Podcasts about die wise

On this episode, my guest is Stephen Jenkinson, culture activist and ceremonialist advocating a handmade life and eloquence. He is an author, a storyteller, a musician, sculptor and off-grid organic farmer. Stephen is the founder/ principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School in Canada, co-founded with his wife Nathalie Roy in 2010. Also a sought-after workshop leader, articulating matters of the heart, human suffering, confusions through ceremony.He is the author of several influential books, including Money and the Soul's Desires, Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul (2015), Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble (2018), A Generation's Worth: Spirit Work While the Crisis Reigns (2021), and Reckoning (2022), co-written with Kimberly Ann Johnson. His most recent book, Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work, was released in August 2025. He is also involved in the musical project Nights of Grief & Mystery with singer-songwriter Gregory Hoskins, which has toured across North America, Europe, Australia, and New Zealand.Show Notes:* The Bone House of the Orphan Wisdom Enterprise* Matrimony: Ritual, Culture and the Heart's Work* The Wedding Industry* Romantic Sameness and Psychic Withering* The Two Tribes* The Roots of Hospitality* The Pompous Ending of Hospitality* Debt, And the Estrangement of the Stranger* More Than Human Hospitality* The Alchemy of the Orphan Wisdom SchoolHomework:Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work | PurchaseOrphan WisdomThe Scriptorium: Echoes of an Orphan WisdomTranscription:Chris: This is an interview that I've been wondering about for a long time in part, because Stephen was the first person I ever interviewed for the End of Tourism Podcast. In Oaxaca, Mexico, where I live Stephen and Natalie were visiting and were incredibly, incredibly generous. Stephen, in offering his voice as a way to raise up my questions to a level that deserve to be contended with.We spoke for about two and a half hours, if I remember correctly. And there was a lot in what you spoke to towards the second half of the interview that I think we're the first kind of iterations of the Matrimony book.We spoke a little bit about the stranger and trade, and it was kind of startling as someone trying to offer their first interview and suddenly hearing something [00:01:00] that I'd never heard before from Stephen. Right. And so it was quite impressive. And I'm grateful to be here now with y'all and to get to wonder about this a little more deeply with you Stephen.Stephen: Mm-hmm. Hmm.Chris: This is also a special occasion for the fact that for the first time in the history of the podcast, we have a live audience among us today. Strange doings. Some scholars and some stewards and caretakers of the Orphan Wisdom enterprise. So, thank you all as well for coming tonight and being willing to listen and put your ears to this.And so to begin, Stephen, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to let those who will be listening to this recording later on know where we're gathered in tonight?Stephen: Well, we're in... what's the name of this township?Nathalie: North Algona.Stephen: North Algona township on the borders, an eastern gate [00:02:00] of Algonquin Park. Strangely named place, given the fact that they were the first casualties of the park being established. And we're in a place that never should have been cleared - my farm. It should never have been cleared of the talls, the white pines that were here, but the admiralty was in need back in the day. And that's what happened there. And we're in a place that the Irish immigrants who came here after the famine called "Tramore," which more or less means "good-frigging luck farming."It doesn't technically mean that, but it absolutely means that. It actually means "sandy shore," which about covers the joint, and it's the only thing that covers the joint - would be sand. You have to import clay. Now, that's a joke in many farming places in the world, but if we wanted any clay, we'd have to bring it in and pay for the privilege.And the farm has been in [00:03:00] my, my responsibility for about 25 years now, pretty close to that. And the sheep, or those of them left because the coyotes have been around for the first time in their casualty-making way... They're just out here, I'm facing the field where they're milling around.And it's the very, very beginnings of the long cooling into cold, into frigid, which is our lot in this northern part of the hemisphere, even though it's still August, but it's clear that things have changed. And then, we're on a top of a little hill, which was the first place that I think that we may have convened a School here.It was a tipi, which is really worked very well considering we didn't live here, so we could put it up and put it down in the same weekend. [00:04:00] And right on this very hill, we were, in the early days, and we've replaced that tipi with another kind of wooden structure. A lot more wood in this one.This has been known as "The Teaching Hall" or "The Great Hall," or "The Hall" or "The Money Pit, as it was known for a little while, but it actually worked out pretty well. And it was I mean, people who've come from Scandinavia are knocked out by the kind of old-style, old-world visitation that the place seems to be to them.And I'd never really been before I had the idea what this should look like, but I just went from a kind of ancestral memory that was knocking about, which is a little different than your preferences, you know. You have different kinds of preferences you pass through stylistically through your life, but the ones that lay claim to you are the ones that are not interested in your [00:05:00] preferences. They're interested in your kind of inheritance and your lineage.So I'm more or less from the northern climes of Northern Europe, and so the place looks that way and I was lucky enough to still have my carving tools from the old days. And I've carved most of the beams and most of the posts that keep the place upright with a sort of sequence of beasts and dragons and ne'er-do-wells and very, very few humans, I think two, maybe, in the whole joint. Something like that. And then, mostly what festoons a deeply running human life is depicted here. And there's all kinds of stories, which I've never really sat down and spoken to at great length with anybody, but they're here.And I do deeply favour the idea that one day [00:06:00] somebody will stumble into this field, and I suppose, upon the remains of where we sit right now, and wonder "What the hell got into somebody?" That they made this mountain of timber moldering away, and that for a while what must have been, and when they finally find the footprint of, you know, its original dimensions and sort of do the wild math and what must have been going on in this sandy field, a million miles in away from its home.And wherever I am at that time, I'll be wondering the same thing.Audience: Hmm.Stephen: "What went on there?" Even though I was here for almost all of it. So, this was the home of the Orphan Wisdom School for more than a decade and still is the home of the Orphan Wisdom School, even if it's in advance, or in retreat [00:07:00] or in its doldrums. We'll see.And many things besides, we've had weddings in here, which is wherein I discovered "old-order matrimony," as I've come to call it, was having its way with me in the same way that the design of the place did. And it's also a grainery for our storage of corn. Keep it up off the ground and out of the hands of the varmints, you know, for a while.Well that's the beginning.Chris: Hmm. Hmm. Thank you Stephen.Stephen: Mm-hmm.Chris: You were mentioning the tipi where the school began. I remember sleeping in there the first time I came here. Never would I have thought for a million years that I'd be sitting here with you.Stephen: It's wild, isn't it?Chris: 12 years later.?: Yeah.Chris: And so next, I'd like to do my best in part over the course of the next perhaps hour or two to congratulate you on the release of [00:08:00] your new book, Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work.Stephen: Thank you.Chris: Mm-hmm. I'm grateful to say like many others that I've received a copy and have lent my eyes to your good words, and what is really an incredible achievement.For those who haven't had a chance to lay their eyes on it just yet, I'm wondering if you could let us in on why you wrote a book about matrimony in our time and where it stands a week out from its publication.Stephen: Well, maybe the answer begins with the question, "why did you write a book, having done so before?" And you would imagine that the stuff that goes into writing a book, you'd think that the author has hopes for some kind of redemptive, redeeming outcome, some kind of superlative that drops out the back end of the enterprise.And you know, this is [00:09:00] the seventh I've written. And I would have to say that's not really how it goes, and you don't really know what becomes of what you've written, even with the kind people who do respond, and the odd non-monetary prize that comes your way, which Die Wise gamed that.But I suppose, I wrote, at all partly to see what was there. You know, I had done these weddings and I was a little bit loathe to let go, to let the weddings turn entirely into something historical, something that was past, even though I probably sensed pretty clearly that I was at the end of my willingness to subject myself to the slings and arrows that came along with the enterprise, but it's a sweet sorrow, or there's a [00:10:00] wonder that goes along with the tangle of it all. And so, I wrote to find out what happened, as strange as that might sound to you. You can say, "well, you were there, you kind of knew what happened." But yes, I was witness to the thing, but there's the act of writing a book gives you the opportunity to sort of wonder in three-dimensions and well, the other thing I should say is I was naive and figured that the outfit who had published the, more or less prior two books to this one, would kind of inevitably be drawn to the fact that same guy. Basically, same voice, new articulation. And I was dumbfounded to find out that they weren't. And so, it's sort of smarted, you know?And I think what I did was I just set the whole [00:11:00] enterprise aside, partly to contend with the the depths of the disappointment in that regard, and also not wanting to get into the terrible fray of having to parse or paraphrase the book in some kind of elevator pitch-style to see if anybody else wanted to look at it. You know, such as my touchy sense of nobility sometimes, you know, that I just rather not be involved in the snarl of the marketplace any longer.So, I withdrew and I just set it aside but it wasn't that content to be set, set aside. And you know, to the book's credit, it bothered me every once in a while. It wasn't a book at the point where I was actually trying to engineer it, you know, and, and give it some kind of structure. I had piles of paper on the floor representing the allegation of chapters, trying to figure out what the relationship was [00:12:00] between any of these things.What conceivably should come before what. What the names of any of these things might be. Did they have an identity? Was I just imposing it? And all of that stuff I was going through at the same time as I was contending with a kind of reversal in fortune, personally. And so in part, it was a bit of a life raft to give me something to work on that I wouldn't have to research or dig around in the backyard for it and give me some sort of self-administered occupation for a while.Finally, I think there's a parallel with the Die Wise book, in that when it came to Die Wise, I came up with what I came up with largely because, in their absolute darkest, most unpromising hours, an awful lot of dying people, all of whom are dead now, [00:13:00] let me in on some sort of breach in the, the house of their lives.And I did feel that I had some obligation to them long-term, and that part of that obligation turned into writing Die Wise and touring and talking about that stuff for years and years, and making a real fuss as if I'd met them all, as if what happened is really true. Not just factually accurate, but deeply, abidingly, mandatorily true.So, although it may be the situation doesn't sound as extreme, but the truth is, when a number of younger - than me - people came to me and asked me to do their weddings, I, over the kind of medium-term thereafter, felt a not dissimilar obligation that the events that ensued from all of that not [00:14:00] be entrusted entirely to those relatively few people who attended. You know, you can call them "an audience," although I hope I changed that. Or you could call them "witnesses," which I hope I made them that.And see to it that there could be, not the authorized or official version of what happened, but to the view from here, so to speak, which is, as I sit where I am in the hall right now, I can look at the spot where I conducted much of this when I wasn't sacheting up and down the middle aisle where the trestle tables now are.And I wanted to give a kind of concerted voice to that enterprise. And I say "concerted voice" to give you a feel for the fact that I don't think this is a really an artifact. It's not a record. It's a exhortation that employs the things that happened to suggest that even though it is the way it is [00:15:00] ritually, impoverished as it is in our time and place, it has been otherwise within recoverable time and history. It has.And if that's true, and it is, then it seems to me at least is true that it could be otherwise again. And so, I made a fuss and I made a case based on that conviction.There's probably other reasons I can't think of right now. Oh, being not 25 anymore, and not having that many more books in me, the kind of wear and tear on your psyche of imposing order on the ramble, which is your recollection, which has only so many visitations available in it. Right? You can only do that so many times, I think. And I'm not a born writing person, you know, I come to it maniacally when I [00:16:00] do, and then when it's done, I don't linger over it so much.So then, when it's time to talk about it, I actually have to have a look, because the act of writing it is not the act of reading it. The act of writing is a huge delivery and deliverance at the same time. It's a huge gestation. And you can't do that to yourself, you know, over and over again, but you can take some chances, and look the thing in the eye. So, and I think some people who are there, they're kind of well-intended amongst them, will recognize themselves in the details of the book, beyond "this is what happened and so on." You know, they'll recognize themselves in the advocacy that's there, and the exhortations that are there, and the [00:17:00] case-making that I made and, and probably the praying because there's a good degree of prayerfulness in there, too.That's why.Chris: Thank you. bless this new one in the world. And what's the sense for you?Stephen: Oh, yes.Chris: It being a one-week old newborn. How's that landing in your days?Stephen: Well, it's still damp, you know. It's still squeaky, squeaky and damp. It's walking around like a newborn primate, you know, kind of swaying in the breeze and listening to port or to starboard according to whatever's going on.I don't know that it's so very self-conscious in the best sense of that term, yet. Even though I recorded the audio version, I don't think [00:18:00] it's my voice is found every nook and cranny at this point, yet. So, it's kind of new. It's not "news," but it is new to me, you know, and it's very early in terms of anybody responding to it.I mean, nobody around me has really taken me aside and say, "look, now I want to tell you about this book you wrote." It hasn't happened, and we'll see if it does, but I've done a few events on the other side of the ocean and hear so far, very few, maybe handful of interviews. And those are wonderful opportunities to hear something of what you came up with mismanaged by others, you know, misapprehend, you could say by others.No problem. I mean, it's absolutely no problem. And if you don't want that to happen, don't talk, don't write anything down. So, I don't mind a bit, you know, and the chances are very good that it'll turn into things I didn't have in mind [00:19:00] as people take it up, and regard their own weddings and marriages and plans and schemes and fears and, you know, family mishigas and all the rest of it through this particular lens, you know. They may pick up a pen or a computer (it's an odd expression, "pick up a computer"), and be in touch with me and let me know. "Yeah, that was, we tried it" or whatever they're going to do, because, I mean, maybe Die Wise provided a bit of an inkling of how one might be able to proceed otherwise in their dying time or in their families or their loved ones dying time.This is the book that most readily lends itself to people translating into something they could actually do, without a huge kind of psychic revolution or revolt stirring in them, at least not initially. This is as close as I come, probably, to writing a sequence of things [00:20:00] that could be considered "add-ons" to what people are already thinking about, that I don't force everybody else outta the house in order to make room for the ideas that are in the book. That may happen, anyway, but it wasn't really the intent. The intent was to say, you know, we are in those days when we're insanely preoccupied with the notion of a special event. We are on the receiving end of a considerable number of shards showing up without any notion really about what these shards remember or are memories of. And that's the principle contention I think that runs down the spine of the book, is that when we undertake matrimony, however indelicately, however by rote, you know, however mindlessly we may do it, [00:21:00] inadvertently, we call upon those shards nonetheless.And they're pretty unspectacular if you don't think about them very deeply, like the rice or confetti, like the aisle, like the procession up the aisle, like the giving away of someone, like the seating arrangement, like the spectacle seating arrangement rather than the ritual seating arrangement.And I mean, there's a fistful of them. And they're around and scholars aside maybe, nobody knows why they do them. Everybody just knows, "this is what a wedding is," but nobody knows why. And because nobody knows why, nobody really seems to know what a wedding is for, although they do proceed like they would know a wedding if they saw one. So, I make this a question to be really wondered about, and the shards are a way in. They're the kind of [00:22:00] breadcrumb trail through the forest. They're the little bits of broken something, which if you begin to handle just three or four of them, and kind of fit them together, and find something of the original shape and inflection of the original vessel, kind of enunciates, begins to murmur in your hands, and from it you can begin to infer some three-dimensionality to the original shape. And from the sense of the shape, you get a set sense of contour, and from the sense of contour, you get a sense of scale or size. And from that you get a sense of purpose, or function, or design. And from that you get a sense of some kind of serious magisterial insight into some of the fundament of human being that was manifest in the "old-order matrimony," [00:23:00] as I came to call it.So, who wouldn't wanna read that book?Chris: Mm-hmm.Thank you. Mm-hmm. Thank you, Stephen. Yeah. It reminds me, just before coming up here, maybe two weeks ago, I was in attending a wedding. And there was a host or mc, and initially just given what I was hearing over the microphone, it was hard to tell if he was hired or family or friends. And it turned out he was, in fact, a friend of the groom. And throughout the night he proceeded to take up that role as a kind of comedian.Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: This was the idea, I guess. Mm-hmm. And he was buzzing and mumbling and swearing into the microphone, [00:24:00] and then finally minimizing the only remnant of traditional culture that showed up in the wedding. And his thing was, okay, so when can we get to the part where it's boom, boom, boom, right. And shot, shot, shot, whatever.Stephen: Right.Chris: There was so much that came up in my memories in part because I worked about a decade in Toronto in the wedding industry.Mm-hmm. Hospitality industry. Maybe a contradiction in terms, there. And there was one moment that really kind of summed it up. I kept coming back to this reading the book because it was everything that you wrote seemed to not only antithetical to this moment, but also an antidote.Anyways, it was in North Toronto and the [00:25:00] owner of the venue - it was a kind of movie theatre turned event venue - and there was a couple who was eventually going to get married there. They came in to do their tasting menu to see what they wanted to put on the menu for the dinner, for their wedding.And the owner was kind of this mafioso type. And he comes in and he sees them and he walks over and he says, "so, you're gonna get married at my wedding factory."Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: In all sincerity.Stephen: Mm-hmm.Chris: Right.Without skipping a beat. Could you imagine?Stephen: Yeah.I could. I sure could.Chris: Yeah. Yeah.Stephen: I mean, don't forget, if these people weren't doing what the people wanted, they'd be outta business.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: No, that's the thing. This is aiding and abetting. This is sleeping with the enemy, stylistically-speaking. [00:26:00] The fact that people "settle" (that's the term I would use for it), settle for this, the idea being that this somehow constitutes the most honest and authentic through line available to us is just jaw dropping. When you consider what allegedly this thing is supposed to be for. I mean, maybe we'll get into this, but I'll just leave this as a question for now. What is that moment allegedly doing?Not, what are the people in it allegedly doing? The moment itself, what is it? How is it different from us sitting here now talking about it? And how is it different from the gory frigging jet-fuelled aftermath of excess. And how's it different from the cursing alleged master of ceremonies? How can you [00:27:00] tell none of those things belong to this thing?And why do you have such a hard time imagining what doesAudience: Hmm mmChris: Well that leads me to my next question.Stephen: Ah, you're welcome.Chris: So, I've pulled a number of quotes from the book to read from over the course of the interview. And this one for anyone who's listening is on page 150. And you write Stephen,"Spiritually-speaking, most of the weddings in our corner of the world are endogamous affairs, inward-looking. What is, to me, most unnerving is that they can be spiritually-incestuous. The withering of psychic difference between people is the program of globalization. It is in the architecture of most things partaking of the internet, and it is in the homogeneity of our matrimony. [00:28:00] It is this very incestuous that matrimony was once crafted and entered into to avoid and subvert. Now, it grinds upon our differences until they are details.And so, this paragraph reminded me of a time in my youth when I seemed to be meeting couples who very eerily looked like each other. No blood or extended kin relation whatsoever, and yet they had very similar faces. And so as I get older, this kind of face fidelity aside, I continue to notice that people looking for companionship tend to base their search on similitude, on shared interests, customs, experiences, shared anything and everything. This, specifically, in opposition to those on the other side of the aisle or spectrum, to difference or divergence. And so, opposites don't attract anymore. I'm curious what you think this psychic [00:29:00] withering does to an achieve understanding of matrimony.Stephen: Well, I mean, let's wonder what it does to us, generally, first before we get to matrimony, let's say. It demonizes. Maybe that's too strong, but it certainly reconstitutes difference as some kind of affliction, some kind of not quite good enough, some kind of something that has to be overcome or overwhelmed on the road to, to what? On the road to sameness? So, if that's the goal, then are all of the differences between us, aberrations of some kind, if that's the goal? If that's the goal, are all the [00:30:00] differences between us, not God-given, but humanly misconstrued or worse? Humanly wrought? Do the differences between us conceivably then belong at all? Or is the principle object of the entire endeavor to marry yourself, trying to put up with the vague differences that the other person represents to you?I mean, I not very jokingly said years ago, that I coined a phrase that went something like "the compromise of infinity, which is other people." What does that mean? "The compromise of infinity, which is other people." Not to mention it's a pretty nice T-shirt. But what I meant by the [00:31:00] phrase is this: when you demonize difference in this fashion or when you go the other direction and lionize sameness, then one of the things that happens is that compromise becomes demonized, too. Compromise, by definition, is something you never should have done, right? Compromise is how much you surrender of yourself in order to get by. That's what all these things become. And before you know it, you're just beaten about the head and shoulders about "codependence" and you know, not being "true to yourself" as if being true to yourself is some kind of magic.I mean, the notion that "yourself is the best part of you" is just hilarious. I mean, when you think about it, like who's running amuck if yourself is what you're supposed to be? I ask you. Like, who's [00:32:00] doing the harm? Who's going mental if the self is such a good idea? So, of course, I'm maintaining here that I'm not persuaded that there is such a thing.I think it's a momentary lapse in judgment to have a self and to stick to it. That's the point I'm really making to kind of reify it until it turns ossified and dusty and bizarrely adamant like that estranged relative that lives in the basement of your house. Bizarrely, foreignly adamant, right? Like the house guest who just won't f**k off kind of thing.Okay, so "to thine own self be true," is it? Well, try being true to somebody else's self for ten minutes. Try that. [00:33:00] That's good at exercise for matrimony - being true to somebody else's self. You'll discover that their selves are not made in heaven, either. Either. I underscore it - either. I've completely lost track of the question you asked me.Chris: What are the consequences of the sameness on this anti-cultural sameness, and the program of it for an achieved understanding of matrimony.Stephen: Thank you. Well, I will fess up right now. I do so in the book. That's a terrible phrase. I swear I'd never say such a thing. "In my book... I say the following," but in this case, it's true. I did say this. I realized during the writing of it that I had made a tremendous tactical error in the convening of the event as I did it over the years, [00:34:00] and this is what it came to.I was very persuaded at the time of the story that appears in the chapter called "Salt and Indigo" in the book. I was very, very persuaded. I mean, listen, I made up the story (for what it's worth), okay, but I didn't make it up out of nothing. I made it up out of a kind of tribal memory that wouldn't quite let go.And in it, I was basically saying, here's these two tribes known principally for what they trade in and what they love most emphatically. They turn out to be the same thing. And I describe a circumstance in which they exchange things in a trade scenario, not a commerce scenario. And I'm using the chapter basically to make the case that matrimony's architecture derives in large measure from the sacraments of trade as manifest in that story. [00:35:00] Okay. And this is gonna sound obvious, but the fundamental requirement of the whole conceit that I came up with is that there are two tribes. Well, I thought to myself, "of course, there's always two tribes" at the time. And the two tribe-ness is reflected in when you come to the wedding site, you're typically asked (I hope you're still asked) " Are you family or friend of the groom or friend of the bride?" And you're seated "accordingly," right? That's the nominal, vestigial shard of this old tribal affiliation, that people came from over the rise, basically unknown to each other, to arrive at the kind of no man's land of matrimony, and proceeded accordingly. So, I put these things into motion in this very room and I sat people accordingly facing each other, not facing the alleged front of the room. [00:36:00] And of course, man, nobody knew where to look, because you raised your eyes and s**t. There's just humans across from you, just scads of them who you don't freaking know. And there's something about doing that to North Americas that just throws them. So, they're just looking at each other and then looking away, and looking at each other and looking away, and wondering what they're doing here and what it's for. And I'm going back and forth for three hours, orienting them as to what is is coming.Okay, so what's the miscalculation that I make? The miscalculation I made was assuming that by virtue of the seating arrangement, by virtue of me reminding them of the salt and indigo times, by virtue of the fact that they had a kind of allegiance of some sort or another to the people who are, for the moment, betrothed, that those distinctions and those affiliations together would congeal them, and constitute a [00:37:00] kind of tribal affiliation that they would intuitively be drawn towards as you would be drawn to heat on a cold winter's night.Only to discover, as I put the thing into motion that I was completely wrong about everything I just told you about. The nature of my error was this, virtually all of those people on one side of the room were fundamentally of the same tribe as the people on the other side of the room, apropos of your question, you see. They were card carrying members of the gray dominant culture of North America. Wow. The bleached, kind of amorphous, kind of rootless, ancestor-free... even regardless of whether their people came over in the last generation from the alleged old country. It doesn't really claim them.[00:38:00]There were two tribes, but I was wrong about who they were. That was one tribe. Virtually everybody sitting in the room was one tribe.So, who's the other tribe? Answer is: me and the four or five people who were in on the structural delivery of this endeavour with me. We were the other tribe.We didn't stand a chance, you see?And I didn't pick up on that, and I didn't cast it accordingly and employ that, instead. I employed the conceit that I insisted was manifest and mobilized in the thing, instead of the manifest dilemma, which is that everybody who came knew what a wedding was, and me and four or five other people were yet to know if this could be one. That was the tribal difference, if you [00:39:00] will.So, it was kind of invisible, wasn't it? Even to me at the time. Or, I say, maybe especially to me at the time. And so, things often went the way they went, which was for however much fascination and willingness to consider that there might have been in the room, there was quite a bit more either flat affect and kind of lack of real fascination, or curiosity, or sometimes downright hostility and pushback. Yeah.So, all of that comes from the fact that I didn't credit as thoroughly as I should have done, the persistence in Anglo-North America of a kind of generic sameness that turned out to be what most people came here ancestrally to become. "Starting again" is recipe for culture [00:40:00] loss of a catastrophic order. The fantasy of starting again. Right?And we've talked about that in your podcast, and you and I have talked about it privately, apropos of your own family and everybody's sitting in this room knows what I'm talking about. And when does this show up? Does it show up, oh, when you're walking down the street? Does it show up when you're on the mountaintop? Does it show up in your peak experiences? And the answer is "maybe." It probably shows up most emphatically in those times when you have a feeling that something special is supposed to be so, and all you can get from the "supposed to" is the allegation of specialness.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: And then, you look around in the context of matrimony and you see a kind of febral, kind of strained, the famous bridezilla stuff, all of that stuff. [00:41:00] You saw it in the hospitality industry, no doubt. You know, the kind of mania for perfection, as if perfection constitutes culture. Right? With every detail checked off in the checkbox, that's culture. You know, as if everything goes off without a hitch and there's no guffaws. And in fact, anybody could reasonably make the case, "Where do you think culture appears when the script finally goes f*****g sideways?" That's when. And when you find out what you're capable of, ceremonially.And generally speaking, I think most people discovered that their ceremonial illiteracy bordered on the bottomless.That's when you find out. Hmm.Chris: Wow.Stephen: Yeah. And that's why people, you know, in speech time, they reach in there and get that piece of paper, and just look at it. Mm-hmm. They don't even look up, terrified that they're gonna go off script for a minute as [00:42:00] if the Gods of Matrimony are a scripted proposition.Chris: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Thank you for sharing that with us, that degree of deep reflection and humility that I'm sure comes with it.Stephen: Mea Culpa, baby. Yeah, I was, I got that one totally wrong. Mm-hmm. And I didn't know it at the time. Meanwhile, like, how much can you transgress and have the consequences of doing so like spill out across the floor like a broken thermometer's mercury and not wise up.But of course, I was as driven as anybody. I was as driven to see if I could come through with what I promised to do the year before. And keeping your promise can make you into a maniac.Audience: Hmm hmm.Chris: But I imagine that, you [00:43:00] know, you wouldn't have been able to see that even years later if you didn't say yes in the first place.Stephen: Oh, yeah. Yeah. And I wouldn't have been able to make the errors.Chris: Right.Stephen: Right. Yeah. I mean, as errors go, this is not a mortal sin. Right, right. And you could chalk it up to being a legitimate miscalculation. Well, so? All I'm saying is, it turns out I was there too, and it turns out, even though I was allegedly the circus master of the enterprise, I wasn't free and clear of the things we were all contending with, the kind of mortality and sort of cultural ricketiness that were all heirs to. That's how I translated it, as it turns out.So, PS there was a moment, [00:44:00] which I don't remember which setting it was now, but there was a moment when the "maybe we'll see if she becomes a bride" bride's mother slid up to me during the course of the proceedings, and in a kind of stage whisper more or less hissed me as follows."Is this a real wedding?"I mean, that's not a question. Not in that setting, obviously not. That is an accusation. Right. And a withering one at that. And there was a tremendous amount of throw-down involved.So, was it? I mean, what we do know is that she did not go to any of the weddings [00:45:00] that she was thinking of at the time, and go to the front of the room where the celebrant is austerely standing there with the book, or the script, or the well-intentioned, or the self-penned vows and never hissed at him or her, "is this a real wedding?"Never once did she do that. We know that.Right.And I think we know why. But she was fairly persuaded she knew what a real wedding was. And all she was really persuaded by was the poverty of the weddings that she'd attended before that one. Well, I was as informed in that respect as she was, wasn't I? I just probably hadn't gone to as many reprobate weddings as she had, so she had more to deal with than I did, even though I was in the position of the line of fire.And I didn't respond too well to the question, I have to say. At the moment, I was rather combative. But I mean, you try to do [00:46:00] what I tried to do and not have a degree of fierceness to go along with your discernment, you know, just to see if you can drag this carcass across the threshold. Anyway, that happened too.Chris: Wow. Yeah. Dominant culture of North America.Stephen: Heard of it.Chris: Yeah. Well, in Matrimony, there's quite a bit in which you write about hospitality and radical hospitality. And I wanted to move in that direction a little bit, because in terms of these kind of marketplace rituals or ceremonies that you were mentioning you know, it's something that we might wonder, I think, as you have, how did it come to be this [00:47:00] way?And so I'd like to, if I can once again, quote from matrimony in which you speak to the etymology of hospitality. And so for those interested on page 88,"the word hospitality comes from hospitaller, meaning 'one who cares for the afflicted, the infirm, the needy.' There's that thread of our misgivings about being on the receiving end of hospitality. Pull on it. For the written history of the word, at least, it has meant, 'being on the receiving end of a kind of care you'd rather not need.'"End quote.Stephen: That's so great. I mean, before you go on with the quote. It's so great to know that the word, unexamined, just kind of leaks upside, doesn't it? Hospitality, I mean, nobody goes "Hospitality, ew." [00:48:00] And then, if you just quietly do the obvious math to yourself, there's so much awkwardness around hospitality.This awkwardness must have an origin, have a home. There must be some misgiving that goes along with the giving of hospitality, mustn't there be? How else to understand where that kind of ickiness is to be found. Right? And it turns out that the etymology is giving you the beginnings of a way of figuring it out what it is that you're on the receiving end of - a kind of succor that you wish you didn't need, which is why it's the root word for "hospital."Chris: Hmm hmm. Wow.Audience: Hmm.Chris: May I repeat that sentence please? Once more."For the written history of the word, at least, it has meant, [00:49:00] 'being on the receiving end of a kind of care you'd rather not need.'"And so this last part hits home for me as I imagine it does for many.And it feels like the orthodoxy of hospitality in our time is one based not only in transaction, but in debt. And if you offer hospitality to me, then I owe you hospitality.Stephen: Right.Chris: I'm indebted to you. And we are taught, in our time, that the worst thing to be in is in debt.Stephen: Right?Chris: And so people refuse both the desire to give as well as the learning skill of receiving. And this is continuing on page 88 now."But there's mystery afoot with this word. In its old Latin form, hospice meant both 'host' and 'guest.'"Stephen: Amazing. One. Either one, This is absolutely amazing. We're fairly sure that there's a [00:50:00] acres of difference between the giver of hospitality and the receiver that the repertoire is entirely different, that the skew between them is almost insurmountable, that they're not interchangeable in any way. But the history of the word immediately says, "really?" The history of the word, without question, says that "host" and "guest" are virtually the same, sitting in different places, being different people, more or less joined at the hip. I'll say more, but you go ahead with what you were gonna do. Sure.Chris: "In it's proto Indo-European origins, hospitality and hospice is a compound word: gosh + pot. And it meant something like [00:51:00] 'stranger/guest/host + powerful Lord.'It is amazing to me that ancestrally, the old word for guest, host, and stranger were all the same word. Potent ceremonial business, this is. In those days, the server and the serve were partners in something mysterious. This could be confusing, but only if you think of guest, host, and stranger as fixed identities.If you think of them as functions, as verbs, the confusion softens and begins to clear. The word hospice in its ancient root is telling us that each of the people gathered together in hospitality is bound to the others by formal etiquette, yes, but the bond is transacted through a subtle scheme of graces.Hospitality, it tells us, is a web of longing and belonging that binds people for a time, some hithereto unknown to each other is a clutch of mutually-binding elegances, you could say. In its ancient practice, [00:52:00] hospitality was a covenant. According to that accord, however we were with each other. That was how the Gods would be with us. We learn our hospitality by being on the receiving end of Godly administration. That's what giving thanks for members. We proceed with our kin in imitation of that example and in gratitude for it."Mm-hmm.And so today, among "secular" people, with the Gods ignored, this old-time hospitality seems endangered, if not fugitive. I'm curious how you imagine that this rupture arose, the ones that separated and commercialized the radical relationships between hosts and guests, that turned them from verbs to nouns and something like strangers to marketplace functions.[00:53:00]Stephen: Well, of course this is a huge question you've asked, and I'll see if I can unhuge it a bit.Chris: Uhhuh.Stephen: Let's go right to the heart of what happened. Just no preliminaries, just right to it.So, to underscore again, the beauty of the etymology. I've told you over and over again, the words will not fail you. And this is just a shining example, isn't it? That the fraternization is a matter of ceremonial alacrity that the affiliation between host and guest, which makes them partners in something, that something is the [00:54:00] evocation of a third thing that's neither one of them. It's the thing they've lent themselves to by virtue of submitting to being either a host or a guest. One.Two. You could say that in circumstances of high culture or highly-functioning culture, one of the principle attributes of that culture is that the fundament of its understanding, is that only with the advent of the stranger in their midst that the best of them comes forward.Okay, follow that. Yeah.So, this is a little counterintuitive for those of us who don't come from such places. We imagine that the advent of strangers in the midst of the people I'm describing would be an occasion where people hide their [00:55:00] best stuff away until the stranger disappears, and upon the disappearance of the stranger, the good stuff comes out again.You know?So, I'm just remembering just now, there's a moment in the New Testament where Jesus says something about the best wine and he's coming from exactly this page that we're talking about - not the page in the book, but this understanding. He said, you know, "serve your best wine first," unlike the standard, that prevails, right?So again, what a stranger does in real culture is call upon the cultural treasure of the host's culture, and provides the opportunity for that to come forward, right? By which you can understand... Let's say for simplicity's sake, there's two kinds of hospitality. There's probably all kinds of gradations, [00:56:00] but for the purposes of responding to what you've asked, there's two.One of them is based on kinship. Okay? So, family meal. So, everybody knows whose place is whose around the table, or it doesn't matter - you sit wherever you want. Or, when we're together, we speak shorthand. That's the shorthand of familiarity and affinity, right?Everybody knows what everybody's talking about. A lot of things get half-said or less, isn't it? And there's a certain fineness, isn't it? That comes with that kind of affinity. Of course, there is, and I'm not diminishing it at all. I'm just characterizing it as being of a certain frequency or calibre or charge. And the charge is that it trades on familiarity. It requires that. There's that kind of hospitality."Oh, sit wherever you want."Remember this one?[00:57:00]"We don't stand on ceremony here.""Oh, you're one of the family now." I just got here. What, what?But, of course, you can hear in the protestations the understanding, in that circumstance, that formality is an enemy to feeling good in this moment, isn't it? It feels stiff and starched and uncalled for or worse.It feels imported from elsewhere. It doesn't feel friendly. So, I'm giving you now beginnings of a differentiation between how cultures who really function as cultures understand what it means to be hospitable and what often prevails today, trading is a kind of low-grade warfare conducted against the strangeness of the stranger.The whole purpose of treating somebody like their family is to mitigate, and finally neutralize their [00:58:00] strangeness, so that for the purposes of the few hours in front of us all, there are no strangers here. Right? Okay.Then there's another kind, and intuitively you can feel what I'm saying. You've been there, you know exactly what I mean.There's another kind of circumstance where the etiquette that prevails is almost more emphatic, more tangible to you than the familiar one. That's the one where your mother or your weird aunt or whoever she might be, brings out certain kind of stuff that doesn't come out every day. And maybe you sit in a room that you don't often sit in. And maybe what gets cooked is stuff you haven't seen in a long time. And some part of you might be thinking, "What the hell is all this about?" And the answer is: it's about that guy in the [00:59:00] corner that you don't know.And your own ancestral culture told acres of stories whose central purpose was to convey to outsiders their understanding of what hospitality was. That is fundamentally what The Iliad and The Odyssey are often returning to and returning to and returning to.They even had a word for the ending of the formal hospitality that accrued, that arose around the care and treatment of strangers. It was called pomp or pompe, from which we get the word "pompous." And you think about what the word "pompous" means today.It means "nose in the air," doesn't it? Mm-hmm. It means "thinks really highly of oneself," isn't it? And it means "useless, encumbering, kind of [01:00:00] artificial kind of going through the motions stuff with a kind of aggrandizement for fun." That's what "pompous" means. Well, the people who gave us the word didn't mean that at all. This word was the word they used to describe the particular moment of hospitality when it was time for the stranger to leave.And when it was mutually acknowledged that the time for hospitality has come to an end, and the final act of hospitality is to accompany the stranger out of the house, out of the compound, out into the street, and provision them accordingly, and wish them well, and as is oftentimes practiced around here, standing in the street and waving them long after they disappear from view.This is pompous. This is what it actually means. Pretty frigging cool when you get corrected once in a while, isn't it? [01:01:00] Yeah.So, as I said, to be simplistic about it, there's at least a couple of kinds, and one of them treasures the advent of the stranger, understanding it to be the detonation point for the most elegant part of us to come forward.Now, those of us who don't come from such a place, we're just bamboozled and Shanghai'ed by the notion of formality, which we kind of eschew. You don't like formality when it comes to celebration, as if these two things are hostile, one to the other. But I'd like you to consider the real possibility that formality is grace under pressure, and that formality is there to give you a repertoire of response that rescues you from the gross limitations of your autobiography.[01:02:00]Next question. I mean, that's the beginning.Chris: Absolutely. Absolutely. Mm-hmm. Thank you once again, Stephen. So alongside the term or concept of "pompe," in which the the guest or stranger was led out of the house or to the entrance of the village, there was also the consideration around the enforcement of hospitality, which you write about in the book. And you write that"the enforcement of hospitality runs the palpable risk of violating or undoing the cultural value it is there to advocate for. Forcing people to share their good fortune with the less fortunate stretches, to the point of undoing the generosity of spirit that the culture holds dear. Enforcement of hospitality is a sign of the eclipse of hospitality, typically spawned by insecurity, contracted self-definition, and the darkening of the [01:03:00] stranger at the door.Instead, such places and times are more likely to encourage the practice of hospitality in subtle generous ways, often by generously treating the ungenerous."And so there seems to be a need for limits placed on hospitality, in terms of the "pompe," the maximum three days in which a stranger can be given hospitality, and concurrently a need to resist enforcing hospitality. This seems like a kind of high-wire act that hospitable cultures have to balance in order to recognize and realize an honorable way of being with a stranger. And so I'm wondering if you could speak to the possibility of how these limits might be practiced without being enforced. What might that look like in a culture that engages with, with such limits, but without prohibitions?Stephen: Mm-hmm. That's a very good question. [01:04:00] Well, I think your previous question was what happened? I think, in a nutshell, and I didn't really answer that, so maybe see how I can use this question to answer the one that you asked before: what happened? So, there's no doubt in my mind that something happened that it's kind of demonstrable, if only with the benefit of hindsight.Audience: Right.Stephen: Or we can feel our way around the edges of the absence of the goneness of that thing that gives us some feel for the original shape of that thing.So you could say I'm trafficking in "ideals," here, and after a fashion, maybe, yeah. But the notion of "ideals," when it's used in this slanderous way suggests that "it was never like that."Chris: Mm-hmm.Stephen: And I suggest to you it's been like that in a lot of places, and there's a lot of places where it's still like that, although globalization [01:05:00] may be the coup de grâce performed upon this capacity. Okay. But anyway.Okay. So what happened? Well, you see in the circumstance that I described, apropos of the stranger, the stranger is in on it. The stranger's principle responsibility is to be the vector for this sort of grandiose generosity coming forward, and to experience that in a burdensome and unreciprocated fashion, until you realize that their willingness to do that is their reciprocity. Everybody doesn't get to do everything at once. You can't give and receive at the same time. You know what that's called? "Secret Santa at school," isn't it?That's where nobody owes nobody nothing at the end. That's what we're all after. I mean, one of your questions, you know, pointed to that, that there's a kind of, [01:06:00] what do you call that, teeter-totter balance between what people did for each other and what they received for each other. Right. And nobody feels slighted in any way, perfect balance, et cetera.Well, the circumstance here has nothing of the kind going with it. The circumstance we're describing now is one in which the hospitality is clearly unequal in terms of who's eating whose food, for example, in terms of the absolutely frustrated notion of reciprocity, that in fact you undo your end of the hospitality by trying to pay back, or give back, or pay at all, or break even, or not feel the burden of "God, you've been on the take for fricking hours here now." And if you really look in the face of the host, I mean, they're just getting started and you can't, you can't take it anymore.[01:07:00]So, one of the ways that we contend with this is through habits of speech. So, if somebody comes around with seconds. They say, "would you like a little more?"And you say, "I'm good. I'm good. I'm good." You see, "I'm good" is code for what? "F**k off." That's what it's code for. It's a little strong. It's a little strong. What I mean is, when "I'm good" comes to town, it means I don't need you and what you have. Good God, you're not there because you need it you knucklehead. You're there because they need it, because their culture needs an opportunity to remember itself. Right?Okay. So what happened? Because you're making it sound like a pretty good thing, really. Like who would say, "I think we've had enough of this hospitality thing, don't you? Let's try, oh, [01:08:00] keeping our s**t to ourselves. That sounds like a good alternative. Let's give it a week or two, see how it rolls." Never happened. Nobody decided to do this - this change, I don't think. I think the change happened, and sometime long after people realized that the change had had taken place. And it's very simple. The change, I think, went something like this.As long as the guest is in on it, there's a shared and mutually-held understanding that doesn't make them the same. It makes them to use the quote from the book "partners," okay, with different tasks to bring this thing to light, to make it so. What does that require? A mutually-held understanding in vivo as it's happening, what it is.Okay. [01:09:00] So, that the stranger who's not part of the host culture... sorry, let me say this differently.The culture of the stranger has made the culture of the host available to the stranger no matter how personally adept he or she may be at receiving. Did you follow that?Audience: A little.Stephen: Okay. Say it again?Audience: Yes, please.Stephen: Okay. The acculturation, the cultured sophistication of the stranger is at work in his or her strangerhood. Okay. He or she's not at home, but their cultural training helps them understand what their obligations are in terms of this arrangement we've been describing here.Okay, so I think the rupture takes place [01:10:00] when the culturation of one side or the other fails to make the other discernible to the one.One more time?When something happens whereby the acculturation of one of the partners makes the identity, the presence, and the valence of the other one untranslatable. Untranslatable.I could give you an example from what I call " the etiquette of trade," or the... what was the word? Not etiquette. What's the other word?Chris: The covenant?Stephen: Okay, " covenant of trade" we'll call it. So, imagine that people are sitting across from each other, two partners in a trade. Okay? [01:11:00] Imagine that they have one thing to sell or move or exchange and somebody has something else.How does this work? Not "what are the mechanics?" That can be another discussion, but, if this works, how does it work? Not "how does it happen?" How does it actually achieve what they're after? Maybe it's something like this.I have this pottery, and even though you're not a potter, but somebody in your extended family back home was, and you watched what they went through to make a fricking pot, okay?You watched how their hands seized up, because the clay leached all the moisture out of the hands. You distinctly remember that - how the old lady's hands looked cracked and worn, and so from the work of making vessels of hospitality, okay? [01:12:00] It doesn't matter that you didn't make it yourself. The point is you recognize in the item something we could call "cultural patrimony."You recognize the deep-runningness of the culture opposite you as manifest and embodied in this item for trade. Okay? So, the person doesn't have to "sell you" because your cultural sophistication makes this pot on the other side available to you for the deeply venerable thing that it is. Follow what I'm saying?Okay. So, you know what I'm gonna say next? When something happens, the items across from you cease to speak, cease to have their stories come along with them, cease to be available. There's something about your cultural atrophy that you project onto the [01:13:00] item that you don't recognize.You don't recognize it's valence, it's proprieties, it's value, it's deep-running worth and so on. Something happened, okay? And because you're not making your own stuff back home or any part of it. And so now, when you're in a circumstance like this and you're just trying to get this pot, but you know nothing about it, then the enterprise becomes, "Okay, so what do you have to part with to obtain the pot?"And the next thing is, you pretend you're not interested in obtaining the pot to obtain the pot. That becomes part of the deal. And then, the person on the making end feels the deep running slight of your disinterest, or your vague involvement in the proceedings, or maybe the worst: when it's not things you're going back and forth with, but there's a third thing called money, which nobody makes, [01:14:00] which you're not reminded of your grandma or anyone else's with the money. And then, money becomes the ghost of the original understanding of the cultural patrimony that sat between you. That's what happened, I'm fairly sure: the advent, the estrangement that comes with the stranger, instead of the opportunity to be your cultural best when the stranger comes.And then of course, it bleeds through all kinds of transactions beyond the "obvious material ones." So, it's a rupture in translatability, isn't it?Chris: You understand this to happen or have happened historically, culturally, et cetera, with matrimony as well?Stephen: Oh, absolutely. Yeah.Yeah. This is why, for example, things like the fetishization of virginity.Audience: Mm-hmm. [01:15:00]Stephen: I think it's traceable directly to what we're talking about. How so? Oh, this is a whole other long thing, but the very short version would be this.Do you really believe that through all of human history until the recent liberation, that people have forever fetishized the virginity of a young woman and jealously defended it, the "men" in particular, and that it became a commodity to trade back and forth in, and that it had to be prodded and poked at to determine its intactness? And this was deemed to be, you know, honourable behavior?Do you really think that's the people you come from, that they would've do that to the most cherished of their [01:16:00] own, barely pubescent girls? Come on now. I'm not saying it didn't happen and doesn't still happen. I'm not saying that. I'm saying, God almighty, something happened for that to be so.And I'm trying to allude to you now what I think took place. Then all of a sudden, the hymen takes the place of the pottery, doesn't it? And it becomes universally translatable. Doesn't it? It becomes a kind of a ghosted artifact of a culturally-intact time. It's as close as you can get.Hence, this allegation of its purity, or the association with purity, and so on. [01:17:00] I mean, there's lots to say, but that gives you a feel for what might have happened there.Chris: Thank you, Stephen. Thank you for being so generous with your considerations here.Stephen: You see why I had to write a book, eh?Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: There was too much bouncing around. Like I had to just keep track of my own thoughts on the matter.But can you imagine all of this at play in the year, oh, I don't know, 2022, trying to put into motion a redemptive passion play called "matrimony," with all of this at play? Not with all of this in my mind, but with all of this actually disfiguring the anticipation of the proceedings for the people who came.Can you imagine? Can you imagine trying to pull it off, and [01:18:00] contending overtly with all these things and trying to make room for them in a moment that's supposed to be allegedly - get ready for it - happy.I should have raised my rates on the first day, trying to pull that off.But anyway.Okay, you go now,Chris: Maybe now you'll have the opportunity.Stephen: No, man. No. I'm out of the running for that. "Pompe" has come and come and gone. Mm.Chris: So, in matrimony, Stephen, you write that"the brevity, the brevity of modern ceremonies is really there to make sure that nothing happens, nothing of substance, nothing of consequence, no alchemy, no mystery, no crazy other world stuff. That overreach there in its scripted heart tells me that deep in the rayon-wrapped bosom of that special day, the modern wedding is scared [01:19:00] silly of something happening. That's because it has an ages-old abandoned memory of a time when a wedding was a place where the Gods came around, where human testing and trying and making was at hand, when the dead lingered in the wings awaiting their turn to testify and inveigh."Gorgeous. Gorgeous.Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: And so I'm curious ifStephen: "Rayon-wrapped bosom." That's not, that's not shabby.Chris: "Rayon-wrapped bosom of that special day." Yeah.So, I'm curious do you think the more-than-human world practices matrimony, and if so, what, if anything, might you have learned about matrimony from the more-than-human world?Stephen: I would say the reverse. I would say, we practice the more-than-human world in matrimony, not that the more-than-human world practices matrimony. We practice them, [01:20:00] matrimonially.Next. Okay. Or no? I just gonna say that, that's pretty good.Well, where do we get our best stuff from? Let's just wonder that. Do we get our best stuff from being our best? Well, where does that come from? And this is a bit of a barbershop mirrors situation here, isn't it? To, to back, back, back, back.If you're thinking of time, you can kind of get lost in that generation before, or before, before, before. And it starts to sound like one of them biblical genealogies. But if you think of it as sort of the flash point of multiple presences, if you think of it that way, then you come to [01:21:00] credit the real possibility that your best stuff comes from you being remembered by those who came before you.Audience: Hmm.Stephen: Now just let that sit for a second, because what I just said is logically-incompatible.Okay? You're being remembered by people who came before you. That's not supposed to work. It doesn't work that way. Right?"Anticipated," maybe, but "remembered?" How? Well, if you credit the possibility of multiple beginnings, that's how. Okay. I'm saying that your best stuff, your best thoughts, not the most noble necessarily. I would mean the most timely, [01:22:00] the ones that seem most needed, suddenly.You could take credit and sure. Why, why not? Because ostensibly, it arrives here through you, but if you're frank with yourself, you know that you didn't do that on command, right? I mean, you could say, I just thought of it, but you know in your heart that it was thought of and came to you.I don't think there's any difference between saying that and saying you were thought of.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: So, that's what I think the rudiments of old-order matrimony are. They are old people and their benefactors in the food chain and spiritually speaking. Old people and their benefactors, the best part of them [01:23:00] willed to us, entrusted and willed to us. So, when you are willing to enter into the notion that old-order matrimony is older than you, older than your feelings for the other person, older than your love, and your commitment, and your willingness to make the vows and all that stuff, then you're crediting the possibility that your love is not the beginning of anything.You see. Your love is the advent of something, and I use that word deliberately in its Christian notion, right? It's the oncomingness, the eruption into the present day of something, which turns out to be hugely needed and deeply unsuspected at the same time.I used to ask in the school, "can you [01:24:00] have a memory of something you have no lived experience of?" I think that's what the best part of you is. I'm not saying the rest of you is shite. I'm not saying that. You could say that, but I am saying that when I say "the best part of you," that needs a lot of translating, doesn't it?But the gist of it is that the best part of you is entrusted to you. It's not your creation, it's your burden, your obligation, your best chance to get it right. And that's who we are to those who came before us. We are their chance to get it right, and matrimony is one of the places where you practice the gentle art of getting it right.[01:25:00] Another decent reason to write a book.Chris: So, gorgeous. Wow. Thank you Stephen. I might have one more question.Stephen: Okay. I might have one more answer. Let's see.Chris: Alright. Would I be able to ask if dear Nathalie Roy could join us up here alongside your good man.So, returning to Matrimony: Ritual, Culture and the Heart's Work. On page 94, [01:26:00] Stephen, you write that"hospitality of the radical kind is

On the 135th episode of the What is a Good Life? podcast, I'm delighted to welcome our guest, Stephen Jenkinson. Stephen is a cultural worker, teacher, author, and ceremonialist. He is the creator and principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School, founded in 2010. He has master's degrees from Harvard University (theology) and the University of Toronto (social work). He's the author of Come of Age, the award-winning Die Wise, Money and the Soul's Desires, and Reckoning (with Kimberly Ann Johnson). His latest book, Matrimony: Ritual, Culture and the Heart's Work, invites readers to contemplate the significance of matrimony, ceremony, and cultural articulation—and how to redeem them for future generations.In this rich conversation, Stephen explores profound questions about life, love, and the nature of existence. The discussion delves into the essence of ceremonies, particularly in matrimony, emphasising the need for meaningful endings and the responsibilities we hold towards future generations. The discussion weaves fate, ancestry, humility, and the call to “proceed as if you're needed” into a meditation on how we might live fully inhabited lives.For Stephen's latest book, Matrimony:To buy your copy: https://orphanwisdom.com/store/matrimony/About the book: https://orphanwisdom.com/books/matrimony/For more of Stephen's work: Website: https://orphanwisdom.com/Contact me at mark@whatisagood.life if you'd like to explore your own lines of self-inquiry through 1-on-1 coaching, my 5-week group courses, or to discuss experiences I create to stimulate greater trust, communication, and connection, amongst your leadership teams.- For the What is a Good Life? podcast's YouTube page: https://www.youtube.com/@whatisagoodlife/videos- My newsletter: https://www.whatisagood.life/- My LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mark-mccartney-14b0161b4/00:01 – Introduction01:37 – The Condition of Pondering06:28 – Roots of Pondering10:16 – The Dream Another World Has of You19:36 – Needed vs Important21:46 – Matrimony and the Presence of the Absence26:00 – Longing and Belonging 31:00 – Modern wedding and the privatisation of love35:47 – The Art of the Ending41:40 – Pompe and the Necessity of Closure43:47 – Ritual as a Gift to the Village45:45 – The White Heat of Possibility51:25 – The Active Witness53:43 – What Is a Good Life for Stephen?

Too many leaders miss the opportunity to have impact when it truly matters: the transformation that takes place when someone feels genuinely heard. This is especially important during turbulent times. It's not just about reacting to a crisis, it's about pausing for a moment to listen deeply. Without it, leaders risk isolation, poor decisions, and missed opportunities.   Martin Farrell, crisis coach and bestselling author of “Good Leaders in Turbulent Times: How to Navigate Wild Waters at Work,” reveals how listening becomes a lifejacket for leaders navigating chaos. Drawing on decades of global experience with organizations like the British Red Cross and UN Climate Change Secretariat, Martin shares the pivotal moments and practical strategies that help leaders spot early warning signs, create safe spaces for tough conversations, and transform crisis into connection and growth.   In this episode, discover the story behind the ‘penny drop' moment, when someone knows they're truly understood. Martin gives insight on subtle warning signs before a crisis occurs and also shares excerpts from 138  pieces of his advice in his book. Learn how mastering listening in turbulent times can turn wild waters into opportunities for lasting impact.   "Do we want to react and retaliate, or do you reflect and respond?" – Martin Farrell   SUPERPOWER Notes: 02:45 – What he realized the time he first noticed the power of listening: Working with coach Nancy Klein for 14 years, where she would listen for an hour and a half with complete presence, even during his silent moments and times of distress 06:30 – The transformative experience of being truly heard: How Nancy Klein's listening created a space where he felt special and important in that moment, demonstrating the profound impact of dedicated attention 08:15 – Supporting leaders in crisis: His work with UK charity chief executives who were at risk of losing their jobs, providing support "until the end of the chapter" through primarily listening rather than advice-giving 11:20 – The power of being present in wild waters: Using the metaphor of someone in wild waters with crocodiles around, and how having someone experienced nearby who won't drown provides crucial support 14:30 – From crisis support to storytelling: How his current work involves interviewing people who've processed their experiences to create anonymous advice for others still in crisis 17:45 – The journey of writing "Good Leaders in Turbulent Times": How the book took eight years to complete with six different manuscripts, and the importance of authentic vulnerability in helping others 22:10 – Career background in civil society: Six decades of working in charitable organizations, from teenage years through international work with UN agencies and climate change initiatives 26:40 – The book's unique structure: Five chapters featuring nine characters over seven years, showing the progression from missing warning signs to integration and wisdom 29:15 – Chapter one - missing the signs: How all the warning signs were present but the characters weren't listening to or acting upon them, using the powerful question "What do you know now that you will discover in a year's time?" 32:50 – Listening to weak signals: The importance of becoming adept at noticing and paying attention to early warning signs before they become crises 35:20 – The 138 pieces of advice: Four categories throughout the book - watch out (red flags), remember this (truths to hold onto), consider this (suggestions for action), and secret sauce (personal stories) 38:45 – Theory U and letting go/letting come: How silence and stillness are essential for touching the source of inner knowledge and emerging possibilities 42:30 – Practical advice for listening to inner signals: Go sit by a river or in a quiet place, use scrap paper for uncensored writing, and allow the process to unfold over 8-9 pages until clarity emerges 46:15 – The "no mud, no lotus" principle: How working with distress and discomfort can produce beautiful outcomes when you know how to process them effectively 48:20 – Developing your support network: The importance of having trusted people around you before crisis hits, and Martin's participation in seven different support groups 51:30 – Live Well, Die Wise grief circles: Creating ceremonial safe spaces with candles, poems, and intentional grounding to allow deep sharing and discovery 53:45 – How to connect with Martin Farrell Key Takeaways:    "My ultimate freedom is to respond to whatever you do to me." – Martin Farrell "Here is someone who had no agenda other than being with them and listening. And that was powerful." – Martin Farrell "Even if you're not naturally interested in other people, you can fake it till you make it. Start being interested, and then you get more interested." – Martin Farrell "Particularly with those who are in distress, that is an enormous gift... I noticed the power of being there. I was going to say just being there, but it's not just, it's being there and being present." – Martin Farrell Notes/Mentions: Nancy Klein (Martin's coach for 14 years)- https://www.timetothink.com/  Theory U and Otto Scharmer's Presencing Institute https://www.presencing.org/theoryu  "Good Leaders in Turbulent Times: How to Navigate Wild Waters at Work" by Martin Farrell: https://mybook.to/GoodLeaders and https://practicalinspiration.com/book/good-leaders-in-turbulent-times Live Well, Die Wise grief circles Deep Adaptation Forum Steven Appleby (illustrator of 41 drawings in the book) Connect with Martin Farrell: Website: https://www.martinfarrell.org/  Substack: https://martin228.substack.com/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/martingfarrell  Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com  Mobile: + 491732340722  contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn Substack listening ALCHEMY newsletter Podcast email: listeningsuperpower@gmail.com  

Dr. Mark Bricca earned degrees in Naturopathic Medicine and Classical Chinese Medicine from the National University of Natural Medicine. A long-time practitioner of Buddhism and a student of Sufism, over time Mark's practice of medicine and his healing work has become less about patients' pathology and test results, and more about encouraging them to lovingly tend to their bodies, as well as helping them find ways to fully open to whatever their life circumstances may be—whether easy or difficult, painful or peaceful. Mark maintains his private practice focused in Integrative and Naturopathic Oncology, in addition to supporting people with a wide range of complex chronic illnesses, particularly those relating to mold exposure, chronic infections, and Mast Cell Activation Syndrome. To learn more about Dr. Mark Bricca's practice visit his website or Facebook Free e-book "A Cliff Notes Guide to Nutrition and Cancer" Watch Dr. Bricca on Episode 6 in the Radical Remission Docuseries. The 10-episode Radical Remission Docuseries is avaible for purchase here on Hayhouse.com  Watch Episode 1 of the Docuseries for free on YouTube  To read more about Steven Jenkinson and the book "Die Wise" mentioned in Dr. Bricca's podcast episode, visit https://orphanwisdom.com. _________ To learn more about the 10 Radical Remission Healing Factors, connect with a certified RR coach or join a virtual or in-person workshop visit www.radicalremission.com. To watch Episode 1 of the Radical Remission Docuseries for free, visit our YouTube channel here.  To purchase the full 10-episode Radical Remission Docuseries visit Hay House Online Learning. To learn more about Radical Remission health coaching with Liz or Karla, Click Here Follow us on Social Media: Facebook  Instagram YouTube _____

This is a special re-release of an episode featuring guest host Jackson Kroopf speaking with the incomparable Kimberly Ann Johnson and Stephen Jenkinson. We're bringing this conversation back to let you know about something special happening this weekend from Stephen Jenkinson and the Orphan Wisdom School: Sanity and Soul: Die Wise 10 Years. Taking place on March 15th and 16th at 10am Pacific, this 6-part online event is a deep dive into the wisdom of death, grief, and the soul, 10 years after the publication of Stephen's transformative book Die Wise. You'll get to experience the depth of Stephen's work in a pretty unique way: through 4 recorded grief counsel sessions with dying people, hearing Stephen practice, in 2025, the kind of work described in Die Wise. Plus, he'll be joined by two brilliant colleagues—a neuroscientist studying human consciousness and a filmmaker exploring the afterlife—to discuss the lasting impact of Die Wise on grief counseling, death doulas, and the way these ideas continue to shape our world. If you want to learn more and register, visit orphanwisdom.com/events. But now, enjoy this conversation from March 2023, following Reckoning at Mt. Madonna. Please do consider gifting yourself or a loved one this upcoming offering, Sanity & Soul that promises to provide some ceremony in these  troubled times in ways only Stephen and the Orphan Wisdom School can. Link: https://orphanwisdom.com/event/die-wise-sanity-and-soul-ten-years-on/   What You'll Here in this Episode: Reflections on witness from retired birth and death workers The value of disillusionment The power of loneliness The proliferation of self pathologizing The complex politics of feelings The religion of western psychology Adolescents grabbing for pop psychology labels The respect in not offering solutions The eagerness to escape from pain while grieving Is love dead? Blessing not as approval but the emergence of something new Marriage as both celebration and loss Matrimony between cultures An only child and single parent inviting in a new husband Building an escape route as you enter a union The no-go zone of contemporary western marriage 15 minute weddings, 15 minute funerals, 15 minute births The cultural casualties of uniformity Being healthy enough to tend to home and neighbor   Links ig @reckoning live Sanity & Soul Sign-Up https://orphanwisdom.com/event/die-wise-sanity-and-soul-ten-years-on/

On this first episode of Season 6, Sarah talks with Csenge Kolozsvari who, along with her four year old daughter, traveled from Montreal to her home village in Hungary to accompany her father on his dying journey. She shares the intimate and personal details of being present to her father's needs during his final weeks. Csenge is an artist and bodyworker. You can reach her here:https://www.thebreathing-room.com/en/homeAnd she mentions this book, Die Wise, by Stephen Jenkinson in our conversation:https://orphanwisdom.com/shop/die-wise/Support the show

In this episode, we explore why hope, while seemingly positive, might actually be keeping you stuck. Drawing inspiration from the slang "sus" (popularized by the game Among Us), we'll dive into how hope can sometimes feel like a trap—suspicious, even. With teachings from Pema Chödrön and Stephen Jenkinson's Die Wise, we'll uncover how clinging to hope can numb us from reality, especially at life's end. Join me as we unpack the idea that letting go of hope could be the key to finding true peace in the present moment.

How do we show up for ourselves when the river of grief threatens to sweep us away? Do you allow space in your life to touch the tender places that pain us? To truly grief for those we have lost? To make peace with death? This is a mini episode on Grief and Grace, as Stephanie Hazel steps in to support Tonielle Christensen, our regular Permaculture Segment host, during her own time of grief. Stephanie explores different cultural practices for working with grief when a loved one dies, and discusses three powerful herbs to support us in times of grief. Stephanie recommends the book 'Die Wise' by Stephen Jenkinson. It's also available as an audio book narrated by the author, which is pretty lovely. *THE ELDER TREE TROVE PATREON COMMUNITY** You can join our Patreon ⁠here⁠ and gain a deeper connection to our podcast. Pay only $2 per week to have access to bonus and often exclusive resources and opportunities- plus support the Elder tree at the same time! To find out more about The Elder Tree visit the website at www.theeldertree.org and donate to the crowdfunding campaign here. You can also follow The Elder Tree on Facebook and Instagram and sign up to the newsletter. Find out more about this podcast and the presenters here. Get in touch with The Elder Tree at: asktheeldertree@gmail.com The intro and outro song is "Sing for the Earth" and was kindly donated by Chad Wilkins.

Howdy! In this episode of Getting Stoned I read from Mr. Stephen Jenkinson's book, Die Wise, a chapter titled, The Tyrant Hope. And also dig a poem by Mr. Robinson Jeffers, titled Post Mortem. Thanks so much for stopping by! Peace & Love, Stone --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/stonepetoskey/message

Maria has over 35 years of experience in service, facilitation and guiding, that she has gained through diverse experiences working around the World. With her training as an End of Life Educator, Nature & Forest Therapy Guide, and Ceremonialist, Maria can assist you in connecting with your life to gain clarity about your priorities, empowering you to make informed decisions. Using end-of-life, advance-care planning, education, and coaching tools, she offers a pragmatic and heart-centered approach to helping others face the reality of their mortality through group workshops and one-to-one sessions. Maria also supports people in facing transitions in their lives - whether it's a job loss, moving, retirement, menopause, pet loss, divorce, or death - planning and guiding Ceremonies to honour these important life events. Recently, she took her own advice and is in the midst of becoming a certified Kitchen Garden Consultant! You can find her at: www.liveanddiewise.com www.naturerx.ca https://www.instagram.com/liveanddiewise/ https://www.instagram.com/naturerx.ca

“We're not trying to be right. We're trying to see if we can see clearly.” In this agile and authentic episode, returning guest Stephen Jenkinson offers a lucid view of the world. How might our understanding of the world change if we approached life with a willingness to see things as they are rather than a need to only affirm that which we desire? Ayana and Stephen journey together to consider what had brought us to this modern time – prompting vital questions about the value of tradition, the importance of strangerhood, the possibility of reckoning, and the meaning of ancestry. Stephen asks questions that disrupt and unsettle the status quo, and perhaps these questions will lead us to the lessons we so deeply need. STEPHEN JENKINSON, MTS, MSW is an author, culture activist, ceremonialist and farmer. He teaches internationally and is the creator and principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School, founded in 2010. With Master's degrees from Harvard University (Theology) and the University of Toronto (Social Work), he has worked extensively with dying people and their families, is a former programme director in a major Canadian hospital and former assistant professor in a prominent Canadian medical school. He is the author of several books including 'Reckoning', 'A Generation's Worth', 'Come of Age', 'Money & the Soul's Desires' and the award-winning 'Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul'. Stephen is the subject of the National Film Board of Canada documentary 'Griefwalker', and 'Lost Nation Road', a behind-the-scenes glimpse into the wheelhouse of a mystery train. Nights of Grief and Mystery world tours, with singer/ songwriter Gregory Hoskins, are odes to wonder, love letters for the willingness to know endings. Music by Nights of Grief and Mystery. Visit our website at forthewild.world for the full episode description, references, and action points.Support the show

Stephen Jenkinson joins us to dive deep into the unspoken subject of death and dying. In this conversation we discuss the societal avoidance of death, the lasting impact of one's dying process, the importance of cultural continuity, and the genuine fear associated with death. Join us as we explore the deep and often challenging aspects of mortality with Stephen Jenkinson.See Stephen on his world tour with Nights of Grief & Mystery: https://www.orphanwisdom.com/nights-of-grief-and-mystery/Read Stephen's latest books 'Reckoning' and 'A Generation's Worth, Spirit Work While the Crisis Reigns' and listen to his music: https://www.orphanwisdom.com/shop/TUNE IN00:00 - Episode trailer06:52 - Why take on the role of the angel of death?11:32 - Why is death so intimidating when it's apart of all of our lives?16:11 - Where does the phobia of death come from?24:14 - Is it a failure of culture or the individual?30:49 - Is death hard because we struggle to surrender?47:43 - Your death doesn't belong to you50:31 - Why do we have to learn how to die?52:34 - Should we keep death at the forefront of our mind to live a full life?1:13:38 - How Stephen remains chipper amongst dense subject matter1:22:25 - Stephen's intention1:27:13 - Stephen's hope for you & humanity01:34:01 - Connect with StephenLISTEN & SUBSCRIBE TO THE PODCASTSpotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2HJCflVnHRDmvNtI8r2a65?si=692723d115ce4ef2/Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/inspired-evolution/id1272090974/CONNECT WITH STEPHEN JENKINSONWebsite: https://www.orphanwisdom.com/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@orphanwisdommedia/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefandmystery/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/orphanwisdom/JOIN THE INSPIRED EVOLUTION COMMUNITYWebsite: https://www.inspiredevolution/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@inspiredevolution/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/inspired_evolution/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/inspiredevolution/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/inspired_evolution/Some of the links in this description are affiliate links. If you make a purchase through these links, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your support helps sustain the content on this channel

I'm thrilled to present to you an incredible episode delving deep into the often uncharted topic of death, our fears surrounding it, and the realm of palliative care with the wise and insightful Stephen Jenkinson. As the author of profound books such as "Die Wise" and "Come of Age," Stephen has transformed our understanding of mortality and the societal roles of elders. We discuss the chances he took in institutional hospital settings and how our western culture has diverted from age-old practices surrounding death. Through our conversation, you'll realize the importance of reconnecting with our roots and gaining a more profound respect for the natural cycle of life. We also delve into some unsettling trends seen in today's society, such as our tendency to remove ourselves from ancestral traditions to form an identity while disconnecting from our heritage. We discuss the concept of elderhood, its vital cultural function, and the loss it has suffered in our modern culture. Stephen also sheds light on the fears of aging and dying and how understanding life's limitations can lead us to better self-improvement. Swimming to the deep end, this episode ventures into the controversial topic of euthanasia's legalization in Canada, examines the impacts of a death-phobic culture, and contemplates suffering and pain as essential parts of our life and death narratives.  DISCLAIMER: This podcast is presented for educational and exploratory purposes only. Published content is not intended to be used for diagnosing or treating any illness. Those responsible for this show disclaim responsibility for any possible adverse effects from the use of information presented by Luke or his guests. Please consult with your healthcare provider before using any products referenced. This podcast may contain paid endorsements for products or services. 00:01:58 — (Re)introducing: Death, Phobias & Palliative Care • Ancestral Amnesia & the Village Mind - Stephen Jenkinson #151 • Read: Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson • How Stephen's path led him to palliative care • Overcoming institutional limitations around death and birth • Taking chances in institutional hospital settings • How the West diverted from historical practices around death 00:11:25 — Inheriting a Ghost Culture and Reconnecting With Our Elders • Pillaging other ancestral traditions to find a sense of identity • Disconnecting from one's own heritage  • Elderhood as a cultural function • The loss of respect for elders in modern society • Read: Come of Age by Stephen Jenkinson • A conversation in Oaxaca City about elderhood • Brief observation around the phobia of aging and dying • Who goes into self improvement to obey the limits of life? • Understanding the limits that have been entrusted in you 00:33:09 — Legalization of Euthanasia in Canada & Dying in the Manner of One's Living • How a death phobic culture masks euthanasia as “Maid Medical Assistance in Dying” • English language has no passive voice for our relationship with God • Anticipatory grief, understanding the verb "to die"  • Finding a way to say goodbye while you still can • Medication as an end-of-life value vs. end-of-life presence • Remembering Aldous Huxley's death involving an LSD journey • Why suffering and pain belong in matters of life and death  • Three teachers that have impacted Stephen's work More about this episode. Watch on YouTube. THIS SHOW IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: QUANTUM UPGRADE. Block harmful EMF with Quantum Upgrade's products. Their products stabilize the energy fields around you and work in the home, at the office, and even in your car. Get a 15 day free trial with code 'LUKE15' atquantumupgrade.io. AND… BIOPTIMIZERS - the makers of Masszymes - are offering a challenge. This month only, get a FREE bottle of this best selling 100% plant-based, naturally-derived digestive enzymes - try and see all of the positive changes of enhanced digestion and nutrient absorption. All you have to do is pay a nominal shipping fee. That's it! Do not miss the opportunity, it is a limited time offer this month only. Get your free bottle at masszymes.com/lukefree with code LUKE10. AND… SILVER BIOTICS. Experience the healing power of Silver Biotics! Their advanced & patented technology can help support your immune system and promote overall wellness. Try it today and see the difference for yourself! Get 30% off when you go to silverbiotics.com and use code LUKE at checkout. AND… ALITURA NATURALS. Your skin is the largest organ and it needs to be treated like another mouth. If you're as careful about what you put on your skin as you are about feeding your body, then you've got to check out my good friend and previous podcast guest's skincare line, Alitura Naturals. Alitura was created out of desperation after it's founder, model, and actor, Andy Hnilo, found his face unrecognizable after getting hit and run over by two cars. Alitura, latin for ‘feeding and nourishing,' was created out if a small studio apartment, purely out of necessity to heal Andy's scarring and abrasions. Carefully sourced with research proven ingredients containing natural, organic, nutrient-rich ingredients that feed and nourish your skin, so you can look as vibrant as you feel. And as a special gift for my listeners, use code “LIFESTYLIST” for 20% off and FREE SHIPPING in the US on your order at alituranaturals.com. Resources: • Website: orphanwisdom.com • Read: Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson • Read: Come of Age by Stephen Jenkinson • Read: Reckoning by Stephen Jenkinson and Kimberly Ann Johnson • Instagram: @griefandmystery • Facebook: Orphan Wisdom • The Nights of Grief & Mystery 2023: orphanwisdom.com/nights-of-grief-and-mystery  • Are you ready to block harmful blue light, and look great at the same time? Check out Gilded By Luke Storey. Where fashion meets function: gildedbylukestorey.com • Join me on Telegram for the uncensored content big tech won't allow me to post. It's free speech and free content: www.lukestorey.com/telegram Related: • The Holistic OBGYN on Conscious Birth & Death Practices & Traditions w/ Dr. Nathan Riley #421 • Somatic Experiencing, Birth, Sex, & Trauma W/ Kimberly Ann Johnson #362 The Life Stylist is produced by Crate Media.

Stephen Jenkinson is a Canadian writer, teacher and grief literacy advocate. He's the author of Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul. He is one of my favorite authors and Die Wise has been so helpful for me. In this episode we discuss my recent experience with death; when my friend Erik died in an avalanche while we were skiing together. I use this time with Stephen in an attempt to be seen and heard, to learn, to share, to heal, to grieve. It was amazing and I hope you enjoy listening in on it. Thank you Stephen, for your time and inquiry and insight. Follow Stephen's work by visiting his website https://orphanwisdom.com Ari's Coaching Page - FREE INTRO CALL https://ariintheair.com/coaching/ Follow me on instagram! https://www.instagram.com/ariintheair Support this channel! $5/Month! Get FREE PARAGLIDE COACHING! https://www.patreon.com/ariintheair 15% OFF QUALIA NOOTROPICS https://neurohacker.com/shop/qualia-mind?rfsn=6736291.51bd0fe Code: ARI (good for 15% off any purchase)

Stephen Jenkinson (Harvard-trained theologian, activist and elder) is an expert in dying. During his 20 years working in “the death trade” he counselled more than 1500 people to their death. He is also the founder of The Orphan Wisdom School, a teaching house for the skills of deep living, he's the subject of the documentary Griefwalker and author of Die Wise: A Manifesto For Sanity and Soul.Stephen's wild idea is that we must learn to die well…so that we can live well. This is a challenging and poetic conversation. We cover euthanasia (it's death-phobic), elderhood (current boomers have failed at it) and not being “too late” to work it all out. Stephen reads from his book A Generation's Worth and we reference his recent books Die Wise and ReckoningYou can get hold of all three at Orphan WisdomStephen is touring his Nights of Grief and Mystery show internationallyIf you need to know a bit more about me… head to my "about" pageSubscribe to my Substack newsletter for more such conversationGet your copy of my book, This One Wild and Precious Life Let's connect on Instagram! It's where I interact the most Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Death & Dying.....I can see why we don't talk about it very much.  It's so gut-wrenching....heartbreak...it's real....and I think we are unsure how to truly express what's going on inside of us as we mourn the transition of a loved one.  And we are unsure how to show up for each other as we grieve.  For me, this is the most difficult 3 months I have ever walked through in my life.  As I have been reading the book DIE WISE by Stephen Jenkinson, I have appreciated his deep insights & encouragement to be real about the dying process we are all walking through.  So here I go.....groaning & crying & expressing to you how I've really been feeling...and how I'm seeking to find my way forward.  Thanks for walking this Earth with me my dear friends, humans, infinite energy beings.  And if you listen in to my reflections....thank you.  Thank you for allowing me to share all of me in this episode 44.22.To connect more with me: FB:  https://www.facebook.com/aaron.lahman.9/IG:  https://www.instagram.com/aaron.lahman/ Thanks for joining us & be sure to Like, Subscribe, Comment, & Share if you feel so moved. We would also love to have you join the OUR HEALING VOICES community on Instagram and Facebook: IG:  https://www.instagram.com/ourhealingvoices/ FB:  https://www.facebook.com/our.healing.voices.podcast **The OUR HEALING VOICES episodes are designed to inform & entertain - not provide medical advice. You should always consult your doctor or healthcare practitioner when it comes to your personal health, or before you start any treatment.**

This week's conversation is between Berry and Canadian culture activist Stephen Jenkinson. His work is really hard to classify. You may have read his conversation with Pierz Newton-John in issue 54 of Dumbo Feather magazine. Stephen has worked extensively with people who are dying, and their families. He's worked in medical care, agriculture, and he's also a canoe builder and sculptor. Stephen's the author of Come of Age and Die Wise. He travels the world performing the Nights of Grief and Mystery Tour, coming to Australia in late 2023.

BJ Miller is an established thought leader in the area of serious illness, end-of-life issues and death. He has been a physician for 19 years and has counseled over 1,000 patients and family members. This vast experience has led him to understand what people really need when dealing with difficult health situations. https://www.mettlehealth.com/@mettle_health ______________________________NEW MUSIC - HEADWATERS LISTEN:  Spotify / Apple / BandcampJoin our COMMUNITY - sign up at EastForest.orgPlease support the show by joining our East Forest COUNCIL on Patreon.  Monthly Council, live-streams, demos, and more. JOURNEY SPACE - founded by East Forest.  Online Journey Facilitation and Support.  JourneySpace.com.EAST FOREST MUSIC: Spotify / AppleGuided Meditations on Spotify & AppleShop: http://eastforest.org★★★★★ Please rate Ten Laws with East Forest in iTunes & SpotifyConnect with the Forest -Mothership: http://eastforest.orgIG:  https://www.instagram.com/eastforest/Facebook: http://facebook.com/eastforestmusic

Stephen Jenkinson is a former palliative care worker, cultural activist,  and master storyteller. He is the author of countless books including “Reckoning”, “A Generation's worth”, and the award-winning “Die Wise”. He is also the co-founder of the “Nights of Grief and Mystery” a musical storytelling ceremony along with Canadian singer/songwriter Gregory Hoskins. What started as an improvisational collaboration has led to an international tour and the release of several records with the two most recent being “Dark Roads” & “Rough Gods”. In this episode, we explore the origins of Stephen's storytelling ability, how “Nights of Grief & Mystery” came to be, how authenticity transforms us, and how our way of living determines our way of dying. 

In this second Dying Your Way interview with Stephen Jenkinson, he shares with podcast host, Claire O'Berry, his take on the last two years and how in the end, death is the common denominator that we all share. “Death means you no harm. Though it means you. You belong to the ending of your days.” This past palliative care provider, poet and philosopher of our time will have you think … and think again … rewind … replay … rewind and replay … and guaranteed think more deeply about our own natural and inevitable progression toward death. Connect with Stephen Jenkinson here: Website: https://orphanwisdom.com/ Links to Some of Stephen's Work:  https://orphanwisdom.com/a-generations-worth-spirit-work-while-the-crisis-reigns/ https://orphanwisdom.com/nights-of-grief-and-mystery/ Videos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H3daU3ZrNpw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9w1MfpoERhE Join the Dying Your Way conversation on our FaceBook group, search for Dying your Way. Or to learn more or contact us go to www.dyingyourway.com. Other links: https://www.dyingyourway.com/facing-death-ebook?r_done=1 https://www.dyingyourway.com/eol-training https://dyingyourway.com/book-a-consultation/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

=> Recommend this show by sharing the link: pod.link/2Pages ‘When a man turns 30, he realizes that his life isn't working.'  I heard this quote when I was in my thirties, and it spoke loudly to the crossroads that often occur at this moment of mid-life. When you hit your fifties, I think the question reappears - you've climbed your mountain, now who do you choose to be beyond that? As I've pondered this, I've been sitting with the idea of stepping into elderhood; the mentor role. Do you have an elder in your life, or are you perhaps being called, like me, to become one?  Stephen Jenkinson is someone I've looked up to as an elder, and he's engaged rudely and briskly, with both life and death, having spent his time counseling dying people and their families. He's a sculptor, a musician, a canoe builder, a sage, and the award-winning author of a favorite book of mine, Die Wise. Get‌ ‌book‌ ‌links‌ ‌and‌ ‌resources‌ ‌at‌ https://www.mbs.works/2-pages-podcast/  Stephen Jenkinson reads Seamus Heaney's poem, ‘From the Republic of Conscience.' [reading begins at 15:40]  Hear us discuss:  “You have to acknowledge many things about your own life that you're less than thrilled about or proud of.” [19:35] | The nature of written law: “Lawfulness, in my mind, is principally predicated on obedience, not discernment.” [22:26] | The difference between grief and grievance: “One of the ways by which you know you are deeply and irreconcilably alive is having a capacity for grief - not to endure it, but to practise it.”  [27:21] | How to identify your burden. [33:02] | Deciding when to say ‘yes.' [37:39]

Stephen Jenkinson is an all-around renaissance man. He plays many roles including author, poet, storyteller, cultural activist, and farmer. Stephen received a master's in theology from Harvard and a masters in social work from the University of Toronto. He is the subject of a film called “Griefwalker” which documents his experience as a palliative care worker. He has written a handful of books including the award-winning “Die Wise” which explores our culture's relationship to dying. In this episode, we speak about what people are really afraid of when it comes to death, what it means to carry the dead, why hope is hopeless & how to be with the dying. 

The only inevitable thing in this life is death. Today we have an episode full of questions, with answers that will make you think deeper and ask for a better question. This episode will undoubtedly make you appreciate every second you spend alive and make you feel better about death. All of us, at some point in our lives, have been afraid of death. Today's guest, Stephen Jenkinson, will drop a bomb of knowledge that will blow our minds and change our point of view about this controversial topic. ABOUT STEPHEN JENKINSON He is an activist, teacher, author, and farmer. He has a master's degree in theology from Harvard University and a master's degree in social work from the University of Toronto. Formerly a program director at a major Canadian hospital and medical-school assistant professor, Stephen is now a sought-after workshop leader, speaker, and consultant to palliative care and hospice organizations. He is the founder of The Orphan Wisdom School in Canada and the subject of the documentary film Griefwalker. CONNECT WITH STEPHEN Orphan Wisdom Website Book: Come of Age Orphan Wisdom Shop WHAT YOU WILL HEAR: [5:14] Why are we so afraid of death? [12: 41] How to be a human? [19:33] The downside of living forever. [22:10] The near future of humanity. [28:30] The characterization of losing someone. [37:20] The importance of having a good death. [45:02] What does a wise death bring? [51:45] Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul. If you look at the civilized world and think, "no thank you," then you should subscribe to our podcast so you don't miss a single episode! Also, join the uncivilized community, connect with me on my website and Instagram so you can join in on our live recordings, ask questions to guests, and more. This episode is sponsored by Zensquatch Apparel. Checkout www.Zensquatch.com and use promo code " UNcivilized " for 20% off your purchases AND FREE SHIPPING for the month of August 2021. Find Traver on Instagram @traverBoehm Get a copy my book, Man UNcivilized Start your journey to become the man the that the world failed to teach you how to be.

Fully processing our emotions and grief requires complete honesty. With the rise of positive-all-the-time spiritual influencers, Stephen Jenkinson's message is a heartfelt reminder that reality is preferable to false hope. As an accomplished author, speaker, musician, and storyteller, Stephen's sage wisdom around understanding death and living with love are ultra important in this chaotic age. We also talk about parenting, cross-generational dialog, and the true meaning of being awakened.  Highlights:   Is it guaranteed that life will be better after the pandemic?  Why behavior is the best indicator of our beliefs. How can you employ the understanding of your own mortality? Is it too late for humanity to course correct? Can optimism and hopefulness be taken too far? Why “the times we require that we be faithful as witnesses, not as advocates” - Stephen Jenkinson Why our children are the result of the fullness of our parenting, not just the best moments. How does cross-generational dialog help society function? What is the true meaning of being awakened? Connect with Stephen:   Website | Orphanwisdom.com - Check out his book “Die Wise”, sign up for his newsletter, check out his music, and more!! Rising Man Links:   Elements | 3 Day Wilderness Immersion for men ready to reconnect with the wild man inside. Next event is 6/25-6/27 in CA!   Ignite | Use summerheat30 for a 30% discount, expires midnight PST on 6/18/21! 12 week online program designed to ignite your purpose and propel you into freedom. Features weekly calls, online modules, growth assignments, and community support!    Fire Circles | Are you ready to join other men JUST LIKE YOU who have found a way to RISE ABOVE life's challenges and create a life of purpose and fulfillment?   Initiation | Compass Program - 4 day 4 night Vision Fast in the wilderness, with preparation and incorporation calls in the months before and after.    Website | RisingMan.org   Instagram | @risingmanmovement Instagram | @jeddyazuma   YouTube | The Rising Man Movement - featuring videos of each Monday Morning Meditation episode!

Culture activist, teacher, author ~ Stephen Jenkinson teaches internationally and is the creator and principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School, co-founded with Nathalie Roy in 2010, convening semi-annually in Deacon, Ontario, and in northern Europe. He has Master's degrees from Harvard University (Theology) and the University of Toronto (Social Work). Apprenticed to a master storyteller when a young man, he has worked extensively with dying people and their families, is a former program director in a major Canadian hospital, former assistant professor in a prominent Canadian medical school. He is also a sculptor, traditional canoe builder whose house won a Governor General's Award for architecture. Since co-founding Nights of Grief and Mystery with Gregory Hoskins in 2015, he has toured this musical/tent show revival/storytelling/ceremony of a show across North America, the U.K. and Europe, and Australia and New Zealand. He is the author of Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble (2018), the award-winning Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul (2015), Homecoming: The Haiku Sessions (a live teaching from 2013), How it All Could Be: A workbook for dying people and those who love them (2009), Angel and Executioner: Grief and the Love of Life – (a live teaching from 2009), and Money and The Soul's Desires: A Meditation (2002). He is contributing author to Palliative Care – Core Skills and Clinical Competencies (2007). Stephen Jenkinson is also the subject of the feature-length documentary film Griefwalker (National Film Board of Canada, 2008, dir. Tim Wilson), a portrait of his work with dying people, and Lost Nation Road, a shorter documentary on the crafting of the Nights of Grief and Mystery tours (2019, dir. Ian Mackenzie). His books, recordings and DVDs are available for purchase at the Orphan Wisdom Shop: https://orphanwisdom.com Watch the Lost Nation Road documentary here: https://orphanwisdom.com/lost-nation-road --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/longdistancelovebombs/message

Culture activist, worker, author ~ Stephen teaches internationally and is the creator and principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School, co-founded the school with his wife Nathalie Roy in 2010, convening semi-annually in Deacon, Ontario, and in northern Europe. He has Master's degrees from Harvard University (Theology) and the University of Toronto (Social Work). Apprenticed to a master storyteller when a young man, he has worked extensively with dying people and their families, is former programme director in a major Canadian hospital, former assistant professor in a prominent Canadian medical school. He is also a sculptor, traditional canoe builder whose house won a Governor General's Award for architecture. Since co-founding the Nights of Grief and Mystery project with singer/ songwriter Gregory Hoskins in 2015, he has toured this musical/ tent show revival/ storytelling/ ceremony of a show across North America, U.K. and Europe and Australia and New Zealand. They released their Nights of Grief & Mystery album in 2017 and at the end of 2020, they released two new records; Dark Roads and Rough Gods. He is the author of Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble (2018), the award-winning Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul (2015), Homecoming: The Haiku Sessions (a live teaching from 2013), How it All Could Be: A workbook for dying people and those who love them (2009), Angel and Executioner: Grief and the Love of Life – (a live teaching from 2009), and Money and The Soul's Desires: A Meditation (2002). He was a contributing author to Palliative Care – Core Skills and Clinical Competencies (2007). Stephen Jenkinson is also the subject of the feature length documentary film Griefwalker (National Film Board of Canada, 2008, dir. Tim Wilson), a portrait of his work with dying people, and Lost Nation Road, a shorter documentary on the crafting of the Nights of Grief and Mystery tours (2019, dir. Ian Mackenzie). His books, recordings and DVDs are available for purchase at the Orphan Wisdom Shop.

Spontaneous poet, culture activist, and shamanic bard Stephen Jenkinson joins Terry to explore the totally disarming ordeal of bearing witness to death up close — both our individual mortality and our collective mortality. They also drop into felt contact with Terry’s present, uncertain situation — recently on his 70th birthday, Terry was suddenly informed that there was probably metastatic cancer in his lungs and he spent five nights in the hospital undergoing a series of tests. Now, almost a month later, there is still no clarifying diagnosis, prognosis, or treatment plan, so he’s learning to be in radical not-knowing, returning to the miracle of this moment, and this breath.  Stephen meets Terry in his characteristic uncompromising way, with tenderness, unflinching clarity, and humor. They wonder together about the overwhelming nature of beauty, and the vividness that dying well can bring to the living. Ultimately, they both confess that after decades and careers of practice, neither of them claim to be fully prepared for their own dying process. Its nature is to break us open. Even so, they both deepen in grief and gratitude, and learn to open unconditionally. As Stephen says, we can “get better at missing it” before life is gone. Stephen Jenkinson is an activist, teacher, author, farmer and performing poet. He is the founder of the Orphan Wisdom School in Tramore, Canada and the author of four books, including Die Wise and Come of Age: The Case of Elderhood in a Time of Trouble. He’s also the subject of a documentary film Griefwalker. In 2015, Stephen created Nights of Grief & Mystery with Canadian singer-songwriter Gregory Hoskins. With a 5-piece band, they have mounted international tours and released three albums, most recently DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS. They hope to begin performing again in June — make contact on his website to see if you might be able to attend. Most recently, a four-part livestream speaking series, A Generation’s Worth, was presented in Winter 2020.  For more information on Stephen Jenkinson and Terry Patten, check out the following resources: Stephen’s two new records, DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS Nights of Grief and Mystery World Tour Stephen’s teaching school, Orphan Wisdom Stephen’s recording partner Gregory Hoskins Stephen’s Upcoming Events Stephen’s books, Die Wise, Come of Age, How It All Could Be, and Money and the Soul’s Desires State of Emergence podcast website Terry Patten’s nonprofit, A New Republic of the Heart Terry Patten’s personal website Join Us as a “Friend of State of Emergence” We hope you appreciate this week’s episode with Stephen Jenkinson. If you would like to support our podcast, we invite you to become a “Friend of State of Emergence” by making a small monthly donation. As a supporter, you will also receive invitations to our monthly Q&A events, when we explore recent episodes in greater depth. If you’d like to help the podcast continue and become sustainable, simply register as a Friend of State of Emergence on our website. A vibrant community is gathering and we’d love for you to be part of it.

This is a segment of episode #289 of Last Born In The Wilderness “Love Is Limitation: Disillusionment & Obligation In Troubled Times w/ Stephen Jenkinson.” Listen to the full episode: http://bit.ly/LBWjenkinson3 Learn more about and purchase DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS: http://bit.ly/DarkRoadsRoughGods Stephen Jenkinson, author of ‘Die Wise’ and ‘Come of Age,’ returns to the podcast to discuss love, or how we commonly understand love to be, versus what love really is and is practiced, and what it asks of us in the time allotted to us on this earth. Intersecting with Stephen's work in the "death trade" and his interrogation of the death-phobic culture of the United States and Canada, he frames our exploration of love within the deeper understanding of how limits make us human. Stephen Jenkinson, MTS, MSW is an activist, teacher, author, and farmer. He is the founder of the Orphan Wisdom School in Tramore, Canada and the author of four books, including ‘Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul,’ the award-winning book about grief and dying, and the great love of life, and ‘Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble.’ In 2015, he created Nights of Grief & Mystery with Canadian singer-songwriter Gregory Hoskins. With a 5-piece band, they have mounted international tours and released three albums, most recently DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS. Most recently, a four-part livestream speaking series, STONE FENCE SAGAS, were presented in Fall 2020. WEBSITE: https://www.lastborninthewilderness.com PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/lastborninthewilderness DONATE: https://www.paypal.me/lastbornpodcast / https://venmo.com/LastBornPodcast BOOK: http://bit.ly/ORBITgr ATTACK & DETHRONE: https://anchor.fm/adgodcast DROP ME A LINE: Call (208) 918-2837 or http://bit.ly/LBWfiledrop EVERYTHING ELSE: https://linktr.ee/patterns.of.behavior

[Intro: 13:25 | Outro: 1:17:23] Stephen Jenkinson, author of ‘Die Wise’ and ‘Come of Age,’ returns to the podcast to discuss what he and musical collaborator Gregory Hoskins have been up to since their Nights of Grief and Mystery global tour was cancelled when coronavirus lockdowns began last year. Released in November, they put together two albums, DARK ROAD and ROUGH GODS. “In the idleness that’s been forced upon us we’ve made two records. I learned this: music is human scaled miracle. “They call it fishing, not catching. That’s because, though there may be fish galore in the places you can’t see, none of them are in the world to satisfy your hook, and mostly they don’t come. I don’t really know where these records came from, but I know they came to two men willing to sit quietly for hours upon days, keeping their faithless wits about them, paying attention, paying for it. We’ve been often quizzed at the border: what do you do? what kind of music? what’s with the Grief and Mystery thing? Palms up, shrugging: that’s an honest answer.” (http://bit.ly/DarkRoadsRoughGods) In discussing this subject, we move into a conversation about love, or how we commonly understand love to be, versus what love really is and is practiced, and what it asks of us in the time allotted to us on this earth. Intersecting with Stephen's work in the "death trade" and his interrogation of the death-phobic culture of the United States and Canada, he frames our exploration of love within the deeper understanding of how limits make us human. Stephen Jenkinson, MTS, MSW is an activist, teacher, author, and farmer. He is the founder of the Orphan Wisdom School in Tramore, Canada and the author of four books, including ‘Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul,’ the award-winning book about grief and dying, and the great love of life, and ‘Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble.’ In 2015, he created Nights of Grief & Mystery with Canadian singer-songwriter Gregory Hoskins. With a 5-piece band, they have mounted international tours and released three albums, most recently DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS. Most recently, a four-part livestream speaking series, STONE FENCE SAGAS, were presented in Fall 2020. Episode Notes: - Learn more about and purchase DARK ROADS and ROUGH GODS: http://bit.ly/DarkRoadsRoughGods / https://orphanwisdom.com/shop/dark-roads / https://orphanwisdom.com/shop/rough-gods - Learn more about Stephen’s work: https://orphanwisdom.com - The songs featured are “Invocation” and “Bittersweet” from ROUGH GODS. - To contact Hannah Dwyer about her Friend Farm invitation, you can email or DM her on Instagram: dwyer96@gmail.com  / https://www.instagram.com/hannahrdwyer - Read her article ‘Magic Can Create a Decolonial Future' at Gods&Radicals Press: http://bit.ly/3uL0k9m WEBSITE: https://www.lastborninthewilderness.com PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/lastborninthewilderness DONATE: https://www.paypal.me/lastbornpodcast / https://venmo.com/LastBornPodcast BOOK: http://bit.ly/ORBITgr ATTACK & DETHRONE: https://anchor.fm/adgodcast DROP ME A LINE: Call (208) 918-2837 or http://bit.ly/LBWfiledrop EVERYTHING ELSE: https://linktr.ee/patterns.of.behavior

Stephen Jenkinson! Stephen is a 66yo teacher, author, story-teller, and musician. I met Stephen first through his incredible book, Die Wise, and truly enjoyed this conversation with a man who has spent time in the trenches and has already forgotten more about death than I will likely learn in my remaining life. During this conversation, he appropriately eviscerates the premise of the four prompts, we discuss how right/wrong is meaningless in the context of fulfilling the wolf’s role, and how advanced directives are a final grasp at control and autonomy.I hope you enjoy! :)

Rahoita podcastin tekoa Patreonissa. Pienikin tuki auttaa! https://www.patreon.com/soinnunmaanhenry Podcastin 46. jakson vieraana filosofian opiskelija Anssi Pitkänen. Jakso taltioitiin 23.09.2020. Videoversio: https://youtu.be/wIK8Tu8Dn0c RSS: http://feeds.soundcloud.com/users/soundcloud:users:358481639/sounds.rss Huomioita: - Mainitsemani Sinuhen hallitsija ei ole Ekhnateton vaan Ekhnaton. - Jos tuntuu vaikealta seurata ajatusta keskustelun palatessa tietämisen muotoihin kohdassa 03:16:41, se johtunee paskasta leikkauksesta, jolla poistin epäkoherentin keskustelupätkän sillä seurauksella, että muutakin olennaista meni. Koska jakson rendaaminen ja uploadaaminen kestää käytännössä kokonaisen vuorokauden, en asian huomattuani jaksanut enää alkaa säätää vaan päätin hyväksyä kankeuden. Esimerkkini kohdassa 03:17:18 koskee siis nimenomaisesti näkökulmatietoa. Jaksossa käsiteltyjä teemoja: 00:00:00 Esittely. 00:01:37 Viisaus, loogisuus, älykkyys ja rationaalisuus. 00:36:26 Merkityksellisyys ja vaikeiden asioiden kohtaaminen. 01:14:01 Ahdistus. Rajojen vetäminen. Heuristiikat. 01:45:43 Trauma. Puukotus. 02:17:41 Trauma henkisissä yhteisöissä. Psykedeelit. 02:37:11 Muuntuneet tajunnantilat ja tietämisen muodot. Tehokkuus ja resilienssi. 03:16:41 John Vervaeke ja Erich Fromm. Etapit ja motivaatio. 03:55:04 Merkityskriisi, heimoutuminen ja selonluonti. 04:26:00 Viisautta kehittävien instituutioiden ja rakenteiden kehittäminen. Vanhimmuus. 04:42:10 Loppukysymykset. Lisäksi: • Oleellisuustodentaminen • Perheyhtäläisyys • Hiljainen tieto • Improvisaatio • Paskapuhe • Itsepetos • Individuaatio • Myötätunto • Uteliaisuus • Transformatiivinen oikeus • Maadoittuminen • Synkronisiteetti • Harjoittelu • Informaatioekologia • Äärimmäistyminen • Oivallus Linkkejä keskustelun tiimoilta: • Awakening From the Meaning Crisis -luentosarja https://bit.ly/3ll9aoC • Robert A. Heinleinin kirja The Moon is a Harsh Mistress https://bit.ly/2Vh9MRt • David Chapmanin Meaningness https://meaningness.com/ • Vervaeken meditaatiokurssi https://bit.ly/3qcmIGm • Robert Anton Wilsonin kirja Prometheus Rising https://bit.ly/3mlpnv3 • Bessel van der Kolkin kirja The Body Keeps the Score https://bit.ly/2Vo1Iy9 • Anne Wagnerin luento MDMA-pariterapiasta https://bit.ly/3o4NeQj • Johannes Wilbertin kirja Tobacco and Shamanism in South America https://bit.ly/3qckrer • L.A. Paulin kirja Transformative Experience https://bit.ly/37i0Wsh • Mikko Silventoinen podcastissa https://bit.ly/3fWA3y4 • Daniel Schmachtenberger ja informaatioekologian saastuminen https://bit.ly/2HPocVJ • Psykedeelit ja kristityt -podcastsarja (jaksot 5–8) https://bit.ly/2HOXdto • Stephen Jenkinsonin kirja Die Wise https://bit.ly/36lACOQ • Anssin verkkosivu https://www.eudaimoniavalmennus.fi/ • Anssin sähköposti anssi@eudaimoniavalmennus.fi ----- Ihmisiä, siis eläimiä -podcast rakastaa ymmärrystä avartavia näkökulmia. Syvän tiedonjanon ajaman ohjelman visiona on luoda asioiden ytimeen pureutuvaa, hitaampaa mediaa. Podcastin keskeisiä teemoja ovat tiede ja taide, tavallinen ja erikoinen, yksilö ja yhteiskunta sekä ihminen ja muu luonto. Ohjelman vetäjä, ymmärrykseltään keskeneräinen mutta utelias Henry Soinnunmaa on muusikko, kirjoittaja ja amatöörigeneralisti. • Facebook: https://facebook.com/ihmisiis • Twitter: https://twitter.com/ihmisiis • Instagram: https://instagram.com/ihmisiis • Youtube: https://youtube.com/ihmisiis • Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/ihmisiis • Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2MLqNQE Tilan ja mikit podcastille tarjosi Suomen kattavin ääninäyttelijäpankki Audiospot, https://www.audiospot.fi

Looking for a break from violence, plague, and crazy people this holiday season? If not, too bad! Team Hottest Hell Presents ditches the human fuckery and spends Episode 8 diving into the far more uplifting topic of Near Death Experiences, aka NDEs. Hear the fascinating stories of Carl Jung, Anita Moorjani, and Dr. Tony Cicoria, who all crossed the veil and came back with vital lessons from “The Other Side.” (Kimberly also shares details from her own NDE back in 2017, which was similarly informative.) Our hosts are joined by professional death workers Alex Harvey and Laurie Rae Dietrich, two cultural badasses who help the terminally ill and their families process grief and transition without fear. Is there really a way to break free of the crippling anxiety most people experience around death? What's the inheritance all parents need to leave behind to their children? Are NDE’s just some hippie nonsense? Hit play and find out: To read that article on how Western medicine ruined childbirth for women: https://medium.com/@Kimberly_Kaye/forgotten-history-how-white-ego-drove-black-women-out-of-childbeds-5dc3ef04e62d To support the show/hear that wild story about Joel Michael Guy Jr: www.patreon.com/hottesthellpresents To listen to “Die Wise,” that book the guests recommend: https://www.audible.com/pd/Die-Wise-Audiobook/B01H7DBV3W?source_code=GPAGBSH0508140001&ipRedirectOverride=true&gclid=Cj0KCQiAqo3-BRDoARIsAE5vnaL5B5rPPUaZ_oz_6SB5auTb15N6P33rSHdG82zrlEHdJOP_QatEWgYaAoOfEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/hottesthellpresents)

Hello all you beautiful people! Welcome to Episode of 18 of Getting Stoned with your host Stone Petoskey. Coming at you today with my usual riff on life and then we jump into a reading from the incredible book Die Wise by Mr. Stephen Jenkinson (a must read imo) and I do a new tune of mine titled, Keep On Running. As always I send an immense amount of gratitude and appreciation your way for taking the time to drop on by for a listen! Peace, Love and Rock & Roll, Stone --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/stonepetoskey/message

This interview with Stephen Jenkinson is required listening … not once … not twice, but three times. It is a hard realization to accept all our concepts about death, and the culture around the dying have been squandered to remove us from life’s greatest lesson … how to die.Stephen is an author of numerous books, like Die Wise and Come of Age:The Case of Elderhood in a Time of Trouble. He has a Master’s degree from Harvard University in theology and a Master’s degree in sociology from the University of Toronto. After many years as programme director for palliative care counselling he has been at the bedside of hundreds of dying patients. He has taught internationally as part of the Orphan Wisdom School and toured with Nights of Grief and Mystery to sold out crowds. He is a profound thinker of our time, a cultural activist, musician, poet, and Canadian farmer.Find out more about Stephen Jenkinson and download his music here - The Orphan Wisdom School &Nights of Grief & Mystery Join the Dying Your Way conversation on our FaceBook group, search for Dying your Way. Or to learn more or contact us go to www.dyingyourway.com.

Cindy MacMillan: (00:00) This is Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast episode 17. I’m Cindy MacMillan and today’s guest is Lynn Principe Golden. Welcome to Exploring the Seasons of Life, a podcast for women with a big heart on a spiritual journey. Each week, join Cindy MacMillan as she interviews coaches, spiritual explorers and celebrants from all walks of life about beginnings, endings and the messy bits in-between. Self-love, well-being, and mindset are at the heart of our conversations because once you change the inside, the outside will begin to change as well.  Cindy MacMillan: (00:00) Welcome back to Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast. Thank you for listening and get ready...it's time to hear some words of wisdom from today's guest. Cindy MacMillan: (00:00) Lynn Principe Golden is an End of Life Doula, Hospice volunteer and Life-Cycle Celebrant. She is the owner of Dearly Beloved Life LLC and is passionate about rites of passage, and believes that like birth, death should be held as a sacred event. She is certified through the Conscious Dying Institute where she is currently working towards being a Conscious Dying Educator. She lives in Dunedin, Florida with her 2 teenagers. Lynn Principe Golden: (01:23) Thank you so much, Cindy. I'm very excited to be here. Cindy MacMillan: (01:27) This is a really interesting subject to me, so yes, I'm excited to have you here, but I do want to start off with my signature question and that is what does exploring the seasons of life mean to you personally or in your business? Lynn Principe Golden: (01:43) That's a great question, where I stand now, I'm entering a new phase in my life and I'm nearing 50. I'm newly divorced, and I have children that are mostly grown. And what I realized is I'm becoming more clear about who I am and what matters most to me. And what I know is that I no longer have an end game. I don't have a place where I feel like, you know, when I think as young women, when we're in our twenties, we think, well, by 30, I want to be married or we have all of these to-do lists and I feel free because I no longer have those. So I'm in this space where I'm becoming more present and I'm living a life for myself rather than the one that I perceived was meant for me. So that's been very freeing. And as far as being an end of life doula exploring the seasons of life is really vital to our work. Lynn Principe Golden: (02:31) And I feel strongly that our dying is a rite of passage. Like you said, like birth, and it's a sacred event. It's a time to ask yourself different questions like what's given my life meaning or who do I need to forgive in order to feel more at peace? How do I want to be remembered? And these are conversations that are important to have simply because we're not guaranteed to live a long life into old age. So it's a great question. And believe me, I am a lot of fun to have at dinner parties because I love to get deep into these, these questions that you're asking. Cindy MacMillan: (03:04) That was a beautiful way of explaining the seasons. So thank you. And I really do want to hear about your journey of becoming an end of life doula. But first, can you just tell us what is an end of life doula? Lynn Principe Golden: (03:18) I would love to, it's not a simple answer because it does encompass a few things. So an end of life doula provides non-medical support and comfort to a dying person and their families; so much like a birth doula provides at the time leading up to birth and during the birth process. We advocate for the needs and wishes of our dying patients. An end of life doula provides education and guidance as well as spiritual, emotional and practical care from as early as initial terminal diagnosis through bereavement. So within the diagnosis through bereavement, there are many steps that we'll walk alongside you with. And the three main aspects of the doulas role are before death planning, bedside vigil and after death care. And the planning phase I'll work with my clients to identify their vision for what they want their last months, weeks, and days to be like we take into account their current reality. Lynn Principe Golden: (04:15) And then together we create action steps. So that practical, emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental directives are in place. So it's not just the advanced directives that we're used to, you know, going to the lawyer and who gets what; it goes a lot deeper than that. And the second aspect of my work, and to me, the most sacred part is sitting bedside during active and imminent death. This can be done alongside family members and friends, or to give them a rest. And these visits can include prayerful companionship, touch, the easing of breath, relaxation, forgiveness. And lastly, an end of life doula can help with after-death body care and rituals according to their care plan and their values, many wish to die at home. And all over the country, people are starting to change that conversation and become more interested in green burials, home funerals, and a lot of alternatives out there, and we can help provide information and support so that those things are possible. Cindy MacMillan: (05:14) Thank you, Lynn, when you were talking about talking with your clients about the last few months of their life, you're not necessarily talking about what their ideas for a funeral per se, but it's really about what those last few months are going to look like in terms of that holistic look. Right? Lynn Principe Golden: (05:34) Exactly. And that can include the funeral planning and that's something that I'm also a Life-Cycle Celebrant, so I can have those conversations, but that may, under the realm of the spiritual, that may be something that they want to make sure it's included. Maybe there are certain prayers or songs that are really meaningful to them. And those are the times we'd have those conversations. And that way the people that need to know the information we'll have that before the time comes. Cindy MacMillan: (06:01) Yeah, I was going to ask you a little bit later, but maybe right now is a good time. I had read, a survey, that said that 92% of Americans say it's important to discuss their wishes for end of life care. And only 32% have had that conversation. So how do you start that conversation? And I'm assuming you start that conversation, not necessarily with the client, but their family, or would it be with a client? Lynn Principe Golden: (06:30) Well that's actually a really hard question. I want to back up a little bit. I think that we live in a death-denying culture and I hear people say things like if I die one day, rather than when I die. and part of the issue is, Stephen Jenkinson wrote a book called Die Wise, which I love, he talks about death as being treated as a failure of medicine rather than of a sacred rite of passage. And so we've turned over, what's been innate in all of us and knowing how to care for our dying and respecting the cycle of life. We've turned it over to science. And so the medical model is greatly built to treat and save and cure, which is wonderful. And they do amazing things. But sometimes at the expense of providing curative treatments that can greatly decrease a patient's quality of life and the time that they have left. Lynn Principe Golden: (07:19) And so back to your question, it should be happening more often in the medical training that doctors and nurses receive. That's first of all, another piece of this is examining our language around illness. You know, often we refer to people who have a terminal illness and are being treated, especially with cancer patients, we use the words fighting. So these patients are fighting cancer as if only the brave and the best fighters can win. So we set them up to either succeed or fail. I mean, you know, that cancer does not fight fair. And so we put judgment on someone who's dying and expecting them to fight harder or not give up. When we set them up, we feel, they feel they've disappointed us somehow, if they lose the battle, quote, unquote, Stephen Jenkinson also talks about the idea that at the end of life, people are willing to do a lot of treatment that may be harmful because they want "More Time". Lynn Principe Golden: (08:13) And he uses the words that are "More Time is now". And I think about that a lot, you know, he asks the question, what are you going to do with your More Time? And so back to what you asked me, I think that those conversations can start really simply you can be asking, you know, where would you like to be buried? Or who do you want there at your bedside? Or where, where do you see yourself dying are simple questions that can start the conversation. And another thing that I think is really important, especially if we have elders that are still in our lives is to ask them a lot of questions, have them tell and retell their stories, ask them what do they regret? And what's given their life meaning so that we do have those deeper conversations and the doors opened. So they feel like the conversations are possible. Cindy MacMillan: (09:02) Thank you for going through that I really and truly feel those conversations are needed. Maybe even before we get to the end of our lives. Lynn Principe Golden: (09:13) I think we should talk about them with our children. Yes. Cindy MacMillan: (09:18) Can you share your story on how you became an end of life doula? Lynn Principe Golden: (09:23) I'd be glad to, it's a winding road, as most of our stories are. So I come from a large close-knit family and I grew up in the Maryland DC area. And to us family was everything. Our gatherings were large and multi-generational often including great aunts and uncles, cousins, all of our grandparents. So it wasn't until, so it wasn't unusual, I should say that when I moved to Florida 16 years ago, I had a great aunt and uncle that lived here. I moved here with my then-husband and my two young children. My Aunt Mary and Uncle Frank never had children so I started visiting with them. They lived in a condo in St. Pete; it was a tidy and perfectly preserved 1960s condo. Mary, she was a sweet Italian woman, she doted on my children, filled them with sweets. Lynn Principe Golden: (10:16) And then there was her husband, Uncle Frank, and he barely concealed his irritation with my rambunctious children. And they had been married for many years and I can say that Mary was truly a Saint. Mary's health began to fade she was admitted to a hospital, then rehab center. I started visiting more often with the purpose of reporting back to my family up North, about how she was doing. And we became really close in those last weeks. It was really the first time I'd been close to the dying process and she let me in and she let me accompany her on that path. She shared with me the mysteries that she was experiencing, the relief of never having to cook for Frank again, the pain that she was experiencing. And it was a really beautiful and profound experience to be there with her. Lynn Principe Golden: (11:09) I was inspired to become a hospice volunteer and a Reiki practitioner. And after Aunt Mary died, I inherited Uncle Frank. So, sharing all of the stories and challenges of being the caretaker to my Uncle Frank would be a whole nother podcast. Cindy MacMillan: (11:24) Okay. We'll have you back for that. Lynn Principe Golden: (11:27) Some good stories for sure. I will give you my short version. I cared for him for the next seven years until his death at the age of 94. And he was an intense and complicated man. He was sharp-minded, sharp-tongued, and he demanded that he make his own decisions. At one point, I had convinced him to move into assisted living because he had fallen a few times. He hated every minute of it and he said to me the words, I'll never forget, Lynn, I'm being treated like a potted plant. Cindy MacMillan: (12:02) Hmm. Lynn Principe Golden: (12:04) So caring for him, it asked a lot of me, but he taught me what dying with dignity meant. He loved me deeply, which I know then, and I know now, and I credit him for showing me what I'm capable of doing. That I'm capable of doing hard things. And he often said to me, Lynn, you've got grit kid. And ultimately this work found me. I believe I had the opportunity to plan a few funerals for family members and was deeply interested in the power of words and rituals. And a few years after Frank's death, I came across the work of Alua Arthur. She's an end of life doula. And I remember thinking, is this really a thing? It was like I made it up. It was so perfect. And I found the Conscious Dying Institute out of Boulder, Colorado. And I became a Certified End of Life Doula. I founded Dearly Beloved Life and became a Life-Cycle Celebrant. Cindy MacMillan: (12:58) Your words of what you said, he said to you I'm being treated like a potted plant. That's that went right to my, to my heart. Yeah. Lynn Principe Golden: (13:08) Yes. I mean, if you've ever been into nursing homes and assisted living facilities, you understand what I mean? Cindy MacMillan: (13:15) You mentioned being a hospice volunteer. What is the difference between an end of life doula and a hospice volunteer? And I know that you can really just speak to this from your experience, but could you talk about that? Lynn Principe Golden: (13:27) I love that. Yes, absolutely. So, I'm a hospice volunteer. I started about 13 years ago. I'm what you call a transitions volunteer and transitions are volunteers that come in at the very end of life as they're transitioning into, into the dying process. And sometimes they have only days or hours left to live and oftentimes they are alone or their family's not in town. So when I come into the space as a hospice volunteer, I don't know anything about them. I may know just their name, their diagnosis, and their age. I sit with them for two hours at a time. And I try to make those two hours as calming and meaningful as I can. I'll often read to them or play music. And again, I don't know anything about them. Sometimes I can get some clues as to what I see hanging in their rooms. Lynn Principe Golden: (14:20) Maybe if there's a crucifix, I'll pray or I'll play certain music that I think they may like. And I feel like we provide a very needed service as hospice volunteers. And I've learned so much during those visits, but what I feel like I can, what I can offer as an end of life doula, it goes a bit deeper. I want to give you an example of a doula patient I had recently, he was a 44-year-old man. He was dying of a brain tumor. His wife contacted me and she had never heard of what an end of life doula was but what she felt was missing from his hospice care was the emotional and spiritual support that they both needed during his dying process. So the first visit, when I went to see him, I talked to her for a long time about who he was and what mattered to him. Lynn Principe Golden: (15:06) We played music that he loved. I read to him his favorite stories. We saged the room. We lit candles. And I got to know who he was and what mattered to them. And then when I was there, when he passed his two young children were home, they were five and eight years old. And together we did some rituals that I think were very comforting and that's not even a good enough word, but I'll say comforting. We were able to anoint his body together with the children. They surrounded him with flowers and there was an ease that they had. They were able to come in and out of the room and love on him. And I became really close with the family. And in fact, I provided his funeral services the week later. And what I want to speak to about the difference to me, it's one word it's intimacy. Lynn Principe Golden: (15:55) I was able to connect on a deeper level in the way that his wife especially what she really needed and what she felt was missing. And I do want to say he got great care from hospice; they were there and they made sure he had everything he needed. But what he needed, what they all needed from me was something different. And that was the bridge that I feel like a doula can provide. And as of right now, at least here, hospices are not hiring end of life doulas. And I really hope that that will change. And I want to be a part of that change because I can see having doulas on every hospice team, how we can provide a bridge from the physical, to the spiritual and emotional and more of the comfort care that I feel like is missing. Cindy MacMillan: (16:37) Since you do both. I can see as you're talking and you're talking about that intimacy, how that would be a great addition to that hospice team. I read this quote and I want to read it to you. And it's from psychotherapist and author Francis Weller and he wrote; “Bringing grief and death out of the shadow is our spiritual responsibility, our sacred duty.” That almost sounds like what a doula does. Lynn Principe Golden: (17:09) Absolutely. I love his work, especially his work and his writings around grief. They're so inspiring to me and beautiful. And he talks about the different kinds of grief; we are grieving things that we, I don't think we ever named as grief, but he describes it perfectly and he is so profound. Cindy MacMillan: (17:27) Yeah, and I had not read any of his work. And when I was researching for this podcast episode, I found that quote and I felt like it was just perfect for me to read right now. Lynn Principe Golden: (17:39) Right. And what I tell people is that grief is a winding road and there's no one way that grief is supposed to look; it's different for all of us and some days are than others. I don't think that grief ends. I do think that we're forever changed by it because we do love deeply. And that's our birthright. If you love someone and care about them deeply, why would you want to forget them? So I think that it's just a matter of incorporating that into our lives and allowing the wisdom that that person had to continue to inform us even long after they're gone. And Francis Weller has some great talks and you can find him on YouTube. And he has one, I think it's called the Five Gates of Grief (2013). I don't know if I have that right, but it's definitely worth listening to. Cindy MacMillan: (18:22) I will go out and look for that and put it in the show notes. So what is the most rewarding part of your job other than everything? Lynn Principe Golden: (18:30) That's a great question because these are hard conversations to have. And like I said, you know, the dinner party people say, well, what do you do? And I think, hmm, like how much do I really want to say right now? Because you know, I get the blank stare. They, you know, the blinking eyes, but one of the things that most people say is, wow, that must be really depressing and that couldn't be further from the truth. I mean, there are moments of sadness, of course, and I do allow myself to feel those. To be selfish for a moment I feel that having death as my teacher has taught me so much about life. I've recently experienced my own heartbreak and a huge life change. And being with death reminds me of what really matters. It's given me so many gifts. I feel that I've witnessed so much magic being with those walking between the worlds I get to see through their eyes. Lynn Principe Golden: (19:19) And the first time was with Aunt Mary and when the last thing she said to me was Lynn everything's going to work out for you. And that was such a beautiful gift. And I laugh about it now, because I think I should have asked her to be more specific, but I've witnessed the healing of relationships and such deep love and forgiveness. And of course, there is suffering too, as I said, but that's taught me to be humble. And sometimes all I can offer is a hand to hold and a blessing on their journey. So those are the gifts that I receive from being a doula. Cindy MacMillan: (19:53) You talked about rituals a little earlier, and I just want to talk about that a little bit deeper. What is the role of rituals at the end of life? And can you give us an example maybe of one of your favorite rituals? Lynn Principe Golden: (20:07) I love to, I love to talk about this. My favorite ritual that I do and I do this one very often is the anointing ritual. The anointing ritual that I use was developed by my friend and mentor End of Life Doula, Trish Rux. I will do this anointing sometimes before death and sometimes after, depending, and depending on what the patient or the family wants. And I found that when I include the family members in the ritual, that it gives a sense of healing and calm to everyone that's present. I want to give a couple of examples; I had a doula patient last year who had two daughters by two different women and these women, they were grown, but they'd always lived their lives in competition with one another. And there was a lot of resentment and his dying wish was to have them both there by his side. Lynn Principe Golden: (20:58) And you can imagine that there was a lot of tension. And especially when the emotions are so high, the death of their father, who they both adored. When I did the anointing ritual, I gave them each a handful of essential oils and they stood on each side of his bed. And as I read through the ritual, they together anointed their father's body and the room was silent. And there was such a peaceful presence at that time. And when I left that day, after I said, my goodbyes, the two of the sisters were in the kitchen, sobbing in each other's arms. And I felt that the healing that was provided through that ritual was more than I could have ever expected. And I know that he felt that too. I've also used this ritual, as I mentioned with the gentleman who was 44, who died recently, his five and eight-year-old children anointed his body. Lynn Principe Golden: (21:49) And they loved being able to be part of that. It's a way of honoring the body and thanking it for carrying us through and sank goodbye. And if you don't mind, I would love to read you this ritual that my friend Trish wrote. Cindy MacMillan: (22:02) I would love that. Lynn Principe Golden: (22:03) Okay. Perfect. Is this a good time? Cindy MacMillan: (22:05) Yes. Lynn Principe Golden: (22:06) As your body is outwardly anointed with this oil. So may you be filled with love, may you be held in a state of grace, affirmed in all your goodness and may you have eternal peace of mind, body, and spirit. We start with the forehead: We anoint this body, that his journey through this life on earth. May you rest in peace. We anoint these eyes that have seen so much. May you rest in peace. We anoint this mouth that has spoken truth and love. May you rest in peace? We anoint these shoulders that have borne many burdens. May you rest in peace. We anoint this heart that has loved so well. May you rest in peace? We anoint these hands that have worked so hard. May you rest in peace? We anoint these feet that have travelled so far. May you rest in peace? Cindy MacMillan: (22:53) I can see where that would be so healing, just to have those words read with the family, there doing the anointing. Lynn Principe Golden: (23:02) Right, and I think that when we talk about the word healing; healing, doesn't always mean that the person is going to be cured and live. It's a different type of healing and it's available for all who are present at the time of death. Cindy MacMillan: (23:14) Thank you, for kind of clarifying that because yes, the healing and I almost want to use the word as you used earlier the intimacy of that ritual is, is more what I was talking about with that healing. Just feeling just a sense of peace. That was beautiful. Lynn Principe Golden: (23:35) It is profound. Cindy MacMillan: (23:38) End of life doulas can provide several services and you've really gone through a lot of those and Lynn the time has just absolutely flown by. Can you talk a little bit about your services and how people can follow you on your journey? And is there anything that I should have asked you that I didn't? Lynn Principe Golden: (24:02) No, I feel like you gave me the opportunity to talk about what really drives me and what I'm passionate about. And in terms of the services I provide, I talked a little bit about the planning, the bedside vigil and the after death care. I want to go into a little bit of detail if I can, about the planning phase and the services that I learned through Conscious Dying Institute. They were created by our founder, Tarron Estes; we call them the Best Three Months. It's a planning tool that she developed that goes way beyond advanced directives and includes the five domains of life that I mentioned, spiritual, practical, physical, emotional, and mental. And so with each domain, I'll ask questions that about what feels unfinished or not yet put in place or communicated. And together, we create a vision of what we could provide for them, how we could provide the best outcome and create action steps so that their vision becomes a reality. Lynn Principe Golden: (24:57) And a few quick examples: spiritually you could ask if they're interested in having a last confession or they want to go deeper into the study of a spiritual practice, that's always interested them? Practically ask, do they want to die at home? And what would you need to do in order to make that possible? Or perhaps you want your ashes to become part of a coral reef? Who do we need to talk to, to make that happen? In the mental domain asking what their legacy is and what projects feel incomplete? Physically, how much pain are you okay with tolerating in order to stay present with your loved ones? Are there alternative techniques that interest you? Emotionally - and this is a big one for most of us is what's been unsaid? And who do you need to ask forgiveness of? And who do you want to forgive? Lynn Principe Golden: (25:46) And who would you want by your bedside? And who do you want to say goodbye to? I offer the Best Three Months I can come together with groups or I'm offering a free online six week, Best Three Months course. And you don't have to be actively dying in order to create your vision of your Best Three Months. I've created my own and done so with some family members and it really is eye-opening, and it helps us understand what feels unfinished for us, what we can do to have those conversations so that our family knows exactly what our wishes are. And if anyone's interested in getting more information about practicing the Best Three Months with me, or have a group that they want me to address this with them, they can email me at lynngoldenlife@gmail.com or they can check out my website dearlybelovedlife.com for more information. And the most important part of this I want to say is after you make these decisions and really get clear about what your vision is, is share the information. Lynn Principe Golden: (26:44) Because it doesn't do any good if no one knows exactly what you want. Cindy MacMillan: (26:47) Absolutely. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation 60% report that their loved one has a document describing their wishes for medical care. But what surprised me out of that 60%, only 48% knew where it was. So that's kind of like a little bit what you're talking about. Thank you. Thank you, for being here and going over everything. It just is, sounds so rewarding to me and I really appreciate you being here. But the last question I have for you is if you could turn back time and talk to your 18-year-old self, what would you tell her about the season of life that you're in right now? Lynn Principe Golden: (27:30) That's a great question. And I'm not one that lives with alot of regret because I can see in hindsight when each the challenge has taught me, but I think that as an 18-year-old young woman, I would remind myself to not be afraid to use my voice. Lynn Principe Golden: (27:48) And I think that's a big one for me. Cindy MacMillan: (27:50) Perfect. That is a perfect place for us to end. Thank you so much for being here. (27:55) Thank you so much, Cindy. I had a blast. Cindy MacMillan: (27:57) Thank you for listening to this week’s episode of Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast. I really enjoyed talking to Lynn Principe Golden about her journey to becoming an end of life doula and I would love for you to share this episode with your friends and family. Visit our website, CynthiaMacMillan.com, and sign up for our weekly newsletter. Until next time, live inspired!

Mike is an independent Funeral Celebrant and Dying Doula. He runs workshops on 'death and dying' including Dying To Talk sessions, creating safe spaces to talk about death. He offers support to families to help them make informed choices about all aspects of dying and Funerals, especially Home Funerals.   I met Mike at one of his death and dying workshops about 10 years ago and it prompted to me think about death differently. His approach is 180 degrees away from the 24 hour funeral service approach. We talked about the impact of World War 1 on attitudes to death, how his mother died, using Zoom at funerals in lockdown and talking to the bees.   His freethinking recommendations: ‘Die Wise' by Stephen Jenkins and a film about him called 'Griefwalker' at https://www.nfb.ca/film/griefwalker/    Please support more Freethinking episodes on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/lauradodsworth

What can happen when three strangers from three different countries come together and listen to each other deeply? They learn to live well and become wiser.  In this episode, Raquel interviews Susanne Conrad, a learning consultant and online coach in Germany, Martin Farrell, an international facilitator and coach in England and Patricia Koster, a transformation facilitator in the Netherlands. Susanne, Martin, and Patricia met online when they joined Raquel to develop prototypes about how to integrate listening into education and training. One prototype that has been developed through this process is a program called  Live Well, Die Wise. This program emerged as Patricia, Susanne and Martin listened deeply to each other about topics of transitions in life.  They offer a program called Live Well, Die Wise because they want to share the gift of deep listening in an online environment about certain tipping points in an individual's life.  Enjoy their stories about how listening deeply has led to meaningful work together. Enjoy listening in.   Background:  The Live Well, Die Wise program emerged out of a project named “The Virtual Listening Campus”(VLC), where a team of 16 members from 6 different cultures developed prototypes focusing on evidence-based listening in education and training to catalyze a listening movement. The Virtual Listening Campus was part of a four-month program sponsored by the Presencing Institute u.lab 2x, helping teams to develop prototypes that have eco-system impact. The VLC team continues to further their work around listening in a variety of ways. For more information, please contact Raquel Ark. You can read information about Presencing Institutes’ u.lab 2x program here. “Listening is the doorway to understanding, the bridge to connections, and the foundation of trust.”   - Raquel Ark   “Finding the courage to speak had also to do with allowing yourself to be seen and your vulnerability of being different.”    - Patricia Koster   ----- Join the Live More, Die Wise Virtual Listening Group To Know More Visit: https://susanneconrad.jimdofree.com/actual-offer/ ----- Timestamps: 01:35 - How listening changed their lives and how it benefited them and their work. Susanne, Martin, and Patricia share their experiences about what made them passionate about listening. 03:25 - Listening has also unleashed the power of their voice. They talk about when they noticed the relationship between listening and speaking and how it helped them have a voice. 04:48 - They share their realizations about the underrated connection of being listened to and being seen. 11:16 - They talk about the program they developed, as they themselves listened to each other deeply.  12:18 - What is a Virtual Listening Group? 15:06 - How did they create a program through listening to each other?   19: 33 - Patricia shares a last thought on how we can find our own voice by listening and becoming wiser. Key Takeaways:   “The first experiences of this really deep listening gave me a feeling of 'I am seen as a whole human being' and that was very powerful.” - Susanne Conrad “Finding the courage to speak had also to do with allowing yourself to be seen and your vulnerability of being different.” - Patricia Koster “It was very simple, and it was very powerful because you would just listen to the other person. And through that listening, profound changes took place.”  - Martin Farrell “As we know, it's when you let go, that new opportunities can come. But we ferociously hold on to things, even if they are things we don't really want to hold on to.” - Martin Farrell “We don't know how the new world will look like, but I think it's exactly this moment that we can feel strong if we realize we've done this before in life.” - Patricia Koster  Connect with Susanne Conrad https://susanneconrad.jimdofree.com +49 174 9286816 susanne.conrad@gmx.net https://www.linkedin.com/in/susanne-conrad-8767aa93   Connect with Martin Farrell http://www.get2thepoint.org/about.php martin.farrell@get2thepoint.org https://www.linkedin.com/in/martingfarrell   Connect with Patricia Koster  https://livewelldiewise.eu/ Mobile: +31 618 841862 Email: patricia@livewelldiewise.eu https://www.linkedin.com/in/patriciakoster   Connect with Raquel Ark www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn     If you enjoyed today’s podcast, please leave a review on Apple Podcast here and share with the people you think might find this helpful. Thanks, so much for supporting more high-quality, effective listening beyond what we typically consider! Enjoy listening

Matt and Clayton call up Michael of the “Wise Men Say” podcast in Sunderland, England to talk about the other SAFC, Sunderland AFC. We talk about the Netflix series “Sunderland Til I Die” and second division soccer on both sides of the pond. We discuss topics like: - Was the Netflix series a fair or accurate depiction of the club, city, and fans? - How does Michael feel about the American players who have played at Sunderland? - Who would win an SAFC Derby Match? - Compare the two teams, leagues, and fans. - Michael’s surprising love of MLS soccer. - How should soccer in England resume play? Thanks to Michael for his time. Check out the Netflix special and the Wise Men Say podcast which has episode by episode recaps comparing the doc to reality on the ground. Dreaming of meeting up for a pre-game pint in Sunderland once this all passes!

Es ist Zeit für ein bisschen Nerdtalk! Wir reden darüber, was A-cappella-Musik für uns bedeutet, wie es aktuell in der Szene aussieht und erzählen davon, welche Bands uns beeinflusst haben.

I'm very excited to introduce my guest today - prolific author and mythteller Dr. Martin Shaw. I first encountered Martin's writing in the foreword to Stephen Jenkinson's book Die Wise, and was immediately hooked by the elegant and unruly prose that leapt from the page. I found the same ecstatic spirit in Martin's popular essays and numerous books including Scatterlings and the more recent Courting the Wild Twin. Over the years, we've crossed paths at numerous teachings and locales, from a small island off the coast of British Columbia, to a 1000 year old pub near Dartmoor National Park in the UK, where he lives. Martin has spent many years as a wilderness rites-of-passage guide, and honed his craft as a mythteller learning directly with the greats Robert Bly, James Hillman, and Michael Meade... among many others. I knew that one day I needed to speak to Martin about his time in the mythopoetic men's movement, alongside his teaching house Westcountry School of Myth- who are self-described as a “school of courtly love disguised as a monastery for elegant pirates. In our interview today we discuss range of topics: from a bardic role of the mythteller, why we are in the underworld (but don't know it yet), and how this time of coronavirus might be an invitation into our collective initiation. LINKS Martin Shaw - Official Website WestCountry School of Myth Cista Mystica Press

Stephen Jenkinson is an activist, teacher, author, and farmer with a master's degree in theology from Harvard and an MSW from the University of Toronto. A former programme director and assistant professor, Jenkinson co-founded The Orphan Wisdom School and is the author of How It All Could Be, Money and the Soul’s Desires, Die Wise, and Come of Age: The Case of Elderhood in a Time of Trouble. With Gregory Hoskins and band, Stephen has offered Nights of Grief & Mystery to sold out houses on three continents. For more information on Stephen Jenkinson and Terry Patten, check out the resources below: Stephen Jenkinson's Orphan Wisdom School: https://orphanwisdom.com/ Stephen's band's new album, Nights of Grief and Mystery: https://orphanwisdom.com/shop/nights-of-grief-mystery/ Griefwalker Film Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLQWM2j3AVg Terry Patten website: https://www.terrypatten.com/ To learn more about the work we are doing, visit: A New Republic of the Heart website: https://www.newrepublicoftheheart.org/ State of Emergence podcast website: http://stateofemergence.org/

The re-recorded ninth episode. Discussed: Ancestry and adoption, the movies "Good Will Hunting" and "Searching for Bobby Fischer," heroism and human nature as depicted in the movie "Force Majeure," witnessing a traumatic car accident, being attacked by a dog, reports from suicide attempt survivors ("The Bridge," documentary), the Oakland Ghost Ship fire that killed 36 people in 2016, and the surreal experience of your eventual death. Mentioned: Ned Buskirk (You're Going to Die), Stephen Jenkinson (author, "Die Wise"). Music: "Adventure" by Disasterpeace.

Today my guest is Stephen Jenkinson.Stephen is a teacher, author, storyteller, spiritual activist, farmer and founder of the Orphan Wisdom School, a teaching house and learning house for the skills of deep living and making human culture. It is rooted in knowing history, being claimed by ancestry, working for a time ​yet to come.​Stephen worked for many years in the “death trade”, helping people come to terms with their illnesses in a culture that has no real relationship with the death and dying process. He is a trained Harvard theologian and writes urgently and eloquently about how to create culture that relates to the cycles of life and death (Die Wise). His latest book, Come of Age, grapples with the paradox of elderhood in North America: “we are awash in the aged and yet somehow lacking in wisdom; we relegate senior citizens to the corner of the house while simultaneously heralding them as sage elders simply by virtue of their age.”Stephen is currently on the Nights of Grief and Mystery Tour.Find out if he’s in your town. If so, do yourself a favor.

Stephen Jenkinson is a Harvard educated theologian, culture activist, educator, and creator and principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School. For years he headed the counselling team of Canada’s largest home-based palliative care programme and he was assistant professor at a prominent medical school. Working with hundreds of dying people and their families, care-givers, nurses, doctors and social workers he encountered the deep death phobia and grief illiteracy that exists in the West. This motivated him to redefine what it means to live, and die well. He’s the author of several books including: How It All Could Be, Money and the Soul’s Desires, the award winning Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul, and Come of Age: The Case of Elderhood in a Time of Trouble. He’s also the subject of the National Film Board of Canada documentary, Griefwalker, a lyrical, poetic portrait of his work with dying people. Most recently, he has been performing his Nights of Grief & Mystery Tour, a rich and powerfully nuanced evening woven together by deep storytelling, wondering and music, to sold out venues across three continents   00.00 Trailer 00.12 Introduction 02.00 What do people never ask Stephen that he wishes they would? 03.50 Stephen on his communication 08.50 How do you communicate to someone that they are dying? 11.40 What does a good death look like? 16.30 What does the word God mean to Stephen? 19.10 Why does Stephen think age intolerance exists today? 25.20 The degradation of culture 31.20 Stephen on his ancestry 34.40 Stephen on his purpose 40.30 Stephen on his legacy 41.20 What kind of imprint has witnessing so many deaths left on Stephen’s psyche? 44.20 How does Stephen define success? 46.40 Best piece of advice 48.30 Speaking to 20 year old self 49.50 Changing the world 51.40 Being the change you want to see in the world     You can find Stephen at: https://orphanwisdom.com/ https://www.facebook.com/orphanwisdom/ https://www.youtube.com/user/orphanwisdommedia   Find Inspired Edinburgh here: http://www.inspiredinburgh.com https://www.facebook.com/INSPIREDINBURGH https://www.twitter.com/INSPIREDINBURGH https://www.instagram.com/INSPIREDINBURGH

Stephen Jenkinson asks if just being older makes you an elder, than why are there more older people on this planet than ever before in history, but so few wise older people?  Author of Come of Age; the case for Elderhood in a Troubled World and Die Wise; A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul, Stephen drills down into the reasons for Boomers to stop working on self improvement and become stewards of our planet.  This is not a light hearted conversation, but a compelling one that just might change your life. The music on today's episode is Gregory Hoskins  - Nights of Grief and Mystery The 2019 Grief and Mystery Tour Dates click here Lost Nation Road, Film by Ian McKenzie click here Other Films by Ian McKenzie click here and here Info about Orphan Wisdom School and Stephen's website click here Books (click on the links below) Come of Age: A Case for Elderhood in Troubled Times Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul LondonReal Interview June 2019 click here

Stephen Jenkinson is a American Storyteller, Teacher and Author. He holds a masters degree in Theology from Harvard University and a masters in social work from the University of Toronto. During two decades of working in palliative-care, he counselled over 1500 people at their deathbeds. Watch the FULL EPISODE here: https://londonreal.tv/e/stephen-jenkinso…meaning-of-death/

Stephen Jenkinson is a American Storyteller, Teacher and Author. He holds a masters degree in Theology from Harvard University and a masters in social work from the University of Toronto. During two decades of working in palliative-care, he counselled over 1500 people at their deathbeds. Watch the FULL EPISODE here: https://londonreal.tv/e/stephen-jenkinso…meaning-of-death/

Around our house: Farmers Market in full swing. Gardening, yard improvement. Missing loved ones, searching for self. "Doing the work". Engaging fully in activities. Appreciating the connectedness of everyone Finding ourselves through spirituality. Stephen Jenkinson on death and dying. Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson  Interview: Guest Nathan Bettger discusses his work as a hospital chaplain and a spiritual guide.  The work of a hospital chaplain. What is a spiritual guide? Are Generation X, Y, etc spiritually lost? The importance of Elders. Rites of Passage. Deepening our connection with spirituality. natebettger.com Modern Folk logo by Stefan Perkinz greasywhisper.comTheme music by Lee Rosevere Support for Modern Folk comes from my wife Emily Wiggins. Emily is a Naturopathic Doctor in Bend OR.dremilywiggins.com  

Kaye Tribe is a Melbourne based yoga teacher and teacher of teachers. She is a Yoga Australia registered Yoga Therapist and member of the International Association of Yoga Therapists. Kaye is the co-director of the Academy of Yoga and MindBody Education (AYME), and has taught a wide range of students over many years. With her background as a qualified myotherapist and lecturer in a range of Health Science subjects including functional anatomy, she has a deep knowledge of functional anatomy and how it can be useful to yoga teachers and yoga therapists. In this episode, we learn about Kaye's background and how she discovered yoga through the Gita school. We learn about how she started in myotherapy, and how it influences her understanding and teaching of anatomy. We also have some anatomy questions from our audience that Kaye was kind enough to answer, and we finish off with an in-depth discussion on hypermobility and how to most effectively work with hypermobile students. Kaye knows this subject inside and out, so it was an absolute privilege to have this conversation. Links: Academy of Yoga and Mindbody Education https://www.ayme.com.au Video: Awakening the Gluteal Muscles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFq0rldiVFM Video: Are you hyper or hypo mobile? http://www.yogajournal.com.au/2018/03/05/are-you-hyper-or-hypo-mobile/ Rane's Pick of the week - Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson - https://amzn.to/2IR37cI

David Packman is a prominent Melbourne based Meditation guide and Mindset coach. As well as teaching, guiding and speaking around town regularly, he runs regular classes from his own studio The Fifth Direction in Albert Park, Melbourne. David is the current president of Meditation Australia, the national peak body that represents meditation and meditation teachers. I became aware that David was holding a Meditations on Death workshop at A-space studio in Collingwood recently and as you will hear in this episode I have a personal interest in the topic, so I attended. It was a deeply moving experience, and I just knew I had to have David on the Podcast. In this episode, we talk about David's incredible life journey and we end up in a deep discussion on death, how we deny death as individuals and as a culture, and how incredibly unhealthy this is. We talk about how he uses the Wim Hof method to help manage the symptoms of his cancer, and how he incorporates Heartmath and NLP into his work. We also talk about David's role as President of Meditation Australia. Finally, we discuss how we can make the most of every moment of this precious life. Links David Packman's website http://thefifthdirection.com.au/ David on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidpackman/ Some of the books that David refers to: Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson http://amzn.to/2DAfjqP Michael Barbato https://www.deathletterprojects.com/michael-barbato/ Timothy Leary - Design for Dying - http://amzn.to/2HJUxaH Frank Ostaseski - The Five Invitations http://amzn.to/2HHZbWS Pick of the Week: David - Music and the mind - http://thefifthdirection.com.au/ (Under Events) Jo - Hoop Away retreat - http://www.hoopsparx.com/hoopaway Rane - Why Buddhism is True by Robert Wright - http://amzn.to/2GEgadn Theme song is Baby Robots by Ghostsoul and is used with permission - https://ghostsoul.bandcamp.com/

Death, Sex, Money, Power, Age: all sacred – orthodoxed into Taboo, now liberated back to vernacular sacred, through the agency of Stephen Jenkinson – filing scouting reports from the life-death border… Guiding us to “Come of Age,” by honoring age. “Stephen is a teacher, author, storyteller, spiritual activist, farmer and founder of the Orphan Wisdom School, a teaching house and learning house for the skills of deep living and making human culture. It is rooted in knowing history, being claimed by ancestry, working for a time ​yet to come.”​Author of “Die Wise,” “Money and the Soul's Desires,”and the forthcoming “Come of Age, The case for elder hood in a time of Trouble.” www.OrphanWisdom.com and, as KPFA is in Fund Drive, when we release our guest back to Midnight in Athens, we will be playing excerpts of James Hillman on the 1st Visionary Activist Show (one of the pledge incentives we are proffering this week).   Support The Visionary Activist Show on Patreon for weekly Chart & Themes ($4/month), and more… *Woof*Woof*Wanna*Play?!* The post The Visionary Activist Show – Death, Sex, Money, Power, Age appeared first on KPFA.

Stephen is a teacher, author, storyteller, spiritual activist, farmer and founder of the Orphan Wisdom School, a teaching house and learning house for the skills of deep living and making human culture. It is rooted in knowing history, being claimed by ancestry, working for a time ​yet to come.​ https://orphanwisdom.com/

When you face an ending, what is your “repertoire” of response? In most cases, we resist what we don’t want to face to the point of denial or even escape. And often, we don’t dare speak of it. It’s almost as if we have a phobia around death and endings of all kinds. But when […] The post [Podcast Ep. 9] Die Wise with Stephen Jenkinson appeared first on Radiant Astrology.

Rachael Rice is an artist, teacher, musician, truth-teller, and whistle-blower amongst many, many other things. In this intimate conversation, we talk about the death of her mother and how it affected her creativity, her spiritual growth and her journey of recovery. Rachael was 22 when her mother died, and her mom was 49. Learn more about Rachael here. Purchase her original art here, and in her Etsy shop and more cool items on Society6. Listen to our conversation (including Marybeth Bonfiglio!) on Confronting Whiteness here. Find out more about the 12 Step approach here. Learn more about the Cognitive Behavioural Therapy approach here. Rachael mentioned Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, too. Check out Stephen Jenkinson's book Die Wise and Rachael's mom's favourite book on death, Who Dies?: An Investigation of Conscious Living And Conscious Dying by Stephen and Ondrea Levine.

“To grieve is part of the human experience. That's the great dare of being human and being conscious- to be willing to love something that's not going to last; that's a grief-endorsed understanding of life.” Author, teacher, activist, ceremonialist, and founder of Orphan Wisdom School, Stephen Jenkinson muses about life, death, grief, the natural world and the condition of being awake. This profound, provocative, and deeply insightful podcast is an invitation to explore the depths of our existential loneliness and be awake to the inter-connectedness of life so that we can live and die wise and our existence contributes to sustaining life for future generations.

Our guest today is Stephen Jenkinson a Harvard-trained theologian and a teacher, author, storyteller, spiritual activist, farmer and founder of the Orphan Wisdom School, a teaching house and learning house for the skills of deep living and making human culture. Before founding the school, he headed the counsel team of Canada's largest palliative care program and in 2008 a film ‘Griefwalker' was made about his work with the dying and their families and he's the author of several books including ‘Money and the Soul's desires' and ‘Die Wise' .

Listen to a podcast with renowned author, teacher, and ceremonialist, Stephen Jenkinson. "You die in the matter of your living." In poetic and soulful language, Stephen Jenkinson speaks of the moral imperative to contemplate and reconcile death as a way to inform how we live, reclaim our ancestral roots, redeem our past, and leave a legacy for those we love. This podcast was recorded as part of the Hollyhocks Talks Podcast Series in 2016. For more information about Hollyhock Retreat Center, visit www.hollyhock.ca.

As we throw off the mental shackles of the dominant culture and seek sanity and meaning amid the fragments of heritage and conquest, we turn for guidance to a veteran of challenging transitions. Stephen Jenkinson is an activist, teacher, author, and farmer. His book Die Wise recently received the Nautilus Book Award. He has a masters degree in theology from Harvard University and a masters degree in social work from the University of Toronto. Formerly a program director at a major Canadian hospital and medical-school assistant professor, Jenkinson is now a sought-after workshop leader, speaker, and consultant to palliative care and hospice organizations. He is the founder of the Orphan Wisdom School in Canada and the subject of the documentary film Griefwalker.

After two decades working in palliative care, Stephen Jenkinson came to an astonishing conclusion: as a culture and a species, we are utterly unprepared to embrace death and the grief that comes with it. We avoid confronting it at all costs. In his new book, Die Wise, he shares dozens of detailed and intimate stories from his experiences working with the dying and their families, illustrating both the pitfalls of denial and the bounty that can come when we face the end of life openly. Dying well, he believes, is a moral, political, and spiritual obligation each person owes their ancestors and their heirs. Stephen believes that learning to love death is one of the most direct ways to love life.

After two decades working in palliative care, Stephen Jenkinson came to an astonishing conclusion: as a culture and a species, we are utterly unprepared to embrace death and the grief that comes with it. We avoid confronting it at all costs. In his new book, Die Wise, he shares dozens of detailed and intimate stories from his experiences working with the dying and their families, illustrating both the pitfalls of denial and the bounty that can come when we face the end of life openly. Dying well, he believes, is a moral, political, and spiritual obligation each person owes their ancestors and their heirs. Stephen believes that learning to love death is one of the most direct ways to love life.

After two decades working in palliative care, Stephen Jenkinson came to an astonishing conclusion: as a culture and a species, we are utterly unprepared to embrace death and the grief that comes with it. We avoid confronting it at all costs. In his new book, Die Wise, he shares dozens of detailed and intimate stories from his experiences working with the dying and their families, illustrating both the pitfalls of denial and the bounty that can come when we face the end of life openly. Dying well, he believes, is a moral, political, and spiritual obligation each person owes their ancestors and their heirs. Stephen believes that learning to love death is one of the most direct ways to love life.

In this week’s episode Stephen Jenkinson speaks with Joanna about: reconfiguring our culture with dying as a teacher, not an opponent; “more time, more dying” dying in a tech-med, death-phobic culture; self-absorption and dying badly; village mindedness an the gift of a good death; people die in the manner in which they lived; the wisdom […] The post Learning to Die Wise appeared first on Future Primitive Podcasts.

Turning Point- a GPS for your Success with Host Judith L. Harrison Dying well is a right and responsibility of everyone. It is also an inevitability for everyone. Why then do we struggle in our efforts to deny this and make every awkward effort to avoid it? It is said that we should die a little every day. It is said that children deal with it better than adults. Why then do we seem so surprised and uncomfortable with this aspect of a ‘great life’? Why do some see it as a solution to their lives??? We shall explore some of this jungle on our last show of Turning Point – a GPS for Success www.judithlharrison.com