friends on FIRE

the friends on FIRE podcast retired about 312 days ago, and Maggie started a new podcast called Inside Out Money with a rotating set of co-hosts. Inside Out Money is about to launch their 50th episode, and in anticipation of that we're sharing one of our top 10 episodes so far - Episode #24 with Maggie and Greg discussing the surprising truth of early retirement and how they're feeling 500 days into early retirement.

Maggie shares the trailer to her new podcast Inside Out Money, which is now available wherever you listen to podcasts.Visit the Inside Out Money website to learn more, or find it wherever you listen to podcasts.

This week is our final friends on FIRE episode. We share our memories, fun stats, and closing thoughts as we wrap up what has been an amazing experience for both of us. Thank you to everyone who has listened to and supported friends on FIRE over the last 200 episodes!---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In our Q&A, we cover topics such as passion projects versus getting paid for work, sharing our net worth, mechanics of withdrawing money after retirement, when Mike is going to retire from work, prepping finances for having kids, finances for newlyweds and joint accounts, talking to your adult children about money, FedNow, Mike's favorite soap scent, and more!Show References:Friends on FIRE podcast #190 - The financial mechanics of early retirement2023 Financial Checklist (scroll to bottom of page)Friends on FIRE podcast #034 -  Split or Combined Finances---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In our Q&A, we cover topics such as travel hacking updates, friends on FIRE transition, transitioning investments from a financial planner to a new brokerage account, Greg's Tesla story update, how to talk to your adult kids about money, and expensive wedding-related activities.Show References:Book: The Psychology of MoneyFriends on FIRE etsy store---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

The fiends on FIRE podcast shares a BIG announcement, and a special request for all of our listeners.  ---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

As human beings, we all have one thing in common: we have parents! They may not be alive anymore, or we might not like or have a challenging relationship with them, but we all came from someone. And there are things we can proactively do to help our parents and ensure they have their finances and other affairs in order.We discuss several specific things you should consider doing to help your parents.Top 3 takeaways:It is important to have these discussions with your parents.Start thoughtfully and early, as we've advised with all financial discussions.Help get them organized, at the very least, even if you don't do anything to change or tweak their setup.Show References:Get your shit together checklistFriends on FIRE episode #040 - Estate Planning with Elaine LevineFriends on FIRE episode #101 - Friends don't talk about money, but they shouldFriends on FIRE episode #109 - Talking to your partner about moneyFriends on FIRE episode #165 - How to recognize and avoid investment scamsFidelity Aging Well GuideArticle: Smart ways to gift money to children---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

No notes this week! We hope you enjoy the episode. Show References:Article: There's a quicker, cheaper way to go to college, but fewer students are trying it---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

 This is part two of our discussion in episode 192 on toxic career pressure. In the last discussion, we talked about the benefits of jobs with progression and “careers” and the downsides. Next, we share some advice on how to manage those pressures and find happiness where you are in your job:Work to eliminate the need for financial growth.Experiment with your friends and family to see how much they care about your professional accomplishments.Find satisfaction in the tasks.Go the opposite way from sacrifices for your career and seek more flexibility.Surround yourself with like-minded people.Stop comparing yourself to others.Explore activities outside of work where you can find validation, praise, and enjoyment.Create a vision for your whole life and figure out the role work should play in that.Top 3 Takeaways:Everybody goes through this, and having strong feelings of insecurity and doubt is normal.Decide if the race to the top is a race you're genuinely interested in, and if not, step off the track.Your job doesn't define you. The people who care about you will remain there no matter your title.Show References:friends on FIRE podcast #192 - How to let go of toxic career pressure and be happier at work – Part 1---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We explain what happened this last couple of weeks with Silicon Valley Bank and Signature banks collapsing. We discuss how it reminds us of 2008 and what's different this time. And we discuss how and why it happened and what it might mean for you.  Show References:friends on FIRE podcast - #033 - Mike Explains the Economyfriends on FIRE podcast - #173 - Article: 7 ways a recession could be good for you financiallyfriends on FIRE podcast - #180 - Article: Raising the alarm on the US economy---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Having a “career” and a job with progression is, in many ways, a great privilege. You're paid to learn new skills and master them, make friends, influence decisions, and grow as a person. And you're paid for it, sometimes very well. But for many people who work in competitive hierarchical organizations, it's easy to find yourself wanting things that cause anxiety and depression; and we don't even realize why. We go along with the narrative that more is better, that titles are what we want, and that we need to sacrifice pieces of ourselves to get there. If you've ever wondered what it's all for, this episode is for you.It can be a good thing to have aspirations and to grow. You should absolutely spend part of your life growing and spending your time doing something you feel good about. What we are talking about, though, is when we embark on a journey that isn't what we actually want. Some people might really want this out of life, and that's great. Knowing what you want and being happy is a rare gift. Many more people think they want it, but find out too late in life that it didn't really matter to them.You are not your job. And your job doesn't determine your value as a person.Organizations of all complexities need hierarchies. That's how work is managed with structure.In theory, the more challenging the job or, the more value it brings, the more it gets paid. But that's not really how it works in practice with corporations.Hierarchies in both title and compensation are also social cues: how much respect someone is owed, how dedicated they are, and how important their superiors believe they are. And we go through life thinking this stuff is really important because of a few factors:Where does the messaging come from? Ask yourself who is telling you that the better title is important. It's the executives.Why does this messaging exist: two reasons, the first being the ego of the people at the top, but more importantly, it creates obedience to the system. Companies need a pipeline of people to have continued operations, so they need people to want those things. It's not for you, it's for the shareholders.  It gives companies power because when they have something you want, they can get more of you in exchange. You will sacrifice more for it.All of this creates a reality for people where their self-worth and happiness are inextricably linked to their career success. Let's take a step back, though:When we look up an organization, they're all just people. Some are happy, some are miserable. Some are really smart, some aren't. Some started from nothing, some got everything handed to them. They're just normal people.For those of you who've progressed, are you happier now? What are you happier with, and what are you less happy with? Do your closest friends and family care more or less about you because of your title?Have you had to sacrifice something really important, and was that trade-off worth it in retrospect?Are the people who held higher roles still admired now that they're gone?Have you ever been to a funeral where someone talked about their career accomplishments?This affects everybody to some degree.We want what other people haveWe want to be treated fairlyWe want to be recognized and appreciatedWe want our sacrifices to mean somethingTop 3 Takeaways:Careers and progress can be meaningful ways to learn skills, make relationships and grow as a person.Understand, though, if it's really you that wants this or if you are reacting to social pressure.Listen to our next episode if you're struggling with this pressure to hear our advice.

Maggie's top learnings from spending a year researching, signing up for, and using ACA marketplace insurance:Plan ahead, this takes time and research. We discuss how you can price out and see the different plans, how the number and types of plans are quite complicated, some tips regarding the application process, and whether or not you need to work with a broker or rep.Understand the levels of plans. There are bronze, silver, gold, and platinum plans, and they are explained here. Understand how subsidies work, as they can be quite generous if you're not working or on a low income. We explain how the subsidies work, how you can estimate your AGI (adjusted gross income), what happens if you misestimate your AGI, and how you can proactively manage your AGI.   Understand how cost-sharing reductions work.  The cost-sharing reductions are clutch  and only available on the silver plans.You're likely going to need to change doctors and maybe even adjust medications. This is OK. A lot of things are going to change for you in early retirement, and in the grand scheme of things, these are doable changes. We recommend consulting with existing doctors and being very detailed oriented about which doctors and medications are covered in which plans.Fight for your rights and ask questions and double-triple-check! If the marketplace says a doctor is covered and the doctor says they aren't, do more research on both ends.We wrap up this episode by sharing what Maggie and Greg are paying for 2023 insurance premiums.  Top 3 Takeaways:Your options for medical insurance are not limited to employer-sponsored plans.  Insurance on the marketplace can be quite affordable if you're truly retired and/or living on a lower income.Do your research and plan ahead.  Learn about and understand the subsidies and cost-sharing reductions. This is what makes marketplace insurance affordable.  Show References:friends on FIRE podcast #118 - It's benefits season! So how do you pick the right ones?friends on FIRE podcast #139 - Medical insurance in early retirement (part 3 of 5)friends on FIRE podcast #128 - Creative ways to save on medical expensesA one-page guide to the MarketplaceLearn more about healthcare.govs plan categoriesShop Healthcare.gov - See plans + prices---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

A reminder of how early retirement works:You know your math. You know what it costs to live for a year, your net worth, and other key future financial needs.  You save up enough money to fund the rest of your life.  You really need compound interest at work to do this effectively. We talk through the 4% rule or 25X rule, end-of-life planning spreadsheet and concept, and more.You keep your cost of living low.  This might include getting debt-free.The different levers that could be available for income during early retirement:CashDeferred compensation programsInvestment income - selling off investments, dividends, etc. Passive income/side hustles - rental property income, a new hustle you start, selling off a rental propertyHSAsMore advanced techniques to get to your retirement funds early - e.g. Roth IRA 5-year ladder conversionsPart-time or full-time work - You can always go back to work!  This might be your backup plan, your parachute cord, or perhaps a new passion you discover and are excited to do.  Generally speaking, though, you need to make sure that you'll have enough cash every year to cover your living expenses until you're 59.6 and your retirement funds kick-in.How you plan your withdrawal strategy for early retirement:It depends is the real answer.  It's going to be different for everyone based on the reality of their portfolio and their goals. We share high-level how Maggie and Greg are funding their early retirement.  What should you do?  Have a plan, understand the levers, and consult with someone if needed.To early retire, meaning before 59.5 in our definition, you'll need to have income + safe withdrawals of taxable accounts. So if you need $100K a year, you need to find a way to generate that cash. Having passive or some active income makes things infinitely easier and less risk. You'll need to plot it out though: If I have $1M of taxable assets and that grows at 5% a year, if I withdrawn $110K a year for 10 years, you'd basically eat up most of that and then could start using your retirement accounts.How specifically do I start withdrawing money?  We discuss short and long-term capital gains and other factors you'd want to consider. We also briefly discuss how these withdrawal strategies change for 60+.Top 3 Takeaways:There are a bunch of different ways to fund and structure early retirement.Make a general plan for how you plan to do yours.Understand the principles Know that you'll need to adjust and pivot your plan over time.References:Friends on FIRE podcast #004 - Spending Less – Pillar #1Friends on FIRE podcast #005 - Growing Wealth – Pillar #2Friends on FIRE podcast #006 - Finding Freedom – Pillar #3Mike's Book: Your New Relationship with MoneyFriends on FIRE podcast #112 - How to know if you are FIFriends on FIRE podcast #096 - Freedom is the ultimate financial goal, not retirementFriends on FIRE podcast #059 - The amazing tax benefits of FSAs, HSAs, and DCAsFriends on FIRE podcast #138 - How a family of 5 can afford to retire at 41 and 43 (part 2 of 5)https://cfiresim.com/Social Security Administration website---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We've all been there before: a shiny new toy breaks after a month and the store won't take it back. Or your credit card is charged the wrong amount, and the company won't or can't fix it. In most cases, these problems can be easily resolved with a few basic tactics. And in almost every case, you have at your disposal additional tools to make things right. Overarching advice:Purchase from reputable companies. (e.g. Amazon, REI, Patagonia)Save your paperwork.Do your research and assume there's a resolution.Be respectful but clear.Save your communications with vendors.Build your case and be prepared to provide the evidence.What can you do?Initiate a return. Many online retailers have efficient return processes. Most even come with a return label with your product! The easiest thing to do is just package it up and send it back.Request service under the manufacturer's warranty. Almost everything comes with some sort of warranty. Save the details of this coverage, and chances are that your issue can be fixed ASAP.Call customer service or visit the store. Be nice. Dealing with customers is a HARD job. Show them some respect, and they'll likely show it to you in return. If all you want is a credit of some sort, the same applies to discussing a broken product.Take to social media. Because of the public nature of social media, many companies staff their online service teams differently. Depending on the brand's strategy, you could either get enhanced support, such as real-time response and dedicated manager-level care agents who are empowered to resolve issues. You might also get a bot, which is not helpful. A company's strategy here can tell you a lot about how much they value you as a customer.Dispute the charge on your credit card. In many cases, you can do this online without interacting with an agent. Click on the charge, click through the dispute flow, and provide a little information. Make the credit card company do the work here!File an insurance claim with your credit card provider. Not all credit cards offer this, but higher-end ones will usually partner with a 3rd party to provide extended warranty and insurance coverage.File a complaint with the Better Business Bureau. If none of the above tactics work, file a complaint with the BBB. It's a super easy process and is done completely online.Top 3 takeaways:Companies usually try to do the right thing, but when they don't, get what you deserve!Behind the companies are still people, and you should always treat them with respect.Leverage all the tools at your disposal to make things right, including social media, credit cards, and customer service.Show References:Amazon ice packs Maggie is so excited aboutMaggie's favorite Patagonia underwearBetter Business Bureau - File a complaintFriends on FIRE podcast #043 - Know and use your credit card benefits---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Maggie's top 10 product's she loves:Bose noise-canceling headphonesAirpod prosApple laptop and iphone and how they seamlessly work together.1password password management toolMy cast iron pan (always pan vs. lodge cast iron pan)Instant pot and air fryer (they are a power couple, so they go on the list as one item)Library cardWeighted blanketScannerTeslaMike's top 10 product's he loves:Mike doesn't officially have a list, but if he did, it would include his computer, iphone, some sort of a cloud storage solution, an air fryer, and maybe his library card and some power tools.  Show References:Friends on FIRE podcast #117 - The ultimate paper-free way to control your financial lifeFriends on FIRE episode #035 - 10 F.I.R.E. Extinguishers + How to avoid themFriends on FIRE episode #158 - Control your lifestyle to find financial freedom---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We get the most questions/issues brought up about spouses and partners not being aligned with money. When you're aligned, it's awesome. When you're not, it can be really tough. In episode 109, we talked about why and how to talk to your partner about money, but there's a whole deeper level and approach to really being open and vulnerable with your partner financially. One term for it is financial intimacy, and we like this term. Finance can be a very intimate and vulnerable topic for many people, and it's why many people don't want to talk about it. What is financial intimacy? Financial intimacy refers to the level of trust and comfort that couples have when discussing and managing their finances together. It's a measure of how open and honest partners are with each other about their financial goals, habits, and challenges. Couples with high financial intimacy are able to talk openly and honestly about money, share their financial goals and dreams, and work together to achieve them. They have a shared understanding of their current financial situation, including income, expenses, debt, and savings, and are able to make decisions together that align with their shared values and priorities. On the other hand, a couple with low financial intimacy may have difficulty discussing money, may have different views on spending and saving, and may not have a clear understanding of their shared financial situation. This can lead to conflicts, mistrust, and financial stress. Financial intimacy is important because it can help couples build trust, reduce stress, and work together to achieve their financial goals. Financial intimacy does not come naturally to everyone, it takes time and effort to develop it. Every relationship dynamic is unique, but here are some general tips and ideas to improve your financial intimacy:Have a positive attitude and focus on a shared vision for the future. Remember that talking about money can be stressful, but approach the conversation with a positive attitude and focus on the future, and how you can achieve your financial goals together. Discuss your financial goals and dreams and work together to create a plan to achieve them. What is more romantic than planning for your future together?Set aside regular times to talk about money. Avoid bringing up financial issues when one of you is already stressed or tired, instead, schedule a specific time when both of you are calm and can give the conversation your full attention. This can be weekly, monthly, or whatever schedule works best for you. And consider making this time fun, perhaps it's a financial date night once a month or even a romantic take on money. For example, we light some candles and open up the spreadsheets before we get between the sheets. I only spread my sheets for someone who I can review a good spreadsheet with.Discuss your concerns and priorities. Identify what you see as the main financial problems or challenges you're facing and discuss how you both feel about them.Listen actively and try to understand your partner's perspective. Avoid criticism or blame, and instead, focus on finding solutions together. Listen to your partner's concerns and perspectives and try to understand where they are coming from.Be vulnerable and dig deep to develop open and honest communication. Share your feelings and thoughts about money, and be willing to listen to your partner's thoughts and feelings. This vulnerability is an important part of intimacy. The messiness of a discussion is how we make connections with your partner. Establish trust and accountability. Be honest about your actions, keep each other in the loop, and hold each other accountable for achieving your financial goals.Share responsibilities. Establish clear roles and responsibilities for managing the household finances and stick to them. Be open to compromise. Understand that you may not always agree on everything, but be willing to compromise and find solutions that work for both of you.Seek professional help if needed. If you're struggling to improve your financial intimacy, consider working with a financial planner or therapist to help you navigate the process.Start early. Test the waters while you're dating early in a relationship, and then bail if it's clear it's not possible. Financial intimacy is an evolving process, and it's important to continue to work on it over time. And it's not just about money; it's also about trust, respect, and open communication. By building trust and respect in your relationship, you'll be able to have more open and honest conversations about money, which will ultimately help you to build a more financially intimate relationship. Money can bring you closer together in your relationships. Money issues are never just about money, they are always stemming from something else. If you can't get to that something else, then you're not reaching a level of true intimacy with your partner.   Top 3 takeaways:Financial intimacy is important. Money can bring you closer together in your relationships. It may be a tough or awkward path for you, but it's important.As your relationship grows, strive to mirror that growth in your financial intimacy.Set a financial date with your partner, even if it's not your first financial discussion.  Show References:Friends on FIRE episode #23 - Happiness Sex and MoneyFriends on FIRE episode #34 - Split of combined financesFriends on FIRE episode #90 - Why you don't need a financial plannerFriends on FIRE episode #101 - Friends don't talk about money, but they shouldFriends on FIRE episode #109 - Talking to your partner about moneyMoney on the Table series on YouTubePlaying with FIRE bookPlaying with FIRE Documentary

Episode Summary:In this week's episode, we share how to protect your child's financial identity and create a strong credit store to set them up well for the future. We dig into why this matters and the specific steps and recommendations for what to do. Episode Notes:Let's start with the typical protections: credit freezes and credit monitoring. Monitoring is like having a security camera in your house, while freezes are like having a wall around your house.So why not just freeze a minor's credit? Not that simple. You need a report to start a freeze. And the only way to have a report is to open a line of credit. See the problem? But there's a way to protect your child and build a long credit history.Step 1: Freeze your child's reports at Transunion, Equifax, and Experian. Equifax and Experian now how a specific form for a minor's freeze. For Transunion, you'll need to write a letter.Step 2: Check for any issues: If your child is over the age of 13, it's possible to search for a credit history for anyone over the age of 13 using the AnnualCreditReport.com. If your child is under the age of 13, parents must contact each bureau by mail and provide identity documentation.Step 3: Assuming everything goes well, add your child as an authorized user to every credit card you have, assuming the cards allow it. This sometimes, but not always, triggers the credit bureau to report history on that social.Step 4: Pay your bills! Don't ruin it for your child by messing up your credit score and the kids.Let this above approach ride for 18 years and your child will have protected credit reports and a strong history of credit. This can help them with student loans, new credit cards, opening a bank account, renting, buying or leasing a car, or buying a home. All of these things can also become very difficult if the child was the victim of identity theft.A few additional things you can and should do to protect the identity of your child:Keep their Social Security number safe.Educate them about online activity and monitor it.Don't share personal info unless absolutely necessary.Shred everything.What else can you do to build credit for a child?Co-sign a small loan with them.Open their own credit card if they're old enough.Open a credit builder card.Top 3 takeaways:Identity theft is a big problem for kids and can go unnoticed for years.It's easy to protect their credit report by placing a freeze with the credit bureaus.Adding kids to your lines of credit can help them build strong scores.Show references:Experian Form: Requesting a Minor's Credit Report, Fraud Alert or Security FreezeEquifax Form: Minor Freeze Request FormTransunion Freeze PageFriends on FIRE podcast #043 - Know and use your credit card benefitsFriends on FIRE podcast #044 - Credit Scores + Do they matter?Friends on FIRE podcast #048 - Is Credit Monitoring worth it?Friends on FIRE podcast #134 - Travel hacking our way to 1 million points in 2022Javeline study: Child identify fraud Credit Building Cards---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Why boundaries matter:Boundaries create future freedom and capacity for unexpected things, also known as margin.  You need to get good at saying no to protect your time and your money.Setting boundaries is a form of self-care.Setting boundaries is just setting expectations; you need to set expectations so others will have clear guidelines on how you'd like to be treated. Not having boundaries can lead to resentment, burnout, feeling taken advantage of, feeling taken for granted, hurt, or anger.Not having boundaries can make you feel responsible for others' happiness over your happiness. However, there are times when being “selfish” is quite important.Setting boundaries is taking responsibility for your own life. Or, in the case of money, your finances!Setting boundaries with your time:Boundaries are just setting expectations. You often may need to say NO to things to set those expectations. Setting boundaries is about taking yourself and your time seriously enough to give it a voice in your life and advocate for yourself. Setting boundaries is having integrity. If I say yes to something, I want to show up with my best self, and I can't do that on everything. We often make commitments based on some hopefully future version of ourselves that may not exist. Consider the future when deciding what to commit to, and be realistic. Remember what it feels like to be overcommitted and think about that feeling when deciding something.Flip the script and reframe things. Don't feel guilty about setting boundaries and taking the freedoms you need to be happy and balanced in life; feel guilty for not doing this.  Remember, every time you say yes to someone else you are re saying no to your kids or your other priorities.Know your why.Set time limits or constraints. It's either a hell yes or a no way. Limit the in-betweens. Though if/when it's appropriate, you could present some alternatives; e.g., I can't do that, but here's what I can do instead.You can say no after you've already said yes. Leverage an accountability partner or friend. Run things by them in advance. I often use my husband Greg for this. Remember that you must put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you can help other people. Your oxygen mask is boundaries.Keep a “no log.” Setting boundaries with your money:Saying no to yourself and saying no to your kids.Mindset around what creates true happiness - it's not stuff.Avoid FOMO.Avoid lifestyle inflation.Avoid trying to impress other people, aka keeping up with the Joneses.A few final thoughts and warnings on boundaries:Don't let boundaries be an excuse for being lazy or cheap.We need to balance freedom/self-care with the impact we have in life.We need to re-frame and re-shape our self-image to have the confidence to set boundaries, reframe our inner dialogue to remove guilt and judgment from the idea of setting boundaries and invest in your growth in this area to create freedom and let ourselves and others see the value we create.Top 3 takeaways:Setting boundaries is a good thing; think of it as setting expectations. You need to get good at saying no to protect your time and your money.This is a journey, and be kind to yourself as you get better as this; your confidence will grow over time.Show References:Friends on FIRE episode #035 - 10 F.I.R.E. Extinguishers + How to avoid themFriends on FIRE episode #158 - Control your lifestyle to find financial freedomFriends on FIRE episode #045 - Essentialism + Money---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We asked you for money etiquette discussion and situations, and you all delivered! We discuss the following etiquette questions and situations you all shared with us on Instagram:Someone asks you to pay for something and says they'll pay you back, but it's been weeks or months.Feeling pressure to donate money at work for numerous wedding/baby gifts.A shared AirBNB, and I can afford or prefer a nicer place and am willing to pay more.Extended family vacations. Some families can't afford the trip. How can we best handle this? Same for friends' trips with multiple families.  Is it OK for some to contribute more/less to the trip?Ugh, the never-ending dance of itemizing the restaurant bill or splitting it evenly??Splitting the bill at big group dinners when you didn't order as much as everyone else.Gift Giving!  How to navigate wanting to give simpler gifts when another person gives expensive gifts?How much to spend on wedding gifts, especially when invited without a plus 1.Paying for your own plate at a awedding / wedding money gifts?What do you buy for someone that has so much more than you do?How to tip guys at a hotel or airport taxi stand who hail a taxi for you.When holiday gifts are “in budget” but don't look like enough quantitatively?How to handle a friend that always asks about your finances but never shares theirs?Is it polite to talk about maxing out accounts if you don't know for sure if the other person is able to? Or is knowledge power?Family asking to borrow money and will pay it back on payday (in a few days) then you have to chase for it.Top 3 takeaways:Money can be an awkward topic for everyone. We all face situations where we need to improve our muscle of being open and honest about money with our friends and family.You do you!Be kind and honest.Show References:Emily Post podcastFriends on FIRE episode #168 - How to ask for a raiseFriends on FIRE episode #109 - Talking to your partner about moneyFriends TV clip  “The One with Five Steaks and Eqqplant splitting Money.”Friends TV clip “Ross's birthday is a little pricey.”---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Episode Summary:In this week's episode, we do a full-year expense review and share what each of our families spent this past year. We share our total spending for the year and break down our top spending categories, which areas we're feeling good about, and where we'd like to improve in 2023. We also share additional reflections and financial goals as we kick off 2022.  Episode Notes:We always find it interesting to learn what other families spend in a year, so we're sharing what it costs our families of 4 and 5 to live for a whole year. First, we remind everyone why and how we track our expenses and some details on what's included, and then we dig into the details. Top 3 takeaways:It's an important investment in your finances and relationships to track and review expenses with your spouse.  There's no perfect way to do this.  You can be as detailed or as high-level as you want to be.  It's called personal finance for a reason.  It can be fun and helpful to review and discuss this with another family.  Show references:Friends on FIRE episode #109 | Talking to your partner about moneyFriends on FIRE episode #27 - Why Tracking Net Worth MattersFriends on FIRE episode #15 - Expense Tracking Gone WildNet worth tracking spreadsheetExpense tracking spreadsheet---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

This is now our fourth year of podcasting!Mike and Maggie discuss several topics:What we've been up to on the holiday break.What we're most excited about in 2023.Our 2023 intentions and goals.How do we make these intentions stick?Top 3 takeaways:Take some time to reflect on last year.Take some time to set some intentions for this year.Finally, put some practices in place to create good habits around your intentions.  References:2023 Financial Checklist (scroll to bottom of page)---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

This is our 181st podcast episode, and we're very proud of consistently producing an ad-free podcast for the last three years; we haven't missed a week! We each share our top reflections on the year and what we think of each other's reflections. Our reflections are a mix of personal and financial topics. Mike reads Maggie a poem, and there might be more tears. We hope you enjoy the episode, thank you for another fantastic year, and we can't wait to continue this journey with you in 2023.  Show References:C FIRE simulation toolIF poem by Rudyard KiplingArticle: The idea of finding a career with 'purpose' is a lie and you should focus on finding tasks that you love, according to this influential researcher---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

No notes this week! We hope you enjoy the episode.Show References:Michael Burry, Elon Musk, and Mark Zuckerberg are raising the alarm on the US economy. Here are 8 recession warnings from top commentators this week---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Peer pressure is all around us. There is pressure from marketers, kids, friends, complete strangers, and all around us! What is peer pressure?Peer pressure, by definition, is “a feeling that one must do the same things as other people of one's age and social group to be liked or respected by them.”There is also active and passive peer pressure.  Active is someone saying, “oh you gotta get a Tesla so you can be my bessie with a Tessie.” Passive is me seeing you have a Tesla and then really wanting one. I believe there is positive and negative peer pressure, otherwise known as good and bad influences. Keeping up with the Joneses is peer pressure at its finest. You're doing it for them, not for you.The good kind of peer pressure:We all want to feel accepted and valued by others. It takes courage and confidence to buck the trend. And some peer pressure can be good! Let's talk about that for a moment.The positive effects of peer pressure can include a sense of belonging and support, increased self-confidence, and learning new hobbies and interests. FI and FIRE are great examples of the positive effects of peer pressure.The whole reason and spirit of why we started this podcast were to get more friends to talk about money. Talking to your friends about money is a form of good peer pressure if you do it appropriately.   If the peer pressure is motivating and encouraging, that's the sweet spot! But, if it starts making you feel bad about yourself, that's when you want to reassess things.  More examples of the good kind of peer pressure: Felipe/Shannon sharing their expense tracking and budgets, Mike doing the same, a friend who wants to do a no-drinking month challenge with you, What strategies can help handle negative peer pressure? And how to find more of the good kind of peer pressure and get it into your life:Pay attention to how you feel. Recognizing peer pressure and being able to name it is half the battle.  Plan and communicate. Pack special snacks if you know you're going to feel pressure to buy your kids snacks at the movie theatre with another family letting their kids buy whatever they want.Have a candid conversation with the person pressuring you. For example, tell them something isn't in your budget or how it makes you feel when they talk about a particular topic. Make up an excuse if you have to. For example, you may find with some people; you can't have a direct and candid discussion. You can't change everyone; you can only control yourself.Set boundaries and say no when you need to. Back up a no with a positive statement. You may need to be repetitive to ensure your boundaries and no one comes across clearly.  How to find more of the good kind of peer pressure and get it into your life:Surround yourself with more of the people you truly want to emulate. “You are the sum of the people you surround yourself with.” Sum is the perfect word here cause it can add up quickly if you surround yourself with people focused on materialism and acquiring more and more.If you don't already have that community, go out and find it! It's online with things like Instagram, Facebook, and youtube. It's in person with local meetup groups and events like CampFI and EconoME.Invest in fostering friendships with similar values and beliefs. You have to put time and energy into friendships to foster them.Avoid people and situations that trigger peer pressure and don't feel right to you. Leave a situation if it feels uncomfortable. Encouragement to stick to your values in the face of peer pressure: It's hard enough for adults to do this; imagine if you're a developing teenager. With teenagers and kids specifically, give them opportunities to earn money through an allowance and extra chores. Then, let them manage that money and the decisions themselves with guidance from you. They need boundaries set for them; it's how they learn.Flip the script. Change your mindset and how you're contextualizing and adding perspective to these situations and decisions. It's all about balance and tradeoffs.  Top 3 takeaways:There's good and bad peer pressure.Find more of the good.  This is hard work. Don't beat yourself up too much if you succumb to peer pressure. But continue to work hard to overcome it.Show References:Friends on FIRE podcast #144 | Inflation is out of control! What is happening?Friends on FIRE podcast #158 | Control your lifestyle to find financial freedomFriends on FIRE podcast #035 | 10 F.I.R.E. Extinguishers + How to avoid them---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In October, the IRS announced that the contribution limits for several savings programs were increasing in 2023. This might not have made it onto your radar, but it's a big deal and something you should be aware of. Federally regulating savings plans help you legally reduce your tax bill, and over time this can be a considerable amount of money.Want to be a savings all-star in 2023? Start by maxing out the plans available to you. But let's start with a quick refresher on tax-free and tax-deferred plans.A tax-free program is one where you don't pay income taxes when you withdraw. There's a distinction though between forever tax-free like a Health Savings Account and a future tax–free Roth account where you've already paid income taxes on the contributions. We'll get into that later.A tax-deferred program means you contribute pre-tax to an account and thus reduce your taxable income. As an example, contribute $10,000, and you might save $2,500 in taxes. But when you withdraw it in retirement, you pay income taxes (hopefully lower taxes since you're retired and have a lower income then).  2023 limits:401(k), 403(b), most 457 plans, and the federal government's Thrift Savings Plan is increased to $22,500, up from $20,500. Over 50: The catch-up contribution limit for employees aged 50 and over who participate in 401(k), 403(b), most 457 plans, and the federal government's Thrift Savings Plan is increased to $7,500, up from $6,500. IRAs and Roth IRAs increased to $6,500, up from $6,000. The IRA catch-up contribution limit for individuals aged 50 and over is not subject to an annual cost of living adjustment and remains $1,000. Remember Note that you can do both an IRA and a Roth, but the combined contributions can't exceed the limit.Health Savings Accounts is $3,850 for self-only coverage, $7,750 for family coverage. Individuals 55 and over may contribute an extra $1,000 to their HSA.What does this all mean, and what do you do?The main principle to understand is that you want to save on taxes when your tax rate will be highest and pay it when it is lowest. So if you are in your peak earnings, save taxes now. If you are just into the workforce, pay it now.What should you do?If you want to really crush your savings goals in 2023, start by maxing out your employee plan, likely a 401k. $22,500 per person. You might need to do a little math to determine what % of your salary will contribute that amount.If you are eligible for a Roth IRA, max that out, but note that your income might disqualify you. $6,500 per person.If you can't do a Roth, do a traditional IRA, but also note that you may not be able to deduct it. If you have an employee plan, your income may prohibit you from deducting the contribution. Also $6,500 per person.If you have a high deductible health insurance plan, which we recommend, max out your HSA.$3,850 per person.That's a lot of money and might seem out of reach, but the sooner you can max these out, the easier it will become to maintain it. Your lifestyle inflation will become based on these and you won't need to make harder choices later.Top 3 takeaways:Understanding pre-tax and post-tax savings plans is an important part of achieving your financial goals.Always strive to max out what the IRS allows.If you have aggressive financial goals in life, you'll need aggressive savings habits, and it can start with these programs.Show References:IRS websiteFriends on FIRE podcast #114 - What's a rothIRA and do I need one?Friends on FIRE podcast #059 - The amazing tax benefits of FSAs, HSAs, and DCAsFriends on FIRE podcast #142 - What's your 401k invested in?Friends on FIRE podcast #016 - 401ks are your BFF!---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Episode Summary:In this week's episode, we interview Jessica from The Fioneers and talk about designing a life you don't want to retire from. Jess spends a lot of time talking, thinking, and writing about how people can use the financial freedom they are building along the way to Financial Independence (FI) to design a life they don't want to retire from. We also talk with Jess about changes she's seen in the FIRE movement over the years, the power of community, how to leverage experimentation to build confidence, and her exciting custom campervan buildout.  Episode Notes:Jess from the Fioneers is a full-time human being and a part-time writer and lifestyle design coach. She is a Co-Founder of The Fioneers, an AWARD-WINNING financial independence blog focused on the intersection between financial independence and lifestyle design. She also provides coaching, courses, and retreats on career discovery and lifestyle design for people who want to take unconventional paths and design lives they love. In her free time, you can find her spending as much time as possible outside, perfecting her sourdough pizza recipe, and road-tripping in her campervan. In this discussion with Jess from the Fioneers, we cover many topics, including:What the Fioneers have been up to since we last had them on in Episode 42Jess quit her job 2+ years ago and is enjoying entrepreneurshipCorey just quit his job and is spending six months on a sabbatical focused on burnout recoveryTheir camper van experiment and the resulting decision to spend $150K+ on a custom built-out camper vanTheir goal to be location independent Definition of SlowFI and CoastFIThe difference between financial independence and financial freedomThe shifts Jen has seen in the FIRE movement in the last few yearsThe lifestyle design framework that Jess uses with her clients and that her and Corey have used themselves. What, why, and how.How they are approaching medical insurance as entrepreneurs The power of community when trying to build an extraordinary and unconventional lifeHow to leverage experimentation to build your confidence and take bigger stepsShow References:Friends on FIRE podcast #042 - The Fioneers InterviewThe Fioneer's websiteThe Fioneer's on Twitter and InstagramThe Fioneer's SlowFI Facebook GroupOutdoorsy app---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

What is the arrival fallacy?The arrival fallacy is the false assumption that once you reach a goal, you will experience lasting happiness. Many people become less happy after attaining something they have been striving towards. They were happier during the journey and less at the destination.Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, a Harvard-trained expert on positive psychology, created the term itself. Dr. Ben-Shahar says, “the arrival fallacy is the illusion of reaching a destination or goal and realizing that the achievement doesn't make you as happy as you thought it would.” He then adds, “while most people can predict what might may them happy, they usually misjudge the preconceived intensity and overall duration of said happiness.”It makes sense that when you're on a journey to some big audacious goal, from a big project launch to becoming a doctor to having a child to early retirement, you believe at the end of it, you'll reach an enduring level of happiness. Once people arrive at a goal and realize the happiness doesn't last, they set another bigger, better goal, constantly seeking something they believe will arrive at lasting happiness. And it doesn't. That's the fallacy.People experiencing the arrival fallacy might also mask their unhappiness that increases after their goal is achieved. This concept is often called “escalation of commitment” and is a human behavior pattern where someone facing negative consequences from a decision, action, or situation continues the behavior instead of altering their course. They are escalating their commitment to some path, even as they learn it might not be the path for them.  People mistakenly confuse happiness with reaching an achievement. Happiness is a lifelong journey. It's not one achievement. It's not one place you arrive at and then stay at. The insight here is that happiness is a journey, not a destination.  Is the arrival fallacy affecting your happiness?  Maybe. Probably. If you've reached a goal and you're not feeling continued happiness from it, then you're likely experiencing the arrival fallacy.You may feel incredibly happy after achieving a big goal, and that's awesome and hopefully the case. We don't mean to imply that working hard towards a goal can't create happiness. The arrival fallacy and what we want to help you avoid is the idea that achieving that big goal will create enduring happiness. It will create a short-term dopamine hit of happiness, and you need to design a life where you get those dopamine hits on an ongoing basis. Happiness is a lifelong journey, and we feel happiness through our relationships, community, and daily life efforts.Most of the ways you can fight the arrival fallacy involve changing your mindset. Of course, mindset is the solution to so many things in life, so we're not surprised by this!What can you do to combat the arrival fallacy and improve your happiness?Identify the core issue you believe is making you less happy or unfilled, and make sure the goal indeed corrects that.Do your research. Know what you're getting into. Talk to other people.Adjust your expectations. Based on the research you've done, adjust your expectations. Go in “eyes wide open,” and stop telling yourself you'll be so happy when xyz happens. It's not an arrival fallacy if you know what you're getting into and you're not expecting immediate and lasting happiness from a career path. On the contrary, setting your expectations too high creates more unhappiness and can lead to depression and other types of malaise. Set smaller, more practical goals. Enjoy the efforts and journey you're taking on the path of something versus expecting the final arrival on the path to be what creates happiness.Appreciate that happiness is your life journey, not the destination. Envision your future. Ask yourself what you'll do after you reach a goal that will continue to make you happy?Create new goals. Setting goals and then starting the journey to achieve them can make you happy. But let's bring that back full circle, as you need to understand the arrival fallacy so you can set your expectations on how you'll feel as you accomplish these new goals.  Things take time. Be patient.Handle hard better. This is a super short and inspiring talk from Duke's women's basketball coach Kara Lawson. She says life will “never get easier; what happens is you handle hard better. What happens if you become someone who handles hard stuff better, not someone waiting for the easy.” Understanding the arrival fallacy helps you to handle hard better.  Top 3 takeaways:Happiness is a journey, not a destination. Invest in that journey and design your life to optimize what truly makes you happy.Money, or early retirement, won't magically make you happy, but it can give you the freedom to design a life filled with more of the things that do make you happy.Show References:Article: Arrival Fallacy: How to be happierDuke Basketball Coach Kara Lawson Video: Handle Hard BetterBook: Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful LifeBook: The Pathless Path: Imagining a new story for work and lifeFriends on FIRE Episode #140 - Maggie's early retirement “bucket list” plans (part 4 of 5)Friends on FIRE Episode #158 - Control your lifestyle to find financial freedomFriends on FIRE Episode #144 - Inflation is out of control! What is happening?---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Hygge is the danish concept of coziness but with specific elements. How to build hygge:WarmthWrapping yourself in a blanket. Sitting by a fire. Cuddling on the couch.What it's not: sitting on a hot beach. Hygge is warmth when it's cold outside.LightSoft light and contrasting light with shadows. Candles, Christmas trees, soft lamps.What it's not: lots of light, white light, bright lightSmellRich smells of winter or sweets or baking.What it's not: It can really be anything you feel adds to the mood.TasteCoffee, hot chocolate, pastriesWhat it's not: Probably not a bowl of candy, but if that does it for you, go for it!Marketers know all this stuff and will tweak advertising to create hygge settings. Just watch some ads now and see. But don't get confused: hygge is not a new TV in your living room, even if the commercial has warmth, light, food, and family. To achieve hygge, focus on the easy essentials that don't cost a lot!Top 3 takeaways:Hygge is an amazing atmosphere for the holidays, and we recommend trying it out.Marketers will try to leverage your subconscious desire for hygge to encourage you to buy stuff you don't need.Hygge essentials are probably already in your house, but if they're not, they can be found inexpensively. Show References:Little Book of Hygge---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We introduce Alexa Kwartin, a family law attorney in Atlanta, GA, who gives her perspective and advice on prenuptial agreements, aka prenups.  We then dig into a detailed discussion on prenups with Alexa.What is a prenup?A prenuptial agreement, aka prenup for short, is a legal document that two people create before marriage. It typically lists all assets and debts each person has entering into the marriage and specifies what should happen to those items if the marriage were to end. You can also have a similar document, called a postnuptial or postmarital agreement, that is entered into during the marriage.A prenup can help you pass separate property to children from prior marriages, clarify financial rights and responsibilities during your marriage, avoid arguments in the case of a divorce because it would specifically lay out things like alimony, and protect spouses from each other's debts.We're perhaps stating the obvious here, but both parties must agree to a prenup; you can't have one person write up a prenup on their own.  Each state has its own laws regarding what can and can't be included in a prenup, which is one of many reasons why we recommend consulting with an attorney on this process. Why prenups are a good thing, and why you shouldn't be afraid of them:It's not just for the wealthy and super-rich. Couples of more modest means, or even deep in debt, are increasingly seeing the value of prenups.Prenups have a bad rap, and we don't think it's fair.If you don't have a prenup, your state's laws will dictate what happens to your property in the case of a divorce or death. Each state's laws vary, but they will dictate what happens to property acquired during your marriage and sometimes even property you own coming into the marriage. Marrying someone is a contract between the couple, and with that contract comes specific rights regarding what happens to your marital assets. Your spouse could take on $50K in debt without telling you, and then you get divorced, and half that debt is your accountability in many states.Creating a prenup allows you to decide on these things when you're in love and in a kind and compassionate mindset. That seems fair for everyone involved. So many things can go wrong in a marriage, things you could never predict or imagine; prepare yourselves. Hope for the best, but plan for the unexpected and worst. It's the best wedding gift you can give your love! It's like free premarital counseling - you have to have financial discussions.  Is money your concern? A prenup can save you money in the end. Best case, you have a happy marriage and never need or use the prenup. Yeah, we hope that's how it works out for most people. And you're willing to pay crazy amounts for rings and weddings, and none of that protects you. Worst case, you get divorced, and it's a smoother and less expensive divorce because you already agreed to these things in advance.You need to make sure your prenup is done properly and on the “up and up,” or it could be judged as unfair during divorce proceedings. For example, both parties need to be represented by a lawyer, or there's a high likelihood a judge would question its validity. Prenup advice and tips from a family law lawyer:Who needs a prenup?Should you adjust a prenup over time if big things financially change in your marriage?Can you DIY a prenup, or do you need to hire a lawyer?Are prenups enforceable by a judge in the case of a divorce?What can a prenup do, and what can it not do?Are there any unique considerations for same-sex couples?What is a postnup, and when might that be needed vs. a prenup?Top 3 takeaways:Everyone should at least thoughtfully consider if a prenup is right for them.  Don't let prenup myths and misconceptions be the reason you don't get one.  Consult with an attorney if you're considering getting a prenup; it's worth the investment in marriage and your financial future.Show References:Alexa's website: Kwartin & LevineKwartin & Levine on facebook---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

No notes this week! We hope you enjoy the episode.Show References:Washington Post Article: 7 ways a recession could be good for your financially---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Kids' sports have become notoriously expensive, competitive, and time-consuming. What is driving this? We first hear from our listeners. And we got so many more responses than we'll read here.Let's first talk about what makes sports great:Health and FitnessTeamworkPracticing and growing a skillPotentially finding and developing expertiseLearning to win and lose gracefullyBut not everyone is having this wholesome experience. Many families can't afford to participate, and those who can sometimes find themselves in such a competitive environment that it becomes stressful.What to remember about the cost of kids' sports:This is an industry that leverages your desire to support your child.It can create a narrative that to be successful your child must participate in a certain way. And that way has high costs.Equipment can be expensive; like everything, the quality only matters to a certain degree.Traveling can exponentially increase your participation costs and take up a tremendous amount of time.What can you do about it?Remember that this isn't just money; it's time for you and your child. So there is an opportunity cost. Make sure you have enough time to fulfill other needs in your life.Let your kid try things out. Push them to explore, but don't push them too hard if they don't enjoy it.If possible, lean towards less expensive and accessible sports with many kids. High demand usually creates more competition, which lowers costs.Consider forgetting the idea that your kid is getting a college scholarship. They are limited even at the highest level. Remember that you're the parent, and ultimately you decide. So help your kids make informed decisions. Create trade-offs for them with time and money.Top 3 takeaways:Sports are an amazing way for kids to stay healthy and develop important life skills.Pay-for-play sports are an industry like any other, so scrutinize what you're being sold.Whether or not your kid is good at sports doesn't make you a better or worse parent.Show References:Washington Post ArticleCBS Article---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We know these events are founded in meaningful and religious traditions, but let's be honest, many of those traditions have turned into big expensive parties. We share how much we spent on our weddings. We discuss the historical etiquette of who pays for weddings and some stats and insights.  Things to consider as you're deciding how much to spend and how to approach these big expenses in your life and your child's life:Nobody cares. Just kidding, these are important events and worth making memorable, but make it memorable for you. Then, the people who truly love you will find it memorable because of that alone.There are no rules for these items. Even if there were rules, rules are meant to be broken, especially archaic and inflated rules. It's personal finance, and everyone will make unique decisions about this stuff.Plan your wedding as though no one else will be there. What do you want it to be?Don't succumb to peer pressure, keeping up with the Jones, or lifestyle inflation.Explore the root of a tradition and stay true to that; not everything it's become as the world has become fancier and more modern.Realize there are alternative ways to do these things, and you can buck the trend if you want to.  Really consider if you're willing to go into debt for these things. Then, ideally, manage within your budget.  It's going to require discussions about money with your spouse and family. There may be some tough and awkward discussions. If you can't manage these discussions, then you may not be ready to get married.  Be transparent with your kids when and where appropriate. You can explain this stuff to a 13-year-old, 16-year-old, and especially a 25 or 30-year-old. Don't be afraid to disappoint your kids, instead reframe it as a teachable moment. Consider proposing tradeoffs and options to your kids. And finally, remember that not getting everything you went and deciding on tradeoffs teaches kids important lessons. It builds humility, financial acumen, work ethic, and the ability to delay gratification.  Top 3 takeaways:Everyone's approach can and should be different based on their situation and values.  Be intentional!Don't succumb to peer pressure.  Talk to your kids about this stuff.  It's okay for them to understand some of these things earlier in life, so they aren't surprised.  Show References:Emily Post Institute---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We start off by sharing an update on our 1 million point goal in 2022. We have both beat our goal and have earned 1.3M+ points across 9 cards and our two families. We provide a refresher on travel hacking and how to do it and then dig into how to start maximizing the use of your points.  Travel hacking redemption general reminders:The value comes from bonuses, not from normal spending. So if you want to play the game, you need to churn.You apply for a card, meet the minimum requirements (for example, spend $3,000 in the first 3 months), and then the points are deposited into your account.Hotel points are generally worth about $0.005 apiece. Airline miles are around $0.02 apiece. So on normal credit card spending, that's .5% and 2% back.When you're looking for ways to use your points and miles, always do the math. If a hotel room costs $50 or 50,000 points, pay with cash! Because those 50,000 points can likely be used to get $250 or more in value later.Think of your miles and points as cash, and do your due diligence.Using the valuation of $0.02 per mile, 1,000,000 airline miles are worth about $20K, more or less, depending on what you use them for.What's your earning strategy?Pick 1-3 hotels and 1-3 airlines and focus your earnings on those.It's better to have 200K miles with three airlines and 100K with six because you need to be able to cover the whole cost with miles or pay an unreasonable cost to buy miles.For airlines, get coverage across the major alliances: Skyteam, Oneworld, Star Alliance. We'll get into why later. For hotels: Choice, Marriott, Hilton, IHGEARN! EARN! EARN! Don't mess around. Don't dabble. If you're serious about free travel, you need a lot of points to give you the most options.Don't keep the cards past a year. The perks might be nice, but if you want to be eligible for the card again in the future, you'll need to cancel it. 100K miles in 2 years is better than Group 1 boarding.How do you redeem these?Understand the value. Hotels are roughly a half a cent a piece, airlines roughly 2 cents a piece. Don't give up your points for a bad redemption.Hotels are easy so let's start there. Pricing is dynamic, so regularly check for changes in price and rebook. Use credit cards for free nights or like IHG's card, 4th night free.On to airlines. Search every program you have points with and see what's available.Be flexible. Points and miles are dynamic. More popular times of the day or of the year are more expensive. So check the calendars to see if leaving on a different day or time is a better deal.Check Alliance partners. As you build up your portfolio or get transfer points like AMEX or Chase, you can tackle level 2 of searching, which is with International carriers.Booking Internationally can be overwhelming, so the key is the volume of searches.What if you don't know where you want to go?! Follow travel blogs for flash sales and promotions. Consider paying for flight deal notification services. Once you get some options, you have to go through the searches. There's no easy way around this. Once you find a deal, book it and enjoy the trip.Top 3 takeaways:Know the value of your points and treat them mostly like cash.Dedicate some time to thorough searching. It's the only way to find the best deal.This approach to earning points and then using them takes extra time, so realize this is a tradeoff in your time versus your money.  And it can be a fun tradeoff!Show References:Mike's American Express Platinum Referral LinkMaggie's American Express Platinum Referral LinkMike's Chase British Airways Referal LinkMaggie's Chase IHG Referral LinkFriends on FIRE Episode #134 - Travel hacking our way to 1 million points in 2022Friends on FIRE Episode #152 | Travel hacking thru the summer and 1M point goal updateAward Wallet - Free Loyalty Points Tracker (they also have a paid version)The Points Guy websiteThe Points Guy Free Travel Tracking AppThe Points Guy Beginning Guide to Points and Miles---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In this discussion with Liz from LizGetsLoaded, we cover many topics, including:How she grew up financiallyWhy she started LizGetsLoaded and what she's gained from itHer early retirement plansCharitable giving and effective altruismHSAs and how she manages and tracks hers like a retirement accountAnxiety and moneyFinancial independence as the ultimate emergency spending accountShow References:LizGetsLoaded PodcastLizGetsLoaded BlogLizGetsLoaded on InstagramBook: The Most Good You Can Do: How Effective Altruism Is Changing Ideas About Living EthicallyBook: Work Optional: Retire Early the Non-Penny-Pinching WayThe life you can save ---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We learn Mike's never asked for a raise, but he is a finance business partner who is often the one approving raises. And Maggie has successfully asked for at least one raise and was in a leadership position where she was often asked for raises and the person deciding if it was going to happen or not. We share our best tactical advice on how to ask for a raise. How to ask for a raise:Do your research. Know your worth in the market, either through other job postings or offers, what you know someone else makes at your company, etc.Know your performance and value at the company. What have your past performance reviews been? Above-average? If so, you might have a strong case. If not? It's likely not going to happen. Don't point to knowing someone else's salary, it's not a core reason to get a raise. It's more likely to put you, the person whose salary you somehow know, your hiring manager, and HR in an awkward spot. There are plenty of reasons why people are paid differently. Focus on what you feel you're worth and the desire to get paid for your worth. The best advice Maggie was ever given is don't demand something right now. After managing people for a decade-plus, she now sees why this advice was given to her. It's tough when you put someone on the spot and demand something right away, the answer is rarely going to be yes unless it's a small company and you're talking to the owner who can agree right on the spot.If you have an actual competing offer from another company, that is one of the easiest easy to get a raise but be ready to go take that other job if they call your bluff. You can either actually resign and wait for them to ask if there's anything they could do to keep you, or you could upfront let them know you're looking and have an offer, but you're primarily only looking due to wanting to get paid more equitably and that you're willing to stay if they can increase your salary. Be respectful, be patient, and think like a people manager. A huge piece of this is how you ask for it, not even what you ask for. The how is critical. Don't be resentful if you don't get what you want. You can either leave or stay and be engaged, but staying and showing your frustration will be picked up on by everyone, and you'll have lost the opportunity for future favors.We wrap up by discussing how to negotiate more money when you're switching companies for a new job.  Top 3 Takeaways:Know your worth and what you care about. Don't ask for something today; ask for a plan to get to where you want to be.Know your talking and your walking points.---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We talk a lot about saving money, as that's a key way to grow your wealth, improve your finances, and reach financial independence. The other way to do these things is to increase your salary through a promotion, asking for a raise, and just being indispensable at your job! This week we're talking about getting a promotion, and next week we'll talk about asking for a raise. We've learned a lot over the years, and here's our biggest career advice to all of our listeners:How to get promoted:First, let's start with what it's not about. It's not about being the best software engineer, analyst, or project manager. And it's not about how long you've been doing some job. It's about if you can inspire, influence people, execute, think strategically, execute a vision, simplify a complex message, and manage pressure and stress.  Are you compassionate?  Will people follow you? It's truly the old adage, “what got you here won't get you there.”Understand that it's as much about timing as it is about you. The right role needs to open up at the right time.Leverage your current role to show you have these leadership competencies for the next role. Do your current role differently, pick up new projects or work cross-functionally to show your capabilities for the next level.Find different roles and gain diverse experience. Depending on company culture, you might have to take multiple laterals before even being considered for a promotion.Leadership roles involve tons of decision-making, recommendations, and influence. And to persuade people, you can't just tell them what to do, you need to understand where they are coming from, be able to speak their language (perhaps literally), and simplify complex topics to make others understand them. Give people options, pros and cons, and let them come to the same decision you've come to. Be a strong public speaker. Speak powerfully and prolifically. If you're quiet and shy, you are unlikely to be considered for larger leadership roles. This takes practice and focus, it doesn't come naturally to some of the best speakers out there!Build your relationships and network.  Find leaders who inspire you, and learn from them!Define your personal brand and make every interaction bring it to life!Lastly, remember that it really comes down to one person: the hiring manager. It's their decision, and promoting you will need to help them be more successful.  Remember your job is always in service to someone, no matter what level you are; maintain a service mindset and lack of an ego, and that can make you incredibly successful in your career.  Also, it's okay not to want to get promoted. Not everyone wants more responsibility or accountability. It is okay to want to focus on being the best you can be at your job and leave it at that. Top 3 Takeaways:It takes hard work to be successful.  It takes EQ as much as IQ, and you must lean into the softer skills, often more than the hard skills.  As you succeed in your career, the money will come, and you need to be prepared to handle it responsibly.  Show References:Book: What Got You Here Won't Get You There: How successful people become even more successfulBook: Linchpin: Are You Indispensable?Book: The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We start off by sharing some of our own financial anxieties. Finances can be one of the most stressful and anxiety-ridden topics for many people. Anxiety is normal, and we all have it to some extent or another. We can do many proactive things to cope with and mitigate our financial anxieties. All the financial anxieties we're talking through can be solved or mitigated thru a combination of three things:Education Preparation Community We talk through the financial anxieties that our listeners shared on instagram. They fall into a few main categories:Spending Money + BudgetingHaving enough / RetirementRelationships + FamilyHousingInvesting, stock market volatility, inflation, recessionsHealth insurance + medical costsTop 3 takeaways:Financial anxieties are a real thing! We all have them to some extent or another.You can do things to cope with and manage these anxieties proactively.  Appreciate how far you've come already (just for listening to a financial podcast, seriously), and then continue forward thoughtfully on your financial journey.  Show References:Netflix documentary - Get smart with moneyC FIRE simulation tool#148 | 8 ways to tackle your financial fears#130 | Where meditation and money meet#060 | Budgeting vs. Tracking Expenses#083 | Travel Hacking with Julia from Geobreeze Travel#134 | Travel hacking our way to 1 million points in 2022#006 | Finding Freedom – Pillar #3#095 | How to stop caring what people think and start living#112 | How to know if you are FI#138 | How a family of 5 can afford to retire at 41 and 43 (part 2 of 5)#160 | Debt-free college with Jason Brown#034 | Split or Combined Finances#109 | Talking to your partner about money#056 | Paying off your mortgage is a great investment#133 | How to put a value on your time#123 | The one thing you need to do to plan for a traditional retirement#068 | 5 Simple Steps to Investing#158 | Control your lifestyle to find financial freedom#139 | Medical insurance in early retirement (part 3 of 5)#128 | Creative ways to save on medical expenses#096 | Freedom is the ultimate financial goal, not retirement#042 | The Fioneers Interview#158 | Control your lifestyle to find financial freedom---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Scams are everywhere and have been forever. It's not just Bernie Madoff-scale swindlers out there, though. It is so easy to reach individual investors via social media that scams have flourished. So let's first talk about some guiding principles that you should remember:If it were such a great deal, the person who invented it would keep it a secret and make a trillion dollars.If it were such a unique opportunity, why would they come to you, not someone with much more money.If you don't understand why it's a good investment, then there is a pretty good chance it's not. Trust your gut.Now let's talk about our list and some actual scam types:Multi-level marketing.Purposefully unclear and misleading instructions.Ponzi schemes.“Guaranteed” high yield plans that are well above the market.New Cryptocurrencies.Penny stocks or any stocks about to “explode.”Anyone asking you for your account number or to send money.  Anyone doing something offshore.Someone on Instagram who you think you know/trust and they are all of a sudden asking you for money or personal info.  Some stuff to generally stay away from that aren't scams per se, just potentially bad ideas.Anyone asking you for cash to invest in a new business where the ROI analysis is performed by them.Putting money with people or companies where it's not instantly available. Liquidity and delays allow things to go south without you being able to do anything about it.Crypto.NFTs.Specific tips to avoid scams and further protect your identity and finances:Don't trust anyone.See #1 above.If it's not 100% clear how this person or company is making money, then skip it.Turn on 2-factor authentication on all of your financial accounts.  Many require it.Use strong passwords.  Don't repeat.  Keep them somewhere safe.  We love 1password.  Don't ever give out personal or financial info over the phone to someone who calls you. If they claim to be a company you work with, hang up, and call them back via the phone number on their website.  Freeze your credit.  See episode 48Call your kids or someone you trust and explain the situation.  Get a 2nd, 3rd, and 4th opinion before acting.  When it comes to money, just assume that everyone is working in THEIR best interest, not yours.Top 3 takeaways:If it were such a great deal, the person who invented it would keep it a secret and make a trillion dollars.Scams, fraud, counterfeit, etc. are as old as economies themselves, global and not going away. Be cautious.If you don't understand why it's a good investment, then there is a pretty good chance it's not. Trust your gut.Show References:Investor.govFriends on FIRE episode #048 - Is Credit Monitoring worth it?Price of Avocado Toast podcast 3 part series on MLMsBook: Bag Lady Papers, The priceless experience of losing it allFriends on FIRE episode #116 - Are you ready to invest in Crypto?1Password Liz Gets Loaded venmo tip---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In this discussion with Sarah from Budget Girls, we cover many topics, including:How she grew up financially and what she learned from it.Her first job out of college was making $24K and then she got laid off.She committed to never being terrified about being out of money again.How fear can be very motivating.How she learned to get better with her finances.The many jobs and side hustles she has had over the years.Gamifying her side hustles.Her best thrifting advice.How she got into rental properties and the concept of ethical landlording.Her good and bad experiences with short-term rentals.Talking about finances with her boyfriend.What she would put on a billboard to tell the world.Show References:Budget Girl WebsiteBudget Girl YouTubeBudget Girl FacebookBudget Girl InstagramBudget Girl TikTokBudget Girl The Budget ClubBudget Girl  Etsy ShopBudget Girl Money beginners playlist His and her money.Frugal debt-free life.Holiday Move Bingo on Budget Girl Website.---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We're now 162 episodes into this passion project called Friends on FIRE, and we've covered a lot! But if you're just being introduced to the idea of FIRE or Financial Independence Retire Early, some of our advice might seem a bit overwhelming or confusing. So we're going to simplify the steps you need to get started.Know your why. Any goal needs inspiration. Visualize what you want in life and keep that as your purpose to help you through the hard times.Get your partner on board. If your partner isn't on the journey with you, or worse, moving in an opposite direction, it's much harder to get started toward financial freedom. So get them on the same page and know this could take years!Track your expenses. What a critical piece of the puzzle. How do you know how much you need to retire if you don't know how much you spend? Spoiler: it's impossible.Track your net worth. Knowing what you have allows you to know how much time you can buy back, aka when you can retire or achieve financial independence. Tracking expenses without tracking net worth is like heading on a road trip with a broken fuel gauge.Cut your expenses. Once you know how much you spend, start cutting it. Cut it back to the bone, just until you begin to feel the discomfort. You don't need to live in squalor, but if you have ambitious goals, you need to take dramatic steps. Start to save as much as you can. Some tips: groceries, cell phone, eating out, home services/DIY, etc.Invest your excess. This can get complicated, so we're going to simplify this: just put it all in the market. This comes with risk, and you could lose money, but over time the market has consistently delivered if you diversify. The FIRE community loves VTSAX, an all-stock market ETF. We encourage you to learn about investing and start to make decisions based on your goals and risk appetite, but in the meantime, VTSAX is a reasonable place to start.Calculate your 4%. Financial independence just means that you have enough money to cover your expenses for the rest of your life. An easy way to calculate this, which factors in investment growth over time, is the 4% rule. Take your spending and multiply by 25, and that's your goal number. Then, you can withdraw 4% of that a year and be ok.Set your target. Set an aggressive time target to keep you motivated. Think you can retire and 55? Make it 50, and we bet you'll find yourself ready at 45. But if you don't set a time, you'll probably just keep kicking the can down the road.Take advantage of company benefits and savings programs. Every company is different, but whatever yours offers, consider signing up. 401k, HSA, deferred compensation, stock purchase plans, etc. These can be lucrative and help you on your journey.Do your own taxes. Taxes are a huge component of your financial picture, so why outsource them into a black box? Understanding how your money is taxed will help you make better decisions in the future, so buy TurboTax and do it yourself.Start living some of the changes you want to make in retirement. Lastly, don't wait for some magical time in your life to start doing the things that make you happy. Start them now. You might not be able to do as much or as many, but you'll start living that future life. Perhaps you'll learn it isn't what you thought, or perhaps you'll refine it over time, and your later life will be that much better. Start now, though.Top 3 takeaways:Understand your why. Set a vision for your life and a time you want to reach it.Track your expenses and net worth. What gets measured gets better!Don't wait. Don't wait to start working on your finances. Don't wait to start doing the activities that make you happy.Show References:Book: Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful LifeFriends on FIRE podcast #109 - Talking to your partner about moneyFriends on FIRE podcast #060 - Budgeting vs. Tracking ExpensesFriends on FIRE podcast #027 - Why Tracking Net Worth MattersFriends on FIRE podcast #021 - Cell Phones and TV and Internet, Oh My!Friends on FIRE podcast #147 - How to save on your cell phone billFriends on FIRE podcast #068 - 5 Simple Steps to InvestingFriends on FIRE podcast #090 - Why you don't need a financial plannerFriends on FIRE podcast #123 - The one thing you need to do to plan for a traditional retirementFriends on FIRE podcast #016 - 401ks are your BFF!Friends on FIRE podcast #142 - What's your 401k invested in?Friends on FIRE podcast #014 - Tax Time! Yay!

We kick off this episode by reading some listener comments and questions and addressing some quick thoughts on long-term care insurance. Then, Maggie shares some recent observations on time as she's transitioning into her new early retirement life. What is Parkinson's law?Parkinson's law is the adage that work will expand to fill the time allotted for its completion. Or said another way, the more time you allow for a task, the less effort you will put into it. If we give ourselves an entire week to complete a task, then the task will increase in complexity and fill that entire week. The task itself might be able to be completed in 30 minutes or 2 hours, but we will spend time stressing about it or worrying about how we'll get it done. Then we'll just likely wait until the last minute to get it done anyways. So the extra time we might allow ourselves to do a task isn't necessarily filled with the work needed to do the task or improve the quality of our work. If you're familiar with procrastination, which we think we all are, then you're already familiar with Parkinson's law; you just maybe didn't know the term. Research suggests that when given a task we consider how much time is available to do it versus how much time we need to complete it. So our mindset shifts us to take as much time as we have versus as much time as we truly need. What can we learn from Parkinson's law with our TIME?Recognize that the goal posts are always moving, either by you or by others for you. Getting more done won't make you feel on top of it.Set shorter deadlines. You will worry and stress less and get creative with better ways to do things. Yes, it's a self-imposed deadline but set it and respect it, and it can do wonders to keep you focused. Time-box your work. You could use something like the Pomodoro technique, which is effective for many people. This method breaks down your work time into 25-minute chunks with 5-minute breaks in between. You can use this approach to put time limits on various work and activities and create more focus. Be realistic. Work smarter, not harder. Be judicious and selective about where your time goes.Save the new time you've gained for what matters to you. If something took you 2 hours and you found a way to do it in 1, don't then double your output and return to 2 hours. Keep that time free.Remember YOU control your time, and in theory, you have 100% control over it. Yes, things will come up you can't anticipate. But you choose how to respond. You choose if you watch TV or if you do something else. You choose how effectively you spend at least some of your time at work. Understand this concept. A deadline won't increase productivity, but understanding and accepting the idea of Parkinson's law and adjusting our habits and work practices can. How can we apply Parkinson's law to FIRE?5am Joel, who we've had on the podcast a couple of times, even leverages Parkinson's law to think about the length of our careers. In an excellent article he writes he says, “Careers are supposed to be 40 years long, so we allow them to be 40 years long. If we truly believe that time is 100% within our control, we can choose how long we want our career to be.”  We love this!How can we apply Parkinson's law to money?The same principle applied to money would be: your spending will expand to fill the amount of money you have available. If we have more money, we're more likely to spend it. It's akin to lifestyle inflation or keeping up with the Joneses. It's a lot easier to keep up with Jonese's if you technically have that amount of money available. How can we apply Parkinson's law to improve our finances?First off, when you have less time, you spend more money to outsource work or create efficiencies. So if you get better with time, you 100% will get better with money.When you constrict the amount of money you have, just like time, you will realize you can get by on so much less and still be happy. Hide your money from yourself. Put it into your 401k, your IRA, your brokerage account, or real estate.  Avoid lifestyle inflation. We did a whole recent episode on this, and we talk about it often. Don't move the goal posts for what you think makes you happy. If you are always wanting something more you will never be happy.Set a budget and stick to it. This could be budget categories or an overall spending target for the year. Pretend you have less than you do. It works for us. Practice delayed gratification. Eventually, you can spend money on something, but first, you have to pay yourself, be within your budget, and all of the things we discussed.…Top 3 takeaways:Understanding Parkinson's law will add value to your life. No one is immune to it until you find your ways to overcome it. It applies to your time and money.Consider what you can do to commit to overcoming Parkinson's law with your time and money, and start forming those habits!Show References:Bose Noise-Cancelling HeadphonesMostlyMinimal Life - How noise cancelling headphones make me a better parentBook: Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for MortalsBook: Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of LessAmerican Express Platinum Card Referral LinkFriends on FIRE podcast #158 - Control your lifestyle to find financial freedomRich + Regular Blog: The overemployed working two full-time remote jobs5am Joel Blog: Retire Early with Parkinson's law---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In this episode, we discuss how we've been back for about a week since our European summer adventures ended.  We then dig into:What worked well and what could have been even better (WWW and EBI)Listener questions on how much we budgeted, how much we spent on ice cream, hotels vs. aribnbs, if we experienced anxiety while spending, minimalist packing tips and how it worked out, things we're most grateful to return home to, drones, eating vegan while traveling, food quality in Europe, prices in Europe, drones, and more.The exact amounts we each spent during our family's 32 and 39-day European summer vacations.  We each play “price is right” first to guess each other's total spending.  Top 3 takeaways:We spent a lot of money traveling this summer.  This is a money category that is a priority for both of us.    Tradeoffs and intentional spending are real, even while you're on vacation.  Tracking your expenses on vacation can help you budget and plan for future vacations.  Show References:Friends on FIRE episode #157 - Live from Europe – Summer adventures with friends on FIREFriends on FIRE episode #27 - Why Tracking Net Worth MattersFriends on FIRE episode #15 - Expense Tracking Gone WildNet worth tracking spreadsheetExpense tracking spreadsheet

Jason is from Miami, Florida and now lives in Atlanta with his wife and two sons. He has a bachelor's in communication and a Masters degree in professional writing. He's worked in various public relations, media relations, marketing, writing, and editing roles. He's the author of Margin Matters: How to live on a simple budget and crush debt forever and IT IS POSSIBLE!: How I Earned Two Debt-Free Degrees...and How You Can, Too.In this discussion with Jason Brown, we cover many topics, including:How he was raised financially and what his parents taught him.He learned about money by watching his parents and how they spent money.  They never sat down and had a specific discussion with him; they instead modeled it with their behavior.  He was always taught that if you can't afford it, you don't do it.  Jason was the first person in his family to go to college.The resourcefulness he learned at a young age.Jason shared his college journey, what degrees he earned, and how he funded each.Debt is the easy or lazy way out, and it's just too easy.  There are other ways to attend college without going into debt.One of the biggest lies we're told in society is that you have to take out debt to go to college.Thoughts on student loan forgiveness.  We discuss several tips for getting through college with less debt or debt-free:Dual-enrollment.In-state college.Leverage your high-school guidance counselor for help and support.Scholarships and grants.Visit the scholarship office at your college, even once you're already there! Then, keep applying even after your first year.  Explore if your state has a state-funded scholarship program, such as some states' lottery-funded scholarships.Show References:Jason's Book:  IT IS POSSIBLE!: How I Earned Two Debt-Free Degrees...and How You Can, TooJason's Book: Margin Matters: How to live on a simple budget and crush debt foreverJason's website Margin MattersJason's YouTube ChannelScholarships.comFastweb ScholarshipsCollege Board---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

The average family spends hundreds, and some thousands, per year on toiletries and personal care items.  These are often the items that are part of a trip to Target, the grocery store, or a quick Amazon purchase; you likely don't realize how much you're spending as it adds up quickly.  Many products fit into the categories we're talking about:Personal maintenance items such as shampoo, deodorant, and facial products.  Make-up, nail care, and bath/spa products.   Medicine, vitamins, and supplements.Cleaning supplies for your home.Personal care staples like toilet paper, hand soap, dishwasher soap, etc.  We talk through ideas and tips for how to save money on toiletries and personal care items:Be a personal care minimalist.  Consider what you really need. Focus on being intentional and values-based in your purchase decisions.  Focus on quality over quantity.  Also, consider when quality matters versus does not.  Use up what you already have, even if it's not your favorite product. For example, use up old toothpaste, shampoo, etc., before you restock on things.  Don't allow yourself to stock back up or buy some new product you've wanted until you use up what you already have.  Use less of the product each time you use it.  For example, you don't need as much toothpaste or toilet paper as most people use.  Ensure you use up all of the product before recycling the packaging.  Cut things open if you have to. Consider what stores you're buying things from. Walgreens is expensive for some items but also has a great store brand. Sams Club and Costco can sometimes be a good price.  Do you really need it?  Consider getting to the root cause of why you need some products. For example, something like Kleenex is costly; consider using toilet paper instead.Buy generic and store brand items.  The ingredients are often identical.  Re-fill items with generic items.  If you like a nice or special-looking soap container in your bathroom, consider keeping and reusing that container and refilling it with Aldi's antibacterial hand soap; it's 25% the cost of some other brands. Seek out tried and true classics vs. fancy marketing machines.  For example, CeraVe lotion is highly recommended by all dermatologists, is a quality product, and has a fair, reasonable price. I could instead find many overpriced and overly marketed lotions when CeraVa is arguably a better product.  Minimize your makeup and consider if/when you really need to wear makeup. Make your own!  Mike makes his soap.  Maggie makes her household cleaning products. Don't get pulled into multi-level marketing MLM product schemes.  These products are often much higher priced, and the quality is often not better.     Use coupons and look for things on sale.  The Flipp app helps find sales and deals on specific products.  Take care of yourself naturally, and you need less of all of these products. For example, if you're exercising, eating healthy, getting enough sleep, meditating, and so many other things, you'll need less medicine and “personal care” items.Top 3 takeaways:Be more thoughtful about your decisions for your wallet and the environment.  You probably only need a quarter of what you usually buy out of habit.Test and learn. Stop using some things for a short time, use less, or switch products. You might learn a lot.Show References:Johnny Harris Shampoo Videofriends on FIRE episode #017 - Crazy frugal stuff we dofriends on FIRE episode #111 - Gift economies and buy nothing groupsFiends on FIRE episode #128 - Creative ways to save on medical expensesFlipp app - Flyers, shopping lists, weekly ads---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We're both on vacation, so no detailed episode notes this week!  Listen to the episode and we hope you enjoy the check-in while we're traveling.  ---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We start with a discussion on the role public libraries play in society.  They offer free resources to everyone and anyone, boost local economies, keep communities healthy and connected, and are a safe refuge for the homeless and underserved.  General tips for leveraging your local public library:Think about what's in your expenses now that you could be getting for free at your public library.  Every location has different books and resources, especially digital.  You can join multiple libraries. For example, if you have a rental property in another county or your parents live somewhere else, you can sign up for a library card in that county.  You can request that your library carry a book they don't currently have. Always check your public library first, and N=never buy a book unless you're public library doesn't have it.  You can quickly and easily request holds and transfers from other libraries.  Sometimes you have to be patient with wait times for digital or physical books.  Plan ahead.  The fantastic amenities and resources available at most public libraries:Physical books, audio books, and ebooks.  Libby and overdrive apps are free and connect to your library account. Kids books!  Teach your kids about audio books; they are great for road trips, extra bedtime after you've read to them, when they get older, and when they can't sleep.  Private meeting and study rooms. Computers and printer access.Events and activities for you and your kids.  Share some examples. Speakers too!  Summer reading challenges and prizes for kids.  They have kid, young adult, and adult programming such as exercise classes, craft classes with supplies, stories and s'mores, graphic novel book clubs, story time for little kids, robot crafts, teen book clubs, and more!Tickets to local attractions like the zoo, aquarium, museums, state parks, and more!Puzzles. Movies and music.  Magazines.  Newspapers.  Tables and work space. Free wifi. Wireless hotspots for 21 days at a time.  Use it for travel!Chromebook access for a week at a time.  Reference databases.  A few final public library tips and ideas:It's like a free coffee shop and coworking space, and you won't be tempted to buy something because they don't sell anything. Bring a water bottle and snack. They don't allow food, but you can discretely drink water or sneak a bit of a granola bar; just don't break out a sandwich and picnic and start eating it.  Librarians are so helpful and nice!  Ask them questions.  Be their friend!Explore different libraries around town!  Some of them are cool and different.  Our kids like seeing new libraries.  Some of them are pretty cool and modern or historic!  Fun spot to take your kids for study groups and homework.  Your kids have libraries at their schools also!Keep in mind the hours.  For example, our favorite library is 10 am-5 pm most days but is open until 8 pm three nights a week.   Top 3 takeaways:Join your public library!Visit it and ask someone at the front desk about the various benefits that could be unique in your area.  Setup a digital app like Libby for audio and ebooks.  Show References:Libby free app, by OverdriveHoopla AppFriends on FIRE episode #115 - How to learn anything for freeArticle: 7 reasons libraries are essential now more than everArticle: 23 reasons why your library is the most important place in townBook: Art of HappinessBook: Beautiful RuinsBook: Your New Relationship With Money: Mastering Money, Growing Wealth, and Finding Freedom in a Culture Trying to Make You Broke ---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In this discussion with Diandra from That Science Couple, we cover many topics, including:How her mom taught her to be frugal at an early age and to present what what you saved before what you spent.  How she got her masters without any debt by being a teaching assistant.She was initially very focused on how to grow in her job and financially.She was diagnosed with thyroid cancer at 23, which shifted her mindset on many things.The turning point where they had to decide if they wanted to travel or have a shiny apartment.The three focuses of That Science Couple: Financial independence, Lifestyle Medicine, and Minimalism.The power of combining all of these topics for greater success in life.Diandra's recommendation on how and where to get started.If everything is important, then nothing is.  Specific and tactical tips to improve your lifestyle today.Inflation's impact on the cost of food, and a detailed comparison from their blog.  Show References:That Science Couple BlogArticle: Keys to a full life with venn diagramArticle: Eat for healthArticle: Accepting inflation, can you be frugal and eat healthy?Nutritionfacts.orgThe pomodoro techniqueBook: Dr. Dean Ornish's Program for Reversing Heart Disease: The Only System Scientifically Proven to Reverse Heart Disease Without Drugs or Surgery Book: Prevent And Reverse Heart Disease: The Revolutionary, Scientifically Proven, Nutrition-Based CureBook: How to Stop Worrying and Start Living---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

In this discussion, we cover many topics, including:Thoughts on if Maggie has slowed down yet or not.How they've been spending their time.Habit tracking.How relaxed they both are and how sleep has improved.They are hitting a nice stride of slowing down and relaxing.The immediate feeling of more margin in their lives.Being more present and engaged.The feeling of being untethered from a lack of structure.The discomfort that comes from being untethered and not having forced structure into your day.Parkinson's law: “Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.”How they are feeling about work with six weeks of distance between it.Maggie's reading Cashing Out right now and highly recommends it!Greg's 30-day social media and news cleanse.Maggie's realization of appreciating the present moment and not worrying about how the future will unfold.The feeling of financial freedom.They are optimistic for the future and starting to feel all the feelings they were hoping for in retirement, such as slowing down, being more present, and feeling less stressed.Show References:Way of Life habit tracking appParkinson's lawBook: Cashing Out: Win the Wealth Game by Walking AwayBook: Your New Relationship With Money: Mastering Money, Growing Wealth, and Finding Freedom in a Culture Trying to Make You BrokeRich Roll podcast: Extend your life: Peter Diamandis, MD on the future of health & longevity science---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

Episode Summary:In this episode, we answer a bunch of recent listener questions.  We answer questions on partying off your mortgage versus saving more into a 529 for college, if now is the right time to put money into the market, how much money to keep in a cash emergency fund, and how to balance income while planning for early retirement.  We then discuss how to breakup with your financial advisor, rental properties, and Roth IRA conversion ladders.  Episode Notes:We start off by sharing a recent listener story and win, and then dig into some listener questions:Should I pay off extra on my mortgage or save more into a 529?Is now the right time to start putting money into the market?How much money should I keep in cash in an emergency fund?Do you track your tax payment in your spend tracker or your annual expenses?How should I plan for and balance where my income comes from in early retirement versus later in life from retirement funds?How do I break up with my financial advisor?How did we get our first rental property, and how much did we put down?Would we consider an airBNB property versus a long-term rental?Can you share a more detailed explanation about Roth IRA conversions and Roth IRA conversion ladders?Top 3 takeaways:Send us your questions! We will answer them directly or in an episode like this.  If you send us really detailed questions it's sometimes hard for us to answer without knowing more about your personal situation.  We have considered doing some financial coaching, but likely won't do anything with that until later in 2022 after the summer, or in 2023.  But feel free to reach out if you're particularly interested and eager to learn more.Show references:Friends on FIRE episode #025 - College – Choosing your ApproachFriends on FIRE episode #27 - Why Tracking Net Worth MattersFriends on FIRE episode #15 - Expense Tracking Gone WildNet worth tracking spreadsheetExpense tracking spreadsheetFriends on FIRE episode #090 - Why you don't need a financial planner---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money

We start with an update on how we're doing against our 1 million point and mile goal for 2022.  We've signed up for 9 different cards totalling 800K+ in points and miles, and we've been able to reach the spend targets through already planned expenses in our lives.  We talk through a number of things in this episode:A refresher on how travel hacking works.How you should value and redeem points and miles for tavel.How we are using points to fund our summer travel plans.  Show References:Friends on FIRE Episode #134 - Travel hacking our way to 1 million points in 2022Award Wallet - Free Loyalty Points Tracker (they also have a paid version)The Points Guy websiteThe Points Guy Free Travel Tracking AppThe Points Guy Beginning Guide to Points and MilesThe Points Guy - Best Credit Cards---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at:  friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money