Podcast appearances and mentions of Douglas Stone

Send us a textAre you tired of feeling defensive every time someone says, "Can I give you some feedback?" In this episode, leadership communication expert Kele Belton dives deep into the bestselling book "Thanks for the Feedback" by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, sharing actionable strategies that help women leaders receive feedback without getting defensive.What You'll Learn:The 3 feedback triggers that make leaders defensive (and how to overcome them)How to distinguish between appreciation, coaching, and evaluation feedback4 proven strategies for receiving feedback like a confident leaderThe Johari Window technique for identifying your leadership blind spotsA simple "feedback triage" framework to decide which feedback to act onWhy receiving feedback well is more important than giving itPerfect For:Women in leadership positionsAspiring female leadersManagers who struggle with receiving criticismLeaders who want to improve their emotional intelligenceAnyone who gets defensive when receiving feedbackProfessionals seeking leadership developmentBook Mentioned:"Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well" by Douglas Stone and Sheila HeenAbout the Host:Kele Belton is a communication and leadership speaker, facilitator, and coach who specializes in helping women leaders develop confidence and impact through better communication skills.—--------------------------------------------------------Connect with Kele for more leadership insights: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kele-ruth-belton/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetailoredapproach/ Website: https://thetailoredapproach.com 

In this episode of Partnering Leadership, Mahan Tavakoli speaks with Jim Detert, John L. Colley Professor of Business Administration at the University of Virginia's Darden School of Business and author of Choosing Courage: The Everyday Guide to Being Brave at Work. In this conversation, Jim Detert shares how we can become more courageous by developing our courage capabilities. Jim Detert also shares how leaders can nurture a psychologically safe organizational culture, enabling and encouraging more courageous interactions and decisions at work.   Some highlights:-Why attributing courage just to historical figures can be counterproductive -The importance of being more courageous and how to develop our courage muscle-Jim Detert on the benefits of courage at work-How leaders can create a psychologically safe environment that encourages team members to speak up and contribute their best at workMentioned:-Amy Edmondson, Professor of Leadership at Harvard Business School and author of Fearless Organization and Creating Psychological Safety-Vanessa Bohns (Listen to Partnering Leadership conversation with Vanessa Bohns)-Gary Bolles (Listen to Partnering Leadership conversation with Gary Bolles)-Difficult Conversations by Bruce Patton, Douglas Stone, and Sheila Heen-Radical Candor by Kim Scott-Giving Voice to Values by Mary C. Gentile -The Silent Language Of Leaders by Carol GoldmanConnect with Jim Detert:Jim Detert WebsiteChoosing Courage on AmazonJim Detert on FacebookJim Detert on LinkedIn Connect with Mahan Tavakoli: Mahan Tavakoli Website Mahan Tavakoli on LinkedIn Partnering Leadership Website

Melody Wilding breaks down the crucial conversations to have with your boss to improve your work life. — YOU'LL LEARN — 1) How to differentiate yourself with one conversation 2) How to build your pushback power 3) The easiest way to improve your visibility Subscribe or visit AwesomeAtYourJob.com/ep1038 for clickable versions of the links below. — ABOUT MELODY — Melody Wilding is a professor of human behavior at Hunter College and author of Managing Up. She was recently named one of Insider's “most innovative career coaches.” Her background as a therapist and emotions researcher informs her unique approach, weaving evidence-based neuroscience and psychology with professional development. Her previous book is Trust Yourself. • Book: Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge • Website: ManagingUp.com — RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE SHOW — • Book: Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen • Book: Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen — THANK YOU SPONSORS! — • Earth Breeze. Get 40% off your subscription at earthbreeze.com/AWESOME• BambooHR. See all that BambooHR can do at bamboohr.com/freedemoSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

they're not putting away their dishes, so do you put them away for them or let the mold grow? through interviews, we talk with self-proclaimed "bad roommates" and individuals who have firsthand experience dealing with challenging living situations. We whether those deemed as "bad roommates" are aware of their impact on shared living spaces and ask the question we all wish we could ask: “Why are you like that?” we also talk with healthy communication and boundaries expert and “Difficult Conversations” author Douglas Stone to help us figure out the best way to deal with bad roommates. you might want to send this episode out to a few people… Follow GrownKid on Instagram: @Grownk1d @gaelaitor @_kaylasuarez JOIN OUR SOCIAL CLUB: https://form.typeform.com/to/eBSho4lE Featured Guests: Sabrina Brier: @sabrinabrier comedian, influencer Deke: self-proclaimed bad roommate About Our Partners: GrownKid is made possible by the Schultz Family Foundation, dedicated to helping young people unlock their full potential and successfully navigate to fulfilling careers. GrownKid is made in partnership with Joy Coalition where purpose driven content meets powerful storytelling. From 13 reasons Why to unprisoned, Joy Coalition projects are made to bridge generations and drive groundbreaking conversations. Interested in a career in mental health? Check out the Youth Mental Health Corps – a new program created by the Schultz Family Foundation, Pinterest and AmeriCorps - where anyone with a high school degree can gain experience, skills, and a credential during a year of paid service in the mental health field. Learn more at youthmentalhealthcorps.org Resources: What is OppNet? The Opportunity Network is a New York City-based national nonprofit organization that ignites the drive, curiosity, and agency of underrepresented students on their paths to and through college and into thriving careers, powered by our commitment to access and community. Through our programs, students gain access to educational resources, professional networks, and career opportunities. Visit opportunitynetwork.org for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What is narcissistic personality disorder, and how does it interact with porn and sex addiction? For someone with NPD or narcissistic traits, what does healing and growth look like?Dr. Alexandra Repke (CSAT, EMDR, C-PD) is a Christian psychologist who typically work with successful professionals facing challenges in their relationships or careers, often stemming from issues related to addiction, personality, or trauma. She is a lifelong learner, committed to understanding the complexities of mental health and advocating for practical, impactful solutions.Learn more at repkepsychologicalservices.comBooks mentioned (these are paid links):Thanks for the Feedback, by Douglas Stone and Sheila HeenThe Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, by Eleanor PaysonA Game Free Life, by Stephen KarpmanTake the Husband Material Journey... Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy Thanks for listening!

What's worth more than a good paycheck? It's a strong, positive work culture! But what does it take to create one, and how do you know when you have it? To demystify what team members truly want in their work environment, Kirk Behrendt brings back Miranda Beeson, ACT's director of education, with a framework for understanding and creating a great team culture. Paying people more won't solve your problems! To learn how to give your team the best emotional paycheck, listen to Episode 835 of The Best Practices Show!Learn More About Miranda:Send Miranda an email: miranda@actdental.com Follow Miranda on ACT's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/actdentalRegister for ACT's To The Top Study Club (January 17, 2025): https://www.eventbrite.com/e/climb-with-us-register-for-january-17-2025-ttt-study-club-tickets-1012930712027Register for ACT's To The Top Study Club (January 24, 2025): https://www.eventbrite.com/e/climb-with-us-register-for-january-24-2025-ttt-study-club-tickets-1012960511157Register for ACT's BPA: https://www.actdental.com/bpaSend Gina an email: gina@actdental.com More Helpful Links for a Better Practice & a Better Life:Subscribe to The Best Practices Show: https://the-best-practices-show.captivate.fm/listenJoin The Best Practices Association: https://www.actdental.com/bpaJoin ACT's To The Top Study Club: https://www.actdental.com/tttSee the ACT Dental/BPA Live Event Schedule: https://www.actdental.com/eventGet The Best Practices Magazine for free: https://www.actdental.com/magazinePlease leave us a review on the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-best-practices-show-with-kirk-behrendt/id1223838218Episode Resources:Watch the video version of Episode 835: https://www.youtube.com/@actdental/videosDownload ACT's Right People Scorecard resource: https://23476641.fs1.hubspotusercontent-na1.net/hubfs/23476641/Instructions%20for%20Right%20People%20Scorecard.pdfRead Radical Candor by Kim Scott: https://www.radicalcandor.com/the-bookRead Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen:

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.ktfpress.comIn this month's bonus episode, we talk all about why and how to have difficult conversations about important political subjects with people who disagree with you. We get into:- What are goals are in these kinds of conversations- Strategies for regulating our emotions and achieving those goals- The power dynamics to keep in mind when having these conversations- And afterward, our segment Which Tab Is Still Open?, diving into a fascinating conversation with Rev. William Barber about what Democrats could gain if they paid attention to poor votersYou can find the video of the portion of this episode that we recorded live at ktfpress.com.Mentioned in the episode- Disarming Leviathan by Caleb Campbell- The Deeply Formed Life by Rich Villodas- Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Pete Scazzero- When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert- Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Shila Heen- Crucial Conversations by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, and Ron McMillan- John Blake's interview with Rev. William BarberCredits- Follow KTF Press on Facebook, Instagram, and Threads- Follow host Jonathan Walton on Facebook Instagram, and Threads.- Follow host Sy Hoekstra on Mastodon.- Our theme song is “Citizens” by Jon Guerra – listen to the whole song on Spotify.- Our podcast art is by Robyn Burgess – follow her and see her other work on Instagram.- Editing by Sy Hoekstra- Transcripts by Joyce Ambale and Sy Hoekstra.- Production by Sy Hoekstra and our incredible subscribersTranscriptIntroduction[An acoustic guitar softly plays six notes, the first three ascending and the last three descending – F#, B#, E, D#, B – with a keyboard pad playing the note B in the background. Both fade out as Jonathan Walton says “This is a KTF Press podcast.”]Sy Hoekstra: Hey everyone, it's Sy. Quick note before we start. Stay tuned after this recording of our conversation, which we did on Substack Live because we recorded our segment, Which Tab Is Still Open, separately due to some time constraints we had. Thanks so much for listening, and the episode officially starts now.Jonathan Walton: If your relationship is broken by what you think about trans rights, then I think we need to examine what kind of relationship you had in the first place, because I think our relationships have to be much more than our opinions about the latest political topic of the day.[The song “Citizens” by Jon Guerra fades in. Lyrics: “I need to know there is justice/ That it will roll in abundance/ And that you're building a city/ Where we arrive as immigrants/ And you call us citizens/ And you welcome us as children home.” The song fades out.]Jonathan Walton: Welcome to Shake the Dust, seeking… [long pause] Jesus, confronting injustice. I am Jonathan Walton [laughter], and we're live on Substack.Sy Hoekstra: Jonathan starts the live by forgetting our tagline [laughter].Jonathan Walton: It's true. It's true. So welcome to Shake the Dust. My name is Jonathan. We are seeking justice, confronting injustice. See, this is live. Live is hard. Go for it, Sy.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Thank you for being here, Sy.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah, sure. I'm Sy Hoekstra, that's Jonathan Walton.Jonathan Walton: [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: We're doing this live, if you couldn't tell. This is a live recording of our podcast. We are gonna ease into it, and then we'll be good. Don't worry.Jonathan Walton: [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: We're doing this live as a recording, and then we will be releasing the audio and the video later to our paid subscribers. So if you're listening, welcome. Alright, we are gonna be talking today about a subject that comes to us from a listener that came in as a question on our finale episode, but it came in a couple hours too late, and I missed it before we started recording. But it was such an interesting question that we decided to make a whole episode out of it. So thank you to Ashley, our listener, who sent this in. We will be talking about basically, how to regulate yourself and actually strategies you can employ when having difficult conversations with people you disagree with on important subjects, the power dynamics and everything all around it, and literally just how to do it, which is actually kind of something that a lot of people have been asking us.Ashley comes at it from a really good angle that we'll be talking about too. So we'll get to all that in a moment. We will also be talking, as we usually do in our episodes, doing our segment, Which Tab Is Still Open, diving a little bit deeper into one of the recommendations from our newsletter. And this week, we will be talking about a really great interview with William Barber, the Reverend William Barber, and basically how poor people can but often don't affect elections because of the ways that the Republican and Democratic parties approach poor people. So we will get into all that in a second. I will apologize for my voice still sounding like I have a cold. It sounds like I have a cold because I have a cold, and [laughter] I have the eternal fall-winter, father of a two year old in daycare cold [laughs]. So bear with me, and I appreciate your patience. Before we get into all this, Jonathan Walton, go ahead.Jonathan Walton: Well, if you are listening live, thank you, thank you, thank you so much for tuning in, and I just wanna encourage you to become a paid subscriber of our Substack. If you do that, you get access to video and audio of this conversation afterwards, you also get bonus episodes and our entire archive of bonus episodes as well. Plus, when you become a monthly paid subscriber, you also get access to our monthly Zoom chats, and you'll be able to comment on our posts, communicate with us on a regular basis. And so that would be great. Plus, you'll be supporting everything that we can do to help Christians confront injustice and follow Jesus. And so that's particularly in the areas of political discipleship and education, as we try to leave behind the idols of the American church. And for everybody, if you do listen to this, please go to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you might listen, and give us a five-star rating. If you wanna give less than that, you can also but you can keep that to yourself.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Thank you so much for your support and encouragement. We really appreciate it.Sy Hoekstra: Four stars and below, give us those ratings inside your head [laughter]. Also, if you have any questions and you are listening live, feel free to put them in the chat. We can answer those as we go. And alright, Jonathan, let's jump right into it.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: We got this question from Ashley. She comes at it from an interesting angle. I wanted to talk about the things that she doesn't wanna do, and then get into her questions. So she said, when she's talking about people that she disagrees with on important political or religious subjects, there's a couple of things that she did growing up. One of which was the only reason that you're engaging in these conversations as a conservative Evangelical, is to change people into you [laughs]. Is to win people over to your point of view and make them the same as you. That's your goal. Then she said she kind of grew up a little bit, went to college, became what she called it, an ungrounded liberal arts major [laughs] and started getting into what she described as the sort of millennial slash Gen Z cusp age that she is.Just it being cool to shut people down and just defeat them, destroy them in an argument. So she's just like, “I don't wanna be there just to make people into me. I don't wanna be there just to destroy people.” But she said now she finds herself in a position where most of the people around her largely agree with her on important subjects, and she just doesn't spend a lot of time around people who don't. So just kind of wants to know how to get into that, because she thinks it is important. She was saying some political organizers really convinced her that it is important to be doing that. And she just wants to know how you regulate yourself, how you go about it, and all that.What's the Goal When You're Having Difficult Disagreements on Important Subjects?Sy Hoekstra: And although that question was really interesting, and we're gonna jump into the actual strategies, I think Jonathan, the place to start is when you're having these conversations with someone, if you're not trying to cut them off, if you're not trying to turn them into you, and you're not trying to shut them down, what are you trying to do? What's the actual goal of what these conversations are? And for those of you who might be listening live or listening to us for the first time, this is Jonathan's wheelhouse [laughter]. This is right in what Jonathan does all the time. So Jonathan, go ahead, tell us what is the actual goal of these conversations?Jonathan Walton: Yes. So I wanna start off by saying that none of this is easy.Sy Hoekstra: For sure.Jonathan Walton: I'm giving you a cookie cutter, boxed up wonderful version of a cake that you don't… Like all the ingredients are in there, all you need to do is add water. And life is not like that.Sy Hoekstra: Yes.The Goal Should Be Connection, not Cutting off or ColonizingJonathan Walton: But if you're not trying to colonize someone or make them into you, and you're not trying to cut someone off just because they disagree with you, or you're not trying to cancel them, shut them down, hold them accountable in a way that leaves them feeling like a puddle of ignorance in front of you, then what you're actually trying to do is connect with them. And so I think that God made us to be in relationship with other people, and being in relationship with other people means that we're able to sit before them, to see and be seen, without trying to consume or control the other person. It's impossible to connect with someone that you're trying to control. It's impossible to connect with someone, to love someone that you're trying to consume, like to be enmeshed with and turn into yourself.And so I think one of the ways that we, what we're actually trying to do, instead of colonizing someone, instead of consuming someone, instead of controlling someone, is to connect with them. And so the foundational question that we need to ask ourselves when we're in conversations with someone who we disagree with is, “What do we want from the relationship?” So, yeah, we want to connect. And then we ask ourselves the deeper questions, hey, Ashley, [laughter] a deeper question of, “What kind of connection do I want with this person?” So for example, I know a couple. They voted differently in the election.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs] Than each other, or than you?Jonathan Walton: Yeah. Than each other.Sy Hoekstra: Okay.Jonathan Walton: I don't know if how I voted will even come up, because that wasn't the premise of the conversation.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: But this couple, their actual argument is not about like you voted for Trump and you wanted him not to vote for him. The actual thing is, how do we love each other amidst a disagreement? Because they don't know how to hold the reality that I believe something different from you and we can still remain connected. The only option they have is to consume the other person or calling them out, “You need to think like me.” Or be consumed, “I need to think like you.” Or, “Do we need to get a divorce?” Like, no. It is possible to remain connected to someone while being in disagreement, even vehement disagreement. I think what we actually need to agree on is, how do we wanna be connected? I think that's the foundational question.Connection Versus ConversionSy Hoekstra: Yeah. I like that a lot. It's funny, when we were talking about this, this did not… I don't do emotional health and relationship discipleship and all that kind of thing that Jonathan does all the time. And your answer did not immediately occur to me [laughs]. I was thinking about Ashley's question, and I was like, “Wait a minute, what is the goal? I don't even know.” Anyways, I think the framework of connection is super, super helpful, and I appreciate you laying it out for us. And it's helpful for a couple of reasons. One is, it roots us in actual relationships, meaning your real life circumstances are what's guiding you. Your goals in your relationships is what is guiding you in how you approach the question of how you have these conversations.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: And then it's something that is sort of an antidote to that evangelical tendency to try to convert everyone, like you were talking about.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: Meaning, it's like, if you have a separate goal, then you can leave those other goals behind. But those other goals, if you don't have a new goal, those goals always stick. How you were raised is not going to change or move or be as prominent in your mind if you're not replacing it with something else.Jonathan Walton: Yeah, yeah.Sy Hoekstra: It's something that you can focus on, that you can actually do. Meaning you can make as much of an effort as you can to connect with someone, and they might not work, but you know that you did everything that you could, as opposed to trying to change someone. If your goal is changing people or defeating people, that never works. It very rarely works. And this is a weird thing that a lot of, I've realized growing up in evangelical churches, you couldn't face this directly, the fact that the overwhelming attempts that you made to evangelize someone didn't work [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yeah. Right.Sy Hoekstra: That was just a reality that you had to ignore. The vast majority of the people that you tried, they ignored you and walked on their way. And you couldn't just stop and go like, “Maybe the thing that I'm offering them is actually not all that attractive [laughs]. Maybe the church or the community or whatever, is getting in the way of…” That stuff you couldn't face. You had to believe that you had the best way, and you had to change people, or you had to shut them down. You had to shut down your opponents if you were talking about, atheists or whatever. And that stuff, it leads to constant anxiety, because you don't control the outcome, but you want to.You feel like you have to control the outcome, but you do not control the outcome. And when it comes to connection, again, you don't control the outcome, but the goal is that you attempt, you do everything that's in your power to attempt to reach your goal of connection with this person.Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And then it also filters out the people that you don't need to have a connection with [laughter].Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: You don't have to respond to trolls. You know what I'm saying? You don't have to convert everyone. Because you're not trying to do all those things, it takes a lot of pressure off you. But I'm sorry, you were trying to say something. Go ahead.Jonathan Walton: Well, no, I think just to give some other resources, I'm pulling from Disarming Leviathan by Caleb Campbell. I'm pulling from Deeply Formed Life by Rich Villodas. I'm pulling from Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Pete Scazzero. I'm pulling from Difficult Conversations. There's like, Crucial Conversations and Difficult Conversations and I get them mixed up.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs].Jonathan Walton: And also I'm pulling from When Helping Hurts. Because, oftentimes too, When Helping Hurts, I think it's really good, because we can start out with really good intentions, with trying to do something, quote- unquote, good for someone, when I think in reality what Sy was saying is true. We can only control what we desire, how we communicate that desire, and then pursuit of that desire.There is Vulnerability in Pursuing Connection as a GoalJonathan Walton: And then the other person actually gets to respond to that. And what's difficult about being vulnerable in connecting is that if you're trying to convert someone or control someone or colonize someone, they are rejecting a message or an idea. Or is it whereas if you are trying to connect with someone, you could feel rejected.And I think it's easier to try and persuade someone, or convince someone of an idea, rather than it is to connect with you as a person. I've been rejected by people, not just romantically [laughter].Sy Hoekstra: That too, though.Jonathan Walton: And it hurts. That as well. It's true. Tears.Sy Hoekstra: Sorry [laughter].Jonathan Walton: But one of the things is… No, it's cool. It's alright. Things worked out, praise God. But I think there's a vulnerability in, let's say I'm having a conversation with someone and they say, “Hey, Jonathan, I don't actually believe that police reform should happen. I think it's a few bad apples.” I have a few ways to go in that conversation. I could say, “Hey. Have you seen these statistics from this magazine and these FBI reports?” And go down deep into why Memphis is rejecting federal oversight. I could do that. Or I could say, “Oh, I feel afraid when you say that, because the results of that are, I'm afraid to walk outside my house because there aren't people actively pushing for reforms in the police department that occupies my neighborhood.”And that is vulnerability, because they could then invalidate my fears with their response, or whatever the thing is, but I think that that's the costly work of following Jesus in those moments.You Don't Need to Have Conversations with People Whose Goals Are Not ConnectionSy Hoekstra: Yeah. And just one more note on the goal, because we're starting to get into how these conversations actually work. But I did just wanna say one more thing about the overall goal of connection first before we move into that, just because I think this one is important. Especially for people who do ministry work of some kind, or talk about the kind of things that we talk about publicly, is if your goal is connection and the other person's goal is not connection, that's another reason that you don't have to talk to them [laughs]. Meaning, here's what I'm talking about here. I've seen you, Jonathan, in situations with people who do the kind of classic Christian thing when they disagree with something you're saying in public. They come to you and they say, “Hey, I've heard you talking about, let's say, police brutality. And I have some thoughts, I was wondering if we could just talk about it. Could we set up some time to have a Zoom?”And I've seen you go like, say to this person in not so many words basically, “I don't actually think that your goal is to have a conversation right now. I think you're upset with what I'm saying and you want to try and change me. Is that correct?”Jonathan Walton: Yeah [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: You just said that to them, and not rudely. You put it in kind words, but you're just like, “Am I right in thinking that that's really what you want here?” And if they can't say no, then you will say, “Okay, I'm sorry. I don't really think I have time for this,” [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And move on. Which is something that I don't think a lot of ministers feel the need to do. But if someone is cutting off the possibility of connection from the jump, and all they're saying is, “I want to change you,” or they're refusing to not say that all they want is to change you, [laughs] you don't have to talk to them. You have no responsibility to talk to that person because you don't have a responsibility to get into an argument with anyone. Even as a pastor. Your responsibility is to shepherd people and to lead people, and if our conversation is just going to be an argument, you don't have to talk to them. You may still want to, everything I say is subject to your personal relationships with people and your individual circumstances, but that's an option, and I want more people to know that [laughs], because I think a lot of people spend a lot of time trying to just win arguments when they don't need to be having them.Winning Arguments Is Not What Leads to RepentanceJonathan Walton: Yeah. And also too, I think we've misidentified what the fruit of a won argument is.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: So for example, if I preach a sermon, or I have a conversation with a small group of people and I give a call to faith, and someone decides to follow Jesus, I did not win an argument. They're not saying I have the best ideas, or I presented things in a really compelling way, none of that is happening. What's happening is the Holy Spirit is working within them for them to respond in some way. It's the kindness of God that leads to repentance. The Gospel is the power and transformation. I can't say, “You know what? What I drew on that napkin, or what I put in that card, when the PowerPoint slide opened and everybody went, ooh,” like, no. That was not the power. It is the power of God that draws people nigh into himself.Sy Hoekstra: Nigh unto himself [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yes. KJV baby. KJV [laughter].How Do We Achieve Connection in Difficult Conversations?Sy Hoekstra: So let's get into then the actual strategies and kind of the meat of the question.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: That's it. Let's get into, how do you regulate yourself and what do you actually do to achieve the goal of connection?We Have to Know Ourselves to Connect with OthersJonathan Walton: Yeah, so I think the first thing is that we can't know other people unless we know ourselves. So for example, if… let's say I was having a conversation over the weekend with someone, and they said to me, “Well, I can't believe they would think that way.” And then I said, “Well, if I were in your situation, I would be pretty angry at that response. Are you upset? Do you feel angry?” I have to know, and be willing to name that I would be angry. I have to know, and be willing to imagine, like how to empathize. Like I'm listening to them, then I wanna empathize with how they're feeling, and then ask them, “Does that resonate with you?” To build some sort of emotional connection so that we stay grounded in them as an individual and not stepping up to the argument. Like “Oh, yeah. Absolutely, what they did was wrong.”I don't wanna participate in condemning other people either. I wanna connect with this person. We could commiserate around what happened, but I think we should prioritize what is happening for the person right in front of me, not just rehashing what happened to them. You know what I mean? Like figure out what's going on. So I think we have to know ourselves to be able to know other people, which includes that emotional awareness and intelligence. And then I think after that, we should affirm what's true about that person. And then, if we've done that, then be able to ask some questions or share our own perspective.Sy Hoekstra: Or what's true about what they're saying.Jonathan Walton: Yes, what's true about what they're saying, yeah. And then be able to lean in there. And if there is an opportunity and the person desires to hear what you think about it, then that's great, but I guarantee you, they will not wanna hear about what you're saying if you don't connect with them first. And so creating or building a foundation of trust that you're not trying to just convert them or consume them or colonize them, but you are trying to connect requires that first part. So slowing down, then knowing how we feel, and then being able to connect around that level is a great place to start.Connect with Whatever Is True in What the Other Person Is SayingSy Hoekstra: Can you tell us what finding what's true and what someone is saying and then affirming that value, what does that actually sound like?Jonathan Walton: Yes, absolutely. So let's go to a different script. There was a woman that had a conversation with me and was very upset that Black people could vote for Trump. This was a racially assigned White woman saying these things. And she was, I mean, raising her voice very loud, and so I said my goal… I did actually speak over her. I said, “So my goal in this conversation is for us as a group to remain connected and aware of each other and ourselves. What is your goal in what you're saying?” And I think that kind of threw cold water in her face because she didn't know what to do with that. And so she slowed down, then she said, “Well, I don't know. I haven't processed anything,” that was kind of what she blurted out.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah. I knew that, actually [laughter].Jonathan Walton: Yeah. And I said, “It's great that like you need… this is a space to process.” I said, “What I would love for you to do is to slow down and tell us what you want, because I don't think you want me to be angry, and that's actually how I'm feeling right now. Was that your goal, was for me to feel angry and disconnected from you?” And she goes, “Well, you shouldn't be mad at me.” I said, “I can own my feelings. I didn't say you made me angry. I said my feeling in what you're saying is anger. Is that your intention? Is that what you're trying to foster? Because I would actually like to have my emotional response match your intent.” And it was not an easy conversation, but she did say after about 15 minutes of this kind of back and forth, she said, “I wanted to just close my computer,” is what she said, “But I didn't.” And then I said, “I'm so glad you chose to stay.”Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: “I'm so glad you chose to remain in our group. And to affirm again, you are valuable here, we desire your contribution and things like that.”Sy Hoekstra: And you were specifically in like a cohort that you were leading.Jonathan Walton: And I think it is hard to move towards someone who… Yeah, I was leading. I was leading. And everybody else was silent. They were not saying anything, but I had follow up conversations with one person after that, who said they were very grateful that I did that, because they were like, “I didn't know that you could be patient like that with someone so animated.” They were like, “I don't understand how you were calm in that situation.” I said, “Well, I was calm because I knew who I was. I was facilitating the conversation. I was leading the dialogue.” And I said, “When I'm with my mom,” not my mom, my mom passed away. “But if I was with my dad or my brothers in that conversation, I would have to do the same thing, but it will require more work because of the emotional history that's there. This history of my family and stuff under the bridge.”So each relationship is gonna bring with it its own porcupine quills, if you will, but that doesn't mean our steps change. I think our goal is to love our neighbor as ourselves. And if we don't know ourselves, we can't love our neighbors. So in the way that we would want patience and want grace and want respect, I think we need to extend that as best as we possibly can by trying to build a connection.Sy Hoekstra: And if you're talking about, I think that's really good for a discipleship situation. Anybody who disciples people, I hope you just learned something from that story [laughs]. But if you're having, by the way, Jonathan, I've noticed as we're talking, there's a very long delay. So I apologize.Jonathan Walton: No worries.Sy Hoekstra: I just interrupted you with something that was related to something you said like three sentences later, I'm sorry [laughs].Jonathan Walton: You're all good [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: So I think when it comes to a political issue, if you're talking to someone who's saying something that you find very hurtful or very upsetting or whatever, which is where I think a lot of these questions come up for people. For a lot of people it's, “How do I talk to a Trump supporter?” That's kind of the question.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: And then, like Jonathan said, it's going to be very hard. It's going to depend on your relationship with that person. And this work can be hard. It's very hard to get people to talk about their emotions, but that's what we need to do when somebody's talking… if they're being very anti-immigrant. You need to find a way into how they're communicating and what they're saying as angry as they are, whatever. An underlying thing might be, “I feel insecure about the economy of our country, I feel insecure about my job. I feel like I'm not gonna be able to provide because somebody's gonna undercut me in wages or whatever.” All that stuff. And the way to connect with that person is to say, “That makes sense, that feeling. And if I felt that that was happening to me, I would also be insecure.”Maybe it is also happening to you, you know what I mean? You have to just find a way into that feeling, and then say, “But the way that I feel secure is X, Y and Z, about…” If you want to talk about solidarity and lifting everyone up actually makes all of us more secure. You can get into the nitty gritty of immigration and economics, if you know that stuff, and say [laughs], “Actually, in general, immigrants really help us economically. And so I actually feel more secure. I know that immigrants commit crime at lower rates than citizens. And I trust the numbers that say that, and that comes from police departments. We can go look at your police department stats. So immigrants coming in actually lowers crime. I know that's a shock, but. So I feel more secure.” All that kind of like, you try and find a way to connect on the emotion and speak in a… What I'm doing right now is summarizing and being slightly glib, but [laughs] I think that's the best you can do.People You Connect with May Not Change, or Take a Long Time to ChangeSy Hoekstra: And I know to some people, if you have a really obstinate person that feels hopeless and impossible, and I think what we're saying is you give it your best shot, and if it doesn't work, it doesn't work. And there's nothing you can do about it not working. And it might also be something, by the way, where you talk to them now and that's the beginning of a 10-year process of them changing.Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: You don't know. This is why I said that stuff's out of your hands, is what I mean. So that's where we need to find our own internal piece about it. And then, I don't know, there's a number of other thoughts I have about what you have to do to prepare for all that, like the prep work that goes into it. But do you have other thoughts about that, Jonathan?Jonathan Walton: Well, I mean, I think just all of what you said is true, and I just wanna lean into what you said about, you cannot rush the process of that relationship. Because if your relationship is broken by what you think about trans rights, then I think we need to examine what kind of relationship you had in the first place. Because I think our relationships have to be much more than our opinions about the latest political topic of the day. We've got to be able to have conversations with people that are deeper and contain the multitudes that a person holds, as opposed to the latest tweet or share that they had.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs].Jonathan Walton: We're talking with people, we're not talking with a minimally viable product that's before us like, “Do I want this or not in my life?” And so I think even in the, let's take the example, like Caleb Campbell did a great example of this immigration. If someone actually believed that they were going to be invaded, I'm making quotes with my fingers, but invaded and they're gonna lose their job and they're gonna lose their emotional and spiritual and social security, not Social Security like the actual entitlement program, but social security like their feeling of social safety, that is objectively terrifying. If that is the narrative, then we can actually connect with people around why they're afraid.And if we connect with them why they're afraid, not convince them why they shouldn't be scared, then you actually have the opportunity to share with them why they may not need to be afraid. Because, as Sy said, immigrants crime actually goes down. Immigrants actually pay billions of dollars in taxes. Immigrants actually start businesses at a higher rate than our native population. All those things, but we can't get there unless we're connected. We cannot correct people without connecting with them. So, yeah.Getting Good at Connection Takes PracticeSy Hoekstra: Yeah. I think this takes a ton of practice.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: You will be bad at it at first, and that's [laughter]… So I think another part of it is you have to know why it's important to you. That's another thing, and that's a personal thing. But you have to understand why connection with someone whose political beliefs or whatever you find kind of abhorrent [laughs] is something that is important to you, that work has to be done on your own and ahead of time.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: You also have to take into account… sorry. You'll just get better at it over time. So meaning it, I'd say it's only like in the last few years that I've really been able to participate in extremely difficult conversations about politics or whatever, and just be okay [laughter], no matter what the consequence of it is. And sometimes that's still not true, depending on the relationship I have with the person, but I don't know. You've got to remember that people… actually, at the beginning I remember I told you she talked about, as a young person or as millennials and Gen Z wanting to shut people down. And I actually don't think that's a generational thing. I think that's just a young people thing.I think when I was 22 I thought it was awesome to shut people down [laughs]. And I think all the most recent, this is something I know from justice advocacy work, but all the recent neurology science basically tells us you don't have an adult brain until you're like 25 [laughter]. You don't have your impulse control, you know what I mean? It's just hard.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: And it just takes time to retrain yourself to do something, It can take years. So fear not, is what I'm saying, if you think you're bad at this.Being Aware of How Much You Know about a SubjectSy Hoekstra: And then I think something that's kind of deceptively emotional is the things that don't seem emotional, like knowing your facts and being able to bow out of conversations when you don't know your facts [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: Like if you have a feeling that something's wrong, but somebody's saying something wrong, or bigoted, or whatever, but you don't have the information, A, it's gonna make you much more comfortable if you do have the information, if you've read up on it, if you know the subjects. Because you find as you dig deeper into different political issues and hot button topics, there really are only so many opinions that people have, and they're usually based on relatively shallow understandings of information. So you can know a lot of the arguments ahead of time. You can know a lot of the important facts ahead of time. You've just kind of got to pay attention and that's something that happens over time.And then if you don't know that stuff, and you try and engage anyway just based on instinct, you're gonna have a lot of times where you say stuff that you regret later [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yes. Yes.Sy Hoekstra: You're gonna have a lot of times where you maybe even make up something just because you wanna be right and you wanna win.Jonathan Walton: Yes, you wanna win.Sy Hoekstra: And then bowing out and letting someone believe their terrible thing without you fighting against it, sometimes that can be really hard, but that's an emotional issue, that's something about you being…Jonathan Walton: Right. That's a feeling. Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah. It's always gonna be feelings, and that's why you got to have your goals clear, and whenever you can, know your stuff.Jonathan Walton: Yeah. Adam just said something, really quick. He said, “I've literally had notification of high heart rate from my Apple watch during such conversations.”Sy Hoekstra: [laughs] Yes.Jonathan Walton: And being able to have conversations without a high heart rate notification is becoming more normal.Sy Hoekstra: Yes. Good.Jonathan Walton: Yes, that has happened to me so many times. And it's true. It's fewer, it's less than what it was before that.Sy Hoekstra: That's so funny. I don't have a smart watch, so that's never happened to me, but that's so funny. And I'm glad that it's improving for both of you [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yeah. And it's a way to track if your spiritual formation's actually forming you [laughter].Sy Hoekstra: True.Engaging in Hard Conversations with Connection as a Goal is ExhaustingSy Hoekstra: So one more thing though is, this is exhausting.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: One of the reasons it's exhausting is not just because the whole thing is hard, but the issue is no one's ever gonna come to you, again, I guess, unless you're a pastor, and say, “Hey, next Wednesday at 4:00 pm I wanna talk to you about immigration.”Jonathan Walton: Right [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: They're going to come to you, you're gonna be having a dinner, and there's gonna be a completely random out of nowhere comment that you do not expect coming and your instinct may be in that moment to get angry or to just let it pass because you don't wanna deal with right now or whatever. And all that you have to take that into account. Again, over time it'll get easier to respond to random acts of racist bigotry, whatever. You know what I mean?Jonathan Walton: [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: But it is something that's hard to do for anyone, and so you need to take the exhaustion of constantly being on alert into account when you think about, how do I wanna connect with this person? Because if it's someone where you have to be on alert the whole time and ready to go at any moment [laughs], that's difficult. And that's somebody that you might need to hang out with less or whatever.Jonathan Walton: Yes. Yes.Sy Hoekstra: You have to make those decisions for yourself. And so I'm just saying, be willing to take that into account. Be alert to that way that you can become exhausted. Because, again, if you're really tired and you just have a snap reaction, you can say stuff you regret later.Jonathan Walton: Yes. Yes.Sy Hoekstra: Alright, Jonathan. Do you have… Yeah, you have thoughts. Go ahead and then we'll get to...Jonathan Walton: No, I was gonna say, off all of that, I think is mitigated by asking myself, “What kind of connection do I want with this person?”Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: And all of us have relationships that are not as healthy as we'd like them to be. And if my goal is not to convert someone or I don't feel this like abnormal, huge weight of this person's salvation, because that's not my responsibility, then I can say, “You know what? I just can't be with that person right now. I just can't do that.” And be able to enter into that in a healthier way, and it'll be a more loving thing.The Power Dynamics of Difficult ConversationsSy Hoekstra: Yeah, absolutely. Let's just get into, I think that's a lot of the meat of it, but let's talk about just some of the power dynamics and other things that are going on during these conversations. Jonathan, I'm happy to start if you want, but you can go ahead if you have some things you wanna flag for people.Jonathan Walton: Well, I think if we're not thinking about power dynamics then we're missing what's actually happening. So when men to women, able-bodied to disable-bodied, rich to poor, educated to uneducated. All of these things are playing all the time. So somebody's like, “Oh, you're playing the race card, or you're being ageist,” that's just the table. It's not a card. That's just the society we live in. We live in a segregated, stratified society. And so to be able to be aware of that, I think respects whether you are in the ecosystem or whether you've been lifted up by the ecosystem because of the hierarchies that we live in. I think that's just something we have to take into account of where we are and where the person that we are engaging with is or is perceived to be, then that can be a gift, just in the conversation. Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: So that's sort of like keeping in mind whether you're talking to someone who's basically [laughs] above or below you on different hierarchies, which is gonna be important. Like, if you're talking, if I as a White person am talking to a Black person about race, I have to understand the dynamics. For me, at least, what I'm thinking about is I have to be personally familiar with the stuff that Black people hear all the time [laughs], and how it is often heard, and that sort of thing. Not because I need to apply a monolithic understanding of race conversations to any individual, but just to know that that individual is probably going to hear something I say this way, or feel this way about something.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: I'm sorry about the sirens in my background. I live in Manhattan [laughter]. So I think that's one thing. But then the other way is I as a disabled person, if I'm trying to talk to an able-bodied person about disability stuff, I just need to take into account how much more tiring that's going to be, and the work that I may have to do after the conversation to process whatever terribly insulting thing was said to me [laughter].Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And I do that all the time. That's something I have to do when I get home from dropping my daughter off at daycare. It just depends on what happened on the way there, or whatever. Another thing is that the, a person you're talking to can always walk away [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: Nobody needs to be in this conversation, and that you need to be able to accept that. You need to be able to let people go the way that Jesus did when they rejected his teachings. Because if you don't do that and [laughs] you try and force them into conversations with you, again, that's what we're trying to avoid doing, is panicking about the results and trying to make somebody like you because you think the world needs to be the way that you are. That's the colonialist mindset [laughs].Jonathan Walton: Yes [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: And then I think one other thing for me is how the person… this is back on the hierarchy thing. How what somebody else is saying is affecting other people around you, or the other person that that person has to interact with. Meaning the person that you're trying to connect with might be someone, like not the person you're talking to. It might be somebody who's sitting next to you, it might be somebody who's not there.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: So that's just the other thing to keep in mind, because you might be trying to show somebody else that they have support, that's a huge thing. That's the person who you have a conversation with after your cohort call that you were talking about earlier. And it might be just like, if I'm talking to another White person and I know, actually doesn't matter if I know them or not, but if I'm talking about connection, if I know people of color who have to talk to this person and they're saying something that I think I can head off or correct in some way, then I should do that. And I should keep in mind my connection with that White person, but I've also top of mind it's gonna be the connection that I have with people of color who interact with that person too.Okay, those are my thoughts on that big question. Jonathan, do we have anything else to say about these conversations before we move to Which Tab Is Still Open?Jonathan Walton: [laughs] Well, I don't have anything more to say about that conversation. I do have two problems that our live audience will get to engage with.Sy Hoekstra: [laughs].Jonathan Walton: One is that I need to get… it's one o'clock.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: And so I have a time stop.Sy Hoekstra: Right now?Jonathan Walton: Yeah. And my phone is also telling me, yeah, because I was thinking, I didn't know we're gonna talk past one o'clock, but…Sy Hoekstra: [laughter] Well, we started like 12:15 so.Jonathan Walton: We did. We did, we did. And then my phone as we entered into this conversation is on the red.Sy Hoekstra: Is about to die. Alright, cool. So then I think what we'll do, Jonathan, is we'll record the Which Tab Is Still Open separately, and just add that to the bonus episode.Jonathan Walton: Absolutely.Sy Hoekstra: So again, everybody, if you wanna hear the recordings of this afterwards, and now I guess the extended version of this episode, become a paid subscriber at KTFPress.com, or just on, you're on Substack right now if you're listening to us. Become a paid subscriber, that would be amazing. If you wanna get our newsletter that's actually free, you can follow us on the free list and get us that way. Thank you so much for joining us today, we really appreciate it. Give us a five-star review on Apple or Spotify and we will see you next month. We do these once a month now that we're in the off season. And our theme song is “Citizens”, by Jon Guerra. Our podcast art is by Robyn Burgess. Joyce Ambale does the transcripts. I'm doing the editing right now and the production of this show, along with our paid subscribers. Thank you all so much for joining us, and we will hopefully see you next month or on the paid list.Jonathan Walton: Yep, bye.Sy: Bye.[the intro piano music from “Citizens” by Jon Guerra plays briefly and then fades out.]Which Tab Is Still Open?: Rev. William Barber and Poor VotersSy Hoekstra: And now this is the separate recording of Which Tab Is Still Open. We're gonna dive a little bit deeper into one of the articles from the newsletter that Jonathan brought up recently. Jonathan, why don't you tell us about the article, and we'll get into a little discussion about it.Jonathan Walton: Yes. So our good friend, John Blake, award winning journalists and former guest on this podcast interviewed Reverend Dr William Barber on his thoughts after the election. It was one of the most interesting things I read post-election, because Dr Barber has a perspective most politicians and pundits just don't. He takes a perspective of poor people seriously, like Jesus [laughter]. And so one of the things he argues was that about 30 million poor people who are eligible voters usually don't vote because neither party is addressing the issues that are important to them, like minimum wage, affordable health care, strengthening unions, etc.There was talk about strengthening unions, but not in the ways that communicate about the needs and priorities of low wage and poor workers. Republicans mostly blame poor people for their poverty, that is a consistent thing over the last 60 years. And Democrats ignore them altogether because they see them not as a viable voting block to mobilize, we should get middle class voters, which is not the same as the working poor. Barber has a history of successfully organizing multiracial coalitions of poor working class people in North Carolina to make real difference in elections. So it's not just a theoretical thing, like you can actually win elections by doing what MLK did, which Barber is in the tradition of you can have a multicultural coalition of impoverished or economically impoverished, marginalized people in the United States and actually have and hold power in the country.So even as Kamala Harris lost in November in North Carolina, voters elected a Democratic Governor and Attorney General and got rid of the veto-proof majority in the state legislature, even with all of the nonsensical gerrymandering that exist there. So Sy, what are your thoughts on all this?Sy Hoekstra: Yeah. I'm very happy that somebody in the mainstream news is actually talking about this [laughs]. That's one thing. I just haven't heard... This is one of those things where if somebody, if the Democrats got this right, they could win a lot more. I don't know how much more, Reverend Barber is very optimistic about it. I haven't dug into the numbers the way that he has as a political organizer, but he basically says if you swing like 10 percent of the poor vote in any direction in many states, and you could change a whole lot of stuff.Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: I mean, you can read the article for his exact arguments. But it is definitely true that we don't address poor voters any real way, like we get stuck on, I've talked about this before, the bias toward, quote- unquote, real America, which sort of amounts to working and middle class White people and really does not address actually impoverished people. And the average, Reverend Barber is very sensitive to this, which I think is why he's effective, is the average welfare recipient in the United States today is still White. That hasn't changed. Welfare recipients are disproportionately Black and Brown. But the demographics of this country are such that you can be disproportionately high as a racial minority, but White people are still gonna be the majority of the welfare recipients.Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And the potential interest alignment between those groups has always been intentionally broken up by elites in this country. And the thing that this raises for me is our constant, throughout our whole history, our belief that basically, poor people's opinions don't matter, that poor people's interests don't matter, and maybe poor people shouldn't even be voting in the first place. We had to have a movement in this country for universal White male suffrage [laughs] in the first few decades of this country, that was a fight. And the reason was they did not want you voting originally, if you didn't own property. And the belief behind that was, if you don't have property, then you don't have a stake in society. You don't have a sufficient stake in society to, I don't know, uphold the responsibility of voting.And in a lot of different ways that bias or that bigotry, frankly, has shot through a lot of different ways that we think about economics and politics. And just the idea like, it does not make sense to start with. If anything, the people with the most stake in how the government treats them are the people with the least power, with the with the way that society is run, are going to be the people who suffer the most when society is run poorly [laughs]. And the people who have the most independent wealth and power, meaning they can, regardless of what the government is doing, they're going to be generally alright, because they are wealthy landowners, if we're talking about the beginning of this country. They're actually kind of the least interested in how society runs, and maybe the most interested in maintaining the status quo and not having things change, which I think is what we're actually talking about.I think we're actually talking about not having significant change [laughs] in our economics, when we talk about the people who have the most quote- unquote, responsibility or the most sense of responsibility for how the society goes. And I think all of that bleeds into how both parties think today, because both parties are made up of elites. And I think there was this huge and terrible reaction to the CEO of United Healthcare being assassinated. And I was reading some stuff about it that basically said, if you're talking about healthcare, which is one of the issues that William Barber brought up, I think the reason that a lot of people don't understand the anger and the glee over the fact that this guy was killed online, which there was a ton of, which I don't support.But if you're trying to understand it there's so many elites who are the healthcare CEOs themselves, the politicians who write healthcare policy for whom, the biggest problem that health insurance is ever going to be is maybe a significant amount of paperwork. Maybe you get something declined or not covered, and you have to fight a little bit and then you get it covered again. It's not something that's going to bankrupt you or kill you. But that's a reality for many, many people around the country.Jonathan Walton: Yes.Sy Hoekstra: And if it's not bankrupt or kill, it's long, grinding trauma over a long period of time.Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And it's just so easy for us to lose sight of stuff like that and then not understand as a political party, why addressing those problems directly wouldn't matter. And when I say us in that case, I mean people who are economically comfortable and who have educated and are doing okay in this society. And so all this is what Barber's comments bring up for me is, he is trying to pay attention to real needs that real people have, and alert his party, the Democrats, to the fact that if they understood and paid attention to and took those needs seriously, they would have a ton of voters who nobody's counting on right now. Like there's no strategy around them.It's not you would be stealing voters from the Republicans, you would be bringing in a whole bunch of new voters and doing something that no one is expecting, and you'd be able to [laughs] actually make a big difference that way. Jonathan, if you have any thoughts or just your own responses to me, or your own thoughts.Jonathan Walton: Well, I think there's a there's a few things like, yeah, I'm grateful for John Blake and for media personalities that take the time to center the most marginalized people, because that was not the conversation. All the post mortem of the Democratic Party and the celebration of what Trump did, neither one of those things included real solutions for materially impoverished people in the United States. They were not a group of people that were, when you said, counted, it's literally they're not counted. They do not count in that way. There isn't analysis, there isn't engagement. And so that I think is deeply saddening. So I'm grateful for John Blake for highlighting it. I'm grateful for Barber for the work that he does.I think one of the things that highlights for me is the… because you use the word elite, and I think there was an essay a while ago that I read about the word elite and what it means and how we use it. Like Tucker Carlson says the elites, when in reality he is elite. Elite is Hell.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: The money that he makes, the universities that he went to, the position that he holds. Me and you are elite. We both have Ivy League educations, we both have graduate degrees. We are both financially secure, we are both educated and well connected. And the majority of, some of that, that I realize is that if I have those things I am insulated from the suffering that millions of people experience around health insurance. And because our classes in the United States are segregated and our churches are also often segregated, we are not going to have relationships with people that are struggling with these things. It's very difficult, at least for me, to live in Queens, to have conversations and relationships that are cross class.My children participate in activities that cost money. That's a proxy for a class decision. I drive, I do not take the train. That is a class communication. I live in a home and I own it, I do not rent. That's a class. I drive to a supermarket like Costco. You have to pay for a membership to be in Costco. These are all economic decisions, and there are going to be certain groups of people that I do not interact with every single day, because I have more money. And so I think if we stretch that out across the Democratic, Republican independent leadership in our country, the majority of us do not interact with people that are from a different class, higher or lower. And so we have these caricatures of what life looks like, which is why an executive can say it doesn't matter if we deny or defend or depose or delay or all the things that were written on these bullets that came from the person that killed the United Healthcare CEO.The reality is, I think we do not… I don't think, I know this, we do not prioritize the poor in this country. And to what you were saying, it's not that we don't prioritize poor and marginalized people, it's a strategic, intentional exclusion of them. So [laughs] like you said, the reality is, if you were not a wealthy land-owning White person, you were not allowed to vote or hold elected office. And so that's a reality. So each time a tier of people wanted to be included, there was an argument, there was a fight, there was war, there was violence. And so I believe that there is an opportunity that Barber is talking about too. It does not have to be violent to include people who are poor and marginalized.It's really just a decision to and the time and intentionality to do it. And I wish that the church did that. I wish that politicians did that. I wish that we did that as a society. And I recognize in my own life it is even still difficult to do because of how our society has set up invisible and very real fences between economic communities.Sy Hoekstra: And it's remarkable for you to say that in some ways. I mean, it makes sense that you would be the person to notice it, but it is remarkable in some ways for you to say it because you grew up as you've talked about many times, quite poor in the rural south.Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And you are actually directly connected to people who don't have a lot of money, right?Jonathan Walton: Right.Sy Hoekstra: And that's still your reality that your day to day life does not involve that many poor people.Jonathan Walton: Right. And that is, to be totally transparent, that is one of the hardest things about getting older and having children. When we go home, when I say home I'm thinking Brodnax.Sy Hoekstra: The small farming town in Virginia that you're from.Jonathan Walton: Yes. Where I'm from. It's exceptionally clear to me that the access that I have to resources, the decisions that I'm making each day are infused with the wealth and resources that surround me, just by virtue of the location that I live in. So we have to do really, really, really hard work to include people who are across classes in our lives, so that when we consider what we're going to do with our power, they are included in that decision. And I think Barber did a great job of explaining why that is strategically important as well.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah, so two points. One is, thank you for talking about that. For those of you who don't know, Jonathan and I are good friends. That's why I can say, “Hey Jonathan, let's talk about [laughs] your background as a poor person.”Jonathan Walton: Yeah [laughs].Sy Hoekstra: We've talked about this a ton on the show before, Jonathan is very open about it in public. And that, I actually think, hearing you talk about the tension and how your hometown is versus your new adopted home, a lot of that is actually part of the answer. Just people being willing to be totally open about their own financial circumstances, and the differences they see between places, because that is something that we hush up and we talk about, we make it shameful to talk about your money. We make it shameful for everyone to talk about their money. You're not supposed to talk about it if you're rich, you're not supposed to talk about it if you're poor [laughs]. You're basically only supposed to talk about it if you're right where the Republicans think real Americans are [laughter]. You know what I mean?Jonathan Walton: Yeah.Sy Hoekstra: And yeah, just being willing to talk about it openly and in a not ashamed way actually goes a long ways to breaking some of the taboos that hold the silence on these issues. That's one thing. The other thing is, you said at the end just now, that William Barber would argue that it is strategic to basically address the needs of the poor voters who are not voting. But earlier you said it is a strategic exclusion, or like a strategic that they're evading talking about these issues.Jonathan Walton: Oh yeah. So in the Constitution, there is a strategic exclusion of poor, marginalized, non-White-land-owning-educated-well-healed people. There's the intentional strategic exclusion of those people for the maintenance of power and dominance, right?Sy Hoekstra: Yeah.Jonathan Walton: And I think there needs to be a strategic, intentional inclusion of those people, and the intentional redistribution, and I know people hate that word, redistribution [laughs] of resources, so that people can be included in our society in a meaningful way.Sy Hoekstra: Well, Jonathan's a communist. You heard it here first.Jonathan Walton: [laughs] It's not the first time I've been accused of loving the Marx.Sy Hoekstra: Loving the… [laughs]. But I think the other aspect of it is just, the reality is that the donors that support both parties, these are not priorities of theirs. In fact, a lot of times they're opposed to the priorities of theirs. They are the healthcare CEOs. They are the people who have to negotiate against the unions. They are the people who would have to pay up the higher minimum wages. So that's part of the thing that makes it challenging. But Barber's been able to do the work [laughs] in North Carolina and make a difference there. And it's not… and he was one of the people, organizing like his is what made North Carolina a swing state in the first place from a traditionally deep red state. So it's worth trying, guys [laughs].Jonathan Walton: It is.Sy Hoekstra: Take a look, Democrats.Jonathan Walton: Worth trying.Sy Hoekstra: It's worth trying [laughs]. It's not just worth trying for political victories either. It's also worth actually addressing poor people's needs [laughs], to be clear about what I'm saying.Jonathan Walton: Yeah. And I think I was convicted. Like, Shane Claiborne said this and others like Merton has said this, and Howard Thurman said this, and MLK said it, and Jesus said it. The center of the church should be marginalized people. That should actually be the thing. “The poor will always be with us,” is not an endorsement of poverty. That's not what that is. You know what I mean? [laughter] Some people were like, “Well, people are supposed to be poor, and I'm supposed to…”Sy Hoekstra: I know. I know. Or, the poor will always be with us, and that means that we should not try to end poverty, because Jesus said you can't end it.Jonathan Walton: Yeah, right. That, no. But the reality that that is a broken, tragic theology that aligns with White American folk religion and requires no sacrifice from people who are on the upper end of a dominant hierarchy. That's what that is. Yeah. I hope that even if the political parties of the United States do not pay attention to what to what Barber is saying, that the Church will. That would be great.Sy Hoekstra: Yeah. Amen to that. Alright. I think we're just gonna end it there. I already did the outro and everything, the credits and all that stuff in the Live episode, so I think Jonathan and I at this point are just going to say thank you all so much for listening. We will see you in January for the next episode. Goodbye.Jonathan Walton: Thank you. Bye [laughter].[The song “Citizens” by Jon Guerra fades in. Lyrics: “I need to know there is justice/ That it will roll in abundance/ And that you're building a city/ Where we arrive as immigrants/ And you call us citizens/ And you welcome us as children home.” The song fades out.]Sy Hoekstra: How what somebody else is saying is affecting other people around you, or the other person that that person has to interact with, meaning the person who youJonathan Walton: [burps].Sy Hoekstra: [laughs], remember, I can't mute you if you just burp into your microphone.Jonathan Walton: Yes, sir. My apologies. [laughter] Welcome to live everyone.Sy Hoekstra: Welcome to live Substack.Jonathan Walton: I drank a ton of water. They saw me just do that [laughter].

Chapter 1:Summary of Thanks for the Feedback"Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well" by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen is a guide that focuses on how to effectively receive feedback in various contexts—whether it be in the workplace, personal relationships, or other areas of life. The authors, both affiliated with the Harvard Negotiation Project, explore the complexities of feedback and its role in personal and professional growth. Key Themes:1. Types of Feedback: The book categorizes feedback into three types: appreciation, coaching, and evaluation. Each type serves a different purpose, and understanding these distinctions can help individuals process feedback more effectively.2. The Challenge of Receiving Feedback: The authors discuss the emotional barriers that often prevent people from receiving feedback well, such as defensiveness, fear, and pride. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness in overcoming these barriers.3. The Feedback Loop: Stone and Heen highlight that receiving feedback is a two-way street. They encourage readers to think critically about how they seek and ask for feedback, as well as how they respond to it.4. Practical Strategies: The book provides practical advice on how to solicit feedback, manage one's emotional responses, and use feedback constructively. Techniques include asking clarifying questions, reframing feedback to gain perspective, and separating the content from the delivery.5. Cultivating a Feedback Culture: The authors stress the importance of creating environments—whether in organizations or personal relationships—where feedback is welcomed, valued, and encouraged.6. Mindset: A significant theme in the book is the idea of adopting a growth mindset, where individuals view feedback as an opportunity for growth rather than a personal affront. Conclusion:"Thanks for the Feedback" serves as a comprehensive resource for anyone looking to improve their ability to receive and utilize feedback effectively. The insights and strategies presented aim to help individuals embrace feedback as a tool for learning and personal development, ultimately fostering better communication and relationships. The book is both practical and filled with psychological insights, making it applicable in diverse life situations.Chapter 2:The Theme of Thanks for the Feedback"Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well," co-authored by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, explores the often uncomfortable but vital topic of receiving feedback in various contexts—personal, professional, and life in general. Here's a summary of key plot points, character development, and thematic ideas. Key Points1. The Feedback Process: The authors emphasize the element of receiving feedback, arguing that it is as crucial, if not more so, than giving feedback. They differentiate between the various types of feedback (evaluative, coaching, and appreciation) and how each serves a different purpose.2. The Nature of Feedback: The book discusses the complexities and challenges involved in receiving feedback, including emotional responses and biases that can color one's reaction. Stone and Heen delve into the reasons people might resist or struggle with feedback.3. Framework for Receiving Feedback: The authors outline a framework for effectively receiving feedback, which includes understanding one's triggers, separating the feedback from the person giving it, and knowing what to do with feedback after receiving it.4. Personal Stories and Examples: The use of anecdotes and relatable scenarios illustrates the principles laid out in the book. These stories often showcase different responses to feedback, demonstrating the varied ways people can react. Character DevelopmentWhile "Thanks for the...

No more avoiding talking about politics. Here's a framework you can use to talk to your friends about politics and still keep them as friends. No blowups, no ghosting, no shutting down. Life is too rich to avoid talking about some of the most important topics we deal with. I mentioned two books: 1. Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen2. Supercommunicators by Charles DuhiggAn easy way to send me a message? Click the link here.Have you enjoyed the podcast? If so, follow it, rate it, and share it with three people: Follow on Apple Podcasts Follow on Spotify Follow on Instagram Subscribe on YouTube If you want to share feedback, have a great idea, or have a question then email me: talktopeoplepodcast@gmail.comProduced by Capture Connection Studios: captureconnectionstudios.com

" If somebody is talking to us, they would like to be heard. They would like to have a sense of connection. They would like something to shift or to matter to us or something. And if they get the sense that that is possible and that we're available in a way that almost nobody is. That is way powerful."Karen & Paul emphasize the value of listening over speaking in effective communication.Links and items mentioned in this episode:How to Talk with Anyone about Anything by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly HuntThe Cooperative Culture Handbook by Yana Ludwig and Karen GimnigThanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well by Douglas Stone & Sheila HeenDifficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila HeenThe Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier

Astro themes of October! (00:01:33) October 1st - 2nd: Correction.  The Sun Mercury cazimi and the Libra eclipse - Something is wrong. (00:02:42) October 3rd - 7th: Analysis.  Mercury square Mars creating challenge in decision making. (00:04:07) October 8th - 13th: Intuition Mercury in Libra trine Jupiter in Gemini - Manifesting time! (00:07:11) October 14th - 19th: The beginning of transformation Venus opposite Uranus - What or who is draining your wealth and energetic resources? (00:12:34) October 20th - 24th: Refinement Mercury trine Saturn rx - Get clear headed on things. (00:15:30) October 25th - 31st: Picking your battles Mars sextile Uranus - A boost of freedom Books!!! (00:18:19) Aries Book Picks: Purpose, destiny and evolution of networks. The Crossroads of Should and Must: Find and Follow Your Passion by Elle Luna. The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference by Malcolm Gladwell. (00:19:05) Taurus Book Picks: Being unapologetically the self and evolution of your professional goals. Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone by Brené Brown The Lean Startup: How Today's Entrepreneurs Use Continuous Innovation to Create Radically Successful Businesses by Eric Ries (00:19:50) Gemini Book Picks: Making your own luck and intense spiritual growth The Luck Factor: The Four Essential Principles by Richard Wiseman The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer (00:20:20) Cancer Book Picks: Innovative visions and or Financial transformation Creative Confidence: Unleashing the Creative Potential Within Us All by Tom Kelley and David Kelley You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero (00:21:07) Leo Book Picks: Rebirth in alliances and the evolution of connections with others. Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts. by Brené Brown The Power of Connection: How Relationships Help Us Heal by Dr. David F. Drake (00:21:51) Virgo Book Picks: Deep focus on wellness and health regeneration. How Not to Die: Discover the Foods Scientifically Proven to Prevent and Reverse Disease by Dr. Michael Greger Lifeforce: How New Breakthroughs in Precision Medicine Can Transform the Quality of Your Life & Those You Love by Tony Robbins (00:22:53) Libra Book Picks: Taking a risk in making changes Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown The Art of Risk: The New Science of Courage, Caution, and Chance by Kayt Sukel (00:23:44) Scorpio Book Picks: Power struggles in work and/or family and rebirth of emotional foundations Family Ties That Bind: A Self-help Guide to Change Through Family of Origin Therapy by Dr. Ronald W. Richardson It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are by Mark Wolynn (00:24:20) Sagittarius Book Picks: Time is money and the evolution of managing your mindset Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness by Morgan Housel (00:25:05) Capricorn Book Picks: Control of wealth and developing motivated negotiations in partnerships  The Automatic Millionaire: A Powerful One-Step Plan to Live and Finish Rich by David Bachwhere Bach Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen (00:25:58) Aquarius Book Picks: Rebirth of identity and unconventional self-reinvention The Art of Possibility: Transforming Professional and Personal Life by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear (00:26:41) Pisces Book Picks: Letting go of the past and empowerment through surrender The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brené Brown. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life* by Mark Manson

Josh Eyler shares even more problems with grades on episode 533 of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast. Quotes from the episode Being a dad who is an educator takes things from the academic and intellectual and brings them immediately to the surface, to the real world and to the real consequences for students and families. -Josh Eyler The conflict between what we think and what we value and what we want for our kids and what the world and our school systems say are important can sometimes be almost irreconcilable. -Josh Eyler We need to create environments that will cultivate intrinsic motivation. -Josh Eyler In situations where grades are given, students tend to be more fearful of making mistakes. They produce more behaviors of trying to get the grade rather than learning. -Josh Eyler Grades are not objective accurate measurements of learning according to this research. -Josh Eyler If grades don't measure what they're supposed to measure, why are we using them, and why are we putting so much pressure on them? -Josh Eyler Resources Failing Our Future: How Grades Harm Students, and What We Can Do about It, by Josh Eyler How Humans Learn: The Science and Stories Behind Effective College Teaching, by Josh Eyler Kariann Fuqua Mind Over Monsters: Supporting Youth Mental Health with Compassionate Challenge, by Sara Rose Cavanaugh Coaching for Leaders Episode 310: How to Reduce Drama With Kids, with Tina Payne Bryson Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (Revised), by Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen* The Scarlet Letter, by Nathaniel Hawthorne* Punished by Rewards: The Trouble with Gold Stars, Incentive Plans, A'S, Praise, and Other Bribes, by Alfie Kohn* A meta-analysis on the impact of grades and comments on academic motivation and achievement: A case for written feedback, by Alison Koenka, et al. A Century of Grading Research: Meaning and Value in the Most Common Educational Measure, by Susan M. Brookhart, Thomas R. Guskey, et al. The Math Wars: Timed Tests, Math Anxiety, and the Battle Over How We Teach Our Kids, by Joshua Eyler for The Saturday Evening Post Off the Mark: How Grades, Ratings, and Rankings Undermine Learning (But Don't Have To) , by Jack Schneider & Ethan L. Hutt * The Test , by Anya Kamenetz  Lower Ed, by Tressie McMillan Cottom*

How good are you at receiving feedback?   Feedback is a crucial part of growth, but it can be really hard to hear! Our defenses go up and we feel like we're being criticized and attacked. So what can we do to be more open to feedback and able to take it on board without going into a failure spiral?   Julie Campbell is here to show us the way. In this episode of the Leading Lady podcast, Julie talks about why feedback matters, how to change your reaction to feedback, and how to give and receive good feedback.    Julie is the president and CEO of Severn Leadership Group, a company committed to making the world better through virtuous leadership.    Topics covered in this episode include: Ways to practice giving and receiving feedback The three Ps that are harming your chances at growth  How to take feedback even when you don't like how it was delivered    You are a lifelong learner and feedback will help you grow throughout your life. Tune in to change the way you receive feedback forever!    Show notes available at www.leadinglady-coaching.com/podcast   Resources Mentioned:  Learn More About the Severn Leadership Group: https://www.severnleadership.org/  Read The Virtue Proposition by SLG Founder Sig Berg: https://a.co/d/0hztO6bM  Read Bobby Powers' Article: The Complete Guide on How to Receive Feedback: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/complete-guide-how-receive-feedback-bobby-powers/  Read Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen: https://a.co/d/02WWYKuZ    Have you joined the Leading Ladies Facebook Group yet?! I would love to see you in there! Head to https://www.facebook.com/groups/LeadingLadiesAAL to join! Let's connect on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/aalcoaching Let's connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/leading.lady.coach/

Read the full transcript here. How easy is it to shift our baseline level of happiness? What sorts of things can most effectively shift that baseline? And are they highly specific to each individual or generalizable to most people? What are the differences between conceptual and phenomenal self-love? Why might it be useful to view shame as a kink? How does self-love or self-acceptance differ from indulging or even just tolerating the worst parts of yourself? What's the best way to think about "woo"? How genuine is the stereotypical guru demeanor of serenity, graciousness, and attentiveness? Is it possible for people with aphantasia to learn visualization? What's so interesting about perfume? What can people do to become better writers?Sasha Chapin is a writer currently living in California. Most of his recent writing is on his Substack. His most popular posts there are "What the humans like is responsiveness" and "50 Things I Know". He also wrote a book called All the Wrong Moves: A Memoir About Chess, Love, and Ruining Everything. Learn more about him at his website, sashachapin.com, or follow him on Twitter / X at @sashachapin.Further reading:Cate Hall's Clearer Thinking episodeLoch Kelly's Clearer Thinking episodeMind's Eye Development eCourse — the course that helped Sasha overcome aphantasiaLoving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, by Byron KatieExpanding Awareness, by Michael AshcroftDifficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen StaffSpencer Greenberg — Host / DirectorJosh Castle — ProducerRyan Kessler — Audio EngineerUri Bram — FactotumWeAmplify — TranscriptionistsMusicBroke for FreeJosh WoodwardLee RosevereQuiet Music for Tiny Robotswowamusiczapsplat.comAffiliatesClearer ThinkingGuidedTrackMind EasePositlyUpLift[Read more]

If you struggle with feedback, you're not alone. In this episode Patty shares some strategies from the book, Thanks for the Feedback by Sheila Heen and Douglas Stone. She also shares what she purchased this week (spoiler alert: all were wants- not needs!).The ADHD-Friendly Planner On-Demand Course PLUS Planner is available in the ADHD-Friendly shop for only $79.95: https://www.adhdfriendly.com/adhd-friendly-shop/Thank you for checking out this episode of the ADHD Friendly podcast with Patty Blinderman!!New episodes are posted every Wednesday! Subscribe to the channel here:https://www.youtube.com/@adhdfriendlyCheck out/Join the ADHD-Friendly membership here:https://www.adhdfriendly.com/adhd-friendly-all-access-membership-includes/Please subscribe to my YouTube channel, ADHD Friendly Podcast, or wherever you listen to podcasts. For more information on the ADHD-Friendly services offered by Patty, please visit her website: ADHDFriendly.com

I read this book and immediately got so excited that I recorded a podcast episode. It is so good. Learning about the different kinds of feedback might just revolutionize how you give feedback. Learning to receive feedback better is a skill that we can all improve - this book tells you why that is so important and how to do it without losing your mind. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/booksapplied/support

In this episode, William Green chats with Bryan Lawrence, a highly successful hedge fund manager who runs an investment firm called Oakcliff Capital. Bryan almost never gives interviews, so this is a rare opportunity to hear him speak in depth about the advantages of a concentrated value strategy, how he finds new investments, what 6 questions he asks when analyzing any stock, what he's learned from Buffett & Munger, & how to build a happy life. IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL LEARN: 00:00 - Intro 05:42 - What Bryan Lawrence learned from his hugely successful father. 16:30 - What Charlie Munger taught Bryan.  33:07 - How Shelby Cullom Davis turned $200,000 into $800 million. 39:14 - How Bryan has consciously built an investing edge. 43:25 - What he learned from meeting Warren Buffett. 47:15 - Why Bryan looks for three specific characteristics in any business. 59:18 - How to beat the market by making infrequent bets.  1:08:19 - Why he's obsessed with identifying where he's wrong. 1:10:17 - How he searches for new investment ideas. 1:14:32 - How he structures his day. 1:44:20 - How to think rationally about fossil fuels & climate change. 1:49:1 - How to build a happy life & great relationships. Disclaimer: Slight discrepancies in the timestamps may occur due to podcast platform differences. BOOKS AND RESOURCES Bryan Lawrence's investment firm, Oakcliff Capital. Check out Poor Charlie's Almanack. Dean Ornish & Anne Ornish's book Undo It. Robert Cialdini's book Influence. Alain de Boton's book The Consolations of Philosophy. Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, & Sheila Heen's book Difficult Conversations. John Rothchild's book The Davis Dynasty. Vaclav Smil's book How the World Really Works. David Mackay's book Sustainable Energy Without the Hot Air. Gillian Zoe Segal's book Getting There. William Green's podcast interview with Chris Davis | YouTube Video William Green's book, “Richer, Wiser, Happier” – read the reviews of this book. Follow William Green on X. Check out all the books mentioned and discussed in our podcast episodes here. Enjoy ad-free episodes when you subscribe to our Premium Feed. NEW TO THE SHOW? Follow our official social media accounts: X (Twitter) | LinkedIn | | Instagram | Facebook | TikTok. Browse through all our episodes (complete with transcripts) here. Try our tool for picking stock winners and managing our portfolios: TIP Finance Tool. Enjoy exclusive perks from our favorite Apps and Services. Stay up-to-date on financial markets and investing strategies through our daily newsletter, We Study Markets. Learn how to better start, manage, and grow your business with the best business podcasts.  SPONSORS Support our free podcast by supporting our sponsors: River Toyota Meyka AT&T Vacasa Fidelity Monarch Money Yahoo! Finance Long Angle Public USPS American Express Shopify HELP US OUT! Help us reach new listeners by leaving us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts! It takes less than 30 seconds, and really helps our show grow, which allows us to bring on even better guests for you all! Thank you – we really appreciate it! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://theinvestorspodcastnetwork.supportingcast.fm

Here is Craig's opening paragraph framework: Although this unscripted podcast began as a discussion of difficult conversations, it soon veered into how to engage in conversations about racism and war. We soon realized that the tools needed to engage fully may differ when conversations occur with friends, within a family, a community, a library board, a university, or a national dialogue. We acknowledge that the tragedy of slavery in this nation and the ongoing debates on how to resolve the legacy of slavery and Jim Crow have caused substantial harm to individuals and communities. We offer this podcast as an initial effort to broaden the conversation. One podcast's ideas for one type of dialogue, however, can never address all issues. We will offer subsequent podcasts to seek multiple opinions and ideas of how to seek the common good and a more perfect union. Resources for Ongoing Dialogue: Rhonda MaGee, The Inner Work of Racial Justice, Healing Ourselves and Transforming our Communities Through Mindfulness, (Tarcherperigree, N.Y., 2019), 29. She writes, “This is a moment of racial discomfort. Such moments are common in a world shaped by racism. I deserve kindness in the moment. And I offer kindness to others impacted by this movement as well.” Andrea Medea, Conflict Unraveled, Fixing Problems at Work and in Families, (Pivot Point Press, Chicago, Il, 2004), (citing Rev. Bevel at p.64). Kerry Patterson et. al., Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking when Stakes are High, Second Edition, (McGraw-Hill, 2002), (shared pool at p. 22). Agents of Change: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3325282/ We mistakenly identified one of the universities in the podcast. Agents of Change tracks the responses from San Francisco State and Cornell University. “Stumbling Upon a Signed Pulitzer Prize Winning Photo:” http://alleghenyarchivesmedia.com/blog/2019/1/3/stumbling-upon-a-signed-pulitzer-prize-photo Roger Fischer et al., Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In (3rd Edition) (Penguin Publishing Group, 2011). Douglas Stone et. al., Difficult Conversations, How to Discuss What Matters Most, (Penguin Books, N.Y., 2000)

256: Managing Conflict as a Nonprofit Leader (Carol Bowser)SUMMARYAre unresolved conflicts within your nonprofit causing chronic pain in your organization? In episode 256 of Your Path to Nonprofit Leadership, we explore the intricate world of conflict resolution with Carol Bowser, the Founder of Conflict Management Strategies, and an expert in managing workplace dynamics. From navigating power structures to fostering healthy interactions, Carol shares invaluable insights to help nonprofit leaders cultivate environments of open communication and collaboration. She emphasizes the significance of addressing conflicts promptly and offers practical strategies toward creating harmonious and productive workplaces. Learn the art of conflict resolution and discover how to transform challenges into opportunities for growth and cohesion within your nonprofit organization.ABOUT CAROLCarol Bowser, J.D. is a workplace conflict expert. After practicing Employment Law for several years, Carol founded Conflict Management Strategies when she realized a lawsuit can't deliver the level of resolution and satisfaction that is gained when people are actively involved in creating solutions to their workplace conflict. Carol's clients come with a wide range of employers because conflict is universal across all industries and types of organizations. Where there are people, there is conflict. The key is to help people recognize and address conflict before it damages working relationships and creates organizational drag. In her over 20 years of experience, she has discovered some universal themes about workplace conflict and loves to share how people at all levels can strengthen their conflict resolution muscles.EPISODE TOPICS & RESOURCESDifficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, et al.Learn more about Carol here.Ready for a Mastermind? Learn more here!Have you gotten Patton's book Your Path to Nonprofit Leadership: Seven Keys to Advancing Your Career in the Philanthropic SectorCheck out our new website, PMAnonprofit.com

Robert Talbert shares about the principles of grading for growth on episode 510 of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast. Quotes from the episode In one shot, she can't get a B in the class. And I sat there and just watched her sense of self worth and her excitement in the class just decay away right before my eyes. -Robert Talbert When you look at grades as we often use them in a traditional setting, they are much of what we do is under the guise of object what we think is objectivity. -Robert Talbert The biggest thing that's broken about grades is that traditional grading is completely disconnected from the notion of a feedback loop. -Robert Talbert Give helpful feedback that doesn't humiliate the student, affirms their basic dignity as a human being, and highlights what went well. Helpful feedback also highlights what could use some work and invites students to collaborate with you to make it better. -Robert Talbert Reattempts without penalty, that's the closing of the feedback loop. -Robert Talbert Points used for grades are a judgment call that results in a label. -Robert Talbert Resources Grading for Growth: A Guide to Alternative Grading Practices that Promote Authentic Learning and Student Engagement in Higher Education, by David Clark & Robert Talbert Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (Third Edition), Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict, by Donna Hicks Leading with Dignity: How to Create a Culture That Brings Out the Best in People, by Donna Hicks The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain, by Annie Murphy Paul Robert Talbert's Sabbatical in Industry with Steelcase The 12-week plan for building courses, by Robert Talbert

AppSec specialist Megan Jacquot joins Chris and Robert for a compelling conversation about community, career paths, and productive red team exercises. Megan shares her unique cybersecurity origin story, tracing her interest in the field from childhood influences through her tenure as an educator and her formal return to academia to pivot into a tech-focused career. She delves into her roles in threat intelligence and application security, emphasizing her passion for technical work, penetration testing, and bug bounty programs. Additionally, Megan highlights the importance of mentorship, her involvement with the Women in Cybersecurity (WeCyS) community, and her dedication to fostering the next generation of cybersecurity professionals. The discussion covers assumed breach and red team engagements in cybersecurity, the significance of empathy in bug bounty interactions, tips for Call for Papers (CFP) submissions, and the value of community engagement within organizations like OWASP and DEF CON. Megan concludes with insights on the importance of difficult conversations and giving back to the cybersecurity community.LinksDifficult Conversations (How to Discuss What Matters Most) by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen -- https://www.stoneandheen.com/difficult-conversationsBeing Henry: The Fonz...and Beyond by Henry Winkler -- https://celadonbooks.com/book/being-henry-fonz-and-beyond-henry-winkler/FOLLOW OUR SOCIAL MEDIA: ➜Twitter: @AppSecPodcast➜LinkedIn: The Application Security Podcast➜YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ApplicationSecurityPodcast Thanks for Listening! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

706: Leading Beyond the Chair: 4 Key Pillars for Dental Team Success – Miranda BeesonIf you're not good with people, you won't have a great business — or a great life! Your first step is to master the four domains of emotional intelligence, and Kirk Behrendt brings back Miranda Beeson, one of ACT's amazing coaches, to teach you how. Get good at people, not just dentistry! To become an emotionally intelligent leader for yourself, your team, and your family, listen to Episode 706 of The Best Practices Show!Learn More About Miranda:Send Miranda an email: miranda@actdental.com Follow Miranda on ACT's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/actdentalSend Gina an email: gina@actdental.com More Helpful Links for a Better Practice & a Better Life:Subscribe to The Best Practices Show: https://the-best-practices-show.captivate.fm/listenJoin The Best Practices Association: https://www.actdental.com/bpaJoin ACT's To The Top Study Club: https://www.actdental.com/tttSee the ACT Dental/BPA Live Event Schedule: https://www.actdental.com/eventGet The Best Practices Magazine for free: https://www.actdental.com/magazinePlease leave us a review on the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-best-practices-show-with-kirk-behrendt/id1223838218Episode Resources:Read Hidden Potential by Adam Grant: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/719611/hidden-potential-by-adam-grantTake the DiSC assessment: https://www.thediscpersonalitytest.comTake the Kolbe A Index: https://www.kolbe.comTake the Working Genius assessment: https://www.workinggenius.com/about/assessmentTake the Myers-Briggs assessment: https://www.themyersbriggs.com/en-USRead Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/313485/thanks-for-the-feedback-by-douglas-stone-and-sheila-heenRead The Outward Mindset by The Arbinger Institute: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/575042/the-outward-mindset-by-the-arbinger-instituteMain...

Nearly every kind of feedback — whether you agree with it or not — can be used to help you grow. Sheila Heen knows this well. As the founder of Triad Consulting Group, professor of practice at Harvard Law School, and the co-author of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well and Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, Sheila has spent nearly 30 years helping executive teams across the world work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together. In this episode of The Game Changing Attorney Podcast, Sheila and Michael Mogill discuss: The underlying structure and challenge of every difficult conversation The different types of feedback leaders can give — and what actually works How to raise tough issues and have productive conversations ---- Show Notes: 07:34 – The single most valuable skill you can have 14:57 – Defining difficult conversations 17:58 – How to navigate a tough talk 20:57 – Not everything is either/or 23:22 – Starting difficult conversations with a third story 29:35 – The 3 types of feedback 34:24 – Navigating sensitivity 38:44 – Front seat leader, back seat feedback 42:10 – What being a game changer means to Sheila Heen ---- Links & Resources Triad Consulting Group Harvard Law School Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Occidental College The Harvard Negotiation Project Bruce Patton Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck Getting It Done by Roger Fisher. John Richardson, and Alan Sharp Tesla The Game Changing Attorney by Michael Mogill ---- Listening to this episode but want to watch it? Check it out on Spotify.  Do you love this podcast and want to see more game changing content? Subscribe to our YouTube channel. ---- Past guests on The Game Changing Attorney Podcast include David Goggins, John Morgan, Alex Hormozi, Randi McGinn, Kim Scott, Chris Voss, Kevin O'Leary, Laura Wasser, John Maxwell, Mark Lanier, Robert Greene, and many more. ---- If you enjoyed this episode, you may also like: #162 Kim Scott – Radical Candor: How to Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity #166 John Maxwell #217 AMMA  – The Key to Clarity in Business

Many of us have had the boss from hell at some point--that person calling the shots who was absolutely horrible to work for. And while many in this situation just quit, walking away from the job isn't your only course of action. You can practice the art of managing up instead.As the author of Managing Up, Mary Abbajay literally wrote the book on it. So, if you want to move up, win at work, and succeed with any type of boss, then listen in as she talks about what it means to manage up and how it impacts your relationships.In this episode of the Branding Room Only podcast, you'll learn how to manage up within a simple framework as you build your brand. Mary will also teach you how to give constructive feedback and overcome three things that might trigger you when receiving feedback.1:39 - What personal brand means to Mary, three words that describe her, her favorite quote, and the hype song that plays every time she steps on stage5:10 - Mary's journey to discover what she wanted to do and how she defined and built her personal brand11:08 - How luck links to success and how it helped Mary become a LinkedIn Learning Instructor and an author16:32 - What managing up means and how doing it impacts your personal brand22:43 - The simple framework for managing up and how it helps you build better professional and personal relationships26:52 - The art of receiving feedback, its effect on your brand, and how to deal with the three feedback triggers31:17 - How to give potentially challenging feedback in a constructive way and how it impacts your brand39:47 - A brand aspect that Mary will always stand by, her Branding Room Only magic, and a fun sidebar on bartendingMentioned In How to Practice the Art of Managing Up and Navigating Feedback with Mary AbbajayManaging Up: How to Move Up, Win at Work, and Succeed with Any Type of Boss by Mary AbbajayMary Abbajay on LinkedInThe Careerstone Group | InstagramCubicle Confidential podcast: Apple | Amazon | iHeart | Spotify“2024 Intention and Goal Setting Webinar” | YouTubeIs Your Women's Group Winning?: Strategies For Building A Stronger Women's Initiative In Your Organization“Some People Are Just Lucky. You Can Make Yourself One of Them.” by Rachel Feintzeig | Wall Street Journal (subscription required)Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen This episode is brought to you by PGE Consulting Group LLC.To learn more about Paula and her services, go to www.paulaedgar.com or contact her at info@paulaedgar.com, and follow Paula Edgar and the PGE Consulting Group LLC on LinkedIn.

Hello and welcome to Season 13! This season is different because ½ of the 8 episodes are going to be focused on AI. However, there are a few episodes that aren't focused on AI including today's. While understanding AI is important, we also need the EQ that occurs in between skilling up and one of those huge skills is navigating difficult conversations. As Jennifer says, contact and context before content! This episode is the pep talk you perhaps didn't even know you needed. Jennifer empowers us to tackle our challenges head on, eliminate negative self talk,  and take care of ourselves throughout the process. We go through three real life examples and Jennifer talks through how she would handle them. These examples were submitted by real life listeners with their real life challenges. Jennifer Zaslow is an Executive Coach who believes that harnessing your full potential begins with finding your voice. She began her professional life in New York as an aspiring opera singer, an experience that led to a twenty year career as a leader and senior fundraiser in the non-profit sector.  Today, as Partner at Clear Path Executive Coaching, Jennifer's signature mix of intuition, directness and humor enables her to work successfully with clients ranging from CEO's to young leaders, helping individuals to reach their full potential, and organizations to achieve their strategic goals.   Jennifer has worked with leaders and teams from a wide variety of sectors, including higher ed (Harvard, Yale, Columbia, Cornell, University of Pennsylvania), arts and culture (The Metropolitan Museum of Art, The New York Public Library, The Metropolitan Opera, New York City Ballet, BAM, The High Line), sports/media/entertainment (The NFL, Sundance Institute, BuzzFeed, WNYC, KCRW) and tech/startups (Google, CHIEF, Angi, and TodayTix).   Prior to coaching, Jennifer held the chief development officer role at three New York City cultural institutions: Manhattan Theatre Club, New York City Opera, and The New York Public Library.  There, she successfully completed a $500 million capital campaign during the 2008 recession and grew the Library's endowment to over $1 billion.    Jennifer holds a B.A. cum laude from Wesleyan University and a CPCC coaching certification from CTI. She is certified in the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, is a Gallup Clifton Strengths Coach and is a recipient of Harvard Law School's PON certificate in Mediation and Conflict Resolution. She is also Director of the Floria Lasky Institute for Arts Leadership, sponsored by The Jerome Robbins Foundation.  She lives and practices in New York City. Resources: 1. Getting to Yes by Roger Fisher and William Ury 2. Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen 3. Crucial Conversations by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, Emily Gregory 4. How to Work with Anyone (even difficult people) by Amy Gallo --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/devdebrief/support

Today's episode is all about making career changes! If you're stuck in a career rut or unhappy at work, here are some signs that it might be time to quit your job, how to mitigate the risks and some encouraging words from listeners who have successfully made leap to a new industry. Glen is joined by John from this is property and Shell from this is work.Check out John's book tour dates & links to buy the book at sortyourpropertyout.comCheck out Shell & Glen's book,

In today's Q&A, Glen and financial adviser at Rising Tide, Rebecca Pritchard unpack your questions about:

#173: Ryan Gonsalves is a former professional footballer and founder of 2ndwind Academy, a platform empowering former elite athletes in their transition to fulfilling careers.  He explains the transferable skills professional athletes have, the challenges athletes face when their career ends and how to make the most of new opportunities.What you'll learn[1:34] Why Ryan wanted to coach elite athletes. [2:16] The unique challenges elite athletes face when they stop competing in their sport. [3:10] The way your career is linked with your identity. [4:10] The limited lifespan of being a professional athlete. [6:38] The players Ryan Gonsalves played with at Leeds United. [7:47] How Ryan became a professional footballer. [9:26] Why Ryan wanted to play football professionally. [12:47] The goals Ryan had for his footballing career. [14:38] What Ryan's career as a professional footballer looked like. [17:06] What it means to be a semi-professional footballer. [18:08] How Ryan's mother influenced his decision to stop playing professional football. [19:45] The amount you can learn from life regrets. [23:47] The continuous pressure professional footballers are under. [27:09] How Ryan transitioned to a more conventional life and career. [31:20] The amount of luck involved with being successful. [32:36] How to get more luck in your life. [35:23] How Ryan got a job working with HSBC in Hong Kong. [37:25] The importance of being optimistic about new opportunities. [38:52] Why Ryan transitioned from banking to career coach. [41:00]  How what you value in life can change over time. [42:38] How Ryan started the 2nd Wind Academy. [43:13] The ways Ryan wants 2nd Wind to grow and expand.  [44:24] The essential nature of human-played sports as entertainment. [45:52] The transferable communication skills you learn as a sportsman. [47:25] The value of feedback in the workplace.Resources mentioned in this episodePlease note that some of these are affiliate links and we may get a commission in the event that you make a purchase.  This helps us to cover our expenses and is at no additional cost to you.Thanks for the Feedback, Douglas Stone and Sheila HeenFor the show notes for this episode, including a full transcript and links to all the resources mentioned, visit:https://changeworklife.com/from-professional-footballer-to-athlete-career-coach/Re-assessing your career?  Know you need a change but don't really know where to start?  Check out these two exercises to start the journey of working out what career is right for you!Take me to the exercises!Follow us on  Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

Wanna know the habits that will fast track your way to an early retirement and the life you want to live? Strap in! Glen and John give the inside scoop.Check out John's book tour dates & links to buy the book at sortyourpropertyout.comBook club

In today's episode Glen and John chat about all things wills and estate planning with Erin Henry from Devise Legal. Long time listeners will remember Erin from the OG podcast days! They cover:

Welcome to another episode ✨ and a new name! ✨ Glen and John discuss the stage 3 tax cuts plus your questions around:

As humans, we tend to avoid conversations that can cause us to feel anxious or frustrated. But today's authors make the case for leaning into these difficult conversations and give us advice for doing so with confidence and skill. Talking to the Internet podcast Bookworm #101: Never Split the Difference Mike's Obsidian University Cohort Difficult […]

Tue, 02 Jan 2024 20:30:00 GMT http://relay.fm/focused/194 http://relay.fm/focused/194 I'd Like to Take a Mulligan 194 David Sparks and Mike Schmitz David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. clean 3868 David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. This episode of Focused is sponsored by: Vitally: A new era for customer success productivity. Get a free pair of AirPods Pro when you book a qualified meeting. Nom Nom: Healthy, fresh food for dogs formulated by top Board Certified Veterinary Nutritionists. Prepped in our kitchens with free delivery to your door. Get 50% off. Links and Show Notes: Deep Focus: Extended ad-free episodes with bonus deep dive content. Focused #193: The Problem with Mise en Place, with Justin Khanna The Theme System MIke's Obsidian Quotebook video Mike's Obsidian University Starter Vault Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Feel-Good Productivity by Ali Abdaal Proust and the Squid: The Story and Science of the Reading Brain by Maryanne Wolf Reader, Come Home: The Reading Brain in a Digital World by Maryanne Wolf Traveler's Notebook Drop + bi

Tue, 02 Jan 2024 20:30:00 GMT http://relay.fm/focused/194 http://relay.fm/focused/194 David Sparks and Mike Schmitz David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. clean 3868 David & Mike reflect on everything that happened in 2023 and share their intentions for 2024. This episode of Focused is sponsored by: Vitally: A new era for customer success productivity. Get a free pair of AirPods Pro when you book a qualified meeting. Nom Nom: Healthy, fresh food for dogs formulated by top Board Certified Veterinary Nutritionists. Prepped in our kitchens with free delivery to your door. Get 50% off. Links and Show Notes: Deep Focus: Extended ad-free episodes with bonus deep dive content. Focused #193: The Problem with Mise en Place, with Justin Khanna The Theme System MIke's Obsidian Quotebook video Mike's Obsidian University Starter Vault Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Feel-Good Productivity by Ali Abdaal Proust and the Squid: The Story and Science of the Reading Brain by Maryanne Wolf Reader, Come Home: The Reading Brain in a Digital World by Maryanne Wolf Traveler's Notebook D

We are CONSTANTLY having (or avoiding) difficult conversations. This book will tell you how to do it well. Special guest Marsha Shandur and I talk through highlights of the book and have some laughs discussing having (and also avoiding) Difficult Conversations. Marsha made this secret webpage with more resources based on this podcast episode! She is such a pro. Check it out: https://www.yesyesmarsha.com/booksapplied/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/booksapplied/support

Mallory Seisser is the owner of The Gilded Lily salon in Chicago's Logan Square neighborhood. She also teaches other salon owners nationwide how to better run their businesses as a professor at PIP University. In this past year, she's made the transition from behind the chair as a stylist to running her salon and teaching full-time. In this episode, we talk about the bold moves she's made in her career to step up in her leadership and grow her impact – and how those moves haven't always been easy, but they've always been worth it. We also discuss how Mallory is navigating making the shift from being a fixer and helper to empowering her people, as she takes on new roles in her career.Resources:Check out Mallory's salon at gildedlilychicago.comFollow Mallory on Instagram: @professor.malRead Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila HeenDisrupt HR Talk: “Stop Taking Work Personally”Connect with me:InstagramLinkedInYouTubeselfatwork.comProduced by NOVA Media

Setting new years resolutions can feel overwhelming and unsustainable so here are some simple ways to create more overall joy and contentment in your life. If you want to see these in blog format, read them all here! We touch on:

Sheila Heen: Difficult Conversations Sheila Heen is the Thaddeus R. Beal Professor of Practice at Harvard Law School, a Deputy Director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, and a founder of Triad Consulting Group. She often works with executive teams to engage conflict productively, repair working relationships, and implement change in complex organizations. She has published articles in The New York Times and the Harvard Business Review and appeared on Oprah, CNBC's Power Lunch, and NPR. She is coauthor along with Douglas Stone of The New York Times bestseller Thanks for the Feedback and also now, in it's third edition, co-author with Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton of the iconic bestseller, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most*. When our intentions are good, it's hard to appreciate how we could have had such negative impact on someone else. It's equally challenging to navigate a tough conversation when someone else's words or actions have wronged us, even if that's not what they intended. In this conversation, Sheila and I discuss how to shift just a bit to help our difficult conversations go better. Key Points Intent does not equal impact. It's a mistake to assume that we know the other party's intentions. It's a mistake to assume that good intentions erase bad impact. Prevent the first mistake by attempting to separate intent from impact. Use these three questions: Actions: What did the other person actually say or do? Impact: What was the impact of this on me? Assumption: Based on this impact, what assumption am I making about what the other person intended? To present the second mistake, listen first for feelings before sharing intent. It's helpful also to reflect on your own intent, which may not always be as pure as initially recognized. Resources Mentioned Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most* by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Get Way Better at Accepting Feedback, with Sheila Heen (episode 143) How to Begin Difficult Conversations About Race, with Kwame Christian (episode 594) How to Deal With Passive-Aggressive People, Amy Gallo (episode 595) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

Brought to you by Nordic Naturals Ultimate Omega fish oil, Helix Sleep premium mattresses, and ShipStation shipping software. Sheila Heen has spent the last three decades working to understand how people can better navigate conflict, with a particular specialty in difficult conversations. She is a founder of Triad Consulting Group, a professor at Harvard Law School, and a co-author of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (even when it's off base, unfair, poorly delivered, and, frankly, you're not in the mood), with Douglas Stone, and Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, with Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton (with a newly updated third edition that was released in August).Sheila and her colleagues at Triad work with leaders and organizations to build their capacity to have the conversations that matter most. Her clients have included Pixar, American Express, the NBA, the Singapore Supreme Court, the Obama White House, and theologians struggling with the nature of truth and God.She is schooled in negotiation daily by her three children. You can find my first conversation with Sheila at tim.blog/SheilaHeen.Please enjoy!This episode is brought to you by Nordic Naturals, the #1-selling fish-oil brand in the US! More than 80% of Americans don't get enough omega-3 fats from their diet. That is a problem because the body can't produce omega-3s, an important nutrient for cell structure and function. Nordic Naturals solves that problem with their doctor-recommended Ultimate Omega fish-oil formula for heart health, brain function, immune support, and more. Ultimate Omega is made exclusively from 100% wild-caught sardines and anchovies. It's incredibly pure and fresh with no fishy aftertaste. All Nordic Naturals' fish-oil products are offered in the triglyceride molecular form—the form naturally found in fish, and the form your body most easily absorbs. Go to Nordic.com and discover why Nordic Naturals is the #1-selling omega-3 brand in the U.S. Use promo code TIM for 20% off your order. *This episode is also brought to you by ShipStation. Do you sell stuff online? Then you know what a pain the shipping process is. ShipStation was created to make your life easier. Whether you're selling on eBay, Amazon, Shopify, or over 100 other popular selling channels, ShipStation lets you access all of your orders from one simple dashboard, and it works with all of the major shipping carriers, locally and globally, including FedEx, UPS, and USPS. Join the 130,000+ companies that have grown their ecommerce businesses with ShipStation. Tim Ferriss Show listeners get to try ShipStation free for 60 days! Just visit ShipStation.com/Tim!*This episode is also brought to you by Helix Sleep! Helix was selected as the best overall mattress of 2022 by GQ magazine, Wired, and Apartment Therapy. With Helix, there's a specific mattress to meet each and every body's unique comfort needs. Just take their quiz—only two minutes to complete—that matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect mattress for you. They have a 10-year warranty, and you get to try it out for a hundred nights, risk-free. They'll even pick it up from you if you don't love it. And now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders plus two free pillows at HelixSleep.com/Tim.*For show notes and past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast.For deals from sponsors of The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast-sponsorsSign up for Tim's email newsletter (5-Bullet Friday) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim's books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissYouTube: youtube.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Margaret Atwood, Mark Zuckerberg, Peter Thiel, Dr. Gabor Maté, Anne Lamott, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Mel and Michelle discuss books and podcasts they've read and listened to and highlight their impact on workplace culture and leadership. Book referenced in this episode:Thrive by Design by Don Rim.Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Hien.Beyond Leaning In by Melanie Home.Reclaiming Conversation by Sherry Turkle Lead to Soar is a global online network for businesswomen, a podcast, and we host live-streaming and in person events to help women have a career that soars! The podcast is hosted by Mel Butcher (melbutcher.com) and Michelle Redfern (michelleredfern.com) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melvyn Bragg and guests discuss the man who, in 1905, produced several papers that were to change the world of physics and whose name went on to become a byword for genius. This was Albert Einstein, then still a technical expert at a Swiss patent office, and that year of 1905 became known as his annus mirabilis ('miraculous year'). While Einstein came from outside the academic world, some such as Max Planck championed his theory of special relativity, his principle of mass-energy equivalence that followed, and his explanations of Brownian Motion and the photoelectric effect. Yet it was not until 1919, when a solar eclipse proved his theory that gravity would bend light, that Einstein became an international celebrity and developed into an almost mythical figure. With Richard Staley Professor in History and Philosophy of Science at the University of Cambridge and Professor in History of Science at the University of Copenhagen Diana Kormos Buchwald Robert M. Abbey Professor of History and Director and General Editor of The Einstein Papers Project at the California Institute of Technology And John Heilbron Professor Emeritus at the University of California, Berkeley Producer: Simon Tillotson Reading list: Ronald W. Clark, Einstein: The Life and Times (first published 1971; HarperPaperbacks, 2011) Albert Einstein (eds. Jurgen Renn and Hanoch Gutfreund), Relativity: The Special and the General Theory - 100th Anniversary Edition (Princeton University Press, 2019) Albert Einstein, Out of My Later Years (first published 1950; Citadel Press, 1974) Albert Einstein (ed. Paul A. Schilpp), Albert Einstein: Philosopher-Scientist: The Library of Living Philosophers Volume VII (first published 1949; Open Court, 1970) Albert Einstein (eds. Otto Nathan and Heinz Norden), Einstein on Peace (first published 1981; Literary Licensing, 2011) Albrecht Folsing, Albert Einstein: A Biography (Viking, 1997) J. L. Heilbron, Niels Bohr: A Very Short Introduction (Oxford University Press, 2020) Walter Isaacson, Einstein: His Life and Universe (Simon & Schuster, 2008) Max Jammer, Einstein and Religion (Princeton University Press, 2002) Michel Janssen and Christoph Lehner (eds.), The Cambridge Companion to Einstein (Cambridge University Press, 2014) Dennis Overbye, Einstein in Love: A Scientific Romance (Viking, 2000) Abraham Pais, Subtle Is the Lord: The Science and the Life of Albert Einstein (Oxford University Press, 1982) David E. Rowe and Robert Schulmann (eds.), Einstein on Politics: His Private Thoughts and Public Stands on Nationalism, Zionism, War, Peace, and the Bomb (Princeton University Press, 2007) Matthew Stanley, Einstein's War: How Relativity Triumphed Amid the Vicious Nationalism of World War I (Dutton, 2019) Fritz Stern, Einstein's German World (Princeton University Press, 1999) A. Douglas Stone, Einstein and the Quantum: The Quest of the Valiant Swabian (Princeton University Press, 2013) Milena Wazeck (trans. Geoffrey S. Koby), Einstein's Opponents: The Public Controversy About the Theory of Relativity in the 1920s (Cambridge University Press, 2014)

Melvyn Bragg and guests discuss the man who, in 1905, produced several papers that were to change the world of physics and whose name went on to become a byword for genius. This was Albert Einstein, then still a technical expert at a Swiss patent office, and that year of 1905 became known as his annus mirabilis ('miraculous year'). While Einstein came from outside the academic world, some such as Max Planck championed his theory of special relativity, his principle of mass-energy equivalence that followed, and his explanations of Brownian Motion and the photoelectric effect. Yet it was not until 1919, when a solar eclipse proved his theory that gravity would bend light, that Einstein became an international celebrity and developed into an almost mythical figure. With Richard Staley Professor in History and Philosophy of Science at the University of Cambridge and Professor in History of Science at the University of Copenhagen Diana Kormos Buchwald Robert M. Abbey Professor of History and Director and General Editor of The Einstein Papers Project at the California Institute of Technology And John Heilbron Professor Emeritus at the University of California, Berkeley Producer: Simon Tillotson Reading list: Ronald W. Clark, Einstein: The Life and Times (first published 1971; HarperPaperbacks, 2011) Albert Einstein (eds. Jurgen Renn and Hanoch Gutfreund), Relativity: The Special and the General Theory - 100th Anniversary Edition (Princeton University Press, 2019) Albert Einstein, Out of My Later Years (first published 1950; Citadel Press, 1974) Albert Einstein (ed. Paul A. Schilpp), Albert Einstein: Philosopher-Scientist: The Library of Living Philosophers Volume VII (first published 1949; Open Court, 1970) Albert Einstein (eds. Otto Nathan and Heinz Norden), Einstein on Peace (first published 1981; Literary Licensing, 2011) Albrecht Folsing, Albert Einstein: A Biography (Viking, 1997) J. L. Heilbron, Niels Bohr: A Very Short Introduction (Oxford University Press, 2020) Walter Isaacson, Einstein: His Life and Universe (Simon & Schuster, 2008) Max Jammer, Einstein and Religion (Princeton University Press, 2002) Michel Janssen and Christoph Lehner (eds.), The Cambridge Companion to Einstein (Cambridge University Press, 2014) Dennis Overbye, Einstein in Love: A Scientific Romance (Viking, 2000) Abraham Pais, Subtle Is the Lord: The Science and the Life of Albert Einstein (Oxford University Press, 1982) David E. Rowe and Robert Schulmann (eds.), Einstein on Politics: His Private Thoughts and Public Stands on Nationalism, Zionism, War, Peace, and the Bomb (Princeton University Press, 2007) Matthew Stanley, Einstein's War: How Relativity Triumphed Amid the Vicious Nationalism of World War I (Dutton, 2019) Fritz Stern, Einstein's German World (Princeton University Press, 1999) A. Douglas Stone, Einstein and the Quantum: The Quest of the Valiant Swabian (Princeton University Press, 2013) Milena Wazeck (trans. Geoffrey S. Koby), Einstein's Opponents: The Public Controversy About the Theory of Relativity in the 1920s (Cambridge University Press, 2014)

Chapter 1 What's Difficult ConversationsDifficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most is a book written by Douglas Stone, along with Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen. It was first published in 1999 and is a guide to handling challenging conversations in both personal and professional situations. The book offers practical advice and strategies to navigate conversations about disagreements, criticism, and emotions. It emphasizes the importance of open communication, listening skills, and understanding various perspectives. Difficult Conversations has gained popularity for its insights on resolving conflicts and improving relationships through effective communication.Chapter 2 Why is Difficult Conversations Worth ReadDifficult Conversations by Douglas Stone is worth reading because it offers practical and valuable insights into how to navigate and address challenging conversations effectively. Here are some reasons why the book is worth reading:1. Provides a framework: The book presents a clear framework for understanding and managing difficult conversations. It breaks down the elements of a conversation, outlines common pitfalls, and provides strategies for successful communication. By using this framework, readers can approach difficult conversations with more confidence.2. Offers practical advice: Difficult Conversations offers practical advice and tools that readers can apply in their personal and professional lives. It provides step-by-step guidance on how to prepare for and engage in difficult conversations, including techniques for active listening, reframing perspectives, and finding common ground.3. Explores common challenges: The book dives into the common challenges people face when having difficult conversations, such as managing emotions, dealing with differing opinions, and addressing underlying issues. By exploring these challenges, readers gain a deeper understanding of the dynamics at play and learn how to navigate them effectively.4. Real-life examples: Difficult Conversations includes numerous real-life examples, making the concepts and strategies more relatable and applicable. The book presents various types of difficult conversations, ranging from conflicts in personal relationships to workplace disputes, providing readers with a range of scenarios to learn from.5. Emphasizes empathy and understanding: One of the key themes in the book is the importance of empathy and understanding in difficult conversations. It highlights the significance of acknowledging and validating emotions, while also recognizing differing perspectives. By embracing empathy, readers can foster more constructive and compassionate conversations.6. Improves relationships and outcomes: The strategies outlined in Difficult Conversations can help readers build stronger relationships and achieve better outcomes in challenging situations. The book focuses on moving beyond blame and finding mutual understanding, enabling readers to create more positive and productive conversations.Overall, Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone is worth reading because it equips readers with practical tools, insights, and strategies that can be applied in various contexts. It helps individuals navigate difficult conversations more effectively, leading to improved relationships and outcomes.Chapter 3 Difficult Conversations Summary"Dfficult Conversations" by Douglas Stone, Sheila Heen, and Bruce Patton is a book that explores the challenges individuals face when engaging in difficult conversations, both personally and professionally. The authors provide a framework and strategies to navigate these conversations effectively.The book focuses on the idea that difficult conversations are...

Marc Lesser shows how to navigate difficult emotions and conversations to build thriving relationships. — YOU'LL LEARN — 1) Why we shouldn't be afraid of conflict. 2) The one question you need to ask when dealing with difficult people. 3) How to assess any relationship in 4 words. Subscribe or visit AwesomeAtYourJob.com/ep887 for clickable versions of the links below. — ABOUT MARC — Marc Lesser is a speaker, facilitator, workshop leader, and executive coach. He is the author of four books, including Seven Practices of a Mindful Leader: Lessons from Google and a Zen Monastery Kitchen, and CEO of ZBA Associates, an executive development and leadership consulting company. Lesser helped develop the world-renowned Search Inside Yourself (SIY) program within Google and was director of Tassajara Zen Mountain Center, the oldest Zen monastery in the Western world. He lives in Marin County, California, and leads Mill Valley Zen, a weekly meditation group. • Book: Finding Clarity: How Compassionate Accountability Builds Vibrant Relationships, Thriving Workplaces, and Meaningful Lives • Website: MarcLesser.net — RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE SHOW — • Book: Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

As managers, we're often thrown into the role, expected to just figure things out as we go along. This makes things way harder than they need to be, and often means our team members are at the brunt of our learning curve. But it doesn't have to be this way! In episode 64 of Managing Made Simple, I'm joined by Jack Kelly, Senior Contributor for Forbes in the workplace and career space and CEO of Compliance Search Group & WeCruitr, where we talk about how to set team members up for success as new managers, the importance of self-awareness as a manager, and how to keep the enthusiasm of new hires long after they join the team. About Jack:Jack Kelly is a Senior Contributor for Forbes, specializing in careers and leadership. He is the CEO of an executive search firm, the Compliance Search Group, and the startup WeCruitr. He is the host of the Blind Ambition podcast. Learn more about Jack at: coachero.ai References mentioned in this episode: Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen -- Ready for a one-stop-shop for everything you need to be a better manager? From live Q&As and Ask Me Anythings to recommendations of tools to exclusive resources, the Managing Made Simple Hub is the last place you'll ever need to look. Sign up today at: liagarvin.com/hub Looking for support for your team? Reach out to hello@liagarvin.com to learn more about one of my four core focuses for teams:For Entrepreneurs & Founders - Let's get you out of the weeds and your teams firing on all cylinders, saving you time and money to reinvest in your business. Ask about the "Ops Playbook" to get started.For Corporate Managers & Teams - Want to build more effective managers, get better at giving & receiving feedback, solve RTO the right way, or support your team in navigating change and uncertainly? Ask about my "Manager & Team workshops". -- Connect with me!LinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/liagarvinInstagram: instagram.com/lia.garvinWeb: liagarvin.comMusic by Y8S: isaacy8s.com

Happy Day, Friend! In this podcast episode I'm talking about perspective-taking and difficult conversations, and how mindfulness practices can create and empower greater perspective shifts. I share the “3 Conversations Framework” from the book, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen, and give ten (10) ways mindfulness practices help you implement this framework with more fidelity and greater success in all your conversations. I hope you gain tons of value from the episode. If so, please share with your people. I'd love to connect with you on social media

In difficult conversations, do you notice you or your conversant trying to "win" the discussion instead of listening to each other's perspectives? Today on Retire Sooner, Wes Moss is joined by Douglas Stone, author, speaker, and lecturer on negotiation at Harvard Law School, to talk about navigating difficult conversations. Whether the subject of the conversation is financial, medical, or an interpersonal conflict, there are some discussions that can feel awkward, tense, or become argumentative. Stone explores some ways that can be effective to start such conversations, engage empathy around the emotions and identities tied into them, and reach a mutually understood outcome. Wes also brings up blind spots we can all have in the way we talk to others and what we can do about them. They also explain productive ways to receive feedback and wrap up the episode with how liberating it can be to accept your own limitations with other people. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After more than 30 years in career services and recruiting, Jamie Belinne finds herself with a wealth of knowledge on how the different generations work, a book helping managers navigate those differences, and many awards and accolades acknowledging her expertise. We discuss how to mentor students and young professionals, why Gen Z is not a generation of narcissists, and why diversity isn't the norm but will be someday, thanks to the younger generations. Episode Highlights: According to Jamie, a student's experiences outside of the classroom are hugely important. Her time spent as a student worker and intern and her first few jobs were incredible learning opportunities for her. She encourages the students she mentors to strive to leave university with more than just a piece of paper asserting they've met the academic requirements of their degree. According to Jamie, a mentor is someone who has understanding and background knowledge beyond your own (in some area) to help provide insight and perspective on your goals and questions. She shares three keys to successful mentorship.In 2017, Jamie published "The Care and Feeding of Your Younger Employee: A Manager's Guide to Millennials and Gen Z." Her research revealed that perceived generational differences often stem from youthful mentality. She also discovered that young professionals anticipate diversity and an ideal work environment, but are often let down. Despite being labeled as narcissistic, younger generations raised in an online world exhibit high awareness of others and their influence.Episode Links:JamieWebsiteBookBooksCrucial Conversations by Kerry Patterson, Stephen R. Covey, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al SwitzlerDifficult Conversations by Douglas Stone,  Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen, and Roger FisherUniversitiesThe University of HoustonLouisiana State UniversityLoyola UniversityTexas TechBird Watching LocationsQuintana BeachHigh Island South Padre IslandFollow The Digital Marketing Mentor: Website and Blog: thedmmentor.com Instagram: @thedmmentor Linkedin: @thedmmentor YouTube: @thedmmentor Interested in Digital Marketing Services, Careers, or Courses? Check out more from the TDMM Family: Optidge.com - Full Service Digital Marketing Agency specializing in SEO, PPC, Paid Social, and Lead Generation efforts for established B2C and B2B businesses and organizations. ODEOacademy.com - Digital Marketing online education and course platform. ODEO gives you solid digital marketing knowledge to launch/boost your career or understand your business's digital marketing strategy.

Maricella Herrera Avila grew up in Mexico working in male-dominated fields. While she didn't immediately know that leadership was her path, she eventually found herself as CEO of Ellevate Network, the largest community for women at work focused on creating a culture of equity and inclusion in business.  In this episode, Maricella tells us about her path to becoming a CEO, starting with her previous career in banking. After she realized this field wasn't for her, she set out on a path of curiosity and discovery that led her to where she is today. Learn how she turned a love for puzzles and how things fit together into her current role as CEO. Maricella had to switch her definition of success from what she learned from her upbringing. Instead, she focuses on learning along the way and both giving and taking when she's networking. She's always asking questions and listening to what people have to say. We learned a lot from Maricella's journey and know you will too. Visit https://www.gobeyondbarriers.com where you will find show notes and links to all the resources in this episode, including the best way to get in touch with Maricella.   Highlights:  [02:31] Maricella's path to CEO [07:41] Gaining clarity about her definition of success [13:45] Dealing with criticism and having a support system [17:56] Overcoming limiting beliefs [22:57] Prioritizing to get things done and taking ownership at work [28:04] Asking for help and networking [31:48] Embracing curiosity [33:17] Continuing to learn and staying ahead of the game [37:48] Lighting round questions   Quotes: “If you can help one or two or a few people, that to me becomes success.” – Maricella Herrera Avila “If we could get people to understand their role and take ownership of that, then the whole work and prioritization becomes a little easier.” – Maricella Herrera Avila “A lot of what I've been doing lately is just listening.” – Maricella Herrera Avila   Lightning Round Questions: What book has greatly influenced you?  “The Little Prince” by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry and “Thanks for the Feedback” by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen What is your favorite inspiring quote or saying?  “Those who don't know their history are bound to repeat it.” What is one word or moniker you would use to describe yourself?  Authentic What is one change you've implanted that made your life better?  Becoming a runner. What power song would you want playing as you walk out onto a stage?  “Just a Girl” by No Doubt   About Maricella Herrera Avila: Maricella Herrera Avila is the CEO of Ellevate Network, the largest community for women+ at work focused on creating a culture of equity and inclusion in business. She oversees overall business operations, growth and strategy, and works closely with Ellevate's Chapter Leaders, Business Partners, and Champions to further Ellevate's impact. As a strategy executive with 15 years of experience building and scaling teams, brands and businesses, Maricella has led the creation of impactful programming such as the annual Mobilize Women Summit, which reaches thousands of professionals across the globe and is supported by some of the world's leading companies. Maricella is also the host of the Ellevate Podcast, Conversations with Women Changing the Face of Business. Through her 10-year career at Ellevate Network, she has managed the business through an acquisition, a re-brand, and a full operational/workforce transformation. Prior to Ellevate, Maricella held several positions in real estate banking at Banamex, Citi's Mexican subsidiary, where she worked on providing credit funding for low income housing development projects in the north of Mexico. Maricella received a BA in Financial Management from ITESM in Mexico and an MBA from Columbia Business School.   Links: Website: https://www.ellevatenetwork.com/ LinkedIn URL: https://www.linkedin.com/in/maricellaherreraa/  Twitter: https://twitter.com/mherreraavila  Podcast: https://www.ellevatenetwork.com/podcasts/