Podcasts about triad consulting group

In today's episode I speak with Elaine Lin Hering, author of Unlearning Silence.  We discuss her book and her mission to help individuals overcome being silenced. Elaine shares practical strategies for finding one's voice, handling difficult conversations, and creating spaces where everyone feels empowered to contribute. Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. If you enjoy the show, please leave a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating or review on Apple or YouTube and subscribe via the Website.

Elaine Lin Hering, USA Today bestselling author of Unlearning Silence, speaker, and facilitator joins me on this episode. Elaine works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict resolution. She holds B.A.s in Political Science and Music from the University of California Berkeley and a Juris Doctor from Harvard Law School. She's a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. Her list of clients includes American Express, Chevron, Google, Nike, Pixar, and many others. Topics we cover include unlearning silence, how we learn silence, how we silence ourselves and unintentionally silence others, finding our voice, four steps for learning how to speak up, and more. Get connected with Elaine: Website: https://elainelinhering.com/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elainelinhering/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elainelinhering/  Purchase a copy of Unlearning Silence: https://www.amazon.com/Unlearning-Silence-Speak-Unleash-Talent/dp/0593653602 Leave a 5-star review with a comment on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/business-minds-coffee-chat/id1539014324  Subscribe to my Business Builder Newsletter: https://bit.ly/32y0YxJ  Want to learn how you can work with me to gain more clarity, build a rock-solid foundation for your business, and achieve the results and success you deserve? Visit http://jayscherrbusinessconsulting.com/ and schedule a 1:1 discovery coaching call. Enjoy, thanks for listening, and please share with a friend!

Can you think of occasions where you wanted to say something, but couldn't? Perhaps you stopped yourself out of fear, or due to outside pressures. Having a seat at the table doesn't necessarily mean that your voice is welcome. A new book is aiming to examine the influence of silence and offer ways that we can begin to dismantle it to find our voices at home and work to shift the paradigm. In Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully author Elaine Lin Hering explores the difficulty that can come with speaking up, especially when there may be incentives to stay silent to avoid unwanted consequences. Hering discusses how we as a society have learned to be silent, how we have benefited from silence, and how we have silenced other people. She also offers advice on how we can choose another way,  creating new patterns, becoming more complete versions of ourselves, engaging more fully with our talents, and helping others do the same. Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. In her career, Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. Ruchika Tulshyan is the best-selling author of Inclusion on Purpose: An Intersectional Approach to Creating a Culture of Belonging at Work. Ruchika is also the founder of Candour, an inclusion strategy practice. A former international business journalist, Ruchika is a regular contributor to The New York Times and Harvard Business Review and a recognized media expert on inclusive leadership and workplace culture. She is working on her next book, Uncompete: Dismantling a Competition Mindset to Unlock Liberation, Opportunity, and Peace. Buy the Book Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully Third Place Books

How to find your voice when you need to be heard, learn when it's smart to choose silence, and communicate better with the people who matter most.Elaine Lin Hering is a former Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. She has served as the Advanced Training Director for the Harvard Mediation Program and a Managing Partner for Triad Consulting Group. She has worked with coal miners at BHP Billiton, micro-finance organizers in East Africa, mental health professionals in China, and senior leadership at the US Department of Commerce. She is the author of the forthcoming book Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully.In this episode we talk about:How we learn silence and self-editing How we often miscalculate the cost-benefit when it comes to speaking up or staying silentElaine's four steps to learn how to speak up and find your voiceHow we can unintentionally silence others, especially those closest to us, and what to do about it Related Episodes:How to Speak Clearly, Calmly, and Without Alienating People | Dan Clurman and Mudita NiskerHow to Call People In (Instead of Calling Them Out) | Loretta RossDo You Feel Like an Imposter? | Dr. Valerie Young (Co-Interviewed by Dan's Wife, Bianca!)Sign up for Dan's weekly newsletter hereFollow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTokTen Percent Happier online bookstoreSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelOur favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular EpisodesFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/elaine-lin-heringAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Elaine Lin Hering discusses with Ivan six things which should be better known. Elaine Lin Hering has been a lecturer at Harvard Law School and a Managing Partner at Triad Consulting Group. She has worked with a wide range of clients in Fortune 500 companies, including American Express, Capital One, Google, Merck, Nike, Shell and Pixar, as well as with government and non-profit organisations. Elaine "has all the ingredients to become the next Brené Brown” - Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, co-authors of NYT Bestseller, Difficult Conversations. Elaine's new book is Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent and Lead with Courage, available at https://www.waterstones.com/book/unlearning-silence/elaine-lin-hering/9781529900170. The real costs of AI https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/ais-climate-impact-goes-beyond-its-emissions/ Babble hypothesis of leadership https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2021/08/leaders-talk-more-babble-hypothesis/ No-knead pizza dough https://www.seriouseats.com/jim-laheys-no-knead-pizza-dough-recipe Social change ecosystems https://buildingmovement.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Ecosystem-Guide-April-2022.pdf Use of low power language is strategic https://www.yourpowerunleashed.org/blog/2023/5/21/womens-use-of-low-power-language-at-work-is-not-diminishing-but-very-strategic Forest-bathing is healthy https://time.com/5259602/japanese-forest-bathing/ This podcast is powered by ZenCast.fm

Elaine Lin Hering: Unlearning Silence Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer who helps people build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. She is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. She is the author of Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Your Talent, and Live More Fully. Those of us who have struggled to speak up have been told, “Just be more confident,” or, “Say this to get started.” As Elaine and I discuss in this conversation, there's a larger context at play…and great power for both leaders and the people they lead, in unlearning silence. Key Points Start with why. For change to actually happen, find something that matters more than the old behavior. What seems obvious to us isn't always obvious to others. Connecting the dots for others demonstrates the meaning you're making. Beginning a thought with, “From where I sit…” provides a entry point for what you need to say while also acknowledging different perspectives from others. Most people want to be helpful, but don't always know how. Tell them how they can be helpful in the moment. Resistance is part of the process of influencing others. While it doesn't feel good in the moment, it's often the catalyst for creating movement. Resources Mentioned Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Your Talent, and Live More Fully* by Elaine Lin Hering Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Speak Up, with Connson Locke (episode 546) End Imposter Syndrome in Your Organization, with Jodi-Ann Burey (episode 556) The Mindset Leaders Need to Address Burnout, with Christina Maslach (episode 608) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

We have all learned rules around when our voices should and should not be heard; when it's safe to speak up and moments when it's too costly to use our voices. Anyone who carries a subordinated identity, particularly women, experience the expectation of silence baked into corporate policies and practices, while it goes unnoticed or misunderstood by leaders. Elaine Lin Hering is here today to share wisdom from her book, Unlearning  Silence, and encourage us all to start our journey to speaking up. This week's episode 112 of How Women Inspire Podcast is about unlearning silence and promoting open communication! In this episode of How Women Inspire Podcast, Elaine Lin Hering is sharing the importance of agency and choice in communication and actionable steps you can take right now to start unlearning the versions of silence we have learned over time.Elaine Lin Hering works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross.  Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation.Some of the talking points Julie and Elaine go over in this episode include:Why encouraging someone to ‘just speak up' doesn't work.Recognizing systems, policies, and practices that silence marginalized voices.The four anchors of speaking up.Creating space for alternative methods of communication.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don't forget to follow, rate, and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about How Women Inspire at https://www.howwomenlead.com/podcast CONNECT WITH ELAINE LIN HERING:LinkedInWebsiteCONNECT WITH JULIE CASTRO ABRAMS:LinkedIn - JulieHow Women LeadHow Women InvestHow Women GiveInstagram - HWLLinkedIn - HWLFacebook - HWL

Unlearning silence isn't just about finding your voice; it's about recognizing the ways we've all been complicit in silencing others. And the surprising insights from a Harvard lecturer will have you rethinking the impact of silence in your world. Join the conversation to uncover the hidden ways we contribute to silence and discover how to foster inclusive communication. It's time to unlearn the silence that holds us back. Stay tuned for the unexpected wisdom that will leave you reevaluating your role in creating a more inclusive world.My special guest is Elaine Lin Hering.Elaine Lin Hering is a renowned facilitator, speaker, and writer with extensive experience in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Drawing from her background as a former managing partner of Triad Consulting Group and a lecturer at Harvard Law School, Elaine's expertise spans across various industries and continents, working with corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. Her personal journey as an immigrant from Taiwan to the United States adds a unique perspective to her work, diving deep into the impact of cultural differences on communication and strategies for inclusive leadership. With her compelling insights and vulnerability, Elaine's book, Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully, resonates with individuals seeking to navigate the complexities of silence and voice in personal and professional growth.In what ways are the often very well-intentioned people around me, such as my manager, who in their heart of hearts wants to support me, actually silencing me? - Elaine Lin HeringIn this episode, you will be able to:Embrace the power of inclusive communication and unlearn silence in professional environments.Enhance your communication and collaboration skills to foster a more inclusive work environment.Explore the impact of cultural differences on communication and how it influences team dynamics.Discover effective strategies for inclusive leadership and building stronger team dynamics.Understand the role of silence in personal and professional growth, and how it can positively impact your workplace interactions.Embrace the Power of Inclusive CommunicationInclusive communication in professional environments is essential for fostering a sense of belonging and diversity. By embracing diverse voices and perspectives, teams can collaborate more effectively and achieve better results. Creating a space where everyone feels heard and valued cultivates a positive work culture and promotes innovation.The resources mentioned in this episode are:Join the Difference Maker Community at www.patreon.com/aworldofdifference to access exclusive episodes and support the show for as little as $5 a month.Follow Lori Adams-Brown on Twitter @loriadbr and on Instagram @loriadamsbrown to stay connected and share your suggestions for future guests on the show.Check out Elaine Lin Hering's book Unlearning How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully to gain deeper insights into unlearning silence and fostering a more inclusive environment.Consider reaching out to Lori Adams-Brown to share your stories and experiences, as well as to suggest individuals who are making a difference and could be featured on the podcast.Explore the wisdom and advice shared by Elaine Lin Hering in the exclusive episode available in the Difference Maker Community, where she provides insights on self-care, resilience, and navigating challenging spaces.Being explicit doesn't mean that you have to be direct. Being explicit means, 'Oh, read the air. That's what is happening here. Can we name it?' - Elaine Lin HeringExplore Impact of Cultural DifferencesUnderstanding the impact of cultural differences on communication is crucial for creating inclusive work environments. By acknowledging and respecting diverse cultural backgrounds, teams can leverage unique perspectives and insights to drive innovation. Embracing cultural diversity fosters mutual understanding, strengthens relationships, and promotes a more inclusive and harmonious workplace.The key moments in this episode are:00:00:02 - Introduction to Unlearning Silence 00:01:50 - Elaine's Background and Immigrant Experience 00:05:02 - Defining Silence 08:03 - Internalized Messages and Reflective Habits 00:13:58 - Understanding Voice 00:15:03 - Understanding Different Communication Styles 00:17:34 - Impact of Organizational Silence 00:20:52 - The Real Cost of Speaking Up 00:23:59 - Encouraging Voice at the Table 00:28:57 - Unlearning Silence 00:29:58 - Unlearning Silence 00:31:14 - Three Levers of Voice 00:34:30 - Cross-Cultural Communication 00:39:38 - Role of Silence 00:45:25 - The Power of Unlearning 00:46:29 - The Impact of Silence 00:48:04 - Personal Stories of Silencing 00:49:49 - Co-Creating the Podcast 00:52:26 - Self-Compassion and Making a Difference The question is not, am I a good or bad person for doing that, but am I having the impact that I want? Am I aligned in how I think I'm showing up and how I'm actually showing up? - Elaine Lin HeringEnhance Communication and Collaboration Skills Improving communication and collaboration skills is key to overcoming challenges related to silence and voice in the workplace. By honing these skills, individuals can navigate cultural differences, build stronger relationships, and work together more productively. Effective communication lays the foundation for successful teamwork and organizational growth.Timestamped summary of this episode:00:00:02 - Introduction to Unlearning Silence Lori introduces the podcast and guest Elaine Lynn Herring, highlighting her impactful book "Unlearning How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully". Elaine's personal background and professional experience are mentioned, setting the stage for the conversation.00:01:50 - Elaine's Background and Immigrant Experience Elaine shares her immigrant background from Taiwan to the United States, highlighting the cultural and societal influences that shaped her relationship with silence. The impact of patriarchal culture and the Christian church on her upbringing is discussed.00:05:02 - Defining Silence Elaine provides a nuanced definition of silence, distinguishing between the value of reflective silence and the detrimental impact of silencing oneself in communication and relationships. The societal, cultural, and personal factors contributing to silence are explored.08:03 - Internalized Messages and Reflective Habits Elaine reflects on the messages and reflective habits she internalized about speaking and being heard, both personally and professionally. The challenges of navigating individualistic and collectivist societies, as well as the impact of cultural, gender, and societal norms on voice and silence, are discussed.00:13:58 - Understanding Voice Elaine emphasizes that voice extends beyond verbal communication, encompassing how individuals move through the world and express their unique perspectives. The importance of embracing diverse communication styles and perspectives for fostering innovation and inclusivity in teams and organizations is highlighted.00:15:03 - Understanding Different Communication Styles Elaine discusses how individuals process information differently and how communication flows can be designed to accommodate different styles, allowing for all voices to be heard.00:17:34 - Impact of Organizational Silence Elaine shares her experience of feeling silenced in a previous hostile work environment and discusses the societal and systemic factors that contribute to organizational silence.00:20:52 - The Real Cost of Speaking Up Elaine delves into the real costs of speaking up, including the impact on mental and emotional health, and the societal phenomena of collective silence.00:23:59 - Encouraging Voice at the Table Elaine offers practical strategies for managers and parents to encourage people to bring their voices to the table, including designing communication patterns, using standard questions, and listening across differences.00:28:57 - Unlearning Silence Elaine emphasizes the importance of being cognizant of the role that silence plays in our interactions, and the ongoing journey of unlearning silence in order to create space for all voices to be heard.00:29:58 - Unlearning Silence Elaine and Lori discuss the importance of unlearning silence and recognize the value of speaking up. They emphasize the need for individuals to be aware of their unique perspectives and to contribute to substance, relationship, and process in conversations.00:31:14 - Three Levers of Voice Elaine explains the concept of the three levers of voice, which are substance, relationship, and process. She highlights the impact of these levers on communication patterns and the importance of recognizing different perspectives in discussions.00:34:30 - Cross-Cultural Communication Elaine and Lori delve into the topic of cross-cultural communication, referencing Erin Meyer's "The Culture Map." They discuss the differences in communication styles across cultures and the need to explicitly address and understand these differences in diverse settings.00:39:38 - Role of Silence Elaine offers a call to action for individuals in positions of power to observe the role of silence in their teams. She emphasizes the importance of being neutral and honest in assessing the impact of silence and encourages readers to read her book for further guidance on recognizing and addressing silence in their environments.00:45:25 - The Power of Unlearning Lori talks about how much she learned from Elaine's book, emphasizing the title "unlearning" as a process. She expresses excitement for the journey of unlearning and belonging.00:46:29 - The Impact of Silence Lori reflects on the impact of silence in different spaces, including faith communities, corporate environments, and journalism. She highlights the importance of knowing when to speak and when to be silent.00:48:04 - Personal Stories of Silencing Lori shares how listeners have reached out to her with their stories of being silenced in their workplaces or faith communities. She expresses gratitude for being a space where they can share their experiences.00:49:49 - Co-Creating the Podcast Lori encourages listeners to reach out to her with suggestions for guests and expresses the impact of the community in deepening the conversations. She also invites listeners to join the difference maker community on Patreon.00:52:26 - Self-Compassion and Making a Difference Lori ends the podcast with a message of self-compassion and kindness, emphasizing the importance of each person's voice and the value they bring to the world. She encourages listeners to keep making a difference.https://www.facebook.com/A-World-of-Difference-613933132591673/https://www.linkedin.com/company/aworldofdifference/https://www.aworldofdifferencepodcast.comhttps://www.youtube.com/@aworldofdifferencehttps://www.twitter.com/@awodpod

Unlearning silence isn't just about finding your voice; it's about recognizing the ways we've all been complicit in silencing others. And the surprising insights from a Harvard lecturer will have you rethinking the impact of silence in your world. Join the conversation to uncover the hidden ways we contribute to silence and discover how to foster inclusive communication. It's time to unlearn the silence that holds us back. Stay tuned for the unexpected wisdom that will leave you reevaluating your role in creating a more inclusive world.My special guest is Elaine Lin Hering.Elaine Lin Hering is a renowned facilitator, speaker, and writer with extensive experience in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Drawing from her background as a former managing partner of Triad Consulting Group and a lecturer at Harvard Law School, Elaine's expertise spans across various industries and continents, working with corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. Her personal journey as an immigrant from Taiwan to the United States adds a unique perspective to her work, diving deep into the impact of cultural differences on communication and strategies for inclusive leadership. With her compelling insights and vulnerability, Elaine's book, Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully, resonates with individuals seeking to navigate the complexities of silence and voice in personal and professional growth.In what ways are the often very well-intentioned people around me, such as my manager, who in their heart of hearts wants to support me, actually silencing me? - Elaine Lin HeringIn this episode, you will be able to:Embrace the power of inclusive communication and unlearn silence in professional environments.Enhance your communication and collaboration skills to foster a more inclusive work environment.Explore the impact of cultural differences on communication and how it influences team dynamics.Discover effective strategies for inclusive leadership and building stronger team dynamics.Understand the role of silence in personal and professional growth, and how it can positively impact your workplace interactions.Embrace the Power of Inclusive CommunicationInclusive communication in professional environments is essential for fostering a sense of belonging and diversity. By embracing diverse voices and perspectives, teams can collaborate more effectively and achieve better results. Creating a space where everyone feels heard and valued cultivates a positive work culture and promotes innovation.The resources mentioned in this episode are:Join the Difference Maker Community at www.patreon.com/aworldofdifference to access exclusive episodes and support the show for as little as $5 a month.Follow Lori Adams-Brown on Twitter @loriadbr and on Instagram @loriadamsbrown to stay connected and share your suggestions for future guests on the show.Check out Elaine Lin Hering's book Unlearning How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully to gain deeper insights into unlearning silence and fostering a more inclusive environment.Consider reaching out to Lori Adams-Brown to share your stories and experiences, as well as to suggest individuals who are making a difference and could be featured on the podcast.Explore the wisdom and advice shared by Elaine Lin Hering in the exclusive episode available in the Difference Maker Community, where she provides insights on self-care, resilience, and navigating challenging spaces.Being explicit doesn't mean that you have to be direct. Being explicit means, 'Oh, read the air. That's what is happening here. Can we name it?' - Elaine Lin HeringExplore Impact of Cultural DifferencesUnderstanding the impact of cultural differences on communication is crucial for creating inclusive work environments. By acknowledging and respecting diverse cultural backgrounds, teams can leverage unique perspectives and insights to drive innovation. Embracing cultural diversity fosters mutual understanding, strengthens relationships, and promotes a more inclusive and harmonious workplace.The key moments in this episode are:00:00:02 - Introduction to Unlearning Silence 00:01:50 - Elaine's Background and Immigrant Experience 00:05:02 - Defining Silence 08:03 - Internalized Messages and Reflective Habits 00:13:58 - Understanding Voice 00:15:03 - Understanding Different Communication Styles 00:17:34 - Impact of Organizational Silence 00:20:52 - The Real Cost of Speaking Up 00:23:59 - Encouraging Voice at the Table 00:28:57 - Unlearning Silence 00:29:58 - Unlearning Silence 00:31:14 - Three Levers of Voice 00:34:30 - Cross-Cultural Communication 00:39:38 - Role of Silence 00:45:25 - The Power of Unlearning 00:46:29 - The Impact of Silence 00:48:04 - Personal Stories of Silencing 00:49:49 - Co-Creating the Podcast 00:52:26 - Self-Compassion and Making a Difference The question is not, am I a good or bad person for doing that, but am I having the impact that I want? Am I aligned in how I think I'm showing up and how I'm actually showing up? - Elaine Lin HeringEnhance Communication and Collaboration Skills Improving communication and collaboration skills is key to overcoming challenges related to silence and voice in the workplace. By honing these skills, individuals can navigate cultural differences, build stronger relationships, and work together more productively. Effective communication lays the foundation for successful teamwork and organizational growth.Timestamped summary of this episode:00:00:02 - Introduction to Unlearning Silence Lori introduces the podcast and guest Elaine Lynn Herring, highlighting her impactful book "Unlearning How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully". Elaine's personal background and professional experience are mentioned, setting the stage for the conversation.00:01:50 - Elaine's Background and Immigrant Experience Elaine shares her immigrant background from Taiwan to the United States, highlighting the cultural and societal influences that shaped her relationship with silence. The impact of patriarchal culture and the Christian church on her upbringing is discussed.00:05:02 - Defining Silence Elaine provides a nuanced definition of silence, distinguishing between the value of reflective silence and the detrimental impact of silencing oneself in communication and relationships. The societal, cultural, and personal factors contributing to silence are explored.08:03 - Internalized Messages and Reflective Habits Elaine reflects on the messages and reflective habits she internalized about speaking and being heard, both personally and professionally. The challenges of navigating individualistic and collectivist societies, as well as the impact of cultural, gender, and societal norms on voice and silence, are discussed.00:13:58 - Understanding Voice Elaine emphasizes that voice extends beyond verbal communication, encompassing how individuals move through the world and express their unique perspectives. The importance of embracing diverse communication styles and perspectives for fostering innovation and inclusivity in teams and organizations is highlighted.00:15:03 - Understanding Different Communication Styles Elaine discusses how individuals process information differently and how communication flows can be designed to accommodate different styles, allowing for all voices to be heard.00:17:34 - Impact of Organizational Silence Elaine shares her experience of feeling silenced in a previous hostile work environment and discusses the societal and systemic factors that contribute to organizational silence.00:20:52 - The Real Cost of Speaking Up Elaine delves into the real costs of speaking up, including the impact on mental and emotional health, and the societal phenomena of collective silence.00:23:59 - Encouraging Voice at the Table Elaine offers practical strategies for managers and parents to encourage people to bring their voices to the table, including designing communication patterns, using standard questions, and listening across differences.00:28:57 - Unlearning Silence Elaine emphasizes the importance of being cognizant of the role that silence plays in our interactions, and the ongoing journey of unlearning silence in order to create space for all voices to be heard.00:29:58 - Unlearning Silence Elaine and Lori discuss the importance of unlearning silence and recognize the value of speaking up. They emphasize the need for individuals to be aware of their unique perspectives and to contribute to substance, relationship, and process in conversations.00:31:14 - Three Levers of Voice Elaine explains the concept of the three levers of voice, which are substance, relationship, and process. She highlights the impact of these levers on communication patterns and the importance of recognizing different perspectives in discussions.00:34:30 - Cross-Cultural Communication Elaine and Lori delve into the topic of cross-cultural communication, referencing Erin Meyer's "The Culture Map." They discuss the differences in communication styles across cultures and the need to explicitly address and understand these differences in diverse settings.00:39:38 - Role of Silence Elaine offers a call to action for individuals in positions of power to observe the role of silence in their teams. She emphasizes the importance of being neutral and honest in assessing the impact of silence and encourages readers to read her book for further guidance on recognizing and addressing silence in their environments.00:45:25 - The Power of Unlearning Lori talks about how much she learned from Elaine's book, emphasizing the title "unlearning" as a process. She expresses excitement for the journey of unlearning and belonging.00:46:29 - The Impact of Silence Lori reflects on the impact of silence in different spaces, including faith communities, corporate environments, and journalism. She highlights the importance of knowing when to speak and when to be silent.00:48:04 - Personal Stories of Silencing Lori shares how listeners have reached out to her with their stories of being silenced in their workplaces or faith communities. She expresses gratitude for being a space where they can share their experiences.00:49:49 - Co-Creating the Podcast Lori encourages listeners to reach out to her with suggestions for guests and expresses the impact of the community in deepening the conversations. She also invites listeners to join the difference maker community on Patreon.00:52:26 - Self-Compassion and Making a Difference Lori ends the podcast with a message of self-compassion and kindness, emphasizing the importance of each person's voice and the value they bring to the world. She encourages listeners to keep making a difference.https://www.facebook.com/A-World-of-Difference-613933132591673/https://www.linkedin.com/company/aworldofdifference/https://www.aworldofdifferencepodcast.comhttps://www.youtube.com/@aworldofdifferencehttps://www.twitter.com/@awodpod

Kelly talks to Elaine Lin Hering, a former managing partner of Triad Consulting Group and a lecturer at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. Her new book is called “Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully. “Silence is a survival strategy.”  “Getting people to share what […]

In this podcast episode, host Jim Schleckser speaks with guest, Sheila Heen, who is an expert in difficult conversations and feedback. Heen co-founded the Triad Consulting Group and has extensive experience in negotiation, including at Harvard Law School. She discusses her journey into this field and the importance of understanding emotions in communication. Heen emphasizes the need to go beyond surface conversations and delve into the underlying thoughts and feelings in difficult interactions. She introduces three internal conversations: the "what happened" conversation, focused on narratives about past, present, and future events; the emotional conversation, addressing how individuals deal with their feelings; and the identity conversation, concerning what the situation reflects about one's self-image. The discussion highlights the importance of shifting from blaming individuals to understanding contributions to problems within a system. Heen suggests focusing on learning from mistakes rather than assigning blame, fostering a culture where feedback is seen as an opportunity for growth. The episode underscores the significance of systems thinking in addressing organizational issues and promoting effective communication and accountability among team members.

Once-upon-a-time, there was the “Silent Generation” - the self-sacrificing generation of WW2 vets who won the war and built America into a Cold War superpower. But Elaine Lin Hering, the author of UNLEARNING SILENCE, isn't sold on this stoically self-sacrificing generation. Rather than silence, she believes that speaking our minds, both at work and at home, will unleash our talent and enable us to live more fully. Speak up, she says, and unleash your inner Ariana Huffington or Elon Musk. What could possibly go wrong?Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation.Named as one of the "100 most connected men" by GQ magazine, Andrew Keen is amongst the world's best known broadcasters and commentators. In addition to presenting KEEN ON, he is the host of the long-running How To Fix Democracy show. He is also the author of four prescient books about digital technology: CULT OF THE AMATEUR, DIGITAL VERTIGO, THE INTERNET IS NOT THE ANSWER and HOW TO FIX THE FUTURE. Andrew lives in San Francisco, is married to Cassandra Knight, Google's VP of Litigation & Discovery, and has two grown children.Keen On is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit keenon.substack.com/subscribe

Join us on Wednesday, March 13 @ 6pm EST for an exciting conversation with Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group, Debbie Goldstein as she shares her work in conflict and communication. Debbie teaches negotiation as a faculty member at Harvard Law School and Harvard Graduate School of Education. She has also taught at Tufts University School of Medicine and was an adjunct professor at Georgetown University Law Center for many years. Her work often takes her internationally: to Dubai, where she worked with government leaders; to Ethiopia, where she worked with the Members of Parliament; and to Cyprus, where she taught public policy students from across the globe. Her varied clients include Merck, Chanel, Brigham and Women's Hospital, Capital One, Barclay's, Honda, Standard Bank, Shell, Boeing, General Mills, MetLife, PricewaterhouseCoopers, Citigroup, Prudential, and Proctor & Gamble. She coaches senior executives through difficult decision-making and managing critical relationships, and has helped mediate family business disputes. In the public sector, she founded and ran a free legal aid clinic called LINC (Legal Initiative for Children) for the patients at Massachusetts General Hospital's Chelsea outpost. She is currently on the Board of Directors of WBUR and Income Research + Management. She has been a featured guest on NPR, and her writing has appeared in the Boston Globe Magazine, the Management Information Exchange Journal, and the Harvard Business Review. Debbie is a graduate of Williams College and Boston College Law School. After college, Debbie lived in Chicago chasing (and catching) her dream of becoming a jazz vocalist. Debbie can be reached at goldstein@diffcon.com.

Nearly every kind of feedback — whether you agree with it or not — can be used to help you grow. Sheila Heen knows this well. As the founder of Triad Consulting Group, professor of practice at Harvard Law School, and the co-author of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well and Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, Sheila has spent nearly 30 years helping executive teams across the world work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together. In this episode of The Game Changing Attorney Podcast, Sheila and Michael Mogill discuss: The underlying structure and challenge of every difficult conversation The different types of feedback leaders can give — and what actually works How to raise tough issues and have productive conversations ---- Show Notes: 07:34 – The single most valuable skill you can have 14:57 – Defining difficult conversations 17:58 – How to navigate a tough talk 20:57 – Not everything is either/or 23:22 – Starting difficult conversations with a third story 29:35 – The 3 types of feedback 34:24 – Navigating sensitivity 38:44 – Front seat leader, back seat feedback 42:10 – What being a game changer means to Sheila Heen ---- Links & Resources Triad Consulting Group Harvard Law School Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Occidental College The Harvard Negotiation Project Bruce Patton Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck Getting It Done by Roger Fisher. John Richardson, and Alan Sharp Tesla The Game Changing Attorney by Michael Mogill ---- Listening to this episode but want to watch it? Check it out on Spotify.  Do you love this podcast and want to see more game changing content? Subscribe to our YouTube channel. ---- Past guests on The Game Changing Attorney Podcast include David Goggins, John Morgan, Alex Hormozi, Randi McGinn, Kim Scott, Chris Voss, Kevin O'Leary, Laura Wasser, John Maxwell, Mark Lanier, Robert Greene, and many more. ---- If you enjoyed this episode, you may also like: #162 Kim Scott – Radical Candor: How to Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity #166 John Maxwell #217 AMMA  – The Key to Clarity in Business

Do you feel heard? Do you know how to truly use your voice and speak up? Or are you so used to being silenced that you stop your thoughts before the words can ever even reach your tongue? Fearing the consequence of speaking up after too many instances of being punished for daring to take up space and speak. If this sounds like you, that ends today.  Today's guest Elaine Lin Hering, the author of the new book, Unlearning Silence, and she will share her tools to help you unlearn silence and find your true voice. From Today's Pod, You'll Learn: -How to break through silence and find your voice-How to set healthy boundaries-How to cultivate better communication-How to handle and overcome silence in your workplace-Tips to stand up for Yourself More on Elaine: Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer.She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation.-Remember to subscribe/follow the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. Please leave us a rating and review- it helps SO much in getting the show out there. And tell a friend about the show- podcasts are very personal and tend to be spread person to person. If this show helped you or made you smile, share the love :) Follow the show @unleashyourinnercreative Follow me @LaurenLoGrasso 

Do you feel confident enough to speak up when it matters? In this Live Greatly podcast episode, Kristel Bauer sits down with Elaine Lin Hering, the Author of 'Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully".  Kristel and Elaine discuss how to find your voice in your personal and professional life, what prevents us from speaking up and steps you can take to unlearn silence today.  Tune in now!  Key Takeaways From This Episode How to find your voice  A look into Elaine's book 'Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully' How to handle uncomfortable feelings that surface when you want to speak your mind Inspiration to show up authentically as you  ABOUT ELAINE LIN HERING: Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. In her career, Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation. ABOUT THE BOOK, UNLEARNING SILENCE: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully (Penguin Life; March 19, 2024): Each of us has a unique gift to offer our community: our voice. But despite our distinct and valuable perspectives, many of us choose to stay silent. Family norms, workplace hierarchies, and biased cultures can make us think twice about expressing ourselves, sharing new ideas, and even speaking out when we know something is wrong. In UNLEARNING SILENCE: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully (Penguin Life; March 19, 2024), speaker and facilitator Elaine Lin Hering takes our culture of silence to task. This paradigm-shifting book explores how we've learned to be silent, how we've benefited from silence, how we've silenced other people, and how we might choose another way. Throughout life, we're often encouraged to just speak up! But it's never that easy. Race, gender, sexuality, identity, and power are instrumental factors that decide who feels comfortable sharing their thoughts— and as many of us know, having a seat at the table doesn't mean that your voice is actually welcome. Why speak up if you know that it won't be received well, and in fact, often makes things worse? Elaine Lin Hering has worked with mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Google, Nike, Pixar, and the Red Cross to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. In her work, she's seen the pervasive influence of silence in many forms. Hering has developed strategies to recognize and unlearn unconscious patterns so we can make intentional choices about how we want to show up at home and at work. Her empowering, compassionate, and practical approach acknowledges that we've all been both silenced and silencers. Connect with Elaine Website: https://elainelinhering.com/  Buy Elaine's Book: https://elainelinhering.com/book/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elainelinhering/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elainelinhering/  About the Host of the Live Greatly podcast, Kristel Bauer: Kristel Bauer is a corporate wellness expert, popular keynote and TEDx speaker, and the host of top-rated podcast, “Live Greatly,” a show frequently ranked in the top 1% for self-improvement. Kristel is an Integrative Medicine Fellow & Physician Assistant with clinical experience in Integrative Psychiatry, giving her a unique perspective into optimizing mental well-being and attaining a mindset for more happiness and success in the workplace and beyond. Kristel decided to leave clinical practice in 2019 when she founded her wellness platform “Live Greatly” to share her message around well-being and success on a larger scale.  With a mission to support companies and individuals on their journeys for more happiness, success, and well-being, Kristel taps into her unique background in healthcare, business, and media, to provide invaluable insights into high power habits, leadership development, mental well-being, peak performance, resilience, sales, success, wellness at work, and a modern approach to work/life balance. Kristel is a contributing writer for Entrepreneur and she is an influencer in the business and wellness space having been recognized as a Top 10 Social Media Influencer of 2021 in Forbes. A popular speaker on a variety of topics, Kristel has presented to groups at APMP, Bank of America, Commercial Metals Company, General Mills, Northwestern University, Mazda, Santander Bank and many more. She has been featured in Forbes, Forest & Bluff Magazine, Authority Magazine & Podcast Magazine, has contributed to CEOWORLD Magazine & Real Leaders Magazine, and has appeared on ABC 7 Chicago, WGN Daytime Chicago, Fox 4's WDAF-TV's Great Day KC and Ticker News. Kristel lives in the Chicago area with her husband and their 2 children.  She can be booked for speaking engagements worldwide. To Book Kristel as a speaker for your next event, click here. Website: www.livegreatly.co  Follow Kristel Bauer on: Instagram: @livegreatly_co  LinkedIn: Kristel Bauer Twitter: @livegreatly_co Facebook: @livegreatly.co Youtube: Live Greatly, Kristel Bauer To Watch Kristel Bauer's TEDx talk of Redefining Work/Life Balance in a COVID-19 World click here. Click HERE to check out Kristel's corporate wellness and leadership blog Click HERE to check out Kristel's Travel and Wellness Blog Disclaimer: The contents of this podcast are intended for informational and educational purposes only. Always seek the guidance of your physician for any recommendations specific to you or for any questions regarding your specific health, your sleep patterns changes to diet and exercise, or any medical conditions.  Always consult your physician before starting any supplements or new lifestyle programs. All information, views and statements shared on the Live Greatly podcast are purely the opinions of the authors, and are not medical advice or treatment recommendations.  They have not been evaluated by the food and drug administration.  Opinions of guests are their own and Kristel Bauer & this podcast does not endorse or accept responsibility for statements made by guests.  Neither Kristel Bauer nor this podcast takes responsibility for possible health consequences of a person or persons following the information in this educational content.  Always consult your physician for recommendations specific to you.  

We interview Sheila Heen on negotiation and difficult conversations. The talk includes practical advice, understanding the role of identity, discussions on the research behind "anchoring," analyzing a scenario, and more. A bit about Sheila Heen:Sheila Heen is the Thaddeus R. Beal Professor of Practice at Harvard Law School and serves as a Deputy Director of the Harvard Negotiation Project.Prof. Heen specializes in particularly difficult negotiations – where emotions run high and relationships are strained.  She is also a co-author of two New York Times bestsellers, "Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most" and "Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well."  She has written for the Harvard Business Review, and the New York Times as a guest expert, and as a Modern Love columnist. Prof. Heen is also a Founder of Triad Consulting Group, a corporate education and consulting firm that serves clients on six continents.  Her corporate clients have included Pixar, the NBA, and Ford, to name a few. She often works with executive teams, helping them to work through conflict, repair working relationships and make sound decisions together. In the public sector she has also provided training for the New England Organ Bank, the Singapore Supreme Court, the Obama White House and theologians struggling with disagreement over the nature of truth and God.Prof. Heen is a graduate of Occidental College and Harvard Law School. She was also my professor. 

Sheila Heen: Difficult Conversations Sheila Heen is the Thaddeus R. Beal Professor of Practice at Harvard Law School, a Deputy Director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, and a founder of Triad Consulting Group. She often works with executive teams to engage conflict productively, repair working relationships, and implement change in complex organizations. She has published articles in The New York Times and the Harvard Business Review and appeared on Oprah, CNBC's Power Lunch, and NPR. She is coauthor along with Douglas Stone of The New York Times bestseller Thanks for the Feedback and also now, in it's third edition, co-author with Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton of the iconic bestseller, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most*. When our intentions are good, it's hard to appreciate how we could have had such negative impact on someone else. It's equally challenging to navigate a tough conversation when someone else's words or actions have wronged us, even if that's not what they intended. In this conversation, Sheila and I discuss how to shift just a bit to help our difficult conversations go better. Key Points Intent does not equal impact. It's a mistake to assume that we know the other party's intentions. It's a mistake to assume that good intentions erase bad impact. Prevent the first mistake by attempting to separate intent from impact. Use these three questions: Actions: What did the other person actually say or do? Impact: What was the impact of this on me? Assumption: Based on this impact, what assumption am I making about what the other person intended? To present the second mistake, listen first for feelings before sharing intent. It's helpful also to reflect on your own intent, which may not always be as pure as initially recognized. Resources Mentioned Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most* by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Get Way Better at Accepting Feedback, with Sheila Heen (episode 143) How to Begin Difficult Conversations About Race, with Kwame Christian (episode 594) How to Deal With Passive-Aggressive People, Amy Gallo (episode 595) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

Brought to you by Nordic Naturals Ultimate Omega fish oil, Helix Sleep premium mattresses, and ShipStation shipping software. Sheila Heen has spent the last three decades working to understand how people can better navigate conflict, with a particular specialty in difficult conversations. She is a founder of Triad Consulting Group, a professor at Harvard Law School, and a co-author of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (even when it's off base, unfair, poorly delivered, and, frankly, you're not in the mood), with Douglas Stone, and Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, with Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton (with a newly updated third edition that was released in August).Sheila and her colleagues at Triad work with leaders and organizations to build their capacity to have the conversations that matter most. Her clients have included Pixar, American Express, the NBA, the Singapore Supreme Court, the Obama White House, and theologians struggling with the nature of truth and God.She is schooled in negotiation daily by her three children. You can find my first conversation with Sheila at tim.blog/SheilaHeen.Please enjoy!This episode is brought to you by Nordic Naturals, the #1-selling fish-oil brand in the US! More than 80% of Americans don't get enough omega-3 fats from their diet. That is a problem because the body can't produce omega-3s, an important nutrient for cell structure and function. Nordic Naturals solves that problem with their doctor-recommended Ultimate Omega fish-oil formula for heart health, brain function, immune support, and more. Ultimate Omega is made exclusively from 100% wild-caught sardines and anchovies. It's incredibly pure and fresh with no fishy aftertaste. All Nordic Naturals' fish-oil products are offered in the triglyceride molecular form—the form naturally found in fish, and the form your body most easily absorbs. Go to Nordic.com and discover why Nordic Naturals is the #1-selling omega-3 brand in the U.S. Use promo code TIM for 20% off your order. *This episode is also brought to you by ShipStation. Do you sell stuff online? Then you know what a pain the shipping process is. ShipStation was created to make your life easier. Whether you're selling on eBay, Amazon, Shopify, or over 100 other popular selling channels, ShipStation lets you access all of your orders from one simple dashboard, and it works with all of the major shipping carriers, locally and globally, including FedEx, UPS, and USPS. Join the 130,000+ companies that have grown their ecommerce businesses with ShipStation. Tim Ferriss Show listeners get to try ShipStation free for 60 days! Just visit ShipStation.com/Tim!*This episode is also brought to you by Helix Sleep! Helix was selected as the best overall mattress of 2022 by GQ magazine, Wired, and Apartment Therapy. With Helix, there's a specific mattress to meet each and every body's unique comfort needs. Just take their quiz—only two minutes to complete—that matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect mattress for you. They have a 10-year warranty, and you get to try it out for a hundred nights, risk-free. They'll even pick it up from you if you don't love it. And now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders plus two free pillows at HelixSleep.com/Tim.*For show notes and past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast.For deals from sponsors of The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast-sponsorsSign up for Tim's email newsletter (5-Bullet Friday) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim's books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissYouTube: youtube.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Margaret Atwood, Mark Zuckerberg, Peter Thiel, Dr. Gabor Maté, Anne Lamott, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“Our silence isn't just about us. It's about the environmental and cultural norms that we collectively build… What are we missing out on that we don't even realize?”Elaine Lin Hering is Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group, a Lecturer at Harvard Law School, and author of the forthcoming book, Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully.In today's episode, we discuss:- Pushing the bounds of what good leadership looks like- The false dichotomy of a zero-sum mindset- Subversive patterns and how we've all learned to stay silent- Leadership impact - How (and why) to break free/actually use our voices“If we have one life to live, let's live it well – as determined by our own internal metric of what that means.”—Elaine Lin Hering is Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer at Harvard Law School. She works with leaders to diagnose challenges and build capacity in negotiation, influence, and conflict management skills. She has worked on six continents and facilitated executive education at Harvard, Dartmouth, UC Berkeley, and UCLA. She coaches women and minoritized individuals navigating executive leadership in majority white spaces. She is the author of the forthcoming book, Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully  (available for pre-order now).To learn more or to connect with Elaine visit elainelinhering.com. You can also find her on LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter.

The following is a conversation between Sheila Heen, Harvard Law professor, and co-author of Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well, and Denver Frederick, the Host of The Business of Giving.   In today's episode of The Business of Giving, we tackle the challenges of difficult conversations and receiving feedback. Whether it's our personal or professional lives, these situations can be uncomfortable and often lead to miscommunication and hurt feelings. But fear not, my next guest is a world-renowned negotiation expert who will help us navigate these challenges with greater confidence and ease. She is Sheila Heen, founder of the Triad Consulting Group, a professor of practice at Harvard Law School where she leads a negotiation program, and co-author of the New York Times bestsellers, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well.

"Hey, we need to talk..." -- if these words scare you, trust that you're not alone! Whether we're dealing with an underperforming employee, upset with our spouse, or facing issues with a difficult client, we attempt to avoid difficult conversations every day. Healthy relationships are built around communication and transparency, so learning how to navigate tough conversations with less stress and more success can help optimize our relationships. Today we're talking to Sheila Heen, professor at Harvard Law School and author of one of the most popular psychology books ever created, Difficult Conversations. In the book, Sheila outlines how to navigate tense and emotionally-charged conversations, something we all have to deal with in our lives at one point or another. Tune in to learn the three layers of difficult conversations and how to overcome each one of them, as well as the benefit of telling a third story to start your discussions off on the right foot. You'll also learn how to enhance the skill of receiving feedback by understanding the common initial reactions we all have when receiving negative feedback and how to deal with them in a positive way. Topics Include:  - Getting involved in the Harvard Negotiation Project  - Writing Difficult Conversations  - How has Difficult Conversations been used since its publication?  - Why did she write Thanks For The Feedback?  - What is a difficult conversation?  - Why do we avoid difficult conversations?  - The danger of avoiding difficult conversations - Three layers of difficult conversations  - Lessening blame and accusatory language  - Exploring our emotional patterns  - Anger is a secondary feeling  - Reducing angry reactivity  - Naming emotions vs. being emotional  - Starting from the third story  - Why do we have an issue receiving negative feedback? - Different types of triggers  - Traits of people who are highly sensitive to feedback  - Dealing with triggers and reactions  - And other topics… Sheila Heen is a founder of Triad Consulting Group, a consulting firm dedicated to helping companies of all sizes improve their leadership, collaboration, and conflict management skills. Her clients include BAE Systems, HSBC, the Federal Reserve Bank, Merck, and the Bank of South Africa. She has spent 20 years with the Harvard Negotiation Project and she is the author of two bestselling books, Difficult Conversations and Thanks For The Feedback.  Resources Mentioned: Triad Consulting Group: https://www.triadconsultinggroup.com/team/sheila-heen  Sheila's Books: https://www.stoneandheen.com/  Sheila's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sheila-heen-b8a59a6/  Sponsored By:  More About Young and Profiting Download Transcripts - youngandprofiting.com   Get Sponsorship Deals - youngandprofiting.com/sponsorships Leave a Review - ratethispodcast.com/yap Watch Videos - youtube.com/c/YoungandProfiting Follow Hala Taha LinkedIn - linkedin.com/in/htaha/ Instagram - instagram.com/yapwithhala/ TikTok - tiktok.com/@yapwithhala Twitter - twitter.com/yapwithhala Learn more about YAP Media Agency Services - yapmedia.io/ Join Hala's LinkedIn Masterclass - yapmedia.io/course  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sheila Heen is the founder of Triad Consulting Group, a lecturer on law at Harvard Law School and Co-Author of “Thanks for the Feedback” and “Difficult Conversations”. She is consulting with companies ranging from Pixar, Hugo Boss to the NBA around difficult conversations, negotiation and sound decision-making. We have invited Sheila Heen to talk about the conversations around feedback and specifically how we can each be better feedback receivers.   The key topics covered in this episode are: How do we move away from being dismissive in the way we receive feedback to genuinely being grateful and appreciating the feedback Feedback as a learning and leadership skill The three types of triggered feedback reactions: Truth triggers, relationship triggers and identity triggers Asking for the feedback you want Enabling feedback in your organisation  For references, links, and other episodes, visit the podcast homepage here. 

About the book The performance evaluation at work; the parenting advice from your mother-in-law; the lecture by the cop who just pulled you over. We get feedback every day of our lives, from friends and family, colleagues, customers, and bosses, teachers, doctors, and strangers.  We're assessed, coached, and criticized about our performance, personalities, and appearance. We know that feedback is essential for professional development and healthy relationships—but we dread it and often dismiss it.  That's because receiving feedback sits at the junction of two conflicting human desires. We want to learn and grow, but we also want to be accepted and respected just as we are now.  Thanks for the Feedback is the first book to address this tension head on.  It explains why getting feedback is so crucial yet so challenging and offers a simple framework and powerful tools to help us take on life's blizzard of offhand comments, annual evaluations, and unsolicited advice with curiosity and grace. Source: https://www.stoneandheen.com/thanks-feedback    About the authors Doug Stone is a Founder of Triad Consulting and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. He has also written screenplays, and is determined to play guitar better than his friends. Sheila is a Founder of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. Her husband teaches negotiation at MIT, and they are both schooled regularly in negotiation by their three kids. Source: https://www.stoneandheen.com/authors    Three big ideas 1) The gift and the colonoscopy 2) The three types of feedback 3) Know your triggersSupport my book habit: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/stephsbookshelfSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Some employees dread performance reviews; others leave them confused or wishing they got more from them. How can managers be considerate of the best way to deliver feedback? And how can they be more inclusive when giving evaluations? Debbie Goldstein, CEO of Triad Consulting Group, joins the podcast to discuss the changing nature of these conversations in a transforming workplace, common pitfalls managers encounter and how they can avoid them.

Some employees dread performance reviews; others leave them confused or wishing they got more from them. How can managers be considerate of the best way to deliver feedback? And how can they be more inclusive when giving evaluations? Debbie Goldstein, CEO of Triad Consulting Group, joins the podcast to discuss the changing nature of these conversations in a transforming workplace, common pitfalls managers encounter and how they can avoid them.

Some employees dread performance reviews; others leave them confused or wishing they got more from them. How can managers be considerate of the best way to deliver feedback? And how can they be more inclusive when giving evaluations? Debbie Goldstein, CEO of Triad Consulting Group, joins the podcast to discuss the changing nature of these conversations in a transforming workplace, common pitfalls managers encounter and how they can avoid them.

HIGHLIGHTS 04:51 Learning conflict negotiation and navigating difficult conversations 11:07 Assertiveness: If one party perceives a problem, then it is a problem15:04 The 3 Positions: My POV, your POV, and a 3rd person's POV20:59 Reaching out and starting from a place of empathy24:35 Address actions specifically and be aware of your contributions to the problem31:31 Defining a good outcome and reaching as close to a win-win as possible35:24 Mitigating bias and ensuring both parties agree with your intervention40:20 Learning negotiation skills adds to your existing tools for managing conflictQUOTES08:51 "You can make a standing offer like I invite you to discuss this with me. People tend to be more receptive to an invitation than to a demand. But another thing you can do is let them know the impact that the dispute is having on you."15:53 "The third position, which is not my position, not your position, but a position outside, almost like if we had a mutual friend who was neutral as to this conflict, they would look at the conflict as a third person and they would have a really different angle on it."26:22 "The reason it's important isn't because you don't have the Cheerios, it's because it impacts whether you feel the other person loves you, respects you, cares about you and the ways that you care about them." 32:31 "We often think of negotiation just as zero sum, head-to-head, dollar for you is a dollar less for me. And that's true on some issues, right? But often you can find ways to maximize that joint pie that you're dividing."40:30 "If you want to be assertive or threaten somebody, you can still do that.It's not like I'm taking away your ability to do that. So you retain all the skills that you have, all the methods that you have, and we're just adding some new ones."To learn more about Doug, you can check out the email address below.Website (Stone & Heen) - https://www.stoneandheen.com/doug-stoneWebsite (Triad Consulting Free Resources) - https://www.triadconsultinggroup.com/learning-resourcesIf you enjoyed today's episode, please subscribe, review and share with a friend who would benefit from the message. If you're interested in picking up a copy of Jonathan Goldhill's book, Disruptive Successor, go to the website at www.DisruptiveSuccessor.com.

Sheila Heen of The Harvard Negotiation Project — How to Navigate Hard Conversations, the Subtle Art of Apologizing, and a Powerful 60-Day Challenge | Brought to you by LinkedIn Jobs recruitment platform with 750M users, Eight Sleep's Pod Pro Cover sleeping solution for dynamic cooling and heating, and Public Goods high-quality everyday essentials. More on all three below.Sheila Heen is a New York Times best-selling author, founder of Triad Consulting Group, and a deputy director of the Harvard Negotiation Project at Harvard Law School, where she has been a member of the faculty for 25 years. Sheila specializes in particularly difficult negotiations, where emotions run high and relationships become strained. She often works with executive teams, helping them to resolve conflict, repair professional relationships, and make sound decisions together. In the public sector, she has provided training for the New England Organ Bank, the Singapore Supreme Court, the Obama White House, and theologians struggling with disagreement over the nature of truth and God.Sheila is co-author of the New York Times bestsellers Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (even when it's off base, unfair, poorly delivered and, frankly, you're not in the mood). She has written for the Harvard Business Review and the New York Times — as a guest expert and contributor to the “Modern Love” column — and she has appeared on NPR, Fox News, CNBC's Power Lunch, and shows as diverse as Oprah and The G. Gordon Liddy Show. She has spoken at the Global Leadership Summit, the Nordic Business Forum, the Smithsonian, Apple, Google, and Microsoft. Sheila is a graduate of Occidental College and Harvard Law School. She is schooled in negotiation daily by her three children.Please enjoy!This episode is brought to you by Eight Sleep! Eight Sleep's Pod Pro Cover is the easiest and fastest way to sleep at the perfect temperature. It pairs dynamic cooling and heating with biometric tracking to offer the most advanced (and user-friendly) solution on the market. Simply add the Pod Pro Cover to your current mattress and start sleeping as cool as 55°F or as hot as 110°F. It also splits your bed in half, so your partner can choose a totally different temperature.And now, my dear listeners—that's you—can get $250 off the Pod Pro Cover. Simply go to EightSleep.com/Tim or use code TIM. *This episode is also brought to you by Public Goods! Public Goods is the one-stop shop for sustainable, high-quality, everyday essentials made from clean ingredients at an affordable price. Public Goods searches the globe to find healthy, eco-friendly, and innovative products and then packages them using a single, streamlined aesthetic for your home so you can get all of your premium essentials in one place and avoid buying from a bunch of mismatched, single-product brands. Multiple people on my team were already using Public Goods, and now, so am I.Visit PublicGoods.com/Tim to receive $20 off the products in your first Public Goods order using code TIM, with no minimum purchase required! *This episode is also brought to you by LinkedIn Jobs. Whether you are looking to hire now for a critical role or thinking about needs that you may have in the future, LinkedIn Jobs can help. LinkedIn screens candidates for the hard and soft skills you're looking for and puts your job in front of candidates looking for job opportunities that match what you have to offer.Using LinkedIn's active community of more than 750 million professionals worldwide, LinkedIn Jobs can help you find and hire the right person faster. When your business is ready to make that next hire, find the right person with LinkedIn Jobs. And now, you can post a job for free. Just visit LinkedIn.com/Tim.*If you enjoy the podcast, would you please consider leaving a short review on Apple Podcasts/iTunes? It takes less than 60 seconds, and it really makes a difference in helping to convince hard-to-get guests. I also love reading the reviews!For show notes and past guests, please visit tim.blog/podcast.Sign up for Tim's email newsletter (“5-Bullet Friday”) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim's books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss YouTube: youtube.com/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Did you know that every difficult conversation is actually three conversations, and two of them we ignore at our peril? Did you know that one of the longest standing national border disputes finally got resolved after two of the adversaries discovered they had one special thing in common? And did you know that by asking three simple questions, you can put your difficult conversation on the road to resolution? Well, get ready to learn about all that and more, because it's just a small part of my conversation with mediation expert Douglas Stone, former associate director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, co-founder of the Triad Consulting Group, and, last but not least, co-author of the New York Times best seller, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, and his most recent book with co-author Sheila Heen, Thanks for the Feedback, The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well. _________________________For more insights into the art and science of difficult conversations, check out my website. You can also sign up for my free newsletter.

Greetings from Kim Leary and Mike Wheeler, co-hosts of Agility at Work. And for our latest episode, we’re co-authors of this description of our latest episode. It’s Kim here at the top, introducing our guest Sheila Heen, who teaches negotiation at Harvard Law School, and offers training and consulting through Triad Consulting Group. This is … Continue reading 32. Prepping for Difficult Conversations →

Should you be a b*tch when you ask for what you want? What does being a b*tch even mean? Join Harvard Law grad and expert communications coach Elaine Lin Hering and I as we discuss these dilemmas. Elaine was just 33 when she made managing partner of the Triad Consulting Group, which helps companies with conflict management and negotiation. In Part 1, we discuss definitions of b*itch, how to promote your professional accomplishments - well before your performance review and without eliciting jealousy from your colleagues - and getting prestigious jobs with the help of mentors. Resources: https://www.triadconsultinggroup.com hering@diffcon.com Want to chat more about this? Join our discussion on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/achen.msj/ or Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2869727736597314 Episode Sponser: Brightstory Admission Consulting www.BrightStory.info --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/happyaw/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/happyaw/support

Should you be a b*tch when you ask for what you want? What does being a b*tch even mean? Join Harvard Law grad and expert communications coach Elaine Lin Hering and I as we discuss these dilemmas. Elaine was just 33 when she made managing partner of the Triad Consulting Group, which helps companies with conflict management and negotiation. In this episode, we discuss how to find a mentor, how to advocate without being a b*tch, and speaking up at home. Resources: https://www.triadconsultinggroup.com hering@diffcon.com Want to chat more about this? Join our discussion on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/achen.msj/ or Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2869727736597314 Episode Sponser: Brightstory Admission Consulting www.BrightStory.info --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/happyaw/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/happyaw/support

Difficult conversations are not easy, but are essential for any leader. Have you realised you are actually navigating three conversations in one? How do you deal with your own inner dialogue? How can you close the gap between what you are thinking and what you are saying? I chat to leadership expert and consultant Julie Okada from Triad Consulting Group as I seek the answers to these questions and more. 

Sheila Heen is the Founder of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer at Harvard Law School.Besides teaching at Harvard, Sheila has worked with the biggest companies in the world, helping their executive teams work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together.She has also spent the last twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. Sheila specializes in particularly difficult negotiations – where emotions run high and relationships become strained. She's written two very successful books: Difficult Conversationsand the one we're talking about today, Thanks for the Feedback.I really wanted to talk to Sheila because there have been so many books written on how to give feedback to others, but if we're going to learn from our mistakes and get even better at what we're already doing, we must learn how to not only ask for but listen to feedback. Sheila's book is a rare and incredible resource in this regard, and I just had to share it with you.Specifically, Sheila and I discuss:- How to make feedback work in your organization- The problem with coaching and why it doesn't work quite like we hope- The three different kinds of feedback you can give someone- Why the feedback sandwich doesn't work, and how to give critical feedback much better.- How to process the feedback you receive in a way you can actually use. Thanks for listening and be sure to find me online to tell me what you thought of the episode!@DianaKander on Instagram and Twitter Professional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com

In this episode, I’m really excited to have as my guest, Sheila Heen, co-author of Difficult Conversations and Thanks for the Feedback, She is Founder of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. Her corporate clients include BAE Systems, HSBC, the Federal Reserve Bank, Merck, MetLife, Novartis, Standard Bank of South Africa, Unilever, among others. She often work with executive teams, helping them to work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together. In the public sector, she has also provided training for the New England Organ Bank, the Singapore Supreme Court, the Obama White House. She's spent the last twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. She's appeared on shows as diverse as Oprah and the G. Gordon Liddy Show, NPR’s Diane Rehm Show, Fox News, NPR’s Market Money, and CNBC’s Power Lunch. In our discussion, Sheila and I talked about: Beginning the difficult conversations process with self-exploration The three types of feedback and the importance of appreciation How to give and receive valuable feedback Listen to the podcast to learn more. Show Notes and Blog The Podcasts

Are you putting off a crucial conversation that you know you should have? Would you like a step-by-step approach for how to have your toughest and most crucial conversations with less stress and more success? Who wouldn't! The proven strategy and lasting rewards for you and your organization are coming up, next. Sheila Heen is Founder of Triad Consulting Group and has been on the Harvard Law School faculty as a Lecturer of Law since 1995. Sheila has spent more than twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. She specializes in particularly difficult negotiations – where emotions run high and relationships become strained. Sheila is co-author of the New York Times bestseller: Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most. Find full show notes here https://www.bcwinstitute.org/podcast/sheila-heen-havi…lt-conversations/

Sheila Heen is my guest today. This is the second part of a two-part interview with her. The first part is available here. Sheila is the coauthor of Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (1999), a New York Times Business Bestseller that has continuously been in print. An updated 10th anniversary edition was published in 2010. She’s also the coauthor of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Arts of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It’s Off-Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered and Frankly, You’re Not in the Mood), a New York Times bestseller. She is a lecturer at Harvard Law School and a founder of Triad Consulting Group. Here is a transcript of this episode. If you enjoyed this show, please rate it on iTunes: * Go to the show’s iTunes page and click “View in iTunes”* Click “Ratings and Reviews” which is to the right of “Details”* Next to “Click to Rate” select the stars. See the full list of episodes of Half Hour of Heterodoxy >>

Sheila Heen is my guest today. She’s the coauthor of Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (1999), a New York Times Business Bestseller that has continuously been in print. An updated 10th anniversary edition was published in 2010. She’s also the coauthor of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It’s Off-Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered and Frankly, You’re Not in the Mood), a New York Times bestseller. She is a lecturer at Harvard Law School and a founder of Triad Consulting Group. We discuss difficult conversations between faculty and students in this episode, the first of two episodes with Sheila Heen. We recorded this using Skype because of technical problems with the application that we normally use. You may notice lower audio quality. Here is a transcript of this episode. Rating the Show If you enjoyed this show, please rate it on iTunes: * Go to the show’s iTunes page and click “View in iTunes”* Click “Ratings and Reviews” which is to the right of “Details”* Next to “Click to Rate” select the stars. See the full list of episodes of Half Hour of Heterodoxy >>

Douglas Stone is a Founder of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, where he teaches negotiation. Through Triad, he consults to a wide range of organizations, including Fidelity, Honda, HP, IBM, Merck, Microsoft, and Shell. Doug is co-author of the New York Times bestsellers Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (Penguin 2000), and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It's Off-Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered and Frankly, You're Not in the Mood) (Viking/Penguin 2014). His articles on negotiation and conflict resolution have appeared in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and the Boston Globe. He has appeared on many TV and radio shows, including Oprah. For more on Doug please visit www.triadconsultinggroup.comIn this episode we cover a wide array of topics including:-The three types of feedback (coaching, evaluation, and recognition), what they are, why they are important, and why we so often miss the mark with feedback-What gets in the way of receiving feedback-How to deliver feedback more effectively -The importance of moving from judgment to curiosity (and compassion) to foster learning-Why stories are so important in difficult conversations-Strategies and insights for engaging in difficult conversations more skillfully-And much more!For show notes and more please visit www.joshuasteinfeldt.com/podcastTake a moment and let us know what you think about the show by rating it on iTunes or writing a review. Thanks for listening and enjoy the show!Support the show (https://joshuasteinfeldt.com/donate/)

Jesse Chapman, a very special guest host, walks us through the New York Times Bestseller Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen. Read more about the authors below! Difficult Conversations provides a step-by-step approach to having tough conversations with less stress and more success. The book promises you'll learn how to:  -Decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation  -Start a conversation without defensiveness  -Listen for the meaning of what is not said  -Stay balanced in the face of attacks and accusations -Move from emotion to productive problem solving In this Difficult Conversations book review, we cover the main philosophies of the book and try mock difficult conversations ourselves. About the authors: Douglas Stone is a lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School and a founder of Triad Consulting Group. His articles on negotiation and conflict resolution have appeared in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Boston Globe, Management Consultant News, and IT Metrics. He has appeared on many TV and radio shows, including Oprah, and was a key-note speaker at the 2006 World Negotiation Forum in Brazil. Sheila Heen is also a Founder of Triad Consulting Group and has been on the Harvard Law School faculty as a Lecturer on Law since 1995. Sheila has spent more than twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. She specializes in particularly difficult negotiations – where emotions run high and relationships become strained. Sheila and Doug are co-authors of the New York Times bestsellers Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It’s Off-Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered and Frankly, You’re Not in the Mood) Bruce Patton is cofounder and distinguished fellow of the Harvard Negotiation Project and a founder and partner of Vantage Partners, LLC. Along with Roger Fisher, Patton pioneered the teaching of negotiation at Harvard Law School, where he has taught since 1981. In the public arena, he helped to structure the resolution of the 1980 U.S.-Iranian hostage conflict and continues to work toward better conflict management in the Middle East and elsewhere. He is a co-author of the bestselling book Getting to YES: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In.  If you'd like to buy the book, you can snag it here.  And if you'd like to know more about our awesome guest host Jesse, he can be found on Instagram @waitreally Jesse’s podcast Beyond Beyond Belief is also a ton of fun. Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Go Help Yourself!

We’re talking about feedback. Listen to difficult conversations expert and executive coach Debbie Goldstein discuss the power of coaching. Despite the fact that she doesn’t like being introduced as an expert or a master coach she is incredibly adept at listening closely to executives and students alike to help them raise awareness around themselves and their strategic choices. Learn about the concept of “doubling” and why it is so important to give people a safe “sandbox” in which to play. Debbie is a partner at Triad Consulting and teaches at Harvard Law School and Harvard Graduate School of Education. She is also an awesome, warm, and smart person. Bio:  Debbie is a Principal and the Managing Director of Triad Consulting Group. She teaches negotiation as a faculty member at Harvard Law School and Harvard Graduate School of Education. She has also taught at Tufts University School of Medicine and was an adjunct professor at Georgetown University Law Center for many years. Debbie’s varied clients include Merck, Chanel, Brigham and Women’s Hospital, Capital One, Barclay’s, Honda, Standard Bank, Shell, Boeing, General Mills, MetLife, PricewaterhouseCoopers, Citigroup, Prudential and Proctor & Gamble.  She has addressed students and alumni at Duke’s Fuqua School of Business, University of Denver, Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, Harvard Medical School,  Dartmouth’s Tuck Business School and Harvard Business School.  Her work often takes her internationally: to Dubai, where she worked with government leaders; to Ethiopia, where she worked with the Members of Parliament; and to Cyprus, where she taught public policy students from across the globe.   She coaches senior executives through difficult decision making and managing critical relationships, and has helped mediate family business disputes.  In the public sector, she founded and ran a free legal aid clinic called LINC (Legal Initiative for Children) for the patients at Massachusetts General Hospital’s Chelsea outpost.  She has been a featured guest on NPR, and her writing has appeared in the Boston Globe Magazine,  the Management Information Exchange Journal, and the Harvard Business Review. Debbie is a graduate of Williams College and Boston College Law School.  After college, Debbie lived in Chicago chasing (and catching) her dream of becoming a jazz vocalist.  

The RDC spoke with Sheila Heen, author of "Difficult Conversations" and "Thanks for the Feedback". She is a Found of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. It's already hard to ask for and to receive

The RDC spoke with Sheila Heen, author of "Difficult Conversations" and "Thanks for the Feedback". She is a Found of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. It's already hard to ask for and to receive feedback from those around us. In this episode we learn more about how to get feedback especially when you are in a position (such as a Chaplain or Religious Affairs Airman) where it is even more difficult to find because of our special role among the people we serve.Take a listen then leave us some feedback in the comments!

With Sheila Heen Sheila is a Founder of Triad Consulting Group and has been on the Harvard Law School faculty as a Lecturer on Law since 1995. Sheila’s corporate clients include Pixar, Hugo Boss, the NBA, the Federal Reserve Bank, Ford, Novartis, AT&T and numerous family businesses. She often works with executive teams, helping them to work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together. Sheila is co-author of two New York Times bestsellers: Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (Penguin 2nd ed 2010), and the recently released Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It’s Off Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered, and Frankly, You’re Not in the Mood) (Penguin 2014). She has written for the Harvard Business Review, for the New York Times as a guest expert and as a Modern Love writer. In this episode we'll talk about: Feedback and how we need to change our mindsets. The biggest myth about feedback Why giving and getting feedback is so challenging? Even when someone is saying SUPER nice things it can still SO CRINGEY! The three types of feedback that Sheila has been able to identify through her work and how they intersect Why we REJECT feedback/coaching? “The impact you have on other people is invisible to you.” ~ Sheila Heen The best way to see and understand our own impact on the world? The key to getting valuable, helpful feedback? How Sheila came to her own realizations about feedback? For more see https://info.smartsavvy.com/podcast

Authors Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen teach skills for receiving feedback in their book, Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well. Subtitled Even When It Is Off Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered, and, Frankly, You're Not in the Mood, the book strikes at the heart of why getting feedback can be uncomfortable, awkward, and even painful. Stone and Heen hit the troubles and triggers that surround the skills we need to accept opinions and advice from others. 00:15   Intro to Doug Stone, author of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well 00:25   Founder of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School 02:00   Janet’s daughter-in-law read Feedback at Vivint (company) book group 02:20   Vivint employees share their feedback with Stone 02:40   Book includes good advice for feedback givers, too 02:50   How should we give feedback to those who don’t want to receive it? 04:20   Why Stone focuses on receiving rather than on giving feedback 06:00   Receiving feedback can be both really hard and really helpful; an active skill 07:00   Long subtitle explains the feedback conundrum 07:45   Most don’t really want feedback; life experiences tell us it can be painful or wrong 08:20   Receiving feedback not the same as taking feedback 09:30   Types of feedback: appreciation, coaching, evaluation (We need all three!) 09:45   We get emotionally tangled when we hear one kind and need another 10:45   Coaching: at the heart of feedback; helps us improve; can be specific 11:10   Evaluation: ranks or places us; comparative 13:00   Receivers should elicit from feedback givers the kind of feedback they need/want 15:10   Norman Rockwell’s triple self-portrait included at end of book 16:00   How to amplify our own blind spots 17:00   Paradox – think we know ourselves best, yet feedback often reflection of unknown parts 17:45   Unbeknownst to us, body language and facial expressions can belie our true selves 19:15   Increase awareness of our silent messages by actively soliciting help from others 21:20   Use language that elicits the precise type of feedback you’re seeking 24:40   Genuine, truthful feedback can jeopardize relationships 25:10   Book’s teachings can give voice, confidence, and power to strengthen relationships 25:30   Asking for workplace feedback can make you easier to work with 27:15   Feedback can enhance our “growth mindset” (Carol Dweck) 28:45   Unclear feedback (coaching vs. evaluation) – receiver can choose which to hear 29:45   Coaching feedback easier to take in than evaluation 30:45   “Constructive criticism” 31:20   Two kinds of coaching: how to improve you and how to improve a relationship with you 34:00   How to avoid the “Google bias” 38:50   Receiving feedback requires a degree of courage 40:45   Reframing feedback makes it easier to receive 41:30   In business, make the topic of feedback easy to discuss 44:30   Recommendation: True Colors Card Game: What Do Your Friends Really Think of You? BUY Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well BUY True Colors Card Game Connect with Nonfiction4Life! Facebook Instagram Twitter YouTube Website Special thanks… Music Credit Sound Editing Credit

This week we talk about the beginning of Lent and I share some of my plans for the coming forty days. I also share a recent conversation I had with Dr. Ann Garrido, a professor and author. Ann Garrido, Doctor of Ministry, is associate professor of homiletics at Aquinas Institute of Theology in St. Louis, MO and a consultant with Triad Consulting Group, a conflict mediation and communications team based in Cambridge, MA. She is the author of six books and numerous articles in the field of Church leadership and ministry.

Sheila Heen is cofounder of Triad Consulting Group, Lecturer at Harvard Law School and coauthor of Difficult Conversations and Thanks for the Feedback.

Debbie Goldstein is Principal and Managing Director at Triad Consulting Group.  She teaches communication and conflict resolution all over the world for top organizations. Debbie and I spoke a lot about friendship and its influence on our networks, including how she started her job at Triad.  Enjoy!