Your Encore Life

As we are coming to the end of 2020 and look forward to 2021, we are going to offer encore episodes about the importance of and steps in writing a life plan.  2020 certainly didn’t turn out like the vision we may have had for it, but we have a lot to look forward to.  This past year has dealt a harsh blow to many plans  we may have had.  Some I know have been able to reboot their plans and move forward with an alternative direction, either changing course entirely or just navigating around the original planned course.  As 2021 approaches, we can look forward to a vaccine for Covid-19 and the return to some of the activities that we have been held back from doing as a result of this pandemic. This is the perfect time to do what I believe is one of the most important steps to avoiding a life of regret by writing down a life plan, and we will spend the next 3 episodes replaying the 3 episodes that covered this nearly a year ago.  This also gives me time to take a bit of a break to revisit my life plan and make adjustments based on where I am now and this season of life to chart the course of where I want to be.  So don’t miss a single episode of this series.  Remember, just listening to teaching and information will get you nowhere unless you act on it, so here we go for part 3 of the series. Episode 48 we talked about beginning with the end in mind by writing down what legacy you want to leave.  The action step was to write what people you designated would say when they eulogize you or after. Episode 49 we talked about creating categories in your life plan, or what the book “Living Forward” refers to as life accounts.  This includes areas like Spiritual, Intellectual, Physical, Spouse, Children, Co-worker, etc. and writing a purpose statement for each, a statement of vision for where you want to be for your envisioned future when this category is at its best, a statement of current reality, and if applicable an inspiring quote or scripture. Today is where we form an action plan, or make specific commitments for each life account that will eventually bridge the gap between our current reality and our envisioned future of where we need to be.  It is important to write you commitments as SMART goals. Specific - What exactly are you committing to?  Non-negotiable Measurable - Quantify the result Actionable - Must start with an action verb such as run, walk, complete, quit… Realistic - Must be attainable, but best if it stretches you Time-Bound - Must have a time period that you will commit to, such as frequency, how many, …  Goals must have  completed by or due date Make a list of action items for each one of your life categories, or accounts. Since a life plan is a living, breathing document, make your specific commitment action items incremental while still stretching yourself.  An example may be: Physical Life Account: A goal you may have for 2020 would be to run a 5K by the first day of summer.  You can create a specific commitment to go out and walk/run 4 days a week for 30 minutes.  That may mean you just walk four doors down the street in the first 2 weeks, 1/2 block after 4 weeks, incrementally increasing until 45 minutes isn’t enough, so increase your commitment to 45 minutes, then 60 minutes. Specific Commitment:  Action commitment to do something to get you from your current reality and your envisioned future. Goals: dictionary.com defines a goal as: the result or achievement toward which effort is directed; aim; end. Goals will need to be written in the SMART format as well, with the time bound being a specific date to accomplish it.  We will talk more about goals in next week in episode 13. Action Item: Write specific commitments, action statements for each of the life categories or accounts that you have that move you from your current reality incrementally to your envisioned future for each. I will be pausing this podcast during the holidays to re-evaluate my life plan and be in thought and prayer for what Your Encore Life will sound like when we return. My focus will be on connecting with others with a focus on asking for God’s wisdom on how He will use me to add value to others and ultimately connect people with Him. All episodes will remain available to go back and listen to again or for the first time.   Stay tuned and subscribed, and continue to contact me at craig@craigcoilecoaching.com or on my Craig Coile Coaching Facebook page! Thank you for being a loyal listener, and may God bless you. Resources: Vision Board, Dr. Jack Canfield “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy Contact Craig

As we are coming to the end of 2020 and look forward to 2021, we are going to offer encore episodes about the importance of and steps in writing a life plan.  2020 certainly didn’t turn out like the vision we may have had for it, but we have a lot to look forward to.  This past year has dealt a harsh blow to many plans we may have had.  Some I know have been able to reboot their plans and move forward with an alternative direction, either changing course entirely or just navigating around the original planned course.  As 2021 approaches, we can look forward to a vaccine for Covid-19 and the return to some of the activities that we have been held back from doing as a result of this pandemic.   This is the perfect time to do what I believe is one of the most important steps to avoiding a life of regret by writing down a life plan, and we will spend the next 3 episodes replaying the 3 episodes that covered this nearly a year ago.  This also gives me time to take a bit of a break to revisit my life plan and make adjustments based on where I am now and this season of life to chart the course of where I want to be.  So don’t miss a single episode of this series.  Remember, just listening to teaching and information will get you nowhere unless you act on it, so here we go for part 2 of this series.   Much of the information I am going to share is based on the book, “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy as I have mentioned in previous episodes.  You can find the reference and link to the book in the show notes.   Last week we talked about beginning your life plan with the end in mind, and your action step was to write down what legacy you hope to leave behind once you are gone by reflecting on what you would want people to say about you at your funeral and after.   Today we are going to get down to the specific about several categories, or what the book “Living Forward” call Life Accounts.  Examples of categories, or life accounts that you would want to include are:   Spiritual Intellectual Physical Marital Parental Social Financial Vocational Avocational   This list is not exhaustive and you can have different names for the categories that may be more specific to you, for instance “spouse” or you spouses name, your children’s names.  You can also add categories such as grandchildren, travel, exercise, etc.  I recommend you list them in order of priority, but that it up to you.  They do recommend putting categories that are related directly to you near the top, such as spiritual, intellectual, and physical.  Although this may feel selfish, it goes along with the thought that you can’t take care of and add value to others until you can take care of yourself.   Hyatt and Harkavy suggest there are four considerations when making your list of life accounts:   Life Accounts are unique to you. Life Accounts can be names whatever you want. Life Accounts are interrelated. Life Accounts will change over time, as we discussed last week.   You will need to get specific for each account.  Each one will need to have the following sections:   Purpose Statement:  What is your reason for being in this area, our role? Envisioned Future: What does this area of your life look like when it is at it’s best? Inspiring Quote or Scripture. Current Reality:  Keep it simple and realistic.  Write it as bulleted statements. Specific Commitments:  Similar to goals, what steps do you need to take to get from the current reality to your envisioned future.  These steps will change as you accomplish them and move to more advanced steps.   Here is an example of my physical life account from my life plan:   Physical: My physical purpose is to maintain my body as God’s temple through proper nutrition, exercise, and following recommended checkups.   I am at a very ideal weight for me, and I have the energy to accomplish my daily activities and desires.  I am exercising daily and loving the activities that are giving me great physical benefits.  I have cut my medications to a minimum because of my healthy way of life.   I am very conscious about my health and diet, yet often make poor choices, particularly on the nutritional side. I track steps and exercise with an Apple Watch I currently do 35-40 pushups every morning I don’t have a regiment in place for getting enough exercise and strength building. I have cut my BP and Cholesterol medication in half and monitor results   Specific Commitments: I will get to and maintain a weight of 175 – 180. I will do cardio and strength building exercises a minimum of 4 times per week. I will read “The Daniel Plan” and make 4 beneficial eating habit changes as a result. I will drink at least 8 – 8 ounce servings of water daily.   Inspirational Quote: Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you received from God?  1 Corinthians 6:19   We will get down to more detail about how to write your specific commitments and follow through with making progress with your life plan next week as we conclude the series.   Action Step:  Write down your list of between 6 - 12 life categories or accounts.  Write your purpose statement for each, your envisioned future of where you want to be, an inspiring quote or scripture for some of them, and the current reality of where you are now.  Refer back to the show notes for an example of how I have written one of my accounts, but write it in a way that is most meaningful for you.

As we are coming to the end of 2020 and look forward to 2021, we are going to offer encore episodes about the importance of and steps in writing a life plan.  2020 certainly didn’t turn out like the vision we may have had for it, but we have a lot to look forward to.  This past year has dealt a harsh blow for many plans  we may have had.  Some I know have been able to reboot their plans and move forward with an alternative direction, either changing course entirely or just navigating around the original planned course.  As 2021 approaches, we can look forward to a vaccine for Covid-19 and the return to some of the activities that we have been held back from doing as a result of this pandemic.   This is the perfect time to do what I believe is one of the most important steps to avoiding a life of regret by writing down a life plan, and we will spend the next 3 episodes replaying the 3 episodes that covered this nearly a year ago.  This also gives me time to take a bit of a break to revisit my life plan and make adjustments based on where I am now and this season of life to chart the course of where I want to be.  So don’t miss a single episode of this series.  Remember, just listening to teaching and information will get you nowhere unless you act on it, so here we go for part 1 of this series.   A life plan is a short written document that is written by you for you.  The life plan we will be discussing starts with the end in mind, how do you want to be remembered, the legacy you leave.  The second part details your life priorities, the who’s and what’s that are most important to you.  The third part details specific actions you will make to reach where you want to be.  This is where you can plug in your goals.   A life plan is a living document that needs to be reviewed often and can be modified as you move forward and/or into different seasons of life.   In this episode we will talk about beginning with the end in mind.  Think about how you would want each of these relationships to eulogize you and talk about you once you were gone from this earth.  These are just examples but this list is not exhaustive: God (well done good and faithful servant) Spouse Children Grandchildren Closest Friends Casual Acquaintances Those you worked with, your colleagues Those who were in organizations you were part of Teammates Clients you served Your Church   The example I will provide is from my co-workers from the school district I just retired from:   “Those that I worked with will recall how I always made them feel valued and appreciated.  They will talk about how I always made clear to all my faith, and that I was an example by being His hands and feet in serving those in need.  They will recall my desire for them to grow into leaders that focused on adding value to the lives of others.  They will talk about my honesty and integrity in all things that I did.”   In the book “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy, they state that writing your eulogy as part of your life plan will “engage both the head and the heart”.  The book also states that if you can imagine you are attending your own funeral, what conversations would you hear:   What would those closest to your life? What stories would they tell one another? Would those stories make them laugh, cry, sigh, or all three? How would they summarize what your life meant to them?   Leaving a legacy is inevitable. Leaving a legacy that you want is not, and requires planning and intention.   Hyatt and Harkavy go on to write:   “Our legacy comprises the spiritual, intellectual, relational, vocational, and social capital we pass on. It’s the sum total of the beliefs you embrace, the values you live by, the love you express, and the service you render to others.”   What do you want your legacy to look like with each of the relationships we talked about earlier?   Action item:  Write out a list of relationships similar to the ones we discussed and write compelling legacy statements that say how you would want each relationship to remember you.   Next week we will talk about listing our priorities and charting the course to live our best encore life by avoiding drifting and charting a course of action for our lives.   Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12 | NIV |   In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. Proverbs 16:9 | NIV |   There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. Ecclesiastes 3:1 | NIV   I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing. 2 Timothy 4:7-8 | NIV  References: “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 47 of “Your Encore Life”. When thinking about this topic of the importance of connecting with others, it came to me that one of the most popular series I have done was about Finding Joy in episodes 16 - 23, and one of those episodes has great information about the importance of making connections and relationships. This episode will be an encore episode from the series “Finding Lasting Joy: Relationships. The main source I used for this series is the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora. In a blog post by John Maxwell titled “Five Steps for Connecting with Others, John says “Connection is a critical part of leadership, because you can’t lead if no one will follow. You have to connect with others in order to be a leader. With that in mind, I want to share the following five steps for connecting with anyone. It can be a someone new, someone familiar, or someone you’re attempting to re-connect with after time. No matter who the other person is, if you’ll follow these five steps, you’ll be certain to create a genuine connection with them. Step One: Set aside your agenda—if you want to connect with other people, you must make their agenda your priority in that moment. Genuine connection isn’t about making sure people understand you; it’s about making sure you understand other people. Clear your mind of your own worries, fears, ambitions, and plans, in order to focus on what the other person has to say. Step Two: Ask curious questions—this goes hand in hand with my first point, because the practical step for getting out of your own head is to ask questions that help you get into the head of someone else. Curious questions have a layering effect; they build on one another and help drive the conversation to new and interesting places. Curious questions also help the other person know you’re engaged with them and want to keep the connection going. Step Three: Lean into the conversation—this is the mid-point of connection, and it’s where self-discipline is most important. Leaning into a conversation is NOT the same as taking over a conversation. Leaning in does not mean shifting the rest of the conversation to you and your interests. Leaning in means increasing your curiosity and adding in thoughts that spur the connection deeper. It’s renewing your interest in your connection with the other person. Step Four: Make a memorable moment— memorable moments don’t need to be manufactured, but they do need to be sought. A connection becomes memorable when both parties walk away with something positive to hold onto. Making a memorable moment doesn’t require a lot, but it does require authenticity on your part. You can make a memorable moment by zeroing in on a significant lesson you learned, or a statement that impacted you. It could be a shared laugh, a moment of grief, or a deep sense of community with the other person. Step Five: Keep the connection alive—while it’s hard to create a connection, keeping one alive is considerably easier. It’s an intentional decision to keep the other person with you in some way. You might exchange encouraging texts or send one another helpful emails from time to time. Maybe it’s just the courtesy of remembering that person’s name so you can greet them and quickly reconnect the next time you see them. Do what you need to do to keep the spark alive, so you can build on it in the future.” An article by Northwestern Medicine titled: 5 Benefits of Healthy Relationships they state that “As humans, the relationships we form with other people are vital to our mental and emotional wellbeing, and really, our survival. Humans have an inherent desire to be close to other people. To connect and build relationships. While a man stranded on an island, talking to a volleyball (you remember the movie!) isn’t necessarily “healthy,” his compulsion for company is. That’s because the fact of the matter is, healthy relationships (romantic relationships, friendships, familial relationships -- they all count!) can help make for a healthier overall life. Everyone is unique and has their own needs and desires when it comes to relationships, handling stress and living a healthy, meaningful life. If you’re the type of person who enjoys being alone, that’s okay too, but attempting to make a couple close relationships could mean noticeable benefits to your mental and physical health. Sometimes having at least one good friend (or trusted co-worker, therapist or counselor) to help walk you through issues like social anxiety or depression can end up being more than worth it. It might be difficult, but it also might be exactly what you need. Even just having one or two strong, healthy relationships in your life can have a positive effect on health.” In the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora, he starts out the discussion on relationships with a quote by Charles Spurgeon who said “Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong. It’s knowing the difference between right and almost right”. He says that is the consideration we are faced with in considering our relationships and deciding how much time we should dedicate to which relationships.  Spadafora goes on to say that “poorly managed and neglected relationships are far and away the most common reason for self-inflicted pain in peoples’ lives. I can remember people saying “quality over quantity” when trying to reason with not spending time with family and those closest to you.  The fact is that time itself is the most valuable gift you can give anyone.  And while you are spending that time, it is important to be present, really present with the person or people with the time you do spend.  Quality and quantity are both important to having a deep relationship. Being in the same room while working on your computer or answering emails or being on social media on your phone is not quality time or being present. The book states that “if we had a crystal clear picture of what we want our most important relationships to look like twenty years from now, we might have more motivation to be more strategic about how we treat those closest to us. Or, conversely, if we had a sense of what life twenty years from now with obliterated relationships would be like, we’d be motivated to make some positive changes right now.”  Think about your relationships you have outside of family.  What are they motivated by? Do you think it could be selfish ambition or self promotion? How can relationships you have bring true joy by being motivated to serve and add value to others?  Spadafora says to “be brutally honest with yourself about the heart issues (ego, pride, fear, insecurity, greed) that are deteriorating your relationships. Self-deception about what really drives your thinking and interpersonal interactions will hold you back. Your relationships and life will never be all you want if you can’t get real with yourself. Self-authenticity is an unequivocal prerequisite to growth and joy. Philippians 2:5-8 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus Who, being in very nature[a] God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature[b] of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross! One of the most important elements of cultivating healthy relationships is the area of communication.  We will talk more about this in future episodes, but I believe the key to effective communication is the lost art of listening.  Truly listening and being present in the situation is a huge gift to others.  Listening isn’t just waiting for your turn to talk or finishing others thoughts for them. When it does come time to speak, choose your words carefully.  Spadafora states that you can ruin a relationship “with wrong word choice, inappropriate tone, bad timing, or offensive body language. Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Action Item: Spend time thinking about a relationship that is very important to you and consider these questions: Do I take the real time and quality time needed to have a deep relationship? Do I listen intently and make sure the person knows what they say is important? Is my motivation in this relationship to serve and add value? In a blog post by Rick Warren titled: “Life Is All About Relationships” Warren says “ Nobody ever asks for things in the final moments of life. They always ask for people, because eventually everybody learns that life is all about relationships. Why not learn that sooner? It sure would relieve a lot of stress. Life is not about achievements. It’s not about accomplishments. Life is about relationships.” Resources: Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Five Steps for Connecting With Others: John Maxwell 5 Benefits of Healthy Relationships: Northwestern Medicine Life is All About Relationships: Rick Warren Bible Gateway Contact Craig

This is Craig Coile, and thank you for joining me for this episode of Your Encore Life.  Today in episode 46 we are going to continue our discussion from last time on the importance of being in connection. This can be particularly important if you are retired or nearing retirement.  We typically have some connection by default if we have a regular job working with others.  But if you are retired or are a work at home entrepreneur, you need to be intentional about being connected with others.  Regardless of whether you are working or not, we need to be intentional about being in connection with others that is healthy for us.  Today we are going to talk about different types of friendships and how to make sure they are beneficial rather than harmful to our well being.   For the purposes of our discussion today, we are going to talk about 3 categories of friends.  Think about an outside circle with the category of casual friends, a smaller circle inside of that with the category of close friends, and a small inner circle with the category of core friends. The outer circle could consist of people you know casually from work, church, or neighbors. You may spend time with them occasionally mostly due to the nature of your environment. You may enjoy talking with them but only on a casual basis.  The next category are close friends. They are people you spend much more time with than casual friends. You intentionally make it a point to get together from time to time. They may be part of a group you are in such as common hobby interest or a small group bible study. You likely are comfortable talking to them about more personal things, much more so than casual friends. The next category is the small center of your circle that we are going to refer to as your core friends. This is a very small group that you trust with your most personal of discussions. These are the people you call and depend on when you need wise counsel, as accountability partners, and who you could call at 3AM and they would answer if it was necessary.   Let’s look at this from the standpoint of the Bible and those that Jesus invested in the most.  He had a group of 120 that He trained..casual. He had 12 Disciples that He invested a great deal of time with…close. He had Peter, James, and John that He trusted and took with Him to be alone with…core.   The bottom line is that we are wired to be in community - we are better together.   Pastor Rick Warren talks about what to look for and what to avoid in his podcast titled “Daily Hope”.  He gives an illustration about someone standing on a stage and reaching down to grab the hand of another person.  He asks if it is easier for the person on the stage to pull the other person up or for the other person to pull the one on the stage down?  We must take steps and be intentional in spending time with others that can pull us up when we are down and we can do the same for them and avoid people who can continuously pull us down.  He talked about what he refers to as missionary dating and how most often the one that feels they can change the person for the better ends up falling to their level if the relationship continues over time.  This can happen not only in dating, but in friendships.   Here are 6 characteristics that Rick Warren says are in people we should avoid becoming good friends with:   Argumentative: Some just love to argue and will do so about anything.  Often there is no convincing them otherwise even if their argument is unreasonable.  Proverbs 20:3 says 3 It is to one’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel. Gossip: Someone who loves sharing information about others without solving the problem or having a solution. Proverbs 20:19 says A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much. Flatterer: someone who gives false praise. Proverbs 20:5 says The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out. Proverbs 29:5 says Those who flatter their neighbors are spreading nets for their feet. Psalms 109:5 says They repay me evil for good, and hatred for my friendship. Uncontrolled temper. Proverbs 22:24-25 says Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, 25 or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.  You should even avoid filling your head by listening to people with hot tempers such as talk radio and 24 hour news shows. Someone who steals or shoplifts.  Proverbs 1:13-15 says we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder; 14 cast lots with us; we will all share the loot”— 15 my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths; Believers who ignore what God says about sexual sin.   How many of these characteristics do you see in your friends and acquaintances? Remember that it is easier them to pull you down than for you to pull them up.  I would suggest that you continue to love and pray for your friends that you need to pull away from but continue to show them that you care.  You need to guard your heart and be the example for others that you know you can be.   Contact Craig Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope: Forming Healthy Relationships Parts 1-3 Bible Verses about Community

This is Craig Coile, and thank you for joining me today. Do you feel you need a reboot?  That is what we are doing to talk about today on episode 45 of Your Encore Life. I have been going through a process developed by Teresa McCloy called “The Realife Process” with my coach Mark Ross.  I had gone through several weeks of the process but was not really connecting with the process and felt I was making little progress.  When I had a few days to myself in the mountains trying to get back on track, I realized that even though the focus I had was something I wanted to do and will do, there were more important things that I needed to focus on first.  So I rebooted my focus and all the sudden the process became much clearer and more motivating for me.  The process wasn’t the problem, my focus was the problem.  I recently listened to another podcast called “The Begin Again Leadership Podcast” with Winston Faircloth.  He had taken a break from publishing his podcast for a period of time and when he returned, he said he needed a new start, a begin again moment which he referred to as refirement.  That really resonated with me that perhaps I needed a period of time away to have a refirement of my own.  I was also talking to someone recently that I had worked with on a life plan, or vision board a couple years ago. Even though the idea of a life plan is to revisit and revise at least quarterly or sooner if needed, they felt the plan had become stale to them and expressed a desire to start over from scratch. 2020 has been a confusing year at best.  When I did a podcast at the end of 2019 talking about 20/20 vision for 2020, we never could have foreseen what it has become.  Depending on your circumstances, the events of 2020 may have had little impact on your life or it could have derailed everything you were planning.  October is right around the corner and it is a good time to look ahead and plan for 2021. We may see 2021 as a big question mark at this point, but don’t let yourself become complacent and lose sight of your dreams.  Now more than ever we need to have a dream to look forward to, goals to set, and a vision for how we are going to get where we need to be. It can start with being still and listening to the messages you are getting.  That is what happened to me.  For a period of time last month, I was getting messages from sermons, podcasts, things I read, and people I talked to about the importance of being connected with others, about being in community.  People who know me a little would think I was a very social person who thrived on being with others,  People who know me the best know that I can be introverted.  I realized that it is OK to be both and that I can value time alone or just with my wife and family, but that I also need desperately to be in community with others. That has been a challenge in 2020 with COVID-19, but there are ways that you can connect with others through technology.  This will pass eventually and we need to prepare ourselves to connect again with others face to face when it does.  It just isn’t the same using technology as it is being with others in person. So the podcast episodes that will follow for a bit we will be talking about the importance of friends, connecting to others and being in community.  We will also talk about preparing for 2021 with a vision for what what we want to accomplish and a plan for how to get there. Hebrews 10:24-25  24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. 1 Peter 4:8-11  8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. 9 Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. 10 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. 11 If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen. Phillippians 2:3-8  3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7 rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross!  Contact Craig Bible Verses about Community Begin Again Leadership Podcast with Winston Faircloth The Greatest Commandment - Bible Gateway

Welcome to episode 44 of your Encore Life.  Today the title of this special podcast episode is “The One Next Right Thing We Must Do”, tagging onto last weeks episode 43.  This will be a brief episode that is the most important message I have ever shared.  It is that we all need to come together and pray as one to God for revival, a great awakening.  You all see the headlines, and there seems little to be joyful about. If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, you know that God has got this, He has a plan. Ask Him to make you a part of that plan.  As we see headlines of a pandemic, divisiveness, anger, rioting, hatred, and destruction, you can take a peek behind the curtain of the headlines and see that God is moving in powerful ways. Churches have stepped out from behind their walls and connected with many through online services and acts of love during this difficult time that have connected with people that have stepped away from their faith or are new to it. God has historically moved powerfully after dark periods through His people when they come together in prayer.   John Ramstead of “The Eternal Leadership” podcast that I have referenced before, is leading the charge for people of faith to come together for 40 days of prayer. It begins Monday, September 14th, but it is never too late to join in.  You can go to eternalleadership.com/prayer, which I have included a link to in the show notes, or you can text Prayer40 to 44222 to get the information and sign up.  They will provide you with a daily prayer focus and video that will take 5 minutes of your time for 40 days. If you choose not to sign up, God doesn’t require you to do that to hear your prayers. Reach out to Him and ask Him to heal our land, to give our leaders wisdom, to heal hearts, and to teach us how to live out the greatest commandment that Jesus gave us as I mentioned last week. Matthew 22: 37-40:  37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[c] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[d] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Trust God to move through our unity, faith, and prayers. Contact Craig Eternal Leadership 40 Day Prayer Challenge The Greatest Commandment - Bible Gateway

Welcome to episode 43 of your Encore Life.  Today the title of the podcast is “What’s Next”.  This will be a brief episode about some things that I have observed and heard others asking, including myself.   When we began 2020 many of us may have had a fairly clear sense of what was next for us and where we might be headed.  Some of you may have been able to realize those things, but I know many who have not because of circumstances that were out of their control.  One thing I am certain of is that none of us could have foreseen 2020 for what it has been.  COVID 19 has limited our access to people, to events, to travel, to school, to church, and the list goes on.  The political climate and the unrest in our nation has generated fear, and there is nothing more powerful to divide people than fear. All of this can leave us feeling powerless, not having control over our own circumstances.  For many in the listening audience of this podcast who are at or near retirement and wondering what’s next, you could be feeling like you have past the point in your life where you can accomplish what you want, that you are too old to make a difference.   Let’s go back to what I talked about in very early episodes of this podcast.  The idea of E + R = O.  Remember that stands for events + our response to the events = outcome.  We have not had control over much of what we have been presented with in 2020, but remember that we always have control over how we respond, and how we respond will most definitely have some measure of influence over the outcome.   Let’s start with the sense that you have past the point in your life where you can accomplish what you want or it is too late to start something new.  Author and Podcaster Dan Miller from the 48 Days fame recently wrote about that and talked about a website you could go to where you type in your age and get a list of people’s accomplishments that occurred later in life.  I have included a link to the Museum of Conceptual Art in the show notes where you can do this.  He included some of the following examples:   At age 99, Teiichi Igarashi climbed Mt. Fuji. At age 90, Chagall became the first living artist to be exhibited at the Louvre museum. At age 83, Great grandmother Joyce Patrick learned to read and write. At age 70, Benjamin Franklin helped draft the Declaration of Independence. At age 62, J.R.R. Tolkien published the first volume of his fantasy series, Lord of the Rings. At age 50, William Piper, who built the Piper Cub airplane, learned to fly and never considered building his own plane until much later. At age 46, Golfer Jack Nicklaus became the oldest man ever to win the Masters.   When I typed my age of 60 in I got the following examples:   Playwright and essayist George Bernard Shaw completed a play, "Heartbreak House," regarded by some as his masterpiece. Italian sculptor, painter, playwright, draftsman and architect Gian Lorenzo Bernini began designing churches. Ann Roberts retired from 30 years of driving an 18-wheeler, changed jobs to tax preparer and also sales rep for a tractor/bush hog company. She square dances evenings and weekends. She is a grandmother of 4 and is still working. Frieda Birnbaum became the oldest woman in the U.S. to give birth to twins. If you are listening to this podcast or reading this blog on my web page, then God is not finished with you yet.  Continue to dream and take steps, however small, to realize your dream, to add value to others and leave a positive legacy to your life.   I have also been thinking a lot about the greatest commandment and how I can honor that commandment, which I know I fall far short on.  It is Matthew 22: 37-40:  37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[c] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[d] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”   What can that look like for us and how can we start moving toward following that commandment?  I have enjoyed listening to a podcast by Emily P. Freeman recently titled: “The Next Right Thing”.  It is a beautifully done podcast and I have included a link to it in the show notes.  We may have difficulty seeing the big picture of what we will do and where we will go during this difficult time, but just ask yourself “What is my next right thing”? If you ask yourself that question consistently and follow through, your small next right things will become your path to where you need to be.  Could your next right thing include things like:   Calling or visiting someone you have been thinking about lately Writing a letter to someone you know is lonely Taking a walk around the block, or to the end of the driveway to begin the process of getting healthier Spending more time reading the Bible Starting a morning routine of devotion and quiet time   And as you thing about what your next right this is, do as Emily P. Freeman states at the end of each podcast, “Do Your Next Right Thing in Love”.   Contact Craig Museum of Conceptual Art - What people my age have accomplished? The Next Right Thing - Emily P. Freeman 48 Days: Dan Miller The Greatest Commandment - Bible Gateway

Welcome to episode 42 of Your Encore Life. In this episode I will continue our discussion from the last few weeks on self assessments and how they can help at any stage of life, especially in your encore.  I will talk a bit about my personal Cliftonstrengths results and a bit about the Enneagram, which I took recently through my coach Mark Ross as a basis for going through the Real Life Process to help me manage my priorities more effectively. I have included links to learn more about the Enneagram and the Reallife Process, as well as a link to Mark Ross’s business “Next Thing Group” and the Gallup CliftonStrengths Assessment web page. Let’s start with my top 5 talents from the CliftonStrengths assessment.  I will share these with you not so you can learn more about me, but so you can get an idea of what this assessment is like and how it can help you learn more about yourself. Don’t try to learn what I am telling you here.  There is a wealth of information on the websites that I have provided links to, just listen to this 1000 foot view so you can get a picture of what these assessments can tell you about yourself. My top 5 talents are: Belief Responsibility Connectedness Relator Developer Stick with me as I read the descriptions of each of these talents….. Each of the 34 talents has a description of what characteristics are present in mature and raw form.  If you recognize that one or some of the raw characteristics describes you, you can focus on how to move that characteristic from its raw form to a more mature and productive form.  The mature and raw characteristics of my top 5 are….. You can see the wealth of very highly researched information you can gather that will give you much clearer insights about yourself. Now let me give you my Enneagram type and see how there is a relationship between it and my top 5 talents.  My core style is 2, with my neighboring auxiliary style of 1.  In stressful situations is 8.  So what does all that tell me? My core style of 2 is described as the following…. My preferred wing style of 1 is described as the following… What my core style of 2 may find easy to do is…… What my core style of 2 may find difficult to do is….. I hope this walk through my assessments has been helpful for you to see how they can help you to learn more about yourself and help to guide you to be your most and best productive self, to live in your “Zone of Genius”, which we will discuss in a later episode, and to live your best encore life. Notice how I said help to guide you, not define you. 1 Peter 4:10-11:  Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. 11 If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen. Soar With Your Strengths, Donald O. Clifton and Paula Nelson Gallup Clifton Strengths Assessment  Wagner Enneagram Personality Style Scales Reallife Process: Teresa McCloy Next Thing Group: Mark Ross Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 41 of Your Encore Life. In this episode we will be talking specifically about the CliftonStrengths Assessment and why it has value for those of us entering into or already in our Encore Life.  As you may recall episodes 39 and 40 were both discussing the value of maximizing your strengths, focusing on strengths and building them rather than putting an emphasis on your weaknesses and trying to overcome them.  We also talked a little about how to minimize your weaknesses by maximizing strengths or by methods discussed in an article by Brent O’ Bannon referenced in episode 40 titled “To Manage Your Weakness, PLUG your LEAK”.  Let’s start by reviewing that: L: Loath - What activity do you absolutely hate to do? E: Escape - What activity do you avoid at all costs? A: Average - What activity is a weakness that no matter how much you try, you are only average at it? K: Kink - What activity no matter how much you improve leaves a kink in your stomach when doing it? P: Plan - consciously use one or more of your strengths to boost your weakness. L: Leave - Decrease or eliminate if possible the need to perform that activity. U: Unite - Find someone to perform that activity that is a weakness in your place. G: Grow - If you have to continue this activity, find a way to improve such as training in the basics, then let it go. The book lists five characteristics of a strength and how best to develop them.  Here we go: Listen for Yearnings:  What have you seen or heard that makes you think “I want to do that”?  What makes your heart flutter or sing?  This cannot be confused with what they term as “misyearnings”, which can be driven by a desire for power, glamour, and excitement and can derail us from our true strengths path. Watch for Satisfactions:  “Satisfactions are those experiences where the emotional and psychic rewards are great”.  You really enjoy doing them. Watch for Rapid Learning:  If you are learning something best by jumping in and you feel like you have always known how to do something. Slow and laborious learning is a sign that this may not be an area of strength. Glimpses of Excellence:  Often evident in a finite activity or performance, which isn’t necessarily impressive but a trained eye or you sense a moment where you shine brightly. Total Performance of Excellence: Total performance excellence is defined in the book as not being “a glimpse, but the complete extension of an activity.  It doesn’t happen occasionally, but each time the activity is performed.  It is not subject to circumstances but transcends them. To become exceptional: Pick a strength and pursue it. Claim it out of fantasy and into action. Do more of it Enjoy it Again I have included links to the articles and book mentioned in this episode as well as a link to access the CliftonStrengths assessment, which we will talk more specifics about now. The global strengths movement started six decades ago when Don Clifton posed a simple question: "What would happen if we studied what was right with people versus what's wrong with people?" More than 90% of Fortune 500 companies have used CliftonStrengths to bring the power of strengths-based development to their workplace culture. Every year, more organizations of all sizes give leaders and their teams the chance to become great at what they're naturally good at. The test itself is an hour-long online assessment, where you'll see 177 paired statements and choose which one best describes you. The assessment measures your talents -- your natural patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving -- and categorizes them into the 34 CliftonStrengths themes. Your customized CliftonStrengths reports and guides help you chart your course to accomplish great things using the true north of what you naturally do best. You will get a customized dashboard on the Gallup Access platform to find resources and tools that will help you learn how to do more of what you naturally do best. Find a Coach to help unlock your potential and succeed in every facet of life. I would encourage you to look over the Gallup CliftonStrengths website that I have included a link to in the show notes to learn about the extensive research that has gone into making this such a powerful assessment tool. I want to emphasize the word I used “tool”.  There are many assessments out there that measure all sorts of individual traits and characteristics, some of them excellent like the CliftonStrengths assessment, and some of them mostly useless and poorly researched.  You should never let any assessment define who you are and paint you into a box.  They can be extremely useful in gaining a better understanding of your strengths, values, and personality traits that make you unique.  The better we understand ourselves and what makes us tick, the better we are prepared to be our best selves. So why would it be important to know our strengths as we enter into our encore life?  Often times we are painted into a box by our careers which can make it difficult to make the best utilization of our strengths.  It is when our passion and strengths meet that we are most successful and most satisfied.  Once you have the freedom of choice with what you do with your time to pursue your calling, your passion, what makes your heart sing, is often in what we call your encore life. So I encourage you if you haven’t already done so, take the time to discover what the CliftonStrengths assessment can tell you about what talents you have been gifted with so you can maximize those talents and turn them into strengths. I would love to have the opportunity to talk with you individually about this process.  I encourage you to reach out to me if you have any questions about the process or are thinking about what benefit discussing your assessment once you have taken it with a trained coach such as myself could give you.  Brian will tell you at the end of the episode how to contact me. 1 Peter 4:10 As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: Romans 12:6-8 ESV / 12 helpful votes  Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness. Soar With Your Strengths, Donald O. Clifton and Paula Nelson To Manage Your Weaknesses, Plug The Leaks, Brent O’ Bannon Gallup Clifton Strengths Assessment  Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 40 of Your Encore Life.  Today we will be expanding on the introduction to strengths that I began in our last episode. We will define what strengths are, talk about the five characteristics of strengths, and talk about an article by Brent O’ Bannon about managing your weaknesses. I am pulling some of this information from the book “Soar With Your Strengths” by the father of the Cliftonstrengths assessment and author of several strengths based books Donald O. Clifton, and Paula Nelson. The book states that the definition of strengths is based on two different levels. “On a rudimentary level, strengths are the things you do well.”  Things such as goaltending in soccer, marketing, selling, developing others, speaking…you get the idea.  A more sophisticated definition is on another level and includes things like “patterns of behavior, thoughts, and feelings that produce high degree of satisfaction and pride; generates both psychic and/or financial reward; and presents measurable progress toward excellence.”  In other words, physical forms of strength, and the second type that have more to do with “ego, persistence, dedication, courage, pride, perfection, and competition.”  The book lists five characteristics of a strength and how best to develop them.  Here we go: Listen for Yearnings:  What have you seen or heard that makes you think “I want to do that”?  What makes your heart flutter or sing?  This cannot be confused with what they term as “misyearnings”, which can be driven by a desire for power, glamour, and excitement and can derail us from our true strengths path. Watch for Satisfactions:  “Satisfactions are those experiences where the emotional and psychic rewards are great”.  You really enjoy doing them. Watch for Rapid Learning:  If you are learning something best by jumping in and you feel like you have always known how to do something. Slow and laborious learning is a sign that this may not be an area of strength. Glimpses of Excellence:  Often evident in a finite activity or performance, which isn’t necessarily impressive but a trained eye or you sense a moment where you shine brightly. Total Performance of Excellence: Total performance excellence is defined in the book as not being “a glimpse, but the complete extension of an activity.  It doesn’t happen occasionally, but each time the activity is performed.  It is not subject to circumstances but transcends them.   To become exceptional: Pick a strength and pursue it. Claim it out of fantasy and into action. Do more of it Enjoy it Let’s talk briefly about minimizing our weaknesses.  I have referenced an article by Gallup Coach Brent O’Bannon titled “To Manage Your Weaknesses, Plug Your Leaks”.   He states that “a major weakness is when you are not good at an activity, don’t feel passion for that activity, though it’s important to your career success”.  A “minor weakness is sometimes called a learned behavior that we are average to good at, while not enjoying or feeling passion for this activity, which is not a major part of our job or career success”.  This article uses the acronym LEAK to identify your weaknesses and PLUG to minimize the weakness, hence the name of the article “Plug the Leak”.  Here are the acronym meanings: L: Loath - What activity do you absolutely hate to do? E: Escape - What activity do you avoid at all costs? A: Average - What activity is a weakness that no matter how much you try, you are only average at it? K: Kink - What activity no matter how much you improve leaves a kink in your stomach when doing it? P: Plan - consciously use one or more of your strengths to boost your weakness. L: Leave - Decrease or eliminate if possible the need to perform that activity. U: Unite - Find someone to perform that activity that is a weakness in your place. G: Grow - If you have to continue this activity, find a way to improve such as training in the basics, then let it go. Again I have included links to the articles and book mentioned in this episode as well as a link to access the CliftonStrengths assessment. We will continue our discussion about strengths and more about the CliftonStrengths assessment on our next episode.  In the mean time, remember David writes in Psalm 139:14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. You were given your strengths for a reason. Focus on them and be grateful for them.  Don’t beat you head against a wall focusing on your weaknesses, but rather learn to manage and minimize them. Soar With Your Strengths, Donald O. Clifton and Paula Nelson To Manage Your Weaknesses, Plug The Leaks, Brent O’ Bannon Gallup Clifton Strengths Assessment  Contact Craig

The Animal School: A Fable by George Reavis Once upon a time, the animals decided they must do something heroic to meet the problems of a “new world” so they organized a school. They had adopted an activity curriculum consisting of running, climbing, swimming and flying. To make it easier to administer the curriculum, all the animals took all the subjects.The duck was excellent in swimming. In fact, better than his instructor. But he made only passing grades in flying and was very poor in running. Since he was slow in running, he had to stay after school and also drop swimming in order to practice running. This was kept up until his webbed feet were badly worn and he was only average in swimming. But average was acceptable in school so nobody worried about that, except the duck. The rabbit started at the top of the class in running but had a nervous breakdown because of so much makeup work in swimming. The squirrel was excellent in climbing until he developed frustration in the flying class where his teacher made him start from the ground up instead of the treetop down. He also developed a “Charlie horse” from overexertion and then got a C in climbing and D in running. The eagle was a problem child and was disciplined severely. In the climbing class, he beat all the others to the top of the tree but insisted on using his own way to get there. At the end of the year, an abnormal eel that could swim exceedingly well and also run, climb and fly a little had the highest average and was valedictorian. The prairie dogs stayed out of school and fought the tax levy because the administration would not add digging and burrowing to the curriculum. They apprenticed their children to a badger and later joined the groundhogs and gophers to start a successful private school. Welcome to episode 39 of Your Encore Life. Does this fable have a moral? What is the lesson you take from the fable? Let the ducks swim.  Let the rabbits run.  Let the eagles fly.  We don’t want a school of average ducks. Testing students…Spend a great deal of time remediating weaknesses.  Students get frustrated working most on what they struggle the most with, and after 9 months of that, we send them to summer school to focus primarily on their weakness.  I saw the same thing as a leader of an organization, where we had many individuals with tremendous talents that would shine when they were utilizing those talents or strengths, but during evaluations we would point out areas of improvement often relating to area that could be considered weaknesses and had them focus on that. Play to your strengths.  If you don’t use your talents, eventually, you lose your talents. I am not suggesting that we don’t teach important curriculum in schools to students who don’t have that area of curriculum as a strength.  I am suggesting that we don’t put so much emphasis on those areas and allow that to impact talent from becoming a student’s or employees strength.  If you build on your strengths enough, your weaknesses become irrelevant.  There is a great temptation to fix ourselves or others by investing time to improve on our areas of opportunities or weaknesses.  Instead, focus on how your strengths can get you to where you need to go. One of the single most powerful ways for individuals and organizations to maximize performance, satisfaction, and to reach significance is to focus on talents of individuals and refine them into strengths. Ephesians 2:10 English Standard Version (ESV) 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.   Psalm 139:14 English Standard Version (ESV) 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.[a] Wonderful are your works;     my soul knows it very well.   The Animal School: A Fable by George Reavis Gallup Clifton Strengths Assessment  Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 38 of Your Encore Life.  As promised in our last episode, I am going to review my life plan last updated in January of 2020.  I am going to be brutally honest about what I have and haven’t moved on.  If you need to find out more about creating a life plan, listen to episodes 10, 11, and 12 where i explain the steps and include links to resources in the show notes.   This is not about me.  I want to communicate that we all come up with plans that may or may not be realized and that is OK.  Situations and seasons change.  I’m quite sure many of our listeners had made plans back in January or set new years resolutions that weren’t realized, much of which may be a result of being blindsided by a pandemic that put the world back on it’s heals and continues to impact almost everything.  What is important is that we never, ever stop dreaming, stop looking forward, stop learning, stop planning, stop having goals to strive for. In reviewing my life plan after 6 months, I’ll set new timeframes for those things I won’t be able to meet in the timeframe I had said.  I’ll likely put a couple things I said I would do on hold, and I may have some new ideas that I want to strive for…so let’s get started.   In reviewing my life plan and trying to figure out where I need to do better, it boils down to using my time wisely.  I have asked my coach Mark Ross to assist me with this.  I know I need to set aside time for each thing that i hope to accomplish.  One of the hardest things about leaving the structure of a day to day job and beginning to live your encore life is creating a new time structure.  I don’t mean that I need to be rigid and designate required office time,  That is not what I want my encore life to look like.  What I do want is to eliminate wasted time doing things that have no value to myself, my family, or don’t add value to others.   I have included a link to Bible Reasons and 25 scriptures that deal with time management.  This resource states:  We should pray for God to remove procrastination and idleness from our lives. We should seek to do God’s will daily.  Continually meditate on Scripture and allow the Lord to direct your life.  A couple of the scriptures from this resource are:   Ephesians 5:15-17 So, then, be careful how you live. Do not be unwise but wise, making the best use of your time because the times are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.   Colossians 4:5 Behave wisely toward outsiders, making the best use of your time.   Psalm 90:12 Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.     So what about you?  Do or did you have dreams, goals, plans that you have given up on or just put aside.  Your action plan is to go back to your written goals, life plans, vision boards, or whatever you used and revive the plans that are important, re-evaluate those that may not be valid or important any longer because of a new season you are in.  If you don’t have any written life plan, goals, or vision-purpose-mission statement I encourage you to begin that process.  There are many resources available to help you with the process including previous episodes of this podcast.   We all need to have a purpose we are looking to serve and dreams we want to fulfill.  During difficult and unprecedented times like these, we need to focus on moving forward, for this season will close, and just like the farmer who must plant seeds to look forward to the harvest, we need to be ready.  I will be moving forward by adjusting my life plan to be more relevant to where I am now, and working on time management to make the most of the precious time I do have. Bible Reasons: Scriptures on Time Management Core 52: Mark Moore Contact Craig

Believe in people Value people Unconditionally love people   “We all have a choice what we put before us and what we put behind us”.  Put behind you devaluing people. Focus on valuing people.  The core issue to the situation we are in now is that we don’t value people.  We lack respect, honor, appreciation for others. We are all God’s creation. God has a plan and purpose for all of His creation….God also gives us the choice to seek and find that purpose or to disregard it and Him.   Treat others as you would like to be treated.  This rule is in every culture and every religion.   “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere”:  ML King   Put behind you selfish values that help you and not others, put before you good solid values.   Put behind us blaming, put before us listening   If we were to sit and listen to one another, we would find that despite our differences, we have more in common than we realize.   The difference between leadership during hard times in the past and today that leaders would ultimately put the people before the party and cross the aisle for the good of the country and the people.  Today I feel most leaders are looking more after their own selfish interests rather than the interest of the people. The selfish interests of some has resulted in celebrating others failures, even if it is at the expense of what is best for the country and the people.   Put behind us our reactions and put before us our refections.  There are lessons for all of us and we can all get better from these hard things if we take time to reflect and always put valuing others at the core of our reflection.   I am coming up on my one year anniversary for retirement.  My wife just surpassed the one year mark since her retirement.  As we talked about the importance of reflection previously I have also been reflecting about what this year has been like.  The good, the hard, the unexpected, and my response.  This also provided the opportunity to see where I have grown, and what I need to focus on more to be where I want to be, or more importantly, where God wants me to be.   One of the most helpful pieces of advise I got about this retirement life, or encore life was from my coach Mark Ross.  He told me from experience that I need to be able to give myself some time to figure out how to spend my time, and that is still a work in progress.   I will be discussing how this is reflected in my life plan and what adjustments I need to make as I review the plan in our next episode.   The John Maxwell Leadership Podcast: “Adding Value to Others” Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 36 of Your Encore Life.  This has been such a great series so far as our guest host Mark Ross has discussed “What’s Next? It’s a Process”. 1. Reflecting on Early Interests: Episode 33 2. Finding Your Direction: Episode 34 3. Experimenting with Possibilities: Last weeks episode 35 Today Mark will be concluding this series as he discusses Making Adjustments and Looking Ahead. I want to thank Mark Ross for allowing us to hear him share his experiences and expertise, and clearly defining for us what this podcast is all about.  I have included links to learn more about Mark and his coaching business, “Next Thing Group”.       Mark A. Ross, RLA, MBA, CPLC, ACC Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement of the developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation. Mark has enjoyed being married for over 34 years to Jeannie from Jackson Mississippi and is the proud father of two grown daughters. He is active in his local church, is a native Houstonian, an artist, an avid walker, follows professional surfing, and loves pretty much anything that is process oriented. Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 35 of Your Encore Life.  What fantastic value Mark Ross has provided as guest host during episode 33 and 34, and I couldn’t be more excited about this episode of the series where the theme has been “What’s Next? It’s a Process”.   1. Reflecting on Early Interests: Episode 33 2. Finding Your Direction: Last weeks episode 34 3. Experimenting with Possibilities: This weeks episode 35   Make sure you join us again next week as Mark conclude this series talking about Making Adjustments and Looking Ahead.     Mark A. Ross, RLA, MBA, CPLC, ACC Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement of the developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation. Mark has enjoyed being married for over 34 years to Jeannie from Jackson Mississippi and is the proud father of two grown daughters. He is active in his local church, is a native Houstonian, an artist, an avid walker, follows professional surfing, and loves pretty much anything that is process oriented. Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 34 of Your Encore Life.  After last week’s great episode with guest host  Mark Ross, we look forward to the continuation of this series. Today he will be talking about finding your direction. The theme of these episodes are “What’s Next? It’s a Process”.   1. Reflecting on Early Interests: Last weeks episode 33 2. Finding Your Direction: This weeks episode 34   Following episodes will discuss:   3. Experimenting with Possibilities 4. Making Adjustments and Looking Ahead.     Mark A. Ross, RLA, MBA, CPLC, ACC Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement of the developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation. Mark has enjoyed being married for over 34 years to Jeannie from Jackson Mississippi and is the proud father of two grown daughters. He is active in his local church, is a native Houstonian, an artist, an avid walker, follows professional surfing, and loves pretty much anything that is process oriented. Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 33 of Your Encore Life.  We have a very special treat for you in this episode and the next few.  Mark Ross, my coach, peer, and friend will be your guest host.  As you may remember from and interview I did with Mark in episodes 5, 6, and 7, he is what I consider one of the top resources for planning and living your encore life.  The theme of these episodes are “What’s Next? It’s a Process”, with today and the weeks ahead covering the topics: Reflecting on Early Interests: Today’s episode Following episodes will discuss: 2. Finding Your Direction 3. Experimenting with Possibilities 4. Making Adjustments and Looking Ahead. Mark A. Ross, RLA, MBA, CPLC, ACC Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement of the developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation. Mark has enjoyed being married for over 34 years to Jeannie from Jackson Mississippi and is the proud father of two grown daughters. He is active in his local church, is a native Houstonian, an artist, an avid walker, follows professional surfing, and loves pretty much anything that is process oriented. I have included Mark’s bio and how he can be contacted as well as resources he spoke about in the show notes. And now, here’s Mark Ross: Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners Contact Craig

Pastor Al Squitieri’s life journey had many twists and turns as he began his law enforcement career that spanned 25 years until the point of becoming the lead pastor.  In episode 30 we heard about the beginning of his career with a sheriff’s department up until the point at which he retired from that career. He spoke of the highs and lows, and some of the fear and excitement that came once he had decided it was time to retire. In episode 31 last week we heard about his journey from the point of his retirement from law enforcement to his volunteer time as a full time men’s pastor for a large church and ultimately to his current position as a lead pastor of a healthy growing church.  You heard his struggles and his passions as he continued his discussion about his encore life. This week in the final episode of this series, Pastor Al talks about the vision of what his church and his life might look like, and how the Covid19 pandemic has impacted that vision. Pastor Al's Bio includes: 25 year retired Deputy SWAT, Narcotics, Field training and street crimes. Raised in New York, one of ten children Married 35 years, married high school sweetheart, three grown children Lead pastor, NLCC Recovery Pastor, Men's Pastor and then Lead Pastor Camp pastor and camp Director Resources: New Life Christian Church Website New Life Christian Church on FaceBook Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Pastor Al Squitieri’s life journey had many twists and turns as he began his law enforcement career that spanned 25 years until the point of becoming the lead pastor.  Last week we heard about the beginning of his career with a sheriff’s department up until the point at which he retired from that career. He spoke of the highs and lows, and some of the fear and excitement that came once he had decided it was time to retire. In this episode we will continue the journey as we hear Pastor Al talk about the point of his retirement from law enforcement to his volunteer time as a full time men’s pastor for a large church and ultimately to his current position as a lead pastor of a healthy growing church.  You will hear his struggles and his passions as he continues his discussion about his encore life. 25 year retired Deputy SWAT, Narcotics, Field training and street crimes. Raised in New York, one of ten children Married 35 years, married high school sweetheart, three grown children Lead pastor, NLCC Recovery Pastor, Men's Pastor and then Lead Pastor Camp pastor and camp Director Resources: New Life Christian Church Website New Life Christian Church on FaceBook Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Today for episode 30 we have a gentleman that I was hoping to be able to interview since I first started thinking about doing a podcast.  I met Al Squitieri back in 2008 at our church where he had begun serving as the men’s ministry pastor.  From the very beginning it was clear that Pastor Al was as genuine as anyone you could possible know.  His passion for Jesus was evident as was his love for people and life.  Let me tell you a little from his bio: 25 year retired Deputy SWAT, Narcotics, Field training and street crimes. Raised in New York, one of ten children Married 35 years, married high school sweetheart, three grown children Lead pastor, NLCC Recovery Pastor, Men's Pastor and then Lead Pastor Camp pastor and camp Director Resources: New Life Christian Church Website New Life Christian Church on FaceBook Bible Gateway Contact Craig

In this final episode of this series, we will be having an open discussion as a group.  You have heard 3 different couples talk about their future or current retirement and their hopes for living their encore life.  In this open discussion between the eight of us, you will hear some of this: Group:  Spend time with family, planning, changed plans, timeframes changed as far as long range planning, God’s plan not our plans, Study the Word, God will give you a purpose every day.  Fear of the unknown….What if?  God is in control.  Reflect on events in your life and see how God’s plan has unfolded.  God speaks to you through His Word. Ask yourself “What can I do for God to build His kingdom. Action Item:  Listen to or read the resources provided in the show notes from Billy Graham and John Piper about how God speaks to us. Take time intentionally to spend time in God’s Word, asking Him to speak to you and giving you ears to hear what He has to say to you. Tune in next week as we have an interview with a gentleman that has experienced his encore life after a long career in law enforcement. Resources: Billy Graham Answers: How Does God Speak to Us Today? John Piper: Does God Verbally Speak to Me? Roger Whitney: Rock Your Retirement Planning for Retirement: AARP 48 Days Resources: Dan Miller Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Due to this unprecedented pandemic all of us are experiencing 2020 very differently from what our 2020 vision may have been.  Many have had their careers, retirements, travel plans, and just day to day living disrupted that may cause us to lose our vision for what we want in our encore life, or even wonder if we will ever get there. It is OK and quite normal to experience some levels of fear over the unknown (episode 24), grief over loss of loved ones, loss of health, loss of jobs or careers, and loss of what may have been plans and dreams disrupted. I recently listened to a special Easter message by Rick Warren titled “Expecting a Resurrection When Life Falls Apart”. I found his explanation of the normal emotions people go through starting with fear, then grief, then ultimately transforming to joy, relating it through the experiences of Jesus’s disciples and how we will experience this many times through our life to be extremely insightful. We must have hope to get through the hard things, and how we respond to these emotions will determine how we move through these emotions to a point of having hope again for the joy that we look forward to once we move through major disruptions and tragedies that we are going to face in life. I encourage everyone to listen to this message by Rick Warren. In this episode we talk with Fred and Becky, both who retired within the last few years from a lengthy career with the same school system that my wife and I recently retired from.  Becky retired twice from the system, while Fred spent some time in the department of corrections as an educator before moving to a public school system.  You will also get to meet my wife Kelli as she discusses our retirement and encore lives from her perspective. Topics that were discussed in this episode include: Find new identity/purpose.  Selling house/downsizing/lifestyle transition to affordable desirable.  Find purpose to help and do more for others.  More reach out/be the Church. Roadblocks have been caring for parents. Caring for Grandchildren. Action Item:  Your action item for this week is a repeat of the last two weeks which is to check out the resources that I have provided or others that you know of and plan your next step to get you closer to where you need to be to live your encore life.  If you have done this in the previous 2 weeks, then plan what your 2nd or 3rd steps may need to be. Isaiah 61:3  To those who have sorrow in Zion I will give them a crown of beauty instead of ashes. I will give them the oil of joy instead of sorrow, and a spirit of praise instead of a spirit of no hope. Then they will be called oaks that are right with God, planted by the Lord, that He may be honored. Please check out the show notes for resources that I have included during this entire series Resources: Expecting a Resurrection When Life Falls Apart: Rick Warren Roger Whitney: Rock Your Retirement Planning for Retirement: AARP 48 Days Resources: Dan Miller Bible Gateway Contact Craig

For the next few episodes we will be playing and discussing an open conversation that 3 other couples along with my wife and I had while getting together in our North Carolina homes.  The discussion was around the difficulties and joys of retirement and what each of the individuals and couples hopes and dreams are for in their encore lives.  This week we feature Bill and Sharon.  Bill was forced into retirement along with many others by a large utility company by using insurance benefits to leverage cutting the workforce.  Sharon was offered a package that she couldn’t refuse to retire early from a national travel and insurance company. Listen how preparation enabled them to retire.  Listen how they describe the stress, success, and excitement for what still lies ahead in their encore life. Bill and Sharon: Action Item: Look at the resources that I have provided for this series or other resources you know of regarding preparation for retirement and take one step you know you must take to get closer to living your best encore life. Next week we will play the conversation from another couple that both retired after lengthy careers in the last few years from the same school system my wife and I spent over 30 years with. Resources: Roger Whitney: Rock Your Retirement 48 Days Resources: Dan Miller Bible Gateway Contact Craig

I hope that you have been able to take something from episodes 24 and 25 and respond in such a way that during this time of uncertainty you have been able to spend time thinking about what this makes possible and how can I respond in uncertain times to move forward, to learn a new appreciation for some of the simpler things in life.  It is encouraging to hear how churches have looked outside of their walls to reach people.  God is on the move. If you didn’t listen to those 2 episodes I encourage you to go back to them at some point after you have listed to this episode.  And if you did but didn’t do the action items, here they are from last week:  (1) Write out by hand a note of thanks or encouragement to someone that has added value to you.  I’ll bet whoever you choose to write that note to really needs to hear the words you write this week. (2) Do what you can to support local small businesses.  They are suffering from this and adjusting the way they do business, such as focusing on take out and delivery and offering online substitutes, such as fitness centers. For the next few episodes we will be playing and discussing an open conversation that 3 other couples along with my wife and I had while getting together in our North Carolina homes.  The discussion was around the difficulties and joys of retirement and what each of the individuals and couples hopes and dreams are for in their encore lives.  In this first episode, we will hear from Tom and Diane.  Tom is a longtime successful business man in the construction industry who is seeking an exit plan but struggling to define what that looks like.  Diane recently retired from a successful 30 plus year career in the health care industry. Did you hear the frustrations of not having a defined exit plan from a business and the struggles of the already retired spouse.  Did you take note of the changes in the voices as they move from the frustrations they go through to the anticipation of what is to come by living their encore life. Tom doesn’t want to walk away from his God given talents, he wants to use them once he is free from the business by serving others.  Diane is finding ways to make her retirement valuable through helping her family, through finding new hobbies and interests, and through being in community with others while she waits for Tom to retire so they can enjoy their encore lives together. Tom & Diane: Action Item:  If you are in a position where you know you need to move toward retirement but can’t put together an actionable plan, similar to Tom, I have included a couple resources that I encourage you to check out and take one step to get you closer to where you know you need to be. Next week we will play the conversation from another couple that both ended up retiring earlier than anticipated and how they adapted to an early retirement to live their encore lives. Resources: Roger Whitney: Rock Your Retirement 48 Days Resources: Dan Miller Bible Gateway Contact Craig

The COVID 19, or Coronavirus pandemic has led to what seems like an avalanche of events and change that continues to evolve hour by hour, none of which we have control over.  We discussed the formula E+R=O in episode 7. Go back and listen to that episode if you want to hear specifically about E+R=O.  We don’t have control over the current pandemic or necessarily the actions that our leaders are are taking to limit the spread.  We don’t have control as individuals over the fall of the stock market as panic selling has taken place.  We don’t even have control over whether we purchase toilet paper or not.  What we do have control over is our response to these events. There is power in our response. What I have seen as many respond to this is an outpouring of compassion.  I hear stories of many people who have offered to serve others in this difficult time by helping watch other’s children, picking up groceries for neighbors who are unable to get out or at risk.  There was a story about a teacher who was handwriting notes to her students to encourage them while they are out of school.  What a cool idea. Think about how it makes you feel when you get a handwritten note of thanks or encouragement.  It is great to get an email or text note from others, but it is something special to get a handwritten note. I recall after my mother passed away finding the notes from many years that she received and kept close by.  When I was nearing my last days in my office prior to my retirement, I found 26 hand written notes of thanks and encouragement from a school administrator that he had written me over the 32 years of my career. I had literally received hundreds of kind emails from others I worked with and appreciated them tremendously, but those hand written notes were very special and I reached out to the gentleman and told him how much they meant to me over my career.  There was a story of a man who couldn’t visit his mother in the facility she was in so he went to the window and played the guitar for her. Harbor Freight donated their inventory of masks to the health care industry to protect them.  What stories of compassion have you seen related to the events of this pandemic?  What could be your story?  How can a response you have to this event add value to someone else? We are experiencing challenges on many fronts that are resulting in creative ways to work and live.  Many small businesses are getting hit hard by directives designed to keep people from being exposed. What opportunities might be opened up or explored as a result?  Many are finding new business opportunities by providing online services such as gyms and fitness centers. I heard of a pizza restaurant and brewery that went beyond going carry or delivery only by making pizza kits to sell and advertising them as one way to provide an opportunity to entertain and educate kids that are out of school.  They provided the kits and instructions for families to put together the ingredients and cook the pizzas at home.  I have heard of breweries and distilleries producing and selling much needed hand sanitizer to make up for the loss in sales of their other products.  These are all examples of taking a very difficult event that has come quickly and responding in compassionate, creative ways that has and will continue to soften the blow of this world crisis and ultimately will lead to a more positive outcome than if the response was to throw your hands up in the air and do nothing. I believe our responses to this event has led many people and organizations to think about what this situation can make possible.  Churches are expanding outside of the walls of the building and finding very effective and creative ways to reach not only their members, but others outside of the church by providing  many online opportunities to worship beyond just recording their services for viewing on the internet.  We hear about “being the Church” by serving people and the community. This could lead to many more people being exposed to God’s word and ultimately lead people to Christ. I heard of a church in our area that had toilet paper that you could get from them for no charge if you were in need.  Sounds simple, but that is being the church. Schools have been forced to ramp up online offerings, and many businesses have ramped up work at home programs. These responses, this “what does this make possible” thinking, I believe will ultimately lead to long term benefits as we change the way we do things.  Think about what a move, even a small one, to more work at home opportunities would bring. Think about the impact on traffic, the environment, and saved time on commutes could mean to a healthier world. Think about what more online opportunities for education could mean for teacher shortages and overcrowded schools throughout this nation.  Think about the possibilities as we learn to engage with others during times of isolation. Think about what it could mean to someone you know if they received a handwritten note of encouragement from you. Ask yourself what this time of uncertainty makes possible. As Zig Zigler would say, change your “stinkin thinkin”, and take this difficult situation to think about what this makes possible.  Dare to dream, then move. Action Item: (1) Write out by hand a note of thanks or encouragement to someone that has added value to you.  I’ll bet whoever you choose to write that note to really needs to hear the words you write this week. (2) Do what you can to support local small businesses.  They are suffering from this and adjusting the way they do business, such as focusing on take out and delivery and offering online substitutes, such as fitness centers. Romans 12:2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 [Full Chapter] Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. Romans 1:11-12 English Standard Version (ESV) 11 For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you— 12 that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine. Matthew 6:27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Next week we will have an open discussion with 4 couples who are or have transitioned to retirement and talking about what their encore life could or does look like. Resources: 48 Days Resources: Dan Miller Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Google says fear can be defined as, “an unpleasant, often strong emotion caused by expectation or awareness of danger.” Zig Ziglar has said that there is an acrostic for FEAR which is False Evidence Appearing Real. It is not my intention to make this podcast another discussion about COVID19, or CoronaVirus.  Nobody can deny that as the world has turned its attention to this, it has at best dramatically disrupted normal.  Education, business, finances, travel, entertainment, and just our ability to purchase necessities like toilet paper and hand soap have been impacted.  We have seen it bring out the best in people and organizations, as well as the worst. From companies like Zoom and Spectrum offering free access to enable internet based instruction, to fist fights in stores over getting access to toilet paper. A local store had to move hand sanitizer to wipe cart handles down from the front to customer service because it was being hoarded  And has been sadly the norm, it has created divisiveness based on whether people feel there is an over-reaction or an under-reaction. We have seen the financial markets suffering huge losses, with wild swings from the stock market.  On a recent Dave Ramsey Show he quoted Art Laffer, one of the leading economists in the world as saying “People don’t make good decisions when they are drunk, and they don’t make good decisions when they are panicked.”  He goes on to talk about the loss of value in Southwest Airlines and the cruise line industry.  He makes the point that even though they have lost huge percentages of value in the stock market based on panic selling, people are “fools” to believe they have really lost that much actual value and that they won’t bounce back from this once the frenzy settles. A recent post by friend and pastor Al Squitieri said: “So many polarizing posts about fear during this mind boggling situation. Ridicule for being afraid and ridicule for marginalizing it. As a Deputy, narcotic detective and Swat operator,  I learned very quickly how to appreciate her. As odd as this sounds, don’t be afraid of fear. It was fear of the situation that caused me to properly assess and choose the best course of action, for all parties involved. Succumbing to the fear was as much of a mistake as dismissing it. There is a balance we must find to operate effectively, with an eye on success as the end result. Stay calm, weigh the dangers, respect the fear and keep moving!” In an article by the Center for Life Change titled “Healthy Fear Vs. Unhealthy Rear, they say the difference between healthy fear and unhealthy fear in two simple lists. The author writes that healthy fear is stimulated by real threatening danger and then disappears when that danger is no longer present. Being faced with what could be a matter of life or death, healthy fear encourages or requires us to take action. Taking action out of healthy fear rarely results in any feelings of shame. Good reason stands to have been fearful, and the fear-based action had clear motives: to get out of the way of danger. Unhealthy fear, on the other hand, according to the author, is stimulated by perceived or imagined danger- which usually isn’t dangerous at all. While healthy fear recedes after it serves its purpose, unhealthy fear tends to carry on because there is no real end goal. Since there is no clear directive from unhealthy fear, rather than inspiring us to take action it causes paralysis. Neither defending ourselves nor confronting the fear can lead to shameful feelings. Lastly, since there is no real definition of the fear, there aren’t any clear motives for taking action on it. Unhealthy fear is illogical, oftentimes irrational, and mostly without use. Through recovery, we learn to face our fears- both healthy and unhealthy. We feel equipped to do so because of our trust and faith in God, or the Higher Power of our understanding. It is impossible to be in faith and fear at the same time. If we replace our unhealthy fears with unending faith, we will be amazed by how quickly our fears will fade. Woodrow Wilson once said, "Fear God and you need not be afraid of anyone else.” So what does it mean to fear God? We are to love Him and take great pleasure in serving and obeying Him, to marvel at His glory and majesty. If we are to believe that God is ultimately in control and wants what is best for us, then there is nothing left to truly fear but God In an article titled “Healthy Vs. Unhealthy Fear” by Mercy Multiplied, they say that “yes, fear is unpleasant, but the emotion of fear is not a bad thing! In fact, God gave us fear as an innate form of protection. So why do we hear so many things about fear and the negative effects it has in our lives? When fear is distorted from its intended purpose, to protect us from dangerous situations, fear becomes unhealthy. This distortion leaves us with a problem: distinguishing healthy vs unhealthy fear. Unhealthy fear develops when we allow the emotion of fear to spill out into other areas of our lives that aren’t life or death situations. This unhealthy fear causes us to make decisions based on an emotion that doesn’t correspond to the circumstance. Unhealthy fear can often be caused by trauma or hurtful experiences that we have gone through. Left unchecked, unhealthy fear can begin to manifest as anxiety or worry, playing a role God never intended it to play in our lives!” Author and podcaster for “48 Days to the Work You Love” Dan Miller states “Yes, these are challenging times. And yes, we recommend you carefully protect yourself.  Stay away from people spreading fear Stay away from those trying to damage your dream Don’t spend time with complainers and those pointing blame Protect your confidence and optimism Be creative about seeing new opportunities - as always And yes, wash your hands. Is the media creating an out of bounds atmosphere of fear?  Probably. Are people who are trying to marginalize this pandemic being unrealistic?  Probably.  What am I going to do during this time?  I plan to exercise caution while living my life and looking for what this makes possible.  I am going to enjoy my family and friends.  I will protect myself and my family and friends by avoiding close contact with crowds, and yes, washing my hands regularly.  We eat out a lot, more than we should.  We still will do that but we are looking at expanding our cooking options at home and have fun with that to limit going out for meals a bit. We are planning to get out and ride bikes and kayak and take walks in the park. I believe that I will come out of this with a new appreciation for things that will ultimately lead my wife and I to have a healthier and more joyful life.  These are activities that can easily be enjoyed to take the place of visiting theme parks, events, and travel that aren’t options right now. I will absolutely not have the TV blaring the news constantly.  And I will not make decisions if I am drunk or fearful. Action Item:  Ask yourself what this time of uncertainty makes possible.  Plan to do one thing that allows you to do something new or something you haven’t done in a while that will calm your mind.  Maybe visiting someplace you haven’t been, getting outside, exercising Psalm 27:1  The Lord is my light and my salvation—     whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—     of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:13-14 I remain confident of this:     I will see the goodness of the Lord     in the land of the living.  Wait for the Lord;     be strong and take heart     and wait for the Lord. Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Matthew 6:27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Resources: Healthy Fear Vs. Unhealthy Fear: The Center For Lifechange Dave Ramsey on Potential Stock Market Crash Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 23 of “Your Encore Life”.  In this episode we are continuing our series on finding joy. The main source I have been using for this series is the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora.  In episode 17 we talked about what the joy model is, which is based on “Being” and “Doing” on horizontal and vertical axis’s. Beginning with episode 18 we began talking about what Spadafora has landed on as a process for integrating “being” and “doing” in a healthy way that that leads to lasting joy, which has 6 components that make up the acronym “MASTER”.  So far we have discussed Margin in episode 18, Abide in episode 19, Self-Awareness in episode 20, Treasure in episode 21, and Engagement in episode 22. I encourage you to go back and listen to the previous episodes in this series if you haven’t already, but they stand alone well so you don’t need to do that prior to listening to this episode. This week we will be talking about the last component in the acronym MASTER, which is about Relationships. I would say that one of the most important components of joy has been saved for last. In a blog post by John Maxwell titled “Five Steps for Connecting with Others, John says “Connection is a critical part of leadership, because you can’t lead if no one will follow. You have to connect with others in order to be a leader. With that in mind, I want to share the following five steps for connecting with anyone. It can be a someone new, someone familiar, or someone you’re attempting to re-connect with after time. No matter who the other person is, if you’ll follow these five steps, you’ll be certain to create a genuine connection with them. Step One: Set aside your agenda—if you want to connect with other people, you must make their agenda your priority in that moment. Genuine connection isn’t about making sure people understand you; it’s about making sure you understand other people. Clear your mind of your own worries, fears, ambitions, and plans, in order to focus on what the other person has to say. Step Two: Ask curious questions—this goes hand in hand with my first point, because the practical step for getting out of your own head is to ask questions that help you get into the head of someone else. Curious questions have a layering effect; they build on one another and help drive the conversation to new and interesting places. Curious questions also help the other person know you’re engaged with them and want to keep the connection going. Step Three: Lean into the conversation—this is the mid-point of connection, and it’s where self-discipline is most important. Leaning into a conversation is NOT the same as taking over a conversation. Leaning in does not mean shifting the rest of the conversation to you and your interests. Leaning in means increasing your curiosity and adding in thoughts that spur the connection deeper. It’s renewing your interest in your connection with the other person. Step Four: Make a memorable moment— memorable moments don’t need to be manufactured, but they do need to be sought. A connection becomes memorable when both parties walk away with something positive to hold onto. Making a memorable moment doesn’t require a lot, but it does require authenticity on your part. You can make a memorable moment by zeroing in on a significant lesson you learned, or a statement that impacted you. It could be a shared laugh, a moment of grief, or a deep sense of community with the other person. Step Five: Keep the connection alive—while it’s hard to create a connection, keeping one alive is considerably easier. It’s an intentional decision to keep the other person with you in some way. You might exchange encouraging texts or send one another helpful emails from time to time. Maybe it’s just the courtesy of remembering that person’s name so you can greet them and quickly reconnect the next time you see them. Do what you need to do to keep the spark alive, so you can build on it in the future.” An article by Northwestern Medicine titled: 5 Benefits of Healthy Relationships they state that “As humans, the relationships we form with other people are vital to our mental and emotional wellbeing, and really, our survival. Humans have an inherent desire to be close to other people. To connect and build relationships. While a man stranded on an island, talking to a volleyball (you remember the movie!) isn’t necessarily “healthy,” his compulsion for company is. That’s because the fact of the matter is, healthy relationships (romantic relationships, friendships, familial relationships -- they all count!) can help make for a healthier overall life. Everyone is unique and has their own needs and desires when it comes to relationships, handling stress and living a healthy, meaningful life. If you’re the type of person who enjoys being alone, that’s okay too, but attempting to make a couple close relationships could mean noticeable benefits to your mental and physical health. Sometimes having at least one good friend (or trusted co-worker, therapist or counselor) to help walk you through issues like social anxiety or depression can end up being more than worth it. It might be difficult, but it also might be exactly what you need. Even just having one or two strong, healthy relationships in your life can have a positive effect on health.” In the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora, he starts out the discussion on relationships with a quote by Charles Spurgeon who said “Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong. It’s knowing the difference between right and almost right”. He says that is the consideration we are faced with in considering our relationships and deciding how much time we should dedicate to which relationships.  Spadafora goes on to say that “poorly managed and neglected relationships are far and away the most common reason for self-inflicted pain in peoples’ lives. I can remember people saying “quality over quantity” when trying to reason with not spending time with family and those closest to you.  The fact is that time itself is the most valuable gift you can give anyone.  And while you are spending that time, it is important to be present, really present with the person or people with the time you do spend.  Quality and quantity are both important to having a deep relationship. Being in the same room while working on your computer or answering emails or being on social media on your phone is not quality time or being present. The book states that “if we had a crystal clear picture of what we want our most important relationships to look like twenty years from now, we might have more motivation to be more strategic about how we treat those closest to us. Or, conversely, if we had a sense of what life twenty years from now with obliterated relationships would be like, we’d be motivated to make some positive changes right now.”  Think about your relationships you have outside of family.  What are they motivated by? Do you think it could be selfish ambition or self promotion? How can relationships you have bring true joy by being motivated to serve and add value to others?  Spadafora says to “be brutally honest with yourself about the heart issues (ego, pride, fear, insecurity, greed) that are deteriorating your relationships. Self-deception about what really drives your thinking and interpersonal interactions will hold you back. Your relationships and life will never be all you want if you can’t get real with yourself. Self-authenticity is an unequivocal prerequisite to growth and joy. Philippians 2:5-8 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus Who, being in very nature[a] God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature[b] of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross! One of the most important elements of cultivating healthy relationships is the area of communication.  We will talk more about this in future episodes, but I believe the key to effective communication is the lost art of listening.  Truly listening and being present in the situation is a huge gift to others.  Listening isn’t just waiting for your turn to talk or finishing others thoughts for them. When it does come time to speak, choose your words carefully.  Spadafora states that you can ruin a relationship “with wrong word choice, inappropriate tone, bad timing, or offensive body language. Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Action Item: Spend time thinking about a relationship that is very important to you and consider these questions: Do I take the real time and quality time needed to have a deep relationship? Do I listen intently and make sure the person knows what they say is important? Is my motivation in this relationship to serve and add value? In a blog post by Rick Warren titled: “Life Is All About Relationships” Warren says “ Nobody ever asks for things in the final moments of life. They always ask for people, because eventually everybody learns that life is all about relationships. Why not learn that sooner? It sure would relieve a lot of stress. Life is not about achievements. It’s not about accomplishments. Life is about relationships.” Resources: Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Five Steps for Connecting With Others: John Maxwell 5 Benefits of Healthy Relationships: Northwestern Medicine Life is All About Relationships: Rick Warren Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 22 of “Your Encore Life”.  In this episode we are continuing our series on finding joy. The main source I have been using for this series is the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora.  In episode 17 we talked about what the joy model is, which is based on “Being” and “Doing” on horizontal and vertical axis’s. Beginning with episode 18 we began talking about what Spadafora has landed on as a process for integrating “being” and “doing” in a healthy way that that leads to lasting joy, which has 6 components that make up the acronym “MASTER”.  So far we have discusses Margin in episode 18, Abide in episode 19, Self-Awareness in episode 20, and Treasure in episode 21. I encourage you to go back and listen to the previous episodes in this series if you haven’t already, but they stand alone well so you don’t need to do that prior to listening to this episode. This week we will be talking about Engagement. This step is all about getting in the game, or taking steps to get from where you are now to where you know you want to be, where God has called you to be.  I have talked about “analysis paralysis” and my struggles with that. In an article titled “Avoid Decisions, Avoid Life” by Jeff Stibel in the Harvard Business Review, he states “People get overwhelmed with choices, bombarded with information, and become afraid of the risk of drawing a line in the sand. Psychologists have a term for this — choice overload. In the presence of an abundance of information or too many choices, people often become overwhelmed and frozen. Those individuals inevitably revert to what is easiest, effectively making no decision at all. That can be dangerous in business and in life. One study showed that when presented with many products (jelly, in this case), most consumers tend to default to the easiest choice: buying nothing at all.  Isn’t this what happens to us when we aren’t sure what our “next thing” should look like.  What do we do next to be able to live our “encore life”? We talked earlier about doing low cost probes, or trying things that you feel might resonate with you without investing too much money or time.  That is a very effective method of finding what really makes your heart sing without feeling overcommitted or stuck doing something that you realize doesn’t make your heart sing.  Go back and listen to episode 20 or look at the show notes for more information on low cost probes.   Stibel goes on to say in the article that “Another painful lesson in choice aversion is the fact that far too many people choose not to choose, by default allowing decisions to be made for them. They go through life trying to avoid risk, and that often means avoiding decisions. As a general rule, “losses loom larger than gains” and that is what causes people to regret bad decisions and reflexively avoid them altogether. Part of the fun in what we accomplish is learning, exploring, and trying new things. You just can’t do that without making decisions.” Jeff Spadafora in “The Joy Model” states that he “can predict when you will take that first step to engage in the work that represents your life purpose.  It’ll happen when one of two things occur: (1) when you realize that the blessings you have are so clearly from God and your gratitude becomes so overflowing that you can’t help but pay it forward, or (2) when you truly-deep down in your bones-recognize the emptiness and folly of self centered living.” So what might this look like for you as your are at or near retirement and want to live your best encore life? It could mean starting a business, working for an organization, or volunteering for a non-profit or charitable organization that aligns with a passion you have or a hobby you love.  It could be spending time and listening to people close to you that you haven’t given much of your gift of time to.  It could be supporting aging parents or helping care for grandchildren. We will talk more about this in a future episode. It could and should include hobbies, interests, and travel that the promise of more freedom of time will allow. Spadafora states that he has “seen people transform their love for hunting, snowboarding, quilting, and car racing into their callings. Think about the hobbies and activities that you enjoy and how you might use them to get people together that will provide the opportunity to bless other, perhaps give the opportunity to share God’s love.  Remember that God gave you strengths, talents, and your heart and passion for what breaks or makes your heart sing for a reason and purpose. Let’s take a moment to circle back to review the Joy Model.  Remember it has “Being” on the horizontal axis and “Doing” on the vertical axis. The bottom left box following the Being axis is “The Frustrated Believer”, the bottom right box is “The Heartless Hypocrite”. Following the “Doing” axis begins again with “The Frustrated Believer in the bottom left box, with “The Weary Worker in the top left box.  If we are out of balance with being or doing we will fall into the heartless hypocrite or weary worker box.  A balance of being and doing leads us to the upper right quadrant called “The Joyful Follower”.  Now let’s talk about the difference between volunteering and calling as it related to the model. Spadafora puts volunteering in the lower left frustrated believer quadrant and calling in the upper right joyful follower quadrant. He goes on to explain that the two ways to serve others is to pitch in where and when needed, and the other is  through our callings, which he says is the “full stewardship of how God wired us”. Both are important for serving others and society, and good for our souls, but it is true that God has wired us with unique talents and strengths that He gave us for a purpose. With that in mind, Spadafora says that “in addition to selfless volunteerism, we should also be intentional about discerning and engaging in our calling.” He says “missing out on your true calling leads to missing out on the full joy God has available to you.” The key is to be patient and try low cost probes that we talked about in the last couple episodes. If your first probe comes up short, consider it part of the learning process. Give yourself margin and abide and trust God. Proverbs 3:5-6 New International Version (NIV) Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;  in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.[a] Romans 12:2 New International Version (NIV)  2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Ephesians 2:10 New International Version (NIV) 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Action Item: Think about the one thing you have been wanting to do but have put it off by going through the “analysis paralysis” process?  Take one bold step that will get you closer to accomplishing this without further analysis, perhaps by doing a low cost probe. Join us next week we complete this series by talking about the “R” in the acronym MASTER, which is Relationships.  I believe we are saving the most important for last, so don’t miss it. Resources: Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Avoid Decisions, Avoid Life (Jeff Stibel) : Harvard Business Review Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 21 of “Your Encore Life”.  In this episode we are continuing our series on finding joy. The main source I have been using for this series is the book “The Joy Model” by Jeff Spadafora.  In episode 17 we talked about what the joy model is, which is based on “Being” and “Doing” on horizontal and vertical axis’s. Beginning with episode 18 we began talking about what Spadafora has landed on as a process for integrating “being” and “doing” in a healthy way that that leads to lasting joy, which has 6 components that make up the acronym “MASTER”.  So far we have discusses Margin in episode 18, Abide in episode 19, and Self-Awareness in episode 20. I encourage you to go back and listen to the previous episodes in this series if you haven’t already, but they stand alone well so you don’t need to do that prior to listening to this episode. This week we are taking about the “T” in MASTER, which is “Treasure”.   The Joy Model book refers to treasure as “The Green Monster” that is the number 1 reason “people hold back from courageously pursuing the lives that will lead them to true joy.” Let’s be honest here.  Money tends to dominate most of our thinking. When money is considered above all else, it can be said that it has become an idol and could keep us from doing what we know in our hearts we need to do to build a life of greater joy.  When you put money in the proper perspective where it belongs in relation to God and family, money will lose its idol characteristics and will no longer dominate your thinking. So is money evil?  1 Timothy 6:10 [Full Chapter] For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. Take note that it does not say “money is the root of evil” but rather, ”the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.”  Money is a gift from God, and the more money an individual has, the more they are able to bless others who are in need. The book references a “recent study of US adults that showed while money matters, the incremental impact on a person’s joy starts to diminish dollars for dollar after the $75,000 annual income mark.  In another study, Martin Seligman, the author of “Flourish” notes that “Life satisfaction in the United States has been flat for fifty years while GDP has tripled. GDP being Gross Domestic Product, which measures the value of economic activity within a country. Realizing that money and joy are not as aligned as you may think is a huge step toward joy and freedom. How many of you can look back on your careers and say that as you worked your way up the ladder you experienced more joy?  Do any of you look back and think about a role in your career that you felt was fulfilling what you were meant to do, but because of success you moved up the ladder and out of your calling, actually feeling less joy as you earned more money and what was considered a better position.  I experienced that with my position in the school district.  As I have said in the very first episode of this podcast, I had to find a way within my position to align my passion with my role because I had worked my way out of my passion. I began to buy into the lie that so many people buy into, that my self-worth was directly correlated to my income. I wasn’t strong enough to not care about what others may think of me and to care more about what God gave me strengths to do best. So are we saying that having significant amounts of money and a life of joy can’t co-exist?  Not at all.  Spadafora says “You can have the life you’ve always wanted and lots of money.  You and God would both be pleased with that.  The problem is when we think it’s the money that will give us the joy we crave.” He goes on to say “There are plenty of poor people who have chased the money and missed out on the joy too. At the end of the day, both the rich and the poor run the risk of being exhausted-and regretful-about the time and relationships that slipped away while they chased the next buck. If you are a person of faith, then you realize that God gave you your talents, strengths, and relationships that give you the ability to earn money, making it His. Action Item:  Regardless of how much or little you make, try boosting your joy by seeing using some of His money to bless others. Search your heart to see if an unhealthy focus on money could be standing in the way of experiencing lasting joy. Luke 16:10 “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. Hebrews 13:5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Join us next week we will be talking about the “E” in the acronym MASTER, which is engagement. Resources: Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Welcome to episode 20 of “Your Encore Life”.  In this episode we are continuing our series on finding joy.  We have discussed the difference between happiness and joy, The Joy Model from the book with the same name with the emphasis on being and doing and the importance of balance between those.  Episode 18 we began talking about the acronym MASTER from the Joy Model, with the importance of having “M”argin in your life.  Episode 19 we talked about “A”bide, or to be with or live with, referring to making God the center of our lives. Today we will be talking about the S in MASTER, which is self-awareness. An article by Tchiki Davis, Ph.D. in Psychology Today, they state Self-awareness involves, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs. It is important, because it’s a major mechanism influencing personal developmentSelf-awareness involves monitoring our stress Self-awareness requires self-examination to become more aware of your strengths and weaknesses regarding your well-being). Be aware, though, that an honest, non-judgmental self-analysis isn’t easy. We tend to berate ourselves for our failings or fantasize about how great we are, when neither is actually the case. We all have a mix of good and bad traits, but we are largely unaware of them. In order to self-reflect objectively, we need to quiet our minds and open our hearts, forgiving ourselves for our imperfections and offering ourselves kudos, but only where we deserve them. Increasing self-awareness of false attitudes or inappropriate behaviors requires peace of mind, time, attention and focus. Knowing ahead of time that we can indeed change in positive ways through deeper self-awareness makes it worth working on those personal qualities we most value. But first we must look within ourselves through self-examination to see what’s there, which is often less obvious than we think. In the book “The Joy Model” that I have been using as a guideline for this series, Jeff Spadafora say self-awareness “is more than just knowing your skills and talents.  It’s about knowing how you relate to God, how you communicate with others, how you think and process information, what things you avoid, what you are passionate about, and other components the are unique to you.  He goes on and talks about the false attitudes as a false self, saying it “is a character, personality, title, position, and identity that we have built up for public display over the years. The energy we put into portraying this False Self to the world is rooted in the emotions of fear, anger, shame, guilt, greed, pride, lust, jealousy, etc.” “People only detach from these emotions and the False Self when they are confident they have a safety net of God’s love to fall into. Why do we create this False Self for a public display?  Why can’t we be comfortable with who we are, who God created us to be.  The realization that God loves us unconditionally and invites us to come as we are to Him gives me a tremendous sense of calm and peace.  I know how often I have used my False Self to be accepted, to make an impression, to try to climb the corporate ladder, to make people like me or impress them. We seek acceptance so much that we often stifle our true selves. If we can rest in the acceptance that the all powerful Creator of the Universe loves us as we were created to be by Him, we can give up the False Self and experience joy as our True Self. The article in Psychology Today I referenced earlier writes of several ways we can build self-awareness.  They include: Walking, especially in the quiet of nature, can be useful in building self-awareness. The mind tends to wander along with our feet, so with a little conscious nudging (and walking), we can examine our part in something that is happening in our lives now — at work, in social situations, in our relationships, or within the family. Practicing mindfulness can increase self-awareness.Mindfulness includes focused attention in the moment to whatever one is doing, and involves practices such as meditation or quieting of the mind. Becoming a good listener can increase self-awareness. “Getting out of ourselves” by focusing on another person is a good antidote to stop downward spirals of self-destructive thinking. Journaling is a good way to become more self-aware. By writing your thoughts or stream-of-consciousness ideas, you begin opening up to those vulnerable places within. It is here that the mother lode of self-awareness dwells. Feedback from others can help you be more self-aware. Since we are our own best audience, we may miss something in our self-appraisal. That’s where the objectivity of others can be most helpful in self-assessment. If you have the courage, ask a friend or acquaintance their opinion of you, or ask about how you managed some project you worked on together or how you handled yourself in some quirky situation. Self-awareness can help you know your strengths and weaknesses.  There are many assessments that can help you become more self-aware.  One of my favorites is the Clifton StrengthsFinder assessment.  I am a certified Strengths Champion Coach and truly believe that this assessment has tremendous value in clarifying your strengths and how to best utilize them and how to manage what may be weaknesses while focusing on your strengths.  There are many others as well, such as the DISC profile and the Enneagram, which has gained popularity of late.  If you would like to discuss any of this with me please reach out.  I will offer my podcast listeners a special on the Clifton Strengths assessment and a 60 minute coaching session to clarify your results. Spadafora warns that “if you are truly honest as you examine yourself, you will start to get some clarity on what to do at both the spiritual (being) and practical (doing) levels, but rarely will you get full clarity.  The temptation for many is to stay in the introspection mode of building self-awareness for too long.”  He refers to this as “perpetual naval gazing”. Bob Buford in his book “Halftime”, suggests doing what he refers to as “low cost probes” that move you from introspection to action.  Things such as volunteering to serve meals at a homeless shelter if your heart aches for the homeless, or at a pregnancy center that promotes life if abortion breaks your heart as it does the heart of Jesus.  If kids that don’t have a father figure or are on the foster care system tugs at your heart, be a mentor to a kid through the school system or local foster care program. As you become more in tune with your true self, start dreaming again. The sad truth is that most adults stop dreaming when they reach their mid 20’s. Action Item:  Write down your answer to the following question:  If time, money, and failure weren’t obstacles, what would you do with your life?  That is a powerful question to ponder, but allow yourself to dream again. Join us next week we will be talking about the “T” in the acronym MASTER, which is treasure. Resources: What is Self-Awareness, and How do You Get It?: Psychology Today Half Time Institute: The Joy Model and HalfTime Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Here we are with part 4 of Finding Lasting Joy. If you have followed this series since the start at episode 16, you will remember the discussion about the difference between happiness and joy, episode 17 talked about the Joy Model from the book by Jeff Spadafora and how we need to balance being and doing to end up being a joyful follower of Christ. This will resonate if you are a person of faith, but if you are not, the concepts of being and doing still apply and the balance is still the same to lead to joy and satisfaction.. In episode 18, we talked about the importance of having margin in your life so you have time to do the things that are most important. Margin was the "M" in the Acronym MASTER. I am getting this acronym from "The Joy Model" book that I have referenced often in this series and point to in the show notes. I am getting some of the material for these episodes from that book, but am also pulling from other resources which I will reference and from experience. In this episode, I want to talk about the "A" in the acronym, and it stand for abiding. What do we mean by abiding? For purposes of this discussion, we will define it as "to be with" or "to live with", and I am referring to God. This falls on the Being axis as part of the question who is God, who am I. Next week we will discuss the "who am I?" question as we talk about self awareness, the S in the acronym MASTER. I am stating boldly that true joy can be yours when you are spending your time and living with God at the center of your life. John 15:4 says "Abide in Me, and I will abide in you". Hear the words of Jesus promising that He will be in true relationship with us if we will be in true relationship with him. He wants us to experience the lasting joy with Him. Many may feel the Bible is filled with rules that are meant to stifle our joy, but they are the Word of a God that wants us to experience lasting joy filled with peace and purpose. Jeremiah 29:11 NIV says: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” The world bombards us with thoughts that true happiness and joy come with money, prestige, cars, sex, elaborate vacations, and so on.  None of these things are necessarily bad if they aren’t “idols” in our lives, putting them on a higher level than God, and we need to have them while honoring God and having gratitude for them. But seeking these things to see joy is like “chasing the wind” as we talked about last week, leaving us seeking for what’s next since we still feel empty. Romans 12:2 New International Version (NIV) Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Spadafora states that: Our lives won’t change until we change what we focus on and put our energy into. Our focus and energy won’t change unless what we value in life changes. Our values won’t change unless our thinking changes. Our thinking won’t change unless we start putting the right stuff into our brains in the first place. Garbage in - Garbage out Philippians 4:8 New International Version (NIV) Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. How do we abide? Read and study the Bible:  The Bible is truly the Word of God.  It can speak to you as you read.  Even particular scriptures can speak to you differently depending on how God wants to speak to you.  That is why they call it the living word of God.  There are many ways to “read” the Bible.  It can be confusing and frustrating for many just to try to read it cover to cover.  Our church did a series called “The Story” and you can purchase the book, which is the Bible written in chronological order.  It really helped bring each book of the Bible into perspective.  You can read or listen to it with Bible apps that are available.  I have the YouVersion Bible app on my phone and it has many reading plans that are topical, plus a verse of the day.  You can read it from your computer or phone or listen to it.  I take the verse of the day every morning and expand it to the entire chapter and listen to it during my devotional time. Meditate/memorize:  Take quiet time while reading to be still and listen to what you are reading, asking God to open your eyes and ears to what He would have you hear. Prayer: Matthew 7:7-12 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Silence/Solitude: Psalm 46:10  “Be still, and know that I am God Christian Camaraderie: We are better together.  Find a small group or group of friends that you can spend time with and support each other.  We still need to spend time with non-believers and show them love like Jesus did. Fasting: This is a way to become more mindful of God through disrupting our routine by doing without.  It doesn’t necessarily need to be food, but something that you intentionally do without that will make you focus on God.  Make sure you do it safely, especially if you have any medical conditions that you should seek your doctors permission before proceeding. Music/Nature:  As I am putting together this podcast, I am spending a time of solitude in the mountains. I feel closest to God when I am surrounded by His beautiful creation, and I am listening to music while I am here, particularly when I get lonely, which helps me know that God is with me. Lastly, Spadafora states that “Abiding in God moves us from focus on the self to focus on God.” Action item:  Commit to a daily routine to read scripture, spend quiet time, and be in prayer. Find margin in your life to spend at least 15 minutes daily, longer if needed and able.  Do this instead of filling your head with garbage from the morning or evening news.  I promise you if you commit to do this, you will find more peace and clarity in your life.  Abiding is the key to finding true and lasting joy! Next week we will talk about the “S” in MASTER: Self-Awareness Resources: Half Time Institute: The Joy Model The Story Chronological Bible on Amazon Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Today we will continue our topic on finding joy.  During the previous 2 weeks in episodes 16 and 17, we talked about the difference between happiness and joy. As you may recall, Jeff Spadafora in the book “The Joy Model” states that “differentiating joy from the term most often used interchangeably (and incorrectly) with joy: happiness.  Happiness is circumstantial. Joy, on the other hand, continues despite circumstances. I also talked about the model itself and how you need a balance between being and doing.  In review: Being - Who is God….Who am I? Doing - What should I do with my time, talent, treasure, temple, and tribe? The Joy Model is based on four quadrants with a vertical axis labeled as doing (what should I do with my time, talent, treasure, temple, tribe) and the horizontal axis labeled as being (Who is God, who am I). The bottom left square is “The frustrated believer”. The bottom right is labeled “The Heartless Hypocrite”. The top left is labeled “The Weary Worker”, and the top right is labeled “The Joyful Follower”.  As you may have figured out from the quadrant, moving to the top right is the goal and it requires a balance of being and doing.  Without the balance, focusing on being will lead you from a frustrated believer to a heartless hypocrite, where focusing only on doing will lead you from a frustrated believer to a weary worker. Integrating your being and your doing, knowing who you are and using your strengths and talents to add value to others, the community, and world which we live will bring joy. Today’s episode, number 18, we are going to take a deep dive into the “M” of the acronym, MASTER.  We will spend the entire episode on this because it is such a key ingredient in leading a joyful life.  The M is for margin.   Futurists back in the 50’s and 60’s predicted that with the advent of technology and other innovations that would free the human race from menial tasks, the average work week would be 24 hours, giving us unprecedented time for rest and relaxation.  So how has that bold prediction worked for us?  A Harris poll  indicated that the average time for leisure has shrunk by 37% since 1973, and the average workweek since that time has gone from 41 to 47 hours. In his excellent book, Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives, Richard Swenson, M.D. describes margin like this: Margin is the space between our load and our limits. It is the amount allowed beyond that which is needed. It is something held in reserve for contingencies or unanticipated situations. Margin is the gap between rest and exhaustion, the space between breathing freely and suffocating. How do we find margin?  If we look at efficiency, we just need to do what we are already doing faster. Building quality, realistic margin in your life isn’t so much about efficiency and time management as it is about exploring our personal values.  We must remember that saying yes to one thing always means saying no to something else.  If you don’t know what your values and priorities are, you will say yes to anything that looks like it could bring benefit to yourself and bring joy.  The problem is, what brings you lasting joy? Jeff Spadafora in “The Joy Model” says “There’s something one level deeper than our values that compels us to work so hard and overcommit ourselves.  It’s the False Self, which is rooted in fear, guild, comfort, pride, and/or greed and drives us to act in a way that we desperately hope will lead to the approval of others. He poses these questions to answer what is at the root of your business: “Is it fun, energizing activity and work that is a natural outflow of who you are and what you really believe in? Or is it driven by Fear Pride Jealousy Selfishness Greed Boredom The desire to impress others Low self-esteem” I know from working for many years for a large organization that many see business and rushing from one task to another as a badge of honor, but when you look hard at their accomplishments, they are really just running themselves ragged without accomplishing quality work. What I did see far too often is broken families and relationships, poor health, living for the weekend, and living for when they can retire.  That is not joy. It isn’t hard to find people or hear of people who boast (or complain) of long hours, little sleep, no breaks, and many may move up the career ladder.  But many of those people end up in crisis, which can happen at any point in your life. What about as we retire, shouldn’t we have margin then?  How many people retire and you hear them say they are busier than ever.  That’s OK if the business results in fun and energizing activities that are an outflow of who you are and what you believe.  But so many have things they want to accomplish in their encore life but keep repeating the phrase “I don’t know where the time went.”  They have goals and dreams for their encore life and they find themselves 6 months, 1 year, 5 years, or 10 years later still hoping to have time to accomplish them, and still are not experiencing joy. In an article by Lifehacker Magazine titled “Why You Need More Margin in Your Life (and How to Get it), they offer a few tips to help you find more margin.  They include: Get more sleep - 6.5 - 8 hours of sleep is needed by most people. Make that non-negotiable Take advantage of Pareto - The Pareto principle (also known as the 80/20 rule, the law of the vital few, or the principle of factor sparsity) states that, for many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes. Focus on the 20% that gives you the best results and let some of the rest go.  We will talk more about the Pareto Principal in a future episode. Give yourself an extra 15 minutes more than you think to get places and accomplish things.  I am a master at underestimating how much time it takes to get places and do things. Find ways to limit time on social media - Yes, this one comes up again.  Take advantage of some of the new features like screen time on iPhones and iPads and make it a point to reduce social media time, even impose limits on yourself. They go on to say:”Margin has to be cultivated. Spend time every three months looking at your schedule and how you spend your time. Is there anything that can be removed? Are there 15 minute opportunities that you're missing? Are you using your down time to truly recharge? By being honest with yourself and ruthless about your priorities you can increase the likelihood that you stay happy and engaged at work and at home. The Bible says that King Solomon is the wisest and richest man to ever live.  Economic historians state that in terms of percentage of the worlds total wealth, King Solomon was wealthier than John D. Rockefeller and Andrew Carnegie combined.  For reference, Bill Gates and Warren Buffet don’t make the top 10 all time list.  King Solomon states in the Bible: Ecclesiastes 1:14 New International Version (NIV) 14 I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind. I leave you with this action item.  Don’t chase after the wind, be still and listen to it for a moment as you consider what your values and priorities are and what one thing you can do to make more time for them.  Start by taking care of yourself. “As long as habit and routine dictate the pattern of living, new dimensions of the soul will not emerge” -Henry Van Dyke (Writer, Professor, Clergymen) Resources: How to Create More Margin in Your Life: Michael Hyatt Why You Need More Margin in Your Life: Lifehacker Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Bible Gateway Contact Craig

Last week we discussed the difference between happiness and joy.  In review from last week, let’s look again at a what Psychology Today stated: Happiness is external. It's based on situations, events, people, places, things, and thoughts. Happiness is future-oriented and it puts all its eggs in someone else's basket. It is dependent on outside situations, people, or events to align with your expectations so that the end result is your happiness. But happiness is not joy because joy is not external, it can't be bought and it is not conditional on someone else's behavior. In fact, joy is not contingent on anything in order to exist. If you are someone who is at or near retirement age and facing a time of transition, the opportunity to experience joy can be more within reach as you can focus your time on what is most important,  or more fleeting as you move from having your course charted for you, at least partially by your job or career, to seeking what’s next and how to best spend your time. Today we will be introducing The Joy Model from the book written by Jeff Spadafora, director of the halftime institute.  You will find the references to this book in the show notes. As you know I am a man of faith and place my trust in Jesus Christ.  This book is very faith based and the joy model is based two principals: Being - Who is God….Who am I? Doing - What should I do with my time, talent, treasure, temple, and tribe? If you are a person of faith the message of joy from this book will resonate.  If you are not, there are concepts that you will be able to relate to. Everyone ponders the question of being and doing and asks themselves the questions who am I and what should I be doing, or what is my calling.  We will start with how joy is defined in The Joy Model which relates very well to last weeks podcast.  If you haven’t listened to episode 16 from last week, I encourage you to go back after finishing this episode.  Jeff Spadafora starts by “differentiating joy from the term most often used interchangeably (and incorrectly) with joy: happiness.  Happiness is circumstantial.  When things are great at work, in our marriages, in our bank accounts, and with the kids, we are happy. But when our relationships get rocky, work becomes a drag, our investments tank, or the kids start misbehaving, happiness evaporates.  Joy, on the other hand, continues despite circumstances. Spadafora often uses the words peace, comfort, and fulfillment interchangeably with joy. We discussed the formula E + R = O in episode 7, or how your response that you can control can have a positive impact on the outcome of any event, which you may not have any control over.  Understanding this can impact your joy ultimately, and here is why.  Even though Spadafora states that joy is not dependent on circumstances, he does say “you can improve your circumstances and your levels of joy by taking action on things that are within your control, such as your health, relationships, finances, career, and getting them in alignment with God’s ways, and subsequently your’ll find both your circumstances and your joy will improve. He goes on to say “It’s about obedience, about applying God’s principals to the parts of life you have control over”. If you are a person of faith and you don’t feel you are experiencing the joy that is supposed to come as a result of that faith, you may feel guilty, resulting in a negative mindset that you don’t have a strong enough relationship with and trust in Jesus to experience joy, or the being question.  It could result in feeling that you aren’t reading the bible enough, aren’t sharing your faith enough, or aren’t DOING enough to experience joy from your faith. The Joy Model is based on four quadrants with a vertical axis labeled as doing (what should I do with my time, talent, treasure, temple, tribe) and the horizontal axis labeled as being (Who is God, who am I). The bottom left square is “The frustrated believer”. The bottom right is labeled “The Heartless Hypocrite”. The top left is labeled “The Weary Worker”, and the top right is labeled “The Joyful Follower”.  As you may have figured out from the quadrant, moving to the top right is the goal and it requires a balance of being and doing.  Without the balance, focusing on being will lead you from a frustrated believer to a heartless hypocrite, where focusing only on doing will lead you from a frustrated believer to a weary worker. Integrating your being and your doing, knowing who you are and using your strengths and talents to add value to others, the community, and world which we live will bring joy. Two verses in the Bible that speak to this topic are Galatians 5:22-23 for being and Ephesians 2:10 for doing. Galatians 5:22-23 New International Version (NIV) 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Ephesians 2:10 New International Version (NIV) 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Action Item:  Think about theses questions: Where are you on the continuum of being, knowing you are and who God is?  Where are you on the continuum of doing, knowing what you should do with your time, talents, and treasures. Are they balanced and is the point of convergence heading to the upper right? What one area do you need to focus on this week to get the balance you need to point toward joy? “The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.” Russel M. Nelson “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Theodore Roosevelt Next week we will look at a specific plan, a MASTER plan, to help fill the gap from where you are to the joy you so desire. Resources: Psychology Today: Joy vs. Happiness Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Bible Gateway Contact Craig

During the next few episodes we will be talking about joy and experiencing a life of joy, even in times of sadness.  In this episode we will discuss the difference between happiness and joy. The Merriam-Webster dictionary definition of joy and happiness: Joy is the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires. Happiness is a state of well-being and contentment; a pleasurable or satisfying experience. An article in Psychologies Magazine states:  Joy and happiness are wonderful feelings to experience, but are very different. Joy is more consistent and is cultivated internally. It comes when you make peace with who you are, why you are and how you are, whereas happiness tends to be externally triggered and is based on other people, things, places, thoughts and events. They suggest 3 things that you can do to help foster joy. 1.  Meditation. It's important to be able to tap into your heart rather than your head, your intuition rather than your thinking mind. Quietening the chatter in your mind and creating space within allows you to listen more closely to what brings you joy. 2. Cut down on social media. We are so heavily influenced by what we 'should like/do/have/buy' that this so often is not in line with what truly brings us joy. For many of us, social media has become a necessity in our day. If ditching social media altogether is not an option, think about how you can cut down on it. 3. Keep a journal and practice gratitude for the things that bring you joy. Cultivate gratitude wherever possible and even have gratitude for the things that challenge you, as these help you to grow and build strength. This also helps to define what brings you joy and what doesn’t. Having an attitude of gratitude makes us more appreciative and trusting, gives us better self-esteem and helps us bounce back from stress. It allows us to view the world, and our situation within this world, in a more positive, healthy way. An article I reference in Psychology Today states:  Happiness is external. It's based on situations, events, people, places, things, and thoughts. Happiness is future-oriented and it puts all its eggs in someone else's basket. It is dependent on outside situations, people, or events to align with your expectations so that the end result is your happiness. But happiness is not joy because joy is not external, it can't be bought and it is not conditional on someone else's behavior. In fact, joy is not contingent on anything in order to exist. Making a large purchase of something that you have wanted can make you happy, but does it cause you joy.  How many times have you been so happy because of something you acquired, such as a new car, house, boat, clothes, and the list goes on.  How often can you say, knowing what we have heard about the difference between joy and happiness, has the acquisition ended up giving you joy? How often has it resulted in regrets? We will be talking about why joy can be so elusive, even when we experience happiness.  We will talk about why people experience joy even while living in the darkest places or experiencing great difficulty. Much of the discussion will take place around the book The Joy Model by Jeff Spadafora of the Halftime Institute. Action Item:  Send me a comment about what makes you experience joy, or what you feel is keeping you from experiencing a sense of joy.  Email your comments to craig@craigcoilecoaching.com or put them in the comments section under the show notes for this episode at craigcoilecoaching.com/encore.  While you are doing this, please take time to leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform. Joy, feeling one's own value, being appreciated and loved by others, feeling useful and capable of production are all factors of enormous value for the human soul. - Maria Montessori The exercise of benevolence is joy to loving hearts: the more pain it costs, the more joy it is. Kind actions make us happy, and in such joy we find communion with the great heart of Jesus. -Charles Spugeon Resources: Psychologies: Joy vs. Happiness Psychology Today: Joy vs. Happiness Half Time Institute: The Joy Model Contact Craig

We have spent a great deal of time since the beginning of this podcast on big life issues such as living an intentional life, how you respond to any event allows you to have some control over the outcome, avoiding living a life with regrets, having a vision, purpose and mission, and developing a life plan and setting goals around your life plan.  We also heard from Mark Ross on what living in your encore life means and the stages of the process, and what his encore life looks like.  As I reviewed my life plan and pondered on the areas that I have done well in and the areas I haven’t, there was one of my life accounts that I have neglected, one that I’m sure many neglect because it seems it may be of lesser importance that the others.  Let me tell you which one it is and why it is of huge importance.   The account that I have neglected the most is avocational. Thoughtco says an avocation is a hobby or any other activity taken up in addition to one's regular work; it may especially refer to something that is a person's "true" passion or interest. A vocation is one's principal occupation, often used in the context of a calling to a particular way of life or course of action. My specific commitments in my avocational life account say I will designate an outdoor hobby that I will participate in regularly, such as biking, hiking, fishing, boating, etc. I will begin learning to play the guitar. Even my specific commitments aren’t specific and certainly don’t come close to being a SMART goal.  I have done some of each of the outdoor activities, but not “regularly”, whatever that means.  I also signed up for an online guitar tutorial 3 years ago and haven’t started yet.  The rest of this episode is to convince you not to be like me and to convince me that it is very important to take this life account seriously. In an article from Best Medicine by Renown Health titled “7 Reasons Why Hobbies are Good for Your Health”,  Christopher D. Stanton, MD, with Renown Medical Group shares some of his favorite hobbies and the benefits past times can have on your health. Mentally or physically demanding hobbies, such as playing music and chess and bridge, reading a complex book, or doing physically demanding exercise can definitely help with brain function. 7 Health Benefits of Having a Hobby Social Support. Hiking, bowling, Bunko or book clubs are all examples of group-related hobbies. Bonding with others adds social support to your life which helps lower stress. Take a Break. Hobbies allow you to take a break while still having a sense of purpose. Hobbies give you time to relax and refocus energy. Save Money. Buying second-hand or garage sale items you can refurbish such as book shelves, garden pots or old frames can save you money. Plus, you’ll be recycling! It’s good for your heart and the planet. Hobbies allow you to stay present and in the zone. This calms the nerves and creates a sense of well-being. Satisfaction. Seeing a project through can create a sense of satisfaction. That once dilapidated bookshelf you sanded, painted and decorated for your child’s room can provide a great sense of accomplishment. Balance. Hobbies provide balance in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Spending the day with your kids is great and then balancing that with a night of bowling with friends helps you refocus, energize and feel more prepared to take on life’s challenges. Positive Stress. Eustress or “Good Stress.” As Dr. Stanton points out, Eustress helps us view stressors in our lives as challenges rather than threats. This is the type of positive stress that keeps us vital and excited about life. By looking forward to your Tango dance lesson and meeting new people, you can trigger Eustress. An article in the Huffington Post titled “Healthy Hobbies that will Improve Your Health” states: “Practicing a lifestyle of holistic wellness includes more than eating right and working out. It also includes making time for yourself and doing what you love. Spending your down time on your favorite hobbies benefits your overall wellbeing in many ways.  According to a 2015 study, engaging in leisure activities was defined as “self-selected, self-rewarding behavioral pursuits that take place during non-work time.” Participants in this study who engaged in leisure activities were found to be happier, less bored, less stressed, and had lower heart rates. Leisure activities were also implied to be a great way to increase productivity and job performance, as they help boost creativity and give your brain a much-needed break.” There are many hobbies that can be turned into fun and healthy activities. Here are eleven of them: Dancing. This pastime has been shown to promote heart health, strengthen bones, and manage a healthy weight. Not only is dancing wonderful exercise, but it’s a lot of fun too! There are many different types of dancing, from hip-hop to ballroom. Taking some dancing classes will help you discover which type of dancing suits you the best, plus you’ll meet some new friends too! Cooking. Learning to cook nutritious meals is great for your health and wallet. Cooking healthy meals at home meals saves you money in the long-run, and it’s a great way to bond with your family as well. Volunteering. Having a presence in your community is great for your emotional and social health. Volunteering can help keep you physically and mentally active. Giving back will also give you a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Gardening. There are many unexpected health benefits of gardening. Getting your hands dirty has been shown to decrease stress and promote self-esteem. It’s also a great way to get in some physical activity while it improves your hand strength and dexterity. Another perk of gardening? Beautiful flowers to decorate your home and delicious vegetables to add to your dinner! Owning a pet. Animals have been shown to improve well being on both a physical and mental level. Owning a pet decreases the risk of depression, stress, and anxiety. On the physical side of things, owning a pet has been shown to lower blood pressure and help keep you active. Music. While music can be difficult to pick up after a certain age, it’s definitely not impossible. Playing an instrument is fantastic for boosting creativity and happiness. Music also improves visual and verbal skills and reduces depression and anxiety. Yoga. One of the best things about yoga is that is beneficial for any age and any fitness level. Yoga increases physical strength, boosts energy, and promotes cardio and circulatory health. Yoga is also an excellent way to practice mindfulness, which will leave you less stressed and more productive. Walking. Regular brisk walking is incredible for weight management and your overall physical health. While walking may not sound like the ideal way to spend your free time, walking clubs and hiking make this healthy hobby and an enjoyable and versatile way to live better. Traveling. Planning a trip and hitting the road is sincerely satisfying for anyone who loves to explore or try something new. Traveling and experiencing new cultures shifts your perspective and promotes self-discovery. It offers you a chance to meet and connect with people so you can learn and grow. Traveling will also keep you active and on your feet.  Reading. Pick up a book! The mental benefits of reading are too good to pass up. Reading has been shown to increase mental stimulation, reduce stress, improve memory, and boost concentration. Not only is reading a good book fun and entertaining, it also produces a sense of tranquility and wellbeing.  Writing. Journaling, blogging or even creative writing serves as an outlet for self-expression. Writing for leisure has been shown to reduce stress and improve sleep. If you chose to share your writing with the public, it’s also a great way to form connections with other people who have similar interests. An article published by the Australian Government Department of Health titled “Purposeful Activities - Hobbies” states: Spending time on an activity that you enjoy can improve your mental health and wellbeing. Research shows that people with hobbies are less likely to suffer from stress, low mood, and depression. Activities that get you out and about can make you feel happier and more relaxed. Group activities like team sports can improve your communication skills and relationships with others. Your interests may be creative, athletic, academic, or something distinctly personal. You may choose a hobby that you can do alone or as part of a group. Whatever your interests are, there is sure to be a hobby out there for you. What matters is that it is something you find meaningful and enjoyable. This article gives four specific types of hobbies and the corresponding benefits.  They are: Recreational and relaxation activities reduce stress Getting involved in a creative activity or hobby can make you feel better the next day Exploring creatively with others will support recovery from mental health problems Physical activity through sports helps to enhance well being The article that I have included in the show notes gives the specifics for each of these benefits and the research behind it. My new specific commitments for avocational are: I will participate in an outdoor activity a minimum of 2 times per week beginning January 2020 which will include hiking, biking, fishing, kayaking, etc. I will begin lesson 1 of the guitar tutorial the week of January 20th and adjust this commitment as I see what is involved to make satisfactory progress (to be determined once I begin). Action Item:  Ask yourself: “What specific hobby do I have that I need to spend more time doing for pure enjoyment and to take advantage of the health benefits”?  If you don’t have a hobby or activity, I suggest you spend time exploring the links I provided in the show notes or find other resources to help you determine where to start. Resources: Definition of Avocation - ThoughtCo 7 Reasons Why Hobbies are Good for Your Health: Best Medicine by Renown Health Healthy Hobbies that will Improve Your Life Head to Health: Australian Government Department of Health Contact Craig

Now that we are at the beginning of a new year and a new decade, we are bound to be envisioning the future, at least the next year.  Hopefully many of you have set goals or New Years resolutions and have a plan to be part of the 8% that keep the resolutions and not the 92% that don’t.  Better yet, you may have created a life plan as we discussed over the past few weeks as the structure, or framework from which you can hang your goals. This can also be a great time to reflect on the previous year and celebrate accomplishments and milestones, but there is bound to be hard things, plans and hopes that went unfulfilled, even events that caused heartache. This is what I see as I look back on 2019: Birth of our first grandchild Loss of my mother just days later Birth of a second grandchild Long career that I needed to close out earlier than expected New beginnings in my encore Loss of my father in law Loss of a beloved uncle   I hope that sharing my story has resonated with some of you.  I hope that you can see the joy of things to be celebrated, the sorry of loved ones lost, while being forever grateful to have had them in your life and the lessons learned from their legacies. I hope that you can see how planning your career and future can end up very differently from what you planned and maybe hoped for, but how that can often turn into being a gift, a blessing from God to be given the opportunity to take care of more important things, to grow from the trial, and for new beginnings. Action Item for this week: Reflect back on 2019 and think about what you can celebrate, be grateful for, and given you opportunities for growth. Then envision 2020 and how you can carry on the successes and turn the struggles from the past into growth opportunities for your envisioned future. “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland” (Isaiah 43:18-19). God tells us, even in the Old Testament, that He is doing a new thing. A new thing is a good thing. He is making a WAY for us in the wilderness, He is giving us streams of living water in times we are in the wastelands.  “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17). There it is! Right on the pages of God’s Word we are told that we are being made new. We can choose to believe it and walk in that truth, or we can deny the power of God and His power to change even the deadest of hearts into hearts softened with love. He is making all things new, He is bringing the dead back to life! “You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.” —Mary Pickford “And now let us welcome the new year, full of things that never were.” —Rainer Maria Rilke “The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide you’re not going to stay where you are.” —John Pierpont “J.P.” Morgan Resources: AARP Family Caregiving Resources Bible verses for "New Beginnings" on crosswalk.com Contact Craig

New Years Resolutions - Setting Goals For 2020 That Won’t End Up a Negative Statistic I am excited about this podcast as we enter into a new year.  Some things I have planned are: Many awesome guests with great stories and experiences of what living your best encore life looks like Having a place where listeners can go to leave voice messages that we can share on the podcast of you, the listeners of this podcast can share your encore stories, struggles, and questions. Since we have ended our 3 session series on life planning I want to give you a few tips on making sure you get the most out of the process and life plan: Take a full day or two away in an uninterrupted place, away from home and work if possible to create your life plan Review it daily at first, weekly at a minimum Do a thorough review and modify accordingly at least quarterly Take time away, similar to what you did when you first wrote it away from familiar places with interruptions yearly to do a complete review and modify or rewrite sections that are no longer priority based on the season of your life and changes that may have occurred during the past year. While 77 percent of people who committed to a New Year’s resolution stuck to it for at least a week, research conducted by the University of Scranton reveals that only eight percent of people who make New Year’s resolutions will actually fulfill those goals in a timely fashion—if ever. According to data pulled from Google by iQuanti, the most common resolutions made in the New Year are usually centered around getting healthy or simply living life to its fullest. Now that you have an idea or may have started or completed your life plan, you have a framework for which all goals, or New Years Resolutions should fit.  Let’s look at an example for the life account of physical.  You may realize that you are 100 pounds beyond what your ideal weight should be.  You have identified that in your life account as the current reality and have detailed your ideal weight in the envisioned future.  You have made specific commitments to begin January 2nd to follow a specific diet plan and specified how you will increase your physical activity beginning now.  Remember to make your specific commitments incremental and revise them in your life plan as you meet them.  Now you want to make a New Years Resolution, or goal for  2020 that gets you closer to your envisioned future of being at the ideal weight.  It might sound like this: I will weight xxx (-20 lbs.) by June 1, 2020, or xxx (-80 lbs.) by December 31, 2020. You can also make longer term goals, like 3-5 years out, stating that you will weigh xxx (-100 lbs.) by December 31, 2023. Remember from last week using the formula for creating SMART goals: Specific - What exactly are you committing to?  Non-negotiable Measurable - Quantify the result Actionable - Must start with an action verb such as run, walk, complete, quit… Realistic - Must be attainable, but best if it stretches you Time-Bound - Must have a time period that you will commit to, such as frequency, how many, …  Goals must have  completed by or due date You can find as many suggestions and resources as you can absorb on how to set and write goals.  I have found that the goals I have get accomplished when I plug them into my life plan’s life accounts.  You need to find the strategy that makes most sense to you.  We all learn and grow differently.  There is a strategy that many people have found very effective using the 12 Week Year Plan.  I have included a link to information about that in the show notes. From the “Transformed Small Group Study” by Rick Warren, the question is asked “What Kind of Goal Does God Bless?  Three questions to answer that are: Will this honor God? “We make it our goal to please him” - 2Corinthians 5:9 (NIV) Is the goal motivated by love? “Let love be your highest goal” -1Corinthians 14:1 (NLT) Will this goal require you to depend on God? “We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it” - Proverbs 16:9 (Mes) Action Item:  Write 1-3 goals that are most important for you to begin your journey to your envisioned future.  Don’t make a laundry list that you get lost with.  Make them not only SMART but exciting for you. Next week we are going to discuss reflecting on this past year and envisioning 2020, and I’ll share some of my personal reflections on a year that has had the best and most difficult events come about, and on my entry into the encore phase of my life. “The best way to predict the future is to create it” - Dan Miller  Begin creating your best encore life in 2020.  Happy New Year! Resources: “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy “This is How Many People Actually Stick to New Years Resolutions” “Get Perfect Vision 2020” :Dan Miller’s 48 Days to the Work You Love Goal Setting Worksheet “The 12 Week Year” Transformed Small Group Study - Rick Warren Contact Craig

In this 3rd episode of the series “2020 Vision for 2020”, we are going to go over the specific commitments section of the life plan.  Just a quick overview of where we have come since beginning this series on life planning: Episode 10 we talked about beginning with the end in mind by writing down what legacy you want to leave.  The action step was to write what people you designated would say when they eulogize you or after. Episode 11 we talked about creating categories in your life plan, or what the book “Living Forward” refers to as life accounts.  This includes areas like Spiritual, Intellectual, Physical, Spouse, Children, Co-worker, etc. and writing a purpose statement for each, a statement of vision for where you want to be for your envisioned future when this category is at its best, a statement of current reality, and if applicable an inspiring quote or scripture. Today is where we form an action plan, or make specific commitments for each life account that will eventually bridge the gap between our current reality and our envisioned future of where we need to be.  It is important to write you commitments as SMART goals. Specific - What exactly are you committing to?  Non-negotiable Measurable - Quantify the result Actionable - Must start with an action verb such as run, walk, complete, quit… Realistic - Must be attainable, but best if it stretches you Time-Bound - Must have a time period that you will commit to, such as frequency, how many, …  Goals must have  completed by or due date Make a list of action items for each one of your life categories, or accounts. Since a life plan is a living, breathing document, make your specific commitment action items incremental while still stretching yourself.  An example may be: Physical Life Account: A goal you may have for 2020 would be to run a 5K by the first day of summer.  You can create a specific commitment to go out and walk/run 4 days a week for 30 minutes.  That may mean you just walk four doors down the street in the first 2 weeks, 1/2 block after 4 weeks, incrementally increasing until 45 minutes isn’t enough, so increase your commitment to 45 minutes, then 60 minutes. Specific Commitment:  Action commitment to do something to get you from your current reality and your envisioned future. Goals: dictionary.com defines a goal as: the result or achievement toward which effort is directed; aim; end. Goals will need to be written in the SMART format as well, with the time bound being a specific date to accomplish it.  We will talk more about goals in next week in episode 13. Action Item: Write specific commitments, action statements for each of the life categories or accounts that you have that move you from your current reality incrementally to your envisioned future for each. Resources: Vision Board, Dr. Jack Canfield “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy Contact Craig

Much of the information I am going to share is based on the book, “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy as I have mentioned in previous episodes.  You can find the reference and link to the book in the show notes. Last week we talked about beginning your life plan with the end in mind, and your action step was to write down what legacy you hope to leave behind once you are gone by reflecting on what you would want people to say about you at your funeral and after. Today we are going to get down to the specific about several categories, or what the book “Living Forward” call Life Accounts.  Examples of categories, or life accounts that you would want to include are: Spiritual Intellectual Physical Marital Parental Social Financial Vocational Avocational This list is not exhaustive and you can have different names for the categories that may be more specific to you, for instance “spouse” or you spouses name, your children’s names.  You can also add categories such as grandchildren, travel, exercise, etc.  I recommend you list them in order of priority, but that it up to you.  They do recommend putting categories that are related directly to you near the top, such as spiritual, intellectual, and physical.  Although this may feel selfish, it goes along with the thought that you can’t take care of and add value to others until you can take care of yourself. Hyatt and Harkavy suggest there are four considerations when making your list of life accounts: Life Accounts are unique to you. Life Accounts can be names whatever you want. Life Accounts are interrelated. Life Accounts will change over time, as we discussed last week. You will need to get specific for each account.  Each one will need to have the following sections: Purpose Statement:  What is your reason for being in this area, our role? Envisioned Future: What does this area of your life look like when it is at it’s best? Inspiring Quote or Scripture. Current Reality:  Keep it simple and realistic.  Write it as bulleted statements. Specific Commitments:  Similar to goals, what steps do you need to take to get from the current reality to your envisioned future.  These steps will change as you accomplish them and move to more advanced steps. Here is an example of my physical life account from my life plan: Physical: My physical purpose is to maintain my body as God’s temple through proper nutrition, exercise, and following recommended checkups. I am at a very ideal weight for me, and I have the energy to accomplish my daily activities and desires.  I am exercising daily and loving the activities that are giving me great physical benefits.  I have cut my medications to a minimum because of my healthy way of life. I am very conscious about my health and diet, yet often make poor choices, particularly on the nutritional side. I track steps and exercise with an Apple Watch I currently do 35-40 pushups every morning I don’t have a regiment in place for getting enough exercise and strength building. I have cut my BP and Cholesterol medication in half and monitor results Specific Commitments: I will get to and maintain a weight of 175 – 180. I will do cardio and strength building exercises a minimum of 4 times per week. I will read “The Daniel Plan” and make 4 beneficial eating habit changes as a result. I will drink at least 8 – 8 ounce servings of water daily. Inspirational Quote: Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you received from God?  1 Corinthians 6:19 We will get down to more detail about how to write your specific commitments and follow through with making progress with your life plan next week as we conclude the series. Action Step:  Write down your list of between 6 - 12 life categories or accounts.  Write your purpose statement for each, your envisioned future of where you want to be, an inspiring quote or scripture for some of them, and the current reality of where you are now.  Refer back to the show notes for an example of how I have written one of my accounts, but write it in a way that is most meaningful for you.

A life plan is a short written document that is written by you for you.  The life plan we will be discussing starts with the end in mind, how do you want to be remembered, the legacy you leave.  The second part details your life priorities, the who’s and what’s that are most important to you.  The third part details specific actions you will make to reach where you want to be.  This is where you can plug in your goals. A life plan is a living document that needs to be reviewed often and can be modified as you move forward and/or into different seasons of life. In this episode we will talk about beginning with the end in mind.  Think about how you would want each of these relationships to eulogize you and talk about you once you were gone from this earth.  These are just examples but this list is not exhaustive: God (well done good and faithful servant) Spouse Children Grandchildren Closest Friends Casual Acquaintances Those you worked with, your colleagues Those who were in organizations you were part of Teammates Clients you served Your Church The example I will provide is from my co-workers from the school district I just retired from: “Those that I worked with will recall how I always made them feel valued and appreciated.  They will talk about how I always made clear to all my faith, and that I was an example by being His hands and feet in serving those in need.  They will recall my desire for them to grow into leaders that focused on adding value to the lives of others.  They will talk about my honesty and integrity in all things that I did.” In the book “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy, they state that writing your eulogy as part of your life plan will “engage both the head and the heart”.  The book also states that if you can imagine you are attending your own funeral, what conversations would you hear: What would those closest to your life? What stories would they tell one another? Would those stories make them laugh, cry, sigh, or all three? How would they summarize what your life meant to them? Leaving a legacy is inevitable. Leaving a legacy that you want is not, and requires planning and intention. Hyatt and Harkavy go on to write: “Our legacy comprises the spiritual, intellectual, relational, vocational, and social capital we pass on. It’s the sum total of the beliefs you embrace, the values you live by, the love you express, and the service you render to others.” What do you want your legacy to look like with each of the relationships we talked about earlier? Action item:  Write out a list of relationships similar to the ones we discussed and write compelling legacy statements that say how you would want each relationship to remember you. Next week we will talk about listing our priorities and charting the course to live our best encore life by avoiding drifting and charting a course of action for our lives. Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12 | NIV |   In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. Proverbs 16:9 | NIV | There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. Ecclesiastes 3:1 | NIV I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.                 2 Timothy 4:7-8 | NIV  References: “Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy Contact Craig

Follow-up about gratitude post Thanksgiving: Thanksgiving and all the thoughts of gratitude become overshadowed by the shopping frenzy and preparing for the holiday season.  Being inundated by ads can lead us to become dissatisfied with what we do have because it isn’t the newest and best, or we feel we “need” something that never occurred to us before.  We feel stress over preparing for the upcoming Christmas season. Our attitude of gratitude can slide into discontentment for lacking time or stuff.  In an attempt to satisfy our discontentment, we make purchases we can’t afford, which leads to a bigger dissatisfaction of going into debt and losing financial margin.  Being discontented isn’t necessarily bad depending on the source.  Being discontented because you lack financial margin can lead to planning a budget to get out of debt. Being discontented because of a career that is going nowhere can lead to seeking new opportunities.  Great results have come about because someone was discontented over things like lack of food and clean water available for people.  Discontentment can be good if it leads to action for improvement. This is where E + R = O from episode 7 is key. This is where being intentional with how you live your life from episodes 2-4 become foundational. Keep your focus on what you do have to be grateful for and experience the physical and mental health benefits we discussed in last weeks episode. Getting from where you are to where you need to be requires you to have a vision, a purpose, and a mission and follow through.  How do you make sure you aren’t drifting through life?  We will talk about that today and in the next few weeks as we begin our series “20/20 vision for 2020”. Vision:  Image of the future that you hold. Legacy of what your are, who you are.  A mural of you.  What you will leave behind. “The value of life is always determined by how much of your life is given away, not by what you accumulated or hoarded”.  -Andy Stanley Purpose:  This is a brief statement that captures who you are and your part in bringing your vision to life. You're calling, you're being.  What are your strengths and passions? Your answer to the question “Why am I here on earth?” Mission:  Doing. The particular ways you choose to fulfill your purpose in any given season. Author and career coach Dan Miller says a good mission statement should include three things: 1. Your skills and abilities (what you like to do) 2. Your personality traits (how you operate) 3. Your values, dreams and passions (why you want to excel Your vision, purpose, and mission must lead to planning and following through to mean anything. GOALS: Tasks that make up your mission What specific tasks need to be done and when they need to be done to actually accomplish your mission(s) in real life? Must be compatible with and contained within the mission, purpose, and vision. Don’t accept drifting through life, which is what will happen if you don’t know you're why (episode 4), and put together a life plan with associated goals to guide you.  This does not pigeon hole you, as missions, life plans, and goals can and will likely change or need modification in different seasons of our lives. This is particularly important in your encore stage of life, where you won’t necessarily be driven by your place in a particular organization and will have more control over your time.  Don’t let it slip away.  These are living and breathing documents and need to be reviewed regularly.  We will be working on this over the next few weeks so you can begin the year 2020 with 20/20 vision. Action Item:  Think about what your vision, purpose, and mission is or might be in any stage of life. Write it down and keep it handy as we talk about our life plans and goals over the next several weeks leading up to the new year. Resources: Dan Miller: 48 Days to the Work You Love Your Move With Andy Stanley Podcast Contact Craig Listen on Apple Podcast Listen on Spotify Listen on Stitcher Listen on iHeart Radio

Improve your health and well-being by having an Attitude of Gratitude Now is the season to think about what makes you most thankful, but research supports making it a year-round habit. Many studies have found there are benefits of gratitude — both mental and physical — and all it takes to enjoy them is a little bit of introspection. Here are 7 scientifically proven benefits according to an article appearing in Psychology Today Magazine:   Gratitude opens the door to more relationships. Not only does saying “thank you” constitute good manners, but showing appreciation can help you win new friends, according to a 2014 study published in Emotion. The study found that thanking a new acquaintance makes them more likely to seek an ongoing relationship. So whether you thank a stranger for holding the door or send a thank-you note to that colleague who helped you with a project, acknowledging other people’s contributions can lead to new opportunities.   Gratitude improves physical health. Grateful people experience fewer aches and pains and report feeling healthier than other people, according to a 2012 study published in Personality and Individual Differences. Not surprisingly, grateful people are also more likely to take care of their health. They exercise more often and are more likely to attend regular check-ups, which is likely to contribute to further longevity.   Gratitude improves psychological health. Gratitude reduces a multitude of toxic emotions, from envy and resentment to frustration and regret. Robert Emmons, a leading gratitude researcher, has conducted multiple studies on the link between gratitude and well-being. His research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.   Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression. Grateful people are more likely to behave in a prosocial manner, even when others behave less kindly, according to a 2012 study by the University of Kentucky. Study participants who ranked higher on gratitude scales were less likely to retaliate against others, even when given negative feedback. They experienced more sensitivity and empathy toward other people and a decreased desire to seek revenge.   Grateful people sleep better. Writing in a gratitude journal improves sleep, according to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being. Spend just 15 minutes jotting down a few grateful sentiments before bed, and you may sleep better and longer.   Gratitude improves self-esteem. A 2014 study published in the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology found that gratitude increased athletes’ self-esteem, an essential component to optimal performance. Other studies have shown that gratitude reduces social comparisons. Rather than becoming resentful toward people who have more money or better jobs—a major factor in reduced self-esteem—grateful people are able to appreciate other people’s accomplishments.   Gratitude increases mental strength. For years, research has shown gratitude not only reduces stress, but it may also play a major role in overcoming trauma. A 2006 study published in Behavior Research and Therapy found that Vietnam War veterans with higher levels of gratitude experienced lower rates of post-traumatic stress disorder. A 2003 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that gratitude was a major contributor to resilience following the terrorist attacks on September 11. Recognizing all that you have to be thankful for —even during the worst times—fosters resilience. Another study appearing in Time Magazine gave the following benefits of having at attitude of gratitude: Gratitude can make you more patient Gratitude might improve your relationship Gratitude improves self-care Gratitude can help you sleep Gratitude may stop you from overeating Destination Disease always looks to the future for happiness.  I’ll be happy when I get married, when I graduate, when I retire……… “Sooner or later we must realize there is no [ideal destination], no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life outdistances us. So stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more ice cream, go barefoot more often, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more, and cry less. Life must be lived as we go along. ‘Relish the moment’ is a good motto.”  -Robert J. Hastings “Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts.” —Henri Frederic Amiel “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” —William Arthur Ward “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.” —Charles Dickens “None is more impoverished than the one who has no gratitude. Gratitude is a currency that we can mint for ourselves, and spend without fear of bankruptcy.” —Fred De Witt Van Amburgh Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:6-7 | NIV Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 | NIV References: 7 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude - Psychology Today 7 Surprising Health Benefits of Gratitude - Time Magazine Contact Craig

What if you could have an impact on the outcome of every event that happened in your life.  We will find out the formula for impacting the outcome of any event in this episode of “Your Encore Life”. You have heard about living your encore life, but you are frustrated or discouraged about whether you will ever get to a point where you can enjoy the freedom and satisfaction of being able to spend your time doing what you see is most valuable. You think: There are too many obstacles My current job or career won’t provide the flexibility I need My spouse, family, or friends would not be supportive…maybe they would think I’m crazy I won’t have the financial capability to do anything else Things keep happening unexpectedly that get in the way of progress I don’t have the time Excuses can make you feel better about you, but how is making them moving you toward your goals. I became frustrated with my career years ago, feeling I wasn’t doing what I was meant to do.  I made excuses about not having the time or the financial means to do anything about it.  That attitude effected my entire outlook and bled over into my personal life.  I didn’t feel like I had any control over my situation. But I was wrong. We may not have control over situations or events, but we do always have control over how we respond to them.  This all made sense when I heard a podcast by Kent Julian, where he talked about the formula E + R = O. He give credit for the formula to Dr. Jack Canfield. Events + Response = Outcome:  We may or may not have any control over the events or situations that arise, but we always have control over our response to those events, leading to the ability to have some impact on the outcome. Back to my story.  When I realized I that I needed to do something to start moving forward and stop feeling like a victim, I began reading great books and listening to podcasts and reading articles by thought leaders like John Maxwell, Michael Hyatt, John Ramstead, Seth Godin, and others. I realized that only by taking control of what I could….my response, would I be able to begin a trajectory toward where I knew I needed to be. How I turned a scary situation/event (prostate cancer) that I had no control over to something positive that has had a lasting impact, and how being in community impacted my response. Don’t Waste Your Cancer - John Piper Small Group Prayer Focus on being grateful for the blessings God has provided that I took for granted When you don’t take control of your response, the formula becomes E = O = V, the V being what I said I felt like I had become a minute ago, a VICTIM. Most people function this way by blaming the situation on other people or other factors. Blaming something or someone else may be valid, but is never productive. You can control your mindset or thinking, the way you communicate, the people you spend time with, the way you spend your free time.  You have control over that. You can control how you respond to any event.  Often you can impact the outcome significantly by pausing briefly before responding and asking yourself: Will my initial response ultimately impact the outcome positively or negatively. (ie. a situation where you feel you have been wronged, how might the way I respond out of anger make the situation worse, cause unintended collateral damage to others, or delay the healing process?)  Proverbs 29:11 says “Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end”. How can I respond or turn what appears to be a negative event into an opportunity to bless others and myself by growing from the experience? How can I respond to this positive event to magnify it so the joy and growth from the event spreads over others and results in long term growth and gratitude? Remember, stop and think before you respond. The best way I can ensure that my response to an event is thought out and appropriate it to take it to the Lord in prayer and ask Him for wisdom.  James 1:5 says “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Dr. Canfield says in an article that I reference in the show notes: “You have to gain control of your thoughts, your images, your dreams, daydreams, and your behavior. Everything you think, say, and do need to become intentional and aligned with your purpose, your values, and your goals. If you don’t like your outcomes, change your responses.” He goes on to say “Carefully choose how you respond to events – how you choose to interpret events, how you choose to think about and talk about what happened, how you choose to act — If you want to achieve better outcomes. Remember, you control your destiny … so make it a fantastic one!” You can control what you do once you finish this episode.  You can dismiss it and continue as you were, or you can follow this action item: Action Item:  As we prepare to begin our series on 20/20 vision for 2020, write down three situations or events that make you feel stuck or out of control, and write for each one how you can respond or change the way you already responded to change the outcome so you can move forward to leading your best encore life. Resource: Kent Julian - Live it Forward The Success Formula that Puts You in Control of Your Destiny - Dr. Jack Canfield Don’t Waste Your Cancer - John Piper Contact Craig

Learn what you can expect prior to or during a time of transition considering what's next from one who lived it. In this episode Mark talks about the transition from a long career to the next chapter of life, your encore life. He discusses the mix of emotions that comes with this transition along with strategies to move forward. Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement ofthe developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation.  Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners The Encore Career Handbook Marci Alboher

Join me as we have a conversation with Mark Ross, professional coach, artist, and encorepreneur. He brings to the table experience and wisdom that will benefit people in all stages of life, but particularly if you are at or near the “encore” stage of your life. Mark talks with us about his college and career path, the “smoldering discontent” that he felt in his early 50’s, and his journey to move from his 30 year career with a large municipality to becoming an “encorepreneur”. Mark Ross is owner of Next Thing Group, which helps midlife professionals transition into a new season of life and work.  He specializes in serving those who want to explore, launch or advance their Encore Career so they can enjoy the time freedom to pursue what matters most in their second half. Prior to this, Mark served in progressive leadership roles during his 30 year career with the City of Houston, culminating as the Assistant Parks and Recreation Director.  During his tenure he influenced and helped orchestrate the expansion and improvement ofthe developmental and operational systems to deliver services for the City of Houston’s park system. In his earlier career as an entrepreneur, Mark established a niche business to serve the architectural design market by providing custom design and fabrication of interior and exterior furnishings. He is a native Houstonian, holds an MBA from Texas Woman’s University, a Bachelor of Science in Landscape Architecture from Texas A&M University and is a registered Landscape Architect in Texas. He is also a certified Professional Life and Leadership Coach from the Professional Christian Coaching Institute and credentialed with the International Coaching Federation.  Mark has enjoyed being married for over 34 years to Jeannie from Jackson Mississippi and is the proud father of two grown daughters. He is active in his local church, is a native Houstonian, an artist, an avid walker, follows professional surfing, and loves pretty much anything that is process oriented. Resources: Mark Ross - Next Thing Group Mark’s Linkedin Profile Mark’s Facebook Page Dan Miller - 48 days.com Don’t Retire, REWIRE - Jeri Sedlar, Rick Miners The Encore Career Handbook Marci Alboher Contact Craig Listen on Apple Podcast Listen on Spotify Listen on Stitcher Listen on iHeart Radio

Tap into your why.  Think about your purpose.  Your why is the lifeblood of intentional living. Everything becomes more meaningful.  Why is your purpose, Way is your path. The why before the way your ability to make a difference comes more quickly. Do  Make small steps Knowing your why helps you know what to do and how to follow through. Allows you to focus more on others and less on yourself. gives you a confidence that is attractive to others.  Gives you security and sense of purpose. The more you live your why, the more you layer it. Strengths and purpose are connected. Your why is fuel for your strengths, and your strengths are the way to fulfill your why. The more you layer your why, the more impact is has on others.  Significance from knowing your why is like a snowball rolling down hill, it compounds. Your impact will keep increasing over time. Keeps you in the game longer.  Could it be that people retire and lose their purpose, their why, their reason to live. Don’t stay stuck until you figure out your why.  Sometimes your why will become clear as you move forward. Questions to help find your why: What do you cry about, what breaks your heart? What do you sing about, make you happy, jump for joy, feeds your soul? What do you dream about?  What if……?  Don’t be long on dreams and short on action. Simon Sinek: Golden Circle  Why…How….What - backwards from typical What…How…Why Why:  What is your purpose, your call, your belief…why do you exist? “People don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.” Personal Story: Men at church coming together to be there for me as a young teenager who just lost his father. What do I remember, what do others remember about my dad who I lost 46 years ago.  Not his status, money, cars, or other worldly things.  I remember him as one who loved and cared for his family, one who cared for his church and community and served both well.  People loved him because of his relationships, that’s it.  How will people remember you? What do you cry about, what breaks your heart? What do you sing about, make you happy, jump for joy, feeds your soul? What do you dream about? Action Item:  Answer the 3 questions.  Use the writing process to discover your answers and go with it.  It can be a messy process and there is no right or wrong.  Just write away. John Maxwell - “Intentional Living: Choosing a Life That Matters” Ted Talks with Simon Sinek: How Great Leaders Inspire Action Contact Craig Listen on Apple Podcast Listen on Spotify Listen on Stitcher Listen on iHeart Radio

What will the next chapter of your story be? What do you need to do to make sure you are the author of the story? What do you need to do to make your story one of significance? As we continue our discussion about intentional living from our last episode, Let's talk about those questions as we continue our journey to our best encore life. Welcome to episode 3 of “Your Encore Life’ with Craig Coile. Change your mindset Put yourself in the story…take action (Here’s to the crazy ones) Put significance in your story…Do things out of comfort zone, take action. Start where you are. Put strengths in story. Stop trying and start doing. Act on what you value, find your voice.  What makes your heart sing, what brings tears to your eyes?  Actions aligned with who you are. Significance isn’t easy, it can be messy. Invite others to be part of your story. All stories include wins and losses, joys and sorrows. From an Apple Computer commercial in 1997: “Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.” Good intentions aren’t enough. It must be followed with intentional living.  Move from wanting to doing. Living intentionally is the bridge to significance. Seven Benefits of Intentional Living Asking questions and prioritizing “What is significant in my life”?  Adding value to people. Motivates us to take immediate action to move toward significance. “Do it now” Get into the game. Challenges us to find creative ways to achieve significance. Energizes us to give our best effort to accomplish significance.  Aim too high and miss, but aim too low and hit.  Unintentional is not aiming at all and never hit or miss.  Golfing w/o a hole. Unleashes the power of significance within us. Inspires us to make every day count.  John Wooden “Make every day your masterpiece”. Secret of success is to live every day accomplishing a step toward significance. Encourages us to finish well.  Legacy Each journey will be different. Start no matter who you are, where you are, or what you have. 1. Begin by doing ordinary things extraordinarily. Take that first step. Mother Theresa said “some of the greatest works ever done have been performed from sick beds and prison cell. Be significant from wherever you are 2. Start with your one thing.  What do you do better than everybody else?  What are your strengths? 3. Watch your words.  Embrace words that encourage you, like I can, I will, yes.  Eliminate me, I can’t, I quit. 4. Start by making small changes.  Embrace incremental change. 5. Believe big…in: -yourself -your mission/dream -your people -Your God Jeremiah 29:11 New International Version (NIV) 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Ephesians 3:20 New International Version (NIV) 20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, Start small and believe big. Action Item:  Write out what you want to accomplish in your encore life. Does it give you a sense of significance?  What single small action could you take today, this week to start rewriting your own story. Write it down.  Remember to believe big enough to excite you, to make your heart sing, and big enough to realize you need others to come alongside.  Big enough to need God to carry you to your dream. Resources: John Maxwell - “Intentional Living: Choosing a Life That Matters” Here’s to the Crazy Ones Bible Gateway Contact Craig Brian Dixon: “Start With Your People

002- What will the next chapter of your story be? What do you need to do to make sure you are the author of the story? What do you need to do to make your story one of significance and avoid having regrets? Let’s talk about those questions as we continue our journey to our best encore life. Welcome to episode 2 of “Your Encore Life’ with Craig Coile.   For show notes  and to leave a comment, go to http://craigcoilecoaching.com/encore/2  

Welcome to the very first episode of "Your Encore Life". I’m Craig Coile, an entrepreneur, or more specifically a solopreneur podcaster, coach, speaker, and trainer who is creating, living, and loving his encore life.  Your “life’s encore” can occur at any point where significance becomes more important than success.  Topics this show will cover are designed to help you discover your talents and strengths, passion and calling, and live your life intentionally to create your life’s best encore.