Podcasts about expectation hangovers

Taking risks is a part of faith and so are expectation hangovers... Disappointment, when we discipline it, becomes reappointment.  When we allow anything and everything to draw us closer to the Lord, we discover He backs us up! God makes a way where there seems to be no way and turns what looks like an impossible situation into a miraculous victory.   The enemy came in like a flood, but God is raising a standard against him in your life (Isaiah 59:19). You will see that the very things that came to destroy you will be transformed into the tools He will use to bless you and bless others through you. Tune into God's Vibes to learn how to deal with expectation hangovers & share this word with someone who needs to hear it!   Get the full word and become a God's Vibes Insider HERE: https://bit.ly/VibesInsider    xo/Juliana   Join Us For 3 Free Events!!

Have you ever wondered how much of your adult life is still influenced by the child you once were? Or maybe you thought about how to better regulate your nervous system?   In this exciting episode of Healing & Human Potential, I sit with Christine Hassler, a spiritual psychologist +  a best-selling author, to explore how our inner child shapes our thoughts, actions, and relationships. Christine + I explore how our past experiences, especially unresolved childhood wounds, can lead to behaviors like overachieving or feeling stuck in relationships.   This episode highlights practical ways to regulate your nervous system, and I share some of my own insights on how taking responsibility for emotional triggers can transform your relationships.   ===   Join the Self-Doubt to Sold Out Challenge – a free 3-day live experience designed to help you build unshakable confidence, attract soulmate clients, and grow your coaching business. Whether you're just starting out or ready to reach new levels of success, this challenge gives you the tools, strategies, and live coaching to unlock your full potential. Don't miss your chance to transform your mindset and take your business to the next level—register now!   Click this link to register: http://alyssanobriga.com/challenge   EPISODE CHAPTERS:   0:00 - Intro 04:16 - Christine's Journey to Overcoming Overachiever Patterns 08:29 - Underdeveloped Masculine and Feminine Energies 21:49 - Nervous System Regulation and Safety 33:27 - Relationships as Mirrors for Inner Child Work 42:23 - Trust Issues and Personal Responsibility 45:12 - Common Inner Child Wounds 48:40 - Subtle Patterns and Blocks 51:03 - Expectation Hangovers and Inner Work 59:17 - High Involvement, Low Attachment   ===   Join the Institute for Coaching Mastery (ICM) – a year-long, ICF-accredited program designed to help you become a highly skilled and confident coach. Whether you're just starting or looking to deepen your expertise, ICM offers trauma-informed training, live coaching, and a proven integrative framework to transform both your personal growth and your coaching business. Take the next step in your career, create lasting client transformations, and build a thriving, impactful business. Apply now to unlock your potential!   Click this link to register: https://www.alyssanobriga.com/applynow   GUEST LINKS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christinehassler/ Website: https://christinehassler.com/   ===   Have you watched our previous episode with Alison Armstrong? Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFKDqVoeg9A   ====   Alyssa Nobriga International, LLC - Disclaimer This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or any other qualified professional. We shall in no event be held liable to any party for any reason arising directly or indirectly for the use or interpretation of the information presented in this video. Copyright 2023, Alyssa Nobriga International, LLC - All rights reserved.    ===   Website: alyssanobriga.com Instagram: @alyssanobriga  TikTok - @alyssanobriga Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6b5s2xbA2d3pETSvYBZ9YR  Apple Podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/healing-human-potential/id1705626495

Relationships are one of the most profound, life-giving aspects of being human. But on the other side of the coin, our relationships can often leave us feeling disappointed, frustrated, and stressed. Many times, improving our relationships comes down to shifting our own perspectives and expectations. On today's show, you're going to hear about the root cause of relationship struggles. Our guest, Christine Hassler is a bestselling author, Master coach, and speaker. Her work is focused on improving relationships, inner child healing, and overcoming past traumas. Christine is back on The Model Health Show to talk about expectation hangovers, how to heal your inner child, and the secret to overcoming resentment in relationships. This episode is jam-packed with empowering tips for improving your relationships and creating the life you want. Enjoy! In this episode you'll discover: How our relationships are tied to our survival. Why relationships are like mirrors. The impact our childhood has on our thoughts, beliefs, and relationships. How expectations can lead to disappointment. Why the ages 0-7 are formative for your nervous system. Examples of how your inner child can act out subconsciously. The different types of attachment styles. What inner child healing looks like. The role suffering plays in childhood development. How staying regulated as a parent can help your children. What an expectation hangover is. The main cause of resentment in relationships. An important distinction between empathy and sympathy. What true surrender is. The power of getting regulated and resourced.    Items mentioned in this episode include: HVMN.com/model -- Save 30% on your first subscription order of Ketone-IQ! Onnit.com/model -- Save an exclusive 10% on performance supplements & tools! Expectation Hangover by Christine Hassler Healing Your Inner Child Workshop Connect with Christine Hassler Website / Podcast / Instagram  Join TMHS Facebook community - Model Nation  Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes:  Apple Podcasts Stitcher Spotify Soundcloud   Thanks to our Sponsors! This episode is brought to you by HVMN. I want you to also keep in mind that our decisions that we make, whether it's in the context of our relationships, whether it's in the context of decision that we make for our health and our fitness, this really does boil down very logically to our energy and to our energy reserves and our energy output. There's this new phenomenon being detailed, this existed forever, but it's being documented in peer view data called Decision fatigue. Because every decision that we make, we're using energy, we're literally using brain glucose and it's draining our battery essentially, and before long, for many of us, once we get to the end of the day, we don't care. You ask us something, whatever. I don't care. What you wanna eat or whatever, what do you wanna eat, I don't care. Our decision fatigue starts to take place, but for many of us, this can happen before the day really even starts, once the day gets rolling, we're already in that state of deprived energy making it difficult to make the decisions that we want to make, and so we wanna make sure, obviously, that we're focusing on a healthy real food diet protocol, that we're moving our bodies on a regular basis, doing our best to stack conditions with our sleep, but what about that little extra?  What about that go to when you want that sustainable, healthy, clean, high quality energy without the side effects of these "Energy drinks or abhorrent amounts of caffeine over and over throughout the day?" Well, there's finally a solution that is taking over the world right now, and I'm talking about ketone IQ. Numerous studies, including a study published by the Federation of American societies for Experimental Biology, found that exogenous ketones can be up to 28% more efficient in generating energy than glucose alone, plus numerous studies have found up to a 15% increased mean power output when utilizing ketones, more energy and being able to get more done, recover faster. And the key here is there's been a recent innovation where we've had ketone esters and lots of folks have utilized those to some positive benefit, but the on-ramp was not that nice because those ketone esters tasted unpleasant to put it lightly. And now with these recent innovations and utilizing this kind of fermentation process to finally have a ketone product that has a decent taste, I'm not saying this is delicious, but it is much more palatable and much more powerful. And that's what you're getting with Ketone IQ. Go to HVMN.com/model to get hooked up with their incredible ketone IQ, they've got these great ketone IQ shots that I actually keep in my refrigerator that even gives it another boost of probability by having a cold fresh out of the refrigerator and a lot of times I utilize them right before a workout or something with a big cognitive load, and it's just really, really remarkable for many people they notice the benefits the first day that they use it. Go to HVMN.com/model for 30% off your first subscription order automatically applied at check out, and also you can get hooked up with free shipping there as well. So again, pop over there, check 'em out. Ketone IQ from HVMN. Go to HVMN.com/mode   This episode is brought to you by Onnit. No lifts, no gifts. Here are just a few benefits of building muscle seen in peer review studies. Building some muscle mass can significantly improve your insulin sensitivity, improve your overall hormone health, improve your cognitive performance, improve your immune system, protect you against injuries and speed recovery and defend your body against age related degradation, this is just a small slice of what a little bit more muscle can do. Now, the barrier of entry to building more healthy muscle and reaching a state of physical fitness, is easier than ever. Having a few key pieces of equipment at your house can absolutely change the game for you. Kettlebells, steel clubs, maces, battle robes, all of these phenomenal multi-faceted pieces of equipment are readily available to ship directly to your door. Go to onnit.com/model and you're going to receive 10% off some of the most premier training equipment in the world. A simple piece of equipment that you can do, dozens, if not 100s of different exercises with, plus they've got incredible programs as well. They teach you different techniques for unconventional training to truly create more functionality in your health and fitness. On top of all that Onnit is also one of the world leaders in human performance nutrition, it got the most remarkable pre-workout supplements and post-workout protein, that you're going to find. All sourced from earth grown ingredients, nothing synthetic, and they have also have put their own products into real world clinical trials to affirm their advocacy. Again go to onnit.com/model. That's Onnit.com/model for 10% off everything they carry. Bestselling author and Master Coach, Christine Hassler, is back on The Model Health Show for an enlightening conversation on relationships. You're going to learn about expectation hangovers, healing your inner child, parenting, and so much more.

In today's solo episode, I cover the difficulties dealing with expectations and expectation hangovers.Be Sure to also subscribe to my YouTube where I will likely be putting the video clips of these episodes. Check it out hereDon't forget to check out The Seasons of Business Membership HereAlso, reviews are greatly appreciated! If you are one of the first 50 to leave a review, you will get a goodie box in the mail (upon tagging me in your IG stories ;)) on IG at @fallon.moranwww.fallonmoran.com

Expectations and the hangovers they can create. That can happen when our expectations, created and assumed, run wild. Join Chuck and his guest host, Mandi Allison, for how to manage our expectations on this week's episode of the Positive Talk Podcast.

The essence of this coaching call is what causes inspirational blocks and the unhealthy ways we try to motivate ourselves. Today's caller, Jo, is asking for guidance about how to tap into her inspiration. The pandemic impacted her nervous system and left her lacking the motivation to live into her purpose.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode416].   Often, what inspires us is the stuff that makes us mad. It doesn't mean we need to come out with anger at people. We need to move through the anger to find the fire and the passion that lies underneath. Then, we can step into the feminine power of discernment and discover our Warrior Woman. Which is a beautiful place to be. When we do this we allow ourselves to be pulled forward by a calling and a mission, versus looking for something external to motivate us.   Women, in general, are not great with our anger. It leaks out in certain ways but we are not great at tapping into our rage and anger and letting it out in a healthy way. This blocks us from our passion. And if we keep suppressing our emotions, rage, and anger we will feel depressed.   Plus, we tend to motivate ourselves by being hard on ourselves and looking at what we think is wrong and the changes we need to make. We believe if we make ourselves miserable enough then maybe we will be motivated to make a change. That is a strategy that doesn't work or only works for the short term. It allows our inner critic to run the show and we burn ourselves out.   When we realize we are not doing anything wrong and that we are living our purpose because we are learning, growing, healing, and raising our consciousness, it releases the feeling of failure.   If you resonate with this podcast and Christine's style of coaching, Elementum Coaching Institute is the coaching certification program for you. Even if you are not a coach, and want a personal transformation program to give you coaching skills you can use with your employees or peers, in relationships, or with children, you are encouraged to apply at ElementumCoachingInstitute.com. Enrollment closes September 1, 2023, and the course begins September 14th. This is the final course for 2023‒2024.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you feeling a lack of inspiration? Do you feel you had a setback during the pandemic and you haven't been able to come back from it? Do you want to feel like you're making an impact, that you matter, and what you're doing in the world matters? Are you someone who benefits from connection with other people? Are you an extrovert who isn't connecting with people enough?   Jo's Question: Jo is asking about how to find inspiration and motivation for herself and her business in the here and now.   Jo's Key Insights and Ahas: She gave up her teaching job to write a novel and build a coaching business. She moved in with her parents. The pandemic impacted her nervous system. She has difficulty spending a lot of time by herself. She wants to do something meaningful. She gets overwhelmed with business tasks. She is trying to motivate herself by being hard on herself. She wants to be inspired by life. She has finished her novel. She signed a lease on an office. She is an extrovert. She lived with depression for a long time. She longs for freedom, transparency, and truth. She sees her anger as a negative. She started her business after she found self-compassion. She is joining Elementum Coaching.   How to Get Over It and On With It: When she feels trapped in the moment, consider what choices are available to her. Put herself out there to get connection and support. Tap into the fire beneath her anger and be motivated by her deep desire. Start using her voice again. Join the upcoming Signature Retreat, read Expectation Hangover, or visit ChristineHassler.com/angerrelease.   Takeaways: Consider — Is there a part of you that wants to be free and believes that if you do what you want bad things will happen? Get to know your anger, feel it, and understand it.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

We can and must overcome disappointment. With her book, "Expectation Hangover," Christine Hassler shows how instead of wallowing in regret, our negative feelings can open new doors that lead to powerful and profound inner transformations.Support the show

In this episode, we're talking all about expectation hangovers - what they are, how they happen & how to recover. If you love this epside, please share it on Instagram and tag me @courtney_amber Links: Apply for 1-1 Life & Fitness Coaching: https://form.jotform.com/222575856865068  Follow me on Instagram: www.instagram.com/courtney_amber  Follow me on Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@courtney_amber 

This episode is about being open to opportunities by eliminating the walls we have up. Today's caller, Rich, feels blocked in building his coaching practice but the session is not so much about building his coaching practice but about him becoming his own best client because his biggest blocks are his own beliefs and unresolved hurts.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode377]   We are told many things in our lives. Some of those things are not always positive. We tend to take on criticism much more than the compliments and acknowledgments we were given. Especially if that criticism came from a parent or any authority figure. Those criticisms from our past repeat like a broken record in our heads and impact our future. So, instead of living the life we want, we keep listening to the old story.   Whose voice is in your head that you have adopted as your own? It is time to give that voice back and not allow it to define you.   How we do anything is how we do everything. Many times we try to change our external circumstances thinking that a new job or new relationship will change the patterns and programming of things we don't like. But, if how we do anything is how we do everything, then we just apply the same patterning and programming to the next thing.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you suffering because you cannot identify your purpose? Is there a person in your life who is struggling to find their purpose? Do you push them to find their purpose or try to find it for them? Do you feel worthy and deserving inside? And, how does your self-confidence, or lack thereof, impact your results? Is someone else's voice inside your head? Do you need to banish it?   Rich's Question: Rich would like to know how to get over his fear and anxiety to follow through with his goal of becoming a coach. He wants to overcome his limiting beliefs from his past, which may be blocking his future success.   Rich's Key Insights and Ahas: He was providing his coaching services for free. He feels friends and family are expecting more of him. He is getting married soon. He suffers from social anxiety and has a hard time focusing. He meditates and exercises to deal with his anxiety. He has a mission to make an emotional impact on people's lives. He was criticized as a child by his stepfather. He struggles with self-worth and fears failure. He is a sensitive creative. He has done work around self-compassion. He is not sure of the source of his resistance.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Do emotional healing and forgive himself for buying into the misunderstanding that he is not worthy. Realize the way he is treating himself is how his stepfather treated him. Treat himself like he treats his clients. Work through the emotional section of Expectation Hangover to release his anger. Consider what makes him authentic and worthy. Design a program for himself and become his best client.   Takeaways: Write down your limiting beliefs and figure out who owns the voice. Move into compassion for anyone who programmed your thoughts. Write a letter to give an unwelcome belief back to the person who gave it to you. Be honest about the emotional walls you have put up and be committed to taking them down. Set up two chairs and carry out your own therapy session.   Sponsor: Air Doctor — is an air filter and air purifier that creates the healthiest environment in your home. It filters out dangerous contaminants and allergens with an ultra HEPA filter that removes 99.99% of tested bacteria and viruses. If you want to get an Air Doctor today go to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code “Overit” and get up to 35% off on selected models.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Last week to kick off this two-part special, we explored the culture, economy, and education systems that built the millennial generation. If you haven't heard the first episode yet, I recommend going back to start with that first (https://link.chtbl.com/022a2-MX). Today, we're digging into how “financial literacy” shifts reality on its axis, who the “winners” and “losers” are in our economic era, and why scamming has become a quintessential millennial pastime (Fyre Festival, anyone?). To top things off, we've got a super thought-provoking conversation with Gaby Dunn of Bad with Money fame (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-with-money-with-gaby-dunn/id1144712710).  It's a veritable Magic School Bus ride through the wild terrain of 21st century America: Even the centimillionaire megachurch preachers and girlbosses squeezed into tiny seats and threw spitballs for a few stops. — Mentioned in the Episode Malcolm Harris's Kids These Days: https://www.littlebrown.com/titles/will-collyer/kids-these-days/9781478992332/ Study on financial literacy and retirement: https://sjes.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s41937-019-0027-5 UC Davis study on poverty: https://poverty.ucdavis.edu/policy-brief/transitions-out-poverty-united-states Money with Katie blog: The Paradox of Riches, Being Poor is Expensive: https://moneywithkatie.com/blog/the-paradox-of-riches-being-poor-is-expensive Pitchfork Economics' interview with the author of The Nordic Theory of Everything: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/capitalism-is-working-better-in-finland-with-anu/id1445901378?i=1000536840437 2020 Census data: https://www.census.gov/content/dam/Census/library/visualizations/2021/demo/p60-274/figure3.pdf The Money with Katie Show episode on financial independence: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-money-with-katie-show/id1589146097?i=1000551967021 Jacqui Shine of the Los Angeles Book Review: https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/wont-get-fooled-again-malcolm-harriss-kids-these-days-human-capital-and-the-making-of-millennials/ Jia Tolentino's Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/43126457 Trick Mirror review by Miriam Francisco: https://www.michigandaily.com/arts/tolentino-refuses-simplicity-trick-mirror/ Graph on financial inequity in the US: https://realtimeinequality.org/?id=income&incomeend=03012022&incomefreq=monthly&incomegroups=Top%2010%25&incomegroups=Middle%2040%25&incomegroups=Bottom%2050%25&incomegroups=Total&incomestart=01011976&incometype=factor_income&incomeunit=Adults&incomey=growth CNBC feature on Jeff Bezos and the critique of billionaires: https://www.cnbc.com/2021/07/20/jeff-bezos-says-critics-of-the-rich-going-to-space-are-mostly-right.html The Financial Independence Planner: https://moneywithkatie.com/financial-independence-planner Forbes Advisor study on medical graduate debt: https://www.forbes.com/advisor/student-loans/average-medical-school-debt/ — Follow Along - Listen to Money with Katie here: https://www.podpage.com/money-with-katie-show/ - Read Money with Katie: https://moneywithkatie.com/ Follow Money with Katie! - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moneywithkatie/ - Twitter: https://twitter.com/moneywithkatie - TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@moneywithkatie   Subscribe to Morning Brew - Sign up for free today: https://bit.ly/morningbrewyt Follow The Brew! - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/morningbrew/ - Twitter: https://twitter.com/MorningBrew - TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@morningbrew

In this episode with Christine Hassler she tells us her stories from every age range of her life, her wisdoms and lessons working with a coach for 14 years beginning in her mid twenties, building an international speaking business in her late 20's and 30's, how she has built 7 different income streams and created harmony among them all the way to now, with her near 6 month old Baby Athena. There's so much more in this episode and I'm stoked for you to dive in! Watch this episode on video here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1NnbY3B90yvZ0OAj825ftu?si=1jrPFwXsSdeGJh1XsVgS6w Or on Youtube here: https://youtu.be/6h9qHo9LTyc Learn more about Christine's upcoming retreat at www.ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat Listen to her podcast at https://open.spotify.com/show/4QE9mMUthBRDP3IKPJQkrN?si=03b7b5985b674913 Pick up Christine's latest book Expectation Hangover here: https://www.amazon.com/Expectation-Hangover-audiobook/dp/B00N9HTJC6/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=christine+hassler&qid=1662526241&sr=8-2 Find Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler Find Skip on Instagram @SkipKellyFilms --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/wondersoulshow/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/wondersoulshow/support

Control is something we all struggle with. We think we have 100% control over life, but we don't. We do have choices and dominion but we don't have total control. Our egos like to have certainty and to have a plan, which is rooted in fear. It is scary not to know what is coming next. If we try to control every aspect of our lives, we often miss out on all the beautiful opportunities the universe has for us. Sometimes the opportunities come in the form of challenges, which are not to punish or test us but to help us grow. During these times it is important that we do not go into victim mode. It is also important that when we go through uncertainty we don't try to immediately fill up that space with something new. Sometimes we just have to sit in the discomfort of uncertainty to see what it is there for to teach us. If we don't deal with our Expectation Hangovers they will keep repeating and the same types of disappointments will keep coming up. It's OK if you don't have it all figured out. A quarter-life crisis is normal. It is the time when many of us step into our personal life journey. Challenges are what build our grit and character. I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 3 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs. Subscribe in iTunes | Stitcher | SoundCloud | Android | Google Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you having a quarter-life crisis or an Expectation Hangover? Are things not going according to plan? Do you relate to living off a checklist? If things don't get checked off are you hard on yourself? Is external achievement and validation important to you? Are there things you say you are surrendered about but you're not? Are you still trying to make things happen or have you just resigned? Frankie's Question: Frankie would like to know how to move into a place of acceptance about where she is in her life. Frankie's Key Insights and Aha's: She has a should list and a checklist in her head She has a deep strength within her Her identity comes from what she can achieve She is hard on herself more than she is compassionate Love for her is connected to validation and praise How to get over it and on with it: She should consider who she would be at 49 if her life had no struggles She can pray without asking for something Her self-talk needs to move towards love and acceptance She can delve deeper in her spiritual practice She should update her story about who she is supposed to be Assignments and Takeaways: Listen to my story in my very first Over It and On With It Process your emotions through release writing and the temper tantrum technique in Expectation Hangover. Do not pray for things but pray to be shown the way. Be nice to yourself. Ditch your checklist. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E–book Expectation Hangover 20 Something 20 Everything @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com

Learn to say NO. Set clear expectations. Manage communication. That's the cliff notes.

Do you exhibit a type of behavior or personality trait you don't necessarily love about yourself? It could be moodiness or it could be being extremely judgmental or it could be an emotional state you have a tendency to default to like sadness, worry, anger or fear. Women often have a difficult time dealing with anger because we have not been encouraged to express it. We may default to sadness which limits us from reaching our passion and our fire. We suppress our emotions and any big emotion we suppress will eventually leak. Anger becomes irritability, sadness becomes depression and shame comes out as insecurity. Suppressed emotions can also lead to physical ailments. It is not healthy to suppress our emotions.    Today's caller Monica acknowledges her own moodiness and is wondering if it is something she can change or if it's a fixed personality trait. She suppresses her anger and doesn't speak her truth. If there is something about you that does not feel good to you, like moodiness, you can change it. You just need to uncover why it's there in the first place. Moodiness can be a messenger that you may be suppressing pent up anger and frustration. It is liberating to express your anger and be free of the moodiness. I invite all of you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in Los Angeles in July for my signature retreat.      Consider/Ask Yourself:    ● Is there something about you that you would like to change? Is it an inherent part of your personality or do you believe you can change it? Are you willing to do the work to change it?    ● Do you experience times when you are irritable or snap at someone? How do you express your anger?    ● Do you feel self-expressed? Do you fully feel your feelings?      Monica's Question:  Monica recognizes she is a moody person and would like to know if she is able to shift out of it or if it is part of her personality.      Monica's Key Insights and Aha's: ● Her moodiness stems from suppressing her anger     ● When she speaks her truth she feels shut down    ● She has trouble expressing herself     ● She doesn't like conflict    ● She becomes the victim, as a coping strategy      How to get over it and on with it:  ● Realize her irritability and bluntness are actually inner anger leaking out  ● She should do the Temper Tantrum technique and 32 days of the Release Writing technique, which are in her copy of Expectation Hangover  ● She should step away from the conversation and get her anger out, on her own      Tools and Takeaways:  ● Identify the ways you may be leaking. Know where you are suppressing and how you may be expressing it in other ways.       ● If you sense you may have anger you have yet to acknowledge, start Release Writing.    ● Work through the emotional section of Expectation Hangover, in particular, the Adult Temper Tantrum and Release Writing techniques.    ● Speak your truth and process your raw feelings to eliminate suppression.       Resources: Christine Hassler Expectation Hangover @christinhassler on Twitter@christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com

In this episode of the Digital Business Evolution Podcast, Jess gets vulnerable and talks about how she has learned (and is still learning) to navigate the differing opinions of the people in her life.  This is an episode we all can relate to and, as always, Jess provides actionable steps that you can walk away with feeling empowered to face some of the challenges that relationships bring to our lives.    Key takeaways: understanding the importance of the roles people play in your life the 5 most important mindset shifts that help you navigate unsupportive friends and famiy compartmentalizing vs cutting people out   Quotes: "we're all on our own journey at our own speed" "people are in our life for a season, a reason, or a lifetime"   Episode Resources Want me to coach you over text? Text me on Tuesdays at 973-358-7836 Do you know YOUR Superpower?  Take our free quiz to find out! https://www.jessglazer.com/quiz "Expectation Hangover" by Christine Hassler                        Buy it here-->  https://amzn.to/38Mg4x8   About Jessica DeRose Jessica DeRose is an entrepreneur and business mentor, who helps coaches build profitable online businesses. After quitting her 8-year career as an elementary school teacher and creating a multiple 7-figure business herself, Jessica is here to unlock doors you didn't even know existed.   Connect with Jessica Instagram: @iamjessicaderose | @thedigitalbusinessevolution TikTok: @iamjessicaderose    

This episode is about never feeling good enough and always looking for what could go wrong. Today's caller, Dana, didn't have her needs met as a child and built a protective pattern to help her cope with her abandonment wound. We work through ways to calm her nervous system and feel safe when asking for what she needs.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode356]   Whether or not you grew up in a house where you felt like your needs were not met, all of us can relate to feeling not good enough, or the feeling that things in our lives are not good enough. Or, we can be either incredibly critical of ourselves or other people. We get ourselves into a vicious cycle.   When we have unmet needs, especially if we were raised in a way where we couldn't have an outburst, had to be the good kid, or had to keep it together, it caused us to keep stuff inside. Those of us who had to withhold a lot as children can be mean to people internally but when it comes to saying something externally, we cower.   When we have awareness about one of our protective patterns, we don't want to expect that we are immediately going to change it. That would just set us up for an Expectation Hangover and offer us more opportunities to beat ourselves up.   The purpose of personal development is not an overnight transformation. As evolving human beings, personal transformation is more about gaining awareness. We can spot the patterns we fall into and then work with ourselves while we are in the pattern.   True transformation comes when we find ourselves in the trigger, habit, or reaction and we become aware we are in it then, we choose differently.   My next Women's Retreat will be held in Austin on October 7‒9, 2022. I will post the website and open enrollment soon!   Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you have the feeling of never feeling good enough? Do you constantly look for what is wrong in a situation, or what could go wrong, and have a hard time finding peace and joy in what is? Did you grow up in a house where your needs were not met and you have a hard time communicating your needs now? Do you have a hard time being present and slowing down? Are you always thinking of what you have to do next?   Dana's Question: Dana would like to understand why no matter what she does or achieves it never feels enough.   Dana's Key Insights and Ahas: She is an achiever and is viewed as blessed. She finds fault with her husband in almost everything he does. She is always thinking about what comes next. She has an abandonment wound from her alcoholic father. Her mother was very young and always working. She over-achieves as a protective pattern. As a child, she always wanted to be accepted, heard, and understood. She looks for what is wrong so she can prepare for it. She has never had her needs met and is a bit angry because of it. She is afraid to trust the good things in her life. She is waiting for her partner to disappoint her. There is an intimacy-affection need that is not being met in her relationship. She needs a strong circle of friends around her. She doesn't feel worthy of friendship and connectedness. She craves intimacy. She doesn't know how to celebrate success. She holds a lot of tension and is often on edge.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Work with her protective pattern and know it is safe to trust the good in her life. Practice opening her heart and being less judgmental of herself. Focus on contentment and allow herself a moment to relax and feel relief in the moment. Breathe love into her heart and belly and tell herself she is safe. Bring conscious awareness to what she needs.   Sponsor: Cured — If you feel anxiety or that it is hard to go to sleep, you may want to give Zen a try. Zen is formulated by an in-house herbalist and is all about being calm and relaxed. To help you sleep and regulate your nervous system, Zen includes Reishi mushrooms, magnesium, CBD, and more. Go to Curednutrition.com/OVERIT and use the promo code OVERIT at check out for 20% off.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

The heart of this coaching session is about self-compassion. Steve has been in his masculine and repressing his pain for much of his life. Another level of his pain is surfacing and that's because his unconscious knows he is ready to deal with it. If you are at a point in your life where you feel like you have done a lot of personal growth work but pain is resurfacing in your life you do not want to miss this episode. It takes a lot of energy to repress pain. And, that's why it feels hard to move forward in our lives, it feels hard to get a career off the ground, or to connect in relationships because we are unconsciously suppressing a lot of pain. Pain wants to come up and out. Our bodies don't want to hold terrible memories or trauma inside. Our unconscious mind wants to let it go. So, it continues to make us feel uncomfortable until we deal with it. Not just mentally, but emotionally as well. It may be difficult to go back and to feel the pain of your childhood but you are feeling it anyway, 24/7 — it is just repressed. It is healthier to go into it and feel it fully with self-compassion so it can come up and out. When pain doesn't have a way to express with compassion, it sits inside you dormant and continues to drive your choices and behaviors. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you feel like you have hit a point where things were going well but old stuff started to come up? If you are a man, do you have difficulty feeling vulnerable? Do you judge it as weakness? Is vulnerability awkward for you? Maybe, it's OK for others to be vulnerable but it's hard for you? Do you trust yourself? Do you trust your decisions? Do you feel safe with your pain? Do you find yourself jumping to forgiveness too quickly? Are you able to mentally understand and justify things that have happened in your life but you notice the pain is still there? Steve's Question: Steve is struggling with worrying about what other people think of him for what he believes to be the first time in his life. Steve's Key Insights and Ahas: He's always had to prove himself. He has tried to be different his entire life. He joined a gang as a teenager. He hasn't forgiven himself for betraying himself. His experience built loyalty. He is able to relate to many different types of people. He has a warrior spirit. His girlfriend was murdered. He didn't have a relationship with his father. He is in the process of up-leveling. He wants to eliminate his pain completely. How to Get Over It and On With It: He needs to quit judging himself and create a space to be vulnerable. He needs to trust himself more. He needs to spend time feeling his feelings. He needs to do the emotional section of Expectation Hangover. He should write down what being a loving father to himself looks like. Sponsors: Express — No time for an outfit change after work? Express rewrites the rules of dressing for a job, with style by delivering fashion-forward essentials to your door. Express has pants, work tops, dresses, and more. Listeners to Over It and On With It will receive $25 off when you spend $100 by using the code ‘Christine' at checkout. Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Watch Christine Hassler on YouTube — Hit Subscribe! Christine's Personal Mastery Course Expectation Hangover Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Christine's Books @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — If you want to be a guest on this show.

Expectations of self and others clearly have a profound impact on how we measure success, disappointment and effectiveness of others or ourselves.  It comes down to one major thing.  Clearly communicating expectations. Then receiving expectations.When we assume others know what we need or think or expect we totally set things up for disappointment.  I love the book Expectation Hangover and wanted to do an episode in alignment with my book chapter 5 on expectations to dive deeper.  There are a lot of assumptions that tend to be sent and received by us.  The clear expectation being specific, timely, respectful and compassionate (to impact of others) set in a way that is responsible will have significant impact.  The expectation received and assumed without getting clarity causes extra stress, juggling and more than likely more hours worked.  https://angiemccourt.transistor.fm/episodesListen on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, Stitcher, Amazon Music, Listen Notes, Audible, SoundCloud, iHeart Radio. A big thank you for Follows, Likes and Reviews.

Let's talk about finding the “one”. You know the magical person who is your soulmate, your other half, the one who completes you. I say these things with a tinge of sarcasm but I don't inject the sarcasm because I am jaded or don't believe in love, it's there because of the misunderstandings regarding soulmates and the pain many of us go through when it comes to romantic relationships. I believe there are lots of “ones” out there for us. My definition of a soulmate is someone who helps our soul to grow. Sometimes it's through a gut-wrenching break-up, sometimes it's through dating someone who triggers us and sometimes it's through someone who just comes in, loves us and holds up a beautiful mirror to  remind us of who we truly are.  Soulmates can be romantic partners, friends, colleagues and even someone you share a plane ride with once and never see again.   So, why are many romantic relationships so painful? 1. The relationships are mirrors which can trigger unresolved issues from our childhood. 2. We often look to a romantic partner to fill our needs that our parents did not meet. This doesn't attract the best people to us. 3. We may want a relationship so badly to fill our voids or make us feel less alone that we move into a fantasy-based relationship.   Today's call with Michael is a beautiful example of masculine vulnerability and strength. He finds himself dating from a place of pain rather than from love. He wants to move past the feeling that he needs to prove himself to women. Michael's mother wasn't really there for him and so he ends up with women who don't treat him well and who are not really there for him. This is the problem with trying to fill a void left by a parent through dating. We long so badly for the love of a parent that we attract someone just like them, which re-opens our unhealed wounds. We have to bring love and forgiveness to those places inside and fill ourselves with our own loving acceptance. It's time to let go of our fears about rejection, abandonment and getting hurt.  I have a free gift for all of my podcast listeners. Here is how to receive my free ebook and meditation downloads. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you longing for a soulmate so much that it is causing you to suffer? Do you keep dating the same person but they have a different face? Could issues from your childhood influence who and how you are dating? Are you in a fantasy based relationship? Could it be time to remove your rose-colored glasses?   Michael's Question: Michael wants to know how to move past the pain of a previous relationship and how to know when the person he is dating is the right one.   Michael's Key Insights and Aha's: He is trying to heal a core wound from his childhood through a romantic relationship He is putting a lot of pressure on the women he dates He realizes he keeps running back to fix past relationships He carries fear and his unanswered questions around with him He feels unworthy and feels he needs to prove himself to women His strength is in his vulnerability, his honesty and his courage   How to get over it and on with it: He should forgive the misunderstanding that he is unlovable or anything in his past was his fault He needs to re-parent his younger self in a way he always longed for  He needs to take a dating hiatus  Assignments and Takeaways: Is there a little boy or girl inside of you that has some misunderstandings which really need to be healed? Could it be time to end or transform your fantasy-based or issue-based relationship? Perhaps it's time for a dating hiatus and taking some time to date yourself.    Fall back in love with yourself and realize just how lovable you are.    Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book Expectation Hangover @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com

This episode is about overcoming the pain our inner bullies create. Today's caller, Ravi, was bullied as a child, and uses his inner critic as a protective measure. He became isolated and disconnected from his intuition, and he cut off listening to his heart because he didn't want to feel.   [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode82] When we cut off our feelings we not only cut off the pain, but we cut off the love and inspiration as well. What happened in the past does not have to create your future. You can get over it and on with it, but you must be consciously committed to letting it go.   To transform, you need love, wisdom, and compassion from your heart, and alchemy. I guided Ravi through a heart meditation, like this one from a Coaches Corner episode. Ravi experienced clarity after the meditation. His heart said it wanted expression through art.   The next step was to transform his trauma and pain, but Ravi said he didn't want to go there. Remember, the fear of feeling pain is what keeps you from transforming it. It is possible to alchemize passion, or suffering, into something you love. It takes a lot of energy to suppress pain. If you have had trauma, it can be scary to go there on your own. You should find someone to work with, someone who can go there with you to hold a space for you.   The more you listen to your heart, the more it speaks to you!   Join me this September at my retreat in Bali. Visiting a magical place with like-minded people will transform your mind, body, and spirit. It's a unique experience where you can experience significant healing that will last the rest of your life. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up.   Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you trying to figure out your issues or challenges in your head? ● Were you bullied, teased or criticized as a child or a teenager, and it still haunts you today? ● Do you have a past trauma you are terrified to address and feel? ● Would you say you live more in your head than in your heart?   Ravi's Question: Ravi wants to know how to find purpose in his life.   Ravi's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He disconnected from his conscious mind to cope with the trauma. ● He internalizes the external bullying. ● He's scared of failure and being made fun of. ● He has managed his pain, but has not yet transformed it. ● He is in an avoidance pattern and protective mode. ● He's been in the midst of self-loathing.   How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He should tap into the passion he experienced to create art. ● He could help other people who have been bullied. ● He needs to listen to his heart. ● He needs to start alchemizing his pain. ● He should practice release writing when he feels sadness.   Assignments: ● Read The Lesson Quest and Your Life's Purpose in Chapter 9, The Spiritual Level in Expectation Hangover. ● Be honest about what you are attempting to figure out, and alchemize it. ● Listen to my Coaches Corner with Jim Kwik. ● Volunteer and be of service to someone else to help you with your inner critic.   Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Over It and On With It Listener Survey Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page

In today's episode we look at the difference between high vibe vs high energy! What it is, how to tell the difference and what happens when we mislable people in our life (or even online). We dig deeper into expectations and what that can mean for us.

Christine Hassler, Master Life Coach and best-selling author of Expectation Hangover, discusses how we can stop cancel culture at its core and subsequently break our own victim mentality and feel our emotions with compassion instead of self-judgment.Guest Links:Website: www.christinehassler.comIG/FB/Twitter: @christinehasslerChristine's Podcast, Over It and On With It: http://christinehassler.com/itunesCristine's Inner Child Workshop: www.christinehassler.com/innerchildFor 25% off The Fitness App by Jillian Michaels, go to www.thefitnessapp.com/podcastdealFollow us on Instagram @JillianMichaels and @MartiniCindyJillian Michaels Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1880466198675549Email your questions to JillianPodcast@gmail.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A story of possibility. A story that shows taking small actions leads to large realities, that you have been gifted a specific skill set, and that a person is never just one thing. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:The beginning of Awesome Blossom, Fabulous and Fantastic Taking your power back by recognizing your purpose Using your gifts to pursue excellence Small goals to achieve a large dream How to figure out your life purpose Episode References/Links:InstagramTwitterCall Me BlossomBrittaney Chatman Website  OPC Flashcards:OPC Flashcards are on AmazonOPC Flashcards are on our site  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.  ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Social MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey, Be It Till You See It listener. Welcome to the show. What's up? What's up? Okay. Wow, this is a really fun episode. I actually really enjoyed... I was smiling the whole time like I couldn't stop smiling. She is so much joy and you're gonna hear her introduce herself like, oh yeah, you can picture how much joy she is. This is one of those divine appointments, those divine moments of meeting someone because actually, I was randomly in New York in the fall, I got to see Clare Solly you remember her from one of our episodes in the beginning? She's my slingshot friend. And I said, "Yeah, I need some more guests. I need some more unique guests that like really are gonna inspire people because I, I think like we need to hear more stories." When you hear more stories of possibility. And we hear more from more people who are still in the works of it. And she's like, "Oh, you got to talk to Brittaney Delsarté." And I was like, "Perfect, great, do the introduction." And not only that, we get the intro happening within like five minutes of her saying her name, but she'd already scheduled her up and I was like, "I love it. She's a take action person. I'm in." We are recording this during Retrograde. So you're gonna hear some little Retrograde Gremlins taking over her internet. But I the the interview is so good. That just no like it's a word here and there. It's not it's a whole sentence not going to drive your ears crazy. And she has so much love, joy, positivity, and drive. And if you are someone who's like, "I wish I had an ounce of that." I want you to listen because she shares her tips along the way. She shares how she makes it happen. And I really just loved her actions items at the end. They're so honest. And they show so much possibility and they're really like, the this journey we're all on is not linear. Y'all, it is not. And we talk a lot about that in this interview as well. So here's the deal, you are amazing. And I know you're scared. And I know sometimes you don't know what the next step is. But if you can just get freakin' clear on what you're wanting to be in this world. Who you are, it's gonna happen, you're gonna look back and go, "Whoa, look at that," you know. So so I really I really I know, it's I know, it's not easy. I know that every day, there's something weird that happens. I swear. Like, one day, we got a link that was working and in the next day it's not and I'm like, "Why is this happening still?" You know, or one day everything is going really great in some relationships. And the next day, there's an argument and you're like, "What, how did that happen?" And it can be distracting and you can go these things just keep popping up, life keeps getting in the way. And I think it's important that you know, that's all part of the journey you're going on. And it's all part of what makes you "you" and it's what makes you actually stand out and this makes people feel comfortable talking to you and sharing their story with you and and supporting you. You know, we always say it here and nobody wants to be friends with perfect. So stop trying to be perfect. Allow it to be messy. And, and and wear, wear some sunshine, find out your power color is, you're gonna hear about Brittaney's in this episode. So I'm going to stop talking so you can hear the words from her. Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening. Thank you for sharing every episode. It really does make a huge differnce. I'm on a mission, okay and I can't do it alone. And that that means you, means you sharing each episode that you love that brings something to you that teaches you something. If you could text it or post it on Instagram or share it wherever you love to hang out that is going to help other people hear this podcast. So here you go after this brief message, Brittaney Delsarté.Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.All right, Be It babes. Oh my goodness. I have someone so special for you. She came to me by way of a very special woman. We'll talk about her in a second but we've got Brittaney Delsarté and aahhh she is such a bright light and such a joy in her smile... I get to see her smile. If you're watching on YouTube, you get to see her smile. It's just making me have a better day, already. So Brittaney, thank you so much for being on the Be It Till You See It podcast. Can you tell everyone, who you are and what you're up to these days?Brittaney Chatman 4:45  I, well, thank you so much for having me. First of all, I wore yellow especially for you. Yellow is my energy color. So I'm giving you the the awesome blossom color. All glow energy of life today. (Brittaney laughs)Lesley Logan 5:00  You are, you're such a sunshine. (Lesley and Brittaney laughs)Brittaney Chatman 5:02  I try, I try. I mean and we're also in the middle of Mercury Retrograde. So I just feel like everybody just needs some some light, some positive vibration, so I'm here to bring it. Hi everyone, I'm Brittany Delsarté. Awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic. It's my brand. I'm an artist and multi hyphenate person. I'm producer, I used to be a journalist, you know, just exuding black girl magic.Lesley Logan 5:30  Ooh, (Lesley laughs) you are, you are. And oh my goodness, I know. While we're recording this, it is Mercury Retrograde. It's like, "Come on," but also the podcast interviews never stop, you have to do (Lesley laughs) whatever's happening. So, so okay, you called yourself "awesome blossom" all these things? When did, when did you become this? You were in, you're used to be a journalist and now you're doing music. So like, what was the journey? Can you take us down the road?Brittaney Chatman 5:55  Yes. So awesome blossom started, I was in a pageant when I was in middle school. And the person asked me to describe myself using four words. And off the top of my head. I was like, "awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic." And ever since then, it just stuck with me. But of course, you know, with throughout my life trajectory so far and when I reflect back on, you know, just being that that bright eyed, bushy tailed kid with pigtails and glitter in my hair. Just dreaming of being an artist and just being this multi hyphenate person and see where I am now, I realized that that that name Awesome Blossom, it has a different meaning for me now, because I'm just with in my life, I've I've experienced highs and lows. Right? But it's always, I've always found it fascinating how I've been able to hold resilient through all of the things that I've gone through, and still been able to just set my dreams to fruition. And to do it with excellence and to do it really well. Even though I've, I've hit a lot of obstacles and a lot of you know, curveballs have come my way. So when people say, "awesome blossom," I'm like, "Yeah, like it is because I'm able to do all of these awesome, amazing things. And yet, I'm still learning. I'm still growing. I'm still evolving. So, I'm still blossoming," (Lesley: Oh) you know. Yes.Lesley Logan 7:24  I have so much, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like loving it because first of all, we all have the obstacles, right? Like, it's just a nature of the game. And I think sometimes, some of us can like rise through those obstacles. And sometimes we let those obstacles get us and it just depends on you know, what you've been through and what you've said resiliency, and I want to say like, when you say awesome blossom, it almost helps you like even if you're like hit an obstacle, it's like, "I'm awesome blossom." You can't, you can't not go to the next thing. Right?Brittaney Chatman 7:53  Yeah, exactly. And that's what it's about, it's about, you know, taking your power back, and realizing that, you know, if you, if you know your life's purpose, and you know what you're supposed to do, you cannot afford to just stay in this tight bud. Like it that is almost too painful than it is to go out and just take a chance on yourself. And whatever it is that you want to achieve, you know, so you can do it. I mean, awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic. Have that confidence and know that you will get from point A to point B, if you just keep working at it.Lesley Logan 8:23  Yeah, you're... yeah, I'm like, I feel like everyone's gonna start going around, "Awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic." It's like a little new mantra, we can all say. And I you know, I have to just point out she said, like, you can't, we also survive, we can't stay that way. It's actually really painful to stay that way. You know, what are like, can you think of a time where like, maybe you were letting yourself stay in your bud shape? And like you you finally got through the blossoming part. Like is there any point in your journey that you kind of just felt a little nervous? Because it is hard and scary to go up against the obstacles.Brittaney Chatman 8:53  Yeah, absolutely. Um, I want to say I've always been someone that has never, I've always been fearless. And, I give credit to my family for that, they always nourished my dreams. Anything I want to do if I said, "I could believe, I could fly." They'd be like, "Okay, girl, we know you can. And how high do you want to fly?" You know what I mean? (Brittaney laughs) So when I moved to New York, I actually left my career as a journalist. I was in news broadcasting, and actually got my startup at CNN, at 21. (Lesley: That's insane.) So that was my first... Yeah, it was ...Lesley Logan 9:30  Go big or go home. It's like, that would be the scariest place to start being a journalist is like, at the like, pinnacle of like, where everyone wants to probably be as a journalist.Brittaney Chatman 9:39  ... pinnacle. Exactly and that's where I got my start, that's where I learned. And I had just graduated from college, University of South Carolina. And I was like, "Okay, but why am I not taking these full time positions?" Because deep down inside, I knew I wanted to go to New York and you know, achieve my dreams and see where I can, what I can do with my art and so I got into grad school moved to New York, and 2018 I graduated and I found myself. Billy Porter said it perfectly. It, he called it being an a... "In the Precipice of Obscurity." And I felt myself being in that place where it's like, alright, you know where you want to go, but you still, but you can no longer see the road ahead of you. I'm someone that's a futuristic thinker, I can visualize something futuristic and see the outcome. And it may not come into fruition until months or years later. But it got, it came to a point where I was like, "I'm not sure what direction I'm supposed to go in." And I think it's because I might have experienced postgraduate depression, where you graduate, and then you see other people have started getting married, (Lesley: Yeah) and having families and yet you're still trying to break into such an industry that's tough. Like, you know, there's so many people that want to pursue acting and, and singing and, you know, not everyone makes it. And that's just, you know, that's just me being realistic. And it got to a point where I felt like I was relying more on my, you know, my degree because then I went into marketing and advertising just to survive in New York, because it's expensive here. (Brittaney laughs) So (Lesley: Yeah) you know, I got to a point where I was just like, "You know what, like, it... What if I never, what if I'm never able to leave this? What if I'm always going to be here? And the reason why I came to New York is in vain?" So I, I became fearful, it got scary. But music was the thing that healed me and brought that life and vitality back to me. I felt like I just needed to uplift myself, I recorded my little rap song "Call Me Blossom." It was not meant to be taken seriously at all. But all of these people started coming in the studio. And they were like, "What is this song? But I can hear this on the radio, like, this puts me in such a good mood, like, I love this song. I can't get it out my head. It's so catchy." And from there, I was just like, "You know what, like, I really enjoy the process of making the song. And it was healing for me." So I just decided to keep going. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And it really it was the music that sustained me and brought me back because being in New York, I don't have family here. And, you know, I I felt like I was I didn't know what I was gonna do. I was like, "Please give me the courage. Let me just figure out what I needed to do to reset." And I think like creating this album, like put me in a place of like, "Oh, now I remember why I'm here. Now I know what to do. (Lesley: Well...) Now I know how to get back to me."Lesley Logan 12:38  I mean, I just want to so y'all, Brittaney and I were introduced ... Clare Solly, who is my slingshot friend. We are each other's slingshot friends and she moved to New York. And it's true, like it gets really, it's like LA, it's everybody's there with a dream. And it really is those who like keep at it. It's it's it's not as you can be the most talented. And if you burn out, if you give yourself only six months, you'll you know, like it's just like, it's just time being there consistently and showing up. And I love what you said about Billy Porter's like, "In the Precipice of Obscurity." It's like, it's it is really hard to be there because it's such an uncertain place. And it's, and it's you don't know the road ahead, but you you like have an idea where you want to go and so I freakin' love that. You know, what you just said. How, as you were describing that what I, what I heard is like, you'd be you said, "I came really fearful," and you were a fearless person and then you started taking some action. I always say like that "action is the antidote to fear" that when you take some action and so here you are not a singer yet, not doing those things you went to school for and having what I think Christine Hassler calls it like "Expectation Hangover," like having graduated (Brittaney: Yes) is amazing thing you should be so proud of, and anybody else back home be like, "I'm so proud of her." And you're in this place of like, "I'm lost. I don't know. I'm gonna just go back and do these things, because I need to make some money." But when you took this action of going down and making the song, whatever it was, like, the fact that you were like, "I don't even, it's just, I'm just gonna go have some fun. I'm not even gonna, I'm just gonna do this thing." I think that's where the magic happens because I every time I hear someone stories, I hear the fear. And then I hear action was taken, and then something blossomed from it.Brittaney Chatman 14:18  It's true. And the beautiful thing about being an artist and the beautiful thing that I just admire about all artists is that, you know, underneath this, this strong or fearless exterior that a lot of artists have is a lot of vulnerability. And sometimes we use that to serve other people. We want other people to come and get a cathartic experience from us that we don't use a lot of that power for ourselves. (Lesley: Hmm) So for me to go into the studio and to actually write the songs and compose the music and to arrange and to really use a lot of those gifts for me, and it wasn't about like, "Oh, like how many impressions can I get? How many streams I could get?" It wasn't about that it was just about the experience itself. And just writing and really seeing how, you know, the way that I think, the way that I feel, the things that I want in life. How it's changed. How it's evolved. And how I can really pull myself together again with my gift, to, in order to empower myself to get back to that relentless pursuit of excellence, "Girl, you've got this. Trust your gut. It's magical," you'll always put yourself in a position to blossom that way, if you just trust your instincts, and allow your, your gifts to nurture you sometimes. So ...Lesley Logan 15:37  I think that's such (Brittaney: Yeah) a great call to action. And I what, what I was thinking about as you're saying, that is, there's gonna be someone listening is going "Okay, but thanks, ladies, I don't, I don't actually want to be a professional singer." And what you're saying is like, it's not about making the money on that gift. It's about using the gifts to fulfill you first. And I like, I think, you know, you said it, like we do things that other people have an experience. We're doing all these things to make sure that other people feel good, that other people are taking care of. And so little are we doing things to like, make sure we're fulfilled, that we're our, our cup is filled and so I really think this is very beautiful. Can you tell me, so you're you're rapping apparently. (Lesley laughs) I'm in the (Brittaney: Yeah) presence of a rapper. (Lesley laughs) So okay, where I'm with your music, because that's what you're doing now? Are you, are you, are you showing up into different like places to sing, open mic nights? Are you being invited? Like where are we at on this journey? Like, what's the next step? Are we, are you just kind of like seeing what happens? You're being famous and fantastic and see what lands in your place?Brittaney Chatman 16:40  Yeah, so you know, I'm a Virgo. So there's always going to be a strategy in place. The way that my brain works like, there, there's a method to the madness. So last August, I actually dropped the EP, it's called "Call Me Blossom." So just five songs, just to you know, give people an introduction about me and who I am and not only hasn't given me a artistic rebirth, but for me, I want people to understand where I come from, because yes, I moved to New York, but I'm a Southern girl. So the songs are, are about just my southern roots and my upbringing. Umm, what, you know, my 90s childhood, you can tell that a lot of when you listen to my music, a lot of the the sounds that drift between R&B and jazz and hip hop and dance pop are a lot of like, 90s inspired. Right? And just my poetry. So when I released that in August, I released the music video for the first single, which was Southern Life. And the video did really well it got about 65k views. I just (Lesley: That's amazing.) before... Yeah, thank you. So, so before Christmas, I actually went and shot the music video for my second song, which will be called "Talk to Me." And it's going to drop in February. And I thought it would be very fitting because you know, the song is about love. And it's just about when you finally meet someone, but they don't really want to articulate what they will bring to a relationship because they don't know if they actually really want something long term and sustainable. My song is saying, "Ah ah no. Before you get with me, before I make any commitments to be in the relationship, you're going to have to articulate to me what you're, what you're willing to offer me. Because if I can do that for you, then you need to do that for me." So with that said, with that job, I am planning to do something really special because we're still in a pandemic and I'm still nervous to perform live. So I am going to do a virtual concert. This will be my first one. Um, I'm in the works of producing that with my team (Lesley: So good) and they will... Yeah. And then we'll see what happens but there's definitely a plan and that's how I do it. Like I just allowed myself to have small goals. So the first goal was just, "Alright, like release the EP, get it out. Alright, now let's release the music videos. Alright, once that's released, alright, let's do a live concert so people can enjoy your your music live and get that experience (Lesley: Yeah) from you." And then the next level is, "Alright, like, let's get these deals. Let's see what, let's pitch. You know, let have (Lesley: Well...) the material, show them what you got."Lesley Logan 19:15  Thank you for sharing that because I do think people think, "Oh, you release an album you get a deal." And when I can't wait for Brad to listen to this episode because he it wasn't, when I met him he was in a band, he was in a pop band. (Brittaney: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) And and, you know, so I have seen like the behind the scenes on that and it's it's it's hard y'all, but what I love how you broke that down because even if you're not like here, listening to this to release an album y'all, like listening to her. She's like, "Okay, I'm just gonna do this small goal. And then I'm gonna do this small goal." And that (Brittaney: Yeah) really does help boost your confidence because if you look at the whole big picture, get get on stage, book a deal, get an album out there, get representation, it can feel like impossible and also hard to see how far you've come? Because until you hit that goal, you've achieved anything, but you're like, "Nope, I'm gonna just write a song. And then I'm gonna record a song."Brittaney Chatman 20:09  Exactly. And you know, the beautiful thing about being a multi hyphenate person is that I was really able to take all of the skills that I've learned and developed over time. I always tell people, the beauty of being a multi hyphenate is that one domain and seizes the other. So I really took my time to say, okay, like, well, I don't have to hire people to market for me or to help me create my brand because as a marketing advertising person, that's what I do on my own. I have a communications degree, I know how to write so I can I know how to pitch myself. I can do my own EPK's. I can do my own social media marketing campaigns. You know, like, I can create creative, direct my own music videos. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) I can executive produce my own projects. So I really took all of the things that I've learned over time, and really invested into bringing this project to life. So I really took my time with it.Lesley Logan 21:05  So for the, for the listener, who is like, "What is a multi hyphenate?" They might be thinking like three last names. So can you, can you share, like, what that is? Because I actually, what I'm loving is that you basically wrote down like, "Here all the skill sets I have." But can you just, can you just break it down (Lesley laughs) for the person who might not know if they are one or not?Brittaney Chatman 21:25  Yeah, you know, and I'm still trying to figure out how to, like, break that down. But I always tell people, like I consider myself to be like a millennial renaissance woman. Because being a multi hyphenate just means that you know, you, you don't just settle for one, one career (Lesley: Mm-hmm) industry or one career field that you can jump between multiple industries. So (Lesley: Yeah) for instance, like, yeah, like I, I am an actress, I am artist, but I was also in the journalism field as a reporter, (Lesley: Mm-hmm) and as a news producer. But then when I graduated, I went into marketing and advertising. So it's just being able to, (Lesley: Yeah) balance multiple careers at one time.Lesley Logan 22:08  Yeah. Well, and also, it's like, the beautiful thing about that is you don't have to like just be one thing. And I think back, it sounds like we're about the same age. I'm an elder millennial, though. (Lesley and Brittaney laughs) Yeah, well, it's... (Brittaney: Where? Where? Why?) Y'all, my birthday is, in two days from this. I'm very... I don't know, when you're listening to it. It's been, it's been passed, but you can wish me happy birthday. But, um, yeah, no, Brad and I are elder millennials. And I have a funny story about about that. But at any rate, I think like, you know, my mom is a teacher, my dad was a manager. Like to, like, you know, back in the day, you had like a title. And now because, like, because of the way the world works, because at how things industries change, because we're allowed to go, "Hey, I only have to work here for four years." You can experience all these different things, and some people would see that as, "Oh, my God, look at me, I just keep switching jobs," and see it as a negative thing. And instead by saying, "I'm multi hyphenate." (Brittaney: Yeah) You're like basically to me, you're like owning all the experiences and show, and using the tools from that to help prepare your career forward. And I think that's really cool. I think if we all stop beating ourselves up for like, changing jobs so much and actually saw it as like, nope, the stepping stones are all going to equal up to like having this handbag of awesome, awesome tools you can use (Brittaney: Yeah) as you need. Right? I think that's really (Brittaney: Yeah) fun. Yeah, no, (Brittaney: Yeah) I was at okay, so I was (it was, gosh when was this?) probably like 20, I don't know, 14 15. I was in this like at this cafe in Montecito, California. Y'all, it's like a tinier town from Santa Barbara. (Brittaney: Oh, wow.) It's like we're Oprah's houses and like Prince Harry. It's like this specific town. Right? So I'm at this the only brunch spot and I'm sitting there working on my computer. And this guy looks over and I mean, like I definitely dress like a kid from the 90s still like you know like I'm an elder millennial. So he looks at me goes, "Are you a millennial?" And I said, "Yeah. I am." He's like, "I knew, I knew you people worked." (Lesley laughs) Like we work a lot. Millennials work a lot. (Lesley laughs)Brittaney Chatman 24:13  You know what they're just mad because the week we're at this point in our lives where we're not just gonna stay on some job and be miserable just because it we make good money, okay? You'll be lucky if we turn into two weeks notice. This is a lot worse and we just know that rest is revolutionary that's all ... (Lesley: Oh, my God.) We just learned from the baby boomers and said, "No, we're gonna just do it. We just got to switch it up so that you know we can have more fulfilling lives." No, you know no shade to the baby boomers but you know.Lesley Logan 24:42  Yeah, but I think (Brittaney: It's evolved over time.) I I love it. Rest is revolutionary. Oh my God, and he's going to wall but you're, (Brittaney: Yeah) I mean, I think like, I think it is we get to learn from the people who came before us and that is the best thing we can, the best owed to them that we could do is go, "You know, that doesn't look so fun. Didn't look like you're all a bunch of happy people." (Lesley laughs) You knowBrittaney Chatman 25:02  Exactly. (Lesley: Yeah) Exactly.Lesley Logan 25:04  So but I just think it is, I love what you're saying. I think if you're listening to this, it's like, look back and write down all of the best skill sets that you had from every job. I used to be a barista, you know what I was really good at getting people to do? "Put whip cream on that." Like, I was like, "It's only two calories, you can do it. (Lesley laughs) "Enjoy, (Brittaney: Exactly) have some fun in life." But I was a barista. And then I worked at a doctor's office and I then I worked in the mall, and I had, like, all those things lead you up, and they give you some experience that allows you to see the world from a different place. And that's a skill set. And you don't have to do it the way that other people did it because you're different. And I think that's really, really cool.Brittaney Chatman 25:42  Exactly. Thank you, I appreciate that. I just, you know, from and I think to the reason why it's probably so easy to do that it's because I've just always been inspired by the future and what it could be. And growing up in my household for about eight years, I was the only child. So there was just me, and my wild, relentless imagination. And so I was able to energize myself with the visions that I've had in my imagination along with what I wanted to see for myself in the future, and then just easily turn those visions into thoughts and then those thoughts into action. And so I always tell people that I'm like, as long as you understand what your life purpose is, or you discover that, then the rest of it is really just easy. It's all about implementation at that point. You know, I, I've always wanted to live a life in artistry for as long as I can even remember. You know, I've always wanted to sing, and write and act and dance and direct and play instruments. And, you know, I understood that, okay, like, I feel like my purpose is, yeah, I just want to express the truest highest expression (Lesley: Yeah) of my creativity, and I want to use that to nurture and to heal, and to just, you know, relate and be of service to people. So as long as I knew that, I figure, alright, as long as I put myself in positions, to be able to make that happen, then I can just trust that, the universe and the spirit will meet me in the middle. And together will will bring it, will bring whatever visions I have to life together.Lesley Logan 27:15  Yeah. So okay. Um, couple people are listening and going, how do I figure out what my purpose is? I don't know, how to, how like, is it something that you journaled, meditated on? It came to you in a dream, like, where like, how do you if people are to ask you like, "How do I, how do I figure out my purpose is?" What do you tell them? What worked for you?Brittaney Chatman 27:38  Wow, well, you know, I, like I said, I was raised down south, and we're all about community and gathering, and my family, something that we, I mean, I'm just really grateful that we, that we've been doing this is that we gather in the living room or in the kitchen, and we talk. And, you know, my family is always like, ask me questions about "What makes you happy? You know, what do you love to do? Like if you do it was taken away or made you feel like a zombie or that you was just a shell with no life? Like, what would that thing be?" And really allowing myself to write into journal about that. And, yeah, that really helps. And I know it sounds cliche, oh, journal like that. But no, or either ask your friends or ask your family members, like, "Hey, like, what is it that you see in me? You know, that could be helpful in a particular industry." You know, like my sister, you know, I always tell her, she's a, she's a Cancer. Right? But I've always known that she she had this thing about her that's so nurturing, and she's soft spoken, and she's able to, she has this ability to get people to relax and to, to be calm, she has this calmness about her. And so I always believed in speaking life into her saying, "You know, wow, like, you'll be really good at working with children or older people." And now she wants to become an orthodontist and work with kids and then she also wants to be a counselor. So I have people do that for me too. I just have people even down to like the elementary schoolroom nurse look at me and go like I could see you you know, using your voice for good, you know, you just whether it be through song or a public speaking like this, there's just something about you that when you speak openly you stand on a stage people pay attention (Lesley: Yeah) and people constantly speaking life into you. So I think it's also to surrounding yourself around people that you know see something in you and not afraid to speak life into you and to let you know, because that's also can help him be affirming. Lesley Logan 29:50  Yeah. Oh, I mean, there's so many great things in there. I really, (Brittaney: Yeah) I really love that your family ha... I'm like sits around ask these questions to each other. I think like you know, I almost think like for y'all who are still single, listen to the questions people ask on dates and notice when you light up. Because, like, you know what I mean? Cuz sometimes like maybe your family is like, I don't know, watching the television and not asking people questions. But like, start to ask these questions are really great discussion questions. I was thinking, like, bring them on a, on a car ride sit in traffic, "Okay, what are your three favorite colors? What something you like..." But no one knows about you those kinds of things. And notice what comes up, notice what sticks with you. But then you also said, you know, listen to what other people are saying about you, listen to what they notice about you. Because I think we, we are too in our heads around others. And we're not noticing, like, what we're actually putting out there and what they're receiving. And, and it's just feedback, y'all, you also don't like you can also go, "No, I don't think so." But like, listen, because it might, it might spark a thing or, and I know people think (Brittaney: Yeah) journaling is so cliche, but like, I find journaling to be so freakin' relaxing and like it gets the stuff out of my head. Like it just get it out there. And it's like, "Okay, now it's now their space in this room."Brittaney Chatman 31:04  Exactly. And that's what it does, especially if you're someone who's over analytical like me, and all you Virgos and even Aquarius is like, we got to, we got to work on that. (Brittaney laughs)Lesley Logan 31:16  I know, I know, like, I know, that's... Hello, hence the morning pages and the breath work and the multiple to do lists everywhere like it's, and then I'm like, "I told you that." And they're like, "Nope, never did." And I'm like, "Oh. You're probably right." (Lesley laughs)Brittaney Chatman 31:31  Exactly, exactly. But it helps, it helps put things into perspective. And also, when you go back and read those things, sometimes it gives you a aha moment. Talk about Oprah, like, I love when she says like, "Oh, I had a aha moment" because it's true. Because I've gone back in journals and look back and go, "Oh, yeah, did say that I wanted to do that. And like this makes so much sense. Now I understand why I went down this path instead of this path." You know, so it's just, it's an amazing thing to do when whenever you can write these things down, and then go back and read them because you, you kind of see like, wow, like, the way that I've been charting my course, is, is is telling me that I need to go into this direction, perhaps this is what I was meant to do. This is what I was born to do. Because I noticed that from 2001 when I started writing and seeing what happened in writing now, this just makes sense. And this always has been a constant steady thing in my life. (Lesley: Yeah, you're...) So yeah, it's a beautiful thing.Lesley Logan 32:33  You're you're right. I mean, like I love the vision board. I need to collect some magazines and do another one because I made a vision board in 2013, y'all and then like, I live in a 500 square foot apartment. So I didn't want my vision board out for like every stranger come through. So I like put it in a closet. And when I pulled it out, like a year later, it was like almost everything on that vision board had been dealt, like done, like and I wasn't looking at everyday, (Brittaney: Wow) but I just made it. Right? And so, you know, it's kind of it's really fun. I've kept it. I still have it. Gets moved with us. Like I'm like this is the original. (Lesley laughs) This is the best one. Oh my gosh, Brittaney, I could talk to you forever because you're just I mean you are sunshine. But you're also full of so much positivity and enthusiasm and I want our listeners to hear. Alright, Brittaney, where can they find you, follow you, listen to your music? What's, what, where do you hang out the most?Brittaney Chatman 33:25  Yeah, so you can follow me on Instagram at @brittandbroadway - b r i t t and broadway. I'm also on Twitter at @AwesomeBlossomB. I'm on LinkedIn, I'm on Facebook, you know, Brittaney Chatman, just type it up and I'm there. Also, if you want to stream and tune into my EP - Call Me Blossom. I am streaming on all platforms. So whether it be Spotify, Title, YouTube, whatever it is that you use a stranger's services, please look me up. The support will be amazingly cherished. Lesley Logan 34:02  Yes. Oh, I love it. I love it. I love it. I'm gonna, I'm gonna listen to it. Actually, I'm gonna make and extra Brad does too because I'll be so fun to talk about you and the song when we do our recap. Okay, so people are in love. They're like, you're like the positivity queen and you're just making magic happen in your life. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps do you have, advice do you have for people listening to this? What should they be doing to prioritize themselves?Brittaney Chatman 34:28  Mm hmm. Wow, um, you know what? Yeah, it's okay to give up. You can give up. Just don't quit. You know, if the elevator stops, just get off and take the stairs. You know, um, when you're, when you're happy. And you're doing things that are in alignment with you. When you're not giving in, when you're not settling. That's when everything starts to happen. So that is why you cannot quit. And also, I would say that, you know, it's not about being dependent on anyone else to give you your heart's desire. It's, it's the work that you're putting into it. And when you decide to plant those seeds, you'll start to see that everything else will unfold, and you will see success, just do not stop. And don't have your expectations so high, especially for people because people will disappoint you. People will undermine you. People will invalidate you. But you have to shed, those people shed those relationships. You need to have people around you that's going to lift you up and speak life to you, and encourage you, believing you're all individuals that you believe in. And if they're in a room without you, and they hear an opportunity that can help you that they will not be afraid to throw in your name. Right? So have those people around you that support you a village, a tribe, a creative tribe, any any type of tribe, it doesn't have to be artistic creative tribe. (Lesley: Yeah) But you know, especially if you are though, in the industry, the entertainment industry at at large. Um, you know, this is an industry where you want to get noticed, and it is about getting attention, but you got to understand that you're not meant to be of the norm, you're not meant to conform at any means to make people follow you. So, understand who it is you are, you have to constantly decipher what you want, and, and what's important to you, because nobody will be able to take that away from you. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) And the other thing that I'll say is, you know, especially I just want to talk to women, you know, we are so celestial. So we we deserve a place in, in any space, whether it be business, corporate, you know, the art, education, you know, we are really able to advance the collective growth, especially of women in any soci... in any platform, at in any society at large. Right? So just stay true to yourself. Understand your power and never let anyone take that away from you.Lesley Logan 37:24  Beautiful those are some bold and an intrinsic BE IT action items if I've ever heard them before like that's beautiful. Thank you Brittaney for being here. Everyone, how are you going to use these in your life? Like what, what stuck out to you. Do as a humungous favor, screenshot this episode, tag Brittaney and myself @be_it_pod on Instagram, so we can see those, we can cheer you on, so we can be part of that group that's like, "Yes, you got this." And, (Brittaney: Yes) and also so that other people who need to hear these words, can because it's so much easier when everyone around you is being it till you see it.Brittaney Chatman 37:59  That's right. That's right. And thank you so much for having me. Like I really enjoyed... You're right, I could talk to you forever. It's such a safe and fun space. So I appreciate that.Lesley Logan 38:11  Ah, well, thanks and I cannot wait. We'll have to do another, we'll have to have one with you and Clare on. Ah ... (Lesley laughs)Brittaney Chatman 38:17  You want and me Clare together at once. Oh gosh, (Lesley laughs) trouble.Lesley Logan 38:20  I might not get a word in edge wise. (Brittaney: trouble) (Brittaney laughs) Oh my gosh, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time, be it till you see it.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!'Be It Till You See It' is a production up 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 39:02  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 39:13  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell 39:18  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 39:27  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 39:39  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you ever heard of an Expectation Hangover? This is not something a greasy cheeseburger or blue gatorade can necessarily cure but the good news is, they tell us something about ourselves that's super important and the sooner we recognize it, the better! 

What has your body been trying to tell you? Wisdom from Bree Gordon inspires LL and Brad to discuss trauma informed care, what your body holds onto, and how to deal with disappointment. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. In this episode you will learn about:Recognizing and dealing with discouragement The expectation hangoverBecoming trauma informed How movement releases trauma What's staying with you? Filling your cup first, so you can show up for othersEpisode References/Links:Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress CycleExpectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change Your Present and Get What You Really Want  OPC Flashcards:OPC Flashcards are on AmazonOPC Flashcards are on our site  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.  ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Social MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:01  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Hello, welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap, where my co host in life, Brad and I are going into dig to the beautiful convo I have ... (Brad: beautiful) I have with Bree Gordon in our last episode. It was really pretty. She's amazing. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. (Brad: Do it.) Alright, um, I'm so grateful for like random connections, Bree is someone I, we are in a group together and I don't participate in the group very much. (Brad laughs) And that's not because a group isn't amazing, it's just, there's only so much time in the day and I give myself full permission to not engage. And but I did reach out and say, "Hey, I would love to share my podcast." And she's like, "Oh, I have a podcast." And I never would have met her and she is just kicking butt. Just being herself, being it till she sees it. And she had like a pandemic baby and all these things. Anyways, I (Brad: Yeah) like, what the reason I'm sharing this is y'all, you never know who you're going to meet when you just say ... raise your hand, "Hi, I could use some help here." And she and I had the most amazing conversation probably when the best conversations I've ever had on a podcast ever, on her podcast... (Brad: Her pod. Sure.) Yeah, The Mindful Mentor. (Brad: Yeah) Please listen to it. It is not, you also have to listen to mine. I mean, it's amazing that you can listen to other people's. But I'm just so grateful that I get to know this person and who she is. So, I can't wait to dag, dig in.Brad Crowell 2:15  Well, I was, I was shocked when she said she was in her early 30s. Because the amount of well like wisdom that she was speaking didn't, I felt like she was, you know, far, far (Brad laughs) older (Lesley: This is not ...) and has a lot more life experience in that.Lesley Logan 2:34  This is not her first time here. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 2:36  Well, I, also, we found out at the end that she was a radio host and I was like, "Oh, I get it now." (Lesley: Yeah, yeah) Cuz like she's just so polished on on the mic. And it was like and, and also she knows what she's talking about. So combine those together. I was like, (Lesley: I know) "Tell me more."Lesley Logan 2:51  I know she I don't think she said like one time, "I need to take a journalist class." Where they like (Brad and Lesley: um, um, like, like um) Okay, anyways, (Brad laughs) here's the deal, y'all, Brad and I are super stoked, because in three days, we are doing our first and very necessary, very planned out, very much like this is the time, Full Body in 15. And when I say "we" I mean, actually, we, Brad is totally going to do this class because I created... Look, here's the deal even listen to the ads and you're gonna hear more. I need you at this event. If you have ever thought about doing Pilates, if you've ever thought you're not good enough for Pilates, if you've ever thought. "I just don't understand it," if you are like trying to get it, if you are just even curious on how to spell it. I want you at this program. It starts on the 20th. We are going to kick off, there are replays. Zero excuses, I don't want to hear them. I'm going to teach you a 15 minute workout. That's your full body, you're going to strengthen and get stretch between aka mobility, aka injury prevention. (Brad: Yeah, and feeling better.) And feeling better. I'm also going to teach you how to teach yourself the exercises. I know, I know I'm giving it away. Because the reality is, is I want you to have this particular cross training in your life. It is going to make everything you already do better. (Brad: Yeah) Which means "doing life better," which is what we're all about. It is a week long program because we're gonna meet up together three times live. And yes, there are replays and by the end of the week, you will have a 15 minute workout that you can confidently do (Brad: Yeah) on your own wherever you are. Before and after your favorite workout or on the days when all you have is 15 minutes. So I'm excited ...Brad Crowell 4:31  For me this is really cool because I'm like, I'm the guy who asks a hundred questions before actually doing a move. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) Like with in yoga, befo... the reason that I was willing to get like dive headfirst into yoga is because I didn't dive headfirst into yoga. (Brad laughs) I took a class with a 75 year old like "Yogi lady" who was not doing any of the fancy stuff and all I did the whole time was ask her a hundred questions about, "How do you do triangle? And what are muscles should I be using and all that kind of stuff." If you are that kind of a person like me, then this Full Body in 15 is going to be perfect for you. Because we're going to break down the exercises, so that you can understand why you're doing what when, where all the things, how they connect together, what muscles you're supposed to be doing, so that you're not actually just straight up hurting yourself. Like right now, I'm actually taking an intro to barbell class here in Vegas, you know, at a local studio. And it's important because especially with weights, like, you could really hurt yourself. And so it's 100% necessary to take a class like that. But I feel like we skip that stage when we're jumping into (Lesley: Yeah) other modalities. And you know, you can totally hurt yourself doing anything. So this is a great place to get started.Lesley Logan 5:46  Well, and also we tend to think that intro or beginner means easy. (Brad: Oh, yeah, not so much.) It's, here's the thing, if you're doing it, right, Pilates is always going to be a little challenging, and also going to meet you where you are. And so yes, this is a class for a newbie. But it doesn't mean it's easy. It's actually going to literally change the form of your running. It's going to make your weight training better. (Brad: Yeah) For all of you who are doing deadlifts and not reaching through your heels because what and you have to like buy special shoes or do a certain thing. I don't even have to think about it. I don't even. I take intro every other week. (Lesley laughs) I like to, I like to moonlight in my intro classes and I, but I promise you like the reason I can, on, without having deadlifted in... Since before the pandemic, I deadlift of more than my body weight because Pilates helps me work from my core out first. And so I want you at this. So go to onlinepilatesclasses.com/fullbodyin15. That is Full Body i n 1 5. Okay, what is our audience question, my love?Brad Crowell 6:57  Okay, we got a great question from a very, very, very sweet woman. And she asked, "What do you do when you're discouraged?"Lesley Logan 7:09  Yeah, and I just... how brave to ask that question because you wouldn't ask that question unless you were feeling that way. (Brad: Right) And I just think like the vulnerability that requires that question is to be honored. And I wish we all lived our lives that way. And so first of all, I'm just so grateful for this question. And second of all, first of all, I don't know, second of all, first, like, can you just pat yourself on the back for I understand that you are in that spot? (Brad: Yeah) So few people actually are aware of how they're feeling. (Brad: Yeah) Like at all and, and also like, they try to excuse the thing away, and so instead of feeling discouraged, you're like, "Well, I'm just tired. Well, I'm just overworked."Brad Crowell 7:50  Well, I think they're feeling it, but they're not like, they're not like taking a step back and being like, "Oh, I'm angry now. Why am I angry?" (Lesley: Yeah) They're just like, "angry." (Lesley: Yeah) The technical term.Lesley Logan 8:01  Yeah. And I I feel like, I feel like what how you handle discouragement? Is that a word? Okay, great. (Brad: Hit the word.) (Brad and Lesley laughs) I think that, A it takes time, and like, screwing up how you feel when you're discouraged, like, I'm sure when you're younger, and you're discouraged, you like throw things at a wall, you know, you get upset. And as you get older, you understand that you can't just like scream in the in the ethers. But if you can do it, I think you'll feel better. (Lesley laughs) I think it's like, important to let the feelings out. And then the other thing is like, I think you have to take a step back, like a 30,000 foot view. (Brad: hmm) Why are you doing what you're doing? Because if you can go back to the "why" then the discouragement is more of an obstacle than it is like a 50 pound weight, like pushing you down a hill. (Brad: Right) You know what I mean? Like, I think if you, if you can go back to why.Brad Crowell 9:01  That's, that's really interesting to think about it as like, the discouragement could be something that you can navigate around instead of something you have to carry with you.Lesley Logan 9:10  Yeah. Wow, thanks for saying that. I don't, I didn't even know that's what I was saying. Um, I'm having an outer body experience everyone. No, but I think like, if you can go back to your why you can actually see the discouragement and you'll actually either navigate around it, instead of carrying it or you'll actually be able to see like, are you even discouraged about the right thing? Like what you're discouraged about does have anything to do with your purpose on this planet? With why you do, what you do? (Brad: sure) Or is it just the fixation on something you can control or you thought you could and you can't and so you're like, "I'm discouraged."Brad Crowell 9:46  Right. The problem may be like one level above what has, you know, caused the immediate discouragement? (Lesley: Yeah) And so it's almost like you're getting discouraged over the symptom rather than the root.Lesley Logan 10:00  Brilliant. Wow, we are just making magic together.Brad Crowell 10:03  On fire.Lesley Logan 10:04   So, so I, I think, what do I do when I'm discouraged? I really do have to take a step back. So 30,000 foot view, look at it. Is the thing I'm discouraged about having anything to do with my why? If so, what can I do? When we're discouraged, we're focused on what's not working.Brad Crowell 10:28  Sure.Lesley Logan 10:30  And the the reality is, is there's always gonna be things that are not working. So what is possible in that moment, and then the next thing is make a decision, just make a decision. Make a decision, make a decision to not do it, to take a step, to put pause on, you can also make a decision to think about it in three weeks. (Brad: hmm) Right? You can also like, put it go, "You know what, this problem I'm having? I'm just trying to think about it until on this date at this time." (Brad: Yeah) And if you can make a decision, that's action, it brings clarity. It's the antidote to fear. Boom! Second, it really is going to free up some emotions and I think we get attached to an outcome. And that's why we're discouraged because we're not getting the outcome we wanted. And if and so just like taking that step back really does make sure that you're actually working on the outcome you want in the first place.Brad Crowell 11:23  Yeah, I mean, also to can allow you to evaluate your expectations.Lesley Logan 11:28  Yes. Which oh my gosh, girl, like as a recovering perfectionist and overachiever. Like I struggle with expectation hangover, big time. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 11:40  Expectation hangover.Lesley Logan 11:42  I didn't make that up. That is actually we should have her on the pod. Oh, my God, we should have her on the pod. (Brad: Let's do that.) Her name is it'll come to me, Christine Hassler. Boom! (Brad: I'm impressed.) She's got a book. It's called Expectation Hangover.Brad Crowell 11:55  I'm very impressed. (Lesley: Thank you so much.) Well, we'll look like like, you know, I hope that that was helpful. I feel like we like from from a from an actual practical perspective. What do you do when you're discouraged? Journal, speak with ... with someone about it, that could be a therapist or your bestie. You know, but you know, the important thing is to, to get it out and talk about it, so that you're not dwelling on it and dwelling on it and dwelling on it. (Lesley: Yeah) If you are discouraged, and you're having trouble going to sleep, I love to have a notepad on the side of my bed. And I just write it down, because it gives my mind permission not to keep circling it over and over and over again, because I won't have to like, "Forget it." I know in this case, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, it's not quite that something you're, you know forgetting. But it just helps you set it aside for the moment.Lesley Logan 12:45  I have one more thing. Ask yourself. Like, "Okay, what if I just stopped doing the thing?" (Brad: Oh, yeah.) "What if I just stopped doing the thing? That's not working, that I'm discouraged about?"Brad Crowell 13:02  Be aware if you ask that of somebody in your life, because they may get angry. (Lesley laughs) ... discouraged. (Brad laughs)Lesley Logan 13:08  Now, if you do get angry. That means that you want to fight for it. (Brad: Yeah) And if you feel relief, that's a sign. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 13:19  Then you can, then maybe, maybe this is something you need to let go.Lesley Logan 13:22  Let go. And it's okay to let go of our things. Did you know that crossing out a goal is the same as checking it off? It's same. (Brad: Right) It's the same, deleting a goal is the same as checking it off. And so I just encourage you, it's okay to, I don't know if it was raised like we don't quit, but you can... quitting is not a weakness. If you like are taking that 30,000 foot view and your body is telling you like, "I don't want to fight for this anymore." (Brad: Yeah) It's not it's it's like actually allowing you to create space for something else. So how is that quitting? Anyways, that's a great question. (Brad: Wow) I freaking loved it. Wow, what a beautiful. (Brad: Yeah) Thanks, Brad for having that conversation (Brad: Yeah) with me. (Brad: That was a journey.) I feel like we have to take a deep breath. (Brad: Yeah) (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 14:07  I mean, we can do that. Breathe inLesley Logan 14:12  Through the nose. Out through the nose. I feel better.Brad Crowell 14:18  Okay. All right. Let's talk about Bree Gordon. Okay, using music to connect, which I got really excited about. Bree Gordon is a board certified Music Therapist, mother, podcaster, public speaker and innovator of new wellness programs. And she is a beautiful believer that music is the universal love language has created a career in helping others process and heal from trauma.Lesley Logan 14:44  Okay, so I knew you would get so stoked when you heard that. I was like, "Oh, my God, Brad's gonna freak the fuck out." (Brad laughs) But also do you know I just came to my mind? (Brad: Tell me.) I think it's easy to like go nod and go, "Yeah, music is a universal love language." But there is this Daily episode, we're not going to link it, you're not to find it yourself. It's a Sunday read. This journalist was trying to search for his father. He finally found him. His father was like, technically a pirate. Anyways, (Brad: Oh, yeah) he, he was playing some jazz music, I want to say it was jazz music. And like, was like, you know, his dad was like, like humming along, knew the beat, knew all the things, it might have been some sort of classical music. But anyways, it was music that like people recognize from the old times. And then he put in a CD (spoiler alert, he found his father.) He put in a CD and the da... his dad was like listening to it and like moving to it. And he was like, "Who is this? I've never heard this before." And he's like, "This is mine." And it was the same type of music that his dad loved. And they never knew each other. And they love the same music. Universal love language. Okay. (Brad: Pretty crazy) So I'm so grateful for her. And one thing I love that she said, is something that I've been really focusing my training education around is being trauma informed. She said, "You're not waiting for them to tell you they have trauma, you're acting as if they do." And so this is if anybody, if you did listen to the episode, we talked about this, and and the link is, in the show notes from the episode on Monday. It's not about asking what's wrong with you? It's about asking what happened to you? (Brad: Yeah) And when you are trauma informed as a person. In this... you can be trauma informed in any business, it doesn't matter what your business is, you're basically coming in to an environment with the assumption that people have had a traumatic experience and not wait for them (Brad: Yeah) to tell you.Brad Crowell 16:32  I mean, especially if you like, for example, something very relatable, if you even work in fitness, and you have taken a client through a workout and they cry afterwards. Right? Like something connected for them. And it could be I mean, it could be something they're experiencing now, or something that they experienced a long time ago. But like working it out, physically working it out, actually, like touched a nerve or touched a memory that triggered something there. Right? So anyway, being trauma informed would mean that, you know, you're going into teaching that person understanding that it's possible that they could have a reaction to it.Lesley Logan 17:12  Yeah. You're not you just, you don't even have to ask because a lot of people are unaware of especially childhood traumas, things like that they buried them so long. So you're basically just assuming that there is trauma there and giving people full permission in that way. And for my Pilates instructors who are listening to this, "Hello, I love you." You know, this is something like we put people on their backs, we put them in some interesting positions. And the weight movement specifically is how trauma is released in the body. And so if you can take some time to understand what being trauma informed is, and like ask yourself different things. And it's really interesting, I was talking with our, with my therapist about this, like, I don't like mirrors in my studio. I actually was never in a studio that had a lot of mirrors when I did Pilates. When I was training it didn't have mirrors, the only studio I had that had mirrors was Equinox. And those mirrors were so funny because you, you would look funny when you looked at them. And I was like, "I hate mirrors." But I specifically didn't have them. And that allowed a lot of women who had body image issues to feel comfortable and safe in my space. I didn't know I was doing it. So the point is, is like it's uh, I really love that you talked about being trauma informed. And it doesn't matter what, who you are listening to this and what you do, you can take some trauma informed classes. And if you're like, I don't even know what that means. Read the book, "What Happened to You?" You will instantly be educated in a way that will allow you like, even over Christmas as I was reading that book. I heard someone in our family say, "What's wrong with you?" to one of our dogs. And I was like, "It's what happened to him." (Brad and Lesley laughs) So anyways, okay, what did you love that she said?Brad Crowell 18:47  Yeah. Um, so, um... the, sorry, I was just thinking about everything that you were just saying there. (Lesley: Oh, it's okay.) Yeah. (Lesley: We can keep talking about it.) Well, I, I like the idea for me, it kind of connects with the idea of being prepared. (Lesley: mm-hmm) Right? Because we are, we are in a position of authority, you know, when we're, you know, if you're working with a client, so going back to that example, you know. And it's, it's actually, like really important to be prepared, if someone you know, is because I think you said something you kind of glossed over it, but you said, "Movement is how trauma is released from the body." (Lesley: Yeah) And I think that it's really important to understand that especially people who work in fitness. If movement is how trauma is released from the body. I mean, just think about that for just a second.Lesley Logan 19:40  Well, not even just who work in fitness, if you are in fitness, like if you take a fitness class. So if you are a listener who just likes to work out or is thinking about working out or if you're a listener who teaches people how to move. Both parties need to be informed because you might not know you might not be aware of the trauma that has happened to you. (Brad: Sure) You might be in a class and you might cry. I remember thinking something is wrong with me when I cried during elephant. And I don't even know what it was that it was bringing up...Brad Crowell 20:09  For Tracy out there elephant is it move and Pilates. (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 20:13  So, I was doing this exercise and I cried. And I had something of, a voice came out of me that said to my teacher, "Today is actually not the day to teach me this exercise." (Brad: Hmm) And I and I, when I said it, I didn't even know whose voice that was. But not every person who has had trauma will have that voice come up for them. And so basically, like, movement is how trauma leaves. So there's a book by Two Sisters, I want to say it's called Burnout. I want to say it Brené Brown interviewed them. It's a great interview. Anyways, they say, like, ladies, especially since that's what most of you are. And to my men, then tell your girlfriends about this, the ladies in your life. If, like, if you had, if you've been ca... called on the street, and you bury that inside you...Brad Crowell 21:07  Emily and Amelia Nagoski. (Lesley: Yes) The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle.Lesley Logan 21:12  Yes. So they even say, obviously in that moment, you can't scream and yell at the dude who just drove pass with this cat call of something that then when you ignored it, they say something else, which is also more invigorating and traumatizing. It's traumatizing. The idea is though, that you cannot hold that within you because that's going to build, it's going to stay in your body. (Brad: hmm) And it's going to cause illness injury. We'll get into that later on this episode. But like, basically, they say, "If you can't in the moment, let the trauma out, let the let the feelings out of your body." Then as soon as you can, you need to let it out, punching a pillow, screaming, you know, things like that. You have to let it out. And so there are things that you didn't... Now that you've heard this, maybe you'll do that for in the future, but there's stuff in the past, and it's going to come out and it usually comes out through movement. So anyways, (Brad: Wow. Okay) Okay.Brad Crowell 22:03  Well, that is that is like super deep. Okay, one thing that I loved that she said, which is actually it's kind of perfect. I had I had chosen that your body will tell you, "What's going on?" (Lesley: Yeah) So I mean, it's we kind of covered it, you know, but But it's in addition to the emotional side of things where it's pulling out, you know, the trauma you may have experienced you, your body... So trauma is the event. The, like trauma actually is the event. Right? But then that is stored in your body. (Lesley: Yeah, if you don't let it out.) If you don't let it out. It's stored in your body. Right? And a perfect example of this is when Bree was talking about her experience from leading three summers of a trauma likes, like week, like a like, like a boot camp kind of a thing. (Lesley: Yeah) And she said the third time through she she literally came out of it. She needed a cane to walk. (Lesley: Yeah) And she realized that she wasn't she was absorbing, you know, their like, you know, she was taking on their stress, their trauma, (Lesley: mm-hmm) you know, into her and wasn't releasing it. And it was like affecting her. She had herniated discs. (Lesley: Yeah) How crazy is that?Lesley Logan 22:11  It's, I mean, like, it's, it's crazy. It's also not surprising. So your body will tell you what's going on. I'm grateful that you brought this up. So y'all I'm gonna, I'm finished in a breathwork training because I can't wait to add this to my retreats and also the coaching that we do. But, for example, if you've got stuff going with your lower back, that's a common place to store anger. If you've got stuff going on with your stomach and intestines, that's a place where you store fear. Heart and chest is heartbreak and sorrow, neck and shoulders is resentment or holding on to burdens. Voice and throat problems is oppression. And so those are just simple, right? But if you actually want to study this, there's like, there are people who are body workers who can tell you like your hip thing is like your mother's money problems like there's, it gets deep and I know that can sound like a double "whoo." It is a one whoo thing like there's a reason why the book - The Body Keeps the Score is exactly point, on point. And we need to start listening to our bodies and not our brains all the time. Because like you have a brain but you have that logical part. And then you have this like, there's an old brain is a subconscious brain. And so I think it's really important, (Brad: hmm) like if we actually start listening to our bodies, and instead of you mentioned earlier symptoms, instead of going to a doctor with symptoms (Brad: hmm) and getting medication to get rid of the symptoms, really trying to understand what is the problem here. (Brad: Yeah) What is the problem here? (Brad: Gotta get to the root.) Yeah. And so for Bree, she wasn't actually taking care of herself. In those moments she was taking on everything, she's taking, "I'll take on your panels," and for our caregivers listening, our mamas and like the people who have like aging parents, if you are taking care of them and not you, your body's going to tell you. (Brad: fascia workers) Mm hmm. (Brad: Yeah) But you know what I will say, a lot of body workers that I know, depend on if they were trained well, like my fascia and my rafters, a Reiki, they learn social workers learn this, to take care of themselves, to have (Brad: Yeah) boundaries. (Brad: boundaries) And a lot of people outside of those specialties, there's no training whatsoever on boundaries and taking care of yourself. (Brad: Yeah) Okay.Brad Crowell 25:49  Well, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items, can we take away from your convo with Bree Gordon? Well, I, she, she actually had a couple, but at the end, she said, "I'm only going to share one." But we, we're going through, there was a couple of recurring themes. But this one that she shared, which I'll talk about, is figure out what life looks like on the other side of trauma. And basically, it is it does take a moment of identifying that you're experiencing pain. You're experiencing this, you know, whatever it might show up as grief, you know. And you kind of do have to have this, this awareness that you're in it, but you don't have to stay in it. You will stay in it if you if you just keep dwelling on it. And she's saying, "To move on, you need to imagine what life will be like, when it's not, when you're not in it anymore in the same way." Right? And so, you know, she, she, she compared it to a mountain, and we're treating it like a mountain. And we're and we just imagine that we're never going to get to the other side of that mountain. But what does life look like on the other side, and when you can, when you could take a minute and envision that. And maybe you literally write it down like this could be where a dream board comes into play. (Lesley: mm-hmm) You know, where you actually have it on your mirror or on the wall, or on a thing in your wallet or it's on your dash in your car like something somewhere where you're going to see it on a consistent basis. That you know, like life isn't like this forever. And yes, it's painful. And it's never gonna like go away forever, but it will change and it won't be the same as it is today.Lesley Logan 27:51  Oh my gosh, you just made me think of Amy Cuddy because she had a traumatic experience. Amy Cuddy is the inspiration for the title of this podcast, by the way. (Brad: Oh, right.) And my assistant did DM her. I don't even know who told her that I approved that. (Brad laughs) Because like nothing could bring me more fear than (Lesley laughs) than if I'm asking her to be on this podcast. And if she might say "no," and we'll learn how to say no. And we'll just take and they go, "That's a great way to say no, we'll take that for ourselves." But anyways, she had a traumatic brain injury. And she had a mentor in college and a grad grad school say to her like this is you're gonna ask a question every single day in every single class so that you can feel like you belong here. And that's how and she didn't even realize that she was actually being the life, what life looked like on the other side of that trauma (Brad: Yeah) and how someone came up to her when she was at a working at a school and someone came up and said, "I don't belong here." And she's like, "Oh, you're gonna ask a question everyday." (Lesley laughs) So um, that's I think that's amazing and that's you know, we should even what even if you don't think that you're someone who's suffering from trauma in this moment, figure out what life looks like another set of whatever discouragement or problem you've got going on and (Brad: Yeah) will be really helpful.Brad Crowell 29:10  Yeah, well, what about you?Lesley Logan 29:12  My biggest takeaway - show up for others but do it with accountability for yourself. Hello, fill your cup first. She she was there as a giver and I think so many of us are, we're just give, we like are such givers. But you if you do not ...Brad Crowell 29:28  When we say she was there, are you talking about leading the trauma camp?Lesley Logan 29:31  Yeah, she's leading a trauma camp. She was doing these other things. And like she was just doing all these things to like, take care of so many people, (Brad: Yeah) to take care of their problems. But she was ignoring herself. (Brad: Yeah) And you all the plane literally says, "air mask on first, parents." Right? And that's for all of us, "air mask on first." I can't put Brad's air mask on for him if I have put my own on. So I know that it's hard. I know that the people that you are taking care of you are just like, you just want to be there for them. But if you are not being accountable to yourself first, you are not actually giving them everything that you could. Just not...Brad Crowell 30:11  Yeah, I mean, we talk about this all the time with with OPC, with onlinepilatesclasses.com, where, you know, the reason that you can do life better, is because you've prioritized yourself. You you aren't putting yourself on the back burner, right? Because when you especially with working out we are we know all the science behind why, you know, working out and you know, Pilates is amazing for your brain and your body. You know, and it's obviously logical too, like when you feel better about life, you're going to go do life better. (Lesley: Yeah) You know, so but what happens so often is, we don't prioritize ourselves. We don't make sure that you know, we have protected time to you know, get a workout in or read a book or whatever that might be that is, is you know, what, you're what you need. And and then, you know, at the end of the day, we're resentful, we're frustrated, we're tired, we're angry, we're, you know, and it just builds, it builds over time. And you know, after a while it becomes (Lesley: Yeah) it's like a path to burnout, straight up.Lesley Logan 31:17  Yeah, it is and so, or discouragement because, (Brad: or discouragement) you're putting so much in and not getting what you want out. And that's because you are not taking care of yourself. So I (Brad: Yeah) just I love this conversation. (Brad: Yeah) What a beautiful interview. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Yeah. This is a great one) Patting myself on the back. But ... (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 31:38  You mean, you and me, I was also referencing the one when you have with Bree. That was also a great one. So, yeah. (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 31:45  Um, you and I, but also yes, but Bree. No, especially with Bree, I just meant myself. I was just being (Brad laughs) that humble person I am. (Brad: My wife.) (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Amazing) Someday will have a show. It's called My Wife and it's basically ...Brad Crowell 32:01  It's gonna be me shaking my head. Yeah. (Brad laughs)Lesley Logan 32:03  About how humble I am. Y'all, thank you so much for being here. I'm so grateful for you. We are so grateful for you. You really matter to us more than we could ever actually tell you. But we could tell you if you screenshot this episode and share it with your takeaways. I will actually tell you in your DMs how grateful I am for you specifically. But please, you know, we can't change the world without sharing these messages with people. If you are nodding your head along with this and you're loving it, then please send it to the person that you know needs to hear it. If you want to text it to them, or if you want to share it on the Gram. That'd be great. And let us know how you're using these in your life. And we'll catch you in the next episode.Brad Crowell 32:43  Thanks so much.Lesley Logan 32:46  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 33:19  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 33:30  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell 33:34  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 33:43  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 33:55  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes, so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

No matter how big your life is, you're bound to face disappointment with some level of regularity. Disappointment comes when our expectations don't match the reality of the situation. In the book https://www.amazon.com/Expectation-Hangover-Overcoming-Disappointment-Work/dp/1480526754 (“Expectation Hangover”) by Christine Hassler, she breaks it down into three categories: Situational, interpersonal, and self-imposed.  Left unchecked, disappointment can lead to a lack of motivation, depression, hopelessness, and even sickness. Luckily, it can be managed. Today, we talk about what to do in different situations to get through lingering clouds of disappointment and move on: anticipate it, feel it, control our response, and more. Tune in for the full download. Resources: Read: https://www.amazon.com/Expectation-Hangover-Overcoming-Disappointment-Work/dp/1480526754 (Expectation Hangover) by Christine Hassler Connect on Instagram: Seychelle Van Poole: https://www.instagram.com/seychellevp (@seychellevp) Vija Williams: https://www.instagram.com/viavija (@viavija) Sarah Reynolds: https://www.instagram.com/sarahreynoldsoji (@sarahreynoldsoji) Wendy Papasan: https://www.instagram.com/wendypapasan (@wendypapasan) Empire Building is a production of http://crate.media (Crate Media)

Christine Hassler is one of the best life coaches in the entire world. She is so good that Jill is sure this episode will be an all-time favorite. Christine super tapped in and went through so much work in, through, and on herself that she is what Jill calls a “clean vessel”. With tremendous amounts of grace, Christine holds space for others in such a beautiful way. During this episode, Christine shares her insights on mom guilt, perfectionism, marriage, control and more. As Jill's coach, she continually contributes to the transformational journey of Jill and others as she helps everyone live their best life. Christine had a profound impact on Jill's life, and Jill is excited to share the conversation in this episode of Be You.   ------------------ The Be You podcast is hosted by certified girl boss Jill Herman, a champion of women's empowerment, personal development, women helping women, and being yourself without apology. Each episode features Jill's experiences with personal development and her journey to being yourself, sometimes featuring guests who are prime examples of women helping women.    Being a girl boss no longer just refers to achievement in the workplace. Personal development and prioritizing being yourself are key ingredients in the women's empowerment movement. Jill has built a community of women helping women so that each one can reach their full potential as the badass girl boss they are.    Whether you're already a champion of women's empowerment, you're a girl boss interested in personal development, you'd like advice on being yourself, you're looking for a community of women helping women, or you're just here for Jill's lessons and entertainment, the Be You podcast is for you.  ------------------   Christine Hassler is a best-selling author, keynote speaker, master coach, and podcast host who is committed to guiding people and organizations to their highest potential. She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about . . . but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. Today, she supports individuals in answering the questions: “Who am I, what do I want, and how do I get it?” Her superpowers of intuition and compassion help people break through challenges that at one time seemed insurmountable. Bottom line: she helps people get “over it and on with it!” with love. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about generation diversity, millennials, resilience, leadership, life balance and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked. Find Christine: Christinehassler.com Instagram  |  Facebook Over It and On With It Podcast ------------------   Lisa Bilyeu on women's empowerment:  “Cheer for your girls like you got pom-poms at a pep rally.” - Lisa Bilyeu    Lisa Bilyeu on women helping women:  “Choose your life's board members like you're building a Fortune 500 company.” - Lisa Bilyeu    Lisa Bilyeu on being a girl boss:  “Be brave. Fearless.  Be badass at 15 years old. Be badass at 80 years old.” - Lisa Bilyeu   Lisa Bilyeu on personal development:  “If you're still looking for that one person who will change your life, take a look in the mirror.” - Lisa Bileyu   Glennon Doyle on women's empowerment:  “People who need help sometimes look a lot like people who don't need help.” - Glennon Doyle   Glennon Doyle on being yourself:  “Every girl must decide whether to be true to herself or true to the world.” - Glennon Doyle   Glennon Doyle on personal development:  “What if pain - like love - is just a place brave people visit?” - Glennon Doyle   Glennon Doyle on being yourself:  “I have met myself and I am going to care for her fiercely.” - Glennon Doyle   Mel Robbins on personal development:  “You need to hear this loud and clear: No one is coming. It is up to you.” - Mel Robbins   Mel Robbins on being yourself:  “There will always be someone who can't see your worth. Don't let it be you.” - Mel Robbins   Mel Robbins on being a girl boss:  “You have been assigned this mountain so that you can show others it can be moved.” - Mel Robbins   Rupi Kaur on being yourself:  “Loneliness is a sign you are in desperate need of yourself.” - Rupi Kaur   Rupi Kaur on being a girl boss:  “How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you” - Rupi Kaur   Rupi Kaur on women's empowerment: “If you were born with the weakness to fall you were born with the strength to rise” - Rupi Kaur

In this episode, my guest Christine Hassler and I are discussing so many important topics. Talking points: Please tell us more about Expectation Hangover? How can we avoid feeling regret over lost chances? How can a person feeling broken and helpless improve their circumstances? If we are under pressure, is it a sign that we are undergoing spiritual awakening; what's spiritual awakening actually feels like? People think that surrendering to our circumstances is an act of accepting defeat; what do you have to say about it? Our society isn't perfect; many wrongs are happening all the time. How do we decide when to speak up and when to let go?   High-performance coaches vilify taking a break or resting for a bit. What's your opinion on this? How can we stop emotional suppression? How can we stop others from damaging our self-worth? How can we break the barriers that we've built around our hearts because of bad experiences? Guest Christine Hassler @christinehassler is a best-selling author, keynote speaker, master coach, and podcast host who is committed to guiding people and organizations into their highest potential. She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about . . . but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. Today Christine leads seminars and workshops to audiences around the country. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about generation diversity, millennials, resilience, leadership, life balance and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked. Host Olyasha Novozhylova - NotBasicBlonde @notbasicblonde_ NotBasicBlonde Podcast - @nbbpodcast Olyasha Novozhylova is the founder and creator of Not Basic Blonde, a fashion, and lifestyle blog dedicated to inspiring young women to create an extraordinary style. Graduated from Georgia State University with a BBA in Managerial Sciences, Olyasha successfully built a career in IT/Project Management, before she became a full time blogger. A model, blogger, entrepreneur, author, and celebrity podcast host of NotBasicBlonde Podcast.  As the founder and host of NotBasicBlonde Podcast, where no topic is off limits, Olyasha provides millennials an ultimate guide on entrepreneurship, dating, marketing, self-development, astrology, spirituality, fashion, coaching, beauty, health & wellness. Author of the children's book  Cutie the Unicorn – It's ok to be different, Olyasha teaches our younger generation how to express their individuality. The Russian model led an impressive 15-year career in fashion and runway in Atlanta and overseas, as well as enjoying several acting roles. Now a leading influencer, Olyasha shares her beauty, wellness, and fashion tips with an audience of over half a million.  As seen in YahooFinance, Jezebel magazine, Thrive, Medium, and Fashion Week Online magazines. Olyasha has also partnered with brands such as Cartier, Revolve, PrettyLittleThing, PGA, Steve Madden, Too Faced, Vital Proteins, Tarte, DryBar, Drunk Elephant, etc.  When she's not documenting her travels through the world, Olyasha is busy masterfully educating women how to create iconic looks with a mix of affordable and designer pieces, as well as offering makeup, skincare, and fitness tips to encourage her followers to live their best and most beautiful lives!

In this episode, I am speaking about when things don't turn out how we hoped or expected. Sometimes we may make a decision, and the results of that decision do not go as planned. Our faith in God reminds us that everything will work out for our good. Reference article: When Things Don't Turn Out How You'd Hoped, Expected or Planned (psychcentral.com) Nice 2 Meet U on IG: @nice2meetupodcast Nice 2 Meet U on Twitter: @nice2meetupod --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/lynette-farmer-nice2meetu/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/lynette-farmer-nice2meetu/support

Spiritual Life Coach, Christine Hassler, joins us to talk about how we can experience self improvement and personal growth by breaking free from old wounds and past hurts that play into a cycle of unwanted outcomes. Listen as they discuss the ways disappointment or failure can actually be a doorway to help you move forward, find healing, and create space for a life you desire. TOPICS:
 Meet Christine Hassler (01:15) Her experience with depression (07:20) The Expectation Hangover (13:17) Achieving goals without disappointment (21:45) Sitting with your feelings (24:27) Managing your inner critic (36:30) Why people fail with personal growth (42:58) MORE FROM THE HEALTH BABES: 
Did you know? You have a chance to win 1 of 2 prizes, with a giveaway in every episode! Leave a review to win, and don't forget to subscribe for future episodes!   Find more from Christine Hassler on her website ChristineHassler.com Follow Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler   Find more from Dr. Becky Campbell and Dr. Krystal Hohn at DrBeckyCampbell.com Consult with us one on one HERE Follow Dr. Becky and Dr. Krystal on Instagram @drbeckycampbell and @drkrystalhohn, follow the Health Babes Podcast @healthbabespodcast Find us on Facebook, on Pinterest, and on YouTube   Get resources on how best to support your thyroid HERE Wondering if you have histamine intolerance? Take THIS QUIZ and receive a free histamine guide Get answers to your health questions HERE  

Jenn and Tara return from weekends away and realize shifting back to reality is not always fun. Available on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Master coach, facilitator, speaker, and author of Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself From Your Past, Change your Present and Get What you Really Want Christine Hassler is back to talk about how to leverage our expectations, separate those expectations from goals, and see the opportunity for growth by looking at how we respond to disappointment.Guest Links:For more information on Christine's podcast, Over It and On With It, and her book, Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself From Your Past, Change your Present and Get What you Really Want go to: https://christinehassler.comFor 25% off The Fitness App by Jillian Michaels, go to www.thefitenssapp.com/podcastdealFollow us on Instagram @JillianMichaels and @MartiniCindyEmail your questions to JillianPodcast@gmail.comThis Week's Sponsors:THIRDLOVE.com/JILLIAN for 20% off your first orderYou can find new episodes of Keeping It Real: Conversations with Jillian Michaels, completely ad free, on Wondery+ https://wondery.app.link/jillianSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We Talk About: Highlights and lowlights Dealing with high expectations Leaving space in your life for joy Why playing at a high level brings more challenge   Resources: Follow Jessica: @jessicazweig Follow Alli: @alliwebb Follow Lori: @loriharder Follow Brittany: @britdrisc   Show Notes: Jessica Zweig is CEO of the SimplyBe. agency, a premier personal branding firm based in Chicago, and serving clients across the globe. Named a “personal branding expert” by Forbes, a “top digital marketer to watch” by INC, and honored with the gold and silver Stevie® Award for Female Entrepreneur of the Year in 2018 and 2019, Jessica facilitates sold-out workshops and speaks on the power of personal branding to corporations including Google, Salesforce, Virgin, Nike, Motorola, Red Bull, and Bank of America. She also hosts the top-ranked marketing podcast, The SimplyBe. Podcast. Jessica's debut book, Be: A No-Bullsh*t Guide to Increasing Your Self Worth and Net Worth by Simply Being Yourself, launched in February 2021 with Sounds True, an imprint of Macmillan. After growing up in Highland Park, IL and attending The University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, Jessica co-founded CheekyChicago, one of Chicago's premier lifestyle magazines. The website was a huge success and, although Jessica was known as a top ten Chicago “it girl,” behind the scenes, her life was far from perfect. The website began to lose money, and Jessica's relationship with her co-founder turned toxic, but she still strove to maintain the façade of success. After overdrafting her checking account and becoming unable to pay her cell phone bill,  Jessica realized she wasn't being her authentic self. Instead, she was operating from a place of  fear which prevented her from true success. This revelation led Jessica to found her own company, SimplyBe. Agency, in 2014. At SimplyBe., Jessica and her team work with corporate executives, entrepreneurs, and creatives to become recognized industry experts and thought leaders. SimplyBe. works with clients including Heineken, Morningstar, Blackstone, Mars, Vishen Lakhiani, Jason Rosenthal, Andrea Levoff, Larry Jordan, and many more to successfully develop their personal brands while highlighting their greatest business asset: their authenticity. Her business provides customized branding, marketing, and creative services with an emphasis on core values like kindness, truth, service, and, of course, authenticity. Jessica believes authenticity is the key to true success, and that being yourself opens up a new world of empowerment that's not just about how much money you're making. She's also on a mission to debunk the perception that personal branding is an act of vanity; instead, when done right, personal branding is an act of service, social responsibility, and a positive investment toward a positive future. Jessica has brought her life-changing and trademarked methodology to clients around the world, taking many from unknown expert to recognized thought leader. In her free time, she loves traveling, meditating, journaling, working out, and reading. She is involved with multiple charities including The Humane Society, The Human Rights Campaign, I Grow Chicago, Black Lives Matter, and more. Jessica currently lives in Chicago with her husband and two dogs.

On this week's episode, Erica shares a bunch of life updates to start and then around 14 minutes into the episode she goes into the one thing that will make or break your progress (in case you want to skip the life updates!).She also shares some tools for exploring why this thing is getting in the way of your progress, questions you need to ask yourself to get clear before you move forward and a few book suggestions, listed below:Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Joe Dispenza (for general personal growth)Expectation Hangover by Christine Hassler (for general personal growth)The Soulmate Secret by Arielle Ford (for growth and using the law of attraction for romantic relationships)The Illusion of Money by Kyle Cease (for growth and using the law of attraction around money)Links mentioned in the show:Waitlist for Erica's online course to be launched at the beginning of September: https://www.ericaalisonwellness.com/waitlist Join Erica's email list to stay updated on special offers: https://forms.aweber.com/form/20/680630420.htm Follow EricaInstagram @ericaalisonwellnessFacebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/burnoutandbrainfogrecovery Follow Lauren:Instagram @laurengerminarioBusiness @integrativedivorceFollow the podcast Instagram @theresahackforthat

If you're a woman, then my guess is you know a little something about taking care of others and putting everything and everyone else first. And, you may even feel a sense of guilt when it comes to taking care of yourself. Or taking time to do things you love.If so, you are going to love this episode. Aftan called in today because she has been neglecting a very big part of who she is for many years to raise her two daughters. Slowly over time she let go of pieces of herself and her dreams, and has gotten caught up in always giving to others without giving herself the same attention.Now that her daughters are grown and out of the house, she wants to reconnect with her artistic spirit and the dreams that she had left behind; one of them being to FINALLY write a screenplay that she has been thinking about for years.Aftan's obstacle to this goal is that she has pushed herself to the point of burnout by taking care of everyone else in her life, and she needs to relearn how to take care of her own needs and get reconnected to her passions; in essence to reclaim the lost parts of herself.During the episode we  uncover the fact that she feels unsupported by her peers in her small Idaho town. We dive deeper into this lack of support, and learn that it actually stems back much further than she realized…and that she took on the role of caregiver out of lack of feeling worthy in the world. This led to being in many different relationships with people who had what she deems, “broken wings.” It's an a-ha moment for her when we discover how her over-giving is just a way she avoids herself and her own desires. Her taking care of others is her compensatory strategy to feel loved and get attention, but it has left her feeling empty and alone.If you have let a large part of who you are fall by the wayside, and have let some of your dreams go because you feel guilty indulging in your own passions or self interest, today's conversation will be extremely insightful and inspirational.This episode offers powerful strategies and tools to create the support you need so you can take care of yourself and COME HOME to what really matters to you without guilt, or fear of being selfish.Whether you are a people pleaser, over-giver, you lack setting boundaries or fear the judgement of others, I know this episode will help you see life, and yourself through a different perspective. In essence it will help you to reclaim the power, and your dreams that you let go of a long time ago.RESOURCESIf you are suffering from burnout and Human Giver Syndrome, check out this book by Dr. Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski!Find the book Expectation Hangover by Christine Hassler here.Check out Christine's incredible podcast, Over It & On With It at her website.If you want some free coaching, be a guest on my show and let's work it out together and help you Come Home to what truly matters;​ book a session here.Come join my FREE Facebook Group, Reclaim Your Wild: A Radical Self-Care + Self-Discovery Group for WomenFind me on Instagram: @melcostellocoachWebsite: https://karmachow.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/2004687/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/karmachow

This episode is about how to get your needs met in an intimate relationship. Today’s caller, Shaun, is looking for guidance on how to re-open his heart and rekindle the warmth for his partner whom he loves. We discuss strategies for getting beyond the hurts and moving toward understanding and compassion. We often love the way we need to be loved instead of loving a person the way they need to be loved.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode298]   As much as we want love and connection in a relationship, the thing we want even more is not to get hurt or lose our power. Often, we put more energy into avoiding what we don’t want than creating the relationship we do want because that’s what we need to do to survive.   Our intimate relationships are often the very fertile ground where we work out any issues from childhood we haven’t quite resolved. If we were criticized a lot in childhood, it can come up in a relationship. If we were anxious or didn’t feel safe, that is going to come up. If there was cheating within our parent’s relationship, that is going to come up. Jealousy, abandonment, all the things we felt as children tend to come up in romantic relationships because romantic relationships are our adult family.   Remember, our relationship with our primary family is the intimate relationship that forms the foundation for all future intimate relationships.   Whenever we are in an argument, or rut, or tension with our partner, the most important thing that we can do is get to a level of understanding and compassion with ourselves and our partner to understand what the need is that is not being met inside of ourselves. We discover the unmet need that is triggering us and making the situation hard. Then, we look at our needs and then at our partner’s needs and take responsibility for communicating the needs in a clear, specific, non-blaming way.   It is important to be clear with our partners about how we need to be loved.   Join us for our virtual Relationship Retreat on June 11‒13, 2021. It will be recorded if you can’t make it live. But if you make it live you have an opportunity for live coaching. Go to ChristineHassler.com/relationshipretreat. We will discuss aligning values, getting better at fulfilling each other’s needs, and communication tools. Couples and singles are welcome.   I’ve partnered with Hiitide, which is an online book club and micro-course to help you apply principles from my book, Expectation Hangover, to your daily life. Turn the book into action. Get 28-days of easily digestible prompts and exercises delivered to your phone. A live Q&A session with me is included. The project launches July 1, 2021. Go to ChristineHassler.com/bookclub to learn more. Podcast listeners get 25% off by using the code 'Hangover25' at checkout.   Consider/Ask Yourself Do you feel like your heart is not open to your partner? Do you feel like there are things that happen in your relationship you can’t forgive, can’t shift, or can’t get over? Are there issues from your childhood that may be playing out in your relationship? Are you in a dynamic of being avoidant and it produces anxiety in your partner, or vice-a-versa?   Shaun’s Question: Shaun would like guidance on how to re-open his heart to his partner.   Shaun’s Key Insights and Ahas: He has been in his relationship for nearly five years. He doesn’t feel the closeness he once felt. He loves his partner. Both partners get triggered during arguments. He was bullied as a child and felt attacked. His dad wasn’t around as much as he would have liked. His parent’s marriage was passionless. The dynamic in his partner’s family was competitive. He tends to dissociate during arguments.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Ask his partner what she needs. Set his partner up to win. Attend our upcoming relationship retreat. Have a ‘needs’ conversation with his partner. Get specific about how he wants his needs met. Make his relationship his top priority.   Takeaways: When triggered in a relationship, consider what needs are not being met.  Make your current or future relationship a priority. Join us for our relationship retreat June 11-13, 2021.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services. Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

What does it mean to "do the work?" That's exactly what we dive into with Christine Hassler, master coach and best-selling author of 3 books. After struggling with depression and going through a heartbreaking divorce, Christine went deep to reprogram her subconscious and make peace with her inner critic. She has reconstructed what it means to be in her "feminine energy" as a powerful business woman and create conscious partnership with her husband. You'll walk away from this episode with spiritual hygiene tools, empowered to feel your full range of emotions and be the muse to inspire the men in your life.

“The more that you're in your own confidence and you're in your body and the more you don't need someone else to fulfill you but that you are fulfilled by yourself, that is what makes you so attractive.” Uh, hell yeah! That's from guest and sexual empowerment coach A'magine, in her conversation with Christine Hassler on the “Over It And On with It podcast. Listen in to get A'magine's strategies for incorporating pleasure in to everyday life, her somewhat controversial view on life after becoming single and how to get out of our overly active minds and connected back into our bodies.Links and Show Notes:Listen to the full episode of today's clip, CC: Become the Sexually Confident Person You Were Meant to be with A'magine.Follow Christine on Instagram and YouTube.Get Christine's book, "Expectation Hangover".Check out Christine's website.Follow A'magine (Amy Jo Goddard) on Instagram and Facebook.Check out A'magine's blog, Amy Jo Goddard.If you enjoy the podcast, please subscribe and share. As always, thanks for listening.

Sometimes, a lot of the pain that come our way happen when we allow ourselves to see life a certain way. Today, Stefanie Peters is challenging you to see life differently - things didn't happen to you, they happened for you. 2020 can either happen to us or we can happen to 2020! Now is your time to fire your fear, build your faith, and become the boss of your own life. Don't miss this episode so discover how you can outwit expectation hangover and crush your 2020 goals.

Catherine is here today with Christine Hassler. Christine is the best-selling author of three books, most recently Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change your Present and Get What you Really Want. She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, as a keynote speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Christine loves living a healthy lifestyle and is obsessed with human optimization. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about generation diversity, millennials, resilience, leadership, life balance and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked. She is also a frequent contributor to The Huffington Post and Cosmo. Find Out More About Christine Hassler Visit her Website Follow Christine Hassler on Facebook Connect with Christine on Twitter @ChristinHassler Follow Christine Hassler on Instagram @christinehassler It's now time to tune into this one very inspirational human being. ENJOY!!

Does technology help or hurt your relationships? Does your “smart” phone connect you to others, or does it disconnect you from your natural drives and from the people you love? Obviously, there are a myriad of ways that modern day technology helps our lives but there are also many ways that it makes us feel separate and disconnected from what matters most. In this episode we explore all of the ways that technology has affected us and what we can do about it. Our interview with Christine Hassler (our returning champion!) teaches us: 1) The ways that our technology use disconnects us from the people we care about, 2) How technology affects the natural masculine and feminine drives inside of us, and 3) The ways that we can change our relationship to technology to invite more energy and intimacy into our lives. Christine Hassler is the best-selling author of three books, most recently Expectation Hangover. For over a decade, as a keynote speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Visit her online at www.christinehassler.com

Catherine is here today with Christine Hassler. Christine is the best-selling author of three books, most recently Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change your Present and Get What you Really Want. She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, as a keynote speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Christine loves living a healthy lifestyle and is obsessed with human optimization. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about generation diversity, millennials, resilience, leadership, life balance and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked. She is also a frequent contributor to The Huffington Post and Cosmo. Find Out More About Christine Hassler Visit her Website Follow Christine Hassler on Facebook Connect with Christine on Twitter @ChristinHassler Follow Christine Hassler on Instagram @christinehassler Radical Shifts Summit Grab Your FREE Spot Here Be Undeniably Awesome - Australian Tour Get Your Ticket HERE It's now time to tune into this one very inspirational human being. ENJOY!!

What does it mean to be masculine or feminine? In this episode we discuss how the masculine and feminine polarities exist in all of us, and how we can celebrate those differences in all of our relationships. Our interview with Christine Hassler guides us through how to best relate to our partners in the ways that THEY need us to relate to them, and how to truly know each other through intimate conversations. Christine Hassler is the best-selling author of three books, most recently Expectation Hangover. For over a decade, as a keynote speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Visit her online at www.christinehassler.com

Hey guys! This episode was off the charts awesome as I chatted with Christine Hassler. We cover her book Expectation Hangovers, surrendering with release writing, and there's a kick-ass clearing meditation! Oh and we also talked about coming out of self-judgement and deep self-love. Here are just a few show notes: There are three types of Expectation Hangers! 1. Expectation Hangover #1: 
Things don't go as planned! 2. Expectation Hangover #2: 
Not feeling how you think you should now that you reached your goals. 3. Expectation Hangover #3:
You have been thrown a curveball. Go ahead... listen now ^ For Christine's FREE Gift! Text CHRISTINE to 444999 About Christine Christine Hassler is the best-selling author of three books, most recently "Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself From Your Past, Change your Present and Get What you Really Want". She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, as a keynote speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. For Christine's FREE Gift! Text CHRISTINE to 444999

Christine Hassler left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, she has been sharing her passion to ease suffering on the planet as a speaker, retreat facilitator, and life coach. Episode 358: Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change Your Present & Get What You Really Want by Christine Hassler. You can find her book and learn more about her here: http://expectationhangover.com Please Rate & Review the Show! Visit Me Online at OLDPodcast.com and Join the Ol' Family to get your Free Gifts! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

THE MOMENT HQ sits down with Christine Hassler “When we are clinging to expectations we are waiting for something to happen and giving our power away” - Christine Hassler, The Moment HQ podcast Christine Hassler is the best-selling author of Expectation Hangover, The 20 Something Manifesto, and 20 Something, 20 Everything. She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, as a speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Visit her online at www.christinehassler.com Christine is a very dear friend who I've had to pleasure of connecting with for a number of years now and also supported her when she's hosted her events in Australia. Our conversation is a simple one that examines expectations and how they set us up for struggle and lack of inner peace. This perspective may be something you haven't yet realised for yourself and could be your own little AHA! moment to free you from the thing that you've been stuck on. May this serve as a reference point for the ways you can choose to approach expectations, fear and to realise you are not alone as we all go through challenging moments. Christine and I have a chat about EXPECTATION HANGOVERS Learn about: What is an Expectation Hangover? The biggest theme that comes up with Christine's coaching clients? Fear and how to face it The key to overcoming challenges What it means to give our power away And find out: What moves Christine? What she believe is her greatest asset? What she'd be doing if she wasn't in her current career? The best piece of advice she's been given.

Christine Hassler is the best-selling author of “Expectation Hangover,” “The 20 Something Manifesto,” and “20 Something, 20 Everything.” She left her successful job as a Hollywood agent to pursue a life she could be passionate about. For over a decade, as a speaker, retreat facilitator, spiritual psychologist and life coach, and host of the top-rated podcast “Over it and On With It”, she has been teaching and inspiring people around the world. Christine believes once we get out of our own way, we can show up to make the meaningful impact we are here to make. Visit her online at www.christinehassler.com Get the Off the Grid Into the Heart CD by Sister Jenna.  Like America Meditating on FB & follow us on Twitter.  Visit our website at www.meditationmuseum.org.  Download our free Pause for Peace App for Apple or Android.

Don't believe every thing you think! "Some of us get wake up calls in a graceful way and some of us need a massive 2x4 to hit us on the head."-Christine Hassler The Cheat Sheet: What is the original definition of passion? What exactly is an expectation hangover, according to Christine? Our unconscious mind runs 90-95% of our programming: true or false? If we change this one thing then we change our results. What is it? Is everything energy? Christine explains. And so much more... Have you known someone who has built a seemingly successful, ideal life and yet is completely miserable? That was the case for our guest on today's episode. Christine Hassler was earning six-figures as Hollywood's youngest female agent who walked away from it all. Today we talk about why she left, how she got the idea for her book Expectation Hangover and specific strategies we can use to change our beliefs and ultimately, our lives. All of that and much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. Click Here to Support The Show and get 10% off Onnit! More About This Show: Christine's drive for success began, she jokes, in the 4th grade when she was bullied and picked on by classmates. She decided then she was going to be somebody one day and would show them! And she did. She became the youngest female agent in Hollywood, by 25 she was making six figures a year, working in a posh Beverly Hills office, had her own assistant and was dating the head of a movie studio and going to The Oscars, Sundance and other red carpet Hollywood-type events. She was living a glamorous life that should've made her happy. But despite all of it she felt miserable inside. And the more miserable she felt, the more she pushed herself to achieve. She thought what so many of us thought: "When I get X, then I'll be happy." But every time she got X, she was even more unhappy and nothing seemed to change that. So she did the only thing she knew how to do: she quit her job and walked away from her successful career. She floundered for the next year, accumulating debt, becoming estranged from her family, being diagnosed with an immune disorder and being left by her fiancee six months before the wedding. She hit rock bottom. She was on her bathroom floor pondering whether or not her life was worth living, if she should even be on Earth any more. As she searched within herself, something told her her life was valuable and had purpose. She was filled with a sense of peace and happiness. Those feelings were enough for her to make a deal; she wasn't religious but she told whatever Higher Power might be out there that she would dedicate her life to helping others. Christine didn't know what that would look like exactly, but a few days later after the bathroom incident, she got the idea for her first book and that set her on a new, equally successful path. On today's show we discuss several topics including what an expectation hangover is, what coping methods we can use that actually work when we're curing our hangover, and how to use release writing to let go of any emotions that don't serve us. According to Christine an expectation hangover is when we have an idea of how we want life to be and we set our plans, our goals to achieve that idea, but life gives us something else. Then we turn to coping mechanisms to help us cure that expectation hangover, and very often these coping methods aren't healthy. Christine shares some healthier ways to deal like asking: "What am I learning from this?" instead of what we usually say which is "Why me?". We can also remember control is just an illusion, and none of us have it! We have free will, influence and choice but we all receive curveballs from life that are out of our control. We can also create better relationships with ourselves and be clear on our expectations of others. Instead of thinking people in our lives can read our minds we can actually create agreements in which all parties are clear. She also goes into detail on how we can recognize our patterns, giving us practical steps to take and she shares the actionable tool of release writing, which allows us to go deep into an emotion and release it in a healthy, positive way so we can create something new where that emotion or belief had been in our minds. There's even more where that wisdom came from so tune in to hear all of it straight from Christine! Then join me in thanking her for being here and as always, thank you for joining us. We'll see you next time. THANKS CHRISTINE HASSLER! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Christine know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Christine on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Christine Hassler's web site Christine Hassler on TwitterThe Art of Charm bootcamps You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox-Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)!   HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there.   FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Christine Hassler is a Gen Y and millennial expert. She believe millennials have the highest expectations and are often hit hardest when they face reality and realize it's not as easy as it looks. She talks to Jason about how to manage your expectations better, why she loves millennials, and a little bit about her latest book entitled Expectation Hangover.    Key Takeaways:  3:15 – Christine talks a little bit about her book, Expectation Hangover, and who it is meant for.  6:10 – Christine says millennials are hard working employees. They learn quickly and think outside the box.  10:15 – You need to have a break up in order to grow. A break up leads to a break down, which actually then leads to a break through.  13:00 – Take a brief pause in your life to accept the on-rush of feelings you might have, once you've done that, then you can work on releasing them.  16:00 – Christine believes millennials will find a better solution for our current broken school system.  19:10 – Don't base your happiness and self-worth on the result of your goal. If you fail, it will take you longer to bring yourself back up. Have goals, but distance yourself emotionally from them.  20:50 – Christine wants you to optimistic, but she also doesn't want you to let yourself down for putting too much emotion in that optimism.    Mentioned In This Episode: http://jasonhartmanfoundation.org/ http://youngwealth.com/ http://christinehassler.com/book-landing-page/ http://christinehassler.com/

Christine Hassler left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about . . . but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. In 2005, she wrote the first guidebook written exclusively for young women, entitled 20 Something 20 Everything. Christine's second book, The 20 Something Manifesto written for men and women stems from her experience coaching twenty-something's.  Her newest book Expectation%20Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love, and LifeExpectation Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love and Life is the guidebook for how to treat disappointment on the emotional, mental, behavioral and spiritual levels.  In This Interview Christine and I Discuss... The One You Feed parable. Her favorite books and authors. How we don't have control but we do have choice. What an expectation hangover is. The three things that cause expectation hangovers. The three types of expectation hangovers. The ways we try and cope with expectation hangovers that don't work. Learning to feel our emotions instead of trying to talk ourselves out of it. The spiritual bypass. That an untreated expectation hangover can lead to addiction. Our overwhelming fear of emotions. How unexpressed emotions can lead to other problems. Suppression = depression. Pendulum thinking. How we tend to think our emotions instead of feeling them. The difference between releasing and recycling feelings. One of our favorite books-Pema Chodron- When Things Fall Apart. Not indulging or repressing emotions. The stories we tell ourselves about our emotions. How the desire of our ego and the direction of our soul are often headed in different direction. The four components of the Expectation Hangover treatment plan. Role Playing Rx. Her 21 years on anti-depressants. Dealing with depression. Feeling lonely in a group of people. Form versus essence. Thinking about how we want to feel. How looking for things to make us happy is a losing strategy. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.