Podcasts about eight steps

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jacqui discusses what to do when someone you know is suicidal. My 21-year-old nephew is an atheist, uses substances to drown his sorrows, and has put his hands on his mother more than once. We lost a sibling to suicide, so that might be why my sister is overprotective. The hosts discuss why betrayed women are reluctant to get help for themselves. How do I love and support my 22-year-old daughter without supporting the lesbian lifestyle? My daughter is in a lesbian relationship, and we are Christians who want to love and support her while staying true to our beliefs. New Life Live — Program Transcript Air Date: September 10 Hosts: Brian Perez, Dr. Alice Benton (Clinical Psychologist), and Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist), with a visit from New Life President Becky Brown Welcome to New Life Live, the premier place to receive free advice from Christian psychologists and counselors for the mental, emotional, relational, and spiritual challenges you face. Since 1988, we’ve offered compassionate responses that combine God’s truth with proven psychological principles to guide you toward healing. Our phone lines are open. Call us now at 1-800-229-3000. Opening: A Conversation About Suicide Awareness Brian Perez: Hey, welcome to New Life Live. Thank you so much for joining us today. My name is Brian Perez. I’m here with clinical psychologist Dr. Alice Benton and licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris. Ladies, it is so good to be here with you today. Jacqui, what’s on your mind to start us off? Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, with it being Suicide Awareness Day, I have been thinking about how important suicide conversations are and how difficult they are. You know, sometimes we notice that somebody’s not themselves and maybe they’re withdrawing or talking about being too much of a burden, saying people would be better off without them. Maybe they’ve started to seem hopeless or wanting to get rid of things, and we start to worry about their safety. But then we become afraid ourselves, and in our fear we don’t ask the question. I’ve found amongst my friends and family and even clients that people are often surprised when I very directly say, “Are you thinking about ending your life? Are you thinking about suicide? Are you thinking about harming yourself? Are you thinking about harming someone else?” And it’s because we don’t want to make people feel bad. So out of our own fear, we don’t do the very thing someone needs. I have heard people say, “Well, I don’t want to cause them to do that,” or “I don’t want to put it on their mind if it’s not already on their mind.” But asking someone directly about suicide doesn’t put the idea in their head. It actually lets them know that you see them, you care about them, that they matter, and that you’re willing to hear what they have to say. And as Christians, sometimes I think we feel pressured to immediately give a scripture, or “I’ll pray for you,” or tell people, “God has a plan.” And yes, those things are true and they can be meaningful, but it’s often not the right answer. Often people just simply need you to be willing to stay. They need to know that they matter enough that even though they are in pain, and their pain hurts you, you will sit with them — that they do matter. So listen. Don’t judge. Don’t minimize their pain — “Oh, it’s fine, we all go through things like that,” or “That happened a long time ago, you should be over that by now.” Don’t try to fix everything in the moment. Sometimes people just need to sit in what hurts, and that is okay. Help them connect to someone who can provide support. Help them connect to New Life. Help them connect to a counselor. Help them find a Life Recovery Group so that they can be around other people who can help them see their own value. Suicide prevention doesn’t always begin with having great words or the perfect words. Sometimes it’s just noticing that someone is struggling and being willing to stay. Dr. Alice Benton: I find that those who are suffering usually want to be asked and wish people would ask them. And you don’t have to be a therapist to ask. It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers. Because if your loved one says, “Yes, I want to hurt myself, I do want to die,” then it can be as simple as calling us at New Life. It can be as simple as calling the suicide prevention hotline, 988. I’ve called 988 in order to get a sense of what happens when someone calls. I found that the person who answered was well equipped, so kind, and very patient. They know what to do. We know what to do. All you have to do, if your loved one says they want to hurt themselves, is reach out for help from professionals, and we’ll walk you through what to do next. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: And I think sharing that also with our kids. I had a conversation with someone whose child came home and said their friend told them that they’d been wanting to hurt themselves, and the kid didn’t know what to do. So we were able to say, “Walk them to the nurse’s office, walk them to the principal’s office, walk them to an adult, and stay with them and have that conversation.” It’s a conversation my family also has from time to time, knowing that the increase in suicidal ideation is so strong today. Our kids need to be equipped. Dr. Alice Benton: They do. They’re out in the world, and people say mean things, and so we need to tell them that their life matters and that they can talk to us about anything. Brian Perez: Yep. We’ll be right back on New Life Live. Gigi, you’ll be our first call, so hang on. Resources Mentioned Brian Perez: Since we were just on the topic of suicide, I want to let you know about a couple of articles that we have available on our website, newlife.com. One of them is called “What to Do When Someone Is Suicidal.” It probably has the information that Jacqui just gave, maybe some extra stuff as well. So check that out at newlife.com. We also have a tip sheet. If you yourself have that suicidal thinking, it’s called “Eight Steps to Breaking Free from Suicidal Thinking.” We can send you that tip sheet when you call 1-800-NEW-LIFE. Or, you know what, just order that tip sheet anyway. Have it handy just in case something happens and you wind up having a conversation with someone. Again, that one’s called “Eight Steps to Breaking Free from Suicidal Thinking.” Call us to get it. And if you’re watching on Facebook or YouTube, we’ll put that information in the show notes there. Caller: Gigi from Orlando, Florida Brian Perez: Let’s go to the phones now. Here is Gigi, who listens to us on newlife.com in Orlando, Florida. Hey there, Gigi. Welcome to New Life Live. Gigi: Thank you. Brian Perez: How can we help you today? Gigi: This topic is kind of multifaceted, but it comes down to things like boundaries. I’m an aunt watching my sister deal with my nephew and the havoc that he’s wreaking on my sister’s marriage, and it’s just hard to watch. He’s 21. We’re a Christian family. He was brought up to know the Lord, and he’s saying that he’s an atheist. And he’s so bitter against all of us, his parents. He’s using substances to drown his sorrows. And it could be worse — I don’t want it to be worse — but he’s had trouble controlling his emotions and anger and has put his hands on his mother more than once, but not recently. And she still is in denial. She’ll tell me one thing and then deny it the next, because it’s hard. She doesn’t want the family to be prejudiced against him. But it’s too late now. We don’t feel safe. And it’s just hard. Dr. Alice Benton: Can I pause you for a minute? She doesn’t want the family to be prejudiced against him — so she doesn’t want the family to react negatively to his behavior and kind of not want him around. Is that what you’re saying? Gigi: Yes, that’s correct. Dr. Alice Benton: And he doesn’t want to be around you guys either, right? Gigi: Yeah, he’s decided he’s atheist, and so, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: You said he put hands on his mother more than once. Were there any consequences for that? Gigi: Yes. The police came. He had to be bailed out of jail. They hired an attorney. It could have been worse. It was him struggling against the police that actually got him in trouble, and the fact that she had called because she was scared. So she blames herself for that, because he won’t let that go. He’s 21. This has happened over the course of a few years that he’s just drowned in sorrow and blaming. Dr. Alice Benton: And Gigi, he still lives with her. Is that right? Gigi: Yes. Dr. Alice Benton: And you said her husband — is her husband his father? Gigi: Oh yes, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: So is he that way with his father as well? Gigi: His father loves him, but he doesn’t have his son’s respect, and his son doesn’t trust his dad — and I think it’s both ways. I think my sister is his soul. She’s the person he’s latched onto for life. And with torture or love, he does something bad and then apologizes. Dr. Alice Benton: Gigi, you’re so right to be worried about her, because she loves him, but she’s also trying to protect him from the righteous consequences of his behavior, and it’s just a setup for him to repeat it. Tell us, do you know if he experienced a major loss or trauma that might have led to him being so embittered? Gigi: My sister would say that it is because they took him across country when he was in high school, because of a job for his dad. And while they were there, he was sad and lonely — first time in high school. A young lady broke his heart and said many awful things, and he has low self-image issues. But he’ll drag everything up. It’s amazing the memory we have when we are wanting to be bitter and resentful. He blame-shifts a lot onto them. Dr. Alice Benton: Blame-shifting is very — Gigi: Yes, I didn’t know that phrase. Dr. Alice Benton: And it’s understandable that he’s hurt by these things, but of course none of it justifies his substance use and his aggressive behavior towards his mom. And she is not willing to allow the consequences for him. But she does want you to be a listening ear, which puts you in a tough position, because you probably want to intervene and she won’t allow you to. Is that right? Gigi: Yes. It’s amazing how quickly our brains go from one thing to another. I will be wanting to encourage her, and then I have to stand up for logic, and then we pray together, and it’s so emotional all the time. I have other siblings, and they don’t want to hear it anymore, and it makes her feel so bad. And she can’t help but want to call us bad names. Dr. Alice Benton: Oh, she’s calling you all bad names. Gigi: Oh yes, yes, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: So she’s verbally abusive to you, even though you’re her listener? Gigi: Yes, because we are not living up to her needs and expectations. So the son might have gotten it honestly. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, I — Gigi: Yes, but I know my whole sister. You know what I mean? I know — Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: You know what you see when you’re with her? I’m going to stop you there, because we have a tendency to say we know, but oftentimes we are in relationship with people in our imaginations, not the reality of how they live their life every day, because we’re not there. So we think we know — “My sister would do this,” or “My sister’s this way or that way.” But look at her life and the life circumstance that she’s in. The sister you were about to describe, that you know, wouldn’t be living in this life circumstance. So she has a part of her that isn’t the her you guys know. It is also maybe not the parent you’ve always seen. Dr. Alice Benton: Dr. Jacqui was asking about any events that maybe had happened in his life. That move happened when he was in high school. He maybe felt like he had no say in it. They moved him. He lost friends. Loneliness. She is his person. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: “You’ve got your family. That’s enough. That’s all you need, right?” Well, if she is his person, I wonder what things had been like before he turned 21. What was it like when he was five? What were the responses when he was seven? What were the responses when he was 12? What happened when he got an F? What happened when he lost the game? Because if she’s willing to mistreat you all like that, it is so likely she responds to him in reactivity and anger, too. Dr. Alice Benton: And they’re back and forth in their reactivity, and then he’s now a man and he’s getting bigger, and so it’s starting to look different. And the family doesn’t enjoy being around him. Have you guys — when he was younger — did you enjoy being together as a family with your sister and her husband and your nephew? Gigi: Well, my sister saved him. He was always bailed out. He had two older sisters, so he was always saying, “I’ll have what she’s having,” and “Oh, she’s going to help me with my homework,” things like that. He was given a lot of leniency because he was the baby. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: The baby. Gigi: Yeah. If he just said “Mama” enough, he was going to get his way — or get a spanking. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: So would the spanking be from Mom? Gigi: Oh yeah. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: So he had a situation that might have been a little bit disorganized, and so he couldn’t tell if he’s going to get the wrath of Mom or the coddling of Mom. Gigi: That is true. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: What was childhood like for you and your sister? Gigi: Well, I just want to touch on something else. My sister was a great mother. I know exactly what she was going through. I saw it up front. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: No judgment. We all do the best we can with what we have. But what did you guys come out of? What did you see? How were you parented? Gigi: We had parents that were Christian. We all could have been better. But I can tell you, we had a sorrowful loss in 2007. My sister — she committed suicide. There’s too much to even go into, but the point is she was an angel. She loved Jesus, and she had some mental illness that — well, we failed her in fellowship, too. I feel like we did. My sister does not want another angel. Do you know what I mean? Dr. Alice Benton: Of course. So she might overprotect her son because she doesn’t want him to commit suicide. That completely makes sense. That is it. Dr. Alice Benton: So, Gigi, I think there are two things that you have in your power to do, because so much of this is outside of your ability to really control. You might consider a family intervention, because your nephew is the obvious problem, but you’re pointing out there is brokenness in the family — and there is in all of our families. A family interventionist, and we have a couple of great people that we can recommend, would be able to help decipher who most needs the intervention. The nephew looks like the obvious one, but he may not be the only one. An intervention brings to bear truth about how the chaotic behavior is affecting the family — that’s the way your sister abuses you, but it’s also the way the nephew abuses your sister. And it offers options for healing, but their response to that is out of your control, as you well know. And so if your sister continues to be abusive to you, you may have to start protecting yourself by limiting your exposure to her. She’s getting all this free therapy from you. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Oh, I wouldn’t call it therapy. Dr. Alice Benton: Well, you’re her good listening ear. But because you’re her main listener, I think she doesn’t know she needs more help, or she’s not willing or able to go get more professional help. And you need some of that responsibility taken off of your shoulders and transferred to a professional. I have the feeling your sister’s not real willing to get help. Gigi: Well, the good news on that end — all these months that I have been harping on “You need somebody to talk to, you need somebody to tell you how to talk it over with” — she’s got a therapist. Dr. Alice Benton: Terrific. God is good. So celebrating that is right to do. But you still can limit your exposure to her. So that may be, “I’ve got five minutes to listen to you. If you get mean, if you get loud, I will hang up.” Gigi: Oh wow. Dr. Alice Benton: Or, “I’m not willing to hear about this anymore. Please take this to your therapist.” Gigi, you said “Oh wow” twice. What has come up for you? Gigi: That just breaks my heart. Wow. Dr. Alice Benton: You want to find a way to fix it without her having to suffer the consequences. In the same way, she wants to find a way to fix it for her son without him having to face the consequences. She’s not going to grow without the consequence. If you continue to subject yourself to her behavior, you are doing exactly what she is doing with her son. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: How does that land, Gigi? Gigi: She’s been there for all of us every time we needed her. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Would she tell you wonderful things about her son? It’s the same cycle. Dr. Alice Benton: And Gigi, oddly enough, removing yourself to some distance — it loves her better than just being her listener, because it will force more discomfort, which makes it more likely that she’ll receive the help she’s getting from her therapist. Brian Perez: Gigi, thanks for calling us today here on New Life Live. We know we offered you a lot of suggestions, and go back and listen to the archive so that you can find out more. New Life President Becky Brown Joins the Program Brian Perez: We are back on New Life. Brian Perez here, along with doctors Jacqui Mack-Harris and Alice Benton. And look who’s joining us — it’s New Life President Becky Brown. Hey, Becky. Becky Brown: Hello. Surprise. My heart is hurting for Gigi and her family. So many times we hear the efforts that people are putting into trying to fix the problem. And I’m so grateful that we are here for her to reach out and talk to both you, Jacqui, and Alice, with that compassionate care and insightful truth that you gave her. And you gave her next steps. The only way we can do that is because people are generous and support New Life. They’ve been either part of our 99 for the One monthly donation, or they give big gifts, because out of the abundance that God has given them, they want to give back to make sure that the hope of a new life is there. I was thinking about “Every Man’s Battle,” and we hear so many testimonies. One in particular: Nick felt dead inside. Pornography, lust, and affairs gave him temporary relief, but the emptiness always returned. And while he tried different programs, he was stuck and began to lose hope. His wife gave him an ultimatum — and we hear that a lot here. She said, “You need to go to Every Man’s Battle.” He was hesitant, but he went, and he discovered what was fueling the addiction. He had a safe, shame-free zone and godly counselors who have been on this journey. They know what it’s like to be stuck and to find that freedom in Christ. New Life has had the privilege to walk alongside so many people for close to 40 years. And we couldn’t do it unless God was moving in the hearts of you, our donors and our listeners, to be part of what God is doing through New Life. So I just wanted to come on today and encourage you: if you have not supported us yet, today’s the day. And Brian, how can they give? Brian Perez: Oh, there’s several ways, Becky. They can go online to newlife.com. They can call us at 1-800-NEW-LIFE. They can text NLM — as in New Life Ministries — to 28950. And yeah, if you want to make a big gift today, we are not going to say, “No, no, no, let’s break it up into two or three gifts.” No, no — we’ll take it, because we appreciate so much what you guys do, what the Lord lays on your heart to give toward New Life so that we can continue what we’re doing. And sometimes it’s people like our last caller, Becky, who are calling on behalf of someone else, because they see the turmoil that their family is going through, or a friend or a neighbor. They call because they’re like, “You know what, I trust you guys, you can help. Give me some tips to help my friend. Give me a tip sheet that I can give my friend, because there’s so much going on.” And there’s not too many places — I can’t even think of one — where somebody on a live program would pick up a phone call. We don’t know what you’re going to ask. We don’t know what the situation is. And we are ready to give you the next step, because we know that God is working through the ministry and through our incredible co-hosts. Becky Brown: We’ve been doing this a long time. We’ve been helping so many people, and you’re probably one of them, listener. You’ve been impacted. And so today’s the day. Thanks for letting me jump on, and let’s go back to the calls. Brian Perez: Anytime, Becky. Anytime. It’s so good to hear from Becky when she tells us these stories of listeners that she’s heard firsthand of how New Life Ministries has helped. And I remember recently, Alice, you were talking about how there were things you were going through — you didn’t even know New Life was around, and then you found New Life, and boom. Dr. Alice Benton: That’s right. Even though I grew up in the faith, and I went to college for psychology, I really hadn’t found a resource that combined those two things together. And that’s what New Life does very uniquely. It shows us how the two go hand in hand and are both necessary for our healing. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: I love that New Life exists, because I came up in a church where psychology was bad, and so the church would tell you not to see a therapist — all you need is the Bible, and your pastor. If your pastor doesn’t say it, then you shouldn’t hear it. And so it was a joy for me to find New Life and to find these professionals who have this wisdom, who are God-led, who come prayed up and ready to see what the Holy Spirit will use them to do. Over the years I’ve been able to have conversations with and meet so many people who love New Life, who call in and who listen regularly. It’s a gift to our community, and we really appreciate that people continue to give so that we can continue to serve. Dr. Alice Benton: And it’s not just about listening and receiving the wisdom, but about putting it into practice, especially with the New Life family that believes in these principles together, knows they’re broken, and wants to heal and is actively taking those steps. Because wisdom alone, information alone, is not enough. It needs to be practiced with other people. That’s that iron that sharpens iron. And I’ve never found better iron than at New Life. Brian Perez: Those formative years for me too were also, you know, no psychology — just whatever your pastor says, that’s all you need. Psychology was just man’s wisdom instead of God’s wisdom. Well, here at New Life, we combine these things, and we put God’s word first in front of everything that we do, because that’s what it’s all about. We’re not here to just tell you what we think — we search the scriptures and we give you godly advice, and we want to keep doing it. So if you can help us today, go to newlife.com, or call 1-800-NEW-LIFE, or text NLM to 28950. Thank you for your generosity. Email Question: Debbie Brian Perez: So we have several ways that you can ask your question. Our favorite way is when you call into the studio when we’re here taking calls, and you can find out more about that on our website, newlife.com/radio, which shows our recording schedule. It also gives you a phone number where you can leave a voicemail. And there’s also a form that you can fill out so that you can send us an email with your question. That is what Debbie did. Debbie asks, “How do I love and support my 22-year-old daughter without giving support to the lesbian lifestyle?” Debbie says her daughter is in a lesbian relationship. She’s never exhibited this tendency before. She’s not had any boyfriends, but she’s wanted one desperately. They’re Christian; she’s been raised in the church. She thinks God is okay with her lifestyle. “So how do I love and support her?” What do you guys say to Debbie? Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: I say love her and support her as the person. That’s hard, though, I think, for Debbie to be able to do, because Debbie’s not able to separate out her daughter’s relational activity from the person that she is. What I would wonder is: what has your relationship with her been like? What does love look like? What does it mean to love someone? I would go to scripture and look at what scripture says about love, and see if those are thoughts, tenets, behaviors, ways of being that you find in your relationship with your daughter. And then this is something I ask people regularly: how is that other person’s sex life affecting you? I think as Christians, we spend an enormous amount of time concerned about other people’s sexual health and sex life, and I just don’t see God being nearly as concerned about everybody else’s sex life as we are. I think we as Christians have made that a focal point, and we are doing a disservice. We are not introducing people to Jesus. We’re introducing people to rules and propriety, and Jesus came to set us free. Either we are free in Christ or we are not. And if I help someone know Jesus — I’ve introduced them to Jesus, I’ve walked through the Roman Road with them, they’ve accepted Christ and they know Jesus — the rest is not my business. I trust the Holy Spirit to do what he’s going to do. And if they end up in a homosexual relationship, drug-addicted, in a violent abusive relationship, anything — that is between them and God at that point. All God has called me to do is love God with all my heart, soul, and mind, and to love others as I love myself. So I think as Christians, we have to check ourselves. We are the ones falling out of line. I don’t have anything to do with your marriage — whether you are in a same-sex marriage or a gendered marriage, I have nothing to do with that. What God has called me to do is to help you know Jesus. And if I’ve done that, then I know I’ve done my work, and I trust the Holy Spirit to handle anything that God’s not pleased with. Dr. Alice Benton: Debbie, your question must have a lot of fear and pain to it, and I know I would feel similarly if I were in your shoes. We’re getting this question more and more frequently from other parents who wonder, “Why did my good Christian upbringing not seem to stick in this area of my child’s life?” — especially when your daughter sounds like she expressed a desire for a boyfriend for a long time. What a shock that she then introduces you to her girlfriend. I think you will not like some of the things that I have to say, because getting to know her partner is a way to love her and to love the partner. But I think that might not feel right to you to do. I think you can be a Christian influence in both of their lives more by your actions than by your words of opposition. There could be a tendency towards judgmentalism out of your fear — and I would have that same tendency in your shoes. And you might possibly be wondering, “Did I fail my daughter? What did I do wrong that this is a choice she has made?” So I want you to be really careful about judgmentalism coming out. I also think we are called to warn other believers when we see that there is sin behavior, or to warn those who are stumbling toward the edge. So I think it’s a parental obligation to say — once, with a whole lot of love and kindness and humility — “I am an imperfect parent, and I also need to point something out, because I love you so much. I am confused that you’re both a Christian and you’re choosing a homosexual relationship. What’s your understanding of what the Bible has to say about that? I really want to understand your perspective as a Christian.” Be more of a listener, Debbie, than a speaker. But once, it’s important to conclude with, “I disagree with you. I think this part of your relationship is out of alignment with God’s will, and I need to point that out because I love you and I don’t want you to have unnecessary suffering in your life. All the times I’ve been out of alignment with God’s will — my lying, my extramarital emotional affair, my excessive alcohol use — I was out of alignment with his will, and it brought suffering on me too. So I’m going to keep loving you, I’m going to keep praying for you, and I thank you that you heard this conversation from me.” That’s what I would have you share with your daughter. There’s a great book called Embodied by Preston Sprinkle. He’s a clinician who has specialized in this very thing: What do we do with both Christianity and same-sex desire, and how do we love well? And we do it a lot more with behavior than with words. Brian Perez: Isn’t loving and supporting the partner — Debbie was asking about her daughter, and you both gave great advice, but when we bring the partner into it, doesn’t it seem like we’re condoning the behavior? We’ve got the holidays coming up. People are going to probably start calling soon: “Do I invite them to Thanksgiving dinner? Do I invite them to our Christmas celebration?” Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, I think, like Alice said, this is an opportunity for your witness. And it honestly doesn’t matter if you agree with the lifestyle or not. You’ve said you don’t agree — so in that, you have said, “This isn’t something I think is okay. I love you, but I’m concerned for you. I’m concerned for how this will impact your life.” That is your “I don’t agree.” But we are called to love others. We’re called to love our enemies. We’re called to love our neighbors. We’re called to love ourselves. We’re called to love God. We are not called to not love anybody. Period. And we are not doing a great job of that as Christians. So I agree that is one way to show your daughter love and acceptance of her as a person. You don’t have to accept someone’s experience or their life in order to validate them as a person. And so when her friend comes over, you have boundaries in place regardless of whether your child is dating someone you approve of or not, right? Hopefully they respect your home and they respect your rules. But you get to set boundaries. And you’re right, the holidays are coming up, and this definitely is going to be a topic at many tables, because some families are estranged, because it is preferable to not have the other person around than to have that discomfort of, “Well, we disagree with this lifestyle.” But I agree with Dr. Alice. I think it can be a way that your Christian witness can go forward. We have people in our life who don’t believe how we believe, and whose actions and behaviors are not the same as our own, but they know us and love us, and we know them and we love them. Dr. Alice Benton: If I had no sinners at my table, I wouldn’t be allowed there either. And Jesus gave a pretty neat example of going to the parties that were full of sinners, because the sinners are the ones that need him. I’m the one that needs him. Brian Perez: Yep. Debbie, thanks for submitting your question at newlife.com/radio. We’ll talk to you next time. Thanks for listening. We hope this program has helped you by giving you insights for handling the challenges you face in your life. We want you to know that we’re here for you, but you also need to know that New Life Live is a listener-supported ministry. To make your donation or to get any of the resources mentioned on today’s program, call 1-800-NEW-LIFE. That’s 1-800-639-5433, or online at newlife.com. Please join us again tomorrow for New Life Live. If you or someone you know is struggling If you or someone you love is thinking about suicide or self-harm, you don’t have to face it alone. Call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, or reach out to New Life at 1-800-NEW-LIFE (1-800-639-5433).

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jacqui discusses what to do when someone you know is suicidal. My 21-year-old nephew is an atheist, uses substances to drown his sorrows, and has put his hands on his mother more than once. We lost a sibling to suicide, so that might be why my sister is overprotective. The hosts discuss why betrayed women are reluctant to get help for themselves. How do I love and support my 22-year-old daughter without supporting the lesbian lifestyle? My daughter is in a lesbian relationship, and we are Christians who want to love and support her while staying true to our beliefs. New Life Live — Program Transcript Air Date: September 10 Hosts: Brian Perez, Dr. Alice Benton (Clinical Psychologist), and Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist), with a visit from New Life President Becky Brown Welcome to New Life Live, the premier place to receive free advice from Christian psychologists and counselors for the mental, emotional, relational, and spiritual challenges you face. Since 1988, we’ve offered compassionate responses that combine God’s truth with proven psychological principles to guide you toward healing. Our phone lines are open. Call us now at 1-800-229-3000. Opening: A Conversation About Suicide Awareness Brian Perez: Hey, welcome to New Life Live. Thank you so much for joining us today. My name is Brian Perez. I’m here with clinical psychologist Dr. Alice Benton and licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris. Ladies, it is so good to be here with you today. Jacqui, what’s on your mind to start us off? Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, with it being Suicide Awareness Day, I have been thinking about how important suicide conversations are and how difficult they are. You know, sometimes we notice that somebody’s not themselves and maybe they’re withdrawing or talking about being too much of a burden, saying people would be better off without them. Maybe they’ve started to seem hopeless or wanting to get rid of things, and we start to worry about their safety. But then we become afraid ourselves, and in our fear we don’t ask the question. I’ve found amongst my friends and family and even clients that people are often surprised when I very directly say, “Are you thinking about ending your life? Are you thinking about suicide? Are you thinking about harming yourself? Are you thinking about harming someone else?” And it’s because we don’t want to make people feel bad. So out of our own fear, we don’t do the very thing someone needs. I have heard people say, “Well, I don’t want to cause them to do that,” or “I don’t want to put it on their mind if it’s not already on their mind.” But asking someone directly about suicide doesn’t put the idea in their head. It actually lets them know that you see them, you care about them, that they matter, and that you’re willing to hear what they have to say. And as Christians, sometimes I think we feel pressured to immediately give a scripture, or “I’ll pray for you,” or tell people, “God has a plan.” And yes, those things are true and they can be meaningful, but it’s often not the right answer. Often people just simply need you to be willing to stay. They need to know that they matter enough that even though they are in pain, and their pain hurts you, you will sit with them — that they do matter. So listen. Don’t judge. Don’t minimize their pain — “Oh, it’s fine, we all go through things like that,” or “That happened a long time ago, you should be over that by now.” Don’t try to fix everything in the moment. Sometimes people just need to sit in what hurts, and that is okay. Help them connect to someone who can provide support. Help them connect to New Life. Help them connect to a counselor. Help them find a Life Recovery Group so that they can be around other people who can help them see their own value. Suicide prevention doesn’t always begin with having great words or the perfect words. Sometimes it’s just noticing that someone is struggling and being willing to stay. Dr. Alice Benton: I find that those who are suffering usually want to be asked and wish people would ask them. And you don’t have to be a therapist to ask. It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers. Because if your loved one says, “Yes, I want to hurt myself, I do want to die,” then it can be as simple as calling us at New Life. It can be as simple as calling the suicide prevention hotline, 988. I’ve called 988 in order to get a sense of what happens when someone calls. I found that the person who answered was well equipped, so kind, and very patient. They know what to do. We know what to do. All you have to do, if your loved one says they want to hurt themselves, is reach out for help from professionals, and we’ll walk you through what to do next. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: And I think sharing that also with our kids. I had a conversation with someone whose child came home and said their friend told them that they’d been wanting to hurt themselves, and the kid didn’t know what to do. So we were able to say, “Walk them to the nurse’s office, walk them to the principal’s office, walk them to an adult, and stay with them and have that conversation.” It’s a conversation my family also has from time to time, knowing that the increase in suicidal ideation is so strong today. Our kids need to be equipped. Dr. Alice Benton: They do. They’re out in the world, and people say mean things, and so we need to tell them that their life matters and that they can talk to us about anything. Brian Perez: Yep. We’ll be right back on New Life Live. Gigi, you’ll be our first call, so hang on. Resources Mentioned Brian Perez: Since we were just on the topic of suicide, I want to let you know about a couple of articles that we have available on our website, newlife.com. One of them is called “What to Do When Someone Is Suicidal.” It probably has the information that Jacqui just gave, maybe some extra stuff as well. So check that out at newlife.com. We also have a tip sheet. If you yourself have that suicidal thinking, it’s called “Eight Steps to Breaking Free from Suicidal Thinking.” We can send you that tip sheet when you call 1-800-NEW-LIFE. Or, you know what, just order that tip sheet anyway. Have it handy just in case something happens and you wind up having a conversation with someone. Again, that one’s called “Eight Steps to Breaking Free from Suicidal Thinking.” Call us to get it. And if you’re watching on Facebook or YouTube, we’ll put that information in the show notes there. Caller: Gigi from Orlando, Florida Brian Perez: Let’s go to the phones now. Here is Gigi, who listens to us on newlife.com in Orlando, Florida. Hey there, Gigi. Welcome to New Life Live. Gigi: Thank you. Brian Perez: How can we help you today? Gigi: This topic is kind of multifaceted, but it comes down to things like boundaries. I’m an aunt watching my sister deal with my nephew and the havoc that he’s wreaking on my sister’s marriage, and it’s just hard to watch. He’s 21. We’re a Christian family. He was brought up to know the Lord, and he’s saying that he’s an atheist. And he’s so bitter against all of us, his parents. He’s using substances to drown his sorrows. And it could be worse — I don’t want it to be worse — but he’s had trouble controlling his emotions and anger and has put his hands on his mother more than once, but not recently. And she still is in denial. She’ll tell me one thing and then deny it the next, because it’s hard. She doesn’t want the family to be prejudiced against him. But it’s too late now. We don’t feel safe. And it’s just hard. Dr. Alice Benton: Can I pause you for a minute? She doesn’t want the family to be prejudiced against him — so she doesn’t want the family to react negatively to his behavior and kind of not want him around. Is that what you’re saying? Gigi: Yes, that’s correct. Dr. Alice Benton: And he doesn’t want to be around you guys either, right? Gigi: Yeah, he’s decided he’s atheist, and so, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: You said he put hands on his mother more than once. Were there any consequences for that? Gigi: Yes. The police came. He had to be bailed out of jail. They hired an attorney. It could have been worse. It was him struggling against the police that actually got him in trouble, and the fact that she had called because she was scared. So she blames herself for that, because he won’t let that go. He’s 21. This has happened over the course of a few years that he’s just drowned in sorrow and blaming. Dr. Alice Benton: And Gigi, he still lives with her. Is that right? Gigi: Yes. Dr. Alice Benton: And you said her husband — is her husband his father? Gigi: Oh yes, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: So is he that way with his father as well? Gigi: His father loves him, but he doesn’t have his son’s respect, and his son doesn’t trust his dad — and I think it’s both ways. I think my sister is his soul. She’s the person he’s latched onto for life. And with torture or love, he does something bad and then apologizes. Dr. Alice Benton: Gigi, you’re so right to be worried about her, because she loves him, but she’s also trying to protect him from the righteous consequences of his behavior, and it’s just a setup for him to repeat it. Tell us, do you know if he experienced a major loss or trauma that might have led to him being so embittered? Gigi: My sister would say that it is because they took him across country when he was in high school, because of a job for his dad. And while they were there, he was sad and lonely — first time in high school. A young lady broke his heart and said many awful things, and he has low self-image issues. But he’ll drag everything up. It’s amazing the memory we have when we are wanting to be bitter and resentful. He blame-shifts a lot onto them. Dr. Alice Benton: Blame-shifting is very — Gigi: Yes, I didn’t know that phrase. Dr. Alice Benton: And it’s understandable that he’s hurt by these things, but of course none of it justifies his substance use and his aggressive behavior towards his mom. And she is not willing to allow the consequences for him. But she does want you to be a listening ear, which puts you in a tough position, because you probably want to intervene and she won’t allow you to. Is that right? Gigi: Yes. It’s amazing how quickly our brains go from one thing to another. I will be wanting to encourage her, and then I have to stand up for logic, and then we pray together, and it’s so emotional all the time. I have other siblings, and they don’t want to hear it anymore, and it makes her feel so bad. And she can’t help but want to call us bad names. Dr. Alice Benton: Oh, she’s calling you all bad names. Gigi: Oh yes, yes, yes. Dr. Alice Benton: So she’s verbally abusive to you, even though you’re her listener? Gigi: Yes, because we are not living up to her needs and expectations. So the son might have gotten it honestly. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, I — Gigi: Yes, but I know my whole sister. You know what I mean? I know — Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: You know what you see when you’re with her? I’m going to stop you there, because we have a tendency to say we know, but oftentimes we are in relationship with people in our imaginations, not the reality of how they live their life every day, because we’re not there. So we think we know — “My sister would do this,” or “My sister’s this way or that way.” But look at her life and the life circumstance that she’s in. The sister you were about to describe, that you know, wouldn’t be living in this life circumstance. So she has a part of her that isn’t the her you guys know. It is also maybe not the parent you’ve always seen. Dr. Alice Benton: Dr. Jacqui was asking about any events that maybe had happened in his life. That move happened when he was in high school. He maybe felt like he had no say in it. They moved him. He lost friends. Loneliness. She is his person. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: “You’ve got your family. That’s enough. That’s all you need, right?” Well, if she is his person, I wonder what things had been like before he turned 21. What was it like when he was five? What were the responses when he was seven? What were the responses when he was 12? What happened when he got an F? What happened when he lost the game? Because if she’s willing to mistreat you all like that, it is so likely she responds to him in reactivity and anger, too. Dr. Alice Benton: And they’re back and forth in their reactivity, and then he’s now a man and he’s getting bigger, and so it’s starting to look different. And the family doesn’t enjoy being around him. Have you guys — when he was younger — did you enjoy being together as a family with your sister and her husband and your nephew? Gigi: Well, my sister saved him. He was always bailed out. He had two older sisters, so he was always saying, “I’ll have what she’s having,” and “Oh, she’s going to help me with my homework,” things like that. He was given a lot of leniency because he was the baby. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: The baby. Gigi: Yeah. If he just said “Mama” enough, he was going to get his way — or get a spanking. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: So would the spanking be from Mom? Gigi: Oh yeah. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: So he had a situation that might have been a little bit disorganized, and so he couldn’t tell if he’s going to get the wrath of Mom or the coddling of Mom. Gigi: That is true. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: What was childhood like for you and your sister? Gigi: Well, I just want to touch on something else. My sister was a great mother. I know exactly what she was going through. I saw it up front. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: No judgment. We all do the best we can with what we have. But what did you guys come out of? What did you see? How were you parented? Gigi: We had parents that were Christian. We all could have been better. But I can tell you, we had a sorrowful loss in 2007. My sister — she committed suicide. There’s too much to even go into, but the point is she was an angel. She loved Jesus, and she had some mental illness that — well, we failed her in fellowship, too. I feel like we did. My sister does not want another angel. Do you know what I mean? Dr. Alice Benton: Of course. So she might overprotect her son because she doesn’t want him to commit suicide. That completely makes sense. That is it. Dr. Alice Benton: So, Gigi, I think there are two things that you have in your power to do, because so much of this is outside of your ability to really control. You might consider a family intervention, because your nephew is the obvious problem, but you’re pointing out there is brokenness in the family — and there is in all of our families. A family interventionist, and we have a couple of great people that we can recommend, would be able to help decipher who most needs the intervention. The nephew looks like the obvious one, but he may not be the only one. An intervention brings to bear truth about how the chaotic behavior is affecting the family — that’s the way your sister abuses you, but it’s also the way the nephew abuses your sister. And it offers options for healing, but their response to that is out of your control, as you well know. And so if your sister continues to be abusive to you, you may have to start protecting yourself by limiting your exposure to her. She’s getting all this free therapy from you. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Oh, I wouldn’t call it therapy. Dr. Alice Benton: Well, you’re her good listening ear. But because you’re her main listener, I think she doesn’t know she needs more help, or she’s not willing or able to go get more professional help. And you need some of that responsibility taken off of your shoulders and transferred to a professional. I have the feeling your sister’s not real willing to get help. Gigi: Well, the good news on that end — all these months that I have been harping on “You need somebody to talk to, you need somebody to tell you how to talk it over with” — she’s got a therapist. Dr. Alice Benton: Terrific. God is good. So celebrating that is right to do. But you still can limit your exposure to her. So that may be, “I’ve got five minutes to listen to you. If you get mean, if you get loud, I will hang up.” Gigi: Oh wow. Dr. Alice Benton: Or, “I’m not willing to hear about this anymore. Please take this to your therapist.” Gigi, you said “Oh wow” twice. What has come up for you? Gigi: That just breaks my heart. Wow. Dr. Alice Benton: You want to find a way to fix it without her having to suffer the consequences. In the same way, she wants to find a way to fix it for her son without him having to face the consequences. She’s not going to grow without the consequence. If you continue to subject yourself to her behavior, you are doing exactly what she is doing with her son. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: How does that land, Gigi? Gigi: She’s been there for all of us every time we needed her. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Would she tell you wonderful things about her son? It’s the same cycle. Dr. Alice Benton: And Gigi, oddly enough, removing yourself to some distance — it loves her better than just being her listener, because it will force more discomfort, which makes it more likely that she’ll receive the help she’s getting from her therapist. Brian Perez: Gigi, thanks for calling us today here on New Life Live. We know we offered you a lot of suggestions, and go back and listen to the archive so that you can find out more. New Life President Becky Brown Joins the Program Brian Perez: We are back on New Life. Brian Perez here, along with doctors Jacqui Mack-Harris and Alice Benton. And look who’s joining us — it’s New Life President Becky Brown. Hey, Becky. Becky Brown: Hello. Surprise. My heart is hurting for Gigi and her family. So many times we hear the efforts that people are putting into trying to fix the problem. And I’m so grateful that we are here for her to reach out and talk to both you, Jacqui, and Alice, with that compassionate care and insightful truth that you gave her. And you gave her next steps. The only way we can do that is because people are generous and support New Life. They’ve been either part of our 99 for the One monthly donation, or they give big gifts, because out of the abundance that God has given them, they want to give back to make sure that the hope of a new life is there. I was thinking about “Every Man’s Battle,” and we hear so many testimonies. One in particular: Nick felt dead inside. Pornography, lust, and affairs gave him temporary relief, but the emptiness always returned. And while he tried different programs, he was stuck and began to lose hope. His wife gave him an ultimatum — and we hear that a lot here. She said, “You need to go to Every Man’s Battle.” He was hesitant, but he went, and he discovered what was fueling the addiction. He had a safe, shame-free zone and godly counselors who have been on this journey. They know what it’s like to be stuck and to find that freedom in Christ. New Life has had the privilege to walk alongside so many people for close to 40 years. And we couldn’t do it unless God was moving in the hearts of you, our donors and our listeners, to be part of what God is doing through New Life. So I just wanted to come on today and encourage you: if you have not supported us yet, today’s the day. And Brian, how can they give? Brian Perez: Oh, there’s several ways, Becky. They can go online to newlife.com. They can call us at 1-800-NEW-LIFE. They can text NLM — as in New Life Ministries — to 28950. And yeah, if you want to make a big gift today, we are not going to say, “No, no, no, let’s break it up into two or three gifts.” No, no — we’ll take it, because we appreciate so much what you guys do, what the Lord lays on your heart to give toward New Life so that we can continue what we’re doing. And sometimes it’s people like our last caller, Becky, who are calling on behalf of someone else, because they see the turmoil that their family is going through, or a friend or a neighbor. They call because they’re like, “You know what, I trust you guys, you can help. Give me some tips to help my friend. Give me a tip sheet that I can give my friend, because there’s so much going on.” And there’s not too many places — I can’t even think of one — where somebody on a live program would pick up a phone call. We don’t know what you’re going to ask. We don’t know what the situation is. And we are ready to give you the next step, because we know that God is working through the ministry and through our incredible co-hosts. Becky Brown: We’ve been doing this a long time. We’ve been helping so many people, and you’re probably one of them, listener. You’ve been impacted. And so today’s the day. Thanks for letting me jump on, and let’s go back to the calls. Brian Perez: Anytime, Becky. Anytime. It’s so good to hear from Becky when she tells us these stories of listeners that she’s heard firsthand of how New Life Ministries has helped. And I remember recently, Alice, you were talking about how there were things you were going through — you didn’t even know New Life was around, and then you found New Life, and boom. Dr. Alice Benton: That’s right. Even though I grew up in the faith, and I went to college for psychology, I really hadn’t found a resource that combined those two things together. And that’s what New Life does very uniquely. It shows us how the two go hand in hand and are both necessary for our healing. Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: I love that New Life exists, because I came up in a church where psychology was bad, and so the church would tell you not to see a therapist — all you need is the Bible, and your pastor. If your pastor doesn’t say it, then you shouldn’t hear it. And so it was a joy for me to find New Life and to find these professionals who have this wisdom, who are God-led, who come prayed up and ready to see what the Holy Spirit will use them to do. Over the years I’ve been able to have conversations with and meet so many people who love New Life, who call in and who listen regularly. It’s a gift to our community, and we really appreciate that people continue to give so that we can continue to serve. Dr. Alice Benton: And it’s not just about listening and receiving the wisdom, but about putting it into practice, especially with the New Life family that believes in these principles together, knows they’re broken, and wants to heal and is actively taking those steps. Because wisdom alone, information alone, is not enough. It needs to be practiced with other people. That’s that iron that sharpens iron. And I’ve never found better iron than at New Life. Brian Perez: Those formative years for me too were also, you know, no psychology — just whatever your pastor says, that’s all you need. Psychology was just man’s wisdom instead of God’s wisdom. Well, here at New Life, we combine these things, and we put God’s word first in front of everything that we do, because that’s what it’s all about. We’re not here to just tell you what we think — we search the scriptures and we give you godly advice, and we want to keep doing it. So if you can help us today, go to newlife.com, or call 1-800-NEW-LIFE, or text NLM to 28950. Thank you for your generosity. Email Question: Debbie Brian Perez: So we have several ways that you can ask your question. Our favorite way is when you call into the studio when we’re here taking calls, and you can find out more about that on our website, newlife.com/radio, which shows our recording schedule. It also gives you a phone number where you can leave a voicemail. And there’s also a form that you can fill out so that you can send us an email with your question. That is what Debbie did. Debbie asks, “How do I love and support my 22-year-old daughter without giving support to the lesbian lifestyle?” Debbie says her daughter is in a lesbian relationship. She’s never exhibited this tendency before. She’s not had any boyfriends, but she’s wanted one desperately. They’re Christian; she’s been raised in the church. She thinks God is okay with her lifestyle. “So how do I love and support her?” What do you guys say to Debbie? Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: I say love her and support her as the person. That’s hard, though, I think, for Debbie to be able to do, because Debbie’s not able to separate out her daughter’s relational activity from the person that she is. What I would wonder is: what has your relationship with her been like? What does love look like? What does it mean to love someone? I would go to scripture and look at what scripture says about love, and see if those are thoughts, tenets, behaviors, ways of being that you find in your relationship with your daughter. And then this is something I ask people regularly: how is that other person’s sex life affecting you? I think as Christians, we spend an enormous amount of time concerned about other people’s sexual health and sex life, and I just don’t see God being nearly as concerned about everybody else’s sex life as we are. I think we as Christians have made that a focal point, and we are doing a disservice. We are not introducing people to Jesus. We’re introducing people to rules and propriety, and Jesus came to set us free. Either we are free in Christ or we are not. And if I help someone know Jesus — I’ve introduced them to Jesus, I’ve walked through the Roman Road with them, they’ve accepted Christ and they know Jesus — the rest is not my business. I trust the Holy Spirit to do what he’s going to do. And if they end up in a homosexual relationship, drug-addicted, in a violent abusive relationship, anything — that is between them and God at that point. All God has called me to do is love God with all my heart, soul, and mind, and to love others as I love myself. So I think as Christians, we have to check ourselves. We are the ones falling out of line. I don’t have anything to do with your marriage — whether you are in a same-sex marriage or a gendered marriage, I have nothing to do with that. What God has called me to do is to help you know Jesus. And if I’ve done that, then I know I’ve done my work, and I trust the Holy Spirit to handle anything that God’s not pleased with. Dr. Alice Benton: Debbie, your question must have a lot of fear and pain to it, and I know I would feel similarly if I were in your shoes. We’re getting this question more and more frequently from other parents who wonder, “Why did my good Christian upbringing not seem to stick in this area of my child’s life?” — especially when your daughter sounds like she expressed a desire for a boyfriend for a long time. What a shock that she then introduces you to her girlfriend. I think you will not like some of the things that I have to say, because getting to know her partner is a way to love her and to love the partner. But I think that might not feel right to you to do. I think you can be a Christian influence in both of their lives more by your actions than by your words of opposition. There could be a tendency towards judgmentalism out of your fear — and I would have that same tendency in your shoes. And you might possibly be wondering, “Did I fail my daughter? What did I do wrong that this is a choice she has made?” So I want you to be really careful about judgmentalism coming out. I also think we are called to warn other believers when we see that there is sin behavior, or to warn those who are stumbling toward the edge. So I think it’s a parental obligation to say — once, with a whole lot of love and kindness and humility — “I am an imperfect parent, and I also need to point something out, because I love you so much. I am confused that you’re both a Christian and you’re choosing a homosexual relationship. What’s your understanding of what the Bible has to say about that? I really want to understand your perspective as a Christian.” Be more of a listener, Debbie, than a speaker. But once, it’s important to conclude with, “I disagree with you. I think this part of your relationship is out of alignment with God’s will, and I need to point that out because I love you and I don’t want you to have unnecessary suffering in your life. All the times I’ve been out of alignment with God’s will — my lying, my extramarital emotional affair, my excessive alcohol use — I was out of alignment with his will, and it brought suffering on me too. So I’m going to keep loving you, I’m going to keep praying for you, and I thank you that you heard this conversation from me.” That’s what I would have you share with your daughter. There’s a great book called Embodied by Preston Sprinkle. He’s a clinician who has specialized in this very thing: What do we do with both Christianity and same-sex desire, and how do we love well? And we do it a lot more with behavior than with words. Brian Perez: Isn’t loving and supporting the partner — Debbie was asking about her daughter, and you both gave great advice, but when we bring the partner into it, doesn’t it seem like we’re condoning the behavior? We’ve got the holidays coming up. People are going to probably start calling soon: “Do I invite them to Thanksgiving dinner? Do I invite them to our Christmas celebration?” Dr. Jacqui Mack-Harris: Well, I think, like Alice said, this is an opportunity for your witness. And it honestly doesn’t matter if you agree with the lifestyle or not. You’ve said you don’t agree — so in that, you have said, “This isn’t something I think is okay. I love you, but I’m concerned for you. I’m concerned for how this will impact your life.” That is your “I don’t agree.” But we are called to love others. We’re called to love our enemies. We’re called to love our neighbors. We’re called to love ourselves. We’re called to love God. We are not called to not love anybody. Period. And we are not doing a great job of that as Christians. So I agree that is one way to show your daughter love and acceptance of her as a person. You don’t have to accept someone’s experience or their life in order to validate them as a person. And so when her friend comes over, you have boundaries in place regardless of whether your child is dating someone you approve of or not, right? Hopefully they respect your home and they respect your rules. But you get to set boundaries. And you’re right, the holidays are coming up, and this definitely is going to be a topic at many tables, because some families are estranged, because it is preferable to not have the other person around than to have that discomfort of, “Well, we disagree with this lifestyle.” But I agree with Dr. Alice. I think it can be a way that your Christian witness can go forward. We have people in our life who don’t believe how we believe, and whose actions and behaviors are not the same as our own, but they know us and love us, and we know them and we love them. Dr. Alice Benton: If I had no sinners at my table, I wouldn’t be allowed there either. And Jesus gave a pretty neat example of going to the parties that were full of sinners, because the sinners are the ones that need him. I’m the one that needs him. Brian Perez: Yep. Debbie, thanks for submitting your question at newlife.com/radio. We’ll talk to you next time. Thanks for listening. We hope this program has helped you by giving you insights for handling the challenges you face in your life. We want you to know that we’re here for you, but you also need to know that New Life Live is a listener-supported ministry. To make your donation or to get any of the resources mentioned on today’s program, call 1-800-NEW-LIFE. That’s 1-800-639-5433, or online at newlife.com. Please join us again tomorrow for New Life Live. If you or someone you know is struggling If you or someone you love is thinking about suicide or self-harm, you don’t have to face it alone. Call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, or reach out to New Life at 1-800-NEW-LIFE (1-800-639-5433).

There are meetings happening in your organisation that you are not in. They take place in corridors, car parks, over lunch and in WhatsApp groups you do not know exist. In these conversations you would find out exactly what the staff think of the culture you have shaped and environment in which they work. Most leaders believe they have created psychological safety but the research shows there is usually a gap between the leaders perception and the reality their staff experience. In this episode James Rule explores that gap, asks the uncomfortable questions every leader should ask themselves to identify it and shares the key step every leader can take to establish psychological safety.KEY TAKEAWAYSWhy the warning signs of a lack of psychological safety have become largely invisible in hybrid and remote working environments. Three practical tests for a leader to establish if psychological safety truly exists in their team.The single most powerful thing you can do to truly establish psychological safety in your culture. Accelerate your growth and development with The Lonely Leader Academy If you want to work through some of these areas in more depth, to accelerate your learning and access tools, tactics and tips to drive performance and enhance fulfilment then check out The Lonely Leader Academy: https://tll.academy/RELATED EPISODES FROM THE ARCHIVEEpisode 22 - Creating psychological safety in a teamEpisode 35 - Leading a Hybrid TeamEpisode 12 - Eight Steps to a Quality CultureENJOYED THE EPISODE?James works with senior leaders, CEOs, and founders who want to perform at the highest level without losing what matters most in the process. If this conversation has prompted something for you professionally or personally James would genuinely love to hear from you.You can reach him directly via LinkedIn or through the website below. Everything shared is in complete confidence.ABOUT THE HOST James is an experienced mentor, coach and thought leader who works with a range of clients from FTSE 100 companies, SME´s the NHS and wider public and not for profit sectors.His twenty year career in elite sport initially as a professional rugby player but predominantly as a chief executive has given him an invaluable insight in managing the success, failures and pressures associated with leadership at the highest level.As a high performance coach James specialises in enhancing resilience and leadership development. He is a passionate advocate of the notion that to find lasting fulfilment we need to take a holistic view of high performance. CONNECT & CONTACT The Lonely Leader Academy: The Lonely Leaderwww.thelonelyleader.co.ukThe Lonely Leader's LinkedIn James' LinkedInInstagramhello@thelonelyleader.co.uk THIS SHOW WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY LONELY LEADER MEDIA NEWSLETTERSign Up to The Leadership Accelerator Newsletter for advice, inspiration and ideas, you'll also receive James' Top 10 Tips for Combating Your Fear of Public Speaking. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00:00 Show Start 00:00:46 Sly Flourish News: Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster Final Days — Articles and Appearances 00:03:50 Kickstarter Spotlight: Plate Mail Games Audio Tracks for your RPG 00:05:19 D&D & RPG News: Big Gencon News 00:06:24 D&D & RPG News: World of Warcraft and D&D 00:11:23 D&D & RPG News: Dark Sun 00:16:01 D&D & RPG News: Greyhawk Crown of the Witch Queen 00:19:54 D&D & RPG News: Star Wars D&D 00:22:44 Commentary: Universes Beyond is a Burned Brand 00:27:41 D&D & RPG News: Partnerships for FR, Ravenloft, and Eberron 00:30:54 Commentary: D&D Icons is Weird 00:35:07 Commentary: Death Saves is Weird Too 00:35:42 D&D & RPG News: Search, New App, and other D&D Beyond Stuff 00:41:27 D&D & RPG News: Free League Unbound, New One Ring, Dungeon World 2, Keith Baker, New Vampire Masquarade 00:43:53 Commentary: The Other Stuff in Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster 00:51:34 Patreon Question: Handling Missing Players 00:54:49 Patreon Question: Should Exploration and Roleplaying Have Stronger Procedures? 00:59:55 Patreon Question: Do the 8 Steps Work with All RPGs? Links Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster Kickstarter! Visit Sly Flourish Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Subscribe to the Sly Flourish RSS Feed Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Podcast (Ad Free!) The Lazy GM's Toolbox in Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster The Rest of the Stuff in Rise Geeknative Interview with Mike Shea by Egg Embry Mike on One Hit Point Podcast (YouTube) Mike on One Hit Point Podcast (Spotify) Mike on Gnome Stew's Gnomecast Mystic Arts on Eight Steps and Rise Shadowmain — Tales From the Tavern Q&A With Mike Shea Plate Mail games RPG audio files Kickstarter D&D Announcements World of Warcraft Dark Sun Greyhawk Adventure Star Wars Universes Beyond Ghostfire does Ravenloft; Kobold Press does Forgotten Realms; Visionary Productions does Eberron D&D Icons Death Saves D&D Beyond LFG Great interviews by Crit Hit the Giant Free League Unbound New One Ring backerkit campaign coming Dungeon World 2 Beta New Daggerheart setting by Keith Baker New Vampire the Masquerade

This episode offers a step-by-step guide for job seekers in Germany, covering eight key areas: market research, visa procedures, job search strategies, application creation, networking, active job searching, interview preparation, and post-job offer visa navigation. I highlight the importance of tailoring applications, understanding cultural nuances in interviews, and adopting a strategic approach to finding employment.Resources mentioned:⁠makeitingermany.com 

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00:00 Show Start 00:01:03 Sly Flourish News: Five Scenes, Expanding the Eight Steps 00:03:17 Sly Flourish News: Mike on What Would the Smart Party Do Podcast 00:05:09 Sly Flourish News: Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster Kickstarter Is Live 00:07:19 D&D & RPG News: 2026 ENNIES Nominations 00:12:45 Kickstarter Spotlight: Ereb Altor 00:15:12 Commentary: Expanding Each of the Eight Steps 00:41:15 DM Tip: Timing Your Sessions 00:51:51 Patreon Question: Building Worlds for Spelljammer 00:56:14 Patreon Question: Adding Cool Effects to Monuments Links Rise of the Lazy Gamemaster Kickstarter Visit Sly Flourish Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Subscribe to the Sly Flourish RSS Feed Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Podcast (Ad Free!) Five Scenes Expanding Each of the Eight Steps What Would the Smart Party Do 2026 ENNIE Nominations Ereb Altor Kickstarter

Send us Fan MailAs artificial intelligence reshapes the managed services landscape, MSPs are facing a defining moment. According to the MSP Poverty Line framework, developed by EChannelNews, organizations that fail to evolve risk falling behind, while those that embrace change can position themselves for long-term growth and profitability.The good news is that crossing the MSP Poverty Line is achievable. Based on industry research and insights from leading MSPs, eight key action plans have been developed that can help any size MSP consistently separate themselves from a struggling to adapt organization into a high-performing one. THE EIGHT STEPSThe first step is embracing visionary leadership. Successful MSP leaders approach AI strategically, balancing innovation with strong cybersecurity governance. Rather than viewing AI as a trend, they see it as a core business capability.Second, MSPs must strengthen their own brand identity. Organizations that define themselves primarily by the vendors they represent risk becoming interchangeable. The most successful MSPs focus on the outcomes they deliver rather than the products they sell.Third, businesses should integrate autonomous agentic AI across their operations. From service delivery to internal workflows, AI is becoming the foundation of modern MSP operations and enabling greater efficiency and scalability.Fourth, AI must be incorporated into sales and marketing strategies. Forward-thinking MSPs are leveraging automation, analytics, and AI-powered tools to improve customer engagement, generate leads, and accelerate growth.The fifth step is developing a deeper understanding of clients' business goals. Rather than focusing solely on technology, successful MSPs align their services with measurable business outcomes and competitive advantages.Sixth, MSPs need to stay ahead of industry trends. By acting as trusted advisors and maintaining a seat at clients' decision-making tables, they become indispensable strategic partners rather than service providers.The seventh step focuses on building a strong organizational culture. As automation becomes more prevalent, maintaining human connection, collaboration, and employee well-being becomes increasingly important. Organizations with healthy cultures are often more resilient and adaptable.Finally, MSPs must commit to continuous modernization. The pace of change in the channel is accelerating, and standing still is no longer an option. Businesses that continually evaluate their processes, service offerings, and market positioning are better equipped to respond to new opportunities and challenges.The MSP Poverty Line is not simply a measure of revenue or profitability. It represents a business's ability to adapt, innovate, and thrive in a rapidly evolving technology landscape. By focusing on these eight areas, MSPs can strengthen their foundations, create greater value for clients, and position themselves for sustained success in the AI-driven future.

Crime on a Thursday First, a look at the events of the day.Then, Inner Sanctum Mysteries, originally broadcast  June 4, 1946, 79 years ago, Eight Steps to Murder.  A newsman plans to murder a Broadway producer and marry the man's wife. Followed by Nick Carter Master Detective starring Lon Clark, originally broadcast June 4, 1946, 79 years ago, The Case of the Dictaphone Murders.   A recording of a bribe and then a murder..but where's the record?Then, Calling All Cars, originally broadcast June 4, 1935, 91 years ago, The Innocent Bride.  A bank has been held up in Long Beach. A Russian immigrant proposes marriage and spends lavishly. Followed by I Was a Communist for the FBI starring Dana Andrews, originally broadcast June 4, 1952, 74 years ago, Card Game in the Clouds.   A game of gin rummy en route to Buffalo leads to a microfilm scheme to get secret documents to the Communists.Finally, Claudia, originally broadcast June 4, 1948, 78 years ago, A Fishing We Will Go. Gone fishin'. Kathryn Bard and Paul Crabtree star.Thanks to Debbie B. for supporting our podcast by using the Buy Me a Coffee function at http://classicradio.streamCheck out Professor Bees Digestive Aid at profbees.com and use my promo code WYATT to save 10% when you order! 

Ciara tells PJ that because her beautiful daughter Lily lives with Pitt Hopkins Syndrome steps are out of the question and she needs a more suitable council property Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happiness Is a Skill: Neuroscience, Resilience, and the Triumph Steps FrameworkGuest: Beatriz Martinez-Peñalver, Licensed Psychotherapist and Creator of Triumph Steps Host: Julie RigaOverviewWhat if happiness was not just a feeling but a skill you could learn, practice, and master?In this episode of the Stay On Course Podcast, Julie Riga sits down with Beatriz Martinez-Peñalver, a licensed psychotherapist with over 30 years of experience and the creator of Triumph Steps, a neuroscience-based framework transforming the way clinicians, coaches, and institutions approach emotional literacy. Beatriz breaks down the science behind why thoughts shape reality, how fear disguises itself in daily life, and why resilience is a muscle that anyone can build. Whether you are navigating a difficult season, chasing purpose, or simply ready to fall in love with your life again, this episode delivers practical tools and real inspiration to help you stay on course.Happiness Is a Skill: Neuroscience, Resilience, and the Triumph Steps FrameworkAbout the GuestBeatriz Martinez-Peñalver is a licensed psychotherapist with over 30 years of experience, a community mental health center founder, and the creator of Triumph Steps. Her work bridges clinical therapy and purpose-driven coaching, making emotional fitness and resilience accessible to everyone who needs it. Over the past decade she has focused on prevention and coaching, believing every single person deserves to know how to be happier. Originally from Colombia, she serves clients globally with a team of certified coaches and clinicians.Key Topics CoveredThe Neuroscience of Happiness There is a direct connection between what we think and how we feel. Positive thoughts produce dopamine and serotonin. Anxious thoughts trigger a completely different neurochemical response. The core equation: Thought leads to Feeling, Feeling leads to Action, Action leads to Results across four life domains: Relationships, Health and Well-Being, Vocation, and Time and Financial Freedom.The Eight Steps to Emotional Fitness Happiness is a learnable skill and an emotional muscle. The Triumph Steps framework guides clients through eight steps beginning with identifying a clear vision, building a bridge from where they are today to where they want to be three years from now, and taking one small controllable step at a time.Befriending Fear Fear disguises itself as procrastination, avoidance, and victim thinking. Clients learn to name it, understand it, and act despite it. Something better always waits on the other side of fear.Purpose and Service as Ingredients for Happiness People who turn their gifts outward toward the good of others discover a deeper and lasting happiness. Purpose is not simply found. It is built through intentional service and the courage to ask how your talents can make a difference.Diaphragmatic Breathing Inhale deeply to a count of four, pause, then exhale slowly to a count of six. Repeat three to five times. This practice immediately resets the nervous system and reconnects you to your inner clarity and wisdom.Memorable Quotes"Not everybody needs mental health services, but every single person needs to know how to be happier.""Your past does not define your future. Your future is designed with the thoughts of today.""We act despite the fear. That is what gets us to triumph.""How would you love your life to look three years from now?"Connect with Beatriz Martinez-PeñalverEmail: beatriz@triumphsteps.com Website: www.triumphsteps.comConnect with Julie RigaExplore all of Julie Riga resources, books, and coaching programs at: https://stacklist.app/julierigaSubscribe to Stay On Course wherever you listen to podcasts and share this episode with anyone ready to build a life they love.#StayOnCourse #HappinessIsASkill #TriumphSteps #PurposeDrivenLeadership #TransformationJourney Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode, veteran trial lawyer John Farrell distinguishes between refreshing recollection and impeachment, two essential but sometimes conflated courtroom skills. Learn how to help your own witness recall facts on direct examination through refreshing recollection and how to effectively challenge an opposing witness on cross with a structured, high-impact impeachment technique. Packed with practical language and strategy (and a few demos along the way), this conversation offers clear guidance on when and how to deploy these important skills that every trial lawyer needs to master.Topics3:13    Difference between refreshing recollection and impeachment 4:54    What's wrong with “I don't know” during examination6:19    Using documents to refresh recollection7:24    What's wrong with “would” during refreshing recollection8:41   Refreshing recollection demo10:13 A crucial step to remember13:21 The point of impeachment14:37 Step 1 of impeaching by prior inconsistent statement15:35 Demo17:52 Why you should sound disappointed18:50 Demo19:20 Steps 2–623:21 Demo27:21 Why impeachment better be worth the effort30:05 Your tone through impeachment33:16 Impeachment by omission40:49 Consequences of a bad impeachment41:56 Again, make impeachment worth your while44:16 Signoff questions Quote“The reason [impeachment] is so important is that if you decide to impeach and you don't do it correctly or successfully, the witness has just been told they can lie all the time on the stand. You've lost control. If you do it really well the first time, and the next time they go off message, they say something else different, and [the witness goes], “Well, no, that's not right. It was Fact C.” And [you] go, “I don't think so. Let's go to your depo transcript.” [The witness will] go, “Okay, fine, fine, it was C,” because they don't want to go through that again. So I think it's an important tool.” John FarrellResourcesJohn Farrell (bio)Refreshing Recollection and Impeachment (article)Eight Steps for Handling Deposition Exhibits (podcast)Deposition articles (1, 2, 3)

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00:00 Show Start 00:01:05 Sly Flourish News: Quantum Ogres and the Eight Steps, Tagging RPGs, Secret Project Announcement Date 00:06:03 Kickstarter Spotlight: Demonic Grimoire for OSE 00:09:55 D&D & RPG News: Elric for 5e, DCC, and Dragonbane 00:13:19 Commentary: D&D Drops and Being a Good Steward of D&D 00:43:39 D&D & RPG News: Old Gus's Daggerheart Resource Document 00:48:00 Patreon Spotlight: Dyson Map Gallery Updated 00:50:12 DM Tip: Scenes and Situations 00:58:21 Patreon Question: Running Classic Adventures with 5e 01:03:34 Patreon Question: Strong Finishes for Strong Starts Links Visit Sly Flourish Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Subscribe to the Sly Flourish RSS Feed Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Podcast (Ad Free!) Quantum Ogres and the Eight Steps Defining RPGs with Tags Demonic Grimoire for OSE Elric for DCC, 5e Elric for Dragonbane D&D Beyond Drops Games Radar Interview with Chris Cocks Old Gus's Daggerheart Resources Scenes and Situations

In this episode of Why Distance Learning, your hosts talk with Dr. Helaine Marshall — retired professor of education at Long Island University Hudson and creator of SOFLA, the Synchronous Online Flipped Learning Approach — about the pedagogy most online courses never get around to designing, and what it costs when they don't. Drawing on five years of development work, Community of Inquiry theory, and her own linguistics teaching, Helaine walks through an eight-step cycle that treats synchronous virtual instruction as its own medium rather than a degraded version of in-person teaching. The reframe at the center of the conversation: online learning isn't a tool problem, it's a design problem — and empowerment isn't something teachers do to students, it's what happens when the conditions are built for it.Together, the hosts and Helaine explore why most virtual classrooms default to lecture-over-Zoom, the eight-step SOFLA cycle that weaves asynchronous pre-work with structured synchronous sessions, the two steps that actually determine whether it succeeds (the SHAC share-out protocol and "preview and discovery"), the control issues that make teachers resist the model, and how SOFLA adapts across content areas — from linguistics to Boyle's Law — and age groups. They also work through Helaine's four E's framework — equity, enrichment, engagement, empowerment — and a single linguistic observation that reframes how to think about agency in virtual classrooms: empowerment is not a transitive verb.Key TopicsThe eight-step SOFLA cycle: pre-work, sign-in, whole group application, breakouts, share-out, preview and discovery, assignment instructions, reflectionWhy pedagogy outlasts tech tools — and why most online teaching skips pedagogy entirelyThe SHAC protocol for accountable, substantive peer feedback"Preview and discovery" as the motivational hinge between lessonsThe four E's: equity, enrichment, engagement, empowermentP-P-R-R (patience, persistence, reflection, renewal) for teachers new to the modelAdapting SOFLA across content areas, age groups, and even in-person classrooms4. Links & ResourcesSOFLA® (book, forthcoming May 2026) — Helaine W. Marshall and Ilka Kostka, University of Michigan Press, Brief Instructional Guide Series: https://press.umich.edu/Books/S/SOFLA-RHelaine's SOFLA hub — overview, training team, and resources: https://malpeducation.com/sofla/Helaine's bio and full publication list — https://malpeducation.com/our-experts/helaine-w-marshall/"Fostering Teaching Presence through the Synchronous Online Flipped Learning Approach" — Marshall & Kostka, TESL-EJ, Vol. 24 (open access): https://tesl-ej.org/wordpress/issues/volume24/ej94/ej94int/Breaking New Ground for SLIFE: The Mutually Adaptive Learning Paradigm, 2nd ed. (2023) — Helaine's other signature framework (MALP), University of Michigan PressMeeting the Needs of SLIFE: A Guide for Educators, 2nd ed. — Marshall, DeCapua, and Tang, University of Michigan PressPerusall — the social annotation platform Helaine uses for pre-work: https://www.perusall.com/Flipped Learning Network — founded by Jon Bergmann and Aaron Sams, referenced as the origin of flipped learning: https://flippedlearning.org/Community of Inquiry framework — Garrison, Anderson & Archer, the theoretical grounding for teaching presence: https://coi.athabascau.ca/CILC — Center for Interactive Learning and Collaboration: https://cilc.orgBanyan Global Learning — https://banyangloballearning.com/global-learning-live/Guest Bio: Dr. Helaine W. MarshallDr. Helaine W. Marshall is the creator of two instructional frameworks — SOFLA (Synchronous Online Flipped Learning Approach) and MALP (Mutually Adaptive Learning Paradigm) — and currently serves as president of MALP, LLC, where she trains educators on both models. Her work centers on culturally responsive-sustaining education and online flipped learning, particularly for teachers working with language learners and students whose prior schooling has been disrupted. She is retired Professor of Education and Director of Language Education Programs at Long Island University – Hudson, has published three books with University of Michigan Press, and received the 2023 Lifetime Achievement Award from New York State TESOL.About the Hosts: Seth Fleischauer is the founder of Banyan Global Learning and host of Why Distance Learning. Through Banyan, he designs live virtual programs that connect K-12 classrooms to global peers and expert facilitators — building the kind of structured, human-centered distance learning the podcast explores. See https://banyangloballearning.com/Tami Moehring and Allyson Mitchell work with CILC, the Center for Interactive Learning and Collaboration, to help educators implement high-quality live virtual learning experiences across grade levels. Discover more at CILC.org.

This semon was captured at Mosaic Nac on 1/11/2026 Subscribe for more messages from Mosaic NAC and join the journey of walking confidently with God. Stay connected:

Rob Henson of Solheim Stewardship joins Kara and Matt to share how capital campaigns are much more than just fundraising. Henson maintains that the work of a campaign is woven into the fabric of a congregation's larger work. Resources Solheim Stewardship (organization) Understanding the Stages of a Nonprofit Capital Campaign (article) The Giving Institute's Eight Steps for Selecting Fundraising Counsel (article) The African American Church: Financial Business & Operations Management Guide For Church Leadership (book)

TEATIME WITH MISS LIZ SERVES: SHAMAYNE OLIVIA KOTFA TitleShoes That Fit Her Soul: Reclaiming Identity & Finding Your VoiceTaglineThe journey back to yourself begins with one brave step. March 10th | 7 PM EST TopicIdentity, emotional wellness, healing from childhood trauma, and rediscovering purpose through self-awareness. In this powerful returning Teatime, Miss Liz welcomes Shamayne Olivia Kotfas, founder and CEO of Shoes That Fit Her Soul, LLC. After a 16-year career at Humana, where she served in leadership roles, led wellness initiatives, and supported women's empowerment programs, Shamayne answered a deeper calling. Her personal journey began with one profound question: “Who am I?”Through years of self-discovery, healing from generational trauma, and professional leadership experience, Shamayne created her transformational Eight Steps to Reclaim Your Sense of Self, Discover Your Voice, and Step Into Your Light. Her workshops, coaching, and book help women move beyond limiting patterns, establish healthy boundaries, and rediscover their voice and purpose.This Teatime explores identity, emotional maturity, relationships, and the courage it takes to start over and live authentically.“Welcome to Teatime with Miss Liz, where I don't serve a beverage — I serve real-life changemakers.Today I welcome back Shamayne Olivia Kotfas, a woman who turned a simple question — ‘Who am I?' — into a powerful journey of healing, identity, and purpose.”Shamayne reminds us that rediscovering ourselves is not about becoming someone new — it is about remembering who we truly are. When we learn to set boundaries, heal from the past, and trust our voice, we begin walking in shoes that truly fit our soul. Shamayne Olivia Kotfas is a life coach, speaker, and founder of Shoes That Fit Her Soul, LLC. After a 16-year career with Humana, she dedicated her work to helping women reclaim their identity, heal from generational trauma, and rediscover their voice through emotional wellness, mindfulness, and transformational coaching.• Reclaiming Your Sense of Self• Emotional Immaturity & Healing• Childhood Trauma Awareness• Healthy Boundaries & Relationships• Divorce, Loss & Life Transitions• Finding Your Voice & Core Values• Starting Over with Vision & Purpose• Passion and Authenticity in the Workplace#TeatimeWithMissLiz#ShamayneOliviaKotfas#ShoesThatFitHerSoul#EmotionalWellness#TranscendEmbraceEnvision New to streaming or looking to level up? Check out StreamYard and get a $10 discount! 

Lydia T. Blanco shares insights on the power of asking, manifesting, and living intentionally. She discusses how to ask boldly, be clear in your desires, and trust the process to attract abundance and fulfillment.Key TakeawaysThe importance of asking boldly and without fearHow to be clear and intentional in your requestsThe role of gratitude and humility in manifestingVisualization techniques to attract what you wantTrusting the process and believing in yourselfChapters00:00 Introduction and Host's Personal Reflection00:04 The Power of Manifestation and Asking the Universe01:05 Asking and Receiving: Biblical and Spiritual Perspectives02:32 Letting Go and Surrendering to Receive03:21 The Weight of Words and Intentional Asking05:04 Overcoming Fear in Asking for What You Want06:31 Clarity and Specificity in Your Requests07:36 The Power of Mindful and Intentional Words10:36 The Law of Attraction and Mindful Speech12:41 Eight Steps to Manifestation from Mindvalley16:58 Recap of Manifestation Principles and EncouragementStay Connected@LifeWillBePod

I'm back with another fortnightly In My Opinion episode - sharing running observations, Q&A and personal updates. Train with Matt: https://sweatelitecoaching.com/matt-fox/ Private Podcast Feed + Discord: https://www.sweatelite.co/shareholders/ Contact: matt@sweatelite.co Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mattinglisfox/ Strava Training Log: https://www.strava.com/athletes/6248359 I recorded this ramble episode from Phuket during a 10-day Thailand and Bali trip where I've been catching up with friends while doing some work. Part of the trip included visiting Thanyapura Sports Resort to see if it might work as a future Globe Runners Asia training camp location. I talk about some of the longevity content from Brian Johnson and walk through his "eight steps" framework - doing hard things, building a bedtime routine, starting the day with purpose, future-proofing your body, treating food like medicine, killing distractions, removing isolation, and avoiding motivational garbage. From there I discuss Ben Felton racing two half marathons on consecutive weekends and use it as a jumping off point to talk about training and racing more by feel rather than being overly dependent on rigid pacing data. I also cover the Tokyo Marathon, including frustrations with the race tracking app and a breakdown of Jake Barraclough's Tokyo build - his high mileage approach, injury concerns, livestreams during the build up, race plan doubts, and the eventual DNF. I mention other performances from the weekend including Nick Bester running 2:25 and highlight SECA member Merna finishing Tokyo while fasting during Ramadan. Later in the episode I bring back Workouts of the Week with sessions for the 5K/10K, half marathon and marathon, read some hate mail, discuss emails about GLP-1 weight loss drugs and how they might affect fueling for endurance athletes, share Mark from Finland's perspective on the doping crisis in Kenya, and finish by answering a question about Luke's approach to the marathon. Topics 00:00 - Welcome and Agenda 03:43 - Thailand Trip and Training Camp Idea 05:44 - Brian Johnson Longevity Lessons 07:56 - Eight Steps and Key Quotes 18:53 - Ben Felton and Racing by Feel 23:39 - Training Without Data Obsession 27:50 - Tokyo Marathon App Rant 28:40 - Jake Barraclough's Tokyo Build Up 30:54 - Taper Doubts and Volume Fear 33:17 - Race Plan and DNF Breakdown 34:14 - Rethinking Jake's Training 37:16 - Shout out Merna - SECA Member running Tokyo fasted 38:49 - Workouts of the Week Return 40:02 - 5K / 10K Ladder Session 41:04 - Half Marathon Track Alternations 42:30 - Marathon 30K Progression 44:21 - Hate Mail and Ozempic Debate 53:29 - Kenya Doping Context Email from Marc 56:40 - Luke's Osaka Marathon and Training Takeaways 01:00:43 - Wrap Up

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00:00 Show Start 00:00:54 Sly Flourish News: Greed, Heroism, and Wonder; Do the Eight Steps work for other RPGs?; new secret project packet next week 00:04:12 Patreon Question: Character Creation During Session Zeros for Traveler Online 00:06:51 Kickstarter Spotlight: Stoneshatter Tomb 00:08:38 Commentary: More Dragonbane Thoughts 00:22:15 Commentary: Daggerheart Review Article and Thoughts 00:37:15 Commentary: Discord Enshittification 00:46:41 DM Tip: Move Steps Forward 00:54:07 Patreon Question: What Makes You Play 5e? 01:00:03 Patreon Question: Character Creation During Session Zeros for Traveler Online 01:02:49 Patreon Question: Managing Challenge with Sidekicks Links Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Greed, Heroism, Wonder Do the Eight Steps Work for Other RPGs? Pathfinder 2 Bundle Stoneshatter Tomb Kickstarter Daggerheart, a Dishonest Review Full of Lies Communities are not fungible

In this episode, Luke Gromer sits down with legendary University of Missouri Head Wrestling Coach Brian Smith to dissect the philosophy behind his nearly three decades of sustained success: "Tiger Style." Smith details the evolution of his program's four core pillars—Believe, Compete, One More, and Expect to Win—and shares how he transformed a written vision into a living culture that empowers athletes to take ownership of their development. The conversation dives into actionable strategies for coaches, including the implementation of "Mental Mondays" and "Grateful Fridays" to foster emotional intelligence, the rationale behind high-intensity 90-minute practice sessions over marathon training, and the critical role of personal morning routines in self-leadership. This discussion offers a masterclass in building a process-driven environment where athletes embrace vulnerability through "tough talks" and develop character that outlasts their athletic careers.—RYG x NIKE SPORTS CAMPSThe Better Coaching Podcast is powered by RYG Athletics, a proud provider of NIKE Sports Camps.If you're interested in becoming one of our NIKE Sports Camp directors, fill out the form below.Director interest form:⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://forms.gle/Bo4otGjRjDkju1xp8⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠RYG Website:⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://rygathletics.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—FREE PODCAST NOTES, NEWSLETTER, & COACHES COMMUNITYClick the link below to download the show notes, subscribe to our newsletter, or join the community!

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00:00 Show Start 00:00:53 Sly Flourish News: 5e Crafting, Single-Encounter Situations, 5eADB Dark Mode, Tower of Kartan 00:05:42 Sly Flourish News: Top Ten Articles of 2025 00:13:38 D&D & RPG News: Tim Kask Passes Away 00:14:37 D&D & RPG News: James Haeck Joins WOTC 00:15:13 D&D & RPG News: Shannon Appelcline on RPG Business in 2025 00:16:09 Commentary: Stranger Things Series Finale & D&D 00:29:31 DM Tip: On Puzzles 00:50:54 Patreon Question: Prepping Cities the Lazy Way 00:54:37 Patreon Question: Taking Notes During a Game Links Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: How to Get Your Group to Play Other RPGs The Secret of the Eight Steps of Lazy Game Prep Mashing Up the Eight Steps Build a Campaign-Unique Faction List Shadowdark House Rules Build Characters Quickly in D&D 2024 Lazy Map Annotation Avoid Removing Player Agency Lazy World Building Two Different 5e Games at the Same Table Tim Kask passed away James Haeck joins WOTC as a senior game designer Shannon Appelcline's Year-end Review

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00 Show Start 01:04 Sly Flourish News: Mash Up the Eight Steps, How to Cheat at RPGs, Dread Necropolis, 03:47 Sly Flourish News: New RPGs Hitting My Desk 10:17 D&D & RPG News: Fantasy Grounds Free to Play and Online Compendium 13:20 D&D & RPG News: D&D Nexus on Demiplane 17:10 Commentary: Is Locally Owned Software Important? 23:57 D&D & RPG News: Apocalypse World Burned Over AMA on Reddit 24:56 Commentary: What Is the OSR? 50:38 DM Tip: Pre-Game Rituals 57:42 Patreon Question: Generating Random Adventures 01:02:26 Patreon Question: Stranger Things D&D Box To Bring In New Players Links Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Mashing Up the Eight Steps When and How to Cheat when Running RPGs Fantasy Grounds Free with Online Web Viewer New D&D Nexus on Demiplane Vincent Baker AMA on Apocalypse World Burned Over Using REAL CULT TACTICS to improve your D&D group

ABOUT THE EPISODE:Your 3am Google search spiral feels beyond frustrating when you're usually the one with answers. In this week's solo episode I acknowledge the unique exhaustion of spinning your wheels while your child struggles, and offer a concrete 8-step menu of ways to move from wishing into actionable planning and hope. If your existing parenting toolkit isn't working to create positive change in your family this episode will offer ways to rethink and recharge. The best news is, when you change yourself, the rest of the family system cannot not change. And that's why we start with you.What you'll learn:The distinction between wishing vs. having real hope Hope Theory: agency + pathways = real hopeWhy even highly capable parents get stuckThe paralysis that comes from information overload without implementationThe paradox of excelling everywhere except with being able to help your childUsing research as sophisticated avoidanceEPISODE RESOURCES:8-Step downloadable template for creating your planHelping Families Help - Provider Directory for CRAFT-Trained Coaches and TherapistsParent Like a Hostage Negotiator Hopestream episode 295Apply for a scholarship for The Stream Community (for moms and female caregivers)This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream CommunityLearn about The Stream, our private online community for momsFind us on Instagram hereFind us on YouTube hereDownload a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and AlcoholHopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

Teatime with Miss Liz serves Shamayne Olivia Kotfas — Author, Speaker & Founder of Shoes That Fit Her Soul, LLC Miss Liz doesn't serve a beverage — she serves real-life changemakers.This Teatime, she serves Shamayne Olivia Kotfas, author, coach, and founder of Shoes That Fit Her Soul, LLC. From trauma to transformation, Shamayne guides women through eight steps to reclaim their sense of self, rediscover their voice, and step boldly into their light. Calm. Authentic. Curious.Because healing begins when we remember who we are. November 11th, 3 PM EST LIVE on all Miss Liz Teatime Beautiful, for Miss Liz Teatime — Shamayne Olivia Kotfas fits perfectly into my healing and empowerment Teatime lineup. Her story of rediscovery and authenticity blends seamlessly with your Transcend • Embrace • Envision message. TopicEight Steps to Reclaim Your Sense of Self: Discover Your Voice and Step Into Your Light IntroductionMiss Liz will pour a cup of self-discovery, truth, and transformation with Shamayne Olivia Kotfas, author, speaker, and founder of Shoes That Fit Her Soul, LLC. After decades of asking one powerful question—“Who am I?”—Shamayne turned her journey of self-reclamation into a roadmap for others through her signature workshop and upcoming book, Eight Steps to Reclaim Your Sense of Self. Drawing from her corporate career and personal experience with generational trauma, Shamayne helps women find their voice, heal emotional wounds, and rediscover the fun, authentic, and curious parts of themselves they thought were lost. She reminds us that the path to peace isn't about becoming someone new—it's about coming home to who we've always been. Closing SummaryAs the Teatime closes, Shamayne will leave us with this truth: you can't heal by becoming smaller—you heal by standing in your own light. Through her eight transformative steps, she shows us that reclaiming identity begins with curiosity, grows through authenticity, and blossoms when we allow ourselves to have fun again.“When you wear shoes that fit your soul, every step forward feels like freedom.” — Shamayne Olivia Kotfas. May tonight's conversation remind you to pause, breathe, and begin again—one honest step closer to the woman you were always meant to be.#TeatimeWithMissLiz #MissLizsTEE #ShamayneOliviaKotfas #ShoesThatFitHerSoul #ReclaimYourself #FindYourVoice #StepIntoYourLight #HealingJourney #TeachingEducationalAwareness #TranscendEmbraceEnvision #RealLifeChangemakers #OneCupAtATime #MissLizTee New to streaming or looking to level up? Check out StreamYard and get $10 discount!  OnlineLive Videohttps://shoesthatfithersoul.com/

In this episode of the Woman Warrior Podcast, Dr. Satyavani and Prajna discuss the crucial connection between wellness, longevity, and spirituality. They delve into the consciousness model from Ayurvedic teachings, emphasizing the importance of balanced energy, mental clarity, and intuitive health. 00:00 Welcome to the Woman Warrior Podcast02:45 Wrapping Up the Year10:17 Wellness Check-In25:06 The Power of Patience and Consistency27:00 Eight Steps to Live to 10035:08 The Consciousness Model and Longevity37:05 Understanding Energy and Information51:10 The Importance of Sleep and Rejuvenation53:59 Preventing Disease and Blockages56:35 Final Thoughts and Call to ActionBe sure to Like and Subscribe for more! For more information, please visit: https://www.womenswarriorsacademy.com Follow us on Instagram + Facebook! https://www.instagram.com/womanwarrioracademy/https://www.facebook.com/womanwarrioracademyJoin our Online Circle Community for FREE!https://login.circle.so/sign_up?request_host=the-woman-warrior-academy.circle.so&user%5Binvitation_token%5D=a26695ef6578f459ddedeafcb0093fde147b242e-1e858068-670b-46a5-94a6-dafa76efc9b2#email

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00 Show Start 00:36 Sly Flourish News: Secret of the Eight Steps and Lazy Map Annotations 01:43 Sly Flourish News: New Hat, Coffee Cup, and Calendar on the Store 04:29 Sly Flourish News: Key of Worlds 15 Releasing This week! 07:32 Sly Flourish News: Upcoming Conventions 09:16 Sly Flourish News: 5e, OSR, and Shadowdark on Dungeon Master Diaries 09:54 Kickstarter Spotlight: Scorched Basin by Homie and the Dude 12:50 Kickstarter Spotlight: Northlands by Kobold Press 30:15 Commentary: Daggerheart Initiative Feedback 37:36 Commentary: Lots Of You Play Lots of Different RPGs 44:59 DM Tip: Lazy 5e Crafting Guidelines 59:06 Patreon Question: Create a New or Use an Existing Location for Homebrew Adventures in Published Campaign Worlds 01:03:47 Patreon Question: Where to Spend time on Campaign Building 01:09:29 Patreon Question: Prepping Dungeons When you Don't Know Their Path Links The Secret of the Eight Steps of Lazy Game Prep Lazy Map Annotation Gamehole Con PAGE 3 Con Mike on Dungeon Master Diaries Talking about 5e and OSR and Shadowdark Homie and the Dude Scorched Basin  Northlands Kickstarter Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books:

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00 Show Start 00:44 Sly Flourish News: Track Turns the Shadowdark Way, The Secret of the Eight Steps of Lazy GM Prep 02:16 Sly Flourish News: 300 Room Descriptions 09:06 D&D & RPG News: DMs Guild Humble Bundle 12:26 D&D & RPG News: Dungeon Master Diaries on Playing Games Online 14:07 Commentary: Daggerheart Initial Thoughts 50:17 DM Tip: Roll for Monster Targets 56:57 Patreon Question: Dealing with the Mid-Campaign Blues 01:02:12 Patreon Question: Getting Players to Spend Treasure Links Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: Track Turns the Shadowdark Way The Secret of the Eight Steps of Lazy Game Prep Room descriptions in the Lazy GM Resource Doc DMs Guild Humble Bundle Dungeon Master Diaries – Playing Online Daggerheart

On this episode of the Old Time Radiocast we present you with two stories from the classic radio program Inner Sanctum Mysteries! Check out all of our podcasts at CrypticCountyPodcasts.com where you'll find shows like Let's Not Meet: A True Horror Podcast and Odd Trails.  

Emily Kasriel reveals how to build powerful connections with anyone through her eight-step listening process.— YOU'LL LEARN — 1) Why every professional needs to master listening2) A demo of the listening approach3) How one question leads to deeper conversationsSubscribe or visit AwesomeAtYourJob.com/ep1069 for clickable versions of the links below. — ABOUT EMILY — Emily Kasriel has had a distinguished career at the BBC for over two decades including roles as an award-winning journalist, editor and media executive. She developed the Deep Listening approach as a Senior Visiting Research Fellow at King's College Policy Institute in London, drawing on her experience as an accredited executive coach and workplace mediator. Previously, she's been a Visiting Fellow at Said Business School at Oxford University, and a Senior Advisor to the Skoll Foundation. An MA graduate of the University of Oxford and Syracuse University's Maxwell School of Citizenship and Public Affairs (as a Rotary International Fellow), she lives in London. An academic paper demonstrating the impact of Kasriel's Deep Listening approach has just been published (Feb 2025) by the Journal of Applied Social Psychology. • Book: Deep Listening: Transform Your Relationships with Family, Friends, and Foes―Transformational Communication, Listening, and Empathy Through an 8-Step Method • Research: “Deep Listening Training to Bridge Divides: Fostering Attitudinal Change through Intimacy and Self-Insight” with F. K. Tia Moin, Guy Itzchakov, and Netta Weinstein• LinkedIn: Emily Kasriel• Website: EmilyKasriel.com— RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE SHOW — • Research: “Silence is golden: Extended silence, deliberative mindset, and value creation in negotiation.” by Jared Curhan, et al. • Book: On Becoming A Person: A Therapist's View on Psychotherapy, Humanistic Psychology, and the Path to Personal Growth by Carl Rogers• Book: The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves by Stephen Grosz• Book: Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman— THANK YOU SPONSORS! — • Strawberry.me. Claim your $50 credit and build momentum in your career with Strawberry.me/Awesome• Quince. Get free shipping and 365-day returns on your order with Quince.com/Awesome• Plaud.ai. Use the code AWESOME and get a discount on your orderSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Depositions are a key building block in legal disputes, especially for cases that proceed to trial. According to veteran trial lawyer John Farrell, properly handling an exhibit so it's admissible at trial is an overlooked skill that can, and should, be practiced until it becomes second nature. In this episode, John reveals eight crucial steps for handling documents that ensure your deposition flows smoothly and exhibits are admitted for trial. He breaks down the process step by step, gives the exact sample language that ensures exhibits are properly marked and admitted, and suggests ways to keep court reporters and judges pleased with your professionalism. Topics3:59  Asking questions before marking a document  5:35  When witnesses want to see a document first7:48  Making deposition exhibits admissible at trial8:30  Eight steps for handling exhibits: Step 19:36  Step 210:35  Step 312:08  Demonstrations of marking different documents25:26  Step 4 , and helping the court reporter27:59  Step 5, and the important question to ask your witness29:12  Step 6, and two more important questions32:15  Step 733:37  Step 835:35  Three-article series on depositions37:23  Signoff questions Quote“‘Bears the word' . . . is the safe phrase that judges like to hear.” John FarrellResourcesJohn Farrell (bio)Deposition articles (1, 2, 3)Refreshing Recollection and Impeachment (article)

This week I had the pleasure of sitting down with Annemarie Lafferty, a woman who has dedicated the majority of her life helping first responders heal from past traumas and chronic injuries. Traditional modalities treat symptoms, Annmarie addresses the root cause thus removing the source of the pain both physically and emotionally. I know that, I don't know, and Annmarie was excellent at explaining concepts and theories in an easy to understand way. Sit back and give this episode a listen and walk away better informed, and with some new tools to address trauma and pain.  More about Annemarie: Mind-Body Medicine sessions and FCOA that release cellular trauma for first responders and everyday clients! Great for acute and chronic injuries as well as persisting behaviors that western medicine has been unable to resolve.Groups, EMS agencies and individuals welcome! Get brain and body working together.Founder-Practitioner at Healing Within Wellness since 2015. Getting to the root cause of chronic injury and trauma in EMS personnel. NET, FCOA, Energy Medicine, Reiki, Advanced Trauma Mind-Body Medicine Facilitator, Amazon author of "Eight Steps to Uncovering Who You Really Are" and past KPCA Radio 103.3FM Programmer/ Host of "The Healing Within Show." Ret. EMT, Ret. RDA in pediatrics. Founder-Owner Healing Within Wellness Sprayshttp://www.healingwithin.us/healingwithin11@gmail.comhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/annemarie-lafferty-cecp-424b00a0/https://youtu.be/lQGx0kTgFk8?si=F63wacJHFKPTJawVThank you for taking the time to give this podcast a listen. If you would like more information on other Law enforcement Life Coach initiatives, our "Sometimes Heroes Need Help" wellness seminar or our One-On-One life coaching please visit :www.lawenforcementlifecoach.comJohn@lawenforcementlifecoach.comAnd if you would like to watch the interview you can view it in it's entirety on the Law Enforcement Life Coach YouTube Channel : https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCib6HRqAFO08gAkZQ-B9Ajw/videos/upload?filter=%5B%5D&sort=%7B%22columnType%22%3A%22date%22%2C%22sortOrder%22%3A%22DESCENDING%22%7D

In this episode of the Volunteer Nation Podcast, Tobi Johnson breaks down exactly what it takes to hire a future proof volunteer coordinator who can lead with confidence and adaptability. Given how vital this role is in representing your organization and engaging your volunteers, hiring the right person matters more than ever! Tobi walks you through 8 essential steps to build a strong hiring foundation. From understanding volunteer coordination best practices and deciding if the position should be paid or volunteer, to writing a compelling job description and offering a fair wage. She also dives into how to assess both credentials and those often-overlooked people and paperwork skills. You'll also learn why emotional intelligence, clear boundaries, and smart use of technology are game changers in this role. If you're looking to build a thriving volunteer program, this episode is your go-to guide for hiring a future-proof leader who's ready to grow with your mission.  Full show notes: 158. How to Hire a Future Proof Volunteer Coordinator Volunteer Coordinator - Episode Highlights [00:50] - The Importance of Hiring a Future-Proof Volunteer Coordinator [03:38] - Understanding Job Titles and Definitions [07:48] - Why Future-Proofing Matters [12:21] - Eight Steps to Hiring Success [31:08] - The Role of Credentials and Emotional Intelligence [39:08] - Supporting Your New Hire [44:01] - Free Hiring Guide Helpful Links VolunteerPro Impact Lab Volunteer Management Progress Report Volunteer Nation Episode #93: The 5 Phases of Successful Volunteer Coordination Volunteer Nation Episode #96: Volunteer Work or Staff Position How to Decide Volunteer Nation Episode #026: Hiring? What to Include in Your Volunteer Coordinator Job Description Volunteer Nation Episode #119: Volunteer Manager Salary & Career Paths with Megan Vixie  Volunteer Nation Episode #055: How to Get Your CVA Credential with Faiza VenzantVolunteer Nation Episode #67: How to Set Up a New Volunteer Coordinator for Success Volunteer Nation Episode #145: Build Your Program with the NEW VolunteerPro Volunteer Impact Lab! FREE Hiring Guide - How to Hire a Kick A** Volunteer Manager  Thanks for listening to this episode of the Volunteer Nation podcast. If you enjoyed it, please be sure to subscribe, rate, and review so we can reach more people like you who want to improve the impact of their good cause. For more tips and notes from the show, check us out at TobiJohnson.com. For any comments or questions, email us at WeCare@VolPro.net.

In the earliest days of Suspense, Berry Kroeger introduced each week's story as the "Man in Black." Years later, this talented and versatile actor would step into starring roles on "radio's outstanding theatre of thrills." We'll hear him in an adaptation of W.F. Harvey's "August Heat" (originally aired on CBS on March 20, 1948) and as a would-be murderer who develops unusual mental powers in "It's All In Your Mind" (AFRS rebroadcast from July 20, 1958). Plus we'll hear more of his radio performances that show off his range - as a killer in "Eight Steps to Murder" from Inner Sanctum (originally aired on CBS on June 4, 1946) and as a spy on a daring mission in "Confidential Agent" from Escape (originally aired on CBS on April 2, 1949).

Real, lasting change takes more than a checklist- it requires ownership, urgency, and daily discipline. Follow these eight steps to break the status quo and build momentum that sticks!

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin made conscious uncoupling famous in 2014. But where does it stand a decade later? When couples decide to part ways, the process can feel overwhelming and painful. But conscious uncoupling offers an alternative: a mindful way to separate that prioritizes respect, communication, and the well-being of everyone involved, including kids if you have them. Conscious uncoupling encourages a shift in focus, away from blame and resentment, toward healing, growth, and a peaceful, ongoing relationship as co-parents or an ability to move on in a healthy way if you don't have kids. If you're contemplating or already facing separation and wondering how to navigate it with kindness and respect, today is for you. We'll dive into what conscious uncoupling is, what you have to do on your own, strategies for effective co-parenting, and my eight steps for separating peacefully. ____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/conscious-uncoupling-eight-steps-to-separate-peacefully Grab my Co-Parenting Meeting Checklist: https://abbymedcalf.com/coparenting-checklist Learn how to create and hold healthy, loving boundaries. Buy my newest book on Amazon, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries Want to feel happier and more connected in your relationship? Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won't Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book____________________________ Subscribe today to get my love letter to you! This biweekly reminder will keep you on the path to creating connected, happy relationships (especially the one with yourself!). https://abbymedcalf.com For more quick tips, subscribe to my YouTube channel: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you've got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop Say hello on social:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abbymedcalfInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthrivingLinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthrivingYouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On today's Framework Friday, Eight Steps to Effective Strategic Communication, I'm going to share the National Incident Management System (NIMS) 8-step process that many Public Information Officers (PIO) use to effectively communicate before, during, and after disasters.Reference: page 20 of the National Incident Management System (NIMS) Basic Guidance for Public Information Officers (PIOs)

In this episode, we delve into the chilling tale of "Memory of a Murder," a gripping narrative that intertwines suspense and intrigue. The story unfolds through the eyes of Harry Jonas, a seemingly ordinary man who becomes embroiled in a sinister plot involving murder and deception. The narrative begins with Harry reflecting on a haunting memory from Wingate Cemetery, where he witnesses a murder that sets the stage for the ensuing drama. He spots a gravedigger, whose pale visage and sinister actions leave Harry shaken. As he hides behind a tombstone, he discovers a medal linked to a man named Nino, a key player in the unfolding mystery. This initial encounter foreshadows the eerie events that will lead Harry deeper into a world of illusion and treachery.Harry soon finds himself working at a vaudeville theater, under the watchful eye of the enigmatic Constantine, who is not just a performer but a master manipulator with a flair for the dramatic. As tensions rise, Harry's attraction to Marietta, the beautiful assistant of Constantine, complicates matters further. Harry learns that Constantine may have a dark past connected to the disappearance of Nino, and the peculiar medal serves as a sinister token of fate, suggesting that those connected to its legacy are doomed.With each act of the performance, Harry's fears manifest into reality as he realizes that Marietta's life is in danger. A series of dramatic illusions—the guillotine, the knife-throwing act—become twisted symbols of impending doom. As the events unfold on stage, they parallel the real-life danger lurking backstage. Harry's desperation to protect Marietta propels him into a frantic race against time, battling not only Constantine but the tangled web of illusions they all inhabit.The gripping climax reveals Harry's harrowing struggles as he confronts the truth behind Constantine's dark intentions. The story culminates in a heart-stopping finale that leaves listeners questioning the boundaries between illusion and reality. In a masterful twist, we discover that the horror and deception are not limited to the stage but seep into the fabric of Harry's reality, blurring the lines of sanity and survival.“Memory of a Murder” is a compelling exploration of suspense, where every revelation turns the narrative more treacherous, and every character's motive is cast in shadow. The tale leaves us pondering the echoes of the past that haunt the present and the inevitable connections that lead to one chilling conclusion: the past is never truly buried.

EPISODE FORTY FOURCultivating a Growth Mindset in You and Your TeamSUMMARY In this episode of The Lonely Leader Podcast James Rule examines the concept of a growth mindset. He discusses what it is, its benefits, and how you can cultivate it within yourself and your team. Learn actionable strategies that promote a culture of continuous improvement and resilience.KEY TAKEAWAYSYou need to identify your fixed mindset triggers The leader must role model growth mindset behaviourA growth mindset embraces change and views challenges as opportunities for developmentCelebrate progress and small wins to motivate continued effort within your teamFostering a growth mindset involves creating an environment that values learning, collaboration, and resilienceABOUT THE HOST James is an experienced mentor, coach and thought leader who works with a range of clients from FTSE 100 companies, SME´s the NHS and wider public and not for profit sectors.His twenty year career in elite sport initially as a professional rugby player but predominantly as a chief executive has given him an invaluable insight in managing the success, failures and pressures associated with leadership at the highest level.As a high performance coach James specialises in enhancing resilience and leadership development. He is a passionate advocate of the notion that to find lasting fulfilment we need to take a holistic view of high performance and create it in both our professional roles and personal lives. EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT Episode 5 - The Two Biggest Frustrations Leaders are Facing Today Episode 12 - Eight Steps to Create a Quality Culture Episode 31 - Creating an Empowered MindsetCONNECT & CONTACT www.thelonelyleader.co.ukThe Lonely Leader's LinkedIn James' LinkedInInstagramhello@thelonelyleader.co.uk THIS SHOW WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY LONELY LEADER MEDIA NEWSLETTERSign Up to The Leadership Accelerator Newsletter for advice, inspiration and ideas, you'll also receive James' Top 10 Tips for Combating Your Fear of Public Speaking. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

EPISODE FORTYNavigating Leadership Transitions: How to lead confidently through change SUMMARY Transitions in leadership can feel overwhelming, but they also provide an opportunity for growth and development. In this episode of The Lonely Leader Podcast James discusses navigating leadership transitions with practical strategies to help you lead confidently and effectively. Whether you're stepping into a new role, managing a larger team, or joining a new organisation, this episode is packed with actionable advice for you to implement.KEY TAKEAWAYS:Embracing a Learning Mindset: It is crucial to adopt a learner's attitude in a new role. It enables you to gain clarity, it builds your credibility and enhances your leadership impact.Communicating a Clear Vision: You must establish and articulate a clear vision that aligns with your team's strengths. Ideally you have included plenty of their ideas and suggestions. Prioritising Relationship Building: Building and nurturing relationships must be a continual focus. When you establish trust and empower people then you significantly enhance your chances of successfully leading through change.ABOUT THE HOST James is an experienced mentor, coach and thought leader who works with a range of clients from FTSE 100 companies, SME´s the NHS and wider public and not for profit sectors.His twenty year career in elite sport initially as a professional rugby player but predominantly as a chief executive has given him an invaluable insight in managing the success, failures and pressures associated with leadership at the highest level.As a high performance coach James specialises in enhancing resilience and leadership development. He is a passionate advocate of the notion that to find lasting fulfilment we need to take a holistic view of high performance and create it in both our professional roles and personal lives. EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT Episode 38 - Mastering the Art of Communication Episode 17 - Five Key Steps to Lead Through Adversity Episode 12 - Eight Steps to Create a Quality Culture CONNECT & CONTACT www.thelonelyleader.co.ukThe Lonely Leader's LinkedIn James' LinkedInInstagramhello@thelonelyleader.co.uk THIS SHOW WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY LONELY LEADER MEDIA Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

D&D and RPG news and commentary by Mike Shea of https://slyflourish.com Contents 00:00 Show Start 01:13 Sly Flourish News: Mike Loses a Bet 02:59 D&D & RPG News: D&D 2024 and Free D&D on D&D Beyond 14:06 D&D & RPG News: Rich Lescoulflair Talking Phantasy Star RPG on Morrus's Podcast 15:42 D&D & RPG News: Matt Coleville on Eldritch Lorecast Talking About Project Sigil 19:35 D&D & RPG News: Free Hex Crawl Rules from Cursed Scroll 4 23:26 Product Spotlight: Broken Weave for 5e by Cubicle 7 36:24 DM Tip: Distance, Activity, and Attitude for Random Encounters 48:18 Patreon Question: Rewriting Published Adventures for Table Use 52:09 Patreon Question: Building Your Own Pantheon 55:38 Patreon Question: Using the Eight Steps for Published Adventures Links Subscribe to the Sly Flourish Newsletter Support Sly Flourish on Patreon Buy Sly Flourish Books: 2024 D&D Free Rules on D&D Beyond Rich Lescouflair on Phantasy Star RPG on Morrus's Podcast Matt Coleville on Eldritch Lorecast Free Hex Crawl Rules from Arcane Library Broken Weave for 5e Reaction Tables Across the Years Choosing the Right Steps from Return of the Lazy Dungeon Master

EPISODE THIRTY EIGHT Mastering The Art of CommunicationSUMMARYIn this episode of The Lonely Leader Podcast, James explores the vital role of effective communication in leadership. Discover six essential communication techniques that every leader should master to inspire and engage their teams. Learn about the importance of active listening, clarity and conciseness, constructive feedback, adaptability, empathy, and preparation. These strategies will enhance your communication skills and your impact as a leader.KEY TAKEAWAYSWhen communication is handled well it can enhance individual and team performance. When handled poorly it will destroy resilience in a team. As a leader you need to set the standard and demonstrate an ability to gather your thoughts and communicate them concisely. We must create a culture where feedback particularly constructive criticism is embraced as a mechanism for individual and collective improvement.Leaders must demonstrate empathy and build rapport otherwise their communication will never engage, inspire or motivate. ABOUT THE HOST James is an experienced mentor, coach and thought leader who works with a range of clients from FTSE 100 companies, SME´s the NHS and wider public and not for profit sectors.His twenty year career in elite sport initially as a professional rugby player but predominantly as a chief executive has given him an invaluable insight in managing the success, failures and pressures associated with leadership at the highest level.As a high performance coach James specialises in enhancing resilience and leadership development. He is a passionate advocate of the notion that to find lasting fulfilment we need to take a holistic view of high performance and create it in both our professional roles and personal lives. EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT Episode 35 - Leading a Hybrid TeamEpisode 22 - Creating Psychological Safety in a Team Episode 12 - Eight Steps to Create a Quality Culture CONNECT & CONTACT www.thelonelyleader.co.ukThe Lonely Leader's LinkedIn James' LinkedInInstagramhello@thelonelyleader.co.uk THIS SHOW WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY LONELY LEADER MEDIA Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Text Me ImmediatelyDoes anyone know of the band "Head of Femur"?  I don't know if they were ever considered "really" popular.  I had this one record of theirs...it was really good!  It had that song "Eight Steps to Jonas"?  I don't know.  I could probably just log-in to my preferred streaming service and do a search for them, but I gotta write the goddamn description for this podcast!!  You know, if I knew this is how it was all going to turn out I probably would've never pulled that rip cord.Support the Show.Go to hunchbunny.com to see all the hidden secrets!!!

to watch this episode, subscribe to my YouTube channel: optYOUmize podcast YoutubeSummaryHost Brett Ingram talks with Dr. Danny Brassell, a renowned author, speaker, and reading advocate. They delve into Dr. Brassell's inspiring journey from an inner-city teacher to a champion of reading and communication skills. Dr. Brassell shares effective strategies to cultivate a love for reading in children, underscores the importance of reading for personal and professional success, and offers tips for overcoming the fear of public speaking. The episode concludes with Dr. Brassell providing listeners with access to free resources to enhance their reading habits and communication skills.00:00 Introduction to Optimize Podcast00:08 Meet Dr. Danny Bursell02:22 The Importance of Reading04:52 Personal Stories and Teaching Experiences09:06 Strategies to Encourage Reading24:10 The Power of Communication Skills33:35 Memorable Oscar Speech by Joe Walker34:42 The Journey to Mastery: Practice Makes Perfect37:06 Overcoming the Fear of Public Speaking38:41 The Power of Consistency and Repetition39:21 Inspiring Stories of Triumph46:27 The Importance of Storytelling in Business50:29 The Impact of Reading on Success58:02 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsVisit http://freeGIFTfromDANNY.com for a free e-copy of Danny's book "Read, Lead & Succeed," which provides inspirational quotes & stories and adult- and children's-level book recommendations. You can also get access to a "5-day reading challenge" digital training for parents interested in helping their children read more, read better and love reading.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Optimize Podcast00:08 Meet Simon Severino: Sales Expert01:09 Simon's Journey to Sales Mastery05:27 Common Sales Mistakes and How to Avoid Them11:46 Handling Objections in Sales13:38 Maintaining a Positive Sales Mindset17:49 The Eight Steps to Repeatable Sales19:27 The Strategy Sprints Method21:37 Client Success Stories25:51 Personal Insights and Final Tips28:43 Conclusion and Wrap-UpVisit http://freeGIFTfromDANNY.com for a free e-copy of Danny's book "Read, Lead & Succeed," which provides inspirational quotes & stories and adult- and children's-level book recommendations. You can also get access to a "5-day reading challenge" digital training for parents interested in helping their children read more, read better and love reading.#reading #readtosucceed #podmatch #solopreneur #successmindset #successhabits #believeinyourself #businesslessons #entrepreneur #worklifebalance #successhabits #digitalbusiness #personaldevelopment #successhacks #businesslessons #lifelessons #success #entrepreneurslife #entrepreneurialmindset #entrepreneurtips #entrepreneurmind #entrepreneurmotivation #optyoumize #brettingram #digitalmarketing #onlinemarketing #digitalmarketer #entrepreneurpodcast

to watch this episode, subscribe to my YouTube channel: optYOUmize podcast YoutubeSummaryHost Brett Ingram talks with Simon Severino, acclaimed author of 'Strategy Sprints', CEO of Strategy Sprints, TEDx speaker, podcast host, Forbes contributor, and triathlete. They discuss the complexities of entrepreneurship, specifically focusing on effective sales growth strategies and systems. Simon shares his journey to mastering sales, emphasizing the importance of immersion and resilience. The discussion covers critical sales techniques such as establishing an agenda, crafting a sales playbook, and avoiding premature pricing. Moreover, Simon explores the significance of mindset, teamwork, and support structures in sales. Brett and Simon dissect key sales challenges like objections and the nuances of driving higher sales in commoditized industries. Finally, they delve into the 'Eight Steps to Repeatable Sales' framework and the concept of a '90-Day Strategy Sprint' to boost revenue. The episode is packed with valuable insights aimed at helping entrepreneurs achieve their business and personal life goals.Visit https://strategysprints.com to get Simon's free newsletter that helps you become a better leader, learn how to become a certified strategy coach, and learn all about how Simon can help you grow your sales.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Optimize Podcast00:08 Meet Simon Severino: Sales Expert01:09 Simon's Journey to Sales Mastery05:27 Common Sales Mistakes and How to Avoid Them11:46 Handling Objections in Sales13:38 Maintaining a Positive Sales Mindset17:49 The Eight Steps to Repeatable Sales19:27 The Strategy Sprints Method21:37 Client Success Stories25:51 Personal Insights and Final Tips28:43 Conclusion and Wrap-UpVisit https://strategysprints.com to get Simon's free newsletter that helps you become a better leader, learn how to become a certified strategy coach, and learn all about how Simon can help you grow your sales.#salesgrowth #growsales #salesstrategies #podmatch #solopreneur #successmindset #successhabits #believeinyourself #businesslessons #entrepreneur #worklifebalance #successhabits #digitalbusiness #personaldevelopment #successhacks #businesslessons #lifelessons #success #entrepreneurslife #entrepreneurialmindset #entrepreneurtips #entrepreneurmind #entrepreneurmotivation #optyoumize #brettingram #digitalmarketing #onlinemarketing #digitalmarketer #entrepreneurpodcast

2 + Hours of Crime on a TuesdayFirst a look at this day in History.Then Gang Busters, originally broadcast June 4, 1949, 75 years ago,  The Case of the Date with Death.  A petty crook who holds up taxi drivers ends up killing a cop.  Followed by Boston Blackie starring Dick Kollmar, originally broadcast June 4, 1946, 78 years ago, Three Witnesses. Three people each have a motive for killing Tom Marshall, an old man, even though he seems to have died a natural death. Then three people are killed within 5 hours...with the same knife!Then the news from 78 years ago, then Inner Sanctum Mysteries, originally broadcast June 4, 1946,  78 years ago, Eight Steps to Murder starring Berry Kroeger. A newsman plans to murder a Broadway producer and marry the man's wife. Followed by Calling All Cars, originally broadcast June 4, 1935, 89 years ago, The Innocent Bride.  A bank has been held up in Long Beach. A Russian immigrant proposes marriage and spends lavishly. Finally Superman, originally broadcast June 4, 1941, 83 years ago, Mr Deutch and the Radium Mine.   Clark Kent discovers Jimmy Olsen in his cell on Volcano Island. Thanks to Richard for supporting our podcast by using the Buy Me a Coffee function at http://classicradio.streamCivil defense info mentioned on the show can be found here: http://www.civildefensemuseum.com/docs.html

Get full-length pulp audiobooks, pulp eBooks, and old-time radio shows ABSOLUTELY FREE FOR IMMEDIATE DOWNLOAD by emailing WeirdDarkness@RadioArchives.com!A creaking door and a chorus of haunting organ music. No radio show opening is more memorable for many fans than the one heard on Inner Sanctum Mysteries. This disturbing simple salvo led people into thirty minutes of suspense and horror sprinkled with puns from a creepy host, all of which can now be heard again in sparkling audio quality from Radio Archives.Inner Sanctum Mysteries was the brainchild of producer Himan Brown, inspired by the unsettling creaking door in the basement of a studio where he once worked. Brown took that inspiration and built around it a formula that lived on beyond the show itself. Listeners tuned in every week to hear that door open and be welcomed by the sinister, yet often humorous host to join him in a chair near the fire inside the Inner Sanctum for a story sure to chill them to the bone.Stories on Inner Sanctum Mysteries originally included both classic and original tales, the new stories taking center stage as the show continued. With writers like pulp scribes Emile Tepperman and Robert Newman, as well as Robert Sloan, Milton Lewis, and others, it is little surprise that Inner Sanctum is still beloved by fans today. Utilizing numerous clichés and literary devices, Inner Sanctum Mysteries carried listeners into the heart of horror, a liberal dose of camp often thrown in. Using voices ranging from star Boris Karloff to a veteran crew of New York radio actors, Inner Sanctum set the standard for horror programs both on radio and even inspired decades of horror hosts on television.Inner Sanctum Mysteries features some of the best of fright, terror, and fantastic storytelling old time radio has to offer!00:00:00.000 = INTRODUCTION00:01:54.794 = Make Ready My Grave (April 23, 1946)00:31:33.732 = You Could Die Laughing (May 07, 1946)01:01:14.626 = Detour to Terror (May 21, 1946)01:30:48.100 = Eight Steps to Murder (June 04, 1946)02:00:25.568 = I Want To Report a Murder (June 18, 1046)02:30:03.844 = Murder Comes at Midnight (August 09, 1946) – LOW QUALITY02:55:14.815 = Dead Laugh (September 23, 1946) – LOW QUALITY03:21:08.827 = No Rest For The Dead (November 25, 1946)03:48:30.221 = Death Bound (February 03, 1947)04:18:17.845 = Terror By Night (May 19, 1947)SOURCES AND ESSENTIAL WEB LINKS…This episode is sponsored by http://RadioArchives.comWeird Darkness Retro Radio theme by Storyblocks.= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = ="I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness." — John 12:46Find out how to escape eternal darkness at https://weirddarkness.com/eternaldarknessWeirdDarkness® - is a registered trademark. Copyright, Weird Darkness, 2024.= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =CUSTOM WEBPAGE: https://weirddarkness.com/innersanctum-marathon-009

In today's episode, we explore the art of crafting your fitness empire through the power of signature offers. We'll dissect what a signature offer entails, its significance in standing out, and how it can transform your fitness business. From niche targeting to pricing strategies, we're unpacking eight crucial steps to building a compelling, client-attracting fitness brand. Whether you're a seasoned trainer or just starting, this conversation is your blueprint for success. Let's dive in and unlock the potential of your fitness empire!Timeline Summary:[00:00:25] Signature Offer Defined - Your Unique IP[00:01:43] Niching Down Attracts Ideal Clients[00:03:12] Signature Offers Amplify Attraction[00:08:20] Uniqueness Draws Right Clients[00:10:58] Value-Based Pricing EncouragedKey Takeaways:Signature Offers as Unique Selling Propositions: It's emphasized as a crucial strategy for standing out and not competing on price alone.The Importance of Niching Down: Niching down is presented as a starting point for developing a signature offer that resonates with a specific audience.Examples and Success Stories: The conversation includes references to successful signature offers in the fitness industry, like Joe Wicks' programs, to illustrate the concept's potential for scalability and client attraction.Eight Steps to Crafting a Signature Offer: This includes getting clear on your vision, aligning with your dream client's transformation, designing your signature system, honing in on your uniqueness, pricing based on value, creating an authentic marketing plan, delivering exceptional customer experience, and implementing systems and technology.Uniqueness and Personality in Business: Being genuine and treating clients well are underscored as key to success.Value-Based Pricing: There's a strong encouragement to price services based on value rather than undercutting. This is tied to the perceived value of the transformation offered to clients.Websites and Links Mentioned:Strength MattersFree Strategy CallQuotes:"It's your IP, your intellectual property...a way of establishing our expertise in the industry."​​ - Andrew Wallis "If we can package and create our own signature offer...people want that product, that signature offer."​​ - Andrew Wallis "Align with dream client transformation...make sure that you have your best clients in mind and craft it for them."​​ - Andrew Wallis"Design the signature system and content strategy...map out the journey from starting point to endpoint."​​ - Andrew Wallis"Hone in on your uniqueness...be yourself, showcase your personality that will shine through and attract the right types of clients."​​ - Andrew WallisShow Your Support: Rate and Review Us!If you enjoyed today's episode, please consider giving us a 5-star rating and a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts. Your support helps us reach more people and bring you even more quality content. Click the link below to rate and review us now! Rate and Review us on Apple Podcasts FREE DownloadsTo learn more about Strength Matters and our high-performance training system, download your FREE copy of The Strength Matters System of Athletic Development. Get it at - www.strengthmatters.com/system

As we head into the New Year, many of us have self-improvement plans for 2024. But what if what you really need is a little time for self-reflection? Join us as today's guest, “A Million Little Things” and “The Devil Wears Prada” actor Stephanie Szostak, shares the eight self-reflection exercises she created in her new playbook. Listen in to learn more about yourself, which can lead to increased confidence, joy, and meaning. “What do you say to yourself about your story? You know, what? I'm really unlucky. I'm really. What do you repeat in your head about who you are? What's your self-talk? What does your self-talk sound like? We are the authors of our own stories. And if we rewrite the way we talk to ourselves or the story we tell ourselves about our reality, we can really change our reality.” ~Stephanie Szostak To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page. Our guest, Stephanie Szostak is an actress and Give an Hour Ambassador who speaks on overcoming failure, being an outsider, and living with authenticity. Szostak left her native France to study business and play varsity golf at the College of William & Mary. At twenty-nine years old, after a brief stint at Chanel in New York City, she took a leap and gave the acting world a try. Her most notable projects include “The Devil Wears Prada,” “Iron Man 3,” “Dinner for Schmucks,” and the ABC hit series “A Million Little Things.” Ten years into her career, she suffered from crippling imposter syndrome which pushed her to address her mindset and develop her own Playbook as a daily practice of mental fitness. She hopes your Self!sh Playbook will support your journey of discovery, learning, and growth. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. Gabe makes his home in the suburbs of Columbus, Ohio. He lives with his supportive wife, Kendall, and a Miniature Schnauzer dog that he never wanted, but now can't imagine life without. To book Gabe for your next event or learn more about him, please visit gabehoward.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's insightful episode of the Dad Tired podcast, host Chris Hilken takes listeners through his unique eight-step process for disciplining children with wisdom and love. Drawing from his personal life experiences, including the loss of his wife and the challenges of blending a family, Chris discusses the importance of balancing grace and truth in parenting. He emphasizes the need for a structured yet compassionate approach to discipline, especially in moments of frustration and anger. Throughout the episode, Chris breaks down each step of his process, from ensuring calmness and setting clear expectations to diagnosing the degree of disobedience and executing appropriate discipline. This episode is more than just a guide; it's a journey into understanding the heart behind discipline and how to apply it in a way that fosters respect, learning, and love within the family. Whether you're struggling with discipline or looking for a more effective strategy, Chris's eight steps offer a practical and thoughtful roadmap for any dad aiming to navigate the complexities of parenting with grace and authority.

Welcome back! Chris and Melissa here, and last week, Melissa shared a post on Instagram about the eight things we did to rebuild our marriage after being separated. We often get asked, "How did you go from the brink of divorce to creating such a beautiful marriage?" And while it's not perfect (because no marriage is), we've learned a lot along the way. Sometimes, people are just curious about our journey. Other times, they're seeking tools and resources to improve their own relationships. We've always given bits and pieces of advice when asked, but consolidating our experiences into one post was something new. And the response? Overwhelming. It was saved hundreds of times, and even some marriage therapists we admire reshared it, validating our journey and the principles we believe can apply to any marriage. So we thought we would share with our podcast fam!  Whether you're feeling hopeless in your marriage, think it's just "okay," or believe it's fantastic but can always be better, these eight steps can make a difference. The first and most crucial step was both of us making a conscious decision to fight for our marriage. It sounds simple, but there's a difference between deciding to do something and truly committing to it. We had to move from just being in the marriage to actively choosing it every day. One profound realization was understanding that neither of us was "stuck" in the marriage. Recognizing that we both had agency in our relationship was empowering. It shifted our mindset from feeling trapped to realizing that we had a say in how our story would unfold. Another significant step was taking 100% responsibility for our marriage's success. Instead of keeping score or waiting for the other to change, we focused on what we could control: our actions, our reactions, and our mindset. We realized that true happiness couldn't be contingent on the other person's behavior. Entrusting someone else with your happiness is not only unwise but also an unfair burden to place on them. We had to learn to be responsible for our own happiness. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking, "If only they did X, Y, or Z, then I'd be happy." But that's a dangerous game. Instead, we learned that the most impactful thing we could do was to focus on being the best versions of ourselves. In essence, our journey wasn't linear. There were highs and lows, progress and setbacks. But with each step, we grew stronger together, learning more about ourselves and each other. And we're excited to share these insights with you, hoping they can help you in your own relationships. Hit play, and join us and find out The Eight Steps to a Beautiful Marriage!    LINKS: Website: familybrand.com Social: Instagram: www.instagram.com/ourfamilybrand Facebook: www.facebook.com/FamilyBrandOfficial YouTube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCGu-7odB6gkPbyXpUIQLkrg Twitter: https://twitter.com/OurFamilyBrand   NEW: What Culture are You Creating In Your Family? Take the Quiz Now! https://familybrand.com/quiz   Episode Minute By Minute: 00:44 Intro to today's episode on the 8 things Chris and Melissa did to rebuild their marriage 03:28 Making a conscious decision together to fight for your marriage  05:18 Rebuilding a marriage takes time and it's pushing through setbacks  07:47 Chris and Melissa talk about each person taking 100% responsibility  13:10 Chris dives into personal development vs trying to fix others around you  14:39 Melissa talks about trying to work on your spouse rather than working on yourself  19:32 The importance of marriage counseling and finding the right one for you  22:56 Melissa talks about staying away from people who want your marriage to fail 24:30 Chris and Melissa talk about being committed to weekly date nights  28:52 Breakdown of great date night ideas  30:52 How to focus more on the things that you do have rather than the things you don't have  34:00 Finding happiness again and believing that your marriage will work again