Podcasts about despondency

The truth behind the priests lecherous legends.By Nakod Apa. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.The PledgeAs was customary, the Temple constables came for Diana early on the day that she came of age; for it was ordained that one who had not been sired by a man was holy and consecrated to the service of the gods, if male to become a priest, if female to serve as a vestal servant; and that they should remain celibate all their years. She wore her finest outfit and did herself up for this big occasion. Today she was accepting a celibate vow and a lifetime of religious duties in the temple and the ministries of the priests. She was stunning, and folks stopped and stared along the streets, as her family procession went by.Diana was named for a great goddess. Her natural beauty was striking. Her inner grace and humility prevented her from any vanity at all.Peaceably Diana bade farewell to her mother but allowed them to follow behind her, to the Temple stronghold, for even had she so wished, there was no way she could escape her fate. She had long known that it was her destiny to become a vestal, as it had been her brother's to become a priest.Shut in a small cell, the hours passed slowly, boringly, as she waited to be given the first initiation step; a red robe of a novice; then be instructed in her duties. At last there came a clatter in the corridor and the sound of a key in the lock. Awkwardly, bearing a tray of food, a tall, young priest entered.“Jon!” She exclaimed in surprise. She jumped up and embraced her brother.“Hush, not so loud, little sister,” he admonished. “I had to bribe the kitchen vestal to allow me to deliver this in her place.”“But how are you, brother? Two years and I've not heard from you. Why have you not written?”“As you will discover it is not permitted for those commanded to the service of The Gods, to communicate with the ones they leave behind.”“Not even their sisters?”“Especially not them, for they might disclose the truth of matters that only The Chosen may know.”“Oh! But I was chosen to become a vestal anyway.”“And now you are not. That's why I came as soon as it was possible. To advise you.”“What do you mean, not to become a vestal? What else can I be?” Diana was confused.Jon paused to gather his thoughts. “Let me first set you aright, for much that we are taught is false; especially, that only those who are married may know and practice sex. Thus it follows that the children of an unmarried woman, like us, must have been conceived without benefit of a man, and are therefore special. Correct?”“Yes, of course.”“It's complete nonsense.”“Then who is our father?”“I know not, except that he must have been a priest.”“But the priests are celibate.”Jon gave a snort. “That is what we are meant to believe. The truth is that a priest may have sex whenever he pleases. I've enjoyed many women in the last two years.”“But where did you, do they, find the women?”“What do you think vestals are for?”“You mean, no I cannot believe it.” Diana was dismayed.“Vestals keep house, but that is secondary. Their main duty is to serve us priests. If you had become a vestal you would have been required to entertain any priest who desired you, and with looks like yours it would not have been long before most would have taken and enjoyed you. Wow, look at you, Diana! You're far more beautiful than I remember! These past two years have been very good to you.”“But what has this to do with being special.”“Well, how do we replace those that go to join the gods? If it were to be with the offspring of priests and vestals it would expose the myth of our purity, and in any case would eventually lead to serious inbreeding. So, at a certain point in their career, each priest is commanded to select from the Common Folk an unmarried woman he fancies, then drug the Eucharist she receives at prayers, divert her to private quarters after mass, then wait for her to pass out. When she finally awakes, she knows nothing of the sexual relations that occurred. But if she conceives, she is publicly esteemed by the priest, for having an immaculate conception. The bastards are the special ones, the replacements, us.”Diana shuddered and studied the floor. “But if I'm not to be a vestal, what am I to be?”“You remember in our lessons they taught us about the war with the nation of Dragonia?”“Yes.”“And how as part of the peace treaty, and to mark our subservience, we are bound to provide an annual tribute?”“Sure.”“What they didn't say was that this tribute is not a tax. That collected tax is diverted to secret clerical treasuries. The actual required Dragonian tribute is only nominal, and takes the form of a maiden. A beautiful young maiden from among the vestals and pledges. She becomes a slave to please and entertain the man who is ruler of Dragonia, The elders have decided that you are to be our tribute for this year.”“But I'm not beautiful.”“Oh my sister, Your humility denies the truth. Everyone else thinks otherwise, and they make the decisions in the Temple. Anyway just accept what comes, for a day or so. It won't be anything serious, at least not until you are given to the Dragonian dictator. I don't know what happens after that. But for now I'll keep an eye out and help where I can. Look, I'll have to go or they'll be wondering where I've disappeared to. Eat that food. Keep your strength up.”Awkwardly Jon leant forward and gave her a brotherly peck on the cheek, then slipped out of the cell door.The InitiationSomewhat perturbed Diana toyed with her food until, some thirty minutes later, two vestals appeared, led her to a room lined with old, cracked tiles, briskly undressed her, bathed her, then clothed her in an ancient red robe.“What happens now,” Diana asked.“You get to be taken to the High Cardinal.” One of the vestals told her. “Come on! He's impatient to know you.”Wearing only his outer dalmatic vesture, the High Cardinal watched as Diana was brought to stand before him. The red shift marking her as a novice was threadbare and at least two sizes too big, only just clinging to the points of her shoulders and leaving bare her slim neck and clavicle. The thin cloth draped itself enticingly around her ample breasts and rippled slightly as she walked, plainly revealing the bulge of her nipples with their dark areola. Her gleaming black hair tumbled down her back in disarray until it nearly touched her tight butt.He said nothing, just looked. He felt his manhood gradually stir and stiffen into readiness. This was one he would relish. Three-and-a-half score years, and more, were behind him but still he had the will and the power to want, ravish and enjoy, although not as often as in his prime. This one would delight him with the softness of those hand filling breasts and the thrusts of his shaft inside her hot, throbbing center. Of the many vestals he'd selected to pleasure him over the years, few had possessed a body to compare with this girl. It was a pity she must be relinquished to the Tribute, but it had to be. At least he would have a use of her before she was sent south.For her part Diana waited uncertainly. The supreme head of the Temple, this holy man, was staring at her most peculiarly. It was as if he wanted, intended, to have her. But no, he couldn't, if Jon was right he could take any woman he wished, so why should he want her? Anyway he was so old. That scrawny neck, those hollow cheeks and drooling lips revolted her. The thought of those liver-spot covered hands roaming across her body, fondling her breasts and caressing her thighs, made her feel sick.“My daughter. It was intended that thou shouldst become a vestal. That our priests, who so devoutly serve the Mighty Gods, might be blessed with some reward for their endeavors by enjoying the pleasures of your body. But on occasion the good of our congregation requires another, higher, sacrifice. We wish it were not so, that we could keep you amongst us, but we must bow before The God's command. Thou art to be our Tribute to The Great Dragon, the ruler of Dragonia, that he may leave us in peace for another year.” The High Cardinal paused, “We do not have to explain, your brother covered it well enough.”“You were listening?”“Do you think we are so imprudent as not to take a few precautions. Of course we heard all that he said, There remains just one item to be confirmed. Your beauty is undeniable, but alone it may not suffice to provide the pleasure to which a ruler is entitled. It is our duty to confirm that you will fully answer his desires.”She was muddled, disjointed, confused. “I don't understand.”Prima Nocta“We must be sure that when he uses you, as a man uses a woman, you will satisfy him. So we must first test your bounty.”“I'm to be mated?”“Yes. It is a chore we will ourselves undertake.”The thought of being taken by him repelled her. His pretense that he was only performing his duty was unconvincing, every word merely echoed his lust for her body.The High Cardinal drew a silk scarf from the pocket of his dalmatic vesture. “But first, since your preference will likely run to youth rather than experience, let us blindfold you. Then you can focus your mind on our skill, not our image.” He fastened the scarf around her eyes.“Now come. Disrobe and let us savor that lovely body with which The Great Gods have blessed you.”What choice did she have? Trembling, she raised her arms and reached behind to unfasten her shift. Lazily it fell to circle her feet. She felt a slight draught caress her body, and shivered as she imagined his eyes on her naked and vulnerable flesh. He would be studying her boobs, her untouched cunni. Tightly she pressed her legs together to hide her nether lips.“Trust us,” he said. “Do all we say and you will have an experience you will never forget.”She managed a faint, “I do not doubt it, Your Grace.”Smiling, pleased with her submissiveness, he looked her up and down, his eyes agleam with desire. His gaze lingering first on her quim with its lush beaver, then on her full, firm tits. His breathing grew harsh, his chest heaved as he reached for her and crushed her to him, the hardness of his erection stabbing her stomach. His palms stroked up and down her back, gently massaging her, feeling the smoothness of her skin; then paused on her hips, slid round to her flat belly and up, up to those adorable boobs. He stopped for a long moment, just cupping them and savoring their firm weight.When he again moved he slowly dragged his palms to and fro across her nipples, feeling them swell, before holding her by the shoulders and easing her to the couch. Firmly he pushed her back until she was lying, her neat buns at the edge, her legs dangling.His hands left her. Diana could hear a rustling, he was removing his dalmatic vesture. Quiet footsteps and she sensed he was beside her again. A light, barely felt touch, brushed her mouth. Her tongue instinctively flicked out to find his finger as he caressed each lip in turn. Then he stroked her cheeks, before dragging his palms down across her chin, her neck, the hollow of her collar bone, smoothing the skin in small circles. When he reached her left breast he pressed gently around the edge spiraling in until he found her bud. It stood high for him to squeeze firmly, sending a bolt of ecstasy straight to her centre. She moaned.The High Cardinal heard her breathing deepen, leant forward and ran his tongue around her other breast. God, she was tasty. His thin lips opened to take her swollen nipple into his mouth. He nipped her with his teeth, sucking her deep.The fingers of his other hand found her cunni. Gently, oh, so gently at first, he stroked her from clit to anus. His fondling grew firmer. He pushed a finger inside to test her dampness, was gratified when she arched her back and pushed her mound into his hand.The scarf was doing its work; she was unable to see him but his heavy breathing and the musky, unmistakable scent of sex was feeding her carnal needs and overcoming her revulsion. Her soft, “Yes, yes,” was music in his ears.“What do you want, my dear?” he asked.Diana barely heard him, all she knew was the rapture of his hands and mouth thrilling her in a way she had never known before. As he rubbed her clit, she began to pant, gave a low moan and dug her nails into his shoulders, then down his back to his hips, instinctively pulling him to her.He held back, in no hurry. She felt him ease himself onto the couch and kneel across her. All the time his tongue licked her nipples, his fingers explored her cunni, testing her wetness but not entering her. Her breathing quickened, she was near to climax. She whimpered, she needed to be filled. He would not let her come. His touch on her swollen cunni lips was feather light, then firm, then light. He seemed to sense her need and to repeatedly rouse and then deny her.She was ready. His fingers parted the soft lips of her center. The helmet of his cock butted them, sliding up and down coating itself with her dampness. He eased away from her, placed a hand to one side to take his weight, his other reaching for her thighs to open her wider before grasping his now totally rigid staff and positioning it at her entrance.She felt it, hard yet soft, probing, pushing her lips apart as the glans slowly entered, forcing deeper and deeper. There was nothing else in the world now but this manhood thrusting, filling, rewarding her. His stroke was slow, his pelvis grinding her clit. She couldn't resist. The tremors started deep inside her then rushed out to explode around his cock.He heard her cry, felt her come, but it was too soon, he wasn't ready yet. He thrust harder, faster; her beauty, her pleasure, her satisfaction were a dim, unimportant memory. All that mattered was his release. His thighs tightened, he shuddered, he whimpered. Hot and hard his seed erupted into her, filling her. He lowered his chest onto her two soft boobs and rested while his heartbeat slowed and the blood drained from his tyrannical probe.Some minutes passed before he rose, resumed his robes and removed the blindfold. “Yes, you will be a worthy Tribute. Would that we had more time to attend to your education ourselves. It would please us greatly to instruct you further. However, the Gods have ordained otherwise. You are required to leave at first light.”“No. Leave that. You deserve better,” he said as she reached to cover herself with the discarded shift. He pulled a cord by the tapestry and she heard the faint chime of a distant bell.The two vestals who had escorted her into his presence entered and genuflected. They were good looking women only a few years older than Diana.“What is the meaning of this rag?” The High Cardinal thrust the shift at them.“But, Your Grace, it is not worth giving her new robes just for the journey. Especially as we are told she will be naked for the presentation ceremony.”“But what if she is seen on the journey. What of her dignity. She deserves your respect. Both of you, remove your robes. Now!”Quaking somewhat at his anger they quickly unfastened their gowns, red with the white edging of senior vestals, and laid them before their feet.“Right,” he turned to Diana, “take your pick. Either should be a reasonable fit.Hesitantly Diana stepped to where, naked, staring at the floor, the two vestals waited. Gingerly she selected the nearest robe and swiftly lowered it over her head, grateful in the draughty room for the residual warmth of it's previous owner.Priest GeorgeThere was a sharp rap on the door. “Come!” Commanded the High Cardinal. The figure that entered was young for a senior priest being but a couple of years older than Diana's brother, but he carried himself with the assurance of one who has already received some prominence in the governing hierarchy.“Ah! George. Well timed.” The High Cardinal frowned at the two Vestals. “We will discuss your performance later. You may withdraw.”Hastily one gathered up the remaining robe and the other the rag that Diana had worn and, still naked, they hurried out of the chamber.“There she is, George,” the old man gestured toward Diana. “You may take her and be on your way. I will expect you back within three weeks.”The young priest bowed his head. “I am honored Your Grace. I will not fail the Gods.” Reaching out he took Diana's hand and drew her from the room.

The truth behind the priests lecherous legends.By Nakod Apa. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.The PledgeAs was customary, the Temple constables came for Diana early on the day that she came of age; for it was ordained that one who had not been sired by a man was holy and consecrated to the service of the gods, if male to become a priest, if female to serve as a vestal servant; and that they should remain celibate all their years. She wore her finest outfit and did herself up for this big occasion. Today she was accepting a celibate vow and a lifetime of religious duties in the temple and the ministries of the priests. She was stunning, and folks stopped and stared along the streets, as her family procession went by.Diana was named for a great goddess. Her natural beauty was striking. Her inner grace and humility prevented her from any vanity at all.Peaceably Diana bade farewell to her mother but allowed them to follow behind her, to the Temple stronghold, for even had she so wished, there was no way she could escape her fate. She had long known that it was her destiny to become a vestal, as it had been her brother's to become a priest.Shut in a small cell, the hours passed slowly, boringly, as she waited to be given the first initiation step; a red robe of a novice; then be instructed in her duties. At last there came a clatter in the corridor and the sound of a key in the lock. Awkwardly, bearing a tray of food, a tall, young priest entered.“Jon!” She exclaimed in surprise. She jumped up and embraced her brother.“Hush, not so loud, little sister,” he admonished. “I had to bribe the kitchen vestal to allow me to deliver this in her place.”“But how are you, brother? Two years and I've not heard from you. Why have you not written?”“As you will discover it is not permitted for those commanded to the service of The Gods, to communicate with the ones they leave behind.”“Not even their sisters?”“Especially not them, for they might disclose the truth of matters that only The Chosen may know.”“Oh! But I was chosen to become a vestal anyway.”“And now you are not. That's why I came as soon as it was possible. To advise you.”“What do you mean, not to become a vestal? What else can I be?” Diana was confused.Jon paused to gather his thoughts. “Let me first set you aright, for much that we are taught is false; especially, that only those who are married may know and practice sex. Thus it follows that the children of an unmarried woman, like us, must have been conceived without benefit of a man, and are therefore special. Correct?”“Yes, of course.”“It's complete nonsense.”“Then who is our father?”“I know not, except that he must have been a priest.”“But the priests are celibate.”Jon gave a snort. “That is what we are meant to believe. The truth is that a priest may have sex whenever he pleases. I've enjoyed many women in the last two years.”“But where did you, do they, find the women?”“What do you think vestals are for?”“You mean, no I cannot believe it.” Diana was dismayed.“Vestals keep house, but that is secondary. Their main duty is to serve us priests. If you had become a vestal you would have been required to entertain any priest who desired you, and with looks like yours it would not have been long before most would have taken and enjoyed you. Wow, look at you, Diana! You're far more beautiful than I remember! These past two years have been very good to you.”“But what has this to do with being special.”“Well, how do we replace those that go to join the gods? If it were to be with the offspring of priests and vestals it would expose the myth of our purity, and in any case would eventually lead to serious inbreeding. So, at a certain point in their career, each priest is commanded to select from the Common Folk an unmarried woman he fancies, then drug the Eucharist she receives at prayers, divert her to private quarters after mass, then wait for her to pass out. When she finally awakes, she knows nothing of the sexual relations that occurred. But if she conceives, she is publicly esteemed by the priest, for having an immaculate conception. The bastards are the special ones, the replacements, us.”Diana shuddered and studied the floor. “But if I'm not to be a vestal, what am I to be?”“You remember in our lessons they taught us about the war with the nation of Dragonia?”“Yes.”“And how as part of the peace treaty, and to mark our subservience, we are bound to provide an annual tribute?”“Sure.”“What they didn't say was that this tribute is not a tax. That collected tax is diverted to secret clerical treasuries. The actual required Dragonian tribute is only nominal, and takes the form of a maiden. A beautiful young maiden from among the vestals and pledges. She becomes a slave to please and entertain the man who is ruler of Dragonia, The elders have decided that you are to be our tribute for this year.”“But I'm not beautiful.”“Oh my sister, Your humility denies the truth. Everyone else thinks otherwise, and they make the decisions in the Temple. Anyway just accept what comes, for a day or so. It won't be anything serious, at least not until you are given to the Dragonian dictator. I don't know what happens after that. But for now I'll keep an eye out and help where I can. Look, I'll have to go or they'll be wondering where I've disappeared to. Eat that food. Keep your strength up.”Awkwardly Jon leant forward and gave her a brotherly peck on the cheek, then slipped out of the cell door.The InitiationSomewhat perturbed Diana toyed with her food until, some thirty minutes later, two vestals appeared, led her to a room lined with old, cracked tiles, briskly undressed her, bathed her, then clothed her in an ancient red robe.“What happens now,” Diana asked.“You get to be taken to the High Cardinal.” One of the vestals told her. “Come on! He's impatient to know you.”Wearing only his outer dalmatic vesture, the High Cardinal watched as Diana was brought to stand before him. The red shift marking her as a novice was threadbare and at least two sizes too big, only just clinging to the points of her shoulders and leaving bare her slim neck and clavicle. The thin cloth draped itself enticingly around her ample breasts and rippled slightly as she walked, plainly revealing the bulge of her nipples with their dark areola. Her gleaming black hair tumbled down her back in disarray until it nearly touched her tight butt.He said nothing, just looked. He felt his manhood gradually stir and stiffen into readiness. This was one he would relish. Three-and-a-half score years, and more, were behind him but still he had the will and the power to want, ravish and enjoy, although not as often as in his prime. This one would delight him with the softness of those hand filling breasts and the thrusts of his shaft inside her hot, throbbing center. Of the many vestals he'd selected to pleasure him over the years, few had possessed a body to compare with this girl. It was a pity she must be relinquished to the Tribute, but it had to be. At least he would have a use of her before she was sent south.For her part Diana waited uncertainly. The supreme head of the Temple, this holy man, was staring at her most peculiarly. It was as if he wanted, intended, to have her. But no, he couldn't, if Jon was right he could take any woman he wished, so why should he want her? Anyway he was so old. That scrawny neck, those hollow cheeks and drooling lips revolted her. The thought of those liver-spot covered hands roaming across her body, fondling her breasts and caressing her thighs, made her feel sick.“My daughter. It was intended that thou shouldst become a vestal. That our priests, who so devoutly serve the Mighty Gods, might be blessed with some reward for their endeavors by enjoying the pleasures of your body. But on occasion the good of our congregation requires another, higher, sacrifice. We wish it were not so, that we could keep you amongst us, but we must bow before The God's command. Thou art to be our Tribute to The Great Dragon, the ruler of Dragonia, that he may leave us in peace for another year.” The High Cardinal paused, “We do not have to explain, your brother covered it well enough.”“You were listening?”“Do you think we are so imprudent as not to take a few precautions. Of course we heard all that he said, There remains just one item to be confirmed. Your beauty is undeniable, but alone it may not suffice to provide the pleasure to which a ruler is entitled. It is our duty to confirm that you will fully answer his desires.”She was muddled, disjointed, confused. “I don't understand.”Prima Nocta“We must be sure that when he uses you, as a man uses a woman, you will satisfy him. So we must first test your bounty.”“I'm to be mated?”“Yes. It is a chore we will ourselves undertake.”The thought of being taken by him repelled her. His pretense that he was only performing his duty was unconvincing, every word merely echoed his lust for her body.The High Cardinal drew a silk scarf from the pocket of his dalmatic vesture. “But first, since your preference will likely run to youth rather than experience, let us blindfold you. Then you can focus your mind on our skill, not our image.” He fastened the scarf around her eyes.“Now come. Disrobe and let us savor that lovely body with which The Great Gods have blessed you.”What choice did she have? Trembling, she raised her arms and reached behind to unfasten her shift. Lazily it fell to circle her feet. She felt a slight draught caress her body, and shivered as she imagined his eyes on her naked and vulnerable flesh. He would be studying her boobs, her untouched cunni. Tightly she pressed her legs together to hide her nether lips.“Trust us,” he said. “Do all we say and you will have an experience you will never forget.”She managed a faint, “I do not doubt it, Your Grace.”Smiling, pleased with her submissiveness, he looked her up and down, his eyes agleam with desire. His gaze lingering first on her quim with its lush beaver, then on her full, firm tits. His breathing grew harsh, his chest heaved as he reached for her and crushed her to him, the hardness of his erection stabbing her stomach. His palms stroked up and down her back, gently massaging her, feeling the smoothness of her skin; then paused on her hips, slid round to her flat belly and up, up to those adorable boobs. He stopped for a long moment, just cupping them and savoring their firm weight.When he again moved he slowly dragged his palms to and fro across her nipples, feeling them swell, before holding her by the shoulders and easing her to the couch. Firmly he pushed her back until she was lying, her neat buns at the edge, her legs dangling.His hands left her. Diana could hear a rustling, he was removing his dalmatic vesture. Quiet footsteps and she sensed he was beside her again. A light, barely felt touch, brushed her mouth. Her tongue instinctively flicked out to find his finger as he caressed each lip in turn. Then he stroked her cheeks, before dragging his palms down across her chin, her neck, the hollow of her collar bone, smoothing the skin in small circles. When he reached her left breast he pressed gently around the edge spiraling in until he found her bud. It stood high for him to squeeze firmly, sending a bolt of ecstasy straight to her centre. She moaned.The High Cardinal heard her breathing deepen, leant forward and ran his tongue around her other breast. God, she was tasty. His thin lips opened to take her swollen nipple into his mouth. He nipped her with his teeth, sucking her deep.The fingers of his other hand found her cunni. Gently, oh, so gently at first, he stroked her from clit to anus. His fondling grew firmer. He pushed a finger inside to test her dampness, was gratified when she arched her back and pushed her mound into his hand.The scarf was doing its work; she was unable to see him but his heavy breathing and the musky, unmistakable scent of sex was feeding her carnal needs and overcoming her revulsion. Her soft, “Yes, yes,” was music in his ears.“What do you want, my dear?” he asked.Diana barely heard him, all she knew was the rapture of his hands and mouth thrilling her in a way she had never known before. As he rubbed her clit, she began to pant, gave a low moan and dug her nails into his shoulders, then down his back to his hips, instinctively pulling him to her.He held back, in no hurry. She felt him ease himself onto the couch and kneel across her. All the time his tongue licked her nipples, his fingers explored her cunni, testing her wetness but not entering her. Her breathing quickened, she was near to climax. She whimpered, she needed to be filled. He would not let her come. His touch on her swollen cunni lips was feather light, then firm, then light. He seemed to sense her need and to repeatedly rouse and then deny her.She was ready. His fingers parted the soft lips of her center. The helmet of his cock butted them, sliding up and down coating itself with her dampness. He eased away from her, placed a hand to one side to take his weight, his other reaching for her thighs to open her wider before grasping his now totally rigid staff and positioning it at her entrance.She felt it, hard yet soft, probing, pushing her lips apart as the glans slowly entered, forcing deeper and deeper. There was nothing else in the world now but this manhood thrusting, filling, rewarding her. His stroke was slow, his pelvis grinding her clit. She couldn't resist. The tremors started deep inside her then rushed out to explode around his cock.He heard her cry, felt her come, but it was too soon, he wasn't ready yet. He thrust harder, faster; her beauty, her pleasure, her satisfaction were a dim, unimportant memory. All that mattered was his release. His thighs tightened, he shuddered, he whimpered. Hot and hard his seed erupted into her, filling her. He lowered his chest onto her two soft boobs and rested while his heartbeat slowed and the blood drained from his tyrannical probe.Some minutes passed before he rose, resumed his robes and removed the blindfold. “Yes, you will be a worthy Tribute. Would that we had more time to attend to your education ourselves. It would please us greatly to instruct you further. However, the Gods have ordained otherwise. You are required to leave at first light.”“No. Leave that. You deserve better,” he said as she reached to cover herself with the discarded shift. He pulled a cord by the tapestry and she heard the faint chime of a distant bell.The two vestals who had escorted her into his presence entered and genuflected. They were good looking women only a few years older than Diana.“What is the meaning of this rag?” The High Cardinal thrust the shift at them.“But, Your Grace, it is not worth giving her new robes just for the journey. Especially as we are told she will be naked for the presentation ceremony.”“But what if she is seen on the journey. What of her dignity. She deserves your respect. Both of you, remove your robes. Now!”Quaking somewhat at his anger they quickly unfastened their gowns, red with the white edging of senior vestals, and laid them before their feet.“Right,” he turned to Diana, “take your pick. Either should be a reasonable fit.Hesitantly Diana stepped to where, naked, staring at the floor, the two vestals waited. Gingerly she selected the nearest robe and swiftly lowered it over her head, grateful in the draughty room for the residual warmth of it's previous owner.Priest GeorgeThere was a sharp rap on the door. “Come!” Commanded the High Cardinal. The figure that entered was young for a senior priest being but a couple of years older than Diana's brother, but he carried himself with the assurance of one who has already received some prominence in the governing hierarchy.“Ah! George. Well timed.” The High Cardinal frowned at the two Vestals. “We will discuss your performance later. You may withdraw.”Hastily one gathered up the remaining robe and the other the rag that Diana had worn and, still naked, they hurried out of the chamber.“There she is, George,” the old man gestured toward Diana. “You may take her and be on your way. I will expect you back within three weeks.”The young priest bowed his head. “I am honored Your Grace. I will not fail the Gods.” Reaching out he took Diana's hand and drew her from the room.

Ever-timely gems of wisdom from St. John of Kronstadt on prayer. He speaks especially to people living in the world with everyday cares and responsibilities. Anyone discouraged in their prayer life will find consolation and inspiration in these words from this great saint of Russia. 0:00 Introduction 0:09 Perseverance in Prayer 5:17 The Ordering of Prayer 7:49 Hindrances in Prayer 13:03 Despondency in Prayer Reading from _The Spiritual Counsels of Father John of Kronstadt: Selected Passages from My Life in Christ_ , p. 47-56.

A new MP3 sermon from Audiobooks by Horatius Bonar is now available on SermonAudio with the following details: Title: 67 - Human Despondency and Divine Encouragement Subtitle: Light and Truth - Vol 4 Speaker: Horatius Bonar Broadcaster: Audiobooks by Horatius Bonar Event: Audiobook Date: 3/8/1800 Bible: James 5:17 Length: 10 min.

Defeating Despondency Speaker: Tom Hunter Jr

Melinda joins me again on the podcast as we continue our mini series about surviving and thriving in 2024. Today we focus on an interesting article about Getting Out of Despondency. Check out the podcast if you want to know if you are despondent as well as learning some action steps... The post Melinda Schmidt – episode 386 appeared first on Anita Lustrea.

The Bhagavad Gita is one of the most pivotal spiritual texts of all time. Its teachings have been taught for millenia throughout India, and outside of India for the past 100 years or so, inspiring billions with insights into how we can reduce suffering in our own lives.In this episode, Thom gives us a brief introduction to the Bhagavad Gita as a primer for his upcoming three-day course in which he'll take a deep dive into the subject, alongside fellow Vedic Meditation Initiator and Vedic literature aficionado, Jamey Hood. You can find out more about the upcoming course at https://thomknoles.com/bhagavad-gita/.Note: The prerequisite of Thom's new course on the Bhagavad Gita is the completion of a qualified Vedic Meditation training.Episode Highlights:[00:45] Song of God[04:46] The Mahabharata[07:21] Veda Vyasa[10:27] The Kurus[14:02] A Battlefield at Kurukshetra[16:46] A Deal with Krishna[19:05] Arjuna - The Invincible Archer[21:09] I Won't Fight![24:03] The Despondency of Arjuna[26:07] Learning to Meditate on the Battlefield[29:44] Transcend the Problem[31:28] What Makes a War Story so Pivotal?[35:30] Fulfillment is a Consciousness State[37:26] The Ultimate Spiritual Experience[39:13] A Study Course with ThomUseful Linksinfo@thomknoles.com https://thomknoles.com/https://www.instagram.com/thethomknoleshttps://www.facebook.com/thethomknoleshttps://www.youtube.com/c/thomknoleshttps://thomknoles.com/ask-thom-anything/

Early morning English village ambience takes inspiration from Tomas Transtromer's wonderful poem "The Half-Finished Heaven", as we attempt to translate these words into a reimagination of the source sound that evokes some of the simple joy and complex melancholy of a bright summer morning: Despondency breaks off its course. Anguish breaks off its course. The vulture breaks off its flight. The eager light streams out, even the ghosts take a draught. And our paintings see daylight, our red beasts of the ice-age studios. Everything begins to look around. We walk in the sun in hundreds. Each man is a half-open door leading to a room for everyone. The endless ground under us. The water is shining among the trees. The lake is a window into the earth.

Sam and Al discuss readings from “Opening Doors Within” by Eileen Caddy and “24hrs a day” by Richmond Walker. @12steps

On this week's episode, we start off the show with an amazing shout out from Jeff Becerra of Possessed. We talk some rock and metal news with stories on Linkin Park, Knocked Loose, Cradle Of Filth, Iron Maiden, Kreator, Testament, Possessed, and many more. We also have two musical guests this week in Cobra The Impaler and Shroud of Despondency who are this week's bands you should know artists. Follow us on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Twitter.com/pedal_radio⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook.com/eddiespedaltothemetalradioshow⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram.com/pedaltothemetalradioshow⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠pedaltothemetalradioshow.blogspot.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠youtube.com/pedaltothemetalradio --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/edward-gato/support

S10E261: Cicada Boners A rare zombie cicada cycle coming to the states, music legends last meals, a 2,500 year old mummy, exciting things that used to be boring, and heavy metal for your filthy earballs! (00:00:00) - Intro (00:00:56) - Obscure Form, SONG: The Awakening pt. 3. Guilt (00:04:24) - Criminally Insane, SONG: Involuntary Circumcision (00:07:51) - Conversation 1 (00:13:54) - Tonic Breed, SONG: Rebellious Tendencies (00:20:35) - Unborn Generation, SONG: Burst (00:22:56) - Aydra, SONG: Penance Stare (00:27:25) - Conversation 2 (00:37:58) - Grandma's Pantry: Interzone, SONG: Bled Me Dry (00:43:28) - Conversation 3 (00:52:48) - Shroud of Despondency, SONG: The Source of Multiversal Degradation (00:58:07) - Darkthrone, SONG: Black Dawn Affiliation (01:04:07) - Conversation 4 (01:12:20) - Necrophagia, SONG: Mental Decay (01:16:06) - Olde Bard, SONG: The Howling Tundra Labels: Awakening Records, Peaceville Records, Time to Kill Records, Grime Stone Records  

In today's flashback, an outtake from Episode 455, my conversation with author Min Jin Lee. The episode first aired on January 9, 2019. Min Jin Lee is the author of the novels Free Food for Millionaires and Pachinko, a finalist for the National Book Award, and runner-up for the Dayton Literary Peace Prize. In 2022, Lee received the Manhae Grand Prize for Literature, the Bucheon Diaspora Literary Award, and the Samsung Happiness for Tomorrow Award for Creativity from South Korea. She is the recipient of fellowships in Fiction from the Guggenheim Foundation, the Radcliffe Institute of Advanced Study at Harvard, and the New York Foundation for the Arts. Lee is an inductee of the New York Foundation for the Arts Hall of Fame and the New York State Writers Hall of Fame. In 2023, Lee served as the Editor of Best American Short Stories. She is a Writer-in-Residence at Amherst College. She is at work on her third novel, American Hagwon and a nonfiction work, Name Recognition. *** Otherppl with Brad Listi is a weekly literary podcast featuring in-depth interviews with today's leading writers. Available where podcasts are available: Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, etc. Subscribe to Brad Listi's email newsletter. Support the show on Patreon Merch @otherppl Instagram  TikTok Email the show: letters [at] otherppl [dot] com The podcast is a proud affiliate partner of Bookshop, working to support local, independent bookstores. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A new MP3 sermon from Dr. Felker's Expository Preaching is now available on SermonAudio with the following details: Title: Curing Spiritual Despondency Subtitle: Mark Speaker: Dr. Stephen Felker Broadcaster: Dr. Felker's Expository Preaching Event: Sunday Service Date: 1/17/2010 Bible: Mark 8:1-21 Length: 37 min.

A new MP3 sermon from Mount Zion Bible Church is now available on SermonAudio with the following details: Title: The Cure for Despondency Subtitle: Chapel Library AudioBooks Speaker: A. W. Pink Broadcaster: Mount Zion Bible Church Event: Audiobook Date: 1/12/2024 Length: 8 min.

A new MP3 sermon from Mount Zion Bible Church is now available on SermonAudio with the following details: Title: The Cure for Despondency Subtitle: Chapel Library AudioBooks Speaker: A. W. Pink Broadcaster: Mount Zion Bible Church Event: Audiobook Date: 1/4/2020 Length: 8 min.

A devotional study about calling on the LORD urgently, when we are in trouble or discouraged or under duress -- because we do not always start our day from a good or positive place.Psalms 70:1 KJVMake haste, O God, to deliver me; make haste to help me, O LORD.---If you have any questions or comments, please send them to: BibleQuestions@ASBzone.comRelated Podcasts:The Sanctification of King NebuchadnezzarPersistent and Consistent — Prayer LifeTaking  Things for GrantedNow I Know — Religious ExperienceLessons from the Book of JonahHow Should We Relate to the Cares of This Life?  (at TrueWisdom)Who is Predestined?  (at TrueWisdom) Support the show------During many of our podcasts, you will hear us make reference to “The Key Principles of Effective Bible Study,” a document which outlines core concepts shown in the scriptures that will help you better understand many Biblical themes and doctrines. We have done a whole podcast series on these principles which can be found here (https://BibleStudy.ASBzone.com/357512/8572886).Lastly, we recommend that you check out https://TrueWisdom.buzzsprout.com for additional Bible Study podcasts, covering many different Bible topics, and done in a slightly different format from the podcasts on this channel.We pray that all of these resources will be very helpful to you in your Bible Studies.

Scott Galloway is a clinical professor of marketing at the New York University Stern School of Business, a public speaker, entrepreneur and an author. Despondency and cynicism are everywhere online. Some of the most popular modern trends are those that tell people to not hope for the best and that things can never get better. Thankfully I don't agree, and neither does Scott. Expect to learn why Scott recommends all men watch the movie Her, the problem with the left's view on masculinity, what we should be teaching men about how to age gracefully, why we are experiencing a lack of good role models, they keys to networking without being a weirdo, whether you should ban your staff from sleeping with each other, the pillars of masculinity and much more… Sponsors: Get 10% discount on Marek Health's comprehensive blood panels at https://marekhealth.com/modernwisdom (use code: MODERNWISDOM) Get 10% discount on all Gymshark's products at https://bit.ly/sharkwisdom (use code: MW10) Get over 37% discount on all products site-wide from MyProtein at https://bit.ly/proteinwisdom (use code: MODERNWISDOM) Extra Stuff: Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/ Buy my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom - Get in touch. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today's Bible Answer Man broadcast (11/30/23), Hank answers the following questions:Can you explain resurrection in light of 1 Thessalonians 4? (0:51)Is Revelation written to encourage the churches to stand firm in their coming tribulations? (4:51)I've been to churches where people are slain in the spirit. How do you discern whether something is coming from the Spirit? (8:48)My son has terminal cancer and I have been fervently praying for him, but it doesn't seem like God is listening. Does God hate me? (15:42)

In this episode, join the insightful conversation with Dave Albin, CEO of Firewalk Adventures. From selling flowers at nine to becoming a global leader in team building, Dave shares his inspiring journey. Discover the power of firewalking as he delves into transformative experiences, overcoming fear, and the profound paradigm shift it brings. Learn about Dave's pivotal role in leading firewalks for Tony Robbins globally and the creation of the Dave Albin Firewalk Academy. Don't miss this episode that explores personal development, team building, and the extraordinary potential within us.

Ephesians 2:14-22.  Fr. Anthony gives his brain a much needed break by reading the homily.  It's on his favorite theme - harmonious and joyful unity in Christ.  Enjoy the show!    Homily – On Unity (Ephesians 2: 14-22)   The Reading from the Epistle of the Holy Apostle Paul to the Ephesians. [2:14-22]: Christ is our peace, Who has made us both one, and has broken down the dividing wall of hostility, * by abolishing in His Flesh the law of commandments and ordinances, that He might create in Himself one new man in place of the two, so making peace, * and might reconcile us both to God in one body through the Cross, thereby bringing the hostility to an end. * And He came and preached peace to you who were far off and peace to those who were near; * for through Him we both have access in One Spirit to the Father. * So then you are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, * built upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus Himself being the cornerstone, * in Whom the whole structure is joined together and grows into a holy temple in the Lord; * in Whom you also are built into it for a dwelling place of God in the Spirit. The mystery of unity. Unity is one of the primary mysteries of the world. We yearn for it – the desire to be understood, to be recognized, to be loved, to be valued, to be needed – these are all dim reminders that we are called to a deep and enduring fellowship; a fellowship that nurtures us and allows us to nurture others so that we all grow towards God and perfection together. This reality of unity is proclaimed throughout scripture (most powerfully in Christ's High Priestly Prayer found in the Gospel according to St. John, chapter 17). It flows and emanates from the pre-existing foundational reality of the Trinity: three Persons united into one God. Today I want you to note how many times we refer to and pray this reality our liturgy – it permeates our prayers, empowers our Sacraments, and informs every aspect of our faith. It is this unity that St. Paul is professing in today's epistle reading. The specific case he is referring to is the unity of Jews and Gentiles, but this is a subset of a more generalized phenomenon. And it is this phenomenon that I want to address today. If it (unity) really is the answer to so many of our deepest psychological and spiritual needs - to be understood, recognized, loved, needed, valued – needs that have thus far been poorly addressed and misdiagnosed, how is it to be achieved? How can we have the peace that St. Paul promises? The joy that God desires for us?  Three points. 1. Must be recreated. Listen to St. John Chrysostom as he makes this point; Observe thou, that it is not that the Gentile is become a Jew, but that both the one and the other are entered into another condition. It was not with a view of merely making this last other than he was, but rather, in order to create the two anew. And well does he on all occasions employ the word “create,” and does not say “change,” in order to point out the power of what was done, and that even though this creation is invisible, yet it is a real creation, and this must be our starting point….  (St. John Chrysostom, Homily V on Ephesians) The goal is not to make all Americans into Syrians or Syrians into Greeks or Europeans into Africans or Asians into Persians: the point is to make all into something new and greater; a new man, a new woman, and new mankind. To create a new body, a new mind, a new soul. There is a name for this new man, this new Adam – we call him a Christian; and there is a name for the union of such new persons – we call it the Church. 2. Must go through the Cross.  St. Paul makes it clear in today's reading that the way to achieve reconciliation and peace is through the Cross. The Cross destroys the old man, the one that is selfish and small, the one who filters even the best concepts, such as love and charity, through the filter of his own ego. There can be no real union with someone who is only interested in what they get from the other person; who only wants to be a friend to puff themselves up; who only wants to be a lover in order to satisfy himself. This filter of egoism is deeply rooted – the science of psychology demonstrates how our pride affects (and contaminates) everything we do. The problem is that even actions that look good are counter-productive for purposes of true union if they are not done with the proper spirit. Politeness and pretty words may be enough to satisfy the needs of civility and cooperation, but not to achieve the kind of peace that we were made for – and for which we so deeply long. The only way to deal with this deep-rooted weed of pride is to pull it up and destroy it. The only way to fix this old man is to hang him on the cross. It will be painful, but the new man that is resurrected will be capable of so many beautiful things; things that the old man cannot even dream of. He will gain true meaning and lasting happiness. At least, he will gain these things until that weed comes back and the old man rears his ugly head once again. Our first death and recreation take place at baptism – all the others take place at confession (the baptisms of tears) This dynamic of unity and crucifixion is a continual one – until the time when the fruit of the resurrection is enjoyed in its fullness. 3. All members of the union must do it If not? Dysfunction. Lies. Despondency. We know this because we have seen dysfunctional relationships. We have seen the heartbreak it causes when both members of a marriage are not “all in”. We have seen how one spouse will enable the other spouse's egoism in an attempt to make their union last; but unless there is change, unless both partners sacrifice themselves for their love, then this is a false union.  This is why the courting process is so important – and why it really should involve both time and the advice of wise and loving friends and family. We have seen how unequal yoking can destroy people and the institution of marriage itself – this is bad enough. But [as St. Paul points out] marriage is an icon of something even greater: the Church. And the damage done when all its members – and especially its leaders – are not “all in” is even greater. Conclusion: falling in love – and staying there  I fear that I have taken something beautiful and turned it into a bit of a bogeyman. Speaking about crosses can give the wrong idea. It's not all about pain. It's about connection. Not just the connection that comes from falling in love (which is fun), but the harmony that comes from staying there.  There is nothing more enjoyable because it is what we were made for. Christ has destroyed the wall of division.  Through Him we can harmony and holiness through fellowship. So fall in love with Christ; give your heart to Him. Only through Him is such a blessed union possible. It is through Him that we are remade, free from the division and divisiveness of sin.  He was incarnate, suffered and died, and was resurrected for this very purpose. So open your heart to him and give him all your love, all your trust; your mind, your body, and your soul – and then learn to love your neighbor as yourself.  He will grant you peace in Him and with His saints.  This is the joyful unity we are called to, and it is why we are here. Unity through Christ is the purpose of this parish and the reason for our membership in it.

How do we fight despondency or hopelessness? In this episode of Light + Truth, that's the question John Piper answers from Psalm 73:21–26.

An at-home edition of our Sunday worship gathering during Hurricane Hilary. We pray through our liturgy and look at the Scriptures used by the ancient church for this Sunday.

On this episode of March Forth with Mike Bauman, Mike chats with The Art of Deception! Hailing from Pine Grove, Pennsylvania, The Art of Deception is a metal band whose sound continues to expand since the release of their self-titled debut EP in 2015. Blending elements of metalcore, deathcore, death metal, heavy breakdowns, and personal lyrics, The Art of Deception is a force to be reckoned with in metal music. On their latest single "Despondency," The Art of Deception tackles mental health struggles of depression, fear, and uncertainty from a very personal place lyrically, letting listeners know that they're not alone in their own struggles. Since its June 9th release, "Despondency" has amassed nearly 14,000 Spotify streams, while the accompanying music video has received over 15,000 YouTube views. In this podcast, Nolan, Jared, Travis, and Marcus of The Art of Deception have a deep conversation with Mike about mental health struggles, including perseverance through difficult times and negative thoughts, Nolan's heartfelt lyrics on "Despondency" and the meaning behind them, the progression of their sound over the years, their forthcoming EP "Imminence," and more. This episode of March Forth with Mike Bauman also features the aforementioned "Despondency" from The Art of Deception, available where you get your music! Follow The Art of Deception on Instagram @theartofdeceptionofficial. Follow Mike on Instagram @marchforthpod. To stay up-to-date on the podcast and learn more about Mike, visit https://linktr.ee/marchforthpod. Thanks for listening! If ya dug the show, like it, share it, tell a friend, subscribe, and above all, keep the faith and be kind to one another.

Everyone passes through seasons of despondency — seasons when the soul is troubled and hope feels thin. But when does despondency become sin?This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/3279343/advertisement

Everyone passes through seasons of despondency — seasons when the soul is troubled and hope feels thin. But when does despondency become sin?This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/4231678/advertisement

With a lustrous ambient soundtrack of stormy weather threatening TBMG's home, we have a new episode leaning heavily on extreme metal augmented with influences from other spheres of 00s music. Prepare to get weird and drunk dial your old art school girlfriend- we're heading straight to Brooklyn with a lot of this material, but don't fret- there's plenty of great stuff to be found. First off, a look at the new EP by Embodied Torment, an ultra-brutal death metal TDMG favorite, who rise from their gwave with no less intensity but a much developed sense of elaborate, narrative songwriting. First on the docket is the return of Colorado upstarts Astral Tomb, hot off the heels of 2022's "Soulgazer." This newest independent release, "Total Spiritual Death," is a highly experimental and divisive work which will inevitably split audiences on its quality. TDMG likes it a lot, TBMG sort of despises it, and what follows is a wild journey through 00s indie rock, old kosmische musik, and every possibly point in between- with, of course, plenty of Astral Tomb's crawlinggnawinghowling doomdeath intact. Following this is a look at last year's record by Shroud of Despondency, Milwaukee-based experimental/progressive black metallers with affiliations to Prezir, an aggressive black/death/thrash blend we covered some years back. SoD centers on late 90s/early 00s symphonic black metal colored by intense streaks of screamo, neofolk, and industrial. Easy listening this is not, but attention paid is highly rewarded by incredible harmonic density and a potent, unnerving emotional vulnerability. WE SEEK BAD FEELINGS EXCLUSIVELY ON TERMINUS. 0:00:00 - Intro/Embodied Torment - Archaic Bloodshed (New Standard Elite) 0:25:35 - Astral Tomb - Total Spiritual Death (Independent) 1:12:17 - Interlude - Eternal Suffering - “The Death in Your Eyes” fr. Echo of Lost Words (Inherited Suffering Records, 2010) 1:15:09 - Shroud of Despondency - Air of Abrasion (Independent) 1:54:50 - Outro - Anorexia Nervosa - “Mother Anorexia” fr. New Obscurantis Order (Osmose Productions, 2001)

SUN PM SERMONWatch/Listen here using the Embedded Subsplash Playerdiv.sap-embed-player{position:relative;width:100%;height:0;padding-top:56.25%;}div.sap-embed-player>iframe{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;}Central Baptist Church of Ponca City, OKDATE: Sunday PM, July 2, 2023SERMON BY: Bro. Tim PatrickSERMON TITLE: After Emotional Highs, Often Comes Emotional LowsSERMON THEME: The Cure for Despondency SERMON SERIES: Guest SpeakersSERMON VERSES: 1Kings 19:1-18Some causes for dejection…* Unexpected turn of events (blindsided)* Unsuspected trust in OURSELVES* Self-pity* Self-deprecation  God's cure for Elijah's depression * God cared for his physical needs (the meals, water, and rest)* God cared for his emotional needs (led to Sinai by the hand of the LORD)* God cared for his spiritual needs, showing Elijah HIS Power, and then instructing him with His Gentle Voice!1Kings 19:1  And Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and withal how he had slain all the prophets with the sword. 2 Then Jezebel sent a messenger unto Elijah, saying, So let the gods do to me, and more also, if I make not thy life as the life of one of them by to morrow about this time. 3 And when he saw that, he arose, and went for his life, and came to Beersheba, which belongeth to Judah, and left his servant there. 4 But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers. 5 And as he lay and slept under a juniper tree, behold, then an angel touched him, and said unto him, Arise and eat. 6 And he looked, and, behold, there was a cake baken on the coals, and a cruse of water at his head. And he did eat and drink, and laid him down again. 7 And the angel of the LORD came again the second time, and touched him, and said, Arise and eat; because the journey is too great for thee. 8 And he arose, and did eat and drink, and went in the strength of that meat forty days and forty nights unto Horeb the mount of God.1Kings 19:9   And he came thither unto a cave, and lodged there; and, behold, the word of the LORD came to him, and he said unto him, What doest thou here, Elijah? 10 And he said, I have been very jealous for the LORD God of hosts: for the children of Israel have forsaken thy covenant, thrown down thine altars, and slain thy prophets with the sword; and I, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away. 11 And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the LORD. And, behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD; but the LORD was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the LORD was not in the earthquake: 12 And after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice. 13 And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah? 14 And he said, I have been very jealous for the LORD God of hosts: because the children of Israel have forsaken thy covenant, thrown down thine altars, and slain thy prophets with the sword; and I, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away. 15 And the LORD said unto him, Go, return on thy way to the wilderness of Damascus: and when thou comest, anoint Hazael to be king over Syria: 16 And Jehu the son of Nimshi shalt thou anoint to be king over Israel: and Elisha the son of Shaphat of Abelmeholah shalt thou anoint to be prophet in thy room. 17 And it shall come to pass, that him that escapeth the sword of Hazael shall Jehu slay: and him that escapeth from the sword of Jehu shall Elisha slay. 18 Yet I have left me seven thousand in Israel, all the knees which have not bowed unto Baal, and every mouth which hath not kissed him.— — —Watch/Listen here using our Subsplash WebShare Playerhttps://cbcponca.subspla.sh/fjvhysxListen here on Archive.orghttps://archive.org/download/070223-pm-facebook-stream/070223PM-FacebookStream.mp3

Things we talk about in this episode. Congrats to Katelyn for getting assigned the 2023 Women's World Cup in New Zealand & Australia. Why I follow Morgan Housel & why I think you should too. And a Big Thank You to my wife Deanne for co-hosting a number of episodes in Season 6.   SAVING The most valuable personal finance asset is not needing to impress anyone. Less Ego, more wealth. The lower ego you can have to signal how successful you are with fancy stuff, the more savings you will have. The more savings, the more freedom over your time. Savings can be created by spending less. You can spend less if you desire less. And you will desire less if you care less about what others think of you. Saving money is the gap between your ego and your income. You can save for savings sake. Everyone should. Only saving for a specific goal makes sense in a predictable world. Saving is a hedge against life's inevitable ability to surprise the hell out of you at the worst possible moment. WEALTH The fastest way to get rich is to go slow. Three legal investment strategies: Be smarter than others, be luckier than others, be more patient than others. That's the whole list. The best measure of wealth is what you have minus what you want. (By this measure, some billionaires are broke.) Compounding doesn't rely on earning big returns. Merely good returns sustained uninterrupted for the longest period of time will always win.  Net worth goes from $0 to $1 million: Ecstasy. Net worth goes from $10 million to $1 million: Despondency. Can we agree that all wealth is relative? LEARNING Every five to seven years people forget that recessions occur every five to seven years. Warren Buffett didn't panic and sell through 14 recessions he has lived through.There are two types of people: Those who want to know more and those who want to defend what they already know. Few traits are as attractive as humility, but few are as common as vanity. Schools are good at measuring intelligence but not great at measuring passion, endurance, and character, which tend to be more important than intelligence in the long run. A good bet in economics: the past wasn't as good as you remember, the present isn't as bad as you think, and the future will be better than you anticipate. Where to Find Morgan Housel Morgan's Book   The Psychology of Money- Came out in March of 2021 Morgan's Blog    https://collabfund.com/blog/ Morgan's Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-morgan-housel-podcast/id1675310669 Morgan on You Tube. You can easily find 20 plus interviews with Morgan, Here is one I really enjoyed.    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJe0sfEYCrg&t=310s

Psalm 88 (ESV)Andrew and Edwin dig into Psalm 88 and its deep dive into dark times. This psalm is what happens when a person gets stuck in the valley.Read the written devo that goes along with this episode by clicking here.    Let us know what you are learning or any questions you have. Email us at TextTalk@ChristiansMeetHere.org.    Join the Facebook community and join the conversation by clicking here. We'd love to meet you. Be a guest among the Christians who meet on Livingston Avenue. Click here to find out more. Michael Eldridge sang all four parts of our theme song. Find more from him by clicking here.   Thanks for talking about the text with us today.________________________________________________If the hyperlinks do not work, copy the following addresses and paste them into the URL bar of your web browser: Daily Written Devo: https://readthebiblemakedisciples.wordpress.com/?p=12780The Christians Who Meet on Livingston Avenue: http://www.christiansmeethere.org/Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/TalkAboutTheTextFacebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/texttalkMichael Eldridge: https://acapeldridge.com/ 

Are you in a season of feeling very uneasy, depressed, racing thoughts, anxiety, or do you have a close friend going through this? In today's episode, we are going to do a deep look at what to do in those moments and trust that we are doing the right thing in those moments.

Chris Hathcock is known as creative mind and songwriter for the progressive metal band, The Reticent. Chris is also known as a Grammy nominated music educator, and is one of the most interesting, and challenging, humans I've met over my years as a performing artist.I've known Chris for awhile now, and in that time, I've fallen in love with his musical projects. I've also witnessed him suffer traumatic loss at an almost legendary scale. Like all of us, Chris has lost family members and friends over the years, including his father, whom Chris was incredibly close. His father's passing has resulted in Chris creating a new album project where he lays his life and feelings bare in the rarest of ways. You want to reach through his songs to help him heal, but wildly enough, the very reason you want to do that IS because his words and theme touch your aching heart as well. It's quite something to experience.So, this said, I can only warn you that today is not your typical light conversation about an upcoming band or a cautionary tale of celebrity. This is Chris Hathcock, uncompromisingly authentic and desperately seeking anything or anyone that will bring him out of the deep dark hole he's been trapped in as far back as he can remember. This is a conversation about mental illness, surviving it, and admitting that thriving within it doesn't just seem hopeless, but impossible.This is a conversation about the most ugly truths. This is a real life deep dive with my friend, Chris Hathcock, on a very important Rockstar Superhero.Time codes:2:00 The impossibility of now3:35 Panel discussions6:30 Faltering when things are close to the edge11:00 Distracting oneself15:20 Making himself stronger 20:20 Carried offstage 25:20 Hearing a smile on the phone31:30 Flattering messages37:30 Finding out about The Reticent 43:00 The Old Guard47:45 Giving to charities 52:40 Despondency and sadness 57:50 Missing the opportunities of love1:03:00 Behavioral Therapy1:08:00 Misunderstanding praise 1:13:00 Extraordinary writing abilities1:17:00 A window into another mind1:22:00 Real excited about the upcoming tour1:27:00 Getting away from it when it's too much 1:31:00 Super cool mixing techniques1:35:00 Affecting the lives of those that listen to the show todaySubscribe to both shows here: https://bit.ly/3airCvh Wanna be on the show?Go here: https://calendly.com/rockstarsuperheroThe Rockstar Superhero Podcast examines the personal lives and creative careers of your favorite classic rock artists. We are obsessed with understanding the inner workings of the music business and all that it takes to remain in the public eye for as long as possible. Join us as we pursue conversations with legends and legends in the making.The Rockstar Superhero Radicals podcast was created to connect you directly to people, professional and private, who have lived lives worth discussing and offer solutions to our listeners, one heart at a time. If you are seeking truth and purpose beyond yourself, the Radicals podcast is for you.Copyright 2023 Rockstar Superhero Podcast - All Rights ReservedBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/rockstar-superhero--4792050/support.

How do we talk about and understand despondency? I never heard about the word or the nature of the vice until I was in my 20s and after having read the fathers. And yet we hear from the fathers that it is the greatest and gravest of the eight capital vices. It afflicts the soul in such a way that it draws it into darkness. The soul loses its capacity to see the presence of God or to love the things of God. It becomes most dangerous when we are engaged in the spiritual life in isolation; either as those who live the life of a hermit, or as those who see the spiritual life as a private affair.  We live in a radical solidarity with each other, and with God. Our understanding of this, and our embrace of that reality may be the one thing that keeps us from falling into a general death.  This demon uses the most subtle forms of temptation to make us lax in our spiritual practice or come to despise it all together. There are very few remedies for it for this reason. One must remember death and the brevity of our life. We must understand that we are in the end times and see the urgency of the moment. We must also cling to obedience; placing our thoughts before another and allow them to guide us when we cannot see the path before us.  Prayer filled with hope, St. John tells us, is the only thing that brings this vice to utter death. Only when we cling to He who is life and love and hope and let go of the illusion that we can simply endure the spiritual trials of this world on our own will this vice be conquered. But once it is conquered, a person has come to experience all that is good; they are prepared for every spiritual battle that lies ahead. --- Text of chat during the group: 00:19:17 David: Question on translation: Acedia wouldn't this be closer to insouciant or melancholy rather than despondency?   00:35:37 Daniel Allen: Despondency is a child of talkativeness but community life is opposed to it? That seems sort of contradictory.   00:37:21 Anthony: The spirit of despondency also perverts a concept of what it means to be "elect": I am the only true one, everyone is against me."  That's not a good place to be.   00:37:51 Daniel Allen: As a follow up it seems that despondency is always a lurking threat.   00:38:32 Daniel Allen: Ok that clears it up thank you   00:41:21 Cindy Moran: Noonday Devil from Ps 90:6 [DRV]   00:43:22 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: Also, many monks would not eat before 3 pm so beginning around midday hunger and hungers may start.   00:46:55 Anthony: The dinner bell represents hope that suffering will end.   00:59:02 Kathy: What do you mean by deification?   01:00:26 Eric Ewanco: Deification is become by grace what Christ was by nature -- becoming God-like, sharing in the divinity of Christ as he shared in our humanity, being partakers of the divine nature (2 Peter 1:3-4)   01:01:26 Anthony: A great Roman Catholic imagery / interpretation of deification is in Dante's "Paradiso," especially the later cantos.   01:02:14 Kathy: Thanks   01:06:45 Daniel Allen: St Therese - “May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.”   01:06:59 Kristen Brotemarkle: beautiful quote, thanks for sharing that. ^   01:09:55 Liz: Sorry, what´s the name of the author Father is talking about?   01:10:26 Anthony: Paul Evdekimov   01:10:32 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: Paul Evdokimov   01:10:35 Liz: Thank you!!!   01:18:25 Ambrose Little, OP: Gender equality. Very modern.   01:20:56 Jeff O.: It seems like despondency (and gluttony as well) have a tendency or propensity to draw us towards numbing…which, paired with the nature of our culture which attempts to provide numbing or comforting in all things seems like an almost double whammy of sorts…   01:21:34 Anthony: Reacted to "It seems like desp..." with

John talks to Kevin Monroe — gratitude expert, creator and curator of the Grateful App, founder of X Factor Consulting, keynote speaker, emcee, host of the Gratitude Encounter Moments Podcast, loving husband, father, and grandfather. Listen to this episode to learn more: [00:00] - Welcome notes and Kevin's intro [05:49] - Kevin's journey to becoming the World's Gratitude Coach [15:28] - The distinction between gratitude and thankfulness [17:31] - The significant impact of expressing genuine appreciation to others [20:04] - "I'm Grateful For You" cards [21:28] - How the "I'm Grateful For You" cards impact people [24:53] - How to get your own "I'm Grateful For You" cards [25:54] - The need for change in the current work environment  [29:29] - Gratitude is the gateway to abundance [33:20] - The quickest way out is through gratitude [34:02] - Discovering your gratitude [37:56] - Kevin's personal experience with depression [45:20] - The deadly D's: Discouragement, Despair, Despondency, Depression NOTABLE QUOTES: "Before your feet hit the floor when you get out of bed in the morning, think of three things you're thankful for." "The single biggest difference between being thankful and being grateful is thanks can be transactional. Gratitude is transformation." "Gratitude is simply lingering longer in a spirit of thanksgiving." "If you want to make a difference, let your gratitude be simple and sincere." "Gratitude is the appreciation for all that we have. All that we are and thankfulness for our ability to show love and kindness to others." "Gratitude leads to peace of mind, which allows wise choices and better outcomes." "As long as you have a pulse, you have a purpose." "People need to realize that even the folks who look like they have it all together struggle, and that really figuring out what life is all about and how to make it better comes through the struggle, not the avoidance of it." "The biggest risk you'll take is to take no risk at all." BOOK MENTIONED: The Abundance Loop: 8 Steps to Manifest Conscious Wealth by Juliana Park (https://tinyurl.com/TheAbundanceLoopBook) USEFUL RESOURCES: https://www.kevindmonroe.com https://www.imgratefulforyou.co https://www.thisextraordinary.life https://www.instagram.com/kevin_d_monroe/ https://twitter.com/kevin_monroe?lang=en https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevinmonroe/ https://www.youtube.com/@KevinMonroe_LivingInGratitude https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63597bd438b18e2c9101b592 CONNECT WITH JOHN Website - https://thejohnhulen.com     Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/johnhulen     Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/johnhulen     Twitter - https://www.twitter.com/johnhulen     LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/johnhulen     YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLX_NchE8lisC4NL2GciIWA     EPISODE CREDITS Intro and Outro music provided by Jeff Scheetz - https://jeffscheetz.com/ 

Everyone passes through seasons of despondency — seasons when the soul is troubled and hope feels thin. But when does despondency become sin?

There's light at the end of every difficulty you face. You don't have to give in to despondency.

We're back with part 2 of the eight evil thoughts. This week Mother Natalia covers anger, dejection/sloth, listlessness/acedia, vainglory, and pride.References:Part One: Three of Eight Evil ThoughtsThe PhilokaliaAntirrhetikos (or Talking Back) by EvagriusTime and Despondency by Nicole RoccasFollow and Contact Us!Follow us on Instagram and FacebookWe're on YouTube!Join our Goodreads GroupFr. Michael's TwitterChrist the Bridegroom MonasteryOur WebsiteOur NonprofitSupport the show

In this episode Samuel Dutschmann, College Conference Midwest Student Leader, is joined by author, podcaster, and trauma coach, Nicole Roccas. They discuss despondency in the life of college students. Nicole shares insights from her work and how students might work through these restless moments of our lives.

In this episode Samuel Dutschmann, College Conference Midwest Student Leader, is joined by author, podcaster, and trauma coach, Nicole Roccas. They discuss despondency in the life of college students. Nicole shares insights from her work and how students might work through these restless moments of our lives.

Father Jim Goins joins IL for a lively conversation about this capital sin. We covered: the deadly sins (6:48), the difference between rest and sloth (10:59), what the noonday devil is (16:46), how sloth creeps into our daily lives (23:17), how we overcome sloth (28:31), caller: what a nun told me about boredom (33:03), caller: book recommendation Time and Despondency (41:59), scriptural passages to help with sloth (43:37), and how to help someone who is slothful (48:18).  

There is one absolute constant in our lives; that is, our thoughts continuously being painted on the canvas of our minds. Today we look at the importance of taking our thoughts captive in order to discern whether they are truths that leads us to the experience of God in that moment; or, whether they are thoughts intended to deny us the blessed fellowship with God throughout the day. Our enemy is always at work trying to remove us from being truly present in the moments of our lives which denies God the opportunity that He so desires; to manifest His presence for us in those very moments.

Spiritual despondency, simply stated, is the spiritual slumber of the soul that disconnects us from the beautiful and eternal value of the experience of God in the precious moments of our lives. When we are in a state of spiritual slumber, we can never recognize for ourselves just how asleep we really are or why we are in that spiritual slumber. We need the illumination of Christ to both reveal our spiritual slumber as well as to wake us up again so that we can truly live. It is time to regain the gift of moments with God in the little time we have.

Season 7 let's go!  #REAPERREVIEWS with Theo and Kim Coates aka Tig & Juice Time is back. On this episode, they sit down to discuss "Faith and Despondency" Season 7 Episode 9 of Sons of Anarchy.  Head over to Theo & Kim's Patreon page for access to their NEW SHOW: "THEOry with Theo Rossi & Kim Coates" and exclusive access to our THEOry community where you can chat with the THEOry team, fans and reap all of the benefits! Don't forget to leave your review on Apple podcasts with your favorite episode for a chance to have it reviewed by Theo and Kim!

In the Story Pilgrim's Progress, Christian and his companion Pliable, while fleeing from the city of Destruction, fall into a bog called The Slough of Despond. Pliable climbs out by himself and heads back the way he came. Christian is pulled out by a person called Help who asked Christian, "Why did you not look for the steps?" Christians can fall into despondency where they lose sight of the hope and sink into inactivity. In Psalm 13 we discover the steps out of despondency. Listen to find out the steps will help lift us out.Time:MorningMinister:Pastor Taylor KernTexts:Psalm 13Series:Summer in the Psalms

Kate Chopin - The Awakening - Episode 4 - Symbolism, Romanticism, Nihilism And A Dissonant Ending!   Hi, I'm Christy Shriver. We're here to discuss books that have changed the world and have changed us.    I'm Garry Shriver, and this is the How to Love Lit Podcast.  This is our final episode in our four-part series of Kate Chopin's masterpiece The Awakening.  There is a lot layered in such a short book.  In episode 1, we discuss Chopin's life, we introduce the concept of “local color” and we arrive on the colorful shores of a summer resort village in Grand Isle, Louisiana.  Episode 2 we spend time on Grand Isle.  We meet Edna, Adele, Mr. Pontellier, Robert Lebrun and Madame Reisz.  We watch Edna awaken to an inner awareness she had never understood before, and we see this awakening occur through a physical sensuality she has never experienced before.  She learns to swim.  Edna Pontellier leaves Grand Isle a very different person than how she arrived at the beginning of her summer. Episode  3 we start with chapter 18 as Edna arrives back home in New Orleans.  Nothing would be the same.  She cannot  conform to the roles she has previously played.  She does not fit into the culture; she doesn't want to anymore.  She abandons almost all that she had previously identified with and experiments with different lifestyles: the arts, the horse races, men, ultimately she decides to leave the ritzy Esplanade street and take up residence in what she calls her Pigeon House just around the corner.  Today, we begin with chapter 26 and we follow Edna's progression through the end of the book.       Stylistically Chopin wrote what we call a realistic novel. The story, the settings, the characters truthfully represent the real world.  Grand Isle really exists and the resort there existed in the way she described it.  The same is true for Esplanade Street.  The details are accurate as Chopin represents the reality the great city of New Orleans at the turn of the century.  The French language, the customs, the way people behave, the races, the music, even the Song, “Ah, si tu savais”…is a real song. All of these things reflect reality.   However, as we get farther to the end of the novel, and as the reader gets more submerged into Edna's perspective, things get more and more romanticized.  Objects that seemed liked just objects at the beginning are now understood to be metaphorical and are symbolic.  We notice that objects are repeating and evolving- they are motifs.   In other words, the objects are still what they have always been, but they have taken on to mean MORE than just what they originally meant.  We understand things to be symbols in two ways.  The first way is whey the author spends an inordinate amount of time describing something that maybe isn't THAT important otherwise.  A second way is when we notice something to keep showing up over and over again.  Here's one example  There is music in the beginning.  It's described in detail, but notice just how much music there is in this book.  Notice how much time is devoted to describing it.   There is music in the middle and there is music at the end.  It means something, but of course it's up to us to draw our own conclusions as to what.  The birds work the same way.  There are birds on the first page, they come back in the middle and there is a bird on the last page.  It means something.  Food and meals are often symbolic.  Meals are archetypal symbols for fellowship.   Chopin use meals as a way to sort track what's going on with Edna and her relationships throughout the story.  Following the symbols helps us understand the universality of the story.  The biggest symbol is the sea, and by the end of the book it takes on mythic proportions.  The sea, as we pointed out in the beginning is personified.  It's alive.  But by the end, if we look carefully, we see in the description that the ocean is described as a serpent- uh ohh.  That's a Biblical symbol- but even in the Bible a serpent is not just one thing.  But it's not just the Bible that that is alluded here in these ocean references.  Edna as called Venus, and Venus emerges from the sea. What is that about? Although everything is still realistic- there are no superheroes or magic or pirates or fairies of any kind, there symbols somehow feel allegorical; is Edna even a real person or is she a type?  I know that's a little hyperbolic, but not by much.  Today as we end our discussion, I'd like to see this book as indeed political; there certainly is that side of it, but that is just the surface.  It goes beyond that to ask questions that are personal.  But before we can do that, we must first address the political.  Chopin was, by her very essence, a woman in the vein of what Europeans of her day called the “New Women” of the fin de siècle.    Garry, Chopin, was a well-read French speaker and reader very attune to the political, social and literary movements of her day, but we are not- although I will say, I've learned a lot about new women by watching them evolve in Downton Abbey, but what is a “new woman” and what does the term “fim de siècle” mean beyond the obvious translation of end of the century.    The term “New Woman” was actually an invention of the British media- it's not an American thing- and you're right, it's showcased in a lot of period pieces.  Here's one tell, a new woman might be the one riding a bicycle as a display of her independence.    A bicycle.  That's funny.      You'd have been the first to get your hands on one, I'm sure.  Think about it; just being able to wear clothes that would allow you to ride it would be liberating.  Anyway, the term first came out in the The Woman's Herald in August of 1893.  To use the newspaper's words, “woman suddenly appears on the scene of man's activities, as a sort of new creation, and demand a share in the struggles, the responsibilities and the honurs of the world, in which, until now, she has been a cipher.”  This feminist vision, as you can imagine was highly controversial and threatening to the status quo.  Among other things, it involved a new definition of female sexuality.  Some considered this alone to be the beginning of the apocalypse- the world was certainly turning upside down.  The mainstream media portrayed the new woman as a mannish brute towering over men- someone who is extremely hideous and monstrous- something most women obviously would not want to embrace- very propagandic.  Opponents were making caricatures as negative as possible of these “independent women”  wearing masculine clothes and pursuing unwomanly pursuits like sports, politics or higher education.     How dare they?    There was a lot of cigar smoking in these pictures.  These were meant to be negative images; the women would have angry faces, maybe with their hands on their hips scowling at the reader.  But in the feminist media, the new woman was portrayed very differently.  The traits were the exact same but portrayed in a positive way.  The new woman in these publications  was portrayed as a social warrior defending her home, using her political positions, social standings to compliment traditional household duties.  The idea being a new woman didn't neglect her family she was a better provider and defender of self and family because of it.  The main difference between these new visions of a new woman had to do with what you do with motherhood.   Femininist media created images of women incorporating traditionally male domains not necessarily excluding motherhood.   The big political interests that stand out were women's suffrage and property rights. Women were interested in careers outside the home and higher education.   Women's periodicals emerged with pretty large readerships, and not all of these readers were women.  Women were publicly and in writing asking other women to openly express their views on contemporary life- this was new.  The question of the era was “What is the role of the ‘new woman'?” I quote the North America Review here, “the great problem of the age is how to emancipate woman and preserve motherhood.”   In the 1890s, the new woman wanted to be what some called a “respected radical”.      And of course, we don't have to get far into The Awakening to see these political and social concerns embedded in Chopin's work.  She is a voice speaking to this socio-political moment in time, and she's commenting in a serious way on women's struggle to speak- Edna struggles to speak for herself at everyone point in the book.  Interestly enough, Edna didn't have a mother and doesn't know what to do with motherhood.  She had no personal role model.    I noticed that, and it matters psychologically when we watch Edna vacillate at the end of the book.  Chopin created a character of extreme economic privilege for her day, yet still, Edna has terrible trouble articulating even to herself what she feels or what she wants.   The reasons for this are not simply resolved.  Chopin seems to suggest to me that for sure there are political, social and cultural adjustments that must be made giving women more rights, but that's just one part of it.  Chopin illustrates this from the vantage point of a woman.  There must be a redefinition of respectable womanhood that is not so polarizing.  Here there are only two versions of respectable women-  Madame Reisz and the other Adele Ratignole.     By chapter 26 Edna clearly understands she is not one or the other, but there is an inarticulate lostness.  Where does Edna fit in?  She tells Madame Reisz that she's moving out of her home, and for a brief moment you wonder if she's got some sort of radical plan, except she doesn't and her reasons don't even make a lot of sense.  They're emotional. She's literally moving  “just two steps away in a little four-room house around the corner.  It looks so cozy, so inviting a restful, whenever I pass by, and it's for rent.  I'm tired looking after that big house.  It seemed seemed like mine, anyway- like home.  It's too much trouble.  I have to keep too many servants.  I am tired bothering with them.”  She goes on to say when Madame Reisz doesn't buy that explanation, “The house, the money, that provides for it are not mine.  Isn't that enough reason?”    Obviously those are NOT reasons enough- what does she get out of this move? When Madame Reisz asks how her husband reacted to this plan this is her response, “I have not told him.   I only thought of it this morning.”      Very impulsive.    SOO impulsive.  I'm ashamed to say, I know people that do things like this, but this is not my vision of the real pioneers of the women's movement- not today or from the turn of the century- women like Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Isadora Duncan, Clara Burton, Mary Wollstonecraft- they aren't anything like Edna Pontellier.    Well, no they are not, Edna has some deficiencies for sure, and they express themselves in various ways.  One of these is expressed through this confusion of passion with relationship like we see with Robert LeBrun.   She indulges in fantasy which is fun, of course, and the idea of Robert is a wonderful fantasy.    This is something else that frustrates me, personally, with Edna. I keep wanting to say, “snap out of it, child!”  Chopin builds this tension but she never lets Edna snap out of it.  And even though the title of this book is The Awakening, and it is true is that Edna awakens continuously throughout the book, There is another sense paradoxically where Edna is always asleep literally and figuratively.  Edna is not a villain; Edna is not a pathetic character; Edna is a realistic character who vacillates all the time between this illusion and reality.  She's continually uncovering things that haven't been real, but then constructing things that are totally fake- like her life in this pigeon house or her relationship with Robert. Unpacking Edna is seeing a real life- a struggle. Chopin's evolutionary character awakens from a very female - not a male one, not a neutered life; the complexity derives from realities that are unique to women, specifically those from the turn of the century, but the social and culture implications aside, in universal terms, what does it mean for Edna to be in love with Robert?  To love someone means something in a universal way.  People love in all cultures in all times all around the world.  For a woman to love a man as she claims to love Robert, what does she mean?  Is she saying she desires a life with him; does she want to take on any responsibility for his happiness or good?  That is what I find confusing, because Edna doesn't seem to be doing that for anyone.  In what sense is Edna “in love” or should we not take her at her word on this?        Ha!  Do we take anyone at their word when they are “in love”?  Of course, when she is asked to describe what she means, she describes the biochemical addiction we all feel when we can't get enough of another person.  That experience is overwhelming for anyone; and Chopin has gone to a lot of trouble to show us that Edna has never been “in love” before.  Edna is a woman who recently just turned on her feelings.  Turning on our feelings is important, and it is very sad that it was so long in happening for her.  Contrary to popular opinion, feelings are good.  To experience feelings is not a sign of weakness. Not taking into account her feelings is what got her into a loveless marriage to begin with.  We have to learn to incorporate our emotions if we are going to live as a whole individual- a person with no dead spots.  Edna has lived from her childhood onward with lots of dead spots.  This has handicapped her in many ways.  In this case, what does it mean for Edna in Edna's mind to love Robert LeBrun?  What does it mean if he loves her?  I'm not sure the relationship between these two is what is important for Chopin.  It appears to be the backdrop of a larger issue?  Love is not the end game for Edna; passion was the catalyst to her awakening, to be sure, but the relationship between Edna and Robert is not a Romeo and Juliet type story.  The Awakening is not a love story.    Indeed, Madame Reisz recognizes that as well.  Madame Reisz calls Edna “Ma Reine” in chapter 26.  She then asks, “Why do you love him when you ought not?”       And why does that term “ma reine” draw your attention?    Because that term means, “My queen”, and that seems to be more in line what Edna wants instead of a relationship with Robert LeBrun.  What has Edna discovered in this world.  She's discovered she doesn't want to be woman-mother.  She discovered she doesn't really want to be artist woman.  She's trying out what it's like to be a “man” in some ways.  But really what she wants is to be Woman-queen.  Which is a nice role- I'd like that to be that one as well.    Ha!  Not a Disney princess.    Heck no- I'm all for mother-queen.  But here's Edna'a problem.  She's not prepared nor does she seem creative enough to invent this role for herself in the actual real world in which she lives; she likely can't conceptualize it.  This illusion of a mother-queen will be the model from here to the end of the book.  The thing is, it's not real; Edna is creating an illusion.  In fact, this whole book is a discussion on illusion versus reality.  What did Edna awaken to, if not to the understanding that her entire life was an illusion- she was living an inauthentic life.  Except, look at what she does in response to that?  She's building more illusion- exhibit A-  this relationship with Robert- if it is anything it is an expression of illusion.      Edna doesn't need a fantasy.  She needs hope.  She needs to see her own potential- a creative vision of what she can become, something she would like to become- if not mother, if not artist, if not horse-racer, if not socialite, then what.    In chapter 27, Edna says this “Don't you know the weather prophet has told us we shall see the sun pretty soon?”  The sun is a very ancient and universal symbol.  It represents hope.  It represents creativity; it's a male archetypal symbol, btw, the sun represents energy.  If you remember, Edna can only paint in the sun, and that's exactly right.  That's all of us, we all can only create in the sun.  We can only move forward when we have hope.  The Sun gives us life and without it we live in darkness, without hope.  Edna is wrestling with finding hope, but that seems to be problematic because she can't even decide if she's a good person or a bad person.  Listen to what she says to Arobin, “I'm going to pull myself together for a while and think- try to determine what character of a woman I am; for, candidly I don't know.  By all the codes which I am acquainted with, I am a devilish wicked specimen of the sex.  But some way I can't convince myself that I am.  I must think about it.”      It is in that line that I think Chopin enraptures many female readers.  I want to read it again, “  By all the codes which I am acquainted with, I am a devilish wicked specimen of the sex.  But some way I can't convince myself that I am.  I must think about it.”      In other words, the world tells me I am a bad person because I'm not conforming properly.  I'm not doing the right things; but something inside of me defies that.  I don't feel devilish.  But I'm told I am, and there is my disconnect.    Indeed-and isn't it interesting that it is here at this point that Edna revisits something Madame Reisz has apparently told her previously but we are only getting to see in this context after this confession, “When I left her today, she put her arms around me and felt my shoulder blades, to see if my wings were strong, she said, ‘the bird that would soar above the level plain of tradition and prejudice must have strong wings.  It is a sad spectacle to see the weaklings bruised, exhausted, fluttering back to earth.”    I agree, but what kind of bird is Edna?  Madame Reisz is not using language that suggest Edna IS this kind of woman.  She's challenging her to be a certain way.  She's saying if Edna wants to have a certain outcome, she must display certain characteristics.  But, notice the next thing that happens, Edna and Arobin kiss passionately.  “It was the first kiss of her life to which her nature had really responded.  It was a flaming torch that kindled desire.”  Chopin is very delicate in how she expresses the implied sex scene.  The entire chapter is very short- very different than how Shonda Rimes does these things in Bridgerton.  Let's read it.    Chapter 28    I know this is not the majority view here, but this is not only Edna asserting independence.  This is Edna running into more illusion. From here, she immediately moves out of Leonce's house, but not without running up a crazy expensive bill with a lavish dinner party.  Arobin calls it a coup d'etat.  “It will be day after tomorrow.  Why do you call it the coup d'etat?  Oh! It will be a very fine; all my best of everything- crystal, silver, and gold. Sevres. Flowers, music and champagne to swim in.  I'll let Leonce pay the bills.  I wonder what he'll say when he sees the bills.”    This dinner party is very strange.  For a book so short, why should so many pages be devoted to a dinner party that is essentially meaningless in terms of plot development.      It is long.  One critic pointed out that it's literally, “the longest sustained episode in the novel.”     So, why?  It does not develop the plot; it does not develop any characters; nothing provocative is uttered.  What is going on?    Well!!!  Meals are never just meals- not in literature, not in the movies.  In fact, food is never just food.  It's almost always symbolic of something.  Food is so essential to life, in fact it IS life,  but meals are essential to community.  They don't just symbolize fellowship- they ARE fellowship.  This Thursday night we are going to celebrate our niece, Lauren,  graduating from Collierville High School, and how are we going to do this, we are going to eat together.  Eating together is bonding.  With that in mind, notice how many meals are consumed in this story.      So, what's with the dinner Edna holds?  Her family isn't there.  Her husband isn't there.  Adele, her closest friend, isn't even there.  Many literary critics have suggested, and I honestly think there is validity to this, that Chopin is creating a parody of Jesus' last supper.  Edna has invited a select 12 to join her on her birthday dinner.  There's irony there.  In some sense, it's not just a day where she is celebrating turning 29.  She sees herself as being reborn- her birth…day.  She is celebrating her departure, but unlike Jesus' humble meal in the upper room before his crucifixion and resurrection- Edna goes high dollar.  She sits at the end of the table presiding over her dinner guests, who all have a magnificent time, btw. She wears a cluster of diamonds she had just received that morning from her husband.   There is a specially designed cocktail her father invented for her sister's wedding that she didn't attend; there are multiple courses, everyone has a special chair.  Everything was queenly.  Let me read the description of Edna, “The golden shimmer….    Page 103    Madame Reisz on her way out at the end of the party again says this, “Bonne nuit, ma reine, soyez sage.”  Translated- Good night, my queen, be wise.”    Well, you've made your case…she is playing the part of the queen. But who are the other people in this charade?  Specifically, why is  Mrs. Highcamp there who we know she doesn't like, and why is she weaving a garland of yellow and red roses and laying it over Victor…according to Chopin transforming Victor into a vision of oriental beauty, his cheeks the color or crushed grapes and his dusty eyes glowed with a languishing fire. After that she drapes a while silk scarf on him. It's just weird…and pagan feeling…nothing like the Lord's Supper of the bible, if you were trying to make that comparison.      No, it's the very opposite. That's why critics say it's a parody of Jesus' last supper.  It's imitating but not recreating.  It feels pagan, doesn't it?   Edna is Queen but she has no stated purpose; she is not Jesus sacrificing his life for the sins of the world.  Another moment of parody is when Victor, Judas' like, quickly falls out of favor or betrays her so to speak by singing a song Edna associates with Robert.  But he is shut down.    In the chapters that follow, we see Leonce saving face by remodeling the house as a way of explaining Edna's odd behavior and moving out of the family home.  Edna feels happy about what she's done.  Of course, these are all feelings but “Every step which she took to relieving herself from obligations added to her strength and expansion as an individual.  She began to look with her own eyes; to see and to apprehend the deeper undercurrents of life.”   Again, Chopin never gets far away from the idea that Edna is trying to understand for herself what is real and she is doing this by stripping down, an image we will see all the way to the end.    And yet, the text never clarifies exactly what it is that Edna is learning about the world and herself.  She draws no conclusions, makes no provisions, takes on no responsibilities.  Reality is an immovable thing.  It is not something we simply escape- that is not possible.      Well, I'm not sure Edna knows that.  She visits her children and weeps when she ssees them. Let me quote here, “She lived with them a whole week long, giving them all of herself, and gathering, and filling. Herself with their young existence.”  She tells then about the Pigeon house and the kids get real very quickly.  They ask her where they would sleep, where papa would sleep. Edna's answer betrays her unwillingness to problem solve.  She says and I quote, “the fairies would fix it all right.”      Edna rejects reality over and over again.  She responds with fantasy at every point.  Madame Ratignolle recognizes this.  In chapter 33 she pays Edna a visit at the pigeon house.  She asks about the dinner party.  She warns her about her behavior with Arobin, but she also makes Edna promise that when the baby comes, Edna would come be a part of the delivery.  Before leaving she says this to Edna, “In some ways you seem to me like a child, Edna. You seem to act without a certain amount of reflection which is necessary in this life.”      Adele is referring to whatever is going on with Arobin, but really, the relationship with Robert is the epitome of her fantasy.  As long as Robert is flirting with no goal- like he did on Grand Isle, Edna is in love with him.  On Grand Isle they share a meal together.  They talk about spirits and pirates.  She loves that.  But here in New Orleans, Robert approaches Edna with a desire to be honest and she rejects that.  The text says that in some way “Robert seemed nearer to her off there in Mexico than when he stood in her presence, and she had touched his hand”.   After Edna's birthday we see no more communal meals, Edna eats alone- there is no more fellowship at this point really with anyone.  Edna invites Robert to eat with her at a little restaurant called “Catiche”.  Edna requests a plate and puts food in front of him, but he doesn't eat a morsel. He walks her home and comes inside.  Edna kisses him.  He confesses his love and how he is tormented because Edna is not free.  Let's read this exchange.    “Something put into my head that you cared for me; and I lost my senses.  I forgot everything but a wild dream of you some way becoming my wife.”    Your wife!    “Religion, loyalty, everything would give way if only you cared.”    Then you must have forgotten that I was Leonce Pontellier's wife.”    “Oh I was demented, dreaming of wild, impossible things, recalling men who had set their wives free, we have heard of such things.”    Yes, we have heard of such things.”    There's a little more back and forth until we get to this line of Edna's, “You have been a very very foolish boy, wasting your time dreaming of impossible things when you speak of Mr. Pontellier setting me free!  I am no longer one of Mr. Pontellier's possessions to dispose of or not.  I give myself where I choose.  If he were to say “here Robert, take her and be happy; she is yours, I should laugh at you both.”    He of course responds with, “What do you mean?”  He has no idea what Edna's talking about.      Exactly, and here is where the a plot complication makes things interesting.  Their conversation is interrupted when Madame Ratignolle's servant comes to say that Adelle is having her baby.  Edna leaves Robert.  She says this to Robert, “I love you.  Only you; no one but you.  It was you who awoke me last summer out of a life-long, stupid dream.”      Robert begs Edna, as if she really were Queen Edna.  He begs her to stay with him- to not go to Adelle.  This is kind reminiscient of the stereotypical female damsel in distress begging her hero to stay- except in revere.  She pulls away, promises to return and leaves him and  quote the text here, “longing to hold her and keep her.”      This Birth scene is symbolic in many ways.  It also is a return to the female reality.  Is there anything more real in this world than bringing life into it?  This birth scene reminds readers that this is a uniquely female story because this is one way men and women engage the world differently and there is no way around it. Motherhood and fatherhood are not the same.  Edna goes to Adelle and begins to feel uneasy. Let's read this paragraph from chapter 37.     Page 127    On the surface, it seems that Adele is hoping to inspire Edna to resume her role as a Woman-mother.  On the surface it seems that Edna is battling social conventions and her own sensuality.      Of course, the whole experience leaves her dazed.  The doctor walks her home, and I quote, “Oh well, I don't know that it matters after all.  One has to think of the children some time or other; the sooner the better.”  Let's read the rest of this dialogue between the doctor and Edna.    Page 128      Even at the end of the chapter, Edna cannot articulate her own thoughts, not even inside her own head.  Still she remembers Adele's voice whispering, “Think of the children; think of them.”  She meant to think of them; that determination had driven into her soul like a death wound- but not tonight.  Tomorrow would be time to think of everything.”    Of course, when she gets inside the pigeon house there is no Robert.  He left a note. “I love you. Good bye- because I love you.”  Edna grew faint; uttered no words and stayed up the entire night, apparently just staring at a flickering lamp.    Again, may I point out- light represents hope and hers is flickering.      Speaking just in a general sense, we are co-creators of our reality- our circumstances proscribe lots of things, but we create out of those circumstances and we know it.  And since we know this, no person can run away from his own innate moral obligation to live up to whatever potential we find inside of us.  Whatever we determine that to be.  We cannot run away from that reality.  No matter how hard we try to put it off until tomorrow, that sense of obligation to create something out of our lives is inside of us.  We can't run from it because it is not coming from outside of us.  Edna, in all of her confusion, and she, is very confused about a lot of things at various points in the book, but she never wavers about that.  She clearly says early on in the book, that she understood herself to have an obligation first and foremost to herself.  But what is that obligation- it is for her what it is for everyone.  She must meet her own potential.  We cannot fail at that.  If we feel we are failing at that, that's when despair sets in.      Edna looks at certain realities in her life and awakens to an awareness she doesn't want to face.  She sees obligations in her future- not opportunities.  She doesn't want tomorrow to come, but not going to bed does not put off the morning from arriving.      The end of the book circles back to where it starts- Grand Isle.  Except it is not the Grand Isle of the summer.  Archetypally, Spring represents new birth, summer represents youth; fall represents adulthood or maturity.  Grand Isle is still there, but the women from the summer resort are not.  It's barren. The sun and the warmth is not there either.  Edna returns to find Victor there.  She arrives to find that he's been telling Mariequita all about her birthday dinner.  He has described Edna and and I quote, “Venus rising from the foam”.  If you remember from your Roman mythology, Venus is the goddess of love and is said to have emerged full-grown from the ocean foam.  So read into that what you will.  Anyway Edna asks him to prepare a meal of fish.  She then leaves Victor for the beach for a swim.  If you recall, it was at this place where she had her first swim and experienced her first real awakening.  But now this beach is dreary and deserted.     Let's listen to the thoughts in Edna's head, “She had said it over and over to herself.  “Today it is Arobin' tomorrow it will be someone else.  It makes no difference to me.  It doesn't matter about Leonce Pontelllier- but Raoul and Etienne!”  She understood now clearly what she had meant long ago when she said to Adele Ratignolle that she would give up the unessential, but she would never sacrifice herself for her children.  Despondency had come upon her there in the wakeful night, and had never lifted. There was no one thing in the world that she desired.  There was no human being whom she wanted near her except Robert; and she even realized that the day would come when he, too, and the thought of him would melt out of her existence, leaving her alone.  The children appeared before her like antagonists who had overcome her, who had overpowered and sought to drag her into the soul's slavery for the rest of her days.  But she knew a way to elude them.  She was not thinking of these things when she walked down to the beach.”    There's a lot of nihilism in those comments.  Edna has found nothing that excites her passion.  “There was no one thing that she desired” – that's the line that stands out.  Desire is the fuel of human behavior.  It's where we see our potential.  This is a huge expression of someone who has given up all desire to have responsibility for anyone or anything- and it is unthinking here.  She is completely detached to a degree that it's actually shocking.  I see why this book unsettled so many people.  We don't want to believe people can detach like this.  We know it's dangerous.     She wades out into this ocean because the seas is seductive.  It whispers, it clamours; it murmurs.  It invites her soul to want in the abysses of solitude.  Edna looks up to see a bird with a broken wing beating the air above and falling down disabled to the water.  She then takes off all of her clothes and stands naked in the open air, at the mercy of the sun with the waves inviting her to come in, and so she does.  Let's read this final page.    Page 133      We notice right away the sea is a serpent about her ankle.  Most of us think of a serpent as a symbol for the devil, and that's true in the book of Genesis.  But that is not the only time we see a serpent in the Bible.  In the book of Exodus, the Israelites in the desert look up to a serpent on a stick for healing.  Archetypally a serpent is a symbol of rebirth.    Edna retreats into thoughts of her childhood which reminds me that Edna has no mother.  Honestly, this does not read like a suicide. I For one, think, Chopin leaves it completely open ended.  Can we be sure Edna even dies?  Chopin ends this book entirely unresolved.  It's disturbing.      It hinges on what you want to do with that ocean.  And scholars have come to zero consensus on how to understand this ending.  Oceans symbolically can be sources of self-awareness.  They can be places to find rebirth.  But, what's jarring about this ending is that there is nothing in Edna's characterization at any point in the book to suggest that Edna wants a beginning or even an ending for that matter.  Edna doesn't search for closure not one time in this story- even the bedtime story she tells her kids there's no ending.  Edna is not just rejecting society's roles for her; she seems to be rejecting herself as an individual here.  Do these final images of her childhood suggest she wants to start over or does she give up up?    When ending a good song, every musician knows you have to create closure at the end or you don't resolve the tension in the music.  Non musicians may not know that but they feel it when it happens. Try ending a song on the 5 chord.  And for a woman with such a keen sense of music, it seems Chopin purposely leaves her song unresolved.  There is no funeral; nobody on the beach; not even any thoughts of exit in Edna's mind.  There is nothing.  Instead, Edna is focused on all the repeating elements of her own life's story.  It is a totally directionless ending.    And that's what people love about it- it's messy and unresolved.  It's realistic but also kind of mythical.   I guess, if we want to we can finish the tale in our own minds.  We can either kill her off or revive her.  She either sinks into further illusion, or she awakens one final time into a creative reality.  The central motif of this book is this sleeping/waking thing that goes on the entire time.  And maybe that's where we find ourselves-- hopefully to a much lesser degree than Edna- the messiness of life sets in when we find ourselves oscillating between waking up and further deluding ourselves at some lost point in our lives.  We will make a mess of things (as Chopin says about Edna) – being a victim of forces without and forces within.  Yet what happens after we go into the ocean- or do we even dare?  I like to see this ending positively.  I like to think of Edna rising up and finding she CAN attach to other humans in a way where one does not consume the other.  She can find meaning in her children, in work, in art, in society.   She can find a way to make peace with her culture, her society, her limitations from without and within.  In my mind's eye, she arises out of the foam-like Venus to rob a term from Victor.  So, whether it's realistic or not- In my mind, Edna comes back up- A woman- Queen.  I know I'm adding extensively to the text and that is a terribly bad no no, but hopefully while she was under water listening to all those bees she came up with a good plan.      HA!  You do like to find the silver lining in every storm.  Well, thanks for spending time with us today.  We hope you enjoyed our final discussion on this very perplexing piece of literature.  Next episode, we move from Louisiana up the road to our home state of Tennessee to discuss the music and life of our own Dolly Parton, self-made woman of this generation, whose displays the very idea of local color in her music.  We would ask you to please share our podcast with a friend.  Email or text them a link.  Share a link on your social media.  That's how we grow.  Also, visit our website at www.howtolovelitpodcast.com for merchandise as well as free listening guides for teachers and students of English.      Peace out.                                     

An encouraging word for those suffering from despondency by Rev. James Slopsema.

Despondency is a feeling of being downcast, disheartened, and hopeless. It leads to spiritual death. But hope in Christ overcomes it.

Despondency is a feeling of being downcast, disheartened, and hopeless. It leads to spiritual death. But hope in Christ overcomes it.