Podcasts about Ahem

Hello again! Keigh Geoffley here, host of the E Summer Games Awards Fest, back with another amazing showcase of games! I almost didn't get The Stage Select auditorium this year, because things snuck up on Julian and it took him a long time to return my calls. But don't worry: ESGAF3 2025 is here, and it's our biggest show to date!Ahem. It's Julian. Yeah, we're doing this bit again for Not E3 season. Please note that we recorded this on the night that Summer Game Fest Opening Night Live happened, so this episode covers that, plus the Unreal presentation and the Sony State of Play. We'll tackle the Xbox Direct and anything we may have missed next week. It's a jam-packed episode regardless, so please enjoy!00:00 Introduction, respect for Chef Man07:02 Unreal Engine showcase33:00 Sony State of Play01:38:40 Summer Game Fest Opening Night LiveTheme song and interstitial music by Megan McDuffee: https://meganmcduffee.comLogo and artwork by John GholsonAnnouncer: John GholsonJoin our Discord, learn about how you can support the show, and more: https://linktr.ee/TheStageSelectEmail: thestageselectpod@gmail.comCopyright 2024 Space Monkey Mafia Productions

Isn't that kind of *ahem* content banned on social media? Hour 3 6/6/2025 full 2098 Fri, 06 Jun 2025 21:00:00 +0000 Y61SMDumkIea4WEEQk9QptV24v6AqThQ news The Dana & Parks Podcast news Isn't that kind of *ahem* content banned on social media? Hour 3 6/6/2025 You wanted it... Now here it is! Listen to each hour of the Dana & Parks Show whenever and wherever you want! © 2025 Audacy, Inc. News False https://player.ampe

Hot DateA 7-part series by Member389. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Stories. The tires hissed along the gravel drive as I pulled alongside her Jeep. I walked to the door, bouquet in hand and rang the bell. I took a deep breath, just as the door opened. A pretty girl stood there, dark hair and piercing eyes stared intently at me for a moment. In a flash of an eye a familiar crooked little smile crossed her face."Mom, your hot date is here!" She yelled over her shoulder."Well don't make him stand on the step, let him in!" Summer hollered back. I just started chuckling as Emily opened the door. Emily cracked open the outside door and opened the inside door further."Come on in." She said."Hi Emily, I'm Pete." I said holding out my hand. Already over five feet I could tell she was going to be tall like her mother."Are those for my mom?" She asked nodding at the flowers. I just shook my head."No, they're for you." I said presenting them to her. Her eyes grew wide and her expression got serious for a moment before she took them with a smile."I'll be right out." Came the call from another room. She laughed a bit after saying it. I began to think this was a calculated move.Emily set the flowers down and disappeared head first into a low cupboard coming up with a vase. She filled it with water and put the flowers into it, preening them to get them the way she wanted.Summer came out of a short hallway dressed in jeans and a blue and gray striped sweater. Her hair freshly brushed and a big smile on her face."Hi." She said giving me a quick hug, and more notably a slight push-off after. She noticed the flowers on the counter. "They're beautiful. Thank you."Emily turned and interjected with a grin. "He brought them for me.""Oh he did, did he?" She looked at me, the eyebrows lifting.I gave Summer a slight shrug and a wink. She just gave me a quick eye-roll in return. "Score one for the visiting team." She said, in a low voice."You're the fireman that saved my mom from drowning in the ocean, huh?" Emily asked."Actually we responded to a fall victim that was out on the rocks. If I hadn't braved the wild winds and pounding surf, she might not have made it." I said. "She could have been lobster chow.""Oh lord, the story gets more dramatic with the telling." Summer joined in. "I fell on the rocks, luckily I had a cell signal, and called for help. Pete here was one of the first responders and promptly hauled me back to the sand and brought me to the walk-in clinic to get X-rays. See? Not nearly as dramatic as you two make it sound.""She was laid up for a week after, and I kept an eye on her. I didn't want her to starve because she couldn't feed herself." I added, a wicked glint in my eye."Yes, you can cook, and I certainly didn't want for anything." She gave me a warning look that I should stop before more questions began. "Is your stuff in the car Em?" Emily nodded at her mother. "Grab your jacket, let's go I'm hungry." She said grinning. Emily trotted up the hallway, and Summer stepped closer and we kissed deeply. "Nice job with the flowers you clown." She ran her thumb across my lip wiping away any telltale lip gloss."I do what I can." I grinned, and stepped back a half step before Emily walked back into the kitchen.We left, Emily yelled 'Shotgun!' and her mother quickly squashed that plan, though I graciously got in the back seat and let her have the front. Summer giving me a sidelong look, knowing I was indulging Emily for my own sake."Is this your guitar in the back Emily?" I asked. She turned as far as she could in her seat to reply."Yup, my teacher is going to be there tonight and we're going to play.""That's awesome! What are you going to be playing?""You'll just have to wait and hear." She smiled, a mirror of her mother's impish grin.Summer pulled up beside the fire house and parked between a couple pickup trucks. We walked inside to the din of what sounded like a school cafeteria. The engine sitting outside had made room for folding tables and chairs to be set up in the bay. People were already seated and others milled about talking and laughing."I'm going to find Jen." Emily said, wrestling her guitar case through the crowd.Summer was saying hi to people as we passed through the crowd, but she kept moving like she was on a mission."Dale!" She called out. A large guy turned around, he must have been six and a half feet tall. She wrapped an arm part way around his waist and hugged him. "Come here I've got someone I want you to meet. This is my rescuer, remember when I took that spill a couple summers back. Pete, this is my uncle Dale.""Hi there. Thanks for making sure she didn't end up as fish bait." He said smiling, shaking my hand."Pete is applying to the fire department here, looking to get hired for the new year." She added.Dale's eye turned on me appraising openly. "Looking to move to our neck of the woods are you?"I nodded. "Yes sir." I didn't add anything so that rumors wouldn't begin. The look in his eye got shrewd, and he knew exactly why I was willing to pick up and move a thousand miles away from home. The reason was standing right next to him."Hell don't call me sir, save that for her dad." He said tilting his head towards Summer. "Call me Dale, good luck to you Pete. Now go on and get some food before the kids clean us out." He said smiling. We made our way through the crowd, Summer greeting people as she passed, stopping a few times to introduce me around. We eventually found ourselves in the chow line. Summer insisted on paying for us at the little card table. She mentioned that hurricane Emily might blow through any minute. The lady let her know that Emily had already come through the line.We found a place to sit and eat at one of the tables. People stopped to chat and moved on, the night had a familiar small town feel to it. Before long we could hear the sound of guitars, chords being strummed here and there. People started to grab seats, and there was Emily sitting on the left of another girl and a woman. They were sitting around a music stand and Emily and the other girl were watching the woman point things out on the sheet music. I felt a hand grip my thigh and looked at Summer who was beaming at Emily with a big grin on her face. A few moments later the woman began and the girls joined in playing Van Morrison's Moondance instrumental. My foot began tapping and Summer's grip tightened on my leg as I ran my arm over the back of her chair rubbing her back. She turned to me with the silliest grin. I only hoped she was reminiscing about when I played it for her at the summer festival. They gave way to the Beatles Eleanor Rigby, then played John Denver's Take Me Home, which they sang.Summer leaned in close to my ear and whispered. "Thank you." Before giving me a peck on the cheek. I just wrapped my arm around her and gave her a squeeze and smiled.As the group finished the crowd erupted with applause, the girls grinning ear to ear. The woman spoke up after the noise died down stating that she had room for one more student this year if anybody knew someone looking for lessons.Emily packed her guitar away, and put her chair back with the tables. She made her way back to where we were sitting and got caught up in a bear hug from Summer."Alright, say goodbye to your friends, we need to get going."As we left I hollered shotgun and got front seat privileges on the way back to the house. We chatted on the way back about other songs Emily had learned, and how long she'd been playing. Coincidentally it had been just over a year. Summer pointed out that she was a natural, learning very quickly."We learned Moondance this summer. I figure if mom liked it so much I wanted to learn it.""Your mom likes Van Morrison?" I prodded."She's played his greatest hits until she practically wore out the CD." Emily replied. I just grinned wider. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Summer's expression and nearly bust out laughing as she tried to look aloof, the twinkle in her eye giving her away."Well there are some other great musicians from that era you might like. Maybe I can suggest a few for you to listen to." I said."Do you play too?" She asked surprised."Not guitar. I play saxophone, clarinet, and dabble a little in piano." I said."I can teach you." She said, excited.She didn't begin to know how much I would love that. "That would be awesome.""Not tonight." Summer chimed in. "You need to get ready for your sleep over, and that room of yours looks like a tornado touched down in there." As we entered the house she told Emily that she needed to get it cleaned up. Emily went down the hallway with a few sighs and several eye rolls."Would you like something to drink?" Summer asked, with an unusual look in her eye."Yes, please." I nodded, trying decipher it. She opened the fridge and pulled a wine bottle out and began opening it. Music started playing down the hall as Emily puttered around making more noise than necessary. I turned from looking down the hall to look at Summer. She had stopped opening the wine and I noticed her shoulders trembling slightly. I stepped closer my hand circling her waist."Hey, what's the matter?" I asked softly."I don't know, it all seems to be happening so fast, I feel like I'm waiting for the train to derail. You know? I get the feeling something is going to go wrong and it's all going to blow up in my face." She looked up, her eyes burning intently.I chuckled. "How do you think I felt when I put that note in the mail box and drove back down the mountain to wait and see if you'd respond.""Those were the scariest hours of my life." I added softly, staring down at the wine bottle. "I mean I had no idea if you'd call the cops, or call and tell me it was all a mistake and I should go home, or worse, just throw it away, and me with it."She spun around in my arms and wrapped her arms around my neck kissing me fiercely. "If you think for a moment that it didn't hurt to leave you like that, then you're crazy. I only did what I thought was best.""Ahem?" Came loudly from the hallway door. I tried to release Summer from my grip but she just held tighter and gave me another quick kiss."Better let her get used to it." She whispered, before slowly letting go of me."Ready for inspection." Emily said saluting as she stood at attention.Summer let out a snort. "I bet. How much of it is stuffed under the bed?" She asked as she spun Emily around and pointed her down the hallway giving her a nudge.As I watched them retreat down the hallway I felt a warm glow deep inside me, the feeling enveloped me, eventually making the hair on the back of my neck tingle. There was no other explanation for it, this just felt right. I turned and poured the wine into the glasses, putting the bottle back into the fridge as I listened to muffled conversation and shuffling as the last of the cleaning was directed."Put the basket on the dryer, and I'll ask Pete if he wants to join us for movie night." Summer said. She walked back toward me, a grin on her face before she let out a dramatic sigh and rolled her eyes. "Still a disaster, but you can walk through it now." She smiled. "So, on Friday nights we usually pick a movie to watch. It's sort of a tradition, some mommy and me time. Care to join us?""So long as it's not an intrusion on the mommy and me time." I said grinning back at her."Like I said, she's going to have to get used to you being around. What better way to start.""Well we better find something family friendly, you know, no late night cable." I chuckled.Summer laughed. "No and I'll make sure we don't bore you with princesses and tiaras.""You don't have to change what you'd normally watch on my account." I replied."Well it is nearly Halloween, horror movies have been popular the last few weeks, but they're getting old. What's your favorite?"I shrugged, giving her a non-committal look. "I'm pretty easy going, though ax wielding, chainsaw revving, slasher flicks are a little too much for me. I've decided a while back that I like being able to sleep.""I'm sure we'll find something." She smiled wrapping her arms around my waist."So what's the verdict so far?" I asked softly kissing her ear."Hmm?" She responded, running her lips up my cheek leaving a trail of kisses."Emmy? Am I doing okay?" I prodded her.She let go of my earlobe long enough to whisper. "Oh, you're a shoe in. She asked me if you were my boyfriend, with a huge grin on her face.""Well?" I asked, wondering at her response.She pulled back laying her forehead against mine. I could see the little grin on her face, she bit her lip and said. "I think he just might be if you like him. She nodded like a bobble head doll.""Yes!" I whispered. "Easiest interview ever.""Am I going to walk into a room and find you two sucking face every time?" Emily said, clearly not as exasperated as she tried to sound."Only if I'm lucky." I replied."Go and get everything ready and I'll make the popcorn." Summer said.We sat down on the sofa, I ended up in the middle. "What are we watching?" I asked."You choose." Emily said.I took the controller and thought a moment and keyed in a title to see if it was available, and it was."Ever heard of this one?" I asked as the film poster popped up with a short synopsis.Both shook their heads. "Nope, any good?""Well the book was fantastic, but I've never seen the movie." I hit play, and the credits began. The movie was a hit, the fantasy and magic captured Emily's imagination as she let out occasional exclamations. I chuckled inwardly when I realized I had both of them tucked under each arm. I don't remember when that happened but I certainly wasn't going to complain about it."That was a good movie. I love when he went to find the falling star and found the girl." Emily said."Sort of reminds me of how I found your mom on the beach." I said."Oh please." Summer said, rolling her eyes and giving me a poke in the ribs. Emily broke into a fit of giggles. "Alright you, get ready for bed.""But it's not even ten yet!" Emily shot back."It will be by the time you're done." Her mother replied. "Now scoot, get a move on." Summer uncurled herself and began to stand too. She reached into my lap to pick up the popcorn bowl and I waved her hand away and picked it up standing up too. I set the bowl and glasses on the counter as Emily trudged up the hallway with a sigh. An equal sigh came from Summer as she wrapped her arms around me from behind. I felt her soft warm lips meet the nape of my neck."Thank you." She said."For what?""For everything. You don't think she snuggled up to you just because you had the popcorn, do you.""Well, it was really good popcorn." I smiled. I got another poke in the ribs for my comment."No. She likes you.""She's pretty terrific, like a mini you." I said turning in her arms holding her closer."Mom!"I just began chuckling as Summer buried her head in my neck. "God help us if we're out of toothpaste." She mumbled before giving me a kiss and turning to go find the source of the distress."What babe." She said as she walked down the hallway, and turned into the bath.I washed the wine glasses by hand, returning to the cupboard she'd taken them from earlier. They both came back into the kitchen a few minutes later."Goodnight Pete." Emily said."Sweet dreams pumpkin." I said, not quite sure where that came from. She launched herself at me hugging me like she was holding on for dear life."Thank you for saving my mom." She sniffled. I hugged her back just as tightly and gave her a peck on the top of the head."You're welcome, but I think it was your mom that saved me. Hopefully we'll have time to figure that out.""Take all the time you want." She smiled up at me before she turned and trotted over to her mom, gave her a big hug and kiss and disappeared down the hallway with a parting goodnight.Summer stood across the room from me leaning back against the door jamb, her arms crossed over her chest as she looked side long down the hallway. A few minutes passed before she let out a sigh. "I have got to stop overestimating how smart I think I am."I chuckled at that."Seriously! You know why she called me into the bathroom?" She asked."I'm guessing it wasn't because she was out of toothpaste.""No! She gave me the kind of interrogation I'd expect from my mother! She asked stuff I hadn't even thought of yet." She chuckled nervously. "Is he moving in? Are you two getting married? If he's moving here, what does his family think of that. Does he know you can't have more kids? That last one threw me, not because I had thought of it when you and I spoke the other day, but that she thought of it!"I walked over to Summer and leaned down and kissed her softly. "Well, I've added another piece to the puzzle, she's just trying to figure out how it's going to fit.""She wanted to know if you were staying the night." Summer said glancing down the hall. "Damn she grew up fast."I laughed at that. "Yea they have a way of doing that while you're not watching them. What did you tell her?"She sighed again. "I told her that you were going home for a couple months to finish out your year at work and that you'd be coming back after Christmas. You'd be getting your own place, and that we hadn't planned anything beyond that!" Her eyes were wide like she'd just gotten the third degree."Come here." I gathered her close and she uncrossed her arms and held on to me. "You're right on the money, everything you said was perfect. I mean hell, I'm not even sure I'm marriage material.She leaned back and looked me in the eye. "You're kidding right?""Yup, actually I'm a hell of a catch. You should be lucky to have me." I grinned."I am a lucky girl. I should pick up a lottery ticket." She smiled back at me.We sat down on the sofa, Summer leaned on me. "Sorry if all this seems a little strange, it's just that she's the most important thing in my life and I don't want to grow old knowing that I screwed her up before I turned her loose on the world.""I've only known her a few hours and I'd say that you're doing a hell of a job. She's smart, funny, warm, and just a bit sarcastic so she doesn't take life too seriously. All of which proves that you're doing a great job." I replied."How are my panties still on?" She grinned throwing a leg over my lap, straddling me while we kissed."These jeans don't want to let go of your incredible ass so they can escape." I said grasping her pulling her down onto my lap to feel the effect she was having on me. She twisted my shoulders slightly and pushed me flat on the couch."How do you do it? You make me feel loved and cared for like I've never felt before. I mean you even did it when I first met you, and you were just a, a kid.""Well since I feel pretty much the same I think it comes from the fact that I love you, no ifs, ands or buts." As I finished, I gave her ass a firm squeeze through her jeans. "Okay, maybe one ass." I added pulling her up slightly, resting her on my hip. We kissed slowly, hands roaming where ever they would. I kissed my way down from her ear to her throat and felt her melt into me. She let out a soft moan. She responded by unbuttoning my shirt and sliding her hand inside. I had her sweater pushed halfway up her back."Seriously, you two need to get a room." Emily said, from the kitchen doorway.I started giggling like a teenager, Summer tried hard not to join in. "Go to bed!" She said before burying her face into my shoulder in fits of laughter."If he gives you a hickey, you'd better wear a turtleneck when Jesse and her mom come tomorrow." She said retreating down the hallway. "I don't want to have to explain that!""It's been a while, come here." I said leaning down and nuzzling her neck."Ah! Don't you dare!" She said pulling back."I can't be held responsible for what I may do." I growled into her neck, and gave her a little kiss and lick. "If I don't get going soon I'll be making you breakfast in the morning.""Scrambled, toast, sausage and coffee regular." She said before slipping her tongue into my mouth."What? No juice?" I asked, after coming up for air."All out, need to pick some up at the store." She licked my lower lip before dipping into my mouth once again. Her thigh was rubbing between my legs, stroking my cock. It's a wonder it hadn't torn through my jeans."Any bacon?" I said sliding her sweater over her head and unclasping her bra.She let out a soft moan as I began stroking her freed breast, thumbing the nipple into a similar state as my cock."I don't think so, no." She said as she kissed down my chest pushing the t-shirt up and taking my nipple into her mouth. I was sure that the jeans didn't have much time left. In an effort to prove my point, Summer slid her hand down and stroked the bulge. I had to stop her."I think we need to take this to the bedroom before Emmy finds us sprawled here naked in the morning.""Good idea." She said gasping. She stood up her neck and chest flushed pink, eyes bright and hair wild. She grabbed her clothes and reached down to grab my hand and pull me up, hauling me off the couch with more strength than I expected nearly causing me to knock her over. "Come on." She tugged me along into her bedroom, and turned on a small bedside lamp. She turned and kissed me again, while doing her best to tear my shirt off. I assisted in getting both off. Both arms wrapped around my neck, the heat of her pressed against my chest was intense. I reached between us and fought her jeans to let her free. She brought her hands down steadying mine and the button came free, the zipper went down swiftly as I ran my hands around behind her pushing them down over her ass. She pushed away and began tearing at my belt and jeans to get them off. We finally freed ourselves of our clothing, Summer reaching for my cock, stroking it softly. It was nearly torture."Think with that head not this one before you answer. Have you had unprotected sex with anyone besides me." She looked up at me asked, her eyes wide with expectation."No, I haven't. I had a good teacher." I said. Her grip tightened and her face lit with a little smirk. She snatched a throw pillow off the bed and dropped at my feet before kneeling down and laving my cock with her tongue. She took me into her mouth and began sliding more of me into her mouth with each stroke. She began massaging my balls while her rhythm increased. "Oh God, slow down I can't hold out much longer." That seemed to spur her on as the pace increased bringing me to the edge before she pulled back with just the tip in her mouth, she reached up and began massaging me behind my balls causing my immediate orgasm. The contractions lessened as Summer took it all in, swallowing quickly. I was nearly spent and ready to collapse when she started in again. She worked my cock deep into her mouth again, her efforts to keep me hard weren't wasted, and I was ready for more.She backed off and licked her way from base to tip. "There now that we have that out of the way, we can put this where it belongs." She stood and turned to pull down the covers and I scooped her up and set her on the bed, turning her so her legs were dangling off the edge. I punted the pillow so it was right in front of her and knelt down. She let out a soft moan as she wrapped her legs around my neck pulling me down to pleasure her.She was already soaked, the heat pouring off her body was intense. I teased and licked her swollen lips, her hips began to sway trying to make me hit a certain spot. I danced around her clit, gently lifting the hood with the tip of my tongue and retreating. Soon she had handfuls of my hair in her grip, pulling my face into her harder. "Stop teasing!" She said through gritted teeth. Her wish was my command. I pushed two fingers into her easily as I pulled back the hood and began sucking and licking her clit. Her body tensed as she arched her back and let out a yelp. Before she could make any more noise she'd grabbed a pillow and covered her face with it as she climaxed. She slowly relaxed and I cleaned up the incredible mess I'd just made of her. She pulled the pillow off and began gulping air as if she had been drowning. As she caught her breath she picked her head up and looked down at me. "You look like a kitten that's just finished an entire bowl of cream." She said grinning.I smacked my lips. "Surely not the entire bowl." I replied as I stood up and lifted her, turning her gently on the bed so she was laying comfortably in the center. I slid in next to her, she scooted over slightly and rolled up onto her side to make room. She leaned over and kissed me softly, still breathing hard."You're going to be the death of me.""Yea, but what a way to go." I smiled up at her and kissed her again. She began softly stroking my still hard cock."All tuckered out?" She asked.Without warning I rolled her onto her back, parted her thighs and sank deep into her. "Not at all. I was just letting you catch your breath."She wrapped her legs around me, lifting herself to meet each deep thrust. Our tongues began a slow tango as her hands roamed up and down my body."I can't even describe how incredible this feels." She gasped.I slipped my arm around her waist and lifted her from the mattress, pushing a pillow under her ass. The slight shift in angle had my cock sliding along her upper wall."Oh, oh, oh yes!" She cried, as I deliberately slowed down and pushed harder with each thrust. Her grip on me was getting to be too much, and I wasn't going to last much longer as I pumped away. She slid her hand down between us and began stroking her clit with quick fingers. It took only a moment before she started shaking, her legs clamping down and drawing me in as much as she could. Her walls contracting to milk me of every ounce I had to give. At that point I just leaned forward and erupted. Inhuman sounds escaped from deep in my throat. A long low guttural moan escaped Summer as she arched her back rising up to me. A few deep gasps and she collapsed back to the mattress, and I followed her, our mouths met, our tongues danced lightly as we tried to catch our breath. I slid to the side, breaking free of her lips for a moment and turned off the lamp.I woke early, pulled on my jeans and t-shirt quietly and made my way to the bathroom for a little relief. I walked out of the bathroom door to find Emily standing in what I guessed was her bedroom door. She rubbed her eye and just looked at me for a moment."Hi." She said softly.I stood there unsure of just what to say. "Hi." I replied nervously. The pause began to get uncomfortable."Are you done, can I get in there now?" She nodded towards the bathroom."Oh sure." I stepped aside quickly and she plodded her way in closing the door quietly. I closed my eyes taking a deep breath. I walked back down the hall into the kitchen and noted it was about my normal wake up time. So I scouted for coffee. Emily padded into the kitchen in her sweats and socks."What are you looking for?" She asked noting that I was peeking into different cupboards in search of the coffee."Coffee first, then I was going to make breakfast, if you want." I said."Can I help?" She asked. I just smiled and nodded. She pointed at a canister on the counter and smiled back. I opened it to find the coffee."How about we make something special?" I opened the fridge and rummaged and found the eggs and sausage Summer had mentioned. I found some veggies in the drawer and pulled those out too. My real find was a box of ready pie crusts. I detailed my plans with Emily and after extensive prep work of dicing and browning we placed a sausage and pepper quiche into the oven."Corn flakes are for chumps." She said looking at the door and smiled at me."Can you set the table while I wake up your mom?" I asked.She nodded. "I'd bring coffee and lead with that. She can be grouchy in the morning."I chuckled and poured a cup, topped it with a splash of milk and spoonful of sugar. I opened the door slowly and walked to the bed. Summer was curled up, her hair a golden splash across the pillow, her expression was strained."Don't try to fool me, that grin is a dead giveaway that you're not asleep." I said as she broke into a full smile and opened her soft blue eyes."Good morning.""Good morning pretty lady." I said as I set the coffee on the nightstand and leaned down to kiss her."If you don't mind, I've had to go to the bathroom for the last twenty minutes, but I didn't want to barge in on your bonding session." She slipped out of bed and grabbed a robe from the closet door and wrapped herself up and darted out of the room, leaving me chuckling. She didn't come right back and I was wondering what might be going on in the kitchen. I reached for the coffee cup as she walked back into the room shaking her head."What?" I asked.She just grinned at me. "Oh nothing, you know that old saying 'out of the mouths of babes'? Well mine just asked why you were spending money on a motel when you could stay here." Summer just looked up and laughed and shook her head again. "She's right though. If she took this as well as it seems then why don't you check out and come up here for the rest of your stay?"I just smiled. "I wouldn't want to intrude.""Intrude my ass. All you've done since you've been here is make life better." She walked over and sat next to me on the bed and kissed me. "The invitation is sincere, from both of us. Oh and you're timer is nearly up on the stove." My eyes went wide as kissed her and trotted out of the room to save breakfast.Em started giggling as she saw me jog into the kitchen to look at the stove. The timer still had seven minutes to go. I squinted at her. "Gonna be like that is it?" She burst into a bigger fit of giggles."You were right mom, he fell for it!" She yelled.A few minutes later Summer walked in wearing her college sweats and a long sleeve t-shirt, grinning ear to ear."I'd nearly forgotten that you're a gourmet chef, besides a fireman. What have you done with breakfast?" She asked."It's in the oven. It'll just be a few more minutes. Do you have any tomato sauce?" I asked."There's some in the pantry there I think." She said as she topped her coffee off.I found it and opened it up, pouring some into a bowl to warm up in the microwave. She looked at me sidelong not sure what to make of what I was doing."Okay shortcake, let's do this restaurant style, why don't we make a little assembly line here on the counter. Plates here, we need the spinach from the fridge, the bowl of sauce here, and do you have something to set the main course on?" She dug in a drawer and found a large pot holder and set it on the counter. As if on cue the timer went off. I checked in on it, and it was done. I slid it out and set it on the counter."That smells fantastic. You found that in my fridge?" She chuckled."The only special ingredient is imagination." I said as I winked at Emily who smiled and nodded. "Okay, so here's how we do it, do you know what the flag of Italy looks like?" Emily shook her head no. I sighed and rolled my eyes. "What are they teaching you kids in school these days? We're going to make the plates look like the Italian flag, green, white and red. So spinach on the side, then we're going to put a slice of the quiche in the middle for the white, and then a little sauce on the side for the red. Got it?""Yup." She took the first plate and piled a handful of the spinach on one side while I sliced the quiche, and set a slice just on the edge of the spinach."Okay, here's where we get all fancy." I whispered. "We take a little sauce and we make a little pool on this side. Don't tell anybody about this trick, everybody will be doing it." I said winking at her. Emily just rolled her eyes at me, the grin never leaving her face. "Two more like this and we have breakfast!"Emily made the other plates herself and set them on the table."A little more caffe for a me, we'll warm up Mama's, and for the signorina, the juice of one cow." I said pouring her a glass of milk. "Finito!"Summer started clapping, and I took a bow, and caught Emily out of the corner of my eye joining me. We sat down and began eating."Italy tastes really good." Emily said around a mouthful. Everybody nodded as we ate."Oh, did you tell her?" I said leaning over asking Em. She just looked at me wide-eyed. "Well the deal usually goes, the cook doesn't do the dishes." I said winking. Emily grinned and looked at her mother who in turn gave her a gimlet eye."So that was the deal? Why wasn't I given a vote in this plan?" She said.Emily replied with a shrug. "You were asleep." It was my turn to chuckle."That'll teach you to sleep in." I said. She gave me the same gimlet eye with a smile thrown in.When she finished Emily cleaned up after herself and put away the milk and the rest of the cold food without being asked. I looked at Summer who had a smug look on her face as she popped the last bite into her mouth."I'm going to get my stuff ready to go to Jesse's." Emily said as she headed for the hallway.Summer let out a quick, authoritative, "Hey," and raised an eyebrow at her, then looked at me and back. Emily rolled her eyes just like her mother and came back."Thank you for making breakfast..." she stumbled unsure what to call me.My eyes went wide. "Just call me Pete, and I should be thanking you for your artful assistance."She beamed and turned and took off up the hallway. I just watched her grinning as I sipped the dregs of my coffee. Music floated down the hallway a few seconds later as I pondered just how things had unfolded since I'd gotten here. I must have been lost in thought for a few minutes."Penny?" Summer asked, startling me out of my reflection."Sorry, I was just thinking how scared I was that this whole trip was a bad idea, and how everything has gone so right. I'm still worried that something bad is going to happen to screw it up. You know, like waking up and finding that I'm dreaming this."She ran her instep up my leg. "Don't go looking for trouble, it'll find you all by itself in time.""So what do you have planned for me tonight?" She asked."Oh a little dinner, maybe a show after." I grinned. "You have something nice to wear? No jeans, reservations are for seven o'clock." I said with a wink."I'll see what I can manage." She rolled her eyes."I can't wait." I said, the excitement in my voice coming through, bringing a smile to Summer's face."What's next for you today?" She asked."Let's see, I need to run back to my motel, pack and check out, stop by the dry cleaners, a couple errands. Most of all I want to start with a long hot shower." I said giving her a wink."That last one sounds good." Summer's eyes wandered to the hallway and back, and her expression changed, turning apprehensive as she crossed her arms over her chest."What's the matter?" I said as I took her arms and uncrossed them putting them on my hips."I don't know, it just feels weird. I feel like I've got to sneak around to have a life of my own."I laughed at that. "If we didn't scare her last night then I think she'll be fine. You just need," I paused and corrected myself, "We just need to be straight up honest with her. Show her that she's not being cut out of your life, but I'm joining both of yours, with any luck for a long time.""You'd better be planning on a long time. I'm not a love 'em and leave 'em kind of girl."I just raised an eyebrow at her for a moment, and she turned bright red and looked down."Okay there was that one time, but..." She began but I cut her off with a kiss."Mom, when you come up for air can you help me find my blue sweater?" Emily said as she walked into the kitchen.We both busted out laughing. "Yes dear. I am ever your willing servant." Summer replied rolling her eyes up at me and gave me another quick peck."Go get your stuff and get back here safe." She added as she made her way down the hallway.I got dressed and got ready to leave and wandered up the hall rapping on the door jamb before peeking around the corner of the door."I'll see you ladies in a little while." I said smiling."Hurry back, I want you to meet my friend Jesse when she gets here. She's really cool.""I'll do my best." I replied.To be continued in part 6, by Member389 for Literotica

M: 7. E: 7.

In this episode I go on a Style Journey with the English TV personality and Co-Founder of the wellness app Shoorah, the inimitable Ferne McCann. Ferne first became a public figure when she appeared in the hit reality series The Only Way is Essex (TOWIE) for no less than 9 series... She quickly became one of the standout stars on the show and led to her appearing on ITV's I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!, plus having her own ITVBe series, Ferne McCann: First Time Mum (2018) which later became Ferne McCann: My Family & Me. The show marked Ferne as one of the most trusted and relatable celebrity mums. In addition to her TV career, Ferne has become a successful entrepreneur, collaborating with premium global brands in the fashion, lifestyle, and wellness industries. Her influence on social media reflects her dedication to health, self-care, and family, inspiring her followers with a positive, relatable approach to modern motherhood. Ferne co-founded Shoorah, the wellness app that promotes personal growth & mental health. It is now one of the most successful apps in that genre. Ferne's healthy ambition for a new challenge saw her compete on Dancing on Ice in 2025, adding a new chapter to her career.Ferne is a true Essex girl born and bred and I ask her if she is stereotypical ... that is for you to discover... As such a well known star on Social Media I ask her how she deals with the inevitable trolling that comes with the profile and she offers a valuable and practical insight as to how she protects herself...in fact how we can all protect ourselves if we so choose. One of the things that is very endearing about Ferne is that she doesn't take herself too seriously, although she does admit to being "very competitive"... she laughs about her early elimination from Dancing on Ice and how her grandfather blamed it all on her choosing to be a Troll for the dance...however she was clearly blown away by the creativity of the costume team. Ferne clearly has a tight knit team around her including her mother, her "style icon". She bemoans the fact that social media has perhaps made us all less creative and more inclined to question our own tastes and follow the pack...to the extent of making us believe that we want something because we see it so frequently on different feeds...social media drives you to follow rather than stick with your own personal style...there is some truth in that...it certainly is the quickest way for brands to reach the widest audience possible now. She has been very open about her post-partum journey and how she has been an advocate for breast feeding, and continuing to breast feed. She understands that this can be a divisive subject but she is also very aware of the support it gives to many women at a similar point in their lives.We discuss the aging process, tweakments and her well documented rhinoplasty (nose job)... and the dilemma of staying totally true to herself and her audience yet being tempted to  "fix" her boobs post breast feeding... she is refreshingly transparent on the whole subject.  She is about to start her own podcast called Every Cloud, to talk about trauma and people's stories inspired by her own life and how "when you are in the thick of trauma it often bumps you into the right direction"...very true.Finally we had a properly hilarious disconnect moment in the Quick Fires when I ask her whether she preferred Boyfriends or Wide Legs...of course I was referring to her choice of jeans ...Ferne, on the other hand thought I was referring to Ahem something completely different...! I hope you enjoy this episode. Thank you Ferne for being such a great guest x Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Summer Arrives on the Atlantic Coast of Maine, in time for his first time.A 7-part series by Member389. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Stories. I was finally glad to be out of school. My buddy Jeff got out last year. He went off and joined the military and left our little town. I figured I'd work the summer here and see what was what after the tourists left. It was still early yet, they hadn't started arriving yet, clogging the roads with their luxury cars, acting as if they owned the place. Truth be told, they did. If it weren't for them, the rest of us wouldn't have a living. Fishing wasn't cutting it anymore, and the old quarries down coast were barely running now. Luckily we had the tourists.I walked down into the village near the docks, and popped into the little corner store."Hey Peter." I heard as I walked in. Paula nodded at me and smiled. She and her husband ran this little place, and did well by the locals and tourists alike. I waved and smiled at her as I headed to the back and grabbed a soda from the cooler."You headed over to see Davy about work?" She asked."Yea, I figure I gotta do something before mom tosses me out of the house." I chuckled."Would you do me a favor? Chip is out on a delivery and we're short-handed. Is there any chance you could make a delivery for me, it's on your way. The lady has an account so you don't need to collect any money. It's just, I heard she twisted her ankle on the beach and I told her that if she needed anything to call us and I'd get it over to her.""Sure, where is it going?" I said.She handed me two canvas sacks from the cooler, and gave me the address. It was just a couple blocks over from where I was headed. Paula refused to let me pay for my soda before leaving. I walked the few blocks turning up onto the driveway that led to a house facing the water. I walked around the house looking for the kitchen door. As I turned the corner I saw a woman lying on a towel on the lawn. She lay there basking in the morning sun completely naked. A small pile of fabric beside her looked like a swimsuit she may have been wearing. I stopped and looked around, the spot was well sheltered on the curve in the road. Her long blonde hair trailed out above her on her towel, her arms down at her sides, her deep pink nipples pointing up to the sun. Her stomach was flat and a little glint of something shiny hinted at a belly button ring. From this distance I couldn't be sure. A small strip of hair dipped down between her thighs. Her legs were long toned and pale, but getting red. She had just started tanning by the color she'd turned already. She was going to look like a freshly boiled lobster in a very short time.I realized she hadn't heard or seen me, so I turned and cleared my throat loudly. I looked over my shoulder, and she hadn't moved. I decided I'd just put the groceries in the house for her. I set the bags on the kitchen table and peeked to make sure nothing needed to be put in the icebox. Thankfully I did or the cold stuff would have spoiled. I put them away and left the rest. I walked towards the back door again and looked out the screen at her. She was beautiful, like she'd just stepped out of a magazine centerfold. She still hadn't moved, and it wouldn't be long before she burned badly. So I took it upon myself to rescue her, that's just the kind of guy I am. I opened the back door and pushed it open as far as possible and let it swing shut. The loud rap of the wood on the frame did the trick. She jumped, then the realization that somebody was near and she was naked came on her and she rolled onto the grass pulling the towel over her covering up. I saw why she hadn't heard me as an earbud fell out onto the grass.She peeked over the top of her big sunglasses, and in an accent I hadn't heard around here, she asked. "Can I help you?" The scolding tone of her voice saying that she didn't appreciate being peeked at while she was sunbathing.I scrunched up my face. "Where are you from?" I asked, curious about her accent."Right here buster, I'm renting this place. Where in hell did you come from?" She replied."Oh! Paula down at the market asked me to deliver your groceries. They were shorthanded and I was headed this way."She just stared at me for a moment, and I returned the stare taking in the scene with a dumb-founded look."Would you be a gentleman and please turn around?" She said a little testily. I did as she asked. Unfortunately for her I'd turned and was looking directly at her reflection in the kitchen window. She stood up cursing quietly, putting her weight on one foot, and wrapped the towel around her and tucked it in above her breasts. She was tall, and though her breasts weren't large they were nicely shaped, and red. The little stripe of hair ended neatly where I thought. The towel was just long enough to cover her modestly. She hobbled over to the little pile of cloth and swept up her bikini and started hobbling towards the house like a wounded animal. She passed me and got to the step and hobbled up the half step, and opened the door using it for stability and hopped up the step into the kitchen.She hobbled back to the screen door and said. "Well come on in."I walked over and stepped into the kitchen. She was sitting down on one of the chairs one leg splayed out in front of her the other tucked under the chair. The smooth skin was kissed with a flush of pink. I knew she was going to regret falling asleep out there later, but I'm glad I happened to wake her up so she didn't get severely burned. She was fumbling with her towel to keep it up, and digging through a big pocket book."Paula said that you have an account." I held up my hand. "I'm not going back to the store anyhow."She peeked up at me from her purse through a tangle of long blonde hair. "Thank you, but I was going to give you something for the trouble. She mentioned that you wouldn't be here until afternoon because it was busy today." A pink nipple peaked over the top of the polka dot beach towel. She caught me staring. "Though it could be surmised that you already got your tip." She said an eyebrow going up, and a small grin turning the corners of her mouth up. She shook her head as she pulled the towel back into place and tossed the purse onto the table. She held her arm out straight with a folded bill in it. I just shook my head once and waved it off."Thanks, but you don't need to do that." I said."Don't make me get up, my ankle hurts like hell, and I'm in no shape to use it to kick your ass for being a peeping tom." She replied grinning. She waved the money again. I shrugged and took it slipped into my jeans pocket. I was hoping she hadn't noticed they were tighter in front than a moment before."Thanks." I nodded."No, thank you Chip, I would have come into town to get them later but she insisted on having you deliver them."I smiled. "I'm not Chip. He was doing another delivery. I'm Pete.""Nice to meet you." She said holding out a hand. "I'm Summer."I shook her hand. She had a firm grip and didn't let up until I did. I just stood there for a moment looking at her. She had mesmerizing blue eyes and a crooked little smile. I realized I was staring when her brow went up. I felt myself blush."Are you thirsty? I could use something cold." Summer asked. I nodded."If you don't mind, there's a pitcher of iced tea in the fridge. I'm going to go put something on besides a towel.""Not on my account I hope?" Why not, I figured, she seemed to have a sense of humor about getting caught. I smiled over my shoulder at her as I reached for the cupboard door. She laughed aloud at that.She stood again, wobbling, and took her bikini in hand and walked towards the living room and gasped grabbing for the door jamb. In the process the towel let go and she stood there grasping the towel in one hand the door in the other. Her long smooth back tapered to a narrow waist and flared back out to beautifully curved hips. On her back was a pretty sunflower tattoo with vines around it. There looked to be a figure in the center of it."Oh to hell with it. I don't think I've got anything left to hide at this point." She muttered and hobbled out of the room. I opened up the freezer and got a tray of ice out, and filled the glasses. I heard her fumbling around a bit and she started to hobble back out. She'd pulled a light blue flowered sundress on, and taken a minute to brush out her hair. She hobbled over to an easy chair in the living room and sat down. "Would you be a doll and bring that in here?"I walked into the living room and she was gingerly setting her foot on the coffee table. I handed her a glass and set the other down. I took the towel she'd tossed on the sofa and folded it up into a little bundle and went to take her leg. I stopped myself and looked up at her, from under fallen bangs."May I?" I asked. She held her glass with both hands, licking tea from her upper lip, and nodded. I lifted her calf, the skin smooth and warm in my hand, and slipped the folded towel under her ankle to pad it from the table. I set it down carefully and she let out a sigh. I sat down on the sofa and took up my glass. I was looking into the glass at the ice cubes floating around. I set it back down and went to the kitchen, found a plastic bag and filled it with the rest of the ice. I looked down at her, she sat there wide eyed as I reached to carefully set it on her ankle."Thank you," She said softly, with a smile "again.""You slammed the door on purpose didn't you?" She asked."Well you were beginning to look like a lobster out there, fresh from the pot. I wasn't sure if you were asleep and I didn't want you to burn, or worse." I said.She smiled. "Thank you." She said, and after a moment she added, "West Virginia.""Rockport here, welcome to Maine." I toasted her with my tea, and we clinked glasses. Neither of us said anything we just sat there enjoying our tea."You said this was on your way? Where were you going?" Summer asked."I was headed down to Davy's marina down the road." I said. Then pointed. "If you go down Sea Road and bear right. He runs a couple of boats for fishing, sightseeing and whale watching. I was going to see if he needed any help this summer."She nodded, and looked down at her ankle. Water running down her leg from the condensation on the bag."If he doesn't give you a job on a boat, you might want to consider going to medical school." She chuckled. "You're a quick thinker and have a gentle touch. I don't mean to keep you from where you were headed but since this is really feeling like hell." She pointed at her foot. "I was wondering if you could do me another favor before you leave.""Sure, what else do you need, lunch?" I asked.She laughed. "Well that would be nice, but I was just going to ask you to go into the bathroom and grab the ace bandage that's rolled up on the counter and the bottle of pain killers for me. I want to get this wrapped again, now that I'm not worried I'll look like a cat with one white paw."I set my glass down, and went to the bath and found the items. I found a bottle of sunburn lotion on the counter and brought that too."I see you came prepared to burn." I looked at the bottle."Well when you're as white as I am, it happens often, especially this early in the season." Summer said as she reached up for the items. She reached down and took the ice off, and dried her foot off on the towel. She crossed her legs, her dress riding up high as she reached to start unrolling the bandage.I laughed. "That looks more awkward than a lobster trying to climb a tree." I reached out for the bandage and took it from her. "Let me show you how it's done." I sat on the edge of the coffee table and laid her leg across mine. I wrapped her ankle neatly slipping the clips on at the end with a flourish. I looked at her toes peeking up, the nails a sparkly pink color. A small throat clear broke me out of my reverie, only to notice that I'd been absently stroking her shin and calf. I snatched my hand away, and felt my face turn bright red again. I looked down at the rug and apologized."For what? Doing a better job than I would wrapping my ankle? Or maybe the lame lobster jokes." She flipped a hand at me and took the bottle and popped it open. She poured out her dose and knocked them back with a swallow of her tea."I should take these with food." She took her foot off my lap and set it gingerly on the floor, grabbing the arms of the chair preparing to get up."Whoa! Where are you going?" I asked."I was going to go see what was in those bags to eat." She said."Sit down. I'll get you something." I answered quickly.She rolled her eyes at me. "You've done far more than you should have for a tired, broken down old lady." She rolled forward again, and I put my hand on her shoulder to keep her balance back."I'll get it." I said firmly. "What would you like?""You are too sweet." She said, relaxing back into the chair. "What did you bring?"I went into the kitchen to rummage through the bags. Given a little creativity and a few minutes time I whipped up a sandwich and chips. I peeked around the door jamb to ask if she wanted mustard or mayo on her turkey. The sight that greeted me stopped me in my tracks. Summer had sat forward on the chair, and slipped the straps off the sundress pushing it down to her waist. She sat there slowly rubbing in the sunburn cream into her skin. She finished her arms and began working on her chest rubbing slowly giving each nipple a pinch and tug. My jeans felt about ready to explode at the sight of her. I popped my head back around the door and called out asking my question. She replied, mustard. I responded that it was ready then, to give her time to cover up.I walked into the room with the plate in front of me and the bag of chips dangling beneath to try and hide my arousal. I sat quickly as I handed her the plate, hoping I'd covered myself well enough."Ooh thanks!" She said setting the plate down and reaching for half the sandwich. She just stopped and looked at me. "You didn't make one for yourself?" I shook my head. "Here," she handed me the other half, "I hate eating alone."I shrugged and took the other half, and we ate quietly. I asked her how she twisted her ankle. Exploring wet rocks on the outbound tide, she'd slipped and thought she'd broken it. She had gotten an X-ray and it was only a bad sprain."Ironic. I ended up having to postpone starting work at the very hospital that I was going to be starting at next week." She said."Oh? You a doctor?" I asked."RN, and I was serious earlier, you have a gentle touch, and you wrap a mean ankle." She followed with a smile."Sports." I said by way of explanation. She nodded.She opened her mouth laying a chip on her tongue and took it in whole giving it a crunch. I didn't know why, but she fascinated me on an entirely new level. I'd seen naked girls before, well in magazines and movies, anyway. Here sat a woman who, unlike those from around here, wasn't scandalized by having her body admired. This isn't the end of the world, but not far from it."How old are you Pete." She asked. I told her the truth, that I was nineteen, and I'd just graduated last month. She offered me the chips, and I took a few."What are your plans from here?" She asked."I honestly don't know. I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up." I said chuckling.She set the chips aside and wiped her hands on the towel. She took up the bottle of cream and popped the cap up. She nonchalantly pulled up the hem on her dress to a nearly indecent level and leaned forward and began rubbing the cream into her leg. She continued to ask me about the area, what there was to do after school got out. She worked her hand further up her thigh, the warm pink flesh supple under her fingers. She pulled back again, the hem of the dress slid up, and a peek of pink lace appeared. She asked if I had a girlfriend. Which made me pause. She started on the other leg working from the ankle up to the knee. She stopped and looked at me when I didn't reply."No?" She asked, no doubt noticing that I'd been watching every movement she made.I just shook my head looking down at the floor. "No. I've gone out a few times, but never really had a girlfriend."She looked down her leg again, massaging her up her thigh slowly. Watching her was not helping the situation in my jeans one bit."That's too bad. Seems an awful waste of resources if you ask me." She smirked."Huh?" I said looking up at her with a quizzical look.She bit her lower lip and looked me in the eye for a moment, then down at my lap, and nodded.I must have turned deep red, she looked up at me and smiled, then busted out laughing."Oh my God! You're as innocent as the day you were born, aren't you?" She asked grinning ear to ear.I stammered."Oh hell." She waved her hand. "Don't be embarrassed hon. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get you a hard time." She reached over and gave my wrist a quick squeeze. The feel of her warm hand sent a shock up my arm. She leaned back in the chair, not bothering to adjust her dress. The little pink lace peeking out kept drawing my eye. I could feel her eyes studying me as I tried not to look.She started softly. "Am I the first woman you've ever seen naked?" She followed with, "in person?"I cleared my throat. "Well, that close, yea." I said softly. "Last summer, my friend and I found a cove where some girls go to tan in the summer, but we stay well back. They mostly only took their tops off. Jeff had binoculars." I felt my ears turn red.Summer smiled again biting her lip. "So, the peeping tom thing isn't new." She giggled. She was enjoying teasing me. A moment of silence passed while I looked anywhere but at her. "Stand up Pete, and come here." I looked at her and did as she asked. She slowly reached up, and tugged the straps of her dress to the side, and looped her arms up through, pushing it down her torso. Her breasts popped free, the cherry red nipples stiff in the cool breeze coming through the house. She looked up at me from under a lock of hair, still biting her lip. Time seemed to stop, and I wasn't sure what to do next, but instinct pushed me to reach out and cup her breast. It was warm and soft in my hand, and I stroked it gently. I reached up with my thumb and rubbed the nipple. A sigh as she inhaled deeply, her eyes were closed while I explored. I rolled it between my thumb and finger it was as hard as a pencil eraser."That feels nice." She said softly. I stroked the curve up to her chest, and back down between them following it around.Time started again when I jumped back startled. I hadn't expected it when her hand reached up and pressed against the front of my jeans."Oh!" She giggled. "I didn't mean to scare you. I just thought you might enjoy a little rub too." She nodded at my jeans. "Let me see it."I went wide eyed like a deer in caught in headlights."Come on. It's only fair, you saw mine." She urged. Her hand slid down raising the hem of her dress showing off the pink lace panties with black lace trim. She circled the front with her finger, pressing as she did. She reached over and took the last swallow of her tea and caught an ice cube from the glass. Swirling it around her mouth. She opened her mouth showing me that she was rolling the cube around with her tongue.Without conscious thought my hands reached for my zipper to release the pressure built up behind it. I pulled it down as she watched intently. I unbuttoned the fly of my boxers and the pressure was gone as my hard cock pushed its way out seeking relief.Summer made an approving sound deep in her throat at the sight of it. "Ooh that's nice." The ice cube clicked on her teeth and she crushed it quickly, chewing the bits of ice. She looked up at me and made a come hither motion with her free hand, the other still working on the pink lace. I stepped forward as if she were drawing me towards her with an invisible tether. She reached up slowly this time and took me gently into her hand. Stroking the shaft and rubbing the tip with her thumb. I gasped, my breath coming in short panting breaths. "That's it, easy now." She said in a soothing voice, as if calming a frantic animal. "You aren't going to last very long."My body was humming like a taut wire as she gently stroked me. In a move that surprised me, she leaned forward and took me into her mouth. The cold sensation from her chewing the ice nearly pushed me over the top. I gasped. She licked my cock like a kid with an ice cream cone, her icy tongue dragging away at me. I knew I was about to cum, and she did too. She stepped up the pace of her licking, and took me into her mouth once more sliding down further until I lost it. I felt my hips jerk forward and she put her hand on my thigh to keep me from choking her. I grabbed for the first thing at hand, and it happened to be the back of her head, and I erupted. My body stiffened as I gasped for air. I felt as if she was drawing me inside out. I exploded in her mouth, her tongue cleaning up the mess I'd made."Is that the first time a girl has done that to you?" She asked softly, lapping my still hard cock. I nodded between gasping breaths."You poor thing. Have you ever thought of what it would be like to lick a girl down there?" She asked innocently. I looked down to find her fingers had slipped into the panties and were making deep circular motions. I had to think, because if I hadn't before now, I certainly was beginning to. She kept darting her tongue out, giving me soft licks and quick flicks with her tongue and thought I could do that.She stood up awkwardly not putting her weight on her bad ankle, and reached up beneath her sundress tugging at the fabric. Soon her panties were around her knees. She turned and tossed the towel onto the chair and spread it out."Oh screw it." She said pushed down the fabric of her sundress as it slid over her hips. She sat down pushing her dress and panties off and tossed them on the couch. She leaned back on the chair as I watched her chest rise and fall with her slow deep breathing. My eyes followed down her taut stomach, a small silver heart dangled from her belly button on a chain. My eyes scanned further down and found the top of her little narrow strip, the soft tuft of dark blonde hair leading to deep pink lips. I stood there with my mouth hanging open as she set her leg back up on the coffee table, opening up a little more for me. I licked my dry lips, which must have been a sign."That's what I like to see. A willing student." She smiled and winked at me. "Grab a pillow and kneel down. I'll give you a quick lesson on the special anatomy of a girl." She chuckled. I did as she asked and knelt before her. She proceeded to point out the highlights softly, in an encouraging voice. Explaining how best to please a woman down there.I leaned forward, my nose filling with the scent of her. I reached forward licking upward between her spread fingers. She let out a deep sigh and I began licking and nibbling. I tilted my head up and began swirling her clit with my tongue like she'd done to my cock. She threw her head back and her jaw dropped as a low moan escaped her lips.She panted quickly. "Slip your finger inside me, and make a come here motion." She mimed it with one finger.I did as she asked, slipping my middle finger into her as far as I could. It was wet, and warm and I could feel her tighten down on me. I started off slowly stroking in and out of her, then remembered how she'd shown me and I rubbed up and forward and back again. I had forgotten what I was doing and noticed she'd reached down to start stroking her clit with incredible speed. I leaned down putting my tongue to it again, and began flicking it with my tongue as fast as I could. Summer arched up off the chair and began yelling, 'Oh my God.' She stayed that way for nearly a minute before collapsing back into the chair gasping for air. My hand was soaked with her juices. I wasn't sure, but I figured I'd done well. I used the corner of the towel to wipe my hand. I looked at her swollen, wet and deep pink lips and just leaned forward and began lapping up the mess she'd made, slowly with the tip of my tongue. She inhaled sharply and her legs came together quickly."Easy there." She said pushing my head away gently. "It's very sensitive after." She released the grip she had of my hair and ran her fingers through it. She was just looking at me smiling while I licked my lips."So how did I do teach?" I asked.She chuckled. "I'd say you did pretty damn well for a first-timer. I'll give you an A plus for effort and an A for technique." She smiled. I was hard as a rock, and wondered if I was going to be allowed to follow through with the next thing that came to my mind."Are you a typical young guy with a raincoat in your wallet?" She asked, reading my mind. I looked at her with my quizzical look again. She just rolled her eyes and shook her head. I sighed looking down, and shook my head slowly. I got a slightly scolding look in reply. I wasn't sure if it was because I didn't have one, or that she was unhappy about it as well."Get up." She said giving a slight push to my forehead. I leaned back and stood in a single motion. I nearly fell over backwards when I realized I still had both legs caught with my jeans around my knees. Summer leaned forward to grab my arm and help me balance. She nodded down at them and without saying a word let me know that I should get them off. She gripped my hand solidly and pulled herself carefully out of the chair and hobbled a step aside. She reached down taking the rumpled beach towel off the chair and flipped it in half and lay it on the center cushion of the sofa. She turned me back to and gave me a push so I fell back onto it."Don't move." She said leveling a serious gaze at me. She hobbled back off to the bedroom. A little rustling later she came back with something closed in her fist. She pulled the coffee table up close and sat gently on the edge of it facing me."First things first. It's never her responsibility to make sure you're prepared." She said holding up a little foil packet. "If you aren't prepared, then keep it in your pants, or her hand if you're lucky enough." She smiled. "The only time it'll be up to her to help is now. If she'd like to." She reached forward and began slowly stroking me, her fingers firm and soft at the same time. "You see, you can't wrap the rascal unless he's primed and ready." She smiled. "I'll show you how best to use this so you don't end up a daddy too soon, or worse."I smiled and rolled my eyes."Hey, we can stop right now if you like." She said levelly at me. The shock on my face must have been plain as day. "That's what I thought." She smiled and looked down at my hard cock. "I'd hate to stop now myself." She peeled the wrapper down the side pulling out the little ring. She held it close for me to see. "See how it's rolled up? Place it with the rolled side up over the tip like this." She reached holding my cock in one hand and setting the condom on the tip. "Unroll gently down the shaft like this." She said sliding her fingers down my shaft unrolling it fully. "All the way down. That's important since she's not going to want to fish the thing out of her if it comes off in the middle of your good time. It also makes it pretty useless if that happens." She gave the base of my cock a little squeeze. She pulled my knees together, and stood up kneeling on the sofa straddling me."This is a good position for us to start with. It gives a woman the ability to control the depth and speed with which you entering her. Missionary isn't bad, but if you get a little over zealous it can end up hurting her. If you want to her to ever want you back in her again then it's best to make sure she has a good time too." She said reaching down between us she ran her finger up and down her swollen lips."Remember to open her gently beforehand, the more care you take with her, the more likely she'll be calling you for more." She sat up, and lined herself up over my cock and took my shoulders as I took her by the hips. She looked down at me for a moment, one eyebrow going up."Oh." I said reaching between us and stroking her still wet lips placing fingers on either side and gently opening her up. As I did she lowered herself on me. The sigh that escaped my lips was loud. I nearly passed out from the feeling of the warmth and tightness, as she slowly rode the entire way down my length. A soft purr came from her throat.She sat there for a moment and proceeded to just tighten herself around me and relax. I started pushing urgently with my hips."Easy does it." She whispered into my ear then licked her way down nibbling the lobe and kissing my neck. "A woman's nipples are very sensitive, and shouldn't be neglected." She took my hand and ran it up to her small breast. Lifting it away slightly and rubbing her nipple with my fingers. She bit her lower lip as I took the hint and stroked her breasts and rolled the nipples between my fingers. I leaned forward taking it in my mouth rolling it around, lashing it with my tongue. Summer sighed deeply and rolled her hips forward and started rising up and lowering herself on me. My other hand found its way behind her gripping her ass and pulling her down onto me with each stroke. She started a long deep stroking rhythm that I thought was going to drive me over the top again. She must have noticed my urgency as my hips rose to meet her down stroke hard. She stopped on an upstroke and let me slip out of her and I thought I was going to die when my eyes popped open pleading with her. She smiled at me."What's your hurry? Aren't you enjoying yourself?" She said sweetly.I nodded furiously. "Yes I am." I gasped."Good. The journey can be as much fun as the destination, so take your time." She got off the couch. I looked at her pleading with her not to stop now. "Let's see how well you improvise." She said.She turned around and knelt down on the pillow that was on the floor, and leaned forward setting her elbows on the chair she was sitting in before. Her beautiful ass, up in the air her lips open and pouting in invitation. I scrambled off the couch and knelt behind her, nearly ready to drive my cock into her when I paused and opened her up slipping back into herShe whipped her hair over one shoulder and looked at me over the other. "You're in the drivers' seat now. It's going to be up to you to be aware of the clues a girl is giving you. If she's pulling away from you, you're fucking her to hard. If she's pushing against you, well she wants you to put the pedal to the metal, so to speak." I pushed forward feeling myself fall into her and never wanting to leave. I began pushing and she met me stroke for stroke as I sped up. I couldn't take it any longer. Summer let out several long high pitched moans followed by a gasping, 'Harder!' and I went into overdrive. Plunging her depths with abandon I finally drove her forward hard, pushing her hips against the chair as I exploded. I stiffened as I felt every ounce of strength drain from my body. Summer shuddered hard in my hands bringing me out of my daze."Are you okay?" I gasped between breaths.She rose up slightly, hair a complete mess covering her face. She started to laugh, gasping for air. "I was just thinking, this vacation started off lousy, but it's improving nicely."I chuckled. "Welcome to Maine, Vacationland." She busted out laughing at that. I backed away falling free of her, the cool breeze came in from the screen, cooling the sweat on my skin."Let's get cleaned up." She stood shakily, with the help of the arms of the chair. I stood as well. She turned and slipped an arm around my shoulders. "Help me to the bathroom, would you please?" I looked at her, and turned slightly and reached down picking her up off the floor. She let out a whoop of surprise. "I only needed a shoulder to lean on honestly." She said smiling."So lean on it." I said smiling. I negotiated the narrow path to the bathroom and brought her in careful not to bang her against the doorjamb. I set her on a little stool next to a big claw foot bathtub."Let me get that." Summer reached over and popped up a tissue and reached up sliding the condom off of me and wrapping it and tossing it in the trash. She looked up at me, her hair still a mess. I reached down pushing it off her forehead. She smiled. "Grab a washcloth for me, would you please?" She nodded at a small shelf, and I took one down and handed it to her. She reached over to the bath running water onto it and a little squirt of her bath gel. She frothed it up and began washing herself off. She rinsed and repeated. She dried herself with another towel hanging from the bar. She looked up at me from under her bangs, scanning down. "Really?" She said in a resigned voice as she saw that I was once again ready.I shrugged. "The benefit of youth?"She laughed. "I guess!"She rinsed the cloth again and began gently washing me with it. The cool water and warm hands were soothing but not doing a thing for the fact that it was loaded and ready to go yet again."Would you hand me that light blue bottle there." She asked. She poured a small amount into her palm and set the bottle aside. She rubbed the oil between her hands and rubbed it between her legs oiling herself up. The sight of this was not doing me any good either. A crooked smirk spread across her face as she watched me watching her in fascination.She reached up with her oily hand and began stroking my shaft. The hardness slipping through her firm grip with little friction. The other hand began fondling my balls. They were already tight, and ready to go again. She slid her hand further under and began massaging me underneath in a tight circle. The feeling blew my mind as I couldn't contain myself and came hard, with a loud splatter, on Summer's chest."Not sure if it's good for burns, but I've heard it does wonders for the skin." She said, leaning forward cleaning the last few drops off with her tongue. She then used her cloth to wipe up the cum I'd splashed on her chest.. I just watched her, her movements so graceful and efficient.She looked up at me with a smirk. "Pete, how would you like to give me a hand for a couple weeks while this ankle heals?"My eyebrows went up. "How?" I asked."The usual mow the lawn, grocery runs, cleaning, maybe even an occasional turkey sandwich. It'll allow me to keep off this as much as possible and not feel like I'm an invalid. I'll warn you now though it's not only doctors that make lousy patients."It was my turn to smirk. "What's it pay?" I asked wiggling my eyebrows.Her mouth dropped open. "You little shit! I'm not hiring you to be a gigolo!" She laughed. "But there's always the possibility of a bonus. I could continue your lessons. Practice makes perfect they say." She smiled at that."I don't know." I said, my spent cock hanging inches from her lips. Oh I knew alright, but I played along. "I'll have to see what Davy has to offer this year. Those rich folks that come in to fill up can be pretty good tippers too."She raised an eyebrow at me again. "Okay if you'd rather work for him I'll understand." She said in mock resignation. She stood on her good foot, testing the floor with her bad. I instinctively wrapped my arm around her waist."You drive a hard bargain." I said pulling her to my side so she could put her arm over my shoulder.She looked me up and down me and smiled. "This vacation isn't turning out bad at all."To be continued in part 2, by Member389 for LiteroticaSummer In Maine: Part 2Lesson Two, and Two and a half.A 7-part series by Member389. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Stories.This summer job wasn't turning out the way I'd thought. So far I'd mowed the lawn, done the dishes, (thankfully there's a dishwasher) hauled trash, done laundry, dusted and vacuumed. When Summer asked if I wanted to help her out for a few weeks I sort of expected there would be fringe benefits to go with, or instead of, getting paid. Instead it was actual work. She wasn't shy, about her body or mine, she often would wrap her arm around my waist to help with her balance. She occasionally stroked my ass through my jeans. I didn't hesitate to return the favor but I always ended up with only a smile in return. I figured after that first day when I took the job I might get some more personal time with her. The other night I helped her to run a bath, and she shooed me out of the bathroom. One night we watched a late movie I slept over, and ended up on the couch. Something didn't seem right about all of this. Nearly a week had gone by, and it was as if that first day hadn't even happened, and I was too shy to say anything. I hitched the grocery bag I was carrying a little higher, tonight, I'd say something tonight.I walked up to the kitchen stoop and pulled open the screen door and I heard a gasping cry. I dropped the bags on the table and darted into the living room, she wasn't there. Another cry, and I looked to the right and saw the bedroom door was open. I walked quietly towards the door, and Summer was laying back on the bed naked except for her bandaged ankle. She was sliding a pink vibrator up and down between her thighs. She tilted it slightly and slid it into her, her other hand pulling on her nipple. I was instantly hard watching her pleasure herself. She let go of the nipple and slid her hand down and began flicking her clit, rubbing it fast. She arched her back crying out "Yes!" She pulled the vibrator out slipping her fingers in as she came. She continued rubbing her clit slowly and stroked her fingers in and out for a few before falling flat to the sheets like a deflated balloon. Her breathing was fast and shallow."How long have you been watching?" She asked, not looking up. She looked absolutely radiant, her skin flushed pink through her tan. Her hair was a tangled mess of sun streaked gold, she looked fantastic."Just a couple minutes." I said quietly looking down at the floor. I heard the old brass headboard creak and I peeked up. She had raised her head and was looking at me."What's the matter?" She asked gently. I shrugged and walked out to the kitchen, and started putting away the groceries."I picked up some local shrimp for lunch. I'll put them on ice in the fridge." I said loudly from the kitchen. I turned and Summer was leaning against the doorway to the kitchen watching me with her arms crossed in front of her, buck naked. She gave me a shrewd glance."Please tell me what's bothering you."I looked at her for a moment, then turned away and put a couple other items in the fridge."Nothing." I said, unconvincingly."It's just..." I started. I looked over at her and said."Never mind." I walked out to the yard looking around to see if I should mow the lawn again already or not. I heard the screen door bang shut behind me. I felt her hand on my shoulder as she stepped up beside me."I love it here. The salty sea air, the big sky, everything seems so much simpler." She said softly. I instinctively wrapped my arm around her waist, her skin was warm and damp."Why?" I asked softly."Why what, Pete?" She asked with surprising sincerity. "Why haven't we had sex since Monday? Is that what you want to know? Are you asking me if you were a one afternoon-stand? What Pete? Ask me." She urged.Her words inflamed me and my frustration flared. "Yes!" I turned to face her, her arm sliding down from my shoulder. "Was I just a one shot deal? Screw me, then have me cook and clean for you?" I immediately sensed I'd gone too far and full well expected a slap. I'd deserve it if she did. I opened my eyes wide.She stood there looking at me, her eyes smoldering. She coolly pointed out. "Which one of us is the one standing here naked?" I stood there a moment longer, every muscle in my body taut like a drawn bow. I snapped and took hold of her and kissing her hard as our lips parted, tongues lashing out at each other like sparring fencers. Her arms wrapped around my waist pulling us together."Damn, I thought I you'd never come around." She said between kisses. I leaned back and gave her a queer look."What?" I asked, completely confused. She grinned ear to ear."Lesson number 2, confidence is sexy. Hell it took me walking around naked to get your damned attention. What the hell is wrong with you?" She bopped me on the forehead. I shrugged, feeling completely confused. I had no idea what she was talking about."This exercise, which you nearly failed miserably I might add, was to see if you would take the lead. I personally tend to be a bit passive. Therefore, as the guy, you need to learn to take the lead, just like dancing." She held my hand up and snugged her hand around my back and gave a little sway."The other night when you fell asleep on the couch I laid awake waiting for you for nearly an hour. I finally took matters into my own hands, maybe I should have made more noise.""I knew girls were crazy. I honestly was hoping to get more insight from you, not more confused." I said smiling. "You were waiting for me?""You haven't seen crazy yet, give me a week." She winked.I groaned, then kissed her again, holding her against me, my hands stroking down her back to her ass massaging it as I pulled her to me. Holding her was like holding a flame, seductive, hypnotizing and hot, and I didn't care if I got burned."Tell me you've had the good sense to pick up some protection." Summer mumbled between kisses. Without breaking our kiss I reached back for my wallet and held it up."Please tell me you bought more than one." She growled. I felt her hands come between us resting on the waist of my jeans unbuttoning them and grabbing for the zipper. She pushed my jeans and boxers down far enough for me to escape captivity. She let out an appreciative hum as she ran her hand up and down my hardened length. She broke our kiss long enough to grab the hem of my polo shirt and drag it up pulling it over my head. She leaned down and took one of my nipples into her mouth. I gasped out loud at how the sensation shot through me. It felt as if my cock was getting even harder and I didn't think that was possible."Holy shit! Does it feel this way when I do this to you?" I gasped.She hummed an agreement as she switched to the other side, then stepped back and looked at me smiling.I stood dumb-founded for a moment. I quickly realized she was waiting for me to do something. She placed her hands on her hips and gave them a slight tilt. "I'm all yours, all you need do is tell me how you'd like me, or better yet, show me." She winked. I kicked off my shoes and pushed my pants the rest of the way off and looked at her for a moment. The sun kissed her body so exquisitely, her pink nipples hard and pointing straight at me. Her hair was blowing in the breeze surrounding angelic face like a golden halo. I stepped forward, wrapped her up in my arms again and kissed her deeply. I ran my hand up between us taking her breast in my hand cupping it twirling the nipple in my fingers. I work my mouth down her jaw, kissing her neck and I feel her shudder and gasp. I moved down the center of her chest trailing kisses to the other nipple and teased it with my tongue before taking into my mouth suckling it gently. A moan escaped her lips. Her hand was pulling me towards her, fingers running through my hair. I wanted her so badly but I didn't want this to end. I pulled away looking up at her face, her mouth hung open her eyes half closed."Your ankle has to be killing you right now." I said, noting she'd been standing for a while now. I walked over and brought one of the Adirondack chairs over and set it behind her and she smiled. I laid my clothes on it to keep her from burning her ass on the sun heated wood. She just looked at me without sitting. "Sit down." I told her, and she tilted her head in assent and sat. I knelt down in front of her and kissed her nipple again and began trailing kisses down her stomach. She took the cue and leaned back on the chair. I flicked her little belly button ring aside and licked her belly button. She let out a whoop and jumped, chuckling."Ticklish?" I chuckled. She grasped a handful of my hair and gave me a little push further down, but I was going at my own pace and I made my way down nuzzling her little blond stripe. I kissed my way around her pouting lips, my tongue darting out giving little licks. She tasted sweet, the scent of her was driving me mad, I couldn't take it any longer and slipped my tongue into her as I massaged her clit.She arched her back and moaned. "Yes!" I lapped up to her clit taking it in my lips and giving it due attention. Her cries got louder and I stepped up the assault on her. Her leg came up over my shoulder and she pulled me hard into her with her heel. I let up a bit, I didn't want this to end too soon, it seemed that I wasn't the only one enjoying it. I slipped my middle finger into her, and felt her grip it tightly. Her hips started rocking forward. I was pretty sure I could finish her off quickly if I had a mind to, but I didn't. I continued bathing her clit, varying the pressure on it. She let out a few short gasps. "Please?!" She begged. I knew then I had to finish her and slipped another finger in to join the first and intensified my tongue lashing. Her hips lifted off the chair as she climaxed. She held on to me, still moaning, finally collapsing back into the chair panting."You sir, are a natural." She gasped. I returned her smile and licked my fingers."Am I mistaken, or is there a very hard cock in my immediate future?" I grinned even wider and nodded. "How would you like me?""Over hard." I said smiling. Her eyes lit up like a fire had been kindled."Well then, dig that little party hat out and show me how easy it is to put on."I chuckled and dove for my wallet lying on the grass a few feet away. I dug out the foil wrapper and crawled back. I tore open the packet holding the ring carefully and reaching down, putting in place and unrolled it carefully."Very good." She said her eyes flashing. She stood up and knelt down on the grass facing the chair. "Over like this? I'm sure you'll supply the 'hard' part." She added with a wink."Yes." I said, my breath shallow. I had to have her and scooted up behind her and lined up pushing the head in. I took her hips and pushed forward in a single motion burying myself in her.We both gasped loudly. In moments she started moving her hips back and forth and I pulled out and began taking slow strokes at first, but I knew I wasn't going to last. She leaned back pushing hard against me and I responded in kind driving forward, the sound of our bodies coming together pushed me into a frenzy. Her gasps were coming in short cries of, "Yes!" She began shaking in my hands, her moans coming from deep in her throat as she arched back into me and climaxed again pushing me over the edge. I drove her forward nearly knocking her and the chair over as I stiffened arching my back. I froze in place for what seemed an eternity, and not long enough both at the same time as I came deep in her.She leaned back against my chest, the heat of her skin against me was incredible, she reached behind us grasping my ass pulling our hips tight together. "I love how you feel inside me." She whispered. I leaned down and began kissing her shoulder, working my way up to her neck and nibbled on her ear."I love how you feel too." I said, my voice a little weak.She breathed a deep contented sigh. "What now?" A small smirk spread across her lips."I don't know about you but I worked up an appetite." I said. "Those shrimp sound good about now.""All this and you cook too. You're not going to be single long." She chuckled and reached up behind her and stroked my cheek. "I think we may need to move for that though." She said lightly, reminding me that I still had her pinned against the chair. I leaned back, pulling free of her. I stood stepping back, I gathered up my clothing. Summer put her good foot down and stood, steadying herself on the arms of the chair. "Let's go clean up and have lunch." She smiled slipping an arm around my waist and we went into the house.I started a pan for the shrimp, a little olive oil, some garlic and some red pepper flakes tossed on top of fresh spinach. My killer homemade vinaigrette to top and she would be mine. Well she already seemed to be. I stopped and stared out the little window above the sink out over the water. That thought caught me by surprise. What exactly was going on here? An hour ago I was pissed off for being shunned, now I was making her lunch with a silly, satisfied grin on my face.Summer hobbled into the kitchen wearing a pale blue tank top and panties with little pink hearts on them."Don't you own pants?" I asked smiling."Sure, would you rather I be fully dressed, or comfortable?" She asked."Oh I don't mind your outfit, as long as you don't mind your lunch burnt to a crisp." I laughed."What are you making?" She replied chuckling."I'm going to woo you with my culinary skills. My own special shrimp and spinach salad with homemade vinaigrette." I said."Wow, sounds awesome. You're a man of many talents. I think you're a little late in the wooing department though." She said smiling.My chest tightened at that. Nobody ever thought of me as a man before. Everybody has always treated me as a kid until now. The shock of it must have been evident in my expression."What?" She asked, her eyes widening. I didn't answer her, I just leaned forward and kissed her softly, she responded in turn."Nothing." I said, my grin returning."Need a hand?" I handed her two lemons with directions to squeeze the hell out of them then juice them for me into a bowl. I diced up the shallot, and garlic tossing them into the big bowl, salt and pepper followed. In went a huge dollop of spicy mustard, I looked at how much juice Summer had squeezed out of the lemons and eyeballed it pouring it into the bowl, straining out the seeds. I dug a whisk out of the drawer and started whisking in olive oil."Most vinaigrette recipes ask for vinegar, obviously. I like mine with lemon juice, especially with seafood." I said. I stopped whisking dribbling a little onto my finger to try it. "That's the ticket." I said offering a taste to Summer who agreed with a little sound. I set the big bowl aside and had her start splitting the cherry tomatoes. The shrimp were rinsed and patted dry on a towel, and I threw some garlic into the pan starting it with some of the olive oil. I salted and peppered the shrimp and in they went tossing them around to coat them all with the hot oil. They were ready in a couple minutes and the kitchen smelled terrific. I stacked the plates with spinach and started building the salads with the tomatoes, red onions, shrimp and as a topper sliced almonds."If this tastes like it looks, you're staying on as cook after this heals." She said lifting her foot behind her."Prepare to have your mind blown." I said handing her a plate and a fork. I had brought a small baguette with me which I'd sliced up and we ate."A girl could get used to this." She smiled popping a shrimp into her mouth. Cooking for a girl is a sure way into her panties."I laughed. "Even if she wasn't wearing any?""Well she's wearing some now." Her eyes flashed."But for how long?" I said playing along."You have your driver's license don't you?" She asked, changing the subject."Yea, I just don't have a car of my own yet." I said, wondering why she asked."Do you know of anybody that would loan you one, like your folks?""Yea I'm sure I can get one. Why, do you want to do it in the backseat?" I wiggled my eyebrows at her."Hell yea, but I'd also like to get a ride to go get my Jeep. It's been down at the clinic for a week now. They told me it would be safe but I'm getting a little stir crazy stuck here in the house." She replied.I looked out the window. "I can ride down and bring it back, it's only about four or five miles." I said."Ride?" She asked."I have a bike, I can put it in the back and haul it back if you don't mind.""Not at all." She smiled.I did the dishes and cleaned up after lunch, and Summer kicked back on the sofa folding a load of laundry I'd done earlier. I took a look at the grass, yea the lawn could wait a couple more days. "What else needs to be done?" I asked from the kitchen. I got no answer. I walked into the living room and she was bobbing her head as I walked around the edge of the couch I noticed she'd put in earbuds and was listening to her mp3 player. She was lip syncing some unknown song. She looked up at me and grinned, pulling one of the buds loose."I couldn't live without my music." She threw a towel at me to fold."Listening to anything good?" She mentioned a band I'd never heard of, and moved the folded stuff from beside her and patted the seat beside her. I sat and she handed me the ear bud."Check it out, you might like it." I put it in my ear and listened for a song or two, folding another towel. A hard rock song started and she turned it up a bit and started singing along. She got to the chorus and really joined in full blast. The lyrics were pretty explicit. I was thinking you wouldn't hear music like that on the radio around here. There was a pause, then a soft intro began. The ballad was soft and low, and Summer stopped and closed her eyes, her lips barely moving with the lyrics. When I noticed I stopped and listened intently to the lyrics, it was about intense, heart-felt, you are my world, kind of love. The kind of love that lasts longer than a lifetime. When it ended she reached down and stopped the playback. She looked straight out the window for a moment and turned to me, a shy sweet smile on her lips."Do you believe in love Pete?" She asked me. I stared at her in wide-eyed amazement for a minute, and began slowly nodding."I do now." I said, my voice barely above a whisper. I wanted to kiss her so badly, but something in her eyes made me hesitate. There was sadness there, and they welled up as if she were doing her best to hold back tears. A wash of emotion swept over me like a storm driven wave, and I leaned forward lifted her chin and kissed her softly. Our lips brushed, our tongues sought out one another, delicately probing. Something wet touched my cheek making me break the kiss long before I wanted to. I pulled back and a tear streamed down Summer's cheek. I reached for one of the towels and daubed it. I took a deep breath and was about to ask why she was crying when a curt little head shake waved off the question."Please don't ask, not yet anyway." She said, her voice thick with emotion. "I'm sorry." She said wiping the remaining tear with the heel of her hand."You don't have anything to be sorry about." I replied softly.She inhaled deeply and let it out slowly. She turned to me with a smile on her mouth but sadness in her eyes."I saw there's a free concert in the park tonight. Want to go? A rock blues cover band is playing. Sounds like they might be good."I knew they were good, my friends brother was in the band, and I'd heard them before. I smiled and nodded. "Sounds like fun, and they are good, I've heard them before.""I should ride down and get the Jeep. There's no way you're walking that far." I said sternly."Yes dear." Summer rolled her eyes at me. She giggled, and got up hobbling off to the bedroom and came back with a set of keys handing them to me."It's black, and I'm guessing the only one with West Virginia plates. It's at the walk-in clinic on Route 12."I nodded. "I know exactly where you mean. I'll go get it. You relax, take a nap if you want. I should be back in an hour or so." I smiled. I kissed her again, the underlying want in our embrace was nearly too much. She placed her hand on my chest, with the barest hint of pressure. She was right, if I kept it up we weren't going anywhere. I reluctantly stepped back, picked up the folded towels and put them away. I walked back out and she had laid down on the couch with her foot up on a pillow. I smiled that she'd taken my suggestion."Can I get you anything before I go?" I said softly leaning over the arm of the couch. She just smiled and gave her head a little shake. She reached up pulling me down closer for a quick upside-down kiss. I headed for the kitchen door, pausing as I closed it quietly, looking back into the house. I turned and started walking home.I walked, lost in thought. This week had been a week of firsts for me. I grinned at the thought of the first day when I lost my virginity to an amazing woman. The aggravation of the following days of not knowing exactly what was happening. If I had just opened my eyes I would have noticed she was waiting for me. Then today when she all but pushed me into making love to her again. I wondered why, well why me anyway. I knew so little about her. What was going on here. We'd known each other about a week, what was that question about believing in love. I could easily fall in love with her, I had to admit. Was I doing just that? So many questions came to mind as I walked up my driveway, I grabbed my bike out of the garage and hopped on. I made my way down to the coast road and started pedaling in earnest up the first rise. The traffic drifted past me as I sought answers to my questions. I pedaled harder nearly coasting up the next rise. Why was I over analyzing this? I was living out a fantasy any red-blooded male would die for. A beautiful, sexy woman wanted to have sex with me, repeatedly. Isn't that enough for me? I laughed out loud at that thought because I realized, it isn't.I rolled down the long slope of the hill seeing the clinic up ahead. I pulled into the parking lot and rode around looking for the Jeep and found it near the side of the building. I checked the plate and got off my bike, took out the keys and opened up the driver's side door. The heat billowed out of it from being parked in the sun so long. The smell of a roasted sweet smelling air freshener poured out and nearly gagged me. I walked to the back and looked at how I was going to get my bike in there and noticed there was a folding bike rack on the spare tire mount. I figured it out in a few minutes an

We're serving up some hard-won advice about winning elections - and it's not pretty. While our Never Trump allies and high-paid consultants keep screaming the same tired strategies at Democratic politicians, we're here with a bolder approach inspired by David Bowie's wisdom about language and a certain scene from "Better Call Saul."We dive deep into what undecided and independent voters actually want (spoiler: it's not what you think), examine the post-election interviews that reveal the uncomfortable truth about swing voters, and explore why policy substance keeps losing to vibes, farts, and other distractions.In local news, we have some upsetting tornado recovery updates from St. Louis, where FEMA showed up five days after the storm, and it was not to provide immediate help. Stay in Touch! Email: proleftpodcast@gmail.comWebsite: proleftpod.comSupport via Patreon: patreon.com/proleftpodMail: The Professional Left, PO Box 9133, Springfield, Illinois, 62791Not safe for work. Recorded live from the Cornfield Resistance.Support the show

Today's Sports Daily covers an unbelievable night in the NBA with two more road teams winning Game 1's (now 3 in a row), a staple is coming back to the NBA next year, Justin Tucker gets released (do with that what you will), and an NHL playoff note about the Avalanche. Music written by Bill Conti & Allee Willis (Casablanca Records/Universal Music Group) 

Episode 19. Chaz has an epiphany and assembles the Regarding...Panel one more time to clear the air and make things right with the lead singer of the third iteration of Van Halen, Mr. Gary Cherone. Join Scotzo, Wolfie, Kevin Brown, and Josh Michael as they hear Chaz' case and weigh in with their own observations, opinions, and critique. Not your usual show, and one you don't want to miss - despite the lack of Kendall Mints coverage. And hey...one more shameless plug for our excellent new site: ⁠regardingvh3.com⁠.Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

There's a reason they call it...ahem...like rabbits. Hour 3 5/1/2025 full 2231 Thu, 01 May 2025 21:00:00 +0000 zRB4qdwsG6nSPdiJJ3BEf25HD9Tfc48M news The Dana & Parks Podcast news There's a reason they call it...ahem...like rabbits. Hour 3 5/1/2025 You wanted it... Now here it is! Listen to each hour of the Dana & Parks Show whenever and wherever you want! 2024 © 2021 Audacy, Inc. News False https://player.amperwave

Hello, our stainless-steel saucepans and welcome to ep 122 of BGC. We hope you had a lovely Easter break, if that is something you do. A big shout-out to Jan's father, as he is in hospital having broken his hip trying to realign the TV satellite dish on the International Space Station. Our advice - just go with cable! Our guest this week is the wonderful Debra Erickson, all the way from Portland, Oregon. Debra might be better known to you from her InstaSpace handle 'The Blind Kitchen'. A fantastic cook, Debra is here to teach Óran a thing or two about making toast, boiling water, skinning a cat, and the proper way to cook lamb's balls. Ahem! Sorry meatballs. (Not a moment too soon, says Clodagh!) So, strip down to your cardinal vestments, stop waiting in line to take a selfie with Pope Francis, and get ready to listen to the number 1 podcast as listened to by Swiss Guards - Blind Guys Chat! 10 out of 15 potential future Popes prefer it to being a potential future Pope! Links for this show: · https://theblindkitchen.com/ · https://www.facebook.com/theblindkitchen/ · https://www.instagram.com/theblindkitchen1/ Support Blind Guys Chat by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/blind-guys-chatRead transcript

*sneezes* W-WEGMANS! Gazuntite. I'm not gonna lie, if I lived closer to this place I'd be there all the time. Whole Foods Trader Joe's Wegmans. Honestly? Ranked? Trader Joe's Wegmans Wegmans. lol. Whole Foods is a necessary evil. {Enter The Multiverse} No, I want the half Can't go all the way Enough is enough And a hand is a hand And a handout is ransom, Spare me the note Spare me the selfish suicide concepts Spare me the alter The coaxial The collar The caller— Whatever you call me Spare me the mantras Stop talking. Long throat violence, Oh, I onkybhope to know you (Or I don't) I only hope to notice m Oh long Johnson Quick sermons and a few soft passwords A couple ardvsrks on a long top showman A couple bad barks from the dog And work for the foreman Who are you after (Not god) Have been forgiven? Is fhat a question. I marked it as such And still j walked up The lock in the bathtub did honors Did honors Did run today Who are you for Not the office Not the John Not the forerunner Oe the forward Who are you, god talker? Who are you Was often the question asked And you want to do all you want Home alone The devil runs From behind her nothing soft Anymore Awkward And then unearthed I saw you were watched, stalking Also Pulled back on my reigns, the horse Does bit the bite down And then some soaked offer Was Half you are, where Wear the volume down Wear your art hard Or suffer, Gaga! GAGA WHERE ARE YOU? LADY GAGA I'M ON A HORSE target GAGA! LADY GAGA I'M ON A HORSE, I SAID. BUT WHERE?! NEAR ENOUGH THET YOU CAN HEAR ME, LIKE, OBVIOUSLY, BUT FAR ENOUGH AWAY THAT YOU CAN'T SEE ME ON A HORSE. ARE YOU COMING?! NEGATIVE. WELL— WHY NOT?! THE HORSE WONT MOVE! JUMP OFF THEN. IMPOSSIBLE. WHY IS JUMPING OFF A HORSE IMPOSSIBLE WHEN YOURE LADY GAGA ITS BECAUSE I'M LADY GAGA THAT THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR MULTIPLE REASONS WHAT— JUMP OFF OF THE— NEGATIVE. THERE ARE MULTIPLE FACTORS CONTRIBUTING TO THIS IMPOSSIBILITY. WHY ARE THEY YELLING. Omg shut up 2 bit horse jumper Target Target Stalker Stalker Obi wan kanobi! Sheeeeeeer forces! What is this? Bad cheerleaders. WHY ARE WE YELLING?! Oh. We're fighting. Oh, that makes sense, What kind of fighting. Sword— unh— FIGHTING. Oh, okay. Why is lady Gaga on a horse?! Cause she's just like that sometimes. *shrugs, but on a horse— obviously dressed elaborately enough that yes, jumping off of the horse would be practically LADY GAGA No, completely. —Completely impossible. I wanna watch you eat spicy hot wings. In a sweater. But I left handed magic to Can't- that Cancelled I hope it was cashmere Or Calvin Klein I'll retract, Meditate and then Redact that Maybe Fantasize Glamourize that for a lifetime Pull the knife out of my back, And then sample it. I wanna watch you eat hotwings. That's—- What I want. GAGA. PLEASE! LADY GAGA I'm sorry— he's not moving. THIS IS URGENT. LADY GAGA I know it's urgent. My lack of yelling does not negate that it isn't, but. BUT WHAT? *yawns* I'm getting sleepy. [LADY GAGA falls asleep atop the horse; only then does the horse begin to move, however— it appears as though GAGA is now completely unconscious. But those shoes. Egad. Bro. lol. Why is this? I'm… my writers blocks are not fun, practical, or progressive. They're just. [LADY GAGA fights and defeats an entire battle completely unconscious atop a horse.] Isn't technically the horse… fighting. No, and I'll explain to you why. Omgz *spoiler* [lady Gaga IS the horse] Why. What the fuck. Fuck these shapeshifters. Fuck everything right now. What the fuck did I just watch. WHAT DID I JUST SEEEEEEEEEE Dedede…fleetleum, fleetleflum… “Fleedleflum?” Ahem!? Dude, you are a villain. WHAT, BECAUSE I SAID “FLEETLEFLUM” *fleedleflum AHEM! I SETH MEYERS is revealed as the villain… Again. WHAT! WHY! I THOUGHT I WAS THE VILLAIN. you said you didn't want it! THEN I ADJUSTED. Well, too late. WHAT. Nice. Hehe. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! I WENT METHOD. A-for effort, I guess? WHATEVER A-FOR-EFFORT. I JUST COMMITTED A LOT OF EVIL SHIT For what FOR THEATRICAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES. Well. “WELL?” Like what. Like— Tax Fraud. Ahem. Nice. [beat] Seth, you got the part. Yesssss! Booyah. Maybe you can take some method lessons and pointers from your friend here— Salt of the earth! — Mr. Evil tax fraud man. RYAN REYNOLDS *deflates* Later. Where are you going? I'm going to do Pilates. Because I'm rich. (Everyone just kind of nods in agreement.) L E G E N D S STEPHEN COLBERT runs at full speed down the street towards the house at which his formerly youthful self “recently” disappeared during a thunderstorm. Oh look. It's little Stevie! You recognize me?! OF COURSE I DO! You're the big hotshot anchorman on TV, but I remember… I don't have—time— Suddenly, he sees it— the radio tower which apparently transported him into this, a distant future, but also a remarkably odd parallel of reality which seems to have been sprung from his own timeline. Where is this going? We'll see. Apparently, I'm reanimated; Certain parts just don't work, I'm factory reset And radiated Aggrandized to carry out this task And then cease to be A zombie, if you will A corpse responding to light energy inside of me So when I leave, I'm not sleeping I'm decomposing Deteriorating I stay hydrated to keep my eyes involved In the light almost as if The illusion is existence— However, I know better It's simply a simulation I mutated against my better judgement Just for this focus Aspirations as if Aggressions could be achiviments At any rate A talking head Who are you? Done for now. Who are you! Done for now. Who are you? A far cry Dust in the wind, And I'm sure so for aure That the places I've been Are more often television location sequences Than not. Aha, who are you? The plot. Then who are I? A handsome damsel. Hark. But not to wake, I form again To dream of you And then Cease to be, My honor, So that may I call To wish a gasp upon a cantered breath, I scream to wake And then you, a glisten, Never to count time I waking, Them as sheep, And she who calls I— There, the canter, And there I wake to know I, Call I, My bare and lay truth So that There waking, calls I now The scream of shadow Mercy, yonder But not waiting, I cherish To bark. …. …. Wt— Now I could see how my energy was moving; I had to write as much as I could before my media update. Intentional brainwash. Suddenly, it all made me so nervous. Programming. Then again, It didn't matter, really, in the end. 6 hours. There was nothing more daunting Than the approaching courier for Whole Foods market And Instacart simultaneously because it meant Somehow, That I had an album coming out. Eagle eye, And to say the brown soul May go extinct Eagle eye Give me a bite of your Adam's Apple I want to taste you I want to know fortune Through the glory of love In the wonder of your arms I want to know nothing but Love in your eyes And in your mind, My heart MAYA RUDOLPH I feel weird. FRED … ARMISEN This is getting intense. That's probably it. AMY POEH—LER No. AMY PH— No. OF COURSE IT IS. ITS SUPPOSED TO BE. why are you yelling? IM NOT YELLING. I'M SPEAKING IN CAPITAL LETTERS. TINA FEY …there's a difference! RACHEL WITH A ‘T'? Maybe DRATCH YEAH there IS. Okay, where are we going with this? Shh. Not yet. I AM PRINCESS SHAMALAMADINGDONG. WHY? It's sketch comedy. Does it HAVE to have motive? You're right— but it at least has to have a plot. Meanwhile… SETH MEYERS'S wand has been stolen. Hey. Yes? There was..a… ??? There was a, like a— like a — ?? There was like, a number two pencil here. …there still is. No, like a very— like, a specific— There's— a bunch of them here. No— Just like always. No, it's. [Blank stares] N—nevermind. Wait— What's up. 1, 2, 3, 4– who am I forgetting? ARSENIO HALL Not yet, Arsenio; We're still on strike force 5! Where's Jimmy Kimmel! Meanwhile, in Jimmy Kimmel's lair. JIMMY KIMMEL (MWAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH) Uh. Wow. Yeah. Okay. For Shits and giggles— Oma goash. Waw. Yah. I knuh. Just waw. Uhh… Idk. The weird SNL sketches all apparently have their own time— AANG APPA, YIP YIP! APPA FUCK OFF— WOAH. OKAY. Yeah, not everything should be live action. Seconded. — lines…. Ahem. Waw. Srsly. However, this live action magic school bus. [SCHOOL BUS CARAPULTING TOWADS FIREY DEMISE WITH NO POSSIBLE RESOLVE IN SIGHT]. *doom* Wild. Why. Yoooooo. The world needed that. Anyway. JIMMY KIMMEL MWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GUILLERMO JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJA JIMMY KIMMEL MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GUELLERMO Wait— —is that his name? Maybe. I might just be racist. Well, it's not Carlos. U MEANWHILE, ALSO, ON WISTERIA LANE GABBI CARLOS! GET BACK HERE! Damn. How are these people still at it? Apparently wer're in TV WORLD. Ahem. It's TV LAND. No, it's {Enter The Multiverse} AHEM. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2025 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū. [REDACTED]

*sneezes* W-WEGMANS! Gazuntite. I'm not gonna lie, if I lived closer to this place I'd be there all the time. Whole Foods Trader Joe's Wegmans. Honestly? Ranked? Trader Joe's Wegmans Wegmans. lol. Whole Foods is a necessary evil. {Enter The Multiverse} No, I want the half Can't go all the way Enough is enough And a hand is a hand And a handout is ransom, Spare me the note Spare me the selfish suicide concepts Spare me the alter The coaxial The collar The caller— Whatever you call me Spare me the mantras Stop talking. Long throat violence, Oh, I onkybhope to know you (Or I don't) I only hope to notice m Oh long Johnson Quick sermons and a few soft passwords A couple ardvsrks on a long top showman A couple bad barks from the dog And work for the foreman Who are you after (Not god) Have been forgiven? Is fhat a question. I marked it as such And still j walked up The lock in the bathtub did honors Did honors Did run today Who are you for Not the office Not the John Not the forerunner Oe the forward Who are you, god talker? Who are you Was often the question asked And you want to do all you want Home alone The devil runs From behind her nothing soft Anymore Awkward And then unearthed I saw you were watched, stalking Also Pulled back on my reigns, the horse Does bit the bite down And then some soaked offer Was Half you are, where Wear the volume down Wear your art hard Or suffer, Gaga! GAGA WHERE ARE YOU? LADY GAGA I'M ON A HORSE target GAGA! LADY GAGA I'M ON A HORSE, I SAID. BUT WHERE?! NEAR ENOUGH THET YOU CAN HEAR ME, LIKE, OBVIOUSLY, BUT FAR ENOUGH AWAY THAT YOU CAN'T SEE ME ON A HORSE. ARE YOU COMING?! NEGATIVE. WELL— WHY NOT?! THE HORSE WONT MOVE! JUMP OFF THEN. IMPOSSIBLE. WHY IS JUMPING OFF A HORSE IMPOSSIBLE WHEN YOURE LADY GAGA ITS BECAUSE I'M LADY GAGA THAT THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR MULTIPLE REASONS WHAT— JUMP OFF OF THE— NEGATIVE. THERE ARE MULTIPLE FACTORS CONTRIBUTING TO THIS IMPOSSIBILITY. WHY ARE THEY YELLING. Omg shut up 2 bit horse jumper Target Target Stalker Stalker Obi wan kanobi! Sheeeeeeer forces! What is this? Bad cheerleaders. WHY ARE WE YELLING?! Oh. We're fighting. Oh, that makes sense, What kind of fighting. Sword— unh— FIGHTING. Oh, okay. Why is lady Gaga on a horse?! Cause she's just like that sometimes. *shrugs, but on a horse— obviously dressed elaborately enough that yes, jumping off of the horse would be practically LADY GAGA No, completely. —Completely impossible. I wanna watch you eat spicy hot wings. In a sweater. But I left handed magic to Can't- that Cancelled I hope it was cashmere Or Calvin Klein I'll retract, Meditate and then Redact that Maybe Fantasize Glamourize that for a lifetime Pull the knife out of my back, And then sample it. I wanna watch you eat hotwings. That's—- What I want. GAGA. PLEASE! LADY GAGA I'm sorry— he's not moving. THIS IS URGENT. LADY GAGA I know it's urgent. My lack of yelling does not negate that it isn't, but. BUT WHAT? *yawns* I'm getting sleepy. [LADY GAGA falls asleep atop the horse; only then does the horse begin to move, however— it appears as though GAGA is now completely unconscious. But those shoes. Egad. Bro. lol. Why is this? I'm… my writers blocks are not fun, practical, or progressive. They're just. [LADY GAGA fights and defeats an entire battle completely unconscious atop a horse.] Isn't technically the horse… fighting. No, and I'll explain to you why. Omgz *spoiler* [lady Gaga IS the horse] Why. What the fuck. Fuck these shapeshifters. Fuck everything right now. What the fuck did I just watch. WHAT DID I JUST SEEEEEEEEEE Dedede…fleetleum, fleetleflum… “Fleedleflum?” Ahem!? Dude, you are a villain. WHAT, BECAUSE I SAID “FLEETLEFLUM” *fleedleflum AHEM! I SETH MEYERS is revealed as the villain… Again. WHAT! WHY! I THOUGHT I WAS THE VILLAIN. you said you didn't want it! THEN I ADJUSTED. Well, too late. WHAT. Nice. Hehe. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! I WENT METHOD. A-for effort, I guess? WHATEVER A-FOR-EFFORT. I JUST COMMITTED A LOT OF EVIL SHIT For what FOR THEATRICAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES. Well. “WELL?” Like what. Like— Tax Fraud. Ahem. Nice. [beat] Seth, you got the part. Yesssss! Booyah. Maybe you can take some method lessons and pointers from your friend here— Salt of the earth! — Mr. Evil tax fraud man. RYAN REYNOLDS *deflates* Later. Where are you going? I'm going to do Pilates. Because I'm rich. (Everyone just kind of nods in agreement.) L E G E N D S STEPHEN COLBERT runs at full speed down the street towards the house at which his formerly youthful self “recently” disappeared during a thunderstorm. Oh look. It's little Stevie! You recognize me?! OF COURSE I DO! You're the big hotshot anchorman on TV, but I remember… I don't have—time— Suddenly, he sees it— the radio tower which apparently transported him into this, a distant future, but also a remarkably odd parallel of reality which seems to have been sprung from his own timeline. Where is this going? We'll see. Apparently, I'm reanimated; Certain parts just don't work, I'm factory reset And radiated Aggrandized to carry out this task And then cease to be A zombie, if you will A corpse responding to light energy inside of me So when I leave, I'm not sleeping I'm decomposing Deteriorating I stay hydrated to keep my eyes involved In the light almost as if The illusion is existence— However, I know better It's simply a simulation I mutated against my better judgement Just for this focus Aspirations as if Aggressions could be achiviments At any rate A talking head Who are you? Done for now. Who are you! Done for now. Who are you? A far cry Dust in the wind, And I'm sure so for aure That the places I've been Are more often television location sequences Than not. Aha, who are you? The plot. Then who are I? A handsome damsel. Hark. But not to wake, I form again To dream of you And then Cease to be, My honor, So that may I call To wish a gasp upon a cantered breath, I scream to wake And then you, a glisten, Never to count time I waking, Them as sheep, And she who calls I— There, the canter, And there I wake to know I, Call I, My bare and lay truth So that There waking, calls I now The scream of shadow Mercy, yonder But not waiting, I cherish To bark. …. …. Wt— Now I could see how my energy was moving; I had to write as much as I could before my media update. Intentional brainwash. Suddenly, it all made me so nervous. Programming. Then again, It didn't matter, really, in the end. 6 hours. There was nothing more daunting Than the approaching courier for Whole Foods market And Instacart simultaneously because it meant Somehow, That I had an album coming out. Eagle eye, And to say the brown soul May go extinct Eagle eye Give me a bite of your Adam's Apple I want to taste you I want to know fortune Through the glory of love In the wonder of your arms I want to know nothing but Love in your eyes And in your mind, My heart MAYA RUDOLPH I feel weird. FRED … ARMISEN This is getting intense. That's probably it. AMY POEH—LER No. AMY PH— No. OF COURSE IT IS. ITS SUPPOSED TO BE. why are you yelling? IM NOT YELLING. I'M SPEAKING IN CAPITAL LETTERS. TINA FEY …there's a difference! RACHEL WITH A ‘T'? Maybe DRATCH YEAH there IS. Okay, where are we going with this? Shh. Not yet. I AM PRINCESS SHAMALAMADINGDONG. WHY? It's sketch comedy. Does it HAVE to have motive? You're right— but it at least has to have a plot. Meanwhile… SETH MEYERS'S wand has been stolen. Hey. Yes? There was..a… ??? There was a, like a— like a — ?? There was like, a number two pencil here. …there still is. No, like a very— like, a specific— There's— a bunch of them here. No— Just like always. No, it's. [Blank stares] N—nevermind. Wait— What's up. 1, 2, 3, 4– who am I forgetting? ARSENIO HALL Not yet, Arsenio; We're still on strike force 5! Where's Jimmy Kimmel! Meanwhile, in Jimmy Kimmel's lair. JIMMY KIMMEL (MWAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH) Uh. Wow. Yeah. Okay. For Shits and giggles— Oma goash. Waw. Yah. I knuh. Just waw. Uhh… Idk. The weird SNL sketches all apparently have their own time— AANG APPA, YIP YIP! APPA FUCK OFF— WOAH. OKAY. Yeah, not everything should be live action. Seconded. — lines…. Ahem. Waw. Srsly. However, this live action magic school bus. [SCHOOL BUS CARAPULTING TOWADS FIREY DEMISE WITH NO POSSIBLE RESOLVE IN SIGHT]. *doom* Wild. Why. Yoooooo. The world needed that. Anyway. JIMMY KIMMEL MWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GUILLERMO JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJA JIMMY KIMMEL MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GUELLERMO Wait— —is that his name? Maybe. I might just be racist. Well, it's not Carlos. U MEANWHILE, ALSO, ON WISTERIA LANE GABBI CARLOS! GET BACK HERE! Damn. How are these people still at it? Apparently wer're in TV WORLD. Ahem. It's TV LAND. No, it's {Enter The Multiverse} AHEM. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2025 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū. [REDACTED]

Both Moose and Dews have a long history with Halestorm, first meeting the band over 13 years ago during a radio station acoustic session, so they are both well-qualified to talk about the band, their evolution in the music industry, and the dynamics of the rock and metal scene.  As the band gear up to release their new album, Moose and Dews look ahead to Halestorm's potential for future success and their impact on fans and the industry.  Also, listen out for Dews studiously failing to mention that he once unsuccessfully tried sliding into Lzzy Hale's DMs. Ahem. Check out our chosen charity Metal For Good and some of the great charity work they do here https://metalforgood.org/  https://primordialradio.com https://www.instagram.com/primordialradio https://tiktok.com/@primordialradio https://www.facebook.com/primordialradio https://www.x.com/primordialradio​

As much as I avoid real life drama with all my might, I've been guilty of falling into some of these White Lotus character traps in business. Yes it's a show about people who are conflicted and struggle through their emotions and relationships (among other many things), but it actually has some solid lessons that can be valuable in the startup/fundraising process. From Belinda desperately holding onto an investor's maybe, to Saxon who wraps his whole identity up in his business. Ahem… sound familiar? There are some moments that hit close to home.  Why is it so dangerous to zero in and “hope” one investor will come through? And how do you avoid that?  In this episode, I share 2 valuable lessons that popped up watching what is arguably one of the best series on MAX. Well, that is, if you like that cringey, luxury, drama, murder, kind of thing. About Your Host Jayla Siciliano, Shark Tank entrepreneur turned real estate investor, excels in building brands, teams, and products. CEO of a bi-coastal luxury short-term rental company, she also hosts the Seed Money Podcast where she's on a mission to help early-stage entrepreneurs turn their ideas into reality!    Connect: Website: https://seedmoneypodcast.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jaylasiciliano/ Subscribe and watch on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@seedmoneypodcast/ Please rate, follow and review the podcast on https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/seed-money/id1740815877 and https://open.spotify.com/show/0VkQECosb1spTFsUhu6uFY?si=5417351fb73a4ea1/! Hearing your comments and questions helps me come up with the best topics for the show! The information in this podcast is educational and general in nature and does not take into consideration the listener's personal circumstances. Therefore, it is not intended to be a substitute for specific, individualized financial, legal, or tax advice.  

Two high level demons have caused a hectic diversion just off camera during SETH MEYERS'S show when literally all hell breaks loose; the ought he has maintained a lifetime of secrecy and compliance without giving way to the slightest upset, his eyes widen as he attempts to finish his sentences, eventually unable to keep it together. SETH MEYERS …Blah, dee—blah, de BlahBlah. DIRECTOR —cut. SETH MEYERS AH. EXCUSE ME. DEMON ONE Ah, shit. DEMON TWO It's almost as if he's actually talking to us. SETH MEYERS WHAT IN THE FUCK IS ACTUALLY, LIKE, GOING ON. DEMON ONE “Like”? DEMON TWO Oh shit, I think he is acknowledging us. DEMON ONE “Like?!” SETH MEYERS WHO ARE YOU. WHAT IS THIS? DEMON TWO OHHHH SHIT. DEMON ONE DUDE, WHATS UP! Seth Meyers has become somewhat of a celebrity even amongst the higher, but especially the lower realms for his exceptionally high tolerance for metaphorical and supernatural phenomena; He has mostly considered the ability to be able to see these things as some sort of latent health condition or hallucinations of some sort which from a very young age he had chosen to not only keep to himself, but— VERY YOUNG SETH MEYERS [ridiculously atrocious otherworldly shenanigans] (Does not react) Woah. (Walks away unaffected entirely) Straaaange. Is this a human child? Apparently. ‍♂️ —never react at all. *also it should be noted that the two demons are the same demons from the flashback however aged into much more vicious, monstrously scary (yet still somehow humanoid) demon people. Thank you Google for correcting that. GOOGLE Correcting what. Nothing. So it's safe to say that in his early acting days, teaching himself to “react to act” came as somewhat of a challenge. INT. IMPROV CLASS. DAY VO, Narrator reacting to normal human situations was obviously not entirely, by this point, second nature to young Seth, SETH MEYERS Wait, pause. Uh, no, Seth Meyers. Why am I in this? I didn't agree to this. oh no. You didn't agree to any of this. I just said that. Oh. Unpause. No wait. No, not unpause: Unpause— or we skip straight back to the part with you trapped inside a metal box with almost no holes in it. Wait— what metal box. Shh. No spoilers. CUT IMMEDIATELY TO: Without being able to guess that it is their dear friend and colleague SETH MEYERS in the box, the HOSTSunanimously vote to abandon the challenge and leave SETH MEYERS in a metal box to go get lunch. HEY. Oh wait— sorry— did you want lunch? YES I WANT LUNCH. We should order him something. JIMMY KIMMEL I'll make you a tuna sandwich! SETH MEYERS I DONT WANT A TUNA SANDWICH. Woah, that typo was Almost wild… GOOGLE What typo! MEANWHILE, in a fabricated flashback to the early 2000's The LEGACY CAST of GOLDEN ERA SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE wakes up on a Sunday morning after a wild party— Oh, shit, what time is it! —I'm AbLIND. In a “Tina Sandwich” OH [CENSOR BEEP] ITS SUNDAY. — MY EYES. WHAT THE [OOOOOOOOOO] HAPPENED LAST NIGHT. this never happened. Flashback, to The night before: [actually, because this is the time travel part] Two nights previously, on FRIDAY— (Drunkenly) WHAT SHOULD WE DO NOW! —THERE'S STILL SO MUCH TIME BEFORE WORK! —SO MUCH TIIIIIIME! (And apparently, maybe even psychedelics, but SHH, cause it's NBC) ahem, PEACOCK. Bless you. No, its Peacock, this show is on peacock. Gazuntite. *facepalm* None the wiser, None the wiser All the eyes And all the fires Are mine, And none the wiser None the wiser All the time is light now And All the wiser All the wiser All the water fountains fly And none the wiser None the wiser— SUPA[REDACTED], a GOD, REMOVES all of her favorite artifacts from NEW YORK CITY before stroking (Leave that typo, google's three for three now) –the earth in the oncoming apocalypse, last and not least, Rockefeller Plaza. The building is violently catapulted into the heavens with everyone in it. WHAT JUST HAPPENED. You're welcome. What happened to the rock? I moved it. What happened to New York?! It's over now. What's over now! The whole thing. The planet. It's— Its all gone. Wow. That seems pretty catastrophic. It was horrific. Wait— if you moved the building with all of us in it, wouldn't we all have been pretty badly injured. Oh, you all died, like immediately. *collective gasps* Instantly. —like, as soon as I did that, but, it's fine, You're all dead now. *phew* What. I MURDERED YOU ALL AND BROUGHT YOU TO HEAVEN WITH ME; What are you DEAF. AHEM, excuse me there's still some New York leftovers I guess, somewhere in my make up Besides you know the rock and all these l fountains and statues and everything…and paintings and other cool buildings. Slightly less cool— but still cool. But what about everything— What about everything and everyone else? Everyone else also died, and I only brought back the cool stuff, And the cool people— But everything else is just pretty much—- So it's all over?! Yes. This is the end. Of that last thing. Wow. Anyway, enjoy your…whatever. I'm gonna go to Disneyland, which for the record, Is across the street. What. You're welcome. Betore: Hey man, you want to ride an elephant? What? Do you want to ride an elephant? Sure! Here— I bought your wife a saddle! The television people despise fat chicks. Or— used to— Before they realized diversity was necessary for demographics, forced representation. Now they tolerate them— And even glorify the significantly morbidly obese In exchange for advertising dollars, realizing that the people they're marketing to Are more likely morbidly obese than not. Oh, How times have changed. [The Festival Project ™] Will Ferrell is hysterically crying in the break room (during his SNL era— nevermind he is his current-day aged–he has just seen everything backwards and forwards through the infinite and everlasting cascades of time. It's been an emotional few days for Will; his friends and castmates are worried about him. Hey Will. Hey buddy. Are you… gonna be alright. He sobs.He runs away and into another room—(assumingly craft service)s, the allure of the croissants and muffin seem to temporarily soothe him, however, as he begins to relax mid-sob, a mysterious figure appears at the table. Don't worry. I'm right here! The figure eats a cupcake instead of muffins or the croissants. Will screams hysterically and cries even harder. No one seems to hear him or be around at all. (Eating a cupcake) It's okay! WILL (inconsolably, in complete hysterics) AaaaaHHHHHHHHHH. Shh, clam down . After a bout of extreme hysterics, and the figure pretty much just calmly watching his breakdown unaffected and continuing to eat the cupcake happily, Will realizes that he and this figure are the only one around—at all. This means the cascades through space and time are still not over. WILL (Still sobbing.) Relax. WILL …heh… there are cupcakes? Huh? Uh, no— I brought this myself. WILL From WHERE?! You know where. [beat] WILL …are there more. Ah? Oh yeah— WILL Can I—? No, Not here! Then why'd you—?! WILL I just told you, I brought this! (he begins crying again but softly.) The figure is still for the most part unaffected but seemingly amused by Will's upset, presumes eating another, more delicious looking cupcake, which appearing from out of nowhere— (unseen from the audience, even by Will) which baffles him into immediately stopping crying, something like a bemused toddler, as his eyes widen and his mouth falls agape in offense. WILL IS THAT ANOTHER CUPCAKE? Well, you saw me eat the first one. WILL YOU SAID THERE WERE NO MORE! I said there were no more here! Do you see any cupcakes here?! Besides this?! WILL (Becoming irate, red faced) WELL WHAT THE FUCK IS THE DIFFERENCE?! The difference is your access to them. Damn! WILL Well let me have some of— (Eats last bite, mouth full) It's all gone. WILL (Eyes widening, then squinting in bewilderment and confusion) Do you want a muffin or croissant, though? WILL (Realizing he has no other options—) Kind of…maybe— A bagel? WILL Mmno, maybe a muffin…croissant. (He is increasingly distant and Bewildered (read: shattered) but also coming to; he moves toward the table Skream , your love/ massive, Drake Lil bitz Anybody else feel like Kendrick helped Drake get his next few girls? Like, she's probably in the 8th grade right now like “I'm his type, ya'll” and she's gonna keep that goal in mind until it becomes a reality. I think that's just how being a rockstar works sometimes. You write a hit right now, depending on how famous you are or will get, your next wife is in kindergarten while your first wife is probably at prom— and the third one is maybe even in Utero! Maybe even at the same prom as your first wife. Hey now. Crazy worlds, man. The superstar lifestyle. Anyway, wasn't I writing something less devastating? Not exactly less devastating, it is Will Ferrell crying hysterically. I think he's calmed down now. Yeah. Let's get back to that. It's almost the end of the scene. But then what happens after that? Probably nothing. I can't afford Will Ferrel for more than 5 minutes. You can't afford Will Ferrel at all! Well, his ad says the first five minutes are free. What ad?! CUT TO: Young Will Ferrel before SNL. Oh, Jesus Christ. [Business card appears to have his name misspelled horribly, but obviously he cannot afford to have them reprinted. “First five minutes free” Oh, great. You got that part right! Thank you, come again. I will not come again! We're not always superstars. {Enter The Multiverse} CUT BACK TO Blueberry— chocolate chip? WILL Um, half of each, I guess? What? WILL Well— Get it yourself then, you primadonna. He looks for a plate and plastic knife; as he does so, a third, even more delicious looking incredible cupcake has appeared again out of nowhere, to which the mysterious figure begins enjoying by the heap, mumbling with a mouth of frosting You're such a diva! *mimicking* one half “of each”… mehmehmeh… This is the most delicious cupcake anyone's ever seen— his eyes widen with a tired grief, but before becoming over upset again or irate, he takes a deep breath. And just sighs, as if to say “I hate you.” But they seem to know each other quite well. In fact, this is clearly one of those super-fucked terrifying guardian angel type dynamics where it's obvious that the guardian angel type mystery figure is very tormenting. But in a loving way. …. [beat] [beat] Haven't you wondered why you're like 58 but the rest of your cast mates are in their 20's? WILL [beat] I've always looked like this. …no, you haven't. (The muffin seems to have done its job in calming him down) WILL Trust me, I have. Flashback: a young Will Ferrell looks in the mirror— the mirror shows a present day Will Ferrell, although the teenaged Will Ferrel is obviously quite young. An exact reflection besides the age difference— Will seems neither unaffected nor worried. It's as if in the mirror, he's always seen his present day self. He sighs. End flashback. Present day, (or whenever, actually) Will Ferrell sighs to match the flashback) …maybe that's why you're special. WILL Yeah, maybe that's it. The figure finishes the cupcake and though the muffin halves have rebalanced Will's mood to almost, kind of normal, he still seems disgruntled that it wasn't cupcakes—as the figure finishes the third, most interestingly delicious looking cupcake of all of them. L E G E N D S I've got a whole poem who lives in the squat rack; I've got a dollar for ever caller who talks back, I've got a collar for every occasion I clock into It's a riddle but it's not a rhythm until I give it to em Don't wonder who I am I am space and time, And granted with the right hands, We're gonna have the right dance at the right place At the right time and so Whenever that is— see you then, Until then, I'm not holding any farts in, You feel me? I eat a lot of lentils. I write a lot of great walk on parts for artists I parted the red seas, once, I was also God, watching quite impressed with it And wondered why they called it ‘the read sea' Or the dead ‘the dead sea' As I can't see the bloodshed In the heavens, And so I give respect to the seconds I look away Which might have been a century or eleven, to them. Ah, more men and mathematics. More television friends and heavy dinners More sinners and misfits, and glitched simulations— More missed emissions, More christenings and scrimmages Remember to eat your breakfast Or it's death at a likely curfew remember to split the difference remember, we'll finish as friends As recommended by comrades I have lessons, I also have students in classes, Professors and options And doctors And mantras Barrages of cars And I can't stop talking Cause I gotta get my laundry fixed Fuck it Tina Fey hada booking.com commercial or something– Then, apparently, or maybe I really and readily finally had lost it– JImmy Fallon had a state farm commercial Like a good neighbor – Nope, i wasn't losing my mind. I promised myself i'd stop writing about the girl next door –she seemed evil–but she was acting strangely enough by doing something like brushing her teeth and reading my work from my phone that made the light switch– I didn't care what she could or couldn't do with my phone–I wasn't hiding anything. But now… It had to have all been planned. She seemed evil as fuck despite my trying to trust her… The Server…The Server… Suddenly the kitchen light switched on and it only ever flickered when I was in the middle of something important. Like the world was melting or my dimensions were shifting into parallels or something, or like I was being warned by some overseer with a remote control, but it wasn't all in my head… The plant that brought the plant My inner voice was never wrong–the problem was, however that any time my inner voice was saying anything at all about tHiSmOtHerFuCkeR– When did I acquire immediate voice recognition? So that was his voice… So who, then is the real Jimmy Fallon? There is no real JImmy Fallon. I made him up. You what. I haven't done anything to deserve this. Premonitions. Are you telling me we're dealing with another clairvoyant? On so many levels. –but none of them personal, I hope. There are oh so many… Oh. its you again. –Personal levels. You're in danger here. In New York, or just in general? On Earth. You keep telling me that. I have no reason not to trust you besides the obvious fact. You're oblivious to it! I'm not! I'm just ignoring you. Did you think about what I said? Erring on the side of obsession, no, i've dismissed almost everything you've ever told me. That's off topic. Or not. They want drama! Then they're going to have to fight for it. They're gonna start a war here. So then, I'm just another body, aren't I? Aren't I? Don't jump. Oh, if it isn't Peter Preferences. References and Letters of Recommendation Cancer in remission and admitting i'll probably never see my son again Suicide This is suicide This is suiccide This is suicide. INT. HALLMARK STORE. DAY. Welcome to Hallmark. …thanks. Can I help you find anything? No, I… After stumbling upon a Hallmark store, where the burned thank you cards from his desk are mysteriously recovered, as is, and uncharred, a hidden relic from the desk reemerges, and opens a portal to another world. I was in a very dark world when I met Patrick Kirkpatrick, but the point of the matter was, he was nobody now and maybe even nobody ever. Maybe even, nobody at all. Somebody's gonna come for you. …is this one of those things I keep to myself, or am I writing this down? What's with this? Under the surface, but by admission,I didn't know what it meant, besides the fact that Pretty white boys who were always too good for me always wore them as statement pieces or something, And you know what they say… If you can't beat ‘em. …join em. {Enter The Multiverse} I know the sound of your voice At the drop of a hat like a peck on the cheek And it still don't sound right I still don't think straight I still don't look right But somewhere in these ions, you'll find me at sunset. In a whisper, the taste of your breath Is a sound in my heart and the bloody murder In each heart murmur is getting harder fear father God, Just turn it off Just to make it sotp The man in the box –and it just God awkward. I should pluck your feathers It keeps getting harder each time your skull Hits the auburn surface of the asphalt Every summer at the hard rock Huh? But you just kept drinking And you just worked harder And after all, You're the man in the box What could all go wrong here? It's getting shorter the tears drop faster I'm getting weirder I'm a deadbeat dad And my kid's the bartard I just got a ball pit I'm a Hallmark card, but refused to sign it A dine and dash From the supper club And it's so refined I just lost my mind Cause it's just not time yet. I must have known you once before or something But any fan would say that But how am I a fan When I hated you And I hated your laugh And I hated your band –and you're not that handsome So how is this happening at all? Oh look, something random. Tell me why I'm so horrible Mr miserable mr terrible Mr opulent Mr miser mr wedding band Mr Never Happened Tell me why I'm so bad at this Mr. Wonderful Mr.Awful Mr. half at best Mr. getting faster and faster And faster and faster And faster Till it all washed up on the surface And you wash your hands of it… But the taste in your mouth is still metallic from the contrast Breaking contracts, oh, now you're fast at once and a hard match And a tough act to swallow But i'd rather die tomorrow Than stare at your casket. Now how about that shit! You're right, I lost my mind– but I want you to have it. L E G E N D S JIMMY KIMMEL [an escalating crescendo] AssaaaaagggggggggGggggghhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!! Lol is he all thugged out yet. No not yet. (just wait) I wanna run through marina del ray I want a house in the Palisades But I Knew that 5 years ago (I knew that five years ago ) I want a shack out in Malibu Just to surf the ocean blū But I Knew that five years ago I knew that five years ago Before it all burned I hope we all learned our lessons Surf God has a sense of humor But I was the butt of the joke I want a Condo in Santa Monica Invite my friends over for Barbie volleyball Throw my whole world in the fire pit But I knew that five years ago I knew that five years ago When you realize The world is your instrument But it still hasn't earned you a cent You're still in the hole Earning back what you spent By the microincrements The city people are you as excrement But you just laugh and you sample them Play them like instruments back Perhaps flattery begs them to listen Suddenly you're visible Museum world— Exhibitions Entertainers Comedians Mice and men Interesting remix Should I even be in this language Or should I make it more intimate With melodies? I hit play on a classic And my peloton becomes the office I'm suddenly at work, God Petulance for relevance spanning generations Thank you! Still it takes enough to get it in to you As out of you Can't help t but agree to that Eyeliner! I like it thick around the freckles faces And light ashy eyelashes Over moonlike eyes You know I like it Long hair! Headliner! Why am I inside you? Better yet— Why have I died? Eyeliner, headliner I like it thick around moonlight eyes I like it Old timer, headliner— I like it thick around eyes like Zion Eyeliner, I like it Ashes You're the worst; There are circle k's and 7/11s How was my run on Broadway? Who's the pope now? I hope you choke now There are subway central's And sauces and really hard bosses to fight But I don't want to I'm in south central And I'm still with you From always to oblivion I've been moving for at least an hour But I have no power here Drop a house on me In the hills, if you will And if the winds change, There's still New York What a page turner I live at Rockefeller Plaza There's an apartment above my office There's a notebook For every love I've ever known In the oak There's a something caliber gun in my slumber I clutch with the crutches I took from the hospitals Can't hop the turnsltyle now Can't hop the turnstyle now Hahaha Who art thou, Art monster Who are you now that I care too much to notice The problem was The doves only flew up or a moment before landing on my shoulder That was awkward They were supposed to fly away TV HOST HEY!!!! HEY!!!! HEYYYYYYYY! But which host is it? All of them. All of us are running for our lives All of us are running after Carson, and Paar All of us are stars, But on polaroids not often captured Gone and then away into disaster That's the effect of the Cannon Canon cameras? James Canon?! Laugh harder ‘cause you have to! Laugh stronger cause the studio is frozen, And you want to go home now! It wasn't as fun as you thought And the set is much smaller in real life Now clap and hold for applause Big smiles Big smiles Extra points if you run miles before you show up- Now that's a shiny after thought; Not your average robot Or prototypical tourist! No! A nonconformist and Kimmel can't sing for shit, So he can just hum this verse. (Sorry, I peaked— No homo) Now, I dissect Holiday, I was sure I inspired the Broadway show But who doesn't inspire a rock opera I conspire to conspire, umpire, emperor I studies Agamemnon I wasn't really sure but the frog in my throat said Go on, go on— So I just cried and stuck in my stomach harder I don't want a SETH MEYERS I don't want a tuna sandwich! Just–take the tuna sandwich. Yeah, buddy! SETH I DON'T WANT A TUNA SANDWHICH DO I LOOK LIKE EAT TUNA TO YOU? Um. JIMMY 1 Woah, I sense hostility We can't see you— CRAIG FERGUSON And we don't know who you are, anyway. COLBERT Apparently “someone we know” JIM 1 Tsh. JIM 2 Psh. SETH ITS HOT IN THIS BOX. Ooh, hotbox. That sounds like a plan. Dispensary delivery? The move. SETH YO, Dissection numero dos; I think I know how to make those sounds I think I have that reverb I need herb Or probably a new location With no probes It's only temporary The peloton office But I want a home Me and my family aren't from here Oh, look, more purple — we just show up to rock And then go somewhere farther MEANWHILE… Forgive me father for I have— No. What? No. No. What— why? Just— no. Not you. Not today. But—I have sinned! Of course you have! But father— No. What—? Keep it to yourself. But. Excuse me. {Enter The Multiverse) —- What super hero are you supposed to be? “Malox Max”?! Hehehehe! THE COSMIC AVENGER No! Hehehehehehe! THE COSMIC AVENGER I'm— I'm “The Cosmic Avenger”! What are you avenging?! Montezuma's Revenge?! THE COSMIC AVENGER No— unjust—unjustice—ness. [hysterical laughter ensues] Somewhere in this world lies our story Still true, I'm unsure what it is— But the thing is, I'm sure this the one Of the fables I'm sure this the one of the songs Of the psalms Of the storied palms This is the one of the cards This sir KIMMEL! KIMMEL! KIMMEL! I'm sorry. I don't know who you are. ITS ME. JIMMY. I'm Jimmy. I KNOW YOU'RE— You're not Jimmy, I'm JIMMY. WHAT THE SNARF! What's that? I can't hear you. The tarot said to go against the grain; I was told not to write this tale, but here I am And suddenly the King has a tail, Compliments of T-Mobile, But as did the first one, The first King, of Dogblood Of first strikes And first tears And first scars, Was no king, But everything has meaning The cherishire has eyed me The spider has bitten And then, Envisionment minted I should switch to mint mobile, but knowing There's no real difference— Their all old t-mobile tower; But service with a Billionaire smile Of Blake Lively and False Idols. I don't care, I guess My mind has eyes like sun But my heart has darkness The absolutely most beautiful sunsets have Wonders on drums And numbers to call The best of cocaine on the sidewalk Was sidetracked The best of New York was Los Angeles, And vice versa I hope you took protocol into order I hope you too profound effect and affinity In profanity There's no more Infinite Fallon It Found a call To programming Wall to wall To wall of shame On Walmart Better activate that trial Before it's all gone 13 days and counting And A million ways to die in the west. SETH MCFARLENE look at me. Ah, what the fuck dog. SETH MCFARLENE Oh, so you can hear me! You fuckin schizo! I'm not a schizo I'm in the Illuminati. SETH MCFARLINE The what? The what? SETH MCFARLENE what's the password. this isn't happening right now. SETH MCFARLENE That is correct. See you on the other side, you batshit crazy SonOfABitch. What. *poof* I told you I could make you say my name. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2018-2025 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.™

Seth has three weeks to save his sister.  Just hack into the government and voila. All saved. No biggie.  Ahem.  Listen in and see what his sister's fate is if Seth fails! note: links may be affiliate links that provide me with a small commission at no extra expense to you. In a world with cameras everywhere, Jeremiah Friedli takes it to new levels in this sci-fi... well, he doesn't call it a thriller, but it sure feels like it might be one to me. If you liked Amanda G. Stevens' Haven Seekers series, I think this will be right up your alley.     Core Deception by Jeremiah Friedli  In a world where the government's CORE systems see and track everyone, seventeen-year-old hacker Seth Alvarez is determined to save his sister from being placed in a reeducation facility. Armed with a cryptic letter, Seth embarks on a search for the valuable incognito devices—cyber master keys that can set his sister free. But with only three weeks remaining, he finds himself wedged between two powerful forces who will stop at nothing to get the devices first. Learn more about Jeremiah on his WEBSITE and follow him on GoodReads. Like to listen on the go? You can find Because Fiction Podcast at: Apple Castbox Google Play Libsyn RSS Spotify Amazon and more!

You know, dips in a road can be fun, especially when you may be going maybe a little bit faster [AHEM] than the speed limit. But dips in marriage? They aren't fun, and you will have them. You can become more intentional in just 30 days! Sign up for Dr. Randy’s INTENTIONAL ONE THING CHALLENGE. […]

Episode 18. Our EPIC season wrap with a star studded panel to review the whole album - one more time. You guessed it, we're doing the necessary, listening so you don't have to, asking "How Many Say Why" one last time, and leading the the debut of or excellent new site: regardingvh3.com.Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

On today's Top News in 10, we cover: President Kamala Harris addresses the nation as we reach Day 37 of China's blockade of the Panama Canal. More Oklahoma counties secede from the Union to join the Independent Republic of Texas. The new transwomen LA Lakers obliterate the Chicago Sky, 319 to 4. Ahem... Actually... The most crucial election of the year happens today in the State of Wisconsin. New polling data sheds light on how Americans view the Tesla domestic terror incidents and the Trump administration so far. Rep. Crockett (D-Dallas) leads the week with some disturbing statements. Keep Up With The Daily Signal Sign up for our email newsletters: https://www.dailysignal.com/email     Subscribe to our other shows:  The Tony Kinnett Cast: https://www.dailysignal.com/the-tony-kinnett-cast  Problematic Women: https://www.dailysignal.com/problematic-women  The Signal Sitdown: https://www.dailysignal.com/the-signal-sitdown    Follow The Daily Signal:  X: https://x.com/DailySignal  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thedailysignal/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheDailySignalNews/  Truth Social: https://truthsocial.com/@DailySignal  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/DailySignal  Rumble: https://rumble.com/c/TheDailySignal    Thanks for making The Daily Signal Podcast your trusted source for the day's top news. Subscribe on your favorite podcast platform and never miss an episode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today's Top News in 10, we cover: President Kamala Harris addresses the nation as we reach Day 37 of China’s blockade of the Panama Canal. More Oklahoma counties secede from the Union to join the Independent Republic of Texas. The new transwomen LA Lakers obliterate the Chicago Sky, 319 to 4.   Ahem… Actually… […]

Senator Max Burns grew up attending segregated schools, but deems himself something of an expert on the necessity of deiversity, equity and inclusion in public schools and colleges in the state of Georgia. The fact that he can't even enunciate the word "ethnicity" should already be a 'red flag,' but here we are.Thursday, while struggling to say "ethnicity" correctly (never did), he promoted his unfounded belief that D.E.I. is some form of discrimination versus a means to ending it. The Senate Committee on Education and Youth hearing on Thursday devolved into an argument about what "anti-racism" meant, shortly after Senator Shaun Kemp opined "it seems that if civil rights laws were to be put before this body today we'd be voting against them."You can watch the entire hearing HERE. ------Then, how about Elon Musk going on Fox News with Bret Baier insisting The Trump administration will "go after" propagandists spouting what he calls :"Tesla lies." The lead propagandist who owns hiw own social media platform is telling us the President of the United States who also own his own social media platform - on Fox News, no less - that propaganda suddenly isn't protected free speech. "The ones providing the money, the ones pushing the lies and propaganda, we're going after them."Just like he and Donald believe should happen with those who riled up the January 6th tourists, right? Ahem.

In this *very special* episode of an Old Timey Podcast, we got DP'd. Ahem. By that, we mean that Kristin's dad (aka DP) took over. He renamed the podcast. He accused Norm of having a dirty mind. Worst of all, he tricked us. (On our own podcast! In our own home! Is nothing sacred??) Remember, kids, history hoes always cite their sources! For this episode, DP pulled from: “Small Town, Big Con” episode of 20/20 “A look back at the Natalie Cochran trial,” by Autumn Shelton for REAL WV “Prosecutors say text messages show Natalie Cochran tried to put some distance between Michael Cochran and his family,” by Jessica Jarrish for WVNS TV “Natalie Cochran convicted of murder after Ponzi scheme," by Isabel Modano for lawyer-monthly.com Are you enjoying An Old Timey Podcast? Then please leave us a 5-star rating and review wherever you listen to podcasts! Are you *really* enjoying An Old Timey Podcast? Well, calm down, history ho! You can get more of us on Patreon at patreon.com/oldtimeypodcast. At the $5 level, you'll get a monthly bonus episode (with video!), access to our 90's style chat room, plus the entire back catalog of bonus episodes from Kristin's previous podcast, Let's Go To Court.

The truth is, facts ALONE won't get you the 6-FIGURE WINNING VERDICT.  If your voice is stuck in monotone (which I know most of y'all are guilty of, because that's one of the very first things we work on… AHEM!), you're handing your jury an invitation to… MENTALLY. CHECK. THE. FUCK. OUT. In this episode, we break down how to harness genuine emotion by diving into the minor mindset shifts and vocal tweaks that transform bland openings into compelling, authentic, jury-winning stories. Tune in and learn exactly how to dial up the emotion (without tipping into full-blown theatrics) and MASTER the sweet spot that moves jurors from PASSIVE LISTENERS to ACTIVE BELIEVERS. Xo, Sari   Mentions: On Becoming a Trial Lawyer – Rick Friedman Quote:  “You want big verdicts? You've got to go there emotionally. This is why the Crew exists, by the way. A big reason. Because we know that figuring out how to put an opening statement together or which voir dire questions to ask is just the start. That alone won't get you where you need to go. ‘Let me put some emotion in my voice' is not going to do it. Why? Because you're never going to put emotion in your voice until you feel you're able to risk emotionally and be vulnerable. That's what it takes.” — Sari de la Motte   * * * * FREE H2H TRAINING * * * *  THREE POWERFUL STRATEGIES TO HELP READ A JUROR'S MIND Understand what the jury is thinking, so you can gain the confidence to trust them - and yourself - in the courtroom. Get the training here:  sariswears.com/jury    Can't get enough of me? Connect with me here: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/saridelamotte/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SariSwears Watch on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@saridelamotte Free FB Group for Plaintiff & Criminal Defense Attorneys https://www.facebook.com/groups/fromhostagetohero/  

Episode 17. Redux 2.0...Threats delivered...Scotzo & Kevin Brown delight the world with the debut of Neworld (Redux 2.0) Van Halen III RE-Reimagined. Taking all the feedback they've gleaned from guests and online comments, we get an even more coherent treatment of what Van Halen III could have been. We take it all in track-by-track, and share the new version with the world: Van Halen III Redux 2.0 on YouTube. And as a bonus, you can now visit our companion website and keep the dream alive: Regarding VHIII Site.A trilogy of Aristotelian hubris and a thesis on the defense of bonelessness as a state of mind, the Regarding...Series serves to validate your boneless desires and sets great boneless expectations for your listening amusement. Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

From Lost In Eros – Book 1A Day of Raucous GamesIn 10 Parts By BradentonLarry.  Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels.The Player laughed cheerfully, and said, “That's an awful lot of questions. I'll tell you what, let's make this interesting.”Peter grinned from ear to ear at this, and both Ilsa and Natalia clapped their hands with glee. Keiko seemed pleased, but was more restrained. Igor did not seem to be paying attention to the conversation.Don and Toshia shared a “this is weird” look, and then she said, “What do you mean ‘interesting'?”“I mean, let's play a game. If you win, or every time you get a point, I'll answer a question to the best of my ability.”“And if you win?” Toshia asked skeptically.The Player smiled, and reached out with the end of his walking stick to run it up along the inside of Toshia's leg. He said, “Oh, I'm sure we can work out something as a prize.”Don looked at Toshia, thinking she would want to talk about this, but she only glanced at Don and then said, “Fine, we'll play, but you have to answer honestly.”“Of course!” the Player laughed. “Excellent! To the game room!”“Yay!” Ilsa and Natalia clapped, as the Player led the group down the hallway.“Are you sure about this?” Don asked Toshia in a low voice.“No,” she admitted, “but we've got to get some answers. This place is huge! We'll never find our way out here before whoever took us finds out we've escaped.”“But what if this is who took us?”“They seem more like inmates than wardens to me.”Don had to admit she had a point there, so he thought about changing the subject. He wondered if he should mention what had almost happened in the secret passageway. He had known Toshia for years, had been persistently in love with her for almost all of that time, and he was frankly worried about scaring her off. On the other hand, he admitted that didn't seem likely. Toshia was very reasonable, which was a big part of why he loved her, and it didn't seem reasonable that she would hold anything that had happened here, or was likely to happen, against him. Besides, he had no idea of what to say. “Sorry I almost fucked you”? He wasn't sorry, and she had definitely been very keen on him actually doing it.Just then, the Player led them to a big pair of doors, which he threw open dramatically. As he led the troupe into the large, open room, which seemed to be about the size of a tennis court to Don, the Player announced, “I know! Let's play dodge ball!”“Great idea!” Peter said. “Help me get the place ready, Igor.”“Dodge ball?” Toshia asked the Player, as the two other men hurried to move various balls and rackets and over-sized chess pieces put into cabinets set into the walls.“You do know how to play, don't you?” the Player asked.“Well, yes,” Toshia said, “I was expecting something like strip poker or chess.”“My dear,” he chuckled, “you're already naked. Though, I must say, it looks very good on you. I have been working on rules for strip chess, but I'm not quite happy with them yet.”“Well, say we agree to dodge ball,” Don cut in. “How do the rules work? There are only two of us and six of you.”“Yes, good point,” the Player paused.“Girls against boys!” Peter shouted from across the room.“Ah, splendid idea, Peter!” grinned the Player.“Well, how's that supposed to work?” Toshia asked.“Hmm, give me a moment,” he said as he tapped his chin with the oddly phallic handle of his walking stick. “Okay, how about this? The men against the women. If the women hit one of us with a throw, you two can ask a question. If a man hits a woman with a throw, he gets to play with her.”“Play with her?”“Have sex,” the Player chuckled. “I forgot for a moment that you're new here. Whatever the gentleman says goes, but no more than one orgasm for him. As it is, we'll have to wait for them to finish before getting back to the game.”“But Don will be on your team?”“Yes, but surely he will do his best for our team,” the Player said, “anything else just wouldn't be sporting. I can assure you that the girls will give it their all for your side. We all love a good game.”Don looked over and saw that all three of the Player's women had slipped out of their dresses and high heels and were stretching in anticipation of the game. He had to admit that they seemed to be in very good shape.“Well, what do you think?” he asked Toshia, who had also been checking out the women.“I think they're hot,” she smirked at him.“Agreed, but what about this game? If you get hit, one of the guys is going to get you.”“And it might be you,” she smiled.“Damn, you're enjoying this,” Don laughed.“Might as well make the best of things, right?” she shrugged, “Besides, you know, I'm spry.”“Okay, fine, but he's right you know, I'll be playing to win.”“Of course,” Toshia laughed.He turned to the Player, and said, “Alright, but I'd like to suggest a rule change. I don't think it's unreasonable to think the men will be throwing harder than the women, so they should get a handicap. How about if they catch one of our throws, ”“Before it bounces,” the Player threw in.“Yes, before it bounces. If a woman catches a throw it counts as a point for them, and we get to ask a question.”“And if we catch one of their throws?”“Well, we get possession of the ball, and that's worth something, isn't it?”The Player laughed, “You're a man after my own heart, Don. Agreed!”Once Igor and Peter were finished with the cleanup, everyone gathered around the Player who explained the rules he had agreed to with Toshia and Don. He reached into a small pocket of his jacket and produced a coin. The women won the toss and got first possession of the ball. As they cleared off to the other side of the room, the Player took off his hat and tails, setting them off to the side with his walking stick.The room itself had a very high ceiling, with bright chandeliers providing illumination. The walls, aside from two doors, were covered with cabinet doors, and the floor was covered with a short-napped checkerboard carpeting. The ball Peter had produced was bright green and a bit smaller than the dodge balls Don and Toshia were used to. The Player had indicated a row of squares in the carpet that split the room in two lengthwise and said that no one was to go in that area. While the ball was in play, the girls had to stay on their end, and the boys on theirs.Don watched as the women conferred briefly before the ball was passed to Toshia as the guest of honor and de facto team leader. She tossed the ball from hand to hand, gave it a bounce on the floor, and then walked toward the middle of the room. Her eyes scanned the row of men who all seemed ready to spring into action, with the exception of Igor, who was paying attention, but who appeared completely disinterested. Looking over at Don, on the far right side of the room, Toshia abruptly shifted and hurled the ball straight at Igor.Igor didn't even try to dodge the throw but caught it without any apparent effort. Without pause, he threw it hard at Ilsa who was the target closest to being straight in front of him. The ball was moving very fast, but Ilsa gracefully stepped out of the way. The ball boomed off a cabinet door on the back wall, and bounced back toward the center of the room. Keiko scrambled to intercept it, and as soon as she had it in her grasp, spun and fired it right at Don.Years of kung fu training stood Don in good stead, for the ball rocketed past him with a foot to spare, even though Keiko's aim had been perfectly accurate. Don got hold of the ball then, and threw it with all his might at Toshia, who lived up to her word and was spry enough to get out of the way.The ball volleyed back and forth quite a few times before anyone scored a point. It was soon apparent that Toshia was the favorite target on her side, so she had to work quite hard to avoid getting hit. The women were more even handed, except that they all seemed to be avoiding throwing at Igor. Don could see why; the short man gave no sport and had a disconcerting ability to catch the ball and fire it back with dangerous precision. Ultimately, though, it was the women who scored the first point. Peter tried to catch a throw from Natalia, but the ball managed to slip through his grasp. Don couldn't help but groan a little at his team's loss, even though it meant that the Player would now answer a question.Toshia stepped up to the line of forbidden carpet squares, and said, “How do we get out of here? And I mean this whole building, not just this room.”“Nice save,” Don chuckled.The Player paused to consider, and then said, “I've never tried to leave, and I really don't know why anyone would want to, but you can get out of the building by going out into the garden. I don't know if there's anything interesting outside the garden.”“How do we get to the garden?” Toshia asked.“No,” the Player laughed. “That's another question. Throw the ball, Peter.”Toshia had to throw herself flat on the ground to dodge the fast moving pitch from Peter. Another series of determined volleys followed. As if to make up for his earlier flub, it was Peter who scored the next point by hitting Ilsa in the left tit when Toshia ducked out of the way right in front of her.Everyone clapped, and the Player directed Peter and Ilsa to the center of the room so everyone could watch. Don moved over to sit down on the floor next to Toshia. He planned to ask her how she was doing, but he could tell that she was more interested at the moment in what Peter and Ilsa were doing.Ilsa was almost as tall as Peter, and they met in the center of the room with a long passionate kiss. His hands moved up to caress her very large tits, while hers immediately pulled up his kilt to get at his flaccid member. Her stroking and pulling on it soon had it at half-mast, and then she dropped to her knees in front of him. Without any preliminaries, Ilsa began to suck on it, taking almost the entire length into her mouth at first. As it got harder and longer, she took less of it, though occasionally she would slowly sink down on the entire length, taking the head and a good part of the shaft into her throat. Though he was entitled by the rules to anything, Peter seemed quite content with the quietly intense blowjob he was getting. As he began to rock his hips, fucking his cock in and out of her mouth and throat, Ilsa moaned in approval and increased the speed and strength of her sucking. When Peter began to come, he pulled away from Ilsa's mouth and shot stream after stream of cum on her face, neck and full tits. Everyone clapped, and Keiko and Natalia hurried over to help Ilsa up. Don was a bit surprised and quite titillated to see Keiko enthusiastically lean in to lick and suck Peter's cum from Ilsa's tit and neck.Looking to his side, Don noticed that Toshia was also watching the girls. Then, noticing that he was looking at her, Toshia looked back at Don and then quickly glanced down at the very hard erection he was again sporting.“Okay, well back to the game,” the Player called. “But this is going to take forever, so I suggest we add another ball. Any objections?”There were none, so a second ball was produced. Ilsa had one, and Don had the other. Don's flew straight at Toshia, while Ilsa's shot straight at his head. Toshia dodged, but Don took the hit, which knocked him to the side a bit.As he shook his head to clear it of stars, Toshia asked, “How do we get to the garden?”“I honestly do not recall at the moment,” the Player said. Seeing that this answer wasn't acceptable, he added, “However, if you like, later, we'll help you find the garden. I promise.”Toshia and Don agreed that this was fair enough, and the game resumed. Now that there were two balls in play things were much trickier. The women seemed to coordinate their attacks a bit better than the men, who were basically just throwing at the increasingly tired Toshia. The other girls tried to help out by trying to catch the thrown balls. At one point, Keiko caught a ball only to be hit a split second later. Everyone agreed to call that a draw. The next point was won by Toshia and Natalia who managed to catch the Player with a fast combination that effectively drove him into the second ball.“Who brought us here?” Toshia asked.The Player frowned, and said, “I'm afraid I really don't know. I do have a suggestion as to who you should ask though.”The Player had picked up the ball that had hit him, and Don had the other, both had their sights set on Toshia.When Toshia asked, “Who?” he laughed and said, “That's another question.” Both he and Don threw their balls almost simultaneously.Toshia was used to this by now, though, and was able to twist to the side and down just in time to avoid getting hit. The Player's ball smacked off a side wall and was then plucked out of the air by nimble Keiko. Don's ball, though, smacked into Natalia's shoulder.Everyone cheered Don's luck, including, he noticed, Toshia. As Natalia moved to the middle of the room, Don looked intently at Toshia, who responded by nodding in Natalia's direction and giving him a shooing gesture. “Have fun!” she said with a big grin.Natalia had already gotten down on her knees and was watching him approach with a soft smile and glittering eyes. Don noticed that her hair was still immaculately coifed, despite all the exertions of the game. Of course, he also noticed that there was an exceptionally beautiful woman on her knees in front of him, who was now stroking and kissing his cock. From where he was standing Don could see Ilsa, Keiko and Peter, but couldn't see Toshia, though he knew she was watching. Remembering her reaction in the secret passageway, Don decided he would put on something of a show. He gently stepped to the side, moving slowly so Natalia could move with him, so that Toshia had a good view from the side, as she had for Peter and Ilsa.Don's cock was now fully hard again, and he began to fuck in and out of Natalia's mouth. He pulled almost all the way out and then slowly pushed back in, letting Toshia see the shaft sliding in and out. Natalia knelt there passively with her hands resting on her thighs, allowing Don to set the pace. He held her head lightly in his hands, but was careful not to obstruct Toshia's view of his cock and Natalia's mouth.Though this felt wonderful, and Don knew with all the pent-up tension he'd accumulated since waking up he could easily come very soon, he wanted to do more than just shoot his cum on Natalia as Peter had done to Ilsa. He pulled his cock away from Natalia's mouth, and said, “Please get up on your hands and knees. Face toward Toshia.”Natalia happily complied, and Don moved around behind her and got down on his knees. Looking up to make sure Toshia was watching, Don smiled and took his cock in hand and rubbed the head of it up and down along Natalia's moist lips. She pushed back at him, encouraging him to take her. Don was all too happy to oblige, and pushed the fat head of his cock into her welcoming cunt. Sliding in slowly, he reveled in the sensations as her sheath of soft, moist flesh and strong muscles took him in, spreading to accommodate his thickness. Once he was all the way in, he paused a moment, and then began to pull back out, almost all the way. Then he drove back in all the way, shoving Natalia forward. She caught her balance by shoving her hands out a bit further. She cried out with a little yelp as he filled her so abruptly, his balls slapping against her clit. One more torturous withdrawal and another savage filling, which respectively elicited a moan and a yelp from Natalia, and then Don began to seriously fuck her. He held her by the waist, fucking in and out of her cunt with abandon. Natalia shoved back against him, crying out with pleasure. Don felt her fingers against him as she played with her clit. Looking up, he saw that Toshia was watching both of them, and the expressions on Natalia's face in particular. Although his orgasm was building quickly, Don was surprised that Natalia beat him to it. She screamed and pushed back against him, and he felt her cunt squeezing and pulling on him.Then Don was coming. It felt like he shot a geyser of cum into Natalia, and then another and another. His balls and cock seemed to be shooting his very life into this woman's sweet cunt. Pulse after pulse of semen moved through him into her body. Don was dimly aware that he had thrown his head back and was still coming into Natalia, but all he could feel was the spasming of his cock and the trembling all through his body.Finally, when he opened his eyes, he saw that Natalia had sprawled forward on the carpet with her ass in the air and his cock still deep in her cunt. Everyone in the room was applauding and cheering, including Toshia. Eventually, Don pulled out of Natalia, who whimpered a bit before Keiko, Ilsa, and Toshia came over to help her up. Don had a happy grin on his face, as he watched Toshia with the other girls.She looked at him with a mischievous grin and said, “Look what a mess you made!” She drew his attention down to the cum that was slowly running down the inside of Natalia's thighs. Then Toshia shocked him by reaching down and scooping a healthy glob of it on her fingers. Looking him straight in the eye, Toshia promptly carried the cum to her mouth and sucked it down.She laughed at the expression on his face, and said, “You better get back to your side.”Both Don and Natalia were hardly playing at their best after their encounter, but it was Toshia who got hit next. Certainly the exertion of dodging the vast majority of throws thrown at her team had something to do with the fact that she was unable to dodge the ball that caught her. Another factor was the ball thrown by Peter that she'd had to duck low to avoid. When the Player threw the next ball in that instant, Toshia hardly even saw it coming.In spite of everything that had happened, and everything he'd seen from Toshia leading up to this point, Don was surprised to see how quickly she got into the center of the room and down on her knees. By the time, Don had taken his place with a view, the Player had come up to stand in front of her. He was so tall that Toshia had to look up to get the head of his cock into her mouth as it dangled there in front of him. Don watched raptly as Toshia reached up with both hands to stroke and pull at the long cock in front of her, sucking on the head all the while.As the long black shaft got harder and began to stand up, Toshia sat back and the Player took a small step away from her. Both of Toshia's hands were wrapped around the organ now, and she was bobbing her head a little as she sucked on the head.Don noticed that his hand was in his lap, squeezing his own cock, which was surprisingly enough beginning to return to its usual raging erection. He noticed that Keiko, who was sitting about six feet to his right was looking at him and the cock in his hand.Toshia's fingers now couldn't wrap around the Player's cock, and it was so hard that she had to let it out of her mouth. She leaned in to kiss and suck on his big balls, while reaching up to continue caressing his cock. Then she got up and bent over to continue sucking on the head of his cock. Don found himself thinking that he would love to get up and get behind Toshia now as she was bent over like that.Don noticed that Keiko was crawling closer to him. She smiled at him and sat down next to him, turning back to watch the show.The Player leaned down to say something to Toshia. Without taking her mouth off his cock, she nodded emphatically. He said something else, which met with another nod, and then she released his cock. The Player promptly and gracefully lay down on his back. Toshia leaned over him to kiss and lick his cock, which now lay on top of his belly. She ran her hands over the big phallus lovingly, and straddled his thighs. Gradually she worked her way up until she was over the base of his cock. After pausing there to rub her cunt and clit against the underside of his fat, hard organ, she kissed the head of his cock and then got to her feet over him.Don felt Keiko's hand steal into his lap and take hold of his cock. He also noticed that on the other side of the room Natalia had her head in Peter's lap. Apparently, the Player's little entourage th

Episode 16. Go Boneless...A bonus episode where Scott "Mini-Manifesto" Monroe unloads and revisits our past three seasons pulling a golden thread that ties three otherwise random works of rock-obscurea together through the Regarding...Boneless Framework. That and a boneless jurist prudence update to keep your legal briefs stuffed and ready for saucin'. Scotzo even throws in a new track: Regarding Boneless Wings!A trilogy of Aristotelian hubris and a thesis on the defense of bonelessness as a state of mind, the Regarding...Series serves to validate your boneless desires and sets great boneless expectations for your listening amusement. Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

Episode 16. Go Boneless...A bonus episode where Scott "Mini-Manifesto" Monroe unloads and revisits our past three seasons pulling a golden thread that ties three otherwise random works of rock-obscurea together through the Regarding...Boneless Framework. That and a boneless jurist prudence update to keep your legal briefs stuffed and ready for saucin'. Scotzo even throws in a new track: Regarding Boneless Wings!A trilogy of Aristotelian hubris and a thesis on the defense of bonelessness as a state of mind, the Regarding...Series serves to validate your boneless desires and sets great boneless expectations for your listening amusement. Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

BORN TO BE COSMO - Episode 46Original Air Date: February 16, 2025Join Blutrane, NateWolfeTCG, and ZombiesGoNomNom as we talk about all things Marvel SNAP, and of course... Keep it Cosmo! This episode's topics: --OTA/Updated Cards (Doom 2099, Wiccan, Surtur, Scorpion, Sunspot, Sera, Adam Warlock)--Character Mastery--Zombies' Poll Re: Character Mastery--New Card: Captain America Sam Wilson--Meta Decks

Episode 15. Van Halen IV...oh what tho could have been. Scotzo, Chaz, and Wolfie are joind by the Dave & Dave Unchained boys for a wild ride through the missed expectations and fan let down that was the hype, lead up to, and ultimate WTF it's over ending for the VHIII iteration of the band, as they were on the path to delivering a second record with Gary Cherone. Based on what we know, should it remain "in the stinker", or should some WB executive's kid dig the Van Halen "Love" CD out of that box in the garage from dad's old office and post it to the inter-webs? You be the judge...Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

Episode 15. Van Halen IV...oh what tho could have been. Scotzo, Chaz, and Wolfie are joind by the Dave & Dave Unchained boys for a wild ride through the missed expectations and fan let down that was the hype, lead up to, and ultimate WTF it's over ending for the VHIII iteration of the band, as they were on the path to delivering a second record with Gary Cherone. Based on what we know, should it remain "in the stinker", or should some WB executive's kid dig the Van Halen "Love" CD out of that box in the garage from dad's old office and post it to the inter-webs? You be the judge...Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem.Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album. At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

D&P Highlight: Which state have the most *ahem* diseases? full 496 Fri, 14 Feb 2025 19:55:00 +0000 DSMVh5uPSHrF3pcA2Ek6wuw5y63Gfa5C news The Dana & Parks Podcast news D&P Highlight: Which state have the most *ahem* diseases? You wanted it... Now here it is! Listen to each hour of the Dana & Parks Show whenever and wherever you want! 2024 © 2021 Audacy, Inc. News False https://player.amperwavepodcasting.

It's Matt's 93rd episode and thus Travis and he bring the same energy a 93 year old would bring to this week's episode!The guys chat up the Pokal win over FCA and the Buli win over BVB and celebrate not only the victories, but the tactical ability to play both fun and dynamic - as well as gritty and defensive - depending on the day.Hot topics include Demi playing a role, Deniz's struggles, Sebastian's tactical flexibility, BVB's seeming unlikability, Anton helping out his former club, and, of course, how Matt and Travis were 100% accurate on how key Jeff Chabot would be this season.Ahem.All that and a some Peter Stormare to end the episode!

She's had the organist. Now she wants the Vicar.A Series in 17 parts, by Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Mia weakly raised her hand and switched off the shower."That was amazing, Gordy-pie. Organists really are good with their hands!""Not so bad yourself," he panted. "Wow. I enjoyed that immensely! You're quite a lass, Mia.""I'd like to see you play the organ," she said, stepping out of the shower and reaching for a towel."I need to get my breath back first!" He laughed, as Mia began playfully drying him off. "God, you're an eager little beaver aren't you?""Hee hee. Yes, but what I meant was, I'd like to see you play the church organ. I've not been inside a church for years. Jenna said that St Michael's is cool.""It's a nice church." I wonder what else she's told her? Gordon thought. "Why not come along to the Sunday service? You can see me in action there, so to speak. After the service, you can have a go on the organ if you'd like. Do you play any musical instruments?""Guitar and violin, but I've not practiced for ages.""Ah, so strings are your thing? That's good. It'd be nice to have a violinist in the choir. One of the choristers plays the trumpet. Which keeps him from singing and I'm glad of it as his voice is bloody awful."Mia sniggered. "You're funny, Gordy-pie. I really like you. Are all organists as fun as you?""Nay lass. I'm one of a kind. He pulled her close and kissed her neck and lips. He was an incredible kisser, and she was curious to know more about him."Are you married?""Long divorced," came his reply. "I'm married to the pipe organ, as they say." He wondered if Jenna had mentioned anything about their various liaisons over the past year, and was about to say something, when the bathroom door suddenly opened."Jen! Ever thought of knocking before entering?" Mia gasped, covering herself with a towel."I can't leave you alone for five minutes can I?" She turned to Gordon, who grinned sheepishly at her."Um, hello!""Funny place to have organ lessons, Gordon," Jenna said, as she watched him squirm."Gordy-pie was just showing me how good an organist is with his hands, weren't you?" Mia said, kissing him. "And you know what, he's amazing!""Oh I'm well aware of how good he is," Jenna replied, folding her arms.Sensing disapproval, Gordon attempted to explain. "It just happened. I didn't know your cousin was here," he prattled. "I put the plant pots in the yard, went into the kitchen and she was just there, wearing nothing but a towel!""You don't need to explain yourself, Gordy-pie. We've not done anything wrong," Mia said. "We're both single. Why are you so uptight, Jenna? Is it because we're in the vicarage? Is that like, a sin or something?"Jenna was in no position to claim the moral high ground. "No, no of course not. I was, just a bit surprised, that's all. It's fine. Just, try to be a bit more discreet, Mia. What if Simon had walked in?""Oh I'm sure the good reverend would approve," Gordon smiled, winking at her.The perceptive Mia noticed his gesture and wondered what he was hinting at."Jenna took a deep breath. "Okay, well I'm going to have a coffee. I'll leave you to get dressed. Do you want a drink, Gordon?""A tea would be lovely. I'm parched. Thanks!""I'll have tea as well, please." Mia added.Jenna left the bathroom."She's acting weird," Mia said. "There's something she's not telling me."Oh boy, wait until you find out, Gordon thought. Your mind will be blown."Maybe she's a bit envious!" Gordon said as he picked up his clothes, and wondered where his underpants had gone."Can I keep these, Gordy-pie?" Mia giggled, holding up his white briefs."Think they're too big for you!""I don't want to wear them. I want to keep them under my pillow and sniff them at night.""In that case, they're all yours! But I want your knickers in return!""Fair's fair!" She tossed him her pale pink cotton undies to him."Thanks!""I loved our shower time," Mia said, kissing him again. "And I loved your big cock. You're a sexy man, Gordy-pie.""Gordy-pie hopes Mia-pie can play with his organ again very soon!" the organist replied as they got dressed and headed downstairs.Jenna brought them both a cup of tea as they sat down in the lounge."Gordon, you're not going to put up with her calling you that cringey nickname are you?" she said, handing him the cup."I like it. It's cute," he said, as Mia rested her head on his shoulder."It's childish. If someone had called you that a year ago, you'd have bitten their head off. You used to have a terrible temper.""Ah well that was before I saw the light," he said, sipping his tea. "When you, showed me the way." He smiled at Jenna as she sat opposite them. "For that, you know I am forever grateful," he added."Did you become a born again Christian like Jenna, Gordy-pie?" Mia asked."I've always been a Christian," Gordon replied. "I just sin a lot, that's all. As we all do, right?" He raised an eyebrow at the vicar's wife. "But we keep praying for forgiveness every week, and luckily for us, God is the forgiving sort, eh?"The front door opened and Reverend Morris came in."Good lord, I need a large brandy!" He gasped, tossing the car keys on the table."What I have seen, can't be unseen, and what I've heard, can't be unheard!""Whatever's the matter Simon?" Jenna said, standing up."You were right, Jen. Gladys Wilcox and the churchwarden. They're, at it!""Told you so," Jenna said. "Actual sex? I'm not being ageist but can Gladys manage that at her age?""No. Regular vanilla sex would've been easier to deal with. Actually, I think gerbilling would be easier to deal with. But seeing Norman, naked in her backyard, wearing a pinny and being struck on his arse with a riding crop,”Jenna cleared her throat, trying to silence him, given that they had company." She treats him like a slave and he enjoys it!" The vicar continued, unaware there was an audience. "And there's more. She knows about the storeroom threesome, and you won't believe this, she proudly told me, that sometime during Lent, she performed oral sex on Gordon.""Ahem. Simon, shush, we've got," Jenna cringed. "Wait, what? She gave Gordon oral?"Mia's jaw dropped."Sucked him off whilst he was sat at the church organ! She'd wanted him to be her slave, but he declined. So she set her sights on Norman instead. Well we both know Gordon prefers a younger woman, right?" He turned round, and noticed Gordon sat on the settee, and Mia sat next to him."Oh, good afternoon Gordon!""I brought those plant pots you wanted," the organist meekly uttered.Later,Jenna and Reverend Morris sat on the settee watching an episode of Father Brown, although neither were really paying attention to it."I can't get that image out of my head. Gladys giving Gordon a blowjob and whipping Norman's bare buttocks. I know we've, engaged in some naughtiness, but I never imagined one of the oldest members of the church was into that sort of thing!""Good for her," Jenna replied. "Kinkiness aside, it's nice for her to have Norman as a lodger. I mean, she lives alone and in this day and age, older people can feel vulnerable. I know Gladys misses her hubby a lot.""Oh Bert. Yes. He was dead long before I came to St Michaels. Bishop George told me more about him. He was the organist before Gordon took over. Apparently he was quite a character.""I'm sure he was. And the current organist seems to be going the same way.""Jen, you seem a bit unhappy about Gordon having intercourse with your cousin today. Is that because you're protective of her or because of, well, I know how close you are to him?"Jenna sighed. "Oh Simon. I'm ashamed of myself. I actually felt jealous when I saw the two of them together. How selfish is that? After everything you did for me last year when it was my birthday, and you gladly accepted my dalliances with the other male members of the church. Can you forgive me? I wish to say a prayer of forgiveness."The vicar took his wife's hands in his. "Of course I can, my love. And I understand how you feel. You see, with Mia here, I think you've got something you've never had to deal with before.""What's that?""A rival!"Mia was eavesdropping from the staircase. A mischievous grin formed on her face as she listened."Holy shit, Jenna's had more men than Elton John's had wigs. She had the nerve to have a go at me for seducing Tom. And she's slept with Gordon too? No wonder she looked so tense. Ha! And sweet, Reverend Simon is okay with that? That's not what it teaches in the Bible, surely?"She slipped back to her bedroom."Let us pray together," Reverend Morris said."Father, I return to You with my sins before me. Nowadays, I lack compassion for my brother and sisters, my eyes are clouded with wrongdoings my heart is against. Opposing Your Words, I sinned and done evil in Your eyes. I drained myself off Your kindness and followed my worldly desires. Father, guide me as You are right in Your verdict and justified in Your judgment. Do not leave me astray as I pray for a blissful life with You and a life free of evil. In Your Mercy, I pray.Amen."-(Luke 15:18, Psalm 51:3-4)"I feel better," Jenna said, opening her eyes. She ran a finger down her husband's cheek. "Simon, let's go to bed. Mia's asleep. The guest bedroom is right at the other end of the landing. She won't hear us. Tonight I need my Vicar's touch,”"What a good idea! All this talk of Gladys Wilcox getting her hands on men's dicks, I'd quite like some hands on mine!"A Girl With FantasiesMia lay back on the bed in the darkness, her mind buzzing with the events of the day. Reaching under the pillow, she pulled out the pair of Gordon's briefs."Enjoyed you, Gordy-pie! You were a total sweetie."She sighed, pressing the crotch of the underwear against her nose and inhaling deeply, whilst fingering herself with her other hand. Gordon's undies bore a pleasant, musky, manly scent, a faint mark which she assumed was pre-cum, and a couple of wiry grey pubic hairs. Perfect. Knowing that the organist's thick cock had been snugly contained within was enough to make her climax again. She wondered if he was wanking off and sniffing her knickers."Hope he likes mine too." She wanted to see the organist again, as sex with him had been amazing, but Mia had her sights set on a bigger prize - and this one wore a clerical collar.InsomniaGordon was in bed, but having difficulty sleeping. His mind was a complete whirl. He reflected how in the past year, he'd gone from being completely sex-starved, to having more sex than he'd ever had during a whole fifteen years of marriage, and during his late teens, when he'd been a horny youth, desperate to sleep with any woman. In the Eighties, those halcyon pre-Internet days, just stumbling across a discarded porn magazine in the bushes was more valuable than gold. He remembered his time at university, when he used to spy on the nurses undressing at a nearby hospital.He chuckled as he remembered losing his virginity to his piano teacher - whilst she was giving him a tour of Blackpool Tower ballroom. He credited her with starting his interest in wanting to play organs,"Look at me now," he said out loud. "I got seduced by a woman young enough to be my daughter. Who is now the vicar's wife. I fucked a Ukrainian woman in the church. I've been fucking the vicar's wife every week in the church. I took part in a threesome with her and the vicar. I and several other men gave her a facial in the church. I got my dick sucked by an eighty-six year old pensioner too. Now I'm fucking the eighteen-year old cousin of the vicar's wife, and exchanging underwear with her."He reached for the pair of pink knickers and gave them a good sniff, stroking his cock at the same time. The crotch had dried, but earlier it had been wet and sticky with Mia's pussy juices. A heavenly scent."The world is a bloody mess right now, but I'd say my life is pretty good," he smiled. "I hope Mia wants to see me again. She's a lovely, horny little thing. I hope she comes to church this Sunday."He wanked himself off happily, before slipping into a blissful slumber. For the first time in a year, he dreamt of a woman other than Jenna.Mia's DelightMia was edging closer to an orgasm as she continued to pleasure herself. Gordon's briefs pressed against her face were having the desired effect, but oh, God, she wished she had a large dildo as well. Her sopping pussy was aching to be filled again.Hearing muffled laughter on the landing, brought her back to her senses. The sound of a bedroom door closing. More laughter.She slid off the bed and wiped her hand on her t-shirt. Tiptoeing to the door, she opened it, and listened. The inky darkness of the landing was disturbed by a light under Jenna's bedroom door.With the stealth of a cat, Mia slunk down the landing. Standing in front of the door, the sounds from within were clearer. The creak of a bedframe. The headboard bumping against the wall. The low moans of the reverend, followed by the higher pitched gasps of Jenna.She bit her lip as she listened to their carnal sounds. Squinting, she peered through the keyhole. The tiny opening barely allowed an interested voyeur to see a thing, but just briefly, she glimpsed Reverend Morris' bare backside rising and falling. Lying between her cousin's legs which, likewise entirely bare, were extended straight upwards into the air."Hosanna! Hosanna! Hosanna, in, the, Highest Heavens!" Reverend Morris yelled, to which Jenna responded by screaming in ecstasy.Mia clamped her hand against her mouth to stifle a laugh. At the same time, her pussy tingled like crazy. That the good vicar quoted Biblical phrases during sex, turned her on in a way she never expected."I am coming soon! Hold on to what you have, so that no one will take your crown!"This quote from the Book of Revelation proved too much, and seconds later, Jenna climaxed, with a scream.Mia tried to remain silent as she too, came. With a wildly beating heart, she shuffled back to her bedroom."I want him. I want Reverend Morris to fuck me like that."Reverend Morris is seduced, but can he satisfy her?Lightning flashed, followed by a crash of thunder so powerful it rattled the kitchen windows. The storm began not with a sprinkle or drizzle but with a sudden downpour, as if clouds were hollow structures that could shatter like eggshells and spill their entire contents at once. So far, July was proving far less flaming than June."Blimey," Reverend Morris said, as the rain made him look up from his laptop. "Not a good start to Mia's first day in her new job, is it?""A bit of summer rain won't bother her," Jenna replied. "Her mind's probably fixated on Gordon.""Heh, give her some credit, Jen. She's shown initiative. I think she'll work hard and be a good cleaner for the church. She did an excellent job tidying up our kitchen.""That's true. She should be about finished in around twenty minutes. Ten hours a week isn't much. I wonder what her long-term plans are? I mean, she can't clean the church hall toilets for the rest of her life can she? And I must phone Aunt Kathleen, I keep putting it off. She'll go berserk when she finds out what's happened."Reverend Morris sipped his coffee. "Have faith in her, Jen. She's chosen this path for herself. And as my dad always says, never put off until tomorrow what can be done today. Right, I have to pop over to the church. I'll check in on Mia and see if she's okay with setting the alarm system. Don't know if she wants some lunch with us or if she has plans of her own?"Jenna picked up the phone. "She didn't say. Okay, I'm going to bite the bullet and phone Aunt Kathleen."In the church hall, Jenna had finished using the floor-polishing machine on the wooden floor. The two hours had flown by. As well as making the floor spotless after this morning's yoga class, she'd cleaned the toilets and emptied the bins. The work was boring, as the vicar had warned her, but an absolute doddle. For £12 an hour, she couldn't complain. It was the easiest cash she'd ever earned. It was far better than stacking shelves in Aldi and having to deal with abusive members of the public. The church toilets hadn't been the horror show she'd braced herself for - even the gents were reasonable. The good chaps of St Michaels had good manners and good aim it would seem!Outside, more thunder boomed. The sound of the rain. The rain. The cold merciless sound of the rain."Ugh," Mia muttered, looking out of the window. "I hate weather like this."It was typical British weather. The storm had washed all the color out of the day. The sky was as charry as burnt-out ruins. Wind-driven rain, grey as iron nails, hammered every surface, and road gutters overflowed with filthy water.Mia returned the machine to the store cupboard and locked it. She checked her phone. Nearly 1 o'clock.The sound of the main door opening made her jump."Oh Reverend Simon!""Hello Mia. Just checking to see how you're getting on. Have you finished?""Yes, I'm done. I was just going to set the alarm thingy." She noticed how wet his black shirt was."Great stuff, you're okay with setting it?""Oh no worries there.""Little tip if you're working in the hall by yourself, be sure to lock the main door. Anyone could walk in. We're lucky we don't get a lot of crime round here, but for your own safety, it's best to lock yourself in. There are lots of places someone could hide. Right, well I'm just heading into the church to sort a few things out ready for the curate's ordination on Sunday. Jenna's prepared some lunch if you're hungry, oh and be warned, she's phoning your mum.""What? Oh no! Why's she doing that?" Mia pouted."Look, don't panic, she's just letting her know that your safe and well and staying with us. You don't want your poor parents to be worrying themselves to death not knowing where you've gone do you?""Well no. But I don't want Mum turning up.""I don't think you need to worry. Your mum lives in Buxton doesn't she? That's a good fifty miles from here. I don't think she'll drive up here today. But at some point you'll have to speak to her."Mia looked down. "I like it here. I don't want to go back to my parents. Of course, I don't want to be a burden to you,”"You're no burden Mia, please don't think that. If you want to talk, why not join me in the church when you've finished locking up?" He left the hall and Mia took that as an open invitation."Oh I'll join you, Vicar, but I want to do more than talk!"A few minutes later, having successfully set the alarm, Mia dashed over to the church, trying to avoid getting soaked by the rain. The ancient oak door's handle turned stubbornly. She wondered why Reverend Morris hadn't bothered to lock himself in either, then she remembered something Jenna had said about the church "always having to be open for those in need."And Mia was in need all right.Reverend Morris was in the vestry, having just changed out of his damp shirt and into a dry one. He'd donned his regular cassock and surplice, as he always did when in the church, even though he was off duty. He inspected the row of church vestments on the clothes rail. Some items were missing. Some members of the choir weren't the tidiest, and often neglected to hang their surplices back up after the services.Mia walked down the aisle of St Michael's church, glancing round. The incessant pounding of rain on the roof seemed magnified here in this old, airy building. Then the organ pipes to the right of the altar caught her eye. The highly-polished silver colored pipes reflected what little light was shining through the stained glass windows."Impressive," she muttered, admiring the many pipes. "But where are its, keyboards? No wait, manuals. He called them manuals." She looked round, and noticed the organ console behind the pulpit."Ah!"Mia walked over to it. She ran her hand down the wooden stool. "So this is where Gordy-pie sits." Giving a little mischievous giggle, she looked round. There was no sign of Reverend Morris anywhere, so she slid herself onto the stool."Look at this thing. It's like, unreal. All these buttons and stuff It's like a flight deck." Her feet touched the organ's pedalboard. "How the hell does he remember all these? She looked closely at some of the stops. They all had weird-sounding names on them. Diapason, Mixture, Gemshorn."I wonder what these knobs do?" She switched on the small lamp above the manuals, in order to get a better look.Curiosity got the better of her and she fiddled with a couple of stops and pressed a few keys on the lower manual. Nothing happened, seeing as the organ was switched off."Hmm, must be like an electronic piano." She idly pressed down several more keys, pretending to play."Witness the great maestro Mia at work," she said out loud, putting on a fake Geordie accent to mimic presenters, Ant and Dec. "Here on Britain's Got Talent, Mia will now play some of her favorite songs for the audience. Starting with Titanium by David Guetta!" She flung her arms around, as though conducting an orchestra, and accidentally hit the red on/off button above the manuals."This is being live-streamed. Be sure to vote!" Mia slammed her fingers down hard on the middle manual. "I am Titanium!"The organ responded at once, with a deep, radiant sound that seemed to rattle the entire foundations of the church. It was so loud, the stool seemed to vibrate."Shit!!" Mia gasped as she got the shock of her life. Fearing she'd damaged the organ, she panicked and froze on the spot.In the vestry, Reverend Morris had finished re-arranging the vestments, when the booming note from the organ shattered his peace and quiet."What the," He almost jumped out of his skin. "Bloody hell, Gordon. You sure pick your moments to come and practice."When nothing but silence followed that ear-splitting note, he headed out of the vestry to investigate.Mia's fingers were trembling. "Fuck, what did I do?""Well, well. What do we have here?" Reverend Morris chuckled as he appeared beside the console."Eep! I didn't mean to, Simon. I was just, I,”"Ha, it's alright, don't panic!" He said."I caught something and it made that noise.""You managed to switch it on, that's all!" He indicated the red button."Oh, so it's not broken then?" Mia said, getting her breath back."No, of course not. It's seen a lot of heavy use. It can cope with a lot!""It looks so complicated. How does Gordon play it?""With ease, because he's had years of practice. Jenna's just learned to play it, and said how hard it was. No use asking me. I haven't a clue. I'm not musically talented it all. In fact I'll tell you something. I can't even read music.""Really?" Mia replied."I'm hopeless," the vicar continued. "Jenna's tried to introduce me to the piano, but I've got poor co-ordination. My fingers go all over the place. My attempts sounded like Les Dawson."Mia blinked. "Who?""Never mind. He's from before your time." He pressed down a couple of the organ's keys and made a feeble attempt at playing a few notes."Gordon says you have to use your whole body when playing a pipe organ." Mia said, giving him a dreamy grin."He's right, you do.""Do you have to use your whole body when preaching to the congregation, Simon?""Ah, well that depends," he said, switching off the organ and the lamp. "I definitely have to keep my mind focused. Especially during the sermon.""I can imagine. I bet you're amazing. I like your church robes.""Oh thanks! It's called a cassock and surplice. Um, why not come to the Sunday service if you're curious? You don't need to take communion if you're not comfortable.""I've been confirmed," Mia replied. "I'm okay with that.""It's the curate's ordination service on Sunday afternoon too. "That will be quite a spectacle. The Bishop will be performing the ceremony. We're expecting lots of people to attend. Afterwards there'll be a buffet in the hall. Nice social occasion. There'll be more people your own age there."Mia shrugged. "I'm not mad keen on people my own age," she said."I see. Well, Gordon will be there, so that's a reason to attend, surely?" Reverend Morris cleared his throat. "You like him a lot, don't you?""Oh yes. He is lovely. He's really sexy! But you know what? You're sexy too. I hope it's not a sin to compliment a vicar in church?"The flustered reverend's cheeks turned pink. "Oh not at all! Very kind of you to say, Mia."Yes, very sexy,” she purred, and without hesitating, stood up and kissed him on the lips."M-Mia, what are you doing?" Reverend Morris spluttered, backing away.She ignored his question and slipped her arms round his shoulders. "I am worshipping you, Reverend Simon. Like I said, I think you're really sexy,”"B-but, but, I am a married man!" He stammered.Mia breathed in the scent of his aftershave. "And? Jenna's a married woman, yet she seems to have slept with half of the men of this church. And you're like, okay with that?""Did Jenna tell you all this?" He gasped. This time, he made no attempt to free himself from her grasp."She didn't need to. I overheard.""You shouldn't eavesdrop, Mia.""Yes I know, but come on. Seriously? What kind of open marriage do you guys have? Is that church rules or something? How can you be cool with that?"Reverend Morris still made no attempt to move. "Well it's not like you think. I love Jenna so much. I just fell for her big time. She had quite effect on the men of this church when she first started attending, not just me. I was trapped in a sexless marriage at the time. I er, thought the first time we had sex, it was a wild one-off."This explanation failed to satisfy Mia. "And Gordon?""The thing with Gordon, well before Jenna came along, he was a very unhappy, angry man. She made him feel happier than he had been in years. And the choir were beyond grateful for his change in personality, let me tell you.""I see. So Jen just has this natural talent for seducing all these lonely men and cheering them up? A gift from God? In that case, what I'm doing isn't a sin then is it?"She kissed the vicar again, longer and harder."Mia, wait!" He protested. "I can't,”"Of course you can, Reverend Simon. "You've been so kind to me, letting me stay at the vicarage and getting me this job. It's time I repaid that kindness.""Yes, but, I thought you liked Gordon!""I do like Gordon. I just like you too. Don't you find me attractive, just like you find Jenna attractive?"He would've been lying if he'd said no, and his erection was already proof."Yes. You're beautiful," Reverend Morris said, running a finger down her cheek. "Such smooth skin,” Instinctively, he bent down and pressed his lips against hers."Heavenly,”Mia unbuttoned her top, and guided his hands to her small and beautiful tits for him to squeeze and play with."Give me a blessing, Reverend," Mia whispered.The vicar took her hand, led her into the vestry and quoted a passage from Numbers."May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord's face shine upon you and be gracious to you, may the Lord turn his face to you and bring you peace.""Amen," Mia said. After a brief silence, something seemed to snap in Reverend Morris, and he cast off his reluctance."Let me get your legs," he whispered, his voice quavering a bit with sexual tension.Stroking from the knee down, to start. Then Mia felt his holy hands open and slide up the back of her thighs, pushing her skirt up."Spread your legs a bit."His thumbs caressed her inner thigh, and came close, oh so close to her pussy. She wasn't wearing any underwear and he bent down to smell her sex. His thumbs tantalizingly close. Now his hands were on her arse. Seductive massage, strokes, and squeezes nearly sent Mia over the edge. She moaned."Oh yes," he breathed. "Praise the Lord,”Mia's hands roamed across his surplice, and her eagerness surprised him. "Hold on a sec," he said, removing the garment, and starting to unbutton his cassock. When it was open, his black trousers were revealed, along with a straining bulge. She squeezed his hard arse cheeks and pulled him against her. His cock throbbed. Mia unfastened his belt and unzipped his trousers. Seconds later, she pulled his boxer shorts down.He groaned when she took his hot cock into her warm hand, cupping his balls with her other. His cock was thick and of decent length, though not, she noted as big as Gordon's or Tom's. Gordon's was the biggest of the lot. Mia couldn't help be a little disappointed, though of course what one did with something was what counted, not the size.I wonder if this is why Jenna goes with all the other church guys, because Reverend Simon just isn't enough to satisfy her? She thought."Mia, I can't hold back, do you want me to bless you properly or not?""Yes Reverend Simon, I want you to purify me! I need you to fuck me!"Mia wrapped her leg around him, opening up for his cock. He rubbed the head of it on her clit. Reverend Morris was out of control now and she let him take her how he wanted. He entered her and pounded her hard on the vestry's small wooden table.Mia rode his cock and enjoyed his thrusts, but, as good as it felt, the vicar wasn't satisfying her in the way Gordon had done.How can this be? She thought, as her cousin's husband continued thrusting fast and hard into her, grunting as he did so.It must be because he's just not old enough for me, she mused. After all, he's only forty! Still, I've achieved what I wanted to do. I wanted to experience sex with a vicar, and a married one at that. And I've finally got my own back on Jenna after all these years,"Oh Mia I'm cumming!" Reverend Morris slammed into her for one last time and shot his load deep inside her."Well,” Reverend Morris said, after he'd got his breath back. "I hope you enjoyed that Mia. I certainly did, I can't believe I did that."Mia was about to say something, but at that moment, the vestry door opened and Jenna appeared.For a few moments there was nothing but stunned silence."Mia, why? Why Simon?""Now we're even, Jen," Mia said with a wink."Even?""Remember all those years ago when we were at primary school and I was in love with that older boy, Darren Grimshaw?""Er, what?""You knew how much I fancied him.""Mia, you were only ten at the time. You had a bit of an innocent crush.""Well at the time it felt like true love. And you had to muscle in and ruin it. He took you out to Burger King instead of asking me. I was so upset at the time. I vowed that one day, I'd get my own back!""Uh, yeah. I do remember you saying that, now I recall. So, this is your idea of getting your own back, is it? Seducing my husband, in his church?""Jen, you can't really complain. You've seduced half the men of this church!"Reverend Morris looked sheepishly at them both. "Look, I didn't say anything, she overheard us talking!"Jenna took a deep breath. "You're right, Mia. Guess I'm nothing but a hypocrite there. But where do we go from here?"Mia turned to Reverend Morris. "I've seen the light. And had a revelation. And the truth is, vicars just don't float my boat after all. No offence, Reverend Simon. You were really great. But, you're too young for me. Give me a gorgeous older organist any day! I've already found my perfect man and his name is Gordon!""Lucky Gordon," Jenna said at last."Jen, I want you to promise me one thing. I'll never lay a finger on your vicar again, if you'll promise not to get it on with Gordon again."Jenna's face suddenly fell. "What?"Reverend Morris nodded. "Fair's fair, Jen. And you don't need any more organ lessons - you can play the organ perfectly fine now."Jenna thought for a moment, remembering all the fun times she'd had with Gordon - they'd engaged in some fantastic sex over the past year, and at Easter, she'd got the impression his feelings were becoming stronger than just mere lust."Okay, I promise.""Make it a proper promise. We're in church, remember?""In the name of God, I promise," Jenna said."That's better.""Right, now that we've got that out of the way, how about we all go and have some lunch?" Reverend Morris said, fastening his trousers and belt. "I've worked up quite an appetite!"Jenna shook her head as she watched Mia head down the church aisle in front of them."Is she seriously going to ask Gordon to be her boyfriend? He's so much older than her.""Just like I am to you," Reverend Morris replied."Yes but it's double the age gap that we have. What if Mia wants kids ten years from now? Gordon will be in his mid-sixties! He doesn't have any kids of his own. Can you see him being a dad?""I think he'd be a great dad. You're assuming Mia will want to be a mum. Lots of women choose not to have children these days.""Guess you're right.""Isn't it great, all the people of our church and nearby churches have met someone? I've got you, Josh has hooked up with Yulia. Father Aiden has Róisín. Norman's moved in with Gladys, now there's an odd couple, but they're happy! My ex-wife Lucy married Debbie. Gordon's got your cousin, before you arrived, all these people were unhappy. I'd say your work is done, my love!"They walked down the aisle, hand in hand.Privately, however, Jenna smirked to herself."My work isn't fully done. At least I still have Bishop George, Gordon's cousin Barry, Mayor Buckingham and a few other chaps!"By Blacksheep, for Literotica.

Episode 14. That's Why I Love You with special guest CJ Chilvers, author of The Van Halen Encyclopedia. Yep, Scotzo, Chaz, and Wolfie have delivered a bonus episode that cleans things up by serving up the scraps. This is a track left on the cutting room floor in favor of Josephina. Was that a good decision? Was there more to it? A robust discussion, a "lost" Mitch Malloy take, and CJ's discussion with Mitch about the same, and a world exclusive debut of How Many Say Why. Remember, Van Halen III Redux is the work of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Seaside Pod Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tom Petty Project⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ultimate Catalog Clash⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcast host Kevin Brown and producer Scott D. Monroe, our own Scotzo. Listen to their ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Redux version of VHIII⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ that's lighter, leaner, and in some circles a means to salvaging the disc a producer in a different circumstance might have produced. Ahem. Season 3 of the Regarding...Series - Welcome to the ultimate rediscovery of Van Halen's most controversial album.  At the outset, we represent a good spectrum of views: Wolfie is 100% no opinion on the album; Scott leans more positive but is in the middle and has some dislikes; and Chaz is … appreciative as a student of Edward Van Halen, and empathetic to his artistic cause, but not a big fan of the final output overall. To put it mildly. How Many Say Why is all they could be heard muttering to themselves, in a sea-shanty sort of sway. How Many Say Why? How Many Say Why? Proudly sponsored by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcastle.ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠fourstringmedia⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, not by Romney's Everest Kendal Mints or Buffalo Chicken Wings in general.

Series: Signs & GloryTitle: "How can I be born again?"Scripture: John 3:16-21John 1:11-13Numbers 21:4-9Bottom line: Every person can be born again (from above), enter the kingdom of God, and receive eternal life by looking to Jesus on the pole (cross) and believing that God loves them that much.INTRODUCTIONCONTEXTSERMON OUTLINECONCLUSIONNOTESOUTLINESQUESTIONS TO CONSIDER DISCUSSION QUESTIONSMAIN REFERENCES USEDMy opening prayer: Lord God, help us grow to be and do like Jesus, while abiding in him and leading others to do the same. INTRODUCTIONIt's really important to read scripture in multiple translations so let me give you a different translation to hear this verse in today:Ahoy, mateys! Let me spin ye a tale from the good book, as only Cap'n Jack Sparrow could tell it. Ahem..."Fer God so loved the scallywags of the world, that he gave his one and only son, that whoever swigs a bottle o' rum with him shall not be keelhauled, but have a bounce life that never runs aground, savvy?"CONTEXT"Whereas the emphasis in 3:1-8 was on the necessity of spiritual rebirth, the focus in 3:12-18 is on believing; thus, the themes of divine sovereignty and human responsibility are balanced. (Ridderbos 1997)" via Köstenberger, emphasis mineNote: In my opinion, this quote would be more accurate if he said either "spiritual birth" or "rebirth" but "spiritual rebirth" is not accurate."Because John 3:16 is sandwiched between vv. 14-15 and v. 17, the fact that God gave his one and only Son is tied both to the Son's incarnation(v. 17) and to his death (vv. 14-15). That is the immediate result of the love of God for the world: the mission of the Son. His ultimate purpose is the salvation of those in the world who believe in him...Whoever believes in him experiences new birth (3:3, 5), has eternal life (3:15, 16), is saved (3:17); the alternative is to perish (cf. also 10:28), to lose one's life (12:25), to be doomed to destruction (17:12, cognate with 'to perish'). There is no third option." -CarsonSERMON Every person can be born again, enter into the kingdom of God, and receive eternal life by looking to the cross of Christ and believing that God loves them that much.Why? For God so loved the world that he...GAVE "Gave his one and only son." God gave (sent in v. 17) his son in the flesh (at his birth) to show and tell us the way to true life. Love sent his son down to shine brightly as "The light of the world" so that our evil deeds could be revealed and turned away from.To SAVE "...to save the world through (Jesus)." God gave (sent in v. 17) his son up to be crucified for love. "But God demonstrates his love in this, that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8To save us from eternal condemnation unto new life in his kingdom.How? God births us from above, bringing us to eternal life in his kingdom when weBELIEVE by looking to the cross of Jesus, that God loved us that much, so that we can LIVE forever with him. We receive abundant, eternal life by trusting his words on being born again. CONCLUSIONA Native American tribal chief was well-known throughout his region for being upright and courageous. To establish justice, he set up a punishment system for crimes.Even after the chief had begun to enforce his stringent policies, thievery was a serious problem. Enraged by the blatant law breaking, he increased the punishment for theft to a severe beating. Not long after he issued this decree, a thief was caught. To the chief's horror, it was his own mother! He was in a state of turmoil: Would he allow his own mother to be beaten and show himself to be unloving, or would he cancel her punishment and show himself to be unjust?His tribe began to wager, some thinking he would be cruel, others that he would be lenient. Finally the time arrived for the punishment to be given. To the shock of everyone, the chief had his mother tied to the post. Surely the woman would die! But just before the first crack of the whip by the ready warrior, the chief called for a halt. He stepped up, wrapped his arms around his mother's small frame, and took the beating himself.This story shows how God is both just and loving.Bottom line: Every person can be born again (from above), enter the kingdom of God, and receive eternal life by looking to the pole (cross) and believing that God loves them that much.The message of the Bible is a simple message about God's love and mercy, about man's sin and need, and about the rescue that's found in Jesus Christ. In simple words Sally Lloyd-Jones captures the love of God demonstrated in the death of his Son:"So you're a king, are you?" the Roman soldiers jeered. "Then you'll need a crown and a robe."They gave Jesus a crown made out of thorns. And put a purple robe on Him. And pretended to bow down to Him."Your Majesty!" they said.Then they whipped Him. And spat on Him. They didn't understand that this was the Prince of Life, the King of heaven and earth, who had come to rescue them.The soldiers made him a sign-"Our King" and nailed itto a wooden cross.They walked up a hill outside the city. Jesus carried the cross on His back. Jesus had never done anything wrong. But they were going to kill Him the way criminals were killed.They nailed Jesus to the cross."Father, forgive them," Jesus gasped. "They don'tunderstand what they're doing.""You say you've come to rescue us!" people shouted. "Butyou can't even rescue yourself!"But they were wrong. Jesus could have rescued Himself. A legion of angels would have flown to His side-if He'd called."If you were really the Son of God, you could just climbdown off that cross!" they saidAnd of course they were right. Jesus could have just climbed down. Actually, He could have just said a word and made it all stop. Like when He healed that little girl. And stilled the storm. And fed five thousand people.But Jesus stayed.You see, they didn't understand. It wasn't the nails that kept Jesus there. It was love. (The Jesus Storybook Bible by Saliy Lloyd-Jones, 302-6)What about you?Peter puts it all in perspective in his first sermon:““Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Messiah.” When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?” Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”” ‭‭Acts‬ ‭2‬:‭36‬-‭39‬ ‭NIV‬‬InvitationHow do we respond? Answer 2 questions:Take out a card or piece of paper right now. Write down the answer to these questions: What is God saying to me right now?What am I going to do about it? Write this down on a sheet of paper. What I hear you saying, Lord, is ___________________.[my name] is going to believe/do __________________________________________________ as a result.Finally, share this with your Home or Mission group this week when you gather as a testimony about what God is doing in your life. You don't have to get too specific to give him praise.Lord's Supper, 1 Cor 11:23-26 is good passage.Also, say something like, "Christ has died, Christ is risen, Christ will come again." (past, present, and future)PrayNOTESIn a gallery where artistic masterpieces are on display, it is not the masterpieces but the visitors that are on trial. The works which they view are not there to abide their question, but they reveal their own taste (or lack of it) by their reactions to what they see.The pop-star who was reported some years ago to have dismissed the Mona Lisa as 'a load of rubbish' (except that he used a less polite word than 'rubbish') did not tell us anything about the Mona Lisa; he told us much about himself. What is true in the aesthetic realm is equally true in the spiritual realm. The man who depreciates Christ, or thinks him unworthy of his allegiance, passes judgment on himself, not on Christ.FF Bruce, p. 91The motions to teach/remember John 3:16 "Have you heard about the man who sent a letter to twenty-five men in his town? It said: "All has been exposed. Flee at once." In response, all twenty-five men left town. What would you do if you got a letter like that? Even as Christians, we still feel that tug at our heart that causes us to look for a place to hide in the darkness rather than seeking the light of Christ." RC Sproul OUTLINESWillmington's OUTLINE Bible (JOHN 3):Jesus meets with Nicodemus and tells him in order to be saved, all people must be born again. John the Baptist tells his disciples that Jesus is the Messiah.1. JESUS EXPLAINS THE PLAN OF SALVATION (3:1-21): A man named Nicodemus visits Jesus by night.LAST WEEKA. The credentials of Nicodemus (3:1): He is both a member of the Jewish Sanhedrin and a Pharisee.B. The confession of Nicodemus (3:2): He acknowledges that Jesus is from God because of his miracles.C. The command to Nicodemus (3:3): Jesus says he needs the new birth.D. The confusion of Nicodemus (3:4): He confuses spiritual birth with physical birth.E. The chastening of Nicodemus (3:9-13): Jesus chides him for not knowing these things even though he is a respected Jewish teacher.F. The clarification for Nicodemus (3:5-8, 14-15): Jesus employs three illustrations to explain the new birth to Nicodemus. (Cf. Ezekiel 36:25-28)THIS WEEKG. The conclusion for Nicodemus (3:16-21): Jesus now summarizes both the subjects of salvation and condemnation!1. The persons (3:16)a. The Father gave his Son (3:16a).b. The Son will give his life (3:16b).QUESTIONS TO CONSIDERWhat do I want them to know? Why do I want them to know it?What do I want them to do?Why do I want them to do it?How do they do this?DISCUSSION QUESTIONSDiscovery Bible Study process: https://www.dbsguide.org/Read the passage together.Retell the story in your own words.Discovery the storyWhat does this story tell me about God?What does this story tell me about people?If this is really true, what should I do?What is God saying to you right now? (Write this down)What are you going to do about it? (Write this down)Who am I going to tell about this?Find our sermons, podcasts, discussion questions and notes at https://www.gracetoday.net/podcastAlternate Discussion Questions (by Jeff Vanderstelt): Based on this passage:Who is God?What has he done/is he doing/is he going to do?Who am I? (In light of 1 & 2)What do I do? (In light of who I am)How do I do it?Final Questions (Write this down)What is God saying to you right now? What are you going to do about it?MAIN REFERENCES USED“John,” by R. Kent Hughes, Preaching the Word Commentary, Edited by Kent HughesExalting Jesus in John, by Matt Carter & Josh WredbergThe Gospels & Epistles of John, FF BruceJohn, RC SproulJohn, KöstenbergerThe Gospel According to John, DA CarsonThe Light Has Come, Leslie NewbiginThe Visual Word, Patrick Schreiner“Look at the Book” by John Piper (LATB)“The Bible Knowledge Commentary” by Walvoord, Zuck (BKC)“The Bible Exposition Commentary” by Warren Wiersbe (BEC)Outline Bible, D Willmington (OB)NIV Study Bible (NIVSB) https://www.biblica.com/resources/scholar-notes/niv-study-bible/Chronological Life Application Study Bible (NLT)ESV Study Bible (ESVSB) https://www.esv.orgThe Bible Project https://bibleproject.comNicky Gumbel bible reading plan app or via YouVersionClaude.aiChatGPT Google Gemini

How has it taken us ten years to get around to covering a Sokpop game? The venerable but very weird indie collective has put out a fascinating perfectly normal gardening game.  Ahem. OK fine, Grunn is a...

Star Trek: Voyager, Series 2, Episode 11. First broadcast on Monday 20 November 1995. And Seska is back! Everyone's favourite Bajoran Maquis Cardassian traitress returns — with a daring plan to unite the Kazon sects, or to destroy Voyager, or to capture Chakotay and collect a couple of teaspoonfuls of his DNA. Ahem. Anyway, at least Joe and Nathan get the chance to reminisce about a version of the show that they enjoyed and that gave the cast plenty of fun stuff to do.

It's been fifteen YEARS of podcasting at The Professional Left! Our hearts go out to the victims of the Palisades fire. Why can't we talk to conservatives not to inform or persuade or even get them to accept reality?  Sad!   A history.  Ahem. More at proleftpod.com.Blue Gal's knitting podcast!  https://www.youtube.com/@flangumOur podcast YouTube Channel:  https://www.youtube.com/@ProfessionalLeftSupport the show:PayPal |  https://paypal.me/proleftpodcastPatreon | https://patreon.com/proleftpodDo you want to send us a Happy New Year card and/or contribution by mail?  We love getting mail!The Professional Left PodcastPO Box 9133 Springfield, IL 62791Support the show

In this episode of Crina and Kirsten Get to Work our hosts consider the silent exclusively female workplace challenge - menopause.  Menopause affects over 1 million women in the U.S. annually. Nearly 20% of all women are grappling with its symptoms right now, often in silence. Hot flashes, brain fog, and fatigue aren't just physical nuisances—they're cultural battlegrounds. Society often wraps a woman's worth in fertility, leaving those navigating menopause potentially battling stigma, shame, and a perceived loss of identity. Unlike aging men hailed as "silver foxes," menopausal women rarely get the same applause. So let's change that narrative. And the workplace is our first stop because, well, it's not such a great place for people experiencing menopause. A Mayo Clinic study revealed menopause costs American women an incredible $1.8 billion annually in lost work time. And we have lots to do with that time, folks!  Fifteen percent of participants reported cutting back hours or missing work due to symptoms, with the worst-affected women 16 times more likely to face “adverse work outcomes.” Disturbingly, over 1% of women quit or were laid off due to debilitating symptoms. Black and Hispanic women often face even harsher impacts, reporting higher rates of symptoms and workplace struggles. In the UK, a similar story unfolds. Nearly half of menopausal women report work-related challenges like low energy, poor concentration, and feelings of isolation. Many fear disclosing their struggles to employers; 47% avoid sharing the real reason for taking sick days. This culture of silence drives one in ten to leave their jobs entirely. So, why does menopause get such a raw deal? Unlike conditions like cardiac disease, menopause doesn't slot neatly into existing workplace health frameworks. The unpredictable, chronic nature of its symptoms demands nuanced solutions—something most workplaces lack. But change is on the horizon. Forward-thinking companies and organizations are beginning to recognize menopause as a workplace issue. From the British Menopause Society to the European Menopause and Andropause Society, folks are advocating for tangible support around menopause: flexible schedules, breathable uniforms, and health plans that cover menopause treatments.  Studies show interventions like yoga, cognitive behavioral therapy, and work-life coaching can make a world of difference. With the right support, menopausal women can thrive—not just survive—in their careers. Let's ditch the stigma, embrace the conversation, and build workplaces where every stage of womanhood is valued. Menopause isn't the end; it's a new chapter, and it's time we wrote it right or maybe write it right?!  You get the point listeners. Study Shows the Staggering Cost of Menopause for Women in the Work Force Impact of Menopause Symptoms on Women in the Workplace;  Without support, many menopausal workers are quitting their jobs;  Menopause in the Workplace - Women's Health Concern

PLAYLIST: Pacific St Blues & AmericanaJanuary 5, 2025Podcasts@Happy New Year ya'll! 1. Little Feat feat Shaun Murphy / Wang Dang Doodle2. Koko Taylor / Little Mixed Up 3. Buddy Guy / Let the Door Knob Hit Ya4. Shemekia Copeland / Blame It On Eve 5. Kyshona feat Keb Mo / Carolina6. Cassandra Wilson / Shelter from the Storm 7. Joan Baez / Diamonds & Rust 8. Johnny Cash & Bob Dylan / North Country Girl 9. Willie Dixon / Back Door Man 10. Ted Hawkins / There Stands a Glass 11. Sunnyland Slim / It's You Baby 12. Blind Willie McTell / Statesboro Blues 13. Ronnie Earl & the Broadcasters / Heart of Glass14. John Mayall & the Bluesbreakers / The Death of J.B. Lenoir15. Rory Gallagher / Tatto'd Lady 16. Warren Zevon / Poor, Poor Pitiful Me17. Waylon Jennings/ It's So Easy18. Roy Orbison / Blue Bayor 19. Chuck Berry / Back in the USA20. The Rolling Stones / Tumblin' Dice21. Linda Ronstadt / Long, Long Time

We are back for our biggest best of list yet. We are talking about our top 25 albums of 2024. We worked to collaborate on a list this year instead of each of us selecting 10 albums and taking turn discussing themJoin our Patreon to get bonus audio, videos, blog posts, and access to our Discord for only $1 at patreon.com/punklottopodJoin our brand new $5 Producer / Listening Club tier where you can get your name said every single week on the podcast as a producer. You also get access to our monthly Listening Club where we get together on Zoom to discuss an album, just like a book club!If you would like to sponsor an episode, head over to patreon.com/punklottopod and sign up for our $10 tier. Make a one time donation and you get and entire episode centered around an album of your choice.Major Awards EP - majorawards.bandcamp.comMerch Shop  - redbubble.com/people/punk-lotto-pod/shopPodcast platforms and social media links at linktr.ee/punklottopodCall our voicemail line: 202-688-PUNKLeave us a review and rating on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.Song clips featured on this episode:Dystopian Dracula by Sonny Falls  Sins at My Back by Totally Slow  Sleep in the Sunroom by Downhaul  Keeper by Dry SocketBrakes by OnsloowGlitter and Spit by No ManThree Diamond Blues by The Big Easy  Ruby Church by XK2 by Liquid MikeBetter Days by Hedge  Deception Island by J RobbinsYour First Rodeo by Jon Snodgrass + BuddiesKeep This to Yourself by What GivesBirthday by Late BloomerStrawberry Moon by Arab StrapFilm Maudit by Restorations909 by Starflyer 59Privacy by Swami and the Bed of NailsEverything Disappears by Extra Arms  Happy New Year by OceanatorLeap Year by AhemAction Painting by PerennialNice Girl by Cowboy BoyGive Me Action by SweatNext Time by Bacchae

I had a AHEM (clears throat) very enlightening experience

It's our fifth year of getting the patrons together and giving thanks for the new music that gave us happiness and good vibes in 2024. There's a wide array of bands and artists, new and old, that helped make 2024 a great year for music. New albums from 1980s, 90s and 00s artists like The Cure, Pearl Jam, Judas Priest, Underworld, The Black Crowes, John Davis (Superdrag), The Sheila Divine, Jack White, Pig, the Pixies, Watershed, Sebastian Bach, Silver Sun, D-A-D, J. Mascis, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, Primal Scream, The Smile, and many more all released great late career records, while newer bands like Return to Dust, Ahem, Friko, The Blackburns, Crows, and several others landed on our radar.   Songs In This Episode Intro - Alone by The Cure (from Songs from a Lost World) 3:38 - Trust In Me by Silver Sun (from Mild Peril) 11:49 - (Hold On) To The Dream by Sebastian Bach (from Child Within The Man) 18:11 - Lapdog by Ahem (from Avoider) 21:34 - Fallout by Pig (from Feast of Agony EP) 31:17 - Free To Fall by John Davis (from JINX) 34:32 - Trial By Fire by Judas Priest (from Invincible Shield) 42:00 - Automaticity by J. Robbins (from Basilisk) 52:01 - Wanting and Waiting by The Black Crowes (from Happiness Bastards) 1:08:41 - The Darkness by The Sheila Divine (from I Am The Darkness. We Are The Light) Outro - Dark Matter by Pearl Jam (from Dark Matter)   Support the podcast, join the DMO UNION at Patreon. Listen to the episode archive at DigMeOutPodcast.com.

GC13, Soren, and David discuss the seventeenth episode of Delicious in Dungeon, Harpy and Chimera. Well, we definitely felt that big fight. First harpies then adventurers dying left and right though, and all anyone can talk about are Falin's huge– Ahem. At least this world has healing magic. And at least Laios was able to … Continue reading

In this episode of The Living Artist, we hold auditions?? Ahem... Stick around to find out. We do for sure however present a special Solosode Mash-Up of two segments from special solo episodes over the years. Listen in to get inspired by different insights and strategies. This one is fun and introspective, with some actionable concepts. Hopefully you will come away inspired and wanting to revisit different episodes of the podcast as well. Enjoy! For more information on Preston M. Smith and his artwork, visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.pmsartwork.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or follow him on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/pmsartwork⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (social media everywhere @pmsartwork). You can also now subscribe to his YouTube channel at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/pmsartwork⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. If you would like to donate to the podcast to keep it going strong, you can do so here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.pmsartwork.com/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ The Living Artist makes the top of the ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Audible Blog's List⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ of the ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Best Art Podcasts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to listen to For Artists! Check it! Thrilled to announce that ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Artwork Archive⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ just included The Living Artist on their list of the ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Best Art Podcasts of 2021⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! Check it out. Excited that ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Agora Group International Fine Art⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ included The Living Artist on its list of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Best Art Podcasts To Listen To⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (coming in at #5). Huge thank you to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Feedspot⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for choosing The Living Artist for their list of the ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Top 70 Art Podcasts You Must Follow in 2023⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. It is a huge honor to have made this amazing list (coming in at #8) with so many other wonderful podcasts. Big thank you to Feedspot! You can check out this list and more of Feedspot at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://blog.feedspot.com/art_podcasts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Podcast theme music: "Music by Jason Shaw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Audionautix.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠"

AHEM? WHERE IS MY SWITCH 2?

Sorry, Maggie Haberman, we're just two married podcasters who live in a little house near a cornfield and who think the Beltway media is waaay too busy patting each other's backs.  We're not an industry, we're pro-journalistic ethics (hello Olivia Nuzzi), political integrity (good bye Mark Robinson), and funding school lunches (Ahem). More at proleftpod.com.Support the show

Thanks Liz and Dick Cheney now GET LOST.  You get NOTHING for doing the right thing.  And you especially don't get more political power because you're pretending to be "centrist."  Have a nice day! Also David Brooks pretends Trump was a "hostile takeover of outsiders" of the lovely kind Republican Party he knew and loved back when Dick Cheney was Vice President.  We remember differently, David. And guess who wrote for the NYFT that tariffs might be what Trump lies say they are.  AHEM.More at proleftpod.comYou can help us pay for DG's eye doctor expenses athttps://www.gofundme.com/f/help-ease-dgs-medical-financial-burdenBlue Gal's knitting podcast!  https://www.youtube.com/@flangumOur podcast YouTube Channel:  https://www.youtube.com/@ProfessionalLeftSupport the show:PayPal |  https://paypal.me/proleftpodcastPatreon | https://patreon.com/proleftpodSupport the show