character in The Taming of the Shrew
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“I like them better in Shrew!” Allen Gilmore and Susannah Rogers compare notes on playing Kate and Petruchio in “The Taming of the Shrew” and “Shrew!” Plus, what the word obey really means in a relationship between equals, where Kate's inner volcano really comes from, finding agency as an artist, the importance of humor in a rehearsal room, and the not-so-blind date these two plan to go on after working on two productions together without ever meeting in person. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Book Vs. Movie: 10 Things I Hate About YouThe Taming of the Shrew & the 1999 Heath Ledger Film10 Things I Hate About You (1999) is a modern adaptation of William Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew, reimagining the story in a high school setting. In both works, the plot revolves around two sisters—one desirable and another perceived as problematic. In The Taming of the Shrew, the younger, more attractive Bianca cannot marry until her older, strong-willed sister, Katherina, finds a husband. Similarly, in 10 Things I Hate About You, Bianca Stratford can only date if her rebellious, sharp-tongued sister, Kat, does too. The character of Petruchio in Shakespeare's play, who is hired to "tame" Katherina and make her marriageable, is mirrored in Patrick Verona (Heath Ledger), who is paid to date Kat (Julia Stiles) so that Bianca can start dating.Despite the initial financial motivation, Petruchio and Patrick develop genuine feelings for their partners. While The Taming of the Shrew ends with Katherina seemingly submitting to societal expectations, 10 Things I Hate About You gives Kat more agency. She remains independent but opens up to love, showing a more modern and feminist take on Shakespeare's story. Between the play & the film--which did we prefer? Listen to find out! In this ep, the Margos discuss:The teen comedies of the late 1990s The work of Heath LedgerThe differences between the play and movieThe cast includes Julia Stiles (Kat), Heath Ledger (Patrick Verona), Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Cameron James), Larisa Oleynik (Bianca), Larry Miller (Walter Stratford), Andrew Keegan (Joey Donner), David Krumholtz (Michael Eckman), Daryl “Chill” Mitchell (Mr. Morgan), Susan May Pratt (Mandella), Alison Janey (Ms. Perky), David Leisure (Mr. Chapin), Gabriele Union (Chastity Church), Letters to Cleo, and Save Ferris. Clips Featured:“Hey there, Girlie!”10 Things I Hate About You (1999 trailer)“You see that girl?”“Rock bar scene”“Kat dances”“Can't Take My Eyes Off of You”“The poem scene”“Bianca beat down scene.”Music: Letters to Cleo; I Want You to Want Me Follow us on the socials!Join our Patreon page “Book Vs. Movie podcast”You can find us on Facebook at Book Vs. Movie Podcast GroupInstagram: Book Versus Movie @bookversusmoviebookversusmoviepodcast@gmail.com Margo D's Blog: Brooklynfitchick.comMargo D's Instagram “Brooklyn Fit Chick”Margo D's TikTok Margo D's YouTube: @MargoDonohueMargo P's Instagram: @shesnachomama Margo P's Blog: coloniabook.comMargo P's YouTube Channel: @shesnachomamaOur logo was designed by Madeleine Gainey/Studio 39 Marketing Follow on Instagram @Studio39Marketing & @musicalmadeleine
Lucentio and Bianca hurry to meet the priest Biondello bribed to perform the marriage. Gremio greets Petruchio, Katherine, Grumio and the real Vincentio at Lucentio's house, where they are met by the Merchant, who insists that he's Lucentio's father. Vincentio challenges him and chaos ensues as Tranio tries desperately to keep up the ruse. The newlyweds finally arrive and seeing no way out, they confess their gambit and beg forgiveness from their fathers. Once all is sorted out, Katherine confronts her father and forces him to reckon with his poor treatment of her. Later, the three newlywed couples (Katherine and Petruchio, Lucentio and Bianca, and Hortension and “The Widow”) celebrate their unions. Bianca and Lucentio are already off to a rocky start as they squabble over how much she's allowed to eat. Hortensio realizes he may not live long as the widow's fourth husband. Only Petruchio and Katherine seem to be partners in marriage, and when put to the test, Katherine finds new words to describe the meaning of true love. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Book Vs. Movie: 10 Things I Hate About YouThe Taming of the Shrew & the 1999 Heath Ledger Film10 Things I Hate About You (1999) is a modern adaptation of William Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew, reimagining the story in a high school setting. In both works, the plot revolves around two sisters—one desirable and another perceived as problematic. In The Taming of the Shrew, the younger, more attractive Bianca cannot marry until her older, strong-willed sister, Katherina, finds a husband. Similarly, in 10 Things I Hate About You, Bianca Stratford can only date if her rebellious, sharp-tongued sister, Kat, does too. The character of Petruchio in Shakespeare's play, who is hired to "tame" Katherina and make her marriageable, is mirrored in Patrick Verona (Heath Ledger), who is paid to date Kat (Julia Stiles) so that Bianca can start dating.Despite the initial financial motivation, Petruchio and Patrick develop genuine feelings for their partners. While The Taming of the Shrew ends with Katherina seemingly submitting to societal expectations, 10 Things I Hate About You gives Kat more agency. She remains independent but opens up to love, showing a more modern and feminist take on Shakespeare's story. Between the play & the film--which did we prefer? Listen to find out! In this ep, the Margos discuss:The teen comedies of the late 1990s The work of Heath LedgerThe differences between the play and movieThe cast includes Julia Stiles (Kat), Heath Ledger (Patrick Verona), Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Cameron James), Larisa Oleynik (Bianca), Larry Miller (Walter Stratford), Andrew Keegan (Joey Donner), David Krumholtz (Michael Eckman), Daryl “Chill” Mitchell (Mr. Morgan), Susan May Pratt (Mandella), Alison Janey (Ms. Perky), David Leisure (Mr. Chapin), Gabriele Union (Chastity Church), Letters to Cleo, and Save Ferris. Clips Featured:“Hey there, Girlie!”10 Things I Hate About You (1999 trailer)“You see that girl?”“Rock bar scene”“Kat dances”“Can't Take My Eyes Off of You”“The poem scene”“Bianca beat down scene.”Music: Letters to Cleo; I Want You to Want Me Follow us on the socials!Join our Patreon page “Book Vs. Movie podcast”You can find us on Facebook at Book Vs. Movie Podcast GroupInstagram: Book Versus Movie @bookversusmoviebookversusmoviepodcast@gmail.com Margo D's Blog: Brooklynfitchick.comMargo D's Instagram “Brooklyn Fit Chick”Margo D's TikTok Margo D's YouTube: @MargoDonohueMargo P's Instagram: @shesnachomama Margo P's Blog: coloniabook.comMargo P's YouTube Channel: @shesnachomamaOur logo was designed by Madeleine Gainey/Studio 39 Marketing Follow on Instagram @Studio39Marketing & @musicalmadeleine
Seeing he has no chance against Lucentio (AKA “Cambio”), Hortensio drops his “Licio” disguise and swears off women. Biondello, meanwhile, has found an old merchant who will pretend to be Lucentio's father, Vincenzio, so that Lucentio can marry Bianca without getting his real father's permission. Meanwhile, Katherine wakes in the comfort of Petruchio's home and is further smitten as he describes the goings-on at his farm. Later, Baptista gets all rights to Vinzentio's property from the man he thinks is Lucentio's father but is really the old and very agreeable merchant. Hortensio goes to Petrucio's house and is greeted by Grumio. As they rush to attend Bianca's hasty marriage they're interrupted by the arrival of an old gentleman who's lost his way trying to find his son. It doesn't take long for everyone to realize the gentleman is none other than Vincenzio, Lucentio's real father. Incensed to learn that his son is being married without his consent, he joins Petruchio, Katherine, Grumio and Hortensio on their way to the wedding. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Katherine reluctantly goes to church to be married, only to learn through an elaborate pantomime performed by Grumio and Biondello that Petruchio is running late. Finally, a drunk priest arrives with Petruchio, who is dressed as a gondolier. They make a mockery of the wedding but a humiliated Katherine is nonetheless sent off with her new husband by her clueless father, who reminisces fondly about young love. The newlyweds eventually arrive at Petruchio's frigid home in the pouring rain, where he tells her that he lives selflessly in poverty with seven penitents who share his bed and follow elaborate rituals before eating. Katherine nearly goes mad with hunger as Petruchio demands that they follow every step of the ritual before dining on the food delivered by the kitchen mistress, Dorcas. At last, Katherine realizes it's all a joke and she devours her food with joy and laughter. Once sated, she tells Petruchio she's going upstairs to get ready to lose her virginity to him, but Petruchio tells her he has no intention of making love to her until she is well rested and truly wants to be with him. It only makes Katherine more attracted to him, but Petruchio insists that she get a good night's sleep as he privately confesses to feeling the rekindling of his long dormant passion. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Petruchio negotiates with Baptista for Katherine's hand until Licio emerges from his tutoring session bruised and battered. It only strengthens Petruchio's resolve to woo Katherine and when she arrives, the two engage in a spirited match of wits. Katherine reluctantly agrees to go with Petruchio when he tells her that her father has agreed to marry her off to him. Gremio and Tranio (as Lucentio) immediately try to out-do each other in their bid for Bianca's hand, with Baptista as auctioneer. Tranio wins the contest and is promised Bianca's hand in marriage provided his father (Vincentio the tomato king) comes to the wedding in person. Tranio privately conspires to find a look-alike to pretend to be Vincentio. Meanwhile, Hortensio (still pretending to be Licio the Banjo Tutor) tries to woo Bianca with his instrument until Lucentio (as Cambio the Latin Tutor) interrupts and sends him away. He confesses his love to Bianca, who secretly invites him to her chamber after lunch. Hortensio returns and tries again with Bianca, failing miserably. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Petruchio tells Hortensio he's come to Padua to find a partner to give him renewed life after grieving the loss of his first wife. Hortensio tells him about Baptista's daughter, Katherine, but warns him that she's quite the shrew. Petruchio realizes he knows her father and is not put off. Hortensio agrees to provide an introduction if, in exchange, Petruchio presents him to Signior Baptista as a tutor for the object of his affection: Bianca. As they agree to the deal, Grumio announces the arrival of two other rivals vying for Bianca: Gremio and Lucentio, now disguised as Cambio. Hortensio introduces them to Petruchio and tells them of his intentions with Katherine, who once coupled will make Bianca available for marriage. Meanwhile, Katherine laments her isolation in her chamber at Baptista's house. She impulsively frees her sister's canaries from their cage to find the freedom she craves. When Bianca enters and sees what Katherine's done, the two fight savagely until Signor Baptista arrives to break it up. He sends Bianca away and scolds Katherine, lamenting his struggles as a single father until he hears the arrival of Gremio, Grumio, Tranio (as Lucentio), Lucentio (as Cambio), Hortensio (as Licio) and Petruchio. Petruchio tells Baptista of his lineage and his desire to woo Katherine. Baptista says she'll never agree but Petruchio persists, introducing Hortensio (as “Licio”), who he says will make inroads as her banjo tutor. The others go to great lengths to outdo each other as they compete for Bianca. Gremio presents a Latin tutor (Lucentio-as-Cambio) and Tranio-as-Lucentio claims to be the son of Vincentio, “the Tomato King”. Baptista welcomes them all to his house and wishes them luck with his daughters. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Mistress Slapbottom clears the pub of all its rowdy revelers, leaving her alone with a woman who laments being tasked with ghost writing a sexist play about the taming of a shrew. She begins a page one rewrite, making the female protagonist, Katherine, a woman who loves learning and cannot stand being cooped up by the men who try to control her. We meet Lucentio and Tranio, who are visiting Padua. Strolling through the university, Lucentio is immediately smitten by Katherine's sister, Bianca, an airhead who loves being in a man's world. He conspires with Tranio to disguise himself as a tutor in order to gain access to Bianca by way of instruction. Meanwhile, Petruchio arrives in town with his trusty servant, Grumio, to visit his friends. They are greeted by Petruchio's old pal, Hortensio. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “SHREW!”, was written by AMY FREED and directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by CATHERINE EATON. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINE MINOLA and THE WOMAN WRITER ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MINOLA MARTIN KILDARE as BAPTISTA MINOLA BRETT RYBACK as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO MIKE McSHANE as GREMIO J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and THE MERCHANT DANNY SCHEIE as GRUMIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and DORCAS STEPHEN CAFFREY as VINCENTIO, THE PRIEST, AND A SERVANT TESSA AUBERJONOIS as THE WIDOW and MISTRESS SLAPBOTTOM Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. This podcast was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA AGREEMENT. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering and mixing by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “SHREW!” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTER PODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to Play On Podcasts dot com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “Better now than never, and never too late!”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Shakespeare's works are renowned around the world as some of the best ever written, so how should we feel about what just might be his worst play? In episode 336, join Luke Elliott & James Bailey as they try to find hidden meanings in the array of identity-swapping games being played by the characters, analyze a framing device that seems to go nowhere, unite in their hatred of the terrible Petruchio, and prepare for the modern retelling to come with “10 Things I Hate About You.” Full Video version available on YouTube https://bit.ly/3Xdjc1n Support the show on Patreon for bonus content (including the 1922 Nosferatu), merch, and the ability to vote on upcoming projects: https://www.patreon.com/inktofilm Get The Taming of the Shrew or any of the source novels at the Ink to Film Bookshop: https://bookshop.org/shop/inktofilm Ink to Film's Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Bluesky (@inktofilm) Home Base: inktofilm.com Luke Elliott Recent publications: “Your Black Apron Meal Kit Has Arrived” in the Even Cozier Cosmic anthology https://bookshop.org/a/23566/9781630230975 “Beyond Heaven” in the Beyond the Vanishing Point anthology: https://a.co/d/cTwnwz7 Website: www.lukeelliottauthor.com Social Media Accounts: www.lukeelliottauthor.com/social James Bailey Twitter: https://twitter.com/Jame_Bail IG: https://www.instagram.com/jamebail/ Music: Can't Take My Eyes Off You – Craymer, AIIVAWN: https://youtu.be/Rx4R8XDpMM0?si=O8QrJN1d5Eujg9Tx
The Taming of the Shrew is one of Shakespeare's earliest comedies, and was inspired by classical Roman comedy and the Italian commedia dell'arte. Baptista Minola, a rich gentleman of Padua, has two daughters: Katherina, renowned for her sharp tongue, and Bianca, who is sought after by multiple suitors. Baptista decides that Bianca cannot marry until her elder sister finds a husband. Enter Petruchio, who has come to "wive it wealthily in Padua," and who is convinced by Bianca's suitors to woo Katherina. The play ultimately poses the question of who is the bigger shrew: Kate or Petruchio. The subplot involves the subterfuge employed by Lucentio to woo the lovely Bianca.This is a dramatic reading.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
The Taming of the Shrew is one of Shakespeare's earliest comedies, and was inspired by classical Roman comedy and the Italian commedia dell'arte. Baptista Minola, a rich gentleman of Padua, has two daughters: Katherina, renowned for her sharp tongue, and Bianca, who is sought after by multiple suitors. Baptista decides that Bianca cannot marry until her elder sister finds a husband. Enter Petruchio, who has come to "wive it wealthily in Padua," and who is convinced by Bianca's suitors to woo Katherina. The play ultimately poses the question of who is the bigger shrew: Kate or Petruchio. The subplot involves the subterfuge employed by Lucentio to woo the lovely Bianca.This is a dramatic reading.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Greetings Recapsters! Kate and Sheila dive into the Shakespearean comedy, The Taming of the Shrew. Kate is the older sister that is as easy to get along with as a mama bear robbed of her cubs. Her sister, Bianca, draws suitors like bees to flowers. Here's the rub, their father forbids Bianca to wed until Kate is married. No one is up for this arduous task until Petruchio comes on the scene. He has come to Padua ‘to wive and thrive' and Kate suits his liking, however, she resists so forcefully he calls her a wasp to which she replies, “If I be waspish, best beware my sting.” How will Petruchio tame Kate? He shows up to their wedding very late wearing rags riding a nag. “He has some meaning in his mad attire.” Why was he late? What's with his clownish clothes? Maybe, absence made Kate's heart grow fonder and when he finally arrived she was thrilled that he wasn't a no show. When asked about his clothes, Petruchio replied, “To me she's married, not unto my clothes.” Then he whisks Kate away before their reception. Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘kill them with kindness'? He deprives Kate of food because it's not good enough for her. Along with a new dress and the bed which were also not suitable for his new bride. As her ‘taming' continues readers can see Kate slowly beginning to change into a better version of herself. Some say Shakespeare crossed the line here. That he is a hater of women but we beg to differ. He's using humor and wit to show something very daring for the 1590s. Are you up for a bit of comedic culture? “...There's small choice in rotten apples.” He is a wordsmith indeed, who but Shakespeare could make accident sound poetic…”'twas a fault unwilling.” The Taming of the Shrew: Act I - The Play's the Thing | Acast Love Better: Untamed Love on Apple Podcasts
Biondello tells Bianca and Lucentio that he's arranged for a priest to perform their marriage and sends them on their way as Gremio approaches. Petruchio, Kate and Vincentio arrive at Baptista's house and are greeted by the Pedant who (much to the real Vincentio's consternation) claims to be Lucentio's father. Biondello returns from the hasty marriage to find both the real and fake Vincentio with Baptista and is forced to pretend the Pedant is his master. As Vincentio berates Biondello for pretending not to know him, Tranio returns and tries to continue the ruse, claiming the Pedant is his father. Chaos ensues until Lucentio returns with Bianca. With no way out, Lucentio confesses all to his father. Vincentio, overjoyed to see his son alive, forgives him. Baptista accepts the marriage. Gremio accepts he's been beaten and joins the group for a free meal at Baptista's. Kate and Petruchio revel in their newfound love. After dinner, Petruchio challenges all the newly married men to see whose wife respects her husband the most. In the end, it's Kate who helps her husband win, ending the series with a speech about a woman's responsibility to her husband. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Grumio taunts Katherine (as instructed by his master) until Petruchio and Hortensio arrive for dinner. Petruchio rushes Kate through her meal before welcoming a tailor and haberdasher who have made exquisite clothing for Katherine. Petruchio rejects all their offerings over Katherine's objections, but she begins to catch on to his strategy, realizing that she must play along with everything Petruchio does and be “agreeable” in order to get what she wants. Meanwhile, Biondello has primed Baptista for a visit from Tranio (disguised as Lucentio) and the Pedant (disguised as Lucentio's father, Vincentio). Baptista welcomes them and seals the deal for Lucentio to marry his daughter. On the road back to Baptista's home, Kate and Petruchio keep up their game of opposites until they are met by an old man who is making his way to Padua. He introduces himself as Lucentio's father (the real Vincentio). Petruchio embraces him as family, telling him that his son has just married the sister of his wife. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Grumio reaches Petruchio's house ahead of the newlyweds and prepares the servants for their arrival. But nothing could brace them against Petruchio's abuse. He rejects the meals they've made and treats them so poorly that Kate implores him to be more patient. Petruchio insists they go straight to bed, where he lectures her on the virtues of abstinence. Meanwhile, as Tranio keeps up his Lucentio impersonation, Hortensio drops his “Litio '' persona and laments Bianca's affection for Cambio (the real Lucentio). Together, they renounce Bianca and Hortensio declares that he'll seek the affections of a wealthy widow. Free of Hortensio, Tranio celebrates with Bianca and Lucentio until Biondello arrives with the news that he's found a drunk Pedant who will be the perfect person to impersonate Luentio's father, Vincenzio. Tranio and Lucentio work up a plan to fool the Pedant into believing he's in danger in Padua because he's from Mantua but that he'll be safe if he pretends to be Lucentio's father. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
The guests assemble for the wedding but the groom is nowhere to be found. Katherina frets with her father until Biondello arrives with word that Petruchio is on his way. The groom arrives, disheveled and drunk, on a shabby horse, with his servant by his side. As the wedding finally gets underway, Tranio tells Lucentio they have to find someone to play the part of his father (Vincentio) in order to convince Baptista that Lucentio is as rich as Tranio promised in Episode Three. Gremio emerges from the church and describes Petruchio's lewd behavior at the altar. Petruchio steps out with his bride and announces that they have to be on their way. Katherina pleads with her husband to stay for the celebration but Petruchio refuses. Incensed, she rails at him, at her father and at all the guests, to no avail. The crowd gets rowdy and clamors for the feast. Petruchio puts Kate on his horse and rides off. Tranio (disguised as Lucentio) steals a moment to woo Bianca and Baptista invites everyone to eat cake. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Kate and Petruchio meet at last! The fireworks are lit and the couple goes head to head until Baptista arrives to check on their progress. Petruchio announces (over Kate's objections) that the two have agreed to marry that Sunday. Baptista celebrates the news and turns his attention to the marriage of his second daughter, Bianca. Gremio and Tranio (disguised as Lucentio) compete to prove who has the most to offer in the way of riches. Tranio outbids Gremio and Baptista promises him his youngest daughter provided Tranio can prove his father has the resources he claims. Once alone, Tranio conspires to find someone who can pretend to be Lucentio's wealthy father. Back in Baptista's house, the real Lucentio “tutors” Bianca in Latin and secretly reveals his true identity. Bianca is receptive to Lucentio's overtures but warns she needs to get to know him before she agrees to marry. Hortensio finishes tuning his lute and takes over from Lucentio to teach Bianca how to read music, whereupon he confesses his love to her. She is not nearly as receptive to this fop, who stews in anger and vows to defeat Lucentio. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
A student (and eligible bachelor) named Lucentio arrives in Padua with his servant, Tranio, to study philosophy. As they take in the sights they come across the wealthy Baptista and his two daughters, Bianca and Katherina. Bianca is trailed by two suitors, Hortensio and Gremio, who are vying for her affection. Baptista tells them that neither of them will win Bianca's hand until he marries off his older daughter, Katherina. Meantime, Baptista will keep Bianca at home, seen only by the tutors who he employs to advance her education. Hortensio and Gremio scheme to find a husband for the contrary Katherina. Lucentio, smitten by the beautiful Bianca, hatches a plan with Tranio to gain access to Bianca's house by changing clothes with his servant and posing as a tutor while Tranio pretends to be Lucentio in order to build Lucentio's social profile and entertain his father's guests. When Lucentio's other servant, Biondello, arrives, Lucentio tells him that he and Tranio switched clothes because he killed a man and has to escape the city. He tasks Biondello with waiting on Tranio and instructs him to refer to Tranio as Lucentio. Elsewhere, the self-assured Petruchio, along with his servant, Grumio, arrives from Verona at his friend Hortensio's house. Hortensio greets him warmly and learns from Petruchio that he's come to Padua to find a wife from a wealthy family. Hortensio tells him about Baptista's daughter, Katherina, but warns him about her ferocious temper. Petruchio is intrigued and vows to make Katherina his wife. Hortensio offers to facilitate the introduction provided Petruchio helps him pass for a music teacher so he can get access to Bianca. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Voice and Text Coach: JULIE FOH Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 1208, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Cello 1: This cellist founded a music collective called the Silkroad Ensemble, with whom he plays cello. Yo-Yo Ma. 2: When you think of a cello solo, you're probably thinking of this Baroque composer's cello prelude from around 1720. Bach. 3: The uncrowned king of the cello, David Popper has a work titled this, what you'd sing under the window of your beloved. a "Serenade". 4: An excellent piece for the cello is "The Swan", from this work by Camille Saint-Saens. The Carnival of the Animals. 5: Portrayed on film in "Hilary and Jackie", the life of this British cellist was cut short by MS at age 42. Jacqueline du Pré. Round 2. Category: Shakespeare Play By Gradually Easier Character 1: Bianca,Roderigo,Desdemona. Othello. 2: Baptista Minola,Gremio, Lucentio,Hortensio,Petruchio. The Taming of the Shrew. 3: Doctor,Duke of Cornwall,Goneril. King Lear. 4: Snug, Helena,Oberon. A Midsummer Night's Dream. 5: Flavius,Cicero,Calpurnia. Julius Caesar. Round 3. Category: Frontwords And Backwords 1: Bosses do this, to writers' dismay; also, what happens at sea twice a day. edit/tide. 2: A part of the body where the food goes; flip it around, it's a ship that tows. gut/tug. 3: This type of container can hold ale or mead; turn it around, it's a mouth part indeed. mug/gum. 4: Rivers do this, bend upon bend; reverse it for one who sends sheep to their end. flow/wolf. 5: Your colorless dress may earn this adjective, I fear; not so for this minstrel or other balladeer. drab/bard. Round 4. Category: Stock Up On Candy 1: You definitely want to trick-or-treat at the house that gives out candy from this company with the stock symbol HSY. Hershey. 2: KRFT is Kraft Foods, maker of these Jet-Puffed treats that come in spooky shapes for Halloween. marshmallows. 3: Warren Buffett liked See's Candies so much that he bought it and folded it into BRK.B, this company. Berkshire Hathaway. 4: Mondelez, MDLZ, owns a slew of brands, including these Scandinavian candies. Swedish Fish. 5: If you're stocking up on candy at Costco (symbol COST), you'll know this house brand is named for a city in Washington. Kirkland. Round 5. Category: On The Wall 1: ...of this museum is a portrait of Elizabeth Petrovna as a child (1712-13) by Ivan Nikitin. the Hermitage Museum. 2: A special black paint from Rust-Oleum will turn any wall into one of these writing slates. a chalkboard. 3: A large, concave one of these on your wall will make your room look bigger. a mirror. 4: Divided into 20 sections, it's often made of cork; take a shot!. a dartboard. 5: Perfect for your bedroom, this item is thought to provide protection through the night. a dream catcher. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia!Special thanks to https://blog.feedspot.com/trivia_podcasts/ AI Voices used
A student (and eligible bachelor) named Lucentio arrives in Padua with his servant, Tranio, to study philosophy. As they take in the sights they come across the wealthy Baptista and his two daughters, Bianca and Katherina. Bianca is trailed by two suitors, Hortensio and Gremio, who are vying for her affection. Baptista tells them that neither of them will win Bianca's hand until he marries off his older daughter, Katherina. Meantime, Baptista will keep Bianca at home, seen only by the tutors who he employs to advance her education. Hortensio and Gremio scheme to find a husband for the contrary Katherina. Lucentio, smitten by the beautiful Bianca, hatches a plan with Tranio to gain access to Bianca's house by changing clothes with his servant and posing as a tutor while Tranio pretends to be Lucentio in order to build Lucentio's social profile and entertain his father's guests. When Lucentio's other servant, Biondello, arrives, Lucentio tells him that he and Tranio switched clothes because he killed a man and has to escape the city. He tasks Biondello with waiting on Tranio and instructs him to refer to Tranio as Lucentio. Elsewhere, the self-assured Petruchio, along with his servant, Grumio, arrives from Verona at his friend Hortensio's house. Hortensio greets him warmly and learns from Petruchio that he's come to Padua to find a wife from a wealthy family. Hortensio tells him about Baptista's daughter, Katherina, but warns him about her ferocious temper. Petruchio is intrigued and vows to make Katherina his wife. Hortensio offers to facilitate the introduction provided Petruchio helps him pass for a music teacher so he can get access to Bianca. The PLAY ON PODCAST SERIES, “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW”, was written by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE and translated into modern English verse by AMY FREED. All episodes were directed by ART MANKE. Radio play by AMY FREED and LEANNA KEYES. The cast is as follows: SUSANNAH ROGERS as KATHERINA ALLEN GILMORE as PETRUCHIO ANNIE ABRAMS as BIANCA MIKE McSHANE as BAPTISTA TOM PATTERSON as LUCENTIO KYLE T. HESTER as TRANIO DANNY SCHEIE as GREMIO and CURTIS J. PAUL BOEHMER as HORTENSIO and PEDANT ROB NAGLE as GRUMIO and VINCENTIO KASEY MAHAFFY as BIONDELLO and TAILOR TESSA AUBERJONOIS as WIDOW and HABERDASHER Casting by THE TELSEY OFFICE: KARYN CASL, CSA. Original music composition, Mix and Sound Design by LINDSAY JONES. Sound engineering by SADAHARU YAGI. Mix Engineer and Dialogue Editor: LARRY WALSH. Podcast Mastering by GREG CORTEZ at New Monkey Studio. Coordinating Producer: TRANSCEND STREAMING (KYRA BOWIE and LEANNA KEYES). Executive Producer: MICHAEL GOODFRIEND. The Play On Podcast Series “THE TAMING OF THE SHREW” is produced by NEXT CHAPTER PODCASTS and is made possible by the generous support of THE HITZ FOUNDATION. Visit NEXTCHAPTERPODCASTS.COM for more about the Play On Podcast Series. Visit PLAYONSHAKESPEARE.ORG for more about Play On Shakespeare. Subscribe to Play On Premium on Apollo Plus for ad-free episodes and join our Patreon for exclusive merchandise and early commercial-free releases. Go to playonpodcasts.com for our Bonus Content, where you'll find interviews with the artists, producers and engineers who brought it all to life. And remember: “A woman may be made a fool if she has not the spirit to resist”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Don't Quill the Messenger : Revealing the Truth of Shakespeare Authorship
Steven and his wife, Annie, discuss the complexities of the relationship between Kate and Petruchio in "The Taming of the Shrew," and why that play carries such a strong level of love/hate reactions with modern actors and audiences. Support the show by picking up official Don't Quill the Messenger merchandise at www.dontquillthepodcast.com and becoming a Patron at http://www.patreon.com/dontquillthemessenger Made possible by Patrons: Brent Evans & Patty Henson, Bryan Wildenthal, Clare Jaget, Daniel Cowan, David Neufer, David R Klausmeyer, Dean Bradley, Edward Henke, Ellen Swanson, Frank Lawler, Ina Cu, James Gutierrez, James Warren, Jaymie, Jeanine Clark, Jen Swan, John Creider, John Eddings, John Guarnaccia, Jon Foss, Luís S, Sandi Boney, Sandi Paulus, Sara Gerard, Sheila Kethley, Tim Norman, Tim Price, Troy Stelzer, Vanessa Lops, Yvonne Don't Quill the Messenger is a part of the Dragon Wagon Radio independent podcast network. For more great podcasts visit www.dragonwagonradio.com
SYNOPSIS:At the beginning of this episode, a teenage “Moonlighting”' fan is forced by his mother to do his homework rather than watch the show. His homework is to read William Shakespeare's “The Taming of the Shrew.” As he is reading the book, the show transforms back in time to a day in Padua, Italy, in 1593. The main characters of “Moonlighting”' enact the remainder of the show with their version of William Shakespeare's play “The Taming of the Shrew”' in period costume and setting. Katherina's father is in search of a suitor for his feisty daughter. Along the way, many in-jokes refer to the real show, such as when Petruchio, played by David Addison, arrives in town on horseback with a BMW logo clearly visible on the saddle. Eventually, Petruchio forcibly marries Katherina while she is tied up in a church, after which he sings a rockin' version of “Good Lovin'.” He marries her for her dowry. But Katherina's father's terms of the marriage are that Petruchio must tame his bride into a dutiful and well-trained wife. The couple fight, slam doors, and provide us with the usual fast-paced dialogue, but finally fall in love. Petruchio tames Katherina, but Katherina also tames Petruchio, as shown in a touching scene in the town square.GUEST STARS:Kenneth McMillanColm MeaneyRalph DrischellHap Lawrence Curtis ArmstrongNarrator:Stirling HollowayMOONLIGHTING THE TV SHOWThe show is all about the hit TV Show Moonlighting which aired from 1985 to 1989 starring Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepherd.Grace Chivell and Shawna Saari take a look at each episode in chronological order from the Pilot to the end of the fifth and final season.They discuss the direction, the production, the outfits, the lighting, the car chases, and the tumultuous relationship between Maddie Hayes and David Addison.FOR MORE INFORMATION:https://moonlightingthepodcast.comMerchandise: https://redbubble.com/people/moonpod2016Join Our Facebook Community:https://facebook.com/groups/moonlightingthepodcasthttps://facebook.com/moonlightingthepodcastJoin Our Instagram Community:https://instagram.com/moonlightingthepodcastPURCHASE:Moonlighting: An Episode Guide Bookhttps://bit.ly/episodeguidebook on TuckerDSPressOR on Amazon:https://www.amazon.com/dp/1959748041/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3DN6VTBF173LN&keywords=moonlighting+an+episode+guide&qid=1700733543&sprefix=moonlighting+an+episode+guide%2Caps%2C933&sr=8-1To learn more about Grace:https://gracechivell.com.auMoonlighting The Podcast YouTube Channel: bit.ly/maddieanddavidTo learn more about Shawna:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCft4ALOjBZnEt4DBUvx3HvQDonate:https://ko-fi.com/moonlightingthepodcastPersonal Instagram:https://instagram.com/grace_chivellhttps://instagram.com/saari_not.saari Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
SYNOPSIS:At the beginning of this episode, a teenage “Moonlighting”' fan is forced by his mother to do his homework rather than watch the show. His homework is to read William Shakespeare's “The Taming of the Shrew.”'As he is reading the book, the show transforms back in time to a day in Padua, Italy, in 1593. The main characters of “Moonlighting”' enact the remainder of the show with their version of William Shakespeare's play “The Taming of the Shrew”' in period costume and setting.Katherina's father is in search of a suitor for his feisty daughter. Along the way, many in-jokes refer to the real show, such as when Petruchio, played by David Addison, arrives in town on horseback with a BMW logo clearly visible on the saddle.Eventually, Petruchio forcibly marries Katherina while she is tied up in a church, after which he sings a rockin' version of “Good Lovin'.” He marries her for her dowry. But Katherina's father's terms of the marriage are that Petruchio must tame his bride into a dutiful and well-trained wife.The couple fight, slam doors, and provide us with the usual fast-paced dialogue, but finally fall in love. Petruchio tames Katherina, but Katherina also tames Petruchio, as shown in a touching scene in the town square.GUEST STARS:Kenneth McMillanColm MeaneyFrank CollisonHap LawrenceMOONLIGHTING THE TV SHOWThe show is all about the hit TV Show Moonlighting which aired from 1985 to 1989 starring Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepherd.Grace Chivell and Shawna Saari take a look at each episode in chronological order from the Pilot to the end of the fifth and final season.They discuss the direction, the production, the outfits, the lighting, the car chases, and the tumultuous relationship between Maddie Hayes and David Addison.FOR MORE INFORMATION:https://moonlightingthepodcast.comMerchandise: https://redbubble.com/people/moonpod2016Join Our Facebook Community:https://facebook.com/groups/moonlightingthepodcasthttps://facebook.com/moonlightingthepodcastJoin Our Instagram Community:https://instagram.com/moonlightingthepodcastPURCHASE:Moonlighting: An Episode Guide Bookhttps://bit.ly/episodeguidebook on TuckerDSPressOR on Amazon:https://www.amazon.com/dp/1959748041/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3DN6VTBF173LN&keywords=moonlighting+an+episode+guide&qid=1700733543&sprefix=moonlighting+an+episode+guide%2Caps%2C933&sr=8-1To learn more about Grace:https://gracechivell.com.auMoonlighting The Podcast YouTube Channel: bit.ly/maddieanddavidTo learn more about Shawna:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCft4ALOjBZnEt4DBUvx3HvQDonate:https://ko-fi.com/moonlightingthepodcastPersonal Instagram:https://instagram.com/grace_chivellhttps://instagram.com/saari_not.saari Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Behold – the late, great Edward Lionheart, a Shakespearean actor whose performances in Julius Caesar, Troilus and Cressida, Othello, Cymbeline, and others left him the laughingstock of London theatre critics, is dead. And yet somehow, someone is knocking off said critics one at a time in truly Shakespearean fashion… albeit with slight alterations to the text. Shylock may have wanted his pound his flesh – this killer takes the heart. Joan of Arc might have burned at the stake – this killer fries his victims in a hair salon. Peregrine Devlin, head of the London Critics Circle, is baffled, as are the police. And yet – the order of the killings bear a striking resemblance to Lionheart's last repertory season. What's going on with the Thames-side meths drinkers that have taken up residence in the crumbling Burbage Theatre? And what might Edward's daughter, Edwina, have to do with everything? Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend us your ears – for herein lies the tale of the deceased actor who set out to exact revenge, and succeeded, and the rest – is silence. Intro, Debate Society, Hot for Teacher (spoiler-free): 00:00-26:10Honor Roll and Detention (spoiler-heavy): 26:11-1:07:38Superlatives (spoiler-heavier): 1:07:39-1:28:17 Director Douglas HickoxScreenplay Anthony Greville-Bell, based on an idea by Stanley Mann and John KohnFeaturing Harry Andrews, Coral Browne, Robert Coote, Diana Dors, Jack Hawkins, Ian Hendry, Joan Hickson, Michael Hordern, Arthur Lowe, Robert Morley, Milo O'Shea, Dennis Price, Vincent Price, Diana Rigg, Eric Sykes Ben Viccellio is an actor, writer and Associate Professor of Drama & Film at Kenyon College. His acting credits include the role of Oedipus in Frank Galati's Oedipus Complex at The Goodman Theatre; Cherry Orchard, Theatrical Essays, and the world premiere of Men of Tortuga at Steppenwolf; the role of Petruchio in Short Shakespeare: Taming of the Shrew, Macbeth in Short Shakespeare: Macbeth, and Guildenstern in Hamlet at Chicago Shakespeare Theatre. Ben has also also acted for film and television, as well as in the odd commercial... some of them, he claims, very odd. His writing for the stage has been produced in Chicago, Los Angeles, New York and Aspen. Our theme music is by Sir Cubworth, with embellishments by Edward Elgar. Music from Theatre of Blood by Michael J. Lewis. For more information on this film (including why the Professor chose it, on Our Blog), the pod, essays from your hosts, and other assorted bric-a-brac, visit our website, scareupod.com. Please subscribe to this podcast via Apple or Google Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you like what you hear, please leave us a 5-star rating. Join our Facebook group. Follow us on Instagram.
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 1076, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Chicago Tv 1: Stacy Edwards as Lisa Catera is a doctor with commercial appeal on this series. Chicago Hope. 2: He played Chicago-based psychologist Bob Hartley. Bob Newhart. 3: Of surgeon, chef or hit man, it's the profession of Carmy, who returns to his home city to ply his trade in "The Bear". chef. 4: On "Early Edition", it's the pet that delivers the Chicago Sun-Times to Gary Hobson, a day earlier than to everyone else. Cat. 5: In 2015 this drama about Windy City doctors joined the "Chicago P.D." and "Chicago Fire" franchise. Chicago Med. Round 2. Category: That Book Gave Me A Nightmare 1: Prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi's "Helter Skelter" is an account of the crimes of this man and his followers. (Charles) Manson. 2: These monsters du jour are the villains of "The Remaining", about a plague survivor waiting in a bunker. zombies. 3: This children's author is not so innocent--a kitten is almost baked in a pie in her "Tale of Samuel Whiskers". Beatrix Potter. 4: In "The Hungry Moon", horror stalks a town in England that practices the faith of these pre-Christian priests. the druids. 5: Bearing the name of a Catholic rite, it's Whitley Strieber's supposedly true account of his abduction by aliens. Communion: A True Story. Round 3. Category: What A Dive! 1: Someone who profits, or a backwards somersault that lands feet first into the water. a gainer (full gainer). 2: You are the projectile in the name of this dive, with your knees pulled to the chest for maximum splash. a cannonball. 3: This dive named for a pocket blade involves touching your feet in the air. a jackknife. 4: This Mexican city is famous for its clavadistas, or cliff divers. Acapulco. 5: Your arms stick out to either side when you start this dive named for a waterfowl. a swan dive. Round 4. Category: Sharp 1: Cardsharp is an old term for a gambler who is notorious for doing this. cheating. 2: This synonym for a sniper has the same first and last letters as "sniper". a sharpshooter. 3: Be a sharp dresser by ironing your pants to keep these sharp. the creases. 4: Patricia Clarkson won a Golden Globe for playing Amy Adams' mom on this HBO miniseries. Sharp Objects. 5: This Chikara line of knives from this company is made of "premium Japanese stainless steel". Ginsu. Round 5. Category: Anagrammed Shakespearean Characters 1: She's a foreign queen:ALERT A COP. Cleopatra. 2: A fairy:NO ROBE. Oberon. 3: He's magical:ROSE PROP. Prospero. 4: He domesticates his wife:RIPE TOUCH. Petruchio. 5: He's a title prince:CRISP EEL. Pericles. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia!Special thanks to https://blog.feedspot.com/trivia_podcasts/ AI Voices used
Miiiiirrrrna! No novo episódio, Gil Marcel, Lari Lovisi e a convidada Natália Rocha batem um papo de novela divertido e nostálgico sobre o talento de Walcyr Carrasco ao criar três joias televisivas do horário das 18h: ‘O Cravo e a Rosa', onde o amor tumultuado de Catarina e Julião Petruchio cativou o público; ‘Chocolate com Pimenta', que apresentou a doce vingança de Aninha Francisca; e ‘Alma Gêmea', a novela que triunfou com o amor eterno de Rafael e Serena. Com sua trinca de ouro, Carrasco não apenas se consolidou como um dos maiores novelistas do nosso tempo, como também construiu uma mitologia televisiva repleta de momentos icônicos, e que continuam conquistando a audiência. Arre égua, não fique aí parado como dois de paus! Dê o play agora!
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 986, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Frock Around The Clock 1: If you want to wear a this length dress in the U.K., wear it around 4 P.M., when the steeped beverage is commonly served. tea. 2: This hyphenated style of dress containing 2 altitude extremes is perfect for noon or midnight. a high-low. 3: When it precedes "gown", this 4-letter undergarment is worn for bedtime; before "dress", not for bedtime. slip. 4: For 5 o'clock, maybe try this simple dress that has the same name as the key under "caps lock". a shift. 5: For the cocktail hour, perhaps this dress, that sounds like a good place to stash a dagger. a sheath. Round 2. Category: I Quit! 1: When he left NASA to be a Univ. of Cincinnati prof., he took one giant leap into retirement from the public eye. Neil Armstrong. 2: His sudden retirement from the NBA on Nov. 7, 1991 shocked the sports world. Earvin "Magic" Johnson. 3: In 1974, frustrated with GM's management, he quit and with British funding, built a stainless steel luxury sports car. John DeLorean. 4: On Nov. 25, 1980 Roberto Duran said, "No mas" and quit in the eighth round against this fighter. Sugar Ray Leonard. 5: In March 1987 Bettino Craxi quit after a 3 1/2-year term in this post, a post-WWII record. prime minister of Italy. Round 3. Category: In A Minute 1: Each minute 5 million of these are sent; how many of them are spam, we don't know. E-mails. 2: Men's Health magazine says the average guy can do 33 of these in a minute in his 20s, 21 in his 40s. push-ups. 3: In a June 2000 film Nicolas Cage played a guy who could do this in a minute. Steal a car. 4: Each minute it pumps about 5 quarts of blood. The heart. 5: Under the slogan "Real Estate for the Real World", this company claims on average to buy or sell a home every minute. Century 21. Round 4. Category: Last Line Of A Shakespeare Act 1: Act II of this play ends, "My Regan counsels well; come out o' the storm". King Lear. 2: Act I of this play concludes with, "The motion's good indeed and be it so, Petruchio, I shall be your Ben Venuto". The Taming of the Shrew. 3: Fortinbras ends act V and this play with "Go, bid the soldiers shoot". Hamlet. 4: Stephano tells him, "O brave monster! Lead the way". Caliban. 5: This title character declares, "He shall have every day a several greeting, or I'll unpeople Egypt". Cleopatra. Round 5. Category: Sitcom Characters 1: This mailman on "Cheers" gleaned some of his knowledge from reading the magazines he delivered. Cliff (Clavin). 2: "The Days and Nights of" this divorcee moved from NBC to the Lifetime Network in 1989. Molly Dodd. 3: This character was a "lovely lady who was bringing up three very lovely girls". Carol Brady. 4: He plays assistant football coach Luther Van Dam on "Coach". Jerry Van Dyke. 5: Name of the writer played by Rose Marie on "The Dick Van Dyke Show". Sally Rogers. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia! Special thanks to https://blog.feedspot.com/trivia_podcasts/
Director Jemma Levy discusses The Taming of the Shrew, now in rehearsal at Cincinnati Shakespeare Company and opening this week. Jemma shares her thoughts about this famously complicated play and reveals that she considers it a feminist romantic comedy; how she emphasizes its themes of performance and the shifting relationships of masters and servants; her belief that Shakespeare's women are always the smartest people on the stage; how we watch Katherine and Petruchio's first "meet-cute," then fall in love and learn each other's moves in real time; the theatrical and thematic value of including the audience; the fun of putting a bar onstage; and how Shrew compares with another complicated Shakespeare “comedy,” The Merchant of Venice. (Length 20:45)
{Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] Ugh, Die! Die! Die! - my mom (My mom actually said that.) SEASON 6 ACT III, PART VIII “The Lovers' Quarrel” The Lovers must practice an a traditional one-handed duel; They must fence whilst one arm is tied behind the back, a rope tightly held by each's own ascended master as they maneuver in the round. It is a practice of stealth, dynamic movement, and self control. Petruchio and C'esmet passionately dance in the round--the training period stands as a trial-and-error, The Ascended masters tugging at the ropes to correct their mistakes. C'esme't travels to a descended dimension to materialize her Ascended Mastery; Supacree Gains her powers not slowly, but all at once. Avicii explains how long one walks the astral void before returning home into the Kingdom of Heaven after departing. DILLON FRANCIS YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. CHAK CHEL I wasn't trying to get you killed! I was trying to get you laid! || D.J. YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. C.C. I WASNT TRYING TO GET YOU KILLED! I WAS TRYING TO GET YOU LAID. D.J. I can get laid by myself! C.C. D.J. Shut UP. The famed lovers take their place in the center of the arena; they humbly and gracefully take their battle stance, looking each other in the eye, one arm extended behind the back to face the sky, the other planted firmly, grounding them to earth. In quiet desperation, a silence falls over the entirety of the space—until, a glowing light distracts all but the two of the lovers, focused in oneness, acknowledging two qual parts of one whole. The crowd gasps and coos, as the glowing figure, masqueraded by shadows in a beam of light and colorful auras A tall figure stands equidistant to the two lovers; the triad is formed, and as he begins the yet Ū fort old ancient ritual, the lovers are overwhelmed with shock and confusion. blackout — END EPISODE Lost your shine? Lost my Skrillex! You miss it? Do I Miss—? … You know what? What. Fuck you, dude. ...no can do. [later] Are we relaxed? What is this? I need it. You fucked up. This isn't right. No, it isn't. — BLACKOUT, What happened here? Are we rolling? Cut to commercial. — Are you serious? I'm so serious!!! She's so serious. Cut to: Grocery Store, Day [over the store radio] She's a maniac, maniac on the floor!! What is she DOING? What are you doing? I'm doing me, bitch. And she's dancing like she never has before. —cut to rave— ***WUBZ*** Who is this? I'm on my own tonight. Is she drinking?!? THATS NOT FAIR! Oh, Sweet Jesus! —regular Jesus: [to sweet Jesus] aha! It's you this time. Sweet Jesus: fuck, no fair. THIS ISN'T SKRILLEX. Sweet Baby Jesus. Sweet Jesus: (relieved) YES. Regular Jesus: oh, you're saved. Nice. [ JESUS passes BABY JESUS to SWEET JESUS, then footballing the infant into the outer realms, dusting his hands off and flexing.] Send the Messiah. Wait, which one? Yeah, whose Messiah? Cut back to: the rave ...Who's baby is this? Woah, cool baby. I respect that. [the third raver simply lifts his diffraction glasses, astonished by the bedazzling baby Jesus's vibe.] Wait, Baby Jesus is bedazzled? MAYBE: Cut to: A flash of the alternate dimension, where indeed baby Jesus is Bedazzled.] Cut back to: No, his vibe. Is he sparkling? It's his aura. Oh. Pfft. Lol. Okay. —- First of all, I've never had this many black friends before. .. Oh, my God… I am alarmed. She's so stupid… Actually, just ugly—! Eyyy. Woahhh! But now I'm— You're a fan. Hey—I ate a fan for breakfast—okay?! Literally. OKAY. Ew, gross. Just kill me. [without hesitation] No—Ze Rulez. [Lowers Rave Weapon] __ I'm highly allergic— —Don't need Skrillex. Brought my own! — [stabs self] What is that? Oh shit, it's the EPI(c)PEN OH SHIT. Nice. It also writes. After the stab? Usually after, yes. You, have to. Oh, yeah, huh? No, you actually have to stab yourself first with it—or else it won't write. — Anyway—what were you trying to write? ...fuck, I forgot. Good job, Sonny. ___ Take me back! You wanted this. I wanted NOTHING. You got there! Agh!! Then when you did, you wanted to leave. There's no music. It's literally NOTHING. Except Jimmy Fallon. WHAT?! Since when?! What? Since literally ever. What?! No way. Let me see. Let me see. Oh my—WOAH. Let me see. Nothing is something! Unh-uh bro! What the— IT IS JIMMY FALLON. There's this cricket that lives Somewhere near here, When I hear him I think of the song He sings and all I think is “I wish someone would sing for me, I wish someone would sing for me” If he makes me cry one more time... “One last time, We gonna celebrate” If there's an album, there's going to be a tour; If there's a tour, I'm gonna wanna see him And it's just infinite, isn't it-- Infinite, isn't it? There's no point to it; There's really nowhere safe, that I could run from him A class act An a plus A sad actor with black magic A bad pastor with bad habits A black cat, and a hat and in it Is everything I ever imagined If there's an album, There's going to be a crowd I'm gonna want to be in it And it's just infinite isn't it Can't live with Skrillex Can't go on tour with him Maybe I just, Settle down in this awful town While I try to figure out, What this is about And if this is about Skrillex How did I get into it? If this is Skrillex How do ___ AHHHH DUDE. AHHH THIS ISN'T HAPPENING. Ahhhh man. What the fuck. This is--did you Put The Skrillex in The Skrillex, like I said? ...I… ...did you put the Skrillex in The Skrillex? Skrillex-Skrillex Put the-the Skrillex in the Skrillex Skrillex-t-Skrillex-Skrillex Skrillex is Skrillex-Skrillex OH SHIT. YOU DON'T REMEMBER WRITING ‘THE SKRILLEX SONG'? I DIDN'T WRITE IT! YOU WROTE IT. She's denying it. Oh, She stole all ya'll music. She took all of my songs. All of them? I mean, not all of them--just the bangers. I'm not going to Mexico for Dillon Francis. “The Interrogation” SUPACREE pays the incarcerated SKRILLEX under observation a series of visits, using her invisibility cloak. [[*This would be along the same storyline (using a linear “time”) where SUPACREE has gained most of her abilities, and is also terrorizing Dillon Francis (*interns scene). So. What? Just to get this straight; Nobody can see SUPACREE? Right. But she's--basically--beating the shit out of people. Yeah, she's just... fucking shit up. But nobody can see her. No. At all. No. Nobody at all, just the DJ's. Starting with-- D1-Skrillex D2-DIllon Francis D3-SUPACREE (Wait, how the fuck?) Scary Monsters and SUPACREE. Well, which comes first? What? Which movie? I--What? In order. Order? Like...wait, what are you saying? When you put them in order-- Order?? ORDER!!! Bruh. I just got a dick pic from Dillon Francis. What? By like, accident? I don't think it was an accident… It had to be... It has a personalized greeting, with my name in it. What? Let me see--! (Look) I mean--not “let me see”, I just meant--the greeting. Like, what did it say? Dude-- Damn, that's… Yeahhhh man! Was there a show tonight? Maaaayyybe, I don't know where it would be... Yo dude, I'm calling--WOAH. What dude? I got a message from him too! Oh shiiiit, what's it say? Should I even open it? Open it! What if it's his dick, bro? Open it! [Opens it.] OHHH. It's his dick, bro. Oh SHIT, what the fuck HAPPENED? What did happen? Does yours have a message? What did happen…? I feel like--wait, is that--huh. What does the message say? It does have a message...wait--let me see yours again. What the fuck for? [staring at phone, cocking head slowly to one side] ((Ohh, I like this, the audio pans like--)) I feel like mine's at a different angle. A different angle--wh--let me see. [shows phone] [cocks head to the side slowly, returning to his phone to compare the photos] Oh shit, that is at a different angle. With different lighting! Whatthefuuuck. Dude. _ Well, what did you do when you were Skrillex? A lot. _ Yo. That dude has like 16 passports. I had a lot of fun as Qua Long. _ Shenanigans As Dillon Francis-- Oh shit, this is gonna be a long list. It's actually not that much. (It's a lot) Dillon Francis sits at his desk in his Lair/Office. A pile of legal paperwork is stacked in front of him. ((Oh shit, where's the scene where he's got the glasses?)) Which...glasses… Aw fuck. Oh, right--cause he has a-- He has an entire series. How the fuck did Dillon Francis get to be Captain of the Motherfucking Bampheramphs?! FUCK that, he's not my captain. He's your captain. He is not my Captain. That is not my President. I'M THE CAPTAIN NOW! **Insert: This Is: Dillon Francis Here Damn dude. Dillon Francis needs an entire character analisis (Okay, keep that misspelling, that's hilarious. Anyway) *Analysis I think I might have to write one. Can we not? I mean. Yo dude, i”m like half capacity for Dillon Francis Half, is….half. Well, I mean it's corona virus so-- Fragments of Mr. Francis Blasted analysis Need a dialysis just to get this Sk- Shit out my system. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I shout out curses. Now I speak clown I'm an Owl out of water. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I create languages I see the stares On blank faces I paint the canvas With blood and with ashes I leave on the pavement First of all, These park and raves are crazy Electric Daisy is inside me Everybody's at the party All the stars aligning And all the patrons waiting, waving ___ I call him “The Ghost” You never know where he goes, And the music follows No forward But I know, I know He's The Ghost Producer And I'm just a Loser _ Ive never seen this one before! Me neither. That's great. Something new. Well-something old, something new--it's Skrillex. Yeah, but I like Skrillex. We all like Skrillex Wow. Oh, the fan..family. Family? Family, wait-- AGH, THIS MUSIC IS DISTRACTING ME. It was so clear, and then it just-- Yeah, Vanished? Yeah. Yeah. [A Silence.] A circle of dancing people summon wishes out of the center of their Concentrical Circle. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. What. I'm pretty sure this already happened. I remember that. What? That never happened Uh. It did. It happened like, last season-- --LAST SEASON? --maybe even the season before that. What! I thought we were watching the Pilot! I THOUGHT THIS WAS A MOVIE. This is the third movie. THE THIRD MOVIE? Wait--when did you get here? I...have always been here. [beat.] She's been going on like this for two days. Oh My God. Yes. Have you tried to stop her? No, it's too good; Plus, she can sense us coming it's--watch this. Queue the passerby. A passerby moves towards the garden in the far east corner of the observatory; Are you recording all of this? Even better; We're broadcasting it. To WHO? (in space, in what (was thought to be, anyway) a Void in the unknown. Uh, it WAS a void in the unknown, until a satellite crossed into it) What the fuck, is that a Satelite? A satellite! A satellite? Which satellite? I've got dozens of satellites. Dozens? *Thousands Elon Musk: ...Was it one of mine? (It was) ((To literally nobody's surprise)) (((Literally))) Literally, nobody--because literally nobody ever existed, ever. Until this happened. WHAT IS THIS? Have you seen this? No. Well, you're in it. Okay? I'm in a lot of shit. We all are. But not this. (yes you are) What was that? What was what? You need to burn this. Burn it… Nobody can ever see it. Okay. I just took 6 Xanex. 6! YES. And ⅓. And a third. Okay. Yes. 6 and ⅓. This, This. This is why. Why what? Why he looked at me like that. Like what? [A look.] But how could he have even known; Where could he have ever been, that I was that would make it make sense. Well, we know the Why. This is why. So now--How. How, now Brown Cow? Okay, honestly--it's almost funny now, because yeah--I'd probably also react that same way if I knew someone was going to write that about me. Yeah, I panicked. Panicked; I had a heart attack. Have you seen that thing? Yeah, it's massive. It is massive it's-- --God, it's ridiculous. --It's almost atrocious. Yikes. Yeah. I've been inside of this story before. Oh? I've been inside all of them. I see. Most of them, I just choose to forget. What makes it so that you choose? _ I actually stopped breathing. For how long? Forever. It was nice. _ You...made this…? I...yeah. You cooked me breakfast. I enjoy cooking. Well, thank you. Welcome. DEAD. How did-- Alright. So these two planets. Yeah. Two different galaxies? I guess. Okay. _ First of all that party was lit as fuck and you missed it. I didn't miss it, I just... attended at a limited distance. Chak Chel's set. Doooog. It was. (MM.) Bruh, I just miss when SNAILS was Captain. That was fun times. Too bad we can't go back. ...we can go back... No, dude don't-- Ted, Ted, and Ted meet Todd, Todd, and Todd at Lost In The Sauce Lands. So basically--all 6 of them fuck up at the same time and end up In this-- It's basically a void that lasts infinitely at Lost Lands. Oh shit. _ You better quit it, before you get Stuck in The Skrillex. [The Skrillex Tar Pits] _ Have you ever seen a mosh pit at-- -- Skril-- NO. I'm not ready to talk about it. --Dillon Francis-- It was really therapeutic. -it was nice, they had protective equipment -there was a line, and a queue -it was literally the safest moshpit I've ever attended. Meanwhile, at the Skrillex concert: I'M NOT READY. - Well, that was nuts. Please. No amount of marijuana is going to make you capable of understanding-- I'm not trying to understand, i'm trying to cope; okay? This nigga has magical powers. --And then what?-- Is she still on fire? (an explosion) Yes. Is she still on fire? (several explosions) Maybe. There were so many bombs. (((But the worst?))) “The Nigga Conniption” Oh, shit, is that what we're calling it? Where did he get it? He didn't “get it”, he just had it. How could he just “have it.” I had to do something; They were going to kill him. What happened to your “survival of the fittest” This is different. How is it different? This is different because he isn't sick, or defective--he's just...created… …? ...differently. So it's different. Woah. That's a lot of shit. It is a lot. What the fuck. I swear to GOD i've been in this WOBBLE for over a MINUTE NOW. Ahhhh, there you are-- Ah, The Wobbles. Here, we meet: -mr. wobble -the wobble monster and some other wobble people who live in the wobble. Bruh. I am so tired. What does this dude eat for breakfast? I guess we insert that scene with Dillon Francis here, right? (((Yup.)) So, to this festival… YESTIVAL. Oh shit, is that what we called it? YES. oh shit, because-- EVERYTHING IS YES. (Everything was yes.) ((It was.)) (((It still is.))) The Venga Bus. The Double Dutch Bus. Whatever that is. The Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile. That strange Double Decker from Harry Potter. T h e S o u l T r a i n Did it have a name? I don't know. I don't have time for the internet right now. Now they call me “the internet” Okay, wait-- Yeah. So. Next time I die, that's it--everything just stops. Yes. _ Eventually I'm gonna get sick of this shit and just sit But that's someday, And todays not it; It's lit About to hit TiTs and Hit the Highway, And I'm on the way Cause I was born to rage. DaDa Life. Ahhs, those were the days. The golden age of rave… FIRST OF ALL PASQUALE, THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS. (Overhead of EDC) YOU DID THIS. [that's a neutral] Is she yelling at him? I think she's more proud and impressed, but pissed at the same time, because he's just so nonchalant and calm about it. Oh please, that nigga is not calm. Face. Have you seen his eyes? They're wild. Wild, I tell you. OKay what the fuck is happening; Pasqualle's eating Twinkies right now. Dude, the world is ending. I don't think the world is “ending”, it's just...something's probably wrong with it or something. [[watching virtual rave]] oh yes, something is wrong with it definitely. What is actually happening right now. This shit just lifted us into space-- --this isn't it, is it?-- What, at the rave? You're still at that rave? You have reception in space?...Hello… Oh Hell No. My Phone cut off! I still have reception. Who do you have T Mobile (but later) Bruh, I just lost service. What? Oh no. Oh, what-- I still have service. What? When did you get here? Who the fuck are you? I've...always been here. What, no you haven't, I-- Shh. Here. What? How do you have service? What carrier is this? GOOGLE. I don't know--have you asked Google about it? No, fuck that, I don't want to talk to Google about it--she's just going to make me over analyse everything-- Maybe you should over-analyse it. No. Hey man, the word ‘analysis' is starting to look funny. Of course it looks funny, it starts with ‘anal' Who starts with ‘anal'? Touchy. Hooe shit, have you seen that bitch? She's scary. She's a bit scary. Did she say that? I believe it. I don't know if I believe it. BELIEVE IT. Wait, you're Naruto? In the flesh! WHY! Why am I Naruto? WHY ARE YOU IN THE FLESH?! How did you DO this? You did-did. I did not DO this; I couldn't DO this! You can do anything. But I didn't! But you can. You can do everything. You are everything. But i'm not. Alright. Then you're not. WHAT? If you honestly believe that--or whatever you honestly believe--then that's facts. Damn, she put you in a “Fuck You” Chamber. [*ding!* FUHCKYOU] What did you DO. Yo, what did you doooo. What did you do to this girl, oh my god dude; I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU. I HATE-- Oh now, dear; Hate is such a strong word. Ohh. It's a Skrillex. S K R I L L E X It is. Looks Fragile. Should we grab it? FIRST OF ALL, --Goddammit, dude-- “IT”, is a HE. Okay, DAMN. DAMN? OKAY. [she does.] Damn. Yeah. So that's what “Damn” is. Lol the first damnation. Hey-- Hi-- Okay, what if-- What if: THAT'S the name of your Supergroup? I wanted to call us “Trifecta” Here? yeah , right here. This is where you want your Kingdom? ...Yeah, right here. ...Okay... Okay. {A look} K bye. _ I've been at this rave for 57 days. _ Okay. Ya'll. Okay, ya'll! No. Guys. We gotta get out of here. What? Noooo. We're just getting started. No. Guys. I'm serious. Something is happening. “I see dead people” ...Freddy Mercury? Really. Uh huh. At a rave. Yes. In space. We did go to space, yes. Okay. Simpson? Yes. I'm gonna need you to take the day off. he's crazy He's not crazy, he's just gay! he's craaazy gay. _ Okay. But how do you know him? he's my ex. No he isn't. Who is it? (sighs) it's...my ex. WHAT? Check. Mate. Bitch. __ Mm. I know her. Who--Billie Ellish-- [Nods] What? Take me to her. Take you...to Billie Ellish. If that's what you're calling...her... now...yes. “now”? Mmhmm. Lady, how old are you--and what is this shit? Hm. (squints) try it. (sus) UH, no…? Suit yourself. It's there if you ever want it. (later) Dillon Francis is searching frantically for extra magic when-- [He comes across the flask, and snatches it.] WOW. Yeah, I know; it's crazy, right? You just found him like this? I did. Where was he? I tripped over him at a bus stop. Woah. Bro, that's so mean. Okay What did Dillon Francis do to you? He knows what he did. He does? No. (He actually does.) Oh, I knew it! ((You should know it, you wrote--)) THE END. ___ What is your favorite invention? Of mine? Yeah. Hmm…. (((Ganja.))) What's your favorite color? Hmmm… (((White))) “When The Day Met The Night” Has Brenden Urie been to the future? Probably. He seems... He seems off. (He is) We all are. (You are.) Hey--who's saying that? Let me be Frank. Dooooooog. it's that part! It's that part. Shuttup! Nigga this is it--this is the shit I told you! So...how many channels is this on? It's on millions of channels throughout the interdiemensions and counting. “Millions of channels throughout the interdimensions,” Not only are we Global; We are now Interplanetary, and our Communication Technology has connected us into the outer dimensions, and intersecting parallels. Are you guys done blowing eachother up yet? UH, WHAT? You're idiots; This was supposed to be a redemption for your entire species, and you fuckwads ruined...pretty much everything. Now we have to mellow out your entire civilization-- --yeah, or annihilate it-- ---just for you backwards savages to get lifted into the Ascension. Idiots. What was that? What was what? Did you hear something? Hear what? Ouch! Ow? What's wrong? Are you Okay?! *trigger, pulled* -------------------------------------------------------BOOM--------------------------------------------------------------- S/HE CAME THROUGH MY SUBWOOFER. She came in through the bathroom window. ___ No, no, no--let me be the DJ. You're already the DJ. Heh. I wanna be the DJ. What were you saying? I don't know. Something Something Sonny Something. So she took 6 Xanex, and #Adderall It was just a long day, that's all… And then I hear Skrillex is on his way HERE? Damn. No. I'm not okay. So, I... Damn dog, she lost it. She lost it. I ovet is. huh. Oh man, he was on one. I'm on one. Fuck it, I'm On One. Fuck. What happened? What happened? What happened? Well, that's tragic. Wait--this is a tragedy? No, it isn't--it's a comedy. No, it isn't-it has Sad Dillon Francis. Exactly. If it has sad Dillon Francis in it, it's tragic. It's supposed to be dramatic. Dillon Francis was crying in it? That's fantastic. That's hilarious. Sad Dillon Francis? I don't want to see sad Dillon Francis! He's a bad actor. Then i'll be sad. We're all sad. Oh, you're right--we're all sad. Oh. He is actually not a bad actor. He was really good in it. Oh, my God--it was really good. Are you serious? I'm not watching it. It's nominated for an Oscar. I'm not watching it. C'mon man --do you know how long it took to get my hands on this? They have them at Fantastik. Do you know what I had to do? It was not cool. Bro, it was so cool! So goood. He is, he's good. What has he done! This is bad. This is very bad. KLIPTOWN EMPYREAN, OH I GET IT, IT'S-- Sop. Okay? You're never gonna get it. ‘Nah, you're never gonna get it. Never ever gonna get it DUDE. WHAT? WRITE THE FUCKIN MOVIE. WHICH ONE? I DON'T KNOW--THE ONE THAT GETS US OUT OF HERE. How'd you learn how to do that? Do what? Does he know? No, he doesn't. He doesn't know. Oh. Oh, he doesn't know what he did? Nah, not yet. Wow. Have you seen this? [Looks] (Not Impressed) Now I have. What d you think-- I don't. That it's like, magic, or...what is that. I don't know what it is. Well...what do you think it is? I don't think, I just listen; and if anything sounds interesting, I just send it in. Interesting like this? [plays it] CUT TO: [stops it] This is interesting. They stare into The Box. I'm glad you did this in person. No one else can know about this; Not even our affiliates. Not even-- Nobody. Woah, it actually came back I told you, if it was a good idea, it would always come back. It...I guess. Besides, it's already happened. It's just playing over. “Do I Know you?” “Do you?” Damn. This shit gets deep. I don't get how it's deep. And I don't get how it's DIllon Francis. I can't even imagine how this happened. Imagine Dragons. That's--I'd rather--not. Anyway, why is she cooking this nigga breakfast? Because he's dead, he should have a nice breakfast. Yeah, you're probably right. BILLIE ELLISH I---like that scythe. SUPA CRYPT KEEPER It's nice, right? BILLIE ELLISH Yeah. I like it. SCK You like it? Have it. BILLIE ELLISH It's mine? SCK Yah! If you like it so much, just take it-- CUT TO DILLON FRANCIS DUDE, SHE TOOk ONE OF MY MAGNETS. CUT BACK TO BILLIE ELLISH Nice! Besides, I have another one just like it--but tiny. TINY SCYTHE. Have you seen this Billie Ellish kid? Oh wow. Yeah, she's kind of terrifying. BILLIE ELLISH is an Old Soul. (it's true, she actually is) A really, really old soul. Who is this. I like it. Are You Okay? Not really, but-- (Shrugs) That's it? That was the fast? Yup. But it was so short. Sometimes it is. But now what? What else do you want? I...don't know how to do this. Sure you do,you just do it. You don't know how you shine the sun, you just do it Just do it! JUST DO IT, NIKE. Is this your knife? I...yes. [they fight] Is this your knife? I... maybe... [they fight] Is this...your I-- [winces] CUT TO: Now, give me your hat. What, why?! GIVE ME YOUR HAT. Damn dude, Skrillex is kicking ass and taking names all day in this. What movie is this? *This is the dimension where pretty much, everything is Skrillex. Well, Everything is Skrillex. Is this the one with the Bellagio Fountain? I think it is. Nigga. He remixed it. He what? The Conniption. He remixed it. What? “The Conniption”; that's what people are calling it. Oh... Yeah. Bruh. Look at-- OH MY GOD. Bro..you leave the fandom, you leave the kingdom. What Kingdom? Dog, this isn't a Kingdom, it's just random. Bro, people LOVE IT. Now they want you to do a collab together. A collab with Skrillex? I can't afford a collab with Skrillex.. You have to do a collab with Skrillex! Uh, I don't have to do anything. Especially that. ___ You're getting residuals off my existence. I am your existence. SKRILLEX is a SUPERSTAR DJ. -&- SUPACREE is a SUPERSTAR DJ. WARNING: This combination is potentially hazardous. WARNING. ! ! ! X___X WARNING. __ ...is there something you need me to do? It's... hard to talk about it... Then don't, you don't have to speak, at all, you know. Oh what, he's telepathic? Homeotelepathy. What is that? BRO, WHAT IS YOUR POWER. Dude, I don't want to see Skrillex. That shit is terrifying. You're terrified of Skrillex? [Plays three clips] ...yeah, dude. Okay, so basically. Wow, he's a rocket scientist. How did you get to this Planet? What Planet. Oh, Goddamn him. Well, t-- Then we just LARPED. Wow that's... Oh, it got violent. Are you Finished with the Skrillex? Not yet. DUDE, DID YOU KNOW? NO! DID HE KNOW? NO! (((YES.))) AGH. I hate this place! Everything is YES. You're a fucking idiot. Oh yeah, you're a fucking Skrillex. How about that? Call me Skrillex again, you little bitch--just look me in the eye and say it. Skrillex. __ Hey, I know this magic… Magic, this is all magic. Yeah, I know this guy; This is Jimmy Fallon's magic. (Good job, bro.) Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. What the fuck I thought it was a planet. *Ahem. Jimmy Fallon's Magic Galaxy. Oh, wow. Alright, then. WHAT. Jimmy Fallon isn't a Bampheramph. Actually, he just made Captain. You're kidding. No, that was... that just happened. Jimmy Fallon. (Obviously) Come with--actually, you can stay right there. What? Just stand right there. ...and that's his magic. How does he have that? What did he ask for? What did you give him? What did he ask for? What did you give him?! Oh My God. You can't just go around granting wishes! I was just trying to manage these prayers, one-handedly. You can't just answer all the prayers as “wishes granted” that's why we have this system. Christ. No, not me--not today, Satan; I can't TAKE IT. JESUS CHRIST. Nah, he quit. What?! BUT. You got me now, so. Who the FUCK are you? I'm..uh... What are they calling me? They don't know it's you, they're still calling you Jesus. Well of course they still worship Jesus. Which Jesus? Well, any Jesus--All The Jesus. It was all the Jesus. All the Jesus. Magic Israel? A Ziptie machine? A “Stud Finder” IT WORKED. Of course it works. Well, no use crying over spilled Skrillex. But what do we do with it? Well, we're just going to have to get rid of it. Get rid of it? Fuck that! Didn't you say you wanted to *sissappear? Yes. Then get out of here. It is-- No, this isn't. This is his. No it isn't--it isn't Skrillex. What do you mean “It isn't Skrillex”? It's Skrillex. It isn't Skrillex. What are you talking about--it's-- I made this. What? No, it's. It's me. I did this. She's not mad at him, or anything In fact, She's just a fragment Or a figment or a magnet, that managed to stick In his imagination I hang out in this memory It's bad, But I keep going back-- I thought maybe I could manage it Keep it from happening But it just keeps happening And hasn't yet I have to see him. His eyes. He's hiding it. I know where the rest is. Skrillex has it. I'm dying, right? I have to be dying. You're dead. But I'm dying. I've been here before and I've felt it. Tokyo? High rise. Sounds Nice. Check the price on a flight. Likewise, I've tried to find this guy about a million times. I know where he hides it. So, how does it end? It just ends. yeah --but how does it end? It just...ended. You actually have to leave, to get out of here. NO… Don't do it. Don't do what? I didn't do anything. This is the way she wanted it. JUMP. Jump--now? Are you sure? This morning my mind was made up; I was going to Thailand for over a month. Sweet, and Rich-- But Flaky Like a pastry in the morning; Seems like a great treat but really, He's no good for me So we'll have a Mexican Wedding Damn. How did Dillon Francis get so high up??? Well, I found him hanging from a tree, so. OH FUCK, I GET IT-- HE IS GERALD. Damn. I don't know how to explain this… Oh shit, I get it; I'm Gerald. - — NEXT EPISODE: CESMET AND PETRUFHEIO are beyond overwhelm; GIAN stands before them, taking a respectful bow as he, too joins them in battlestance, which cannot be broken in physical stature, however the focused energy between the triad raises the entire colleaium into a total chaos and commotion. GIAN?! What is this? Who are you? GIAN, serious and stern, unusual to his demeanor, scoffs, as he focuses on C'esme't, acknowledging her presence in consciousness, and all respect. Petrutheio, face reddened, implodes with anger, nearly breaking his stance. Go ahead, Pet— That's Your Highness— —you can't win— —I already have— —He'll kill you. —he's already dead— Aren't we all? C'esme't, the only of the triad having actually experienced all forms of death, aoftens her gaze, entering into cosmic ompinpotence I'm having a hard time Getting started With this project Probably because I just want off this planet Cause it's lovelies; I'm honest with my thoughts, And now I'm lost in them I'm lost without you Lost another pair of socks, In the common laundry room I'm just an everyday, ordinary Motherfucking wannabe, a DJ But I wanna be a mother one day I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning Nothing's ever better Then the taste of butter; Dug you up to wonder what the fuck was up With all the rubber ducks Inside my cup, or tub I'm just a cuck I guess you really love her, huh I really love the one, I really love I really love My other husband— Huh I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning [SHOT] If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning [SHOT] Just a warning shot to shut you up, You little fucking slut Enough's enough Another lover, motherfucker Suck it up, you cunt You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us I dug you up to hug you, But all you are is just Some bones, dressed in new clothes I took your skull home And I put it on my mantle, Make a wish, —and then I blow the candle Out. Huh C'esme't has secretly turned to self-harm, in the midst of her ongoing emotional crisis due to Petruchio's arrogance and deliberate carelessness; she begins to fear for her Selfl, as she discovers during a match in her reflective state that she is recently unable to cry, hardened by her stubbornly aggressive counterpart, C'esme't draws the blood of her palm, which she spills onto the sundial in the labyrinth; she is startled and surprised shamefully by Gian, who, though normally calm becomes diffuse, and sent into a powerful fury of sadness and rage-- She reveals to Gian, in his onset of tears that she herself has been unable to cry, to which he deflates as she comforts him, holding his as he weeps glistening streams of ‘conscious tears, crying quite physically for the two of them, blood mixing with his tears as he grasps s cesmet's wounded palm, gripping it to his cheek; His intrinsic healing powers are revealed as his tears begin to mend the deep wound; Meanwhile, Petrutheio becomes irritated, as he is forced to continue pausing a Jester's Match, stricken with excruciating pain in his own palm; Attempting to ignore it, he continues forward with his match, but is irreversibly injured when s when his palm becomes again singed with pain and he is stricken by his opponent; He falls to the ground, clutching his palm, immediately knocked unconscious. He fades into a dream. PETRUTHEIO, YOU TELEPATHIC HACK! Oh, so you finally acknowledge my telepathy… In the highest realm, where The One is set to assume, interwoven intoThe Golden Goddess Of The Eye— Dark Heart Artist —the Eldest consciousness in any given existence; being that of everything of Love, and Light The middle realm, where the majority of a——- What the fuck. Wait, what happened? It just ENDS!!? It just ENDED. WHAT THE FUCK. AHHHAHHHHAHAHHHH. No, no, no– WHAT THE FUCK Wait! Go back! AHHHHHHHHH. [Holding eachother screaming] Oh, look. A butterfly. WHAT. There is is. Oh. See. huh. [a calm silence] Bro. huh . Wait. we're INSIDE. {holding eachotherscreaming] My heart is in another place, And with these words we face A face to face A fight of fights The faux of foes— And so, a duel it is For you, I fawned; For you, I called— The darkest night was followed by The lightest light That Dawn could bring, And I would sing this to you, too, My love— But have no melody A melodrama, Or a comedy? Come my lover, come to me My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me What was once, Is always— Don't you see? I see you, See you, see me What we were, We always are We always are We always, always Oh, what would you do to me? Oh, what will you do to me? Oh, what did you do to me? What have you done to me? Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me I did fall; We did fight— It is love; He had fawned for me once— Oh— Love is what it always was; What we were once, We all become Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me HI, I'm Gerald. Dude, I can't tell the story of Gerald. Only Dillon Francis can do that. I concur. That's right. Gerald is his friend-- --He's my friend-- I'm not go-- And that's it. It just ends. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.
{Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] Ugh, Die! Die! Die! - my mom (My mom actually said that.) SEASON 6 ACT III, PART VIII “The Lovers' Quarrel” The Lovers must practice an a traditional one-handed duel; They must fence whilst one arm is tied behind the back, a rope tightly held by each's own ascended master as they maneuver in the round. It is a practice of stealth, dynamic movement, and self control. Petruchio and C'esmet passionately dance in the round--the training period stands as a trial-and-error, The Ascended masters tugging at the ropes to correct their mistakes. C'esme't travels to a descended dimension to materialize her Ascended Mastery; Supacree Gains her powers not slowly, but all at once. Avicii explains how long one walks the astral void before returning home into the Kingdom of Heaven after departing. DILLON FRANCIS YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. CHAK CHEL I wasn't trying to get you killed! I was trying to get you laid! || D.J. YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. C.C. I WASNT TRYING TO GET YOU KILLED! I WAS TRYING TO GET YOU LAID. D.J. I can get laid by myself! C.C. D.J. Shut UP. The famed lovers take their place in the center of the arena; they humbly and gracefully take their battle stance, looking each other in the eye, one arm extended behind the back to face the sky, the other planted firmly, grounding them to earth. In quiet desperation, a silence falls over the entirety of the space—until, a glowing light distracts all but the two of the lovers, focused in oneness, acknowledging two qual parts of one whole. The crowd gasps and coos, as the glowing figure, masqueraded by shadows in a beam of light and colorful auras A tall figure stands equidistant to the two lovers; the triad is formed, and as he begins the yet Ū fort old ancient ritual, the lovers are overwhelmed with shock and confusion. blackout — END EPISODE Lost your shine? Lost my Skrillex! You miss it? Do I Miss—? … You know what? What. Fuck you, dude. ...no can do. [later] Are we relaxed? What is this? I need it. You fucked up. This isn't right. No, it isn't. — BLACKOUT, What happened here? Are we rolling? Cut to commercial. — Are you serious? I'm so serious!!! She's so serious. Cut to: Grocery Store, Day [over the store radio] She's a maniac, maniac on the floor!! What is she DOING? What are you doing? I'm doing me, bitch. And she's dancing like she never has before. —cut to rave— ***WUBZ*** Who is this? I'm on my own tonight. Is she drinking?!? THATS NOT FAIR! Oh, Sweet Jesus! —regular Jesus: [to sweet Jesus] aha! It's you this time. Sweet Jesus: fuck, no fair. THIS ISN'T SKRILLEX. Sweet Baby Jesus. Sweet Jesus: (relieved) YES. Regular Jesus: oh, you're saved. Nice. [ JESUS passes BABY JESUS to SWEET JESUS, then footballing the infant into the outer realms, dusting his hands off and flexing.] Send the Messiah. Wait, which one? Yeah, whose Messiah? Cut back to: the rave ...Who's baby is this? Woah, cool baby. I respect that. [the third raver simply lifts his diffraction glasses, astonished by the bedazzling baby Jesus's vibe.] Wait, Baby Jesus is bedazzled? MAYBE: Cut to: A flash of the alternate dimension, where indeed baby Jesus is Bedazzled.] Cut back to: No, his vibe. Is he sparkling? It's his aura. Oh. Pfft. Lol. Okay. —- First of all, I've never had this many black friends before. .. Oh, my God… I am alarmed. She's so stupid… Actually, just ugly—! Eyyy. Woahhh! But now I'm— You're a fan. Hey—I ate a fan for breakfast—okay?! Literally. OKAY. Ew, gross. Just kill me. [without hesitation] No—Ze Rulez. [Lowers Rave Weapon] __ I'm highly allergic— —Don't need Skrillex. Brought my own! — [stabs self] What is that? Oh shit, it's the EPI(c)PEN OH SHIT. Nice. It also writes. After the stab? Usually after, yes. You, have to. Oh, yeah, huh? No, you actually have to stab yourself first with it—or else it won't write. — Anyway—what were you trying to write? ...fuck, I forgot. Good job, Sonny. ___ Take me back! You wanted this. I wanted NOTHING. You got there! Agh!! Then when you did, you wanted to leave. There's no music. It's literally NOTHING. Except Jimmy Fallon. WHAT?! Since when?! What? Since literally ever. What?! No way. Let me see. Let me see. Oh my—WOAH. Let me see. Nothing is something! Unh-uh bro! What the— IT IS JIMMY FALLON. There's this cricket that lives Somewhere near here, When I hear him I think of the song He sings and all I think is “I wish someone would sing for me, I wish someone would sing for me” If he makes me cry one more time... “One last time, We gonna celebrate” If there's an album, there's going to be a tour; If there's a tour, I'm gonna wanna see him And it's just infinite, isn't it-- Infinite, isn't it? There's no point to it; There's really nowhere safe, that I could run from him A class act An a plus A sad actor with black magic A bad pastor with bad habits A black cat, and a hat and in it Is everything I ever imagined If there's an album, There's going to be a crowd I'm gonna want to be in it And it's just infinite isn't it Can't live with Skrillex Can't go on tour with him Maybe I just, Settle down in this awful town While I try to figure out, What this is about And if this is about Skrillex How did I get into it? If this is Skrillex How do ___ AHHHH DUDE. AHHH THIS ISN'T HAPPENING. Ahhhh man. What the fuck. This is--did you Put The Skrillex in The Skrillex, like I said? ...I… ...did you put the Skrillex in The Skrillex? Skrillex-Skrillex Put the-the Skrillex in the Skrillex Skrillex-t-Skrillex-Skrillex Skrillex is Skrillex-Skrillex OH SHIT. YOU DON'T REMEMBER WRITING ‘THE SKRILLEX SONG'? I DIDN'T WRITE IT! YOU WROTE IT. She's denying it. Oh, She stole all ya'll music. She took all of my songs. All of them? I mean, not all of them--just the bangers. I'm not going to Mexico for Dillon Francis. “The Interrogation” SUPACREE pays the incarcerated SKRILLEX under observation a series of visits, using her invisibility cloak. [[*This would be along the same storyline (using a linear “time”) where SUPACREE has gained most of her abilities, and is also terrorizing Dillon Francis (*interns scene). So. What? Just to get this straight; Nobody can see SUPACREE? Right. But she's--basically--beating the shit out of people. Yeah, she's just... fucking shit up. But nobody can see her. No. At all. No. Nobody at all, just the DJ's. Starting with-- D1-Skrillex D2-DIllon Francis D3-SUPACREE (Wait, how the fuck?) Scary Monsters and SUPACREE. Well, which comes first? What? Which movie? I--What? In order. Order? Like...wait, what are you saying? When you put them in order-- Order?? ORDER!!! Bruh. I just got a dick pic from Dillon Francis. What? By like, accident? I don't think it was an accident… It had to be... It has a personalized greeting, with my name in it. What? Let me see--! (Look) I mean--not “let me see”, I just meant--the greeting. Like, what did it say? Dude-- Damn, that's… Yeahhhh man! Was there a show tonight? Maaaayyybe, I don't know where it would be... Yo dude, I'm calling--WOAH. What dude? I got a message from him too! Oh shiiiit, what's it say? Should I even open it? Open it! What if it's his dick, bro? Open it! [Opens it.] OHHH. It's his dick, bro. Oh SHIT, what the fuck HAPPENED? What did happen? Does yours have a message? What did happen…? I feel like--wait, is that--huh. What does the message say? It does have a message...wait--let me see yours again. What the fuck for? [staring at phone, cocking head slowly to one side] ((Ohh, I like this, the audio pans like--)) I feel like mine's at a different angle. A different angle--wh--let me see. [shows phone] [cocks head to the side slowly, returning to his phone to compare the photos] Oh shit, that is at a different angle. With different lighting! Whatthefuuuck. Dude. _ Well, what did you do when you were Skrillex? A lot. _ Yo. That dude has like 16 passports. I had a lot of fun as Qua Long. _ Shenanigans As Dillon Francis-- Oh shit, this is gonna be a long list. It's actually not that much. (It's a lot) Dillon Francis sits at his desk in his Lair/Office. A pile of legal paperwork is stacked in front of him. ((Oh shit, where's the scene where he's got the glasses?)) Which...glasses… Aw fuck. Oh, right--cause he has a-- He has an entire series. How the fuck did Dillon Francis get to be Captain of the Motherfucking Bampheramphs?! FUCK that, he's not my captain. He's your captain. He is not my Captain. That is not my President. I'M THE CAPTAIN NOW! **Insert: This Is: Dillon Francis Here Damn dude. Dillon Francis needs an entire character analisis (Okay, keep that misspelling, that's hilarious. Anyway) *Analysis I think I might have to write one. Can we not? I mean. Yo dude, i”m like half capacity for Dillon Francis Half, is….half. Well, I mean it's corona virus so-- Fragments of Mr. Francis Blasted analysis Need a dialysis just to get this Sk- Shit out my system. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I shout out curses. Now I speak clown I'm an Owl out of water. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I create languages I see the stares On blank faces I paint the canvas With blood and with ashes I leave on the pavement First of all, These park and raves are crazy Electric Daisy is inside me Everybody's at the party All the stars aligning And all the patrons waiting, waving ___ I call him “The Ghost” You never know where he goes, And the music follows No forward But I know, I know He's The Ghost Producer And I'm just a Loser _ Ive never seen this one before! Me neither. That's great. Something new. Well-something old, something new--it's Skrillex. Yeah, but I like Skrillex. We all like Skrillex Wow. Oh, the fan..family. Family? Family, wait-- AGH, THIS MUSIC IS DISTRACTING ME. It was so clear, and then it just-- Yeah, Vanished? Yeah. Yeah. [A Silence.] A circle of dancing people summon wishes out of the center of their Concentrical Circle. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. What. I'm pretty sure this already happened. I remember that. What? That never happened Uh. It did. It happened like, last season-- --LAST SEASON? --maybe even the season before that. What! I thought we were watching the Pilot! I THOUGHT THIS WAS A MOVIE. This is the third movie. THE THIRD MOVIE? Wait--when did you get here? I...have always been here. [beat.] She's been going on like this for two days. Oh My God. Yes. Have you tried to stop her? No, it's too good; Plus, she can sense us coming it's--watch this. Queue the passerby. A passerby moves towards the garden in the far east corner of the observatory; Are you recording all of this? Even better; We're broadcasting it. To WHO? (in space, in what (was thought to be, anyway) a Void in the unknown. Uh, it WAS a void in the unknown, until a satellite crossed into it) What the fuck, is that a Satelite? A satellite! A satellite? Which satellite? I've got dozens of satellites. Dozens? *Thousands Elon Musk: ...Was it one of mine? (It was) ((To literally nobody's surprise)) (((Literally))) Literally, nobody--because literally nobody ever existed, ever. Until this happened. WHAT IS THIS? Have you seen this? No. Well, you're in it. Okay? I'm in a lot of shit. We all are. But not this. (yes you are) What was that? What was what? You need to burn this. Burn it… Nobody can ever see it. Okay. I just took 6 Xanex. 6! YES. And ⅓. And a third. Okay. Yes. 6 and ⅓. This, This. This is why. Why what? Why he looked at me like that. Like what? [A look.] But how could he have even known; Where could he have ever been, that I was that would make it make sense. Well, we know the Why. This is why. So now--How. How, now Brown Cow? Okay, honestly--it's almost funny now, because yeah--I'd probably also react that same way if I knew someone was going to write that about me. Yeah, I panicked. Panicked; I had a heart attack. Have you seen that thing? Yeah, it's massive. It is massive it's-- --God, it's ridiculous. --It's almost atrocious. Yikes. Yeah. I've been inside of this story before. Oh? I've been inside all of them. I see. Most of them, I just choose to forget. What makes it so that you choose? _ I actually stopped breathing. For how long? Forever. It was nice. _ You...made this…? I...yeah. You cooked me breakfast. I enjoy cooking. Well, thank you. Welcome. DEAD. How did-- Alright. So these two planets. Yeah. Two different galaxies? I guess. Okay. _ First of all that party was lit as fuck and you missed it. I didn't miss it, I just... attended at a limited distance. Chak Chel's set. Doooog. It was. (MM.) Bruh, I just miss when SNAILS was Captain. That was fun times. Too bad we can't go back. ...we can go back... No, dude don't-- Ted, Ted, and Ted meet Todd, Todd, and Todd at Lost In The Sauce Lands. So basically--all 6 of them fuck up at the same time and end up In this-- It's basically a void that lasts infinitely at Lost Lands. Oh shit. _ You better quit it, before you get Stuck in The Skrillex. [The Skrillex Tar Pits] _ Have you ever seen a mosh pit at-- -- Skril-- NO. I'm not ready to talk about it. --Dillon Francis-- It was really therapeutic. -it was nice, they had protective equipment -there was a line, and a queue -it was literally the safest moshpit I've ever attended. Meanwhile, at the Skrillex concert: I'M NOT READY. - Well, that was nuts. Please. No amount of marijuana is going to make you capable of understanding-- I'm not trying to understand, i'm trying to cope; okay? This nigga has magical powers. --And then what?-- Is she still on fire? (an explosion) Yes. Is she still on fire? (several explosions) Maybe. There were so many bombs. (((But the worst?))) “The Nigga Conniption” Oh, shit, is that what we're calling it? Where did he get it? He didn't “get it”, he just had it. How could he just “have it.” I had to do something; They were going to kill him. What happened to your “survival of the fittest” This is different. How is it different? This is different because he isn't sick, or defective--he's just...created… …? ...differently. So it's different. Woah. That's a lot of shit. It is a lot. What the fuck. I swear to GOD i've been in this WOBBLE for over a MINUTE NOW. Ahhhh, there you are-- Ah, The Wobbles. Here, we meet: -mr. wobble -the wobble monster and some other wobble people who live in the wobble. Bruh. I am so tired. What does this dude eat for breakfast? I guess we insert that scene with Dillon Francis here, right? (((Yup.)) So, to this festival… YESTIVAL. Oh shit, is that what we called it? YES. oh shit, because-- EVERYTHING IS YES. (Everything was yes.) ((It was.)) (((It still is.))) The Venga Bus. The Double Dutch Bus. Whatever that is. The Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile. That strange Double Decker from Harry Potter. T h e S o u l T r a i n Did it have a name? I don't know. I don't have time for the internet right now. Now they call me “the internet” Okay, wait-- Yeah. So. Next time I die, that's it--everything just stops. Yes. _ Eventually I'm gonna get sick of this shit and just sit But that's someday, And todays not it; It's lit About to hit TiTs and Hit the Highway, And I'm on the way Cause I was born to rage. DaDa Life. Ahhs, those were the days. The golden age of rave… FIRST OF ALL PASQUALE, THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS. (Overhead of EDC) YOU DID THIS. [that's a neutral] Is she yelling at him? I think she's more proud and impressed, but pissed at the same time, because he's just so nonchalant and calm about it. Oh please, that nigga is not calm. Face. Have you seen his eyes? They're wild. Wild, I tell you. OKay what the fuck is happening; Pasqualle's eating Twinkies right now. Dude, the world is ending. I don't think the world is “ending”, it's just...something's probably wrong with it or something. [[watching virtual rave]] oh yes, something is wrong with it definitely. What is actually happening right now. This shit just lifted us into space-- --this isn't it, is it?-- What, at the rave? You're still at that rave? You have reception in space?...Hello… Oh Hell No. My Phone cut off! I still have reception. Who do you have T Mobile (but later) Bruh, I just lost service. What? Oh no. Oh, what-- I still have service. What? When did you get here? Who the fuck are you? I've...always been here. What, no you haven't, I-- Shh. Here. What? How do you have service? What carrier is this? GOOGLE. I don't know--have you asked Google about it? No, fuck that, I don't want to talk to Google about it--she's just going to make me over analyse everything-- Maybe you should over-analyse it. No. Hey man, the word ‘analysis' is starting to look funny. Of course it looks funny, it starts with ‘anal' Who starts with ‘anal'? Touchy. Hooe shit, have you seen that bitch? She's scary. She's a bit scary. Did she say that? I believe it. I don't know if I believe it. BELIEVE IT. Wait, you're Naruto? In the flesh! WHY! Why am I Naruto? WHY ARE YOU IN THE FLESH?! How did you DO this? You did-did. I did not DO this; I couldn't DO this! You can do anything. But I didn't! But you can. You can do everything. You are everything. But i'm not. Alright. Then you're not. WHAT? If you honestly believe that--or whatever you honestly believe--then that's facts. Damn, she put you in a “Fuck You” Chamber. [*ding!* FUHCKYOU] What did you DO. Yo, what did you doooo. What did you do to this girl, oh my god dude; I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU. I HATE-- Oh now, dear; Hate is such a strong word. Ohh. It's a Skrillex. S K R I L L E X It is. Looks Fragile. Should we grab it? FIRST OF ALL, --Goddammit, dude-- “IT”, is a HE. Okay, DAMN. DAMN? OKAY. [she does.] Damn. Yeah. So that's what “Damn” is. Lol the first damnation. Hey-- Hi-- Okay, what if-- What if: THAT'S the name of your Supergroup? I wanted to call us “Trifecta” Here? yeah , right here. This is where you want your Kingdom? ...Yeah, right here. ...Okay... Okay. {A look} K bye. _ I've been at this rave for 57 days. _ Okay. Ya'll. Okay, ya'll! No. Guys. We gotta get out of here. What? Noooo. We're just getting started. No. Guys. I'm serious. Something is happening. “I see dead people” ...Freddy Mercury? Really. Uh huh. At a rave. Yes. In space. We did go to space, yes. Okay. Simpson? Yes. I'm gonna need you to take the day off. he's crazy He's not crazy, he's just gay! he's craaazy gay. _ Okay. But how do you know him? he's my ex. No he isn't. Who is it? (sighs) it's...my ex. WHAT? Check. Mate. Bitch. __ Mm. I know her. Who--Billie Ellish-- [Nods] What? Take me to her. Take you...to Billie Ellish. If that's what you're calling...her... now...yes. “now”? Mmhmm. Lady, how old are you--and what is this shit? Hm. (squints) try it. (sus) UH, no…? Suit yourself. It's there if you ever want it. (later) Dillon Francis is searching frantically for extra magic when-- [He comes across the flask, and snatches it.] WOW. Yeah, I know; it's crazy, right? You just found him like this? I did. Where was he? I tripped over him at a bus stop. Woah. Bro, that's so mean. Okay What did Dillon Francis do to you? He knows what he did. He does? No. (He actually does.) Oh, I knew it! ((You should know it, you wrote--)) THE END. ___ What is your favorite invention? Of mine? Yeah. Hmm…. (((Ganja.))) What's your favorite color? Hmmm… (((White))) “When The Day Met The Night” Has Brenden Urie been to the future? Probably. He seems... He seems off. (He is) We all are. (You are.) Hey--who's saying that? Let me be Frank. Dooooooog. it's that part! It's that part. Shuttup! Nigga this is it--this is the shit I told you! So...how many channels is this on? It's on millions of channels throughout the interdiemensions and counting. “Millions of channels throughout the interdimensions,” Not only are we Global; We are now Interplanetary, and our Communication Technology has connected us into the outer dimensions, and intersecting parallels. Are you guys done blowing eachother up yet? UH, WHAT? You're idiots; This was supposed to be a redemption for your entire species, and you fuckwads ruined...pretty much everything. Now we have to mellow out your entire civilization-- --yeah, or annihilate it-- ---just for you backwards savages to get lifted into the Ascension. Idiots. What was that? What was what? Did you hear something? Hear what? Ouch! Ow? What's wrong? Are you Okay?! *trigger, pulled* -------------------------------------------------------BOOM--------------------------------------------------------------- S/HE CAME THROUGH MY SUBWOOFER. She came in through the bathroom window. ___ No, no, no--let me be the DJ. You're already the DJ. Heh. I wanna be the DJ. What were you saying? I don't know. Something Something Sonny Something. So she took 6 Xanex, and #Adderall It was just a long day, that's all… And then I hear Skrillex is on his way HERE? Damn. No. I'm not okay. So, I... Damn dog, she lost it. She lost it. I ovet is. huh. Oh man, he was on one. I'm on one. Fuck it, I'm On One. Fuck. What happened? What happened? What happened? Well, that's tragic. Wait--this is a tragedy? No, it isn't--it's a comedy. No, it isn't-it has Sad Dillon Francis. Exactly. If it has sad Dillon Francis in it, it's tragic. It's supposed to be dramatic. Dillon Francis was crying in it? That's fantastic. That's hilarious. Sad Dillon Francis? I don't want to see sad Dillon Francis! He's a bad actor. Then i'll be sad. We're all sad. Oh, you're right--we're all sad. Oh. He is actually not a bad actor. He was really good in it. Oh, my God--it was really good. Are you serious? I'm not watching it. It's nominated for an Oscar. I'm not watching it. C'mon man --do you know how long it took to get my hands on this? They have them at Fantastik. Do you know what I had to do? It was not cool. Bro, it was so cool! So goood. He is, he's good. What has he done! This is bad. This is very bad. KLIPTOWN EMPYREAN, OH I GET IT, IT'S-- Sop. Okay? You're never gonna get it. ‘Nah, you're never gonna get it. Never ever gonna get it DUDE. WHAT? WRITE THE FUCKIN MOVIE. WHICH ONE? I DON'T KNOW--THE ONE THAT GETS US OUT OF HERE. How'd you learn how to do that? Do what? Does he know? No, he doesn't. He doesn't know. Oh. Oh, he doesn't know what he did? Nah, not yet. Wow. Have you seen this? [Looks] (Not Impressed) Now I have. What d you think-- I don't. That it's like, magic, or...what is that. I don't know what it is. Well...what do you think it is? I don't think, I just listen; and if anything sounds interesting, I just send it in. Interesting like this? [plays it] CUT TO: [stops it] This is interesting. They stare into The Box. I'm glad you did this in person. No one else can know about this; Not even our affiliates. Not even-- Nobody. Woah, it actually came back I told you, if it was a good idea, it would always come back. It...I guess. Besides, it's already happened. It's just playing over. “Do I Know you?” “Do you?” Damn. This shit gets deep. I don't get how it's deep. And I don't get how it's DIllon Francis. I can't even imagine how this happened. Imagine Dragons. That's--I'd rather--not. Anyway, why is she cooking this nigga breakfast? Because he's dead, he should have a nice breakfast. Yeah, you're probably right. BILLIE ELLISH I---like that scythe. SUPA CRYPT KEEPER It's nice, right? BILLIE ELLISH Yeah. I like it. SCK You like it? Have it. BILLIE ELLISH It's mine? SCK Yah! If you like it so much, just take it-- CUT TO DILLON FRANCIS DUDE, SHE TOOk ONE OF MY MAGNETS. CUT BACK TO BILLIE ELLISH Nice! Besides, I have another one just like it--but tiny. TINY SCYTHE. Have you seen this Billie Ellish kid? Oh wow. Yeah, she's kind of terrifying. BILLIE ELLISH is an Old Soul. (it's true, she actually is) A really, really old soul. Who is this. I like it. Are You Okay? Not really, but-- (Shrugs) That's it? That was the fast? Yup. But it was so short. Sometimes it is. But now what? What else do you want? I...don't know how to do this. Sure you do,you just do it. You don't know how you shine the sun, you just do it Just do it! JUST DO IT, NIKE. Is this your knife? I...yes. [they fight] Is this your knife? I... maybe... [they fight] Is this...your I-- [winces] CUT TO: Now, give me your hat. What, why?! GIVE ME YOUR HAT. Damn dude, Skrillex is kicking ass and taking names all day in this. What movie is this? *This is the dimension where pretty much, everything is Skrillex. Well, Everything is Skrillex. Is this the one with the Bellagio Fountain? I think it is. Nigga. He remixed it. He what? The Conniption. He remixed it. What? “The Conniption”; that's what people are calling it. Oh... Yeah. Bruh. Look at-- OH MY GOD. Bro..you leave the fandom, you leave the kingdom. What Kingdom? Dog, this isn't a Kingdom, it's just random. Bro, people LOVE IT. Now they want you to do a collab together. A collab with Skrillex? I can't afford a collab with Skrillex.. You have to do a collab with Skrillex! Uh, I don't have to do anything. Especially that. ___ You're getting residuals off my existence. I am your existence. SKRILLEX is a SUPERSTAR DJ. -&- SUPACREE is a SUPERSTAR DJ. WARNING: This combination is potentially hazardous. WARNING. ! ! ! X___X WARNING. __ ...is there something you need me to do? It's... hard to talk about it... Then don't, you don't have to speak, at all, you know. Oh what, he's telepathic? Homeotelepathy. What is that? BRO, WHAT IS YOUR POWER. Dude, I don't want to see Skrillex. That shit is terrifying. You're terrified of Skrillex? [Plays three clips] ...yeah, dude. Okay, so basically. Wow, he's a rocket scientist. How did you get to this Planet? What Planet. Oh, Goddamn him. Well, t-- Then we just LARPED. Wow that's... Oh, it got violent. Are you Finished with the Skrillex? Not yet. DUDE, DID YOU KNOW? NO! DID HE KNOW? NO! (((YES.))) AGH. I hate this place! Everything is YES. You're a fucking idiot. Oh yeah, you're a fucking Skrillex. How about that? Call me Skrillex again, you little bitch--just look me in the eye and say it. Skrillex. __ Hey, I know this magic… Magic, this is all magic. Yeah, I know this guy; This is Jimmy Fallon's magic. (Good job, bro.) Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. What the fuck I thought it was a planet. *Ahem. Jimmy Fallon's Magic Galaxy. Oh, wow. Alright, then. WHAT. Jimmy Fallon isn't a Bampheramph. Actually, he just made Captain. You're kidding. No, that was... that just happened. Jimmy Fallon. (Obviously) Come with--actually, you can stay right there. What? Just stand right there. ...and that's his magic. How does he have that? What did he ask for? What did you give him? What did he ask for? What did you give him?! Oh My God. You can't just go around granting wishes! I was just trying to manage these prayers, one-handedly. You can't just answer all the prayers as “wishes granted” that's why we have this system. Christ. No, not me--not today, Satan; I can't TAKE IT. JESUS CHRIST. Nah, he quit. What?! BUT. You got me now, so. Who the FUCK are you? I'm..uh... What are they calling me? They don't know it's you, they're still calling you Jesus. Well of course they still worship Jesus. Which Jesus? Well, any Jesus--All The Jesus. It was all the Jesus. All the Jesus. Magic Israel? A Ziptie machine? A “Stud Finder” IT WORKED. Of course it works. Well, no use crying over spilled Skrillex. But what do we do with it? Well, we're just going to have to get rid of it. Get rid of it? Fuck that! Didn't you say you wanted to *sissappear? Yes. Then get out of here. It is-- No, this isn't. This is his. No it isn't--it isn't Skrillex. What do you mean “It isn't Skrillex”? It's Skrillex. It isn't Skrillex. What are you talking about--it's-- I made this. What? No, it's. It's me. I did this. She's not mad at him, or anything In fact, She's just a fragment Or a figment or a magnet, that managed to stick In his imagination I hang out in this memory It's bad, But I keep going back-- I thought maybe I could manage it Keep it from happening But it just keeps happening And hasn't yet I have to see him. His eyes. He's hiding it. I know where the rest is. Skrillex has it. I'm dying, right? I have to be dying. You're dead. But I'm dying. I've been here before and I've felt it. Tokyo? High rise. Sounds Nice. Check the price on a flight. Likewise, I've tried to find this guy about a million times. I know where he hides it. So, how does it end? It just ends. yeah --but how does it end? It just...ended. You actually have to leave, to get out of here. NO… Don't do it. Don't do what? I didn't do anything. This is the way she wanted it. JUMP. Jump--now? Are you sure? This morning my mind was made up; I was going to Thailand for over a month. Sweet, and Rich-- But Flaky Like a pastry in the morning; Seems like a great treat but really, He's no good for me So we'll have a Mexican Wedding Damn. How did Dillon Francis get so high up??? Well, I found him hanging from a tree, so. OH FUCK, I GET IT-- HE IS GERALD. Damn. I don't know how to explain this… Oh shit, I get it; I'm Gerald. - — NEXT EPISODE: CESMET AND PETRUFHEIO are beyond overwhelm; GIAN stands before them, taking a respectful bow as he, too joins them in battlestance, which cannot be broken in physical stature, however the focused energy between the triad raises the entire colleaium into a total chaos and commotion. GIAN?! What is this? Who are you? GIAN, serious and stern, unusual to his demeanor, scoffs, as he focuses on C'esme't, acknowledging her presence in consciousness, and all respect. Petrutheio, face reddened, implodes with anger, nearly breaking his stance. Go ahead, Pet— That's Your Highness— —you can't win— —I already have— —He'll kill you. —he's already dead— Aren't we all? C'esme't, the only of the triad having actually experienced all forms of death, aoftens her gaze, entering into cosmic ompinpotence I'm having a hard time Getting started With this project Probably because I just want off this planet Cause it's lovelies; I'm honest with my thoughts, And now I'm lost in them I'm lost without you Lost another pair of socks, In the common laundry room I'm just an everyday, ordinary Motherfucking wannabe, a DJ But I wanna be a mother one day I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning Nothing's ever better Then the taste of butter; Dug you up to wonder what the fuck was up With all the rubber ducks Inside my cup, or tub I'm just a cuck I guess you really love her, huh I really love the one, I really love I really love My other husband— Huh I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning [SHOT] If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning [SHOT] Just a warning shot to shut you up, You little fucking slut Enough's enough Another lover, motherfucker Suck it up, you cunt You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us I dug you up to hug you, But all you are is just Some bones, dressed in new clothes I took your skull home And I put it on my mantle, Make a wish, —and then I blow the candle Out. Huh C'esme't has secretly turned to self-harm, in the midst of her ongoing emotional crisis due to Petruchio's arrogance and deliberate carelessness; she begins to fear for her Selfl, as she discovers during a match in her reflective state that she is recently unable to cry, hardened by her stubbornly aggressive counterpart, C'esme't draws the blood of her palm, which she spills onto the sundial in the labyrinth; she is startled and surprised shamefully by Gian, who, though normally calm becomes diffuse, and sent into a powerful fury of sadness and rage-- She reveals to Gian, in his onset of tears that she herself has been unable to cry, to which he deflates as she comforts him, holding his as he weeps glistening streams of ‘conscious tears, crying quite physically for the two of them, blood mixing with his tears as he grasps s cesmet's wounded palm, gripping it to his cheek; His intrinsic healing powers are revealed as his tears begin to mend the deep wound; Meanwhile, Petrutheio becomes irritated, as he is forced to continue pausing a Jester's Match, stricken with excruciating pain in his own palm; Attempting to ignore it, he continues forward with his match, but is irreversibly injured when s when his palm becomes again singed with pain and he is stricken by his opponent; He falls to the ground, clutching his palm, immediately knocked unconscious. He fades into a dream. PETRUTHEIO, YOU TELEPATHIC HACK! Oh, so you finally acknowledge my telepathy… In the highest realm, where The One is set to assume, interwoven intoThe Golden Goddess Of The Eye— Dark Heart Artist —the Eldest consciousness in any given existence; being that of everything of Love, and Light The middle realm, where the majority of a——- What the fuck. Wait, what happened? It just ENDS!!? It just ENDED. WHAT THE FUCK. AHHHAHHHHAHAHHHH. No, no, no– WHAT THE FUCK Wait! Go back! AHHHHHHHHH. [Holding eachother screaming] Oh, look. A butterfly. WHAT. There is is. Oh. See. huh. [a calm silence] Bro. huh . Wait. we're INSIDE. {holding eachotherscreaming] My heart is in another place, And with these words we face A face to face A fight of fights The faux of foes— And so, a duel it is For you, I fawned; For you, I called— The darkest night was followed by The lightest light That Dawn could bring, And I would sing this to you, too, My love— But have no melody A melodrama, Or a comedy? Come my lover, come to me My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me What was once, Is always— Don't you see? I see you, See you, see me What we were, We always are We always are We always, always Oh, what would you do to me? Oh, what will you do to me? Oh, what did you do to me? What have you done to me? Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me I did fall; We did fight— It is love; He had fawned for me once— Oh— Love is what it always was; What we were once, We all become Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me HI, I'm Gerald. Dude, I can't tell the story of Gerald. Only Dillon Francis can do that. I concur. That's right. Gerald is his friend-- --He's my friend-- I'm not go-- And that's it. It just ends. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.
{Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] Ugh, Die! Die! Die! - my mom (My mom actually said that.) SEASON 6 ACT III, PART VIII “The Lovers' Quarrel” The Lovers must practice an a traditional one-handed duel; They must fence whilst one arm is tied behind the back, a rope tightly held by each's own ascended master as they maneuver in the round. It is a practice of stealth, dynamic movement, and self control. Petruchio and C'esmet passionately dance in the round--the training period stands as a trial-and-error, The Ascended masters tugging at the ropes to correct their mistakes. C'esme't travels to a descended dimension to materialize her Ascended Mastery; Supacree Gains her powers not slowly, but all at once. Avicii explains how long one walks the astral void before returning home into the Kingdom of Heaven after departing. DILLON FRANCIS YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. CHAK CHEL I wasn't trying to get you killed! I was trying to get you laid! || D.J. YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. C.C. I WASNT TRYING TO GET YOU KILLED! I WAS TRYING TO GET YOU LAID. D.J. I can get laid by myself! C.C. D.J. Shut UP. The famed lovers take their place in the center of the arena; they humbly and gracefully take their battle stance, looking each other in the eye, one arm extended behind the back to face the sky, the other planted firmly, grounding them to earth. In quiet desperation, a silence falls over the entirety of the space—until, a glowing light distracts all but the two of the lovers, focused in oneness, acknowledging two qual parts of one whole. The crowd gasps and coos, as the glowing figure, masqueraded by shadows in a beam of light and colorful auras A tall figure stands equidistant to the two lovers; the triad is formed, and as he begins the yet Ū fort old ancient ritual, the lovers are overwhelmed with shock and confusion. blackout — END EPISODE Lost your shine? Lost my Skrillex! You miss it? Do I Miss—? … You know what? What. Fuck you, dude. ...no can do. [later] Are we relaxed? What is this? I need it. You fucked up. This isn't right. No, it isn't. — BLACKOUT, What happened here? Are we rolling? Cut to commercial. — Are you serious? I'm so serious!!! She's so serious. Cut to: Grocery Store, Day [over the store radio] She's a maniac, maniac on the floor!! What is she DOING? What are you doing? I'm doing me, bitch. And she's dancing like she never has before. —cut to rave— ***WUBZ*** Who is this? I'm on my own tonight. Is she drinking?!? THATS NOT FAIR! Oh, Sweet Jesus! —regular Jesus: [to sweet Jesus] aha! It's you this time. Sweet Jesus: fuck, no fair. THIS ISN'T SKRILLEX. Sweet Baby Jesus. Sweet Jesus: (relieved) YES. Regular Jesus: oh, you're saved. Nice. [ JESUS passes BABY JESUS to SWEET JESUS, then footballing the infant into the outer realms, dusting his hands off and flexing.] Send the Messiah. Wait, which one? Yeah, whose Messiah? Cut back to: the rave ...Who's baby is this? Woah, cool baby. I respect that. [the third raver simply lifts his diffraction glasses, astonished by the bedazzling baby Jesus's vibe.] Wait, Baby Jesus is bedazzled? MAYBE: Cut to: A flash of the alternate dimension, where indeed baby Jesus is Bedazzled.] Cut back to: No, his vibe. Is he sparkling? It's his aura. Oh. Pfft. Lol. Okay. —- First of all, I've never had this many black friends before. .. Oh, my God… I am alarmed. She's so stupid… Actually, just ugly—! Eyyy. Woahhh! But now I'm— You're a fan. Hey—I ate a fan for breakfast—okay?! Literally. OKAY. Ew, gross. Just kill me. [without hesitation] No—Ze Rulez. [Lowers Rave Weapon] __ I'm highly allergic— —Don't need Skrillex. Brought my own! — [stabs self] What is that? Oh shit, it's the EPI(c)PEN OH SHIT. Nice. It also writes. After the stab? Usually after, yes. You, have to. Oh, yeah, huh? No, you actually have to stab yourself first with it—or else it won't write. — Anyway—what were you trying to write? ...fuck, I forgot. Good job, Sonny. ___ Take me back! You wanted this. I wanted NOTHING. You got there! Agh!! Then when you did, you wanted to leave. There's no music. It's literally NOTHING. Except Jimmy Fallon. WHAT?! Since when?! What? Since literally ever. What?! No way. Let me see. Let me see. Oh my—WOAH. Let me see. Nothing is something! Unh-uh bro! What the— IT IS JIMMY FALLON. There's this cricket that lives Somewhere near here, When I hear him I think of the song He sings and all I think is “I wish someone would sing for me, I wish someone would sing for me” If he makes me cry one more time... “One last time, We gonna celebrate” If there's an album, there's going to be a tour; If there's a tour, I'm gonna wanna see him And it's just infinite, isn't it-- Infinite, isn't it? There's no point to it; There's really nowhere safe, that I could run from him A class act An a plus A sad actor with black magic A bad pastor with bad habits A black cat, and a hat and in it Is everything I ever imagined If there's an album, There's going to be a crowd I'm gonna want to be in it And it's just infinite isn't it Can't live with Skrillex Can't go on tour with him Maybe I just, Settle down in this awful town While I try to figure out, What this is about And if this is about Skrillex How did I get into it? If this is Skrillex How do ___ AHHHH DUDE. AHHH THIS ISN'T HAPPENING. Ahhhh man. What the fuck. This is--did you Put The Skrillex in The Skrillex, like I said? ...I… ...did you put the Skrillex in The Skrillex? Skrillex-Skrillex Put the-the Skrillex in the Skrillex Skrillex-t-Skrillex-Skrillex Skrillex is Skrillex-Skrillex OH SHIT. YOU DON'T REMEMBER WRITING ‘THE SKRILLEX SONG'? I DIDN'T WRITE IT! YOU WROTE IT. She's denying it. Oh, She stole all ya'll music. She took all of my songs. All of them? I mean, not all of them--just the bangers. I'm not going to Mexico for Dillon Francis. “The Interrogation” SUPACREE pays the incarcerated SKRILLEX under observation a series of visits, using her invisibility cloak. [[*This would be along the same storyline (using a linear “time”) where SUPACREE has gained most of her abilities, and is also terrorizing Dillon Francis (*interns scene). So. What? Just to get this straight; Nobody can see SUPACREE? Right. But she's--basically--beating the shit out of people. Yeah, she's just... fucking shit up. But nobody can see her. No. At all. No. Nobody at all, just the DJ's. Starting with-- D1-Skrillex D2-DIllon Francis D3-SUPACREE (Wait, how the fuck?) Scary Monsters and SUPACREE. Well, which comes first? What? Which movie? I--What? In order. Order? Like...wait, what are you saying? When you put them in order-- Order?? ORDER!!! Bruh. I just got a dick pic from Dillon Francis. What? By like, accident? I don't think it was an accident… It had to be... It has a personalized greeting, with my name in it. What? Let me see--! (Look) I mean--not “let me see”, I just meant--the greeting. Like, what did it say? Dude-- Damn, that's… Yeahhhh man! Was there a show tonight? Maaaayyybe, I don't know where it would be... Yo dude, I'm calling--WOAH. What dude? I got a message from him too! Oh shiiiit, what's it say? Should I even open it? Open it! What if it's his dick, bro? Open it! [Opens it.] OHHH. It's his dick, bro. Oh SHIT, what the fuck HAPPENED? What did happen? Does yours have a message? What did happen…? I feel like--wait, is that--huh. What does the message say? It does have a message...wait--let me see yours again. What the fuck for? [staring at phone, cocking head slowly to one side] ((Ohh, I like this, the audio pans like--)) I feel like mine's at a different angle. A different angle--wh--let me see. [shows phone] [cocks head to the side slowly, returning to his phone to compare the photos] Oh shit, that is at a different angle. With different lighting! Whatthefuuuck. Dude. _ Well, what did you do when you were Skrillex? A lot. _ Yo. That dude has like 16 passports. I had a lot of fun as Qua Long. _ Shenanigans As Dillon Francis-- Oh shit, this is gonna be a long list. It's actually not that much. (It's a lot) Dillon Francis sits at his desk in his Lair/Office. A pile of legal paperwork is stacked in front of him. ((Oh shit, where's the scene where he's got the glasses?)) Which...glasses… Aw fuck. Oh, right--cause he has a-- He has an entire series. How the fuck did Dillon Francis get to be Captain of the Motherfucking Bampheramphs?! FUCK that, he's not my captain. He's your captain. He is not my Captain. That is not my President. I'M THE CAPTAIN NOW! **Insert: This Is: Dillon Francis Here Damn dude. Dillon Francis needs an entire character analisis (Okay, keep that misspelling, that's hilarious. Anyway) *Analysis I think I might have to write one. Can we not? I mean. Yo dude, i”m like half capacity for Dillon Francis Half, is….half. Well, I mean it's corona virus so-- Fragments of Mr. Francis Blasted analysis Need a dialysis just to get this Sk- Shit out my system. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I shout out curses. Now I speak clown I'm an Owl out of water. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I create languages I see the stares On blank faces I paint the canvas With blood and with ashes I leave on the pavement First of all, These park and raves are crazy Electric Daisy is inside me Everybody's at the party All the stars aligning And all the patrons waiting, waving ___ I call him “The Ghost” You never know where he goes, And the music follows No forward But I know, I know He's The Ghost Producer And I'm just a Loser _ Ive never seen this one before! Me neither. That's great. Something new. Well-something old, something new--it's Skrillex. Yeah, but I like Skrillex. We all like Skrillex Wow. Oh, the fan..family. Family? Family, wait-- AGH, THIS MUSIC IS DISTRACTING ME. It was so clear, and then it just-- Yeah, Vanished? Yeah. Yeah. [A Silence.] A circle of dancing people summon wishes out of the center of their Concentrical Circle. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. What. I'm pretty sure this already happened. I remember that. What? That never happened Uh. It did. It happened like, last season-- --LAST SEASON? --maybe even the season before that. What! I thought we were watching the Pilot! I THOUGHT THIS WAS A MOVIE. This is the third movie. THE THIRD MOVIE? Wait--when did you get here? I...have always been here. [beat.] She's been going on like this for two days. Oh My God. Yes. Have you tried to stop her? No, it's too good; Plus, she can sense us coming it's--watch this. Queue the passerby. A passerby moves towards the garden in the far east corner of the observatory; Are you recording all of this? Even better; We're broadcasting it. To WHO? (in space, in what (was thought to be, anyway) a Void in the unknown. Uh, it WAS a void in the unknown, until a satellite crossed into it) What the fuck, is that a Satelite? A satellite! A satellite? Which satellite? I've got dozens of satellites. Dozens? *Thousands Elon Musk: ...Was it one of mine? (It was) ((To literally nobody's surprise)) (((Literally))) Literally, nobody--because literally nobody ever existed, ever. Until this happened. WHAT IS THIS? Have you seen this? No. Well, you're in it. Okay? I'm in a lot of shit. We all are. But not this. (yes you are) What was that? What was what? You need to burn this. Burn it… Nobody can ever see it. Okay. I just took 6 Xanex. 6! YES. And ⅓. And a third. Okay. Yes. 6 and ⅓. This, This. This is why. Why what? Why he looked at me like that. Like what? [A look.] But how could he have even known; Where could he have ever been, that I was that would make it make sense. Well, we know the Why. This is why. So now--How. How, now Brown Cow? Okay, honestly--it's almost funny now, because yeah--I'd probably also react that same way if I knew someone was going to write that about me. Yeah, I panicked. Panicked; I had a heart attack. Have you seen that thing? Yeah, it's massive. It is massive it's-- --God, it's ridiculous. --It's almost atrocious. Yikes. Yeah. I've been inside of this story before. Oh? I've been inside all of them. I see. Most of them, I just choose to forget. What makes it so that you choose? _ I actually stopped breathing. For how long? Forever. It was nice. _ You...made this…? I...yeah. You cooked me breakfast. I enjoy cooking. Well, thank you. Welcome. DEAD. How did-- Alright. So these two planets. Yeah. Two different galaxies? I guess. Okay. _ First of all that party was lit as fuck and you missed it. I didn't miss it, I just... attended at a limited distance. Chak Chel's set. Doooog. It was. (MM.) Bruh, I just miss when SNAILS was Captain. That was fun times. Too bad we can't go back. ...we can go back... No, dude don't-- Ted, Ted, and Ted meet Todd, Todd, and Todd at Lost In The Sauce Lands. So basically--all 6 of them fuck up at the same time and end up In this-- It's basically a void that lasts infinitely at Lost Lands. Oh shit. _ You better quit it, before you get Stuck in The Skrillex. [The Skrillex Tar Pits] _ Have you ever seen a mosh pit at-- -- Skril-- NO. I'm not ready to talk about it. --Dillon Francis-- It was really therapeutic. -it was nice, they had protective equipment -there was a line, and a queue -it was literally the safest moshpit I've ever attended. Meanwhile, at the Skrillex concert: I'M NOT READY. - Well, that was nuts. Please. No amount of marijuana is going to make you capable of understanding-- I'm not trying to understand, i'm trying to cope; okay? This nigga has magical powers. --And then what?-- Is she still on fire? (an explosion) Yes. Is she still on fire? (several explosions) Maybe. There were so many bombs. (((But the worst?))) “The Nigga Conniption” Oh, shit, is that what we're calling it? Where did he get it? He didn't “get it”, he just had it. How could he just “have it.” I had to do something; They were going to kill him. What happened to your “survival of the fittest” This is different. How is it different? This is different because he isn't sick, or defective--he's just...created… …? ...differently. So it's different. Woah. That's a lot of shit. It is a lot. What the fuck. I swear to GOD i've been in this WOBBLE for over a MINUTE NOW. Ahhhh, there you are-- Ah, The Wobbles. Here, we meet: -mr. wobble -the wobble monster and some other wobble people who live in the wobble. Bruh. I am so tired. What does this dude eat for breakfast? I guess we insert that scene with Dillon Francis here, right? (((Yup.)) So, to this festival… YESTIVAL. Oh shit, is that what we called it? YES. oh shit, because-- EVERYTHING IS YES. (Everything was yes.) ((It was.)) (((It still is.))) The Venga Bus. The Double Dutch Bus. Whatever that is. The Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile. That strange Double Decker from Harry Potter. T h e S o u l T r a i n Did it have a name? I don't know. I don't have time for the internet right now. Now they call me “the internet” Okay, wait-- Yeah. So. Next time I die, that's it--everything just stops. Yes. _ Eventually I'm gonna get sick of this shit and just sit But that's someday, And todays not it; It's lit About to hit TiTs and Hit the Highway, And I'm on the way Cause I was born to rage. DaDa Life. Ahhs, those were the days. The golden age of rave… FIRST OF ALL PASQUALE, THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS. (Overhead of EDC) YOU DID THIS. [that's a neutral] Is she yelling at him? I think she's more proud and impressed, but pissed at the same time, because he's just so nonchalant and calm about it. Oh please, that nigga is not calm. Face. Have you seen his eyes? They're wild. Wild, I tell you. OKay what the fuck is happening; Pasqualle's eating Twinkies right now. Dude, the world is ending. I don't think the world is “ending”, it's just...something's probably wrong with it or something. [[watching virtual rave]] oh yes, something is wrong with it definitely. What is actually happening right now. This shit just lifted us into space-- --this isn't it, is it?-- What, at the rave? You're still at that rave? You have reception in space?...Hello… Oh Hell No. My Phone cut off! I still have reception. Who do you have T Mobile (but later) Bruh, I just lost service. What? Oh no. Oh, what-- I still have service. What? When did you get here? Who the fuck are you? I've...always been here. What, no you haven't, I-- Shh. Here. What? How do you have service? What carrier is this? GOOGLE. I don't know--have you asked Google about it? No, fuck that, I don't want to talk to Google about it--she's just going to make me over analyse everything-- Maybe you should over-analyse it. No. Hey man, the word ‘analysis' is starting to look funny. Of course it looks funny, it starts with ‘anal' Who starts with ‘anal'? Touchy. Hooe shit, have you seen that bitch? She's scary. She's a bit scary. Did she say that? I believe it. I don't know if I believe it. BELIEVE IT. Wait, you're Naruto? In the flesh! WHY! Why am I Naruto? WHY ARE YOU IN THE FLESH?! How did you DO this? You did-did. I did not DO this; I couldn't DO this! You can do anything. But I didn't! But you can. You can do everything. You are everything. But i'm not. Alright. Then you're not. WHAT? If you honestly believe that--or whatever you honestly believe--then that's facts. Damn, she put you in a “Fuck You” Chamber. [*ding!* FUHCKYOU] What did you DO. Yo, what did you doooo. What did you do to this girl, oh my god dude; I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU. I HATE-- Oh now, dear; Hate is such a strong word. Ohh. It's a Skrillex. S K R I L L E X It is. Looks Fragile. Should we grab it? FIRST OF ALL, --Goddammit, dude-- “IT”, is a HE. Okay, DAMN. DAMN? OKAY. [she does.] Damn. Yeah. So that's what “Damn” is. Lol the first damnation. Hey-- Hi-- Okay, what if-- What if: THAT'S the name of your Supergroup? I wanted to call us “Trifecta” Here? yeah , right here. This is where you want your Kingdom? ...Yeah, right here. ...Okay... Okay. {A look} K bye. _ I've been at this rave for 57 days. _ Okay. Ya'll. Okay, ya'll! No. Guys. We gotta get out of here. What? Noooo. We're just getting started. No. Guys. I'm serious. Something is happening. “I see dead people” ...Freddy Mercury? Really. Uh huh. At a rave. Yes. In space. We did go to space, yes. Okay. Simpson? Yes. I'm gonna need you to take the day off. he's crazy He's not crazy, he's just gay! he's craaazy gay. _ Okay. But how do you know him? he's my ex. No he isn't. Who is it? (sighs) it's...my ex. WHAT? Check. Mate. Bitch. __ Mm. I know her. Who--Billie Ellish-- [Nods] What? Take me to her. Take you...to Billie Ellish. If that's what you're calling...her... now...yes. “now”? Mmhmm. Lady, how old are you--and what is this shit? Hm. (squints) try it. (sus) UH, no…? Suit yourself. It's there if you ever want it. (later) Dillon Francis is searching frantically for extra magic when-- [He comes across the flask, and snatches it.] WOW. Yeah, I know; it's crazy, right? You just found him like this? I did. Where was he? I tripped over him at a bus stop. Woah. Bro, that's so mean. Okay What did Dillon Francis do to you? He knows what he did. He does? No. (He actually does.) Oh, I knew it! ((You should know it, you wrote--)) THE END. ___ What is your favorite invention? Of mine? Yeah. Hmm…. (((Ganja.))) What's your favorite color? Hmmm… (((White))) “When The Day Met The Night” Has Brenden Urie been to the future? Probably. He seems... He seems off. (He is) We all are. (You are.) Hey--who's saying that? Let me be Frank. Dooooooog. it's that part! It's that part. Shuttup! Nigga this is it--this is the shit I told you! So...how many channels is this on? It's on millions of channels throughout the interdiemensions and counting. “Millions of channels throughout the interdimensions,” Not only are we Global; We are now Interplanetary, and our Communication Technology has connected us into the outer dimensions, and intersecting parallels. Are you guys done blowing eachother up yet? UH, WHAT? You're idiots; This was supposed to be a redemption for your entire species, and you fuckwads ruined...pretty much everything. Now we have to mellow out your entire civilization-- --yeah, or annihilate it-- ---just for you backwards savages to get lifted into the Ascension. Idiots. What was that? What was what? Did you hear something? Hear what? Ouch! Ow? What's wrong? Are you Okay?! *trigger, pulled* -------------------------------------------------------BOOM--------------------------------------------------------------- S/HE CAME THROUGH MY SUBWOOFER. She came in through the bathroom window. ___ No, no, no--let me be the DJ. You're already the DJ. Heh. I wanna be the DJ. What were you saying? I don't know. Something Something Sonny Something. So she took 6 Xanex, and #Adderall It was just a long day, that's all… And then I hear Skrillex is on his way HERE? Damn. No. I'm not okay. So, I... Damn dog, she lost it. She lost it. I ovet is. huh. Oh man, he was on one. I'm on one. Fuck it, I'm On One. Fuck. What happened? What happened? What happened? Well, that's tragic. Wait--this is a tragedy? No, it isn't--it's a comedy. No, it isn't-it has Sad Dillon Francis. Exactly. If it has sad Dillon Francis in it, it's tragic. It's supposed to be dramatic. Dillon Francis was crying in it? That's fantastic. That's hilarious. Sad Dillon Francis? I don't want to see sad Dillon Francis! He's a bad actor. Then i'll be sad. We're all sad. Oh, you're right--we're all sad. Oh. He is actually not a bad actor. He was really good in it. Oh, my God--it was really good. Are you serious? I'm not watching it. It's nominated for an Oscar. I'm not watching it. C'mon man --do you know how long it took to get my hands on this? They have them at Fantastik. Do you know what I had to do? It was not cool. Bro, it was so cool! So goood. He is, he's good. What has he done! This is bad. This is very bad. KLIPTOWN EMPYREAN, OH I GET IT, IT'S-- Sop. Okay? You're never gonna get it. ‘Nah, you're never gonna get it. Never ever gonna get it DUDE. WHAT? WRITE THE FUCKIN MOVIE. WHICH ONE? I DON'T KNOW--THE ONE THAT GETS US OUT OF HERE. How'd you learn how to do that? Do what? Does he know? No, he doesn't. He doesn't know. Oh. Oh, he doesn't know what he did? Nah, not yet. Wow. Have you seen this? [Looks] (Not Impressed) Now I have. What d you think-- I don't. That it's like, magic, or...what is that. I don't know what it is. Well...what do you think it is? I don't think, I just listen; and if anything sounds interesting, I just send it in. Interesting like this? [plays it] CUT TO: [stops it] This is interesting. They stare into The Box. I'm glad you did this in person. No one else can know about this; Not even our affiliates. Not even-- Nobody. Woah, it actually came back I told you, if it was a good idea, it would always come back. It...I guess. Besides, it's already happened. It's just playing over. “Do I Know you?” “Do you?” Damn. This shit gets deep. I don't get how it's deep. And I don't get how it's DIllon Francis. I can't even imagine how this happened. Imagine Dragons. That's--I'd rather--not. Anyway, why is she cooking this nigga breakfast? Because he's dead, he should have a nice breakfast. Yeah, you're probably right. BILLIE ELLISH I---like that scythe. SUPA CRYPT KEEPER It's nice, right? BILLIE ELLISH Yeah. I like it. SCK You like it? Have it. BILLIE ELLISH It's mine? SCK Yah! If you like it so much, just take it-- CUT TO DILLON FRANCIS DUDE, SHE TOOk ONE OF MY MAGNETS. CUT BACK TO BILLIE ELLISH Nice! Besides, I have another one just like it--but tiny. TINY SCYTHE. Have you seen this Billie Ellish kid? Oh wow. Yeah, she's kind of terrifying. BILLIE ELLISH is an Old Soul. (it's true, she actually is) A really, really old soul. Who is this. I like it. Are You Okay? Not really, but-- (Shrugs) That's it? That was the fast? Yup. But it was so short. Sometimes it is. But now what? What else do you want? I...don't know how to do this. Sure you do,you just do it. You don't know how you shine the sun, you just do it Just do it! JUST DO IT, NIKE. Is this your knife? I...yes. [they fight] Is this your knife? I... maybe... [they fight] Is this...your I-- [winces] CUT TO: Now, give me your hat. What, why?! GIVE ME YOUR HAT. Damn dude, Skrillex is kicking ass and taking names all day in this. What movie is this? *This is the dimension where pretty much, everything is Skrillex. Well, Everything is Skrillex. Is this the one with the Bellagio Fountain? I think it is. Nigga. He remixed it. He what? The Conniption. He remixed it. What? “The Conniption”; that's what people are calling it. Oh... Yeah. Bruh. Look at-- OH MY GOD. Bro..you leave the fandom, you leave the kingdom. What Kingdom? Dog, this isn't a Kingdom, it's just random. Bro, people LOVE IT. Now they want you to do a collab together. A collab with Skrillex? I can't afford a collab with Skrillex.. You have to do a collab with Skrillex! Uh, I don't have to do anything. Especially that. ___ You're getting residuals off my existence. I am your existence. SKRILLEX is a SUPERSTAR DJ. -&- SUPACREE is a SUPERSTAR DJ. WARNING: This combination is potentially hazardous. WARNING. ! ! ! X___X WARNING. __ ...is there something you need me to do? It's... hard to talk about it... Then don't, you don't have to speak, at all, you know. Oh what, he's telepathic? Homeotelepathy. What is that? BRO, WHAT IS YOUR POWER. Dude, I don't want to see Skrillex. That shit is terrifying. You're terrified of Skrillex? [Plays three clips] ...yeah, dude. Okay, so basically. Wow, he's a rocket scientist. How did you get to this Planet? What Planet. Oh, Goddamn him. Well, t-- Then we just LARPED. Wow that's... Oh, it got violent. Are you Finished with the Skrillex? Not yet. DUDE, DID YOU KNOW? NO! DID HE KNOW? NO! (((YES.))) AGH. I hate this place! Everything is YES. You're a fucking idiot. Oh yeah, you're a fucking Skrillex. How about that? Call me Skrillex again, you little bitch--just look me in the eye and say it. Skrillex. __ Hey, I know this magic… Magic, this is all magic. Yeah, I know this guy; This is Jimmy Fallon's magic. (Good job, bro.) Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. What the fuck I thought it was a planet. *Ahem. Jimmy Fallon's Magic Galaxy. Oh, wow. Alright, then. WHAT. Jimmy Fallon isn't a Bampheramph. Actually, he just made Captain. You're kidding. No, that was... that just happened. Jimmy Fallon. (Obviously) Come with--actually, you can stay right there. What? Just stand right there. ...and that's his magic. How does he have that? What did he ask for? What did you give him? What did he ask for? What did you give him?! Oh My God. You can't just go around granting wishes! I was just trying to manage these prayers, one-handedly. You can't just answer all the prayers as “wishes granted” that's why we have this system. Christ. No, not me--not today, Satan; I can't TAKE IT. JESUS CHRIST. Nah, he quit. What?! BUT. You got me now, so. Who the FUCK are you? I'm..uh... What are they calling me? They don't know it's you, they're still calling you Jesus. Well of course they still worship Jesus. Which Jesus? Well, any Jesus--All The Jesus. It was all the Jesus. All the Jesus. Magic Israel? A Ziptie machine? A “Stud Finder” IT WORKED. Of course it works. Well, no use crying over spilled Skrillex. But what do we do with it? Well, we're just going to have to get rid of it. Get rid of it? Fuck that! Didn't you say you wanted to *sissappear? Yes. Then get out of here. It is-- No, this isn't. This is his. No it isn't--it isn't Skrillex. What do you mean “It isn't Skrillex”? It's Skrillex. It isn't Skrillex. What are you talking about--it's-- I made this. What? No, it's. It's me. I did this. She's not mad at him, or anything In fact, She's just a fragment Or a figment or a magnet, that managed to stick In his imagination I hang out in this memory It's bad, But I keep going back-- I thought maybe I could manage it Keep it from happening But it just keeps happening And hasn't yet I have to see him. His eyes. He's hiding it. I know where the rest is. Skrillex has it. I'm dying, right? I have to be dying. You're dead. But I'm dying. I've been here before and I've felt it. Tokyo? High rise. Sounds Nice. Check the price on a flight. Likewise, I've tried to find this guy about a million times. I know where he hides it. So, how does it end? It just ends. yeah --but how does it end? It just...ended. You actually have to leave, to get out of here. NO… Don't do it. Don't do what? I didn't do anything. This is the way she wanted it. JUMP. Jump--now? Are you sure? This morning my mind was made up; I was going to Thailand for over a month. Sweet, and Rich-- But Flaky Like a pastry in the morning; Seems like a great treat but really, He's no good for me So we'll have a Mexican Wedding Damn. How did Dillon Francis get so high up??? Well, I found him hanging from a tree, so. OH FUCK, I GET IT-- HE IS GERALD. Damn. I don't know how to explain this… Oh shit, I get it; I'm Gerald. - — NEXT EPISODE: CESMET AND PETRUFHEIO are beyond overwhelm; GIAN stands before them, taking a respectful bow as he, too joins them in battlestance, which cannot be broken in physical stature, however the focused energy between the triad raises the entire colleaium into a total chaos and commotion. GIAN?! What is this? Who are you? GIAN, serious and stern, unusual to his demeanor, scoffs, as he focuses on C'esme't, acknowledging her presence in consciousness, and all respect. Petrutheio, face reddened, implodes with anger, nearly breaking his stance. Go ahead, Pet— That's Your Highness— —you can't win— —I already have— —He'll kill you. —he's already dead— Aren't we all? C'esme't, the only of the triad having actually experienced all forms of death, aoftens her gaze, entering into cosmic ompinpotence I'm having a hard time Getting started With this project Probably because I just want off this planet Cause it's lovelies; I'm honest with my thoughts, And now I'm lost in them I'm lost without you Lost another pair of socks, In the common laundry room I'm just an everyday, ordinary Motherfucking wannabe, a DJ But I wanna be a mother one day I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning Nothing's ever better Then the taste of butter; Dug you up to wonder what the fuck was up With all the rubber ducks Inside my cup, or tub I'm just a cuck I guess you really love her, huh I really love the one, I really love I really love My other husband— Huh I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning [SHOT] If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning [SHOT] Just a warning shot to shut you up, You little fucking slut Enough's enough Another lover, motherfucker Suck it up, you cunt You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us I dug you up to hug you, But all you are is just Some bones, dressed in new clothes I took your skull home And I put it on my mantle, Make a wish, —and then I blow the candle Out. Huh C'esme't has secretly turned to self-harm, in the midst of her ongoing emotional crisis due to Petruchio's arrogance and deliberate carelessness; she begins to fear for her Selfl, as she discovers during a match in her reflective state that she is recently unable to cry, hardened by her stubbornly aggressive counterpart, C'esme't draws the blood of her palm, which she spills onto the sundial in the labyrinth; she is startled and surprised shamefully by Gian, who, though normally calm becomes diffuse, and sent into a powerful fury of sadness and rage-- She reveals to Gian, in his onset of tears that she herself has been unable to cry, to which he deflates as she comforts him, holding his as he weeps glistening streams of ‘conscious tears, crying quite physically for the two of them, blood mixing with his tears as he grasps s cesmet's wounded palm, gripping it to his cheek; His intrinsic healing powers are revealed as his tears begin to mend the deep wound; Meanwhile, Petrutheio becomes irritated, as he is forced to continue pausing a Jester's Match, stricken with excruciating pain in his own palm; Attempting to ignore it, he continues forward with his match, but is irreversibly injured when s when his palm becomes again singed with pain and he is stricken by his opponent; He falls to the ground, clutching his palm, immediately knocked unconscious. He fades into a dream. PETRUTHEIO, YOU TELEPATHIC HACK! Oh, so you finally acknowledge my telepathy… In the highest realm, where The One is set to assume, interwoven intoThe Golden Goddess Of The Eye— Dark Heart Artist —the Eldest consciousness in any given existence; being that of everything of Love, and Light The middle realm, where the majority of a——- What the fuck. Wait, what happened? It just ENDS!!? It just ENDED. WHAT THE FUCK. AHHHAHHHHAHAHHHH. No, no, no– WHAT THE FUCK Wait! Go back! AHHHHHHHHH. [Holding eachother screaming] Oh, look. A butterfly. WHAT. There is is. Oh. See. huh. [a calm silence] Bro. huh . Wait. we're INSIDE. {holding eachotherscreaming] My heart is in another place, And with these words we face A face to face A fight of fights The faux of foes— And so, a duel it is For you, I fawned; For you, I called— The darkest night was followed by The lightest light That Dawn could bring, And I would sing this to you, too, My love— But have no melody A melodrama, Or a comedy? Come my lover, come to me My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me What was once, Is always— Don't you see? I see you, See you, see me What we were, We always are We always are We always, always Oh, what would you do to me? Oh, what will you do to me? Oh, what did you do to me? What have you done to me? Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me I did fall; We did fight— It is love; He had fawned for me once— Oh— Love is what it always was; What we were once, We all become Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me HI, I'm Gerald. Dude, I can't tell the story of Gerald. Only Dillon Francis can do that. I concur. That's right. Gerald is his friend-- --He's my friend-- I'm not go-- And that's it. It just ends. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.
{Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] Ugh, Die! Die! Die! - my mom (My mom actually said that.) SEASON 6 ACT III, PART VIII “The Lovers' Quarrel” The Lovers must practice an a traditional one-handed duel; They must fence whilst one arm is tied behind the back, a rope tightly held by each's own ascended master as they maneuver in the round. It is a practice of stealth, dynamic movement, and self control. Petruchio and C'esmet passionately dance in the round--the training period stands as a trial-and-error, The Ascended masters tugging at the ropes to correct their mistakes. C'esme't travels to a descended dimension to materialize her Ascended Mastery; Supacree Gains her powers not slowly, but all at once. Avicii explains how long one walks the astral void before returning home into the Kingdom of Heaven after departing. DILLON FRANCIS YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. CHAK CHEL I wasn't trying to get you killed! I was trying to get you laid! || D.J. YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME KILLED. C.C. I WASNT TRYING TO GET YOU KILLED! I WAS TRYING TO GET YOU LAID. D.J. I can get laid by myself! C.C. D.J. Shut UP. The famed lovers take their place in the center of the arena; they humbly and gracefully take their battle stance, looking each other in the eye, one arm extended behind the back to face the sky, the other planted firmly, grounding them to earth. In quiet desperation, a silence falls over the entirety of the space—until, a glowing light distracts all but the two of the lovers, focused in oneness, acknowledging two qual parts of one whole. The crowd gasps and coos, as the glowing figure, masqueraded by shadows in a beam of light and colorful auras A tall figure stands equidistant to the two lovers; the triad is formed, and as he begins the yet Ū fort old ancient ritual, the lovers are overwhelmed with shock and confusion. blackout — END EPISODE Lost your shine? Lost my Skrillex! You miss it? Do I Miss—? … You know what? What. Fuck you, dude. ...no can do. [later] Are we relaxed? What is this? I need it. You fucked up. This isn't right. No, it isn't. — BLACKOUT, What happened here? Are we rolling? Cut to commercial. — Are you serious? I'm so serious!!! She's so serious. Cut to: Grocery Store, Day [over the store radio] She's a maniac, maniac on the floor!! What is she DOING? What are you doing? I'm doing me, bitch. And she's dancing like she never has before. —cut to rave— ***WUBZ*** Who is this? I'm on my own tonight. Is she drinking?!? THATS NOT FAIR! Oh, Sweet Jesus! —regular Jesus: [to sweet Jesus] aha! It's you this time. Sweet Jesus: fuck, no fair. THIS ISN'T SKRILLEX. Sweet Baby Jesus. Sweet Jesus: (relieved) YES. Regular Jesus: oh, you're saved. Nice. [ JESUS passes BABY JESUS to SWEET JESUS, then footballing the infant into the outer realms, dusting his hands off and flexing.] Send the Messiah. Wait, which one? Yeah, whose Messiah? Cut back to: the rave ...Who's baby is this? Woah, cool baby. I respect that. [the third raver simply lifts his diffraction glasses, astonished by the bedazzling baby Jesus's vibe.] Wait, Baby Jesus is bedazzled? MAYBE: Cut to: A flash of the alternate dimension, where indeed baby Jesus is Bedazzled.] Cut back to: No, his vibe. Is he sparkling? It's his aura. Oh. Pfft. Lol. Okay. —- First of all, I've never had this many black friends before. .. Oh, my God… I am alarmed. She's so stupid… Actually, just ugly—! Eyyy. Woahhh! But now I'm— You're a fan. Hey—I ate a fan for breakfast—okay?! Literally. OKAY. Ew, gross. Just kill me. [without hesitation] No—Ze Rulez. [Lowers Rave Weapon] __ I'm highly allergic— —Don't need Skrillex. Brought my own! — [stabs self] What is that? Oh shit, it's the EPI(c)PEN OH SHIT. Nice. It also writes. After the stab? Usually after, yes. You, have to. Oh, yeah, huh? No, you actually have to stab yourself first with it—or else it won't write. — Anyway—what were you trying to write? ...fuck, I forgot. Good job, Sonny. ___ Take me back! You wanted this. I wanted NOTHING. You got there! Agh!! Then when you did, you wanted to leave. There's no music. It's literally NOTHING. Except Jimmy Fallon. WHAT?! Since when?! What? Since literally ever. What?! No way. Let me see. Let me see. Oh my—WOAH. Let me see. Nothing is something! Unh-uh bro! What the— IT IS JIMMY FALLON. There's this cricket that lives Somewhere near here, When I hear him I think of the song He sings and all I think is “I wish someone would sing for me, I wish someone would sing for me” If he makes me cry one more time... “One last time, We gonna celebrate” If there's an album, there's going to be a tour; If there's a tour, I'm gonna wanna see him And it's just infinite, isn't it-- Infinite, isn't it? There's no point to it; There's really nowhere safe, that I could run from him A class act An a plus A sad actor with black magic A bad pastor with bad habits A black cat, and a hat and in it Is everything I ever imagined If there's an album, There's going to be a crowd I'm gonna want to be in it And it's just infinite isn't it Can't live with Skrillex Can't go on tour with him Maybe I just, Settle down in this awful town While I try to figure out, What this is about And if this is about Skrillex How did I get into it? If this is Skrillex How do ___ AHHHH DUDE. AHHH THIS ISN'T HAPPENING. Ahhhh man. What the fuck. This is--did you Put The Skrillex in The Skrillex, like I said? ...I… ...did you put the Skrillex in The Skrillex? Skrillex-Skrillex Put the-the Skrillex in the Skrillex Skrillex-t-Skrillex-Skrillex Skrillex is Skrillex-Skrillex OH SHIT. YOU DON'T REMEMBER WRITING ‘THE SKRILLEX SONG'? I DIDN'T WRITE IT! YOU WROTE IT. She's denying it. Oh, She stole all ya'll music. She took all of my songs. All of them? I mean, not all of them--just the bangers. I'm not going to Mexico for Dillon Francis. “The Interrogation” SUPACREE pays the incarcerated SKRILLEX under observation a series of visits, using her invisibility cloak. [[*This would be along the same storyline (using a linear “time”) where SUPACREE has gained most of her abilities, and is also terrorizing Dillon Francis (*interns scene). So. What? Just to get this straight; Nobody can see SUPACREE? Right. But she's--basically--beating the shit out of people. Yeah, she's just... fucking shit up. But nobody can see her. No. At all. No. Nobody at all, just the DJ's. Starting with-- D1-Skrillex D2-DIllon Francis D3-SUPACREE (Wait, how the fuck?) Scary Monsters and SUPACREE. Well, which comes first? What? Which movie? I--What? In order. Order? Like...wait, what are you saying? When you put them in order-- Order?? ORDER!!! Bruh. I just got a dick pic from Dillon Francis. What? By like, accident? I don't think it was an accident… It had to be... It has a personalized greeting, with my name in it. What? Let me see--! (Look) I mean--not “let me see”, I just meant--the greeting. Like, what did it say? Dude-- Damn, that's… Yeahhhh man! Was there a show tonight? Maaaayyybe, I don't know where it would be... Yo dude, I'm calling--WOAH. What dude? I got a message from him too! Oh shiiiit, what's it say? Should I even open it? Open it! What if it's his dick, bro? Open it! [Opens it.] OHHH. It's his dick, bro. Oh SHIT, what the fuck HAPPENED? What did happen? Does yours have a message? What did happen…? I feel like--wait, is that--huh. What does the message say? It does have a message...wait--let me see yours again. What the fuck for? [staring at phone, cocking head slowly to one side] ((Ohh, I like this, the audio pans like--)) I feel like mine's at a different angle. A different angle--wh--let me see. [shows phone] [cocks head to the side slowly, returning to his phone to compare the photos] Oh shit, that is at a different angle. With different lighting! Whatthefuuuck. Dude. _ Well, what did you do when you were Skrillex? A lot. _ Yo. That dude has like 16 passports. I had a lot of fun as Qua Long. _ Shenanigans As Dillon Francis-- Oh shit, this is gonna be a long list. It's actually not that much. (It's a lot) Dillon Francis sits at his desk in his Lair/Office. A pile of legal paperwork is stacked in front of him. ((Oh shit, where's the scene where he's got the glasses?)) Which...glasses… Aw fuck. Oh, right--cause he has a-- He has an entire series. How the fuck did Dillon Francis get to be Captain of the Motherfucking Bampheramphs?! FUCK that, he's not my captain. He's your captain. He is not my Captain. That is not my President. I'M THE CAPTAIN NOW! **Insert: This Is: Dillon Francis Here Damn dude. Dillon Francis needs an entire character analisis (Okay, keep that misspelling, that's hilarious. Anyway) *Analysis I think I might have to write one. Can we not? I mean. Yo dude, i”m like half capacity for Dillon Francis Half, is….half. Well, I mean it's corona virus so-- Fragments of Mr. Francis Blasted analysis Need a dialysis just to get this Sk- Shit out my system. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I shout out curses. Now I speak clown I'm an Owl out of water. Now I speak Sk-Sk-Sk I create languages I see the stares On blank faces I paint the canvas With blood and with ashes I leave on the pavement First of all, These park and raves are crazy Electric Daisy is inside me Everybody's at the party All the stars aligning And all the patrons waiting, waving ___ I call him “The Ghost” You never know where he goes, And the music follows No forward But I know, I know He's The Ghost Producer And I'm just a Loser _ Ive never seen this one before! Me neither. That's great. Something new. Well-something old, something new--it's Skrillex. Yeah, but I like Skrillex. We all like Skrillex Wow. Oh, the fan..family. Family? Family, wait-- AGH, THIS MUSIC IS DISTRACTING ME. It was so clear, and then it just-- Yeah, Vanished? Yeah. Yeah. [A Silence.] A circle of dancing people summon wishes out of the center of their Concentrical Circle. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. What. I'm pretty sure this already happened. I remember that. What? That never happened Uh. It did. It happened like, last season-- --LAST SEASON? --maybe even the season before that. What! I thought we were watching the Pilot! I THOUGHT THIS WAS A MOVIE. This is the third movie. THE THIRD MOVIE? Wait--when did you get here? I...have always been here. [beat.] She's been going on like this for two days. Oh My God. Yes. Have you tried to stop her? No, it's too good; Plus, she can sense us coming it's--watch this. Queue the passerby. A passerby moves towards the garden in the far east corner of the observatory; Are you recording all of this? Even better; We're broadcasting it. To WHO? (in space, in what (was thought to be, anyway) a Void in the unknown. Uh, it WAS a void in the unknown, until a satellite crossed into it) What the fuck, is that a Satelite? A satellite! A satellite? Which satellite? I've got dozens of satellites. Dozens? *Thousands Elon Musk: ...Was it one of mine? (It was) ((To literally nobody's surprise)) (((Literally))) Literally, nobody--because literally nobody ever existed, ever. Until this happened. WHAT IS THIS? Have you seen this? No. Well, you're in it. Okay? I'm in a lot of shit. We all are. But not this. (yes you are) What was that? What was what? You need to burn this. Burn it… Nobody can ever see it. Okay. I just took 6 Xanex. 6! YES. And ⅓. And a third. Okay. Yes. 6 and ⅓. This, This. This is why. Why what? Why he looked at me like that. Like what? [A look.] But how could he have even known; Where could he have ever been, that I was that would make it make sense. Well, we know the Why. This is why. So now--How. How, now Brown Cow? Okay, honestly--it's almost funny now, because yeah--I'd probably also react that same way if I knew someone was going to write that about me. Yeah, I panicked. Panicked; I had a heart attack. Have you seen that thing? Yeah, it's massive. It is massive it's-- --God, it's ridiculous. --It's almost atrocious. Yikes. Yeah. I've been inside of this story before. Oh? I've been inside all of them. I see. Most of them, I just choose to forget. What makes it so that you choose? _ I actually stopped breathing. For how long? Forever. It was nice. _ You...made this…? I...yeah. You cooked me breakfast. I enjoy cooking. Well, thank you. Welcome. DEAD. How did-- Alright. So these two planets. Yeah. Two different galaxies? I guess. Okay. _ First of all that party was lit as fuck and you missed it. I didn't miss it, I just... attended at a limited distance. Chak Chel's set. Doooog. It was. (MM.) Bruh, I just miss when SNAILS was Captain. That was fun times. Too bad we can't go back. ...we can go back... No, dude don't-- Ted, Ted, and Ted meet Todd, Todd, and Todd at Lost In The Sauce Lands. So basically--all 6 of them fuck up at the same time and end up In this-- It's basically a void that lasts infinitely at Lost Lands. Oh shit. _ You better quit it, before you get Stuck in The Skrillex. [The Skrillex Tar Pits] _ Have you ever seen a mosh pit at-- -- Skril-- NO. I'm not ready to talk about it. --Dillon Francis-- It was really therapeutic. -it was nice, they had protective equipment -there was a line, and a queue -it was literally the safest moshpit I've ever attended. Meanwhile, at the Skrillex concert: I'M NOT READY. - Well, that was nuts. Please. No amount of marijuana is going to make you capable of understanding-- I'm not trying to understand, i'm trying to cope; okay? This nigga has magical powers. --And then what?-- Is she still on fire? (an explosion) Yes. Is she still on fire? (several explosions) Maybe. There were so many bombs. (((But the worst?))) “The Nigga Conniption” Oh, shit, is that what we're calling it? Where did he get it? He didn't “get it”, he just had it. How could he just “have it.” I had to do something; They were going to kill him. What happened to your “survival of the fittest” This is different. How is it different? This is different because he isn't sick, or defective--he's just...created… …? ...differently. So it's different. Woah. That's a lot of shit. It is a lot. What the fuck. I swear to GOD i've been in this WOBBLE for over a MINUTE NOW. Ahhhh, there you are-- Ah, The Wobbles. Here, we meet: -mr. wobble -the wobble monster and some other wobble people who live in the wobble. Bruh. I am so tired. What does this dude eat for breakfast? I guess we insert that scene with Dillon Francis here, right? (((Yup.)) So, to this festival… YESTIVAL. Oh shit, is that what we called it? YES. oh shit, because-- EVERYTHING IS YES. (Everything was yes.) ((It was.)) (((It still is.))) The Venga Bus. The Double Dutch Bus. Whatever that is. The Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile. That strange Double Decker from Harry Potter. T h e S o u l T r a i n Did it have a name? I don't know. I don't have time for the internet right now. Now they call me “the internet” Okay, wait-- Yeah. So. Next time I die, that's it--everything just stops. Yes. _ Eventually I'm gonna get sick of this shit and just sit But that's someday, And todays not it; It's lit About to hit TiTs and Hit the Highway, And I'm on the way Cause I was born to rage. DaDa Life. Ahhs, those were the days. The golden age of rave… FIRST OF ALL PASQUALE, THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS. (Overhead of EDC) YOU DID THIS. [that's a neutral] Is she yelling at him? I think she's more proud and impressed, but pissed at the same time, because he's just so nonchalant and calm about it. Oh please, that nigga is not calm. Face. Have you seen his eyes? They're wild. Wild, I tell you. OKay what the fuck is happening; Pasqualle's eating Twinkies right now. Dude, the world is ending. I don't think the world is “ending”, it's just...something's probably wrong with it or something. [[watching virtual rave]] oh yes, something is wrong with it definitely. What is actually happening right now. This shit just lifted us into space-- --this isn't it, is it?-- What, at the rave? You're still at that rave? You have reception in space?...Hello… Oh Hell No. My Phone cut off! I still have reception. Who do you have T Mobile (but later) Bruh, I just lost service. What? Oh no. Oh, what-- I still have service. What? When did you get here? Who the fuck are you? I've...always been here. What, no you haven't, I-- Shh. Here. What? How do you have service? What carrier is this? GOOGLE. I don't know--have you asked Google about it? No, fuck that, I don't want to talk to Google about it--she's just going to make me over analyse everything-- Maybe you should over-analyse it. No. Hey man, the word ‘analysis' is starting to look funny. Of course it looks funny, it starts with ‘anal' Who starts with ‘anal'? Touchy. Hooe shit, have you seen that bitch? She's scary. She's a bit scary. Did she say that? I believe it. I don't know if I believe it. BELIEVE IT. Wait, you're Naruto? In the flesh! WHY! Why am I Naruto? WHY ARE YOU IN THE FLESH?! How did you DO this? You did-did. I did not DO this; I couldn't DO this! You can do anything. But I didn't! But you can. You can do everything. You are everything. But i'm not. Alright. Then you're not. WHAT? If you honestly believe that--or whatever you honestly believe--then that's facts. Damn, she put you in a “Fuck You” Chamber. [*ding!* FUHCKYOU] What did you DO. Yo, what did you doooo. What did you do to this girl, oh my god dude; I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU. I HATE-- Oh now, dear; Hate is such a strong word. Ohh. It's a Skrillex. S K R I L L E X It is. Looks Fragile. Should we grab it? FIRST OF ALL, --Goddammit, dude-- “IT”, is a HE. Okay, DAMN. DAMN? OKAY. [she does.] Damn. Yeah. So that's what “Damn” is. Lol the first damnation. Hey-- Hi-- Okay, what if-- What if: THAT'S the name of your Supergroup? I wanted to call us “Trifecta” Here? yeah , right here. This is where you want your Kingdom? ...Yeah, right here. ...Okay... Okay. {A look} K bye. _ I've been at this rave for 57 days. _ Okay. Ya'll. Okay, ya'll! No. Guys. We gotta get out of here. What? Noooo. We're just getting started. No. Guys. I'm serious. Something is happening. “I see dead people” ...Freddy Mercury? Really. Uh huh. At a rave. Yes. In space. We did go to space, yes. Okay. Simpson? Yes. I'm gonna need you to take the day off. he's crazy He's not crazy, he's just gay! he's craaazy gay. _ Okay. But how do you know him? he's my ex. No he isn't. Who is it? (sighs) it's...my ex. WHAT? Check. Mate. Bitch. __ Mm. I know her. Who--Billie Ellish-- [Nods] What? Take me to her. Take you...to Billie Ellish. If that's what you're calling...her... now...yes. “now”? Mmhmm. Lady, how old are you--and what is this shit? Hm. (squints) try it. (sus) UH, no…? Suit yourself. It's there if you ever want it. (later) Dillon Francis is searching frantically for extra magic when-- [He comes across the flask, and snatches it.] WOW. Yeah, I know; it's crazy, right? You just found him like this? I did. Where was he? I tripped over him at a bus stop. Woah. Bro, that's so mean. Okay What did Dillon Francis do to you? He knows what he did. He does? No. (He actually does.) Oh, I knew it! ((You should know it, you wrote--)) THE END. ___ What is your favorite invention? Of mine? Yeah. Hmm…. (((Ganja.))) What's your favorite color? Hmmm… (((White))) “When The Day Met The Night” Has Brenden Urie been to the future? Probably. He seems... He seems off. (He is) We all are. (You are.) Hey--who's saying that? Let me be Frank. Dooooooog. it's that part! It's that part. Shuttup! Nigga this is it--this is the shit I told you! So...how many channels is this on? It's on millions of channels throughout the interdiemensions and counting. “Millions of channels throughout the interdimensions,” Not only are we Global; We are now Interplanetary, and our Communication Technology has connected us into the outer dimensions, and intersecting parallels. Are you guys done blowing eachother up yet? UH, WHAT? You're idiots; This was supposed to be a redemption for your entire species, and you fuckwads ruined...pretty much everything. Now we have to mellow out your entire civilization-- --yeah, or annihilate it-- ---just for you backwards savages to get lifted into the Ascension. Idiots. What was that? What was what? Did you hear something? Hear what? Ouch! Ow? What's wrong? Are you Okay?! *trigger, pulled* -------------------------------------------------------BOOM--------------------------------------------------------------- S/HE CAME THROUGH MY SUBWOOFER. She came in through the bathroom window. ___ No, no, no--let me be the DJ. You're already the DJ. Heh. I wanna be the DJ. What were you saying? I don't know. Something Something Sonny Something. So she took 6 Xanex, and #Adderall It was just a long day, that's all… And then I hear Skrillex is on his way HERE? Damn. No. I'm not okay. So, I... Damn dog, she lost it. She lost it. I ovet is. huh. Oh man, he was on one. I'm on one. Fuck it, I'm On One. Fuck. What happened? What happened? What happened? Well, that's tragic. Wait--this is a tragedy? No, it isn't--it's a comedy. No, it isn't-it has Sad Dillon Francis. Exactly. If it has sad Dillon Francis in it, it's tragic. It's supposed to be dramatic. Dillon Francis was crying in it? That's fantastic. That's hilarious. Sad Dillon Francis? I don't want to see sad Dillon Francis! He's a bad actor. Then i'll be sad. We're all sad. Oh, you're right--we're all sad. Oh. He is actually not a bad actor. He was really good in it. Oh, my God--it was really good. Are you serious? I'm not watching it. It's nominated for an Oscar. I'm not watching it. C'mon man --do you know how long it took to get my hands on this? They have them at Fantastik. Do you know what I had to do? It was not cool. Bro, it was so cool! So goood. He is, he's good. What has he done! This is bad. This is very bad. KLIPTOWN EMPYREAN, OH I GET IT, IT'S-- Sop. Okay? You're never gonna get it. ‘Nah, you're never gonna get it. Never ever gonna get it DUDE. WHAT? WRITE THE FUCKIN MOVIE. WHICH ONE? I DON'T KNOW--THE ONE THAT GETS US OUT OF HERE. How'd you learn how to do that? Do what? Does he know? No, he doesn't. He doesn't know. Oh. Oh, he doesn't know what he did? Nah, not yet. Wow. Have you seen this? [Looks] (Not Impressed) Now I have. What d you think-- I don't. That it's like, magic, or...what is that. I don't know what it is. Well...what do you think it is? I don't think, I just listen; and if anything sounds interesting, I just send it in. Interesting like this? [plays it] CUT TO: [stops it] This is interesting. They stare into The Box. I'm glad you did this in person. No one else can know about this; Not even our affiliates. Not even-- Nobody. Woah, it actually came back I told you, if it was a good idea, it would always come back. It...I guess. Besides, it's already happened. It's just playing over. “Do I Know you?” “Do you?” Damn. This shit gets deep. I don't get how it's deep. And I don't get how it's DIllon Francis. I can't even imagine how this happened. Imagine Dragons. That's--I'd rather--not. Anyway, why is she cooking this nigga breakfast? Because he's dead, he should have a nice breakfast. Yeah, you're probably right. BILLIE ELLISH I---like that scythe. SUPA CRYPT KEEPER It's nice, right? BILLIE ELLISH Yeah. I like it. SCK You like it? Have it. BILLIE ELLISH It's mine? SCK Yah! If you like it so much, just take it-- CUT TO DILLON FRANCIS DUDE, SHE TOOk ONE OF MY MAGNETS. CUT BACK TO BILLIE ELLISH Nice! Besides, I have another one just like it--but tiny. TINY SCYTHE. Have you seen this Billie Ellish kid? Oh wow. Yeah, she's kind of terrifying. BILLIE ELLISH is an Old Soul. (it's true, she actually is) A really, really old soul. Who is this. I like it. Are You Okay? Not really, but-- (Shrugs) That's it? That was the fast? Yup. But it was so short. Sometimes it is. But now what? What else do you want? I...don't know how to do this. Sure you do,you just do it. You don't know how you shine the sun, you just do it Just do it! JUST DO IT, NIKE. Is this your knife? I...yes. [they fight] Is this your knife? I... maybe... [they fight] Is this...your I-- [winces] CUT TO: Now, give me your hat. What, why?! GIVE ME YOUR HAT. Damn dude, Skrillex is kicking ass and taking names all day in this. What movie is this? *This is the dimension where pretty much, everything is Skrillex. Well, Everything is Skrillex. Is this the one with the Bellagio Fountain? I think it is. Nigga. He remixed it. He what? The Conniption. He remixed it. What? “The Conniption”; that's what people are calling it. Oh... Yeah. Bruh. Look at-- OH MY GOD. Bro..you leave the fandom, you leave the kingdom. What Kingdom? Dog, this isn't a Kingdom, it's just random. Bro, people LOVE IT. Now they want you to do a collab together. A collab with Skrillex? I can't afford a collab with Skrillex.. You have to do a collab with Skrillex! Uh, I don't have to do anything. Especially that. ___ You're getting residuals off my existence. I am your existence. SKRILLEX is a SUPERSTAR DJ. -&- SUPACREE is a SUPERSTAR DJ. WARNING: This combination is potentially hazardous. WARNING. ! ! ! X___X WARNING. __ ...is there something you need me to do? It's... hard to talk about it... Then don't, you don't have to speak, at all, you know. Oh what, he's telepathic? Homeotelepathy. What is that? BRO, WHAT IS YOUR POWER. Dude, I don't want to see Skrillex. That shit is terrifying. You're terrified of Skrillex? [Plays three clips] ...yeah, dude. Okay, so basically. Wow, he's a rocket scientist. How did you get to this Planet? What Planet. Oh, Goddamn him. Well, t-- Then we just LARPED. Wow that's... Oh, it got violent. Are you Finished with the Skrillex? Not yet. DUDE, DID YOU KNOW? NO! DID HE KNOW? NO! (((YES.))) AGH. I hate this place! Everything is YES. You're a fucking idiot. Oh yeah, you're a fucking Skrillex. How about that? Call me Skrillex again, you little bitch--just look me in the eye and say it. Skrillex. __ Hey, I know this magic… Magic, this is all magic. Yeah, I know this guy; This is Jimmy Fallon's magic. (Good job, bro.) Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. What the fuck I thought it was a planet. *Ahem. Jimmy Fallon's Magic Galaxy. Oh, wow. Alright, then. WHAT. Jimmy Fallon isn't a Bampheramph. Actually, he just made Captain. You're kidding. No, that was... that just happened. Jimmy Fallon. (Obviously) Come with--actually, you can stay right there. What? Just stand right there. ...and that's his magic. How does he have that? What did he ask for? What did you give him? What did he ask for? What did you give him?! Oh My God. You can't just go around granting wishes! I was just trying to manage these prayers, one-handedly. You can't just answer all the prayers as “wishes granted” that's why we have this system. Christ. No, not me--not today, Satan; I can't TAKE IT. JESUS CHRIST. Nah, he quit. What?! BUT. You got me now, so. Who the FUCK are you? I'm..uh... What are they calling me? They don't know it's you, they're still calling you Jesus. Well of course they still worship Jesus. Which Jesus? Well, any Jesus--All The Jesus. It was all the Jesus. All the Jesus. Magic Israel? A Ziptie machine? A “Stud Finder” IT WORKED. Of course it works. Well, no use crying over spilled Skrillex. But what do we do with it? Well, we're just going to have to get rid of it. Get rid of it? Fuck that! Didn't you say you wanted to *sissappear? Yes. Then get out of here. It is-- No, this isn't. This is his. No it isn't--it isn't Skrillex. What do you mean “It isn't Skrillex”? It's Skrillex. It isn't Skrillex. What are you talking about--it's-- I made this. What? No, it's. It's me. I did this. She's not mad at him, or anything In fact, She's just a fragment Or a figment or a magnet, that managed to stick In his imagination I hang out in this memory It's bad, But I keep going back-- I thought maybe I could manage it Keep it from happening But it just keeps happening And hasn't yet I have to see him. His eyes. He's hiding it. I know where the rest is. Skrillex has it. I'm dying, right? I have to be dying. You're dead. But I'm dying. I've been here before and I've felt it. Tokyo? High rise. Sounds Nice. Check the price on a flight. Likewise, I've tried to find this guy about a million times. I know where he hides it. So, how does it end? It just ends. yeah --but how does it end? It just...ended. You actually have to leave, to get out of here. NO… Don't do it. Don't do what? I didn't do anything. This is the way she wanted it. JUMP. Jump--now? Are you sure? This morning my mind was made up; I was going to Thailand for over a month. Sweet, and Rich-- But Flaky Like a pastry in the morning; Seems like a great treat but really, He's no good for me So we'll have a Mexican Wedding Damn. How did Dillon Francis get so high up??? Well, I found him hanging from a tree, so. OH FUCK, I GET IT-- HE IS GERALD. Damn. I don't know how to explain this… Oh shit, I get it; I'm Gerald. - — NEXT EPISODE: CESMET AND PETRUFHEIO are beyond overwhelm; GIAN stands before them, taking a respectful bow as he, too joins them in battlestance, which cannot be broken in physical stature, however the focused energy between the triad raises the entire colleaium into a total chaos and commotion. GIAN?! What is this? Who are you? GIAN, serious and stern, unusual to his demeanor, scoffs, as he focuses on C'esme't, acknowledging her presence in consciousness, and all respect. Petrutheio, face reddened, implodes with anger, nearly breaking his stance. Go ahead, Pet— That's Your Highness— —you can't win— —I already have— —He'll kill you. —he's already dead— Aren't we all? C'esme't, the only of the triad having actually experienced all forms of death, aoftens her gaze, entering into cosmic ompinpotence I'm having a hard time Getting started With this project Probably because I just want off this planet Cause it's lovelies; I'm honest with my thoughts, And now I'm lost in them I'm lost without you Lost another pair of socks, In the common laundry room I'm just an everyday, ordinary Motherfucking wannabe, a DJ But I wanna be a mother one day I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning Nothing's ever better Then the taste of butter; Dug you up to wonder what the fuck was up With all the rubber ducks Inside my cup, or tub I'm just a cuck I guess you really love her, huh I really love the one, I really love I really love My other husband— Huh I'm at the apex I'm a warning call, A warning call A warning [SHOT] If I kill myself again, I'm waking up next to my lover So good morning, So good morning Just a warning [SHOT] Just a warning shot to shut you up, You little fucking slut Enough's enough Another lover, motherfucker Suck it up, you cunt You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us You're just another one You're just another one of us You're just another Just another one of us I dug you up to hug you, But all you are is just Some bones, dressed in new clothes I took your skull home And I put it on my mantle, Make a wish, —and then I blow the candle Out. Huh C'esme't has secretly turned to self-harm, in the midst of her ongoing emotional crisis due to Petruchio's arrogance and deliberate carelessness; she begins to fear for her Selfl, as she discovers during a match in her reflective state that she is recently unable to cry, hardened by her stubbornly aggressive counterpart, C'esme't draws the blood of her palm, which she spills onto the sundial in the labyrinth; she is startled and surprised shamefully by Gian, who, though normally calm becomes diffuse, and sent into a powerful fury of sadness and rage-- She reveals to Gian, in his onset of tears that she herself has been unable to cry, to which he deflates as she comforts him, holding his as he weeps glistening streams of ‘conscious tears, crying quite physically for the two of them, blood mixing with his tears as he grasps s cesmet's wounded palm, gripping it to his cheek; His intrinsic healing powers are revealed as his tears begin to mend the deep wound; Meanwhile, Petrutheio becomes irritated, as he is forced to continue pausing a Jester's Match, stricken with excruciating pain in his own palm; Attempting to ignore it, he continues forward with his match, but is irreversibly injured when s when his palm becomes again singed with pain and he is stricken by his opponent; He falls to the ground, clutching his palm, immediately knocked unconscious. He fades into a dream. PETRUTHEIO, YOU TELEPATHIC HACK! Oh, so you finally acknowledge my telepathy… In the highest realm, where The One is set to assume, interwoven intoThe Golden Goddess Of The Eye— Dark Heart Artist —the Eldest consciousness in any given existence; being that of everything of Love, and Light The middle realm, where the majority of a——- What the fuck. Wait, what happened? It just ENDS!!? It just ENDED. WHAT THE FUCK. AHHHAHHHHAHAHHHH. No, no, no– WHAT THE FUCK Wait! Go back! AHHHHHHHHH. [Holding eachother screaming] Oh, look. A butterfly. WHAT. There is is. Oh. See. huh. [a calm silence] Bro. huh . Wait. we're INSIDE. {holding eachotherscreaming] My heart is in another place, And with these words we face A face to face A fight of fights The faux of foes— And so, a duel it is For you, I fawned; For you, I called— The darkest night was followed by The lightest light That Dawn could bring, And I would sing this to you, too, My love— But have no melody A melodrama, Or a comedy? Come my lover, come to me My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me What was once, Is always— Don't you see? I see you, See you, see me What we were, We always are We always are We always, always Oh, what would you do to me? Oh, what will you do to me? Oh, what did you do to me? What have you done to me? Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me I did fall; We did fight— It is love; He had fawned for me once— Oh— Love is what it always was; What we were once, We all become Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover Come to me, my lover My lover, come to me Come to me, my lover, Come ro me— Come, my lover, Come to me— Come to me, my lover Come to me Come to me HI, I'm Gerald. Dude, I can't tell the story of Gerald. Only Dillon Francis can do that. I concur. That's right. Gerald is his friend-- --He's my friend-- I'm not go-- And that's it. It just ends. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 702, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Try "Star" 1: Overly awed and fascinated in the presence of celebrities. starstruck. 2: Structure from which the 3-year-olds fly forward at Churchill Downs. starting gate. 3: Banner carried by the attackers during Pickett's Charge. "Stars and Bars". 4: An asteroidean echinoderm found in tidepools. starfish. 5: It's composed mainly of amylose and amylopectin. starch. Round 2. Category: Smooching In Shakespeare 1: He claims that the sleeping Michael Cassio kissed him hard while dreaming of Desdemona. Iago. 2: He says, "Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft" while holding Yorick's skull. Hamlet. 3: "Love's Labour's Lost" and "Henry VI, Part III" both mention the kiss of this Biblical traitor. Judas Iscariot. 4: In this comedy Petruchio says, "Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday". Taming of the Shrew. 5: "We have kiss'd away kingdoms and provinces" says Scarus in the play about this title couple. Antony and Cleopatra. Round 3. Category: Tubes 1: Submarines have fixed tubes in the bow to shoot these underwater weapons. torpedoes. 2: If a surfer rides the tube in London, he's on this. the subway. 3: Every little breeze seems to whisper the name of this first test tube baby. Louise (Brown). 4: The gas-filled Geissler tube of the late 1850s was adapted for use in these advertising signs. neon signs. 5: Like you, a frog has this tube connecting the middle ear and the throat. the Eustachian tube. Round 4. Category: Famous Franks 1: This "Wizard of Oz" author edited a trade magazine for store window decorators. L. Frank Baum. 2: Frank Fitzsimmons took control of this union when Jimmy Hoffa was imprisoned in 1967. Teamsters. 3: This musical satirist founded the Mothers of Invention in 1964. Frank Zappa. 4: In Gemini 7 he and Jim Lovell set a 14-day endurance record. Frank Borman. 5: This Idaho Democratic senator was active in investigating abuses by the CIA. Frank Church. Round 5. Category: Directors On Film 1: He not only was "The Outlaw Josey Wales", he was the director, too. Clint Eastwood. 2: When you watch his direction of himself and Jack Nicholson, he hopes you "Hoffa" good time. Danny DeVito. 3: He's seen in John Landis' "The Blues Brothers" and Landis is seen in his "1941". Steven Spielberg. 4: He was Mookie the delivery boy in "Do the Right Thing". Spike Lee. 5: 1 of the 2 directors who play the 2 main husbands in "Husbands and Wives". (1 of) Sydney Pollack (or Woody Allen). Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia! Special thanks to https://blog.feedspot.com/trivia_podcasts/
Welcome back to Artbeat Radio! ART Center had the amazing vocational opportunity to participate in The Inclusive Theater Festival this year. They Zoomed in from Long Beach to Chicago to share what they had been working on for the past semester in their Shakespeare class, performing monologues in costume from Taming of the Shrew, and participating in a panel for questions about their process. Listen in as they share their monologues in an ABR exclusive performance. With Nancy Terrey as Petruchio, Brian Corder as Sly Christopher, Aaron Francis as Bianca, and Eric Recillas as Baptista, this is an episode you do not want to miss! A special thank you to Seesaw Theater and the ART Center costume and props department. Becky Neuhaus, Lisa Mellow, Lorenia Varela, and Ricky Parral designed costumes and props to be used in the live performance.Seesaw Theatre's Seventh Annual Inclusive Theatre Festival is a weekend-long conference celebrating the strides being made in inclusive and accessible theatre. This event aims to bring together theatre artists and practitioners from across the country, giving us all the chance to learn about the amazing work being done and how we can improve our own work while supporting marginalized communities. This event is intended not only for theatre artists (students and professionals alike), but also for the disability community and their families, educators working with disabled individuals, and truly anyone interested in this ever-expanding and heart-warming field of inclusive theatre.Thanks for listening and tune in next time! For more information about our organization, please visit our website www.ableartswork.org Audio Transcription: (Please listen on Podomatic or Spotify to view the full transcript) *Intro music by Artbeat Radio staff* Music, stories, and more! You're listening to Artbeat Radio, a program of Able ARTS Work. Aaron: Welcome to Artbeat Radio Brian: This semester, we've been working on taming of the shrew. A play by William Shakespeare Nancy: In fact, we presented our work at the Inclusive Theater Festival in Chicago. Brian: You're about to hear the monologues that we've been working on for taming of the shrew. All: Enjoy! Brian as Christopher Sly: What, would you make me mad? Am not I Christopher? Sly's old, Sly's son of Burtonheath? By birth a peddler, by education, a cardmaker, by transmutation a bear-heard and now by present profession, a tinker? As Marian Hacket, the fat ale-wife of Wincot, if she know me not. If she say I am not 14 pence on the score for sheer ale, score me up for the lyingest knave in Christendom. What, I am not bestraught! Aaron as Biana: Why, I am past my gamut long ago. Oh, alright. “A re”. To plead Hortensio's passion. “B me” Bianca, take him for thy lord. “C fa ut” that loves with all affection. “D sol re” one clef, two notes have I - “E la mi” show pity or I die. Call you this gamut? Tut, I like it not! Old fashions please me best; I am not so nice to change true rules for odd inventions *Shuffling noises* Eric Signor Baptista: Why, how now, dame. Whence grows this insolence? Bianca, stand aside- poor girl, she weeps. Go ply thy needle, meddle not with her. For shame, thou hilding of a devilish spirit. Why doust thou wrong her that did ne'er wrong thee? When did she cross thee with a bitter word? What, in my sight! Bianca, get thee in. Was ever gentlemen thus grieved as I? But who comes here? Nancy as Petruchio: They shall go forward, Kate, at thy command. Carouse full measure to her maidenhead, be mad and merry, or go hang yourselves; but, for my bonny Kate, I will be master of what is mine own. She is my goods, my household stuff, my field, my horse, my ox, my ass, my anything; and here she stands, touch her whoever dare! Draw forth thy weapon, we are beset with thieves; rescue thy mistress if thou be a man. I'll buckler thee against a million! Nancy: Join us next time for more from Able ARTS Work. *Original piano orchestration of “Brush up your Shakespeare” from Kiss me Kate played by Eric Recillas on keyboard, accompanied by an original backtrack also written by Eric Recillas* Nancy and Brian: Goodbye from Able ARTS Work! Nancy: Cut! *Outro music by Artbeat Radio staff* We hope you enjoyed this episode of Artbeat Radio. For more information, please go to our website. Ableartswork.org. Thanks for listening and tune in next time!
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 611, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: The Boris Yeltsin File 1: 1931:Boris Yeltsin is born in Sverdlovsk, an industrial region in these mountains. the Ural Mountains. 2: 1985:This new General Secretary of the Communist Party brings Yeltsin to Moscow. Gorbachev. 3: 1986:Yeltsin is inducted into this national executive and policymaking committee. the Politburo. 4: 1994:Yeltsin orders Russian troops into this rebellious republic. Chechnya. 5: 1999:Yeltsin names this 15-year KGB veteran his successor. Putin. Round 2. Category: I Read The Articles, Too 1: "When they eat your dog, they're not so cute" was the headline on a USA Today article on these from Miami. alligators. 2: Scottish-born John Muir wrote the 1902 Ency. Britannica article on this valley in the Sierra Nevada of California. Yosemite. 3: In the 1945 magazine article "Extra-Terrestrial Relays", Arthur C. Clarke suggested these devices be used. satellites. 4: You can't escape the fact that the 1926 Encyclopedia Britannica article on conjuring was done by him. Houdini. 5: In an 1850 article, Dickens described his visit to this "Old Lady of Threadneedle Street". the Bank of England. Round 3. Category: Name The Musical 1: "Let the Sunshine in". Hair. 2: King Arthur,Merlin,Morgan Le Fey. Camelot. 3: Magaldi,Peron's mistress,People of Argentina. Evita. 4: "The Music of the Night". Phantom of the Opera. 5: "Luck Be a Lady". Guys and Dolls. Round 4. Category: Countries 1: North American mainland country which straddles the Tropic of Cancer. Mexico. 2: In the famous play, "Charlie's Aunt" was from this country "where the nuts come from". Brazil. 3: This food crop, Burma's most important, is pictured on its flag. rice. 4: You can say just Bosnia or Bosnia and this, the southern part of the country. Herzegovina. 5: Ras Dashen, this African country's highest peak, has been translated as "General Who Fights in Front of the Emperor". Ethiopia. Round 5. Category: Smooching In Shakespeare 1: He claims that the sleeping Michael Cassio kissed him hard while dreaming of Desdemona. Iago. 2: He says, "Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft" while holding Yorick's skull. Hamlet. 3: "Love's Labour's Lost" and "Henry VI, Part III" both mention the kiss of this Biblical traitor. Judas Iscariot. 4: In this comedy Petruchio says, "Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday". Taming of the Shrew. 5: "We have kiss'd away kingdoms and provinces" says Scarus in the play about this title couple. Antony and Cleopatra. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia! Special thanks to https://blog.feedspot.com/trivia_podcasts/
Laughter ensues when taming shrews! But what of the troublesome tropes Shakespeare mansplained? Alpha Petruchio is determined to keep his good lady wife Kate dicknotized and submissive. His servant Grumio, who moonlights as a sales rep for Fantasia Tickle Toys, cheers him on. Kate is a former ferocious shrew who caught feelings for Petruchio. She's very nearly tamed, well on her way to a new identity as a sweet and docile housewife. It's time to renounce shrewish ways—until O'Felia from the block seizes the moment. Who the hell wants to be tamed? What's up with this gaslighting? It's more than a disruption of the intestinal humors... Meet the Artists: https://deanproductionstheatre.com/best-beware-my-sting-episode/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/dptc/support
The Taming of the Shrew by William Shakespeare audiobook. The Taming of the Shrew is one of Shakespeare's earliest comedies, and was inspired by classical Roman comedy and the Italian commedia dell'arte. Baptista Minola, a rich gentleman of Padua, has two daughters: Katherina, renowned for her sharp tongue, and Bianca, who is sought after by multiple suitors. Baptista decides that Bianca cannot marry until her elder sister finds a husband. Enter Petruchio, who has come to "wive it wealthily in Padua," and who is convinced by Bianca's suitors to woo Katherina. The play ultimately poses the question of who is the bigger shrew: Kate or Petruchio. The subplot involves the subterfuge employed by Lucentio to woo the lovely Bianca.
We're hitting pause on our look through Shakespearean soliloquies to take a moment to share our latest discovery! With the inspiration of Kyara Hunter, a Masters student at the Shakespeare Institute in Stratford-upon-Avon, we're bringing to you the idea of another type of formatting: Bullet Formatting What's this? How is it different from verse or paragraph? And how do Abbot and Costello use it in their famous "Who's on First?" routine? Picture: Abbot and Costello "Who's on First?" - Kate and Petruchio in Gaudete Academy's "Taming of the Shrew" (2010) - "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead" at the Old Vic Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/hamlettohamilton Website: http://www.hamlettohamilton.com
The Taming of the Shrew is one of Shakespeare's most controversial and ambiguous comedies. Written in the early 1590s, it purports to tell the story of how a “shrew,” the strong-willed Katherine, is “tamed” by the even stronger-willed fortune hunter Petruchio. Petruchio marries Katherine and, in the eyes of onlookers, seem to “kill[] her in her own humour.” But the play leaves us wondering whether Katherine really is tamed – and whether Petruchio, Shakespeare, or Shakespeare's own audiences really wanted her to be. As much as this play draws critical fire, it continues to draw artists' and audiences' attention as we return to this play again and again to ask our own questions and make our own statements about gender and gender roles. In this course, you'll learn the story of The Taming of the Shrew, explore the relationship between Katherine and Petruchio and the many possible ways of interpreting it, and discuss what the play reveals about what we need from theatre and from Shakespeare. In Part 1, you'll be guided through a detailed account of the story with commentary by Emma Smith, Professor of Shakespeare Studies at the University of Oxford. You'll see how Shakespeare embeds, within the text and physical action of the play, crucial questions about Katherine and Petruchio that the text itself doesn't answer. This summary is told using the language of the play itself, placing key quotations in context to help you understand where these lines come from and what they mean.
Part 3 features close-readings of two key speeches, one from Petruchio and one from Katherine. These speeches are performed in two different ways: as originally written, and with the gender pronouns reversed as they were in the 2019 RSC production of Taming, whose lead actors perform the speeches. These double performances help us reflect on our own reactions to the play's provocative take on gender. Speeches and Performers: Petruchio/Petruchia, Act 4, “Thus have I politicly begun my reign …” (Claire Price) (two versions) Katherine, Act 5, “Fie, fie! Unknit that threat'ning unkind brow” (Joseph Arkley) (two versions)
When I saw Ray Liotta had died, I was shocked and saddened. I was a fan of his work and he seemed like a good human. In his honor, I listened to an interview he did with Marc Maron on the WTF podcast a few years ago and enjoyed learning more about him and his journey. It did make me think, though. And it did make me wish for change in the way we do show biz. Apparently, Liotta had no real interest in acting when the opportunity to do it presented itself to him. He got talked into auditioning for a show because of a cute girl and stuck around because a teacher encouraged him. Nothing too crazy there. I've definitely heard this sort of story before. But it's the reason that Liotta theorized that his teacher encouraged him that got me thinking. Liotta had always been a jock and, it sounds like, a fairly macho guy. His teacher responded to him because they didn't get a lot of guy's guys there in the college theatre department. He saw a kindred male spirit and a kind of rare bird that they needed on the stage. Liotta really wasn't that keen on acting in the beginning but he got to play some very juicy roles at his university and it's not just because he was good. I'm guessing Liotta's college decided to do A Streetcar Named Desire because they had a guy who could play Stanley Kowalski. They did Taming of the Shrew probably because they had a guy who could do a macho Petruchio. Liotta got to learn how to act by doing some of the best roles in the canon and the college got to do some shows on its list. All very reasonable. Many a school will choose their season based on who they have in casting pool. I get it on all levels. To keep reading Men Most Macho in Theatre visit the Songs for the Struggling Artist blog. This is Episode 314 Song: Macho Man Image of Ray Liotta via Wikicommons To support this podcast: Give it 5 stars in Apple Podcasts. Write a nice review! Rate it wherever you listen or via: https://ratethispodcast.com/strugglingartist Join my mailing list: www.emilyrainbowdavis.com/ Like the blog/show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SongsfortheStrugglingArtist/ Support me on Patreon: www.patreon.com/emilyrdavis Or buy me a coffee on Kofi: http://ko-fi.com/emilyrainbowdavis or PayPal me: https://www.paypal.me/strugglingartist Follow me on Twitter @erainbowd Instagram and Pinterest Tell a friend! Listen to The Dragoning here (it's my audio drama) and support via Ko-fi here: https://ko-fi.com/messengertheatrecompany As ever, I am yours, Emily Rainbow Davis
SEEN: JUNE 14, 2022 With special guests Colette, Fomby, and Gabe. By William Shakespeare Directed by Shana Cooper “Come on, and kiss me, Kate.” Is anyone a match for the brash and strong-willed Katherine? The dashing adventurer Petruchio thinks he's up to the challenge. Two of the sexiest figures in all of world theatre set off sparks in a clash of wills that is as bold as it is uproarious. Shakespeare's masterful comedic take on the battle of the sexes turns everything we think about love, marriage, and gender on its head. Director Shana Cooper brings to the Globe her daring and contemporary staging, which The New York Times praised as “an exhilarating new way to look at the comedy through modern eyes,” and The Wall Street Journal's theatre critic called “the best Shrew I've ever reviewed.” An earlier version of this production of The Taming of the Shrew premiered at Hudson Valley Shakespeare Festival (Davis McCallum, Artistic Director; Kate Liberman, Managing Director) in June 2018. The Taming of the Shrew is supported by lead production sponsor Darlene Marcos Shiley, production sponors Diane Berol in memory of John Berol, Karen and Donald Cohn, Silvija and Brian Devine, The Conrad Prebys Foundation, Jean and Gary Shekhter, and the Erna Finci Viterbi Artistic Director Fund, with additional artist sponsors The Lodge at Torrey Pines (for director Shana Cooper). This production is supported in part by the Jean and Gary Shekhter Fund for Classic Theatre.
The Mercenary and The Shrew...Petruchio and Kate...what do we think about this strange classic? Do we ship this crazy Shakespearean couple? Listen to find out! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/weshipitpodcast/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/weshipitpodcast/support
Season Three we're studying soliloquy! This week we look at the villain soliloquies. Or the, "this is what I've done, am doing, will do" soliloquies. Or the, "I've already got a plan and am letting you in on it" soliloquies. How can you differentiate your villains (or go-getters)? How can you keep a character's personality in tact when they're giving exposition? We look at some Shakespearean characters to see how the Bard failed, and eventually succeeded. Take a walk with us as we compare Richard III (Richard III), Iago (Othello), Edmund (King Lear), Don John (Much Ado About Nothing) and Petruchio (The Taming of the Shrew). Learn more: http://www.hamlettohamilton.com Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/hamlettohamilton
Everyone is always asking about my microvirus! The Acamarians had a schism with their brethren who became galactic scavengers and/or Petruchio understudies from Kiss Me Kate. Now Picard and the Federation want them to get along so the raiding stops in this sector, but there's a little blood feud investigation that Riker and Dr. Crusher must take care of first. Oops! The Acamarian brandy is about to go down while the phaser settings go up to disintegrate. Buckle in and re:engage! Get in touch with us on Twitter @ReEngageTNG! Host: Jimmie G (@thejimmieg on IG & Twitter) Panel: Erik Gratton (@erikfallsdown on Twitter & IG), Greg Tito (@gregtito on Twitter, @greg_tito on IG) , and Kate Jaeger (@jaegerlicious on Twitter and IG) Audio Editor: Greg Tito (@gregtito on Twitter, @greg_tito on IG) Logo artwork: @mojojojo_97 on Twitter, mojo97.com Theme music: Ryan Marth Next up is the s3e10 "The Defector" hosted by Kate!
My guest this week was Stephan Wolfert. Stephan left a career in the military for a life in the theatre after seeing Shakespeare's Richard III. Stephan Received his Master of Fine Arts degree from Trinity Repertory Conservatory in Providence, Rhode Island. On Broadway, Stephan created and directed the military segments for Twyla Tharp & Billy Joel's Tony-Award winning production Movin' Out and a character coach for Cirque du Soleil's, Mystere. He also co-created a touring Shakespeare Company for Trinity Rep Company, directed and taught acting Shakespeare at Cornell University and at Antelope Valley College. Currently, Stephan is based out of NYC where he is an actor and the Director of Veterans Outreach for the critically-acclaimed, award-winning off-Broadway company Bedlam. He is also the creator of https://www.decruit.org/ (DE-CRUIT®)–a program to reintegrate military Veterans using Shakespeare, psychology and classical actor training. For more than a decade Stephan has worked with two Native American theater companies: Native Voices in Los Angeles and Native Earth in Toronto, Canada. Stephan was also the Founding Artistic Director for: Shakespeare & Veterans, and the Veterans Center for the Performing Arts (V.C.P.A.) in Los Angeles. For his work with Shakespeare & Veterans, Stephan has received a certificate of appreciation from the City Council of Los Angeles, presented by fellow veteran and councilman the late Bill Rosendahl. He has been published in the fields of art and science for his work, and is also a member of the NYU think tank PACH (Project for the Advancement of our Common Humanity). As an actor Stephan continues to perform his critically-acclaimed, award-winning, one-man show CRY HAVOC off-Broadway, nationally and internationally. His most recent off-Broadway productions for Bedlam were The Seagull, Sense & Sensibility, Hamlet and Saint Joan. His favorite Shakespeare roles performed include: Richard III, Richard III; Pericles, Pericles; Petruchio, Taming of the Shrew; Antony, Antony & Cleopatra; Cassio, Iago, Othello; Leontes, Polixenes, The Winter's Tale; Antonio, Measure for Measure; Cassius, Julius Caesar; Mercutio, Paris, Friar Lawrence, Romeo & Juliet; Andrew Aguecheek, Orsino, Twelfth Night. His favorite Shakespeare plays he has directed are: Twelfth Night, Macbeth, Coriolanus, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Othello, King Lear, Much Ado About Nothing, and an all-female production of Henry V. Follow Stephan https://www.instagram.com/decruitvets/ (here). Learn more about De-Cruit https://www.decruit.org/ (here).
Today's episode tackles one issue and one issue only, and that is to refute the assertion that The Taming of the Shrew is about “romance” (whatever the F that means). We examine a variation in the text between First Folio printing and several modern editions that seem to either soften or double down on Petruchio's “domination” of Katherine, and eventually come to the conclusion that no matter which way you slice it, the entire charade is unnecessary. We unpack the term “romantic” and why our mothers' opinions on romantic love might not have aged well, as well as quite possibly the only interpretation of Shrew that could make its protagonists journey actually romantic. No spoilers. #consentissexy
We had a great conversation with Producer & Writer Lloyd J. Schwartz on The Chris & Sandy Show. We talked about so many things from his Classic Couples Counseling, his life growing up with his father Sherwood Schwartz, some about The Brady Bunch & Gilligans Island, he told some really amazing stories to a whole lot more!Lloyd J. Schwartz is the playwright. A man of all media, he wrote for the TV series Love, American Style; Alice; The Munsters Today; The A Team, The Love Boat, Baywatch and more. As an ABC network executive, he supervised production on Happy Days, Laverne and Shirley, What's Happening and Three's Company. With his father, TV legend Sherwood Schwartz, he co-created Harper Valley P.T.A. Lloyd also produced numerous iterations of the Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island franchises (created by Sherwood) for feature films, television and stage. With his wife Barbara, Lloyd created the long-running Storybook Theatre at Theatre West. He has also had 34 produced plays.CLASSIC COUPLES COUNSELING OPENS APRIL 1 AT THEATRE WEST. THIS PRODUCTION HAS BROADWAY POTENTIAL TELEVISION WRITER/PRODUCER OF THE BRADY BUNCH & GILLIGANS ISLANDLLOYD SCHWARTZ IS THE WRITER/ BRAINCHILD BEHIND THIS PRODUCTIONSchwartz said “ I was intrigued with the idea of what would happen if the very troubled Shakespearean characters went to couples therapy. What would it be like if Hamlet and Ophelia sought help? Or Romeo and Juliet? Or MacBeth and Lady MacBeth? Or Othello and Desdemona? or Kate and Petruchio? Would it help? And I then started imagining if the therapist had her own problems which would make her patient's problems even worse. And it leads to a group therapy where they are all there, and whatever problems they have get even worse. CLASSIC COUPLES COUNSELING is a comedy that pokes fun at Shakespeare's most famous couples...a comedy about tragedies. Or as Shakespeare said in "A ;Midsummer's Night Dreram:" "Oh, what fools these mortals. be."Established in 1962, Theatre West is the oldest continually running professional theatre company in the city of Los Angeles. It is a membership collective of actors, playwrights, directors, and technicians. Theatre West's alumni members include Ray Bradbury, Beau Bridges, Richard Dreyfuss, Sally Field, Betty Garrett, Martin Landau, Lee Meriwether, Jack Nicholson, Carroll O'Connor, Sherwood Schwartz, Joyce Van Patton, and Paul Winfield. Theatre West has produced more than 300 plays and musicals. Of these plays, nearly 70% are original works developed in its workshops and many have led to Broadway, regional tours, and feature films including A Bronx Tale by Chazz Palminteri and A Very Brady Musical by Lloyd Schwartz and Hope Juber. Our season continues with Moose on the Loose by Dina Morrone in June 2022, and Storybook Theatre's Goldilocks and the Three Bears is running Saturday matinees until June 2022. Theatre West is supported in part by The Ahmanson Foundation, California Arts Council, Los Angeles Department of Cultural Affairs, Kaplan-Loring Foundation, and Peter Glenville Foundation.#BradyBunch #Gilligansisland #TVLegend
Faz 30 anos que #EduardoMoscovis fez seu primeiro papel de relevo numa novela: o Tíbor de #PedraSobrePedra. De lá para cá vieram #AsPupilasDoSenhorReitor, #PorAmor, #PecadoCapital, #OCravoEARosa, #SenhoraDoDestino, #AlmaGêmea, #LoucoPorElas, #ARegraDoJogo... O #ValeAPena rememora a trajetória do ator. Vem com a gente!
Friends of the pod Alejandra Escalante and Daniel José Molina are playing Kate and Petruchio in the five-actor American Players Theatre production of The Taming of the Shrew, directed by Shana Cooper, until November 14, 2021. Alejandra and Daniel discuss how they decided to do the play; how they approached their characters; what the play is about now; how the language defines the play; the advantages of seeing many previous productions; how it's a play about navigating relationships, the various worlds of the play, marriage; and, ultimately, two misfits in a patriarchal, transactional society. BONUS: Here's where you can watch this production online! (Length 26:27) (PICTURED: Alejandra Escalante and Daniel José Molina in Taming of the Shrew at American Players Theatre, directed by Shana Cooper, 2021. Photo by Liz Lauren.) The post Kate And Petruchio appeared first on Reduced Shakespeare Company.
Today, I am so honored to announce my episode with the amazing Meg Bussert. Meg transitioned from being one of the most active ingenues on Broadway in the 1980s to one of the most sought-after character actresses today. Hear her tell some of the stories of her amazing career on our interview, including a suggestion she got from Meredith Willson, the direction from Michael Kidd that left her speechless, how she made Debbie Reynolds nervous, why John Raitt wasn't right for Petruchio, figuring out an accent for South Pacific, her go-to audition song, the magic of Tessie O'Shea and Gemze De Lappe, how she set off a fire alarm at the Westchester Broadway Theater, a telegram from Mary Martin, plus Edward Gorey, Barbara Cook, Alan Jay Lerner, and more!! You can also see her in a celebration of Jonathan Tunick happening October 2 at the Sharon Playhouse. Tickets are available here: https://www.sharonplayhouse.org/2021spotlight
CAST in order of appearance: Ali Tallman as Lucentio, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Caryl Farkas as Baptista & Widow, Zoe Margolis as Hortensio, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine, William Wilder as Gremio, Morgan Hollingsworth as Bianca, Grayson Kirtland as Vincentio, Elizabeth Glass as Tranio, Mairi Chanel as Biondello. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Grayson Kirtland as Grumio, William Wilder as Curtis & Nicholas, Zoe Margolis as Nathaniel, Morgan Hollingsworth as Phillip & Peter, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Joseph and Katherine, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Mairi Chanel as Biondello & Pedant, Ali Tallman as Lucentio, William Wilder as Gremio, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Grayson Kirtland as Vincentio, Elizabeth Glass as Tranio, Caryl Farkas as Baptista, Morgan Hollingsworth as Bianca, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine, Zoe Margolis as Hortensio, Grayson Kirtland as Vincentio. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Grayson Kirtland as Grumio, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Zoe Margolis as Hortensio, Morgan Hollingsworth as Haberdasher, Ali Tallman as Tailor. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
Anddd we are on to our Act 5 ofTaming of the Shrew discussion…ok here we go. Among many things we talk Kate and Petruchio turning into spectators and watching other public disorders, flashbacks to the induction where character upon character reinforces the lie, Bianca's personality change, hierarchy and freedom, the weird of dynamics of the end, and what on earth happens to Sly. Our Ensemble for this production includes: Brittany Chandler, Mairi Chanel, Caryl Farkas, Elizabeth Glass, Morgan Hollingsworth, Grayson Kirtland, Zoe Margolis, Nicholas Koy Santillo, Ali Tallman, Will Wilder facilitated and directed by Ariana Karp.
We move on to part 1 of our discussion of Act IV of Taming of the Shrew! (This episode covers scenes 1 & 2.) Among many things we discussed Grumio's garbled thoughts, status relationships within Petruchio's household staff, servants noting behavioral changes, Kate beginning to prevent violence, Shakespeare implicating the entire audience, entitlement and teamwork, the ethical dilemma of Petruchio's behavior, Bianca and Kate both being referred to as headstrong haggards (or strong-willed birds of prey), and Tranio's constant status shifting. Our Ensemble for this production includes: Brittany Chandler, Mairi Chanel, Caryl Farkas, Elizabeth Glass, Morgan Hollingsworth, Grayson Kirtland, Zoe Margolis, Nicholas Koy Santillo, Ali Tallman, Will Wilder facilitated and directed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Caryl Farkas as Baptista, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine, Elizabeth Glass as Tranio, Mairi Chanel as Biondello, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Ali Tallman as Lucentio, William Wilder as Gremio, Grayson Kirtland as Grumio, Morgan Hollingsworth as Bianca. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
And off we go to Act 3 of Taming of the Shrew! We discuss how all of Bianca's suitors are under false pretenses, how the suitors are more interested in competing with each other than actually getting to know Bianca, the connection to the Lord's game of messing with Christopher Sly, the lack of danger or class barriers in Lucentio's and Hortensio's disguises, Kate trying out new tactics, Petruchio's rejection of societal norms, and the heavy cultural baggage of staging this play. Our Ensemble for this production includes: Brittany Chandler, Mairi Chanel, Caryl Farkas, Elizabeth Glass, Morgan Hollingsworth, Grayson Kirtland, Zoe Margolis, Nicholas Koy Santillo, Ali Tallman, Will Wilder facilitated and directed by Ariana Karp.
It's time for Act II of Taming of the Shrew when Kate and Petruchio finally meet! Among many things we discussed entering the private realm of the household, sibling rivalry and family dynamics, fighting over the same object, the bidding war over Bianca versus the war of words for Katherine, and challenging received interpretations of the play and the central relationship. Our Ensemble for this production includes: Brittany Chandler, Mairi Chanel, Caryl Farkas, Elizabeth Glass, Morgan Hollingsworth, Grayson Kirtland, Zoe Margolis, Nicholas Koy Santillo, Ali Tallman, Will Wilder facilitated and directed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Grayson Kirtland as Grumio, Zoe Margolis as Hortensio, William Wilder as Gremio, Ali Tallman as Lucentio, Elizabeth Glass as Tranio, Mairi Chanel as Biondello. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
CAST in order of appearance: Morgan Hollingsworth as Bianca, Nicholas Koy Santillo as Katherine, Caryl Farkas as Baptista, William Wilder as Gremio, Brittany Chandler as Petruchio, Elizabeth Glass as Tranio, Zoe Margolis as Hortensio. Facilitated, edited, and with music composed and performed by Ariana Karp.
Napsáno 1600 - 1602, literární druh: drama, žánr: pětidílná tragédie (aristotelovské schéma) téma: nerozhodnost, msta, vražda, minulost motiv: nenaplněná láska, nedůvěra, pomíjivost života časoprostor - Elsinor, jazyk: blankvers - pětistopý nerýmovaný jamb odpovídá postavě - hovorový x formální státnická řeč Claudia, někdy archaismy, knižní výrazy (srov. ahistorický anachronismus x historická autentičnost) herec Richard Burbage (1619), porestaurační doba (klasicismus) - konec transvestitismu - komedie mravů x tragédie William Dovenant (refinement), chronologický postup ŽIVOT(1564 -1616) - gymnázium, osm let starší Anne Hathway, kočovné divadlo, po sedmi letech Londýn, Globe - 1603 požár, zpět Stratford DÍLO 1) do 1600 - komedie ZKROCENÍ ZLÉ ŽENY (THE TAMING OF THE SHREW) - Kateřina, Petruchio, Bianca Kiss me, Kate, MNOHO POVYKU PRO NIC, WINDSORSKÉ PANIČKY, SEN NOCI SVATOJÁNSKÉ (A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM) - Demetrios - hádka s Helenou, Lysandr, elf Puk, na závěr divadelní hra, KUPEC BENÁTSKÝ (THE MERCHANT OF VENICE)historické hry: Jindřich IV, Jindřich V, Jindřich VI, Richard II (THE TRAGEDY OF KING RICHARD THE SECOND) - Jindřich Bolingrok x Thomas Mowbray, Richard III , JULIUS CAESAR, ROMEO A JULIE, 2. Období - tragédie - OTHELLO, MOUŘENÍN BENÁTSKÝ (OTHELLO, THE MOOR OF VENICE) - žárlivost, Jago, Cassio, Desdemona, šátek, sebevražda, KRÁL LEAR - Cordelia, Closter, Edgar, Edmund, MACBETH, HAMLET, ANTONIUS A KLEOPATRA 3. Období - romance, tragikomedie - CIMBÁL (CIMBALIN), ZIMNÍ POHÁDKA (THE WINTER'S TALE) Bohemia, žárlivost, nevinnost, BOUŘE (THE TEMPEST), SONETY - 152, mladému muži a černé dámě, Sonet 66 - Save that to die I leave my love alone OBECNĚ KULTURNÍ KONTEXT: - Pierre de Ronsard - Lásky - přes 400 milostných sonetů, ód, elegií Geoffrey Chaucer - Canterburské povídky (Canterbury tales) - 29 postav, aabb, desetistopý rýmovaný jamb - srov 100 novel Dekameron (Giovanni Boccacio), Francesco Petrarca - Zpěvník (Sonety Lauře), Dante Allighieri - duchovní epos Božská komedie, Dekameron Francois Villon - Závěť - velký testament, Odkaz - malý testament, Michel de Montaigne - Eseje (srov. 4. 4. Hamlet), 19. Století 1. Shakespearovská společnost - Německo INSPIRACE: SAXO GRAMMATIVUS: PŘÍBĚH AMLETA, PRINCE JUTSKÉHO, NOC S HAMLETEM (1964) - Vladimír Holan, HAPRDÁNS neboli HAmlet PRinc DÁNSký ve zkratce - hovorová čeština, mezihry INSCENACE 20. Stol.: Německo: Hamlet 1945 x 1989 - Heinrich Müller HAMLET/MACHINE, Ron Daniels a Marc Rylance - 1989 - osobní vztahy
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 73, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Money Slang 1: The shell of this mollusk is composed chiefly of calcium carbonate. a clam. 2: Proverbially, you can "break" this food, or "take (it) out of someone's mouth"; earn some dough. bread. 3: Bank notes that sing before fa-so-la. Do-re-mi. 4: When speaking of Messrs. Netanyahu or Britten, it's all about the first name, pluralized. the Benjamins. 5: 2-word phrase for Henny Penny's lunch. Chicken feed. Round 2. Category: Flag 'Em Down 1: The flag of this U.S. possession is almost the same as the flag of Cuba. Puerto Rico. 2: This descriptive nickname of the U.S. flag was coined by Francis Scott Key. the Star-Spangled Banner. 3: The 2 colors found on all 3 national flags of the U.S., Mexico and Canada. red and white. 4: The Alamo is located in this city and is depicted on its flag. San Antonio. 5: The first 50-star U.S. flag was officially raised on July 4 of this year. 1960. Round 3. Category: The Exodus Files 1: It's the mount where Moses talks with God in Exodus 19. Sinai. 2: Thou knowest this list of nay-nays shows up in Exodus 20. the Ten Commandments. 3: Using gold jewelry from the Israelites, he fashions the Golden Calf. Aaron. 4: 33:2 promises to drive the Amorite, Hittite, Perizzite, Hivite, Jebusite, and this -ite from the promised land. the Canaanite. 5: This unusual food falls from heaven for 40 years starting in Exodus 16. manna. Round 4. Category: Shakespeare Pitches To Hollywood 1: "Battle of the Sexes" story, Katharina vs. Petruchio; she's tough but love wins out...it's a blockbuster!. "Taming of the Shrew". 2: This one's about a wannabe Scottish king and his wife, right, and he kills King Duncan...is Connery available?. "Macbeth". 3: Okay, this military guy marries a younger woman named Desdemona -- now the ending's sad, but that means Oscar!. "Othello". 4: 2 young lovers, families keep 'em apart -- it'd be a teen flick but we won't shoot in Verona; too expensive. "Romeo and Juliet". 5: So this king is crying about his kingdom for a horse and ...oh, you already made it in '55 with Olivier? Nuts!. "Richard III". Round 5. Category: It's A Jungle Out There 1: About 2/3 of this river's 2.3 million square mile tropical rain forest lies in Brazil. Amazon. 2: A large knife whose name comes from an earlier Spanish word for "mallet"; it's handy for cutting jungle paths. Machete. 3: The length of this South American water boa may exceed 30 feet. Anaconda. 4: 6-letter term for the thick covering formed by the tops of trees and vines where many animals live. Canopy. 5: In 1863 French archaeologists began uncovering this temple of Vishnu in the jungles of Cambodia. Angkor Wat. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia!
Welcome to the Instant Trivia podcast episode 54, where we ask the best trivia on the Internet. Round 1. Category: Musical Geography 1: Pick me up some spices if you're going to this Simon and Garfunkel "Fair". "Scarborough Fair". 2: City mentioned in the title of the TV show whose theme is heard here:. Beverly Hills, 90210. 3: "Start spreading the news", Ol' Blue Eyes made it here. New York. 4: This "house in New Orleans" has "been the ruin of many a poor boy". The House of the Rising Sun. 5: It's where Fats Domino found his thrill in 1956. "Blueberry Hill". Round 2. Category: Ripley's Believe It Or Not! 1: B.I.O.N., Texan David Pay has written over 300 alphabetic characters on a single grain of this!. rice. 2: B.I.O.N., a 3-year old Ugandan boy was adopted and raised for 4 years by a colony of these human-like apes!. chimps. 3: B.I.O.N., herpetologist Bill Haast has been bitten over 150 times by these deadly creatures!. snakes. 4: B.I.O.N., every year a Filipino village recreates this event of around 30 A.D. using nails. the crucifixion. 5: B.I.O.N., because he believes it's possessed by his dead fiancee, a man married one of these dolls!. a Barbie doll. Round 3. Category: Great Rulers 1: This king of Judea from 37-4 B.C. was a friend of Mark Anthony. Herod (the Great). 2: Justinian the Great's wife was a former one of these, like the wife of the Great Communicator, Ronald Reagan. an actress. 3: Constantine the Great was the first Roman ruler to convert to this religion. Christianity. 4: He was born June 9, 1672, the son of Czar Alexis I Mikhailovich. Peter the Great. 5: By 896 A.D. this West Saxon king had captured the city of London. Alfred the Great. Round 4. Category: Funny Pages 1: "Rock This". Chris Rock. 2: "Leading with my Chin". Jay Leno. 3: "I Rant, Therefore I Am". Dennis Miller. 4: "Enter Whining". Fran Drescher. 5: "Sein Language". Jerry Seinfeld. Round 5. Category: Smooching In Shakespeare 1: In this comedy Petruchio says, "Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday". Taming of the Shrew. 2: "We have kiss'd away kingdoms and provinces" says Scarus in the play about this title couple. Antony and Cleopatra. 3: "Love's Labour's Lost" and "Henry VI, Part III" both mention the kiss of this Biblical traitor. Judas Iscariot. 4: He claims that the sleeping Michael Cassio kissed him hard while dreaming of Desdemona. Iago. 5: He says, "Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft" while holding Yorick's skull. Hamlet. Thanks for listening! Come back tomorrow for more exciting trivia!
Welcome back to the 16th episode of The Cup which is our a weekly (give or take, TBD, these are unprecedented times) performing arts talk show presented by Cup of Hemlock Theatre. The theatres may be closed, but art finds a way to survive! For the time being on this podcast we are rereleasing our past reviews, interviews, roundtables, and duet reviews in remastered audio only versions so you can take your CoH content on the go! For our 16th episode we continue to release our inaugural run of The Cup: Reviews, where we reviewed the Stratford Festival Production series that streamed on YouTube last spring. In this episode we discussed the 2015 production of The Taming of the Shrew, directed by Chris Abraham, starring Ben Carlson and Deborah Hay in the roles of Petruchio and Katherina. You can watch this production and all other Stratford Festival productions on their new streaming platform Stratfest@Home. Here is the link (subscription needed): https://www.stratfordfestival.ca/AtHome Cup of Hemlock Theatre is a Toronto-based performing arts collective dedicated to staging works that examine the moral quandaries of the human experience. With an inquisitive compass, we aim to provide audiences the space to retrace their personal stories and navigate their individual ideologies. Follow us on Instagram/Facebook/Twitter: cohtheatre Follow our panelists: Mackenzie Horner (Before the Downbeat: A Musical Podcast) – Instagram/Facebook: BeforetheDownbeat Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/before-the-downbeat-a-musical-podcast/id1478579754?uo=4 Monique Danielle – Instagram: mariannagailus Marianna Gailus – Instagram: monique4reals Will Bartley – Instagram: willrbartley --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/cup-of-hemlock-theatre/support
We have arrived at the final episode of my journey reading The Taming of the Shrew! With Daniel Skinner as our guest host we maul over the epic (ly frustrating and infuriating) ending of TOTS. Featuring one of the most infuriating monologues I've ever written, we dive deep into the P R O B L E M A T I C elements throughout the play. Cacophony ensues with all of our characters. We still love Tranio, still hate Petruchio. KATE WHY??? Lo and behold, the induction act ACTUALLY had a purpose. How does Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer get involved? Will Hayden be going to prison? Listen in to find out!
After a brief hiatus, Baffled by the Bard is barrelling to finish the Taming of the Shrew! In this episode we breakdown the last few scenes in Act 4 with our guest host, Jacqueline Silva, and boy do we get close to breaking down. We're starting to see ole' Billy Shakes wrap up this story with a nice little bow, and we feel certain ways about it. What's this??? Are we starting to hate Kate this late in the game? What would happen if the characters of iCarly were to put on Taming of the Shrew? How about Kanye West as Petruchio? Let's see if we can get Disney added onto the list of companies that could sue me. Gotta hit that play button to hear it all go down! Want to follow our guest host, Jacqueline Silva, and keep up with her artistic endeavors? DO IT!!! Instagram: @silva_and_gold Website: www.jacquelinecsilva.com I apologize for the wait on this episode as I've been transitioning to remote work and prioritizing this project and other creative endeavors! This is the next to last episode for Taming of the Shrew, and I plan to wrap up this first season before the start of the new year! Be on the lookout for that and thank you listeners for starting this awesome journey with me.
Julia Giolzetti joins host Stephanie Crugnola on this week's episode to argue which of Shakespeare's wooing scenes is the best! Julia proposes Romeo and Juliet's balcony scene and has Stephanie argue for Kate and Petruchio's first meeting (Taming of the Shrew)! Vote for who you think should be the winner on our Google Form - linked also on Facebook (/p2mpod) or Twitter (@p2mpod)! You can find Julia online on twitter or with her company Sofa Shakespeare (twitter!), or you can buy her a coffee! We are trying to get to 1000 downloads by Thanksgiving - so tag a friend who you think will enjoy the show! Special thanks to our new network: Serious Business for bringing us on board and giving us the space to discuss such an important element of Shakespearean Theatre. Check out their other two shows Adventure Incorporated (an actual play DnD 5e podcast) and Ask The Pokedexpert (a highly academic question and answer podcast/stream about Pokemon)!
We're back and taming our urge to punch Petruchio in the face! In today's episode we stumble through Act 4, scenes 1 and 2 with our fabulous guest host Lorena Cohea! Who could've guessed it, we still pretty much hate Petruchio....or do we? (The answer is yes, yes we do.) Why is he such a d-bag to his servants? Who in their right mind compares women to hawks? Will Hortensio ever find love again? What in god's name is Choler and Humors? Will I ever be able to keep up with all the Italian names? Only way you'll find out is by listening in! Want to follow our awesome guest on today's episode? Follow her on Instagram, @cohea_cohea, and keep up with Lorena and all her future artistic endeavours! Also, episodes will be coming out more regularly so be on the lookout for more of your favorite artsy idiot!
Teachers and weddings and priests, oh my! We rally on reading Taming of the Shrew with our guest host Ben Cohen on today's episode who has more than a few words to say about our boy Petruchio. Lucentio and Hortensio are neck and neck in their race to woo over the lovely Bianca. We've finally made it to the tumultuous wedding of Kate and Petruchio, which goes off without a hitch......not! Petey is late and shows up drunk, priests were tackled, and Biondello is confused as ever. Does Kate get kidnapped? Is it cool to swear at a wedding? WHAT'S WRONG WITH PETRUCHIO!? Give it a listen and find out! Shout out to Daniel Roth for the new logo design for Baffled by the Bard! We are now on Podbean! So give it a like, listen, follow, and download on there to help the podcast out!
We have a doozy of an episode here! The fantabulous Naomi Rose-Mock guest hosts with us today. Petruchio has entered the scene, and he comes in with a bang. We've got dueling disguised teachers for the Baptista household. Really, just a lot of disguised individuals....too many to count and follow if we're being honest. Sexy abacuses. Comparing Kate, Bianca, and their relationship as sisters. Double entendres galore! Does Daddy Baptista suck? (The answer: pretty much.) How are MATH, LANGUAGES, and MUSIC gonna help Hortensio and Lucentio woo Bianca? Can the irreverent Petruchio really woo the immovable Kate? WHAT DAY IS IT IN THE PLAY????? All of these topics and more, just waiting for you to hit that play button. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
In 2019, the "other RSC" -- in this case, the Royal Shakespeare Company -- offered a gender-flipped production of Taming of the Shrew that underscored the play's issues of hierarchy and power. Austin Tichenor and Dee Ryan saw the production as an NT Live broadcast and are joined by GoodTickleBrain's Mya Gosling and dramaturg Kate Pitt (who saw the production live onstage in Stratford) and they discuss how the production landed in the two formats. This fascinating book club conversation touches on the play's wonderful mutability; the comedy of straight male vanity; whether there’s a need to "fix" it; agreeing on the game of the scene; similarities to Henry and Kate in Henry V and other troublesome couples; woman-spreading and occupying space; surprising lack of sparks; transforming modern examples of masculine anger; and how (or whether) the play changes based on how (or whether) Petruchio changes. (Length 31:35) The post Gender-Flipping The Shrew appeared first on Reduced Shakespeare Company.
Les matinales – émission présentée par Sandrine Sebbane. Thème « Les adaptations au théâtre » avec Steve Suissa pour l’adaptation du livre « Les fleurs de soleil » de Simon Wiesenthal avec Thierry Lhermitte qui démarre le 16 janvier et Sara Biasini, comédienne, fille de Romy Schneider et Frédérique Lazarini adapteur et metteur en scène d’une version théâtre et film de « La mégère apprivoisée » deqShakespeare qui démarre le 14 janvier à l’Artistic théâtre À propos de la pièce : «Les fleurs de soleil » Mise en scène : Steve Suissa, assisté de Stéphanie Froeliger Texte : Simon Wiesenthal Adaptation : Daniel Cohen Décors : Emmanuelle Roy Costumes : Jean-Daniel Vuillermoz Lumières : Jacques Rouveyrollis, assisté de Jessica Duclos Musique/Son : Maxime Richelme Vidéo : Nathalie Cabrol Thierry Lhermitte interprète ici Simon Wiesenthal, né en Pologne en 1908, connu sous le nom de « chasseur de nazis ». Dès la fin de la Seconde Guerre mondiale, il n’a cessé de traquer les responsables de la « solution finale » afin de les livrer à la justice. En juin 1942, dans un camp de travail forcé, à Lemberg, dans d’étranges circonstances, un jeune SS à l’agonie rencontre un déporté juif pour une ultime confession. Le jeune officier, tiraillé par sa conscience, demande au déporté de lui pardonner, au nom de tous les juifs tués ou torturés, ses terribles crimes afin de mourir en paix… Simon Wiesenthal lui refuse cette grâce. Obsédé depuis ce jour par cette histoire, il décide de prendre la plume et de la raconter dans un livre. À la fin de ce livre, il pose la question qui, aujourd’hui encore, en raison de sa portée politique, philosophique et religieuse, mérite qu’on y réfléchisse : « ai-je eu raison ou ai-je eu tort ? ». Mais peut-on réellement pardonner l’impardonnable ? La question reste entière. À propos de la pièce : «La mégère apprivoisée » Adaptation et mise en scène de Frédérique Lazarini avec Sarah Biasini (Catarina), Cédric Colas (Petruchio), Maxime Lombard (Baptista), Pierre Einaudi (Lucientio), Guillaume Veyre (Tranio) scénographie et lumières François Cabanat costumes Dominique Bourde réalisation du film Bernard Malaterre avec Charlotte Durand-Raucher (Bianca), Didier Lesour (Le Prêtre), Hugo Petitier (Gremio), Jules Dalmas (Hortensio) assistante à la mise en scène Lydia Nicaud assistante à la création des costumes Emmanuelle Ballon La Mégère Apprivoisée est une pièce pleine de contradictions. Shakespeare donne ici le rôle titre à un personnage de femme profondément insoumise, résolument moderne, qui revendique le droit à la parole et à une certaine liberté. Non, Catarina ne se laisse pas faire. Elle est en rébellion contre toutes les autorités patriarcales de son temps. Et on serait tenté d’imaginer que Shakespeare est de son côté et qu’il nourrit de l’admiration pour sa « Mégère ». En revanche, il n’hésite pas à clore son histoire par un texte misogyne, assumé par une Catarina métamorphosée. Surprise ? Dans cette adaptation de La Mégère, il convient de faire apparaître entre les lignes que notre héroïne n’est pas dupe, qu’elle n’a pas baissé les armes. Ce discours, finalement par trop provocateur, peut devenir un jeu amoureux, un jeu érotique, un jeu social. Catarina devient alors la métaphore de l’actrice, elle endosse le rôle de la femme docile dans une relation complice et ludique avec son mari. Humour et jubilation sont de mise dans cette comédie haute en couleurs, empreinte d’une extraordinaire vitalité. Dans la mise en scène de Frédérique Lazarini, l’histoire se noue autour d’un cinéma ambulant sur la place d’un village, dans les années 50 en Italie. L’intrigue se déroule sur la scène et à l’écran pour mettre en exergue cette mise en abyme chère à Shakespeare, où chacun joue son rôle dans une vie qui a tout d’une fiction et d’un grand théâtre.
Aidan and Lindsay tuck into the epic battle between Katharina and Petruchio in Shakespeare's early comedy The Taming of the Shrew. In a play about breaking the spirit of a strong woman, the conversation here travels around feminism and the social order of Elizabethan England, Shakespeare-adjacent texts, philosophy, and questions of who really is the titular Shrew in this story? Join us for a spirited discussion that ends with our debate: Should the famous ending of the play be read/portrayed satirically? Notes: The Taming of A Shrew, which echoes Shakespeare so much people think it must be related to his work, is the focus of this overview by Dr. Michael Delahoyde of Washington State University. Zeffirelli's The Taming of the Shrew (1967) stars Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton and co-stars a number of popular character actors from the time (Michael York and Victor Spinetti, yo!) and is fun in parts and aggravating in parts but it's a lavish production. If you only watch one production of Shrew, let it be this one. Taming of the Shrew (1929) starring Mary Pickford and Douglas Fairbanks is available in its entirety on Dailymotion and we highly recommend checking it out for a unique take on this play! 10 Things I Hate About You is a fun '90s take on Shrew and it's worth a look for purely nostalgic reasons alone. It comes in the middle of this weird resurgence in popularity of Shakespeare's works in the last decade of the 20th century, and is a rather loose adaptation of the play, but if nothing else it's kind of a neat little film. Check it out! Our favourite Shakespearean editions, from the Folger Shakespeare Library, have put out a version of The Tamer Tamed online. "Local Elevator" by Kevin MacLeod is the song we sampled for our brief intermission early in the episode. Aidan misspoke when discussing our next play. Henry IV was actually written several years after Henry VI, and there are only two parts to that particular historical Henriad. We are in fact heading into the long discussion of Henry VIs - Parts 1, 2, and 3!
A new production of Kiss Me, Kate is on Broadway now. It features Cole Porter’s memorable music and Kelli O’Hara and Will Chase as Lilli Vanessi and Fred Graham, a bickering divorced couple thrown together when they’re booked to star in a production of Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew. But 1948’s Kiss Me, Kate also duplicates the sexism of the Shakespeare play at its center. You aren’t alone if you’re wondering, “Does Kiss Me, Kate work in 2019?” We asked Will Chase and Amanda Green. Chase (TV’s Nashville and Broadway’s Something Rotten) stars in the production as Fred Graham, Kiss Me, Kate’s Petruchio figure. Amanda Green is the Tony-nominated lyricist and composer who wrote additional material for the production, a key decision-maker when it came to updating the musical’s book and lyrics. Chase and Green talk to Barbara Bogaev about wrestling with Kiss Me, Kate treatment of women and finding the love at the heart of its script.
"I'm a maid mad to marry And will take double-quick Any Tom, Dick or Harry, Any Tom, Harry or Dick!" - Lois Lane / Bianca, in Cole Porter's Kiss Me, Kate We're back with episode 10! Today I explore the critical and theatrical history of The Taming of the Shrew, from folk tales to musicals, from the Victorians to vaudeville, from an overacting Christopher Sly to Hollywood's take on the rebel. Come join me! You can find me on Facebook, Twitter, or by email at podcastshakespeare@gmail.com. You can subscribe to the podcast at iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, or download direct from Libsyn. The Patreon campaign is up and running, with bonus Sonnet episodes! We also have a brand spanking new Spotify playlist, which will be updated as we work through the plays. Key links below. You can also visit the bibliography page here, which is a work in progress. Links mentioned: BBC's Upstart Crow Aarne-Thompson classification system for folklore narratives. The story of "Ledasha" 1550s ballad: “A Merry Jest of a Shrewd and Curst Wife Lapped in Morel’s Skin for Her Good Behaviour” George Gascoigne, Supposes Ovid, Metamorphoses 1601 anecdote about William "the Conqueror" Shakespeare John Fletcher, The Woman's Prize, or the Tamer Tamed (1611) The Enid Blyton Society John Lacy, Sauny the Scot; or, The Taming of the Shrew: A Comedy David Garrick, Catharine and Petruchio 1976 American Conservatory Theatre production on Youtube, starring Marc Singer and Fredi Olster Kiss Me Petruchio (1978) on Youtube The Taming of the Shrew (2012), Globe Theatre production on DVD, starring Samantha Spiro (Kate) and Simon Paisley Day (Petruchio) The Taming of the Shrew (1929), d: Sam Taylor, starring Mary Pickford (Katharina) and Douglas Fairbanks (Petruchio) on Dailymotion The Taming of the Shrew (1967), d: Franco Zeffirelli, starring Elizabeth Taylor (Kate) and Richard Burton (Petruchio) The Taming of the Shrew (1980), BBC, d: Jonathan Miller, starring Sarah Badel (Kate) and John Cleese (Petruchio) Vermeer’s music lesson - copied in Miller's production Pieter Janssens Elinga - Interior with Painter, Woman Reading and Maid Sweeping [1668] The Taming of the Shrew (1994) from Shakespeare: The Animated Tales on Dailymotion 10 Things I Hate About You (1999; d: Gil Junger), starring Julia Stiles (Kat) and Heath Ledger (Patrick) Atomic Shakespeare from Moonlighting, with Cybill Shepherd and Bruce Willis - cropped version on Youtube ShakespeaRe-Told: The Taming of the Shrew (2005; d: David Richards) Shakespearean Whodunnits (1997): Murder Mysteries based on the Bard, including The Taming of Lord Thomas Vinegar Girl (2016) by Anne Tyler, adapted from The Taming of the Shrew as part of the Hogarth Shakespeare series. Wolf-Ferrari, Sly (opera) - review of the 2002 Met Opera production starring Placido Domingo, at the New York Times Kiss Me Kate (1948) by Cole Porter - 1999 production on Youtube Art inspired by The Taming of the Shrew Music clips: Nino Rota, soundtrack to Zeffirelli's "The Taming of the Shrew", 1967 (Columbia Picutres, US / Italy) orchestra conducted by Carlo Savina -Nocturne -In the House of Petruchio Cole Porter, Kiss Me Kate, 2000 Broadway cast recording: Stanley Wayne Mathis (Paul) and company "Come, Kiss Me Kate" from Ross W. Duffin's Shakespeare's Songbook Luciano Michelini, ‘Frolic’, from Curb Your Enthusiasm, 2000 – present Hans Werner Henze, Royal Winter Music: First Sonata on Shakespearean Characters (1975-76), movement based on Richard of Gloucester Porter, Kiss Me Kate, 1999 London cast, Nancy Kathryn Anderson (Lois Lane / Bianca) and company Letters to Cleo, I Want You to Want Me, from 10 Things I Hate About You (1999) Porter, Kiss Me Kate, 2014 BBC Proms, Michael Jibson & James Doherty (Gangsters) Reference: Garner, Shirley Nelson. "The Taming of the Shrew: Inside or Outside the Joke?." "Bad" Shakespeare: Revaluations of the Shakespeare Canon. Ed. Maurice Charney. Fairleigh Dickinson University Press, 1988. p105-19.
Shana Cooper directed Taming of the Shrew at the Hudson Valley Shakespeare Festival this summer, a production that received rave reviews from the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal. Shana, an assistant professor at Northwestern University, discusses how she made this troublesome play work in our slightly more enlightened (hopefully) and evolving era. Featuring key commedia influences, a classic battle of the sexes play that's also a satire of same, being sold on the love story, the importance of clowns, the danger and absurdity of the patriarchy, one virtue of the Christopher Sly scenes, forging unknown and thorny paths, the importance of non-verbal text, radical and revolutionary individuals, and most importantly, finding alternatives to broken systems and masculine ideas of power. (Length 28:56) (Pictured: Liz Wisan and Biko Eisen-Martin as Kate and Petruchio in the Hudson Valley Shakespeare Festival production of Taming of the Shrew. Photo by T. Charles Erickson.)
Here is the renegade, the rebel heart, the iconoclast! Fearless and hotheaded, the 7 of Wands corresponds to the third decan of Leo, ruled by Mars. He is the lord of Valor, and his courage is that of the uphill battle. The adversaries are many - six against one! but glory and individual heroism are within grasp of his brute force. This is our first experience, in the minor arcana, of the creative and off-kilter energy of the number seven. Since the seventh sephira belongs to Venus, we explore her in her warrior aspect, as well as in the goddesses Babalon and Nike. And we tip a tattered hat to Shakespeare's rascal Petruchio, bent on conquest of his shrewish Katherine. To learn more about the suit of Wands, the world of Atziluth, the ordeals and quests of the number Seven, the color schemes of the cards, and so much else, be sure to visit us at www.patreon.com/fortuneswheelhouse. You can also shop for Fortune's Wheelhouse T-shirts, mugs, backpacks, stickers, and more at our RedBubble shop.
This week's episode of The Bard and the Bible Podcast pairs a short monologue by Petruchio from Act 5 of The Taming of the Shrew with Ecclesiastes 5:10-12 in the King James Version of the Bible.
JULIA NISH-LAPIDUS Julia is an actor, director, and producer, as well as a Co-Founder and Co-Artistic Director of Shakespeare BASH'd, where she has produced all of the company's productions. She has worked as the Managing Director of Common Boots Theatre and is now part of the team at The Theatre Centre. For Shakespeare BASH'd, Julia has directed The Comedy of Errors, and assistant directed The Changeling. She has also performed in many BASH'd productions, including The Taming of the Shrew, Romeo & Juliet, Macbeth, The Merry Wives of Windsor, Hamlet, Twelfth Night, and Volpone (staged reading).Selected Additional Credits: Talk to Me Like the Rain and Let Me Listen and This Property is Condemned (Director, The Playwright Project), Modern Love (Co-Creator, Next Stage), As You Like It (Text Coach, Theatre By the Bay), and as an actor OVER, See Bob Run (Theatre Caravel), reasons to the pretty (The Labute Cycle), The Forest (Red One Theatre Collective), Dublin Carol (Fly on the Wall). Julia is a member of the Advisory Board for the Canadian Stage GYM program and a graduate of the joint acting program at UofT and Sheridan College.JAMES WALLIS James has been a Shakespeare fan all his life, having performed with Resurgence Theatre Company as a teenager and again as a professional later in his career.After graduating from Ryerson Theatre School, James jumped right into the big bad world of commercial work and film & television acting. He has been seen in a number of national commercials, including spots for Boston Pizza, Honda, and Expedia. Also, he has appeared on The Jon Dore Show, XIII: The Series and in a number of feature films including: And Now A Word From Our Sponsors and The Movie Out Here.In 2010, James co-founded Shakespeare BASH’d with his wife, Julia. For the company, James has directed staged readings of Romeo and Juliet (2010), A Midsummer Night’s Dream (2011), Edward II (2015), and Volpone (2017), as well as the full productions of Romeo & Juliet, Love's Labour's Lost, Macbeth, The Merry Wives of Windsor, and Twelfth Night. He played Petruchio in the company's Best of Fringe winning production of The Taming of the Shrew in 2012 and the remount in 2015, and played Benedick in their sold-out production of Much Ado About Nothing in the 2013 Toronto Fringe. In addition, here are some of James’ selected theatre credits: A Midsummer Nights’ Dream, Shakespeare’s Magic, and The Taming of the Shrew (Theatre by the Bay), Danny, King of the Basement (Roseneath Theatre, US Tour), Sleeping Beauty (Sudbury Theatre Centre), Paradise by the River (Shadowpath Theatre).James just completed his second season at the Stratford Festival as part of the Michael Langham Workshop for Classical Directing. There he has assistant directed Macbeth, Bunny, and Romeo and Juliet.Shakespeare BASH'd presents Richard III by William ShakespeareFebruary 6-11, 2018 at the Monarch Tavern (12 Clinton St)Shakespeare's epic drama about a powerful villain manipulating his way to the crown is given a barroom staging by Shakespeare BASH'd. You don't want to miss this bare-bones, visceral, and all too relevant production.Tickets on sale now at www.shakespearebashd.com $20 online $25 at the door (pending availability)SHOWTIMES: Tuesday, February 6 - 7:30pm Wednesday, February 7 - 7:30pm Thursday, February 8 - 7:30pm Friday, February 9 - 7:30pm Saturday, February 10 - 2:00pm Saturday, February 10 - 7:30pm Sunday, February 11 - 2:00pmDirected by Julia Nish-LapidusFeaturing: Cosette Derome, Jade Douris, Jennifer Dzialoszynski, Suzette McCanny, Shalyn McFaul, Drew O’Hara, Trevor Pease, Catherine Rainville, James Wallis, Kelly Wong, Joseph ZitaAssociate Director: Megan Miles Stage Manager: Christopher Brackett Fight Director: Nate Bitton Movement Coach: Brad Cook Marketing Design: Kyle PurcellWebsite: www.shakespearebashd.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ShakespeareBASHd/ Twitter: @ShakesBASHd Instagram: @ShakesBASHdStageworthy:http://www.stageworthypodcast.com Twitter @stageworthyPod Facebook: http://facebook.com/stageworthyPod
Some of Petruchio's words to Kate in The Taming of the Shrew are paired with words attributed to King Solomon from Ecclesiastes 5:10-12, in the King James Version of the Bible.
On today’s podcast we discussed four poems, all part of a “polyvalent” poetry series by Jayson Iwen. These poems were unique because they could be read two different ways, horizontally and vertically. Hi and welcome to Episode 15 of the PBQ’s Slush pile. On today’s podcast we discussed four poems, all part of a “polyvalent” poetry series by Jayson Iwen. These poems were unique because they could be read two different ways, horizontally and vertically. Jayson lived in Beirut, Lebanon for four years where he served as the “Hare-Raiser” for the Beirut Tarboush Hash House Harriers (yeah, we had to look it up, too). He wrote his first two books on a Smith Corona WS250 when he was in high school, and dropped out of pre-med to become a writer. In college he played Petruchio in an S&M, black box version of Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew (eat your heart out E.L. James). You can check out Jayson’s website here; you’ll want to, after your hear and read these poems. We started with “.1.4.1,” which was the first in the series of “polyvalent” poetry. We started by reading the poem vertically and then moved on to horizontally. We were impressed with the way in which the meaning of the poem became clearer when we read the poem horizontally, like magic. Tim was able to connect with the feelings associated with new parenthood, while Jason questioned our ability to trust such an unconventional voice. We decided to move on and read all of the poems before we voted, so it was on to “.1.4.2.” We found again that the horizontal version was more accessible to us, and admired the strong images the author’s language conjured. Next was “.1.4.3,” and we really dug the “creepy” tone that progressed through the first two poems to this one, and when we moved on to “.1.4.4,” we looked forward to seeing where the story that was woven through the first three poems went. You’ll have to listen to see which poems we ultimately accepted from the series! Don’t forget to rate and subscribe on our iTunes, then let us know what you thought on our podcast Facebook page. Read on! Present at the Editorial Table: Kathleen Volk Miller Marion Wrenn Tim Fitts Jason Schneiderman Caitlin McLaughlin Production Engineer: Joe Zang PBQ Box Score: 3:4 --------------------------- .1.4.1 You have descended from animals Who descended from angels Who alone have descended From the darkness of their own choice Where nothing holds its shape for long Hold out your hand And feel for rain The pain of sex My great grandmother taught my grand With a knife My grandfather taught my uncle Respect with a pitch fork No one arrives at insanity alone It’s a social conclusion Like finding the baby Waiving goodbye from the top of the stairs .1.4.2 In the night you lean Over the baby, to make sure it’s okay The baby wakes terrified A dark animal shape looms From the fear within you Modeling itself in the child The only way out of possession To dispossess your thought, you remember You’ve been so baked you couldn’t stand No one ever mentioned the crystal THC With which they’d laced the pot Those nights were long affairs Watching the submarine calm of the ceiling In the extra bedroom Watching fire light flicker on the tent flap Listening to everything speak your name .1.4.3 You might dream of a poolside party Where you bump into an old classmate You thought had died years before With whom you’d never spoken Our military was so strong It would break its own neck She said I’ll be in the last room on the left And left You might wake to find the baby Sitting up in the dark Staring at a shape in the moonlight Why did you never come to me It says You might have found me The high & holy center of the Earth .1.4.4 I was my mother’s will Sent out into the world For bread or cheese or meat A vapor trail unforming Against the morning light The sound of a struck bell Slipping into the background To live beyond scrutiny Your glorious brain, my little humon Is a globule of fat Dangling from the nerve tree We call universe That’s right, son Daddy’s drinking again His life is a dead end That tastes like mother’s cup
In Shakespeare’s “The Taming of the Shrew,” the indelible Kate and Petruchio—a feisty, ferocious fiancé and her would-be “tamer”—together discover something truly amazing and surprising. They discover that even after 400 years, people will see a show about two people fighting with each other until they finally fall in love. Kate and Petruchio are amongst the most famous characters in western theatrical literature, and despite the datedness of the play, and the imbedded minefield of gender issues that are always part of the process of staging the show for modern audiences; people keep coming to see it. Why? Why not? The politics of love are not easy today, so why not look at a time when they were even more complex, and see if maybe we’ve learned anything. Besides, part of the pleasure of sitting down to a fresh production of such a well-known play is seeing if the cast, crew, and director will make it somehow seem new, or unpredictable, or surprising—or maybe fail miserably in the attempt. That’s always a possibility. I am happy to report that in Curtain Theatre’s rollicking outdoor production—free to the public and running weekends in the Old Mill Park in Mill Valley—the only real failure on display were those few unhappy audience members who failed to bring a sweater or coat, and were visibly shivering in the second act when the Mill Valley fog began rolling in. As for the production itself, it’s a blast. There are plenty of fresh ideas, uniformly strong performances, a boatload of clever theatrical flourishes, and a few moments of true genius. The fluid, fast-paced direction by Carl Jordan—here tackling Shakespeare for his first time—results in a buoyant, bouncy fluff-ball of a play, with a stunningly high laugh-to-minute ratio, and gallons of charm and visual razzle-dazzle The setting and basic attire of the production are fairly traditional, with a live band playing renaissance tunes before the show, but director Jordan lets us know early on that he will be taking a decidedly playful tone with the material, beginning with an original pop-rock-inspired tune that essentially stands as a prologue. In this production, people do tend to burst into song, tossing out snippets of popular rock songs, a few lovely originals by music director Don Clark, and one hilariously heartbreaking rendition of A Hundred Bottles of Beer on the Wall. Kate—a splendidly three-dimensional Melissa Claire—makes her initial appearance wielding a chainsaw, stalking across the stage while belting out the lyrics of George Thorogood’s Bad to the Bone. Petruchio—played by an excellent Alan Coyne—is not the brutish bully he is often depicted as, but a goofy sweetheart with a giddy knack for improvisational madness, and questionable taste in codpieces. The marvelous ensemble is too large to give proper credit to all, but notable standouts include a brilliant Heather Cherry as Petruchio’s frazzled servant Grumio, Tom Reilly as Kate’s gracefully befuddled father, Juliana Lustenader as Kate’s shallow-but-winsome sister, Steve Beecroft as the crafty servant Tranio, and an amiably silly Seth Dahlgren as Hortensio, a wildly persistent suitor to Bianca. And … did I mention the show is free? After 16 years, Curtain Theatre is still managing to exist solely on the donations audiences happily drop in the baskets at the end of the show. And trust me—this one is well worth paying to see. ‘Taming of the Shrew’ runs Saturdays, Sundays and Labor Day, through Sept. 13, at Old Mill Park Amphitheater in Mill Valley. All shows 2:00 p.m. Free. www.curtaintheatre.org
ACT III.SCENE II. Padua. Before BAPTISTA'S houseEnter BAPTISTA, GREMIO, TRANIO as LUCENTIO, KATHERINA, BIANCA,LUCENTIO as CAMBIO, and ATTENDANTS BAPTISTA. [To TRANIO] Signior Lucentio, this is the 'pointed day That Katherine and Petruchio should be married, And yet we hear not of our son-in-law. What will be said? What mockery will it be To want the bridegroom when the priest attends To speak the ceremonial rites of marriage! What says Lucentio to this shame of ours? KATHERINA. No shame but mine; I must, forsooth, be forc'd To give my hand, oppos'd against my heart, Unto a mad-brain rudesby, full of spleen, Who woo'd in haste and means to wed at leisure. I told you, I, he was a frantic fool, Hiding his bitter jests in blunt behaviour; And, to be noted for a merry man, He'll woo a thousand, 'point the day of marriage, Make friends invited, and proclaim the banns; Yet never means to wed where he hath woo'd. Now must the world point at poor Katherine, And say 'Lo, there is mad Petruchio's wife, If it would please him come and marry her!' TRANIO. Patience, good Katherine, and Baptista too. Upon my life, Petruchio means but well, Whatever fortune stays him from his word. Though he be blunt, I know him passing wise; Though he be merry, yet withal he's honest. KATHERINA. Would Katherine had never seen him though! Exit, weeping, followed by BIANCA and others BAPTISTA. Go, girl, I cannot blame thee now to weep, For such an injury would vex a very saint; Much more a shrew of thy impatient humour.Enter BIONDELLO Master, master! News, and such old news as you never heard of! BAPTISTA. Is it new and old too? How may that be? BIONDELLO. Why, is it not news to hear of Petruchio's coming? BAPTISTA. Is he come? BIONDELLO. Why, no, sir. BAPTISTA. What then? BIONDELLO. He is coming. BAPTISTA. When will he be here? BIONDELLO. When he stands where I am and sees you there. TRANIO. But, say, what to thine old news? BIONDELLO. Why, Petruchio is coming- in a new hat and an old jerkin; a pair of old breeches thrice turn'd; a pair of boots that have been candle-cases, one buckled, another lac'd; an old rusty sword ta'en out of the town armoury, with a broken hilt, and chapeless; with two broken points; his horse hipp'd, with an old motley saddle and stirrups of no kindred; besides, possess'd with the glanders and like to mose in the chine, troubled with the lampass, infected with the fashions, full of windgalls, sped with spavins, rayed with the yellows, past cure of the fives, stark spoil'd with the staggers, begnawn with the bots, sway'd in the back and shoulder-shotten, near-legg'd before, and with a half-cheek'd bit, and a head-stall of sheep's leather which, being restrained to keep him from stumbling, hath been often burst, and now repaired with knots; one girth six times piec'd, and a woman's crupper of velure, which hath two letters for her name fairly set down in studs, and here and there piec'd with pack-thread. BAPTISTA. Who comes with him? BIONDELLO. O, sir, his lackey, for all the world caparison'd like the horse- with a linen stock on one leg and a kersey boot-hose on the other, gart'red with a red and blue list; an old hat, and the humour of forty fancies prick'd in't for a feather; a monster, a very monster in apparel, and not like a Christian footboy or a gentleman's lackey. TRANIO. 'Tis some odd humour pricks him to this fashion; Yet oftentimes lie goes but mean-apparell'd. BAPTISTA. I am glad he's come, howsoe'er he comes. BIONDELLO. Why, sir, he comes not. BAPTISTA. Didst thou not say he comes? BIONDELLO. Who? that Petruchio came? BAPTISTA. Ay, that Petruchio came. BIONDELLO. No, sir; I say his horse comes with him on his back. BAPTISTA. Why, that's all one. BIONDELLO. Nay, by Saint Jamy, I hold you a penny, A horse and a man Is more than one, And yet not many.Enter PETRUCHIO and GRUMIO PETRUCHIO. Come, where be these gallants? Who's at home? BAPTISTA. You are welcome, sir. PETRUCHIO. And yet I come not well. BAPTISTA. And yet you halt not. TRANIO. Not so well apparell'd As I wish you were. PETRUCHIO. Were it better, I should rush in thus. But where is Kate? Where is my lovely bride? How does my father? Gentles, methinks you frown; And wherefore gaze this goodly company As if they saw some wondrous monument, Some comet or unusual prodigy? BAPTISTA. Why, sir, you know this is your wedding-day. First were we sad, fearing you would not come; Now sadder, that you come so unprovided. Fie, doff this habit, shame to your estate, An eye-sore to our solemn festival! TRANIO. And tell us what occasion of import Hath all so long detain'd you from your wife, And sent you hither so unlike yourself? PETRUCHIO. Tedious it were to tell, and harsh to hear; Sufficeth I am come to keep my word, Though in some part enforced to digress, Which at more leisure I will so excuse As you shall well be satisfied withal. But where is Kate? I stay too long from her; The morning wears, 'tis time we were at church. TRANIO. See not your bride in these unreverent robes; Go to my chamber, put on clothes of mine. PETRUCHIO. Not I, believe me; thus I'll visit her. BAPTISTA. But thus, I trust, you will not marry her. PETRUCHIO. Good sooth, even thus; therefore ha' done with words; To me she's married, not unto my clothes. Could I repair what she will wear in me As I can change these poor accoutrements, 'Twere well for Kate and better for myself. But what a fool am I to chat with you, When I should bid good-morrow to my bride And seal the title with a lovely kiss! Exeunt PETRUCHIO and GRUMIO TRANIO. He hath some meaning in his mad attire.
Re-enter BAPTISTA, GREMIO, and TRANIO PETRUCHIO. Here comes your father. Never make denial; I must and will have Katherine to my wife. BAPTISTA. Now, Signior Petruchio, how speed you with my daughter? PETRUCHIO. How but well, sir? how but well? It were impossible I should speed amiss. BAPTISTA. Why, how now, daughter Katherine, in your dumps? KATHERINA. Call you me daughter? Now I promise you You have show'd a tender fatherly regard To wish me wed to one half lunatic, A mad-cap ruffian and a swearing Jack, That thinks with oaths to face the matter out. PETRUCHIO. Father, 'tis thus: yourself and all the world That talk'd of her have talk'd amiss of her. If she be curst, it is for policy, For,she's not froward, but modest as the dove; She is not hot, but temperate as the morn; For patience she will prove a second Grissel, And Roman Lucrece for her chastity. And, to conclude, we have 'greed so well together That upon Sunday is the wedding-day. KATHERINA. I'll see thee hang'd on Sunday first. GREMIO. Hark, Petruchio; she says she'll see thee hang'd first. TRANIO. Is this your speeding? Nay, then good-night our part! PETRUCHIO. Be patient, gentlemen. I choose her for myself; If she and I be pleas'd, what's that to you? 'Tis bargain'd 'twixt us twain, being alone, That she shall still be curst in company. I tell you 'tis incredible to believe. How much she loves me- O, the kindest Kate! She hung about my neck, and kiss on kiss She vied so fast, protesting oath on oath, That in a twink she won me to her love. O, you are novices! 'Tis a world to see, How tame, when men and women are alone, A meacock wretch can make the curstest shrew. Give me thy hand, Kate; I will unto Venice, To buy apparel 'gainst the wedding-day. Provide the feast, father, and bid the guests; I will be sure my Katherine shall be fine. BAPTISTA. I know not what to say; but give me your hands. God send you joy, Petruchio! 'Tis a match. GREMIO, TRANIO. Amen, say we; we will be witnesses. PETRUCHIO. Father, and wife, and gentlemen, adieu. I will to Venice; Sunday comes apace; We will have rings and things, and fine array; And kiss me, Kate; we will be married a Sunday. Exeunt PETRUCHIO and KATHERINA severally GREMIO. Was ever match clapp'd up so suddenly? BAPTISTA. Faith, gentlemen, now I play a merchant's part, And venture madly on a desperate mart. TRANIO. 'Twas a commodity lay fretting by you; 'Twill bring you gain, or perish on the seas. BAPTISTA. The gain I seek is quiet in the match. GREMIO. No doubt but he hath got a quiet catch. But now, Baptista, to your younger daughter: Now is the day we long have looked for; I am your neighbour, and was suitor first. TRANIO. And I am one that love Bianca more Than words can witness or your thoughts can guess. GREMIO. Youngling, thou canst not love so dear as I. TRANIO. Greybeard, thy love doth freeze. GREMIO. But thine doth fry. Skipper, stand back; 'tis age that nourisheth. TRANIO. But youth in ladies' eyes that flourisheth. BAPTISTA. Content you, gentlemen; I will compound this strife. 'Tis deeds must win the prize, and he of both That can assure my daughter greatest dower Shall have my Bianca's love. Say, Signior Gremio, what can you assure her? GREMIO. First, as you know, my house within the city Is richly furnished with plate and gold, Basins and ewers to lave her dainty hands; My hangings all of Tyrian tapestry; In ivory coffers I have stuff'd my crowns; In cypress chests my arras counterpoints, Costly apparel, tents, and canopies, Fine linen, Turkey cushions boss'd with pearl, Valance of Venice gold in needle-work; Pewter and brass, and all things that belongs To house or housekeeping. Then at my farm I have a hundred milch-kine to the pail, Six score fat oxen standing in my stalls, And all things answerable to this portion. Myself am struck in years, I must confess; And if I die to-morrow this is hers, If whilst I live she will be only mine. TRANIO. That 'only' came well in. Sir, list to me: I am my father's heir and only son; If I may have your daughter to my wife, I'll leave her houses three or four as good Within rich Pisa's walls as any one Old Signior Gremio has in Padua; Besides two thousand ducats by the year Of fruitful land, all which shall be her jointure. What, have I pinch'd you, Signior Gremio? GREMIO. Two thousand ducats by the year of land! [Aside] My land amounts not to so much in all.- That she shall have, besides an argosy That now is lying in Marseilles road. What, have I chok'd you with an argosy? TRANIO. Gremio, 'tis known my father hath no less Than three great argosies, besides two galliasses, And twelve tight galleys. These I will assure her, And twice as much whate'er thou off'rest next. GREMIO. Nay, I have off'red all; I have no more; And she can have no more than all I have; If you like me, she shall have me and mine. TRANIO. Why, then the maid is mine from all the world By your firm promise; Gremio is out-vied. BAPTISTA. I must confess your offer is the best; And let your father make her the assurance, She is your own. Else, you must pardon me; If you should die before him, where's her dower? TRANIO. That's but a cavil; he is old, I young. GREMIO. And may not young men die as well as old? BAPTISTA. Well, gentlemen, I am thus resolv'd: on Sunday next you know My daughter Katherine is to be married; Now, on the Sunday following shall Bianca Be bride to you, if you make this assurance; If not, to Signior Gremio. And so I take my leave, and thank you both. GREMIO. Adieu, good neighbour. Exit BAPTISTA Now, I fear thee not. Sirrah young gamester, your father were a fool To give thee all, and in his waning age Set foot under thy table. Tut, a toy! An old Italian fox is not so kind, my boy. Exit TRANIO. A vengeance on your crafty withered hide! Yet I have fac'd it with a card of ten. 'Tis in my head to do my master good: I see no reason but suppos'd Lucentio Must get a father, call'd suppos'd Vincentio; And that's a wonder- fathers commonly Do get their children; but in this case of wooing A child shall get a sire, if I fail not of my cunning.Exit
Exit SERVANT leading HORTENSIO carrying the lute and LUCENTIO with the books BAPTISTA. We will go walk a little in the orchard, And then to dinner. You are passing welcome, And so I pray you all to think yourselves. PETRUCHIO. Signior Baptista, my business asketh haste, And every day I cannot come to woo. You knew my father well, and in him me, Left solely heir to all his lands and goods, Which I have bettered rather than decreas'd. Then tell me, if I get your daughter's love, What dowry shall I have with her to wife? BAPTISTA. After my death, the one half of my lands And, in possession, twenty thousand crowns. PETRUCHIO. And for that dowry, I'll assure her of Her widowhood, be it that she survive me, In all my lands and leases whatsoever. Let specialities be therefore drawn between us, That covenants may be kept on either hand. BAPTISTA. Ay, when the special thing is well obtain'd, That is, her love; for that is all in all. PETRUCHIO. Why, that is nothing; for I tell you, father, I am as peremptory as she proud-minded; And where two raging fires meet together, They do consume the thing that feeds their fury. Though little fire grows great with little wind, Yet extreme gusts will blow out fire and all. So I to her, and so she yields to me; For I am rough, and woo not like a babe. BAPTISTA. Well mayst thou woo, and happy be thy speed But be thou arm'd for some unhappy words. PETRUCHIO. Ay, to the proof, as mountains are for winds, That shake not though they blow perpetually.Re-enter HORTENSIO, with his head broke BAPTISTA. How now, my friend! Why dost thou look so pale? HORTENSIO. For fear, I promise you, if I look pale. BAPTISTA. What, will my daughter prove a good musician? HORTENSIO. I think she'll sooner prove a soldier: Iron may hold with her, but never lutes. BAPTISTA. Why, then thou canst not break her to the lute? HORTENSIO. Why, no; for she hath broke the lute to me. I did but tell her she mistook her frets, And bow'd her hand to teach her fingering, When, with a most impatient devilish spirit, 'Frets, call you these?' quoth she 'I'll fume with them.' And with that word she struck me on the head, And through the instrument my pate made way; And there I stood amazed for a while, As on a pillory, looking through the lute, While she did call me rascal fiddler And twangling Jack, with twenty such vile terms, As she had studied to misuse me so. PETRUCHIO. Now, by the world, it is a lusty wench; I love her ten times more than e'er I did. O, how I long to have some chat with her! BAPTISTA. Well, go with me, and be not so discomfited; Proceed in practice with my younger daughter; She's apt to learn, and thankful for good turns. Signior Petruchio, will you go with us, Or shall I send my daughter Kate to you? PETRUCHIO. I pray you do. Exeunt all but PETRUCHIO I'll attend her here, And woo her with some spirit when she comes. Say that she rail; why, then I'll tell her plain She sings as sweetly as a nightingale. Say that she frown; I'll say she looks as clear As morning roses newly wash'd with dew. Say she be mute, and will not speak a word; Then I'll commend her volubility, And say she uttereth piercing eloquence. If she do bid me pack, I'll give her thanks, As though she bid me stay by her a week; If she deny to wed, I'll crave the day When I shall ask the banns, and when be married. But here she comes; :Lnd.now, Petruchio, speak.Enter KATHERINA Good morrow, Kate- for that's your name, I hear. KATHERINA. Well have you heard, but something hard of hearing: They call me Katherine that do talk of me. PETRUCHIO. You lie, in faith, for you are call'd plain Kate, And bonny Kate, and sometimes Kate the curst; But, Kate, the prettiest Kate in Christendom, Kate of Kate Hall, my super-dainty Kate, For dainties are all Kates, and therefore, Kate, Take this of me, Kate of my consolation- Hearing thy mildness prais'd in every town, Thy virtues spoke of, and thy beauty sounded, Yet not so deeply as to thee belongs, Myself am mov'd to woo thee for my wife. KATHERINA. Mov'd! in good time! Let him that mov'd you hither Remove you hence. I knew you at the first You were a moveable. PETRUCHIO. Why, what's a moveable? KATHERINA. A join'd-stool. PETRUCHIO. Thou hast hit it. Come, sit on me. KATHERINA. Asses are made to bear, and so are you. PETRUCHIO. Women are made to bear, and so are you. KATHERINA. No such jade as you, if me you mean. PETRUCHIO. Alas, good Kate, I will not burden thee! For, knowing thee to be but young and light- KATHERINA. Too light for such a swain as you to catch; And yet as heavy as my weight should be. PETRUCHIO. Should be! should- buzz! KATHERINA. Well ta'en, and like a buzzard. PETRUCHIO. O, slow-wing'd turtle, shall a buzzard take thee? KATHERINA. Ay, for a turtle, as he takes a buzzard. PETRUCHIO. Come, come, you wasp; i' faith, you are too angry. KATHERINA. If I be waspish, best beware my sting. PETRUCHIO. My remedy is then to pluck it out. KATHERINA. Ay, if the fool could find it where it lies. PETRUCHIO. Who knows not where a wasp does wear his sting? In his tail. KATHERINA. In his tongue. PETRUCHIO. Whose tongue? KATHERINA. Yours, if you talk of tales; and so farewell. PETRUCHIO. What, with my tongue in your tail? Nay, come again, Good Kate; I am a gentleman. KATHERINA. That I'll try. [She strikes him] PETRUCHIO. I swear I'll cuff you, if you strike again. KATHERINA. So may you lose your arms. If you strike me, you are no gentleman; And if no gentleman, why then no arms. PETRUCHIO. A herald, Kate? O, put me in thy books! KATHERINA. What is your crest- a coxcomb? PETRUCHIO. A combless cock, so Kate will be my hen. KATHERINA. No cock of mine: you crow too like a craven. PETRUCHIO. Nay, come, Kate, come; you must not look so sour. KATHERINA. It is my fashion, when I see a crab. PETRUCHIO. Why, here's no crab; and therefore look not sour. KATHERINA. There is, there is. PETRUCHIO. Then show it me. KATHERINA. Had I a glass I would. PETRUCHIO. What, you mean my face? KATHERINA. Well aim'd of such a young one. PETRUCHIO. Now, by Saint George, I am too young for you. KATHERINA. Yet you are wither'd. PETRUCHIO. 'Tis with cares. KATHERINA. I care not. PETRUCHIO. Nay, hear you, Kate- in sooth, you scape not so. KATHERINA. I chafe you, if I tarry; let me go. PETRUCHIO. No, not a whit; I find you passing gentle. 'Twas told me you were rough, and coy, and sullen, And now I find report a very liar; For thou art pleasant, gamesome, passing courteous, But slow in speech, yet sweet as springtime flowers. Thou canst not frown, thou canst not look askance, Nor bite the lip, as angry wenches will, Nor hast thou pleasure to be cross in talk; But thou with mildness entertain'st thy wooers; With gentle conference, soft and affable. Why does the world report that Kate doth limp? O sland'rous world! Kate like the hazel-twig Is straight and slender, and as brown in hue As hazel-nuts, and sweeter than the kernels. O, let me see thee walk. Thou dost not halt. KATHERINA. Go, fool, and whom thou keep'st command. PETRUCHIO. Did ever Dian so become a grove As Kate this chamber with her princely gait? O, be thou Dian, and let her be Kate; And then let Kate be chaste, and Dian sportful! KATHERINA. Where did you study all this goodly speech? PETRUCHIO. It is extempore, from my mother wit. KATHERINA. A witty mother! witless else her son. PETRUCHIO. Am I not wise? KATHERINA. Yes, keep you warm. PETRUCHIO. Marry, so I mean, sweet Katherine, in thy bed. And therefore, setting all this chat aside, Thus in plain terms: your father hath consented That you shall be my wife your dowry greed on; And will you, nill you, I will marry you. Now, Kate, I am a husband for your turn; For, by this light, whereby I see thy beauty, Thy beauty that doth make me like thee well, Thou must be married to no man but me; For I am he am born to tame you, Kate, And bring you from a wild Kate to a Kate Conformable as other household Kates.Re-enter BAPTISTA, GREMIO, and TRANIO Here comes your father. Never make denial; I must and will have Katherine to my wife. BAPTISTA. Now, Signior Petruchio, how speed you with my daughter? PETRUCHIO. How but well, sir? how but well? It were impossible I should speed amiss.
ACT Il. SCENE I. Padua. BAPTISTA'S houseEnter KATHERINA and BIANCA BIANCA. Good sister, wrong me not, nor wrong yourself, To make a bondmaid and a slave of me- That I disdain; but for these other gawds, Unbind my hands, I'll pull them off myself, Yea, all my raiment, to my petticoat; Or what you will command me will I do, So well I know my duty to my elders. KATHERINA. Of all thy suitors here I charge thee tell Whom thou lov'st best. See thou dissemble not. BIANCA. Believe me, sister, of all the men alive I never yet beheld that special face Which I could fancy more than any other. KATHERINA. Minion, thou liest. Is't not Hortensio? BIANCA. If you affect him, sister, here I swear I'll plead for you myself but you shall have him. KATHERINA. O then, belike, you fancy riches more: You will have Gremio to keep you fair. BIANCA. Is it for him you do envy me so? Nay, then you jest; and now I well perceive You have but jested with me all this while. I prithee, sister Kate, untie my hands. KATHERINA. [Strikes her] If that be jest, then an the rest was so.Enter BAPTISTA BAPTISTA. Why, how now, dame! Whence grows this insolence? Bianca, stand aside- poor girl! she weeps. [He unbinds her] Go ply thy needle; meddle not with her. For shame, thou hilding of a devilish spirit, Why dost thou wrong her that did ne'er wrong thee? When did she cross thee with a bitter word? KATHERINA. Her silence flouts me, and I'll be reveng'd. [Flies after BIANCA] BAPTISTA. What, in my sight? Bianca, get thee in. Exit BIANCA KATHERINA. What, will you not suffer me? Nay, now I see She is your treasure, she must have a husband; I must dance bare-foot on her wedding-day, And for your love to her lead apes in hell. Talk not to me; I will go sit and weep, Till I can find occasion of revenge. Exit KATHERINA BAPTISTA. Was ever gentleman thus griev'd as I? But who comes here? Enter GREMIO, with LUCENTIO in the habit of a mean man; PETRUCHIO, with HORTENSIO as a musician; and TRANIO, as LUCENTIO, with his boy, BIONDELLO, bearing a lute and books GREMIO. Good morrow, neighbour Baptista. BAPTISTA. Good morrow, neighbour Gremio. God save you, gentlemen! PETRUCHIO. And you, good sir! Pray, have you not a daughter Call'd Katherina, fair and virtuous? BAPTISTA. I have a daughter, sir, call'd Katherina. GREMIO. You are too blunt; go to it orderly. PETRUCHIO. You wrong me, Signior Gremio; give me leave. I am a gentleman of Verona, sir, That, hearing of her beauty and her wit, Her affability and bashful modesty, Her wondrous qualities and mild behaviour, Am bold to show myself a forward guest Within your house, to make mine eye the witness Of that report which I so oft have heard. And, for an entrance to my entertainment, I do present you with a man of mine, [Presenting HORTENSIO] Cunning in music and the mathematics, To instruct her fully in those sciences, Whereof I know she is not ignorant. Accept of him, or else you do me wrong- His name is Licio, born in Mantua. BAPTISTA. Y'are welcome, sir, and he for your good sake; But for my daughter Katherine, this I know, She is not for your turn, the more my grief. PETRUCHIO. I see you do not mean to part with her; Or else you like not of my company. BAPTISTA. Mistake me not; I speak but as I find. Whence are you, sir? What may I call your name? PETRUCHIO. Petruchio is my name, Antonio's son, A man well known throughout all Italy. BAPTISTA. I know him well; you are welcome for his sake. GREMIO. Saving your tale, Petruchio, I pray, Let us that are poor petitioners speak too. Bacare! you are marvellous forward. PETRUCHIO. O, pardon me, Signior Gremio! I would fain be doing. GREMIO. I doubt it not, sir; but you will curse your wooing. Neighbour, this is a gift very grateful, I am sure of it. To express the like kindness, myself, that have been more kindly beholding to you than any, freely give unto you this young scholar [Presenting LUCENTIO] that hath been long studying at Rheims; as cunning in Greek, Latin, and other languages, as the other in music and mathematics. His name is Cambio. Pray accept his service. BAPTISTA. A thousand thanks, Signior Gremio. Welcome, good Cambio. [To TRANIO] But, gentle sir, methinks you walk like a stranger. May I be so bold to know the cause of your coming? TRANIO. Pardon me, sir, the boldness is mine own That, being a stranger in this city here, Do make myself a suitor to your daughter, Unto Bianca, fair and virtuous. Nor is your firm resolve unknown to me In the preferment of the eldest sister. This liberty is all that I request- That, upon knowledge of my parentage, I may have welcome 'mongst the rest that woo, And free access and favour as the rest. And toward the education of your daughters I here bestow a simple instrument, And this small packet of Greek and Latin books. If you accept them, then their worth is great. BAPTISTA. Lucentio is your name? Of whence, I pray? TRANIO. Of Pisa, sir; son to Vincentio. BAPTISTA. A mighty man of Pisa. By report I know him well. You are very welcome, sir. Take you the lute, and you the set of books; You shall go see your pupils presently. Holla, within!Enter a SERVANT Sirrah, lead these gentlemen To my daughters; and tell them both These are their tutors. Bid them use them well. Exit SERVANT leading HORTENSIO carrying the lute and LUCENTIO with the books
GRUMIO. Will he woo her? Ay, or I'll hang her. PETRUCHIO. Why came I hither but to that intent? Think you a little din can daunt mine ears? Have I not in my time heard lions roar? Have I not heard the sea, puff'd up with winds, Rage like an angry boar chafed with sweat? Have I not heard great ordnance in the field, And heaven's artillery thunder in the skies? Have I not in a pitched battle heard Loud 'larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets' clang? And do you tell me of a woman's tongue, That gives not half so great a blow to hear As will a chestnut in a fariner's fire? Tush! tush! fear boys with bugs. GRUMIO. For he fears none. GREMIO. Hortensio, hark: This gentleman is happily arriv'd, My mind presumes, for his own good and ours. HORTENSIO. I promis'd we would be contributors And bear his charge of wooing, whatsoe'er. GREMIO. And so we will- provided that he win her. GRUMIO. I would I were as sure of a good dinner.Enter TRANIO, bravely apparelled as LUCENTIO, and BIONDELLO TRANIO. Gentlemen, God save you! If I may be bold, Tell me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way To the house of Signior Baptista Minola? BIONDELLO. He that has the two fair daughters; is't he you mean? TRANIO. Even he, Biondello. GREMIO. Hark you, sir, you mean not her to- TRANIO. Perhaps him and her, sir; what have you to do? PETRUCHIO. Not her that chides, sir, at any hand, I pray. TRANIO. I love no chiders, sir. Biondello, let's away. LUCENTIO. [Aside] Well begun, Tranio. HORTENSIO. Sir, a word ere you go. Are you a suitor to the maid you talk of, yea or no? TRANIO. And if I be, sir, is it any offence? GREMIO. No; if without more words you will get you hence. TRANIO. Why, sir, I pray, are not the streets as free For me as for you? GREMIO. But so is not she. TRANIO. For what reason, I beseech you? GREMIO. For this reason, if you'll know, That she's the choice love of Signior Gremio. HORTENSIO. That she's the chosen of Signior Hortensio. TRANIO. Softly, my masters! If you be gentlemen, Do me this right- hear me with patience. Baptista is a noble gentleman, To whom my father is not all unknown, And, were his daughter fairer than she is, She may more suitors have, and me for one. Fair Leda's daughter had a thousand wooers; Then well one more may fair Bianca have; And so she shall: Lucentio shall make one, Though Paris came in hope to speed alone. GREMIO. What, this gentleman will out-talk us all! LUCENTIO. Sir, give him head; I know he'll prove a jade. PETRUCHIO. Hortensio, to what end are all these words? HORTENSIO. Sir, let me be so bold as ask you, Did you yet ever see Baptista's daughter? TRANIO. No, sir, but hear I do that he hath two: The one as famous for a scolding tongue As is the other for beauteous modesty. PETRUCHIO. Sir, sir, the first's for me; let her go by. GREMIO. Yea, leave that labour to great Hercules, And let it be more than Alcides' twelve. PETRUCHIO. Sir, understand you this of me, in sooth: The youngest daughter, whom you hearken for, Her father keeps from all access of suitors, And will not promise her to any man Until the elder sister first be wed. The younger then is free, and not before. TRANIO. If it be so, sir, that you are the man Must stead us all, and me amongst the rest; And if you break the ice, and do this feat, Achieve the elder, set the younger free For our access- whose hap shall be to have her Will not so graceless be to be ingrate. HORTENSIO. Sir, you say well, and well you do conceive; And since you do profess to be a suitor, You must, as we do, gratify this gentleman, To whom we all rest generally beholding. TRANIO. Sir, I shall not be slack; in sign whereof, Please ye we may contrive this afternoon, And quaff carouses to our mistress' health; And do as adversaries do in law- Strive mightily, but eat and drink as friends. GRUMIO, BIONDELLO. O excellent motion! Fellows, let's be gone. HORTENSIO. The motion's good indeed, and be it so. Petruchio, I shall be your ben venuto. Exeunt
HORTENSIO. Her father is Baptista Minola, An affable and courteous gentleman; Her name is Katherina Minola, Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue. PETRUCHIO. I know her father, though I know not her; And he knew my deceased father well. I will not sleep, Hortensio, till I see her; And therefore let me be thus bold with you To give you over at this first encounter, Unless you will accompany me thither. GRUMIO. I pray you, sir, let him go while the humour lasts. O' my word, and she knew him as well as I do, she would think scolding would do little good upon him. She may perhaps call him half a score knaves or so. Why, that's nothing; and he begin once, he'll rail in his rope-tricks. I'll tell you what, sir: an she stand him but a little, he will throw a figure in her face, and so disfigure her with it that she shall have no more eyes to see withal than a cat. You know him not, sir. HORTENSIO. Tarry, Petruchio, I must go with thee, For in Baptista's keep my treasure is. He hath the jewel of my life in hold, His youngest daughter, beautiful Bianca; And her withholds from me, and other more, Suitors to her and rivals in my love; Supposing it a thing impossible- For those defects I have before rehears'd- That ever Katherina will be woo'd. Therefore this order hath Baptista ta'en, That none shall have access unto Bianca Till Katherine the curst have got a husband. GRUMIO. Katherine the curst! A title for a maid of all titles the worst. HORTENSIO. Now shall my friend Petruchio do me grace, And offer me disguis'd in sober robes To old Baptista as a schoolmaster Well seen in music, to instruct Bianca; That so I may by this device at least Have leave and leisure to make love to her, And unsuspected court her by herself.Enter GREMIO with LUCENTIO disguised as CAMBIO GRUMIO. Here's no knavery! See, to beguile the old folks, how the young folks lay their heads together! Master, master, look about you. Who goes there, ha? HORTENSIO. Peace, Grumio! It is the rival of my love. Petruchio, stand by awhile. GRUMIO. A proper stripling, and an amorous! [They stand aside] GREMIO. O, very well; I have perus'd the note. Hark you, sir; I'll have them very fairly bound- All books of love, see that at any hand; And see you read no other lectures to her. You understand me- over and beside Signior Baptista's liberality, I'll mend it with a largess. Take your paper too, And let me have them very well perfum'd; For she is sweeter than perfume itself To whom they go to. What will you read to her? LUCENTIO. Whate'er I read to her, I'll plead for you As for my patron, stand you so assur'd, As firmly as yourself were still in place; Yea, and perhaps with more successful words Than you, unless you were a scholar, sir. GREMIO. O this learning, what a thing it is! GRUMIO. O this woodcock, what an ass it is! PETRUCHIO. Peace, sirrah! HORTENSIO. Grumio, mum! [Coming forward] God save you, Signior Gremio! GREMIO. And you are well met, Signior Hortensio. Trow you whither I am going? To Baptista Minola. I promis'd to enquire carefully About a schoolmaster for the fair Bianca; And by good fortune I have lighted well On this young man; for learning and behaviour Fit for her turn, well read in poetry And other books- good ones, I warrant ye. HORTENSIO. 'Tis well; and I have met a gentleman Hath promis'd me to help me to another, A fine musician to instruct our mistress; So shall I no whit be behind in duty To fair Bianca, so beloved of me. GREMIO. Beloved of me- and that my deeds shall prove. GRUMIO. And that his bags shall prove. HORTENSIO. Gremio, 'tis now no time to vent our love. Listen to me, and if you speak me fair I'll tell you news indifferent good for either. Here is a gentleman whom by chance I met, Upon agreement from us to his liking, Will undertake to woo curst Katherine; Yea, and to marry her, if her dowry please. GREMIO. So said, so done, is well. Hortensio, have you told him all her faults? PETRUCHIO. I know she is an irksome brawling scold; If that be all, masters, I hear no harm. GREMIO. No, say'st me so, friend? What countryman? PETRUCHIO. Born in Verona, old Antonio's son. My father dead, my fortune lives for me; And I do hope good days and long to see. GREMIO. O Sir, such a life with such a wife were strange! But if you have a stomach, to't a God's name; You shall have me assisting you in all. But will you woo this wild-cat? PETRUCHIO. Will I live? GRUMIO. Will he woo her? Ay, or I'll hang her.
ACT I. SCENE II. Padua. Before HORTENSIO'S houseEnter PETRUCHIO and his man GRUMIOPETRUCHIO. Verona, for a while I take my leave,To see my friends in Padua; but of allMy best beloved and approved friend,Hortensio; and I trow this is his house.Here, sirrah Grumio, knock, I say.GRUMIO. Knock, sir! Whom should I knock?Is there any man has rebus'd your worship?PETRUCHIO. Villain, I say, knock me here soundly.GRUMIO. Knock you here, sir? Why, sir, what am I, sir, that Ishould knock you here, sir?PETRUCHIO. Villain, I say, knock me at this gate,And rap me well, or I'll knock your knave's pate.GRUMIO. My master is grown quarrelsome. I should knock you first,And then I know after who comes by the worst.PETRUCHIO. Will it not be?Faith, sirrah, an you'll not knock I'll ring it;I'll try how you can sol-fa, and sing it.[He wrings him by the ears]GRUMIO. Help, masters, help! My master is mad.PETRUCHIO. Now knock when I bid you, sirrah villain!Enter HORTENSIOHORTENSIO. How now! what's the matter? My old friend Grumio and mygood friend Petruchio! How do you all at Verona?PETRUCHIO. Signior Hortensio, come you to part the fray?'Con tutto il cuore ben trovato' may I say.HORTENSIO. Alla nostra casa ben venuto,Molto honorato signor mio Petruchio.Rise, Grumio, rise; we will compound this quarrel.GRUMIO. Nay, 'tis no matter, sir, what he 'leges in Latin. If thisbe not a lawful cause for me to leave his service- look you, sir:he bid me knock him and rap him soundly, sir. Well, was it fitfor a servant to use his master so; being, perhaps, for aught Isee, two and thirty, a pip out?Whom would to God I had well knock'd at first,Then had not Grumio come by the worst.PETRUCHIO. A senseless villain! Good Hortensio,I bade the rascal knock upon your gate,And could not get him for my heart to do it.GRUMIO. Knock at the gate? O heavens! Spake you not these wordsplain: 'Sirrah knock me here, rap me here, knock me well, andknock me soundly'? And come you now with 'knocking at the gate'?PETRUCHIO. Sirrah, be gone, or talk not, I advise you.HORTENSIO. Petruchio, patience; I am Grumio's pledge;Why, this's a heavy chance 'twixt him and you,Your ancient, trusty, pleasant servant Grumio.And tell me now, sweet friend, what happy galeBlows you to Padua here from old Verona?PETRUCHIO. Such wind as scatters young men through the worldTo seek their fortunes farther than at home,Where small experience grows. But in a few,Signior Hortensio, thus it stands with me:Antonio, my father, is deceas'd,And I have thrust myself into this maze,Haply to wive and thrive as best I may;Crowns in my purse I have, and goods at home,And so am come abroad to see the world.HORTENSIO. Petruchio, shall I then come roundly to theeAnd wish thee to a shrewd ill-favour'd wife?Thou'dst thank me but a little for my counsel,And yet I'll promise thee she shall be rich,And very rich; but th'art too much my friend,And I'll not wish thee to her.PETRUCHIO. Signior Hortensio, 'twixt such friends as weFew words suffice; and therefore, if thou knowOne rich enough to be Petruchio's wife,As wealth is burden of my wooing dance,Be she as foul as was Florentius' love,As old as Sibyl, and as curst and shrewdAs Socrates' Xanthippe or a worse-She moves me not, or not removes, at least,Affection's edge in me, were she as roughAs are the swelling Adriatic seas.I come to wive it wealthily in Padua;If wealthily, then happily in Padua.GRUMIO. Nay, look you, sir, he tells you flatly what his mind is.Why, give him gold enough and marry him to a puppet or anaglet-baby, or an old trot with ne'er a tooth in her head, thoughshe has as many diseases as two and fifty horses. Why, nothingcomes amiss, so money comes withal.HORTENSIO. Petruchio, since we are stepp'd thus far in,I will continue that I broach'd in jest.I can, Petruchio, help thee to a wifeWith wealth enough, and young and beauteous;Brought up as best becomes a gentlewoman;Her only fault, and that is faults enough,Is- that she is intolerable curst,And shrewd and froward so beyond all measureThat, were my state far worser than it is,I would not wed her for a mine of gold.PETRUCHIO. Hortensio, peace! thou know'st not gold's effect.Tell me her father's name, and 'tis enough;For I will board her though she chide as loudAs thunder when the clouds in autumn crack.HORTENSIO. Her father is Baptista Minola,An affable and courteous gentleman;Her name is Katherina Minola,Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue.
THE TAMING OF THE SHREWby William Shakespeare1594Dramatis PersonaePersons in the InductionA LORDCHRISTOPHER SLY, a tinkerHOSTESSPAGEPLAYERSHUNTSMENSERVANTSBAPTISTA MINOLA, a gentleman of PaduaVINCENTIO, a Merchant of PisaLUCENTIO, son to Vincentio, in love with BiancaPETRUCHIO, a gentleman of Verona, a suitor to KatherinaSuitors to BiancaGREMIOHORTENSIOServants to LucentioTRANIOBIONDELLOServants to PetruchioGRUMIOCURTISA PEDANTDaughters to BaptistaKATHERINA, the shrewBIANCAA WIDOWTailor, Haberdasher, and Servants attending on Baptista andPetruchioSCENE: Padua, and PETRUCHIO'S house in the countrySC_1INDUCTION. SCENE I.Before an alehouse on a heathEnter HOSTESS and SLYSLY. I'll pheeze you, in faith.HOSTESS. A pair of stocks, you rogue!SLY. Y'are a baggage; the Slys are no rogues. Look in thechronicles: we came in with Richard Conqueror. Therefore,paucaspallabris; let the world slide. Sessa!HOSTESS. You will not pay for the glasses you have burst?SLY. No, not a denier. Go by, Saint Jeronimy, go to thy coldbedand warm thee.HOSTESS. I know my remedy; I must go fetch the third-borough.ExitSLY. Third, or fourth, or fifth borough, I'll answer him bylaw.I'll not budge an inch, boy; let him come, and kindly.[Falls asleep]Wind horns. Enter a LORD from bunting, with his trainLORD. Huntsman, I charge thee, tender well my hounds;Brach Merriman, the poor cur, is emboss'd;And couple Clowder with the deep-mouth'd brach.Saw'st thou not, boy, how Silver made it goodAt the hedge corner, in the coldest fault?I would not lose the dog for twenty pound.FIRST HUNTSMAN. Why, Belman is as good as he, my lord;He cried upon it at the merest loss,And twice to-day pick'd out the dullest scent;Trust me, I take him for the better dog.LORD. Thou art a fool; if Echo were as fleet,I would esteem him worth a dozen such.But sup them well, and look unto them all;To-morrow I intend to hunt again.FIRST HUNTSMAN. I will, my lord.LORD. What's here? One dead, or drunk?See, doth he breathe?SECOND HUNTSMAN. He breathes, my lord. Were he not warm'd withale,This were a bed but cold to sleep so soundly.LORD. O monstrous beast, how like a swine he lies!Grim death, how foul and loathsome is thine image!Sirs, I will practise on this drunken man.What think you, if he were convey'd to bed,Wrapp'd in sweet clothes, rings put upon his fingers,A most delicious banquet by his bed,And brave attendants near him when he wakes,Would not the beggar then forget himself?FIRST HUNTSMAN. Believe me, lord, I think he cannot choose.SECOND HUNTSMAN. It would seem strange unto him when he wak'd.LORD. Even as a flatt'ring dream or worthless fancy.Then take him up, and manage well the jest:Carry him gently to my fairest chamber,And hang it round with all my wanton pictures;Balm his foul head in warm distilled waters,And burn sweet wood to make the lodging sweet;Procure me music ready when he wakes,To make a dulcet and a heavenly sound;And if he chance to speak, be ready straight,And with a low submissive reverenceSay 'What is it your honour will command?'Let one attend him with a silver basinFull of rose-water and bestrew'd with flowers;Another bear the ewer, the third a diaper,And say 'Will't please your lordship cool your hands?'Some one be ready with a costly suit,And ask him what apparel he will wear;Another tell him of his hounds and horse,And that his lady mourns at his disease;Persuade him that he hath been lunatic,And, when he says he is, say that he dreams,For he is nothing but a mighty lord.This do, and do it kindly, gentle sirs;It will be pastime passing excellent,If it be husbanded with modesty.FIRST HUNTSMAN. My lord, I warrant you we will play our partAs he shall think by our true diligenceHe is no less than what we say he is.LORD. Take him up gently, and to bed with him;And each one to his office when he wakes.[SLY is carried out. A trumpet sounds]Sirrah, go see what trumpet 'tis that sounds-Exit SERVANTBelike some noble gentleman that means,Travelling some journey, to repose him here.
The Petruchio Cocktail shows how egg white and rich simple syrup can be used in a cocktail to create mouth fell and texture.
Janet McTeer talks about her experiences in "God of Carnage", having starred in the play's London premiere (where the characters were still French) and now playing it on Broadway (as an American) and whether there are differences between her performances as Veronique and Veronica. She also shares her highly fortuitous experience of applying to the top English acting schools, with virtually no prior stage experience; the shock of moving from her hometown of York to London and the emotional crisis that hit her while attending the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art; her first jobs out of school, including the Nottingham Playhouse, the Royal Exchange in Manchester and, after only two years, the Royal Shakespeare Company (in "A Midsummer Night's Dream" as Hippolyta and Titania); her participation as more than simply a performer in the development and production of "A Doll's House" -- and why the role ultimately caused her to take a four year hiatus from the stage; why working on Broadway is such a thrill even after her great acclaim in England; the fun she had playing Petruchio in an all-female "The Taming of the Shrew" at London's Globe Theatre; and how she made the choice between playing Elizabeth or Mary in the acclaimed revival of "Mary Stuart". Original air date - April 21, 2010.
Janet McTeer talks about her experiences in "God of Carnage", having starred in the play's London premiere (where the characters were still French) and now playing it on Broadway (as an American) and whether there are differences between her performances as Veronique and Veronica. She also shares her highly fortuitous experience of applying to the top English acting schools, with virtually no prior stage experience; the shock of moving from her hometown of York to London and the emotional crisis that hit her while attending the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art; her first jobs out of school, including the Nottingham Playhouse, the Royal Exchange in Manchester and, after only two years, the Royal Shakespeare Company (in "A Midsummer Night's Dream" as Hippolyta and Titania); her participation as more than simply a performer in the development and production of "A Doll's House" -- and why the role ultimately caused her to take a four year hiatus from the stage; why working on Broadway is such a thrill even after her great acclaim in England; the fun she had playing Petruchio in an all-female "The Taming of the Shrew" at London's Globe Theatre; and how she made the choice between playing Elizabeth or Mary in the acclaimed revival of "Mary Stuart". Original air date - April 21, 2010.
Janet McTeer (1997 Tony Award winner for Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role in a Play for “A Doll’s House”) talks about her experiences in “God of Carnage”, having starred in the play's London premiere (where the characters were still French) and now playing it on Broadway (as an American) and whether there are differences between her performances as Veronique and Veronica. She also shares her highly fortuitous experience of applying to the top English acting schools, with virtually no prior stage experience; the shock of moving from her hometown of York to London and the emotional crisis that hit her while attending the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art; her first jobs out of school, including the Nottingham Playhouse, the Royal Exchange in Manchester and, after only two years, the Royal Shakespeare Company (in “A Midsummer Night's Dream” as Hippolyta and Titania); her participation as more than simply a performer in the development and production of “A Doll's House” -- and why the role ultimately caused her to take a four year hiatus from the stage; why working on Broadway is such a thrill even after her great acclaim in England; the fun she had playing Petruchio in an all-female “The Taming of the Shrew” at London's Globe Theatre; and how she made the choice between playing Elizabeth or Mary in the acclaimed revival of “Mary Stuart”.
Episode 6 sees Eric and Phil dissecting the final pair of stop/plosive sounds in English: /k/ and /ɡ/. As always, we work our way around the task of describing the sounds, their history, and usage in the course of about an hour and 10 minutes.Show Notes:Correction: Phil referred to "Findlay" as derived from Finn's Lea, but it turns out that it's from Gaelic, and that means Fionnlagh – "fair warrior." Bradley would have been a much better example: Brad=broad and Lea=meadow.voiceless/voiced velar plosive: co-articulation, double action of closing the mouth with the back of the tongue at the soft palate, and closing off the nasal passage by lifting the soft palate at the velo-pharyngeal port.Let’s take a tour of the anatomy. This will help us to deal with the idea that /t/ is apico alveolar but /k/ is dorsovelarThe Roof of the MouthTectal: an adjective derived from the anatomical term "tectum," a roof-like structure. Labia/labial: the lips; bilabial with both lips, labio-dental with lower lip and upper teeth, as in /f/ and /v/. (For people with an extreme overbite, one might make a dento-labial sound (upper lip and lower teeth.)Dental: the teeth (as heard in the “th” sounds, /θ/ & /ð/ )Alveolar ridge/alveolar: the gum ridge, behind the upper front teethPalate/palatal: the hard palate, rising up behind the alveolar ridge. Phil describes a small hole in his palate; Eric, in searching the net for information on this, could only find stuff about "Jacobsen's Organ" aka Vomeronasal organ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vomeronasal_organ, an auxiliary olfactory sense organ; it's thoroughly debatable whether it exists in humans at all. Who knows what Phil has? (apparently, he hasn't had any of this since college days...)Velum/velar: the soft palate, behind the hard palateUvula/uvular: the "small grape"-like structure that hangs down from the arch of the soft palatePharynx/pharyngeal: the column or space behind the tongue, the "chimney" that goes from the larynx up to the noseEpiglottis/epiglottal: the flap-like value that protects the larynx during swallowingGlottis/glottal: the vocal folds (technically the SPACE between the vocal folds, which disappears every time the vocal folds vibrateAri-Epiglottal/ False Vocal Folds: [there was some debate between Phil and Eric how Dudley Do-Right sounded, and whether it was ari-epiglottal tension or velar tension...The Parts of the TongueTip or Apex/apical: front edge of the tongue, the 'rim' of the tongueBlade or Lamina/laminal: the front part of the tongue, the top surfaceBack or Dorsum/dorsal: the back of the tongue, which is subdivided into: Front, Middle, Back, or, Front and Back —antero-dorsal or postero-dorsalRoot or Radix/radical: the root of the tongue/k/ and /ɡ/ are different from other plosives because it is made on the back of the tongue, which works in a more gross mannercan be made further forward /ki/ or further back /kɑ/. Challenge of learning /k/ and /ɡ/ for children because they are made further back in the mouthThe McGurk Effect Experiment: Can you identify Phil's 3 sounds? World Atlas of Language Structures: http://wals.info/ WALS shows 2,650 languages and notes 32 missing / ɡ /Languages that are missing /ɡ/ but not /k/From Wikipedia [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voiced_velar_plosive ] "Of the six plosives that would be expected from the most common pattern world-wide—that is, three places of articulation plus voicing ([p b, t d, k ɡ])—[p] and [ɡ] are the most frequently missing, being absent in about 10% of languages that otherwise have this pattern.[...] It seems that [ɡ] is somewhat more difficult to articulate than the other basic plosives. "Ian Maddieson speculates that this may be due to a physical difficulty in voicing velars: Voicing requires that air flow into the mouth cavity, and the relatively small space allowed by the position of velar consonants means that it will fill up with air quickly, making voicing difficult to maintain in [ɡ] for as long as it is in [d] or [b]."HISTORY OF THE LETTERS:In Greek the symbol of the K (Kappa) turned the "right way" (the way it is in our writing), prior to this it was facing the other direction. Gamma was brought into Latin to represent the C. C had a line added to it to indicate the voiced version, G.SPELLINGS:k “key, keep, koala, kangaroo” “mask, make, pink, walk”c “cat, cost, cut” (contrast “cease, ace, ,macerate ”) Hard/softcc “accuse, stucco” ck “pick, stock”ch “charisma, Christ, choir, ache”Shakespeare's "Petruchio" probably should be [pəʼtɹu.tʃo] not [pəʼtɹu.ki.oʊ]g “game, gate, bag, agony” (contrast “gem, badge,magical ”) Hard/softgg “egg, dagger”gh “ghost, ghetto” (contrast “night, ought”)gu “guide, guest, guerrilla” foreign originckg blackguardx “examine, exhaust”Note that "x" can be /ks/ or /gz/ depending on the word, e.g. /ks/ "excellent" , /gz/ "exist".Soft G is the affricate /dʒ/, while Soft C is /s/.PHONETIC NOTATION: represented by lower case k and ɡIPA symbol for /ɡ/ is the "single-story" version of the g lowercase with an open tail, rather than a looptail. VARIATIONS:Not a lot of variations: mostly to do with voice onset timeVariation: final /k/ becoming fricative in Liverpool week [wiç], like [laiç], back [bax], dock [dɒχ]John Maidment, commenting on JC Wells' blog post on "VOT is more":"One might also like to add that VOT is sensitive to place of articulation. Other things being equal, the VOT of posterior articulations, velar and uvular, are considerably longer, at least for native English speakers, than articulations further forward in the vocal tract. A typical VOT for stressed syllable initial [k] in English is in the region of 120ms, while that for an equivalent [p]is only 60-70ms. I am pretty sure that this difference is an important secondary cue for the perception of place in voiceless plosives and one which, as far as I know, has not been properly investigated."Non-English Stop plosivesPalatalized stops (often heard in Russian, [tʲ] [dʲ] vs. Palatal stop [c] or [ɟ]Uvular stop, as in Arabic pronunciation of Qatar or Iraq [q].Though it's unlikely that a character will do a sound substitution on stop-plosives, however, characters might speak foreign language work, or say words within the text, such as place names or character names.Original Pronunciation: David Crystal is the leading proponent of this type of pronunciation, especially at the Globe Shakespeare Company in London. http://www.davidcrystal.com/DC_articles/Shakespeare11.pdf