Podcast appearances and mentions of Edie Falco

Want to watch the video version of this podcast? Check it out on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkLXkS6rfns Our two new books... STORY QUESTIONS: How To Unlock Your Story One Question At A Time - https://payhip.com/b/ZTvq9 and 17 Steps To Writing A Great Main Character - https://payhip.com/b/kCZGd 0:00 - True Story Behind One Of The Biggest Screenplay Sales In History 15:37 - This Is The Story I Tell New Screenwriters 26:32 - What I Finally Understand About The Screenwriting Business 20 Years Later 36:44 - Why The Logline Is The Most Important Part Of The Screenwriting Process 47:37 - Difference Between A Hollywood Movie Idea And One That Isn't Good Enough 58:42 - If You Don't Cry While Writing A Screenplay... Throw It Away 1:10:06 - Truth About The First 10 Pages Of A Screenplay 1:19:57 - How A Screenplay Sale Actually Works Mike Thompson is a veteran Hollywood writer/producer, perhaps best known for his feature films, Dragonfly, starring Academy Award-winner, Kevin Costner, and Love Happens, featuring Emmy-winner Jennifer Aniston. He also co-created and was a showrunner of the FOX television series, John Doe, starring Dominic Purcell, and co-wrote and produced the indie horror film, Choose, starring Academy Award-nominee, Bruce Dern. In the documentary realm, he executive produced the multi-award-winning feature, A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar, and appears as himself in the cult classic award-winner, The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters. In addition to his produced credits, he is uniquely distinguished for having written and sold dozens of high-profile spec scripts, pitches and teleplays to nearly every major Hollywood studio, including multiple seven-figure deals and at one point, the “highest-paying scripter deal ever" ~ Variety. He has collaborated on projects involving the likes of Tom Cruise, Denzel Washington, Johnny Depp, George Clooney, Will Smith, Edie Falco, Chris Pine, Michael Keaton, Richard Gere, Academy Award-winning director Robert Zemeckis (Forrest Gump), and presently, blockbuster producer Jerry Bruckheimer (Top Gun: Maverick). Upon graduation from film school at New York University's Tisch School of the Arts, Mike began his career at Paramount Pictures, where he worked as an assistant to Academy Award-winning producer, Scott Rudin (No Country for Old Men), and subsequently for legendary producer, Larry Gordon (Field of Dreams), who set up Mike's very first spec script sale at Walt Disney Studios. Mike lives and works in the mountains outside of his hometown of Seattle. MORE VIDEOS WITH MIKE THOMPSON https://tinyurl.com/5bk7st83 CONNECT WITH MIKE THOMPSON https://themissilesite.com https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0860513

In this episode of Normal World, Dave Landau, 1/4 Black Garrett, and Angela unpack Rosie O'Donnell's friendship with Lyle Menendez. They explore why women romanticize killers like the Menendez brothers, then shift to Breaking Bad, Skylar White, mob wife loyalty, and whether The Sopranos had any “good guys.” Mickey recalls hosting Catherine Narducci on Slick and Thick, and the crew critiques El Camino, The Many Saints of Newark, and streaming trends while praising Edie Falco, Drea de Matteo, and forgotten HBO classics like Rome. Virginia Giuffre's suspicious death reignites frustration over Epstein's client list and media silence. From there, the conversation dives into Hollywood's long, disturbing history of underage exploitation—naming names, connecting patterns, and asking why some are canceled while others are protected.This episode of Normal World features guest Gerard Michaels.SponsorsBlue ChewMake life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://bluechew.com/! And we've got a special deal for our listeners: Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code NORMAL!Lean If you're struggling to lose weight and healthy diet and exercise isn't enough -- LEAN is for you. JUST USE CODE NORMAL20 AT www.takelean.com! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In What I've Been Watching, I chat about the 2018 Jon Hamm, Catherine Keener release "Nostalgia," which I found available for viewing at the Uintah County Library in Vernal, UT. Great space, and very cool show!   Hi! My name is Terry J. Aman, marking my 101st episode of VideoFuzzy, reporting the progress I've made in cataloging thousands of VHS transfers and digital recordings. First, heading toward my eighth anniversary doing this podcast, I'm trying to build some engagement. I posted an 11th installment of "VideoFuzzy: The Video - Celebrating 100 Episodes!" at https://youtu.be/eWfcCDiOZ2I. Please share as you're able to with anyone you feel might enjoy this production. Also, most of my recent episodes have posted with promos, so those are also available to share freely. And you have to scroll all the way down, but there are more general promos posted at https://videofuzzy.libsyn.com. Enjoy! This set covers discs 1801 to 1825 in my Classic Collection. For my Fuzzy Feature, from Disc 1818 I pulled up the "Parks and Recreation" second season episode "94 Meetings," and traced Cross Connections for Dan Butler, Jane McGregor, Robert Englund, Timothy Olyphant, Zeljko Ivanek, Robert Picardo, Tony Hale, John Barrowman, Diane Farr, Stephen Weber, Larry Widmore, Ted Bagley, Julie Benz, Krinstin Chenowith, Martha Plimpton, Yeardley Smith and Alex Kingston, plus from "Eli Stone" and elsewhere, I celebrate Golden Thread Loretta Devine. In my Classic Collection, I call up my 2010 "TV is the New Reading" podcast commentary on "Happy Town." David Tennant and Patrick Stewart shared the stage in a PBS "Great Performances" production of "Hamlet." Plus comments on "Doctor Who," "Fringe," "The Crying Game" from 1992, and I highlighted insights by fellow podcaster Terry Geo's "Refracted World" at Refracted World "Love is Love Legally" at https://bit.ly/3RoEg0L. Also, "Damages," "Mercy," "South Park," "The Office," "Community," "The Simpsons," OKGO on "The Colbert Report," "Minnesota Original" and on "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," Jon hilariously simulated capping the BP oil spill. In What I've Been Watching, comments on the pilot episode of "Continuum," plus "Captain America: Brave New World," Trey Parker's "Orgazmo," the 2003 Edie Falco pilot of "Fargo," you can find a copy of that posted here: https://bit.ly/4jdNPMb. Also, Jon Hamm and Catherine Keener in the 2018 production of "Nostalgia," and the six-episode 2023 Netflix production of "Queen Charlotte." Happy viewing! TOP FIFTEEN: Here's a "Top Fifteen" episode guide for people looking for a quick read-in on this blog and podcast effort: https://videofuzzy.libsyn.com/about. Enjoy! 

Join Big Vito LoGrasso and Duke Loves Rasslin' as they trade wrestling rings for onion rings and delve deep into the complex world of Carmela Soprano from HBO's "The Sopranos." This week, we're not talking suplexes and steel chairs, but the subtle power plays, the Catholic guilt, and the designer handbags that define the iconic character portrayed by Edie Falco.The Balancing Act: We dissect Carmela's struggle to maintain a semblance of normalcy amidst the chaos of mob life. How does she navigate the moral gray areas, and what are the consequences?The Material Girl: From the lavish lifestyle to the underlying dissatisfaction, we explore Carmela's relationship with wealth and status, and how it impacts her decisions.The Faith Factor: We examine the role of Catholicism in Carmela's life, and how her guilt and spiritual struggles shape her interactions with Tony and the rest of the Soprano family.The Mother and Wife: We discuss Carmela's complex roles as a mother to Meadow and AJ, and her tumultuous marriage to Tony, analyzing her moments of strength and vulnerability.Edie Falco's Tour de Force: We celebrate Edie Falco's Emmy-winning performance, highlighting the nuances and depth she brought to the character.Behind the Scenes: We discuss some behind the scenes aspects of the show, and how the character of Carmela was developed.Tune in for a gabagool-fueled discussion that goes beyond the surface, uncovering the layers of one of television's most fascinating characters.#TheSopranos #CarmelaSoprano #HBO #BigVito #DukeLovesRasslin #FriendOfOursPodcast #TVAnalysis #CharacterStudy #MobLife #EdieFalco #TelevisionHistory #PodcastLife #Gabagool #SopranosFamily #TVShowDeepDive**Want to buy Vito a Coffee? Visit www.buymeacoffee.com/thedonofwrestling & show you're a true "Friend Of Ours". ****All views expressed on Duke Loves Rasslin are that of whomever is expressing them. If you like it great. If you don't like it, great! #PullUpYourSkinnyJeans ****Theme music created with AI assistance**

Lisa Kudrow, Edie Falco, and Parker Posey all in the same horror comedy? Yes, yes, and hell yes! Tune in to hear us break down “The Parenting” (now streaming on Max) — from all the crude jokes that Matt (obviously) loved, to whether there was enough balance between the funny and the scary, and how a text message with the

Invite your parents (demon or not) over for our review of 'The Parenting'! On the menu: Edie Falco & Lisa Kudrow steal the show, Parker Posey being Parker Posey, fart jokes, camp queer comedies, and more!INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/abiteofpod/THREADS: https://www.threads.net/@abiteofpodBLUESKY: https://bsky.app/profile/abiteofpodcast.bsky.socialTWITTER: https://twitter.com/ABiteOfPodDISCORD: https://discord.com/invitePATREON: https://www.patreon.com/join/abiteofpod(01:18) - Initial Thoughts (04:35) - Queer Movies & A Stacked Casts(08:57) - Did The Horror Work?(11:42) - Did The Rom-Com Work?(15:30) - Too Campy? Not Enough Camp?(22:23) - Final ThoughtsFor business inquiries please contact abiteofpod@gmail.com'The Parenting' directed by Craig Johnson and written by Kent Sublette.Starring Nik Dodani, Brandon Flynn, Brian Cox, Edie Falco, Lisa Kudrow, Dean Norris, Vivian Bang, and Parker Posey.

The dynamic duo "Patty and Patty" have been a hit for years. Join us for a lively exploration of Italian American culture and heritage. Their creative journey from a one-act play to a global sensation provides a fascinating look at the power of storytelling and social media. With fans spanning from Tasmania to Moldova, Patty and Patty's work is a testament to the enduring bonds and rich histories that connect Italian communities worldwide. We share laughter and insights as we uncover family immigration stories and the evolution of entertainment from classic TV to today's digital landscape. Our discussion veers into the heart of Italian American food traditions, weaving through the family kitchens of Abruzzo, Bari, and Sanza. Patty and Patty invite us to savor the flavors of homemade pasta and unique pesto recipes, all while echoing the philosophy of minimizing waste. The episode captures the nostalgia of shared family meals and holiday gatherings, emphasizing the importance of keeping these traditions alive in an ever-changing world. From cherished childhood recipes to modern culinary twists, we celebrate the profound impact of food on our cultural identity. As the conversation unfolds, the richness of Italian American theater and acting takes center stage. With anecdotes of navigating Italian and Jewish roles in media, Patty and Patty shed light on the complexities of representation and authenticity. From the iconic performances of Edie Falco in "The Sopranos" to tales of performing improv in New York's storied venues, we explore the vibrant tapestry of Italian American storytelling. The episode concludes with a heartfelt reflection on the power of narrative to preserve heritage, leaving listeners inspired to embrace their cultural roots with a catchy tune echoing in their minds. THEIR SOCIALS Instagram: @pattyandpattynyc Tiktok: @pattyandpatty Youtube:  @Pattyandpatty  Facebook: Patty and Patty Website: https://www.pattyandpatty.com/

(00:08-20:19) Larry Nickel joins us to recap WWE's Netflix debut. Larry was shocked by Hulk Hogan's booing. Can you curse on the program now? Are we still in a break? Bradford Doolittle's franchise temperatures. Dodgers are boiling hot. Freezing in Pittsburgh. Nick and Drew Lachey. Janet calls in with a temperature check. Janet wants some action on the bases. Not on board with Tiny Pee Pee. (20:28-39:55) Janet has overwhelmingly won over the listening audience. Thirst for bobbleheads. White Supremacist Top Man. Audio of Edie Falco talking behind the scenes of The Sopranos. Don't wanna overextend myself with television. Finality is ok. Watching Caddyshack with the kids.(40:05-47:03) No one seems to know when sports wagering will be legal in Missouri. (47:11-59:50) Things moving slow out on Olive. Jason Kelce's Late Night show debut and did not necessarily perform well. Huge numbers for the Vikings Lions game on Sunday night. Ohio State/Notre Dame collision course? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

(00:08-20:19) Larry Nickel joins us to recap WWE's Netflix debut. Larry was shocked by Hulk Hogan's booing. Can you curse on the program now? Are we still in a break? Bradford Doolittle's franchise temperatures. Dodgers are boiling hot. Freezing in Pittsburgh. Nick and Drew Lachey. Janet calls in with a temperature check. Janet wants some action on the bases. Not on board with Tiny Pee Pee. (20:28-39:55) Janet has overwhelmingly won over the listening audience. Thirst for bobbleheads. White Supremacist Top Man. Audio of Edie Falco talking behind the scenes of The Sopranos. Don't wanna overextend myself with television. Finality is ok. Watching Caddyshack with the kids. (40:05-47:03) No one seems to know when sports wagering will be legal in Missouri. (47:11-59:50) Things moving slow out on Olive. Jason Kelce's Late Night show debut and did not necessarily perform well. Huge numbers for the Vikings Lions game on Sunday night. Ohio State/Notre Dame collision course? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

ROSS MEYERSON is best known for his work as an award-winning television and film casting director. He won an Emmy for his work on ‘Damages' in 2007 as well as having received seven additional nominations. The short film “Red, White and Blue” his last casting project has been nominated for a 2024 Oscar. He has been nominated sixteen times for CSA's prestigious Artios Award and was fortunate enough to have won twice for ‘Homeland' and ‘Rescue Me'. Other notable shows Ross has cast include ‘The Affair', ‘The Americans'. ‘Nurse Jackie', ‘'Dexter : New Blood', “The Equalizer', ‘The Expanse', 'The Big C', ‘The Following', ‘Seven Seconds', ‘Hunters', ‘In Treatment', ‘Sneaky Pete', ‘True Blood'(pilot) and many others. The list of showrunners, writers and directors he has had the privilege of working with include Alan Ball, David Milch, Denis Leary, Peter Tolan, Paul Feig, Kevin Williamson, Joel Fields, Joe Weisberg, Brett Ratner, Bryan Cranston, George Nolfi, Dan Futterman, Clyde Phillips, Sarah Treem and Veena Sud.  In addition to his work as a casting director Ross has also works producing and developing new works for the screen and stage. He recently produced ‘I'll Be Right There' starring Edie Falco, Bradley Whitford, Michael Rapaport, Charlie Tahan, Michael Beach, Jeanie Berlin and Sepideh Moafi . ‘I'll Be Right There” was selected in the Hampton, Newport, Santa Barbara and Jackson Hole Film Festivals. He will begin shooting his next film, ‘The Yeti” in late January. His next project in development is the feature film ‘Juliet' written by Jen Richards and recently chosen for the GLAAD list and The Black List.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On today's episode of The Roommates Show we welcome Edie Falco or you may know her as Mrs. Soprano. Together they talk about how Josh has never seen The Sopranos, Jalen holding a grudge against Joel Embiid & what is was like auditioning for Carmela Soprano.Whatever the moment, it's never ordinary at bet365. Download today and use code ROOMMATESNew Merch Collection Now LIVE: http://roommatesmerch.comDownload the Gametime app today or http://Gametime.co for $20 off your first order with code ROOMIESChase cardholders can score more - Headed to MSG? Visit http://Chase.com/MSG to learn more. Terms apply.Sun Cruiser. Crack one open today and let the good times cruise. Must be 21+ to enjoy. Please drink responsibly.Big news. Real ones can now subscribe to our FanFix channel to access exclusive weekly content that you won't find anywhere else! Subscribers will also get early access to new merch, tickets, and more. See you there. https://app.fanfix.io/@roommatesshowTT: https://www.tiktok.com/@roommatesshowIG: https://www.instagram.com/theroommatesshowX/TW: https://twitter.com/roommates__showTimestamps:00:00 - 01:24 - Intro01:24 - 02:06 - Getting love from Knicks fans02:06 - 02:45 - Josh has never seen The Sopranos02:45 - 05:51 - Family experiences05:51 - 08:58 - Edie Falco on TV Shows08:58 - 10:56 - Bet365 Segment10:56 - 13:21 - Playing on Christmas13:21 - 16:13 - Edie's Knicks Fandom16:13 - 19:18 - Knowing your team19:18 - 22:14 - Acting Routine22:14 - 26:18 - Suncruiser Segment26:18 - 27:36 - TV Contracts27:36 - 29:09 - Early days of The Sopranos29:09 - 31:19 - Auditioning for Carmela Soprano31:19 - 33:22 - Great roles on TV33:22 - 38:11 - Breaking Typecasting38:11 - 39:39 - TV Making now and Then39:39 - 41:11 - Gametime ad41:11 - 41:33 - Chase ad41:33 - 52:34 - How do bets affects the sport?52:34 - 56:41 - Maintaining the Integrity of Sports56:41 - 57:44 - SMU Study on sports betting57:44 - 59:20 - Josh on his past parlay process59:20 - 1:05:08 - Holding Grudges1:05:08 - 1:09:59 - Perspectives of a trade1:09:59 - 1:11:12 - "Josh Hart Triple-Double!"1:11:12 - 1:13:48 - Fan Questions1:13:48 - 1:14:42 - Outro + Fanfix AdGAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL OR TEXT 1-800-GAMBLER (AZ, CO, IN, KY, LA, NC, NJ, OH, PA, VA) or 1-800-BETS OFF (IA). 21+ only (18+ in KY). Must be present in AZ/CO/IA/IN/KY/LA (select parishes)/NC/NJ/OH/PA/VA. T&C's apply.

Why didn't you just get out when you could? When could I just ever ‘get out'?? You're probably right. More than probably. I could feel my abdomen creeping up my sides–I was heavier than normal, but mostly all new, lean muscle–the long hours on the cycle bike were making my core a strange and hard, sturdy plank under the soft skin on my tummy, a smooth and comfy and warm, plush layer of autumn coconut oil and sweet potatoes resting on my midriff and thick thighs– I would be the best to hug and cuddle, but since there was no one around I would even consider letting close to me, I sometimes hugged and kissed myself instead; sometimes I squeezed in places I knew his hands should be and wished they were, trying not to tear under the weight of being alone. Now i'm in enemy territory. How do you feel? I don't. God's an asshole. This is the bitter end; Recede, retract back down, bow low Keep your head up, And your head down And your mind up Go to bed now. Something's wrong; I know I am. I don't dare talk to God, When The Knicks are on. I don't dare talk to God When her soaps are on. I don't dare talk to God at all; Did you know you had a heart, after all, but a mind made of straw, run along, watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Come on, Come hard Think of dinner afterward and what you want Think of all the words you never lost Think about the soft sprung hard wood floor Think about a love gone wrong And the worlds spun off course Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn, Come on, Come along now Come along Mama Talismans, strange; Follow the secret, Swallow it hard, and don't throw up (even though you want to) Another God, that With just a look, but never touch Pen to pad and now you're on, off again but at least not as far off As you woke up Have a word, God Soft spoken and All out of numbers Ah, come on heart, Don't stop, nah Not now, mom Come on, ma Come on As the tear falls and the clock stuck four minutes after Might as well have been an hour, since the clock struck Stuck on asphalt, all you wanted All the God's gone, Come on, heart, Don't pump so much blood Only salt in those, ah You know there are no other ones What does that cost Nothing. Love just falls out of her. What? Nothing. It does cost afterward, The haunts, And all the moving parts The clock struck hummus, All you wanted, once But so much further off that God shook her head And hung her shoulders, Put the world up, and went down in her cot or coffin For just a half hour nap Before the next world war Alright, God– You won that one. Does it hurt less? Nah, i'm alive more. (before i wasn't) Where the fuck are you going? I WAS LOOKING FOR SUNNI BLU. WELL, DID YOU FIND HIM? NO! THEN WHAT THE FUCK! wait a second…you wrote this. Goddamit, just google me already! you wrote this? I don't know. Lets find out! Sorry, no can do. It's a rule Limited exposure, contain your composure. I can guarantee you, not a single human being on this planet can explain to you what's happening right now. Maintain your composure. SUNNI BLU stumbles over what appears to be a dead body on the floor. Ow. Sorry. I thought you were a speed bump. Is that really how it goes? We'll fix it later, cause here's this one. I'd marry a bunson burner before I'd even think about marrying you. What is that supposed to mean–what? Cause there's more fire– Heat? The bunson burner has more heat? That makes like no sense. Are you saying i'm not hot enough for you? Let's just say… We'd have a lot more chemistry. That's what I said! My punchline was better. I'll show you a punchline. __ You can't keep a secret, can you? …i don't know…why. You look like you can't keep a secret. Try me. –fuck that. Go ahead. Nah, fuck that. Tag, youre it. GodDAMMIT. This is literally the most intricate game of tag, like, ever played. dammit. He got me again. How long have you guys been playing. For ever. Forliterally ever. Like always. MOB GUY Man, i'm so fucked for writing this. Why are you still writing this. The tarot told me to keep writing it; And the Tarot doesn't lie: especially about MOB GUY (CONT'D) Jimmy Fallon, you slimy bastard. “The Good Guy” Am i slimy? I'm probably slimy. Yikes. MAFIA GUY FALLON, you rat-faced lyin' bastard! Ah shit, the Jimmy-isms. I almost forgot about them. (I didn't.) [Unintelligible blabbering in hysterics.] Which one is that?! Doesn't matter. Just get the Jimmy into the elevator before anybody actually sees him. That's it. This dude's got to believe in God, or something. Christ. Yowza. Why do you think that? Nothing else makes sense. Heavy price to pay, don't you think? Whatever, dog. To risk everything–your career, your livelihood–your family– On just one idiot? Sorry. Well, you ought to be. I said i was. Yeah, but somehow, I don't think i believe yas. Are you catholic? On my mudda. Then really, honestly–I don't think you believe in anything. What did you just say to me? (the irony is that this mobster is having a conversation with the living incarnation of Jesus Christ himself.) That is irony, but how is anybody else going to actually understand what's happening in this story. Explain to me why it's Jason Sudakis that remembers everything? I don't know exactly. Because. In all of the timelines, in all of the stories, there's at least one principal character from each group of characters that remembers absolutely everything. {Enter The Multiverse} You still didn't find him? No! It's no use! We've looked everywhere. Seriously. Seriously. Of course– [An exasperated sigh, then a brief pause] Make the feelings go away. ok. What drug is this. All of them. Did you check under the craft services table? What? Seriously just. OH MY GOD. there he is! See. That's easily the third time i've written that part. Easily. It must have been important, but i couldn't help but wonder why; I had written it at least once and then down again in my notebook after visiting 30 Rock to see Seth Meyers, but hadn't ever pondered until now why exactly something such as this might be so important. Perhaps it was the simple hilarity in the fact that, although having been missing for arguably days or weeks on end, that this character–Jimmy Fallon–or whoever it actually was, is simply unconscious beneath the craft services table, out of view but otherwise in plain sight; How coulda 6-foot tall man— He can't be 6 feet tall. Why not. If Post Malone is 6 feet tall, And this is JImmy Fallon sitting next to Post Malone [Jimmy Fallon is sitting next to (or rather, almost under) Post Malone] Are you sure that's The Real Jimmy Fallon? What? How many are there. Well, there's this guy. >< Hello, mrs. wong. Oh, dear God. This is all just for shits and giggles, right? Right. There will be no shitz. And no giggles! [HANZEL becomes the host of The Tonight Show] What parallel is this? I don't know. Wake me up; it must be a nightmare. It was strange to be almost consistently writing comedy and otherwise almost always feeling on the verge of regurgitation ad nauseum, and constant thoughts about slitting my wrists, as if somehow jumping in front of an oncoming train was suddenly out of the question. It wasn't. But i thought more constantly about slitting my wrists, And the worse part of it was, It was actually serious. I started to worry about myself and take long, thoughtless breaks from writing, And speaking, and forging an effort to make the music business work. I stopped caring almost entirely about anything besides taking the minimal effort to exercise and shower, which I knew that in its worst states, depression often enough kept other people from doing. I couldn't stop caring enough not to shower, and though I was eating more than usual, my abdomen was an alarmingly firm plank; it was kind of weird to have a flat stomach, but the exercise bike and occasional run was keeping me average, if anything, by american standards, above average, however one look at Lindsay Lohan sent me backward trying to remember what it was like to be anything close to some kind of woman, or some kind of phenomenon, or some kind of perfectly trained monkey; not that I considered the performer as such, however, dismantling my aversion for the aforementioned sent a striking resemblance to the-1 Stop there. LINDSAY LOHAN FUCK. Are you serious? SUNNI BLU SHH! Why , I want to show you something. LINDSAY LOHAN GODDAMIT! IT ALWAYS CUTS OFD WHEN IT GET TO MY PART! SUNNI BLU SHHHH. OTHRR SUNNÏ BLŪ Shhh, chill. It's our part. LINDSAY LOHAN Where the fuck did you come from? SUNNI BLU II Heaven, baby. What is it. My basement. I–no–Gosh– Step inside. LINDSAY LOHAN Stop fucking around with the Illuminati. SUNNI BLU What does that mean! LINDSAY LOHAN There are literally two of you right now. SUNNI BLU More to love! –at least I was pulling together a decent Trump impersonation from Meyers, and tried not to think too poignantly about the seething hate a woman like Tina Fey might actual harbor for someone like me. What are you, anyway? I's hopin you'd tell meh. {L E G E N D S} He's a psycho. Huh. Jimmy Fallon is a fucking psychopath. You're kidding me. I'm not kidding you. I'm serious. I'm serious. I knew that. This is serious. Why are you meditating? I'm summoning it. What?! Summoning. We are live in like, 5 minutes. Where the fuck is JImmy? Jimmy what? You are all idiots. Summoning it. Quit meditating and get backstage. I'm– –concentrating… [The Festival Project ™ ] More Cream of Wheatn? Yeus. Mor Cream uf Wheatun. Wheeeeeet. CARTMAN. GODDDDDAMMMNIT< WHUT. TELEPLONE. WHUT. TELE– ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT. UHHNNN. Ah. Bones. [Bones Duggar] Fancy seeing you here. …is it? Man, am I still writing The TV People? I guess so. I thought I was getting in trouble for writing anything about— CUT TO: What are you doing? Midget fishing. What?! AGHHHHHH! What in the fuck. I caught one. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. I'm midget fishing. ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Haha: here you go little guy. [he hands the man a lollipop; the man is furious.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. It's your reward! Enjoy. WHAT THE FUCK DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU?! A midget. YOUVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? He pulls the large hook from out of his Jacket. YOU OWE ME; THIS IS A $2,000 SUIT. Two grand—even in that size?! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS! Ah, alright. [he pulls out a $100 bill and hands it to the man.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? {Enter The Multiverse} Catherine enters with the children. KATHERINE Go hug your father. omg was it Catherine or Katherine. I don't know. It's been so long. It's Katie. PATRICK I'm their father; you don't need to tell them to hug me. KATHERINE Sophie wouldn't. If I didn't tell her, she wouldn't do it. Sophie?! Who the fuck is Sophie?! It's two syllables, at least… What was the middle one's name? Not Sophie. Sophie will do for now. I'm still not ready to go all the way back into that hole. [Patricks's middle child hugs him begrudgingly.] I like Edie Falco for the mom. Edie Falco? I love Edie Falco. So we got—Edie Falco, and some dude who looks like Jimmy Fallon. There is no Jimmy Fallon. Some dude who looks like him. Apparently there's only one of those. Whatever. Whatever, indeed. Okay— so CUT TO: INTERVIEWER/REPORTER –And–What is your standing relationship with JImmyFallon ELMO Excuse me? Your relationship with Jimmy Fallon? ELMO What did you just say to me? What? Jimmy Fallon. ELMO This interview is over. [Elmo dismissively exits.] Wait. Elmo. Come back. ELMO No. No more questions. Elmo! ELMOWe're done here. What do you want, Kimmel?! I WANT TO TALK TO GHOSTS. —which ghost do you want? [beat] …which ones you got? [beat] …which ones do you want? I'll make a list. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

SUNNI BLU becomes a man. I guess. Golly. You sure do seem intolerant. Are you sure you don't want a Peloton. I want to live in a white neighborhood And make enough money That my white neighbors Actually respect me For whatever it is I do. Working on a Saturday. Calm down, Jew mom. I will not clam down. In this house, we abide by holy law! Hold on. What happened. I got distracted, this girl looks just like Edie Falco. Oh, I love Edie Falco. Right? I realized how bizarre my creative process really was, in that days I would get the most work done musically, I became physically restful, and complacent, not worrying about the gym so much as the energy I would use rather towards the music I was making, or the over all lacsidasical approach I took to everything. Not being an entirely-perfect stepford- divorcee with a bleach clean everything in my median space, I realized it was almost a more natural kind of creature that created my music; one who ate and acted normally, and was overall less of an anally retentive bitch—not to say that my normal self was not an anally retire bitch, I was, but it was that my creative process seemed to require more normalcy and averageness; eating regularly, What the fuck man. Idk. I got bored The wheels start turning The pages in my mind become phenomenon, I almost bought it I almost bought the dream; Another story arc. Trust, or don't trust? I don't know— these guys are like the ultimate fluffers… MEAT CIRCUS. MEAT CIRCUS. Okay, I love them. …did she light the candle? Oh look, a candle. Hm. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. THEY ADDED GPS TO EDC so then. How many of us are there. Hey. Everybody sit the fuck down, right now. [drones sit down] There she goes. Dammit. Why are you really this short in person? On God, because I'm really this short, irl. Skrillex. NO. Get over here for a second. Wanna go to Disneyland? On my life, I'm like in Cancun right now, but— But what? I'll catch the next flight. “The Uptopia” I thought about finagling a way to get into EDC for like 5 seconds before I remembered what it was, And that i'm a DJ And that it looks cool and all— But sounds, generally like a total nightmare. Not because it wouldn't be fun or anything- a It just wouldn't be fun— —for me. EDC part III Haven't I been to edc more than 3 times already. (Try like 30 times.) —that's enough times. THATS NOT ENOUGH TIMES GIMMIE MY BOX! DID YOU GET THE MAGNET . I GOT THE MAGNET. GET IN THE— Goddamn, dude. That's a lot of magnets. It's really not. Man, what the fuck would even happen if I fuckin actually focused on this project I don't know. I like, haven't focused on this project and it seems like, possibly, maybe I might have brokered some kind of deal that may or may not include Coca Cola and NBC. This dude might be trying to rule the world. All the dudes might be trying to rule the world, I think. Well, what if we put them all in a group together or something —seems—doable And maybe if they're not trying to kill each other, hey the end of of— Oh, look. World peace. Nice. —it. Hm. Let's just say, Altogether I give a total of actually zero fucks— Ah hah And at the end of the day, I just want some dick. How is that going to help achieve world peace, exactly. Fuck around and find out. Ladies. Here, yo. Guy, what's this. A midlife crisis waiting to happen. Oh no. Don't worry, it's almost over. My midlife crisis? No, the part before that. Jellyfishing. I don't know, Patrick, seems like kind of a strange day to go jellyfishing. Just—relax. Jesus Christ. (Soft telephone voice) This is the messiah speaking. Uh…hi. How may I direct your call? Uh… Hello. …is your dad home? Euh…probably not, but I can get you my mom. …that might work. Okay, hold on. (Not telephone voice—actually atrocious Boston accent) MAAAAA. …Jesus Christ. What? TELEPHONE. ring ring. Bitch! Ring ring ring! —bitch! Ring ring ring. —BITCH! Yo! What!! Answer the phone. The phone is ringing! Why do you keep saying “bitch”?! Cause that's a bitch ass telephone, bitch! This is improv! I know! And the first rule of improv is to not saying no, but I refuse to answer a telephone that just says “ring, ring”; that is not a realistic telephone, and so to that, I would just say—“bitch.” Bitch. That is not how improv works. I'ma aim at your head; you technically lost the game already stopping the scene; you said “ring-ring” I said “bitch”; you lost already, I done my part. What? Just—if you're gonna be a phone, be a phone, but don't just say “ring-ring” like that Take me all out of character and shit. What character?! All you said is “bitch!” And all you said was “ring-ring”, hoe—I ain't got time for this— What?! Just be a phone! THAT WAS A PHONE. What phone says ring-ring? Phone ring tone “Ring-ring!” What's that. That's my new ringtone. You're so lame. Well at least we got past the 90's and were clearly into the early two thousands. How do you know? That guy has a ringtone. Who is that guy, anyway—? wait a second! Oh shit. That's him! Get em! Ah, are we bringing back the Italians? I don't think they ever left, they've just been quiet. I want pizza. You're in luck. Goddamn kid! Pizza?! French fries. —I want chocolate cake. AND chocolate cake! Goddamn. You'd better be crafting a goddamn symphony. It's more of like a sonata. “The King Suite” Whatever! Just remember however far you get writing this album is how much more gym time it'll take to be taken seriously promoting it. I'm already promoting it. What, how? LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA DAY. welcome back, kid. Shut up; give me a house. Give me a house song! Okay. OKAY, now downtempo. Downtempo makes me sleepy— but whatever, here. Okay, now techno. Untz-untz—here you are. All it took me was seeing Tiesto's ancient ass plastered all over the place in Brooklyn to realize I don't think it'll ever be “too late” to be a DJ and perhaps I could stand to focus on my other masteries. Whatever. I want chocolate cake . You are gonna get so fat. So? So is she when she pops out three kids— And her music sucks. Sauciness is relative. It sounds like shit in a fucking sandwhich. Just remember tiestos wife is actually like a decade younger than you. Great. I'm looking forward to all my favorite DJ's cradle robbing fashion week for this exact fucking reason. Is that a dig on one of the most legendary dance music DJs of our time? No, it's more of another pondering as to why I wasn't born a 9 foot tall porcelain skin blonde European looking model. I must have done something wrong in a previous existence. Have you tried paddle boarding? That seems /lame Fun! If I start now, maybe by May I can be EDC fit. What's the point of being EDC fit and not going to EDC? Hm. Okay. I can get a peloton, Or EDC tickets— Which should it actually be? What's the point of having a peloton If you're not going to EDC. Correct. But also— Why bother going to EDC at all if you're not going to be mad ripped from riding a peloton all day in your apartment. Also facts. That's what I'm here for Suddenly, I was acting weird. [being weird] Well, weirder than usual. Suddenly, my mind was racing— I was running around my apartment frantically in a halter top that I was certain I looked fabulous in— [looking at least kind of fabulous] — lil bitz. I'm getting to the age where I haven't quite given up, But realizing I'm not going to be the ideal just kind of sits with me in little ways. I haven't let go of myself, I'm not all the way giving up, but I'm more like, settled and secure with myself. A little more self confident in knowing if I wanted just any old dude, I can go out and get one. But I've been saving myself for someone really special. I mean really. And it's been years since I had sex. Actual years, so like— I'm at the point where I can just keep waiting, But sometimes I realize how long it's been, For instance, when I'm shopping, And I'm just kind of, looking around online Figuring out exactly what I want— And I'm scrolling, looking at all the selections And I see this baguette— Like bread, guys. Like a French roll and I think to myself “I'll take that.” I'm getting kind of turned on just looking at it, like Realizing it's bread— I'm like “Ooh, look at this baguette… Oui oui.” lol the fuck is wrong with you. Honestly I'm just looking for vegan chocolate cake without having to make it. Are we a team? …uhhh… kinda depends on who is “we” But since I can hear you faintly in my head, I guess so. Suddenly, I had the feeling that I had written something recently that might at some point become important. Hey. What. I like your five year plan. What fucking five year plan. The one from five years ago. Oh. Wait—what. Let's make it an 8 year plan. You mean 8 years from…from 5 years ago? See, you are good at math. —I—wait, what plan. Okay [chuckles awkwardly] See you later. What. Man, why do like half the characters in this show look and sound like Dillon Francis. Cause they're Dillon Francis. Might as well be. I had also has realized at a certain point recently that I would probably never get married again, and in my own right had set out to be “The Ultimate Lover!” Get out of here, Skrillex. What in the fuck is with that dude. What's wrong with him anyway. Something. Get out. FUCK, HE'S DEAD. Oh well. Not oh well! Someone's definitely gonna be upset about his. Probably! But that's an entirely seperate demographic. We can't be concerned with that. Not our business, The man is dead! You don't know, maybe he's just in A k-hole! [super duper dead] Whatever man. Just— Can you at least give me a hand with his legs. He's heavy. How can he be taller than he looks on TV— Goddamn, he wreaks! He hasn't even been dead long enough for that. I know, he just wreaks, man. Whatever. Look. Just— Ugh— Let's roll him into that tent over there. What. Just roll him in-/ Agh. And hurry up— Virtual Riot is about to start. Goddamn. The wooks. These aren't any ordinary wooks. They're frat boys Oh, that headdress, though. You remember the headdress! I remember the everything, I'm just— trying to forget. Crimes. Or at least—pretending to. You remember David after the dentist? [David after the dentist] AAAAAGAAGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH Well, this is James after The Jam. Mm. What kind Of Jam is this! It's—Jelly. Ah. You're dead. It's—really good. You know what— This is Sauerkraut. Happy accidents is getting weird. Man. I like it. Untz untz untz I just found this out, and I'm over the moon like exactic about this— I just found out you can like, totally buy 5 lbs of marijuana Over the internet. For what? I don't know. Sounds like a deal. Sign me up. Anyway, I found this out— Because I found this bread I like Yes— I know Bread to marijuana We are—making connections— Anyway, I found this bread I like From this one place, And I love this place so much That I begin buying this bread regularly— I love it so much that, I'm looking through all their breads in their bakery and I realize, “Holy shit—they just have the most insane bakery, ever.” Like all the breads are sounding phenomenal— They're real bread— Most bread if it's real bread is vegan, So I'm looking through the bread like, “Holy shit, this all sounds fire—“ And when I like a place a lot— Especially in New York, I get weird about it. Like, I want to know the origins of the place. I love history— History—cannabis—and bread, I know. “Whose the lucky guy?!” lol. Nobody, obviously— if this is my life; but I digress. I'm looking at all these breads, All these artisanal, like— Fresh cakes and, Really unique like, Breads of every kind— And I start thinking to myself “I love this place.” “I love this place” So I start thinking about like the origins of this place— You know like, historically— Like, Sometimes you find cool stuff out about a place Macy's or whatever, Has cool history— Like the oldest surviving wooden escalator Being at the flagship department store in midtown Stuff like that. I love history— So I go to look up this place— I type this place into the search bar with absolutely no other specifications than I think, The name— And the first link that comes up Is a fire sale of 5 pounds of “hemp flower” But from the picture I can see that it's evidently really Complete marijuana— Actual cannabis flower; So I look into this matter, and I investigate this link a little further to figure out— “What is this?” And as it turns out, my suspicions are correct, You can now obtain large quantities of marijuana Via a Google search— By complete accident. I'm like, “Woah!” [Bookmark the page and shit.] “Keep that in there for later…” You know, just in case I ever have $2,200 dollars roughly of disposable income and ever feel like upstarting my very own drug enterprise… Er, restarting— But the drug enterprise I had in college was nothing like this— This is next level. Its the internet age now, buddy! Shit is legitimate. Wait, sorry— is the statute of limitations up yet? Whatever. Leave no trace. There—are bigger fish to fry. lol. Bread, man. I love bread. You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you Doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) Cause it doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you It doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) I'm still in love with you— You know I'm still in love with you. You know what— Huh— Does lemon raspberry sound better or like, This caramel toffee? You know I love a good lemon ice cream— Lemon custard Posh. Ah, the hedons are back. /*herons (You know Insomniac's making their rounds. ) Getdamoney Getdamoney getda— Woah— hold up, what is this I don't know Looks lucrative Facts Hmmm— Worthwhile investment, perhaps Maybe, maybe Very well Getdamoney Getdamoney Getdamoney Take a look at this young buck, they said. So I did. Turns out, the jokes on me. Me, and all my old friends In all my old lives On all my old world Play games In other words, The world goes on, Then off, Then it goes on, We come home— To laugh with one another Me and my friends, We play games Out of body Mind games In the body Play lives, All for entertainment In the old world, We said “One” Off we run, I said So on, comes dawn again We all talk of old reunion. We all talk of— FUCK, man. It's non dairy. I don't give a fuck about your ice cream! We're all on ice cream. I don't give a fuck about ice cream! On, you don't. No! Alright. Done. You know, it's like one door opens— Another door closes; And that's true— But whatever fucking weird drone robots They're probably paying to just come in one door And out the other Are karma cannons— And by that I mean— Whatever's disturbing me; Will eventually disturb them— And maybe, just maybe— In the same annoying way. So one day somebody wakes up and writes an anthology saga about you. It's not about you, it's about me— That's what I said. And that's probably what happened anyway—is what I'm thinking—and either way, I'm just the protagonist of that series, anyway. That's—logical, I'm thinking. I'm also thinking. Man. It feels so good to just sit in silence. Yeah. It does. Didn't you want kids? Whatever. Abusive relationships suck. My version of our kid is hands down way better then your version of our kid. Hands down. Let's get down to the nitti grotti of things here. Nitty Gritty. 11:30. But that's when Tranwrexk is playing. Who the fuck is teaintwrext. No, it's. Whatever. Nitti gritti Okay, so I'm obviously like, not going to forget the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's— But I think maybe even the best part about it was the fact that it was like, a pug. I'm not really ready to go out in public or anything-1 I don't know— I'm like traumatized by the disparity of the human race, or whatever. But shout out to the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's. I don't know what he did. But if you're gonna beat your pug at the Trader Joe's, he probably deserved it. Goddamn you Marc Jacobs! This is what you get for leaving a puddle in produce section! Goddammit! What else are you gonna name a purebred pug that you take everywhere with you— Including Trader Joe's? “This is Marc Jacobs” We thought he was a puggle but it turns out he was a purebreed and we just got so lucky! He gets nervous around people— Sometimes especially at the Trader Joe's He just gets so excited! Bad Marx Jacobs! BAD! On another note why am I just not automatically genetically built like a 6'5 Scandinavian chick. Like, it's cool my legs don't grow any hair at all, but goddamnit I would rather walk fashion week and just— Automatically never be hungry. Imagine giving birth to a supermodel baby and just Here, baby— take this The baby is like: *milks for two seconds* Alright, I'm good. Are you sure, baby. The baby's like “I'm— all full” Are you sure? Baby's like yeah— put me on the treadmill for an hour, would you? I gotta go fast-crawl this all off. Breastmilk, whew. Heavy shit. Just set the incline to all the way up, alright— And make sure I turn up the propane pig to high volume I want to make sure I'm deaf in one ear And only have one brain cell I don't want them to think I talk to much. Mom's like, “Um, okay— are you sure you don't just want like, more breastmilk” Baby's like “No ma, put me on the treadmill and shut the fuck yo you fat cow!” Goddammit, alright. That's— Some kids are just born destined to be— whatever— you know? Me? I was destined to like food, but be pretty much allergic to it— Pretty much allergic to all of it. Not in the typical sense of like having a food allergy— Not getting hives or anything Just— Prone to max weight gain after minimal, regular fucking eating— Minimal fucking eating And maximum effort in the gym just equals More muscle Which, then, The excess fat will just sit on top of Sort of like— Just double fucking bad. It's insane. So that's two waist trainers Correct Two sauna suits Oh my God, what if he's actually 6'3? Who's 6'3?! Getawayfromme. Shoot that nigga. You have a nice double chin. Thanks, I got it myself Liz Nice. Comedy Central presents: roast of the hosts The comics of late night tv roast each other l HOw many jokes do I need? A lot. Let's start with the favorite Favorite? Nah. Jimmy Fallon looks constpated. Every time I see that dude, I'm like— —?! What's wrong with him. Also— Why do you look like the off brand version of Justin long? I smell a conspiracy. And aspercreme. What's up with your cheeks, bro? Are you a hippopotamus? — Jay Leno is like God's version of a live action caricature. _____ Why are you all Irish? ____ Kimmel— what kind of bird are you? —- . —- I've heard exchanging insults is like foreplay for comedians; now I'm genuinely starting to wonder how many of these specials have turned over into orgies. I always had a special feeling about Justin Bieber and Martha Stewart. I'm pretty sure we all did. Mama had a shotgun— And daddy hated broken glass I drink out of broken bottles Clasps slip from the hands That can't Grab Shit you're too fucking tall, anyway. The only person who's actually bigger than they look on TV Fuck that. What are you, 6'10? Stay the fuck over there yeo ming. Who drew you, Disney/Pixar? How do you be in a photo from head to toe; full body in the frame and still not be in the picture? This m'fucker's a ghost. Oh look. It's everyone's favorite blow up doll. WHY DO U LOOK ASIAN? WHO TF DID UR DAD KILL IN NAM? –KOREA? EITHER WAY. YOU'RE ASIAN BRO. You seem like that kid that used to walk up on his tiiiy toes and shit. You're weird, bro. That kid that used to walk up— —like this— That's that guy. Devil can't catch me if I don't sit still Still love Run around the world Ring around the Rosie I'm not broke, I jus got. Photo shoot coming up Hang up yo on the fence, Like paint I dry, Simi dinner hard Try hard see the light, go To the light now Go now, my time has come m Go where, how? It's time now for me to depart, my dear Ishii. Why—how?! Because, my boy—the time has come Time not what is! Time be us, you and I! And as we are, my dear boy. I must go. Time nothing but mind is you and I… You are right. Time — is— time. Ishii begins to cry softly, and then weep. Fair for fair and follow for follow— There not are I, And away we went, With wind and time, And the way was one The inside of a year, As the waking of dawn. At dawn, I strike— But was not called To weep, I wake, the tire of tale And yet the sun was in my heart, Yet not in my mind as the sky, And not in the time as the wind, and still, mi follow to love again I always call, And there, the wind where wind does lie, Not I, awake, but I instead as Sunset Again as time had sat upon my should And like bird does cry, The still be wind has shattered my love And in heart lives in such such dusk As pain, my heart, The wicked beauty, Shadowed and stranded Yet I awaken, And here ye, The vow dost took is not aligned— There I was, the call of once The statuesque and haunting Bleeding dry the river's way And almost as such there though of tears With yet had formed all shallow, and none The call of ways I mask misfortunes, There does bear a truth to the tree which bears fruit And give way to time, I am as oceans, Still as steady water's sky, and come what may Of all we have, There nothing lost, And there were fortunes True to shine as gold, And there in no way, Under us. Wax does melt but has not burned, As shadowtimes had set upon us, There, the call was made, and yes The wind had sat upon the waking dawn of eye And there, again the warrior ready for none other than the song of I, The cry of war, does wait unsettled in her wailing As their call had come As of naught, And then came, As does one. Be fair. Daggers! I rot. “Be fair”, says he. Daggers. I rot! Be fair, says I. Nay, The King. True, tis I. —and daggars! I rot. Wary. I find. So then, To have walked among the living and yet are dead— still you, waiting in quarry, Are now I not as King, As though now dost lie slain. Very. A greeting! Seeing now how such has i, Have passed and still yet waiting in how l My waking This fucker just won't die! Well, he can't. He can! (He should.) He has. Oh. Are you triggered. I knew I just have been getting somewhat important Somewhat. I figured this out when they started having people show up after I get to the gym. I knew they were all the same like people, cause for the the most part, they weren't working out, they would just like, align themselves with me, do a few pumps and then do whatever on their phones This one dude came in, and I was already sick of being followed Hadn't been to the gym in a few days cause these people just fucking bother me. Just fucking blows my mind how stupid people are— And I realized something really wrong with people. Like people are really fucked up inthe head, so, This is what I did, when I realized, they weren't going to stop fucking with me in a certain way, I started fucking with them back. I went upstairs to work out, started doing circuits. Did some pumps up stairs, Run the stairs like laps, Hit the tension machine, Kettlebells, Treadmill, then another circuit— {Enter The Multiverse} And I knew whoever was sending these people We're focused on fucking me up; Cause the people they sent were always like— Some kind of trigger. I knew it was some high level programming; They would send like a pretty girl with long hair To fuck me up Or some fat ugly dude who looked like my ex husband, Fat and shit, And they wouldn't workout much, they would just like, fuck around, then hit the phone— And I realized people were really fucking sick In the head, when I realized, After I psyched the fuck out of this fat dude Just fucking running circles around him and shit, Lifting more than he was struggling to fucking lift This dude is all upper body No fucking cardio No fucking legs Weak dick motherfucker. And I realized how sick people were when he goes up stairs And this is how else I know people are fucking with me They'll always get on the phone, And use their phones as intimidation and shit “Hi, yeah, yeah— I'm checking in. I'm a pussy ass robot and shit. Okay. Bye now. Wait—did you hit my cashapp yet? Okay thanks” How you know it's like an app or some shit. Fucking drones, man. But I could tell they were sick and I was somewhere in my way to wellness when, the dude left, then goes upstairs and gets on the phone, and I'm still downstairs and I'm like “Okay, since they're gonna keep fucking with me—when is the end of this album?” I went to check and I knew the album was an hour long— And I look and the album is on the last track and I thought to myself “I haven't touched my phone in at least an hour…” This dude has been in the gym for half the time and has almost not been off the phone He was on the phone more than working out And that's when I realized, Whether I skip a few days at the gym or not Whether I do what everybody else is doing or not Just that alone is rare. He was in the gym maybe a half hour or less And between every single set, he's on the phone Just like all of the other people who seemed to have been following me— And I realized That maybe they weren't even following me on purpose. Maybe they were being remotely sent in my direction somehow with their phones, without their intention or knowing. That is a possibility— And I knew the world had changed in a way that could possibly become dangerous, after being told for x amount of years we needed a SIM card, I've had my phone for almost 5 years, same model; up until now we “needed” a simcard— Now all of a sudden they're letting us know in one way or another “Hey, no we've always been able to remote control your phone” They've inteoduced the “e sim” which is their subtle way of letting you know They've always been able to turn on your phone signal Without you even knowing. Now they're selling you this technology “Oh, you don't need a sim—e sim” I looked, I didn't think my phone would be clmpatible It's a 5 year old model. “Oh no—it's compatible! Congratulations” Which means even 5 years ago before this technology became consumer, They had the ability to open your phone make calls texts and connect to a network They're just now letting you know This has been around for at least a decade And now they're selling it to you. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

Why didn't you just get out when you could? When could I just ever ‘get out'?? You're probably right. More than probably. I could feel my abdomen creeping up my sides–I was heavier than normal, but mostly all new, lean muscle–the long hours on the cycle bike were making my core a strange and hard, sturdy plank under the soft skin on my tummy, a smooth and comfy and warm, plush layer of autumn coconut oil and sweet potatoes resting on my midriff and thick thighs– I would be the best to hug and cuddle, but since there was no one around I would even consider letting close to me, I sometimes hugged and kissed myself instead; sometimes I squeezed in places I knew his hands should be and wished they were, trying not to tear under the weight of being alone. Now i'm in enemy territory. How do you feel? I don't. God's an asshole. This is the bitter end; Recede, retract back down, bow low Keep your head up, And your head down And your mind up Go to bed now. Something's wrong; I know I am. I don't dare talk to God, When The Knicks are on. I don't dare talk to God When her soaps are on. I don't dare talk to God at all; Did you know you had a heart, after all, but a mind made of straw, run along, watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Come on, Come hard Think of dinner afterward and what you want Think of all the words you never lost Think about the soft sprung hard wood floor Think about a love gone wrong And the worlds spun off course Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn, Come on, Come along now Come along Mama Talismans, strange; Follow the secret, Swallow it hard, and don't throw up (even though you want to) Another God, that With just a look, but never touch Pen to pad and now you're on, off again but at least not as far off As you woke up Have a word, God Soft spoken and All out of numbers Ah, come on heart, Don't stop, nah Not now, mom Come on, ma Come on As the tear falls and the clock stuck four minutes after Might as well have been an hour, since the clock struck Stuck on asphalt, all you wanted All the God's gone, Come on, heart, Don't pump so much blood Only salt in those, ah You know there are no other ones What does that cost Nothing. Love just falls out of her. What? Nothing. It does cost afterward, The haunts, And all the moving parts The clock struck hummus, All you wanted, once But so much further off that God shook her head And hung her shoulders, Put the world up, and went down in her cot or coffin For just a half hour nap Before the next world war Alright, God– You won that one. Does it hurt less? Nah, i'm alive more. (before i wasn't) Where the fuck are you going? I WAS LOOKING FOR SUNNI BLU. WELL, DID YOU FIND HIM? NO! THEN WHAT THE FUCK! wait a second…you wrote this. Goddamit, just google me already! you wrote this? I don't know. Lets find out! Sorry, no can do. It's a rule Limited exposure, contain your composure. I can guarantee you, not a single human being on this planet can explain to you what's happening right now. Maintain your composure. SUNNI BLU stumbles over what appears to be a dead body on the floor. Ow. Sorry. I thought you were a speed bump. Is that really how it goes? We'll fix it later, cause here's this one. I'd marry a bunson burner before I'd even think about marrying you. What is that supposed to mean–what? Cause there's more fire– Heat? The bunson burner has more heat? That makes like no sense. Are you saying i'm not hot enough for you? Let's just say… We'd have a lot more chemistry. That's what I said! My punchline was better. I'll show you a punchline. __ You can't keep a secret, can you? …i don't know…why. You look like you can't keep a secret. Try me. –fuck that. Go ahead. Nah, fuck that. Tag, youre it. GodDAMMIT. This is literally the most intricate game of tag, like, ever played. dammit. He got me again. How long have you guys been playing. For ever. Forliterally ever. Like always. MOB GUY Man, i'm so fucked for writing this. Why are you still writing this. The tarot told me to keep writing it; And the Tarot doesn't lie: especially about MOB GUY (CONT'D) Jimmy Fallon, you slimy bastard. “The Good Guy” Am i slimy? I'm probably slimy. Yikes. MAFIA GUY FALLON, you rat-faced lyin' bastard! Ah shit, the Jimmy-isms. I almost forgot about them. (I didn't.) [Unintelligible blabbering in hysterics.] Which one is that?! Doesn't matter. Just get the Jimmy into the elevator before anybody actually sees him. That's it. This dude's got to believe in God, or something. Christ. Yowza. Why do you think that? Nothing else makes sense. Heavy price to pay, don't you think? Whatever, dog. To risk everything–your career, your livelihood–your family– On just one idiot? Sorry. Well, you ought to be. I said i was. Yeah, but somehow, I don't think i believe yas. Are you catholic? On my mudda. Then really, honestly–I don't think you believe in anything. What did you just say to me? (the irony is that this mobster is having a conversation with the living incarnation of Jesus Christ himself.) That is irony, but how is anybody else going to actually understand what's happening in this story. Explain to me why it's Jason Sudakis that remembers everything? I don't know exactly. Because. In all of the timelines, in all of the stories, there's at least one principal character from each group of characters that remembers absolutely everything. {Enter The Multiverse} You still didn't find him? No! It's no use! We've looked everywhere. Seriously. Seriously. Of course– [An exasperated sigh, then a brief pause] Make the feelings go away. ok. What drug is this. All of them. Did you check under the craft services table? What? Seriously just. OH MY GOD. there he is! See. That's easily the third time i've written that part. Easily. It must have been important, but i couldn't help but wonder why; I had written it at least once and then down again in my notebook after visiting 30 Rock to see Seth Meyers, but hadn't ever pondered until now why exactly something such as this might be so important. Perhaps it was the simple hilarity in the fact that, although having been missing for arguably days or weeks on end, that this character–Jimmy Fallon–or whoever it actually was, is simply unconscious beneath the craft services table, out of view but otherwise in plain sight; How coulda 6-foot tall man— He can't be 6 feet tall. Why not. If Post Malone is 6 feet tall, And this is JImmy Fallon sitting next to Post Malone [Jimmy Fallon is sitting next to (or rather, almost under) Post Malone] Are you sure that's The Real Jimmy Fallon? What? How many are there. Well, there's this guy. >< Hello, mrs. wong. Oh, dear God. This is all just for shits and giggles, right? Right. There will be no shitz. And no giggles! [HANZEL becomes the host of The Tonight Show] What parallel is this? I don't know. Wake me up; it must be a nightmare. It was strange to be almost consistently writing comedy and otherwise almost always feeling on the verge of regurgitation ad nauseum, and constant thoughts about slitting my wrists, as if somehow jumping in front of an oncoming train was suddenly out of the question. It wasn't. But i thought more constantly about slitting my wrists, And the worse part of it was, It was actually serious. I started to worry about myself and take long, thoughtless breaks from writing, And speaking, and forging an effort to make the music business work. I stopped caring almost entirely about anything besides taking the minimal effort to exercise and shower, which I knew that in its worst states, depression often enough kept other people from doing. I couldn't stop caring enough not to shower, and though I was eating more than usual, my abdomen was an alarmingly firm plank; it was kind of weird to have a flat stomach, but the exercise bike and occasional run was keeping me average, if anything, by american standards, above average, however one look at Lindsay Lohan sent me backward trying to remember what it was like to be anything close to some kind of woman, or some kind of phenomenon, or some kind of perfectly trained monkey; not that I considered the performer as such, however, dismantling my aversion for the aforementioned sent a striking resemblance to the-1 Stop there. LINDSAY LOHAN FUCK. Are you serious? SUNNI BLU SHH! Why , I want to show you something. LINDSAY LOHAN GODDAMIT! IT ALWAYS CUTS OFD WHEN IT GET TO MY PART! SUNNI BLU SHHHH. OTHRR SUNNÏ BLŪ Shhh, chill. It's our part. LINDSAY LOHAN Where the fuck did you come from? SUNNI BLU II Heaven, baby. What is it. My basement. I–no–Gosh– Step inside. LINDSAY LOHAN Stop fucking around with the Illuminati. SUNNI BLU What does that mean! LINDSAY LOHAN There are literally two of you right now. SUNNI BLU More to love! –at least I was pulling together a decent Trump impersonation from Meyers, and tried not to think too poignantly about the seething hate a woman like Tina Fey might actual harbor for someone like me. What are you, anyway? I's hopin you'd tell meh. {L E G E N D S} He's a psycho. Huh. Jimmy Fallon is a fucking psychopath. You're kidding me. I'm not kidding you. I'm serious. I'm serious. I knew that. This is serious. Why are you meditating? I'm summoning it. What?! Summoning. We are live in like, 5 minutes. Where the fuck is JImmy? Jimmy what? You are all idiots. Summoning it. Quit meditating and get backstage. I'm– –concentrating… [The Festival Project ™ ] More Cream of Wheatn? Yeus. Mor Cream uf Wheatun. Wheeeeeet. CARTMAN. GODDDDDAMMMNIT< WHUT. TELEPLONE. WHUT. TELE– ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT. UHHNNN. Ah. Bones. [Bones Duggar] Fancy seeing you here. …is it? Man, am I still writing The TV People? I guess so. I thought I was getting in trouble for writing anything about— CUT TO: What are you doing? Midget fishing. What?! AGHHHHHH! What in the fuck. I caught one. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. I'm midget fishing. ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Haha: here you go little guy. [he hands the man a lollipop; the man is furious.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. It's your reward! Enjoy. WHAT THE FUCK DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU?! A midget. YOUVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? He pulls the large hook from out of his Jacket. YOU OWE ME; THIS IS A $2,000 SUIT. Two grand—even in that size?! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS! Ah, alright. [he pulls out a $100 bill and hands it to the man.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? {Enter The Multiverse} Catherine enters with the children. KATHERINE Go hug your father. omg was it Catherine or Katherine. I don't know. It's been so long. It's Katie. PATRICK I'm their father; you don't need to tell them to hug me. KATHERINE Sophie wouldn't. If I didn't tell her, she wouldn't do it. Sophie?! Who the fuck is Sophie?! It's two syllables, at least… What was the middle one's name? Not Sophie. Sophie will do for now. I'm still not ready to go all the way back into that hole. [Patricks's middle child hugs him begrudgingly.] I like Edie Falco for the mom. Edie Falco? I love Edie Falco. So we got—Edie Falco, and some dude who looks like Jimmy Fallon. There is no Jimmy Fallon. Some dude who looks like him. Apparently there's only one of those. Whatever. Whatever, indeed. Okay— so CUT TO: INTERVIEWER/REPORTER –And–What is your standing relationship with JImmyFallon ELMO Excuse me? Your relationship with Jimmy Fallon? ELMO What did you just say to me? What? Jimmy Fallon. ELMO This interview is over. [Elmo dismissively exits.] Wait. Elmo. Come back. ELMO No. No more questions. Elmo! ELMOWe're done here. What do you want, Kimmel?! I WANT TO TALK TO GHOSTS. —which ghost do you want? [beat] …which ones you got? [beat] …which ones do you want? I'll make a list. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

SUNNI BLU becomes a man. I guess. Golly. You sure do seem intolerant. Are you sure you don't want a Peloton. I want to live in a white neighborhood And make enough money That my white neighbors Actually respect me For whatever it is I do. Working on a Saturday. Calm down, Jew mom. I will not clam down. In this house, we abide by holy law! Hold on. What happened. I got distracted, this girl looks just like Edie Falco. Oh, I love Edie Falco. Right? I realized how bizarre my creative process really was, in that days I would get the most work done musically, I became physically restful, and complacent, not worrying about the gym so much as the energy I would use rather towards the music I was making, or the over all lacsidasical approach I took to everything. Not being an entirely-perfect stepford- divorcee with a bleach clean everything in my median space, I realized it was almost a more natural kind of creature that created my music; one who ate and acted normally, and was overall less of an anally retentive bitch—not to say that my normal self was not an anally retire bitch, I was, but it was that my creative process seemed to require more normalcy and averageness; eating regularly, What the fuck man. Idk. I got bored The wheels start turning The pages in my mind become phenomenon, I almost bought it I almost bought the dream; Another story arc. Trust, or don't trust? I don't know— these guys are like the ultimate fluffers… MEAT CIRCUS. MEAT CIRCUS. Okay, I love them. …did she light the candle? Oh look, a candle. Hm. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. THEY ADDED GPS TO EDC so then. How many of us are there. Hey. Everybody sit the fuck down, right now. [drones sit down] There she goes. Dammit. Why are you really this short in person? On God, because I'm really this short, irl. Skrillex. NO. Get over here for a second. Wanna go to Disneyland? On my life, I'm like in Cancun right now, but— But what? I'll catch the next flight. “The Uptopia” I thought about finagling a way to get into EDC for like 5 seconds before I remembered what it was, And that i'm a DJ And that it looks cool and all— But sounds, generally like a total nightmare. Not because it wouldn't be fun or anything- a It just wouldn't be fun— —for me. EDC part III Haven't I been to edc more than 3 times already. (Try like 30 times.) —that's enough times. THATS NOT ENOUGH TIMES GIMMIE MY BOX! DID YOU GET THE MAGNET . I GOT THE MAGNET. GET IN THE— Goddamn, dude. That's a lot of magnets. It's really not. Man, what the fuck would even happen if I fuckin actually focused on this project I don't know. I like, haven't focused on this project and it seems like, possibly, maybe I might have brokered some kind of deal that may or may not include Coca Cola and NBC. This dude might be trying to rule the world. All the dudes might be trying to rule the world, I think. Well, what if we put them all in a group together or something —seems—doable And maybe if they're not trying to kill each other, hey the end of of— Oh, look. World peace. Nice. —it. Hm. Let's just say, Altogether I give a total of actually zero fucks— Ah hah And at the end of the day, I just want some dick. How is that going to help achieve world peace, exactly. Fuck around and find out. Ladies. Here, yo. Guy, what's this. A midlife crisis waiting to happen. Oh no. Don't worry, it's almost over. My midlife crisis? No, the part before that. Jellyfishing. I don't know, Patrick, seems like kind of a strange day to go jellyfishing. Just—relax. Jesus Christ. (Soft telephone voice) This is the messiah speaking. Uh…hi. How may I direct your call? Uh… Hello. …is your dad home? Euh…probably not, but I can get you my mom. …that might work. Okay, hold on. (Not telephone voice—actually atrocious Boston accent) MAAAAA. …Jesus Christ. What? TELEPHONE. ring ring. Bitch! Ring ring ring! —bitch! Ring ring ring. —BITCH! Yo! What!! Answer the phone. The phone is ringing! Why do you keep saying “bitch”?! Cause that's a bitch ass telephone, bitch! This is improv! I know! And the first rule of improv is to not saying no, but I refuse to answer a telephone that just says “ring, ring”; that is not a realistic telephone, and so to that, I would just say—“bitch.” Bitch. That is not how improv works. I'ma aim at your head; you technically lost the game already stopping the scene; you said “ring-ring” I said “bitch”; you lost already, I done my part. What? Just—if you're gonna be a phone, be a phone, but don't just say “ring-ring” like that Take me all out of character and shit. What character?! All you said is “bitch!” And all you said was “ring-ring”, hoe—I ain't got time for this— What?! Just be a phone! THAT WAS A PHONE. What phone says ring-ring? Phone ring tone “Ring-ring!” What's that. That's my new ringtone. You're so lame. Well at least we got past the 90's and were clearly into the early two thousands. How do you know? That guy has a ringtone. Who is that guy, anyway—? wait a second! Oh shit. That's him! Get em! Ah, are we bringing back the Italians? I don't think they ever left, they've just been quiet. I want pizza. You're in luck. Goddamn kid! Pizza?! French fries. —I want chocolate cake. AND chocolate cake! Goddamn. You'd better be crafting a goddamn symphony. It's more of like a sonata. “The King Suite” Whatever! Just remember however far you get writing this album is how much more gym time it'll take to be taken seriously promoting it. I'm already promoting it. What, how? LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA DAY. welcome back, kid. Shut up; give me a house. Give me a house song! Okay. OKAY, now downtempo. Downtempo makes me sleepy— but whatever, here. Okay, now techno. Untz-untz—here you are. All it took me was seeing Tiesto's ancient ass plastered all over the place in Brooklyn to realize I don't think it'll ever be “too late” to be a DJ and perhaps I could stand to focus on my other masteries. Whatever. I want chocolate cake . You are gonna get so fat. So? So is she when she pops out three kids— And her music sucks. Sauciness is relative. It sounds like shit in a fucking sandwhich. Just remember tiestos wife is actually like a decade younger than you. Great. I'm looking forward to all my favorite DJ's cradle robbing fashion week for this exact fucking reason. Is that a dig on one of the most legendary dance music DJs of our time? No, it's more of another pondering as to why I wasn't born a 9 foot tall porcelain skin blonde European looking model. I must have done something wrong in a previous existence. Have you tried paddle boarding? That seems /lame Fun! If I start now, maybe by May I can be EDC fit. What's the point of being EDC fit and not going to EDC? Hm. Okay. I can get a peloton, Or EDC tickets— Which should it actually be? What's the point of having a peloton If you're not going to EDC. Correct. But also— Why bother going to EDC at all if you're not going to be mad ripped from riding a peloton all day in your apartment. Also facts. That's what I'm here for Suddenly, I was acting weird. [being weird] Well, weirder than usual. Suddenly, my mind was racing— I was running around my apartment frantically in a halter top that I was certain I looked fabulous in— [looking at least kind of fabulous] — lil bitz. I'm getting to the age where I haven't quite given up, But realizing I'm not going to be the ideal just kind of sits with me in little ways. I haven't let go of myself, I'm not all the way giving up, but I'm more like, settled and secure with myself. A little more self confident in knowing if I wanted just any old dude, I can go out and get one. But I've been saving myself for someone really special. I mean really. And it's been years since I had sex. Actual years, so like— I'm at the point where I can just keep waiting, But sometimes I realize how long it's been, For instance, when I'm shopping, And I'm just kind of, looking around online Figuring out exactly what I want— And I'm scrolling, looking at all the selections And I see this baguette— Like bread, guys. Like a French roll and I think to myself “I'll take that.” I'm getting kind of turned on just looking at it, like Realizing it's bread— I'm like “Ooh, look at this baguette… Oui oui.” lol the fuck is wrong with you. Honestly I'm just looking for vegan chocolate cake without having to make it. Are we a team? …uhhh… kinda depends on who is “we” But since I can hear you faintly in my head, I guess so. Suddenly, I had the feeling that I had written something recently that might at some point become important. Hey. What. I like your five year plan. What fucking five year plan. The one from five years ago. Oh. Wait—what. Let's make it an 8 year plan. You mean 8 years from…from 5 years ago? See, you are good at math. —I—wait, what plan. Okay [chuckles awkwardly] See you later. What. Man, why do like half the characters in this show look and sound like Dillon Francis. Cause they're Dillon Francis. Might as well be. I had also has realized at a certain point recently that I would probably never get married again, and in my own right had set out to be “The Ultimate Lover!” Get out of here, Skrillex. What in the fuck is with that dude. What's wrong with him anyway. Something. Get out. FUCK, HE'S DEAD. Oh well. Not oh well! Someone's definitely gonna be upset about his. Probably! But that's an entirely seperate demographic. We can't be concerned with that. Not our business, The man is dead! You don't know, maybe he's just in A k-hole! [super duper dead] Whatever man. Just— Can you at least give me a hand with his legs. He's heavy. How can he be taller than he looks on TV— Goddamn, he wreaks! He hasn't even been dead long enough for that. I know, he just wreaks, man. Whatever. Look. Just— Ugh— Let's roll him into that tent over there. What. Just roll him in-/ Agh. And hurry up— Virtual Riot is about to start. Goddamn. The wooks. These aren't any ordinary wooks. They're frat boys Oh, that headdress, though. You remember the headdress! I remember the everything, I'm just— trying to forget. Crimes. Or at least—pretending to. You remember David after the dentist? [David after the dentist] AAAAAGAAGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH Well, this is James after The Jam. Mm. What kind Of Jam is this! It's—Jelly. Ah. You're dead. It's—really good. You know what— This is Sauerkraut. Happy accidents is getting weird. Man. I like it. Untz untz untz I just found this out, and I'm over the moon like exactic about this— I just found out you can like, totally buy 5 lbs of marijuana Over the internet. For what? I don't know. Sounds like a deal. Sign me up. Anyway, I found this out— Because I found this bread I like Yes— I know Bread to marijuana We are—making connections— Anyway, I found this bread I like From this one place, And I love this place so much That I begin buying this bread regularly— I love it so much that, I'm looking through all their breads in their bakery and I realize, “Holy shit—they just have the most insane bakery, ever.” Like all the breads are sounding phenomenal— They're real bread— Most bread if it's real bread is vegan, So I'm looking through the bread like, “Holy shit, this all sounds fire—“ And when I like a place a lot— Especially in New York, I get weird about it. Like, I want to know the origins of the place. I love history— History—cannabis—and bread, I know. “Whose the lucky guy?!” lol. Nobody, obviously— if this is my life; but I digress. I'm looking at all these breads, All these artisanal, like— Fresh cakes and, Really unique like, Breads of every kind— And I start thinking to myself “I love this place.” “I love this place” So I start thinking about like the origins of this place— You know like, historically— Like, Sometimes you find cool stuff out about a place Macy's or whatever, Has cool history— Like the oldest surviving wooden escalator Being at the flagship department store in midtown Stuff like that. I love history— So I go to look up this place— I type this place into the search bar with absolutely no other specifications than I think, The name— And the first link that comes up Is a fire sale of 5 pounds of “hemp flower” But from the picture I can see that it's evidently really Complete marijuana— Actual cannabis flower; So I look into this matter, and I investigate this link a little further to figure out— “What is this?” And as it turns out, my suspicions are correct, You can now obtain large quantities of marijuana Via a Google search— By complete accident. I'm like, “Woah!” [Bookmark the page and shit.] “Keep that in there for later…” You know, just in case I ever have $2,200 dollars roughly of disposable income and ever feel like upstarting my very own drug enterprise… Er, restarting— But the drug enterprise I had in college was nothing like this— This is next level. Its the internet age now, buddy! Shit is legitimate. Wait, sorry— is the statute of limitations up yet? Whatever. Leave no trace. There—are bigger fish to fry. lol. Bread, man. I love bread. You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you Doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) Cause it doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you It doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) I'm still in love with you— You know I'm still in love with you. You know what— Huh— Does lemon raspberry sound better or like, This caramel toffee? You know I love a good lemon ice cream— Lemon custard Posh. Ah, the hedons are back. /*herons (You know Insomniac's making their rounds. ) Getdamoney Getdamoney getda— Woah— hold up, what is this I don't know Looks lucrative Facts Hmmm— Worthwhile investment, perhaps Maybe, maybe Very well Getdamoney Getdamoney Getdamoney Take a look at this young buck, they said. So I did. Turns out, the jokes on me. Me, and all my old friends In all my old lives On all my old world Play games In other words, The world goes on, Then off, Then it goes on, We come home— To laugh with one another Me and my friends, We play games Out of body Mind games In the body Play lives, All for entertainment In the old world, We said “One” Off we run, I said So on, comes dawn again We all talk of old reunion. We all talk of— FUCK, man. It's non dairy. I don't give a fuck about your ice cream! We're all on ice cream. I don't give a fuck about ice cream! On, you don't. No! Alright. Done. You know, it's like one door opens— Another door closes; And that's true— But whatever fucking weird drone robots They're probably paying to just come in one door And out the other Are karma cannons— And by that I mean— Whatever's disturbing me; Will eventually disturb them— And maybe, just maybe— In the same annoying way. So one day somebody wakes up and writes an anthology saga about you. It's not about you, it's about me— That's what I said. And that's probably what happened anyway—is what I'm thinking—and either way, I'm just the protagonist of that series, anyway. That's—logical, I'm thinking. I'm also thinking. Man. It feels so good to just sit in silence. Yeah. It does. Didn't you want kids? Whatever. Abusive relationships suck. My version of our kid is hands down way better then your version of our kid. Hands down. Let's get down to the nitti grotti of things here. Nitty Gritty. 11:30. But that's when Tranwrexk is playing. Who the fuck is teaintwrext. No, it's. Whatever. Nitti gritti Okay, so I'm obviously like, not going to forget the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's— But I think maybe even the best part about it was the fact that it was like, a pug. I'm not really ready to go out in public or anything-1 I don't know— I'm like traumatized by the disparity of the human race, or whatever. But shout out to the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's. I don't know what he did. But if you're gonna beat your pug at the Trader Joe's, he probably deserved it. Goddamn you Marc Jacobs! This is what you get for leaving a puddle in produce section! Goddammit! What else are you gonna name a purebred pug that you take everywhere with you— Including Trader Joe's? “This is Marc Jacobs” We thought he was a puggle but it turns out he was a purebreed and we just got so lucky! He gets nervous around people— Sometimes especially at the Trader Joe's He just gets so excited! Bad Marx Jacobs! BAD! On another note why am I just not automatically genetically built like a 6'5 Scandinavian chick. Like, it's cool my legs don't grow any hair at all, but goddamnit I would rather walk fashion week and just— Automatically never be hungry. Imagine giving birth to a supermodel baby and just Here, baby— take this The baby is like: *milks for two seconds* Alright, I'm good. Are you sure, baby. The baby's like “I'm— all full” Are you sure? Baby's like yeah— put me on the treadmill for an hour, would you? I gotta go fast-crawl this all off. Breastmilk, whew. Heavy shit. Just set the incline to all the way up, alright— And make sure I turn up the propane pig to high volume I want to make sure I'm deaf in one ear And only have one brain cell I don't want them to think I talk to much. Mom's like, “Um, okay— are you sure you don't just want like, more breastmilk” Baby's like “No ma, put me on the treadmill and shut the fuck yo you fat cow!” Goddammit, alright. That's— Some kids are just born destined to be— whatever— you know? Me? I was destined to like food, but be pretty much allergic to it— Pretty much allergic to all of it. Not in the typical sense of like having a food allergy— Not getting hives or anything Just— Prone to max weight gain after minimal, regular fucking eating— Minimal fucking eating And maximum effort in the gym just equals More muscle Which, then, The excess fat will just sit on top of Sort of like— Just double fucking bad. It's insane. So that's two waist trainers Correct Two sauna suits Oh my God, what if he's actually 6'3? Who's 6'3?! Getawayfromme. Shoot that nigga. You have a nice double chin. Thanks, I got it myself Liz Nice. Comedy Central presents: roast of the hosts The comics of late night tv roast each other l HOw many jokes do I need? A lot. Let's start with the favorite Favorite? Nah. Jimmy Fallon looks constpated. Every time I see that dude, I'm like— —?! What's wrong with him. Also— Why do you look like the off brand version of Justin long? I smell a conspiracy. And aspercreme. What's up with your cheeks, bro? Are you a hippopotamus? — Jay Leno is like God's version of a live action caricature. _____ Why are you all Irish? ____ Kimmel— what kind of bird are you? —- . —- I've heard exchanging insults is like foreplay for comedians; now I'm genuinely starting to wonder how many of these specials have turned over into orgies. I always had a special feeling about Justin Bieber and Martha Stewart. I'm pretty sure we all did. Mama had a shotgun— And daddy hated broken glass I drink out of broken bottles Clasps slip from the hands That can't Grab Shit you're too fucking tall, anyway. The only person who's actually bigger than they look on TV Fuck that. What are you, 6'10? Stay the fuck over there yeo ming. Who drew you, Disney/Pixar? How do you be in a photo from head to toe; full body in the frame and still not be in the picture? This m'fucker's a ghost. Oh look. It's everyone's favorite blow up doll. WHY DO U LOOK ASIAN? WHO TF DID UR DAD KILL IN NAM? –KOREA? EITHER WAY. YOU'RE ASIAN BRO. You seem like that kid that used to walk up on his tiiiy toes and shit. You're weird, bro. That kid that used to walk up— —like this— That's that guy. Devil can't catch me if I don't sit still Still love Run around the world Ring around the Rosie I'm not broke, I jus got. Photo shoot coming up Hang up yo on the fence, Like paint I dry, Simi dinner hard Try hard see the light, go To the light now Go now, my time has come m Go where, how? It's time now for me to depart, my dear Ishii. Why—how?! Because, my boy—the time has come Time not what is! Time be us, you and I! And as we are, my dear boy. I must go. Time nothing but mind is you and I… You are right. Time — is— time. Ishii begins to cry softly, and then weep. Fair for fair and follow for follow— There not are I, And away we went, With wind and time, And the way was one The inside of a year, As the waking of dawn. At dawn, I strike— But was not called To weep, I wake, the tire of tale And yet the sun was in my heart, Yet not in my mind as the sky, And not in the time as the wind, and still, mi follow to love again I always call, And there, the wind where wind does lie, Not I, awake, but I instead as Sunset Again as time had sat upon my should And like bird does cry, The still be wind has shattered my love And in heart lives in such such dusk As pain, my heart, The wicked beauty, Shadowed and stranded Yet I awaken, And here ye, The vow dost took is not aligned— There I was, the call of once The statuesque and haunting Bleeding dry the river's way And almost as such there though of tears With yet had formed all shallow, and none The call of ways I mask misfortunes, There does bear a truth to the tree which bears fruit And give way to time, I am as oceans, Still as steady water's sky, and come what may Of all we have, There nothing lost, And there were fortunes True to shine as gold, And there in no way, Under us. Wax does melt but has not burned, As shadowtimes had set upon us, There, the call was made, and yes The wind had sat upon the waking dawn of eye And there, again the warrior ready for none other than the song of I, The cry of war, does wait unsettled in her wailing As their call had come As of naught, And then came, As does one. Be fair. Daggers! I rot. “Be fair”, says he. Daggers. I rot! Be fair, says I. Nay, The King. True, tis I. —and daggars! I rot. Wary. I find. So then, To have walked among the living and yet are dead— still you, waiting in quarry, Are now I not as King, As though now dost lie slain. Very. A greeting! Seeing now how such has i, Have passed and still yet waiting in how l My waking This fucker just won't die! Well, he can't. He can! (He should.) He has. Oh. Are you triggered. I knew I just have been getting somewhat important Somewhat. I figured this out when they started having people show up after I get to the gym. I knew they were all the same like people, cause for the the most part, they weren't working out, they would just like, align themselves with me, do a few pumps and then do whatever on their phones This one dude came in, and I was already sick of being followed Hadn't been to the gym in a few days cause these people just fucking bother me. Just fucking blows my mind how stupid people are— And I realized something really wrong with people. Like people are really fucked up inthe head, so, This is what I did, when I realized, they weren't going to stop fucking with me in a certain way, I started fucking with them back. I went upstairs to work out, started doing circuits. Did some pumps up stairs, Run the stairs like laps, Hit the tension machine, Kettlebells, Treadmill, then another circuit— {Enter The Multiverse} And I knew whoever was sending these people We're focused on fucking me up; Cause the people they sent were always like— Some kind of trigger. I knew it was some high level programming; They would send like a pretty girl with long hair To fuck me up Or some fat ugly dude who looked like my ex husband, Fat and shit, And they wouldn't workout much, they would just like, fuck around, then hit the phone— And I realized people were really fucking sick In the head, when I realized, After I psyched the fuck out of this fat dude Just fucking running circles around him and shit, Lifting more than he was struggling to fucking lift This dude is all upper body No fucking cardio No fucking legs Weak dick motherfucker. And I realized how sick people were when he goes up stairs And this is how else I know people are fucking with me They'll always get on the phone, And use their phones as intimidation and shit “Hi, yeah, yeah— I'm checking in. I'm a pussy ass robot and shit. Okay. Bye now. Wait—did you hit my cashapp yet? Okay thanks” How you know it's like an app or some shit. Fucking drones, man. But I could tell they were sick and I was somewhere in my way to wellness when, the dude left, then goes upstairs and gets on the phone, and I'm still downstairs and I'm like “Okay, since they're gonna keep fucking with me—when is the end of this album?” I went to check and I knew the album was an hour long— And I look and the album is on the last track and I thought to myself “I haven't touched my phone in at least an hour…” This dude has been in the gym for half the time and has almost not been off the phone He was on the phone more than working out And that's when I realized, Whether I skip a few days at the gym or not Whether I do what everybody else is doing or not Just that alone is rare. He was in the gym maybe a half hour or less And between every single set, he's on the phone Just like all of the other people who seemed to have been following me— And I realized That maybe they weren't even following me on purpose. Maybe they were being remotely sent in my direction somehow with their phones, without their intention or knowing. That is a possibility— And I knew the world had changed in a way that could possibly become dangerous, after being told for x amount of years we needed a SIM card, I've had my phone for almost 5 years, same model; up until now we “needed” a simcard— Now all of a sudden they're letting us know in one way or another “Hey, no we've always been able to remote control your phone” They've inteoduced the “e sim” which is their subtle way of letting you know They've always been able to turn on your phone signal Without you even knowing. Now they're selling you this technology “Oh, you don't need a sim—e sim” I looked, I didn't think my phone would be clmpatible It's a 5 year old model. “Oh no—it's compatible! Congratulations” Which means even 5 years ago before this technology became consumer, They had the ability to open your phone make calls texts and connect to a network They're just now letting you know This has been around for at least a decade And now they're selling it to you. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

SUNNI BLU becomes a man. I guess. Golly. You sure do seem intolerant. Are you sure you don't want a Peloton. I want to live in a white neighborhood And make enough money That my white neighbors Actually respect me For whatever it is I do. Working on a Saturday. Calm down, Jew mom. I will not clam down. In this house, we abide by holy law! Hold on. What happened. I got distracted, this girl looks just like Edie Falco. Oh, I love Edie Falco. Right? I realized how bizarre my creative process really was, in that days I would get the most work done musically, I became physically restful, and complacent, not worrying about the gym so much as the energy I would use rather towards the music I was making, or the over all lacsidasical approach I took to everything. Not being an entirely-perfect stepford- divorcee with a bleach clean everything in my median space, I realized it was almost a more natural kind of creature that created my music; one who ate and acted normally, and was overall less of an anally retentive bitch—not to say that my normal self was not an anally retire bitch, I was, but it was that my creative process seemed to require more normalcy and averageness; eating regularly, What the fuck man. Idk. I got bored The wheels start turning The pages in my mind become phenomenon, I almost bought it I almost bought the dream; Another story arc. Trust, or don't trust? I don't know— these guys are like the ultimate fluffers… MEAT CIRCUS. MEAT CIRCUS. Okay, I love them. …did she light the candle? Oh look, a candle. Hm. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. SHE LIT THE CANDLE. THEY ADDED GPS TO EDC so then. How many of us are there. Hey. Everybody sit the fuck down, right now. [drones sit down] There she goes. Dammit. Why are you really this short in person? On God, because I'm really this short, irl. Skrillex. NO. Get over here for a second. Wanna go to Disneyland? On my life, I'm like in Cancun right now, but— But what? I'll catch the next flight. “The Uptopia” I thought about finagling a way to get into EDC for like 5 seconds before I remembered what it was, And that i'm a DJ And that it looks cool and all— But sounds, generally like a total nightmare. Not because it wouldn't be fun or anything- a It just wouldn't be fun— —for me. EDC part III Haven't I been to edc more than 3 times already. (Try like 30 times.) —that's enough times. THATS NOT ENOUGH TIMES GIMMIE MY BOX! DID YOU GET THE MAGNET . I GOT THE MAGNET. GET IN THE— Goddamn, dude. That's a lot of magnets. It's really not. Man, what the fuck would even happen if I fuckin actually focused on this project I don't know. I like, haven't focused on this project and it seems like, possibly, maybe I might have brokered some kind of deal that may or may not include Coca Cola and NBC. This dude might be trying to rule the world. All the dudes might be trying to rule the world, I think. Well, what if we put them all in a group together or something —seems—doable And maybe if they're not trying to kill each other, hey the end of of— Oh, look. World peace. Nice. —it. Hm. Let's just say, Altogether I give a total of actually zero fucks— Ah hah And at the end of the day, I just want some dick. How is that going to help achieve world peace, exactly. Fuck around and find out. Ladies. Here, yo. Guy, what's this. A midlife crisis waiting to happen. Oh no. Don't worry, it's almost over. My midlife crisis? No, the part before that. Jellyfishing. I don't know, Patrick, seems like kind of a strange day to go jellyfishing. Just—relax. Jesus Christ. (Soft telephone voice) This is the messiah speaking. Uh…hi. How may I direct your call? Uh… Hello. …is your dad home? Euh…probably not, but I can get you my mom. …that might work. Okay, hold on. (Not telephone voice—actually atrocious Boston accent) MAAAAA. …Jesus Christ. What? TELEPHONE. ring ring. Bitch! Ring ring ring! —bitch! Ring ring ring. —BITCH! Yo! What!! Answer the phone. The phone is ringing! Why do you keep saying “bitch”?! Cause that's a bitch ass telephone, bitch! This is improv! I know! And the first rule of improv is to not saying no, but I refuse to answer a telephone that just says “ring, ring”; that is not a realistic telephone, and so to that, I would just say—“bitch.” Bitch. That is not how improv works. I'ma aim at your head; you technically lost the game already stopping the scene; you said “ring-ring” I said “bitch”; you lost already, I done my part. What? Just—if you're gonna be a phone, be a phone, but don't just say “ring-ring” like that Take me all out of character and shit. What character?! All you said is “bitch!” And all you said was “ring-ring”, hoe—I ain't got time for this— What?! Just be a phone! THAT WAS A PHONE. What phone says ring-ring? Phone ring tone “Ring-ring!” What's that. That's my new ringtone. You're so lame. Well at least we got past the 90's and were clearly into the early two thousands. How do you know? That guy has a ringtone. Who is that guy, anyway—? wait a second! Oh shit. That's him! Get em! Ah, are we bringing back the Italians? I don't think they ever left, they've just been quiet. I want pizza. You're in luck. Goddamn kid! Pizza?! French fries. —I want chocolate cake. AND chocolate cake! Goddamn. You'd better be crafting a goddamn symphony. It's more of like a sonata. “The King Suite” Whatever! Just remember however far you get writing this album is how much more gym time it'll take to be taken seriously promoting it. I'm already promoting it. What, how? LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA DAY. welcome back, kid. Shut up; give me a house. Give me a house song! Okay. OKAY, now downtempo. Downtempo makes me sleepy— but whatever, here. Okay, now techno. Untz-untz—here you are. All it took me was seeing Tiesto's ancient ass plastered all over the place in Brooklyn to realize I don't think it'll ever be “too late” to be a DJ and perhaps I could stand to focus on my other masteries. Whatever. I want chocolate cake . You are gonna get so fat. So? So is she when she pops out three kids— And her music sucks. Sauciness is relative. It sounds like shit in a fucking sandwhich. Just remember tiestos wife is actually like a decade younger than you. Great. I'm looking forward to all my favorite DJ's cradle robbing fashion week for this exact fucking reason. Is that a dig on one of the most legendary dance music DJs of our time? No, it's more of another pondering as to why I wasn't born a 9 foot tall porcelain skin blonde European looking model. I must have done something wrong in a previous existence. Have you tried paddle boarding? That seems /lame Fun! If I start now, maybe by May I can be EDC fit. What's the point of being EDC fit and not going to EDC? Hm. Okay. I can get a peloton, Or EDC tickets— Which should it actually be? What's the point of having a peloton If you're not going to EDC. Correct. But also— Why bother going to EDC at all if you're not going to be mad ripped from riding a peloton all day in your apartment. Also facts. That's what I'm here for Suddenly, I was acting weird. [being weird] Well, weirder than usual. Suddenly, my mind was racing— I was running around my apartment frantically in a halter top that I was certain I looked fabulous in— [looking at least kind of fabulous] — lil bitz. I'm getting to the age where I haven't quite given up, But realizing I'm not going to be the ideal just kind of sits with me in little ways. I haven't let go of myself, I'm not all the way giving up, but I'm more like, settled and secure with myself. A little more self confident in knowing if I wanted just any old dude, I can go out and get one. But I've been saving myself for someone really special. I mean really. And it's been years since I had sex. Actual years, so like— I'm at the point where I can just keep waiting, But sometimes I realize how long it's been, For instance, when I'm shopping, And I'm just kind of, looking around online Figuring out exactly what I want— And I'm scrolling, looking at all the selections And I see this baguette— Like bread, guys. Like a French roll and I think to myself “I'll take that.” I'm getting kind of turned on just looking at it, like Realizing it's bread— I'm like “Ooh, look at this baguette… Oui oui.” lol the fuck is wrong with you. Honestly I'm just looking for vegan chocolate cake without having to make it. Are we a team? …uhhh… kinda depends on who is “we” But since I can hear you faintly in my head, I guess so. Suddenly, I had the feeling that I had written something recently that might at some point become important. Hey. What. I like your five year plan. What fucking five year plan. The one from five years ago. Oh. Wait—what. Let's make it an 8 year plan. You mean 8 years from…from 5 years ago? See, you are good at math. —I—wait, what plan. Okay [chuckles awkwardly] See you later. What. Man, why do like half the characters in this show look and sound like Dillon Francis. Cause they're Dillon Francis. Might as well be. I had also has realized at a certain point recently that I would probably never get married again, and in my own right had set out to be “The Ultimate Lover!” Get out of here, Skrillex. What in the fuck is with that dude. What's wrong with him anyway. Something. Get out. FUCK, HE'S DEAD. Oh well. Not oh well! Someone's definitely gonna be upset about his. Probably! But that's an entirely seperate demographic. We can't be concerned with that. Not our business, The man is dead! You don't know, maybe he's just in A k-hole! [super duper dead] Whatever man. Just— Can you at least give me a hand with his legs. He's heavy. How can he be taller than he looks on TV— Goddamn, he wreaks! He hasn't even been dead long enough for that. I know, he just wreaks, man. Whatever. Look. Just— Ugh— Let's roll him into that tent over there. What. Just roll him in-/ Agh. And hurry up— Virtual Riot is about to start. Goddamn. The wooks. These aren't any ordinary wooks. They're frat boys Oh, that headdress, though. You remember the headdress! I remember the everything, I'm just— trying to forget. Crimes. Or at least—pretending to. You remember David after the dentist? [David after the dentist] AAAAAGAAGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH Well, this is James after The Jam. Mm. What kind Of Jam is this! It's—Jelly. Ah. You're dead. It's—really good. You know what— This is Sauerkraut. Happy accidents is getting weird. Man. I like it. Untz untz untz I just found this out, and I'm over the moon like exactic about this— I just found out you can like, totally buy 5 lbs of marijuana Over the internet. For what? I don't know. Sounds like a deal. Sign me up. Anyway, I found this out— Because I found this bread I like Yes— I know Bread to marijuana We are—making connections— Anyway, I found this bread I like From this one place, And I love this place so much That I begin buying this bread regularly— I love it so much that, I'm looking through all their breads in their bakery and I realize, “Holy shit—they just have the most insane bakery, ever.” Like all the breads are sounding phenomenal— They're real bread— Most bread if it's real bread is vegan, So I'm looking through the bread like, “Holy shit, this all sounds fire—“ And when I like a place a lot— Especially in New York, I get weird about it. Like, I want to know the origins of the place. I love history— History—cannabis—and bread, I know. “Whose the lucky guy?!” lol. Nobody, obviously— if this is my life; but I digress. I'm looking at all these breads, All these artisanal, like— Fresh cakes and, Really unique like, Breads of every kind— And I start thinking to myself “I love this place.” “I love this place” So I start thinking about like the origins of this place— You know like, historically— Like, Sometimes you find cool stuff out about a place Macy's or whatever, Has cool history— Like the oldest surviving wooden escalator Being at the flagship department store in midtown Stuff like that. I love history— So I go to look up this place— I type this place into the search bar with absolutely no other specifications than I think, The name— And the first link that comes up Is a fire sale of 5 pounds of “hemp flower” But from the picture I can see that it's evidently really Complete marijuana— Actual cannabis flower; So I look into this matter, and I investigate this link a little further to figure out— “What is this?” And as it turns out, my suspicions are correct, You can now obtain large quantities of marijuana Via a Google search— By complete accident. I'm like, “Woah!” [Bookmark the page and shit.] “Keep that in there for later…” You know, just in case I ever have $2,200 dollars roughly of disposable income and ever feel like upstarting my very own drug enterprise… Er, restarting— But the drug enterprise I had in college was nothing like this— This is next level. Its the internet age now, buddy! Shit is legitimate. Wait, sorry— is the statute of limitations up yet? Whatever. Leave no trace. There—are bigger fish to fry. lol. Bread, man. I love bread. You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you You make me mad, But I'm still in love with you; You might be far, but I'm still in love with you You might do bad, but I'm still in love with you Come back to bed; You know I'm still in love with you Doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) Cause it doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you It doesn't matter (You know I'm still in love with you) I'm still in love with you— You know I'm still in love with you. You know what— Huh— Does lemon raspberry sound better or like, This caramel toffee? You know I love a good lemon ice cream— Lemon custard Posh. Ah, the hedons are back. /*herons (You know Insomniac's making their rounds. ) Getdamoney Getdamoney getda— Woah— hold up, what is this I don't know Looks lucrative Facts Hmmm— Worthwhile investment, perhaps Maybe, maybe Very well Getdamoney Getdamoney Getdamoney Take a look at this young buck, they said. So I did. Turns out, the jokes on me. Me, and all my old friends In all my old lives On all my old world Play games In other words, The world goes on, Then off, Then it goes on, We come home— To laugh with one another Me and my friends, We play games Out of body Mind games In the body Play lives, All for entertainment In the old world, We said “One” Off we run, I said So on, comes dawn again We all talk of old reunion. We all talk of— FUCK, man. It's non dairy. I don't give a fuck about your ice cream! We're all on ice cream. I don't give a fuck about ice cream! On, you don't. No! Alright. Done. You know, it's like one door opens— Another door closes; And that's true— But whatever fucking weird drone robots They're probably paying to just come in one door And out the other Are karma cannons— And by that I mean— Whatever's disturbing me; Will eventually disturb them— And maybe, just maybe— In the same annoying way. So one day somebody wakes up and writes an anthology saga about you. It's not about you, it's about me— That's what I said. And that's probably what happened anyway—is what I'm thinking—and either way, I'm just the protagonist of that series, anyway. That's—logical, I'm thinking. I'm also thinking. Man. It feels so good to just sit in silence. Yeah. It does. Didn't you want kids? Whatever. Abusive relationships suck. My version of our kid is hands down way better then your version of our kid. Hands down. Let's get down to the nitti grotti of things here. Nitty Gritty. 11:30. But that's when Tranwrexk is playing. Who the fuck is teaintwrext. No, it's. Whatever. Nitti gritti Okay, so I'm obviously like, not going to forget the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's— But I think maybe even the best part about it was the fact that it was like, a pug. I'm not really ready to go out in public or anything-1 I don't know— I'm like traumatized by the disparity of the human race, or whatever. But shout out to the lady beating the shit out of her dog at the Trader Joe's. I don't know what he did. But if you're gonna beat your pug at the Trader Joe's, he probably deserved it. Goddamn you Marc Jacobs! This is what you get for leaving a puddle in produce section! Goddammit! What else are you gonna name a purebred pug that you take everywhere with you— Including Trader Joe's? “This is Marc Jacobs” We thought he was a puggle but it turns out he was a purebreed and we just got so lucky! He gets nervous around people— Sometimes especially at the Trader Joe's He just gets so excited! Bad Marx Jacobs! BAD! On another note why am I just not automatically genetically built like a 6'5 Scandinavian chick. Like, it's cool my legs don't grow any hair at all, but goddamnit I would rather walk fashion week and just— Automatically never be hungry. Imagine giving birth to a supermodel baby and just Here, baby— take this The baby is like: *milks for two seconds* Alright, I'm good. Are you sure, baby. The baby's like “I'm— all full” Are you sure? Baby's like yeah— put me on the treadmill for an hour, would you? I gotta go fast-crawl this all off. Breastmilk, whew. Heavy shit. Just set the incline to all the way up, alright— And make sure I turn up the propane pig to high volume I want to make sure I'm deaf in one ear And only have one brain cell I don't want them to think I talk to much. Mom's like, “Um, okay— are you sure you don't just want like, more breastmilk” Baby's like “No ma, put me on the treadmill and shut the fuck yo you fat cow!” Goddammit, alright. That's— Some kids are just born destined to be— whatever— you know? Me? I was destined to like food, but be pretty much allergic to it— Pretty much allergic to all of it. Not in the typical sense of like having a food allergy— Not getting hives or anything Just— Prone to max weight gain after minimal, regular fucking eating— Minimal fucking eating And maximum effort in the gym just equals More muscle Which, then, The excess fat will just sit on top of Sort of like— Just double fucking bad. It's insane. So that's two waist trainers Correct Two sauna suits Oh my God, what if he's actually 6'3? Who's 6'3?! Getawayfromme. Shoot that nigga. You have a nice double chin. Thanks, I got it myself Liz Nice. Comedy Central presents: roast of the hosts The comics of late night tv roast each other l HOw many jokes do I need? A lot. Let's start with the favorite Favorite? Nah. Jimmy Fallon looks constpated. Every time I see that dude, I'm like— —?! What's wrong with him. Also— Why do you look like the off brand version of Justin long? I smell a conspiracy. And aspercreme. What's up with your cheeks, bro? Are you a hippopotamus? — Jay Leno is like God's version of a live action caricature. _____ Why are you all Irish? ____ Kimmel— what kind of bird are you? —- . —- I've heard exchanging insults is like foreplay for comedians; now I'm genuinely starting to wonder how many of these specials have turned over into orgies. I always had a special feeling about Justin Bieber and Martha Stewart. I'm pretty sure we all did. Mama had a shotgun— And daddy hated broken glass I drink out of broken bottles Clasps slip from the hands That can't Grab Shit you're too fucking tall, anyway. The only person who's actually bigger than they look on TV Fuck that. What are you, 6'10? Stay the fuck over there yeo ming. Who drew you, Disney/Pixar? How do you be in a photo from head to toe; full body in the frame and still not be in the picture? This m'fucker's a ghost. Oh look. It's everyone's favorite blow up doll. WHY DO U LOOK ASIAN? WHO TF DID UR DAD KILL IN NAM? –KOREA? EITHER WAY. YOU'RE ASIAN BRO. You seem like that kid that used to walk up on his tiiiy toes and shit. You're weird, bro. That kid that used to walk up— —like this— That's that guy. Devil can't catch me if I don't sit still Still love Run around the world Ring around the Rosie I'm not broke, I jus got. Photo shoot coming up Hang up yo on the fence, Like paint I dry, Simi dinner hard Try hard see the light, go To the light now Go now, my time has come m Go where, how? It's time now for me to depart, my dear Ishii. Why—how?! Because, my boy—the time has come Time not what is! Time be us, you and I! And as we are, my dear boy. I must go. Time nothing but mind is you and I… You are right. Time — is— time. Ishii begins to cry softly, and then weep. Fair for fair and follow for follow— There not are I, And away we went, With wind and time, And the way was one The inside of a year, As the waking of dawn. At dawn, I strike— But was not called To weep, I wake, the tire of tale And yet the sun was in my heart, Yet not in my mind as the sky, And not in the time as the wind, and still, mi follow to love again I always call, And there, the wind where wind does lie, Not I, awake, but I instead as Sunset Again as time had sat upon my should And like bird does cry, The still be wind has shattered my love And in heart lives in such such dusk As pain, my heart, The wicked beauty, Shadowed and stranded Yet I awaken, And here ye, The vow dost took is not aligned— There I was, the call of once The statuesque and haunting Bleeding dry the river's way And almost as such there though of tears With yet had formed all shallow, and none The call of ways I mask misfortunes, There does bear a truth to the tree which bears fruit And give way to time, I am as oceans, Still as steady water's sky, and come what may Of all we have, There nothing lost, And there were fortunes True to shine as gold, And there in no way, Under us. Wax does melt but has not burned, As shadowtimes had set upon us, There, the call was made, and yes The wind had sat upon the waking dawn of eye And there, again the warrior ready for none other than the song of I, The cry of war, does wait unsettled in her wailing As their call had come As of naught, And then came, As does one. Be fair. Daggers! I rot. “Be fair”, says he. Daggers. I rot! Be fair, says I. Nay, The King. True, tis I. —and daggars! I rot. Wary. I find. So then, To have walked among the living and yet are dead— still you, waiting in quarry, Are now I not as King, As though now dost lie slain. Very. A greeting! Seeing now how such has i, Have passed and still yet waiting in how l My waking This fucker just won't die! Well, he can't. He can! (He should.) He has. Oh. Are you triggered. I knew I just have been getting somewhat important Somewhat. I figured this out when they started having people show up after I get to the gym. I knew they were all the same like people, cause for the the most part, they weren't working out, they would just like, align themselves with me, do a few pumps and then do whatever on their phones This one dude came in, and I was already sick of being followed Hadn't been to the gym in a few days cause these people just fucking bother me. Just fucking blows my mind how stupid people are— And I realized something really wrong with people. Like people are really fucked up inthe head, so, This is what I did, when I realized, they weren't going to stop fucking with me in a certain way, I started fucking with them back. I went upstairs to work out, started doing circuits. Did some pumps up stairs, Run the stairs like laps, Hit the tension machine, Kettlebells, Treadmill, then another circuit— {Enter The Multiverse} And I knew whoever was sending these people We're focused on fucking me up; Cause the people they sent were always like— Some kind of trigger. I knew it was some high level programming; They would send like a pretty girl with long hair To fuck me up Or some fat ugly dude who looked like my ex husband, Fat and shit, And they wouldn't workout much, they would just like, fuck around, then hit the phone— And I realized people were really fucking sick In the head, when I realized, After I psyched the fuck out of this fat dude Just fucking running circles around him and shit, Lifting more than he was struggling to fucking lift This dude is all upper body No fucking cardio No fucking legs Weak dick motherfucker. And I realized how sick people were when he goes up stairs And this is how else I know people are fucking with me They'll always get on the phone, And use their phones as intimidation and shit “Hi, yeah, yeah— I'm checking in. I'm a pussy ass robot and shit. Okay. Bye now. Wait—did you hit my cashapp yet? Okay thanks” How you know it's like an app or some shit. Fucking drones, man. But I could tell they were sick and I was somewhere in my way to wellness when, the dude left, then goes upstairs and gets on the phone, and I'm still downstairs and I'm like “Okay, since they're gonna keep fucking with me—when is the end of this album?” I went to check and I knew the album was an hour long— And I look and the album is on the last track and I thought to myself “I haven't touched my phone in at least an hour…” This dude has been in the gym for half the time and has almost not been off the phone He was on the phone more than working out And that's when I realized, Whether I skip a few days at the gym or not Whether I do what everybody else is doing or not Just that alone is rare. He was in the gym maybe a half hour or less And between every single set, he's on the phone Just like all of the other people who seemed to have been following me— And I realized That maybe they weren't even following me on purpose. Maybe they were being remotely sent in my direction somehow with their phones, without their intention or knowing. That is a possibility— And I knew the world had changed in a way that could possibly become dangerous, after being told for x amount of years we needed a SIM card, I've had my phone for almost 5 years, same model; up until now we “needed” a simcard— Now all of a sudden they're letting us know in one way or another “Hey, no we've always been able to remote control your phone” They've inteoduced the “e sim” which is their subtle way of letting you know They've always been able to turn on your phone signal Without you even knowing. Now they're selling you this technology “Oh, you don't need a sim—e sim” I looked, I didn't think my phone would be clmpatible It's a 5 year old model. “Oh no—it's compatible! Congratulations” Which means even 5 years ago before this technology became consumer, They had the ability to open your phone make calls texts and connect to a network They're just now letting you know This has been around for at least a decade And now they're selling it to you. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

Why didn't you just get out when you could? When could I just ever ‘get out'?? You're probably right. More than probably. I could feel my abdomen creeping up my sides–I was heavier than normal, but mostly all new, lean muscle–the long hours on the cycle bike were making my core a strange and hard, sturdy plank under the soft skin on my tummy, a smooth and comfy and warm, plush layer of autumn coconut oil and sweet potatoes resting on my midriff and thick thighs– I would be the best to hug and cuddle, but since there was no one around I would even consider letting close to me, I sometimes hugged and kissed myself instead; sometimes I squeezed in places I knew his hands should be and wished they were, trying not to tear under the weight of being alone. Now i'm in enemy territory. How do you feel? I don't. God's an asshole. This is the bitter end; Recede, retract back down, bow low Keep your head up, And your head down And your mind up Go to bed now. Something's wrong; I know I am. I don't dare talk to God, When The Knicks are on. I don't dare talk to God When her soaps are on. I don't dare talk to God at all; Did you know you had a heart, after all, but a mind made of straw, run along, watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Come on, Come hard Think of dinner afterward and what you want Think of all the words you never lost Think about the soft sprung hard wood floor Think about a love gone wrong And the worlds spun off course Watch it all burn Watch it all burn Watch it all burn, Come on, Come along now Come along Mama Talismans, strange; Follow the secret, Swallow it hard, and don't throw up (even though you want to) Another God, that With just a look, but never touch Pen to pad and now you're on, off again but at least not as far off As you woke up Have a word, God Soft spoken and All out of numbers Ah, come on heart, Don't stop, nah Not now, mom Come on, ma Come on As the tear falls and the clock stuck four minutes after Might as well have been an hour, since the clock struck Stuck on asphalt, all you wanted All the God's gone, Come on, heart, Don't pump so much blood Only salt in those, ah You know there are no other ones What does that cost Nothing. Love just falls out of her. What? Nothing. It does cost afterward, The haunts, And all the moving parts The clock struck hummus, All you wanted, once But so much further off that God shook her head And hung her shoulders, Put the world up, and went down in her cot or coffin For just a half hour nap Before the next world war Alright, God– You won that one. Does it hurt less? Nah, i'm alive more. (before i wasn't) Where the fuck are you going? I WAS LOOKING FOR SUNNI BLU. WELL, DID YOU FIND HIM? NO! THEN WHAT THE FUCK! wait a second…you wrote this. Goddamit, just google me already! you wrote this? I don't know. Lets find out! Sorry, no can do. It's a rule Limited exposure, contain your composure. I can guarantee you, not a single human being on this planet can explain to you what's happening right now. Maintain your composure. SUNNI BLU stumbles over what appears to be a dead body on the floor. Ow. Sorry. I thought you were a speed bump. Is that really how it goes? We'll fix it later, cause here's this one. I'd marry a bunson burner before I'd even think about marrying you. What is that supposed to mean–what? Cause there's more fire– Heat? The bunson burner has more heat? That makes like no sense. Are you saying i'm not hot enough for you? Let's just say… We'd have a lot more chemistry. That's what I said! My punchline was better. I'll show you a punchline. __ You can't keep a secret, can you? …i don't know…why. You look like you can't keep a secret. Try me. –fuck that. Go ahead. Nah, fuck that. Tag, youre it. GodDAMMIT. This is literally the most intricate game of tag, like, ever played. dammit. He got me again. How long have you guys been playing. For ever. Forliterally ever. Like always. MOB GUY Man, i'm so fucked for writing this. Why are you still writing this. The tarot told me to keep writing it; And the Tarot doesn't lie: especially about MOB GUY (CONT'D) Jimmy Fallon, you slimy bastard. “The Good Guy” Am i slimy? I'm probably slimy. Yikes. MAFIA GUY FALLON, you rat-faced lyin' bastard! Ah shit, the Jimmy-isms. I almost forgot about them. (I didn't.) [Unintelligible blabbering in hysterics.] Which one is that?! Doesn't matter. Just get the Jimmy into the elevator before anybody actually sees him. That's it. This dude's got to believe in God, or something. Christ. Yowza. Why do you think that? Nothing else makes sense. Heavy price to pay, don't you think? Whatever, dog. To risk everything–your career, your livelihood–your family– On just one idiot? Sorry. Well, you ought to be. I said i was. Yeah, but somehow, I don't think i believe yas. Are you catholic? On my mudda. Then really, honestly–I don't think you believe in anything. What did you just say to me? (the irony is that this mobster is having a conversation with the living incarnation of Jesus Christ himself.) That is irony, but how is anybody else going to actually understand what's happening in this story. Explain to me why it's Jason Sudakis that remembers everything? I don't know exactly. Because. In all of the timelines, in all of the stories, there's at least one principal character from each group of characters that remembers absolutely everything. {Enter The Multiverse} You still didn't find him? No! It's no use! We've looked everywhere. Seriously. Seriously. Of course– [An exasperated sigh, then a brief pause] Make the feelings go away. ok. What drug is this. All of them. Did you check under the craft services table? What? Seriously just. OH MY GOD. there he is! See. That's easily the third time i've written that part. Easily. It must have been important, but i couldn't help but wonder why; I had written it at least once and then down again in my notebook after visiting 30 Rock to see Seth Meyers, but hadn't ever pondered until now why exactly something such as this might be so important. Perhaps it was the simple hilarity in the fact that, although having been missing for arguably days or weeks on end, that this character–Jimmy Fallon–or whoever it actually was, is simply unconscious beneath the craft services table, out of view but otherwise in plain sight; How coulda 6-foot tall man— He can't be 6 feet tall. Why not. If Post Malone is 6 feet tall, And this is JImmy Fallon sitting next to Post Malone [Jimmy Fallon is sitting next to (or rather, almost under) Post Malone] Are you sure that's The Real Jimmy Fallon? What? How many are there. Well, there's this guy. >< Hello, mrs. wong. Oh, dear God. This is all just for shits and giggles, right? Right. There will be no shitz. And no giggles! [HANZEL becomes the host of The Tonight Show] What parallel is this? I don't know. Wake me up; it must be a nightmare. It was strange to be almost consistently writing comedy and otherwise almost always feeling on the verge of regurgitation ad nauseum, and constant thoughts about slitting my wrists, as if somehow jumping in front of an oncoming train was suddenly out of the question. It wasn't. But i thought more constantly about slitting my wrists, And the worse part of it was, It was actually serious. I started to worry about myself and take long, thoughtless breaks from writing, And speaking, and forging an effort to make the music business work. I stopped caring almost entirely about anything besides taking the minimal effort to exercise and shower, which I knew that in its worst states, depression often enough kept other people from doing. I couldn't stop caring enough not to shower, and though I was eating more than usual, my abdomen was an alarmingly firm plank; it was kind of weird to have a flat stomach, but the exercise bike and occasional run was keeping me average, if anything, by american standards, above average, however one look at Lindsay Lohan sent me backward trying to remember what it was like to be anything close to some kind of woman, or some kind of phenomenon, or some kind of perfectly trained monkey; not that I considered the performer as such, however, dismantling my aversion for the aforementioned sent a striking resemblance to the-1 Stop there. LINDSAY LOHAN FUCK. Are you serious? SUNNI BLU SHH! Why , I want to show you something. LINDSAY LOHAN GODDAMIT! IT ALWAYS CUTS OFD WHEN IT GET TO MY PART! SUNNI BLU SHHHH. OTHRR SUNNÏ BLŪ Shhh, chill. It's our part. LINDSAY LOHAN Where the fuck did you come from? SUNNI BLU II Heaven, baby. What is it. My basement. I–no–Gosh– Step inside. LINDSAY LOHAN Stop fucking around with the Illuminati. SUNNI BLU What does that mean! LINDSAY LOHAN There are literally two of you right now. SUNNI BLU More to love! –at least I was pulling together a decent Trump impersonation from Meyers, and tried not to think too poignantly about the seething hate a woman like Tina Fey might actual harbor for someone like me. What are you, anyway? I's hopin you'd tell meh. {L E G E N D S} He's a psycho. Huh. Jimmy Fallon is a fucking psychopath. You're kidding me. I'm not kidding you. I'm serious. I'm serious. I knew that. This is serious. Why are you meditating? I'm summoning it. What?! Summoning. We are live in like, 5 minutes. Where the fuck is JImmy? Jimmy what? You are all idiots. Summoning it. Quit meditating and get backstage. I'm– –concentrating… [The Festival Project ™ ] More Cream of Wheatn? Yeus. Mor Cream uf Wheatun. Wheeeeeet. CARTMAN. GODDDDDAMMMNIT< WHUT. TELEPLONE. WHUT. TELE– ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT. UHHNNN. Ah. Bones. [Bones Duggar] Fancy seeing you here. …is it? Man, am I still writing The TV People? I guess so. I thought I was getting in trouble for writing anything about— CUT TO: What are you doing? Midget fishing. What?! AGHHHHHH! What in the fuck. I caught one. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. I'm midget fishing. ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Haha: here you go little guy. [he hands the man a lollipop; the man is furious.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. It's your reward! Enjoy. WHAT THE FUCK DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU?! A midget. YOUVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? He pulls the large hook from out of his Jacket. YOU OWE ME; THIS IS A $2,000 SUIT. Two grand—even in that size?! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS! Ah, alright. [he pulls out a $100 bill and hands it to the man.] WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? {Enter The Multiverse} Catherine enters with the children. KATHERINE Go hug your father. omg was it Catherine or Katherine. I don't know. It's been so long. It's Katie. PATRICK I'm their father; you don't need to tell them to hug me. KATHERINE Sophie wouldn't. If I didn't tell her, she wouldn't do it. Sophie?! Who the fuck is Sophie?! It's two syllables, at least… What was the middle one's name? Not Sophie. Sophie will do for now. I'm still not ready to go all the way back into that hole. [Patricks's middle child hugs him begrudgingly.] I like Edie Falco for the mom. Edie Falco? I love Edie Falco. So we got—Edie Falco, and some dude who looks like Jimmy Fallon. There is no Jimmy Fallon. Some dude who looks like him. Apparently there's only one of those. Whatever. Whatever, indeed. Okay— so CUT TO: INTERVIEWER/REPORTER –And–What is your standing relationship with JImmyFallon ELMO Excuse me? Your relationship with Jimmy Fallon? ELMO What did you just say to me? What? Jimmy Fallon. ELMO This interview is over. [Elmo dismissively exits.] Wait. Elmo. Come back. ELMO No. No more questions. Elmo! ELMOWe're done here. What do you want, Kimmel?! I WANT TO TALK TO GHOSTS. —which ghost do you want? [beat] …which ones you got? [beat] …which ones do you want? I'll make a list. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

What happens if fascism takes root in the United States? Actors Edie Falco and Tony Shalhoub have teamed up to voice a new radio play called “It Happened Here 2024.” The play, adapted by Richard Dresser from his own novel, imagines an authoritarian country in 2039 where elections are a thing of the past and the rule of law has collapsed. We'll talk to the actors and the playwright about the connections they see between their “audio documentary from the future” and the current political climate. Guests: Edie Falco, actor, known for her roles on "The Sopranos" and "Nurse Jackie" Tony Shalhoub, actor, known for his roles on "Monk" and "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel" Richard Dresser, playwright, screenwriter and novelist, His new radio play is "It Happened Here 2024"

And exclusive sneak peek of a brand new radio play starring Edie Falco, John Turturro and Tony Shalhoub. Inspired by Sinclair Lewis' dystopian novel, It Can't Happen Here, Richard Dresser's novel, and now 6-part radio play called It Happened Here 2024, offers a glimpse of what could happen after the 2024 election if fascism creeps into the USA. The story centers around the Weeks family as they brace for the election. Paul and Ruth's family work to defeat the so-called Great Leader. Paul's brother Garret and his family are on the other side. Family get-togethers are tense. When the Great Leader, with a giant boost from the Supreme Court, shockingly wins the quote, “most important election ever,” the family is thrown into chaos.It Happened Here 2024 describes a country that still has Netflix and free two-day delivery, where the only thing lost is freedom....Listen to the rest of the episodes wherever you get your podcasts!  On the Media is supported by listeners like you. Support OTM by donating today (https://pledge.wnyc.org/support/otm). Follow our show on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook @onthemedia, and share your thoughts with us by emailing onthemedia@wnyc.org.

Bobby worked with Edie on Nurse Jackie. They even shot a few scenes together, but does she remember him? Bob reminds her that they once shared a Thanksgiving together. Edie's new comedy, "I'll Be Right There" is in theaters now and the director Brendan Walsh joins in the fun. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolfSubscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.

Edie Falco & James McAvoy join host Andy Cohen. Listen to lively debates on everything from the latest drama surrounding your favorite Bravolebrities to what celebrity is making headlines that week live from the WWHL clubhouse.Aired on 09/11/24Binge all your favorite Bravo shows with the Bravo app: bravotv.com/getbravoSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Seth takes a closer look at Trump insisting he's not weird and telling the audience they had to vote for him even if they don't like him during a meandering town hall with Sean Hannity on Fox News.Then, Edie Falco talks about getting ready to become an empty nester, reuniting with Nurse Jackie director Brendan Walsh on the film I'll Be Right There and her friendship with Tracy Morgan.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hoda and Jenna give their advice in the latest addition of Girl Code. Also, actress Edie Falco talks about playing a busy mom trying to keep everything together in her new movie ‘I'll Be Right There'. Plus, Katie Lee Biegel joins to share her recipe for Creamy Brussels Sprouts Pasta in TODAY Food. And, lifestyle expert Meredith Sinclair provides some back-to-school solutions for the new school year. 

This week, my good friend William Boyle returned to the podcast to discuss a terrific character actress we both love. Celebrating Edie Falco beyond her tour de force performance as Carmela Soprano on THE SOPRANOS, in this fast-paced conversation, we offer an overview of her work in early indies like LAWS OF GRAVITY, THE UNBELIEVABLE TRUTH, & TRUST, her darling turn in JUDY BERLIN, & the films SUNSHINE STATE, OUTSIDE IN, & THE LAND OF STEADY HABITS. Bio: William "Bill" Boyle is the award-winning author of 8 works of fiction set in the southern Brooklyn neighborhood of Gravesend, where he was born & raised. His books have been nominated for the Hammett Prize, the John Creasey (New Blood) Dagger Award in the UK, & the prestigious Grand Prix de Litterature Policier in France, & have been included on best-of lists in Washington Post, CrimeReads, & more. He currently lives in Oxford, Mississippi. Originally Posted on Patreon (8/14/24) here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/110053462Theme Music: Solo Acoustic Guitar by Jason Shaw, Free Music Archive Shop Watch With Jen logo Merchandise in Logo Designer Kate Gabrielle's Threadless ShopDonate to the Pod via Ko-fi

The only thing we love as much as Best Supporting Actresses is The Real Housewives of New York, so we will combine the two whenever possible. And there's no better example of that than the Season 7 episode “London Calling” when cool Carole and a debut season Dorinda go to London to retrieve the ashes of Carole's late husband. It's an A24 movie begging to be made starring Vera Farmiga and Edie Falco, and features that Delta Lounge, the BONK heard round the world, a Razzie for Father Darius and that best supporting tea service. It was never a burden, it was an honor to recap this episode. Join us for The Best Supporting Aftershow and early access to main episodes on Patreon: www.patreon.com/bsapod Email: thebsapod@gmail.com Instagram: @bsapod Colin Drucker - Instagram: @colindrucker_ Nick Kochanov - Instagram: @nickkochanov

Dave is a bi-coastal, classically trained, character actor who continues to work steadily in TV, Film, Commercials, Web-Series and Theatre. He received a BFA in Acting from Boston University's College of Fine Arts. After graduation, Dave moved to New York City and became very successful in TV commercials and continued advancing his career by working steadily in the theatre. Shalansky then moved to Los Angeles where he gained momentum working regularly in TV. Dave now continues to work on both coasts. His select theatre credits are: Off-Broadway: King of the Jews by Leslie Epstein (Critics Choice Award Nomination, 2023), Toby Belch in Twelfth Night, Stefano in The Tempest: both at the Shakespeare Theatre of New Jersey, Balm In Gilead: Imua Theatre, Dirty Blonde: Florida Studio Theater, and Maggie's Riff: The Vineyard Playhouse. Select TV credits: Recurring Guest Star on Grey's Anatomy, Guest Stars on Law and Order SVU, FBI: Most Wanted, playing Henry Kissinger on The Offer for Paramount+, How to Get Away With Murder, Elementary, Famous in Love, Divorce (with Sarah Jessica Parker), HBO's Vinyl (with Ray Romano), The Mysteries of Laura (with Debra Messing), and Nurse Jackie (with Edie Falco). Also Dave has had supporting roles in such indie films such as: Rosemead with Lucy Liu, The Missing Peace (written and directed by Michael Raymond-James), A Killer Romance, Divorce Invitation (with Elliot Gould and Paul Sorvino) and According to Greta (with Hillary Duff and Ellen Burstyn). Other select TV credits include: Six Feet Under, Legends, Newsreaders, Mob City, Perception, Lie To Me, Ringer, Castle, Southland, and ER. Dave is probably best known for his recurring Guest starring role of Harry on the Gilmore Girls. Dave is monumentally grateful to his wife and daughter for their endless love and support. ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ DAVE SHALANSKY ⌲ IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1682494/ ⌲ IG: https://www.instagram.com/dshalansky/reels/ ⌲ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daveshalansky/ ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ The Moving Spotlight Podcast ⌲ iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-moving-spotlight/id1597207264 ⌲ Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7cjqYAWSFXz2hgCHiAjy27 ⌲ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themovingspotlight ⌲ ALL: https://linktr.ee/themovingspotlight ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ #BFA #BostonUniversity #SandyMarshall #Improv #CharacterActing #ClassicallyTrained #Shakespeare #GreysAnatomy #LawAndOrderSVU #SVU #TheOffer #Emmys #TVTime #iTunes #Actor #ActorsLife #Believe #Success #Inspiration #Netflix #Hulu #Amazon #HBO #AppleTV #Showtime #Acting #Artist #Theatre #Film #YourBestBadActing #Content #CorbinCoyle #JohnRuby #RealFIREacting #TMS_Pod --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/the-moving-spotlight/support

National Bikini day.  Entertainment from 2013.  Battle of Kursk began, Court ruled Ashutosh Mahara could be kept in a freezer, Amazon.com founded.  Todays birthdays - Katherine Helmond, Huey Lewis, Bill Waterson, Marc Cohn, Edie Falco, Claudia Wells, Jason Wade, Adam Young.  Ted Williams died.Intro - Pour some sugar on me - Def Leppard   https://defleppard.com/Itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini - Brian HylandBlurred lines - Robin Thick  TI  PharrellCruise - Florida Georgia LineBirthdays - In da club - 50 Cent   https://www.50cent.com/Who's the boss TV themeDo you believe in love - Huey Lewis and the NewsWalking in Memphis - Marc CohnHanging by a moment - LifehouseFire Flies - Owl CityExit - Its not love - Dokken    https://dokken.net/Follow Jeff Stampka on Facebook and cooolmedia.com 

Host Meg Wolitzer presents two works about losing something, but finding something revealing to take its place.  In “Light,” by Lesley Nkeka Arimah, parents differ about how to raise a strong-willed daughter.  The reader is Crystal Dickinson.  And in Taryn Bowe's “Camp Emeline,” performed by Edie Falco, a family struggles after a loss, but grief leads to self-discovery for the determined narrator. This lovely work also introduces Selected Shorts' first-ever on-air book club.  Wolitzer joins a lively mother/daughter group to talk about Bowe's work and how they related to it. 

#1 New York Times bestselling author and TV producer, Tom Straw, spoke to me about breaking into television, the Gordian knot of ghostwriting, and his new “culinary, espionage, travel thriller” THE ACCIDENTAL JOE. Tom Straw is an Emmy and Writers Guild of America–nominated writer-producer, New York Times bestselling author, and former Mystery Writers of America board member. Writing as Richard Castle, Tom originated the hit Nikki Heat series, writing its first seven novels, all New York Times bestsellers, including Heat Rises, which reached number one. The first book in his latest series is The Accidental Joe: The Top-Secret Life of a Celebrity Chef (Regalo Press/May 14, 2024), described as the story of “...a maverick celebrity chef [who] reluctantly agrees to let the CIA use his hugely popular international food, culture, and travel TV series as cover for a dangerous espionage mission.” Bestselling author Walter Mosley said of the book, “Tom Straw's Sebastian Pike is a wonderful addition to the annals of amateur sleuths of the crime/spy genre.” Culinary personality Alton Brown said of the author, “Tom Straw has set the bar for culinary, espionage, travel thrillers. Actually, I think he invented the bar. And it's a bar I'd meet him at any time.” Tom  Straw's television career has included WGA and Emmy nominations for writing and executive producer stints for shows including Night Court, CBS's Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, and Nurse Jackie with Edie Falco. [Discover The Writer Files Extra: Get 'The Writer Files' Podcast Delivered Straight to Your Inbox at writerfiles.fm] [If you're a fan of The Writer Files, please click FOLLOW to automatically see new interviews. And drop us a rating or a review wherever you listen] In this file Tom Straw and I discussed: His early life as an AM radio personality and professional weatherman How he got a shot to write on his first TV show Working with Craig Ferguson and his robot skeleton sidekick  The short version of hitting #1 as a ghostwriter for a fictitious mystery author  How he invented the snarky, bad-boy, maverick chef for his latest novel And a lot more! Show Notes: tomstraw.com Tom Straw on IMDb The Accidental Joe: The Top-Secret Life of a Celebrity Chef By Tom Straw (Amazon) Tom Straw on Facebook Tom Straw on Twitter Kelton Reid on Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Give us about fifteen minutes a day, and we will give you all the local news, sports, weather, and events you can handle.   SPONSORS: Many thanks to our sponsors… Annapolis Subaru, the SPCA of Anne Arundel County,  Solar Energy Services,and Hospice of the Chesapeake. Today... We have a brief update on the Key Bridge collapse. A fatal crash in Pasadena killed a 31-year-old Chester woman. A Glen Burnie man was arrested on 11 counts of child pornography and released on his own recognizance. The sale of the Orioles has been approved. The Annapolis Film Festival looks to be off the charts with Edie Falco and Jennifer Esposito all expected to attend! As does the Masterworks V concert from the ASO.  Link to daily news recap newsletter: https://forms.aweber.com/form/87/493412887.htm Trevor from  Annapolis Makerspace is here with your Maker Minutes! And as usual, George from DCMDVA Weather is here with your local weather forecast! Please download their app to keep on top of the local weather scene! DAILY NEWSLETTER LINK: https://forms.aweber.com/form/87/493412887.htm The Eye On Annapolis Daily News Brief is produced every Monday through Friday at 6:00 am and available wherever you get your podcasts and also on our social media platforms--All Annapolis and Eye On Annapolis (FB) and @eyeonannapolis (TW) NOTE: For hearing-impaired subscribers, a full transcript is available on Eye On Annapolis.

Chris, Paul & Jordan dig deep into "Join the Club" as all of our characters are held in various forms of Limbo. Tony has a crisis of identity in Costa Mesa, while the family and Family both struggle with the aftermath of Uncle Junior's actions at the end of "Members Only". There are tremendous performances all around, some entrancing (and bizarre) writing, and a cold but beautiful color palate, but the star of the show here is the performance of Edie Falco. Monumental work from the Soprano queen, mirrored by an understated and bewitching performance by our series lead James Gandolfini, as he presents us with a Tony Soprano who is beyond recognition. Is he beyond saving? All this and so much more, right after we take some Pepto Bismol!    WE HAVE A PATREON NOW! Please check us out and support us so we can keep dishing out some audio Sunday dinner for you at www.patreon.com/thesopranospodcast   TheSopranosPodcast@Gmail.com @TheSopranosPodcast - Facebook & Instagram @SopranosPodcast - X (Formerly Twitter)  

Edie Falco is a television, film and stage actor whose roles on HBO's Oz, Showtime's Nurse Jackie and the iconic HBO series The Sopranos have earned her multiple Emmy, Golden Globe, and SAG Awards. She currently stars in the hit Peacock series Bupkis as Pete Davidson's mother. Her Broadway credits include the Tony Award-winning play Sideman, Frankie and Johnny in the Clair De Lune, ‘Night Mother, and The House of Blue Leaves, for which she received a Tony Award Nomination. Off-Broadway she's appeared in The Madrid, This Wide Night, The True, and Morning Sun. Her work in feature film includes Cost of Living (American Film Institute's Best Actress Award), Laws of Gravity (Independent Spirit Award nomination), Sunshine State, Landline, Hurricane, The Funeral, The Addiction, Freedomland, The Land of Steady Habits, Judy Berlin, and the Avatar sequels. …as well as indie film pioneer Hal Hartley's classics The Unbelievable Truth and Trust, which also starred my late wife Adrienne Shelly. Edie and I intimately chat for an hour about childhood, life, family, addiction, her illustrious career, The Sopranos, a possible Nurse Jackie re-boot, Trump and politics, the Knicks, her animal-welfare work and more. Got somethin' to say?! Email us at BackroomAndy@gmail.com Leave us a message: 845-307-7446 Twitter: @AndyOstroy Produced by Andy Ostroy, Matty Rosenberg, and Jennifer Hammoud @ Radio Free Rhiniecliff Design by Cricket Lengyel

We have our first double header @EchoChamberFP https://www.instagram.com/echochamberfp/ episode of 2024!!! In 'Part ONE' we have two from 20th Century Studios one from 2022 and then another with New Regency from 2023. Signature Entertainment, Lipsync Productions & Sky Cinema bring us an action sequel, while StudioCanal & Amazon MGM Studios have a new romantic adventure. AND, 3B-Produktion, Real Fiction Filmverleih & MetFilm Sales have a documentary about a film maestro in cinemas right now!!! In 'Part One' we have: Avatar: The Way of Water Watch Review: Here. https://youtu.be/I19mcDVG4PQ Theatrical Release Date: 16th December 2022 Digital Release Date: 6th December 2023 Director: James Cameron Cast: Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldaña, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, Kate Winslet, Cliff Curtis, Joel David Moore, CCH Pounder, Edie Falco, Brendan Cowell, Jemaine Clement, Jamie Flatters, Jeremy Irwin, Britain Dalton, Chloe Coleman, Trinity Jo-Li Bliss, Jack Champion, Bailey Bass, Filip Geljo, Giovanni Ribisi, Running Time: 192 min Cert: 12a Trailer: Here. https://youtu.be/_ciBXV3MGGc?si=09PX_I9ooH3DXi05 Digital Platforms: Apple TV, Prime Video, YouTube, Google, Vudu, Vubiquity, Cox, and Comcast Website: Here. https://www.disney.co.uk/movies/avatar-the-way-of-water ---------------- One More Shot Watch Review: Here. https://youtu.be/a9YIy887RPQ Digital Release Date: 12th January 2024 Director: James Nunn Cast: Scott Adkins, Michael Jai White, Alexis Knapp, Meena Rayann, Waleed Elgadi, Hannah Arterton, Tom Berenger, Jill Winternitz, Cassidy Little, Aaron Toney, Edward Linard, Christos Dante, Tom Leigh Running Time: 103 min Cert: 18 Trailer: Here. https://youtu.be/QaxJFknK1WE?si=NrmX10HXWpL771LA ---------------- Role Play Watch Review: Here. https://youtu.be/r2EeVNhx0Fg Digital Release Date: 12th January 2024 Director: Thomas Vincent Cast: Kaley Cuoco, David Oyelowo, Connie Nielsen, Bill Nighy, Rudi Dharmalingam, Lucia Aliu, Regan Bryan-Gudgeon, Simon Delaney, Stephanie Levi-John, Jade-Eleena Dregorius Running Time: 101 min Cert: 12a Trailer: Here. https://youtu.be/Bv67rkuWoMg?si=Imsx04yEFOlCN5mc Website: Here. https://press.amazonstudios.com/us/en/original-movies/role-play ---------------- The Creator Watch Review: Here. https://youtu.be/cAPkB9Kj-r4 Theatrical Release Date: 29th September 2023 Digital Release Date: 17th January 2024 Director: Gareth Edwards Cast: John David Washington, Gemma Chan, Madeleine Yuna Voyles, Ken Watanabe, Allison Janney, Sturgill Simpson, Veronica Ngo, Amar Chadha-Patel, Marc Menchaca, Robbie Tann, Ralph Ineson, Michael Esper, Mackenzie Lansing Running Time: 133 min Cert: 12a Trailer: Here. https://youtu.be/DYo4QTsBqP8?si=JruS7v_A4VDNnIi7 Digital Platforms: Apple TV, Prime Video, YouTube, Google, Vudu, Vubiquity, Cox, and Comcast Website: Here. https://www.20thcenturystudios.com/movies/the-creator ---------------- Werner Herzog: Radical Dreamer Watch Review: Here. https://youtu.be/t_EKGf_JNbg Theatrical Release Date: 19th January 2024 Buy Tickets via BFI: Here. https://whatson.bfi.org.uk/Online/default.asp?BOparam::WScontent::loadArticle::permalink=werner-herzog-radical-dreamer Blu-ray & DVD Release Date: 19th February 2024 Director: Thomas von Steinaecker Cast: Werner Herzog, Lena Herzog, Tilbert Herzog, Christian Bale, Nicole Kidman, Joshua Oppenheimer, Robert Pattinson, Patti Smith, Carl Weathers, Wim Wenders, Chloe Zhao, Lucki Stipetic, Volker Schlöndorff, Lotte Eisner, Lucia Lalor, Guillermo de Oliveira, Martje Grohmann, Thomas Mauch, Paul Holdengräber, David M. Wilson, Peter Zeitlinger Running Time: 102 min Cert: 15 Trailer: Here. https://youtu.be/MISuaIHtyhU?si=78xPgye-opkRPC00 Pre-Order Blu-ray via BFI: Here. https://shop.bfi.org.uk/werner-herzog-radical-dreamer-blu-ray.html Website: Here. https://www.metfilmsales.com/werner-herzog-radical-dreamer ---------------- *(Music) 'Da Joint' (Instrumental) by EPMD - 2020 --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/eftv/message

It's been 25 years since ‘The Sopranos' premiered on HBO. After that night, television changed forever. James Gandolfini, Edie Falco, Lorraine Bracco, Michael Imperioli and the rest of the cast and crew won 21 Emmy Awards over the course of the run of the David Chase drama. Today we're remembering ‘The Sopranos' with comic Paul Palmeri. It's fun chat about the show, Italian and culture, and why Italians are so darn hot. Visit Newsweek.com to learn more about the podcasts we offer and to catch up on the latest news. While you're there, subscribe to Newsweek's ‘For the Culture newsletter. Follow H. Alan Scott on everything at @HAlanScott. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

WE recorded half an episode for you, Wes does a parent trap, and Ethan fondly recalls Joe Dirt. Edie Falco.   Review: Rye Lane Quiz (10:06): The Wedding Singer   Facebook:@WEAintSeenIt Ethan: @ethangoose.bsky.social; letterboxd: egeese Wesley: @weswee.bsky.social; letterboxd: babyweswee

On this episode of Woody Adjacent, James brings us what seemed like a great recommendation ..only to find not only disappointment but some unfortunate behind the scenes details that still lead to a great conversation regardless :)   Fools Paradise (2023) tells the story of a mute man recently released from a mental health facility. This man looks just like a famous method actor that refuses to leave his trailer on the production of a movie set. With the "help" of a down-on-his-luck 'publicist' this nameless man will begin a misadventure through the world of hollywood encountering all the strange types in the hollywood machine   The movie stars: Charlie Day, Ken Jeong, Kate Beckinsale, Adrien Brody, Jason Sudeikis, Ray Liotta and Edie Falco to name but a few   Please check out the links below for the full cast, user reviews, ratings and info you may find interesting   Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fool%27s_Paradise_(2023_film)   IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9013340/   Rotten Tomatoes: https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/fools_paradise_2023   ____________________   As promised please find the link to the podcast interview with Chalie Day here:  Let's Shoot! with Pete Chatmon - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIoWVQQiHjc   _____________________   A VERY Special Thanks to The Woody Allen Pages Website & The Woody Allen Subreddit for the continued support and info – check them out for the latest from the Woody Allen Fan Community!!   https://www.woodyallenpages.com     &    https://www.reddit.com/r/woodyallen   PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT TO THIS OR ANY OTHER EPISODE USING OUR COMMENT SECTION VIDEO LINK HERE   >>>>>>>  https://bit.ly/warpcom   IF YOU LIKE THE SHOW, PLEASE CONSIDER BUYING US A COFFEE / GIVING US A TIP VIA OUR PATREON CAMPAIGN  >>> https://www.patreon.com/woodyretro   Thanks for listening as always - we would also LOVE a review on iTunes or a 5 star rating via Spotify or whichever podcast platform you are listening on - please find all our connected links below.   >>>   https://linktr.ee/woodyretro

Noam Dworman, Dan Naturman and Periel Aschenbrand sit down with actor and comedian, Adam Ferrara.  Ferrara's multiple television appearances include the FX series Rescue Me, playing NYPD Sgt. Frank Verelli opposite Edie Falco on Showtime series Nurse Jackie, co-hosting the critically acclaimed BBC sensation US version of Top Gear and numerous others. His comedy album, It's Scary in Here, debuted number one on iTunes.

Adam Ferrara is a tremendous actor and comedian whom I've had the pleasure to know for a very long time in this business. He is known for co-hosting the BBC'S Top Gear U.S. for six seasons. He also starred on the Emmy-nominated FX drama Rescue Me with Denis Leary. He also featured on a number of episodes in the critically acclaimed Nurse Jackie starring Edie Falco. Some of his film appearances include Paul Blart: Mall Cop alongside Kevin James, Little Italy starring Emma Roberts and Hayden Christensen, and Definitely, Maybe with Ryan Reynolds. He has also made numerous guest appearances on hit shows like Criminal Minds, NCIS, and King of Queens over his long and storied career. He is also a two time nominee for the American Comedy Award for Stand-Up of the Year, has made 5 stand-up specials, and has performed for multiple U.S. senators as well as President Clinton. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/industry-standard-w-barry-katz/support

Adam Ferrara is a tremendous actor and comedian whom I've had the pleasure to know for a very long time in this business. He is known for co-hosting the BBC'S Top Gear U.S. for six seasons. He also starred on the Emmy-nominated FX drama Rescue Me with Denis Leary. He also featured on a number of episodes in the critically acclaimed Nurse Jackie starring Edie Falco. Some of his film appearances include Paul Blart: Mall Cop alongside Kevin James, Little Italy starring Emma Roberts and Hayden Christensen, and Definitely, Maybe with Ryan Reynolds. He has also made numerous guest appearances on hit shows like Criminal Minds, NCIS, and King of Queens over his long and storied career. He is also a two time nominee for the American Comedy Award for Stand-Up of the Year, has made 5 stand-up specials, and has performed for multiple U.S. senators as well as President Clinton. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/industry-standard-w-barry-katz/support

This week on Bloodhaus, Josh and Drusilla cover Abel Ferrara's 90s vampire joint, The Addiction. From wiki: “The Addiction is a 1995 American vampire horror film directed by Abel Ferrara and written by Nicholas St. John. Starring Lili Taylor, Christopher Walken, Annabella Sciorra, Edie Falco, Paul Calderón, Fredro Starr, Kathryn Erbe, and Michael Imperioli, the film follows a philosophy graduate student who is turned into a vampire after being bitten by a woman during a chance encounter on the streets of New York City. After the attack, she struggles coming to terms with her new lifestyle and begins developing an addiction for human blood. The film was shot in black-and-white and has been considered an allegory about drug addiction and the theological concept of sin.[1][2] " But first! Josh's mom is okay. Drusilla started her new job. They discuss How to Get Ahead in Advertising . Josh got to watch When a Stranger Calls Back with its star, Jill Schoelen, who was lovely. The duo discusses lost 80s slasher films made near Big Bear like Edge of the Axe, Satan's Blade, Girl's Night Out, Pledge Night, Sorority Massacre 2, and Slumber Party Massacre 2. Drusilla saw Barbie. Josh and Drusilla talk about Lena Dunham's Polly Pocket and all the other upcoming Mattel films. Also discussed or mentioned: Ms .45, King of New York, Bad Lieutenant, Body Snatchers, The Sopranos, Lili Taylor, Edie Falco, Michael Imperioli, ethical relativism, Julien Schnabel, AA, Sid & Nancy, The Habit, Light Sleeper, Dracula (1992), Fright Night, My Best Friend is a Vampire, Near Dark, The Craft, the films of 1995, The Net, and Dennis Miller.  NEXT WEEK: Nanny (2022) Website: http://www.bloodhauspod.comTwitter: https://twitter.com/BloodhausPodInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/bloodhauspod/Email: bloodhauspod@gmail.comDrusilla's art: https://www.sisterhydedesign.com/Drusilla's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hydesister/ Drusilla's Letterboxd: https://letterboxd.com/drew_phillips/Joshua's website: https://www.joshuaconkel.com/Joshua's Twitter: https://twitter.com/JoshuaConkelJoshua's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/joshua_conkel/Joshua's Letterboxd: https://letterboxd.com/joshuaconkel 

In this episode of the Oh Brother podcast, Dan and Mike discuss Avatar: The Way of Water, the sequel to Avatar (2009).Avatar: The Way of Water is an epic science fiction film directed and produced by James Cameron. It was released in the United States on December 16, 2022.Starring Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldaña, Stephen Lang, Joel David Moore, CCH Pounder, Sigourney Weaver, Edie Falco, Brendan Cowell, Cliff Curtis, Kate Winslet, Matt Gerald, Giovanni Ribisi, Sileep Rao, etc.Hope you guys enjoy it! @ohbrotherpodcast #podcast #avatar #avatarthewayofwater #jamescameronActress Karissa Lee Staples Oh Brother Podcast: Subscribe on YouTube Listen on all podcast platforms Follow us on Twitter & Instagram Leave a 5-star rating/review on Apple Podcasts

Today's Sponsor: The Chess Storehttps://thisistheconversationproject.com/thechessstore Today's Rundown:Joey Chestnut shakes off rain delay and defends title at Nathan's Fourth of July hot dog contesthttps://t.co/eH7RZt12NX Fireworks explosion kills 1, injures 9 others in Michiganhttps://t.co/FvIv2p0y2T 'Rogers: The Musical,' first Marvel musical at Disneyland openshttps://t.co/Hm84E55AMj Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton will not testify at his impeachment trial, attorney sayshttps://t.co/TKCbOijs1C Netflix closing in on $50 million Jerry Jones docuserieshttps://t.co/1UvIj0I387 Suspicious powder found at the White House when Biden was gone was cocaine, AP sources sayhttps://t.co/EwGpkyg1x4 Shania Twain wipes out onstage during Chicago concerthttps://t.co/IYHEnH2KyB Creator Clash 2, an influencer-run boxing event, failed to raise money for charities, organizer sayshttps://t.co/XZT6ZIfSIF Website: http://thisistheconversationproject.com Facebook: http://facebook.com/thisistheconversationproject Twitter: http://twitter.com/th_conversation TikTok: http://tiktok.com/@theconversationproject YouTube: http://thisistheconversationproject.com/youtube Podcast: http://thisistheconversationproject.com/podcasts #yournewssidepiece #coffeechat #morningnews July 5 BirthdaysHuey Lewis (73)Edie Falco (60)Megan Rapinoe (38) Today In History1937: Spam, the luncheon meat, was introduced into the market by the Hormel Foods Corporation.1946: The bikini was introduced in Paris, France.1989: The sitcom Seinfeld aired its first episode. PLUS, TODAY WE CELEBRATE: Apple Turnover Day https://www.google.com/search?q=Apple+Turnover+Day&oq=Apple+Turnover+Day&aqs=chrome..69i57j0i22i30l9.167j1j4&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

"Who's Your Band?" Podcast Episode 123! Comedians Jeffrey Paul and Sean Morton with special guest, from the hit TV Show "Bupkis," actor James A DeSimone!On this week's episode of "Who's Your Band," we welcome on, from the hit TV show "Bupkis," actor James A DeSimone, aka "Crillz!" We find out what its like to be Pete Davidson's best friend on and off-air, what it's like working on set, and working with this star cast of Joe Pesci, Edie Falco, and Ray Romano. We talk about James' fascinating story, and so much more on this episode of Who's Your Band!

Chris and Taylor review the American comedy drama television series, Bupkis, which was written by Pete Davidson (who also acted as producer), Judah Miller and Dave Sirus.  show is  a "heightened fictionalized version of Pete Davidson's life". After moving back home to Staten Island, Pete struggles to deal with unfortunate family news, all the while trying to maintain his career, relationships and mental health in an increasingly surreal and heightened world of his own making. The series stars Pete Davidson, Joe Pesci, Edie Falco, Brad Garrett, Phillip Ettinger, Bobby Cannavale, Oona Roche, Chase Sui Wonders, Shane Gillis, Derek Gaines, Dave Sirus and Ray Romano Follow us on:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepotentialpodcast/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thepotentialpodcastTwitter: https://twitter.com/thepotentialpodSupport us on Patreon:patreon.com/thepotentialpodcastThanks to our sponsor:  BetterHelpBetterHelp: Get 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp by going to https://betterhelp.com/potential ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Guest: Comedy Writer Dave Sirus, creator of the new sitcom Bupkis starring Pete Davidson, Joe Pesci and Edie Falco which began streaming today on Peacock, gives us an update on the WGA strike. David explains how America punishes the weak, and rewards cruelty. Most success has less to do with talent or hard work and more to do with sharp elbows, cheating and enjoying the suffering of others. Chapters: 00:00 David does The News 08:04 Comedy Writer Dave Sirus SUBSCRIBE TO DAVID'S NEWSLETTER:  Take David wherever you go by subscribing to this show as a podcast! Here's how: . And Subscribe to this channel. DONATE TO THIS SHOW:  . More David @ 

Actress Edie Falco discusses her journey with sobriety, finding peace with Buddhism, playing Pete Davidson's mother in their new series Bupkis, and her hardest role to date: being a single parent to her two kids.

 Meg Wolitzer presents three provocative works about rituals that reshape and define their characters. In “oh she gotta head fulla hair,” by Ntozake Shange, a woman's attention to her hair consumes her life. The reader is Tamara Tunie. In “Half a Day,” by Naguib Mahfouz, performed by Bruce Altman, time collapses and a lifetime goes by in a flash. And in Charles Baxter's “Fenstad's Mother,” a mother and son rehearse old patterns and find new ones. The reader is Edie Falco.

Welcome to our AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER movie review with FULL SPOILERS!!! We are joined by Joe Stark (StarkCast) and Paul Hart (Cinedudes) as we rate and review the 2nd entry in James Cameron's science fiction fantasy. Did Avatar 2 blow us away with the story or was it just another attempt at wowing us with visual effects? We also have theories for future installments of the franchise. Set more than a decade after the events of the first film, “Avatar: The Way of Water” begins to tell the story of the Sully family (Jake, Neytiri, and their kids), the trouble that follows them, the lengths they go to keep each other safe, the battles they fight to stay alive, and the tragedies they endure. Directed by James Cameron and produced by Cameron and Jon Landau, the film stars Zoe Saldana, Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, Cliff Curtis, Joel David Moore, CCH Pounder, Edie Falco, Jemaine Clement and Kate Winslet. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

THE GEEK BUDDIES LIVE SPOILER REVIEW FOR AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER!After a 13 year hiatus, JAMES CAMERON is back with his brand new film AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER, a sequel to 2009's AVATAR. The film sees the return of SAM WORTHINGTON, ZOE SALDAÑA, SIGOURNEY WEAVER, and STEPHEN LANG. The new cast joining the Avatar universe includes KATE WINSLET, CLIFF CURTIS, EDIE FALCO, JACK CHAMPION, BRITAIN DALTON, and JERMAINE CLEMENT.The Geek Buddies aka John Rocha, Michael Vogel, and Shannon McClung discuss all the story, script, acting, direction, action sequences and more in this spoiler review.CHAPTERS:0:00 Avatar: The Way of Water Overall Thoughts and Lo'ak's Journey19:02 Jake and Neytiri's Storyline, Quaritch's Return and Spider, and Ronal and Tonawari's Storyline46:56 Themes of Family and Symbolism, Lo'ak and Payakan, Kiri, Eywa and Grace1:02:48 Action Sequences, Streamlabs and Superchats, Final Thoughts____________________

The gang went to see AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER and we all got soaking wet. Fully submerged. Drenched! We're communing with space whales, chugging coffees with Edie Falco, and learning how to hold our breath for long stretches of time to commemorate the release of James Cameron's long-awaited sequel to the biggest movie of all time. Are we one with Eywa now? How does Kate Winslet's Na'vi accent stack up against her previous linguistic efforts? Is the Regal Cinemas Agave Aquarita the perfect cocktail to accompany your trip back to Pandora? Will Marie end up buying the Lego “Home Tree” set, or is that too complicated for the crew? This episode is sponsored by: Bombas (bombas.com/check CODE: CHECK) Shopify (shopify.com/check) DadGrass (dadgrass.com/check) Plus, check out the Slow Xmas 2022 holiday music compilation now on Spotify and Bandcamp! Please support the bands/artists featured on this album. Nicky Francis Spotify Apple Music Soundcloud Gravity Proof Spotify Apple Music Bandcamp YouTube Instagram Greeensleeves Spotify Apple Music Bandcamp Instagram Heavy Gus Spotify Apple Music Bandcamp YouTube Website Instagram TikTok Facebook Evan Kertman Spotify Apple Music Bandcamp Bandcamp (Ben Varian) Website (Miles Wintner) Instagram Instagram (Ben Varian) Join our Patreon at patreon.com/blankcheck Follow us @blankcheckpod on Twitter and Instagram! Buy some real nerdy merch at shopblankcheckpod.myshopify.com or at teepublic.com/stores/blank-check