Conflict Skills

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Learn Conflict Resolution skills from an Accredited Mediator & Dispute Resolution Practitioner. In this podcast, I provide practical tools to deal with conflict. Navigate situations with confidence so that you can resolve issues and shift things forward.

Simon Goode

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    • May 14, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 28m AVG DURATION
    • 76 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Conflict Skills

    3 Levels of Active Listening: Step-by-Step Masterclass for Better Conversations

    Play Episode Listen Later May 14, 2025 22:24 Transcription Available


    In this episode, Simon Goode breaks down active listening into three levels: building initial connection through body language and basic responses, using coregulation and summarizing to help others feel truly heard, and practicing genuine curiosity to foster reciprocal change in conversations. He shares practical tips, like using open and closed questions, mirroring, and mindful summaries, to improve everyday listening skills. Simon also emphasizes the power of approaching conversations with an open, nonjudgmental mindset to deepen understanding and drive positive change in conflict situations.---------------TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Improving Listening Skills Strategies05:48 Effective Distress Listening Techniques08:48 Effective Listening with Open Questions10:58 Effective Communication Through Mirroring13:10 Summary Options: Short or Long18:49 Embracing Subjective Narratives in Conflict20:14 Levels of Active Listening SkillsClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailSupport the showThank you so much for listening! I'd love to know what you think and connect. website: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Tools to Effectively Digest and Process Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later May 6, 2025 42:10 Transcription Available


    In this episode, Simon Goode explores how we can "digest" conflict experiences by using practical self-regulation techniques in the moment, immediately after, and over the long term. He shares tools like mindful breathing, multisensory walks, journaling, and gratitude exercises to help restore balance and process stressful encounters. Simon emphasizes that everyone's needs are different, encouraging listeners to experiment with various strategies to find what works best for them.--------------- TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Mind-Body Self-Regulation Transformation04:32 Digesting Conflict: Strategies and Tools06:25 Navigating Advice Sensitively11:00 "Understanding Sensory and Internal Perception"15:33 Post-Conflict Reset Strategies18:19 The 20 Sigh Method21:04 Simple Mindfulness Techniques23:24 "Emotional Impact of Childhood Sounds"29:32 Mindfulness Habits: Overcoming Doubts32:01 "Benefits of Pen-and-Paper Journaling"36:05 Gratitude: A Path to Positivity39:10 "Staying Calm: Practical Strategies"41:50 Podcast Farewell MessageClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailSupport the showwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    3 Steps To Rebuild Trust After Workplace Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 21, 2025 23:40 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode explores the challenge of rebuilding trust after a conflict, particularly in workplace settings. He outlines a three-phase approach: clarifying expectations, facilitating resolution through empathy and structured reflection, and maintaining positive momentum with ongoing feedback. Throughout, Simon shares practical tools and strategies for managers, team leaders, and colleagues to support trust-building and navigate post-conflict dynamics effectively.--------------TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Trust Erosion After Conflict03:05 Rebuilding Trust: A Three-Phase Approach06:28 Focus on Short-Term Conflict Management09:43 Empathetic Listening Without Solutions12:56 Restorative Justice and Empathy Guidelines16:54 Breaking Crisis Cycle for Trust20:58 Cultivating Positive Work Relationships22:32 Contact & Support the PodcastClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailSupport the showwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    The Hubris Of Conflict Resolution Expertise

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2025 30:00 Transcription Available


    In episode 73 of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode discusses the challenges and complexities of being labeled a conflict resolution expert, sharing personal experiences of feeling overwhelmed by conflicts despite training when the situation was calling on resources that weren't available. Simon explores the unrealistic expectations we often place on ourselves and delves into how our brain's response to stress can complicate conflict management. Throughout the episode, Simon reflects on self-care strategies and the importance of balancing different aspects of self to effectively navigate and respond to conflict.00:00 Overcoming Challenges Amidst Chaos03:53 Conflict Confidence & Work-Life Realities08:11 Driving Stress Impacts Email Writing13:24 "Breaking Digital Dependency"17:03 "Forgiving Audience Amid Tech Issues"18:03 Five Aspects of Self-Care23:10 Balancing Self for Conflict Resolution25:30 Balancing Self for Present Awareness28:09 Self-Calming StrategiesClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailSupport the showwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Managing Conflict When You're Tired: Practical Strategies for Low Energy Challenges

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 2, 2025 31:15 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode shares five tips for managing conflict when you're tired. He discusses how tiredness affects our thoughts, emotions, and behavior, leading to a higher likelihood of conflict, and provides strategies like slowing down, strategically adjusting timing, and self-regulating frequently. Simon also touches on the importance of managing expectations for ourselves and with others when our energy levels are low.--------------------00:00 Managing Conflict While Tired06:03 Fatigue Impairs Decision-Making07:09 "Strong Emotions: Not Overreacting"12:38 "Slow Down for Clarity"13:31 "Calm Through Slower Actions"16:59 Managing Stress and Energy Levels21:27 Self-Regulation Strategies for Meetings25:57 Managing Fatigue and Productivity29:05 Managing Tiredness in Conflict30:18 Engage with "Conflict Skills" PodcastClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailSupport the showwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    5 Tips To Overcome Conflict Avoidance and Improve Assertiveness

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2025 42:16 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, I provide 5 useful tools for individuals who are conflict avoidant, providing strategies to help them manage conflicts more effectively in various relationships. He emphasizes understanding the reasoning behind conflict avoidance, offers coaching tools for team leaders and managers, and highlights techniques like goal clarification and utilizing the six sources of influence. The episode is aimed at both conflict avoidant individuals and those supporting them, with practical advice on self-regulation and adjusting communication tactics to improve assertiveness.Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    How to Manage Emotions in Performance Management Conversations

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 10, 2025 18:20 Transcription Available


    In today's episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast with host Simon Goode, we dive into the crucial topic of managing emotions during performance management meetings. Simon, a seasoned professional mediator, addresses the challenges often faced in these meetings, especially when conflict escalates. He explores various de-escalation strategies tailored for performance management conversations by focusing on five key aspects: certainty, relatedness, autonomy, status, and fairness. Simon also discusses the importance of balancing assertiveness with empathy, offering step-by-step insights into how to maintain composure through both verbal and nonverbal communication. Whether you're aiming to foster collaboration or need to take a more direct approach, Simon's guidance in this episode provides valuable tools to help navigate performance-related discussions effectively. Tune in to learn how to keep these crucial conversations more productive and less contentious.--------------------EPISODE SUMMARY: Understanding Performance Management ConflictsPerformance management processes as potentially adversarial.Natural combativeness and defensive responses.Approach to de-escalation in performance management settings.Balancing assertiveness and empathy.De-escalation Skills and Their ApplicationOverview of five aspects: certainty, relatedness, autonomy, status, and fairness.Individual context-based approach to either assertiveness or empathy.Five options for responding to conflict: competing, compromising, accommodating, avoiding, collaborating.De-escalation Strategy: CertaintyProviding certainty through information about what to expect.Discussing behavior, consequences, and facts.Transparency and specificity in addressing issues.De-escalation Strategy: RelatednessDemonstrating understanding and empathy.Allowing questions and pausing to slow the pace.Addressing emotions and processing time.De-escalation Strategy: AutonomyGiving a sense of control over the meeting and issue.Offering choices and soliciting input on problem-solving.De-escalation Strategy: StatusMaking the person feel important.Acknowledging contributions and separating issue from personal attributes.De-escalation Strategy: FairnessAllowing responses and questions.Implementing transparent processes and outlining change expectations.Nonverbal Aspects of De-escalationVoice tone, volume, and pace adjustments.Facial expression and body language considerations.Maintaining a composed presence to influence meeting dynamics.Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    The 7 Hermetic Principles: Enhancing Relationship Dynamics Through Ancient Wisdom

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 3, 2025 28:20


    In this episode, host Simon Goode explores the seven Hermetic principles derived from the teachings of Hermes and how they can be applied to conflict resolution in relationships. He delves into each principle, such as mentalism, correspondence, and vibration, discussing their relevance and offering insights on how these ancient concepts can help individuals understand and influence their interpersonal dynamics. The episode encourages listeners to reflect on how their perceptions and behaviors shape relationships and offers perspectives on finding balance and growth within personal and professional conflict scenarios.-------------Show Notes: The Seven Hermetic PrinciplesMentalismUniverse as a mental creationTheories of the mind: materialism, dualism, idealismReality shaped by perception and thoughtThe concept's applications to relationshipsCorrespondence"As above, so below" philosophyExternal manifestations of internal statesPersonal experiences with anxiety and depressionPractical implications in communicationVibrationEverything is in constant motionDynamics of relationships changing over timeAvoid carrying past issues into present relationshipsPolarityDuality in everything: good and bad, helpful and not helpfulChallenges as opportunities for growthSeeking balance in relationships and conflictsRhythmEbb and flow of relationships and life cyclesRecognizing and learning from relationship patternsStrategies to manage relationship cyclesCause and EffectActions and reactions in relationshipsEmpathy towards others' behavior stemming from past experiencesImpact of personal actions on relationshipsGenderMasculine and feminine aspects in everythingBalancing creativity and responsiveness in conflictsApplication to leadership and decision-makingClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Five Strategies to Say No - Firmly and Respectfully

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2025 22:55 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host and professional mediator, Simon Goode, delves into the art of saying 'no' with confidence and kindness. Reflecting on personal experiences, including morning challenges with his son and client demands at work, Simon explores five practical strategies to effectively communicate a refusal without escalating tension. Whether it's using tactical phrasing like "this isn't the time" or suggesting constructive alternatives, the episode provides listeners with actionable techniques to maintain harmony and assertiveness in both personal and professional settings. Additionally, Simon offers a bonus tip on managing persistent requests, ensuring you'll be equipped to handle even the most determined individuals with composure. This episode is an essential listen for anyone looking to master the delicate balance of saying no, a critical skill in managing everyday conflicts. Tune in to enhance your communication toolkit and navigate conflicts with greater ease.Tomestamp overview00:00 Role Modeling Calm Communication06:10 Choosing Between Soft or Assertive 'No'08:18 Streamlining Communication Processes Now10:25 Conditional Approval for Request15:57 List Management and Authority Dynamics18:31 "Strategies for Resolving Persistence"21:21 Breaking the Cycle of Repetitive DiscussionsClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Understanding Cumulative Stress: How It Fuels Workplace Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 17, 2025 27:10 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode discusses the cumulative effects of stress on workplace conflict and the interconnection between work and personal life stressors. He highlights how stress can negatively impact our capacity to handle conflict and offers strategies for managing stress, including during and after conflicts, as well as over the long term. Goode also invites listeners to share their experiences and stay updated on his upcoming online course focused on managing workplace conflict.-------------------------------------------TIMESTAMP OVERVIEW:00:00 Rethinking Work-Life Balance03:45 Work Stress Affects Personal Life07:39 Navigating Work-Life Stress Management11:29 Shifting from Black-and-White Thinking15:28 "Stress Response: Fight or Flight"19:39 Stress Management: Breathing and Mindfulness23:49 Managing Stress Through Life Tweaks26:21 Announcement: Self-Paced Online CourseClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Strategies for Managing Cognitive Dissonance in the Workplace

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 2, 2025 27:25


    Discover how to handle workplace biases effectively with actionable strategies to strengthen your conflict resolution skills. In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, Simon Goode explores cognitive dissonance, its impact on decision-making, and biases such as confirmation bias, selective exposure, and the ostrich effect. Learn practical techniques for effective communication, fostering collaboration, and offering constructive criticism while navigating conflicts with colleagues or supervisors. Whether you're dealing with tough workplace debates, refining your mediation approach, or improving your effective listening skills, this episode is packed with insights designed to enhance your professional relationships. Watch until the end to master debate tactics and uncover tools that help you set boundaries and address biases constructively. Perfect for anyone looking to grow in workplace mediation or improve interactions in professional and personal settings. Subscribe now for more conflict resolution tips and resources!#nonviolentcommunication #affinitybias #professionaldevelopment #implicitbiasatwork #howtostopbiasatworkCHAPTERS:00:00 - Introduction to Cognitive Dissonance00:22 - Understanding Cognitive Dissonance04:17 - Exploring Confirmation Bias11:10 - The Concept of Selective Exposure15:14 - The Ostrich Effect Explained19:08 - Understanding the Backfire Effect21:40 - Strategies to Manage the Backfire Effect26:16 - Conclusion and Wrap-UpPapers:Festinger, L. (1957). “A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance.” Stanford University Press.Nickerson, R. S. (1998). “Confirmation Bias: A Ubiquitous Phenomenon in Many Guises.” Review of General Psychology.Nyhan, B., & Reifler, J. (2010). “When Corrections Fail: The Persistence of Political Misperceptions.” Political Behavior. Link Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    5 Debate Tactics To Avoid With Friends

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 27, 2025 28:34 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode discusses five online debate tactics that are ineffective when used with friends and family, and offers alternatives for better communication. He emphasises the importance of avoiding aggressive behaviors like interrupting, applying pressure, and using sarcasm, suggesting instead to listen respectfully, reduce pressure, and acknowledge differing viewpoints. The episode aims to help listeners improve their conflict resolution skills in personal relationships by reflecting on Simon's own past mistakes and learning from them.--------------------Online Debate Tactics That Don't Work (With Friends & Family)Interrupting and Controlling the ConversationHow it manifests in conversations (e.g., talking over, steering the conversation)Results and outcomes of using this tacticPersonal anecdote about Simon's usage of this tacticApplying PressureDifferent ways pressure is applied (e.g., fixed choice questions, not letting thoughts form)Outcomes and the other person's typical reactionsExamples that illustrate pressure applicationSimon's discussion on workplace application vs. personal contextsHumor and RidiculeUse of sarcasm and humor in debatesExamples of sarcastic ridiculePsychological impact on social survival and tribe dynamicsRisks associated with this tactic in emotionally charged conversationsStraw ManningDefinition and explanation of the straw man argumentExamples of straw manningHow it causes disengagementSimon's personal history with this tacticWalking AwaySituations where walking away might be seen as losing or ending the debateImpact of unfinished business with friendsImportance of long-term relationship dynamicsEffective Strategies for Managing Debates and DisagreementsAllowing Space and Letting Them SpeakApologizing for interruptionsFocusing on active listeningMethods to signal attention and readiness to listenReducing PressureGiving control over the timing and location of the conversationAllowing autonomy and choiceExamples of reducing perceived pressureRespect and DeferenceBeing overly deferential and respectful in both language and behaviorTreating the other person's perspective with seriousness and importanceSituational examples of applying respect and deferenceSteel ManningDefinition of steel manningTechniques to present the other person's argument in the best possible lightBenefits of acknowledging the internal logic of others' perspectivesLeaving Room for Continued DialogueConfirming the opportunity for future discussionsSuggestions for ending conversations on good termsValidating different views without pressure to resolve immediatelyClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Workplace Conflict Analysis: Tools for Leaders and Professionals

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 20, 2025 34:11 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, Simon Goode discusses his approach to analyzing workplace conflict, emphasizing the importance of understanding the self and the interplay of thoughts, feelings, perceptions, behaviors, and the body. He explains the framework he uses for conflict resolution, which includes self-regulation, de-escalation, understanding structural elements, and addressing data, value, and interest conflicts. Simon also highlights the importance of empathetic questioning and assertiveness while providing various strategies for managing and resolving conflicts effectively.Approach to Analyzing Workplace ConflictTypical approach as a workplace mediatorApplication for leadership rolesUse in scenarios with limited information (one side of the story)Coaching others on conflict awarenessFramework vs. personal subjective experiencesListener Feedback RequestDifferent formats for podcast content (framework/theory, personal perspective, case studies)Feedback methods (email, positive reviews)Self-Analysis and Conflict5 aspects of the self derived from Buddhism:Thoughts (cognition and the narrative we tell ourselves)Feelings (emotions and subjective physical responses)Perception (sensory information and attention)Behavior (actions and volition)Body (physical state and presence)Interconnectedness of these aspects during conflictShort-term self-regulation strategies for each aspectRelationship Conflict LayerInteraction between self and the other personSteps for de-escalation using the 5 aspects of othersStructural ConflictDecision-making and communication dynamicsAdjustments to communication modes and frequencyWho is involved in communicationLevels of formalityFollow-up processes and information sharingDrivers of ConflictThree main aspects that drive conflict:Data Conflict (misunderstandings and differences in information)Value Conflict (clash of principles, beliefs, and priorities)Interest Conflict (differing desires and goals)Setting Goals in Conflict ResolutionDefining effective working relationshipsMinimum viable working relationshipSteps to Develop Conflict Resolution PlanSelf-RegulationKeeping oneself calm using the 5 aspects of self.De-escalationStrategies to calm down the other person.Raising the IssueLanguage and approach to initiate conflict discussion.EmpathyQuestions and techniques to understand the other perspective.AssertivenessDefining boundaries and knowing the bottom line.Next StepsDeciding on a specific conflict resolution strategy (negotiation, collaboration, etc.)Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Slow Down, Buddy! How To Handle Speeding Neighbours

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 7, 2025 30:43


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into a neighborhood dispute between Kevin and Jim over speeding in a residential area. Through a case study, Simon explores the underlying causes of the conflict, offers mediation tips, and stresses the importance of fostering a collaborative, future-focused dialogue. Listeners are encouraged to subscribe, leave reviews, and suggest future topics via simongoode.com or email podcast@simongoode.com.---------Simon Goode is a professional mediator and host of the Conflict Skills Podcast, dedicated to providing free resources and tools for effectively handling conflict. With a focus on both workplace disputes and personal disagreements, Simon leverages his expertise to offer practical advice and real-life case studies. Passionate about conflict resolution, he even draws inspiration from his own neighborhood for content, ensuring that his advice is grounded and relatable. If you're looking for strategies to manage conflict, Simon's podcast is an invaluable resource.-----------Timestamps:00:00 Neighbors in conflict over speeding driver issue.05:51 Conflict isn't about data accuracy; it's subjective.08:57 Values conflict primarily concerns safety and understanding.10:28 Balancing safety and responsibility through cooperative solutions.14:52 Autonomy leads to control; confrontation causes tension.16:35 Perceptions differ from projected communication strategies.22:26 Planning conversation responses for different outcomes.25:30 Kevin apologizes but provokes Jim with actions.26:50 Neighbors' feud creates tension, unease, and awkwardness.30:15 Share podcast with someone facing neighbor conflict.Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    ADHD & Workplace Conflict: Practical Management Strategies

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 5, 2024 80:41


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into managing ADHD in the workplace. The discussion is structured around understanding ADHD symptoms, identifying triggers, and implementing effective strategies for managers and team leaders. Simon highlights the need for a balanced approach in providing support and maintaining workplace standards, while also offering practical advice for leveraging the strengths of employees with ADHD.-----------------------------Managing ADHD in the Workplace: Strategies for Smoother Team DynamicsExploring Episode 63 of Conflict Skills Podcast with Simon GoodeConflict Skills Podcast is your go-to resource for tackling workplace conflicts with finesse. Hosted by Simon Goode, this podcast specializes in various conflict scenarios, offering insights and actionable strategies. In episode 63, Simon dives into a particularly nuanced subject: ADHD in the workplace. This blog post builds upon Simon's discussion and aims to provide further clarity on managing ADHD to foster a harmonious and productive work environment.Understanding ADHD Symptoms in the WorkplaceSimon starts the episode by highlighting the primary symptoms of ADHD that can affect workplace dynamics. These symptoms include:Inattention:People with ADHD may have difficulty staying focused on a single task, making it challenging to complete assignments on time.Impulsivity:This can manifest as hasty decision-making or interrupting colleagues, leading to friction.Hyperactivity:While less common in adults, this can still result in restlessness and difficulty staying seated or quiet during long meetings.Emotional Dysregulation:Individuals may experience strong emotional reactions that can escalate conflicts.Executive Function Challenges:Problems with planning, time management, and organizational skills are common, potentially leading to misunderstandings and missed deadlines.Understanding these symptoms is the first step in addressing the challenges they present.Triggers That Exacerbate ADHD SymptomsSimon underscores several triggers that can amplify ADHD symptoms, making workplace conflicts more likely. These include:Stressful Deadlines:Tight schedules can worsen ADHD symptoms, such as impulsivity and emotional dysregulation.Unstructured Environments:A lack of clear guidelines and expectations can make it difficult for individuals with ADHD to manage their responsibilities effectively.Sensory Overload:A noisy or cluttered workspace can be particularly distracting, exacerbating issues with inattention.Recognizing these triggers enables managers and team leaders to create environments that minimize stress and distractions.Effective Managerial StrategiesBalancing flexibility and consistency is crucial when managing employees with ADHD. Simon offers several strategies to help managers maintain this balance:Recognize Patterns:Understand the unique ways ADHD symptoms manifest in each employee. Tailor support strategies to individual needs.Prepare for Interruptions:Implement procedures that anticipate and manage disruptions, such as shorter, more frequent meetings to accommodate attention spans.De-escalate Conflicts:Develop tactics for calming tense situations, such as taking breaks during heated debates.Leverage Strengths:Identify and utilize the unique skills and perspectives that individuClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Moving On After Workplace Conflict: Steps To Deal With Unresolved Feelings

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2024 46:07


    In Episode 62 of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into the complexities of "moving on" from conflicts, offering insights inspired by a listener's review about unresolved workplace issues. The episode explores the nuances of understanding individual perspectives on resolution, breaking down five types of apologies, and emphasizing the significance of trust and mindfulness. Simon also introduces Robert Greene's concept of "ascending the mountain" to gain broader clarity and shares personal elements to consider in the process of moving forward.----------------------- SHOW NOTES:IntroductionOverview of the Conflict Skills PodcastHost: Simon GoodeFocus: Resources for handling conflicts in various contextsEpisode InspirationListener's review about unresolved workplace issuesDealing with Unresolved ConflictsSituations of Unequal ResolutionOne person feels resolved, the other remains upsetVice versa: The importance of aligning both partiesApologies and Moving Conversations ForwardFive Types of ApologiesIntroduction to various forms of apologiesStructured apologies as a tool for resolutionRobert Greene's "Ascending the Mountain" ConceptOverview from "The Daily Laws"Broader perspective over timeSeeing situations more clearlyPersonal Elements in Moving OnFive Key Personal ElementsCognition: How we think about the conflictEmotion: Our feelings about the conflictPerception: How we interpret the conflictAction: Steps we take toward resolutionPhysical Body: Physical responses and stressesMoving On vs. Moving ForwardDiscomfort with the term "moving on" in contexts of griefSuggestion of "moving forward" as a more supportive termThe Importance of Trust in Moving OnFour Pillars of TrustCompetence: Trust in skills and abilitiesIntegrity: Trust in honesty and moralsBenevolence: Trust in goodwill and kindnessPredictability: Trust in consistent behaviorAcknowledgments and Structured ApologiesRole of acknowledgments in the conflict resolution processFive types of apologiesImportance and implementationManaging Personal FeelingsStrategies for struggling with moving onAltering perceptionsManaging emotions through mindfulnessConclusionEncouragement to reflect on personal approaches to moving onInsights into expectations and assumptionsInvitation for listener feedback and future topic suggestionsHighlighting the importance of reviews for podcast visibility--------------------------TIMESTAMPS:00:00 Guidance on moving forward, apologies, trust-building.05:14 Viewing change from a holistic self-perspective.09:07 Accept differences, maintain boundaries, foster working relationships.12:54 Rebuilding trust: Clear expectations and predictability.17:25 Prepare for impact, then rebuild trust collaboratively.21:18 Making up for mistakes with gestures.23:34 Seeking reconciliation, offering support, moving forward.27:32 Consider contexts, don't take actions personally.31:01 Manage emotions deliberately using imaginative perspClick here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Six Steps to Effectively Analyze and Resolve Workplace Conflicts

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2024 47:30


    In today's episode, we're diving deep into the art of analyzing workplace conflict situations. Join me as we walk through a strategic, step-by-step toolkit designed to help you better understand and resolve conflicts at work. We'll explore key topics such as self-awareness, the role of goal setting and understanding your circle of control, and the five types of conflict you may encounter. Additionally, we'll shed light on the Insight Discovery model for grasping personality differences and break down various conflict modes like competing, collaborating, and accommodating.This episode is packed with insights on how to calm your physical stress responses through effective breathing techniques, and why strategic thought always trumps knee-jerk reactions. Whether you're a manager, team member, or just someone eager to improve your conflict resolution skills, this episode has something valuable for you. Let's embark on this journey together and transform our approach to workplace conflicts. And as always, I encourage you to reach out with your feedback at podcast@simongood.com. Stay tuned!Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Navigating Workplace Conflict: Case Study Analysis & Mediation Strategies

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2024 37:53


    In Episode 60 of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode analyzes three detailed case studies of workplace conflicts, offering strategies to address issues such as office music preferences, phone usage during retail shifts, and chronic absenteeism. Each case is examined through various levels of intervention, emphasizing the importance of open communication, empathy, and collaborative problem-solving. Listeners are encouraged to apply these insights to foster healthier and more productive workplace environments.Click here to send me a quick message via FanMailwebsite: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Facilitating a HR Mediation With Staff: Essential Answers to Common Questions

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 22, 2024 54:26


    Click here to send us a DMWelcome back to the Conflict Skills Podcast! I'm your host, Simon Goode, and today we're diving into one of the most requested topics—workplace mediation. Episode 59 is all about answering your frequently asked questions on how to effectively mediate conflicts within the workplace.We'll explore the key aspects of ensuring a fair mediation process, from addressing power imbalances to determining the suitability based on safety, willingness, and capacity. Whether you're dealing with minor disputes or major conflicts, we'll cover the varying levels of formality—be it a simple meeting, a facilitated conversation, or full-scale mediation.I'll walk you through the essential role of a mediator, how to establish clear ground rules, and strategies for managing high emotions using de-escalation techniques. We'll also discuss how managers can promote mediation, handle refusals, and what steps to take if mediation doesn't resolve the issue.Remember, not all conflicts are best suited for mediation, especially in cases involving clear breaches of conduct or when parties are unwilling or incapable of participating. Stay tuned for some insightful tips and practical advice to enhance your conflict resolution toolkit. Plus, don't miss our upcoming episode where we'll delve into real-world case studies!Let's get started!website: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    How To Run A Mediation Between Manager & Staff Member

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 17, 2024 54:50


    Click here to send us a DMWelcome to the Conflict Skills Podcast, where we provide you with crucial tools and insights for effectively managing both workplace and personal conflicts. I'm your host, Simon Goode, a professional mediator, and today we dive into a particularly challenging yet essential topic: How to run a mediation between a manager and a staff member.In Episode 56, we'll outline the entire mediation process—from determining its appropriateness to conducting pre-mediation meetings and managing the joint session. We'll also explore critical techniques like creating a balanced environment for contributions, de-escalating conflicts, and ensuring thorough follow-ups. Whether you're a mediator, manager, or team member, this episode will equip you with actionable steps to foster resolution and understanding in your workplace.Stay tuned to explore how structured mediation can transform workplace dynamics and contribute to a more harmonious environment. Don't forget to engage with us through comments, feedback, or emails at podcast@simongood.com. Let's get started!website: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    How to Turn Down Work Invitations Respectfully

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2024 15:49


    Send us a textIn today's episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, we're focusing on a challenge many of us face: how to say no to invitations from colleagues without causing offense. We'll delve into effective strategies to decline invitations gracefully, keeping relationships intact, particularly when these relationships are crucial to your work or personal life. I'll share insights on managing five key factors—status, autonomy, certainty, fairness, and relatedness—to help you communicate your decline in a way that is respectful and clear. Whether it's a social event or a professional project, tune in and learn how to handle these tricky situations smoothly. If you find our tips helpful, don't forget to subscribe or leave a review. Let's get started!website: simongoode.com email: podcast@simongoode.com

    Negotiating With Your Boss For a Raise: Five Effective Approaches to Try

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 11, 2024 21:41 Transcription Available


    Send us a textIn this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into five strategic approaches for negotiating a raise with your boss, focusing on various conflict types: data, interest, values, structure, and relationship. Through professional examples and personal anecdotes, Simon illustrates how to effectively prepare for these conversations.

    Navigating Morning Chaos: Conflict Management Tips for Parents

    Play Episode Play 30 sec Highlight Listen Later Aug 22, 2024 42:07


    Send us a Text Message.In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into the common struggles parents face during morning routines and shares strategies to ease the chaos. He highlights the importance of maintaining a calm environment to prevent stress and conflict, emphasizing how morning turmoil can affect one's emotional state throughout the day. Through techniques like the GROW coaching model, Simon offers practical advice for fostering responsibility and problem-solving skills in children.

    The Best Questions to De-Escalate Any Situation

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 12, 2024 17:36 Transcription Available


    Send us a Text Message.In today's episode, we're diving into an essential toolkit for anyone dealing with conflict: the best questions for de-escalating tense situations. Drawing from my experiences mediating deeply entrenched conflicts and working in high-stress environments like youth crisis centers, I'll share specific types of questions that can help lower the temperature and foster more productive conversations. We'll explore how to open dialogues with neutral questions, how to prioritize urgent needs, and how to maintain empathy and understanding throughout the process. Plus, I'll touch on the importance of tone, body language, and offering a sense of control to the other party. Whether you're managing workplace disputes or personal conflicts, this episode provides actionable insights to help you navigate tricky interactions with confidence. Let's get started!

    Emotional Awareness: Key to Managing Workplace Conflicts and Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2024 16:15


    Send us a Text Message.In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into the importance of developing emotional awareness in navigating workplace conflicts. He explains a structured approach encompassing four stages: self-awareness, self-regulation, awareness of others, and the ability to influence others. Simon also provides practical tips and coaching questions for both individuals and leaders to enhance emotional intelligence and improve workplace relationships.

    Managing Client Scope Creep: Conflict Resolution Techniques for Success

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 29, 2024 24:01 Transcription Available


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into the issue of client scope creep, particularly in the construction and design sectors, and provides five conflict resolution strategies to address it. The strategies include addressing data, structural, interest, values, and relationship conflicts, offering listeners tools for effective negotiation and clear communication. Simon emphasizes the importance of understanding these different types of conflicts to better manage and prevent scope creep, ultimately fostering healthier client relationships

    Help - I Inherited A Dysfunctional Team At Work!

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 22, 2024 34:01


    In Episode 51 of the Conflict Skills Podcast, Simon Goode provides a comprehensive guide on inheriting and managing a dysfunctional team, emphasizing the importance of starting with low-stakes interventions and understanding different types of conflicts. He elaborates on the phases of team development, the emotional toll on team members, and the pivotal role of self-care for leaders. With a focus on gradual, compassionate, and firm approaches, Simon shares his own experiences and offers practical advice for long-term team improvement.

    Self-Coaching in Stressful Conflict: Using The GROW Model

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 16, 2024 25:14


    Welcome to Episode 50 of the Conflict Skills Podcast! I'm your host, Simon Goode, a professional mediator here to guide you through the complexities of conflict management. In today's milestone episode, we dive into a unique application of the renowned GROW model—Goals, Reality, Options, and Way Forward—not for coaching others, but for self-care and avoiding burnout in the midst of conflict. Drawing inspiration from John Whitmore's influential book "Coaching for Performance," we'll explore how you can use this framework to navigate negative thought patterns, manage stress, and improve your well-being. Whether you're dealing with workplace disputes, family tensions, or simply trying to unwind after a hectic day, this episode offers valuable insights to help you regain control and foster a healthy mind. So, tune in and learn how to apply the GROW model for your own self-coaching journey. Let's get started!

    5 Top Conflict Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 3, 2024 18:55


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into five common conflict mistakes, beginning with the damaging impact of the phrase "calm down." He explores why such phrases are often counterproductive and provides alternative strategies for more effective communication. Simon also underscores the importance of maintaining a self-aware and collaborative approach to conflict resolution, avoiding quick fixes and focusing on genuine empathetic engagement.

    How Conflict Escalates Stress: Managing Your Response To Threat

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 10, 2024 18:32


    Why is conflict so stressful? Join me as we explore the various factors that contribute to the immense stress caused by conflict, whether it's in our personal relationships or workplace interactions. We'll discuss the physiological impacts, why our brains perceive conflict as a threat, and how this connects to our ancient survival mechanisms. I'll also share practical insights on managing stress, recognizing negative patterns, and implementing healthy self-care strategies to help you feel more composed and in control during conflict. If you're looking to better understand the roots of conflict-related stress and discover ways to cope effectively, this episode is for you. So, hit that subscribe button and let's get started!

    How To Deal With Staff Using Phones - Team Leader Listener Question

    Play Episode Listen Later May 28, 2024 28:00


    Listener Question - Staff Using Phone At Work. In this episode, host Simon Goode tackles the common workplace issue of staff using their phones on the job. Through a detailed analysis of a manager's dilemma with a younger staff member repeatedly using their phone at an after-school care center, Simon explores various conflict resolution strategies. From clarifying expectations to navigating value conflicts and relationship dynamics, listeners will gain valuable insights on how to address similar challenges in their own workplaces. Join us as we uncover the keys to managing conflict with confidence and success.

    Cultural Differences & Conflict at Work: Tips and Strategies for Resolution

    Play Episode Listen Later May 22, 2024 25:08


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, your host, Professional Mediator Simon Goode, dives into the intricate world of navigating cultural differences in the workplace. Drawing from his personal experiences working abroad in South Korea, Simon unpacks the challenges and strategies involved in bridging cultural gaps. From differing managerial styles to varying expectations around professional communication, Simon offers practical tools and real-life examples to help you understand and navigate these complex dynamics. Whether you're dealing with differences in leadership approaches or finding common ground in conflict resolution, this episode is packed with insights to enhance your cultural competence and conflict management skills. Tune in for an enlightening discussion that will equip you with the knowledge to handle workplace cultural differences with confidence and empathy. If you find this episode valuable, don't forget to subscribe and leave a positive review.

    Community Clash: Resolving a Noise Dispute with a Soccer Club

    Play Episode Listen Later May 13, 2024 43:43


    I'm your host, Simon Goode. Today, we delve into a personal conflict that hit close to home—literally—with the president of a local soccer club. Living next to the soccer field, the blend of community sport and personal peace has often been tricky to balance. This episode uncovers how I navigated the cacophony of game day disturbances, especially loud music on Anzac Day, and the challenges of conflicting neighborly values. We'll explore the importance of managing emotional reactions and strategies for conflict resolution that respect both parties' autonomy, while aiming for a collaborative outcome. Despite the stressors in personal life, including family issues, the episode presents a case study of my interaction with the club's president—turning conflict into a conversation, and fostering an environment where even a complaint about a soccer ball over the fence leads to mutual understanding and respect. Join me as I reflect on these experiences, offering insights and strategies to handle similar conflicts you might face, underscoring the importance of reciprocity and understanding in all our interactions. So tune in, and let's master the art of conflict resolution together.

    Finding Your Footing: Practical Steps to Reset After Work Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later May 8, 2024 28:45


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode delves into effective strategies for resetting after experiencing workplace conflict. Simon shares personal and professional tips, outlining a three-step process including immediate actions, evening routines, and longer-term recovery strategies to manage stress and restore balance.

    Stuck In The Middle Of Conflict Between Colleagues

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 15, 2024 28:02


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, Simon delves into the uncomfortable reality of being stuck between two conflicting parties at work, especially when there are personal stakes involved or you're simply swamped with your own tasks. He'll guide us through a three-pronged strategy to navigate these turbulent waters: maintaining impartiality without taking sides, empowering involved parties through the GROW model of coaching, and establishing firm boundaries to safeguard your own well-being.

    Strategies To Deal With Conflict With Your Housemates

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 27, 2024 38:26


    In today's episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast we're diving deeper into the intricate world of cohabitation conflicts. We've all been there—sharing a space with someone can sometimes lead to tension and disagreement. Whether it's over chores, finances, or personal values, finding the right way to address these issues is crucial for maintaining a peaceful home and healthy relationships. Now, I'm here to guide you through various strategies and insights to help you navigate these choppy waters. We'll discuss the importance of respectful communication, balancing friendliness with not sweeping problems under the rug, and preparing for a range of reactions from your housemates. We'll also stress the significance of self-awareness, regulation, empathy, and establishing firm boundaries. We'll parse through the five types of conflict—relationship, data, structure, interest, and values—all of which can show up in shared living situations. I'll provide you with practical solutions to these challenges—such as keeping records of important discussions, creating shared routines, and addressing behavior over beliefs when dealing with values conflict. Remember, these strategies might not be one-size-fits-all magic bullets. Sometimes, multiple conversations are needed to truly clear the air and move forward. But fear not, because with patience, an open mind, and the tools we discuss today, you'll be better equipped to turn your living situation into a more harmonious one. So, whether you're dealing with a high-conflict personality or trying to mend a fraying relationship, stay tuned. And don't forget, if you find our content helpful, please leave us a positive review and hit that subscribe button for more resources on mastering the art of conflict resolution in every facet of your life. Now, let's get into it.

    How To Rise Above Conflict: Navigating the Storm

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2024 45:39


    In Podcast 41, "How To Rise Above Conflict," host Simon Goode explores the mental processes involved in conflict resolution, using the funnel analogy to discuss the importance of detailed focus and expanding perspective. He delves into self-awareness concerning physical sensations and emotions, highlighting the need to manage the nervous system and reflect on reciprocal spiral patterns to effectively rise above and manage conflicts. Goode also encourages listeners to engage with the podcast through feedback and subscriptions, and shares insights from his book 'Waves,' on managing anxiety and conflict.

    Leading with Empathy: Active Listening Techniques for Managers and Professionals

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 9, 2024 33:16


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast we are unearthing the power of listening and empathy in your organization. I provide a practical framework for helping staff and collegues to feel heard in situations where you want to not only understand what they are saying, but also help them to feel supported. Hint: it's not saying, "I understand"..... and it's certainly not saying "I understand, but........ ".

    How To Manage Staff Who Don't Listen

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2024 22:25


    Welcome to the Conflict Skills Podcast! In today's episode, we dive deep into the common workplace issue of managing staff members who don't listen. Host Simon Goode takes us through practical steps for communication and leadership, sharing insights on understanding different types of conflicts, strategies for influencing behavior, and implementing tools to empower staff members. If you've ever struggled with unresponsive team members, then this episode is a must-listen. Simon's expertise will equip you with valuable skills to navigate challenging workplace dynamics. So, sit back, listen in, and get ready to enhance your conflict management toolbox!

    How To Deal With Aggressive Clients

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2024 24:31


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode addresses the increasingly common challenge of dealing with aggressive clients, attributing the uptick to various external stressors. He provides practical advice on self-regulation, using structure, setting boundaries, and assertiveness when managing aggressive client interactions, and emphasizes the importance of validating the underlying needs of the client and practicing self-care to mitigate the impact of these challenging interactions.

    Rude Colleagues: Strategies for Setting Boundaries and Resolving Workplace Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2024 20:30


    In today's episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, professional mediator Simon Goode addresses a common workplace challenge: dealing with rude coworkers. Simon shares specific steps to help listeners navigate and resolve conflicts with colleagues who exhibit negative behaviors. Simon provides strategies for addressing the issue with gradually escalating levels of assertiveness, ultimately aiming for a positive resolution. Tune in to gain valuable insights and practical techniques for managing workplace conflicts effectively.

    3 Underrated Keys To Managing Conflict & Tension In Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 20, 2023 22:08


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode discusses 3 underrated conflict skills that are effective in various situations. He emphasizes the importance of not taking things personally, remaining composed in the face of adversity, and the unexpected skill of giving 51%. Simon provides practical insights and strategies for improving these abilities, highlighting their impact on relationships and outcomes in conflict situations. Listeners are encouraged to focus on the positive, practice self-awareness, and approach conflict with a strategic, solution-oriented mindset.

    Navigating Annoying Family Dynamics During Holiday Gatherings

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 15, 2023 34:42


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode shares valuable insights and practical tips for navigating annoying family interactions during the holiday season. He emphasizes the importance of managing stress, setting boundaries, and focusing on meaningful experiences while dealing with difficult family members. Through strategies for self-regulation, boundary-setting, and goal-oriented interaction, Simon provides listeners with tools to handle challenging family dynamics with grace and resilience.

    Introverts Guide to Conflict: Tips and Techniques for Navigating Challenging Interactions

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2023 26:19


    On this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, host Simon Goode, a self-proclaimed introvert, explores the challenges introverts face when dealing with conflict. He offers valuable strategies such as the importance of preparation, tools for managing difficult conversations, and the five conflict modes—avoid, accommodate, compromise, compete, and collaborate—that introverts can employ. Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their conflict resolution approaches and find ways to navigate conflict more effectively.

    Conflict Management in Organisational Change: Reacting to Staff Resistance and Emotions

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 6, 2023 20:54


    In this episode, host Simon Goode discusses managing conflict during organizational change, specifically when the change is outside of people's control. He applies the stages of grief model by Elizabeth Kubler Ross to analyze staff reactions to change, providing examples of shock, denial, frustration, and depression, and offering strategies to support staff at each stage. Simon also emphasizes the importance of clear and frequent communication, empathetic listening, and problem-solving in effectively managing conflict during organizational change.

    Grandparents Cut Off From Grandchildren: Navigating Parent vs Grandparent Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 28, 2023 40:06


    In Episode 32 of the Conflict Skills Podcast, we explore the complex issue of parent and grandparent conflict, specifically focusing on when grandparents have limited contact with grandchildren. A number of strategies for managing these conflicts are provided, with an emphasis on the importance of self-care and self-regulation before looking at practical communication techniques. Overall, this episode provides valuable insights and practical advice for navigating the challenging dynamics between parents and grandparents.

    Repairing Friendships: Difficult Conversations Need Understanding and Problem-Solving

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2023 13:45


    In this episode, we'll be exploring a step-by-step structure for these difficult conversations, including how to approach the other person's perspective, conveying understanding, and problem-solving collaboratively. This episode is part of a series on repairing friendships, so if you've missed the previous episodes, be sure to check them out for valuable insights.

    Repairing Friendships: How To Apologise To A Friend

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 15, 2023 19:55


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, we discuss the art of apologising to a friend - to repair a relationship and hopefully introduce a turning point for a more positive direction in your friendship. You will learn the five different types of apologies as well as how and when to use each type.

    Repairing Friendships: Key Principles for Restoring Connection and Resolving Conflict

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2023 22:33


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, we explore the topic of repairing a relationship with a friend. We consider the importance of understanding the subjective nature of relationships and the need for curiosity and empathy in the repair process. Tips on how to approach conversations with friends, emphasizing the value of being gentle, kind, and unassuming while avoiding criticism.

    Dealing With Those Annoying People Who Try To Dominate Meetings

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2023 27:30


    This episode is about how to deal with people who are dominating a meeting you are in. Simon explains the 5 different options for dealing with this kind of behaviour and how to figure out which approach will work best in your situation.

    Overcoming Defensiveness: Strategies for Productive Engagement with Defensive Employees

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2023


    In this episode of the Conflict Skills Podcast, we dive into the topic of how to deal with a defensive employee. As a professional mediator, I share strategies for effective communication to minimize resistance and defensiveness. We also explore the importance of self-care and regulating our own emotions when faced with defensive behavior.

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