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Quaranteam – Book 1: Part 12 The girls continue their pitches to Andy. Based on a post by CorruptingPower, in 25 parts. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels. Nicolette smiled, shaking her head a bit. "I split from Josh the week after the party, because, well, it's not important, beyond the fact that he was a fucking asshole and I was sick of dealing with it. I haven't seen him in years now, and it's actually better that way. If he's dead, good, good riddance, fuck him, he deserved it. As for her partner, well, Bill wasn't a bad guy, although I never really talked much to him, or should I say I wasn't much permitted to talk to him, because he was from the old school of domination, with the leather whip and the iron fist, and he didn't like submissives giving him any back talk. Whitney was mostly happy with him, although she'd admitted to me a couple of times that she could've done without Bill's sadistic streak of inflicting pain on her. Pain wasn't really her thing. She didn't mind it from time to time, but it wasn't something she got off on. Bill did. But Bill died from the virus in April, leaving Whitney sort of lost and directionless." "I'm certainly not into inflicting pain on people, Nicolette, but I don't know that even on my best or worst days I could be fairly described as a dom." Nicolette giggled and waggled a finger in his direction. "You might have the other girls fooled, Master, but not me, and frankly, I don't think Ash buys it either. When I was pitching this to her yesterday, I pointed out to her that sexuality is, well, it's sort of like a menu at a Cheesecake Factory “ there are so many options that you are bound to find things you like just every once in a while, instead of every day. And you are a good and kind man, but I've also seen that sometimes you just want to take something, to claim something. There is a beast in you raging to get out, and I've tried to make sure I'm around to fill that need for you. We all heard it when you were having your first go at Taylor, and even Niko told me afterwards she thought you were holding back a little, like you were worried we might judge you for it, but your household loves you and trusts you, Master." The maid pushed the button and the image changed again, showing a head on almost portfolio picture of Whitney, her wrists bound together in rope, a collar around her neck, still wearing a bra, her hair pulled back into a ponytail, a very lustful look in her icy blue eyes drilling straight into the camera. "She took this photo just for you, Master. Nobody other than the three of us has seen it. Not only does she want to join the staff, she wants you to collar her. Hell, she said if you wanted to, she would even get tattooed or branded for you." "Branded?" Andy gasped suddenly. "I would never!" "Oh, I told her that, and she said that just made you sound even more dreamy, but wanted you to have that option on the table. She doesn't want to be one of your wives, because she says that would put her on equal level with you. She wants to belong to you. She's always going to be submissive, but do you have any idea how hard it's going to be for a single submissive woman to find a sexual partner right now, much less one who isn't a complete asshole? The biggest problem with the BDSM scene, in my eyes anyway, is that too many people don't respect boundaries, that they aren't respectful of one another. Whitney's never going to feel bad about not getting to sleep in your bed, but if you tell her to one night, she will, gladly, as long as it doesn't become a habit. When it comes to the house, she will be the kind of control freak you need running your digital life, but all that desperate need for control, that's why she likes to be completely out of control when it comes to her sexuality. Wearing a collar from you isn't a mark of shame; it's a thing of pride and beauty for her. And all of the women you have in this house, Master, they're all such wonderful and warm women, friendly and inviting, and even though we've told them time and time and time again that we're merely the staff, they're still treating us as friends, because we are their friends, even if we still work for you." Andy had been listening to all of this very intently, because the expression on Nicolette's face wasn't one of concern, but one of excitement, of enthusiasm, of pride. "Why'd she take a picture just for me?" "Because after Bill died half a year ago, she was aimless, and I got, well, to be blunt, I got very worried about her. I couldn't go and check up on her because of the quarantine, but we FaceTimed every day. We still do. And I've told her all about this house, about you, Master, and all your amazing partners, and about a month ago, Whitney started saying something I've been hearing a lot from her lately. 'I wish I had what you have.' She was waking up from her fugue state over the loss of Bill, and she wanted something again, for the first time in months. She wasn't just thinking about what her next meal was, or how to solve some routing problem at work. She had a genuine desire to introduce something, someone into her life again. You. This. All of this," the maid said, gesturing around her. "You two sound very close," Ash said. "I don't know that you made it clear to me just how close when you were presenting to me for practice." Nicolette nodded. "She's, well, she's probably my best friend, the person I can be myself with the most, and I'm worried about her. You have to understand, she's like an old watch that's been wound up too tightly. When I say she's a control freak, I might be understating the case, but before now she's always had that release valve of having Bill to take over for at least a few hours every week, where she wasn't allowed to have any control, and through that, all that pressure got released. You can give that to her again, Master." "Do you really think I'm a good match for her sexually?" Andy said. "I'd hate to bring her here and disappoint her." The French girl's face spread into a mischievous grin. "Like I said, Master, Whitney's going to be like me, not an everyday food, but definitely a delicious treat that you simply must indulge in now and then. And I'm a very good judge of character, so I want you to try and look me in the eyes and tell me that the idea of having a woman who literally will not lift a finger until you tell her to do so doesn't turn you on at least a little bit, to have such total control over a woman that she is waiting with baited breath for you to give her a command. I'll bet everything I own that you can't." Andy smirked and blushed a little bit. "I'm not sure there's many men who could say that. I certainly wouldn't want that if she didn't want that but,” Nicolette nodded vigorously. "But she does, she absolutely, positively, definitively does want that. From you. I think the biggest challenge you'd have with her is the feelings you'd have when you put the collar on her, because I can tell you, her one and only demand is that you collar her when she arrives, and that she only ever takes the collar off to bathe. I know you're going to have reservations about it, which is why I'm spending so much time reassuring you that this is ultimately what she wants. It's an odd thing for a man who describes himself as a feminist to do, collaring a woman, but realize, you are giving her what she wants “ the ability to not have to think for a bit." Ash grinned a little bit. "You forgot to tell him the final thing." Nicolette held her fingers to her mouth, trying to stifle a giggle once more, as she nodded. She then picked up the remote and clicked the button again, as the image advanced one more time. At first, Andy thought the image was the same, but then he saw it, resting atop of her bound wrists. A first edition of "The Demon Dies At Midnight," a small press book he'd done for himself before he'd started writing the Druid Gunslinger books, in many ways the precursor to the whole series. It was a short novel, more of a novella really, that Andy had written just to sort of test the idea of writing long form fiction, and while it shared some similarities with the Druid Gunslinger books, it was a stand alone tale about a freelance demon hunter who traveled the world, trying to find the demon that had laid a curse on him when he was a child. Andy had used a print on demand service for the book, and only 2000 copies had been sold before he had found a publisher for all his work, starting with the Druid Gunslinger books. His publisher had scooped up the rights to his first book along with the Druid Gunslinger books. Once they did, Andy had stopped the print on demand version of it, so those 2000 were all that was ever going to be printed with that cover, a touch more erotic than the publisher was comfortable with. He'd looked and the first editions were worth several hundred dollars on the secondary market now, even though copies of the second edition, the one done by his current publisher with its less racy cover, were available for ten bucks. "She's a fan of yours, Master, going back to the beginning. You can't see it, but that copy of your book is signed, by you, when you were doing signings in Santa Cruz." "She would've been living in Chicago when that book came out!" Andy laughed. "So you can't me she's been a fan of mine since then." "Oh, she bought it on the secondary market a couple of years ago, when she first started getting into your writing, long before I met you. She said it was worth it to have the original rather than a second edition. She reads loads and loads of sci fi and fantasy, but says you're an excellent writer, one of her favorites. When she found out you were my Master, she begged and pleaded with me to find some way for her to be able to join me. I told her I would keep my eye open for an opportunity, but that I didn't want to be disrespectful and ask you on my own." Andy clicked his tongue, shaking his head. "I told you that you could come to me with anything, Nicolette." "I know you did, Master, and thank you for that, but you have been wall to wall busy since you first arrived here a month or so ago, and there just never seemed to be an opportune moment until Hannah started talking to us about you being able to request people, which brings us all up to speed, here and now," she said, gesturing to the image behind her. "I don't just think she's an obvious yes, Master, I think she's the most obvious yes. And if you need a little help stoking the fires of the shades of a controlling bastard that hide inside that warm soul, you know I'm always willing to lend a hand or whatever you might need. Whitney and I have played together sexually before, and if she comes here, I have no doubt that she and I will be play partners again. You have a lot of amazing women on offer for you here, but this one has to be a slam dunk. Thanks for giving me the chance to introduce you to my best friend, and I can't wait to hear you tell me to invite her over." The maid pressed the button and the image of Whitney disappeared to be replaced by "Next: Niko" in white letters on a black background as she stood up and made her way to the door. Andy leaned over to Aisling. "Give me 5 10 minutes, okay?" Aisling grinned and nodded. "You're the boss, boss." He stood up quickly and made his way out into the hallway, closing the door behind him, as he moved quickly to catch up to Nicolette, just as she was about to reach the stairwell leading upstairs. "One sec, Nicolette," Andy said, "I have one more question for you." Nicolette smiled as she turned back to him, standing at the edge of the stairs. "Of course, Master, what can I " As soon as he was within reach of her, he grabbed her by the waist and spun her around, bending her forward until her back was nearly perpendicular with the wall, lifting her dress up and tugging her panties aside with one hand, unbuttoning his jeans with another. Before it even dawned on her what was happening, he lined the head of his cock up against her snatch and just shoved forward with one rough, penetrating thrust, sinking hilt deep as a groan was ripped from her throat, deep and sultry. "Was this what you wanted?" "Fuck yes, Master!" she whined, as he drew back and then thrust forward again with a harsh shove, forcing her cunt to swallow up his cock. Her hands reached before her, trying to brace herself, as he reached forward and grabbed her by the throat, making her stand upright, even while scooting forward as best she can, until her tits were mashed against the wall, her face tilted towards the ceiling, when he drew back and then punched forward again. "Is it wrong of me that your filthy little fuckmaid has been fingering her sloppy cunt thinking of her Master slamfucking her best friend?" Andy couldn't help but laugh about that, as he drew back again. "Is that the only thing you've been thinking about?" "Fuck!" she whimpered as he railed her again, lifting one of her legs to allow him to penetrate a little bit deeper. "You know that it isn't, Master. Your bratty little slut thinks about you all the time, imagining her Master doing so many dirty things to her." He shifted his hips a little bit, making sure he was good and slick, before he pulled her away from the wall and then moved her over to a table, forcing her forward, yanking her panties down to her ankles before tugging it off of her entirely. He grabbed the lacy underthing in his hand and then bent her over the table, pushing her knees to make her get a little bit lower, and before it could even register what he was doing, the head of his thick cock pressed against the rosebud of her asshole and just sunk through, greasing its way deep inside of her ass, lubed up with the drippy juices from her cunt. "Fuck oh fuck oh fuck you're fucking thick, Master, that's such a big fucking cock you've shoved up my tight young ass!" Nicolette whimpered, her voice squealing upward in pitch until it was a shrill shriek, more like a siren than a person. "I've been dreaming about being your stuffed little buttslut, Master, so just fucking hammer me already!" Andy had a weird notion, and he decided to follow through on it, as he reached around and stuffed Nicolette's panties into her mouth, and he could swear she clamped down even more tightly in excitement. Her hands were free, so if she wanted to, she could've pulled them out any moment. And yet, she didn't. Instead, the moans burbling from her throat grew more intense, her hips trying to push her ass back into his firm thrusts as much as she could. She was throwing her body back at him any which way she was able, but for the most part, she was simply getting railed, keeping as much of his cock buried inside of her ass for as much of the time as she could. After a minute or so, she started spasming and clamping down on his cock, and he couldn't resist, so he unloaded a heavy load of cum into her asshole, sweat dripping from his forehead against the back of her neck, until he softened enough to slip out of that tight pucker. When he leaned back, he tucked his cock away and pulled up his boxers and jeans, zipping them up, a wry smile on his lips as Nicolette turned around, an incredibly satisfied look upon her face. She pulled her panties from her mouth and that wild grin was the happiest he'd ever seen on Nicolette's face before. "Now that is how you fucking use me, Master," she purred with as much sensuality as she could. "And you have fucking earned keeping these for a bit." She leaned forward and tucked her panties into the front pocket of his jeans. "And don't worry, I'll fish them out of the laundry later." She tipped her head up and kissed him for a moment. "Thanks so much for that! Jesus! Au revoir!" Andy took his hand and wiped sweat from his forehead and grinned a bit to himself as he watched her head up the stairs. "Well then. Job done." When Andy headed back into the room, he found Aisling waiting with a shit eating smirk on her face. "Got your release valve off with the hired help?" she teased. Andy blushed a little bit, realizing that the door wasn't all that thick, and that he had taken Nicolette not all that far from the room, but then he decided he had nothing to be embarrassed about. "Look, she made it abundantly clear what she wanted from me, and so I damn well gave it to her," he said with a laugh, as he moved to sit down in his chair. "It had been over a week for her anyway, so she was due. You can tell Niko we're ready for her now." Niko was practically coming through the door when he said it. "She already knows. She was enjoying listening in on you giving Nicolette exactly what's she's been waiting for for a week now," she giggled. "And she, uh, I, I'm here now. How's presentations been so far?" Andy was about to answer out of reflex when he felt Aisling's hand on his arm, and heard her say, "No dirty snooker from you, missy. He's not tellin' you nuffin'." "He was about to, though," she winked at the redhead. Niko was in her uniform, something Andy had rarely seen her in, even though she wore it nearly every day. When she headed to the base, she always left before he got up, and she changed out of the uniform before she came home, so it was a little surprising to see her decked out in the formal wear. Her hair was up and pinned back, and she even had the chest candy on her uniform, as she'd been known to call it. "Going to present someone from the base?" Andy asked, suspecting it was the reason for the uniform. "You got it," she said, picking up the remote as she pushed a button as the image changed to a rather stern looking blonde woman in her mid forties with a hawkish nose. "I want to introduce you to Captain Tracy Bells, sir. She's a, y'know, we could do the whole thing, Ash, or we could just,” "It's yer call, Niko," the Irish redhead said to her, a conspiratorial grin on her face. Niko nodded, then motioned for Ash to come and join her, which she did, throwing Andy completely off guard. "Look, I'm not pitching Captain Bells to you, Andy," Niko said with a smile. "Because frankly, she's got a giant stick up her ass. I don't really have anyone to pitch you at all, to be frank. That's not why I'm here. It's a pretense." Andy tilted his head to one side. "Then why are you taking up a pitch slot?" "Well, it seemed like the best time that Ash and I could get you all to ourselves. For this," she said, pushing the button, as the image changed. In its place was a selfie that clearly Niko had taken just a day or two earlier, of her and Aisling. They each seemed to be holding something in their free hands, and just as it was dawning on Andy what they were, both girls spoke at the same time. "We're Pregnant!" Andy pointed a finger at Aisling, who nodded, then over at Niko, who nodded as well, then kept jumping his fingertip back and forth between the two of them as they both kept nodding, wild smiles on their faces. "What, both of you?" "Yep!" Niko said, giggling, as both her and Aisling started walking around the table, one on each side of it, closing in on him like a planned maneuver, leaning against the table, pinning him in his spot. "Most of your girls have synched up their time clocks, love," Aisling said, "So it was bound to happen to a couple of us at the same time. Niko and I are just glad it's us first." "Well, we sort of made sure that we were," Niko giggled. "I thought you were both on birth control still!" he said, although the smile on his face made it clear he wasn't upset. "Did everyone stop taking their birth control?" Aisling shook her head. "So far, I think we're the only ones who have." "We both stopped taking them a few months ago," Niko said. "When I started seeing and hearing the horror stories about the hospitals while I was working on base, I knew that this was going to happen, this or something like it, so I told Aisling and we just stopped taking our birth control pills, and well, here we are!" "I ran into town for the tests Saturday morning, and wouldn't you know it, two buns in two ovens, all from one chef!" Aisling said, as Andy wrapped his arms around both of them, hugging them intensely tight. "And you're both happy? I know you both did this intentionally, but sometimes people get second thoughts. I'm not! Getting second thoughts that is. I mean, I'm happy, I promise you I'm happy, but I want to be sure you're both happy." "We're ecstastic, hon," Niko said to him, nuzzling her face against his cheek. "We weren't sure when the best time to tell you would be, but when the whole pitching process started, we wanted to be sure you understood that maybe getting a nanny into the house wasn't such a wild idea." "Who knows?" Andy asked. "Just us and you," Aisling said. "We haven't told anyone yet." Andy kissed Niko, then Aisling, then Niko again, then Aisling again. "It's damn nice to have to some good news for once. So, should we go get lunch and tell the rest of the household?" "Sounds good to me," Andy said. "Niko?" "Absolutely," Niko said. As they headed towards the door, she leaned over and pushed the button on the remote, changing the slide so it was a black screen again with the words "Next: Piper." The last of the girls' pitches to Andy. Chapter 26 Lunch had been great fun. Once Aisling and Niko had told Andy, they'd wanted to tell everyone as soon as possible, so the moment they'd sat down for lunch, they'd told everyone straight out, which had led into a small celebration, and sort of let Andy slip into the background with his thoughts. Sure, the girls all congratulated him, but they were all much more interested in how Niko and Ash were feeling about everything, so Andy could do a little bit of his own research. When he had half a minute, he asked Katie for both more about Lexi, and what she thought of Jade Dillon. He also did a little bit of talking with Sarah about Maya Steele, since clearly they ran in similar circles. When he had a moment, he also pinged Hannah to see if she'd heard anything about Olivia Shoemaker, Asha's "influencer" friend. Finally, he asked Jenny about Katie's ex, Dr. Morgan Fitch. By the end of lunch, he almost wished he'd brought his yellow notepad with him. It was a lot of names, a lot of opinions and thoughts to keep from getting scrambled around in his brain. But his own opinions were starting to bake in, to settle and coalesce into something more solid. His mind was so wrapped up in his thoughts, he almost overlooked how lunch was, as it always was, amazing. He made sure to tell Jenny just how excellent it was, and she said he could thank her by making sure to bring Alexis into the family. He didn't answer her, but his smile probably gave him away. He didn't mind. When they were walking back towards the meeting room, Aisling slipped her arm around his waist, leaned in and kissed his cheek. "You're happy Niko and I are expectin', right, love?" She had a smile on her face, so she was simply reinforcing what she already knew. "Sometimes you can bit understated 'bout these kinds of things." Andy chuckled a little, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "You know that I am, Ash. I'm sorry if I seemed a little distant at lunch. This is just a lot of information to take in all at once, lots of people to consider, lots of decisions to make. Shit, people's lives and livelihoods hang in the balance of my stupid judgment. The decisions I'm going to make tomorrow have real, genuine consequences, things I gotta live with for the rest of my life, and I don't want to let anyone down. Turning anyone down feels like  " "Stop," Ash said, holding him from walking any further. "I told you up front that nobody was going to hold anything against you, and we're all going to honor that. You didn't have to let anyone have a say, and you're letting everyone have a say. That's all anyone has the right to ask of you." She sighed, then laughed for a second. "Jaysis, if it was me, I'd have thrown the towel in and just taken nobody, but you're not doing that, despite the fact that nobody would've blamed you if you did. Instead, you set down what your reasonable capabilities are, and everyone agreed to them. So stop getting in your own damn way and just get on with it already." He had to laugh with her at that point, nodding in agreement. "Okay, okay, I get it. No more moping about this, and no more overthinking it. Just listen to the pitches, make my decisions and move forward with our lives. I'll hold you to nobody being mad, though." "Everybody knows what's coming down the pipeline, Andy," Ash said. "It'll be alright. I promise you, it'll all be alright. Now let's get these last four underway. There's still a few surprises left to spring on you, and it's always fun to watch your expression when you're caught off guard." "What kind of crazy surprises do you have lined up for me?" he said, as Piper strode through the door confidently, dressed in her Team USA gear, some sort of warm up suit. He was certain she wasn't wearing the full Olympian gear underneath it, but the very presence of the outfit seemed designed to send a message. "You should know she doesn't have anything planned for you, Andy," Piper said, smirking at him. "This is all us." "How are you feeling, Piper? Head starting to clear up? Starting to feel more like yourself again?" Andy asked. "A lot better, yeah. The first few days, it was like, I dunno, like I was walking through fog, like every inch of my body was coated in maple syrup," the brunette volleyball player said, looking around the room a bit before looking back at Andy. "I was living in quicksand, but over the last couple of days, all of that's been lifting and I've felt mostly like myself again. I've been trying to get back on my work out regimen, so that's helped some. But I think the further I get away from that state, the better off I'll be." She looked better, there was no denying. Her eyes didn't have the dark, heavy bags underneath them that they had when they first met. She'd also put a little bit of weight back on, but Andy suspected that was because she had been massively dehydrated when they'd first met. He was glad to see her coming back into being her full self. "A couple more weeks and I'll be right as rain again. But that's not why I'm here today." "Yeah, well, it doesn't hurt for me to ask about you first." "Yeah yeah," Piper said, as she picked up the remote, pressing the button as a Nordic looking blonde appeared on the screen. "I don't know how much you follow the Olympics, but if you do, you might recognize my friend Brooke Maloney here. She's being hyped as the next big thing for the woman's swim team. She's going to enter a number of various swim competitions,  breast stroke, freestyle, relay,  but obviously there aren't any games this year, and she's going out of her mind swimming laps in the compound's pool." The blonde, much like Piper, looked fit, although she looked much shorter in comparison, with broader shoulders and a wide smile on her face, sitting at a table full of athletes. Piper pushed the button again and the screen advanced to a new image, one of Piper and Brooke sitting on a blanket at some outdoor concert. "What do you mean 'compound?'" Andy asked. "A lot of the soon to be Olympians were at the US Training Camp, putting in a hard six months before the Olympics," Piper said. "Me and the rest of the volleyball team were going to be diverted there when the lockdown had been going for a few months, but it was deemed 'too risky' for any of us to be moved. Well, up until our dear Mister Covington decided to scoop me up and tried to make me into his own personal plaything. Thanks again for rescuing me from that, by the by." "I'm just glad you're not mad it's me you're bound to." "We've been over this, Andy," she sighed, a polite smile on her face. "I'm happy it was someone as nice as you. Let's move things forward. Now, one of the dirty little secrets you may not have heard about the Olympics is that after an athlete competes in their particular event, they go back to the Olympic village and they let off all that pent up steam that's been building in them for years. I haven't had a chance to experience myself personally, but our trainers and coaches have been telling us about it for as long as we've been old enough to hear the stories. I don't need that pressure valve any more because, well, I have you. But my friend Brooke, well, she doesn't have that." She pushed the button and the image advanced to another picture of Brooke, this time in Daisy Duke cutoff jean shorts, a white tied up shirt and a wide brimmed stetson hat, somewhere at a country bar, a Corona in hand with a lime. Her blonde hair was done up in short pigtails, which looked odd on her by Andy's reckoning. "Brooke and I have been friends for a couple of years now, and believe me, the Olympics is literally all she thinks about," Piper said. "She wants to win gold medals so much it, it's eating her up inside. Now with the 2020 games being pushed back until at least 2021, she's going out of her mind, like a predator able to see its prey under glass but not being allowed to hunt it." Piper pushed the button and the picture changed to an image of Brooke leaning against a Shelby Cobra, dressed in overalls, covered in grease, a wrench in her hand. "Her only other real passion is classic cars. She's something of a gearhead, and any time she's not training, she's working on cars. She's done more than a couple frame off restorations and more than a handful of heavy mods. She's had a couple of boyfriends over the years, but they never last all that long." "So what's she like in the sack, Pipes?" Ash asked her. "She's about as vanilla as they come," Piper answered. "She likes things slow and steady, smooth and soft. But she'll be a good lover, and a good friend." "Complications you anticipate?" Andy asked. "You're from pretty different worlds, but I've often been told that opposites attract, so maybe that won't be as big an issue as I think it might be," she shrugged. "You're pretty rock'n'roll, and she's a country girl at heart. You're a big city guy and she's a small town girl. She's at church every Sunday and I'm pretty sure you're an aethist. So maybe that's all too much to scale, but then again maybe it isn't. I'm sure whatever you decide, it'll be the right decision." Piper pushed the button and the screen advanced again, back to a black screen, with the words "Next: Sarah" in a cartoonish white lettering. "Any reason you didn't suggest any of the other girls from your volleyball team, just out of curiosity?" Andy asked. "I would've figured they would've been some of your best friends." The brunette smirked, flashing him a little wink. "Oh they are, but there's no way in hell I'm sharing my man with the likes of them. Let'em find their own hunk and they can keep their sticky fingers off of mine." With that, Piper headed out of the room, leaving the door open behind her, striding confidently down the hallway. "So, just to warn you about the next one, Andy, we do know in advance that you have met her a couple of times, but in the pictures we've seen, you always looked friendly, so we're going off that," Aisling said to him, as she texted Sarah to head to the conference room. "If we're wrong in those assumptions, ye can tell us and we'll let the matter drop then and there." "Oh yeah?" Andy said, suddenly wondering what familiar face was going to grace the screen in moments. "Where do I know her from?" The Irish redhead waggled a finger in his direction. "Just be patient, love. She'll up and in front o' ya in just a minute or two." Andy rolled his eyes with a grin. "Then what's the harm in telling me early?" "The harm is Sarah will have my tits in a wringer if I spill the goss before she's here." "Good lord, you girls and your secrets," he muttered in amusement. The statuesque redhead arrived moments later, and she immediately came over to hug Aisling, a giggle slipping from Sarah's mouth. "Congrats again, Ash," Sarah said to her. "I didn't want to say it in front of the others, but I am totally fucking jealous of you right now, you wouldn't even fucking believe me how jealous I am. Today is obviously the day I stop taking my birth control, because, damn, my clock is ticking, girlfriend." Ash shook her head with a mischievous grin. "You don't want to wait until you're a little more settled in first, Sarah? Or until you're married?" Sarah pulled back from the hug, looking over at Andy, licking her lips with a wild smile. "Shit, if I thought I could get him to do it, I'd beg him to fuck me until I was knocked up right here on this table, right here and now. But I've only got ten minutes, so maybe I should just get to the presentation." Andy gestured to the remote with a smile. "Maybe." "One thing first, though." Sarah had come into the meeting in a dress skirt and a dark red silk blouse, but she turned around, did something, then turned back, bringing a glistening finger to Andy's lips before the actress slipped it into his mouth, and he could taste her cunt on it. "Just so you know how much the idea of you breeding me turns me on." She winked at him as she pulled her fingertip from his lips and walked back to the other side of the table. "On with the show, Sares," Aisling poked. "Yeah, totes, Ash, I'm getting' there." Sarah picked up the remote and clicked the button, as the screen behind her flickered to life. "Oh look! It's you! And you're with one of my other total favorite writers, Larissa Cotton!" Andy immediately recognized the shot. It was taken about five years ago, at DragonCon. Andy hadn't wanted to go, but he'd been nominated for a Hugo, an award he'd ended up winning, for "Behind The Darkest Sky," the most successful of the Druid Gunslinger novels, partially because it was the most risky of the books. When Andy had written it, he'd almost thought it might be the end of the series if it didn't work, if the audience didn't trust him to stick around long enough to see the story continue in the next one. He'd left the Gunslinger in a hell of a mess at the end of the book, and while he was over half way through writing the next one when "Behind The Darkest Sky" had come out, he'd still been in a very nervous place about going to a convention. At the Hugo awards for the night, he'd found himself sat with a handful of authors he hadn't met before that night, including Larissa Cotton, a Hispanic woman from Portland who'd written an amazing book called "Ions At Dawn," a technothriller about a woman who finds herself grappling with an archaeological find that threatens to rewrite the basic underpinnings of science. Andy had read all the nominees and found her book fascinating, although maybe a bit too heady for the average reader. Larissa was nothing like any writer he'd ever met before. She was brash, confident, boisterous and outspoken, the loudest presence in any room, and yet, never in a harsh way. She was a plus sized woman, thick but not in an unappealing way. The silver hoop in her nose had been a little off putting, and Andy had found the overwhelming number of tattoos more than a little distracting, almost perhaps no more than the goth Lolita look meets skater punk she'd been rocking at the party. They'd gotten along reasonably well, although Larissa had gotten rip roaringly drunk by the end of the night. Andy and a couple of others had needed to help her back to her hotel room, since she was nearing blackout stages by the end of the night. Andy and Larissa had reminded occasionally in contact since then, but they certainly weren't what Andy would describe as close. They'd met up a couple of times in the years since, but generally it had just been if they'd been in the same town, and then only within a group of people. "Larissa lives up in Portland," Andy said. "Sure, but that can change," Sarah said. "I mean, Emily and I both lived in LA until we moved here. Asha's lived most of her life in London and Piper spent most of her life in Florida. People move, Andy. That can't be an excuse." "Well, no," Andy laughed, "but she was also engaged last I heard." "Wait, what?" Sarah asked. "I talked to her like three months ago, and she didn't mention it, and I didn't see any engagement ring." He shrugged. "Maybe I misheard, or maybe they called it off. It was a couple of years ago, when a bunch of us were getting drunk after our ComicCon panels. She said she'd just sold the film adaptation rights to 'Ions At Dawn' to somebody and we all went out to celebrate." Aisling nodded. "She sold the rights to Sarah, as a matter of fact." The taller redhead pushed the button on the remote and the screen advanced to an image of Sarah and Larissa at a conference table shaking hands. "My production company, Awkward & Dorky Films, to be more specific. We agreed to let her give us a first draft if she agreed to go through the notes and revisions process without too many complaints." "Heh," Andy smirked. "And 'Ris agreed to that? Talk about being prickly to editors. She damn near took my head off when she had me read a first draft of her third book, 'Castle of Yesterdays,' and I gave her notes on it." "It totally couldn't have been as bad as you're making it out to be, Andy," Sarah teased. "Don't be such a baby. Suck it up." "I believe she told me that I could roll up my notes and shove them into my cock until I was crapping them out," he said. "Fuck," Sarah muttered. "You must've been really hard in those notes." "Not really?" He shrugged a little. "I mean, I offered some opinions and I told her that a couple of the chapters went on too long with nothing happening, and that the climax felt overly weak but that it was a great first draft. I mean, I liked the book a lot. But that's what you do with first drafts,  show them to someone, figure out what works and what doesn't, then make a real book out of it." "I liked 'Castle of Yesterdays,' though, Andy!" Sarah whined. "Sure!" he said, waggling a finger at her. "You just read the final version, which went through about six revisions. And, for what it's worth, she ended up using most of my notes. I mean, I didn't hold it against her that she didn't like getting notes. Every author can be a little bit of a prima donna sometimes." "Well, as of July, I don't think she was married or engaged or whatever, and she's completely rad. Also, you two get along, because you've obviously gone out for dinner and drinks before, and she trusted you enough to let you read her first draft of a new book, so that seems good enough to me, don't you think?" "I mean, we weren't close friends, but we were, er, are friendly acquaintances. I don't know that either of us thought the other was their type, though. She seemed to be into people who were way more of the 80s skateboard punk ethos than me." "You saw her with a man at some point?" "Oh yeah," Andy said, "Well, no. I mean, not directly, but she showed me a picture of her and 'her man,' she called him. He was big, fit fellow. Broad shoulders, six pack. About as far from me as any man can possibly get. He looked like he could've bench pressed me for hours without breaking a sweat, and she, well, she looked happy." Sarah shrugged a little bit. "Whoever he was, Andy, he completely didn't last, because when she and I were meeting to discuss our notes for the screenplay, she was sniping about how she hadn't had a proper lay in months. So big and hunky didn't work for her, so maybe you could. I know she thinks you're cute. I told her I had a crush on you and she said 'Well, who could blame you?' so I think she does too." "How well do you know her, Sarah?" The taller redhead shrugged. "Not all that well, but she's been nice to me, and she's someone you know, so maybe that could be something that would work for you." "Do you have any idea whether or not we'd be sexually compatible?" Sarah shrugged with a smile. "It's never come up, so I don't have any idea." "Possible challenges?" "Two writers in the same room might always want to be editing one another?" she giggled. "I genuinely don't know, Andy. But I thought it was a good idea so I wanted to suggest it." "Fair enough then." "One last thing before I go," Sarah said, pushing the button to advance the screen to an image that read "next: Sheridan" on it in a frilly cursive font. "I was telling you at lunch that I think bringing Maya Steele into the family is a great idea, so I wanted to stress that while I haven't changed my mind on that, I did forget to tell you not to ever get into a drinking contest with her. Your head will hurt and your liver will be punching you for days." "And yet, you still think I should bring her in?" Sarah nodded emphatically. "Maya's a bad ass, and you need someone as direct as her in your life. I mean, Neeks handles most of that, but really, Maya's got her beat hands down." "Are you trying to convince me not to bring her in? Someone more direct than Niko?" "It'll be fine, Andy," Sarah said, flipping her hair with one hand. "I already know you're going to pick her, so trust me when I tell you that is the correct decision to make." "And if that isn't the decision I'm making?" "Then you're being a fucking idiot and you'd better come to your senses before your final decision, because no man should be allowed to be that fucking stupid. Obvs. But I know you're totally not and you're really just fucking with me, and that's cool," she said as she walked around the table before leaning down and kissing him firmly, pressing her lips against his for a long moment. "Have fun with the rest of the pitches!" As Sarah walked out of the room, Aisling shook her head while sending the message to Sheridan for her to make her way up to the pitch room. "It can be very hard to remember she's been nominated for an Oscar when she acts like that," the smaller redhead said. "But I guess it's part of her 'girl next door' charm. Anyway, what did you think? You're not mad about Sarah pitching Larissa?" "Why would I be mad?" he laughed. "I just don't know that it'd work. But it's something I'll definitely consider when I'm doing my deliberations, especially since Sarah seems to think Larissa might be into me. I never got that vibe, but  " "But it's well established you barely know a woman's into you even when she's sitting in your lap and whispering into your ear that she wants you to fuck her brains out." Andy gave her a disapproving smirk. "I'm not that bad." "You're not far from it, anyway." Sheridan came strolling into the room, wearing what she had at lunch, far less dressed up than most of the girls, wearing jean shorts over a leotard or a swimsuit, her frizzy blonde hair mostly tucked back, damp but not soaked. Andy half wondered if she'd been swimming in the pool while she'd been waiting. Sheridan had been known to enjoy swimming, even though the weather was dipping into the cooler side. Since her job as a performer was on hold until the pandemic was under control, she'd done her best to find ways to occupy her time. "Heya stud," she said with a wink as she wandered over to sit down in the chair. "I'm not gonna ask you if you've made decisions yet, but I am gonna ask how you're feeling about the process so far. It's hella cool that you're giving us input into that, and it's a big deal, so thanks for that. Anyway, I think you're gonna find my friend a wild ride." "Let's get to it then," Andy said. Sheridan picked up the remote and pushed the button as the screen popped to life, a image of Sheridan sitting with a young woman in her late 20s or early 30s, with jet black hair and skin the color of desert sand. She was a little more on the plump side, with a mischievous smile. They were sitting at a wood table on the patio of some local bar. "This is my friend Tala Jordan," the blonde said. "Her parents immigrated here from Iran in 1970. We met in high school and became besties. She's the one who talked me into quitting smoking. We were roommates in college down at Santa Cruz and we've been roomies on and off again since we both graduated in 2012." "Why do I feel like I've seen her somewhere before?" Andy said, the woman's face looking vaguely familiar in a way he simply couldn't place. "You go to a lot of concerts, Andy?" "Some." "Well, then she's probably been singing with an opening band you've seen at a concert." Sheridan pushed the button and the image advanced, showing Tala playing an electronic keyboard on a stand, and singing into a microphone. He recognized the stage as The Independent, a small but influential club in San Francisco that also tended to get some big name acts. "Boom Goes The Dynamite, Castle Idea, The Grendelles, Lowball Skyscrapers, Girls Gone Danger, hell, probably at least half a dozen more that I can't remember. Every time I talk to her, it seems like she's got some new band she's playing with." "What does she do when she's not playing in a band?" Aisling asked. Andy was certain she probably already knew the answer to the question and was simply asking for his benefit. "She's a carpenter," Sheridan said, pushing a button to advance to a slide of Tala working on a desk. "More specifically, she's a cabinetmaker, most of the time, anyway. She and a couple of her friends opened their own custom furniture house about five years ago, and people really like their stuff, because that's kept her afloat while living in the Bay, although to be fair, she's also gotten a very specific kind of clientele as of late." "What's that?" Andy asked. Sheridan pushed the button again, and the new image showed Tala sitting on top of a desk with dozens of shelves, a hutch atop it that had a number of closed doors on it. "She's become a puzzle maker. Custom puzzle boxes, puzzle desks, that kind of thing. It's a weird little niche, but it pays incredibly well, and she's made stuff for people like Kris Angel, Neil Patrick Harris and Elon Musk. Those projects usually take a month or two's worth of work, but they pay for an entire year or two's worth of mortgage, so she's okay with it." "Fascinating. What's she like as a person?" "She's wicked smart and very funny." She pushed the button and the image advanced again, showing the two of them standing on the Golden Gate bridge, their backs to the Bay. It must have been extremely windy on the day the picture was taken, because both women were doing their best to keep their hair from flying all over the place. Both girls were clearly laughing hysterically. "Some people think she can come across as a bit mean, but they just don't recognize she's only busting their balls a bit. She always told me that the Persian sense of humor can go over the heads of people not smart enough to keep up with her, and that she doesn't mind. She's a lot like Niko, and considering how much you and she get along, I think you'll dig Tala loads." Andy nodded. "Do you think she and I would be sexually compatible? What's she want out of a man?" Sheridan grinned from ear to ear and Andy immediately wondered what he'd said to trigger such a reaction. "If you had asked me two weeks ago, I would've given you an entirely different answer than the one I can give you today, dude. So when I told her about the whole imprinting process, and all about the accident we had with me getting primed early, I expected to see Tala be hella concerned about me, but instead, she got this freaky look on her face, and I realized about half way through my story that she was jilling off, while I told her about it. It turned her on so much she just couldn't help it," the blonde said, licking her lips with wolfish delight. "I'd never known before, but she's always had this pheromone fetish. Like, she gets turned on by the idea of being so turned on that she doesn't have control of her self, that she's turned into some carnal unstoppable beast who is going to fuck even if she has to move hell to get it." Andy swallowed a mouthful of air awkwardly. "When I told her about your first encounter with Piper, I swear to god, she fucking came just hearing about it. She wasn't even touching herself at that point, 'cause she was holding the phone with both hands. I asked her about it, and she said she was kinda embarrassed to talk about it, but admitted that it'd always been a fetish of hers. I found out all of this yesterday when I called to ask her if she'd be interested in me putting her forward for a chance to join you." "And I take it that the tales of the imprinting process only enhanced her interest?" "Totes. Obvs she wants to be here, but she also wants you to edge her all the time." "What do you mean edge her?" "She asked what happens when you try and stretch out the amount of time a girl needs to get her dose, and I told her your story about you and Lauren, and she wants to constantly be going towards that state. That turns her on like you wouldn't imagine. So seems to me like you get multiple ticks in the win column by bringing her here." "Possible challenges?" "Well, being quarantined in New Eden's gonna be rough on her, because she's big into spending time with her parents. She moved into their house when the pandemic started, and I know when people come into New Eden, they can't leave until the pandemic's over, so you'll need to make sure she understands that, but I'm betting the idea of getting to live out her number one sexual fantasy, like, all the fucking time might be enough to convince her that her folks will be okay on their own." "How close are you two, Sheridan?" "She's, like, one of my best friends, maybe my best friend, actually. I think you'd like her a lot. I know we haven't spent, like, loads of time together, but she really wants this, and you've got me, and you seem to like me well enough, so maybe you'd like her too, y'know?" Andy nodded with a smile. "Okay then. Thanks for talking to me about her, and I'll be letting everyone know tomorrow what my decisions are." "Yep, I got the spiel on the rules from Ash before we got started, so I know how it works," she said, pressing the button to advance the screen once more, bold white letters reading "next: Taylor" on the black background. "Just remember, while we all gotta live with'em, you're the one who's gonna have to fuck'em every couple of weeks, so don't take anyone you don't wanna dip your wick into on the regular, y'hear?" With that, Sheridan headed out of the room, leaving Andy and Aisling alone in the room again. "I didn't even know there was a fetish for that kind of thing." "You live near San Francisco, love," Aisling teased. "You more than anyone should know there's a fetish for every kind of thing. And nobody's judging. If it's not your thing, no problem. If it turns you on thinking about it, no problem. To thine own self be true, like Polonius said." "You know it's meant to be bad advice when he says it in Hamlet, right?" Andy replied. "Don't be such a geezer about it." "I'm a writer, Ash. Being a geezer about the English language is right there in the job description." Taylor knocked on the door, and had to be told twice to come in. She was actually dressed in clothing now, Lauren obviously having made an exception for the day, as the girl was still in her time of punishment. Andy wasn't sure that Lauren would make her go the whole month, but as of yet, the Aussie had shown no sign of suddenly doling out leniency. Taylor had on a pair of gym shorts and a white muscle t shirt that did very little to mask her impressive bust, but her hair was drawn back into a modest ponytail, high on her head, done up in a scrunchy. "So I'm the last one, huh?" she said, as she came into the room, looking at the chair then looking at Andy expectantly. "Sit, sit," Andy said. "If she's letting you get dressed to pitch, I'm sure she's fine with you sitting in a chair while you go through the whole process. And if she wasn't, I'm certain she would have said something." "Yeah, I guess you're right," Taylor said, finally moving to sit down in the chair. "Uh, hi! I did want to be sure and say thank you for letting us all do this, sir. I know you've been a little overwhelmed by all the female attention you've been getting, but it's very kind of you to allow us to suggest our friends to you, to make this home a little more like home." "Just as long as none of you get mad if I don't choose the people you pitch," Andy said. Taylor's bright blue eyes widened and she shook her head. "Oh,

It's a simple plan this week: We're just looking at what was on television in late May of 1981. Including: A bizarre Happy Days musical, a horrifying Waltons episode, Mork in a bubble, skydiving Hulk, something called "Women Who Rate a 10," Bo Duke with amnesia, Daisy Duke on Enos, Batman on Fantasy Island, a Muppet on a medical drama, a dead parrot at Mel's Diner, and way too many variety shows (from Bob Hope, Steve Allen, Robert Klein, the Gatlin Brothers, and the Mandrell Sisters). It all sounds wonderful, doesn't it? You should probably cancel Netflix and invest in a time machine. The Mayor of Chickentown on The Doctor's Beard podcast! And our regular links... The Flopcast website! The ESO Network! The Flopcast on Facebook! The Flopcast on Instagram! The Flopcast on Bluesky! The Flopcast on Mastadon! Please rate and review The Flopcast on Apple Podcasts! Email: info@flopcast.net Our music is by The Sponge Awareness Foundation! This week's promo: Have Coffee, Will Travel!    

Nancy Mace confronts a man in public after a heated town hall question, later releasing a video promising to "make you famous" if harassed. The PBD crew debates if her quick trigger is justified or damaging, and dives into threats, trauma, and the backlash she's facing over gender policies.

TRENDING - How the thief stole Kristi Noem's Gucci bag, Elizabeth Warren struggles to answer questions about Joe Biden, Nancy Mace vs. Daisy Dukes guy, Leonardo DiCaprio pays tribute to Pope Francis, Joe Exotic marries inmate jailed on immigration charges.

Patrick Bet-David, Tom Ellsworth, Vincent Oshana, and Adam Sosnick dive into JP Morgan's explosive take on the U.S.-China trade war showdown, Nancy Mace's fiery clash with a guy wearing daisy dukes, JD Vance's jaw-dropping meeting with Modi in India, and Gavin Newsom squirming under scorching heat for LA's chaotic 2028 Olympics prep.------

With the passing of Pope Francis comes a litany of American and global tributes - Marjorie Taylor Greene's awful tweet notwithstanding. Among them are the thoughts from DignityUSA's executive director Marianne Duddy-Burke, who joined me to opine on his somewhat-progressive papal legacy and provide some insights into where the Catholic Church will go, ideologically, next. ------I've mentioned him as the kind of quality candidate Georgia Democrats could succeed with atop their 2026 ticket, and lo and behold, Senator Jason Esteves made it official: he's running. ------Last week, I spoke with Dustin Baxter at Kuck Baxter Immigration Law about their 'mass action' lawsuit in defense of international students whose visas were suddenly (and surprisingly) revoked. Good news Friday in that a judge issued a temporary restraining order keeping their status intact, pending further hearings later this week. ------Pete Hegseth was a disastrous choice for defense secretary, and that's not just me saying so; former Trump administration Pentagon insiders are, too. The 'DUI hire' fired three top aides, likely in an effort to snuff out any hint of the leaking that he again - again - used the Signal app to share sensitive military secrets in a group chat ... this time with family members in the mix. Was Pete's mom in the loop? NPR is reporting, by the way, that this may have been the final blow and that the White House is now looking to replace him. ------Okay, so even Joe Rogan thinks "disappearing" people to El Salvaodran prisons and skirting due process makes Trump and ICE "monsters." I mean, he still spews (in caricature 'MAGA moron' voice, no less) ignorant and bigoted spew about Latin American immigrants, but still ... oh and this gives me the occasional opportunity to remind everyone that Donald Trump actually allowed in more criminal migrants in his first term than Joe Biden did in his. ------Lastly, by now you've likely heard about Nancy Mace verbally accosting a man for having the audacity - as one of her constituents - to ask when she'll host another town hall. So much to unpack there: she presumed the man was gay and thus should have been happy with her that she voted in support of gay marriage (because gay men are single issue voters, I guess?), is unaware what "Daisy Duke" shorts are or that men's fashion has evolved from the dreaded "cargo shorts" era to five-inch inseams, insinuated the guy was in her face (from 5-6 feet away?) and dropped a litany of f-bombs insisting he get out of her face (as he was already walking away). Need I remind the "lady" about the code of conduct of her alma mater, The Citadel? Something about "honor, duty, and respect, with a focus on ethical behavior and personal responsibility."I mean, at least she was spotted in the skincare aisle. That worn look on her face screams "moisturize and sunscreen, lady!"

Its Monday everyone's favorite Two Flogs caller show. Buster rips in with a new segment “Facts you didn't think you needed to know”. Gibo spends the whole episode looking at images of Daisy Duke. The boys laugh their heads off at some cracking calls!Moose ends the episode getting fired after a double “Moose F@cked Up' and Gus ...just does Gus things. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As most of you know, our Patreon audience has the INSIDE access to the KF Show. The year 2025 will be an important one for Patreon specifically and if you'd consider jumping up to the $5 level it would sure help. The $10 level will remain and we now have a brand new $20 level as well! All members who join at that level will receive a sticker swag pack in the mail, you'll be IMMEDIATELY entered in the monthly prize grab, and you'll receive a phone call from one (or all) of us to chat up whatever you want for 30 minutes! Thank you SO MUCH to those of you who have joined in for the extra content that is only for Patreon supporters. To get in on the action and support the show with a minor financial contribution just click the link below to sign up. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW ======================================== Presented with Holley - Back for 2025!  Phase 3 of Kibbe and Friends is officially here, and Holley is back for more fun, foolishness, and flying orange Chargers! Once again we're proud to be associated with the historic name that has made cars fast for years and years, and their innovations continue forward (as always)! Make sure that you visit Holley.com to place your speed parts orders - and THANK THEM for continuing on as the Title Sponsor of the KF Show!  ======================================== Dukes Review: Actor Jonathan Frakes plays "Jamie Lee Hogg"….but of course he is better known to millions of loyal Trekkies and Commander William Riker of the Starship Enterprise (1701-D). That's right. This is the Star Trek to Dukes of Hazzard crossover that will have Ryan Brutt and I on the same side of the fight….until this episode is over, of course. Plot: Boss Hogg's umpteenth previously unnamed nephew shows up in Hazzard to make some ill gotten gains…only to accidentally fall in love with Daisy Duke. That's all well and good except Boss Hogg, Uncle Jessie, and all of the evil business partners are against it…and to make things worse, the evil guys want Daisy killed before she learns too much! But then the Hogg wants to marry the Duke and the evil partners think it's so sweet. This leads to every body panel on Rosco's patrol car being surgically removed in a hilarious fashion, a massive car chase, a few recycled car jumps, and a remarkable amount of improv by Tom and John. Oh, and they don't get married and live happily ever after, either. And by next weeks show this will all be long forgotten! Show Rating: 1701 Corndogs! Legit Show Info: Season 4 - Episode 1: “Mrs Daisy Hogg” Written by Si Rose Directed by John Florea Original Airdate: 10/9/1981  ======================================== Welcome to the High Performance Expo! We are pleased to announce that the all new High Performance Expo has joined us to share their inaugural event, the exclusive business and enthusiast show of the North Carolina Motorsports Association (NCMA), will be held from June 3-5, 2025, at the Charlotte Convention Center, followed by area-wide enthusiast activities. The event will bring together all segments of the racing, aftermarket, restoration, and performance community for the first time in the heart of the auto racing industry. We'll be bringing you more details until the show starts! Visit https://thehpx.com for details.   ======================================== National Parts Depot Presents: Bernie on the News! https://www.npdlink.com. The post K&F Show #324: #KibbeLee Cameo on Tim Allen's Shifting Gears?; Dukes Review – S4E1 “Mrs. Daisy Hogg” first appeared on The Muscle Car Place.

Fans think that Hailey Bieber is now starting stuff just like her husband, Jennifer Garner's new man is not excited about Ben being back and Jelly Roll rocking Daisy Dukes. Comedian Michael Yo is on to talk about his upcoming show at The Parkway. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Fans think that Hailey Bieber is now starting stuff just like her husband, Jennifer Garner's new man is not excited about Ben being back and Jelly Roll rocking Daisy Dukes. Comedian Michael Yo is on to talk about his upcoming show at The Parkway. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

MUSIC Sammy Hagar has posted a video on Instagram of him with Paul Rodgers hanging out in Southern California. He captioned it with, "Paul Rodgers had as much influence on my singing as any singer of my time... Congratulations on [Bad Company making] the Rock Hall ballot ... without a doubt a winner. Free [the band Rodgers was in before Bad Company] also one of my favorite bands." I feel like I haven't heard much about Ne-Yo lately.  Maybe that's because he's busy with his FOUR GIRLFRIENDS. Ne-Yo took to Instagram to introduce the four women he's in a polyamorous relationship with . . . whom he calls his "Pyramid".   Jelly Roll rocks Daisy Dukes in a new commercial for Zevia. The Zevia collab makes sense.  Jelly has been outspoken about his weight loss journey, and making healthier choices for his body.  Zevia soda has no sugar, and uses stevia leaf extract for its sweetener.  And the ad is self-aware   Doechii is Billboard's 2025 Woman of the Year.   An official Iron Maiden book celebrating the band's 50th anniversary, Iron Maiden: Infinite Dreams - The Official Visual History, will be published this fall by Thames & Hudson.   TV Wendy Williams was hospitalized on Monday after dropping a distress note reading, “Help! Wendy!!”   Max is sending Conan O'Brien on a few more trips. The streamer has ordered a third season of O'Brien's travelogue series Conan O'Brien Must Go.   Eric Stonestreet has signed on to the Showtime series, Dexter: Resurrection.    Amazon has canceled the "Cruel Intentions" series after one season.   The first guests on "Everybody's Live with John Mulaney" will include Michael Keaton, Joan Baez, Fred Armisen, and Cypress Hill.  The show debuts tomorrow night on Netflix.   MISC After several hours of outages on Monday, Elon Musk explained on X that the platform experienced a "massive cyberattack." He wrote, “There was (still is) a massive cyberattack against

MUSICSammy Hagar has posted a video on Instagram of him with Paul Rodgers hangingout in Southern California. He captioned it with, "Paul Rodgers had asmuch influence on my singing as any singer of my time... Congratulations on [BadCompany making] the Rock Hall ballot ... without a doubt a winner. Free [theband Rodgers was in before Bad Company] also one of my favorite bands." I feel like I haven't heard much about Ne-Yo lately.  Maybe that's because he's busy withhis FOUR GIRLFRIENDS. Ne-Yo took to Instagram to introduce the four women he's in apolyamorous relationship with . . . whom he calls his "Pyramid".  Jelly Roll rocks Daisy Dukes in a new commercial forZevia. The Zevia collab makes sense.  Jelly has been outspoken about hisweight loss journey, and making healthier choices for his body.  Zeviasoda has no sugar, and uses stevia leaf extract for itssweetener.  And the ad is self-aware  Doechii is Billboard's 2025 Woman of the Year.  An official IronMaiden book celebrating the band's 50th anniversary, Iron Maiden:Infinite Dreams - The Official Visual History, will be published this fallby Thames & Hudson. TVWendy Williams was hospitalized on Monday after droppinga distress note reading, “Help! Wendy!!”  Max is sendingConan O'Brien on a few more trips. The streamer has ordered a third season ofO'Brien's travelogue series Conan O'Brien Must Go.  EricStonestreet has signed on to the Showtime series, Dexter:Resurrection.  Amazon hascanceled the "Cruel Intentions" series after oneseason.  The first guests on "Everybody'sLive with John Mulaney" will include Michael Keaton, JoanBaez, Fred Armisen, and Cypress Hill.  The show debutstomorrow night on Netflix. MISCAfter several hours ofoutages on Monday, Elon Musk explained on X that the platformexperienced a "massive cyberattack." He wrote, “There was (still is)a massive cyberattack against

Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about 5-year anniversary since COVID, sleep awareness week, National Dream Day, town in Florida called Taintsville, emailer proposes new segment: how hot am I?, tornado hit a TV station while live on the air, man robbed after winning at the casino, old woman crashed and car went up in flames, police chase over 90mph ended with pit maneuver, dentist loses license after removing tooth with pliers, gondola at ski mountain fell to the ground, Giants still looking for QB, early World Series odds, Mo Vaughn opens up about HGH, track competitor hit on head with baton by opponent, high school golfer saves drowning opponent, Hanta virus, Wendy Williams drops note from window asking for help, White Lotus features Jason Isaac’s character flashing family, actress from Harry Potter joins OnlyFans, Ne-Yo in relationship with 4 women, Rick Springfield has brain damage from stage fall 25 years ago, Vana White reveals she only works 34 days a year, Jelly Roll in Daisy Dukes, chubby people started brush fire while making s’mores, Sean Weiner Sr stole a car and caused accident, naked man dancing along highway, man says his dog shot him, woman saved for 10 years to get nose job, record for hairiest face, a lack of sex can double the chances of men dying, man found frozen snake in an ice cream bar, woman passes note to another woman in bathroom asking for help, woman got into standoff with cops after beating her man, 5th degree black belt defends store from being robbed, woman got scammed on Tinder, people lie to their dentist, oranges on pizza, trend where men are trimming their eyelashes, 108-year-old woman is oldest barber in world, man arrested for robbing 6 gas station convenience stores, guy pulled prank on co-worker by locking her in hot steam room, woman freaked out over bee in drive-thru, man crashed car and fled scene, toughest negotiators are kids, KFC bringing back potato wedges, and more!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

Courtney's magic tricks, Jelly Roll wearing Daisy Duke shorts, and gender reveal ideas, all from this morning's show!

National Pig day. Entertainment from 2015. March, Deadliest avalanche in US history, Lindbergh kidnapping, Hoover Dam completed, Ohio (1803) & Nebraska (1867) became states. Todays birthdays - Harry Belafonte, Robert Conrad, Roger Daltrey, Dirk Benedict, Alan Thicke, Ron Howard, Catherine Bach, Tim Daly, Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Lupita Nyong'o, Kesha, Justin Bieber. Jack Wech died.Intro - Good did good - Dianna Corcoran   https://www.diannacorcoran.com/The pig song - Pudding TV Kind of a drag - The BuckinghamsI'm a lonesome fugitive - Merle HaggardBirthday - The BeatlesBirthdays - In da club - 50 Cent     http://50cent.com/Banana boat song - Harry BelafonteWild Wild West TV themeMy generation - The WhoAndy Griffith TV themeSaved by the bell TV themeTic Tok - KeshaSoryy - Justin BieberExit - Cigerettes and bad decisions - Timothy Craig  https://www.timothycraig.com/ countryundergroundradio.comcooolmedia.com

We might not be back to feeling normal yet after our big Young Bucks interview, but the episode format? It's back to normal, baybee. Did we process that much of what happened at World's End? Maybe not, but we're here to discuss it anyway, along with what trends we want wrestlers to consider "In" for 2025, and what we'd like them to usher "Out." We talk Continental Classic, we talk Kenny's big return, we talk Cope, and oh yeah, what everyone's been waiting for, we talk Jeff Jarrett! All this and more on this week's Tunnel Talk! (00:00) Young Bucks interview debrief (9:39) World's End PPV overview(12:47) Continental Classic World's End matches(13:25) Ospreay vs. Fletcher(16:24) Ricochet vs. Okada, Swerve(18:09) Ricochet and Swerve, Undisputed Kingdom, Jay White(22:32) Okada vs. Ospreay & Kenny's return(27:46) Mox vs. OC vs. Hangman vs. Jay White & Cope return/RatedFTR(46:15) OC vs. Hangman in singles(59:58) Mercedes Mone and Kris Statlander(1:05:42) Acclaimed breakup(1:11:46) MJF and Adam Cole(1:18:44) Jeff JarrettSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/social-suplex-podcast-network/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We might not be back to feeling normal yet after our big Young Bucks interview, but the episode format? It's back to normal, baybee. Did we process that much of what happened at World's End? Maybe not, but we're here to discuss it anyway, along with what trends we want wrestlers to consider "In" for 2025, and what we'd like them to usher "Out." We talk Continental Classic, we talk Kenny's big return, we talk Cope, and oh yeah, what everyone's been waiting for, we talk Jeff Jarrett! All this and more on this week's Tunnel Talk! (00:00) Young Bucks interview debrief (9:39) World's End PPV overview (12:47) Continental Classic World's End matches (13:25) Ospreay vs. Fletcher (16:24) Ricochet vs. Okada, Swerve (18:09) Ricochet and Swerve, Undisputed Kingdom, Jay White (22:32) Okada vs. Ospreay & Kenny's return (27:46) Mox vs. OC vs. Hangman vs. Jay White & Cope return/RatedFTR (46:15) OC vs. Hangman in singles (59:58) Mercedes Mone and Kris Statlander (1:05:42) Acclaimed breakup (1:11:46) MJF and Adam Cole (1:18:44) Jeff Jarrett

The Hoes and Bitches Need A Champion.Based on a post by FinalStand, in 13 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at Explicit Novels. ‘Once you go Black, you don't go back; unless you are an Amerindian, Arabic, Asian, Black, Indian, Latina, or White girl, or guy who has tried Black, then found sexual fulfillment with a non-Black person and created a blissful relationship with them'Introduction:Right off the bat, be warned that I'm using the 'N' words, nigger, niggah, my niggah, plus homie, thug, coon, buck, spook, spade and whatever other crude racial slurs that come to mind. This story plays to both Black and White stereotypes.Lastly, this story is rather flippant with the entire concept of sexual assault. Those who have red my previous tales know this is not my attitude at all. For the sake of this genre I had to grapple with the concept of forcing a woman and 'making them love that cock'Prelude:My tale begins as the Winter Man Saga 1300 years ago, about the year 700 AD. One small clan of my Swedish ancestors lost a brutal feud with their neighbors. Their farms were burned, animals slaughtered and their women and children taken as slaves. Only three young brother-warriors survived, wounded but unconquered. The victors chased them high into the mountains when a terrible winter storm struck.The three brothers were trudging across a glacier between the mountain peaks in Whiteout conditions. The lead brother stepped into a crevasse and slid to the bottom of the glacier. Not giving up on their last kinsman, the other two slid down into the darkness after him. At the roots of that glacier they found an ice cavern formed by snow that fell 100,000 years ago.They melted the ice for water with their body heat and in doing so, unleashed a demoness (virus) that no man had ever known and survived. The three men grew very sick, but their fierce desire for vengeance kept them from succumbing. When they emerged from their icy tomb, they discovered that several of their pursuers had frozen to death in the blizzard and the rest had returned to their stolen homes and purloined lands, thinking the three brothers were dead.In the dark of the long northern night, they snuck upon the Great Hall of their enemies. When one of the brothers saw his 'former' wife doing a slave's work, he revealed himself to her. She rejoiced at the return of her love; physically, then brought the three table scraps to survive on. In the process, they learned that their sisters were also alive and the sexual playthings of their male nemeses.Due to the depth of winter, stealing back their womenfolk wasn't possible. They'd all freeze to death if they didn't starve first. To repay their enemy's wickedness, one of the brother's snapped and raped one of the chief's daughters. He was possessed with an unearthly desire and held her in a stable for hours. Only when he was utterly spent did he fall asleep.She ran to her father and returned with many warriors. So the first of the brothers was taken. He was tortured and abused. For three long nights he suffered at the hands of his captors yet refused to admit any of his other brothers were still alive. After that third night, the chief's daughter sneaked past the sleeping guards of the chained man, and raped him.For the next five nights, while her father, brothers and husband slept, she raped and raped and raped that brother. On the fifth night, a sister-in-law caught her at it. The daughter pled for the other to spare her; that the man's sexual prowess had ensnared her. She even challenged her kinswoman to sample the 'fruit' before turning her in. Five women later, the brother cracked and told the women how to find his brothers.The night after the Spring Equinox Celebrations, the women of their enemy rose up and slaughtered all their adult menfolk at the behest of the three brothers, on the conditions that their youngest sons be spared and that the men continue to share their favors with all the womenfolk (who were not their kin).The Sammi ClanThe isolated region of the land of the Swedes kept my ancestors out of contact with the wider world for some time. Many generations later, a son of that clan came to lead a band of (female) Finns. His Swedish name is forgotten. The Finns called him Sami (the Exalted One, no shit). He and this band took to fur trading along the Eastern tributaries of the Volga.In time, this group became identified with the Varangian. The Sons of Sami intermarried with the Slavs, becoming Slavicized and the Sons of Sami became Samsonovs. They followed the Rus expansion into the eastern tributaries of the Volga reaching Nizhny Novgorod in the 10th century.Then came the Mongol Conquest, the Tartar Yoke, Rus reunification and the Russian drive across Siberia. The Samsonovs remained tightly clannish and uncomfortable in urban settings. That wanderlust led them across the Bering Straits into Alaska where their genetic abnormality, the gift of that ancient demoness (virus), slumbered in isolation and monogamy.After a thousand years, the tales of mass orgies with strange women and protective female war bands faded into obscurity. Then my Mom, the brilliant, driven eccentric came along. Once she became enraptured with her own Samsonov lover, she had to know the secret of Samsonov men's sexual prowess.With her burning intellect and educational background, she eventually figured it out. She was also amoral enough to keep the knowledge to herself and vengeful enough to plan to use our curse as a weapon.My Living Family·         Father, Nikolay 'Nik' Samsonov;·         Mother, Gayle Fonteneau Samsonov;·         The Triplets, Alexander 'Alex', Mikhail and Vladimir 'Vlad'; that's me.Sitting at the dinner table, I protested; ‘Mom, You actually expect me to believe my Father, Brothers and I have the genetic capability to addict every woman we have sex with to our schlongs? That's nuts!'Mom retorted; ‘As opposed to thinking the color, length and girth of a phallus makes any woman lose all sense of loyalty, morality and decorum so she can become a man's sex sleeve, whore, bitch, property? Yes, I do.'The lives of my family took an unexpected detour in the spring of this year. My great-aunt Matilda (Mattie) died and willed her estate to Mom. I had never met the woman while she was alive yet in death she would have a profound effect on all our lives. Mom's family was a mess; a crowded dingy with a madhouse of odd characters.Lionel was my eldest maternal uncle. He was a Big, Bulging Brain working as a Chief Technical Advisor for NASA; a solitary crusader for all Mankind. What was he a technical advisor for? If anything left terra firma for more than fifteen seconds, he knew every detail about it. That included volcanic eruptions too. When we were younger, he invited us to various volcanoes (both above and beneath the waves). Great guy.Cassius, my second uncle, was serving time in Indonesia for piracy. Mom said he was meaner than every saltwater crocodile that ever lived. The two times I'd met him, he'd been a lean, happy laconic kind of guy with a love for military history. Mom said he was a charismatic rebel who was possessed by an obsession to defy authority in all its forms.Dido was child number three; my Mom's older sister, married to an Evangelical Televangelist in Nebraska under an assumed name, Paula Richmond. She also had a MD in Psychiatry and a Master's in Public Communications (under her real name), which she kept secret from the fundamentalist congregation. The few times we met; she was the perfect mother. Secretly, we three sons wished she'd been our mother instead of our real mother. Mom said Aunt Dido was a master manipulator and wielded a cruel whip;Then there was Mom's twin, Uncle Theo, who never lived in one place, traveled all around the globe and had every law enforcement agency in the civilized world looking for him. We always receiving presents from him during all the normal holidays; like Michaelmas, Holy Week, the start of Lent, Martinmas (his favorite) and our birthdays; which arrived at random, unrelated times of the year and never from the same location.He was the only one we'd never met, but the one Mom loved the most. Dad suspected he was a narco-trafficker while Mom insisted he was too paranoid to be considered reliable for that line of work. Mom told us he'd spent his formative years killing people for Uncle Sam until one day he simply walked away from Fort Bragg and became an independent contractor.The Defense Department sent some fine, brave men from Joint Special Operation Command, to talk to Mom every few months. They made sure not to trip over the CIA and Homeland Security types who occasionally staked out our house. We boys guessed they came around every time Uncle Theo assassinated people. Mom taught us how to appreciate them in an elaborate ritual she called 'April Fool's, which became an 'any day of the year' activity.My Mom's father (I never met the guy) was a leader of a cult in Nevada. He went down, guns blazing during a DEA raid. Apparently his interests included both harems and marijuana production.Mom's mom? She left my Mother outside a dive bar in San Diego and was never seen again. She had doctorates in Biology and Physics as well as the reputation for being a certifiable Space Cadet. Mom insisted her mom hadn't abandoned her, she'd simply forgotten where she left her youngest daughter who was 15 at the time.After five days, Mom decided to join an Alternative Rock band instead of looking for the lady yet again. Seven years later, she was declared legally dead; though all her offspring believed she was still alive; somewhere; doing something.Then you had Dad's family. We had some characters on that side of the family, just not like Mom's. For starters, Samsonovs were bred for law enforcement. We'd been arresting bad guys since the 1500's. We'd been doing that in Alaska since the time of the tsars. When the Alaskan Territory was sold to the United States; well, my ancestors simply started writing their reports in English instead of Russian.Over the centuries, we had bagged serial killers, smugglers, poachers, drug dealers, domestic abusers and thieves. Mostly they arrested drunks and wackos. My Great Grandfather Petrov was a law enforcement legend in Alaska. Alone, he ran down a pack of murderous robbers in the dead of winter before they made it to 'safety' in the Yukon Territory.In the spring, they found them frozen solid, him leading five men, he recorded in his journal he'd killed the other three while apprehending the gang, back in chains. That pretty much defined the nature of my Father's family, no too many stellar geniuses, but always relentless past all norms of endurance and reason. The moment females were allowed in law enforcement, the womenfolk joined the profession.My Aunt Iliana was in the Coast Guard, that made her the 'Black sheep' in this clan. Taking the law out to the high seas was about as wild as Dad's family got. Dad was pretty much the standard issue for my kin. Big, Dad was 6' 5' and 290 lbs., and about as imaginative as a glacier. Why Mom married Dad had long been a mystery to his sons.Don't get me wrong. I loved my Dad, but the man used a grand total of twenty different sentences his entire life. The fewer words he had to speak, the happier he was. He was a nice guy, never drinking too much and I'd never seen him lose his temper. He smiled, was unerringly polite and had always been helpful and playful with us kids from our earliest memories.Grandpa, my great-aunts and -uncles, my aunts, uncles and cousins by blood were the exact same way. I mean that quite literally. We all pretty much looked alike as well. Those who married, married eccentrics. In our regular family get-togethers that translated over to the blood kin in one room saying and doing nothing (we were already cluing into some sort of primitive telepathy) and being very happy that way, while the married relations were in another room packing on the lunacy.There was no middle ground; you were either a silent, brooding peak in the Samsonov mountain range, or the aurora borealis. That left me and my brothers, we were triplets, in a precarious position. We looked like smaller versions of our Dad (we were still growing) yet were totally at the mercy of our Mother most of our young lives. Recall what I said about eccentrics and lunatic behavior. Mom was the Queen of the Asylum.Mom quickly fell in love with 'things' and she loved doing those things with family. Since Dad worked long hours, family meant my brothers and me. We could make passable pottery by age seven. Krav Maga? Screw this 'driving to some dojo in Anchorage' crap. Mom signed us up for a two week course in Israel and online lessons for a year. Archery, check. Rewiring our house and refitting all the plumbing, check.The three of us were SCA squires at age 12. Pleading to Dad was pointless. He'd smile, mess up our hair and remind us these excursions made our Mother happy aka he wasn't going to help us have normal lives. We had some ex-Green Beret guys teach us outdoor survival skills in Wyoming. We could pull wool, make thread and knit a set of pants and sweaters.I and my brothers had to memorize 1200 medically useful plants before we could get our Christmas presents when we were 14. We free-climbed mountains, ran 10Kms, kayaked, were proficient seamen on a sailing ship and learned how to navigate by the Sun, Moon and stars. Around the age of 15, we figured out that Mom had a ton of money squirreled away. There was no way Dad, with his civil servant's salary, could afford all this crazy shit.By the age of 18 we had such a crazy patchwork set of skills, we weren't sure what we would end up doing with our lives; though tracking down Uncle Theo and living a life on the run was looking more attractive every month. What we didn't have were great social lives. We all had girlfriends at one time, or another, but they never lasted.Right before any of us were about to get serious with any girl in high school, my Mom dragged us off; to things like a five day course on Renaissance artwork in Milan; that's Italy. We had to learn to speak Italian in three days, plus during the flight over. Mom made it easy for us. We could only speak Italian the entire time. Doing that at school was 'fun'. Dad? He smiled and said nothing for three days.Welcome to the Fonteneau House, Kingston, ArkansasAnyway, Mom's Great-aunt Mattie kicked the bucket and left her vast fortune in northwestern Arkansas to my Mom. The old bird hated the rest of the nutjobs in the clan, but adored my Mom (and Theo). Upon receiving the news, my brothers and I began thinking the same thing: banjo lessons, redneck stunts and girls in Daisy Dukes. By 'fortune' we were thinking a ramshackle Ozark shack sitting on a mountain top.Nope. Great-aunt Mattie was loaded. In fact, Mom's whole family had tons of money. They'd made a killing, quite literally, during the White expansion westward using various despicable means. They'd even been cursed by an entire Indian Tribe for bilking them off their land. Mom's family blamed that malediction for their bizarre behavior.That Arkansas home was actually the summer residence for the Fonteneau clan from a hundred years ago. Along with the palatial residence came thousands upon thousands of acres spread over a quarter of the state (and some land in Texas, Missouri and Oklahoma too).Tara, or the Biltmore estate, it was not, but it certainly had pretensions. It was a wide and roomy, rambling Victorian structure. The house proper (there were two barns, a stable, storage sheds, two garages, one attached and the other stand-alone, semi-attached servant quarters and four outlying hunting lodges) abutted the Kingston town limits.The place was big enough to require Mom to employ six staff;Phineas Cobb the third, an angry, sullen old White guy and his carbon-copy son, Phineas IV, were our two Wardens. That meant they took care of the outlying property which included hunting down poachers, interlopers and moonshiners (the competition, no doubt) and seeing to the upkeep of the various lodges, roads, trails and bridges around the place. Phineas the third and Mom; well, he cried and hugged Mom when he saw her, so we didn't know what to think of him and his son.Bebe Marston worked the stables and the twelve horses therein. She was a college dropout, White and 21; a woman at one of life's crossroads. Great Aunt Mattie brought her on a few months before she passed on. Bebe was a bit shy and distant around the menfolk. Mom treated Bebe like her long lost daughter; they got along fine.Thomas Freeman was the groundskeeper. Thomas seemed nice enough, a polite and somewhat deferential older Black man. I liked him. Mom fired him the moment the lawyer finished reading Maggie's Will. She believed the man was a back-biter, liar and a thief.Kamika Perry was the cook. She was a largish, plump Black woman with a large family in town. She was a tyrant in the kitchen but friendly and out-going everywhere else. She knew Mom from before; before what, we didn't know. She was close to Mom's age and was the niece of the former cook. She and Mom were cordial yet a tad formal.Nefertiti Cooke was the upstairs maid. She was a whip-tin attractive Black woman in her late-20s and joined Thomas heading out the door. Mom discharged her due to Nefertiti's sour attitude and general unwillingness to adhere to a work schedule.Anita Turner was our downstairs maid and overall manager of the other servants. Like Kamika, she knew Mom from her previous stay at the house, though Anita was already part of the staff back then. They acted like old friends though they understood the mistress-servant dynamics of their relationship.Mom solved our labor shortage by bringing in Mexicans (Hondurans actually). The two families divided up the nine rooms in the detached servants' quarters with Bebe, since Anita and Kamika lived in town and the Cobb's had their own cottage somewhere on the property.Hector Martinez became our new groundskeeper. He had a wife, Maria. Mom enrolled her in some online college courses so she could get a teaching license. They were both pretty young.Consuela Castro was our new upstairs maid. She was a single mother with a son, Gustavo (10), and a daughter, Isabo (6); they went to the local elementary school in town. Both families were very nice to us and seemed happy with their current circumstance. Since this job was their first go at being domestic servants, Mom told us to be patient and respectful while they learned the ropes from Anita and Mr. Cobb (only Mom could call him Phineas without pissing him off).My brothers and I, our Father, the Martinez's and the Castro's couldn't have predicted the shit-storm Mom was creating between our house and the dominant Black populace of Kingston along the great racial divide. The Hondurans had spent half their lives learning to keep their heads low when faced with discrimination. We didn't, nor did we know that Mom was acting with deliberate malice of forethought at that time.To help appreciate our understanding of the situation, we triplets had known a grand total of four Black people well enough to call them by their Christian names our entire lives. One was a crazy, older guy who had been a sniper at some point in his military career. By crazy, I meant he'd go off on tangents in mid conversation, or just stopping entirely. We all liked the guy.He and Granddad Samsonov were real tight. They'd served together in Vietnam and we boys suspected something bad had happened to them both, something which scarred and bound them together closer than brothers. He and Alexander went hunting all the time back in Alaska. All I knew was Morris (Grandpa's comrade-in-arms) was treated like family.That meant if Morris got in trouble, fifteen to twenty Samsonov's would show up to bail him out. That's what family meant. The other two were a retired Air Force couple, Parker and Mariana Carrington plus their infant William, that had moved in next door (that's 40 yards away in Alaska) when I was fourteen. They were in their early thirties and wanted to start a family. The woman had been pregnant with her second child when we left.My Mom and another neighbor trundled her off to a clinic during her first birth. Dad had driven fifty miles in a blizzard to get her husband, so he could witness his firstborn come into the world. The man worked as a fishing boat mechanic and had gotten stuck at work when his wife went into early labor. It was the Alaskan way to look after one another.I never much thought about minorities. There were nearly as many Native Alaskans attending my schools as White folk. The Natives knew my family going back eight generations. I had a few cousins who were 'First Peoples'. Minority? Majority? We were Alaskans and that was that.Again, I didn't think much about there being a social and economic racial crevasse when I showed up in Kingston, Arkansas. I probably would have been totally blind-sided about it if Dad hadn't done his due diligence and went to the Kingston Police Station and Davis County Sheriff's Office to report his status as an Alaskan State Trooper and register his firearms.Since we didn't know what to look for, we missed the obvious signs of trouble. The Black police officer that Dad talked to was; impolite. He informed Dad there would be no 'courtesy' given despite Dad's professionalism, i.e. he wasn't permitted to carry any of his licensed firearms. The Sheriff's department was very different.We met the Sheriff and the man got Dad to be about as verbose as I'd ever seen him. The Sheriff verified Dad's story, gave him a 90 Day permit for his sidearm and told him to make no never mind over the Town cops' hostility. He certainly seemed pleased Dad had three big, strong, strapping boys and gave Dad an application to join his department.That night, Dad informed us all at the dining room table he was considering the Sheriff's job offer. Mom was secretly pleased (like her sister, she IS an evil mastermind and master manipulator). Anita, Bebe and Kamika were eating with us as well, Mom insisted all the help do so (the Hondurans weren't with us yet), and I detected a hint of worry in their posture. I would have thought 'us' staying in the house, thus their continued employment, would be seen as a good thing.Welcome To Kingston.That night, over some late night cocoa, Mom gave the family the regional 4-1-1. Kingston was 75% Black, 20% White and 5% other. The rest of Davis County was 95% White and 5% Black and other. In Kingston, the Blacks ruled the town. All elected officials and police officers were Black. The Sheriff's department had a few Black officers, but was mostly White.It would have been all White except a combined lawsuit by Southern Poverty Law Center and N Double A CP, forced the County to 'integrate'. I asked the logical question: why hadn't the town been forced to integrate too? Mom told me that wasn't how things worked in the Lower 48. Here, Blacks couldn't discriminate; they could only be discriminated against.The Federal government said so. I was sensing shades of Uncle Theo in Mom's blanket assessment of things. My brothers and I were wrong. Mom was right. We were entering White Man's Hell aka Big Black Cock Country. Of course, Mom wasn't sadistic, or masochistic. She had a tidbit of knowledge no one this side of British Columbia was aware of, a Secret Weapon.Dad applied for and got the job of Senior Deputy, which riled some of the other (read: Black) deputies, but Dad's extensive experience and easy-going manner eased his entry into the unit. Mom remained Mom, an unconventional, beautiful, free-spirited kook. She made no effort to make friends. I was the boldest of the triplets so I asked her why.‘Do you know how your Father's family would rather hack of a hand than go back on their word?' she gazed at me intently. I nodded. When she said 'Father' instead of 'Dad', this was our cue that this was a Major Life lesson we had best memorize. ‘These people aren't like that. They will take that which is not theirs, break trusts, sully families and lie to your face.'‘These women are all bold-faced whores, cock-hungry tramps and sluts who get abortions because they don't know what color the daddy is. The males are either the kind of men who would sleep with those kinds of women, or gutless wonders who won't fight for their rights as boyfriends, brothers, fathers, fiancés and spouses.'‘This is a colored thing, right?' I guessed. I wanted to be wrong.‘Got it in one,' Mom patted me on the shoulder. ‘Most White men in town are spineless wimps, Black men jump on whatever cunt they can crack open and women of either color put up with it, even beg for it. I know because I was once like them.'‘You and Dad?' I worried. Mom gave a deep, hearty laugh.‘That is not going to be a problem, I promise you. The only man for me is your Father,' she smiled. ‘I had plenty of lovers before your Dad. Since one month after I met him, I've never been with another man, or woman, or even wanted one.' More than I wanted to know, but good news none the less.While we were moving in the small amount of belongs that had followed us from Arkansas, two Kingston cops stopped by to see what we were doing. I had spent my entire life around law enforcement who knew about me and my clan. They were always friends and people we could trust. Kingston PD was a rude awakening we weren't in Alaska anymore.They were brusque and intimidating. Their real purpose was to remind my family the house was part of the town, even if the back acreage was not. Mom snorted at their pale deception. She asked to see their warrant. They asked if there was some reason they might need one. Mom politely asked them to leave as they were trespassing.They basked in their defiance. What could Mom really do? If she went all redneck and produced a gun, they'd lock her up, pointing weapons at law enforcement was stupid. Sadly for the cops, familiarity breeds understanding too. Mom gave us the April Fools' signal. Alexander, our oldest triplet, moved the cargo truck so it blocked the officers' view of their patrol car.While Mom looked peeved, feeding the Black cops sense of empowerment, my youngest triplet Mikhail and I (Vladimir) stripped their car of all easily removable parts; the dash-cam went first. They wanted to loiter around on our property? We let them behave stupidly. We dumped the parts and our work gloves in a packing box and carried it right past them.We walked straight out the back too. There was a burning barrel which we made prompt use of, for the oily gloves and box. We had spares. Mikhail tended the fire as I picked up a broken cinder block, a heavy-duty trash bag and walked a few hundred yards to the bog near the creek that ran through our property, county land. The bag and contents went into the bog.I used a branch to make sure it sunk deep before returning. Cleaning off my boots with the outdoor hose completed my destruction of evidence. Ten minutes later a member of the Arkansas Highway Patrol stopped by to see what the problem was. Mom had called them before the sabotage had even begun. She didn't know these two personally, but she knew from earlier visits to her aunt that these two were going to give us 'attitude'.Calling the Sheriff's Department would only cause a standoff where the police had the upper hand, the whole town jurisdiction thing. By the time the HP arrived, Alexander had left with the truck so when the Highway Patrolman began expressing concern for my Mom's civil rights, the two buck butt-bandits made to leave. That didn't work out well for them.First came the circus of the discovery they were missing key parts of their vehicle and the lack of an explanation of how that had happened. Mom wouldn't let the town cops search her place. She happily let the Highway Patrolman (who happened to be Black too) look around. We'd used the hose and the burning barrel because moving was nasty, sweaty work, especially in the Arkansas summer heat.The two policemen blamed us, the triplets. Mom asked them when, in the cops thirty minute trespass, had her 'little angels' stolen the parts, why we would do such a criminal thing, and if they knew where the parts might be. The Highway patrolman was kind of curious about the length of their stay as well.The cops lied, Mom went inside and brought back the camcorder that had taken in the entire event. They were caught in the lie and all they could claim was the cargo truck had been strategically placed to block a visual to their car; as we unloaded our truck. Mom even got the Highway Patrolman to co-sign her complaint to the Arkansas State Police Criminal Investigations department.Mom knew this one wouldn't go anywhere. She had lived with cops long enough to know the value of building up a case file. Alexander was off returning the truck in another county, so he was safe. Mom called him and Dad so they could hook up before Alexander came home. She counted on the cops to be petty and they were.Alexander was on a motorcycle. When he got pulled, the city cops pulled in front of him. Dad stopped as well. Despite their continuing pressure to make Dad leave, they had no legal grounds to do so, he was Alexander's father, who would be responsible for Alex's ride if they took him into custody. Being an off-duty sheriff's deputy wasn't good enough, yet Dad's point was telling.Cops always pull up behind a suspect, not ahead of them unless they want to ignore the dash-cam evidence. Dad had pulled up in his Sheriff's vehicle behind Alexander and his dash-cam was recording everything. They let Alexander off with a Warning Ticket and departed giving father and son dirty looks. School was five days off. We checked out the property for two days. The third morning my brothers and I, on motorcycles, decided to explore Kingston.Having never before confronted such blatant racism, we weren't afraid, we were furious. We hadn't done anything to anybody. We were from Alaskan-Russian stock and had never owned a person ever, as far as we knew. We certainly weren't invested in this whole 'Black slavery, White guilt' issue. Those who gave us attitude about 'White privilege' didn't care for our counter, that saying all White people were alike was equally racist.As Mom had warned us, Black people couldn't be racist; just ask them. Mind you, many of the town's Black residents were friendly and helpful. They just weren't friendly enough to defend us from the 'haters'. At the end of the first day, Mikhail nearly got in a fight with five members of the Black post-high school crowd who were fucking with, and sitting on, our bikes.Where we came from, that was rude in the extreme. When he appeared to be alone, they were boisterous enough. When Alexander and I stepped out of the pool hall (we'd been made unwelcome there), they backed off from their threatening rhetoric. They still wouldn't leave, or get off our bikes. The three versus five odds didn't deter us.It was the lack of faith in the local justice system that encouraged Alexander and me to hold Mikhail back. We had an answer to their intransience, crowding. It takes a great deal of cool to have three guys, all over six feet tall and 220 lbs. lean in on you while you are sitting down. When the current bastard was dealt with, we moved to the next. Before the group could figure a way to thwart us, we had retrieved our bikes and were headed home.The next day, we took Mom's 2012 Shelby V8 Mustang out for a drive. We found the three spots in town the 'White folk' hung out in. We had the Country Western Redneck posse' section of town, pseudo-riche Southerner clique downtown region, and the movie theater (theoretically neutral turf). The saner White middle class had departed for safer pastures, they had established their own municipality a few miles outside of town).The rednecks welcomed our physicality. We were attempting to fit in until they began talking about all those damn 'niggahs'. Alexander broke down after a bit and asked what a 'niggah' was. It was a 'coon'. Since that was of no help, we asked what a 'coon' was.The regulars found our naiveté amusing. It took us three minutes of running a verbal obstacle course to piece together that 'niggahs' was their inbred pronunciation of 'niggers' (a term we knew from TV and movies) which was idiot slang for a Black person. We were 'crackahs', idiot slang for crackers aka White people. Hispanics were 'beeners'; yeah, right.We also learned that the favorite activities for teenage rednecks was knocking over mailboxes as they sped down the road, beating up White girls who sucked Black cock and beating up 'niggahs' who touched White girls. My analysis was that these yahoos were long on talk and short on action.I wasn't a fashion icon yet I could tell these boys could use a bath and some fresh clothes. The girls who hung around this crowd looked about as loyal as salmon during spawning season. At 18, we were hardly experienced, but we weren't desperate virgins either. Girls we had just been introduced to, flirting with us and suggesting later sexual rendezvouses were a definite turn-off because God knows who else they'd been doing it with.That led us to the riche clique. Among the guys; half were snobbish closet gays who weren't our thing. The other half were rich straight guys pretending to be rednecks. Rich White girls pretended to be friends with the rich Black girls. They were used to being pampered by their rich White boyfriends while eyeing every Black stud that crossed their path.Until they realized Samsonov = Fonteneau, they were snide. After that, they tried to convince us we were all (distantly) related. Bloodlines and riches were not the basis for what we called friends so we politely postponed any celebrations.The Cineplex was a hunting ground for all ages. White women I was pretty sure were married to someone else engaged in sexual liaisons with Blacks; be they teens, business types, or lay-abouts. We had no idea if these were random hook-ups, or affairs and we didn't really care.Having wasted nine hours of our lives we definitely wanted back, we ended up rendezvousing with Mom and Dad at his boss's, the Sheriff's, place. Whatever else he was, Robert ‘Big Bob' Carson wasn't an underpaid county employee. His home was nice, expansive, relatively new and sitting on four wonderful acres of land, half woodland/half professionally maintained lawn and gardens. He had an expansive deck with a built-in grill, hot tub and pool out back.My brothers and I had been under the impression this would be an office outing. It ended up being our two families; the five of us, Big Bob and his daughter, Brandy Crystal Carson. There was no Mamma Carson in sight and a lack of family pictures was noticed by us and our Mom. Dad and Bob (it was tough to call him Big Bob when Dad was bigger than he was) were deep in conversation at the outdoor grill when I arrived.‘Vlad, come out here,' my Dad called to me in his easy going manner.‘Brandy!' Bob shouted. I promptly showed up. Dad wasn't a passionate disciplinarian. I didn't hustle out of fear. I hurried out because I wanted my Dad to look good in front of the Sheriff. ‘Hello Vlad,' Big Bob greeted me. ‘You are a strapping lad, big like your Daddy.'That was a bit odd. I had only heard one person call my Father 'Daddy'. That was my Mom when she was feeling frisky. Mom walked around the house naked when the mood struck her (even when we had guests over) and had few compunctions about hopping into Dad's lap when she wanted attention. That was a common enough occurrence that 'us' boys had learned to sneak out of the room quietly before we were ten.Only in the last two years had we figured out part of Mom's bizarre sexual behavior was caused by Dad being utterly clueless where women were concerned. He could spot a shoplifter at a glance, or an expired car registration at fifty feet on a moonless night. I had seen a car saleswoman hit on Dad when he was getting his newest pick-up. She did everything but flash her tits and do a striptease; it all went right over Dad's head.‘Brandy! Get your ass down here!' Bob bellowed. She must have been most of the way to us because she materialized five seconds later.‘Yes Daddy,' Brandy sounded bored. I was too busy gawking to see Big Bob's reaction to his daughter's insolence.Brandy was beyond gorgeous (according to my personal standards). She had pale-blonde hair in a ponytail that clearly went past her shoulder blades. Her caramel skin was the beneficiary of countless sessions with a tanning booth. Her eyes were the darkest blue I'd ever seen. Breasts, Jesus, they were large and firm. I could tell that because she had on a pink crop-top and no bra. I could almost see the bottoms of each orb.Her stomach was muscled with a thin layer of fatty tissue to give her real womanly curves and she had curves to spare. Her waist was narrow and her hips were wide, complimenting her breast size. She had on super-short, cut-off, 'faded-almost-to-White' denim jeans that accentuated her dark skin. Her ass was to die for. A bit big but well-muscled, each a perfect hemisphere.Her thighs and calves were the product of consistent exercise. Hot, hot, hot. She had on white tennis socks (no shoes) that finished off her delectable image.‘Brandy, this is Vladimir, Senior Deputy Samsonov's son. He's going to be your boyfriend this year,' Bob announced. I had a feeling this wasn't open for debate, in his mind.‘What!' Brandy squawked.‘What?' I looked to my Dad.‘What the fuck?' Brandy turned and glared at me. I would have enjoyed her breasts bouncing more if I hadn't been eyeballing my patriarch.‘Dad?' I kept my voice calm. Brandy was fantastic looking, but I didn't want anyone dictating my social life, period. I was eighteen. Besides, Brandy was turning out to have a far less appealing personality, Pretty Princess syndrome.‘Brandy, Vladimir's a nice boy. His father is 'good people',' Bob laid out his case.How did he know I was a good boy? He was taking a lot on faith.‘I don't want to date this loser,' Brandy shouted. 'Loser'? She didn't knew me either.‘If you don't keep Vlad as your boyfriend, then no cheerleading and no dance team,' Bob glared at his daughter. This clash of wills made no sense to me.‘No way!' Brandy glanced back at her Dad, protested loudly and stomped her foot on the wooden deck.‘Well then, you need to be home at 3:20 pm every school day,' Bob threatened. ‘And I'll make sure to check up on you.' Before I could wonder about Big Bob's abuse of power, I noted the state of the art security system, cyber-nanny.Brandy turned on me in a furor. Her face was screwed up with anger, her fists were clenched and I was working double-time to not ogle the cleave she enhanced by leaning forward. Man, she hated me for reasons I couldn't fathom. I disgusted her which I didn't get either. Plenty of non-relative women had called me good-looking and handsome.I had a healthy, well-defined physique, nice thick, blonde hair and the common sense to keep my body and clothes clean and casual. My only downside I'd ever been told about was my size, I was tall for my age and 'cut'. Brandy was 5' 4'. I was 6' 2'. I had stormy grey eyes, light blonde hair the color of wheat and skin spared the ravages of acne.‘Brandy, I am as uncomfortable and surprised about this as you are,' I tried to placate her. ‘Do you want to talk about it?' She forced herself to appear calm.‘Fine Victor,' she grumbled. Worse than getting my name wrong was the look of viciousness that glimmered in her eyes. ‘We'll make Daddy happy and be a cookie-cutter couple.'‘Dad?' I tried to exit this fiasco with some decorum.‘You'll do fine son,' he responded. That wasn't helpful.‘I'll see you Monday morning, Victor,' Brandy snidely mocked me before leaving. I turned to follow her thunderous retreat.Running after her would have felt pathetic so my sedate pursuit meant she put some distance between us. She ran right into Mom, who grabbed her arm.‘I'm warning you right now,' Mom hissed. ‘Don't have sex with any of my sons.'‘That won't be a problem,' Brandy snorted. I was filth in her mind

The Hoes and Bitches Need A Champion.Based on a post by FinalStand, in 13 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at Explicit Novels.‘Once you go Black, you don’t go back; unless you are an Amerindian, Arabic, Asian, Black, Indian, Latina, or White girl, or guy who has tried Black, then found sexual fulfillment with a non-Black person and created a blissful relationship with them'Introduction:Right off the bat, be warned that I’m using the ‘N’ words, nigger, niggah, my niggah, plus homie, thug, coon, buck, spook, spade and whatever other crude racial slurs that come to mind. This story plays to both Black and White stereotypes.Lastly, this story is rather flippant with the entire concept of sexual assault. Those who have red my previous tales know this is not my attitude at all. For the sake of this genre I had to grapple with the concept of forcing a woman and 'making them love that cock’Prelude:My tale begins as the Winter Man Saga 1300 years ago, about the year 700 AD. One small clan of my Swedish ancestors lost a brutal feud with their neighbors. Their farms were burned, animals slaughtered and their women and children taken as slaves. Only three young brother-warriors survived, wounded but unconquered. The victors chased them high into the mountains when a terrible winter storm struck.The three brothers were trudging across a glacier between the mountain peaks in Whiteout conditions. The lead brother stepped into a crevasse and slid to the bottom of the glacier. Not giving up on their last kinsman, the other two slid down into the darkness after him. At the roots of that glacier they found an ice cavern formed by snow that fell 100,000 years ago.They melted the ice for water with their body heat and in doing so, unleashed a demoness (virus) that no man had ever known and survived. The three men grew very sick, but their fierce desire for vengeance kept them from succumbing. When they emerged from their icy tomb, they discovered that several of their pursuers had frozen to death in the blizzard and the rest had returned to their stolen homes and purloined lands, thinking the three brothers were dead.In the dark of the long northern night, they snuck upon the Great Hall of their enemies. When one of the brothers saw his 'former’ wife doing a slave’s work, he revealed himself to her. She rejoiced at the return of her love; physically, then brought the three table scraps to survive on. In the process, they learned that their sisters were also alive and the sexual playthings of their male nemeses.Due to the depth of winter, stealing back their womenfolk wasn’t possible. They’d all freeze to death if they didn’t starve first. To repay their enemy’s wickedness, one of the brother’s snapped and raped one of the chief’s daughters. He was possessed with an unearthly desire and held her in a stable for hours. Only when he was utterly spent did he fall asleep.She ran to her father and returned with many warriors. So the first of the brothers was taken. He was tortured and abused. For three long nights he suffered at the hands of his captors yet refused to admit any of his other brothers were still alive. After that third night, the chief’s daughter sneaked past the sleeping guards of the chained man, and raped him.For the next five nights, while her father, brothers and husband slept, she raped and raped and raped that brother. On the fifth night, a sister-in-law caught her at it. The daughter pled for the other to spare her; that the man’s sexual prowess had ensnared her. She even challenged her kinswoman to sample the 'fruit’ before turning her in. Five women later, the brother cracked and told the women how to find his brothers.The night after the Spring Equinox Celebrations, the women of their enemy rose up and slaughtered all their adult menfolk at the behest of the three brothers, on the conditions that their youngest sons be spared and that the men continue to share their favors with all the womenfolk (who were not their kin).The Sammi ClanThe isolated region of the land of the Swedes kept my ancestors out of contact with the wider world for some time. Many generations later, a son of that clan came to lead a band of (female) Finns. His Swedish name is forgotten. The Finns called him Sami (the Exalted One, no shit). He and this band took to fur trading along the Eastern tributaries of the Volga.In time, this group became identified with the Varangian. The Sons of Sami intermarried with the Slavs, becoming Slavicized and the Sons of Sami became Samsonovs. They followed the Rus expansion into the eastern tributaries of the Volga reaching Nizhny Novgorod in the 10th century.Then came the Mongol Conquest, the Tartar Yoke, Rus reunification and the Russian drive across Siberia. The Samsonovs remained tightly clannish and uncomfortable in urban settings. That wanderlust led them across the Bering Straits into Alaska where their genetic abnormality, the gift of that ancient demoness (virus), slumbered in isolation and monogamy.After a thousand years, the tales of mass orgies with strange women and protective female war bands faded into obscurity. Then my Mom, the brilliant, driven eccentric came along. Once she became enraptured with her own Samsonov lover, she had to know the secret of Samsonov men’s sexual prowess.With her burning intellect and educational background, she eventually figured it out. She was also amoral enough to keep the knowledge to herself and vengeful enough to plan to use our curse as a weapon.My Living Family·         Father, Nikolay 'Nik’ Samsonov;·         Mother, Gayle Fonteneau Samsonov;·         The Triplets, Alexander 'Alex’, Mikhail and Vladimir 'Vlad’; that's me.Sitting at the dinner table, I protested; ‘Mom, You actually expect me to believe my Father, Brothers and I have the genetic capability to addict every woman we have sex with to our schlongs? That’s nuts!'Mom retorted; ‘As opposed to thinking the color, length and girth of a phallus makes any woman lose all sense of loyalty, morality and decorum so she can become a man’s sex sleeve, whore, bitch, property? Yes, I do.'The lives of my family took an unexpected detour in the spring of this year. My great-aunt Matilda (Mattie) died and willed her estate to Mom. I had never met the woman while she was alive yet in death she would have a profound effect on all our lives. Mom’s family was a mess; a crowded dingy with a madhouse of odd characters.Lionel was my eldest maternal uncle. He was a Big, Bulging Brain working as a Chief Technical Advisor for NASA; a solitary crusader for all Mankind. What was he a technical advisor for? If anything left terra firma for more than fifteen seconds, he knew every detail about it. That included volcanic eruptions too. When we were younger, he invited us to various volcanoes (both above and beneath the waves). Great guy.Cassius, my second uncle, was serving time in Indonesia for piracy. Mom said he was meaner than every saltwater crocodile that ever lived. The two times I’d met him, he’d been a lean, happy laconic kind of guy with a love for military history. Mom said he was a charismatic rebel who was possessed by an obsession to defy authority in all its forms.Dido was child number three; my Mom’s older sister, married to an Evangelical Televangelist in Nebraska under an assumed name, Paula Richmond. She also had a MD in Psychiatry and a Master’s in Public Communications (under her real name), which she kept secret from the fundamentalist congregation. The few times we met; she was the perfect mother. Secretly, we three sons wished she’d been our mother instead of our real mother. Mom said Aunt Dido was a master manipulator and wielded a cruel whip;Then there was Mom’s twin, Uncle Theo, who never lived in one place, traveled all around the globe and had every law enforcement agency in the civilized world looking for him. We always receiving presents from him during all the normal holidays; like Michaelmas, Holy Week, the start of Lent, Martinmas (his favorite) and our birthdays; which arrived at random, unrelated times of the year and never from the same location.He was the only one we’d never met, but the one Mom loved the most. Dad suspected he was a narco-trafficker while Mom insisted he was too paranoid to be considered reliable for that line of work. Mom told us he’d spent his formative years killing people for Uncle Sam until one day he simply walked away from Fort Bragg and became an independent contractor.The Defense Department sent some fine, brave men from Joint Special Operation Command, to talk to Mom every few months. They made sure not to trip over the CIA and Homeland Security types who occasionally staked out our house. We boys guessed they came around every time Uncle Theo assassinated people. Mom taught us how to appreciate them in an elaborate ritual she called 'April Fool’s, which became an 'any day of the year’ activity.My Mom’s father (I never met the guy) was a leader of a cult in Nevada. He went down, guns blazing during a DEA raid. Apparently his interests included both harems and marijuana production.Mom’s mom? She left my Mother outside a dive bar in San Diego and was never seen again. She had doctorates in Biology and Physics as well as the reputation for being a certifiable Space Cadet. Mom insisted her mom hadn’t abandoned her, she’d simply forgotten where she left her youngest daughter who was 15 at the time.After five days, Mom decided to join an Alternative Rock band instead of looking for the lady yet again. Seven years later, she was declared legally dead; though all her offspring believed she was still alive; somewhere; doing something.Then you had Dad’s family. We had some characters on that side of the family, just not like Mom’s. For starters, Samsonovs were bred for law enforcement. We’d been arresting bad guys since the 1500’s. We’d been doing that in Alaska since the time of the tsars. When the Alaskan Territory was sold to the United States; well, my ancestors simply started writing their reports in English instead of Russian.Over the centuries, we had bagged serial killers, smugglers, poachers, drug dealers, domestic abusers and thieves. Mostly they arrested drunks and wackos. My Great Grandfather Petrov was a law enforcement legend in Alaska. Alone, he ran down a pack of murderous robbers in the dead of winter before they made it to 'safety’ in the Yukon Territory.In the spring, they found them frozen solid, him leading five men, he recorded in his journal he’d killed the other three while apprehending the gang, back in chains. That pretty much defined the nature of my Father’s family, no too many stellar geniuses, but always relentless past all norms of endurance and reason. The moment females were allowed in law enforcement, the womenfolk joined the profession.My Aunt Iliana was in the Coast Guard, that made her the 'Black sheep’ in this clan. Taking the law out to the high seas was about as wild as Dad’s family got. Dad was pretty much the standard issue for my kin. Big, Dad was 6’ 5' and 290 lbs., and about as imaginative as a glacier. Why Mom married Dad had long been a mystery to his sons.Don’t get me wrong. I loved my Dad, but the man used a grand total of twenty different sentences his entire life. The fewer words he had to speak, the happier he was. He was a nice guy, never drinking too much and I’d never seen him lose his temper. He smiled, was unerringly polite and had always been helpful and playful with us kids from our earliest memories.Grandpa, my great-aunts and -uncles, my aunts, uncles and cousins by blood were the exact same way. I mean that quite literally. We all pretty much looked alike as well. Those who married, married eccentrics. In our regular family get-togethers that translated over to the blood kin in one room saying and doing nothing (we were already cluing into some sort of primitive telepathy) and being very happy that way, while the married relations were in another room packing on the lunacy.There was no middle ground; you were either a silent, brooding peak in the Samsonov mountain range, or the aurora borealis. That left me and my brothers, we were triplets, in a precarious position. We looked like smaller versions of our Dad (we were still growing) yet were totally at the mercy of our Mother most of our young lives. Recall what I said about eccentrics and lunatic behavior. Mom was the Queen of the Asylum.Mom quickly fell in love with ’things’ and she loved doing those things with family. Since Dad worked long hours, family meant my brothers and me. We could make passable pottery by age seven. Krav Maga? Screw this ’driving to some dojo in Anchorage’ crap. Mom signed us up for a two week course in Israel and online lessons for a year. Archery, check. Rewiring our house and refitting all the plumbing, check.The three of us were SCA squires at age 12. Pleading to Dad was pointless. He’d smile, mess up our hair and remind us these excursions made our Mother happy aka he wasn’t going to help us have normal lives. We had some ex-Green Beret guys teach us outdoor survival skills in Wyoming. We could pull wool, make thread and knit a set of pants and sweaters.I and my brothers had to memorize 1200 medically useful plants before we could get our Christmas presents when we were 14. We free-climbed mountains, ran 10Kms, kayaked, were proficient seamen on a sailing ship and learned how to navigate by the Sun, Moon and stars. Around the age of 15, we figured out that Mom had a ton of money squirreled away. There was no way Dad, with his civil servant’s salary, could afford all this crazy shit.By the age of 18 we had such a crazy patchwork set of skills, we weren’t sure what we would end up doing with our lives; though tracking down Uncle Theo and living a life on the run was looking more attractive every month. What we didn’t have were great social lives. We all had girlfriends at one time, or another, but they never lasted.Right before any of us were about to get serious with any girl in high school, my Mom dragged us off; to things like a five day course on Renaissance artwork in Milan; that’s Italy. We had to learn to speak Italian in three days, plus during the flight over. Mom made it easy for us. We could only speak Italian the entire time. Doing that at school was 'fun’. Dad? He smiled and said nothing for three days.Welcome to the Fonteneau House, Kingston, ArkansasAnyway, Mom’s Great-aunt Mattie kicked the bucket and left her vast fortune in northwestern Arkansas to my Mom. The old bird hated the rest of the nutjobs in the clan, but adored my Mom (and Theo). Upon receiving the news, my brothers and I began thinking the same thing: banjo lessons, redneck stunts and girls in Daisy Dukes. By 'fortune’ we were thinking a ramshackle Ozark shack sitting on a mountain top.Nope. Great-aunt Mattie was loaded. In fact, Mom’s whole family had tons of money. They’d made a killing, quite literally, during the White expansion westward using various despicable means. They’d even been cursed by an entire Indian Tribe for bilking them off their land. Mom’s family blamed that malediction for their bizarre behavior.That Arkansas home was actually the summer residence for the Fonteneau clan from a hundred years ago. Along with the palatial residence came thousands upon thousands of acres spread over a quarter of the state (and some land in Texas, Missouri and Oklahoma too).Tara, or the Biltmore estate, it was not, but it certainly had pretensions. It was a wide and roomy, rambling Victorian structure. The house proper (there were two barns, a stable, storage sheds, two garages, one attached and the other stand-alone, semi-attached servant quarters and four outlying hunting lodges) abutted the Kingston town limits.The place was big enough to require Mom to employ six staff;Phineas Cobb the third, an angry, sullen old White guy and his carbon-copy son, Phineas IV, were our two Wardens. That meant they took care of the outlying property which included hunting down poachers, interlopers and moonshiners (the competition, no doubt) and seeing to the upkeep of the various lodges, roads, trails and bridges around the place. Phineas the third and Mom; well, he cried and hugged Mom when he saw her, so we didn’t know what to think of him and his son.Bebe Marston worked the stables and the twelve horses therein. She was a college dropout, White and 21; a woman at one of life’s crossroads. Great Aunt Mattie brought her on a few months before she passed on. Bebe was a bit shy and distant around the menfolk. Mom treated Bebe like her long lost daughter; they got along fine.Thomas Freeman was the groundskeeper. Thomas seemed nice enough, a polite and somewhat deferential older Black man. I liked him. Mom fired him the moment the lawyer finished reading Maggie’s Will. She believed the man was a back-biter, liar and a thief.Kamika Perry was the cook. She was a largish, plump Black woman with a large family in town. She was a tyrant in the kitchen but friendly and out-going everywhere else. She knew Mom from before; before what, we didn’t know. She was close to Mom’s age and was the niece of the former cook. She and Mom were cordial yet a tad formal.Nefertiti Cooke was the upstairs maid. She was a whip-tin attractive Black woman in her late-20s and joined Thomas heading out the door. Mom discharged her due to Nefertiti’s sour attitude and general unwillingness to adhere to a work schedule.Anita Turner was our downstairs maid and overall manager of the other servants. Like Kamika, she knew Mom from her previous stay at the house, though Anita was already part of the staff back then. They acted like old friends though they understood the mistress-servant dynamics of their relationship.Mom solved our labor shortage by bringing in Mexicans (Hondurans actually). The two families divided up the nine rooms in the detached servants’ quarters with Bebe, since Anita and Kamika lived in town and the Cobb’s had their own cottage somewhere on the property.Hector Martinez became our new groundskeeper. He had a wife, Maria. Mom enrolled her in some online college courses so she could get a teaching license. They were both pretty young.Consuela Castro was our new upstairs maid. She was a single mother with a son, Gustavo (10), and a daughter, Isabo (6); they went to the local elementary school in town. Both families were very nice to us and seemed happy with their current circumstance. Since this job was their first go at being domestic servants, Mom told us to be patient and respectful while they learned the ropes from Anita and Mr. Cobb (only Mom could call him Phineas without pissing him off).My brothers and I, our Father, the Martinez’s and the Castro’s couldn’t have predicted the shit-storm Mom was creating between our house and the dominant Black populace of Kingston along the great racial divide. The Hondurans had spent half their lives learning to keep their heads low when faced with discrimination. We didn’t, nor did we know that Mom was acting with deliberate malice of forethought at that time.To help appreciate our understanding of the situation, we triplets had known a grand total of four Black people well enough to call them by their Christian names our entire lives. On

This special bonus episode on The Muscle Car Place is brought to you live from the Holley Moparty 2024 produced by FM3 event services at the Beech Bend raceway in Bowling Green Kentucky! All of your favorite show hosts and co-hosts loaded up and drove out to the birthplace of new Corvettes and the global headquarters of Holley Performance Products to see the fifth annual gathering of Mopar enthusiasts. Many old and new Dodge, Plymouth, Chrysler, AMC, and Jeep vehicles were there showing off just how unique this crowd can be. We got to show up and interview some of the interesting people there and bring it to you to get an idea of how the whole event went down. This year the whole gang was able to get together and just hang out and have a great time with cars. Cody Young (@CodyCrafted ), Garrett Daniels (RnDFabworks.com), Nathan Warren (@warren_customs_llc ), Corndog, Bernie, and myself roamed around the Moparty event checking out the Drag Racing, Autocross, Swap meet and the amazing show cars. We got so much content that we put it into two shows. You can check it out on the Kibbe and Friends show episode 307 where we talk about the event and we interview the one and only Daisy Duke, Ms Catherine Bach! We met up with her only inches away from the "Kibbe Lee" and discussed the show and her life with the questions every Dukes fan wants to know. The post TMCP #587: Holley Moparty 2024 Live Show! Youtuber Dylan McCool's Backwoods '69 Charger, Blake Andermann ‘s Easy Engine Swap Kits, Superfan Stuntman Raymond Kohn's Adventures of Flying the General Lee (29 Times)! first appeared on The Muscle Car Place.

As most of you know, our Patreon audience has the INSIDE access to the KF Show. The year 2024 will be an important one for Patreon specifically and if you'd consider jumping up to the $5 level it would sure help. The $10 level will remain and we now have a brand new $20 level as well! All members who join at that level will receive a sticker swag pack in the mail, you'll be IMMEDIATELY entered in the monthly prize grab, and you'll receive a phone call from one (or all) of us to chat up whatever you want for 30 minutes! Thank you SO MUCH to those of you who have joined in for the extra content that is only for Patreon supporters. To get in on the action and support the show with a minor financial contribution just click the link below to sign up. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW ======================================== Presented with Holley - Back for 2024!  Phase 3 of Kibbe and Friends is officially here, and Holley is back for more fun, foolishness, and flying orange Chargers! Once again we're proud to be associated with the historic name that has made cars fast for years and years, and their innovations continue forward (as always)! As announced in this episode, MOPARTY 2024 is officially on the calendar! Join is there Sept 13-15 and get registered at https://moparty.com. See you there! ======================================== Corndog's Pick - Dukes Review: S1E2 "Daisy's Song" Note: This Dukes episode was originally reviewed by Rob Kibbe and Mike Finnegan in Episode 277 of The MuscleCar Place. It was part of the "DukesCast" segment...and predates the Kibbe and Friends show entirely! This episodes is THE episode with every last detail on the Daisy Roadrunner that Corndog is creating his replica of! His car will be at MOPARTY 2024 for Catherine Bach's use!  K&F Show Summary: In this second ever episode of the Dukes of Hazzard we learn that Daisy Duke is an aspiring songstress. She spends her own money to have a song published, it is, and it is then recorded professionally but a real country singer.,......all so that we get to watch her show up in a 70's one piece that is definitely still in fashion. Bo and Luke trick the bad guys into thinking Daisy can be an "AI" impersonator of real singers so they can then sell the now fake records for real money. And it turns out that the bad guys are really run by Boss Hogg, which is honeying up to women and trying to get in cahoots with - effectively - the mob! This may be the weirdest, coolest, and most true-to-it's creator (Gy Waldron) episode ever…..and it has the full details on the Daisy RoadRunner that our man Corndog is preparing this very second. 10 Corndogs! Original Review: Episode 277 of The MuscleCar Place Legit Episode Info Season 1 - Episode 2 “Daisy's Song” Written by Gy Waldron Directed by Bob Kelljan Airdate: 2/2/1979 ======================================== Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW Kibbe, Corndog, and the Bern! National Parts Depot Presents: Bernie on the News! https://www.npdlink.com. The post K&F Show #306: AI Corndog and the Countdown to MOPARTY 2024 (or Bust); Dukes Review: S1E2 “Daisy's Song” first appeared on The Muscle Car Place.

 An escort asks her best friend for help on a job.by  Cybotic. listen to the podcast at Steamy Stories.  Erotic Appointment:Sophie stared at her friend in shock. “You can't be serious!”Millie was red-faced, but desperate. “Please? There's nobody else I can ask. I need your help.”“How long have you been doing this?”“Almost two years.”“Two years?” Sophie exclaimed. “And you kept it from me? We've been best friends for twenty years, ever since kindergarten. How could you not tell me?”“Look, it started when I took that trip to Australia to see my grandmother just before she died. I had exhausted my savings just getting down there. I had no money for the return trip or to cover my rent or car payment when I did get back.”“Okay,” Sophie said. “You could have called me. I would have found a way to help.”“I almost did. But then I was sitting in a bar in Sydney, drinking my last twenty dollars. A creepy, older man tried to pick me up. I said No. I turned him down flat. Then he offered me money. And I said Yes. I have been saying Yes ever since. I built a website and advertised on various escort sites. I got a new phone for my new job. And I was too embarrassed to tell you any of that.”Sophie realized that she had no right to judge Mellie. She had herself once been living with a boyfriend she'd come to despise. But she'd delayed ending the relationship because he was paying the rent and she couldn't afford a place of her own. She'd had sex with a guy for financial reasons. Morally, she'd made the same choice as her friend. It would be hypocritical to refuse her friend this favor.“All right,” she said, reluctantly agreeing. “I'll do it. Just don't expect me to make a habit of this. When and where does this happen?”“Tonight. I've booked a room at the Brighton Hotel,” Mellie said, relieved that she wouldn't have to cancel.“What do I wear to something like this?” Sophie asked, picturing a Victoria's Secret runway model.“Something comfortable but attractive. Jeans and a T-shirt. Or a dress if you'd like. It doesn't have to be sexy, so long as we don't look like slobs.”“Lingerie?”“Not necessary. See, we don't have to seduce these guys. No effort required. The moment they went on my website and clicked the ‘Book Appointment' link, the seduction was accomplished. I don't usually bother with underwear at all. Less to take off and put on again. But bring a swimsuit. We can use the hotel pool before the appointment.“"And after?” Sophie said, thinking how dirty she would probably feel afterward.“Well, you can get back in the pool afterward,” Mellie agreed. “I won't have time. I have more than one date scheduled tonight.”“How many?”“Four more. Five, altogether. If nobody cancels, it will be a busy night.”“Five? Really? You're going to let five different guys fuck you? In one night?”“That's the job,” Mellie said with a light laugh. “I've been fucked by more than a thousand men in the two years I've been at this.”“You count them?”“I do, yes. At first, I kept a journal, detailing each encounter. But it got to be too tedious. The experiences are exciting and fun but writing about them gets repetitive. Eventually, I was just making quick notes of the date, the location, and a description of the guy with whatever name he gives me. And since I always verify appointments by phone, I also have each guy's number. And I put it all in a database file. It helps a lot when I get repeat clients and regulars. I can look at my records and know a guy's likes and preferences. And, as a bonus, I know for a fact that I've been with over a thousand different men.”“Wow,” Sophie whispered. “Aren't you afraid of getting pregnant? Or a disease?”“I'm on birth control. And there is this special tree that grows in Australia. The Spotted Melaleuca. It produces an oil that enhances the human immune system. Almost 100% of infections are prevented. And the very few that aren't stopped completely are too weak and damaged to cause any harm. A girl I met down there is sending me a regular supply of Spotted Melaleuca tea. I never get sick anymore. No viruses. No bacteria. I can't even get food poisoning.”“Why don't they sell it here?”“Australia won't allow it to be exported. The US and Germany would rip out the forests to claim all of it for themselves.”“Can I have some of the tea?”“That depends,” Millie said. “It's pretty expensive stuff. Do you know what OWO means? Or BBBJ?”“No. Is that important?”“How about CIM?”“Again, I must say No.”“One more. Do you know what FS means?”“No clue,” Sophie said with a shrug.“OK. They're all shortcut terms escorts use. OWO means Oral With Out. Without a condom, that is. BBBJ, Bareback Blowjob, means the same thing. CIM means Come In Mouth. And FS means Full Service. That refers to regular penis-in-vagina sex. These are pretty standard offerings."I'm a very popular escort because I offer even more. My clients can get BBFS and CIP. That's Bareback Full Service and Cum In Pussy. I don't require condoms if the guy is willing to pay my Bareback rates. These guys coming tonight have already agreed to the rate. If you're willing to provide the service, I'll share my Melaleuca stash.”Sophie didn't have an answer. “I don't know. I can't promise anything. But if you'll let me have some of the tea, I promise to seriously consider trying.” She didn't even let her boyfriends fuck her without a condom. Now Millie was asking her to let a total stranger do it. And even to let him come inside her. She wasn't sure she could do it, Melaleuca or not.But Mellie was satisfied with even the possibility. She handed Sophie an envelope she'd pre-prepared, just in case they came to an agreement. It contained the hotel room number and a keycard, a note as to the time of the appointment, and a packet of the Melaleuca tea, with instructions. Then she left to make her own preparations.She returned at 1:30 to pick her up and drove them both to the hotel. After checking in, Mellie bought them lunch in the restaurant's little café, then they got into their bikinis to enjoy the pool. Sophie noticed a couple of older guys staring at her, paying a lot of attention to her tits.Usually, such a thing annoyed her. But she was here to have sex with a stranger. By comparison, it didn't seem to matter that these strangers were lusting after her. So let them look. Let them drool. She even managed to laugh when Mellie “accidentally” flashed them.At seven p.m., they went up to their room. They took turns in the shower, then got dressed. To boost her confidence for the upcoming ordeal, Sophie needed to make herself feel sexy. So she had chosen a pair of Daisy Dukes and a pink half-shirt. No bra. No panties. Mellie laughed to see her, wearing the comfortable jeans and t-shirt she had suggested to Sophie.At seven-thirty, the clients texted Mellie to confirm their appointment. She sent them the name of the hotel and the room number and told them to be prompt.At seven-fifty-four, the detectives on television were wrapping up the murder of a call girl, a storyline that didn't give Sophie much confidence. She took a big gulp of the whiskey Mellie offered her and savored the burn and buzz as the last few minutes counted down.At seven fifty-eight, there was a knock on the door. Sophie stood and watched as Mellie let the two guys in. They were not unattractive, but they were middle-aged and a little overweight. Neither was someone she'd give more than a glance at if she'd seen them in a bar.The taller, blonde one seemed nervous and inexperienced. Sophie suspected it was his first time engaging a prostitute. But the shorter guy, with the slight smirk on his face, had an expression that said this was nothing new for him. She wondered which one was hers.“Come in!” Mellie said to them. “As I told you in the text, Michelle couldn't come tonight. This is my friend Sabrina.” For tonight, Sophie was Sabrina.“Is she as friendly as you?” the shorter one asked.“She's very friendly,” Mellie said. “But how friendly do you want her to be?”“Does she do bareback?”Mellie glanced over at her friend. Sophie forced herself to nod. It was a tiny, brief gesture, barely there at all, but the message was communicated.“She does,” Mellie told the guys. “If you meet the price.”“That's no problem. A thousand dollars, right?”“Yes. But that's a thousand per guy, per girl. If you each want to fuck a girl, no condom, and come inside her, you each have to pay a thousand. If at some point you want to switch girls, that's another thousand each.”The short one nodded. “All right. I don't think we'll be switching. Just one on one. Bareback for both.”“Fine,” Mellie told him. “Two thousand dollars, please.”Sophie watched as the men paid Mellie. There was more negotiating and more money changing hands, but she had stopped listening. She'd forgotten to ask if she was going to get any of that money. A thousand dollars would be nice. She wasn't entirely sure she wanted it, though. Fucking one of these guys as a favor for a friend was one thing. If she took the money, she'd be a prostitute herself. She wasn't ready to make that choice yet.But she'd already agreed to the first part. And Mellie had the money. Whether Sophie got any of it or not, it was time to honor her promise. Mellie already had her shirt off and was shimmying out of her jeans.Other than a thong bikini she'd never had the guts to put on, Sophie was wearing the skimpiest clothes she owned and no underwear. It was supposed to make it easier to undress at this moment. But there was still a significant difference between almost naked and naked.It was kind of a relief when the short one came up to her, grabbed the hem of her shirt, and asked, “May I?” Sophie nodded and let him pull it up and over her head, leaving her tits bare for this guy she didn't even know.She didn't want his hands on her again, so she took the initiative and removed her Daisy Dukes herself. Now she and Mellie were both naked. And in front of two fully-dressed men she'd only just met. She'd had nightmares like this. But there was a strange excitement about feeling their hot eyes on her.The short one started moving toward her, but she wasn't quite ready for that. To stall him, she pointed at his clothes. “Your turn,” she said. She was more than a little intimidated at the idea of seeing him naked, but she was surprised to find she was looking forward to it as well.She didn't know their names, and she didn't want to. But she needed some new way to label them. It was inappropriate to keep calling this man “the short one” as he was taller than Mellie or herself. Prostitutes called their customers “johns,” she remembered. As she was about to commit her very first act of prostitution, it would be fitting to refer to them as John 1 and John 2.And John 1 now had his clothes off. His dick was stiff and pointing at Sophie with clear intention. But Mellie had rules for these encounters. “Did you guys read the website?”“Of course,” John 1 answered.“Then you remember that you're required to take a shower first. Hurry up so we can get down to business.”The guys went into the bathroom, leaving the door open, obviously uncomfortable being naked with each other. They were in and out within five minutes.“Blowjobs first,” Mellie whispered in her ear as the guys came out, toweling off vigorously. “You have given one before, haven't you?”“Of course,” Sophie hissed back. “I taught you how to do it, remember?”“Oh, right! The banana. Back in the dorms. That was a valuable lesson.”But the guys were ready now. Mellie took John 2 to one of the hotel beds. Sophie followed her example and led John 1 to the other. He sat down and scooted back expectantly, lying back with his legs spread and his hands behind his head.Sophie was almost amused. If some boyfriend had waited so arrogantly to be serviced, she would have teased him to the point of torture before finally refusing. But this guy had a right to his expectations.This was it. No more delays. But Sophie was ready now. And she enjoyed giving blowjobs. She had turned it into an art form. Back in college, she had insisted that Mellie learn how to give head. But Sophie had picked up new skills and techniques since then.John 1 smelled like soap, which Sophie appreciated. She liked Mellie's shower rule. Starting at his feet, Sophie ran her hands up his legs, slowly, tickling as she did so. But she stopped short of his groin. She had special plans for that area.Sophie didn't give blowjobs any more. She gave massages with her tongue. Where her fingers had stopped stroking, she started to lick, tasting his upper thighs. She let her cheek brush against his balls but otherwise ignored them. Their time was coming.Like a cat, she bathed him, licking his thighs, his abdomen, almost to his navel, making a wide circle around his jutting erection, careful to avoid contact. With her thumbs, she rubbed the valley where his legs met his body, just a millimeter or two from his balls.He grunted lightly when her thumb lightly brushed against the little ball hairs. It was a barely-there touch. It could have almost been an accident. With her tongue circling his cock, coming ever closer, there was almost no chance that such a thing would happen accidentally. But it was possible.And that held a great deal of the eroticism.Sophie knew that when a girl flashes her boyfriend, it's exciting for them both. But if a guy just happens to see the wind blow up the skirt of a girl not wearing underwear or if he spies on a girl skinny-dipping in a creek, that's even more of a thrill. It's the same for the girl who decides not to put on panties on a very windy day or swims naked in a stream when she knows there are guys nearby that might see her. Sexy little accidents are much more erotic than anything deliberate, even if the accidents themselves are deliberate.Sophie brought her tongue to the base of the cock and licked around it, never climbing higher up the shaft than the roots of the curling hairs. She'd read a book once that described blowjob techniques and she'd practiced them on an old boyfriend. And right now, it was much easier to simply go through the exercises than to think about the total stranger whose penis she was tasting. And she absolutely did not want to remember that this performance had been paid for.“My mother would be so ashamed,” Sophie thought to herself as she massaged the john's balls with her tongue. She liked the tight, wrinkly skin and the taste of male sweat. It wasn't a pleasant flavor, but it was an exciting one. Sophie could feel her pussy watering just from the mental stimulation of pleasing this dick.A quick glance to the other bed showed her that Mellie was already bobbing up and down on John 2. It wasn't a race, but Sophie was a big believer in fair play. What one john got, the other should get. It was time to stop teasing.She ran her tongue up the underside of John 1's cock, from his balls to the crown to the very tip. Because it excited her, she did it again a second time. She almost giggled when the john shivered with delight under her efforts.As she reached the tip of him again, she opened her lips and took him in. He was thick and hot in her mouth. Sophie pushed her head forward, letting him slide deeper until he was almost triggering her gag reflex. As much as she enjoyed giving head, deep-throating was beyond her capabilities. But just filling her mouth with him was just thrilling.It had been months, almost a year, since Sophie had last tasted a cock. She'd missed it. Her last boyfriend had left after she'd caught him cheating and she'd been unwilling to get this close to any guy since.Perhaps there were benefits to Mellie's lifestyle. A cock in her mouth every single day, for one. Sophie could definitely go for an arrangement like that. And she would have no reason for jealousy. She'd be the reason for other women to get jealous. The whore is not even the other woman in such an encounter. She's just a vendor, selling a service to the guy who wants more than the wife and the mistress.Sophie bobbed on him, swiping her tongue back and forth as she slid her lips up and down his shaft. He was breathing heavily and moaning as she worked his dick with her mouth. She could almost taste his cum and wanted it on her tongue.But John 1 was grabbing her head and pushing her off and away. “No,” he said. “I need to fuck your cunt.”It was the worst of the bad words. But Sophie welcomed it. She was not a woman today. She was a cunt. A professional cunt. A cunt for hire.But she was also a pair of professional tits. Sophie moved up the john's body and let his cock nestle between her tits. She lowered her head and kissed his belly, moving from side to side, massaging the dick with her breasts.The john was getting impatient, she sensed. Sophie sighed with some regret, enjoying the penis on her tits. But she had a job to do, even if she wasn't getting paid for it. She crawled up the bed and flopped down on her back next to John 1. “Fuck me,” she said.“No condom?” he asked, making sure he was clear on the agreement.“No condom,” Sophie confirmed. “Put it in bareback. Come right inside me.”John 1 climbed on top of her. Sophie opened her legs in welcome, lifting her knees to give him a cradle. She reached down between her legs and took hold of his cock, still wet from her mouth, and positioned it at her entrance.He lowered himself onto her, sliding inside. Sophie couldn't help the little grunt that came out of her at the shock of being invaded. But it was a delightful sensation, one that she'd denied herself for too long.Maybe Mellie had the right idea after all. Women want sex as much as men. To get fucked every night and get paid for it would be just heaven. Mellie had had over a thousand cocks inside her. That was amazing. That was suddenly Sophie's new fantasy. She wanted that for herself.She looked up into the face of the stranger above her. There was a freedom in not knowing his name or anything about him. She didn't have to pretend to orgasm, even though that cock pounding her might do the job anyway. She didn't have to like him or visit his family or cook him dinner. All she had to was spread her legs and let him fuck her. That was easy and fun.And the freedom went both ways. He was paying for this service. He didn't have to be embarrassed about asking for things. While most guys would never in a million years admit to a female they're interested in that they've been with a prostitute, John 1 and all the other johns could speak freely in front of the prostitute herself. That meant he could be honest about all the other fantasies he'd been having as well.Sophie studied his face as he drove himself in and out of her. It felt wonderful. Maybe too wonderful. She was getting close to climax. Was a whore supposed to orgasm? The guys probably liked it to happen, or at least to believe that it happened. But Sophie felt kind of shy about it.It was already surreal that she and Mellie were getting fucked side by side in the same hotel room. And it was even weirder that two total strangers were doing the deed. It was unbelievable that Sophie was on her first ever job as a working prostitute. She was coming to terms with all of that. But maybe it was unprofessional to come with a john.If she did come, which was starting to seem more and more inevitable, she didn't care if John 1 knew. He deserved to know. It would probably boost his ego and make this experience an even better bang for his bucks. It was a little weirder to think about John 2 being aware of it. He wasn't the one fucking her. It would be like somebody walking in on her masturbating. But Sophie could handle that, she thought. It was, however, incredibly embarrassing to think about Mellie knowing.The guys were strangers. She would never see them again. But Mellie was her best friend. It was too strange to think of her seeing Sophie in climax. And Mellie was a professional whore. Sophie didn't want to make a bad impression on her.But suddenly it was too late to even think about it as all her thoughts dissolved and the orgasm took her. She wrapped her legs around her john and tried to pull him in as deep as possible as she trembled beneath him.Somewhere in the back of her mind, she was aware that John 1 was also coming, pumping his seed into her. She had always avoided that in the past. Only one man had ever been allowed to fuck her without a condom, and to pop in her pussy. Her other three previous partners had been required to wear condoms. No man goo in her cunt, thank you very much.But today, she welcomed it. It fed her own ongoing ecstasy. His thick, pulsing cock and the warm wetness flowing into her pussy were the most erotic experience she'd ever had. The fact that she didn't even know this man's name made it even hotter that she was receiving his cum.But even that exquisite thought faded under the onslaught of pure joy that claimed her, body and soul. Sophie ceased to exist. There was only the orgasm. It took her through a scenic tour of Heaven, hitting all the highlights and wonders, then brought her back to Earth, and left her lightly sleeping.Slowly, she came back to herself. John 1 was still on top of her, still inside her, resting and recovering from his climax. Sophie looked over to the other bed, where Mellie was still getting fucked by John 2. It was a beautiful sight for the sheltered eyes of Sophie, who had never even watched a porn movie.Mellie's legs were wide open, cradling her john between them, blocking Sophie's view, so she couldn't actually see his cock entering her friend. She desperately wanted that sight, but it was still exciting to watch him thrusting against Mellie.Mellie was moaning convincingly, very professional in Sophie's opinion. And John 2 was panting and grunting as he fucked her. Her own john seemed to be dozing. so this was like a private, live sex show for Sophie's eyes only.She watched with her eyes wide and a broad grin on her face as John 2 made a final deep thrust and groaned as his whole body quivered in orgasm. Mellie had her head thrown back in a marvelous simulation of coming. Sophie wondered if it was maybe genuine after all. It was wonderful to be watching this with John 1's cock still buried deep within her.But all too soon, it was over. John 2 finished coming and John 1 woke up. Both men disengaged and stood up. Embarrassed to be naked in front of each other, they started pulling on their clothes. Sophie supposed she needed to rise and dress as well, but she was feeling too relaxed. And Mellie seemed to be in no hurry.Mellie came over to where Sophie was lying, climbed up on the bed, and suddenly climbed on top of her in a 69 position. What the hell was this?Sophie had never in her life really seen a pussy. She'd examined her own with the safe distance provided by a mirror, but that was it. Now Mellie's pussy was right above her face, shaved smooth, shiny with wetness, and the lips still slightly parted from the recent plowing by John 2's cock.It was not a sight she was really prepared for, and then Mellie sat down right on Sophie's head, pressing her used pussy hard against her face and grinding. Sophie had to breathe through her mouth when her nose slipped into friend's entrance.And then Mellie's tongue and at least two fingers were in Sophie's own pussy. She gasped to realize that her friend was scooping the cum out of Sophie's cunt and licking it all up. And a warm, salty flavor informed her that Mellie was pushing out her own deposit of semen onto Sophie's lips.She hadn't agreed to this. It hadn't even been discussed. She didn't mind the taste of cum. She liked giving blowjobs and making a guy come right on her tongue. But she wasn't sure she wanted to eat cum out of a pussy. That was going just a bit far for her first time in this job.But then Mellie was getting off her and pulling Sophie up to a sitting position. Mellie made a show of licking her face, cleaning off all the cum. It was oddly erotic to have her face licked, Sophie thought. She wouldn't mind having that on a regular basis. And now that she had experienced it, a girl's tongue and fingers in her cunt hadn't been bad at all. Whores did lesbian shows for their clients sometimes, didn't they? How many women had Mellie been with, Sophie wondered.Mellie opened her mouth to let the guys see their cum on her tongue, then smiled and swallowed it down. Happy and satisfied, the boys left the room and Sophie was alone with Mellie.“You did great,” Mellie said. “Thank you, thank you, thank you. You have no idea how much I appreciate you.” She went to the hotel desk drawer and pulled out the money the guys had given her.“I charge a thousand dollars for Bareback Full Service, Cum In Pussy, and another five hundred to eat a guy's cum out of a girl's pussy. Both guys paid the price, so here's your half. Fifteen hundred for an hour's work.”Sophie took the money slowly. She had done it. She had taken money for sex. That made her a whore for real and forever. She could never again look down on strippers or porn stars or even sluts. She had fucked for cash. There was no coming back from that. And she didn't regret it.“I'm sorry,” Mellie said, “but I have to throw you out. You can share a shower with me if you'd like, but we have to make it quick. I've got another client coming in about ten minutes and then two more in quick succession. I would really appreciate it if you'd go down to the pool for a while and maybe the bar or the coffee shop. You can even go home if you'd like. But I need the room."There's a shower in the pool locker room,” Sophie said, amused at her friend's dilemma. “And I am hungry. A margarita would taste pretty good right now. I can stay gone for a few hours. I'll have my phone with me. Call me when the coast is clear.”Sophie took a deep breath, committing herself, and added, “You can call me if you need another girl too. And not just for tonight.” Then she put on her revealing, but respectable bikini, and covered it with the slutty Daisy Dukes and half-tee. With a last look at Mellie, she left the room, hoping to be called back soon.by  Cybotic for LiteroticaDisclaimer: This is a fantasy. There is no magical Australian plant that prevents STDs.

Send us a Text Message.I'm sharing insights from my healing journey and the quest to get my groove back through solo travel and self-pleasure. I traveled to Nashville this week on my first solo trip as a single and boy did Nashville do me right. In this episode, I'm sharing 8 things that helped me feel hotter than ever while making my way through Nashville as a single. I also give you a sneak peak of my experience at the Stimulate Sexual Wellness Trade Show and Conference!Find out about Stimulate here: https://stimulatetheshow.com/Subscribe to my e-newsletter: https://she-explores-life.ck.page/e9760c390cAsk a question, Leave a Comment: https://www.speakpipe.com/LockerRoomTalkPodcast Use Special Code Explores30 for 30% Off at check out!:Thethruster.comboutiquevoila.comlaciershop.com Get 30% Off Sex Toys & Lube with code EXPLORES30 at thethruster.com: https://bit.ly/3Xsj5wYSupport the Show. Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@annettebenedetti Connect with usWe are on all the socials: TikTok: @ LockerRoomTalkPodcast LRT's Insta: @Lockerroomtalkandshots Annette's Insta: @BeingBenedetti SEL Inst: @SheExplores_Life LRT's FB: @LockerRoomTalkandShots SEL FB: @ SheExploresLife Annette's YouTube: Annette Benedetti Check Out More Sexy Content:She Explores Life Website: sheexploreslife.comCheers!

Grab those cowboy boots and pull on those sexy denim shorts because we are steppin' out for A Public Affair! Joel and David are heading back to 2005 and 2006 to revisit this iconic chapter in Jessica Simpson's career - and arguably, her best album to date! As the sun was setting on her high-profile marriage to Nick Lachey and the "Newlyweds" series; Our Jessica Ann is hitting a new stride! She bagged her first film role, playing the iconic Daisy Duke in "The Dukes of Hazzard" and released one of her highest-charting singles 'These Boots Were Made For Walking'. Little did we know then that the character would become the launch pad for so many commercial opportunities for savvy Jess, including her billion-dollar retail empire! "A Public Affair" was released the following year, with the title track grabbing headlines for all the best reasons. The music video and euphoric pop tune saw Jess step out for the ultimate girls night out with Christina Applegate, Christina Milian and Eva Longoria. Whether she was being real and vulnerable on 'I Belong To Me' or giving you an undeniable "slagbanger" in 'Fired Up', there's plenty to enjoy on this fun and varied album; which samples everything from Dead or Alive to Diana Ross and Fleetwood Mac! We're here for the full spectrum of it. Follow Right Back At Ya! https://www.instagram.com/rightbackpod/ https://twitter.com/rightbackpod https://www.facebook.com/rightbackpod Follow Joel https://www.instagram.com/dr_joelb/ https://twitter.com/DR_JoelB Follow David https://www.instagram.com/lovelimmy/ https://twitter.com/lovelimmy Email us rightbackpod@gmail.com

On Episode 6 we get tripped up on cantrips before Joshua David MG gives us a songwriting prompt that'll make you ask: Did they just write the songs of the summer??? If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠you can go to our Bandcamp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to pay-what-you-want to support us! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Challenge: "Did I just write the song of the summer???" ----------------- BUG'S SONG Title: Loud and Clear Lyrics: You're playin' DJ on our road trip and my ears are going numb It's taking every bit of patience not to mute it with my thumb maybe pretend that it malfunctioned and I'll fix it when we stop but then you say "this one's my favorite" and you crank the volume knob Why do you like this stuff, I haven't got a clue what made a middle class big city girl like only country tunes you don't square dance in your Daisy Dukes or line up in your boots and you you ain't ever seen the inside of a country town saloon I've tried to give it all a chance, I promise you I did but I can't tell when one song ends and when the next hit song begins twenty minutes in... lets just call it what it is every hit song of the summer sounds a little bit like this: a big bar crowd sing-a-long a four-chord kinda country song where the chorus always mentions beer and the title, the title hits loud and clear Its always so repetitive, they've got nothing to say every aspect is generic, every lyric feels cliché I respect the men and women and the instruments they play but the hacks that they are backing have put all their skills to waste cause the stars are all so similar, so handsome, could it be another well-connected white boy up and moved to Tennessee Has a network out in Nashville, plays a chord or two or three add a fourth and ride a horse and you can end up on TV singin' But did you ever think... [See website for remaining lyrics!] ----------------- MATT'S SONG Title: Comparing Yourself to a Sillhouette Lyrics: Amelia was born on a saturday night in the heat of july in the heart of america and while the city slept, her mother showed her the sky and speckles of starlight settled on her eyes and little Amelia Earhart knew one day she would fly No that's not what happened Can someone tell me why we obsessively mythologise real people, real lives like this Like no one truly exists unless they live between the lines of a fairy story someone writes? Is it not enough for someone just to have lived, you know? And to have lived extraordinarily? Amelia 'melia, please Come back to earth some time I'm dangling here by a wire And it doesn't feel like flying. Do you think jesus understood that it wasn't enough to be a good man? To be wise and patient and kind? Do you think he knew that in order for his message to outlive him he would have to be canonised, and to be canonised he would have to die before his time? Or was that narrative thrust upon him Against his will By a disciple who loved the message more than the man And who knew that humans don't trust humans We trust gods And so this all too human friend of his would have to Whether he wanted to or not Become a god Or be forgotten And here I am, trying to be the best version of me that I can Comparing myself to these silhouettes who In the way they're presented at least Didn't exist Thinking that because I don't have a narrative Because you couldn't project my story on the screen That somehow makes me less real And the thing is I don't think I'm accepting that I think i'm trying to turn myself into a story To see myself as I see them As only a silhouette

If you were Dominick Mysterio, who would you rather have as Mami: Rhea Ripley or Liv Morgan.? Plus, did the Blood & Guts main event delivery for AEW? What's next for Lashley, MVP, & Tamina? Stream now to listen to our hot takes! YouTube.com/@ondamarkwrestling Instagram @ondamarkwrestling

Marney Gellner and Mark Parrish join the Friday fun and talk about their golf picks, Sauce leads Fan Five

Marney Gellner and Mark Parrish join the Friday fun and talk about their golf picks, Sauce leads Fan Five

This week on the show, Justin talks about his experience working in a haunted strip club, and Christian endures an awkward and insulting encounter with a waitress in LA. Laura calls in with a lot to say about prostate exams and fecal transplants. Finally, new listener Sarah calls in to make a case for visiting Alaska in the winter. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Check out the latest in Realm merch. Grab a T- shirt for that next R.O.C meet Up!!! https://teespring.com/stores/realm-of...Use our Sideshow affiliate link! It helps support the REALM! http://sideshow.te8rfv.net/mVAgMagabyss.com is the official online partner of the Realm of Collectors. Visit agabyss.com today for all your Masterpiece and third party needs! $5.95 flat rate shipping, free shipping on orders over $150, price matching with other online retailers, and Agabucks! Same as cash rewards system! Make a purchase, earn points to use towards you next purchase! Visit agabyss.com for details!The Realm Of Collectors Podcast..Join the R.O.C fam as they discuss toy collecting and all things geeky.Join the Realm Of Collectors facebook group.Follow us on instagram @realmofcollectorswww.realmofcollectors.comMake sure to subscribe to all "The Cool Table Network" podcasts.Enter The Realm - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvdf...Nerd Rage Radio - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGKF...Huge shout out to http://tf-prototype.comandhttps://www.facebook.com/Third-party-...

Welcome to another hilarious installment of 99 Minutes! Amanda The Ginja Ninja joins us for this stretch of fun! We talk Dream Team jackets, French-rolled Daisy Dukes, more tales from the flea market, “The MoistenBeaver”, and wooden coasters: The Great Equalizer. Don't miss it! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theitlistpodcast/support

As most of you know, our Patreon audience has the INSIDE access to the KF Show. The year 2024 will be an important one for Patreon specifically and if you'd consider jumping up to the $5 level it would sure help. The $10 level will remain and we now have a brand new $20 level as well! All members who join at that level will receive a sticker swag pack in the mail, you'll be IMMEDIATELY entered in the monthly prize grab, and you'll receive a phone call from one (or all) of us to chat up whatever you want for 30 minutes! Thank you SO MUCH to those of you who have joined in for the extra content that is only for Patreon supporters. To get in on the action and support the show with a minor financial contribution just click the link below to sign up. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW ======================================== Presented with Holley - Back for 2024!  Phase 3 of Kibbe and Friends is officially here, and Holley is back for more fun, foolishness, and flying orange Chargers! Once again we're proud to be associated with the historic name that has made cars fast for years and years, and their innovations continue forward (as always)! The 2024 Holley LS Engine Giveaway is underway! Not only do you get a killer engine....but you get $5000 in cash as well to help offset the income tax due as well! Check out the specifics at https://www.holley.com/win/lsenginegiveaway and tell them we sent you! ======================================== K&F Show Summary: This time we're all in for something different. In light of the upcoming "The Fall Guy" movie releasing on May 3, 2024 we decided to do a deep dive on the original TV series and  a preview of the new movie. Even better, we were joined by our own Nathan Warren of Warren Customs as the guest co-host. We don't know anyone that loves Fall Guy trucks (and the TV series) more than Nathan. He even once stated that "it's like the Dukes of Hazzard, only better." The Movie: Our spies in Australia have already seen the movie and sure us that its good, and Ryan Gosling and Emily Blunt's promotions have been fantastic to watch! An original (replica) style Fall Guy truck appears in the movie, but the "new" GMC Sierra 1500 appears as the modern day equivalent. It looks to be an entertaining movie, and FINALLY one that will highlight the stunt performers that have always been hidden in the shadows in any Hollywood production. Stuntman Logan Holladay performed an 8.5 barrel-roll stunt for the movie that set a world record in doing it! Even better, Ryan Gosling and SNL's Mikey Day promoted the movie by dressing up as Beavis and Butthead and standing in front of the 2024 Fall Guy Truck. Classic Fall Guy Episode Review:  Season 3 - Episode 3 “Trauma” Written by Lou Shaw, and Michael Halperin Directed by Ted Lange Created by Glen A Larson Airdate: 9/28/1983 Fall Guy Show Summary: Colt Seavers (Lee Majors) hunts down a bad guy who has stolen a town's treasurers and hides the bad guy from the screaming townsfolk in the secret stash compartment of the truck. Unbeknownst to Colt (but knownst to us) the bad guy hides the key to the town's treasurers in the trucks' afore mentioned secret compartment.  That way when he got away later….he could just shoot the driver of the truck (Colt) and get his key back. Easy Peasy. Unfortunately, Colt's nephew Howie (Douglas Barr) was driving the truck on two wheels with the shows' blonde Daisy Duke equivalent (Jody, played by Heather Thomas). She survived but the nephew was nearly killed, leaving Colt and Heather Thomas right the wrongs.  Hijinks ensue, the catch the bad guy, we see one of the train derailed Knight Rider cars painted white, two more stunt trucks, and lots a jumps. Pretty tidy episode. 9 Nathan Warren Sasquatches. ======================================== See you soon. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW Kibbe, Corndog, and the Bern! National Parts Depot Presents: Bernie on the News! https://www.npdlink.com. The post K&F Show #294: The Fall Guy Spectacular with Nathan Warren; Movie Preview and Classic Episode Review! first appeared on The Muscle Car Place.

The Savage Dragon [vol 1] #2 (1992)Carrying on with the saga of The Savage Dragon, we pick up the Dragon in the Chicago sewers looking for an obese spider man (as opposed to Spider-Man or Spider-Ham). Dragon's been running ragged fighting crime and almost gets some companionship from his Daisy Dukes wearing neighbor gal. Unfortunately, Hellrazor and his cronies have taken over the mall, sat on ALL the chairs in the Brookstone and finished off the entirety of the bourbon chicken in the food court, leaving the Windy City paralyzed with fear. But as we've seen, Savage Dragon goes hard….but does he go TOO HARD?!?Also, we have an extended discussion about WrestleMania XL this past weekend. Jump ahead to 00:14:09 for the comic book talkPromo from DECONSTRUCTING COMICS (https://deconstructingcomics.com/)Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter (X) @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.comAlso, get hip to all of our episodes on YouTube in its own playlist! https://bit.ly/WorstCollectionEverYTPlease rate, review, subscribe and tell a friend!

This week's topic is "White Trash!" In this episode, Kelly and Ali tackle Cracker Barrel, Daisy Dukes, marrying an oil man and more! Both of their Hen House Open Mics are awful... some of the worst we've heard yet.

ITL Hour 3: Shohei Ohtani drama and Dameon Pierce to the Cowboys? ITL Lunch-Time Confessions, music confessions and Daisy Dukes. Wagner, Lidge, Dotel weigh in on Astros MLB best back end of the pen.

ITL Hour 1: Shaun Bijani & Brandon Scott in for Landry & Lopez discuss the NCAA Tournament, and all the craziness on a Friday.  Could Kalil Davis be the Blake Cashman for the Texans this season? Cal McNair is set to become the principal owner if the NFL owners agree to it today. ITL Hour 2: Should the Texans sign Xavien Howard after bringing in all of these other reclamation projects? Internet Going Nutz, new music brings beef? The Hits with Bijani and B Scott.  ITL Hour 3: Shohei Ohtani drama and Dameon Pierce to the Cowboys? ITL Lunch-Time Confessions, music confessions and Daisy Dukes. Wagner, Lidge, Dotel weigh in on Astros MLB best back end of the pen. ITL Hour 4: Around The NFL, No more hip drop tackle? Did the Texans get better this off-season? Shaun Bijani hijacks Slime-Off. Landry wins Slime-Off and more.

Remember Daisy Duke on “The Dukes of Hazard"? Anyone who grew up in the late '70s and early '80s does. It featured a beautiful young actress named Catherine Bach playing the part of Daisy Duke, who was most famous for her short-short cutoff jeans, curvaceous figure, and legs that went down to Mexico.Like millions of households every Friday night, Amy Lang and her family would gather to watch the show and, on one of those nights, Amy's father turned to her, pointed at the Daisy Duke on the TV, and said, "That's the ideal figure for a woman."Amy was 14, a petite adolescent, and the message was clear. You ain't it.Today, Amy is a former gym owner and weight-loss coach. She's back on the show to talk about her new book, "Thoughts Are Habits, Too: Master Your Triggers, Free Yourself from Diet Culture, and Rediscover Joyful Eating.” Amy's expertise and enthusiasm are helpful to anyone struggling with weight or helping people to establish better habits, like eating right and exercising. I know you'll enjoy our conversation.Online Links and Resources“Thoughts Are Habits, Too” book siteAmy Lang's Moxie Club for weight lossHer Happy & Healthy podcastMy new course to motivate men over 50 to get off the couch and into fitnessLife Priority Supplements -- Affiliate Discount  herePrime Fit Content – Engage the over-50 market

As most of you know, our Patreon audience has the INSIDE access to the KF Show. The year 2024 will be an important one for Patreon specifically and if you'd consider jumping up to the $5 level it would sure help. The $10 level will remain and we now have a brand new $20 level as well! All members who join at that level will receive a sticker swag pack in the mail, you'll be IMMEDIATELY entered in the monthly prize grab, and you'll receive a phone call from one (or all) of us to chat up whatever you want for 30 minutes! Thank you SO MUCH to those of you who have joined in for the extra content that is only for Patreon supporters. To get in on the action and support the show with a minor financial contribution just click the link below to sign up. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW ======================================== Presented with Holley - Back for 2024!  Phase 3 of Kibbe and Friends is officially here, and Holley is back for more fun, foolishness, and flying orange Chargers! Once again we're proud to be associated with the historic name that has made cars fast for years and years, and their innovations continue forward (as always)! Make sure that you visit Holley.com to place your speed parts orders – and THANK THEM for continuing on as the Title Spnonsor of the KF Show! ======================================== K&F Show Summary: Note: In honor of Valentine's Day 2024 we gave Bernie the keys to the show and told him to make a re-run episode! Listen in for a rundown of whatever Valentine's Day stuff that Bern came up with....which is probably super duper weird, but kind of adorable too. Following that is a re-broadcast of our review of "Cleetus Falls in Love" from KF Episode 252. Godspeed. -Kibbe and Corndog  Poor Cleetus makes the mistake of being #MeToo'd by Daisy Dukes, and his heart has to pay the price until she finally confesses to using her sexuality for personal gain. Poor Cleetus. But, love know no boundaries - and just like Cleetus we all have to take the high road and go on to date a bank teller anyway. This episode features Sheriff Little and is the second episode after the shift to the wide push bar General Lee. Also noted in this episode, no-one suffered from food poisoning and was stricken with vomiting and diarrhea for 4 hours straight. ======================================== See you soon. Join up via Patreon at patreon.com/KFSHOW Kibbe, Corndog, and the Bern! National Parts Depot Presents: Bernie on the News! https://www.npdlink.com. The post K&F Show #287: Bernie on the Valentine's Day News; “Love Week” 2024 Dukes Review: S4E12 “Cletus Falls In Love” first appeared on The Muscle Car Place.

This is a MUST LISTEN episode as Mike takes you through his personal journey in the fitness world and leaves you with life-changing advice that will change the way you approach your own fitness routine. ✅ WEBSITE: https://TheDolceDiet.com ✅ GET CERTIFIED! November 18 & 19, 2023 LEARN MORE: https://dolcedietshop.com/products/online-ddc-diet-certification-fitness-conference ✅ TEXT ME the word "PODCAST" to: +1 (732) 487-3445 ✅ WORK WITH MIKE! 1-on-1 Coaching Apply Here: https://form.jotform.com/233095432727963 ✅ TRAINER'S NETWORK Free Weekly Newsletter: Join 35,000 Members Here: https://start.thedolcediet.com/newsletter

Kelly and Hank talk football, daisy dukes, facelifts and more!! Thanks for supporting our sponsors! Living Proof – Visit www.LivingProof.com/KELLY and use code KELLY to get 15% off your first purchase Earth Breeze – Subscribe to Earth Breeze and save 40% at https://EarthBreeze.com/MORNINGAFTER Care Of – For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to https://TakeCareOf.com and enter code morningafter50 Nutrafol – Get $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you use MORNINGAFTER at https://nutrafol.com Honeylove - Get 20% OFF @honeylove by going to https://www.honeylove.com/Morning #honeyLovepod