Heat Stroke

SubRant Picard sucks Patrick Stewart, Liam Neeson, and Helen Mirren are all in Excalibur! Corporate malaise has hit Amazon Christopher doesn't like fat mannequins Vacationing at Target Ramaswamy is an idiot or a liar Oh, well, Ohio... WKRP in Cincinnati Christopher is part of the secret elite and he doesn't even know it Golda Helen Miran! In Excalibur! A flaming skull looks better than Nicolas Cage Helen Mirren was also in Caligula, but don't watch it James is a liberal?! Now for politics! Christopher tries to unionize, but no-one shows up Phoenix is too dam hot Scottsdale also sucks (water) The Mick

Goblin Quarterly People forgetting how to be people Tradeshows Christopher takes Fridays off The four day work week Ford invented the five day work week Working nights at Office Depot Corporate sucks Working too long makes for bad work Barbecue Fridays Work doesn't have to be miserable James's four day work week was actually six Are Chronotypes BS? Probably. Christopher breaks his chronotype Europe closes on Sundays Renaissance Faire Devil James is a Thief Kevin Lee: China's white devil Wolf Warrior Netflix is over

Always on my mind The world goes to hell Canoeing trip Democracy may suck, but it's the least worst No backdoors anymore Ocean Elevening a crack writing team Afraid of links Hunting comedians Free therapy and free coffee Bill Dawes Bizarre crazy people The Laugh Factory Christopher forgets how to use Google Maps "It was hip until you drove up" "Hey Bryan!" "...My name's Bill." Surprise podcast! Looking for cameras because Christopher is paranoid, or maybe just weird James doesn't go to bars "Aren't you curious?" "No." Cheers sucked, but Boston was cool The Good Place James went to MIT USA has 3% of the children of the world, but 40% of toys Lego inheritance Don't waste your money on a storage unit James the moving guy Podcasting from the (airplane) graveyard

A Brief History of Time Artists throw-down SubRant No one for Christopher to talk to about art Christopher takes his son to college Covid at Christopher's Vitamins Flintstone vitamin is the best 'Teen Guy' vitamins Snorting vitamins Acai berries The American Diet Too many choices at the grocery store? Americans are fat Are there anti oxidants in coffee? James has a feeling Alcohol isn't really that healthy Christopher doesn't get drunk A 12 pack a night Cider $2 Chuck follow up - not a divorce story (Charles Shaw) Graham crackers and coffee Graham Crackers: 'The anti-masturbating treat!' Gettr James eviscerates Gettr's branding Social media sites shaking down users down for their phone number What is ghosting? Herbal remedy for ghosting Gaslighting Dash Rip Rock - Let's Go Smoke Some Pot Heat Stroke Podcast totally, sometimes, maybe endorses the use of certain unspecified herbal medicines which may or may not be legal in your local.

James isn't angry Antifreeze tastes sweet Christopher will do a taste test of poisons The tyrant that is Christopher Dial-tone PSA Reservoir of hate Italian coffee machines don't work McDonald's milkshake machine controversy Don't sue McDonalds Walmart mountain bikes: "Not intended for off-road use" Bezos sues NASA because he's an asshole "The other billionaire dickhead" Creative destruction Free-ride interviewee The terrible college process - Shots, insurance, grades, verify awards, financial setup, etc... Predatory college loans Student loan forgiveness Discharge student loans through bankruptcy College is expensive because of sports The Nads Christopher needs a little reeducation Full negative James isn't pro China anymore "It's not a declaration of war, he's just being a dick." Christopher and James argue about China Pontica Fiero Race horse takes off and ends up in a burning barn (Bold and Bossy)

First day of school photo School bus couldn't find James's house 'Stranger Danger' is not a thing School starts and Christopher thinks FOOTBALL! James's iPhone 4 drowns Pop Warner Football Phoenix kids can't run in the rain James was an angry kid - good for football The Washington Football team logo was the best James doesn't like a lot of things Piestewa Peak "Patricia Peak" "Stop remembering things I say." Pedantic vs didactic "One man's pedantic is another man's awesome." Christopher ambushes James again with a guest Starting the game with a 5 minute warning Shoes, insurance, and mortuary Friends since 1974 "Let's be clear, I'm not a nice person." Jimmy stole Darron's skateboard and Christopher's 'medicinal herb' Cremation blowback - 'over the top' is not a good line for funeral homes Mortuary business doubled No days off for Darren How many COVID 'customers'? in early 2020 - 1/3 were COVID, now only 1/4 Darren's mortuary saw mostly elderly dying from COVID, but also Hawaiians, Samoans, Philippinos (not overweight) & Latinos, and 30-60 year olds who were overweight No bailout for the funeral home (none needed) Death AND Taxes Philippinos not respecting PPE at funeral home The headshop next door ruined James's gallery insurance Was that supposed to be a joke?

Katherine Corso: Insurance Broker, Notary, & Tax Accountant tel: (360) 519-7516 (please text) email: kc_agent@yahoo.com Coke free household "And a pound of sugar" Don't help Christopher "Thor mode" Red tape and dental plans Healthcare and taxes... Loophole Princess Cruises .01%, 1% ($400K+), 4% Lifestyle vs income DON'T tax food, water, and residence "Government clothing" Part of the body that's not part of the body Cover the basics! Christopher's teacher healthcare story Is it in the morning or afternoon? Price transparency Malpractice insurance A thousand little cuts, PC nonsense being one of them Christopher gets his physical the tax guy (from behind) A little bit of COVID Social media contagion Big tech tracking you in ways that would surprise you "Your fault for reading the New York Times" Concierge doctors Market places and health insurance More red tape "Blurp"

James - the international assassin (retired) Pro tip - don't Instagram yourself before, during, or after the 'job' "Canadians are the worst" "Convert English to English" Christopher is a verbal chameleon "You can convince me of anything, as long as I already think it's right" Over the air digital TV scam Dead air Cardboard gun replicas Lego gun A gun is the basis of the male identity "You ask a utopian question, you're going to get a utopian answer." Christopher's theory on hand guns Gun safety Gun and automobile safety Best Halo players are ex military "Unteach them fingering" Cease and desist yourself, Lego Ford Maverick Vehicle safety Wooden bumper Volkswagon deiselgate Teslas Chip shortages Supply constraints or trade war?

Fat girls + cut guys = Christopher gets into trouble right off the bat "They got the Pelotons out" 'Ball'varia or Bavaria? Norwegian Handball Team fined for their outfit Female athlete harassed for her outfit "A swimming hat" Are the Olympics a flop? Football is fundamentally flawed - too many injuries Is America a violent culture? Does our violent culture make us safe? Red Dawn is a fantasy Canadians drink all your beer Military is dispersing migrants? Travel Agents, good or bad? Rick Steves is so boring he's interesting "Questions are violence" James: "Would you like a beer? Christopher: "Yes." James: "Suck on your coffee, there's no beer here." "Dumbionaires" - dumb millionaires Wiki-yup? James's scheme to get 100% listenership 'SIR' Branson!? take your knights and go home! Why does everyone want a virgin? "A straight shaft with a bulging head, what's the problem?" "Everyone's penis looks weird." Christopher: "How many penises have you seen?" James: "I went to art school..." Is it ominous that all the billionaires are building spaceships to get off the planet? How much does the average actor make? "We're watching Star Trek again, because that's who we are" Spock's father was a Romulan, like three episodes ago The Beverly Hillbillies "Hey kids, smoking is great!" Richard Scarry From the Beverly Hillbillies to space, that's our show Dinosaur bones on the moon - Hank Green ASU's space department Musk is the (space)man, the rest of them are just dumb Clean air is good Confessions of a Time Traveler – The Man from 3036 Christopher watches too much TV Space tourists Christopher: "Not everyone watches Star Trek." James: "Well they should." Bezo's trip to almost space One trip in Bezo's "spaceship" = one car driving 1.8 million miles A Modest Proposal - Jonathan Swift Half of our show is misremembering stuff I'll yell at you next week Go NFL!

Grey wings Venice Beach Homeless in hotels Marijuana vs tobacco Hotel Marijuana Rabbit conservative Rabid conservative = boring and quiet? Do you see the racism? Hispanics are moving conservative Shop classes "Rape the land and exploit your works" BSA Girl Scouts Venice Beach clears the homeless off the beaches Vaccine "Rights" Trump - States on their own for pandemic response Churches step in where the State fails NFL is no longer a non profit James bullies the NFL Homeless 'actors' keep tourists out of Venice Beach Christopher doesn't know Soylent Green Christopher: "Did you watch the Basketball game?" James: "I didn't even know we had a basketball team." Phoenix Suns theme Suns's ape mascot (so naturally Christopher loves them) James rates "the sports" "A bunch of guys going at it..." Hooves over feet Christopher watches Soccer and is not impressed Soccer players scream like little babies Christopher says 'shit' on the show James kicks Christopher in the shins "They're not men, they're soccer players" James: "Can we talk about the Tour de France?" Christopher: "No" "Don't say 'American' football, you communist" Video gaming is racists? No. "Who knows why reporters do what they do." You were killed by Noble Kitty Kat Christopher trolls the homophobes You may be paranoid about how much Facebook knows about you, but the truth is much worse No phone + a mask = totally invisible A house made of coffee

Venice Beach isn't Venice and is mostly not beach 'People' people, water people, and sand people "The most difficult part of this podcast is not insulting you every 10 seconds." Venice Beach's tent problem "I'm a very complex person." Homeless people, keep your shit together Farting Etiquette Ketchup or catsup? Pigtails and a shotgun Modern houses suck A 2x4 is not 2 inches by 4 inches "Why are we talking about wood?" "Maybe if you gave her a shotgun, she would be your friend." The Boonies Why are the Homeless so clueless? Do rural people have better potty etiquette? No Pooping in the street $3K bicycles at Costco Buying a bigger house to store all your Costco stuff People love to buy stuff Loosing track of your breasts Christopher's de-hording escapade Horders' cars are just as bad as the house Buy a bike from your local bike shop "That extra inch makes all the difference." Sun Cyclery Recumbent bikes (the fast bikes) Recumbents banded from racing Arguing the definition of a bicycle Not all Olympic "sports" are equal Aero spokes "The spoke nipple." "What part do you twist?" Brass Monkey Grey Matter Bicycle Sam Kelsall - Iowa bike ride Bike building school James's house as a Venice Beach vibe And some girls in bikinis We were terrible podcasters

James buys a baseball cap Christopher doesn't know how to run Heels were invented for battle Christopher's Amish hat story Southbend Lathes The scourge of Rockler Micron Software bloat - What Intel giveth, Mircosoft taketh away News Stand (Mac newsreader) Macintosh 8100 Don't say SIRI! Amazon Alexa Football ad triggers Alexa, or does it? Fashion is all about attitude "I don't jaw people" James looks like a mean Chihuahua when he smiles Homeless are Robin Hood? Soylent Green Liberals want to fix homelessness, as long as it doesn't effect their real estate value Shrinkage There's a lot of talk about Tech leaving San Francisco, but they really aren't Tempe - flash cube city Does James live downtown? New York is a real city Neil deGrasse Tyson repeats what James just said Dreamy Draw alien correction Aliens, because I want to believe Are we smart enough?

James runs Christopher works out Lance Armstrong vs Jan Ullrich / fast vs slow James wasn t naked Speaking of UFOs Christopher, the paperboy, sees three UFOs It's just a meteor (it's not just a meteor) SR-71 Blackbird "Long fingers that glow" Air Force pilots confirm UFOs "It's probably UFOs" How does a compass work? NASA copper cable Just things in the air We aren't interesting enough for the aliens to actually talk to us It's a book, sir! The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy TV show Oort Cloud "Coming out party for the aliens" Christopher has seen the aliens in Area 51 The aliens did not crash in Dreamy Draw Are we thinking of Roswell? James doesn't like this whole Mother's Day vs Father's Day thing All holidays are just sort of the same now and silly When is the cutoff time for for holiday well wishing? 9pm is the normal cutoff time Folding the newspapers Christopher's newspaper delivery empire Bitten by a dog and struck by lightning Give me my two dollars

Christopher wakes up pissed off Rubbing alcohol in the shoes Teslas are great for sex James hides his Teslas at his secret house If I already have a car, I'm not riding the bus Christopher doesn't rob a bank Checks are weird Christopher went to the bank for money Getting a passport sucks Meat guy accosts Catherine in Costco for wearing a mask Anti-mask bully are "Spineless little slugs" Avoid the nuts Podcasting from James's office Men at Work https://youtu.be/XfR9iY5y94s Christopher goes into a store to buy shoes and hears music Terrible coffee James and Christopher argue over each other's political leanings Bacon up 13% Two Buck Chuck Ted Lasso Only Babylonian warriors get to wear nail polish Housing crisis Reality Winner Falcon and the Snowman Spies Like Us Don't go on a road trip with James Pee and Pizza TripTiks

Video taping comics Cheapskates asking for money back Old man yells at Venmo Mr. Late Shakespeare comic - Gavin Blume Not that Ferman Christopher is sensitive Christopher totally doesn't look like a cop Christopher's Twitter problem Twitter takes out Ellie Kemper, and then forgets her Who pulls Twitter's levers? Twitter to add weather Facebook sucks Fighting a war that we don't know we're fighting Civil War 2.0? Pontiac Fiero Christopher's mailman hates him Amazon's backdoor into your network (sidewalk) Amazon is steeling your bandwidth Amazon is creepy and shitty The death wish cyclist

Spaghetti coffee Don't drink out of a jar James finally has a product in Costco Phoenix is not in France Glass gloop James doesn't eat donuts (James is eating a donut) Old Fashion donut A ring of butter Christopher has enough guns for everyone "Boozeline" Liberating grandad's beer No vaccine, no date Bartender dating app Vaccinated? Masks stopped the flu AOL dating Video dating Alfonzo Vibe (charisma) is more important than looks Antiquated flirting A Scamming Mind Christopher's dating advice Christopher blows up graduations NFL bad Old, rich, and white - a trifecta of diversity Fake diplomas Christopher's fake graduation Baseball is cute IQ tests Star Wars needs to upgrade to Zoom The shrinking work space

Oat Milk in Christopher's coffee Types of milks Christopher farms wildflowers and cotton Luxury cotton nests Recycling fibers James's dog hates him The Christophers go camping Eating mudbugs Lobster riots Ettouffee Bad parents are sucky travel mates Andy Warhol sucks "Experimental" art is just bad art Most influencer American artist of the 20th century? John Williams James's favorite 20th century PAINTERS are Pollock and O'Keeffe Christopher loves art museums Edward Hopper Norman Rockwell The Chinese century? Andy Warhol is a failed pop artist Thomas Kinkade is the real pop artist Art Curators are... just terrible American Gothic Andrew Wyeth Van Gough - greatest painter of all time Everyone, rich or poor, drinks the same Coke Most important 20th century American artist: James - Kubrik & Robert Johnson Most important 20th century American artist: Christopher - John Ford, Danny Elfman Comedians are artists too John Gruber can't pronounce stuff Pontiac Fiero

The Clap Christopher's terrible Star Wars jokes (puns) James respects BonJovi, but doesn't like them 1bigliar TikTok isn't down! Angry black woman still angry and still black Bill Gates gets divorced, why at this age? Windows 95 was fine Apple wasn't great at this point Internet Explorer 96% browser share Chrome is as bad Internet Explorer ever was Brave is fine, but eh. Married, divorced, re-married, divorced, and finally re-married James hasn't used AOL... this century AOL dialup still works? Quaker Oats box filled with AOL CDs Christopher is a proto-hoarder Clutter-pocalypse Garages are for cars Rumpus room Yahoo and AOL get sold for peanuts Jeep baby stroller Harley-Davidson trucks Yahoo and AOL are not poster children for capitalism Poor old Sears Amazon screws the little guy CEOs never fail Company Boards are dumb Moral hazards and capitalism Christopher's auction problem Farmers' Almanac Stealing the Sears Catalog to look at the women in their sexy underwear My parents' weren't getting the Victoria Secret catalog James has weird hangups Winners get divorced? Divorcees are quitters Divorce rates by profession Reasons for getting divorced Men control the marriage in the beginning, but women slowly take over Smart people don't get divorced Post-show Porn is gross Do "adult bookstores" still exist From porn to Disney Bill's porn stash Bill invented the internet for porn Christopher struggles with saying "penis enhancer"

Is 13 America's number? If you're going to be THAT boring, just stay home What did you think? Get vaccinated? Christopher doesn't go the the hospital, except for when he does Doctors are full of shit Our expert opinion on the uselessness of doctors Christopher is waiting to go to the doctor until he is 60 Too many vaccines Christopher doesn't think people are stupid There are no stupid decisions, only stupid people Texas woman convicted of a felony for not returning a VHS tape Renting from the front of the store The Super League disaster (Soccer) (America (the best)) Football isn't socialist What kind of sport ends in a tie? The Phoenix Wranglers (with cheerleaders) Good players got wrangled How many types of (real) Football did we have? Christopher: SportsMan Live sports aren't boring in person Christopher: "Remember when David Ortiz broke Ted Williams record?" - James: blank stare Why is the potato gendered? The Mr. in Mr. Potato Head is actually funny and important The story of Christopher's Lemon Pig Scouts is better without the "Boy" BSA created a lot of the early safety procedures for working with kids Christopher dances around the Maypole Christopher loves (modern) Germans

The mugs Christopher goes to church for the first time in a year Sharing the chalice You don't get sick from the chalice? Vaccination poll (just James) Judge was a bad child Christopher fixes his attendance record Men like women with "presence" James doesn't like kilts Leam Neason can wear a kilt, James can't Christopher's puffy shirt No one likes the Arizona Renaissance Festival (but James) Malinda had a didgeridoo Christopher picks up the drawl Malinda is Scottish If you have the money, you can do anything (none of us have any) Malinda wants to RV the country James warns of the murderous Maine mosquitos Mosquitoes are attracted to people who wear blue and eat bananas Christopher plays the flute The Native America flute is the best Malinda tries to meditate while Christoper's chicken lays an egg Malinda's meditation removes the mental noise "The homogeny of pink" Malinda's non profit Malinda does mediation with schools "Tools for Teens" Reflexology - Meditation - Yin Yoga Meditation trains the mind Music as meditation Sufism https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sufism Teen's disconnectedness has led the sadness Breakdown of manners Faith tied to manners? Is Yoga chaos? James has the best doodles Malinda's Sound bowls Malinda's meditation

Sponsors GoRageous PopSub Podcast Show Topics "Singaporean fruit bat monkey dogs" "They did quite well once they started getting oxygen." Tilting the dog is a diagnostic technique "Do I look smart to you?" "The beatnik sophisticate" Claudia questions James's podcasting technique Writing the medical record is challenging, but rewarding Claudia wanted to be a mechanic Airbag vests for horse riding, but not for motorcycles because, fashion Lithium Grey Bicycle helmets are for suckers "Well when I was in China..." Doing research on Asiatic Black Bears (Moon Bears) for Animals Asia James and Claudia conspire to kill all those awful humans Video taping bears for stereotypic behavior Quid Pro Quo - I'll give you veterinary advice if you give me your professional advice for free too Claudia was raised in an animal hospital barking at dogs Veterinary medicine is way more efficient than slow human medicine James would rather go to a veterinarian than a 'human' doctor Advice for people looking to be a vet - spend time doing it Good vets know how to do a physical exam (but they don't teach that in school) Horses are cool and Claudia loves them Dogs think they run the house, but who has the credit card? Damn Yankees What is with Ben Affleck? How can you like him? Anal Sacculectomy - made Claudia nervous, but her mentor made it easy Alameda East - E-Vets "No, I'd LOVE to hear about you!" Claudia's film career Be your best on set, or you won't be asked back Interdisciplinary teams Best case: physical exam - X-ray - bloodwork = lymphocytic leukemia. Diagnosis in less than 24 hours X-rays are magic, almost as good as ultrasound Some of the smartest people don't test well Advice for pet owners - create a budget for your pet! Vaccines, preventative care, and micro chip Claudia standing on her head in class because she didn't read the directions Patrick Stewart's Ice Bucket Challenge Don't misgender the animal Claudia gives the worst answer ever

Sponsors GoRageous PopSub Podcast Show Topics Christopher and Amarjit - friends since 8th grade High school used to be better Losing fingers is just part of growing up in Arizona Free doughnut! Oh, Crispy Cream... forget it. Amarjt's spicy Chai Tea Ten Gurus - basis of Sikhs Amarjit's travel tips for India Guru Granth Sahib Ek Ong Kar Sat Nam Sikhism - no hell, just self realization Singh for men, Kaur for women - way to dismantle Indian caste system The Golden Temple feeds 100,000 people a day "If it changes, it dies" "The soul is perfect" so don't try to change it, just realize it Self realization is a process of subtraction Slide projector / remove slide to see white light (consciousness) = self realization A "colorful person" is really just neurotic "Are you saying I'm neurotic?" "No, you're not that colorful." Sikh Warrior Crossed swords - one to be the warrior of the soul, the other to be the warrior of world/politics India not really masking up (this is before spike in April) Indians have a different sense of personal space Big red X on your house if you have COVID in India - caused many suicides COVID response is speeding up current trends Kids aren't learning personal skills Zoom and masks both stifle communication Classrooms are now silent BSA to the rescue - the opposite of Idiocracy We all impact the 'Collective Consciousness' Amarjit's Bodhi Tree story - kid is getting all the leaves. Amajit lets go and leaves start falling on him. Amijit's first retreat - He gets bullied "Who is the first victim of your anger?" Don't be clever with people, be generous Fight fire with fire? Maybe try water. Aversion or Attachement Are facial expressions cultural or innate? James channels the GGs Amijit's podcast - The Story of My with Amarjit Singh All the way from India just for this podcast Psychedelics? Oh, yes. Mushroom yogu, but nothing compared to meditating in a cave for 10 hours a day 40 days.

Do you tip the delivery robot? What does a delivery robot do with an undeliverable pizza? Too costly to make people Christopher is afraid of maps Christopher thinks the lightbulbs are listening to him (they probably are) "Your eating habits are really not very interesting to me." 'Smart' devices are listening to your confidential corporate info through your remote workers Our kids use their fancy smart devices for: lights music weather alarms reminders math Uber's "Cupertino Mode" Liberals hate Tesla (good for environment) but love Volkswagen (bad for environment) Google and Amazon replace The Stasis "James time is over." Your monitor can see you! Click this link to see what it is seeing right now! Cheerleader mom deep-fakes the cheerleading squad to make room for her daughter Colorado has a "Day Without Meat" and Nebraska looses its shit 70's and 80's TV shows were terrible, but the show intros were fantastic James drew naked people is collage and learned the human body is not always beautiful "Very heterosexual looking." Miami Vice intro (Jan Hammer and bikinis) PSA: Miami Vice pilot was good, the rest of the show was awful MASH intro Modern shows are so much better, but their intros suck Knight Rider intro Knight Rider's intro narration: "Knight Rider: a shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist..." Battle Star Galactica intro extended https://youtu.be/WtUxDbWcVTc Battle Star Galactica intro narration: "There are those who believe that life here began out there, far across the universe, with tribes of humans who may have been the forefathers of the Egyptians, or the Toltecs, or the Mayans. Some believe that there may yet be brothers of man who even now fight to survive somewhere beyond the heavens." Buck Rogers intro extended - https://youtu.be/BINijYepahA CHiPs intro OK, Christopher was right, James watched CHiPs because of Eric Estrada Magnum PI (the only good show of the 80's) Top ten best tv shows from the 1980's by IMBD The A-Team intro The A-Team intro narration: "In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit..." Tom Selec makes James feel small The Fall Guy intro Get Smart intro is a work of comedic genius MacGyver intro

Tim Johnson Whiskey or vaccine? James threatens Christopher with unpleasantness if you doesn't get the vaccine Where is the best Mexican food to be found? Christopher wears his cowboy hat in London The English eat asparagus with their hands, but they eat tacos with a knife and fork We argue about how to use a knife and fork English eat weird Chopsticks "Who wants to eat their food with tweezers?" "Everyone having knives is just too dangerous." Forks as weapons Women don't like eating in front of other people? "I understand why you don't want them to have knives." Tim is a "getting better" cook Are artists good cooks? Tim is such a good painter that sometimes his own paintings make him hungry James brings 'cognitive sciences' up again... James is getting high off the hazelnut coffee Tim and Christopher are better cooks than James Californian light is magical "The finished product is the residue of my thought process." "Don't worry, it's just art. You're not going to hurt it." We're too tough to take medicine (except whiskey) Tim's favorite artist is Thomas Hart Benton "Holy crap this thing is little." (Stary Night is smaller than you think) Paintings are better in person Italy is a good place to see art Painting is process and problem solving "Do you see yourself as god?" "You're a little god." State of mind of riding a motorcycle and painting is basically the same (in the zone) Tim was born to be wild "The question was a lot more shallow than the answer." Boxer-briefs "Sometimes I don't wear anything." "I want to get one, but they look scratchy." "The best podcast we've done today."

"Outsider" Architecture Greek homes "grow over time" Christopher wants to build a straw-bale home with mud covered walls Navajo fever Joe Rogen Dr. Hotez Feeding America's Hungry Children Feed My Hungry Children Caring Coalition Can't give money? Give your time. It's bad for James to interact with humans (for him and them) Apple TV + Christopher occupied Wall Street James goes all ways (Apple, Android, and Windows) Sony doesn't mix well with others Apple has the dumbest names Christopher hates big TVs Rose Gold and Space Grey are not colors! Benny Hill was cheap and sad, but funny Apple TV + is the new HBO (not an original observation) Charles Schulz - Li'l Folks YouTube is music Foundation Series Coming to Apple TV + Christopher doesn't respect one-liners Christopher, The Sopranos was not a documentary Netflix is slowing becoming the new cable Microsoft Christmas ad "In their own prison cells." - saddest thing I've seen NFL owners are like a diversity rainbow. Of white. And old. And male. "The pre-cryogenically frozen Biden." "Vaccined" Trump vaccine plan vs Biden vaccine plan And we discuss the EU CANZUK Can-Nada Mexico - the 51st state "I swear to God I don't put anything in the coffee." A flag is not a rainbow Glucose? Couscous? Christopher: "Do you remember when we used to talk about flags?" James: "Yes." Christopher: "What happened to that?" James: "You."

Mike Swaine designer and saver of trollies Lost wallet found in Antarctica "A recording of our tedious conversations." Crawdads, everywhere Water-skying the canals Canals are off limits except for dead bodies Drainage ditch or canal? Arizona Falls Canal coffee SuperBall Ad 1947 - suspicious barn fire takes out trolley service 1887 - trolleys start "Chlorophyl hadn't even been invented yet." Mule driven trolleys "If James is wrong, Christopher owes James $100." First trolley line - 7th street to 7th Ave along Washington, then Up 7th street to fairgrounds Trolley museum booted out of Hance Park to make way for a skate park and moved to Grand Ave Disney horse-drawn trolley Trolleys converted to tiny homes - Millennials didn't invent tiny homes Two old trolleys found in trailer park PHXTrolley.org Rosson house Costco Pizza Pizza cheese "It might even be legal." The best Mexican food is in... Italy Artists are good at cooking? "You're not lying, your just wrong. Again." "Artists and cooks are the two worst spellurs on the planet." Is presentation (on the plate) important? One of NINE sibling? Mike's self portrait "You can edit your face." Genrad (General Radio) Mike had a type setting company but sold it all when he saw the Macintosh Press Type guitar James gets off on code 1980 Linus Screen Composer ($40,000?) Trolleys of Venice Beach Moses Hazeltine Sherman Venice Beach paved over their canals The rolling blackout didn't really role... Dark or Milk chocolate? Milk chocolate. This conversation is over. "You can say 'ding-dong', but not 'boob'?"

Allen Henry - Probation Office James's of panic moment James doesn't know the difference between probation and poral "I've had enough of this, just send me to prison." PSA - Phone Change-over James complains about the mug Turns out, getting arrested is expensive Scottdale runs on DUIs Equal opportunity spewers Real Colors - Personality Assessment Gold, Blue, Green, and Orange Christopher is an Orange Christopher's "Pow Wows" James is Green "I like the idea of people, just not people..." "We're not making Easter eggs here." Tea tipper? "As colors go, you're a Californian." Greens don't get caught White collar criminals should just be hanged There are no Robin Hoods, just hoods What, the chair isn't included? Oranges commit crimes It's just a matter of time before Christopher ends up in jail It's not Christopher, it's "Kissy" The Brightening How to speak to and hear people better As a teacher, Christopher did well with the problem kids because, well, he was one. Ankle bracelet kids They don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care Christopher doing home visits in the hood "That's downright brilliant." Allen telling Mike Tyson's what to do What does ear taste like? Muhammad Ali hugs Christopher "Hey everybody, this is my probation officer!" Allen didn't need no sidearm Smooth or crunchy?

James thinks Christopher should wear a dress. A kilt is not a dress. Great Kilt - a survival tool "What the hell is a loincloth?" "A cloth made from loins?" "The Italian size." James thinks the Black Knight scene in The Holy Grail was faked From dumbbell reading level to advanced literature "Those lazy Medieval people and their people cranes." My 600 Pound Life Coca-Cola ad Murals in Phoenix: Redemption Church Alhambra mural by Carlos Rivas Day of the Dead + Basketball = mural Public art anchors the time and place of a community And then we talk about ART... London Elephant Parade WE define "Art" Mineko Grimmer - 1987 "The Point" installation art at El Camino College James doesn't go to see art, he makes it come to him James Turrell James sticks his head into the art Christopher wants you to touch his paintings Art is ephemeral and only silly artists think their stuff should last forever Eurotrash Girl Oversized Popeye. Is it art? No. Con Artists Thomas Kincaid vs Jeff Koons (twitter pole?) The art world is rotten from the top down Damien Hirst's dead shark Computer generated art? England - shark on the roof Film is the best art form We don't like Christo Dumb Phallic is always a thing "Take your vaginas and your penises and go home."

John Fitzsimmons native Arizonian Magician Small talk it too big an idea for us I don't like correcting Christopher because it takes too long Audio problems John is a (licensed) pyro Zoom Magic Easley's Fun Shop Magically curing learning disabilities We were all in the slow class Drink it through your nose Guinness World Record - Most costumes tried on in eight hours Top 10 sexiest women Social Media's impact on magic Vanishing Ink Social media not great for Magic Five years to create a trick - it takes a lot of work to do stuff James has mug shame Brain Games - Seeing what's really there - magic and painting trick you Hypno-disc Seeing Jesus Pink light ruins the Rubik's cube trick Moonwalking with Einstein Solve a Rubik's Cube - John: 1 minute 15 seconds, James: 10 years The Gong Show The unknown comic (Gong Show) Fozzie Bear "You can't have gotten this far in life without wearing dress." Christopher has 25-30 hats John has invisible hair "I only have one wig." "A magician is an actor playing the part of a magician." - Jean Eugene Robert-Houdin Carnac the Magnificent John is a magician just as an excuse to make stuff Super Thought Uploading Psychic Infused Dynamic Hat John magically leaves Comedytrickster.com

Christopher teaches his kids to be rock stars Christopher: the failed architect, James: the failed painter Christopher becomes disillusioned with architecture when he realizes there are not enough beautiful women in the field Phoenix's architecture and more: Metro Center The Pyramid On Central Phoenix Financial Center U of A Biomedical Science Partnership Building Tempe is ugly Frankford is ugly James is ugly MP3.com & lala.com James listens to... Enya and so does Christopher! Natural Wonders Kitaro Far and Way Pontiac Fiero Christopher has army green eyes, except they are blue Boston Legal - Captain Kirk and Odo (inside Star Trek jokes?) Benson 4400 desperately trying not to get cancelled. And Failed. And ruined itslef in the process. Jumping the shark Christopher doesn't respect old people anymore because he is one now Engineering is the application of science Christopher is tired of science changing Don't confuse science with science journalism "The last thing you need to worry about is toilet paper." Women fighting over toilet paper Has religion or science has done more harm? Hydroxychloroquine? Science becomes useless as it becomes politized "We talk to much - that is a scientific fact." Coffee technology just can't do it better than a simple French Press Kuerig cups are more environmentally friendly than Starbucks James whining again about being cutoff Christopher cracks himself up "Little pods of stake."

Christopher builds a halfpipe Eminent Domain leaves a young Christopher with an endless playground Christopher becomes the skate ramp guy Flash is Dead! Long live HTML! Here's your bag, now get out of my house Cheap bastards reusing gift bags Reusing the tissue "If you want to complain about the gift I just gave you, please, go ahead. That just means I won't need to get you one next year." Belligerently reusing gift bags "I don't get these reality shows." Forged in Fire "And Mrs. Howell." Ginger or Mary Ann? (Mary Ann, obviously) Beautiful women from the 60s dying A small disagreement over That '70s Show Mary Ann all day long Knives Out PhotoShop 0.07 Sean Connery - a beautiful man Barry Nelson - The first James Bond 12 year-old girl sues TikTok Lying to get your kids online Omega Man (another minor disagreement) and Legend Soylent Green "I'm not gorgeous like Will Smith." Revisiting Copyright and Patents Don't ask about Mickey's Copyright, they will find you "You were right, I meant I was right." "I don't get chutney." Christopher wants to watch cowboy movies, but Midnight Cowboy and Brokeback Mountain don't really fit the bill

Wohven T-shirt Club unboxing Million-dollar boxer shorts Our sisters are more thoughtful than we are Because we are men? Because we are jerks? Maybe both. PSA - keep an ongoing "present idea" list Need a gift for your wife? Ask her friends Equal airtime for political candidates- on air vs. on the internet Newspapers are obsolete and website slugs tell the real truth Should Tweets be editable? Only a problem for popular people Christopher is only successful as someone else At least they like the fake Christopher, no one likes James - real or imagined James proposes to revoke Sec 230 of the Communications Decency Act Should Twitter "censor" bad speech? Or should it be a platform for radicalization? Were those real Trump supporters? Kavanaugh hearing break in - Google vs DuckDuckGo news reporting Andy Ngo - the antifa specialist QAnon? Ugh. Night hiking and the creepy things (and people) on the trail in the wee hours James rages against fair weather hikers South Mountain Weirdos in the middle of nowhere Christopher meets a friendly Native American "Waiting for a future that will never come and living in a past that never existed." James is scared of Christopher's zip ties Are we woke? No. Hard truth - violence does actually work. The people who should be rioting are too busy working Boredom leads to extremism COS Play extremists - Posers "Humans are dirty dumb animals who just won't listen to reason." Left and Right extremists are both authoritarian assholes It's time for a third party "Libertarianism and Communism are opposite sides of the same coin." "If you have lived in California, you have seen a large number of crazies." "A fairly harmless gun." Gun Talk - another topic James knows little about Rifling is just a way for big gov to trace your gun "This is America, how can there be no bullets?" "If you people would just be a little more sane, we could get to some funnier topics."

Prius free Trump Caravan Christopher: "I start off slow and move into fast." James: "I start off slow and I stay slow." "I like Creme de Mint on my ice-cream." Christopher cheats on James (coffee) Before the sun comes out and kills everyone James is so thoughtful that he wakes up before his alarm goes off so he doesn't disturb the rest of his household MacApline's Creepy high schools James is too dead to have COVID Christopher pranks his friends into thinking the train hit him James doesn't trust his brain Free will is an illusion Christopher smells his way through life Christopher listens to lights Brains, brains, brains Mixed up To Sail Beyond the Sunset and I Will Fear No Evil Where is the thinker of your thoughts Souls are an evolutionary advantage Monsters with blue eyes (blue eye mutation is 6000 years old) Dominant & Recessive gene theory Generational pressure influences which genes get expressed (Epigenetics) The lack of proof is not proof Theists and antitheists are both silly Christopher sings at the ghost The ghosts at San Carlos Hotel love Christopher Everything from the exploration of consciousness to dragon eyeballs

Christopher can skateboard! Christopher is a bad influence on the kids Belly-flop bounce "Blood is manly, urine isn't." James has been mountain biking for 30 years, not because he's good at it, he's just stubborn "I suck, I really do suck." - James "Everything runs on LEDs in the future." "My favorite thing is not responding to people." - James James's son gets a new CPU Christopher "I have a 14 year old iPad." James: "The first iPad came out in 2010..." How to podcast Apple podcast documentation is amazing "We're going to argue over HTML now?" "Flash was a horrible nightmare." "I own the show, bow to me." "RSS works until you get to nitwits like Google." Where to get your short tech questions answered "Can I go into one of my conspiracy theories?" "Oh, please do." Christopher started with Photoshop 2 (he's really old) "I've been playing with it ever since." 14-20 floppy disks... Shhhhh Shhhhh Christopher hacking JPEGs Adobe Ancestor Bag Christopher is James Bond, if James Bond was an aging computer nerd "It's not not clever." Pixelmator Pro ASCII Art Hidden job postings (IT'S IN THE CODE) Don't use online PDF editors "You know how to tell if you're on a creepy website?" "It says Facebook at the top?" Christopher was an AOL Instant Messenger Troll Heathers The Golden God moves from cowboy town to LA "I own undershirts, but they have sleeves for god's sakes!" "This is my friend Tina, and my other friend Tina." -Tina

So old I remember Blockbuster Bootleg books James is tired of paying dead authors James's unpopular copyright ideas Disney's secret Hitler movie "Where the hell is the coffee!?" Christopher: "I use coffee like a drug." James: "It is a drug." Coffee is not gendered James's brother-in-law is shocked, shocked how good James's free over the air digital signal is Christopher gets triggered by NPR, but still loves Science Friday Our podcast is so good that even Christopher listens to it James explains to Christopher how podcasts work RSS isn't so Simple when it comes to Google and Spotify "I hearted my way into science." Tik Tok wins because its algorithm actually cares about what YOU want to see Socialism benefits the people (in theory), Fascism benefits the people in power Christopher can't say "Boob shots" so James has to "Parley? What, am I a pirate?" Parler is the "Entertainment" Right Twitter vs Parler is James vs Christopher Instagram is dumb and only wants to show me dumb things and is totally untrainable YouTube is advertising me to death Christopher likes to watch old TV shows (because he's old) Tootsie Pop ad Christopher educates his kids only so he can one-up Europeans The guy with the shotgun tells you where you can camp Why is it up to James to correct Congress Woman Gabbard? Our brains are not built for the technology we have

Absence of wallet "If you want to assert your dominance over me by paying for my meal, please have at it." "My question, James, is it a labor of love?" How do digital devices drift? We're not smart enough to know. Christopher is the "utility guy", who also writes the press releases Smile at the cheese James's eyebrow is surprisingly expressive Our weekly "trying to be nice to Trump" minute - He is the first true outsider president The US political parties suck and have too much power Perot and Nader Running for President just to sell stuff And now we talk about the First Ladies Carter's peanut eraser Too many jellybeans James is cursing at the players through the TV James is corrupting Christopher Christopher - the social chameleon "Up-talking" No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... Speech mannerisms or, as the educated say - colloquialisms Bleep me Humans are not good at reality I am gorgeous, I am so gorgeous Respect the beverage Pineapple whiskey

Zipper merging Justice on the highway Don't go up against James in a merge "Geometry is my god and I will go where it tells me to go." Kids throwing rocks at Christopher's rear window "I wouldn't say, 'harassing'" Christopher scares the kids while in his boxers The one time Christopher calls the police - when his mother-in-law visits PSA - When the guns come out, walk the other way Gang bangers invade Christopher's neighborhood and the Cops don't really care Christopher again accuses James of looking like Henry Winkler and James throws him out His head is about 30% too big The Fonz is the cool guy? Really? James questions Dustin Hoffman's casting in The Graduate Alabama, you have too many 'A's in your name Alabama's big red X. Not very subtle and not a good look. Christopher and James argue if freedom of religion is freedom from religion Four. Pointy. White. Hats. "A very 'sewable' flag" Alaska, your flag rocks (but the stars could be bigger). Benny Benson, an orphan living in an orphanage designed the Alaskan flag. I mean, seriously! Alaska, you win. "Math is for other people" Vexillology. What? Vexillology. Huh? Vexillology. Say what? Vexillology. Everything Christopher learned, he learned from "A Charlie Brown Christmas" "Don't be subtle with me, I don't understand subtlety" The cleaning crew threw out the "artwork" James loves the '80s, Christopher - not so much Metallica - a small disagreement "Once upon a time, I used to go the gym" "You're not only wrong, you're weird"

"Christopher, is your shotgun loaded at this point?" Christopher is pissed at himself for not being as pissed as he thinks he should be "At this point you are stark raving mad, but you don't want anyone to know that." Christopher didn't sleep well because his little girl is growing up James dreams about Christopher "You like big women?" "Well... no?" I don't like to use the word dumb, but... yes, they were dumb James is into nerdy girls Christopher only likes the smart playboy models James doesn't like Christopher's Intro/Outro Christopher: "It's called dissonance." James: "That doesn't make it any better." "Slap me after, not before" Christopher cracks himself up Christopher tries to explain music to James, but he just doesn't care It's a hit with the youth James doesn't mind getting songs stuck in his head, that's free radio! James is an idiot savant without the savant James admits to listening to Billy Squier and Christopher realizes he doesn't like James any more Christopher laments James's terrible ear Your State Flag sucks Iceland, Greenland, and Arizona Does the blue represent blue? Christopher knows more about your flag than you do Christopher read the whole encyclopedia, James just looked at the pictures We explain to the kids what an encyclopedia is and its implications on social status Macmillan Visual Dictionary (pic) Encyclopedias had no auto update. You lived with what you had. James's father speaks Ancient Greek. Not sure why, but there it is. Christopher is spacey Astronomers on TikTok Ship High In Transit is bullshit - @jesszafarris Shit means shit Beowulf was not written by Shakespeare, but James is too dumb to know that From Beowulf to The Office James takes a hatchet to The Office (American version) You can still steal cars in Rhode Island Cars without USB ports aren't really cars

Bikini Beans - NO Sponge Bob here "The Sweep" or, "Christopher's human evaluation system" Nickle and diming a 10 year old is a bad look "The fuzzy one?" "Toys for children, made by children" James: "I am much less attractive, why are you looking at me?" Maintaining eye contact and ogling at the same time Shoe compliments work better on women than on men "I'm wearing Birkenstocks." Christopher bought his first new "car" when he was 11 years old and it was a motorcycle (Kawasaki KX80). Lying to the PennySaver Christopher's Honda MR50 that his Dad gave him Quirky things from the 70s and 80s - Motocompo - Honda's little motorcycle that fit in their little car Christopher's first "car" - Ford F150 Christopher has destroyed a lot of beautiful cars (1967 powder yellow Mustang Coupe) James's woeful tale of the stolen car How to destroy a car in three easy steps Oh sure, they 'bought' the stereo Our Weekly Public Service Announcement: Cars over 10 (now 20) years old are fair game in Rhode Island A gate won't stop James, he's free range Christopher: "There aren't that many blonde male leads." James: "I guess I'm just not interested in this topic." From thrasher to business man to guru all to get chicks Hippies ended up on Wall Street We all need you Christopher Totally façade Saying something nice about Trump is hard, but James is trying Trump's political success is based on his next level understanding of American TV news media The rural vs urban divide is a divide of language A true tale of racism which turns out to be completely incomprehensible because racism is, essentially, incomprehensible. A suntan is the racial dividing line People like Socialism because they haven't been to a Socialist country Americans are not all the same Parisians are jerks, but the French are OK From Trump to Hobbits Christopher wants to be a Hobbit (or at least eat like one) Giant Snicker bars are not a meal Christopher! James hates candy When does candy stop and chocolate begin? James simply does not understand cotton candy, marshmallows, or candy "There are a lot of different hamburgers out there."

Christopher breaks the toilet at the Children's Museum Not urinating on the seat is like, "base level human stuff" The idea of a tweed suit breaks James Step aside Don Johnson, here comes Christopher (pic) Pleated? Of course! Zoot suit! The suit archive Christopher's kids don't want to wear his old suits... usually. Old Whiskey bottles and dungarees are worth $ The whiskey smashing cat (RIP) that destroyed Christopher's inheritance Old Jack Daniels bottles (pic) James has Lego hanging from his walls (pic) Lego inheritance Luke Skywalker murdered the "nondenominational" Lego Lego Castle & Space Series from the 1980s (pic) Lego X-Wings through the years (but the first was the best) (pic) Skinny Sicilians James does NOT look like Henry Winkler Sexual harassment, or, please more The neurologist triggers James by under weighing him The Carter Hotel NYC Christopher gets "Christ" ribs after not eating for three months Hobbit meal plan Eating dandelions "That's not a cookie" I'm not a weight lifter or a woman Capellini Art school is awesome (except the food is terrible) "That Girl" TV show Is Phil Donahue a jerk? TV personalities and Presidential candidates are possibly not the most stable people Hillary Clinton was the best Republican candidate in years Putin - riding bears with his shirt off (pic) Christopher fantasies about riding a polar bear with the Rumple Minze half naked "warrior" princess If you can see the belly button, it's NOT ARMOR! "As a former Dungeons & Dragons enthusiast..." "This thing called LARPing" Beating the crap out of people with... padded foam weapons That is cool, I would do that. NERF? Oh, wait, no that's silly SCA Is golf Scottish? Who has time to golf? Steve Jobs "These are bad-ass swords" Christopher has an auction problem Christopher wants to live in a castle trompe l'oeil - "A style of painting that is intended to give a convincing illusion of reality" "Don't spell at me" We haven't started yet The toilet seat is still broken, but it looks fixed

Christopher is upset that James didn't notice his new sunglasses or fancy shirt This IS a podcast Doing "Follow Up" makes us sound smart Veterans Day Christopher's grandfather at the Phoenix VA Hospital James loves bad dreams because they are "so weird" and James is, well, pretty weird Don't use analogies with James, he just hears the analogy "I meant a Bud Light" (follow up) 1993 WTC bombings - 6 fatalities and over a thousand injuries (follow up) Christopher wants to "Carfax" the WTC James didn't take Physics but he is really good at it anyway Christopher thinks James is an inventor, but James just makes junk to make his coffee less splashy Christopher worries that keeping chickens makes him sound like a farm boy, but this is Phoenix damn it and that's how we roll Foot mouse? What the hell is a foot mouse? Mechanical mouse balls are, balls Christopher, don't sniff that! Seriously, what is wrong with you?! Grinder sniffs the microphone You can't make me smell that Christopher! James resolves to NEVER buy a used microphone For the love of god, DON'T SMELL THE BALL! Taking offense is optional Victim currency Don Rickles Comedy is complicated, so give them a break Kramer got canceled Comedians in Cars getting Coffee Obama episode Christopher just can't stop talking about his gross mouse James gets violent The mouse's stinky wheels Christopher, did you taste the ball? .... Mennonites have dirty wheels too The foot mouse is OVER! OVER! Contractors are noisy, but if James had a gun... Christopher will smell anything. Except marijuana. Marijuana sneaks out the window Christopher, take your super taster nose and just go home. Catalina island has a marijuana hour "Blunt" James threatens to 'marijuana up' Christopher's car "Roach" America is getting less interesting Even the homeless don't want to talk to Christopher "John does flips on the beach" Art school is getting boring too Chaos is necessary to generate ideas and without ideas culture and civilisations die A little human contact goes a long way Zeus's birthplace is unimpressive. Or maybe Christopher went to the wrong place. Christopher starts talking to goats... and they start talking back. Astronauts and goats The posh homeless Catholic begger in NYC Christopher prefers the front end of the goat

Before we even start, Marijuana We actually vote, like for real McCain and Romney just needed better websites Christopher likes long, boring reads Marijuana Shuttle Challenger disaster and a not very sensitive Bud Light joke reference Comedy, especially jokes about people blowing up is... complicated 1993 World Trade Center bombing Christopher's Mama is so... OK, maybe not Couples that vote together stay together Marijuana Venice Beach will get you stoned James's brother's room smelled like... Marijuana Christopher doesn't know what happened to his parent's bong National Geographic has boobies Marijuana If you produce DVD technology, you're really in the porn business but don't tell Disney Hollywood is sleazy and filled with hypocrites and nepotism Charity giving is really just marekting Opioid charity give-backs Marijuana Christopher hates Marijuana because it's stinky and the billboards are gross and that's why it shouldn't be legalized Marijuana is legal now which is fine, but the actual law is stupid Marijuana Marijuana Marijuana The Salton Sea is a mess that will only get worse and kill everyone in California (Follow up) Christopher doesn't like that a bunch of Californians are moving to Arizona and bringing the silly ideas and stinky Marijuana James Brown, not Chuck Barry was on Miami Vice (Follow up) While Christopher sings and dances, James sits quietly in the corner waiting for it to end Risky Business Fake IDs Christopher's friendly happy time feel good cover band The election that won't end YouTube ruins James's night with election news so he gives up and just watches nothing but Lindsey Stirling videos Key & Peele "This funny thing where we have to breath" "Can we go to Michael Jackson?" "Ugh, if we must." Christopher learns broadcast news sucks The "EyeWitness News" format ruined news, the country, and probably the world Safety inversion

Christopher travels to Chicago just to go to a bar - Go Tavern Whiskey in the lemonaide, tea, and honey... no? Arizona cheese crisp James is (was) bad a dating Christopher's wife is still alive Experian got hacked and they have a terrible website The Salton Sea Horror movies aren't scary anymore, or maybe we've just seen it all before Siri gets smarmy James is too much of a cheapskate to be an alcoholic You are too drunk to taste your wine Almost right nearly every single time Christopher refuses to go on record as to whether or not he has drunk battery acid It's not a lie, it's a 'creative explanation'

1, 2, 3, 4, now I can... are you serious right now? Christopher's "little drawings" UHV Ultra Man Dumb TV shows vs BAD dumb TV shows James is in love with Lynda Carter, the original Wonder Woman Tom Baker the 4th Doctor Who Batman (Adam West) Getting up early to avoid your family and your co-workers Nurses are under appreciated Christopher drops his doughnut and a nurse helps him Bike seats are weird Fat people can be fast too Chris Froome Christopher is a casual cyclist James, no one cares how much your bike weighs (18.5 lbs) Christopher rides down I95 on a bicycle like a crazy person Christopher rides his beach cruiser like a golden god and everyone loves him James drops the mic at Orange Theory Riding (your bike) for Rock & Roll! Miami Vice vs Magnum PI (Magnum wins) Miami Vice, "Missing Hours" with James Brown (NOT Chuck Barry) Re-runs are the gold standard James doesn't know anything about music

Crashed the new "low end" Cadillac James's extra small Prius (with bike rack) Christopher's frat hazed a Yugo The Chinese can't say no Christopher's no big deal near death experience Christopher does not get into Heavan Shirley Maclaine's reality James is a sucky soccer coach New York, like an whole other country Texas is kind of weird Spanish Kings giving away our land The airbag is pink, but my wife doesn't care Christopher loves the idea of James getting his ass beat COVID driving Name the show Bill Bryson - "In a Sunburned Country"

We can count Rock and roll equipment Is that safe? Well...no. Retro-actively billing for sponsorship Christopher and James are not gay Christopher loves gay bars Annoying yard equipment Christopher gets prophetically struck by lightning Trump gets COVID James tries to be good, but is probably a bad person Talking about Covid and climate change as if we are experts (we're not) James makes bad coffee