Podcast appearances and mentions of Robert Glover

In this live conversation, I sit down with Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, to talk about the psychology of the modern man—especially the ones struggling in dead bedrooms, difficult marriages, and post-divorce confusion.We dig into why so many men unknowingly sabotage their relationships, how covert contracts fuel resentment, and what it takes to stop being the “nice guy” and start living a better life. If you've ever felt stuck in a marriage with no affection, no sex, and no answers—this is the episode for you.

In this poignant episode of Friday Field Notes, Ryan Michler delves into the pitfalls of people-pleasing, drawing from personal reflection. He identifies five critical signs—saying yes when you mean no, avoiding conflict, feeling responsible for others' emotions, tying self-worth to praise, and feeling burned out or resentful. Michler shares candid insights, referencing No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover and Let Them by Mel Robbins, offering practical anecdotes to break the cycle. Through raw honesty, he encourages listeners to set boundaries and prioritize self-care to become their authentic selves. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:19 - Introduction to People-Pleasing 04:53 - Recommended Resources 07:21 - Sign 1: Saying Yes When You Should Say No 09:49 - Sign 2: Avoiding Conflict at All Costs 13:25 - Sign 3: Feeling Responsible for Others' Feelings 18:53 - Sign 4: Struggling with Self-Worth Without Praise 28:04 - Sign 5: Feeling Burned Out, Resentful, and Unseen 34:50 - Actionable Steps and Closing Thoughts Battle Planners: Pick yours up today! Order Ryan's new book, The Masculinity Manifesto. For more information on the Iron Council brotherhood. Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready

In this conversation, Sathiya Sam & Dr. Glover discussed the pervasive issue of Nice Guy Syndrome and its correlation with pornography addiction and sexual compulsion. Dr. Robert Glover explores the cultural shifts that have influenced masculinity, the importance of emotional awareness, and the critical role of community in supporting men's mental health. Connect with Dr. Robert Glover Integration Nation Website Find Out More About My DeepClean Recovery Program Here Get A Free Copy of The Last Relapse, A Blueprint For Recovery Watch Sathiya on Youtube For More Content Like This   Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Nice Guy Syndrome and Its Impact 10:01 Cultural Shifts and Masculinity 19:57 Emotional Awareness and Balance in Men 29:58 The Role of Community in Overcoming Loneliness 36:24 Embracing Loneliness and Connection 39:30 The Impact of Convenience on Relationships 40:52 The Value of Challenge and Inconvenience 46:58 Understanding Nice Guy Syndrome and Porn Addiction 52:15 The Role of Shame in Sexuality 01:00:22 Healing Through Vulnerability and Community

In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan dive into Chapter 10 of Dating Essentials for Men by Dr. Robert Glover: "Activate Women's Basic Biological Urges." We explore why confidence, competence, and authentic self-expression are essential for real attraction—and why just being "nice" can backfire.You'll learn:The key differences between niceness and true kindnessWhy honesty and directness are more attractive than playing it safeHow confidence and competence build magnetic statusThe dangers of the "friend zone" and why pretending not to care never worksWhy embracing authenticity beats trying to please everyoneWe also share personal stories about overcoming fear of rejection, building real-world confidence, and why living authentically—even if it turns off a few people—is the only sustainable path to connection and success.If you've ever wondered why women seem to respond to boldness over politeness—or how to break free from the "nice guy" trap—this episode is for you.Keywords: dating advice for men, confidence and attraction, nice guy syndrome, friend zone, Dr. Robert Glover, Dating Essentials for Men, how to build confidence, male self-improvement, authenticity in dating, social anxiety tipsSupport the show

Let me know your thoughts on the show and what topic you would like me to discuss next.Have you and your spouse drifted from passionate partners to practical roommates? For many men, that's exactly where we find ourselves - the sparks gone, connections dulled, and intimacy feeling more like a distant memory than daily reality. But there's hope in understanding a fundamental truth: passion doesn't die, it drifts.This deeply personal exploration cuts through surface-level marriage advice to address what's really happening when men stop pursuing their own edge and growth. When we trade emotional authenticity for approval and hide behind "nice guy" behavior, we create the very disconnection we're trying to avoid. The missing ingredient isn't more date nights or better communication techniques - it's reclaiming our masculine presence.Women crave men who can pierce their hearts with presence, not predictability. When a man becomes domesticated and avoids depth, his wife feels that loss physically and emotionally. The passion wanes not because of age or time but because his consciousness no longer leads her to that moment of connection.Through practical wisdom drawn from David Deida, Robert Glover, and Jack Donovan's work, we explore how vulnerability fuels passion and why leading your marriage like a CEO kills attraction. You'll discover why the myth that passion should be spontaneous is holding you back and how comfort collapses the very polarity that creates desire.The transformation starts when you stop asking "what happened to us?" and start asking "who do I need to become to reignite what we had?" Through emotional presence, reclaimed polarity, strategic disruption of routines, and reconnection to purpose, you can lead your marriage back to fire - not through manipulation, but through authentic leadership.Ready to stop coasting and start leading your marriage with depth, strength and clarity? Take our free integrity challenge at members.theawakenedman.net and begin the journey back to the man you were meant to be.Key moments in this episode:01:48 The Reality of Modern Marriages05:18 The Role of Masculine Presence06:37 The Myth of Spontaneous Passion08:26 Leading Your Marriage: Avoiding the CEO Trap10:25 The Power of Vulnerability12:39 A Story of Transformation: Ryan's Journey16:39 Practical Tips for Reigniting Passion21:53 Recommended Resources for MenSupport the showThanks for listening to the Revolutionary Man Podcast. If you want more information about our programs use the links below to check us out. It could be the step that changes your life.

In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan break down Dr. Robert Glover's six essentials for creating a life that naturally attracts women—without chasing or people-pleasing. Drawing from Dating Essentials for Men, they reflect on how men can lead more purposeful, fulfilling lives by focusing on passion, friendship, challenge, and service.Whether you're single, dating, or in a long-term relationship, this conversation will help you cultivate habits and practices that boost confidence, deepen connection, and strengthen your sense of masculine purpose.What You'll Learn:Why “happy wife, happy life” is a trap—and what to focus on insteadHow to prioritize your passion without guilt or resentmentThe often-overlooked importance of strong male friendshipsHow daily challenges and physical exertion sharpen your mindsetEasy ways to develop a meaningful spiritual or mindfulness practiceWhat it really means to “give your gift to the world”—and how to startKey Topics Covered:Life passion as your driving forceMaintaining close friendships with other menIncorporating daily strenuous physical activityLeaning into discomfort and overcoming resistanceBuilding a consistent spiritual or reflective practiceCreating value for others through contribution and serviceMentioned in this Episode:Dating Essentials for Men by Dr. Robert GloverThe War of Art by Steven PressfieldAndrew Huberman on movement, vision, and creativityQuotable Moments:“Build a life that you enjoy during the downtime as well as the uptime—and the alone time as well as the partner time.” —CharlesSupport the show

You're not having the sex or the relationship you want? This could be the reason. "No More Mr Nice Guy" author Dr Glover breaks it down beautifully.Full MTM Episode here: https://pod.fo/e/2a17edLeave us a comment below - we would love to hear your thoughts.

In this thoughtful and engaging episode, Charles and Dan explore Chapter 8 of Dating Essentials for Men by Dr. Robert Glover, which takes aim at the common male fantasy of dating a "hot woman." Together, they unpack the psychological traps of prioritizing physical appearance over true compatibility and emotional connection.The conversation dives into:What "hot" really means in Glover's context—and why it often translates to "vain"The danger of pedestalizing someone based on looks aloneReal-life stories about relationships with high-status partners and what actually makes a relationship fulfillingHow insecurity and over-investment can sabotage connectionThe difference between approach and attractionWhy building a life you genuinely enjoy is the best way to attract the right partnerCharles and Dan also share personal stories about car shopping

“When you say I am anything, you're basically tying something in with your identity. It's who you are as a person.”Many men today are drifting—busy but aimless, productive yet unfulfilled. This conversation explores the idea that without a mission, a man is merely passing time. A man's sense of identity must be tied to something deeper than just his job or routine; it must be anchored in purpose. When a man claims his mission and fuses it with his identity, he no longer lives for weekends or approval. He lives for something that lights him up and draws others to him. Purpose, not comfort, is the compass.Paul Bauer speaks candidly about rebuilding his life after hardship and channeling that transformation into a platform to help other men. He emphasizes the need for men to seek meaningful discomfort, reconnect to their hunger, and create a brand that stems from real conviction. His story illustrates how aligning your brand, purpose, and passion can make you magnetic and fulfilled—even if it means sticking your knee in a bucket of ice every morning.Paul Bauer is a certified life coach and NLP practitioner best known as the host of the Come On Man podcast. Specializing in attraction dynamics and masculine self-improvement, Paul guides men through the chaos of modern relationships and back into leadership roles within their lives.Learn more & connect:Come On Man Podcast – Hosted by Paul Bauerhttps://comeonmanpod.com/No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover: https://www.drglover.com/no-more-mr-nice-guy.htmlBob Proctor – A mentor known for purpose and success.https://www.proctorgallagherinstitute.com/programs/you-were-born-richChoice Theory by William Glasserhttps://www.amazon.com/Choice-Theory-Psychology-Personal-Freedom/dp/0060930144You're invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you're there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

In this insightful episode of "Mindfully Masculine," Charles and Dan delve into Chapter 5 of "Dating Essentials for Men" by Dr. Robert Glover, exploring why your brain is hardwired to keep you safe—even if it means sabotaging your dating life. They discuss the hidden comfort traps, anxiety management, overcoming the fear of rejection, and why immediate action is crucial for personal growth and successful dating.Key Topics Covered:Understanding anxiety as your brain's protective mechanismWhy your brain favors familiar discomfort over unfamiliar successPractical strategies for overcoming fear and anxiety in datingThe true cost of avoiding rejectionHow an "abundance mindset" changes your dating outcomesManaging vs. soothing anxiety—why the distinction mattersFriend Zone: How men unintentionally trap themselves and how to avoid it"Geeks with Techniques": Why action matters more than informationThe power of immediate action and realistic expectationsNotable Quotes:"Your brain's job isn't to make your dreams come true; it's to keep you alive.""Failure needs to be part of the process—success is a numbers game.""Men who aren't resilient to rejection spiral out of control or shut down.""Testing for interest is not about being accepted or rejected personally, it's about understanding mutual interest."Actionable Tips:Expand Your Comfort Zone: Regularly interact with new people and situations to reduce social anxiety.Reframe Rejection: Adopt the mindset "I can handle it," turning setbacks into growth opportunities.Immediate Action: Apply the "three-second rule" to bypass anxiety and hesitation in social interactions.Test for Interest: Engage authentically without pressure, using interactions to gauge mutual interest.Book Featured: "Dating Essentials for Men" by Dr. Robert GloverFind More: Visit mindfullymasculine.com for full audio and video episodes, updates, and resources to enhance your personal growth and relationship success.Support the show

Cet épisode est une lecture de ma newsletter disponible ici. Vous pouvez retrouver la vidéo de cet épisode sur Youtube sur la chaîne de Vlan!Dans cette époque particulièrement dystopique, la gentillesse trône au sommet de la hiérarchie des vertus recherchées.On la réclame, on la valorise, on l'érige en panacée contre toutes les violences contemporaines. Partout, on implore la bonté, on quémande la générosité, on s'abreuve avidement aux sources des énergies positives.Et je m'y plie avec dévotion depuis ma plus tendre enfance.Je me suis toujours défini comme un « gentil » et c'est probablement ainsi que mon entourage me décrirait sans hésiter quoique c'est sans doute présomptueux de ma part. Mais cette vertu tant louée dissimule-t-elle des zones d'ombre que je refuse obstinément de reconnaître ou plutôt contre lesquelles je ne travaille pas assez?Il y a quelques mois, le jour de mon anniversaire, une amie autrice britannique, Taiye Selasi, m'a lancé cette phrase qui m'a ébranlé : « The problem, Greg, is that you are a nice guy when you should be kind instead ».Encore une fois, une nuance linguistique anglaise qui m'échappait. Car comme vous sans doute, à cet instant précis, j'étais incapable de distinguer entre « nice » et « kind », les deux se fondant dans le même mot français : « gentil ». Je lui ai donc demandé d'éclairer ma lanterne.Gentil ou authentique : le dilemme qui vous détruitElle m'a expliqué que « kind » incarnait une forme de bienveillance et de bonté du cœur qui circule dans les deux sens – envers les autres, mais aussi, et c'est crucial, envers soi-même.Une personne « kind » connaît intimement ses propres limites et pose des frontières claires aux autres. Tandis qu'une personne « nice » serait rongée par un besoin viscéral d'être aimée, au point que toutes ses barrières s'effondrent – transformant cette prétendue qualité en authentique défaut.Elle m'a alors recommandé la lecture de « No More Mister Nice Guy » de Robert Glover, que j'ai reçu sans tarder sur Vlan !L'épisode étant en anglais, j'ai décidé d'en faire cette newsletter pour vous expliquer pourquoi ce sujet me touche personnellement, et partager avec vous ce que j'en retire.Il y a tant de personnes méchantes et sournoises dans ce monde, pourquoi donc questionner la gentillesse ?Existe-t-il véritablement un « syndrome du gentil » ?La gentillesse pourrait-elle cacher des faces obscures ? Comment être gentil de manière juste ? Doit-on adhérer entièrement à la réflexion de Robert Glover ? Quelles critiques peut-on lui adresser ?La gentillesse comme bouclier contre les coupsPour saisir pourquoi ce sujet me touche particulièrement, je dois vous embarquer dans la construction de mon identité, et je pressens que cela résonnera avec certains d'entre vous.Ma mère n'était pas fondamentalement maltraitante, mais elle nous battait, mon frère et moi, de façon régulière (oui j'ai traité le sujet avec elle depuis).J'ai donc appris très tôt cette équation fatale : pour être aimé, il fallait être gentil, se plier en quatre pour tenter désespérément de faire plaisir.Bien sûr, je suis naturellement doté d'une bonté et d'une générosité profonde, mais vous remarquerez sans doute que la gentillesse dans laquelle je me suis enfermé n'était pas authentiquement la mienne. J'y reviendrai.Mon objectif premier ? Éviter les coups, tout simplement, mais surtout – gagner l'amour de ma mère. Cela implique que j'ai également intégré l'idée que les coups pouvaient s'entrelacer à l'amour – mais c'est un autre sujet que j'explorerai en temps voulu.Mon enfance s'est structurée sur ces fondations : la gentillesse comme mécanisme instinctif de protection et le rire comme échappatoire vitale. Comment refuser d'aimer une personne gentille ? Une personne qui s'évertue à devancer vos moindres attentes ?Au fil des années, je me suis métamorphosé en véritable caméléon, tentant de devenir ce que j'imaginais que les autres attendaient de moi, fuyant le conflit comme la peste.“Qu'est-ce qu'ils vont penser ?” : le mantra des dominésIl y a évidemment une part naturelle de socialisation et un besoin viscéral d'appartenance dans tout cela.Particulièrement quand, comme moi, vous êtes métis sans racines solides d'un côté puisque « descendant d'esclaves », portant le fardeau de la culpabilité d'être différent, écrasé par la pression sociétale d'être un « bon français », ce qui en France, avec notre modèle d'intégration républicaine, suppose d'être « plus blanc que blanc ».Ma mère nous a inculqué très tôt l'obligation d'être plus polis, plus irréprochables que quiconque, nous martelant régulièrement cette question : « qu'est-ce qu'ils vont penser ? ».Déjà qu'on nous montrait du doigt dans le village de mes grands-parents paternels – il semblait évident qu'on devait faire profil bas.Cqfd : cette stratégie est vouée à l'échec. On vous reprochera toujours votre couleur de peau jusqu'à ce que vous vous intégriez socialement, c'est-à-dire jusqu'à ce que vos revenus ou votre statut vous permettent de transcender cette réalité.Et même dans ce cas, dans certains contextes, cela reste illusoire.Pour être sincère, les gens tombent toujours des nues quand j'évoque le racisme ordinaire qui a jalonné mon existence, car après tout « on ne dirait pas vraiment que tu es noir toi, on pourrait penser que tu es italien, israélien, libanais, marocain, etc. ».J'ai entendu cette phrase un nombre incalculable de fois et ma réponse reste invariablement la même : « ce qui est certain, c'est que je ne suis pas blanc, et je peux t'assurer que la rue, la police, les institutions me le rappellent régulièrement ». Je vous le confie ici : je suis né d'un père bourguignon et d'une mère martiniquaise, elle-même métisse noire et indienne – et aujourd'hui, j'en porte fièrement l'héritage.Par ailleurs, il faut savoir qu'une règle tacite règne presque universellement (y compris sur les continents africain et asiatique) : plus la peau est claire, plus on vous valorise – le noir occupant le bas de l'échelle, particulièrement pour les femmes malheureusement pour elles, les études sont unanimes.Je vous raconte tout cela car ce phénomène a exacerbé un complexe qui grandissait insidieusement en moi.Votre gentillesse vous étouffe - et les autres le sententComme Robert Glover l'explique, être un "nice guy" suppose de dissimuler sa véritable nature pour éviter de froisser quiconque.Cette dynamique rappelle étrangement le "doublethink" décrit par Orwell dans "1984" – cette capacité à maintenir simultanément deux croyances contradictoires. D'un côté, notre authenticité profonde, et de l'autre, l'image que nous projetons pour être acceptés.Le terme qui définirait le plus justement ce type de gentillesse serait peut-être « débonnaire », qui signifie selon le Larousse « être bon jusqu'à la faiblesse ».Un terme rarement utilisé mais qui capture parfaitement ce que Robert Glover décrit, et que j'adopterai désormais dans cette newsletter pour définir ce type de « gentillesse ».Cela me permet en outre de préserver le terme « gentil » qui me semble fondamentalement précieux.Les débonnaires, donc, sont tellement obsédés par la dissimulation de leur véritable nature et par les désirs des autres qu'ils en oublient leurs propres aspirations.Une voix intérieure nous souffle : « ça sera plus simple comme ça, sinon ça va créer du conflit et on doit pouvoir l'éviter ». Deux scénarios se présentent alors : soit notre interlocuteur, presque malgré lui, repousse les limites et devient maltraitant – un comportement infantile qui révèle le besoin que quelqu'un fixe des frontières.Soit le débonnaire accumule tant de frustrations qu'il finit par exploser, provoquant précisément les tensions qu'il s'efforçait d'éviter.Dans les deux cas, nous sommes inéluctablement perdants.Je suis gentil, donc je ne suis pasSelon Robert Glover, la débonnaireté s'enracine dans deux terrains principaux : une honte toxique accompagnée d'une petite voix intérieure qui murmure « je ne suis pas assez bien comme je suis » ou simplement « je ne suis pas assez », et une angoisse dévorante d'être abandonné ou blessé.On retrouve ici les personnes avec un attachement anxieux. J'ai d'ailleurs consacré un épisode de Vlan ! à ce sujet, si vous souhaitez l'approfondir.En deux mots, la théorie de l'attachement, développée par John Bowlby, distingue trois types principaux d'attachement : anxieux, sécurisé et évitant. Ces modèles d'attachement se forgent généralement durant l'enfance.L'attachement anxieux se développe lorsque la réponse aux besoins émotionnels de l'enfant est imprévisible ou incohérente.En grandissant, ces individus vivent dans la crainte perpétuelle de perdre l'affection ou l'attention d'autrui, cherchant à compenser cette insécurité fondamentale par des comportements de dépendance affective marqués.Une personne ayant développé un attachement anxieux sera particulièrement vulnérable à la codépendance.Elle s'enferme dans une dynamique où ses besoins, ses désirs et son équilibre émotionnel dépendent étroitement du regard et de l'attention de l'autre.Cette dépendance excessive engendre souvent un cercle vicieux : plus la personne s'accroche, plus elle risque d'éloigner l'autre, confirmant ainsi sa peur primordiale de l'abandon.Vivre par procuration : l'existence fantômeLa codépendance est un concept initialement forgé dans le contexte des addictions, spécifiquement pour décrire le comportement des proches de personnes dépendantes à l'alcool ou à des substances. Il émerge aux États-Unis dans les années 1970, en parallèle de la prise de conscience des dynamiques relationnelles au sein des familles d'alcooliques.Originellement, être codépendant signifiait adopter un comportement centré sur l'autre, jusqu'à s'oublier soi-même, dans une tentative désespérée de contrôler, sauver ou protéger la personne dépendante.Au fil du temps, le concept de codépendance a transcendé le cadre strict des addictions pour décrire des relations affectives marquées par une anxiété relationnelle intense. Aujourd'hui, la codépendance désigne une tendance à s'investir excessivement dans les relations, à dépendre viscéralement de l'approbation d'autrui pour nourrir son estime de soi, et à éprouver une anxiété dévorante liée à la peur de l'abandon ou du rejet.Prendre conscience de ces mécanismes permet de mieux comprendre et d'apaiser ces dynamiques relationnelles en travaillant notamment sur la sécurisation de son attachement et sur l'affirmation de soi.Personnellement, je ne pense pas avoir vécu de véritable codépendance, mais j'ai longtemps navigué avec un attachement anxieux que j'ai laborieusement travaillé en thérapie, me permettant d'atteindre aujourd'hui un attachement bien plus sécurisé. D'ailleurs, plus que de codépendance, Robert Glover préfère parler de « fonctionnement emprunté » (« borrowed functioning »).Ce concept décrit une situation où l'on s'appuie excessivement sur les compétences, les émotions ou la validation d'autrui pour fonctionner quotidiennement, faute de pouvoir mobiliser ses propres ressources intérieures. Cette perspective souligne l'importance cruciale de cultiver une véritable autonomie émotionnelle plutôt que de vivre par procuration.Le contrat invisible qui pourrit vos relationsCette démarche, observée avec recul, recèle une dimension profondément auto-centrée : la personne cherche avant tout à éviter l'abandon, à s'assurer d'être aimée – il s'agit fondamentalement d'elle-même, non de l'autre.Comme l'explique Robert Glover, cela revient implicitement à dire : « regarde comme je suis gentil, regarde tout ce que je fais pour toi, regarde comme il n'y a jamais de problème avec moi ».L'injustice fondamentale de cette approche réside dans le contrat tacite que le débonnaire établit : « si j'agis ainsi pour toi, alors tu dois agir ainsi pour moi » – mais l'autre ignore tout de ce contrat implicite, et l'émetteur lui-même n'en a souvent pas conscience.J'évoquais plus haut l'effet « cocotte-minute » des débonnaires, un phénomène que je m'efforce d'éviter mais auquel je me dois d'avour que je succombe encore régulièrement.Robert Glover explique que cela peut culminer en un véritable déversement victimaire : « regarde comme tu me traites alors que moi, j'ai fait tout cela pour toi, et moi, et moi... »L'injustice fondamentale tient au fait que le débonnaire incrimine l'autre pour des choses qu'elle n'a jamais explicitement demandées.Parfois, ce comportement sabote la relation elle-même : à force de vouloir éviter de heurter qui que ce soit, on finit par causer des blessures bien plus profondes.Le paradoxe fatal : blesser en voulant protégerJe me souviens d'une situation emblématique entre une amie très proche, de passage à Paris, et ma nouvelle compagne de l'époque, il y a 15 ou 20 ans.Toutes deux souhaitaient me voir au même moment, et je désirais les voir toutes les deux.Plutôt que d'aborder franchement la situation avec l'une ou l'autre, j'ai tenté de les voir toutes les deux, résultant en une double frustration : aucune n'avait eu suffisamment de mon temps.Sur le moment, j'ai trouvé leur réaction profondément injuste, alors qu'il aurait suffi d'exprimer clairement la situation, sans craindre un désaccord imaginaire, pour que tout se résolve naturellement.En réalité, nous présupposons les réactions des autres sans jamais solliciter leur avis – c'est l'un des travers majeurs des débonnaires, qui deviennent ainsi, paradoxalement, manipulateurs.Le paradoxe, c'est que j'apprécie profondément cette facette de ma personnalité : ma générosité, mon empathie, ma nature accommodante.La question n'est évidemment pas de renier ces qualités, mais plutôt d'apprendre à reconnaître ce qui nous dérange, à l'exprimer sereinement et à établir des limites claires.Dit ainsi, cela semble simple – mais je sais pertinemment qu'on ne réalise souvent qu'après coup qu'on n'a pas respecté ses propres limites.Vers une gentillesse authentique : pistes de reconstructionComment s'extraire de ces mécanismes, ou comment accompagner quelqu'un qui s'y reconnaît ?Je crois que l'essentiel réside dans la communication ouverte, la compréhension des traumas sous-jacents, puis un travail personnel, en couple et généralement avec un thérapeute in fine.Un conseil précieux que j'ai reçu et que je m'efforce d'appliquer : quand on est fondamentalement cérébral, il peut être révélateur de se tourner vers des approches thérapeutiques centrées sur le corps – et inversement.Notre tendance naturelle nous pousse vers des thérapies qui font écho à notre fonctionnement, mais l'inverse peut s'avérer profondément transformateur.J'ai d'ailleurs consacré plusieurs épisodes au corps, notamment sur la posture juste avec Thierry Janssen, chirurgien devenu thérapeute, sur le nerf vague avec Ludovic Leroux, ou encore sur l'intelligence corporelle avec Eve Berger.On peut commencer par cultiver l'affirmation de soi, apprendre l'art du refus, exprimer clairement ses ressentis, et privilégier son bien-être personnel.S'exercer simplement à dire « non » dans des contextes peu menaçants pour renforcer progressivement sa confiance.C'est en tout cas, ce que je m'assigne à faire.Parallement, si cela peut résonner avec vous, consignez régulièrement dans un journal les situations où vous avez peiné à établir vos limites, en identifiant précisément ce que vous auriez préféré dire ou faire.Une thérapie cognitive comportementale (TCC) peut également vous aider à repérer vos schémas de pensée automatiques et à les remplacer par des perspectives plus réalistes et affirmées.De mon côté, je crois que je vais aller avec un thérapeute somatique pour terminer le travail déjà bien débuté.Si vous n'êtes pas concernée mais que vous côtoyez une personne encline à cette gentillesse excessive, vous pouvez l'aider délicatement à prendre conscience de ses propres limites.Au lieu d'entretenir indirectement ce déséquilibre, encouragez-la à exprimer clairement ses désirs et besoins, même lorsqu'ils diffèrent des vôtres.Proposez-lui des échanges réguliers où elle peut s'exercer à l'affirmation de soi, dans un espace sécurisant où elle peut librement exprimer ses véritables émotions.Évitez tout jugement ou culpabilisation, mais valorisez chaque avancée, même infime, vers l'affirmation personnelle.La question de la masculinité : limite de l'approche de GloverJe diverge de Robert Glover concernant sa vision des relations de genre – son livre s'adresse aux hommes et soutient l'idée que la masculinité serait menacée.Dans notre conversation, il explique qu'historiquement, en raison du patriarcat, les femmes dépendaient financièrement de leurs maris puisqu'elles ne travaillaient pas (ce qui, soit dit en passant, est inexact pour le Moyen Âge).Selon lui, la situation s'est inversée : les femmes seraient devenues plus compétitrices que les hommes.Ces derniers seraient plus passifs, se retrouveraient en position de dépendance, cherchant désespérément à séduire et à plaire.Il dépeint également les réseaux sociaux et les services comme Uber ou Deliveroo comme des « assassins de la masculinité », renforçant prétendument la passivité masculine.Pendant ce temps, les femmes seraient constamment dans la prise de décision et l'action. Elles travaillent majoritairement et, de retour au foyer, assument l'essentiel de la charge mentale et des responsabilités parentales (école, médecin, anticipation des besoins...) – toutes ces activités s'inscrivant dans une dynamique d'action associée, selon lui, à une énergie « masculine ».Selon lui, elles auraient besoin qu'on honore leur féminité, tandis que les hommes devraient reprendre les rênes décisionnelles et l'initiative, sans pour autant chercher à contrôler leurs partenaires.Je ne m'oppose pas totalement à ces pensées mais n'ayant pas approfondi cette dimension avec lui, je peine à cerner pleinement sa penséeToutefois, il me semble important de mentionner que certains lui reprochent une approche qualifiée de masculiniste.Je consacrerai prochainement une newsletter à la masculinité – un sujet fascinant, tant je constate la désorientation de nombreux hommes face à des demandes féminines parfois contradictoires, qu'elles soient conscientes ou non.Être vrai avant d'être gentil : le nouveau contrat social"Si la gentillesse demeure une valeur cardinale, elle doit s'exercer dans un respect égal de soi-même et d'autrui. Comme l'écrivait George Orwell à propos de son engagement contre le fascisme durant la guerre civile espagnole : « Si vous m'aviez demandé pourquoi j'avais rejoint la milice, j'aurais répondu : 'Pour lutter contre le fascisme', et si vous m'aviez demandé pour quoi je me battais, j'aurais répondu : 'Pour la décence commune'. »Cette « décence commune » pourrait bien constituer la clé d'une gentillesse authentique – non pas une gentillesse qui mendie l'approbation à tout prix, mais une bienveillance ancrée dans l'intégrité personnelle, consciente de ses propres limites tout en s'ouvrant généreusement aux autres.Le chemin est sinueux, semé d'obstacles, mais chaque pas vers cette authenticité représente une victoire.Car être véritablement gentil, c'est avant tout être vrai. Suggestion d'autres épisodes à écouter : #171 Mieux se connaitre pour trouver une posture juste avec Thierry Janssen (https://audmns.com/jeikAHO) Vlan #135 Se reconnecter à l'intelligence du corps avec Eve Berger Grosjean (https://audmns.com/ETKQSfx) #288 le remède miracle contre le stress avec Ludovic Leroux (https://audmns.com/aHHEdaH)Distribué par Audiomeans. Visitez audiomeans.fr/politique-de-confidentialite pour plus d'informations.

In this episode of the Modern Man Podcast, host and guest Dr. Robert Glover delve into the complexities of male identity, the challenges of Nice Guy Syndrome, and the importance of community in personal growth. Dr. Glover shares his journey from being a 'nice guy' to understanding the deeper issues that men face in relationships and personal development. He emphasizes the need for men to embrace vulnerability, establish boundaries, and seek support from like-minded individuals. The conversation highlights the ongoing nature of self-improvement and the significance of authentic connections in overcoming personal struggles. In this conversation, Dr. Robert Glover discusses the importance of male connection and community, emphasizing how men's groups and retreats can transform lives. He explores the concept of boundaries, reframing them as tools for leadership and deeper relationships. Through personal anecdotes and insights, he highlights the necessity of experiencing community and the profound impact it can have on personal development and emotional health. Dr. Glover also shares a life-changing near-death experience that reshaped his perspective on life and fear. Takeaways The journey of self-improvement is ongoing and never truly finished. Nice Guy Syndrome often stems from early life experiences and emotional memories. Men need to learn to be vulnerable and open about their feelings. Establishing boundaries is crucial for personal growth and healthy relationships. Community support plays a vital role in overcoming personal challenges. Men often overcorrect from being 'nice' to being overly assertive or selfish. Authenticity is key to building trust in relationships. Self-sacrificing behaviors can lead to decreased relationship satisfaction. It's important to recognize and address emotional triggers in relationships. Men benefit from learning in a supportive group environment. Men need connections to learn from their experiences. The community can provide support and accountability. Experiencing a men's group can be transformative. Boundaries are about self-empowerment, not control. The 'ouch' method helps communicate feelings effectively. Healthy boundaries invite deeper relationships. Men are wired to be part of a tribe. A near-death experience can change your outlook on life. Setting boundaries can lead to healthier interactions. Men's retreats offer invaluable experiences for growth.   Glover' s Links Website: drglover.com Books: No More Mr. Nice Guy: No More Mr. Nice Guy Dating Essentials for Men: Dating Essentials for Men Social Media: X: dr_r_glover Facebook: drrobertglover   Free eBook Here: Mastering Self-Development: Strategies of the New Masculine: https://rebrand.ly/m2ebook   ⚔️JOIN THE NOBLE KNIGHTS MASTERMIND⚔️ https://themodernmanpodcast.com/thenobleknights   

So-called “nice guys” seek validation, avoid conflict, and suppress their needs and desires. This can leave them feeling frustrated, disconnected, and resentful. These patterns can harm their relationships, self-esteem, and ability to live authentically.Men need to break free from these behaviours and reclaim their sense of self. This means learning to set boundaries, asking for what they want, and releasing the shame they carry, especially around sexuality and vulnerability.When men show up as authentic, grounded, and confident, they create deeper connections and live more fulfilling lives.This conversation with Dr Robert Glover will help youBreak free from seeking external validation and develop genuine self-confidenceEmbrace your masculine energy while maintaining authenticity in relationshipsMove beyond the "nice guy" syndrome and create more fulfilling connectionsLinksVisit Dr Glover's websiteIntegration Nation – A worldwide tribe of integrated menFollow Dr Glover on YouTubeFollow @drgloverofficial on InstagramMentioned in this episode:Relationship Coaching Fundamentals Master the art of deep coaching & high-converting sales.The Awakened Masculine Program An 8-week immersive journey into the depths of unleashing your awakened masculine power.

“You can be anything to a woman, but you can't be boring.”The hard truth? Attraction dies when a man trades his edge for comfort, his decisiveness for “whatever you want, babe,” and his self-respect for a never-ending to-do list. Women don't fall for a guy because he's nice; they fall for a guy who makes their heart race, who leads with confidence, and who—let's be honest—knows how to keep things interesting. Lose that, and you're not in a relationship—you're in a slow-moving hostage situation.Our guest breaks down why so many men go from exciting to invisible in their own relationships. He shares war stories, laugh-out-loud failures, and the hard-earned lessons that turned it all around. The secret sauce? Stop asking permission, start leading, and remember: attraction isn't a faucet you turn on when you're in the mood—it's a dynamic you maintain every single day.Paul Bauer is a men's coach, author, and podcast host who learned the rules of attraction the hard way—by breaking every single one of them. After years of trial, error, and some truly questionable dating decisions, he dedicated himself to understanding what makes relationships work. Now, he helps men reclaim their confidence, maintain their edge, and, most importantly, avoid becoming the human equivalent of background noise in their own love lives.Learn more & connect:Come on, Man podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ComeOnManPodcastBooks: The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Male-Rollo-Tomassi/dp/1492777862 No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover https://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-Guy/dp/0762415339 The Player's Handbook by Rollo Tomassi https://www.amazon.com/Players-Handbook-Rational-Male/dp/1801440402 Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill https://www.amazon.com/Think-Grow-Rich-Landmark-Bestseller/dp/1585424331 Atomic Attraction by Christopher Canwell https://www.amazon.com/Atomic-Attraction-Psychology-Mastery-Dating/dp/1953616012 Married Man Sex Life Primer 2011 by Athol Kay https://www.amazon.com/Married-Man-Life-Primer-2011/dp/1460981731 The Essential Skills of a Masculine Presence Psychology Paradigm https://a.co/d/4D1djp0You're invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you're there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

You fear rejection—but what if the real problem isn't hearing “no,” but never taking the shot at all? In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan dive into Dr. Robert Glover's Dating Essentials for Men to unpack the hidden costs of avoiding rejection, and why reframing it can change everything.

Tired of being the 'nice guy' but afraid of becoming a jerk? Discover how authentic masculinity transforms your relationships and ignites genuine desire. If you're a man who finds yourself constantly seeking approval or walking on eggshells in relationships, you'll learn about Nice Guy Syndrome, how to break free from people-pleasing patterns, and why authenticity is the key to better relationships. Learn why being "nice" can actually damage your intimate connections and how to develop genuine confidence without becoming a jerk. Whether you're single and struggling to connect or in a relationship feeling sexually unfulfilled, this episode has transformative insights for you.  Stop sacrificing yourself for approval - start living authentically and watch your relationships transform.

In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan dive into Dating Essentials for Men by Dr. Robert Glover, exploring the psychology behind self-limiting beliefs and how they affect dating, relationships, and personal growth. They discuss how to shift from self-doubt to confidence by embracing vulnerability, reframing rejection, and stepping outside of your comfort zone.Key Topics Covered:✅ Overcoming self-limiting beliefs in dating and life✅ The role of vulnerability and authenticity in attraction✅ How social conditioning impacts relationships✅ Breaking free from the fear of rejection✅ The power of confidence through discomfort✅ Why men should stop romanticizing unavailable women✅ Practical steps to challenge self-doubt and build successWhy Listen?If you've ever struggled with confidence in dating or found yourself stuck in negative self-talk, this episode is packed with actionable insights to help you reframe your mindset, build resilience, and take control of your dating life.Resources & Links:

Dr. Robert Glover, therapist, coach, speaker, and educator is a relationship expert with over 40 years of professional experience. The author of the groundbreaking, No More Mr. Nice Guy, the best-selling Dating Essentials for Men, and the recently released, Dating Essentials for Men: Frequently Asked Questions, Dr. Glover has helped thousands of men world-wide transform their lives and get what they want in relationship, sex, and career. Dr. Robert's purpose in life and my legacy is to give every man the opportunity to experience masculinity-affirming, life-building, heart-strengthening community and mentoring with and from other good men. Join Dr. Robert's group coaching programme Integration Nation here: https://integrationnation.net/   In this episode you will hear: 00:00:00 Intro00:02:22 Dr. Robert's observation and analysis of masculinity in the world today00:07:00 The end of the toxic masculinity meme – men are rising up00:10:30 First and Second order change 00:21:00 The worldly pull away from the home and for your attention00:29:30 Integrated men – you can be a d**k, but you are not a d**k00:36:20 Be fruitful and multiply…00:40:26 Why Nice Guys rot in middle-management00:53:11 Masculine (internal) and Femine (external) approval 00:54:32 The number one thing men can do to start leading their relationship with love01:00:00 Dr. Robert's Integration Nation men's group coaching  Those with ears, let them hear.  Always love Ryan Connect with Dr. RobertWebsites: https://www.drglover.com/https://integrationnation.net/IG: https://www.instagram.com/tim_duggan/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/RobertGlover?themeRefresh=1Connect with Always Better than YesterdayWebsite: https://abty.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alwaysbetterthanyesterdayuk/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/abty/Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/weareabty  Join our mail list here for exclusive content here:https://abty.co.uk/contact Sign up for our coaching here: https://abty.co.uk/coachingThank you to our supporters Exhale Healthy Coffee.  Exhale is the first coffee to be sourced, roasted and lab tested specifically to maximise its antioxidant and anti-inflammatory potency. An independent lab test showed one cup of Exhale coffee has the same antioxidant power as 1.8kg of blueberries or 55 oranges! Get £10 off your first bag when you visit https://exhalecoffee.com/abty Please email your questions and comments to podcast@abty.co.uk #DrRobertGlover #NoMoreMrNiceGuy #IntegrationNation

Is your mindset holding you back in dating and relationships? In this episode, Charles and Dan kick off a new series exploring Dating Essentials for Men by Dr. Robert Glover. They dive deep into the impact of core beliefs on dating success, discussing:✅ The definition and characteristics of “bad daters”✅ Common self-limiting beliefs that sabotage relationships✅ How shame influences dating struggles✅ The role of social confidence in romantic success✅ Why challenging your beliefs is essential for personal growthIf you've ever felt frustrated with your dating life or relationships, this episode will help you identify and break free from limiting mindsets holding you back.Key Takeaways

Are you buying into the myth that love should just magically work? Forget fairy tales—real, lasting love takes effort, communication, and intention. In this episode, Charles and Dan break down the final chapter of The Man's Guide to Women and uncover the science-backed secrets to making relationships last.We dive into:✅ The essential ingredient for a strong relationship: Trust✅ Why conflict avoidance is ruining your connection✅ The biggest myths about love (and how they set you up for failure)✅ Small, daily habits to affair-proof your relationship✅ The six-second kiss—does it really work?

In theMen Becoming Better Men Season 8 finale, host Bob Wischer sits down with the legendary Dr. Robert Glover, author ofNo More Mr. Nice Guy and founder ofIntegration Nation, for a powerhouse conversation on breaking free from the "nice guy" trap, reclaiming masculinity, and building true connection.This episode is packed with game-changing insights, including:✅ WhyNo More Mr. Nice Guy has changed the lives of countless men✅ The secret sauce behind strong relationships and authentic masculinity✅ "Gloverisms" that will transform your mindset and daily interactions✅ How community is the missing piece for modern men✅ The importance of getting out of the house, expanding your route, and walking through open doors!!! (My personal favorite)We also dive intoIntegration Nation, Dr. Glover's thriving international men's community, and why every man needs a tribe. If you've ever felt disconnected, frustrated, or like you're coasting through life—this episode is your wake-up call.

Robert Glover est psychothérapeute, coach et auteur du célèbre livre No More Mr. Nice Guy traduit en français "trop gentil pour être heureux".Ce sujet est tellement passionnant qu'il est divisé en 2 parties et vous comprendrez qu'il me parle car je suis totalement un "gentil".Je ne connais personne qui parle en Français aussi bien que Robert Glover mais vous l'aurez compris cet épisode est en anglais.Son travail aide des milliers d'hommes à se libérer du piège du "Nice Guy Syndrome", cet état où l'on cherche constamment à plaire aux autres au détriment de son propre bien-être.Dans cet épisode, nous parlons de ce qu'il y a de problématique à être "trop gentil" et pourquoi la gentillesse excessive peut souvent être une forme déguisée de manipulation et de peur du rejet. J'ai questionné Robert sur les différences fondamentales entre être "nice" et être "kind", comment savoir si nous sommes authentiques ou simplement en quête d'approbation, et surtout, comment sortir de cette spirale.Nous avons aussi abordé les dynamiques de genre, la pression culturelle sur les hommes et les femmes, et l'impact du Nice Guy Syndrome sur les relations amoureuses. Pourquoi certains hommes ont-ils tant de mal à s'affirmer ? Comment rééquilibrer sa masculinité et sa féminité pour être un individu accompli ?Si comme moi, vous avez déjà ressenti de la frustration en cherchant à plaire aux autres, ou si vous vous êtes reconnu dans le schéma de la complaisance à outrance, cet épisode vous parlera forcément !Voici les questions que l'on traite : Qu'est-ce qui vous a amené à écrire No More Mr. Nice Guy ?Quelle est la différence entre être "nice" et être "kind" ?Pourquoi les hommes développent-ils ce syndrome du Nice Guy ?Est-ce que les femmes aussi sont touchées par cette dynamique ?Comment savoir si l'on est authentique ou si l'on cherche juste à plaire ?Quel est le lien entre le Nice Guy Syndrome et la peur du conflit ?Pourquoi l'évitement du conflit est-il un piège ?Comment le Nice Guy Syndrome impacte-t-il les relations amoureuses ?Comment rééquilibrer son masculin et son féminin pour être plus aligné ?Quels sont les premiers pas à faire pour sortir de ce schéma comportemental ?Timelaps : 00:00 – Introduction et découverte du livre No More Mr. Nice Guy02:30 – Pourquoi être "trop gentil" est un problème05:45 – Différence entre être "nice" et être "kind"10:20 – Le lien entre le Nice Guy Syndrome et la peur du rejet15:00 – Comment repérer si l'on est un Nice Guy20:10 – Le piège du "covert contract" : donner pour recevoir25:45 – Masculin, féminin : rééquilibrer ses énergies30:30 – L'impact des nouvelles dynamiques hommes-femmes sur les relations35:50 – Sortir du Nice Guy Syndrome : conseils pratiques40:15 – Conclusion et ressources pour aller plus loin

Robert Glover est psychothérapeute, coach et auteur du célèbre livre No More Mr. Nice Guy traduit en français "trop gentil pour être heureux".Ce sujet est tellement passionnant qu'il est divisé en 2 parties et vous comprendrez qu'il me parle car je suis totalement un "gentil".Je ne connais personne qui parle en Français aussi bien que Robert Glover mais vous l'aurez compris cet épisode est en anglais.Son travail aide des milliers d'hommes à se libérer du piège du "Nice Guy Syndrome", cet état où l'on cherche constamment à plaire aux autres au détriment de son propre bien-être.Dans cet épisode, nous parlons de ce qu'il y a de problématique à être "trop gentil" et pourquoi la gentillesse excessive peut souvent être une forme déguisée de manipulation et de peur du rejet. J'ai questionné Robert sur les différences fondamentales entre être "nice" et être "kind", comment savoir si nous sommes authentiques ou simplement en quête d'approbation, et surtout, comment sortir de cette spirale.Nous avons aussi abordé les dynamiques de genre, la pression culturelle sur les hommes et les femmes, et l'impact du Nice Guy Syndrome sur les relations amoureuses. Pourquoi certains hommes ont-ils tant de mal à s'affirmer ? Comment rééquilibrer sa masculinité et sa féminité pour être un individu accompli ?Si comme moi, vous avez déjà ressenti de la frustration en cherchant à plaire aux autres, ou si vous vous êtes reconnu dans le schéma de la complaisance à outrance, cet épisode vous parlera forcément !Voici les questions que l'on traite : Qu'est-ce qui vous a amené à écrire No More Mr. Nice Guy ?Quelle est la différence entre être "nice" et être "kind" ?Pourquoi les hommes développent-ils ce syndrome du Nice Guy ?Est-ce que les femmes aussi sont touchées par cette dynamique ?Comment savoir si l'on est authentique ou si l'on cherche juste à plaire ?Quel est le lien entre le Nice Guy Syndrome et la peur du conflit ?Pourquoi l'évitement du conflit est-il un piège ?Comment le Nice Guy Syndrome impacte-t-il les relations amoureuses ?Comment rééquilibrer son masculin et son féminin pour être plus aligné ?Quels sont les premiers pas à faire pour sortir de ce schéma comportemental ?Timelaps : 00:00 – Introduction et découverte du livre No More Mr. Nice Guy02:30 – Pourquoi être "trop gentil" est un problème05:45 – Différence entre être "nice" et être "kind"10:20 – Le lien entre le Nice Guy Syndrome et la peur du rejet15:00 – Comment repérer si l'on est un Nice Guy20:10 – Le piège du "covert contract" : donner pour recevoir25:45 – Masculin, féminin : rééquilibrer ses énergies30:30 – L'impact des nouvelles dynamiques hommes-femmes sur les relations35:50 – Sortir du Nice Guy Syndrome : conseils pratiques40:15 – Conclusion et ressources pour aller plus loin

Send us a textDr. Robert Glover is a distinguished therapist, coach, speaker, and educator with over four decades of expertise in relationships. He is the acclaimed author of "No More Mr. Nice Guy," a groundbreaking work that has transformed the lives of countless men worldwide. Through his books, workshops, and consultations, Dr. Glover empowers individuals to achieve fulfillment in love, sex, and life. Connect with Robert! https://x.com/dr_r_glover?lang=en Connect with Us!https://www.instagram.com/alchemists.library/https://twitter.com/RyanJAyala

In this episode, Eli Weinstein sits down with Dr. Robert Glover, the renowned author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, to explore the complexities of modern masculinity. Dr. Glover shares insights from his personal journey, how cultural influences shape male identity, and the struggles many men face in relationships, work, and personal growth. They discuss:✅ The ‘Nice Guy Syndrome'—why men struggle with people-pleasing and self-sabotage.✅ The evolving definition of masculinity and how men can embrace both strength and vulnerability.✅ The role of women in male development and the importance of polarity in relationships.✅ How modern boys are raised to suppress their masculine energy—and what that means for future generations.✅ The necessity of masculine initiation, safe spaces for emotional expression, and building strong male connections. If you've ever questioned what it means to be a man in today's world, this conversation is for you. Dr. Glover provides a roadmap for men to break free from outdated conditioning, embrace their authentic selves, and cultivate deeper relationships.

Today, we're cutting through the clutter with Dr. Robert Glover, author od "No More Mr. Nice Guy". Instead of spreading ourselves thin, we'll learn how to stick to our goals and ignore the distractions. Dr, Glover will share easy-to-follow strategies to help us stay focused and finish what we begin, turning fleeting interests into real achievements. Tune in to transform the way you tackle your projects and plans!

Today, we're cutting through the clutter with Dr. Robert Glover, author od "No More Mr. Nice Guy". Instead of spreading ourselves thin, we'll learn how to stick to our goals and ignore the distractions. Dr, Glover will share easy-to-follow strategies to help us stay focused and finish what we begin, turning fleeting interests into real achievements. Tune in to transform the way you tackle your projects and plans!

In this insightful video, Dennis Thompson tackles the complexities of modern masculinity and relationships, offering expert insights and practical advice for men navigating today's evolving societal landscape. From defining "true masculinity" to understanding the challenges of dating, Dennis covers essential topics that will help men build stronger connections, boost self-awareness, and foster meaningful relationships.0:00 Introduction00:18 How do you define "true masculine" in today's evolving societal landscape? 10:15 Why do men get put into the friend zone? 13:19 How should men approach women they want to date or be in a relationship with?24:11 What does the lack pill" mean, and what does high value truly represent?34:12 How do you differentiate between seeking validation, band and seeking connection?51:42 The importance of having a strong male group to build, connect and be vulnerable with each other.→ CONTACT DR. ROBERT GLOVER SOCIAL MEDIA ←WEBSITE: https://www.drglover.com/FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/drrobertglover/LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-robert-glover-2421428/YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@Integration_Nation

Why do so many men feel trapped by the need to please others, avoid conflict, and seek constant validation—and how can they break free? Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, unpacks the roots of "Nice Guy Syndrome," revealing how covert contracts, suppressed needs, and the fear of rejection keep men stuck in unfulfilling cycles. We explore the path to healthy masculinity through self-acceptance, authenticity, and connecting with others, as Dr. Glover shares practical insights and his own journey to embracing a more empowered, purposeful life. Buy Dr. Robert Glover's book here: https://www.drglover.com/no-more-mr-nice-guy/the-book.html Timestamps:00:00 - Introduction02:14 - Healthy Masculinity Defined05:35 - Importance of Healthy Masculinity06:50 - The Inner Turmoil of Nice Guys10:37 - Living with Purpose in Daily Life12:01 - Attraction and Masculine Energy13:27 - The Challenge of Modern Dating15:04 - The Black Pill Phenomenon18:06 - The Impact of Shame on Men19:10 - The Nice Guy Syndrome Explained24:45 - The Roots of Nice Guy Behavior28:15 - The Cycle of Nice Guy Behavior32:09 - The Importance of Authenticity34:20 - The Paradox of Being Nice38:44 - Exploring Sexuality and Authenticity40:41 - The Manipulation in Modern Dating

According to PBS News, American men are experiencing what has been termed a "friendship recession." Currently, 20 percent of single men report that they do not have any close friends, and more than half of all men feel dissatisfied with the size of their friend groups.   Only 21 percent of men receive emotional support from friends on a weekly basis, compared to 41 percent of women. Among men under the age of 30, 15 percent claim they do not have a close friend, a significant increase from just 3 percent in 1990.   Jason Lange is a men's embodiment coach, group facilitator, and evolutionary guide. He helps men gain deeper clarity regarding their life purpose and relationships. Jason believes that every man should participate in a men's group due to the growth and support these groups provide. He is also a certified No More Mr. Nice Guy coach and has trained with influential leaders such as John Wineland, Dr. Robert Glover, Jun Po Roshi, Tripp Lanier, and Ken Wilber.   Many men are currently struggling because the old paradigms of masculinity are no longer relevant or appropriate. Men's work offers a path to discover healthier ways of being in the world, enabling men to shed the outdated "lone wolf" mentality. I began my journey into men's work in my 20s after enduring years of loneliness, discomfort in my body, and difficulty establishing romantic relationships. Over the past 20 years, I have found that men's groups have had the most profound impact on improving my daily life. It has become my mission for every man to join a men's group so they can express themselves more healthily, cultivate meaningful intimate partnerships, and contribute positively to their families and communities.   For more information: https://evolutionary.men/

TODAY’s GUEST IS Dr Robert A. Glover! Today's guest is Dr Robert A. Glover!  Dr. Robert Glover is a relationship expert with over 40 years of professional experience. He is author of four books, including the groundbreaking, No More Mr. Nice Guy and is the founder of Integration Nation, an international community for men. In this interview, we break down... The post #207 Dr Robert Glover on why being nice doesn't get you ahead in life! first appeared on Next Level Guy.

Where did you find inspiration and meaning in 2024? This week sex therapist and friend of the podcast TRACEY COX joins Andrew to reflect on another year of The Meaningful Life, and to discuss the episodes that meant the most to them.  They share highlights from episodes with: Samantha Rodman Whiten (Dr Psych Mom) on Being an Adult Child of Dysfunctional Parents. Jessica Baum on Anxious Attachment. Douglas Thomas on What You Can Learn About Yourself from Your Sexual Fantasies. Robert Glover on People Pleasing Robert Neimeyer on the Six Tasks of Grief Joseph Lee on Jungian Dream Analysis (bonus material) Alan Pearce on Comas and Near-Death Experiences (bonus material).  Subscriber Content This Week  If you're a subscriber to The Meaningful Life (via Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Patreon), this week you'll be hearing:  More things we learned last year and first news on exciting new projects for 2025  AND subscribers also access all of our previous bonus content - a rich trove of insight on love, life and meaning created by Andrew and his interviewees. Follow Up Get Andrew's free guide to difficult conversations with your partner: How to Tell Your Partner Difficult Things  Take a look at Andrew's new online relationship course: My Best Relationship Tools  Buy Great Sex Starts at 50: How to Age-Proof Your Libido by Tracey Cox Get the advice you need on your sex life from Tracey Cox Listen to Tracey Cox and Kelsey Chittick's SexTok podcast Follow Tracey Cox on social media: Instagram, Facebook and Twitter/X. Andrew offers regular advice on love, marriage and finding meaning in your life via his social channels. Follow him on Twitter, Facebook and YouTube @andrewgmarshall 

Jason is a men's embodiment coach, group facilitator, and evolutionary guide. He helps men drop in and wake up to deeper clarity in their life's purpose and relationships. He believes every man should be in a men's group for the growth and support opportunities they provide. Jason applies an integral framework to all his work, drawing on many disciplines and modalities to effectively serve. He has trained with the likes of John Wineland, Dr. Robert Glover, Tripp Lanier, Ken Wilber, and is a Stages International Certified Debriefer. His online program, Pillars of Presence, is a 16-week boot camp for men ready to transform their romantic relationships from the inside out that he co-leads with Melanie Curtin. He also leads twice a year Shadow work-based men's groups with Luke Adler in the Heart of Shadow program. Outside of men's work, Jason is also a filmmaker and is blessed to be married to his amazing wife, Violet, who coaches women on love and femininity, and father to his amazing daughter Ruby.   Find him here: https://evolutionary.men/about-jason-lange/ https://www.facebook.com/evolutionarymenswork https://www.instagram.com/evolutionarymen/ https://www.youtube.com/@evolutionarymen https://www.tiktok.com/@evolutionarymen

In this episode, Charles and Dan tackle the often-overlooked topic of female anatomy with a mix of humor and practical insights. From debunking common myths to encouraging open communication in the bedroom, this episode dives deep into the anatomy lessons many of us missed in school. If you're looking to strengthen intimacy, increase your confidence, and become a better partner, this one's for you.

In No More Mr. Nice Guy, Robert Glover talks about how some radical feminists claimed that men were the cause of all of the problems in the world. Or that men were merely an unnecessary nuisance.  This contributed to a climate that convinced many men that it was not OK to be just who they were.  

In the pantheon of self-development thought leaders for men, no one looms larger than Dr. Robert Glover. A therapist, coach and public speaker for 30 years, Dr. Glover has helped countless men transform from passive and resentful to empowered and confident. His bestselling book, “No More Nice Guy,” is a self-help classic, sharing the same rarified air as David Deida's “The Way of the Superior Man” and Brene Brown's “Daring Greatly.”In this encore episode of the How to Get a Girlfriend Podcast, dating coach Connell Barrett and Dr. Glover—author of “The Dating Essentials for Men”—will discuss:(5:03) How Connell's Nerdy Client Ken Got His Very First Kiss Ever(12:19) A Simple Tip on How to Always Know What to Say to Women(19:57) Dr. Glover Reveals Why “Nice Guy Syndrome” Is Hurting Your Love Life(26:20) How Dr. Glover Cracked the Code in His Own Dating Life(30:33) How Shame Can Hurt Your Self-Esteem(34:22) Why Indian and Asian Men Struggle with Dating in the U.S.(42:11) Why a Woman Wants a Little “Caveman” in the Guy She Dates(43:35) How to Confident and Strong without Being an A-Hole(50:22) Dr. Glover's Formula to Be a Man of “Loving Dominance”(55:11) Why Rejection is Good for You(1:01:03) How to Stop Feeling Needy with Women(1:07:01) The Easy Way to Get a Woman's Phone Number(1:09:45) Dr. Glover's Top Tip to Stay out of the Friend ZoneAre you ready to stop being “Mr. Nice Guy” and start being the man women want you to be? Listen now, and take one step closer to getting a great girlfriend!TO LEARN ABOUT DR. GLOVER'S COACHING, COURSES AND HIS BOOK, “DATING ESSENTIALS FOR MEN”http://www.drglover.comFOLLOW DR. GLOVER ON TWITTER/Xhttp://www.twitter.com/dr_r_gloverFOR A FREE STRATEGY CALL WITH CONNELL TO LEARN HOW TO CONFIDENTLY FLIRT WITH WOMEN BY BEING AUTHENTIC (NO SKETCHY PICKUP MOVES NEEDED):http://www.datingtransformation.com/contactTO GET FREE ACCESS TO “THE FLIRTY 30,” 30 CHARMING QUESTIONS TO ASK WOMEN ON DATES, ON THE APPS, AND WHEN YOU APPROACH:http://www.datingtransformation.com/FLIRTY30

Robert Glover: The Hidden Why Interview Robert Glover, a family and relationship psychologist, discussed his journey and insights on men's health and relationships. He highlighted the shift from traditional masculinity to a more complex understanding of masculinity, influenced by feminism and social media. Glover emphasised the importance of men connecting with other men to fill … Continue reading Episode 1116: Navigating the Shifting Landscape of Men's Health and Relationships with Dr. Robert Glover

Fellas, Today's episode is my last in a series with Dr. Robert Glover who will be bringing his expertise to FRD Live in Austin, December 4-6th.  This episode dives deep into why Brotherhood is more crucial than ever. We explore: Why Men Are Struggling: The hidden fears that keep men from forming deep bonds, and how modern society makes it easy to retreat into isolation. The Healing Power of Brotherhood: How being around other men—men who hold you accountable, support you, and just be with you—can transform your life. Overcoming Discomfort: The necessity of stepping out of your comfort zone to build genuine connections and how masculine initiation plays a role in this. Practical Steps to Connection: Ways to become the spark in your circle, create meaningful friendships, and build a lasting brotherhood. Why This Matters:Our world often tells men to go it alone, but the truth is, we need each other to become our best selves. This conversation is a wake-up call for men to find or create spaces where they can be vulnerable, strong, and supported by other men.   More About Front Row Dads Connect with us @ FrontRowDad.com & Instagram  Want to hang out with other FRDs in Austin? Watch this 3-min video from our last Front Row Dads Live event. Tickets avaiable now for December's event.  Not able to travel?  We got you. Join our next online event, built just for kickass dads who know there's more to learn. FrontRowDads.com/summit  FRD is solving a huge problem for dads. Our culture has turned “Dad” into a joke. Go ahead, google Dad and you'll find Dad Bod, Dad Jokes, Dad Weed, etc. Culturally, it's a Homer Simpson mentality, and it's BS.    Our community is built for solid men. Men with range. Those who are badass, and know there's still more to learn, together.   Most guys find it hard to find “their crew.” Finding other committed men, who are successful in life, and want to put family first – these guys are rare. Is this you?  In FRD, hundreds of men from all over the world show up for each other, to share resources and raise the bar of fatherhood (our core values.) If you're reading this, you want to grow.  Podcasts are great, but guys… when you're ready to stop just listening to content, and want to JOIN the conversations – the FRD brotherhood is ready for you.   One more thing…  Has this podcast helped you? If so, please tell us how we're doing. Please take a minute and leave a review. Seriously, they matter. Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.  Subscribe to this show on Apple Podcasts | Spotify

We cover a lot in this 24 min episode on boundaries.   Dr. Robert Glover is a seasoned marriage and family therapist, he takes us on a crash course to understand why boundaries are more than just lines—they're essential tools for creating authentic and meaningful relationships. Main Topics Covered:  Why Boundaries Matter: How setting them is crucial for emotional safety and self-respect. Misunderstandings About Boundaries: Why they aren't about pushing people away but inviting deeper connection. Practical Exercises: A powerful demonstration that transformed our guest's understanding of personal space. The Cultural Influence: How societal norms have shaped our beliefs about asserting ourselves. Boundaries in All Relationships: From family dynamics to intimate partnerships and even friendships. If you got a lot out of this episode, Dr. Robert Glover will be facilitating at FRD Live in Austin, Texas, December 4th-6th. Would love to see you there. Enjoy the show Jon   _____________________ Get the Full Show Notes Want access to the full show notes, including links to all resources mentioned during today's conversation? Visit FrontRowDads.com/465 More About Front Row Dads Connect with us @ FrontRowDads.com & Instagram  Want to hang out with other FRDs in Austin? Watch this 3-min video from our last Front Row Dads Live event. Tickets avail now for December's event.  Not able to travel? We got you. Join our next online event, built just for kickass dads who know there's more to learn. FrontRowDads.com/summit  FRD is solving a huge problem for dads. Our culture has turned “Dad” into a joke. Go ahead, google Dad and you'll find Dad Bod, Dad Jokes, Dad Weed, etc. Culturally, it's a Homer Simpson mentality, and it's BS.   Our community is built for solid men. Men with range. Those who are badass, and know there's still more to learn, together.   Most guys find it hard to find “their crew.” Finding other committed men, who are successful in life, and want to put family first – these guys are rare. Is this you? In FRD, hundreds of men from all over the world show up for each other, to share resources and raise the bar of fatherhood (our core values) If you're reading this, you want to grow.  Podcasts are great, but guys… when you're ready to stop just listening to content, and want to JOIN the conversations – the FRD brotherhood is ready for you.   One more thing…  Has this podcast helped you? If so, please tell us how we're doing. Please take a minute and leave a review. Seriously, they matter. Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.  Subscribe to this show on Apple Podcasts | Spotify

In this episode, Ralph examines the changes men undergo when shifting from "nice guys" to more confident "alpha males." He discusses how a personal crisis often triggers this transformation, referencing Dr. Robert Glover's "No More Mr. Nice Guy." Ralph analyzes how today's dating world rewards confidence and extroversion, though sometimes at the expense of sincerity and emotional connection.Join The HFM Brotherhood!

In this 16 minute gem with FRD Live facilitator Dr. Robert Glover, best selling author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, we go into how embodying your fullest self naturally attracts the feminine energy in your life and what it takes to be the guy at the concert enjoying the show. Here's a taste of what you'll learn: Why the feminine is deeply drawn to a man who's confident, knows where he's going, and enjoys the journey. Simple practices to get grounded and shed the self-doubt and shame that hold you back. How to stop overthinking and truly enjoy the moment (even when life gets chaotic). Techniques like “being where your feet are” to stay present, centered, and fully engaged. The surprising link between spending time with other men and attracting the feminine.   Dr. Robert Glover will be facilitating at FRDL so if you get a lot out of this episode and are ready to dive into investing in your well-being, join us at FRD Live in Austin, Texas, December 4th-6th.     To bring you more focused, time-efficient content, we've divided my full interview with Dr. Glover into three parts, releasing over the next few days. (If you prefer shorter content, please reply and let me know!)   Enjoy the show,   Jon   P.S. This Google doc has 10 insights from this episode.      Get the Full Show Notes Want access to the full show notes, including links to all resources mentioned during today's conversation? Visit FrontRowDads.com/464 More About Front Row Dads Connect with us @ FrontRowDads.com & Instagram  Want to hang out with other FRDs in Austin? Watch this 3-min video from our last Front Row Dads Live event. Tickets avail now for December's event.  Not able to travel? We got you. Join our next online event, built just for kickass dads who know there's more to learn. FrontRowDads.com/summit  FRD is solving a huge problem for dads. Our culture has turned “Dad” into a joke. Go ahead, google Dad and you'll find Dad Bod, Dad Jokes, Dad Weed, etc. Culturally, it's a Homer Simpson mentality, and it's BS.   Our community is built for solid men. Men with range. Those who are badass, and know there's still more to learn, together.   Most guys find it hard to find “their crew.” Finding other committed men, who are successful in life, and want to put family first – these guys are rare. Is this you? In FRD, hundreds of men from all over the world show up for each other, to share resources and raise the bar of fatherhood (our core values) If you're reading this, you want to grow.  Podcasts are great, but guys… when you're ready to stop just listening to content, and want to JOIN the conversations – the FRD brotherhood is ready for you.   One more thing…  Has this podcast helped you? If so, please tell us how we're doing. Please take a minute and leave a review. Seriously, they matter. Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.  Subscribe to this show on Apple Podcasts | Spotify

We explore the needs of men and women with Dr. Robert Glover, an experienced therapist, coach, speaker, and educator with over 40 years of experience in relationship dynamics. As the author of the impactful book “No More Mr. Nice Guy”, Dr. Glover has helped thousands of men worldwide transform their lives and achieve their goals in relationships, sex, and careers.Dr. Robert and I dive into…➝ The inherent roles of masculinity and femininity➝ Reassessing our expectations in intimate relationships➝ Why men need other men's support and accountability➝ Understanding feminine need and complaint➝ Identifying your personal signs of energetic imbalanceREFERENCEDNo More Mr. Nice Guy: https://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-Guy-audiobook/dp/B078927ZYL/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1K91Y9F0PT12S&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.QIC_gerneNw8_uJnLjW-mxdHeIp0HlBgdXM1YlXHE_tDYSqOcSNf4QsPJVZiZZLbBAi6Ph7KJcuTCigttKe5lHSYpHxA_C6ET9xDiU-XL6kfWG70tyiLvNWxNAbn-adAwHDVxAE1Tdw-brFkkdl4ISTfxu_B6D0TNeY_Du30To_4m07Hm22IN8b3DET7jPtdH2HVL28RPD7kpPFBMSCsUWEIbu-TxBU28ETKpMFEPiE.Qt1mnRTDLMmNCyTqpGcQWepWr6Ht6nGRivW3AONzIvE&dib_tag=se&keywords=no+more+mr+nice+guy+robert+glover&qid=1730221203&sprefix=no+more+mr+n%2Caps%2C156&sr=8-1The Way of The Superior Man: https://www.amazon.com/The-Way-of-Superior-Man-audiobook/dp/B07FXZBYJ9/ref=sr_1_1?crid=154ID1YUCQYM&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.wBt6Q4IVaRKXD91Xo-oBsU4z_OL3mZHpXBm7jXdNdCMhSjjm1iGgwe1HJbeXMKRndMKyfL04CgDSwiQbJiC-MV_QSNUDxXXcmgMApW-U-t4QuzihrFz7hSOopYVuy0DyjQxKQP_iT_OK5CGxA9JSqNDsa7BWaL8D_BPBavk03zKALprr_-7-yc2lZNpuA7hnTg9-woXEdEFWZJlOVUhiXXfp0NLarYO0KVdVydL3jvPi2nwvfVBdYQzmUtUIdrRZEhA9HIHIcexNgiB-u0gls75S4YM4JF111_xI1wUUkyE.DTfKaJpkdiIDNXxOL0mC7M3oFQlu7cw-h_lmhOjQgmA&dib_tag=se&keywords=david+deida&qid=1727794254&sprefix=david+de%2Caps%2C202&sr=8-1The 5 Love Languages: https://www.amazon.com/Five-Love-Languages-Secret-Lasts/dp/B079B7PJMV/ref=sr_1_1?crid=KA3DK4D40XCZ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.onAW4Nh3ygw4vWihSBaJlIzjzCe4Ss5U5P2lfA8lLoF8meumyYh7whzdEMOAMEJhdqje3RfBEANOHNwEkwNQk5qb_24lqMCp7MTR_Myr4huq93rTKnHEcsV5qnu9UMQbS-ERnMisQyc_ypX1pbzFKog8lqZxvWJaB6bjFcOJzS3n-_YtgCbPuDltz2MHSQeZ-F87mfySkQ0gIrghxBF5LSy2X50Hg5YSpLpwqY25r80.9gde2x-uAJgDbV6KGqpi22hrdJGmvjTUgm39odZK-MI&dib_tag=se&keywords=the+5+love+languages+book&qid=1730221225&s=audible&sprefix=the+5+love+l%2Caudible%2C130&sr=1-1CONNECT WITH DR. GLOVERWebsite: https://www.drglover.comCONNECT WITH CALInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/cal.callahan/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thegreatunlearnYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/thegreatunlearn/Website: https://www.thegreatunlearn.comSubscribe to the newsletter: https://www.thegreatunlearn.com/newsletter

Dr. Robert Glover is the author of the bestseller “No More Mr. Nice Guy” and is a seasoned therapist, coach, speaker, and educator with more than 40 years of expertise in relationships.    I wanted to have Robert on the show to discuss loneliness in entrepreneurship and how we can attack these problems through community instead of prolonging them.   It is more important now than ever to unite as entrepreneurs and help each other.   Head to https://capitalism.com/playbook to download the Free Playbook to start on your own road to $1M and beyond.   To get on the waitlist for the Capitalism Accelerator, head to https://capitalism.com/launch   Connect with me on Instagram at https://instagram.com/ryandanielmoran   Timestamps:   (00:00) - The Male Entrepreneur's Challenge   (02:00) - Changes in Masculinity Over 25 Years    (06:05) - Growing Up Without Male Initiation    (09:10) - The Power of Pursuing Challenge    (14:20) - Building Your Support Structure    (21:30) - Understanding Needs vs Neediness    (25:10) - Clear Communication in Relationships    (31:45) - Renegotiating Relationships    (38:40) - Managing Expectations    (41:20) - Masculine & Feminine Energy    (48:55) - The Clarity of Making Decisions    (53:10) - Integration of Masculine/Feminine    (59:30) - Finding Purpose Through Challenge    (1:10:50) - The Two-and-a-Half Things Rule    (1:15:40) - Checking Your Key Life Ingredients    (1:23:15) - Avoiding the Money-Only Trap    (1:29:45) - The Long Game: 25 Years of Hustle   (1:34:10) - Closing Thoughts: Building Long-Term Success-Term 

Dr. Robert Glover, renowned relationship expert and author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, shares insights on modern medicine, psychedelics, and overcoming the “Nice Guy” syndrome. He delves into the effects of shame on sexual desire and how healing from this can improve relationships. Dr. Glover also discusses the dynamics between partners and what defines the perfect partner. Tune in for a transformative conversation about emotional expression and relational healing. ========== OUR GUEST ========== Dr. Robert Glover is a relationship expert with over 40 years of professional experience. He is the author of four books, including the groundbreaking, No More Mr. Nice Guy and is the founder of Integration Nation, an international community for men. ================== DR. ROBERT GLOVER ================== ▶️ YT

Sometimes our childhood experiences make us WAY too good at overlooking our own needs, prompting us to "donate" all our time and effort to the life of someone else, who can't or won't return the favor. One kind of emotional unavailability, defined in the book “No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover, is a man who is what he calls “monogamous with his mother.” This is a deep kind of dysfunction that only the man himself could ever fix. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who loves such a man. My response may not be what she wants to hear. Watch Out For These Dating Red Flags DOWNLOAD WORKSHEET: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3T7surQ

In this episode of the Rising Man Podcast, host Jeddy Azuma explores the origins and evolution of the men's movement alongside esteemed guests Dr. Robert Glover, John Somerville, and Tom Magee. They discuss what it takes to become a man that others trust, emphasizing honesty, accountability, and integrity as core values. The conversation dives into the personal journeys of each guest, reflecting on decades of experience in leading men's groups and mentoring younger men. They also highlight the importance of modeling these qualities for the next generation, ensuring that trustworthiness and responsibility are passed down. The episode offers deep insights into the power of men's work and its ongoing relevance in today's world. Rising Man Links: Instagram || @risingmanmovement & @jeddyazuma YouTube || The Rising Man Movement Website || RisingMan.org

In today's episode of Men's Therapy Podcast, host Marc Azoulay sits down with Dr. Robert Glover. He is the renowned author of "No More Mr. Nice Guy" and a leading expert on men's issues. Dr. Glover discusses his transformation from a "nice guy" to promoting genuine masculinity. He now advocates for building healthy relationships based on authenticity. Dr. Glover's story begins with his relationship struggles. He realized that being "nice" wasn't serving him well. He shares how his second wife's ultimatum pushed him to seek help. This experience inspired him to write his groundbreaking book. As a therapist and through personal experience, Dr. Glover noticed patterns in men who were "too nice." He saw how these behaviours held them back. To address this, he developed strategies to help men break these self-defeating habits. His work now focuses on empowering men to embrace authentic masculinity. The Shadow Side of Nice Guy Syndrome Dr. Glover delves into the darker aspects of Nice Guy Syndrome. He explains that nice guys often aren't as nice as they believe themselves to be. This leads to the development of toxic masculinity over time. He explains that behind their pleasant exteriors, these men often conceal resentment. They may also display passive-aggressive behaviour. Some may even struggle with violent impulses. The root of this behaviour lies in toxic shame and anxiety developed in childhood. "Nice guys have this shame and this anxiety. And what they do, the way that it, the way there, the particular neuroses of nice guy syndrome shows up is through two ways. One, trying to become what we think other people want us to be, to be liked and loved and get our needs met. So, we're chameleons," Dr. Glover explains. Identifying Needs and Wants One of the key challenges for nice guys is recognizing and expressing their own needs and wants. Dr. Glover offers practical advice for men struggling with this issue. He advises men to start by recalling activities they enjoyed as a child. He guides them to focus on their basic needs as well as emotional needs. Men need to understand the distinction between needs and wants. By practising giving to yourself instead of always giving to others, this can be achieved. Dr. Glover emphasizes the importance of "cooperative reciprocal relationships" in meeting one's needs. He encourages men to surround themselves with people. And resources that can help them fulfil their needs and wants in a mutually beneficial way. Role of Women in Men's Development While the focus is primarily on men's growth, Dr. Glover addresses the role women can play in supporting nice guys' development. He suggests that women can offer constructive feedback when necessary. They can be supportive and reinforcing when men make efforts to change. They can work on being better listeners and more attentive to men's emotional cues. But, Dr. Glover stresses that the primary responsibility for change lies with men themselves. Future of Men's Development Dr. Glover expresses optimism about the future of men's development. He notes the increasing availability of resources and communities for men seeking growth. He envisions a new generation of men who are more conscious and open-hearted. They are powerful and fierce, yet connected. They are in touch with their dark side and are joyful and receptive in life. "We're gonna make a fucking dent in the universe. We're gonna make a difference in this world. And, I see that happening," Dr. Glover enthuses. Conclusion This episode of the Men's Therapy Podcast offers invaluable insights for men looking to overcome Nice Guy Syndrome. It offers guidance to develop healthier, more authentic relationships. Dr. Glover's decades of experience and wisdom offer hope for men struggling with these issues. He highlights the importance of taking responsibility for one's needs and wants. Men must recognize the value of cooperative reciprocal relationships. This allows the need for men to step into their role as conscious, open-hearted leaders. Dr. Glover's optimism about the future of men's development is infectious. He envisions a generation of integrated men who can make a significant positive impact on the world. As we look to the future, it's evident that the work of overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome is more relevant than ever. There is a rise in passivity among younger generations. Hence there's a growing need for resources and communities. Ones that can guide men towards a more authentic and fulfilling expression of masculinity. By seeking out supportive group therapies, men can work towards becoming more integrated. They can become authentic versions of themselves. This will benefit not only their own lives but also their relationships and the world around them. About Dr. Robert Glover Dr. Robert Glover is a renowned psychotherapist, author, and speaker. He has dedicated his career to helping men overcome Nice Guy Syndrome. He guides them to develop healthier relationships. His groundbreaking book, "No More Mr. Nice Guy," has sold millions of copies worldwide. It has been translated into many languages. With over 30 years of experience in the field, Dr. Glover has become a leading voice in men's personal development. He holds a Ph.D. in Marriage and Family Therapy. He helps men healthily tackle relationship dynamics. He has worked with thousands of men to help them break free from self-defeating patterns. And embrace their authentic selves. Besides his clinical work and writing, Dr. Glover leads workshops, seminars, and online communities. This includes his men's program called 'Integration Nation'. His approach combines psychological insights with practical strategies. This helps men to become more confident, assertive, and fulfilled in all areas of their lives. Resources Discussed "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Dr. Robert Glover Integration Nation men's program Dr. Glover's website No More Mr. Nice Guy Website Connect with Dr. Robert Glover LinkedIn Facebook YouTube

ounseling Associates and a therapist specialized in porn & sex addiction, betrayal trauma for partners, and childhood trauma. David's work focuses on helping men in these areas as well as assertiveness training. David always had an interest in people as he watched his mom as a hairstylist listen to her clients. He earned his undergraduate degree in Psychology but found himself in sales after college. After some psychological testing, he learned that he would be a good therapist, so he returned to school to get his Master's in Counseling. His career started off in home therapy by using a system approach of not only working with the child but with the parents as well. He got into addictions work focuses on substances but shifted gears when he had a client with a porn addiction. This client fueled David to learn more. David trained at the International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals as well as complementary methods of EMDR and Brainspotting. "You can think of counseling like that; someone is going to listen to you, not judge you, hear you out, and try to work together with you like a coach even though they may do it a little deeper to be able to help you with those deper wounds and live a life you really want to live." Through his work he has found that men put themselves through a lot of pressure to have it all and know it all which could lead to engaging in unhealthy behaviors. His work helps men shed these behaviors and discover the root of what has happened to them. He believes that porn addiction is easy to slip into based on the 3 As; Anonymity, Accessibility, and Affordability. The latest research has found that the highest users of porn are ages 12-17. Seeking treatment is hard for men because they don't get vulnerable with their friends and portrayal of men in society as "tough guys." For many men, it feels embarrassing and scary to get help and for some they worry it will affect their job status. As a society, boys and men are raised and told to let it go, move on, and it will be ok making it even more hard to ask for help. David has found that the men he work with fear not being enough and have never learned to ask for their needs to be met. "A lot of men are taught to stuff their feelings, suck it in, be happy, that's the only approved emotion, they can be angry if they are on the soccer field or football field but nowhere else, and that their feelings don't matter, that's for girls, and that could be so far from the truth. It's a human thing." Gabor Mate's definition of addiction is "a behavior or substance a person does that in the short term provides relief, pleasure, and escape. In the long term, it provides more problems and consequences coupled with the inability to stop it or stop it for long." David has seen sex and porn addiction come in many forms such as massage parlors, strip clubs, etc. When men first start treatment with him, they determine if the behavior is a problem and then assess how deep of a problem it is and what level of care is appropriate for him. From there, he helps them stop the behavior and assess the needs of their spouse and partner as well as getting them support if needed. Finally he helps them develop coping skills and learn how to set boundaries. A unique offering that Charlotte Counseling Associates offers is therapy groups for men to connect and help support one another. David also offers intensive options such as half-day, full-day, or up to 3 days of work. He strongly believes in meeting people where they are and finding the right match of a therapist with his full staff. Room to Heal is another resource in Charlotte that many of his clients have taken advantage of as a residential center for those with sex and porn addiction. "These guys just don't know how to express their needs and that's why they get caught up in these unhealthy behaviors. They are trying to meet their needs that provide an escape from the pain or maybe a dopamine boost in the short term because of the pressure." David believes it is important for the betrayed partner to seek treatment whether they stay in the relationship or not. A common trend that he has witnessed is the person who is addicted gets all of the attention and support. The partner needs support as well as to know it's not their fault. They may have PTSD and need trauma processing as well as work on setting boundaries and utilizing coping skills. His practice has a betrayed partners group as well. He can facilitate a formal disclosure session where the partner who is addicted will share their sexual timeline and the betrayed partner can ask questions. He has found that this type of session can be helpful in the betrayed partner deciding the future of the relationship. David describes talk therapy as utilizing the prefrontal cortex to explore thoughts and feelings and provides immediate relief. Some of the deeper methods he uses of EMDR and Brainspotting work on resourcing which is the ability to self-soothe. He describes EMDR(Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) as a brain-body therapy that gets into the deeper parts of the brain attached to our nervous system. In this work, the client reprocesses traumatic material to clen up the wound and make it not as painful while introducing a positive belief. He describes Brainspotting as more of an eye-fixation modality where they have found that where you look is how you feel. The practitioner finds a point in space that is most activating and talking it out as the wound dissipates. David finds that assertiveness training includes learning how to be calm, direct, and respectful in communication. David has followed Robert Glover's work and book called "No More Mr. Nice Guy." The idea is that men do a lot of nice things but don't meet their own needs. Inevitably the get run down and don't do nice things such as yelling, shutting down, pornography, etc. These men don't feel they have the right to ask for what they need. This work can be done in individual therapy or his assertiveness groups. David has many things that keep him grounded outside of his work as a therapist. Mostly therapy and being a part of therapist support groups, his faith, family, music, meditation, journaling, being in nature, working out, and yoga. He would like to Heal Charlotte by spreading the positive message about therapy and provide the community with education on sex and porn addiction. You can connect with David and his practice, Charlotte Counseling Associates, through their website, by calling them at 980-224-3233, emailing admin@charlottecounselors.com, or on Instagram, Facebook, and Linkedin.

My dear friend Richard will any day now be graduating to glory, which is why I've brought this forward. It was only recorded a fortnight ago but things have progressed fast, and I'd love him to have the pleasure perhaps of listening to this and knowing it has blessed and challenged us before he breathes his last this side of the veil. His body is ravaged and weakened by years of battling cancer, but his spirit is strong, and his ebbing life is a radical challenge to all of us of what being generous might look like. It's a powerful message.If what you listen to moves you to action, please write to Richard to tell him what you've done about it, richard[@]gsbcomms.co.uk, and I'd love you to cc me in as well for the encouragement if appropriate, simon[@]greatlakesoutreach.org My first podcast with him a couple of years ago tells his life journey, and is well worth the listen: inspired.captivate.fm/episode/acting-up-richard-garnettHis (under 5min poetic) pods (called Jesus Here) are beautiful, and can be accessed on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.He references Robert Glover's amazing work in China, getting over a million orphans integrated into families. That podcast can be listened to here: inspired.captivate.fm/episode/as-many-as-the-stars-robert-glover-obeAlso Ed Michaelson's work in India is an incredible story, which was told here: inspired.captivate.fm/episode/worth-everything-dr-ed-michaelson---Support our work in Burundi: greatlakesoutreach.org/inspired ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠---Weekly episode WhatsApp link: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠greatlakesoutreach.org/whatsappWeekly email notification: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠greatlakesoutreach.org/inspiredemail⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠For more from Simon, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠simonguillebaud.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠---Produced by Great Lakes Outreach - Transforming Burundi & Beyond: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠greatlakesoutreach.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Zach and Larua discuss the downside of Nice Guys with the man who literally wrote the book on it. Dr. Robert Glover wrote No More Mr. Nice Guy over 20 years ago after seeing his relationships crumble even though he was so nice. His sage wisdom will help any man (or woman) stuck in the nice cycle. Check out Dr. Glover at: https://www.drglover.com/ Pick up his book at: https://amzn.to/4d95LER While you are on Amazon pre-order Zach & Laura's new book: https://amzn.to/4ds7XY6 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices