Long time friends JD Stettin and Mordecai Rosenberg record their musings, book recommendations, spiritual conversations, and the path to letting go and moving forward.
Mordecai Rosenberg & JD Stettin
This podcast episode features an interview with Daniel Mate, co-author of New York Times Bestseller -- The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture. Daniel is a composer, lyricist, and accomplished playwright known for his work in musical theater. Daniel is also the creator of the Mental Chiropractic method. Daniel discusses his musical journey, his unique approach to addressing challenges through mental chiropractic, and his insights into parent-child relationships. The episode offers valuable insights for listeners interested in mental health, music composition, and understanding parent-adult child relationship dynamics.Daniel Mate shares his experiences and insights into his mental chiropractic process, a unique approach that helps individuals overcome their stuckness. He explains that mental chiropractic involves setting intentions, identifying and challenging perspectives that block those intentions, and gaining new perspectives and choices. Through several examples, Daniel demonstrates the transformative power of mental chiropractic in helping individuals align with their intentions and break free from limitations.Daniel discusses his recent project, "Hello Again," which explores parent/adult-child relationships. The conversation delves into the complexities of adult parent-child relationships – an area that has been ignored in parenting literature, emphasizing the formative influence parents have on their children and the impact it has on individuals. Daniel explores the inherent structural imbalances in these relationships and highlights the need to examine one's childhood and past experiences to understand how they shape the present.Overall, this podcast episode provides a wide-ranging conversation with Daniel Mate, covering his musical career, his unique approach to addressing challenges through mental chiropractic, and his exploration of parent-child relationships. The episode offers valuable insights for listeners interested in creative music composition, mental health, and understanding the complexities of family dynamics.0.00 - Daniel Mate on speaking.3:32 - Disillusionment.16:53 - The power of collaboration in musical theater.22:15 - What does alignment mean to you?29:34 - What does mental chiropractic mean?34:54 - Memorable conversations on walks.50:43 - The relationship between the adult child and parent is unique.55:26 - Writing the Myth of Normal with his dad.1:00:34 - Triggers from an Adult Child
Check out this thought-provoking podcast discussing personality assessments and self-perception. Join Mordecai, JD Stettin, and Joey Hirsh as they share their experiences with various personality assessments, like Kolbe and Enneagram, and explore why idealize certain personality types. Dive into the conversation on self-acceptance, individuality, and the influence of cultural narratives on our perception of heroes.
In this podcast, Mordecai Rosenberg, Simon Brief, and JD Stettin discuss the transformative power of grief and pain, the importance of staying present in the moment, and the concept of gratitude. Brief shares his experience with meditation, and they also share anecdotes and memories of their father-in-law. Join them as they discuss topics of spiritual development and personal growth.
In this podcast episode, JD and Mordecai are joined by guest, Emily Shaughnessy. Emily was raised in an evangelical Presbyterian family. Her education was individualized as she was homeschooled until high school. Her parents instilled in her the importance of giving back to others. Although Emily moved away from a traditional religious structure, her path brought her to deeper levels of spirituality and connection to God. Emily's dad was a role model for her in terms of constantly giving to the community and giving of himself, which has influenced Emily's worldview and sparked her mission orientation. Her childhood experiences helped shape her views of humanity and the world and allowed her to follow her passions in making the world around her a better place.Emily is active in building “asset-based communities,” which is a grassroots approach that focuses on individuals and what they bring to the table, rather than an outside perspective of what needs to be fixed. Influences in her life include Alan Watts, Buddhist thinkers, Pema Chödrön, Marshall Rosenberg and his work on nonviolent communication, and the Internal Family Systems framework. These influences have helped her move away from a good-bad duality and toward a more compassionate understanding of herself and others.00:04 Introduction to today's guest.01:32 Emily's upbringing and mission-driven worldview.06:18 What's changed in her view of spirituality since her parents.11:02 Breaking apart the binary perspective of our society.15:54 What have been some of your learnings from any other surprising stories?21:25 What are some of the influences that have shaped his life?27:01 How did you get through the loss of your father?33:32 The dying to be reborn and the shedding of some of the ideas and cultures and parts of oneself.38:00 The idea of “being like us” is part of human nature.43:58 What are some of the things that really like light up Emily's life?
JD's younger brother Jesse is a guest on the show and shares about his experience from a 10-day Vipassana meditation retreat, where the focus was on building sensory awareness of physical sensations in the body. The retreat can be physically and mentally challenging, but can lead to feelings of gratitude, realization, and accomplishment. Jesse personally found that the retreat had a profound impact on them, leading to a fundamental shift in behavior. 0:03 Welcome Jesse Stettin to the show.3:21 What is the Vipassana?9:55 Did you get the daily schedule before you got there or was it a surprise?16:50 What else do you do that many hours a day?21:46 How has meditation impacted his day-to-day life?25:47 What has changed in Jessie's experience of life?30:41 JD's right turn in high school and the impact on his practice.34:47 What was the defining moment in Jesse's life when he made the left turn?41:02 Sibling relationships are very different with a child.
SUMMARY:On this episode, JD and Mordecai welcome special guest, Dr. Joseph Hirsch as they discuss his experience in the Orthodox community. The conversation touches on themes of self-acceptance, identity, and the relationship between religion and personal beliefs.
SUMMARY:Morty and JD explore lessons 16 & 17. It's understandable to want to constantly seek out new experiences and learning opportunities, but it's important to also make time for rest and reflection. TIME STAMPS:00:01 Here we are, again. Still perplexed. I am at least. How are you doing today?04:18 Lesson 16 and 17, which are about neutral thoughts and neutral things. 09:34 A neutral result is impossible because a neutral thought is impossible..13:05 Now there's a good and bad...16:34 In American Western culture, where it is so much of a focus on doing and achieving21:52 That thought sparked another thought about like this, this book that I just finished yesterday called The Sympathizer25:33 Just noticing the flavor of our thoughts27:21 Yeah, I'll choose mint chocolate chip
SUMMARY:In this episode, JD and Mordecai continue their discussion on things we think we see and we really don't. They discuss how we are improving every day and how our brain processes stories based on our past.TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - The meaninglessness of meaninglessness0:50 - What's it like when you wake up and you're on vacation in your dream?1:09 - Much of the work our brains are doing is kind of backfilling and trying to make sense of what it is2:20 - What do you think about the idea of our brains as “brains?”2:40 - What's it like when you're tired?4:33 - When you're in a hotel, it's like you have to run a show7:28 - "It's like being in a movie where there's always something else."9:30 - How long does it take to get to the point where you're saying “everything is meaningless?”?11:23 - What does it mean to be “effective?”
SUMMARY:Mordecai and JD explore week #2 of A Course in Miracles and discuss the reasons why we often think we are upset.TIMESTAMPS:0:04 - You can't lose what you never had3:19 - Why do we do anything? Why do we feel good?6:07 - Start with the premise that whatever you're thinking is not the real thought and see how that unfolds10:55 - Sometimes I find that frustrating or maddening and other times it gets a bit gentler and in rereading these chapters15:29 - You have what you get and what you can never lose21:45 - What is it about experiences that stay with us more than others?25:49 - How to deal with the slippery slope of expectations30:38 - You can't hold on to the present
SUMMARY:On this episode, Mordecai and JD begin their journey through A Course in Miracles and discuss why you should not believe everything you see.TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - How would you describe A Course In Miracles?8:06 - What does “nothing means anything” mean?12:38 - When you're in problem solving mode, everything is a way to help or get in our way19:07 - When you're communicating with someone who is upset, you don't have to solve it25:15 - The importance of label making in the natural world30:14 - Changing the meaning of our thoughts and feelings36:42 - We are the meaning makers in our lives40:34 - Dancing to make life a dance
SUMMARY:In this episode, guest Traverse Fournier joins JD and Mordecai as they discuss goals, loss and grief, and moving forward in life with a positive impact.TIMESTAMPS: 2:09 - When did you first start thinking that there was something else to this?8:29 - What happens when you hit your stride and then realize you're not going to be happy forever.14:20 - How thought plays into the process of grieving.18:45 - Grief and love are not the same.28:36 - Can you just continue without a little bit of understanding?31:36 - The intellectualizing of being in the woods. 35:17 - What's the purpose of your life?38:22 - The problem with self-help is that it's focused on yourself.40:10 - The self is not an independent entity.44:45 - The importance of having enriching experiences in your life.
JD and Mordecai discuss being vulnerable, connecting and sharing with others.Timestamps:0:00 - How much do you feel like this is a period of clarity?5:01 - We are meant to spend a lot of our time in connection with others.14:03 - Why we listen to podcasts.19:56 - Letting go via connection and sharing.28:01 - Taking an inventory of mental patterns and habits.32:52 - What's going on in our heads.38:55 - Lead with what you want to share.46:00 - Being vulnerable in the presence of others.
Mordecai and JD discuss the depths of relationships, the give and take, and effect of our emotions on those we are in relationship with.Timestamps: 0:51 - Positive Inward Feelings and How It Affects Others8:19 - Giving vs Wanting15:22 - Taking the Long Way18:49 - We Create the Relationship by How We Hold the Other Person21:50 - Seeing Your Value Through Someone Else's Eyes27:22 - When You're Heart is Full, You Have More for Others
Throughout all of their discussions regarding their own emotions, JD and Mordecai turn the tables a bit and examine their emotions toward others.Timestamps:0:08-02:10 Emotions/Feelings Toward Others02:10-5:15 Desire to Elicit Reaction Through Emotions05:15-09:08 Guilt: A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy?09:20-14:16 Fear and Jealousy14:17- 15:56 Programmed Fear16:41-18:50 Manifested vs Actual Threat19:19-21:12- Nature vs Nurture, Programmed vs DNA/GeneticsBooks Referenced:The Body: A Guide for Occupants by Bill BrysonLetting Go: The Pathway of Surrender by David R Hawkins
In this shorter yet jam-packed episode, Mordecai and JD speculate on the mind and the body and how that contributes with letting go.Books/Writers Referenced:Bill Bryson - The Body: A Guide for OccupantsMichael A. Singer - The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond YourselfDavid R. Hawkins - Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender (Not sure if this is the correct book)Barry Magid - Ordinary Mind: Exploring the Common Ground of Zen and Psychotherapy (Not sure if this is the correct book)Podcast:The Tim Ferriss Show #485: Jerry Seinfeld — A Comedy Legend's Systems, Routines, and Methods for SuccessResources:Misophonia Institute: https://misophoniainstitute.org/Yeiush as mentioned by JD Stettin: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/YeiushTimestamps:0:01 - 4:40 Misophonia and Physical Response4:41 - 8:00 When Physical Response Becomes Emotional8:01 - 12:37 Where's the Line?12:38 - 16:04 Learning Responses and Letting Go16:05 - 18:26 Coaching or Psychotherapy?18:27 - 22:56 Playing Whack-A-Mole22:57 - 26:51 Embracing Yeiush
JD and Mordecai have reached the top of the mountain, they are committing to peace, analyzing their emotions, simply breathing, and enjoying the chaos of the human experience.Timestamps1:15 - What is Peace?12:24 - Managing Your Internal Experience With External Anger15:11 - Everyone Has Experienced Some Sort of Peace22:47 - Call to Action - Just Breathe32:11 - Commitment to Finding the Peace36:13 - Defining Success by Massive Accomplishments42:25 - When, With Whom and What Do I Do?53:36 - Enjoy the Chaos
In this perplexing episode, Mordecai and JD examine their journey from the perplexed to really noticing what they find perplexing, how to let go, and how to love themselves.Timestamps:0:01 - 06:36 Perplexed 06:36 - 10:27 The Antidote 10:27 -15:05 Pursuit/Spirituality 15:05 - 18:11 Movement 18:11 - 25:48 Letting Go & Love25:48 - 28:19 Breath & Heart 28:19 - 35:38 Self-Love 35:38 - 47:00 NoticingBooks:The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver Burkeman
Mordecai and JD speak with the fascinating Sara Yoheved Rigler. We learn about her spiritual journey from conservative Judaism to living in an ashram and being introduced to the life of the soul. She explains how the Hindu goddess of death brough her back to the Jewish God, and how she is currently fulfilling her purpose in life.You can find Sara at her website: sararigler.comTimestamps0:01-3:52 Sara Yoheved Rigler Introduction5:13-19:52 From Brandeis to the Ashram19:55-28:00 Spirituality28:01-30:25 Humanistic Psychology: God as The Most Noble Part of a Human Being30:51- 39:34 Religion of Law or a Religion of Love?39:35- 47:39 Thank God for 5 Things You've Never Thanked Him For47:32-54:13 Religion of Detachment vs Religion of Connection54:14- 1:02.15 Goal of Judaism1:04.39-1:11.19 Sara's God-Given Mission
JD and Mordecai run through how we accept and maybe struggle to accept the many emotions we struggle with.Timestamps:0:02-07:32 Acceptance 07:32- 12:55 Acceptance & Courage 12:55-19:15 Acceptance & Judgment 19:15-25:39 Acceptance & Discipline 25:39-29:27 Acceptance & Desire 29:27-35:03 Acceptance & Anger 35:03 -42:07 Acceptance & Human Nature 42:07- 47:04 Perspective 47:04- 53:27 Metaverse/Matrix53:27-55:13 Accepting Fate 55:13-57:59 Acceptance & Uncertainty 57:59-1:01 Free Diving
Mordecai and JD discuss the many facets of courage, procrastination, and delegation.Timestamps:0:00 - 4:01 Courage is I Can4:02 - 8:08 The Inverse of Courage8:09 - 14:13 Resumes, Eulogies, and Rescuing Bugs14:27 - 28:11 Acting on Courage28:13 - 34:30 The Other Side of the Coin34:31 - 52:09 Procrastination and the Pandora's Box52:17 - 57:07 The Power of DelegationWriters Referenced:Dan Sullivan, "The Gap and The Gain"David BrooksMichael Singer
JD and Mordecai continue their discussion on pride, focusing on the ego, identity, and unique ability.Timestamps:0:21 - Pride, It's Everywhere2:45 - Unique Ability11:54 - Being Attached to Opinions16:33 - This is the Right Way18:47 - The "I" In Everything22:08 - Very Small Way to See Yourself25:04 - $500 Flip Flops31:17 - The Need to Identify39:36 - We Can't Just Reboot the Software44:32 - Just Being
There are many aspects to pride, how it develops, how it affects and impacts our behaviors and beliefs. JD and Mordecai examine the effects of pride on their own lives and perspectives.Timestamps:0:45-2:19 How Pride Develops 02:19-7:20 Pride and The Ego7:20-12:21 Pride and Praising 12:21-17:47 Humility 17:47- 27:17 Perspective 27:17- 32:09 Pride and Beliefs32:09-43:13 Pride and God
What's more relatable than being angry? JD and Mordecai discuss the causes, the issues, the motives behind anger and their own experiences in processing and learning through that anger.Timestamps:1:02 - Growing up Angry3:16 - What Causes Anger?13:42 - Anger About Anger19:32 - When Is Anger Wrong?23:37 - Anger Doesn't Need Fixing29:24 - Injustice Collectors34:45 - The Importance of Being Right!41:00 - You're Either on the Winning Team or the Learning Team47:00 - I Felt Angry and That's Ok
Are desire and choices intrinsically interlinked? How does what we want drive our behavior? JD and Mordecai discuss desire, happiness, and choices in this episode.Books/Writers Referenced:Artist's Way by Julia CameronStrength to Strength by Arthur C. BrooksWanting What You Want by Dan SullivanTimestamps:0:41 What is Desire?5:29 Desire Drives Your Behavior12:15 The Thought of Achieving Your Desire by Following That Desire?24:01 Never Ending Stream of Desires25:38 Can You Choose to be Happy?31:47 What Matters in the End36:00 Do We Deserve It?53:24 Want What You Want
Perhaps their self-proclaimed most qualified emotion, Mordecai and JD discuss the ramifications of growing up with guilt, its ties to fear, love, and anger, and how it relates to God and faith.Writers Referenced:Alan WattsCheryl StrayedDavid HawkinsTimestamps:0:09-03:45 Experiencing Guilt and Different Emotions 03:49- 12:06 Is Guilt Tied To Fear?12:09- 18:08 Feeling Guilty 19:08-23:15 Growing Up With Guilt 26:47-29:00 God & Faith31:36-33:22 Anger 33:24 -58:44 Guilt and Love
JD and Mordecai have a fascinating discussion about the dark side of spirituality, the battle of good and evil in our minds and in our actions.Books/Writers:Modern Man in Search of a Soul by Carl Jung"Please Call Me By My True Names" by Thich Nhat Hanh"Insights at the Edge" - a podcast hosted by Damien EcholsThe Moral Bucket List by David BrooksHealing Your Back Pain by John SarnoAwareness by Anthony de MelloUntethered Soul by Michael Alan SingerAlan WattsTimestamps:11:21 - Being Good, Being Bad18:59 - Online Assessments19:53 - Acknowledge the Shadow Side23:12 - Being Invisible27:17 - If It Doesn't Feel Good, Don't Do It30:50 - Opinions of Others38:55 - Acting Despite Fear41:49 - Choosing Wisely49:29 -- Building our Own Fear
Books/Writers Referenced:Ram DassLetting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsUntethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael Alan SingerTimestamps:0:24 - 3:28: What is Fear?3:29 - 8:46: Is Fear Future Oriented?8:47 - 13:19: What Are We Actually Feeling?13:20 - 17:57: Giving Up The Fear17:58 - 21:09: Desire for Control21:10 - 25:38: Learning to See the Fears and Learning to Let Them Go25:38 - 31:47: Being Alone with the Fear31:48 - 38:26: Fear is Healed by Love38:27 - 41:33: People Are Not Just Their Beliefs41:34 - 44:47: Loving in Just Your Existence44:48 - End: Fear and Love: Reactive vs Proactive
JD and Mordecai discuss the perplexing depths of grief, how we are affected by loss, and how accepting that loss as reality is a major step in resolving grief.Books/Writers Referenced:David Hawkins"Untethered Soul" by Michael Singer (Podcast)GangajiByron Katie"Midnight Gospel" (Netflix)Timestamps:02:23-10:34 Feeling Grief15:50- 26:36 Fear of Loss27:48-32:49 Selfish Attachment33:25-36:33 Letting Go of Attachment 37:50-39:39 Resolving the Feeling43:16-49:51 Reality of Grief
Mordecai and JD dig into why we react the way we do when things don't go as planned.References:Twelve Steps and Twelve TraditionsInfinite Jest by David Foster WallaceA Course in Miracles by Helen SchucmanShawn StevensonDavid HawkinsByron KatieBatman BeginsTimestamps:01:51-03:12 When Things Don't Go as Planned06:11-06:51 Beating Yourself Up07:48-11:49 Stuck on the Emotional Rung of Your Plan18:22-25:19 This is the Work20:45-27:29 How Far Are You From the Breakthrough?29:54-31:30 Does Mindset Affect Outcome?31:31-39:14 Apathy to Courage39:15-46:25 Are We Powerless?
Books/Writers Referenced:Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsByron KatieMichael Singer's "Sounds True" PodcastTimestamps:00:36 - 13:40 Blame and Apathy 15:06 - 18:52 Blaming Others 21:41- 24:16 Blame and Guilt25:30 - 33:52 Good and Bad of Blame 34:57 - 38:04 Where Do We Learn Blame? 41:34 - 47:07 Accountability 50:16- 55:25 Gratitude
JD and Mordecai continue on their path of perplexity, examining how apathy is "buying into our smallness."Books/Writers Referenced:Alan WattsMarcus AureliusDavid HawkinsTimestamps:00:42 - 19:04 What is Apathy?19:04 - 30:07 Scale of Emotions 30:07- 32:04 Ladder of Emotions32:04 - 37:59 Apathy and Depression 37:59 - 43:13 Spiritual and Philosophical Traditions43:13 - 51:04 Acting Out Emotion
JD and Mordecai examine the depths of our emotions, the way in which we perceive and react to them, as well as how reframing these emotions can help us let go of the past.Books/Writers Referenced:The Doors of Perception by Aldous HuxleyTimestamps:00:43 - Is Stress Really a Negative Emotion?9:50 - Dealing with Emotions in the Order of Which They are Received.21:32 - Fear of Losing Positive Emotion Creates a Negative Outcome24:22 - Is it Just Part of the Cycle?29:54 - Being in Touch with Reality35:18 - Letting Go of the Past55:51 - Being in the Reality of Oneself
Mordecai and JD discuss the perplexing relationship between God, religion, and spirituality.Books Referenced:How to be a Good Creature by Sy MontgomeryThe Patterning Instinct by Jeremy LansTimestamps:2:27: What does it mean to be spiritual?15:04: Do you need to believe in God to be spiritual?21:49: What is religion?34:33: Is one spirituality enhanced through religion?
Mordecai and JD specifically discuss guilt in this discussion on how we process, recognize, and control our emotions.Books Referenced:Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsThe Artist's Way by Julie CameronTalmudBibleWriters/Thinkers Referenced:Byron KatieBuddhaJesusAlan WattsTimestamps:00:00 - 02:37 Mood Meter App: Checking Your Mood 02:37 - 09:00 Recognizing Emotions 09:00 - 12:28 Locate the Feelings in Our Body 12:37 - 21:50 Guilt on Emotion Scale24:34 - 36:36 Guilt and Shame 37:54 - 43:43 Controlling the Emotion 43:43- 55:36 Letting Go of the Idea That We Have To Do Anything
JD and Mordecai dive deeper into the realm of emotion, moods, and climbing out of that negative emotion rabbit hole.Books Referenced:Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsHealing Backpain by John SarnoThe Headless Way by Richard LangWriters/Thinkers Referenced:Alan WattsAristotleCarl JungRam DassTimestamps:00:00 - 05:56 The 4 Categories of the Mood Meter App 05:56 - 12:52 Noticing Your Feelings12:52 - 37:17 Locating the Feelings: Addressing Feelings Before They Become Thoughts37:17 - 44:32 Checking In With Yourself44:32 - 50:15 Spiritual Teachers 50:15 - 58:01 Being Kind to Ourselves
JD and Mordecai discuss the Letting Go method, intellectualism, awareness, and the pressure of time.Books Referenced:Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsHow Emotions Are Made by Lisa Feldman BarrettThe Mood Meter by Lisa Feldman BarrettWriters/Thinkers Referenced:Alan WatsonRam DassAnthony de MelloRichard SchwartzByron KatieEckhart TolleTimestamps:00:00 - 03:06 Letting Go: The Guide From the Perplexed03:06 - 09:27 The Letting Go Method: Getting Comfortable with Uncomfortable Emotions09:27 - 19:50 Locate the Feelings: Addressing Feelings Before They Become Thoughts19:50 - 27:17 Intellectualism: The Mind is the Shield of the Heart27:17 - 35:08 Who Am I? The Different Components and Paths35:08 - 49:07 Awareness: Learn to Sit With the Pain, Feel the Conflict49:07 - 52:53 The Distraction of Beliefs - The Pressure of Time52:53 - 59:37 Next Episode: Guilt Impedes Awareness / Positive Emotions - A Good Entry Point to Awareness
JD Stettin and Mordecai Rosenberg record a conversation around the theme of Letting Go.Books Referenced:Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender by David HawkinsFour Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver BurkemanThe Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver BurkemanThe Silva Mind Control Method by Jose SilvaThe Power of Now by Eckhart TolleWriters/Thinkers Referenced:Marie KondoAlan WattsByron KatieWim HofRam DassTara BrachChimamanda Ngozi AdichieTimestamps: 0:30-9:00 What is Letting Go, Enlightenment, Happiness 9:00-15:00 Basic Human Desires15:00-19:00 Voice of God19:00-26:00 Why are we recording this podcast?26:00-32:00 Lonely vs. Doing Things Together32:00-39:00 Moving Forward / Getting Somewhere39:00-51:00 Human Experience51:00-54:00 Holding On is Letting Go
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