Podcasts about Sex education

Season 6 of Please Me! comes to a powerful close in Part 2 of the season finale, with Eve welcoming back returning guest Anthony Weaver, host of the About That Wallet podcast, for a thoughtful and expansive wrap-up conversation. Anthony previously closed out Season 5—one of the most-watched episodes of the show—and returns once again for this special two-part holiday finale. In Part 2, Eve and Anthony reflect on the most impactful lessons, listener feedback, and standout moments from Season 6, with a deeper focus on kink education, communication, and sexual liberation. This episode revisits core pillars of sex-positive education, including consent, pleasure, boundaries, aftercare, and navigating sexual “icks.” Eve also shares major milestones for the show, such as industry award recognition, Spotify Wrapped achievements, and how podcasting has become a powerful tool for personal growth, community building, and accessible sex education. Listeners will hear honest, education-based discussions on orgasm equality, sexual wellness tools, STI testing, erectile health, lubrication, toys, and how communication strengthens intimacy—whether you're exploring BDSM, vanilla intimacy, or something in between. This is a celebratory and empowering Season 6 finale (Part 2) honoring growth, curiosity, connection, and unapologetic big clit energy. Topics Covered in This Episode Season 6 reflections and podcast growth milestones Why communication is the foundation of sexual satisfaction Kink education, BDSM basics, and the importance of aftercare Understanding sexual “icks” and navigating consent respectfully Role-play as a communication and connection tool Sensation play, pain scales, and the traffic-light consent system Sexual health testing, STI awareness, and oral/anal screening Erectile health, edging, penis pumps, and extenders (education-based discussion) Toys as tools for pleasure, connection, and orgasm equality The orgasm gap and how partners can close it together Holiday giveaways, Patreon exclusives, and listener support Guest Information Anthony WeaverHost, About That Wallet Podcast Referenced Episode: Financial Trauma & Money MindsetListen on Spotify Connect with Eve Website: https://pleaseme.online Visit the site for podcast links, sponsors, sexual wellness resources, and educational tools. Mentioned Resources & Sponsors Shameless Care — At-Home Sexual Health TestingUse code PLEASEME for $15 offhttps://shamelesscare.com SDC.com — Free Trial MembershipGet your FREE SDC trial membershipUse code: 37340https://www.sdc.com Parlor Gameshttps://www.parlor-games.com/shop/?AFFID=571343 LifeWavehttps://lifewave.com/PleaseMe Bonnie's Herbalshttps://www.bonniesherbals.com/?AffId=3 CAKEShttps://cakesbody.com/?ref= Please Me! Podcast Patreon — Extended Episodes & Bonus Contenthttps://patreon.com/PleaseMePodcast All affiliate links are also available directly at:https://www.youtube.com/@PleaseMe-PodcastwithEve Be a Guest on Please Me! Podcast Interested in being featured on Please Me! with Eve Hall?Apply through PodMatch:https://podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/beaguestonpleasemepodcast World Vision — Philippines Disaster Reliefhttps://worldvision.org Giving Back Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, the focus is on clergy abuse—a topic made even more pressing by recent headlines. The featured guest, Sandy Phillips Kirkham, shares her harrowing ordeal of being abused by a charismatic youth pastor starting at the age of 16. Sandy discusses the grooming process, the five years of abuse, and how she was ultimately expelled from her church while her abuser was merely relocated. She delves into the long-lasting impact of the abuse on her life and her spiritual journey, how she concealed her trauma for 27 years, and how she ultimately confronted her abuser. Sandy also provides valuable insights and actionable advice for preventing abuse and supporting victims within church communities. Her story is also detailed in her book, ‘Let Me Prey on You,' which offers a detailed account of her journey from victim to advocate. 00:00 Introduction and Sponsor Message 00:47 Welcome to the Podcast 01:32 Introducing Today's Topic: Clergy Abuse 02:17 Sandy Phillips Kirkham's Early Life and Church Involvement 06:22 Meeting the Abuser: The Charismatic Youth Pastor 08:43 Red Flags and Grooming Tactics 13:51 The First Inappropriate Act 16:37 The Abuse Escalates 21:06 The Aftermath and Church's Response 28:15 Life After Abuse: Marriage and Keeping Secrets 32:09 Protecting Future Generations 35:17 The Importance of Sex Education in the Church 36:32 Techniques for Discussing Sex with Children 37:22 Personal Experiences with Sex Education 38:20 Triggering Memories and Emotional Breakdown 40:13 The Journey of Healing Begins 41:31 Understanding Clergy Abuse and Self-Forgiveness 43:52 Confronting the Abuser 47:07 Challenges in Seeking Justice 54:47 Preventing Abuse in the Church 01:00:31 Supporting Victims of Clergy Abuse 01:05:07 Final Thoughts and Resources Sandy Kirkham and her husband Bill enjoy life with their two grown children, two beautiful granddaughters, and two fairly well-behaved dogs. Sandy continues to use her voice to help victims of clergy abuse. She currently serves on the board of Council Against Child Abuse. Sandy has spoken before the Ohio Senate, a Maryland court, and appeared on a local television show in Boston. Her story, “Stolen Innocence,” was told in a documentary produced by The Hope of Survivors. Sandy works with survivors conducting victim support conferences. She has participated in The Voice of the Faithful (VOTF) panels moderated by SNAP (Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests), sharing her perspective from the non-Catholic point of view. Sandy has been a presenter/speaker at major events on clergy abuse including the Hope & Healing Conference. Sandy has earned a certificate of completion from the Faith Trust Institute entitled, “A Sacred Trust: Boundary Issues for Clergy and Spiritual Teachers.” https://sandyphillipskirkham.com/ https://www.facebook.com/KirkhamAuthor/  sandykirkhamauthor@gmail.com  Purchase her book “Let Me Prey Upon You” on amazon: https://sandyphillipskirkham.com/shop/let-me-prey-upon-you/   Link Tree   Website: https://dswministries.org Subscribe to the podcast: https://dswministries.org/subscribe-to-podcast/ Social media links: Join our Private Wounds of the Faithful FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1603903730020136 Twitter: https://twitter.com/DswMinistries YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxgIpWVQCmjqog0PMK4khDw/playlists Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dswministries/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DSW-Ministries-230135337033879 Keep in touch with me! Email subscribe to get my handpicked list of the best resources for abuse survivors! https://thoughtful-composer-4268.ck.page #abuse #trauma Affiliate links: Our Sponsor: 753 Academy: https://www.753academy.com/ Can't travel to The Holy Land right now? The next best thing is Walking The Bible Lands! Get a free video sample of the Bible lands here! https://www.walkingthebiblelands.com/a/18410/hN8u6LQP An easy way to help my ministry: https://dswministries.org/product/buy-me-a-cup-of-tea/ A donation link: https://dswministries.org/donate/   Sandy Phillips Kirkham [00:00:00] Special thanks to 7 5 3 Academy for sponsoring this episode. No matter where you are in your fitness and health journey, they've got you covered. They specialize in helping you exceed your health and fitness goals, whether that is losing body fat, gaining muscle, or nutritional coaching to match your fitness levels. They do it all with a written guarantee for results so you don't waste time and money on a program that doesn't exceed your goals. There are martial arts programs. Specialize in anti-bullying programs for kids to combat proven Filipino martial arts. They take a holistic, fun, and innovative approach that simply works. Sign up for your free class now. It's 7 5 3 academy.com. Find the link in the show notes. Welcome to the Wounds of the Faithful Podcast, brought to you by DSW Ministries. Your host is singer songwriter, speaker and domestic violence advocate, [00:01:00] Diana Winkler. She is passionate about helping survivors in the church heal from domestic violence and abuse and trauma. This podcast is not a substitute for professional counseling or qualified medical help. Now here is Diana. Hello. Welcome everyone. Welcome to my regular listeners, as well as some new listeners that have joined us today. I have a great guest for you today. We're going to be talking about clergy abuse today. Religious leader, abuse. Pastor, youth leader. You've seen this in the news recently with all these preachers being arrested or charged with sexual misconduct or rape or [00:02:00] pedophilia. I'm sure you've seen the news. Well, today we're going to hear a story about a woman who's been victimized in that way and she's fighting back. So let me read her bio for you. A church is where an insecure 16-year-old girl should feel welcome, happy, and most importantly, safe tragically. For some, the church can become a place of great harm. Sandy Phillips Kirkham details her account of how charismatic youth minister preyed upon her, a betrayal which left her broken with a shattered faith and the ultimate shame of being blamed enforced from the church she loved. Despite a successful and happy life, is a wife, mother, and friend. Sandy successfully concealed her abuse for [00:03:00] 27 years until a trigger forced her to face the truth. Sandy's story will take you on her journey of healing. Her strength and courage will inspire you. Let me pray upon you her book details. Sandy's journey from innocent 16-year-old, a victim to a survivor, and advocate. We please welcome Sandy Phillips. Kirk, welcome Sandy to the show. Thanks so much for coming on. Well, thank you for having me. I'm glad to be here. Wow. So I've been listening to you on the Preacher Boys podcast and thought you had a really great story, and so I wanted to come and bring you on so my listeners can hear your story as well. Mm-hmm. So tell us a little bit about your home and your church environment growing up. Let's [00:04:00] start from the beginning here. Okay. I'm the oldest of five. My parents were divorced when I was about seven, which that was really the impact of my life, of just how it altered everything about that time in my life. Then my mother remarried and we moved in with my stepfather shortly after my father remarried, and so I was dealing with these blended families and it was just very confusing for me at the time, my parents and stepfather did not attend church. So I, I wasn't a part of a church until I was about eight, and that's when my best friend who lived up the street invited me to go with their family, and I went with them and I went every Sunday after that, I absolutely fell in love with church. It was a place that I felt safe. I think it provided for me a place away from home that I felt comfortable and I got attention there. I was very active even as a small child. I went to vacation Bible school, church camp, love Sunday School. I sang in a junior choir. Really, it was a just a great place for me to [00:05:00] be. When I was 13, I was baptized and then my faith really deepened and my involvement in the church became even more so, started teaching Sunday school and teaching vacation Bible school. I started serving on committees with adults and doing more of the activities that would, , just be more in depth than just typical youth group activities. So, it's just no exaggeration to say that if the doors of the church were open, I was there and I loved it. I loved serving God. I felt that was the place for me, and everything about it was brought me joy and peace in the church. Wow. You really, were very sincere in your faith. It was not a fake one. I hear a lot of stories of. Being brought up in the church and being made to go to church and, you just go through the motions kind of thing. But it sounds like it was the opposite for you. It was that you really believed this with all your heart. Was that a fundamental Baptist church you were going [00:06:00] to or what? It was a church, Christ Christian Church, which is similar to the Baptist. It's an independent church. Yeah, that's the church. That was so something happened while you were serving the Lord and loving God. You met your abuser? Yes. Shortly after I turned 16, our church hired a new youth pastor, and from the moment he arrived, he was totally different than anyone we'd ever seen before. He was very charismatic, very dynamic. His sermons were really like nothing we'd ever heard before, and people were just drawn to him. He had a personality that people found themselves wanting to be around him. They wanted to please him. So he was very good at asking people to do things and they didn't hesitate. It, it was just a different kind of atmosphere. When he came to the church, the youth group exploded in numbers. We went from like 25 to almost 200 in a very short time. Even the [00:07:00] adult church was growing because people just came to hear him preach because he was so good at what he did. He was 30, married with two children, but he really acted more like our age group. He dressed like we did. He. Went to our football games at school, he knew our music. So he just, he really, he was tuned into us and in return we found ourselves, all of us being willing to please him and wanna do anything we could to make the youth group and the church better. So when people think of a profile of a child abuser, they usually think, oh, some dirty old man, that his roaming fingers or what have you, but this youth pastor sounded like, okay, he was really good looking and hip and really loved the young people. Mm-hmm. Is that typical of. Well, it's, it's typical in the sense that it's not the, dirty old man hiding in the bushes. Most abusers [00:08:00] are people we know. They're people that we like. They're usually people that, connect with people very well, and that's what makes them so dangerous because they're not obvious with what they do, and they're very good at that. They pretend to be one of us. They pretend to care, but in reality, their goal is to find a way to take advantage of the most vulnerable in, in the group. And so, predators are usually drawn to places where they will find vulnerable people. The gymnastics team is an example of that. The Boy Scouts, anywhere where you can, and certainly the church because we are welcoming into people who are in need. Oftentimes. Then there are many people in the church who are vulnerable to these types of men, and sometimes women. Were there any red flags? That you should have seen or noticed when you were around this youth pastor? Well, he came with so many different ideas and different ways of doing things. And one of the things that he was doing now, this was in the [00:09:00] seventies, so cultures were changing and it was free love and kind of thing. But he came into our church and he expected everyone to hug each other. So we were always hugging each other. And he also expected us to say how much we loved each other and that we love you and not just that I love you in Christ. He would simply walk up, give you a hug and say, I love you. Now you know, that may seem innocent, but that's a little odd for that pastor to be saying those kinds of things. And it also blurs the lines because when you say to someone, I love you, that can be confusing to. Young teenagers and even to vulnerable adults. So, but he did that with everybody. It wasn't like he picked someone else special, but, so the hugging in the contact was kind of a red flag in the beginning. But for me personally, I babysat for his family. His wife worked evenings. Mm-hmm. So one night after he came home, he asked me to go to his basement and listen to a song by Neil Diamond. [00:10:00] Well, it felt a little weird 'cause I'd never. I've been around a pastor that wanted to talk to me about anything but church in the Bible. But I went to the basement. Yeah. I mean a Neil Diamond song. So I went to the basement. I know, but that's a trigger factor for me sometimes. So anyway, I went to the basement and he put this record on and I sat down on the couch and instead of sitting in a chair or another place, he came on the couch and sat very close to me. And I remember feeling uncomfortable, but I didn't say anything. 'cause I thought, well, he is just sitting next to me. It's no big deal. But that's a red flag that I felt because it felt uncomfortable to me. And then the other times that I would babysit for him. His wife wouldn't come home till late in the evening, so he would come home around seven or eight and after the kids were in bed, instead of taking me home, he wanted me to sit and talk with him all evening. So we'd talk about the Bible or we'd talk about church, and sometimes he'd ask me what I thought of his [00:11:00] sermon, which at age 16, I'm flattered that this man has any idea that I would have some opinion about this great sermon that he just gave. So I didn't see anything wrong with that because he's my pastor. But had that occurred with my 30-year-old neighbor down the street, every time I went to babysit, I know I would've come home to my mother and said, okay, this is weird. Mm-hmm. Every time I babysit, this man wants to sit and talk to me all evening. I mean, what interest would I have as a teenager wanting to talk to this 30-year-old married man? But because my pastor was who he was and he tapped into our common connection of the church and God, and again, many times he would give me books to read 'cause he wanted me to get better in my deep, in my spirituality. So I didn't see anything wrong with it because of who he was. And so I just accepted that behavior, which is another tool and technique. They look for ways to get into you. Mm-hmm. [00:12:00] That don't seem obvious. And that was, so those were two red flags for me. Now as far as the congregation goes, I was in his office a lot by myself, but so were other kids, because he would actually call us into his office and say, I want you to come in and tell me what's going on in your life. Talk to me about your problems. Instead of us going to him, he would encourage us to come into his office. So while that probably wasn't a good thing, no one saw it as a bad thing. It seemed normal, but he called me into his office a lot more than the other kids. And later on there were people who did say to me, there were times when I wondered why he said something to you like that, or I noticed something one time. And so I think people notice some things, but no one thought enough of it to say, okay, there's something going on that doesn't seem right. So those were the red flags that I think in the beginning were very subtle. But they were hard to see, [00:13:00] and this is really important to distinguish these things because I was groomed by a guidance counselor in seventh grade. Mm-hmm. But he was one of those dirty old men that, he was doing creepy stuff. Yeah. But I never would have seen myself. A pastor and he's talking about spiritual things and he's talking about God and mm-hmm. He's not talking about sex. He's not watching, you're not watching dirty movies together. No, he's not, buying you sexy lingerie. It's, Hey, he's doing spiritual things. Mm-hmm. It's a setup. It's that grooming process you're talking about. It's pulling someone in to gain their trust, in a very di diabolical way, because he's using the church to do that. That's really scary. That scares mm-hmm. Scares me to death. What were the first times that he did something really inappropriate that you were just like, whoa? Well, the very [00:14:00] first time, was after a youth group meeting that was held in my home. I was the song leader. He put me in a leadership position, and it was very important to him that the evening always go well and that we were to make people feel welcome. And so at the end of the evening, I was nervous because I wanted to make sure that he thought everything went well. And he came up to me in my hallway and began telling me how great the evening was and how proud he was of me. And I was on Cloud nine. I was flattered that he felt that way. I felt good that the evening went so well. And then he just slowly bent down and he kissed me. And it wasn't, it was a kiss, but it seemed somewhat innocent to some extent. And I, I remember thinking, I think he just kissed me. Then my next thought was, well, he's my pastor and I don't think he would be doing anything he shouldn't be doing. And it was just a quick kiss. And he's always hugging people. And so maybe this is just his way of showing his appreciation for the evening. It was really [00:15:00] the only way in my 16-year-old mind that I could justify it because I couldn't think about this man doing anything he shouldn't be doing. And this was a person that everyone loved and thought so highly of, so how could I think he was doing something he shouldn't be doing? So I just let it go. I didn't think anything more about it. I mean, did you have any sex ed or anything? Did you know the birds and bees? Nine. Well, yeah, I'm 16. I did. Yeah, I did. But I wasn't, I hadn't dated much. I wasn't allowed to date till I was 16, so I hadn't had any dating experience. I had one kiss before this with a boy at camp. So I wasn't. Worldly or knowledgeable about all those things. But, and again, it was such a quick innocent type kiss. He didn't grab me, he didn't push me against the wall. I just, and again, I think for me it was okay if he's, if this is more than just a kiss, then what do I do with it? So therefore I'm just gonna say it's [00:16:00] nothing because I don't know what else to do. Um, wow. I let it go. I let it go. But as I babysat for him, he, sometimes when I would leave, he would kiss me and sometimes he wouldn't. So, I didn't see it as a con, kind of a continual thing that he was always wanting to kiss me. He always hugged me. But the kissing became more intense as it went along. So it, it would be another year, before he would have sex with me. And so that grooming process and kind of pushing the boundaries each time he was with me, finally ended with him having sex with me. Oh, wow. Now, some of us listening are like an adult having sex with a child or 16-year-old. Can you unpack that a little bit more, the process of how he got to that point? I mean, that the first time you had intercourse, I mean, did he, you know, go to a hotel with you and you had a candlelight dinner, or was it in the backseat of the car?[00:17:00] Was it an accident? It wasn't an accident. He was very deliberate and I had every intentions of having sex with me that night. I babysat, I was babysitting, I put the kids to bed, I walked down the steps. I assumed that we would go into the living room. Or the family room, sit on the couch and talk about the things we always talked about. But instead, he stopped me at the bottom of the stairs and he took me into the living room, and immediately put me on the floor and began undressing me. Um, and wow, I froze. I, I literally froze and I kept thinking to myself, he's going to stop. He's going to stop. And that the entire time he's whispering into my ear how much he loves me, that he would never hurt me, and that he can, I can trust him. And then he kept asking me, do you love me? Do you love me? And I, of course, I'm answering yes, because well, yes I do, because that's what I've told him for the past year. I, I, I just, I was so confused and what my real reaction was, I froze. Mm-hmm. Um, he, he sort of pushed my head under the [00:18:00] stereo. And so when he is starting to get farther than I thought he would ever go. I blocked, I just blocked it out and I started reading the serial numbers underneath the stereo. Oh my goodness. Just to be thinking of anything else. Um, at one point he then just picked me up and took me upstairs. He literally put me on the bed, penetrated me, and that was it. And I was horrified. I was absolutely horrified. I, I wanted to cry. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. Um, he left the room, told me to get dressed, and he would take me home. And I remember sitting on the bed and I put the bedspread around me because I was so embarrassed that I didn't have my clothes on. Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. Um, and then I just remember thinking I just had sex. I'm no longer a virgin. I just had sex with this man and. He took me home. Now, in the [00:19:00] book, of course, I go into a little bit more detail, but Right, he took me home and just before I got outta the car, he said to me, now, you know, this is something between the two of us, you can't tell anyone. And of course I'm thinking, who would I tell? I, I don't want anybody to know. I just did this. So, that was the first time. And then I think I, at that point I kept thinking, you know, I've had sex with him. So now I'm committed to him again. I'm at this point, I'm 17 years old. I'm still like, what do I do with this? I don't, I don't know what to do with this. Um, and he was convincing me that he loved me. He was convincing me that he needed me in his ministry and that God, this was God's will in our lives. He threw that at me. Eventually he would say to me that we were married in God's eyes. I mean, twisting the scripture and using God as a reason that we should be together. And so. I started to accept that. There were a couple times I went to him and told him that I couldn't do this anymore. I felt [00:20:00] guilty. He would respond in one of two ways. One, he would say to me how much he needed me, how much he loved me, and that he couldn't live without me. So that was the guilt part of it. Or he would respond and by saying to me, you know, you're no longer a virgin. No one else is gonna want you. I'm the only one that knows how to love you, and you are committed to me, and this is gonna be the way it is. And I saw no way out. I didn't see a way out. And so the relationship continued for five years. Wow. Five years. It went on for five years. That is a long time. And it, during that time, he became more aggressive physically. Uh, he hit me. He became sexually more deviant. It just progressed. It got worse and worse. And to a point that I finally, I was, my self-esteem was so low. I hated myself for what I'd been doing. So I finally just accepted that this was my life. I knew [00:21:00] I'd never get married. I knew I'd never have children, and this wouldn't be over until he said it was over. This went on for five years and nobody in the church noticed it. Your parents didn't notice it. You know, people say, well, where were your parents? Well, first of all, my parents were thrilled. I was in church. I mean, this was a time in the seventies when drugs were. Prevalent girls were, having free sex. So for them, what safer place could there be than to be in church? So, and they saw his intention toward me and his involvement with me as a good thing. I mean, he would take me on hospital visits with him. I mean, they saw this as being positive. And they knew how much I loved being there and that it was a place that I liked to go. So they didn't see it. And many in the church didn't see it began because who suspects the pastor of such behavior. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And especially in the seventies when this wasn't an open topic like it is now, you wouldn't have dared thought anything like that. And so [00:22:00] it's not uncommon for people in the church, to miss the signs and to ignore what they really do see, because they just can't believe that it would be something that would be happening in their church because then they'd have to do something about it. Yes, exactly. When did it all come crumbling down? It does crumble. Eventually it does. Two elders became suspicious and followed him one night and found us together in a hotel room. And then from then on, the next month and a half was an absolute nightmare for me. Hmm. It was initially hoped that they could keep what he had done, quiet and keep it from the congregation. Now, I have to say one thing before I forget. This wasn't his first incident of sexual misconduct. Oh. Prior to and just after he was awri, he arrived at our church. A young woman from his first church came forward and accused him of sexual misconduct. When he was [00:23:00] confronted by my elders, he didn't deny it. He said it was true. He asked for forgiveness, that it would never happen again. It was a mistake. So within six months. That's when he was kissing me in my hallway. So this, so these elders were aware that this was the second time that there had been an incident with this man of sexual abuse and misconduct. But in spite of that, they tried to keep it quiet in hopes of moving him to another church. And so I was told during that time where I was to sit, how I was to respond to questions. I wasn't to talk to anyone. I wasn't to tell anyone about what had happened, including my parents. And this was all in an effort to keep it quiet. Well, that effort failed. And so it was determined that he should address the congregation. He did it in a very vague way, just simply said that he'd sinned. He'd sinned against God, and he'd sinned against his wife. And that was his confession. That was it. Two days later, he had me meet [00:24:00] him in a hotel room after that confession in front of the congregation. Now. He was moved to the next church. He was given a going away party. There was actually a vote to maybe keep him, but the vote failed and they decided to move him to the next church. About, two weeks, three weeks later, I was called in by the elders, and this is probably the hardest part of my story for me. Mm-hmm. I was called in by the elders and I was told that because of my behavior I was to leave the church. I was devastated. I loved that church. It was the only church I knew, and here I was being told by these two elders that I wasn't fit to worship there any longer. Mm-hmm. He could be forgiven and given a second, third chance. I couldn't be, I was told that to leave the church. I wasn't given any counseling. I wasn't helped in any way. I was simply told to leave and I did. I left. [00:25:00] And that I told people many times, as horrific as the abuse was, having been told to leave, that church had a greater impact on me spiritually than the actual abuse did. I don't think I ever recovered from that. It still haunts me to this day to some extent. That response of the church really devastated me. So that was the crumbling, as you called it? It came crashing down and I would, I left the church. So did that change your perception of God? What was your relationship with God this time? Yes. You were kicked outta the church, but. Well, I felt a disconnect from God. I never blamed God. I never felt like God caused this to happen. I, in fact, I carry the blame and the shame. I felt guilty for what I had done. And so I never blamed God, but because of the relationship being tied in with God and the [00:26:00] prayers that this man would give, and then, you know, he'd give these wonderful sermons about marriage and sanctity of marriage on a Sunday morning after having sex with me the night before. I had difficulty separating all of that, and there were so many trigger factors associated with the church and prayer that God really did. It was hard for me to have any kind of relationship with God. I did. I didn't become an atheist like a lot of victims do, and who become angry at God. I simply just. I just put him on the back burner. I knew he existed, but I didn't have a connection with him any longer. So for 27 years, I, I never prayed. I never opened my Bible. I went to church because when I met my husband, he was a Methodist. And I thought, well, I'll go to the Methodist Church. It's a different denomination. Mm-hmm. I'll just go on. It should be fine. It didn't work that way. I had anxiety attacks in church. I, his [00:27:00] reminders of him were constant, but I forced myself to go. I made sure that I went because I knew when we had children, I wanted them to have that church experience. But every time I walked past the minister's office, I got a knot in my stomach. Oh yeah. It had nothing to do with that minister. But you understand that. I mean, it, but I did that for 27 years. It became my norm. I just knew that when I walked past that office, I was gonna get a knock my stomach, certain hymns. I can tell you what his favorite hymn was, and every time that was played, that's who I thought of. I couldn't pray. It was so, I did have a deep, deep disconnect for 27 years, and I have to tell you, I missed it. I actually mourn that loss of my spiritual life, but I didn't know how to get it back. Because I'm keeping this secret. I'm still carrying guilt and shame. I couldn't forgive myself. I didn't feel worthy to be in church. So with all of that mixed in, I just put myself on autopilot and said, [00:28:00] well, this is the way my life will be and I'll just have to accept it. It just sounds so unfair. Somebody that loves the Lord so much and served in the church and so innocent and being kicked out. Oh, but it sounded like maybe meeting your husband would've been a positive thing for you. How did you guys meet? I actually worked at his office, so I met him there. We dated for about two years, and I just found him to be a kind, loving soul. He was very unassuming. He wasn't arrogant. He didn't, he wasn't a boastful type of person. He didn't like taking credit for things, even though he deserved it sometimes. He was just a good hearted person, and I just, I fell in love with him immediately. I really did. I thought this was a great, great guy. I mean, I will tell you, I have said many times because before I met him, I was on a destructive path. I did not have any self-esteem. [00:29:00] I saw myself just simply as some sex object that, I was only good for that. And so when I met him, he saved my life because he loved me for who I was and showed me that I was worthy. So I've often said to him, you saved my life, and he will respond back with you made mine, and you can't get any better than that. So meeting him was a turning point for me, but I kept a secret from him for 27 years, and I lived in fear that he'd always find out that I'd had this affair with a married man. And I know in my heart that it wouldn't have made a difference to him. But people who've been abused never forget the words, don't ever tell. And I never forgot those words. And I never forgot what the consequences could be if I were to tell someone. Because when my elders found out, they blamed me. And I, I couldn't bear the thought that if I were to tell him. [00:30:00] Somehow he would find fault with me, or I wondered, would he wonder why I didn't feel confident enough to tell him? Would he feel betrayed that I kept a secret? Would he see me differently sexually? All those fears that I had while unfounded were still present in my mind. And so I never could tell him. And I had to do a lot of play acting and pretending, through our married life in the sense that the times I was having trigger factors, I had to hide them. And I know he would've been supportive, but I couldn't see that. Because while trauma affects you at the time of the abuse, it's lifelong. It doesn't leave you. And so I lived with that for 27 years. So did you have. Intimacy issues when you were together? Was that what you're talking about? The triggering? No, I, know a lot of victims do, and that's understandable. I really didn't, because he was so different from my abuser [00:31:00] and I recognized that my abuser was emotionally violent mm-hmm. And physically, he just wasn't loving in any sense of the word. I was simply used for sex. Mm-hmm. And I didn't have that with my husband. And so I could separate that a little bit. But I think the guilt of hiding the secret had an impact on our marriage as far as my able to be intimate with him in an emotional way. I'm really glad to hear that. I, you are not the first person that I've heard that. The victim has hidden a secret from her husband. I passed her and a pastor's wife and her husband did not know. Mm-hmm. Children didn't know, and it was a family member that was the abuser. And I kept telling her, you've got to tell him. Mm-hmm. You know why? It's because, and I was thinking this when I was listening to your, the other shows that you were on. I'm thinking about your children and your grandchildren. If I was abused, [00:32:00] I would be like. How do I keep my children and grandchildren from going through what I just went through, you know? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Well, that's an interesting thing because most people would assume that my daughter, I would've been all over it and worried sick every time she left the house. Yeah. But I actually had the opposite, reaction because keep in mind, I didn't see myself as an abuse victim. I saw myself as someone who participated, who willingly went into this relationship and stayed in it willingly, which is not the case when you're abused. There's the control, the manipulation, all of those things that play into keeping a victim in a relationship and they see no way out. So for me, I just assumed I got one bad apple in the whole barrel, that this didn't happen to other people and that I had an affair. But my daughter, who I knew, she would never have an affair with a married man, I just knew that. So I. Sent her on [00:33:00] retreats. I sent her to church camp without fear because again, I'm thinking, okay, this just doesn't happen to other people and this is not something I need to be concerned about with her. However, with my granddaughters, it's totally different because now I understand what really occurred and the damage that can occur when you've been abused. And so with my granddaughters, her mom and dad have talked to them, about good touch, bad touch. And I too have talked about to her, but I've been a little bit more probably detailed about it. Mm-hmm. And as she gets older, these men, the techniques change as you get older and they, after they go after teenage girls, so mm-hmm. Hopefully I'll be able to help her understand, what happens when someone's grooming. I want her to understand her personal space, that if you're not comfortable when someone hugs you, it's okay. That's right. Say I, I don't want you to touch me that way. Mm-hmm. Or say if they don't feel comfortable and we put a lot on kids to do that. 'cause here [00:34:00] we're asking a child to say to an adult, no. Mm-hmm. So it's okay to go to your mother or your mom and say, can you tell so and so Uncle Jimmy or whoever it is, I don't wanna be hugged. So we need to make sure our kids understand that their personal space is their space. And if they don't want someone in that space, it's okay to say no. I also think it's important to tell kids that good people can do bad things. Yeah. Because, as we talked about earlier, our abusers are not strangers. They're not mean people. Mm-hmm. They're usually good people. They're usually people who've given us gifts. They're people who help us. They're people who tell us how wonderful we are. So it's hard for children, even adults, to see this individual who. Who on one side is a good individual who does a lot in the church, who's done all these wonderful things. And so we, we have to tell these kids, just because they're a good person doesn't mean they can't do bad things. And so that's kind of the message I hope to get to my granddaughters that I didn't give to my [00:35:00] daughter. And fortunately she didn't have any issues with church or any, anybody abusing her. But I certainly did not, guide her in the right way in that sense because I just, like I said, I just assumed that I was the only one that this would ever have happened to. Well, I think, I hear a lot in the church that they don't teach sex ed because they don't want the kids to go out and have sex. Mm-hmm. And so a lot of these kids are like ignorant as to, what is healthy and what is not proper, yeah. We need to teach 'em that our bodies or are going to respond. They were built that way. God intended us to have feelings. You know, when we are around the opposite sex, that's normal. Mm-hmm. So we need to make sure kids understand. But there are barriers and there are boundaries that need to be taken. But you're absolutely right when we don't talk at it, then we figure it out on their own. And we could, we can all imagine when you're leaving teenagers to [00:36:00] their own devices to figure out things. That's probably not gonna lead in a good spot. No, we have the internet now, which when we, right. When you and I were younger, we didn't have the internet. We didn't have cell phones. No. If you wanted a Playboy magazine, you had to go to that kind of a neighborhood to get something. Yes. You know? Yes. It was a lot more difficult. Yes, absolutely. But too many parents are embarrassed to talk to their children about sex and, you know, everybody listening needs to listen. You need to find a way to talk to them about these things. And one of the techniques that I use with my daughter, just in talking about sex in general, kids don't want to hear their mom and dad talk to 'em about this. So what I did would say, I read a magazine article about this girl who did such and such so that I put it off on something else that's, a non-entity of a person. And I'll say, or Have you ever heard of this? And of course I know she's got a little embarrassed, but I, it opened the dialogue without me coming [00:37:00] out and saying, have you heard of oral sex? Instead, I would talk to her and say, I heard this about this. This is what kids are doing, blah, blah, blah. So you kind of have to find techniques and ways to sneak around it sometimes, but you absolutely need to talk to, because they know it's out there and they're going to experiment. That's just part of being a teenager. Yeah, my parents chickened out. They just gave me a book to read. Same, probably the same book. I got, I forget what it was called. Where did I come from? Or something. It was a cartoon book. Mm-hmm. And I'm grateful for that. And, they just, after I finished the book, do you have any questions? Yeah, yeah. I had a lot of, older people that were friends and I would actually go to my older. Senior citizen friends and ask them questions rather than ask my parents. Right? Yeah, yeah. It's more comfortable that way for sure. Like I said, it's not the topic that we like to talk to with our kids and our kids don't wanna hear it, but being uncomfortable is not an excuse not to do that. And in school you get [00:38:00] the basics of the mechanics of it, but then that ends, that's all you get there as well. And that's not as helpful either. Yeah. The sixth grade menstrual cycle, health class. Yeah, exactly. That's it. They separate the girls and the boys. Yeah. We were all really embarrassed and Yes, yes. Yeah, exactly. Great information. So let's, circle around back to, okay, you've been hiding this secret forever. Mm-hmm. And nobody knows about your past. And then one day you got triggered. So what happened that day? Well, that's the first chapter of my book, and that is one day I was driving to a golf tournament in Tennessee. We live in Cincinnati. I was driving, my daughter was in college. She was playing in a golf tournament. I was driving down there and I was about halfway when I saw an exit sign for the town of Kingsport, Tennessee. And that is the. Town to which my [00:39:00] abuser was sent after he left our church, and it just sent me over the edge. Mm-hmm. All of a sudden I'm thinking, I'm in the town where he lives. Am I close to his house? Am I close to the church where he's now a minister? I mean, even though it'd been 27 years, I thought he was probably still there. I didn't know, but that's what my mind was telling me. I, all of a sudden I felt his presence in the car. I, I could smell him. I could hear him. Oh. I was, it was unbelievable to me what was happening to me. I didn't even know what was happening. I pulled to the side of the road Oh, good. And I sobbed. Yeah. I sobbed for about 20 minutes and I was just trying to figure out what was happening because anytime I had trigger factors before I could manage them, I could control them. I kind of let them happen and then I push 'em back down. Mm-hmm. This one wasn't going back down and I was a mess. I was just an absolute mess. I was able to get through the weekend. I drove back home and all I could think about was, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? [00:40:00] I wanted to stop thinking about him and I couldn't. I spent the next two weeks, really in anxiety. I, my husband would leave for work and I would just walk around the house, wring my hands, trying to figure out why I was feeling the way I was feeling. What was I gonna do with these feelings till at one point I finally decided I was gonna tell my best friend, and I was absolutely petrified to tell her because for the first time in 27 years, I was going to utter the words. I was sexually abused by my youth pastor. And I remember thinking, he's gonna find out and I'm gonna get in trouble. I just, I was 49 years old and I'm still afraid of this man. But I did tell her, it was, it took me a long time to, to get the words out, but I did, she was very supportive. She was very kind. She was patient as she waited for me to tell her. And so that started my journey of healing just by telling that first person. I then told two or three other of my close friends, so the four of us spent [00:41:00] many days and many hours on the screened in porch of one of my friends just letting me talk. Mm-hmm. And being able to express what had happened to me. I wasn't ready to tell all of the story. I mean, there's parts in the book that I won't go into here because they're pretty mm-hmm. Embarrassing and some things that I did. So I wasn't ready to tell them everything, but I told them enough that it helped me start to release what had been done to me. And so that was the first thing that I did, I think. And then the next thing I did, which was so valuable, and I encouraged victims to do it as well, I just read everything I could on clergy abuse or sexual abuse in itself. So I began to learn the terms of grooming, manipulation, gaslighting, and then I could see how he methodically used each one of those things on me to get me to do the things he got me to do, and to stay in that relationship for those five years. And that was huge for me. So [00:42:00] it was, for the first time as I began reading, I understood that I had been abused. Now, it still took me a while to admit that I really was sexually abused because I didn't want that label. I didn't wanna be an abuse victim. And there was a part of me. We all wanna be loved. And so there was still a part of me that I wanted to think that there was some part of him that cared about me, that this wasn't just purely about sex and that he wasn't just using me for his own gratification. And I had to get past that. I had to finally come to terms with, no, this man didn't do the no one who loves you, would do the things he did and ask the things he did of me. So that took me a while, to finally admit, okay, this was an abusive relationship. So I told someone, educating myself, and then I had to learn to forgive myself. I had to let, I had to let go of the guilt [00:43:00] and shame because any guilt and shame belongs squarely on him. This was a man that I should have been able to trust. It was in a place that should have been the safest place on earth for me. And he took advantage of a vulnerable teenager who had, I didn't have a major crisis in my life, but he knew my home life was an upheaval at times. He knew that I didn't see my dad very much. So he used that to against me. And I had to forgive myself for being who I was at the time and being able to respond the way I did for the coping skills I had at the time. Sure. You can look back. I, and I think, why didn't I say this? Why didn't I do that? But I couldn't because of, of the re of the relationship he had created between us. Mm-hmm. I had lost all power. He was in complete control of this relationship, so I had to forgive myself and that wasn't easy either. Then, and I don't know that this is something all victims should do, but I just felt this need [00:44:00] that I needed to confront him. I just felt like I couldn't move past this unless I was able to face him. Now, I had no contact with him for 27 years. I didn't even know if he was still alive, but I hired a private investigator and he found him ministering in a church in Alabama. And so I had my investigator contact him and we set up a time and a meeting that we would meet. And I took my husband, I took my friend who was a counselor and another friend who was at the church at the time. Um, I wanted her at this point. You told your husband at this point, I'm sorry. Yes, that's correct. I, it was probably three months after I told my friends, that I said to him I would like to meet him in his office and talked to him about something and. I was terrified. I don't know how else to say it. I just was so afraid. Not that I needed to be, but I was. And I probably sat there for almost, [00:45:00] I would say, 40 minutes and just cried. I was able to finally get out. I'm okay, the kids are okay, and then I started crying again. He couldn't have been any more supportive, more loving. I remember looking at his face and I said I was sexually abused by my youth pastor, and he didn't. His expression didn't change, and then I said. I was their babysitter and his face just dropped. And for the first time, I could see the pain I was feeling was reflected in his face. It was, I almost wanted to hug him to say, I'm sorry. 'cause I could see how much it hurt him to know that this had been done to me, especially as a baby. I mean, the picture became complete for him once I said that. And so he was very supportive. I think he was worried about me confronting this man, for a couple reasons. But one, I think he was worried that I would be disappointed in his reaction, and that I would be expecting too much of this [00:46:00] person to understand what he did to me and show any kind of remorse, and that I, it would hurt me even more. And one of my fears was that, I was afraid he wouldn't meet me. I was afraid that he was gonna say, no, I'm not gonna meet with you. And my husband said, oh, he's gonna meet with you all right? Because if he doesn't meet with you, you just tell him. Call the church secretary. We'll call every elder. We're gonna, he, somebody's gonna hear your story if he doesn't want to hear it. So he did agree to meet with me. I went down to Alabama and the meeting took place and I said the things that I wanted to say to him. I wanted him to get what he did to me. But he didn't, he never could understand the damage. It was almost as if, okay, I shouldn't have done it and I'm sorry I did it. Okay, now what do you want? It was, get away. You bother me? Yes. And his greatest fear as most narcissist, and I believe he was, narcissistic, but his greatest fear was that I was going to demand that he be removed from the ministry. I mean, that's what he [00:47:00] was most concerned about, how this was going to impact him. And he should have been out of the ministry. So I went to his. Boss. I was told this, and something happened 27 years ago. He, we think he's safe. We're not worried, in spite of the fact that during the meeting he had admitted that there had been multiple occurrences of sexual misconduct throughout his ministry. Not all teenagers, some were most were probably women. And then he said he had gone to therapy because he had been identified as a sexual addict. And I kept thinking, who, what? What world, what world? Does this make sense that a man who has been identified by a psychologist as a sex addict belongs in the ministry? Nope. But here was this church. So I sent a letter to his 11 elders thinking, okay, somebody in this eldership is gonna see this. Is I something's wrong here. Not one responded totally [00:48:00] ignored me. 11 elders totally ignored me. Wow. No worries. So then, I decided to go to his denominational leaders, which were in Indianapolis. And there again, while they were sympathetic to my story and apologize that it happened, they said, we're an independent church. Our churches hire and fire their own ministers. We have no control and if they choose to keep this man, we can do nothing about it. And so what, I was shut down and basically I had no place else to go. I had pretty much. Done everything I could do. And it wasn't my place in the man that he be removed. I expected the church to be, the church was to do the right thing. Exactly. I assumed so naively that once they heard my story and once they understood the background of this man, surely someone would say, this isn't right. But again, keep in mind he's very charismatic. He brings in [00:49:00] people, he brings in money. And to be fair, and probably I'm being a little too gracious, these men are very good at manipulating not only the victim but the congregation as well. They're very good at getting control of the congregation so that they find themselves following this man no matter what he would do. Yeah. And that's basically what happened. There was going to be, I got a four page letter from his boss telling me that, know, I'm going to. Ruin this church if I continue on this path and that I'm going to feel all this guilt because I'm gonna be responsible for the damage that I will do to pe people's spiritual lives. I mean that, it was an incredible, I put the letter in the book, I, because it is so incredibly, hard to believe that someone write that to a victim of abuse. Just So that was What year did that happen? 2004. Okay. So we did have. We did have the internet. Oh, yes. And this was after the Catholic, [00:50:00] church had their, exposure of sexual abuse within their church. So yes, this was, it was out there for sure. This wasn't something that you would think, oh, I can't believe this happened. And again, he had admitted to these past instances. I mean, this wasn't someone who was saying, oh, I don't know what she's talking about. Or, oh, this is the only time it ever happened. He had been in therapy because he was a sexual addict, So he wasn't registered as a sex offender? I guess not. And in my case, at the time of the abuse, the age of consent was 16. So I had no legal recourse because of I was either legally age of consent. Now that has been changed in Ohio. It's now 18. It's now 18, but many states it's still 16. There are several states where the age of consent is 16. Now, the interesting about that is. His contact sexual contact with me was not considered a crime. However, if he had been my high school teacher, it would've been a crime. What, so pastors I know [00:51:00] does not make sense. It does not make a leg of sense. No, it does not. So it, they don't consider him a teacher. They don't cons, they don't, they considered an affair. A mutual. Relationship if he'd been my teacher, that's a different story. So yeah, I had no legal recourse. And that was frustrating. But I couldn't change that. So it was what it was. I just had to accept that he, yes, he belonged in jail. Yes, there's no doubt and should be registered as a sex offender, but I'm not so sure that even if he's registered as a sex offender, these people in Alabama and wherever he is now, would. Even take that as a concern. Well, you know, the millennials now, they'll just, they just post stuff on Facebook and Twitter and call the evening news and they have, yes. News people at their doorstep, right. Ready to mm-hmm. Track this guy's name through the mud. Mm-hmm. But you didn't choose to do that, I guess. No, you know, I'm very careful about naming him in the sense that, part of my story is that I [00:52:00] reconnected with his wife. She actually divorced him after they moved, because again, he committed sexual misconduct. She was 20, I think, at the time, so it wasn't a minor, but that's beside the point. This is a man in a position that, a professional who does not cross boundaries like that. So, to no one surprise, he committed sexual misconduct the third time, so she divorced him. And part of, I guess letting go of some of the guilt that I felt, I wanted to. Connect with her to at least tell her, not that I was responsible for what happened, but how very sorry I was for her pain and suffering as well because she was part of the youth group. I mean, she was there at the church all the time. We sang in the choir together. So it was like I had a relationship with her. Oh wow. To some extent. And of course when, we were found, when he was found out by the elders, she was upset and she of course, didn't wanna have anything to do with me, which is understandable. So I actually think I [00:53:00] also wanted to give her the opportunity to say whatever she felt she needed to say to me if she wanted to. I mean, I didn't know what she was gonna say or react. I thought maybe she'd hang up on me. I didn't know. So I called her one day. My investigator found her phone number and gave it to me, and she couldn't have been any more gracious. I, she never blamed me. She understood as she, as the years went on, what this really was just like I did. She's remarried. She's has a wonderful husband now. And so I visited her several times. We keep in contact. And so part of my not wanting to expose him too much is that it would be hurtful to her. And he does have children. Now. I know that, well, whatever consequences are as a result of this are all on him, but I don't feel the need to add to that. That's not my purpose in speaking out. And so, mm-hmm. I've gone to his church leaders, I've done everything I can to get him removed from the ministry. And nothing, it's just [00:54:00] he's still, I don't know that he's still a pastor, but he still remains in good standing within that denomination to this day. Yeah. I mean, sometimes we have to just let God. Right. Dish out the justice. It may not be in our timeline, it may not be the way that we think it should happen, but Right. He's not gonna get away with this. No. And again, I did my part. Yes. So my conscience is clear and I am able to say I did what I could do and whether or not they removed him, I certainly hope that I maybe put some doubt in some of their minds and maybe questioned their motives in keeping this man. I don't know. But, I feel I did what I could do and I feel good about that. I feel good about that. Absolutely, you should. And what I'm really interested in is, you're trying to keep this stuff from happening to other people, so, I mean, what can we do to prevent some of this stuff? Well, it's [00:55:00] difficult again, because these men are among us as wolves in sheep's clothing, and so they're difficult to spot. But a couple things. I think the first thing I would tell people is if something doesn't seem right. Keep your antenna up. Don't just ignore it or just don't think, oh, well that can't be true because he's the pastor. Mm-hmm. If it's behavior that you wouldn't accept in someone else, or it's something that you would question in someone else, then question it in the pastor or the choir director, whoever it is. Don't be blinded by the person. The persona that they're presenting to you. So that's the first thing I would say is keep your antenna up. The other thing is we, and we're churches, I think are doing better about this, but you've got to have policies in place that say, no, you're not taking a 16-year-old girl on your hospital visit with you. Yes. That's, that's not normal. That's not right. What is she doing going on a hospital visit with you in a car? And of course now we have the texting [00:56:00] and there should be absolutely no texting between a pastor, a youth minister, and anyone in the congregation. And that includes, no, don't forget the meeting for the church luncheon. No, there should be no texting because you, it's too hidden and it's too easily moved to the next step. And that's how it starts. You know, all of the abuse when it's someone you know, it always starts with small things and subtle things. It doesn't, innocent things. Innocent things that, yeah, that, that are innocent. But so that's why, so no texting. Yeah. So put in the policy, those places of, when you take a 10-year-old child to the bathroom, you make sure there's another adult with you. Absolutely. That's for your safety as well as for the child's safety. Mm-hmm. So I, I think we need to be aware. And then I would also say watch for the vulnerable in your, among your church or your group. Watch for the kid that's got issues at home and is looking for a father figure. Be aware that they're going to be more susceptible to someone who's a predator and pay [00:57:00] attention to their cues and kind of keep in touch with them as well in a sense of asking questions and how they're doing and be the kind of a person that they might feel comfortable coming to if something were to happen to them because they're the ones that are gonna be most vulnerable, to a predator. So that's kind of, an overview of what. Maybe a help to try and stop and prevent some of this. Yes, I like lots of video cameras. They're cheap now. You can put a camera, you can hide cameras all over the church facility and Yes. And I think too, talking to this about this issue to the congregation before anything happens, maybe having a person in your congregation who is the go-to person on this topic, who, who's researched what all these grooming and manipulation is so that they are even more equipped to, to notice the signs. So you have a person who's kind of in charge of that topic and then address it to the congregation once a year and say, here's our policy and here's what we expect of our pastors and here's what we would hope you would [00:58:00] do if you notice something. So it just brings it out so that people feel like if there is something that they know is going on or something's wrong, they feel comfortable going to someone about it. Those are all really great tips for leaders and, church members. So what, what if I am listening and I am being subjected to some of this stuff, what should I do? Well, what you need to do and what is the hardest thing to do is to tell someone. Yeah. And it's hard to do because when you're in an abusive relationship, you are being controlled by your abuser. And the narrative is what he is directing. And so he's going to tell you, look, you can tell anybody you want. They're not gonna believe you. And he tells you that over and over again. He's also going to tell you that you are going to be in trouble if you tell anyone. And then there's that problem of you sort [00:59:00] of care about this person. Here's someone that has been helping you, who's been your mentor, and you don't wanna get him in trouble. So with all those dynamics involved, it's very difficult for victims to come forward. But I am telling you, you don't wanna wait the 27 years that I did no. And live with this guilt and the shame and the angst and the anxiety. First of all, it's not worth it. You're not doing anyone any favors, especially yourself, because there is help out there. But they can only help you if you're able to be able to tell someone. And believe me, I understand how difficult that is. It's not easy. Mm-hmm. But I would hope that I hearing my story and others that you will understand that there is help out there and you need to tell someone. 'cause it won't end until you tell someone. And if you need to, you go to someone that you trust. And if you need to, you go outside the church. Yes. You tell someone you know is going to listen to you. [01:00:00] Hey, I tell my listeners, you can call me anytime mm-hmm. And email me and I'm sure you'd say the same thing. Exactly. Reach out to Sandy if mm-hmm. You need somebody to talk to. Mm-hmm. Or you don't know what is the next step I need to take here? Right. It is scary to make First step. It's very scary. Very scary. Absolutely. So then there's the rest of us, those that have not experienced clergy abuse, maybe we're members in the church, maybe we're friends or family. What are some helpful things for us to do to support a victim? Helpful things to say, maybe there's things we shouldn't say, well, that's a yes. First, I would say anytime you're aware of a victim of clergy abuse or anybody who's been abused, whether it's clergy or not, reiterate to that victim that it was not their fault and that there was nothing they could have done, should have done that would've prevented this. And by doing that, you are [01:01:00] telling that person they're free to speak to you. And victims need to hear it over and over again because we do blame ourselves. Children as young as five will blame themselves because they allowed someone to touch them 'cause mommy said not to. And the that guilt in that shame that victims carry, it's difficult to let go of it. So to hear someone say to us, it's not your fault is so freeing. So that's the first thing. The second thing I would say is. Let them know that you will listen to them without judging them, and you will hear their story without being shocked that you are able to say, tell me everything you need to tell me, or Tell me as little as you wanna tell me. Give them a comfort place to go to talk. And then I would say, and this is difficult for people who have spiritual lives or who are part of the church, be very much aware that things such as prayer and Bible reading and [01:02:00] scripture can be very triggering for those who've been abused in the church. Mm-hmm. So things that you would find comforting like prayer. Can be a very major trigger factor for victims. And so instead of saying to a victim, I'll pray for you, or Can I pray with you? The best thing you could say would be to phrase it in such a way as to say, I understand because of what you've been through, prayer can be difficult. And so I would like to pray for you, but I would completely understand if you don't want to pray or you won't, don't even want me to pray for you. And so you've opened up the door to say to this person, wow, I don't have to feel guilty because I can't pray. You know, when we've grown up in the church and we've been told how wonderful church and prayer and all those things are, we still carry that guilt too because we're no longer connected to God. So to have a person on the outside. Recognize that these can be trigger factors is again, a gift. It's a [01:03:00] gift. So those things I think would be the most helpful when dealing with a person of clergy abuse. And give them time. Don't push forgiveness. Don't push trying to get them back into church. 'cause some victims will never be able to go back to church if you let them find their own pace of time and you do it without judging them. And I know that's kind of hard sometimes for Christians and people in the church because we love the church and we find it to be such a wonderful place and we want this person back in the church. Yes. But it, it may not be the best place at that point for that victim. Such valuable advice. I That is awesome. And again, back to like, when you're talking about the sex education, open up the dialogue, you know? Yeah. Bring it up. Bring it up before they bring it up. Again, I read in the newspaper that this girl was molested by, a gym teacher. You know that, that ha I know that happens. And then let 'em know that if. It is, like you said, allowing that comfort to be able to [01:04:00] talk to someone. I think for me it was important to give my side of the story. No one had a clue that he was emotionally and verbally and physically abusive to me. They saw this as a little love affair and that we had this, magic little love affair. Evil temptress. Yes, exactly. And so I wanted them to know the full story. That was important for my healing too. And they did that. And, they welcomed me back to the church. I went back, I've been back a couple times for, a youth group reunion that we had. So, and that was difficult. But again, I thought that was necessary for me to move forward. I had to let go of my past. I had to figure out, not to forget it, but how was I going to incorpo

IN  an age where digital platforms are ubiquitous, and traditional sex education in many regions falls short, media—from social media to online forums—is increasingly filling the void. For over half of U.S. public schools that don't offer comprehensive sexual health education, the internet often becomes the default classroom.There are undeniable benefits to this shift. Media offers unparalleled accessibility, reaching vast audiences, including those in remote areas or those without supportive family environments. It can address sensitive questions that school curricula often shy away from, covering topics like sexual orientation, contraception, STI prevention, and even emotional management, often with an inclusivity that traditional education lacks, particularly for LGBTQ+ youth. The privacy of online learning can be a significant comfort, allowing young people to explore sensitive subjects without embarrassment. Social media, in particular, can foster interactive learning and empower individuals to openly discuss topics previously considered taboo, thereby improving sexual literacy. Furthermore, mass media has the power to influence social norms, contributing to a more sex-positive environment when accurate information is disseminated.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/lets-talk-sex--5052038/support.

Award-Winning Sex Education: Lessons from Season 6 of the Please Me Podcast | Season Finale In the Season 6 finale of Please Me!, Eve welcomes back returning guest Anthony Weaver, host of the About That Wallet podcast, for a reflective and insightful season wrap-up conversation. Anthony previously closed out Season 5—one of the most-watched episodes of the podcast—and returns for a special two-part holiday finale to revisit the most impactful moments, lessons, and themes from Season 6. Together, Eve and Anthony reflect on standout episodes and listener feedback while exploring core pillars of sex-positive education, including communication, consent, pleasure, kink, boundaries, and aftercare. The conversation also highlights the continued growth of the Please Me! podcast and its expanding community. This episode celebrates major milestones such as award recognition, Spotify Wrapped achievements, and increased listener engagement, underscoring the importance of accessible, inclusive, and educational conversations around sexuality, relationships, and personal growth. Whether you're a longtime listener or new to the show, this episode offers thoughtful insights, practical takeaways, and a meaningful look back at a powerful season of learning and connection. Season 6 highlights and key listener takeaways Communication and consent as the foundation of pleasure Kink education, boundaries, and the importance of aftercare Sexual wellness tools and sex toys for all genders Erectile health, edging, and pelvic floor education Period sex, sexual “icks,” and respectful sexual negotiation Financial trauma, mindset shifts, and personal growth Podcast growth, awards, Spotify Wrapped, and community impact Anthony WeaverHost, About That Wallet Podcast  Website: https://aboutthatwallet.com  Referenced Episode:Financial Trauma & Money Mindsethttps://open.spotify.com/episode/31neGQ0zMbBV9hwgpFik6M?si=qwGcHsinRVyAt2myNL8c-Q  Website: https://pleaseme.online Shameless Care — At-Home Sexual Health TestingUse code PLEASEME for $15 offhttps://shamelesscare.com SDC.com — Free Trial MembershipUse code: 37340https://www.sdc.com/ Parlor Games — Play-Based Intimacy Toolshttps://www.parlor-games.com/shop/?AFFID=571343 LifeWavehttps://pleaseme.online Juice Plushttps://pleaseme.online Bonnie's Herbalshttps://pleaseme.online CAKEShttps://pleaseme.online Please Me! Podcast Patreon — Extended Episodes & Bonus Contenthttps://patreon.com/PleaseMePodcast Apply through PodMatch:https://podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/beaguestonpleasemepodcast World Vision — Philippines Disaster Reliefhttps://worldvision.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Now joining me today IN THE CHAI ROOM (should I keep calling it that?)  is my dear friend—dancer, choreographer, model, performer and now writer—Tarek Khwiss. This was Tarek's second time on the podcast, and what a special episode it was. A lot of you often ask what it's like having friends on the podcast, and this episode is truly the epitome of that. We have a deep conversation about dance culture in the UK, friendships within the industry, and kindness toward ourselves and others while navigating the creative world. Tarek and I also get into politics and activism—using our social platforms to speak out, and the balance (or imbalance) of doing so while managing a creative, freelance life. We discuss how this seeps into our work, the challenges it brings, and how it has shaped our personal viewpoints. We also talk about being Arab and queer, and dive into Tarek's new business, Haus of Hurriyah, as well as queer spaces such as Hishek Bishek in London . Of course, we discuss Tarek's story “Confessions” for An Ode: Reframing the Classics—which, by the way, you can stream in full now on Patreon. You'll also hear a soundbite in this episode. Tarek's Bio: Hey, I'm Tarek Khwiss known globally for my fresh and fierce vision. Empowering the world through dance, encouraging all to be you, be free, be fabulous! Energetic, sassy & bold choreography, positively disrupting through the medium of dance Based in London, Tarek is a British Palestinian who believes in the power of dance to unite, elevate and help uplift brands through movement. Being a brand ambassador, their aim is to build partnerships with clients to create artistic visuals sharing the story at hand. Working in TV, Film, stage & online, Tarek is capable of adapting no matter the size of the project.  Tarek's credits consist of  choreographing for Layla, the feature film directed and written by Amrou Al- Kadhi. Working with musicians such as Martin Almasri, Decker Park and Valerie Sibanda. As well featuring in commercials as a dancer & model for brands such as: Levis, 02, Spotify, Sky Atlantic, Hunter Boots and shows such as Sex Education,   to name a few. As a content creator Tarek is the ambassador of AKT and has collaborated with brands such as JBL, Dyson, Pattern Beauty, Dirtea, Dunellm, Asda and Tik Tok to name a few. Topics Breakdown: It's Boiling – 5-Second Rule rapid round, Creating friendships and community as a dance teacher, Changes in dance class culture: student consumption and how Tarek's relationship to teaching has evolved, The growth of social media posting culture, both as a consumer and a content creator, Conscious posting and the balance (or imbalance) of activism through creative work. Balancing a political voice with creative expression. New creative venture: Haus of Hurriyah How embracing identity has shifted Tarek's perspective on his craft and the wider industry. Being queer and being Arab. The importance of the people you surround yourself with, while remaining open to giving and receiving kindness. Choreographing and movement directing for Leyla (feature film by Amrou Al-Kadhi): lessons learned and the experience of working on a large-scale queer Arab film. The writing process and creative thinking behind Tarek's short “Confessions” for An Ode: Reframing the Classics. To listen to the short story, subscribe to Patreon and become a Patron/ supporter of Chai with Rai. Social Myself: https://www.instagram.com/chaiwithrai_  & https://twitter.com/chaiwithrai_  & https://www.tiktok.com/@chaiwithrai Guest: https://www.instagram.com/tarekkhwiss/ & https://www.tiktok.com/@tarekkhwiss?lang=en-GB Links Myself: https://www.raimuitfum.com/chaiwithraihomepage  & https://linktr.ee/chaiwithrai_   Guest: https://tarekkhwiss.com/   

A new study from the Kinsey Institute reveals that gaps in what we learned in our youth are still affecting adults, leading to struggles in relationships, a lack of sexual confidence, and even a reduced quality of life.The research surveyed nearly 3,900 single adults across the U.S., ranging from 18 to 98 years old. What they found was striking:  roughly a third of participants never received any information on crucial topics like healthy relationships, consent, communicating with partners, or sexual pleasure from *any* source – not school, not family, not friends. While traditional sex education often focuses heavily on reproduction, pregnancy, STIs, and contraceptionBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/lets-talk-sex--5052038/support.

Join The CommunityPhuong Truong, "just another lesbian in town", is the owner of Twist coffee bar in Thao Dien, a fun place for everyone and a safe space for the LGBTQ+ community.We discuss the LQBTQ+ community in Vietnam in the context of religion, region and generational acceptance.We also talk about sex education in Vietnam in light of a recent story in VNExpress with the headline, It's not working: sex education makes teachers and students squirm and another story about a parent finding her 12 year old child had been watching pornography.Phuong herself started watching pornography at only 8 years old.Follow Seven Million Bikes on Facebook or Instagram.Buy us a coffee.-------------------Theme music composed by Lewis Wright.Main Cover Art designed by Niall Mackay.Episode art designed by Niall Mackay, with pictures supplied by guests and used with permission.Audio Engineer Luke Digweed.These are the programs we use to create A Vietnam Podcast.These are affiliate links so they will give us a small commission, only if you sign up , and at no extra cost to you! You'll be directly supporting Seven Million Bikes too.Editing - Descript https://bit.ly/3FM3IFBHost - Buzzsprout https://bit.ly/3cFbQvkDesign - Canva https://bit.ly/3oW2S2nSupport - Fiverr https://bit.ly/3FI7EXZWebsite - 10 Web https://bit.ly/3HNTOoU"Send me a message!"Support the show

Let's talk about sex… Today, we're speaking to Ita O'Brien - the intimacy coordinator behind the intimate scenes in Normal People, I May Destroy You, Bridgerton, It's a Sin, Sex Education and more…After training as an actor, dancer and movement coach - Ita created the ‘Intimacy On Set Guidelines' - which protects actors and performers during scenes that involve nudity or sex. Her work pre-dates the Me Too movement but was bought to public attention in the wake of the Weinstein scandal. Ita explained why her work is so vital, why having an intimacy coordinator benefits everyone on set, and how creating realistic sex has a positive impact far beyond the actors on set...Ita's book Intimacy guides us through how she helps actors create authentic sex scenes, and how we can use those techniques to rebuild a deeper and healthier connection with our bodies, create a safe space for exploration, and rethink how we navigate sex and intimacy in our own lives and in society as a whole. The book contains behind-the-scenes insights, practical exercises and guidance to help us communicate boundaries and navigate everyday relationships. You can get your copy here!Find out more about Ita's work at https://www.intimacyonset.com/ Follow @itaobrien_ on Instagram Follow @intimacy_on_set on InstagramIf you want to get in touch you can email us on shouldideletethatpod@gmail.com Follow us on Instagram:@shouldideletethat@em_clarkson@alexlight_ldnShould I Delete That is produced by Faye LawrenceStudio Manager: Elliott MckayVideo Editor: Celia GomezSocial Media Manager: Sarah EnglishMusic: Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

******Support the channel******Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thedissenterPayPal: paypal.me/thedissenterPayPal Subscription 1 Dollar: https://tinyurl.com/yb3acuuyPayPal Subscription 3 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/ybn6bg9lPayPal Subscription 5 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/ycmr9gpzPayPal Subscription 10 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/y9r3fc9mPayPal Subscription 20 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/y95uvkao ******Follow me on******Website: https://www.thedissenter.net/The Dissenter Goodreads list: https://shorturl.at/7BMoBFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/thedissenteryt/Twitter: https://x.com/TheDissenterYT This show is sponsored by Enlites, Learning & Development done differently. Check the website here: http://enlites.com/ Nina Hartley is a legendary pornographic film actress and sex educator. She has been described by Las Vegas Weekly as an "outspoken feminist" and "advocate for sexual freedom". In this episode, we talk about Nina's career in the porn industry. We talk about where people's attitudes toward sex stem from, and how the porn industry has changed since the 1980s. We also discuss the feminist sexual revolution, the importance of sex education, sex-positive feminism, issues with feminists who are sex-negative, and whether sex should be part of healthcare.--A HUGE THANK YOU TO MY PATRONS/SUPPORTERS: PER HELGE LARSEN, BERNARDO SEIXAS, ADAM KESSEL, MATTHEW WHITINGBIRD, ARNAUD WOLFF, TIM HOLLOSY, HENRIK AHLENIUS, ROBERT WINDHAGER, RUI INACIO, ZOOP, MARCO NEVES, COLIN HOLBROOK, PHIL KAVANAGH, SAMUEL ANDREEFF, FRANCIS FORDE, TIAGO NUNES, FERGAL CUSSEN, HAL HERZOG, NUNO MACHADO, JONATHAN LEIBRANT, JOÃO LINHARES, STANTON T, SAMUEL CORREA, ERIK HAINES, MARK SMITH, JOÃO EIRA, TOM HUMMEL, SARDUS FRANCE, DAVID SLOAN WILSON, YACILA DEZA-ARAUJO, ROMAIN ROCH, YANICK PUNTER, CHARLOTTE BLEASE, NICOLE BARBARO, ADAM HUNT, PAWEL OSTASZEWSKI, NELLEKE BAK, GUY MADISON, GARY G HELLMANN, SAIMA AFZAL, ADRIAN JAEGGI, PAULO TOLENTINO, JOÃO BARBOSA, JULIAN PRICE, HEDIN BRØNNER, FRANCA BORTOLOTTI, GABRIEL PONS CORTÈS, URSULA LITZCKE, SCOTT, ZACHARY FISH, TIM DUFFY, SUNNY SMITH, JON WISMAN, WILLIAM BUCKNER, LUKE GLOWACKI, GEORGIOS THEOPHANOUS, CHRIS WILLIAMSON, PETER WOLOSZYN, DAVID WILLIAMS, DIOGO COSTA, ALEX CHAU, CORALIE CHEVALLIER, BANGALORE ATHEISTS, LARRY D. LEE JR., OLD HERRINGBONE, MICHAEL BAILEY, DAN SPERBER, ROBERT GRESSIS, JEFF MCMAHAN, JAKE ZUEHL, MARK CAMPBELL, TOMAS DAUBNER, LUKE NISSEN, KIMBERLY JOHNSON, JESSICA NOWICKI, LINDA BRANDIN, VALENTIN STEINMANN, ALEXANDER HUBBARD, BR, JONAS HERTNER, URSULA GOODENOUGH, DAVID PINSOF, SEAN NELSON, MIKE LAVIGNE, JOS KNECHT, LUCY, MANVIR SINGH, PETRA WEIMANN, CAROLA FEEST, MAURO JÚNIOR, 航 豊川, TONY BARRETT, NIKOLAI VISHNEVSKY, STEVEN GANGESTAD, TED FARRIS, HUGO B., JAMES, JORDAN MANSFIELD, CHARLOTTE ALLEN, PETER STOYKO, DAVID TONNER, LEE BECK, PATRICK DALTON-HOLMES, NICK KRASNEY, RACHEL ZAK, DENNIS XAVIER, CHINMAYA BHAT, AND RHYS!A SPECIAL THANKS TO MY PRODUCERS, YZAR WEHBE, JIM FRANK, ŁUKASZ STAFINIAK, TOM VANEGDOM, BERNARD HUGUENEY, CURTIS DIXON, BENEDIKT MUELLER, THOMAS TRUMBLE, KATHRINE AND PATRICK TOBIN, JONCARLO MONTENEGRO, NICK GOLDEN, CHRISTINE GLASS, IGOR NIKIFOROVSKI, AND PER KRAULIS!AND TO MY EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS, MATTHEW LAVENDER,SERGIU CODREANU, AND GREGORY HASTINGS!

Welcome back to Hotter Than Yesterday! Today, we’re joined by the incredible Laura Miano, a clinical sex therapist who somehow manages to make one of the most “taboo” topics feel safe and comfortable. If you’ve ever felt awkward talking about sex or wondered why intimacy sometimes feels terrifying, this episode is for you. Laura unpacks everything from low libido to fear of intimacy, why some of us are total slow burns, and how emotional connection plays a much bigger role in sex than we ever realised. I even open up about my own intimacy blocks and why I get the ick before I've even had a first kiss - Laura helps me understand what is going on in my mind and very much confirms I'm not broken (haha) and hopefully you can take some of these things away with you too! We are so grateful to Laura for having this discussion and normalising these feelings us girls have - we can't wait to have you back Laura! Xxx Find Laura’s work HERE Follow Laura on IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We had the great pleasure of speaking with the visionary owners of SecretSwingerLust.com, a groundbreaking platform that is quickly becoming the go-to destination for swingers worldwide. This innovative website is not just a new entrant in the swinger community; it's a game-changer, offering a plethora of features designed to connect and engage swingers on a global scale.Global Connectivity:SecretSwingerLust.com is tailored to cater to the diverse and dynamic global swinger scene. Its international reach and inclusive design make it a hub for swingers from all corners of the world, fostering a vibrant and interconnected community. Whether you're a seasoned swinger or new to the lifestyle, this platform provides a welcoming space to explore, connect, and grow.Comprehensive Features:The site boasts an impressive array of features that cater to the varied needs of its users. Here's a deeper dive into what makes SecretSwingerLust.com stand out: Blogs: The platform features a dynamic blog section where users can share their stories, insights, and experiences. This space encourages open dialogue and allows swingers to learn from each other, offering a wealth of knowledge and personal anecdotes that can enrich one's journey in the lifestyle.Profile Pics and Videos: Users can create detailed profiles that showcase their personalities and preferences through photos and videos. This visual aspect of the site adds a layer of authenticity and helps users connect on a more personal level, making it easier to find compatible partners.Group Creation: One of the standout features of SecretSwingerLust.com is the ability to create and join groups. Whether you're looking to form a local swingers' club, organize themed events, or connect with others who share your specific interests, the group function facilitates these connections seamlessly.Play Dates and Travel Planning: The site also offers a unique feature that allows users to find play dates and plan encounters during their travels. This is particularly useful for swingers who enjoy the thrill of spontaneous encounters or those who wish to explore the swinger scene in different parts of the world.Innovative Design and User Experience:The owners of SecretSwingerLust.com have put a significant emphasis on creating a user-friendly and visually appealing interface. The site is designed with the user in mind, ensuring that navigation is intuitive and that all features are easily accessible. This focus on user experience enhances the overall engagement and satisfaction of the community.Community and Support:Beyond the features, SecretSwingLust.com is committed to building a supportive and inclusive community. The owners emphasize the importance of fostering a safe and respectful environment where swingers can freely express themselves and form meaningful connections. They also offer resources and support to help new swingers navigate the lifestyle with confidence.Looking Ahead:As SecretSwingerLust.com continues to grow, the owners have exciting plans to expand and enhance the platform. They are dedicated to staying at the forefront of technology and trends in the swinger community, ensuring that the site remains a cutting-edge and indispensable tool for swingers around the globe.In conclusion, SecretSwingerLust.com is more than just a swinger website; it's a vibrant community and a comprehensive resource for anyone involved in or curious about the swinger lifestyle. With its innovative features and global reach, it is set to become a pivotal platform in the world of swinging.

Dr. Jenni and Daniel learn about how sex toys are chosen and produced at America’s largest sex toy company, Adam and Eve. Guest colleague, Ginger Vickery “sells smiles and pleasure products”. She discusses the company’s best sellers and how to shop whether you are a beginner or advanced user of the pleasure products! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/4Op-8-uVNqU. Our guest in this episode, Keri Green, is a sex therapist in San Diego. She tells us how she got into that work (Judy and I heard echoes of Otis from the TV series “Sex Education”), and how she works with couples to help them find a satisfying sex life. Keri's website is http://kerigreenlmft.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer's newsletter right from our homepage. Bruce's latest book, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other, is now available: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G29NVZ4X Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic Tales from the Bible by Laria Zylber. Find out more at https://lariazylber.com.   #KeriGreen #CouplesTherapyInSevenWords #ctin7 #DrBruceChalmer #JudyAlexander

WELCOME TO PART 2, b*tches! :)We ended Part 1 with how to give your man a good head and the #1 Oral Method to make a girl c*m. Now listen up as Emily shows me the best way to find the REAL G-Spot. We end the episode with tips to not c*m too fast, hilarious fan sex stories and how I ended up in the ER after a fingering gone wrong.Connect with Dr. Emily Morse:WebsiteInstagramSex with Emily PodcastConnect with me on:InstagramYouTubeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode Summary In this special repurposed episode, I'm cross-promoting my recent guest appearance on the Ask a Sex Therapist Podcast, where host Heather Shannon interviews me about some of my favorite topics in sexual wellness. Heather and I dive into Big Clit Energy™, sexual confidence, embodied awareness, pelvic health, and practical strategies for closing the orgasm gap. I also share parts of my own healing journey after sexual trauma, emphasizing the power of communication, consent, and shame-free exploration. We discuss approachable ways to explore fantasies, kink, desire, and pleasure with curiosity and confidence. This conversation is packed with insights for anyone looking to reconnect with their body, build sexual confidence, and deepen intimacy in their relationships. What You'll Learn in This Episode How to embody Big Clit Energy™ Practical ways to close the persistent orgasm gap Why foreplay is essential for female arousal Safe, accessible ways to explore kink and fantasies How communication strengthens intimacy How shame and conditioning impact pleasure Tools for reconnecting with your sensual body after trauma Connect With Heather Shannon Heather Shannon, LCPCWebsite: heathershannon.co Mentioned Resources Shameless Care — Use code PLEASME for $15 off at-home sexual health testing→ shamelesscare.com Please Me Podcast Patreon — Extended episodes and bonus content→ patreon.com/PleaseMePodcast Connect With Eve Hall Website: pleaseme.onlineSocial Media Links: pleaseme.online/contactsSubstack: pleaseme.substack.comPatreon: patreon.com/PleaseMePodcast Be a Guest on Please Me! Podcast Want to be a guest on Please Me! Podcast with Eve Hall?Send a message through PodMatch:→ podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/beaguestonpleasemepodcast World Vision Donate to Philippines ReliefSupport survivors of typhoons and earthquakes:worldvision.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Timothy Gitzen's Unscripting the Present (SUNY Press, 2025) interrogates contemporary sex panics in the United States, looking especially at popular culture texts to conceptualize queer youth survival strategies. Sex panics saturate contemporary discourse and politics in the United States. While such panics have a long history, they are now infused with rhetoric, logics, and methods of security that turn queer sexuality into an existential crisis. Queer youth bear the brunt of this crisis, with their presumed innocence always in danger of being lost. Unscripting the Present interweaves analysis of laws and lawsuits, news media, sociological studies, and popular culture both to understand contemporary sex panics and to highlight how queer youth find ways to survive in the here and now. Developing a novel technique of "unscripting," Gitzen focuses our attention on those impromptu moments when things go awry in representations of queer youth-moments that disrupt securitization's social "scripts." Foregoing well-worn promises of things getting better, texts such as Netflix's "Sex Education", the film "Love, Simon", and the multimodal show "Skam" upend the anxious hyperfocus on what's to come in favor of a hopeful present. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/new-books-network

Timothy Gitzen's Unscripting the Present (SUNY Press, 2025) interrogates contemporary sex panics in the United States, looking especially at popular culture texts to conceptualize queer youth survival strategies. Sex panics saturate contemporary discourse and politics in the United States. While such panics have a long history, they are now infused with rhetoric, logics, and methods of security that turn queer sexuality into an existential crisis. Queer youth bear the brunt of this crisis, with their presumed innocence always in danger of being lost. Unscripting the Present interweaves analysis of laws and lawsuits, news media, sociological studies, and popular culture both to understand contemporary sex panics and to highlight how queer youth find ways to survive in the here and now. Developing a novel technique of "unscripting," Gitzen focuses our attention on those impromptu moments when things go awry in representations of queer youth-moments that disrupt securitization's social "scripts." Foregoing well-worn promises of things getting better, texts such as Netflix's "Sex Education", the film "Love, Simon", and the multimodal show "Skam" upend the anxious hyperfocus on what's to come in favor of a hopeful present. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/lgbtq-studies

Timothy Gitzen's Unscripting the Present (SUNY Press, 2025) interrogates contemporary sex panics in the United States, looking especially at popular culture texts to conceptualize queer youth survival strategies. Sex panics saturate contemporary discourse and politics in the United States. While such panics have a long history, they are now infused with rhetoric, logics, and methods of security that turn queer sexuality into an existential crisis. Queer youth bear the brunt of this crisis, with their presumed innocence always in danger of being lost. Unscripting the Present interweaves analysis of laws and lawsuits, news media, sociological studies, and popular culture both to understand contemporary sex panics and to highlight how queer youth find ways to survive in the here and now. Developing a novel technique of "unscripting," Gitzen focuses our attention on those impromptu moments when things go awry in representations of queer youth-moments that disrupt securitization's social "scripts." Foregoing well-worn promises of things getting better, texts such as Netflix's "Sex Education", the film "Love, Simon", and the multimodal show "Skam" upend the anxious hyperfocus on what's to come in favor of a hopeful present. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, we welcome back a TRUE friend of the show rising actor Reda Elazouar, returning to PCS after first joining us way back in Season 1.Back then he was fresh from Pirates with Reggie Yates and stealing scenes in Sex Education… but now? Reda is officially Apple TV's newest heartthrob, starring in The Family Plan 2 alongside Mark Wahlberg, Michelle Monaghan, and Kit Harington.In this episode, Reda breaks down:How he landed the role in The Family Plan 2What it was like travelling and working with a blockbuster castThe stunt training, madness, and magic behind the filmAnd his current Mount Rushmore of movies — a BIG debate sparks offIt's a full-circle moment, an incredible conversation.Reda's back… and he's levelling up.Tune in now and don't forget to catch full visual episodes on YouTube! @PostCreditScenePodcastA 14HQ Original

Timothy Gitzen's Unscripting the Present (SUNY Press, 2025) interrogates contemporary sex panics in the United States, looking especially at popular culture texts to conceptualize queer youth survival strategies. Sex panics saturate contemporary discourse and politics in the United States. While such panics have a long history, they are now infused with rhetoric, logics, and methods of security that turn queer sexuality into an existential crisis. Queer youth bear the brunt of this crisis, with their presumed innocence always in danger of being lost. Unscripting the Present interweaves analysis of laws and lawsuits, news media, sociological studies, and popular culture both to understand contemporary sex panics and to highlight how queer youth find ways to survive in the here and now. Developing a novel technique of "unscripting," Gitzen focuses our attention on those impromptu moments when things go awry in representations of queer youth-moments that disrupt securitization's social "scripts." Foregoing well-worn promises of things getting better, texts such as Netflix's "Sex Education", the film "Love, Simon", and the multimodal show "Skam" upend the anxious hyperfocus on what's to come in favor of a hopeful present. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/popular-culture

From getting your taco licked to c*mming EVERY time, this week's episode is SO good, I'm giving you TWO parts.Welcome to part 1 besties :)I have Renowned sex therapist Emily Morse join us to teach you how to cum over and over again, so take out your notepad and get ready to take some notes. We discuss how to, love your body and vageen, get your man to go down on you, tips for giving a wifey blowie, facts vs myths about intercourse, the #1 ORAL METHOD THAT WILL MAKE YOUR GIRL C*M EVERY TIME, and more!!!TUNE IN NEXT WEEK FOR PT. 2!!! And don't forget to leave a 5 star review on the apple podcast app!Connect with me on:InstagramYouTubeConnect with Dr. Emily Morse:WebsiteInstagramSex with Emily PodcastToday's episode is brought to you by:Bellesa: EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE WhisperVibeTM OR a FREE Rose toy with any WhisperTM order! CLAIM YOUR FREE GIFT HERE.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this podcast, we delve into the fascinating array of physical responses that occur during an orgasm, exploring everything from the audible expressions to the subtle movements of the body. Orgasm is a complex physiological event that engages multiple systems, and our discussion covers the diverse ways in which individuals may react.We begin by examining the auditory aspects, such as the range of noises that people might make, from soft moans to louder expressions of pleasure. These sounds are not only a reflection of the intense physical sensations but can also vary greatly depending on the individual and the context. We explore how these vocalizations can be influenced by psychological factors, such as comfort, intimacy, and personal preferences.Next, we move on to the visual aspects, focusing on the movements and reactions of different body parts. This includes everything from the subtle flinching or tensing of muscles to more pronounced reactions like arching the back or clenching the fists. We discuss how these movements can be involuntary and are often a direct result of the intense neurological and muscular activity that occurs during an orgasm.

Why are autistic people given a censored version of sex education?  Michael John Carley shares his thoughts on this topic as well as the influence that culture has over attitudes towards sexuality. Michael John Carley is an Autistic Self-Advocate, author, and consultant. He was the Founder of GRASP — the largest organization in the world comprised of adults on the autism spectrum — and the Founding Executive Director of ASTEP, now called Integrate, whose mission is to help organizations identify, recruit, and retain professionals on the autism spectrum.  Welcome to Autism Tips & Tools, where we highlight the best practical guidance from previous episodes of Autism Knows No Borders. Whether you're a self-advocate, a family member, or a service provider, there's something here for you! This conversation with Michael John Carley was originally released on August 6, 2020. Would you like to hear more about the struggle for authenticity directly from autistic voices?  Follow the link in the show notes for the full conversation. Rethinking Unemployment and Sex Education, with Michael John Carley Let's work together to transform how the world relates to autism. ----more---- We appreciate your time. If you enjoy this podcast and you'd like to support our mission, please take just a few seconds to share it with one person who you think will find value in it too. Follow us on Instagram: @autismpodcast Join our community on Mighty Networks: Global Autism Community Subscribe to our YouTube channel: Global Autism Project We would love to hear your feedback about the show. Please fill out this short survey to let us know your thoughts: Listener Survey 

Sex Education for Kids & Teens — Sahil AdeemHow, when, and why to teach it? Sahil explains the urgent need for sex education in a clear, Islamic, and age-appropriate way. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

To access the full version of this episode, join our Patreon. Our community awaits with legs open and lips parted

This week, Elle and Vee play time Fuck-Marry-Kill version of the card game WHOREible Life with Athena. This episode is pure chaotic pleasure — the kind where nostalgia, food, kink, and butt-stuff all swirl into one ridiculous open conversation. We go from childhood games to double-ended vegetables, from grooming disasters to pegging wins, from lingerie-in-public confessions to pee-play experimentation, from CNC fantasies to explicit photo close calls.  Strap in (or strap on)… this one gets naughty.What is Whoreible Life? Playing the Fuck, Marry, Kill version. (00:00)Fuck, Marry, Kill: Rim Job, Being Whipped by a Single Tail Whip, Being One of the Dicks in a DVP (double vaginal penetration) (4:17)Giving Rim Jobs. (5:55)Laser Hair Removal Experiences. (7:06)Receiving Rim Jobs. (10:48)Butt Plugs: Public Play. (12:32)How long can you wear a butt plug? Metal vs. silicone butt plugs. (19:20)Pegging Train Fuck & Spit Roasting Challenges. (27:20)Dildo DP to Pee Play. (30:50)Naughty Photos. (34:18)Fuck. Marry. Kill: Fuck Yourself In The Ass, Consensual Non Consent (CNC) Rape Fantasy, Or Orgasm Denial. (38:37)Free Use Vs. CNC & CNC Scene Car Fucking Scene Described. (40:35)Sex in Public Spaces. (45:46)To Go Commando or Not. (47:54)Countdown to Orgasm. (52:10)____________________________

11-20 Adam and Jordana 9a hour

Feeling lost on the creative journey? Download our 7 step Creative Career Path Handbooklet for FREE by signing up to our newsletter: http://andyjpizza.substack.com --- If you're used to doing work for clients, it can be tough to then create your own solo project. On the other hand, if you're only used to doing your own thing, working for a client can feel impossible! How do you find yourself and your creative voice in the mix of all of this? This is one of the many topics I dive into on today's episode with Composer Oli Julian. Oli is the composer for Netflix's new animated Roald Dahl adaptation of “The Twits”, and has a huge wealth of experience doing music for television for the likes of Sex Education and The Complete Made-Up Adventures of Dick Turpin. This was a guest from a very different side of the creative industry, hope you enjoy! SHOW NOTES: Oli Julianhttps://www.olijulian.co.uk The Twitshttps://www.netflix.com/title/81612165 Producer / Editor: Sophie Miller http://sophiemiller.coAudio Editing / Sound Design: Conner Jones http://pendingbeautiful.coSoundtrack / Theme Song: Yoni Wolf / WHY? http://whywithaquestionmark.com SPONSORS:SQUARESPACEHead to https://www.squarespace.com/PEPTALK to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code PEPTALK AEROPRESSCheck out Aeropress and use my code PEPTALK for a great deal: https://aeropress.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does great sex really mean? And why is the simplest question – “What do you really want?” – often the hardest one to answer?In this episode of The Weekly Hot Spot, Mistress Olivia and Mistress Erika sit down with the brilliant Dr. Jaime Grant – researcher, LGBTQ+ advocate, and author of Great Sex: Mapping Your Desire – for a conversation that dismantles shame, celebrates pleasure, and redefines intimacy from the inside out.This isn't just a talk about kink or technique. It's a deep dive into the emotional archaeology of desire – how shame, silence, and societal scripts keep us from claiming our deepest pleasures, especially when those desires feel taboo. Dr. Grant opens with a powerful admission: she got into this work because she was a “liar” – performing a version of herself to survive a repressive Irish Catholic upbringing. “We all develop a liar,” she explains, “and that liar shows up in our sexuality.” Whether you're a submissive wrestling with guilt, a sissy navigating feminization, or someone whose fantasies clash with their identity, this episode meets you where you are – without judgment.The conversation turns to the “purge cycle” – that all-too-familiar pattern where submissives and sissies throw away their toys and clothes in shame, only to rebuild their collections once again. Dr. Grant reframes this not as failure, but as desire breaking through. Then comes the practical magic. Dr. Grant introduces her “Name Tag Exercise” – a fun exercise tool where you introduce yourself not by your job or role, but by three words that describe your core desires. Words like slut, rope enthusiast, curious, neuro spicy, bootlicker, orgasm controller. Mistress Erika shares hers: “Fun. Curious. Obey.” Mistress Olivia, ever the wordsmith, lands on “Control as Connection,” “Intellectual Eroticism,” and “Transformation.” She reveals how power exchange, for her, is a form of artistic expression – a “ballet” of sensual influence – and how she's turned on more by minds than bodies, drawn to “the space between words.”But the mapping goes deeper. Dr. Grant applies desire mapping to orgasm control, chastity, and tease/denial – not as games of endurance, but as rituals of presence. “If you're just going through the motions,” she says, “it's choreography, not connection.” True power play begins when you're grounded in what actually moves you – the raw, vulnerable parts of yourself that turn you on because they feel dangerous.Fantasy, she insists, is not disloyalty – it's breadcrumbs. Your roleplay scenarios, dark power exchanges, and gender-bending dreams aren't distractions from real desire – they are the map. And if someone tries to police your inner world? “You're with the wrong person."The episode closes with a radical truth: You already have everything you need. The voice of shame – that internal critic whispering, "You shouldn't want this" – that voice is not yours. It's the echo of a priest, a parent, a culture.Desire mapping helps you trace that voice back to its source, so you stop obeying it and start honoring your sacred material: your body, your history, your truth.If you've ever felt like an imposter in your own pleasure… If you've silenced a fantasy because it didn't fit your identity… If you've wondered why surrender feels so terrifying – and so freeing……this episode is your invitation to map your desire – not apologize for it.Tune in. Listen closely. And start asking yourself the question that changes everything:What do you really want?Books by Dr. Jaime Grant on AmazonReach out to Dr. Grant for readings or coaching at jaimemgrant@gmail.com and catch her podcast at www.justsexpodcast.comContact us:Mistress Olivia:Email: Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com.   Twitter X: @MistressOlivia1.     Blue Sky: @MsOliviaBlog: Experienced MistressMistress Erika: Email:  Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.comTwitter X and Blue Sky: @ErikaEnchantrixBlog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy MEET DR. JAIME GRANT Friday, November 21 at Red Emma's Bookstore in BaltimoreDr. Grant and her co-author Jack Harrison-Quintana do exercises from the book and share bits of their kink highlight reels.Wednesday evening, January 21, 8pm at the Washington Hilton Hotel, as part of the Creating Change Conference.  Dr. Grant and her co-author Jack Harrison-Quintana read from Kink for Dummies and share tips.From late January through mid-March, Dr. Grant will be at the SketchPad Artist's residency in Hyannis Mass, offering Desire Mapping open studios every Saturday.  Book readings on the Cape in this period TBD.Friday April 24th @ 7:30pm, at Charis Books in Atlanta, Dr. Grant will talk about Kink for Dummies with Ignacio Rivera, technical editor on the book, and two kink story contributors, Asha Leong and tia marie.

This is The Briefing, a daily analysis of news and events from a Christian worldview.On today's edition of The Briefing, Dr. Mohler discusses the push for abortion on demand by the editorial board of the New York Times, UVA's ceasing of race-based admissions, and Zohran Mamdani's terrifying vision for government reach in all aspects of life in NYC.Part I (00:14 – 13:47)The Editorial Board of the New York Times Calls for Federal Abortion Legislation: We Knew This Was Coming, and It is Now Here – You've Been WarnedAbortion Has Remained Mostly Accessible. That May Soon Change. by The New York Times (The Editorial Board)Part II (13:47 – 18:23)The University of Virginia Admits to DEI Admissions: UVA Announces It Will Cease Race-Based AdmissionsThe first university has admitted to race-based hiring by The Hill (Scott Douglas Gerber)Part III (18:23 – 25:16)‘There is No Problem Too Large for Government to Solve Or Problem Too Small to Care About': Mamdani Just Said Some of the Scariest Words Ever Uttered by a PoliticianSign up to receive The Briefing in your inbox every weekday morning.Follow Dr. Mohler:X | Instagram | Facebook | YouTubeFor more information on The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, go to sbts.edu.For more information on Boyce College, just go to BoyceCollege.com.To write Dr. Mohler or submit a question for The Mailbox, go here.

This week, it's Guys Gone Deep! Elle and Vee are joined by Ricky — their resident anal expert — for an honest, hilarious, and educational chat about what it really takes to feel comfortable exploring the backdoor.From understanding how to prepare your body, to learning the right tools, techniques, and hygiene tips, this episode dives into the practical side of exploration — and the mindset that makes it enjoyable. We cover topics like body awareness, relaxation, communication, common myths, and how to let go of shame or stereotypes around who “should” or “shouldn't” enjoy this kind of play.Whether you're curious, experienced, or somewhere in between, this conversation blends science, self-care, and a healthy dose of humor to help you approach new experiences with confidence and curiosity.Early anal exploration and learning to use lube. (2:27)Anal cleansing to prep for butt play. (8:35)Tools: bulbs or syringes? (13:22)Best positions to clean yourself. Hint: stay upright! (15:54)What NOT to do. (19:54)How to prevent farting or air bubbles. (23:43)Play with butt plugs and dildos. (25:37)Diet: what can I eat before anal? What foods to avoid before anal? (30:14)Internalized homophobia: overcoming the shame of thinking “butt stuff is gay”. (37:05)Training: warming yourself up and inserting your own toys. Using a tongue (rimjob) or fingers to warm up. (41:02)Anal training kits and the best way to train the sphincter. (48:20)Focusing on the receptors in your sphincter to relax your hole. (54:19)What's the best lube for anal play? (57:48)Poppers: what are they, the risks, and the benefits. (1:03:21)Drug-free relaxation tips. (1:06:30)________________________________________

What happens when kids don't get sex ed in school? They don't just “figure it out”—they pick up myths, rumors, and advice on social media. What they learn matters for their safety and relationships.  How can parents help guide an appropriate education?   Use trusted resources like:   National Sex Education Standards  Advocates for Youth - Rights Respect, Responsibilities Curriculum  Planned Parenthood's Parent Resources  Listen: Ep. 113: The “Private Parts” Episode or Ep. 46: Talking About Sex and Privacy    Send your questions to hello@pediatriciannextdoorpodcast.com or message me online here.  Find products from the show on the shop page.   *As an Amazon Associate, I earn commission from qualifying purchases.    This episode is made possible by our sponsor Cure Hydration. Get 20% off your first order at ⁠curehydration.com/⁠DRWENDY with code DRWENDY.    More from The Pediatrician Next Door:  Website: Pediatrician Next Door Podcast  Instagram: @the_pediatrician_next_door  Facebook: facebook.com/wendy.l.hunter.75  TikTok: @drwendyhunter  LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drwendyhunter    This is a Redd Rock Music Podcast  IG: @reddrockmusic  www.reddrockmusic.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Kinky Frame of Mind, Don and Syn catch us up on life. They talk about opening the new dungeon and the wild adventures of dealing with Don's dad. 

Welcome to another episode of "Restoring the Soul with Michael John Cusick." Today, Michael sits down with Dr. Camden Morgante, licensed clinical psychologist and author of "Recovering from Purity Culture." Together, they dive into the real impact of purity culture within evangelical communities, exploring the myths and messages that have shaped so many lives, often with shame and fear at the center.Drawing from both professional expertise and personal experience, Camden unpacks the psychological and spiritual wounds purity culture can leave behind and offers a thoughtful path toward healing, reconciling mind, body, heart, and soul. The conversation doesn't stop at identifying problems; it reaches for hope and reconstruction, offering practical tools for embracing a healthier, grace-filled sex ethic—and even guidance for raising the next generation with greater wisdom and compassion.Support the showENGAGE THE RESTORING THE SOUL PODCAST:- Follow us on YouTube - Tweet us at @michaeljcusick and @PodcastRTS- Like us on Facebook- Follow us on Instagram & Twitter- Follow Michael on Twitter- Email us at info@restoringthesoul.com Thanks for listening!

Why do adult men need sex education? What sexual changes do men's bodies go through as we get older? In this episode, Dr. Doug Carpenter explains what men need to know about low testosterone, urinary flow, sperm production, and more. You'll learn about the importance of prostate exams, the truth about penis size, the difference between sex in porn vs. sex in marriage, and other common misconceptions men have about sex.Join us for sex education in person at the next Husband Material Retreat! husbandmaterial.com/retreatDr. Doug Carpenter is a clinical psychologist, author, and founding board member of Husband Material Ministries. Learn more at douglascarpenter.comBuy Doug's books:Secret Shame: A Survivor's Guide To Understanding Male Sexual Abuse And Male Sexual DevelopmentChildhood Trauma and the Non-Alpha Male: Gender Role Conflict, Toxic Shame, and Complex Trauma: Finding Hope, Clarity, Healing, and ChangeSupport the showTake the Husband Material Journey... Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy Thanks for listening!

Dr. Jenni and Daniel explore delayed ejaculation, teasing out their different approaches to this topic. Listeners get to peek into real-time conversations between Jenni and Daniel, witnessing their marital conversations and disagreements around sex therapy. They define the Arousal Spectrum and why it's so important to work with this in your body to build awareness for optimum sexual functioning. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if the secret to better sex, stronger orgasms, and more confidence isn't another relationship hack—but your pelvic floor?This week, I'm joined by Jana Danielson, sensual health and pelvic floor wellness expert, Pilates master instructor, and creator of the Cooch Ball (yes, that's really what it's called). Jana and I met in a group for sex-positive professionals, and even though she's delightfully monogamous—we don't discriminate against the monogamous here—her work is pure gold for every body.We talk about the 14 muscles that literally make or break pleasure, why so many people struggle with tension or numbness “down there,” and how breathwork, movement, and curiosity can completely transform your sensual life.Whether you're poly, monogamous, or somewhere beautifully in-between, this conversation will help you reconnect with your body, your desire, and your pleasure—because honestly, you deserve to feel amazing in your skin.

Eve welcomes Robert Johnson and Anna Osmon from Shameless Care to discuss the future of sexual health and STI prevention. This episode dives into how modern medicine and virtual care are transforming pleasure, connection, and confidence. They explore the importance of comprehensive STI testing, including often-overlooked oral and anal swabs, and how Shameless Care connects patients with board-certified, sex-positive doctors for discreet, at-home STI testing and online prescriptions. You'll also learn how medications such as sildenafil, tadalafil, oxytocin nasal spray, and topical arousal creams can enhance blood flow, intimacy, and desire for all bodies. Eve, Robert, and Anna also discuss the growing use of DoxyPEP, an innovative approach to reducing bacterial STIs like chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis, and share how modern dating dynamics are shaping the way we approach sexual safety. The episode concludes with a realistic role play on how to confidently talk about testing, consent, and sexual boundaries with new partners. Use code pleaseme for $15 off your first order at Shameless Care. The first 50 orders receive $30 off any medicine or STI test through Tuesday so order today! Connect with guests: Shameless Care  Podcast: The Shameless Care Podcast Connect with Eve:   15-Minute Discovery Call with Eve: Book NowBook a Coaching or Pelvic Health PT Session: Schedule HereJoin Patreon for early releases and ad-free episodesPlease Me! WebsiteJoin Eve's Substack Newsletter — Your Weekly Turn-OnSubscribe to Eve's Column — Big Clit Energy™: A Please Me! Series on ASN Lifestyle Magazine Referenced Episodes:STI Testing Redefined: One Mistake that Changed Sexual Health Forever | Sex EducationAbortion 101: Facts, Freedom, and F*** the PatriarchyYour Body, Your Choice: Exploring Pregnancy Options Without Judgment Support Earthquake Relief in North Cebu, Philippines: Donate via World Vision  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Jenni and Daniel chat with sexuality journalist, and Lifestyle editor for the New York Post, Fabiana Buontempo about her experiences in the dating world professionally and personally. The stakes are higher for men as women create autonomous and lucrative careers; while other women are taking a "pseudo"-celibacy approach to their dating game. Jenni and Daniel discuss with her ways to dating intentionally and manifest what you are ultimately looking for and about her experiences with hot topics like celibacy and the new rules of dating. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We have been dying to discuss an article called  “Why Aren't Professors Braver?” since it was first published in The Chronicle of Higher Education back in September. It's by the psychologist Paul Bloom and it starts with an ode to the professoriate:We tend to be pretty smart. We are sometimes socially inept, but in a sweet way. We are genuinely excited about ideas…We are often generous... mentoring students in ways that don't lead to any tangible rewards.  And we are a peaceable lot. If you're sitting at a bar, minding your own business, and some drunk takes a swing at you, the drunk is unlikely to be a professor.In spite of our many praiseworthy traits, Bloom says that professors aren't particularly courageous. When controversial or sensitive topics arise, he claims that we tend to be “too censorious and too self-censoring.”  “Why,” Bloom asks, “are even tenured professors, people with the most secure jobs on Earth, so unwilling to speak their minds?”We have posed this question many times since we both became faculty members--and we could think of no better person to hash it out with than our friend, UPenn professor Jonathan Zimmerman.Jon is a historian of education who has had a long and illustrious career, first at West Chester University, then at New York University and now at the University of Pennsylvania. He is the author of many books, including Whose America: Culture Wars in the Public Schools, Too Hot to Handle: A Global History of Sex Education, and The Amateur Hour: A History of College Teaching in America. We were thrilled to have him join us on Banished.Show Notes* Here is the article that inspired this episode: Paul Bloom, “Why Aren't Professors Braver?”, Chronicle Review, September 24, 2025* The term “excellent sheep” comes from William Deresiewicz's 2014 book, Excellent Sheep: The Miseducation of the American Elite and the Way to a Meaningful Life* See Jon Zimmerman's official UPenn bio here* The *circling the wagons* article Jon references is available here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit banished.substack.com/subscribe

Sara Davison and sex educator Ruth Ramsay unpack the links between sex, self-care, and authentic arousal. Learn how to reclaim pleasure, overcome guilt, and reset your sex life in just six minutes. A must-listen for anyone healing from heartbreak or seeking deeper intimacy.Connect with Ruth:

Puberty can be confusing and overwhelming for autistic, ADHD and other neurodivergent kids. Periods can be scary and boners can be uncomfortable and embarrassing. I'll show you how to make it clear, concrete, and easier to handle. You'll learn: – How to talk about these two things without making it awkward (for you or your ND kid) – What neurodivergent kids need to know to help them navigate boners and periods – How to make conversations about periods and erections clear, concrete, and calm Watch here: All Kids Episode on YouTube ND Kids Episode on YouTube Got some thoughts or questions? Amy@BirdsAndBeesAndKid.com Learn more! BirdsAndBeesAndKids.com 30-minute Quickie Consultation Get clarity fast with a focused 30-minute session on your most concerning sex talk question. The Birds & Bees Solutions Center for ALL Kids: Neurotypical & Neurodivergent All the topics you'll need to cover as your kids grow up! Puberty, consent, relationship, and sex (of course)!  The Birds & Bees Solutions Center for Parents of Neurodivergent Kids Get the tools to communicate with your neurodivergent kid about sex, consent, and safety—without awkwardness or overwhelm. The Porn Talk Info Kit Simple tools for the porn and online safety talks—plus videos and tech tips to calm your worries. Includes a specific video for parents of neurodivergent kids.

Listener Question from a 45 year old male in the dating scene asks about how to name his desires in the bedroom without it coming off as criticism. Daniel and Jenni discuss the difference between criticism and feedback; why he might be blocked, and how to feel permission and space to name what he wants. It's validating to pleasure your partner for your self-worth, but not at the expense of your own needs and wants. Daniel describes the irony of how being silent about your needs is actually more selfish than speaking up for them. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode of Please Me!, host Eve dives deep into sexual wellness with urologist Dr. Stephanie Zwonitzer. Together, they unpack the often-misunderstood realities of hormone health, vaginal and penile function, and the true causes of common concerns like dryness, low libido, and recurring UTIs. This honest and educational conversation breaks down practical treatments such as topical vaginal estrogen, hormone replacement therapy (HRT), acoustic wave therapy, and even masturbation as a tool for sexual function. Whether you're dealing with perimenopause, erectile dysfunction, bacterial vaginosis (BV), or navigating questions about anal sex, this episode offers science-backed advice and radically honest answers. The orgasm gap and what orgasm equality really means Why topical vaginal estrogen is essential for dryness, recurrent UTIs, and incontinence Benefits and timing of hormone replacement therapy (HRT), especially in perimenopause Hormonal symptoms like joint pain, mood swings, and reduced libido How masturbation and regular orgasms support healthy sexual function Prostate health, ejaculation frequency, and cancer risk in men Acoustic wave therapy for blood flow and improved erectile function Safe, comfortable anal sex: communication, prep, and lube Causes and treatment of bacterial vaginosis (BV), including forgotten tampons and boric acid A realistic role-play discussion with Eve bringing up a common concern with Dr Stephanie Dr. Stephanie is a board-certified urologist and host of Between the Sheets with Dr. Z, a podcast that brings humor and clinical expertise to taboo topics in sexual health. Her approach is grounded in evidence-based care, empowering patients to talk honestly about their bodies. Website: https://drzwonitzer.comPodcast: Between the Sheets with Dr. Z Book a Coaching or Pelvic Health PT SessionWork with Eve virtually or in person.Book a session Visit the Award-Nominated WebsiteExplore coaching, podcast archives, and curated sexual wellness tools.Visit pleaseme.online Join the Community on PatreonGet exclusive content, early access to episodes, and Q&A opportunities.Join now Subscribe to the Weekly Turn Ons NewsletterPleasure-focused, shame-free sex education in your inbox.Subscribe on Substack Read Eve's Column in ASN Lifestyle MagazineMonthly sex and intimacy insights.Subscribe at ASN Lifestyle Magazine Talk with Eve on the OWWLL AppUse code EH576472 for a free introductory call.Download the app and connect instantly. Topics CoveredGuest: Dr. Stephanie ZwonitzerConnect with Eve & Explore MoreNominate Please Me! for a Webby Award hereEarly Entry Deadline Friday, October 24th!:Webby AwardsParlor Games Estrogen and Progesterone topical creams:Parlor Games | Shop Support Earthquake Relief in the Philippines A 6.9 magnitude earthquake recently struck North Cebu, Philippines, causing widespread damage. The area is currently in a state of calamity and needs urgent support for food, shelter, and emergency aid World Vision Philippines – Earthquake Emergency Appealhttps://www.worldvision.org.ph/donate/earthquake-emergency-appeal/ World Vision Philippines Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Jenni and Daniel talk with new mom, Suzie, and discuss the challenges in how to reclaim her sexual identity after postpartum with a toddler and a baby. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode of the award-winning Please Me podcast, host Eve continues her powerful conversation with relationship and attachment expert  Bev Mitelman . Together, they explore how our attachment styles deeply influence sexuality, emotional intimacy, and the way we connect with partners in and out of the bedroom. Whether you're anxiously attached, avoidant, or secure, this episode offers valuable insights to better understand your patterns, improve communication, and create more fulfilling sexual and emotional relationships.  Guest Contact Details: Bev Mitelman Website: https://securelyloved.comInstagram: https://instagram.com/securelyloved Join the Community on PatreonGet exclusive content, early episode access, and the chance to ask Eve your burning questions.Please Me! Podcast with Eve | Destigmatizing Conversations about Sex and Sexual Health | Patreon  Check Out Eve's Award-Nominated WebsiteExplore resources, coaching, podcast episodes, and more.Age Verification - Please Me!  Read Eve's Sex & Intimacy Column in ASN Lifestyle MagazineSmart, sexy, and real talk—every month.https://www.asnlifestylemagazine.com/subscribe  Subscribe to the Weekly Turn Ons NewsletterYour dose of pleasure-focused, shame-free sex education—straight to your inbox.https://pleasemewitheve.substack.com Book a Session with Eve (Coaching or Pelvic Health PT)Let's work together—virtually or in person.https://calendly.com/pleasemebyevecreations/coaching-virtual-session  Talk Directly with Eve on the OWWLL AppNeed quick advice or a real-time convo? Use code EH576472 for a free call!Download the Owwll app on your phone and call. Special Note:A magnitude 6.9 earthquake recently shook Cebu, Philippines, causing significant damage in North Cebu, which has now been declared a state of calamity. Please consider supporting the affected communities: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AngatCebuBPO Email: angatcebubpo@gmail.com Connect with Eve & Explore More Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Jenny and Daniel have a conversation with their guest Andy, who asks how to transition from being a silent sexual partner to creating a strong masculine presence in the bedroom. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Strange but real lessons of American sex ed. Historian Lisa Andersen walks us through the decades. ⭐️ This episode originally ran on August 23, 2017 and is a favorite from the archives. We hope you enjoy, and we'll be back next week with a brand new episode.

We're back in National Tredge territory with multi-award winning actor, ‘Sex Education' and ‘The X Files' star and soft drinks entrepreneur Gillian Anderson. But what is Green Glass Jello? ‘TRON: ARES' is out in cinemas on 10th October. ‘Trespasses' will air in November on Channel 4Buy G Spot drinks at stores nationwide – including Sainsbury's – or online at thisisgspot.comFollow Gillian on Instagram and TikTok @gilliana Watch the video version of this episode on the Off Menu YouTube on Thu 9 Oct.Off Menu is now on YouTube: @offmenupodcastFollow Off Menu on Instagram and TikTok: @offmenuofficial.And go to our website www.offmenupodcast.co.uk for a list of restaurants recommended on the show.Off Menu is a comedy podcast hosted by Ed Gamble and James Acaster.Produced, recorded and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive.Video production by Megan McCarthy for Plosive.Artwork by Paul Gilbey (photography and design). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is The Briefing, a daily analysis of news and events from a Christian worldview.On today's edition of The Briefing, Dr. Mohler discusses President Trump's threats to remove sex education funding for sex ed that affirms transgender ideologies, the parental responsibility of sex education, and the dangers of A.I. chatbots for teenagers.Part I (00:14 – 12:07)Trump Goes After Gender Ideology in Sex Education: The Trump Administration Releases Executive Order to Remove Gender Identity from Sex EducationTrump Administration Puts 46 States and Territories on Notice to Remove Gender Ideology Content from Sex Ed Materials by U.S. Department of Health and Human ServicesPart II (12:07 – 14:55)Sex Education is a Parental Responsibility: Christian Faithfulness Requires that Christian Parents Do Not Relinquish Sex Education to a Secular CulturePart III (14:55 – 25:18)The Danger of A.I. Chatbots for Teenagers: Teenagers are Turning to A.I. Chatbots for Therapy, and It Has Turned into a Four-Alarm FireTeens Are Using Chatbots as Therapists. That's Alarming. by The New York Times (Ryan K. McBain)A Teen Was Suicidal. ChatGPT Was the Friend He Confided In. by The New York Times (Kashmir Hill)Sign up to receive The Briefing in your inbox every weekday morning.Follow Dr. Mohler:X | Instagram | Facebook | YouTubeFor more information on The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, go to sbts.edu.For more information on Boyce College, just go to BoyceCollege.com.To write Dr. Mohler or submit a question for The Mailbox, go here.