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16 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
3 episodes with raising daughters
2 episodes with raising daughters
Allie interviews Nick Freitas, ex-Green Beret and Virginia delegate, to unpack biblical masculinity's crisis in the church and in culture. He exposes weak leadership, urges men to reclaim strength through Christ, and shares about raising sons and daughters using scripture's wisdom. He also explains the difference between Andrew Tate and the manosphere versus true, Christian masculinity. Join us to revive godly manhood, disciple boldly, and honor God's design in family and faith. Buy Allie's book "Toxic Empathy: How Progressives Exploit Christian Compassion": https://www.toxicempathy.com/ --- Timecodes: Pre-Born — Will you help rescue babies' lives? Donate by calling #250 & say keyword 'BABY' or go to Preborn.com/ALLIE. Seven Weeks Coffee — Experience the best coffee while supporting the pro-life movement with Seven Weeks Coffee; use code ALLIE at https://www.sevenweekscoffee.com to save up to 25% off your first order, plus your free gift! --- Buy Allie's book "You're Not Enough (& That's Okay): Escaping the Toxic Culture of Self-Love": https://alliebethstuckey.com/book Relatable merchandise – use promo code "ALLIE10" for a discount: https://shop.blazemedia.com/collections/allie-stuckey (0:00) Intro(4:04) Christian Masculinity(8:19) Why Men Follow Andrew Tate(16:51) Meekness vs Weakness(22:21) Christian Fatherhood(31:33) Raising Sons vs Raising Daughters(40:20) The Price of Running for Office---Today's SponsorsSend a taste of home this holiday season with Keksi — soft, thick, handcrafted cookies made with the best ingredients. Keksi ships nationwide! Order yours at keksi.com with code ALLIE15 for 15% off.Good Ranchers — Go to https://GoodRanchers.com and subscribe to any box (but preferably the Allie Beth Stuckey Box) to get free Wagyu burgers, hot dogs, bacon, or chicken wings in every box for life. Plus, you'll get $40 off when you use code ALLIE at checkout.A'del — Try A'del's hand-crafted, artisan, small-batch cosmetics and use promo code ALLIE 25% off your first time purchase at https://AdelNaturalCosmetics.comNetSuite — Gain visibility and control of your financials, planning, budgeting, and inventory so you can manage risk, get reliable forecasts, and improve margins. Go to NetSuite.com/ALLIE to get the CFO's guide to AI and Machine Learning. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
TODAY'S LESSONYou're not just raising girls; you're shaping generations. The loudest sermons your daughters will ever hear are the ones they watch you live—how you talk about people in private, how you handle disappointment, how you return to the Word when emotions run hot. Proverbs tells us, “Train up a child in the way he should go.” (22:6). Training isn't lecturing; it's modeling and practicing—repeatedly.Give them language for God's presence: “Let's ask Jesus together.” Turn anxiety moments into prayer labs. Let them catch you worshiping when no one's watching. Read Scripture at the table and ask questions that spark discovery: “What does this show us about God? What can we obey today?” Celebrate obedience more than performance. Correct with dignity, not shaming. Give them a vision for femininity that is strong, holy, and joy-filled—not reactionary to culture, but radiant under King Jesus.And for spiritual daughters—young women in your church or circle—offer mentorship. Invite them to serve beside you. Tell them stories of God's faithfulness. Give them opportunities to lead and fail forward in safety. Daughters rise when mothers and mentors lift.
TODAY'S LESSONYou're not just raising girls; you're shaping generations. The loudest sermons your daughters will ever hear are the ones they watch you live—how you talk about people in private, how you handle disappointment, how you return to the Word when emotions run hot. Proverbs tells us, “Train up a child in the way he should go.” (22:6). Training isn't lecturing; it's modeling and practicing—repeatedly.Give them language for God's presence: “Let's ask Jesus together.” Turn anxiety moments into prayer labs. Let them catch you worshiping when no one's watching. Read Scripture at the table and ask questions that spark discovery: “What does this show us about God? What can we obey today?” Celebrate obedience more than performance. Correct with dignity, not shaming. Give them a vision for femininity that is strong, holy, and joy-filled—not reactionary to culture, but radiant under King Jesus.And for spiritual daughters—young women in your church or circle—offer mentorship. Invite them to serve beside you. Tell them stories of God's faithfulness. Give them opportunities to lead and fail forward in safety. Daughters rise when mothers and mentors lift.
"Mayor of Kingstown" cast Jeremy Renner and Edie Falco join Drew Barrymore to get candid about their experiences as parents and how it feels to watch your children pull away from you as they get older. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Courage is not the absence of fear—it's choosing faith in the midst of fear. In this week's episode of the Raising Godly Girls Podcast, American Heritage Girls Executive Director and host Rachael Culpepper sits down with award-winning children's author and content creator Kirthana Fanning to talk about raising daughters who have the courage to overcome life's obstacles. Kirthana brings years of experience as a writer, producer, and the creator of Read Believe Grow TV, a YouTube channel dedicated to helping children encounter God's truth in engaging ways. In this conversation, she shares her passion for crafting faith-filled stories that equip the next generation with courage and resilience—qualities that girls desperately need in a culture that often tells them to shrink back or compromise their faith. Through her beloved children's book The Girl and Her Noble Steed, Kirthana paints a picture of bravery rooted in God's promises. She and Rachael explore why courage must be understood through a Biblical lens, the unique challenges girls face today in standing boldly for their faith, and how parents can guide their daughters toward resilience by leaning on the truth of Scripture rather than cultural trends. Scripture Referenced in This Episode: Joshua 1:9 — “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Isaiah 41:10 — God strengthens and upholds His people. 2 Timothy 1:7 — “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” Esther 4:14 — Courage to stand boldly “for such a time as this.” Psalm 27:1 — “The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear?” This episode will encourage you, as a mom, to see the everyday moments of parenting as opportunities to nurture bravery in your daughter's heart. You'll walk away inspired to help her embrace a faith that stands firm in the face of fear—trusting that with God's help, she can overcome every obstacle in her path. To learn more about Kirthana Fanning and her books, visit kirthanajfanning.com. Explore more resources to raise girls rooted in Christ at raisinggodlygirls.com. To find or start an AHG Troop in your area, visit americanheritagegirls.org.
Who is responsible for teaching daughters how to treat men, parents, culture, or experience? In this episode of the You Are Dope Podcast, we explore respect, balance, and whether chivalry is alive in today's generation. This conversation goes beyond parenting into the bigger lessons shaping modern relationships.#YouAreDopePodcast #RaisingDaughters #Chivalry #ModernLove #HealthyRelationships #LifeCoachATL #DopeDadsShowUp
This conversation is a deep breath and a practical roadmap for a time when parenting has become so challening. Bestselling author Kari Kampakis (mom of four girls) joins Ginny to share what truly equips daughters for today's pressures—friendship shifts, online comparison, dating drama, and the “conformity engine” that can steal childhood wonder. Kari's hope-forward framework is simple and memorable: use the drip-drip-drip approach to big topics, teach girls to cast a wide net socially, and help them leave relationships with dignity. You'll hear why urgency often backfires, how to avoid the “bitter barn,” and how to plant short, sticky phrases your daughter will actually remember. Explore more of Kari's work here: karikampakis.com and her new book Is Your Daughter Ready? 10 Ways to Empower Your Girl for an Age of New Challenges here. This episode balances heart and horsepower. You'll get language for hard moments (including party safety, peer pressure, and tech boundaries), plus the comforting truth that seeds you've planted can't be unplanted. If you're parenting a girl—from elementary through college—this one is equal parts perspective shift and playbook. Share it with a friend who needs encouragement today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
TheWanderingPaddy Poetry - The Book of Truths. Out Now on Amazon. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
பெண் பிள்ளை வளர்ப்பில் இஸ்லாம் காட்டும் வழிமுறைகள்மவ்லவி அன்ஸார் ஹுஸைன் ஃபிர்தௌஸி | Ansar Hussain Firdousi21-08-2025Al-Jubail Dawah Center, Jubail
Join Eric and Kevin on this episode of Legacy Makers as they share heartfelt insights into the unique parenting challenges and joys of raising daughters. From modeling healthy relationships to offering affirmation and emotional support, they emphasize the lasting impact fathers have on their daughters’ confidence and self-worth. Discover how they balance protection with independence and adapt their parenting styles for sons and daughters alike. Packed with practical advice and thoughtful discussion, this episode is your guide to fostering strong father-daughter relationships and empowering the next generation. Don’t miss it—tune in now to start building your legacy. Chapters 00:00 Navigating the Challenges of Parenting Daughters03:10 The Importance of Affirmation and Validation05:56 Empowering Daughters Through Confidence08:50 Modeling Healthy Relationships12:02 Engagement and Emotional Support14:53 The Role of Dads in Shaping Identity18:10 Balancing Protection and Independence20:56 Advice for New Dads of DaughtersSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“I became an Indigenous status member around 35, and that's when I started to really appreciate my identity. I'm very thankful for it now seeing my daughters who are a quarter Indigenous, a quarter German, and half Chinese, growing up and not struggling with that identity at school.”In this week's episode of 2 Dads 1 Car, we speak with Thomas Claus, husband of a good friend of mine, and father to three young daughters.In our conversation, Thomas begins by discussing his intersectional experiences growing up half-German, half-Indigenous, and how navigating his identity through childhood has both allowed him to take a more thoughtful approach to his growth as a person, and to his children's growth and cultural journey today. On the parenting front, Thomas speaks about the collaborative nature of effective parenting with his wife, and about striking the correct balances when we speak about love, discipline, and leadership. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of the podcast! For our latest updates, please check out @2dads1car on Instagram, or our website at 2dads1car.com. I hope you love this episode!Credits:Podcast Guest: Thomas ClausPodcast Host: Steven NgoPodcast Producer: Baron Hsueh
The Dad Edge Podcast (formerly The Good Dad Project Podcast)
Have you ever asked yourself: Do I create a safe, judgment-free environment where my kids can come to me with their awkward questions? Am I making time for one-on-one connection with my kids, so these tough conversations can happen more naturally? What steps am I taking to protect my kids from online exposure, and is there more I could be doing? Navigating “the talk” about sex and sexuality is a daunting task for dads everywhere — and it never seems to get less awkward. Today, Larry sits down with renowned author and communicator Jim Burns to break down how dads can lead the way in guiding their kids through conversations about sex, porn, and growing up in a digital world. Larry and Jim dive deep into the realities of "the talk"—why it never quite stops feeling awkward, and why that awkwardness can actually be a gateway to genuine connection with our kids. They explore why our own discomfort shouldn't keep us from being the voices our children trust to learn about relationships, intimacy, and sexual integrity—especially when the internet and social media are more than willing to fill in any gaps we leave. You'll hear practical strategies for navigating these conversations, including how to replace a single, intimidating “talk” with hundreds of approachable one-minute chats, ways to demystify topics like pornography and online safety, and tips for tailoring discussions to your child's unique personality. If you want to raise confident kids who learn about sex and relationships from you—and not from TikTok or YouTube—this episode is packed with clarity, courage, and actionable advice to help you step up, again and again, in those crucial parenting moments. Become the best husband you can: https://bit.ly/deamarriageyoutube In this vital conversation, we dig into: Embracing Awkwardness: Jim Burns shares that awkward isn't the enemy—it's actually a doorway to true connection. If your head sweats or you stammer, congratulations, you're doing it right! From One “Talk” to 100 Conversations: The secret? Don't stress the big performance. Focus on hundreds of one-minute check-ins and question invites over time. Navigating Porn & Tech: In today's world, our kids' go-to source for sex education is often the internet. Jim breaks down how early and often these conversations need to happen—and why holding off on full-on smartphones can give your kids a real edge. What If You're Still Sorting Out Your Own Stuff: If you're struggling with sexual integrity or have a messy past, don't sit silently. Your honesty and process can become a powerful guide for your children. This episode reminds us that showing up with intention, compassion, and consistency is what really matters. Here's what research and observation highlight about parental involvement in sex education: Studies show that 70% of teens report accidentally or intentionally encountering online pornography, Studies show that ongoing, bite-sized conversations are up to 50% more effective in retention and behavioral outcomes compared to single, formal discussions. Studies found that teens who receive sex education from their parents are 24% less likely to engage in risky sexual behavior compared to those who learn primarily from peers or media https://thedadedge.com/537 thedadedge.com/bark thedadedge.com/alliance https://homeword.com/ @drjimburns @homewordcenter
Clinical psychologist and the author of the award-winning book, Sexism & Sensibility: Raising Empowered, Resilient Girls in the Modern World on healthy entitlement for girls, how to recognize and combat sexism in our own parenting, how to talk about misogyny, stereotyping, objectification, and consent with kids of all ages and much more. LINKS AND RESOURCES Support the podcast by making a donation (suggested amount $15) 732-763-2576 call to leave a voicemail. info@authenticparenting.com Send audio messages using Speakpipe. Join the Authentic Parenting Community on Facebook. Work w/Anna. Listeners get 10% off her services.
Today's Success is Subjective guest is Dr. Tim Jordan. Dr. Jordan is a Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrician with over 30 years of experience helping girls ages 5–25 navigate the challenges of growing up. Inspired by his five younger sisters, he developed a unique ability to connect with girls and went on to train under renowned pediatrician Dr. T. Berry Brazelton at Harvard. He's the founder of Camp Weloki for Girls and leads retreats and school programs that empower girls to build confidence, resilience, and self-awareness. Dr. Jordan is the author of several parenting and self-help books, including Sleeping Beauties, Awakened Women and She Leads. His podcast Raising Daughters offers weekly insights on mindset, identity, family culture, and emotional health. He's sitting down with Joanna to share with all of you listeners some of the wisdom he has gained over many years as not only a parent himself, but as an expert parenting coach and girls' development specialist. Dr. Jordan's Resources:Raising Daughters Podcasthttps://drtimjordan.com/Connect with Joanna Lilley Therapeutic Consulting AssociationLilley Consulting WebsiteLilley Consulting on Facebook Lilley Consulting on YouTubeEmail joanna@lilleyconsulting.com#TherapeuticConsulting #LilleyConsulting #Successful #YoungAdults #TherapeuticPrograms #Therapy #MentalHealthMatters #Podcast #PodcastCommunity #StudentMentalHealth #TheJourney #SuccessIsSubjectivePodcast #TheUnpavedRoad #PFCAudioVideo #SelfEsteem #ParentingAdvice #ParentingTeens #FailureToLaunch #LeavingTheNest #SuccessfullAdults #CampWelokiForGirls #StrongGirlsStrongWorld #DrTimJordan #ParentingAdvice #RaisingDaughters #RaisingDaughtersPodcast
In today's world, raising confident, faith-rooted daughters can feel overwhelming. Parents often struggle to guide their girls toward a faith that's truly their own—especially amid the noise of culture, peer pressure, and internal insecurity. How do we parent with purpose and help our daughters build their identity on something unshakeable?About the Guest:Nellie Harden is a wife, mother of four daughters, trauma survivor, family life and leadership coach, and passionate advocate for raising girls with a strong foundation of worth, esteem, and confidence. With a background that spans from studying humpback whales to human behavior, Nellie brings a unique and deeply insightful lens to parenting and leadership. She is the author of 40 Scriptures & Conversations to Have When Raising Daughters and No Problem Parenting Book. When she's not coaching or writing, she's off adventuring with her husband and four daughters—her #happyharden crew.Key Takeaways:Your daughter's faith can't be forced—but it can be formed through how you model your own dependence on JesusThe first 6570 days of a child's life are critical for shaping her identity, values, and confidenceA parent's role isn't to prevent every mistake, but to provide a safe, Christ-centered foundation where daughters can grow and return to truthScripture and guided conversations are powerful tools for navigating modern challenges in parenting girlsParents need support too—and building your own foundation of worth and purpose is just as vitalHow This Helps You:If you've ever wondered how to lead your daughter toward owning her own faith instead of simply mimicking yours, this conversation is for you. Nellie's wisdom will challenge, encourage, and equip you to have intentional faith-building conversations, model dependence on Jesus, and steward your daughter's heart during the most formative years of her life.Our All the Best Devotional will help you connect with Jesus and find peace and restoration. Through guided reflection on the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10, you'll gain insight into how to overcome distractions, worry, comparison, and more. Connect with Nellie: WebsiteFollow Willow: Website | Instagram | Facebook
Hey Dads…Today on The Dad Whisperer Podcast I'm joined by my dear friend, LeeAnn Mancini. She is a powerful influencer and educator (who was just awarded an honorary doctorate for her lifelong investment in students and parents), and she is pouring her wisdom into you as fathers so you're even more equipped to lead your daughters to follow Christ. If you're ready to grow as a spiritual leader, you will definitely want to tune in to this powerful conversation.
We welcome back Pete Hixson for his third appearance. Together, we explore the complexities of balancing ambition, family, faith, and mentorship. We discuss the pivotal moments that have shaped Pete's life and career and delve into the challenges of being a driven professional while remaining a present and supportive family man. This episode offers a wealth of advice for young fathers, professionals, and anyone navigating the intricate dynamics of career and family life.CHAPTERS:00:56 StoryBrand and Business Growth02:27 Personal Reflections and Mentorship08:49 The Importance of Mentors19:15 Shifting from Success to Significance30:03 The Role of Mission in Life39:05 Being a Noticer in Relationships46:52 Navigating Relationship Changes with Kids54:00 Driven Individuals and Life Balance59:24 Driven vs. Content: A Personal Reflection01:05:37 Parenting and Legacy01:11:24 Raising Daughters with Different Needs01:23:46 The Birth of Beyond Communities01:30:55 Current Progress and Future PlansBecome a BPN member FOR FREE - Unlock 20% off FOR LIFEhttps://bpn.team/member FOLLOW:IG: instagram.com/nickbarefitness/YT: youtube.com/@nickbarefitness
In this episode of The Balancing Act, host Sarah Sheridan interviews Kate Dohaney, the global CEO of Orb Group and mom to two. Kate shares her unique path from performing artist to executive leader, detailing her transition through the music industry, advertising, and major roles at The Wall Street Journal and NewsCorp. She emphasizes the importance of resilience, being data-driven, and the power of surrounding oneself with the right people. Kate also discusses the challenges and rewards of balancing a high-powered career with motherhood, offering motivating insights for aspiring female leaders. Tune in for an inspiring conversation about career evolution, leadership, and family.
In this Father's Day message from Trace Church in Colorado Springs, Pastor Aaron continues our series through the book of 1 Peter with a focus on chapter 3. This sermon speaks directly to the heart of biblical manhood, marriage, leadership, and identity.Learn what Scripture says about the roles of husbands and wives, and how real strength and beauty come from character, not culture. Whether you're a father, husband, wife, or daughter, this message will encourage and challenge you to live with purpose and conviction.Recorded live at Trace Church, this teaching reminds us that when men step into their God-given responsibility, families and communities change for the better.Listen now and be encouraged.Father's Day Sermon, Trace Church Colorado Springs, 1 Peter 3, Christian Marriage, Biblical Fatherhood, Godly Men, Christian Parenting, Men's Ministry, Spiritual Leadership, Inner Beauty Bible, Colorado Churches, Pastor Aaron, Trace Church Podcast, Father's Day Message 2025, Christian Husband and Wife Roles, Raising Daughters in Faith
Does it get more "meta" than interviewing your own parent about parenting? For our Father's Day 2025 Special, Adam Flaherty goes deep with a truly special and personal guest: his own father. Tom Flaherty isn't just Adam's dad; he's a father of four (spanning 20 years in age!), an Air Force veteran, a retired police officer, and an inspiration and beacon of hope to many people recovering from alcohol addiction. In a first for the show, Adam and his dad get real about raising kids across two generations, building resilience through tough times, and the evolving role of fathers over the decades. After the interview, Marc and Adam tackle the wild world of kids' slang in a gut-busting So That's a Thing Now about the cringeworthy phrases their children have brought home.LINKSWhat Does It Mean To Be a Modern Dad (article by Adam)Mom's Guide to Finding Herself PodcastStorypillar PodcastCaspar BabypantsSpencer AlbeeModern Dadhood (website)AdamFlaherty.tvStuffed Animal (Marc's kids' music)MD (Instagram)MD (Facebook)MD (YouTube)MD (TikTok) #moderndadhood #fatherhood #parenthood #parenting #parentingpodcast #dadding #dadpodcast
Check out this week's episode of Leadership Now with Dr. Aaron Rock where Aaron invites his daughters onto the show to discuss some highs, lows and lessons learned from their childhood through to their adult years. More Resources: More resources at beachheadmedia.ca Beachhead Media YouTube
Check out this week's episode of Leadership Now with Dr. Aaron Rock where Aaron invites his daughters onto the show to discuss some highs, lows and lessons learned from their childhood through to their adult years. More Resources: More resources at beachheadmedia.ca Beachhead Media YouTube
Check out this week's episode of Leadership Now with Dr. Aaron Rock where Aaron invites his daughters onto the show to discuss some highs, lows and lessons learned from their childhood through to their adult years. More Resources: More resources at beachheadmedia.ca Beachhead Media YouTube
Our children are God's greatest gifts. We pour into them with unconditional love, guidance and support - praying we have given them the tools to be successful in life. Yet, peer pressure, hormones, and unrealistic social expectations can undermine our best efforts. Then what?The teenage years can be challenging, especially for girls. Issues such as negative self-esteem, anxiety, depression and self-harm plague far too many young tweens and teens as they mature into adulthood.How can families support girls during these difficult times? What are the red flags indicating professional help is needed? How do we differentiate between attention-seeking behaviors and a deeper cry for help?Our guests today, Dr. Tim Jordan, and his wife, Anne, join us to share their 30-plus years of experience providing counsel and guidance to young girls, teens, college-age women and their families. Tim and Anne share a passion for this work and, as a result, are trusted national and international resources for families and health professionals working with this population. Please join us as we unpack the complexities of raising strong girls.Show Notes:Special Guests: Dr. Tim & Anne JordanDr. Jordan is a developmental and behavioral pediatrician and counselor who is also an international speaker and prolific author of six books on raising strong girls. He's the host of his podcast called Raising Daughters and the owner of Camp Weloki for Girls. He has extensive training, including a stint with T. Berry Brazelton at Children's Hospital at Harvard.Anne Jordan, R.N., is also an international speaker and the president of Children and Families, Inc. She, along with her husband, are facilitators for the Strong Girls, Strong World program. She's also a co-owner of Camp Weloki for Girls, as well as the podcast producer. ResourcesHow to Purposefully Parent with the End in Mind (article and podcast episode by Dr. Tim Jordan) https://drtimjordan.com/2023/06/parent-values-covey-family-home/Spiral of Beliefs: How Girls Can Redirect Limiting Beliefs About Themselves (Article and podcast by Dr. Tim Jordan)https://drtimjordan.com/2020/02/beliefs-self-esteem-perspective-identity-depression-trauma-bullying/Why Teens Don't Want to Grow Up (article and podcast by Dr. Tim Jordan)https://drtimjordan.com/2023/03/adulthood-teens-careers-decisions-marriage/
In this episode of the Young Dad Podcast, host Jey Young speaks with Robbie Carlson, a father of four who shares his inspiring journey from homelessness to home ownership. They discuss the importance of building strong foundations in fatherhood, maintaining faith during tough times, and the significance of small wins in life. Robbie emphasizes the need for good men in society and the role fathers play in shaping their children's expectations and values. The conversation also touches on the challenges of parenting, the transition from boyhood to manhood, and the importance of setting a good example for children.TakeawaysBuilding a strong foundation is crucial for fatherhood.Mental battles are a significant part of overcoming challenges.Small wins can lead to greater achievements in life.Every child is different and requires unique parenting approaches.Fathers play a vital role in shaping their daughters' expectations of men.Good men are essential for a healthy society.Faith can help families stay together during tough times.It's important to celebrate differences in children.Parents should be mindful of the advice they take and give.Setting a good example is key to raising responsible children.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Resilience and Fatherhood02:55 Journey from Homelessness to Home Ownership05:31 Mental Battles and Small Wins08:20 Building a Strong Family Foundation10:59 Finding Purpose in Adversity14:05 The Importance of Community and Faith16:36 Navigating Life's Challenges19:45 Creating a Supportive Environment22:37 Reflections on Personal Growth25:25 The Role of Government and Community28:21 Concluding Thoughts on Resilience and Change35:04 Navigating Convenience and Growth35:57 The Cycle of Strength and Weakness37:27 Transitioning from Boyhood to Manhood38:45 Expectations in the Workforce39:49 Building a Strong Foundation40:53 The Role of Parents in Shaping Values41:51 The Silence of Good Men43:14 Raising Daughters with High Standards44:18 Emulating Good Examples for Children46:37 The Impact of Parental Behavior48:29 Setting Boundaries with Technology50:44 The Dad Zone Begins55:33 Advice for New DadsCheck out the Website for Interactive Activity Guides, Resources, Full Transcripts, all things YDP- www.youngdadpod.com Clink the Link for YDP Deals (Joon, Forefathers &more)- https://linktr.ee/youngdadpod Want to be a guest on Young Dad Podcast? Send Jey Young a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.joinpodmatch.com/youngdadLastly consider a monetary donation to support the Pod, https://buymeacoffee.com/youngdadpod
Our children are God's greatest gifts. We pour into them with unconditional love, guidance and support - praying we have given them the tools to be successful in life. Yet, peer pressure, hormones, and unrealistic social expectations can undermine our best efforts. Then what?The teenage years can be challenging, especially for girls. Issues such as negative self-esteem, anxiety, depression and self-harm plague far too many young tweens and teens as they mature into adulthood.How can families support girls during these difficult times? What are the red flags indicating professional help is needed? How do we differentiate between attention-seeking behaviors and a deeper cry for help?Our guests today, Dr. Tim Jordan, and his wife, Anne, join us to share their 30-plus years of experience providing counsel and guidance to young girls, teens, college-age women and their families. Tim and Anne share a passion for this work and, as a result, are trusted national and international resources for families and health professionals working with this population. Please join us as we unpack the complexities of raising strong girls.Show Notes:Special Guests: Dr. Tim & Anne JordanDr. Jordan is a developmental and behavioral pediatrician and counselor who is also an international speaker and prolific author of six books on raising strong girls. He's the host of his podcast called Raising Daughters and the owner of Camp Weloki for Girls. He has extensive training, including a stint with T. Berry Brazelton at Children's Hospital at Harvard.Anne Jordan, R.N., is also an international speaker and the president of Children and Families, Inc. She, along with her husband, are facilitators for the Strong Girls, Strong World program. She's also a co-owner of Camp Weloki for Girls, as well as the podcast producer. ResourcesHow to Purposefully Parent with the End in Mind (article and podcast episode by Dr. Tim Jordan) https://drtimjordan.com/2023/06/parent-values-covey-family-home/Spiral of Beliefs: How Girls Can Redirect Limiting Beliefs About Themselves (Article and podcast by Dr. Tim Jordan)https://drtimjordan.com/2020/02/beliefs-self-esteem-perspective-identity-depression-trauma-bullying/Why Teens Don't Want to Grow Up (article and podcast by Dr. Tim Jordan)https://drtimjordan.com/2023/03/adulthood-teens-careers-decisions-marriage/
In a culture saturated with self-promotion, curated perfection, and constant affirmation-seeking, today's girls are told to chase confidence, success, and identity through worldly means. But what happens when those shifting standards leave them feeling empty, rather than empowered? On this episode of the Raising Godly Girls Podcast, special weekend host Rachael Culpepper sits down with Larry Stephens of I Am Second to explore how fathers can help their daughters reject the “me first” messages of culture and embrace a Christ-centered identity that endures. Larry brings a wealth of experience from his work in media, sports, and entertainment—industries that deeply shape how girls view themselves. From his global outreach with the Jesus Animation Film Project to his innovative ministry in college gaming spaces, Larry offers a unique perspective on what it takes to connect with the next generation in meaningful, transformative ways. In this heartfelt conversation, he shares how dads can be the steady, truth-speaking voices their daughters desperately need. Whether your daughter is struggling with self-worth, identity, or the social media pressure to be “enough,” this episode is packed with practical encouragement. Larry and Rachael dive into real-world strategies for discipleship within the home, how to speak life over your daughter, and what it means to truly put Christ first as a family. Fathers may feel unequipped or like they've missed the moment—but Larry reminds us it's never too late to begin the work of intentional, faith-driven parenting. Don't miss this inspiring and convicting conversation that speaks to the heart of every parent raising girls in today's challenging world. Subscribe to the Raising Godly Girls Podcast and share this episode with the dads and mentors in your life who are called to lead the next generation to live second—because Christ must always come first. Find an American Heritage Girls Troop near you, visit americanheritagegirls.org Add even more Biblical wisdom to your parenting quiver, visit raisinggodlygirls.com
Welcome back, men! This episode kicks off a two-part series, starting with daughters and followed by a focus on sons. If you're a dad of girls, whether young or grown, these principles will help you reflect God's heart and guide your daughter with wisdom.--The PursueGOD Men's podcast helps guys apply God's Word to their lives to become full circle followers of Jesus. Join us for a new men's episode every other Thursday. Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/men.Learn more about "full circle" Christianity through our 12-week Pursuit series.Click here to learn more about how to use these resources with men and boys at church.Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at podcast@pursueGOD.org.Donate Now --Raising Daughters: A Father's Role in Shaping Her Identity and FaithBeing a father to a daughter is both a gift and a calling. In a culture that often blurs gender roles and redefines family dynamics, dads have the opportunity—and responsibility—to model biblical love, identity, and leadership. 1. Love Her Mom WellOne of the most important ways a father can influence his daughter is through the way he loves her mother. Whether you're married to her mom or co-parenting after divorce, your behavior sets a powerful tone in her life.The Bible calls men to love their wives sacrificially, the way Christ loves the Church:Ephesians 5:25-29 (NLT)“For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her… Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.”This kind of love is not based on feelings—it's based on commitment, humility, and servant leadership. When your daughter sees you lay down your preferences to honor and serve her mom, she internalizes what to expect from a future husband. She learns to value healthy love and recognize unhealthy behavior.Even if you're a single dad, you can still live out this principle. Show respect for your daughter's mother. Avoid speaking negatively about her, especially in front of your daughter. Be honest when appropriate, but always take the high road. God can redeem even the most broken family dynamics when you commit to modeling grace and truth.1 Peter 3:7 (NLT) adds another layer:“In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding… She is your equal partner in God's gift of new life.”Treating your wife—or your daughter's mom—with honor is one of the greatest gifts you can give your daughter.2. Speak Her Love LanguageEvery child is wired to receive love differently, and girls especially need consistent, heartfelt affirmation from their fathers. Author Gary Chapman outlines five “love languages” that help decode how people give and receive love: words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, gifts, and physical touch.Your daughter likely leans into one or two of these. Your job is to learn what speaks most clearly to her heart and make it a regular part of your relationship.Words of Affirmation – Tell her what you love about who she is, not just what she does. Be mindful of criticism—it cuts deeper in daughters who thrive on verbal encouragement.Quality Time – Let her choose the activity. The goal is not what you do together, but that you're fully present.Acts of
In this episode, Oscar welcomes Tyler McAdams from Inspiring Father. They dive deep into the journey of fatherhood, discussing the challenges and growth of being a dad, particularly to daughters. Tyler shares his personal experiences, including the impact of his childhood on his parenting style, the importance of self-development, and the balancing act of maintaining relationships while focusing on fatherhood. With insights on navigating fatherhood after a divorce and the significance of being present in children's lives, this episode is a heartfelt exploration of modern fatherhood. Join the conversation for valuable advice and inspiration for all dads aiming to thrive grow, and be the hero in their children's lives.00:00 Introduction to the Daughter Podcast00:54 Welcoming Tyler McAdams01:37 Tyler's Journey and Fatherhood Insights03:33 Challenges and Triumphs in Parenting04:40 The Importance of Being Present06:25 Emotional Growth and Parenting07:54 Balancing Relationships and Fatherhood12:25 Reflecting on Early Fatherhood20:56 Balancing Fatherhood and Marriage22:41 The Importance of Self-Development24:44 Challenges and Growth in Relationships26:36 Fitness and Mental Health29:29 Authenticity and Accountability34:29 Parenting and Hypocrisy38:32 Closing Thoughts and Social MediaDaughtered On the WebOscar on InstagramFew Will Hunt. 10% OFF use GIRLDADSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Description: In this new podcast, Dr. Jordan describes how technology and social media have caused teenagers and young adults to feel so socially awkward today. When it comes to creating close connections, girls have evolved from being scuba divers to jet skiers. They used to have in depth conversations/connection (scuba divers) to now have very little connection and racing along alone (jet skiers). Good resources on this topic:Look for Dr. Jordan's new book: Keeping Your Family Grounded When You're Flying By the Seat of Your Pants, revised and updated edition with an invaluable chapter on technologies and social media and readiness signs for both.Social Media and Technologies Books: 1) Turkle, Sherry. Alone Together2) Turkle, Sherry. Reclaiming Conversation3) Powers, William. Hamlet's Blackberry: A Practical Philosophy for Building a Good Life in the Digital Age4) Boyd, Danah. It's Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens5) McGonigal, Kelly. The Willpower Instinct6) Siegel, Daniel. Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain7) Haidt, Jonathon. The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness2 previous interviews in Raising Daughters of authors on this topic:Gabriela Nguyen gabriela@appstinent.org Appstinent app: www.appstinent.org Katherine Johnson Martinko Author of "Childhood Unplugged: How to Get Your Kid Off Screens and Find Balance"; website the analog family knmartinko@gmail.com Substack, After BabelJoin Our Community:https://www.facebook.com/DrTimJordanhttps://www.instagram.com/drtimjordan/https://www.linkedin.com/in/tim-jordan-md-79799120b/
In this special episode, I sit down with one of my favorite people—my dad—for a heartfelt conversation about fatherhood. We talk about what it was like for him raising girls, the lessons he learned along the way, and the moments that meant the most to him. He shares what he loved most about being a girl dad, the values he tried to instill, and how his own father shaped the way he parented. This episode is full of wisdom, love, laughter, and nostalgia!
Raising girls in today's world can sometimes feel hard, scary, and overwhelming. Today we're chatting with author Nellie Harden about how we can do it well by partnering with the Lord (and allowing ourselves to grow and heal in the process). This episode is packed with wisdom, practical tools, and insights such as the 3 most important things that will build a strong foundation for your daughter: worth, esteem, and confidence.No matter where you're at in your motherhood journey or relationship with your daughter, this conversation will encourage and inspire you to pursue Jesus first and foremost, and invite the girls in your life along with you!To connect with Nellie, head over to https://www.nellieharden.com!40 Scriptures & Conversations to Have When Raising Daughters: https://www.nellieharden.com/books https://www.nellieharden.com/resources THANK YOU TO THIS MONTH'S SPONSOR, Daisy Creative Co. — make growing your brand or business FUN! https://daisycreative.co SUPPORT BY WORDS: https://buymeacoffee.com/bywordsSHOP MY BOOKS:Waking Up: Living Open — https://amzn.to/3LusgrzLove Is Devotional — https://amzn.to/3S6OZhs FREE Path to Purpose Guide: https://hannahhughes.myflodesk.com/pathwaytopurpose My favorite Bible studies + devotionals - HANNAHHUGHES10 for 10% off: https://thedailygraceco.com?dt_id=300773 Connect: www.thehannahhughes.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/thehannahhughes/ https://www.instagram.com/bywordspodcast Shop my Amazon faves: https://www.amazon.com/shop/thehannahhughes
Today, Amy Lowe and Emily Alters sit down with two incredible parents who have launched their kids into adulthood and are now navigating the empty nest season—Jeff Stryker and Lynn Alters. Between them, Jeff and Lynn bring decades of parenting wisdom to the table. Both of their families have deep roots at WinShape Camps, with kids who spent summers growing up at camp and are now faithfully following Jesus in their own unique callings. These two empty nesters reflect on their parenting journeys—sharing both meaningful wins and honest missteps—and offer practical advice and encouragement for moms and dads still in the thick of it. Whether you're raising little ones or teenagers, their insight brings encouragement and perspective for the road ahead.Parenting truth we're holding onto today: You won't do everything perfectly—but being intentional, present, and Christ-centered matters more than you think.Plus: Don't miss what Jeff and Lynn are still learning—even after raising kids into adulthood.--Question of the Week: What is something I'm doing well (as a parent)? What is something I could work on (as a parent)?--Hosts: Amy Lowe & Emily AltersGuest: Lynn Alters, Jeff StrykerProducers: Emily Alters & Cody Braun--Learn more about WinShape Camps at WinShapeCamps.org!Instagram: @WinShapeCampsTikTok: @WinShapeCampsFacebook: @WinShapeCamps
In this special episode, we share one of the breakout sessions from our recent Daughters of the King event. As mothers, we experience both the joy and challenge of shaping our daughters' lives. Our personal faith deeply impacts the way we raise them, and whether we realize it or not, we are their primary role models.Through personal stories and biblical examples, Lori explores what it means to model godliness for our girls—even in the struggles, grief, and uncertainties of life. This conversation reminds us that even on the hard days, God sees us, equips us, and provides support for the journey of motherhood.Mothers as the primary role modelsBiblical examples of mothers and role modelsThe growing relationship of a mother and daughterIn this breakout session, Lori discusses:For more information and helpful resources, check our website, PerspectiveMinistries.org & follow us on Instagram @PerspectiveMinistries.
Send us a textAuthor and speaker Kari Kampakis is my guest this week and we discuss the challenges and joys of parenting. Kari is a mom of four girls and has written numerous resources for both girls and moms! Kari and I discuss the challenges and joys of motherhood, her career journey, the writing process for a devotional book, and the balance between family life and professional commitments. The conversation highlights the evolving nature of motherhood and the wisdom gained through experience. We also talk about Kari's newest book - Yours Not Hers: 40 Devotions to Stop Comparison and Love Your Life. I'm so excited for you meet Kari! Purchase Yours Not Hers: https://amzn.to/4hD9k7USuitShop! Purchase a suit or tux for less than you can rent! PROM https://shrsl.com/4utguWEDDING GROUP https://shrsl.com/4utgw Grace for the Moment for Moms- Max LucadoJesus Calling for Moms - Sarah YoungLink to purchase: https://amzn.to/3DQ8GWL BAREFACED SKINCAREwww.barefaced.comMOMMA15 for 15% off Thank you to our generous Got It From My Momma podcast friends! This episode is brought to you by: HARPER COLLINS CHRISTIAN PUBLISHING DEVOTIONS BOOKS - Grace for the Moment for Moms & Jesus Calling for Moms https://amzn.to/3DQ8GWL SUITSHOP PROM https://shrsl.com/4utgu WEDDING GROUP https://shrsl.com/4utgw CODE: GIFMM for a free tie! BAREFACED SKINCAREwww.barefaced.comUse MOMMA15 for 15% off your first purchase! TEXT a Skincare Specialist at 25169 for complimentary consults and to answer any skin questions.COAT DEFENSEwww.coatdefense.comInstagram @coat_defenseUse MOMMA15 for 15% off Got it From My Momma on the WEBwww.gotitfrommymomma.tv(Become an Insider!)Host- Jennifer Vickery Smith@jvickerysmith on Instagram WATCH podcast episodes on YouTube @gotitfrommymommapodcast
Your new best friend and super wise mom dropped by for the conversation all women need to hear. Whether you're raising young children or are an empty nester, this chat with three-time best-selling author and popular podcaster Melanie Shankle is a must-listen! Melanie and Alisa share stories of both being daughters and raising daughters through challenging seasons. They also discuss how generational trauma often surfaces in these relationships and why it's so important to continue to do the work of healing. The encouragement from these two strong women of faith is like a booster shot for those long parenting days! Melanie's new book, Here Be Dragons: Treading the Deep Water of Motherhood, Mean Girls and Generational Trauma, is available now. You can also connect with Melanie on Instagram, where you'll find info about her podcast, The Big Boo Cast. Quoteworthy: "You're only going to raise a child as emotionally and spiritually healthy as you are." If you're looking for a community to go deeper with, RW+ Membership is for you! RW+ brings together everything you need to honor God with your body, grow in faith, and find freedom and wholeness through Christ. Check it out here: [link] Get connected: revelationwellness.org | Instagram | YouTube Please consider following this show (and sharing it with a friend), leaving a review, and telling us what you think with a voice message! If you leave us a voice message, be sure to include the episode number. Follow | Leave a Review | Send a Voice Message *By leaving a SpeakPipe voice message, you agree that Revelation Wellness may use your voice message for podcast, promotional, and website content (unless otherwise specified).
Your new best friend and super wise mom dropped by for the conversation all women need to hear. Whether you're raising young children or are an empty nester, this chat with three-time best-selling author and popular podcaster Melanie Shankle is a must-listen! Melanie and Alisa share stories of both being daughters and raising daughters through challenging seasons. They also discuss how generational trauma often surfaces in these relationships and why it's so important to continue to do the work of healing. The encouragement from these two strong women of faith is like a booster shot for those long parenting days! Melanie's new book, Here Be Dragons: Treading the Deep Water of Motherhood, Mean Girls and Generational Trauma, is available now. You can also connect with Melanie on Instagram, where you'll find info about her podcast, The Big Boo Cast. Quoteworthy: "You're only going to raise a child as emotionally and spiritually healthy as you are." If you're looking for a community to go deeper with, RW+ Membership is for you! RW+ brings together everything you need to honor God with your body, grow in faith, and find freedom and wholeness through Christ. Check it out here: [link] Get connected: revelationwellness.org | Instagram | YouTube Please consider following this show (and sharing it with a friend), leaving a review, and telling us what you think with a voice message! If you leave us a voice message, be sure to include the episode number. Follow | Leave a Review | Send a Voice Message *By leaving a SpeakPipe voice message, you agree that Revelation Wellness may use your voice message for podcast, promotional, and website content (unless otherwise specified).
Today, we're diving into a complex and nuanced topic—raising daughters in today's world. Joining me for this conversation is Cathy Adams, a longtime friend of the pod, powerhouse in the parenting space, and champion of mindful, connected parenting. Her latest book, which takes center stage in today's discussion, is Restoring Our Girls: How Real Conversations Shape Our Daughters' Lives, Help Them with Teen Challenges, and Remind Them That They Matter. With her background as a clinical social worker, certified parent coach, and former child and family therapist—as well as her experience as a mom of three daughters and university professor—Cathy brings a rich, multifaceted perspective to this important topic. In this episode, Cathy and I explore the unique challenges girls face today, from societal pressures and cultural conditioning to navigating a fast-paced, often judgmental world. We discuss the importance of parents addressing their own emotional baggage, being mindful of their reactions, and recognizing how fear can hold us back from having the messy but meaningful conversations our daughters need. Cathy also shares strategies for creating judgment-free spaces where girls feel heard, validated, and supported in becoming their authentic selves. About Cathy Adams Cathy Cassani Adams, LCSW, co-hosts the long-running Zen Parenting Radio podcast and founded the Zen Parenting Conference in Chicago. She is the author of Zen Parenting and Living What You Want Your Kids to Learn (both Nautilus Award and International Book Award winners) and her upcoming 2025 release, Restoring Our Girls. Cathy is a clinical social worker, certified parent coach, former elementary school educator, and yoga teacher. She was a blogger for The Huffington Post and a former columnist for Chicago Parent Magazine. She previously worked as a Child and Family Therapist and Clinical Educator at Lurie Children's Hospital of Chicago and now teaches in the Sociology and Criminology Department at Dominican University. She lives outside Chicago with her husband, Todd, and their three daughters. Things you'll learn How cultural conditioning and societal expectations on girls can impact them (and what we need to know about it) Why parents must address their own emotional baggage to avoid projecting it onto their children How being mindful of our own reactions in the moment will help us communicate more effectively with our children The role fear plays in preventing meaningful conversations which leads to missed connection opportunities The benefits of engaging in messy and imperfect conversations for promoting authenticity How to create a judgment-free space where girls feel heard and validated to support their emotional growth Resources Zen Parenting website and resources Restoring Our Girls: How Real Conversations Shape Our Daughters' Lives, Help Them with Teen Challenges, and Remind Them That They Matter by Cathy Adams Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World by Cathy Adams Zen Parenting 2025 Summit Zen Parenting on Instagram Cathy Adams on Zen Parenting & Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World (Tilt Parenting podcast) Zen Parenting on Facebook Zen Parenting Radio podcast Getting Aligned Through Parenting and Marriage Challenges, with Zen Parenting's Cathy and Todd Adams (Tilt Parenting podcast) Pop Culturing Podcast Rescuing Our Sons: 8 Solutions to Our Crisis of Disaffected Teen Boys by Dr. John Duffy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How do you navigate mean people without becoming mean yourself? How do you heal once you realize that the first mean girl you ever met was the woman who raised you? Join Kari as she talks to NYT bestselling author Melanie Shankle for a deep-dive conversation about Melanie's latest work for girl moms - and the hope that's possible on the other side of friend or family trauma.Ep. 90 Show Notes:o Pre-order Melanie's new book, coming Feb. 18: Here Be Dragons: Treading the Deep Waters of Motherhood, Generational Trauma, and Mean Girls o Find Melanie on Instagram and The Big Boo Podcast o Melanie's story on Storytellers Liveo Join Kari on Substack for new articles or Kari's email listo Kari's books: Yours, Not Hers Teen Devo, Love Her Wello Contact Kari: kari@karikampakis.com, Instagram, and Facebook
In a recent episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, hosted by Dr. Christopher Lewis, the special guest Markus Wolf opened up about his experiences as a father to two daughters. Markus shared valuable insights into the multi-faceted journey of fatherhood, touching on themes ranging from emotional intelligence to the importance of male connections. Here, we delve deeper into the key topics from their enlightening conversation. The Joy and Fear of Knowing You'll be a Dad The Initial Ecstasy When Markus found out he was going to be a father, the joy was immediate. "I was ecstatic," he said, reflecting on that transformative moment. Unlike some men who may be taken by surprise or even ambivalence at the prospect of fatherhood, Markus had known from a young age that he wanted to be a dad. He even felt that having daughters was a form of karmic balance, avoiding the potential rebelliousness he feared from having a son. The Inherent Fears Despite his enthusiasm, Markus admitted that the journey of fatherhood comes with its own set of anxieties. One of his biggest concerns has always been about maintaining open lines of communication. He emphasized that building a home where his daughters feel safe to express themselves emotionally is crucial, yet challenging. This desire for transparent communication stemmed from his own struggles with emotional intelligence, something he recognized needed constant work. Crafting Unique Relationships with Each Child Individual Awareness One of the critical parenting strategies Markus highlighted was the importance of recognizing the distinct personalities of each child. For example, his daughter Madison is a "fireball," prone to expressing herself loudly, while Sienna tends to close off and become quiet. Understanding these differences has allowed Markus to tailor his parenting approach, ensuring that he meets each daughter's emotional needs effectively. Skill Development Through Coaching Techniques Drawing from his career as a fitness coach, Markus has seamlessly integrated coaching principles into his parenting. He speaks of a "confidence model" where he gradually builds his daughters' skill sets in a manner that empowers them. Much like his clients who increasingly master fitness routines, his children too are slowly being endowed with various life skills. Whether it's making breakfast or picking up their toys, these seemingly mundane tasks are steps toward building a well-rounded individual. Balancing Emotions and Strengthening Connections Managing Temperaments Markus is candid about one of his personal challenges—being a bit of a "hothead." He regularly finds himself working on temper control to avoid alienating his daughters. For Markus, being in a better emotional state often involves engaging in physical activity and maintaining connections with other men. These practices help him manage stress better, creating a more harmonious home environment. The Role of Male Connections The COVID-19 pandemic brought to light an essential aspect of Markus's life—male interaction. Prior to the outbreak, he found much-needed camaraderie in his daily interactions with clients and friends. The pandemic made him realize how vital these connections were for his mental well-being. According to Markus, this communication acts as a stress-relief mechanism, enabling him to return home balanced and prepared for fatherhood duties. The Mentor and Coach Pivot Incorporating Coaching into Parenting Markus describes his approach as "Miyagi-ing" his kids, reminiscent of the lessons from "The Karate Kid." By embedding valuable life skills subtly into daily routines, he's preparing his daughters for the real world without them even realizing it. This stealth approach to skill-building enables Markus to parent effectively, ensuring his daughters are ready for life's challenges while maintaining a supportive relationship. Role Models and Inspirations He also spoke about the crucial need for every man to retain some level of selfishness, not in a negative sense, but in terms of self-care. By maintaining his own well-being, Markus not only becomes a better father but also a better role model. The "loneliness epidemic" among men is something Markus is keenly aware of, actively working to combat it through his practice of connecting with other fathers and men. The Imperfect Yet Rewarding Journey of Fatherhood Markus Wolf's journey through fatherhood is not about being perfect; it's about being present and continuously striving for improvement. He emphasizes that fatherhood is a blessing that requires a balanced approach—recognizing individual needs, maintaining personal well-being, and building strong, open relationships. Markus's story serves as a powerful reminder that fatherhood, with all its challenges, is an evolving adventure, filled with moments of joy, learning, and profound love. For more insights and advice on fatherhood, join the "Dads with Daughters" community and explore resources that could make your parenting journey a little smoother. TRANSCRIPT Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to dads with daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:16]: Welcome back to the Dads with Daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters' lives, raising them to be strong, independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. Every week, I love being able to have these conversations with you where we are walking on this path together, where you and I are working to raise our daughters in the best way that we know how. And the most important thing that everyone needs to understand, no matter if you have 1 daughter, 2 daughters, 7 daughters, doesn't matter, is that we don't have to do this alone. And every week I love being able to have a conversation with you, to walk with you as we are walking down this path together, as I said, But knowing that, we don't all know everything. There is not the there is not one right way to father, and there's not one playbook to follow. So it is important for us to be able to learn from others, find other resources, find more tools for our toolbox that we can pull from to be able to be the best dads that we want to be that will help our daughters to be the women that they want to be in the future. That's why every week I bring you different guests, different people that have different experiences, that are walking this path alongside of you and are doing things maybe in a little bit different way. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:38]: But that's okay because we can learn and grow from all of their experiences as well. And this week, we have another great guest with us today. Markus Wolf is with us today. And Markus is a father of 2 daughters, and I'm really excited to have him here and for him to share his experiences with us. Markus, thanks so much for being here today. Markus Wolf [00:01:56]: Thanks for having me, Chris. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:57]: It is my pleasure. Love having you here today. 1st and foremost, question I always start off with. I love being able to have the power to turn the clock back in time. I know you have 2 daughters. So So I wanna go back to that first moment. That first moment that you found out that you were gonna be a dad to a daughter. What was going through your head? Markus Wolf [00:02:13]: I was ecstatic. I really was. I knew I wanted to be a dad since I was very young, which some dads never expect to have a child. Some of them never even wanted to have a child and I knew it. I knew it since I was in grade school. I was like, it was part of the vision. I'm going to be a father. So when it happened, it was just kind of I knew I was with the right woman. Markus Wolf [00:02:32]: I knew everything was just pieced together perfectly. So I was really, really excited, especially girl for some reason. I think, I was pretty tough as a son, and I just didn't want the payback that my father got. So it was kinda nice to just know that I was like, okay. Great. I only have to deal with a a daughter and then I got a second one. So that was like, okay. Never gonna deal with a son. Markus Wolf [00:02:51]: Nothing wrong with having sons, of course. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:53]: So you said you always knew that you wanted to be a father. Talk to me about that. What was it about being a father that really, I'm gonna say intrigued you or made you want to be a father yourself? You know, Markus Wolf [00:03:06]: Chris, it's kinda hard to explain. Right? It just some kids grow up and they wanna be firefighters. They wanna be doctors. And then some of them fulfill that that vision. And it was just part of the process of, like, what I pictured myself. I said to myself, I wanted the white picket fence house. I wanted kids. I wanted that lifestyle. Markus Wolf [00:03:23]: So I'm not really sure how to even explain it. It was just something that I knew that I desired. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:03:27]: I talked to a lot of different dads. A lot of different dads tell me that walking into fatherhood is a bit scary. There's some fear that goes along with being a dad. A lot of it comes back to the fact that there's no playbook to really follow that outside of the mentoring or what you've seen in your life. As you look at the experiences that you've had thus far as a father, what's been your biggest fear in raising daughters? Markus Wolf [00:03:50]: Communication is something you really want. It's one of the hardest things when it comes to parenting. And the the again, part of what I always pictured was my children were gonna always be able to come to me for support and to open up emotionally. And then I realized really quickly, and I think kids do this, relationships do this as well. They expose what you haven't been working on. And I wasn't working on my emotional intelligence. I mean, God bless my wife, Lindsay, for even, like, always just putting up with my, you know, I'm very like, you could call it passionate, but I usually just call it hot tempered. And when you have children again, they're not going to want to come to a human being who just doesn't know how to sit there and and, you know, understand where they're coming from and really be able to just not try to, you know, do the manly thing of just fixing their scenario. Markus Wolf [00:04:38]: So that's the one thing I'm always afraid of. I just want them to not feel like they're ever afraid to come to me to be, I need support with X, Y, and Z. And then, because perhaps I'm not showing the greatest of light, they don't come to me. That'd be the, the, probably the worst thing because they, I don't know. I mean, I feel like I've always valued having mentors and I don't need to be their top mentor, but I would like to be someone that could come to. Markus Wolf [00:04:59]: And I'm definitely gonna be following back up with that on the mentorship piece because I think that that's something that you are incorporating into your fatherhood and I wanna delve a little bit deeper into that. But before I do, I wanna ask you a little bit about when you raise children, it's not always easy. There are ups, downs, sideways, everything in between. And there are good days, there are bad days, there are you know what I mean. So, what has been the hardest part for you in being a father to a daughter? Markus Wolf [00:05:29]: I mean, you kind of said it. I'm very regimented. It's just the way I can handle the toughness of life, if you want to say. And things have to be put in place so perfectly. And that's not parenting. And that's even different when you have 2 different children that have different requirements, different skill sets. I've tried with one of them will work on a Monday and then it won't work on a Tuesday and it's incredibly frustrating. And then again, yeah, it's a constant roller coaster. Markus Wolf [00:05:53]: That's probably the toughest part because it would be so great if they just did exactly what I asked them to do all the time, but they don't. So it's probably that constant battle I have to have with myself to just slow it down and not desire so much. It's just, like, let it go type of thing. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:06:11]: Now you talk just talked about the fact that what works with one child may not work with the other. And every child is is different and the personalities are different. So talk to me about what you've had to do to be able to build those unique relationships with each of your daughters that may be different from each other. Oh, I Markus Wolf [00:06:28]: mean, first, yeah, you have to almost understand what their qualities are, right? I mean, I have my oldest daughter Madison, who she's just a fireball. So she'll rather yell, she'll scream. So she'll still voice her and she'll still communicate with words. And then you obviously have to, you know, deal with that. You just have to try to, like, bring the person bring Madison down a little bit. With my other daughter, Sienna, she just closes off. Like, she doesn't use words. She gets really quiet. Markus Wolf [00:06:52]: So then you're always just trying to figure out, well, now I know that this one is up and you gotta bring this one down to balance and the other one's a little bit down and you gotta bring it down. So that's been the first one. It's just being aware of how they respond to certain type of emotions. And then when you understand it, then you're like, okay, cool. Now what do I have in my tool belt to to bring one down and bring the other one up? Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:07:12]: Now you talked about that sometimes you can be a little bit of a hothead and you have to temper that. As you said, you don't want your children to be afraid to come to you because of that. How have you had to work on that to be able to get to a point where either you're in the right space or that you've had to had those conversations with your daughters, and you might not have had to have them yet with them so that they understand. But how have you been able to realign yourself in being a father and knowing that your emotions may be a little bit more heated and you have to be able to adjust for that. Markus Wolf [00:07:50]: I'm in fitness. I'm in health. And for me, I believe it's always about putting yourself into like a better state. So if you're like energetic, the stress is relieved. So usually, I think most dads can agree that the milk spilled on the floor is not why you had this huge yelling outburst or the TV not being shut off when you asked for it to be shut off is not really why you're you're yelling. Because if you really put things into perspective, you're like, okay. Am I really gonna get mad at this at a child for not shutting off the TV? Or am I mad because there's a whole bunch of other things I'm incredibly stressed out about that I hadn't just, you know, worked through. So for me, I have to always put myself into a state. Markus Wolf [00:08:26]: And one of them that I've really worked on for the last 2 years is I have to have a male connection at least once a week. That is like a mandatory and it's worked fabulously because once I do it, I come back and I'm I could recognize myself being like, oh, okay. So I think it was just because I needed a little bit of like stress relief. So I mean, obviously stress stress relief can look different for so many other men, but that has been the one that just brings me to the state that I need to be for parenting, if that makes sense. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:08:52]: It does. And now you talked about the fact that you are a mentor, but you're also a coach. You are and you're incorporating some of those things that you've been doing in your own business as a fitness coach, as a coach in general into your parenting. So talk to me about how you've been able to pivot that in being able to do what you're doing with clients and trying to incorporate that into the work that you're doing in trying to be the father that you want to be? Markus Wolf [00:09:29]: I stumbled upon this. It must have been just almost like an epiphany. I was just obviously I was coaching a lot of men and parenting every single day. And then I started to realize there's something there where the ultimate goal, I believe this is my parent and style. I don't know if this is all fathers is my job is to set them up for the world, right? And the more skill sets I give them, the more, like, you know, let's say even like the emotional intelligence skills around the house. All these like little things are foundational tools that you do for clients. Like clients, they need to have foundational tools to get food prepared so they could eat healthier meals. They could go outside and prioritize themselves. Markus Wolf [00:10:08]: So there's there's very much I tried to work in. What is the process number 1 for this child? I mean, where are we at? Like, you know, at 3 years old, they could barely pick up many things. But at 4 years old, they can empty the dishes. At 5 years old, they can make their own breakfast, things like that. So I started to realize that my coaching style was always like that. It's kind of like a, I call it the confidence model where you take someone and you just, what is the one thing that could boost their confidence? But it's a very easy thing that they can do. And then each time you have to recognize what is the next thing they need to do to again move towards those skill sets that you were speaking of. So I've been doing it with my children. Markus Wolf [00:10:42]: They're excellent at things around the house now without realizing that it wasn't, I'm asking, like, you know, it's not doesn't feel like a chore, I guess, I suppose you're saying. Because, again, I'm gonna use this great reference because I've been watching Cobra Kai for those past couple weeks, which is I Miyagi then. You know, it's mean I just and I do that with my clients. I Miyagi them to just suddenly have these skill sets and now they're like, oh my goodness. Now I'm like equipped for the world and I'm like, yes. I did what I needed to do. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:11:05]: Now even in Cobra Kai and Karate Kid, Daniel san ends up figuring out that he's getting Miyagi ed. So your kids are going to figure it out sometime. And they're probably going to be like, what the heck, dad? Why are you doing this? How are you gonna react? Markus Wolf [00:11:19]: I might even just do what I just did right now. I might smile a little and just said, you know, this is this is what I'm I'm trying my best. I'm like, I'm trying my best. I have good intentions and I think sometimes that's, like, at least gives you half the pass. But, yeah, if I get exposed, I will get back to you and I'll let you know how I handle it. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:11:34]: So talk to me about you talked earlier about the fact that you found within your own life that you need to have those connections with other men, other fathers, other individuals, so important for you. I don't like referencing COVID too much, just because there's, so important for you. Markus Wolf [00:11:55]: I don't like referencing covid too much just because this feels like something you just want to put behind you. But it made me recognize that what I had in the past was like a third home. I had a place to go out and when I would personal trained before covid, I was interacting with 5, 10 people a day. And then when you go from 5, 10 to 0, you start to realize that that was something that was a requirement for you. You like being heard, you like hearing other people's stories. And then when you eliminate that, I started to replace my wife for that. So really, it was just get back that same outlets. And then then again, I I can't explain why it feels so good, but it was it was exactly what I just needed. Markus Wolf [00:12:32]: I just need to talk to others and hear others and just get out and about. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:12:35]: You know, I've come to find that some men are for some men, that is not an easy thing to do, to reconnect, to make those connections, to make those friendships, especially once we become adults. Don't seem to have problems usually when we're growing up. We make those connections. We have friendships. But as we get into our adulthood and we start focusing on family, profession, other things, the push for maintaining friendships, building friendships goes away. As someone that mentors others, that coaches others, why do you think that happens? And what have you done to be able to try to help other men to reconnect like you are? Markus Wolf [00:13:16]: That's a really great point. You made me remember what it was like being with my father or being raised with my father and he had 0 friends. So I think that was already a glaring sign. And the first things that I feel like I recognize was I talk about that a lot with clients, even sometimes the very first interaction. I say to them that when we were younger, when we were men, it was 95% of our time were with other men. Locker room banter, playing video games, going outside, and you're pretty much just hanging out with men your whole entire life up until the point when you're dating the person that you're eventually gonna have children with and then get married. So for me, I personally just started to use I'm a meathead at heart, Chris, to be honest. So I just work out with men because it just seems to be a 2 birds with 1 stone type of scenario. Markus Wolf [00:14:05]: And I think a lot of men can can connect with that. Maybe it's not working out. Maybe it's, hey. I'm gonna go join a softball team, and that might even just be enough to do the thing. Markus Wolf [00:14:14]: No, it does. And I think that it's important to understand that. That's one of the reasons why in fathering together, we develop the online communities that we have, but we also have in person opportunities for dads to connect with other dads and be able to open up opportunities for men to be able to connect, connect with their kids, connect with each other because connection is so important. But we, as I said, sometimes forget about that and focus so much on other aspects that leads to the prevalence of loneliness. And you'll see lots of studies that are out there right now that talk about the pervasiveness of loneliness in malehood right now. And most men don't wanna talk about it, and they just wanna kind of push it down and keep pushing forward because that's what we do. We push through, right? So it's not an easy thing to deal with, but it's also important to for us to deal with because if we don't, our kids are watching and our kids will also identify and see what's happening. So one of the questions that I have, I guess, is this because you work with a lot of dads and men in the coaching that you do through fitness, through life. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:15:32]: What are some of the biggest challenges that some of these men that are coming to you, working with you right now are dealing with? And are you seeing commonalities amongst them? Markus Wolf [00:15:41]: 100%. I feel like at this point, because I've worked with 100 and it's just patterns. And usually the one pattern that I'm noticing a lot is the values they have are outside of themselves. So it's never a bad thing to provide. That's one of a very important role you're supposed to do as a parent, as an adult. But I couldn't understand that because I'll admit it, I was quite selfish in my twenties, which kind of prepared me for how to, you know, be successful in fitness. But their line in what it does, it prioritizes self, it prioritizes if your energy is not where you want it to be, you prioritize it. If your stress management is not where you want it to be, you prioritize it. Markus Wolf [00:16:21]: And most of the men I work with, and this is what I fear for my kids, is, like, they don't prioritize themselves. They prioritize appeasing work, their boss, wife. You gotta keep your wife happy, but she's in control of her own happiness. In my personal opinion, that if you're not in control of yours, that's probably a big, big issue. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:16:40]: For those men that you're working with that have a hard time identifying those priorities, because sometimes men do. Sometimes they are floundering a bit and there are individuals that are listening right now that may be thinking, I just don't know where to start. Where should they start? Markus Wolf [00:16:55]: Using that same model that I spoke about, it's usually the easiest route is the first route. So even if it's just going for a walk and listening to an audiobook you've been wanting to listen to forever, It's probably a larger sense of accomplishment to some men than you would even believe. To others, it would be that's just a typical Monday morning. I go for a walk on the beach and I listen to an audiobook or something. But for them, some of these men, they they they just keep saying that they're going to do something. And that's that action, I believe, is already enough for them to, put forward towards where they need to go. And if you're already doing that again, what is the the thing that you keep holding off at? Because that's likely the thing that's gonna push you forward. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:17:33]: I appreciate you sharing that as well. Now, we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5 where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Are you ready? Ready. In one word, what is fatherhood? Markus Wolf [00:17:43]: It's a blessing. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:17:43]: When was the time that you finally felt like you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Markus Wolf [00:17:47]: I take my girls on a on a monthly date. And usually, on days where they finish school, you have to drag them out of the playground just to leave to go home. But on our monthly dates, they will run and they cannot wait to to join me. And I feel like that's they're looking forward to it. That's already a good sign. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:03]: Now your kids are still young, so they might not have a lot of answers for this. But if I was to talk to your kids, how would they describe you as a dad? Markus Wolf [00:18:09]: I think they totally answer it with, I'm the fun guy who tends to yell a lot. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:14]: Now let's go at this point maybe 15 years down the road. What do you want them to say then? Markus Wolf [00:18:19]: As long as they could say something, that's the man I trust, That's the man I I look up to. That's the man that I am looking to get him a partner like. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:26]: Who inspires you to be a better dad? Markus Wolf [00:18:27]: Ben, 100%. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:28]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice today, things that you've learned along the way. What's one piece of advice you'd wanna give to every dad? Markus Wolf [00:18:34]: Choose your battles. If you're like me, you want like, I just told you, I I wanna add skill sets to them. I want them to have things to be better in the world, but it's not gonna happen overnight. So just sometimes let it go. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:46]: And that's definitely not always easy. Markus Wolf [00:18:48]: No. It's probably the toughest thing I've ever done in my life. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:51]: Now, if people wanna find out more about you and what you're up to, where should they go? Markus Wolf [00:18:55]: They can find me on Instagram, coach Markus Wolf, m a r k u s, Wolf, and drop a whole bunch of knowledge bombs if they want anything. And also just, again, resonance. So if you're a father and you're just looking to resonate with someone who's been holding on to healthy habits even with 2 children, just give me a call. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:10]: Well, Markus, I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for being here today, for sharing what you've learned thus far, and I wish you all the best. Markus Wolf [00:19:17]: Appreciate you, Chris. This was a pleasure. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:19]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the dads with daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the fatherhood insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, and the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step roadmaps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly dads like you. So check it out at fatheringtogether.org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week all geared to helping you raise strong and powered daughters and be the best dad that you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:17]: We're all in the same boat, And it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time, we give the lessons, we make the meals, we buy them presents and bring your a game. Because those kids are growing fast, the time goes by just like a dynamite blast, be the best dad you can be. Be the best dad you can be.
Fatherhood is a journey laden with challenges, triumphs, and a multitude of rewarding experiences. For some, it means rewriting the scripts handed down by previous generations and breaking stereotypes. Kevin Riley, a father of three, a Bronx councilman, author, and one of the founding members of "The Dad Gang," epitomizes this transformative journey. In this week's Dads with Daughters podcast, Kevin Riley shared his unique story, shedding light on his mission to redefine Black fatherhood and support other fathers in similar pursuits. The Crucial First Steps: Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt Fear as a Driving Force When Kevin Riley found out he was going to be a father to his first daughter, Brooke, fear struck him. Having grown up without a father, he was acutely aware of what he lacked in terms of role models and guidance. Reflecting on those initial fears, Riley shared, "I was scared but also excited because it was a journey I could pour so much value into." His primary concern was whether he was parenting the right way. Riley's transparency about his fears dismantles the myth of the all-knowing father. It is okay to be scared, okay to doubt — what matters is the desire to overcome these fears and become the best dad possible. Balancing Responsibilities: The Art of Time Management Striking a Balance in a Busy Life Being a councilman often pulls Kevin Riley in different directions, demanding a delicate balance between public responsibilities and family life. "I bring my children everywhere," Riley explains. From community events to City Hall hearings, his children are often by his side, learning the ropes of civic engagement early on. This unique approach serves dual purposes: it provides valuable bonding time and exposes his children to the concept of public service. Riley's method underscores the importance of integrating children into various aspects of life, making them active participants in their father's world. Empowering Daughters: The Challenge and the Reward Breaking Gender Norms Kevin Riley emphasized the importance of empowering his daughters to pursue any career they desire, irrespective of societal expectations. He makes it a point to connect his daughters with powerful female leaders to illustrate that they can achieve the same heights as their male counterparts. "In a male-dominated society, you have to find creative ways to empower your daughters," Riley says. The lesson here is that fatherhood extends beyond basic caregiving; it's about paving the way for your children to see themselves as capable and equal contributors to society. Sharing the Journey: "Hop Into Life" From Personal Experience to Published Author Riley's book, "Hopping Through Life," co-authored with his children, is a heartfelt narrative aimed at demystifying the complexities of fatherhood. The inspiration stemmed from his own experiences and his nightly ritual of reading to his kids. "Be proud of the journey you've been through because it created the person you are today," Riley advises. The book serves as a beacon for other fathers, particularly those who may have grown up without a father figure. It's a testament to overcoming obstacles and embracing the messy, yet beautiful, journey of parenting. Community Building: The Dad Gang Changing Stereotypes, One Dad at a Time One of the most impactful initiatives Kevin Riley has been involved with is "The Dad Gang." Founded by Sean Williams, this organization was borne out of a single comment that stereotyped Black fathers. "We created this community online, but we really wanted to go deeper," Riley explains. The Dad Gang hosts events like the "March of Dads," which feature public walks and community activities aimed at showcasing the active involvement of Black fathers. The group also organizes healing circles and interactive forums that provide emotional support and amplify the narratives of Black fatherhood. Final Words: The All-Important Advice Make Time, Always As Kevin Riley beautifully puts it, "There's no amount of money that you can earn within your lifetime that would amount to the time you could spend with your children." For dads feeling overwhelmed or questioning their readiness due to financial constraints, Riley offers the essential advice to prioritize time with their children over everything else. His advocacy for this critical aspect of fatherhood is both inspiring and actionable. Through his roles as a councilman, author, and community leader, Kevin Riley is not just rewriting his own narrative — he's providing a new script for Black fatherhood, challenging stereotypes, and inspiring fathers everywhere to be the best they can be. His story serves as a powerful reminder that fatherhood, above all, is a journey of love, patience, and unwavering commitment. TRANSCRIPT (Unedited transcript created with CASTMAGIC) Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to dads with daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:16]: Welcome back to the Dads With Daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughter's lives, raising them to be strong, independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. This week, as always, I'm on this journey with you. You and I are going along this journey to be the best dads that we can be. And the thing that I love is that you show up every week to be able to learn, to grow, to hear from other fathers, hear from other people about the journeys that they've been on, and some of the resources that they've been able to either create, provide, or just the experiences that they've had that can give you some context, give you some ideas about things that you can do to be able to better engage with your daughters or just be there and just be able to be the best dad that you can be and help them in the journey that they're on as they're moving into womanhood. That's why every week I love being able to bring you different guests, different people with different experiences that come to fatherhood just like you and I, without a lot of resources, without a lot of ideas, because there's no one right way to father. However, we can learn from each other. We can learn from so many others to be able to be that better father that we wanna be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:37]: Today, we got another great guest with us today. Kevin Riley is a father of 3. He is a district 12 Bronx councilman and a soon to be published author and founding member of the dad gang. And we're gonna be talking to him about his own journey, about being a dad of 2 daughters and a son, but also some of the we'll talk about his new book. We'll talk about a little bit of a lot of things to be able to get some of his own perspectives. So I'm really excited to have him here. Kevin, thanks so much for being here today. Kevin Riley [00:02:11]: Thank you for having me, Dr. Lewis. How are you doing today? Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:13]: I really appreciate you being here. And I always love starting this these interviews with an opportunity to turn the clock back in time. I know you've got 2 daughters. You got a 9 and a 5 year old. So I'm gonna go back. Maybe it's 10 years. Maybe it's 9 years. Never know. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:28]: But I wanna go back to the very beginning. I wanna go back to that first moment that you found out that you're going to be a father to a daughter. What was going through your head? Kevin Riley [00:02:36]: I was scared. I think I was truly scared finding out that my at that time, my fiance was pregnant. She's my wife now. Pregnant with our first daughter, Brooke. Really scared because at that time, you know, I didn't grow up with a father. So as you stated before, we're trying to learn fatherhood techniques, we're trying to learn different tips, we're trying to learn different situations that may, you know, come about within our children's lives from each other. It's so important that we create these communities because at that time I didn't know. I I was really truly scared, but I did know that I wanted to be the best father possible. Kevin Riley [00:03:09]: I know that at minimal. I knew I wanted to be the best father possible. So I would say 10 years ago, man, when I find out or 9 years ago, when I found out that Brooke was gonna be more, I was scared, but I was really excited too because it was a journey that I felt that I can, give so much back and pour so much value Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:03:24]: back to school. You just said that you were scared. And I think a lot of dads are scared to step into fatherhood, let alone being a father to a daughter. And there's some fear that goes into that. As you've gone through these 9 years with your oldest daughter and your other kids as well, what's been your biggest fear in being a father to a daughter? Kevin Riley [00:03:46]: I think my biggest fear, and I'm a be totally transparent with you, making sure that I'm parented the right way. There's no manual into being a father. There's no manual into being a dad. There's no right way of doing things all the time, and I think really there are times when even I'm communicating with my daughter, my daughter's trying to communicate with me or even show affection. I mean, I may be busy as you stated, I'm a I'm a New York City council member, so my job is very, very busy a lot of the times, So I won't be as available to my daughter as much as I will possibly wanna be available to her. So you kinda get that fear of, hey. Am I doing this the right way? Is my daughter going to find love outside of her father because she felt like she didn't get that male love from her father, because he wasn't there for her as much as possible. And then once I was able to kind of fight those different thoughts within myself, I was able to apply, what I wanted to be, because I think it's the fear. Kevin Riley [00:04:40]: The fear always puts doubt within yourself. Then if you really open your eyes, I was always available at her doctor's appointments, I was always going to her shows, I was always showing up for everything for my children. It puts that doubt aside because we have fear, especially when you grow up, and like I stated, I grew up without a father. So that fear of, hey. I didn't get the blueprint. I don't know how a father is supposed to deal with this with their child. I think after I got off that fear and that doubt, I was able to be the best father that I'm actually doing a really pretty good job. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:05:10]: That being a councilman, you have a busy life, and you're pulled in a lot of different directions. Being an elected person in an elected office definitely is something that puts you into the limelight in many aspects. People get to know you. And sometimes your kids don't get that in regard to being that public figure in that way. And they don't always understand that you have to be away to be able to build them the life that they are accustomed to. So talk to me about that in regards to balance because I think that so many fathers have to try to balance their work life, their or or professional life, their personal life, and trying to find what that perfect balance is to be able to show up and to be able to be in the lives of their kids the way that they wanna be. How have you been able to do that? Have you struggled with it? What have you done to be able to get better at it? Kevin Riley [00:06:10]: Yeah. I think I touched, a little bit about that with the fear and the doubt, but then you you mentioned something balance and time management. I am a person that if you know me and the way I govern, I bring my children everywhere. So my children actually attend community events for me. My children actually attend meetings for me. I'll even bring my children to city hall at hearings sometimes because I think it's very important for them to see exactly what their father does and important for them to be civically engaged as well. I'm trying to teach civics to my children at a very, very early age. You do understand that within our country, you know, a lot of children don't get the accessibility or the access to learn about how government truly works. Kevin Riley [00:06:46]: So I get I think my children are seeing that on a day to day basis, and they understand what their father is or what their father contributes, to their community. I do a lot of work with giving back to my community and my children realize that and they really appreciate that. So I think, time management is really important. I have a luxury of bringing my children to work. A lot of fathers don't have the luxury of bringing their children to work. But even if you don't have the luxury of bringing your children to work, I think time management is very important. Even if you take a hour, 2 hours, that's why you go we came out with this book and we're writing this book and I know we're gonna touch on that a little bit later. But just doing activity with your child, reading to your children, going out and playing with your children. Kevin Riley [00:07:26]: We can make time. There's 24 hours in the day. There's always time that you can make to engage with your children and I realized that with time management, I may not have the opportunity to sit down and watch cartoons all day with my children. But in the morning time, when I'm getting them ready for school, engaging, communicating with them, and conversing with them, in the evening time, making sure that I shut my phone calls off at a certain period of time, and I'm able to sit down with my children, you know, watch a TV show, catch up with them, have some dinner with them, things of that nature. I think time management is crucial Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:07:58]: It truly is. For your father. Now one of the things that I wanted to go back to, you were talking about fear and raising daughters. And raising kids is not always easy. There's ups. There's downs. There's every which way. And sometimes days are good. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:08:11]: Sometimes they may not be. So it can be difficult at times as well. What's been the hardest part of being a father to a daughter? Kevin Riley [00:08:18]: I think the hardest part of being a father to a daughter is being able to empower them to do whatever they wanna do within their life. Coming from a male and my wife does an amazing job with empowering our daughters. But coming from their father as a man, they see me doing a lot of amazing dope things, and I don't want them to feel like only men can do this. I try to empower them, and I try to be equalizers to them and let them know, like, hey. As I'm doing this, there's powerful leaders out there doing this as well, so I think it's very important, especially in my field. I always try to connect my daughters to very powerful women leaders alongside with them. Their mother has a very powerful position as well, but other powerful leaders out there who are women and who are doing a lot of dope amazing things, because I want them to feel like this is not male driven. You know, their father, they see the dope things their father is doing all the time. Kevin Riley [00:09:07]: They see their father's always on television all the time, but they also see the Bronx borough president who's the 1st black woman to hold that position. She does amazing things, and when we go to events, they're able to connect with her on real time, and they're able to talk to her, ask her questions. So I think that has been the challenge as a dad with raising daughters because I think in a male dominant society, you really try to find creative ways to empower them and let them know that they could do the same thing that you could do even though it's a male dominant. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:09:36]: You mentioned that you've got a new book coming out called Popping Through Life. And I know that in that book, you are trying to really remind families that family is not just about blood relations or focusing on what it means to focusing on what we may lack in our lives. So I wanna go back to the beginning as you have created this story. As as an author myself, I know how much time, effort, passion have to go into the creation of these pieces that are being put out into the world. What made you decide that you wanted to be an author, and what made you decide that this was the topic for kids that you wanted to talk about? Kevin Riley [00:10:15]: I've always been passionate about expressing my story to individuals. Growing up, my father and my mother migrated to America from Jamaica, and unfortunately, my father, he was incarcerated when we were younger, and I used to always visit him when he was in the criminal justice system. And that's why I thought I was actually going. So that's why when my daughter was born in 2015 and now me being a council member, you can see that was a total different change, you know, in direction in life, and I believe my father did the best that he possibly could. We have a great relationship today. You know, we stay connected as much as possible, and I really strongly feel that the storyline came from me expressing where the challenges that I grew up with, where that came through, and it's really much just hopping through life, like, getting through getting by. I feel a lot of us feel like we're just getting by through life a lot of times, and once I have my daughter in 2015 and I'm learning, then I have my other daughter in 2019, and then my son came in 2022, it's like I learned different things at with each child, and I'm hopping through this thing we call parent look. It's something that I do with my children every single night as I read to my children. Kevin Riley [00:11:22]: Something in New York City and and throughout the nation, we're trying to promote literacy to our children, so I think it's crucially and truly important as parents that you read to your children as much as possible and have your children read back to you as much as possible. But as we were reading these stories and every time I'm reading the story, I'm always reading the author and the illustration illustrator out to the story. And my daughter said one day, like, hey, dad would love if one day we could tell our story. And when she said that, I'm like, wow. That really struck me because as a council member, I'm always verbal. I'm always giving speeches about my story, but I've never written my story down, and I wanted to write it in a sense where a father who has experienced the same things that I've experienced growing up and their their journey of fatherhood and them kind of hopping, they can actually read the story to their children so their children could actually understand as well, like, hey, your father's not perfect. Your father there wasn't a machine that was created. It was just dad. Kevin Riley [00:12:16]: Here's a dad. Here's a mom. Your father has been through stuff. Your father has trauma in their life. Your father is healing. Your father is learning different things, and they are just getting through life the same way that you're getting through life as a child. Our child learned to crawl, then walk, then then then read, then then go to school on their own. They learn different things, and you continue to learn. Kevin Riley [00:12:36]: Learning doesn't stop when you graduate school. Learning continues throughout life, so I think that's where the journey of the book came from. It it's about me telling my story, but also about me giving a platform for fathers who experience things like me. There's a lot of tons of fathers out there who didn't have a father figure in their life, and they're going into this journey of fatherhood. They can actually read a story to their children that could kind of outline that. And we utilize character of a bunny because bunnies are really popular with children, Bugs Bunny. Bunnies are really, really popular with children as an animal, and they're energized. Bunnies are really energized, and that's what we feel like fathers should be in their children's lives. Kevin Riley [00:13:13]: They should be their children's Energizer Bunny. They should energize their children to make sure that they're going out and being the best of their ability. So that's where the book and the journey of the book came from, and I'm really excited that we're releasing it on September 6th on National Reader Book Day. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:13:27]: So you're telling your story, and you're sharing that with the masses. What are you hoping that people are going to take from reading this for themselves and reading to their children? Kevin Riley [00:13:39]: Be proud of the journey that you've been through because the journey that you've been through created the person that you are today, and we shouldn't always shun away from it. I know sometimes people are kind of embarrassed of their upbringing. They're embarrassed of the trauma that they experience through their life, but I think they should kind of look at the good out of that because it made them into a very resilient person. It made them into a very strong person that's able to conquer any challenges that they may embark on, you know, moving forward. And hopping through life really engages and showcases that even though you may have had trauma throughout your life, you could still be a great dad. Even though you may not had a father when you were younger, you could still be a great dad. And also to be sympathetic, you don't know what your father went through. Your father had a father. Kevin Riley [00:14:23]: Your father's father had a father. There has been lineage of fatherhood that's been happening throughout generations, and there's no manual. I think a lot of times when we think of parents, we always circle and and focus on mothers all the time, but fathers are as important as mothers as well. I think fathers don't know that. I know in New York City, I passed a resolution that made June in New York City fatherhood recognition month because we want to recognize fathers throughout the entire month of June. But not only do that, the whole goal is to create centers for fathers. We partner with organizations like the Real Dads Network. I have an organization that I know I'm gonna we're gonna talk about soon, the dad gang, but we really want to create these fatherhood centers that provide resources for fathers to really flourish, that will help fathers find jobs, help fathers connect with their children emotionally. Kevin Riley [00:15:11]: I think fathers, even men, we've been taught to be really, really masculine at times and not really be really comprehensive, really understand our feelings, really be emotionally connected, to our emotional feelings, so we can emotionally connect with our children and understand that. So I think that's why I want people to get from this book. I want people to really understand that, hey, even though you did have a journey that brought you to this day, you should embrace it, and you should really know that it made you into the strong, resilient person that you are in today's society. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:15:44]: Now you talked about the organization that you are a part of and that you founded called Dad Gang. Talk to me about Dad Gang, why you decided to start it, what its goals are, and what you're hoping that people are going to take away from being a part of it. Kevin Riley [00:16:00]: So when you talk about fatherhood, one negative aspect and negative stereotype about fatherhood is black fathers aren't involved in their children's lives. So when we started the Dag Gang, the Dag Gang, Sean Williams, who's the founder of the Dag Gang, who's our fraternity brother, Kappa Alpha Paternity Incorporated. He started the Dag Gang, in 2015 when he had his second daughter, and he was in the supermarket with his child, and, a white woman had said to him, I'm glad you stuck around. It's good that you stuck around. And he was really offended by that comment, but he's like, I know tons of fathers out there that are involved in their children's lives. So we first, we got together and at that time, that's when social media really started picking up. You had Instagram, you had Twitter, you had all these different platforms that people are really looking at people lives on a device. So we want to put out as much positive imagery and visions of black fatherhood. Kevin Riley [00:16:53]: We didn't realize we are creating a community of black fathers that were coming to this page, seeing all the dope black fathers out there, connecting with those fathers because we would add put their username there, connecting with them because they were from their city and towns, and really building this market that, hey. You might have a father like I have, at that time, my daughter, at the time between 2015 and 2018, she just turned 3 at that time. I could connect with a brother who has a 10 year old. So they have a 10 year old daughter. So I know between 3 10 year old what are certain things I should be doing, certain things I should be saying, certain things I should not be doing. It creates this kinda community, so we created this community online, but we really want to go a little bit deeper. So we started to do events where we organize and mobilize in different states, and we do something called the March of Dads. So it started off with calling strolling with the homies, but we changed the name to the March of Dads because we wanted to go to landmarks in different places. Kevin Riley [00:17:46]: So for instance, we went to in New York City, we go to Prospect. In New York City, we just did the Bronx Children's Museum. In Atlanta, we did Ponce City Market. In DC, we marched by the White House, and we wanted to go to landmarks and showcase, and you just see a whole bunch of Black fathers, fathers of color, walking together with strollers, carry ons, older children, grandfathers, fathers. You just see that image and it showcases to you that black fathers are really engaged. But not only do we do that, we host a bunch of conversations and talks. So we do healing circles where we call it the dad house, where we have fathers, just fathers, just speaking. Because sometimes we feel like there's no place for us to just speak and just express how we feel. Kevin Riley [00:18:28]: As men, I go back to the masculinity. We're always taught that we're not supposed to show emotions. We're supposed to figure things out, just kinda go through life and just figure things out. Be tough about things, and that continues to just break us down. And then we get to a point where we break down, and that healing process is so challenging. I read a book called Battle Cry by Jason Wilson. Amazing book, where he talked about that, that we focus so much on the masculinity part about manhood, which is important, but we need to also talk about emotions and the comprehensive part about being the man as well. So the dad game, we really formulated this organization to be a a nest, a safe haven for fathers of color out there to showcase that we are present. Kevin Riley [00:19:10]: We do tons of different other activities. We hand out strollers, diapers, things of that nature in different parts of the city and the, the nation. We're in different parts. We do stuff in LA, DC, Atlanta, where we're branching out to different parts as well, but it's really organization. Tap in. It's the dadgang.com, or you can follow us on the dad gang on any platform. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:32]: I love the concept. I love the idea. As a global organization, it is definitely something that's needed to be able to as you kind of were talking about in the sense of redefining fatherhood and redefining black fatherhood or or the masses and to show that what the founder heard in the grocery store is not accurate and it is definitely not something that should be perpetuated. So I appreciate all the work that the organization's doing to engage dads in so many ways. There are so many opportunities for dads to be able to come together. This is one great way to be able to do that. And I encourage people to check out The Dad Gang at the dad gang.com to be able to learn more about their events, their activities, and how you can get involved as well. Now we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5, where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:27]: Are you ready? In one word, what is fatherhood? Kevin Riley [00:20:30]: Love. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:31]: When was a time that you finally felt like you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Kevin Riley [00:20:36]: The completion of Hop Into LifeBook. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:38]: If I was to talk to your kids, how would they describe you as a dad? Kevin Riley [00:20:41]: Mister Clean. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:44]: What about 10 years from now? What do you want them to say? Kevin Riley [00:20:46]: My dad is my best friend. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:48]: Who inspires you to be a better dad? Kevin Riley [00:20:49]: My children. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:50]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice today, things that you've learned along the way. As we finish up today, what's one piece of advice you'd want to give to every dad? Kevin Riley [00:20:58]: Make time to be with your children. There's no amount of money that you can earn within your lifetime that would amount to the amount of time you could spend with your children. I talk to a ton of people out there who are interested in becoming a father and they and they always say to me like, 'hey, I just think I'm not financially ready yet.' Yes, having a child can be very expensive, but in the same sense it's more expensive when you're not spending time with your children. Because the time that you're missing with your children is something you can never make up. So I always give the advice to every dad out there, make time to be around your children, whether if it's an hour a day, whatever the time is, just make time so you could truly just connect with them and so you can just see how dope you are and just really showcase your love that you have for them. If the Hop Into LifeBook could order it on hopindolifebook.com. It's going to be an amazing amazing series because there's gonna be some more books that's gonna come out after and I'm really really proud of my children who are co authors of this book, Brook Kate and Caleb Riley. And I would just advise you just find that activity that you could do with your kids together. Kevin Riley [00:22:03]: It will really really make you guys closer and really make them be able to express their creative juices to you as well. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:09]: Well, Kevin, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for doing what you're doing to be able to be active in your own kids' lives, but also what you're doing to be able to engage with other dads, to be able to push them to be that engaged father that they want to be as well. And I wish you all the best. Kevin Riley [00:22:27]: Thank you, doctor Lewis. Thank you for having me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:28]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the fatherhood insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, and the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step road maps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly, dads like you. So check it out at fathering together dot org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week, all geared to helping you raise strong empowered daughters and be the best dad that you can be. We're all in the same boat, and it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time, We give the lessons. We make the meals. We buy them presents and bring your a game. Because those kids are growing fast. The time goes by just like a dynamite blast, calling astronauts and firemen, carpenters, and muscle men. Get out and be the world. Choose them. Be the best dad you can be. Be the best dad you can be.
Today on The Dad Whisperer Podcast I'm joined by Robyn Gobbel, a neuroscience and parenting expert, who will rock your world in the best of ways. If you're a dad—or a mom---who is RAISING A DAUGHTER WITH BIG, BAFFLING BEHAVIORS (this is from the title of her best-selling book ), today's episode will give you practical and powerful tools so you can be the best parent you can be!
In this week's episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Ryan Senters, a dedicated father of two biological children and nine adopted kids, who also runs a nonprofit, called Ohana, providing housing and support for foster children. We discussed the joys and fears of fatherhood, the challenges of raising daughters, and the importance of being intentional in parenting. The First Steps of Fatherhood Finding Out You're Going to Be a Dad Recalling the moment he found out he was going to be a father to his first daughter, Brooklyn, Ryan Senters felt a wave of excitement and a profound sense of responsibility. He and his wife had been trying to conceive for two years, making the news even more special. Ryan described feeling the urgency to "get this right," a sentiment many new fathers can relate to. "When we found out that I was gonna have our daughter, Brooklyn, just yeah. Sure excitement and a sense of, like, probably responsibility of, like, oh, jeez. I gotta take this serious here. I gotta make sure that I do this right." — Dr. Ryan Senters Overcoming Fears Many fathers admit to feeling a unique set of fears when they learn they're expecting a daughter. Ryan was no different, expressing anxiety about being present and doing everything "right," especially since he lacked a paternal role model growing up. He noted the irrationality of some of these fears but acknowledged how they shaped his approach to fatherhood. "I was just worried that I needed to make sure that I know it's not a right way, but in my head, I was very thick. I had this fixed mindset. I would needed to get this right." — Dr. Ryan Senters The Challenges of Raising Daughters Being a Role Model One of Ryan's significant concerns was modeling the kind of man he wanted his daughters to value in their future. He emphasized the importance of being intentionally present, not just for his daughters but also for his wife, to set a positive example. His daughters, one biological and one adopted, keep looking to him for wisdom and guidance. "They deserve to be independent and helping them develop self-confidence. They need to have a dad in their corner that's cheering them on and an example to what it means to have a man in their life." — Dr. Ryan Senters Balancing Life and Responsibilities As a busy professional and father of many, Ryan discussed the concept of balance. He highlighted the seasonality of responsibilities and stressed the importance of mental reset techniques, like the photo in his garage that reminds him of his primary job when entering his home. Ryan advocates for being an "intentional father" rather than just a "present" one, incorporating activities like tech-free Sundays to foster family bonds. The Adoption Journey Deciding to Adopt Ryan and his wife always felt a calling towards fostering and adopting children. They opened their home to numerous children over 15 years, offering them a loving and stable environment. Ryan shared touching stories about his adopted children, like his daughter Pima, who struggled with her past but found strength and identity within their family. "We have this mantra in our family: you are strong, you are brave, and you are kind. And so when she gets that, you are so strong... That's a big moment for us." — Dr. Ryan Senters Expanding the Family The decision to adopt more children came with challenges. Ryan recalled selling their home to move into a larger space that could accommodate five more children, a testament to their dedication and love. Their nonprofit, Ohana, named after a meaningful family quote, strives to find forever families for kids in need, embodying the belief that every child deserves a family. "Ohana means family and family means no one's left behind or forgotten. And it was so significant for our family." — Dr. Ryan Senters Building a Legacy: Ohana Ryan also spoke about his nonprofit organization, Ohana, which provides crucial support, housing, and family connections for foster children. His work not only benefits his family but extends to helping other families navigate the complexities of fostering and adoption. "Our belief is that every child deserves a family. Our belief is that a kid's past story doesn't define them. And what we have learned is that if a family is consistent and present, any child's past hurts can be healed." — Dr. Ryan Senters Conclusion Ryan Senters' journey is a testament to the power of intentional fatherhood and the impact a loving, supportive family can have on a child's life. His story encourages all dads to step up, be present, and be intentional in their parenting, whether with biological or adopted children. For more insights and stories like Ryan's, check out the Dads with Daughters podcast and consider diving into additional resources available at fatheringtogether.org. TRANSCRIPT (Unedited transcript created with CASTMAGIC) Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to dads with daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:16]: Welcome back to the dads with daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters' lives, raising them to be strong, independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. And as always, every week, I love being able to be on this journey with you because you and I are on a journey together. I've got 2 daughters, you've got daughters. We are working through this trying to figure it out as we go along. None of us have all the answers. So it's important to be able to learn from other people and be open to learning from other people. And that's why this show is here. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:49]: This show is here to be able to provide you resources, provide you opportunities to, to hear from other dads, other people with different experiences that can help you to be the dad that you wanna be and help you to raise your daughters to be those strong independent women that you want them to be as well. Today, we got another great guest with us today. Doctor Ryan Centers is with us today, and Ryan is a father of 2 biological kids, 9 adopted kids, but he also runs a nonprofit that has been able to provide housing and support for more than 500 foster children. He's a busy guy, And I am really excited to have him here to learn more from him and his journey and to introduce him to you. Ryan, thanks so much for being here today. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:01:35]: Yeah. Thanks for having me on. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:36]: It is my pleasure. And I love being able to learn from other dads. And, one of the things that I love doing first and foremost is turning the clock back in time. So I wanna go all the way back to your first biological daughter, that daughter that that made you a father. But I wanna go back to that first moment that you found out you were going to be a father to a daughter. What was going through your head? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:01:56]: My wife and I were trying to get pregnant for a lot probably 2 years. So probably it was just more excitement than anything else. We really didn't have any expectation, boy or girl, but when we found out that I was gonna have our daughter, Brooklyn, just yeah. Sure excitement and a sense of, like, probably responsibility of, like, oh, jeez. I gotta take this serious here. I gotta make sure that I do this right. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:15]: Oh, and I don't know that there is one right way to do it. There isn't one right way to do it. So a lot of dads say, I've got to get this right. I got to do it right. There's got to be a right way to do it. And I keep saying, no, there's not. There's not one right way. There's lots of ways. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:29]: So thinking back to those first days of being a dad, and I I talk to a lot of dads with daughters and a lot of dads are there's fear going into being a father, but there's also a fear of being a father to a daughter. What was your biggest fear in being a father to a daughter? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:02:47]: Yeah. I guess when I was as I think back, I think generally when we when I had my little girl in my in my arms, I was just like, one, just never have done this before and kinda felt a little bit useless. My wife did a great job and was very patient very patient with me. And obviously, I wanted to be involved, but I guess my fear being with my, daughter is that I needed to, I don't know, just being present. I was just worried that I needed to make sure that I know it's not a right way, but in my head I was very thick. I had this fixed mindset. I would needed to get this right. So it was a little bit irrational and a little bit probably not correct, but I was 28 years old and trying to figure this out. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:03:27]: And I was like, oh, shoot. I need to make sure that this like, my dad, Nessa, wasn't active in my life, so I didn't really have a picture of that. So I didn't have a compass to kinda help direct that. So for me, I it produced a little bit of anxiety in the beginning stages because I wanted to make sure that I wasn't doing it wrong. And I think my past story and, like, my my family of origin really kinda impacted and shaped how I viewed and my fears kind of were a little bit irrational starting off. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:03:56]: Now, as I mentioned, you've got a few daughters and a number of sons that you've adapted as well. And I guess as you think about your daughters and raising your daughters into the women that they have become, what's been the hardest part of being a father to a daughter? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:04:11]: I think for me, probably the hardest part of being a father to daughter is just making sure I'm modeling to them what they want for their future spouse is I have to be intentional and present with my kids, but also intentionally and present with my wife and kind of model that. I know they're watching, especially now my daughter's 14, My adopted daughter's 25, and she's now married. So they're coming to us for wisdom and guidance, and I wanna make sure that I'm helping model what they're a princess and, like, they deserve the best and they deserve to be independent. They're gonna be independent and helping them develop self confidence. They need to have a dad in their corner that's cheering them on and an example to what it means to have a man in their life. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:05:00]: I mentioned that you're a busy guy. You're running a nonprofit. You work in a community college and working with students there. You are doing a lot of different things. You've got a large family as well where you're balancing all of that. Talk to me about balance and what you've had to do to be able to balance your professional life, your personal life, to be that dad that you wanted to be. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:05:21]: I guess when I think of the word balance, I don't necessarily know about if you're ever gonna balance it all out, but there is gonna be seasonality of certain things. So as I'm growing a business and then also building out a nonprofit, there is seasons where I have to be super intentional with that. And then there are seasons when like this summer, I'm just fully present with my kids. And one of the things that I've always tried to do is actually, as I go into my garage at home, there's a picture on the front and the driveway, as I go to park and it is a mental reset in my head that says, all right, this is my first ministry. This is my most important thing. This is my number one job is I don't get to just go home and just veg out. Even if I had a stressful conversation, stressful workday, have a bunch of deals undone, or I've had hard conversations. Like I have to get the reserve out of the tank and I have to reset my mind and say like, alright. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:06:14]: So it's like a visual representation as I'm walking into my house that I'm like, alright. First ministry engaged with my kids. And what I've learned is that, like, there are certain moments with kids that are more, like, are more critical than others. So like early in the morning when they're waking up 5 minutes of attentional time, 1 on 1 eating breakfast together around the dinner table, there's no tech. There is time to like, and in the evening, going to saying prayers or going to bed at night. That's a really critical moment for our family. And then we've also built into our schedule. Like we have tech free Sundays, so it's kind of unique. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:06:49]: We got 9 kids at home and they like technology just matches any other kid, but that's like a family day of like intentionality. I think there's been a shift with parenthood and fatherhood that it used to be like, Hey, in the old days, if you could just like make sure they're taken care of, that's great. Then it's the last probably 2 decades been like be a present father. But I think now I think that's halfway right. But I think now it needs to be like, now you need to be an intentional father, intentional to how you want them to develop. So for us, intentionality is critical. So for us, we do tech free Sundays. We have like a family breakfast. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:07:25]: We'll go to play ball or play basketball, and we'll do some kind of activity together and laugh. Have fun play together when parents and dads play with their kids, play with their daughters, that's like releases so much stress and brings bond and it develops like oxytocin in the brain. And it's very important for kids to feel bonded and safe. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:07:48]: So I mentioned that you have your 2 biological kids, you have 9 adopted kids. Tell me the story of moving into being a adoptive father and what that journey was like for you that made you and your wife decide that you wanted to move down that path? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:08:06]: So we had a one biological daughter, Brooklyn. She's 14 now. And then we always felt called. I worked in a shelter in graduate school, working with kids in coming out of jail or had didn't have families. And I just fell in love with that work and knew that that was part of our path. It's crazy. Even at, you're not really twenties, my wife and I knew like, Hey, we're going to be a foster parent someday, which is pretty abnormal. So when we started, after we had our first daughter, we opened up our license. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:08:31]: We've been foster grand for 15 years, have taken in, I would say about 15 kids and we had 4 for a little over 12 years ago, we had 4 kids under 4, which is a lot. And we had 2 biological kids and then 2 adopted kids and our life felt pretty good. I was working in a foster care group homes and there is a girl there though, she's 14 years old and she's was one of like very quiet and reserved and she was available for adoption. And I just kind of developed a bond with her. And my wife actually saw her on these websites that were talking about adoption and she kept pointing her out to me. And long story short, we just kind of felt called to take a leap. And we, we took her in as a 14 year old and she was the most shy reserved girl. She never played any sports in her life. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:09:16]: I remember her senior year, she, we finally convinced her to go on some kind of sports team and she did badminton. I was like, oh, sweet badminton. And if you've ever went to a badminton game or a, a match, it's quiet. And I didn't know the rules and she's hitting the birdie and hitting it over. And I'm just, we're just cheering her and all of our siblings just cheering her on like crazy. And we didn't know the etiquette of the of the sport at all. But what I was so proud is that her senior year, she's been quiet and reserved her whole life. We go to do the banquet and she got player of the year and we were so proud of her. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:09:53]: We have this mantra in our family and we, we say it over our kids. We think identity and language is really important for kids. So we say Pima, our daughter, you are strong, you are brave and you are kind, you are strong, you are brave, and you are kind. We say that's three things over and over again. In our business, we have them that says, you are strong, you are brave, you are kind. And so when she gets that payment, you are so strong. And like, or when she was nervous to go get her go to the community for the first time and go, Hey, I'm going to drive you up there, but you got to walk in. So dad, I can't do it. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:10:22]: Dad, I can't do it. No. Pima, you are strong. You are brave. Let's go. And she stepped out and did that. And I remember so vividly her freshman year, she was finishing up her community college test and she went across the street to go get something to eat. And she looks over and she sees this guy panhandling on the street and are panhandling it. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:10:41]: And she looks over and does a double take. And she realized she recognizes this guy, but he looks at her and he doesn't recognize her. She looks again, her heart starts to race and she says, dad, and it's her biological dad who's been an addict most of his life, is homeless on the street. And he said, do I know you? And he didn't even recognize her. And it just threw her in a spin. And that evening she comes home. We don't hear about this. She comes home and we're putting our younger four to bed and she's there with us. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:11:07]: And she tells my wife and I this story. And she's shaking and she's sitting to us and then just starts to cry. And we say, Pima, you are strong, you are brave, and you are kind. You are loved. You are a center. You are so important in trying to speak that over her where someone feels so insecure and feels like nothing. And for girls, that's very, very common. And I think a dad's role is to speak truth and treat, speak that identity over her. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:11:32]: And minutes later, she says, I want to put the kids to bed and she's never puts our kids to bed. So she runs upstairs, passes me by up the stairs and she runs up to my youngest son who's now 4 years old and she says, Maddox, she says, you are strong, you are brave and you are kind and you are going to college. And for me, she is now living into her identity and living into it and developing confidence because she's able to, to spur that onto other people. And for me, that's the role of a dad. It's the role of a foster parent. And that's a big moment for us. We have group homes and there was 5 kids that didn't have a family and our family was full. And long story short, we just kind of felt called to it. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:12:13]: And it was a 2 year old to a 13 year old. We sold our house 2 years ago, found a place that could fit everybody, reopen our foster license, and took in these 5 kids and adopted them all this summer. So that's been a whirlwind as well. So I feel like I've lived enough for 3 decades for sure in 20 years. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:12:30]: So you also run a nonprofit that helps to connect kids with families. And not only are you taking these kids into your own family and creating these opportunities for but you're also creating opportunities for other families as well. So talk to me about that and what drove you to create this nonprofit called Ohana that that is providing that, but also connecting these kids with other families. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:13:03]: One of our adopted sons, we always called him Stitch, like from the movie, Lilo and Stitch. She's like this wild terror alien baby thing. And we always called him Stitch to life. He's a lover and a terror. And there's a quote in the movie. It says, Ohana means family and family means no one's left behind or forgotten. And it was so significant for our family. That's why we started our nonprofit called Ohana. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:13:23]: And our belief is that every child deserves a family. Our belief is that a kid's past story doesn't define them. And what we have learned is that if a family is consistent and present, like any child's past hurts can be healed. So, we have kids who are available for adoption that we are trying to find forever families for. So we've adopted kids through that program, but we have about 90 kids that we serve and we have about 10 kids that get adopted every year, which is some of the biggest joy and awesome parts of the journey. And we try to equip parents that parents are like, oh, like when I was a young parent, I was like, I gotta be perfect and do this right. Even more so when you work as a foster parent. Oh, I gotta do this right. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:14:07]: Yeah. Throw that out the window. Show up, be present, love them well, and they'll be alright. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:14:12]: Well, and that's what I was gonna ask you was when you look at your whole family and how you parent your biological kids, your adoptive kids, I would guess I have 2 biological kids. I do not have adopted kids, but and I have not been a foster parent. But in my perspective, I would guess that you have to parent them the same way and you have to love them the same way. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:14:31]: Absolutely. Yeah. So I, you, and it's interesting that like kids that we have adopted, like they are part of our family, the love that we have, people like, how could you do that? How could you love, like, I don't know your heart just kind of grows. Like, it's like part of the calling of like the adoption and foster care. But yes, you have to, I think you have to adjust your expectations when you're having a foster adopted child. Some of my kids, my son was in 7th grade and he was reading at a 2nd grade level. Okay. I can't have the same expectations for him. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:15:00]: And some parents would be like, Hey, he needs to just focus on school. No sports. But I knew my kid had needed an outlet and he needed to move his body and needed to have something where he could have some wins and success. And for him it was soccer. So I made sure that he played soccer where my other kid says, Hey, if you have missing assignment, dude, you're not going to practice. But this kid needed to make sure that, so there is some, you have to adjust kind of your expectations and sometimes bonding takes more time, but they need love. Like my 25 year old daughter, she just still like, it took her forever to be able to hug and I didn't want to ever force it hug. But now she's like, first thing she does, she comes into my house and wants to give us the biggest hug and for an adopted child, that's a big deal. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:15:41]: Especially for a 14 year old black girl who doesn't know, and I was a 35 year old white guy. It felt off. It didn't feel comfortable for her. And I respected that. But now it's time it's like, no, we're family. Like we're love. Like the love is deeper than any thing that makes us different. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:15:59]: So if people are interested in being potential foster parents in the future, sometimes people think that this is a process that is really difficult and something that they don't wanna move down or they're scared because of some of the the things that kids may bring with them and what they have to be able to struggle with as a family, as they're bringing them into their family. What do you say to those people and how to get in or to work through some of the challenges that they may encounter in bringing foster kids into your family? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:16:35]: A couple things. 1, you have to, 1, adjust your expectations. 1, it's not about you. It's about the child. So that has to be reorient yourself. I work with a lot of families that wanna complete their family. And that's great. I respect that. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:16:46]: It can, that can be part of it. But also the primary thing is, like, I see this child and I want to make sure that they have hope and healing. That's gotta be foundation. But then there's also, like, just some people have been through it before. So I always reached out to people who have been in this before. Like, when we were struggling with our son and having behaviors, my god, what the what the crap do I do here? I asked people that knew. So there's, like, general words of wisdom is like, a, take younger than your kids that you have in your home. Take younger. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:17:15]: Because why? Because they will help guide the culture of what to expect for them. I wouldn't get a kid that's older than your biological children. And making sure that you know their history and are prepared for that is an important aspect as well. And then having other people in your corner. So for me, it's like, I always gotta have family. I gotta have family, friends. We have a family of friends that will take their kid for a night and just give us a moment to reset. Because you're like, oh, this is a lot, occasionally. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:17:43]: And having family to kinda help. Hey. Can you take the kids for a night so my wife and I so we can just have a chance to reset ourselves. And that was a big, big important thing. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:17:52]: Now we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5, where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Are you ready? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:18:00]: Yep. Gotcha. is fatherhood? Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:00]: In one word, what Dr. Ryan Senters [00:18:02]: Intentional. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:03]: When was the time that you finally felt like you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:18:08]: My 14 year old daughter, we went to a dad daughter dance, and she loved being the dad's princess and being with me all the time. And we have the 4 year old little girl and she's like, we need to make sure she comes too. And she taught her how to dance and do all this other stuff. So that was a really big win. And we also just had my wife's 40th birthday and my daughter did a toast to her and talked so many great things. And my son, like, prayed over and blessing over the whole night. So that was super humbling and great. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:36]: Now if I was to talk to your kids, how would they describe you as a dad? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:18:40]: I think they would say I'm fun. Love to play sport with the kids. I'm strict. They know that. And I'm a big believer that centers do hard things. So they know we do hard things together. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:51]: Now who inspires you to be a better dad? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:18:52]: My father-in-law for sure didn't have a dad, but he is a great picture of a dad for me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:18:57]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice. You've shared your story and talked about what you've gone through as a father yourself, or at least part of what you've gone through as a father yourself. As we finish up today, what's one piece of advice you'd wanna give to every dad? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:19:09]: Kinda go back. Fatherhood is more than just being present. Present is good. Present is is showing up to the game. It's maybe coaching once in a while. Maybe it's making sure you're not on your phone when your kids are talking to you present. That's awesome. But I think the next step of fatherhood is intentionality. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:19:26]: Intentionality is having a picture of what you want your family to be about. A picture of what you want your kids' lives to be about. I want my kids to be more generous. I want them to serve others. I want them to learn to do hard things. So what's the picture? And then intentionality is, like, creating opportunities and moments to do those things and naming those. So for us, it's like we have an intentional like, we wanna we're creating a ranch for kids with special needs. So for us, like, we do hard things. Dr. Ryan Senters [00:19:53]: So we're building our chicken coop, and we're all doing that together. My daughter, she's in a power of tools and making it happen. Why? Because I am teaching us, one, we do hard things and that we serve others. And I'm always pointing towards that So my kids can be reinforced that that is what we do. That's who we are more than just present. It's intentionality. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:12]: If people want to find out more about Ohana or about you, where should they go? Dr. Ryan Senters [00:20:17]: Yeah. So I have a podcast and I'm actually releasing one on fatherhood and parenthood, foster adoption, season this this fall. It's called Unleash Your Purpose, and you can look me up orioncenters.com, and ohanaaz.org is our organization. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:33]: Well, Ryan, I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for sharing your story today. Thank you for all that you're doing to be able to help connect kids with their forever families. And I truly wish you all the best. Ryan Senters [00:20:45]: Thank you. Thanks for having me on. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:46]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the dads with daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the fatherhood insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, And the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step roadmaps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly, dads like you. So check it out at fathering together dot org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week, all geared to helping you raise strong and empowered daughters and be the best dad that you can be. We're all in the same boat and it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time, We give the lessons. We make the meals. We buy them presents and bring your a game. Because those kids are growing fast, the time goes by just like a dynamite blast. Calling astronauts and firemen, carpenters, and muscle men, get out and beat the world to them. Be the best dad you can be.
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 2358: Jay and Heather Harrington discuss the pervasive influence of the "princess industrial complex" on young girls and the importance of countering it by encouraging outdoor play and exploration. They emphasize how nature fosters confidence, creativity, and family connection, helping girls grow into strong, self-assured women. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.lifeandwhim.com/first-moments-blog/antidote-to-the-princess-industrial-complex Quotes to ponder: "Nature is a place to be creative, imaginative, adventurous, and to step outside of comfort zones. That's what being a kid is all about." "There's nothing wrong with pink and princesses, but if that's all we expose young girls to then it has an impact on them. And it's not a positive one." "Time spent outside, exploring nature, is some of the best time to bond and connect as a family." Episode references: Last Child in the Woods: https://www.amazon.com/Last-Child-Woods-Children-Nature-Deficit/dp/156512605X Cinderella Ate My Daughter: https://www.amazon.com/Cinderella-Ate-My-Daughter-Dispatches/dp/0061711527 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com. Episode 2358: Jay and Heather Harrington discuss the pervasive influence of the "princess industrial complex" on young girls and the importance of countering it by encouraging outdoor play and exploration. They emphasize how nature fosters confidence, creativity, and family connection, helping girls grow into strong, self-assured women. Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.lifeandwhim.com/first-moments-blog/antidote-to-the-princess-industrial-complex Quotes to ponder: "Nature is a place to be creative, imaginative, adventurous, and to step outside of comfort zones. That's what being a kid is all about." "There's nothing wrong with pink and princesses, but if that's all we expose young girls to then it has an impact on them. And it's not a positive one." "Time spent outside, exploring nature, is some of the best time to bond and connect as a family." Episode references: Last Child in the Woods: https://www.amazon.com/Last-Child-Woods-Children-Nature-Deficit/dp/156512605X Cinderella Ate My Daughter: https://www.amazon.com/Cinderella-Ate-My-Daughter-Dispatches/dp/0061711527 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Fatherhood presents unique challenges and opportunities for growth, particularly when raising daughters. In this week's Dads with Daughters podcast, we welcome Don Manning or Crazy Cool Family delving deep into the realities of father-daughter relationships, providing valuable insights and practical strategies for dads committed to being the best they can be. Reframing Teenage Years Understanding and Embracing the Journey A common perception is that the teenage years are inevitably challenging. Dr. Christopher Lewis offers a refreshing perspective, suggesting that with the right approach, these years can be full of positive experiences and growth for both fathers and daughters. Central to this approach is the belief in the importance of a strong family belief system and a nurturing environment. By actively working to build relationships, fathers can play a crucial role in creating a supportive and understanding family dynamic. Personal Growth and Faith Dr. Lewis shares his personal journey, where his Christian faith and a wealth of parenting literature have significantly influenced his parenting style. The emphasis on feeling seen and heard in reversing trauma is a key takeaway, underscoring the importance of emotional availability and sensitivity to a child's needs. Creating a Family Culture Building a Network of Relationships The concept of building a family culture akin to a network of relationships is pivotal in maintaining strong family dynamics. Dr. Lewis emphasizes that this approach can create a cohesive unit where each member feels valued and understood. The ripple effect of this approach is evident in Lewis's own family, where their methodologies attracted interest from others, leading to the development of a curriculum, writing a book, and creating a ministry. Resources for Continuous Improvement Over time, their ministry has developed numerous resources, including parenting books, a podcast, interactive workbooks, and a daily email subscription, all aimed at helping dads improve their relationships with their children. These resources stress the importance of fathers becoming better listeners, more encouraging, and building trust with their children. Challenges for Modern Dads Technology and Connection Modern dads face unique challenges, notably the impact of technology on family connections and the lack of training in relationship-building. The podcast highlights the need for fathers to be proactive in carving out quality time with their children, away from screens and distractions. Spending Quality Time Intentional involvement in everyday activities, be it errands or special outings, is key to building strong bonds. Such consistent, quality time helps in understanding and connecting with each child's unique personality. Vulnerability and Self-Improvement Importance of Being Open and Transparent Both speakers agree that vulnerability—being open, transparent, and admitting faults—is crucial in forming stronger connections with daughters. This openness fosters a sense of trust and mutual respect, which is essential for a healthy father-daughter relationship. Focusing on Self-Improvement Dr. Lewis stresses that presenting the best version of oneself is more beneficial for children than focusing on their shortcomings. This perspective encourages dads to embark on a continuous journey of self-improvement, setting a positive example for their children. Parenting with Faith Over Fear Don Manning's Journey Don Manning shares his experience transitioning from parenting with fear to parenting with faith. Initially, fear led him to adopt a controlling style, which proved ineffective. Over time, Manning learned that building relational connections was far more impactful than merely enforcing rules. Encouragement and Trust Manning emphasizes that no single approach to parenting is always correct. The hardest part, he notes, is dealing with fear and learning to trust that his daughters will make the right choices despite the challenges they may face. This approach fosters a more relaxed and nurturing environment. Crazy Cool Family Mission Transforming Fatherhood Dr. Lewis discusses the mission of Crazy Cool Family, an organization aimed at helping parents improve their relationships with their children and become better versions of themselves. The ministry encourages fathers to be actively involved and continuously learn about parenting and relationships. Shared Experience and Reevaluating Beliefs Most men aspire to be good fathers but often lack the knowledge or vision to achieve this goal. Reflecting on their upbringing or external challenges, both speakers recommend reevaluating long-held beliefs about parenting and embracing new insights—such as Dr. Lewis's realization about teenage rebellion. Conclusion Fatherhood is a lifelong journey of learning, growth, and forming deep connections. By embracing vulnerability, prioritizing quality time, and committing to self-improvement, dads can navigate the complexities of raising daughters with confidence and grace. The insights shared by Dr. Christopher Lewis and Don Manning provide a roadmap for fathers striving to build strong, loving relationships with their daughters. TRANSCRIPT (Unedited transcript created by CASTMAGIC) Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to dads with daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:15]: Welcome back to the Dads with Daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters' lives, raising them to be strong independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. As always, you and I are on a journey together. I love being able to walk this path with you every week as we are talking about the thing that I know I'm most passionate about and I'm sure you're most passionate about, which is raising our daughters and raising them into being those strong, independent women that we want them to be in their lives. And I know in the path that I've been on, there have been so many dads that I've turned to to try and gain more perspective. Because I didn't know everything, And no dad knows everything. And as you walk into fatherhood, there's not one right manual. There's not one right way to father. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:08]: So it's so important that we as men are willing to step up and ask questions and listen and watch and learn, but be able to also take some tools from other people, put them in our own toolbox and be able to put them to work. And that's what this podcast is all about. It's all about helping you to find other resources, find other ways of doing things to be able to help you on this journey that you're on. That's why every week I bring you different guests, different people with different experiences that allow for you to be able to go on this path with others. Because we all have a journey to be on, and it's so important to be able to learn from others. And today we've got another great guest. Don Manning is with us today. And Don has been on a parenting journey for quite some time. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:00]: He's got 7 kids, 4 daughters, 3 sons, And he is a business owner. He's an investor. He has worked in real estate. He does a lot of different things, but he also has something called crazy cool family. And we're gonna be talking about that as well as him being a father himself, and I'm really excited to have him here. Don, thanks so much for being here today. Don Manning [00:02:24]: Yeah. Glad to be here. You said strong, independent women, and that's so I just laugh because that describes my 4 daughters to a t, and my wife too. I mean, I've got very we've got very strong independent women in our household, so it just that's funny when you said that. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:42]: I want to turn the clock back in time on you, and I know that you've got kids that range all the way from 34 on down. And your oldest 4 are your daughters. So I wanna go back to that first moment. That first moment that you found out that you were going to be a dad to a daughter, what was going through your head? Don Manning [00:03:00]: Well, first of all, so my wife brought our first daughter to the marriage. So I knew I was going to be a so I've got a blended family, you know, and so my wife then we had 3 girls and 3 sons together after that. So when we got married, my oldest daughter was 2. In some ways, I say I fell in love with her daughter and married the mom, but that's not really true. But I really had no idea. So I'd I was the youngest in my family. I'd never been around kids. And suddenly, I'm married, and I have this 2 year old, and I'm not her dad. Don Manning [00:03:36]: And so quick story, so you're talking about first memory. So Suzanne and I dated my wife, Suzanne, and I, we dated for a year before we got married. So we were you know, I was I was accustomed to Molly, our our oldest daughter. And so but we go on. We get married and and, we go on our honeymoon and we come back and I'm like, okay. Because Suzanne, you know, this was so typical of a dad. You know, I know how to parent better than she does. Right? And I've watched her parents, so I'm like, I can give her some advice. Don Manning [00:04:03]: You know? As we come into the house, new sheriff in town. We're gonna take over. We're gonna help her help my wife become a better parent. Right? That's that's kind of the the mantra I had coming in because I knew everything. And so the first night we get back home, and Molly's daughter would wake up in the middle of the night, and she there was 2 things. She would wake up and she would cry, and she had a a pretty sensitive gag reflex. So I walk up there, and and and when I was with Suzanne, she would tell me about how, you know, she would have to stay up with her all night. And I was like, hey, I'll help you with this because I think I can get her to go to sleep. Don Manning [00:04:39]: You know? Obviously, you know, again, I knew everything. I was so I walk up there. The first night, she's crying. Honey, let me handle this for you. And I walk up the stairs to the second to the bedroom where her crib was, and I said, Molly, you know, I don't have my shirt on because, you know, I'm 27 years old. I was in shape at that time. And, you know, so I walk up there and I'm just and I'm holding Molly out, and I just said, Molly, we you know, just gently I'm not being rude or anything, but just, Molly, we need to go to bed. You know, this is something we're gonna do. Don Manning [00:05:07]: And she looks at me and throws up all over me. And so that was my that was my initiation into marriage, into parenting the 1st night. And I'm like, I mean not I mean I don't have my shirt on so it's thrown up all over me. I'm going, oh my goodness this what is this life going to be? What is parenting? I was just so defeated at that point and so it got better after that. But that was my initiation into parenting right there. It's a little bit different than the hospital, but, that's where I was. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:05:40]: That's quite the induction into being a father. And, you know, one of the things that a lot of dads tell me, especially dads of daughters, tells me that there's some fear, some fear in not only becoming a father, but fear in being a father to a daughter. What would you say has been your biggest fear in raising your daughters? Don Manning [00:06:01]: Yeah. I totally agree, and it's been something that has I think getting away from fear, what I call it going from fear to faith, has revolutionized my parenting. I mean, you know, I tell dads a lot, you know, I speak to dads a lot in our ministry. Crazy Cool Family, what you're referring to is is our ministry we do now, and we'll talk about that later. But a lot of times when I talk to dads, I say, you know, realize at one time it was it was me and 5 women in my house. And one, there was a fear that I didn't understand these beings that and so what fear and really my fear was is that they wouldn't turn out well. That, you know, that they would be, you know, sexually active maybe or, you know, in negative ways, or they would be rebellious, or they would, you know, get that all the things you think about as a dad, they're gonna be addicted to drugs, they're gonna be, you know, not able to do relationships, and just all the things that that come out of it. And so and I'm a teacher at heart, so what I really focused on is helping them to obey and make sure they did what I said. Don Manning [00:07:05]: And I thought that was being a good dad, you know, that I could if I if I protected them and my fears led me to wanna protect and to teach and to tell them what to do. And when they didn't do it, I told them again, and I told them again, and I told them again. And, you know, so the the fear was really that they weren't gonna turn out well, and the way I responded to that was I just got onto them all the time. And that really didn't connect relationally, and I and over time, I just wasn't working, and I found they they avoided me. Some you know, they started they were a good relationship. I mean, I was involved in their lives, but it was still challenging as I my fear led me to do things that were not helpful in parenting. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:07:44]: And as you're talking about parenting, I know you have 7 kids, and parenting is never easy. There's always those ups and downs as you're raising your kids. They're always going to throw you through a loop. There's not one right way to parent, but there's gonna be times where things are gonna be good and things that times that are where things might be more challenging. What's been the hardest part in being a dad to a daughter? Don Manning [00:08:04]: I think one of the biggest challenges I've found is understanding the female and as a male understanding the female, and I've really done a lot of work with that to try to understand my daughters to to to really get to the bottom of their hearts. So they because I believe that belief and determines behavior, that how we believe and what we do determines who we are. And so rather than so often I felt like I was dealing with the surface, and the deeper I went with the relationship and the connection, the better my parenting got. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:08:37]: Now when you have so many kids you have 7 kids, so that's a lot of kids, you know, and a lot of things going on in that household. And with 4 daughters, one of the things that I guess that I would question for you is as a father, I know with 2 my 2 daughters, they're very different people. They have different personalities, and they bring different dynamics not only to the home, but also just to the ethos of the environment. And I have to be very intentional about understanding who they are, what they need, and who they are as individuals to be able to build those unique relationships. How did you build those unique relationships with your daughters? Don Manning [00:09:17]: No substitute for time. For example, I I tell dads a lot that when I was a young dad with young children, young daughters, one of the things I did was I just took them with me whenever I went somewhere. So if I went to Home Depot, I was gonna have a 3 year old girl with me, and I would take them out on certain dates. Like, we would just go and, you know, for example, we and it didn't have to always be just one child. You know, with 7, sometimes you have to do different things, but I would meet my buddy at Chick Fil A, and we would he had a couple kids. I had a couple kids with me, and and we would let them play, and and we would talk, and then but they would interact. And a lot of times we talk about it, Crazy Cool Family, it's along the way. There's a scripture that talks about in Deuteronomy where you do it when you lie down, when you rise up, when you're walking along the road. Don Manning [00:10:04]: It's like so often I think relationship is developed along the way. And if you just include your kids in your lives and you're included in their lives, there's a lot of you know, it may be in the car. It may be when they're going to bed at night. For example, I made sure that I my wife was at home with these kids, so she was exhausted by the end of the day. Bedtime was a big time for me, and I took jobs that didn't travel so I could be home at night. Decisions made like that helped me to make connections, deciding to include them in my life. And then the other thing I would say about that relationship is learning to be someone that asks questions. So often as dads we are in the lecture business. Don Manning [00:10:48]: We are, you know, we're efficient and we tell them what to do and we make sure that everything is taken care of. But in reality, the, the need is with especially with females again is to ask questions and to not tell them what to do but find out what's in their heart And that allows us to connect with them better. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:11:08]: In raising daughters, one of the things when you say about connecting to their heart, I think about the fact that I know that I've had to step back and really look at my own self to be able to better understand my daughters and know that they are going to be expecting of me things that I would not always expect of other men, of other people. And it's been a journey. And it's been something that I know that is not always an easy journey, but I've had to step back. I've had to be willing to explain when I'm wrong, explain and talk to them about and be a bit more vulnerable with them than so I think we're always programmed to be. Talk to me about vulnerability for yourself and how you've had to be vulnerable to be able to make those connections with your own daughters. Don Manning [00:11:59]: Yeah. The first thing I I love what you just said is that is you're talking about yourself first and how you change to be a better parent and a better person. One of the things we tell people a lot is the best thing that I can do for my family is to present my family the best version of me. That so often as dads, we wanna say, I need to improve my kid. My kid needs to improve. They need to do this better, and so often the real focus needs to be on us because, and, it's not just the connection, but our example to our children is more important than our instruction. Who we are with them, they see through the instruction to the person. They're gonna follow a whole lot more of who we are versus what we tell them. Don Manning [00:12:47]: And so I think that's a great what you just said is awesome that what can we do to be the best version of ourselves? And when we are vulnerable, when we are transparent is another way I like to put that is I find that my daughters would respond so much better to me. And again, just the the asking questions, the telling them, you know, realizing so often I think we need to we we need to show our daughters that we are perfect. And in reality, that's not the best way to parent in my opinion. It's you know, you're talking about there's not one method and that's so true, but there are concepts that do work well and one of those is to be transparent, is to be vulnerable, and to share with them things about your life that's going on as well as listen to things about them without being so judgmental. What does judgment come from? Judgment comes from fear. You know, our daughter tells us something and we are scared that they're gonna go down a path and so we want to stop them. We do it with the best intentions. The same way we don't tell them things about ourselves because we don't think they'll respect us or we don't think they'll like us. Don Manning [00:13:51]: We have things hidden in our hearts that we think are bad that we don't want anybody to see. But when we keep those in, they see them anyway. And so so often and so then we become kind of hypocritical to them and we lose respect. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:14:04]: So let's transition a little bit because you've been talking a little bit about your crazy cool family and the mission, the organization that you started to be able to help parents, help fathers, help mothers to be who they want to be. But talk to me about the the genesis of this and where you started this and where you are today. Don Manning [00:14:24]: Well, when I was 4 daughters, like I said, 5 women in my house. I wanna be a good father, you know, and honestly, I talk to men all over the country now with our ministry. I find that most men want to be good to great fathers. They really do. I think I rarely talk to a dad. He's like, you know, I don't really care about being a father. It's not real high on my priority list. I mean, do you see the same thing? Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:14:49]: I do. People want to be the best dads, but they don't always know how to. Don Manning [00:14:53]: Yeah. And maybe life is a little bit overwhelming or there's challenges in our life. Everything from work to even addictions to we didn't come from those type of homes. I also find that a lot of dads don't really have a vision for what family can be, and I didn't really either at that time. I'll give you an example. I was at a conference just a couple of weeks ago, and they're talking about well, even going back to a few many years ago, somebody said teenage rebellion does not have to happen. And my wife and I looked at each other, and we were like, wow. That really challenges our belief system because we have been brought up thinking that, oh, wow. Don Manning [00:15:32]: The teenage years are just gonna be so hard and it's, you know, it's always gonna be just almost a disaster and we never know what they're gonna do and, you know, just all the things. And at this conference I was at a couple weeks ago, there was a lot of people talking about that. Well, I wanted to tell them I didn't get a chance. I wasn't my I was just participating in it, but I wanted to tell them, guys, hey. It doesn't have to be like that. What if your belief system is that that teenagers are fun and teenagers are gonna be a a delight to your family? Well, so years ago, I'm I'm probably 10 years into this journey and I'm going, you know what? I wanna I wanna be my best, and I wanna you know, in effect, I'm a competitive guy, and I just said, I wanna win at family. I'm gonna put a lot of time, effort, and energy into this. And what does winning at family look like for our family? And so we're a we're a Christian based organization, Christian family, and we said we want our kids to have great faith. Don Manning [00:16:31]: We want us to have we want them to have great relationships with us. We want them to make wise decisions. We want them to follow our faith and be able to choose that. We want them to have the choice but be able to choose that. And and I was like, how do I get there? And so what happened was is that we just started to study a lot of things within the church as well as other authors and people, and it was really interesting to me that it was all over the board that the parenting literature and advice and things were all over the board. But we found that as for our 7 kids, it's kind of going back to what we said before, that when we connected the people who were having success and this was either faith based or not faith based. I'm reading a book right now about the effect of trauma on children and it is amazing and they say that even trauma can be reversed if a child has parents or other parents first or other people that are relationally connected in their lives, if they feel like they are seen and heard. And so we found that true in our family that the connection was so important and that the culture we were building in our family was super important. Don Manning [00:17:41]: We needed almost like building a greenhouse in our home for the relationships. I look at family as a now, as a network of relationships, And so goes that network, so often so goes our family. And so we started to focus on that and then over time, our kids started to really again, the girls and the boys started to really respond to that. And when you, you know, Christopher, when you have 7 kids and they're good kids, people start asking you what you're doing because they and they really were. We had a good relationship with them because we focused on that. They had good relationships with each other for the most part, and they were confident kids that were not and they weren't valedictorians and they weren't the star athletes. It wasn't about that. They just they just radiated a confidence in their lives, and and and our family kinda was was becoming a little bit set apart. Don Manning [00:18:34]: And this was honestly, a lot of it was in our church, and people started asking us, hey. Would you show us what you're doing? And because, you know, just like we did, we we talked to a lot of successful families what we And so that led to us just teaching younger families in our church and developing a curriculum which eventually led to writing a book, and now we have a ministry. And we're a Christian ministry, but we really focus on how to build connections within your home, that family network of relationships, and how to build that culture where we just believe if you build well on the inside, you can handle anything on the outside. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:10]: And I know you have a number of resources that you've created over some time, and one is a podcast, and you've got some workbooks. Talk to me about some of the resources that you've created and what you're trying to accomplish through the different means that you're trying to engage with people? Don Manning [00:19:28]: We started out with our book, Crazy Cool Family. We've written now 7 parenting books that are on Amazon. Everything from our workbooks to certain little what we call microbooks, which are very, like, very issue based. It's just short, little, quick reads. You can go to Amazon and type in Don and Suzanne Manning or Don Manning or whatever. I haven't figured out yet how to make Amazon link it to Crazy Cool Family yet because it's because we're the authors of the books. But so usually, I tell people to go to Amazon and type in Don Don Manning, and you can see all of our resources there. But, basically, we started out with a book, and then at that time, we started out with a podcast. Don Manning [00:20:06]: We were just talking. Both of us have about 250 episodes. We've been doing we've been doing ours about this is this is season 6 of our podcast. So, and we do it about once a week. So there's lots of resources in that podcast. So we've talked about we've got different guests or sometimes Suzanne and I just talk or we've talked with our kids sometimes. Lots of different resources there. And then this year we came out with what I'm really excited about is what we call our 2 guides, which are basically just 2 6 session workbooks. Don Manning [00:20:36]: It's very interactive. They're only hard copy because you get to journal in them and really go through them, and they're available on Amazon and but those two manuals together, there's, like, 12 sessions in both manuals together. They create this comprehensive guide to giving you the key concepts to how to connect everyone in your family and how to build that culture in your home. All the resources kinda have the same theme. They're just different delivery systems for them. And then the last thing I'll tell you is is we also have a daily email that we can you can subscribe to on our website, crazycoolfamily dotcom. It's a couple of minutes a day. It's it's again, it's faith based as our ministry is, but it's a it's a quick clip every day. Don Manning [00:21:17]: You can read it in 2 minutes or less just about to kinda drip our concepts into dads and moms about how to connect with their kids and how to connect everyone in their family and they build unity and culture in their homes. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:21:31]: Now you've worked with a lot of dads over the years, I'm sure. And with the conversations that you're having, but whether it be in person or through other means, what are some of the biggest struggles that some of the men that you're talking with are dealing with? And how are you helping them to be able to move through those challenges? Don Manning [00:21:51]: I think the biggest challenge that men face today is the technology and the culture that are out there. And it is difficult to connect with our kids when all they wanna do is get on their phone. And I think that and the secondary you know, the corollary to that is is that as dads, we're usually not well trained in how to reach our kids. We're not really well trained in the relationship arena. And when you combine the technology that's separating all of us with that we're not trained with the relationships, then a lot of dads are having trouble with that connection piece with their children and so and also with their wives. And so we do a lot towards helping dads learn to become better listeners, more encouraging, more inspiring. You know, so many dads are, oh, they're on their phone all the time. I can't talk to them, and when I do, I feel like I'm getting on to them all the time. Don Manning [00:22:49]: Well, there's different ways to overcome that. And we focus a lot to help dads learn how to build trust with their kids, build relationship with their kids. And really, so many dads, it's not really that fun being a dad. Well, it can be. It can be a lot of fun with the right attitudes and concepts, and we try to help them do that. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:23:07]: So you've been doing this now for quite some time. And as you look at the future, where is Crazy Cool Family going? Don Manning [00:23:15]: Great question. I what we find is learning to be a parent does not happen in days weeks. It doesn't happen in a weekend seminar. It happens over months years. As parenting is a long term game, it's something and, you know, I I really challenge dads a lot to become learners. I was with a dad just, you know, a few weeks ago, and blended family had come together. They had 6 kids between them, had been married for a few years. And I challenged those dads, you know, at that conference to be learners. Don Manning [00:23:46]: You know, what what are you doing to learn about being a dad and and to to improve your dad's skills? And he goes, you know, he goes, man, I'm in IT, and I'm always learning about technology. He goes, I on the side, I'm a personal trainer, and I'm always learning new things about personal training neck techniques and and nutrition and things like that and and weightlifting and aerobics. He said, I've never thought about learning to be a dad. And I'm like, I'm glad you came because, you know, now he's got a new focus. I said, how do you expect to be a great dad if you never learn? And the way you learn to be a dad is not by reading one book. It is by consistently putting input in over the course of years. And then just like anything else, you know, Steph Curry didn't learn how to shoot the jump shot he has today in in a weekend. He learned it over months years and and continual practice. Don Manning [00:24:37]: And that's what we try. That's where Crazy Cool Family is going with our daily email, with our materials. We want to kinda we want to be a a part of a man's life and a family's life for years as we drip our content into them so that those parents can learn over time to become excellent at the most, and arguably the most important thing we'll ever do in our lives. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:24:59]: No. It is so important, and I appreciate you sharing that. Now we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5, where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Are you ready? Don Manning [00:25:09]: Yeah. Absolutely. I feel like I'm on jeopardy or something. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:13]: In one word, what is fatherhood? Don Manning [00:25:15]: Relationship. It's connection. I think the most important thing we can do in fatherhood is connect. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:21]: Now when was the time that you finally found that you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Don Manning [00:25:26]: I don't know that I've found that yet. I I think with every daughter, it was different. There's different times that I won their heart. But I think that when I feel like there's trust in the relationship and there's interaction, there's a bridge that I feel like I've crossed with each daughter and with my wife too, where we trust each other. Dr. Christopher Lewis[00:25:47]: Now, if I was to talk to your kids, how would they describe you as a dad? Don Manning [00:25:52]: It's interesting. My younger kids would have described me as an intense, teaching, challenging dad. My older kids would describe me as still intense, but more encouraging. And I would say they probably describe me as involved, that I coached all their sports teams. I, loved to connect with them, and I think they would describe it as involved. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:26:15]: Who inspires you to be a better dad? Don Manning [00:26:17]: Jesus. I don't want that to be trite, but I believe that the best example of being a father is God. And when Jesus was baptized so Jesus is 30 years old. He has not started his ministry yet. He has done nothing of importance. He's he's a carpenter, basically. And he gets baptized, and God says something to him when he comes up out of the water. He says, this is my son whom I love. Don Manning [00:26:42]: In him I am well pleased. And I ask dads this a lot, and I ask myself this question. Do my children believe that I believe that about them? You know, this is my I own you. I claim you. Not I own you, but I claim you. I love you and I'm pleased with you. I'm delighted in you. I think you're amazing. Don Manning [00:27:01]: Is that what our kids think? And that's the best model of parenting I've ever seen. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:27:07]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice today, things that you learned along the way, things they've learned from other parents and other fathers. As we're finishing up today, what's one piece of advice you want to give to every dad? Don Manning [00:27:18]: Be a learner. I mean, if one of the things is is that I tell dads this a lot that if you could have seen me as a dad at year 5 and you would see my kids today. You would be like, there's no way. There's no way that could happen because I was there was so much I had to learn. And, honestly, I started out I wasn't very good at being a dad. I mean, I tried hard because that was kind of a mantra of my life. I am a hard worker, and I do like to I'm motivated, and I'm I'm not lazy. But, man, I just messed it up a lot, especially with my young girls. Don Manning [00:27:53]: And so I would tell dads to be a learner and to learn about themselves as well as a learner about relationships because the the cool deal about this deal with fatherhood is we can all be amazing. I believe every dad can be amazing. I believe every relationship with every child can be amazing. There's things we need to learn and it's not easy, but it is possible. And I want to tell dads that you can win and it's worth winning. It is so fun to do family when things are going well and it is so difficult when things are not going well. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:28:29]: Well, Don, I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for sharing your story today, for sharing the journey that you've been on, but also the journey that you've been on to help other parents in many different ways. If people wanna get a hold of you or find out more about you, where should they go? Don Manning [00:28:44]: Crazycoolfamily.com is our website. And then just if they wanna email me directly, it's it's don at crazycoolfamily.com. I hear from dad and parents all over the country with different questions and things, and our resources are all there. I would really challenge them to sign up for our daily email because we not only do a daily email, but we also tell you of things that we're doing to help you go further with your fathering and parenting journey. And so that would be the place to start out with is connect with that daily email. Promise you, it's a quick read, and you'll be encouraged and inspired to be your best. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:29:18]: Well, Don, thanks again for being here today, and I wish you all the best. Don Manning [00:29:21]: Thanks for having me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:29:22]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the fatherhood insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, and the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step roadmaps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly, dads like you. So check it out at fathering together.org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week all geared to helping you raise strong and powered daughters and be the best dad that you can be. We're all in the same boat and it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time. We give the lessons. We make the meals. We buy them presents and bring your a game. Because those kids are growing fast. The time goes by just like a dynamite blast. Calling astronauts and firemen, carpenters, and musclemen. Get out and be the world to them.
The Journey of Being a Dad Fatherhood is a journey filled with joy, challenges, and continuous growth. On the latest episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we sit down with Damien Moore, a dedicated father and founder of Dad's Daily Digest. Through their engaging conversation, Damien shares heartfelt experiences, invaluable insights, and practical advice for fathers striving to raise resilient and compassionate children. Preparing for the Unexpected The Impact of COVID-19 on Fatherhood Damien Moore's journey into fatherhood coincided with an unprecedented global event—the COVID-19 pandemic. His daughter was born just six weeks before the world shut down. As a budding freelance professional, Damien faced the harsh reality of job loss while also navigating the new terrain of fatherhood amidst a pandemic. The absence of his family in the crucial initial months underscored the emotional strain many new parents faced during this period. "There's no parenting tips or books that tell you how to parent during a pandemic," Damien states, highlighting the uncertainty that clouded the early days of his fatherhood journey. Despite these challenges, Damien found solace and support in technology, enabling constant communication with his family through virtual platforms. This adaptability and reliance on a support network became a cornerstone of his approach to parenting during these trying times. Addressing Mental Health: A Family Affair Understanding and Managing Anxiety Both Damien and his wife come from families with a history of mental health challenges, making them acutely aware of the importance of mental well-being. Recognizing early signs of anxiety in their daughter, they took proactive steps to understand and address her needs. From withholding toileting behaviors to being easily startled, these manifestations of anxiety required a sensitive and informed approach. "We adapt as parents based on our kids' personalities," shares Damien, emphasizing the need for a tailored parenting approach that considers individual differences. Damien's candidness about his own mental health struggles and his decision to seek therapy underline the importance of self-awareness and the willingness to seek help. By sharing these experiences, he sets a powerful example for other fathers, encouraging them to prioritize their mental health for the benefit of their families. Building a Supportive Community The Birth of Dad's Daily Digest Inspired by personal experiences and a desire to support other fathers, Damien launched Dad's Daily Digest—a platform aimed at providing advice, sharing stories, and fostering a supportive community among fathers. The alarming rise in suicide rates during the pandemic, particularly among men, motivated Damien to create a space where fathers could find solace, encouragement, and practical tips on navigating the complexities of parenthood. "If I just touch one person and inspire one individual... that's all that matters to me." Through this platform, Damien hopes to tackle the stigma around mental health and provide a lifeline to fathers who might be struggling in silence. His unwavering commitment to making a positive impact, even if it's one person at a time, speaks volumes about his dedication to this cause. Lessons in Empathy and Compassion A Beautiful Gesture In a touching anecdote shared on the podcast, Damien recounts a moment with his daughter that encapsulates the essence of the lessons he strives to impart. While at a McDonald's drive-thru, his daughter's simple yet profound act of kindness towards a homeless individual demonstrated the values of empathy and generosity that Damien and his wife instill in her. "Her gesture was just so beautiful… it nearly brought me to tears." These moments of heartfelt connection not only reinforce the principles Damien values but also highlight the significant impact that nurturing a compassionate environment can have on a child's development. Looking Towards the Future Hopes and Aspirations As Damien continues to build Dad's Daily Digest, his ultimate aspiration is to become a motivational speaker, sharing his journey and insights on a larger scale. By doing so, he hopes to inspire and support more fathers in their quest to raise strong, compassionate daughters while also navigating their own personal challenges. In concluding his conversation with Dr. Christopher Lewis, Damien leaves listeners with a powerful piece of advice: put life into perspective, recognize your blessings, and approach each day with gratitude. These principles not only shape his parenting philosophy but also serve as a guiding light for fathers everywhere striving to be the best they can be. This comprehensive blog post captures the essence of the podcast episode, featuring key anecdotes and insights shared by Damien Moore, ultimately providing valuable guidance and motivation for fathers navigating the beautiful yet challenging journey of parenthood. TRANSCRIPT (Unedited transcript created using CASTMAGIC) Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to Dads with Daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:16]: Welcome back to the Dance with Daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters' lives, raising them to be strong, independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. And every week, I love being able to sit down, talk to you, work with you as you are trying to be the best dad that you wanna be. And as you are trying to raise your daughters into those strong independent women that all of us want for our kids. And I so appreciate that you come back every week to be able to learn, to grow, to be willing to hear the stories of others, and to be able to take those stories and be able to turn them into action. Because it is important. It's important to be able to be willing to listen and to learn and to know that none of us have all the answers. None of us are perfect ads, and nobody has the handbook in regard to what it means and what it takes to be the perfect dad. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:16]: There's lots of different ways to father, lots of different ways to be a dad. And you can learn along the way if you're open to it and you're willing to listen and learn from others. That's why this podcast exists. Every week, I bring you different people, different dads, different individuals with resources that can help you to be that dad that you wanna be. And today, we got another great guest with us. Damian Moore is with us. And Damien is a father and also is has has a resource out there called Dad's Daily Digest. So we're gonna be talking about both of those aspects, getting to know him a little bit more, and I'm really excited to have him here. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:53]: Damien, thanks so much for being here today. Damien Moore [00:01:54]: Thank you so much for having me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:56]: Well, I'm really excited to have you here today. And I always start these episodes with an opportunity to turn the clock back in time. I'd love to go back. I know your daughter is 4 and a half, and I would love to go back and might be 4 and a half years, could be 5a half years. But I wanna go back to the very first moment that you found that you were going to be a dad to a daughter. What was going through your head? Damien Moore [00:02:18]: Yeah. So I was actually in the UK at the time. I found out the gender. My wife called me. I was visiting family. I'm originally from the UK and France, and I got the call. And it was just ecstatic. I mean, it's you know, I think as a guy, I I always thought, you know, I'd like to have a little boy. Damien Moore [00:02:35]: But I've always friends of mine who have actually many of my friends had daughters before me. And they, you know, told me just how precious it was and how special it was to have that kind of daddy daughter bond. So, I mean, I was absolutely ecstatic to find out that news. And, yeah, to this day, it's just the greatest feeling, and bond is so true, and I've just loved every minute so far. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:55]: Now I talked to a lot of dads, and and a lot of dads and daughters talk to me about the fact that walking into fatherhood can be scary in general, just being a father, because we don't know always what we're getting into. But being a father of a daughter sometimes brings its own fears. What would you say has been your biggest fear in raising a daughter? Damien Moore [00:03:14]: I think, as you say, I obviously t to raise a confident, independent girl, one that kind of can can take on the world in her own way. Take on the world in her own way. I don't wanna, you know, control her too much. I wanna her to understand that the world is is a fluid and flexible place that you can kind of embrace in many different ways. And I think being raised by a a very kind of strong mother, you know, she instilled kind of positivity in me every day and just to kind of really embrace the world ahead of us and challenges and and opportunities. And I think I just wanna give her that opportunity every day that life is a beautiful thing and it's embrace every day with kind of open arms. There will be challenges. There will be tough times, and it's how you best prepare them for those moments in life when they one day leave the nest. Damien Moore [00:03:56]: You know, we have a role as parents to be there for their whole lives until we die, but when they're here at home with us, when we're raising them, we have a responsibility to kind of, you know, keep them safe and make sure that they understand and and teach them in in a in a in a way that's not too I wouldn't say too controlling, but in a way that kind of allows them to understand the world up, you know, outside of the house and be best prepared as possible. Because life can be tough. You know? Life throws all sorts of challenges. And for me particularly, you know, I had my daughter 6 weeks before COVID closed down the world and went through a really personal tough time during that moment because my own family couldn't visit my daughter. Basically, 16 months. They didn't meet her until she was 16 months old, and as a new dad, particularly wanted to celebrate this moment. This was like something you dream of. You celebrate the birth of your first child with your parents, with your your siblings, and it was really tough. Damien Moore [00:04:44]: They they were 1 week away from coming to America, and then the borders closed, and it was kind of a there's no, like, parenting tips or books that tell you how to parent during a pandemic. It's like, that doesn't exist. So, you know, my wife and I kind of went through the motions of, like, wow, this is actually happening. The world's shutting down. We have a 6 week 6 week old daughter. I was actually freelancing at the time and lost my job as well. So it all happened at a very, very stressful moment, like and it was, like, gonna be this most beautiful thing ever, and it was. Like, you know, the first few weeks was, like, incredible. Damien Moore [00:05:14]: You know, we've got dogs at home. It's like the dogs are super happy to have this new baby at home, but then the world shut down, and we had to kind of really adjust and figure life out as new parents during a COVID pandemic. And I think those life learnings for me just reiterate how we can best prepare our kids for the unexpected and for, you know, just to be best prepared for the real world. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:05:34]: Definitely a challenging time, and COVID threw us all through a loop in many different ways. But being able to have a child right at the beginning and not being able to allow for your family and others to be able to interact. How did you have to pivot, especially losing a job, having a new child, just a couple of stressors in that situation during that pandemic? How did you pivot to be able to make the most of what you had, but also be able to move forward with being a father and moving into a new job and and other things as well. Damien Moore [00:06:12]: Yes. I mean, thankfully, even now during COVID and and now, my wife's family is very close to us. So thankfully, we had her support network. So we had her mom, her brothers, and other wider family members around us. So we had that support, which was very needed at the time. Now for me, personally, I I did struggle not having my mom, my dad available right next door. So we're blessed today to have great technology, so FaceTime was critical. You know, we did a lot of FaceTiming, and it's amazing how, you know, from just an early age, how much these children pick up and learn and they recognize faces. Damien Moore [00:06:45]: So the first time my daughter met my mom when she was 16 months old, she wasn't a complete stranger because she she did recognize her through the FaceTime interaction. So we're lucky today to have that type of technology to stay in touch with members of our family despite the distances. I mean, moving to America, I always knew, you know, building a life here and having a family here would always be different than what I was raised with because I was raised with family members very close to me in the UK. But I knew I was kind of giving, you know, distance between me and my family, so I always knew that my parents always have a different relationship with my daughter than my my brother's daughters who live in the UK. And I was okay with that because I know technology is great today to kind of stay in touch. I mean, from a professional standpoint, on the job side, it was a rough few months. I personally am very I'm kind of an extrovert. I love being around people. Damien Moore [00:07:30]: I love socializing. So COVID was tough on that side of my own kind of mental challenges. I I was obviously locked at home a lot, so I decided to actually become a waiter during that time. I done waiting very early on in my in my teens, but I decided to become a waiter to kinda get myself out of the house so I could put my mental being in a better place. So at home, I wasn't so stressed and anxious and cooped up in the house. Being a waiter allowed me to get out of the house, socialize with people, it just gave me a better, like, headspace for myself. So I did that for about 8 months. As well as, obviously, it provided some sort of revenue for the family. Damien Moore [00:08:03]: Not not obviously huge, but it gave me something to kind of keep going. So, I mean, that's how I pivoted during those times. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:08:09]: You went through some challenging times at the very beginning. You moved into where you are today. Throughout your time in raising your daughter. It's not always going to be positive moments or easy moments. There's definitely challenges along the way. What's been the hardest part in being a father to a daughter? Damien Moore [00:08:27]: So I think it's adapting to their personalities. They're, you know, they're little unique humans, and I got parented one way. My wife got parented another way. So for me, even those cultural differences from America and the UK, vastly different the way we were parented. So I've had to just adapt. And I've actually embraced the way my wife's parenting style, which is very, I would say, kind of open door policy, very family orientated. It's not to say that I wasn't brought up family orientated, but it's it's just a different style here, and I've actually really embraced it the way we've kind of oriented our child. Both on my wife's side and my and my side, we've kind of come from families with that suffer from depression and and anxiety, and we know this is hereditary. Damien Moore [00:09:06]: So we we're kind of aware and very conscious about that with our daughter, what kind of traits will she pick up from that, and she is a very anxious toddler. From a very young age, she would withhold, and withholding is when children obviously don't have much control over anything is when they withhold going to the toilet. So withholding their poo, so it's that can be quite stressful for a toddler, you know. They go 2 or 3 days without going to the toilet. And as a parent, we have to start, you know, pivoting and taking care of this because it can get quite serious if there's not she doesn't relieve herself. So we noticed these traits very early on and we kind of read up about it and it's it's typical anxiety within toddlers. And to this day, there's traits we see today. She's very easily startled, for example. Damien Moore [00:09:44]: So growing up and even like when she was 2, 3 years old, I work in the basement here at home sometimes. And if I just come up through the basement door, she'd easily be startled terrified, absolutely terrified, running, like screaming because a noise startled her. So we've had to really adjust the kind of how we parent her in a way that's kind of, I'd say, really conscious to that to her anxiety, and we make sure that she feels as safe as possible and that we're here. We're here for her. We're here to talk to her. We're here to listen to her. Just to understand those fears and kinda parent her in a way that's, not as I said earlier, not too controlling on her because she needs that control. She's like anxious, so she wants to control situations and she wants to kind of get through them in in her way and and manage it in her way. Damien Moore [00:10:24]: And I think, you know, we have to learn from our kids as well. Even from a very early age, we adapt as parents based on our kids' personalities. And while she has these anxious moments, she's also just an absolutely beautiful soul. I mean, she's just a delight to be around. She's a lot of fun as well. She likes to dance and giggle and all that. So it's just managing those different personality traits very early on. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:10:44]: So talk to me a little bit about mental health and some of the things that you just were talking about. The fact that, you know, you come from a family that has battled mental health issues. Your wife has as well. You're dealing with your own things that you are working through, whether it's things that you have had that you've brought with you through your own upbringing and your familial ties or the own your own issues that you're dealing with, and you're starting to see those things in your own child. Talk to me about what you've had to do thus far as you've worked with your own child to work through some of these? And what are some of the things that you think that you're going to have to do based on what you're seeing now and what you think may happen, seeing that she's only 4a half at this point? Damien Moore [00:11:33]: Both my wife and I, we both have, as I said, family history in in kind of depression and anxiety. And I was raised around that as a as a young child, and, my parents got divorced when I was about 6 years old. And, you know, as a child, you're not really aware of what's happening at that age. But as an adult, I've kind of really started questioning it and talking to my dad who suffers from depression to get his side of the story. I wanna understand from him what he went through at literally my age now. You know, he went through a divorce. He had 3 boys. And I was just I wanted to understand the stresses and pressures that he was under because when I went through COVID, as I said, a new dad lost my job. Damien Moore [00:12:07]: I had my own kind of battles at that time. So he was a great resource for me to talk to. He really kind of helped just explain things to me in certain ways that I was challenging my own self. So he was great to kind of be a a kind of a a person of of resource for me personally during some really difficult times. I think, you know, for our daughter, there are obviously child therapists out there that we, you know, we wanna potentially engage with at some point soon. We've noticed some of these behaviors have died down a little bit, like the the the startling doesn't happen as much now as it used to when she's 2 or 3 years old because some of the things that she just gets used to, her her surroundings and her environment. But we're aware that you know, we constantly talk, my wife and I, about these you know, about the kind of our upbringings and and how this may influence our daughter and and just very conscious and aware of her behaviors. And we're just lucky today, I think. Damien Moore [00:12:54]: You know, mental health is so much more prominent and so much more spoken. There's more visibility around it today than there was when my parents were growing up. When I spoke to my dad, I remember him saying to me, if he was having a down day, people would just say nip it in the bud, get on with your day kind of thing. That was the attitude. But today, people are so much more conscious about it. You know, companies have better kind of mental health, kind of resources available. So we're definitely lucky in that instance that we can have that access to great resources. I myself have actually personally started therapy for the first time in the last couple of months. Damien Moore [00:13:23]: I've never had therapy. I've never kind of felt the need of therapy. My wife's had therapy her entire life. So I've just wanted to kind of explore that for myself as an avenue just to kind of speak to someone else, speak to an independent individual that's not kind of part of, you know, my network of family and friends and not my wife's network of family and friends. And I've always just, you know, from the first session or 2, I've actually found it quite liberating just sharing stuff with someone I don't really know. And as I said, I've never done it before, so I'm kinda learning my own ways through therapy. And, you know, we'll tackle that with our daughter when we feel like we need to. We've got, obviously, her doctor we talk to a lot about. Damien Moore [00:13:56]: We ask her a lot of questions about certain things that, you know, we've noticed, and she gives us great advice already. So, yes, we take it day by day for now. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:14:03]: And it's all you can do. And I know that with all of those experiences, you got motivated. You got motivated to try to start having these conversations with other men, with other fathers, to be able to help individuals through a new venture called Dad's Daily Digest, the blog TikTok that you're trying to engage people to talk to people inspire people in different ways. Talk to me about Dad's Daily Digest Outside of what I just said, what were some of the impetuses for why you wanted to move in this way to be able to engage with other men in this way? Damien Moore [00:14:39]: The real motivation, my uncle committed suicide when I was probably my early twenties. I've had a friend commit suicide as well through alcohol abuse. Again, I was in my mid twenties when that happened. So I've been exposed to suicide, and I know the effects it hap it has on families. And when COVID hit, I started seeing the suicide rates going up. You know, you read about it in the news, you see it, and it disproportionately affects men. And I think last year, I think it was about 50,000 people commit suicides in the US alone last year. I think 80% of those were men. Damien Moore [00:15:10]: Now these statistics are alarming. And, you know, having gone through it with my uncle and knowing, you know, the pain and and it causes families is I wanted to create a platform of of sorts to, I guess, inspire people and also just maybe give tips and advice on life, having been through these experiences myself and knowing what it does to families. So I've started this, as you say, Dad's Daily Digest, where I wanted to share some of my own struggles I've gone through from my professional career to my personal life. And I said to myself, even if I just touch one person and inspire one individual from potential changing their mind on the way they go in life, that's all that matters to me. I'm not here to, like, change the whole world, but it's like I wanna make a little dent in that space. I wanna inspire men and be a resource of some sort of resource and maybe give tips and advice through that platform, and just to show that life is tough. I mean, we go through struggles, but you can persevere and you can really kind of rely on others. And I am very lucky. Damien Moore [00:16:10]: I know I'm very lucky that I've got a great network around me. I've really got a supportive family. I've got a supportive wife, and I've got her family that support me. So I know I'm blessed to have that, and I know some people don't have that necessarily. So if they just reach out through a platform and just wanna get ask a question or have a concern, I wanna be someone there potentially to help them. I just you know, as I said, even just touching one person's life would be would mean a lot to me. I've just started creating this platform just to kinda get content out there and be a bit more of a voice in that space to hopefully inspire other men. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:16:41]: Now you've just started this platform. You're starting to get words out there. What are you finding thus far in the conversations that you're having with people that you're interacting with? Damien Moore [00:16:49]: It's been actually quite lovely. I've actually came to a few dads who have similar TikTok channels, and I think it's just relatable. We you know, obviously, each family is unique in the way they bring their their children, but there's so much we can relate to, so many similar funny situations, stressful situations that you go through being a parent. So it's nice to know that there's a community of us out there in that space, giving this kind of motivation, inspiration for others. So it's nice to know that you're not alone out there, kind of, trying to do this. There are other people out there. I mean, even yesterday, I posted a video. My daughter did this really touching thing, and I just had to share it in the moment. Damien Moore [00:17:24]: I was taking her through to a Happy Meal at McDonald's, and we got approached by a homeless person at the window. Now I could see he really needed help, and he was actually you know, he didn't come too close to my window. He saw I had a young child, but he slowed a certain distance, and then he said, you know, I don't want money, I just want food. So I said, absolutely. What would you like me to get you? I'm putting the order in. He goes, just a burger and a bottle of water. So I said, absolutely. I'll get you a burger and a bottle of water. Damien Moore [00:17:46]: And my daughter reached over to give him a dollar bill because she likes to pay the person now at McDonald's money, she likes to do the kind of transaction. So she had this dollar bill in her hand, she gave it to him, and then he brought him to tears and then he brought me to tears because I was like, this gesture was just so beautiful, and even that post alone has kind of really reiterated that people just how beautiful these little moments. I mean, these children are so innocent, and it's just you know, I then had a whole conversation with her about homeless people because she wasn't you know, she was like, who is that person, daddy? Like, what what is he doing? And, you know, she wasn't used to this interaction with with a homeless person. So I come out to explain to her that homeless people are unfortunate individuals that don't have a home. We and I said, we're really lucky. We go to a home. We have a warm bed to sleep in. We can shower. Damien Moore [00:18:30]: And she even asked me, she goes, how does he shower? So, you know, she was really inquisitive about this individual. So I had to kind of, you know, explain to her, unfortunately, there are people out there that don't have homes and don't have families, and it's, you know, really tough on them. So and that's why I said to her. I said, your generosity was just so beautiful, Jessa, and it was so beautiful, and I just thanked her for that moment because I just, yeah, it got it nearly nearly brought me to tears. So I think, you know, and just seeing the the reaction to that video alone was just really nice, People kinda really sharing, like, their positivity around kind of that parenting and positivity around the child's behavior, and it's just great to see that there is this community out there for for people that that may need it. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:07]: It definitely warms your heart when you can see that and be able to be have that renewed sense of humanity that sometimes gets lost along the way. And sometimes we get lost in our own lives that it takes a child in the pure way that they see the world to be able to make us take a step back and say, Oh, yeah, you're right. I lost that along the way. And I got a good reminder today. Damien Moore [00:19:38]: Exactly. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:39]: So as you look at what you're doing right now, what you're putting out into the world, what you're trying to create, as you think about the future, where do you want this to go? Damien Moore [00:19:48]: For now, if I just touch a few individuals' lives, that would mean the world to me. You know, I think from from a personal standpoint, I'd like to have a stronger voice in that community. And, I mean, I think the ultimate goal one day, I would love to become a a motivational speaker. As I said, I'm an extrovert. I love being around people. I love, you know, trying to share my positivity and energy. I I kind of absorb other people's energy, and I would like to, you know, hopefully one day turn that into me being out there and being a strong voice and just helping people on more of a larger scale than just, you know, kind of a small platform for now. So, yeah, that's essentially where I'd like to go one day. Damien Moore [00:20:22]: Yeah. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:23]: I love it. It. Now we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5, where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Are you ready? Damien Moore [00:20:31]: Sure. Yeah. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:32]: In one word, what is fatherhood? Damien Moore [00:20:34]: Beautiful. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:34]: Now I know your daughter's only 4 and a half, but I'm gonna still ask this question. When was the time that you finally felt that you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Damien Moore [00:20:42]: I mean, even yesterday's moment was very touching. I guess when I see her sheer generosity and empathy and compassionate to other people. I've been a strong believer in actually raising my daughter around animals because of what that actually teaches children from a very young age. It teaches them responsibility, teaches them compassionate, empathy. Fortunately, it also teaches them about about death because we've had a couple of dogs die since she's been born and kind of explains to her what death is. But I think just seeing this beautiful girl through her life learnings and just seeing it kind of come out into the world to other people is a joy to see. So I think I take that as a success every day. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:21:19]: Now if I was to ask your daughter, how would she describe you as a dad? Damien Moore [00:21:22]: Probably say I'm quite silly. I like to do a lot of silly dancing with her. Ever since she was young, I I personally quite like my EDM music, and I like to get her into my DJs, so she's always kind of danced along to me. But I think also she probably I'm the one that's the slightly firmer one when it comes to consequences in the house. I think, you know, we all experience tantrums. We all experience that kind of naughty behavior. From about 3a half, 4 years old, she's been kinda testing the waters in terms of retaliation and testing, like, how far she can test her parents. So I probably am the firmer one compared to my wife. Damien Moore [00:21:56]: I like to give more consequences if I if I have to. So I don't know if I should use that, but I hopefully I think it should lead with silliness and fun because, personally, I had a good upbringing, but I wasn't necessarily raised by a dad who was silly and very fine and engaging. I was raised by great parents, but I don't recall my childhood memories as being silly and, like, just goofing around a lot. So I've wanted to instill that a lot in my parenting as my own you know, being a dad to my daughter. I just want it to be, like, lots of silliness and embrace that. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:27]: And if you think about this in, let's say, 15 years, what do you want her to say then? Damien Moore [00:22:32]: I hope she says that I've prepared her as best as pop as possible for the world. You know, I want her obviously to look up to me as as an inspiring figure in her life. I want her to feel that I've given her the most I possibly can in life. I've given her safety. I've given her a good upbringing. So, yeah, that they would be the things I'll dream of in terms of her saying to me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:51]: Who inspires you to be a better dad? Damien Moore [00:22:53]: I have to say my mom. Because just knowing some of the upbringings that my family members have been through, I've always kind of just really pushed myself to be a better person. And I think she's always been there as my person that I go to whenever I reach my lowest moments. I always call her. She's my, you know, she's kind of carried me through many, many struggling moments in life, and she will still ahead in the future. And she's just my go to person for that. And she's definitely been my inspiration in life and inspired me to be a better dad, for sure. Damien Moore [00:23:23]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice today, things for people to think about, things to ponder, for people to consider for their own mental health and being able to do what they have to do. As you think about any father, no matter what their situation, what's one piece of advice that you'd want to give to every dad? Damien Moore [00:23:42]: For me, personally, I've always liked to put things into perspective. I know we have to recognize our individual life and the stresses we deal with and not to ignore them. But at the same time, put things into perspective and just say to yourself, things could be so much worse. There's so much happening out there in the world where there are errands going through a lot harder things than you may be yourself. And I think it's important just to take a moment sometimes and just pause in that moment and say, do you know what? I'm blessed to have what I have right now. Like, I'm so thankful and share that gratitude and love to the people around you. And just know that it it can be so much tougher on other people in life. And I think just recognizing that and trying to instill that into your daily life a little bit, it's something I've always tried to live by just growing up. And I definitely share that kind of as my one kind of piece of advice to people. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:24:33]: Well, Damian, I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for sharing your own journey today, for sharing what you have gone through thus far, for sharing the resource that you're putting together. If people wanna find out more about you, where should they go? Damien Moore [00:24:46]: Yeah. So the the Dads Daily Digest website is is dadsdailydigest.co. And there's, yeah, there's a way you can reach out to me there. And there's also a TikTok channel if you wanna engage through TikTok. And also, I mean, I have a LinkedIn as well. So you can type my name in Damien Moore Evans, and you'll find me on LinkedIn as well. So happy to people if they choose to. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:04]: Well, Damien, thank you for being here today, and I wish you all the best. Damien Moore [00:25:07]: Thank you so much, Christopher. I appreciate it. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:09]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the Fatherhood Insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, and the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step roadmaps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly, dads like you. So check it out atfatheringtogether.org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week all geared to helping you raise strong and power daughters and be the best dad that you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:26:07]: We're all in the same boat And it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time. We give the lessons. We make the meals. We buy them presents and bring your AK. Because those kids are growing fast. The time goes by just like a dynamite blast. Calling astronauts and firemen, carpenters, and musclemen, get out and be the world to them. You're the best dad you can be. You're the best dad you can be.
Jeremy is joined by his wife April and their friends Jess and Brittany to react to a couple of recent Youtube videos about family and daughters in particular. First they tackle the question, how do we raise daughters differently from sons, particularly from the Family Teams perspective? Then they dive into the trad wife movement and ask what sort of contingency plans women should have in case the men in her life all let her down. This is a highly nuanced and important conversation to have from a Christian perspective to compare it to the modern, anti-God cultural story we're being told. On this episode, we talk about: 0:00 Intro 0:41 Topics 2:03 Reaction Clip 1: Marriage and Childbirth Culture in China 10:49 How do we raise daughters differently? 19:02 The biggest story wins 25:46 Should women create contingency plans in case every man in her life fails her? 27:55 Reaction Clip 2: Trad wife movement and contingency plans 35:02 Why Christian wives aren't thinking about contingency plans 40:32 Fathers as contingency plans when daughters are in need 52:06 "We roll deep." Follow Family Teams: Facebook: https://facebook.com/famteams Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/familyteams Website: https://www.familyteams.com Resources Mentioned: Is Traditional Marriage Doomed for Millennials and Gen Z? The evolution of phony female empowerment trends --- Hi, welcome to the Family Teams podcast! Our goal here is to help your family become a multigenerational team on mission by providing you with Biblically rooted concepts, tools and rhythms! Your hosts are Jeremy Pryor and Jefferson Bethke. Make sure to subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or YouTube so you don't miss out on future episodes!
The Dad Edge Podcast (formerly The Good Dad Project Podcast)
Marc Von Musser is the CEO of Soar and Roar Inc., and the Founder of a human optimization program called “111 Days to Greatness”, awakening the greatness in others and helping people become their greatest self and live their dream life. He is also a highly sought after Sales and Coaching Expert who has helped thousands of companies large and small, grow their profits by over 100%, 500% and even 1000%. Marc Von Musser shares his transformation from a man who was ready for boys to a devoted girl dad who embraced the challenge of raising strong, confident daughters. He recounts the lessons he learned in teaching his girls everything from tracking animals to excelling in cross-country running, proving that girl energy and boy energy each have their unique strengths. Marc's story takes us through his own childhood, marked by a mix of dysfunction and adventure, as he grew up with a father who was a child movie star turned developer and a mother who was Miss Norway. Despite the challenges of an alcoholic household, Mark found solace and success in martial arts, where he excelled beyond his expectations. The conversation also touches on broader societal issues, as Marc discusses the emasculation of men in media and the importance of authentic masculinity. He emphasizes the need for men to awaken to their true potential and to resist the programming that has led to a decline in male confidence and purpose. www.thedadedge.com/466 www.soarandroar.com
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