Podcasts about your marriage

Guest Bio: Chelsea Damon is the author of I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: How to Fight Less, Forgive Faster, and Cultivate Joy in Your Marriage and Together with Christ, A Dating Couple's Devotional: 52 Devotions and Bible Studies to Nurture Your Relationship. She is also the author of chelseadamon.com, a website where moms and wives are encouraged to cultivate healthy, Christ-centered lives and relationships. Damon and her husband Josh met while attending college, where they grew in their faith and dated for three years. They were married on the windy coast of Washington in 2013. Throughout their dating and marriage relationship and into parenthood, they've been learning what it means to live loving God and others in a self-love world. Today, the Damons have three biological children, are foster parents, and spend their time looking for new places to hike and explore beautiful South Carolina.     Show Summary: Did you think marriage or a specific relationship would fix all your problems and fully heal you? While marriage is a beautiful gift from God, it can also be really hard. Some seasons are filled with joy and excitement while others are filled with anger and arguments. Chelsea Damon realized she was expecting that marriage would make her happy and storing up resentment towards her husband during the first few years of their marriage. Join hosts Elisa Morgan and Eryn Eddy Adkins as they learn how Chelsea overcame her resentment and began to apply grace to her marriage with the help of God. You don't want to miss this God Hears Her conversation.     Notes and Quotes:   “I like to use a little assessment of whether something is starting to be an idol in our lives is, ‘Would I lose my self of identity if [this thing] was taken away? Or would I lose my hope and my future if that was taken away?'” —Chelsea Damon  “[When dealing with disillusionment], I really had to fall back on my relationship with Christ, and in doing so, He really taught me that through fire He really is the only thing that is going to truly fulfill me.” —Chelsea Damon  “One of the great dichotomies in the Christian faith is that when you surrender control, you gain so much more.” —Chelsea Damon  “. . . we're doing the work and we're ready to be receptive to God's Word and what He has to say to us. And that's the only place where what He plants can grow deep roots and get a foothold in our lives to bear fruit.” —Chelsea Damon    Verses:   The Parable of the Sower: Matthew 13:1-23    Links:   Chelsea's Book, I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: https://www.amazon.com/Thought-This-Would-Make-Happy/dp/0310367778  Chelsea's Website: https://chelseadamon.com/  Chelsea's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chelsealeighdamon/  God Hears Her website: https://godhearsher.org/  Watch the Video Podcast Here: https://www.youtube.com/@GodHearsHerODBM  God Hears Her email sign-up: https://www.godhearsher.org/sign-upsfmc   Subscribe on iTunes! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/god-hears-her-podcast/id1511046507?utm_source=applemusic&utm_medium=godhearsher&utm_campaign=podcast  Elisa's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elisamorganauthor/  Eryn's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/eryneddy/  Vivian's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vivmabuni/  Our Daily Bread Ministries website: https://www.odbm.org/

Guest Bio: Chelsea Damon is the author of I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: How to Fight Less, Forgive Faster, and Cultivate Joy in Your Marriage and Together with Christ, A Dating Couple's Devotional: 52 Devotions and Bible Studies to Nurture Your Relationship. She is also the author of chelseadamon.com, a website where moms and wives are encouraged to cultivate healthy, Christ-centered lives and relationships. Damon and her husband Josh met while attending college, where they grew in their faith and dated for three years. They were married on the windy coast of Washington in 2013. Throughout their dating and marriage relationship and into parenthood, they've been learning what it means to live loving God and others in a self-love world. Today, the Damons have three biological children, are foster parents, and spend their time looking for new places to hike and explore beautiful South Carolina.     Show Summary: Did you think marriage or a specific relationship would fix all your problems and fully heal you? While marriage is a beautiful gift from God, it can also be really hard. Some seasons are filled with joy and excitement while others are filled with anger and arguments. Chelsea Damon realized she was expecting that marriage would make her happy and storing up resentment towards her husband during the first few years of their marriage. Join hosts Elisa Morgan and Eryn Eddy Adkins as they learn how Chelsea overcame her resentment and began to apply grace to her marriage with the help of God. You don't want to miss this God Hears Her conversation.     Notes and Quotes:   “I like to use a little assessment of whether something is starting to be an idol in our lives is, ‘Would I lose my self of identity if [this thing] was taken away? Or would I lose my hope and my future if that was taken away?'” —Chelsea Damon  “[When dealing with disillusionment], I really had to fall back on my relationship with Christ, and in doing so, He really taught me that through fire He really is the only thing that is going to truly fulfill me.” —Chelsea Damon  “One of the great dichotomies in the Christian faith is that when you surrender control, you gain so much more.” —Chelsea Damon  “. . . we're doing the work and we're ready to be receptive to God's Word and what He has to say to us. And that's the only place where what He plants can grow deep roots and get a foothold in our lives to bear fruit.” —Chelsea Damon    Verses:   The Parable of the Sower: Matthew 13:1-23    Links:   Chelsea's Book, I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: https://www.amazon.com/Thought-This-Would-Make-Happy/dp/0310367778  Chelsea's Website: https://chelseadamon.com/  Chelsea's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chelsealeighdamon/  God Hears Her website: https://godhearsher.org/  Watch the Video Podcast Here: https://www.youtube.com/@GodHearsHerODBM  God Hears Her email sign-up: https://www.godhearsher.org/sign-upsfmc   Subscribe on iTunes! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/god-hears-her-podcast/id1511046507?utm_source=applemusic&utm_medium=godhearsher&utm_campaign=podcast  Elisa's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elisamorganauthor/  Eryn's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/eryneddy/  Vivian's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vivmabuni/  Our Daily Bread Ministries website: https://www.odbm.org/

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Gabrielle & Scott talk with Dr. Juli Slattery from Authentic Intimacy about how past sexual abuse impacts individuals and their marriages. With biblical truth, personal insight, and expert care, Dr. Slattery shares how healing can happen in safe relationships marked by trust, patience, and grace. We hope this episode provides hope and healing for those affected by sexual abuse. Scriptures Referenced (in context):Rom 12:15John 10:10PS 34:18Rom 8:28 Resources:Juli's Ministry – Authentic IntimacyJuli's Podcast – Java with JuliBooks: Surprised by the Healer, by Linda Dillow and Juli Slattery; God, Sex, and Your Marriage, by Juli Slattery Questions to Discuss:1. What stood out to you most from this conversation with Dr. Juli Slattery?2. What does it look like to be a “safe place” for your spouse?3. How can we invite—not demand—intimacy in our marriage?4. Are there past wounds (sexual or otherwise) we need to process personally or as a couple?5. Who are safe people or resources we could pursue if we need help?

Feel Unappreciated in Your Marriage? Here's How to Fix It Do you feel like your efforts go unnoticed or unreciprocated in your marriage? In this episode of Reconciling Marriages with Coach Jack, you'll learn how to break free from the resentment that can build when you feel used or emotionally neglected. What You'll Learn:Why over-giving leads to resentment—and how to fix it without harming your connectionHow to communicate your needs clearly without sounding critical or demandingWhat to do if your love languages don't match—and how to get more of what you wantHow to make small changes that spark big improvements, even without your spouse's cooperationWant to Work With Coach Jack? If you're feeling unseen, used, or disconnected—and you're ready to feel loved again—check out the Re-Connections Coaching Package. It's designed to help you rebuild attraction, trust, and appreciation even when your spouse isn't working on the relationship.Key Takeaways:Feelings like resentment and burnout are early warning signs—not signals to give upDoing more doesn't help if you're doing the wrong things for your spouseMotivation works better than confrontation when love languages don't alignCommunication must be kind, specific, and direct to be effectiveYou can take steps today that improve connection without waiting on your spouseAdditional Resources:Book: The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. Recommended reading.Re-Connections Coaching Package--for help with ending the resentment cycle and restoring a relationship with a spouse who will not work with you.Would you like matching YouTube description elements (timestamps, thumbnail prompt, tags) prepared as well?Work one-on-one with Coach Jack to repair your relationship using small, easy steps that rebuild connection quickly. Visit CoachJackIto.com to learn more about relationship coaching.

In this heartfelt and honest conversation, Dr. Kim sits down with Jimmy Rollins to unpack the real-life highs and lows of marriage. They dive into why communication, forgiveness, and a strong support system are so crucial—and how those things have played out in their own lives. From the power of simple daily appreciations to creating a safe space for open conversations, Jimmy and Dr. Kim get real about what it takes to build (and rebuild) a strong relationship. They also reflect on how easy it is to chase success in the wrong places—and how to shift the focus back to what matters most. Whether you're in a great season or struggling to find your footing, this episode is full of practical wisdom and encouragement to help you grow and heal in your marriage. Episode Takeaways: Every marriage is hard and requires effort. Forgiveness is a decision, while reconciliation is a process. Daily appreciation can reignite connection in marriage. Creating a safe space is essential for open communication. Winning at the wrong things can harm your marriage. Community support is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. It's important to examine your own behavior in marriage. Practical steps can lead to significant changes in relationships. Couples should seek resources and mentorship for guidance. The goal in marriage is to think together, not alike.   Questions to Discuss:  Are there areas of your marriage you are trying to ignore? Are there areas you are trying to change your spouse? How would you rate the community you have to support your marriage? What one thing can you say “no” to today, so that you have more margin to say “yes”  in your marriage.    Quotes: "Forgiveness is a decision." "Community is what keeps us sober." "You're not in it by yourself." "Every marriage is hard." "The goal is not to think alike." "The best days are ahead of us."   MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:   Use our FREE Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide to keep intentionally winning in your marriage! Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word as you prioritize your marriage. Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Traffic Signs and Your Marriage: Part 1 If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com !  Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips! Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In this heartfelt and honest conversation, Dr. Kim sits down with Jimmy Rollins to unpack the real-life highs and lows of marriage. They dive into why communication, forgiveness, and a strong support system are so crucial—and how those things have played out in their own lives. From the power of simple daily appreciations to creating a safe space for open conversations, Jimmy and Dr. Kim get real about what it takes to build (and rebuild) a strong relationship. They also reflect on how easy it is to chase success in the wrong places—and how to shift the focus back to what matters most. Whether you're in a great season or struggling to find your footing, this episode is full of practical wisdom and encouragement to help you grow and heal in your marriage. Episode Takeaways: Every marriage is hard and requires effort. Forgiveness is a decision, while reconciliation is a process. Daily appreciation can reignite connection in marriage. Creating a safe space is essential for open communication. Winning at the wrong things can harm your marriage. Community support is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. It's important to examine your own behavior in marriage. Practical steps can lead to significant changes in relationships. Couples should seek resources and mentorship for guidance. The goal in marriage is to think together, not alike.   Questions to Discuss:  Are there areas of your marriage you are trying to ignore? Are there areas you are trying to change your spouse? How would you rate the community you have to support your marriage? What one thing can you say “no” to today, so that you have more margin to say “yes”  in your marriage.    Quotes: "Forgiveness is a decision." "Community is what keeps us sober." "You're not in it by yourself." "Every marriage is hard." "The goal is not to think alike." "The best days are ahead of us."   MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:   Use our FREE Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide to keep intentionally winning in your marriage! Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word as you prioritize your marriage. Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Traffic Signs and Your Marriage: Part 1 If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com !  Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips! Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In many marriages, there's a quiet, often invisible dynamic that keeps one person shrinking and the other wondering why they feel so alone — even when both partners care deeply.It's called the “one down” position.And it's more common than you might think.Sometimes it looks like always apologizing…Or saying, “You deserve better than me.”Or hiding behind a wall of withdrawal and silence.But underneath, it's all rooted in shame — a belief that “I'm not enough,” or “I don't belong in this relationship as I am.”In this week's episode of AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I'm diving deep into this dynamic:

While serving your spouse is a wonderful thing, it can only go so far. The truth is that some things will only change in your marriage when you give them to God in prayer. Ryan and Selena Frederick are on a mission to inspire couples to pray for each other for 40 days, with the goal to make it a regular habit in their relationship. They’ll address why praying Scripture is so effective, how prayer can reset your heart when you’re upset with your mate, and ways that prayer makes you a more unified couple. Receive the 40 Prayers for My Spouse bundle and the audio download of the broadcast "Making Prayer a Priority in Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Plus, receive member-exclusive benefits when you make a recurring gift today. Your monthly support helps families thrive. Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

In the episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss our tendency and desire to win and be right in marriage, when the goal is to “lose”, become more like Jesus, pursue oneness, and walk in humility. Scriptures:Gen 2:18-25John 10:10Phil 2:3-41 Tim 1:151 Cor 13:6 Resources:Removed Series from Harris CreekWatermark Marriage Conference – Lance Sisco - Keeping Score in Your MarriageBook – The Meaning of Marriage, by Timothy & Kathy KellerMore Than Roommates Episode 94 – How to Be a Better Listener in MarriageQuestions to Discuss:1. Who has the harder time saying “You're right” in your relationship?2. Why is hard to say to your spouse, “You are right”?3. How can you pursue a team mentality instead of fighting to be right?

 Why Trying to Fix Your Marriage Might Be Making Things WorseWelcome to Reconciling Marriages with Coach Jack, the podcast where Christian psychologist and relationship coach Dr. Jack Ito shares powerful, skill-based strategies to rebuild connection and emotional closeness in your marriage. In this episode, Coach Jack reveals why trying to fix your marriage often leads to more emotional distance—and what to do instead if you want your spouse to enjoy being with you again.What You'll LearnWhy fixing emotional problems with practical solutions pushes your spouse awayThe difference between understanding and validation—and why it mattersFive specific validation behaviors that rebuild emotional connectionWhat not to say when your spouse wants space, distance, or separationA real-life client example of transformation through non-fixing behaviorsWant to Work With Coach Jack? If you're tired of being pushed away despite your efforts to repair your relationship, it's time for a better strategy. My Re-Connections Coaching Package is designed to help you reconnect with your spouse through validation, empathy, and skillful communication—even if your spouse is distancing or asking for separation.Key TakeawaysFixing emotional distance with practical solutions creates more disconnectionValidation requires agreement, empathy, compliments, appreciation, or admirationAvoid apologies, explanations, or promises when trying to rebuild closenessEmotional connection grows through similarity—not fixing, reasoning, or negotiatingSmall steps done consistently have more power than big emotional appealsAdditional ResourcesDoes Giving Space or Going No-Contact Help to Reconcile?Is There Hope for Your Marriage? Yes, Here's Why.Q&A About How to Reconcile after a Marital Separation.Now through Easter Monday receive 10% a coaching package or consultation with code EASTER10Work one-on-one with Coach Jack to repair your relationship using small, easy steps that rebuild connection quickly. Visit CoachJackIto.com to learn more about relationship coaching.

Special Patreon Re-Release: Love and Loss with James Jetton   James 1:2-4 (NIV) "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."   **Transcription Below**   James Jetton's Bio: My name is James Jetton. I have and still do live a crazy beautiful, challenging, and blessed life. I am blessed to get to raise 4 beautiful children, and I have spent time getting to serve a fantastic community as a Recreation Minister, where I got to combine my love of Jesus, sports, and people. I served in this role for 13 years before my bride Kaetlin was diagnosed with Leukemia in 2020. Unfortunately, after an awe-inspiring journey with cancer, Kaetlin went to meet her Savior in January of 2022.   Clearly, this changed so much of my life trajectory. Currently, I'm working towards obtaining a Masters in Social Work to take the pain and experiences I have had to help others through their pain. Kaet and I were married in 2009 and built a beautiful life; we taught each other so much. So, I deeply desire to take everything we learned together and the lessons the Lord has taught me to help others.   I mentioned earlier that I have 4 exceptional children, Laken, 9, Isla Kaet, 7, Hattie, 6, and Ryder, 4. Laken is my go-getter; she is fearless, strong, and tough. Sweet Isla Kaet is a quiet thinker and planner and is often referred to as little Kaet. She cares deeply and is always looking for ways where she can help and take care of her family. Hattie is our child with special needs and has been diagnosed with GNB-1 Syndrome (a rare genetic disorder). Hattie will light up any room she is in; it's incredible that a child who only has a few words, uses a wheelchair, and is “limited” by our world's standards, can bring joy to people in a way that I never knew was possible. Ryder the caboose is a maniac, and his sisters affectionately call him “Wreck it Ryder” he has no fear and is a super extrovert; he keeps us all on our toes. He is what some would say, “all boy.”   This is a brief bio of me and our circus; through everything, we have found joy in all circumstances. Although there are exceptionally hard days as we have endured much grief, God has always provided, and I am thankful for the life God has given us.   Questions we discuss: Life took an unexpected twist in 2016. Will you catch us up on your discoveries that year? While many of us were in the midst of changing schedules and suddenly homeschooling children in May of 2020, your family was receiving even more news. Will you share that with us now? What is life like for your family these days, as grief likely comes at unexpected times?   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Other Episodes from The Savvy Sauce of God's Faithfulness: 17 Being on Both Sides of Forgiveness with Adelle Dickie 18 Clinging to Jesus as I lived Through My Worst Nightmare with Angela Braker 19 Grief and Triumph and God's Pursuit Though it All with Julie Locke Moore 20 Joy in the Lord Even Through Tremendous Loss…Twice with Rachel Faulkner Brown 62 Unexpected Grief and What Helped Me Through It Can Help You Too with Singer and Blogger, Brittany Price Brooker 78 Parenting the Prodigal Child And God's Desire For Redemption With Mother-Daughter Duo, Claire Stanfill and Tindell Baldwin 79 Radical Business and Radical Parenting with Gary & Marla Ringger, Founders of Lifesong for Orphans 83 Miracles of God with Founder of Midwest Food Bank, David Kieser 120 Our Story for His Glory with Mercedes Cotchery 134 Fashion Meets Faith with Shari Braendel 141 Rescued from Poverty with Norah Birungi 143 Prodigal Story: Sexuality, Drugs, and Scripture with Dr. Christopher Yuan 160 Unleash This Generation with the Power of the Gospel with Greg Stier 161 God Redeems with Hettie Brittz 162 Healing from Spouse's Sexual Addiction with Jennifer Roush 174 Stories of God's Upside Down Economy with Kristen Welch 208 Tremendous Testimony and Adding Spark into Your Marriage with David & Teri Sumlin 223 Journey and Learnings as Former Second Lady of the United States with Karen Pence 229 Escape from Modern Day Sex Slavery with Rachel Timothy Special Patreon 28 Re-Release: What to Do When You Don't Like Your Story with Sharon Jaynes 231 Stories Series: Faith Building Miracles with Dave Pridemore 232 Stories Series: Testify to Glorify with Richard Gamble 233 Stories Series: Surprises from God with Tiffany Noel Special Patreon Re-Release: Patreon 30 Story of Perseverance with Jenny Boyett 234 Stories Series: Redemption From Sexual Sin in Marriage with Garrett and Brenna Naufel 235 Stories Series: Ever-Present Help in Trouble with Kent Heimer 236 Stories Series: God's Power and Light with Jaime Farrell 237 Stories Series: Prodigal and Redemption with Renee Endress Special Patreon Re-Release: Patreon 31 Unexpected Story of Trauma, Anxiety, Adoption, and Hope with Bettina Stevens 238 Stories Series: God Delights in His Children with Brad Habegger 239 Stories Series: Experiencing the Supernatural with Jackie Coleman 240 Stories Series: God's Rescue and Covering in Parenting with Brenda Dugger 241 Stories Series: From the Mission Field, Experiencing God in the Little and the Big with Patty Sommer 242 Stories Series: He Gives and Takes Away with Joyce Hodel 243 Stories Series: Angel Encounter and Hearing from God with Mary Beth Zimmerman 244 Stories Series: Medical Marvels with Carolyn Henricks 245 Stories Series: Miracles Big and Small with Dr. Rob Rienow 246 Stories Series: Experiencing God's Tangible Love with Jen Moore 247 Stories Series: Exciting Adventures Follow Radical Obedience with Susan Zobrist 248 Stories Series: Discipline of Celebration in the Midst of Unexpected Loss and Grief with Jonathan Pitts Special Patreon Re-Release: Patreon 49: Story of Healing from Sexual Betrayal in Marriage: An Interview with Bonny Burns 249 Stories Series Conclusion: Now What? Living as Global Christians with Todd Ahrend of The Traveling Team   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   **Transcription**   Music: (0:00 – 0:09)   Laura Dugger: (0:09 - 2:07) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. I'm grateful for today's sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria.   Check them out online to place your order for dining or catering, or to fill out an application to join their friendly team. Visit cfaeastpeoria.com. If you've been with us long, you know this podcast is only one piece of our nonprofit, which is The Savvy Sauce Charities.   Don't miss out on our other resources. We have questions and content to inspire you to have your own practical chats for intentional living. And I also hope you don't miss out on the opportunity to financially support us through your tax-deductible donations.   All this information can be found on our recently updated website, thesavvysauce.com. And now, I'm pleased to share this episode with you that used to only be available to paying patrons.    My guest for today is James Jetton.   Mark and I attended the same family camp as James in 2022. I observed a father who was very devoted to his children, and one of his precious daughters was in a wheelchair, which was always by his side. He was so tender with his children, and I just assumed his wife was resting while he was attending to the family.   I did not learn of his full story until after camp, and it was through a mutual friend, April Siervo. But then, after she shared a bit more of their story, I immediately reached out to James to request that he share his faith and testimony with us today. Here's our chat.   Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, James.   James Jetton: (2:07 - 2:15) I'm happy to be here. I'm looking forward to talking to you and just kind of sharing how God has moved in our lives the past few years.   Laura Dugger: (2:15 - 2:24) You have already lived through so much, but let's just start here. When did Jesus initially draw you to himself?   James Jetton: (2:26 - 3:25) Yeah, I think that's like, you know, it's a big question, right? But also, it shouldn't be. I think the first time I really just kind of came to know the Lord, I was in the eighth grade.   I had a retreat, and in that moment, for me, it was a situation of— it wasn't necessarily for me, but also just trying to do the right thing. I grew up in Birmingham, Alabama, so I was in the Bible Belt. I was like, this is what we're supposed to do.   We're supposed to give our lives to Jesus. But I would say probably going into my senior year of high school, I had some moments just kind of alone at a beach, actually. I was like, what am I doing with my life?   And I believe that that was kind of the first one real moment in my life where I decided, I think I'm going to actually follow the Lord now and not just do this, just to say I'm doing it. And so that was really the first time I really felt the Lord draw me to him. And then, of course, as time goes on, there's all these other little moments throughout where he's continually staying close and bringing me back to him when I feel like I'm drifting away and that sort of thing.   Laura Dugger: (3:27 - 3:39) Thank you for sharing that. And you've written before on your blog that, I'll quote, one of the best decisions I have ever made was when I persuaded Kaetlin to marry me, end quote.   James Jetton: (3:39 - 3:40) Yeah.   Laura Dugger: (3:40 - 3:43) James, how did the two of you meet and fall in love?   James Jetton: (3:44 - 5:30) Yeah, so we went to college together. We went to Troy University. I vividly remember a time where she was getting out of her car, and she didn't know me at this time.   But I remember seeing her. I think I met her maybe once or twice through some mutual friends. I remember seeing her get out of the car and literally, I'll never forget this moment.   I was like, man, if I could just have a girl like that. And it stuck with me. And I think the first time we met, I think I made some comments that she wasn't happy about, about some fraternity guys that were in a different fraternity than me that I didn't think too highly of.   But I didn't realize in that moment that she was actually the sweetheart of that fraternity. And so, we kind of got off to a little bad step there. But I remember she broke up with another boyfriend.   That was part of the reason I saw her. And I was like, I could never have a girl like that. All the girls like that are taken.   And so, she broke up with her boyfriend. I remember her best friend called me and was like, “Hey, can I bring her over to y'all's house? Because she just needs to laugh”.   I was like, “Well, we can do that. We can make sure she laughs”. And so, I think from there, we just kind of, I don't know, just we continued to talk.   And for some reason, she liked me a little bit and I liked her a whole lot. And we dated for about three years in college. And when we got out of college, we got married in May of 2009.   And so that was kind of where life began to speed up a lot at that point. But that was the first time I'll never forget those moments. And then there's other things throughout.   But I remember seeing her in the parking lot like that girl.   Laura Dugger: (5:31 - 5:43) So, I love that. And OK, so married in 2009 and then children came a little while later. So how many children did you add to your family?   James Jetton: (5:44 - 6:28) Yeah, we have four kids. Our first child was born in 2013. So, after we got married, we lived back here in Niceville for a little bit but then ended up moving.   She wanted to go to PA school, and I was working a job I didn't care too much for. So, I was like, how quickly can we go to school? And so, we moved to West Tennessee where she went to PA school.   And I ended up going to school there, too, because she studied all the time, and I was bored. And I was like, I guess I should do something productive as well. So that was 2009 and we had a lot of fun.   We love to travel, did a lot of fun things. And then in 2013, we had our first child, Laken.   Laura Dugger: (6:28 - 6:39) And then if you fast forward, life took an unexpected twist in 2016. So, will you catch us up on your discoveries that year?   James Jetton: (6:40 - 13:07) Yeah. So, we, you know, so we had Laken in 2013. Then, we had another part of our - we did have a miscarriage between Laken and Isla who was born in 2015. But then we had Hattie who was born in 2016.   And Hattie's our child with special needs. And she was born in - all of our pregnancies where we used to joke with people that could have babies and just bounce right back and have these beautiful, wonderful pregnancies. And they loved it.   That was not us. Every single one of our pregnancies brought some challenge within it. And so with Hattie, my wife started swelling a lot and kind of found out she had some clotting in her legs.   And so, we ended up having to induce labor for her with that happening. And, you know, when she my wife was also a PA in the ER. So, she understood medical things way better than I did.   I was kind of oblivious to a lot of things. So, she would probably say it was a little bit more scary than I realized it was when she was giving birth. But when Hattie came, like in some accounts, it just kind of seemed normal.   But she was having some trouble breathing. And so, she was in our hospital. In order to go to the NICU, you have to kind of get transferred out to a smaller hospital.   And so, they were keeping her under observation that night. And her breathing wasn't really getting a whole lot better. And they did x-rays and stuff like that, but couldn't really find much.   And then there was a morning where we were about ready to load up and send her to the NICU. And Kaetlin went and held her. And when she went and held her, she started breathing better.   And she calmed down. And it was kind of crazy. It was genuinely like the love of a mother.   Just like this connection seemed to just calm Hattie down. But we ended up finding out later, one of the nurses was amazing. And was like, I think that she has a broken collarbone.   They didn't see it on the x-ray at first because of the way her chin was turned. And so, when they went back and looked, they did another one. And sure enough, she did have a broken collarbone.   So, at the time, we kind of thought that was kind of the reason for her distressed breathing and that sort of thing. And she had trouble latching and sucking. And what we kind of came to find out later is she had what would be called hypotonia.   Which is basically where the best way to describe it in layman's terms is like a floppy baby. Like you hold her up and everything just kind of flops. And I remember Kaitlyn going to her four-month appointment.   And her being very concerned like, “Hey, Hattie's not meeting milestones. And I think that this isn't going to be a good appointment”. And sure enough, the doctor agreed.   We've always had amazing doctors around us. And so, he agreed. And so, we got referred to neurology.   And another just cool story about how God just provides. One of my best friends growing up, his dad was a neurologist in Birmingham. And so, I called him.   And he's like, all right, I got it. You're going to be here next Thursday. I'm like, oh, okay.   When we were kind of told like it's going to be like three or four months before we can even get you into a neurologist. And so, like God just kind of provided that. And we started that journey of trying to figure out what's going on.   And anyone who's ever had a special needs child, especially when you don't know what it is. Because there was nothing we could have done to foresee this happening. What Hattie had was called DeNovo, like just completely her.   Didn't come from me. Didn't come from Kaylin. And there's no other kids with special needs in our family.   It was just something we couldn't have expected or planned or could have even seen or anything like that. And so just kind of going through a lot of different doctors and tests and eventually getting referred to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore. Because at the time they thought it might be a neuromuscular thing.   And so, from there, they're like, oh, we don't think that's what it is. But then we ran a whole bunch of genetic panels. And like you're just going through all of that.   It definitely there's waves, right? Like it's like you want an answer, but at some level you're afraid of the answer. So, like each time we would do testing stuff before nothing would ever come back.   And so, it was like a relief. Okay, well, good. It's not that one.   Okay. Not that one. But then you're still like, well, what is it?   And so, after we went to Baltimore, they did much more extensive genetic testing. We found out she had this genetic disorder, or syndrome is what they're calling it now called GNV1. And it's crazy rare.   Like at the time, there were only 64 known cases. It was discovered in 2016. So, there's chances that there's other kids out there with it.   I think now there's a little over 100 that they know of. We're part of like a Facebook group where there's some of them in there. And so that's what we got the diagnosis for Hattie.   And so, what that means, I guess, probably no one knows what GNV1 is. Not even doctors. We go to doctors like, oh, can you tell us what this is?   We'll do our best. But it just starts out as hypotonia and global delay, which means every aspect of her is delayed from speech to gross and fine motor movements and all that kind of stuff. And also like with kids with special needs, it doesn't seem to affect any one of them the exact same way.   And so, but the thing about Hattie is like she has an infectious smile. She has this joy that is unreal. Like anybody that meets her just can't get enough of her.   And that is true in so many ways. Hattie uses a wheelchair to get around and Hattie's expressive language. So, her ways to communicate is behind.   But she understands everything. I mean, everything, which is pretty amazing, is my understanding. Not all the kids have that ability to receive and understand things as well as she does.   But she is an absolute joy. We used to always say and still do that Hattie's going to change the world. And we know the fact she's changed my world for sure.   And we know she's changed many others. But yeah, I could keep going on and on. But where we are today, like genuinely that she is a purpose and a reason why I've got to get up every single day.   Yeah. So, she's pretty amazing. Like I'm just yeah, I could go on and on about her.   Laura Dugger: (13:08 - 18:15) I think you described her so well with an infectious smile and joy is the word that comes to mind when you see her. Yeah. And now a brief message from our sponsors.   I want to say thank you to our longtime sponsor Chick-fil-A East Peoria. I hope that you've already downloaded the Chick-fil-A app. Because did you know that with the app you can skip the line and have food ready for you when you arrive?   This is one of my favorite options when I'm taking my four daughters to Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Download the Chick-fil-A app today and start earning points toward free rewards that are fully customized to your preferences and tastes. Chick-fil-A was named as one of Glassdoor's best places to work in the nation.   That's a huge honor. And one team member even wrote, no comparison. This is a great job for a first job, extra money or for career advancement.   Such a loving environment, great management and fair pay. Chick-fil-A believes that the local and involved ownership ensures fostering an environment where you are known, challenged and cared for. So, if you're looking for a wonderful place to work, visit Chick-fil-A East Peoria or fill out an application online today at cfaeastpeoria.com.   Are you utilizing Savvy Sauce Charities to full capacity? Other than our special Patreon re-release episodes, our content is now available in video form in addition to our audio only. And we have written transcriptions for every episode.   Visit our website today, thesavvysauce.com, to access all these forms of interviews. And while you're there, make sure you sign up for our email list to receive encouragement, questions and recommended resources about once a month to promote your own practical chats for intentional living. 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Another way to find it is simply type in donate to the search bar on our website and just click the first picture shown. We are all about sharing around here, sharing resources, sharing joy, and sharing the good news about Jesus Christ.   We ask that you also will share by sharing financially, sharing The Savvy Sauce podcast episodes, and sharing a five-star rating and review. You can also share any of our social media posts on Instagram or Facebook. We are grateful for all of it, and we just love partnering together with you. Now, back to the show.    In a different season, when many of us were in the midst of changing schedules and suddenly homeschooling our children in May of 2020, your family was receiving even more news. So, will you share that with us now as well?   James Jetton: (18:16 - 22:36) Yeah. We did have our fourth kid, Ryder. He was born in 2018, and he is a wild man.   My wife and I used to always say, or people would tell us, you'll know when you're done. But we had him, and we were like, okay, we're broke. We're done.   No more. But he's awesome. But yeah, the move forward to then, you know, that COVID stuff was really hard.   It was really hard. I was working for a church, and I do sports and rec ministry, and also I was doing student ministry at the time. And so, for me personally, like, things just kind of got shut down.   No one was doing sports leagues, and student ministry looked weirder than ever. And then my wife, she was working in the emergency room as a PA, and so she was facing everything head on. And so, I guess that kind of started in March.   It's funny, just to kind of back up a little bit. We felt prior to that, probably February or March of that 2020, when things were kind of like exploding, we just felt the Lord doing something in our lives. We felt like He was preparing us for something.   We felt like it was going to be something just amazing. But then as we moved forward to try to understand what God is doing, what He was telling us, in May, my 4-year-old, she had her preschool graduation. And I'll never forget this day.   My wife was a go-getter. She's tough. She's strong.   And we had a super weird COVID graduation for Isla, my 4-year-old. And it was weird because it was a drive-through graduation, so we had to get up there early and go do it. So, my wife also, she would do work night shifts so that she could be home with the kids when I couldn't be there.   And so, it wasn't uncommon for her to have to sleep in some. But this was like she hadn't worked the night before, and she hadn't worked. And so, we'd been off for two days, but she was just so exhausted.   She had this terrible headache that morning. And for her to say, like, I can't go to the graduation, that was like, there's something significant here. And I told her, like, she had gone to the doctor about a week before and got on some antibiotics, but it wasn't doing anything.   And I was just like, hey, I think it's time to go back to the doctor because you're not any better. And I've got to take these kids to this graduation. So, I loaded up all the kids.   We went to the drive-through graduation. While I was there, she called and said that her sister was going to take her to the emergency room. So that was a long day.   At that time, COVID was full on, so she couldn't have visitors. No one could come in with her. She had to be dropped off and go inside.   One huge plus in that for our specific situation is that she was taken to her own emergency room. So, she still had her friends and what she would call family there as well. And so, she dropped her off.   My sister-in-law dropped her off and just kind of waited in the parking lot until we figured out what was going on. So, it kind of went throughout that whole day. And I remember that night, the school was doing another virtual graduation where they showed pictures and that sort of thing.   And she texted me and said, I need to talk to you now. I was like, okay, like right now? Because I'm home alone with all four of the kids.   She's like, yeah, and I need you to get away from the kids. I was like, this doesn't sound good. What could this be?   And so, we FaceTimed, and that's where she told me they think I have leukemia. And so then as things started speeding up, we sent out a message to our church asking for prayers. From there, I put the kids to bed.   I drove to Pensacola. She got transferred to Pensacola, and we started treatment there for leukemia. So that was what happened.   That was the big moment in May. And then from there, there's a whole lot more. And so, I'll share as you wish.   Laura Dugger: (22:37 - 22:54) Wow. Thank you for catching us up to that point, James. I can't even imagine the initial devastation that comes.   And as your journey unfolds, I remember seeing a post about leaving your light on.   James Jetton: (22:54 - 24:24) Yeah. Like I said earlier, my wife always did the night shift. And so, I always left the light on for her when she was at work and then turned it off when she came home.   And so, yeah, so early on, I said that I'm not turning the light off until you come home. And so, during that time, the first treatment, it doesn't seem like a lot now because she was in the hospital so much. We didn't know how long she'd be in there.   But the first initial treatment, they're like, you're going to be in for three weeks. And so, I knew that she wouldn't be home for three weeks. And I guess this is me just kind of realizing that was a long time for the kids.   I remember talking to a friend of mine who was leading a small group of high school boys. And I remember him telling them, like, how hard do you think it would be if your mom was gone for three weeks? I was like, yeah, it's not easy.   But so. So, yeah, so that was that was the reason. Just like my wife, one, she was a light in the midst of all the darkness that she was having to face.   And I just wanted to make a point that like, hey, we're leaving this light on for you until you come home. And in a lot of respects, you know, she did go home. Long, long story.   But, yeah, that that was the reason for the light.   Laura Dugger: (24:25 - 24:34) So, well, and the way that you describe her, it sounds like our mutual friend April said her joy was just out of this world.   James Jetton: (24:34 - 24:36) Yeah, that's true.   Laura Dugger: (24:36 - 24:49) It sounds like maybe the both of you share that, but you were not entering into a joyful season. So, what did the next few months and year even look like?   James Jetton: (24:49 - 30:47) Yeah. So initially, when things went down, my wife and I agreed that we would not let our kids lose both their parents. And so, I tried to make it a point to be home at night.   So, when we were in Pensacola, like I would stay with her some nights, but I would also be home at night to put the kids to bed or I would put the kids to bed and I'd drive over that night and come back in the morning or be with her during the day. Like, you know, it was just crazy stuff. One, you know, it happened at the end of the school year.   So, we have all the kids at home. We didn't get to send them off to school. We were blessed to have an amazing college student.   It was one of Kaetlin's girls that she got to mentor when she was in high school. She was an amazing girl. She decided she would be like our nanny that summer.   And so, she was with our kids all day, every day. So, I could go and be with Kaetlin during the day and come home at night. And so, we went through that.   We were here and we did the treatment in Pensacola. It didn't work. And so, the next step at that point was like, well, what are we doing now?   And on a Thursday, the doctor was like, I think we need to go to MD Anderson. We'll see if there's a spot. And then on a Friday, they had a spot.   And then on Monday, we were in Houston at MD Anderson. I went to MD Anderson with her. You know, COVID protocol there still.   I could only be with her for 14 days and inpatient. And then I had to leave as an inpatient. So, I can only go with her for 14 days in that initial time.   And so, we went there. She started a treatment plan. We found an apartment.   And then I left. And then her dad came. And her dad was huge in a lot of this stuff and was able to allow us to do things like me and be with the kids.   And so, I think I stayed there for 10 days. And then he came over to stay with Kaetlin to take her back and forth to the hospital, just receiving treatment. And then I came home, and I came back to Niceville.   And that was during the summer. July, we were at home. We stayed in Niceville just kind of waiting to see, like, is Kaet going to be there longer?   Or is she going to be coming back here? And that was a wild summer. And this is what I think I would tell a lot of people that are going through hard things.   Like just because you're going through hard things doesn't mean there's other hard things. They're just a part of life. And, you know, when you have four kids, stuff happens.   You know, like we had one of my daughters, Isla, she had to have eye surgery that summer. While Kaet was in Houston. So that was an interesting thing.   My four-year-old son, he busted his head open on the back of a step going outside. So, he had to have some stitches in his head. He's the second that has had stitches in our family.   And he was the youngest. So, then the treatment, the goal was to get her to a place where she could do a bone marrow transplant. And so, we got, they got her to that point.   Her leukemia cell counts were low enough that we're ready to do a bone marrow transplant. And at that point, you know, we decided we're going to move to Houston. Everything was virtual at that time.   And I just couldn't see any reason why we couldn't all be together in Houston. And so, we found an apartment, we hunkered down. It's a two-bedroom apartment.   We built some makeshift bunk beds. And so, we moved there in August. And the community we have here was unreal.   The support that we have. Like I didn't, we didn't have to make a meal for, I felt like six months, I think. Like it was just crazy.   And people were allowing it and giving us money. So, we didn't have to worry about these kinds of things and what we're doing. And from moving packing boxes, like, I mean, I can't, it's just unfathomable.   All the different things that were put in place for us to do, to do what we did. And I don't think it would have happened without the community that came around us and our church here was great, but I've got to see The Big-C Church. And, and, and it was, it was amazing.   And so, we ended up, we all moved to Houston, and we lived in a two-bedroom apartment. Part of that story is like, you know, it's like, all right, we're doing this. And then talk about kids.   My four-year-old, the one that had also had the eye surgery, she had broken her ankle on a scooter. Like a week before we're going, it was like, are you kidding me? How is this happening right now?   But we had some great friends like, you know, when your wife is involved in the middle of the medical world, it makes access to doctors and stuff a lot easier when you're in a small town, like we are. So, they got it taken care of, got her in a cast. I was like, yeah, but we can't return with this hard cast.   We're going to Houston. He's like, all right, we'll get her in a hard cast. And we'll put her in a boot for the rest of the time.   So, we moved there. And you know, the dreams of like riding scooters around downtown Houston and doing all this kind of stuff kind of went away a little bit with the kid. And so, he, but there was a pool there.   So, we went swimming, she could swim. And so, we, we just made the best of what we had. Like we, we had a lot of good memories in that little apartment, even though it was, it was tough.   I remember, we, Halloween wasn't too long ago. We had our own little Halloween party in that apartment where we all dressed up, even Kaet. Cause she ended up getting her bone marrow transplant that time.   And another aspect of where dad was so important is when you get in the bone marrow transplant, you cannot leave, and you can have one guest. And so, her dad came and he stayed with her. It was about 30 days of bone marrow transplant.   And so, he was there with her so I could be with the kids, doing the best I can with that virtual school and, and managing Ryder and Hattie in the midst of trying to do school work with the kids. It's nothing I ever want to go back to.   Laura Dugger: (30:48 - 31:03) Well, and not to mention you appreciate The Big-C Church, but Houston was not your long-term community. So, being here in this new place and all of these transitions, what were the results of her bone marrow transplant?   James Jetton: (31:04 - 40:17) Yeah. So, the bone marrow transplant, it ended up working. She went into remission and so we get to come home Thanksgiving of 2020.   We came home and that was awesome. It was like a huge homecoming. Finally got back home.   She's, she's in remission. We felt like we'd beaten this. We, you know, we got that Christmas here and we were back home.   We even, our family always loves to go, has always gone to North Carolina for vacation every year. And we didn't get to do that. But so, it was like, now we're going.   And so, in January we're like, all right, we're going kids. It was just me and the kids and Kaet and we wanted to go see snow. So, we went up there and we found a place to stay.   It was an awesome trip. Loved it so much. We, when we had to check out of our place, we found another house so we could stay in for a few more days.   And so, you know, at that time though, when we were doing that, she was kind of having these red bumps kind of popping up over her. We didn't really know what it was. It could have been a reaction.   We couldn't figure it out. Saw some doctors here locally. No one could really figure out what it was.   And I think fast forward, what we found out probably, I think it was February. She came out of remission and that was kind of the beginning signs of her coming out of remission. And so that's where, life sped up.   Like, I mean, if it wasn't already fast, it was, it was just unreal. It was like a whirlwind like it was because she had to fly to Houston to go and see her doctors. And so, she was in Houston by herself when she found out that she had come out of remission, and they were going to start immediately.   So, she stays, and she flies over on Friday and on Monday they got her back doing her treatment. And so, and I was like, well, it looks like we're moving to Houston. And I was like, but this time we're not staying in a two-bedroom apartment.   It's like we're going to make this a little bit more manageable for us. So, we had some great family. Kaetlin actually had a cousin who lived in Houston.   We found a house inside their neighborhood that we could rent. And this was, you know, more, more provision that he just continued to show. We found this house in like a week and we had people from our community boxing up everything in our house.   He's gotten a truck, and we thought that we'd all get everything in one truck. But we didn't get everything in one truck. We'd even hired the movers to load up the truck.   They couldn't get it all in there. So, I was like, y'all told me that it would all fit on this truck, but now it's not. And it's Friday at like 5 p.m. when we were supposed to leave tonight. So, we're not leaving. But my brother came down. I had another one of my best friends come down and they were like, we got to go, we're going to make this happen.   So that next morning, I'm not kidding. When there was like 20 to 30 guys in my house, a brother had gotten the truck. I hadn't even, they left early to go with the truck.   I'd come. And I was at the house with the kids at a friend's house. And when me and the kids showed up, these 30 guys had already loaded up the truck and we were ready to go.   Guy came and dropped off a big spread of McDonald's for everybody. We prayed over us and we headed out that morning. And so, it was just, I mean, just crazy that, you know, in one week we packed up a four-bedroom house, loaded up two trucks and drove to Houston and we're now unloading at a new house in Houston.   And, and that's where we were for a while. That was where Kaetlin, then we went back into the treatment more aggressively trying to get her back to remission. And so that was, when we moved there in March of 2021.   And that was kind of our place for a while. We actually thought we'd be there for a real long time. Kids had started school there, trying our best to get connected community there, but it's difficult, especially when you've come from a place where you feel so connected and then you're moving somewhere new where you don't really know anybody.   And then you're moving there in a time where the whole town shut down. It was tough, but we got the kids back in school. We tried to start getting them back into normalcy of life.   And there's all these new trials when you're going through this stuff every day, it seems like there's a new trial. MD Anderson is amazing. They treat each patient. It's like an individual.   So, every plan they have is just specifically for that patient. And so, they were going to try to do this CAR T-cell treatment. So, we'd kind of gone through the whole summer, and then we get to the point where she's going to do her CAR T-cell treatment.   Now, you know, we, we were hunkered down with this COVID stuff. Like we didn't, we didn't do much. We got really good at DoorDash and grocery delivery.   And we, you know, we masked up everywhere we could because Kaetlin's system was so immuno-compromised and we had done what we had thought was a very good job of keeping her safe, keeping everyone safe. Well, and then she got to the point where she was ready to start this new trial with CAR T-cell treatment. And she gets admitted that night and every time they go in and they give her a COVID test, well, that night she had COVID.   And it was, it was like, what? And she didn't feel bad. Her dad had gotten it too.   Like we, and I, so I remember getting that, it was like one o'clock in the morning. I was asleep. I remember it like blowing up my phone.   And I was like, I didn't realize it until later. And I talked to her. And that was definitely a tough conversation because she had to like get moved, packed up and moved out and moved to a different place and then treatment for the COVID stuff.   But the crazy part was, and it was kind of, you know, I wanted to get frustrated about things I could, but like, she had zero symptoms and she had just tested positive. And so, the next morning we all had to go get tested. And it was just the weirdest thing.   I know that COVID has been so devastating to so many people. But in that moment for us, it was like, we don't like, I was like, I ran nine miles yesterday and now I'm positive for COVID. I don't.   And so, but what it did was it kicked her out of the trial that she was on. And so, then she had to come home. The next process was just kind of getting her ready for that same thing.   Basically, what her doctor did was like, I'm not taking out, you're going to get kicked off the trial, but I'm just going to make you my own individual patient. We're going to do it that way. And so, we had some, we had some pretty high hopes for this.   Doctor seemed pretty optimistic about this plan. And so, we had been renting our house in, in Niceville. And with this new plan, I would have had Kaetlin there for like three years.   And so, we were like, you know, do we really want to rent our house anymore? It's like, no, we don't. All right, well let's sell our house.   So, we sold our house, and it sold in like less than 24 hours. And it's like $25,000 over asking price. It was like, well, okay, God, I feel like that's what we're supposed to do.   And so, she went in to get that treatment. And, and, uh, unfortunately, uh, we found out that didn't work. Uh, it was like, well, she can't remember coming home and saying like, well, I'm ready.   I want to go back home. I was like, what? We just sold our house.   We don't have a home right now. But God always makes a way and you always provide always. Um, and so we, you know, I was like, all right, we want to go home.   We're going to go home. And at first I was being very logical. I was like, well, let's let the kids finish out the semester.   Cause this was like around Halloween is when she realized it didn't work and we're going to come home. So, we were able to come home. We had some amazingly generous friends who they got us a private flight to come home for that Halloween.   And I guess when we were there, um, that's where we really just decided we need to be back. And, and so she, when we went back to talk to her doctors about managing her leukemia remotely. And so that was what the plan was.   So we, we moved back that Thanksgiving, uh, with all of our stuff and we were looking for a place to stay. It was actually kind of a fun month. We were living on the beach for a couple months or really from Thanksgiving to right before Christmas.   We had some pretty awesome things come available. We were able to live in a house on the beach. And so that was, that was mine and my wife's always kind of like a special place.   And so, we love the water, and we love the beach. And so that was an awesome place for us to be. And so, uh, coming back, it was tough.   She was getting out of the hospital a lot just with fevers and stuff like that. And then we got to have Christmas here that December. And then January 9th of this past year, she, she, uh, eventually passed away.   We weren't expecting, I mean, we knew that there would be an end, but I don't think we could have expected it to, um, happen then. And I think we kind of thought we'd have a little bit more time, but we didn't, but we were thankful. I'm thankful for my wife.   It was like we got to get back now because we knew that when an issue did pass that we needed to be in our hometown and not in Houston, where our community was much smaller.   Laura Dugger: (40:18 - 40:27) So, yeah. And so, you're together, you're celebrating Christmas. And then things suddenly turned unexpectedly.   James Jetton: (40:28 - 40:28) Yeah.   Laura Dugger: (40:28 - 40:31) And that led to losing her on January 9th.   James Jetton: (40:32 - 44:59) Yeah. You know, nothing really happened like, you know, in that leukemia world. And you know, a lot of cancers that give you like, you know, a prognosis like, you have three months, you have four months full, but blood cancer is very different.   And it kind of exacts you and, and there's no way to really know for sure, like, is this going to work or how long do we have and that sort of thing. And she was just in and out of the hospital so much. When we came back home, when you have leukemia, anytime you have a fever above a hundred point four, it's like you're immediately going to the doctor.   And so that's kind of how, you know, when she went in, like, there's still kind of an expectation that she would come home. But then those last few days, like, I just, I vividly remember as we're trying to figure out what to do, we're going to, are we going to go to a new treatment plan or we're going to try something else? Or, or is this kind of the end?   And her doctor here, he said, there was a plan that we possibly could have done, but he was like, they're saying this got a success rate of like, whatever, nine of 10 people went into remission with it. He's like, but when you look closer, they were only in remission for four weeks. And he was like, is this what we want to do?   Cause chemo just, it wipes you out. And it's like, there's no way to continue to live like this. But she, Kaetlin, she was, she just had a way of bringing a peace over everybody.   She had a way of like knowing exactly what everyone needed, I guess, in some respects. Cause I remember leaving the day we decided we would not do the treatment plan. And I came home, like I said, I always try to be home to put my kids to bed.   She said that the night before it kind of, she went downhill fast. She got up and walked around the hospital with her dad and told her dad like, “Hey, I think I'm going to do, I think I'm going to do it. I'm going to do the treatment plan.”   You know, I've talked to him about this, but I feel like that was almost like the piece he needed to go home. You know, when she passed, it was like, it was beautiful. Like it was, it was such a blessing that she was in her home hospital and that the doors, it was like a revolving door.   I remember Kaetlin told me once, she said, “when I pass or when I'm in the last days, don't tell anyone that they can't come see me.” And so, we were trying to figure out how we're going to do this. And I was like, well, she said that anybody who wants to come see me, let them come see me.   And so, we put a word out and there was like a revolving door of people just coming in and out of the room all day. Like the doctors, the ER told the front desk people, like, you know, technically, I guess you're only supposed to have like two visitors or something because of the COVID things. And she was like, anybody that comes in and says they want to see Kaetlin Jetton, you say, “Go on up”.   So it was, it was pretty awesome seeing all these people come in and see her. And we had already gotten to see the impact that she had made on so many people's lives for the past couple of years, but it was cool to see them all there doing that. And I remember the night she passed, I leaned over, I was heading home and two of my best friends since the ninth grade had come down and they were at the house with the kids and I was coming home to put the kids to bed.   And I leaned over and gave her a kiss and I said, don't wait on me. It's like, it's okay. It's time to go home.   And sure enough, that's, I left that night and I got a phone call about 11 from her dad and she had passed and that, and I think that, you know, in some respects, it's like, should I have been there? I was like, but I think that also was like, no, Kaet wanted you to be with your two guys. And Kayla knew that her family would be there with her.   And she did exactly what she wanted to do. You know, she always had a plan even from her like celebration service. She had everything written out.   Who's going to speak, what songs are playing, when are we doing this? And so it was, it was, you know, it was pretty cool seeing how many people just came in and out and how she just kind of felt like she knew what she was doing, even up in the last days. So.   Laura Dugger: (45:00 - 45:55) Do you love The Savvy Sauce? Do you gain anything when you listen? Did you know that the two ways we earn money to keep this podcast live is through generous contributions from listeners and from our paying sponsors.   That means we can promote your business and you're still supporting The Savvy Sauce. It's a win-win. Please email us today at info@thesavvysauce.com to inquire about pricing for sponsoring each episode. Thank you for your consideration.    Well, James, your perspective is incredible. And yet I'm so sorry, such a deep loss for your whole family.   And what is life like now for all of your family these days? Cause it's still very recent. And I'm wondering if grief still comes up at unexpected times.   James Jetton: (45:56 - 50:49) Yeah. You know, it's, you know, it's a day-to-day thing, I believe. I don't, and grief is certainly something that sometimes you don't see it coming.   And I'll say, I love bragging on this community. I love bragging on this town so much. So, my kids, they're all in school, you know, and I'm bragging on my kids too.   After she passed, the kids got to stay home for a couple of weeks, but then it was time to go back to school. My two girls go to one school where actually Kaetlin went to school from kindergarten all through. So, I felt like that was a very special thing for her and the kids could go to the same school that their mom went to.   But then Hattie goes to a different school because of her special needs. And then Ryder goes to a different school. He's in preschool.   And so, after she passed, like, so it was complicated in the sense of, I've got to get Hattie to school at 7:30. I've got to get Lincoln out of school by like 8:45 and then Ryder can go in before 9:00 a.m. So, I would usually drop him off on the way. But I say, I'd say like, what does life look like?   Well, after she passed, I knew like, how am I going to make this work? And that semester, there was somebody in my house every morning at 7:00 a.m. to sit with the kids, help with breakfast, and help finish getting them ready while I could take Hattie to school at 7:30. And then I would come back home and after they finished getting ready, then I would take them to school. So, I had someone in my house every morning at 7:00 a.m. after she passed, which was, you know, they were doing it for the kids, but they were doing it for me too. I knew that I couldn't just lay in my bed and let people just come on in and take care of my kids. Like I had to get up, take a shower, look like I'm somewhat presentable and go on. And that's kind of how that last semester was, just community and people with meals and then through all that, trying to get them engaged, get them back into doing some things that they love to do.   And yeah, I like to brag on my kids in a lot of ways, this perspective kind of dawned on me in the past couple of weeks of like, I sent them back into a new school where they know very many people. Everybody knows them. Not everyone.   I don't know everybody. And they had to go and do that a few weeks after their mom passed. Here I am trying to stay away from people and not have a whole bunch of conversations, but yet the kids are stepping up and doing their thing.   And man, it's just, it's pretty inspiring when I think of it in that respect as well. Nowadays we are blessed that we get to have a nanny and it's, that's a whole cool story in itself. And that she worked with me in student ministry, and I'd actually left to go be a nanny for some other people in Nashville.   And I was texting her trying to figure out, “Hey, I need some help. You got any friends down here that want to be a nanny? Cause it's hard to find.”   And she's like, “Actually, I would love to come back and do it.” And that was just a huge blessing. Cause it was like, at the time of us having all these new things, I was able to be able to have somebody that the kids already knew come in and be there.   And so, she helps in so many ways and allows the kids to do their tennis and their soccer and gymnastics or whatever it may be. And it allows me to get to, coach them and be a part of that, those aspects of life, which I love doing so much. And so, she's really helped.   So, in our day to day now, like it, it's a lot of moving pieces. I mean, just last week, we got to go to a widower's retreat and there was never a worry, never worry about who's taking care of the kids, that they're getting to where they need to be. So, it's a genuine, like I get to see how a village truly takes care of the kids.   And yes, there are days and it's hard. And some days it just kind of sucks and it sucks for them. It sucks for me.   But I have gotten to see how God still shows out through the difficult moments and how he still provides no matter how far away I am or how close I am. He still continually provides. And I know that, and I know that he will not let us down.   It's one day at a time. And as we approach these new seasons, there's always new seasons. You talk about grief and things pop up.   I think that holidays will bring up stuff they already have in some respects and my wife, you know, she was a medical professional. So, when kids get sick, it's different now. We go to the doctor more often because mom's not here to take care of them and call in medicine.   But I think that we do sense a void in that when kids are sick and that sort of thing. But, today, like things are okay. We're doing all right.   Laura Dugger: (50:50 - 51:07) Well, and James, you were a journalism major and you're a very gifted writer. So where would you direct us to get to read more about your family and stay current and hopefully find ways that we can further support you?   James Jetton: (51:08 - 52:18) Well, my wife and I, we started a blog called Our Hands Go Up, and it's OurHandsGoUp.com. And that's formed out of, started with Hattie. That's where the blog started because Hattie, we talked about that joy that she has, but our hands will always go up.   Like her hands go up all the time and it just seems so appropriate. And the picture of hands going up, there's so many things that go to that with our praise to God, our vulnerability and our sides. And there's just a lot that comes through that anyway.   But yeah, Kaetlin started writing on that and I wrote some in that. She spearheaded it because she's way more organized and detailed than I am. So, it looks a lot prettier than what I would have done, but here recently, like I've felt a calling to bring it back and revitalize it.   So as of right now, like there's, my wife wrote a lot, and she still has writings that she never shared with anybody. So, I've started revitalizing it by sharing some of her writings, but I will be writing in there as well. So that would probably be a good place or even, and then my, just my social media, James Jetton, you can always see some crazy stories of my kids.   Laura Dugger: (52:21 - 52:34) Oh, wonderful. We will link to both of those in our show notes. And are there any practical needs that you do have at this time or any specific prayer requests you would like to share with us?   James Jetton: (52:35 - 53:26) You know, I think the specific prayer requests are just for me and for my kids. So, things are going to look different for them for sure. And I know there's going to be some hard moments.   So, I guess the prayer would just be, you know, provision as God's always provided. And, you know, when I say that, I don't just talk about it in like a material way, but like He seems to provide us with feelings, emotions, people, support, all of that. And so just provision for my kids and just encouragement and support for them as we've kind of walked through these, these new firsts for the kids and, and that it will just, they will still have, find the joy that we always talk about choosing and, and that my wife did so well that we will continue to find that joy through these more difficult days ahead for sure.   Laura Dugger: (53:26 - 53:58) Yes, Lord may it be so. Well, James, you clearly just have so much wisdom to share and I appreciate you walking through so much of your personal journey. And I know that you also do have a lighthearted personality and we're going to end on a lighter note because you may know that we're called The Savvy Sauce because Savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge.   And so, as my final question for you today, what is your Savvy Sauce?   James Jetton: (54:01 - 54:51) You know, my Savvy Sauce, it's just, it's one day at a time. I think that we get overwhelmed with, you know, I joke with people, like it's a stupid joke. But hey, if God wanted to give us more than one day at a time, He would. So, we only get one day, and He doesn't give us two days at one time.   You know, just taking things as they come one day at a time. We all have our goals. We all have our plans, our dreams and aspirations, but leaving space for the Holy Spirit and how God moves is critical.   And when you're walking through grief and you're walking through hard stuff, like thinking about too much out there in front of you can be debilitating. And so just focus on what your next step, just take one more step. We can always take one more step.   And so just kind of day at a time and just take one more step.   Laura Dugger: (54:52 - 55:08) James, thank you for your faithfulness to Kaet, your faithfulness to our Lord, your faithfulness to your children. And we will all be praying for each of you in this coming season and beyond. And just really grateful for you being my guest today.   James Jetton: (55:09 - 55:26) Well, I'm really grateful to be here. This is great. I'm thankful for the chance to just share her story and share our story.   I feel God has just moved and worked through us in so many amazing ways. And anytime I can get a chance to share how God has moved and worked, I'm thankful. So, thank you for having me.   Laura Dugger: (55:26 - 58:42) It's been an honor. One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term gospel before?   It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there is absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior. But God loved us so much, he made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus.   We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says, “That if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” So, would you pray with me now?   Heavenly Father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life?   We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.   If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me, so me for him. You get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason.   We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you ready to get started? First, tell someone.   Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes & Noble and let me choose my own Bible.   I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ.   I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps, such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We wa

If you have ever felt disconnected with your spouse- particularly in the area of communication- this episode is especially for you.  Steven and his wife, Tracy, walked through more than two decades of disconnection. Twenty-five years is a long time to feel lost in your marriage. To feel like no matter what you try, you just can't find your way back to each other. They loved God. They were raising six children together. They wanted their marriage to thrive. But somehow, they kept missing each other. Their communication felt off, and it wasn't just about words—it was about how every part of their life as a couple felt misaligned. Marriage Problems After 25 Years: Feeling Stuck and Disconnected Steven and Tracy did what many couples in their situation try to do. They sought help. They met with counselors and pastors. They heard wise advice. But for some reason, it just didn't seem to stick in their day-to-day lives. They felt like they were doing all the right things, yet their relationship still felt strained. The alignment they hoped for—spiritually, emotionally, practically—kept slipping through their fingers. It's hard to describe how wearying that becomes over time. You start to wonder if it will ever change, or if you're destined to just live alongside each other, rather than truly enjoy the beauty of partnership that marriage is meant to be. Signs of Hope: When One Spouse Begins to Change What began to open things up wasn't what Steven expected. He started to notice a softness in Tracy. A new warmth in her communication. She seemed more open, more willing to engage in conversations in a way that felt safe and inviting. And that tenderness in her sparked something in him. He realized, deep in his heart, that he wanted to experience that same kind of shift. He didn't want to keep circling the same frustrations. He wanted his heart to change too—not just so things would feel better, but because he longed to love her well. There's something so beautiful about that. Sometimes, it's the gentle transformation in one spouse that awakens the hope in the other. And that's exactly what happened for Steven. How Focusing on Personal Growth Can Transform Your Marriage What truly began to move the needle for Steven was recognizing where his focus had been all along. For many years, like so many of us, he had been looking at his wife's responses, her choices, her attitude. But when he started to reflect more deeply, he realized the bigger breakthrough would come from within himself. That shift—from focusing outward to focusing inward—was a game changer. Instead of waiting for Tracy to change, he opened his heart to the changes God wanted to do in him. He began to see how his own patterns of thought and communication were shaping their dynamic. And as he leaned into that growth, the atmosphere of their marriage began to change. Learning to Communicate Better in Marriage Steven described it as learning to dance. For years, he and Tracy were moving to different rhythms. Even when they had good intentions, they kept stepping on each other's toes. When you don't know the steps, no matter how much you love the other person, the dance feels clumsy. Missteps are frustrating and discouraging. But as Steven grew in understanding and grace, he began to move in rhythm with his wife. He learned how to lead with humility and gentleness. And as he did, Tracy responded. She became more willing to follow his lead—not because she was forced to, but because it felt safe and loving to do so. Their dance transformed from awkward steps to something fluid, connected, and beautiful. Why Humility Is Key to a Stronger Marriage What I find so deeply inspiring about Steven's journey is the way he embraced humility. He didn't cling to pride. He didn't stay stuck in frustration, demanding that his wife change first. Instead, he knelt before God—both literally and figuratively—and opened his heart to being transformed himself. That posture of surrender made space for God to work powerfully in his life and marriage. And it's a reminder for all of us: no matter how broken things feel, when we choose humility and invite God into our hearts and homes, He begins to weave a story of redemption that's more beautiful than we could have imagined. What a Healthy Marriage Looks Like After Healing Today, Steven and Tracy still face challenges, but what's different now is how they handle them. What used to take days, weeks, or even months to resolve now takes minutes—sometimes even seconds. They've learned to recognize when they're drifting out of alignment and come back quickly to unity and connection. Their marriage isn't just surviving anymore. It's thriving. There's joy. There's intimacy. There's a deep excitement about what God is continuing to do in their relationship. It's a miracle of grace, truly. There Is Hope for Your Marriage, Too Friend, if you find yourself where Steven once was—tired, discouraged, wondering if things will ever change—I want you to hear this clearly: there is a way forward. Take courage. Let hope rise in your heart. Open yourself to the possibility that the story isn't over—and that the next chapter could be more beautiful than you've imagined.   With love,   Belah & Team   PS - Want to know more about the current health of your marriage? Take our free Marital Health Assessment to discover your Marital Health score and receive further insight on next steps. PPS - Here is a quote from (another) recent graduate: “Tension between us is pretty much gone! Our relationship, our discussions have become much more peaceful, easygoing and playful than before. My wife has become more affectionate and has initiated intimacy more! We can now discuss physical intimacy and not argue. She has told me many times how she likes the changes she sees in me…Other people around us, even strangers, have noticed something different about us.”

Let's say you bought something this week—a new pair of shoes, a few Amazon “add to cart” moments—and didn't tell your spouse. Not because it was a big secret, but because… what's the point, right?Guess what...Most of us aren't intentionally lying in our marriages.But we're often not fully telling the truth either.We leave out the small stuff—spending, frustrations, unmet needs—because we're trying to avoid conflict or protect ourselves from judgment. But those little omissions? They slowly pull us away from the very intimacy we crave.This week on AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I'm talking about what it really means to be open and honest in your relationship—and why this kind of vulnerability is one of the most important things you can practice.We'll explore:Why we hold back (even when we think it's “not a big deal”)How hiding creates cracks in the foundation of your marriageWhat it looks like to start being more honest in small, safe waysHow to prepare your nervous system for the discomfort of truth—and the connection that followsA real-life example of how one couple began opening up about their spendingIf you've ever felt like you and your spouse live beside each other more than with each other… this episode is for you.And if you're ready to take this deeper in your own marriage, book a Courageous Love Conversation with me. We'll gently uncover where honesty and connection might be waiting for you.To truth, trust, and a deeper kind of love,ChristineCBS News Interview: 6 Tips For A Healthy & Loving RelationshipUnlock deeper connection in your marriage with my free guide, Daily Prompts for Deeper Connection with Your Spouse—get it now! Start feeling more connected and loved in your marriage today with my free Reclaim More Love in Just 3 Days process. This process will have you learning how to shift your focus, in a healthy way, and nurture thoughts that build connection and transform how you feel about your marriage. More resources and how you can start the process of Awakening(YourTrue)You and being the partner who creates your best version of what marriage looks like for you: https://christinebongiovanni.com/Join my AwakenYou newsletter for weekly marriage tips and early announcements of upcoming offerings.Book your free Courageous Love Conversation here.InstagramFacebook

We've talked about the fact that many women struggle to ‘flip the switch' and enjoy married sex, and we've talked about what might contribute to that. But we haven't talked about what husbands can do to help their wives enjoy sex. Juli shares a conversation from Gary Thomas' Podcast where she was a panelist alongside Debra Fileta and Belah Rose.   Host: Gary Thomas   Featured Speakers: Dr. Juli Slattery, Debra Fileta, MA, LPC and Belah Rose   Gary's Website: garythomas.com Gary's Newsletter: garythomasbooks.substack.com   Book: Married Sex by Gary Thomas and Debra Fileta, MA, LPC Book: Rethinking Sexuality by Dr. Juli Slattery Book: God, Sex and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery   Juli's Website: authenticintimacy.com Debra's Website: debrafileta.com Belah's Website: delightyourmarriage.com   Please support Joy and Zack Skarka on GoFundMe   Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

How to Know if Your Marriage is Heading for Divorce? There are warning signs and red flags that most people miss on their way to the courthouse. Don't make the same mistake!As a thank you for listening to the podcast, here's my gift to you – one of my post popular (and controversial) books, New Days Old Demons: https://realfaith.com/fire/Follow on social media!YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/MarkDriscollMinistries?sub_confirmation=1Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pastormarkInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/markdriscollTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@pastormarkdriscollTwitter: https://linktr.ee/markdriscoll Click here for more resources: https://linktr.ee/markdriscoll

Ten Ways to Let Go of Control in Your Marriage Part 3

In this episode, Brooke Thomas and her husband, Brett Thomas, share the #1 secret to building a marriage that not only survives the test of time but thrives through every season. With over 20 years of marriage, they've learned powerful lessons that have kept their love strong, vibrant, and growing—even through the hardest moments. Brooke and Brett dive into practical strategies, faith-filled insights, and real-world advice to help couples create a thriving marriage that lasts. Whether you're newly married, celebrating decades together, or somewhere in between, this episode offers valuable secrets to help you strengthen your relationship, deepen your connection, and navigate each season with love, joy, and peace. Tune in to hear the #1 secret that will transform your relationship and empower you to build a marriage that goes the distance!   Show Notes: Timestamps: 

Love & Respect: The Game-Changer for Your Marriage.Feeling stuck in a cycle of frustration with your spouse? Ephesians 5:33 holds the key! In this episode, we're diving into why love is a woman's greatest need and respect is a man's—and how missing this creates disconnection. Learn how to break the cycle, shift your interactions, and bring peace back to your marriage. Enjoy!Next Steps:>> Be a part of our Facebook community here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FB Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (PS: must answer all questions in order to join).>> Have a question for us? Reach out on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@thrivingkingdommarriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Loving The Content? Please support us by leaving us a 5 star rating, leaving a review & sharing the podcast with those you love! We're grateful for you.With love, Nick & Haley.

In this live recording of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott respond to John Elmore's talk from the 2025 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference. We discuss some of the practical implications of the fact that Jesus is the composer, conductor, and canon of the melody of our marriages. If you haven't listened to it yet, go ahead and listen to John's message. Questions to Discuss:1. How can you make Jesus ultimate in your marriage?2. How can you and your spouse become more dependent on the Lord in your life and in your marriage?3. Because Jesus is the center of our lives and marriages, how can you be on mission together in your marriage? Scriptures:MT 6:332 Tim 2:4Eph 4:2-3John 15:5Genesis 2:18PR 27:6, 17Acts 20:24 Resources:MTR Episode 121 - Christ is the Melody of Your Marriage (feat. John Elmore)

Ten Ways to Let Go of Control in Your Marriage Part 2

You know that subtle ache when your spouse is right there… but still feels far away?This week on AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I'm talking about what it really means to reconnect in your marriage—and why it so often feels harder than it should.Because for many, it's not that you don't want to feel close again… it's that you're not sure how to bridge the growing gap—especially when your spouse doesn't seem to feel the same urgency you do.In this episode, I'll walk you through:• Why disconnection creeps in slowly—and why it's rarely about one big thing• What it actually looks like to reconnect (hint: it's not just about more time together)• Why one partner often feels the disconnection long before the other• What to do when it feels unsafe to be vulnerable• And how to start rebuilding closeness… even if your spouse isn't on board yetThis episode is especially for the one in the marriage who's starting to notice how lonely it feels—and wants to take the first steps toward something better.You don't have to wait for your spouse to be ready. You can lead the way.And I'll show you how.CBS News Interview: 6 Tips For A Healthy & Loving RelationshipUnlock deeper connection in your marriage with my free guide, Daily Prompts for Deeper Connection with Your Spouse—get it now! Start feeling more connected and loved in your marriage today with my free Reclaim More Love in Just 3 Days process. This process will have you learning how to shift your focus, in a healthy way, and nurture thoughts that build connection and transform how you feel about your marriage. More resources and how you can start the process of Awakening(YourTrue)You and being the partner who creates your best version of what marriage looks like for you: https://christinebongiovanni.com/Join my AwakenYou newsletter for weekly marriage tips and early announcements of upcoming offerings.Book your free Courageous Love Conversation here.InstagramFacebook

Ten Ways to Let Go of Control in Your Marriage Part 1

Matt Hammitt joins us this week with some stories a lot of us can relate to. He's married and has four children and his son was born with half of a heart. He's the former lead singer of Sanctus Real from 1996-2016. At the beginning, his wife was on the tour with the band. He details His book Lead Me: Finding Courage to Fight for Your Marriage, Children and Faith is very vulnerable talking about the challenges of being on the road without your wife and family, his son almost dying when he was born, not knowing how to deal with marital conflict, imposter syndrome and more. Even though Matt and I talk about some difficulties that we've experienced, we bonded and laughed often throughout this episode. -What should you do when your wife "TRIGGERS" you? -How do you and your wife Grieve? -When you are going through -Does your wife want you to lead your family? -What words has Matt used to work through Imposter Syndome? -Where did the song Lead Me come from? -Is who we hope to be really how people we love see us?   CHALLENGE: Do an Audit of your life. Who we are versus who we want to be? What's keeping me from walking it out today?   Check out Matt Hammitt's website HERE And check out his new song No Matter the Cost. It's really good. Check out the tour that Matt is on with Kirk Cameron and also check out the great kid's books HERE JOIN our FREE Facebook group for Dads at The Journey of a Christian Dad click HERE Check out my wife and daughter's books on Amazon HERE Check out a book I contributed to called Notes From Dad HERE                    

Real fulfillment isn't found in how much you accomplish, but in learning to enjoy God and your spouse. John and the Smalley's bring up how a lot of couples are on the verge of burning out from doing too much. Plus, Brad Rhoads talks with his wife Marilyn and Jim Daly about a time where a loving friend confronted him on trying to accomplish too many things at once. Find us online at focusonthefamily.com/marriagepodcast or call 1-800-A-FAMILY. Receive the book The Grace Marriage for your donation of any amount! Focus on Marriage Assessment Listen Anytime Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage Loving the Story of Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2) Support This Show! If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

On her book's launch day, J. Parker hosts three fellow higher desire wives—Tara Buchanan, Julie Sibert, and Tammy Hopkins—for a special roundtable on when she wants sex more than he does. NOTE: Please forgive the not-so-great audio at times in this episode. We did our best without the usual professional equipment. Sponsor Check out J. Parker's new book, The Higher Desire Wife, now available wherever books are sold! From the Bible I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. Song of Songs 7:10 Resources The Higher Desire Wife: Understanding and Help for Christian Women Navigating Mismatched Sex Drives by J. Parker The Higher Desire Wife - Baker Book House (best US price) Behind Our Smiles podcast, with Tara & Joe Buchanan Intimacy in Marriage – Julie Sibert Pursuit of Passion: Discovering True Intimacy in Your Marriage by Jeffrey Murphy & Julie Sibert Higher Desire Wife Community The Marriage Bed (mentioned by Tammy) Thanks for joining us at the virtual kitchen table for another great chat! If you could, we'd appreciate you leaving a rating and/or review so that others can find the show. Please be sure to check out our website and webinars at forchristianwives.com. And visit our individual ministry pages for more resources as well: Strong Wives - Bonny Burns Honeycomb & Spice - Chris Taylor Hot, Holy & Humorous - J. Parker

Real fulfillment isn't found in how much you accomplish, but in learning to enjoy God and your spouse. John and the Smalley's bring up how a lot of couples are on the verge of burning out from doing too much. Plus, Brad Rhoads talks with his wife Marilyn and Jim Daly about a time where a loving friend confronted him on trying to accomplish too many things at once. Find us online at focusonthefamily.com/marriagepodcast or call 1-800-A-FAMILY. Receive the book The Grace Marriage for your donation of any amount! Focus on Marriage Assessment Listen Anytime Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage Loving the Story of Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2) Support This Show! If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback. To support this ministry financially, visit: https://www.oneplace.com/donate/1196/29

“You're going to stay in this marriage.” This was the message Nicole Berlucchi heard from God. Before this, Nicole was convinced she was doing most of the work at home and in her marriage. Her friends told her she was a “saint” for putting up with her husband. To top it off, Nicole's husband was unwilling to go to therapy. Nicole was sure God was on her side. Nicole left her husband for four days to discern if she was going to leave him. While Nicole entered this time of discernment relatively certain she was headed for divorce, God made it clear that Nicole needed to change and give her marriage a chance. Nicole engaged in a very difficult season of healing that resulted in the transformation of her heart and marriage. Listen to this mini-retreat in a podcast in Mamas in Spirit's Lenten Series: HEAL. Allow God to help you remove barriers to love and be loved. Nicole Berlucchi is the author of “Magnify Love: Unlocking the Heart of Jesus in Your Marriage and Your Life.”    

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott talk about the importance of good investments. There are many ways we can invest our time, money, and energy, and in this episode we discuss the importance of regularly investing in your marriage. Resources:Book - Surrendered Sexuality: How Knowing Jesus Changes... Everything, by Juli Slattery (release July 1, 2025)MTR Episode 62 – Your Marriage and the Unhurried Life (feat. Chris Schultz)MTR Episode 64 – Questions to Ask Your Spouse Every WeekMTR Episode 90 – Our Favorite Marriage ResourcesIntentionality In Your Marriage – John & Pam McGee, Uncommon Marriage Conference 2022 Scriptures:Ephesians 5:25Matthew 6:21 Questions to Discuss:What are some areas of your life where you invest your time, money, and energy?How can you invest more time and energy in your marriage?How can you invest more money in your marriage?

Special Patreon Re-Release: God, Sex, and Your Marriage: Interview with Dr. Juli Slattery    *DISCLAIMER* This interview includes some adult themes and is not intended for young ears.   **Transcription Below**   Matthew 9:37 (NIV) "Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few."   Questions we discuss: For many couples, sex can be a difficult area of marriage and you encourage people that is normal, but you also warn us not to confuse normal with healthy. What is normal for married couples and what is healthy, as it relates to sexual intimacy in marriage? What is God's genius chemical cocktail that we experience during sex? Will you give a brief overview of your four pillars of intimacy?   Dr. Juli Slattery is a clinical psychologist, author, speaker and broadcast media professional with over twenty-five years of experience counseling, and teaching women. She's the president and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, a unique ministry devoted to teaching God's design for intimacy and sexuality. In 2020, Juli launched SexualDiscipleship.com, a platform designed to help Christian leaders navigate sexual issues and questions with gospel-centered truth. She hosts a weekly podcast, Java with Juli, where she answers tough questions about relationships, marriage, and spiritual, emotional and sexual intimacy.  www.authenticintimacy.com    Other Episodes with Dr. Juli Slattery on The Savvy Sauce:   Passion Pursuit with Dr. Juli Slattery   Patreon 26 Holy Sex with Dr. Juli Slattery   Life-Giving Marriage with Dr. Juli Slattery   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   **Transcription**   [00:00:00]   Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.    [00:00:18]   Laura Dugger: Today's message is not intended for little ears. We'll be discussing some adult themes, and I want you to be aware before you listen to this message.   I'm grateful for today's sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Check them out online to place your order for dining or catering, or to fill out an application to join their friendly team. Visit cfaeastpeoria.com.   Hey friends, I wanted to share some exciting news with you. Savvy Sauce Charities has officially received our confirmation from the IRS that all donations are tax deductible. I know that we have super generous listeners, so we wanted to let you know you can now mail your check to Savvy Sauce Charities, P.O. Box 101, Roanoke, Illinois, 61561. Thanks in advance for supporting Savvy Sauce Charities. [00:01:24]    And now I'm pleased to share this episode with you that used to only be available to paying patrons. Dr. Juli Slattery is my returning guest today. She has written another fantastic book entitled God, Sex, and Your Marriage. And now she's going to give us a healthy vision for sexual intimacy in marriage and share actionable ways that we can grow in maturity and delight and health in our relationship with our spouse.    Here's our chat.   Welcome back to The Savvy Sauce, Dr. Juli.   Dr Juli Slattery: Oh, thanks so much for having me.   Laura Dugger: Well, even from the get-go on the dedication page of your book, you dedicate it to your brothers and sisters in Christ, some who have labored before you, and some who now work alongside you in reclaiming God's design for sex. You quote the last part of Matthew 9:37, when you say, "The field is ripe for the harvest, but the laborers are few." [00:02:28] Will you elaborate on what you mean by this?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. I think within the field of Christian sexuality, there are things that we can disagree on. Some of those conversations can be characterized by looking back at what people have written before and being critical of that or looking at the ways that we disagree today on different topics and how we apply the scriptures.    So as I was wrapping up this book, I just have such a heart for unity in the body of Christ and recognize that there are so few people that really want to see God reclaim biblical sexuality, that I just want us to link arms and to work together, to learn from each other, to give honor to each other, and just to be in the trenches, like encouraging one another, instead of focusing on maybe where we differ. [00:03:25]    So that's kind of the heart of it, as well as just a gratitude for the people that have gone before us, the people that were speaking and writing on this topic over the last few decades. Again, I think we're looking back and saying purity culture was horrible and, you know, like just be with more of a critical eye, which we need to learn from the past. But I think, you know, I just really want to have a spirit of graciousness and unity as we say, Hey, we're kind of working off of the shoulders of the people who have been really pioneers in this field.   Laura Dugger: I think that goal of unity is such a worthy one. For so many couples, sex can be a difficult area of marriage. And you write that this is very normal, but you also warn us not to confuse normal with healthy. You go on to write, and I'll just quote it here, "Just consider that the normal American is overweight, overstimulated, exhausted, and lonely." [00:04:29] So, Juli, from your perspective, what is normal for married couples and what is healthy as it relates to sexual intimacy in marriage?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I would say normal is a lot of conflict around sex, frustration, unfulfilled desires, lack of communication. They don't know how to talk about sex or navigate conflict around just differences. I think it's normal for there to be some level of pornography in a marriage. One or both of the individuals bringing in a history of pornography and a struggle with pornography. I think it's normal to have a lot of confusion and shame just around being a sexual person.    So those are all sort of the normal barometer of what I see as I talk to married Christian couples. Again, I think there's peace in knowing, okay, we have good company around us. We're not the only couple struggling with these things, but I also don't want that to be a message that things should just stay the way they are. [00:05:35]    Laura Dugger: I love that. Can you elaborate then on what is healthy?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. So healthy is sort of the opposite of what I've mentioned. Healthy is that there's healthy, regular communication around sex. So a couple can talk about not just how often they want to have sex, but the deeper issues of what does sex represent for me as an individual? What does it represent for us as a couple? Being able to talk through things from the past, past wounds and shame, and being able to seek the Lord together. It's healthy to honor each other in their sexual relationship, honor the differences that they might be bringing of sexual desire and what they're hoping for in their sexual relationship, navigating together the challenges that they face, but navigating as a team.   So the challenges of we have no energy because we're exhausted with little kids or the challenges of one of us might be working through some trauma from the past, the challenges of how do we address the pornography in our marriage and how do we learn to enjoy each other within our own covenant? [00:06:46]    So those are kind of the markers of a healthy sex life. I don't think there are many couples who would just say automatically, we were there when we first got married. But unfortunately, I think there are also not a lot of couples who would say we're actually working towards those goals. Instead, we have a tendency to just kind of stay stuck where we are.   Laura Dugger: I think an obvious answer would be that communication is going to help us move in that direction of health. But if this healthy vision sounds wonderful, how do people actually engage in this? What are a few of the first steps they can take?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I think one of the first steps is just really broadening your horizon of what God created sex to be. And really, it's taking a step back and asking yourself the question, what do you think a good sex life is actually supposed to look like from a Christian standpoint? [00:07:45]    I think it's fascinating for couples to have that conversation and, first of all, to see where they differ in their understanding of what a good sex life is meant to be, but also where they struggle to flesh it out because there just hasn't been a lot of great teaching on, how do we as a couple even have the same goals related to our sex life.   That was the main reason why I wrote God, Sex, and Your Marriage was to give Christian married couples a vision for what God created sex to be and to have them together agree on, here's what our mature sex life is meant to look like and we want to start working toward that. But if you don't know what you're working toward, then you're just going to stay stuck.   Laura Dugger: I appreciate resources like this. If anybody's listened to any of our other topics on sexual intimacy on The Savvy Sauce, you know that we recommend reading a book, ideally with each other. But even if it's just you reading it yourself, there's so much to glean. [00:08:49] And like you said, Juli, you're casting this vision.   But then even as you read this aloud to one another or you each read a chapter and then come together and discuss, it gets you comfortable talking about this language and it brings up even more questions like you just mentioned that can be natural conversation starters.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, that's a great suggestion for every married couple, including myself and my husband. I guess something that we've tried to do throughout our marriage is to be reading a book on sex together, preferably, as you mentioned, out loud, because it really does get you comfortable in terms of just what language to use and what it's like to have a conversation around sex.   Laura Dugger: Absolutely. So just really, I've thought this so many times, but thank you for the labor and the work you put into putting this resource together so that we have an option that we can trust.    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, well, I think we tend to write the books that we would want to read. So, yeah, a lot of it has just come out of our own journey. [00:09:49]    Laura Dugger: Well, and I agree with another point that you make in the book when you talk about sex being so important to God and so we can expect it to constantly be under spiritual attack. So will you just tell us more about that idea?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. I think the average Christian, as you look at the cultural landscape, there's no question that sex is under attack and that we see it distorted and we see it being such a confusing topic for our kids, for just our culture. We can recognize that and we can look at different ways that sex is being used against us in our world today, but we're less likely to see how that's happening within our own marriages.   But I think just being aware of the fact that Satan hates everything God made as beautiful, and sex is such a powerful picture of God's covenant love, of the fact that he created us for intimate unity. That Satan really wants to twist that. And he'll do it any way he can. [00:10:56] He'll do it through shame. He'll do it through us even having a very limited perspective of what sex should be. He'll do it through dividing you and having sex be the main source of conflict in your marriage. He'll do it through pornography and marital affairs and betrayal.    I think we have to be on the lookout and say, hey, this really is a spiritual terrain, not just in the world at large, but it's a spiritual terrain within my own heart and within our marriage.   Laura Dugger: But then you don't leave us there with that message of attack because in that same chapter you conclude with this quote: "God's power to redeem is greater than Satan's power to destroy." So, Juli, how have you seen that practically played out in couples' lives?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Boy, I've just been so blessed to see that played out over and over again. In the ministry that I run, Authentic Intimacy, we've been doing this for a decade now. [00:11:56] I can't explain it, but all I can tell you is that when an individual or a couple begins to really get God's perspective of sexuality, when they alone or together begin to surrender this area of their life to God, you just see change, you see healing, you see redemption, you see freedom where there once was shame and lies.   It's commonplace in our ministry to see that, which is amazing because every life that's redeemed really is a work of God. But the scripture says that His word doesn't return void, but it accomplishes what it's sent out to do. And I get to see that. I get to see that as couples are healing and recovering from betrayal, as people are looking to get set free from pornography, as people are trying to navigate the impact of past trauma and what that's done to their sex life, as couples are confronting some of the anger or bitterness or selfishness that have developed over the years because of their differences and sexual desire. [00:13:03] I've just gotten to see all those sort of things redeemed by God's power, and sex starts to become something that really does unify a husband and wife together.   Laura Dugger: Well, that makes so much sense because I've been convicted so many times and had to be reminded when God will gently call me back to Himself where I've shared a struggle with my husband, or if I'm questioning something in parenting and I'm just thinking on it and ruminating on it, God will gently remind me, come to Me with this, share with Me. And in the same way, with the topic of sex, you're encouraging us in this book to invite God to fight for us, and it's really His strength and power that can heal us in this sacred space.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. It makes so much sense, Laura. But in reality, I think most of us kind of bar God from our sex lives. We don't realize we do it, but we never praise a married couple about our sex lives.[00:14:07] We never invite God into our shame. We never even think or want to think about the fact that He's present with us in the bedroom because that sort of creeps us out.    But if you're trying to fight a spiritual battle with your own strength and you're barring God's presence from that place, then you're not going to win it. I had to confront this in my own life in marriage many years ago. I didn't realize how much I was doing that, but I think because the church has been so silent on sex over the years, we just naturally have this sort of separate category of sexuality where God doesn't enter. So, boy, what a powerful thing to begin surrendering this to the Lord and asking for His wisdom and His help.   Laura Dugger: Powerful indeed. I remember one wife shared with me they don't pray together about sex out loud, but she has prayed before, even when they're in the act, and just shared real-time, Okay, Lord, I'm having a really hard time experiencing orgasm, and I would love to experience that today, so can you help me get there?" [00:15:16] And she said the results have been incredible. And I just think He cares so much about every detail of our lives that I love that story and what she shared because I think it shows His heart that He wants to share delight with us, and He's created this.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, it brings God honor and pleasure when a married couple enjoys sex to the fullest because that's what He created it for. I think somehow we've bought this lie that God's embarrassed of our sexuality or it's a necessary evil, instead of it being something that we clearly see in the Song of Solomon and Proverbs chapter 5 and other places in Scripture that God delights in this. He created sex for this purpose.   And part of fighting the spiritual battle that we face in our world is reclaiming the ground of what sex looks like in our marriage. And so there are a lot of people who are frustrated at what's happening to their kids or what's happening to our culture, but at the same time they don't fight for godly sexuality within the space of their own bedroom. [00:16:22] And that really is where the battle begins, is in our own hearts and our own lives.   Laura Dugger: Well, let's now discuss the four pillars of intimacy, and hopefully you can just give a brief overview of each. Beginning with faithfulness and specifically, why do you write that holy jealousy is good?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. If I can back up just for a minute, the whole premise of this book is that God created sex within marriage to be a form of revelation. Like through marriage and sexuality, the Scripture says God is revealing to us what his covenant love is like. And we see that in the Old Testament in God's covenant relationship with Israel and how often He used language of marriage and sexuality as a metaphor to explain His love for Israel.    Then in the New Testament we see the same thing happen with Jesus' relationship with the church. We see all this bridal language, intimacy language, sexual language to express what covenant looks like between Christ and His bride. [00:17:35] And I know for a lot of people that's sort of a mind shift, but if you can think about it this way, God creates the physical world in order to reveal Himself to us. So God has created marriage and sexuality as a form of revelation to reveal for us this special relationship of covenant.   So what I did with these four pillars of covenant love is say, OK, if God's love, if His covenant love is like this, then this is what defines a healthy sex life. So I broke down these four aspects of God's love for His covenant people and then applied it to sexuality.    So the first pillar that I talk about there is faithfulness. That faithfulness is the very foundation of any covenant. That a covenant isn't a relationship that's based on what feels good or what I feel like doing in the moment. It's a relationship based on your character, on your promise.    Part of that is that within covenant you have a sacred sense of belonging to each other. And so there is a holy jealousy within covenant. [00:18:43] And we see this in God's relationship with Israel where God actually says, My name is jealous. I am jealous for you. I'm a jealous God. And when you worship other gods, I'm angry.    That seems to be true within the covenant of marriage, that sexually we belong to each other exclusively, and there should be a healthy anger, protectiveness, and even jealousy if that exclusivity isn't honored. So, Laura, for example, I was talking to a woman who her marriage was in bad shape. There had been conflict over many years, there had been pornography addiction, and her husband cheated on her. And she said, "I was so dead that I wasn't even angry. My love for him was so dead that I didn't even get mad." [00:19:43] You'd be like, "Why would she not get mad? Is that a sign of health to not get mad when your husband cheats?" No. That's a sign of a very dysfunctional relationship, of a covenant that's dead.    So a healthy marriage means that we fight for each other and we protect our sexual relationship and that if there is a violation, then there is reason to be upset,there is reason to be angry. I think this is so key that we talk about you really can't build anything else in your sex life if you don't have faithfulness. That's the bare minimum foundation.   Laura Dugger: And now a brief message from our sponsors.    [00:20:25]   Sponsor: I want to say thank you to our longtime sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. I hope that you've already downloaded the Chick-fil-A app. Because did you know that with the app you can skip the line and have food ready for you when you arrive? This is one of my favorite options when I'm taking my four daughters to Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Download the Chick-fil-A app today and start earning points toward free rewards that are fully customized to your preferences and tastes.   Chick-fil-A was named as one of Glassdoor's best places to work in the nation. That's a huge honor. And one team member even wrote, "No comparison. This is a great job for a first job, extra money, or for career advancement. Such a loving environment, great management, and fair pay." Chick-fil-A believes that the local and involved ownership ensures fostering an environment where you are known, challenged, and cared for.   So if you're looking for a wonderful place to work, visit Chick-fil-A East Peoria or fill out an application online today at cfaeastpeoria.com.    [00:21:31]   Laura Dugger: We are so excited to celebrate with you that The Savvy Sauce Charities received our IRS confirmation that all donations are officially tax deductible. We hope that you're going to take action to partner with us.   There are details laid out on our website, which is thesavvysauce.com, and they're going to walk you through the process to donate, and it's also going to share our tax ID number. The donation process is as easy as just filling out a check for Savvy Sauce Charities and mailing it to P.O. Box 101, Roanoke, Illinois, 61561.    If we've contributed to your life in any way by resourcing you to grow closer in intimacy with God and others, would you now contribute to us financially? In this way, we are so excited to partner together and hopefully meet each other's needs. Our team wants to continue producing these podcasts, and we're expectant that if you're listening right now, you value The Savvy Sauce Charities enough to make a donation.    We view this work as ministry, so we happily spend thousands of dollars each year to record and produce these episodes. And our ultimate prayer is that your experience with Savvy Sauce Charities will make an impact for eternity. So if that is true for you, if you've ever received a blessing in any way from this nonprofit, would you prayerfully consider donating to Savvy Sauce Charities? Any amount is greatly appreciated.   And in fact, you've heard me say before, if every listener gave only $1 per month, it would completely offset all our costs. Again, we have all the details listed on our website, thesavvysauce.com, if you are interested in making a donation. We look forward to partnering with you.   [00:23:32]   Laura Dugger: Can you elaborate about the chemical cocktail and why God is so genius in this creation?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, sure. You know, I think one of the reasons that we really struggle with faithfulness is because we believe at a heart level that marriage is more about attractiveness and getting our sexual needs met than believing that marriage is about covenant. And one of the ways that I explain that is just to show, you know, God has designed new sex and a new relationship to elicit different kinds of chemicals in our brain than a long-term relationship and long-term sexual interaction.   So the new relationship is going to have adrenaline and a neurotransmitter called PEA. And together, adrenaline and PEA make you feel like there's this huge output of dopamine, which is the pleasure hormone of the brain. [00:24:34] And so it makes you feel intoxicated. It makes you feel like you're on a drug.    This is why pornography is so addictive. But God has given that cocktail in the beginning of a relationship, in the beginning of seeing each other naked for the first time, so that it would be a cementing kind of experience for a husband and wife. Unfortunately, our world has really hijacked that with pornography and other sexual offerings. But God's design is that you shouldn't be able to forget your honeymoon. Like it should be like a cementing experience for you.   But then as you're married for a while and you have sex regularly, you don't get that same adrenaline and PEA unless you're doing something kind of fun or new or exciting. But in general, you'll get just kind of output of oxytocin, which is a bonding hormone. It connects you to your spouse. And you also get endorphins, which is sort of a feel-good, all-is-well-with-the-world kind of neurotransmitter. [00:25:39]    And so God has designed a married sex life to have elements of both of these, of new and exciting things, say, for example, on your anniversary or you go away for a vacation and you're really focusing on your sex life, but also to have these bonding and feel-good chemicals to take place just in the normal course of life.    But, Laura, what happens is we get addicted to that new and exciting, and so we kind of begin to neglect the sexual relationship and instead are tempted by what's going to make us immediately feel good in the moment. So that's kind of just understanding how God wired our sexuality and, again, why He's a genius, but also understanding how, if we're not wise, that wiring can be worked against us.   Laura Dugger: That's so helpful to be wise in all of that. Just the incredible amounts that He gives us. You had cited another source that says men can have their oxytocin levels raised more than 500% after orgasm. [00:26:49] That may be why they're able to open up more emotionally after they've connected sexually. You also talk about the bonding agent of vasopressin. Would you like to share anything about that?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. So the two hormones, oxytocin and vasopressin, kind of go together. Vasopressin is kind of more, from what I understand, like the male form of oxytocin. But these hormones have been shown, as you mentioned, to bond people together, to make a man feel more connected and more likely to be vulnerable.    And interestingly, there's even some studies that show that a man whose body is rich with this oxytocin and vasopressin is less likely to be attracted to another woman. So some people will call it the fidelity hormone.   But when you begin to understand this as a wife, that regular sex with my husband is helping him feel emotionally closer to me, is fostering vulnerability and connection, is helping him to focus on me and me to focus on him, it helps with temptation that comes from the outside. [00:28:02]    And that's not at all to put pressure on a wife to say it's your job to keep your husband faithful. But it is to recognize that God has created sex to be a very powerful experience that is meant to bond you together. And you want to use that for the advantage of your marriage instead of allowing the enemy to use it as something that could tear you apart.   Laura Dugger: That's so good. There's so much there in that first pillar of faithfulness. But for the second pillar of intimate knowing, what separates that intimate knowing from what you call a sanctified hookup?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I think, again, we have to go back to God's covenant love to understand what we're working towards. And if you have been in a covenant relationship with God through Jesus Christ for any amount of time, hopefully you've learned that one of the goals of your relationship with God is to know Him more intimately, to say, Hey, I know God and Jesus more intimately today than I did five years ago. [00:29:07] And through the struggles of life, through the highs and the lows, I've developed intimacy with the Lord.   Jesus talks about this when he talks about, you know, being so intimately connected to Him, it's like a vine in a branch. Like we're in communion all the time. So when we apply that to our sexual relationship, the goal of sex is not just to have our bodies exchange fluids, but it's to be on a journey together of deep knowing of sharing with each other.   Just like in our relationship with God, the valleys, the difficulties, actually are when intimacy can be forged even greater than when things are going well. And I think this is really important because for most married couples, they're going to experience some real challenges in their sex life.   Dr. Juli Slattery: challenges in their sex life and instead of just saying, well, we can't enjoy each other or we have different desires, looking at that as an opportunity of, how do I know my spouse more intimately because of the challenge that we're experiencing? [00:30:12]    When I work with couples who are going through difficulties like infertility or somebody's struggle with pornography or somebody's struggle with healing, what those couples will say is now we're beginning to talk at a deeper level than do you want to have sex or not. Now, we're talking about my shame underneath my sexuality or my frustration that I walked into marriage with these expectations and now I feel like they're not being met. So you're beginning to communicate about your heart, you're beginning to share the sexual journey.   Unfortunately I think there are a lot of married couples who don't see this. All they think of is sex. It's just what our bodies are doing instead of really looking at it as an opportunity to forge intimacy at a much deeper level.   Laura Dugger: The third pillar is sacrificial giving. I'd love for you to share your personal story about God calling you to sacrificial giving. [00:31:15]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. One of the things that I've shared in my own life is that I'd say for the first 10 or 15 years of marriage, sex was one of those things that I wasn't very interested in, my husband was more interested in and particularly when we had three little boys running around the house, you know, I really avoided sex. I really didn't want to engage with it. I would always look for sort of the opportunity in the evening to say, “Hey, I need to do my devotions. This is my time.”    I remember going through that period of marriage where I would spend time with God usually in the evening and there would be times where it was like the Lord was really asking me, like if you really want to love Me and serve Me, why haven't you surrendered this area of your life to me?   And He began to just really prompt me to look at what it is to say, how do I love my husband sexually? How do I look at the conflict that I have within my own heart around sexuality and really begin to ask the Lord to heal that and to help me to enjoy what He has given me in marriage? [00:32:27] But during that season it was a lot of, how do I lay aside my own agenda and really understand my husband's sexual drive? How do I understand what would please him?    And Laura I just think a lot of us go into marriage and we think the sexual aspect of marriage will be something that won't require anything from us, that we just get to get, we get to receive. And for sure God has designed us to receive sexually, but He's also designed us so that we have to give sexually.   Why would he do that? Like people are like, why is God so cruel to make sex so difficult to navigate? But what God began to show me is He wants me to learn to love as Christ loves. Christ's love for us has always been sacrificial. And our love for Him in covenant is called to be sacrificial. We're called to lay down our own lives and take up the cross and follow Him. [00:33:30]    So I think there's something beautiful when we begin to understand that part of a healthy sex life is both the husband and wife approaching this with the attitude of, how do I serve you? How do I love you well? And when a husband and wife both have that attitude, the level of intimacy and even the level of pleasure has such a greater capacity than when we approach sexuality with just the mindset of what can I get from it.   Laura Dugger: Will you go even a little bit more specific with one of those quiet times with the Lord? What were you praying about? And what did he lead you to do?   Dr. Juli Slattery: So I was praying, you know, Lord, I just really want to know how to love You more and serve You. Like it was a time in my life where the Lord really was calling me deeper. What I just felt the Lord prompting me to do is to initiate sex with my husband.    I remember just kind of arguing with God in that moment, like, this is my time with You. You know, I think sometimes when we spend time with the Lord and we're studying the scripture, He wants us to actually put the Bible down and walk out what He's called us to do in his scripture. [00:34:45] And it was during that season of life again where God was just prompting me.   That night, that evening was the first time just prompting me like, hey, if you want to love Me more, if you want to know what My love is like, then go up and engage with your husband, because he's the one I've given you to love and he's the one I've given to love you. That really started us on a journey that didn't happen immediately, but over years of really surrendering this to God, we've learned what it is to serve each other and love each other well sexually.   Laura Dugger: And I'll just paraphrase from page 108 when that evening you sheepishly shared with your husband, when you came up and kind of surprised him and just said, "I was praying and it was like, God told me to come up here and initiate sex with you." And I love his response. He said, "No way! I was praying, asking God to tell you to do that." [00:35:44]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, that's a true story. That really happened. So yeah, it's amazing how God works.   Laura Dugger: I love that so much. I want to make sure that you're up to date with our latest news. We have a new website. You can visit TheSavvySauce.com and see all of the latest updates. You may remember Francie Hinrichsen from Episode 132, where we talked about pursuing our God-given dreams. She is the amazing businesswoman who has carefully designed a brand new website for SavvySauce Charities, and we are thrilled with the final product.So I hope you check it out.    There you're going to find all of our podcasts, now with show notes and transcriptions listed, a scrapbook of various previous guests, and an easy place to join our email list to receive monthly encouragement and questions to ask your loved ones, so that you can have your own practical chats for intentional living. [00:36:45]    You will also be able to access our donation button or our mailing address for sending checks that are tax deductible, so that you can support the work of SavvySauce Charities and help us continue to reach the nations with the good news of Jesus Christ. So make sure you visit TheSavvySauce.com.    I just appreciate those personal stories, even how when you were meeting with the Lord, having your quiet time, how He called you to go and seek your husband. There's a part of Matthew 5:23-24, that illustrates this as well. It just says, "Therefore, if you're offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them. Then come and offer your gift."   I just appreciate how the Lord even values that horizontal relationship first and the restoration there, and then you come back and reconnect vertically as well. [00:37:49]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Boy, it's true. Like that's the living out of our love for a God, for sure. There's also scripture that talks about like, if you say that you love Me, but you're not loving your brother, then your love for me isn't genuine. So I'm paraphrasing there. But you know, the scripture that I think has really gotten me over the years that I don't think many people apply to sexuality, is when Jesus is teaching at the Sermon on the Mount, and He says, even pagans know how to be kind to those who are kind to them. Like even pagans know how to greet those who greet them. But I say to you, love your enemies and do good to those who persecute you.    Not that my husband is my enemy, or was persecuting me, but the attitude of even a pagan wife knows how to love her husband well, when he's doing everything she wants, when he's attractive to her, when he's bringing her flowers, when he's attentive. But it requires the supernatural love of God for us to reach inside of ourselves and love in a way that is sacrificial. [00:39:01]    God wants us to become great lovers. He wants us to learn to love like He loves. And that's not a natural love that the average husband or wife can accomplish on their own strength. It's something that comes through intimacy with God and through saying, Lord, I want to become more like you in every area of my life. And again, our sexual relationship is not excluded from that. It perhaps can be the most challenging and vulnerable aspect of showing us how to love like God loves us.   Laura Dugger: Just one more thing to draw out of your chapter. I appreciated your balance between encouraging us to ask ourselves, are we being a cheerful giver? Then you also quote our mutual friend, Michael Sytsma, who is a pastor and also a certified sex therapist and author and speaker, that he says, the Bible does talk about fasting, but speaks far more about the feasting. [00:40:06]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Dr. Sytsma is just a wealth of wisdom on this topic. I've learned a lot from him. And that really sort of ushers in that fourth pillar of covenant love. So we've covered faithfulness, intimate knowing, sacrificial giving, but the fourth pillar is passionate celebration.    God has designed sex to be a passionate celebration of our covenant with each other. It is the way in our bodies that we remember, and we rejoice together that we've covenanted our lives to one another. God created sex to be pleasurable. He created the climax, He created the dopamine centers in our brain that go off with great delight when we experience sex with each other.    This is an important pillar. If you're looking at your sex life, and you say, okay, we're faithful to each other, and we're building intimate knowing, and I have a servant attitude, but I experienced no pleasure, then something's wrong with your sex life. [00:41:10] That's something that you need to work toward as an individual and as a married couple. There are a lot of Christian women who would identify with that, who would say, yeah, I do this primarily for my husband. I don't really love it. I don't really know how to enjoy it.    I would say to that woman that that's not the fullness of what God has designed for your sex life to look like in a marriage. He may be challenging you as he's challenged me over the years to really work on what does it look like for me to enjoy this gift, not just to be a giver of it, but also to be a receiver of it.   Laura Dugger: If anybody has their book, I'm thinking specifically, there is this part on page 133, where you draw out some fascinating discoveries about passionate celebration even in our relationship with the Lord, what that looks like, but how that transfers to the marriage as well. [00:42:10] Just things that we wouldn't think of: prayer and singing releasing certain bonding hormones.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. Yeah. So when you think about like our gatherings as a church body on Sundays or whenever you gather, what you're doing is you're gathering as part of the Bride of Christ. Usually we think of our Sunday services about the message. Yeah, the message is an important part, but it's not the most important part of our gathering. Our gathering is to express our love to our Savior and to our husband, to our heavenly Father, to all of it. We're rejoicing in Him. We're worshiping him as a collective group.    And what the research has shown is that when people gather together and they sing together out loud and when they dance, the same kind of chemicals are released in their brain as are released during sex. So they're getting the dopamine, they're getting the endorphins, they're getting the oxytocin. [00:43:15]    So when God's people get together and sing together and worship the Lord together, they're actually getting that same bonding hormone that unites you as the family of God, as a husband and wife would get together as they celebrate their covenant. So it's been really cool for me to study and to see these parallels of what God designed His relationship with us to be like, and then also what He designed marriage to be like. And to see that in many ways, even our bodily and neurological response will mirror each other.   Laura Dugger: It's just incredible to learn more about those relationships. Juli, as we seek to apply this conversation now to our own lives, what's an example of a possible next step forward?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, I think, Laura, a lot of us as married Christians, we think about biblical sexuality in terms of morality. In other words, let's keep the rules, let's obey God. And as we talked about in the faithfulness pillar, that certainly is a very critical part of how we honor God and each other within our sexual relationship. [00:44:30]    But the other pillars are all about maturity. I think you can be married for 10 years, 15 years, 20 years, 30 years or more as a married couple and never considered, what does it look like for us to mature in our sexual love? How can we say five years from now that we love each other more deeply sexually than we than we do right now? What do we need to work on? Which of these four pillars requires our immediate attention?    The book God, Sex, and Your Marriage can be helpful. We also are releasing a video curriculum and workbook for couples to go through this material that can be really helpful that you could do as couples or do in a small group. But things don't change unless we become intentional about changing them.    And so, you know, I think for all of us, we need that challenge to not just settle for the way things are, but to really ask the Lord to begin redeeming sex within our marriage, again, as part of that larger spiritual battle of reclaiming God's design for sex within our world. [00:45:42]    Laura Dugger: If part of this plan of ours for intentionality includes learning more from you, where can we go to do that?   Dr. Juli Slattery: You can find everything that we do at AuthenticIntimacy.com. So there's a podcast, blog, this book and other books and workbooks and small group opportunities. So you can find all of that at our website, Authentic Intimacy dot com.   Laura Dugger: Wonderful. We will link to that, as always, in the show notes for today's episode. Juli, you have been on multiple times, so you know we are called The Savvy Sauce because "savvy" is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so is my final question for you today. What is your savvy sauce? [00:46:26]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Well, I would have to go back and listen to the episodes I've been on before to see if I say the same one all the time. But my savvy sauce is just really spending time with the Lord and really trying to make sure I reserve that first hour of the day for connection with Him, for surrendering to Him, learning from Him, just wanting to do what he calls me to do. So that's my savvy sauce right there.   Laura Dugger: Well, you are always a calm and steady and helpful guest. As we opened this discussion, we talked about that passage from Matthew 9:37, where Jesus is saying the field is ripe for the harvest, but the laborers are few. So I just want to say thank you for being a willing and skilled helper. I'm so grateful to get to have you as my returning guest.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Oh, Laura, thank you. Thanks for giving me a chance to share. It's always a joy to talk to you. [00:47:31]    Laura Dugger: Likewise.    One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves.   This means there is absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a Savior.   But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news.   Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. [00:48:31] This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us.   Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.    So would you pray with me now? Heavenly Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.    If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him. You get the opportunity to live your life for Him. [00:49:31] And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you ready to get started?    First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes & Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible, and I love it. You can start by reading the Book of John.    Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps, such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.    We want to celebrate with you too, so feel free to leave a comment for us here if you did make a decision to follow Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.    Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." [00:50:36] The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.    If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

How can you be nice to your spouse when they aren't being so kind to you? John asks Greg for a biblical definition of what showing grace to your mate actually is. Then, Jim Daily talks to Brad and Marilyn Rhoads about why Christians need to model God's unconditional grace in how we treat our spouse. Find us online at focusonthefamily.com/marriagepodcast or call 1-800-A-FAMILY. Receive the book The Grace Marriage for your donation of any amount! Hope Restored Listen Anytime Loving the Story of Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2) Giving Your Spouse Grace Support This Show! If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

One of the best gifts you can give your spouse is grace, even when he or she doesn't deserve it. Brad and Marilyn Rhoads talk to Jim Daly about recognizing our own need for God's grace. Also, John asks the Smalley's how showing one another grace has made a difference in their relationship. Find us online at focusonthefamily.com/marriagepodcast or call 1-800-A-FAMILY. Receive the book The Grace Marriage for your donation of any amount! Hope Restored Listen Anytime Loving the Story of Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2) Giving Your Spouse Grace Support This Show! If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Gabrielle, Derek, and Scott discuss the importance and centrality of serving your spouse in marriage when life is full and busy and when you don't feel like it! Scriptures:Mark 10:45Gal 5:13Phil 2:1-11Phil 1:271 Cor 13:61 Peter 3:7 Resources:Book – Us in Mind: How Changing Your Thoughts Can Change Your Marriage, by Ted LoweMore Than Roommates – Episode 16 – The Importance of Empathy in Marriage (feat. Ted Lowe)Questions to Discuss:1. What is the thing around the house you hate to do?2. What is one thing your spouse hates to do around the house?3. What Does It Look Like to Serve Each Other in Your Marriage?

Have you ever had a moment where your spouse did something small—ignored a request, seemed distracted, didn't respond the way you hoped—and suddenly, you found yourself way more upset than you expected? Maybe you lashed out, shut down, or felt deeply hurt over something that, logically, didn't seem that big.It happens! And there's a reason this happens.In those moments, your reaction isn't just about your spouse—it's about something deeper. It's about a younger part of you, a part that learned long ago how to protect itself when love or attention felt uncertain.Maybe as a child, you had parents who were physically present but emotionally distant. Or maybe you grew up feeling like you had to fight to be seen and heard.Fast forward to today, and your nervous system still remembers. So when your spouse seems disconnected or unresponsive, your body reacts—not just to them, but to all the times you felt unseen before.In this week's episode of AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I'm talking about what's really happening when small conflicts turn into big emotional reactions—and how you can start recognizing and responding differently.In this episode, you'll learn:✅ Why certain interactions with your spouse feel more painful than they “should”✅ How to recognize when your inner child is reacting instead of your adult self✅ Simple steps to pause, reparent yourself, and shift into a response that creates connection instead of conflictThis is a powerful shift that can change the way you show up in your marriage—and help you move from frustration and resentment to deeper understanding and connection.Here's to seeing yourself—and your marriage—with new eyes. ❤️CBS News Interview: 6 Tips For A Healthy & Loving RelationshipUnlock deeper connection in your marriage with my free guide, Daily Prompts for Deeper Connection with Your Spouse—get it now! Start feeling more connected and loved in your marriage today with my free Reclaim More Love in Just 3 Days process. This process will have you learning how to shift your focus, in a healthy way, and nurture thoughts that build connection and transform how you feel about your marriage. More resources and how you can start the process of Awakening(YourTrue)You and being the partner who creates your best version of what marriage looks like for you: https://christinebongiovanni.com/Join my AwakenYou newsletter for weekly marriage tips and early announcements of upcoming offerings.Book your free Courageous Love Conversation here.InstagramFacebook

This week, we focused on Fighting for Your Marriage by learning how to handle conflict in a way that builds up rather than tears down. Conflict in marriage is unavoidable, but how we respond to it determines whether we are fighting in our marriage or for our marriage. If you would like to know more about MetaChurch and the movement of Jesus, we invite you to visit us at www.metachurch.tv.Support the show

Fighting for your FamilyWeek 3“Fighting for Your Marriage”Notes: https://www.bible.com/events/49389565

I recently had the incredible opportunity to be a guest on Gary Thomas' podcast. If you've been around Delight Your Marriage for a while, you know what a dear friend Gary has been to this ministry. Not only is he a best-selling author and speaker, but he's also been so generous in inviting us to share on his platform in the past. And this time? I got to be part of a panel alongside two truly amazing women: Juli Slattery—President and Co-Founder of Authentic Intimacy and author of several life-changing books, including God, Sex, & Your Marriage and Rethinking Sexuality. Debra Fileta—Creator of the #1 faith-based relationship advice blog TrueLoveDates.com and author of True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life and Married Sex: A Christian Couple's Guide to Reimagining Your Love (among many others). We came together for a powerful discussion about helping wives awaken to intimate pleasure—such an essential and often overlooked topic. The wisdom and insights from these women were just incredible, and I cannot wait for you to hear this conversation. Here were some key takeaways from our panel discussion: The Challenge of Awakening Sexual Fulfillment For so many women, the journey toward enjoying sex in marriage isn't a simple switch—it's a process. If you've spent years saying "no"—whether because of purity culture, past wounds, or just never learning that sex is a gift—it makes sense that "yes" doesn't come easily. And you are not alone in this! How Husbands Can Help Their Wives Awaken to Pleasure Men, you've likely never been discipled in how to help your wife step into her own sexual enjoyment. Many husbands enter marriage assuming their wife will naturally embrace sex, but the reality is, she may feel lost, hesitant, or even afraid. This is where your role as her safe place matters deeply. Here are some questions that Debra suggested as conversation starters on sex: What's something you're looking forward to in our sex life? What's something that makes you nervous or unsure? What beliefs about sex do you want to hold onto, and what do you want to let go of? Overcoming the Weight of Purity Culture Many women who "did everything right" and waited for marriage still find themselves struggling. Why? Because purity culture often framed sex as something to avoid, not as a gift to embrace. As Juli Slattery puts it, "Just because I waited, doesn't mean I know how to start." That's the truth. And if this is you, grace upon grace, my friend. Sexual wholeness isn't about following a list of dos and don'ts. It's about stepping into the fullness of what God has given and allowing Him to reframe any distorted views we carry. The Power of Emotional & Spiritual Connection Debra Fileta says, "What you do above the sheets paves the way for what happens under the sheets." I could not agree more. Emotional and spiritual safety fuels physical intimacy. Husbands, if your wife doesn't feel safe, known, and whole-heartedly cherished, her body won't naturally respond to you with desire. So, before you think about sex, think about: Playfulness in everyday life (it builds intimacy!) How you affirm and admire her body How well she feels known and cherished by you It's Not About You, It's About Her A massive shift for many husbands is realizing that sex in marriage isn't just about "getting my needs met." If your wife doesn't feel safe, it's no wonder intimacy feels like a duty rather than a desire. You have an opportunity to disciple your heart in a new way. Instead of seeing your wife as the "acceptable outlet" for your sexual needs, ask: "How can I be the safest place for her to enjoy intimacy?" When she feels safe, she will want to engage. Not out of obligation, but because she feels free to. How to Move Toward More Desire in Marriage Wives, rather than wondering and praying, "Why am I broken?" for not wanting intimacy, instead ask, "How can I cultivate a desire for intimacy?" Some ideas: Non-sexual sensual touch with no pressure Playfulness in your daily life (This is huge!) Embracing a "turning a dial" rather than "flipping a switch" approach to intimacy    Addressing Past Trauma & Emotional Wounds Even in strong marriages, past sexual trauma or unhealthy conditioning can affect intimacy. And let's be real: just having a great marriage doesn't mean sex will be effortless. For some, the body's response to past wounds will still show up. That's okay. It's part of the journey. Healing takes time, patience, and sometimes outside help. If this is part of your story, give yourself permission to process what's needed. The Role of Faith & Hope in Sexual Fulfillment God is a God of hope. If your marriage has felt disconnected, there is hope. If you've never truly enjoyed sexual pleasure, there is hope. Your story isn't over. Pursue wholeness—emotionally, spiritually, and physically—and trust that intimacy can be more fulfilling than you ever imagined. Final Thoughts Husbands: Emotional and spiritual intimacy first, pleasure follows. Wives: You are not broken. Your pleasure matters. Both: Intimacy is a journey, not a destination. Keep taking steps, and trust that God is working in it all. Friend, you are not alone. Your marriage can grow, your desire can awaken, and your intimacy can thrive. Keep leaning in, keep growing, and keep trusting that God has more for you than you even realize. Be blessed! Love,   Belah & Team  

We've been talking about sexual experience for many years now, and we figured it was time to discuss why sex even matters in marriage? What's the point? Sponsor It's Choose Your Promo month at Share the Soap! Pick either: Celebration box, a quarterly subscription box filled with uniquely curated items only available for that box as well as proven customer favorites. Get $10 off your first box with code FCWCELBOX1! The subscription is open now through February 21 and ships on February 28. It's the perfect way to prepare for date night while treating yourself. Sensual Set, which sets the mood for date night or any night. Perfect for Valentine's Day! Take $10 off with our code, FCWCOUPLE, through February 28. From the Bible God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” Genesis 1:28 Adam made love to [yada] his wife Eve, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Cain. She said, “With the help of the Lord I have brought forth a man.” Genesis 4:1 May your fountain be blessed,     and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—     may her breasts satisfy you always,     may you ever be intoxicated with her love. Proverbs 5:18-19 [He] I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride;     I have gathered my myrrh with my spice. I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey;     I have drunk my wine and my milk. [Friends] Eat, friends, and drink;     drink your fill of love. Song of Songs 5:1 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Genesis 2:24 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:7-9 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. Genesis 2:25 For your Maker is your husband— the Lord Almighty is his name— the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth. Isaiah 54:5 As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you. Isaiah 62:5 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. Ephesians 5:31-32 Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Revelation 19:7 Resources Episode 171: What's So Great About Sex? What Are the Real Purposes of Sex? | Hot, Holy & Humorous Touchstone: Sex Is Fun, Part 1 | The Forgiven Wife Boom-Boom Playtime: Sex Is Fun, Part 2 | The Forgiven Wife Supernatural Sex: Spiritual Dimension of Libido for Low-Drive Wives | OysterBed7 Episode 147: God, Sex, and Your Marriage, with Dr. Juli Slattery Episode 114: Pursuing Playfulness in Sexual Intimacy Sex Is Like Rose-Colored Glasses | Hot, Holy & Humorous Episode 50: Happily, with Kevin A. Thompson Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work by Kevin A. Thompson 8 Ways to Stay Intimate Even When Life Gets in the Way of Sex | The Forgiven Wife Episode 125: Is Sex a Need? "Sexual Morality," Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis Hope for Wives Podcast (with Bonny Burns) Our Webinars (6 available, each $10 or less!) Thanks for joining us at the virtual kitchen table for another great chat! If you could, we'd appreciate you leaving a rating and/or review so that others can find the show. Please be sure to check out our website and webinars at forchristianwives.com. And visit our individual ministry pages for more resources as well: Strong Wives - Bonny Burns Honeycomb & Spice - Chris Taylor Hot, Holy & Humorous - J. Parker  

A strong, thriving marriage can bring immense joy and happiness to your life -- but a struggling one can create unnecessary pain and misery. In this episode, Greg and Rachel Denning unlock the secret to "marriage magic" that can be the foundation of true happiness and fulfillment.  They share how to break free from marriage mediocrity by setting high expectations for your relationship and making intentional efforts to create something extraordinary. They dive into important topics like conflict resolution, overcoming self-sabotage, and embracing challenges as opportunities for growth, all aimed at helping couples build a deeper, more meaningful connection. Drawing from their experiences as parents of seven children and globe-trotters, Greg and Rachel emphasize the power of investing in your relationship—whether through carving out mental space for intimacy or taking regular retreats to reconnect. They discuss the value of having a shared vision for the future and the impact of coaching and intentional effort in maintaining a healthy marriage. The Dennings also focus on breaking generational patterns and raising the bar for what marriage can be. If you're ready to create a thriving marriage that lays the groundwork for an extraordinary family life, this episode is packed with practical advice and inspiration. Greg and Rachel's message is clear: with the right mindset and commitment, you can unlock the marriage magic that will transform your relationship and your family's future. RESOURCES: Let us help you in your extraordinary family life journey. JOIN US! Reconnect with your spouse on this Scottish Castle Couples VIP Trip Follow us on Instagram: ⁠@worldschoolfamily⁠ or ⁠@greg.denning⁠ Gather with us at the ⁠World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort⁠ in Portugal Read our reviews here: https://podcast.extraordinaryfamilylife.com/reviews/ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message  Watch more episodes on Marriage and Intimacy: #167 How to Get Your Spouse on Board -- Plus Why Your Marriage Needs a 'Breaking Point #192 Everything in Life Gets Easier & Smoother When You Can Communicate Better. Here's How to Do It #203 Creating a Real Life 'happily Ever After' Marriage (It's Not a Pipe Dream) #221Specific Strategies & Tools to Make Your Marriage Good, Better, Great & Extraordinary #227 Babe, I Want to Be Able to Talk to You About Anything -- Let's Listen & Discuss This #237 The Stability of Your Family Life Depends on the Stability of Your Marriage #254 What to Do When Your Spouse is Not 'showing Up' or Investing in Your Extraordinary Marriage/life #256 How to Become More Capable So You Can Do the Work to Achieve Your Extraordinary Life, Marriage & Family #261 How to Have the Hard Talks With Your Spouse About Money (+ Teach Your Kids Healthy Mindsets About It) #262 Improve Communication With Your Spouse & Process Emotions to Build an Extraordinary Life & Marriage #263 My Spouse Doesn't Respect Me, I Crave Intimacy & Feel Lonely in My Marriage #270 So You Want to Change Your Spouse? Here's How You Can Have a Positive Influence for Change in Your Relationship #293 Transforming Marriage Dynamics: How Life Coaching Can Build a Stronger Relationship ⁠#148 What Wives Need to Know About Husbands' (Sex Drive) and What Men Need to Understand About Themselves⁠ ⁠#150 The Sex-quel. Follow Up Sex Episode With Rachel Denning⁠ ⁠#151 What Husbands NEED to Know About Their Wives (sex & intimacy)⁠ ⁠#174 Marriage Q&A: Intellectual Conversations, Over-Helping, & Why This Famous Sexpert is WRONG⁠ ⁠#215 A Message to Husbands: How to Actually Listen to Your Wife⁠ ⁠#224 How (& WHY) to Have Sex 3-6 Times a Week EVEN with Kids, Businesses, Homeschool, Jobs, Activities, and More #253 Sex is a NEED for an Extraordinary Marriage #268 I'm Tired of Being a Lonely “Roommate With Benefits” for My Husband #273 I'm Tired of Being a Roommate ‘without Benefits' With My Wife! (Aka Why Women Don't Want Sex)

An insightful conversation on the complexities of relationships and divorce featuring Dr. Galena Rhoades, a leading psychologist and research professor at the University of Denver. The episode covers a variety of topics including the science behind what keeps couples together, the importance of commitment and communication, and the controversial topic of infidelity and its recovery process. The podcast includes engaging segments like 'Overrated or Underrated' and 'They Said It,' where Evan and producer Dave delve into trending topics and quotes about relationships. Dr. Rhoades offers research-backed truths and practical advice, making this a must-listen for anyone interested in understanding the dynamics of love and divorce.   Topics   01:35 February Excitement and Super Bowl Talk 03:01 Valentine's Day Discussion 04:12 Docket Items: Divorce and Cheating 06:26 Bill Gates' Divorce Regret 12:10 Overrated or Underrated: Legal and Fun Topics 22:03 Interview with Dr. Galena Rhoades 26:27 Research on Cohabitation and Divorce 28:00 The Sliding vs. Deciding Theory 30:04 Designing the Ideal Psychological Study 31:38 Healing After Betrayal in Relationships 33:49 The Phases of Recovery from Infidelity 38:53 The Myths of Love and Relationships 41:49 Impact of Family Background on Relationships 44:14 Key Components of Thriving Relationships 47:45 Insights from 'Fighting for Your Marriage' 50:35 Analyzing Historical Relationships 52:52 They Said It: Reflections on Love and Commitment 57:40 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Have you ever sat across from your spouse on a date night and felt… nothing? Like you should be enjoying yourselves, but instead, the conversation feels forced, surface-level, or stuck in logistics?Or maybe you've stopped doing date nights altogether because, honestly, what's the point if they don't feel special anymore?If this sounds familiar, you're not alone. Many couples quietly struggle with feeling disconnected, assuming that if conversations aren't flowing naturally, it must mean they've lost interest in each other. But what if that's not true?What if the problem isn't that the connection is gone… but that you just need a new way to find it again?In this week's episode of AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I'm sharing why engaging, meaningful conversations don't just happen—they're created. I'll help you see why your date nights might feel dull or distant, and most importantly, how to change that.If you miss having date nights that leave you feeling seen, heard, and excited about your marriage again, you won't want to miss this episode.Your next date night could feel completely different with just a few small shifts. Let's make it one you look forward to.CBS News Interview: 6 Tips For A Healthy & Loving RelationshipUnlock deeper connection in your marriage with my free guide, Daily Prompts for Deeper Connection with Your Spouse—get it now! More resources and how you can start the process of Awakening(YourTrue)You and being the partner who creates your best version of what marriage looks like for you: https://christinebongiovanni.com/Join my AwakenYou newsletter for weekly marriage tips and early announcements of upcoming offerings.Book your free Courageous Love Conversation here.InstagramFacebook

What a great conversation today on Living a Legacy Life with Chelsea Damon, author of the book: I Thought This Would Make Me Happy, How to Fight Less, Forgive Faster, and Cultivate Joy in Your Marriage. Married or not, this podcast is for any serious follower of Jesus. Why? Becasue we are all prone to find our joy and satisfaction and identity in anything but God and yet we get disappointed, disenchanted, and discouraged—maybe all in the same day and at the same time—because we forget that we were made to find our rest in Him, period.  Chelsea knew from an early age that she wanted to be married and she always had someone to lean on. What she didn't know was that leaning too hard on one person, even a great husband, didn't help her know who she was nor flourish as God's child. Married young, she was determined not to be one of those divorce statistics but it wasn't until the Lord showed her that she had made marriage an idol that she began to feel the freedom to be herself and help her relationship flourish instead of trying to control all the outcomes. Get your free Self-Awareness Guide HERE (how to know how selfish we are!) And, no, not a good idea to take it for your spouse! Chelsea will be hosting a giveaway of this great book all week long. Be sure to comment to be entered. Even if you aren't married, you know someone who is and might benefit from a gift of her book.  Chelsea Damon is not only the author of I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: How to Fight Less, Forgive Faster, and Cultivate Joy in Your Marriage, but also, Together with Christ: A Dating Couple's Devotional: 52 Devotions and Bible Studies to Nurture Your Relationship. She is also the author of chelseadamon.com, a website where moms and wives are encouraged in healthy, Christ-centered lives and relationships.   Damon and her husband Josh met while attending college, where they grew in their faith and dated for three years. They were married on the windy coast of Washington in 2013. Throughout their dating and marriage relationship and into parenthood, they've been learning what it means to live loving God and loving others in a self-love world. Today, the Damons have three biological children, are foster parents, and spend their time looking for new places to hike and explore beautiful South Carolina. Social Media:  https://www.instagram.com/chelsealeighdamon https://www.facebook.com/LivingTheSweetWife/ https://twitter.com/damonchels   Some gems from our conversation: A good way not to fight is to begin the conversation with: "I'm not mad about this but . . ." I was fearful to be pegged as a doormat, so I went out of my way to over control. We are quick to identify the faults in another but give ourselves a little more grace than we are willing to give. I had an unhealthy need to have "that person" in my life to make me find my place in the world. I was loving to get something back and that isn't way love is supposed to work. I needed to change where I find my security—from a person and our relationship—to God and my place in his family. It's okay to make yourself a little uncomfortable to show the love of Christ to those around me.  We need to take a good look at ourselves instead of judging how another could improve so that we are getting our needs met.  I had to learn the skill of speaking up and thinking critically without living in the fear of destroying the relationship.      

Dr. Juli Slattery recognizes that many couples possess a poor foundation for understanding God’s design for intimacy — that our sexual relationship is a metaphor for the intimacy God longs to have with each one of us. Therefore, God is very interested in our sexuality and, in fact, designed sex for our pleasure. She encourages married couples to have “covenant love” rather than contractual love. (Part 2 of 2) Receive the book God, Sex and Your Marriage plus a free audio download of the broadcast "Rethinking Godly Sexuality in Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Plus, receive member-exclusive benefits when you make a recurring gift today. Your monthly support helps families thrive. Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

Dr. Juli Slattery recognizes that many couples possess a poor foundation for understanding God’s design for intimacy — that our sexual relationship is a metaphor for the intimacy God longs to have with each one of us. Therefore, God is very interested in our sexuality and, in fact, designed sex for our pleasure. She encourages married couples to have “covenant love” rather than contractual love. (Part 1 of 2) Receive the book God, Sex and Your Marriage plus a free audio download of the broadcast "Rethinking Godly Sexuality in Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Plus, receive member-exclusive benefits when you make a recurring gift today. Your monthly support helps families thrive. Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

In this episode of the Fight for Your Marriage podcast, Lori interviews Mike and Leigh Ann, who share how God has restored their marriage and is now using them to minister to others.   Mike and Leigh Ann thought they had they had a strong marriage. Leigh Ann was unaware of a secret that Mike had carried with him for decades. One secret led to another, and on the eve of their 28th anniversary, Leigh Ann's world came crumbling down as the truth was exposed.   In this episode, we talk about:   How accountability played a role in recovery The importance of being honest with others about our secret sins How to support loved ones who are struggling with addiction How to forgive someone who has hurt you   Whether you are battling addiction or trying to support someone who is, this conversation will give you hope and practical wisdom as you seek God's power to heal and restore.   We appreciate your feedback. If this episode touches you, please leave us a five-star rating and review, helping us reach new listeners with hope for their marriage. You can also subscribe to our show on YouTube, Spotify, or iTunes.   Forgiveness Bundle   Pure Desire Ministries

*DISCLAIMER* This episode is intended for adults   252. Maximizing Sexual Connection as Newlyweds to Long Term Marriages and Recovering from a Sexless Marriage with Dr. Clifford & Joyce Penner   Ephesians 5:21 (NIV) Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.   Questions and Topics We Cover: What are a couple of your most important tips for newlyweds? What are your favorite recommendations to share with couples who want to be proactive and enhance their sexual intimacy, even if things are currently going pretty well? Will you define what constitutes a sexless marriage and share  any trends you've seen over the years?   Thank You to Our Sponsor:  Sam Leman Eureka   Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner are best known for their pioneer work in encouraging people of all faiths to connect their sexuality with their belief system ─ helping them embrace sex as good and of God. Dr. Clifford is a licensed clinical psychologist and Joyce is a registered nurse and clinical nurse specialist. They are highly respected authors and speakers, in addition to being parents and grandparents.    Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner's Website   At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.    Books By Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner: Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women The Married Guy's Guide to Great Sex Restoring the Pleasure The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment Sex FAQ We Didn't Have Time to Cover Today  Information on Pelvic Pain    Previous Savvy Sauce Episodes with Dr. Clifford & Joyce Penner: Easy Changes to Enhance Your Sexual Intimacy in Marriage with Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner    Maximizing Sexual Intimacy During the Three Most Challenging Phases of Marriage with Christian Sex Therapist Pioneers, Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner   Additional Previous Episodes on Sexual Intimacy on The Savvy Sauce: Fostering a Fun, Healthy Sex Life with your Spouse with Dr. Jennifer Konzen  Ways to Deepen Your Intimacy in Marriage with Dr. Douglas Rosenau  Ten Common Questions About Sex, Shared Through a Biblical Worldview with Dr. Michael Sytsma Hope For Treating Pelvic Pain with Tracey LeGrand Treatment for Sexual Issues with Certified Sex Therapist, Emma Schmidt Talking With Your Kids About Sex with Brian and Alison Sutter Natural Aphrodisiacs with Christian Certified Sex Therapist, Dr. Douglas Rosenau Healthy Sexuality, Emotional Intelligence, and Parenting Children with Autism with Counselor, Lauren Dack Pain and Joy in Sexual Intimacy with Psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist, Dr. Jessica McCleese Identifying and Fighting Human Trafficking with Dr. Jeff Waibel Bridging the Gap Between Military and Civilian Families with Licensed Professional Counselor, Cuthor, Podcaster, and 2015 Military Spouse of the Year, Corie Weathers Enjoying a God-Honoring, Healthy Sex Life with Your Spouse with Certified Sex Therapist and Ordained Minister, Dr. Michael Sytsma Enjoying Parenting and Managing Conversations About Sex with Certified Sex Therapist and Author, Dr. Jennifer Konzen Conflict Resolution, Infidelity, and Infertility with Licensed Psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist, Dr. Jessica McCleese Hormones and Body Image with Certified Sex Therapist, Vickie George Passion Pursuit with Dr. Juli Slattery Female Orgasm with Sue Goldstein Erectile Dysfunction, Premature Ejaculation, and Treatments Available with Dr. Irwin Goldstein Turn Ons, Turn Offs, and Savoring Sex in Marriage with Dr. Jennifer Konzen Desire Discrepancy in Marriage with Dr. Michael Sytsma Answering Listener's Questions About Sex with Kelli Willard Anatomy of an Affair with Dave Carder Supernatural Restoration Story with Bob and Audrey Meisner Healthy Minds, Marriages, and Sex Lives with Drs. Scott and Melissa Symington Female Pornography Addiction and Meaningful Recovery with Crystal Renaud Day Building Lasting Relationships with Clarence and Brenda Shuler Healthy Ways for Females to Increase Sexual Enjoyment with Tracey LeGrand Pornography Healing for Spouses with Geremy Keeton Sexual Sin Recovery for You and Your Spouse (Part Two) Personal Development and Sexual Wholeness with Dr. Sibylle Georgianna  Our Brain's Role in Sexual Intimacy with Angie Landry Discovering God's Design for Romance with Sharon Jaynes Sex in Marriage and Its Positive Effects with Francie Winslow, Part 1 Science and Art of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage, Part 2 Making Love in Marriage with Debra Fileta Mutually Pleasing Sex in Marriage with Gary Thomas Sex Series: God's Design and Warnings for Sex: An Interview with Mike Novotny Sex Series: Enhancing Female Pleasure and Enjoyment of Sex: An Interview with Dr. Jennifer Degler Sex Series Orgasmic Potential, Pleasure, and Friendship: An Interview with Bonny Burns  Sex Series: Sex Series: Healthy Self, Healthy Sex: An Interview with Gaye Christmus Sex Series: Higher Sexual Desire Wife: An Interview with J Parker Sex Series: Six Pillars of Intimacy with Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo 215 Enriching Women's Sexual Function, Part One with Dr. Kris Christiansen 216 Enriching Women's Sexual Function, Part Two with Dr. Kris Christiansen 217 Tween/Teen Females: How to Navigate Changes during Puberty with Dr. Jennifer Degler 218 Secrets of Sex and Marriage: Interview with Dr. Michael Sytsma 222 Pornography: Protecting Children and Personal Healing, Victory, and Recovery in Christ with Sam Black Special Patreon Release: Holy Sex: An Interview with Dr. Juli Slattery Special Patreon Release: His Desires and Her Desires in the Bedroom with Dr. Jennifer Konzen 224 Surprising Discoveries of Sex in Marriage: An Interview with Shaunti Feldhahn 227 Resolving Conflict in Marriage with Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo  Patreon 28 Re-Release: Protecting Your Marriage Against Unfaithfulness with Dave Carder Patreon 23 Her Desires and His Desires in the Bedroom with Dr. Jennifer Konzen Patreon 26 Holy Sex with Dr. Juli Slattery Patreon 28 Protecting Your Marriage Against Unfaithfulness with Dave Carder Patreon 29 Remaining Sexually Engaged Through The Years with Dr. Michael Sytsma Patreon 49: Story of Healing from Sexual Betrayal in Marriage: An Interview with Bonny Burns Patreon 52 God, Sex, and Your Marriage with Dr. Juli Slattery   Connect with The Savvy Sauce Our Website, Instagram or Facebook    Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Are you curious how prayer can come alive in your marriage? Are you and your spouse seeking ways to grow in spiritual intimacy? Join Greg & Erin this week as they sit down with author Jodie Berndt to talk about the benefits of praying together. Later, we hear the love story of a blended family. Then, we answer a question from a listener who wants to know she can encourage her husband's new faith. Click here to receive Jodie's book, Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage, for a gift of any amount! Click here or text the word "PRAY" to 32728 to sign up for the 10-Day Couples Prayer Challenge! If you and your spouse are in need of counseling, click here to sign up for a free counseling consultation from Focus on the Family Click here to access Jodie's Marriage Prayer Calendar! Click here for free resources on remarriage & blended families from Focus on the Family Donate Now! We'd love to hear from you! Visit our Homepage to leave us a voicemail.

251. Wintering and Embracing Holy Hygge with Jamie Erickson   John 14:3 NIV "And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am."   When she's not curating memories, hoarding vintage books, or homeschooling her five kids, Jamie Erickson can be found encouraging and equipping a growing tribe of mothers all across the globe on the Mom to Mom podcast, through her blog The Unlikely Homeschool, at national conferences, and in her book Homeschool Bravely: How to Squash Doubt, Trust God, and Teach Your Child With Confidence.   Jamie Erickson's Website   Questions and Topics We Discuss: What are ways that practicing hygge in our outer life can affect our inner life? You've given seven broad categories for holy hygge living, but let's do a deeper dive into just two, specifically: Hospitality and Atmosphere. Will you share a sampling of other tips for practical hygge living?   Article Mentioned from The Savvy Sauce Website: Decluttering Our Homes and Our Minds   Other Episodes Related to This Topic from The Savvy Sauce: 47. Relationships and Opportunities that Arise from Using Your Gifts with Founder of Neighbor's Table, Sarah Harmeyer   178. Fresh Take on Hospitality with Jaime Farrell   Top Ten from 2023: #2 Tremendous Testimony and Adding Spark into Your Marriage with David & Terri Sumlin   Top Ten from 2023: #3 Making Your Home a Place of Love and Peace With Late Author and International Speaker, Devi Titus   Thank You to Our Sponsor: The Sue Neihouser Team   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Jade Warshaw, a co-host of The Ramsey Show, shares the early downward spiral she took with her husband deep into debt and how they eventually got back on their feet. Hear the foundational steps to find financial freedom and learn to become unified financially as a married couple. Receive the book Money is Not a Math Problem and an audio download of "Healthy Budgeting Habits for Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

Dave and Ashley Willis help husbands and wives rediscover God's design for a "naked marriage" - where they can be emotionally, spiritually and physically vulnerable and transparent with each other. They share their own love story and describe how “love is not enough” to sustain a lifelong marriage; couples need to commit to serving and sacrificing for each other. They also talk about dealing with the past, balancing marriage and motherhood, financial struggles, and being faithful "in sickness and in health." Receive the book 7 Days to a Naked Marriage Bundle and the audio download of the broadcast "How to Experience Great Intimacy and Love in Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Your Gift DOUBLES to Give Families Hope! Save 2X the marriages and families this Christmas with your life-changing gift today! Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.

Dave and Ashley Willis help husbands and wives rediscover God's design for a "naked marriage" - where they can be emotionally, spiritually and physically vulnerable and transparent with each other. They share their own love story and describe how “love is not enough” to sustain a lifelong marriage; couples need to commit to serving and sacrificing for each other. They also talk about dealing with the past, balancing marriage and motherhood, financial struggles, and being faithful "in sickness and in health." Receive the book 7 Days to a Naked Marriage Bundle and the audio download of the broadcast "How to Experience Great Intimacy and Love in Your Marriage" for your donation of any amount! Your Gift DOUBLES to Give Families Hope! Save 2X the marriages and families this Christmas with your life-changing gift today! Get More Episode Resources If you've listened to any of our podcasts, please give us your feedback.