful, avoidant, condescending Specific exercises from the book Running on Empty by Dr. Jonice Webb Understand the purpose and value of emotions Alexithymia—being emotionally illiterate and having a difficult time understanding the behavior of other people Identify your own emotions 3x/day Monitor your feelings and how they shift throughout the day Accept and trust your feelings Learn to express yourself effectively Self-care and self-compassion Self-discipline (there is usually an excess of or a lack of) BIO Erika Martinez, Psy.D., a Florida licensed psychologist and certified educator, specializes in the assessment and treatment of a variety of mental health conditions in young adults. Combing her expertise in neuropsychology, assessment, trauma, and shame resilience, she helps others explore life’s challenging areas and brainstorm solutions using their personal strengths. With greater self-awareness and confidence, they are able to move forward and lead personally and professionally rewarding lives. Dr. Martinez provides therapy to high-achievers, professional millennials, and entrepreneurs facing quarter-life crises, relationship meltdowns, and existential dilemmas which can present as a myriad of symptoms including anxiety, destructive behaviors, self-sabotage, depression, loneliness, burn out, poor self-esteem, shame, and impaired social skills. She previously worked in graphic design, human resources, and community mental health. Prior to private practice, she worked in secondary and university public education settings for a decade helping parents, educators, and counselors better understand and serve students with AD/HD, Giftedness, and learning disabilities. Dr. Martinez is also a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator (CDWF), bringing the groundbreaking research and curriculum on vulnerability, courage, shame, and worthiness developed by Dr. Brené Brown to South Florida. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts they have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website https://envisionwellness.co Youtube https://www.youtube.com/c/ErikaMartinezPsyDCoralGables Instagram https://www.instagram.com/envisionwellnessco/ https://drjonicewebb.com/ https://drjonicewebb.com/how-childhood-emotional-neglect-undermines-the-highly-sensitive-persons-3-greatest-strengths/ Running on Empty Dr. Jonice Webb Running on Empty No More Dr. Jonice Webb Daring Greatly Dr. Brene Brown Rising Strong Dr. Brene Brown Gifts of Imperfection Dr. Brene Brown Ted Talks Brene Brown The Power of Vulnerability https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability?language=en Listening to Shame https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame/transcript?language=en Daring Way Weekend Intensive (Dr. Brene Brown’s work) https://thedaringway.org/group/rising-strong-daring-way-weekend-intensive/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ Dr. Ted Zeff’s website— http://www.drtedzeff.com/ Strong Sensitive Boy Dr. Ted Zeff HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 37 TITLE Vulnerability, My Insecurities & Rants About Therapists GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I realized that I have been trying to justify why I choose to be vulnerable, transparent and allow others to see me when I’m in the midst of struggling. I’ve internalized perceived criticism from therapists that have a different orientation. I just continue to fight against the gremlins in my head that want to shame me for showing up in the world the way that I do. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 20 TITLE Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), and the HSP GUEST Dr. Erika Martinez EPISODE OVERVIEW What is Childhood Emotional Neglect and how does it affect non-HSPs and HSPs? These are some symptoms of CEN-- feelings of emptiness (a void), feeling deeply and fatally flawed; don’t feel good enough; feeling unlovable/unlikable; seeking external validation to know you’re ok; being very self-sufficient; may have been parentified, may struggle with being assertive, being angry, experience self-blame; have a hard time asking for help; may have trust issues, may be anxious, depressed or stressed out. Dr. Martinez talks about how to identify CEN and ways to begin the healing process. HIGHLIGHTS What is Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN)? A Lack of parental attunement to the child’s emotional needs, and a lack of responsiveness to their emotional needs CEN is such an invisible thing—it’s what failed to happen for you Symptoms of CEN—feelings of emptiness (a void), feeling deeply and fatally flawed; don’t feel good enough; feeling unlovable/unlikable; seeking external validation to know you’re ok; being very self-sufficient; may have been parentified, may struggle with being assertive, being angry, experience self-blame; have a hard time asking for help; may have trust issues, may be anxious, depressed or stressed out The HSP in a household with CEN is often the scapegoat and they are ridiculed for their deep processing of emotion. They can feel very wrong, and like they don’t fit in. Sometimes they are referred to as the blacksheep of the family. They are the “disrupter.” Often this person is the healthiest and most differentiated in the family and they are often the “truth teller.” 3 types of groups parents fall into Self-involved, narcissistic, sociopath, addicted, authoritarian Struggling parents—depressed, bereaved, divorced, special needs children or caring for relatives or aging parents Well-meaning—neglected as children, workaholics, achievement oriented, perfectionistic, permissive, tiger parents Counterdependence—difficulty asking for help BIO Erika Martinez, Psy.D., a Florida licensed psychologist and certified educator, specializes in the assessment and treatment of a variety of mental health conditions in young adults. Combing her expertise in neuropsychology, assessment, trauma, and shame resilience, she helps others explore life’s challenging areas and brainstorm solutions using their personal strengths. With greater self-awareness and confidence, they are able to move forward and lead personally and professionally rewarding lives. Dr. Martinez provides therapy to high-achievers, professional millennials, and entrepreneurs facing quarter-life crises, relationship meltdowns, and existential dilemmas which can present as a myriad of symptoms including anxiety, destructive behaviors, self-sabotage, depression, loneliness, burn out, poor self-esteem, shame, and impaired social skills. She previously worked in graphic design, human resources, and community mental health. Prior to private practice, she worked in secondary and university public education settings for a decade helping parents, educators, and counselors better understand and serve students with AD/HD, Giftedness, and learning disabilities. Dr. Martinez is also a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator (CDWF), bringing the groundbreaking research and curriculum on vulnerability, courage, shame, and worthiness developed by Dr. Brené Brown to South Florida. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts they have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website https://envisionwellness.co Youtube https://www.youtube.com/c/ErikaMartinezPsyDCoralGables Instagram https://www.instagram.com/envisionwellnessco/ https://drjonicewebb.com/ https://drjonicewebb.com/how-childhood-emotional-neglect-undermines-the-highly-sensitive-persons-3-greatest-strengths/ Running on Empty Dr. Jonice Webb Running on Empty No More Dr. Jonice Webb Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ Dr. Ted Zeff’s website— http://www.drtedzeff.com/ Strong Sensitive Boy Dr. Ted Zeff HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 36 TITLE Being Vulnerable and Having Deep Feelings Takes Courage and Strength GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW This is a pretty vulnerable episode. My husband was out of town, and toward the end of the week I sent my husband and message that I was struggling, and he didn’t respond. This really hurt my feelings, and I realized that I have a hard time being direct and asking for what I need. I wasn’t taking care of my need for play and doing creative projects, and I was feeling resentful because my husband is really good about taking care of his needs. I also realized that I function better when he is gone. I talk about how we both used this information to create something that works better for both of us. I also talk about some things that I did to shift my energy to create a lighter more playful environment for myself. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 19 TITLE The Key To Helping Someone with Rejection Sensitivity is Helping Them Develop a Sense of Security GUEST Jared DeFife Ph.D. EPISODE OVERVIEW Dr. DeFife works with people who are emotionally intense, tend to be perfectionistic and sensitive to criticism. He talks about Rejection Sensitivity, which has 3 primary components. Dr. DeFife talks about the 3 Cs to help if you experience Rejection Sensitivity. We talk about 2 types of perfectionism, muscle dysmorphia and the benefits of self-disclosure and authenticity by therapists in the therapeutic relationship. HIGHLIGHTS Rejection Sensitivity Anxious anticipation of [rejection] Ready perception of [seeing rejection in neutral situations when it may not be there] Intense reaction to [criticism, failure, set backs, exclusion, lack of belonging] Rejection Sensitivity is highly correlated with aggression and hostililty—this can look like behavior that is snide or snippy. The person engages in hostile and rejecting behavior, then creates the rejection due to their behavior. The person ends up creating what they are most afraid of. They get into this vicious cycle. Rejection Sensitivity can also include reactions where the person engages in social avoidance or shutting down. Rejection Sensitivity is a process that people engage in to avoid feeling shame. In Anxious Anticipation Of—the person imagines that they probably won’t be accepted or liked before the interaction. They may imagine that the other person will think they’re stupid. Perfectionism isn’t really about wanting things to be perfect At the root, it’s that other people will see that we’re defective and inadequate Perfectionism can be a survival skill for some, and if you take it away, you’re taking away the way they believe they can fit in. There are different types of perfectionism Self-oriented perfectionism—competing against yourself (like an athlete would). This can be a healthy form of perfectionism. Socially prescribed perfectionism—If I don’t get this right, people will think I’m an idiot, or I’ll be rejected. Rejection Sensitivity is transdiagnostic—you will see it across many different diagnoses like depressive disorders, anxiety disorders, personality disorders, eating disorders and substance use disorders. Muscle dysmorphia—"is a subtype ofbody dysmorphic disorder (BDD), in which people, mostly males, are obsessed with the size of their muscles. They worry that they are not muscular or lean enough or that their bodies are too underdeveloped and weak. Their symptoms cause significant distress and hinder their ability to socialize, go to work, and/or participate in daily activities. In many cases, people with muscle dysmorphia have average or above average muscularity.” Quoted from https://mghocd.org/what-is-muscle-dysmorphia/ The Key to helping someone with Rejection Sensitivity is to help them develop a sense of security. The way to do this is with the 2 Cs Calmness—to calm down that fueled intense reactivity Clarity—learning what your wants and needs are, and knowing your life story so you are clear about your own desires, motivations and interests Connections—having safe relationships with others where you can be vulnerable, and open with others and you don’t have to keep your feelings to yourself Being a psychologically health person isn’t about being a perfect person. Of course it’s about being vulnerable RESOURCES— Don’t Take It Personally! The Art of Dealing With Rejection Elayne Savage PhD Books by Brene Brown--https://www.google.com/search?q=brene+brown+books&oq=brene+brown+books&aqs=chrome..69i57j0l5.2786j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8 Mentalization Based Therapy Schema Therapy DBT—Dialectical Behavioral Therapy Metacognitive Interpersonal Therapy Radically Open DBT BIO Jared DeFife, PhD (www.jareddefife.com) is a clinical psychologist in private practice in Atlanta, GA and an Adjunct Assistant Professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Emory University School of Medicine. Dr. DeFife specializes in helping people who identify as “emotionally intense”, perfectionistic, self-critical, and interpersonally sensitive to criticism or rejection. His practice integrates from interpersonal and personality-focused therapies drawing from Schema-Focused, Mentalization-Based, and RO-DBT approaches for chronic depression/anxiety, interpersonal problems, and personality disorder concerns. Dr. DeFife has published widely in professional journals and been a frequent media commentator on mental health and interpersonal relationships for numerous television, podcast, and print outlets including the BBC World News, Psychotherapy Networker, Yahoo! Health, Self, Bustle, Women’s Health and Men’s Health magazines, and The Huffington Post. He is a regular blog contributor to Psychology Today. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS Website—https://www.jareddefife.com/ http://grantome.com/grant/NIH/R01-MH081948-04 https://www.ffri.hr/~ibrdar/komunikacija/seminari/Downey,%201996%20-%20Rejection%20Sensitivity%20for%20intimate%20relationsh.pdf https://www.researchgate.net/publication/200008742_Self-esteem_and_rejection_sensitivity_in_close_relationships Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 35 TITLE How To Honor Our Needs When Things Feel Unjust GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) feel things deeply, and we have an incredibly strong sense of wanting things to be just, fair and equitable, and when they aren’t, it can be very upsetting to us. Many of us have been told to mind our own business. We perceive things that others don’t, so we catch things that others miss, and we just want things to be fair. I talk about not staying in my own lane, and consequently having a shame attack. I learned that I need to honor that part of me that wants fairness and doesn’t want anyone taking advantage of another or not pulling their own weight. How do we know when it’s the right time to step in and advocate and when we need to allow others to sort things out. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 18 TITLE Women’s Experiences Matter and Women’s Emotional Lives Matter GUEST Sara Wachter-Boettcher EPISODE OVERVIEW Sara talks about the importance of centering on women’s voices in media, and the importance of showing women in deep, rich, emotional conversations with each other in order to show how powerful it can be when we are vulnerable, and open and honest with each other. Sara talks about the common beliefs that prevent people from taking it to the next level, and steps they can take to get there. We talk about the value of learning from what didn’t work out, and often success is more about the process than the end result. We talk a quote someone said, “You can be a hot mess, and be successful.” HIGHLIGHTS In many environments, women are taught that in order to get ahead, they need to stuff all their feelings down, and that’s what professionalism means Women are taught that to be good at their jobs, they should be more unfeeling; more unstoic, and then they are perceived as unlikable when they are those things We’re extremely good at what we do. We’re competent; we’re ambitious, and we are successful, and we are also people that are unashamed to say, “Hey, I cried twice today.” I’m still good at what I do; I’m still competent and I’m still successful The contradicting messages women receive—you’re too aggressive, and you need to speak up. There are double standards for women, and a narrow tightrope for women to walk in order to be perceived as “just right.” You can spend your entire life just trying to do it “just right,” and still get the message that it’s not good enough We’re creating a space where we can say that none of those rules apply, and we can talk with women about things that matter to them on their own terms, so that people don’t feel less alone, and less alone in processing those toxic messages they get You can be a hot mess and successful at the same time In a male dominated culture, there is an emphasis on glossing over anything that makes you feel vulnerable. The problem with this is that people don’t learn anything from your story about being awesome. That is not helpful for someone else trying to learn from you Success is not any pure thing that doesn’t have down sides to it BIO Sara Wachter-Boettcher runs Rare Union, a strategy consultancy, and cohosts Strong Feelings, a weekly podcast about living your best feminist life at work. She's also a keynote speaker and the author of three tech/design books: Technically Wrong: Sexist Apps, Biased Algorithms, and Other Threats of Toxic Tech from W.W. Norton in 2017, Design for Real Life (with Eric Meyer) from A Book Apart in 2016, and Content Everywhere from Rosenfeld Media in 2012. Her work has been featured in The Washington Post, Slate, The Guardian, and more, and she’s spoken at dozens of events across four continents related to tech and design. LINKS Website--rareunion.com Website--strongfeelings.co Website--www.sarawb.com Twitter--twitter.com/sara_ann_marie Podcast—Strong Feelings Elizabeth Gilbert Big Magic To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 017 Part 2 TITLE Conversations with a Non-Binary HSP Therapist GUEST Dara Hoffman-Fox EPISODE OVERVIEW Dara talks about being non-binary, and the challenges with the use of language and pronouns Dara uses. Dara defines CIS gender, and we explore microagressions (how they show up in the LGBTQ+ population, and how Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPS) may experience them on a daily basis. Dara also discusses the challenges in trying to get the gender markers changed with the DMV to reflect Dara’s non-binary status. BIO DARA HOFFMAN-FOX, LPC, is a queer-identified gender therapist in private practice in Colorado Springs, CO. As a subject-matter expert on transgender and nonbinary issues, Dara is the creator of the "Conversations with a Gender Therapist" YouTube channel as well as the author of the Amazon #1 bestseller YOU AND YOUR GENDER IDENTITY: A GUIDE TO DISCOVERY. Dara's goal is to get as much education, resources, and support out there as possible to the trans and gender-questioning persons of the world. Through the magic of the internet Dara is am able to do this through their Conversations with a Gender Therapist YouTube channel and Facebook pWage, media and podcast interviews, and the content you’ll find on their website, found at darahoffmanfox.com. LINKS Websites: http://darahoffmanfox.com/ http://discoveryourgenderidentity.com/ http://www.thebohemiansanctuary.com Facebook (friend request): https://www.facebook.com/dara.hoffman.3 Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/darahoffmanfoxlpc/ Trans-Affirming Therapists Academy: https://trans-affirming-therapists-academy.teachable.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/darahoffmanfox An in-depth article about the "do's and don'ts" of trans-sensitive language. https://radicalcopyeditor.com/2017/08/31/transgender-style-guide/ http://www.howtobeagirlpodcast.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review" Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 017 Part I TITLE Conversations with a Non-Binary HSP Therapist GUEST Dara Hoffman-Fox EPISODE OVERVIEW Dara talks about being non-binary, and the challenges with the use of language and pronouns that many non-binary persons encounter. We discuss topics that include defining “transgender,” as well as what it’s like to go through what feels like the “wrong” puberty, which can be one of the more challenging aspects of the experience of being transgender. Dara also talks about the distinction between sexual orientation and gender identity; defines “cisgender,” and why using a person’s pronouns are important. I also talk about my concern and worry about wanting to use the “right” language, and having to think SO hard because I want to be respectful, because it takes a lot of concentration to use new language. BIO DARA HOFFMAN-FOX, LPC, is a queer-identified gender therapist in private practice in Colorado Springs, CO. As a subject-matter expert on transgender and nonbinary issues, Dara is the creator of the "Conversations with a Gender Therapist" YouTube channel as well as the author of the Amazon #1 bestseller YOU AND YOUR GENDER IDENTITY: A GUIDE TO DISCOVERY. Dara's goal is to get as much education, resources, and support out there as possible to the trans and gender-questioning persons of the world. Through the magic of the internet Dara is am able to do this through their Conversations with a Gender Therapist YouTube channel and Facebook page, media and podcast interviews, and the content you’ll find on their website, found at darahoffmanfox.com. LINKS Websites: http://darahoffmanfox.com/ http://discoveryourgenderidentity.com/ http://www.thebohemiansanctuary.com Facebook (friend request): https://www.facebook.com/dara.hoffman.3 Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/darahoffmanfoxlpc/ Trans-Affirming Therapists Academy: https://trans-affirming-therapists-academy.teachable.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/darahoffmanfox An in-depth article about the "do's and don'ts" of trans-sensitive language. https://radicalcopyeditor.com/2017/08/31/transgender-style-guide/ http://www.howtobeagirlpodcast.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 34 TITLE Update After The Holidays When I Lost My Shirt GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW How we get our needs met when we are in a family or community of non-HSPs. Even with other Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs), we don’t always have the same needs, and it can be challenging to assert ourselves and work as a community so everyone gets their needs met. I recap the Thanksgiving break when my twins came home from college with a roommate and the other’s girlfriend, and we had kids sleeping on the couch, and I lost my dedicated work space. I was irritable, depleted, and not my best self. Bonus Episode 21 is called I Lost My Shirt! (and it’s Not About the Gravy), and on Bonus Episode 23 How to Care For Ourselves When We’re Feeling Depleted and Bonus Epsiode 24 Working Together and Respecting Different Needs and Expectations I share about how difficult and disruptive it is to have HSP needs, and not realize it. In this episode I talk about how we did it differently, and how it worked out. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 16 TITLE The Gift Of Vulnerability is Connection; That’s Why I Take the Risk GUEST Christina Miglino EPISODE OVERVIEW The gifts of vulnerability! What is vulnerability? Why would you want to be vulnerable? What makes it difficult to be vulnerable? How shame can inhibit vulnerability. Calling our power back. We also talk about the connection between courage and vulnerability by Brene Brown. HIGHLIGHTS I didn’t really fit the model of the 9-5er who’s hustling to make ends meet Being highly sensitive means I need breaks; I need time alone; I need to pay attention to my energy systems I get to own my schedule and make time for the things that do matter and allow me to perform really well and to be my best self in my work I’m highly sensitive and I’ve pushed myself to a level that is totally unhealthy work wise Symptoms can be like arrows pointing to where we need to slow down Symptoms can include—migraines, fatigue, depression, overwhelm, irritability, being more negative We get to see that we’re more similar than different It’s not unusual for someone to feel too afraid to step through that [being vulnerable] and expose themselves Fear keeps me from being vulnerable because I’m afraid I’m going to be rejected Brene Brown defines vulnerability as having these elements uncertainty emotional risk emotional exposure Brene Brown talks about the relationship between courage and vulnerability Can’t have courage without vulnerability Can you think of a time when you were courageous and you DIDN’T have Uncertainty Risk Emotional exposure BIO Christina Miglino is a Soul Catalyst, Shamanic Practitioner, and Artist, who has traveled all over the US and Canada as a Teacher, Healer and Public Speaker. She has hosted and taught many workshops on Personal Power, Leadership and Emotional Intelligence. Christina is passionate about supporting people in upleveling their soul’s ascension process, stepping into their power and listening more to their intuition so that they can have the life and business that they were meant for. She currently has open enrollment for her 9-month Group Program called, The Sea Within for visionary soul’s seeking to activate their creativity and soul’s potential! for more information about that program please send an email. LINKS Email: info@christinamiglino.com Website: www.christinamiglino.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/christina.miglino Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christinamiglino/ Glennon Doyle Melton Brene Brown—Courage and vulnerability Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 33 TITLE Tell Me About Your Experience with Therapy GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I want to hear about your experience(s) with therapy! Whether you’re a therapist, a consumer or both, how would you describe what therapy is? What has been helpful when you’ve been in therapy, and what wasn’t helpful? What are the reasons people go to therapy? What are the groups/populations that I neglect to talk about? Please let me know, so I can give a shout out! Please send me an e-mail and let me know if you’d like your name (and practice if you’re a therapist) mentioned, or if you’d prefer to remain anonymous. I really want to hear what you have to say! Tell me all about therapy—anything goes! BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 15 TITLE Releasing Accumulated Belongings Can Lead to Greater Freedom in all Areas of Life GUEST Michael Spencer EPISODE OVERVIEW I admit for the first time in my life that I’m a closeted woo, and I came out of my baby woo closet. Michael is Super Woo (I called it Woo factorial). We talk about how accumulating stuff can impact how we feel and how energy can get stuck when things pile up in our homes. Michael talks about ways to shift the energy, and energy tools we can use to help in this process. We talk about Marie Kondo and her book and Netflix show Tidying Up, and ways as Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs), we can modify her techniques, so we don’t get overwhelmed. Energy vibration includes feelings like sadness, anger, depression, gremlins, joy, happiness, hopefulness, optimism and excitement. HIGHLIGHTS We can use our intention to tune in in to the vibration of objects We can use energy tools (sound, crystals, sage) to help move stuck or stagnant energy in things or in our environment Everything in the universe is made of energy We can shift the energy of our homes When we feel stuck or stagnant, it’s possible we are ignoring or denying a part of ourselves Part of how we tend to ourselves is by gently and mindfully exploring the possibility of shifting the energy and our relationship to our stuff There’s a difference between seasonal storage that we pull out regularly, and the other stuff that has been put away and has been left there. We often have emotions around clearing our stuff We need to honor how we clear our spaces so we don’t get overwhelmed BIO Michael Spencer is the founder of Let's Purify!, an online business dedicated to the purification and upliftment of the home energy of our living spaces, personal energy fields, and our planet. Michael has honed a process called Home Energy Purification to help soulful people release attachments to accumulated belongings and experience greater freedom in all areas of life. With training as a mental health counselor, Reiki practitioner, and Modern Day Priestess, Michael brings a wide variety of expertise - and a whole lot of heart - to her services. You can connect with Michael on her website - letspurify.energy - and her podcast - The Let's Purify! Podcast. You can also sign up for Michael's email list on the Home Page of her website. When you do, you'll receive her free giveaway: 15 Clarity-Boosting Questions for Decluttering and Purifying LINKS Website: letspurify.energy Podcast: The Let's Purify! Podcast - website link: https://letspurify.energy/podcast/ iTunes link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-lets-purify-podcast/id1428645349?mt=2 Email: michael@letspurify.energy Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Marie Kondo The life Changing Magic of tidying up Netflix: Tidying Up with Marie Kondo To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 32 TITLE Do Therapists Have Therapists? GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW There are misconceptions about what therapy is, and clients often wonder if therapists really care about their clients or is it because the therapist is getting paid. Can a friend or partner act as a therapist? 50% of clients in therapy are Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), and Dr. Elaine Aron’s research shows that HSPs have better outcomes in therapy than non-HSPs. I also share my own experiences being in therapy. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To find a Highly Sensitive Knowledgeable therapist—https://hsperson.com Psychotherapy and the Highly Sensitive Person Dr. Elaine Aron Big Magic Elizabeth Gilbert To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 014 TITLE What Exactly Is a Highly Sensitive Person, co-hosted with Matthew Morgan, LPCC GUEST Matthew Morgan, LPCC EPISODE OVERVIEW We talk about the 4 Core Characteristics that encompass being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP); how our culture views sensitivity; how to tease out our superpowers; the correlation between depression, anxiety and being a Highly Sensitive Person. Why being an HSP is genetically a survival strategy and how this trait has been identified in over 100 animal species. How to deal with overstimulation and overwhelm and ways to cope and manage. The 5 things HSPs need. All the data in this episode is based on the research by Dr. Elaine Aron who initially researched the trait, then named it. HIGHLIGHTS 4 Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) D-O-E-S Depth of processing Overarousability & Overstimulation Emotional Responsiveness/Empathy Sensory Sensitivity Being an HSP is an innate trait 30% of HSPs are extroverts; 70% are introverts High Sensation Seekers (HSS) Inherent problem with being an HSP is being easily overstimulated How to cope What is good self-care Sleep and the HSP 5 Things HSPs need Believe the trait is real Reframe the past Heal traumas Don’t live like the other 80% Surround yourself with other HSPs Mirror Neurons Differential Susceptibility BIO Matthew E. Morgan has run the gamut of careers: starting out as a youth minister after earning his BA in Biblical Studies and Pastoral Ministries, he also taught high school while earning his Master of Arts degree in Professional Counseling from Liberty University in Virginia. He has dedicated his life to helping families recover or reconnect. Matthew has been married for over 20 years. After 13 years of struggling with infertility as a couple, they welcomed their son – a very unexpected blessing. When not spending time with his family, Matthew enjoys writing, gardening, and gaming. LINKS http://covenantfamilywellness.com/about-cfw/ https://www.facebook.com/ourcfw/ Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ Susan Cain Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking Movie—Inside Out To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 13 TITLE Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja GUEST Megghan Thompson, LCPC EPISODE OVERVIEW Parenting a Highly Sensitive Child (HSC) can be challenging—especially if your child has meltdowns. Megghan talks about the Shame Meltdown Cycle; What works to raise an HSC; how to avoid sending the message to your child that that they are wrong; how to communicate with your HSC to strengthen your relationship, and effective ways to communicate with your child to build a solid relationship and mirror your child’s strengths. We talk about the challenges that external validation (reward/sticker programs) pose as well as ways to avoid communicating in a way that increases shame and perfectionism. highlights DBT—Dialetctical Behavioral Therapy Vantage Sensitivity—when parents change how they parent, the Highly Sensitive Child (HSC) will benefit more than a non-HSC, and the HSC will feel better about themselves. The HSC will thrive and do much better and will respond faster than a non HSC. Differential Susceptibility—Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) suffer more in highly negative environments compared to non HSPs. The opposite is also true in the HSPs benefit more in highly positive environments than non HSPs. HSPs/HSCs also notice more positive things in positive environments A little bit of positivity can give an HSP hope, but if an HSC is having frequent meltdowns, they end up feeling incapable and say things like, “You guys would be better off without me.” Or “I wish I was in a different family.” “I wish I were dead.” For children, a little bit of positivity goes a long way Traditional parenting says it’s the child that needs to learn skills, but Megghan has learned that when the family changes the environment and how they parent, everyone benefits The HSC changes how he/she feels about himself/herself when the parents change the environment Shame can be pervasive for HSCs and HSPs Shame Meltdown Cycle— The HSC feels shame—I’m a bad kid; I didn’t do it fast enough or good enough This is followed by having big feelings—they are told not to worry They learn to hide their emotions, internalize, or think there is something wrong with them What does the HSC do with these feelings—they learn to stuff, bottle or deny their feelings Eventually the child explodes They are given a consequence, but there is no repair work; no tools taught, the family is still not talking about feelings or validating the HSC’s feelings so the cycle repeats itself Don’t tell your child not to worry! It’s really important to validate their feelings! BIO Megghan Thompson is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, Registered Play Therapist-Supervisor and Parent Coach who has specialized in working with Highly Sensitive Children and their parents for a decade. She helps parents eliminate daily meltdowns in as little as 8 weeks without giving in or doing a complete overhaul of their household, and strengthen the relationship with their child in the process. Growing up with a Highly Sensitive sister, she also has firsthand experience of the struggles families face when they don't understand the needs of Highly Sensitive Children. She has extensive training and experience working with sensitive teens who engage in self-harmful and life-threatening behaviors, and has made it her mission to build an army of ninja parents of Highly Sensitive Children to prevent this from happening for other sensitive kids and their families. She owns a group practice in Mount Airy, Maryland that specializes in treating Highly Sensitive Children, teens, and their families. You can find her on Facebook through her group: Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja, and a link to her free training for parents of HSCs will be in the show notes. LINKS Parent Your Highly Sensitive Child Like a Ninja Facebook Group: https://goo.gl/yTre1h Free Parent Training: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/p/5steps Schedule a Free Consultation: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/p/talk Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 31 TITLE Afterthoughts about Episode 012 on Relationships GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Reflections about the episode where I talk about conflict I had in a relationship. Episode 012 was a vulnerable episode for me to release, and it included audio that I recorded after having a very uncomfortable conversation with a long time friend about the changes in our relationship. I was reactive and angry (and upset) when I recorded that conversation. I’ve received amazing feedback from that episode from therapists and non-therapists about how powerful that episode was. Some people said they had shame due their own struggles in their relationships, and others said it felt really validating to see struggle in the moment. I found an additional recording I made after difficult phone call, and I add my own thoughts as well. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 12 TITLE How To Navigate Challenges in Relationships GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Navigating conflict and having competing needs in relationships can be difficult. How do we evaluate if our friendships are meeting our needs? I provide criteria that may be helpful when evaluating relationships and compatibility. What do we do when there is a stressor in a relationship, and it causes a breakdown in the relationship? We aren’t often taught how to choose relationships; what to do when our needs aren’t getting met, and as Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs), we tend to be loyal (sometimes to a fault), and we feel guilty renegotiating relationships, or leaving relationships when they don’t work for us anymore. I provide information to Dr. Elaine Aron’s website if you’re curious to see if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice, and sees clients who live in California via online therapy. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. HIGHLIGHTS Sometimes relationships work until there is a stressor, and the relationship (or the skills that one or both of the individuals have) cannot tolerate the stressor, and this can cause a relationship to decline or end Values to check for in relationships Depth of processing Similar interests Does the person have the capacity to manage intense feelings? What is their emotional literacy (emotional intelligence) are they able to identify their feelings Are they introspective Do they have insight Into their own behavior Into their triggers Can they handle when there is conflict Can they handle when there are competing needs How vulnerable are they willing to be How much time do they want to spend together in the relationship How available are they Are they dependable Can you count on them when you need them LINKS Dr. Elaine Aron’s website— https://hsperson.com/ HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode 30 TITLE The Importance of Communication—Especially Around the Holidays GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW Expectations and disappointments around the holidays are pretty common. It’s important that we name what’s going on and find ways to work through the messy stuff. We can love parts of the holidays AND feel stressed. Both can exist. There are also many simples ways we can take care of ourselves with little time and resources. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE 011 TITLE I’ve been high achieving, and I’ve been reinforced for that; to be moderately achieving felt like I’d lost a piece of my identity GUEST Allison Puryear, EPISODE OVERVIEW Allison talks about having to slow down for health reasons and how this impacted her sense of worth and value. What do you do when you’re a striver and you’re used to pushing through? How to set up structure to support having more balance. We talk about being in the sandwich (or panini) generation, where you’re getting “pressed” from both generations. How to manage caring for, and attending to parents and children and managing medical appointments, disappointing news, and taking care of yourself. Allison utilizes her DBT, ACT, CBT skills to manage high stress levels. We talk about how to see if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person, and we talk about that 30% of HSPs are extroverts and 70% are introverts. Jaquelyn Strickland has written an article on being an HS Extrovert. We review the 4 traits of Highly Sensitive People (DOES)—Depth of Processing, Overarousal/overstimulation, Emotional responsiveness/empathy and Sensory Sensitivity. WE talk about courage and vulnerability and Brene Brown’s work. We also talk about Allison’s guest appearance on Lauren Selfridge’s podcast This Is Not What I Ordered. BIO Allison Puryear is an LCSW with a nearly diagnosable obsession with business development. She has started practices in three different states and wants you to know that building a private practice is shockingly doable when you have a plan and support. She teaches everything you need to know about building a private practice in the Abundance Party, where you can get practice-building help for the cost of a copay. You can download a free private practice checklist to make sure you have your ducks in a row, listen in on consultations and interviews on the Abundant Practice Podcast, and hop into the free Facebook Group full of over 13,000 other clinicians in private practice. Allison is all about helping you gain the confidence and tools you need to succeed. HIGHLIGHTS 4 Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) D-O-E-S Depth of processing Overarousability /Overstimulation Emotional Responsiveness/Empathy Sensory Sensitivity Monthly check-in asking What is important to me? My health Managing stress levels (which is a trigger for poor health) Making sleep a priority Family Business It’s easy to use scheduling as a way to avoid feelings Feel the feeling, AND look at the schedule What are the things that are important (paper and action) Does your schedule reflect your values? Leave computer at home No work apps on phone QUOTES My worth doesn’t lie in what I create I had to sit with the feeling that people are disappointed that I’m only putting out one piece of content now instead of four. What if people are let down by the shift? What does that mean about me? It doesn’t mean anything, what somebody else thinks about me. For my whole life I’ve been high achieving and I’ve been reinforced for that To be moderately achieving felt like I’d lost a piece of my identity I was driving myself too hard for something people weren’t even asking for I would love to be one of those people who learns from others’ mistakes, but most of the time I have to fail on my own I have this rule—If it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a no You can have frustration tolerance and be tough and handle what’s thrown at you, AND be highly sensitive LINKS https://abundancepracticebuilding.com/ https://abundanceparty.com/join-now Allison’s guest appearance on the podcast This Is Not What I Ordered with Lauren Selfridge-- http://thisisnotwhatiordered.libsyn.com/27-entrepreneurship-chronic-illness-with-allison-puryear Dr. Elaine Aron’s website—https://hsperson.com HSP Self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ HSP Child self-test-- https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jaquelyn Strickland, LPC-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE 010 TITLE Healing Takes Place When We Are In Connection With Others GUEST Justine Froelker, LPC, author, speaker, Dare to Lead Facilitator EPISODE OVERVIEW Courageously living Brene Brown’s work as a Certified Dare To Lead Facilitator, Justine talks about vulnerability, shame and how we can find healing in connection. Justine shares about being a grieving mother and miscarriage, and how she chooses to see the gifts in everything. She talks about the 6 ways we avoid feelings (based on Brene Brown’s work), and not taking things personally (based on The Four Agreements). We talk about how this impacts the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), and Dr. Elaine Aron’s work. Justine has raised Monarch Butterflies since they are near extinction, and she talks about the awe of watching the transformation. Justine has written 4 books; she has done 2 Ted Talks, and is also certified to teach Brene Brown’s The Daring Way (in addition to Dare to Lead). BIO Full of grit and grace,Justine Froelker uses her fiery passion, the occasional curse word, and her witty humor to share her vulnerability and truth to light up the world. Justine is an advocate for speaking about shame and learning to thrive when life doesn't turn out how you hoped, dreamed, or even planned that it would. Justine is a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Certified Dare to Lead™ Facilitator (based on the research of Dr. Brené Brown) with over 19 years of mental health experience, speaker, and author. She is the author of her best-selling books,Ever Upward and The Mother of Second Chances and recently gave two TEDx talks. Justine currently lives in Saint Louis with her husband, Chad, and their three dogs. She enjoys her childfull life by spending time with friends and family, practicing creative self-care, laughing (many times at herself) and building butterfly gardens on her acre of land, which has made her an accidental butterfly farmer. HIGHLIGHTS Shame (as defined by Brene Brown—A deeply painful feeling of being unworthy of love and belonging Shame—that feeling of “not enoughness” The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz Be Impeccable with your Word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love. Don’t Take Anything Personally Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. Don’t Make Assumptions Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life. Always Do Your Best Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret. We are in angst when we don’t get curious Six ways we hurl Chandeliering—we stuff and stuff and stuff our feelings until we explode (rage, cry, freak out) at the smallest things Bouncing Hurt—anger, blame and avoiding Stockpiler—we stuff and stuff and stuff—the body keeps score, so they get sick, insomnia, depression, anxiety, stomach pain Numbers—offload the pain by taking anything (perfectionism, sleeping, sex, alcohol, eating, Netflix, food, work) Umbridge—someone who’s not integrated—our light and dark side. Will say I love you and then will say I hate you High Centered—You’ve lived this life a little. You’ve experienced vulnerability, you’re stuck. QUOTES None of us have a life that turned out as we had hoped, dreamed or planned We all have trauma, losses and tragedies; I call this grief We all have shame stories that center from—I’m not enough; I’m not deserving; I’m unworthy Those traumas, losses and tragedies also tell us we’re not enough Most of us didn’t grow up in homes where we were encouraged to get curious about our emotions None of us like to talk about shame, but the less we talk about it, the more we have it, or the more it runs our lives If you’re not learning how vulnerability functions in your life, it’s going to rule your life Healing will never ever take place in disconnection If we are not showing up and living our lives in an authentic and vulnerable way, there is no connection We all yearn to be seen and known and loved What is one thing you can do differently today to be happier and healthier? I am a forever grieving mother, and I choose to see the gifts in everything You are not too much; you’re not too dramatic. You’re just right, and it is that part of you that will help so many people. LINKS www.instagram.com/justinefroelker www.youtube.com/justinefroelker www.facebook.com/justine.froelker The 4 Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz-- http://www.toltecspirit.com/ Rachel Hollis Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies about Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be Justine Froelker Ever Upward: Overcoming the Lifelong Losses of Infertility to Define Your Own Happy Ending Taking Flight: An Ever Upward(tm) Coloring Journal The Mother of Second Chances: The Struggle Bus of Rewriting My Story of Infertility and Loss The Complicated Gray: A Big Story of Resilient Redemption Ted Talks Justine Froelker The Permission of the “And” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UjzHTjHEqg The Donut Effect: Owning our Stories https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLTl3l6YE6o Brene Brown The Gifts of Imperfection, Rising Strong, Ted Talks Brene Brown The Power of Vulnerability https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability?language=en Listening to Shame https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame/transcript?language=en To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE 009 TITLE Developing Empathy Guided Me To Hear Myself GUEST Timothy Wienecke, MP, LPC, LAC EPISODE OVERVIEW The term Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) was charged and heavy for Tim. He talks about violence against women; interpersonal violence, feminism, learning to have empathy; the ways men are taught to express only anger or happiness and they have no emotional vocabulary. Tim works with men, and he has a podcast that is primarily for men called Stories and Lessons. Highlights 4 Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) D-O-E-S Depth of processing Overarousability & Overstimulation Emotional Responsiveness/Empathy Sensory Sensitivity Learning the skills of how to develop empathy and listen guided me to hear myself I don’t think that your empathy and your explorations happens without community Empathy is a skill that can be developed Men are sexualized to only feel anger BIO I have spent the last two decades learning with and helping people navigate the hard times life throws at us. I have served as an advocate, representative, Airman, Sergeant, mentor, organizer, educator, and counselor. I will use my experience, passion, and education to empower you with the skills and knowledge needed to find the best way forward. LINKS Tim Wienecke website & podcast--https://empoweredchangece.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron— https://hsperson.com/ Highly Sensitive Person Self Test https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Highly Sensitive Child Test https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-child-test/ Dr. Ted Zeff— http://www.drtedzeff.com/ Feelings Wheel-- https://www.simplemost.com/feeling-wheel-will-help-better-describe-emotions/ Jackson Katz Ted Talk—Violence Against Women—It’s a Man’s Issue https://www.ted.com/talks/jackson_katz_violence_against_women_it_s_a_men_s_issue?language=en Alan Alda If I Understood You Would I Have This Look On My Face? Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
The infection in my son's foot got worse, and he was hospitalized. At the same time, my mom's neurologist said it was emergent that I bring her in to see him (and I told him my son had just been hospitalized and could we see him at the regularly scheduled appointment on Monday). Talk about feeling pulled and having to handle a lot of information. I talk about my hypervigilance, and how I communicated to attempt to get more support. Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Instagram--Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
My son got sick at college, and told us he wanted to come home, but we didn't realize how sick he was, and we told him to go to Health Services the following day. His roommate called us late that evening and told us our son needed to go the hospital. How do you teach your kidults to communicate that they are really ill? How to you teach them how to communicate their symptoms? I also talk about the dilemma when we haven't taught our kids how to negotiate when we say no, and we're not hearing their needs. If anyone is caring for children and an adult, I talk about the mental load of caring for two different generations and how as a Sensitive, it impacts me. Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Instagram--Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 8 TITLE Because You are Sensitive, It Leads You To Be Creative GUEST Rachel Moore, LMFT EPISODE OVERVIEW Many Sensitive’s are creative, but don’t consider themselves to be creative. We talk about the different ways that creativity shows up in our lives. There is a false belief that trauma is the origin of creativity, but Rachel asked Gabor Mate about this and his response to her dispels that myth. Sensitivity is what makes you creative; it is a function of your being. We talk about Julia Cameron and her book The Artist’s Way, and Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic and her podcast Magic Lessons. We also talk about Brene Brown and the origin of courage. We talk about creativity and the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) and Dr. Elaine Aron's work. BIO Rachel Moore, LMFT, earned a bachelor's degree in Creative Writing from The College of Idaho in 1996. She was a newspaper copy editor for 14 years, including being awarded the Pulitzer Prize in 2006 along with her colleagues at the San Diego Union-Tribune. Rachel is also an experienced singer, having performed on several stages around San Diego. She shifted careers and earned her master's degree in Marriage & Family Therapy in 2013. After completing her post-grad internships, including at hospice and private practice, Rachel is now a Licensed MFT. The focus of her practice is to help writers, artists, and musicians overcome creative anxiety and fulfill their dreams. Rachel also has completed Basic Training for EMDR therapy and is currently seeking certification. LINKS Website— https://www.rachelmoorecounseling.com/ Sparkles Podcast--https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/sparkles-podcast/id1356954034?mt=2 Dr. Gabor Mate--https://drgabormate.com/ Elizabeth Gilbert—book Big Magic Elizabeth Gilbert—podcast https://www.elizabethgilbert.com/magic-lessons/ Julia Cameron—book The Artist’s Way Julia Cameron—podcast https://soundcloud.com/james-nav/the-artists-way-a-podcast-with-julia-cameron Brene Brown--https://brenebrown.com/ Dr. Elaine Aron—self-test https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Instagram--Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 26 TITLE Everyone Gets to Own Their Awesome! PLUS exclusive meditation just for our listeners! GUEST Chel Hamilton EPISODE OVERVIEW We talk a lot about play and inhibition, and I ask Chel how do we take those first steps when we want to let go, but we’re really scared. The interview takes an unexpected turn when Chel asks me something, and I get tearful, and have a pretty big insight! I was NOT expecting this. The is so much freedom and joy on the other side of letting go of fear and inhibition and we talk about how to get there. This leads to a conversation about the importance of community, support, validation and knowing that you’re not alone as a sensitive. I wonder about the connection between childhood wounding and our preferred love language because I can see a direct correlation since my preferred love languages are Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. Chel talks about the benefits of meditation and silent meditation for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) as well as hypnosis. Guided meditation can be really helpful when you’re having feelings of overwhelm, stress, overstimulation because your body and mind will engage your relaxation response—your parasympathetic system, which is going to soothe your entire system, which will also create more calm for you, which also improves our emotional responses. Chel ends with talking about the quote Brene Brown uses about The Man in the Arena by Teddy Roosevelt and how to focus on feedback from those that are actually in the arena doing the work. BIO As a certified Clinical Hypnotherapist in practice for over a decade, and over 20 years of working with addicts and alcoholics, Chel has helped thousands of people let go of habits and thought patterns, and re-design their lives for more joy, freedom, and confidence. Through her guided meditation podcast “Meditation Minis” (with over 12 million downloads) she has helped people create more calmer, clearer, and happier lives. Her mission is to be an agent of change of powerful, positive change for the planet, and her passion is to that light that sparks in people’s eyes when that change occurs. HIGHLIGHTS Silent Meditation or focal point meditation (when you focus on your breath, or an object or a word) is good for training your brain to focus, and letting go of distractions. It can also be good for mindfulness, which is the practice of noticing what you’re thinking and feeling in the moment because you no longer become distracted by those things Guided Meditation is closer to hypnosis. It can cause focus to increase, but it also reprograms the brain to have different reactions What happens with guided meditation or hypnosis is that your body is in a trance-like way your body and mind starts having difficulty differentiating between reality and what you’re picturing. This is the power of imagination and visualization. Hypnosis has more direct suggestions, so it’s similar to doing a guided meditation, but it often focuses on literally changing habits QUOTES Girl! There is only one of you in the Universe! Everyone gets to own their awesome! The more you own your awesome; it gives others permission to own their awesome I want to renew my sense of play in life and set aside perfection I think everybody gets to do a happy dance much more frequently than we typically do As a Highly Sensitive Person, it’s important that we do bring more play in If we’re going to feel all the feels…why can’t feel all the outrageously positive feels too? We get to choose what we believe Beliefs that are nourishing to us, we get to choose to have more of, and beliefs that are depleting to us, we get to acknowledge and set aside(ren)], and party with them Most of what we choose to take as truth, are actually beliefs we choose to believe All of this is for play and exploration, and adventure and fun, and I get to create more of that I’m talking about incorporating play and fun into what we’re already up to. Even in a more powerful way In those times when you are feeling overwhelmed, and/or are in a place of doubt or dread, there is so much power in just acknowledging where you are at, and taking 3 deep breaths LINKS Where to find Chel Hamilton-- https://audioboom.com/channel/meditation-minis-podcast APPLE PODCASTS: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/id963597166/ SPOTIFIY: https://open.spotify.com/show/4bSTeVDsXWKQCRptxuZnVQ How weird are you? JP Sears--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaPjy7FB254 Saying YES! to your Weirdness | JP Sears | TEDxCardiffbytheSea-- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79zra755WgA SHOW PAGE: https://audioboom.com/channel/meditation-minis-podcast APPLE PODCASTS: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/id963597166/ SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/4bSTeVDsXWKQCRptxuZnVQ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
An exclusive meditation made by Chel Hamilton of Meditation Minis just for our listeners, and for those that are Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs). Chel's podcast has over 12 million listeners. Check out her meditations. They're amazing! LINKS Where to find Chel Hamilton-- https://audioboom.com/channel/meditation-minis-podcast APPLE PODCASTS: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/id963597166/ SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/4bSTeVDsXWKQCRptxuZnVQ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 25 TITLE My Son’s Perspective on Sensitivity GUEST Daniel Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I hadn’t really discussed what it means to be a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) with my boys since I found out I was an HSP when they were in high school, so I was curious to see how my son viewed sensitivity. He talks about how sensitivity is viewed when you play sports (he played baseball from Kindergarten through high school). He talks about having to get “tougher skin,” which is when I believe he started to push down some of his sensitivity. BIO Daniel is a freshman at Cal State University Long Beach where he is studying criminology. Daniel is a talented rapper who writes and performs his own songs. He is an amazing graphic designer and photographer. He took all the headshots on my website (and the pic of me podcasting that I use for the podcast). LINKS To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 24 TITLE Working Together and Respecting Different Needs and Expectations GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW After surviving a long 9 days when my kids were home from college with their guests, I talked about how I needed to figure out how to create and maintain balance in Bonus Episode 23 since my boys will be home for a month for winter break. Jacquelyn Strickland, who has been running the Highly Sensitive Person--HSP Gathering Retreats for many years commented on my post encouraging me to rethink my statement to “It will be important for the group [my family] to come up with ways that allow everyone to enjoy each other’s company while also respecting different needs and expectations.” This got me thinking about how I have made my HSP needs my problem instead of seeing that as a family, we need to figure out something that works for everyone. We also came up with the idea of setting up my son in the “North Wing” when he comes home (aka garage!). BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. LINKS Dr. Elaine Aron—www.hsperson.com Jacquely Strickland/HSP Gathering Retreat--http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgathering.htm To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Episode 7 TITLE The 5 Love Languages GUEST Dr. Tom Murray EPISODE OVERVIEW Dr. Tom Murray explains why it’s important to be able to speak your partner’s love language. Most people identify their top 2 love languages. Words of Affirmation-the person needs to hear, “I love you,” and receive compliments. There is a sense that words hold value. This will strengthen the bong to hear that your partner cares deeply about you. Quality Time-giving your partner undivided attention. Spending time together feels comforting and satisfying. Your partner may be bothered if you’re on your phone during these times Receiving Gifts-Receiving tokens of appreciation shows the person that their partner is thinking of them. It’s showing signs of appreciation, and it’s not so much about being materialistic Acts of Service-for these people, actions speak louder than words. They feel loved and cared for when their partner does things that help to make their life easier (washing the car, picking up something on the way home, doing the dishes). Physical Touch—this can be things like holding hands, kissing, public displays of affection, sitting close together. HIGHLIGHTS It’s possible for us to want a certain type of love language to be used with us, and we resent it at the same time Tom believes that it’s really helpful when a partner recognizes that the other partner may be loving them with the love language that is their partner’s preferred love language. If you want to figure out your partner’s love language, you can observe how they respond to other people in their relationships Men, culturally have a harder time acknowledging that they have needs Men need support in allowing themselves to receive in a way that’s meaningful to them When we have parents that don’t provide a rich emotional environment, many times we don’t recognize our needs since it wasn’t modeled for us Improv can be great for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) to help them be less in their heads and more in the moment BIO Dr. Tom Murray, international trainer, educator, and couples and sex therapist, is a widely sought-after expert in the fields of sexuality and intimate relationships. For 15+ years, Murray has worked with everyday folks to embrace their weirdness, shed labels and shame, lean into anxiety, and build better and stronger relationships. Murray's appeared in numerous venues, including the Huffington Post and The Daily Mail, as well as radio, television and podcasts, including the Practice of Being Seen and Shrink Rap Radio. Murray directs a group practice in Greensboro, NC and holds a faculty appointment at Northwestern University’s Family Institute. LINKS Website— https://drtommurray.com/ Self-assessment for the 5 Love Languages-- https://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/ Downloadable self-test-- https://www3.canyons.edu/faculty/rafterm/0%200lli%20loveandloss/Day%20Files/Day%201%20Files/5%20Love%20Languages%20Assessment.pdf Dr. Elaine Aron-- https://hsperson.com/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 23 TITLE How to Care for Ourselves When We are Depleted GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW After having 4 teenagers staying with us for 9 very long days, I talk about how depleted I am, and how challenging it was to be the only Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) who is sensitive to sounds, people and noise in a household of 6. It brought back those old feelings of feeling like I’m a freak and not asserting myself because I felt like I was being too picky. I realize that I need to assert my needs and figure out how to negotiate with others in order to have an environment that works for everyone. I realize that because of this, I haven’t done a very good job of teaching my boys how to be sensitive and considerate of others’ needs. I always made it about me, and I didn’t require them to be more mindful about this. They kids will be back for close to a month over spring break, so it will be important for me come up with some ways to allow myself to maintain peace and balance. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. LINKS Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 22 TITLE When No One Shows Up to the Party, Send Out More Invitations GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I have an weekly online group, and for 2 weeks, I rushed to be there on time, and I was the only one. I felt angry and resentful and disappointed because I count on this group and the connection. For 2 weeks, I cut things short to be on time because I value this group. I realized that I need to add more members to the group (I’ve just been too busy, so I haven’t made it a priority, but my resentment was an indication that I need to take care of myself). HSPs tend to be very loyal, conscientious and committed to what we do. It’s not uncommon for us to overwork and overdo in relationships. If this works for us, there’s no problem, but often we end up feeling resentful or feeling like it’s more important to us than the other person(s). It’s our responsibility to take care of ourselves and our needs. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. LINKS Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
EPISODE Bonus Episode Day 21 TITLE Losing My Sh*t! It’s NOT about the Gravy! GUEST Solo episode—Patricia Young EPISODE OVERVIEW I win the triple crown award for B*tch of the day for Thanksgiving! It was a stressful day filled with noise, overstimulation, too many people, overwhelm and some mishaps. I dropped a handful of swear words with all of my guests present in my home over a gravy mishap. It’s NOT about the gravy. There were stressors leading up, but I shamed my husband (which is totally NOT ok). I also talk about “the bank of mom,” and how when the bank of mom is depleted, you cannot make withdrawals before making some deposits or it impacts our relationship. A friend crowned herself “Victim of the Day,” and my neighbor dropped a whole pie before they left the house. How was your holiday? I’d love to hear all about it! The good, bad and ugly. BIO Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice. Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. LINKS Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail--info@unapologeticallysensitive.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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