Quit Dieting for Good

This episode is not what I had planned for today. Rather than go ahead with my regular recording schedule, I'm here to let you know that I'm going to be pressing pause on the show. This does not mean I'm closing my business! Intuitive eating is still the heart and soul of my practice, and I'll continue to see clients (and get ready to enroll more amazing women into my new membership program!). However, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed in my life at the moment (more on that below), and the podcast was on the list of things I don't "have" to be investing time into right now. If you've been feeling a little frazzled yourself, let this be your invitation to take a deep breath and see what you might be able to press pause on in your own life. Listen in to hear about: Life Update: The Boys Life Update: Lack of Freedom Pressing Pause Focusing On Growth Throw-Back Episodes Top 10 Teaching Podcasts & Top 5 Interviews Get the full show notes here: caitlinball.com/2021/04/pressing-pause Get my free training here: www.caitlinball.com/training  Connect with my on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/caitlinballhealth/ 

Holly Toronto is a body image coach and spiritual mentor who works with intuitive eating and spirituality. If you're curious, questioning, and or growing your own spirituality, this is a great episode for you! We discuss: The Straw That Broke the Camel's Back Giving Herself Time to Heal Intuitive Eating & Spirituality The Power of Knowing That Bodies Are Not Objects Starting The Spiritual Journey Trusting Your Body As Your Guide You can find the full show notes here: www.caitlinball.com/2021/04/intuitive-eating-spirituality I'm on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/caitlinballhealth/  Connect with Holly here: Free Body Gratitude Meditation: https://hollytorontocoaching.lpages.co/body-gratitude-meditation/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/holly.toronto/ Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/143221746427796 Website: www.hollytoronto.com

This past year had plenty of emotions, and navigating uncharted territory while dealing with lots of emotions can result in using food as coping mechanism. From boredom (hello quarantine!) to frustration to loneliness to feeling celebratory; if you use food to deal with an emotion, that's emotional eating. We all do it, and only we can decide if it's working for us or not. On this episode, we'll dive in to: Why Emotional Eating Isn't "Good" or "Bad" When It's NOT Emotional Eating 3 Tips For When It IS Emotional Eating Choosing the BEST Solution For Yourself And more! Plus, here are the links I reference in the show: TRAINING: www.caitlinball.com/training  SHOW NOTES: www.caitlinball.com/2021/03/stop-emotional-eating/ DESERT EVERYDAY: www.caitlinball.com/2021/03/dessert-everyday/ FEEL YOUR FEELINGS: www.caitlinball.com/2019/03/episode-22-feel-your-feelings-instead-of-eating-them/  RELEASE RESTRICTIONS: www.caitlinball.com/2019/09/intuitive-eating-101-letting-go-restrictions/  IG: www.instagram.com/caitlinballhealth/

Wondering if you can eat dessert everyday? Experiment! Try some different kinds of desserts (I recently tried Oreos again, and realized I don't love them that much). Have them in different settings (your coffee shop patio, in the tub, at the table). Indulge with different people (your kids, while on the phone with your best friend, with your husband). What felt good? What did you enjoy most? At the end of the day, only you know what is right for you. You don't need to work off of some sense of "good" or "bad", and you don't need to get outside approval. This is a fun chance to get to know more about yourself and your body! Resources & Links Mentioned:  Show Notes: www.caitlinball.com/2021/03/dessert-everyday/ Free, on-demand training to help you ditch food guilt and shame and feel free: www.caitlinball.com/training  For those who might be wondering if they have a sugar addiction: www.caitlinball.com/2018/12/episode-11-are-you-addicted-to-sugar/  Instagram: www.instagram.com/caitlinballhealth/ 

So....my body isn't exactly "bouncing back" to what it was pre-baby. And you know what? That's okay! Part of my intuitive eating practice right now is really learning how to love and appreciate my body as it is. That's an ever-evolving journey, and I wanted to give you a sneak peak into how it's going. I also want to be honest about the reality that this is an adjustment, and there are struggles. I'm so glad this is a safe place to dive into those! We'll talk about: Not Weighing or Measuring Myself Bringing Whole Food Into Our Home Sleeping When Tanner Sleeps Decreasing Caffeine Increasing Movement Practicing Body Gratitude And more! SHOW NOTES: www.caitlinball.com/2021/03/bouncing-back-after-baby/ INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/caitlinballhealth/ 

Alissa Rumsey is a registered dietician. She’s been in the intuitive eating space for years, and I’ve been following her for a quite a while myself. It’s a huge honor to have her on the podcast today. Alissa has a weight-inclusive nutrition practice, and recently published a new book, Unapologetic Eating. In this interview we talked about the unlearning you have to do as part of leaving dieting behind. Alissa has an awesome process for helping people become unapologetic eaters, and we get into that as well! When you grab my latest offer, you can get started unlearning your old beliefs and kicking dieting to the curb! I’m offering two lost-cost, drop-in coaching calls. These are for women who are ready to start loving their bodies (Body Image Call) and stop emotional eating (Emotional Eating Call). If you’d like to see what coaching could be like, this offer is for you! Feel free to take advantage of whichever call topic resonated most with you (or grab them both if you’re ready to really dive deep)! Becoming a Nutrition Therapist Although she’s officially a registered dietitian, Alissa prefers to use the term nutrition therapist because she feels it better encapsulates what she does with her clients. She’s also a certified intuitive eating counselor. Her weight-inclusive nutrition practice is located virtually, and she offers 1:1 guidance for those looking to liberate themselves from dieting! As a young kid, Alissa didn’t have many external inputs around her eating and body size. She didn’t experience shifts (and increased stressors) around eating and body size until mid-way through high school. She stopped playing basketball as she was going through puberty, and gained weight. Looking back she can see that the transition of puberty and the decrease in movement would have clearly and naturally led to weight gain. Living through it, however, she was concerned and started dieting. She also got a job at a gym, and became fascinated in health and nutrition. Ultimately, her career as a dietitian started from a very disordered place of eating and exercising. Her thoughts were often consumed about guilt connected to eating and movement. She found her identity getting wrapped up in being the “healthy” person, and she felt pressured to maintain a certain image. Shifting Perspectives on Diet Culture When Alissa started working in the ICU of a local hospital, she found it an interesting change of speed. She was used to focusing on ways people could decrease calories or size, but in the ICU the focus was often on ways to get people to consume enough nutrients. Their more urgent physical needs shifted the dietary focus in a positive way. During this time Alissa was also lucky to be surrounded by roommates and co-workers who had healthy relationships with food. Slowly her own perspective changed, and she found herself migrating towards intuitive eating naturally. A few years later, she discovered the official intuitive eating framework. After a bit more learning, she was sold. Intuitive eating made so much natural sense, and she knew she needed to incorporate it into her work. Weight stigma, size bias, and misleading information about the connection between health and weight captured her interest, and she knew she couldn’t simply look away. Thankfully, Alissa notes that many programs now have more information about intuitive eating and the Health At Every Size (HAES) movement. No one was talking about those things when Alissa was going through school. Now, they’re becoming more recognized! Unapologetic Eating Alissa’s new book, Unapologetic Eating, is available now! When you’re ready to let go of dieting, there is a lot of unlearning that needs to happen. Ultimately, unlearning diet culture is a huge part of being able to become an unapologetic eater. Alissa notes that everything we think we know about food, nutrition, health, wellness, and body size is something we’re taught at one point or another. That means we have a LOT of deeply held beliefs about these things! Because our culture is very anti-fat, that means we’ve been programmed to elevate certain bodies and devalue others. These are considered implicit biases because we don’t really think about them. They’ve just been instilled within us, and it’s key that we take the time to unlearn them if we want to become free. Alissa also reminds us that growth is often uncomfortable! She recognizes that she holds a lot of body privilege as someone who is white, cis-gendered, heterosexual, and straight sized. Readers may find themselves learning new information that challenges their perceptions of how worthy, valuable, or superior some of these culturally privileged indicators really are – and that can be unsettling. Read with an open mind, and be willing to explore new ideas and ask the hard questions! Unlearning Diet Culture Alissa had built a whole identify around being “a healthy dieting”. As she started unlearning diet culture, she had to realize that those identity markers weren’t as important as she had once made them. Releasing them, however, meant that she had find new ways of thinking about and understanding herself. She also had to confront a lot of old beliefs in order to begin to reconnect with her own body, needs, and feelings. That might require questioning old beliefs. You need to be willing to consider where your current beliefs have come from, and the impact they may be having on the way you’re living. Eventually, you’ll find yourself wanting to know: What can I do about this? Alissa thinks of that as the opportunity to go even deeper! There is so much to delve into when it comes to raising awareness, and it’s an ongoing process. Unpacking your own history with dieting, nutrition, body-love, and more yields all sorts of amazing information about who you are, what beliefs you hold, and how dieting may have contributed to your life as coping mechanism. It’s Not Linear None of this is linear! Start where you are, and lean into what you’re learning. As you deepen your awareness, you’ll find continual areas that you want to continue shifting and changing. Once you recognize a thought pattern or belief that you want to change, Alissa recommends trying the opposite and seeing what happens! Self-compassion is key here, as well as paying attention to your body and listening to the signals that are being sent. You have to get comfortable with sitting in things as well! The answers you find in the process of unlearning diet culture are rarely black & white or binary. Instead, there are many shades of grey, many ways of being, and many paths to understanding. The more you learn about yourself, your body, and your mind, the more ability you’ll have to build new patterns and create change! Alissa’s Intuitive Eating Framework Unapologetic Eating is set up in four sections: Fixing, Allowing, Feeling, Growing. Those sections mirror her intuitive eating framework as well. In Fixing, the focus is on understanding the history of dieting, nutrition, and body-acceptance. Unlearning these parts of diet culture are really foundational. Clients (and readers) are asked to consider how that information plays into their own experiences and lived reality when it comes to food, body-confidence, and so on. Once that is understand, they can move into Allowing themselves to begin creating changes. What will it look like to do something different? To reconnect to the self? The changes that occur during Allowing lead naturally into Feeling. As you start feeling into your body, you’ll often start to feel other emotions. Often, this is really uncomfortable. Self-compassion, honoring and respecting your body, and sitting with hard things are all key parts of feeling. Finally, there is a chance to really start Growing. Once you’re done trying to fix yourself, begin to allow yourself to be, feel your feelings and reconnect to your body…. You get to grow into the fullest version of yourself. How do you want to eat? Who are you? What do you want to do? There is so much to dig into here – embodiment, self-expression, passion, desire – and it’s really powerful to explore it all! Food can be an amazing entry point to learning more about the Self! The journey is so powerful. You don’t need to fix yourself, and once you stop trying — so much in your life opens up!  

Let’s talk about ways to stop food guilt! I recently talked to a client who was ready to dive even deeper into releasing her own food guilt, and it got me thinking about ways we could all do this. Before we start, I just want to say... Continuing with your intuitive eating practice, in general, is going to be the most helpful way to stop food guilt. Going back to the basics is a big key! So if your overall practice has been lagging, or if you’ve gotten a little off track with intuitive eating, I’d encourage you to do a refresh there! In this episode, I do have some valuable tips for before, during, and after experiencing potential food guilt. I’m super excited to share them — just want to be sure you remember that ongoing practice is the key! Footnote: I have a new opportunity for new clients! I’m going to be doing two “drop-in” coaching calls, and you have the opportunity to drop in. Just like gyms and yoga classes let you sample a class or two before you commit, I’m going to let you sample my Quit Dieting for Good coaching program! The calls are just $37, and you can sample either one, or both. They’ll be Feb 28th at 11am PST and March 14th at 11am PST. I’d love to see you there! 5 Tips to Stop the Food Guilt Tip #1 — Before You Eat: Before you eat, consider what food will actually satisfy your wants and needs in that moment. When you make a conscious choice to eat a food you have a desire to eat, it’s easier to own that decision! You’re also more likely to choose a food that can satisfy both wants and needs. That includes how it tastes, as well as how it makes your body feels. You might also be able to recognize more clearly when you’re choosing “want” foods, and be more likely to balance them with “need” foods as well. I find that conscious choices decrease my guilt levels a lot! For instance, I’ve been having some guilt about my son’s screen time lately. I notice that if I consciously decide I’m going to let him watch during a certain time span, I can let him do so without feeling guilty. But if I let him start watching and I just let time pass while I’m doing other things, working on my business, or scrolling my phone, I tend to feel more guilty. I feel more empowered and less guilty when I know I’ve made a choice, versus feeling that it “just happened”. Tip #2 — Before & While You Eat Try a mantra either before you eat, or while you eat! Something like: + Food is food. + There is no good food, and no bad food. + I get to decide what I want to eat. We have so many food stories that we’ve internalized — it can be hard to NOT feel guilty when we go against them! Using a mantra that reminds you about your new food beliefs and stories can help you have more confidence and less guilt. Tip #3 — While You’re Eating Take the time to enjoy what you’ve decided to eat. Often we feel guilty when we just consume food with no real enjoyment or appreciation. When we consciously decide what we want to eat, and then allow ourself to really savor and enjoy that food, it’s easier to feel good while we eat. Taking that time to enjoy is a reminder that food can be really fun. And if guilty feelings pop up, knowing that you truly enjoyed it can give you the affirmation that eating it was a good choice that are empowered to make. Nothing to feel guilty about at all! Tip #4 — After You Eat If you feel guilt creeping in after you’ve eaten, ask yourself why. Is it because you don’t physically feel good after eating that food? Do you think you aren’t “supposed” to eat it? Are you afraid you’ll gain weight? All of those (and more) can be reasons that our minds trigger us to feel guilty about what we’ve eaten. Many women especially feel guilty about food because of the connection to gaining weight. If that’s you, I’d love to have you check out these two episodes: Body Acceptance and the Desire to Lose Weight and Three Tangible Ways to Love Your Body. Praciting body love can help you release the stress about losing weight, which is another big piece of the puzzle when it comes to releasing guilt! Tip #5: Before Next Time You can’t fail at intuitive eating. No matter how you feel before, during, or after eating, you can use that as feedback to help you next time you’re eating. And as for food guilt? When you feel it coming on, use it as a trigger to start the process of figuring out information can actually help you. Questions like: + What did you eat? + Why did you eat it? + How did it make your body feel? + What would you do differently next time? Can help you think through the kind of conscious choices you want to make when you’re eating. And remembering to really consider how your body feels is a chance to stay present and practice body-love, which is a super important component of intuitive eating! Asking these questions can also help you feel productive and channel your energy into something positive that feels good! Instead of wallowing in guilt or letting stress ruin your day, take positive action and reframe it as something you can use to know yourself even better! (Also, just a reminder that you can access this free training on-demand whenever you’d like: How to Ditch Food Guilt and Body Shame to Gain Confidence and Feel Free!) Intuitive Eating Questions? Have an intuitive eating question? You can connect with me on Facebook or Instagram, or send me an email at caitlin@caitlinball.com and I’d be happy to connect you with a resource or previous podcast that might be of help. (Or maybe I’ll even end up making a new episode!)

Today’s interview is with one of my clients – Katy! I know everyone enjoys a good success story, and I also want you to hear what’s possible when you have the success and accountability you need to make your goals happen! Katy first started dieting as a young girl, and today you’ll hear about her whole journey. The results? Well…the title says it all! This is a celebration of how Katy quit dieting for good. This is an amazing interview for anyone who might be currently dieting, testing the intuitive eating waters, or considering working with a health coach. (And if you’d like to join the Quit Dieting for Good program yourself, you can find that info HERE. I 100% believe in your ability to quit dieting for good — just like Katy!) Let’s Meet Katy! Katy lives in Philadelphia, and is a singer and voice teacher. She found me on Instagram (shout out to my amazing IG community!) right at the start of Covid, and joined the program not too long after. Before intuitive eating, Katy shares that dieting had been part of her life for about as long as she could remember. She was eating Smart Ones and dieting food since elementary school. At the time, she remembers being a little embarrassed about it….but also that her house was filled with dieting-related food because that’s what her mom was eating. And Katy wanted to eat that special dieting food too. She also remembers that she was bigger than all her friends. When a neighbor that was 6 years older passed on some clothes that were already too small for her, it was the last straw! Katy begged her mom to let her start dieting so she could lose weight. Finally, her mom agreed. She started with Weight Watchers, and throughout the rest of her school career her weight fluctuated a lot. She lost a lot of weight…and she’d gain it back and start again. Intense Pressure As a dancer and performer, Katy put a lot of pressure on herself. Her teachers did as well. She was told that she was incredibly talented, and her freshmen year of college was even told she had the talent to perform on Broadway. She was also told that if she wanted to make that happen, she had to lose weight. Katy already knew that. After forcing herself into through more dieting cycles, she left the dance/performance part of the program to focus on singing alone. Eventually she took up running, and added in calorie counting as well. With the advent of fitness apps she started tracking every single calorie she put into her mouth, until she realized it was becoming an obsession. How to Stop Binge Eating Katy found intuitive eating after another bad night of binge eating. In fact, she ordered her first intuitive eating books after googling “how to stop binge eating”. Although the principles were amazing….Katy’s first approach to intuitive eating was still pretty diet-based. She still wanted to lose weight, and she approached it from a place of wanting to change her body. Gradually she cycled through other things: weight lifting, keto, macro counting. The desire to lose weight, and the idea that controlling food was going to make her life better, were constant companions. Katy even tried to tell herself that she could do intuitive eating AND count macros. She tried to listen to her body’s needs while also following diet-based plans. And honestly…it just wasn’t working. How Katy Quit Dieting for Good Then, she found me! Katy wanted to feel better. She wanted to be done binge eating, and she wanted to have a good relationship with food. Deep down, she also knew that her first go around with intuitive eating hadn’t been a true experience. (She had still been treating it like a diet, and she knew that.) Watching her mom still counting calories while in her 70’s also felt profoundly sad to Katy. She was starting to see that a dieting-mindset didn’t ever seem to just go away, and that she was going to have to change something in her life if she didn’t want to continue obsessing over food into old age. She had also starting following more body positive folks on Instagram, and through that she came across my account. After one final check-in, she knew she was ready to quit dieting for good! How Quit Dieting for Good Was Different The community connections and guidance were a huge part of Katy’s success! Having others to lean on, talk to, and turn to were helpful parts of the program that enabled her to really succeed. The first time she tried intuitive eating she had done it alone, and that solitude had let her dip a toe in without really going all the way. She had never really released her dieting mindset, and she hadn’t had accountability or support to guide her into doing so. When she joined the Quit Dieting for Good program, however, she had both of those things! She had also decided to fully trust the process, even when it uncomfortable. That was a pivotal part of how Katy quit dieting for good. She was ready to believe in herself, and to build a relationship with her own intution and body. One of Katy’s biggest lifestyle transformations during the program has been allowing herself to bring any and every food into her house. Intuitive eating has taught her that she can enjoy any food….and that some of those things she used to binge on aren’t even that enjoyable. She had only eaten them the way she had because she had them up on a pedestal in her mind…and once they were just food that she was free to eat if she wanted it…she didn’t need to binge. How Quit Dieting for Good Was Hard Katy gained weight on the program, and that was HARD. At one point she had a total meltdown, and worried that she was going to have to count calories for her entire life. After her “fit”, I had her make a list of why she was doing this in the first place. Katy made the list….and it reminded her of why she had wanted to quit dieting in the first place. As she relfected, she was able to take herself to that next level of acceptance. She knew she was more than just a “size”…and that she could learn to accept her body as it was, instead of for what she had been trying to make it be. Katy shares that she started doing a lot of meditation. She also did an Instagram “clean”, where she unfollowed a lot of people she had been following that often made her feel she needed to change things about herself. She sought out accounts of women that were her size, and women that inspired her for no reason related to looks, and women she just found authentically beautiful. She’s Come So Far Looking back at how she quit dieting for good, Katy loves how far she’s come! She’s started taking guitar lessons, and also sewing. (Now, she makes her own clothes, and they don’t have a size on the label since they are custom made for her!) Journaling and mediation are also parts of her ongoing journey. Katy’s also learned that food doesn’t scare her anymore. She eats a wide variety of things, including little fun treats like cookie butter that she loves to keep in her pantry! Another change is being able to keep easy meals on hand, and she also knows the foods that give her constant energy throughout the day. She has a favorite ice cream that she keeps in the house — something she couldn’t imagine ever doing in the past! With a laugh, Katy said: “I never thought I’d be where I am right now.” When it comes to movement, she’s been looking for fun ways to feel strong and powerful. (Her gym is closed so weight lifting isn’t an option, even though she loves that.) She’s also been hiking, doing yoga, and listening to whatever her body wants and needs. Sometimes that even means doing nothing at all. Katy’s Final Advice If you’re going to try intuitive eating, find a community! Intuitive eating is amazing…but it’s also not easy. It takes time, but it’s definitely worth doing. Being free from diets and being able to enjoy her life (and body and food) is amazing! As far as self-care goes, Katy advises you to do your best to get enough sleep. She finds it’s hard to get strong signals from her body when she’s lacking sleep, which makes intuitive eating practices more difficult.

Today is the third and final episode about my intuitive eating journey! This one features my last three years of intuitive eating, and I’ll pick up from where I left off last week: right after I hired my own life coach! Parenting Comparison-itis & My Intuitive Eating Journey My coach helped me realize how much mom guilt I had been feeling as I entered into my journey as mom. The same sort of shame and guilt I had used to feel about eating….I was now feeling about parenting. From sleep schedules to nursing struggles, to what kind of stroller we had and whether I was finding a rhythm: there were so many things to compare. I found myself often noticing what everyone else was doing, and experiencing guilt and shame over what I felt I wasn’t doing “right” myself. I realized that, rather than comparing my body to other women’s bodies, I was comparing the way I was as a mom. As glad as I was that I had worked through a lot of food and body things as an intuitive eater, it quickly became apparent that there were other areas I was still struggling. The principles and tools I learned from intuitive eating helped me worked through a lot of the challenges I faced as a new mom. That’s what I love about intuitive eating! It’s a journey that starts with food….but it carries over into all parts of your life. Self-knowledge is so powerful, and responding to yourself from a place of love and compassion is such a good feeling. Between working with my coach and practicing my intuitive eating principles, I was able to increase my confidence and decrease the shame and guilt that parenting seemed to be stirring up. I’m so glad I had those tools at the ready. That experience really proved to me that intuitive eating principles weren’t just a luxury better enjoyed by my child-free (less sleep-deprived) self! They truly worked in every area of my life, even as I was evolving and changing. Intuitive Eating Principles & Business Building Speaking of evolving… I was also still starting my business during this time! There were so many insecurities and fears I found myself having to work through as an entrepreneur in the online world. For instance, going live on video was so awkward for me. (One of my clients even mentioned I had looked really uncomfortable during my first ever live. Aghh….the struggle was real!) But I also knew that the only way to get better and build my business was to stick with it and keep trying. Being willing to practice (even when I knew it was less than perfect) improved my confidence and ability. Now, so many things that used to be major stressors are easy and natural. Did I have to push myself? Yes! But I also know that getting comfortable with the uncomfortable is an important part of life (and growth). The confidence I gained through intuitive eating enabled me to have a strong foundation for getting out of my comfort zone! I already had so many tools for building my confidence, overcoming shame and guilt, and offering myself self-care and compassion (while also growing through uncomfortable changes). All I had to was apply them to my business. New Vision For My Family We were able to visit the US shortly after Cooper was born, and it was HARD! There is a 12 hour flight and a 9 hour time change from Zurich….and the effort it took to get an infant back into some semblance of regular sleep was extremely challenging. Our time back home with friends and family, however, was more than just a long flight and sleepless nights. It also ignited a new desire in my heart: to raise our kids close to family. Seeing Cooper held by his grandparents and enjoyed by his cousins, and having a chance to be surrounded by family in a place we had both grown up in….it made me realize that I wanted this for our future. If I could have gotten my whole family to move to Europe with me, I would have brought them all to Zurich! But that wasn’t an option. Choosing to come back to the US permanently was a huge (and really hard) decision. However, my intuitive eating journey had instilled so much confidence in myself, and in my ability to know my own desires and tap into my own intuition, that I was able to have peace in our decision. (You can listen in to how living in Switzerland changed my eating habits HERE, and read a short Instagram post on some ways in which food is thought about differently in Europe HERE.) Tapping Into My Passion Around this time, the yoga studio I taught for went through some changes. As a result, I had to make some decisions about what my priorities were. Ultimately, I chose not to continue teaching. I knew that my true passion was intuitive eating and coaching. Parenting was also bringing about new time constraints….and it ended up making sense to transition away from the studio. A few months later, I could feel the difference in my body. When I was teaching I was spending an hour or two doing yoga every day. And as much as I had loved that….it was no longer necessary to invest that amount of time doing yoga when I wasn’t teaching (and preparing for teaching). As I noticed the changes in my body, I evaluated how they made me feel. I could have chosen to go back to practicing more regularly, but at the time, I realized that working on my business and having more family time was what I desired. That came with changes to my physical body, but I was okay with that. Once again, intuitive eating gave me the tools to process who I was, what I desired, and what I wanted to have happening in my life. Being empowered to prioritize what I most wanted and needed was important to me, and I’m so glad I had those tools at the ready! I’m also glad I didn’t have to feel guilty about my body changing. Intuitive Eating Tools & Major International Moves Moving internationally is stressful! Jon’s job was in flux, and we had a lot of uncertainty. In addition, we were trying to get in lots of last minute travel and nights out with friends we would be leaving behind. During this time, I relied heavily on the ability to ask myself: What do I need today? Rather than getting into a binge/restrict cycle where I ate heavily for 6 weeks of chaos and then went on some kind of wild cleanse, I was able to tend to my body and her needs throughout the entire transition. Sometimes that meant eating out, and other times that meant enjoying something light at home. It never meant having to restrict myself, though, and I credit my intuitive eating tools with that! Even so, I still had to go through the process of having compassion for myself as I got into new rhythms after the move. From finding new workout and meditation classes to looking for a co-working space and finding new friends and connections — moving definitely takes a lot out of you! I truly needed to practice self-care, be gentle with myself, and stay in tune with what I needed on a day-to-day basis. (I also had to learn all about letting go of restrictions again as we transitioned to US culture!) Pregnancy #2 & Intuitive Eating I found out we were expecting on the first day of our Covid quarantine. I’ve already done a few episodes on the pregnancy, so we won’t go too deep on that here! (Pregnancy and intuitive eating actually have lots of similarities, which I talked about HERE.) Some of my biggest takeaways, as an intuitive eater: + Don’t stress about changing dietary needs. If you can only eat bread and pasta (that happened to me for a bit), then enjoy them! Eventually your taste for other foods will return. Listen to your body, and give her what she needs. (Read about my first trimester eating experience HERE.) + Get clothes that fit your body for whatever stage she is in. If you’re not feeling ready for maternity clothes quite yet, you can still size up in your favorite jeans. Wearing clothes that feel really good on your body is important, and there’s no need to force yourself into items that are too small, too tight, or too constricting! + The best thing you can do for yourself is to honor your needs and your body. If she tells you she needs something, do your best to provide it. You might have new hunger and thirst needs, new sleep-related needs, or all manner of other new changes. Check in with yourself often, and do what you can to take care of yourself! + You might still have difficult body image days. Intuitive eating doesn’t mean everything is easy and perfect all the time. It does, however, give you the tools to process what’s happening. My Intuitive Eating Journey Wrap-Up Intuitive eating about so much more than *just* food. It’s a progression of confidence, in both your body and your life. It’s a way of getting to know yourself, your desires, and your patterns. There is so much to learn about who you are, and intuitive eating is a way of honoring that process. You CAN feel good, find food freedom, and gain total confidence. I promise you that you can take care of yourself in a way that feels right for you; no shame or guilt attached! Intuitive eating is a process and a practice. It can push you out of your comfort zone, but in my experience….it never takes you anywhere that doesn’t ultimately serve your highest good. No diet could ever give you that! If you want to learn more, quit dieting, or get some support for your own journey — reach out! I’ve been there, and now I’m here for you. My clients get amazing results, and they report truly finding food freedom by the end our time together. They’re able to enjoy food, be more confident in themselves and their bodies, and consistency use tools that honor their ongoing needs. Intuitive eating works (whatever is happening in your life), and I’d love to see you grow your practice! Ready? Let’s go!

Welcome to Part 2 of my intuitive eating journey! We started with my dieting story, and last week I gave you Part 1 of my intuitive eating journey! I’m 7 years in, and I want you to know that intuitive eating can truly work with you in any and every stage of life. (I’ve lived internationally, had major moves, given birth to two children, and started a business….all while eating intuitively!) I’m all about taking care of myself from a place of love, and that’s what I teach my clients to do as well! If you want to get started, or could use a little refresher, go check out my free, on-demand training. You can ditch the food guilt and body shame and finally feel free around food! Ready? Grab your free training and get started today! Real Food First With my first program, I wanted women to know they can eat what they want and feel good. At the time, I was focused on whole foods that make you feel good. (Now, I no longer hold to the idea of “real” food. I’ve realized that sort of reframing isn’t really that helpful for women that have been dieters.) I was cooking a lot, eating a variety of foods, and sharing with others that they can enjoy food! I didn’t sell very many….which was probably a good thing. It was a great learning experience, and also helped me further shape my own vision for what my business would be. An opportunity to speak to a women’s group (where I shared my dieting story!) boosted my confidence in who I was and what I wanted to really do. That was a huge first step that really helped me grow as a person and leader. One of these days, I hope to be able to speak to in-person groups again…in the meantime, I love that the podcast gives me that opportunity every week! Intuitive Eating Learning Experiences 6 months into my educational program I was able to start taking on my own clients. My 1:1 practice grew fairly quickly, mostly by word of mouth and via Zurich connections. During this time, I continued taking good care of myself. (I used to think that dieting was a form of self-care!) Part of that was acupuncture treatments to help me alleviate stress and feel really good. My acupuncturist asked me to create meal plans for clients of hers that were dealing with hormonal imbalances. Something interesting that happened with those clients was that NONE of them finished the 3-week meal plan I crated for them. Why? It was too strict! Even though it was meant to be healing, the rigidity made it impossible for them to really follow through. Since then, I’ve learned a lot more about using intuitive eating principles, even when dealing with specific dietary needs. (For example, check out Julie Duffy-Dillon’s episode on PCOS, and Susie Garden’s interview on dealing with food intolerances!) My Intuitive Eating Journey & Pregnancy While we were traveling in Greece, I took a pregnancy test pre-scuba diving….and it was positive! (Needless to say, I didn’t go diving.) Intuitive eating was really helpful during pregnancy. I was really nauseous, so I was eating more bread than usual. I also had lots of other cravings, and even schedule changes (I HAD to eat within 5 minutes of getting up if I wanted to have a hope of avoiding throwing up). Rather than feeling guilty about what and how I was eating, I had the freedom to adapt as needed and honor my body’s needs. I also got to practice being curious about my body! I had major heartburn, so I got to consider how I could help myself feel the absolute best. Dairy (which often makes me feel not-so-great) worked better for me when I was pregnant, and my doctor helped me realize that my iron supplement was connected to my severe bloating. Our bodies are truly amazing, and pregnancy was a chance to really learn more about mine! Intuitive eating allowed me to let go of preconceived notions and pressure, and experience listening to my ever-changing needs. Quit Dieting for Good My Quit Dieting for Good program came into being in 2016. I worked with a business coach to build out the business side of things, and working with clients helped me see that THIS work is what I truly desired to do. I gave Real Food First one more go around….but I knew quickly that it was time to retire it for good. My intuitive eating journey has been a pivotal part of both my personal life and by business, which has been such a fun journey! Now, Quit Dieting for Good is almost at its 5 year anniversary! I’ve continued to grow and develop my programs and coaching, but the heart has stayed the same: a passion for body confidence and food freedom that is accessible to all women! Intuitive Eating & Post-Partum Bodies Being post-partum made me realize that I had more body image work to do! I had gained weight during pregnancy, and when I didn’t lose it all quickly after giving birth I was upset. After all, I had taught yoga the whole time, AND I had given birth early (Cooper was pre-mature). It seemed like things should have “snapped back”…and my intuitive eating journey involved diving deeply into everything that came along with those assumptions. I had to dive deep into body image, especially postpartum body image. I learned so much, and really appreciate that experience. It truly helped me grow as both a person and coach. (Jenn Green and I talk all about post-partum mindset on her amazing interview, and Brittany Woodard shares all about post-partum body confidence in her episode!) During this time, I purchased new pants that actually, really fit my post-partum body. (Good quality pants!) I also had an incident where I broke down crying pre-event because I went to get dressed and my clothes didn’t fit right! There are so many ups and downs (and hormones!) post-partum, and the self-care portion of my intuitive eating journey played a large role in my experience. Also, my second time around with the post-partum experience, I got a therapist in advance. I knew I was going to want the extra support, and I opted to arrange for that in advance (rather than waiting for things to get bad). My first time around was hard, and I wanted to give myself some extra love and support by taking care of my needs in advance. Getting Support in Every Area After realizing that motherhood had been a bit of a rough transition, I decided to invest in a life coach for new moms. She worked with women to help them shift their mindset around mothering, and it sounded like exactly what I needed. I missed my freedom, my hour and a half morning routine that was clearly not going to work with an infant, and the ability to sleep all night. Working with her, I learned more about setting boundaries, self-care, and building feel-good routines (even with children in the house). Reaching out for and then investing in support for a need I had was a big step in my personal journey! At the same time, I brought on a business coach to help with my business growth. Since my own program depends on women being willing to get professional help for needs in their lives, I think it’s important for me to do the same! Even though I could have tried to figure out motherhood while also growing my business on my own….getting support made the process so much better for me, my family, and my business! Investing in support is also a means of taking care of my whole self, which I love helping my own clients do as well! Next week I’ll talk more about ways I’ve continued to do that throughout my intuitive eating journey.

Last week I shared my own dieting story! This week, I want to share more about my intuitive eating journey. I especially want to share about the beginning phases; I’m spilling all the details! My intuitive eating journey spans two babies, an international move, starting a business and more. It has changed, grown, and come right along with me through it all. That’s one of the reasons I often remind people that intuitive eating is extremely sustainable! (Not always easy….but definitely sustainable.) Like any other self-discovery journey, there are good days and bad. Intuitive eating, however, remains the best way I’ve found to live my fullest life! Real quick: The Quit Dieting for Good program is open! I’ve been running it over 4 years now, and it’s changed the lives of so many participants. You’re invited to join us at any time. You can learn more HERE. This is for anyone — women who have already been on the journey solo, and women who are getting started! 2014: The Start of My Intuitive Eating Journey In May of that year, I was sick of dieting. My husband and I had a ton of upcoming travel plans, and I wanted to be able to do it all and enjoy it! That meant I had to be able to eat sustainably (not binge on vacation and come home and do yet another juice fast). After a bit of looking, I came across an intuitive eating course and gave it a shot. As a result, I started to see it was possible to enjoy food and love my body without restrictions. An early experience I remember was having dinner and dessert with a friend, and then meeting up with other friends for drinks. There was a dessert at the table, and I was offered some. If you know me at all, you know I LOVE dessert. Normally I would have been all about it….but because of intuitive eating I realized I legitimately didn’t want more dessert in that moment. I was satisfied with what I had already had, and I just wanted to enjoy champagne with my friends. So I passed….something I would have never done before my intuitive eating journey. I also noticed that when I went out with my husband to an Italian place, I ordered pasta and enjoyed half of it. Not because I felt like I “had” to restrict anything, but because I felt full and was done. The Daily Bread During this time, I also started to enjoy a local bakery that I had avoided my entire first year in Switzerland! They were literally called The Daily Bread (in French), and obviously their main trade was bread. During my dieting years I had thought of bread as “bad” and was used to not allowing myself to enjoy it. My intuitive eating journey helped me come to realize that I can absolutely enjoy bread in a way that feels good for me and my body. No rules necessary! Little changes like this opened my eyes to just how restricted and guilt ridden I had been for SO long! My intuitive eating journey also gave me newfound confidence in myself and my intuition. Once I started trusting myself around food, I realized I could trust myself in other areas as well. It felt so good! In fact, I started literally standing taller. (A man in my yoga teacher training commented on it because he noticed the change in me.) Even though nothing major had changed about me and my body, my confidence and energy did change….and it changed how I stood and moved through the world. Sensitivity & Eating Rules Part of intuitive eating is about eating foods that feel right for your body. I was eating to fuel myself, and losing the guilt and shame that had long been wrapped up in food choices. Around this time, a number of people I knew were taking food sensitivity tests. Since I wanted to give my body the best and nourish her well, it seemed like a good choice, so I took one too. Although I took it from the right place….it also messed with my mind a little bit! The test said I was highly sensitive to eggs, pineapple, oats, gluten, and dairy. Because of that, I started almost cutting them out completely. I was pretty hard core (something I had done before with Whole 30). It was hard! Shortly after, I went back to the US for a wedding, and got a lot of comments about my weight loss. I told them about intuitive eating and yoga teacher training….and also my food insensitivity testing. In retrospect, I was still pretty steeped in diet culture. I was really excited my weight loss, and I was also still weighing myself pretty often. My worth was still too tied to the number on the scale, and I was more impacted by “rules” and restrictions than I realized. Eventually, I started to experiment more with “sensitivities”. What I learned from my body was that many of those foods were just fine in my body. (I have a friend who is a dietitian who has also shed a lot of light for how inaccurate they are!) Following my intuition and listening to my body was more accurate than the tests. 2015: The Artist’s Way My early intuitive eating journey had a lot of connections to feeling good in my body. I was able to move, enjoy foods that tasted good, travel, and otherwise practice self-care. (Because of our international move I still wasn’t cleared for working, so I had lots of time for all that!) I also discovered The Artist’s Way (by Julia Cameron). It’s a 12 week program in the form of workbook and daily exercises, like Morning Pages. Every morning, first thing, you’re encouraged to write in order to bring out things you might not have been fully aware of. If you do it consistently, you really learn a lot about yourself! You’re also encouraged to do a weekly Artist’s Date. This could be anything enjoyable you wanted to do with yourself. It might be a walk in the park, a trip to a museum, or anything that might strike your fancy. (I did a whole episode on how to date yourself!) Learning to enjoy your company increases your self-confidence, which is amazing! I believe some of these practices gave me the self-awareness to know I wanted to be a health coach, and the confidence to pursue it. Getting Pleasure From Food With a few free days that fall, I was able to go to small hotel for a personal getaway. During that time, in addition to practicing tons of self-care, I was also reading French Women Don’t Get Fat. NOTE: Some of this is still a part of diet culture. However, it also focuses on learning how to get pleasure from food. One of the practices she suggested was sitting with your food with no other distractions. I LOVE that practice, and recommend my clients try it as well. (However, I do NOT recommend the “leek cleanse”!) I found myself getting more satisfaction from my food, and also being more aware of what it felt like when my body was full. My Morning Pages, self-care, and experiences of food as pleasure all led me towards the next part of my intuitive eating journey: becoming a health coach! I found the Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN), made some calls, asked my questions, and enrolled! While I loved the program, I would note that they also teach you about all the diets on the market. Although it was a holistic approach that focused on how unique each person is, it was still sometimes tempting to try to the various diets we learned about it. And of course, many of those diets focused on weight loss, which is almost always a topic of interest when discussing food plans and diets. In spite of some of the diet-focus, I did enjoy the program and all that I learned. (I’m also glad I continued my own intuitive eating education beyond that, however!) Real Food First My first coaching offer was a 4-week meal plan called Real Food First. However….in retrospect I realized that Real Food First was based on the end of my intuitive eating journey, not the beginning! I didn’t quite have the confidence to teach and share about the process, and meal plans felt a lot safer. Now, however, I love working with women on the process part of their own intuitive eating journeys. Although I’m glad that I took the chance to start something new, I’m also really glad that I pivoted into my true passion: intuitive eating! Stay tuned to learn more about that part of my intuitive eating journey has unfolded next week!

I’m re-airing my first ever Quit Dieting for Good episode today! This one is all about my dieting story. It’s a reminder I’ve been where you are; I dieted for 15 years! It is completely possible to begin intuitive eating at any time in your life, no matter how long you’ve been a dieter. I would love to help you apply intuitive eating principles to your life! Although I haven’t accepted one-on-one clients for awhile, I have a few openings now since I’m coming back from maternity leave. If you’ve been thinking about trying intuitive eating out, I’d love to connect with you and see if coaching might be the perfect next step. You can apply HERE. 7 Years of Intuitive Eating I started my own intuitive eating journey in May 2014! I love intuitive eating, and have no plans to do anything else. Since this episode about my dieting story aired (115 episodes ago!), I’ve continued to grow my practice. Here’s a quick update on that before we rewind all the way back to my dieting days. Something I especially appreciate about this way of living is that it can transition with you through any age and stage. I’ve lived in two countries, gone through two pregnancies and births, and started a business — and intuitive eating has been part of my life through it all! The way I eat has changed over the years, because my body and life have changed. Intuitive eating has been a source of freedom and joy as I’ve navigated other parts of my life (through the ups and the downs). I’ve also found I’m passionate about teaching others about intuitive eating because it WORKS. It’s sustainable, it feels good, and it allows you to practice daily self-care. It’s the honest truth: there’s no reason you have to stay stuck in the dieting trap (even though it’s January!). You get to build the life you want, and you don’t have to diet to do it. Instead, you can learn about body confidence, self-care, loving yourself, and being free. Intuitive eating has served me well these last seven years, and I can’t wait to see what comes next! A Few Updates Since Ep. #1! If this is our first time meeting, I’m Caitlin Ball! I’m married to an awesome guy, and we now have two adorable kids together. (If you’re a sucker for baby pics, you can see the newest little guy here.) At the time I first recorded this Cooper was just 19 months old, so our family has been growing! Also, since this episode Jon and I have moved back to the San Francisco area. As much I treasured our time in Switzerland, it’s wonderful to back near our friends and families. I have continued to work as a Health & Lifestyle Coach. In a nutshell, I help women learn to quit dieting and gain confidence in their bodies and selves. That includes 1-1 coaching, as well as a group coaching program called Quit Dieting for Good. My hobbies include yoga, baking, paint-by-numbers, and learning more about eco-friendly living. My favorite snack is chocolate – I don’t let a day go by without indulging! (Side note: the grocery store chocolate in Switzerland is better than any chocolate I’ve ever had in the US. It’s insane!) My Dieting Story I’ve always loved food! My grandpa used to tell this story that as a baby I would cry between bites of food because no one could feed me fast enough. Today, I still dream about food and love getting excited about my next meal. However….I also experienced a lot of discomfort in my body. I grew a lot faster than most other girls my age, which created an obvious size gap. In fact, in grade school pictures I was always placed next to the biggest guy in our class (who went on to become an NFL linebacker). On top of that, I was a little socially awkward. I was good at school, less so with the social stuff! By middle school, I started to think I was too chubby. Reading the magazines and seeing what others did inspired me to think I should start losing weight. My mom (who used to be a WW consultant) taught me how to count points. That summer, I lost 8 pounds. I was thrilled to show up for picture day with a new, slimmer face. The rush of confidence I felt about my weight loss felt so good. Starting the Yo-Yo Cycle Back at school, I gave up my dieting. I had slumber parties to go to, and pizza to enjoy! As you can probably guess…I gained back all the weight I had been so proud to lose. Even when I wasn’t officially dieting, calorie counting became a constant weight on my mind as well. Even when I was eating something I wanted to eat, I would feel tremendous guilt about eating things I knew I “shouldn’t” be eating. Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches became my passion…even though I had to eat 2-3 to be satisfied. Now, I realize that I was actually craving confidence. I had been uncomfortable in my body, and I wanted to be more social and confident like the girls I admired. In my mind, starting a new diet and losing weight was going to position me to look better and feel good about myself. Through high school my friends and I frequently dieted together. We’d restrict ourselves to look great for the next dance or school event….then binge on all our favorite foods as soon as it was over. We also started getting interested in boys…which led to my first boyfriend! Weight Loss & Approval Once I started hanging out with my boyfriend all the time, I was no longer using food to comfort and distract me. (I was having so much FUN!) Initially, that resulted in a lot of natural weight loss. My boyfriend’s mom owned a high fashion clothing store, and on a trip to LA once she had me try on some of the clothes. I was the smallest I had ever been….but I couldn’t fit into a lot of them. When we left, she said “Now you know what you need to work towards.” As I got more comfortable and settled into my new normal, however, I gradually put that weight back on. Unfortunately, his mom noticed, and she was not thrilled about it. She walked in on us eating ice cream once, squeezed my leg, and said “Caitlin! You’re going to get fat!” Once, in front of his whole family, his mom told his aunt not to pressure me to try a donut because I needed to lose weight. Agh! If you’ve had someone in your life offering you that sort of “advice” or feedback, I feel your pain! That sort of thing really gets into your head, and it doesn’t feel good. As I progressed through college, I went through cycles of partying, having tons of fun, and gaining weight….then going home for summer, dieting hard, and trying to return thinner than ever. In fact, I once got a terrible stomach bug over the summer and ended up thinking of it as “the jump start” my body needed because it resulted in me losing 7 pounds. Loss and Comfort Food Losing my mom to breast cancer was tremendously hard, and I turned quickly to food to deal with the pain. Between the eating and the partying, I gained any weight I might have lost, sending me back into the restricting/binging cycle typical of all diets. Looking back now, I can see that I was seeking comfort. At the time, however, it seemed like just eating. My first “break” from the dieting mentally came when I went abroad after college. I decided I wasn’t going to calorie count or restrict myself, and that I could eat whatever I wanted. This was kind of like the first step of intuitive eating, except I wasn’t doing any internal work alongside it! Pair that with the stressors of being in a new country, observing the anniversary of my mom’s death far away from my family, and general struggles feeling comfortable with who I was….and you have a recipe for eating as a form of comfort and relief. When my family visited me for Christmas, my brother was immediately concerned for me. Up-Leveling My Dieting Game I realized I hadn’t been taking care of myself very well, and I wanted to change. So…back to dieting! I started using My Fitness Pal and attending spin classes. Eating “healthy” became an obsession, and I was constantly pushing myself to eat “right”. (Although Sundays were all about enjoying and overindulging since I knew I would be back to restricting on Mondays. You’re probably familiar with that cycle!) I didn’t yet know how to stop counting calories and enjoy eating! I tried running (and ran my probably-only-ever half marathon), and got into the smoothie cleanse trend. My friends and I were all doing a lot of the same things; eating “good” food, working out, counting calories and following trends. And then… I started a baking blog! Even though I was giving away as much of it as I could, it was a struggle because the comfort of baking made me think of my mom. New Ways of Thinking About Food When I was dating my (now) husband, I remember thinking it was crazy he would quit eating with food on his plate. He’d have a few bites left and just…stop eating. When I questioned him he shrugged and said he just wasn’t hungry anymore. Having grown up in a family that insisted you don’t waste food and always cleaned your plate, that was crazy to me! (Plus, it just didn’t make sense with the dieting story I had believed for so long.) Now I realize that Jon was just already practicing intuitive eating principles; when he was full, he stopped eating. As I prepped for my wedding, I was working hard to lose weight. I tried a yoga retreat and working out 2 hours a day and all sorts of other things. Ultimately, I settled on doing Whole 30, which ended up being my last major diet! It also taught me that my body doesn’t really love dairy, which I discovered when I reintroduced it. Enjoying My Food & Eating for My Body Post-wedding, we headed back to Switzerland and I started yoga teacher training. I realized pretty quickly that I had to eat appropriately to have enough energy to get through the long days. I also realized that yoga training and dairy weren’t going to be a great fit for me, for reasons you can guess! It was the first time in my life I started eating for my body, which was crazy! Around that time, I also came across an intuitive eating class. It was perfect timing, and I dove in headfirst. I started eating food that felt good for my body. Vegetables and lighter foods became something that I chose because I wanted them. Sweets were something I could indulge in with joy and pleasure – no more guilt. Eating more food when I already felt full didn’t work for me anymore. Dieting no longer seemed like the key to feeling good in my body. My emotions were something I could talk about and journal through, rather than eat. Body acceptance became real and possible; not something other people were able to do that I could never attain. Practicing yoga became about doing yoga and feeling strong, rather than losing weight or changing my body. (Yay for intuitive movement!) My {Real} Dieting Story Dieting does NOT work. Intuitive eating is powerful because you get to incorporate everything: your body, mind, emotions, and full self. You get to practice self-care, love yourself without guilt or shame, and grow in confidence and acceptance of who you are. Now that I’ve experience this, I can say with confidence that my dieting story has come to an end. I’m free from that, and I’m here to say that you can gain that same freedom yourself!

Happy New Year! This is often the season for New Year’s resolutions…and all too often people start looking for fad diets as a result. I’m here to tell you you don’t have to do that! There are so many amazing things you can do for your body, your life, and your health that do NOT require dieting. Today, we’ll talk about five of them! Just a reminder, you can access my on-demand training, How to Ditch Food Guild and Body Shame to Gain Confidence and Feel Free, for FREE! This framework sets you up for New Year’s resolutions that will help you start enjoying food and feeling good in your body. It’s actionable and fun, and you can start now! (Also, if you’re looking for more support, I’ve re-opened my 1-1 coaching container and Quit Dieting for Good group program! You can check that out HERE, or apply now!) 5 Healthy New Year’s Resolutions Better Than Dieting Tip #1: Get The Support You Need This isn’t isolated to health coaching! I’m talking about kind of specialized support that might make your life easier, more enjoyable, more balanced, or less stressful. For myself, that includes a weekly session with my therapist. I specifically reached out to someone because I knew having a new baby + all that transitioning was going to be tough! Being proactive in seeking support was a really good decision for me. In the past I’ve had business and life coaches. Right now, I’m getting a lot of help from my mother-in-law with childcare. I also have friends and other family members I know I can call to vent, chat, or get support. Are there areas of your life you could use some support? That could mean a therapist, a trainer for support and accountability, asking family or friends for help with childcare and transportation, or anything else. Something else to think about: If you’re really struggling with the temptation to diet right now, you probably have something else (beyond just food!) that you could use some support with. Past trauma, body confidence, self-image, anxiety/stress – all of these (and more!) can equate to reasons you might be struggling with eating. Rather than start another diet to try and control your food intake….what if you worked with someone who could help you address the real problems instead? That sounds like a healthy resolution! Tip #2: Move How You WANT to Move In addition to diet talk, New Year’s resolutions lead to lots of conversations about working out and moving your body. That can be exciting…or sound really terrible, depending on what movement has been like for you in the past. Do I feel better when I move my body? YES! But I don’t do it to burn calories, lose weight, or “punish” myself for not looking a certain way. Instead, I find a form of movement I actually enjoy. Then, I choose to engage in that from a place of joy and celebration. I do movement that I like to do, and it makes such a difference in how it feels! Also, don’t forget to consider how movement makes you feel afterwards. There are some forms of movement that I don’t always love “starting”…but I feel amazing when I’m done. I’ll still do those, because it’s worth it (even if I have to push myself a little to get started). On the other side of that: there used to be a class I dreaded going to…and afterwards I was always sore, tried, and frustrated. That is NOT worth it to me! Now, more than ever, you can access all sorts of classes with people you might not have ever been able to learn from. Online fitness classes, including live opportunities with celebrities and pros, are super common as a result of Covid. You might find a new favorite exercise you would have never considered in the past, especially if you’re willing to reframe fitness. Let 2021 be the year you enjoy movement. Tip #3: Let Go of Old Food Stories & Restrictions I used to make food-based rules, like: “Monday I won’t eat any chocolate.” These little food stories (like not eating carbs, not eating after 7pm, avoiding sugar, or only being vegetarian) can really weigh us down. We constantly hear that some foods are “bad”, or that others are “good”, and we can get really wrapped up in those stories! (Then we use them to make rules and start restricting.) What if you just let those go, and you tried eating things that taste good and make you feel good? You might really really like a tasty treat that you have a “rule” about…and you’ll end up binging/overeating on something else instead of just enjoying what you actually desire. Trust yourself, and your body, to let go of restrictions and enjoy a variety of foods! Food is food. Young kids eat a variety of foods, with no stress, because they don’t have any rules or food stories yet. You can get back to that place too, and you certainly won’t get there with another diet! Tip #4: Do Different Enjoyable Things Daily This is a form of self-care! I firmly believe that one of the best forms of self-care is to do things that you love daily. For example, one of the best parts of my year in 2020 was working on my paint-by-number every day. It brought me SO much joy! I’d listen to music or podcasts (or just my own thoughts), and it was a personal “me time” hobby I loved. Doing something for yourself that you can enjoy is powerful — and it’s a really easy way to honor your self. Daily joys can include food, like treating yourself to a latte or your favorite baked good. It could also mean watching a show you love, calling your mom, taking a starlit walk around the block, visiting the pet store, painting your nails, or anything else that lights you up. Being happy helps you be healthy. Mental and emotional health are just as important as your physical body and its health — adding daily joys helps you tap into that! If all your current New Year’s resolutions are serious, I’d encourage you to mix it up with FUN! Tip #5: Work On Your Relationships & Connections A lack of relationships, or too much stress and conflict within your relationships, can really take a toll on your health. Even if it feels overwhelming, I’d encourage you to look for ways to build stronger relationships in 2021. This last year I’ve made it a priority to have a weekly phone date with a friend. I found that Zoom calls with big groups just didn’t work for me (I miss the side conversations too much!) Instead of just missing out, I made it my mission to connect 1-1 or in smaller groups online or via the phone. You might set up a phone date with your sister/mom/cousin/bestie, or set up a virtual coffee chat with a new connection from a local FB group. If you have a partner, you could also take inventory of how that relationship is going for you. Could you spend more time together? Are you encouraging and supporting one another? Are there conversations you need to have? Do what you can to make this important relationship a source of pleasure and health! No Food Restrictions Required in 2021 There is so much more to health than the way you’re eating! Rather than creating yet another new year’s resolutions based on the diet industry, what is one thing you can focus on that will improve your health and take the emphasis away from food? Choose one thing and start practicing! Once it’s going well, feel free to add in something else. (Don’t be tempted to do *all the things*….that’s a recipe for overwhelm!) If you’re done feeling guilty about food, shaming your body, and struggling with food….I’m here for you! Head HERE to apply to work with me; we’ll hop on a call and talk about what’s going on in your life, and how I can help.

The big question I’ll be discussing today is this: How do I practice body acceptance if I still really want to lose weight? It’s a great question because when you learn about intuitive eating, you read you are supposed to accept your body as it is right now. But what if you don’t feel good in your body right now? How can you accept that? And isn’t it easier to make change if you don’t just accept what is? These questions, and more, are common. So if you’ve been wondering about any of them, you’re not alone. Let’s talk about it! Also, just a reminder that you can access my free training on demand: How to Ditch the Guilt and Body Shame to Gain Confidence and Feel Free! If you’re already dreading a new round of dieting, body shame, and weight loss guilt…this is perfect for you! What Body Acceptance Really Means What can you do about your desire to lose weight while you’re also learning to eat intuitively? Does body acceptance mean you can never want to change anything about your body ever again? First off, I want you to know that accepting your body as it is right now does not mean that you are giving up on health. It’s also not about giving up on feeling better in your body! What body acceptance really means is that you are giving up the fixation or obsession you have with trying to change your weight. You accept your current weight as it is. You accept that this is where you are at right now. And from that acceptance, you start on a journey to learn how to feel the best you possibly can in your body and mind. Body acceptance lets you embark on that journey from a place and self care, rather than from a place of shame and guilt that pushes you to “punish” yourself for not being the way you think you should be. An Example of Acceptance Let’s use accounting as an example. Maybe you never learned it in school, but now you’re a business owner (or just an adult trying to get your budget together!), and you’re frustrated because you feel like you don’t “get it”. You want to be able to use accounting and understand your financials, but you’re clearly not fully equipped to do so. The best way to get started is to accept the fact that you don’t know what you need to do. Boom. No need to shame yourself for not knowing it all and being a pro. Instead, you just accept and understand that you don’t know it yet. You know you can find a way to learn, and being honest about your current lack is a good thing – it means you’re ready to get started! Once you’ve identified the problem, you might decide that you’d like to learn how to do accounting for your business and personal needs. You could sign up for an accounting course to learn the skills you need. It will take practice, but eventually, accounting will become second nature to you. Once that happens, you can do your own accounting! You never had to feel ashamed or guilty. There was no need to put yourself down or shame yourself for not knowing something. You could accept where you were, and still start the journey towards growth. The Acceptance of Your Body Weight Now let’s go back to your body weight, and the idea of accepting it as it is right now. First, you have to gain some knowledge and understanding of what your body does for you (it’s amazing!). You’ll also want to consider what might not be working the best, since every body is unique. Then, you get to take action. This action is a combination of accepting your weight for what it is and treating your body with love and kindness. This enables you to feel better in your body, as well as about your body. It also translates to positive outcomes physically, mentally, and emotionally. Nice! Key Points of Body Acceptance ONE: Your body has a set point in weight. Just like you have a shoe size, just like you have an eye color, you were born with a weight that works well for your body. If you are constantly trying to be under that weight, you will forever be eating less than your body wants and needs. Your set point has a range that it likes to stay within. Think about the oven. When you set the oven to 350 F, the temperature will fluctuate from 320-380 throughout the time that you are cooking. (Surprise! It doesn’t stay exactly at 350 the whole time, even though it’s filled with sensors and other tech.) When it hits 320, the heat turns back up again. When it hits 380, it stops adding heat to the oven so it can cool a bit. This is similar to your weight. If you are regularly eating an amount of food that your body needs and you’re moving your body, scientists predict that your weight will most likely fluctuate 10-20 pounds. (Why isn’t this ever talked about?!) This is a key point to understand so you can accept weight fluctuations as being a normal part of your body. Those weight fluctuations can be due to what you’ve eaten, water retention, menstruation, medications you may be on, and a whole slew of other reasons. What can you do? Throw out the scale and buy different size pants for different days, and just keep eating normally! TWO: Fat is not “bad” and thin is not “good” (or vice versa). Also, it’s important to understand that thin does not equal “happy”. Is every thin person happy? No! Unfortunately our society has put being thin on a pedestal. But even this has fluctuated over time! A while back, being fat proved your wealth, which was a good thing. Our expectations around weight have actually fluctuated and changed with every trend. Look around: thick eyebrows are in now, but thin eyebrows used to be popular. Permed hair was huge in the 80’s, and we’ve seen trends for straight hair, wavy hair, crimped hair, and everything else. Big butts are taking the place of big boobs, with a whole movement around removing breast implants. How the heck are you supposed to keep up with it all? The point is, you can’t (and you shouldn’t feel like you have to)! Our body shape and size is the same way. Whether you fit whatever trend happens to be “in” right now or not….you shouldn’t be forcing your body to attain an ideal it wasn’t meant for. Especially when that ideal is based on nothing more than a passing fad! You have to realize that your body wants to weigh what it wants to weigh – it has a natural set point. If you’re always trying to make it be something its not, you are going to forever be at war with your body. Learning to accept that your body has a certain size, just like you accept that you have a shoe size (and you buy shoes in that size) is key! THREE: Fat does not automatically equate to being “unhealthy”. A naturally thin person with unhealthy habits is definitely not as healthy as a naturally larger bodied person that has healthy habits. You literally cannot look at someone and know anything about the true state of their health just because you are observing their physical size. Our culture is so focused on this lie that fat = unhealthy. In reality, the shame that fat people feel for being fat is worse for their health than the fat itself. The healthiest decision you can make about fat is to stop shaming yourself, and stop shaming other people. FOUR: Body size does not define worth. The last thing I want to remind you, because I know you know this is true, is that your body size does not define your worth. When you move this knowledge past the surface level and really feel it, it can change so much about how you perceive yourself! You are worthy. No matter what you look like, how much you weigh, how much money you have, or how well you fit societies mold (or don’t) – you are worthy. So many of have a hard time with this one, because a part of ourselves is clinging to the idea that if we lost weight, or made more money, that we’d be more loved, seen, accepted, wanted, or worthy. It’s just not true. You are absolutely worthy just the way you are. Take a moment to think about all the wonderful inner traits you possess that are so uniquely you. The way your mind works, the things you love to do, the way you treat others, the passion you hold, the abilities you have. There is SOOO much more to you than your weight or body shape! Get to know yourself! Spend time with yourself. Ask yourself what you want to do on a regular basis. Ask yourself how you’d like to be treated. The more you can get to know, honor, and appreciate your true self, the easier it will be to treat yourself kindly and accept your body exactly as it is. Body Acceptance Actions to Take Today 1. Stop weighing yourself. You know now that this number means nothing, so why potentially trigger yourself with old thinking patterns by stepping on the scale? Just so you also know, you can usually refuse to be weighed at the doctors office (ask them why they need it), or turn around and not look at the scale if it’s a must. 2. Move your body in a way that feels joyful. You’ve probably worked out as a form of punishment to make your body look a certain way. Most of us have at some point! Once you stop punishing your body, you can start moving her just because she is a body that likes some sort of movement! Turn on your favorite podcast and go for a walk. Turn on your favorite songs and dance. Go exploring your neighborhood on foot. Walk to the lake and get an ice cream cone on the way! 3. Start feeding your body what it wants and needs. Allow yourself to have food that you desire. Feed your body food that provides nutrients and energy that will allow your body to function. Eat regularly and eat an amount that your body needs, depending on the day. I know this part is easier said than done, but it feels so good once it becomes a practice. 4. Stop making comments about your body or other people’s bodies. You may not even notice the little comments you are making. Things like: “Ugh, I’ve gained so much weight.” Or, “Wow did you see how big she is now?”, and even “Sorry, don’t mind me and my pimply face/” On and on it goes! You don’t have to apologize for your body; if someone else is offended by something, it’s their own problem. You also don’t need to compliment other people’s weight loss. Pointing it out might bedetrimental to them in a way you don’t realize, and you’re just adding more weight stigma to the world. Any comments about weight are just unnecessary. 5. Start living exactly as you would if you were in your dream body. If you’ve ever held back from dating, swimming, wearing a red dress, traveling the world, riding a roller coaster — if you held back from doing anything simply because you were waiting to be in the perfect body – go do it now! Find out if you are holding back, and if you are, go out and do the thing you’ve been withholding from yourself! But What About the Desire to Lose Weight? So what do you do with the desire to lose weight? You can’t just drop a desire that has been engrained in you for years! So yes, the desire to lose weight can still be in your mind, even as you begin to practice body acceptance. Let it be in your mind, but, as one of my clients said, “Put it on a shelf”. You have to power to take the desire and “shelve it”, rather than letting it sit front and center for you to think about every single day. When you put the desire to lose weight on a shelf, you allow yourself to focus on taking care of your whole self in a loving way, instead of punishing yourself to change. In place of that obsession about losing weight, find something else to add in. Maybe more fun! Add in more self-care! Add in more vegetables! Try some formerly restricted foods! Add in more movement! You CAN accept your body while still having the desire to lose weight. The only stipulation is that the desire to lose weight can no longer be top priority. It can’t be the “thing” that fuels you. After months or years of practicing body acceptance, the desire to lose weight will go away on its own. You won’t even have to force it out. Think of it like a friendship that would be very difficult to cut off completely (for example, someone you may still have to see in a group setting). Instead of a big dramatic break up, you could just slowly turn down offers to hang out, and slowly stop answering their calls and texts. Eventually, they’ll just stop trying to remain in contact at all (except for maybe a few times a year, at which point you are free to politely decline). The desire to lose weight might try to come back into your life, but once you know better, you can simply decline the invitation. Instead, you can rest in the knowledge that your body has found its happy weight. Once your inner self has finally found peace, you’ll realize weight loss never meant what you thought it meant (acceptance, belonging, peace, contentment, happiness, self-love) Are you ready to accept your body and stop prioritizing weight loss? I hope so! If you’re ready to take action now, you might head over to Episode #16 – 3 Tangible Ways to Love Your Body.

Jenn Green is a body acceptance movement and mindset coach for Mamas. That includes post-partum mindset! She helps us get strong while unlearning everything we’ve been taught about our bodies not being “good enough”. In our awesome interview, we discuss what you need to be doing post-birth (instead of trying to get your pre-baby body back). Hint: It’s all about self-love and personhood! Jenn also shares tips on how to build strength without focusing on losing weight. New to intuitive eating, or just want to work on increasing your own self-love? You can check out my FREE training here! It’s called: How to Ditch the Food Guilt + Body Shame to Gain Confidence and Feel Free. In it, I’ll walk you through four steps that will move you towards feeling like your best self again! No need for any crazy detoxes or restrictive diets….just plenty of self-love and self-care. Helping Mamas in a Body Positive Way Jenn shares that she works with mamas on both movement and mindset! She got her start with strength work, and for quite a while she fully focused on that. Over time, however, she found that mindset stuff was getting in the way. Her clients would express a desire to get back to feeling good physically…but they kept circling back to the number on the scale. No matter how much Jenn tried to de-prioritize weight, it was a clear and constant issue. A few years in, she realized mindset work had to be part of what she was doing in order to help women overcome the weight preoccupation and focus on self-love and movement. Having grown up as a dancer and worked as an actress, Jenn knows all about body pressure. She’d auditioned for roles that came with stipulations like “lose 15 pounds”, and she’d seen her body through the lens of dance expectations for as long as she could remember. Getting pregnant, however, changed everything. Amazing (But Not Always Fun) Body Changes What your body does during pregnancy is amazing. Also, if we’re being honest, it’s not that fun sometimes! (Even though lots of people love to talk about the miracle of life and how amazing women’s bodies are….it’s still okay to not love or enjoy everything that’s happening!) Pregnant women often get a lot of praise *while* they are pregnant…and immediate expectation to lose weight and “snap back” very quickly afterwards. It’s stressful and unfair! One minute you’re getting compliments on your glowing skin and luxurious hair, the next you’re getting major side eye because you’re not wearing pre-pregnancy jeans yet. Mamas get caught in the middle, and it just adds one more thing to the post-partum mindset mix. Agghhh! Jenn feels like the whole pregnancy experience gave her more insight into her body. It also left her feeling like some things about her body were foreign to her. She found that, post-pregnancy, she had to get to know her body once again. Most mamas are in the same boat! She notes that for many women, getting our “bodies back” can feel like tangible growth. This can feel really good when we are seeking some form of post-partum normalcy. After all, there are so many new challenges and experiences once you bring a baby home! It’s natural to want our bodies to quickly revert back to how we remember them being – it feels comfortable and safe in a world that is often stressful and chaotic. It’s often not the most helpful place to focus though. What if You Got Your Identity Back Instead? Jenn encourages women to focus on identity rather than body. During the act of caring for a child, we sometimes forget that we love to curl up with a book and tea. Or that we deeply enjoy yoga class. Or that we need a night out with the girls (or with our partners) to stay joyful! Moving our bodies still has a place in all this. But instead of doing it as punishment, or to force ourselves to quickly bounce back, we can do it from a place of love. Rather than obsessing over food and exercise in an attempt to make our bodies “look right”, what if we put some energy into being our fullest selves? There may be things we need to mourn and let go of, but there are also things that we may be able to add. What parts of yourself can you celebrate and encourage? What would it look like if you took your focus off your body, and placed it on your life? Hormonal Changes are Normal As women who are dealing with post-partum mindset, we’ve all gone through another major hormonal change: puberty. Jenn points out that we don’t sit around wishing for our 10-year-old body back. Why? Because we get that puberty means big changes, and there is no going back! It’s part of the experience of living. As we age and grow, we constantly shift and change. For some reason, something about pregnancy makes us think we need to rewind time and get “that” body back. But just like a 20 year old would seem strange in a 14 year old body that doesn’t reflect her individual growth and journey….you would seem strange in some fantasy, pre-pregnancy body that doesn’t reflect your journey to motherhood. Of course your body is different now. It’s supposed to be! You can still be strong in your body, achieve our goals, and live your fullest, best life! You can do that now, in your body. Jenn also notes that, post-partum, many women are using weight loss as a way to gain acceptance and love. We want to be seen as full people, and we often think if we “improve” our physical appearance we can achieve that more quickly! But honestly, the increased pressure we put on ourselves to look a certain way doesn’t serve us at all. I remember that after my first child, little things like going out to breakfast alone helped me feel like a full person again. I needed that! Losing weight or wearing my old jeans again wasn’t what my soul actually desired (even though it sometimes seemed like an easy fix) — and over-focusing on those things wouldn’t have done anything for me. Boundaries Are Gifts In a toxic relationship, you know you have to build boundaries to keep yourself sane. And NOT that your kids are toxic…but you CAN teach them, by example, what it looks like to set boundaries. If you need space, you can create that for yourself. If you can’t play with them because you need to take a walk or take a break or take a breath, you can do that! Jenn noted that she’ll tell her son, “I just need a break right now.” when she needs space. Now her son uses that line too! He’ll let her know that he needs a break from a conversation or situation, which is wonderful! He’s empowered by her empowerment — and they are both better off for it. A huge part of building a positive post-partum mindset is building your own identity! That doesn’t have to have anything to do with your body or weight. Instead, it can be all about engaging in the things you love, and maintaining a strong sense of self-hood. How awesome! Working On Strength (Without Focusing on Weight Loss) Regular post-partum mindset can be SO weight focused….and it can make it hard to engage in movement without getting wrapped up in weight loss. Jenn wants to make working out and strength building FUN! She aims to make mamas laugh as much as they sweat, and she engages in lots of dialogue and positive talk. She also does her best to minimize micro-aggression comments. Things like “burn off that cheesecake” or “get rid of those cottage cheese thighs” are not welcome. Working out can be about pleasure and self-enjoyment, and it’s much more enjoyable when you focus on the outcomes that matter to you! There’s no need to demonize food or punish yourself for not looking the way you want to. That doesn’t feel good! Jenn also offers a weekly group coaching call where women can process their post-partum mindset and ongoing thoughts. It’s a place to share what’s on their minds, and to connect with others who can support them with positive messages. Those conversations are so key! Working out can be a way of building your identity and self-concept. It can be FUN! (It should be fun!) Just like we tell our kids to go outside and play because it’s fun to run and move and express and be free….we can let ourselves move that way as well.

Lauren Redwine is an anti-diet coach who helps health conscious entrepreneurs heal their relationship with food. (Our interview is for anyone who wants to heal their food relationship; not just entrepreneurs!) Lauren shares how to look out for the “wellness diet” that can sneak up on us so fast. Even when we have good intentions, we can inadvertently turn “being healthy” into another form of dieting. If you’re ready to relax around food this holiday season and create more joyful new year resolutions, this is a great episode for you! I have a special Food Freedom Holiday Workshop that’s available on demand now! If you need some help having fun and enjoying the holidays, I’d encourage you to check it out. Learn how to take care of yourself, stop stressing about what other people might be thinking, and create an amazing holiday. No wellness diet needed! An Industry Fueling Perfectionism Ultimately, Lauren works with wellness entrepreneurs who want to heal their relationship with food and their bodies. She finds this particular industry holds a lot of perfectionism, and there are constantly messages being sent about what’s “good”, what’s “bad”, and what you can and can’t do. The pressure to look perfect, play a role, and run a business can really feed into distorted body image and food relationships. This is something Lauren knows from first hand experience, as it’s where she got her own start in business. As an adult, Lauren realized she’s dealt with emotional eating since she was a child. During her higher education, however, she realized just how disordered her body image and eating were. For so long, the wellness rhetoric had made her believe that something was wrong with her….instead of being wrong with the industry. When she stepped away from wellness as a field, she realized she didn’t deal with binging and restricting nearly as much. But when she came back into the industry after a few years away…..she started having problems again. The big question on her mind? How come every time she got involved in the “health and wellness” space….she started to have so many more body image and eating problems? Shouldn’t it be the other way around? Always Obsessed Lauren realized that her own wellbeing decreased when she was knee deep in the wellness industry. Her final straw was an elimination diet she wen through, after which she hit her breaking point with business-as-usual. She knew there had to be something different out there. As soon as she found intuitive eating and the health at every size movement (HAES), it clicked with her. All the focus on her appearance and body hadn’t served her at all; in fact, it had been making things worse. And all those wellness diets hadn’t been working either! Now, Lauren is able to listen to her body. She eats foods that she loves, and trusts herself to know what will be best. I noted that many women will say that they DON’T diet….they just like to “eat healthy”. They make all of their choices based on wellness diets and “rules” about what it means to be a healthy person. Lauren shares this is often connected to a lot of fear mongering that goes on in the industry. There is so much pressure to be in a certain school of thought: vegan, Paleo, Keto, Whole 30. This list goes on and on, and most people in the wellness space are very aware of what “camp” they are in, and what rules apply. Even though wellness is supposed to be holistic (mental, emotional, physical, spiritual health), what we tend to see most of the time is very focused on body image and weight loss. It promotes the message that weight is everything: that weight = health. The Trap of the Wellness Diet Even if no one would actually say that weight is the paramount factor in health, it very much is the message being sent. “Clean” diets and wellness diets are also still very focused on weight loss and body image as well. Within the industry, Lauren notes there is often a lot of pressure to get aligned with some sort of wellness diet. There is an attitude that if *have* to be low carb, or vegan, or {today’s trend} in order to be doing it right. And if you aren’t doing it right, you’re doing it wrong. In addition, there is very much an “image” that goes with the wellness field. Thin women with the income for daily pilates, personal chefs, constant supplies of fresh green juice: there are so many ways in which the picture being painted isn’t accessible or realistic for the average person! People find themselves not knowing what to eat, or how to eat. They also feel guilty about everything they are doing wrong. There is so much pressure to get it right, and it’s stressful and confusing to know what to do. Lauren reminds us that are so many ways we can move for free; we don’t need special outfits and expensive memberships to enjoy moving our bodies! We can also make an effort to follow more diverse voices and bodies within the wellness space. There are so many different ways to *do* wellness, and we have the ability to choose what we want to prioritize and focus on. Wellness diets and body image don’t have to be centered in our narrative! Give Yourself a Break This is collective hard time. This is the time to focus on mental and emotional health first. There’s no need to pressure yourself into losing weight during quarantine, or coming out of this slimmer or fitter. Wellness is holistic. It encompasses your entire life, and it is not about what you weigh. At my last prenatal appointment I asked my doctor about postnatal mental health practitioners in my areas. Why? Because we may not have child care, we’re working from home, family may not be able to visit….and I’m not worried about getting back to yoga and fitting into my pre-pregnancy pants! For me, I know the most important form of wellness I’m going to need to protect is my mental health. For that reason, I’m being proactive about that! (And when yoga feels good again, and I’ll fit that in too.) It’s all about listening to your own body and needs. Be Present and Enjoy It Lauren notes that the holiday season can bring up a lot of stress and anxiety around eating and food. She also shares she’s been in that place where she was so worried about what would be served that she brought ingredients and made her own food, rather than eating the holiday meal that was prepared. That involved so much extra stress and worry. In retrospect, it would have been so much better to just eat was there and enjoy being present. Worrying about every bite you’re going to eat, or ways in which to avoid eating “bad” food, robs so much joy from your life. It also makes you feel deprived and even ostracized. Your attention span and willpower are so engaged with what you “can” eat (and what you “can’t” eat) that you don’t get to be fully there with the people you love. It’s okay to just go. Have fun. Engage with who is present, and eat what your body will enjoy. Ringing In the New Year (No Wellness Diet Needed!) If you’re moving away from diets and the dieting mentally, January doesn’t have to mean you’re focusing on some new wellness diet or way of eating. What a beautiful time to focus on a goal that will be more nourishing and exciting for your overall wellness! Lauren suggests choosing a resolution that is nourishing and additive, rather than restrictive and based on deprivation. (What you WILL do, instead of what you WON’T do!) This is also great because it’s easier to add something new to your life than to remove something. It’s also more fun! There are so many things in our days (and lives) that we already don’t want to do. (Here’s looking at you, dishes!) Why not let your goals be a source of joy and inspiration this year? Pursuing your dreams, engaging with your favorite hobbies, or trying new things are such worthwhile endeavors. Give it a try! (And if you do, I’d love to hear about it! Tag me in a social post or send me a DM and tell me all about it.)

Ingrid Helander, LFMT, helps chronic worriers resolve their self-criticism & doubts so they can live a life without chronic anxiety, worry & stress. As an author, speaker, therapist, and coach, she helps people embrace all of their being in order to live their fullest life possible. I see so many clients who experience worry about what others think about their bodies, their weight, their food choices, and more. It’s so common! If you’ve been feeling a need to let go of worry — join Ingrid and I for today’s powerful episode! Are you worried about the holidays? From what you’ll eat, to what others might say about your body or your choices, there can be a lot of things that create stress this time of year! My Food Freedom Holiday Workshop is designed to help you DECREASE stress and anxiety and fully enjoy the holidays! And since it’s a recording, you’ll get the workshop as soon as you sign up — no need to wait! Counseling & Coaching As a trained marriage and family therapist, Ingrid has worked with people of all ages. Recently, she’s been expanding her online coaching business, like so many others! That’s also involved moving away from the therapeutic model and more fully into the coaching field. She’s working at creating a culture and group around unlocking your own way of being with yourself. This includes the ability to release worry as well, which is so important for our wellbeing. Ingrid notes that eating and food is very central to who we are, and she finds that it comes up in her work quite often as well. We receive so many messages that tell us we shouldn’t be who we really are, and those apply to what and how we eat as well. Growing up, Ingrid was highly attuned to the idea that you certainly didn’t want to be fat. She watched her own mother diet, including with a program that insisted you must eat liver weekly. Her own thoughts about food and body image were all tangled up in social messaging about what was “right” and “healthy”. She did a lot of restricting as a result, and also connects her food experiences with anxiety and worry. Baking to Cope There was a period in time where Ingrid found baking was a way of coping with stress and anxiety. She would find new recipes, and at her peak may have been baking a cake a day….but she would never allow herself to eat any of them. She loved food, and yet was terrified of it at the same time. When she went off to college, Ingrid started her undergrad work in nutrition (listen in to hear what she changed her major to her senior year)! Rather than gain the Freshman 15, she ended up losing 15 pounds. Primarily, she was living off the salad bar and cottage cheese. The obsession gradually shifted; although she can’t exactly put her on finger on it, she thinks her mental health training, yoga teacher training, and menopause experience all played a roll. As she’s gotten older, Ingrid has come to see it as a shame that we don’t communicate more to our young people about how good and right their bodies are. Our bodies know. They know how to breathe and sleep and nourish us, and they are capable of so much. We ought to be embracing them and celebrating them – there is so much to love! Trusting Our Bodies One bit idea that made a difference in Ingrid’s life was this: I want to trust this body. She realized that she was living her life in a way that caused her to fight against and distrust her own body, and she no longer wanted that to be the norm. Part of that was recognizing thought patterns like: “If I let go of that control for even a moment….I’ll lose control!” and “I can’t trust my body, and I can’t trust myself around food.” In her work, she’s found that the body heals itself so much better when we trust it. When we love our bodies, feed our bodies, and listen to what our bodies are telling us, we’re in a real relationship with them. As a teenager, she realized that her body probably felt it couldn’t trust her at all. She didn’t listen to it; she didn’t feed it when it asked for food, and she disregarded it’s needs. Why should her body have trusted her? Now, she leans in to trust and let’s go of worry, restriction, and guilt that tempt her to disregard her own needs and desires. Chronic Worriers What will people think if our bodies aren’t perfect? If we gain weight? If we quit dieting? These types of questions create constant worry in so many women’s lives. Ingrid notes that we all have personalities, and different parts of our personalities tend to run the show, carry burdens, or get the highlights. If you’re seeking out a lot of other people’s opinions (about your body, eating, etc), it’s likely self-protective. Receiving approval and validation may be a way of “proving” you are loved, worthy, or accepted. And not receiving that approval can be a painful message that leads us to believe we are NOT those things. The chronic worry we carry, then, isn’t necessarily about someone approving what we’re eating; it might hold a much deeper meaning about whether we can be loved or wanted. Part of Ingrid’s work is to help women move to that deeper level. How? Well, she does that partly by helping people more fully enter their bodies. This allows them to begin peeling off the protective layers and learning more about their true selves. Although protection can be a good thing, if we’re primarily carrying around heavy protective layers all the time they can become a burden. So much of our eating and dieting journeys are connected to these deeper desires to feel accepted, worthy, and loved. Rather than forcing yourself to diet the rest of your life, you can take a different approach to healing and trusting your body. Taking On Wounds Ingrid shared a terrible story about another girl’s comments in the shower after gym. Although it happened years ago, she remembers it vividly. And at the time, she also remembers that a part of her thought the other girl was ridiculous…and a part of her thought she was right. There is so much pressure to look “right”, and to be perceived as having a “good” body. It overwhelms us! It also creates the message that “I have to buy in to the story I’m being told, or I’m in trouble.” When we see others being shamed, ridiculed, judged, or rejected for not fitting a certain mold, the message is reinforced even more deeply. Even when we want to push back and choose to love and accept ourselves, it can be hard! After all, we want to be loved. Ingrid notes that the pressure is great to look like some external version of “beautiful”. All too often, the people who are the most cruel about reinforcing those standards are the people who are most wounded and locked up in those areas. As people learn more about themselves and begin to heal, they are often able to begin releasing these painful mindsets and judgments, which have impacted not only themselves, but others as well. (Ingrid shares some amazing thoughts on how the sympathetic nervous system and our flight/fright/freeze instincts can kick in when we receive cues about our bodies!) With, Not In Ingrid recommends finding ways to be with strong sensations. This is not the same as being “in” the sensation! By finding ways to return to and observe our body and sensations, we can engage with them safely. You might try visualizing, journaling, and even drawing as part of being with sensation. How did it feel? What did you body do? Where did you feel tension or pain? What internal voices were speaking up? What were they saying? Allow yourself to be with sensations, and see what you learn about yourself! There is really so much happening, and going into the deeper sensations is such a powerful way of beginning to gain clarity in your own life. Most of us weren’t raised to pay attention to what is going on inside of us, and as a result we can be very lost by the time we’re adults. We don’t know how to trust ourselves, and we’re completely detached from our full selves. We don’t have to stay that way! There is an invitation for each of us to choose to engage our bodies and our selves today. We can learn to trust ourselves, no matter where we are now. This episode was so powerful. I hope you listen in, as Ingrid had some wonderful things to share! Also, here are the two books we mentioned on the show: The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron The Body is Not an Apology, by Sonya Renee Taylor

First off, Happy Thanksgiving! I am personally so excited to watch the Macy’s Day Parade, especially since it wasn’t aired in Switzerland when we lived there. You can imagine me all cuddled up on the couch, along with my boys. (It’s a pre-recorded event this year due to Covid, but I’m still excited to watch!) And since it’s the holiday season again, I thought it might be the perfect time to talk about how to reduce bloating with intuitive eating! If you’ve had a tendency to spend previous Thanksgivings feeling super stuffed, gross, or overfilled, this is a great episode for you! Intuitive Eating Over the Holidays You’ve seen jokes about Thanksgiving-based overeating on all the American sitcoms. (You’ve possibly even experienced the discomfort yourself!) And maybe you’ve strategically worn your best stretchy pants to the meal, or fallen asleep shortly after dinner… Holidays can be tricky, especially if you’re new to intuitive eating! If you’ve been practicing intuitive eating for a while now, you probably struggle less with holiday overeating than before. (I know I do!) I love leftovers, and enjoying a delicious slice of pumpkin pie for breakfast the next day is way better (to me!) then eating an uncomfortable amount of dinner and pie all in one sitting. But – breakfast wasn’t always something I allowed myself, which meant I “had” to eat as much as possible the day of any holiday. And that’s can be a real temptation when you have a strong dieting mentality you’re still working through! Since overeating can be a major contributor to bloat, you could potentially be pretty bloated tomorrow if you give in to the holiday binge today! Honestly, no matter what stage you’re in, you could potentially be bloated any day of the week. Over the holidays you may be consuming more unusual foods and drinks, and at different times. In addition, most women experience bloat at various times of the month naturally. So let’s talk about bloat! Reduce Bloating with Intuitive Eating A restrictive diet would give you a list of foods you “should” eat, and those to “avoid”. These rules will tell you that if you do this magical thing, it will make it all better. Basically, do everything right, don’t mess up, and you won’t get bloated. But our bodies are complex, and there is so much more to consider on this topic! (And of course all the “health” companies are going to start pushing commercials that will tell you to do a juice cleanse to detox from the holidays – you don’t need that!) Your body can naturally detox on its own – that’s what the liver and kidneys are for! (Claire Chewning and I talk more about on last year’s holiday themed intuitive eating interview!) So let’s get this straight: there is more to bloating (and reducing bloating) than controlling the food we eat/don’t eat. Here are a few practical things to consider! Reframe Your “Bloat” Mindset The first part thing we’re going to address is the mindset you need to have when you are bloated. Often, bloating sets off our inner critic – she’s immediately telling you you’ve done everything wrong, asking why you let yourself eat so much, blaming you for not having the willpower to just say no to the dessert… And on and on and on. (It’s your inner mean girl!) When this starts to happen, just remind yourself that bloating is a natural part of life. It literally happens to EVERYONE. Just because you are bloated today does not mean that you are a bad person, or that you did anything wrong. This is a chance to listen to your body’s signals, rather than shaming or blaming her. Now that we’re listening (without judging!), we can get practical. What can we do about being bloated in a loving, non-restrictive way? How can we reduce discomfort from bloating with intuitive eating principles? Tip #1 The first practical thing I want you to do when you’re bloated is to wear clothes that are comfortable. Nothing is worse than being bloated while wearing pants that are too tight. Plus, a tight waistband puts even more pressure on your digestive system, which is already working hard! I suggest you either have a pair of pants in a size up, especially for bloated days (every woman should have these already for that time of the month)!, or have some stretchy pants on hand. Another fun option? A flowing dress! Note: These can be CUTE clothes! They should be things you love to wear, and will be excited to wear! Having clothes that comfortably accommodate your body is not a “punishment” for getting bloated. (Judith Gaton and I take this concept even further in our episode about fashion for every body.) One of my clients bought a pair of pants that she absolutely loves in a size up. When’s she’s bloated, now she has something to look forward to wearing that she can’t wear otherwise! How cool is that?  Tip #2 Next, ask yourself” “What food and drink sounds good right now and would allow me to feel the way I want to feel?” The WANT in this question is key. If you aren’t feeling great in your body, it’s easy to turn to foods that will keep you feeling that way. But reminding yourself that you have a choice to feel better can help you make a different decision. Maybe that means a smoothie instead of a pastry, or eating breakfast a little later because you are still feeling full. (But not skipping it! You still need to eat!). Maybe that means oatmeal instead of cereal because the extra fiber might help your digestion. Maybe it means eating some protein, like eggs, will feel the best right now. Or maybe it’s increasing your water intake to flush out some of the salt you ate, or to rehydrate you after drinking too much alcohol. It might mean drinking a little extra coffee because that helps your digestive system! Or adding more veggies and protein into the day if you ate more carb-heavy yesterday. I don’t know what helps you feel better. Only you can know that, and it comes from listening to your body! I’m not going to tell you what to eat, but I would encourage you to take the time to ask your body what would make you feel good. Tip #3 Next, think about movement. Is there a type of movement you could do at some point today that would help you feel better in your body? (Again, this is not about “punishment”! This is about loving your body and reducing bloat with intuitive eating principles.) If you’re feeling really sluggish, maybe a walk or some light stretching would be best. If you feel like a good sweat would help, maybe try a higher intensity workout (that you would enjoy). And if you feel like you are bloated due to slowed digestion, maybe some twisting yoga postures might be helpful to you. The movement you do should NOT be punishment for feeling bloated! Remind yourself that your body loves to move, and you should respect that wish.  Tip #4 Next I want you to think about your stress level. Bloating is so often caused by stress…but everyone wants to blame it on the food! Is there anything causing you extra stress or anxiety at the moment? If so, what can you do to help ease that? Bring out those self-care tools – journaling, meditation, breathing exercises, talking to someone. All these things can help ease your body and mind, which can help release whatever it is you are holding onto. (You can find TONS of self-care tips from my first 100 episodes in the self-care celebration episode!) Tip #5 Think about your sleep habits in the last week or two. Have you had enough shut eye lately? Could it be that you simply need to go to bed super early tonight? Is there a way to fit in a long nap and restore your body? Allow yourself to do that if your body and mind need it! (And don’t be afraid to ask for help if you have kids. As this airs, I’m home with a toddler and an infant. I’m guessing I’ll know all about lack of sleep! Even though I’m not in the ideal time of life for naps and restful nights….I’m going to do my best to get sleep when I can. No guilt here!) When you sleep, your body releases hormones that help it repair and restore. And when you don’t sleep enough, your body and mood (and digestive system) really start to feel the impact! Tip #6 Finally, do you have some favorite supplements that might help you through the bloat? Maybe a probiotic or a fiber supplement? Possibly some ginger or peppermint tea? I love to try tea first; I enjoy drinking it anyways, AND it’s extra hydrating. Two wins, and no downside! Reflect on Your Body’s Signals Throughout the day, keep checking in with yourself. See how you’re feeling, and try to take note of which things seemed to really help. That way you can start there next time as you work to reduce bloating with intuitive eating. If I wake up bloated, the things that help me are to first throw on comfy and cute clothes. Then I’m intentional about adding more water to my day, plus more protein and veggies. (Because those things make me feel good!) I also go out of my to schedule in time for whatever kind of movement I’m in the mood for, as well as some extra self-care, like journaling or meditation. At the end the day, I like to wind down with herbal tea. Usually a day like that will reduce my bloating immediately (and gently). No juice cleansing or fasting required!!! And a note for my intuitive eating newbies: You might experience more bloating than you usually do when you first start intuitive eating. Usually this happens while your body is getting used to you eating a wider variety of foods. Don’t get discouraged, it will get better! (Or if it doesn’t, really try to take notice of which foods might be causing the bloat so you can reduce them out of love for your body).  For anyone with extreme or continued bloating, please reach out to your doctor or a registered dietician. There might be something bigger going on, and they will be the best people to help you! And for those of you that just get bloated every once in a while and want to feel better quicker, try these tips out and see how it goes! I hope you can reduce bloating with intuitive eating! Have a happy Thanksgiving, and I’ll be back next week with a special guest! PS – Thanksgiving is a holiday about gratitude! Last year I went in-depth on some of my favorite gratitude practices. You can check that episode out here!

I’m so exited to share this week’s interview with Steph Gadreau! Steph is a mindful eating mentor who helps purpose-driven women develop body trust. (You can check out her podcast, Listen to Your Body, which I recently did an interview for as well!) She’s on a mission to help women stop obsession over macros and thigh gaps; there are so many other amazing things to invest our energy and time into! In this episode, Steph shares about how moving from Paleo to intuitive eating impacted her personal life AND her business. (And remember to hit subscribe if you haven’t yet! We have some amazing interviews coming up after this one!) How Steph Got Started Steph’s been working for herself for about 7 years. Before that, she was a high-school science teacher! She transitioned into the entrepreneurial world with her blog (which had been a hobby), and has since grown her own business, which includes coaching, a podcast, and more. In the beginning of her coaching career, Steph got started by teaching Paleo. In her own life, this was actually a helpful stepping stone away from calorie counting. Eventually, however, she realized that she was still in the dieting mindset, and found herself learning more about intuitive eating! If you’ve done Whole 30 or Keto, you might have had (or currently are having) a similar experience! Now, Steph is fully invested in intuitive eating and personal food freedom, and those are core components of her coaching work! Looking back, Steph remembers being teased at school for being a chubby kid. She always had a bigger body than her classmates, and she also entered puberty really early. (At age 10, she got her period.) After experiencing a ton of sickness that was keeping her out of school and making her miserable, her mom took her to the doctor. The report? She was “fine” and would grow out of it. Being told that what she was experiencing “wasn’t that bad” was really hard, and set the stage for Steph to distrust her body and its signals. After all, when she had thought that something was really wrong and been really sick, an authority figure was telling her that there wasn’t actually a problem. Those sorts of The Dieting Trap Steph spiraled into a dieting trap, doing all the plans and calorie counting. She had a pervasive sense that something was wrong with her body, and constantly felt she needed to be thinner or smaller. Eventually she got into endurance sports. They served as the perfect way to hide the level of intense exercise she was undertaking, in addition to the reality that she wasn’t eating enough to fuel her body. In her mind, Steph had a number that was going to change everything. She believed that when she weighed “that number”, things were going to be different. One day she stepped on the scale and saw her magic number…and nothing changed. All that pressure and work, and in the end decreasing her body size didn’t change her life or her problems. With her marriage on the rocks and her body exhausted, she knew she needed to do something different. Enter, Paleo. At first, Paleo was amazing. (And at the time, it was a stepping stone that helped her ease back from the intense calorie counting and low fat fixations she was used to.) Years later, however, Steph started to realize that a lot of her disordered eating, built on years of dieting, came into Paleo with her. Although she was feeling better and experiencing more energy, as well as focusing on enjoying physical activity rather than weighing a certain number, there was still a dieting mindset that impacted her life and way of being. From Paleo to Intuitive Eating When her passion took her into the field of nutrition, Steph discovered bio-diversity. This opened the gates to becoming an intuitive eater, and resulted in becoming a trained intuitive eating coach. She was finally able to release her restrictions and hang ups around food like bread, which she hand’t allowed herself for so long. Moving into intuitive eating also helped her start to deal with other aspects of her life that weren’t serving her. Judging herself all of the time for not being “perfect” or “enough” was a thread that ran through Steph’s whole life. She found she had to do a lot of inner work and exploration to really start to sort through all of those ways of thinking. Intuitive eating encouraged her to be kinder to her body, and also to her whole self. Learning that she could listen to herself, and trust herself, was life changing. She also realized that her own internal judgmental narrative was something that was fueled by a dieting mentality, and that the way we eat can exacerbate other things about ourselves. Now, she sees that food is only one small slice of the equation when we are considering someone’s allover health and wellbeing. Outside the Paleo Guidelines We all have a personal framework we’ve developed for understanding food and our relationship to it. The food we eat might be about our budget, our regional location, our lifestyle, our family, and our religions. Want to move from Paleo to intuitive eating? (Or from any other diet or plan.) You don’t have to throw everything out the window to become an intuitive eater! Instead, Steph encourages you to think about: what happens when you break your own rules? For instance, if you currently follow the Paleo way of eating, what happens if you “slip up”? If you were to eat differently for a meal, or a day, or a week, would you go into a negative emotional space? Do you go into a spiral of blame and shame if you slip up, or “fall off the wagon”? Leaning into the way you would react if you were to NOT follow a way of eating can help you understand what sort of emotion connection (and baggage) might be attached to that way of eating. So if you happen to enjoy eating Paleo or Keto-styled meals, great! But be honest with yourself if guilt and shame are playing a part in that choice. When we berate ourselves for “failing”, or try to restrict even more to “fix” a mistake, that’s a sign that you’re in an unhealthy dieting mindset. Our Bodies Can Be Trusted If you’ve used a calorie counting app, you know you put in your details, and the app tells you many calories you get to eat. That might mean you eat more than feels comfortable, or it might mean you’re so hungry at the end of the day that you would eat a shoe! (I remember using dieting apps and eating extra calories just because they were “available”….even when I wasn’t even hungry!) If you’re used to following plans or using dieting to tell you what you get to eat (or not eat), your basically learning to tune out your body so you can follow a plan. That’s often signals a problem in your mindset! When we rely too heavily on external rules, we can lose the ability to listen to ourselves and our bodies. Intuitive eating is a reminder that our bodies can be trusted. They do tell us what we need, and we can listen to what they’re telling us. Steph shares that learning to listen to her body was a process, and she had to make peace with some of her old ways of thinking. For her, that included moving from Paleo to intuitive eating one step at a time. She opened up to learning more about her body and its needs, and she learned to balance that with the physical activities that mattered to her. To hear more about how Steph stepped away from overanalyzing eating choices, stopped making food “moral”, and began to enjoy food with her family again, listen in to the full episode!

Kaitlyn Lyons is the owner of Delightful Movement Coaching, and she helps work-accomplished women attend to the non-work areas of their lives. If you’ve needed some extra joy in your life, this is for you! Kaitlyn helps women create more fun, enjoyment, and wellbeing…things that we sometimes lose in our daily lives. Prioritizing play is a powerful way to get back in touch with the things that truly matter. Powered By Play As an executive wellbeing coach, Kaitlyn helps work-focused women figure out what lights them up. This leads to greater enjoyment of life! Kaitlyn’s 6 week group coaching program, Powered By Play, is a chance to get re-energized and bring FUN back into your life! 3 years ago, she was sitting in a cubicle as a project manager. Her job was highly visible, and she was working crazy hours to keep up with all of the challenges. Eventually, she burned out. She was waking up filled with dread, and going through the motions. Instead of being the zesty, joyful person she remembered herself being….she just felt tired. At rock bottom, play seemed like an enemy. Kaitlyn had built a successful career of working hard and depriving herself of play and fun. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do?! By chance, she happened to stumble across a TED Talk on play that opened her eyes to the reality that there was real science out there supporting the idea that we NEED fun in our lives. This resulted in a 180 pivot. Kaitlyn started looking for how to create engagement and joy in her life. Despite holding the intention for fun….she couldn’t make it happen. Fun turned out to be…..a failure! Prioritizing Play for 30 Days After more research and more studying, she settled on a 30 day play plan she created herself. For 30 straight days, she committed to PLAYING, and she did! Ultimately, it changed her life. I shared that, as adults, I think it’s so easy to get sucked into following the rules and doing what we think we have to do to be successful. If you’re not having fun or enjoying yourself, however, I have to wonder what the point is! Kaitlyn noted that one of her early “AHA” moments was that she saw play as a vacation thing. What she found instead is that play and joy and fun are possible every single day. We don’t have to wait until retirement! Many high achieving people think of play as diversion. Instead, however, it’s a pathway. The people who take a pause for fun are the people who have long term energy for their passion. The more we take care of ourselves and enjoy our lives, the more likely we are to be successful! Prioritizing play is a way of prioritizing self-care. And self-care is always good for us! When Kaitlyn mentioned saving play for special occasions, like vacation, I thought of my clients! So often, we save the “good” food, like chocolate cake, for special occasions. We think we have to wait for holidays and birthdays and vacations to enjoy eating things we love….when in reality, we can eat fun foods we enjoy every single day! We don’t need to wait till some later fantasy time. Before We Get to the Fun Stuff… First, we have to check in with ourselves and find out what might be getting in the way of living with joy! Culturally, we’re used to running ourselves into the ground and NOT taking care of ourselves, especially when the form of care is playing. There isn’t much messaging out there that supports our desire (and need) for play, so we might run into some internal blocks when we give it a go. It’s important that we recognize the need to pause and identify what sort of internal beliefs we might have about play so we can really let ourselves enjoy it. Another problem: Cinderalla Syndrome. We say we “can’t” play till all of our work is done. Kaitlyn says no! We have permission to pause, to take a play break, and to come back to our to do lists after we’ve taken a break. Because in reality….if you can’t stop till all the work is done and there is nothing left to do….you’re never going to stop. It will never all be done! (Listen in to the full episode to hear a story about how this played out for my brother and I as kids!) Don’t Deprive Yourself Of Play If you’ve been a dieter, you know how easy it can be to get into deprivation mode. That attitude can translate beyond our food journeys and into our lives! Fun and play have to get prioritized if you want to live a full, abundant life! Kaitlyn notes that giving ourselves NEW beliefs about play can help with this deprivation mindset. + Play fuels my best work. + The more fun I have, the better work I do. + Play doesn’t have to be long. (Take 10 minutes! Some of the most enjoyable things in our lives take 10-15 minutes.) Sometimes we hold back because we think we need to be productive, and we don’t want to “waste” our time. Play, however, is a brilliant paradox. When we engage in play, we create so many positive things in our lives that fuel our ability to live the lives we desire. When we play, we lose our sense of ego and self-consciousness. We often get into flow states, and there aren’t specific outcomes attached to it. And when we get into this state….our productivity in the rest of our lives can sky rocket! Why? Well, play allows our active brains to rest, and it also lights up the part of our brains that are creative and resilient. In childhood, we pretty much rest and play, rest and play. There is no deprivation! Kaitlyn encourages you to think back to your early life; what did that young version of you LOVE? Where did she spend her time? What did she enjoy doing? Those are great ways to reactivate playfulness and fun! And remember: If you want to stop depriving yourself, you have to get devoted to your own delight. Fun & Enjoyment As An Adult Kaitlyn remembers roaming free outside a lot as a kid, and she knows that sort of play really impacted her adult play styles. She loves to get outside and move freely! Another childhood delight, writing, is something that she connects to playfulness and joy as well. As an adult, Kaitlyn uses these early memories of things that brought her joy and delight to tap back into a sense of wonder and delight when she plays now. Practically speaking, it can be hard for adults to add play to their day when they’re first getting started. Kaitlin recommends looking at is a sort of ongoing project. The goal isn’t to figure it out in an hour; give yourself time to experiment and try things out. Make a list of things that sound fun, and keep a “fun journal”. Record the things you do for fun and rate them on a scale of 1-10. Be a scientist of your own play. What’s working? What’s not? There’s no failures, just self-learning. If you have just 10 minutes, be creative and see how you can fill that time. Kaitlyn shares that she knows how to juggle, and she keeps a set of juggling balls at her desk. She can juggle for 3 minutes, have lots of fun, and tap into a different part of her brain. Coloring, doodling, dancing, taking creative photos, watching a hilarious video and laughing out loud, walking barefoot in the grass, climbing a tree, rolling down a hill, doing a magic trick, setting a puzzle…. There is no limit to what constitutes PLAY and what you might find delightful. Kaitlyn calls these play snacks, and encourages you to work them into your life in small increments throughout your day! We’re Seeking Engagement So often we find ourselves in the kitchen when we’re really seeking the feeling of being present and alive. What if sometimes you aren’t physically hungry, but instead you’re soul is hungry for FUN and play? What are some ways you can feed your soul when that’s what you need? Kaitlyn shared she’s been inviting people into “fun” dates recently. They might talk, but the goal is to play and have fun! That might mean playing a virtual game, coloring, or painting together. Inject newness and novelty into your lives and relationships as PLAY. Breaking molds and shaking things up a bit can bring so much light and positive energy into your day. This is especially key now, as we continue to whether Covid (and smoke issues, here on the west coast)! Finding ways to have fun throughout the pandemic can help you maintain your mental health and stay positive. Kaitlyn also notes that this is the perfect time to go inward and really connect with yourself and your own desires. Ask yourself what’s fun for you, and be open to creative options that you can do alone, especially if that’s not your norm. Learning how to have fun alone and play by yourself can be really life-giving. Give it a try and see what you can learn about yourself!

Today’s guest, Marcella Friel, brings us the wonderful world of tapping (Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT). Marcella is a food and forgiveness mentor for health conscious women, and one of her specialities is using tapping to heal. In this episode, Marcella does a round of tapping with me that you can follow along with if you’d like to give it a try! Tapping can be so helpful! Personally, I’ve been using an app called The Tapping Solution recently, and it’s been a really excellent way to wind down and connect with myself. In the upcoming months you’ll be hearing from LOTS of guests, as I’ll be taking a bit of a maternity leave. There will still be a new episode every Thursday, just fewer solo-casts until after the baby is born. Food & Forgiveness Mentor Marcella considers herself a food and forgiveness mentor for health conscious women. Her main tool? Tapping! This is also sometimes referred to as EFT or the Emotional Freedom Techniques. She has a book, two bestselling courses on The Daily Om, and an online mentorship academy all centered around healing our relationships with our bodies, food, and emotions. Marcella shares that she grew up with an immigrant background, and never remember dieting as a young woman. The older women in her family didn’t read fashion magazines or take part in “diet culture”, so she didn’t have much awareness or interest in that area. Later, Marcella attended culinary school and continued to grow her interest in the healing properties of food. As she continued learning, she decided to combine tapping with her therapeutic food work. As she started hearing her client’s stories, she recognized the power of using food to cope with emotional pain and trauma. Even though she hadn’t experienced dieting, Marcella had dealt with her own trauma and pain. Now, she’s that food and dieting are not the answer to emotional pain and healing. Tapping to Heal I shared with Marcella that I found tapping after I had already healed my relationships with food. Even though it wasn’t part of my early intuitive eating journey, I definitely see how it could play a powerful, helpful role! She shares that the idea of emotional freedom found in tapping isn’t about freeing ourselves from all negative feeling. Instead, it’s about keeping emotions from becoming trapped inside. Too often, we hold onto heavy negative emotions, rather than allowing them to leave our bodies. This impacts the limbic system within our brains. Practicing EFT allows us to use tapping to release them. As we call forward a difficult or stressful experience or feeling, we use our fingertips to tap against our skin, often on the head and face area. The tapping is used to down regulate our limbic system, and allows us to release. Marcella shares that she used tapping to release shame and negativity around comments her sister had made about her body as a child. Even though they may have seemed like silly, childish things, some of those comments had stuck! EFT helped her release them, as well as the body shame she had held as a result. Who Do You Think You Are? When she started her career, Marcella kept feeling doubt around her ability. The words, “Who do you think you are?” kept ringing through her head. Marcella worked with a tapping practitioner to revisit early memories that had created the belief that she had to be alone to ever succeed. With tapping, she was able to choose a new belief that was empowering and positive. By engaging in the emotional healing process herself, she was better equipped to work with others who desired the same freedom. Another way to use tapping? To deal with the present! Recently, Marcella realized that the fires and environmental tragedy on the west coast had really been impacting her. Recognizing the amount of grief and pain she held, she used tapping to access and release it. Tapping is part of soul healing. It’s a chance to really transform at the deepest levels, and it is a powerful way to work through body shame, emotional eating (allowing yourself to feel instead of consume!), and disconnection with self. If you’re thinking your problem is “sugar addiction“….think again! As you resolve the emotional issues, you’ll find your own, organic relationship with any food or substance that has felt problematic in your life Archetypes of Feminine Power Marcella shares that, with her clients, she uses the seasons to work with various female archetypes. This includes the Maiden, Mother, Queen, and Crone, and can encompass many ways of feeling and being. Throughout this rich cycle, client work includes tapping, reflection, wholistic nutrition, Ayurveda work, and more. I love holistic approaches, because they show how many elements are included in our relationship with food! From relationships with power, to how we were mothered….food begins to connect to so many things in our lives. Tapping to heal is powerful because it allows you to enter into this relationship in a new way, and finally release things that have been pain points. Marcella notes that this is one more reason why dieting just doesn’t work. When you don’t deal with the emotional elements of food, restriction and binging won’t serve you in the long run. Instead, you hold things together as long as you can, and then everything falls apart. This is painful, and creates more shame and guilt, which usually kicks off another dieting cycle. A Tapping Demonstration Let’s try it out! We’re going to be using the phrase “I don’t like the way my body looks.” as a starting point. You can be even more specific if you have a body part you’re specifically struggling with. For tapping to heal, here is a basic framework to get set up: Identify the issue you want to tap on. Ask yourself what emotions come up around that issue: shame, disgust, overwhelm, panic, etc. Gauge how distressed you feel about the thought/issue, using a 1-10 scale. Create your set up statement by tapping the fleshy, outer part of one hand with the fingers of your other hand. Move through the rest of the tapping points with a variety of statements and questions. In our session, the statement we used to start with was: Even though I feel __________ when I __________ I deeply love and accept myself anyways. If you listen in, you’ll hear how we move through different tapping locations and statements in our session. Tapping can feel really strange, because you use a lot of seemingly negative statements. However, speaking true things out loud (even if they are hard) while engaging in tapping can be a powerful form of release and freedom! Honor & Acknowledge Once you’ve honored and acknowledged a possible hard truth….you can start to question it. What if that “terrible” idea really isn’t true at all? And what if you can actually choose a new belief? Starting with a hard truth that feels really, really REAL and true is powerful, especially if you’ve gotten used to the overly positive self-help world that seems to always be pushing us towards positivity. The relief of feeling hard things, and even saying hard things out loud, is incredible. If you haven’t tried tapping before, you might find it a useful healing modality! (And if you don’t connect with it, that’s okay too!) And if you do give it a try….I’d LOVE to hear about it. Send me an email or a DM and let me know how it goes!

Christina Montalvo is the founder of The Confidence Project. She’s a personal trainer and intuitive eating coach, with a course called Diet Culture Drop Out. Today, we focused on counting macros. Christina has a really interesting story about getting started in the wellness space, and how dramatically her approach has changed since those early days! To learn why you shouldn’t be counting macros, listen in today! (Plus, a few notes on why using your phone to tell you when to cook, workout, or go to sleep isn’t the greatest idea.) Reminder: You have two days left to leave a review of the podcast and get FREE access to my holiday workshop! This is a fun giveaway in honor of my 100th episode, and I’d be honored if you took part! Just leave your review and send me your screenshot. In November, I’ll send you your access to the workshop and feel amazing throughout the holidays! Anti-Diet Strength and Conditioning Christina started as fat loss coach! Since then, she’s realized her entire education was steeped on intentional weight loss. Being a personal trainer meant helping people lose fat….it just came with the territory. However, since then she’s pivoted. Now, she owns an all-women’s strength and conditioning gym outside of Chicago, where she’s an anti-diet strength and conditioning coach. Her first memory of her body being a “problem” was when she was 10 years old. That’s when she started dieting, which launched her disordered relationship to eating and food. It was never considered disordered by others however; instead, it was applauded as what she “should” do to maintain her lifestyle and weight. During these time, she tried pretty much every diet under the sun. When she found counting macros, she thought she had found “food freedom”, because she could eat anything she wanted. Christina noted there was nothing and no one to point out how disordered and unhealthy all of this was. It wasn’t until she was an adult that she was able to identify the fear-based, confirmation biased-based information that the diet (and nutrition) industry so often spread. Freedom in Counting Macros? During her honeymoon phase with counting macros, Christina thought she was living the dream of food freedom. However, that all came to a head as she realized it didn’t provide the freedom from diet culture that she had hoped for. The macro nutrient component to a food can be found in everything we eat. These are carbs, proteins, and fat. When you do macro-counting, you create a caloric deficit and then create a plan when you’re “allowed” a certain number of macros for each of the big three categories. Some people add fiber counting as well. If you’re into macro counting, you’re usually attached to a tracking app AND measuring and weighing everything. Serving sizes, number of ounces, and ratios of macros become all consuming! In Christina’s personal and professional experience, macro counting is limiting and based on control and restriction. You may be “allowed” to eat pizza….but as a result, you can’t eat almost anything else for the day (or are restricted to very few items). Macro Counting Wasn’t Worth It Christina would work hard in the gym, often doing two-a-days, and religiously track her macros. Eventually, she realized that for the amount of time and energy she was expending….the results weren’t that phenomenal. The celebration of losing .5 pounds, or of making incremental changes to her body, started to no longer make sense. As a result, she started thinking more deeply about her relationship with food and exercise. She started making changes in her own life and habit first. (At the time, she was teaching macro counting to clients as well!) She would find that when her clients would participate in healthy activities, nothing mattered to them if the scale didn’t change. Even when they were doing things that should feel really good in and of themselves….they weren’t enough when the focus was on losing weight. Christina also noted that professionals in the field, as well as clients, weren’t prioritizing or celebrating behaviors that felt good AND that were good (like getting sleep, enjoying moving your body, and living a life you can enjoy), unless they could directly attach them to losing weight. Tempted By Counting Macros? Christina notes that there is something to be said about relying on technology, like macro counting apps, to tell you what to feed your body. A previous client of Christina’s, who was macro counting at the time, broke her phone. She immediately spiraled, because she couldn’t make eating decisions without seeing the “green bar” or knowing how she was “supposed” to eat, based on her app. The idea that we need outside intervention and technology to tell us what food to eat is ridiculous. Humans are born knowing how to eat, sleep, and use the bathroom. We know how to read our bodies and understand what we need. Rather than relying on external voices (diet industry! apps!) to tell us about our own bodies….what if we tried listening to our bodies instead? I loved that Christina talked about this, because it is so important! A few weeks ago I talked about my own relationship with my phone. I think we can all learn a lot about how technology interacts with our bodies, and how we sometimes use it to override our own biological cues. Another issue? When you’re counting macros, sometimes you’re really hungry…and sometimes you’re “force feeding” yourself plain chicken breast in order to meet the requirements of your macro plan. Rather than listening to your actual body and the needs she is communicating….you end up relying on “rules”, restrictions, and often an app to tell you what you MUST consume. So many of us are SO attached to our screens: TV, smart phones, tablets, and more! If that’s you….be sure to listen in to this full episode! Tracking It All! Christina and I also discussed the current fad with tracking everything on smart watches. For instance, so many people track their daily step counts, and often 10,000 steps is the “goal”. As Christina notes, that step number is arbitrary. It doesn’t mean anything, and it isn’t special or accurate. However, many of us like to have yes/no, or right/wrong rules to follow. We like to think that when we hit a step number, burn a certain number of calories, or complete a certain sequence of events, we’ve done everything right! And we love being right, and feeling we’ve been doing the right thing…even if it isn’t ultimately serving us. Too often, people attach morality to fitness trackers. (Christina has a whole podcast episode on this HERE!) We think of ourselves as being “better” people when we do everything our trackers say we should be doing. However, the also means being unattached to our own volition. We end up stripped of our own power, following rules instead of listening to our bodies and following our own intuition. When you have a chance, remember to leave a 5 Star Review over on Apple so you can get FREE access to the holiday workshop!

Today’s guest, Judith Gaton, is a style coach for curvy women. She’s also huge proponent of fashion for every body! Judith helps women love and dress the body they are actually in, instead of the body they think they want. We talk about our culture's obsession with “smoothness”, and how to be confident in the whatever size we happen to be! This is a GREAT episode, and I hope you enjoy it as much as we did! There’s ONE week left to rate & review the podcast on Apple and get access to the Food Freedom & Holiday Workshop (a $47 value!). If you want to enjoy the holidays this year while also feeling really good in your body, this is a super easy way to make it happen! Just send a screenshot of your 5 star review to caitlin@caitlinball.com. Does Your Mindset Fit Your Outfit? As a style coach, Judith coaches women to both love and DRESS the body they are in right now. No dieting or Spanx required! (Fashion is for every body, right?) According to Judith, you can feel good in your clothes right now. No change needed. Part of that comes from finding the clothes that fit right, and part of it comes from adjusting your mindset! Janky thoughts and a cute outfit just don’t go together, so Judith helps you address BOTH sides of the equation! After losing 60 pounds, Judith realized the shitty thoughts she had about herself hadn’t gone away. Instead of a magical year with ALL the wins (which she thought was going to happen when she lost weight), she found that she was still struggling with the same problems. She still had the same mindset, and weight change hadn’t fixed that! Getting her own mind and body on the same page was the journey that led Judith to realize she could love herself at any size and in any moment. As she gained her weight back (and realized it was completely possible to love herself and dress well), she also found that a lot of women who had lost and regained weight were not coming to the same conclusion she was. Rather than feeling more free and accepting, they felt shame and frustration. That difference in her journey (as compared against many other women’s experiences) led Judith into her current career! Fashion Industry Shapes The fashion industry loves it fruits! Pear shape…apple shape…we’ve all heard the shapes. Judith got sick of the way we are constantly being asked to categorize our bodies. (Or having them categorized for us!) According to Judith, it’s BS!! When we’re constantly taking in information about the shape we supposedly are, we also get a bunch of rules about what those shapes are allowed to wear. We use the body shape tools against ourselves to impose regulations. We also end our categorizing ourselves in unkind ways….which is never great! Judith notes that information that we just use as information can be great. Once we stop using information as a tool and start using it as rules, however….things start going wrong. These rules start to take all the fun out of getting dressed….and that’s something that should always be fun! Another way to consider this information is to ask if it’s useful. If it’s helping you have more fun and live your best life, great! If it’s creating shame and making you feel bad about yourself, then it can go! There’s no need to hang on to rules that don’t serve you. How Does This Make You Feel? Judith had a client whose previous stylist had told her that her body and coloring was perfect for a classic style. Her secret? She HATED that style. But she didn’t tell the stylist, because it seemed like such an important “rule” based on factors about her body, shape, and coloring. Judith helped her see that any style choice that made her feel unhappy about her clothes or body wasn’t for her! Does it fit your body? Your personal style? (Which is ever evolving as you grow and change!) Your lifestyle? Does it make you happy? Do you feel good in it? There are so many questions that are more important than whatever “rules” may exist in the fashion world! Judith also notes that there are so many ways to be fashionable. Fit on your body, as well as your lifestyle and your need for comfort, are all possible considerations. Fashion For Every Body You can buy clothes for the body you have…even if it’s not the body you expected or wanted. This means wearing clothes that actually fit, instead of giving in to the temptation to force into the clothes that you “want” to fit! Judith encourages her clients to clean out their closets of all the things that don’t fit properly. In her opinion, these old clothes that are too small are like little piles of shame! Judith recommends that you get rid of them (or at least move them out of your sight!). It is 100% worth loving your body right now, as it is. That includes comfortable clothing. You deserve to have bras and underwear that feel good, and are made for your size! When you insist on wearing things that are too small and tight, you’re holding your body hostage to an old ideal that doesn’t feel good. (You also might be interested in this episode on grieving your dream body.) Your Body Is How it Should Be Whether you’re dealing with weight gain and or weight loss, Judith encourages clients to think of their bodies as being exactly the way they are supposed to be. Weight changes are not “right” or “wrong”. It’s so freeing to look at your body and believe that it is exactly the way it should be! It releases you from all the shoulds, and allows you to appreciate it just as it is. No change needed. (That means you can dress it just the way it is also!) One way to keep up to date on the fit of your clothing is to set a timeframe (like every 2 weeks, or each month) and try on all your clothes. Get rid of what doesn’t fit, or is worn down and needs to go! (Looking at you, ratty underwear!) If you use this timeframe-based plan you can slowly replace clothing a few pieces as a time, rather than waiting until a majority of things are uncomfortable or worn through and needing to replace all of them at once. Slowly but surely, you’ll be able to build a wardrobe that fits your life. Dressing a Postpartum Body Judith recommends new underwear for sure! Things are shifting and moving, and it’s an act of self-care to make sure you’re adjusting too. Another option is to consider buying or renting maternity clothing in smaller size. These clothes tend to be comfortable and work well as you’re adjusting to a changing body that’s still going through lots of shifts! Give yourself time to find your “new” center. Your body has done so much, and you can honor it by being open to dressing it in new ways that suit it. Above all, have fun with it! Dressing should be fun, and fashion can be enjoyable for every body! (And remember: elastic has a shelf life! If you’re maternity pants aren’t working any more….it might be time for them to go!) To Spanx, or Not to Spanx?? Around minute 23 Judith and I go deep on…. SPANX!!! If you’ve tried using Spanx to fix your body image problems…or if you’ve ever worn them and wondered if it’s “bad” to do so….or if you LOVE your Spanx and feel like a queen when you put it on…you need to listen in to this episode! Remember that fashion is for every body, and you don’t “need” Spanx for that to be true for you! (Biggest take away? TALK to yourself! Be real. Be open. See what you learn.)

Elaine Williams (Coach Elaine) is the creator and emissary of the V.I.B.E Method. She helps women align their health and fitness goals with their soul purpose. Today, we talked a lot about the weight of our thoughts. Once you start you’re intuitive eating journey….you start to feel lighter. Elaine helps us understand the WHY behind that powerful thought transformation! Reminder: you can get FREE access to my holiday workshop when you leave a review of the podcast! Just create your review and email me a screenshot, and I’ll get you access. (You can DM me the screenshot if you’d prefer too!) A Journey Towards Wholeness Elaine started out early in life as an athlete. She quickly related food to being able to keep up with sports. That included carb loading and “free” patterns of eating whatever she wanted. Eventually she suffered an injury….and found that she kept eating as if she was really active, even when she wasn’t. Basically, Elaine’s eating patterns didn’t catch up to her injury. This started her on the journey of embracing harmony, as she was determined to find what a harmonious relationship with food, body, and energy could mean. As she grew older, this interest led Elaine into her current career. Now, she loves to help women find a more purposeful relationship with food and with their bodies. Something that stands out as a pivotal moment in her journey is the college basketball injury that redirected her life. Until then, Elaine had planned on being a professional basketball player. Her back and neck injury caused her to finally ask this question, however: What can I live for that I love? Answering this question changed her whole trajectory. A Healing Journey During her 10+ year healing journey, layer after layer was revealed. Elaine found herself trying physical and mental healing opportunities. She chose to be curious, and to dabble in anything that presented itself. Needing to go deeper still, Elaine found herself working on emotional healing. This is what began to feel transformative. Emotional and spiritual healing intertwined to create a magical experience. Having passed through so many layers to reach healing, she feels this can best be described as a sort of alchemy that was achieved after she surrendered her own agenda and control. Whether you think of this as spirit, God, alchemy, the universe, or anything else….Elaine found healing that works! She notes that timing is essential, as you must be able to meet each layer with presence. You can’t bypass any part of the journey, and you miss the essential gifts along the way that enable you to embody what you learn. Bringing Food Into the Picture At first, Elaine had no idea that she had an unhealthy relationship with food. That discovery came after a hard breakup, after which Elaine found herself controlling her food as a means of controlling “something” in her life. She realized that she was engaging in a domination-based relationship with food, as result of needing to feel in control of something in her life. Because everything else felt like it was falling apart, food felt like something she could do something about. Now, Elaine would ask someone in that position to ask themselves: When will that shift? How long do you have to be in that dynamic with food before you realize it’s not working and make the choice to start changing. In her own journey, Elaine doesn’t remember exactly how long it took her to notice and change this issue. She speculates it might have been around 10 years! Something she noticed was that, in addition to beginning to control her food, she started becoming secretive. It’s as if she was going inward to hide what she was doing, and to withhold the truth to others. “I Need Help” Recognizing the power of the impulse and obsession of food control caused Elaine to seek help. She knew that she was the one who had initiated this imbalanced food relationship, and she knew she create change. One thing she noticed coming up a lot was the need to “re-choose” the kind of relationship she wanted with food. When she was tempted to pull back or return to old, control-based habits….she had to consciously choose to reengage with the choices and lifestyle she desired. Finally, the obsession and control-based eating ended. Elaine encourages you to not give up if you find yourself struggling. Simply notice, and choose to reengage with your healing. And noticing and reengaging could take a few hours…..a few weeks…a few months. There is no “wrong” time to notice, and it’s never to late to reengage! Like Simi Botic shared with us, “It’s not failure, it’s feedback.” If you take time to listen to the feedback you’re getting from your body, then you can always create change. There is always something to work with. The Weight of Thoughts We usually aren’t taught about the weight of thoughts in school, or from our families. But the reality is, our thoughts can truly weigh us down. They carry a weight, an energy, and they absolutely do impact our lives! Most of us have about 60,000-70,000 thoughts per day. On average, 70-80% of those thoughts could be thought of as having a denser “weight”. If a large majority of our thoughts have that heavy, energetic weight….of course we feel them! And if you can start releasing those thoughts, we can literally start to feel energetically lighter. Engaging in higher frequency thoughts activate lightness, and allow us to feel lighter! The weight of thoughts can drag us down…but also create buoyancy and joy within as well. Once way to start decreasing the heavy weight of thoughts is to start considering the narratives we are carrying. All too often we have thoughts from our parents, families, religions, societies, and other in our minds and bodies. But no matter where those thoughts came from, we can take the initiative to release them and free ourselves from the weight. Once clients have talked about their thoughts and beliefs, Elaine brings in the V.I.B.E. Method. This starts with visioning, which involves grounding into an awareness of what has happened in the past while also envisioning their empowered, higher self. This vision of both the past and the future enables them to identify patterns and make aligned choices to move forward. There is a lot of healing involved here, including from past trauma. The more we allow ourselves to see, however, the more we can heal, release, and move forward with courage.

Today I’m sharing a few quick life updates on me and the pregnancy! I’m also going to share how intuitive eating and pregnancy actually have a surprising number of similiarites! Psstt! Have you listened to the 100th episode? ALL of the past guests shared their incredible self-care tips. Take a listen, and try the practices that resonate with you! And remember – when you leave a review and send me a screen shot, you WIN! Pregnancy Updates If you’d like to hear more details about my first trimester of pregnancy and intuitive eating, you can listen in to THIS previous episode. In trimester two my nausea calmed way down – woohoo! Not too long later, however, the heartburn kicked in. That’s not something I normally deal with, so it’s very noticeable in my body! I’ve definitely thrown up a lot more in this pregnancy than the last one. I also feel like I’m SO much bigger than I was at this point in my last pregnancy. That might partially be from this being my second pregnancy, and partially because last time around I was still teaching yoga at this point. I can NOT imagine doing that this time! Recently I’ve also noticed an increase in hip pain. That’s normal, from what I hear, but it’s definitely not super fun. This time around, I’ve also been getting weekly progesterone shots. Since Cooper came early, we’re trying to get closer to full term with this one! (Although when I imagine getting bigger still, I’m not sure how it’s going to happen!) Similarities Between Intuitive Eating and Pregnancy Trimester One Similarities: Intuitive Eating and Pregnancy In your first trimester of pregnancy, you often end up eating a lot of carbs. You might be averse to veggies, or might be trying to ward off nausea. Either way, it’s usually different than your normal eating patterns! Similarly, when you start intuitive eating, you’re suddenly free to eat anything. And lots of time, women find that they are drawn to carbs that they’ve previously restricted! The early stages of intuitive eating tend to feel really different than any way you’ve eaten before, and that might include an aversion to veggies and a bit of carb loading. And that is completely fine! Trimester one often holds some body image stuff as well. You don’t usually quite look pregnant yet…but you’re pants start to not fit well, and you don’t feel like yourself. When you start with intuitive eating, this can happen too! You might feel a little bloated, your pants might feel strange, and you’re in a strange limbo. Trimester Two Similarities: Intuitive Eating and Pregnancy Often in trimester two your body starts to crave more diversity again. You can eat more veggies, and you might even find yourself craving a salad. Even though there are still a ton of changes happening, you feel a little more at home in your body. The second stage of intuitive eating is often like this too! You’ll find yourself working in more colorful fruits and vegetables, not because you “have” to but because you actually want them. You’re body has started relaxing around foods you’ve previously restricted. You’re learning and growing a lot, but you’re starting to settle in and feel a bit more comfortable and confident. Hunger/fullness becomes more important during this phase of intuitive eating as well. You’ll start to play with what satiates you, what feels right at different times of the day and for different activity levels, and what works for your body. Similarly, during your second trimester of pregnancy hunger/fullness are important. Physically, the baby is pressing against your stomach. You might find that you need to eat smaller meals, or do more snacking during the day. Even if that isn’t your “norm”, you may find that you need to adapt in order to do what’s right for your body. Recently I realized that when I order my usual order at our favorite sandwich shop, I was feeling STUFFED when I ate the whole thing. I used to always eat my whole order! I realized that things have changed with the pregnancy…and that I should adapt as well. Last time we went I ordered a half order, and it was perfect. During your intuitive eating process, you don’t have a baby pressing into your stomach that reminds you to evaluate your fullness levels! You may need to tap into your body a little more intentionally, and really check in. Trimester Three Similarities: Intuitive Eating and Pregnancy In the next stage of intuitive eating, you get to focus on self care! This typically happens once you’ve figured out your fullness level and are back to eating the foods that feel right for you. You’ve also usually invested some time into your body image and self-love. I’m comparing this to the third trimester of pregnancy. Things are still changing, of course, and it’s key that you learn how to holistically care for yourself. The third trimester of pregnancy is all about the self-care! Same with intuitive eating. Long-term, it’s about self-care that provides the balance to continue making choices that feel good, rather than simply turning to food. For me right now (in my pregnancy), that means movement! I find I feel best when I do yoga or some other form of movement. It helps me sleep better, it reduces my aches and pains, and overall makes me feel better! (And it’s FUN! I can’t stress how important fun is when it comes to movement!) I’ve also been doing projects around the house, like preparing the nursery and getting organized before the baby comes. My emotional needs have also been super important to pay attention to. There is so much happening in the world (and state) right now, not to mention in my body! Self-care is a key element of my holistic process. Self-care also helps me NOT eat my emotions; both as a pregnant women and as an intuitive eater! Finding ways to make myself feel good and care for my full self (body, mind, emotions, relationships, etc) allows me to make choices that leave me stronger, happier, and more rested. (And if you’ve recently been pregnant, you might be interested in my postpartum body confidence interview with Brittany Woodard!)

Welcome back! Last week was a self-care smorgasbord with ALL my past guests. What a fun way to celebrate 100 episodes of Quit Dieting for Good. If you missed it, you can find it here (and learn about the PRIZES you can win)! Today, Summer Innanen joins me to talk about body image. She’ll share how loving your body doesn’t have to apply to only physical appearance. This episode is amazing for all women who could use a fresh perspective on body love! The Weight Loss Quest Summer is a professionally trained coach specializing in body image, self-worth, and confidence. Her own body struggles started early, and she experienced decades of chronic dieting with many binge/repeat cycles. She also had a tendency to over-exercise (something Julie Newbry and I dive into on Ep. #87!) on her quest to “lose the weight once and for all”. She honestly thought that is what she was “supposed” be doing. Now, she sees the time, energy, and investment she put into pursuing that goal weren’t good for her or her body. Summer even quit her corporate job to pursue nutrition. She wanted to help other women eat “right” and lose weight as well, since it was something she was obsessed with in her own life. Eventually, however, she realized that she was hurting herself. Gradually she started to learn more about self-acceptance, self-love, and intuitive eating. When she realized that every single client coming to see her was there because they hated their bodies….she realized she needed to change how she worked with people. Now, Summer specifically focuses on body image with her clients. Self-Love Misconceptions Summer’s work now has almost nothing to do with food. If her clients are processing in that area she recommends intuitive eating resources, but she focuses her coaching efforts on body image. She’s found that our relationship with food naturally changes when we address our body image and self-love. She notes, however, that loving your body doesn’t HAVE to mean loving what you see in the mirror. One of the biggest misconceptions with body image work is that it’s all about how you look. And although there is nothing wrong with loving how we look, it’s the very surface level of body image work! Often, we feel the way we feel about our bodies because of various identities we hold, experiences we’ve had, and messages we’ve received. It comes down to self-worth, and our beliefs about our own worth. This comes down to inherent self-belief. As Summer notes, this isn’t just a matter of learning to find yourself attractive. It’s so much deeper than that! Loving Your Body As It Is Too often we’ve been that our worth is dependent upon our desirability. When this is what we believe, of course we want to look in the mirror and think of ourselves as attractive! However, you can find yourself worthy & desirable — without changing anything about your body or appearance. This practice of separating worth from appearance can help relieve some of the stress you might feel about your body. Summer also noted that many women hear about self-love and loving their bodies and feel overwhelmed and guilty: they take on the mindset of “I should love my body….and now I’m doing that wrong too!” There is so much freedom in letting go of that pressure and allowing yourself to simply BE, without needing to judge or evaluate anything. Letting go of your own expectation about how you “should” feel about your body can help you take your body love to another level! Summer’s Personal Body Love Journey Summer shares that her own journey with body-love involved a recognition of how she had desired validation from others. So much of the pressure to look a certain way was about having other people SEE that, and as a result to like her, to be impressed by her, or to think positively about her. This part of her journey involved letting go of people pleasing and the need for validation! She also had to let go of control and settle into surrender. This required her to release her own expectations and allow what WAS to simply be. Gradually, she was able to relax into the understanding that she is good enough, just as she is. There is no need to force her body into looking a certain way in order to control the way other people think about her. And she doesn’t need to change anything about her body in order to be more deserving of worth, value, and acceptance. Summer notes that the diet industry often gives us a sense of false hope. When we see a new food program, or start a new diet, we get a little dopamine rush of excitement. We imagine all the ways in which we are going to be better, stronger, thinner (more deserving of love and acceptance)…and it fuels our drive to reenter the dieting cycle. Letting go of that can be hard! In fact, we might even need to give ourselves time to grieve the loss of this magical “dream” body that we’ve spent a huge part of our lives seeking. Loving Your Body When you accept your body for what it is, what do you let go of? Shame, guilt, pressure, stress, body-hatred? All too often diets are disguised in packages of hope and glittering promises…but in reality the don’t serve us at all. Loving your body is a choice that can help you accept yourself fully. Once you’ve made a bit of body-love progress, it can be really hard to wake up and have a HARD body day. And yet…they still happen! Summer suggests that if (and when) this happens to you, don’t catastroph-ize it. Instead, tap into what you’re actually feeling. Not thinking! Feeling. (Thinking might be: I hate my hips. Feeling might be: I feel ashamed.) Are you feeling stressed, ashamed, frustrated, anxious? Try sitting with that. Acknowledge that it’s there. You could try journaling, or even sharing it with someone that supports you. She also suggests considering what else in your life might be contributing. For instance, one of Summer’s most recent body-shame experiences occurred shortly after her dad unexpectedly passed away. She realized she was completely overwhelmed with grief and sadness, and her body immediately triggered an old coping mechanism: shame over something “wrong” with herself that she needed to fix. Feeling Your Feelings It can be easier (in the moment) to pour yourself into body-hatred rather than to fully sit with grief and shame. When you give yourself the opportunity to really just sit with your feelings and let them be, however, you may be able to find that your problem really isn’t your body. This is a perfect opportunity for a self-compassionate response. Offer yourself whatever you would offer to a friend or child who was going through this same situation. Self-compassion can feel strange if it’s not something you’re used to practicing. Be patient with yourself and be willing to sit with things you might usually repress or push past. Also – don’t forget to care for yourself. Summer notes that often she’ll have clients going through a downward spiral, and when she asks them what they’ve done to care for themselves….the honest truth is NOTHING. No time for self-care! And yet, taking that time to care for yourself, even in a small way, can be a huge step towards bringing things back into balance.

Friends, this is EPISODE #100 of Quit Dieting for Good. Wow! I can’t believe there have been so many amazing episodes, guests, and insights. During the two years I’ve been podcasting I’ve moved across the world (Switzerland to California), eaten amazing food, met wonderful people, and continue to live through a global pandemic. (Plus, I have a baby on the way!) Through it all I’ve been able to come here every week and connect with you, and that’s been my favorite thing of all. This week, I’m bringing you a self-care celebration! Spread the Love! Episode #100 is such a fun milestone, but that’s never been my goal. Quit Dieting for Good is about spreading the message that all women can live joyful lives — no dieting required! Food freedom and body confidence have always been important parts of my message. Now more than ever, ALL women need to hear that they can be free from diet culture! Will you help me share that message (and this self-care celebration!) by taking action? You can leave a review wherever you listen (Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Podchaser, Player.fm, etc). Once you’ve done that — I’d LOVE if you would share this episode with your friends & family members! And here’s something super fun! Whoever leaves the FIRST review will get a personalized notebook of your choice from Papier! The next TWO people will get gifted an intuitive eating book (we’ll check in with each other first so I can make sure I choose one you don’t already have!). And the next FIVE people….you get something too! A Starbucks gift card so you can go get a coffee, tea, pastry or whatever you’re craving. And for everyone else — if you leave a review between now and October 31st, I’ll gift you free access to my $47 Holiday Food Freedom Workshop. In order to make sure I don’t miss anyone, here’s what you need to do: Screenshot your review! Email the screenshot to caitlin@caitlinball.com or send the pic to my Instagram DM’s. That’s it! PLEASE be sure to send me the screenshot, because I can’t see reviews from other countries, and I know I have lots of international listeners. I also don’t want anyone to miss out on awesome prizes! Prioritizing Your Own Self-Care Long-time listeners know that I ask every guest to share their favorite self-care tips at the end of every interview. Since this is episode #100, I’ve gathered a LOT of tips! None of them require tons of time and money (as fun as a week at a spa would be, it’s not on today’s list)! They are meant to be easy, fun, enjoyable things you could try today! Before we get to the guest’s tips, let me share mine: Choose 2-3 self-care ideas that you can do every single day, and do them! In addition, have a rotation of 5-10 other self-care activities you can practice throughout your week. First of all, you should have something you can do every single day, just for you, that feels good. It might be something you already do, but pinpointing it as something you do specifically for yourself can feel really good. (And serve as a reminder that you DO take care of yourself.) If you can’t think of anything, create a few easy options you can work into your daily life. I have two things. First, a five minute meditation I do before bed. I enjoy it, and it makes me feel good! I also write in my gratitude journal every night after my meditation. Have I ever skipped a day? Yep! But when that happens, I don’t beat myself up. I just get back to it the next day. I know it makes me feel really good, and I make it a habit to prioritize it, even when life is a little crazy! Throughout the week, I also like to read fiction books. I add in other kinds of meditation, make tea or get a chai latte, and work on craft projects. I LIKE to do things that make me feel good! In fact, I even make an effort to plan these things into my week. I look for moments and opportunities to practice self-care and create space for myself to BE. Need ideas? Keep on listening, and be prepared to jot down the ones that resonate! A Self-Care Celebration Sleeping & Resting “Sleep is so underrated. It’s amazing how people just obsess about food when there are so many other basic health self-care things that are equally if not more important than the food that we’re eating.” Isabel Foxen Duke Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on rest! Movement, Meditation & Breathing “I made sure at least 3 days at week I was working out. It was more for mental clarity and to feel like I was doing something to take care of myself.” Angela Holliday-Bell “Get into the body, which is the best place to be.” Isabelle Ysebaert Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on movement, mediation, and breathing! Daily Intentions & Self-Talk “So often when we have a negative emotion come up, we’re so quick to suppress it or distract ourselves from it and label it as bad. It’s not. Feelings are meant to be felt…you can look at it as your body communicating with you. Just sit with it. Let it be, without labeling as good or bad. What you resists persists.” Chelsea Gross “Take a step back and ask: What is one little thing I can do for myself today? Communicate to your body: I see you, I hear you, I’m listening.” Claire Chewning Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on setting intentions and positive self-talk! Treat Yourself! “I got myself a new nightime face cream and have been doing it each night, and it’s felt so fun and luxurious!” Paige Schmidt “Using essential oils in the shower. Pop some lavendar oil in…steam it up, and it just feels luxe. It’s beautiful.” Susie Garden Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on treating yourself well! Routines & Rhythms “I am a believer in the morning routine. This is the rudder for your day.” Ashley Conway “It’s creating a non-negotiable routine…that supports me in practices that help my wellbeing.” Michelle Grant Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on setting routines that feel good! Journaling “Every night I write the 3 things I am most grateful for. It really helps you change your mindset about things and remember the good things in your life (and your body)!” Victoria Welsby Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on journaling! Social Media Self-Care “Instagram shows you more of what you already look at….and you can pump the brakes on that and ask, “What do I want to be seeing more of?” Kira Onysko “While you’re scrolling your feed, if you have any sort of negative feeling, unfollow that person. We get ot control what we’re following and seeing…start filling your feed with accounts that showcase all body sizes.” Maria Simpson Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on social media self-care! Making Self-Care Fun “We need to be able to do feel good things that are easy. And we sometimes need to feel that sense of accomplishment as humans.” Alyssa Tennant “Don’t feel selfish for taking 10 minutes out of your day to learn something you’re interested in.” Julie Newbry Listen to the full 100th episode for ALL the amazing tips on making your self-care celebration FUN! Choose Your Own Self-Care Celebration! So many amazing ideas! I hope you choose the ones that make you feel excited about self-care (and share this episode so the women you love can do the same)! Keep on practicing in your own life, and don’t forget to send me your screen shot once you’ve done your review. Not only will you be helping me and this podcast, you’ll be helping women around the world learn that dieting is NOT the only option they have!

This week’s episode features Lindsey Kane, the Director of Nutrition at Sunbasket. I started getting meal kits for family meals because cooking (and planning, shopping, and putting together meals) just hasn’t been that fun lately! Ordering meal kits has been easy, enjoyable, and oh so delicious. AND….once I was on Sunbasket’s email list I started getting messages about intuitive eating. How amazing! Since the messages were being written by Lindsey, I knew we had to talk! *If you decide to try Sunbasket from my link, I get a little bonus (and you get $35 off PLUS 4 free bonus gifts)! But I promise, I’m only recommending them because I’ve been using and loving the products. How Lindsey Got Her Start Lindsey, a registered dietitian based out of San Francisco, shares that Sunbasket is a meal kit delivery company. They have pre-prepped meals, as well as oven-ready options. You can get organic produce, clean ingredients, and delicious recipes delivered weekly! Growing up, food was a big part of Lindsey’s family. She associated it with family and memories. She also loved the independence of packing her own lunches and creating wonderful food. As she went on to study science & anatomy and play various sports, she started getting more interested in nutrition and its role in our lives. The concept of food as medicine got Lindsey excited to weave her passions together and become a dietitian! However, she realized she didn’t want a “traditional” dietary career. In fact, at the end of her schooling she was afraid she might have picked the wrong major. She didn’t want to have a reactive role; instead, she wanted to work with prevention! First stop? A grocery store job that let her interact with customers, provide workshops, and really get engaged with nutrition on the ground level. I Don’t Know That the “Dieting” Method Works…. It didn’t take Lindsey long to start feeling that the dieting method wasn’t working in real life. Clearly not everything from the classroom was translating into real life success in the real world. Looking back, this is where she started shifting towards a different message. When she arrived in San Francisco, she joined the start up world and started applying all the feedback she had been getting from her previous work in nutrition. Her experience and new found confidence inspired her to change her messaging and really engage with the intuitive eating world. Knowing that traditional messages about food, health, and dieting weren’t working for people gave Lindsey the drive to share a different message. Part of that included realizing that “health” involved so many more components than just food. Your social, mental, emotional, and physical lives are all part of your overall health. Meal Planning & Diet Messages Lots of diets really on strict meal plans that advocate restricting various foods or food groups. Planning your meals does NOT have to be about following a diet, though! Lindsey acknowledges that meal kits sometimes play into this. In fact, some meal kit companies actually have pretty heavy diet-related messaging. However, you don’t need to feed into that! When you look at meal kits and other meal planning services, you get to make choices based on what appeals to your needs and tastebuds. Lindsey shares that she makes her choices based on what looks good when she chooses. She knows the meals will have a variety of vegetables and proteins, but she doesn’t examine all the nutritional details. She advises you sign up with any “meal plan” you want (Chef’s Choice, vegetarian, etc) and, within that, feel free to mix and match to choose the meals that appeal to you. Based on customer ordering habits, Lindsey has seen that many customers are searching key words (like paleo, keto, grain free, etc) to find meal planning services that will work for them. For that reason, Sunbasket does arrange their meal kits within those parameters. However, she is pleased to notice that many customers don’t restrict themselves to only those meals. Fighting Diet Culture As a practitioner, Lindsey notes that having a safe space to process your own food beliefs is so important. And if you found your way to Sunbasket because they offered a sort of meal plan that you see through the lens of dieting, that’s fine! Once you’re there, however, she hopes you might expand your understanding of what it means to eat intuitively and to enjoy fresh, exciting meal choices. Not to be pessimistic, but Lindsey also points out that diet culture isn’t going away any time soon. For that reason, she’s a believer in developing coping skills and resiliency. Sometimes you have to put your own blinders on! At the end of the day, ask yourself: Will this food serve me? This question applies to your physical body, your emotional needs, and your overall sense of wellness. Does Lindsey Use Meal Kits Herself? When Lindsey first started at Sunbasket, she could see how awesome it was…but she didn’t plan to use it. After all, she figured she enjoyed doing her own shopping and cooking. (She didn’t “need” help!) Now, however, she finds herself ordering frequently. She loves making the decision about what to eat at the beginning of the week, and knowing she’ll have the ingredients she needs to make fun, creative meals. Sunbasket helps her stay out of a rut of repeatedly making the same basic meals, and helps her continue to feel creative and inspired in the kitchen as she tries new recipes. In addition to her Sunbasket meals, Lindsey notes that she still likes to frequent her local farmer’s market to get extra veggies and other fresh goods. Satisfy Yourself Lindsey loves the intuitive eating principle of the “satisfaction factor”. At Sunbasket, she works hard to make sure that taste and satisfaction are major priorities. As people are able to focus on being hands on and creating flavorful meals, she hopes they’ll begin to enjoy their food journeys more. Personally, I really appreciate this! I enjoy cooking, and I want to make real food that truly tastes good. After a whole lot of takeout (that was fun for a while, and then felt really blah), I’ve really enjoyed coming back to the kitchen and making food again. I’ve REALLY enjoyed not having to go shopping for ingredients. In addition, ordering meal kits has made the end of this pregnancy so much simpler. The variety and new flavors, choosing my new recipes each week, and being back in the kitchen has truly satisfied me — and that’s something I can get excited about! If you’re getting curious about meal kits, I’d invite you to check out Sunbasket and save $35 on your first order today!

Today I talk about something I’ve been practicing having: a healthy relationship with my phone! Technology is amazing…but it can also really intrude on day to day life. I’d love to share what I’m doing to improve that relationship, because I think it might benefit you too! AND — the Quit Dieting for Good Podcast is coming up on 100 episodes! I started about two years ago, and here I am! Sharing this podcast with you is something I truly love doing, and I’m thrilled to continue! If you’ve been a listener and you love the show, would you do me a favor? Head to your listening app of choice (here’s a How-To for Apple Podcasts) and leave me a review today! Done? Send me a screenshot to caitlin@caitlinball.com and I’ll be sure to send you something special! A Healthy Relationship with My Phone Does it sound a little weird to use the word relationship here? After all, phones are just things, right? Well, I’m calling this a “phone relationship” because we spend so much time on our phones every day! And since relationships are all about time….it seems like a fitting word for our phone usage. Personally, since Covid hit I found I was spending up to 6 hours a day on my phone. Yikes! (The average American was spending 5.4 hours per day BEFORE Covid, according to a Provision Life study ZDNet shared!) Since I use my phone for business and personal life, cutting down can feel tricky. However, during a recent stay-cation I realized that if I was sitting at home looking at posts about other people’s “real” vacations I was going to get super bummed. To remedy that, I told people I was signing off, and deleted the FB and IG apps off my phone. This obviously doesn’t get rid of social media; if I needed to, I knew I could check in on things from my computer. Instead, it just removed the quick access I’m so used to having. On Day 1, I found myself going on my phone and seeing my thumb head for the spot my IG app used to always be. In fact, my YouTube app moved into the old IG spot, and I found myself accidentally opening it multiple times. (It’s like my phone had been programming ME! Crazy!) I was also picking up my phone a LOT….which made me start to think that maybe I don’t have such a healthy relationship with my phone. Hmmm…. It’s Not Just a Social Media Problem Once I got rid of my social media apps I started checking my email all the time. I felt like I was obsessively checking in (even when all there was to “do” was delete junk emails). When I didn’t have quick access to social media, I just turned my attention to other things to do on my phone. That was enough to show me that the problem was bigger than just social media. It was about my phone in general (hence “phone relationship”)! I needed a game plan that went beyond social media apps! This brought me back to How to Break Up With Your Phone, by Catherine Price. She breaks down a ton of facts and figures (it’s so interesting!). She also shares about the addictive qualities of our phones that are making us unhappier. Phone programmers are doing everything they can to keep you ON your phone. Have you noticed that? Since it’s in your phone creators best interest to keep you on your device, they engineer everything to keep you on. (Or trying to get back on when you’re off!) Something else interesting: the biggest names in tech severely limit the amount of time their own families spend behind screens. They have the inside scoop, and it’s clear they don’t want technology to take over their lives. But since it’s how they make their money….they certainly aren’t stopping the rest of us! What Are You Doing? I noticed that I have a habit of getting on my phone for a purpose….then finding myself knee deep in social media feeds and emails….with no recollection about WHY I was even on in the first place. It’s kind of like walking into a room and not remembering why. Except this version eats up hours of my day. I noticed that any time I was waiting for something, or there was a single moment that could be filled, I was looking at my phone. And I didn’t like that! Something else: every morning I was checking my email and social media for almost 20 minutes. It wasn’t even time I was really accounting for (so I never realized it was “missing” from my day). Once I stopped doing that, I felt like I had so much extra time in my day! As I started to have a healthy relationship with my phone, I was pleasantly surprised at just how much of my day I was able to free up. Here’s What I Did Instead + Cleaned Up My Home Screen I put all my social media apps into a folder. I also moved my mail icon to the very last page. You don’t have to have it on that main, easy access bar. And moving these things a bit further away creates another layer of accountability. + Prioritized Podcasts and Audio Books I get to choose WHAT I do on my phone. And when I stopped scrolling social media feeds all the time, I was able to prioritize things that make me feel good instead. It was so much more enjoyable to listen to amazing material, rather than mindlessly scrolling apps and killing time. + Actually Read Real Books Rather than laying in bed scrolling my phone….I started going to bed and reading. In two weeks I read two books (which is pretty good for me)! I read All Adults Here and Then She Was Gone. They were both great, and I know I would have never read them if I had kept up with my (slightly obsessive) phone relationship! + Started a Weaving Project Not only did I start a new weaving project, I also keep up with my painting project. It feels so good to be creative and have ongoing projects to look forward to. Rather than telling myself I’m “too busy”, evaluating my relationship with my phone has helped me see that I have more time than I used to think. + Meditated Every Morning & Did More Yoga With all that time I saved in the morning, I started meditating EVERY day. I also found I could often add in a bit of yoga too. (Remember, I had been spending about 20 minutes every morning on my phone!) Scrolling is addictive, and it eats up a ton of time. I know, because I’ve totally been sucked in! In fact, I still have to catch myself, because it’s such a easy habit to get into. + Just Sitting & Thinking You know those couple meetings between things? Waiting for an appointment, standing in line at the store, sitting in the car waiting? It is SO easy to fill those moments with your phone. But you don’t need to do that! I realized that a lot of my mindless scrolling left me feeling unhappy. I’d see what other moms, wives, and entrepreneurs were doing, and start to think that I *should* be doing that too. Even though just sitting and thinking doesn’t feel super fun….it also doesn’t tend to leave me feeling down, discontent, or unhappy! And sometimes it even sparked my own great ideas! + Taking Less Pictures This one has pros and cons. I was able to be more fully present when I wasn’t taking as many pictures. It was fun to just BE there. On the other hand, I LIKE having tons of pictures and thinking about what to post. + Finding Ideas on Pinterest Since I didn’t have my usual social apps, I did find myself using Pinterest more. Unlike some social apps, I feel like Pinterest gets me excited about DOING things in my own home and life. That’s not a side effect of my regular phone use, so I chalked it up to a win! + Text & Phone Conversations Sometimes a friend crosses my mind…and I go check out their social profiles. Since I didn’t have the apps, though, this time I actually texted. This resulted in more text conversations and even a few phone calls. Fun! This was another phone use that felt good. Do I Have a Healthy Relationship With My Phone? Well, it’s still a work in progress! I did a 24 hour phone fast, which I enjoyed. I’m scrolling less, and being present more. It’s been great, and I’ve been able to incorporate my phone back into my life with a new outlook. However, I have found that my phone is addictive! I clearly need to create a few safe guards to help myself enjoy a healthy relationship that feels good. One tool I’ve found useful is an app called Space. It helps me track how often I’m opening my phone, and it helps me know when I’m turning to my phone as a diversion throughout the day. I’ve found that being creative and being off my phone feels really good. Now when I reach for my phone, I ask myself if I actually need my phone. And if it’s just a habit (or an avoidance mechanism), I give myself a chance to sit with what is instead of distracting myself online. My mornings have also become much more special to me. I love doing mediation and yoga, and I love minimizing that early morning “noise” that my phone brings into my day. And when I notice that I’m checking too much, or falling into old habits, I’ll bring myself back to doing what feels really good for me. I know now that I can use my phone a lot less than I have been…and I know that that feels really good for me and my life. I’m making more conscious decisions about bringing technology into my life, and I’m honoring my needs. It feels really good!

Until I had a child, I never realized just how vital (and elusive) sleep can be. That’s one reason why hearing from Angela Holliday-Bell on prioritizing sleep for this episode was incredible! As a pediatrician and avid sleep enthusiast, she shared great information about what sleep is, how it works, and how you could get more of it. Alert! My Quit Dieting For Good group program + support system is open for enrollment for just a few more days in 2020! I would LOVE to see you there; check it out at www.caitlinball.com/quitdieting. You can expect to gain confidence, stop stressing over food, and experience your own transformation! Mixed Messages About Sleep In addition to her pediatric training, Angela has also studied in clinical sleep health. Now she sees both pediatric patients and also provides sleep consultations, in which she helps clients improve their sleep habits and get better sleep. This might pertain to enhanced performance, or even just regular quality of life. As you know, sleep impacts every aspect of your health and wellbeing, which is why it’s honestly so important. It may seem basic (or obvious), but it’s also life changing when you take action! As a health coach, I’ve seen the correlation between sleep and eating patterns come up for many of my intuitive eating ladies. Improving sleep quantity and quality can be a major part of their journey. Angela shares that every part of our lives are effected by our sleeping. And even though we often hear that we *should* be sleeping more…it’s also a badge of honor to talk about how little sleep you actually get. From parents comparing notes to colleagues boasting that they’ll “sleep when they’re dead”, many of us receive mixed messaging about actually getting the sleep we know we should be getting. You have to understand: the more you sleep, and the more quality that sleep is, the more productive you’re able to be during the hours you’re awake. Sleep pays off! What Does Sleep Impact? We all have a legitimate NEED to sleep! And it’s not just about sleep feeling good. When you’re sleeping, your body produces hormones to help you repair muscles and restore your body. In addition, a number of cognitive processes are assisted when you get your Zzz’s. Your brain moves memories from short term to long term memory while you sleep (one more reason to stop with the all-nighters if you need to learn something)! Your ability to pay attention is significantly impacted by lack of sleep. So is your mood! Your ability to monitor and adapt your own mood is decreased when you’re lacking in sleep. And to make matters worse, your reaction time goes down across the board. In tests that study reaction times and functioning, people who sleep less than 7 hours per night perform significantly worse than those who are getting enough sleep. A Three Pronged Approach to Feeling Good Exercise, nutrition, and sleep are part of a solid, three pronged approach to a feel-good life. Why is sleep included here? Well, Angela shares that lack of sleep causes your body to up-regulate your hunger hormone and de-regulate the hormone that makes you feel full. In addition, your body is more likely to burn muscle for fuel and store fat when you are sleep deprived. And finally, insufficient sleep can cause your body to increase cortisone. Whew! Prioritizing sleep to maintain your health is clearly vital! And if you’re already NOT feeling well….sleep is a key part of assisting your immune system and aiding in the healing process. No matter what your current state is, sleep can help you feel even better! The Four Pillars of Sleep Hygiene Sleep can be so hard, because so many factors can impact it. Sometimes, it’s a bit of “chicken or the egg” quandary. For example, people with depression are more likely to not sleep well…and not sleeping enough can cause or exacerbate depression. However, Angela shares that many questions about sleep come down to the four pillars of sleep hygiene. Have a consistent bed time and rise time. Angela shares that the time you go to bed and get up shouldn’t differ more than an hour on either side. This includes the weekend! It does take effort and training to create a regular sleep system; 4-5 days on routine and then a wild weekend makes it really hard for your body to get into any sort of helpful rhythm. Have a routine. Parents often understand doing this for their kids, but they don’t realize they should be doing that for themselves as well! Just like our kid’s brains understand that bath time, reading time, or other calm-down activities are signals that bed time is coming, our brains will do that too! Whether you meditate, read, or listen to calming music, find ways to slow yourself down and prepare yourself for bed as well. (And do what you can to avoid blue light from screens in the hour or so leading up to bed!) If it’s not working, get up! Angela notes that the mind is really strong, and makes a lot of connections. If you lay in bed and don’t fall asleep, your mind starts to churn. What time is it? How long do I have to sleep? What if I can’t fall asleep? To avoid the mind racing questions, get up and do something quietly until you’re sleepy. This can prevent your mind from connecting your bed with anxiety, which is not helpful. Use your bed for sleeping (and other adult activities, of course) only. You shouldn’t be eating, watching TV, or doing other activities there – you want your mind to clearly connect your bed with going to sleep. As you focus on prioritizing sleep, it becomes easier for your mind and body to crawl into bed each night. Prioritizing Sleep Angela takes prioritizing sleep quite seriously! She shares that she takes a hot shower in the evenings, and enjoys aromatherapy lotions. She also journals each night. Because of her own experience with insomnia, she’s found that her mind tends to kick in with a lot of thoughts about the rest of her day as she lays down. Rather than lay in bed and think about those things, she uses journaling as a way to let her mind process her day. That keeps her from getting ambushed by all those thoughts once she lays down. (This could be the perfect time to give gratitude journaling a try!) And if sleep is out of your control (like when you have a newborn!), Angela recommends sleeping when the baby sleeps. Even though it might be tempting to clean or take care of other things around the house, let yourself sleep instead! As long as it isn’t too close to bed time, napping allows you to reap the benefits of sleep. (PS – if you’ve never heard of a Snoo, you can find out what that is here!) The more other factors might impact your own sleep, the more important it is to create routines and rhythms that allow you to priories your sleep in whatever way possible. To learn more about sleep stages, sleep inertia, and the ideal length of a nap, listen in to the full episode!

This week’s topic has been inspired by my clients! On a recent call, they were all having their own version of a bad body image day. It was great timing, because they were able to experience it together. Sometimes it’s so powerful just to know you aren’t alone, and to be supported by other women who get what you’re going through! Before we get to how you can recover from these bad body image days, I want to share something special! We’re currently partway through the Better Body Image Challenge, but it’s not too late to JOIN! There are special bonuses for all the lovely challenge members! The Need for Control We’ve all had bad body image days. Whether our clothes don’t fit right, we feel we’re not fitting in, or we’re just overall discouraged – it happens to all of us. Often it feels like they just come out of nowhere! The reality is, however, bad body image days don’t come out of the blue. On my group coaching call, I pushed a little deeper to learn more about what else was happening. Unsurprisingly, each women in the program had stressors in her life over and above body image. From huge moves to postponed weddings, they were carrying a lot! Often, when our world feels like it is falling apart or out of control, we turn to controlling our bodies as a coping mechanism. We want to be able to control something, and we turn that need on our bodies. Even when we want to be free from old mindsets, stress has a way of pushing us towards old habits. 5 Tips for Recovering from Bad Body Image Days Tip #1 – Check in with yourself and identify other stressors. Give yourself the time to identify other stress factors that may be bothering you. Because honestly: the size of your body is likely not the only cause of your frustration. This is also a chance to see if you’re keeping up with your self-care. Two of my clients on the call realized they had had a lapse with their normal walking and yoga practices. These were things they really enjoyed as forms of self-care, and when they quit doing them, they saw a difference! Whether you’ve been extra busy, changed your routines, or were taking a break, you’ll often find there are side-effects when you cut yourself off from self-care habits that have been reducing stress and helping you feel good in your day-to-day life. Tip #2 – Allow yourself to feel your feelings. When you suppress your feelings, things tend to come out a bit sideways. You’ll find another way to express your frustration, hurt, or anger – and that might get channeled towards your body! It is absolutely okay to feel “bad”. Whether you need a good cry, a pillow punching session, or venting to your bestie, don’t be afraid to feel whatever you feel and let it all out. Tip #3 – Go back to basic body love practices. Now that you know your stressors and are feeling your feelings, you can start showing your body love. One option is to try a body gratitude practice. Choose a time of day, and spend time thanking your body in specific ways. Yesterday my body gratitude included thanking my body for completing a yoga class, even though I was stuck inside all day. All day long your body is showing up for you. She helps you be the partner, parent, colleague, creator, and all around human that you are. Thank her for it! And not only does gratitude feel good, it helps move you away from the build up of negative mental talk. You might envision that negative voice as being hurt or scared. Try using positive talk to soothe it. As you become calmer and more centered on gratitude, you may find your bad body image day slipping away effortlessly. Another option is to dress your body in a fun, meaningful way. Wearing a fancy dress you don’t have a reason to put on often, a brightly colored scarf, or something else that helps you feel confident and good can go a long ways towards defeating a bad day! Finally, imagine you and your body are friends, and ask her what she needs right now. Once she tells you, listen and act! Whether that means a hot bath, a long walk, a restful evening in, a vigorous bike ride outdoors, a delectable chocolate snack or a lovely homemade dinner – do what you can to honor the needs your body communicates. Tip #4 – Double down on self-care. Sometimes you need to double down on the stuff that makes you feel good. In addition to body love practices, what else do you need? Nourishing meals, a special gift, time with a friend – what can you give yourself that would feel really good right now? Interestingly, we’re sometimes tempted to turn away from self-care when we aren’t doing well. The more negative and frustrated we feel, the more tempted we are to hibernate with Netflix and shut down. Often, however, that is not the approach that will make us feel the best! If you have self-care favorites to draw on, do that! And if not (or if none of your old standbys appeal to you), don’t be afraid to try something new. Maybe an improv class, an expressive dance experience, an outdoor adventure, a new book store – do a bit of digging and see what stands out! Tip #5 – Remember it was just a day. No matter how rough it feels, it’s still just a day. You haven’t “ruined” any progress you’ve made, and this isn’t permanent. Sometimes bad body image days happen. They can feel like they come out of nowhere, and they can effect us each in a different way. Don’t put pressure on yourself to be perfect, and don’t assume that you’re failing because things aren’t feeling really good in the moment. A bad day doesn’t have to turn into a bad week, month, year, or life (even if it feels like it could!). In fact, bad days can help us enjoy the good days that much more. Next time you’re having a rough time, take a deep breath, listen to this podcast again, and try some of the tips. And if you’re ready to make a long-term change because you’re done fighting the same body image fight again and again, feel free to check out the Quit Dieting for Good program. I’d love to see you there!  

This week’s episode is a fantastic look at post-partum body confidence. Brittany Woodard shares SO openly and honestly about her own journey with her postpartum body image. Any woman who needs a body confidence boost will benefit from listening in! Recently I was on a client group call and it seemed like everybody was having a bad body image day. It inpsired me to create the Better Body Image Challenge. This is a FREE, 4 days challenge that includes a daily email AND live training from me. It’s all new material, and I’m so excited to share it with you! We’re kicking off August 25, so sign up today! Mom-Life Inspiration Brittany is a registered dietitian who specifically works with moms on regaining their body confidence! Becoming a mom changes your body in so many ways. Plus, mom life can be hard! Whether you’re looking to stop dieting, find food freedom, or come to a place where you can accept your bodies changes — Brittany is there for you! In addition to being a mom herself, Brittany got her start working at a WIC clinic. Before that, however, she spent two years in Nepal with the Peace Corps. That experience is what inspired her to want to work specifically with women. After giving birth to her own children, her focus narrowed even more. Moms who had given birth and who were now dealing with body image “stuff” became her passion. Eventually, Brittany’s career came into focus; she uses cognitive behavioral therapy to help moms stop dieting, get used to their bodies, and overcome the constant diet culture messaging. The concept of getting your body “back” after giving birth is ridiculous. This pressure women feel to bounce back and meet idealized body standards just isn’t healthy. It leads to guilt, shame, and frustration. Rather than resenting your body and forcing yourself to pursue something impossible, Brittany focuses on helping women love and accept themselves. It’s NOT You! (And there isn’t anything wrong with you!) Brittany’s early decision to get into dietetics was partially based on her own interesting in diets. At first, she thought that by being a dietitian she would always have the inside scoop on which diets were the best. As she learned more, however, she began to realize that NO diet truly worked. Rather than discovering the best diets, she discovered the reality that dieting isn’t the best option for your physical or mental health. Her greatest revelation: it’s NOT you. Nothing is wrong with you, your body, or your genetics. This understanding helps her work with post-partum moms in all stages of post-birth! I shared a bit with Brittany about my own journey with post-partum body confidence. Even though I was already doing intuitive eating, I found out I definitely had more body confidence work to do! Around the 3 month mark, I got really frustrated with my body. I didn’t want to be wearing maternity pants any more, but I also didn’t fit into my old clothes. Motherhood is so high pressure, and not “snapping back” into my old version of normal felt like one more thing that wasn’t “right” in my mothering journey. The Power of Thoughts & Beliefs Brittany shares that awareness is such an important part of the journey. Her clients come to her knowing that they are unhappy with something – maybe their dieting habits, maybe their body image, or maybe just a general sense of dissatisfaction. Being aware that there IS a problem is what helps them get in the door! Once there, Brittany works with them using cognitive behavioral therapy, which is based on how thoughts create actions. In a nutshell: Our thoughts and beliefs are what create our feelings and ultimately our actions. When we can change our thoughts and beliefs to something more empowering and positive, we’re better able to have feelings and take actions that allow us to live the lives we desire. This process isn’t easy, but it is powerful and it does work! Brittany helps women ask questions and challenge unhelpful and unhealthy beliefs that are leading to behaviors that don’t serve us. + Where do these ideas come from? + Who is telling us these things? + How can you change your mindset and bring yourself into a more positive mindset? When you ask questions like this (and are open to answers that may surprise you), you can make powerful changes in your life! False Standards Often celebrities are held up as the gold standard when it comes to post-partum body confidence and expectations. What we don’t consider, however, is the reality that their lives are not like ours. They have nannies, and night nurses, and people to cook, and clean, and ultimately airbrush them into the pictures of perfection we see in magazines and online. They aren’t living the way we’re living! When you’re a new mom, dealing with ALL the craziness that goes into parenting, the last standard you should be applying to yourself is that of a celebrity who has resources you can’t even dream of. What you’re doing as a mom is important, and it’s hard, and it’s not anything you need to judge yourself for! You also don’t need to constantly be with other moms, family members, or friends who are obsessing over weight, diets, and changing their bodies. Brittany encourages women to surround themselves with a supportive community that offers love and compassion. She also advocates for you to be willing to share about your own desires for body confidence and diet freedom if that feels right for you. You don’t need to continue interacting with diet culture groups and conversation 24/7, especially if you’re trying to move away from that for yourself! And if someone you’re really close to (like your mom!) is really stuck in that way of thinking, you don’t need to “change” them! Do what you can to deflect and move away from those food-based, body-shaming conversations….and give yourself the freedom to live in a way that feels better for you. (Get some tips on how to deal with dieters here.) Having a smaller body won’t make you happier. (Just like having money doesn’t make you happier.) Brittany encourages women to learn to love themselves for who they are. When you do this, you’ll find there is so much to appreciate about your body!

I’m back from a mini stay-cation that involved lots of home projects and cleaning. It wasn’t quite as good as a regular vacation, but our house does feel amazing! This week we’re digging into a big topic: healthified foods! These days, you can find “healthier” version of just about everything. From ice cream and tacos to smoothies and salads, there always seems to be some sort of hack being promoted! So when should you eat them? And when should you pass? If you’re interested in chaining things up with your eating, you might love my free 7 Step Guide to Kick Dieting to the Curb! Labels on Your Favorite Foods My favorite snack bar has a lot of labels on it: paleo, grain free, natural sugar only, and all that sort of thing. Labels can be triggering! When you’re trying to leave a dieting mindset behind, they can bog you down and keep you tied to certain rules about “good” food and “bad” food. On top of the labeling, we also have zucchini spirals for noodles, dates for dessert, cauliflower as pizza crust and potatoes — the list goes on and on! With all the substitutions and food transformation, it can get overwhelming. As someone who does occasionally enjoy zoodles, cashew parmesan, and all sorts of other healthified foods, all while also practicing intuitive eating, I know how confusing the can seem. You might be dealing with all sorts of internal questions, like: + How is this different than dieting? + Isn’t this another form of restrictions? + How can I do it “right” and stop obsessing over labels? And honestly, it all comes down to one thing: intention. Why are you eating that? I eat all sorts of date and nut snacks because I like them for what they are. They are date and nut snacks, and I enjoy them! They give me an energy boost, they have a bit of protein, and they taste great. However, they aren’t an alternate for brownies and cookies. Early on in my journey, I tried to eat them as a dessert replacement. I found myself eating a TON of them because I was trying to curb my dessert cravings. Ultimately, I’d end up eating way more date balls then I even wanted….and then caving in and eating brownies later anyways. That didn’t work for me! If you love the taste of a certain type of food, then you can let yourself enjoy that food. I can eat date bars and ignore all the labels, simply because I love date bars and I’m eating them for me. Based on my work with intuitive eating, that’s an intention I can feel really good about. Let’s Talk Healthified Pizza Cauliflower as a crust replacement is really popular right now. Let’s talk about it! If you’re thinking about eating cauliflower crust pizza for lunch, there are a few questions you can ask to figure out if this is diet based thinking or intuitive eating based thinking. Why am I choosing cauliflower crust vs. regular crust pizza? An intuitive eater might notice that a heavier crust option on regular pizza makes them feel a bit bloated and sluggish, and that they won’t have much energy later in the day. If they have a big night out, this might not be a great idea. A cauliflower crust pizza might be perfect in this situation! If they’re able to stay in, enjoy a regular pizza, and do something relaxing that doesn’t require much energy or focus, it might be a great night for regular pizza. Alternately, a dieter might be noting calorie counts and nutrition facts in order to determine whether they “can” eat pizza, or if they should settle for the cauliflower crust instead. Will this truly satisfy me? If you answer this honestly, you might realize that eating the cauliflower crust pizza might make you crave regular pizza even more. If you eat a substitute, you won’t be satisfied, and will keep eating in order to fulfill that craving. However, it could be that a cauliflower crust pizza is honestly exactly what your body and taste buds need and want. Perfect! Enjoy your cauliflower crust! If a regular pizza felt 100% allowed and was 100% available to you right now, would you eat that instead? This question helps you understand if you’ve fully released restrictions. Sometimes we think we’re choosing something for the right reasons, but we’re really just making fear based decisions connected to old dieting ideas. If that’s the case, I encourage you to try some of these “fear” foods so you can get them off the pedestal they’ve been placed on. You Won’t Decide Wrong Whether you choose healthified foods or not, you can’t make the wrong decisions! Whatever choice you make, you can use the feedback to inform your food choices next time around. A final tip? Don’t be afraid to rename foods! Recently, I had a client trying out new breakfast foods. I suggested sweet potato toast with peanut butter and honey on top. I’ve had it before, and it’s pretty yummy! She replied, “That doesn’t sound like toast to me….” In her case, she needs to rename that food in order to truly enjoy it. Otherwise, she’ll see it as a sad toast replacement, and she won’t be able to enjoy it in the same way. A few years ago, I offered a pumpkin muffin to my brother. He quickly told me it was awful. On second thought, I explained it was really more of a baked oatmeal cup than an actual “muffin”. Once he heard that he took another bite…and he liked it! When he expected a muffin, a baked pumpkin oatmeal cup was not an acceptable replacement! But when he knew what it was and he ate it as that, he enjoyed it. Rather than using healthified foods as replacements for the real deal, I’d encourage you to enjoy them for what they are, not for what they are “kind of like”. PS: Here’s the amazing Paige Schmidt interview on intuitive eating shaming that I recommended in the podcast!

This week I’m sharing my conversation with the amazing Kira Onysko. We had a chance to talk about to shift our workout mindset when it comes to exercise. She encourages you to embrace a performance based mindset (rather than a body-focused aesthetic mindset). Like so many of my guests, Kira’s work evolved with her own personal journey and struggles. This is a great conversation! Have you listened in to my on-demand training yet? It’s free, and it offers 4 steps that let you get started with intuitive eating today! If you’re ready to take care of yourself and feel good in your body, this is for you! You can check it out HERE. Kira’s Start with Movement As a certified personal trainer, Kira works exclusively with women. She’s highly passionate about teaching women how to incorporate fitness into their lives in a balanced, non-restrictive way as they improve their workout mindset. In her view, exercise and fitness shouldn’t consume your life. And all too often, they do! Kira’s family was always movement oriented. She grew up loving exercise and physical activity. Her extended family also embraced a food loving culture that brought them together around lots of food. As a result, she felt she had a pretty good relationship with food and movement. Around pre-puberty, however, her body changes started to impact her gymnastic performance. As she grew taller and gained a bit of weight, she started to feel her ability to perform in the gym and in competitions began to suffer. Her solution? To start limiting food and paying more attention to her diet in order to minimize weight gain. A few years into those patterns, one of Kira’s gymnastic coaches brought a box of donuts to year end party. When Kira passed, her coach took her aside and told her that she could have the donut. Whatever else she said in her pep talk, it helped Kira break out of her food restrictions and realize that eating was a normal, acceptable thing! The Downside of Workout Culture Post-high school, Kira experienced the absence of athletics and organized exercise. Having been an athlete her whole life, she missed movement, and she found herself not feeling as good as she would have liked. During that time, the health & fitness climate was very different. The only real adult role models in the field were fitness models and body builders. The mindset was – you work out to burn calories, lose weight, and/or change your body. This means that you eating habits get adjusted as well. Because you’re pushing yourself hard in the gym to burn calories, it’s natural to want to decrease caloric intake in order to help your efforts go farther. Obsessing over intake and restricting food is celebrated and expected. Because it’s so normalized, you don’t even realize it’s necessarily an issue at first! Eventually, Kira found her friendships and relationships were being affected. Missing workouts or consuming too many calories started to cause anxiety. She hesitated to go to new restaurants, since she couldn’t guarantee that she’d be able to find a food she felt she was “allowed” eat. Fortunately, during Kira’s degree program she was introduced to CrossFit. For the first time since school, she was able engage in movement that was performance based. There was no focus on mirrors, body size, or other aesthetics. Instead, she was able to make mind/body connections and engage in movement for the sake of movement. Fitting In with Fitness For the first time as an adult, Kira felt excited about working out without needing to change her body. She was introduced to the exciting variety of American Oreos, and she realized that you could enjoy working out AND enjoy good food that you wanted to eat. She feels that she finally “saw the light” of all that was possible when it comes to enjoying the you move and the way you eat, no strings attached. Kira did note that even within the CrossFit community, there can still be a lot of emphasis on food and eating. Dieting and food restriction is very bonding. It’s something to talk about, commiserate over, and compare notes on. It’s an easy fall back conversation, and it helps create a sense of belonging. Even if the movement component is something you love, sometimes too much focus on food can create a tension that doesn’t provide an ideal atmosphere. Also, that’s not to say that all food talk is “bad”. Eating to aid recovery and fuel workouts is important when you’re challenging your body and engaging in movement. And one of the best ways to make that happen is to get tips and tricks from others! The key, however, is to enjoy it as a conversation and then check in with your body to see what makes sense for your needs. Since her transition to CrossFit and weightlifting, Kira has had huge workout mindset shifts in her life. She now feels she is able to embrace movement and eating in a way that works for her body and needs. Performance Based Workout Mindset Kira shares that many of her clients have never truly seen when their bodies are capable of. Many times they’ve engaged with lots of cardio and light weights, but they haven’t really pushed themselves to try other forms of movements. When she puts programs together, Kira loves to create benchmarks based on “max effort”. In a certain amount of time, a client is challenged to perform as many reps or seconds of a movement as possible (pushups, wall sits, etc). More often than not, by the program mid-point all clients have surpassed their goals and feel really proud of how they’ve grown. These benchmarks have nothing to do with weight, measurements, or aesthetics. They are purely about personal bests and personal growth. Often, this sort of growth is more inspiring and motivation than previous metrics based on body changes. Although shifting the workout mindset can take time, it’s an amazing way to build confidence and begin loving your body! Exericse is NOT Punishment! Kira encourages her clients to engage in movement they actually love. Rather than trying to punish your body or force yourself to move in a way you think you “should” be moving….you can find things you actually enjoy. Don’t be afraid to experience with different options; you might be surprised by what you like! You might try exploring different classes and groups. Not only are you moving, you’re also engaging in a chance to meet others who have similar interests. Who knows, you might even find a new friend or two! Getting to have fun, make friends, try new things – these are ways to appreciate your body for what it can do, rather than just what it looks like. Kira also points out that many of our most amazing experiences in life are movement based. From water skiing to kayaking, mountains climbing to hiking, we often base whole vacations around moving in ways that feel GOOD for our bodies. You can find those sorts of movements and do them frequently (rather than just once or twice a year as part of a trip).

Social distancing is so important right now. It’s also stressful, hard, and can feel really frustrating. However, I also think that we can still have FUN while doing it! (Speaking of fun…if you haven’t checked out my summer self-care series yet, go do it! You can find all 5 videos over on my IGTV channel!) In these unprecedented times, I think we could all use a bit of fun in our lives! Also, in my signature training, How to Ditch the Food Guilt + Shame to Gain Confidence + Feel Free, I dive deep on what intuitive eating is and how it could work for you. Whether you’re just starting or could use a refresh, this is for you! Enjoying This Time Back in April my whole family booked our annual trip to Moon Lake, Washington. Our tickets were the cheapest they’ve ever been, and we were so excited! However, as the trip drew newer, we started to feel less confident about actually traveling. Ultimately, my husband and I canceled our tickets in favor of social distancing. It’s what felt right for us, and I know it was a good choice for where we’re at right now. However… Knowing the rest of my family is there without me has created some major FOMO. Plus, this is the first time in my life that I haven’t been able to make it! And even though it’s technically a small thing in light of everything else that’s going on globally, it still felt really hard. Rather than sitting around and moping, however, we decided to get activated and create a plan for enjoying that time we do have. From house projects to furniture set up, we put together a series of activities we can do around our house. We get to feel safe AND have fun together — and that makes what we’re missing in WA feel less heavy. As I record this, a part of me knows I “should” be in Washington with my family. It’s strange not to be, but I also know that I have the choice to enjoy the time I do have here at home! Food Can’t Replace Joy Even though having fun might not feel like it’s that connected with intuitive eating, it absolutely is! When we have fun we are engaging with our lives. We’re present in the moment. And we honor our needs to connect, celebrate, and notice all that is good. When we don’t do that? Sometimes we turn to food instead. If you’re not enjoying your life, you’re going to rely too much on food to fill the gaps. After all, eating is a coping mechanism! If you’re not getting fulfillment and joy from other parts of your life, you’re more likely to turn to food to get what you’re looking for. The reason you eat the way you eat as so many layers! Often, those layers have nothing to do with the actual food we’re eating. They are connected to our emotional needs, our struggles, our pain, and a whole assortment of other things! Right now, over-eating might be a response to social distancing. Rather than feeling guilty or ashamed, you can peel back some of those layers and look for other ways to help yourself get your emotional needs met. (And you can even find ways to have fun while social distancing!) The Foundation of Self-Care A quick note about how vital self-care is in the process of having fun! If you’re not taking care of yourself on regular basis, you won’t have the energy for adding into your life! Exhaustion, fatigue, and overwhelm might be signs that you need to build in a foundation of self-care that will allow you to engage in fun things. The best way to do this is to develop a routine that feels really good for you. This might include journaling, meditating, moving, or connecting with loved ones. Get clarity about what things feel really good in your life, and make sure that you’re building them into your life. You might also look for energy leaks! This week I had to get off social media for a while. Why? I was getting drained and overwhelmed by my social feeds. Taking the week away helped me consider if and how I wanted to add it back into my life. Rather than just slogging forward with my same old patterns, I noticed the issue and took action as a form of self-care! Once your foundation is set, you can up level by adding in fun! 5 Ideas for Adding In FUN While Social Distancing ONE – Take some time to sit down and brainstorm fun ideas. It can be hard to have fun if you’re stuck in a rut, or just watching time pass by. Once you have your list, make a PLAN! Often time passes us by because we don’t plan how we’re going to use it. You can think of this as a sort of summer bucket list. They can be small (eating an ice cream cone while taking a walk), or a bit more time intensive (plan out a summer picnic and take it to your favorite park)! TWO – Make time to connect with the people you love. This is harder than it once was! You might need to be more creative about you can spend time with those you love. If you have nice summer weather, you might be able to create an outdoor space to connect while still staying socially distanced. Another option? Phone dates! I used to visit with my friends while I was going places….but since I’ve hardly been going anywhere lately, I realized I wasn’t connecting with my friends as much anymore. Intentionally planning in phone dates with my friends has been so helpful for my own mental health. You can also try using Zoom or other video chat tools to have larger gatherings! From Beauty Counter parties to birthday parties – find a group and get together. Virtual connections do feel different, but they can be life giving, fun, and exciting all the same. (Listen in to the full show to hear about the childcare pod that we’ve created, which has been another connection point in our lives!) THREE – Projects! Head over to Pinterest and hunt for some new ideas. Personally, I’ve been working on a paint-by-number craft. My husband and I are doing some home projects. We’re starting a garden! I’m even looking into weaving. And, of course, I always love baking. Whether you return to an old hobby or craft, or learn something new, projects can be a huge source of joy and inspiration. Rather than park yourself in front of the TV, you can explore other options that might feel more life giving. Another note: projects don’t have to mean being productive! Finding things that bring you joy are wonderful. Give yourself space to be creative, to try new things, and to explore. Even if that means you end up making something and throwing it away, that’s okay! FOUR – Get outside. Fresh air and nature bring so much joy. You might try taking a walk around the block, finding a local beach, or taking hike. Not into all the activity? Try sitting outside with a cup of tea, or watching the stars from your backyard. Especially if you’ve been working from home, make the extra effort to get outside and breathe some fresh air when you have a chance. FIVE – Plan some day trips! Often we forget how many really neat things are all around us. My family lives in Albany, which doesn’t get super hot in the summer. I realized I was craving that summer heat! After a bit of brainstorming, I thought of a childhood friend whose mom lives in a hot area and has a pool. After a bit of connecting, we got the details sorted out and headed over. It was a blast! She was more than happy to see a family enjoying a pool that she doesn’t often use, and we loved the chance to swim somewhere that felt really safe and enabled us to maintain our social distancing practices! It was close by, it was free, and it was much needed! Maybe you could take a day trip to a park and have a picnic. Could you try picking blueberries or strawberries? Finding a quiet beach front or out-of-the-way trail? You might refer back to your summer bucket list for more ideas. What would you have FUN doing? What would bring joy into your life? Go do it and have fun!

This episode is a little different than the norm, but it was so fun! Natasha shares so much about what the enneagram is, how it works, and what it might mean for you. Best of all, we dive deep on how you can use the enneagram for self-care in order better care for yourself and your needs. The Quit Dieting for Good Program is open through September! It includes an incredible six-module course, along with 6 months of time together. You’ll be in a group with other amazing women who are working on their own intuitive eating journey. We’ll have 3 group calls per month, and we share so much with one another. The results are incredible! Interested? CLICK HERE! Natasha’s Enneagram Start Natasha Smith is an Enneagram Coach. She’s also a mom of 3, and is a multi-passionate entrepreneur. She’s a 6 with a 7 wing, and she loves to talk all things enneagram! (I think I’m a 7!) She shares that the enneagram is an ancient wisdom system. Even though it’s gotten popular in recent years, it’s definitely not new! In a way, it’s a personality typing system. Beyond that, however, it helps you understand WHY you do what you do. Rather than just telling you characteristics that you have, the enneagram reveals underlying motives that can help you in all areas of your life. The enneagram for self-care makes perfect sense! About three years ago, Natasha looked in the mirror and realized she just didn’t feel like herself anymore. She sought out a counselor, and shared she wanted to grow and change. Here, she was introduced to the enneagram. She took the test…and got the 3 result. Since she wasn’t feeling it, she went back and dug in deeper. After a lot of reading, studying, and test taking, she realized that it wasn’t going to work unless she took the test from the perspective of why she did what she did. (She kept getting a 3 result that didn’t resonate, and she realized she was answering the questions based on what she wanted to be true, instead of giving her truest answers.) Some of those answers were really impacted by her anxiety, which she recognized later as she began using the enneagram for self-care. Recognizing Anxiety (And her true type!) Natasha had dealt with anxiety her whole life, but she’d never recognized it. She called it other things, and refused to consider it was something that might affect her. After all, anxiety was debilitating and sounded awful! But when she read the 6 Type, she got completely overwhelmed. That was her. She felt so understood and seen, and realized that if others felt that way and were able to live full, strong lives, she could too. That’s what compelled her to start using the enneagram as a coaching tool for other women who were also seeking transformation! The ability to be present with yourself and your type is key to being able to connect with your full self. Natasha Shares About Being a Six Sixes can be wishy-washy. They tend to work through a lot of “worst case scenarios”, and anticipate the absolute worst outcomes at all times. Natasha shared she didn’t even realize this was something she did until she became more self-aware. Her detailed, instant thoughts were so negative and consuming; she realized they were showing up in all areas of her life. Finding her type helped Natasha recognize that she did struggle with anxiety. It also showed her the ways the was coping with it: becoming a workaholic, doing too much, and avoiding these feelings. She realized that she needed to slow down and allow herself to feel things. She practiced trusting that she could be safe, and that the people she loved could be safe as well. Noticing her default programming, and the way it kicked in throughout her day, was the self-awareness she needed to be able to be present in her daily life. Increasing her mindfulness and becoming more aware were powerful ways of tuning in to her reactions and responses throughout the day. In fact, her family quickly noticed the change as well. She was able to be calmer, more present, and less prone to thinking negatively. Part of embracing your enneagram type is to observe yourself without judgment, and to have grace for yourself as you discover more about who you are. Practicing this way allows you to truly use the enneagram for self-care; it’s a loving, gentle tool! Many women use food restrictions or emotional eating as a way of controlling or avoiding what’s really happening in their lives. It would be interesting to know more about how various enneagram types engage with the diet industry (and with intuitive eating)! Should I take the test? Natasha recommends holding enneagram test results loosely. The enneagram is a journey, and the point is to find yourself as you learn more about yourself. If you take the test and the results don’t really connect with you, it’s okay to take it again (and again)! Learn more about the numbers, and see if there are any that do resonate. Like her, you may end up with the wrong number — and that’s okay! She advises that you take a look at your top three numbers, and learn more about them. You’ll also want to think about WHY you do things. For instance, if you walk into a room and can easily identify what people may want or need, ask why? Is it to be loved? To gain attention? To get approval? Thinking about your motivations can help you get more accurate test results, as the enneagram truly emphasizes the underlying motivations you may have. Intuitive Eating & Your Enneagram Type Underlying motivations are highly important for eating practices too! Natasha shares that a lot of 9’s can struggle with either overeating, or being really restrictive. Because 9’s tend to sort of “fall asleep” to themselves, they aren’t always present in their bodies. They also tend to avoid conflict, and may eat to avoid problems. 8’s tends to have a lot of energy and passion towards things, which can lead to overeating as well. They may also eat more to deal with the stress of constant leadership exceptions. 1’s and 3’s are most likely to tend towards restriction. For 1’s, they often don’t want to look “bad”, and since overeating is often categorized as a “bad thing”, they will want to avoid it. For 3’s, being overweight can conflict with their desire to appear good in other’s eyes. Your type can contribute to how you cope, as well as how you think about food and your body. But it can also have a positive impact! Using the enneagram for self-care is a powerful way to listen to your body’s needs and care for yourself. (If you’re a 7, listen in to this part! I asked Natasha some specific questions on my type and she shared some great info.) The Enneagram Types (A Quick Glance) Ones & Threes 1’s are the perfectionists and 3’s tend to want to appear successful. A negative body image can lead to sense of moral failure or general unraveling. There’s this idea that if your body doesn’t look a certain way, that you’ve failed. Twos 2’s are helpers who do a lot for others. They also tend to struggle with self-love, which impacts their body image. It can be hard for a 2 to truly feel that they are fully enough as they are, and they often look to others to increase their own self-worth. Fours 4’s are often melancholy. They’re more creative, and they like to feel their feelings. However, they can also get stuck in those feelings and start to wonder what’s “missing” inside of themselves. Because of this, 4’s can get drawn into negative self-talk and self-criticism. They often feel “less than” if something in their lives is lacking. Fives 5’s are analytical. They don’t often dress flashy, and may tend towards letting themselves go because outward appearance just doesn’t bother them. Sixes With the 6’s, they tend to go back and forth. They’re doing great, then they aren’t. They’re following a plan, then they’re not. They are often in a battle with themselves, and that can translate to how they feel about their bodies. Sevens 7’s are often very active. They like to experience new things, but can sometimes get stuck in letting themselves go when they aren’t in a good place. Otherwise, they tend to be active and want to work on themselves and take things to the next level. Eights As strong leaders, 8’s can sometimes struggle with imposter syndrome. This can lead to a fixation with what’s wrong, and other negative thoughts about the self. Although they can be assertive and bold, they also refrain from being fully vulnerable and tend to turn inward when help is needed. Nines Since they have a need to numb themselves out at times, 9’s can struggle to know what they feel, and can even tend to feel nothing. They’ll just let go, and whatever goes, goes. (It might be interesting to learn your number and then listening in to the episode on checking your beliefs!) The Enneagram is a Tool! Since each type has a distinct path of growth, knowing your type can help you understand how to get back on track. It’s a great tool to have in your toolbox if you’re on the journey towards being your highest self! If you take a test, remember to explore the results and make sure it resonates with you. Learn more about the types, and be open to learning more about your own inner motivations. If your desire is to use the enneagram for self-care, you’ll want to do this in a loving way that works for you. Want more info? The Enneagram Institute has a great test for about $12; it has a lot of questions, so you do have to really sit down and take it like a true test. TrueSelf.io includes images on their free test, which makes it quick and easy. (It’s not quite as in depth, but it’s a great starting point!) You can always with Natasha as well – she’s on IG as @radiantlyflourish.

Today’s episode is all about snacking! As I sat down to record this podcast, I just happened to have been finishing up a snack myself. As an intuitive eater, I think it’s important to fuel my body whenever I need to. Sometimes that means full meals, and sometimes that means snacks! (There really isn’t a “wrong” approach here.) Quick note: I’m only accepting clients into my Quit Dieting for Good program through September! (Since I’m pregnant, I’m building in a bit of a maternity leave for myself.) I’d love to chat with you about how you can get started with intuitive eating today! Personalized support, group coaching calls, workshops, guided visualizations, 6 amazing modules, and more — I love the content in this program! The Mixed Messaging of Snacks There are SO many messages about snacking! And all those messages lead to questions. Is snacking acceptable? How many snacks should I (can I) eat in a day? Is snacking good for you? What’s the “best” or “right” kind of snack? If you’ve ever been on a diet, you know all about the different thoughts on this. From a resounding NO, to encouragements to eat many snacks a day, the advice is all over the place. Rather than looking for an answer “out there”, I’d like you to consider – Does snacking work well for you? For your body? For your emotions? Often intuitive eaters will find that the answer to those questions just depends. Some days larger meals might feel better. On other days, snacking might work better. In addition, seasons of life can change how you might answer those questions. As a pregnant lady, I find that the big meals I usually prefer just don’t work that well for me right now. So I’m eating smaller meals and more snacks to keep myself fueled throughout the day. Figuring Out Your Snacking Needs What are you currently doing when it comes to snacks? Do you have current beliefs about snacks? Most importantly, do those beliefs help you or hinder you? Often we believe that snacking has some connection to our weight. We either restrict and limit ourselves because we think snacking is bad… Or we eat lots of small meals and snacks because we’ve been told that’s the best way to lose weight. Instead of just blindly snacking (or not) because of hidden beliefs, I’d encourage you to dig a little deeper to get to the root of WHY you’re currently eating the way you’re eating. So often we get into habits and routines that aren’t truly about what’s best for our own bodies and lives. But what if you WANT a large meal? A big hearty salad, a full bowl of curry, or a large burrito that will fill you all the way up (as opposed to a bunch of smaller snacks), might feel really good for you and your body. (Listen in to the full episode to hear about one of my client’s “snack dinners”!) A Client’s Story A client of mine was eating small lunches and snacks during the day, and a full dinner in the evening. And by the time she got to dinner, she was inhaling her food! She told me about it, and shared she wanted to slow down and enjoy that meal. At first she thought it would help if we focused on eating mindfully. And we did do some great work with that! But then we realized that she had internalized this idea that snacking or grazing on really small meals all day was better for her than eating full meals. As a result, she was doing that….and then coming home and speed-eating her dinner! Rather than continue to eat snacks because of a hidden belief about them being “better”, she chose to listen to her own body. And for her, eating larger meals that filled her up felt much better! Slowing down and eating more mindfully is something she can enjoy doing when she knows she’s going to actually get full and feel restored after a meal. The snacking life just wasn’t cutting it! (Although she also knows she can always revisit that later — sometimes our needs change, and we get to change too!) Food Freedom Can be Real! In the last diet I ever did before I became an intuitive eater, I was fed the line about that diet really being a “lifestyle” and the “best way to eat”. The food freedom and lifestyle I was hoping for just didn’t work. I realized I was overeating during lunch, because I was really stressed out about staying full until dinner. Since I didn’t “get” to enjoy snacks, I had to eat an uncomfortable amount of food earlier in the day. That’s not great! When I know that I can eat snacks when needed, I can relax and allow myself to enjoy my meals. Whenever I’m full, I can stop, with the knowledge that I can eat more whenever I need to. If that’s not until dinner, great! If that’s in a few hours and then I need to refuel with a snack, no problem! True food freedom for me didn’t happen until I was able to freely eat in a way that feels good for my body and works in my life. That might mean big meals, small meals, snacking throughout the day, or not many snacks at all. It changes from day to day, and season to season. The choice I make about snacking aren’t “good” or “bad”. They aren’t rules for me to follow (or for you to copy)! They’re just ways of eating that are based on what works for me right now. There are No Rules + What does your schedule look like? + What would feel good for your body? + Are there foods you really like to eat? + What meals do you really enjoy? Based on your answers, keep those things on hand! I love to have apples and nut butter available, because I really enjoy those as fuel in my day. Play with what works with you. Pay attention to what meals or foods make you desire a snack pretty quickly. (If I eat cereal for breakfast, I feel a need for more fuel within 2 hours! If I eat something with protein, I can go quite a bit longer without needing anything else.) If I have a busy morning and won’t have time for a snack, I make sure to plan a breakfast that will hold me over for longer. Another thing to think about — there are no rules about what a “snack” is. You can define for yourself what food work as snacks, and what feels best as a full meal. Let Snacking Be Neutral Resist the urge to label snacking as “good” or “bad”! Instead, practice listening to your body and checking in throughout the day. Don’t be afraid to skip a snack you would normally eat….or to eat a snack you wouldn’t normally consider! One last thing to consider: Sometimes snacking is about our emotions. (No need to make this “bad” or “good” either!) If you think a lot of snacking might be tied to emotions, I’d love if you listened in to Episode 22, which is all about actually feeling your feelings! At the end of the day, there is no wrong way to go about snacking. My biggest advice is to regularly: + Check in with your snacking beliefs. + Think about your own schedule and needs. Experiment! + Prepare yourself with snack & foods you like, and eat them as needed.  

For this week’s interview I met with Sarah Berneche. We had an amazing conversation, and were able to really go deep on the layers of food restriction! No matter where you are in your journey, it’s always worth considered how restrictions might be popping up in your life! (Not too long ago, I shared about my own process of needing to let go of restrictions again as well!) Ready to Ditch the Guilt + Body Shame to Gain Confidence + Feel Free? Check out my newest workshop! It’s an hour long, available on-demand, and FREE! Meet Sarah! Sarah Berneche is an intuitive eating counselor and registered holistic nutritionist. She considers herself a nutrition therapist, and most of her clientele consists of women dealing with disordered eating and body image. She shares that in her early years, she had a “normal” relationship with food. Post-puberty, however, she began getting bullied for her new, larger body. At that point, she began to feel that she no longer wanted this body. Shortly after, she learned about the WW points system. This led her down the rabbit hole of diets. Sarah spent years trying to manage how she felt about her body by controlling it with food restrictions. Over the years, her diets morphed into disordered eating. In the midst of her unhealthy food relationships, she completed her dietary training and began working as a nutritionist. During a corporate nutrition training, someone asked if they were allowed to eat yogurt with fruit in the bottom. That question struck her — Sarah realized that pushing people to eat only certain “good” foods and to restrict themselves from the pleasure or joy of food wasn’t in line with her values. Healing Food Relationships As she studied and grew in her own understanding, Sarah learned more about intuitive eating, health at every size, and the body positive movement. Having healed her own food relationship, she became passionate about helping other women have the same experience. One thing Sarah notices is that many women want intuitive eating to be a clear journey with a specific destination. There is a desire to “arrive”! With intuitive eating, however, there are many phases to the journey. Rather than trying to finish the journey, it will likely feel better to enjoy each step along the way. Another important point: many women have a relationship with dieting built on years of practice. Transitioning to intuitive eating is a practice as well. You should plan to invest in it, just like you would with any new relationship! Along the way, you’ll likely notice that sometimes that old dieting relationships tries to get back into your life! That’s normal – and you have the ability to choose, each and every time, which relationship you would rather invest in for the long run! The Layers of Food Restrictions Even when you’ve been eating intuitively for years, you may find restrictions popping up in your life! Sarah shares that the layers of food restrictions can be like the 100 layer crepe cakes. Every time you peel one back, it seems like there is another one ready to take its place! You may notice this happening physically — whether that’s the temptations to calorie count, control portion sizes, or restrict specific items. At some point, we start to move into more mental and psychologic concerns as well. For example, being a “better person” if you eat clean or maintain a smaller size. We also tend to have a lot of fear around things like carbs, fat, or other foods we may have demonized during our dieting journey. Many women tend to think that if they stop dieting, their food will be different. Sarah notes that this is true, but it’s not the only change! You’ll be a different person too! Your dieting came about for a reason, often a much deeper reason than we tend to acknowledge. You may have been managing anxiety, stress, or old traumas with your previous restriction/binging cycles. You may have used dieting to bond or connect with other women or people you care about. Dieting may have helped you cope with feeling inadequate. When you STOP restricting, a lot can come up! Dieting Makes us Feel Safe Diets have served a purpose in our lives! Because of that, they have a certain amount of security attached. When we start intuitive eating and release diets, we need to reconsider the coping mechanisms and tools we use to allow ourselves to still feel safe. After addressing the physical food restrictions connected to her diets, Sarah had to dive deep on the emotional needs that she had been using diets to manage! From romantic relationships to personal connections to inadequacies and other core wounds — Sarah found that when she stopped restricting, she was faced with many old feelings and hurts she had never truly addressed. Dieting had never been about “just” losing weight. When we talk about food and body, we are never just talking about food and body. There are so many deep, core needs connected to what we eat! There are so many layers of food restriction that we’ll need to be willing to pass through! Life Gets Better Without Diets The diet industry creates a problem (making us feel inadequate and broken) and then offering a solution (start dieting!). In the process of ending that relationship, we get to start rebuilding our core beliefs about who we are. Intuitive eating allows us to peel back all of the layers and messaging and become our truest, most authentic selves. Sarah shares that the more she does this work, the fuller her life becomes. With less restriction, she experiences more abundance. She’s found herself more conscious of connections, wholeness, and gratitude in many areas of her life. Rather than trying to get to the smallest size (and then intending to treat herself well at that later point), she’s able to treasure and value herself today, just as she is. She’s also seen an increase in the strength of her friendships and connections. Intuitive eating has enabled her to open herself to body positivity, social justice, and more care and concern for others and for the world around us.

Recently some of my clients have been going through the process of grieving their dream body. I understand that process, because I’ve had to do it to! When you start a new diet, you usually have an idea about what you’re trying to create, right? And no matter what that looked like for you, the reality of intuitive eating (and saying NO to diets) usually means letting go of that dream. That’s hard, and it’s okay to notice and allow yourself to grieve what you’re releasing! Have you heard about my latest training? It’s called How to Ditch Food Guilt + Body Shame to Gain Confidence + Feel Free, and it is on-demand, FREE, and available now! You can learn more by clicking here! (And don’t miss the BONUS options for my Quit Dieting For Good Program!) Are Your Dreams Holding You Back? Sometimes we have dreams that feel amazing…but they hold us back from what we really want. For example, say you’ve had a dream of owning a second home for vacations. You might be working hard, saving your money, and even preparing to go home shopping! But if you dig a little deeper, you might realize that what you actually desire is to take more vacations. The concept of owning a vacation home was a placeholder for your true desire – taking the time to vacation. Once you realize that, you might take that second home off your vision board. Instead of working extra hours and saving all their extra money for that house, you might realize you could use more time off and invest in dream vacations right now. Maybe a time share would be a better fit for fulfilling your true dream. Maybe just giving yourself freedom to vacation now would allow you to live out your dreams in a way you never imagined. What Is the Dream Behind Your “Perfect” Body? Your dream body works the same way. You might have imagined the perfect number on the scale, all of your clothes fitting like a glove, or some other picture of what your dream body would mean to you. But in reality… Having that dream body often isn’t even about your physical body. Instead, the real dream is often about finding the perfect partner, achieving a certain fete, having a specific career, or feeling confident and comfortable. We tell ourselves that our dream body is going to be the catalyst for all of those things (and more!), but in reality….it’s not. The good news is, you DON’T need to change anything about your body to go after your real dreams. Your ideal partner, salary, career, and life can be lived in the body you inhabit right now – no changes (or dieting) required! Giving yourself permission to give up one dream is what allows you to embrace reality and experience joy right here and now, in the present. Giving Up On My Own Dream I’ve always dreamt of my children being a boy and a girl. One of each. I grew up with a brother, and it seemed perfect. Plus, I loved doing “girl” things with my mom – baking, drawing, crafts, and more! So when I had Cooper, I was super excited to have a boy. And when I got pregnant again, I was ready for a girl. My pregnancy seemed different, and I was mentally convinced I was having a girl. Since so many people seemed to also think it was going to be a girl, it felt like my dream was confirmed. I was so excited! And then we got the results back — it’s a boy! That was really, really hard for me. I had a beautiful dream for my future, and in one moment I suddenly realized that it’s not a dream that would ever come to be. No little girl to do girl things with in the kitchen, or get our nails done, or any of the other things I had pictured. (I know that we might have a boy we wants to do those things with me! But I also know that it’s okay to grieve the loss of what I had expected and hoped for.) Now that I’ve had a chance to adjust, I’m getting excited to think about having two little boys running around the house. Cooper will have another bother, and we get to bring another little baby into this world. There are so many people who want a baby, and of course I recognize our privilege in having children at all. I also want to be sensitive to those who may be grieving other dreams related to conception, fertility, or losing a child. No matter what your dream is, though, it’s okay to recognize it and allow yourself to grieve for everything that will never become a reality. Grieving Your Dream Body With intuitive eating, your body will settle into a set-point weight that is right for you. (After all, it’s based on your DNA!) However, your set-point weight may not be at all like your dream body. Many women are hoping that intuitive eating might be the answer that allows them to lose the weight and finally keep it off. And for many women, embracing intuitive eating DOES lead to losing some weight. However, it’s unlikely that your set-point is going to be as low as your “dream” weight. That’s where the first stage of grieving comes in: Denial. Often this means you still have a hope or desire that intuitive eating is going to naturally lead to having the weight you’ve been dreaming of. You’re not quite willing to release that dream body you’ve been working towards for years….even though you DO know you want to be done with diets! Eventually, you start to understand that the diet industry sold you a terrible dream to begin with. You realize your dream was never realistic or good for you in the first place. That brings us to the next stage: Anger. This comes when you start to realize that you’ve held yourself to unrealistic expectations. You might be angry at friends or family you encouraged you. You might be angry at an industry that took advantage of your hopes for years. And you might simply be angry at yourself. Eventually, you’ll end up in stage three: Bargaining. At this point, you start to think about dieting again. Maybe if you could diet with a new mindset, right? You could intuitive eat AND lose weight AND still get your dream body! Or so you think… Going back to dieting will not help you move forward in the long run. By avoiding the temptation, you can move forward more quickly. Unfortunately, however, there tends to be one more hard stage of grieving to pass through… The fourth stage is: Depression This tends to happen once you’ve been working through intuitive eating for a few months. At some point, you realize that your body intutively wants to be a different size than you had dreamt of. Often you find yourself asking if intuitive eating is even worth it. You might also start to realize how you used dieting to exert control in your life. What ever you were using diets to cover up (as a band-aid cure) starts to rear up. The bigger issues in your life, the issues dieting was helping you deal with, start to reveal themselves. This can be a hard stage! Not only are you releasing the ideal dream body you’ve expected, but you’re also coming face to face with other hard things in you’re life that you used dieting to avoid. You can do this! You can release that old dream body, you can accept and love yourself the way you are, and you can face your life without using diets as a form of control. Don’t forget to show yourself love and plenty of self-care as you pass through this stage! And finally, you’ll reach the fifth stage: Acceptance When you’re here, you start to accept that you have a body that wants to be a certain size. You are able to let it be the size it desires to be, because you realize how much you’ll GAIN by doing so! You can experience freedom, self-love, and body confidence as you begin to accept yourself and your body in ways you never have before. Finally, you understand that your dream body is what’s really getting in the way of your true desires. Rather than chasing after a fictional dream body that keeps you in a constant pattern of restricting, binging, and dieting, what would happen if you allowed yourself to grieve your dream body….and finally release it? You can!

This week’s amazing guest is Julie Newbry, the Intuitive Personal Trainer. As we discuss how to stop over-exercising, I hope you’re inspired to release exercise-related guilt and give your body grace and love! Also — I have a NEW offer for you! It’s a free on-demand training that walks you through how to ditch food guilt and body shame so you can gain confidence and feel free! You can register at www.caitlinball.com/training and get started today! The Start of Intuitive Movement Julie shares that she works with clients that are pursuing fitness without attempting to shrink their bodies or focus on weight loss. Her own journey with health started at a young age — She attended her first Weight Watchers meeting at age 10. From then on, Julie was constantly dieting. At age 16, she had a full blown eating disorder that she battled until she was 30. Even though shed remembers having a love for sports and playing as a child, she couldn’t remove them from the focus on aesthetics and weight loss that we so often pair with movement. In her early 30’s Julie’s own concept of her physical body started to change. She began to appreciate just how incredible it was, and how much it was capable of. Eventually this inspired her to segue into personal training. Sadly, her boss at the gym constantly pressured her to lose weight and reduce body fat. Even though she has been happy with the shape she was in, she started to slip back into the need to lose weight, which ultimately led back to disordered eating patterns. Exercising with Respect for Your Body So many women are used to exercising frequently, with the specific goal of shrinking their bodies. Movement for fun and joy, and movement that is kind, is almost unheard of. Julie notes that exercising to lose weight isn’t necessarily wrong…but it also isn’t helpful. Often when we force ourselves to work out in order to move the needle on scale, we get into a cycle of “never enough”. We either lose the weight, stop moving, and then regain the weight. Or, we guilt and shame ourselves into movement because we are so intent on seeking a certain outcome. Either way, we’re more likely to find ourselves aways demanding more of ourselves, rather than feeling grateful to our bodies for all they are doing. When you can start moving out of joy and kindness, however, you can start taking back your power. Exercise can become a way of showing yourself love. You’re much more likely to stick with it if you view it as a way to build yourself up and truly love yourself, rather than as a way to change your body. Many of Julie’s clients are exercise avoidant (not exercising much at all), and some are exercise dependent (over-exercising). She noted that many women who are exercise dependent have a lot of fear about what will happen to their bodies if they stop. She shares that, in reality, if you are maintaining a certain body size by severely restricting food or exercising for an extreme amount of time, you’re using control keep yourself smaller than you’re body naturally would choose to be. A huge part of her intuitive movement work is to help women release this internal fear and clarify their own values about who they want to be. Finding Joy in Movement When you can let go of the “have to’s” of movement, you get to start experiencing the joy of movement again! Julie stresses that you can give yourself permission to move in new, different ways – ways that might be fun or get you doing something you haven’t done before. Rather then get sucked into the need to have a certain type of equipment, or to trudge along on machines that make you miserable, you can choose to creatively explore types of movement that you might actually find enjoyable! Julie also points out that the exercise industry is heavily invested in profiting from program and plans. You have the right to question that! What is your intention in pursuing a certain program? Is a physical challenge you’re taking part in feeling more like a punishment, or celebration? Are you having fun when you move, or are you over-stressing your body? It can be so fun to push your body and see what it is capable of! It can also be painful and harsh, and the difference honestly comes from your own attitude and approach. By slowing down and really identifying why you’re moving and what you hope to gain from it (and when those gains don’t require your body to change sizes), you’ll likely find your approach to movement changing. Also, when and if you decide to stop over-exercising, you aren’t resigning yourself to a live on the couch. Instead, you’re making a choice to engage in strenuous, challenging activity because you like it….not because you’re trying to punish yourself. Food & Exerecise Your body has all sorts of awesome mechanisms that will resist an imbalance of working out and eating. Trying to live off of rice cakes and broth while playing the Tetris version of “how much can I eat” and “how much do I have to exercise in exchange” doesn’t create health. In fact, your body will naturally balance things out if you trust it with intuitive movement and eating. Leaning in to this requires you to let go of control! Julie shares that she had to leave her gym and go to therapy to deal with some of the stress of letting go. It is hard, especially when it’s been a way of life and a personal mindset for a long time! Now she knows that the best way for her to approach movement and exercise is to have self-compassion and to question what is true. She asks herself — Do I need to experience that kind of pain or discomfort to be a “good” trainer? Does that movement/program/plan honor my body and my needs? If I did “that”, would it come from a place of love? Fitness and health don’t have “a look”. Any size or shape of body can be healthy; the most important thing is that you are able to honor your own values and truth in your movement journey. Freeing Up Your Time Julie shares that she’s had several clients pick up new jobs, start volunteering, and go back to school with all the time they freed up by practicing intuitive movement! When you can stop over-exercising and release all the mental math, preoccupation, and effort you’ve been putting into exercise, weight loss, and food control, you have so much more freedom! And of course, you get to choose how you want to use your newfound energy, time, and freedom. One of the most profound changes in her own life has been family dinner. She says that being able to sit with her family and eat what they eat and have that time with them is a highlight of her day. Being able to model for her own children that women can eat rice and bread, women can enjoy their relationships with their bodies and food, and women can be FREE have been things that she has found to be personally transformative.   No matter where you are in your journey, you can make the choice to change things. You can love yourself the way you deserve to be loved. You can model the sort of relationship with food and exercise that you want your children to see. The power to create change is within your own hands. Don’t be afraid to release old patterns and embrace freedom!

Now that you know I’m in the 1st trimester of my pregnancy with Baby #2, I thought it would be fun to talk about it! (See the full announcement here!) If you’re wondering how intuitive eating works with a pregnancy, I’d love to share my experience. And if you’re thinking you’re interested in starting to eat intuitively, but you’ll wait until AFTER the baby, I’d love to share why it might be a really good idea to start now! (Or at least shed some light on why you don’t need to wait if you don’t want to!) I Didn’t Feel Bad About the Carbs I found out I was pregnant on the first day we sheltered in place. It happened to coincide with Cooper staying home from school sick, and then me getting his cold too. And then once the cold was gone, I got morning sickness! For me, that usually means I need to eat immediately when I get up, and usually my appetite is for carbs. Years ago, that might have been really stressful for me. In the past, I’ve had so many internal rules and regulations about eating carbs, and getting pregnant doesn’t change any of that mental chatter. I know that for me, dealing with the general bloat and nausea of pregnancy, plus fighting guilt and shame around carb intake, would have been extra overwhelming. Throughout my whole 1st trimester, I was so grateful that I no longer had a negative relationship with carbs. As I’ve changed my morning eating routine, it’s been fun to see Cooper get involved (he’s convinced he’s feeding the hungry baby in his tummy too), and it’s been so wonderful that I can engage in new food patterns with joy and freedom instead of stress and guilt. (Also, it just so happened that my early pregnancy carb-cravings coincided nicely with the sourdough craze, so I definitely got in on that too!) Body Freedom at ANY Size (Pregnancy Included!) This baby is so, so tiny… but I still feel so, so bloated. It doesn’t make my pants feel great, even early on in the pregnancy. But instead of assuming that I’m not eating right, I’ve been able to accept that my body is changing and growing. Bloating is inevitable, and there’s nothing to stress over! Also, this time around I’ve been a big fan of wearing maternity clothes as soon as you want. They are so comfortable, and they made for a growing and stretching body. Rather than try to force myself into my “regular” clothes that feel tight and uncomfortable, I’m wearing clothes that feel GOOD! Even if you don’t have a need for maternity wear… I like to advocate for my clients (pregnant or not) to buy clothes they like in a variety of sizes. If you have a few pairs of pants or nice tops in a size larger than usual, you can wear clothes you like even when you are a little bigger. That works whether you’re pregnant, have period bloating, have gained a few pounds, or just want the extra space. There’s never a reason that you have to force yourself into clothes that are simply too tight, too small, or too constricting. Trust Your Body For awhile in the 1st trimester, I could NOT cook. It just turned my stomach, and I couldn’t deal with it. Sometimes that meant eating broth with rice and noodles, because it’s all I could stomach. And then sometimes it meant freezer meals, or comfort foods like take out. I also struggled with the idea of veggies — so I didn’t push them for awhile. I trusted my body to tell me what she wanted and needed. And around 12 weeks in, I started craving salads and citrus-based things (like lemonade and key lime pie). Roasted veggies still don’t appeal to me, and that’s fine. My body will let me know what I want and need, and I’m listening in so I can honor whatever she shares with me. Intuitive eating allowed me to enjoy the cravings I had (and will continue having) while also caring for my body and needs. Sometimes I would eat something that made me NOT feel good. Hmm. I would just tuck that away as feedback that would come in handy next time I was making choices, and move on. No guilt, no shame! I also chose to celebrate the take out and freezer meals when that’s what my family needed. My husband and Cooper didn’t mind the change, and I chose not to feel guilty about it. Not feeling good is what it is. There’s no need to pile guilt on top of it! Intuitive eating during pregnancy gave me the grace to take care of myself in whatever way worked for me at the time. I didn’t have to beat myself up, or feel guilty for not being “enough”. Instead, I could be a really parent and wife who knew what they needed and took care of themself. What a gift, to both myself and my family! Prepare for Pregnancy Up & Downs About 10 week in I had a Corona virus scare. I got more sick than what I could excuse away as just the pregnancy, and my doctors ended up wanting me to have the test. Being sick and not knowing what it was (especially with Covid-19 always on the news) was so scary. It was also a reminder to be so grateful for this little baby and how much I already loved them. Ultimately, it was just a scare. After recovering from that, I had a week that made me think I was in the clear. Less morning sickness, more energy… And then things got hard again. If you’ve been pregnant before, you know how fast things can change with both your body and your feelings. After a few more weeks of morning sickness, things cleared up again. Around week 16 I started to actually feel good, and I’m loving that right now. Pregnancy is a series of ups and downs, and there is so much happening during the entire experience! For me, intuitive eating during pregnancy has enabled me to: + Maintain a positive body image, especially during those first stages of growth and bloating + Accept the changes that are happening with my body + Release food guilt and parenting guilt (all the guilt) because I understand there’s no reason for it, and I can choose to let it go + Listen to (and trust) my body as she tells me what she wants (and doesn’t want) – including food, rest, and any other needs that might come up   I’d love to hear from you too! Have you tried intuitive eating during pregnancy? Would you be open to it?  

Maria Simpson, who also goes by Body Love Boss, joined us this week to talk about body neutrality. We cover what body neutrality means, and where it fits into the body love conversation! We also talk about taking care of and respecting our bodies. I’m so excited to bring a fresh perspective and another awesome, personal story to the show. “Looking Like” a Personal Trainer As someone who always loved movement and exercise, personal training felt like a natural fit. And Maria feels that at the beginning of her career, she had a really healthy perspective. But after about 7 years as personal trainer, Maria reached a burn out phase that inspired her to take a break from that part of her life. As her career had continued to grow, she had started to feel more pressure to look like what she felt a personal trainer “should” look like. She lost weight, and as her body got leaner, she got more and more compliments. (Just last week I talked about the unintended consequences of body compliments!) Eventually, Maria was only eating the bare minimum, while also exercising an extreme amount of time. It didn’t take long for health symptoms start popping up. She kept pushing her body harder, and forcing herself to do more. Eventually, she came across a YouTube video made by someone with a very similar story to hers; that woman shared that she was dealing with a eating disorder. For the first time, Maria recognized that her exercise and eating habits were possible disordered. No More Mystery Symptoms As she started eating more and resting, her mystery symptoms started to disappear. And even though she loved being a trainer, Maria made the choice to stop training. Instead, she began to pour herself into the work of body love and acceptance. A huge part of her healing involved gaining weight. This part of the journey was when body neutrality became an important focal point for Maria. During her recover period, she gained 50 pounds in about two months. She felt an extreme amount of shame as she looked at a body she didn’t feel she recognized. As much as she wanted to hide, she also knew she needed to be able to embrace herself as she was. And early starting point? Identifying that gratitude was the opposite of fear and shame, and choosing to express gratitude for everything she could. While practicing that, she felt a small shift in the way she felt about her body. Those small shifts continued to grow as Maria chose to recognize that her worth was not attached to her size. She started recognizing negative thoughts about herself that would pop into her mind, and she’d practice replacing them with something else. A Growing Gratitude Practice This small steps continued to form into a gratitude practice. Maria started making lists of things she was thankful for about her body, and choosing to notice all the things her body was capable of. She found it allowed her to do and experience so much. And as she noticed and expressed gratitude, she found she could have a life filled with joy and happiness, no matter what her body looked like. This realization was freeing, and allowed Maria to accept that she was honestly healthier and happier at her new weight. Instead of forcing herself to follow a strict diet or exercise regimen that would allow her to be a certain size, she could release that control and enjoy the way her body naturally was. It felt really good, and served as a continual reminder that being happy and comfortable in your body was more important than anything else. Body Neutrality vs. Body Love It’s really hard to ask someone to suddenly love you. They need to meet you, get to know you, and gradually grow into love. Our bodies are the same. When we’ve had a difficult relationship with our body that has been marked by stress, tension, and even hatred, we can’t suddenly wake up and be genuinely in love with it. We have to allow ourselves to work towards that, and moving towards body neutrality is one way of doing that. Maria has found that focusing on what she most wants to be remembers for has helped her to shift her focus; instead of how she looks, she can focus on how she shows up and lives. In the process, she has slowly moved into the space of feeling neutral about her body, and from there she was able to begin to love her body. She doesn’t feel she loves her body every single minute of every single day. However, she feels that has the tools that enable her to get “unstuck” when she finds herself succumbing to her old thinking patterns. And if she’s feeling particularly negative, she doesn’t have to swing drastically back to love. Instead, she moves gently back to body neutrality, and from there, she can transition back into full body love. Body neutrality is an important ground that lets you experience gratitude and appreciation for yourself, exactly as you are.

Last week I announced some really fun personal news on Instagram – we’re expecting! I actually found out the very first day of quarantine, which was interesting. In some ways, it was a really great way of easing into a period of extra rest and a slower time at home. (Although it also meant being the only one caring for Cooper for the bulk of the day, which was exhausting in it’s own way!) It’s also meant I haven’t had to deal with body compliments of any kind (for some reason, people love to dole out compliments and advice for pregnant bodies), which has been kind of nice too. (Also, send your pregnancy + intuitive questions my way, because I’ll be doing an episode on that soon!) The Harmfulness of Body Compliments First things first: Don’t assume anything about anyone else. You might think that someone is super confident in their body, and that your comments about their body wouldn’t impact them. However, that’s simply not true. Everyone has their own experience with their body. They have hurts, hangups, and experiences you don’t know anything about. And just because you meant something as a compliment doesn’t mean it will be received as one. (Remember too that lots of women won’t tell you if you’re comment hurt them. They’ll nod, smile, and go home to grieve it alone.) Size and confidence are not related! Ultimately, you can’t know what impact your comment on someone else’s body will have, so it’s better to simply refrain from making them in them in the first place. Here are a few examples that illustrate what I’m talking about: Let’s say someone you know has lost weight. You notice, and immediately respond with phrases like, “Wow! You’re looking so great!”, or “You’ve lost weight! How did you do it?”. This can bring up all sorts of feelings. They may feel really happy and proud of themselves, since our society has really ingrained in us that losing weight is important. On the other hand, however, these comments can be upsetting. Someone might immediately realize that just as you notice their slimmer body, you also noticed their larger body. And your attention and compliments now drive home that you were noticing (and not complimenting) before. That can feel disheartening and upsetting! I had a client who naturally lost some weight after she started intuitive eating. Simply changing some habits based on what felt good for her body created some weight loss. Soon after, she started getting a lot of compliments. She was proud and happy; the validation felt great! Not long after, she started overeating again. When we dissected what was happening, we realized the compliments had put her into overdrive. Instead of the great habits she had been implementing to feel good in her day-to-day life, the body compliments made her start restricting and striving to lose more. All of the attention on her body made it hard for her to enjoy eating for her overall wellbeing; they brought her back to the dieting mentality of making choices that were really about weight loss. Think of someone you know that’s gained weight. You may know someone that you think is too thin, and that you think should gain some weight. And if you notice that they do gain weight, it can be tempting to offer body compliments. Things like, “You’re looking so healthy!”, which we of course mean as a way to make them feel good. When you make comments about someone looking “better” when they have more weight, it’s not helpful. It draws attention to their weight gain, which may be something that is really internally hard for that person to deal with. Too many body compliments about weight gain can also be discouraging; it highlights how much people notice and pay attention to your body and its size. In addition to having to get used to a new body size and the different way that clothes fit, now this person has to deal with your opinions and noticing also. Finally, let’s address compliments having anything to do with body size/shape and clothing. It’s so easy to someone looking great and start offering comments like, “That skirt is so slimming!”. That sort of compliment implies that the other person looks best when they are making an effort to slim themselves down. Wearing Spanx, or only wearing a certain style or cut of clothing, becomes a norm because they feel that it’s the only way they can look good. You would never want your friends to feel they “have” to limit themselves to wearing “slimming” clothing….but constantly commenting on the clothing that does diminish their size instills in them that they DO need to do that. Another back handed compliment is, “You’re so brave for wearing a bikini!”. The suggestion there is that someone doesn’t really look like the type of person usually seen in a bikini…and they are brave for being willing to reveal their less-than-perfect body. No one needs a compliment like that! At the end of the day, comments about other people’s bodies aren’t a great idea. Whether you’re directing it to them, or making the comment to someone else, no one is served by the constant attention on body size and shape. The best thing to do is to just NOT do it! A Personal, *Embarrasing*, Revelation Early in college, a friend of mine from high school sent me a picture of her and her roommate. Her roommate happened to be a model. I said out loud to MY roommate…. “Wow! I’m glad she’s not my roommate!” When I saw her, I had been thinking about how I would feel insecure if I was constantly beside someone who was so gorgeous. I was glad that I didn’t have that kind of pressure. My roommate was really hurt though, because I was implying that she wasn’t that beautiful. Later, I found out she even cried later. I felt terrible! In my mind, my roommate was beautiful, and I would have never believed that she had insecurities about that. But as I stated in the beginning… You don’t know what people struggle with when it comes to their bodies. My off the cuff comment that I didn’t even think of was extremely hurtful to someone I cared about. (Someone that I believed to beautiful….but made to feel less-than in a split second.) Responding to Body-Based Compliments Awareness + Change is the key here. Once you know better, you can do better! If you’re the one receiving the comments, I recommend acknowledging and pivoting. For example: “Thanks.” and move on. Or even, “Yes, I did lose weight.” and then immediately pivot. You can make it clear you’re not wanting to discuss your body or it’s changes. A more direct route? “Thanks, but my body is the least important thing about me, and I’d rather not talk about it.” If you’re asked for details about HOW you lost weight, you can share things like: “I’m focused on taking care of myself in ALL ways. And in doing so, I naturally lost/gained some weight.” You can talk about intuitive eating the way you talked about Paleo or MyFitness Pal the first time. Share what it’s all about, or why it’s working so well for you. Alternates to Body Compliments Try complimenting body energy/outlook/mindset. Notice someone’s positivity and confidence. Call out something specific someone did that was kind or caring. Notice someone’s dedication to their job, their family, or their hobbies. Compliment someone’s habits that seem to make their lives better. Notice someone’s sense of style and creativity, rather than the fit of their clothes. Call out someone for handling something really well. When we compliment people for who they are and what they’ve done (rather than how they look), we can shift the focus to something that really, truly matters. How powerful is that? Body compliments don’t give us that chance — so let’s STOP using them once and for all!

This week Chelsea Gross and I dive into the topic of healing from chronic illness (and healing in general) while intuitive eating. When you’re eating to deal with a chronic illness, you might have to do a bit of extra mindset work to maintain your own intuitive eating journey. Chelsea is SO open and honest about her story and her journey with healing, which makes this episode especially helpful. If you leave a podcast review in Apple Podcasts in May or June and send me a screen shot (email to caitlin@caitlinball.com or send it in my IG DMs) you’ll get a FREE group coaching call! It’s a small gift from me to you; the more reviews there are, the more women can benefit from the intuitive eating message! As a certified nutrition and mindset coach, Chelsea works 1-1 with women around the world (virtually, of course!) to make peace with their relationship with food, their bodies, and themselves. As someone who struggled with all those areas herself, Chelsea loves helping other women find healing and freedom. Chelsea’s Early Food Journey In middle and high school, Chelsea dealt with a lot of fear, anxiety, and even panic attacks. When she reached out to her mom and sister, they brushed it off. She internalized the idea that being emotional, being sensitive, and having fear was wrong — and that she needed to be fixed. Moving to college amped up her need to fit in, and she started to fixate on losing weight and “looking right” as a means of doing so. Like most women who decide to change their bodies, she started dieting and exercising. And at first, it seemed like it worked. She was getting a lot of attention and compliments, which felt good! She kept up the cycle of obsessing, restricting, and controlling as long as she could. Eventually, however, things fell apart. When she broke up with her first serious boyfriend, she started eating more to soothe her emotions. Other stressors that popped up through her college career had a similar effect, and by her senior year she had gained weight. She determined to lose it, and jumped into a cycle of restricting and binging, which later led to purging as well. Post-college, Chelsea took her struggles out to LA, where she pursued acting. The stigmas about weight, size, and diet continued to weigh on her in an industry notorious for pressuring women to control their food intake and maintain an “idealized” size. The Wake Up Call In 2014, Chelsea experienced a yoga injury and a car accident within a few days of each other. She started experiencing severe lower back pain, which sent her on a journey to all sorts of health practitioners. Nothing seemed to be working. She found herself with no passion, no purpose, and struggles that seemed to be completely overwhelming her entire life. With no joy to fuel her, Chelsea realized she was sinking into a black hole that she had to find a way out of. Via an online search, Chelsea found a nutrition program that sparked her interest. The connection between the physical body and the mind really intrigued her, and she made the decision to dive in. Throughout the course work, she became inspired to “make her mess her message”. She also gave up dieting and started looking at health as something holistic and positive. Rather than trying to “look” a certain way, she dedicated herself to “feeling” healthy, whatever that looked like for her body. Healing From Chronic Illness As she was working through all of this, Chelsea started experiencing symptoms in her abdomen and gut that were concerning. After many rounds with naturopaths and doctors (and so much testing!), she was diagnosed with Lyme’s disease. Eating in a certain way (or not eating certain foods) can be an effective tool for healing from chronic illness. It can make intuitive eating tricky, however, because there are so many tendencies to use restriction as a tool! Chelsea suggests that embarking on a healing diet CAN be helpful. And if you’ve been dealing with disordered eating or other chronic eating issues, it’s really common to be dealing with digestive and auto-immune disorders. Your system may be damaged, and you may need to do some reparative work. Something important to remember is that when you were dieting, restricting or elimination a certain food came from a place of punishing, hateful energy. That was about control, and a desire to change your body or yourself. Making a decision to restrict a food to decrease inflammation or help your body heal is a completely different mindset and motivation! If you’re attempting to heal from a chronic illness, creating a clear distinction that helps the restriction feel different is important. Intuitive eating is a way to honor your body and her needs. Making a choice to restrict a certain food from a place of love and respect IS intuitive! I am choosing… Rather than using “I can’t” language that makes you feel that you’re not “allowed” to eat a certain food, try using “I am choosing” language. When you make a choice to restrict a food for healing reasons, remind yourself that it IS a choice. You aren’t creating new rules, and you aren’t putting yourself in a position to start craving food you’ve been restricting and controlling. Instead, you’re being gentle and making choices that you can feel good about. Chelsea shares that now, she’s quite flexible in her food choices. She brings a mindset of choice into her food decisions, even when those choices are to restrict certain foods. Nothing is permanent, and she never 100% takes a food off the table as if she will never eat it again. However, she has done some very specific food protocols to help her body in its journey towards healing from chronic illness. There have been times (like during her candida cleanse) that didn’t work for her. She moved into them too soon, and her head wasn’t in the right place. She realized that happiness and flexibility were super important to her. In addition, she had to recognize the role of stress in her holistic health journey. If eating a restrictive diet meant to heal her physical body created too much stress and pressure mentally, she was losing out on a different kind of health. Being able to be in the moment, create space for her full life, and to incorporate joyful, positive practices ended up being vital. Chelsea realized that being happy was just as vital to her health as making food choices that empowered her. Create Room for Joy Overall, eating a certain way isn’t about doing it ALL the time…it’s about doing it most of the time. Give yourself room for joy, for travel, for date night — give yourself permission to live a full life, even in the midst of healing from a chronic illness. Remember to CHOOSe to allow foods you love. Make the choice to give yourself permission to enjoy each element of your life, including your food choices. And create those distinctions in your mind! When you are making food choices from a place of love and compassion, saying “no” doesn’t feel harsh or punitive. So remind yourself – you LOVE your body, and you’re taking care of her in way meant to protect and nourish her in the best way possible.  

A few months ago I went back to Step 1 of intuitive eating. What does that mean? Well, it involved the need to let go of restrictions AGAIN. This podcast feels important to share with you, because it’s my own personal journey. Maybe it will encourage you to get started, validate what you're already doing, or even reassure you that you’re not doing anything “wrong”. If you’re just getting started on your journey and want to know more about first steps, I’d love for you to join the Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge! It’s completely free, and provides and audio training and homework assignment every day. Looking for more? You’re invited to check out my signature course, Quit Dieting for Good! From a monthly membership, an amazing community, and awesome coaching calls — this is an amazing resource for women who know they are ready to quit dieting and let go of restrictions once and for all! Let Go of Restrictions Last July when I moved back to the US with my family, I had to make some adjustments. There were so many food options we hadn’t had access to, and so many things I wanted to try! After a few months I felt like was settled back in….and then I had another round of desire for foods that I hadn’t been able to have for awhile. In addition to increased access, there’s so much more convenience in the US as well! For example, things like takeout (which wasn’t super great and was really high priced) weren’t very common in Switzerland. So for me, a big move created a life change. And as a result, I had to relearn to let go of some restrictions. For you, it might be pregnancy, a new job, or some other life change. Don’t be afraid to check in with yourself and your beliefs and listen to your body. Maybe you’ve created “new” rules about food that you will or won’t eat, but it’s been awhile since you’ve really checked in with yourself. If you realized that eating a lot of bread doesn’t make you feel great, you may have decided you feel better not eating bread. That’s great! But after a while that can start to become a new restriction under the guise of intuitive eating. It’s okay to try bread again; a different kind, a different variety, a different quantity might actually be great! Allowing Food’s I Didn’t Even Love Moving back to the US inspired me to try all sorts of foods again! And rather than try to stifle those desires, I gave myself the freedom to do so. Even for foods that I was pretty sure I didn’t like, or had never really loved – I had freedom to try them out all over again. As I listened to my body and reflected on my experience, I realized that some of my initial food choices may have been fueled by my own reaction to diet culture. In Switzerland, there wasn’t nearly as much conversation about dieting, or pressure to be dieting. But back in the US….it was a whole different story! As an intuitive eating who was absolutely NOT dieting….I was pretty eager to eat my daily chocolate and consume whatever I wanted. Eventually, I realized I wasn’t checking in with my body quite as often. It was just a reminder to myself that intuitive eating is truly about your own body and needs. And I needed to remind myself that I am safe to eat anything, at any time. Just because I’m in a more diet-centric culture doesn’t mean I’m going to get pulled back into the dieting world! Fun (Restriction Free) Food Experiences I have been reminded how much I LOVE bagels with cream cheese. (“Everything” bagels with cream cheese, tomato, and red onion are my go-to order.) Our first few months back in the states, I was getting bagels multiple times a week. Now I eat them a few times a month. I still love them, but I also know I can eat them anytime, so there’s less urgency to consume them as frequently. American baked goods are another fun favorite! In Switzerland you can’t get baked goods (like chocolate chip cookies) very many places. And when I did have them, they just weren’t as good. So now that I’m back, I’ve enjoyed some phenomenal chocolate chip cookies, as well as amazing brownies! So good. Does my body prefer to run off baked goods alone? Nope! I’m not eating them at every meal, and I’m not even eating them nearly as much as when we first moved back. By giving myself free rein to experience them again, however, I’ve been able to find a balance that has felt really good for me and my body. (Funny enough, I thought I remembered loving those giant Costco muffins, but it turns out I actually don’t. Glad I gave myself permission to try them out though!) A few more fun ones? Deli sandwiches! My husband and I had both missed those, and we enjoyed quite a few in our first weeks back. And Mexican food! As Californians, we missed Mexican food a lot while we were in Europe. (My husband is still enjoying multiple burritos a week!) American burger joints are also so different here. They are way more affordable, and I definitely missed them! On a regular basis, I don’t love Hershey kisses. And in Switzerland, I developed quite a refined chocolate palette. (I love chocolate!) However, I’ve found that there is something about Hershey kisses in holiday desserts that is super nostalgic and fun. So even though I don’t necessarily love them from a taste perspective….I do love them for the memories they stir up for me. Nostalgia can be a wonderful reason to enjoy a certain kind of food. Not all of those foods made me feel great. I realized that some foods don’t work very well in my body in large quantities; balance is important! Most of those foods work in smaller quantities, and I enjoy them that way. Fullness Factors and Other Shifts When I was first starting intuitive eating, learning to let go of restrictions was a starting point. I didn’t have an entire foundation and years of practice under my belt yet! So even though I was back at Step 1…it wasn’t the same as starting over completely. I find myself reminding my clients of that truth sometimes! When you take some time to revisit earlier steps, you return with more of an understanding of how your body works. And that means even the first steps are experienced differently the second (or third) time around! For example, a big change for me was knowing my own fullness factor. Intuitive eating has really helped me know when my body has had enough of something. When I was on Step 1 for the first time, I didn’t really know that yet! But now, I do. I’m not coming off of a diet mindset that has me trying to eat a lot of something “bad” while promising to be “good” the next day. This time around, I was able to enjoy smaller amounts of anything (food can’t be bad or good, after all!) without finding myself feeling overfull. This time around I slowly tried all the foods, and had a lot of fun letting them all be allowed. I never really had that gross feeling of having gone all out and really binged or over-eaten on anything. If it had happened it would have been okay, but it didn’t. That’s probably because I really do know my body a lot better, and I was more tuned in to how things were making me feel, even as I was enjoying them. Letting Myself Have Freedom When we first came back, I definitely had some fun visiting Target and buying some cheap (but super cute!) clothes. The access and affordability were so different from what we had in Switzerland, and I enjoyed making purchases I couldn’t have made there. (Same with using Amazon Prime, which we didn’t have overseas!) But after a bit I wanted to return to my more sustainable, eco-friendly practices. Those are things I value, and I didn’t want to lose them just because it was easier to access more things here in the US. It’s not about “not allowing” myself; it’s about knowing what really matters to me and choosing to honor that. From baked goods, Target runs, nail salons, and Amazon — I’m giving myself permission to have (or try) anything. I trust myself to listen to my body, to honor my values, and to check in with my own belief systems. Going back to the first step of intuitive eating helped me remember how much freedom I have; all I have to do is choose to let go of restrictions! As I return to my regular routines of cooking more at home and eating more of my regular foods, I’ll continue to check in with myself (mentally, emotionally, and physically) to make sure I’m taking good care of my full self!

On this week’s show, I met with Paige Schmidt. She’s a fellow health coach and an intuitive eating counselor. Our conversation dug into the intuitive eating shaming we’ve both noticed lately. There’s been a bit of pressure in the online world recently to do intuitive eating “right”….even though that’s not what intuitive eating is about! Follow along to listen into Paige’s thoughts on intuitive eating shaming, as well as lean more about her story! (And if you don’t want to miss anything, please subscribe to the show! You’ll never miss another episode!) Meet Paige Schmidt Paige works with women on intuitive eating. She focuses a lot on helping women listen to their bodies AND feel good in their bodies. A huge part of her focus is “free and better”, not “free and worse”. That means feeling safe enough to know that you are empowered to make the choices that will enable you to feel your best. Leaving dieting behind and eating intuitively is a huge part of this empowerment! Paige shares that before her intuitive eating work, she had an intense relationship with calorie counting. She used (and deleted…and re-downloaded) the apps again and again. One moment she would get sick of it and swear she was done! BUT…then she would get sucked back in to needing to diet and calorie count. It was such a hard cycle to break! Eventually she got a glimpse of what it might look like to be free around food. Witnessing the food relationship of another woman who was really empowered in her choices (and who was NOT dieting), was so eye opening for Paige. Seeing someone make their coffee with real sugar, cook with real butter, and not be tied to calorie counts or food measurements inspired her to believe that food relationships could potentially be different. In a similar way, my experience living in Europe opened my own eyes to a really different way of thinking about foods! Rather than low-fat, fake food, diet-based approaches to health….I discovered a world where people were eating real food that they fully enjoyed! Finding people who eat and live differently than you can be a powerful catalyst for change. Getting Honest In her late teens, Paige eventually sat down with her parents and confessed that she was getting overwhelmed. She was partying and drinking. She was restricting food. And honestly, she didn’t want that anymore. AT this point, she realized that she needed to create some sort of change in her life. Sometime after, she started to feel free from her previous dieting lifestyle. She was tracking less, and feeling much more permission to eat in a way that felt good in her body. But then she reached a comfort threshold. She started to feel stressed about her lack of food related control. It seemed like she probably should be tracking calories or restricting food….right? Rather than getting sucked back into a cycle of dieting and control, Paige sought help! She started working with a counselor and naturopath, both of whom she found extremely helpful. A huge part of her transition while working with these professionals was a focus on real food. Rather than sugar free, “fake” foods, she realized she could consume the real deal (whole milk, butter, and so on) and feel really great! As her eating changed, she started blogging about eating real, whole foods. Years later when Paige learned about intuitive eating, she was thrilled to realize she was already on that track and really aligned with its principles. Intuitive Eating Shaming A few weeks ago, Paige came across a post online showing various food quantities. The graphic showed single/small portions of foods like ice cream and pizza, and then images of larger portions of those same foods. The image was labeled with “fake food freedom” and “true food freedom”. The post irked her! She realized that, depending where someone was in their journey, people were dealing with all sorts of food issues. Seeing a graphic like that and being made to feel that they “have” to allow themselves to eat larger portions in order to be “real” intuitive eaters isn’t helpful for healing. When Paige first started, she was really stressed out about consumption with foods like ice cream. Her solution? Focusing on creating a safe experience with that food! She bought fun colored bowls, and decided that when she wanted to enjoy ice cream, she was going to really sit down and enjoy ice cream. It could be a small portion, and that didn’t make it any less of a “true” intuitive experience. So many people who are just starting intuitive eating can easily start to question if they are doing it “right”. Self-doubt and questioning and shame don’t need to be a part of your intuitive eating journey! It is completely okay for you to create your own safe environment and food situation, and it is completely okay for your to tailor that situation to yourself. Feeling Safe Ultimately, intuitive eating doesn’t need to be attached to shame. Paige shares that although she isn’t dieting and doesn’t personally support dieting, she would never want anyone to feel ashamed of their eating choices when they are around her. We all have different bodies and needs. We’re all coming from different places in life. Our situations differ. Intuitive eating shaming is so unnecessary! At the end of the day, everyone has the choice to eat how they want to eat. The goal is that you feel empowered in the choices you are making for your own life. And one day, if you have questions about intuitive eating, you can absolutely ask her about it! Ultimately, you should be eating what you want in a way that feels really good for your own body. Give yourself the space you need to process your own body’s needs and desires. Whatever stage you are in is 100% fine! I shared that I often look up and make Paleo recipes. Why? Well, I eat meat, but tend to avoid dairy. I know my body really well, and I know dairy isn’t ideal for me. I’m not dieting; I’m serving my body’s needs in a way that feels really good for me. Feeling Powerless Paige shared a recent encounter in which a client was feeling really powerless in her intuitive eating journey. A lot of that feeling came from the pressure to do it “right”. It can feel like making changes or really strategizing about food choices can go against intuitive eating. We’ve both had that experience! There might be foods we don’t include in our diets….or foods that we eat even when we know they don’t make us physically feel great. Why? Because eating intuitively can look ALL sorts of different ways! Paige shared that often eats “Miracle Noodles” because they don’t have any lectin. A lot of people would perceive those noodles as a diet food….and might even be quick to try and shame her for eating something advertising itself as a 0 calorie pasta replacement. Personally, she LOVES their taste AND feels better when she eats them. She’s comfortable with the choice she’s making about noodles that feel right for her body. And that IS what intuitive eating is all about! Don’t let anyone judge you for your own intuitive eating choices! No shame necessary! Choosing to Eat Eating certain foods because a diet plan like Keto or Paleo tells you that you must isn’t the same as choosing to sample options from those types of plans because you WANT to. And remember… Everyone is in a different stage of their intuitive eating journey, and ALL intuitive eating is meant to be shame free. Paige shares that she’s at a point in her journey where she feels really natural about food choices. She can get ice cream and Miracle Noodles and feel great about both choices! She has no intuitive eating shame, and she feels really confident in whatever she puts into her cart. No matter where you are in YOUR journey….you’re not doing it “wrong”. Check your beliefs, listen to your body, and trust what she tells you.   Tune in to the full episode to hear Paige’s great self-care tips! She has some fun quarantine related thoughts on caring for yourself in a really positive way!

Stress about how you “should” look, or what you “should” be eating are not healthy! Ideally, you can care for yourself from a place of love and compassion. Sometimes that means tuning out the advice of others (family members or friends who are really self critical, who talk negatively about bodies, or who are constantly on the next trending diets, for example). In this week’s episode of the podcast, I dive into how to deal with dieters! Struggling with your relationship with your body or food? You’re invited to the free Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge! It’s four simple (but vital) steps that can get you started on your journey to self-care and true health! Check it out over on the site: www.caitlinball.com/challenge. Covid-19 Update I hope you’re doing well and staying healthy at home! Here in California, our shelter in place orders were just extended for another month. That’s a bit of a hard reality. In addition, I’m aware of multiple small businesses, like my co-working space, that have had to close their doors for good. If you’re struggling, at home or in business, please reach out to someone. You aren’t alone, and you will make it through this! At the end of the day, all you have is your health and your relationships. It’s a reminder to me that I do what I do because I LOVE helping people with their health. (And remember: that’s more than just physical. It also includes mental and emotional health.) When you’re truly healthy, you can feel good in your body. You aren’t constantly berating yourself, or putting yourself down. You get to feel at peace with yourself, and experience the sensation of self-love and acceptance. Something important to remember: a good relationship with yourself will spill over into good relationships with others that you love and care for. Building Your Intuitive Eating Confidence I’ve been asked about dealing with dieters a number of times. Here are the sorts of situations my clients and fellow intuitive eaters find themselves facing: + My mom is a dieter and she’s been talking about her success with the keto diet (and encouraging me to join!). + I have a friend doing a diet, and we usually diet together. She wants me to join her like usual! + My friends/family members/coworkers are implying that I “need” to lose weight to be healthy. Here’s my encouragement: The more confidence you get in practicing intuitive eating, the easier it will be to deal with dieters. When you’re first starting, it’s easy to get triggered by diet-based comments. You might even start to question if not dieting is really the right thing! Trust me: it is. My challenge to you is to keep doing the work, and to trust that you will reach a place where diets just don’t even appeal to you. Letting Go of Judgment When I first started intuitive eating, I was living in an average size body in Switzerland. Dieting is not that common in the country. And even if it was, I still wasn’t experiencing fat shaming or other pressure to lose weight. However, I have experienced pregnancy and childbirth. Becoming a mom was wonderful, but it also came with all sorts of new messaging and feedback from others! There were so many thoughts and opinions about everything I “should” be doing, as well as the “right” way to do everything. I was really sensitive about comments from other people…and I realized that that was a result of not having confidence. Having parented for a few years now, I’m much more confident! I don’t stress about what other people do; I assume their choices are connected to what works for them. And my choices are what work for me. Rather than feeling sensitive or experiencing shame, I simply parent the way that feels good for our family. I’m sure there are people out there with opinions, but that doesn’t bother me anymore. Your food journey is the same way! The more confidence you gain in your choice to eat intuitively, the less impact other people’s opinion will have. You’ll realize that other people’s feedback is often just a projection of what you’re judging about yourself. And when you gain more perspective and self-compassion, you judge yourself less and other people’s opinions don’t matter as much. 5 Tips For Dealing With Dieters Tell others what you are doing. When I was starting out, I told my best buddy (that I used to always diet with) and she did the same intuitive eating challenge I was doing! Even if the people in your life don’t join, at least they’ll understand a bit more about what you’re doing. Having a community that is working on intuitive eating together is really enjoyable; it can be a great way to bond with your friends on another level. And remember; even if they aren’t interested, you can find many other things to connect with each other over. Spark Conversations Leave out an intuitive eating book or materials. Share your favorite podcasts, or tag friends in an inspiring post on social media. This can be a really non-threatening way to engage people you care about, especially if you see each other often! You never know what will get someone curious. Pivot the Conversation You don’t have to engage with someone who is interested in discussing diets. If someone is persistently talking about dieting, you can acknowledge them…and then change the conversation. In the same way that you might pivot a conversation if you’re extended family is trying to dig into anything personal (your dating life, perhaps?), you can do that with dieting! If you’re stressed about this idea, try practicing! When you’re in conversation, see if you can pivot from the topic at hand to something new. It can be completely innocuous….one minute Aunt Peggy was talking about the best place to buy oranges, and the next you pivoted the whole group into a funny anecdote from work. It’s easier than you might think! Have the Hard Conversations Dealing with a close family member or loved one that always seems to bring up weight/diet matters? Often my clients share that planning a trip home is stressful because they can almost a guarantee that someone is going to start talking about bodies and offering suggestions on how to lose weight. That can be so hard! My suggestion? Have the difficult conversation with that person BEFORE the diet talk come up. For example, try sharing honestly how comments about your body or weight make you feel. You might also communicate that any comments about your body (including positives or negatives), aren’t helpful. Share what you’re working on with intuitive eating: your desire to love and accept your body as it is, your goal of removing restricting or binging on food. Loving and accepting your body as it is is really good for you! Let your loved one know how they can best support you. Give them ideas for OTHER topics of conversation: your work, your life, your hobbies. Request that they choose any topic other than weight or dieting. This might mean making a phone call before your trip. The people who care about you will usually respond well. They want you to feel supported and loved, after all! The key is to find a quiet moment, and to communicate honestly and gently. Be Blunt Sometimes we forget that this IS an option! Being blunt can be really uncomfortable, and I completely understand that! I do want you to understand that you have permission to share how someone else makes you feel. You are not obligated to hold back, or to conceal how you really feel. So remember: you have full permission to express how you feel when someone in your life tries to pressure you into dieting or losing weight. It might mean you simply say, “That’s really hurtful. I would never say those things to you, and I need you to stop talking to me that way.” Even if it’s hard, it can be exactly what needs to happen. When you are being hurt, you can absolutely stand up for yourself. It’s not right for anyone to treat you poorly or put you down, and you don’t have to tolerate it just to “keep the peace”. Be Confident in Your Decisions If you’re practicing intuitive eating, it’s because it’s something you chose for yourself. No one else’s opinion or feedback needs to sway you! Just like with parenting; the more you accept your own desires and release judgment, the easier it is to let other people’s opinions roll off your back. Intuitive eating is an amazing way to eat, live, and take care of yourself. You can absolutely have confidence in choosing this lifestyle for yourself. If you are looking for a bit more support, I’d love for you to check out my Quit Dieting for Good program. You’ll get the chance to connect with other amazing women who are going through the same journey, plus get access to coaching calls with me!

Sam Finkelstein is an anti-diet dietitian, and she joined us over on the podcast to discuss the idea that being “anti-diet” does not mean being “anti-health”. And honestly, if you don’t truly believe this, it’s really hard to make positive changes and let go of restrictions. Intuitive eating is much easier to embrace and practice when you understand this! Food Fixations Sam shares that what she remembers about dieting is being totally fixated on food. It seems whenever we diet, we get consumed by paying attention to all. things. food. From following the rules, dealing with our body crying out for more food, and stressing about instances where we might end up failing on our new diets…once we are engulfed in a dieting mindset, it’s hard to see past it! Once huge downside to this is that it’s super hard to live our lives in a balanced way when we are in the midst of dieting. And many people are constantly engaged in some form of diet! Food fixation goes hand-in-hand with stress and cycles of restricting/binging. It’s hard to be at your best (or even to enjoy your life) when this is where your mind is! That’s one reason why it’s so important to check your beliefs often. Dieting and disordered eating is really common in our culture. In fact, it’s become so common that it can be hard to spot. Sam shares that she often hears some version of, “Well, if that’s disordered, then isn’t everyone basically disordered?” when it comes to restricting food intake. Her answer? Yes! If your food patterns create cycles of restricting and binging, if you’re mental space is consumed with what you will eat, or what you already ate, or what you want to eat but won’t allow yourself… That is disordered. That’s not something to normalize, it’s something to recognize and address! Sam’s Anti-Diet Approach As she prepared for college, Sam initially applied for journalism programs. At the last minute, however, she took a year off and traveled. During that year, she decided she wanted to become a registered dietician. She feels this was connected to wanting to heal something within herself, which may be common for many people in the field. Since graduation, she worked in a variety of programs. Gradually, she’s settled into working specifically with people dealing with disordered eating. As a result, she currently works with lots of clients who are recovering from eating disorders and from chronic dieting. (Diet recovery might mean that you don’t fit the criteria of a full-blown eating disorder, but you’re struggling with your relationship with food and eating. Rather than waiting for things to escalate, Sam believes that we can, and should, start addressing those things early on.) Her nutrition approach is ant-diet, health at every size. It’s also based on intuitive eating! She finds that people who are first starting recovery can’t usually start with intuitive eating from the get go. It’s really hard to tune into your body’s signals when you’ve repressed them for a long time. That’s okay! Sam notes that you can start slow and build up, with intuitive eating as the eventual goal. For example, principles like — + Full permission to eat all foods, and + Honoring hunger when it does come up Are great ways to start moving towards an intuitive approach to food. Who Decides What “Health” Is? For a long time, Sam shares that Weight Watchers was the gold standard of weight loss. Their success rate? Around 5%! THAT is what “success” meant in the dieting industry. And their definition of “health” pretty much just meant losing weight. Eventually, Sam realized that traditional dietary methods weren’t working. She also recognized that health was a much bigger concept than she had ever imagined. Rather than envisioning it as only meaning weight loss, she realized it had the potential to be so much more. That’s one reason she loves to incorporate intuitive eating into her work. She shares that one common question she get’s asked is: But wouldn’t I just eat everything then? And intuitive eating IS about having permission to eat or do anything you want. As an intuitive eating provider, Sam promotes bodily autonomy. YOU get to do whatever you want for your body, and it’s not for anyone else to tell you. (With some eating disorder cases, sometimes there does need to be extra support in the beginning. But even then, she views her advice as a recommendation that clients can choose to follow if they wish.) However, she also wants to make it clear that intuitive eating is so much more than just eating whatever you want. It’s about listening to your body. This means tuning in, listening to hunger and fullness, and learning to say YES to what your body needs. She also wants to make people aware that health at every size practices and intuitive eating models achieve success! In fact, studies have shown that the positive impacts of these programs exist with or without weight loss. The size of your physical body does not have to change for you to be a success story! There is so much freedom in this idea, it’s worth repeating: The size of your physical body does NOT have to change for you to be a success story. Weight Cycling & Stigmas If you’re not familiar with the term, “weight cycling” is the phenomenon in which dieters lose weight, and then gain that weight back. Usually, the end weight is higher than the weight before the diet. This cycle continues over and over again. And guess what? Studies show that weight cycling has more links to chronic conditions that have previously been associated to weight. That means it’s not necessarily extra pounds creating negative conditions…it’s the diet culture stigma and the yo-yo dieting that are creating issues. Recently, I saw a post Sam created online talking about the idea that we don’t “owe” anyone anything when it comes to our health or the size of our bodies. Basically, you are in charge of your own body, and you know your body best. This is body autonomy. You do not owe it to anyone else to be “healthy”, especially when people are using “healthy” as a code word for weight loss. Because honestly, when people talk about health, they are all too often really talking about weight. There are many for whom it would be MORE healthy to stop exercising. To stop dieting. To stop experiencing shame or guilt about their body size. It is absolutely up to YOU to decide what your own big picture wellness looks like. What would it mean for you to be truly healthy? Would you be doing anything differently? What would you not be doing? If you create your own picture of wellness, it would include so much more than rules about what to eat or not eat, or how many minutes to work out. Let’s start to expand the idea of wellness! It can mean so much more than we currently let it mean. Wellness is Diet Culture Repackaged Saying that a diet is a “lifestyle” is just a repackaging of the same old diet culture. How can you tell them apart? Well, diet signs include: + Are you asked to rule out a certina food or food group? + Have certain foods been demonized or glorified? + Are you asked to ignore body cues, like hunger, as part of the “lifestyle”? If your answer is yes, then you’re probably dealing with a diet. Don’t be fooled into thinking that the word “wellness” automatically means something is going to be good for you. So what’s another way to wellness? Stop restricting. Why? Because when you’re restricting, there is something going on somewhere else in your eating. And the more we try to control ourselves and our eating, the more tension builds up. And eventually, that results in binging. We end up really out of balance as we swing between the two extremes, and it’s a never ending cycle. Our body’s respond to our rule-making by going on high alert and searching for food, and no matter how long we hold out, eventually we cave in and consume a massive quantity. Cue the guilt, the renewed pledge to stick to our restrictions, the building tension, and the eventually collapse. If you’ve dieted before, you know that cycle all too well! Putting Weight Loss on the Back Burner Intuitive eating can turn into your new diet if you aren’t aware of your tendency to start creating new rules! It’s important to put weight loss on the back burner when you approach this practice, but after a lifetime of dieting, that can be hard to do. Sam recommends that you exercise compassion for yourself as you learn how to listen to your body and respond to her needs. She also reminds her clients that this is a process that takes place over time. Sam points out that social messaging tends to feed us the message that when we do things right, we get smaller. When we do things wrong, we get larger. So if you’re new to intuitive eating and you’re not losing weight, or maybe you’re even gaining some weight, it’s easy to think that you are doing something wrong. Good news! You can’t fail when you practice listening to yourself and honoring your needs. It can be really hard to override those messages, so be patient with yourself. Keep in mind, there is a lot of social messaging and internalized feelings to undo! If you’re here, you’re showing up, and you’re taking steps to recover your partnership with your body. That means you are doing everything you need to do. Trust that things will come together; you don’t have to accomplish everything all at once. The work of intuitive eating is ongoing. Full recovery from eating disorders and disordered eating is possible. However, recovering doesn’t mean you’ll never have a negative thought about your body, or feel a need to restrict or binge a certain food. The thing that has changed is the way you address it within yourself. Remember: be gentle, be patient, and practice self-care.  

I’m on Day 39 of staying home! All things considered, we’re doing just fine. There have been good days and bad days, and we are doing our best to make the best of them. I’ve also been realizing that if you haven’t done it in awhile, this is a great time to check your beliefs. (I know I’ve been checking mine!) Check Your Beliefs This has been such a busy, strange time. Even though in some ways it’s been chaotic, there has also been more down time than normal. Most of us have lost our normal routines that include work/school/childcare/social lives, and it’s given us a chance to think in a new away about what we WANT to include in our lives. Based on my personal experience, this seems to be a great time to check in with your current life, thoughts, and beliefs. And maybe you’ll identify some areas you’d like to make changes, even once we go back out into the world! Let’s talk about them now so you can have an opportunity to examine them yourself. Belief #1 This one might be hard to admit to, but you might believe that being fat is bad. Even if you wouldn’t directly say those words, your actions and choices might reflect that it IS a belief you hold. In today’s culture, this is a really strong one for many women. When you say things like: I don’t want to gain weight, OR I’m most comfortable at ‘this’ size…. The belief you’re communicating is that being fat is bad. Sometimes we think fatness is unlovable, or that being fat will make us unworthy. You’ve been conditioned to believe that being fat is a bad thing. Long ago being fat was an admirable trait! It was a sign of wealth and privilege. So many health and body trends that relate to size and appearance come and go. From the rise of tanning beds and self-tanning products, to breast implants and booty growth hacks; there’s a lot of messaging about what’s “good” and what’s not when it comes to what’s desirable at the moment. These so-called body standards are just like fashion trends. They come and go, and when they are in, we get bombarded with messaging about how important they are. But in reality….they come and go all the time. Our body size is the same way. And since “thin is in” right now, we are being constantly told that that is the ideal we are supposed to live up to. And so we start to think… It’s bad to be fat. I highly recommend The Anti-Diet Book by Christy Harrison if you want to learn more about the history of dieting and body ideals. And just a few weeks ago, I interviewed Victoria Welsby about life as a self-proclaimed “Fierce Fatty”. We had a really great conversation about body fat and social stigma! She discusses how you might need to check your beliefs and see if you’re using fat phobic thought processes to fuel your intuitive eating journey. Try This: Write your beliefs down on paper. Then write some things that make the statement NOT true. For example: Belief: If I gain weight, I won’t be as healthy. Statements: Actually, when I weighted X amount I rarely ever got sick, and actually felt healthier than ever. There are always things that contradict your beliefs and thoughts. And if they aren’t serving you, they need to be dismantled! Belief #2 Being overweight is really bad for your health. For example, I recently read an article that claimed obese people are more likely to contract and die from the Corona Virus. Intrigued, I did some research. Apparently, this information is being misconstrued by media, and it’s not accurate. For example, many obese don’t get the same care as non-obese people, because of healthcare biases. Here’s the deal. I know thin and fat people who are unhealthy. And I know thin and fat people, and people of all the sizes in between, who ARE healthy. Your body has a natural set point. For some of us that, set point is below average, for others its above average, and for some it’s average. And it’s actually healthier to have your body stay at a consistent set point rather than to yo-yo up and down. When we diet, restrict, binge, and gain back weight…it’s really hard on our bodies! Another thing to remember: “health” includes both physical and mental health. Constantly stressing, obsessing, and worrying about food intake and numbers on the scale isn’t good for you at all. In the episode about whether intuitive eating is healthy, I talked a bit about the full definition of health. True health can’t only look at your body size, weight, or BMI. That is not the full picture! Belief #3 This is a food group belief! If you think a certain food group is “bad”….I’m here to tell you it’s not! Whether you hold these beliefs about sugar, carbs, fat, or something else, I want you to know that food is just food. Food is just food. (That’s worth saying again!) There is no food that is “good” or “bad”. You don’t need a cleanse, you don’t need keto, and you aren’t addicted to sugar. There is no need to completely restrict any food from your diet based on it being “bad”. Marketing and current trends may make us feel like a food isn’t good….but it’s just marketing. I recommend you find a trusted source for nutrition guidance. And remember: your own body counts as a trusted source! You can trust your body to let you know how much sugar (or anything else) you need. Once you allow those things, you’ll be fine. The issue comes when you restrict for a long time, and then finally allow yourself to have some. You might feel like you go a little crazy, because your body wants something that you haven’t allowed it to have in a long time. But once you normalize any food as something you can eat when your body desires it, you’ll find that you can eat an amount that is right for you. So what foods do you still label? Rather than trying to qualify anything as “good” or “bad”, what if you change your mindset so you just think of it all as feedback? If you drink too much alcohol and get a nasty hangover, the feedback is that that quantity of alcohol didn’t feel good. You can choose to use that feedback to adjust future actions if you choose. Not because you did something “bad”, but because you want to serve yourself and your body in the way that will feel the best. What Beliefs Don’t Serve You? Just like the back of your closet can fill up with clothes you forgot you had, the back of your mind can fill up with beliefs you don’t realize you have! But even if you aren’t always aware they are there, they do have an impact. Take some time today (or whenever you get a chance) to bring those beliefs to the surface. And once you do, you have the power to toss them out and get new ones! Get out what is no longer serving your. Your thoughts become your beliefs, and your beliefs become your thoughts. (What a crazy cycle!) The good news is, you have a lot more control of your thoughts than you think. And since it’s all intertwined, you can take back control by choosing to change your thoughts. If you need more support around checking in with and changing beliefs, I’d invite you to check out my Quit Dieting for Good course. Enrollment is open, and I start a new group on the first of every month. There are 6 modules, live coaching calls, a private FB support group, and more! The community is amazing. To get started, head over to www.caitlinball.com/apply. I talk to all applicants personally to make sure the program is a good fit, and I’d love to chat with you!