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6 episodes with Alexithymia
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3 episodes with Alexithymia
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2 episodes with Alexithymia
Mastering Emotions: The Secret Curve No One Teaches You (Episode 169) Have you ever felt overwhelmed and emotionally numb — like you can't name what you're feeling, let alone express it? Maybe you've relapsed or shut down and thought, “What's wrong with me?” The truth is, it's not about willpower — it's about emotional literacy. In this powerful episode, we unpack the hidden emotional roots of relapse, addiction, and disconnection. You'll learn why so many of us were never taught how to feel, and how that disconnect plays a huge role in mental health and recovery.
If you've ever felt like your partner shuts down when you ask, “How are you feeling?” or you find yourself saying, “I don't know what I'm feeling; I just feel off,” you might be dealing with something deeper than emotional avoidance. You might be dealing with alexithymia. No, it's not a disease. Nobody's broken. But it's real, and it affects your relationships, your mental health, and your ability to connect with yourself. Because if you don't know how to identify or express your emotions, it's going to be hard to have the connections and relationships you want. Today you'll learn exactly what alexithymia is, the science behind it, and my six-step plan to build the skill of knowing what you're feeling so you can create more connection, ease, and joy.____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/why-you-or-your-partner-struggle-to-talk-about-feelings-understanding-alexithymiaGrab my Feelings List: https://abbymedcalf.com/feelingslist Learn how to create and hold healthy, loving boundaries with my book Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries or The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbookWant to feel happier and more connected in your relationship? Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won't Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book____________________________Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast and https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives, where you'll find past episodes.Subscribe today to get my love letter to you! This biweekly reminder will keep you on the path to creating connected, happy relationships (especially the one with yourself!). https://abbymedcalf.comFor more quick tips, subscribe to my YouTube channel: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtubeA great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you've got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shopSay hello on social:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abbymedcalfInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthrivingLinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthrivingYouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Understanding Anhedonia in ADHDBecause of the HIGH activity on my post about this, i am releasing this episode EARLY, SURPRISE DOPAMINE; your are welcome :) IntroductionWelcome back to Authentically ADHD, where we dive deep into topics that matter to those of us navigating life with ADHD. Today, we're exploring something that many of us can relate to, but we may be unaware of it, or are unable to explain it because its not talked about a ton, I heard about it in my new hyperfocus podcast/book by the ADHD adults UK/Unpacking ADHD by James Brown and Alex Connor & mrs AuDHD: and here it is' anhedonia. We will talk about what it is, why we struggle and how it's more than just feeling down—it's a significant challenge that affects how we experience pleasure and joy in our daily lives.Segment 2: So, what exactly is anhedonia? According to neuroscience, it involves dysfunctions in the brain's reward system, particularly affecting the mesolimbic dopamine pathway. This pathway is crucial for experiencing pleasure and motivation. In ADHD, these dysfunctions can lead to a diminished ability to derive pleasure or reward from activities that were once enjoyable. This phenomenon can vary from mild to severe, impacting hobbies, social interactions, and even personal achievements. It's like life loses its vibrant hues, leaving everything in shades of gray.Types of Anhedonia: There are two primary types of anhedonia:Social Anhedonia: Difficulty finding pleasure in social interactions, leading to feelings of disconnection and isolation.Physical Anhedonia: Reduced pleasure from physical sensations, such as taste, touch, or sexual experiencesUnderstanding the ADHD Brain Reward SystemNeuroscience reveals that ADHD is closely linked to dysfunctions in the brain's reward system. Specifically, there's altered activity in the mesolimbic dopamine pathway, which plays a pivotal role in motivation, pleasure, and reinforcement learning. Dopamine, often referred to as the "feel-good" neurotransmitter, is crucial for signaling rewards and motivating behavior.This means that for those of us with ADHD, the experience of pleasure and the motivation to pursue rewarding activities can be fundamentally different. The reward circuits in our brains may not respond as effectively to everyday stimuli, making it challenging to experience and sustain pleasure from tasks and achievements that others find inherently satisfying.ADHD, Alexithymia, and Anhedonia: Exploring the OverlapLet's quickly explore the intersections of ADHD with another mental health disorder, & the intriguing overlap between ADHD, alexithymia and anhedoniaUnderstanding Alexithymia and AnhedoniaAlexithymia refers to difficulties in identifying and expressing emotions. It's common among individuals with ADHD and can complicate emotional experiences, including the ability to recognize and respond to feelings of pleasure—known as anhedonia. Research indicates that these conditions often coexist, influencing how individuals perceive and process both positive and negative emotions.For many of us with ADHD, the combination of alexithymia and anhedonia can create a unique emotional landscape. It may be challenging to articulate our feelings or derive satisfaction from activities that once brought joy. This intersection underscores the complexity of ADHD beyond its core symptoms, impacting our emotional well-being and interpersonal relationships.Neuroscientific Insights[Narration]: Neuroscientific studies suggest that ADHD, alexithymia, and anhedonia share underlying neural mechanisms, particularly involving brain regions associated with emotion regulation and reward processing. Dysfunctions in these areas, such as the prefrontal cortex and limbic system, contribute to difficulties in emotional awareness and the experience of pleasure.[Carmen]: This neural overlap provides a deeper understanding of why individuals with ADHD may struggle with emotional expression and enjoyment. It's not just about behavior—it's rooted in how our brains process and integrate emotional and reward-related information.Impact on Daily LifeIn practical terms, the overlap of alexithymia and anhedonia can manifest in various ways. It may affect our ability to engage fully in social interactions, maintain meaningful relationships, and pursue personal goals with enthusiasm. Recognizing these challenges can empower individuals with ADHD to seek tailored support and strategies that address both emotional awareness and the capacity for experiencing pleasure.By acknowledging these intersections, we can better navigate the complexities of ADHD and cultivate resilience. Whether you're personally navigating these challenges or supporting someone who is, remember that understanding and empathy are key to fostering a supportive environment.The Impact of a Dysfunctional Reward SystemResearch suggests that individuals with ADHD may exhibit reduced dopamine activity in response to rewards, leading to difficulties in maintaining focus, regulating emotions, and experiencing consistent motivation. This can contribute to symptoms like procrastination, impulsivity, and even anhedonia—the diminished ability to feel pleasure.Imagine trying to stay engaged in tasks that don't offer immediate rewards or struggling to feel motivated even when the task is important. These challenges are part of the daily reality for many of us navigating life with ADHD. It's not just about willpower—it's about how our brains process and respond to rewards.Research Insights and Future DirectionsOngoing research aims to deepen our understanding of these neurological processes and explore targeted interventions that could enhance dopamine function in ADHD brains. From behavioral therapies that reinforce positive behaviors to medications that regulate dopamine levels, there's a growing focus on improving the reward system to support better outcomes for individuals with ADHD, and this would be especially useful in the ADHD brain that has strong anhedonia.AD BREAKThe Experience of AnhedoniaPersonally, I've grappled with anhedonia in various ways. It's not just about feeling bored or sad—it's a profound emotional flatness that pervades daily life. I've struggled to find joy in activities I once loved, whether it's painting, reading, or spending time with friends. In social settings, it often feels like I'm going through the motions without truly connecting. Many of you have shared similar experiences, where anhedonia manifests as a loss of interest and pleasure in things that used to bring fulfillment. Let's delve into some real-life experiences to better understand the impact of anhedonia on our lives.Real-Life StrugglesLet's delve into a real-life experience that vividly illustrates the challenges of anhedonia in ADHD.Anonymous Listener Story: "There was a time when I loved painting. It was my escape, my passion. But lately, even picking up a brush feels like a chore. It's not that I don't want to paint—I just can't find that spark anymore. It's incredibly frustrating."This listener's story resonates deeply with the effects of anhedonia. Research indicates that individuals with ADHD may experience anhedonia due to alterations in dopamine regulation, which affects how the brain processes pleasure and reward. Activities that once provided fulfillment, such as painting, can become devoid of joy, leaving individuals feeling disconnected from their passions.This emotional flatness isn't limited to hobbies. It extends into everyday interactions and accomplishments, where even achievements can feel hollow without the emotional reward they once provided. It's a poignant example of how anhedonia can cast a shadow over one's life, altering perceptions of pleasure and dampening the vibrant colors of everyday experiences.Understanding these personal narratives helps us grasp the complexity of anhedonia in ADHD. It's more than just a fleeting mood—it's a significant barrier that affects emotional well-being and overall quality of life.Coping Strategies and InsightsResearch suggests several strategies that can help manage anhedonia. Techniques like mindfulness meditation can potentially stimulate brain regions involved in pleasure and motivation. Additionally, behavioral therapies that focus on goal-setting and gradual exposure to enjoyable activities can help rekindle those moments of joy. Remember, it's about finding what works for you and taking small steps forward.ConclusionToday, we've explored anhedonia through the lens of ADHD, shedding light on a topic that impacts many of us deeply, but is not talked about enough. Whether you're experiencing it firsthand or supporting someone who is, know that you're not alone. Join us next time as we continue to navigate the nuances of life authentically with ADHD. Until next time, stay authentic and we will talk soon.Join Focused: https://ihaveadhdllc.ontralink.com/t?orid=29951&opid=1 This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit carmenauthenticallyadhd.substack.com
Have you ever stopped to think about what connection actually IS? How do you define the multi-faceted thing that we talk about all the time on this podcast? That's what our guest, Dr. Adam Dorsay, is tasked with in this episode. Dr. Dorsay is a licensed psychologist, executive coach to high-achieving adults in Silicon Valley, host of the award-winning podcast, Super Psyched, and presenter of two amazing TEDx Talks. Today he discusses his new book, Super Psyched: Unleash The Power of the Four Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love (which I highly recommend).This interview was so inspiring to me; I think the two of us could have talked for days. One of my biggest personal takeaways is to pay attention to not just my connection with others, but also my connection to the world and to something greater.Listen in as we discuss the four types of connection and how to find the right combination for ourselves. Spoiler alert – it's not a one-size-fits-all.In this episode you'll hear about:What connection is – Dr. Dorsay defines it as an emotional internal response – and the four different typesAnecdotes and practical tips to enhance connection, such as using a "driveway test" to evaluate interactions and employing a "walk-on song" to boost confidenceThe importance of self-connection – including self-awareness and self-love – which is the foundation of all other connectionsSocietal pressure to appear cool and how it can hinder genuine connection (and why we should allow ourselves to experience awe and excitement instead)Alexithymia, the spotlight effect, plus, how we psyche ourselves up for small talkResources & LinksRead Super Psyched by Adam Dorsay, listen to his TEDx Talks, and listen to his podcast, Super Psyched.Check out Dr. Adam Dorsey's book "Super Psyched" and his TEDx talks for further insights on connection.Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
James Dobson has like 4 topics he writes about, so let's talk about masculinity again! Jake and Brooke go through Dobson's book "Straight Talk to Men" published in the year of our Lord Y2K. Surprisingly, Dobson gets a bunch of stuff wrong. Let's find out together!Benny Bingo and the Evangelikids: https://www.theannoyance.com/show/the-evangelikidsReferences:DeAngelis, T. (2001, December 1). Are men emotional mummies? Monitor on Psychology, 32(11). https://www.apa.org/monitor/dec01/mummiesLaoutaris, N. (2024, November 18). Men's Issues and Therapy Techniques. FirstSession.com. https://www.firstsession.com/resources/mens-issues-therapy-techniquesLevant, R. F., Allen, P. A., & Lien, M. C. (2014). Alexithymia in men: How and when do emotional processing deficiencies occur?. Psychology of Men & Masculinity, 15(3), 324.Levant, R. F., Hall, R. J., Williams, C. M., & Hasan, N. T. (2009). Gender differences in alexithymia. Psychology of men & masculinity, 10(3), 190.Liaqat, H., Malik, T. A., & Bilal, A. (2020). Impact of masculinity and normative male alexithymia on interpersonal difficulties in young adult males. Mediterranean Journal of Clinical Psychology, 8(2).London, D. (n.d.) What's Not Normal About Male Normative Alexithymia. ThePsychologyGroup.com. https://thepsychologygroup.com/male-normative-alexithymia/Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):https://uppbeat.io/t/mood-maze/trendsetterLicense code: 9OT2MTBHWWSRZP5S Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Co-Host Kamini Wood (https//mountaintoppodcast.com/wood) My returning guest Kamini Wood is a human potential coach, and commentator on male/female relationships. I invited her feminine self to join me for a down-to-earth discussion about how women tend to define what a 'real man' is to them. Now for sure, as a grown-ass man you definitely will define yourself, whether you like it or not. But...given how masculinity and femininity are the catalysts of sexual attraction, if you'd like to make women crazy about you sexually, it would be a fantastic idea to find out what the consider to be masculine. Well, it turned out to be quite the disruptive conversation, as Kamini went headfirst into talking about how we as men need to be more in tune with our emotional selves. But what's the difference between being 'in our feminine' if we do that vs. staying true to being a real man? Apparently, it's tricky. What does Kamini have to say about the ways women look to men to create true safety and security? Why do so many guys clam up when it's time to say something, and then say that which should have been left unsaid? Is it all in the name of being 'stoic'? How do women tend to feel about men bringing out their 'dark side' in certain situations? What if we've really been beaten down by the pressures of life lately? Should we not burden our significant other with those feelings, or what? Overall, expect a reset from this episode with regard to what women think masculine 'weakness' looks like compared to how we as men tend to view it. Get all the past episodes, show notes, guest pics and more at https://mountaintoppodcast.com === HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE TO GREAT MEN EVERYWHERE === The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. I discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, I'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave a review. As we say here in Texas, I appreciate you!
An episode that lays down the law!Here's what's in store for today's episode: * In today's episode, Matt and Angela sit down with retired judge, late-diagnosed autistic, and host of the Meet My Brain podcast, Susan, also known as The Autistic Woman.* We discuss how the field of law draws many autistic individuals, yet it often requires a high level of masking.* It's our strong sense of fairness and justice that often draws us to law—but when we realize the system isn't always just or fair, it can lead to disappointment and, ultimately, burnout in this career.* We discuss how higher education and academia, including law school, can be challenging for autistic individuals, but we often persevere due to our relentless determination and refusal to give up.* On the other hand, autistic individuals are often drawn to the law field because of its structure and clear rules.* However, our tendency toward black-and-white thinking can sometimes mislead us, as the law often operates in complex gray areas.* That said, certain areas of law do align with this way of thinking—such as working as a prosecutor or specializing in contract law, where rules and interpretations tend to be more clear-cut.* Law also involves one of autistic people's favorite pastimes—research!* Problem-solving and strategic thinking, both strengths for many autistic individuals, can also make us highly effective in the legal field.* Our hosts and Susan delve into the hierarchy within the legal system and explore the role of autism in judicial decision-making.* Autistic individuals often leave the legal field due to burnout, as well as the unpredictability and instability that can arise from differing interpretations of the law.* Finally, we discuss popular autistic-coded lawyer characters and how they reflect the unique experiences of neurodivergent individuals in the legal field.“We unconsciously process so much data. We are in a swirling cauldron of chaos all the time, and just getting rid of this visual clutter is meaningful. There's so many things that we can do as autistic people to live healthier autistic lives. And we don't even know that [some of those] things are options.” - Matt“We [autistic folks], because of our neurology, we don't develop habits - we develop strategies. Neurotypical people do things on autopilot - like wake up, brush your teeth, go for a walk, all this other stuff, but we can't do that. We have systems.” - Matt“When we go nonverbal out of stress, when we don't make eye contact, neurotypicals are led to believe that that's because we're shifty or we're lying. So, our inherent way of being might serve as a disadvantage in a legal system.” - MattDid you enjoy this episode? We explored the intersection of autism and the legal field, discussing the challenges autistic individuals face in law careers, from burnout to navigating the gray areas of the law. Tune in as we dive into the unique experiences of neurodivergent individuals in the legal profession. Share your thoughts in the comments and use #AutisticCultureCatch to connect with us and share your experiences!Show Notes:Listen to our producer Simon's podcast The Neurodivergent ExperienceMy favorite episodes is episodes 33 - Living with Alexithymia and Dyspraxia Go listen to Meet My Autistic Brain - theautistiwoman.comInstagram @anautisticwomanTwitter @anautisticwomanRelated EpisodesStar Trek is AutisticApple is AutisticFollow us on InstagramFind us on Apple Podcasts and SpotifyLearn more about Matt at Matt Lowry, LPPJoin Matt's Autistic Connections Facebook GroupLearn more about Angela at AngelaKingdon.com Angela's social media: Twitter and TikTokOur Autism-affirming merch shop This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.autisticculturepodcast.com/subscribe
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This week we're discussing a neuropsychological condition that prevents individuals from expressing and identifying emotions.We wonder why so many sports have what appears to be an unnecessary dress code, and wonder whether organisers had their priorities right when they allowed smoking and drinking in their events during the 80s whilst insisting the players wore specific clothing.There's also an obese hedgehog who had to be put on a diet to protect him from predators.You can email us at info@grahamlandiwellbeing.co.ukThanks again for listening, we really appreciate it.
60 million Americans are affected by mental health issues. One in five will experience mental health issues within a given year, according to the National Institute of Mental Health. The good news is: you don't have to stay stuck, sad, lonely, frustrated. You don't have to feel useless or lost. The pain of that will pass - and it may pass quicker than you think. I've known Dr. Joan Rosenberg for 15 years. When I am in a rut, or I feel stagnant or stuck, I talk to her. She is a bestselling author and a captivating public speaker, an all around amazing person who is excellent at what she does. Joan offers an essential tool and 4 step framework I think will be beneficial for your entrepreneurial mental health toolkit. The 90-Second Rule: Bodily sensations associated with difficult feelings are often what we try to avoid. But, we can lean into them, accept that it will pass in 90 seconds or less, and then we experience them more fully and move through them.Express Authentic Emotions. Both Dr. Rosenberg and Gay Hendricks stress that suppressing or "transmuting" emotions, such as masking sadness or disappointment with anger, can be detrimental. Gay shares that one of his clients experienced a huge breakthrough when he was able to acknowledge the source of his anger. It takes strength to ask for help and acknowledge limitations. Success is rarely achieved alone. Even the military prioritizes assessing needs and limitations and calling for support when necessary. Embrace vulnerability and build the support systems necessary to go the distance! Not only is Joan a brilliant psychologist, she's a bestselling author, and a captivating public speaker. Her experience and expertise make her Mental Health Framework essential for any entrepreneur. Listen to Big Leap with Gay Hendricks and Joan Rosenberg, PhD. Time Stamps[ 0:00:00-0:00:11]People are experiencing a LOT of stress right now, financial, physical, natural disasters. It's taking a toll on mental health - including members of Mike's family. Mike welcomes Gay back to the podcast after a challenging year of medical issues, including broken bones.[0:02:47-0:12:54]Joan introduces the 90-second rule: feelings are transient and dissipate within 90 seconds. It's the physical sensation we try to avoid, not the breadth of the feeling itself. There is a brilliant connection between the 90-second rule with Gay's book "The Ten Second Miracle," focusing on the importance of understanding and mapping bodily sensations.[0:14:13-0:20:00]Entrepreneurs struggle with change, control, and fear in their businesses.This is connected to risk and also presents a unique struggle with leadership. Joan outlines four steps for an entrepreneurial mental health toolkit: 1) embracing change as a constant, 2) developing emotional flexibility, 3) improving communication skills, and 4) managing risk-taking by addressing the fear of undesired emotional outcomes.[0:20:00-0:35:00]There is a deep connection between handling external change and internal emotional awareness.“Alexithymia," is the difficulty in identifying and articulating emotions. How can awareness and education about alexithymia contribute to better mental health practices in workplaces?Transmuting feelings can hinder your growth. It's important to express authentic emotions.You can break “trauma loops" by facing difficult feelings and acknowledging your needs and limitations. It's GOOD to ask for help. Additional ResourcesRead Dr. Joan Rosenberg's Book, 90 Seconds to a Life You LoveGet on the Early Bird List for The Big Leap Experience!Grab your copy of Mike's new #1 Best Selling Book The Ai Accelerator and don't forget to leave a review!
Episode 135. Today's episode is Part 2 of 2 of my conversation with Becca Gibson. Please make sure to go back and listen to Part 1 first. In this part of the conversation we dive into the good stuff. The ways that therapists and other helpers accidentally cause harm, how to avoid this, and some of the things Becca really wishes people knew about people who have diagnoses of ADHD and Autism. Becca is a therapist who works primarily with high masking, late identified and late diagnosed autistic and ADHD people. Let's dive in! What to Expect in This Episode We cover the following: Some of the many ways that therapists and others can cause harm for people with ADHD and Autism Becca's thoughts on the requirement of a formal diagnosis to confirm ADHD or Autism What therapists can to do avoid this harm What psychodrama is and how it can be therapeutic, particularly for experiences with trauma (including how it brings a somatic component that can be unique compared to other somatic therapies) What psychodrama can look like and how it can be used in individual and group settings Becca's insights into community building, group work and how it can do things that individual work simply cannot Becca's process with openly sharing her ADHD and Autism diagnoses and what went into that decision And so much more! Who is Becca Gibson Becca Gibson, LCSW-C, LICSW, is an Autistic and ADHD independent clinical social worker, as well as the founder and owner of Wired Differently Therapy, a private practice serving clients in the states of Maryland and Massachusetts. After spending years supporting disabled students in public school classrooms, Becca began a career in social work with a specialization helping neurodiverse couples, families, and neurodivergent individuals through a neurodiversity affirming lens. Becca's clinical work focuses on Autistics and ADHDers – especially those who are considered “gifted”, or “twice-exceptional” – and the intersection of LGBTQIA+ identities and neurodivergence. In addition to their work as a therapist, Becca provides professional development training, clinical consultation, and clinical supervision. Definition of Neurodivergent Neurodivergent is an umbrella term. According to Nick Walker, neurodivergent refers to “having a mind that functions in ways which diverge significantly from the dominant societal standards of ‘normal.'” Resources Mentioned YouTube ADHD training delivered by Becca Gibson: https://youtu.be/IcWMwK1aSvg?si=kaRlsD1Ysp8mAXnQ Matt Lowry's information about how he has reframed the DSM diagnostic criteria for autism to be more strengths-based Information on Autistic-Centered Therapy from KindTherapyandWellness.com Autistics are more likely to experience complex trauma, and to identify as alexithymic. Alexithymia doesn't mean you don't feel things, it just means you have trouble identifying how to label these feelings AASPIRE - https://autismandhealth.org/ Information about Psychodrama The Obsessive Joy of Autism book Wanting more support beyond these podcasts? I am currently accepting new therapy clients if you live in one of these 40 states in the US If interested in learning more, including my availability and details about my practice, email me at info@drshawnhondorp.com or call 616-227-0001 Or if you are a therapist of helping professional looking to connect in community and learn more about or experience the IFS model, get on my email list here and/or email me at info@drshawnhondorp.com to introduce yourself! Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider-patient relationship. Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the on...
Tackling subjects like identity, cognitive restructuring and Alexithymia; in today's episode, Dr. K discusses one of your most asked questions- what does it actually take to get a girlfriend? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Episode 134. I am so incredibly grateful for this conversation. I'm especially grateful for Becca's knowledge and openness about their personal and professional experiences in this realm. I'm also so glad I live in a time when therapists can come on a podcast and be open about their personal experiences. What a freaking gift. Becca is a therapist who works primarily with high masking, late identified and late diagnosed autistic and ADHD people. This conversation is a 2-parter, filled with information, resources and interwoven with Becca's story of becoming a therapist and late diagnosis of ADHD and autism. You're going to love it. What to Expect in this Episode We cover the following: The work Becca does with clients, professional trainings and continuing education and how their non-linear path here The ways autism and ADHD are understood now, and how Becca has seen these understanding shift over the past few decades The true definition of neurodivergence What it means that autism is a dynamic disability Why we don't use the term Asperger's syndrome anymore And so much more! (Be sure to tune in next week for Part 2 where we dive into the harm that can be caused by therapists and others to those with Autism and ADHD, and how to avoid this, psychodrama, Becca's other creative joys, and so much more) Who is Becca Gibson Becca Gibson, LCSW-C, LICSW, is an Autistic and ADHD independent clinical social worker, as well as the founder and owner of Wired Differently Therapy, a private practice serving clients in the states of Maryland and Massachusetts. After spending years supporting disabled students in public school classrooms, Becca began a career in social work with a specialization helping neurodiverse couples, families, and neurodivergent individuals through a neurodiversity affirming lens. Becca's clinical work focuses on Autistics and ADHDers – especially those who are considered “gifted”, or “twice-exceptional” – and the intersection of LGBTQIA+ identities and neurodivergence. In addition to their work as a therapist, Becca provides professional development training, clinical consultation, and clinical supervision. Definition of Neurodivergent Neurodivergent is an umbrella term. According to Nick Walker, neurodivergent refers to “having a mind that functions in ways which diverge significantly from the dominant societal standards of ‘normal.'” Resources Mentioned YouTube ADHD training delivered by Becca Gibson: https://youtu.be/IcWMwK1aSvg?si=kaRlsD1Ysp8mAXnQ Matt Lowry's information about how he has reframed the DSM diagnostic criteria for autism to be more strengths-based Information on Autistic-Centered Therapy from KindTherapyandWellness.com Autistics are more likely to experience complex trauma, and to identify as alexithymic. Alexithymia doesn't mean you don't feel things, it just means you have trouble identifying how to label these feelings AASPIRE - https://autismandhealth.org/ Information about Psychodrama The Obsessive Joy of Autism book Wanting more support beyond these podcasts? I am currently accepting new therapy clients if you live in one of these 40 states in the US If interested in learning more, including my availability and details about my practice, email me at info@drshawnhondorp.com or call 616-227-0001 Or if you are a therapist of helping professional looking to connect in community and learn more about or experience the IFS model, get on my email list here and/or email me at info@drshawnhondorp.com to introduce yourself! Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider-patient relationship. Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the online...
Disclaimer: We are not professionals. This podcast is opinioned based and from life experience. This is for entertainment purposes only. Opinions helped by our guests may not reflect our own. But we love a good conversation.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/2-be-better--5828421/support.
Talking points: psychology, depression, These are 3 conditions you may have never heard of before, but based on my experience working with men for 10+ years, they've got a significant presence. They're also under-discussed. (00:00:00) - Dysthymia, aka low-key depression(00:04:25) - Alexithymia, when you can't describe emotions(00:07:06) - Derealization, when nothing feels realFurther Reading-Dysthymia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysthymia-Alexithymia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexithymia-Derealization: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derealization***Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/Heard about attachment but don't know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To AttachmentCheck out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your RelationshipBuild brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they're looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podc
So if, in these unfolding moments, words can't express the turmoil and transcendence within, then perhaps creating something beautiful can. I simply must reconfigure and expand my imagination of the possible.
In this episode, we explore the emotional toll of burnout on healthcare professionals with Dr. Jessi Gold, a psychiatrist and Chief Wellness Officer at the University of Tennessee System. Burnout often manifests as depersonalization—a form of emotional detachment that shields clinicians from the relentless trauma they witness. Dr. Gold delves into how this protective mechanism can lead to emotional numbness, distancing healthcare workers from their patients and even themselves. We discuss the concept of alexithymia, where prolonged detachment causes clinicians to lose touch with their own emotions, making it challenging to process trauma or empathize with patients. Dr. Gold offers practical strategies for overcoming burnout, such as early intervention, therapy, setting emotional boundaries, and advocating for systemic change within healthcare institutions. Tune in to learn how reconnecting with the meaning behind their work can help clinicians rediscover a sense of purpose and resilience in their careers.
Do you feel like you're on your own side? Are you able to speak to yourself with kindness? Or stick up for yourself in front of others? That, my friend, is self-compassion and it can be incredibly hard to do. Dr Em says, "compassion" in Latin translates to “with suffering.” And SELF-compassion is how we relate, reflect and react when our self is suffering. In this episode, Dr Em talks about why cultivating a self-compassionate voice is SO DIFFICULT, but how it's also pivotal in getting us through our darkest moments. And we chat through whether self-compassion needs a re-brand? (Hugh's gunning for self-chop-out, but we're still taking recommendations?) To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/4gdli8B
In this episode, we discuss our experiences living with alexithymia and dyspraxia. We talk about the challenges of expressing emotions due to alexithymia and how it affects our ability to communicate how we are feeling and what accommodations we need to feel comfortable. Plus we discuss our Dyspraxia and how it can affect coordination and communication, can lead to challenges in everyday tasks and leaves you with random bruises!TakeawaysAlexithymia can make it challenging to communicate and be sincere in personal interactions.The experiences of neurodivergent individuals can vary, and it's important to respect and understand these differences.Alexithymia and dyspraxia are lifelong conditions that can be managed but need to be recognised by everyone as disabilities.Having a diagnosis can provide solace and understanding, and it's important to recognize and accept one's neurodivergent traits.Spelling can be challenging for individuals with dyslexia, and it's important to focus on understanding the message rather than nit-picking spelling errors.Our first live show at Autistic Minds Live 2024 Cardiff is fast approaching! It is the Premier FREE to attend event for and by the autistic community. To book your FREE tickets, please visit: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/.../autistic-minds-live...Get an Autism and ADHD assessment in the UK with https://www.rtnmentalhealthsolutions.com/ Use the Discount Code RTN23 when you make your initial enquiry through the RTN website or the website portal.Instagram: @theneurodivergentexperiencepodFacebook: The Neurodivergent ExperienceYouTube: @TheNeurodivergentExperience Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this Vulnerabilitea House, Grace addresses her adolescent self with a simple message - “It wasn't your fault.” Australian of the Year, Next Generation Leader (as voted by Time Magazine), ultra-marathon runner and changer of laws, Grace Tame can't be tamed. Here she discusses the uncomfortable truths of her child sexual abuse, grooming & rape. She shares how survival mode became her new normal while dealing, and continuously recounting, her trauma in the public eye. Talking body, Grace is honest about her struggle with anorexia and the relief (after a whole lot of pain) of a recent endometriosis diagnosis.Ohh and she talks about autism, in the most beautiful unfiltered way! Grace, it was the biggest privilege to have you in the studio. We love you immensely. To see Grace speak live (we implore you to), tickets for her show, Lightening the Load with Grace Tame are available here - https://bit.ly/3MitxTh. To watch the full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/4cMEvLC
Therapists who work with eating disorders often hear stories about the crushing impact of multigenerational criticism about weight, body type, and appearance. Our patients speak to us about the multiple meanings of food, weight, and body shape and about how these meanings are embedded in complex familial and cultural systems. As we listen, we try to understand and emotionally resonate with the deep anguish our patients convey. We are excited to welcome Tom Wooldridge, PsyD, ABPP, FIPA, CEDS-S, who is chair of the psychology department at Golden Gate University, a licensed psychologist, and a psychoanalyst. He authored Understanding Anorexia Nervosa in Males (2016), Psychoanalytic Treatment of Eating Disorders (2018), Eating Disorders (2022), and co-edited Advancing Psychotherapy for the Next Generation. His work has been featured in Newsweek, Slate, and WebMD.
112: Kristal DeSantis is a Texas Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, a Clinically Certified Trauma Professional, Certified Sex Therapy Informed Professional, EMDR trained clinician, and a State of Texas approved Premarital Education Provider. She is the creator of The STRONG model of Relational Therapy and corresponding book, S.T.R.O.N.G.: A Relationship Field Guide for the Modern Man Please note some of the audio for this episode was not saved properly; the episode starts mid-conversation.Timestamps: 2:00 - Defining trauma; EMDR therapy11:00 - Ignoring emotions is illogical17:00 - Belief vs trust22:00 - why are most divorces in the U.S.'s initiated by the woman in the relationship?27:00 - Alexithymia - "phenomenon characterized by significant challenges in recognizing, expressing, sourcing, and describing one's emotions"28:00 - Kristal's definition of a good man: "a man with integrity, self-awareness, and strength of character." Kristal's BookKristal's Website Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Alex sits down with Neurodiversity Consultant, Matt Gupwell, to discuss Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)Topics: 00:00 Trailer01:34 RSD Explained 03:32 The difference between RSD and Emotional Dysregulation 10:38 What are your biggest triggers?11:59 Has RSD interfered with your working relationships?15:35 RSD in relationships 26:46 Long term strategies 32:04 Is it hard for Neurotypicals to understand RSD?33:40 Washing machine of woes37:46 What is Alexithymia?43:25 Theories as to the genesis of RSD45:43 The HALT Theory51:09 Your ADHD item (juggling balls)56:33 How RSD is depicted on social media59:18 The positive side of RSD01:02:24 Closing advice 01:08:46 Your most impulsive thing Visit Matt's website
If you would like to learn more about Mona's support groups, workshops or the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards or Workboook you can check out her website at: www.neurodiverselove.com _________________________________________________ During this episode, Mona has a fantastic conversation with psychologist and author, Jasmine Loo, who is in Melbourne, Australia. Jasmine is the author of the book: "Nurturing Neurodivergence-The Late Identified Adults' Guide to Building Healthy Relationships With Self and Others". The topics discussed include: Vulnerability of neurodivergents in relationships. How difficulties in perspective taking can impact how we think others see the world and lead to relational trauma. How trusting can lead to trauma. Understanding healthy vs unhealthy relationships. Explicit learning may be useful. Needing a role model for healthy relationships. May have cognitive knowledge about many things, but may not be able to apply it. Having the memory, but having a gap applying the information in the future. Temporal myopia. Emotional distance from a painful memory can create a disconnect with emotional urgency and relevance. Toxic relationships may start out good. Gaslighting-makes you question your own sanity. Emotional and psychological abuse. Nuanced elements of relationships. Some cultures glorify certain behaviors that are not healthy. In the media, healthy relationship patterns may be seen as boring. Understanding your strengths and challenges and being able to ask for help when you need it. It may be hard to believe in your strengths, if you've been told how bad you are throughout your life. Traits are not inherently good or bad, however it is important to view them in different contexts. Understanding what can change or can't between different neurotypes. Sensory overload will impact your response or reaction. Being in self protection mode. Knowledge is power. Self understanding and self acceptance go hand in hand. Learn how to fight in healthy ways. Open communication during sensory or emotional overload may lead to meltdown or shutdown. You can't clap with one hand, so both partners need to understand each other. Understanding when you or your partners nervous system is dysregulated. Do not be afraid to hit “pause” in a conversation with your partner. Alexithymia-struggling for your brain to register cues from your body. Looking like you are going from 0-100 very quickly and understanding your body's cues. Having an individual and a relationship sensory toolbox can help you re-regulate yourself and co-regulate with your partner. Understanding when we humanize ourselves it doesn't have to dehumanize someone else. What you each need to feel safe in your relationships. “All emotions are okay although not all behaviors are.” Emotions don't have to dictate behavior. Anger is not our enemy, it is trying to tell us something. The sticky brain and obsessionality-random thoughts or words that may get stuck in our heads. Can make it harder for ND people to move on. Learn to accept and understand the signs and doing “acceptance” work can help move out of “sticky brain” mode. Physical activity can ground you to the present. You can contact Jasmine through her psychology website: www.jasmineloopsychology.com or her author website: www.jasmine-loo.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/neurodiverse-love/message
Alex sits down with clinical neuroscientist, Dr. Miguel Toribio-Mateas!Expect to learn:
Use code SCIGUYS at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual Incogni plan: https://incogni.com/SCIGUYS Alexithymia is the inability to understand or recognise emotions, so this week Noah joins us to talk about his feelings... You can WATCH the podcast over on our YouTube channel Help keep the show running by supporting us on Patreon! If you'd like to see more of us, follow our socials! sciguys.co.uk TikTok Twitter Instagram Facebook If you spot any points that need correcting, head to sciguys.co.uk/corrections Follow the Sci Guys @notcorry / @lukecutforth References & Further Reading https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8456171/ https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-suffolk-64253360 https://neuro.psychiatryonline.org/doi/10.1176/appi.neuropsych.14070169 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6056680/ https://www.britannica.com/science/emotion/The-structure-of-emotions https://www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/what-are-emotions https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7005782/
In this episode, we explore the transformative role of hypnosis and coaching in the journey of recovery from Ongoing Traumatic Relationship Syndrome (OTRS). We delve into the powerful intersection of therapeutic techniques and personal empowerment, offering insights, strategies, and real-life stories of healing. Join us as we uncover how hypnosis and coaching can complement traditional therapies and support individuals affected by OTRS in reclaiming their lives. From addressing trauma and rebuilding self-esteem to fostering resilience and fostering personal growth, we'll explore the multifaceted ways in which these modalities can empower individuals to heal from the wounds of past relationships. If you're seeking guidance, support, and inspiration on your path to OTRS recovery, tune in to this episode "Healing the Wounds." Together, we'll navigate the challenges, celebrate the victories, and embrace the possibilities of a brighter future ahead.
In this episode, we explore the transformative role of hypnosis and coaching in the journey of recovery from Ongoing Traumatic Relationship Syndrome (OTRS). We delve into the powerful intersection of therapeutic techniques and personal empowerment, offering insights, strategies, and real-life stories of healing. Join us as we uncover how hypnosis and coaching can complement traditional therapies and support individuals affected by OTRS in reclaiming their lives. From addressing trauma and rebuilding self-esteem to fostering resilience and fostering personal growth, we'll explore the multifaceted ways in which these modalities can empower individuals to heal from the wounds of past relationships. If you're seeking guidance, support, and inspiration on your path to OTRS recovery, tune in to this episode "Healing the Wounds." Together, we'll navigate the challenges, celebrate the victories, and embrace the possibilities of a brighter future ahead.
Jeffrey Burch received a BA in biology from the University of Oregon in 1975, after which he trained at The Dr. Ida Rolf Institute® in Boulder, Colorado, receiving his Certification as a Rolfer in 1977. Jeffrey Burch received his Rolfing Advanced Certification in 1990, after which he again began studying at the University of Oregon where he received a second BA in Psychology in 1993 and a Master of Science in Counseling Psychology in 1995. His Master's thesis “Alexithymia and Dissociation” explores topics related to psychosomatic conditions. Jeffrey has been a member of the Rolf Institute board of Directors. He served for many years on the Rolf Institute Ethics committee. He founded the International Association of Structural Integrators (IASI) Yearbook journal. He is a member of the Rolf Institute research committee. Jeff's Book – Assessment and Treatment Methods for Manual Therapists: The Most Effective and Efficient Treatment Every Time Get on Jeff's mailing list for upcoming classes at jeffrey@jeffreyburch.com Fascia: What it is and Why it Matters Support BodyTalk on Patreon --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/david-lesondak/message
Dive into an exhilarating episode as we sit down with the dynamic Dr. Jerrod Brown, a renowned professor, researcher, trainer, and consultant, for a riveting conversation on alexithymia. With a unique twist, we explore this fascinating topic through the lens of School Counseling, shedding light on its nuances and impacts in an educational setting. Dr. Brown's insights are not only enlightening but also filled with practical wisdom that promises to captivate and educate. Don't miss out on this engaging dialogue that's bound to leave you inspired and informed. Tune in now and be part of this enlightening journey!
Dive into an exhilarating episode as we sit down with the dynamic Dr. Jerrod Brown, a renowned professor, researcher, trainer, and consultant, for a riveting conversation on alexithymia. Exploring this fascinating topic through the unique lens of School Counseling, we uncover its nuances and impacts in an educational setting. But there's more—this episode is packed with invaluable insights not only for professionals but also for parents and the general public, making complex concepts accessible to all. Dr. Brown's engaging dialogue is filled with practical wisdom, promising an enlightening experience for everyone. Don't miss out on this captivating journey that's bound to inspire and inform listeners from all walks of life. Tune in now and be part of this transformative discussion! Podcast is for thought and entertainment purposes only. Viewer discernment is strongly advised.
In this episode, we delve into the intricacies of Cassandra Syndrome and Ongoing Traumatic Relationship Syndrome (O.T.R.S). Join us as we explore the psychological and emotional toll of feeling unheard and invalidated, feeling like you have to walk on eggshells, and examine the impact on one's mental health and relationships. We uncover the roots of Cassandra Syndrome/OTRS, share personal stories of resilience, and provide practical strategies for individuals navigating this complex experience. Tune in to gain a deeper understanding of how Cassandra Syndrome/OTRS manifests and discover pathways to healing and empowerment.
In this episode, we delve into the intricacies of Cassandra Syndrome and Ongoing Traumatic Relationship Syndrome (O.T.R.S). Join us as we explore the psychological and emotional toll of feeling unheard and invalidated, feeling like you have to walk on eggshells, and examine the impact on one's mental health and relationships. We uncover the roots of Cassandra Syndrome/OTRS, share personal stories of resilience, and provide practical strategies for individuals navigating this complex experience. Tune in to gain a deeper understanding of how Cassandra Syndrome/OTRS manifests and discover pathways to healing and empowerment.
Can someone recover from brain injury? Is football safe enough for kids to play? What is Alexithymia? All these questions and more are answered as Nick Fortino sits with brain rehabilitation specialist, Dawn Neumann. ✨Want to sponsor Psychology Is? Visit https://patreon.com/psychologyis Created by Nick Fortino & Robert Daluz --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/psychologyis/support
This is part 1 of the 3 part series with Emilee and David. Emilee and David have a six year old son who repeatedly says “I don't know” when they try to help their son understand his big emotions. Many parents like Emilee and David want to teach their children how to regulate their emotions and how to understand their emotions. But what happens when what you are doing is not working and actually producing the very opposite results than what you were hoping for. Time stamps:13:10 How children physically express their emotions, and what to do13:55 Name and notice those body sensations and physical actions16:07 Alexithymia: when a child doesn't have the skills to name what they are experiencing18:30 Masking: a survival tactic for social situations22:20 Change from asking questions like "how do you feel?" to making statements about the situation26:45 & 34:07 Social Signaling: what is your child communicating to others28:41 Go below the surface: anger with mean words and an intense physical response is above the surface and disappointment is below the surface30:50 Take the pressure off of the child to express their emotions32:27 Beware of praise and instead, give feedback 35:40 Create a bridge from the behavior to describing the emotion: children may need help finding the words40:50 What to do if your child is masking44:43 Difference between when a child WON'T express emotion versus when they CAN'TResources: AlexithymiaAutism Parenting Magazine's Guide to AlexithymiaChildren's Alexithymia Measure handoutThe Alexithymia Wheel and more resourcesMaskingMasking in Children ExplainedNHS's Guide on "Masking" Behavior in ChildrenPraise vs feedbackThe Psychology of Feedback vs PraiseHow to Give Feedback to Your ChildLeslie-ism: The slower you go, the faster you get there.For a full transcript of this episode and more information about the host visit https://lesliecohenrubury.com/podcasts/ . You can also follow Leslie's work on Facebook and Instagram. Join the conversation with your own questions and parenting experiences.Credits: Is My Child a Monster? is produced by Alletta Cooper, Mia Warren, AJ Moultrié, Camila Salazar, and Leslie Cohen-Rubury. Theme music is by L-Ray Music. Graphics and Website Design by Brien O'Reilly. Transcriptions by Eric Rubury. A special thanks to everyone who contributes their wisdom and support to make this possible.
We've all been there—grappling with the heaviness of unspoken emotions, the kind that gnaws at our relationships and personal peace. Today, we discuss wrestling with the heaviness of unspoken emotions — feelings we suppress, ignore, or fail to recognize. These emotional barriers can create a profound sense of isolation and disconnection from our true selves and those around us. The episode is not merely about understanding the maze of our emotions but also an invitation to create sanctuaries where everyone can safely express their feelings without fear of judgment. It's a journey to self-discovery and emotional liberation — a journey worth taking for anyone seeking to live a more authentic and emotionally fulfilling life.Here's the list of episodes related to today's discussion, and we highly recommend listening to them as well:#196 | One Big Myth About Feelings - https://apple.co/3r1dRfH #244 | Understanding Your Anxious Attachment - https://apple.co/3HbtCFv_______________Connect with Emilia, Bianca & the EVOLVE VENTURES Community:Website: www.evolveventurestech.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/evolveventures/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/EvolveVenturesTech (Public Page)Evolve Ventures Society (Private Facebook Group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/457130589193794 Emilia's IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithemilia/ Emilia's TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithemilia Bianca's IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithbianca/ Bianca's Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithbianca?_t=8gq3wqu4fAx&_r=1 Connect with Emilia & Bianca from Evolve Ventures for FREE: https://bit.ly/3THiEN4Show notes:(4:02) Struggling to express emotions(6:20) Where do you start?(11:31) Having somebody to feel safe enough to start(12:10) Eddie shares his uplifting and empowering experience with the Evolve Ventures Society(13:00) Alexithymia(18:59) Have a safe person and space(22:42) Outro***Leave them a 5-star review if you felt their energy, became inspired, or felt as though value was added to your life in your EVOLUTION.(Stay tuned for this coming Monday's episode!)
Here are few post-diagnosis realizations about alexithymia and identifying possible strategies of support. x Lauren
The word 'misophonia' describes a condition that statistically, 20 per cent of you have: an extreme reaction to certain sounds. "For me, it was a relief to have a word for what I'd been experiencing," says Dr Jane Gregory, author of the new book Sounds Like Misophonia: How to Stop Small Noises from Causing Extreme Reactions, "because I thought for a long time that I was really uptight or maybe a bit controlling over other people, and that that was a problem with my character, as opposed to it actually being a problem with the way that my brain processes sounds." Jane offers advice for handling with misophonia, including some very simple verbal techniques. Find out more about this episode and the topics therein and read the transcriptl at theallusionist.org/misophonia. This episode was produced by me, Helen Zaltzman. Martin Austwick of Neutrino Watch and Song By Song podcasts provides the Allusionist music. Become a member of the Allusioverse at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you get regular livestreams and watchalong parties - AND to hang out with your fellow Allusionauts in our delightful Discord community. You can also sign up for free to receive occasional email reminders about Allusionist stuff. The Allusionist's online home is theallusionist.org. Stay in touch via facebook.com/allusionistshow, instagram.com/allusionistshow, youtube.com/allusionistshow and twitter.com/allusionistshow. Our ad partner is Multitude. If you want me to talk lovingly and winningly about your product or thing on the show in 2024, sponsor an episode: contact Multitude at multitude.productions/ads. This episode is sponsored by: • Wildgrain, the subscription box for sourdough breads, fresh pastas, and artisanal pastries that you can cook from frozen in 25 minutes. Get $30 off your first box, PLUS free croissants in every box, when you start your subscription at Wildgrain.com/allusionist or use promo code ALLUSIONIST at checkout.• Bombas, whose mission is to make the comfiest clothes ever, and match every item sold with an equal item donated. Go to bombas.com/allusionist to get 20% off your first purchase. • Squarespace, your one-stop shop for building and running your online empire. Go to squarespace.com/allusionist for a free 2-week trial, and get 10 percent off your first purchase of a website or domain with the code allusionist. Support the show: http://patreon.com/allusionistSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Join Livia and Laurence for part 2 of their chat on the relationship between neurodivergence and eating disorders. You'll learn about: Executive functioning difficulties and how they effect memory and motivation Co-occurring ADHD and the correlation of higher risk of eating disorders Alexithymia and how it can relate to eating disorders and eating habits Demand avoidance and how it is overlooked or not worked with in eating disorder treatment Providing compassion for underlying autistic traits, from providers to patients and from a patient to themselves Ensuring neurodivergents are allowed sensory coping mechanisms Invaluable advice for treatment providers; whether working with neurodivergent individuals or neurotypicals A harrowing story of an eye-opening and sad experience of neurodivergent discrimination in a treatment center EDNA's website: https://www.edneuroaus.com/ EDNA's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/edneuroaus/ Livia's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livlabelfree Buy my books! https://www.livlabelfreebooks.com Schedule a coaching call: https://www.livlabelfree.com/schedule
This week, we share Rachel's interview with "The Trauma-Informed SLP", Kimberly Neely! Kim and Rachel have a fascinating discussion about some of the neurological and physiological changes caused by traumatic experiences. They also cover the difference between repeated vs chronic trauma, why some people with chronic trauma have trouble with interoception (i.e.. identifying how they feel), the importance of feeling safe, and more! Before the interview, Rachel shares about deciding to create some new materials about self advocacy, including social stories that discuss body parts using core language. She also relates this week's interview to a previous episode with Chloe Rothschild about interoception and autism! Key Ideas this Week:
Welcome to The Nonlinear Library, where we use Text-to-Speech software to convert the best writing from the Rationalist and EA communities into audio. This is: CEARCH's Cause Exploration Contest: Awards, published by Joel Tan (CEARCH) on September 7, 2023 on The Effective Altruism Forum. CEARCH ran our Cause Exploration Contest over the month of July, as part of our search for (a) potentially impactful causes as well as (b) useful methodologies to search for new causes going forward. We would like to thank everyone in the EA and broader philanthropic community for participating. Winning Entries We are pleased to announce the following winning entries: In the category of promising cause areas: Bean soaking, submitted by Nick Laing of OneDay Health. In summary, persuading citizens in sub-Saharan Africa to soak before cooking them (and thus saving on fuel use) may have health, economic and environmental benefits; however, there are some outstanding uncertainties over tractability and why soaking is not already common practice. In the category of useful search methodologies: Brainstorming for solutions that may not have the most impact in the context of solving a single problem, but which may have significant overall impact given the benefits it brings across multiple cause areas; this was submitted by Jeroen De Ryck. The prizes are USD 300 and USD 700 for the cause and search methodology categories respectively. We will be getting in touch with the winners to send them their winnings, though we are of course happy to donate to the charities of their choice if they so prefer. Honourable Mentions We would also light to highlight the following entries that stood out. In the category of promising causes: Modern slavery, submitted by Sam Hilton. Alexithymia, submitted by Bolek Kerous. And in the category of useful search methodologies: A list of seven methods generally focused on taking different moral, political, epistemic and metaphysical perspectives (e.g. consulting the perspective of preference satisfaction; prioritizing causes systematically overlooked by human biases; copying ethical pioneers; consulting non-standard cosmology; consulting different political values; considering ideas that have gone out of fashion; and researching utopia building); this was submitted by David Mears, with input from Amber Dawn Ace. Consulting J-PAL's existing list of RCTed interventions, with the idea being that at lower levels of granularity, we can focus on very targeted interventions that may be very cost-effective but not generally applicable; this was submitted by Sophia Moss. Thanks for listening. To help us out with The Nonlinear Library or to learn more, please visit nonlinear.org
How did Paul develop speech after 7 years of being non-verbal? What visual and speech disorders occur in Autistic people? What is it like to have a visual disorder? Paul Isaacs (@staypuft12) is an autistic public speaker who was late diagnosed with autism and OCD at the age of 24 in 2010. Paul was functionally non-verbal till the age of 11, suffering from a brain injury from cerebral hypoxia before birth. Within this podcast, Paul details his life with visual and speech disorders, and how others can better understand the experience. My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK // Paul's Blog - https://theisaacs22.wordpress.com/ Dbud Noise Cancelling Adjustable Ear Buds (20% OFF with code: THOUGHTYAUTI) - https://dbud.io/thoughtyautipodcast Kicking off the episode, Paul explains his history with Autism and OCD. Diagnosed at the late age of 24 he was gifted with a very positive experience, something not common to many. Paul found a role model in a woman named Donna Williams, who shared many of his experiences in life, recounting her inspiring yet tragic life in great detail. Starting work at 15 due to his parents increasing concern about Paul's isolation in his room, he had a very ego-centric approach to communication with many processing delays. The two bond over their shared confusion and difficulty identifying bullying, gossiping, and gaslighting within the school system and workplace. Non-verbal until age 7, Paul describes the numerous visual and speech disorders he was afflicted with due to brain damage inflicted during a placental abruption and consequent cerebral hypoxia. Doctors originally believed he was blind, but eventually identified a few causes of his social, kinaesthetic, and sensory-sampling behaviours. Paul is hemiplegic, which impacts his visual perception, language, proprioceptive awareness, and some of his motor functionality. His visual agnosia left him unable to register anything he wasn't directly focused on, like extreme tunnel vision... meaning his ability to create word associations to objects in childhood was difficult. In terms of speech, Paul was 80% meaning deaf. The experience was described as perceiving large amounts of fragmented information, and couldn't interpret language as anything but meaningless phonics. His anomic aphasia made it difficult to find words to say, which resulted in him becoming highly echolalic. Paul and Thomas describe their shared difficulty with Alexithymia in childhood and how their feelings manifested as physical illness. Paul describes the idea of mergence, something common in infants who are in a state of sensing, rather than interpretation... this mergence was remarked by Thomas as being eerily similar to goals of meditation and the experience of ego-death many chase. Paul and Thomas do differ in some respects. Thomas describes his default mode network or baseline activity of his brain as being constant and often stressful; Paul doesn't tend to think at all unless baited by OCD or PTSD symptoms. Briefly speaking on his dark past with auditory psychosis and mental illness symptoms, the two have a constructive conversation about internal vs external validation and why autistic people may be viewed as selfish. The importance of forgiveness in its many forms seems to be a common thread between recent podcasts. The two highlight a worrying trend of identifying as a victim of the world and how this can lead to an intense hatred towards neurotypical individuals. Paul ends the episode by giving some valuable and practical information on how to better understand and communicate with those with visual/speech disorders. Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5 Interview me, 1:1 Talk With Thomas, public speaking for events & workplace training - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK
Ron DeSantis diagnosed with Alexithymia by AI psychotherapist
Picture the immense amount of energy invested in analyzing your emotional responses to every social interaction, striving to decipher not only your own feelings but also how the other person perceived the conversation. Or imagine navigating through life with a constant undercurrent of irritability and anxiety, yet lacking a clear understanding of their origin. These experiences only represent a small fraction of what people with alexithymia may experience. Alexithymia, which in simple terms is difficulty identifying and describing emotions, is a trait that is often associated with autism and ADHD, however despite the fact that one-in-ten people in the general population have this trait (not just Autistic people), there are still many misconceptions about what it is, who it really impacts, and how it shapes their experiences and relationships. Dr. Megan Anna Neff, an AuDHD psychologist with alexithymia, states that a lot of things that have been attributed to autism, for example, difficulty with emotion recognition on faces or voice, are actually due to alexithymia, not autism. In this episode of Divergent Conversations, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, talk with guest, Thomas Henley, an Autism consultant, public speaker, workplace trainer, and podcast host of “Thoughty Auti Podcast”, about all things alexithymia. Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode: Understand what alexithymia is, how is it related to autism and ADHD, and some common attributes associated with autism that are strongly linked to alexithymia. Identify the ways that alexithymia affects emotional regulation and the ability to connect with others on a deep emotional level. Learn what strategies and therapeutic approaches individuals with alexithymia can use to help facilitate emotional regulation and deeper connections with others. Alexithymia affects many individuals in the general population, so taking the time to recognize and understand the traits, challenges, and experiences associated with alexithymia, can help facilitate deeper connections with others, self-acceptance, and healthy ways to manage overwhelming emotions and situations. Alexithymia Resources Alexithymia articles on neurodivergent insights: https://neurodivergentinsights.com/blog/category/Alexithymia Alexithymia workbook: https://neurodivergentinsights.com/neurodivergentstore/p/alexithymia-workbook Dr. Neff's Alexithimia Training: https://learn.therasmarts.com/courses/Alexithymia More about our guest, Thomas Henley: My name is Thomas Henley, I'm an Autism consultant, public speaker and workplace trainer running the Worlds Top podcast ‘Thoughty Auti Podcast', all about Autism & Mental Health - independently presented, edited and promoted by my Autistic self. I'm also a Commonwealth/British champion in Taekwondo, Biomedical Sciences (Hons) graduate from UoM, Autistic Model, documentary creator of ‘Aspergers In Society' & ambassador for Anna Kennedy OBE & Born Anxious. I was diagnosed Autistic at 10 years old and later developed severe mental health conditions at the age of 14 due to trauma at Secondary School - Clinical Depression, GAD, Bulimia & multiple Dissociative disorders. Most of my content focuses around the low quality-of-life statistics for autistic people, such as mental health, social isolation, unemployment, education, relationship difficulties & self-harm in all forms. I've delivered this information to the government, leaders in SEN education, and the general public through my outreach and social media work. My passion is to help people, it's my meaning to life, my saviour for helping me stay around. My ultimate goal is to improve things for future generations who may just experience the same awful things I have. My content is informed from many angles. During my time at university, I also studied and researched into Autism, Mental Health, Sociology, Psychology, Socialising, Relationships & Philosophy. I also used to be Special Needs TA, I work alongside charities regularly, talk to researchers, Autistic influencers, authors & parents regularly on my podcast, and currently work full-time for a National Inclusion charity. Check out Thomas' resources and content: Thomas' Website: https://thomashenley.co.uk/ Thoughty Auti Podcast (Spotify): https://open.spotify.com/show/6vjXgCB7Q3FwtQ2YqPjnEV?si=BjFjTN9RRm-mG5r4kmxmVQ Twitter: https://twitter.com/ThomasHenleyUK YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ThomasHenley Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thomashenleyuk/ TikTok (@thomashenleyuk): https://www.tiktok.com/@thomashenleyuk Transcript PATRICK CASALE: Hey, everyone, you're listening to another episode of Divergent Conversations Podcast. I'm your cohost, Patrick Casale, joined today by Dr. Megan Neff, and Thomas Henley, who is the host of the Thoughty Auti Podcast. So, guest number one on our podcast. And Megan and I just released on Friday, and the response has been fantastic, feedback has been fantastic. And we're both overwhelmed as hell, is that right Meg? MEGAN NEFF: Yeah, that's right. We were talking before on air how we're both in scatterbrain today. So, that'll make for a fun conversation or something. PATRICK CASALE: Yep. And I definitely just, like, steamrolled through the intro and didn't even let Megan introduce herself, so sorry. MEGAN NEFF: I know. I was like leaning in too, but actually, I- PATRICK CASALE: Thank God I saw it. I'm sorry for that. Thomas, we appreciate you being here and just making the time. We know you're six hours ahead of me and nine hours ahead of Meg. And I think we're going to talk about alexithymia today. And I think we're also going to talk about whatever the hell is going on in our lives and making us feel so scattered. So, thank you for being here. THOMAS HENLEY: Of course, I think you might have mentioned it, but I wasn't totally aware that I was your first guest on the podcast. So, I'm honored very much, so… PATRICK CASALE: No pressure whatsoever. Megan, alexithymia is a topic that is near and dear to your heart. You talk about it often on your Instagram account, Neurodivergent Insights. And you have tons of resources. So, I would love for you to start us off with why it feels important and why we're talking about that today. MEGAN NEFF: Yeah, yeah. Okay, I'll try to pull thoughts together, cohesion. Here we go. Yeah, so I think it's a really relevant topic to autistic and ADHDers, particularly, just because we tend to be more impacted by it. So, first, just to do my, like, definition of terms, and then go into it, it's actually not a diagnosis. Sometimes people will DM me about like, how do I get diagnosed with this? It's not a diagnosis, it's a personality trait. And it's fairly common. One in 10 people have it. And it's difficulty identifying and describing emotions. So, one in 10 people in the general population have it. Among autistic people, it's about 50% or higher. And then among ADHDers, you know, these studies, there's so much variance, but I've seen, like, between 20 to 45%. And then even those who don't have like, full threshold, they have more alexithymic traits. And this really makes things like emotion regulation, connecting with other people on kind of that deep emotional level a lot more difficult. The other interesting thing about alexithymia is that a lot of things that have been attributed to autism, like difficulty with emotion recognition on faces, or voice, empathy, which autism and empathy is a whole topic, that's huge. All these things, they've done studies, and when they pull out autistic people with alexithymia, and autistic people without alexithymia, autistic people without alexithymia are doing as well as the control group. So, a lot of the things that we've said that's an autistic thing is actually… that's a severe alexithymia thing. So, that, to me, when I read that I was like, this explains why so many people aren't getting diagnosed, for one. For two, when a person is autistic with alexithymia there's some higher support needs around emotional regulation, emotional identification. I actually have alexithymia. Because of my training, I would say I now have pretty mild alexithymia and I've figured out how to adapt to it. But I definitely see how difficulty identifying emotions through my life has led to some hard stuff. So, yeah, that's the clinical definition. Thomas, I'm curious to hear, like, you're really interested in this topic. Where did that curiosity come from? THOMAS HENLEY: I think it's because I have quite a bit of a history with like, emotions. Like, ever since I was very young I was pretty much fascinated by neurotypicals. I was kind of doing, like, the reverse autism specialist thing. I had the fascination of neurotypical people. And I remember from, sort of, early days, sort of, at school, I would look at people around me, people, particularly, during like high school, secondary school age, and they would be doing things with no reason or rhyme to why they're doing it, but they just seemed to have something in their brain that, like, flicked a switch, and then they went, and did something. I now know that, you know, for example, things like dancing, it's not a social display that you're like, "I'm going to do a social display." It's a thing that you do because it feels good, and people feel driven to do things that feel good. And I found that really confusing because I used to analyze the reasons behind a lot of my decision-making. And I think it's, I was reading a book recently, I can't remember the reference, but they were talking about how emotions can be quite a big feed into how we make decisions. So, it could be something as simple as food. You know, you eat something, and then you like, no, you're picking between, like, a cupcake, and like some protein pancakes, and you model eating both of those in your brain, detects how you feel from eating those in that model, and then kind of use your emotions to probably get the cupcakes. So, I think there's a lot of depth to it and a lot of the issues that I had, particularly, in secondary school was emotional dysregulation, a lot of mental health difficulties, but also, not really as much of an ability to notice when my anxiety or my depression was getting worse, and, you know, psychologist's, therapists, they'd give me these anxiety worksheets, but the issue with that is that you first got to know that you're in your anxious [CROSSTALK 00:06:44]. MEGAN NEFF: Exactly, exactly. Yeah, yeah, I talked about that when I do trainings on this of, like, we go from like one, or two, to 10, or at least that's our experience, we're not actually doing that. But we're not picking up, you know, that like emotion thermometer or that stress thermometer, we're not picking up the subtle increase. And so, that's what leads to those big emotional outbursts. They can also look very, like, borderline or bipolar, which is another reason that I think we get misdiagnosed because it's so hard to regulate your emotions if you're not registered, and you're angry, or stressed, or anxious till it's out of 10. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, and then society's kind of perceiving you, and not how you're attending to react to things as well, and that inability to regulate is so challenging in social situations, but it's challenging in a lot of environments like in the workplace, for example. Like, if you're unable to identify your emotions, that can lead to a lot of workplace conflict as well. And I think that's another reason that we see so many neurodiverse people struggling with neurotypical jobs and environments, is just they're not set up to be successful in a lot of ways and they're not set up to be affirmative. THOMAS HENLEY: It's quite key for, like, enforcing boundaries and stuff like because a lot of people they kind of get a… someone says something that makes them upset, or angry, they kind of get a bit of an emotional jolt to kind of be like, "Hey, actually, that's not okay." Whereas, in a lot of cases in my life, and, you know, from talking to other people, it seems that we just kind of take it, and then we go away and think about it, and come back like a week later, a couple of days later like, "Actually, hey, this isn't good." And I think it can sometimes lead a lot of neurotypicals to not really trust, like, our reactions to things in, like, the present. MEGAN NEFF: Yeah, that is so well said. It can cause so much relationship confusion because the person with alexithymia whether you're ADHD, autistic, or neurotypical, like, we need that space to process, I think. So, reflective emotions is when we're bringing in our prefrontal cortex. I think a lot of us overcompensate for the fact that we're not feeling those more in-the-moment fleeting emotions by becoming really good at reflective emotions. But that takes time and space. And often, we can't do that in an emotionally charged space. So, like, if we're having a, for example, emotionally charged conversation with our partner, we're going to have a really hard time accessing our emotions in that moment until we take some space, and especially, if your partner's more anxiously attached, that space is going to feel like abandonment. And this is where I see a lot of relationships kind of go off the rails, is that dance that kicks up around that. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. And I think, you know, you and I are both in the mental health profession. So, I think there's advanced training that goes on behind the scenes, right? Where we're like, okay, now we're starting to identify these emotions, now I'm starting to become more familiar with how I'm feeling, and experiencing, how I'm moving through the world. Not everyone has that luxury, and privilege, and ability to do, so I think it becomes very murky, very confusing. And that's where you start to see a lot of dissociation, and disconnection, and that really frustration, isolation, loneliness paradox that kicks in in social environments. And I think that is so fucking hard for people when it feels so painful to identify what is really happening beneath the surface. MEGAN NEFF: Mm-hmm (affirmative.) THOMAS HENLEY: I think one of the best ways that I found it to like describe what it's like to be electrifying to neurotypicals is like a threshold-related condition. Like, most people, if we put a quantitative number on anxiety levels from like zero to 100, you know, perhaps a lot of neurotypicals they'd be able to tell within the 20 to 50% range that they are at a certain level of anxiety whereas when you're autistic, and you have alexithymia that might be 70, 80, 90%. And a lot of those strategies that we learn to calm ourselves down, I found the most use in like preventative things and like blanket approaches to solving when I was younger, and I didn't really understand it. And it also led to, as he was saying about sort of disassociation, I actually did a lot of reading about it. And it was something that I noticed even when I was very young. And so, I looked into that kind of thing and I was like, "Hey, I have situations in my life where, for some reason, in 10, 15 minutes I feel like a completely different person, I feel differently in my body, I perceive the world differently, I behave differently, I must be a different person." And so, I looked into this dissociative identity disorder, and I was like, "Hey, this is actually what's happening." Because I couldn't feel the emotion. And I had to, like, go through, and just look at all the science, and the terminology, and the philosophy behind different emotions, and really trying to embed that in order to understand it in the future. But I used to have, like, different colors, which, obviously, the colors were related to emotions. But at that time, it just didn't click for me at all. MEGAN NEFF: I think that captures something really important. Yeah, and it's interesting. Like, I don't know what is dissociation, what is alexithymia here, but one thing I notice among autistic people, in general, is a much more, like, fragmented view of self. And so, when you describe that of like, looking into DID… Like, that's actually, I feel, like probably pretty common for a lot of autistic people to look into DID or I'm seeing a lot more about plural systems now because it can be such a fragmented experience when we can't access our emotions, even more so. PATRICK CASALE: Megan, I'm curious about, just in your own life, when you're experiencing alexithymia and kind of the identification, like you're mentioning being fragmented, right? You and I have talked about fragmentation a lot and just feeling so, like there's so many pieces here, and you can always identify or connect them, and how that really is, you know, showing up these days for you, in terms of like, you've built an audience, you've built a presence, you, obviously, have such a wonderful reputation. And I know you and I talk of this off the air about like, when you're feeling really heavy or like when you're really in that space of teaching and researching it can be disconnecting from how you're experiencing day-to-day too. MEGAN NEFF: I actually think I feel the most connected when I'm in my head. And that's part of the problem is it's so hard to be in my body, which I've talked about plenty. So, when I'm in research flow or writing I feel like the most like myself. It's all the other places I occupy that I'm… And right, like that's actually a really common experience with special interests. We often feel most like ourselves when are immersed in our special interest. PATRICK CASALE: Absolutely. MEGAN NEFF: And can access emotions. Like, I see that with my clients, when we start talking about special interests, there's an animation that pops up. Like, we access emotions more easily. Thomas, you were about to say something. THOMAS HENLEY: Yeah, I just find it interesting you're talking about, like, feeling fragmented because before I came across the concept of alexithymia I did a video and like a post called like, My Split Brain. And it was, basically, talking, I found this book called, I think, The Monkey Mind. MEGAN NEFF: Yeah, yes. THOMAS HENLEY: Which is, yeah. And I really- MEGAN NEFF: Go ahead and explain it though because I know what you're talking about, but our listeners don't. THOMAS HENLEY: Yeah, it's like, basically, splitting your brain into, sort of, the higher cognitive kind of prefrontal cortex that uses intellectual things, and logic, and facts, and things to dissect and understand your environment whereas the monkey mind is the emotional brain, like things related to like the amygdala, and drives, and desires, and needs that are important to survival. And the whole book is kind of about framing it as that you do have kind of these two pulling forces. One is like your willpower and your, I guess, more human side. And the other side is like the emotional kind of monkey side. But I found that really interesting. And I felt like it was probably one of the first things that I related to, in terms of thinking about my emotions because I did feel for a long time that I just couldn't, like facts, and dates, and events just seem to be like, ridiculously hard to connect them in my brain. Even if they are apparently clear, the feelings that I have from that event don't feel like they connect with that. And so, I'll got a lot of situations where I've had really bad experience during the day. And then for some reason, I'll just be alone, I feel a bit anxious, and I feel a bit down. Now, why is that happened? And, obviously, I know that something bad's happened in the day, but it just doesn't immediately link. It's like after connecting neuro- MEGAN NEFF: Yeah. THOMAS HENLEY: …pathways together. MEGAN NEFF: Yeah, it's not an automatic process. It's like, okay, I've got to analyze. Yeah, yeah. When I started therapy, like five years ago, one of the things my therapist said to me was like, "You are so like analytical or like, aware." But almost, it wasn't a criticism, but it was a curiosity of like, and it was an interesting moment for me. Like, isn't everyone doing this all day long? Just like analyzing the shit out of their day, trying to figure out why am I feeling this way? And that was a really interesting moment for me because I could tell he was struck by like, how analytical I was about my experience. PATRICK CASALE: It would be nice to know what it would be like to move through the world without analyzing every experience and thing that fucking happens to me, that would be fantastic. It would feel like a yes, maybe, like a pressure relief in a way. But it's just so challenging to move away from that. Like, I have to analyze everything. I'm constantly, like you said, Thomas, can try to connect like, where's this anxious feeling coming from? Oh, yeah, this thing happened to me today, or this thing happened yesterday. And now it's creating these feelings that I can't always associate together. And then, ultimately, it leaves you a bit confused because you can recognize the somatic sensation in your body of like, "I'm feeling anxious." Where is this coming from? Like, why is this feeling so intense right now? Oh, yeah, this thing happened six hours ago. That should create anxiety, but in the moment was not able to connect the dots. THOMAS HENLEY: And that is quite a heavy tendency for, I think, autistic, maybe even neurodivergents as well, but I can only speak from the autistics' perspective, that it is kind of hard to make those… God my brains gone. MEGAN NEFF: Oh, we get it. THOMAS HENLEY: What were you saying, Patrick? PATRICK CASALE: Oh, just connecting those dots, you know, and those associations where- THOMAS HENLEY: Yes. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah. THOMAS HENLEY: It's gone on me, sorry. PATRICK CASALE: That's okay. I think, you know, this is actually nice to see while we're all sitting here because the three of us mentioned we're all feeling a bit scattered today. And it's interesting, like, we're having a very real experience around this conversation. And I can see Megan being very deep in thought when I'm talking, and I'm paying attention to that at my peripheral. But, you know, I think, there's a paradox for me as a autistic ADHDer where association with emotion, and feeling and trying to name it and define it versus like, constant sensory seeking and stimulation seeking, and like, really trying to seek out that intensity as well, and then trying to like connect the dots with intensity seeking to soothe the anxiety in your body. It's really an interesting experience for me. And soccer has been so helpful. Thomas, I know you're really into fitness for that, probably, a similar reason. And [CROSSTALK 00:21:37]- THOMAS HENLEY: … proprioceptive stimming. PATRICK CASALE: I know, I know. I was talking to Megan about proprioceptive stim the other day and needing to have my, like soul, and body crushed back into my body, and how often I feel the need for that. I asked my wife to do that the other day, and she looked at me, and was like, "The fuck are you talking about?" And I was like, "I just need you to do it. Like, I'll explain it to you later. But I need you to do that." And I think that's a very, very typical experience for me on almost a daily basis. THOMAS HENLEY: I think that there is a tendency sometimes… I've remembered what I was going to say. I think that there's a tendency sometimes with autistic people that we need to know the reasons for things. And sometimes in a lot of cases you don't always need to now. Like, it could be useful in some cases to know why you're feeling a certain way. And sometimes it might just be, you know, good to just chalk it up to possible stresses, like mental health or so, where it plays things being too productive, not getting enough rest due to special interests. And I think sometimes getting in my head about how I'm feeling stops me from like focusing on other things that I'm doing, that are helping with my stress, and my emotions. So, unless I'm feeling sort of a deep, aching issue, or that, you know, it's perhaps related to a relationship or a friendship, or if I'm having quite bad mental health crises or lows, then it's useful for me to go for and pick that. So, there's that. And I also think that creator autism from the inside, we were talking about alexithymia on my podcast, and we were saying that can be quite a large burden for using your, like, higher cognitive brain to do things that are quite simple, or quick, or emotional based like social communication. So, it really made me kind of think about, you know, like, how much effort am I putting into situations that don't really matter in the grand scheme of things? That kind of mentality. MEGAN NEFF: I really like how you're balancing kind of the autistic need to know because I agree that's super regulated when I can pinpoint to like, oh, this is why I'm feeling that way. I say it calms my amygdala down, just calms everything down. THOMAS HENLEY: Fixated at the core. MEGAN NEFF: But balancing out... What did you say? THOMAS HENLEY: Fixated at the core. MEGAN NEFF: Yes, yes. THOMAS HENLEY: It's the reason that everything will be okay. It's like when you get really stressed about finishing a task on the computer and the programs aren't working. It's like, really easy to get that done, and then, you'll be okay whereas sometimes [CROSSTALK 00:24:45]- MEGAN NEFF: Well, I think it's [INDISCERNIBLE 00:24:56] partly because it just produces uncertainty. Like, it's like, okay, I can track why I'm feeling that way. But what I really like is how you balance it with acceptance. For me, in my training to become a psychologist, I probably did a bulk of my training in motor therapy called acceptance commitment therapy or ACT, which is all about kind of accepting our emotions. It doesn't mean we have to like them, but accepting they exist and then asking, "Okay, but how do I continue to move toward what matters to me, to move toward my values?" And that was probably one of the best things for my anxiety, was learning an element of acceptance. It was yes, sometimes I can locate like, okay, my routine's off, this, that's why I'm anxious today. Other times I can't and it is about that, "Okay, how am I going to hold this and live with this and continue to move toward what matters to me and not let it completely derail my day?" THOMAS HENLEY: It's prioritization, I think, the way you put your energy and so… MEGAN NEFF: Yeah. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, I think you make a great point, Thomas, about that because I do think a lot of autistic people are using a ton of cognitive energy to really figure out meaning behind everything. And it's just unbelievably exhausting. And Megan, you and I have talked about, like, replenishing, and trying to like recharging and being able to soothe, but sometimes it's really challenging to replenish that energy, and then you're playing catch up all the time. And I think that's why so many of us are just going through the world feeling really, really exhausted all the time. And I like your example, Megan, with acceptance and commitment therapy, and, you know, I've talked about, like, IFS, as well, internal family systems. And that has been very helpful for me to have like parts work because I can't always identify what's happening in the moment, or what I'm experiencing, or how I'm feeling. And if we're getting really cognitive, I really can't identify it then. But if I can break it into parts, like a part of me is feeling overwhelmed, and it's okay for that to show up, and I'm going to accept that, and I don't need to find out the meaning of why. I just need to accept that it exists. And there are other parts of me that are feeling okay or feeling more grounded. And that's been pretty remarkably life-changing, if I'm being really honest about it like that work has been so tremendously supportive in the last few years. THOMAS HENLEY: I think it was really important to mention the aspect to, like, the certainty around things because I feel like it's kind of weird because if you study neurotypicals, like I have, and just discovered this, like, so obsessed with understanding what's going on in their brains, I think there's a lot of situations where we give ourselves a hard time for not understanding certain things. Like, neurotypicals tend to talk a lot about things like read the room, and understand the hidden meaning, and understand things just from the flow of the conversation. But from my experience, particularly, in the workplace, or within friend groups, a lot of people that you talk to individually after those big sort of group conversations, they have completely different ideas of what's gone on. And I felt like, you know, we do have that drive to try and find that certainty out, specifically, like, around emotions and social things which are inherently so uncertain and emotional. It can be kind of hard for us. And it's kind of one of those things that I think a lot of neurotypicals they go with what they feel from the situation. And then, that's the truth. But compare and contrast each person in a certain group conversation, it's completely different. It's just that we like to know exactly what happened, and exactly what people are wanting, and exactly what they're trying to say. MEGAN NEFF: There's a TV show called The Affair. I don't know if either of you have watched it, but I've found it so interesting because… and I think there's maybe a few shows that do this, but they, like, really lean into it, the first season, at least, where you see this exact same episode but from different people's perspectives. And so, like, the characters will be wearing different clothes and different people's memories. And it's just so interesting, that idea of subjectivity, of everyone's experience of the same conversation, and then how it encodes in memory is wildly different, which is, frankly, terrifying for me. And someone who is anchored in like facts and logic of like, how did you get that from this conversation? But brains are weird. And the way we experience something is so heavily filtered by our past experiences, our beliefs, our biases. It's wild and terrifying. THOMAS HENLEY: Definitely agree. MEGAN NEFF: Like, all of us are going to walk away from this 40 minutes we spent together with different memories, different experiences. PATRICK CASALE: And probably our own different- THOMAS HENLEY: Perspectives. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, exactly. Different perspectives and interpretations, right? Because I'm the type of person who will walk away and analyze like, was that a good conversation? Did it feel meaningful? Did I show up the way I wanted to show up? All of those things will be running through my mind the rest of the day. So, yeah, it's just really interesting. Brains are weird. MEGAN NEFF: I'll actually be having similar questions. I'll also be like, why was I so foggy during that conversation? What was happening? Like, I'll also be thinking about, like, the relational dynamics, but also like, will that be it? Was that cohesive enough for a podcast? Was that a meaningful experience for Thomas? Was that worth his time to have him on? Yeah. PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, yeah. THOMAS HENLEY: I can confirm for [INDISCERNIBLE 00:31:17] certainty that it's a meaningful experience. I love chatting to you. And it's really nice to chat to you Patrick, as well. PATRICK CASALE: Thank you. Is this our awkward transition goodbye time because that's how I'm reading the interview [INDISCERNIBLE 00:31:32]. THOMAS HENLEY: I don't know how you guys wrap things up, so- PATRICK CASALE: We don't always- MEGAN NEFF: Do we want to say anything about where to find Thomas' work? And then wrap up? PATRICK CASALE: Yeah, Thomas, if you'd love to share with the audience where they can find you or what you're doing in the world, and what you're putting out there. THOMAS HENLEY: Sure, you can find my podcasts, the Thoughty Auti Podcast on YouTube, Spotify, any of the podcasting streaming services, or you can check out my Instagram page @thomashenleyuk where I make daily posts and about two reels a day, autism related. PATRICK CASALE: Your Instagram account is awesome. I mean, I found your stuff because Megan was on your podcast, and shared some of that, and I was watching, and really, really cool stuff, a lot of information, a lot of humor thrown in which I really enjoy, and a lot of really cool perspective. So, really appreciate just being able to have this time together and spend the last 40 minutes talking about all of this. THOMAS HENLEY: Thank you very much, Patrick. PATRICK CASALE: You're welcome. THOMAS HENLEY: I appreciate that. PATRICK CASALE: To everyone who is listening to the Divergent Conversations Podcast, new episodes are out every single Friday on all major podcast platforms. Like, download, subscribe, and share. And goodbye.
What is top down behavior, and how does it differ from bottom up behavior? Why is emotional regulation more difficult for neurodivergent people? How impactful or traumatic can a misdiagnosis or missed diagnosis be? Dr. Mona Delahooke, author of the book Brain-Body Parenting, discusses these questions and more with Emily Kircher-Morris on episode 180, a reprise of their timeless visit from one year ago. Educators, here's more information on our continuing education courses Emily talked about in the Neurodiversity University. Get in touch with us and find out how to make it available to everyone in your district. Also, we're launching a community for educators who are dedicated to creating a neurodiversity-affirming learning environment for students! Click here to hop on the waiting list and get more information. This will be an exciting and helpful place, with plenty of activities and resources every week that will help members grow and learn, from experts and each other. Mona Delahooke, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist with more than thirty years of experience caring for children and their families. She is a senior faculty member of the Profectum Foundation and a member of the American Psychological Association. She is the author of Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges, and Brain-Body Parenting. Dr Delahooke is a frequent speaker, trainer, and consultant to parents, organizations, schools, and public agencies. She lives and works in the Los Angeles area. BACKGROUND READING Mona's website Twitter Facebook Mona's books on Amazon
Being an Autistic human often pairs with a complex relationship with emotions. Just the question, "How do you feel," can feel so uncomfortable and spark anxiety, panic, and avoidance, often resulting in pre-planned responses or an answer that makes you think, "What the hell am I saying right now?" In her initial session with a new therapist, Megan Anna, an Autistic psychologist, unintentionally exposed her genuine feelings about emotions, inadvertently confessing, "I hate emotions." In this episode, you'll hear the personal experiences and realizations of both Patrick and Megan Anna around emotions, communication, and navigating relationships. If you or someone you know struggles with expressing emotions or feeling understood and connected to others, then this episode is for you. Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode: Understand how Autistic people may display emotions differently and the challenges we face in navigating and expressing our emotions. Identify signs of sensory overload, what can trigger it, and some methods to help self-soothe and regulate. Learn how and which tools and technologies to use to improve and aid in communication By gaining a deeper understanding of Autistic emotions, we gain the potential for greater self-awareness which can empower us to embrace our authentic selves, and foster meaningful connections.
What does intentional and unintentional gaslighting look like for Autistic people? Why is Mate Crime such a big problem for us? What are some neurodiverse relationship green flags and red flags? Joely Williams (@joelywilliams_myautisticwings) is a physically disabled Autistic speaker and author based in the UK. Diagnosed Autistic at 2 years old, but only aware of her neurodivergence at age 13, she speaks on lesser-known aspects of Autism and mental health from her own lived experience and knowledge as an Autistic woman. My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK // Joely's Website - www.myautisticwings.co.uk Dbud Noise Cancelling Adjustable Ear Buds (20% Off with code: THOUGHTYAUTI) - https://dbud.io/thoughtyautipodcast Breaking the ice, Thomas and Joely talk about their experiences with music therapy, nightlife, and music festivals as Autistic people. Joely describes herself as a strange mix of sensory seeking and sensory avoidant behaviours, feeling comfortable moshing it up with the best of them, but often feeling sensitive in other situations. Joely explains the concepts of intentional and unintentional gaslighting, at worst being a manipulative tactic or at the least an unhelpful reality-denying series of comments. Joely highlights that unintentional gaslighting often has good intentions, but can often be ableist in nature when thinking about Autistic people in teaching or parenting contexts; denying the utility of stimming or highlighting sensory issues as 'not too bad' being too prime examples of unintentional gaslighting. Infantilisation and stereotyping seem to be two common ways people gaslight autistic people. Those infantilising autistic people might paint them as children to deny their comments or opinions, or even enforce unwanted care on them. When stereotyping they may highlight things around empathy or social incompetence as a means for manipulation. Speaking on the reasons why Autistic people may be more prone to gaslighting, direct communication preferences, Alexithymia, mental illness, and prior negative conditioning are all highlighted. Joely describes the Autistic mind as processing facts first, meaning that it may take some time to process the context or social indirect communication around a statement. Alexithymia may make it more difficult to set immediate boundaries and mental illnesses like anxiety, prior invalidation of our experiences in youth, and bullying would definitely contribute to our lack of belief in our own experiences, Mate Crime is where someone takes advantage of a vulnerable person in order to extract monetary or intimate benefits from the individual or to humiliate and gain control over a person. Whilst being against the law, it's incredibly difficult to prove and takes advantage of a person's loneliness and isolation. Going through the red flags of possible toxic relationships, conversations around 'putting the person on a pedestal', faking full understanding of Autism, doing helpful things to coerce you or gain control, and driving a wedge between you and your support network were most apparent to the two. The individual might be seen to be doing you favours, but under the surface, they are robbing you of your ability to support yourself with things you really don't need help with. Some possible green flags of healthy relationships were highlighted: Lack of the rollercoaster of emotion or adrenaline response, clear boundaries that aren't crossed, curiosity about your experiences/autism, a feeling of boredom if you've had previous toxic relationships, conversations about meeting each other's needs, and non-reactivity to miscommunication. Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5 Interview me, 1:1 Autism Coaching, public speaking for events & workplace training - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK
The first in our Kim Namjoon Book Club. We noticed RM reading Almond (Won-Pyong Sohn) in the 2020 In the Soop series.It's the perfect book to jump into for these bonus monthly episodes. Almond tells the story of Yunjae, who at an early age, is diagnosed with Alexithymia, a condition where people are unable to identify or express their feelings (the almond of the title refers to the underdeveloped almond-shaped amygdalae in his brain. As a result, he has a hard time in social situations. Things take a dark turn when he loses his mother and grandma in a violent attack right before high school. It then becomes a tale of how one "monster" meets "another monster." This is a short read at only 250. Jump into the book club with Alison and Megan to hear their thoughts. Show Notes:Almond: A NovelIf you have any questions email us at afternoonaarmy@gmail.com.Want to try an audiobook for the bookclub? Don't forget to click here for your free Audible trial: http://www.audibletrial.com/afternoona*Audible is a sponsor of our sister pod over at Afternoona Delight Podcast*Want to catch other great BTS content? Visit www.afternoonaarmy.com. Love K-dramas too? Check out our sister podcast www.afternoonadelight.com.
Join Emily, Neurodivergent Therapist, and I as we chat about Alexithymia, identifying emotions, sensory input, communication, and emotional regulation. Don't miss it! ❤️ Holly- The Mom/Psychologist Who Gets It Learn more about Holly Learn more about Emily ⭐️ Get to Know my Child Guide Parents, get your free "Get to Know my Child Guide" here Educators, get your free "Get to Know my Child Guide" here Therapists get your free "Get to Know my Child Guide" here ⭐️Behavior Detective Guide Parents - Get your free Behavior Detective Guide Therapists - Get your free Behavior Detective Guide Educators - Get your free Behavior Detective Guide ⭐️Join the Facebook Groups Parents, Come on over and join the Autism ADHD Facebook Group for Parents Professionals, Join the Facebook Group for Therapists and Educators
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