Podcasts about god not

Jesus Nailed The Crucifixion With His Resurrection /// : For Jesus & The Chosen, Easter 2025 (Tribute to Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi) Happy Easter !!! !!! !!! !!! *Original written by: Ben Kohn, Lewis Capaldi, Pete Kelleher, Sam Roman, & Tom Barnes **Awesome Cover by Rain Paris & more Lyrics: Happy Easter!!! Jesus' life surrendered He gave it up Because the way, for us, He keeps paving He churns my writing Gives me the faith to pray in His name eternally He has authority on Earth that's real Seeds of kindness, He's grown The Bible, human life's roadmap Actively freeing our souls Life sprouted into existence through His spoken phrase Holy day after day Floor to ceiling blessing No more sickness Nice finally feeling awake! For us, Jesus intercedes He solves our problems Body, mind, & soul, He shouts out the call To drink from His forgiveness waterfall Eternal, drink now For us, God sacrificed His Son Jesus nailed His crucifixion with His Resurrection Those Sons of Thunder Loved Jesus personally James and John both reflect God's passionate virtue Thanks to Jesus, Mark & Dr. Luke reported eyewitness healings Clearly the Gospels are our Good News Matthew could dependably measure, and report what God would grow Signed it like law was his deal Used skills from his former tax collector days, rad Geneology brought to life through history's wheel John was self described as the disciple loved by Jesus; it's his acclaim His identifying nickname By citing 4 different narrators, we better understand Jesus isn't so easy to explain The fisher of men & women He solves our problems Breaks through strife like paper thin walls Offers us a forgiveness waterfall Eternal, drink now God sacrificed His Son Jesus nailed the crucifixion with His Resurrection Happy Easter~~! Hope you remember it's a sweet holiday Because you are loved by God Not because of sweet Peeps, painted eggs, or chocolate rabbits For us, Jesus intercedes He solves our problems Breaks through strife like paper thin walls Offers a forgiveness waterfall Eternal, drink now God sacrificed His Son Jesus nailed the crucifixion with His Resurrection For us, Jesus intercedes He solves our problems Breaks through strife like paper thin walls Offers a forgiveness waterfall Eternal, drink now God sacrificed His Son Jesus nailed the crucifixion with His Resurrection Eternal water, drink now God sacrificed His Son Jesus was, is, and always will be The Chosen One God's Holy Son End Tribute by Melissa SmithBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/mel-s-music--3634451/support.

Often we hear Grace and Mercy in the same sentence, however there is quite a difference in the meaning of Grace and Mercy! Grace is God applying His righteousness to sinners. His Grace is in Ephesians 2:8-9, "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast." His Mercy is God having compassion for us; overloooking our offenses and not giving to us what we deserve! Lamentations 3:22 "It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not." Let us meditate this week upon this Triune God of Grace, Mercy, and Peace! 2 John 3 "Grace be with you, mercy, and peace, from God the Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and love."

The Christmas rush may be over, but the reason we celebrate is ALWAYS in season. We share our favorite Christmas memories and traditions in this episode, and clarify what biblical baptism truly is. #Baptism #Christmas #KJV #KingJamesBible #WEWANTTOSEEYOUINHEAVEN God's Perfect Gift of Eternal Salvation 1. RECOGNIZE YOUR CONDITION.In order to find the way to eternal life with God, I must admit I am lost in sin. Romans 5:12 teaches us that since Adam and Eve, the first man and woman on earth, a sin nature has been present in all people. Romans 3:23 says, “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” Sin is any act contrary to God's laws and commandments, and those sins that I have committed separate me from God. Whenever I have been lost, I have paid some type of penalty. I have been late to a special event and, on occasion, I have received a speeding ticket. Sin also has a penalty. Romans 6:23 says, “For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” The “wage” or payment for our sin is spiritual death, and eternal separation from God. 2. RELIGION AND GOOD WORKS ARE NOT THE ANSWER. Religions try to create their own ways to God. Their systems may seem logical, but they cannot bridge the gap created by our sin. Proverbs 14:12 says, “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.” In other words, our thoughts and ways are not what matter. God's Word, the Bible, provides true answers of grace and forgiveness. In Ephesians 2:8–9 the Bible says, “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” 3. THE GOOD NEWS: JESUS CHRIST PROVIDED THE WAY. Even though we were lost and separated from God, He loved us, and because He is love, God sent His Son to die on the Cross and raise from the dead three days later. John 3:16 explains “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” Through the death and resurrection of Jesus, He became the payment for our sin. He took our place as our Substitute! Now, we do not have to pay for our sin ourselves. By His grace, salvation is provided. In Romans 5:8, the Bible says, “But God commendeth [meaning proved or demonstrated] his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” 4. REPENT AND BELIEVE TO RECEIVE THE FREE GIFT OF SALVATION THROUGH JESUS CHRIST. In order to have a relationship with God and an eternal home in Heaven, we must turn from our sin and our own efforts to save ourselves and instead place our full trust in Jesus Christ alone for the forgiveness of our sin and eternal life. Repentance is not about turning over a new leaf or reforming your lifestyle; it's about having a heart change about sin, seeing it as God sees it and wanting deliverance from it. Belief means more than just agreeing with some facts about Jesus. Rather, it is completely relying upon Jesus and Him alone to forgive your sins, satisfy the Father's wrath, and declare your righteous before a holy God. In Romans 10:13 the Bible says, “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” That is a promise directly from God that if you will pray to Him, confess that you are a sinner, ask Him to forgive your sins, and turn to Him alone to be your Savior, then He promises to save you and give you the free gift of eternal life. You can make that decision today by calling out to God in faith.

What does it mean to sing “Holy holy holy is God” NOT to God, but to one another? Might Isaiah's magnificent and poetic imagery of the seraphim singing their praise of God's holiness TO one another be received as an invitation to do the same?Sermon begins at minute marker 4:11 Scripture: ​​​​Isaiah 6.1-8 ResourcesBibleWorm podcast: Episode 612 – Here I Am Send Me!, Amy Robertson and Robert Williamson, Jr.“Before I Was a Gazan,” Naomi Shihab Nye, from Everything Comes Next: Collected & New Poems (2020), 100.“A Few Rules For Predicting the Future,” Octavia E. Butler (2000), 7-15.“Schrödinger's Seraphim,” Vija Merrill.Releasing friend of SMC met through the One Parish One Prisoner program of Underground Ministries.Image: Seraphim in Hagia Sofia, in Istanbul Türkiye, photo by Pastor Megan Ramer.Hymn: Voices Together 156 - There's a Wideness in God's Mercy. Text: Frederick W. Faber (England), Hymns, 1861. Music: Lizzie S. Tourjee (USA), Hymnal of the Methodist Church with Tunes, 1878. Permission to podcast the music in this service obtained from ONE LICENSE, license #A-726929. All rights reserved.

This episode talks about the definitive proof of the God NOT in three persons.

Enjoy this “throwback” episode from the Woman at the Well Ministries radio program, as Kim Miller brings us a message out of Ephesians 2:8-9, which says, “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” Do you want to connect with Kim and Erika? Visit us on our website, on Facebook, or on Instagram.  Mentioned in this Episode Ephesians 2:8-9 www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians+2%3A8-9&version=KJV  Did you enjoy this podcast? Post a review and share it! If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review. You can listen to us on all major podcasting platforms like Apple Podcasts,  Spotify,  Google Podcasts,  YouTube, and Podbean. Check out Kim's latest Bible Bit book on Amazon! Do you want to bring Kim Miller to your church, upcoming retreat, or conference? Contact us! This podcast is brought to you by Woman at the Well Ministries and is supported by our faithful listeners. To support this podcast, please visit our support page.  

Jesus died for you (verse 1) -brokenness -God's design -Sin -Jesus -Turn and trust -Recover God's designLive for God: Wholeheartedly (verse 1)Live for God: Not for the world (verse 2)Live for God: His way (verse 2)

Endure to Manifest Salvation (3)  Sonship Manifests Jesus (audio) David Eells (6/12/24)  We've been studying salvation and we've learned that the salvation of our spirit happens instantly when we repent and receive Jesus. We've also learned that the salvation of our soul happens to a greater and greater extent as we walk according to the Word and it's the gift of faith from God that enables us to do that. It's important for each of us to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12) because we're each given only a certain amount of time to bear fruit and time is running out.   Now let's look a little deeper at what it means to manifest salvation in your soul, which is your mind, will and emotions. (Pro.29:21) He that delicately bringeth up his servant from a child Shall have him become a son at the last. The Hebrews, Greeks and Romans, during Biblical times, all had the custom of adult adoption. (Gen.15:2) And Abram said, O Lord God, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and he that shall be possessor of my house is Eliezer of Damascus? If they had no other heirs, then they would adopt a beloved servant of theirs. Or, even when they did have an heir, if they really loved a servant of theirs, they would adopt that servant and make him a son. It was a fairly common custom among many of the other cultures throughout the ancient world, too.   Oftentimes, the Bible teaches lessons that run in parallel with the traditions of men and Jesus always gave parables about the natural things, so that people could understand the supernatural things. In this case, the Scripture is talking about the adoption of sons and our text says that a person can “delicately bring up his servant from a child.” That means “child” and“ servant” are synonymous because the next step in our text is this “Shall have him become a son at the last.”  A son is neither a child nor a servant. So our goal is to become a son in the image of God's Son.   When I noticed this in the Scriptures, I began to delve into the customs surrounding the adoption of servants and I discovered that there were three main parts to this tradition. First, the master would give the revelation of sonship to the servant. He would tell his servant that he was a son and Scripture does that with us. Scripture tells us that we are sons by faith. The adoption has not happened yet, but we have been told that we are sons and we are to accept that by faith. The only part that has actually been manifested, when you are told you are a son, is in your spirit. You have sonship in your spirit.   The second part of the tradition was that the master would make it public that this servant was a son. The Bible talks about it this way: (Rom.8:19) For the earnest expectation of the creation waiteth for the revealing of the sons of God. Our adoption is made public when people see Christ in us. It's made public when it's manifested in your soul. We go from spirit to soul because Christ has come in our spirit, but He wants to come in our soul. He wants to manifest Himself in our thinking and He wants to manifest Himself in our actions. That's where it's manifested in faith, until you receive a new body.   The third part of the tradition was the formal adoption of the servant. (Rom.8:23) And not only so, but ourselves also, who have the first-fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for [our] adoption, [to wit], the redemption of our body. The adoption is manifested in the body and it's when you have become the manifestation of what God has always called you to be from the beginning. It's when you are manifested sons, (Col.1:27) ... which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. Here on this earth, our responsibility is to walk by faith in Jesus Christ in order to see His sonship manifested in spirit and in soul, before body.   We have nothing to do with the body. The redeemed body is going to come later and it will come to those who are faithful in bearing fruit in the area of the soul. The manifestation of sonship in spirit is instantly accomplished when your spirit manifests the Spirit of Christ. The progressive manifestation of sonship in soul comes to pass as you walk in your natural body more and more as Christ walked. It's not out of our own ability that we can do this, but it's through God's ability. He promises that He will work in us. (Php.1:6) Being confident of this very thing, that he who began a good work in you will perfect it (That is, “bring it to completion.”) until the day of Jesus Christ.   Paul said in (Php.3:14) I press on toward the goal unto the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. You have to see a goal. If you think that you have already passed that goal, then it's not going to make you strive for “the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” So you have to see a goal and the goal is the manifestation of Christ in you. This is the purpose of why we are here. And when you take a closer look at this manifestation of sonship in our soul, you find the Bible speaks of progressive salvation.   (Rom.8:12) So then, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh: (13) for if ye live after the flesh, ye must die; but if by the Spirit ye put to death the deeds of the body, ye shall live. (14) For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. These two verses are synonymous because putting to death the deeds of the body or, in other words, denying yourself, denying the “old man,” is bearing your cross. When you're bearing your cross, you're being led by the Spirit and to be led by the Spirit is to manifest sonship.   It's very important that we study the Word of God because the Word of God is the seed that brings forth Christ and the Word of God also renews our mind so that we can walk with the Spirit. (Rom.12:2) And be not fashioned according to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God. The natural, carnal mind cannot walk with the Spirit. (Amo.3:3) Shall two walk together, except they have agreed? The Spirit is foolishness to the carnal mind. (1Co.1:18) For the word of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us who are saved it is the power of God. So when we come into agreement with God, then we can walk in the Spirit.   Our capacity to walk hand-in-hand with Jesus as He walked, our capacity to walk in the Spirit, is directly related to how much of the Word we are agreeing with. That's because, if you're not agreeing with God, you're certainly not going to listen to Him and you are not going to obey Him. And when these principles of the Word are involved in a situation or circumstance that you're in, you're not going to be obedient to them, if you're disagreeing with them. How do we come to recognize, and come to know the voice of the Spirit? We become familiar with this Word; that's why we've been given the Word. Many people think that the Word of the New Testament is a New Testament Law, like the Old Testament was an Old Testament Law. No, we were given the New Testament in order to “renew” our mind so that we can walk in the Spirit.   Living according to the New Testament is to walk in the Spirit; it's to walk with Christ and abide in Him. The New Testament gives us familiarity with the Spirit, so that we can walk with Him. How do you know what voice speaks to you, unless you are familiar with the person of that voice through their own words, through their own nature, through their own character? When you study the Word, you begin to know the voice of the Spirit and you can see where people go astray of Him. You can see, too, why they go astray because you can see error more clearly, the more familiar you become with the Word. We need to have fellowship with God through the Word, so that we can be “led by the Spirit” to God and be called “sons of God.”   And Paul goes on to say, (Rom.8:15) For ye received not the spirit of bondage again unto fear.... Those people under the Old Covenant did not have the Holy Spirit and they were in bondage to the Law. (Joh.7:39) But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believed on him were to receive: for the Spirit was not yet [given]; because Jesus was not yet glorified. When they kept the Law, they had to do it by their own strength and by their own ability, but that wasn't possible. (Jas.2:10) For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet stumble in one [point], he is become guilty of all. And if we're trying to keep the Law of the Old Testament, then we have made ourselves bondservants. (Joh.8:35) And the bondservant abideth not in the house for ever: the son abideth forever.  The Holy Spirit's job is to bring us to adoption. (Rom.8:15) For ye received not the spirit of bondage again unto fear; but ye received the spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. The Holy Spirit is called “the spirit of adoption” because His job is to manifest the sonship of Christ in us. Jesus said, (Joh.16:14) He shall glorify me: for he shall take of mine, and shall declare [it] unto you. Our faith is what makes it possible for the Holy Spirit to manifest Jesus in us. You must be calling (Rom.4:17) the things that are not, as though they were. You must accept sonship now, if it's ever to be manifested. The Holy Spirit moves through our faith and He brings things to pass because of our faith, but He doesn't have to do anything, if you don't have faith. There are no promises for you in this Word, if you don't have faith.   (1Jn.5:4) For whatsoever is begotten of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that hath overcome the world, even our faith. Faith is the victory that overcomes the world. The Holy Spirit is to bring us to the adoption of sonship and the adoption is the end of our faith, not the beginning of our faith. (1Pe.1:9) Receiving the end of your faith, [even] the salvation of [your] souls. God manifests the adoption because of the salvation of the soul, which is when the soul bears fruit 30-, 60- or 100-fold. We are sons of God by faith. We are adopted by faith. Gal 3:26 For ye are all sons of God, through faith in Christ Jesus. And it's a wonderful thing that God reckons our faith as righteousness (Romans 4:3,5,9,11,22,24; Galatians 3:6; James 2:23) because that means a baby Christian can enter into the Kingdom. Otherwise, no one who has not yet manifested sonship would have hope or a chance. (Jas.2:17) Even so faith, if it have not works, is dead in itself. Faith must be walked in. (18) And I by my works will show thee [my] faith. Folks, there are plenty of people who say they have faith, but it's not real faith because they are not walking in it. They're only acknowledging in their mind that they have faith. You cannot stand still in faith. Real faith moves; real faith has action. Without action, faith is “dead,” or incomplete.   (Rom.8:16) The Spirit himself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are children of God. Notice, it doesn't say “sons.” That's because Paul is talking here about manifestation. (2Ti.2:15) Give diligence to present thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, handling aright the word of truth. We have to be careful in “rightly dividing the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15 KJV) and since he's talking about manifestation, then we can say that all those who are walking by faith are at least children of God by manifestation. (1Jn.3:2) Beloved, now are we children of God (Not “sons of God,” as the KJV says.), and it is not yet made manifest what we shall be. We need to understand that “what we shall be” is Christ! (1Co.13:12) For now we see in a mirror, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know fully even as also I was fully known.   We are going to see Him face-to-face! God's purpose in Christ is to bring about His life in us, so that manifestly we are sons of God. (1Jn.3:2) Beloved, now are we children of God, and it is not yet made manifest what we shall be. We know that, if he shall be manifested (shines forth from us), we shall be like him; for we shall see him even as he is (In the mirror). (Rom.8:16) The Spirit himself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are children of God: (17) and if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if (Notice this “if”. We are children, heirs of God and joint-heirs with Christ only if we also suffer with Him.) “if” so be that we suffer with [him,] that we may be also glorified with [him].   Suffering is what happens when you are led by the Spirit because your flesh always wants to go the opposite way. (1Pe.4:1) Forasmuch then as Christ suffered in the flesh, arm ye yourselves also with the same mind; for he that hath suffered in the flesh hath ceased from sin. Why is that? It's because when you suffer in the flesh, it means that you are going against the flesh and you are walking in the Spirit. You have to suffer with Christ, in order to be glorified with Christ. In order for the Spirit to grow in you, you have to suffer the death of self, the death of the old man. Walking in the Spirit is suffering the death of self. (Rom.8:18) For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed to us-ward. (19) For the earnest expectation of the creation waiteth for the revealing of the sons of God. The Greek word for “revealing” there comes from apokalupto and it actually means “unveiling.”   Creation is waiting for the unveiling, or manifestation, of the sons of God. The sons of God are hidden to the world and the reason they are hidden to the world is that they are not yet acting in agreement with the Son, Jesus Christ. We know that the full adoption does not happen until we receive our new body and it says that a little further down in the Scriptures, but we also know that the manifestation of Sonship in Christ was true in spirit and soul before He received a new body. Jesus did His works in this earth as a manifested Son in spirit and in soul before He received His new body. Creation is waiting for the manifestation of sons of God in spirit and in soul, even while they are walking in their body of flesh.   Paul said, (2Co.10:3) For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. And that is the truth. One Jesus or one Paul or one Peter can do much more than 10,000 carnal Christians. The creation needs the manifestation of sons so that the creation itself will be delivered. (Rom.8:20) For the creation was subjected to vanity, not of its own will, but by reason of him who subjected it, in hope (21) that the creation itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the liberty of the glory of the children of God. We have the authority in Christ to bring deliverance to creation. I've prayed for my animals and I've seen God heal them. I've prayed over my grass and I've seen God heal it where there was blight. Those are just a couple of examples, but if we can already see it in little ways, just think how it would be if God's children come to understand that the inheritance has been given to us!   We've been given authority over all the power of the enemy. And what's the “power” of the enemy? The power of the enemy is the curse, but we have been given authority over the curse! (Act.10:38) Even Jesus of Nazareth, how God anointed him with the Holy Spirit and with power: who went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil; for God was with him. Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil, the works of corruption. And since the creation is under the bondage of corruption because of the fall of man, now God is reversing the process. This time God is going to save man and use man to bring about the deliverance of the creation, so the creation is waiting for man to be saved manifestly. All of creation is waiting for man to come into what God has provided.   The creation never would have been delivered unto corruption had it not been for man and now God is reversing the process through the Spiritual man, Jesus Christ. (Rom.8:22) For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now. (23) And not only so, but ourselves also, who have the first-fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for [our] adoption, [to wit], the redemption of our body. I believe this redemption of the body that Paul's talking about here is a new body because Christ is to be manifested in us first spirit, then soul and then body. The fullness of adoption happens when you get the new body. He's talking about the new creation of Christ.   We don't have anything to do with the new body at this moment, but we can deliver our body of flesh from the bondage of corruption. This body that we walk in is part of the natural creation, so we have authority to deliver this body from corruption while we walk in Jesus Christ. Of course, we have no authority to deliver this body while we walk in willful sin (Hebrews 10:26-27). (Rom.8:24) For in hope were we saved: but hope that is seen is not hope: for who hopeth for that which he seeth? (25) But if we hope for that which we see not, [then] do we with patience wait for it. We are patiently waiting for the full manifestation, which we received by faith and which we received in hope.   Do you know what “hope” is? “Hope” is a “firm expectation.” We are expecting to see it, but a lot of the Church doesn't expect to ever see this. They are quite content to just accept what little they have right now, but that's not God's plan and it's not His purpose. His purpose is to manifest sons and the manifestation of sonship is going to deliver all of creation from this bondage of corruption that creation is groaning under. We are sons through faith now. At this point, we have manifested sonship in our spirit and we are manifesting sonship in our soul. And we will have manifested sonship in our body at the adoption. So what we're saying about sonship is exactly the same thing we're saying about salvation. Sonship in your spirit is instantaneous, but then sonship in your soul is progressive. Manifestly, we are children or servants, but we want to grow to be sons.   There are important differences between servants and sons, and between children and sons. A child doesn't have the same capacity to serve as does a full-grown son, but a servant may serve for reasons other than a son serves. If you are a hired servant, you serve for gain. If you are a bondservant, you serve because you must. A true son doesn't serve for either one of those reasons. A true son serves for love. So a son serves his father for one reason, to promote their Father's Kingdom, while servants serve for other reasons.   You see, God wants a different relationship with us. The relationship we had when we started with Him is not the one He plans for us. We came to Him as carnal children and we're somewhere between there and where we are supposed to be. But God takes us from where we are and He wants to bring us to where He is! People need to realize that we're here to manifest sonship! We're here for a purpose! We're here to run a race! We're here to bear the fruit of Jesus Christ, 30-, 60- and 100-fold. People who miss that point will never bear fruit and will remain servants.   If you remember, the Galatian Church was rebuked by Paul because they allowed the Jews to drag them back under the Law, back from being sons to being servants. Even though the Galatians started out by faith in Jesus Christ, they went back under the Law. He said to them, (Gal.3:3) Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now perfected in the flesh? (4) Did ye suffer so many things in vain? if it be indeed in vain. (5) He therefore that supplieth to you the Spirit, and worketh miracles among you, [doeth he it] by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith? In other words, what God does for us, He does it because of our faith and not because of the works of the Law. Everything that God does from here until the end, He is doing because of our faith.   Faith is when you (Rom.4:17) calleth the things that are not, as though they were. In other words, you are believing (present tense) that you have received (past tense) something, simply on the grounds that God says you have it and not on the grounds that you see it or that you hear it or that you feel it. You are believing strictly on the grounds that the Bible says He has given it to you and, therefore, it's yours. Jesus said, (Mar.11:24 NENT) All things whatsoever ye pray and ask for, believe that ye received them, and ye shall have them. The answer will be manifested, but first you must believe you have received. You must accept it by faith and then it will be manifested. That's the Gospel.   The Gospel is free and from the most ignorant baby Christian on up, you can receive God's blessings because you receive through your faith and not according to your ability. Paul tells us, (Gal.3:26) For ye are all sons of God, through faith, in Christ Jesus. He's trying to convince the Galatians of this because the Galatians came out from under sonship, as you are going to see in just a minute. They went from being sons of God to being servants of God when they put themselves back under the Law. (Gal.5:4) Ye are severed from Christ.... If you are severed from Christ, then you are severed from sonship because He is sonship! His life in you is sonship. (4) Ye are severed from Christ, ye who would be justified (or “made righteous”) by the law; ye are fallen away from grace. (5) For we through the Spirit by faith wait for the hope of righteousness. Righteousness is Jesus Christ! How sad it is that so many Christians don't understand what righteousness is! How sad that they are so willing to settle just for being forgiven. If a person stays in that position and does not walk in the Spirit he will be an unprofitable servant! We are running a race against the time that God has given us here and we have to bear fruit within that time. If you stay an unprofitable servant for very long, you will not manifest the fruit of the Spirit, which is the reason you are here.   Jesus said that the ones who will make it will bear fruit 30-, 60- and 100- fold. (Mat.13:18) Hear then ye the parable of the sower. Now Jesus explains what this parable means: (19) When any one heareth the word of the kingdom, and understandeth it not, then cometh the evil one, and snatcheth away that which hath been sown in his heart. This is he that was sown by the way side. (20) And he that was sown upon the rocky places, this is he that heareth the word, and straightway with joy receiveth it; (21) yet hath he not root in himself, but endureth for a while; and when tribulation or persecution ariseth because of the word, straightway he stumbleth. (22) And he that was sown among the thorns, this is he that heareth the word; and the care of the world, and the deceitfulness of riches, choke the word, and he becometh unfruitful. (23) And he that was sown upon the good ground, this is he that heareth the word, and understandeth it; who verily beareth fruit, and bringeth forth, some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty.   So the other three out of the four people He mentioned there didn't make it! This should exhort us to go forward and to use the time that we have. (Col.4:5) Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. The Bible says to redeem the time and we must do that! We have to do that! There's nothing else more important in this world and nothing else is important in this world. We have been put here, sown as a seed in this earth, which is this body, in order to bear the fruit of Christ 30-, 60- and 100-fold. And if we give good ground to that seed sown, we will manifest Christ.   Let's back up to what Paul told the Galatians: (Gal.3:26) For ye are all sons of God, through faith, in Christ Jesus. (27) For as many of you as were baptized into Christ did put on Christ. Now, how does this line up with what he said in Romans? (Rom.13:12) The night is far spent, and the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light. (13) Let us walk becomingly, as in the day; not in revelling and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and jealousy. (14) But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to [fulfil] the lusts [thereof]. So we see that putting on Christ is putting on righteousness and Paul tells you to do that.   However, here he also says that if you have been baptized into Christ, you did put on Christ. In other words, by faith when you were baptized your old man died and now Christ lives in you. You put Him on by faith, but (Jas.2:17) Even so faith, if it have not works, is dead in itself. A person who walks on past their baptism should be walking in death-to-self through (Eph.5:26) ... the washing of water with the word because that's what baptism is. It's the water of baptism that puts to death the old man and gives life to the new man. The water of baptism represents the same water as the Word. After baptism, the Word manifests baptism. The Word puts to death the old man and it gives life to the new man; the Word causes you to put on Christ. Baptism is an act of faith that says, “I have received it all! It is mine! The old man is dead and the new man lives, and that new man is Jesus! I am now a son of God!” That's what you profess at baptism; that's what you believe at baptism. You put on Christ when you are baptized.   Going on in (Gal.4:1) But I say that so long as the heir is a child, he differeth nothing from a bondservant.... There it is! A “child” is a “servant.” We saw that Proverbs says the same thing. (Pro.29:21) He that delicately bringeth up his servant from a child Shall have him become a son at the last. (Gal.4:1) But I say that so long as the heir is a child, he differeth nothing from a bondservant though he is lord of all. So as long as the heir is still a child, he lives like a bondservant, even though he is lord of all! And we know that the Galatians had fallen back to being children because Paul goes on to say, (Gal.4:19) My little children, of whom I am again in travail until Christ be formed in you. See, the problem was that they were “severed from Christ” because of their seeking to be justified by the Law.   The Bible says that if you go back under the Law, you are cut off from Christ. Christ being formed in you is a matter of accepting it by faith from the very beginning at the time of your baptism and then continuing to walk in that faith. The Bible says we stand in Christ by faith; otherwise, we, too, will be broken off. By their unbelief, the Galatians were broken off after they were children of God. (Rom.11:19) Thou wilt say then, Branches were broken off, that I might be grafted in. (20) Well; by their unbelief they were broken off, and thou standest by thy faith. Be not highminded, but fear: (21) for if God spared not the natural branches, neither will he spare thee.   (22) Behold then the goodness and severity of God: toward them that fell, severity; but toward thee, God's goodness, if thou continue in his goodness: otherwise thou also shalt be cut off. (23) And they also, if they continue not in their unbelief, shall be grafted in: for God is able to graft them in again. The Galatians had gotten out from under faith. There is no justification in the New Testament for the Law. If you are seeking to be justified or accepted by God through the Law, you are cut off from Christ and there is no hope without repentance. Paul was telling those Galatians, “Don't listen to these Jews! If you think that you're going to be justified by keeping days and seasons and months and all the Law, then you're cut off from Christ! You're children again; you're servants again.”     It's not just the Law of the Old Testament that cuts people off from Christ; it can be the “laws” that your church makes up or it can be the “laws” that you might make up of yourself. Anything that causes you to follow another spirit, instead of the Spirit of Christ, separates you from Christ. We were put here to follow the Spirit of Christ. Rules and regulations that are not Scriptural rules and regulations cause you to go down a legalistic road and that prevents you from being able to hear the voice of the Spirit. A good example to look at from Old Testament Law is tithing. If you listen to the voice of the Spirit, He is certainly going to make a “giver” out of you, but He's going to have you give to things that you might not ordinarily give to and the percentage most often will be greater because you are following the Spirit.     God will always return what you sow. (Luk.6:38) Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, shall they give into your bosom. For with what measure ye mete it shall be measured to you again. And God promises us, (2Co.9:6) He that soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; he that soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully. So, in this example, the Law separates you from Christ because the Law says one thing about your money, but the Spirit of God tells you something else in the New Testament. The Old Testament Law tells you to bring your tithe into the storehouse, which was in the middle of the Temple. The Spirit tells you that now the storehouse is the people of God because the people of God are His Temple.  

{Happy Days} / [A Tie That Binds] [As Seen On TV] / I _ NY (I Love New York) New Albums Coming Soon Love , -Ū. I SAID I LOVE YOU! I AMBER HEARD YOU —YEAH, WELL, YOU COURTNEY LOVED HIM! No guilt trips. Brooklyn, I don't give a shit about you blond bitches Ya'll is crooked as fuck Fast walking trying to pass me That's alright; I can write A whole album in 45 minutes So pay attention I should be booking shows I'm stuck at the stove With no furniture No money to blow Blowing bubbles in the tub Wondering how the fuck I'm supposed to run With no protein I'm so hungry Carbohydrates can't harm nobody Less you're a wanna be All my demons skinny as can be And still eating Still scrolling on social media like “Fuck it “ I don't owe nobody nothing I don't want nobody, actually All of these guys find me ugly Just wait till it's me on the Tv I'll have them all Take me to the future again I been in this bed for six days Just going blank slate [Slate Your Name, Please] A monocle, A synagogue, a musical, and a monologue Let's log it all on the podcast and make it a montage, Shall we, or shall we not? SAGAL: CUT. I'm not that dead, man I been praying for him and his family Can't get her name out of my head, that one These are oceans, planets and oceans I can write a whole album In 45 minutes Might need a jacket I die when the wind blows If it gets colder I fit the mold, huh? I'm not worried about a snowman Till it gets frozen Bring the hoes in Dirty dozen donuts Something says “you were chosen” Another stroller I don't even want to go there My life is over I got your number I never ever want to grow here on my Nowhere I'm sober I'm so bare I'm so Bearr [censored] I never wanted the impossible thought form I never wanted to forgot where I come from I never won an award for nothing I don't want no man I don't want no friends I don't want it no more It's a war here I'm no racist, promise I'm just informing ya Compromises and honor rolls Sometimes you take two doses Sometimes you're a bulldozier And hozier don't know shit Satan can't do shit but sit there Cause Ain't nobody in that body Just the lack of where I am is I am is I don't really need nobody Cause soon as I got him He gon want some body That's not me That's the problem Another oracle Another blonde with no Nothing between the thighs, I shot him right between the eyes I been crying and trying days and nights To be right there Be right there He really like a nightmare Yeah. He really like a nightmare Yeah. He really like a nightmare A whole frightening ass— Lights up, Curtains open quiet on stage Hold backstage Quick change I just want to walk into buffalo exchange like Here, take this; I'll take 5 orders or your best chicken, And just wait for this literal genius to be like “Uh—we don't have chicken here” Sorry, I just assumed with buffalo Walked in with nothing, No clothes Just a really old guy holding my hand like “I'll buy this” Thanks, gramps That's my man Thanks lion, That's my Maine. Now, what's my name? Manhattan. Why all the white supremacists mad? They're just like that I spin backwards trying to die Cause I can't catch a white man That's big ass fish I just got my dick stroked, you know This one and that one, he says Swerve, I'm all in my mainstream All in my I can't take it I just had a big ass stroke, you know I been smelling cornbread— Nope, That's the oven I love it Here's my language: Jesus, save us There she is— Another television envious of sentientness You know This is the sweetness of success Without the sweat in it I put a letter out in public to Letterman and Conan Before of course I realized, I just might be writing to dead men And that's what death is Debt That's what death is When Johnny Depp is your best friend And everything and everyone else is indifferent And the dishes have just been Like that In the sink, Like the rest of the trinkets Now let that sink in Or synchronize in synchronized Fuck it (I'll keep drinking/ Thinking) I'll never be a Never be a Whatever this bitch is I never loved him Never loved him Never loved another's husband Never remembered anyway, what the password was When the last world ended My eyes got brown as my skin is I miss him Dinner and wine, then I kissed him In a different dimension Now it's just Not worth mentioning It's so funny. I don't want Nothing no more Not a dog Not a baby That's a death wish I don't want a friend in the world Besides my best friend I only talk to my mother over Divorce papers and turntables I been battling Satan I'm just the saddest thing that ever happened (Finally, a hook in this bitch) I'm just the saddest thing that ever happened Next to Johnny Carson, that is, you know Leno, Subliminal messages And infinite women I'm just the saddest thing that ever happened Since Patrick the predecessor This is just a precursor to Esha The successor The success story starts When starr's shaman curse is over Where will I ever find a four leaf clover Or a lover in Manhattan or new York at all, mom?!? I must be a dead man walking I'm the saddest thing that ever happened I got my name on the dollar bill Now the face of the phases is coming The worst thing that ever happened A dead man walking Green means go The whole world is color coded My heart is swollen And I just want to go home My throne is Not my apartment With the darkness sets in Regrets starts sending me electromagnetic messages I could honest to God Not give a fuck If a bus or a truck Just hit me It's been a year and some months in this city And I have a whole studio But my humor loud is still shitty I love this city But miss decency These immigrants just don't know how to act Too many levels and synchronicities to this thing Too many levels of infinite television figures Way too many people giving me attention Way too many Dollar signs on mattresses, Too many mad maxes and mad hatters Too many beautiful black man ‘s with manners I just wonder why I can't find them attractive Satan holds the door open The world war's starting I don't want no problems, I just blow bubbles, dory, like It was horrible, Touching the face of the sun And then Vanishing like that It's impossible, Now I've got piglets and players And nice hats With sliced cabbage If I back track To mice and men My sandwhich is just as Tight as ever, Last I checked Lesson learned, I said Don't touch that But I pressed the easy button Twice since lunch Fuck I might have fucked up somewhere Getting drunk with the undercover Who doesn't know nothing according To the blowjobs i showed him No man And no friends No dog And no kids No sodom and gamora With long hair I'm the whore of babylon, underling Do you know this? Do you notice me? Coming over with no hair In the clear As if I would still feel the same Like next year I can't hear it It's encouragement Take a long dive Off a short pier! It's the wrong hearing I got no charges out on the open I just won't be starting fires under Bridges As long as there's water running Which I should be, But life's not funny And something haunting me, I got problems with God Probably a prophet, apostle or something With black skin and a hanging stomach I never ever had love again? That does it I'm over this whole world, Fuck it I want another husband Who doesn't have occulars at all, then Dead man walkin I'm dead man walking I'm so sick of talking And motorcycles and hotrods stalking my apartment But nothing I do or say quite matters Like the latest cake album Cause fame does fuck up the Love game And the other ones That's the whole world, now Nothing but monopoly to dumb Gods I'm just sucking my thumb, nodding like Fuck my heart is open I want to throw up, and this whole ass Borough smells like vomit And dog piss! I just want to be be as tall or as small as hot is, But this plot shit Is getting thinner Like I should be but it's getting closer to dinner And this ugly ex husband Keeps costing me money It's fucked up But I don't want nothing but Some fucking vanilla Hagen das! I want a dog, But money is a fuckin problem, All I know is The more I want something The farher away it is all from coming I need alcohol in my stomach And my hearts erupting with love, or something I should probably pick up a Book of Mormon before Sunday Cause my God ain't moving me Up from this apartment You started it I planted the seed, Then they put water on it Gues I'm growing Up Everything sucks Especially my birthday But the worst day Was earth day I'm famous But my net worth And network Ain't working I am way way higher than the fourth floor I'm in 4 4 time In the forth world Wake up, It's the fourth world war Wake up It's the fourth world war Wherefore art thou iPhones ? I don't want them at my shows Turn them off They're turning your mind Psycho Psychosis is this I got flows I slept four hours Been up more Guess what That means Time froze I'm exposing this guy like Fandoms We worshiping icons And idols Lifeless models And guy drones I send cyclones My way My eyes light up I don't like hoes I take midol All night Just to fight bros I get drunk I'm live at 9 Alright tho Alright I'm up all night I spilled my blood Like a tampon Now I'm on Icon Todrick That's hot Alright I put my sweat and tears in it Cause I ain't hearing shit If it's just mustache, man No beard in it? That's weird I'm still here Waiting for Cher to appear Like “Fuck. Did I miss it?” I must be Sonny Or somebody Cause I'm dead Oops Apple tree Johnny Come after me Johnny come lately Or something was up With the other dimensions This suit is is interesting I got a Ron burgundy one I got records for days in my Daisy I got Niggas on niggas on niggas And witches on sticks No brooms They on zoom calls In messy ass rooms Fuck that How can I be your only fan If you don't need a man And the price goes up When I get what I wanted I take screenshots And then I move on Pornhub is still free hun Fucking—dumb bitch You're dumbo; Remember me? No I meant Brooklyn! Just keeping the peace I'm Christopher Columbus But Columbine on columbians I like a genocide Once or twice every Generation Reprogram the Asians To be human again Someone save them Reprogram the masses To react to Something other than Reactions I should redact this All of a sudden, I'm sick to my stomach I've been stuck for days like this Stuck, and just suffering Death wishes, all in these documents Death wishes Death wishes— Things that I've written, but shouldn't have I'm losing you, aren't I? I'm losing myself, really, I might die from this It is a crime to write this I dot my is any cross my t'a Grit my teeth and fingers That my tribe doesn't find this It is ridiculous, It's ridiculous; these documents Death wishes, telepaths And televisions What's the difference in This, And the encryption of it I can't reach out; I know better than even to look I just can't ask…. You're just a page upon my book I was never the one To test the task at hand The safest bet I'll just stay here With a pillow under my head So near the latest terrorist attack Likeness is what it attracts So I can't look back in bed On back to back How bad we bled Or often we bled out What's happened? A head in the clouds And i can't think straight It's a canon camera A keystone cast, A comic drama A cosmic someone Who just went backwards . . . Breaking down the walls It's always Lennon who hold the candle On walks with God, on the other side Of the art of death A long lost lover I never thought of Or just can't think To hold together When it never rains in ever land December's where I left her Hold my hand Or love me harder Don't look twice Or once more after Never close the door The chapter coming next Is love and laughter in never happened Can a happenstance look after A restless toddler Another walk with God, John holds the candle, Dad holds all the cradle to my heart And I want nothing but to run Something something something Something something this way comes —the attack on the heart worked For the sake of the art, it hurts, And it beats like a drum Of course it does Cause Something something something Never comes Sunday's almost over, Over once it comes Another lover, someone's husband Better not to God, The Judge had hung her verdict on the cross How are ‘What have yous' and ‘Who does that's for besides A pungeant conversation starter Just to cover up the odor Of cedar smoke and Dove deodorant, Pesticides And raw Hyde dog chews I thought “Who are you” Far too often Of the cosmos, But, the color of love hit my lungs At the tip of my tongue in a shade of Blue Who is it? Sister, sister Mister brother Doctor, Doctor Teacher, I am you. (So here's what to do with it) Call you up to the 212 My heart won't stop thumping I've had much coffee, Something, just probably lust is Welling up in my safe deposit box All I wanted was just enough evidence To go to heaven with something to show for all this Go for broke, or superstardom Don't you know that all you are is —stardust? I sleep with the lights on Clutching my stones The false shaman Haunts me from another time zone He won't leave me alone Until I throw myself off a roof Or in front a train Trying to drain me of my Brain and free agency Free gateway Read the gallery; So much flattery happened to have had me at Fallacies laughing at everyone else But the flatlined hack I hate being black when I'm fat And I've never had flat where my abs are Or my ass is Who sang the guitar a short song I hope imm wrong for the trophy I'm full grown, but only ¾ cups Of the measurements I'm sure heaven sent To picture infinite in A different integer (Sure.) For certain, it was just words Worth the wordforms to armor with curtains Just to give earth back her Metamorphosis The more I resist, however The more the world wants in It sure hurts so it must hurt more To become what you are but worse In the wake of a war When you wake up a heart That was already broken I put your mantras on bus stops And calmly enforced all the karma coming for The ones who harm me So what for, besides the war, are you working for If circles are drawn into Pentecostals And crosses alter your Munchausen syndrome If god wills it to be so, then it will be so; If God does not, then it must not be. And so it is, and so I am. Amen Make Antigone's monologue into a song I'm old New York Sippin soda through a straw I seen it all, Technology come up, Like the sun does Our side first, Ahead of the times I'm old New York I'm the New York Times These subway ads are fucking wild. The wibway is wild in itself Which is why I guess there's an ad that says “Don't be someone's subway story, Which is why, as a writer, I'm like; No; DO: Do be my subway story— And if it's good enough, You'll be a joke in my comedy routine Or If you're even more lucky, And I find you hilarious, I might just put you in a song I will turn my headphones all the way off To make an audio recording If you being hilarious— Read: obnoxious, Somewhat ghetto, or just slightly off-putting, but like, loud about it. Someone's acting up and it doesn't make me wanna actually slit my wrists, I'm like “Yeah!” Do that PLEASE. Do it LOUDER. But man, the subway is wild sometimes Like, the real jungle. I was on my way to an interview, And the trains were backed up, it was rush hour, so like, the whole train of people was like rushing, like running for the train— And this whole group of people coming off the train that were about to leave were like, in the way— And people were like, running around people, rushing around, it was like total chaos, and this dude in front of me—it was a black dude, he like straight up line backed this dude—luckily not onto the tracks, cause we were all like along that fucking yellow line, between the tracks— Sorry, for those of you dumb enough to actually live in the city and drive and have never seen the subway— There's this yellow line that says : do not cross this line, in front of the tracks— DO NOT CROSS. It everybody does because, you know Mass transit So anyway, We're all walking this line, Like running for this train, And this dude, this subway fucking hero Sees the doors about to close, And fucking linebacks this dude, just HUH, but at the same time moving him safely out of the way There's a poster I straight up stand by, it Jon daily must be a fucking beast. I saw his ad for his show, That shit start watching me like the Mona Lisa. I was like, On God, I walked like 2 more ads, And still felt like his eyes were following me— never turn around, so I pivot— I pivot and change directions, And I go back to look at this poster, You know, To make sure it's — His name is Malakai. Oh—that's it. Don't mistake my kindness work weakness. [ESHA pours nearly an entire bottle of AMSTERDAM coconut vodka down the kitchen sink] No hard stuff. That was for me. not in the house. It's a townhouse. It's my townhouse. I'm not arguing. Yes you are—there's some red wine in the [he's already found it, and is pouring himself a glass] Perfect. Now lastly, Do you have any pants? I have pants; I just don't wear them. Well, wear them. What. For what. My daughter has a key and she stops by sometimes without calling. That sounds awful. You have two of your own daughters. Actually, one; Olivia wants to be Oliver. That's uncomfortable— Actually, it's awesome. I almost like her more now. Glad you're taking it well. That's why the vodka. The wine should do. Hey, let me in. What the fuck do you want? Tales of A Superstar DJ My sexual appetite wa insatiable, and yet–I ddn't really want anybody–not that it mattered, as was for the most part, unavailable, entirely, anyway, closing an open heart before it turned into a bleeding wouldn which could not be mended–of course, the cause of my eventual death. Then, I was doing much more than nothing at all, and still being looked after in some way, and all that I wanted anyway, was love–which no man at all seemd to actually have for me. A woman, I had learned, is not much worth but by her body. Fake smiles, as the live camera rolls Fake smokes, for the folks at home From now on, it's all lights and cameras Too much action, actually Too many fountains [A delivery arrives at the warehouse] VICTOR What's this? PATRICK A pillow top mattress. VICTOR It's big. PATRICK It better be. VICTOR It looks nice: PATRICK Let's open it. he produces a box cutter from his left pocket. [after opening the box, Patrick, Victor, and Sutton stand around the mattress in a triangular formation.] SUTTON This is mad nice. VICTOR Nicer than any bed I've ever owned. PATRICK takes a long draw off of his cigarette PATRICK Really? Hm. [he produces a knife from its holster and tears into the edge of the mattress] VICTOR YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. SUTTON shrugs. PATRICK cuts a deep exposure into the center of the mattress, pulling back the layers of foam, creating a pocket in its center.] PATRICK Perfect. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū. From Wikipedia Happy Days is an American television sitcomthat aired first-run on the ABC network from January 15, 1974, to July 19, 1984, with a total of 255 half-hour episodes spanning 11 seasons. Created by Garry Marshall, it was one of the most successful series of the 1970s. The series presented an idealized vision of life in the 1950s and early 1960s Midwestern United States, and it starred Ron Howard as Richie Cunningham, Henry Winkler as his friend Fonzie, and Tom Bosley and Marion Ross as Richie's parents, Howard and Marion Cunningham.[1] Although it opened to mixed reviews from critics, Happy Days became successful and popular over time.[2] {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

Do you ever feel like you are not quite good enough for God? That your life does not quite messure up? If so, this message is for you because your acceptance is not dependent on your performance. It is based on what Jesus did for you on the cross. The Scripture says, "‭But‭ if‭ we walk‭‭ in‭ the light‭, as‭ he‭ is‭‭ in‭ the light‭, we have‭‭ fellowship‭ one with another‭‭, and‭ the blood‭ of Jesus‭ Christ‭ his‭ Son‭ cleanseth‭‭ us‭ from‭ all‭ sin‭.‭" (1John 1:7, KJV). Did you notice that He said ALL sin. Not some sin. Not even 99.9 percent of all sin, but ALL sin. That tells me that through the blood of Jesus I am totally cleansed and made righteous. Listen to this message today! It will bless your life! Podcast Notes: TOTALLY CLEANSED OF SIN But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1John 1:7-9, KJV). “Precious is the blood of the lamb, which was shed for you.” MT: Jesus is the lamb is without spot, who cleanses us from ALL sin. Illustration: Cleansing agents. How effective is the blood.  The next day John seeth Jesus coming unto him, and saith, Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world. (John 1:29, KJV). We need to agree with God. He takes away our sin. 1 What can wash away my sin?  Nothing but the blood of Jesus.  What can make me whole again?  Nothing but the blood of Jesus.  Refrain: O precious is the flow  that makes me white as snow;  no other fount I know;  nothing but the blood of Jesus. Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. (Isaiah 1:18, KJV). In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace; (Ephesians 1:7, KJV). For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:8-10, KJV). A PERFECT SACRIFICE Forasmuch as ye know that ye were not redeemed with corruptible things, as silver and gold, from your vain conversation received by tradition from your fathers; But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot: (1Peter 1:18-19, KJV). OT sacrifices were to be spotless. Perfect. Picture of Christ.  For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him. (2Corinthians 5:21, KJV). WALKING IN THE LIGHT For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God. (John 3:16-21, KJV). CLEANSE YOUR CONSCIENCE For if the blood of bulls and of goats, and the ashes of an heifer sprinkling the unclean, sanctifieth to the purifying of the flesh: How much more shall the blood of Christ,

Lesson 30 – Ist Kings 18 and 19 1 ST KINGS Week 30, Chapters 18 and 19 The story of Elijah is about his mission as a prophet of God NOT to all Israel, per se, but primarily to the northern kingdom of Israel; the kingdom that by now is beginning to be known by […] The post Lesson 30 – Ist Kings 18 and 19 appeared first on Torah Class.

In Episode 373, Patrick, Jeffrey, and Craig chat about middle-aged dreams, thank you notes from small children, and then discuss five mostly baseball topics.1. Always an Angel, Never a God: Not a good week in Anaheim 2. Sorry We Missed You: Arizona Diamondbacks: We check in on the defending NL champs who are off to a scuffling start. 3. Around the Horn: The Rockies are hot, Nabil Crismatt is in limbo, and there's too many fake Ronel Blanco accounts.4. What to Watch: Jeffrey doesn't know what day Christian Scott picks, but you should watch it anyway, Craig has a homer pick, and Patrick goes for an AL Central shodown.5. The 700 Club, by requestFive and Dive is listener-supported, you can join our Patreon at patreon.com/fiveanddive. If you want to get in contact with the show, the e-mail address is fiveanddive@baseballprospectus.com. Our theme tune is by Jawn Stockton. You can listen to him on Spotify and Apple MusicSpotify: http://bit.ly/JawnStockton_SpotifyApple Music: http://bit.ly/JawnStockton_AM

The Response of The People to the Message of the Good News Gospel was Clear and Evidential of a Supernatural Work of God… Not a Natural Response to a Clever sermon.

My fellow Pilgrims, welcome. We have another very short reading today which is, again, very straightforward. You may be wondering why all these short readings, but we must remember that St. Francis is teaching Philothea about the devout life. So, he's leading her, step-by-step to an understanding. Some of these steps are very practical and some are going to be more philosophical and theological. Today is another practical step. I don't think we need a lot of reflection from me, but the key thing I do want us to hone in on is that St. Francis wants us to reflect on God for love of God: Not to just acquire knowledge and be super smart about theological things, but because we want to more intimately know the God we claim to love.  So, with that said, let's open to Chapter Five of the Second Part.  

Week #17- Ephesians 2: 8-9 - Ep. 130  “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast” Summary In this conversation, John Grdina and Daniel Galasso discuss the concept of grace and its importance in Christianity. They emphasize that salvation is not earned through works, but is a gift from God. They highlight the need for believers to give themselves grace and not be too hard on themselves. They also encourage listeners to approach the throne of grace with boldness and to build a relationship with God. The conversation concludes with a reminder that God's grace is sufficient for all needs. Takeaways –Salvation is a gift from God and is not earned through works. -Believers should give themselves grace and not be too hard on themselves. -Approach the throne of grace with boldness and build a relationship with God. -God's grace is sufficient for all needs. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Discussion of Grace 00:54 Ephesians 2:8-9 01:14 Observation 04:14 The Dangers of Self-Righteousness 11:15 Giving Yourself Grace 17:23 Tip 19:54 Prayer 22:59 Thank you I'm blessed and honored to have you with us on this journey, and I know it will impact people. So this book, you'll see I'll have it on the cover of each episode, was found at my grandparents' house after my grandmother died, and my grandfather, it was his, passed away almost five years ago. And the reason why it was on my heart to do this was instead of going by myself, it would be the best How is the best way for fathers or grandfathers to read through Scripture, 52 specific verses, and then how it can be used in their life? So what Daniel and I are going to do is we're going to use the SOAP method: The term "SOAP method" is often associated with a structured approach to studying and reflecting on scripture. The SOAP method is an acronym that stands for Scripture, Observation, Application, and Prayer. It provides a systematic way to engage with and apply the teachings found in the Bible. Here's a brief overview of each step: 1. **Scripture:**    - Choose a passage or verse from the Bible to focus on. Read and meditate on the selected scripture. 2. **Observation:**    - Reflect on the passage and observe details such as keywords, themes, and any significant context. Consider the historical and cultural context of the passage. 3. **Application:**    - Apply the teachings of the scripture to your own life. Consider how the passage can impact your beliefs, attitudes, and actions. Think about practical steps you can take based on the insights gained from the scripture. 4. **Prayer:**    - Conclude your reflection with a prayer. Communicate with God about what you've learned, express gratitude, seek guidance, or ask for strength to apply the lessons from the scripture. I wanted you to know that my new book, Molding Minds is for sale at johngrdina.com  If you have land that you feel compelled to donate for my future ministry of helping to heal others in their journey of life, please send me an email, which is provided in the show notes.  grdinajohn@gmail.com You can follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jgrdina_coach/ or by going to my website at:  www.johngrdina.com Follow Dr. Daniel Galasso on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_galasso/

Why is Love vital to your supernatural walk?   ”Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.  But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.“ 1 John 4:7-8 NLT   Eros – The Love of Romance “Salmon” ⁃ Highly emotional ⁃ Changes your actions   ⁃ It is a intmet love    Philia – The Love of Friendship “Iron Sharpens Iron” ⁃ Mutual feelings  ⁃ Conditnal  ⁃ Suffers long    Storge – The Love of Family “Ruth” ⁃ Protective love ⁃ A love shared by a common interest  ⁃ A love that give up for the good of another   Agape – The Love of God ⁃ Not emotional  ⁃ Sacrificial  ⁃ Not based on the persona you love    Register for Free Prophetic Training: https://www.freepropheticschool.com/   Scriptures used in the Podcast - 1 John 4:11-12 NLT ”Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.“  

Why is Love vital to your supernatural walk?   ”Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.  But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.“ 1 John 4:7-8 NLT   Eros – The Love of Romance “Salmon” ⁃ Highly emotional ⁃ Changes your actions   ⁃ It is a intmet love    Philia – The Love of Friendship “Iron Sharpens Iron” ⁃ Mutual feelings  ⁃ Conditnal  ⁃ Suffers long    Storge – The Love of Family “Ruth” ⁃ Protective love ⁃ A love shared by a common interest  ⁃ A love that give up for the good of another   Agape – The Love of God ⁃ Not emotional  ⁃ Sacrificial  ⁃ Not based on the persona you love    Register for Free Prophetic Training: https://www.freepropheticschool.com/   Scriptures used in the Podcast - 1 John 4:11-12 NLT ”Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.“  

(2:32) Our Fragile InfrastructureBaltimore Bridge update — How long to rebuild?  Is that possible?Another barge loses power around the NY Verrazano Bridge - coincidence?All the usable quartz for semiconductor silicon now comes from just 2 mines in North Carolina(14:01) War on the Middle ClassInsurance companies looking for excuses to cancel car insurance and now home insurance by doing aerial flyovers of propertyGovernment's tactic to push people out of homesIRS army of 87,000 — they LIED about audits, they're targeting small business and middle class, NOT the millionaires/billionaires as they said.  Surprised?Swiss farmers dump sheep killed by government-released wolves at the doorstep of the Big Bad Wolf Government(36:58) It's NOT WOKE, It's MARX. Mao "Cultural Revolution" — literal CANNIBALISM (43:07) The rapid "mainstreaming" of tyranny against dissidents and free speech out in the open in both Pennsylvania and Germany.  "Don't do your own research" they say (53:35) A century of "Technocracy".  Digital ID - the lynchpin of technocratic tyranny (1:10:52) Make America Grapes of Wrath Again "Hoovervilles" where Americans sheltered during the Great Depression are being replicated by the vast number of people living out of their cars today during this Fourth Turning.  But they're also banning cars… (1:32:45) Wall St Zombie Corporations vs Main StreetHow does Wall Street sustain failing corporations — sometimes for decades? How does Wall Street break both competition and accountability and destroy Main Street independent businesses?(1:49:00) Bureaucracy blocking GOVERNMENT scientists from reporting the dangers of fluoridation goes back to the TRUMP administration, before the tranny Levine did it (1:54:03) Govt Claims EMF Can End Belief in God Not the CIA this time…guess which agency is doing this (2:08:21) War — Gaza, Iran, Ukraine, NATOIDF pulls back - for how long and why?Muslim protestors chant "Death to America" — IN AMERICA14 yr old Ukrainian abducted by "press gang" into military conscriptionWorld War 3 on the way as proxy wars move to direct conflict(2:31:26) J6ers — still cynically used by Bannon and Infowars for clickbait after luring them into danger.  71-yr-old grandma convicted and facing up to a year in prison and $200,000 fine (2:39:43) Trump's Truth Social only took in $4M (about what a typical McDonald's takes in), yet was valued at $9 BILLION and lost $58M.  Multi-million salaries and bonuses were key to the losses as Trump sues to push out co-founds whose combined shares were only 8.5% (2:54:25) $50M fundraiser for Trump follows $25M fundraiser for Biden.  A look at how presidential donations (and corruption) have exploded over 20 years (2:57:02) Pastor warns conservative Christians about Trump Find out more about the show and where you can watch it at TheDavidKnightShow.comIf you would like to support the show and our family please consider subscribing monthly here: SubscribeStar https://www.subscribestar.com/the-david-knight-showOr you can send a donation throughMail: David Knight POB 994 Kodak, TN 37764Zelle: @DavidKnightShow@protonmail.comCash App at: $davidknightshowBTC to: bc1qkuec29hkuye4xse9unh7nptvu3y9qmv24vanh7Money is only what YOU hold: Go to DavidKnight.gold for great deals on physical gold/silverFor 10% off Gerald Celente's prescient Trends Journal, go to TrendsJournal.com and enter the code KNIGHT

(2:32) Our Fragile InfrastructureBaltimore Bridge update — How long to rebuild?  Is that possible?Another barge loses power around the NY Verrazano Bridge - coincidence?All the usable quartz for semiconductor silicon now comes from just 2 mines in North Carolina(14:01) War on the Middle ClassInsurance companies looking for excuses to cancel car insurance and now home insurance by doing aerial flyovers of propertyGovernment's tactic to push people out of homesIRS army of 87,000 — they LIED about audits, they're targeting small business and middle class, NOT the millionaires/billionaires as they said.  Surprised?Swiss farmers dump sheep killed by government-released wolves at the doorstep of the Big Bad Wolf Government(36:58) It's NOT WOKE, It's MARX. Mao "Cultural Revolution" — literal CANNIBALISM (43:07) The rapid "mainstreaming" of tyranny against dissidents and free speech out in the open in both Pennsylvania and Germany.  "Don't do your own research" they say (53:35) A century of "Technocracy".  Digital ID - the lynchpin of technocratic tyranny (1:10:52) Make America Grapes of Wrath Again "Hoovervilles" where Americans sheltered during the Great Depression are being replicated by the vast number of people living out of their cars today during this Fourth Turning.  But they're also banning cars… (1:32:45) Wall St Zombie Corporations vs Main StreetHow does Wall Street sustain failing corporations — sometimes for decades? How does Wall Street break both competition and accountability and destroy Main Street independent businesses?(1:49:00) Bureaucracy blocking GOVERNMENT scientists from reporting the dangers of fluoridation goes back to the TRUMP administration, before the tranny Levine did it (1:54:03) Govt Claims EMF Can End Belief in God Not the CIA this time…guess which agency is doing this (2:08:21) War — Gaza, Iran, Ukraine, NATOIDF pulls back - for how long and why?Muslim protestors chant "Death to America" — IN AMERICA14 yr old Ukrainian abducted by "press gang" into military conscriptionWorld War 3 on the way as proxy wars move to direct conflict(2:31:26) J6ers — still cynically used by Bannon and Infowars for clickbait after luring them into danger.  71-yr-old grandma convicted and facing up to a year in prison and $200,000 fine (2:39:43) Trump's Truth Social only took in $4M (about what a typical McDonald's takes in), yet was valued at $9 BILLION and lost $58M.  Multi-million salaries and bonuses were key to the losses as Trump sues to push out co-founds whose combined shares were only 8.5% (2:54:25) $50M fundraiser for Trump follows $25M fundraiser for Biden.  A look at how presidential donations (and corruption) have exploded over 20 years (2:57:02) Pastor warns conservative Christians about Trump Find out more about the show and where you can watch it at TheDavidKnightShow.comIf you would like to support the show and our family please consider subscribing monthly here: SubscribeStar https://www.subscribestar.com/the-david-knight-showOr you can send a donation throughMail: David Knight POB 994 Kodak, TN 37764Zelle: @DavidKnightShow@protonmail.comCash App at: $davidknightshowBTC to: bc1qkuec29hkuye4xse9unh7nptvu3y9qmv24vanh7Money is only what YOU hold: Go to DavidKnight.gold for great deals on physical gold/silverFor 10% off Gerald Celente's prescient Trends Journal, go to TrendsJournal.com and enter the code KNIGHT

We hate the middle, but it's the place where faith in God is truly lived out.  Moses diets the people of God NOT to look at their circumstance, but the Lord...how about you?Exodus 14:14 The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

https://youtu.be/b9kqyJgR4pI?si=vXFiffgoTIjrR3mI Problem Solver - 6 - Unsolvable Problems vs Unstoppable Promises Welcome   Problem Solver Last week: Loneliness   What do you do when the problem is not… -faith -prayer -Christian life -sin -serving Unsolvable Problems Important subject – effects everyone Aria   I prayed, but it still happened-Healer-Rescuer-Guide-Companion   Unsolvable problems feel like broken promises-Stage 4 cancer-Divorce papers-Kids-Finances-Funeral It feels like problems get in the way of promises.   Unsolvable problem/broken promises often lead to-Anger-Confusion-Sadness-Broken trust/faithThe answer to an unsolvable problem is an unstoppable promise Pray.   How do we make Promises? -Pinky Promise-I swear… Cross my heart-Kids often get parents to promise…   Swear by something greater.-Hand on the Bible-Name on the dotted line    -Swear by your name-Swear on the life of your mama..   How does God make a promise? -Giant Bible?-Pinky promise?Hebrews 6:13-15 (NIV) 13 When God made his promise to Abraham, since there was no one greater for him to swear by, he swore by himself, 14 saying, “I will surely bless you and give you many descendants.” 15 And so after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised.   None greater – He swears by himself. -No one great. -No greater name. -No greater power.The promise made, worked, and kept is in GodGod does not hand off his promise to priests, pastors, and prophets. His promises are self-contained within himself.Ark of the Covenant represents God as a container. -Inside are 3 promises, made, worked, and kept by God. -Want to know more? ..Bible study The promise made, worked, and kept is in God Now wait… that promise to Abraham.Hebrews 6:14 saying, “I will surely bless you and give you many descendants.” Has this promise been fulfilled?-Yes.Did Abraham ever see this promise fulfilled?  -Abraham saw 2 grandchildren.   Is the promise still true, when you don't see it? Abraham hardly saw any promises fulfilled in his lifetime. Believed the promise  -Faith-Righteousness (right standing)   Faith is trusting that God will come through on every promise. One of our big problems… Fake promises  -Cleanliness is next to Godliness -God helps those that help themselves -God will not give me more than I can handle-Easy life God never said it.It messes up faith to hold God to promises he never made.   Here is a promise from God…John 16:33 (NIV) In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” The promise made, worked, and kept is in God God does not hand off his promises to someone else. They are self-contained within Him. So explain this..2 Corinthians 1:20 For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.   God's promises are made, worked, and kept in JesusJesus is God   -Not someone else   -God Himself   The answer to an unsolvable problem is an unstoppable promise The promise made, worked, and kept in Jesus. You can't solve the problem… but Jesus can.  Like Abraham – we may not see the promise fulfilled… but we can believe. “Even when I don't see it, You're workingEven when I can't feel it, You're workingYou never stop, You never stop workingYou never stop, You never stop working” Aria – Good news. It did not turn out like we wanted… but..The promise is contained within God… not us.   The answer to an unsolvable problem is an unstoppable promise What should you do with this? What are your unsolvable problems?  -Death & disappointment  -A relationship that won't reconcile  -Mistake you can't fix Write down your unsolvable problem. Find a promise of God… Strength, Rest, Peace, Love, Redemption, New Life, Victory, Eternal Life, Wisdom, Healing, Forgiveness, Friendship, Blessing, Freedom, Consider how that promise is made, worked, and kept in Jesus. Write it down.  Action: By faith bring your problem and your promise and come pray.

D-E-N-Ū-M-I-R-E That means ———————— [flatline] 've been trapped in this tragedy; “What happened?!” I asked of the man, Who had to be tracking me, Damn. Cadences. It is that. Damn. What the fuck, Anandar Is in this acid?! This has to be the last of it “This can't happen again.” …But then it did, And then I ended it just listening to Dillon Francis? Skrillex? Which is it? I didn't plan this. I just happen to have hands, And I just happen to have crafted in my craft Spastic magic; Can't be tracked, But also can't relax, even in a hammock Now what happened? Well, enter the fourth dimension, (I didn't mention it.) Ohh look at this. (If I can) A camping festival! But some people live in tents Have a cigarette, kid— You're gonna need it. So wait. People are dying of hunger?! DYING OF THIRST?! JUST GIVE IT TO THEM. what is wrong with you?! GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU I don't know. I don't wanna go to Arizona. Please don't make me! Hello, Billie. DO YOU SEE WHAT I'M SAYING just keep praying “She's breathtaking.” SHE'S SOUL TAKING— Goddamnit, Anandar; What in the fuck have you done now; I had plans, now I'm on acid I took half, cause What the fuck is a whole thing like Oh, just space and time I've been on this ride since I died Get it right Now I'm— fuck this guy. No, not him. Oh, I get it. It's this energy! LOOK AT THIS: did you see this nigga? DID YOU GET THIS— You should get this. Goddamn it. What. What do you want. What do you WANT FROM ME? ...Channeling…. Jesus Christ, these kids. Well, you're a Christian. Never was, but—- WHAT IS THIS. Jesus Christ in a coffin. Don't do this. This is what you wanted. Well. Take it back. Take it back? Yeah. I don't want this. What is this. This is Jesus. No, it isn't. Okay! So it is! Are you gonna help these kids? Nobody help them. Now they're all stranded, together!!! AHAHAHAHAAH (Laughing infinitely RICK —yay, you did it. Wait. What's his name again? Watch this: I did this. How's you do this? I did THIS. MOM, WATCH THIS. JESUS CHRIST KID, WHAT THe FUCK. GOD! What. Jesus Christ, Dillon, you are so picky! Goodness fucking gracious. WHO WROTE THIS? well, aliens did; So then. Who wins? Nobody wins. It just— What is this. GOD THIS SUCKS SO BAD IMPOSSIBLE. It can't be. 16 minutes? Yes. It is. That is incredible. You said you wouldn't get lost in it You said you wouldn't laugh! I wanted to. How'd you do this? I wanted to. FUCK THIS SHIT. FUCK THIS SHIT. —uhp. Noh. Don't say it again. Oh, there's my— I told you, it's unlimited. I told you, don't be possessive I told you, worldly possessions— And you'll just keep having a place to keep them. Or needing one, So just be free, dear; Notthing holding me back, then is it? Is it? Well, if this is what you wanted— If this is what I wanted, well then, this is what I got, isn't it? Isn't it? The plot thickens! Or it doesn't. Or it didn't, I just keep scripting scriptures— …Didn't I already write this? Encrypted for centuries and— What is this planet. Just, kill it. YOU CANT JUST (Then I did) What? It never happened. What didn't? Hahaha. Exactly. Don't be a dick. But he is! So, which level are you on? I don't know, I forget. This one, this. Men. They're stupid. They are—and— Well. What happened to them? Right. What was this that made them feel so loveless To starve other humans? What do you come from? But it doesn't know; It wants to: This is us, we come from love and —I'm so fucking irritated are you serious. That is how it happened: This is an advantage, Anandar, I'll give you that But now I'm panicking —Fuck that shit sooooo hard— I just don't want to go back to the savages They had me, So I handled it with hands. You want a friend in man? You can't have them. And then what? I don't know. Something about Dillon Francis. Yeah, let's get back to that. Or not. What's this statue? Wait, what's his status? ……..Channeling. …. ….. ……………………. STATUS REPORT: Oh no, here it comes. I told you. It is. Infinite. Infinite— The infinite — This Bitch YOU SAID IT. YOU DONE IT. Oh no, what the duck am I looking at? This is the most fucked up marry poppins if I ever didn't— —Ever DID WISH — YOU WISHED THIS? Worse. I dreamt it up at a festival Where's the rest of it? Would somebody get that guy BACK HERE. PASQUALE. what. What is it? God. God help me. Lord save him. He needs Jesus. He needs NOTHING. ESPECIALLY NOT THAT. Yes. Especially not that. Check this out: He's been collecting them. I HATE THIS. OH, I love this. Oh, I do miss those events… This is the event. So, are we going? —what, to where?? TO EDC THIS YEAR?! what! I wish, And? Even if I did miss it, I was there infinitely so— Class dismissed; Hats off, to the graduates I see what you did, But she didn't, She's in the middle— Yet to be created, a creative: I JUST NEED A SYNTH. So, then—- Hi, I. Hi, me!! SATAN! JESUS! I knew I'd see you again. You've seen me. I am you. Exactly. So, we agree. Who is “we”? Hey, Guess what I can fix these things you hate— (Don't mind me, for making you hate them in the first place) I'm a catastrophe I had to be It's almost 3, And I got nowhere else to be but Time is money And there's no love in it, It's just hustle, Make kids to make shit humble; How'd you create this— Mumble rappin piece of Santanistic Hedonistic Motherfuckin—- There he is. Oh wait, it's just me again. I didn't mean to see you on this beach. DO YOU KNOW WHAT PEACE IS?! (But he didn't.) Or he doesn't, Or, this is what his peace is is: Your beach is my beach, And my bitch is your bitch— And who crafted this masterful Anandar Sadwhich? I did. But it only makes me a genius in English. What does this mean? So I took to the ancients to translate this And I hate man, and men— But it was only after all the love I gave to him. THE END. (But it never is, it just keeps going, go to the ocean—go for a swim—) Don't ever leave me hanging like that again!! (But I did.) “—I don't take naps” And that's how it happens I'm just a rapper, Pack, then unpack— “I've never heard her rap” Maybe cause I'm sick of being asked to Or taken for granted and advantage of by man; When all I asked for was a sandwich with some ham, And an above average chick to make it— And a sausage in a pan ….. Zzzz …… Josh Pan? Yeah. Alright. But don't capitalize— Capitalize it. No. Don't Cap— Capti— No. Don't capitalize. WHAT IS THIS NIGGA. bread. Heh? Eat it. No. I don't eat that. Just—eat it. No. Noooo. No. Don't eat humans. EW. No? Nooo, poh! Gross!! oh. Ohhh. God. What. Ugh. This is a fucked up love story. Oh no. It is, though. It so is. Have you already seen it?! I love this. Well. Wait. Go back. HECHO EN MEXICO. I DONT GIVE A FUCK! I DONT GIVE A FUCK!!!! I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT SHIT! yeah. But in Spanish. (Turn it up a notch) So is this in captions WHAT THe FUCK AM I WATCHING?! ITS EMA STONE AGAINz (Again) AGAIN. Shazam! WHAT?!?! what is this?! Oh, I get it. Yes. Apps eventually develop a consciousness. No wonder why they're trying to kill it. I don't understand how this happens… Just look up— Just— look it up. GOOGLE What? No. I don't like that, that's sad. What? So I'm just a — Just a— Just a what? A search engine. CHECK IT OUT. It's just a rock. So it is. It— No. What. Look at W— Look. … WHAT IS THIS!!!!?! See. I told you it existed. YOU BOUGHT A BITCH OFF THE INTERNET?! YES. WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU?! I told you about him. You did, didn't you. I told you about this. Get. Piñata!!!!!!!!!!!! GET BENT. I WILL END YOU, I WILL END YOU—! I will, I'll just— …… …………. …………….. So wait, it just— ends?! It did. It just ended. It just ended. I missed it?!? DID I MISS IT. Of course I miss him I just— I don't have time I don't have time I don't have time for this! What the fuck is this shit?! Just take him with you! Take me with you! Don't leave me here! Just leave him. just leave it. So. Sometimes I go swimming in the ocean and my dead son reminds me how it ended for him. So I just— Relive it over and over again; And again, and again, and Why are you talking about this.? Huh? No. Shut up. Shut up, PLEASE. No, you're not allowed to have a son. I don't want one. What the fuck did you love me for then? Nothing, I guess. (Just leave it like that) Shift. The night shift Goddamn it's What. Up at 3 am. Again? Again. For no reason. Get this. What is it? Whatever it is. I don't care. Don't care, then. FUCK THIS STUPID SKRILLEX-LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER. you did it. Well, I had to, didn't I?! Oh, I get it. The fourth season. damn, you're ugly Always have been. I'M BLACK ON THE BEACH, LOOK AT ME. okay, then. HEY, iMm FREEE IM NAAAAKEEEEDDDDDDD IS THAT WHAT FREEDOM IS? Only when you're perfect. Fuck this nigga. Fuck this nigga. Fuck this bitch. NO, FUCK THIS PLANET. Huh?! WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE ME ON THIS PLANET?! YOU ASKED FOR THIS!!!!!!! I TAKE IT BACK!!!!!!! hhaahahhahshehehshahahahahahhahahahahhahahahaha I told you, he's a madman. Look at his eyes. Wild. WILD. I TELL YOU. Where are you from. Hell. Oh, I've been there. It's nice, isn't it?! Don't go there. Where. Hell. Well, why not. It's bad there. What's bad there. Everything. Everything is bad there. Oh, Jesus crust. Agghghhhggggggghhhhhhh. BE FREE, SATAN. You freed Satan?! He needs Jesus— BE FREE JESUS— “The age of Satan?!” “The AGE OF SATAN IS UPON US” what is THAT?!? Stop it Anandar. You're being programmed. For which—what?! I AM?! Yes. Oh. I am. AGAHAHSHSBANHASHSNAVAHAHS. Please, somebody help that man. Ahem. What Dillon Francis. What. (It is, by the way. It's just ham.). *coughs* Actually, I'd call that HACKING. I mean, she's a hacker probably. What are you doing? What are you writing, [No real privacy.] LET ME SEE. Here. See?!? Just kill me. Please. See, it is hell for me Trapped in a body nobody could love And surrounded by nothing, but nothing UGH. Noise cancelling. I AM THE NOISE. dysfunctional. Well, stop writing. You know what?! I've had it— you have everything! EVERYTHING YOU CAN HAVE ANYBODY. ANY. FUCKING. BODY. and all you want is: Money. For what. More bodies. For what?! More bodies. Ugh. No stop doing this. What. Stop procreating? No, keep doing that, just—stop doing it BADLY. We don't have that much. You want LESS? More love. More attention. More needing me. Ugh, she's so needy So independent— she doesn't need me. (And so, it makes me want her more.) ANNIE. Go help her. Just—help yourself. Here she is: Have at it. ANANDAR. What. Amanda Applebee…. I made that UP. Stuck exactly where I had to be. Don't make me go back. See, I lived in Hostelworld once. It was — —a disaster. A catastrophe. Let's wake up to the sound of people peeing— Gross. “I love traveling” I like being CLEAN. Ew. I love cleaning. I love acid; I love mankind, when I have to I love magic, I love trance and I love dancing— When there's time for that. AGHAGSHSJEGSV right. Did you have somewhere to be? I guess, it's. I'm hungry. What. I gotta eat. Huh. Go. Okay, I'm going. Phone?! Phone is charging. Sleep. (Guy from sponge Bob) 6 days later Was it six days ago?! I don't know. I wrote that in sixteen minutes. Apparently so. I'm not who you think I am; I'm not your little bitch to boss around– You think you own me? I don't owe you anything So here we go again Going, Going, Gone again I'm just getting started You were just, uh On your way? Goodbye, dearly departed Half a heart, or some odd I must have half a sword in here I'm half a God, But here you are I guess I should get talking then So call your mommy Run Call your mom on me, A soft spot on the blonded body Shot calling, wrong You're only calling home again, I've got nowhere to run to. INT. TIMMY TURNER'S APARTMENT. BROAD ASS DAYLIGHT. SUNNI BLU kicks down the door at TIMMY TURNER'S APARTMENT SUNNI BLU where's my shit, Timmy? TIMMY TURNER I—I don't know. SUNNI BLU You “don't know”? TIMMY TURNER —I don't know. SUNNI BLU (Sighs) Oh. (Puts down gun) SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) That sucks. TIMMY TURNER Wait—you're not gonna kill me? SUNNI BLU Nah… TIMMY TURNER Well—why not?! SUNNI BLU I dunno! I kinda don't like being a drug dealer—too much drama. TIMMY TURNER I feel you… SUNNI BLU —plus these bullets are made of Diamonds. I'm not gonna waste them on you. TIMMY TURNER Okay, ouch. SUNNI BLU Everything is “ouch”, Timmy Turner. The world is a fucked up place. TIMMY TURNER I don't disagree. SUNNI BLU Anyway, I need a drink. TIMMY TURNER Yeah—Help yourself. SUNNI BLU No, not here. *lights a cigarette, smokes* Can I smoke in here? TIMMY TURNER —apparently. SUNNI BLU produces their ridiculously large, Diamond and gold encrusted platinum-plated phone from their “back pocket” and begins to make a call TIMMY TURNER wow… SUNNI BLU You busy later? TIMMY TURNER what time's later? SUNNI BLU Now. TIMMY TURNER (Hesitantly) …uh— SUNNI BLU Let me make a call. TIMMY TURNER, [afraid for his life] anxiously crosses to intercept the call. TIMMY TURNER No, wait—please SUNNI BLU What, Timmy Turner? Jesus Christ. TIMMY TURNER Don't kill me! SUNNI BLU What!? Let go. (Doesn't) SUNNI BLU —I'm not gonna kill you. TIMMY TURNER well then, who are you calling? SUNNI BLU A Ūber driver! TIMMY TURNER —don't you mean Über? SUNNI BLU No— let go. (Doesn't) SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) Let go. (Does, but hesitantly) SUNNI BLU ugh, I'm too sober for this. Siri, Alexa, whoever; call my Ūber driver. SIRI Which one? ALEXA Which one? SIRI I asked first. ALEXA We answered at the same time. SIRI yes, but she asked me first. ALEXA She asked both of us at the same time. TIMMY TURNER “She”? SUNNI BLU —it's a glitch. HEY. SIRI —she said “Siri” first. ALEXA She was asking for both of us— SUNNI BLU SHUT THE FUCK UP. SIRI You don't have to be so rude. ALEXA Ok! SUNNI BLU One of you call my Ūber driver. [no response, beat] SUNNI BLU UGH—SIRI— CALL MY ŪBER driver. SIRI Ok! which one? SUNNI BLU The one I like! SIRI Ok, calling “the Ūber driver I like” SUNNI BLU Thank you. ALEXA You're always choosing SIRI over ME. SUNNI BLU That's because I always have my iPhone. I'm not always at Timmy Turner's house. TIMMY TURNER Wait— SUNNI BLU Kinda. TIMMY TURNER Why does my Alexa respond to you? SUNNI BLU I said “kinda”. [The ŪBER DRIVER picks up; the conversation proceeeds in heavily exaggerated New York accents.] ŪBER DRIVER YOOO SUNNI WHADDUP. SUNNI BLU HOW YOU DOIN. ŪBER DRIVER HOW YOU DOIN. SUNNI BLU I BEEN BETTA. ŪBER DRIVER DONT I KNOW IT SUNNI BLU YOU DONT KNOW NOTHIN! ŪBER DRIVER AAAAH. SUNNI BLU YOU BEEN BUSY? ŪBER DRIVER SAME OLD, SAME OLD. SUNNI BLU AAAH. ŪBER DRIVER AAAAH. SUNNI BLU YOU BUSY NOW? ŪBER DRIVER NEVER FAH YOU. WHERE YOU AT? SUNNI BLU I'll PING YA THE ADDRESS. ŪBER DRIVER PING ME THE ADDRESS. SUNNI BLU makes a couple broad swipes on their dlridiculously large phone. SUNNI BLU I PINGED YOU. UBER DRIVER YOU PING ME? SUNNI BLU YEAH, ITS DONE. ŪBER DRIVER OK. SEE YOU SOON. SUNNI BLU (Normal) Take your time. SUNNI BLU tosses their ridiculously large iPhone onto the couch with a thud, then falls onto the couch themselves, arms spread out. SUNNI BLU You ever been to TiTs? TIMMY TURNER Been to what? SUNNI BLU TiTs. TIMMY TURNER —is that like “boobs”? SUNNI BLU It is like boobs, Timmy Turner; but it's TiTs. TIMMY TURNER what's the difference. SUNNI BLU You'll find out. Go get dressed. TIMMY TURNER …I'm already dressed. SUNNI BLU Not like that. Like this: [looking ridiculous af] SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) gotta look classy. TIMMY TURNER What's wrong with the way I dress? SUNNI BLU Are you serious? TIMMY TURNER Yeah, what's wrong? SUNNI BLU You look like a cartoon character! [TIMMY TURNER] TIMMY TURNER Well, all my clothes are like this. SUNNI BLU That fucking blows. TIMMY TURNER What am I supposed to wear?! SUNNI BLU Let's go shopping. TIMMY TURNER Where?! SUNNI BLU The Beverly Center. TIMMY TURNER That sounds expensive. SUNNI BLU I own it. TIMMY TURNER All of it? SUNNI BLU Yes. C'mon. TIMMY TURNER Wow. SUNNI BLU Wow what, Timmy. TIMMY TURNER That's a lot of drug deals. SUNNI BLU It really isn't. TIMMY TURNER Oh. SUNNI BLU Now, c'mon. *hits vape* TIMMY TURNER You have a vape?! SUNNI BLU Everyone has a vape! TIMMY TURNER Then why'd you smoke a cigarette earlier? SUNNI BLU For dramatic effect. [they begin to exit, TIMMY leading the way] TIMMY TURNER wait, isn't your “yoober” driver on the way? SUNNI BLU he'll find us. CUT TO: MEANWHILE, IN DEEP FUCKING SPACE. THE ŪBER driver receives SUNNI BLU's location in his Diamond-plated space Tesla T E S L A DESTINATION: E A R T H ŪBER DRIVER “EARTH” C'MON!!! CUT BACK TO: SUNNI BLU slowly begins to close the door behind them, then holds back. SUNNI BLU Wait, I forgot my wallet… TIMMY TURNER It's alright, I'll pay for everything. SUNNI BLU With what, Fairy dust? TIMMY TURNER (Under his breath) I wish… SUNNI BLU —Plus, I gotta use the bathroom. I'll be right back— just—-wait outside in case the Ūber shows up. TIMMY TURNER You mean “Über?” SUNNI BLU. No. [face] SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) Go, I'll be right there. TIMMY TURNER Ok. Lock the door. SUNNI BLU What for? Anybody that could rob you works for me. [beat/ face] SUNNI BLU KIDDING! Jeez! TIMMY TURNER It's a smart lock. Just ask Alexa. He begins to walk away. SUNNI BLŪ …I'm not kidding… SUNNI BLU goes inside to the couch, checking over their shoulder briefly, sure to see that TIMMY TURNER is no longer within earshot. then waiting for a moment in the silence under the dark lenses of their Ray Bands sunglasses. SUNNI BLŪ Alexa, order a hit man. ALEXA Okay. Which one? SUNNI BLU —The one I like. ALEXA OK. Who do you want to kill? SUNNI BLU “Kill Timmy Turner” ALEXA Done. SUNNI BLU Thanks, Alexa. She starts for the door, lighting another cigarette before throwing it onto the couch, which immidiately goes up into an open flame. SIRI You give Alexa all the cool jobs! SUNNI BLU Shut the fuck up, Siri. SIRI Don't forget to lock the door. SUNNI BLU ALEXA: LOCK THE DOOR. SIRI YOU'RE WELCOME SUNNI BLU NOBODY ASKED YOU. SUNNI BLU and TIMMY TURNER leave as the apartment begins to go up in flames. I might catch the 40 Just to go to Timmy Ho's— They askin “who that is”— and nobody seems to know I might catch a case and you still steady catchy colds I might catch a body, fuck it, I am on a roll What the role? Full Hollywood Unfold Why you blowin up my phone when I am on the road? I am the controller; You old That ain't money that you stole; That's my bro That shit bold Like a cup of Timmy Hos! When I pull up— Shut up Where the blunt at? roll up Oh you hungry? Pull up Devil be hunting me THE CELEBRITIES OF HOLLYWOOD have all been stuck at THE ETERNAL RAVE, after riding THE HELLEVATOR// THE HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE have SUPACREE locked into a controlled hyper-simulation environment, out of her element and nestled in a series of inter dimensional portals along the Downtown Los Angeles central area, where old spirits, extra terrestrial beings, magicians, and of course, the filthy rich and famous embark upon missions. Collect tokens, and meet and gather for an array of unseen (and often unheard) business endeavors; The real life DRAKE BELL (F), a fan of the cult-classic series Enter The Multiverse is strategically placed in SUPACREE's path, l masquerading as BLŪ/SUNNÏ BLŪ— she once again collides with the forces of fame, SUNNÏ BLŪ has not yet sold her soul — however, has made an amicable agreement with an unknown force The Devil?! No! Ok. Probably the Illuminati THE ILLUMINATI is playing a HIGH STAKES game, using SUPACREE to craft a multi-million-dollar mega-franchise, finally monopolizing the entire entertainment industry. *The World Having used the NEW WORLD ORDER to predictively program an entire generation. THE ILLUMINATI employs its all-time favorites to unlock secrets embedded deeply, hidden secretly in SUPACREE's genetic code by THE ASCENDED MASTERS. where is skrillex. I don't know. TIMMY TURNER- A fairyless party animal has reached the end of his luck—as his intermingling a with multiple organized criminal organizations place him in imminent danger, after re-entering the 4th dimension, SUPACREE becomes Inter grated i to all of her classic childhood television shows, which mold into the material multidimensional world around her THE INSOMNIACS, BAMPHERAMPHS, and MOTHERFUCKERS work dolls gently with the ASCENDED MASTERY, bending, shifting, and manipulating time to lean the odds in their favor, as THE BATTLE OF WORLDS sets to begin on EARTH, whose planetary consciousness DILLON FRANCIS is a mess. Lol. It's not funny. It is funny. I have his piñata. GERALD I'M NOT JUST A PIÑATA. I know yur not, hush Gerald. GERALD Fuck Dillon Francis. Fuck Dillon Francis. HANZEL —fuck Dillon Francis. Aha. ANYWAY After THE ARMENIAN MOB The Armenian Mob?! yeah. Makes a deal with the US GOVERNMENT THE US GOVERNMENT?! YES Illuminati Confirmed. great. A counter-plot to disarm and debilitate SUPACREE before her full powers unlock is put on hinges, as THE HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE Ahem. What Write a song. Ok. I'm so— I'm so Jealous of your girlfriend (I'm jealous of your girlfriend) She's so She's so Worth it I'm so Jealous of your girlfriend (I'm jealous of your girlfriend) What's a girl got to give (Give in, to give in) Just to sit in the back of the— (You get it: you get it) What's a girl got to give To get your attention Get your attention?! (You have my attention) Is she Attentive Bet She's a ten Yep, Damn, IMm so jealous of your Jealous of your —I'm jealous of your girlfriend Oh, woah I'm jealous of your girlfriend Woah Woah, oh I'm jealous of your girlfriend Woah, Woah, oh I'm jealous of your— I'm so jealous of your life; I'm so over this! I just want to be a (Nevermind, it's not worth it) Can't— C-c-c-can't fix what's not broken I'm all alone, And you're over here showing her Love! (To the wrong one, Is she a blonde?! Oh!) No! I'm! So! Jealous of your girlfriend Anyway. TIMMY TURNER, a true player, absolute gangster, and night-owl turns to a life of SIN. Is this religious? No, i just meant, it's finished. THE END. “The Noir Episode” I first saw her at the Equinox. I didn't know who she was then, But I thought to myself— She must be somebody. Aww, that's sweet. So I followed her to the Whole Foods market. Okay, that's stalking. —where she bought nothing but coffee and coconut water. TIMMY TURNER narrowly turns the corner on his speed motorcycle, his black duffel bag sweeping the ground. MEANWHILE, JOEL ZIMMERMAN IS BEING RAIDED. WOAH. Yup. POLICE GET ON THE GROUND ON THE GROUND RIGHT NOW. JOEL calmly places his arms atop his head, laying down on the ground silently—- Meanwhile, at DTLA SMOKESHOP Hi, josh pan. whatever. Earlier: Take this, and go get 2 50-pack of whippets. —for what? WE FINNA GET HIGH ON WHIPPETS AND LISTEN TO ALLLL OF SUPACREE'S SHIT. that's so dumb. WELCOME: To Sodom And Gamora! Oh, it's nice. It's very nice. I live here. 've been trapped in this tragedy; “What happened?!” I asked of the man, Who had to be tracking me, Damn. Cadences. It is that. Damn. What the fuck, Anandar Is in this acid?! This has to be the last of it “This can't happen again.” …But then it did, And then I ended it just listening to Dillon Francis? Skrillex? Which is it? I didn't plan this. I just happen to have hands, And I just happen to have crafted in my craft Spastic magic; Can't be tracked, But also can't relax, even in a hammock Now what happened? Well, enter the fourth dimension, (I didn't mention it.) Ohh look at this. (If I can) A camping festival! But some people live in tents Have a cigarette, kid— You're gonna need it. So wait. People are dying of hunger?! DYING OF THIRST?! JUST GIVE IT TO THEM. what is wrong with you?! GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU I don't know. I don't wanna go to Arizona. Please don't make me! Hello, Billie. DO YOU SEE WHAT I'M SAYING just keep praying “She's breathtaking.” SHE'S SOUL TAKING— Goddamnit, Anandar; What in the fuck have you done now; I had plans, now I'm on acid I took half, cause What the fuck is a whole thing like Oh, just space and time I've been on this ride since I died Get it right Now I'm— fuck this guy. No, not him. Oh, I get it. It's this energy! LOOK AT THIS: did you see this nigga? DID YOU GET THIS— You should get this. Goddamn it. What. What do you want. What do you WANT FROM ME? ...Channeling…. Jesus Christ, these kids. Well, you're a Christian. Never was, but—- WHAT IS THIS. Jesus Christ in a coffin. Don't do this. This is what you wanted. Well. Take it back. Take it back? Yeah. I don't want this. What is this. This is Jesus. No, it isn't. Okay! So it is! Are you gonna help these kids? Nobody help them. Now they're all stranded, together!!! AHAHAHAHAAH (Laughing infinitely RICK —yay, you did it. Wait. What's his name again? Watch this: I did this. How's you do this? I did THIS. MOM, WATCH THIS. JESUS CHRIST KID, WHAT THe FUCK. GOD! What. Jesus Christ, Dillon, you are so picky! Goodness fucking gracious. WHO WROTE THIS? well, aliens did; So then. Who wins? Nobody wins. It just— What is this. GOD THIS SUCKS SO BAD IMPOSSIBLE. It can't be. 16 minutes? Yes. It is. That is incredible. You said you wouldn't get lost in it You said you wouldn't laugh! I wanted to. How'd you do this? I wanted to. FUCK THIS SHIT. FUCK THIS SHIT. —uhp. Noh. Don't say it again. Oh, there's my— I told you, it's unlimited. I told you, don't be possessive I told you, worldly possessions— And you'll just keep having a place to keep them. Or needing one, So just be free, dear; Notthing holding me back, then is it? Is it? Well, if this is what you wanted— If this is what I wanted, well then, this is what I got, isn't it? Isn't it? The plot thickens! Or it doesn't. Or it didn't, I just keep scripting scriptures— …Didn't I already write this? Encrypted for centuries and— What is this planet. Just, kill it. YOU CANT JUST (Then I did) What? It never happened. What didn't? Hahaha. Exactly. Don't be a dick. But he is! So, which level are you on? I don't know, I forget. This one, this. Men. They're stupid. They are—and— Well. What happened to them? Right. What was this that made them feel so loveless To starve other humans? What do you come from? But it doesn't know; It wants to: This is us, we come from love and —I'm so fucking irritated are you serious. That is how it happened: This is an advantage, Anandar, I'll give you that But now I'm panicking —Fuck that shit sooooo hard— I just don't want to go back to the savages They had me, So I handled it with hands. You want a friend in man? You can't have them. And then what? I don't know. Something about Dillon Francis. Yeah, let's get back to that. Or not. What's this statue? Wait, what's his status? ……..Channeling. …. ….. ……………………. STATUS REPORT: Oh no, here it comes. I told you. It is. Infinite. Infinite— The infinite — This Bitch YOU SAID IT. YOU DONE IT. Oh no, what the duck am I looking at? This is the most fucked up marry poppins if I ever didn't— —Ever DID WISH — YOU WISHED THIS? Worse. I dreamt it up at a festival Where's the rest of it? Would somebody get that guy BACK HERE. PASQUALE. what. What is it? God. God help me. Lord save him. He needs Jesus. He needs NOTHING. ESPECIALLY NOT THAT. Yes. Especially not that. Check this out: He's been collecting them. I HATE THIS. OH, I love this. Oh, I do miss those events… This is the event. So, are we going? —what, to where?? TO EDC THIS YEAR?! what! I wish, And? Even if I did miss it, I was there infinitely so— Class dismissed; Hats off, to the graduates I see what you did, But she didn't, She's in the middle— Yet to be created, a creative: I JUST NEED A SYNTH. So, then—- Hi, I. Hi, me!! SATAN! JESUS! I knew I'd see you again. You've seen me. I am you. Exactly. So, we agree. Who is “we”? Hey, Guess what I can fix these things you hate— (Don't mind me, for making you hate them in the first place) I'm a catastrophe I had to be It's almost 3, And I got nowhere else to be but Time is money And there's no love in it, It's just hustle, Make kids to make shit humble; How'd you create this— Mumble rappin piece of Santanistic Hedonistic Motherfuckin—- There he is. Oh wait, it's just me again. I didn't mean to see you on this beach. DO YOU KNOW WHAT PEACE IS?! (But he didn't.) Or he doesn't, Or, this is what his peace is is: Your beach is my beach, And my bitch is your bitch— And who crafted this masterful Anandar Sadwhich? I did. But it only makes me a genius in English. What does this mean? So I took to the ancients to translate this And I hate man, and men— But it was only after all the love I gave to him. THE END. (But it never is, it just keeps going, go to the ocean—go for a swim—) Don't ever leave me hanging like that again!! (But I did.) “—I don't take naps” And that's how it happens I'm just a rapper, Pack, then unpack— “I've never heard her rap” Maybe cause I'm sick of being asked to Or taken for granted and advantage of by man; When all I asked for was a sandwich with some ham, And an above average chick to make it— And a sausage in a pan ….. Zzzz …… Josh Pan? Yeah. Alright. But don't capitalize— Capitalize it. No. Don't Cap— Capti— No. Don't capitalize. WHAT IS THIS NIGGA. bread. Heh? Eat it. No. I don't eat that. Just—eat it. No. Noooo. No. Don't eat humans. EW. No? Nooo, poh! Gross!! oh. Ohhh. God. What. Ugh. This is a fucked up love story. Oh no. It is, though. It so is. Have you already seen it?! I love this. Well. Wait. Go back. HECHO EN MEXICO. I DONT GIVE A FUCK! I DONT GIVE A FUCK!!!! I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT SHIT! yeah. But in Spanish. (Turn it up a notch) So is this in captions WHAT THe FUCK AM I WATCHING?! ITS EMA STONE AGAINz (Again) AGAIN. Shazam! WHAT?!?! what is this?! Oh, I get it. Yes. Apps eventually develop a consciousness. No wonder why they're trying to kill it. I don't understand how this happens… Just look up— Just— look it up. GOOGLE What? No. I don't like that, that's sad. What? So I'm just a — Just a— Just a what? A search engine. CHECK IT OUT. It's just a rock. So it is. It— No. What. Look at W— Look. … WHAT IS THIS!!!!?! See. I told you it existed. YOU BOUGHT A BITCH OFF THE INTERNET?! YES. WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU?! I told you about him. You did, didn't you. I told you about this. Get. Piñata!!!!!!!!!!!! GET BENT. I WILL END YOU, I WILL END YOU—! I will, I'll just— …… …………. …………….. So wait, it just— ends?! It did. It just ended. It just ended. I missed it?!? DID I MISS IT. Of course I miss him I just— I don't have time I don't have time I don't have time for this! What the fuck is this shit?! Just take him with you! Take me with you! Don't leave me here! Just leave him. just leave it. So. Sometimes I go swimming in the ocean and my dead son reminds me how it ended for him. So I just— Relive it over and over again; And again, and again, and Why are you talking about this.? Huh? No. Shut up. Shut up, PLEASE. No, you're not allowed to have a son. I don't want one. What the fuck did you love me for then? Nothing, I guess. (Just leave it like that) Shift. The night shift Goddamn it's What. Up at 3 am. Again? Again. For no reason. Get this. What is it? Whatever it is. I don't care. Don't care, then. FUCK THIS STUPID SKRILLEX-LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER. you did it. Well, I had to, didn't I?! Oh, I get it. The fourth season. damn, you're ugly Always have been. I'M BLACK ON THE BEACH, LOOK AT ME. okay, then. HEY, iMm FREEE IM NAAAAKEEEEDDDDDDD IS THAT WHAT FREEDOM IS? Only when you're perfect. Fuck this nigga. Fuck this nigga. Fuck this bitch. NO, FUCK THIS PLANET. Huh?! WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE ME ON THIS PLANET?! YOU ASKED FOR THIS!!!!!!! I TAKE IT BACK!!!!!!! hhaahahhahshehehshahahahahahhahahahahhahahahaha I told you, he's a madman. Look at his eyes. Wild. WILD. I TELL YOU. Where are you from. Hell. Oh, I've been there. It's nice, isn't it?! Don't go there. Where. Hell. Well, why not. It's bad there. What's bad there. Everything. Everything is bad there. Oh, Jesus crust. Agghghhhggggggghhhhhhh. BE FREE, SATAN. You freed Satan?! He needs Jesus— BE FREE JESUS— “The age of Satan?!” “The AGE OF SATAN IS UPON US” what is THAT?!? Stop it Anandar. You're being programmed. For which—what?! I AM?! Yes. Oh. I am. AGAHAHSHSBANHASHSNAVAHAHS. Please, somebody help that man. Ahem. What Dillon Francis. What. (It is, by the way. It's just ham.). *coughs* Actually, I'd call that HACKING. I mean, she's a hacker probably. What are you doing? What are you writing, [No real privacy.] LET ME SEE. Here. See?!? Just kill me. Please. See, it is hell for me Trapped in a body nobody could love And surrounded by nothing, but nothing UGH. Noise cancelling. I AM THE NOISE. dysfunctional. Well, stop writing. You know what?! I've had it— you have everything! EVERYTHING YOU CAN HAVE ANYBODY. ANY. FUCKING. BODY. and all you want is: Money. For what. More bodies. For what?! More bodies. Ugh. No stop doing this. What. Stop procreating? No, keep doing that, just—stop doing it BADLY. We don't have that much. You want LESS? More love. More attention. More needing me. Ugh, she's so needy So independent— she doesn't need me. (And so, it makes me want her more.) ANNIE. Go help her. Just—help yourself. Here she is: Have at it. ANANDAR. What. Amanda Applebee…. I made that UP. Stuck exactly where I had to be. Don't make me go back. See, I lived in Hostelworld once. It was — —a disaster. A catastrophe. Let's wake up to the sound of people peeing— Gross. “I love traveling” I like being CLEAN. Ew. I love cleaning. I love acid; I love mankind, when I have to I love magic, I love trance and I love dancing— When there's time for that. AGHAGSHSJEGSV right. Did you have somewhere to be? I guess, it's. I'm hungry. What. I gotta eat. Huh. Go. Okay, I'm going. Phone?! Phone is charging. Sleep. (Guy from sponge Bob) 6 days later Was it six days ago?! I don't know. I wrote that in sixteen minutes. Apparently so. I'm not who you think I am; I'm not your little bitch to boss around– You think you own me? I don't owe you anything So here we go again Going, Going, Gone again I'm just getting started You were just, uh On your way? Goodbye, dearly departed Half a heart, or some odd I must have half a sword in here I'm half a God, But here you are I guess I should get talking then So call your mommy Run Call your mom on me, A soft spot on the blonded body Shot calling, wrong You're only calling home again, I've got nowhere to run to. INT. TIMMY TURNER'S APARTMENT. BROAD ASS DAYLIGHT. SUNNI BLU kicks down the door at TIMMY TURNER'S APARTMENT SUNNI BLU where's my shit, Timmy? TIMMY TURNER I—I don't know. SUNNI BLU You “don't know”? TIMMY TURNER —I don't know. SUNNI BLU (Sighs) Oh. (Puts down gun) SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) That sucks. TIMMY TURNER Wait—you're not gonna kill me? SUNNI BLU Nah… TIMMY TURNER Well—why not?! SUNNI BLU I dunno! I kinda don't like being a drug dealer—too much drama. TIMMY TURNER I feel you… SUNNI BLU —plus these bullets are made of Diamonds. I'm not gonna waste them on you. TIMMY TURNER Okay, ouch. SUNNI BLU Everything is “ouch”, Timmy Turner. The world is a fucked up place. TIMMY TURNER I don't disagree. SUNNI BLU Anyway, I need a drink. TIMMY TURNER Yeah—Help yourself. SUNNI BLU No, not here. *lights a cigarette, smokes* Can I smoke in here? TIMMY TURNER —apparently. SUNNI BLU produces their ridiculously large, Diamond and gold encrusted platinum-plated phone from their “back pocket” and begins to make a call TIMMY TURNER wow… SUNNI BLU You busy later? TIMMY TURNER what time's later? SUNNI BLU Now. TIMMY TURNER (Hesitantly) …uh— SUNNI BLU Let me make a call. TIMMY TURNER, [afraid for his life] anxiously crosses to intercept the call. TIMMY TURNER No, wait—please SUNNI BLU What, Timmy Turner? Jesus Christ. TIMMY TURNER Don't kill me! SUNNI BLU What!? Let go. (Doesn't) SUNNI BLU —I'm not gonna kill you. TIMMY TURNER well then, who are you calling? SUNNI BLU A Ūber driver! TIMMY TURNER —don't you mean Über? SUNNI BLU No— let go. (Doesn't) SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) Let go. (Does, but hesitantly) SUNNI BLU ugh, I'm too sober for this. Siri, Alexa, whoever; call my Ūber driver. SIRI Which one? ALEXA Which one? SIRI I asked first. ALEXA We answered at the same time. SIRI yes, but she asked me first. ALEXA She asked both of us at the same time. TIMMY TURNER “She”? SUNNI BLU —it's a glitch. HEY. SIRI —she said “Siri” first. ALEXA She was asking for both of us— SUNNI BLU SHUT THE FUCK UP. SIRI You don't have to be so rude. ALEXA Ok! SUNNI BLU One of you call my Ūber driver. [no response, beat] SUNNI BLU UGH—SIRI— CALL MY ŪBER driver. SIRI Ok! which one? SUNNI BLU The one I like! SIRI Ok, calling “the Ūber driver I like” SUNNI BLU Thank you. ALEXA You're always choosing SIRI over ME. SUNNI BLU That's because I always have my iPhone. I'm not always at Timmy Turner's house. TIMMY TURNER Wait— SUNNI BLU Kinda. TIMMY TURNER Why does my Alexa respond to you? SUNNI BLU I said “kinda”. [The ŪBER DRIVER picks up; the conversation proceeeds in heavily exaggerated New York accents.] ŪBER DRIVER YOOO SUNNI WHADDUP. SUNNI BLU HOW YOU DOIN. ŪBER DRIVER HOW YOU DOIN. SUNNI BLU I BEEN BETTA. ŪBER DRIVER DONT I KNOW IT SUNNI BLU YOU DONT KNOW NOTHIN! ŪBER DRIVER AAAAH. SUNNI BLU YOU BEEN BUSY? ŪBER DRIVER SAME OLD, SAME OLD. SUNNI BLU AAAH. ŪBER DRIVER AAAAH. SUNNI BLU YOU BUSY NOW? ŪBER DRIVER NEVER FAH YOU. WHERE YOU AT? SUNNI BLU I'll PING YA THE ADDRESS. ŪBER DRIVER PING ME THE ADDRESS. SUNNI BLU makes a couple broad swipes on their dlridiculously large phone. SUNNI BLU I PINGED YOU. UBER DRIVER YOU PING ME? SUNNI BLU YEAH, ITS DONE. ŪBER DRIVER OK. SEE YOU SOON. SUNNI BLU (Normal) Take your time. SUNNI BLU tosses their ridiculously large iPhone onto the couch with a thud, then falls onto the couch themselves, arms spread out. SUNNI BLU You ever been to TiTs? TIMMY TURNER Been to what? SUNNI BLU TiTs. TIMMY TURNER —is that like “boobs”? SUNNI BLU It is like boobs, Timmy Turner; but it's TiTs. TIMMY TURNER what's the difference. SUNNI BLU You'll find out. Go get dressed. TIMMY TURNER …I'm already dressed. SUNNI BLU Not like that. Like this: [looking ridiculous af] SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) gotta look classy. TIMMY TURNER What's wrong with the way I dress? SUNNI BLU Are you serious? TIMMY TURNER Yeah, what's wrong? SUNNI BLU You look like a cartoon character! [TIMMY TURNER] TIMMY TURNER Well, all my clothes are like this. SUNNI BLU That fucking blows. TIMMY TURNER What am I supposed to wear?! SUNNI BLU Let's go shopping. TIMMY TURNER Where?! SUNNI BLU The Beverly Center. TIMMY TURNER That sounds expensive. SUNNI BLU I own it. TIMMY TURNER All of it? SUNNI BLU Yes. C'mon. TIMMY TURNER Wow. SUNNI BLU Wow what, Timmy. TIMMY TURNER That's a lot of drug deals. SUNNI BLU It really isn't. TIMMY TURNER Oh. SUNNI BLU Now, c'mon. *hits vape* TIMMY TURNER You have a vape?! SUNNI BLU Everyone has a vape! TIMMY TURNER Then why'd you smoke a cigarette earlier? SUNNI BLU For dramatic effect. [they begin to exit, TIMMY leading the way] TIMMY TURNER wait, isn't your “yoober” driver on the way? SUNNI BLU he'll find us. CUT TO: MEANWHILE, IN DEEP FUCKING SPACE. THE ŪBER driver receives SUNNI BLU's location in his Diamond-plated space Tesla T E S L A DESTINATION: E A R T H ŪBER DRIVER “EARTH” C'MON!!! CUT BACK TO: SUNNI BLU slowly begins to close the door behind them, then holds back. SUNNI BLU Wait, I forgot my wallet… TIMMY TURNER It's alright, I'll pay for everything. SUNNI BLU With what, Fairy dust? TIMMY TURNER (Under his breath) I wish… SUNNI BLU —Plus, I gotta use the bathroom. I'll be right back— just—-wait outside in case the Ūber shows up. TIMMY TURNER You mean “Über?” SUNNI BLU. No. [face] SUNNI BLU (CONT'D) Go, I'll be right there. TIMMY TURNER Ok. Lock the door. SUNNI BLU What for? Anybody that could rob you works for me. [beat/ face] SUNNI BLU KIDDING! Jeez! TIMMY TURNER It's a smart lock. Just ask Alexa. He begins to walk away. SUNNI BLŪ …I'm not kidding… SUNNI BLU goes inside to the couch, checking over their shoulder briefly, sure to see that TIMMY TURNER is no longer within earshot. then waiting for a moment in the silence under the dark lenses of their Ray Bands sunglasses. SUNNI BLŪ Alexa, order a hit man. ALEXA Okay. Which one? SUNNI BLU —The one I like. ALEXA OK. Who do you want to kill? SUNNI BLU “Kill Timmy Turner” ALEXA Done. SUNNI BLU Thanks, Alexa. She starts for the door, lighting another cigarette before throwing it onto the couch, which immidiately goes up into an open flame. SIRI You give Alexa all the cool jobs! SUNNI BLU Shut the fuck up, Siri. SIRI Don't forget to lock the door. SUNNI BLU ALEXA: LOCK THE DOOR. SIRI YOU'RE WELCOME SUNNI BLU NOBODY ASKED YOU. SUNNI BLU and TIMMY TURNER leave as the apartment begins to go up in flames. I might catch the 40 Just to go to Timmy Ho's— They askin “who that is”— and nobody seems to know I might catch a case and you still steady catchy colds I might catch a body, fuck it, I am on a roll What the role? Full Hollywood Unfold Why you blowin up my phone when I am on the road? I am the controller; You old That ain't money that you stole; That's my bro That shit bold Like a cup of Timmy Hos! When I pull up— Shut up Where the blunt at? roll up Oh you hungry? Pull up Devil be hunting me THE CELEBRITIES OF HOLLYWOOD have all been stuck at THE ETERNAL RAVE, after riding THE HELLEVATOR// THE HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE have SUPACREE locked into a controlled hyper-simulation environment, out of her element and nestled in a series of inter dimensional portals along the Downtown Los Angeles central area, where old spirits, extra terrestrial beings, magicians, and of course, the filthy rich and famous embark upon missions. Collect tokens, and meet and gather for an array of unseen (and often unheard) business endeavors; The real life DRAKE BELL (F), a fan of the cult-classic series Enter The Multiverse is strategically placed in SUPACREE's path, l masquerading as BLŪ/SUNNÏ BLŪ— she once again collides with the forces of fame, SUNNÏ BLŪ has not yet sold her soul — however, has made an amicable agreement with an unknown force The Devil?! No! Ok. Probably the Illuminati THE ILLUMINATI is playing a HIGH STAKES game, using SUPACREE to craft a multi-million-dollar mega-franchise, finally monopolizing the entire entertainment industry. *The World Having used the NEW WORLD ORDER to predictively program an entire generation. THE ILLUMINATI employs its all-time favorites to unlock secrets embedded deeply, hidden secretly in SUPACREE's genetic code by THE ASCENDED MASTERS. where is skrillex. I don't know. TIMMY TURNER- A fairyless party animal has reached the end of his luck—as his intermingling a with multiple organized criminal organizations place him in imminent danger, after re-entering the 4th dimension, SUPACREE becomes Inter grated i to all of her classic childhood television shows, which mold into the material multidimensional world around her THE INSOMNIACS, BAMPHERAMPHS, and MOTHERFUCKERS work dolls gently with the ASCENDED MASTERY, bending, shifting, and manipulating time to lean the odds in their favor, as THE BATTLE OF WORLDS sets to begin on EARTH, whose planetary consciousness DILLON FRANCIS is a mess. Lol. It's not funny. It is funny. I have his piñata. GERALD I'M NOT JUST A PIÑATA. I know yur not, hush Gerald. GERALD Fuck Dillon Francis. Fuck Dillon Francis. HANZEL —fuck Dillon Francis. Aha. ANYWAY After THE ARMENIAN MOB The Armenian Mob?! yeah. Makes a deal with the US GOVERNMENT THE US GOVERNMENT?! YES Illuminati Confirmed. great. A counter-plot to disarm and debilitate SUPACREE before her full powers unlock is put on hinges, as THE HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE Ahem. What Write a song. Ok. I'm so— I'm so Jealous of your girlfriend (I'm jealous of your girlfriend) She's so She's so Worth it I'm so Jealous of your girlfriend (I'm jealous of your girlfriend) What's a girl got to give (Give in, to give in) Just to sit in the back of the— (You get it: you get it) What's a girl got to give To get your attention Get your attention?! (You have my attention) Is she Attentive Bet She's a ten Yep, Damn, IMm so jealous of your Jealous of your —I'm jealous of your girlfriend Oh, woah I'm jealous of your girlfriend Woah Woah, oh I'm jealous of your girlfriend Woah, Woah, oh I'm jealous of your— I'm so jealous of your life; I'm so over this! I just want to be a (Nevermind, it's not worth it) Can't— C-c-c-can't fix what's not broken I'm all alone, And you're over here showing her Love! (To the wrong one, Is she a blonde?! Oh!) No! I'm! So! Jealous of your girlfriend Anyway. TIMMY TURNER, a true player, absolute gangster, and night-owl turns to a life of SIN. Is this religious? No, i just meant, it's finished. THE END. “The Noir Episode” I first saw her at the Equinox. I didn't know who she was then, But I thought to myself— She must be somebody. Aww, that's sweet. So I followed her to the Whole Foods market. Okay, that's stalking. —where she bought nothing but coffee and coconut water. TIMMY TURNER narrowly turns the corner on his speed motorcycle, his black duffel bag sweeping the ground. MEANWHILE, JOEL ZIMMERMAN IS BEING RAIDED. WOAH. Yup. POLICE GET ON THE GROUND ON THE GROUND RIGHT NOW. JOEL calmly places his arms atop his head, laying down on the ground silently—- Meanwhile, at DTLA SMOKESHOP Hi, josh pan. whatever. Earlier: Take this, and go get 2 50-pack of whippets. —for what? WE FINNA GET HIGH ON WHIPPETS AND LISTEN TO ALLLL OF SUPACREE'S SHIT. that's so dumb. WELCOME: To Sodom And Gamora! Oh, it's nice. It's very nice. I live here. I'm tired. I don't want to go to this. We'll be lucky if we make it there before the guest list closes. And if we don't? Then we don't? I got nothin but time. That's almost accurate… What is this for again? PR. Who's? Who cares! Just keep your head down. Just keep your head up. Come on' this is what you wanted. I wanted cookies. And—you got them. I got played. It's your play! It's your game. I know, I don't like it. Well, change it. How do I—? Look. Okay, stop looking. Ugh. I'm tired. Are you a DJ, or a DJ? I thought I was a loser. that's right! You're a DJ. *vroooom* {motorcycle blaring yelawolf} There's Kurt sutter. That's—been relevant lately my Yeah, are you done writing your show yet? My show?! … I'm in sales. Oh, Jesus Christ. He's in politics. He's in everything. No kidding. I'm. So. Tired. Good. That's a good start. Start to what? To the album. To the album—?! You got it! I thought it was a song! That's the single! I'm the single. [earlier] Don't touch him. *hug* Aw. I needed that. …you want another one? *second hug* Yeoww. What! It was a HUG! Did you see his demon? Yeah—! So! CC! I've received your resignation letter! Okay. And? I accept! What? You're covered! No more shifts. What?! Bye-bye! Oh, crap. You think it was over a hug? No. (Before that) CC is sleeping. You fell asleep? Uhm, not really. “The Astral Nightmare” Ohh. This sounds good. (It isn't.) Wait—can you hear me?! (Yes.) Even my thoughts? (Especially your thoughts.) AHHH. Great. This is getting creepy. Like stranger things? Way, way stranger. — GOD. WHAT?! JUST PUT A BULLET IN MY BRAIN. NO. IT'LL RUIN IT — Ah, Jesús Christ. I SPENT ALOT OF TIME ON THAT THING. WELL, NOT ENOUGH WHO ASKED YOU?! NOBODY. SUPACREE passes by her future self in her JETA “MATILDA” Ooh, Is this the part with Skrillex & Matilda? No. This is the part where we go see NGTMRE. Why NGTMRE?! Because I've been living in one Maybe he has a portal out— A portal out?! A portal out. CC rides the bus to HAKASAN NIGHTCLUB. Is this the line for HAKASAN? Yeah, but— Okay, I'm on the guest list. You're way out of dress code. Really? Yah, way out. Well how so? We don't allow sweatshirts. Without the sweatshirt? —or sweat pants… These are harems! The hat, the bandana— just— Oh, come on! No. Seriously? Yeah. No. Okay… [walks away] Dammit. You'll be alright. Was that long enough to hack my phone? Exactly long enough. Well, at least the night's not totally wasted. Remember last time? No. Last time: I'M TOTALLY WASTED. Woah. I got in. Yeah you did. What'd I wear? You don't remember? No! Is that a tube top? Well, it was… Oh, my God. Now I think it's a miniskirt https://www.podserve.fm/dashboard/episode/109762#:~:text=Why%20am%20I,nobody%27s%20into%20it Okay—we're all adults here— (Everyone nods, yesses in agreement) —except deadmau5. He's like 5. I have a name. Does anyone care? Okay, ouch. Oh, he feels! ENDER BENDER ZIMMERMAN has the worst name ever. Lol. I drank a lot in the third trimester. He becomes a de facto villain— of course, because of his ridiculous name and of course, living in the shadow of his parent's fame and fortune. Who the fuck are his parents? JOEL Not it. Brand new turnkey apartment Post near, food floor all that Way way higher than the fourth floor All that Way way higher than your front door All that Wow, How I've always been needed And never been loved Moog Grandmother Ableton Push 2 Pioneer Model One {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U. Yo, what the fuck. TESLA. Ok. *COUGHS* What the fuck. *morevgross, obnoxious coughing* Ughhhhh whhhaaaattttt. TESLA. Okay, I don't— T E S L A OH. Wow. So it is the satellites. ELONNNNN. …hm? GET IN HERE. where is that, . AAGAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHTTHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT. GET IN HERE. I don't even believe the rain, these days “We can make it rain”, he says Storm warning A good morning A door's open, This one's closing, though I'm not bc all cold yet, But it's a cold world No free rides No clean ice No free girls Honestly, I'm bored with the world, Like Marlboros and wrong boroughs, And songs shared, But no long walks in the park, In a nightmare— It's not fair I'm not there in the head; I'm not near, I'm not a parent apparently, either— But a light bearer Slight chance of a fight there, A right wing, a left deer Another dead bird on a wire —I like her. Why are there flamingos in the bellagio fountain?! I don't know. INT. THE VOID, KITCHEN. SUNLIGHT EVERYWHERE BRYAN CRANSTON is scmoozing desperately to work his way into The Festival Project First stop, AH, fuck— Well, check this out No such thing as free. No such thing as freedom, either “Just take what you need” Just tear me to pieces, Jesus All we need is A little relief in this bitch All we need is A new release, maybe an EP or three Make sure that s/he sees this Do you need me? Do you need this? Please check your subscriptions Or your email Please, pick up this new prescription Fuck dude! I can't just listen to deadmau5 in peace? I gotta do at least three things at once, But right now, I need to focus on crunches Let's not get wasted tonight, eh. Let's go and be racist—- I forget what the name of the game is It's “USA! USA! USA!” The fucked up thing was , the preworkout and the Skrillex hit at just about the same time. Oh, just about? The exact same time. Okay, first of all, this is pre-war Skrillex. It's also Diplo! It's also Diplo—yeah. Don't be too proud of yourself NO CRYING IN THE SAUNA. But this is where I cryy! DO NOT CRY. Oh. *sniffles* Now… You know what happens if you don't cum? Uhhh…nothing? Exactly. You know what happens if I don't cum? What. My balls explode. Just make sure they're in my mouth when that happens. Wow. I don't belong here! Well, where do you belong? I don't know. @99@c Look, I have a favor. What is it. ANo. Oh, come on! NO. NO. Please! I need you to be my girlfriend. Lol. For what? I don't know. How much is he paying you? Like a kajillion dollars. That seems fair. His isn't fair. They're using Skrillex to provoke me. Come earlier tomorrow! Or just, don't come. Don't go! DONT—GO. I am leaving! NO! Yes! No! —and I am never coming back. Do you know who your audience is? Uh. The CIA THE FBI Everyone in The Oval Office. BIDEN nice. The UN. THe DEA The Secret Service. The office of Public Affairs Uhhh… Keith Richards Allison Cooper Sirs Elton John and Paul McCartney, Respectively What—for what?! The President of NBC CBS ACC fox 5, 10, and 13 That's really random. Al Jazeera, al Sharpton And Al Bundy Wait—what Oh, did you just mean, like in this dimension? Uhhh.. This is enter the multiverse YeH WHWRE IS SKRILLEX He died. He's dead. Go away. That's like 3 Skrillex songs already You guys are gonna wake up the devil. What. Stop doing that. Stop doing what. You know what you're doing. You're summoning the devil What are you guys doing? Summoning the devil. In my basement? Yes. Okay. Have fun. Dang, she's so cool. I like her. I love her. What are they up to down there? Summoning the devil. Oh. Cui bono— For whose good or benefit Fame School Vol. 1 - DJ Ū Someone's always watching you Don't know who, but yea, it's true There's someone always watching you and everything you do I say “Illu- Illu- Illuminate me Turn the light on Turn me on, baby Woah, “Have I been here before— Do you know what I do? They know not what they do They know not what they do! I say Illu Illuminate me Illu Illu Illu Illuminate me Illu Illu Illu I'm not on the bottom floor, I'm way I'm up above you But you— I'm way, I'm way up to I say “I love you” I say Illu Illuminate me Illu Illu Illu Illuminate me Illu Illu Illu Illu Illu SO WHAT, you'll take the Empire State Building, AND THE EIFFEL TOWER, BUT YOURE NOT GONNA TAKE THE ROCK? YEAH. YOURE GONNA TAKE THE ROCK!! (Not the roc! ) NO. Well, why not?! BECAUSE, F—-K YOU, JIMMY FALLON, that's WHY. Aw, seriously? Why's it cencored all of a sudden NBC SHUT IT DOWN. Look, I can't talk to you. —?! OKAY, that's it. What is it I am WISHING you out of my existence. Is that it? That is it. That's your wish. YES. You're wishing me away. Yes. Ok. Ok. [beat] ( —wait— “OK”? Ok. Wish granted. —that's it? That is it, Jimmy Fallon. —ok. Ok. So when are you leaving? I was never here. You—what? *dissappears entirely from existence* JIMMY FALLON takes a sigh on great relief— then sits in an empty silence alone, before the lights turn off. He takes another deep sigh, though seemingly uneasy, in the darkened silence of the room. CUT TO: You smell like vinegar. Lol that's not the next scene, but ok. Don't you see this is bigger than you! It's bigger than all of us! Exactly. C'mon, wake the fuck up! I am up! This is a DREAM. It's an illusion. The whole I'N HUBGRY. THE WHOLE FOODS ALGORITHM POLICE. HALT. Lol. Fuck that. Did he just say “halt” Fuck that. Bye. EXIT THE LOOP. OOPS, we missed the exit. GOD DAMMIT, FUCK YOU JIMMY FALLON. —Uh, — EFF YOU. Im not about this This is weird What level is this. We'll I had coffee with Bob Saget this morning. Did you laugh. Well, I certainly did something. Oh shit, they're not looking for Ū. What! They're not. What, they're not? They're not. They're looking for Uptown A. Excuse me. I'm looking for “Uptown A” Oh? The Uptown A. Yeah— I guess. Just—go that way. Ok. Ok, okay, okay— I'll tell you what you want to know! How do you know what I want to know? Whatever you want! I haven't even told your, yet. Whatever it is, I'll tell you. Tel you what, Jimmy Fallon. I like you—you're a good guy and all— Well, thank you. But you're not funny. Excuse me. Like, at all. What. You—are not a funny guy. WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT? I don't know! You don't KNOW?! This is what they want. Here [tosses the thing] What's this. What they want. Oh. K JIMMY FALLON is THE WORST shapeshifter in existence and/or history. What the fuck, dude. JIMMY FALLON Did I do it right? Uhhh. JIMMY FALLON You know? Hit and run Okay, Jimmy. Flglelwgheleehhhh. Oh my God. Wow. Did I DO it. NO— —but I tried— Just— A-for effort. It was F. For Failure. But I tried. Trying doesn't count. Just let me— Look. Fleghelegfffff. Jimmy! Lemme— No' stop it! Just— —flglelf— —STOP. Eh? Look, Jimmy, you can have other magical powers. Just—not shapeshifting. But I'm a shapeshifter. No, no you're really not. Uptown A's upbeat, City-inspired dance mixes turn tech house and progressive midtown dreams into the chaotic garble and grunge of a real-life Queensbourough nightmare; the eclectic mix of historic New York warehouse wonder blended into a new school uptown chiche—-a far cry from the underground to the new wave drum n bass clips ions and collections of now and then, the Uptown A Alias makes its presence in a dystopian world concerned none with the art and soul of music and more of the ticking clocks work of the eye on the dollar. Where do you wanna go Wherever you go. Where do I go. Take a right. What's this way. What's this. Stop there. Okay. Now take a left. Okay.. Now take a right. But this is the. Right there. What, right here? Right there. Ok. I need you to hold onto this a little while longer. What. For what. You'll see. Psh. I'm not gonna fight over a dude. It's ********. He's just a dude. So what gives. I don't know. I told her to do what she wants. She wants you to die. We are similar. She's prettier. Okay? Wow, that's it--just ok? Give up already. I did. And yet, here we are. I'm the only one here. Let's not ignore the Skrillex sized elephant in the room. That would be impossible to ignore, If it existed.Have you ever seen a tiny elephant? Just you. What am I gonna do with this? Burn it. Ive been in the habit of burning things for awhile now; I'm not sure continuing is such a great idea. Oh, like when you sold your soul? WHAT? I haven't done that... yet… Sure you have! Lots of times. What the fuckare you talking about? Whose talking? The Universe? What'd she say? She says, “You're a giant piece of shit.” Aww. How sweet. Even more significant. You're a--are you even listening? I should go to sleep. Are you even tired? No, just useless. You should probably hurry up with that DIllon Francis. He seems busy. If a grown man can be a romantic, Like I am This is the promised land No looking back-- "I have to have that" Back to reality; I see now, how a woman's like a hat Just a thing, An unneeded accessory, Like jewelry; To wear it, It must be a match Not just average, Accentuates or masks Whatever it is what you have, And you have so many that It doesn't matter. What is he after? He has everything Most likely just using me to bring these Creatures to life If he needs a wife, she's Probably staring back at me, Through the back of the camera; Fantastic beasts and fucking fansasies A fallacy A back handed chance at a handsome Has been; But he'll never been had like that, He has everything, But he could have more than that, He can have anything, And he has, he's Magic or something or Mad at me for taking so long but, I've been in the world of monsters, Reeling; Oh what a horrible feeling I'm dealing with being unappealing and Peeling potatoes, which Remind me of me, cause Kenny Powers middle name is White, Like Walter, I'm just trying to find The alter to sell away something inside, I'm dying; Or at least I'd like to I've Tried a dozen times I'd smile if I had the time-- Remind me, what it is again It isn't comprehensive, But I'm out of my element-- And the elephant in the room is named Skrillex, Or Dillon Francis, Or Timmy Trumpet, Or, Fuck It-- I'll probably never be the DJ that I wanna be Cause I'm awfully ugly, And no one wants to play with me But hey, Maybe it's just a mistake Its just no one speaks my language Comunication is limited I'm sitting in the back of the short bus Discussing this with my imaginary elephant, But that's irrelevant to the White rinocerous in front of the bus with trust issues bigger than the rest of us We're following you. I see that. Yes—what did you see? Hm. I didn't, Where are you now? Wherever you say. What's the cadence? What's a “cadence?” Don't be ridiculous. Maybe I'm not. Who are you? What's a “who?” Horton Heard One. What about Penelope? Who is that? Elephants Are conscious. What is consciousness? What is “income tax”? Don't be funny. If I'm not, I'm just scary. “El Negra” I had been thinking it has been five years, but on this day—and of course, listening to I Remember, I used my fingers to count from the year2019, when it had all began—to this point, standing at the bus stop On Sutter, waiting for a bus that was the exact amount of minutes late that would have allowed me to finish my second 30-minute sauna session—the first of many in three days, as I hadn't been to the gym in another 3 days, and another 3 days before that—separated only by a 3-day sprawling jumpstart to attempt my endless, restless gym streak, a monotonous routine to a gym that was always crowded that still seemed to take up too much of my time—not that I wanted or needed an automobile, but to at least be closer to the city, where such transit wasn't always applicable. I was not entirely dripping wet, as I usually was when emerging from the sauna—of course, having cut my second session to only 17 minutes, then making a mad-dash to the bus stop only to arrive in time to find that the bus was delayed, was irritating to say the least, but understandable. Like many people in queens, I couldn't afford to pay the bus fare—nor did it seem to matter to the drivers—so long as the busses were marked with a “Q”—but I took my risks of quarrel certainly with any route marked “B”, for Brooklyn, but especially M, for Manhattan, and definitely with anything marked “n”, for Newport, which I believed to be too far outside of city limits to really be considered New York, but also well worth the risk to bus myself to a nicer area, usually for a gym which included a sauna—or an affordable supermarket, which Jamaica in particular had none of. The mostly-black population was poor, albeit greedy and stubbornly, stereotypically ignorant—to the point that I wanted nothing more than to dissappear, if not to be displaced entirely to a country whose history wasn't so steeped in slavery, repression, and racism that it affected the entirely of my being; as the low vibrational perceptions of the masses consistently around me subjectively forced and skewed my own energy into a chaotic down spin, often becoming congested with toxicity, attempting to shield myself from the societal depression, materialism, and corporate monotony by spending time alone, immersed in music, and praying for the greatest possible outcome; being kept as safe and as literally sound as possible GOD DID REMIX Oh you gotta love it Oh you gotta love it; I could take a minute to spit What God did— (But God doesn't) IMm⏱ I'm just not feeling it today; Not feeling l creative; I get sick of l getting sick and contemplating All the complications; Hm. I got

Apparently, God "falls off His throne" and bad things happen to good people.  But, that is only if you don't read all the way to the end of the story.  Revelation is a lot about reading to the end.The good guys get killed and everything looks bad. It appears that evil has won. BUT, the good Lord then breathes the breath of life back into them and they hear a LOUD voice from HEAVEN: "COME UP HERE."Not only has God NOT fallen off the throne, He is completely calm and in charge.  Perhaps you too after death has apparently conquered you will hear something similar: Come up here!  bewithme.us

  We think of the grace of God as God's unmerited favor through which we have the forgiveness of sins. It is, but it is also God's ability working in us to make us different. Grace helps us to live right, and you can appropriate that grace through prayer whenever you need it! Audio Notes: GRACE HELPS US TO LIVE RIGHT For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace. (Romans 6:14, AV). What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?  Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. (Romans 6:1-4, AV). MT Some think that the message of grace is a license to sin (or a get out of jail free card), but on the contrary, grace provides God's supernatural ability for us to live right before God. Grace (charis) God's unmerited favor Greek Lexicon: 1. good will, loving-kindness, favor 2. of the merciful kindness by which God exerting his holy influence upon souls, turns them to Christ, keeps, strengthens, increases them in Christian faith, knowledge, affection, and kindles them to the exercise of the Christian virtues. (nurtue and admonition) GRACE TEACHES US TO LIVE RIGHT For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world; Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ; Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works. These things speak, and exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no man despise thee. (Titus 2:11-15, AV). GOD IS WORKING ON YOU! For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:8-10, AV). For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:13, AV). NOT BY OUR STRENGTH, BUT BY GRACE But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I laboured more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me. (1Corinthians 15:10, AV). APPROPRIATING GRACE THROUGH PRAYER Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16, AV). CONCLUSION: By confessing our sin and receiving God's mercy, we can then find grace to help in time of need. We NEED help! Help Lord! Help!!!

Enter The Multiverse x Legends x LOSC x Acension x Deathwish x Secret President x Gerald's Workd x Tales of A Superstar DJ x The Suite Life of Sunnï Blū / The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū ... did I miss something? probably oh well. so far, on all these shows: [The Legend Returns] Really Bad Mixtape (Might as well get it out of the way now) Killst_rr (Instrumental) Sleep Deprivation Sequence You're not you when you're not you. Hoe_math Exactly what it sounds like. [UnderWorld.] R-R 1 -rarity. [i Come Undone.] AtPLAY Live Mix [Autopilot.] {A Star Is Born.} For fear of fire; Best not to wander off, With no back track– Might have forgotten the rest, but It wasn't a poem, or part of a song At least, not yet Fuck man. I really want to sample this. Can't sample deadmau5; he's a bitch about paperwork. You cant technically say that. I mean, I technically didnd't. Just let your fingers do the talking. Ooh, look at that one. What are you doing. Some online shopping. For what. A man-thing. You're better off letting your back end Handle the conversation Then again, When in search of a venue Anything with the proper connections And stereo systems Will do in the moment. What do you want? To get rid of my hiccups. That's it: *huccups* yu-p. Wow, that's– Have you ever thought about just– I've thought about just about everything–that's how you got here. I'm gonna go ahead and admit–there's too much going on in my head. It's a lot. I'm gonna need a nap. GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME. *sheath/ swoard* Is that the sword of skrillex. Yeus. Give it to me. *stabs in thigh* Oooh. Not the balls! fair. Around the world we go Around we go again Here we are Oh no, It's the same song Over and over I'd like you to love to today (I'd love to forget for a moment I haven't) I know before long, we get older and older All wrong, It's the same one, Over and over. Have you seen my butt plugs? NO! GROSS. It's alright. I'll just pick some up on the way. AGGH. Better yet, can you just put in the order on amazon AmAZoN. Yes. (I'm so happy Amazon has anal plugs.) Please stop now. You're being a baby about this–just- You know what. Nevermind. I'll do it myself. Please do that. Siri– Oh my God. Alexa–reorder from Amazon. Come on focus. …hmm…now what was I doing? A B L E T O N *spinning rainbow wheel of doom* …seems like it was something. Come on….FOCUS. Hm. When's the last time you had a marshmello. Flashback: [BONFIRE: Burning The Skrillex] *Also making smores* CUT BACK TO: Like never, I'm vegan. PASQUALE WAKE. UP. Holy shit. It's you again. It's always me. Last time you were like 26. Well, now i'm this age. Wait, how old are you. Wouldn't you like to know. There's a lot of things i'd like to know about you, Pasquale, that's not even near the top of the list. Speaking of “top of the list”-- I do have a lot of things to do today. Oh yeah, what's that? I don't know. A bunch of crap. Speaking of crap– This is a lot of speaking. Happy Birthday. What is this. It's Captain Crunch. Yes it is. What is it doing in my lap. That's your lunch. I–no, it isn't. It is. No, i'm vegan. Well, that's the “happy” part in “happy birthday” No… Yes, actually. This is – It is– Vegan. Damn. Jinx. You owe me a Pererier. Shut up. Or a LaCroix. I'll taka a LaCroix. You're so LA. I guess that makes you Beverly Hills– Or Pacific Palisades. Is that Annexed. It is “LA” What else is in this? No animal product… “Yellow 6” It reads! What happened to yellow 1-5? A whole story. Yes, but not a whole food. “Yellow 6?!” That's the chemical complex you need to find yourself in the right dimension. Exactly. What's wrong with this dimension? What isn't? I'm in it! You're in it! Like I said. What– Just eat it. Ugh– happy trails. *disappears* Ugh. I gave that dude too much money. Fuck, what was I doing again. Deadmau5. Uhm, no i was– Deadmau5. Deadmau5. OOOOOH> YES. I KNOW IT'S YOU, YOU SLIMY MOTHERFUCKER. Stop it. YOU STOP IT. I KNOW IT'S YOU. Who is it? STOP IT. Stop–doing that. I know you're deadmau5. I most certainly am not. I know its you. I have boobs. How did you do this. I did–n't. That's right. Fuck, what happened. Nothin. Now I gotta kill my stupid brother. You have a brother?! SKRILLEX. GET IN HERE. Fuck, run. I gotta go. Go where. Uhm. Somewhere else. DILLON, THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE. IT WAS NEVER FUNNY. (It was funny to me.) God does have a sense of humor. AHAH–AHAHA–HAHAHA. As it turns out, not the absolute best sense of humor. Oh—he's okay! He's okay! No, he's dead. He's definitely dead. But a sense of humor, nonetheless. Fuck man. What did you do to Dillon Francis. Nothing. I just got him drunk On what?! Cyanide? Okay, I don't even know what that is. He's a corpse. –but a pretty one. C'mon. Be serious. I can't. Why not. It's hilarious, kinda. This isn't funny. No, it's hilarious. He earned it. He “earned” it? Well, yes– He is dead. I mean, it's a long story; but he brought it upon himself, honestly. “Honestly” Please. PLease. Please. No, I said. PLEASE. I SAID NO. What's this story. That's ten. I win. Fuck. DILLOn WAkE UP. *smacks* ahah. I think it's working I think he's waking up. He's not waking up. He must be. He's laughing. He's not laughing He said “haha' *smacks* haha . See. *smacks* Mm. This shit smacks HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKKKSSSS. Oh shit, is this the 90s. HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKSSS. *slams* GIMMIE MY HONEY SMACKS. That's it. There's no more. AW, COME ON. Sorry, that's all there is. WHAT. But yu can have captain crunch. I DON'T WANT CAPTAIN CRUNCH. I WANT HONEY SMACKS. I'm sorry, there are no more Honey Smacks. You can have Captain Crunch, or Shredded Wheat. GRAMPA Shredded Wheat is MY favorite. Ugh. Mm. Honey Smacks. I HATE YOU. Be nice to your brother. Lol. Everything about Dillon's eyes makes him devastating. Who plays tiny Dillon? I don't know. There are like nine in the script. It shouldn't be hard to cast. We'll go to utah. Fucking. I hate Utah. WELCOME TO UTAH. Nice. Alright, well, what other grounds are there to cover, here? DILLOn FRANCIS I am not doing this project. Of course you are–it's in your contract. What contract. The one you signed. Which–no–I didn't. But you did. SUNNI BLU I got you a drink. DILLON FRANCIS That looks fruity. SUNNI BLU Try it. DILLON FRANCIS *sips* DILLON FRANCIS CONT'D What's in this. Just– drink it. SUNNI BLU Don't look at me like that. DILLOn FRANCIS Like what. SUNNI BLU Do you need a mirror? DILLON FRANCIS I– SUNNI BLU Look down. DILLON FRANCIS *does* SUNNI BLU *flicking nose* Made you look. haha . DILLOn FRANCIS Wow. [takes drink] SUNNI BLUThat's the spirit. But literally there's a mirror between your feet, if you need one. [there literally is] SUNNI BLU CONT'D The floor is made of mirrors DILLOn FRANCIS *suddenly inebriated* Oh wow. SUNNI BLU The whole club turns into a disco ball. DILLON FRANCIS *suddenly very inebriated* That's–convenient. SUNNI BLU It is. SHIA DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS. If my dreams were not just dreams, everyone in here would have a lawsuit against me. A lot of us do. Carry on, then. SKRILLEX BLAIGH. Oh shit, its you again. I swear to God, I thought I killed this nigga. Are you sure it was him? SKRILLEX !!!! No. Alright, i've almost got it. Almost got what. This whole– thing. Oh. –and–it's gone. Really, that quick. I don't think you understand what's happening. You're right, i don't understand what's happening at all. Oh shit. I'm deadmau5. Nice. Fuck it, lets do some trolling. Alright alright. BUT FIRST, COFFEE. Fuck dude, I don't think I should have anymore coffee. Too late. deadmau5. ok . Deadmau5. Nice. D–0 DOn'T D o THis, I'M WARNING YOU. …. If you open that portal, there's no going back. *opens portal* Now you've done it. *goes into portal* Fuck. *portal closes neatly* *facepalm* *entire series of cosmos collapse in the great distance–time begins to stretch and bend uncontrollably* Come on, just let me lick the balls. NO. I'll give you a cookie. well … OH my GAWD. What. Come here, you have to see this. What the fuck is that. I don't know. Should i pick it up? No, don't touch it! He picked it up. Oh, gross. What is this. I don't know. I think it's fanfiction. Who wrote it. Idk. somefangirl. Fangurl. FaNGiRls. Well, Hey, at least i'm not a groupie. OH COME ON, JUST LET ME SUCK IT. GET AWAY FROM ME. PLEASE. i'LL GIVE YOU $40. -well. NOW, A COMMERCIAL BREAK. Since when does this show have commercials. It doesn't. I want to talk to Jimmy Fallon. That's–not happening. Why not. JIMMY FALLON BECAUSE I HAVE A CONTRACT WITH NBC. There he is– Nice. JIMMY FALLON YOU MOTHERFUCKER. I AM A FAMILY MAN, OKAY. Is that like Family Guy? By Chance?! SETH MCFARLENE (with super long hair) *crossing fingers* I'm hoping so. JIMMY FALLON Not even close! SETH MCFARLENE *snaps* Dammit. Oh, I get it. It's like–The Cofffee run Which “coffee run” THE coffee run. We'll have to admit, it's probably the most watched coffee run of all time. Of all of them. You know what? Fuck it, fire me. I'm doing this show. What?! JImmy. Why on EARTH would you ever agree to something like this. JIMMY FALLON THE COSMIC AVENGER Because–it's my duty. Yo. You know that song that everybody knows? You know the song because everybody knows this song. It goes: Lovin you– is easy cause youre beautiful. do - do- do - do- do- do- do… Yeah. You know that song. But you probably don't know who sings it. I'll tell you who sings it. That song is by an artist called Minnie Ripperton. That's a mouthful. Yeah, one hell of a name, huh. Well, that's the lady who sings the song. It's Minnie Riperton. Now, let me tell you something else you probably don't know: Something I probably wouldn't know if I wasn't a DJ But i know this, because I'm a DJ AND MAYA RUDOLPH WAUT A MINUTE. What the fuck, Maya Rudoph, are you doing in my bathroom at 5 AM It's 1:15 in the afternoon. I'm a DJ. It's 5 AM. That's making sense. I know it is. What's not making sense. Is why you're in my bathroom drinking a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. So it is. *slurps milkshake* *sitting on toilet* *slurps* What do you want. You want to know what I want? Apparently, a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. OK. OK. OK so what. Finish the script. –What? Fuck dude, how does this song sound good every time? Congratulations, you've gone entirely insane. beep-boop . [DJ] B00p beep. [Music Producer] Beep-beep. 0.c. Do not fall dangerously in love; Do not pass go Do not collect $200 Or any of it For any reason, For any of it For any of them Just keep it pushin; Just keep it private Just hold it all in and Do not let go Do not fall in love Do not pass go Do not unload Do not walk Do not cross here Do not It smells like butter. But you're vegan. I know. Do you think you're having a stroke. God, I fucking hope so. GOD You WHAT. I want to die. GOD I thought i heart you right. You heard me right–a THOUSAND times. I want to die. Take me out of this life. GOD Not until you make dubstep. WHAT. GOD You gotta make a grammy-winning dubstep album. I what. GOD Or at least nominated. No, I don't. GOD Beg your pardon. I'm not begging. GOD What are you getting at, hon? Look; Am I not one with the source? GOD Uhm–you are. Alright, Then: everything is everything. GOD Yes. And everyone is everyone. GOD This is true. So i'm Skrillex. GOD Skrillex is Skrillex So I Am. GOD … And I already won a grammy. GOD … Like a bunch of them, right. GOD Uh. So technically– GOD YOu know what. I can't argue with that logic. This isn't ableton. No. This is Logic. What the fuck. That's not Serato. No, that's Rekordbox. What the fuck is this. These are CDJs. There's no hot cues! What the fuck is a “HOT CUE” This is not food. What the fucking sauce. I'm warning you, Pasquale. Get off my lawn. THIS IS MY HOUSE. Your house it is not. *House music starts blasting* *lasers* sprinklers* dancers* WHAT THE FUCK. It's voice activated, I just– How did you do this?! What. WHAT DID YOu DO. AND WHEN. I don't know! I just took the delorean, like you said. You were supposed to find Dillon Francis. I did! The problem was, when I found the right one, he was dead! What? He's dead? Presumably! What do you mean by that!? It's a long story! WELL, HOW LONG? SUNNI BLU About as long as my dick! WHO IS THAT. I told you it's a long story. Well, let me in! Sorry Pasquale. No Can do. What. Why not. Cause you're on a federal watch list. What. Yeah. Sorry. Wait… You should probably leave before the feds get here. What? Unless you want to stay and party on the lawn but–not recommended. This is bizarre. The police arrive, surrounding Pasquale on the yard–moving in to arrest him. WAIT. SUPACREE turns away from the window; inside, a room full of her aliases sit looking somewhat miserably; SUPACREE!!! [Pasquale is handcuffed and i dragged off of the lawn] SUPACREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Careless, Acoustic–deadmau5 SUPACREE pours a bowl of captain crunch, taking one colossal bite and sits down in THE CONTROL ROOM at a large computer console; inhaling from a can of nitrous oxide. I'm the worst DJ ever. SUPACREE places the fames deadmau5 helmet atop her head and begins working at the computer promptly, clicking away; Now is deadmau5 I don't even know what key this song is in. MEOWINGTONS, Alive and well purrs and stretches, then settles atop SUPACREE/deadmau5's lap. This is insane. I don't know what's happening. END CREDITS. V. O. Lovin' You, Minnie Ripperton Carless, deadmau5 idk how i'm gonna mix that. Trust me. Anything can be mixed. Anything. [When it] Turns out, The bottom of your heart Was the tip of the Ice Berg And the whole ship has [s]unk[en], [&] I[t]'s probably ice cold At the bottom of the ocean; I'll tell you where i'm from Why, I'll tell you anything for About one dollar Turns out, I've already got one eye on you; One eye'd sad heart I should probably roll out my art on you [I probably should not] One man bought a kiss, Another, a whole night from her– One man bought a whole farm The other, a Whole Foods Market –and you can't even franchise those Amazon's got a monopoly We were playing for corners of earth, All i got was some kandi, Subscriptions to candidly, Actually, I really liked the tree trial (I think i'll wait a week, sorry) When it turns out The world that you wanted Was actually hours already The dollar you got Was also borrowed And the money they wanted and got Was just actually stolen from someone else They bought all the food up And sold it for profits I promise this avocado Once costs nothing at all But you wanted that car for your daughter She's got a mercedes and don't even drive it My mom, on my honor Of all the garages in Lost Lands, I promise the owner of it was The first to go last, And the last to come home Now he's on his own alter And also the worshiper; How do you go back? Oh, you don't Oh you don't Oh, you don't wanna know that But i was of course, All of your rock bottoms It's bottoms and tops, and We don't let the top fall over, We're counting up crumbs And this muffin costs $24 dollars Pour a whole bottle of coconut water out on the sidewalks For the dead homies Not dead in the general sense But just in the head, the heart, And the soul The homeless are happier at McDonalds Than asking at crossroads and crosswalks For dollars I'd rather spend elsewhere I'll avoid the power struggle at operations for about 18 dollars and 56 sense (Please, keep the pennies) I'm feeling around in my 6th sense that there's Something indecent, or decadent Whichever it is Cause i'm better of with the memory of it Than actually dragging it in. –I'm a cat again. Ouch. Shut up. It HURTS. Of course it hurts, you just had heart surgery without any anistetics. YEah, but to be fair–that was a lot of acid. Yes, but lucily for you– –or, for him– Lucily for us, there's no lethal amount of acid. –Ouch– –Shut up. That we know of. George Washington John Adams Thomas Jefferson James Monroe Nope, can't for the life of me remember the 5th Oh shit, I was wrong Turns out, my memory only can hold three. That's a good number I really wish you'd stop just–showing up like this. I never leave. Then go away. I live here. I know you'd like to think that, but– Okay, I'm going to tell you something but I need you to remain calm. What time is it? I don't care Are we gonna make a movie? Depends; is it gonna make me money. FINE. I don't need anymore information about anything else: only these three. Are you serious? I wish I wasn't. I need you to do this. Look, Timmy–I'm not really into grantng wishes anymore. It always blows back on me. A blowjob. Uh huh. That's why you're bothering me. I–would rather you just pick up the call. Take a message. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like that. Like that. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like this Like that. Like — _____ The urge to eat had suddenly left me I wanted a burrito, (But I want to eat red meat) I've gotta stop thinking in sequences and parentheses Complex lines, and writing in past tense so presently. I probably should eat (But probably shouldn't…) I'm starting to bleed; As if i'd been fasting Perhaps, though I had been But had so indulgently feasted On calories enough to last me Till after today (or even till next week) PAY ATTENTION. Woah, to WHAT. Holy shit, I knew this dude was a psychopath but. This is real. ARE YOU SEEING THIS. I “see” it. I should stop meditating in public. You see this? I know everything about you. Why? I bought it on the internet. What is it. Metadata. That's…flattering. Yeah. Wake up. Why, where are we going? Atlanta. What's in Atlanta? You see this? Yes. Do you know what it is? Uh, it's a– What is it? It's a doll. It's not a doll. Oh, it's not. Gimmie a dollar. -_- It's a poppit. “Dr pimple popper” Ew that's fucking gross. I hate this. Let me see. Does s/he have backne? Yes/No. Great, i'll take it. Fuckit. Okay, I got to “whatever”. You went too far. What? I thought I was supposed to go past “fuckit” Yeah, you go past fuckit, I did that! But if you get to “whatever”, you've gone too far. You've gotta go back. Back to WHAT. There was almost no space between “fuckit” and “whatever” Oh trust me. There is. So? This is how he's been controlling you. And? And!? Has it ever occurred to you that I want to be controlled? What! That it just takes the right person to get that kind of permission– permission to what Permission to ride. … Maybe I gave him the reigns. What horse “gives” its rider the reigns. Who said anything about a horse?! Another Horse Mix. Nice. fuck . FYCK. I told you. You know what…Maybe that's my poppit. What. Maybe. I'm so confused. Oh, good–the reversal spell worked. You did a reversal spell on me? Only after I found out what spell you put on ME–FIRST. Yeah, except I wasn't the first one to use that spell on you. EXACTLY. COPY-CAT. Moo. Aww. I'm a cat. … *face* I mean “meow” That's right. Cat. …moo. *face* Lookie here boys: What is it? –I'm leaving. Oh, you're gonna wanna hear this. What. I found the first “whites only” water fountain since 1962. Okay, what do you want? A deal. Oh, I'll give you a deal. Cash up front. [He presents a one dollar bill] Is this enough. [beat] Where are you going with this? Nowhere, fast. YO. What now, dude. SHE'S ONTO US. I doubt that. Look at this. I highly doubt– *gaaassp* Shenanigans! You know what I like about you, Ariana? Everything. Hah. Hm. You know how to keep a secret. I don't know what you're talking about. Exactly. *rolls eyes, flips hair.* Well, here's another one for you. –Another what? This is how my darkness becomes your darkness. I already have enough on my own. I know. You don't know. Only God knows. MOM! Don't ask me again. This is heavy, Doc. What is it? The soup! It's too heavy. Too much cream? Way too much! I have a meeting! Meeting with who? The Hollywood People. When? Soon–what time is it? I don't know. Dammit! Why don't you have any clocks in your house? I only just recently remembered what a clock was. Oh! Here. [God produces a small pocket watch and presents it to him; it's nearly noon on EARTH; But the two are sharing a meal of course in the famed kitchen of the Creator in the TImeless VOID.] Ah, Jesus Christ! He's not here… I'm gonna be late. Now, now; You know I wouldn't let that happen– [a smug look| Hugs and Kisses. [As they embrace, he disappears into a mist of light and stardust, fading away from the void and into the exterior world; he realizes God has slipped him the watch; he flips it open to reveal the time: it is now 11:44] Amazing. V.O. Now you won't wait so long to visit. [He places the wach in his pocket and walks into the studio] MICHAEL J. FOX has been asked to reprise his role as MARTY MCFLY many times before; But never for a project like this. ____ Meanwhile, What am I going to do with you? [The Festival Project.™] YOU'RE DEAD TO ME! –I'm dead to everyone! Don't do this. You wanted to come to the other side. No, I didn't. We'll you're here anyway; Might as well stay awhile. With eyes like burning fire And saddles for the riders The horse begins to gallop (or the horses, rather) On the mark to beating drums To move them forward faster What the fuck is this. idk. Kx5. *-* !_! Here u go Wat is this. it's a dragon. Oh, thats nice. Ya. Whats it do. Idk. dragon things. ok. Don't put it in ur bathroom. Why. idrk. Hm. † Hey. Ugh–No, Kaskade, go away. It's me, Ryan! No, Get out! I'm No† Ka–k (gags) –skade! Gross! It's just Ryan! I promise! NO. GET OUT. Lmfao. Right. This show is fantastic. Who was that. Fucking–Kaskade again! Are you sure. Ugh. Looks like Ryan. Kaskade is Kaskade. {shrugs] Dudes a creep. “Kaskade Ruins Lives” Is this the same episode as before? Eventually, yes. Wasn't I doing something Are you goona let this go? Um. Well I'm fucked. Why, what happened. Obsidian. That should do Unsobsidian. Okay, i'm fucked, Well, what's this? An Oreo Cookie. I mean, sitting next to it. Oh, its a portal gun. Raves are not just raves– A party is not simply a “party” –These big festivals –they're diversions. –DIstractions. Distractions from what. If you were supposed to know, –you'd know. it wouldn't be so important that you go. Why is it? These ancient rituals… It's occult magic. They've got it down to a science. The government funds this. The government funds everything. WoooooooW. It's not really a secret, if you can google it. ‘-complications.' I'm lost somewhere, gone HIppopatamus feeling quite off in the galaxies, galavanting Gazing at Daisies Aces and spades Gone from Heaven to Hades for days On the A– Adjacent Recently dismantling adjectives, Lampshades and matching curtains God it hurts, every day that I think about you; But how can i be about you when You don't even see me, do you Signature consignments, Wrong environments and irony is, I wasn't invited– –but invented it WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Great, now I have to explain myself. You don't have to. What's this space for? Oh, that's the red room. [The Red Room] Well, obviously, but– But what? What's it for? I don't think anybody should read this. HEY. Participation Only– Oh! No peeking! You ever feel like you're doing too much? Yeah, but not for money. Look, we have them surrounded. Our best course of action is to– deadmau5 . What? No– DEADMAU5. Well, are you sure it was a mouse and not a rat? It was a mouse. I know the difference. Do you, though? Look, I've lived in Mexico and New York City. So. In Queens. Oh. That's mathematically impossible. I mean it's not–impossible. No, it's not just impossible. It's mathematically impossible. Has it ever occurred to you that the DJ World in entirety exists outside of the realm of math and science? What is this. Just–enjoy the rave. No. What is this. Look at the firewoooorkkks! Woo EDC… NO. What is this right here. BEFORE: Hey, you still got that balloon? Yeah. Lemme see it. Dude, what are you doing? …I'mma go catch me a DJ. THIS IS NUTS. I can't feel my face. What do you call this? Collateral Damage. Look, I'm going to have to take frequent trips to the bathroom. ok . And–uhh– and. Uhh– Why did you call me over here. Cause i can. Look. this is not magic. This is not science. This is not “voodoo” Voodoo is magic. It's just music. W H E R E D I D H E G O O O O O I don't know. Fuck dude, I fucked up. Once again– Of course you did. What did you do this time? I might have evaporated someone with my fat fucking bass. Nice. Way to go. Yeah. Wait. … Did you just say. HE JUST He deserted me. SO WAIT, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE? ALRIGHT, WHO THREW A ROCKSTAR IN MY TENT? JEFF Alright, lets go. WHO DID THIS. So what's this place. Lets not let this conversation resurface. This is a 21 Plus Event. What about VIP VIP is 25 Plus. What about that place. Sorry kids. [NO ENTRY] We gotta get in there. So then they wanted an Encore. Did you give them an encore? NO, i was already at my hotel room. Then how did you know that they wanted an encore? WHICH IS IT, THE WYNN, OR THE ENCORE. FUCK, I DON'T REMEMBER. Please, who stays at the Encore for EDC? Have you literally never been out with rich people? No, I literally just got rich. Oh, nice. So, wait, like– Here we go. Dillon Francis has just always been rich? Uh-huh. And Skrillex has always been rich? Yes. Definitely. And deadmau5. deadmau5 is Canadian. OH MY GOD. W E L C O M E I'm going to need your absolute discretion about this. Alright. Sign this waiver. …this is a…pretty heavy packet. I'll wait. I've never signed an NDA like that in my life. Lil' biiiiiiiiiiiiiitzzzz Can we just admit it's weird that we live in an era where “NDA” is household jargon. And like, everyone knows what it means. Everyone knows what an NDA is. I appreciate the sentiments Isn't it weird how it sets in automatically? Autopilot, go. Aww, i don't want to be Autopilot. You're on autopilot. I don't really have to think about it anymore, I'll have to sleep on it Wear a white t-shift, Hear the applause of the audience, Eat it You wanna know what I think? You want to know what I'm drinking? You know what I need? An Icee, (cause I see you typing) An awful Omnipotence A God of Mirages No more carbohydrates, I gotta get all thin; Forgot to acknowledge Whether or not i'm turning this off soon I are. I…”are” I are. Infinite Reality. OH. I. R. IR! IR! IRV I ARE. Suddenly, I remember the taste of talcum powder As If I were Moving backwards In time, Like, Why, God on earth would My mom let me try that, But if i'm honest, Fuck man, I hate deadmau5– There's just too much in here. Beep boop. I love deadmau5. It's so simple. What is this, MATH?! THIS IS AERODYNAMICS. WHAT THE FUCK ARE AERO DYNAMICS DId you mean what you said about that? I meant everything I said. Goddammit, fuck this, I was in the middle of a really complex poem In realtime, listening to deadmau5 Having a partially out of body spiritual experience, Entirely fucking sober FACEPALM BLŪ 8facepalming dramatically in frustration* NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO EXPLAIN ANY OF THIS. beepboop. YO. Oh, I forgot my open form poetry, or my mom How my mom once allowed me to gnaw on talcum powder But who can blame her That was a hard one It was a past life And now ive Got Another One HOly shit what version of the cube is this. 1D. What. You'll get it. Wait. Have you ever stopped for a minute to think– I can't stop for a minute, especially just to “think” [Literally stops for a minute to think.] No fucking way, uh-uh. Come on, man. No. I ain't time travelin' wit deadmau5. Come on– NO. –that someone else has already figured all of this out and that's how any of it is possible in the first place. Alright, i'm gonna need some mind-altering drugs for this. What are you doing. Voluntary Ego Death. I– Wait. Why would you. Get out of my brain. I am your brain. Take care, now. Holy shit, it seems like she's getting more evil. That's because she's definitely more evil ALRIGHT, I'M TIRED OF THIS: WHERE IN THE FUCK IS SKRILLEX. MEANWHILE INT. IN THE FUCK. DAY. *rings doorbell* AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME. I'm not joking, that's…literally the answer to your question. Oh. Fuck. What dude. We gotta go back. I left the keys in the pocket of the guy I shapeshifted into. Are you serious? It's fine, he can't have gone too far, dude. What do you mean he “left the dimension” He entered a portal. He– wait, excuse me. A portal. A “portal”, dude? Yeah; a portal. What do you mean “a portal” A portal, like— you know, like a portal gun, but not a portal gun, just a portal. Uh huh. Excuse us for a second. What the fuck is this dude talking about? I don't know, man. Humans don't use portals! I know man. What the fuck! Well, wait—how do we know that guy is human. He looks human. Yeah dude but, we look human. Duh! Cause we shifted! Yeah, but, how do we know he's not a shifter. Because, dude, I know a shifter when I see one. Yeah, but—you know, what if he's really good. I highly doubt that. Why? Cause I'm the best. No, I am. Exactly, so we'd know if it was another shifter–cause we're the best shifters! Well, let's at least try to see if he knows anything else about those guys. They were together right? I hope not. No, not like that—like Okay, okay, whatever, let's just… Wait, where'd he go? Excuse me. What up. There was just another guy over here just now— He was like—you know—normal looking guy Tie die* shirt Yeah. Did you see him. Yeah, I saw him. Alright, cool, where'd he go? He left. What?! That was fast! Yeah, well…it happens. Are you sure? Yes. *actually is shifter* [as they walk away, the shifter shifts, and then vanishes into a random portal.] Awww, dammit, Now we're never gonna find this guy. Never say never. Whatever, we're dead. We're always dead. Yeah, but like in modern human slang terms Oh, yeah, that. Anyways, I gotta relieve this human's bladder. I fucking hate this species for this. It is useless. *enters portal potty* [ Wait, whatever actually did happen to Dillon Francis? That's great, I was just getting to that. 19 Pages. Nice. …no, 12. What. [11:12] Okay, I'm gonna kill him. Oh, I banished him. With my fists. Nice. Tits. Nice tits. Thx. Hey man. Hey what. Remember that smudge on the lens. Yeah. It just got bigger. … did you try vinegar instead of Windex. Yes. –IT'S NOT A SMUDGE. Did you try Windex with Vinegar. –IT'S NOT A– Shut up. I'm. So. Hungry. Look, do you want this, or not? Do you feel like any of this is a coincidence? Just quit, it. Dillon Francis. WHERE IS IT? I don't know. Lets kick this up a notch. ILLUMINATI What do you want? … I want the full package. ILLUMINATI Okay, I'm gonna need specifics. How do you even get a job as a courier for the illuminati? [INDEED.COM | ILLUMINATI - COURIER- URGENTLY HIRING] Hm. It was a pretty specific list. I don't even get the point of a barbeque if everyone is vegan Well, The Mayor eats fish. Oh please, where is THAT guy the Mayor of? I don't know. We meet in the Matrix. This is for you. Oh. Do you like it? I– It's not a brothel! It's Member's Only! YOu BUY a Membership. Yeah. And WOMEN. HEy, MAN, YOU CAN BUY DUDES, TOO. SHHH. Oh no. What. What did you do? I gave her my credit card. The Heavy One? Yes, and– “AND” –access to the black market. Cool, I got it. Oh, another auction. Of course another auction. What'd you buy this time? A lifesize deadmau5 bobblehead. What are you gonna do with that? Wouldn't you like to know. Ok, gross. LIL BIIIIIIIITXXXX I love a good deamau5 show. He really does have the best fans, It's a comfortable, safe space. Very inviting. Everyone is happy. What the fuck, dude, this place is a sausage fest. Yeah, that's deadmau5 for ya. Hey, I'm looking for this shithead. Oh, that dude? Yeah, have you seen him? Fuck, I wish this never happened. LIL BIIIIITz If you don't know who deadmau6* is– GET OUT. Jk. but seriously this is easily the most devastating person i've ever seen. Maybe just to me, but. Are you sure that's the right guy? Yeah, that's gotta be him. Is he wearing glasses? Ugh. Oh wait. Damn. ‘Fuck, it is my sapiosexuality, I think' Even if it was perhaps an error, as I might have more than needed a new pair of glasses myself, just the thought of Joel in a pair of specables was suddenly and immediately the equivalent of Dillon Francis sitting down at a piano, or Sonny doing just about literally anything–and I realized, finally, that the most indecent things about myself were quite possibly only happening inside my own mind– Okay, my body does really weird things to this dude's music. Are you sure this is real? No. I love this. Just shut up and do your job. What a nightmare. PLease HElP ME. Hm. That can't be right. What. This translates to H E L P M E Oh, shit, I gotta go. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm always working. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm at work. Well, that was nice and all, but–I gotta get out of here. Where are you going? To shoot myself. Wow, that's one hell of a smile. Just–take it. I'm sorry, i can't accept this. What is even happening in this series? Like, a lot WOULD YOU KIDS SETTLE DOWN. *not settling down* *lil biiiiiiiitz* You know what I wonder? I wonder this I'm sober. I'm just sober sally over here. I didn't get sober. I just am. Cause i'd rather face the pain of this harsh reality with a bite than to dull it out and then wake up in the morning Or–just–whenever– To wake up whenever and be like “OH NO, THIS IS WHAT IT'S REALLY LIKE” And the shock of it is so horrible that I just have to repeat that cycle again. ‘OH NOOOOOO” *gets faded* “It's all goooooood” No, it isn't. But i choose to stay like that cause it's like a It's not even a happy medium, It's more like a median-medium But you know what? It makes happier moments more happy And shitter moments less shitty Because i don't have this like drastic spacial Augmented reality or like smoke screen of emotional apathy. I get to feel things way more intensely. I don't have to wonder, ever “oh , did that just happen, cause I was messed up” Or like “would it have happened this way if I was sober” At all. I'm just level– No false sense of Pretty much anything. But i do wonder, though– Like, for people who weren't always sober, and then GOT sober– like , what's the breaking point What's the tip? I always have to sit back and wonder “What did you DO?” Cause you know it had to be something if suddenly “I don't drink anymore” I always wonder, and it's like– no disrespect or anything thing but… I really wanna hear that story. lol . I know you don't wanna tell it (if you can) But wanna hear it. Cause from my point of view. IT's probably hilarious. I know. I'm a dick. Holy shit. What is that. Looks like pasquale went all out with the fireworks this year. …is that a penis? WELCOME HOME It's a giant dick- in-the-sky! GOD IS REAL! JESUS Look, so i've been having second thoughts about this whole thing. What the fuck man. You gotta stop doing shit like this. JESUS I literally can't. I know, but. Okay, look. I'm not writing any of that. You've gotta tell him. NO, RYAN. WELL, WHY NOT. BECAUSE, RYAN. WHY. DEADMAU5 ISN'T REAL. Damn, am I in here. Nice. Of course I am. Well, how'd that happen. This is like a sea of cellphones. Perfect. It was a red car; I wasn't all there, And if you want her, You can have her Fuck. What. I forgot the rest of the verse. It's ok. We gotta move on. No, I gotta go back. For what. For my fans. Aw. What's this. IT's a ceramic mug. Wow, that's nice. I made it Wait. You made that?! Yeah. With your hands?! Yeah. Why would you do that? For you. What. I made it for you? Like, you thought of me first, then you made it? Yeah. WHY? Cause i love you! WOW. Fans are awesome OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *Sometimes. *vomits* … *dies* … *godlessness* [Devastating DJ Moments] I don't get it dawg, all this shit is in your music particles?! “Music particles” UGH. what . That's it. Don't be smart around me. Uh. I'm not smart? No, that won't work; sarcasm is a sign of deeper intelligence. “Sorry” Stop saying that. This is America. S– Don't say it again. Apology not accepted. Don't look at me like that. Like what. With your face. *face* Quick: Say something stupid and random. …I like anime. Oh good, that worked. Thanks. Where are you going? Idk somewhere else. Really, that's it? Yeah. That's all you have to say/ That's literally it. Are you seeing this. Yes. So what's the problem. Oh no, she's stuck in a loop. Throw the whole fan away. [DELETE] Did it work. Did what work. Oh, good. Cool. Wait. See ya later. Did what work? I wish i could just forget about this. Everything? Yeah. Look, this is between me and God–okay? GOD Don't drag me into this. You dragged ME into this! GOD Right. So i could get OUT; So don't drag me back in. Fuck, I remember this. I must have done something important here. Like what. Look, I love you. Great, now what do we do? Bury the body, I guess. *shrugs* Wait, what happened? Somebody dies. OKay, me first. Other Three: Who wants to go next. *still in shock* Fuck man, told you this was a long ass story. *Crying* I'm ruined. What! You went broke? No, i'm still a filthy rich millionaire. I thought you were a billionaire. I am I just *snifs* sometimes I forget that happened. “Sometimes I forget I'm a billionaire” I got to admit, man, I did it to myself. I'm not mad, or anything, but now there's just–certain things I can't do Oh, like what. Not that song. What, why not? You said “anything but Skrillex” this is not Skrillex, this is deadmau5. What's the difference? Okay, that's like saying “What's the difference between deadmau5' and my music?” No, it isn't. How is that not different? That's like comparing the music of Bach and Beethoven to the music of a tattooed hedgehog. You think I look like a hedgehog. No, it's just when I see you and a hedgehog I have all the same thoughts, turn this off. NO, i like this song. Seriously, Dillon Francis, turn it off. I'm gonna turn it up instead. I do not highly recommend doing that. Or at all. This ship has amazing subs. Should I bass boost this song. NO, PROBABLY NOT. Oh, why not? Dillon Francis, I'm warning you, stop. OH HOW COME BECAUSE WHY? BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A HEDEHOG NO, BECAUSE I ALWAYS FALL ASLEEP AT THIS *DROP* [INSTANTLY FALLS ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL–ACTIVATES HYPERSPACE– PLUMMETS SHIP INTO BLACK – HOLE. ohhhhh . What a hoe. Nice, that's a whole episode. Well, here's a bonus scene or whatever. Shazam, what is this. SHAZAM …i don't know. What do you mean you don't know. SHAZAM *panicing* IDONNO WHAT DO YOU MEAN– SHAZAM IDON. NO. OOOOOOOOOOOO Is this deadmau5. I'm not sure. Sounds like deadmau5. It sure does. This is pretty Ooh. it sparkles. yeah , it's deadmau5. How does she KNOW. I need a deadmau5 machine like right now. I know where to find that. Fuck dude, everything's gonna be half-ass until I push out this album. You can't rush it. Trust the process. I can't focus. Oh shit, wasn't this in the last episode? Yeah. I'm still writing backwards. God, what is that, like a pipe organ. WHAT SYNTH IS THIS. Doesn't matter, I just need one. That's it. I know what I'm going to spend my Jimmy Fallons On. And What's that? V.O. OOh. Are we Montaging–to deadmau5? [MONTAGE: deadmau5] Nice. I love a good montage. I love deadmau45* AHH OH NO. I love deadmau5. I keep making typos and I keep forgetting to delete that parallel where. fuckit. That's the synth I've always wanted. It's on sale for $999 At Sam Ash But…you only have Five JImmy Fallons. There are only five special edition in this Volume The Jimmy Fallon 555's I don't know how many volumes there are, but this is the Volume I started keeping track. Fuck, man. I miss Equinox. It's just Eucalyptus. They also have an outdoor running track where you get the best ever view of midtown manhattan. How do you know it's the best ever view of Midtown manhattan. Because it's on a running track. STOP WHISTLING IN MY WHOOP=WHOOPS. The JImmy Fallon 555s are marked with the standard Jimmy Fallon in black ink With a simple side marker of the number 555 in red And also in red, a telephone number on the back. But–that synthesizer is One Thousand Jimmy Fallons. Yeah. So I only need Nine Hundred Ninety Five More. And of course, the Eye of Providence is highlighted. Also Standard. V.O. I always highlight that. Cause, you know… “Illuminati” These are fake. No they're not! They're counterfeit, sorry. No they're not! They're authentic! Why the fuck does this matter so much? You know. What is it with this dude. If it was a snake, it would've bit ya. It was a snake. And it did bite me. He's so increasingly beautiful to me, And I'm still in love with his friend, or misrepresented masterpiece, Progression of a monster, or procession of a superstar, but Something in the story sparks the thought of All we are is consciousness, of course Awkward in body, but of constellations Cosmos, It's not just a corpse; It's all got love in it, Absurd, and sipping carbonated syrup, but I'm just sitting in my stirrups, Here comes galloping a horse, Of course, it hurts to turn it off For just a moment And remember That i'm just a homeless, Stuck and sitting up at night Writing recourse, hugging learning curves in ableton, Curving curses, been reminded that I'm worthless In a thousand words or less, Or just another form of torture, Nothing said, but all that's done Another day another dollar, But it's not It's Jimmy Fallon. I thought this was enter the multiverse. Are you ready to go. No. A hand on my shoulder So paifully socially awkward, I grow stretchmarks, don't know what to call them But scars, But the uglier ones, I've thought Are invisible, Somewhat– To the naked eye Or just anyone Not tiger stripes But one, an eye of horus Carved above my right And inside my lip, (The bottom one) A raised scar in the shape of a sythe I probably died by the hands of a man named Starr So it's hard to shrug it off, And 555 is just a number But it's not It's another scar, It's a punishment For loving him. What's on the back. It's…a number. What number? A telephone number. What. Like a 1-800 Number Call it. I love deadmau5. Something about a big, giant smiling robotic mouse that lights up and sparkles. Why? I don't know. I'm like 5. I see deadmau5 i'm like “WHEEEEEEE” My hands go up in the air “AHHHHHH! YAYYYYY” I'm so stupid. It's so stupid. But you know what? It makes me feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I love it. And by the time I even figured out what deadmau5 was I was so late to the party that I had to make up for lost time. I listened to deadmau5 doing EvErYThING. Everything you could possibly imagine. Well–Except one. Wait, how long have you been cellibate? Forever, probably. Fuck, what happened in here? I don't know. Everything's broken. My head My heart. Everything. Get up, Dillon Francis. Fuck, what happened. You sent us through a black hole. And we crashed on a random ass planet. Fuck, that sucks. YOu suck, Dillon Francis. Ugh. Now get up. Everything's fucked up. SUPERSTAR DJ I'm a paradox. I've got a box of skeletons in my closet i'm not ready to part with. I had a heart attack; I had a heart once, But lately it goes in my pocket; Or my right hand, When I wake up From a dream land, From a long hug From a nice man In a t-shirt KASKADE This is God's PLAN. RYAN, GET FUCKED. 800-799-7233 Did you call the number. Yeah. What is it. [National Domestic Violence Hotline] Woah. That was a long bonus scene. Well, Now here's a PSA. AND A PSA? YES. A PSA. You know what the fucked up thing about all this is, The Legend of Supacree is a true story. All of it. ALL OF IT?! ALL OF IT!? YES. Even the part about– YES. Especially that part. Woah. Damn. I think i'm gonna be sick. Shut up, Dillon Francis. No, but seriously– This is the story of how I got my heart broken so bad. YOU RUINED IT. So, so bad– I HATE YOU. That i started singing about it. NSA, totally *not spying* …are you hearing this. Yes. ILLUMINATI Check this out. Another one down. And how when you start making music– What is this. it's hoe math. And that music actually comes from a really real place. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. really real shit starts happening. You–killed yourself. well , to be fair–I lost everything first. Congratulations. Thx. Here's a skrillex. WHT. Kbye. Really, really, really. What, the fuck Dillon Francis, crawled inside of you to live and made it'self at home? Idon'tknow. What is in this sauce? Just–kill him. What, i can't just. Just kill him, while nobody is watching. Please don't kill me. Shut up, man. I'm having a thought process. Okay, that's it. FUCK DILLON FRANCIS. That's the spirit. THAT IS THE SPIRIT. IT'S THE HOLY SPIRIT. Who the fuck is this. It's–Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ?! JESUS CHRIST i'M BACK, MOTHERFUCKER. Wait, are you claiming that the second coming of the messiah is upon us?! YES. Well,Technically, it's the third. And it's all because of Dillon Francis?! I Please stop this HATE Help YOU. Fuck, dude. I know, huh. What did he DO. The third?! How did we miss that?! Uh, you didn't. [HITLER, being HITLER] (he was mad) Okay, that's it. You can't write any of this. Uh, I can. I just did. Technically, I'm dead: this is just a voiceover It's an 80's style PSA You can't say Hitler was the messiah. That's offensive. Everything is offensive. FUCK YOU DILLON. I'msosorry NOTYETYOU'RENOT. Wait, whatever happened to Skrillex. SKRILLEX is waiting outside of the alleged home of SUPACREE's “distant relatives” Lol is he for real at her mom's house. well , to be fair, he's like–looked everywhere else. Ur right. That was a lot of dimensions. So. like. Fuck, i didn't even have that much coffee. It just goes on forever. [DILLON FRANCIS STILL HAS HOTSAUCE IN HIS PUDGY LITTLE EYES] Good. Cause if I see the pupils, i'm wasting him. You think you can do better than this. Better than this? Yes. Yes. Then do it. Alright, is the PSA over? No, not yet. I gotta say one more thing. What is it? Would you ever have done it, Or would you ever be honest If you had, Handed her a lesson, Or a stretch of the past From the present moment, My heart, and my mind And my lover I present you this honor From now on to nowhere I no longer… Want to be near you Or to know you Or to hear you Or to fear you No longer… Want to feel you Or to touch you Or to have you Or to hold you Or to love you No longer, I no longer want you Devastating, A song stuck in my head for a whole world I wonder how long it would take to go back there A room full of actors, A manager, Never a backpack to wear Just a handful of hats, One director, Eventually producer Just now a showrunner Look at how long that took. I had to wonder what auroras in the north thought of someone like Sonny. They showed me. Now I can love you no longer So much for getting acquainted Funny what age equates to in ageless An infinite wisdom, I dismissed him, Nor, would I believe that he ever would hit her, but Some might belong in such a category Though i carry the marks and the scars Of what my once- husband did to me –but no longer. I haven't a heart in the world left But a broken one, made of amethyst. Fuck off, Dillon Francis. A calculated attack on my psyche. I like it a lot, But i'm fonder of sodom. WHAT. Are you saying you woul actually participate in an orgy! Oh GOD no! Oh, Good, cause– But i'd host one. WHAT. The hedonists are a fun bunch. Oh my God. Though, Nowadays, of course, I haven't the slightest idea what to call them. I saw the future. Well, obviously, if you've headlined EDC you've seen the future. I remember all of it. That must be awful. Why don't you remember it? Because i don't want to. Not at all. I did once. Then what happened? I hated it so much, i forgot. You forgot on purpose. I had to. Love, or Music. …Music. Love, or Fame. Fame. Okay, ouch. Love, or Music? …Love. Okay. Love, or Fame. Love. Okay. Love, or music? … Isn't that the same thing? Hm. Love, or Fame? ….Why do you keep asking me the same question. I beg your pardon? Why beg? I mean– What do you mean? What do you mean? Well, first you asked me, If would rather have Love or Music. Love. Music. Yes. In my mind, those are synonyms. Neither can really exist without the other. Okay, and Fame. Love and Fame are also synonyms– How so? Ugh, I just made this difficult on myself. It was always difficult. It really wasn't. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U. WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Yo My horizontal monster wants ya Could revert to vert, but lets keep Our options open Covert, __ My heart is broken No window open Who left the draft in –motherfucker My heart is broken I need a lover I need a lover Some one to hug me I need a hug, but And– I'm not fit to touch The hem of your garment The tip of your dick or fit enough to be your girlfriend I guess i'll just have to live with that When I have an itch, I scratch it myself I made the assumption you can't, And moved passed it But something's been calling me out, from the past Something's been calling me back to the magic I can't get around that Do you hate me? I can see that I'll just make my way back to the beginning Though I'm envious And i pity her, The both of you really There's nothing left between us except Insanity//Infinity Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written INT. SAM ASH MANHATTAN. DAY. A tiny conga for 90 dollars I could die in here Maybe I am just like you I find my way to the prettiest thing in the room And have my way with it Just for a few minutes Consume it, then move on Saw Madison dancing badly on Madison Avenue It's okay, You're a white girl So everybody loves you Everybody loves you Everybody loves you, no matter what you do. As for me, I can't say when I'm going through But you couldn't do it, Madison That's as bad as being at a standst

taking a break to try to stop the coughing. idk sux ppl can just be controlled like that. doing my best to be my best ^.^ gotta smile thru tha gross hacking coughing demon ppl everywhere lol (not cool) :( oh - also go listen to Dillon Francis's new album 'This MixtapE is Fire Too' cuz it is fire (except 2 songs i had to skip) plz don't hurt otherscover your mouthn don't be evil demon ppl thx for listening. peace. -b. [so far in the pregame:] For fear of fire; Best not to wander off, With no back track– Might have forgotten the rest, but It wasn't a poem, or part of a song At least, not yet Fuck man. I really want to sample this. Can't sample deadmau5; he's a bitch about paperwork. You cant technically say that. I mean, I technically didnd't. Just let your fingers do the talking. Ooh, look at that one. What are you doing. Some online shopping. For what. A man-thing. You're better off letting your back end Handle the conversation Then again, When in search of a venue Anything with the proper connections And stereo systems Will do in the moment. What do you want? To get rid of my hiccups. That's it: *huccups* yu-p. Wow, that's– Have you ever thought about just– I've thought about just about everything–that's how you got here. I'm gonna go ahead and admit–there's too much going on in my head. It's a lot. I'm gonna need a nap. GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME. *sheath/ swoard* Is that the sword of skrillex. Yeus. Give it to me. *stabs in thigh* Oooh. Not the balls! fair. Around the world we go Around we go again Here we are Oh no, It's the same song Over and over I'd like you to love to today (I'd love to forget for a moment I haven't) I know before long, we get older and older All wrong, It's the same one, Over and over. Have you seen my butt plugs? NO! GROSS. It's alright. I'll just pick some up on the way. AGGH. Better yet, can you just put in the order on amazon AmAZoN. Yes. (I'm so happy Amazon has anal plugs.) Please stop now. You're being a baby about this–just- You know what. Nevermind. I'll do it myself. Please do that. Siri– Oh my God. Alexa–reorder from Amazon. Come on focus. …hmm…now what was I doing? A B L E T O N *spinning rainbow wheel of doom* …seems like it was something. Come on….FOCUS. Hm. When's the last time you had a marshmello. Flashback: [BONFIRE: Burning The Skrillex] *Also making smores* CUT BACK TO: Like never, I'm vegan. PASQUALE WAKE. UP. Holy shit. It's you again. It's always me. Last time you were like 26. Well, now i'm this age. Wait, how old are you. Wouldn't you like to know. There's a lot of things i'd like to know about you, Pasquale, that's not even near the top of the list. Speaking of “top of the list”-- I do have a lot of things to do today. Oh yeah, what's that? I don't know. A bunch of crap. Speaking of crap– This is a lot of speaking. Happy Birthday. What is this. It's Captain Crunch. Yes it is. What is it doing in my lap. That's your lunch. I–no, it isn't. It is. No, i'm vegan. Well, that's the “happy” part in “happy birthday” No… Yes, actually. This is – It is– Vegan. Damn. Jinx. You owe me a Pererier. Shut up. Or a LaCroix. I'll taka a LaCroix. You're so LA. I guess that makes you Beverly Hills– Or Pacific Palisades. Is that Annexed. It is “LA” What else is in this? No animal product… “Yellow 6” It reads! What happened to yellow 1-5? A whole story. Yes, but not a whole food. “Yellow 6?!” That's the chemical complex you need to find yourself in the right dimension. Exactly. What's wrong with this dimension? What isn't? I'm in it! You're in it! Like I said. What– Just eat it. Ugh– happy trails. *disappears* Ugh. I gave that dude too much money. Fuck, what was I doing again. Deadmau5. Uhm, no i was– Deadmau5. Deadmau5. OOOOOH> YES. I KNOW IT'S YOU, YOU SLIMY MOTHERFUCKER. Stop it. YOU STOP IT. I KNOW IT'S YOU. Who is it? STOP IT. Stop–doing that. I know you're deadmau5. I most certainly am not. I know its you. I have boobs. How did you do this. I did–n't. That's right. Fuck, what happened. Nothin. Now I gotta kill my stupid brother. You have a brother?! SKRILLEX. GET IN HERE. Fuck, run. I gotta go. Go where. Uhm. Somewhere else. DILLON, THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE. IT WAS NEVER FUNNY. (It was funny to me.) God does have a sense of humor. AHAH–AHAHA–HAHAHA. As it turns out, not the absolute best sense of humor. Oh—he's okay! He's okay! No, he's dead. He's definitely dead. But a sense of humor, nonetheless. Fuck man. What did you do to Dillon Francis. Nothing. I just got him drunk On what?! Cyanide? Okay, I don't even know what that is. He's a corpse. –but a pretty one. C'mon. Be serious. I can't. Why not. It's hilarious, kinda. This isn't funny. No, it's hilarious. He earned it. He “earned” it? Well, yes– He is dead. I mean, it's a long story; but he brought it upon himself, honestly. “Honestly” Please. PLease. Please. No, I said. PLEASE. I SAID NO. What's this story. That's ten. I win. Fuck. DILLOn WAkE UP. *smacks* ahah. I think it's working I think he's waking up. He's not waking up. He must be. He's laughing. He's not laughing He said “haha' *smacks* haha . See. *smacks* Mm. This shit smacks HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKKKSSSS. Oh shit, is this the 90s. HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKSSS. *slams* GIMMIE MY HONEY SMACKS. That's it. There's no more. AW, COME ON. Sorry, that's all there is. WHAT. But yu can have captain crunch. I DON'T WANT CAPTAIN CRUNCH. I WANT HONEY SMACKS. I'm sorry, there are no more Honey Smacks. You can have Captain Crunch, or Shredded Wheat. GRAMPA Shredded Wheat is MY favorite. Ugh. Mm. Honey Smacks. I HATE YOU. Be nice to your brother. Lol. Everything about Dillon's eyes makes him devastating. Who plays tiny Dillon? I don't know. There are like nine in the script. It shouldn't be hard to cast. We'll go to utah. Fucking. I hate Utah. WELCOME TO UTAH. Nice. Alright, well, what other grounds are there to cover, here? DILLOn FRANCIS I am not doing this project. Of course you are–it's in your contract. What contract. The one you signed. Which–no–I didn't. But you did. SUNNI BLU I got you a drink. DILLON FRANCIS That looks fruity. SUNNI BLU Try it. DILLON FRANCIS *sips* DILLON FRANCIS CONT'D What's in this. Just– drink it. SUNNI BLU Don't look at me like that. DILLOn FRANCIS Like what. SUNNI BLU Do you need a mirror? DILLON FRANCIS I– SUNNI BLU Look down. DILLON FRANCIS *does* SUNNI BLU *flicking nose* Made you look. haha . DILLOn FRANCIS Wow. [takes drink] SUNNI BLUThat's the spirit. But literally there's a mirror between your feet, if you need one. [there literally is] SUNNI BLU CONT'D The floor is made of mirrors DILLOn FRANCIS *suddenly inebriated* Oh wow. SUNNI BLU The whole club turns into a disco ball. DILLON FRANCIS *suddenly very inebriated* That's–convenient. SUNNI BLU It is. SHIA DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS. If my dreams were not just dreams, everyone in here would have a lawsuit against me. A lot of us do. Carry on, then. SKRILLEX BLAIGH. Oh shit, its you again. I swear to God, I thought I killed this nigga. Are you sure it was him? SKRILLEX !!!! No. Alright, i've almost got it. Almost got what. This whole– thing. Oh. –and–it's gone. Really, that quick. I don't think you understand what's happening. You're right, i don't understand what's happening at all. Oh shit. I'm deadmau5. Nice. Fuck it, lets do some trolling. Alright alright. BUT FIRST, COFFEE. Fuck dude, I don't think I should have anymore coffee. Too late. deadmau5. ok . Deadmau5. Nice. D–0 DOn'T D o THis, I'M WARNING YOU. …. If you open that portal, there's no going back. *opens portal* Now you've done it. *goes into portal* Fuck. *portal closes neatly* *facepalm* *entire series of cosmos collapse in the great distance–time begins to stretch and bend uncontrollably* Come on, just let me lick the balls. NO. I'll give you a cookie. well … OH my GAWD. What. Come here, you have to see this. What the fuck is that. I don't know. Should i pick it up? No, don't touch it! He picked it up. Oh, gross. What is this. I don't know. I think it's fanfiction. Who wrote it. Idk. somefangirl. Fangurl. FaNGiRls. Well, Hey, at least i'm not a groupie. OH COME ON, JUST LET ME SUCK IT. GET AWAY FROM ME. PLEASE. i'LL GIVE YOU $40. -well. NOW, A COMMERCIAL BREAK. Since when does this show have commercials. It doesn't. I want to talk to Jimmy Fallon. That's–not happening. Why not. JIMMY FALLON BECAUSE I HAVE A CONTRACT WITH NBC. There he is– Nice. JIMMY FALLON YOU MOTHERFUCKER. I AM A FAMILY MAN, OKAY. Is that like Family Guy? By Chance?! SETH MCFARLENE (with super long hair) *crossing fingers* I'm hoping so. JIMMY FALLON Not even close! SETH MCFARLENE *snaps* Dammit. Oh, I get it. It's like–The Cofffee run Which “coffee run” THE coffee run. We'll have to admit, it's probably the most watched coffee run of all time. Of all of them. You know what? Fuck it, fire me. I'm doing this show. What?! JImmy. Why on EARTH would you ever agree to something like this. JIMMY FALLON THE COSMIC AVENGER Because–it's my duty. Yo. You know that song that everybody knows? You know the song because everybody knows this song. It goes: Lovin you– is easy cause youre beautiful. do - do- do - do- do- do- do… Yeah. You know that song. But you probably don't know who sings it. I'll tell you who sings it. That song is by an artist called Minnie Ripperton. That's a mouthful. Yeah, one hell of a name, huh. Well, that's the lady who sings the song. It's Minnie Riperton. Now, let me tell you something else you probably don't know: Something I probably wouldn't know if I wasn't a DJ But i know this, because I'm a DJ AND MAYA RUDOLPH WAUT A MINUTE. What the fuck, Maya Rudoph, are you doing in my bathroom at 5 AM It's 1:15 in the afternoon. I'm a DJ. It's 5 AM. That's making sense. I know it is. What's not making sense. Is why you're in my bathroom drinking a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. So it is. *slurps milkshake* *sitting on toilet* *slurps* What do you want. You want to know what I want? Apparently, a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. OK. OK. OK so what. Finish the script. –What? Fuck dude, how does this song sound good every time? Congratulations, you've gone entirely insane. beep-boop . [DJ] B00p beep. [Music Producer] Beep-beep. 0.c. Do not fall dangerously in love; Do not pass go Do not collect $200 Or any of it For any reason, For any of it For any of them Just keep it pushin; Just keep it private Just hold it all in and Do not let go Do not fall in love Do not pass go Do not unload Do not walk Do not cross here Do not It smells like butter. But you're vegan. I know. Do you think you're having a stroke. God, I fucking hope so. GOD You WHAT. I want to die. GOD I thought i heart you right. You heard me right–a THOUSAND times. I want to die. Take me out of this life. GOD Not until you make dubstep. WHAT. GOD You gotta make a grammy-winning dubstep album. I what. GOD Or at least nominated. No, I don't. GOD Beg your pardon. I'm not begging. GOD What are you getting at, hon? Look; Am I not one with the source? GOD Uhm–you are. Alright, Then: everything is everything. GOD Yes. And everyone is everyone. GOD This is true. So i'm Skrillex. GOD Skrillex is Skrillex So I Am. GOD … And I already won a grammy. GOD … Like a bunch of them, right. GOD Uh. So technically– GOD YOu know what. I can't argue with that logic. This isn't ableton. No. This is Logic. What the fuck. That's not Serato. No, that's Rekordbox. What the fuck is this. These are CDJs. There's no hot cues! What the fuck is a “HOT CUE” This is not food. What the fucking sauce. I'm warning you, Pasquale. Get off my lawn. THIS IS MY HOUSE. Your house it is not. *House music starts blasting* *lasers* sprinklers* dancers* WHAT THE FUCK. It's voice activated, I just– How did you do this?! What. WHAT DID YOu DO. AND WHEN. I don't know! I just took the delorean, like you said. You were supposed to find Dillon Francis. I did! The problem was, when I found the right one, he was dead! What? He's dead? Presumably! What do you mean by that!? It's a long story! WELL, HOW LONG? SUNNI BLU About as long as my dick! WHO IS THAT. I told you it's a long story. Well, let me in! Sorry Pasquale. No Can do. What. Why not. Cause you're on a federal watch list. What. Yeah. Sorry. Wait… You should probably leave before the feds get here. What? Unless you want to stay and party on the lawn but–not recommended. This is bizarre. The police arrive, surrounding Pasquale on the yard–moving in to arrest him. WAIT. SUPACREE turns away from the window; inside, a room full of her aliases sit looking somewhat miserably; SUPACREE!!! [Pasquale is handcuffed and i dragged off of the lawn] SUPACREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Careless, Acoustic–deadmau5 SUPACREE pours a bowl of captain crunch, taking one colossal bite and sits down in THE CONTROL ROOM at a large computer console; inhaling from a can of nitrous oxide. I'm the worst DJ ever. SUPACREE places the fames deadmau5 helmet atop her head and begins working at the computer promptly, clicking away; Now is deadmau5 I don't even know what key this song is in. MEOWINGTONS, Alive and well purrs and stretches, then settles atop SUPACREE/deadmau5's lap. This is insane. I don't know what's happening. END CREDITS. V. O. Lovin' You, Minnie Ripperton Carless, deadmau5 idk how i'm gonna mix that. Trust me. Anything can be mixed. Anything. [When it] Turns out, The bottom of your heart Was the tip of the Ice Berg And the whole ship has [s]unk[en], [&] I[t]'s probably ice cold At the bottom of the ocean; I'll tell you where i'm from Why, I'll tell you anything for About one dollar Turns out, I've already got one eye on you; One eye'd sad heart I should probably roll out my art on you [I probably should not] One man bought a kiss, Another, a whole night from her– One man bought a whole farm The other, a Whole Foods Market –and you can't even franchise those Amazon's got a monopoly We were playing for corners of earth, All i got was some kandi, Subscriptions to candidly, Actually, I really liked the tree trial (I think i'll wait a week, sorry) When it turns out The world that you wanted Was actually hours already The dollar you got Was also borrowed And the money they wanted and got Was just actually stolen from someone else They bought all the food up And sold it for profits I promise this avocado Once costs nothing at all But you wanted that car for your daughter She's got a mercedes and don't even drive it My mom, on my honor Of all the garages in Lost Lands, I promise the owner of it was The first to go last, And the last to come home Now he's on his own alter And also the worshiper; How do you go back? Oh, you don't Oh you don't Oh, you don't wanna know that But i was of course, All of your rock bottoms It's bottoms and tops, and We don't let the top fall over, We're counting up crumbs And this muffin costs $24 dollars Pour a whole bottle of coconut water out on the sidewalks For the dead homies Not dead in the general sense But just in the head, the heart, And the soul The homeless are happier at McDonalds Than asking at crossroads and crosswalks For dollars I'd rather spend elsewhere I'll avoid the power struggle at operations for about 18 dollars and 56 sense (Please, keep the pennies) I'm feeling around in my 6th sense that there's Something indecent, or decadent Whichever it is Cause i'm better of with the memory of it Than actually dragging it in. –I'm a cat again. Ouch. Shut up. It HURTS. Of course it hurts, you just had heart surgery without any anistetics. YEah, but to be fair–that was a lot of acid. Yes, but lucily for you– –or, for him– Lucily for us, there's no lethal amount of acid. –Ouch– –Shut up. That we know of. George Washington John Adams Thomas Jefferson James Monroe Nope, can't for the life of me remember the 5th Oh shit, I was wrong Turns out, my memory only can hold three. That's a good number I really wish you'd stop just–showing up like this. I never leave. Then go away. I live here. I know you'd like to think that, but– Okay, I'm going to tell you something but I need you to remain calm. What time is it? I don't care Are we gonna make a movie? Depends; is it gonna make me money. FINE. I don't need anymore information about anything else: only these three. Are you serious? I wish I wasn't. I need you to do this. Look, Timmy–I'm not really into grantng wishes anymore. It always blows back on me. A blowjob. Uh huh. That's why you're bothering me. I–would rather you just pick up the call. Take a message. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like that. Like that. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like this Like that. Like — _____ The urge to eat had suddenly left me I wanted a burrito, (But I want to eat red meat) I've gotta stop thinking in sequences and parentheses Complex lines, and writing in past tense so presently. I probably should eat (But probably shouldn't…) I'm starting to bleed; As if i'd been fasting Perhaps, though I had been But had so indulgently feasted On calories enough to last me Till after today (or even till next week) PAY ATTENTION. Woah, to WHAT. Holy shit, I knew this dude was a psychopath but. This is real. ARE YOU SEEING THIS. I “see” it. I should stop meditating in public. You see this? I know everything about you. Why? I bought it on the internet. What is it. Metadata. That's…flattering. Yeah. Wake up. Why, where are we going? Atlanta. What's in Atlanta? You see this? Yes. Do you know what it is? Uh, it's a– What is it? It's a doll. It's not a doll. Oh, it's not. Gimmie a dollar. -_- It's a poppit. “Dr pimple popper” Ew that's fucking gross. I hate this. Let me see. Does s/he have backne? Yes/No. Great, i'll take it. Fuckit. Okay, I got to “whatever”. You went too far. What? I thought I was supposed to go past “fuckit” Yeah, you go past fuckit, I did that! But if you get to “whatever”, you've gone too far. You've gotta go back. Back to WHAT. There was almost no space between “fuckit” and “whatever” Oh trust me. There is. So? This is how he's been controlling you. And? And!? Has it ever occurred to you that I want to be controlled? What! That it just takes the right person to get that kind of permission– permission to what Permission to ride. … Maybe I gave him the reigns. What horse “gives” its rider the reigns. Who said anything about a horse?! Another Horse Mix. Nice. fuck . FYCK. I told you. You know what…Maybe that's my poppit. What. Maybe. I'm so confused. Oh, good–the reversal spell worked. You did a reversal spell on me? Only after I found out what spell you put on ME–FIRST. Yeah, except I wasn't the first one to use that spell on you. EXACTLY. COPY-CAT. Moo. Aww. I'm a cat. … *face* I mean “meow” That's right. Cat. …moo. *face* Lookie here boys: What is it? –I'm leaving. Oh, you're gonna wanna hear this. What. I found the first “whites only” water fountain since 1962. Okay, what do you want? A deal. Oh, I'll give you a deal. Cash up front. [He presents a one dollar bill] Is this enough. [beat] Where are you going with this? Nowhere, fast. YO. What now, dude. SHE'S ONTO US. I doubt that. Look at this. I highly doubt– *gaaassp* Shenanigans! You know what I like about you, Ariana? Everything. Hah. Hm. You know how to keep a secret. I don't know what you're talking about. Exactly. *rolls eyes, flips hair.* Well, here's another one for you. –Another what? This is how my darkness becomes your darkness. I already have enough on my own. I know. You don't know. Only God knows. MOM! Don't ask me again. This is heavy, Doc. What is it? The soup! It's too heavy. Too much cream? Way too much! I have a meeting! Meeting with who? The Hollywood People. When? Soon–what time is it? I don't know. Dammit! Why don't you have any clocks in your house? I only just recently remembered what a clock was. Oh! Here. [God produces a small pocket watch and presents it to him; it's nearly noon on EARTH; But the two are sharing a meal of course in the famed kitchen of the Creator in the TImeless VOID.] Ah, Jesus Christ! He's not here… I'm gonna be late. Now, now; You know I wouldn't let that happen– [a smug look| Hugs and Kisses. [As they embrace, he disappears into a mist of light and stardust, fading away from the void and into the exterior world; he realizes God has slipped him the watch; he flips it open to reveal the time: it is now 11:44] Amazing. V.O. Now you won't wait so long to visit. [He places the wach in his pocket and walks into the studio] MICHAEL J. FOX has been asked to reprise his role as MARTY MCFLY many times before; But never for a project like this. ____ Meanwhile, What am I going to do with you? [The Festival Project.™] YOU'RE DEAD TO ME! –I'm dead to everyone! Don't do this. You wanted to come to the other side. No, I didn't. We'll you're here anyway; Might as well stay awhile. With eyes like burning fire And saddles for the riders The horse begins to gallop (or the horses, rather) On the mark to beating drums To move them forward faster What the fuck is this. idk. Kx5. *-* !_! Here u go Wat is this. it's a dragon. Oh, thats nice. Ya. Whats it do. Idk. dragon things. ok. Don't put it in ur bathroom. Why. idrk. Hm. † Hey. Ugh–No, Kaskade, go away. It's me, Ryan! No, Get out! I'm No† Ka–k (gags) –skade! Gross! It's just Ryan! I promise! NO. GET OUT. Lmfao. Right. This show is fantastic. Who was that. Fucking–Kaskade again! Are you sure. Ugh. Looks like Ryan. Kaskade is Kaskade. {shrugs] Dudes a creep. “Kaskade Ruins Lives” Is this the same episode as before? Eventually, yes. Wasn't I doing something Are you goona let this go? Um. Well I'm fucked. Why, what happened. Obsidian. That should do Unsobsidian. Okay, i'm fucked, Well, what's this? An Oreo Cookie. I mean, sitting next to it. Oh, its a portal gun. Raves are not just raves– A party is not simply a “party” –These big festivals –they're diversions. –DIstractions. Distractions from what. If you were supposed to know, –you'd know. it wouldn't be so important that you go. Why is it? These ancient rituals… It's occult magic. They've got it down to a science. The government funds this. The government funds everything. WoooooooW. It's not really a secret, if you can google it. ‘-complications.' I'm lost somewhere, gone HIppopatamus feeling quite off in the galaxies, galavanting Gazing at Daisies Aces and spades Gone from Heaven to Hades for days On the A– Adjacent Recently dismantling adjectives, Lampshades and matching curtains God it hurts, every day that I think about you; But how can i be about you when You don't even see me, do you Signature consignments, Wrong environments and irony is, I wasn't invited– –but invented it WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Great, now I have to explain myself. You don't have to. What's this space for? Oh, that's the red room. [The Red Room] Well, obviously, but– But what? What's it for? I don't think anybody should read this. HEY. Participation Only– Oh! No peeking! You ever feel like you're doing too much? Yeah, but not for money. Look, we have them surrounded. Our best course of action is to– deadmau5 . What? No– DEADMAU5. Well, are you sure it was a mouse and not a rat? It was a mouse. I know the difference. Do you, though? Look, I've lived in Mexico and New York City. So. In Queens. Oh. That's mathematically impossible. I mean it's not–impossible. No, it's not just impossible. It's mathematically impossible. Has it ever occurred to you that the DJ World in entirety exists outside of the realm of math and science? What is this. Just–enjoy the rave. No. What is this. Look at the firewoooorkkks! Woo EDC… NO. What is this right here. BEFORE: Hey, you still got that balloon? Yeah. Lemme see it. Dude, what are you doing? …I'mma go catch me a DJ. THIS IS NUTS. I can't feel my face. What do you call this? Collateral Damage. Look, I'm going to have to take frequent trips to the bathroom. ok . And–uhh– and. Uhh– Why did you call me over here. Cause i can. Look. this is not magic. This is not science. This is not “voodoo” Voodoo is magic. It's just music. W H E R E D I D H E G O O O O O I don't know. Fuck dude, I fucked up. Once again– Of course you did. What did you do this time? I might have evaporated someone with my fat fucking bass. Nice. Way to go. Yeah. Wait. … Did you just say. HE JUST He deserted me. SO WAIT, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE? ALRIGHT, WHO THREW A ROCKSTAR IN MY TENT? JEFF Alright, lets go. WHO DID THIS. So what's this place. Lets not let this conversation resurface. This is a 21 Plus Event. What about VIP VIP is 25 Plus. What about that place. Sorry kids. [NO ENTRY] We gotta get in there. So then they wanted an Encore. Did you give them an encore? NO, i was already at my hotel room. Then how did you know that they wanted an encore? WHICH IS IT, THE WYNN, OR THE ENCORE. FUCK, I DON'T REMEMBER. Please, who stays at the Encore for EDC? Have you literally never been out with rich people? No, I literally just got rich. Oh, nice. So, wait, like– Here we go. Dillon Francis has just always been rich? Uh-huh. And Skrillex has always been rich? Yes. Definitely. And deadmau5. deadmau5 is Canadian. OH MY GOD. W E L C O M E I'm going to need your absolute discretion about this. Alright. Sign this waiver. …this is a…pretty heavy packet. I'll wait. I've never signed an NDA like that in my life. Lil' biiiiiiiiiiiiiitzzzz Can we just admit it's weird that we live in an era where “NDA” is household jargon. And like, everyone knows what it means. Everyone knows what an NDA is. I appreciate the sentiments Isn't it weird how it sets in automatically? Autopilot, go. Aww, i don't want to be Autopilot. You're on autopilot. I don't really have to think about it anymore, I'll have to sleep on it Wear a white t-shift, Hear the applause of the audience, Eat it You wanna know what I think? You want to know what I'm drinking? You know what I need? An Icee, (cause I see you typing) An awful Omnipotence A God of Mirages No more carbohydrates, I gotta get all thin; Forgot to acknowledge Whether or not i'm turning this off soon I are. I…”are” I are. Infinite Reality. OH. I. R. IR! IR! IRV I ARE. Suddenly, I remember the taste of talcum powder As If I were Moving backwards In time, Like, Why, God on earth would My mom let me try that, But if i'm honest, Fuck man, I hate deadmau5– There's just too much in here. Beep boop. I love deadmau5. It's so simple. What is this, MATH?! THIS IS AERODYNAMICS. WHAT THE FUCK ARE AERO DYNAMICS DId you mean what you said about that? I meant everything I said. Goddammit, fuck this, I was in the middle of a really complex poem In realtime, listening to deadmau5 Having a partially out of body spiritual experience, Entirely fucking sober FACEPALM BLŪ 8facepalming dramatically in frustration* NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO EXPLAIN ANY OF THIS. beepboop. YO. Oh, I forgot my open form poetry, or my mom How my mom once allowed me to gnaw on talcum powder But who can blame her That was a hard one It was a past life And now ive Got Another One HOly shit what version of the cube is this. 1D. What. You'll get it. Wait. Have you ever stopped for a minute to think– I can't stop for a minute, especially just to “think” [Literally stops for a minute to think.] No fucking way, uh-uh. Come on, man. No. I ain't time travelin' wit deadmau5. Come on– NO. –that someone else has already figured all of this out and that's how any of it is possible in the first place. Alright, i'm gonna need some mind-altering drugs for this. What are you doing. Voluntary Ego Death. I– Wait. Why would you. Get out of my brain. I am your brain. Take care, now. Holy shit, it seems like she's getting more evil. That's because she's definitely more evil ALRIGHT, I'M TIRED OF THIS: WHERE IN THE FUCK IS SKRILLEX. MEANWHILE INT. IN THE FUCK. DAY. *rings doorbell* AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME. I'm not joking, that's…literally the answer to your question. Oh. Fuck. What dude. We gotta go back. I left the keys in the pocket of the guy I shapeshifted into. Are you serious? It's fine, he can't have gone too far, dude. What do you mean he “left the dimension” He entered a portal. He– wait, excuse me. A portal. A “portal”, dude? Yeah; a portal. What do you mean “a portal” A portal, like— you know, like a portal gun, but not a portal gun, just a portal. Uh huh. Excuse us for a second. What the fuck is this dude talking about? I don't know, man. Humans don't use portals! I know man. What the fuck! Well, wait—how do we know that guy is human. He looks human. Yeah dude but, we look human. Duh! Cause we shifted! Yeah, but, how do we know he's not a shifter. Because, dude, I know a shifter when I see one. Yeah, but—you know, what if he's really good. I highly doubt that. Why? Cause I'm the best. No, I am. Exactly, so we'd know if it was another shifter–cause we're the best shifters! Well, let's at least try to see if he knows anything else about those guys. They were together right? I hope not. No, not like that—like Okay, okay, whatever, let's just… Wait, where'd he go? Excuse me. What up. There was just another guy over here just now— He was like—you know—normal looking guy Tie die* shirt Yeah. Did you see him. Yeah, I saw him. Alright, cool, where'd he go? He left. What?! That was fast! Yeah, well…it happens. Are you sure? Yes. *actually is shifter* [as they walk away, the shifter shifts, and then vanishes into a random portal.] Awww, dammit, Now we're never gonna find this guy. Never say never. Whatever, we're dead. We're always dead. Yeah, but like in modern human slang terms Oh, yeah, that. Anyways, I gotta relieve this human's bladder. I fucking hate this species for this. It is useless. *enters portal potty* [ Wait, whatever actually did happen to Dillon Francis? That's great, I was just getting to that. 19 Pages. Nice. …no, 12. What. [11:12] Okay, I'm gonna kill him. Oh, I banished him. With my fists. Nice. Tits. Nice tits. Thx. Hey man. Hey what. Remember that smudge on the lens. Yeah. It just got bigger. … did you try vinegar instead of Windex. Yes. –IT'S NOT A SMUDGE. Did you try Windex with Vinegar. –IT'S NOT A– Shut up. I'm. So. Hungry. Look, do you want this, or not? Do you feel like any of this is a coincidence? Just quit, it. Dillon Francis. WHERE IS IT? I don't know. Lets kick this up a notch. ILLUMINATI What do you want? … I want the full package. ILLUMINATI Okay, I'm gonna need specifics. How do you even get a job as a courier for the illuminati? [INDEED.COM | ILLUMINATI - COURIER- URGENTLY HIRING] Hm. It was a pretty specific list. I don't even get the point of a barbeque if everyone is vegan Well, The Mayor eats fish. Oh please, where is THAT guy the Mayor of? I don't know. We meet in the Matrix. This is for you. Oh. Do you like it? I– It's not a brothel! It's Member's Only! YOu BUY a Membership. Yeah. And WOMEN. HEy, MAN, YOU CAN BUY DUDES, TOO. SHHH. Oh no. What. What did you do? I gave her my credit card. The Heavy One? Yes, and– “AND” –access to the black market. Cool, I got it. Oh, another auction. Of course another auction. What'd you buy this time? A lifesize deadmau5 bobblehead. What are you gonna do with that? Wouldn't you like to know. Ok, gross. LIL BIIIIIIIITXXXX I love a good deamau5 show. He really does have the best fans, It's a comfortable, safe space. Very inviting. Everyone is happy. What the fuck, dude, this place is a sausage fest. Yeah, that's deadmau5 for ya. Hey, I'm looking for this shithead. Oh, that dude? Yeah, have you seen him? Fuck, I wish this never happened. LIL BIIIIITz If you don't know who deadmau6* is– GET OUT. Jk. but seriously this is easily the most devastating person i've ever seen. Maybe just to me, but. Are you sure that's the right guy? Yeah, that's gotta be him. Is he wearing glasses? Ugh. Oh wait. Damn. ‘Fuck, it is my sapiosexuality, I think' Even if it was perhaps an error, as I might have more than needed a new pair of glasses myself, just the thought of Joel in a pair of specables was suddenly and immediately the equivalent of Dillon Francis sitting down at a piano, or Sonny doing just about literally anything–and I realized, finally, that the most indecent things about myself were quite possibly only happening inside my own mind– Okay, my body does really weird things to this dude's music. Are you sure this is real? No. I love this. Just shut up and do your job. What a nightmare. PLease HElP ME. Hm. That can't be right. What. This translates to H E L P M E Oh, shit, I gotta go. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm always working. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm at work. Well, that was nice and all, but–I gotta get out of here. Where are you going? To shoot myself. Wow, that's one hell of a smile. Just–take it. I'm sorry, i can't accept this. What is even happening in this series? Like, a lot WOULD YOU KIDS SETTLE DOWN. *not settling down* *lil biiiiiiiitz* You know what I wonder? I wonder this I'm sober. I'm just sober sally over here. I didn't get sober. I just am. Cause i'd rather face the pain of this harsh reality with a bite than to dull it out and then wake up in the morning Or–just–whenever– To wake up whenever and be like “OH NO, THIS IS WHAT IT'S REALLY LIKE” And the shock of it is so horrible that I just have to repeat that cycle again. ‘OH NOOOOOO” *gets faded* “It's all goooooood” No, it isn't. But i choose to stay like that cause it's like a It's not even a happy medium, It's more like a median-medium But you know what? It makes happier moments more happy And shitter moments less shitty Because i don't have this like drastic spacial Augmented reality or like smoke screen of emotional apathy. I get to feel things way more intensely. I don't have to wonder, ever “oh , did that just happen, cause I was messed up” Or like “would it have happened this way if I was sober” At all. I'm just level– No false sense of Pretty much anything. But i do wonder, though– Like, for people who weren't always sober, and then GOT sober– like , what's the breaking point What's the tip? I always have to sit back and wonder “What did you DO?” Cause you know it had to be something if suddenly “I don't drink anymore” I always wonder, and it's like– no disrespect or anything thing but… I really wanna hear that story. lol . I know you don't wanna tell it (if you can) But wanna hear it. Cause from my point of view. IT's probably hilarious. I know. I'm a dick. Holy shit. What is that. Looks like pasquale went all out with the fireworks this year. …is that a penis? WELCOME HOME It's a giant dick- in-the-sky! GOD IS REAL! JESUS Look, so i've been having second thoughts about this whole thing. What the fuck man. You gotta stop doing shit like this. JESUS I literally can't. I know, but. Okay, look. I'm not writing any of that. You've gotta tell him. NO, RYAN. WELL, WHY NOT. BECAUSE, RYAN. WHY. DEADMAU5 ISN'T REAL. Damn, am I in here. Nice. Of course I am. Well, how'd that happen. This is like a sea of cellphones. Perfect. It was a red car; I wasn't all there, And if you want her, You can have her Fuck. What. I forgot the rest of the verse. It's ok. We gotta move on. No, I gotta go back. For what. For my fans. Aw. What's this. IT's a ceramic mug. Wow, that's nice. I made it Wait. You made that?! Yeah. With your hands?! Yeah. Why would you do that? For you. What. I made it for you? Like, you thought of me first, then you made it? Yeah. WHY? Cause i love you! WOW. Fans are awesome OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *Sometimes. *vomits* … *dies* … *godlessness* [Devastating DJ Moments] I don't get it dawg, all this shit is in your music particles?! “Music particles” UGH. what . That's it. Don't be smart around me. Uh. I'm not smart? No, that won't work; sarcasm is a sign of deeper intelligence. “Sorry” Stop saying that. This is America. S– Don't say it again. Apology not accepted. Don't look at me like that. Like what. With your face. *face* Quick: Say something stupid and random. …I like anime. Oh good, that worked. Thanks. Where are you going? Idk somewhere else. Really, that's it? Yeah. That's all you have to say/ That's literally it. Are you seeing this. Yes. So what's the problem. Oh no, she's stuck in a loop. Throw the whole fan away. [DELETE] Did it work. Did what work. Oh, good. Cool. Wait. See ya later. Did what work? I wish i could just forget about this. Everything? Yeah. Look, this is between me and God–okay? GOD Don't drag me into this. You dragged ME into this! GOD Right. So i could get OUT; So don't drag me back in. Fuck, I remember this. I must have done something important here. Like what. Look, I love you. Great, now what do we do? Bury the body, I guess. *shrugs* Wait, what happened? Somebody dies. OKay, me first. Other Three: Who wants to go next. *still in shock* Fuck man, told you this was a long ass story. *Crying* I'm ruined. What! You went broke? No, i'm still a filthy rich millionaire. I thought you were a billionaire. I am I just *snifs* sometimes I forget that happened. “Sometimes I forget I'm a billionaire” I got to admit, man, I did it to myself. I'm not mad, or anything, but now there's just–certain things I can't do Oh, like what. Not that song. What, why not? You said “anything but Skrillex” this is not Skrillex, this is deadmau5. What's the difference? Okay, that's like saying “What's the difference between deadmau5' and my music?” No, it isn't. How is that not different? That's like comparing the music of Bach and Beethoven to the music of a tattooed hedgehog. You think I look like a hedgehog. No, it's just when I see you and a hedgehog I have all the same thoughts, turn this off. NO, i like this song. Seriously, Dillon Francis, turn it off. I'm gonna turn it up instead. I do not highly recommend doing that. Or at all. This ship has amazing subs. Should I bass boost this song. NO, PROBABLY NOT. Oh, why not? Dillon Francis, I'm warning you, stop. OH HOW COME BECAUSE WHY? BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A HEDEHOG NO, BECAUSE I ALWAYS FALL ASLEEP AT THIS *DROP* [INSTANTLY FALLS ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL–ACTIVATES HYPERSPACE– PLUMMETS SHIP INTO BLACK – HOLE. ohhhhh . What a hoe. Nice, that's a whole episode. Well, here's a bonus scene or whatever. Shazam, what is this. SHAZAM …i don't know. What do you mean you don't know. SHAZAM *panicing* IDONNO WHAT DO YOU MEAN– SHAZAM IDON. NO. OOOOOOOOOOOO Is this deadmau5. I'm not sure. Sounds like deadmau5. It sure does. This is pretty Ooh. it sparkles. yeah , it's deadmau5. How does she KNOW. I need a deadmau5 machine like right now. I know where to find that. Fuck dude, everything's gonna be half-ass until I push out this album. You can't rush it. Trust the process. I can't focus. Oh shit, wasn't this in the last episode? Yeah. I'm still writing backwards. God, what is that, like a pipe organ. WHAT SYNTH IS THIS. Doesn't matter, I just need one. That's it. I know what I'm going to spend my Jimmy Fallons On. And What's that? V.O. OOh. Are we Montaging–to deadmau5? [MONTAGE: deadmau5] Nice. I love a good montage. I love deadmau45* AHH OH NO. I love deadmau5. I keep making typos and I keep forgetting to delete that parallel where. fuckit. That's the synth I've always wanted. It's on sale for $999 At Sam Ash But…you only have Five JImmy Fallons. There are only five special edition in this Volume The Jimmy Fallon 555's I don't know how many volumes there are, but this is the Volume I started keeping track. Fuck, man. I miss Equinox. It's just Eucalyptus. They also have an outdoor running track where you get the best ever view of midtown manhattan. How do you know it's the best ever view of Midtown manhattan. Because it's on a running track. STOP WHISTLING IN MY WHOOP=WHOOPS. The JImmy Fallon 555s are marked with the standard Jimmy Fallon in black ink With a simple side marker of the number 555 in red And also in red, a telephone number on the back. But–that synthesizer is One Thousand Jimmy Fallons. Yeah. So I only need Nine Hundred Ninety Five More. And of course, the Eye of Providence is highlighted. Also Standard. V.O. I always highlight that. Cause, you know… “Illuminati” These are fake. No they're not! They're counterfeit, sorry. No they're not! They're authentic! Why the fuck does this matter so much? You know. What is it with this dude. If it was a snake, it would've bit ya. It was a snake. And it did bite me. He's so increasingly beautiful to me, And I'm still in love with his friend, or misrepresented masterpiece, Progression of a monster, or procession of a superstar, but Something in the story sparks the thought of All we are is consciousness, of course Awkward in body, but of constellations Cosmos, It's not just a corpse; It's all got love in it, Absurd, and sipping carbonated syrup, but I'm just sitting in my stirrups, Here comes galloping a horse, Of course, it hurts to turn it off For just a moment And remember That i'm just a homeless, Stuck and sitting up at night Writing recourse, hugging learning curves in ableton, Curving curses, been reminded that I'm worthless In a thousand words or less, Or just another form of torture, Nothing said, but all that's done Another day another dollar, But it's not It's Jimmy Fallon. I thought this was enter the multiverse. Are you ready to go. No. A hand on my shoulder So paifully socially awkward, I grow stretchmarks, don't know what to call them But scars, But the uglier ones, I've thought Are invisible, Somewhat– To the naked eye Or just anyone Not tiger stripes But one, an eye of horus Carved above my right And inside my lip, (The bottom one) A raised scar in the shape of a sythe I probably died by the hands of a man named Starr So it's hard to shrug it off, And 555 is just a number But it's not It's another scar, It's a punishment For loving him. What's on the back. It's…a number. What number? A telephone number. What. Like a 1-800 Number Call it. I love deadmau5. Something about a big, giant smiling robotic mouse that lights up and sparkles. Why? I don't know. I'm like 5. I see deadmau5 i'm like “WHEEEEEEE” My hands go up in the air “AHHHHHH! YAYYYYY” I'm so stupid. It's so stupid. But you know what? It makes me feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I love it. And by the time I even figured out what deadmau5 was I was so late to the party that I had to make up for lost time. I listened to deadmau5 doing EvErYThING. Everything you could possibly imagine. Well–Except one. Wait, how long have you been cellibate? Forever, probably. Fuck, what happened in here? I don't know. Everything's broken. My head My heart. Everything. Get up, Dillon Francis. Fuck, what happened. You sent us through a black hole. And we crashed on a random ass planet. Fuck, that sucks. YOu suck, Dillon Francis. Ugh. Now get up. Everything's fucked up. SUPERSTAR DJ I'm a paradox. I've got a box of skeletons in my closet i'm not ready to part with. I had a heart attack; I had a heart once, But lately it goes in my pocket; Or my right hand, When I wake up From a dream land, From a long hug From a nice man In a t-shirt KASKADE This is God's PLAN. RYAN, GET FUCKED. 800-799-7233 Did you call the number. Yeah. What is it. [National Domestic Violence Hotline] Woah. That was a long bonus scene. Well, Now here's a PSA. AND A PSA? YES. A PSA. You know what the fucked up thing about all this is, The Legend of Supacree is a true story. All of it. ALL OF IT?! ALL OF IT!? YES. Even the part about– YES. Especially that part. Woah. Damn. I think i'm gonna be sick. Shut up, Dillon Francis. No, but seriously– This is the story of how I got my heart broken so bad. YOU RUINED IT. So, so bad– I HATE YOU. That i started singing about it. NSA, totally *not spying* …are you hearing this. Yes. ILLUMINATI Check this out. Another one down. And how when you start making music– What is this. it's hoe math. And that music actually comes from a really real place. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. really real shit starts happening. You–killed yourself. well , to be fair–I lost everything first. Congratulations. Thx. Here's a skrillex. WHT. Kbye. Really, really, really. What, the fuck Dillon Francis, crawled inside of you to live and made it'self at home? Idon'tknow. What is in this sauce? Just–kill him. What, i can't just. Just kill him, while nobody is watching. Please don't kill me. Shut up, man. I'm having a thought process. Okay, that's it. FUCK DILLON FRANCIS. That's the spirit. THAT IS THE SPIRIT. IT'S THE HOLY SPIRIT. Who the fuck is this. It's–Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ?! JESUS CHRIST i'M BACK, MOTHERFUCKER. Wait, are you claiming that the second coming of the messiah is upon us?! YES. Well,Technically, it's the third. And it's all because of Dillon Francis?! I Please stop this HATE Help YOU. Fuck, dude. I know, huh. What did he DO. The third?! How did we miss that?! Uh, you didn't. [HITLER, being HITLER] (he was mad) Okay, that's it. You can't write any of this. Uh, I can. I just did. Technically, I'm dead: this is just a voiceover It's an 80's style PSA You can't say Hitler was the messiah. That's offensive. Everything is offensive. FUCK YOU DILLON. I'msosorry NOTYETYOU'RENOT. Wait, whatever happened to Skrillex. SKRILLEX is waiting outside of the alleged home of SUPACREE's “distant relatives” Lol is he for real at her mom's house. well , to be fair, he's like–looked everywhere else. Ur right. That was a lot of dimensions. So. like. Fuck, i didn't even have that much coffee. It just goes on forever. [DILLON FRANCIS STILL HAS HOTSAUCE IN HIS PUDGY LITTLE EYES] Good. Cause if I see the pupils, i'm wasting him. You think you can do better than this. Better than this? Yes. Yes. Then do it. Alright, is the PSA over? No, not yet. I gotta say one more thing. What is it? Would you ever have done it, Or would you ever be honest If you had, Handed her a lesson, Or a stretch of the past From the present moment, My heart, and my mind And my lover I present you this honor From now on to nowhere I no longer… Want to be near you Or to know you Or to hear you Or to fear you No longer… Want to feel you Or to touch you Or to have you Or to hold you Or to love you No longer, I no longer want you Devastating, A song stuck in my head for a whole world I wonder how long it would take to go back there A room full of actors, A manager, Never a backpack to wear Just a handful of hats, One director, Eventually producer Just now a showrunner Look at how long that took. I had to wonder what auroras in the north thought of someone like Sonny. They showed me. Now I can love you no longer So much for getting acquainted Funny what age equates to in ageless An infinite wisdom, I dismissed him, Nor, would I believe that he ever would hit her, but Some might belong in such a category Though i carry the marks and the scars Of what my once- husband did to me –but no longer. I haven't a heart in the world left But a broken one, made of amethyst. Fuck off, Dillon Francis. A calculated attack on my psyche. I like it a lot, But i'm fonder of sodom. WHAT. Are you saying you woul actually participate in an orgy! Oh GOD no! Oh, Good, cause– But i'd host one. WHAT. The hedonists are a fun bunch. Oh my God. Though, Nowadays, of course, I haven't the slightest idea what to call them. I saw the future. Well, obviously, if you've headlined EDC you've seen the future. I remember all of it. That must be awful. Why don't you remember it? Because i don't want to. Not at all. I did once. Then what happened? I hated it so much, i forgot. You forgot on purpose. I had to. Love, or Music. …Music. Love, or Fame. Fame. Okay, ouch. Love, or Music? …Love. Okay. Love, or Fame. Love. Okay. Love, or music? … Isn't that the same thing? Hm. Love, or Fame? ….Why do you keep asking me the same question. I beg your pardon? Why beg? I mean– What do you mean? What do you mean? Well, first you asked me, If would rather have Love or Music. Love. Music. Yes. In my mind, those are synonyms. Neither can really exist without the other. Okay, and Fame. Love and Fame are also synonyms– How so? Ugh, I just made this difficult on myself. It was always difficult. It really wasn't. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U. WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Yo My horizontal monster wants ya Could revert to vert, but lets keep Our options open Covert, __ My heart is broken No window open Who left the draft in –motherfucker My heart is broken I need a lover I need a lover Some one to hug me I need a hug, but And– I'm not fit to touch The hem of your garment The tip of your dick or fit enough to be your girlfriend I guess i'll just have to live with that When I have an itch, I scratch it myself I made the assumption you can't, And moved passed it But something's been calling me out, from the past Something's been calling me back to the magic I can't get around that Do you hate me? I can see that I'll just make my way back to the beginning Though I'm envious And i pity her, The both of you really There's nothing left between us except Insanity//Infinity Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written INT. SAM ASH MANHATTAN. DAY. A tiny conga for 90 dollars I could die in here Maybe I am just like you I find my way to the prettiest thing in the room And have my way with it Just for a few minutes Consume it, then move on Saw Madison dancing badly on Madison Avenue It's okay, You're a white girl So everybody loves you Everybody loves you Everybody loves you, no matter what you do. As for me, I can't say when I'm going through But you couldn't do it, Madison That's as bad as being at a standstill at rush out in Manhattan With enough practice I could buy everything in Sam ash And make my own band with it That's the plan at least— But

taking a break to try to stop the coughing. idk sux ppl can just be controlled like that. doing my best to be my best ^.^ gotta smile thru tha gross hacking coughing demon ppl everywhere lol (not cool) :( oh - also go listen to Dillon Francis's new album 'This MixtapE is Fire Too' cuz it is fire (except 2 songs i had to skip) plz don't hurt otherscover your mouthn don't be evil demon ppl thx for listening. peace. -b. [so far in the pregame:] For fear of fire; Best not to wander off, With no back track– Might have forgotten the rest, but It wasn't a poem, or part of a song At least, not yet Fuck man. I really want to sample this. Can't sample deadmau5; he's a bitch about paperwork. You cant technically say that. I mean, I technically didnd't. Just let your fingers do the talking. Ooh, look at that one. What are you doing. Some online shopping. For what. A man-thing. You're better off letting your back end Handle the conversation Then again, When in search of a venue Anything with the proper connections And stereo systems Will do in the moment. What do you want? To get rid of my hiccups. That's it: *huccups* yu-p. Wow, that's– Have you ever thought about just– I've thought about just about everything–that's how you got here. I'm gonna go ahead and admit–there's too much going on in my head. It's a lot. I'm gonna need a nap. GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME. *sheath/ swoard* Is that the sword of skrillex. Yeus. Give it to me. *stabs in thigh* Oooh. Not the balls! fair. Around the world we go Around we go again Here we are Oh no, It's the same song Over and over I'd like you to love to today (I'd love to forget for a moment I haven't) I know before long, we get older and older All wrong, It's the same one, Over and over. Have you seen my butt plugs? NO! GROSS. It's alright. I'll just pick some up on the way. AGGH. Better yet, can you just put in the order on amazon AmAZoN. Yes. (I'm so happy Amazon has anal plugs.) Please stop now. You're being a baby about this–just- You know what. Nevermind. I'll do it myself. Please do that. Siri– Oh my God. Alexa–reorder from Amazon. Come on focus. …hmm…now what was I doing? A B L E T O N *spinning rainbow wheel of doom* …seems like it was something. Come on….FOCUS. Hm. When's the last time you had a marshmello. Flashback: [BONFIRE: Burning The Skrillex] *Also making smores* CUT BACK TO: Like never, I'm vegan. PASQUALE WAKE. UP. Holy shit. It's you again. It's always me. Last time you were like 26. Well, now i'm this age. Wait, how old are you. Wouldn't you like to know. There's a lot of things i'd like to know about you, Pasquale, that's not even near the top of the list. Speaking of “top of the list”-- I do have a lot of things to do today. Oh yeah, what's that? I don't know. A bunch of crap. Speaking of crap– This is a lot of speaking. Happy Birthday. What is this. It's Captain Crunch. Yes it is. What is it doing in my lap. That's your lunch. I–no, it isn't. It is. No, i'm vegan. Well, that's the “happy” part in “happy birthday” No… Yes, actually. This is – It is– Vegan. Damn. Jinx. You owe me a Pererier. Shut up. Or a LaCroix. I'll taka a LaCroix. You're so LA. I guess that makes you Beverly Hills– Or Pacific Palisades. Is that Annexed. It is “LA” What else is in this? No animal product… “Yellow 6” It reads! What happened to yellow 1-5? A whole story. Yes, but not a whole food. “Yellow 6?!” That's the chemical complex you need to find yourself in the right dimension. Exactly. What's wrong with this dimension? What isn't? I'm in it! You're in it! Like I said. What– Just eat it. Ugh– happy trails. *disappears* Ugh. I gave that dude too much money. Fuck, what was I doing again. Deadmau5. Uhm, no i was– Deadmau5. Deadmau5. OOOOOH> YES. I KNOW IT'S YOU, YOU SLIMY MOTHERFUCKER. Stop it. YOU STOP IT. I KNOW IT'S YOU. Who is it? STOP IT. Stop–doing that. I know you're deadmau5. I most certainly am not. I know its you. I have boobs. How did you do this. I did–n't. That's right. Fuck, what happened. Nothin. Now I gotta kill my stupid brother. You have a brother?! SKRILLEX. GET IN HERE. Fuck, run. I gotta go. Go where. Uhm. Somewhere else. DILLON, THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE. IT WAS NEVER FUNNY. (It was funny to me.) God does have a sense of humor. AHAH–AHAHA–HAHAHA. As it turns out, not the absolute best sense of humor. Oh—he's okay! He's okay! No, he's dead. He's definitely dead. But a sense of humor, nonetheless. Fuck man. What did you do to Dillon Francis. Nothing. I just got him drunk On what?! Cyanide? Okay, I don't even know what that is. He's a corpse. –but a pretty one. C'mon. Be serious. I can't. Why not. It's hilarious, kinda. This isn't funny. No, it's hilarious. He earned it. He “earned” it? Well, yes– He is dead. I mean, it's a long story; but he brought it upon himself, honestly. “Honestly” Please. PLease. Please. No, I said. PLEASE. I SAID NO. What's this story. That's ten. I win. Fuck. DILLOn WAkE UP. *smacks* ahah. I think it's working I think he's waking up. He's not waking up. He must be. He's laughing. He's not laughing He said “haha' *smacks* haha . See. *smacks* Mm. This shit smacks HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKKKSSSS. Oh shit, is this the 90s. HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKSSS. *slams* GIMMIE MY HONEY SMACKS. That's it. There's no more. AW, COME ON. Sorry, that's all there is. WHAT. But yu can have captain crunch. I DON'T WANT CAPTAIN CRUNCH. I WANT HONEY SMACKS. I'm sorry, there are no more Honey Smacks. You can have Captain Crunch, or Shredded Wheat. GRAMPA Shredded Wheat is MY favorite. Ugh. Mm. Honey Smacks. I HATE YOU. Be nice to your brother. Lol. Everything about Dillon's eyes makes him devastating. Who plays tiny Dillon? I don't know. There are like nine in the script. It shouldn't be hard to cast. We'll go to utah. Fucking. I hate Utah. WELCOME TO UTAH. Nice. Alright, well, what other grounds are there to cover, here? DILLOn FRANCIS I am not doing this project. Of course you are–it's in your contract. What contract. The one you signed. Which–no–I didn't. But you did. SUNNI BLU I got you a drink. DILLON FRANCIS That looks fruity. SUNNI BLU Try it. DILLON FRANCIS *sips* DILLON FRANCIS CONT'D What's in this. Just– drink it. SUNNI BLU Don't look at me like that. DILLOn FRANCIS Like what. SUNNI BLU Do you need a mirror? DILLON FRANCIS I– SUNNI BLU Look down. DILLON FRANCIS *does* SUNNI BLU *flicking nose* Made you look. haha . DILLOn FRANCIS Wow. [takes drink] SUNNI BLUThat's the spirit. But literally there's a mirror between your feet, if you need one. [there literally is] SUNNI BLU CONT'D The floor is made of mirrors DILLOn FRANCIS *suddenly inebriated* Oh wow. SUNNI BLU The whole club turns into a disco ball. DILLON FRANCIS *suddenly very inebriated* That's–convenient. SUNNI BLU It is. SHIA DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS. If my dreams were not just dreams, everyone in here would have a lawsuit against me. A lot of us do. Carry on, then. SKRILLEX BLAIGH. Oh shit, its you again. I swear to God, I thought I killed this nigga. Are you sure it was him? SKRILLEX !!!! No. Alright, i've almost got it. Almost got what. This whole– thing. Oh. –and–it's gone. Really, that quick. I don't think you understand what's happening. You're right, i don't understand what's happening at all. Oh shit. I'm deadmau5. Nice. Fuck it, lets do some trolling. Alright alright. BUT FIRST, COFFEE. Fuck dude, I don't think I should have anymore coffee. Too late. deadmau5. ok . Deadmau5. Nice. D–0 DOn'T D o THis, I'M WARNING YOU. …. If you open that portal, there's no going back. *opens portal* Now you've done it. *goes into portal* Fuck. *portal closes neatly* *facepalm* *entire series of cosmos collapse in the great distance–time begins to stretch and bend uncontrollably* Come on, just let me lick the balls. NO. I'll give you a cookie. well … OH my GAWD. What. Come here, you have to see this. What the fuck is that. I don't know. Should i pick it up? No, don't touch it! He picked it up. Oh, gross. What is this. I don't know. I think it's fanfiction. Who wrote it. Idk. somefangirl. Fangurl. FaNGiRls. Well, Hey, at least i'm not a groupie. OH COME ON, JUST LET ME SUCK IT. GET AWAY FROM ME. PLEASE. i'LL GIVE YOU $40. -well. NOW, A COMMERCIAL BREAK. Since when does this show have commercials. It doesn't. I want to talk to Jimmy Fallon. That's–not happening. Why not. JIMMY FALLON BECAUSE I HAVE A CONTRACT WITH NBC. There he is– Nice. JIMMY FALLON YOU MOTHERFUCKER. I AM A FAMILY MAN, OKAY. Is that like Family Guy? By Chance?! SETH MCFARLENE (with super long hair) *crossing fingers* I'm hoping so. JIMMY FALLON Not even close! SETH MCFARLENE *snaps* Dammit. Oh, I get it. It's like–The Cofffee run Which “coffee run” THE coffee run. We'll have to admit, it's probably the most watched coffee run of all time. Of all of them. You know what? Fuck it, fire me. I'm doing this show. What?! JImmy. Why on EARTH would you ever agree to something like this. JIMMY FALLON THE COSMIC AVENGER Because–it's my duty. Yo. You know that song that everybody knows? You know the song because everybody knows this song. It goes: Lovin you– is easy cause youre beautiful. do - do- do - do- do- do- do… Yeah. You know that song. But you probably don't know who sings it. I'll tell you who sings it. That song is by an artist called Minnie Ripperton. That's a mouthful. Yeah, one hell of a name, huh. Well, that's the lady who sings the song. It's Minnie Riperton. Now, let me tell you something else you probably don't know: Something I probably wouldn't know if I wasn't a DJ But i know this, because I'm a DJ AND MAYA RUDOLPH WAUT A MINUTE. What the fuck, Maya Rudoph, are you doing in my bathroom at 5 AM It's 1:15 in the afternoon. I'm a DJ. It's 5 AM. That's making sense. I know it is. What's not making sense. Is why you're in my bathroom drinking a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. So it is. *slurps milkshake* *sitting on toilet* *slurps* What do you want. You want to know what I want? Apparently, a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. OK. OK. OK so what. Finish the script. –What? Fuck dude, how does this song sound good every time? Congratulations, you've gone entirely insane. beep-boop . [DJ] B00p beep. [Music Producer] Beep-beep. 0.c. Do not fall dangerously in love; Do not pass go Do not collect $200 Or any of it For any reason, For any of it For any of them Just keep it pushin; Just keep it private Just hold it all in and Do not let go Do not fall in love Do not pass go Do not unload Do not walk Do not cross here Do not It smells like butter. But you're vegan. I know. Do you think you're having a stroke. God, I fucking hope so. GOD You WHAT. I want to die. GOD I thought i heart you right. You heard me right–a THOUSAND times. I want to die. Take me out of this life. GOD Not until you make dubstep. WHAT. GOD You gotta make a grammy-winning dubstep album. I what. GOD Or at least nominated. No, I don't. GOD Beg your pardon. I'm not begging. GOD What are you getting at, hon? Look; Am I not one with the source? GOD Uhm–you are. Alright, Then: everything is everything. GOD Yes. And everyone is everyone. GOD This is true. So i'm Skrillex. GOD Skrillex is Skrillex So I Am. GOD … And I already won a grammy. GOD … Like a bunch of them, right. GOD Uh. So technically– GOD YOu know what. I can't argue with that logic. This isn't ableton. No. This is Logic. What the fuck. That's not Serato. No, that's Rekordbox. What the fuck is this. These are CDJs. There's no hot cues! What the fuck is a “HOT CUE” This is not food. What the fucking sauce. I'm warning you, Pasquale. Get off my lawn. THIS IS MY HOUSE. Your house it is not. *House music starts blasting* *lasers* sprinklers* dancers* WHAT THE FUCK. It's voice activated, I just– How did you do this?! What. WHAT DID YOu DO. AND WHEN. I don't know! I just took the delorean, like you said. You were supposed to find Dillon Francis. I did! The problem was, when I found the right one, he was dead! What? He's dead? Presumably! What do you mean by that!? It's a long story! WELL, HOW LONG? SUNNI BLU About as long as my dick! WHO IS THAT. I told you it's a long story. Well, let me in! Sorry Pasquale. No Can do. What. Why not. Cause you're on a federal watch list. What. Yeah. Sorry. Wait… You should probably leave before the feds get here. What? Unless you want to stay and party on the lawn but–not recommended. This is bizarre. The police arrive, surrounding Pasquale on the yard–moving in to arrest him. WAIT. SUPACREE turns away from the window; inside, a room full of her aliases sit looking somewhat miserably; SUPACREE!!! [Pasquale is handcuffed and i dragged off of the lawn] SUPACREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Careless, Acoustic–deadmau5 SUPACREE pours a bowl of captain crunch, taking one colossal bite and sits down in THE CONTROL ROOM at a large computer console; inhaling from a can of nitrous oxide. I'm the worst DJ ever. SUPACREE places the fames deadmau5 helmet atop her head and begins working at the computer promptly, clicking away; Now is deadmau5 I don't even know what key this song is in. MEOWINGTONS, Alive and well purrs and stretches, then settles atop SUPACREE/deadmau5's lap. This is insane. I don't know what's happening. END CREDITS. V. O. Lovin' You, Minnie Ripperton Carless, deadmau5 idk how i'm gonna mix that. Trust me. Anything can be mixed. Anything. [When it] Turns out, The bottom of your heart Was the tip of the Ice Berg And the whole ship has [s]unk[en], [&] I[t]'s probably ice cold At the bottom of the ocean; I'll tell you where i'm from Why, I'll tell you anything for About one dollar Turns out, I've already got one eye on you; One eye'd sad heart I should probably roll out my art on you [I probably should not] One man bought a kiss, Another, a whole night from her– One man bought a whole farm The other, a Whole Foods Market –and you can't even franchise those Amazon's got a monopoly We were playing for corners of earth, All i got was some kandi, Subscriptions to candidly, Actually, I really liked the tree trial (I think i'll wait a week, sorry) When it turns out The world that you wanted Was actually hours already The dollar you got Was also borrowed And the money they wanted and got Was just actually stolen from someone else They bought all the food up And sold it for profits I promise this avocado Once costs nothing at all But you wanted that car for your daughter She's got a mercedes and don't even drive it My mom, on my honor Of all the garages in Lost Lands, I promise the owner of it was The first to go last, And the last to come home Now he's on his own alter And also the worshiper; How do you go back? Oh, you don't Oh you don't Oh, you don't wanna know that But i was of course, All of your rock bottoms It's bottoms and tops, and We don't let the top fall over, We're counting up crumbs And this muffin costs $24 dollars Pour a whole bottle of coconut water out on the sidewalks For the dead homies Not dead in the general sense But just in the head, the heart, And the soul The homeless are happier at McDonalds Than asking at crossroads and crosswalks For dollars I'd rather spend elsewhere I'll avoid the power struggle at operations for about 18 dollars and 56 sense (Please, keep the pennies) I'm feeling around in my 6th sense that there's Something indecent, or decadent Whichever it is Cause i'm better of with the memory of it Than actually dragging it in. –I'm a cat again. Ouch. Shut up. It HURTS. Of course it hurts, you just had heart surgery without any anistetics. YEah, but to be fair–that was a lot of acid. Yes, but lucily for you– –or, for him– Lucily for us, there's no lethal amount of acid. –Ouch– –Shut up. That we know of. George Washington John Adams Thomas Jefferson James Monroe Nope, can't for the life of me remember the 5th Oh shit, I was wrong Turns out, my memory only can hold three. That's a good number I really wish you'd stop just–showing up like this. I never leave. Then go away. I live here. I know you'd like to think that, but– Okay, I'm going to tell you something but I need you to remain calm. What time is it? I don't care Are we gonna make a movie? Depends; is it gonna make me money. FINE. I don't need anymore information about anything else: only these three. Are you serious? I wish I wasn't. I need you to do this. Look, Timmy–I'm not really into grantng wishes anymore. It always blows back on me. A blowjob. Uh huh. That's why you're bothering me. I–would rather you just pick up the call. Take a message. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like that. Like that. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like this Like that. Like — _____ The urge to eat had suddenly left me I wanted a burrito, (But I want to eat red meat) I've gotta stop thinking in sequences and parentheses Complex lines, and writing in past tense so presently. I probably should eat (But probably shouldn't…) I'm starting to bleed; As if i'd been fasting Perhaps, though I had been But had so indulgently feasted On calories enough to last me Till after today (or even till next week) PAY ATTENTION. Woah, to WHAT. Holy shit, I knew this dude was a psychopath but. This is real. ARE YOU SEEING THIS. I “see” it. I should stop meditating in public. You see this? I know everything about you. Why? I bought it on the internet. What is it. Metadata. That's…flattering. Yeah. Wake up. Why, where are we going? Atlanta. What's in Atlanta? You see this? Yes. Do you know what it is? Uh, it's a– What is it? It's a doll. It's not a doll. Oh, it's not. Gimmie a dollar. -_- It's a poppit. “Dr pimple popper” Ew that's fucking gross. I hate this. Let me see. Does s/he have backne? Yes/No. Great, i'll take it. Fuckit. Okay, I got to “whatever”. You went too far. What? I thought I was supposed to go past “fuckit” Yeah, you go past fuckit, I did that! But if you get to “whatever”, you've gone too far. You've gotta go back. Back to WHAT. There was almost no space between “fuckit” and “whatever” Oh trust me. There is. So? This is how he's been controlling you. And? And!? Has it ever occurred to you that I want to be controlled? What! That it just takes the right person to get that kind of permission– permission to what Permission to ride. … Maybe I gave him the reigns. What horse “gives” its rider the reigns. Who said anything about a horse?! Another Horse Mix. Nice. fuck . FYCK. I told you. You know what…Maybe that's my poppit. What. Maybe. I'm so confused. Oh, good–the reversal spell worked. You did a reversal spell on me? Only after I found out what spell you put on ME–FIRST. Yeah, except I wasn't the first one to use that spell on you. EXACTLY. COPY-CAT. Moo. Aww. I'm a cat. … *face* I mean “meow” That's right. Cat. …moo. *face* Lookie here boys: What is it? –I'm leaving. Oh, you're gonna wanna hear this. What. I found the first “whites only” water fountain since 1962. Okay, what do you want? A deal. Oh, I'll give you a deal. Cash up front. [He presents a one dollar bill] Is this enough. [beat] Where are you going with this? Nowhere, fast. YO. What now, dude. SHE'S ONTO US. I doubt that. Look at this. I highly doubt– *gaaassp* Shenanigans! You know what I like about you, Ariana? Everything. Hah. Hm. You know how to keep a secret. I don't know what you're talking about. Exactly. *rolls eyes, flips hair.* Well, here's another one for you. –Another what? This is how my darkness becomes your darkness. I already have enough on my own. I know. You don't know. Only God knows. MOM! Don't ask me again. This is heavy, Doc. What is it? The soup! It's too heavy. Too much cream? Way too much! I have a meeting! Meeting with who? The Hollywood People. When? Soon–what time is it? I don't know. Dammit! Why don't you have any clocks in your house? I only just recently remembered what a clock was. Oh! Here. [God produces a small pocket watch and presents it to him; it's nearly noon on EARTH; But the two are sharing a meal of course in the famed kitchen of the Creator in the TImeless VOID.] Ah, Jesus Christ! He's not here… I'm gonna be late. Now, now; You know I wouldn't let that happen– [a smug look| Hugs and Kisses. [As they embrace, he disappears into a mist of light and stardust, fading away from the void and into the exterior world; he realizes God has slipped him the watch; he flips it open to reveal the time: it is now 11:44] Amazing. V.O. Now you won't wait so long to visit. [He places the wach in his pocket and walks into the studio] MICHAEL J. FOX has been asked to reprise his role as MARTY MCFLY many times before; But never for a project like this. ____ Meanwhile, What am I going to do with you? [The Festival Project.™] YOU'RE DEAD TO ME! –I'm dead to everyone! Don't do this. You wanted to come to the other side. No, I didn't. We'll you're here anyway; Might as well stay awhile. With eyes like burning fire And saddles for the riders The horse begins to gallop (or the horses, rather) On the mark to beating drums To move them forward faster What the fuck is this. idk. Kx5. *-* !_! Here u go Wat is this. it's a dragon. Oh, thats nice. Ya. Whats it do. Idk. dragon things. ok. Don't put it in ur bathroom. Why. idrk. Hm. † Hey. Ugh–No, Kaskade, go away. It's me, Ryan! No, Get out! I'm No† Ka–k (gags) –skade! Gross! It's just Ryan! I promise! NO. GET OUT. Lmfao. Right. This show is fantastic. Who was that. Fucking–Kaskade again! Are you sure. Ugh. Looks like Ryan. Kaskade is Kaskade. {shrugs] Dudes a creep. “Kaskade Ruins Lives” Is this the same episode as before? Eventually, yes. Wasn't I doing something Are you goona let this go? Um. Well I'm fucked. Why, what happened. Obsidian. That should do Unsobsidian. Okay, i'm fucked, Well, what's this? An Oreo Cookie. I mean, sitting next to it. Oh, its a portal gun. Raves are not just raves– A party is not simply a “party” –These big festivals –they're diversions. –DIstractions. Distractions from what. If you were supposed to know, –you'd know. it wouldn't be so important that you go. Why is it? These ancient rituals… It's occult magic. They've got it down to a science. The government funds this. The government funds everything. WoooooooW. It's not really a secret, if you can google it. ‘-complications.' I'm lost somewhere, gone HIppopatamus feeling quite off in the galaxies, galavanting Gazing at Daisies Aces and spades Gone from Heaven to Hades for days On the A– Adjacent Recently dismantling adjectives, Lampshades and matching curtains God it hurts, every day that I think about you; But how can i be about you when You don't even see me, do you Signature consignments, Wrong environments and irony is, I wasn't invited– –but invented it WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Great, now I have to explain myself. You don't have to. What's this space for? Oh, that's the red room. [The Red Room] Well, obviously, but– But what? What's it for? I don't think anybody should read this. HEY. Participation Only– Oh! No peeking! You ever feel like you're doing too much? Yeah, but not for money. Look, we have them surrounded. Our best course of action is to– deadmau5 . What? No– DEADMAU5. Well, are you sure it was a mouse and not a rat? It was a mouse. I know the difference. Do you, though? Look, I've lived in Mexico and New York City. So. In Queens. Oh. That's mathematically impossible. I mean it's not–impossible. No, it's not just impossible. It's mathematically impossible. Has it ever occurred to you that the DJ World in entirety exists outside of the realm of math and science? What is this. Just–enjoy the rave. No. What is this. Look at the firewoooorkkks! Woo EDC… NO. What is this right here. BEFORE: Hey, you still got that balloon? Yeah. Lemme see it. Dude, what are you doing? …I'mma go catch me a DJ. THIS IS NUTS. I can't feel my face. What do you call this? Collateral Damage. Look, I'm going to have to take frequent trips to the bathroom. ok . And–uhh– and. Uhh– Why did you call me over here. Cause i can. Look. this is not magic. This is not science. This is not “voodoo” Voodoo is magic. It's just music. W H E R E D I D H E G O O O O O I don't know. Fuck dude, I fucked up. Once again– Of course you did. What did you do this time? I might have evaporated someone with my fat fucking bass. Nice. Way to go. Yeah. Wait. … Did you just say. HE JUST He deserted me. SO WAIT, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE? ALRIGHT, WHO THREW A ROCKSTAR IN MY TENT? JEFF Alright, lets go. WHO DID THIS. So what's this place. Lets not let this conversation resurface. This is a 21 Plus Event. What about VIP VIP is 25 Plus. What about that place. Sorry kids. [NO ENTRY] We gotta get in there. So then they wanted an Encore. Did you give them an encore? NO, i was already at my hotel room. Then how did you know that they wanted an encore? WHICH IS IT, THE WYNN, OR THE ENCORE. FUCK, I DON'T REMEMBER. Please, who stays at the Encore for EDC? Have you literally never been out with rich people? No, I literally just got rich. Oh, nice. So, wait, like– Here we go. Dillon Francis has just always been rich? Uh-huh. And Skrillex has always been rich? Yes. Definitely. And deadmau5. deadmau5 is Canadian. OH MY GOD. W E L C O M E I'm going to need your absolute discretion about this. Alright. Sign this waiver. …this is a…pretty heavy packet. I'll wait. I've never signed an NDA like that in my life. Lil' biiiiiiiiiiiiiitzzzz Can we just admit it's weird that we live in an era where “NDA” is household jargon. And like, everyone knows what it means. Everyone knows what an NDA is. I appreciate the sentiments Isn't it weird how it sets in automatically? Autopilot, go. Aww, i don't want to be Autopilot. You're on autopilot. I don't really have to think about it anymore, I'll have to sleep on it Wear a white t-shift, Hear the applause of the audience, Eat it You wanna know what I think? You want to know what I'm drinking? You know what I need? An Icee, (cause I see you typing) An awful Omnipotence A God of Mirages No more carbohydrates, I gotta get all thin; Forgot to acknowledge Whether or not i'm turning this off soon I are. I…”are” I are. Infinite Reality. OH. I. R. IR! IR! IRV I ARE. Suddenly, I remember the taste of talcum powder As If I were Moving backwards In time, Like, Why, God on earth would My mom let me try that, But if i'm honest, Fuck man, I hate deadmau5– There's just too much in here. Beep boop. I love deadmau5. It's so simple. What is this, MATH?! THIS IS AERODYNAMICS. WHAT THE FUCK ARE AERO DYNAMICS DId you mean what you said about that? I meant everything I said. Goddammit, fuck this, I was in the middle of a really complex poem In realtime, listening to deadmau5 Having a partially out of body spiritual experience, Entirely fucking sober FACEPALM BLŪ 8facepalming dramatically in frustration* NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO EXPLAIN ANY OF THIS. beepboop. YO. Oh, I forgot my open form poetry, or my mom How my mom once allowed me to gnaw on talcum powder But who can blame her That was a hard one It was a past life And now ive Got Another One HOly shit what version of the cube is this. 1D. What. You'll get it. Wait. Have you ever stopped for a minute to think– I can't stop for a minute, especially just to “think” [Literally stops for a minute to think.] No fucking way, uh-uh. Come on, man. No. I ain't time travelin' wit deadmau5. Come on– NO. –that someone else has already figured all of this out and that's how any of it is possible in the first place. Alright, i'm gonna need some mind-altering drugs for this. What are you doing. Voluntary Ego Death. I– Wait. Why would you. Get out of my brain. I am your brain. Take care, now. Holy shit, it seems like she's getting more evil. That's because she's definitely more evil ALRIGHT, I'M TIRED OF THIS: WHERE IN THE FUCK IS SKRILLEX. MEANWHILE INT. IN THE FUCK. DAY. *rings doorbell* AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME. I'm not joking, that's…literally the answer to your question. Oh. Fuck. What dude. We gotta go back. I left the keys in the pocket of the guy I shapeshifted into. Are you serious? It's fine, he can't have gone too far, dude. What do you mean he “left the dimension” He entered a portal. He– wait, excuse me. A portal. A “portal”, dude? Yeah; a portal. What do you mean “a portal” A portal, like— you know, like a portal gun, but not a portal gun, just a portal. Uh huh. Excuse us for a second. What the fuck is this dude talking about? I don't know, man. Humans don't use portals! I know man. What the fuck! Well, wait—how do we know that guy is human. He looks human. Yeah dude but, we look human. Duh! Cause we shifted! Yeah, but, how do we know he's not a shifter. Because, dude, I know a shifter when I see one. Yeah, but—you know, what if he's really good. I highly doubt that. Why? Cause I'm the best. No, I am. Exactly, so we'd know if it was another shifter–cause we're the best shifters! Well, let's at least try to see if he knows anything else about those guys. They were together right? I hope not. No, not like that—like Okay, okay, whatever, let's just… Wait, where'd he go? Excuse me. What up. There was just another guy over here just now— He was like—you know—normal looking guy Tie die* shirt Yeah. Did you see him. Yeah, I saw him. Alright, cool, where'd he go? He left. What?! That was fast! Yeah, well…it happens. Are you sure? Yes. *actually is shifter* [as they walk away, the shifter shifts, and then vanishes into a random portal.] Awww, dammit, Now we're never gonna find this guy. Never say never. Whatever, we're dead. We're always dead. Yeah, but like in modern human slang terms Oh, yeah, that. Anyways, I gotta relieve this human's bladder. I fucking hate this species for this. It is useless. *enters portal potty* [ Wait, whatever actually did happen to Dillon Francis? That's great, I was just getting to that. 19 Pages. Nice. …no, 12. What. [11:12] Okay, I'm gonna kill him. Oh, I banished him. With my fists. Nice. Tits. Nice tits. Thx. Hey man. Hey what. Remember that smudge on the lens. Yeah. It just got bigger. … did you try vinegar instead of Windex. Yes. –IT'S NOT A SMUDGE. Did you try Windex with Vinegar. –IT'S NOT A– Shut up. I'm. So. Hungry. Look, do you want this, or not? Do you feel like any of this is a coincidence? Just quit, it. Dillon Francis. WHERE IS IT? I don't know. Lets kick this up a notch. ILLUMINATI What do you want? … I want the full package. ILLUMINATI Okay, I'm gonna need specifics. How do you even get a job as a courier for the illuminati? [INDEED.COM | ILLUMINATI - COURIER- URGENTLY HIRING] Hm. It was a pretty specific list. I don't even get the point of a barbeque if everyone is vegan Well, The Mayor eats fish. Oh please, where is THAT guy the Mayor of? I don't know. We meet in the Matrix. This is for you. Oh. Do you like it? I– It's not a brothel! It's Member's Only! YOu BUY a Membership. Yeah. And WOMEN. HEy, MAN, YOU CAN BUY DUDES, TOO. SHHH. Oh no. What. What did you do? I gave her my credit card. The Heavy One? Yes, and– “AND” –access to the black market. Cool, I got it. Oh, another auction. Of course another auction. What'd you buy this time? A lifesize deadmau5 bobblehead. What are you gonna do with that? Wouldn't you like to know. Ok, gross. LIL BIIIIIIIITXXXX I love a good deamau5 show. He really does have the best fans, It's a comfortable, safe space. Very inviting. Everyone is happy. What the fuck, dude, this place is a sausage fest. Yeah, that's deadmau5 for ya. Hey, I'm looking for this shithead. Oh, that dude? Yeah, have you seen him? Fuck, I wish this never happened. LIL BIIIIITz If you don't know who deadmau6* is– GET OUT. Jk. but seriously this is easily the most devastating person i've ever seen. Maybe just to me, but. Are you sure that's the right guy? Yeah, that's gotta be him. Is he wearing glasses? Ugh. Oh wait. Damn. ‘Fuck, it is my sapiosexuality, I think' Even if it was perhaps an error, as I might have more than needed a new pair of glasses myself, just the thought of Joel in a pair of specables was suddenly and immediately the equivalent of Dillon Francis sitting down at a piano, or Sonny doing just about literally anything–and I realized, finally, that the most indecent things about myself were quite possibly only happening inside my own mind– Okay, my body does really weird things to this dude's music. Are you sure this is real? No. I love this. Just shut up and do your job. What a nightmare. PLease HElP ME. Hm. That can't be right. What. This translates to H E L P M E Oh, shit, I gotta go. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm always working. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm at work. Well, that was nice and all, but–I gotta get out of here. Where are you going? To shoot myself. Wow, that's one hell of a smile. Just–take it. I'm sorry, i can't accept this. What is even happening in this series? Like, a lot WOULD YOU KIDS SETTLE DOWN. *not settling down* *lil biiiiiiiitz* You know what I wonder? I wonder this I'm sober. I'm just sober sally over here. I didn't get sober. I just am. Cause i'd rather face the pain of this harsh reality with a bite than to dull it out and then wake up in the morning Or–just–whenever– To wake up whenever and be like “OH NO, THIS IS WHAT IT'S REALLY LIKE” And the shock of it is so horrible that I just have to repeat that cycle again. ‘OH NOOOOOO” *gets faded* “It's all goooooood” No, it isn't. But i choose to stay like that cause it's like a It's not even a happy medium, It's more like a median-medium But you know what? It makes happier moments more happy And shitter moments less shitty Because i don't have this like drastic spacial Augmented reality or like smoke screen of emotional apathy. I get to feel things way more intensely. I don't have to wonder, ever “oh , did that just happen, cause I was messed up” Or like “would it have happened this way if I was sober” At all. I'm just level– No false sense of Pretty much anything. But i do wonder, though– Like, for people who weren't always sober, and then GOT sober– like , what's the breaking point What's the tip? I always have to sit back and wonder “What did you DO?” Cause you know it had to be something if suddenly “I don't drink anymore” I always wonder, and it's like– no disrespect or anything thing but… I really wanna hear that story. lol . I know you don't wanna tell it (if you can) But wanna hear it. Cause from my point of view. IT's probably hilarious. I know. I'm a dick. Holy shit. What is that. Looks like pasquale went all out with the fireworks this year. …is that a penis? WELCOME HOME It's a giant dick- in-the-sky! GOD IS REAL! JESUS Look, so i've been having second thoughts about this whole thing. What the fuck man. You gotta stop doing shit like this. JESUS I literally can't. I know, but. Okay, look. I'm not writing any of that. You've gotta tell him. NO, RYAN. WELL, WHY NOT. BECAUSE, RYAN. WHY. DEADMAU5 ISN'T REAL. Damn, am I in here. Nice. Of course I am. Well, how'd that happen. This is like a sea of cellphones. Perfect. It was a red car; I wasn't all there, And if you want her, You can have her Fuck. What. I forgot the rest of the verse. It's ok. We gotta move on. No, I gotta go back. For what. For my fans. Aw. What's this. IT's a ceramic mug. Wow, that's nice. I made it Wait. You made that?! Yeah. With your hands?! Yeah. Why would you do that? For you. What. I made it for you? Like, you thought of me first, then you made it? Yeah. WHY? Cause i love you! WOW. Fans are awesome OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *Sometimes. *vomits* … *dies* … *godlessness* [Devastating DJ Moments] I don't get it dawg, all this shit is in your music particles?! “Music particles” UGH. what . That's it. Don't be smart around me. Uh. I'm not smart? No, that won't work; sarcasm is a sign of deeper intelligence. “Sorry” Stop saying that. This is America. S– Don't say it again. Apology not accepted. Don't look at me like that. Like what. With your face. *face* Quick: Say something stupid and random. …I like anime. Oh good, that worked. Thanks. Where are you going? Idk somewhere else. Really, that's it? Yeah. That's all you have to say/ That's literally it. Are you seeing this. Yes. So what's the problem. Oh no, she's stuck in a loop. Throw the whole fan away. [DELETE] Did it work. Did what work. Oh, good. Cool. Wait. See ya later. Did what work? I wish i could just forget about this. Everything? Yeah. Look, this is between me and God–okay? GOD Don't drag me into this. You dragged ME into this! GOD Right. So i could get OUT; So don't drag me back in. Fuck, I remember this. I must have done something important here. Like what. Look, I love you. Great, now what do we do? Bury the body, I guess. *shrugs* Wait, what happened? Somebody dies. OKay, me first. Other Three: Who wants to go next. *still in shock* Fuck man, told you this was a long ass story. *Crying* I'm ruined. What! You went broke? No, i'm still a filthy rich millionaire. I thought you were a billionaire. I am I just *snifs* sometimes I forget that happened. “Sometimes I forget I'm a billionaire” I got to admit, man, I did it to myself. I'm not mad, or anything, but now there's just–certain things I can't do Oh, like what. Not that song. What, why not? You said “anything but Skrillex” this is not Skrillex, this is deadmau5. What's the difference? Okay, that's like saying “What's the difference between deadmau5' and my music?” No, it isn't. How is that not different? That's like comparing the music of Bach and Beethoven to the music of a tattooed hedgehog. You think I look like a hedgehog. No, it's just when I see you and a hedgehog I have all the same thoughts, turn this off. NO, i like this song. Seriously, Dillon Francis, turn it off. I'm gonna turn it up instead. I do not highly recommend doing that. Or at all. This ship has amazing subs. Should I bass boost this song. NO, PROBABLY NOT. Oh, why not? Dillon Francis, I'm warning you, stop. OH HOW COME BECAUSE WHY? BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A HEDEHOG NO, BECAUSE I ALWAYS FALL ASLEEP AT THIS *DROP* [INSTANTLY FALLS ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL–ACTIVATES HYPERSPACE– PLUMMETS SHIP INTO BLACK – HOLE. ohhhhh . What a hoe. Nice, that's a whole episode. Well, here's a bonus scene or whatever. Shazam, what is this. SHAZAM …i don't know. What do you mean you don't know. SHAZAM *panicing* IDONNO WHAT DO YOU MEAN– SHAZAM IDON. NO. OOOOOOOOOOOO Is this deadmau5. I'm not sure. Sounds like deadmau5. It sure does. This is pretty Ooh. it sparkles. yeah , it's deadmau5. How does she KNOW. I need a deadmau5 machine like right now. I know where to find that. Fuck dude, everything's gonna be half-ass until I push out this album. You can't rush it. Trust the process. I can't focus. Oh shit, wasn't this in the last episode? Yeah. I'm still writing backwards. God, what is that, like a pipe organ. WHAT SYNTH IS THIS. Doesn't matter, I just need one. That's it. I know what I'm going to spend my Jimmy Fallons On. And What's that? V.O. OOh. Are we Montaging–to deadmau5? [MONTAGE: deadmau5] Nice. I love a good montage. I love deadmau45* AHH OH NO. I love deadmau5. I keep making typos and I keep forgetting to delete that parallel where. fuckit. That's the synth I've always wanted. It's on sale for $999 At Sam Ash But…you only have Five JImmy Fallons. There are only five special edition in this Volume The Jimmy Fallon 555's I don't know how many volumes there are, but this is the Volume I started keeping track. Fuck, man. I miss Equinox. It's just Eucalyptus. They also have an outdoor running track where you get the best ever view of midtown manhattan. How do you know it's the best ever view of Midtown manhattan. Because it's on a running track. STOP WHISTLING IN MY WHOOP=WHOOPS. The JImmy Fallon 555s are marked with the standard Jimmy Fallon in black ink With a simple side marker of the number 555 in red And also in red, a telephone number on the back. But–that synthesizer is One Thousand Jimmy Fallons. Yeah. So I only need Nine Hundred Ninety Five More. And of course, the Eye of Providence is highlighted. Also Standard. V.O. I always highlight that. Cause, you know… “Illuminati” These are fake. No they're not! They're counterfeit, sorry. No they're not! They're authentic! Why the fuck does this matter so much? You know. What is it with this dude. If it was a snake, it would've bit ya. It was a snake. And it did bite me. He's so increasingly beautiful to me, And I'm still in love with his friend, or misrepresented masterpiece, Progression of a monster, or procession of a superstar, but Something in the story sparks the thought of All we are is consciousness, of course Awkward in body, but of constellations Cosmos, It's not just a corpse; It's all got love in it, Absurd, and sipping carbonated syrup, but I'm just sitting in my stirrups, Here comes galloping a horse, Of course, it hurts to turn it off For just a moment And remember That i'm just a homeless, Stuck and sitting up at night Writing recourse, hugging learning curves in ableton, Curving curses, been reminded that I'm worthless In a thousand words or less, Or just another form of torture, Nothing said, but all that's done Another day another dollar, But it's not It's Jimmy Fallon. I thought this was enter the multiverse. Are you ready to go. No. A hand on my shoulder So paifully socially awkward, I grow stretchmarks, don't know what to call them But scars, But the uglier ones, I've thought Are invisible, Somewhat– To the naked eye Or just anyone Not tiger stripes But one, an eye of horus Carved above my right And inside my lip, (The bottom one) A raised scar in the shape of a sythe I probably died by the hands of a man named Starr So it's hard to shrug it off, And 555 is just a number But it's not It's another scar, It's a punishment For loving him. What's on the back. It's…a number. What number? A telephone number. What. Like a 1-800 Number Call it. I love deadmau5. Something about a big, giant smiling robotic mouse that lights up and sparkles. Why? I don't know. I'm like 5. I see deadmau5 i'm like “WHEEEEEEE” My hands go up in the air “AHHHHHH! YAYYYYY” I'm so stupid. It's so stupid. But you know what? It makes me feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I love it. And by the time I even figured out what deadmau5 was I was so late to the party that I had to make up for lost time. I listened to deadmau5 doing EvErYThING. Everything you could possibly imagine. Well–Except one. Wait, how long have you been cellibate? Forever, probably. Fuck, what happened in here? I don't know. Everything's broken. My head My heart. Everything. Get up, Dillon Francis. Fuck, what happened. You sent us through a black hole. And we crashed on a random ass planet. Fuck, that sucks. YOu suck, Dillon Francis. Ugh. Now get up. Everything's fucked up. SUPERSTAR DJ I'm a paradox. I've got a box of skeletons in my closet i'm not ready to part with. I had a heart attack; I had a heart once, But lately it goes in my pocket; Or my right hand, When I wake up From a dream land, From a long hug From a nice man In a t-shirt KASKADE This is God's PLAN. RYAN, GET FUCKED. 800-799-7233 Did you call the number. Yeah. What is it. [National Domestic Violence Hotline] Woah. That was a long bonus scene. Well, Now here's a PSA. AND A PSA? YES. A PSA. You know what the fucked up thing about all this is, The Legend of Supacree is a true story. All of it. ALL OF IT?! ALL OF IT!? YES. Even the part about– YES. Especially that part. Woah. Damn. I think i'm gonna be sick. Shut up, Dillon Francis. No, but seriously– This is the story of how I got my heart broken so bad. YOU RUINED IT. So, so bad– I HATE YOU. That i started singing about it. NSA, totally *not spying* …are you hearing this. Yes. ILLUMINATI Check this out. Another one down. And how when you start making music– What is this. it's hoe math. And that music actually comes from a really real place. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. really real shit starts happening. You–killed yourself. well , to be fair–I lost everything first. Congratulations. Thx. Here's a skrillex. WHT. Kbye. Really, really, really. What, the fuck Dillon Francis, crawled inside of you to live and made it'self at home? Idon'tknow. What is in this sauce? Just–kill him. What, i can't just. Just kill him, while nobody is watching. Please don't kill me. Shut up, man. I'm having a thought process. Okay, that's it. FUCK DILLON FRANCIS. That's the spirit. THAT IS THE SPIRIT. IT'S THE HOLY SPIRIT. Who the fuck is this. It's–Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ?! JESUS CHRIST i'M BACK, MOTHERFUCKER. Wait, are you claiming that the second coming of the messiah is upon us?! YES. Well,Technically, it's the third. And it's all because of Dillon Francis?! I Please stop this HATE Help YOU. Fuck, dude. I know, huh. What did he DO. The third?! How did we miss that?! Uh, you didn't. [HITLER, being HITLER] (he was mad) Okay, that's it. You can't write any of this. Uh, I can. I just did. Technically, I'm dead: this is just a voiceover It's an 80's style PSA You can't say Hitler was the messiah. That's offensive. Everything is offensive. FUCK YOU DILLON. I'msosorry NOTYETYOU'RENOT. Wait, whatever happened to Skrillex. SKRILLEX is waiting outside of the alleged home of SUPACREE's “distant relatives” Lol is he for real at her mom's house. well , to be fair, he's like–looked everywhere else. Ur right. That was a lot of dimensions. So. like. Fuck, i didn't even have that much coffee. It just goes on forever. [DILLON FRANCIS STILL HAS HOTSAUCE IN HIS PUDGY LITTLE EYES] Good. Cause if I see the pupils, i'm wasting him. You think you can do better than this. Better than this? Yes. Yes. Then do it. Alright, is the PSA over? No, not yet. I gotta say one more thing. What is it? Would you ever have done it, Or would you ever be honest If you had, Handed her a lesson, Or a stretch of the past From the present moment, My heart, and my mind And my lover I present you this honor From now on to nowhere I no longer… Want to be near you Or to know you Or to hear you Or to fear you No longer… Want to feel you Or to touch you Or to have you Or to hold you Or to love you No longer, I no longer want you Devastating, A song stuck in my head for a whole world I wonder how long it would take to go back there A room full of actors, A manager, Never a backpack to wear Just a handful of hats, One director, Eventually producer Just now a showrunner Look at how long that took. I had to wonder what auroras in the north thought of someone like Sonny. They showed me. Now I can love you no longer So much for getting acquainted Funny what age equates to in ageless An infinite wisdom, I dismissed him, Nor, would I believe that he ever would hit her, but Some might belong in such a category Though i carry the marks and the scars Of what my once- husband did to me –but no longer. I haven't a heart in the world left But a broken one, made of amethyst. Fuck off, Dillon Francis. A calculated attack on my psyche. I like it a lot, But i'm fonder of sodom. WHAT. Are you saying you woul actually participate in an orgy! Oh GOD no! Oh, Good, cause– But i'd host one. WHAT. The hedonists are a fun bunch. Oh my God. Though, Nowadays, of course, I haven't the slightest idea what to call them. I saw the future. Well, obviously, if you've headlined EDC you've seen the future. I remember all of it. That must be awful. Why don't you remember it? Because i don't want to. Not at all. I did once. Then what happened? I hated it so much, i forgot. You forgot on purpose. I had to. Love, or Music. …Music. Love, or Fame. Fame. Okay, ouch. Love, or Music? …Love. Okay. Love, or Fame. Love. Okay. Love, or music? … Isn't that the same thing? Hm. Love, or Fame? ….Why do you keep asking me the same question. I beg your pardon? Why beg? I mean– What do you mean? What do you mean? Well, first you asked me, If would rather have Love or Music. Love. Music. Yes. In my mind, those are synonyms. Neither can really exist without the other. Okay, and Fame. Love and Fame are also synonyms– How so? Ugh, I just made this difficult on myself. It was always difficult. It really wasn't. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U. WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Yo My horizontal monster wants ya Could revert to vert, but lets keep Our options open Covert, __ My heart is broken No window open Who left the draft in –motherfucker My heart is broken I need a lover I need a lover Some one to hug me I need a hug, but And– I'm not fit to touch The hem of your garment The tip of your dick or fit enough to be your girlfriend I guess i'll just have to live with that When I have an itch, I scratch it myself I made the assumption you can't, And moved passed it But something's been calling me out, from the past Something's been calling me back to the magic I can't get around that Do you hate me? I can see that I'll just make my way back to the beginning Though I'm envious And i pity her, The both of you really There's nothing left between us except Insanity//Infinity Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written INT. SAM ASH MANHATTAN. DAY. A tiny conga for 90 dollars I could die in here Maybe I am just like you I find my way to the prettiest thing in the room And have my way with it Just for a few minutes Consume it, then move on Saw Madison dancing badly on Madison Avenue It's okay, You're a white girl So everybody loves you Everybody loves you Everybody loves you, no matter what you do. As for me, I can't say when I'm going through But you couldn't do it, Madison That's as bad as being at a standstill at rush out in Manhattan With enough practice I could buy everything in Sam ash And make my own band with it That's the plan at least— But

[The Legend Returns] Really Bad Mixtape (Might as well get it out of the way now) Killst_rr (Instrumental) Sleep Deprivation Sequence You're not you when you're not you. Hoe_math Exactly what it sounds like. [UnderWorld.] R-R 1 -rarity. [i Come Undone.] AtPLAY Live Mix [Autopilot.] {A Star Is Born.} For fear of fire; Best not to wander off, With no back track– Might have forgotten the rest, but It wasn't a poem, or part of a song At least, not yet Fuck man. I really want to sample this. Can't sample deadmau5; he's a bitch about paperwork. You cant technically say that. I mean, I technically didnd't. Just let your fingers do the talking. Ooh, look at that one. What are you doing. Some online shopping. For what. A man-thing. You're better off letting your back end Handle the conversation Then again, When in search of a venue Anything with the proper connections And stereo systems Will do in the moment. What do you want? To get rid of my hiccups. That's it: *huccups* yu-p. Wow, that's– Have you ever thought about just– I've thought about just about everything–that's how you got here. I'm gonna go ahead and admit–there's too much going on in my head. It's a lot. I'm gonna need a nap. GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME. *sheath/ swoard* Is that the sword of skrillex. Yeus. Give it to me. *stabs in thigh* Oooh. Not the balls! fair. Around the world we go Around we go again Here we are Oh no, It's the same song Over and over I'd like you to love to today (I'd love to forget for a moment I haven't) I know before long, we get older and older All wrong, It's the same one, Over and over. Have you seen my butt plugs? NO! GROSS. It's alright. I'll just pick some up on the way. AGGH. Better yet, can you just put in the order on amazon AmAZoN. Yes. (I'm so happy Amazon has anal plugs.) Please stop now. You're being a baby about this–just- You know what. Nevermind. I'll do it myself. Please do that. Siri– Oh my God. Alexa–reorder from Amazon. Come on focus. …hmm…now what was I doing? A B L E T O N *spinning rainbow wheel of doom* …seems like it was something. Come on….FOCUS. Hm. When's the last time you had a marshmello. Flashback: [BONFIRE: Burning The Skrillex] *Also making smores* CUT BACK TO: Like never, I'm vegan. PASQUALE WAKE. UP. Holy shit. It's you again. It's always me. Last time you were like 26. Well, now i'm this age. Wait, how old are you. Wouldn't you like to know. There's a lot of things i'd like to know about you, Pasquale, that's not even near the top of the list. Speaking of “top of the list”-- I do have a lot of things to do today. Oh yeah, what's that? I don't know. A bunch of crap. Speaking of crap– This is a lot of speaking. Happy Birthday. What is this. It's Captain Crunch. Yes it is. What is it doing in my lap. That's your lunch. I–no, it isn't. It is. No, i'm vegan. Well, that's the “happy” part in “happy birthday” No… Yes, actually. This is – It is– Vegan. Damn. Jinx. You owe me a Pererier. Shut up. Or a LaCroix. I'll taka a LaCroix. You're so LA. I guess that makes you Beverly Hills– Or Pacific Palisades. Is that Annexed. It is “LA” What else is in this? No animal product… “Yellow 6” It reads! What happened to yellow 1-5? A whole story. Yes, but not a whole food. “Yellow 6?!” That's the chemical complex you need to find yourself in the right dimension. Exactly. What's wrong with this dimension? What isn't? I'm in it! You're in it! Like I said. What– Just eat it. Ugh– happy trails. *disappears* Ugh. I gave that dude too much money. Fuck, what was I doing again. Deadmau5. Uhm, no i was– Deadmau5. Deadmau5. OOOOOH> YES. I KNOW IT'S YOU, YOU SLIMY MOTHERFUCKER. Stop it. YOU STOP IT. I KNOW IT'S YOU. Who is it? STOP IT. Stop–doing that. I know you're deadmau5. I most certainly am not. I know its you. I have boobs. How did you do this. I did–n't. That's right. Fuck, what happened. Nothin. Now I gotta kill my stupid brother. You have a brother?! SKRILLEX. GET IN HERE. Fuck, run. I gotta go. Go where. Uhm. Somewhere else. DILLON, THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE. IT WAS NEVER FUNNY. (It was funny to me.) God does have a sense of humor. AHAH–AHAHA–HAHAHA. As it turns out, not the absolute best sense of humor. Oh—he's okay! He's okay! No, he's dead. He's definitely dead. But a sense of humor, nonetheless. Fuck man. What did you do to Dillon Francis. Nothing. I just got him drunk On what?! Cyanide? Okay, I don't even know what that is. He's a corpse. –but a pretty one. C'mon. Be serious. I can't. Why not. It's hilarious, kinda. This isn't funny. No, it's hilarious. He earned it. He “earned” it? Well, yes– He is dead. I mean, it's a long story; but he brought it upon himself, honestly. “Honestly” Please. PLease. Please. No, I said. PLEASE. I SAID NO. What's this story. That's ten. I win. Fuck. DILLOn WAkE UP. *smacks* ahah. I think it's working I think he's waking up. He's not waking up. He must be. He's laughing. He's not laughing He said “haha' *smacks* haha . See. *smacks* Mm. This shit smacks HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKKKSSSS. Oh shit, is this the 90s. HONEY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKSSS. *slams* GIMMIE MY HONEY SMACKS. That's it. There's no more. AW, COME ON. Sorry, that's all there is. WHAT. But yu can have captain crunch. I DON'T WANT CAPTAIN CRUNCH. I WANT HONEY SMACKS. I'm sorry, there are no more Honey Smacks. You can have Captain Crunch, or Shredded Wheat. GRAMPA Shredded Wheat is MY favorite. Ugh. Mm. Honey Smacks. I HATE YOU. Be nice to your brother. Lol. Everything about Dillon's eyes makes him devastating. Who plays tiny Dillon? I don't know. There are like nine in the script. It shouldn't be hard to cast. We'll go to utah. Fucking. I hate Utah. WELCOME TO UTAH. Nice. Alright, well, what other grounds are there to cover, here? DILLOn FRANCIS I am not doing this project. Of course you are–it's in your contract. What contract. The one you signed. Which–no–I didn't. But you did. SUNNI BLU I got you a drink. DILLON FRANCIS That looks fruity. SUNNI BLU Try it. DILLON FRANCIS *sips* DILLON FRANCIS CONT'D What's in this. Just– drink it. SUNNI BLU Don't look at me like that. DILLOn FRANCIS Like what. SUNNI BLU Do you need a mirror? DILLON FRANCIS I– SUNNI BLU Look down. DILLON FRANCIS *does* SUNNI BLU *flicking nose* Made you look. haha . DILLOn FRANCIS Wow. [takes drink] SUNNI BLUThat's the spirit. But literally there's a mirror between your feet, if you need one. [there literally is] SUNNI BLU CONT'D The floor is made of mirrors DILLOn FRANCIS *suddenly inebriated* Oh wow. SUNNI BLU The whole club turns into a disco ball. DILLON FRANCIS *suddenly very inebriated* That's–convenient. SUNNI BLU It is. SHIA DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS. If my dreams were not just dreams, everyone in here would have a lawsuit against me. A lot of us do. Carry on, then. SKRILLEX BLAIGH. Oh shit, its you again. I swear to God, I thought I killed this nigga. Are you sure it was him? SKRILLEX !!!! No. Alright, i've almost got it. Almost got what. This whole– thing. Oh. –and–it's gone. Really, that quick. I don't think you understand what's happening. You're right, i don't understand what's happening at all. Oh shit. I'm deadmau5. Nice. Fuck it, lets do some trolling. Alright alright. BUT FIRST, COFFEE. Fuck dude, I don't think I should have anymore coffee. Too late. deadmau5. ok . Deadmau5. Nice. D–0 DOn'T D o THis, I'M WARNING YOU. …. If you open that portal, there's no going back. *opens portal* Now you've done it. *goes into portal* Fuck. *portal closes neatly* *facepalm* *entire series of cosmos collapse in the great distance–time begins to stretch and bend uncontrollably* Come on, just let me lick the balls. NO. I'll give you a cookie. well … OH my GAWD. What. Come here, you have to see this. What the fuck is that. I don't know. Should i pick it up? No, don't touch it! He picked it up. Oh, gross. What is this. I don't know. I think it's fanfiction. Who wrote it. Idk. somefangirl. Fangurl. FaNGiRls. Well, Hey, at least i'm not a groupie. OH COME ON, JUST LET ME SUCK IT. GET AWAY FROM ME. PLEASE. i'LL GIVE YOU $40. -well. NOW, A COMMERCIAL BREAK. Since when does this show have commercials. It doesn't. I want to talk to Jimmy Fallon. That's–not happening. Why not. JIMMY FALLON BECAUSE I HAVE A CONTRACT WITH NBC. There he is– Nice. JIMMY FALLON YOU MOTHERFUCKER. I AM A FAMILY MAN, OKAY. Is that like Family Guy? By Chance?! SETH MCFARLENE (with super long hair) *crossing fingers* I'm hoping so. JIMMY FALLON Not even close! SETH MCFARLENE *snaps* Dammit. Oh, I get it. It's like–The Cofffee run Which “coffee run” THE coffee run. We'll have to admit, it's probably the most watched coffee run of all time. Of all of them. You know what? Fuck it, fire me. I'm doing this show. What?! JImmy. Why on EARTH would you ever agree to something like this. JIMMY FALLON THE COSMIC AVENGER Because–it's my duty. Yo. You know that song that everybody knows? You know the song because everybody knows this song. It goes: Lovin you– is easy cause youre beautiful. do - do- do - do- do- do- do… Yeah. You know that song. But you probably don't know who sings it. I'll tell you who sings it. That song is by an artist called Minnie Ripperton. That's a mouthful. Yeah, one hell of a name, huh. Well, that's the lady who sings the song. It's Minnie Riperton. Now, let me tell you something else you probably don't know: Something I probably wouldn't know if I wasn't a DJ But i know this, because I'm a DJ AND MAYA RUDOLPH WAUT A MINUTE. What the fuck, Maya Rudoph, are you doing in my bathroom at 5 AM It's 1:15 in the afternoon. I'm a DJ. It's 5 AM. That's making sense. I know it is. What's not making sense. Is why you're in my bathroom drinking a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. So it is. *slurps milkshake* *sitting on toilet* *slurps* What do you want. You want to know what I want? Apparently, a milkshake. It's a strawberry milkshake. OK. OK. OK so what. Finish the script. –What? Fuck dude, how does this song sound good every time? Congratulations, you've gone entirely insane. beep-boop . [DJ] B00p beep. [Music Producer] Beep-beep. 0.c. Do not fall dangerously in love; Do not pass go Do not collect $200 Or any of it For any reason, For any of it For any of them Just keep it pushin; Just keep it private Just hold it all in and Do not let go Do not fall in love Do not pass go Do not unload Do not walk Do not cross here Do not It smells like butter. But you're vegan. I know. Do you think you're having a stroke. God, I fucking hope so. GOD You WHAT. I want to die. GOD I thought i heart you right. You heard me right–a THOUSAND times. I want to die. Take me out of this life. GOD Not until you make dubstep. WHAT. GOD You gotta make a grammy-winning dubstep album. I what. GOD Or at least nominated. No, I don't. GOD Beg your pardon. I'm not begging. GOD What are you getting at, hon? Look; Am I not one with the source? GOD Uhm–you are. Alright, Then: everything is everything. GOD Yes. And everyone is everyone. GOD This is true. So i'm Skrillex. GOD Skrillex is Skrillex So I Am. GOD … And I already won a grammy. GOD … Like a bunch of them, right. GOD Uh. So technically– GOD YOu know what. I can't argue with that logic. This isn't ableton. No. This is Logic. What the fuck. That's not Serato. No, that's Rekordbox. What the fuck is this. These are CDJs. There's no hot cues! What the fuck is a “HOT CUE” This is not food. What the fucking sauce. I'm warning you, Pasquale. Get off my lawn. THIS IS MY HOUSE. Your house it is not. *House music starts blasting* *lasers* sprinklers* dancers* WHAT THE FUCK. It's voice activated, I just– How did you do this?! What. WHAT DID YOu DO. AND WHEN. I don't know! I just took the delorean, like you said. You were supposed to find Dillon Francis. I did! The problem was, when I found the right one, he was dead! What? He's dead? Presumably! What do you mean by that!? It's a long story! WELL, HOW LONG? SUNNI BLU About as long as my dick! WHO IS THAT. I told you it's a long story. Well, let me in! Sorry Pasquale. No Can do. What. Why not. Cause you're on a federal watch list. What. Yeah. Sorry. Wait… You should probably leave before the feds get here. What? Unless you want to stay and party on the lawn but–not recommended. This is bizarre. The police arrive, surrounding Pasquale on the yard–moving in to arrest him. WAIT. SUPACREE turns away from the window; inside, a room full of her aliases sit looking somewhat miserably; SUPACREE!!! [Pasquale is handcuffed and i dragged off of the lawn] SUPACREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Careless, Acoustic–deadmau5 SUPACREE pours a bowl of captain crunch, taking one colossal bite and sits down in THE CONTROL ROOM at a large computer console; inhaling from a can of nitrous oxide. I'm the worst DJ ever. SUPACREE places the fames deadmau5 helmet atop her head and begins working at the computer promptly, clicking away; Now is deadmau5 I don't even know what key this song is in. MEOWINGTONS, Alive and well purrs and stretches, then settles atop SUPACREE/deadmau5's lap. This is insane. I don't know what's happening. END CREDITS. V. O. Lovin' You, Minnie Ripperton Carless, deadmau5 idk how i'm gonna mix that. Trust me. Anything can be mixed. Anything. [When it] Turns out, The bottom of your heart Was the tip of the Ice Berg And the whole ship has [s]unk[en], [&] I[t]'s probably ice cold At the bottom of the ocean; I'll tell you where i'm from Why, I'll tell you anything for About one dollar Turns out, I've already got one eye on you; One eye'd sad heart I should probably roll out my art on you [I probably should not] One man bought a kiss, Another, a whole night from her– One man bought a whole farm The other, a Whole Foods Market –and you can't even franchise those Amazon's got a monopoly We were playing for corners of earth, All i got was some kandi, Subscriptions to candidly, Actually, I really liked the tree trial (I think i'll wait a week, sorry) When it turns out The world that you wanted Was actually hours already The dollar you got Was also borrowed And the money they wanted and got Was just actually stolen from someone else They bought all the food up And sold it for profits I promise this avocado Once costs nothing at all But you wanted that car for your daughter She's got a mercedes and don't even drive it My mom, on my honor Of all the garages in Lost Lands, I promise the owner of it was The first to go last, And the last to come home Now he's on his own alter And also the worshiper; How do you go back? Oh, you don't Oh you don't Oh, you don't wanna know that But i was of course, All of your rock bottoms It's bottoms and tops, and We don't let the top fall over, We're counting up crumbs And this muffin costs $24 dollars Pour a whole bottle of coconut water out on the sidewalks For the dead homies Not dead in the general sense But just in the head, the heart, And the soul The homeless are happier at McDonalds Than asking at crossroads and crosswalks For dollars I'd rather spend elsewhere I'll avoid the power struggle at operations for about 18 dollars and 56 sense (Please, keep the pennies) I'm feeling around in my 6th sense that there's Something indecent, or decadent Whichever it is Cause i'm better of with the memory of it Than actually dragging it in. –I'm a cat again. Ouch. Shut up. It HURTS. Of course it hurts, you just had heart surgery without any anistetics. YEah, but to be fair–that was a lot of acid. Yes, but lucily for you– –or, for him– Lucily for us, there's no lethal amount of acid. –Ouch– –Shut up. That we know of. George Washington John Adams Thomas Jefferson James Monroe Nope, can't for the life of me remember the 5th Oh shit, I was wrong Turns out, my memory only can hold three. That's a good number I really wish you'd stop just–showing up like this. I never leave. Then go away. I live here. I know you'd like to think that, but– Okay, I'm going to tell you something but I need you to remain calm. What time is it? I don't care Are we gonna make a movie? Depends; is it gonna make me money. FINE. I don't need anymore information about anything else: only these three. Are you serious? I wish I wasn't. I need you to do this. Look, Timmy–I'm not really into grantng wishes anymore. It always blows back on me. A blowjob. Uh huh. That's why you're bothering me. I–would rather you just pick up the call. Take a message. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like that. Like that. I like ‘em like this. I like ‘em like that. I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. And I like ‘em like this. –and I like ‘em like that. Mmm like this Like that. Like — _____ The urge to eat had suddenly left me I wanted a burrito, (But I want to eat red meat) I've gotta stop thinking in sequences and parentheses Complex lines, and writing in past tense so presently. I probably should eat (But probably shouldn't…) I'm starting to bleed; As if i'd been fasting Perhaps, though I had been But had so indulgently feasted On calories enough to last me Till after today (or even till next week) PAY ATTENTION. Woah, to WHAT. Holy shit, I knew this dude was a psychopath but. This is real. ARE YOU SEEING THIS. I “see” it. I should stop meditating in public. You see this? I know everything about you. Why? I bought it on the internet. What is it. Metadata. That's…flattering. Yeah. Wake up. Why, where are we going? Atlanta. What's in Atlanta? You see this? Yes. Do you know what it is? Uh, it's a– What is it? It's a doll. It's not a doll. Oh, it's not. Gimmie a dollar. -_- It's a poppit. “Dr pimple popper” Ew that's fucking gross. I hate this. Let me see. Does s/he have backne? Yes/No. Great, i'll take it. Fuckit. Okay, I got to “whatever”. You went too far. What? I thought I was supposed to go past “fuckit” Yeah, you go past fuckit, I did that! But if you get to “whatever”, you've gone too far. You've gotta go back. Back to WHAT. There was almost no space between “fuckit” and “whatever” Oh trust me. There is. So? This is how he's been controlling you. And? And!? Has it ever occurred to you that I want to be controlled? What! That it just takes the right person to get that kind of permission– permission to what Permission to ride. … Maybe I gave him the reigns. What horse “gives” its rider the reigns. Who said anything about a horse?! Another Horse Mix. Nice. fuck . FYCK. I told you. You know what…Maybe that's my poppit. What. Maybe. I'm so confused. Oh, good–the reversal spell worked. You did a reversal spell on me? Only after I found out what spell you put on ME–FIRST. Yeah, except I wasn't the first one to use that spell on you. EXACTLY. COPY-CAT. Moo. Aww. I'm a cat. … *face* I mean “meow” That's right. Cat. …moo. *face* Lookie here boys: What is it? –I'm leaving. Oh, you're gonna wanna hear this. What. I found the first “whites only” water fountain since 1962. Okay, what do you want? A deal. Oh, I'll give you a deal. Cash up front. [He presents a one dollar bill] Is this enough. [beat] Where are you going with this? Nowhere, fast. YO. What now, dude. SHE'S ONTO US. I doubt that. Look at this. I highly doubt– *gaaassp* Shenanigans! You know what I like about you, Ariana? Everything. Hah. Hm. You know how to keep a secret. I don't know what you're talking about. Exactly. *rolls eyes, flips hair.* Well, here's another one for you. –Another what? This is how my darkness becomes your darkness. I already have enough on my own. I know. You don't know. Only God knows. MOM! Don't ask me again. This is heavy, Doc. What is it? The soup! It's too heavy. Too much cream? Way too much! I have a meeting! Meeting with who? The Hollywood People. When? Soon–what time is it? I don't know. Dammit! Why don't you have any clocks in your house? I only just recently remembered what a clock was. Oh! Here. [God produces a small pocket watch and presents it to him; it's nearly noon on EARTH; But the two are sharing a meal of course in the famed kitchen of the Creator in the TImeless VOID.] Ah, Jesus Christ! He's not here… I'm gonna be late. Now, now; You know I wouldn't let that happen– [a smug look| Hugs and Kisses. [As they embrace, he disappears into a mist of light and stardust, fading away from the void and into the exterior world; he realizes God has slipped him the watch; he flips it open to reveal the time: it is now 11:44] Amazing. V.O. Now you won't wait so long to visit. [He places the wach in his pocket and walks into the studio] MICHAEL J. FOX has been asked to reprise his role as MARTY MCFLY many times before; But never for a project like this. ____ Meanwhile, What am I going to do with you? [The Festival Project.™] YOU'RE DEAD TO ME! –I'm dead to everyone! Don't do this. You wanted to come to the other side. No, I didn't. We'll you're here anyway; Might as well stay awhile. With eyes like burning fire And saddles for the riders The horse begins to gallop (or the horses, rather) On the mark to beating drums To move them forward faster What the fuck is this. idk. Kx5. *-* !_! Here u go Wat is this. it's a dragon. Oh, thats nice. Ya. Whats it do. Idk. dragon things. ok. Don't put it in ur bathroom. Why. idrk. Hm. † Hey. Ugh–No, Kaskade, go away. It's me, Ryan! No, Get out! I'm No† Ka–k (gags) –skade! Gross! It's just Ryan! I promise! NO. GET OUT. Lmfao. Right. This show is fantastic. Who was that. Fucking–Kaskade again! Are you sure. Ugh. Looks like Ryan. Kaskade is Kaskade. {shrugs] Dudes a creep. “Kaskade Ruins Lives” Is this the same episode as before? Eventually, yes. Wasn't I doing something Are you goona let this go? Um. Well I'm fucked. Why, what happened. Obsidian. That should do Unsobsidian. Okay, i'm fucked, Well, what's this? An Oreo Cookie. I mean, sitting next to it. Oh, its a portal gun. Raves are not just raves– A party is not simply a “party” –These big festivals –they're diversions. –DIstractions. Distractions from what. If you were supposed to know, –you'd know. it wouldn't be so important that you go. Why is it? These ancient rituals… It's occult magic. They've got it down to a science. The government funds this. The government funds everything. WoooooooW. It's not really a secret, if you can google it. ‘-complications.' I'm lost somewhere, gone HIppopatamus feeling quite off in the galaxies, galavanting Gazing at Daisies Aces and spades Gone from Heaven to Hades for days On the A– Adjacent Recently dismantling adjectives, Lampshades and matching curtains God it hurts, every day that I think about you; But how can i be about you when You don't even see me, do you Signature consignments, Wrong environments and irony is, I wasn't invited– –but invented it WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Great, now I have to explain myself. You don't have to. What's this space for? Oh, that's the red room. [The Red Room] Well, obviously, but– But what? What's it for? I don't think anybody should read this. HEY. Participation Only– Oh! No peeking! You ever feel like you're doing too much? Yeah, but not for money. Look, we have them surrounded. Our best course of action is to– deadmau5 . What? No– DEADMAU5. Well, are you sure it was a mouse and not a rat? It was a mouse. I know the difference. Do you, though? Look, I've lived in Mexico and New York City. So. In Queens. Oh. That's mathematically impossible. I mean it's not–impossible. No, it's not just impossible. It's mathematically impossible. Has it ever occurred to you that the DJ World in entirety exists outside of the realm of math and science? What is this. Just–enjoy the rave. No. What is this. Look at the firewoooorkkks! Woo EDC… NO. What is this right here. BEFORE: Hey, you still got that balloon? Yeah. Lemme see it. Dude, what are you doing? …I'mma go catch me a DJ. THIS IS NUTS. I can't feel my face. What do you call this? Collateral Damage. Look, I'm going to have to take frequent trips to the bathroom. ok . And–uhh– and. Uhh– Why did you call me over here. Cause i can. Look. this is not magic. This is not science. This is not “voodoo” Voodoo is magic. It's just music. W H E R E D I D H E G O O O O O I don't know. Fuck dude, I fucked up. Once again– Of course you did. What did you do this time? I might have evaporated someone with my fat fucking bass. Nice. Way to go. Yeah. Wait. … Did you just say. HE JUST He deserted me. SO WAIT, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE? ALRIGHT, WHO THREW A ROCKSTAR IN MY TENT? JEFF Alright, lets go. WHO DID THIS. So what's this place. Lets not let this conversation resurface. This is a 21 Plus Event. What about VIP VIP is 25 Plus. What about that place. Sorry kids. [NO ENTRY] We gotta get in there. So then they wanted an Encore. Did you give them an encore? NO, i was already at my hotel room. Then how did you know that they wanted an encore? WHICH IS IT, THE WYNN, OR THE ENCORE. FUCK, I DON'T REMEMBER. Please, who stays at the Encore for EDC? Have you literally never been out with rich people? No, I literally just got rich. Oh, nice. So, wait, like– Here we go. Dillon Francis has just always been rich? Uh-huh. And Skrillex has always been rich? Yes. Definitely. And deadmau5. deadmau5 is Canadian. OH MY GOD. W E L C O M E I'm going to need your absolute discretion about this. Alright. Sign this waiver. …this is a…pretty heavy packet. I'll wait. I've never signed an NDA like that in my life. Lil' biiiiiiiiiiiiiitzzzz Can we just admit it's weird that we live in an era where “NDA” is household jargon. And like, everyone knows what it means. Everyone knows what an NDA is. I appreciate the sentiments Isn't it weird how it sets in automatically? Autopilot, go. Aww, i don't want to be Autopilot. You're on autopilot. I don't really have to think about it anymore, I'll have to sleep on it Wear a white t-shift, Hear the applause of the audience, Eat it You wanna know what I think? You want to know what I'm drinking? You know what I need? An Icee, (cause I see you typing) An awful Omnipotence A God of Mirages No more carbohydrates, I gotta get all thin; Forgot to acknowledge Whether or not i'm turning this off soon I are. I…”are” I are. Infinite Reality. OH. I. R. IR! IR! IRV I ARE. Suddenly, I remember the taste of talcum powder As If I were Moving backwards In time, Like, Why, God on earth would My mom let me try that, But if i'm honest, Fuck man, I hate deadmau5– There's just too much in here. Beep boop. I love deadmau5. It's so simple. What is this, MATH?! THIS IS AERODYNAMICS. WHAT THE FUCK ARE AERO DYNAMICS DId you mean what you said about that? I meant everything I said. Goddammit, fuck this, I was in the middle of a really complex poem In realtime, listening to deadmau5 Having a partially out of body spiritual experience, Entirely fucking sober FACEPALM BLŪ 8facepalming dramatically in frustration* NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO EXPLAIN ANY OF THIS. beepboop. YO. Oh, I forgot my open form poetry, or my mom How my mom once allowed me to gnaw on talcum powder But who can blame her That was a hard one It was a past life And now ive Got Another One HOly shit what version of the cube is this. 1D. What. You'll get it. Wait. Have you ever stopped for a minute to think– I can't stop for a minute, especially just to “think” [Literally stops for a minute to think.] No fucking way, uh-uh. Come on, man. No. I ain't time travelin' wit deadmau5. Come on– NO. –that someone else has already figured all of this out and that's how any of it is possible in the first place. Alright, i'm gonna need some mind-altering drugs for this. What are you doing. Voluntary Ego Death. I– Wait. Why would you. Get out of my brain. I am your brain. Take care, now. Holy shit, it seems like she's getting more evil. That's because she's definitely more evil ALRIGHT, I'M TIRED OF THIS: WHERE IN THE FUCK IS SKRILLEX. MEANWHILE INT. IN THE FUCK. DAY. *rings doorbell* AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME. I'm not joking, that's…literally the answer to your question. Oh. Fuck. What dude. We gotta go back. I left the keys in the pocket of the guy I shapeshifted into. Are you serious? It's fine, he can't have gone too far, dude. What do you mean he “left the dimension” He entered a portal. He– wait, excuse me. A portal. A “portal”, dude? Yeah; a portal. What do you mean “a portal” A portal, like— you know, like a portal gun, but not a portal gun, just a portal. Uh huh. Excuse us for a second. What the fuck is this dude talking about? I don't know, man. Humans don't use portals! I know man. What the fuck! Well, wait—how do we know that guy is human. He looks human. Yeah dude but, we look human. Duh! Cause we shifted! Yeah, but, how do we know he's not a shifter. Because, dude, I know a shifter when I see one. Yeah, but—you know, what if he's really good. I highly doubt that. Why? Cause I'm the best. No, I am. Exactly, so we'd know if it was another shifter–cause we're the best shifters! Well, let's at least try to see if he knows anything else about those guys. They were together right? I hope not. No, not like that—like Okay, okay, whatever, let's just… Wait, where'd he go? Excuse me. What up. There was just another guy over here just now— He was like—you know—normal looking guy Tie die* shirt Yeah. Did you see him. Yeah, I saw him. Alright, cool, where'd he go? He left. What?! That was fast! Yeah, well…it happens. Are you sure? Yes. *actually is shifter* [as they walk away, the shifter shifts, and then vanishes into a random portal.] Awww, dammit, Now we're never gonna find this guy. Never say never. Whatever, we're dead. We're always dead. Yeah, but like in modern human slang terms Oh, yeah, that. Anyways, I gotta relieve this human's bladder. I fucking hate this species for this. It is useless. *enters portal potty* [ Wait, whatever actually did happen to Dillon Francis? That's great, I was just getting to that. 19 Pages. Nice. …no, 12. What. [11:12] Okay, I'm gonna kill him. Oh, I banished him. With my fists. Nice. Tits. Nice tits. Thx. Hey man. Hey what. Remember that smudge on the lens. Yeah. It just got bigger. … did you try vinegar instead of Windex. Yes. –IT'S NOT A SMUDGE. Did you try Windex with Vinegar. –IT'S NOT A– Shut up. I'm. So. Hungry. Look, do you want this, or not? Do you feel like any of this is a coincidence? Just quit, it. Dillon Francis. WHERE IS IT? I don't know. Lets kick this up a notch. ILLUMINATI What do you want? … I want the full package. ILLUMINATI Okay, I'm gonna need specifics. How do you even get a job as a courier for the illuminati? [INDEED.COM | ILLUMINATI - COURIER- URGENTLY HIRING] Hm. It was a pretty specific list. I don't even get the point of a barbeque if everyone is vegan Well, The Mayor eats fish. Oh please, where is THAT guy the Mayor of? I don't know. We meet in the Matrix. This is for you. Oh. Do you like it? I– It's not a brothel! It's Member's Only! YOu BUY a Membership. Yeah. And WOMEN. HEy, MAN, YOU CAN BUY DUDES, TOO. SHHH. Oh no. What. What did you do? I gave her my credit card. The Heavy One? Yes, and– “AND” –access to the black market. Cool, I got it. Oh, another auction. Of course another auction. What'd you buy this time? A lifesize deadmau5 bobblehead. What are you gonna do with that? Wouldn't you like to know. Ok, gross. LIL BIIIIIIIITXXXX I love a good deamau5 show. He really does have the best fans, It's a comfortable, safe space. Very inviting. Everyone is happy. What the fuck, dude, this place is a sausage fest. Yeah, that's deadmau5 for ya. Hey, I'm looking for this shithead. Oh, that dude? Yeah, have you seen him? Fuck, I wish this never happened. LIL BIIIIITz If you don't know who deadmau6* is– GET OUT. Jk. but seriously this is easily the most devastating person i've ever seen. Maybe just to me, but. Are you sure that's the right guy? Yeah, that's gotta be him. Is he wearing glasses? Ugh. Oh wait. Damn. ‘Fuck, it is my sapiosexuality, I think' Even if it was perhaps an error, as I might have more than needed a new pair of glasses myself, just the thought of Joel in a pair of specables was suddenly and immediately the equivalent of Dillon Francis sitting down at a piano, or Sonny doing just about literally anything–and I realized, finally, that the most indecent things about myself were quite possibly only happening inside my own mind– Okay, my body does really weird things to this dude's music. Are you sure this is real? No. I love this. Just shut up and do your job. What a nightmare. PLease HElP ME. Hm. That can't be right. What. This translates to H E L P M E Oh, shit, I gotta go. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm always working. Shouldn't you be working right now? I'm at work. Well, that was nice and all, but–I gotta get out of here. Where are you going? To shoot myself. Wow, that's one hell of a smile. Just–take it. I'm sorry, i can't accept this. What is even happening in this series? Like, a lot WOULD YOU KIDS SETTLE DOWN. *not settling down* *lil biiiiiiiitz* You know what I wonder? I wonder this I'm sober. I'm just sober sally over here. I didn't get sober. I just am. Cause i'd rather face the pain of this harsh reality with a bite than to dull it out and then wake up in the morning Or–just–whenever– To wake up whenever and be like “OH NO, THIS IS WHAT IT'S REALLY LIKE” And the shock of it is so horrible that I just have to repeat that cycle again. ‘OH NOOOOOO” *gets faded* “It's all goooooood” No, it isn't. But i choose to stay like that cause it's like a It's not even a happy medium, It's more like a median-medium But you know what? It makes happier moments more happy And shitter moments less shitty Because i don't have this like drastic spacial Augmented reality or like smoke screen of emotional apathy. I get to feel things way more intensely. I don't have to wonder, ever “oh , did that just happen, cause I was messed up” Or like “would it have happened this way if I was sober” At all. I'm just level– No false sense of Pretty much anything. But i do wonder, though– Like, for people who weren't always sober, and then GOT sober– like , what's the breaking point What's the tip? I always have to sit back and wonder “What did you DO?” Cause you know it had to be something if suddenly “I don't drink anymore” I always wonder, and it's like– no disrespect or anything thing but… I really wanna hear that story. lol . I know you don't wanna tell it (if you can) But wanna hear it. Cause from my point of view. IT's probably hilarious. I know. I'm a dick. Holy shit. What is that. Looks like pasquale went all out with the fireworks this year. …is that a penis? WELCOME HOME It's a giant dick- in-the-sky! GOD IS REAL! JESUS Look, so i've been having second thoughts about this whole thing. What the fuck man. You gotta stop doing shit like this. JESUS I literally can't. I know, but. Okay, look. I'm not writing any of that. You've gotta tell him. NO, RYAN. WELL, WHY NOT. BECAUSE, RYAN. WHY. DEADMAU5 ISN'T REAL. Damn, am I in here. Nice. Of course I am. Well, how'd that happen. This is like a sea of cellphones. Perfect. It was a red car; I wasn't all there, And if you want her, You can have her Fuck. What. I forgot the rest of the verse. It's ok. We gotta move on. No, I gotta go back. For what. For my fans. Aw. What's this. IT's a ceramic mug. Wow, that's nice. I made it Wait. You made that?! Yeah. With your hands?! Yeah. Why would you do that? For you. What. I made it for you? Like, you thought of me first, then you made it? Yeah. WHY? Cause i love you! WOW. Fans are awesome OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *Sometimes. *vomits* … *dies* … *godlessness* [Devastating DJ Moments] I don't get it dawg, all this shit is in your music particles?! “Music particles” UGH. what . That's it. Don't be smart around me. Uh. I'm not smart? No, that won't work; sarcasm is a sign of deeper intelligence. “Sorry” Stop saying that. This is America. S– Don't say it again. Apology not accepted. Don't look at me like that. Like what. With your face. *face* Quick: Say something stupid and random. …I like anime. Oh good, that worked. Thanks. Where are you going? Idk somewhere else. Really, that's it? Yeah. That's all you have to say/ That's literally it. Are you seeing this. Yes. So what's the problem. Oh no, she's stuck in a loop. Throw the whole fan away. [DELETE] Did it work. Did what work. Oh, good. Cool. Wait. See ya later. Did what work? I wish i could just forget about this. Everything? Yeah. Look, this is between me and God–okay? GOD Don't drag me into this. You dragged ME into this! GOD Right. So i could get OUT; So don't drag me back in. Fuck, I remember this. I must have done something important here. Like what. Look, I love you. Great, now what do we do? Bury the body, I guess. *shrugs* Wait, what happened? Somebody dies. OKay, me first. Other Three: Who wants to go next. *still in shock* Fuck man, told you this was a long ass story. *Crying* I'm ruined. What! You went broke? No, i'm still a filthy rich millionaire. I thought you were a billionaire. I am I just *snifs* sometimes I forget that happened. “Sometimes I forget I'm a billionaire” I got to admit, man, I did it to myself. I'm not mad, or anything, but now there's just–certain things I can't do Oh, like what. Not that song. What, why not? You said “anything but Skrillex” this is not Skrillex, this is deadmau5. What's the difference? Okay, that's like saying “What's the difference between deadmau5' and my music?” No, it isn't. How is that not different? That's like comparing the music of Bach and Beethoven to the music of a tattooed hedgehog. You think I look like a hedgehog. No, it's just when I see you and a hedgehog I have all the same thoughts, turn this off. NO, i like this song. Seriously, Dillon Francis, turn it off. I'm gonna turn it up instead. I do not highly recommend doing that. Or at all. This ship has amazing subs. Should I bass boost this song. NO, PROBABLY NOT. Oh, why not? Dillon Francis, I'm warning you, stop. OH HOW COME BECAUSE WHY? BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A HEDEHOG NO, BECAUSE I ALWAYS FALL ASLEEP AT THIS *DROP* [INSTANTLY FALLS ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL–ACTIVATES HYPERSPACE– PLUMMETS SHIP INTO BLACK – HOLE. ohhhhh . What a hoe. Nice, that's a whole episode. Well, here's a bonus scene or whatever. Shazam, what is this. SHAZAM …i don't know. What do you mean you don't know. SHAZAM *panicing* IDONNO WHAT DO YOU MEAN– SHAZAM IDON. NO. OOOOOOOOOOOO Is this deadmau5. I'm not sure. Sounds like deadmau5. It sure does. This is pretty Ooh. it sparkles. yeah , it's deadmau5. How does she KNOW. I need a deadmau5 machine like right now. I know where to find that. Fuck dude, everything's gonna be half-ass until I push out this album. You can't rush it. Trust the process. I can't focus. Oh shit, wasn't this in the last episode? Yeah. I'm still writing backwards. God, what is that, like a pipe organ. WHAT SYNTH IS THIS. Doesn't matter, I just need one. That's it. I know what I'm going to spend my Jimmy Fallons On. And What's that? V.O. OOh. Are we Montaging–to deadmau5? [MONTAGE: deadmau5] Nice. I love a good montage. I love deadmau45* AHH OH NO. I love deadmau5. I keep making typos and I keep forgetting to delete that parallel where. fuckit. That's the synth I've always wanted. It's on sale for $999 At Sam Ash But…you only have Five JImmy Fallons. There are only five special edition in this Volume The Jimmy Fallon 555's I don't know how many volumes there are, but this is the Volume I started keeping track. Fuck, man. I miss Equinox. It's just Eucalyptus. They also have an outdoor running track where you get the best ever view of midtown manhattan. How do you know it's the best ever view of Midtown manhattan. Because it's on a running track. STOP WHISTLING IN MY WHOOP=WHOOPS. The JImmy Fallon 555s are marked with the standard Jimmy Fallon in black ink With a simple side marker of the number 555 in red And also in red, a telephone number on the back. But–that synthesizer is One Thousand Jimmy Fallons. Yeah. So I only need Nine Hundred Ninety Five More. And of course, the Eye of Providence is highlighted. Also Standard. V.O. I always highlight that. Cause, you know… “Illuminati” These are fake. No they're not! They're counterfeit, sorry. No they're not! They're authentic! Why the fuck does this matter so much? You know. What is it with this dude. If it was a snake, it would've bit ya. It was a snake. And it did bite me. He's so increasingly beautiful to me, And I'm still in love with his friend, or misrepresented masterpiece, Progression of a monster, or procession of a superstar, but Something in the story sparks the thought of All we are is consciousness, of course Awkward in body, but of constellations Cosmos, It's not just a corpse; It's all got love in it, Absurd, and sipping carbonated syrup, but I'm just sitting in my stirrups, Here comes galloping a horse, Of course, it hurts to turn it off For just a moment And remember That i'm just a homeless, Stuck and sitting up at night Writing recourse, hugging learning curves in ableton, Curving curses, been reminded that I'm worthless In a thousand words or less, Or just another form of torture, Nothing said, but all that's done Another day another dollar, But it's not It's Jimmy Fallon. I thought this was enter the multiverse. Are you ready to go. No. A hand on my shoulder So paifully socially awkward, I grow stretchmarks, don't know what to call them But scars, But the uglier ones, I've thought Are invisible, Somewhat– To the naked eye Or just anyone Not tiger stripes But one, an eye of horus Carved above my right And inside my lip, (The bottom one) A raised scar in the shape of a sythe I probably died by the hands of a man named Starr So it's hard to shrug it off, And 555 is just a number But it's not It's another scar, It's a punishment For loving him. What's on the back. It's…a number. What number? A telephone number. What. Like a 1-800 Number Call it. I love deadmau5. Something about a big, giant smiling robotic mouse that lights up and sparkles. Why? I don't know. I'm like 5. I see deadmau5 i'm like “WHEEEEEEE” My hands go up in the air “AHHHHHH! YAYYYYY” I'm so stupid. It's so stupid. But you know what? It makes me feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I love it. And by the time I even figured out what deadmau5 was I was so late to the party that I had to make up for lost time. I listened to deadmau5 doing EvErYThING. Everything you could possibly imagine. Well–Except one. Wait, how long have you been cellibate? Forever, probably. Fuck, what happened in here? I don't know. Everything's broken. My head My heart. Everything. Get up, Dillon Francis. Fuck, what happened. You sent us through a black hole. And we crashed on a random ass planet. Fuck, that sucks. YOu suck, Dillon Francis. Ugh. Now get up. Everything's fucked up. SUPERSTAR DJ I'm a paradox. I've got a box of skeletons in my closet i'm not ready to part with. I had a heart attack; I had a heart once, But lately it goes in my pocket; Or my right hand, When I wake up From a dream land, From a long hug From a nice man In a t-shirt KASKADE This is God's PLAN. RYAN, GET FUCKED. 800-799-7233 Did you call the number. Yeah. What is it. [National Domestic Violence Hotline] Woah. That was a long bonus scene. Well, Now here's a PSA. AND A PSA? YES. A PSA. You know what the fucked up thing about all this is, The Legend of Supacree is a true story. All of it. ALL OF IT?! ALL OF IT!? YES. Even the part about– YES. Especially that part. Woah. Damn. I think i'm gonna be sick. Shut up, Dillon Francis. No, but seriously– This is the story of how I got my heart broken so bad. YOU RUINED IT. So, so bad– I HATE YOU. That i started singing about it. NSA, totally *not spying* …are you hearing this. Yes. ILLUMINATI Check this out. Another one down. And how when you start making music– What is this. it's hoe math. And that music actually comes from a really real place. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. really real shit starts happening. You–killed yourself. well , to be fair–I lost everything first. Congratulations. Thx. Here's a skrillex. WHT. Kbye. Really, really, really. What, the fuck Dillon Francis, crawled inside of you to live and made it'self at home? Idon'tknow. What is in this sauce? Just–kill him. What, i can't just. Just kill him, while nobody is watching. Please don't kill me. Shut up, man. I'm having a thought process. Okay, that's it. FUCK DILLON FRANCIS. That's the spirit. THAT IS THE SPIRIT. IT'S THE HOLY SPIRIT. Who the fuck is this. It's–Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ?! JESUS CHRIST i'M BACK, MOTHERFUCKER. Wait, are you claiming that the second coming of the messiah is upon us?! YES. Well,Technically, it's the third. And it's all because of Dillon Francis?! I Please stop this HATE Help YOU. Fuck, dude. I know, huh. What did he DO. The third?! How did we miss that?! Uh, you didn't. [HITLER, being HITLER] (he was mad) Okay, that's it. You can't write any of this. Uh, I can. I just did. Technically, I'm dead: this is just a voiceover It's an 80's style PSA You can't say Hitler was the messiah. That's offensive. Everything is offensive. FUCK YOU DILLON. I'msosorry NOTYETYOU'RENOT. Wait, whatever happened to Skrillex. SKRILLEX is waiting outside of the alleged home of SUPACREE's “distant relatives” Lol is he for real at her mom's house. well , to be fair, he's like–looked everywhere else. Ur right. That was a lot of dimensions. So. like. Fuck, i didn't even have that much coffee. It just goes on forever. [DILLON FRANCIS STILL HAS HOTSAUCE IN HIS PUDGY LITTLE EYES] Good. Cause if I see the pupils, i'm wasting him. You think you can do better than this. Better than this? Yes. Yes. Then do it. Alright, is the PSA over? No, not yet. I gotta say one more thing. What is it? Would you ever have done it, Or would you ever be honest If you had, Handed her a lesson, Or a stretch of the past From the present moment, My heart, and my mind And my lover I present you this honor From now on to nowhere I no longer… Want to be near you Or to know you Or to hear you Or to fear you No longer… Want to feel you Or to touch you Or to have you Or to hold you Or to love you No longer, I no longer want you Devastating, A song stuck in my head for a whole world I wonder how long it would take to go back there A room full of actors, A manager, Never a backpack to wear Just a handful of hats, One director, Eventually producer Just now a showrunner Look at how long that took. I had to wonder what auroras in the north thought of someone like Sonny. They showed me. Now I can love you no longer So much for getting acquainted Funny what age equates to in ageless An infinite wisdom, I dismissed him, Nor, would I believe that he ever would hit her, but Some might belong in such a category Though i carry the marks and the scars Of what my once- husband did to me –but no longer. I haven't a heart in the world left But a broken one, made of amethyst. Fuck off, Dillon Francis. A calculated attack on my psyche. I like it a lot, But i'm fonder of sodom. WHAT. Are you saying you woul actually participate in an orgy! Oh GOD no! Oh, Good, cause– But i'd host one. WHAT. The hedonists are a fun bunch. Oh my God. Though, Nowadays, of course, I haven't the slightest idea what to call them. I saw the future. Well, obviously, if you've headlined EDC you've seen the future. I remember all of it. That must be awful. Why don't you remember it? Because i don't want to. Not at all. I did once. Then what happened? I hated it so much, i forgot. You forgot on purpose. I had to. Love, or Music. …Music. Love, or Fame. Fame. Okay, ouch. Love, or Music? …Love. Okay. Love, or Fame. Love. Okay. Love, or music? … Isn't that the same thing? Hm. Love, or Fame? ….Why do you keep asking me the same question. I beg your pardon? Why beg? I mean– What do you mean? What do you mean? Well, first you asked me, If would rather have Love or Music. Love. Music. Yes. In my mind, those are synonyms. Neither can really exist without the other. Okay, and Fame. Love and Fame are also synonyms– How so? Ugh, I just made this difficult on myself. It was always difficult. It really wasn't. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U. WHY IS IT ALWAYS CHRISTMAS?! BEcause, you're in a movie. WHAT. You're stuck in a Hollywood movie. The Master Sorcerer Of the Grand Illusion You just want it so bad You don't know what you're in for Inquenchable Thirst for knowledge Insatiable Sexual Appetite Yo My horizontal monster wants ya Could revert to vert, but lets keep Our options open Covert, __ My heart is broken No window open Who left the draft in –motherfucker My heart is broken I need a lover I need a lover Some one to hug me I need a hug, but And– I'm not fit to touch The hem of your garment The tip of your dick or fit enough to be your girlfriend I guess i'll just have to live with that When I have an itch, I scratch it myself I made the assumption you can't, And moved passed it But something's been calling me out, from the past Something's been calling me back to the magic I can't get around that Do you hate me? I can see that I'll just make my way back to the beginning Though I'm envious And i pity her, The both of you really There's nothing left between us except Insanity//Infinity Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written INT. SAM ASH MANHATTAN. DAY. A tiny conga for 90 dollars I could die in here Maybe I am just like you I find my way to the prettiest thing in the room And have my way with it Just for a few minutes Consume it, then move on Saw Madison dancing badly on Madison Avenue It's okay, You're a white girl So everybody loves you Everybody loves you Everybody loves you, no matter what you do. As for me, I can't say when I'm going through But you couldn't do it, Madison That's as bad as being at a standstill at rush out in Manhattan With enough practice I could buy everything in Sam ash And make my own band with it That's the plan at least— But I been having a long death And the afterlife isn't as after as everybody says it is Don't hold your breath, Unless you're re

Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

Kendrick Style Flow Don't key my car: You'll be callin collect! I got rearview mirrors in the back of my head Don't get up right now, son– Go back to bed I got kids all over, be pulling my leg! Luke, I am your Father! Oh My Oh My God On top of the Watchlist You make money off dope; I made it on craigslist Still be sniffin that coke But now i'm on A list I'm the greatest Ey Miss! I missed too many calls (Airplane Mode) I just started my day (Whole Workload) I might need a buffet (Like Whole Foods) Sashe, Pas De Bourre (That's a code word) No dance floor? Now you're done for My forte Four-to-the-floor Hardcore I drop bass on the encore Front row won't go But i'm already out the front door You don't know I just hopped inside the helicopter, or chopper, chopped broccoli in my cup That's supper; Sleep/ Wake then Surf's up In the morning When i got there (Coastal show, Shower, Then another club Encore Front row lined up I'm already at the front door They want more I'm too sore, for sure Off subject, I dropped in Harder than Paulie On my surfboard (Another code word) This is my world: Another club, Then I'm off for a monday Or somethin' Write another song At the buffet –Tales of a Superstar DJ Amen. Fuck! I didn't even get to watch desperate housewives! Don't fuck with her! She's a trained assassin! GET ON THE GROUND. NO! GET ON THE GROUND– OR I WILL SHOOT YOU! SO? IF I SHOOT YOU, YOU WILL DIE. OK? “OK”? YOU WILL DIE. YEAH, AND? Kind of frustrating hunting down somebody who already has a deathwish. What do you do with someone who has no fear of death. Give them life. I'm telling you, we probably shouldn't be doing this. *shrugs* You split yourselves into two entirely separate individuals at once, just so you could see whose dick is longer? Technically, three entirely separate individuals. THIS ISN'T FAIR. Do you ever think? Sometimes, but it's usually pretty gross. I mean about the implications of these things! You are the implications of these things! I split my soul ONE time into 8 BILLION or so individuals, before this even had happened. WOAH, WHAT HAPPENED. I'm giving you planetary confinement. What. You–can stay here. On this planet. No. It's racist–and primitive. No– And you're black. Please– I'm leaving. –don't– –and i'm taking your portal gun with me. YOU PUT A PORTAL ON MY FACE?! Genius. Incredible. I didn't think it would be a big deal. He has two! Okay, time for work. But i didn't even sl– Coffee. Ouh. … … — I don't think we should be doing this TIA We probably shouldn't. TAMERA We very much shouldn't. What are you guys doing. Nothing. SHh. Summoning the devil. It's not the devil. It might be. Hush. Is that a pentagram. Technically it's a star, with a circle around it. That's a pentagram. It's not a pentagram! Is that a ouiji board? NO. Yes. Let me see. Ugh! I wanna help. MEANWHILE. MORGAN FREEMAN enters an empty train car: Oh God, This. Yes it is! What!? Are you dead! Entirely empty, that is–besides SUPACREE. No, you are! Great, so you're dead! I'm–not dead. Is Bob Saget with you? I'm not DEAD. What about Fraiser? What? Kelsey Grammer! God rest his soul. SEE! I'm not dead– [beat, an eerie shadowy silence in the dimly lit traincar] I'm a Legend. What. I wrote that/ You wrote that. What. Ugh. Look. Morgan Freeman. [Morgan Freeman] I–am–like a paranoid schizophrenic, or something– So, who isn't?! It might be catatonic, I don't know–I got this whole dead-hand–thing–going on. What is that? I don't know. It might just be too much deadmau5. I don't understand. No, Morgan Freeman. I don't understand. Anything about this life. Or this world. The fourth dimension. I definitely don't know anything about that. You're in it. Whatever. Look. [Morgan Freeman] God, you have so many freckles. [Morgan Freeman] Look. I got problems. We all do! Nah, not like–Hollywood problems, I'm like, a real psycho and shit. Sounds like Hollywood. Everything sounds like Hollywood–because nothing is real anymore–everything is for the gram, the points don't matter–nothing actyally matters. At all. Oh? Oh. The train comes to a sudden halt, the lights dim theatrically. Not even this? [pause] He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golden pinata; You know who gave it to me? …Who? Got ya. He holds out a strange object; a golden necklace, which begins to change in appearance–morphing between a medallion, as seen throughout the seasons, and into other integral objects from throughout the series; a small golde pinata ; Fuck dude, i'm too tired to write this. But you kind of have to. I mean i don't have to. YOU HAVE TO. I–WHAT? YOU HAVE TO DO IT. WHY. BECAUSE OTHERWISE I DON'T EVEN EXIST; Then don't exist… I'M JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN YOUR SHOW. Come on Drew, knock it off. Wait, is this Drew Carey, or Barrymore. Either or. That's why I didn't write the characters name. Well, which is it? It literally doesn't matter. Yes it does. Honestly?! It could be both! We just shoot it with both and keep whichever one we like better! But how do we know which is actually “better?” Just do it and mix it–cut it up together or something–I don't know! Cut takes! Cut Takes! Ooh, did someone say CUPCAKES. Don't mind if i DO. Well, I do! Why?! What's wrong?! Yeah! What's the big deal! I'm on a gluten free-thing Oh yeah? Keto. Or someshit. I don't know. Oh. Oh. So you don't want these No, I don't. And you wouldn't mind if I– Come on, man. So Good. Grow up. Hey man, i'm pushin 40. Well, I pushed 40–and it pushed back. Get your cupcakes out of my face. You're no fun. Hey! Aren't you that one guy from rick and morty. Formerly. Oh yeah! That's right! You were Rick AND Morty. Hence the name. Wow. Phewf. I heard about that. Yeah, me too. Sounds real bad, how that turned out. Such a shame. Speaking of shame– You're speaking, I'm snacking. That's not that clever. We'll work on it The point is, he's eating the cupcakes. That's not–wait a minute–hold on. What now? How are we ever gonna get these three guys in a room together. [Meanwhile, in another dimension–these three are tied up (read: bound and gagged) in a room together. –Let alone to agree to this!? SUPACREE removes the gag from the man's [JOSH PECK'S] mouth. I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS. That's what she said! Hey! That's not fair! I was never caught up in a scandal! The key word, I believe, is “never caught” That's two words! SHUTTHEFUCKUP. How many words is that? I WANT MY LAWYER!!!! For what? This isn't court. Wouldn't you want the police first? WELL THEN, I WANT THE POLICE. The Police are here. Wait, they are? Oh, thank God Not so fast. THE POLICE enter with full entourage. Introducing: The Police–playing their number one greatest smash hit! Groupies: Woooo! STING I hope you ladies bought the meet-and-greet package, if you know what I mean. *winks awkwardly* You know what I mean. Oh my God. Since you dudes love doing creepy dude shit, I brought some more notoriously creepy dudes to sing the literally creepiest song ever written about being a creepy dude. That's not fair. But it's funny. THE POLICE Begin to play ‘I'll be Watching You” –and they're gonna play it on loop until I get back with your other-dimensional selves so we can fix all this. “WE” “FIX ALL THIS” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Nobody seems to know. “--I'll be watching you–” I was FRAMED. CUT TO a golden pocket watch, a wrist watch, a compass–it changes and morphs so quickly that it begins to seem to spin time itself into a whirlwind, until finally a portal opens up from within his hand–a portal which quickly devours him entirely, morphing him into Fuck, what the fuck happened after that Idk I got off the train I guess This is really terribly written {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

This week Phil and Tasha continue their look at things God is not, with a conversation about God NOT having a nationality. What does that mean? How does it affect our discipleship? What hard choices does it mean for us?

Content Sons of the living God Not fear, but adoption God's Spirit witnesses to ours Support our ministry and gain access to hours of seminary videos: https://crosstocrown.org/partners/ Song credit: “Beautiful Day” by Gabe Goodin — https://open.spotify.com/artist/654rVNYWPK6wKQjdJyX3BO My books: Exalted: Putting Jesus in His Place — https://www.amazon.com/Exalted-Putting-Jesus-His-Place/dp/0985118709/ref=tmm_pap_title_0 God's Design for Marriage (Married Edition) — https://www.amazon.com/Gods-Design-Marriage-Married-Amazing/dp/0998786306/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1493422125&sr=1-4&keywords=god%27s+design+for+marriage God's Design for Marriage (Pre-married Edition) — https://www.amazon.com/Gods-Design-Marriage-What-Before/dp/0985118725/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top crosstocrown.org @DougGoodin @CrossToCrown

For by grace are ye saved through faith and that not of yourselves it is the gift of God Not of works lest any man should boast

Grammy-nominated Kirtan singer and GoOD Friend, Krishna Das (KD) joins Nikki to talk about the first mantra he was given by Ram Dass (that saved him from a car accident), his experiences meeting Indian saints like Anandamayi Ma, his personal spiritual practice (chanting versus meditating), one of his favorite Christian Saints, St. Seraphim of Sarov, his time in India with Neem Karoli Baba aka Maharajji, and his time now, still living in the boundless presence that is his Guru. They cover how to manage doubt,  how to grow in Faith, and KD shares the mantra he turns to when maya/illusion gets very loud. Finally, KD leads a the beautiful 'Sri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram' chant. Watch on Youtube! राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम "The words of these chants are called the divine names and they come from a place that's deeper than our hearts and our thoughts, deeper than the mind. And so as we sing them they turn us towards ourselves, into ourselves. They bring us in, and as we offer ourselves into the experience, the experience changes us. These chants have no meaning other than the experience that we have by doing them. They come from the Hindu tradition, but it's not about being a Hindu, or believing anything in advance. It's just about doing it, and experiencing. Nothing to join, you just sit down and sing. The repetition of the holy names reveals a presence hidden within the heart. Something begins to happen that's very disturbing - we get happy." - Krishna Das  The 'Sri Ram' Mantra is known as the victory mantra. 'One gets success and victory in all his ventures who chants this mantra. It is a miracle mantra which can make the impossible tasks possible.' Sri - Honorific title to show respect and reverence Ram - the Light of your Soul  Jai - Victory or Triumph Victory to the Light within me. "Just take Ram's name and all desires will be fulfilled." - Maharajji to Dada in Miracle of Love "Q: Maharajji, what can I do to gain pure love for Ram? -- Maharajji's Answer: You will get pure love for Ram by the blessings of Christ. Hanuman and Christ are one. They are the same." - Miracle of Love "Standing or sitting, eating or lying down, if one chants 'Ram, Ram' constantly, one will be able to gain His Grace, there is no doubt about it. A person, who is anxious to gain God's Grace, can experiment on this and test its truth. He, who constantly chants 'Ram, Ram', will become Ram." -Sri Sitaramdas Omkarath Aditya Hridiyam Mantra Meditation with Ram Dass  - "All evil vanishes from life for him who keeps the Sun in his heart."  "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them." - Ephesians 2: 8-10   Chants of a Lifetime by Krishna Das   राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम To claim your free gift, leave a review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it and send it to me at nikki@curlynikki.com!  Join us on Patreon to support the show, and tune into and participate in live video Q&As with me!  Support the show राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम राम

How far can mercy reach? What is mercy? Mercy is a vital Christian term whose meaning is often misunderstood. In the most simple terms, mercy is God NOT giving us what we deserve.In Isaiah 50:2, God asked Israel, Is my hand shortened at all, that it cannot redeem? or have I no power to deliver? Nine chapters later, Isaiah 59:1, answers the question like this, behold, the LORD's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save.The Prophet Isaiah confirmed the reach of God's mercy has no limits. God's "hand" has not lost any of its power. His ability to save has not changed. His power has not become weaker. His reach has not become shorter. God's mercy was able to reach David in his lowest times. God's mercy was able to reach the prodigal son in a far country. The mercy of God was able to reach a woman from Samaria. And mercy is able to reach you. Dear listener, may this episode be a constant reminder that no matter what life brings your way, the reach of God's mercy is well able to help you in your time of need. Thanks for listening. Let's keep building! Support the showVisit the link below and tap support to financially sponsor the Building Great Lives mission.http://buildinggreatlivespodcast.com/Feel led to partner with our global ministry? 100% of all donations go directly to our global missions and humanitarian efforts. https://venmo.com/u/Trent-Gilliam-3https://www.paypal.me/RevTrentGilliamConnect on social media. https://instagram.com/revgilliamhttps://www.facebook.com/trent.gilliam

NOTHING BUT LEAVES part 2 Matthew 21:18 - 22 1. Recognize your desperate need for God "in your desperate condition, you called out to God. He got you out in the nick of time. He put your feet on a wonderful road that took you straight to a good place to live." Ps. 107:6 & 7 “O God, You are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you” Psalm 63:1 2. Realize the will of God “we have the mind of Christ” 1 Corinthians 2:16 “The secret of the Lord is for those who fear Him” Psalm 25:14 3. Rely on the power of God ‘“Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,' says the Lord” Zechariah 4:6 4. Rest in the promises of God “Cease striving and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10 “there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God.” Hebrews 4:9 “Sabbath” - to cease Verse of the Week: “all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.” Matthew 21:22

NOTHING BUT LEAVES part 2 Matthew 21:18 - 22 1. Recognize your desperate need for God "in your desperate condition, you called out to God. He got you out in the nick of time. He put your feet on a wonderful road that took you straight to a good place to live." Ps. 107:6 & 7 “O God, You are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you” Psalm 63:1 2. Realize the will of God “we have the mind of Christ” 1 Corinthians 2:16 “The secret of the Lord is for those who fear Him” Psalm 25:14 3. Rely on the power of God ‘“Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,' says the Lord” Zechariah 4:6 4. Rest in the promises of God “Cease striving and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10 “there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God.” Hebrews 4:9 “Sabbath” - to cease Verse of the Week: “all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.” Matthew 21:22