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CraftLit - Serialized Classic Literature for Busy Book Lovers
Ep. 686: Cranford | Chapter 8 Book talk begins at 15:54 Lady Glenmire (a real baron's widow!) is in town, and the Cranford ladies can't decide whether to curtsey or completely ignore her—Mrs. Jamieson prefers the latter. --------------------------------------------------------------- 00:00 Episode start 1:55 - MAY RAFFLE - from Rebecca S (Of Book it with Becca) 2:25 - Send your crafty videos: 4:45 - Plum Deluxe Tea-CraftLit's Discount Code! 5:05 - , 5:35 - 8:01 - ELSIE BLOUSE on WEARING HISTORY 8:50 - . Hope that helps! 10:40 - And from Donna Schmidt 13:48-Anya's voice mail BOOK TALK—Re-hash Notes 15:57 - Last week Visiting - RE-LISTEN Pre-hash Notes 17:00 - Your Ladyship. Ended with Cherry Brandy (ha!) And Mrs Jamieson blurting out to everyone she would be hosting her SIL Lady Glenmire soon. 17:50 - shared subscription to newspaper. SOME REALLY CLEVER Austen-like wordplay in today's chapter. A lot of fun! Characters in *Cranford* (Updated for Chs. 6–8) 18:25 - County families—the landed gentry in the county - you know…the only important people in the area :( Miss Pole “I'll think of something to say back to her… tonight…”—nothing changes HA! 18:40 Peerage - prob refers to Burke's Peerage and Baronetage (first pub was 1826!!!) Only 16 Scottish peers were SELECTED to sit in the House of Lords; 19:00 -comparison to Job - God takes everything from him then torments him some more. 20:40 - The Arley's - we learned that Lady Arley shopped at Betty Barker's milliner shop last week and was part of why the shop eventually only served the well-to-do of Cranford ——which lets us know that there WAS a well-to-do set and our ladies are not they! 22:00 - Fourth at pool - another card game 22:45 - Sedulously-Dedication, diligence 22:55 - “thought you might want a description of Mrs Smith, Her being a bride”. B/c often a bride's 1st appearance in society after honeymoon she wore her dress. 23:15 - ***nipped up her petticoats*** - 25:10 - Mr Milliner - introduce him to listeners - ignored back door (GASP) 25:15 - candle lighters as an excise LOL ALSO what's she making them out of?!??? - EXCELLENT WAY TO USE OLD BILLS & LETTERS! Assumption no one will go LOL - Poole's rationalization to go to party
What is the true meaning of accountability? In this episode, Squirrel and Jeffrey share a real-life story that illustrates how it's often misunderstood. Listen now to learn why it's not about blame or punishment, but about 'rendering an account' - in other words, sharing reasoning and decisions transparently. SHOW LINKS: Links: - Previous episode on accountability: https://itrevolution.com/articles/accountability-leaders-are-accountable-too/ -------------------------------------------------- You'll find free videos and practice material, plus our book Agile Conversations, at agileconversations.com And we'd love to hear any thoughts, ideas, or feedback you have about the show: email us at info@agileconversations.com -------------------------------------------------- About Your Hosts Douglas Squirrel and Jeffrey Fredrick joined forces at TIM Group in 2013, where they studied and practised the art of management through difficult conversations. Over a decade later, they remain united in their passion for growing profitable organisations through better communication. Squirrel is an advisor, author, keynote speaker, coach, and consultant, and he's helped over 300 companies of all sizes make huge, profitable improvements in their culture, skills, and processes. You can find out more about his work here: douglassquirrel.com/index.html Jeffrey is Vice President of Engineering at ION Analytics, Organiser at CITCON, the Continuous Integration and Testing Conference, and is an accomplished author and speaker. You can connect with him here: www.linkedin.com/in/jfredrick/
"Guard your consciousness because our consciousness is our most most precious thing that we have."Welcome to the grand finale of the Bewitched series. Robyn and I wrap up this intense journey, reflecting on lessons learned and closing the book. We discuss the ethical responsibility we felt and the personal cost of sharing these stories.I share 11 patterns of manipulation I tracked across guest stories, explaining how they relate to childhood relational trauma and exploiting "soft spots", like creating trauma bonds and gaslighting. Robyn adds personality insights, contrasting the Dark Tetrad with the Light Triad. We touch on how traits like openness and agreeableness, combined with trauma, may make accomplished, intuitive women susceptible. Discernment is crucial.We also address the question of why Betty's identity was not revealed. We're excited to continue podcasting, collaborating on new content focusing on ethics, integrity, and standards in the healing and spiritual leadership space. We want to thank all of the women who wanted to come forward with their stories and experiences. And also, everyone who showed their support, caring and interest in the series. You rock!This episode is an invitation to safeguard your consciousness, become aware of red flags, do your deeper work, and keep the conversation going so these patterns don't happen in this way again.TODAY'S HIGHLIGHTS(00:00) Intro(00:52) Closing the Book on Bewitched(02:32) Programs, Offerings and Discounts(06:43) The Grand Finale Lightning Round(13:46) The Ethical Imperative: Why We Had to Speak(19:53) Uncovering the Patterns of Manipulation(22:25) Pattern 1 - Your Trauma, Her Profit: The Trauma Bond Tactic(27:25) Patterns 2-4: Bait, Whiplash & The Confusion Matrix(34:12) Patterns 5-7: Energetic Control, Isolation & Loyalty(39:44) Patterns 8-9: Projected Copying & Banishing Dissent(42:52) Pattern 10: You're So Special! (Exploiting Your Unmet Needs)(49:38) Pattern 11: Problems Without Solutions(51:57) Personality Insights: The Dark Tetrad vs. Light Triad(01:02:57) Open, Agreeable & Easily Hypnotized: The Painful Familiar(01:07:13) Closing the Chapter on "Betty" & Revoking Validation(01:13:09) Looking Ahead: Ethics, Integrity & New Projects(01:20:39) Final Blessing: Guard Your Consciousness**WAYS TO ENTER MY WORLD** When you leave a review of the podcast, send us a screenshot and we'll send you a $250 credit, you can apply to anything else in my world. The Metamorphosis starts its next round at the end of the month. This is my groundbreaking, flagship program, and the path to discover your deeper purpose. Start making money doing what you love.The Minimorphosis Learn my Simple 5 Step Inner Child Healing Process to dissolve the one core wound that slows down your growth. Use code HEAL at checkout to purchase for only $33!The Metamorphosis MethodCONTACT ROBYN drrobynmckay.com InstagramListen to She{ology}CONTACT ALYSE@alyse_breathesalysebreathes.cominfo@alysebreathes.com
AN 8.41 When the sabbath is observed by following the eight precepts, one lives for that day like the perfected ones. Such a sabbath is glorious. AN 8.42 When the sabbath is observed by following the eight precepts, one lives for that day like the perfected ones. The benefits are explained at length. AN 8.44 The Buddha teaches the layman Vāseṭṭha that when the sabbath is observed by following the eight precepts, one lives for that day like the perfected ones. Vāseṭṭha exclaims that such a practice would be widely beneficial. AN 8.46 Some “Agreeable” gods put on a display of music and dance for Venerable Anuruddha, but he is not impressed. He then asks the Buddha how women are reborn in such a heaven. AN 8.47 The Buddha teaches the laywoman Visākhā eight qualities through which a woman may be reborn among the Agreeable gods. AN 8.48 The Buddha teaches the housewife Nakulamātā eight qualities through which a woman may be reborn among the Agreeable gods. AN 8.49 The Buddha teaches the laywoman Visākhā four qualities through which a woman succeeds in this life, and four through which she succeeds in the next. AN 8.50 The Buddha teaches the mendicants four qualities through which a woman succeeds in this life, and four through which she succeeds in the next.
Have you ever wondered “If I wanted to change my personality, would I be able to?” Or have you ever wondered if it was possible for someone else to truly change their personality? This was a question that today’s guest wondered about herself and so she went on a journey to find out whether it was really possible to change your entire personality! Joining the podcast today is Olga Khazan. Olga is a writer for The Atlantic, and the author of the new book Me, But Better: The Science and Promise of Personality Change. Olga spent a year experimenting with her own personality to see if she could become more extroverted, a lot less neurotic, and a little more agreeable. We speak about: Exactly why you might like to change your personality How much of our personality is ‘hard wired’ The ‘big 5’ personality traits: extroversion, neuroticism, agreeableness, conscientiousness, openness. How different aspects of our personality affects our relationships Making friends when you’re not particularly extroverted Can you change someone else’s personality? Do certain life stages encourage a personality change? What things can you do to change your personality? You can get Olga's new book Me, But Better You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Negotiate Anything: Negotiation | Persuasion | Influence | Sales | Leadership | Conflict Management
Want to share your thoughts? Fill out our listener form Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company In this enlightening episode of Negotiate Anything, host Kwame Christian, Esq., M.A. sits down with renowned negotiation expert Ed Brodow to explore powerful strategies for mastering any deal. Drawing from his extensive experience and bestselling book, Negotiation Boot Camp, Ed emphasizes the importance of being assertive and challenging everything in the negotiation process. Through captivating real-life examples, he demonstrates how to effectively defend your interests and establish a win-win framework. Listeners will also gain keen insights into the critical moments when it's best to walk away from a deal, ensuring they never settle for less than they deserve. What Will Be Covered: The concept of "negotiation consciousness" and why it's vital for successful negotiations. Real-life examples of effective negotiation tactics, including knowing when to challenge and when to walk away. The difference between being assertive and being aggressive, and why it matters in ensuring a fair deal. Connect With Ed Buy Negotiation Bootcamp https://www.brodow.com/ Follow Ed Brodow on LinkedIn Contact ANI Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn The Ultimate Negotiation Guide Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race! Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life! What's in it for you? Exclusive Advice: Gain insights from top negotiation experts. Community Support: Connect with a like-minded community focused on growth. Personal & Professional Growth: Unlock strategies to enhance every aspect of your life. You deserve to negotiate more of the best things in life, and now you can! Don't wait—be the first in line to experience this game-changing resource.
Want to share your thoughts? Fill out our listener form Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company In this enlightening episode of Negotiate Anything, host Kwame Christian, Esq., M.A. sits down with renowned negotiation expert Ed Brodow to explore powerful strategies for mastering any deal. Drawing from his extensive experience and bestselling book, Negotiation Boot Camp, Ed emphasizes the importance of being assertive and challenging everything in the negotiation process. Through captivating real-life examples, he demonstrates how to effectively defend your interests and establish a win-win framework. Listeners will also gain keen insights into the critical moments when it's best to walk away from a deal, ensuring they never settle for less than they deserve. What Will Be Covered: The concept of "negotiation consciousness" and why it's vital for successful negotiations. Real-life examples of effective negotiation tactics, including knowing when to challenge and when to walk away. The difference between being assertive and being aggressive, and why it matters in ensuring a fair deal. Connect With Ed Buy Negotiation Bootcamp https://www.brodow.com/ Follow Ed Brodow on LinkedIn Contact ANI Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn The Ultimate Negotiation Guide Click here to buy your copy of How To Have Difficult Conversations About Race! Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life! What's in it for you? Exclusive Advice: Gain insights from top negotiation experts. Community Support: Connect with a like-minded community focused on growth. Personal & Professional Growth: Unlock strategies to enhance every aspect of your life. You deserve to negotiate more of the best things in life, and now you can! Don't wait—be the first in line to experience this game-changing resource.
00:00 Intro01:10 What your body consumes02:22 Mental Health03:33 Hang up your ego04:16 Taking action05:08 Agreeable crisis06:06 Reflection
In this episode, Nick and Carol help an Australian who is bored of Australia, assist with a wedding anniversary and with a first time buyer.
Analyze how you’re doing spiritually by how you’re loving others.
Don't have time for terrible
Men have the idea that women are naturally more agreeable than men. Patriarchy at its finest.
This is the latest episode of a series I started last month about great quotes from an outstanding book called "Organize Your Team Today," by Dr. Jason Selk and Tom Bartow. I learned so much from this book, and you will, too. I highly recommend you pick it up. You can also find it under the title, "Lead Any Team to Win."Last week, I talked about the second half of Chapter 4 - "Turning Team Chemistry into Team Cohesion." Today, we move to Chapter 5 - "It's Okay to Disagree: Just Don't Be Disagreeable." This became the longest episode of the series so far, but that's because there is so much good stuff in this chapter.For more information to help you on your road to becoming your best, check us out at SlamDunkSuccess.com or email me at scott@slamdunksuccess.com.As always, our background music is "Dance in the Sun" by Krisztian Vass.
Happy Southern Baptist Convention Eve! Over the next few days Southern Baptist Churches from around the country will come together in Indianapolis and will debate about key issues involving our churches. Recently Ben preached a sermon from Romans 14 and we thought it would be perfect to publish it on The Glass House. It is not uncommon for christians to be passionate about their positions and opinions and not agree with one another. We hope this episode encourages every listener to keep the most important things at the center: the resurrection of Jesus, the power of the Gospel, and the unifying grace that God gives to all of us. If you would like more on this topic, a few Lifeway authors wrote an incredible book, World On Fire: Walking in the Wisdom of Christ When Everyone's Fighting About Everything. Check it out! Thanks for listening and sharing with a friend. SHOW LINKS:-Leave Ben & Lynley a voice mail HERE-Connect with the Glass House on Instagram HERE-Please email us your questions and feedback to president@lifeway.com or leave us a voice mail HERE
Study finds agreeable personalities prime targets for Cybercriminals: SU Research by Radio Islam
In this message from April 28th, 2024, guest speaker Ben Mandrell explains why we should accept those who disagree with us on minor and unclear issues. Speaker: Ben Mandrell
We delve into chapter 2 from How to Pray at All Times by the great saint and doctor of the Church Alphonsus Liguori.
Host Douglas Arthur is joined by GOOCH Squad members "Jolly" Jeff Hickmott and "Mr. Agreeable" Michael Noble for a fun, fast-paced discussion of some of our favorite off-beat (and maybe not so off-beat) Christmas songs, including tunes by Esquivel, The Ramones, Greg lake, The Payolas, Wall of Voodoo, Henry Rollins, The Kinks, and many more! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/SpaceMules/message
Join us again for another rousing football/anything else goes conversation. The fantasy football semifinals are underway. Brad and Rich facing off in a "showdown" was not what they had hoped for but its what we are all getting. Sorry for the delay and we left the commercials. Please feel free to skip them. We love all our listeners and viewers, thank you for all your support. We will be back after the holidays with around 4 more episodes of greatness.
Are you feeling caught between wanting to please others and wanting to prioritize your health and well-being this holiday season? Listen in as I discuss the often tricky issue of setting boundaries, particularly during social events. Learn about mindset shifts and techniques to help you manage social pressures without sacrificing your well-being. I'll share relatable stories from some of our clients, Lisa, Sarah, and Amy, who have all grappled with these challenges, offering invaluable lessons for all of us. Join me as I navigate the tricky topic of saying 'NO,' exploring why society pressures us to always agree and be polite, and the damaging effects this can have on our health and autonomy. I'll also share insights on how to prioritize your own needs during the holiday season and how to say NO without guilt. This episode is all about taking back control and prioritizing your well-being. So, if you're ready to navigate this holiday season with more grace and less stress, this episode is for you. Chapter Summaries Setting Healthy Boundaries and Saying No (0:00:08) Set boundaries this holiday season without sacrificing well-being by shifting your mindset and using techniques to navigate social pressures. Saying No (0:16:02) Saying no without guilt, setting boundaries, and prioritizing needs are discussed to understand why people push for a 'YES.' Prioritizing Yourself During the Holiday Season (0:27:41) Prioritize needs, set boundaries, say no without guilt, and enjoy the holiday season. Get full show notes and more information here: https://elizabethsherman.com/podcast/152
What does your personality type say about your sexual and relationship tendencies? The Enneagram has become an increasingly popular personality assessment and can tell us so much about our romantic and sexual nature. What does it mean if you score high on Number 2, which is a Helper, but low on Number 5, which is the Investigator? We're going to dive into each of the 9 types with sex and personality expert, Lyndsey Fraser. I took the personality assessment myself and Lyndsey shared some interesting insight about what it might say about my sexuality. I'm getting vulnerable today!Lyndsey is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and an International Enneagram Association (IEA) Accredited Enneagram Professional. She has presented on the intersection of the Enneagram, relationships, and sexuality in various U.S. and international forums.Lyndsey also has had a small private practice for the last twelve years in South Minneapolis where she specializes in relationships and sexuality utilizing the Enneagram.You can find Lyndsey on Instagram @lyndseyfraserlmft.The Nine Enneagram Type Descriptions1 THE REFORMER The Rational, Idealistic Type: Principled, Purposeful, Self-Controlled, and Perfectionistic2 THE HELPER The Caring, Interpersonal Type: Demonstrative, Generous, People-Pleasing, and Possessive3 THE ACHIEVER The Success-Oriented, Pragmatic Type: Adaptive, Excelling, Driven, and Image-Conscious4 THE INDIVIDUALIST The Sensitive, Withdrawn Type: Expressive, Dramatic, Self-Absorbed, and Temperamental5 THE INVESTIGATOR The Intense, Cerebral Type: Perceptive, Innovative, Secretive, and Isolated6 THE LOYALIST The Committed, Security-Oriented Type: Engaging, Responsible, Anxious, and Suspicious7 THE ENTHUSIAST The Busy, Fun-Loving Type: Spontaneous, Versatile, Distractible, and Scattered8 THE CHALLENGER The Powerful, Dominating Type: Self-Confident, Decisive, Willful, and Confrontational9 THE PEACEMAKER The Easygoing, Self-Effacing Type: Receptive, Reassuring, Agreeable, and ComplacentIf you are interested in taking the test yourself, visit https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/.Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.If you like what you hear, don't forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you'll be notified when a new episode is released.If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if
What if you could join a tea party with Jane Austen, Agatha Christie, and Arthur Conan Doyle? Tune in to this riveting episode where author and screenwriter Julia Seals reveals the inspiration behind her latest work, A Most Agreeable Murder. We chat about how her novel masterfully intertwines Austen's elegant narrative style with an enigmatic murder mystery set in a swampy small town. Julia opens up about her unique journey to becoming a Jane Austen devotee and the profound impact of various literary influences on her writing style.This podcast is about Janeites coming together, discussing Jane Austen's work, and having a few laughs along the way. We really enjoyed making this episode and we hope you like it! Please follow and subscribe to keep up with all the upcoming episodes.Where can you find Julia? Instagram: @juliamaeseales Book: https://uk.bookshop.org/lists/episode-mentions Audible | 30 day free trial Izzy's recommendation: The Jane Austen Collection: An Audible Original Drama Support the showWhere can you find your host (Izzy)? Website: www.whattheausten.com Podcast Instagram: @whattheaustenPersonal Instagram: @izzy_meakinYoutube: What the Austen? Podcast
It's a two road match recap and Loudoun home match preview with some toes on San Diego folding and Harford The post #69 – Pleasing; Agreeable; Delightful: appeared first on Beautiful Game Network.
Desmond Lomax is a Senior Consultant, Master Facilitator, and Implementation Leader in Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion work at the Arbinger Institute. Find Desmond on Linkedin Arbinger books: Anatomy of Peace | The Outward Mindset | Leadership and Self-Deception What I especially appreciated was how you were able to take this topic that is top of mind and many people out there are talking about it, but you were able to humanize it and you were able to allow the audience to be able to connect from a human to human level. That obviously is so important in every environment, every circle that we're in. For our conversation, I wanted to bring that into the workplace, specifically hiring and integrating new people into the mix. But before we get into that, I'd love to just know how you get involved in this line of work. Desmond: I started in the prison system. I was a therapist for the prison system and it was my first introduction to marginalized people struggling to make it in society, outside of my personal experiences. I can't think of too many things more difficult than coming out of a prison system and returning as a citizen of the society and not feeling that you have the capacity or the resources to be able to do that successfully. So I went from a therapist to a manager, to a state director where I was in charge of all the programming outside of the prison in the state of Utah. From there, I started teaching courses in Forensic Social Work at the University of Utah. I'm a Licensed Clinical Therapist, so it all came together. I started doing many podcasts and videos about the things I've learned, and then my son passed away. I lost a child, he was a freshman in college. He committed suicide. I found myself in this unique position where I was like okay, Dezzy, you've been through some stuff now, you know what it's like to lose a child to something horrific. What can you do differently in society to create a greater sense of inclusion and belonging? I think that's what motivates me. My son seemed isolated and alone, even though we talked every day. We had a lot of communication and people cared about him, but there just wasn't a sense of belonging for him. I wanted to do something about that. I just took all of this background and my knowledge and as I was working with Arbinger, I joined their design team, and we created the curriculum called Outward Inclusion and I spent the last few years sharing the message of what it looks like in your organization and in your space where we can, 1) see the humanity of another person, and then 2) understand our impact on that humanity. As simple as that sounds, there are things that we all have that interfere with our ability to do those two basic things. I've been working all over this country, all over internationally, just doing the work, being motivated by the loss I've experienced and the knowledge that I've gained. Katty: Thank you for sharing that and heartfelt condolences. I don't know how long ago that was, but it's always fresh in the heart of anyone who's lost someone. Thank you for sharing that with us. I appreciate that you took something so devastating and you were able to turn it around and then bring positive impact to others from it. Desmond: Yes, I hope so. What I've learned is that loss is energy. It's bonafide energy and either you do something with it, or it does something with you. I would like to say there are all these other options, but either that is the same energy that is just really hard. I've seen both of them in my life so I'm not trying to say I'm on one side or the other. But loss is a lot of energy that you need to transform into something or else that loss will transform you. That's what I've learned and that's what I'm trying to do. Katty: Thank you for doing that and thank you for including us in that conversation. Let's go back to the two-pointers that you mentioned. The first one was seeing the humanity in each other and the second one was impacting humanity. Can you talk a little bit more about that and how it impacts the workspace, specifically as we bring in new people into that workspace; a brand new hire joining an existing team that's been together for a long time? Desmond: I love that, Katty. I always say to people, good people, good hard-working people are often blind to their impact on others. The first step to understanding my impact is to humanize aspects of the workplace. If I'm not humanizing the workplace, and I'm seeing people as objects, either vehicles that are doing the work I need them to do, or obstacles that aren't doing the work I need to do or relevancies. When I see people through that lens, what's happening is that I'm spending a lot of time justifying my view of a human being good enough, and spending a lot less time understanding that human being in a way in which I can be more effective. Thus, the new employee coming into the workplace my view and my objectification of that new employee can impact my ability to improve their life-work situations. If they approach it like “Here comes a new employee. It's going to take nine months to get them on board. Three months to do this and one month...” If all they are is a problem that I now have to carry until I get them to a point of efficiency, they will sense that and they will resist. What we've learned is that all people will resist being objectified. If we can start looking at the resistance in our lives and how we are seeing people and their resistance to us, we can start to recognize that maybe there are ways in which I see this person, ways in which I objectify this person that might be creating some of this resistance. Katty: You're saying that they're resisting because there's a feeling of sensing something coming from us that's creating that? They're putting their guards up. Is that what's happening? Desmond: Absolutely. Well, it's twofold. One thing, yes. A lot of times when we have resistance, it's because people have a sense of objectification. They see us objectifying them. The twofold is this, we may be doing things to objectify them and they may have emotional luggage that they bring with them to the circumstance where they've been objectified in the past that can also create some of those feelings. It can be twofold. It's not necessarily all on our side. As leaders, as people who are supervising, people who are co-workers, and we have a direct impact on people, we can only work on the latter part; our impact. How we impact these folks so that they feel seen, they feel valued, they feel they're a part of the process, and they feel amid all the difficulties that come along with work, that they matter to us. That's the part that we can control. Katty That we can hear their voices, right? Desmond: Yes. We can read a lot of books like, “How to Influence People and Make Friends,” and gain all the tools in the world, but people have a sense of when you acknowledge their humanity or not. What we've recognized is that in the hustle and bustle of work, when we're trying to accomplish what we need to accomplish, at times we are not humanizing the process. We do not see people as people and they are responding in a way that's resistant to us as their leaders or co-workers. Katty: What would you recommend both from the person who's starting their job, as you said, they're also bringing their baggage into the mix. We all have them, right? We travel with them. Hopefully one day we can set them down and lose that baggage. We're bringing that with us into a new role and our teammates, supervisors, all of them, everybody has their baggage of life with them. Right? How do we go about creating a space and creating dialogue around not allowing that to permeate? I would imagine that even during the interviewing phase, that probably can show up. Right? Desmond: Yes, this is something I've recently done in my whole life. I recently moved to a beautiful little town on the border of Maryland and Pennsylvania side of the base and Mason Dixon Line. 35 minutes from Baltimore. Amish countries. I get the best of both worlds. I can have a fresh pretzel one night and a crab cake the next night. Anyway, I'm in heaven. We've been here for a year. We spend more time inside of our house fixing up our house may be engaging with the community. I go to my wife, like, “Hey, it's the Fourth of July. The Lions International Club is looking for volunteers. Let's do some social exercise.” Let's just get out and meet people and connect with people. It's a social exercise. We went out there for two days, we volunteered, flipped burgers and prepped hotdogs and hamburgers, and met a lot of people in the community. We have our social baggage; we have our challenges and fears that are associated with connecting with new people and being in a new space. In the midst of all that, we have to practice social exercise, social work, and our ability to connect with others in meaningful ways. If I'm the new employee, I may be disappointed if I'm waiting for someone to engage me positively. I remember one of my first days at the prison. I worked as a correctional officer for many years and then became a therapist. The correctional work wasn't for me. I wanted to help and I didn't feel like I was helping, so I became a therapist. On my first day as a therapist, one of the supervisors goes, “Hey, what are you doing here? Don't you work somewhere else now?” I said no, I came here. He looked at me and he goes, “Why would you do that? This is horrible.” That was my first day at work. Sometimes, the social exercise we get from others is not the most positive thing. Sometimes, as new employees, If we don't socially engage multiple people, we'll find ourselves in a situation where the people that are engaging us can be bringing a lot of negative energy. For the new employee, social engagement and social exercise, meeting new people communicating with people, sharing your background, and gaining a deeper understanding of others is just a great way to acclimate very quickly into the process. For new employees, it's the same type of work. For every person that comes in, there should be a system in place. We can understand them in a way that extends beyond the work and what I mean by that is when people feel seen and valued, you understand their role, and they feel supported, they work at higher levels than those that don't. There's this generation that I come from, where it's like I care about you because I give you a paycheck. That's my way of saying that you've worked, good job. You get a paycheck. Somebody's like, “Desmond, I'm confused what's with all this seen, valued, have a voice, and roles? Back in the day, you gave me a paycheck and I'm unhappy. People have changed. Pandemics will do that to them. People will change. They want more from their work environment. As leaders, a part of our social exercise is helping those people that we're supervising or co-working with feel that sense of belonging that's needed for work performed. Katty: What would you say to the managers who are in charge of creating that welcoming, open environment, how do they go about humanizing that connection and roll out the carpet, that welcome carpet for their new people? Desmond: I've got a great story about when I was a State Director. I realized that a lot of people didn't like me. So I was reflecting on what can you do when people inherently don't like you. Because I think it's the position when you are in charge and you make hard decisions. I think it's also the personality. Some people like my personality, some people can't stand me. It's the nature of life. It's okay. I realized that as a leader, the only way for people to see you or recognize your personhood is for you to make them a priority. So as a leader, everyone that got hired, I tell all my regional managers, you go to the HR to make sure they get all the paperwork done. You come right to my office. We have a 30-minute meeting to learn. I got to know and learn about that person and in that meeting, I got to learn about that person, I got to express appreciation for that person and I got to let them know I was there to support them. In 30 minutes, you can accomplish so much. Over several years, all of a sudden, I became a very, like well-appreciated supervisor. Because I simply took the time as we say in the DEI space, to close the proximity. Instead of being the supervisor over here (so far away in distance) now I'm the supervisor right here in support of you. You don't have to guess who I am. Right there. The proximity is closed and I'm right there to support you. Katty: Close the proximity. I love that. Desmond: Yes, supervisors need to close the proximity so that the people that are there being supervised by the other supervisees don't have to guess about the type of person they are. Katty:Really showing up as authentic leaders themselves. Desmond: Yes, if they are willing to do it. Some people don't like themselves. I work with hundreds of hundreds, thousands probably of leaders when you get down to it, who are very nervous, very insecure, and worried about how people are seeing them and their ability to lead. If I'm stuck in that space, how am I going to be anything for anyone else? Katty: If one isn't open, if they can't close the proximity for themselves, it's going to be hard to do it for somebody else. Desmond: Beautifully stated. At the heart of most conflict is our internal struggles with ourselves. When we're treating people poorly, it's simply a reflection of our self-worth. Katty: It's that baggage again. Desmond: There we go. It's universal. Make no mistake, it's universal. We all carry things with us that we have to address, we have to acknowledge, and we have to love to work through them to heal. I spent many years as a therapist and the number one issue I saw was that people were so resistant to their imperfections. They were so resistant to the fact that they wanted to accomplish something and they couldn't. I spent quite a lot of time asking them can you love that part of yourself? Can we do that first? I think we can start making some grounds for changing the behaviors that you want to change. Katty: Love that. That's sometimes easier said than done. Desmond: Katty, that's okay too. I have lifetime struggles that I'm currently dealing with that I'm trying to overcome. Things I'm trying to get better at and I struggle at those things all the time. Do you know what I call that? Being a human being. I am very human. They're just elements of my life that are very human and that I need to improve on and get better at, and things I need to love about myself that are hard to love and just going through that whole process. Katty: Thank you for sharing that. So that was point one. Let's talk about that second pointer, humanizing or creating impact with that. Desmond: I work with a lot of organizations and a lot of training has put us in this space. It's like, well, my intent is good. Let's just assume everyone has good intent. Let's just assume that we're all just, in the midst of our humanism, we all have good intent. Sometimes we're going to have conflict. I think that's a good place to start. But there's something we can do a little bit better, and that is having the courage, to understand how we're directly impacting the people who lead the Cowork in a positive and or negative way. I think that's the kicker. Do we have the courage to ask the right questions in a way, where we can get the answers we need to understand our impact? Because until we do, we're just kind of an ‘okay' leader. Katty: That is such an important point there. I was just talking about this the other day with someone about the interviewing process and how in some companies multiple rounds of interviews are necessary and multiple stakeholders are necessary to decide whether a candidate moving forward or not. The intent may be to include all stakeholders and that decision-making, but the impact on that candidate sometimes is either the company can't make a decision or they don't like me. They're not going to move forward with me. And we just don't sometimes recognize that our intent may be a bit intense, and the implication that it has to that person is a completely different one. Just having that awareness is so huge. Desmond: It is and like I said, that's just one aspect and just look at how powerful it is. If I can just address that aspect, we can figure out a system to interview people in a way in which they feel that they're joining a meaningful work family, joining a group of people that are willing to support them, instead of running them through this gauntlet. You can interview me six, seven times, but each time if I feel more at home with the organization, I'm fine, but if you're interviewing me five or six times, and I'm feeling unseen, I'm feeling like I'm more or less going through a process instead of being a part of a process. It's going to create the consequences you're talking about. That's why when we talk about this humanization, how does a human feel going through six interviews? Why don't we ask them and understand their impact? Leaders are busy and sometimes they just feel they do what they think is right and they're not asking impact questions. They're not figuring out the pros and cons. So they're just decent. Not great. Hopefully, they're good, but they're just decent leaders who are unaware of how they are impacting people. Or even worse, I really know I'm having a negative impact but I don't know what to do differently, so I'm just gonna keep an emotional distance from everyone, continue to do my job, and do it in a way where I can maintain my job and stay blind to the impact because if I dug deeper into it, it would come up in a way where I might need to change. Desmond: The most liberating thing we can do in life is change. It's okay to be different. I work in spaces where people are waiting for me to say or do something wrong. Many of us work in those spaces. If you're in the DEI space, the Inclusion and Belonging space, and it's become politicized, people are waiting for you to say something to validate their view or to be in opposition to their view. In situations like that, I have to be willing to humanize that process and say, “Yeah, I did say that and that's not appropriate.” Or, “Hey, I didn't understand that.” As we say at Arbinger, it's not about being right, it's about getting it right. I can be my most authentic if my mindset is if I make a mistake, I'll just work on getting it right. Some people are so hell-bent on being right, they can't move to that stage of getting it right which would greatly improve their capacity to lead others or to work with others. Katty: That's powerful. That recognition itself is powerful, to come to that as a leader of an organization and as a manager of a team, and recognize just what you said, that DEI space is about belonging and to have not only the foresight, but the strength to step into this unknown, or maybe it's uncomfortable, but that's okay. Because growth comes from that and that's a good thing. Desmond: I would add the DEI space is about office and work productivity. We neglect that part of it sometimes. It is about work productivity. Research has been out for a long time about how people perform when they feel a sense of belonging. We have to stop putting this DEI thing in a separate space. This is one of the things I talk about in my ADT talk. If I'm a leader, DEI is over here, away from me and I'm just doing the training. I'm trying to do this inclusion training to make sure my organization is going to be productive, but I haven't included myself in inclusion work. It's about the other folks, it's about the females, it's about the people of color, it's about people with different sexual orientations than I am. We're missing the main fact that it is about you, no matter what your background, orientation, or beliefs are. If we all are working on inclusion, instead of it being something these marginalized groups need in my organization, that's when it fails. It fails when I don't include myself in the inclusion process as a leader. And I'm somehow supporting and helping all these other groups, not recognizing that when I feel included in those groups and we're all feeling included, then productivity is a direct result. Katty: So powerful. It takes me to me. I'm an immigrant and I came here when I was in high school. In the middle of 9th grade, we immigrated to the States. I felt so excluded. I'm from Iran originally and this was in the middle of the hostage crisis. Probably not the best time, I felt, not the best time to be Iranian at that time, but I just felt very excluded. But I don't think anyone excluded me. I excluded myself because it felt like it was my protective layer of letting me exclude so that nobody says anything because that may hurt. Desmond: There may be a twofold thing there, Katty. I'm going to protect myself because that's a lot easier than opening myself up to criticism and there's also the second part of it that could be I literally came from a different country where maybe society doesn't see it as a great place, and because of that, I might be susceptible to things that aren't nice. So it can be twofold, and that's the complexity of the work. There are certain circumstances whereas an African American male, I'm probably a little overcautious. Like in how I engage people and how I communicate with people. I have bosses that are like, “Dezzy, you are way too agreeable.” I'm thinking in my mind like, do you guys want me to be disagreeable too? I don't. I don't want to come off as a disagreeable black guy that you work with. Agreeable works for me. Can you just let me let it work? So there are parts of it that are grounded in my overprotection of myself, and parts of it are grounded in a lot of evidence that I've had throughout my life where people look at my skin color and treat me differently and make assumptions about me based upon that. It's that twofold nuance there and it's universal. You've had the experience that, I've had to experience that, and many people experience that in a lot of different spaces. Katty: How do we ensure that in the workspace, in the hiring space, and in the recruiting space we can create this? We can close this proximity by using words where we can create a sense of belonging sooner than later. I think we recognize we need to do that but sometimes, it's too late and a candidate feels like they don't fit in. I'm leaving. Desmond: That's a great question. Organizations need a common language. They need a common way to communicate. At Arbinger Institute, we try to provide people with that common language, but in like a worst-case scenario, you need everyone in the organization to understand this is our organization's definition of inclusion, belonging, diversity, and of equity. We need a common language so that we can take care of the people that we're bringing in. The other part is we need to figure out where are our weak spots. Because most organizations are struggling internally with how they're treating each other. How can I expect the new people to come in and have a different experience? We need to work on the language. Focus on what's going on internally in our organization, and how we're currently treating each other, and then create a plan which humanizes the process across the board. I know so many organizations, that want to create all these new processes for all the incoming people and the staff that are there, are like what? Do they get a $1000 bonus for getting hired? I understand the need to get people in the door, but I'm telling you, like, you need to humanize. The process get the common language is to figure out how to take care of people internally, then create a plan that involves the incoming people as well as the internal people in this process of belonging. Katty: Because otherwise, you'll be creating separation. Desmond: That's one of the common issues we have when organizations are trying to implement DEI work, it's not inclusive. They're trying to diversify but it's not inclusive and it's not creating levels of belonging that they would like. A lot of organizations like “What we do now?” Get a common language, take care of your people internally, make sure they're supported, and whatever you do over the next few years to create a strong inclusion and belonging system, do it across the board. I tell people, everything that they do should be able to be implemented across the board. If you can't do it across the board, you need to reflect upon it and see what your purpose is. For example, there are a lot of groups and organizations like LGBTQ+, and Indigenous American groups. We have a lot of different groups and they're great if they're inclusive. If there is just a group for just people to talk amongst themselves about what's working and not working, then all it creates are silos. it's not inclusive. All the groups should be welcoming. All the groups should be sponsored in a way that they're providing education and support to everyone in the organization. I think from the recruitment and the new hires, doing things in a way where people are humanized across the board in the organization will get you a lot further than just focusing on the new hires who then come in, because then there are people who haven't gotten what they've gotten that are now having to train them. It's a lot of meaningful conflict. One thing is to the middle managers and most organizations, I say that the C-Suite tries to define the culture. The middle managers and first-line supervisors are running with it. What I've learned is that we're neglecting first-line supervisors and middle-level managers. We're neglecting them and putting them in a situation where they get negative both ways. They're getting negative from all the problems they've got to deal with, with their staff, they're dealing with all the problems they have to deal with from the administrators about them, and they're just caught in the middle making two or three dollars more an hour than their staff, thinking what the hell is this, right? What I've learned is that focusing on the trainers of these new hires, the first-line supervisors of these new hires, making sure they're cared for, they're trained in a way where they can be supportive, is everything. One of the most common things I see is “Hey Desmond, this is great training, but my first-line supervisor is still treating me like crap.” If we're not empowering our first-line supervisors, and caring for our first-line supervisors, then we're going to see ongoing issues with incoming staff. Katty: What I'm hearing, Desmond is once we create that plan, it needs to be operationalized across everything. It can't be my twist on how we're going to be doing it. This is how we're doing it across the board at all levels. We all have to step into it. We all have to believe it. We all have to accept it otherwise, probably from a core value standpoint, it's a mismatch anyway, right? It's probably not the right job for me. Someone who's not willing to embrace it. Katty: You know, Katty, you're on point. I'd add one more word, modeling. You have to model. The strongest implementation of work is modeling. I tell people all the time and they think I'm weird, but it's just truthful. I say ever since I went to preschool, my parents have taught me. how to be safe as a black male in America. Be careful how you behave. Be careful how people respond to you. If you feel you're in danger, walk away. If there's an issue, do this. If someone comes to you in the middle of the night, call us. In my day, it was a pay phone. Get to a pay phone and call us. My whole life since I was in preschool, I've been trained to behave or act in certain ways to make sure my environment is safe; safe as I can control. I received my Ph.D. starting at the age of 4, 1/2 to now, of understanding people. Understanding the energy they bring, understanding the safety they bring or lack thereof. Understanding their frustrations and anger. I am just focused on the nuances of the people I work with, for good or bad. So when you come to me with this great, do I project right or this great initiative that we're going to do? And I'm using my skills. I'm 49 now. I'm using my 45 years' worth of skill to evaluate you as a person. I'm going to have a pretty clear, clean sense of whether you're genuine or not about the work you're going to do. Or whether this is just one more thing that you've been obligated to do as my supervisor Katty: Checkbox, right? Desmond: Yeah. I'm not alone in this. I'm not the only one in society that has been trained for safety to pick up on the nuances of others. I know women who will tell me at least you can walk around at night. It's like I've talked to women who said, Oh my goodness, like that has been my experience, Ever since I've grown up, I've been very sensitive for my safety. So people know when people are thinking, they know when things matter to them. A lot of times we have these leaders that are going through the motions of the work. People know. Just before they even open their mouths, whether it's something authentic, or whether it's something you're just going to do the motions on. That's one of the reasons the DEI processes often fail. Katty: Tell me about the process you guys have at Arbinger and please share a little bit about Arbinger and what it is that you do and how you go into organizations to create impact. Desmond: We are an organizational change organization. We work on mindset change. One of our mottos is we like to humanize the workplace. We go into organizations through consulting and training, and we help create a common language. We call it the outward mindset, our ability to see people as people, or our ability to see people as objects. In the process of creating this language, we have multiple curriculums: outward performance, outward leadership, and outward inclusion, are just 3 trainings we have to help humanize the process, whether it's in performance, whether it's in leadership, or whether it's in inclusion work to humanize the process in a way in which people have a sense of our authenticity. In a way in which people feel seen and they respond based upon it. We have multiple frameworks built around this understanding that humanizing another person, that's our quickest way to create resolution. In most of our most complicated circumstances and situation. Katty: Amazing. I'll be providing your contact information and Arbinger if anyone wants to reach out to you and needs that support to bring that into their organization. But if they wanted to do it on their own, if they were so passionate about creating a sense of community and belonging and just being heard and being present, how did they go about it themselves? What's the first thing you talked about? A common language, but maybe that's beyond them, right? Maybe that's an organizational thing. Be just within their team, what can they do? Desmond: There are a few basics, you can start by reading. We have a couple of best seller books. One is called “Leadership and Self-Deception.” It's on Amazon, one of the best sellers on organizational behavior work. And one book is called “Anatomy of Peace.” It's probably one of the number one or #2 conflict resolution books on Amazon. Then a third book we have is called “Outward Mindset”. So those are good foundational books that you can start to read. You can read them as a team and then start to get some of that language together. We also have public workshops. You can go to www.arbinger.com. There are public workshops you can sign up for there as well to take a deeper dive into some of the things I'm talking about. We have a bunch of different mechanisms like I said, from the options of just grabbing one of those books, to signing up for a public workshop. We have a bunch of options that we offer as an organization. Katty: It seems that as long as someone is open to having those half-hour meetings that you were having with your team, which sounds like with existing and new people. We just really need to open up the door for bringing our full person to work, our full self to work. Just really look at people as if they are who they are, they're human beings. They're not the admin. They're not the tech guy. They're not the designer. They're human beings. A human is being there with challenges, struggles, aspirations, all of that and we need to see that. Desmond: Yes, and I will throw one more nugget out there for your podcast to reflect upon. When I don't see the humanity of another person, then I spent a lot of time justifying why they're not human or not as human as I am. When I stay in that justification, I form bonds of anguish and frustration with those individuals. When we're asking you to see people as people, we're not asking you to just only see the good side of people or take a Mother Teresa approach to life where you're giving everything of yourself. What we're asking for you to do by seeing another person's humanity, is breaking free of the bonds of anguish that are associated with seeing them as an object. We're asking for emotional and cognitive freedom. When you see the humanity of another person, it's a much better place to start. When you're looking at the challenges and conflicts of your life, if you start with objectification, it's always going to be much more difficult to resolve something than when you start with an analogy, another personality. And like I said, someone may say, well, That's what somebody is saying. I can feel it. But I'm telling you, we all struggle with this, and it's just a dilemma that we got to limit and learn to face while doing our work, doing busy work, and accomplishing the tasks that we need to do at work. Katty: That's probably it. We're so busy running around in ten different directions that it feels like if I take a pause back, and connect with you, I don't have time for that so can you do whatever you need to do? Desmond: Right. Katty, you're on point. We don't see it as a part of a long-term solution. Taking that 15 to 20 minutes to understand a person more deeply, to help that person to solve their concerns, were more likely to get the accountability that we seek. In objectification that's associated with correction and it goes back to the whole impact piece. Then I may not realize that my intent may be just to get it done quickly, but the impact that I'm leaving with you as well, you can't do it yourself. So let me do it for you. Yeah, that's a whole conversation there too. Desmond: Beautifully stated. Katty: Thank you so much for taking the time and talking about what it means to be inclusive, and what it means to create a space of belonging in a in a work organization. But really we're talking about beyond that, we're talking about just in any interaction between any two people. That's talking about. Desmond: I've learned a quote recently that was like “when you interact with people, we want to leave them better than when the came.” The goal in life is to leave a person better off with the experience you've had with them then when they first interacted with you. I've made my mistakes and had my struggles in life for sure to accomplish that, but I think being much more aware that that's a process for me has been very helpful to recognize that each person is a person. One of my goals in life is to improve my impact on that person. Katty: Thank you for sharing that message with everyone. If we all could do that, it would be a beautiful world. Well, thank you so much again. As we wrap up this conversation, I will share the books that you mentioned. I know you've authored some of them, “The Anatomy of Peace.” Incredibly impactful. I got a chance to get that when we were at a ATD. I want to thank you for taking the time to being here with us and talking about this really, really incredibly important conversation. Not just because we need to check a box, but because we all need to see each other as the humans that we are. Desmond: Yes, and I will add, I didn't author the book, the Arbinger Institute as a whole did, but, thank you. You'll find the books and Amazon at the Arbinger Institute. They listed there as an institution. Thank you, Katty. I appreciate your time. Thank you for the invitation. Thank you for being the type of human being that's willing to lean into conversations that I think create solutions where we often don't see solutions. Some people see this space as a dilemma that we have to overcome or try to figure out, but there are a lot of solutions and inclusion in this space. Thank you for inviting me to be a part of your podcast. Katty: It's been a pleasure talking to you, Desmond. Thank you.
Still digging for genka…
A lot of what we preach here on the Unapologetic Man Podcast is how to stop being so agreeable, how to hold frame, and be masculine. But, as with everything in life, there must be balance. And if all you are is a stone cold stoic and emotionless man, she's going to leave you. You need to learn to be a little warmer, and in today's episode Mark shares with you some key tricks you can use to demonstrate that you also have a sensitive side. Trust us, women love it! Get Your FREE 1 on 1 Breakthrough Session By CLICKING HERE Watch UMP Episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCybix9PZoDgcyyt5hNxPLuw Grab Mark's Free Program: "The Approach Formula": http://www.CoachMarkSing.com/The-Approach-Formula Follow Mark on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachmarksing/ Contact Mark Directly: CoachMarkSing@Gmail.com
At one point in time, we've all met a guy who has a chameleonic personality who will quite literally change his opinions and world views in real time to mimic that of the girls he's around. They hope that if the girl sees they share the same opinions then they will find them attractive. Makes sense on paper, but it doesn't work in real life. Women aren't looking for an overly agreeable man who only ever tells them they are right, they want a masculine man who isn't afraid to hold his frame and say no. So in today's episode, Mark highlights the importance of being faithful to your opinions, and how being disagreeable sometimes actually helps to INCREASE your attractiveness to women. Get Your FREE 1 on 1 Breakthrough Session By CLICKING HERE Watch UMP Episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCybix9PZoDgcyyt5hNxPLuw Grab Mark's Free Program: "The Approach Formula": http://www.CoachMarkSing.com/The-Approach-Formula Follow Mark on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachmarksing/ Contact Mark Directly: CoachMarkSing@Gmail.com
Kathleen, Karen & our two Emma's are all guns blazing as we close in on what's bound to be an eventful final few rounds of this season's WSL action! Got a question for the pod? Email TheCOYGIGPod@offtheball.com! The COYGIG Pod on OTB Sports is in association with Cadbury, the official snack partner to the Republic of Ireland's Women's National Team.
In this week's episode, I unpack what you want to be aware of when it comes to working with other "healers." Ultimately it comes down to authenticity and if you feel they are trustworthy. This work requires a high level of integrity, clarity, and the recognition that you have given up your free will for divine will. What is a “Bullshitter”?A“Bullshitter” is not necessarily a bad person, but rather a person that may have a tendency to:misrepresent themselves frequently (either to you or to themselves)forget the discussed boundaries of the relationshiphave completely unspoken expectationsor is selective about boundaries. (Sometimes yes, Sometimes no.)Listen – If you believe, as I do, that life is a precious commodity —You NEED to learn how to identify people who do not value you enough to create a meaningful relationship.Step One: Listen to Their Words, are they clear, concise and how do fr when they talk Indicators in speech for quality of character:Are they positive? Considerate? Complimentary? Agreeable? Do they talk about productive and goal-oriented ideas? Number 2: POLARIZATION AS FACT—Are they stuck in polarity/ good bad and fear-based languageNumber 3: THEIR DOUBLE LIVES: Are they constantly showing how # blessed they are and how they manifest X Y Z in the form of money, but when you really get into the details they're a fucking mess. Look at their lives and don't be fooled by money. This is incredibly deceptive. Watch their actions and if they walk the walk and talk the talk.Number 4: OUT OF BODY FOCUSED It's all about astral projection, accessing higher realms, Uber plant medicine ceremonies anything that is hyper-focused on manufacturing enlightenment or needing to be outsourced.Number 5: THEM OVER YOU. Hierarchy. Are they putting themselves above you? Are they claiming to be experts all the time and have it all figured out. If they are constantly selling you on the “I'm so special!” Leave. It's total bullshit.Number 6. OUTSOURCING. If they're working with any archangel, they're the second Mary. Discern. Your higher self is all you need, in connection to pure source. That's it. We can't awaken alone, we all need help along the way and if you have guides that's wonderful just know that they're you in other dimensions. Number 7: DELUSIONAL NEW AGE LANGUAGE AND PRESENTATION. Pay attention to how you feel, when you listen to them. Chances are you'll get a feeling or a knowing that this is the person who can help take you to the next level.Stay Curious, Stay ConnectedIG @superfreqy // @taliemilerTikTok: @taliemillerPinterest @taliemillerLinkedin: @taliemillerSubstack: VERY FREQY GIRL™ > taliemiller.substack.comWebsite: superfreq.co
Joining me on the podcast today is my Accelerator client Melissa Lawrence, who recently went through a massive rebrand from agreeable grey to full on cheetah goddess vibes. She covers how the industry she was in was impacting, very subconsciously, how she was supposed to show up and be... and the massive energetic, emotional, and financial returns she has had through the Brand Alchemy process. To connect with Melissa, find her on her website https://yourworthycareer.com/, tune in to her podcast The Your Worthy Career Podcast or connect with her on Instagram @melissa.yourworthycareer To join the Brand Alchemy Accelerator, head to www.kathrynmorrisoncoaching.com/course
What if the qualities we look for in our salespeople - being agreeable, friendly, and eager to please - are actually hindering our sales and costing us profits? In this thought-provoking podcast, sales expert Jeremy Miner challenges the conventional wisdom that a happy and accommodating sales team is always the most effective. With decades of experience in the sales industry, Jeremy brings a fresh perspective to the table, showing how a different approach can "pull your clients in" and avoid the common pitfalls of traditional sales techniques that often trigger resistance in potential customers. From door-to-door sales teams to high-level boardroom negotiations, the insights shared in this podcast have the power to transform the way you think about sales and revolutionize the way you do business. So join us as we explore the fascinating world of sales psychology and discover how to unleash the full potential of your sales team. Get access to a free mini-course called the NEPQ 101 Mini-courseSign up here: www.salesrevolution.pro I had the opportunity to spend quite a bit of time with some very, very, very successful people, and we were talking about legacy and what we want our legacy to be. What do we want to leave behind after our days are over? And a really interesting. Comment was brought up, and this is something that I think I need to share with everyone because it's something that not very many people think about. We all think about all of the success, and we all think about what we're going to leave behind and how great it's going to be for whoever it is, whether that be an organization, our families, or whatever it might be. We're proud to leave all of them. Things are behind to the next generation. This one particular topic, though, really stood out and made me realize that, yeah, you know, I have some work to do in this area as well. As many of you know, my father passed away when I was 16. He drowned in Cape Hatteras. And I'm not gonna get into all the details as to what happened afterward, but essentially this idea, this concept that was brought up was something that I lived through as well, and the idea is so simple. All you have to do is just put instructions in place for whoever it is that you might. Giving your assets to afterward. Tell them bank accounts, tell them, you know, plans who, who has what information, how, if you have a business, how does the business run? Who is responsible for what? Just planning out and giving that information to you. Heirs can be incredibly, incredibly powerful and they will thank you over and over and over and over again for having the foresight to be able to put all of that information in place and have it in one area so that people know and understand it. On Invest in Square Feet, we unlock the secrets of wealthy entrepreneurship. I'm Matt Shields and my mission is to help business owners just like you, protect your wealth so that you can invest passively in multi-family real estate. Okay, so today we're going to have a really interesting conversation with a sales professional named Jeremy. If you've heard of him before, you probably know that he has some, we'll call it unorthodox ways of selling, and we'll get into this, but most sales trainers, most salespeople approach sales with a very. I guess the happy type of mindset. You want to be the person that is very upbeat and positive when you approach whoever it is that you're trying to sell to. And Jeremy teaches a completely different idea, and I can tell you from experience that this does work. This does get you more. Engaged with your sales prospect, so I'm not gonna spoil it. I'm not gonna go any deeper than that. Jeremy's gonna dive into the entire process, and how you can increase your sales, and it is completely unintuitive to what most people believe. I remember the sales manager was like, Hey, Jeremy, just remember when they opened the door. You gotta be really excited, be really enthusiastic, and start talking to 'em about all the great things this is gonna do for them. But I noticed from the very first door, That I was getting all these objections every time I, the more excited I was, the more turned people, people were, more turned off, the more excited I was. We can't afford it. We don't need it. We already have a company for that. Uh, we already talked to you guys last month. I need to talk to my spouse. Let me think it over. Can you call me back a week, a month, or a year later? And I remember probably about seven to eight weeks in of that if I remember. There was this one time I was, I was standing on the curb. I was actually sitting down. I still remember cuz my legs, like when you, have you ever done door-to-door sales? Sure. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. You know, when you go around door to door for 10 straight hours, your legs start to get pretty damn tight. Mm-hmm. , right? Like, it's, it's a, it's a workout in itself and you're talking like the middle of July, full humidity, sweat, drench down your back, you're at nine o'clock at night. And I remember one particular, it was a Friday night. I was sitting there waiting for the sales manager to pick me up. I'd worked 12 hours that day and made zero sales. So when you make zero sales in a straight commissioned sales job, that means you make $0. You can be better off working at McDonald's. That whole week I'd made zero sales, so I'd worked 60 plus hours, made $0, and I remember setting there, just barely married. Child on the way, how can I go home to her and say, we don't have enough money to pay our rent in a couple of weeks, we're gonna have to move in with your parents. Mm-hmm. live in the basement. It's gonna be one of those guys. Okay. Yeah. My pride, I did, I had too much pride to do that. Okay. And I remember thinking like, you know, maybe. Maybe selling just wasn't for me. Maybe I just wasn't a salesperson. I was not born. I need to get a real job. Okay. And I remember, uh, when the sales manager picked me up that night, he popped in a Tony Robbins cd, cuz 20 plus years ago, people, believe it or not, listen to things that are called CDs. Mm-hmm, he popped in the CD and I might be butchering it, but he said, he said something to the fact that, that most people. For the simple reason, they don't learn the right skills that are necessary to succeed. They don't learn the right skills. Now, I went on to say that everybody's taught skills, but the people who fail are the ones who were not taught the right ones. And when I heard that it was like this. It was like the kind of the. Maybe the heavens open up to me like there's this light, light bulb moment, like, you know, like the God was speaking to me and sent down his messengers. That may be what the company was training me and what I was learning from some of the old sales gurus. Maybe they just weren't the right skills. Maybe they were outdated. Maybe they just didn't work. Very well with today's prospects. I never thought that that could even be a possibility. I was so new in sales, I just didn't know what I didn't know. Mm-hmm... And at the same time, my degree that I was going to school for magically thought heaven's behavioral science, and I was getting a minor in human psychology. Okay, which is kind of important to understand in sales. I don't think most salespeople understand the psychological impact, of the way the brain thinks. And so I was learning from my professors that the most persuasive way to communicate was here the theory, but from the gurus, they were teaching. It was over here. It was like completely opposite. So I'm like, how do I take the theory of behavioral science and how the brain makes decisions to do something or not? How do I take that and put that into a sales process? Mm-hmm... So that was my whole thing at that point. How do I do that? So I started learning how to use techniques that work with humans. So instead of pushing my prospects that trigger sales resistance that most salespeople are taught, I started learning from just the way human beings interact and the way they think. Psychology to get my prospects to pull me in where I didn't have to push when I started learning that skill. Selling became very, very easy and extremely profitable from that point. Are you with me? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, so walk through an example of that, like, right? So I would imagine that when you first started out selling whatever it was you're selling, you know, as you know, knock, knock, knock on the door. , you know, Hey, you know, ma'am, we're, we're here, we're selling, you know, this product, and it's, you know, gonna be great. You, you're gonna get this and this and this, and Oh no, I don't want it. I don't want it. As you said, you went through all the different objections. What, what did that turn into after you started realizing this? How did that, how did that pitch change, would you say? Yeah, and it's obviously different door-to-door than if you're selling B2B or more inbound leads. Outbound leads, which I can give different examples for that as well. But you know, what I started noticing is that the more I looked and acted and talked like a salesperson, The more resistance I was getting from the prospect. Mm-hmm... So I started thinking, even in those days, 20, it was about 22 at that point, how do I reduce that resistance? So I'm not competing with that in the first minute. Because if you're competing with sales resistance the very first minute, it's so hard to overcome that. You're just competing with objections the whole time. It, just makes selling so stressful when it doesn't have to be. So how do I reduce resistance? So as a door-to-door salesperson, which is gonna be different than if. Selling to a boardroom meeting. It's a little bit different there, but what I started doing is I'm like, Instead of wearing all these nice clothes that my sales manager taught me I should wear and like nice watches and jewelry. Cuz that just smells like what, right? Sales. Salesperson. Salesy. Yeah, exactly. Salesy. How do I, how do I get them to view me not as a salesperson, even in my wardrobe? So I'm like, okay, what I'm gonna do is I bought like a $10 Walmart watch. Cause I didn't have any money anyways. It wasn't like I was doing a fancy watch, but I bought like a $10 Walmart watch. I remember I put a tape. On my side of my, of my, my pants, I wore just cargo khakis. I wore a white New Balance grandpa shirt. Do you know what I'm talking about? The white new balance, like when you become grandpa age, you start wearing the white new balance cuz you want the cover. I started wearing those as a 22-year-old Okay. Just a regular polo shirt. Very basic. Had the company logo on there, and then I'm like, okay, what other things can I do? I got a metal clip. like this with like a survey thing on it, so mm-hmm. , I think I'm more like a meter reader. And then I went and got a lime green and an orange construction vest. I'm not kidding when I say this. And just that alone, when they came to the door, lowered resistance cuz they didn't view me as a salesperson trying to sell them something. So instead of being up in their grill like I was, I was more back and I was sitting here like, Looking around the home, you know, kind of looking around like, I'm doing a survey, and they come, they're like, oh yeah, how can I help you? And I'm like, yeah. Are you guys the, um, are you guys the, the homeowners here very like, confused, like Yeah, yeah. We're the homeowners. What's going on? Immediately? Instead of like triggering sales resistance that most salespeople do in the first 10 seconds, I'm triggering curiosity. Okay. Just that alone, man. I could go into a lot more, but just that alone, right there almost, I call it the confused old man, because when you hear a confused old man, what do you wanna do? You wanna help you help. Exactly. Exactly. Help, right? You wanna help the confused old man? That's a great analogy. Just by that lowered sales resistance by 80, 90%. And then if you have the right questions to ask at the right time, you trigger to be more cur. One thing we all have to understand, this is just behavioral science 1 0 1, within the first seven to 12 seconds of any sales interaction you are involved in. Mm-hmm. , whether that's. Door to door, whether that's on a cold call to a company, whether that's presenting to a board of directors, whether that's in a home selling B2C or an inbound lead. You're setting here like we are on Zoom. Your prospects subconsciously, we cannot even help it the way our brain works. Are already picking up social cues from you. They're picking up on your verbal and nonverbal and body language cues from your tonality and what you were saying and or asking that triggers their brain to react. This is scary. If we don't understand this, react in one of two ways. Okay? So if we come across as aggressive, overly assumptive, and needy, you know what I mean by needy, right? You can tell when the salesperson needs the deal, right? Hey, do you have two minutes of your time or I can? Nobody believes you're only gonna take two minutes of time. You're needy and you come across attached. And you don't know the right questions to ask. It triggers the brain to go into what we call fight or flight mode. You've heard of fight or flight mode, right? Sure, absolutely. Everybody has. But does anybody know what triggers fight or flight mode? Most people don't. And as a salesperson, you probably want to understand what triggers fight or flight mode. So you eliminate that so you don't trigger fight or flight mode cuz then you're just competing against the Great Wall of China, I call it. Mm-hmm... It's like the great wall of objections you have to then break down. I'd rather not have a wall at... I'd rather just have complete openness so I can do that. So that's where the prospect, when you trigger fight or flight mode, as everybody knows they do what They get defensive. Mm-hmm. , that's flight mode or flight mode is they try to get rid of you and they say things like that, oh, I forgot about the appointment. Hey, I'm too busy. Can you call me back later? Oh yeah. Call me back Saturday night at 10:00 PM Okay, I'll call you back Saturday. And then they never answer. Right? Yeah. Or, you know, after we, we just don't need it. Uh, we're good. We already used somebody for that. How much is this gonna cost me within the first 30 seconds? You're just, you're triggering that. Okay. Now, once you learn how to work with human behavior, okay, we call that neuro-emotional persuasion question. It stands for n e p q, and you learn how to come across more. In your conversations now when I need, when I say neutral, that means you're unbiased. You're not quite sure if you can even help yet. How? How could you even know if you could help it? Like if somebody comes to you and says, Hey Jeremy, I appreciate you. Let's say you're going in front of a boardroom meeting and they're like, Hey Jeremy, this sounds really good. Somebody you haven't even met yet. A decision maker. You've met with three or four other decision-makers. Now you're coming in, there's eight. Four of them don't even know who you are. And they're like, Hey, we are to use a vendor for this. Why should we go with you? What would most salespeople say when they heard that? What do you think they would say? Yeah, they would, they, they start going, oh, we're the best at this, or You should go with us because we've been ranked the number one in customer service and we've, JD Associates ranked us, and our clients are this and this and this. That's why you should go with us and our competitors. It's in one ear out the other. Because why? Because every salesperson says that. So they just associate you with everyone else trying to stuff their solution down their throat that's ever tried to sell them something. So what I wanna do is I want to disarm that person. I want them to let their guard down. because if I can get them to let their guard down, then they become open to what I'm offering. Mm-hmm. , if I can't, very hard to make a sale. Okay. Or it just prolongs the sales cycle by 10 times. Okay. So if they say something like that, I'm just gonna lean back and say, well, I'm not quite sure that you should yet. Yeah. You know, we'd have to understand a little bit. About what you're using right now in X, Y, Z areas, just to see if we could even help, because there are some firms where there's just not much we can do for them, and they're sometimes better off staying with who they already have. So for example, we need to understand and then boom, I want you to watch when you do that, the body language and the demeanor of the prospect when you say, well, why should we go with you? Well, I'm not quite sure that you should yet. , if you pause two or three seconds, they're gonna be like, mm-hmm. Yeah. You can just tell them, it's just it, you take over the status in that room. Mm-hmm. , because experts and authorities don't need the sale. They already have all these clients that are getting results. They don't need you. In fact,, when you do that, it's almost like they view you much differently. They're like, Okay. Maybe I should listen to this person. He doesn't seem needy. Mm-hmm. , because when you feel that somebody's needy, let's say you're, you say you're single and you're chasing after somebody, you're really interested and you just keep chasing them in the beginning, what do they typically do? Yeah. They're gonna run away. They run. Yeah. But if you act like you don't need them, what do they typically do? Yeah. Then, then they're all over. Yet they, yeah. They want that. Pull you in more. It's the same thing in sales. I, I don't know why nobody's putting that together yet... It's just. Human Psychology 1 0 1. That is so interesting. So, You know, obviously, again, this, this can go in all kinds of different directions depending on exactly what you're trying to sell and the, the, uh, the, the platform or the median that you're trying to use it in. But do you have, a framework or a structure that you would say, you know, works pretty well in pretty well? You know, any situation too. Again, ki that that opening comment, that opening remark, is it, is it essentially, you know, I'm, I'm not sure you should or, so biggest, the biggest problem with most companies and their salespeople is that their salespeople do not have a structured sales process that everyone in the company is following. everybody's doing their own thing. They're just winging it. And then the, the owners, the, the sales management are wondering why, oh, y you know, they're losing 30% of their staff every six months having to replace 'em. They just, there's no se there's no sales structure that actually works. Mm-hmm. the reason why, our company has grown so fast, like Inc. Uh, I mean, it doesn't really matter, but Ink Magazine ranked us the fastest, or Inc. 5,000 list, ranked as the number one fastest growing sales training company, not overall. , but number one, fastest growing sales training company in the United States last year in just our third year. The reason that is, is because our sales structure, our methodology that we train companies, n e PQ works for any industry. Mm-hmm... When people say, well, I don't know. I know you train this company in that company, in this industry, but I don't know if it'll work for me. I sell X, Y, Z, and Z digits, and it has to be sold a certain way. I just don't know. All we simply say is, do you sell to human needs? Mm-hmm. ? Yes. Now, do the human beings you talk to, do your prospects talk to, or do they have problems? Yes. Or do they have at least emotional needs? Yes. Does your solution solve those problems and emotional needs? Yes. Then what we train you would actually work for what you sell, okay? Mm-hmm... So we use a methodology called N E P Q which stands from neuro emotional persuasion. Persuasion questioning. So from the start of that conversation, okay? From what we call connecting questions, which take the focus off you. Put it on them. Mm-hmm. from situation questions that help you and the prospect find out what their real situation is from problem awareness questions. This is all structured, okay? It's not out of order. It's in a structure because it persuades them the most. It pulls them into the most problem awareness questions that help the prospect find out what their real problems are. One thing we all have to do, and we all know this, is that most of your prospects when you initially start talking to them, don't even know that they have a problem. , or maybe they know they have a problem, but they don't really know what the problem is. They know that something's wrong, but they don't know what the real problem is, or most of them don't really understand the consequences of what happens if they don't do anything about solving the problems. So when you learn what we train you, not only are you able to help them find that one problem. but you're also helping them to able to find two or three or maybe four other problems they didn't even realize they had. And when you're able to do that, not by telling them that you tell them what their problems are, it does what one ear out the other. You're biased, you're the salesperson. Your questioning allows 'em to see. How bad their problems really are, and it builds a massive gap in their mind from where they are. We call that their current state or current situation compared to where they want to be. We call that their objective state. Now, what's the gap in between all of these newfound problems that your questioning skills allow them to see they have, that they didn't know they had before? When you're able to do that, they start to view you. They don't view you like all these other salespeople trying to push something down their throat. Yeah. They view you as the expert, the trusted authority in the market that they're going to buy all of the time. So problem awareness questions help you and them find out what their real problems are, and the root cause of the problem. See, most salespeople can help them find a problem, but they're not able to help the prospect realize what the root cause of that problem is, and then most importantly, how those problems are affecting them. , personally, I'm talking even CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, how those problems are affecting them personally, the business personally. Okay. Then we wanna move into a stage called solution awareness questions that allow them to see what their future's gonna look like once all these newfound problems are solved. So they're like, oh my gosh, this is what my future's gonna look like for me, for my business, for themselves personally, depending on what you sell, B2C or b2b. And then we wanna ask what's. Consequence questions that allow them to see what the consequences are, the ramifications are if they don't do anything about solving the newfound problems, okay? Mm-hmm. , then we're, if we're in B2B sales, we're then either going to transition into the next step. That could be a demo. The next step could be a proposal. The next step could meet the board. The next step could meet the next decision-maker. Just depends on what your next step is in your sales cycle. B2b, if you're in b2c, If it's a one-call close, say you sell life insurance or something, just as an example, be the next step presentation. Okay? Or maybe it's a two-step next-step demo. Then the close just depends on your industry, and your process. We teach all of that. And then how do you present? How do you present back where it emotionally connects the dots? So instead of boring your prospects to death with like a 50 mm-hmm. slide deck. About, here's our corporate office. It looks so fancy. Here are our awards. Nobody cares about that. I hate to tell you this. Nobody can give an S h I T about what your corporate office looks like or how many awards you won. They can Google that themselves and look at your company website. They do not care. You are just boring them. We wanna connect the emotional dots of their problem. , the root cause and where they want to go, and how our solution will actually solve those problems and give them where they want to go. That's what they care about. Mm-hmm... And that gets 'em to think results-based thinking. Over price-based thinking, because if you get 'em to think price-based thinking, you're dead. They're just gonna negotiate you down. You get 'em to think results-based thinking. They will gladly pay way more to your company to solve their problems and get them what they want. If they can feel like you can get them the best result, they will gladly pay way more. I can assure you that. Mm-hmm... Mm-hmm... And then we wanna ask what are called commitment questions that get them to commit to take the next step and purchase what you're offering to solve their problems. So that would be the sales structure. in an overview, bunch of boring nerd stuff. I know. No, no. I, I, I love that and I, I, I'm, I'm curious. Um, I, I think that a lot of people will go in, as you said, they've got their 50-page or 50-slide deck thing Correct? And go into this pitch and here's who we are, and we did this, and we have this and, and all of this fi Yeah. And finally, in the end, they get to whatever it is that they're, you know, they're, they're trying to sell with your approach. Would you, would you say you're selling in a boardroom? Would you walk in and, and, you know, start going into that? We're gonna have a presentation up on the board, but we're also gonna take him... It's not like we're just going into the boardroom and that's the first meeting we've had. Yeah, it's typically a first-call discovery. If you're selling b2b, for most industries, the first call's gonna be a discovery call with some type of C-level executive. That might be part of the decision-making process, probably not right. And then you're navigating. You have to learn the right questions to navigate through the organization and bring in the other decision-makers. Forbes had an article the other day, about the average company in the United States of America, we're not even talking Fortune 500 or Fortune 100, just the average size company has 6.7 decision makers and or influencers. Now, even if it's not a decision-maker, what happens if you're selling some type of software? Let's say that you're selling cyber. And you're selling to a bank, say Wells Fargo for example. I'm just throwing out some. In some companies, not only do you want to get involved, the decision makers, let's say the CFO, F, or the CEO make the ultimate decision, I dunno, or the department, but let's say the CTO O is gonna be the one that's gonna have to train. their staff on how this new software works. They don't make the decision, but they're the ones responsible for training the staff. Do you think you probably want to get that C T O and the department head over there involved because do you think they can influence the ultimate decision maker on what they decide to do? Hell yeah. Because, the ultimate decision maker might not be down in the trenches and even know what their problems are. They might have zero ideas, they're over the company. They don't know what's going on in the cybersecurity part. So not only do you have to get the decision makers involved, you have to get the influencers because that c t O might feel his job is gonna be threatened by this new software. They could feel like it's gonna take too much to install it, it's gonna take too much to operate it, and then they. Shoving it off to the decision makers and dissuading the decision maker, and then the sales loss. So you have to know how to navigate and bring those other people in. But if you're in a boardroom, typically there's gonna be even other decision makers in there who don't know anything about you. You go in there and just go through a presentation, you're, it's like you're wing it. You're hoping and praying that something you said in the presentation is gonna stick and they're gonna magically buy. Uh, we call that. , you know, it's a drug. I love it. So many salespeople take where they hope and pray something they're gonna to say is gonna stick. And that's a hard and unpredictable way to close sales. It just, you have no control. So we wanna go in with that sales process. It might be an abbreviated questioning process, but we're gonna start off that instead of like, Hey, going right into our pitch. We might come in and be like, now John, I know, I know we've, we've met and we've talked about X and Y and Z. Let's, let's do this. We prepared something to go through on how we could. You know, the challenges, that Jim and Laura brought up the other day, but just so I don't go over things that they might have already discussed with you, what would everybody like to cover today? Just to see if we can actually help. Mm-hmm... And then I want to get like, well, we wanna cover this and we wanna cover that. And I'm like, okay, now I know where to go. And then I'm gonna ask more questions about that. I might start going through the presentation, but I'm also gonna stop and ask situation and problem awareness questions while I'm going through the presentation. So instead of a 50-slide deck, I might have that down to 10 or 12. My questioning skills are really pulling out more emotion. Cause that's where decisions are made decisions. And then I can close that. Dig you with me. Yeah, yeah, for sure. For sure. That makes perfect sense. Um, if you, if you could draw a picture of. Some of the results that you've gotten, right? Like what, what a salesperson's results might have looked like before they were going through your training. Look like after, I mean, I could, we have over 7,000 testimonials, in the last 28 months. So, we train every industry. So Forbes says there are 158 industries and then subsets of those, we're in all of those at this point. So, uh, we have, we trained over 351,000 salespeople in the county. In, the last three years, over 7,000 testimonies. The hard part about getting testimonials from salespeople is they never wanna. Yeah, how they're outselling everybody three to one. It's like pulling teeth. Like we don't, we don't even ask people anymore. People just come into our Facebook groups or ads and they'll post like, Hey, I started going through N PQ a year ago and my income went from 5,000 a month in commissions. Now I'm making 25,000 a month in commissions. Selling the exact same thing. Or, you know what? We have this home improvement company and we were doing 5 million in sales two years ago, and last year we did 47 million in sales, like massive results. You know, that's why we're ranked so high on, the INC 5000 list because you can't have that type of growth as a company without getting crazy results for your clients. Mm-hmm... And that's kind of why it's spread from, you know, fortune 100 companies. We even have a few of those clients now, all the way down to celebrities like Ryan Sirhans, one of our clients, the Million Dollar Listing New York guy, we train all of his salespeople that sell real estate, and lead generation coaching programs. Man, you know, wasn't that a great conversation? I know that I learned so much, and I hope that you did as well. So in today's episode, we learned just how important it is to approach the sales process from your customer's point of view. What is it that they're concerned with? What is it that they are interested in learning and fixing on their own? We learned how that typical, happy, upbeat characteristic that most salespeople have can actually be creating sales rejection before the conversation even starts. Success in sales is all about building relationships, and when you approach the sales call from a way where you are truly trying to understand what it is that the customer is struggling with, and what are their concerns, you're going to build a much, much deeper, more lasting relationship. If you're interested in learning more from Jeremy, I suggest that you check out some of his Facebook groups. Jeremy gives away a tremendous, tremendous amount of value for free in those groups. But he also has a free course@salesrevolution.pro where you can sign up and again, you get a free course called N E PQ 1 0 1 mini course, and he says that there are a few questions included in that mini-course, and just including those few questions alone to your sales process is going to increase your sales. And don't forget, if you wanna understand what the wealthy do, head over to invest in square feet and sign up for our newsletter. We include more content in that newsletter from our guests, and you can only get that from that newsletter. That is also how you learn about different investment opportunities in real estate and technology that we personally invest in. We drop every Wednesday and we are available on whatever podcast platform it is that you use.
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Do you ever go around feeling like you are agreeing with what everyone else is saying or doing? Do you ever feel like you go against the grain on what people do or you like to "push people's buttons"? Listen to us discuss the personality traits agreeable and antagonistic. What does that look like when someone is one or the other and how do those, two very different personalities, interact with each other?
I'm embarrassed to admit this even happened. Yet a recent appointment made it crystal clear: I am a people pleaser in an unexpected way, with unintended consequences for people I care about (not to mention myself!) Furthermore, I experienced in real time when it's worth it to be uncomfortable for a moment, to save yourself hours of discomfort if you stay silent. We could call this: The one where my hair was accidentally died red (again) on a day I just happened to have a call with our community here and therefore I had the beautiful accountability to walk back in and show up better for myself. Links mentioned in this episode: The Elegant Excellence Journal is coming so soon. Make sure you're on the waitlist to hear first! Journal & discussion Q's: When do you not speak up and why? When do you cause more discomfort for people close to you by doing so? What is and is not rude, or demanding, or high maintenance? What's the story you/culture tells you, and what's the neutral truth? What do you not think is that when a man does it but do when a woman does? Would love to hear your thoughts after on Instagram @HilaryRushford. Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! © 2019 - 2023 Hilary Rushford
In today's episode, Nineveh Madsen goes over social conflicts that have led to society becoming too agreeable. Not only has society become too agreeable...but there seems to be a consequence of being CANCELLED if society disagrees with anything. As a society, we need to be able to confidently DISAGREE with someone or something, and not have to risk getting canceled! What are your thoughts on being too agreeable or being afraid to disagree? Has society taken it too far where we are not allowed to use our voice? --- HIGHLIGHTS: Learning not to be too agreeable where you lose your voice The consequences of pleasantries when becoming too agreeable Disagreeing with a VERY MAJOR societal issue...must listen to find out what Learn to disagree...and don't lose your voice as we all have a right to say what we agree and disagree with Cancel culture getting out of hand? --- SOCIAL MEDIA: Follow Nineveh on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ninevehmadsen/ Check out the SupraHuman website: https://suprahuman.com --- TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 - PRELUDE 01:15 - Let's dive right in to the controversy 01:30 - Are you too agreeable? 02:00 - Definition of being to agreeable 02:45 - Are you too pleasant where you feel fake? 03:30 - One of the consequences of being to agreeable…in today's society, with today's politics and “trends” 04:45 - Men are Women, and Women are Men…what happens when we become too agreeable? 06:00 - The ad from 2021 about “People Have Periods” 07:15 - PS did you know that men can not have a cycle? 08:00 - Manufactured concept that women but support women 08:45 - I disagree with the statement and the message 09:30 - Build the courage to be disagreeable 10:00 - Are you prepared for what disagreement will bring you? 11:45 - We shouldn't perform for people's approval 12:30 - Disagreement is where you discover who you are and what you are made of 14:15 - Clarity creates congruence in your mind and your body 15:00 - Think to yourself…are you average? 16:45 - No one should shut you up…EVER 18:26 - END --- Don't forget to subscribe to the I AM Nineveh Podcast JOIN THE SUPRAHUMAN TEAM AT: www.suprahuman.com to schedule a complimentary call
Sometimes it seems as if one or more of our kids doesn't have feelings, or is okay with anything. As if they are so easy in nature that nothing bothers them. Maybe that is true to some degree. Perhaps they are more easygoing personalities, but what if those feelings are there and just need a place to come out and space to be seen and heard? Having trouble sleeping? I have been using both the Sleep Ez Natural Support capsules and the Aromatherapy Lavender Spray from Botanic Choice to help me relax and let go of the day. Botanic Choice is a trusted brand supplying a wide range of vitamins and supplements. Head over to https://www.botanicchoice.com/ and use code MICHELLE15 to get an exclusive 15% off anything sitewide. Working with individuals and couples is my most favorite work. We dive deeply into the ideas of connection and unravel the struggles of each individual family I work with. It's a transformational paradigm shift each and every time. I have seen families undergo huge changes that forever impact their relationships. My One on One programs have limited space, so if you're interested click here to find out more. I look forward to working with you. Enjoy today's episode? Please share it with a friend or leave a rating and a review. Working on our own inner hurts and childhood triggers can unravel many of our parenting issues. I do this with journaling and it has helped me work through some icky places in my own past. If you want to try, download my FREE guide: Healing Ourselves Through Journaling. Are you a coach, or an online course creator? Have an email list you communicate with often? Do you have a website? Kajabi can be your home for all of these and so much more click here and explore all Kajabi has to offer while supporting the Peace and Parenting Podcast at no extra cost to you. Follow Peace and Parenting: YouTube: Peace and Parenting Instagram: @peaceandparenting Facebook: @peaceandparentingla LinkedIn: @Michelle Kenney M.Ed Peace and Parenting Facebook Group Apple Podcasts Spotify Amazon Music
#agreeable is 1. enjoyable and pleasurable; pleasant 2. willing to agree to something These definitions seem SO innocent. How in the word could they be seen as a bad thing? Have you ever heard someone say too much of a good thing isn't a good thing?! To be too-agreeable could lead to a system of people-pleasing or self-sacrificing. Today's episode will give you a fresh, unique perspective on this behavior or personality trait and how it may be showing up in your life. Do you think that being #agreeable is a positive, negative or both? Do you think that you are #agreeable? Does your agreeable nature often get labeled as #people-pleasing? I'd love to hear from you, if you feel inclined to share a small part of your story with me email me at bee@embldnlabel.com Cheering for you, Bee
In which all our predictions come true! We see Kieran in the mirror, flashing us back to his last mirror trauma, and seem to prepare for his assassination... only to invade Lauren's room instead. In wonderful contrast to all his previous experiences, Kieran turns to Lauren for help. They pay a nocturnal visit to Darcy, who is delighted to participate in her own kidnapping. We learn more of her motivations and beliefs and that she knew Bella was a PS assassin! This chapter was all we could have asked for! ***
Brian and Chad take a deep dive on one of the traits of the Big 5. To be emotionally intelligent, how agreeable should you be? Listen in to find out! Referenced in this podcast: Our new eCourse 4 Assessments Every Coach Can Use (and Should!)
In this episode your host's Samantha Jimenez and Levi Brickley dig into the deepest meaning and qualities of our masculinity and femininity. We will answer the question of "Masculinity and femininity complement each other. How and why?". This question is often viewed as a controversial topic. In and of itself this is the problem of why in modern day culture it is hard to find the truth. In this raw uncut conversation the answer is sought out in the pursuit of truth. Key Topics: Meaning and philosophy of Adam and Eve Competency is attractive The needs of men and women Understanding one another Men taking responsibility The role of mothers and fathers The balance Agreeable vs. disagreeable Hypergamy The female test What men and women provide This is not controversial Why it's viewed as a controversial topic Please reach out to either Samantha or Levi via the links below. Engage and become a part of the community! Follow Samantha Jimenez: Instagram: sammyj.lifts TikTok: sjimenezzzz Follow Levi Brickley: Instagram: Brick34levy TikTok: lbrickleyofficial JOIN THE PURSUING TRUTH PODCAST COMMUNITY: Email: theveritaspodcast2021@gmail.com Facebook: Pursuing Truth Podcast YouTube: Pursuing Truth Podcast TikTok: @pursuingtruthpodcast Instagram: @pursuingtruthpodcast Please leave a rating and review Apple Podcast: Pursuing Truth Podcast
Rumor has it she was also too good in bed. Chicago's best morning radio show now has a podcast! Don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts and remember that the conversation always lives on the Q101 Facebook page. Brian, Ali, & Justin are live every morning from 6a-10a on Q101. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Kathleen McNamee, Karen Duggan & Emma Byrne break down what has been an eventful week for football both on and off the pitch. Emma Carroll also stops by with possibly the most agreed upon Team of the Week so far... Listen to the end to find out how you can win €1,000 for your local grassroots adult club! Got a question for Kathleen, Karen & Emma? Email TheCOYGIGPod@OffTheBall.com! The COYGIG Pod on OTB Sports is in association with Cadbury FC, official snack partner to the Republic of Ireland's Women's National Team.
In today's show, the doctors discuss: 1. I have been married for 8 years to a man who is a federal government employee. He is very responsible and reliable. Now, since the pandemic, he has been working from home 4-5x/week. I have notice how lazy he is. I workout, eat clean, do the cooking and all the cleaning. I find myself getting so irritated when I am with him. He is overweight and growing. He literally sits watching TV or reading articles on the computer and eating crap during working hours. I do not understand why my habits are not more influential. My question is, how can in manage my feelings of frustrations and irritability. I border lack of respect and even attraction to him, am I being too dramatic. 2. I am in a relationship for about 4 years now. I am an agreeable introvert she is disagreeable introvert.. we both like spending time together and doing things, but our sex life is not great, she has some medical reasons and penetration is painful.. and this is something that comes up every now and then, she confessed previous relationships ended because of this, i can feel it most times she is not enjoying having sex, but she puts up with it. My question is, is such dynamic possible, can a relationship survive long term, my sex drive is quite high, i'm 30, she is 28.. i feel like we should make it work but dont know what are the odds of this, i find myself reaching out different outlets to express my needs. 3. How can I tell if my boyfriend is in love with/is really interested in his 'female friend'? How often would you say intuition is right in these situations? 4. Is it possible to be an agreeable highly testosteronized male? What would such a male look like? This confuses me bc I often think of highly testosteronized as a dominance climbing, aggressiveans & competitive and so am wondering how these traits co-exist.
The guys get Fidance'd by this week's guest: the one and only Ian Fidance! They discuss first impressions, death by firing squad, and Joe Rogan's gunshot kicks. Also in this episode, the Convoy record is shattered! IAN FIDANCE Instagram: @ianimal69 Twitter: @ianimal69 BI GUYS PODCAST YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCT53zAW4z03SuMV8iwuk0wA SOPRANOS PRIMA VOLTA PODCAST YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dwi2S7FkTnA&list=PLjmKjYi0rx05hQIsv8yeMeBOYpJUasybq *** MERCH: https://thelaughbutton.merchtable.com/heres-the-scenario New episodes drop every Wednesday via The Laugh Button http://www.heresthescenario.com FOLLOW THE SHOW Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/HeresTheScen... Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/ScenarioPod Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/ScenarioPod FOLLOW THE HOSTS Mike Feeney: @iammikefeeney Mike Cannon: @iammikecannon Brendan Sagalow: @BrendanSagalow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
We are posting a Patreon episode this week as our producer, Brandon had to take the week off for a family situation. David teaches us one of his best tools for diffusing outlandish statements for our kids and those around us. Join us on Patreon for exclusive episodes and being able to get your questions answered!www.patreon.com/lightthefightIn need of glasses? Use Liingo!Use code: LightTheFight for 30$ off your first order. www.liingoeyewear.com/lightthefight
There have been some amazing interactions behind the scenes. In today’s episode, Scott shares some of the recent comments he’s received on his episodes. Most of today’s show will cover an interaction with a believing member and their dialogue about episode 41 The Ninety and Nine. Become a Premium Subscriber: Monthy: $3 Yearly: $25 $50 $100 $250Support the podcast by […] The post Rameumptom Ruminations: 044: An Agreeable Disagreement appeared first on Mormon Discussions Podcasts - Full Lineup.
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