Smack My Pitch Up

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 97 - Mad Max: Kronk's New Dystopia Transcript at the bottom of show notes Hobbit and Thandi strap in for a diesel-fueled ride through remakes and remixed of Mad Max! Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" "Forever Believe" "Bustin Loose" and "Hi Fi Brutality" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries TRANSCRIPT: Hobbit: [00:00:00] Hello? Hello. Hello Geeks. Welcome to another episode of smack my pitch up, the podcast that reboots remakes, reimagines sequels side-quels and adapts some of your favorite and least favorite properties from film, television and what have you. And we've got a banger here on this episode for sure, and with me to discuss the remakes and reimaginings, my co-host Thandi. Good day. I thought about doing like an accent, I think, for the betterment of everyone involved. I'm not gonna try to do that. I've never been able to nail either the British or the Australian accent cause they bleeding to each other. Thandi: Yeah. You know, what's fun about doing an accent? For me specifically I'll lose it. I'll lose it almost immediately, and it will turn into whatever it'll turn into like something racist by the end of whatever impression I'm doing, Hobbit: It could be the whitest act. I can do like a Russian accent very poorly, where you're almost offended. I don't think I have Russian background, but like I'm white enough where it's like, no, he can he's allowed to do Russian accent. No. [00:01:00] It's almost offensive. So Thandi: You don't wanna get smacked by Putin. Nobody wants to get smacked by Putin. So Hobbit: get clobbered by his giant horse. Yeah. Let's avoid that if possible. Thandi: eat you with my pick. Yeah. Hobbit: So today we are talking about, Cult Classic for sure. A movie that has spawned to multiple sequels as well as a remake that's not really a remake, so much as a kinda re, re-engagement, a re-envisioning of yeah. Thandi: Yeah it's like, old Mad Max is, what do they call the Star Wars stuff that was made before the reboot, Hobbit: Oh, those are, Thandi: The Star Wars legends or whatever, all the novels and stuff. Yeah. Old Mad Max is Mad Max Legends and . This is like, you know, the new kids. This is, even though it's the same character, it's Hobbit: And what we are talking about is Mad Max the first Mad Max movie and the universe in general. I, guess, But the thing that's interesting about that though is starting with Fury Road, if they are going with Tom Hardy as, max from now on, if they're [00:02:00] restarting this universe it is interesting where they're starting as far as the distance away from Doomsday. Like every Mad Max movie gets a little bit further away from the fall of society. Thandi: Yeah, little. Road is like hundreds of years after, like Max is a Highlander or something Hobbit: Right. Thandi: by the time of Hobbit: And the the original director, he said that Max is really more there to be Way into a slice of life of that world at that time, you know, that Max does assist with stuff happening. But for the most part it's, we're just following him around on his adventures to see where the world is at this point in the decay. And it was interesting to revisit Mad Max after it's been years. I haven't seen it since Fury Road came out, I think. Thandi: I'd only ever seen it on tv. After watching this, I realized I'd only ever seen it as a TV edit. and it's a whole different experience. This is some good [00:03:00] schlock. I was actually surprised. It's really Hobbit: holds up well and you try to explain what happens and there's three important things that happen and that's it in like 90 minutes, but it's engaging the whole time. There's never a point where I felt bored watching this, movie. Thandi: It's interesting. It's not too long, although I did feel like it dragged a little bit somewhere in the middle. It's not too long. It has some really intriguing aesthetic choices. The score is late fifties, early sixties style the orchestration, which is interesting. There's some interesting camera stuff going on. It's very surprising that this is uh, George Miller's first major movie. Hobbit: And I feel like the acting is not top-notch, but it does feel natural enough that it's even the bad actors are not that cringey. It doesn't come off poorly, I Thandi: I like some like, goose. I thought Goose Hobbit: Goose is great. Thandi: Max is actually a little bit too young. That was, my complaint. Mel Gibson is a little bit young for the Hobbit: I was mindful and made sure that I didn't go too old with Max [00:04:00] with my casting, but I did. Yeah. He is so much younger than everybody else really in the film. He looks like a baby and maybe it's just cuz we know Mel Gibson to be this like old racist dude. And this is like young racist dude, but. Thandi: This is even before big hair, incredible wings. Mel Gibson. This is, A whole different Hobbit: was looking at actors in their like early twenties, and I just, I couldn't I just, the concept of them driving a car, I'm like, you're not old enough to drive a car. You can't, Thandi: You got the cutest little baby face Hobbit: is something that I really like about Mad Max, is that there is a portrayal of a revenge film, very Western. It's completely, if you take all the beats of this movie and remove the cars and put in horses it's, and it's not the apocalypse, it's just the old West. This is a fucking Western movie. But it doesn't try to overdo the chase scenes. The chase scenes are pretty straight up. Like they're on straightaways. They're not doing all these crazy twists and turns. And max isn't this big buff fucker, he's this normal [00:05:00] sized person that he fights a little, but mostly it's just him running people over with his car. That's the majority of his skillset is just Thandi: Killing people with this Hobbit: yeah, it's, so what I liked about that is , I didn't need to cast some like action hero type necessarily for the role of. Thandi: This was pre that type anyway. They were on the, just the cusp of having leads take over in that fashion. But this is what, it's like 79, Hobbit: believe in late seventies. Yeah. Thandi: Yeah. So this is right before they start putting Adonis Godman as the other action leads. Hobbit: What a weird time. Yeah, it was the eighties pretty much all the way through until right at the end of the 80. when you had the, like Bruce Willis's and the Joe Everyman that came in and picked that back up again, but there was this like 10 year block that was just big old machismo men that ruled the world. Thandi: Yep. And then after that it was, they were all Brad Pitt types wiry, mu wiry dudes that I still resent Hobbit: of course. Oh man, there was a weird time in [00:06:00] my high school years that scrawny hairless men was the in vogue. , and that's literally the opposite of me. if you Thandi: Damn you, Moby moby Hobbit: right. It was all the lanky, fucking scrawny dudes that everybody was losing their shit over had no armpit hair, nothing. Here I am looking like a fucking lumberjack, a short little, wide lumberjack. Thandi: Yes, and both you and the scrawny, lanky dude are both looking at Mel Gibson going, Hobbit: Yeah. Pretty much. Now how the tides have turned that bearded men is now in vogue and yay. Thandi: We rule the day until Hobbit: until we go to bed at a very reasonable hour. Okay. So Mad Max, there's a lot of room to work here. I'm interested to see if either of us, decided to stick to the timeline of the post apocalypse or the dystopian world. Of the original Mad Max or took it a little bit further into the post apocalypse. Also, is this an apocalypse movie? Is this done differently? [00:07:00] I'm really interested. You have the wild one always excites me cuz you will go out there this might be in space, I don't know. So I'm. Thandi: No, the take this time is gonna be something where you're like, what? What are you doing? You know, last time you were like, wow, that is really cool. The time before you, that is fun. This one's gonna be like, yeah, Hobbit: Why Great. Mine, I feel, is a pretty straight ahead version here that I think you're gonna understand why I made the choices that I did. This is the straight up remake, reimagining what have you. I decided that the real difference here is that I didn't want to try to capture that like Aussie. Dystopian vibe. I wanted to look at what Man Max would be if it was an American director, directing American actors with an American aesthetic, but not necessarily the fast and the furious kind of aesthetic. Definitely balls to the wall a little bit. That's just, that's definitely America, but more that, action kind of [00:08:00] comedy, the die hards of it, the fun action vibe a little. With just a touch of demented to get, let it go down smoother. And I decided that Brian Taylor would be my director for that kind of journey. If you're unfamiliar. He is one of the directors of Crank one and two. He directed gamer Ghost writer Spirit of Vengeance. More recently he did the movie Mom and Dad with Nicholas Cage, which is an absolute fucking blast If you haven't seen. Thandi: I have not Hobbit: It's like an infection movie where all the parents are infected and get like homicidal and wanna murder their own children. That's what the virus does. Yeah. Basically. So it's just all these parents being like, come here honey. Stab stab. And there was a series on sci-fi that he that helps create and also directed called Happy. That was a tour de force of demented weird fantasy the main character. Chris Maloney. He has an imaginary friend that's like a flying unicorn that's voiced by Pat [00:09:00] Oswalt. It's a weird show, but definitely steeped in gross, weird demented comedy. And so that's energy that I wanted to bring to this is just a little over the top, a little bonkers but still that intensity you want from an action. And so I, for Max, that was a tough choice for me. I wanted to do a not action hero kind of person, but somebody that could get unhinged , if they really got to that point they would break bad when it got to that. And from his portrayal in mayhem this horror movie, I thought Stephen Yune would be an interesting choice for. Thandi: Oh, nice. I almost cast him in a different role, yeah. Steven. Deserves a breakout role in like a young person's breakout role like that. I know he's going for serious stuff, but Hobbit: He's definitely proven himself to be a tremendous actor. But I've also been playing this dude that gets basically infected and becomes like a raw [00:10:00] nerve of aggression in mayhem. He, it's a very fun ride that he takes you on and he's gets to play it super big and you can tell he is having a fun time with it. And so I want to be able to have that spectrum from the actor playing Max is somebody that can go subtle and quiet cuz Mel Gibson is quiet in the first man Max. He doesn't say a lot at all. So I want that to just go up to 11 when he's on his revenge. That he's what? Just freaking out and going Bonkers. So, Steven Yeun. I think it would be fun in that role for Jesse, his partner, his wife, his, the mother of his child. I wanted an actress that could play like she's got her own shit together. She's not like the damsel and distress type, but is also very funny and can play at these big action sequences and be the comic relief of the moment in some of the most like, darkest moments of this. And I just saw her recently in a really bad movie called Shotgun Wedding. The movie's fucking awful. It's the Jennifer Lopez vehicle that came out on Prime, and it's stupid. I [00:11:00] hate Thandi: Yeah, Sandra started watching that the other day, and I don't Hobbit: Yeah, it's really bad. But Darcy Carden is in it and I love her. She was in the Good place as Janet. She plays Natalie in Barry and she was also in shotgun wedding, but she's a comedic actress. She's been around and she's been in tons of. Very funny. There's something about her that's so, so just like hits me the right way. Very funny actress and has the, I'm one step ahead of you, kind of energy with her humor as well. She knows what you're gonna say and she's got five clips ready to go already. So I thought they would be a fun matchup. Jim Goose. Goose. I wanted somebody that would be like the kind of wide open, wants to be a ladies man, just fun, weird, sidekick character and a little older as well. Christopher Maloney, he's already worked with the director. I think he would've a lot of fun just being like the zany, the, sidekick, or not sidekick, but coworker, Thandi: oh, definitely. And Maloney's. Hobbit: Maloney is a fucking trip. He is such a [00:12:00] trip. Initially I had cast him as Fifi, the basic, their boss, basically. Cuz I thought Maloney would have a lot of fun just walking around shirtless, smoking a cigar and yelling at people. And he would, but I think his energies would be better spent as Jim Goose. For Fifi, I decided that role, I wanted somebody built like the. He looked like a Russian weightlifter that lifted the triangular weights only the their boss, Fifi. So I needed a buff guy that was gonna be able to have fun in this role as this really happy, big energy person. So Terry Cruz immediately jumped out as a good choice there. He Thandi: course. Hobbit: just really friendly, nice boss that people actually like, but also don't fuck with him. I could, Terry Cruz works perfectly for that. Thandi: Yeah. No, Terry Cruz is great as the big Hobbit: Yeah, that's, his whole career is pretty much playing that role for the most part except for Brooklyn nine nine. He doesn't play the big guy, quote unquote necessarily in that role. Thandi: He plays this sweet, cool-headed guy who [00:13:00] loves his family. Hobbit: I feel like Terry Cruz would be a great person to spend time with, not even get a drink with, but like, Just your friend from years ago that you go to like the park with your kids together kind of energy. He, this is a sweetheart Thandi: Who keeps trying to get you to go to the gym with him and you're like, oh Hobbit: suit? Yep. 100%. Oh, your CrossFit friend. That's Terry Cruz. Oh no. I, for the use of bad guys now that we're going with and I wanted to cast a kind of quiet intensity for Bubba Zt. And so I went with Tommy Flanagan, if you're unfamiliar he's the Irish actor with a giant gash scar in his face that was in Sons of Anarchy. He was in Sin City. He's been in Braveheart and Gladiator. Thandi: I believe I know who you're talking about, Hobbit: very well known as a, always the grizzled, tough guy and uh, toe cutter. Unhinged, boss of the biker gang. We gotta get Nicholas Cage in there at some point.[00:14:00] He's had a couple movies with Brian Taylor. He had Ghost Rider and also mom and dad, so they know how to work together. Nicholas Cage could definitely have room to do whatever Nicholas Cage wants with this role. Thandi: I'm kinda surprised that Nick Cage didn't come to mind for me for what I was, what I'm doing. That's, yeah, cuz he is a great choice for that. Hobbit: I think just giving him moments to do whatever would really make this movie. And then finally, Johnny the Boy, the drugged out fucking weirdo guy that gets in trouble and gets arrested and then gets released is the little brother character to the biker gang that always fucks up and they're always really annoyed with him. Pete Davidson. For Johnny The Boy. Yeah, that's perfect. But with this casting and Brian Taylor in this demented action comedy kind of vibe, the world that I'm setting up in the States is that basically resources are dwindled dramatically. and the coasts are really where most everybody lives because you can get to stuff easier that way through the ocean and railway systems and stuff. The [00:15:00] middle of America is basically ghosted. A lot of the crops have died at this point. resources are dwindling dramatically cuz of global warming or whatever you, whatever. It's not necessary to explain, but there's just barren wastes of just flat, dusty dust bowl . And so really the only people that exist in this area have cars, have souped up rods and cars that have extra gas tanks attached to them, randomly and basically Mad Max vehicles that they have to build out to make these long hauls in between small towns that are still existing in the Midwest. And because that also, there's not enough police force to cover these great expanses and so there's the highway patrol basically that has these. That they can get from town to town on like less gas, but still like gun it. You know, they have little bit better technology but they can only get around so much. So they're constantly on the tail of all these highway gangs. They are constantly trying to make sure all the small towns are okay, but the small towns, [00:16:00] they have their sheriffs and their people in charge, but they can only do so much when a gang of like 30 or 40 bikers comes into town. So, they've been after this gang for a while. They've been trying to prevent them from stealing the resources from the towns in their sector. And so that's how they come to know Max from him just being the best cop in their region, trying to protect these towns. So Max is there basically out of his ability to drive really well, but also he gets better resources by being friendly with all these towns that have resources. And they thank him by giving him water and gas and clothes and stuff for his car. As a bribe basically, hey, pay more attention to us than the other towns. And so when the bikers start cutting into his cut by. By stealing resources from these towns and you know, him not getting there in time, then that's what's really pissing him off. You know, that's what's really motivating him [00:17:00] is like, Hey, you're cutting into my stuff here. So it's less about the world fully falling apart. The cities are still, industrialized and still working and functioning. Though poorly, a little bit dystopian, but the middle America looks like the post apocalypse just because everybody's escaped. Pretty much everybody's gone to the coasts. There's nothing really left in middle America anymore for anybody. the crops have died, like the resources have dwindled, Thandi: Yeah. Yeah. And taking it to America is probably a better move anyway, like maybe not explicitly so. But I feel like there's enough regional culture in the Mad Max movies that doing something that you're a little bit more familiar with might be a better. Hobbit: And it being set in Australia was because that's, George Miller lived , like, so it doesn't have to be Australia necessarily. There's nothing Australia centric [00:18:00] about this story really. Thandi: Except for all the the Fosters billboards in the Hobbit: Right. Australian for post apocalypse. So yeah that's my take. Middle America centered mad Max movie with. Yuck. Yucks and action. And explosions and craziness. Thandi: I'd watch it. And it's . It's about time to bring back the the aesthetic. Like of course we had Fury Road as George Miller's modern vision of that, but A world of post-apocalyptic leather daddies that populated that Mad Max era . It's time to bring that back. I'd love to Hobbit: And I, there's only so much further you can go in the post-apocalyptic world of Mad Max after Fury Road, because then it's just dust. There's nothing there's barely anything left in Fury Road. Resetting it and bringing it back to where there's ghost towns, they're driving through these ghost towns and there's small populations of people and there's still some level of government, working, giving resources. [00:19:00] Highway patrolman, basically. And, the best way I can explain it is it's when shit's done, there's no going back. The society is collapsing as they speak. Everybody knows it, everybody's aware of it. Everybody knows they got maybe 10 years tops before even the police are gone. That it's that level, but nobody's willing to admit it. It's like when in 2008 when I worked at Blockbuster, everybody knew that Blockbuster was going under, every couple of months another store would go out of business. But we all just pretended that somehow there'd be like a turn that we'd be fine at some point and we just of went about our business until, you know, the store went under. Thandi: Red box is bs. Nobody's gonna use a Hobbit: We just gotta Thandi: box. Netflix, Hobbit: in there just a little bit longer until this fad blows over. So that's this world of Mad Max is people out of not having other options, barely hanging on, hoping that something changes Thandi: Yeah, not knowing that the world is going to descend to the place where the only three assets left [00:20:00] are bullets, gasoline and titty milk. Hobbit: That sounds like a good weekend right there, Thandi: maybe Hobbit: Yeah. Yeah. Thandi: Ah, I did something interesting with my take, I guess, So my take is basically based on me diving down a rabbit hole, mad Max influenced a bunch of like 1980s anime, like just Mel Gibson in general influenced a bunch of 1980s anime, but basically it influenced it so much that like anime style, mad Max has already been. Many times over. So going down that rabbit hole, I was like we're doing a big budget movie for an American audience. What's big budget? American animation. There's Disney and there's Dreamworks. So basically my Mad Max is an animated movie from Dreamworks, Hobbit: Okay. Thandi: Cars via Dreamworks. [00:21:00] And it's It's basically a bunch of chases that climax in the big race for it all or whatever kids movie. No, I take that back. All a family movie, so everybody gets to be Hobbit: So there's some winks to murdering a wife and child and stuff, but not like overtly to. Thandi: It's, yeah. There'll be violence, but it's like violence that you never see. Like people can die in a cartoon movie. You just can't see the body hit the floor. So, my Mad Max Dreamworks movie takes place in Arizona. Max Rocke Tansky is the best pursuit cop on this stretch of of highway in, in Arizona. And he is got a big head about it and it's about him finding his way to appreciate the love of friends and family and working as a team, you know, kid movie stuff. But for everybody. Max Roski, Chris Pratt. Why Chris Pratt? Because Chris Pratt is the universal voice actor for everything right [00:22:00] now. So my Max Roski is Chris Pratt. He will not be doing a gruff anything. He'll just be doing Chris Pratt like he does anyway, except when he is playing when he did that movie for Amazon. Hobbit: Oh, the tomorrow war. Thandi: goose. Yeah, my goose. I just needed a side kick. Character. Who's the best sidekick in the history of man and who's also like a really interesting voice. John C. Reilly Hobbit: I knew you were gonna say John C. Reilly. knew it when you said sidekick. Yeah. Thandi: Yeah he's the sidekick John C. Reilly in, in this take goose still dies, but you don't see him burned to to. Where Max is like, what Hobbit: Where Max does the Ooh Thandi: goosey Hobbit: face as he pulls the sheet up, Thandi: Oh, it's so early days for his acting. It's fine. It's fine. Jesse Roski, the wife is still his wife in this movie, but she's also on the highway patrol. She's part of the [00:23:00] action. Their conflict comes into the fact that he wants to be a lone wolf and she wants to teach him how to work better with the team. Kristen Bell is Jesse Ros Hobbit: Okay. I see it Thandi: cuz she could be sweet and convincing Hobbit: a little agro when need be. Thandi: Yeah. Roski Ski is no longer a child. Sprague Rockat. Tansky is a talking. And the actual direct partner of Max Rock Osky, doing the ride alongs and pointing down the suspects and saying, Hey man, cuz it's Kevin Hart. Is Sprague Rock. Hobbit: Oh, no. Like talk, like I. That's racist. I don't know how it's racist, but it's racist. I think there's no way to portray Kevin Hart playing that character without it coming off kind of racist. Thandi: As Sprague Rock Osky. He can't be like Brian, the dog for Max Rock Atki without [00:24:00] being Hobbit: You you know how they would play Kevin Hart in that role though. That's the thing. There's only Thandi: Yeah. But that's actually Kevin Hart. That's how Kevin Hobbit: I'm Thandi: Kevin Hart. That's on him. Me too. That's what makes it great. The tow tremor, so the Hobbit: The tow trimmer. Thandi: Yeah. The Hobbit: no. That's brilliant. But God damn it Thandi: is Keefer Sutherland cuz he is got the ultimate like, hard ass, bad guy voice the cold. Wonderful for a kids' movie, perfect villain Hobbit: If you haven't seen the movie Freeway with uh, Keer Sutherland. He plays like the big bad wolf type character of like a serial killing like dude. And he does this kind of like voice. I can picture that being the perfect touchpoint for him to play this role. Like of the kind of growly. Thandi: Or his take on a solid Hobbit: Yes. Thandi: cuz he was, he replaced David Hader on that game that people were like, oh, it's not David Hader. Zunti, his his second in [00:25:00] command is, No longer a person. That's a dog too. But that dog can talk. And that talking dog is Patrick Warburton. Is Zanetti in this Hobbit: So Kronk's new, dystopia uh, okay. Thandi: Yeah, he's the henchman. He's henchman number one. Henchman number two, Kini. The guy who loses his hand. And yeah. That's James Fran. So James Franco is is guy number three, the police captain or whatever of the station house. The boss is Brian Cox Hobbit: always a good Thandi: and they're all just, yeah, they're all just trying to reign Max in Goose dies, wife lives tow trimmer. Ends by not getting hit by a truck, but by driving off of a cliff Disney style. So he dies. You don't see the death, but characters falling off a cliff is like animated kids movie tradition. Uh, That's how he does Hobbit: noise as Yeah.[00:26:00] Thandi: and like a, just a sickening splat. Yeah. That is my version of of Mad Max. Hobbit: choices were made But it does beg the question, like, why aren't there more post-apocalyptic cartoons that really, I feel like cars kind of could be perceived that way. And then there's Wally, and then that's it. Like that's pretty Thandi: You get something like, I don't know I don't know about a post apocalypse, but Treasure Planet or a ladin where the heroes just in dire straits. Hobbit: Titan ae, I guess would be post-apocalyptic, or at least for Earth. Yeah. It's literally after Earth is what it stands for. Yeah. I don't know, I'd go see it can't be too judgmental on something where like, yeah, day one I'd be there watching it being like, what the fuck? Thandi: I'd be curious enough to look up the reviews, but yeah, Hobbit: nice . Yeah, Thandi: the audacity, why are you making this movie cause Hobbit: because money. All right. With you saying Brian Cox as well for your thing, I'm [00:27:00] just thinking a mashup for Mad Max. I would love to see Super Troopers three being in the post apocalypse where they're still working the highway patrol, but in a Mad Max type fashion, would be fucking great cuz Brian Cox, he. The boss in Supert Troopers, so yeah, that would be brilliant. Thandi: So, a couple fun mashups. Mad Max in weird science, like in that scene where Kelly Le Brock brings like the the Road Warrior style mutants to their party. At the end of the movie, she also brings Max, and then she ends up hooking up with Max instead of the nerds. Um, , And Mad Max and Waterworld. Where the the Mariner finally reaches dry land, but the dry land is Australia, and so he's in the jurisdiction of Max Rocke Tansky, now Hobbit: I I would watch that movie. 100% Thandi: Desert versus Duff Sea, Hobbit: Mad Max Fury, tsunami. I don't know. Yeah. Mad Max Tsunami. Okay, so we've [00:28:00] got two very different takes on Mad Max. Both of which I think we would probably be murdered online for even suggesting so Perfect. Perfect for us. Um, And now we're doing the trailers, so let me get that. From the director that brought you Crank one, crank two, and Ghost Rider. Spirit of Vengeance is an American take on a cult classic Meet Max. He's mad. Played by Stephen Yon and he'll stop at nothing to take down the toe cutter crew and restore order to the Midwest this summer Max. Loses his wife Jesse, played by Darcey Carden, and him and his buddy Jim Goose, played by Christopher Maloney are wiping the streets red with the blood of their enemies. With the help of Fifi, their boss, played by Terry Cruz. They go up against Tommy Flanagan as Bubba Zanetti, Nicholas Cage as the leader of the toe cutters, toe [00:29:00] cutter, and hijinks ensuing. Burnout. Fuck boy. Pete Davidson. As Johnny the Boy. Are you mad? You will be with this remake Mad Max America Road. Thandi: Oh, I didn't give my director actually. Before we continue my director was Clarence William, or I'm sorry, Chris Williams. Clarence Williams is somebody I went to high school with Chris Williams, who directed Big Hero six and the Hobbit: man. Both of those are really, I didn't realize it was the same director, big hero of six I love that movie so much. Sea Beast was better than I expected it would be. Thandi: Yeah, I've heard nothing, but I haven't watched it all the way through yet. I started it and I got distracted, but it's on the list because I've heard nothing but good things about it. I heard, I've heard it's Hobbit: Yeah. With directors for animated films. I that that's a thing. Like you, you think of directors like directing live actors, you know, but I'm sure there's plenty that goes into directing Lincoln animated film, possibly even more than a regular film. There's amazing director like Brad Bird who did the Incredibles movies [00:30:00] and stuff that did Directors of animation, but I never really think about it. Thandi: Yeah. Those guys do some some amazing work and they have to entertain a larger audience than many other directors do. So they have to get their lesson in there, keep the parents occupied, keep the kids occupied. It's a. An interesting juggling job to pull that together. speaking of entertaining an audience we've got your take next for your trailer I hate it. Hobbit: So let me light it up. You ready to roll? Let's get this car on the road, I guess. Thandi: From Chris Williams in Dreamworks. It's a movie about what happens when you're too good at what you do in a world that's not Chris PR is Mad Max Rocke Tansky the best cop on the Arizona Highway. His wife played by Kristen Bellis, Jesse Rocke Tansky, and she just wants him to make friends. Sprague, his [00:31:00] dog is Kevin Hart. Cutting up and having fun on the highway is a fight keeper. Sutherland's tow trimmer and his boys, Patrick War Burton and James Franco. As they try to win the big race, but are they good enough to win the big race? And does it matter when The most important thing on the road as having the drive to be the best, to take it all on your own, even when it threatens to drive away you from the only race that matters, the race to be the best of friends. Mad Max, the best of friends coming this summer. Hobbit: Friend Road Um, I, yeah. Fuck it. Yeah, let's make this kid's movie. I, I'm, I, you know what, you changed my mind. I am on board with this yet to get another banger from Tandy in the, in the Wackadoo category. So [00:32:00] Wackadoo. Hell yeah. This was a blast. I am really glad that I got a chance to rewatch Mad Max. It's one of. The road warrior is so good. Like the sequel is so, so good that I sometimes, Thandi: And that's the one that everybody has seen. That's Hobbit: yeah. And so I forget sometimes that Mad Max is still very good. Like it's a really good starter to this universe that gets created Thandi: Yeah. Hobbit: and then you throw in Thunderdome and just have a like silly blast. Thandi: And, but none of them have what Mad Max has, which is the Hall of Justice. Hobbit: I forgot yet. Thandi: They like an old abandoned cement factory. That's the Hall of Justice, and that is awesome in itself. Hobbit: Not just genre, but he permanently changed the way people did dystopian Futures with this movie. And it was basically because he was in the outback of Australia and he had access to these abandoned buildings and he's like, great. Yeah.  Cool. This is what it is. Like this is the police station and yeah, it's like a cement plant or something. Great. No Thandi: Yeah. No, he's he was inspired and they didn't run over the [00:33:00] kid, which was also inspired. That brought me in more than any other scene in the movie. Were the kids out in Hobbit: Oh, right, yeah, yeah, Thandi: They're driving. They're driving. I was like, he was, this movie's kind of crazy, but they're not gonna kill this kid. Whew. Hobbit: pet cemetery. This is not, Pet Cemetery is like, fuck that kid. Thandi: Oh, guess we'll need to add that one to the list too. Actually. That's already been remade. Hobbit: Yep. Terrible remake, unfortunately, but at least compared to these bangers that we brought on this episode here, think Mad Max needs to go a new direction, with some of our choices here. Thandi: Hit us up. Hobbit: we're ready and waiting. So speaking, of, waiting, we're waiting for you to follow us on social media, Facebook, Twitter.  Just follow geeks of the influence on Instagram, Twitter, you've got me and Thandi on Twitter. We've gotta smack my pitch up. uh, pitch smacked on Twitter. got Facebook keep track of when episodes are coming out. We'll let you know when there's cool stuff happening. Maybe some live event. And, yeah, it's a great way to get all the pitch smacking that you could ever want. Thandi: [00:34:00] Yeah, All All smacked all day long. Oh it's got a rosy glow Hobbit: from all the smackings. So on that uh, yeah, re review, subscribe, post on socials, let people know how cool this show is and how bad our choices are. But that's half the fun. Gotta thank Of course. Tandy, thank you so much for joining me on this. Thandi: Thank you, sir. Hobbit: I'll find you next time. Thandi: I'm Thandi. Hobbit: and you just got pitch smacked, Thandi: Hey, pitch another smacking shrimp on the Bobby Hobbit: mate. Good day. Good day. Thandi: Fosters it's pitch for smack. Hobbit: Jesus.

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 96 - Freejack: Orphans of a Nihilistic God Transcript at the bottom of show notes Hobbit and Thandi enter the spiritual switchboard to remake and remix the 1992 dystopian sci-fi film Freejack starring Emilio Estevez, Anthony Hopkins, Rene Russo, and Mick Jagger Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" "The Voyage" "Corporation Motivation" and "Assassins" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries   Transcript: [00:00:00] Hobbit: Hello geeks and welcome to another amazing episode of Smack My Pitch Up, the podcast that reboots, remakes, reimagine sequels, sidequels, and adapt some of your favorite and least favorite. And let's face it poorly. Created from the past, Thandi: They're Hobbit: that definitely the case for this one. That's been the inspiration for this show in the first place was movies like this one that we're gonna talk about today, where the idea is good. It's an interesting concept, but the execution leaves a lot to to be appreciated Thandi: And then they decide to cast Emilio Estevez. Yes. And it ruins the whole project. Hobbit: Oh man. You know what? Not all the time Repo Man was a perfectly good movie. Perfectly good and weird movie. But besides that, yeah, pretty Thandi: Yeah. Repo Man's fun or repo man. Is it repo? It's repo man, right? Hobbit: repo Man, repo Men was a movie with Jude Law enforced Whitaker years later. [00:01:00] That was weirdly close to the storyline of repo, the genetic opera. Thandi: What was the one where he and his brother were garbage men together? Hobbit: Men at Work Thandi: Ah, Hobbit: where they found a mo, a body the mob had dumped or something, I think was the, Thandi: involved in movies of the era, both literally and on screen. Just the mob was fun at that point. Hobbit: well, that was when the mob was like, get going on dateline and stuff to be like, yes, I do kill people. Like they were super about being publicly mobsters was the fun, fun time. Yeah. Right. But this movie, this is of that similar era. This is I think 91 or 92 when this movie was made. Thandi: 92 I think, or no, 90. Hobbit: yeah, 91. Yeah. I think it was made in 91, released in 92 or whereabouts. And it definitely reeks of that early nineties. Sci-fi. There was not a lot coming out at that time that, oh, by the way, my co-host Thandi is here Thandi: Hey, it's Thandi and I'm here and we've been talking. So does it [00:02:00] matter? Who knows? Hobbit: Who knows? We'll find out. Hopefully you already know who is running this this thing. So yeah, you've got 19 91, 92, you've got only a few sci-fi movies that you even remember from that era you've got, and this like demolition man and hackers and, what else do we got? Like virtuosity is around Thandi: abyss. When did that come? Hobbit: That was late eighties I wanna say. So that was still not. Of this era. This was kind of a a lull in sci-fi around the time that Fredj Jack came out. There wasn't a whole lot happening. Thandi: few years later, independence Day. What else stands Hobbit: Independence Day was that was 1999. I Thandi: No. Independence Day was like 95 or 96. I think it's Hobbit: Was it? You might be. I think you are right. Actually. Thandi: Yeah. Hobbit: I am. 96. Yeah. Okay. So I guess that's, yeah, that would be where the upswing started happening, I think was post Independence Day. But movies like this the Independence Day was a more than sci-fi, a big budget action comedy extravaganza type of a movie, whereas this was not meant to be that. We're [00:03:00] talking about Freejack. Listeners may not even be familiar with this film if you are interested in checking it out. It was available on basically all the free apps. Thandi: I watched it on Hobbit: Two. Which one? Tuby? Yeah, it was Tuby, Pluto TV free v I think even Roku channel. It was on. So you shouldn't have too much trouble tracking this down. And it's kind of a shame that this movie doesn't get brought up more in the conversation of, inspiration for other films. Like I feel like this is a predecessor to movies like strange Days, which is also an underappreciated sci-fi movie or Johnny mnemonic. This is definitely like a pre Johnny Mnemonic movie this is, in the path that leads you to Johnny Thandi: Well, leading to the ultimate extension of the idea, which is the matrix, it's like a Pokemon evolution and like the God version is the matrix. Hobbit: This is, William Gibson Light. This isn't actually based on a William Gibson story. I forget the name of the writer that this was based off of, I think a short story, but it has very much that William [00:04:00] Gibson energy whereas Johnny Monic, I think, is actually an adaptation from William Gibson. But it, it's that dystopian cyberpunk future kind of vibe. But the set dressing is way more streets of fire than it is a Blade Runner Thandi: Yeah. Or the Wiz it's got an interesting look for the kind of sci-fi that it's doing. Hobbit: also the time jump is fucking wild. In this movie, this is supposed to take place in, it's like 18 years and it goes from 1991, looking like 1991 with race cars and shit to, The world has fallen into the sewer and there's bone snatchers and time travel and tanks going through the street and utter fucking chaos. And Renee Russo is apparently a vampire that just doesn't age. Thandi: That was hilarious. That was hilarious to me. I was like, they didn't even try, they didn't put like a gray streak or anything. Hobbit: I thought that would've honestly made a more interesting. Conversation if Renee Russo looked like she [00:05:00] had aged 18 years and Emilio Estevez has hadn't, and how much does that affect their relationship? Because it's not just about looks, but it's also she's had 18 years of real hard living with the world basically falling apart. Even though she's doing really well, she's had to probably, Ignore her morals a lot to get to where she was. She's had to beg, borrow, and steal to survive. And she's working for basically an evil omnipresent corporation. How does that translate to Emil? It's been a day for Thandi: Yeah, and just what, 18 years of just general experiences and wisdom. Maybe a bunch of other stuff, maybe trauma, all kinds of stuff different loves. How does that translate? I mean, that's ultimately for that kind of movie, that's not a super important question because that bogs down the action or whatever. But yeah, it's a relevant question of how these people who are now or should be completely different people because of their specific experiences, the world fell apart. How does that make them [00:06:00] different human being? Hobbit: Renee Russo apparently is the most strong-willed human being to ever. Exist on the planet has not changed. A fucking iota is the same exact person from 1991. In the future of 2009 , this takes place. Thandi: the very least she willed the wrinkles away, so Hobbit: That's some serious fucking power right there. But I think the bones of this movie are good. It's the idea that that Emilio Vez is a race car driver who gets snatched right before he's in this fantastic and completely unrealistic. That happens where his race car, goes like off a ramp and then crashes into a bridge like in mid-air. It's buck fucking wild. Like they chose the least realistic way to send him out in this movie. Thandi: but it's fine that there's nothing is odd, that there's absolutely no body, no bones, anything. And they're like, eh, this shit happens. I guess Hobbit: Yeah, I guess he was vaporized or whatever. Yeah, I love that. Brad Carter, the his best friend [00:07:00] basically in this movie played by New York Dolls David Johansen. Thandi: Buster Poindexter, Hobbit: Buster Poindexter in this movie with the largest mouth in film. I think he's massive fucking mouth. Which makes his laughter like both really unsettling and hilarious whenever he cracks up. But he is bitching to Alex Furlong about how he couldn't get the insurance money because they couldn't find the body, which was fucking fantastic to me. He's like, oh, it's great. You're alive anyway. Thandi: I kind of wish he was in more of the movie. Hobbit: Seriously, he was such a fun, like he broke up some. Unnecessary seriousness of this movie. It, this movie should have been more fun than it was. This the set dressing. You shouldn't be trying to play this straight at all. And Amelia was trying, but he just he's not that strong an actor. He just isn't. Thandi: he's not that strong a presence either. I think that's the bigger thing for this kind of. he's a little dude, [00:08:00] but he's also got, his energy is not big enough. I don't know if he, if you turn this into more of a a fun movie and had Michael J. Fox as the little dude lead, then that would be a good time. But Emilio Estevez doesn't really carry this very well, and his energy is weird in the way that people interact with him as little kind of Mousey. Emilio Estevez is also just. Like it feels Hobbit: It is like nobody takes him seriously. He's supposed to be this like action lead in this movie and no, even the side characters are just don't give a fuck about him. Like he is nothing to anybody. Which is an interesting Kind of way to go about a movie like this. I like red Heat, think that the bones of this are good, but there is so much room to expand on this or add more depth or, undertone or more story to this. They, there's not a lot to this. You're able to, I'm assuming you guessed who the big, bad at the end was at the beginning of the movie. Thandi: That's the experience of [00:09:00] movie narrative, that's they don't hide it very well or sell it very well. It's just a thing and you don't even care about it. For most of the movie, it's like, whatever. I, Hobbit: Yeah. When it's finally revealed, it's like, oh, it's your, it's been your boss all along. She's like, no, it's not. and the crowd was like, no it is. This isn't hard to believe, like this is, it was pretty clearly him the whole time. And the cast on this, Hurt Boss being played by one Anthony Hopkins in this movie. Thandi: He had already done Hannibal Lecht or that movie had silence of the Lambs had already come out. But I think that he may have filmed this before his career blew up immediately after that. So he still had a stinker two to do or to show in there because Hobbit: Sure. Sure. He is an unbelievable one, one of the greatest actors of our time, but he also will do a stinker or two from time to time. I mean, he's in a Transformers movie, so if that Thandi: mean, the man has houses and cars to pay for too. So, Hobbit: Yeah, true . So, Mine is set in the past [00:10:00] 1991 is 2000. I'm not doing like a 1991 version of this. Are you sticking around the same timeline? Are Thandi: I am. I Hobbit: it in the same genre? Thandi: 2020 3, 20 20. Hobbit: Okay. So you're jumping from 2023 into the distance future of like Thandi: no, I'm not. We'll get into it in the take, but no, I'm not, Hobbit: So, well, let's get into it. I mean, there's not a lot more to say about this film. It's Thandi: uh, The director Jeff Murphy. Interesting career under Siege Two young guns two, and most interestingly to me, dude was a second unit director on all of the Lord of the Rings movies. Hobbit: Really? Wow. Okay. Thandi: So he is had a career of not obscurity, not complete obscurity, but I think most everything I saw that was involving him that was listed was pretty mediocre, except being a second unit director on the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Hobbit: Do you think that while he was shooting Lord of the Rings as second unit, that he was like bragging about his time [00:11:00] working on directing Mick Jagger, on Freejack, like back when I was directing Jagger back on Free Jack Set Thandi: Yeah. And then he follows it with the Steven Segal story. So Segal and I are tossing back some beers, Hobbit: Ian McConnell was like, I fucked Mc Jagger in 1996. Thandi: Oh let's go listen to Sir Ian's story. That's a much better story. Hobbit: me and Bowie look, had 'em tied up like a pair of Chinese finger cuffs Thandi: we were in shade of pasty tall men and it was the most beautiful thing that you had ever seen. Hobbit: It was like the human centipede, but with cum, Thandi: man. Is that appropriate for this show? I think it is cuz I think I've gone there before, but I haven't heard you go there. Hobbit: Hey, you know what, like this is marked as explicit, so I think we're okay. I think . Yeah. Okay, so yeah let's lay it down. We got formerly by the second unit director of Lord of the Rings, bringing down the original. What are we doing for [00:12:00] your real take on this? Thandi: So for my real take, I'm going with a tried and true modern genre, which is action, not really action comedy, but fun. Action. Hobbit: Sure. Action Romp Thandi: an action romp something with some high energy maybe a little bit of cynicism or probably a lot of cynicism, but more in keeping with what is popular in the modern time, cuz this is a 2023 movie that takes place in 2023. Hobbit: Sure. Thandi: So, in my movie I got rid of the time travel altogether I was like, this doesn't work the way it's presented. Really like how, that works. But what does work to take its place that's all over modern culture is multiverse stuff. So he is bone jacked across the multiverse to another 2023 Earth that's similar enough that you're like, oh it is 2023, I guess, but different enough where, it's a completely different place almost immediately upon. Hobbit: some like more totalitarian like little peppering [00:13:00] in there. Okay. Thandi: So, same race, car accident. Race car crashes, blows up. He's bone jacked to this other reality and escapes in much the same way. But in going around and looking at things, he's like, wow, there's so much that's the same but different. This is not where I'm supposed to be. He runs into a nun who tells him that he's a free jack and lets him know basically the scenario. She does a little exposition dump for him. I wanted to introduce that nun as a bigger part of this property, of this movie so that she's actually directly involved in a lot of of the movement, of the narrative. So I'm gonna introduce that nun as a person, as an actor right now, which is Kat Dennings is my nun in this. Yeah. And so she is the one who is the main secondary character the Robin to the character's Batman as they move through the the narrative. Although he does run into his his girlfriend in this reality, she comes off she [00:14:00] sold to him as a friend as are other people that he knows from his own reality are kind of sold to him as friends. They try to bring him. But it's all part of a scheme to bring him back into the clutches of the person who brought him to this reality in the first place. And that person exists as a, like a head on a screen. And you see him throughout the movie much as Sir Anthony Hopkins was a head on a screen as we go through the movie. But the outcome with that character's a little bit different. So they get adventures trying to escape the powers that be. He's introduced ultimately to Morgan, who was the character that was played by, I think his name is John Shea. John Shea was Lex Luther on Lois and Clark. So that's how I know that actor, like immediately when I see him. Oh, it's Lex Luther from Loon Clark. And John Shea is like the rebellion leader or whatever, or Morgan is the rebellion leader. So, they hook up with Morgan and the nun of the Morgan help him. We reached the same climax where everybody comes together and they try to do the consciousness [00:15:00] transfer. The big bat is revealed. It turns out that the the image of Ian McCandless was not who the character actually was. The real, super powerful, multi-billionaire that's driving this whole scheme. Is Alex Furlong himself, the lead himself. It's his alternate reality version that is dying and needs his body from an alternate reality. Hobbit: Nice. I like that. Thandi: In the the process of coming together and doing the climax he dies. And Julie, the girlfriend dies as well. But it plays out where they think that he's done the mind transfer, and of course, Victor Vacendak, who was. The character that was played by Mick Jagger helps him with his subterfuge. And because Julie dies and we want kind of a classic turn at the end, the Nun Kat Dennings, who's been helping him through the whole project what he finds out after becoming a multi-billionaire and ruling the world and going onto a new a. Is that in a casual conversation with Victor, he finds out that [00:16:00] nuns in this world don't take a valve chastity, and they do the furtive look and the like, the wink freeze take at the end. No, no action. Just a thing that says, yeah, he's gonna be fighting in this world cuz he's gonna have sex with cat denning, basically end of movie. So that's my version of Freejack starring as Alex Furlong. I have Joe Keery. I feel like Joe Keery has the right energy, and he's also. He's taller. I'm saying this is a short guy too. putting this out there. Just it's more believable for the way that people interact with him for what he's supposed to be. That his screen presence is a little bit better in always. So Joe Keery is my Alex Furlong. Hobbit: I can see just the scene from the original movie where he gets fucking hammered on one drink in the bar and he is talking to the camera people and he is like, I don't give a fuck. Fuck this dude. I can see Joe Curie having so much fun with Thandi: Like a good Hobbit: Like something similar to Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Thandi: For my Victor Vacendak I thought about going with a rockstar, but there [00:17:00] are no more rock stars. I'm not gonna have like Drake play my Victor Vacendak. So, Jason Statham is my Victor Vacendak. Jason Statham has the right British guy energy to be this kind of tough guy. This the. Kind of tough guy. That Victor Vacendak is Hobbit: a guy that says Roy a lot. Yeah. Yeah. Thandi: Croy. And then but not much else. It's very quiet otherwise. Hobbit: Occasionally it's just a low guttural growler. Thandi: My Julie Redland, the girlfriend character. I wanted somebody who falls into a trope that is not as prevalent in modern times. Which is the the strong, handsome woman trope. And I couldn't really think of anybody for a while. But Carrie Mulligan is my strong, handsome woman, As Julie Redland, who is not a friend, but a foe. And I think that especially in that aspect, Kerry Mulligan would work really. For Ian McCandless, who's not an actual person in the movie. So Ian McCandless was the Anthony Hopkins ultimate bad guy in the original [00:18:00] movie. In this movie, he's just a face and he's a ai like deep fake. He's a deep fake. He's not actually a person. Kevin Bacon is my Ian McCandless, Lucia the right combination of charm and gravity. I think that yeah, he could do. Without being Anthony Hopkins. He's got his whole different thing going, but with the gravity and the charm. My mark Michelette, who was God, what's that actor's name in the original movie? Hobbit: Mark. Oh, that's Jonathan Banks. He from breaking Bad. Yep. Thandi: As Mark Michelette, I have Colin Ferrell. Colin Ferrell can portray the right kind of menace. And, he's willing to play all different kinds of characters as he ages, not just the handsome guy. I think he would work out well under these circumstances. He holds the screen. He has the right kind of menace. Yeah, him for my nun, we already introduced Kat Dennings for Morgan, the revolutionary leader who's played by Lois and Clarks. Lex Luther. I have Smallville, Lex Luther, Michael Rosenbaum. I like Michael [00:19:00] Rosenbaum. I don't get to see him in many things, but yeah, I just like the idea of having Lex Luther in there as the same character. Hobbit: I would say he's turned out to be a really nice podcast host. I've really enjoyed some of the interviews that he's done on his show. Inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum Thandi: Nice. I've heard clips, of his podcast, but I I have not listened to the show. I'll have to check it out though, because like I said, I do like Michael Rosenbaum. Hobbit: He has a very, how do you say, calm kind of energy when he's on the show. There's no rush to him speaking. He is very casual and comfortable on the microphone. And so therefore, the guests really do feel like they're comfortable when they're talking, Thandi: I'll have to put that on the list. I think the only celebrity cast to listen to is Sarah Silverman. So, Hobbit: Oh, nice. Thandi: it'd be interesting to pick up something new. But and as my final character that I've casted as Brad, who is the Buster Poindexter character, David Johansen Busta Rhymes is my Brad and the version that I have in my mind, Brad lasts a little bit longer. Busta Rhymes gets to do more [00:20:00] stuff. He hasn't acted in years, but he does have acting experience and he's also very an interesting character to see on the screen. Hobbit: I'd be interested to see if there were any measurements of like mouth size between Buster Poindexter And Buster Rhymes cuz both of them, they both could fit like a softball in their mouth. They both have these massive Thandi: That's probably the one of the reasons that Buster took on that name. So, or Busta took on that name. But for my director, I have Sean Levy, who was the director of Free Guy and Night at the Museum, real Steel. Hobbit: That's smart. That's a good call. I like that. Somebody that is able to do kind of bigger action sci-fi stuff, but also can play in the comedy range as well. Yeah, exactly. Cool. Yeah, I think that's a a really smart choice for a real take here and. Alternate universe, I mean, timely. So you're really right in that wave of multiverse that's happening everywhere. Literally the best movie of 2020 two for most, for a lot of people was a multiverse movie with everything everywhere, all at once. DC Marvel, all going multiverse. it's, I'm just waiting for the sliders revival to come [00:21:00] through. Thandi: Oh, would love rem Hobbit: keep waiting probably. Yeah. They redid fucking Quantum Leap, but they can't do sliders. All right. That's fine. That's fine. I'll wait. That's cool. Yeah. Crying man. Oh, love Rembrandt. So, and yeah, and what's his face from Lord of the Rings and IA Jones? Thandi: John Reese Hobbit: John Reese Davies. Yeah. Oh, man. As a professor. Fantastic. Yeah I think you've got a really solid idea for Freejack that, not that it's a high bar, but I'd say that's a little better than the original Thandi: Yes. Once again, not a high bar. It's not a high bar. Hobbit: Yeah. I think giving some more of these characters, some agency is not a bad call that like most of these characters are just set dressing in the original movie. There's not a whole lot happening for them. Giving Julie A. Little bit more to do giving Brad Carter or Buster Poindexter's character, a little bit more to do, I think is really smart Thandi: Well, you know, that's indicative of the time generally. Like everything focused on the leads, everybody else is set dressing. And [00:22:00] then in the modern time, you need a team around the start to make interaction more interesting and to actually push narrative over set pieces. So yeah, by and large, the base formula for movies makes for more interesting movies in the modern time. Hobbit: A, and actually thinking about it around this time, I'm remembering two more movies that they were definitely depending on. Cult to personality for these sci-fi movies because two that came out in 90 and 91 Arnold Schwarzer movies, I believe total recall was 1990 and 91 was the Running Man. And both of those movies would've sucked with like an Emilio estevez level like actor in the role. You needed a bigger than life person to carry. Such a ridiculous, Thandi: have an interesting concept and then loads of set pieces. Hobbit: yeah. Thandi: like video. They're structured like video games. They don't have relationships or real complexity like that. Hobbit: So I think, yeah, Emilio was definitely not the best choice for this, but is definitely not the only reason why Freejack work. I think Sean Levy would be a great choice [00:23:00] for Modern Director. I decided to go the opposite direction of you with my remix version of this Thandi: Remix!. Hobbit: You went with the like, action romp. Role of it, because there isn't a lot to do with the plot from the original. The, it can be dressed up as just like a fun action romp and still have more depth to it than the original did. I went the other way where I looked for almost entirely just depth in this empty husk of a movie plot. So I decided that this is gonna be a conversation about what it is to be, to exist about the conversation of personhood and analog versus digital which is something that we're talking about in media nowadays, and also our presence on the internet versus who we are in real life. And there's a conversation that's happened in The Matrix and a number of other films, but with this, with time travel being the element and transferring a person's like consciousness, it's not gonna be that the physical body was transferred to the future so much. [00:24:00] It's basically almost like a transporter. Built the body in the future and transferred the consciousness into it. But they needed the consciousness basically to like jumpstart the body like with, they couldn't just build the body and then have the the in mechanics character jump into it. It needed to be kind of jumpstarted by the original consciousness first, which, whatever, it's all pseudoscience. Who fucking cares if that's like a real thing or not? So that I think gives it a little bit more. believability, I think is the idea of just taking almost like the DNA from the past to build a, to like transfer a consciousness into the future kind of thing. Thandi: also in keeping with giving it more weight, that already starts off with a very intriguing philosophical question. Hobbit: And then also that, how did that transfer go? The Alex Furlong character throughout this is having trouble, remembering things, having trouble like knowing what is real and what is suggested by the people like that. He runs into like his old friend, Brad Carter. He can't really remember how, if their relationship was like strained or not in the [00:25:00] past. There's parts of his memory you can remember and there's stuff that's coming back, but he doesn't know how much is coming back or if it ever will. And so he's trying to put this together as the plot is like unfolding and he's not entirely sure if this is real or some kind of fantasy made up in his brain as he's dying. He's. Completely removed from anything that he is familiar to him. So everything is up for question, Thandi: and you also get like a real really strong ship of Theseus discussion under those circumstances. Hobbit: Right. Yeah, absolutely. Like, yeah. Is it the same person at the end of the day? I thought that was beautifully done in the in the modern version of that in John dies at. Where it was about a hammer that you re, you replaced the head of the hammer and the actual like handle of the hammer. Is it the same hammer that you bought? It's the same ship of Theseus thing, but do that with the human body. Yeah. When, When you reconstruct the consciousness to a degree, is it the same consciousness? It's if it's a different body. At the same time, the plot is the same. You've got the Ian McCann's character, or there's this like [00:26:00] presence that is the puppeteer of this whole thing. And then you've got Alex Furlongs estranged girlfriend, originally played by Renee Russo. I really wanted to have the age conversation more in this version. So, for Alex Furlong, I casted Aronofsky is my Thandi: Oh. Hobbit: off. Yeah. And his whole thing is about obsession and addiction. And also being the orphans of an nihilistic God is a common theme in his stuff. Thandi: And making movies that say, man did I like that. Yeah, I like that. Did I? Did. I like that. Hobbit: And because it's so artistic that you're like, feel obligation to like it. if I'm gonna be a movie guy, I have to like it, which is the feelings I had walking outta the whale, which I hated. And I know I saying that I might get shit on for it, but I don't care. Like, I think the performances were incredible. I think that Brendan Frazier deserves all of the accolades that he's getting. I think the movie was exploitative and kinda shitty and didn't serve any [00:27:00] purpose really, in my opinion. But Thandi: I'm sure there's a creative thesis at the bottom of that would make you be like, all right, I get it. I don't like this movie, but I. Hobbit: yeah I've had conversations about it since, and I get what maybe was trying to be done, but I think that the ends didn't justify the means. For me anyway, with that movie. But that being said, I am a fan of Aronofski. I think that he's done some very challenging and very interesting work pie. It was an incredible film. Black Swan Requiem for a Dream, which was great, and I'll never watch ever again. Same with Mother. The Fountain was an interesting Thandi: not like mother or the fountain. I did not like the fountain. Hobbit: The Fountain I think, had some very interesting concepts that it, that he took six. To make that movie. I think it was one of those situations that he had too long to develop the story and it ended up working against him. If he had less time to develop it, it was overworked and came off hollow in its delivery. But the themes of conquering death [00:28:00] I think are gonna be echoing in this version of Freejack. Also Aronofsky is known for taking. Actors that are on the end of their popularity and pulling 'em back into focus again. He did that with the wrestler and then he did that also with the whale, with with Brendan Frazier. So for Alex Furlong, Taylor Latner from Twilight is gonna be pulling the the weight of of Alex Furlong in Thandi: would ni be nice to see his return to pop culture. Hobbit: And also I think, He's done a couple things since Twilight. I don't know how good an actor he can be, cuz I don't think he's ever really been given the chance to stretch those legs fully. So, you've give Thandi: martial arts spy guy movie in an airport theater or coming from the airport at layover. And man, like after watching that, I know why he's not, he dropped out of of usage in Hollywood. But yeah, everybody deserves a chance and it just takes some training. Spend your time in acting school and get your muscle. Hobbit: Yeah, just, and I mean, he can do the action stuff and he can [00:29:00] come off as like a hothead young, like race car driver type character. I think he that's not too much of a push for him. And he's like 31 or 32. So he's young enough that he can play like a young hothead racer guy. Julie, his girlfriend in the future is gonna be played by Laura Dern. wanted to have an attractive, but definitely older than the main character actress Laura, as you were saying, like a handsome Thandi: Yeah, she was who I thought of actually. Actually as I was trying to think of somebody who was an A, a handsome actress. she's too old for what I was going for, but yeah, she did come to Hobbit: for what I'm going for. I wanted there to be a clear. Differentiation in age between the two. So Taylor Latner and Laura Dern, it does seem a little bit mismatched with their ages when you were to say put 'em together on screen. But I want that's what I'm going for, is that time is not just showing on their face, but also in their experiences that, Laura Dern has had to get harder as a person has had to go through a lot of shit and like remove the [00:30:00] part of herself that probably was mostly. Alex fell in love with in the first place. Her softness, her warmness her her optimism of the world. So like how much of that is left and if there's not much of that left, then is he just in love with the idea of the person or still the person? And that goes into the conversation about our consciousness, who we are. Are we like the layers of our skin? That every like seven years, it's an entirely. Set of skin on our bodies like the ship Theseus. If we are totally a different person than we were 10 years ago, 20 years ago, is it a ship theseus thing with our consciousness? Are we still the same person or are we actually a different person? And so that's the conversation that I'm putting into free Jack. It's like this evolution of consciousness, and Alex is going through it with him being basically scanned into a cloned body. Julie's going through it through the passage of time. And Ian McCandless, the main character, Anthony Hopkins, is [00:31:00] actually in what they called what do they call it? The spiritual switchboard. But he hasn't been there for three days. He's been there for literally years and it's been hush hush within his corporation and his handler. Mark Michelette has been basically speaking for him. He has been a ghost in the machine, the whole time. And so the, he has this feeling of omnipotence, a narcissistic God that has removed himself from morality by being part of this machine for so long. But the one thing that he doesn't have is companionship. And he does want that from Julie who he has had interactions with, virtually. And so that's why he needs the body is just the one thing that he can't get from being omnipresent on the net. The digital version of himself is like physical love, and so that's why he goes for Alex Furlong and he, but he needs that consciousness in there briefly. The argument at the end of it is whether or not Alex is the same person, if Ian is the same person, if it's a combination of the two, [00:32:00] because at the end of Freejack. They have basically a mind fight, which is like the dumbest shit in the world that like, is so poorly portrayed on screen. There's like screens that are flipping, like Thandi: the screensaver from windows xb or Windows 95 Hobbit: like it's a prison thing that Zod is in and Superman floating through the phantom zone. And there's fire behind Emilio Estevez. He's like, ah, it's so cheesy. I think. The part where he has to read off his human code or whatever to Mick Jagger in the original, the joke at the end is that Mc Jagger, it was totally wrong, and Mc Jagger just said that it was correct, so that he had a change of heart. Fuck that. He got it right because he's now a combination of Alex Furlong and. Mc Candless, but that combination actually gives him the opportunity to better identify with Laura Dern's character. He now has levels of experience over those years from his incorporation of the two people. He has, he's got like the humanity from Alex Furlong and he's [00:33:00] got the experience and. Success from Ian McCandless. And so he actually has a chance to be with Laura Dern by being a combination of parts of these two people. Thandi: It functionally leaves him as a new person Hobbit: Yeah, a new person that she's gonna give it a shot, and have this ambiguity at the end. Like, is this gonna work? I don't know. I don't even know who, you don't even know who you are yet, but we'll find out together kind of thing. So Freejack is all about who we are and if we are different people at different points in our lives, or if we're just a evolution the actors. Taylor Latner for Alex Furlong, Laura Dern for Julie Redland. Ian McCandless, I wanted the virtual version of this person. It's not gonna be like an older character. It's gonna be also. World is rife with disease. It doesn't have to be an old man that's dying. It could be somebody that just you know, all the pestilence the world. Let's give it a Bradley Cooper. Let's have somebody that is classically super handsome, as the [00:34:00] villain. You don't have to have an old man that's dying. Thandi: Yeah, and he's a strong actor. he can do. what he can do. Hobbit: yeah, I think he can do it. and then Mark Michel Gillette. I wanted somebody that has this calmness to them, Jonathan Banks in most of what he does. There is no rush to the way he speaks. He feels confident in the scenes. He feels like he knows what's going on more than anybody else in the scene. And I wanted somebody that had that level of, gravitas that there's this energy around them that they are both calming and also like, Ooh, I don't know if I wanna fuck with them. And. Dramatically underrated actor, in my opinion, is Sterling K. Brown, who, he had a very small, scene in Black Panther as N'Jobu, he was, this Is Us. But also what really sold me on him was his portrayal of the defendant in Marshall. He was so good in that role and just brought it, and I think it's criminal how under. Thandi: Oh, he's a great actor Hobbit: great Discussed he is as far as like dramatic actors. Yeah, he's fantastic. So, definitely check out Marshall if you haven't. He's the defendant. I forget the name of [00:35:00] the character, blew me outta the water. Fantastic. Only reason I think there wasn't more conversation is you've got Chadwick Bozeman in there, so kind of a Scotty Pippen and Michael Jordan situation going. Thandi: Look, I got a wife that looks just like yours. Hobbit: So Then we got the rock stars, we got Mick Jagger and Buster Pointdexter. We got two actors that aren't good actors. One is a little bit better than the other, as of Cult a personality, at least that's David Johansen from the New York Dolls. I'm getting Tom Waits in there. Also a big weirdo that has been acting for years, have a lot of fun with it. Thandi: Yeah, he was, renfield. Hobbit: And well, and he's in mystery men, as well. all of the, uh, like coffee and cigarettes and, uh, Jim Jarmusch all of those. Then I wanted a rockstar, quote unquote, that would not be a good actor. I don't know if I've ever seen them in a movie. I cannot imagine. They're good at acting. They don't need to be. They're just the hot rock star, character. Adam Levine as Victor Vacendak, just stand there with covered in tattoos [00:36:00] looking like a weird, like bone jacker thug from the future with all of his, like tattoos that he got in like a three year period. Thandi: I'm not threatened by you, Adam Levine Vacendak. I, I can't I can't even take you seriously. Hobbit: That's exactly why I chose him, because there's nothing threatening about Mick Jagger in his role either. he's, just. A weird placeholder character and I said, let's just keep going with that. Let's just carry that energy over with Adam Levine. So yeah, I think that's it. So the whole point of this Freejack version is to, discuss the nature of, personhood. What makes you a person Thandi: Yeah. And, that's your gift with these pitches to add meat to the bone Hobbit: Yeah, absolutely. Speaking of meat to the bone, the real meat of this show is, the trailers , the, uh, the trailers Thandi: I remember my pitch enough to actually do a trailer out of it. Hobbit: God. Yeah. That's the hard part of going first is, trying to remember everything. So let me get that queue up. Thandi: The years [00:37:00] 2023 and Stranger Things, Joe Keery is Alex Furlong, a race car driver who's about to die and go to 2023. Freejack, a movie that finds Joe Keery in a situation that is his own, but very much not his own, starring as his alternate universe. Girlfriend Carrie Mulligan as the nun who helps him along his way. Kat Dennings. And also starring Michael Rosenbaum. Busta Rhymes. Kevin Bacon, Colin Farrell and Jason Statham from Director Sean Levy. Take yourself to an alternate version of your life and make it better freejack Hobbit: yeah. Thandi: Wow. Hobbit: Yeah, I think that was a good choice. The intro music for that one I think fit relatively well. Nice. Nice. All right. Now onto my fucking, I have no idea how I'm gonna do this Aronofsky version. So we're gonna find out together. Always the best [00:38:00] not plan ahead. Go for it. Thandi: Yeah, straight from the dome is not my favorite way to do it but, uh, I Hobbit: Here we go, .Okay, cool. Let's light this turd candle. Here we go. Who are you? Who am I? What is it To be alive this fall, Alex, Furlong, finds out as he's transported to the future of 2041. Alex Furlong, a race car driver with a loving fiance, Julie. Dies in a horrifying car wreck, or does he, his consciousness transferred to the future and put into a clone version of his own body only to be chased through this dirty dystopian streets by a menacing presence. Taylor Lautner is Alex Furlong. Julie Redland, it played by Laura Dern, [00:39:00] fights against. Bradley Cooper and Sterling K. Brown, as Darren Aronofski asked the question, what is it to be alive? Also featuring Tom Waits Free Jack. Thandi: the trailer that asks you, I love it, or do I. Hobbit: I think Freejack should be in the conversation more about the progression of sci-fi movies and what they were trying to do and what they were trying to say. But that doesn't mean it's a good film. I think it's one of those films that, it had some tools that it could have used a lot better. Other movies did use them a little bit better, but, I think it's still worth a mention from time to time. Thandi: No, it's interesting actually, on Tubi, there were a whole just truckload of, of B sci-fi movies from that era that I'm sure most of 'em were straight to video, but that were the end of that. If you like this, you'll like this. That I was very curious Will I ever watch them? Uh, I still drink [00:40:00] sometimes, I guess so, uh, there's Hobbit: These, These, kind of movies, Freejack, if you have the opportunity, it is a perfect movie to throw on with some friends and a few drinks or a few, uh, other inebriates and enjoy for sure. And that's what I love about this era of sci-fi is they're bad. Most of them are really bad, but. This used to be my Saturday afternoons. Uh, When Ms. Amy Bogarde was still working on Saturdays, I would have the whole afternoon to watch this garbage. I would never ask her to watch with me love her too much. I wouldn't put her through that. And I'd watch like the core, uh, ,,like the 2004, Thandi: Man, that was a dumb ass era of movies. Hobbit: oh so bad. But there's something kind of special about how. Unfortunately bad they are, and they're still happening. There's still the geo storms and hurricane heists out there that are just as bad. It's just that their budgets are bigger for some reason, because Thandi: year, moon fall. Hobbit: moon fall is the biggest pile of hot fucking garbage. And I'm also like weirdly into [00:41:00] it at the same time, like I'm angered by the fact that it got so much money to be made. that was a hundred million dollar movie. This is a sci-fi channel movie. This isn't a, this shouldn't be a real, like a real real movie Thandi: When you have a legacy, you can make poop monster movies Hobbit: Oh God. That's right. That was rolling Emrick, wasn't it? That's why. Yeah. Oh God. But watched Moon, uh, fall more than once, I think three times now. I've seen it. Thandi: Wow. How does that work? Hobbit: Once out of morbid curiosity the other time, because I kept talking about it, Thandi: Man, you a PopCultist about your infatuation with Moon fall Hobbit: Amy jokes that it's my favorite movie because then we watched it together and she's like, wow, this is real, this is worse than you even described. And then I, I forget, I maybe watched it with another friend at some point, but yeah, it's just, it's. So bad that I just, I can't wrap my brain around the fact that it actually exists. Like this is something that like is in the world [00:42:00] that was made, people signed on, like actors were in this movie and acted at it and. Thandi: The halle Berry had to pay for houses and cars too, I guess. Hobbit: There was a special effects person whose marriage fell apart because they were working so many long hours on the special effects for this garbage fucking movie. And so they're like signing the divorce papers the weekend that this movie comes out and they see it in the theater. They're like this, this is what I sacrificed my marriage for is moon fall. This is, this is what I think about when watching Moon fall, because it's definitely not the plot. Thanks so much everyone for listening to this episode of Smack My pitch up, and, uh, Thandi. Thank you so much for, begrudgingly, going through this Mick Jagger, movie. The future of Thandi: thank you mate. Hobbit: Crikey, make sure To rate, review, subscribe, tell you friends, repost our stuff on social media. Please, please share our stuff. , that's the best way for us to get around to New Ears is for you to repost the stuff from our social media. And, we will find you next time [00:43:00] for another episode of Smack My Pitch Up. I'm Mike The Hobbit, Thandi: I'm Thandi. tdy. Hobbit: and you just got, uh, the pitch smacked outta ya from the future Thandi: Yeah. Little pitch, and a swing, and a miss.. Pitch and a swing Oh, and a Miss Hobbit: mist,

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 95 - Red Heat: Republican Mustache Transcript at the bottom of show notes Hobbit and Thandi start a new cold war as they fire of remakes and reimaginings of the 80's action classic Red Heat starring Jim Belushi and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" "Bustin Loose" and "Assassins" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries   Transcript:   === Hobbit: [00:00:00] Hello geeks and welcome to another amazing episode of Smack My Pitch Up, the podcast that reboots remakes, reimagine sequels cycles, and adapts some of your favorite and least favorite properties from film, television, and whatever else we decide to do that week. And with me as always, my fateful companion into the realms of remakes. We got Thandi Woodard here. Thandi: How do, Hobbit: How Thandi: I wanted to say hello and Russian, but I could not remember what Hello and Russian is,  Hobbit: Yeah. I think I have was it nine? No, that's German. I don't know any Russian, actually.  Thandi: we all know Das Vidanya. Hobbit: Yeah. Sag. Yeah. There we go. That's all I've got and that's about as close to Russian as Arnold Schwarzenegger. In this next movie that we are talking about, I'll smack my pitch up. I was about to say, he does his best. He doesn't even try. Thandi: Can I tell you that I I chose this movie and I'm sorry, like it's not it's not. I [00:01:00] remembered it being fun and it's not unfun, but it's not good. It's not like eighties movies have their own vibe or whatever, and this is like the ultimate mediocre representation of mediocre eighties. Hobbit: I know a lot of stuff happens in this movie, but it does feel like nothing happens in this movie. It's just like they, they walk from point A to Thandi: said, everybody's. Just doing eighties. The Walter Hill's you know what guys? Just do just be eighties guys. Just be eighties guys and that'll be the movie that we put out as you guys being eighties guys. Just do that. Hobbit: It should have been understood just by the casting that they had the lesser belu. In this movie, and that should have been enough to know that, okay, we're just phoning this in. This is not nobody needs to really go for it on this one. Cuz Belushi, he's clearly the comic relief character like the smart ass, grizzled cop from Chicago character. But there's nothing funny about him at all. Like he's just he, it's not, he's not even annoying. He's just a [00:02:00] non-existent Thandi: And he's supposed to be funny because he's supposed to be like ably charming or whatever, but he's n he's just irritating and it is yeah. You feel what they're going for with this as an eighties movie, and it just, it doesn't all the way work. It's not bad. It's not terrible. It's just a wet fart of an eighties action. Hobbit: I will say the best part of this movie for. Has to be hands down. Not that there's a really big competition here, but when they're playing chicken with buses, that was really, I'm like, okay, you know what? That's new. I'm, I've not seen that there's a whole movie about a bus driving fast. Didn't go against another bus. It was just one bus. Thandi: sure. Why not? Yeah. Everybody should die here, but they're not or whatever, and it doesn't matter. Like I feel like the climax is really anti-climactic it, even though it's a big set piece. It doesn't go hard. It doesn't feel hard enough when it ends, and Schwartzenegger just ends the movie. He just ends [00:03:00] the Oh, the guy. Okay. You're gone. Needs a fight or something like schwartzenegger and Belushi fighting like 50 guys or something. Hobbit: That's the thing. Schwarzenegger doesn't even really fight a lot of people in this. He shoots a couple folks, but there's not a whole lot of hand to hand. Yeah. And Thandi: The naked fight in the snow, which is, it's fun. That's fun. Hobbit: That's fun. That is fun. Yeah, definitely. But we are talking about, if you didn't realize from the title of this episode we're talking about the movie Red Heat some classic eighties, Arnold Schwartzenegger. Buddy cop movie from Russia meets Chicago, I guess was the Thandi: What are the most eighties that ever aided with the lesser belu? Hobbit: also, this is like the tail end of the Cold War. This movie's coming out and you're rooting for the Russian operative this whole time, which is, that's a weird, that's a weird choice. There's No. [00:04:00] So it's not about rooting for the Russian operative. It's about rooting for the police. He's the police and you're supporting the, it's the, because even he's ah, we are not politicians. It's okay for us to be to like each other. Whatever. It's about respecting the police and supporting the police. Thandi: The working man basically. It's the work, it's the respect for the working man, whether they're Russian or American or whatever. And the heroic eighties style police that don't do anything wrong, it's just they're fighting against a corrupt world no matter what country they're in. Hobbit: I had a rollercoaster of emotion at one moment in this movie where they're talking about drugs in their countries Thandi: Yeah. Miami with, they're turning into Miami. Yeah. Hobbit: And Arnold is like in. Our country, we, you our country, I'm not gonna do it. Aye. Aye. Aye. They were having issues with like drugs coming in from China. So they rounded up all of all the drug Addicts, [00:05:00] all of the drug dealers and took them to the square and sh killed them. Like just shot 'em. And Belushi's response to that wasn't like, oh fuck, that's hardcore. He was like, yeah, they won't let us do that here. It's unfortunate. Like the politicians won't let us do that. And Schwarzenegger's then you tie them up and shoot them first. And she's huh. And so first he's talking rounding up the drug dealers and the drug addicts and like shooting. And I'm like, fuck, that's hardcore. And then he is like, just murder the politicians. I'm like, That Thandi: Yeah. And Belushi's no we. We gotta kind of follow the law and it they make light of the American justice system as it stands to protect the citizenry. I, in this movie, basically it's super hardcore like pro police state, Hobbit: It really is. Thandi: The, they're like the world's on fire because of darkies and foreigners, or, And the only way they're protect it is to have this hardcore, [00:06:00] no rules, no holds barred. Police state, Hobbit: and everybody's on board like that. That is, I really didn't dive that deep into the thought process between the Chicago police and these Russians that are showing up that are the enemy of the country. But they're all cops, so they're like, oh, you kill innocence too. Cool. Great. Okay. We're like, That is Buck Wild. What is nice about a movie? Yeah. . With a movie like this though, there is so much room to build from it that it does make for an interesting choice, for a smack my pitch up. Because Thandi: does because it you, you don't have to respect the movie. There's nothing to hold sacrosanct in this circumstance. You can go hog wild. Hobbit: And one thing that I really wanted to dig into more with mine is That Russia and the states aren't on the best of terms like that just kind of gets glazed over. If anything, it was more of they acted almost like they were buddies, but you still gotta be careful about your state [00:07:00] secrets. That was the kind of energy that they were playing with each other. It was like don't trust Americans don't trust the Russians. And that's it. I really want to inject a little bit more of. Cold War Energy back into this. Although my version is a modern take, it takes place in the modern day. But I just, there's so many weird choices in this movie for it to come out as just like a perfectly fine, mediocre movie. Tom or Jim Belushi, Jim Belushi and and Arnold. Hanging out together. It was like the Kmart version of True Lies with Tom Arnold. Got the the kind of like rubenesque like cop and then the the hardcore badass dude working together. But True lies worked. Thandi: Yeah. Yeah. The it's interesting because Walter Hill has directed some of our favorite movies, including a movie we've done a pitch on before. He was the director of the [00:08:00] Warriors. Hobbit: Oh, wow. This is so far removed from from the whimsy of the warrior. Thandi: Yeah it's so different from the Warriors. He was director of Streets of Fire. It's different from that. He directed both 48 hours, which are actually pretty decent. But tonally are very similar to this. They just the stars, they work better. They have better synchronicity maybe, I don't Because Arnold Schwarzenegger is a big freaking movie star. And actually Jim Belushi can be okay, as I remembered, cuz I saw this in the theater back in the day. I thought he was okay in this. But yeah, this is a little bit obnoxious. Maybe it's just a product of so much time having passed, but. Hobbit: I don't know, but I am interested to see how we decide to build upon this this very simple structure. Basic gist is there is a Russian former operative or current operative that goes to the states to work out a drug deal to move Koch into [00:09:00] Russia. And Arnold is tapped to go get Thandi: Oh, he's a career criminal. He's a career Hobbit: oh, career criminal. Yeah. And he's mother Russia doesn't wanna look bad in the face of the Americans and the rest of the world by having drugs like brought into their country. Arnold goes to stop him basically to get him without airing the dirty laundry of what he gets stopped for. Cuz he's gets stopped for like an unregistered gun. Right. Is that the Thandi: Arnold goes after him because he killed his partner. Hobbit: Sure. That's why he gets, that's why he gets tapped basically. Is that yeah you're gonna do a good job here going after this guy. And and he kind of does. I like this. Injecting a little more plot into this. Mine is a modern day take it has a stylized action kind of vibe to it where everybody is able everybody looks good, nobody's tripping over themselves. It's not like a it's not so much comedic [00:10:00] as it is kind of fun and it's approach. Some comedic moments, but definitely more of a just straight up, like over like stylized action kind of movie. For me, I, Ivan Danco was a very hard casting choice. I needed somebody that was, if not Russian, able to do a decent Russian accent. So that required a little bit of research. I decided to go with a kind of a, you think of him like he would be an action star and he is done some action movies, but he is done more dramas than he's done action movies is Tom. Thandi: Oh, yeah, Tom Hardy is an action star and he's a great dramatic actor. He's both things. Hobbit: And I think there's a stoic sense that he has, especially if you saw Lawless. He's really good in that that I think would lend itself to playing an Ivan Danco kind of character. And he was in a movie called Child 44, where he had a Russian accent and it was good. It was a decent Russian accent. It wasn't too over the [00:11:00] top. It. My favorite Russian accent, which is clearly John Malkovich and Rounders. That is definitely Thandi: still made fun of today. Yeah. Hobbit: I need to find the shirt. I found a shirt that it says on the shirt. I need that shirt. It's brilliant. If you haven't seen rounders, the movies, whatever it's a fine movie, I guess, but Thandi: Was it you that No, it was a YouTube video I saw recently. Who was in that movie with him? One of his co-stars. Hobbit: There was oh, who was in it? Matt. Matt Damon was in it, I think. And it was Matt Damon. So. Malkovich is doing the pee Him he's doing the horrible Russian accent or whatever, and everybody's oh, yay, John Malkovich and Matt Damon's what the fuck is this guy doing? And then there's a they, this, there's a scene break and Malkovich sees the confusion on Matt Damon's face and he looks across the table at him and he is I'll tell you a secret. [00:12:00] I'm a terrible actor. That's it. That's incredible. That is incredible. Oh, that's so good. Yeah. I thoroughly suggest, if you haven't seen Rounders is worth it just for. Malkovich is bits in it, it's so fucking good. But yeah, Tom Hardy can actually do a Russian accent play. Ivan Donk. This version of the film Ivan is drafted to go after a former military asset Victor Rust roti that, yeah, former former Ukrainian. Picked up by the, by Russia to do cyber warfare. Basically, he's a hacker type person. He, his estranged daughter and not wife. The Gina Ghan character, I switched from wife because they never even have any moments of chemistry or anything. And it doesn't matter. I feel like a daughter has a little bit more like ooph [00:13:00] to it, and their relationship are a little different here. He's a strange daughter is young adult living in the America, is doing her thing. He really just has been absent from her life, wants to do stuff best by her, and is seeing this vast amount of corruption that's happening within his country and also within the United States. Partly a cocaine shipment that is getting ready to be shipped to Russia courtesy of the CIA as a means of trying to like they did with KRA in. In the in the eighties destabilization. Yeah. what they don't realize is that Russia's already got crocodile. So Coke doesn't do dick for them. Like coke, cocaine is like a cup of coffee. But Thandi: could you sprinkle some bath salts on this? Hobbit: right? But he decides since there's this large amount of cocaine and money being exchanged between governments in a super secret way, that he has access to the information on where it. He can steal it or, and use [00:14:00] that as a means of getting money from both governments, pitting them against each other and getting out a dodge with his daughter while they go fighting one another. He's basically setting up the governments to blame each other for the disappearing coke and u and using the money that he gets from extorting to basically disappear off the map of his daughter. That's his. And it goes awry. It does not work. Ivan NCO gets sent out by the Russian government to stop him because if he gets caught by the Americans, he has a ton of Russian secrets that he would probably very handily hand over exchange for his freedom. So he's a danger to the Russian military. And the CIA is doing something super fucking underhanded and he knows about it. And so they want to quiet him before the word gets out that the c a is trafficking cocaine to Russia. So both governments are after him. Ivan Danco is kind of in the middle, not realizing after he gets to America that this is some dirty pool that's being played. And Victor [00:15:00] Lev is a unhinged weirdo that he has to basically track down and try to get the information from without everybody dying. So Ivan NKOs, Tom Hardy his partner played by Jim Pucci in the original Art Riddick. I'm gonna go ahead and do Chris Pratt for this one. He is married to Arnold Schwarzenegger's daughter. And I thought it would be kind of fun to cast him in this and just him putting on like a shitty mustache like he had in one of the Guardians movies. He had a mustache for two. In one of the Avengers movies or something give 'em a shitty mustache, make them like a grizzled Chicago cop that's trying to do one-liners, but they don't land very well against Tom Hardy, who's stoic and just not having any of it. And I think the uncomfortable nature of that relationship would make for actually really funny moments. Thandi: That would be a man Tom Hardy would eat Prat alive, Hobbit: Would eat him a [00:16:00] lot. Absolutely. Pratt would be like, stupidity, dude dance or something, and Tom Hardy would just stare through him be incredible. In the meantime, they're trying to chase down Victor Roli, who is played by the incomparable Peter Stormeyer. Thandi: Oh, perfect. That's basically Peter Stormeyer of his career is playing that guy. Hobbit: He is playing the big old weirdo like Eastern European guy. Don't even give him fucking lines. Let him just make them up and it will be a better movie. Honestly. Peter Stormer, if you're not familiar, he was one of the nihilists in the Big Lebowski. He's, he was the devil in Constantine. He did the, was it the VW commercials for a little bit, right? I. Thandi: Did he Hobbit: I think, yeah, he's, he is done everything. He is incredible. He is such a blast to watch on screen. He'll steal every moment. Then Lieutenant Stops played by Lawrence Fishburne in a horribly underutilized role. They didn't do shit with him in this movie. Thandi: He was just there to be that [00:17:00] guy. wasn't lo, he wasn't Larry Fishburn yet. So But I wanted to give, I wanted to give the little more gravitas to the lieutenant in the fishburn can do don't get me wrong, but I wanted to give the role a little bit more gravitas and still have an actor that can have that kind of intensity that you want from a lieutenant so Denzel all day make him like angry lieutenant. Hobbit: And then the daughter, Kat Manetti is, her mother's name was Manetti. She took her mother's name the daughter of Victor Rostovetti. I went with Mia Kunis, who is actually fluent in Russian and is part Thandi: has the. Hobbit: and she has the look. So I think she would make for a good estranged daughter character to Peter store. Mayor would Thandi: Definitely I could a hundred percent see that, that relationship. Hobbit: And with Chris Pratt with Denzel Washington stylized action movie. I [00:18:00] went with the director Anton Fuqua to set this up and hit it outta the park. Oh, that'd be a good time. And. It's interesting cuz Anton Fuqua, I don't think has ever made like a movie that has fun energy. I think his movies do have lots of energy, but it's all threatening. It's all a little bit more intense, but he has done the straight ahead action film that doesn't have a lot of depth to it, and he's also done the really good. Thoughtful like borderline artistic action film as well. So I think him being able to play with the full speed ahead action film, but have an awkward comedic tone to it, I think would be, he got close with Magnificent seven, like he did almost get there just because of the kind of actors that he had in those roles. This casting, I think he would be impossible not to get some funny moments between Tom Hardy and Chris Pratt, Peter store Mayer, [00:19:00] talking to Mia Kuni Mia Kuni talking to Chris Pratt and Tom Hardy and Chris Pratt flirting a bit, and Tom Hardy being very, not okay with it. And just their, all the relationships I think would be very fun to see on. Thandi: Now, there'd be some fun energy to see them play off of each other. Hobbit: Yeah. Thandi: little intensity there too. Anybody with Tom Hardy? There's gonna be some some intensity. Hobbit: absolutely, and that's why I wanted Tom Hardy is to be the anchor of this, because with those other actors, there is a good chance that this would just get away from the director. But Tom Hardy, he's a really good actor and he is able to play that intense character. And if he. Holds that down. It keeps everybody at a level where the fun can still be there, but it's still held down as a straight ahead action film. So yeah, that is my pitch for for red heat. Thandi: I would enjoy seeing that. I only have one beef, which is that you made old ass Denzel, a lieutenant. [00:20:00] He should be the police captain. Hobbit: That's okay. That is a fair assessment, but also police captains not going out and getting shotgun shot at him on the street. So yeah, he's in the office asking for guns and badges for cops that do things their own way. Thandi: turn in your badge. Hobbit: turn Thandi: You're the best we got. It's a damn shade. But we have rules in this department. Hobbit: I don't like, I don't like how you do things, but Damnit you get results. Yeah. Thandi: Oh, eighties. Captain you're a treasure Hobbit: why isn't there a parody movie just called eighties Police Captain and it's just this like wide open, disgruntled police captain would be fucking incredible. I'd be there for Thandi: because not enough people still smoke cigars maybe. I don't know. But yes, that would be a lot of fun. Hobbit: Because Tom Sellek has retired his mustache and Thandi: I don't know if you've ever watched Blue Bloods, but Tom Sellek is awesome. Tom Sellek makes you want to be Republican. [00:21:00] That's how Hobbit: Oh wow. Thandi: is like a, is like an old like state and respectable white man. You're like, man, you guys have some really good ideas. Tom Sellek is good. He is good at his. If you watched him on Magnum PI and you saw him now, you'd be like, wow, that is quite a transformation. But he is, he's a joy to watch as like the respected you remember back when John McCain was running for president, you saw John McCain. You were like, you know what, I wouldn't, I'm not gonna vote for you, but I respect you, John McCain. I almost felt the same way about Romney. also, like guys who present respectability. Even if I don't agree with their policies, I'm like, oh, you won't be a monster. Especially now in retrospect when actual monsters have taken over the landscape of the right of American politics and yeah. Tom Sellek as a human being, as a callback to a different time. [00:22:00] You only use the N word at home in Tom Sellek's world. It's just you don't take it out into public. Hobbit: I pictured old Tom Sellek as living in a log cabin near a creek with his dog, and he wears like one of those puffy vests on Dewey, slightly chilly mornings as he's out there fishing. Thandi: Yeah. And then he comes down the street and he is you got some problems with your house. I see your roof needs some work. Let's get up there. But I'm sleeping. I'm tired, Tom Sellek. I'll be up on the roof. I'll meet you up there when you get up and Tom Sellek like fixes your roof cuz he's that kind of neighbor that's the kind of Tom Sellek that lives in my mind. Hobbit: That's the one that, those Hallmark movies where there's like the racist neighbor, but he's not actually racist. He just he like treats everybody with respect, but he just doesn't like, like blacks or something. But there's no example of him being shitty at any point to anyone. But that's just like a thrown in character thing. That doesn't make sense. That's [00:23:00] Tom Selleck where. Thandi: Yeah he is Clint Eastwood. If Clint East Wood's characters didn't actually actively complain about yellow people and black people Hobbit: Oh man. Whew. I'm just thinking of grand Torino and some of the moments in that movie were, whew a lot. Thandi: Man it's kind of a shame, this is a little tangent, but it's kind of a shame that all of our our grizzled like old school actors have been become monsters over the course of time. You can be that person. You're old, of course you're that person. That's fine. Just shut the fuck up. Just shut the fuck up and be awesome. You know who I think of all the time because I'm like, man, you are just a treasure on screen and you should be in real movies and not these things produced directly by like conservative interests. James Woods. James Woods is a, an incredible screen presence and the dude's a monster. It's okay to be a [00:24:00] monster. Just be a monster silently and get your paper and continue to entertain us. Hobbit: I don't, I think he kind of showed his hand a little bit in John Carpenter's vampires, cuz he was such a prick in that movie and you're like, he's doing this too. Like James Wood is a good actor, but he's not, that he's not that good of an actor. That was just him. Killing the vampires. That wasn't, he wasn't playing a character at that point. He was like saying racist shit. Like he just smoking a cigar and just being an asshole at everybody. You're like, that's the, that's actually the most real James Wood has ever been on screen Thandi: incredible asshole. He's an incredible asshole, but all right, tangent over my pitch. Hobbit: Okay. All right. So Thandi: got lost in the Hobbit: doing the serious take. The remix is all on you. Thandi: remix. Hobbit: Wiki. Thandi: So my inspiration for this pitch came from Schwarzenegger's line that I mentioned earlier where he is it's okay to like each other. We are not to politicians. And I'm like, but what if they were politicians? And so the angle I'm coming [00:25:00] at this from is because it's not a good movie. I don't have to respect anything. I'm going batshit crazy balls to the wall. My movie takes place in a world where, what if they were politicians? But in this world, politicians are, they're all Chuck Norris. Basically. Every poli every world leader is like Teddy Roosevelt or like Vladimir Putin. They're like, oh, you could probably kill a guy with your bare hands. And in this world, they come into direct conflict. So there's like fisticuffs and tough, everybody's like an eighties tough. With eighties tough guy interactions, direct conflict, like old white dudes and old white ladies beating each other up directly because that's just the tone of this world, that the leader is the strongest person basically. Hobbit: Like Sunday Church every week is the church scene from the Kingsmen. That's okay. Cool. Thandi: Whipping some ass. Yes. So in my skew of this movie what [00:26:00] if they were. Politicians. Basically what happens is that the premier of Russia who is played by John Cena and he is Russian premiere Victor Resta Rust is involved in a situation where he's basically trying to get access to some crypto, and In that conflict, he comes into direct conflict with Mickey Rourke, who is the president of Belarus. Yuri Oga Carav, which was the partner of Schwarzenegger who got killed. And he kills him. He kills him with his bare hands and his best friend, the president of Poland, is out for revenge and what they find out is that the crypto keys are actually in America. The physical keys are in America. They're stored on a server somewhere in America. That's the information he has. So he does like what is kind of disguised as a a [00:27:00] political visit to America. John Cena's character, the Russian Premier does, and the Polish president, Ivan Danko, who is played by. Not doing a Russian accident or a Polish accident at all. Gerard Butler is Ivan Danko. Hobbit: Yes. Thandi: follows the Russian Premier to America and has a coming together scene with a former American president, former president, art Riddick. You son of a bitch. I need help. And they do the predator handshake, that kind of thing. And art Riddick is played by will. Who is doing a very thinly veiled, basically Barack Obama Will Smith is playing action Barack Obama. Hobbit: Yes, Thandi: So they they come. Hobbit: Because just to have a sidequel where it's just a UN meetup and it's just a royal rumble, like that's all it is. It's just royal rumble. Every time the UN gets [00:28:00] together, it's just them in a ring beating the shit out of each other. Thandi: Perfect for the world stage that I have set here. But so they meet in America, do the muscle handshake they bring in the former Secretary of State, Maxine Gallagher, who was Ridley's partner in the first movie, Maxine Gallagher's, played by Charlene Theron, and she's basically doing Hillary Clinton.  Hobbit: Bill wishes  Thandi: They bring in this third to help huge action scene. She is killed by the premiere of Russia. So they get in a huge set peace fight, and he beats the shadow of her and kills her. And then that murder necessitates the involvement of the current presidential administration. Which is as President Lou Donnelly, who is the captain president. Lou Donnelly is Liam Neeson. Basically Liam Neeson doing Joe Biden And he can't help directly, he can't be involved directly. So he gets his vp, his lieutenant to oversee [00:29:00] the the operation of these two world leaders coming together to, to try to take down the Russian premiere in America cover. His vice president Louise Stubs is Aisha, Tyler Hobbit: Yes. Thandi: So they have they have action scenes through DC into some other parts of the country back to dc in their little game of cat and mouse. Ross has American allies his American allies taking the place of the black nationalists or whatever they were in the original movie . Ultranationalist Whites known as the hard lads, and their uh, congressional ally is a person known as Porsche Adams Veld. And so that's their congresswoman that's helping the Ultranationalist Hard lads help Raeli kills ve because she can't actually help him. She fails in, when you fail a Russian, you get murdered. So he, she kills Veed or he kills. And the game of Cat and Mouse [00:30:00] continues, and then it ends with a big ass fight on the steps of the Lincoln Monument with Danko and Riddick tag teaming to beat the shit out of the bigger, stronger rust. And they beat the Russian to premiere to death in front of the Lincoln Monument and And then Not enough. Not enough people get beaten to death in front of the Lincoln Monument. Really like I what I'm saying. So the movie's almost over and, but basically they're like, oh, but what happened to the crypto keys? And then Danko finds out that former President Ridic had the keys all along. He passes them off to the Polish president, who then takes the crypto keys and the money that comes with that back to his country and scene. Hobbit: Yes, I'm here for just, I want. A series of movies to exist in this world that you've created. You can just take whatever eighties action movie and just do a version of it in [00:31:00] this eighties action, hero politician world that you've created. I wanna see it.  Thandi: It would be big fun. And so my directors for this a lot of their brand is just like paring eighties action. Iconography, it drives a lot of what they find humorous. Trey Parker and Matt Stone. I'm thinking like a Team America vibe going through this movie and I was like, man the idea itself is very Trey Parker and Matt Stone. So those are my directors for this project. Hobbit: I am now realizing that the thing that the world has missed is them doing an action movie. They've done Team America with puppets, but I mean like a live action movie. I think the world is ready. I think we're ready for it. Thandi: Yeah, I would love to see, because it'd be a good time. They I don't think they would do a straight action move. They'd still try to parody something and it would be a good. Hobbit: Hell yeah. I'm here for it. Sweet. Red heat. I don't know man, like this could be paired with basically any eighties action movie, especially buddy cop thing. I was thinking like running Scared [00:32:00] Oh, definitely. They could go on vacation. They could go on vacation for 40 minutes with the fellas in the middle of the movie. I've always wanted to see that action movie where you just have two separate movies that come out around the same time and there's just one scene that is in both movies where like they kind of enter into each other. Thandi: kinda walked by each other. How you doing? Hobbit: Or they're chasing their own bad guys, but they end up driving next to each other during a car chase or something and looking at each other like, huh. And then they just trail off into different directions and then the movies continue. But there's just that one shared moment in both movies would be incredible. Thandi: Yeah, that would be incredible. That'd be incredible. I feel like that is the kind of thing that would take place probably in the past 20 years. I feel like there could easily have been a scene like that with the mocking of pop culture generally and also the crossover culture because crossovers bring money. So, yeah, Hobbit: Yeah, true. Very true. Hell yeah. We've got one last little bit to do here, and that is our trailer. [00:33:00] Some people's favorites, some people's least favorite from from the show. I'm gonna get some music together and we'll get that going From Visionary Director Anton Fuqua comes anew. Cold War this summer. Ivan Danko, played by Tom Hardy teams up with Hardened Chicago, detective Art Riddick, played by Chris Pratt as they try to stop the world from being handed a Coke this summer, Peter Storm Air plays Victor Roli, a broken man. Just trying to find a way to. Insert himself into his daughter's life and one big secret Coke deal could be the answer. Watch as Russia and America team up to fight the drug trade and that they also are facilitating a bit. It's kind of a problem this summer. Red heat. Thandi: Iran Contra, Hobbit: [00:34:00] Yeah, part two. Thandi: That is that is good times. I'm not ready for this at all. You know how I used to write all my trailers? I haven't written a trailer in a while, so I am wing it yet again. Hobbit: You wing it a little better than me though. So I still have faith. I used to say that I did the Justin Rowland thing, but I don't think that is a phrase that I can use anymore.  Thandi: Ooh. Yeah. You should probably not say that out loud. Hobbit: that loud . What I mean Thandi: people will start looking at your text messages if you Hobbit: Yeah, right. what I mean is that I just go and then stuff happens. So let's see. So you're doing your wackadoo eighties action hero politician. Version here with Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Thandi: That is correct. Hobbit: Excellent. All right, let me cue up the music. Thandi: The 44 Magnum is the most powerful handgun in the world. No, the most powerful hand weapons in the world are these four fists. [00:35:00] Let's get him from the minds of Trey Parker and Matt Stone coming at you. President Will Smith President. Oh God. Scottish guy, other president. Brain farting and Premier John Cena, Andrew R. Butler are in a three-way conflict to make the world safe for cryptocurrency as they bring the red heat Hobbit: You'll the Scottish guy. I love it. I love it. That's great. all. You have, you've done Russia proud with that retelling of their national movie red heat. Thandi: Yeah, it is a national treasure. It's like the Battleship Potemkin, and then red heat is a [00:36:00] close Hobbit: Yep. Exactly. So that was a really good time. I think we, not that the bar was very high, but I think we actually outdid the original, much like John Carpenter's the Thing. The, sometimes the remake is better than the original. We're Thandi: Yeah, I think we did. Hobbit: jumping rope Thandi: we should do more shitty movies I think. I think we should stop doing these darlings and just start picking stuff from the 99 cent bin. And that's what we do. The pitch max on 90 site, 99 cent bin movies. Hobbit: I don't think that's a bad call, but you do know that path leads to, at some point, doing battlefield Earth.  Thandi: Oh I don't wanna do the Scientologist movie. Hobbit: don't either. But I think honestly there are a few movies where  the premise is decent, but the execution was terrible that we could possibly have a lot of fun putting our own little spin on. So I think we're gonna dig in a little bit deeper into this territory for future episodes. Thandi: It's a new podcast. Hobbit: Woo. Thandi, thank you so much again for [00:37:00] joining me on this adventure through Chicago's Mean Streets This time. Although not Mean Streets, that's a far superior movie. But yeah. Make sure to rate, review, subscribe, all the things you do for podcasts for this show. We are gonna be releasing regularly, so you can definitely expect a lot more weird and fun content coming your way from smack my pitch up. Make sure to check out all the other shows on the network at guipodcast.com. Make sure to check out Thandi's other show. Thandi: My handle is Jonathan Blade. It's about the musings of internet citizen Jonathan Blade, who happens to be me. Me, Hobbit: Me. So check all that stuff out and we'll find you next time for another episode. I'm Michael Hobbit Thandi: and I'm Thandi. Hobbit: and uh, you just got this pitch smacked out of ya. Thandi: Yeah, just like your communism bitches. Hobbit: Get to the remake. Now that was terrible.

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 94 - Fatal Attraction: Stuck In Crazy Transcript at the bottom of show notes Hobbit and Thandi visit one of the greatest sexy thrillers of all time as they try to suppress their... Fatal Instinct Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "A Darker Heart" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries   Transcript: SMPU - Fatal Attraction === Hobbit: [00:00:00] Hello Geeks and welcome to another amazing episode of Smack My Pitch Up, the podcast that reboots remakes does everything. I lost track of that. Thandi: the things. Yes, Hobbit: All the things, all the redos of stuff that we have come to it's all a blend at this point. I love it when it's like a, it's a Torch Pass movie sequel reboot. That they do now, where it's technically a sequel, but it's also brand new. It. Thandi: there to make money. Yes. Love it. Hobbit: Oh, it's where everything's got sub categoried so much that they don't even make sense when you try to explain what it is now. It used to be just a remake or a reboot, and then that's it. Thandi: got one of the old guys and Timothy Chalamet, and we're calling it a re-imagining sequel. What was it? Legacy. Lega Sequel is the big thing now. Hobbit: Legacy . Yeah, absolutely. And we see it with the Ghostbusters is a good one. Creed is another one oh, a good one was the Ben Stiller Owen [00:01:00] Wilson, Thandi: Oh Zoolander two Hobbit: no not Zoolander two, the car one a Starsky and Hutch Thandi: oh. Hobbit: where at the end the original guys showed up and sold them the car and it was a, yeah, I don't know. 2021 Jump Street was the same way Thandi: Yeah, except Hobbit: it's oh, we were in Jump Street. Yeah, that was a really fun film. Speaking of a fun film no, this is a good film the one that we're talking about this episode, but I wouldn't go so far to say fun. It's hitting a lot of fear points. for for men, I guess. So It's definitely morality tale Thandi: it is a morality it's a straight up morality play, and that's fine. Oh, and by the way, The other gentleman is Mike. I'm Thandi. We love you. Hobbit: Oh, cool. Yeah, the intro stuff that we normally do at the beginning got so excited to jump Thandi: Yeah. No it's so, I love this movie. Like I hadn't seen it in 20 years and I was into it [00:02:00] like I was in the movie theater eating popcorn. I was into it. Like I was talking to myself and going, oh, no, when I had all the anxiety of a dude watching a dude just do stupid shit, making stupid dude mistakes. Oh, it was awesome. I thought this was a really good movie. I didn't remember that. It was a really good, like the, I thought the cinematography was good. I thought that the acting was good. The storytelling was interesting. I was all in on. Hobbit: and I feel they didn't overexplain anything. It was just the information that you needed to get like through that part of the plot. It. I'm trying to over decorate the movie with a bunch of additional people or side. I was trying to think of side characters that I would need to cast possibly while watching this movie. And there's only four other people in this movie, beside the main Thandi: that's a, it's a very small story. Hobbit: ke Yeah, absolutely. But that's all it needs to be. It doesn't detract by keeping it small at all. It actually keeps it a much [00:03:00] tighter movie. And this is just under two hours. It's not a short movie. It's a standard. Thandi: yeah. It's a full story, but it kept me engaged the entire time. And, you know what and big up to Adrian Lynn for doing the same movie over and over again for 40 years and making it pretty great every time. Hobbit: I'm the amount of sexy thrillers, that Michael Douglass has been in is just incredible to me. That j there was just a period of time, there was like a 10 year little spot. Michael Douglas was just like onscreen fucking Thandi: people. Like they don't do, they don't do this kind of movie anymore for probably years, but he is manhandling, just manhandling what's his CoStar's name? Glen Close. He's manhandling Glen, close. It is disgusting and awesome. Hobbit: There is a scene where Glen closed, like pulls down her shirt into her first reveal of her nipple. And I swear in my [00:04:00] head, Michael Douglas went, ow, as he even and jumped on it. Just ready to roll. Just aggressive fucking in this Thandi: Yeah, no it's, it is a sight to behold. Like I said, they don't make movies like this anymore. Sexy thrillers get made sometimes, but as far as like people pawing each other, that doesn't happen like that anymore. Hobbit: No I think the most recent pawing at each other sex scene that I saw was in Bros.  Thandi: Oh, do they have something like that? Hobbit: something, but it was actually playing at the aggressive sex scenes a bit where they're like, Shoving their feet in each other's face and not in a sexy way, like pressing their head against the wall kind of thing. Very funny. Very Thandi: love. Hobbit: But yeah. One thing I do miss about these sexy thrillers and something that just like you said wouldn't play today, is that morality aspect of don't cheat on your wife, cuz she might be fucking crazy. And the rule that we learned as teenagers from like [00:05:00] the, our older brothers and older friends. There are some things that come with, as they said, and the time sticking your dick in crazy is that you don't know what kind of results may come Thandi: That was the saying, but as somebody from the restaurant industry, I had to, it couldn't help it. It was part of my lifestyle. Hobbit: look, everybody at a certain point in their life needs to have a whore phase male or female in between everybody needs. I think it's important absolutely to. Really explore what you like, what you don't like, what you're willing to handle, and what you're not willing to handle. I think that's a super important thing. There's no shame in it whatsoever. Ever. I've had my time, my friends have had their time. Good for fucking them. But yeah, occasionally you'll run across somebody that , oops, that was a bad idea. And this is definitely that Thandi: and it's the, and you knew. once she started spitting her game, and I was like, man, Alex has mad game, but it's a little bit scary. Before they even got [00:06:00] into stuff, I was like, oh man this is way aggressive. This might not be a good scene for you, man, knowing it's not gonna be a good scene for 'em, but yeah. Ooh. Hobbit: When the moment hits where suddenly, and I think it was very deftly written, the turn in the conversation from it being very light. Nobody's saying anything flirtation to being overt flirtation, where they discuss basically who's making the call on which way this goes. And Michael Douglas says, that's definitely your call, not mine. And I'm like, bitch, you're married like . What do you mean? That's her call. She's got nothing to lose in Thandi: At that point, I think he was just having fun with it. He was like, oh yeah, we're gonna fuck. And she's oh yeah, no, we are, we're gonna fuck. And he's okay, Hobbit: No, he was playing with it like the night before. What you know is gonna be a long day at work and you start playing with the idea of calling out. But you know, in your head you're eventually gonna call out. Like you've already made that determination in your brain, but you haven't really admitted it to yourself yet. That's the flirtation that he is doing with [00:07:00] fucking, like he knows. That's where it's going. 100%. But he is no, I'm a, I'm good husband. I wouldn't do that. But what Would it be like? He already knows it's happening. He already knows it's going now even with Glen Close, like I haven't decided. Yes, bitch. Yes, you have. You have decided. What do you mean? No, I haven't decided Thandi: Yes, she has decided. That's one of the the thing, the old pieces of wisdom too, is that she knows beforehand and it's on you to f it up, but in his case, effing it up was actually going and doing the thing. Hobbit: Yep. And. I was curious to see how it played for me as an adult. The turn from it being this mutual decision to hook up and fool around. That was like, he's married, he can't turn in anything and everybody knows to it being this weird stalker kind of story and man for it didn't age poorly at all. I feel like there was, it felt very genuine. Once you're in it, it's a different story than when you're just [00:08:00] hypothetically discussing it. Thandi: Yeah. So for me the thing that was striking because a lot of the movies very naturalistic, except for Glenn Clo, seems like a cartoon character. If I hadn't engaged with people like Glenn Close, I would be like, man, she's playing a cartoon character, but she's playing people that I've met. This is a, perhaps not where it goes, but this is a very understandable relationship situation cuz I've seen it. Hobbit: Yeah, I have. and yeah, this is definitely a turned up to 11 version. Great. But it's not out of the realm of possibility. It works. It's not like a fast and furious movie where nothing makes sense. The human relationships here fit the way that they should to make sense. So that being said, let's ruin it. Let's let's take this movie word we're very happy with that I don't really see Thandi: Yeah, cuz I feel like we can only ruin it like the the genre has been done to death at this point. [00:09:00] It was really interesting finding any angle to get a grip on. But yeah. I love this movie enough that I think it stands on its own whether we ruin it or. Hobbit: This is really one of the top three sexy thrillers, right? There's like basic instinct of fatal attraction and then maybe what, nine and a half weeks? Thandi: Yeah. So my favorite before this, because I don't watch sexy thrillers all the time, I never did was unfaithful, which is also an Adrian Lynn movie from like 2002 or something. It made me have a chub for Diane Lane until now, even as Ma Kent, I was like  Hobbit: diane Lane is aging well. She is. She's doing a very good job there. And. Yeah, those sexy thrillers. There was a time in my life that I went through all of 'em. I like Jade was watching nine and a half weeks, of course. Basic, like I what was the one Body Heat? Do you remember? Body Heat, I think. Was that Melanie Griffith? Was it, was that? I can't remember. But yeah, th there was just a series of sexy thrillers and then that kind of [00:10:00] tweaked into it being more of the murdery aspect than the sexy aspect. And that's where you start getting into Seven and taking lives and suspect zero. And all these like gritty crime thrillers, I feel are definitely a bastard child of the sexy thriller. Thandi: But you know, the sexy thriller was, it was cheap to make, so it dominated like the nineties. It was this sexy thriller in courtroom dramas and just stuff that you didn't have to spend a whole lot of money on. Sets or places that weren't just people's houses or, yeah it was a good time in cinema because the focus wasn't on the spectacle. You had some interesting scripts and some interesting characters, Hobbit: And that's why I'm interested to see what we're exactly gonna do with this. We, if you didn't listen to the last episode, we have tweaked to the format a little bit where instead of four different takes of the movie we're talking about, one of us gets the re reboot or remake version thing that we think might actually be the best bet. For the film and one of us gets the remix version, the [00:11:00] wackadoo, weird, fully out of the box. Take on this. Sometimes those two versions are actually pretty close as far as whether or not we wanna see these versions or not. And sometimes they're wildly different, but you get the real take Thandi: I got the real. Hobbit: So I'm interested to see if you're going with that sexy thriller vibe. If you're trying to go more modern. Take what are we doing? Thandi: So I am going full on sexy thriller. And with that as a thing, I had to find something to latch onto to make it interesting. So something that I noticed in Fatal Instinct, or sorry, fatal Attraction, haha, is that they were really casually racist. A couple times making fun of Asian people, cuz that's the race that was in the movie. But and then in addition to that, I watched this other thriller that was from the affair thriller that was from the early seventies called play Misty For me, Hobbit: Yeah. Thandi: really, it wasn't racist at all, but [00:12:00] it had some really interesting relations to others in the movie because it was. Early seventies, so they were like, oh, let's put all these people in the movie. But they weren't people, they were like set dressing. So it had a black person and another black person and a gay person. But they were just so they could have these things in the movie to be like, oh, what is America's a melting pot? But they weren't important or really part of the movie or addressed as individual beings of, they were just people that were set dressing for the movie. So I wanted to address what race relations are like now with the from the point of view of white affluence, because those are the people that are in the original movie. These affluent white people like living their wonderful lives. So I wanted to have these affluent white people living their wonderful lives, and I wanted to have race as a component that is not directly addressed, but I wanted [00:13:00] to see in real time. Basically having microaggressions, basically being casually racist in a way that people do not like, oh, I hate these people, or whatever. Just the way people do when they're comfortable and intimate. That kind of casual racism. I want to see that throughout the movie, but with it never really being directly addressed, just something that hangs over the movie. So in this modern version, this modern. On fatal Instinct. Dang it. On Fatal Attraction Hobbit: No. Fatal Instinct is a movie and if I remember correctly, Thandi: a parody Hobbit: isn't that like a, it's a parody movie. Yeah, I believe so. Yeah. Thandi: So my director for this version is Michael Moen, who directed the Voyeurs. I don't know if you saw that last year, a really. Hobbit: Oh, okay. I know what you're talking. I hadn't had the chance to see it, but I know what you're Thandi: So it is half of a really good movie. If they had [00:14:00] stopped at the Twist, then it would be a really good movie. But at The Twist, there's like a whole half movie left and it's stupid after that, Hobbit: Oh Thandi: But it's a sexy thriller and I enjoyed that first half of it. So that's the director I'm going for there. And for my story, it's mostly the same beats, but we bring in some things that are a little bit different. So instead of Stuart PanIN being the. We're bringing in Michael Pena as Jimmy the Stewart Pan character, Hobbit: Okay. Thandi: as his wife Hildy. We have Mabel K, who was Noora in Wakanda forever. And their interaction with the couple, the Dan Gallagher and Beth Gallagher, the husband and wife, the lawyer, couple, the lead and his wife. What happens inside the circle of trust, which is the casual racism that happens inside of the circle of trust, but it's not really, it doesn't look like racism because it's inside the circle of trust. [00:15:00] Everybody is accepting of what's going on there. If you watch it from the outs, if you see it from the outside, then it's yucky. It's it's like you hanging out with Steven or me and saying some things that are, it's funny in the moment because it's us, not racism. And not inappropriate in that moment, but if somebody from the outside sees it, it's yucky. I've had this conversation about just being in podcasting. Is that something you have to be considerate of, is who's listening your audience? It's the clarity of message is that there are jokes that, yeah, like you said, we could make with one another because the intention is incredibly clear to one another. Hobbit: We know each other well enough to know where the line is and what is meant by what is Thandi: Yeah, I've had the circle of trust conversation with women where I'm like you, where I've said, where I've said things in front of people that I would say in front of a woman that I'm very close with. That's completely inappropriate to say under that context. And it's just something you have to learn. But we're seeing this as [00:16:00] observers and we're like, eh, and it's just part of the That's something that's happening in modern day with social media, with the. Remote based relationships that we have is people are starting to misunderstand like where that line is as far as comfort level and what you're should be able to say in mixed company versus close Hobbit: That there's some things that you need to change your clarity a little bit depending on your Thandi: Yeah. Every conversation's not for everybody. Hobbit: exactly, that's why you should, there's some places you can't say fuck it work and that's reason. Thandi: Yeah, Hobbit: My job's pretty okay with it, but But for my leads for my affluent white couple, we have Jake Gillen Hall as Dan Gallagher nice. Thandi: as Beth Gallagher we have Bree Larson, and as Alex, we have Lupita Nego, which brings in like just a whole bunch of. Not in your face, [00:17:00] but like implicit racism because Leedia Nigo is the one who Jake Gillen Hall cheats with. I also wanted to change the dynamic of that a little bit, where Jake Gillen Hall is. Not just an innocent dummy. He's actually he's trying to pursue a thing. He's trying to see how long he can make this go, not realizing that this person's crazy and then it's too late. It's not two days. And he is oh, this bitch is crazy. It's like a couple weeks maybe where he is trying to like, oh, I can make this, I can make, I can juggle this, I can make this work. Oh no, she's crazy. and In the scene, like it's gonna have a lot of the same beats. So when the scene, they're gonna sell their, oh, we're gonna try ourselves to sell our house. And when Alex comes to the house and Beth meets Alex, and after Alex leaves and she sees that that Dan, Jake Gillen Hall is very uncomfortable, she's she thinks it's because it's a pretty black girl. She's I know what you did in college. I know that you were into that in college or whatever. And when she's talking about what [00:18:00] he was into in college, he does this. This mock black woman accent, Adam. Hobbit: No. Oh, no Thandi: In inside their home is part of the circle of trust, but stuff that people don't see and you don't really see in movies like that either. But I want to expose that kind of thing, not as not as a pointed part of the movie, just as an uncomfortable background element that goes through the entire. then most of the story beats are going to be the same. Beyond that one thing that I will change is that her parents will be a little bit more involved as affluent whites. And when they find out that Dan has been cheating with this black, this African black woman the level that they're unpleased and the way that they express that is going to be Hobbit: Ooh. Yeah. Oof. A fog. Like a fart in a room. Just hover it in. Thandi: so so because her parents are more intrinsic to the plot there I've casted [00:19:00] them for Beth's mother, I have Michelle Pfeiffer, and for Beth's father, I have John Corbett. And if you don't know who John Corbett is, he was Aiden from Sex in the City. Chris from Northern Exposure, which is how I knew. And then Ian from my big Fat Greek wedding, and he's just a tall, handsome white guy, even it's in the sixties. He's a tall, handsome, white guy. Michelle Pfeiffer is still beautiful and older, and I wanted to like you to see the affluence just as like looking at these people. Oh, affluent whites, so Hobbit: Yeah I love trying to differentiate between being a white myself understanding that I do differentiate myself between that and affluent white, which has a why at the beginning, the white. White. Yeah. That it's a slight different inflection there. That does mean a lot . It does quite a bit. Thandi: And that Hobbit: and in, yeah, that's in the circumstance? Yeah, in the circumstance. I think it's just the idea of [00:20:00] who grew up at a level of maybe income or status that they. Need or maybe desire hung out with non-whites, like actually have experience interacting with people that didn't look exactly like them or have the same experiences as them. And so don't have that like absence of experience that creates awkward social situations on occasion. Just out of. Lack of depth of knowledge of how to act around people, which is literally just like yourself, but don't try to cater to, and then you become more awkward. That's like the white affluence things like in Get Out that I voted for Obama three times. Why was that relevant to this conversation? Like why is that something you just blurred out? Brother, man. Yeah. That If you wanna see a perfect example of this, look at early television interviews [00:21:00] with Quentin Tarantino. When there's a black cast member with him during the interview he starts talking Thandi: starts to code Hobbit: like he, yeah, he code switches my man. Then I might like, he totally changes his inflections and it's jarring like it's so bad. I'm really glad that he got outta the habit. It's really bad. Yeah, it's. So, yeah I love those moments that speak to that. That's great. Thandi: And the uh, the only other thing I want to put in here for that pitch is that I want it to be old school sexy, and I want Jake Gillen Hall to grab two big pans of la Pita NGO's Sweet, juicy can, and focus on that is like an objectification of that sweet, juicy can. Much different than what his wife, Bree Larson has going on. And yeah, just as part of the the underlying discomfort, he's objectifying this big black ass [00:22:00] as part of his thing. But I want very little of it to be spoken out loud. I just want it to be like, felt throughout the. Hobbit: I think that's gonna really translate better anyway than trying to work in dialogue to explain that. No I think showing it is gonna work a lot more effectively For sure. Thandi: And that's the pitch. Hobbit: sweet. I'm into it. It's taking aspects it's almost like an homage to the classy, sexy thriller the classic sexy thriller without trying to re. Modern take with a nice deft handoff from the classics so great into it. I am not doing that. I am being way more overt in the way that I'm approaching not just race, but also otherness, I guess in this conversation. With Fatal Attraction being the starting point I was interested to. Something that was troubling for me with Fatal Attraction [00:23:00] is rooting for anyone. The only innocent here is the wife. Like she, she didn't do anything. She didn't deserve this. She, for everything we've seen in the film, is a devoted and loving wife that appreciates her husband and doesn't try to start fights. Isn't a banshee or terrible or hasn't driven him into the arms of another woman. He's just a scumbag that took advantage of an opportunity. And of course Alex the character Alex is a psychopath. So I wanted to Thandi: She's so Hobbit: to like, change the direction on who we're actually rooting for, have one of the main characters as somebody that we root for. But to do that I had to really just determine what would give us that reason to root for a person. And I think it would be th this idea of otherness. Is discussed a little bit in Fatal Attraction. This is a single woman that is willing to sleep with a married man. And so therefore she's treated as disposable by the married [00:24:00] man and she calls him out and She did make assumptions that weren't there for sure. But what I wanted to do is flip it on its head. Actually, this was inspired by. News about what is it Matt slap the conservative icon that there's reports and text messages that back it up that he apparently groped a man in a car couple years ago and was called out for it. And this is like hard. Yeah. And this is the story he told time and time again. So I thought maybe inspired. Switching the lens that actually Dan Gallagher is a conservative politician Opposed to a lawyer. And his friend Jimmy played by Stewart kin, is actually just his lawyer that works on the campaign and stuff with him. And, Dan is a closeted gay man. He has a wife. Didn't want to put a kid in, in a dangerous position in this situation. So, and also gay man with a beard, they got [00:25:00] a greyhound. So that's crazy was the random person picking your kid up from school scene by the. Yeah, that Talk about a fucking power move. Power move. It was like, your kid is completely safe. Had a great time. Took her on a rollercoaster. She kissed me on the cheek like this. Thandi: But also that's a scene that would never work in modern movies cuz you couldn't get into the school to get somebody's kid just random. Hobbit: Hell, that's one thing that immediately flipped in my brain when that scene came up, is that, how did she just come and grab a kid? It's oh, it's the eighties. That's, yeah. They weren't checking IDs and shit at Thandi: And the kid was like, okay, Hobbit: the kid. The kid being like, come with me. Sure. Great. And the eighties parents just wanted to get rid of their kids, take her great. Thandi: More time to drink for us. Hobbit: Yeah, right. So Dan is a closeted conservative politician. His wife Beth is. It's not openly discussed [00:26:00] between them, but it, she's pretty aware of his proclivities. She just chooses to ignore them. She appreciates the lifestyle that she's been given is completely content to have her own trists outside of the marriage um, and let him have his, and it's just an unspoken kind of thing that they have between the two of them. That the core thing is to make sure that they're not caught. They are seen as a core family value type. Thandi: Hillary and Bill action. Hobbit: A little bit kinda a little bit of that energy. And then we have let's see. The Ellen, yeah the daughter that's a Greyhound, that's just a dog. So instead of picking up the dog from school, it'll be from like the kennel they kept it at while they were out of town, like doing politician stuff. And then took the dog to the dog park, , like doing doggy fun things. Thandi: Who frolics with the side piece in public.  Hobbit: Yeah, that's, ooh, that's rough. So this story is less so about [00:27:00] the cheating aspect and more about the realization that Dan and Alex, I don't even have to change the name for the man that he has a trist with, doesn't realize that Dan is a conservative politician when they have this experience. and it's shortly after this experience when Dan's in town in DC has this tryst, with this dude. He lives nearby, maybe like Baltimore or something, relatively close, but not in DC. And then he sees Dan's face on the TV as he's elected, like he's a, been elected or or his position. That's where Alex decides to have some fun with this man that he had real feelings for and is against. Gay marriage calls it an abomination, gays are grooming that whole fucking party line shit. And it's infuriating. But he also like, still has feelings for him. So it's this confliction. So he's threatening to out him, to tell the press and all this stuff. And he has pictures of them together on his phone and all this stuff. And so Dan is a [00:28:00] mess. This can ruin everything, can ruin his political career ruin this very intentionally curated marriage that he has. Oh, let me name these people. Actually. This is directed by John Cameron Mitchell, Thandi: Who Hobbit: who is best known for headwind in the angry inch. Also the. Movie How to Talk to Girls at Parties, which if you haven't seen, is based on a Neil Gaiman and Short Story, and it's a sci-fi weird piece directed at episode of Glow and a bunch of other TV shows as well. Great director. I really wanted a queer director to speak to, like the experience of this closeting and like this whole story really. And Dan Gallagher is gonna be played by Matt Bomer if you are unfamiliar. He was the super spy in the Chuck TV series. Back in the day. He's was also in Magic Mike one and two he was in the magnificent seven Nice guys boys in the Thandi: Hold on. I thought that Chuck was Shazam. Hobbit: Chuck is Shazam but his college roommate that was the super spy [00:29:00] that is who he gets mistaken for. He he shows up and then gives Chuck the thing or whatever. That's Matt Bomber. He's the smooth spy guy that, yeah, the actual spy. Yeah. . Then we've got Alex. I wanted to really punch the otherness of this story by not just having like a queer actor and visibly not code switching. Very clearly gay, but also I wanted a Latino actor as well, so I went with Wilson Cruz, and if you're unfamiliar, he's in. Star Trek Discovery as one of the doctors. He was in Party Monster as Angel and he was Ricky in my so called Life way back in the day as well. Great actor I think would nail this role as just like a kind of vindictive scorned lover that is trying to get back at this conservative politician that he had a tryst. Thandi: Him being Latino works for that whole kind of [00:30:00] thing too. Hobbit: And just the whole party line in general would be also just another condemning factor, and I want a line like that as it's bad enough that you slept with a man, but he had to be, he had to be Mexican. He's no, he is Puerto Rican, whatever. Just dismissive kind of energy from Beth Gallagher, the wife who's played by Amanda sef. Thandi: Nice. She was actually on my shortlist for wife. Hobbit: yeah, I think she can play like waspy mean affluent white woman very well. And I just, great actress. I think she would have a lot of fun in that role. Jimmy is the lawyer friend that he goes to that has some experience in like family law stuff, and he's Hey, how does this work out? There's no baby nobody's pregnant in this version. It's more about some information about his governmental dealings that he let slip during the tris that he had and how liable he would be if that came out if that was protected in any way. And so he's going to his friend who's played by Jared Carmichael, who I was not very familiar with [00:31:00] until the Golden Globes this last Sunday where he host. and was brilliant wonderful and said super fucking edgy shit that like pissed off a lot of people and have a lot of respect for that. And I would I was like, you know what? You get in my movie cuz you were Thandi: he came out. So I'm sure that he would be all about something, a project like this. Hobbit: absolutely. And he's very funny as well. And I want this, and in that same conversation of otherness is that there's this conserve. Politician that's relying on what he considers a friend is really employee that this black lawyer that is one of the very few people that knows that he's gay because Jared Carmel, Jimmy is also gay and is openly so like it's fine, but it's also like they work together. It's like one of that's the comfortable in the room conversation that this conservative dude feels like he can be. More gay in the room with Jimmy than he could be normally, because that's the [00:32:00] one connecting factor they have with one another, but he's also still racist. So it's like they, they never really get to a point of actually being friends. Cuz Jimmy is like, no, I know you're a racist. We're not friends. It's just I'm not gonna out you because I know how fucked up that is. I'm not gonna do that. So you're safe. But then there's a, the boss. Arthur from the original was played by Fred Gwynne, and I wanted Kyle McLaughlin to play the boss. He actually was in a movie based on tiger King, , Joe versus Carol. He played Howard Baskin in that, and John Cameron Mitchell played Joe Exotic in that movie. So they have a connecting. But the twist, the main twist of this is that at the end or the midway point where in the original he tells his wife that he had an affair, that she's pregnant, that she's stalking him, and it's this whole ordeal. That's the turn where now Dan isn't the [00:33:00] aggressor in trying to get Alex to fuck off. It's the. The wife takes this role of that's the surprise in the story. The twist is that she's known all along, he's gay. She doesn't give a shit. Don't take away my quality of life. Don't ruin this for me. Yeah. And those, so she gets way darker and way more fucked up about trying to get this stranger to leave her family alone. And that's where the, it almost like a tag team in a wrestling ring, like your turn and she goes after him. Thandi: Yeah that's beautiful. And actually I think in a practical marriage of a power couple marriage, I think that's how it works. The face doesn't do the public assaults. It's the other shrew person who actually goes out and takes care of business. Hobbit: Yep. So at the end of it, this is a love affair gone wrong. A conservative politician that is trying to cover their tracks. As a hypocrite, that is what they pretend to stand against. [00:34:00] And a trophy wife, beard wife that is willing to kill to keep her comfort. So I'm loving this. I'm actually, I'm loving this. How does it shake out? It shakes out basically that the final scene in the original movie where she sneaks into the house to to kill them and stuff. It's. It's actually that, oh, how do I put it? The vital proof of their tryst that was on his phone was stolen by the wife and brought back to their house. So Alex isn't going in for revenge, is going in to get their phone that they have the locate feature on, and that's how they find out that it was taken to get their phones. So they have proof to try to blow it all outta the water. That's the way that I'm safe is to. Tell people about this. So then if anything happens to me, they know who to look at. And so then it's the fight to the death in the house. And I don't want this to necessarily be like I think as unfortunate as [00:35:00] it is, cuz we are rooting for Alex at this point. I'm making Alex the person that you want to succeed. I want the reality of the situation to be that's not how it works. And that like during the struggle Alex is killed in their house and they try to play it off as a burglar like somebody that came into the house. Yeah, exactly. And then you throw that otherness around as a final fuck you. At the end of it is that like even after all this shit, you can still just throw out ads, just some Puerto Rican and then the police will be like, yep, that we've heard of that before. And dismiss it is exactly that. Don't look into it that. But I would love to have something at the end where the phone gets into the right hands. So even though Alex dies at the end, the information, the outs, Dan and his wife for being pieces of shit gets recovered and actually gets out or it's alluded to. Thandi: Like the end of the Watchman movie. Hobbit: A similar kind of vibe to it. Yeah, for sure. Thandi: I'm really into that pitch. I like [00:36:00] that. Hobbit: I'm actually really surprised there aren't that many. There, there just aren't that many stories about conservative politicians that are closeted, trying to protect their image. There's just not a lot of that out there. And it's such a every like six months or every year, we have another story of that happening. Thandi: Yeah, I think mostly it's just a tacit agreement because these male sex workers make a lot of money off of these guys and if you're a professional, you keep your secrets. Hobbit: Yeah, fair enough. Yeah. But in the circumstance, I thought about the sex worker ed vibe as well for this, but I wanted it to be genuine, not he fucked me so good. I love him. Now, can I like ? I'll give a, like in, we just saw True Romance recently where Christian Slater. Fucks her so good that she's only three days into being a call girl. And she decides I quit. Let's get married. I didn't want to give the conservative politician that kind of energy at all. But yeah, so that's my version [00:37:00] of fatal Attraction is that the fatality was actually to the person that made the mistake of hooking up with a conservative. Thandi: Which is how that works Hobbit: That's how that works. Yeah. . And also moral of the story is be with somebody that considers you, they're equal. Not somebody that looks down upon your station. Thandi: or is just fetishizing you. Hobbit: Ugh. Yeah. Thandi: was somebody who has not worked through their own issues. Ugh. Hobbit: Ugh. Thandi: I guess if that was the thing, we'd never, none of us would ever be with anybody. Hobbit: Or for clarification, or is working through their own issues. Like it's a constant, continual process. But yeah, you gotta put the work in though. So great. Yeah, I think these are both really actually possible versions of this. Mine is almost not fatal attraction anymore, but it's still hitting those main beats. It's like the dawn of the dead remake. The only thing that, the only thing there is the mall is Thandi: For the fun pitches inspired by is what we're [00:38:00] going for, just generally. Hobbit: Yeah. Let's, if we got just a little bit left, we're talking about our trailers that we gotta do now. So yeah I actually wrote out my trailer this time, Thandi: I did not. So we'll Hobbit: Oh, nice. Nice little flip here. Okay, let me get us queued up here. We decided we're gonna use the same track for both of ours cuz it's a perfect, like sexy thriller back backtrack here. Here we go. Tandy, with your version of Fatal Attract. Thandi: Happy wife, happy life, but he's gotta have it. Lawyer Dan Gallagher, played by Jake Gillen Hole has everything except that. Sweet. Sweet. Can he craves. So he meets Alex Force, played by Lapita Nego, and ruins his own life. Join Bree Larson as his wife, Beth Gallagher, Michael Pena as his buddy Jimmy, and as best mother and father, Michelle Pfeiffer and John Corbett as they [00:39:00] try to navigate a crushing affair. He gave it all up for the nookie that sweet nookie. And it will destroy him unless it destroys her. First, it's Michael Moens, fatal Attraction. She will not be ignored. Hobbit: Yes. Excellent. . All right. Let's see how much I can screw up mine here. So I'm using the same backing track. I tried to use some punning in here so I apologize and ahead of time for how stupid it Thandi: Make it fun. Hobbit: Woo. this is definitely a more fun version with John Cameron Mitchell at the helm. You can't help but have it a little bit more. Ridiculous and big and a little silly. So here we go, man. Lives by the rule of law and his own morality. This March, Dan Gallagher wrestles with both as he [00:40:00] tastes forbidden fruit. Little did he know this fruit bites back with his political career on the line. Dan will do anything to stop this fatal attraction starring Matt Bomber Wilson Cruz and Amanda Seyfried. Thandi: So, so was the the double entendre Attentional or Hobbit: Yeah. Th this fruit bite's back definitely was part of it, and I was like sitting there being like, ah, it's a lot. No, I, it's the self ownership, it's like I'm allowed to say it like it's okay.  Thandi: It's awesome. Hobbit: Cool. So yeah, this is this is. Really fun take on Fatal Attraction. I appreciate all the listeners for sticking around for it. Two episodes in a row. Who knew we'd be capable of Thandi: a possible thing. Yes. Hobbit: Yes. We'll be trying to make it a threepeat here next week with another episode of smack My Pitch Up. Thandi, thank you so much again for joining me on this fucking escapade. Here Thandi: thank you, sir. Hobbit: Make [00:41:00] sure to rate reviews, subscribe all the things you do for podcasts. Check us out at GUIpodcast.com for links to our social media and other shows on the network. You can hear coming I believe last week as of when this drops the final regular release of Geeks under the Influence we'll have dropped. And yeah, that's gonna be a tear jerker for sure. And a lot of drunken revelry as well, so Thandi: Yeah. Yeah. But you know, Bigger and better things. Bigger Hobbit: There's a whole lot Thandi: everybody's still here. We're all still playing. Hobbit: also playing and there will be occasional releases on the main feed. Still that's not, we're gonna every so often meet up and have our hahas. And and do a little like free play or something or special event kind of thing. So definitely keep, subscribe to that mainstream as well. But yeah, also check out TeePublic for the new smack. My pitch up design or newish smack my pitch up design. The lethal weapon inspired design with Thandi and I  Thandi: look great.[00:42:00]  Hobbit: That's a fun design. I'm really happy how that turned Thandi: pretty inspired. Hobbit: So, so inspiring that you almost didn't get into an amusement park with it. Thandi: Yeah it's Danny Glover. Don't you recognize Danny Glover? Yeah. Hobbit: I wish I was a fly on the wall to hear this. The reasoning with the security that it's just a picture of a gun on a shirt. It doesn't mean that you're like aggressing Thandi: I had to pitch the show. I had to pitch our show to the people at the amusement park. I pitched it well enough. They let me in. So Hobbit: pull it up on Spotify. No, see it's real. It's right here. Oh, that's so Thandi: I don't get it. Hobbit: So, yeah, you try your hand at getting into an amusement park with our shirt and let us know how it turns out. Pitch smacked on social medias for the most part, hashtag us pitch smacked, and we'll see you next time. I'm Mike the Hobbit, Thandi: and I'm Thandi. Hobbit: and you just got your pitches smacked all up and Thandi: It's a swing and a pitch and it's smacked out of the park. Hobbit: Well done. Well done.

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 93 - The Rock: Jared Leto Ripped In Half Hobbit and Thandi are finally back! They head to Alcatraz Island to remake and reimagine the 1996 Michael Bay action extravaganza, The Rock Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" "Assasins" and "Bustin Loose" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries   Transcript: SMPU - THE ROCK [00:00:00]  Hobbit: [00:01:00] Hello geeks and welcome to a long overdue episode of Smack My Pitch Up, the show that reboots, remakes, reimagine sequels, sidequels and adapts some of your favorite and least favorite properties from film, television, and what have you. And Thandi we're back. Thandi: We're Beck, Winick. Hobbit: Yay. Thandi: Ha ha. Hobbit: Thank you so much to our longtime listeners for being patient with us.  There's been a lot of moving and shaken going on over at the network   And also figuring out how to get all the stuff we're doing to fit and so we can be more consistent with our releases.   And so for this episode, this is a slight tweak on our previous format   That's gonna make this a much tighter show   Which allows us to record more consistently. So hopefully moving forward, we're gonna have like weekly releases for you of this Thandi: that's a good. Hobbit: It is a great thing. So   This show previously was around an hour or two, an hour 15.   We are shortening that by one of us each week doing a real take on the remake   [00:02:00] And one of us doing the remix, weirdo outside the box, take on it. So we're just, instead of four versions of the same movie, we're taking it down to two. So it's a lot more manageable, I think, honestly, it's gonna be a more fun show to have it a little bit tighter like that. Thandi: Yeah, because everybody likes it  Hobbit: tight. Yeah. And speaking of tight   We are going into a tight action   Comedy. I mean Thandi: Yeah, but only an action comedy in the vein of the idea that all nineties movies fall into this genre. Hobbit: when Sean Connery goes was it, losers? Think about  Thandi: go home and to fuck the prom queen or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sean Connery is just rubbing his balls all over this movie, just spreading his musk Hobbit:  No fucks given whatsoever. He's not doing a bad job, it's just that he's clearly not taking this seriously. Thandi: No, he has exactly the right tone for what that movie is. I would say that As [00:03:00] an understated for him character, it's Nick Cage that could bring it up a notch and he's still perfect. The movie for what it is, for the time in which it came out and what it does in cinema, is pretty much perfect. But yeah, the Nick Cage we know is really understated in the rock. Hobbit: Definitely and that is the movie. About this week, the Rock, the Michael Bay, 1996, I wanna say film who by the way, pitch smacked on Twitter and Facebook. If you want to interact with us on the social medias tell us what we're doing wrong or how you like the new format or what we're doing right. I would like that as well. Thandi: Or not you like the silky sound of our voices. Hobbit: Dulcet tones, Thandi: Our dulcet tones sweet caramel Hobbit: Oozing all over Nicholas Cage. Usually the rock. It is a pure example of what Michael Bay is good at, which is just making really dumb, [00:04:00] really straightforward, blow 'em up action adventure movies. Thandi: Ridiculous nonsense, spectacle. You know, the, the Rock is even though it's an early Michael Bay movie, it's super indicative of his style, which is like quick cuts and like no sense of spatial geography, shit's all over the place. It could be taking place on the ceiling or like, I don't know, in Hong Kong and then California and then New York. It could be anywhere, but you don't care because it's about the energy of the scene. Hobbit: and there's plenty of energy in this while since I've seen The Rock. It surprised me how many very well known actors have like very brief roles in this You've got the Candy Mane himself, Tony Todd that's in like two scenes, Thandi: Yeah. He is one of the, the Marine guys, one of the military. Hobbit: and he is got just one real scene that he has where he is like talking about how we're not, this isn't a threat. We will do this. We will blow up a bunch of people, and that's his main moment in the. Fucking [00:05:00] Candyman gets maybe 45 seconds of screen time in this movie. Thandi: Yep. At random Bokeem Woodbine  Hobbit: right. I didn't even realize he was in this movie until about three quarters of the way through watching it, and then he just pops up randomly.  You've got, of course, there's Michael Bean dying almost immediately as, as he's wants to Thandi: Yeah. As soon as they do the incursion, boom, gone David Morse, who I actually knew David Morse from St. Elsewhere, cuz that's how old I am. David Morse is just, yeah, just in that piece. Hobbit: And he has a little bit more time on screen, but not still, not much. I mean, he's not doing a ton. John Spencer as a director of Womack. Is a relatively well-known actor as well and he may have been in there for a day because most of his role was just looking at a screen and going, no Thandi: Yeah. William Forsyth. Hobbit: William Forsyth. Yeah. Yeah. Thandi: Yeah. There, there's a lot of big names, but like for the John c McGinley. Hobbit: that's, he was in like two seconds of it as like the [00:06:00] weird gadget guy, which becomes a trope in a lot of other Michael Bay movies is the guy that makes. Contraptions and shit, but he does one and it doesn't even really pay off Thandi: Yeah. Hobbit: He like Thandi: But he's in there, Hobbit: yeah. Thandi: just, just nineties guys. It's, it's these actors that we're all like, oh, I, I know this guy so well. It's because it's 30 years later and yeah. They've had long and storied careers at this point. Hobbit: As much as this is pretty straight ahead, there's no. Surprises really in this movie, it's still an enjoyable ride. You've got the cheesy one-liners throughout you've got big blow 'em up action, shoot 'em up sequences. Going through the sewers and stuff of Alcatraz, I didn't realize that Alcatraz was built on a underground mining roller coaster. But I didn't like I'll  Thandi: fun nineties movie without a fun underground nineties  Hobbit: rollercoaster Okay, well this could be mashed up with Temple of Doom if tracks were long enough. You know, what the [00:07:00] fuck? I forgot about that completely. And then that started happening. What were they making the prisoners do on Alcatraz? There's caverns, there's Thandi: why are there random spinning blades of doom? Because there are, Hobbit: I can just imagine Alcatraz when it was working that there's people in the mines of Alcatraz. Thandi: see, I think maybe it was just an amusement park. That's how they were paying for the prison. They had an amusement park that went underneath the prison. Hobbit: The most terrifying amusement park you can think of. Come on, get on the ride. Little kid Thandi: You took a wrong turn to coaster and now you're getting molested. Hobbit: This ride's called the Birdman of Alcatraz, where we just launch you via slingshot into the ocean. Yeah. There, there's so much nonsense. But the thing is like, you're not supposed to care. Like you, you're, Thandi: No you're not. Not for Eddie. Michael Bay Hobbit: No, you cannot examine a Michael Bay movie with any level of seriousness because it'll just completely fall apart if you do. Physics don't really matter. Yeah, like you said, directions don't matter. You, you would not be able [00:08:00] to map out Alcatraz by this movie by any Thandi: Yeah, because Michael Bay is selling a feeling. He's not selling a narrative. He's selling a feeling. He wants you to feel the energy of the scenes that he's strung together, seemingly haphazardly, and he's successful at that. Hobbit: The one thing that is different in this movie Ver versus a lot of his other films, is there's like this low, sometimes not so low key like hyper nationalism that really peppers in through a lot of his films. And in this film, it's highly critical of the American government. Thandi: how they've abandoned their soldiers. Hobbit: Yeah, and it's on all ends. You've got the I imprisoned without a trial. British spy. You've got the soldiers that are fighting for, you know, for basically benefits for the fallen soldiers. Nobody thinks the government's doing a good job. And then you've got, you know, the, the director Womack, that is a piece of shit, clearly and everybody knows he is a piece of shit like. Nicholas Cage, who is a straight laced by the rule book guy, by the end of it is just [00:09:00] like, I don't know, like fuck this guy. He was vaporized just totally down to lie to the government by the end of it. Thandi: y you know, Nick or Michael Bay's real thing is just he, he is, his main interest is the guys who do the work. So generally just it's, it's not the guys in the chair, it's the guys who do the work. And that's his love of soldiers too. Those are the guys out in the field who do the work. So he feels that they deserve the respect. And that's, that's true through all his movies. It's the guys who actually are out in the field getting their hands dirty. That's who Michael Bay celebrates. Hobbit: And that's definitely the case in this movie. I guess we're about ready to like dive in. I drew the straw of the real take for this version of the Rock. So I'm Thandi: Real take. Hobbit: the real take real take being what we think might actually work. For a remake or reimagining of the rock. And for this, because it's so straight ahead, there's a lot of d different directions you can take this, [00:10:00] but I thought it being a fun action movie. I wanted to kind of continue in that spirit, but maybe add a little bit more social commentary or subtext underneath that classic action like vibe. Is this conversation about the government and how people react to a crooked government.  There are people that fight it like straight up 60 style or, you know, being held without parole and like, you know, trying to fight the system by exposing their secrets kind of thing, which is Sean Connery's character. Then you've got the hyper militarized you know, mercenaries that take over Alcatraz that are gonna do it by any means necessary. But then you see the infighting on what level they're willing to take it within those mercenaries. You've got Nicholas Cage who ends up being kind of like the soldier that turns to help the common man by the end of it. There's, there's a lot of different ways people deal with the, the crookedness of the government in this, in this film. And I thought putting a modern lens on it by having those soldiers come [00:11:00] imitating what we've seen in real life with the right wingers that took over the. Was it Yellowstone Park or what was the park system that they took over back Oh, the the cattle The cattle guys having a little bit of that as the aspect, so it's not just about soldiers. I think focusing on like va something that a lot of people have more experience with that the veterans affairs in this country are miserable. The soldiers that have have not lost their life, lost limb, or their health, their, their mental. That aren't getting the support that they need. So having maybe a collection of soldiers that are retired that are dealing with VA stuff and being like, this is, this isn't, you know, cool. And following that same kind of path that Ed Harris's character did Francis Hummel in the, in the original, but it being more about taking care of the soldiers that are still around, you know, it's be, it's them and their friends that are, you know, missing limbs and then you can have. A little bit more [00:12:00] empathy for these soldiers. As you see, they're all old guys that some of them might have a prosthetic leg or, you know, that these, these are like former soldiers that have been beaten and hurt that are just trying to get what they're due. And so there's. They're the bad guy, quote unquote, but not really, you know? And I really wanted to embolden that in the story a little bit more. It wasn't really pushed on too much. Ed Harris ended up being the only good soldier guy at the end because he wasn't willing to kill 70,000 people. , like that was his line. I thought it'd be a, I think a more complicated win in this movie if this soldiers like you, kind of were rooting for them. They're going about things the wrong way for sure. In this case, it's not gonna be like a rocket full of vaporized, you know aerosol. Thandi: kill gas or. Hobbit: yeah, I think something more simple of just like having an arsenal within range of a major city is enough. You don't have to make it [00:13:00] super sci-fi fancy stuff. Just, Thandi: But nineties Hobbit: the nineties, right? Alcatraz. It's called the Rock. You have to have it take place on Alcatraz. That's. But I did want to have that conversation about, you know, when crooked people earlier in charge, they even the most righteous of people, end up be at odds with each other instead of the real enemy because you know of who's calling the shots. And that being the tragic underpinning of this story is that everybody's trying to do the right thing, and because they're trying to do the right thing, they end up fighting against each other instead of the person that's really pulling strings. So then the conclusion of getting the microfilm the micro fiche and that being leaked to the press at the end, you know, that's one thing that they didn't want Mason or Connery's character out for.  They didn't want him out because they didn't want these secrets. Stanley Nicholas Cage's character helps get that information out. You know, it ends up like at the [00:14:00] same, at the end of the first Black Panther where it's not the version that kil monger wanted of domination. But there is, now Wakanda is now part of the world. There is some truth to what, the bad guy was fighting for veteran affairs gets some of its money. You know, the, the, like, some of it goes through. and and Thandi: then everybody gets to know who actually killed J.F.K. Hobbit: The bad guys kind of win, but not really, you know, it, it's a, it's just a bittersweet conversation about figuring out that sometimes the enemy isn't your enemy. I, I would love that to be kinda the undertone, but that not being, I mean, it, it's still at the end of the day, a fucking action movie. And and you want big blow ups and you want, you know, everybody knows kung Fu. And everybody shoots guns really good. And I think for this, I really needed to get David Leach in there for it.  It seemed like a no-brainer brainer. He was one of the directors of the first John Wick. He went on to do Atomic Blonde, Deadpool [00:15:00] two, Hobbs and Shaw and Bullet Train most recently. He has that right balance of being able to do great action sequences, but also having time for the characters. Do some yuck yucks in between and have character development and dialogue. So I thought that that was a really good fit for a remake of The Rock was to  Thandi: I, I think that would work very well actually. Having seen bullet train recently, I think that's a that's a fun tone to play with in the modern time in general. Hobbit: absolutely. And when Bullet Train very much feels like almost a sendup of nineties action to a degree, it has that like silly. Action kind of vibe to it. So if, if that was applied to a remake of the Rock, I think in a modern take, I think it would fit really, really well. And then you get to play with all the people that David Leach has played with in the past that reappear and du cameos and stuff. So we've got like General Francis Hummel Ed Harris' character. I thought Idris Elba would be [00:16:00] incredible in that role. He was, he was. Thandi: we're canceling the  Hobbit: apocalypse. Yes, the black Superman of Hobbs and Shaw coming out and being just like a, a wounded warrior, a a hardened soldier that wants what's due to him and his brothers just makes I wanna see that. I think that would be, and he would probably play it completely straight, like no winks of the camera, overdoing it, which would make all the zaniness around him that much more fun. He is the moral of the story character, you know, so, so him playing it straight, that gives that underpinning some weight while still everybody else is able to yak. Can he smack do around him? Thandi: Oh, definitely. And most importantly, as Hummel, he has gravity. Hobbit: Yeah,  Thandi: So if you're doing a serious Hummel, Idris Elba has gravity, Hobbit: and I think, yeah, if we can get him to say, cancel the apocalypse at some point like that, that would be gr I'd be super down for that. I'm wondering how often that gets asked on set of something and it was like, you know, we are not for filming, but just for us, can you just say canceling the [00:17:00] apocalypse? He was Thandi: your pocalypse, Hobbit: like, okay, cool. For wire season three, you know, what's, what's happening 20 years later, let's cancel the apocalypse. Thandi: but, but can you do it in like your British accent? Not the wire accent, but like your British one. Just break into it. Hobbit: Yeah. The joys of fame is that everybody has that one line that people want them to say. So yeah, we've got Edris Alba as Francis hum. The FBI director Womack. I thought it would be fun. She is in Hobbs and Shaw, but is also she has that she could play like hard line in power person. Really. Well get Helen Miron to come in and play, play Womack. I mean, I don't feel like I even need to explain that she, I mean I had to actually double check and make sure she did a proper American accent before, cuz I Thandi: does she? Has she done a proper American accent in something? Hobbit: actually in the, the Yellowstone series or the, the prequel series that they have out with like a, a like old, like Dutch, Midwestern kind of accent.  But [00:18:00] she's also been in a couple other roles within American accent and Sounds American. Sounds fine. So I just, I, I couldn't see the FBI director having a British accent. I felt like that was maybe a bridge too far.  Thandi: Well, they're actors. They're, they're prof, they're professional actors. British actors are trained to take on those voices so they can really do just about anything. Hobbit: and British actors classically are pretty good at doing the American accent, so I wasn't that worried, but I just, I couldn't remember her having to do an American accent before, so I just had to check. But yeah, no, she's, she's fine. She's good with that. Then we've got Stanley good speed. I went through a couple. Choices for this one because it's Nicholas fucking cage. Like there is no way they can do Nicholas Cage. So didn't want somebody to do a version of him, but I wanted to do proper justice to the character who, he's a lab geek that gets put out in the world to like, on, on, to deal with this situation. So he is awkward. He doesn't come off as a badass at all. He's kind of [00:19:00] gawky. But I also needed an actor that would be able to do some of the action sequence stuff while still seeming gawky. And I thought that Andrew Garfield would be really fun in that role as the really nerdy lab guy that really likes toxins and stuff and, Thandi: You know, he works really well. Like when, when I originally, cuz behind the scenes, we actually planned the show a while ago. It didn't come together and now it's coming together again. So when I planned my series pitch, I had Nicholas Holt as an idea Hobbit: I thought about him as well. Yeah, Thandi: and LA Keith Stanfield, which we use all the Hobbit: all the, well, cuz he's so good. Thandi: Yeah. But yeah, Andrew Garfield is a great choice. And it, and it, I just, it never came to me that, that would. , but yeah, that's a great choice. Hobbit: And what's funny is I'm now seeing like the, the trajectory between like Nicholas Holt, LA Keith Stanfield and Andrew Garfield as like a certain type of archetype character. You know, like you, you'd just taking it out of the Hot Wheels play set and putting , putting [00:20:00] it in. But yeah, Andrew Garfield, I think he would have a lot of fun in that role. He'd be able to ad lib a little bit put. Charm, like goofy charm to the character that I think would play off of our mason character. John, John Patrick Mason. Played by Sean Connery relatively well. I wanna see this buddy team up. Is you get and I checked ages and this actor is only like five or six years younger than Sean Connery was when he played this role in the rock.  Get Keanu Reeves to be John Patrick Mason. You just let him get a little bit more grizzled, you know, let that pepper and that beard really kind of shine a little bit more. And then you've got Andrew Garfield and Keanu Reeves, like kicking ass on Alcatraz. Thandi: does this version of Mason rub his balls on everything? Because that's not usually Keanu's Mo is, is he a, like a, a different kind of Mason? Hobbit: Yeah. He's not gonna be quite as like, fuck this, fuck that kinda attitude so much as more a little more stoic with his, but as. [00:21:00] Time goes on. He has almost like a maybe older brother kind of energy that he starts developing for Andrew Garfield, where like, he, he realizes that Andrew Garfield isn't the enemy. You know, he may work for the government, but he's just a lab geek that that was where he had to go for his lab geekery. You know, he's, he's not, he's not the guy that's, you know, greedy and trying to take over the world kind of energy. He's just a genuinely good. So he becomes protective of him and kind of lets down his, his emotional guard a little bit more around Andrew Garfield specifically. So you have this like, balance of them having private moments where they share stuff about their lives and about like, can or about Mason's, you know, daughter that he wants to spend more time with. And then he goes out and just breaks fucking bad, super hard as only Kiana Reeves can. And I wanna see that, that shift in energy I think would be really. Then we've got, I, I only did five castings, cuz you've got like the, you've got the daughter, but she's in [00:22:00] one scene. It doesn't really matter. You've got a couple of the other soldiers that I could have cast. But, but I just figured stick to the main main ones. Carla Pelosi Stanley's, I guess fiance at this point is played additionally by Vanessa Marce. I wanted somebody that was like traditionally stunning, but had a little bit of that, alt hotness to her as well for, Thandi: she from? Hobbit: oh, Vanessa Marci, the original actress that played, played the role. She was in the original of The Rock. Yeah Carla Pelosi is the character I wanted for somebody to, to pair with Andrew Garfield. I wanted to have kind of like somebody with kind of like an alternative edge to. , but still a classically just a, a beautiful, you know, woman. So one of my probably top five crushes zzz, he beats in there. I think would be really fun. It's just like the take no shit fiance. No, I'm coming to San Francisco anyway. Fuck you like kind [00:23:00] of energy Thandi: Yeah, she's great. And you're right, she is she's a beautiful woman, but she does have kind of an alt energy. Yeah, that works. Hobbit: So, yeah, and I think I, for some reason, I could see her kind of being into the, like lanky, gawky, Andrew Garfield type, you know, person like Andrew Garfield's, not a bad looking dude, but he does have the like classic big Adams, apple, long limb kind of thing going for him. So, Thandi: the, the, the body that Mace girls say, ah, I bet he's got a big dick Hobbit: So that's my casting. I think. Yeah, David Leach would have a ball doing a version of the Rock. Where, the government ends up being the loser at the end of the day, but only kind of, they're still in charge. This isn't one of those movies I feel like is beholden, like everybody loves it, but it's not untouchable. Thandi: So I think for what the Rock is and if you love The Rock, so I don't have any Michael Bay movies that I hold as sacred, but I think that The Rock is a really solid, almost perfect example of a [00:24:00] nineties movie. So there are people, I can understand why there are people that are like, the rock is untouchable, cuz there are people out there that are like, yeah, the Rock is untouchable Hobbit: I don't know. I feel that if you're looking at Michael Bay movies, that would be untouchable. First you'd have to go with ones that you know are original concepts. So a very small number of movies there. I'd say Bad Boys before the Rock. Thandi: really. Hobbit: Yeah. I mean, I feel like there's probably more people that are like beholden to bad boys. You can't do a bad boys with anybody, but Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, there would be a lot more pushback for I think bad boys than there would be for the Rock. Thandi: Yeah. Yeah, I guess I don't like the trajectory of the bad boys films. I don't like what that feel like. They did Martin Lawrence dirty over the course of time, kind of don't like the bad boys  Hobbit: I loved the first one. Second one was so, so, although I hear a lot of people say they like the second one better, but I never bothered with bad boys for life. It looked like garbage from the trailer. I didn't want to Sully.  Thandi: It was the last one I saw in the air of Covid, [00:25:00] so it was the last time I went to the movies for like a year and a half or something. Oh no. Yeah. ending strong. Yeah. Yeah, it sucked. People love that movie. People really enjoy that movie, but it sucked. Oh yeah, no, I didn't have any interest, but luckily Michael Bay does not have his hands all over this next version of the Rock that we are gonna be delivering to us. Unless he did, unless you want to give him another shot. But I'm intrigued. This can go so many ways, so I'm, I'm intrigued to see where he went with this. So my swing for the fences take is something that I actually, I had mentioned before, which is the rock. Starring The Rock Hobbit: Yeah. Yep. Has to. Thandi: And what I'm going for with this take is a it's also a dark action comedy cuz that's kind of what's popular, but also it, it, you know, it's entertaining. It's like generally entertaining in the [00:26:00] modern time. People like action, but they're a little bit depressed, so they're a little bit yeah, they, they, they just like that take on things, not so straightforward, dark action comedy. And I'm going for something indicative of J C V D. I don't know if you remember that movie Hobbit: I loved that movie. Thandi: or like, it's a deconstruction of John Claude Van Damme. It's not a comedy at all. It's very serious cuz and this character's depressed through the whole thing. But yeah, it's, it's a, it's kind of a deconstruction of the rock starring the. Hobbit: I remember J C V D, it was a great movie. Very much enjoyed it. And then there's this moment. That is unnecessarily artistic in a, in a good way when he floats up to the ceiling and then back down, he's talking about how the trajectory of his career got sullied with women and drugs and it's being pretty clearly serious about Jean Claude Van Dam in that moment. And I was just not ready for that. I was just a fun kind of play on his life and then all of a sudden there's this [00:27:00] really real moment in it that just took me off guard. It was great. I, I. Thandi: And the idea of he is not so self serious that he can actually do a movie like this. You'd never see Steven Sagal doing anything like that. Hobbit: No. . No. Never, never. Thandi: in a million years. But the Rock starring the rock takes place on a movie set, which happens to be Alcatraz. They are filming Stanley. Good speed. Stanley the Rock. Good speed. Cuz that's the, the actor that is, that the Rock is playing as himself. Being himself is filming actually a historical movie on Alcatraz Island that is about the Native American occupation of the 1960. Where people just took over the island for 19 months and said, this is our homeland, or whatever, and it went really badly. But that's what the movie's about. And he's filming this movie with his opposite in the movie is Jared Leto. is ? Who's playing [00:28:00] actor? Frank Hummel, actor Frank Hummel is also a cult leader actor. Frank Hummel's cult has decided to take over the island. It was all planned from the beginning before they start filming the movie Hobbit: Oh my God. Thandi: Yeah. Nice little touch there. Is that Frank Hummel is in a band called where did I put that? Oh mercurial Skid is the name of the band he leads. You get, you can see a little retrospective of his, of their careers before the the movie starts. And so he takes over the island. There are families on the island because not normally, but today some of the cast and crew are able to bring their families to the filming. So it becomes a dangerous situation. What happens is that there are arms on the island because they are doing a dramatic recreation of that occupation. So they're using these guns, but there were not supposed to be any live round. What Jared Leto's character did was have his people bring in live rounds [00:29:00] so they could use those guns to take over the island. And so now there's a dangerous situation and they're playing basically mouse maze through the Alcatraz prison itself as they try to both Dodge Leto and catch up to Leto and the, Hobbit: This is already a better, this is already a better movie than the Rock, like this is already, I've already sold at this point. This is fantastic. Thandi: So the Sean Connery character is actually one of the consultants that's working the movie. He used to be an SAS guy, and he's, he's gruff and he's kind of Like, I wanna call him evil. He's not evil, but he's got like a sadistic kind of sensibility where he's having fun during this thing cuz he is ready to fuck some people up. And basically he's paired up with the rock in this situation and the movie's about the rock, trying to maintain his image through this entire situation and not going like full the [00:30:00] movie rock in real life. He's, he doesn't wanna hurt. Not because he doesn't wanna hurt anybody. He doesn't want to damage his brand by hurting people. And so throughout the movie, Daniel Craig becomes the devil on the rock shoulder trying to like coax him more and more and to get in his hands dirty. And so you've got the rock kind of fucking up people like more and more throughout the movie. And Daniel Craig is actually shooting people, but he's trying to get the rock to his level basically, as the movie moves on. There are actors who are playing, the actors that are in the movie, who are part of JaredLeto's cult who represent like the Marines in the original movie. So we have miles Teller as the David Morse character Tom Baxter. And then for the other followers that are in this movie, we have John Boyega and Zach Efron.  Bokeem Woodbine. Cuz I always like to bring somebody. Hobbit: Yeah. Yeah. Absolut. Thandi: Anthony Ramos who people might know from [00:31:00] what's the the president the guy who rap sings Hamilton. Hobbit: Lin Manuel Miranda, like, Thandi: So Anthony Ramos was in Hamilton Hobbit: Okay. Thandi: and he was also in the other musical from last year Dancing musical about the neighborhood Hobbit: Oh in the  Thandi: Heights Something Heights. In The Heights. Hobbit: Yes. Thandi: That's Anthony Hobbit: Oh, Anthony, I know exactly who you're talking about now. Yeah, absolutely. Thandi: I first encountered him in and she's Gotta Have It, which was a remake of Spike Lee's movie as a TV show on like Netflix And then I wanted to add, since this is not actually a prison and it's a movie, I wanted to add a female follower, so Leslie Jones, Hobbit: Oh. Thandi: but as it's a violent action comedy, this Leslie Jones is not just doing her Leslie Jones thing. She's actually mean. She's actually fucking up people. Hobbit: was about to say, you have to have her being one of the most violent, like most aggressive. Thandi: Yeah. She's a monster. And then I wanted a kid [00:32:00] in danger. And I could not find a kid actor who was born before or after like 2011. So I settled on Cade Woodward, who was the kid who died in a quiet place, but the kid's like 15 years old or something. It's, it's so hard, like, it's so hard unless you watch a lot of TV to identify actual child actors. Hobbit: tell you the little bit of the inside baseball of this show is there's some movies that we have not done because there's too many kids in it. Like finding kid actors that are  identifiable where it's actually fun to talk about is really hard. Thandi: Because that's not where the Zeit guy stands for movies now. It has been in the past, but it's not there right now. Hobbit: And also us as men in our forties probably shouldn't have a Rolodex of information about young children, actors. It's not, not really our it's not our specialty that, that it's not our career path. So we should probably Thandi: Yeah, and I don't, I don't think that like Teen Disney and [00:33:00] Nickelodeon are doing like tween sitcoms anymore either. I don't think that's like a, a farming ground for that kind of stuff anymore. So it's just hard to know these people. Hobbit: So now Thandi: yeah, there's a little kid in there. Hobbit: things are all the stranger things, kids are all in their Thandi: They're all like 20 Hobbit: So, Thandi: But yeah, there's a little kid in there who the rock meets early in the movie, Hey, you're here with your parents. Hi. It's great. I wanna be just like you, Stanley, the rock could speed or whatever. And then that kid is in danger at the end of the movie, which is the apotheosis. Where we have at, this is ridiculous on the face of it, but basically we established early on that Jared Leto's character is a martial arts master, as like an ultimate badass. He's like kicking people's ass throughout the movie or whatever. But by the end of the movie, the apotheosis is basically the rock's. Like, all right, I gotta save this kid. Fuck it. And there's no big fight. It's the Rock decides that he's going to save this kid. And he kills Jared Leno. [00:34:00] He breaks him like Bain immediately. Hobbit: like right off. Thandi: Yeah, he just immediately breaks him. Daniel Craig, his character actually takes the rap for it cuz he is just happy that he got the Rock to do this crazy thing. Hobbit: Sure. Thandi: And  Hobbit: I can see this too, of there being some long diatribe that Jared Leno's doing is he pulling his white robe off and exposing like 18 abs. Thandi: his his his skinny guy muscles, Hobbit: And he's, walking, like looking away from the rock as he is delivering like all this, you know, the power that I have from within and all this shit. And he turned around and then just screams that like high pitched girl scream as he just gets ripped in half. Thandi: and half. That's what I want to see. Hobbit: Yes please. You know how cathartic that's gonna be for some people to just see Jared Leto ripped in half. Thandi: Oh, so many people would Hobbit: so many people would go to the movie just for that. I think. Thandi: because at this point, the the, the zeitgeist is such that regular people just don't like Jared Leto. They don't know why. They just know that people don't like Jared Leto and they don't like him either. But I have a few more actors. Hobbit: Okay. Thandi: David Harbor is [00:35:00] the FBI Director Hobbit: Nice. Okay. Thandi: Sophia Vigara is Carla. Hobbit: Nice. Thandi: And John Cho is the FBI special agent in charge. We do get a cameo from the president. It's not a big enough situation that it needs to like cut back to the president over and over again or whatever, but Sam Jackson is the president. Hobbit: Nice. Hell yeah. I was thinking Thandi: love Sam Jackson Hobbit: I was thinking about cameos and I just didn't know where to play with some, but clearly with David Leach there'd be a Ryan Reynolds appearance somewhere, some just minor role maybe Bokeem Woodbine's character who's in it for like four seconds with the entire. Thandi: then done, Hobbit: just done. Yeah. Or Brad Pitt like he did in a Deadpool yes, absolutely. That'd be incredible. Yeah. I am so sad. This is in a real movie. That sounds incredible. I would, I would go to the theater in a heartbeat to watch that version. Thandi: Yeah, just a good time. Hobbit: yeah, that sounds so big, dumb, fun, self-aware kind of. Thandi: the, and the rock. Like, you know, the rock is a good natured guy and his presence [00:36:00] as far as his brand is, is really good. But like that self-awareness that yeah, you just come off like your promotion machine at this point, dude, Hobbit: Yeah. Thandi: we all like you, but you, you like, you're like, you're always on selling something or whatever. Dude, it's it's a lot. Hobbit: And I would love to see this hesitance where, yeah, he is a beast. He probably could mutilate you. Like, no, I don't actually hurt people. That's not in my character. I'm Thandi: I sell tequila. What do you want from Hobbit: Right. . Look dude, I got a kid. I don't wanna go to jail. I'm into it. That's fucking fantastic.  I, this, these are these moments on smack my pitch up that are painful when it's something that won't happen. You know, we come, it's a really good concept and it's just, it, it's like, great. Now this is a thing that I never get to have. So so thank  Thandi: you. know, can, can you hold a rainbow in your hand? Hobbit: And a rainbow is the rock ripping Jared Leto in a half? Yeah. Yeah. I think that might be The name of this episode is ripping Jared Leto in a half. Alright, we are at the [00:37:00] tail end of this episode of Smack. My pitch up. One mashup that I thought would be kind of fun is that you just replaced the giant. Coup on Alcatraz with fight Club with just like the Project Mayhem dudes. Just trying to, so the Seeds of Chaos would be kind of fun. Thandi: Oh, that'd be big fun. I, I could see that. The longest yard. The rock with the longest yard, they're playing the football game and then like military incursion breaks out. Hobbit: Oh, Jesus Thandi: Adam Sandler. Save us all Hobbit: Oh, God. Doomed. Doomed. All right, we got one last little bit of stuff to do here. We're talking about our trailers, so I'm gonna do my David Leach action project, and then if you wanna follow up with your version here Here we go. From the director that brought you John Wick, atomic [00:38:00] Blonde, and Hobbes and Shaw gives you a new vision of action Insanity. Alcatraz Island off the San Francisco Bay. A place for prisoners or a place for terror this summer. Stanley, good speed. Regular lab schmo teams up with John Patrick, Patrick Mason, an escape artist to save the world from the deranged intent of General Francis Hummel. Join Iris Elba, Helen Mirren. Andrew Garfield, Keanu Reeves, and featuring Zazie Beetz who's the winner? Who's the loser? Who's the enemy? The rock. Thandi: The rock is all the [00:39:00] things. Hobbit: The rock is different to every person. Okay? It's not one thing to one person. My Lord and Savior. And he just may be a comfort to you Yeah. Some people I think, do look at the Rock as their Lord and Savior, honestly, so you're not too far off. Thandi: Hm. Hobbit: All right, so we've got your your, I think, perfect film that we've got next, moving forward. Thandi: too kind Hobbit: And did, who's directing this? Your, your version, Thandi: Oh, oh yeah. You know what? That is funny. John Chu, John m Chu who directed step Up to GI Joe Retaliation Jim and the Holograms. Actually, yeah crazy Rich Asians in The Heights, which I can't believe I couldn't come up with that movie cuz he directed in the Heights. I was going for somebody who does like, pretty shots and bright colors like, like the children of Michael Bay, but not one of the children of Michael Bay as far as the directorial style. Hobbit: Okay. Cool. Cool, cool. All right, so we, we are John [00:40:00] Shu. Definitely re-imagining of the rock. So here we go. Thandi: What's harder than The Rock? The Rock. Stanley. The rock. Good. Speed. In another movie this time on the island of Alcatraz. But what happens when things get out of crazy ass Jared Leto takes over the island with his cult? Yes. In this version of the Rock, we have Jared Leto as Frank Hummel, we have Daniel Craig, as John Patrick Mason, a shady guy with an SAS Pass that Special forces from Great Britain. Who's on the rock shoulder saying, do it. Do it. Yeah. The rock's gonna go hard if he can get past his brand identity, come on and let's see how hard it gets on the rock.[00:41:00]  Hobbit: I'm fucking here for it. That is incredible. Yes. All right. So thank you so much to my co-host Andy, for bringing, bringing it hard on this long overdue episode of Smack My Pitch Up. Thandi: We're back, baby Hobbit: and we'll hopefully be releasing. The plan is to be releasing weekly from here on out. So please tell us what you wanna hear.  Take a look at what we haven't covered, some of your favorite TV shows or movies or what have you. Throw it at us and we just might do it on an episode. You can hit us Thandi: some input from Hobbit: 100%, especially with the new format. Let us know how you. We are available through email at geeks under the influence gmail.com. Just put smack my pitch up in the subject line you can is up on pitch smacked both on Facebook and Twitter or hit up the GUI hotline at 8 0 4 5 0 5 4 4 8 4. Let us know what you think. Take voicemails and texts on that number. So It hit up our new account on key. Yeah, you are begging for us to have a [00:42:00] key party account.  That's for, that's pre our first live event. We'll get a key party account going. yay, . All right. Until next time. I'm Mike the Hobbit Thandi: and I'm Thandi Hobbit: and you just got pitch smacked Thandi: in the face. Hobbit: the face in the rock, in the rocks. Thandi: Oh my stones.

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 92 - Beverly Hills Cop: Fatal Instinct Hobbit and Thandi head to Beverly Hills to stick bananas in tailpipes and solve some crimes! Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" "Opus One" and "Assassins" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 91 - Condorman Fringe (Mash-Ups) Thandi and Hobbit put on matching outfits, and try to start a gang of street tuffs. Subscribe: bit.ly/SMPUpod A new mini-sode format on "off" weeks on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and Thandi pitch a mash-up story with the previous episode's film/show Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries Transcript (Auto-generated): 0:07 the views and opinions expressed on smack my pitch up are those of the panelists and not that of the gui media 0:12 network or associated brands and sponsors listener discretion is advised 0:18 this podcast is rated r for violence language and nudity because clothing is 0:24 a prison and society will not cage me 0:35 in a world with too many reboots and remakes two men will stop at nothing to 0:40 make it even worse this is smack my picture 0:48 [Music] 1:01 hello geeks and welcome to another little mini episode of smack my pitch up mashups and uh here with me as always is 1:08 tandy i'm the butter for the potatoes because they're mash-ups 1:13 wow i'll be upset if i wasn't more jealous than upset about the fact that you came 1:18 up with that joke before i did so i'm here to make the people happy and 1:24 food makes us all happy and if you are listening and have listened before then you are partial to dad jokes because no 1:30 one's going to hate dad jokes and listen to this this show more than once uh let's be fair here 1:36 but for those i'm familiar with to be fair we'll never tell you how old we actually are so uh yeah yeah just it's 1:42 okay just rest assured it's okay it is fine we are of the age bracket that this is acceptable 1:48 and uh for those unfamiliar with this version of the short episodes of smackdown pitch up it is a 1:54 relatively new experiment we're doing is taking the match up from the main episode and giving it time to really 2:00 breathe a little bit more so we're going to be mashing up uh the latest episode 2:05 with uh other properties to see what might stick what doesn't and last 2:10 episode we talked about the warriors the uh we are the warriors yeah it is a 2:18 uh i guess the grittier not really american cousin to a 2:25 clockwork orange is a little bit uh the 70s or west side story sure yeah 2:33 yeah i'm just picturing and that's the first matchup that i thought of with this is that there's this alternate world like everything's everything's 2:40 multiverse right now in in pop culture so there's a multiverse where it's the 2:46 clockwork orange world and the warriors world and they're part of the same world it's just 2:52 different cultures uh version of the yeah well you know a world ruled by 2:58 gangs you could actually do that because both of them are not quite right like the gangs seem to be way more powerful 3:05 entities than they actually should be so yeah that that does kind of work i'm like significantly and i'm used to this 3:12 in action movies i really am like the number of fast and furious movies where i'm like this is a whole city and you have like three cops is kind of 3:19 ridiculous um or all the cops show up together at the same time there isn't 3:24 there's one or the other you have like maybe no cops or one cop or 300 cop cars there's no in between 3:32 yeah but yeah with the warriors the situations where you get the 300 cop cars of the movies where the cops are 3:37 intentionally like uh they're not good at being cops so you just just strengthen numbers just 3:44 the the blues brothers all incompetent yeah just all the cops following the car like did 3:50 none of the cops think to like maybe drive ahead like stop them 3:55 ahead of time no okay cool they're all in like the the the banana in your tailpipe squad they're just 4:01 they're all just like eddie axel foley's foiled all of them at the same time 4:08 well i did like in clockwork orange where there's the moment where his former droogs are now police officers 4:13 and they're like yeah it's basically the same thing and uh there's a nice little jab at authority but it's also kind of true in 4:20 in the circumstances of that film and well life but there wasn't that same conversation happening in the warriors 4:26 but you could see that i would love to have a moment where like alec and his and his droogies go on vacation to like 4:34 rockaway beach or something and they end up running into the warriors or all the baseball furies or 4:39 all the different warrior gangs uh would be pretty asking 4:44 immediately what neighborhood they're from because they're wearing their drew costumes exactly and their cod piece in pajamas 4:50 or whatever they start talking in that like fantasy cockney or whatever they're doing from uh clockwork orange and the 4:57 other gangs from new york are like what the [ __ ] are you talking about a little early i leaned out then the 5:04 milk bars and the warriors are like i i don't know what 5:09 you're i thought i'd spoke english but our gangs are 60 000 strong and we have 5:15 one gun between us somebody go get the gun somebody get the one get one gun 5:21 [Laughter] uh yeah i want to see that version of west side story and warriors versus 5:27 droogs uh one gun story which actually does i guess technically fit 5:32 in website story no they used a knife what was it a gun i don't remember doesn't matter anyway i think i believe 5:39 that there was so i haven't seen west side story in a long time i didn't see the new one 5:44 but uh when the lead murders that dude that was that a gun or did they have a knife fight 5:51 i think body shots no i think he there was a gun involved but that's not what was used to to shoot them at the uh 5:58 in the warehouse fight scene or whatever i think that was a knife the gun was used later gotcha to shoot 6:05 to shoot dude that yeah the main dude the main you know the maria was like 6:11 i wanna i wanna do this i wanna do this guy yeah you know so i do wanna see west 6:18 side story but only because it's a spielberg film i don't like musicals that much and i just otherwise i have no 6:24 interest in seeing that movie uh i saw it i and i do like musicals not all but yeah i 6:30 do have an appreciation for them uh this movie a west side story didn't really need to be made it's 6:36 beautiful it's a very beautiful movie it's choreographed incredibly well uh the colors are vibrant the 6:42 choreography is incredible looks great um costuming is good singing's fine you 6:48 know like everything's good but there's nothing about it that like needed to be made like the old movie's 6:54 fine you don't it's it's not it's not uh breaking any new ground no it just has a little bit of 7:00 that uh cinematic uh spielberg pixie dust on it um that it's just 7:07 beautifully shot looks great but it's not so much of an improvement it needed to be done 7:13 how's ansel elgort he seemed like a weird choice to me i had no idea that he 7:18 could sing and apparently uh yeah he can he can sing very well he's 7:25 uh he's he did a great job i feel like that's part of your formal acting training um you know not as many 7:31 actors in the modern time have formal acting training but if you get it i feel like you know being able to sing 7:37 uh passively at least is part of it because that happens all the time where you get an actor actress that's in a 7:42 movie where they have a singing part and they've been in film for 20 years and not sung and then suddenly they come out 7:49 and have to sing apart okay cool rosario dawson did that with rent uh russell 7:55 crowe didn't do that also the studio can get anybody a vocal coach true it's like it's like getting it's like getting beef 8:01 nasty for your role you're like uh you're a skinny dude the studio can hire anybody to make you 8:07 you know shredded so they can definitely hire somebody to make you a passable singer so what was 8:13 russell crowe's excuse in les miserables because he was terrible 8:18 in that it was bad his ego told him he didn't need a vocal coach yeah probably he's 8:24 like it'd be more gritty it'd be more gritty if i sounded like this right 8:29 and i think it was ryan reynolds one some likable actor that mentioned 8:34 about getting ripped for a role he's like yeah the trick is be rich like it's not this isn't a 8:40 complicated thing like you have rob mcinney or uh the the dude from it's 8:45 always something oh that's right yeah that's who he said yeah that he said yeah it's not complicated you get a personal trainer that like pushes you 8:52 and you like have no say in the matter and then you'll get ripped yeah yeah and 8:57 there's no pleasure and spend all your time dedicated to the thing yeah yeah and then ta-da yeah it's not complicated 9:05 the rest of us are trying to have like a life and enjoy i don't know food and you know worldly delights 9:11 no because we're all going to die eventually anyway you might as well have fun on the way yeah absolutely i guess 9:18 uh yeah i'm not going to be i guess fun is something actually famous in any way shape or form at any point in my life i 9:23 don't think so i might as well enjoy this cheeseburger you know that's 9:28 yeah well you never know but you know there's no there's no restrictions on being famous you can be famous 9:35 and be in any shape or look like anything so that's not the biggest concern there i'm 9:41 i'm in the uh but uh today's just the uh jack black camp of 9:48 lovable chubby bearded man vibe that's uh that's what i'm going for 9:53 yeah but when you're rich you can get ripped at any time that's true that's true and it'll be that like chris pratt 9:58 moment of like he used to be chubby and now he's not oh my god 10:04 [Laughter] with some people going oh that's that's a horrible betrayal yep can you can you just wear the fat 10:10 thor outfit or i i love yeah there's a little bit of blow back for thor losing weight but to 10:16 the credit of the movie even from the trailer it shows that they are actually showing him working off the weight it's 10:21 not like that magic transformation off-screen thing um so that's that's appreciated the only 10:27 time that i can remember that the showing the working out didn't go over well was in the series battlestar 10:32 galactica uh but that's because the gateway game was like nonsense like it didn't it was 10:38 for no reason it was a very weird choice that they were like about the modern one the modern one yeah 10:44 i don't know if you've seen that or not i haven't seen any of it i know that edward james almost is on it and that is 10:50 all that i have for the modern battle star galactica if if you had about 200 other things to it then you got the 10:57 basic just to the show but yeah no edward james almost is amazing in it he's incredible this doesn't spoil 11:03 anything apollo who's his son uh just gets fat at one point he's like i guess 11:08 i'm gonna get fat and so his character just gets fat and he's wearing a terrible fat suit and then i don't know 11:14 where they were planning on going with it but i guess it just wasn't go selling very well so like the beginning of the next is it like is it part of the 11:20 narrative or just something that you don't like what happens to people kind of but yeah but it's more of like you know that he's 11:27 he's losing focus or whatever i don't know that kind of thing like it's not really necessary at all like they could have 11:34 portrayed that in so many other ways besides a really bad fat suit um but then it just shows him like to get 11:39 married and have kids or something or uh not quite but there was a little family space pilot now 11:46 he was depressed because he wasn't with the one he actually wanted to be with or something and there was no they weren't 11:51 fighting robots at the moment so he's like i don't know what to do with my time i guess i'll eat sandwiches and then he just gained a bunch of 11:56 weight and then the season happens beginning of the next season he it starts with him being like 12:02 somebody handing him a jump rope and be like get your [ __ ] together man he's like okay and then shows him jumping rope and then it's like three months 12:08 later and it's him like without the fat suit on just like putting his jumper like cool after three months of jump 12:13 roping i'm back to my regular yeah regular look of not being fat it 12:18 was a great choice it was great uh great cinema there 12:25 wasn't uh confusing and bewildering at all so so back to the uh the the mashups 12:32 because you're you're the the west side story mashup uh got me thinking about something i 12:37 don't want to lose focus on that sure sure which is um the warriors 12:43 and not too far moved time-wise uh the gang from the community center uh of 12:50 breaking and breaking too so turbo and ozone and the gang yes and so new york has transitioned into 12:57 breakdance fighting and the warriors are trying to transition into this new way of being in new york city trying to find their 13:03 footing but then somebody kills their new leader but not literally they just do like a 13:08 michael jackson spin and like a sick moonwalk and totally destroys leaders 13:14 rep in the community and the lawyers have to train to get good enough at break dancing to win the day 13:21 who trains them turbo and ozone breaking three the warriors that's incredible i 13:27 would watch the [ __ ] out of that and i just want that moment where the warriors are like so good that 13:32 uh the opposing side somebody starts breakdancing up the ceiling as expected 13:39 uh and then one of the warriors like oh yeah and then they start go dancing on the ceiling and it's like oh no moment 13:45 like they have like the magic kung fu moment of like no i've learned the five finger death punch as well moment i 13:52 would love that yeah i i just want to i believe in the beat montage and somehow the warriors are saving the 13:58 community center again i just yeah cool into it but because it's a warriors movie somebody has to get stabbed at 14:04 some point it may be the end or yeah yeah somebody right before they're about to like 14:09 do the robot or something they like open their arm up to do the little swingy thing and they get stabbed in the side 14:15 or somebody puts a knife in their hand when they're doing the like tick-tock clock arm thing and then they 14:20 stab themselves on the side it's perfect i love it 14:26 i believe in the and then you get the audible record scratch on the soundtrack as they stab themselves in the beats 14:32 what else was i thinking there's well one of the other mash-ups that we mentioned i think i think we might have mentioned it on 14:38 the show where you mentioned it in the recording it got cut out but uh batman 66. yes because of the henchmen 14:46 mm-hmm because of the other the gotham style uh henchmen with their 14:51 cute little costumes matching outfits would slot nicely into the the warriors 14:57 genre so the warriors road trip into gotham city i do think that was in the final edit but yeah um 15:03 that yeah the warriors becoming part of the batman universe would be pretty incredible um 15:12 maybe they go to gotham city to like try to like be the hit like mr zazz is looking for new henchmen and the 15:17 warriors are like oh we we could hang with mr zazz i like that yeah and they roll up but they're they might 15:23 be a gang it might be a street tufts but they have like a moral center so they're like not down with victor's ass he does 15:29 some stuff a little too too freaky deaky so if victor's house works how about this mr zazz is is like you know what i 15:36 like the cuttier jib warriors and i can take all of you except for ajax because mr zazz is not down with rapists 15:44 everybody can come ajax i think i'm going to cut you up actually 15:49 and the wrestlers are like fair fair enough fair yeah yeah damn so 15:54 even victor says i was like dude there's a line like you 16:00 you yeah what's the the guardians of yelling things like i might be an [ __ ] but i'm not 100 a dick like this 16:06 victor's ass being like nah man like that's just not cool i'm into that i would love to see the wars as a roving 16:12 gang and like anything where there's like other groups to fight like the avengers uh or no more the defenders 16:20 the defenders let's do oh let's do street level um [ __ ] iron fist and uh daredevil 16:27 and uh power man and uh we've got jessica jones and and 16:33 yeah and punisher rolling in and the warriors are like no that's not fair he brought 16:38 many guns like punisher brought too many guns we have knives i don't that was not part of 16:44 the i had this piece of window pane that broke but when i was looking for a weapon i have a pipe he's got an ak-47 16:51 he's got five of them those are his little guns this is not fair 16:56 is he is that about how about the the warriors the warriors show up in the avengers 17:02 movie but it's their own movie but it's it's on the uh the day that the chitauri 17:07 invaded and it's the warriors trying to deal with the chitauri invasion at coney island 17:12 that i make that a whole movie of just like some locals local street tuffs uh that 17:18 are fighting the chatari on the beach would be our tony island imagine just a sequence where like they end up fighting 17:25 and end up falling into like the the tilt-a-whirl or something and they're just fighting with shitara in the 17:32 world or the the [ __ ] or the background the roller coaster goes by and there's like a warrior and a chitauri on the standing up on the 17:38 coaster like stabbing at each other marvel you need to be listening to this show because 17:43 these are clearly dumb ideas but everyone would go see it everyone would 17:49 go see these terrible ideas the plus is that yes marvel needs more because the world is big enough now that 17:56 they can do more stuff about what happens at the street level like agents of shield had some of that 18:01 as far as like what's happening in the background while this other bigger stuff is going on sure yeah yeah but i think 18:07 that would be a lot of fun like um something that they tried to do with uh was that tv show damage control 18:13 like uh vanessa what because damage control is actually 18:18 marvel what's the the the dc version of that oh they had a tv show yeah it was the dc version of it 18:24 had alan titic and vanessa hudgens in it it wasn't damn yeah maybe that is damage control 18:30 but i thought that was marvel but yeah yeah uh yeah and one of them was bruce wayne's cousin but it was about what happens you know 18:36 in the universe outside of what specifically batman is doing or what specifically superman is doing 18:42 and we get to find out what happens to the warriors while batman and superman are doing their thing up in the sky 18:48 and i i love that i don't think it was called uh powerless was the name of the series um 18:54 yeah i'm looking at it now and uh collateral damage is the name of the company 18:59 oh don't nope that's not same concept though but yeah not collateral damage i'm not 19:04 seeing it anyway but yeah the same concept basically is a it was a gag i think on both accounts uh 19:11 i forget which company did it first but they were basically playing off of each other as this like cleanup crew 19:18 that was responsible for like because it makes sense yeah it does make sense i mean costumed heroes do make a big mess 19:23 especially in the boys universe but that's a different uh different topic 19:29 it's a bloody mess it's it's different than uh the the bricks falling and magically not hitting anybody yeah 19:34 exactly uh with the boys i would love to see just the one panel that the warriors would be in 19:40 as just a gag of the comics where right before their heads are exploding exactly they show up and they're in their 19:46 outfits and they're like yo let's rumble and then they're just missing their heads in the next panel with blood splattering 19:52 everywhere and like a train standing there just like filing his nails or something would be 19:57 a treat really yeah and and that could hold true for almost anybody 20:03 any member of the warriors could just even uh even the uh the the the ocean guy 20:09 could do that to the warriors and that would be even more fun the swimmy magoo yes 20:17 what made the warriors so interesting as a series wasn't the fact that they they uh were good 20:23 at fighting um they they were better than a lot of the gangs they ended up running across but just by happening 20:28 they were better than everybody it was ridiculous those fights i'm like this is like what why why are you guys 20:35 so tough in this situation it doesn't it doesn't make sense for you to be tough in these situations and also why did you 20:42 bring tagger dude with you on this on this mission because he's not helping he's not helping and also why are there 20:49 only nine of you when these other street gangs seem to have an unlimited supply of dudes and 20:55 there's nine of you it's like 20 30 dudes coming after you and you're like yeah we're good we're fine 21:01 we're the we're the warriors we're the warriors we like to come out and play we rumble we were taught by arthur 21:06 fonzarelli the best wish that there was a like the crow moment where where the cure is playing and he's putting on his 21:12 face makeup uh i wish there was that moment for the baseball furies where like before they come out 21:17 and like put on their roller skates and get their baseball bats and like are ready to rumble that it's just them like 21:23 maybe put me in coach playing in the background and as they're like no no instead of uh 21:29 like 90s music their background music is kiss yes they're playing some kiss in the background that's that's perfect yes 21:35 some kiss playing in the background is black diamond is blasting from the uh speakers as dude is just like covering 21:42 his face in white makeup getting ready to be up a badass gang member as you do 21:47 um looking like a baseball mime yeah i would i want that i would love it i 21:52 would love it that would be a a load of fun i'm trying to think about like tv mashups because uh 22:00 as i'm remembering i don't remember too many street gang shows or coalitions of of youths 22:07 uh from tv shows in that manner i'd be interested to see a crossover with boardwalk empire i know that's about 22:14 jersey but uh if they're trying to expand their operations to coney some time traveling the warriors yeah yeah 22:21 the warriors were where uh yeah or maybe just like this is decades later that the like 22:27 the children of whoever you know are now in operation are trying to move into 22:32 kony to get into the carnival game and uh and the warriors don't like their 22:37 turf being stepped on or something would be actually i'm thinking about time 22:43 specific stuff now i'm like all caught up i'm thinking like the warriors versus hunter if you don't remember who hunter 22:49 was hunter was basically made for tv dirty harry so fred dreyer was hunter he's the next 22:54 football player they were like i want a dirty hairy style tv show so they got 23:00 fred dryer to play hunter who is basically dirty harry he carries a big ass gun 23:05 he kills people sometimes as tv cops in the 80s did but uh yeah the warriors versus hunter 23:11 the warriors versus all of the uh the the street vigilantes of the 80s so the warriors versus knight rider 23:18 the warriors versus street hawk which is night ride on a motorcycle the warriors versus blue thunder which is knight 23:23 rider in a helicopter yep and an air wolf knight rider in the helicopter gotta do a team as well then 23:30 a team because that's the team yes a team would be [ __ ] except the warriors call the a a-team in for help 23:36 well that's what the switcheroo is is that they come in and they think that they're actually going to be fighting the warriors but then they find out that 23:42 they're on the same side and they work together to take out the real guy who's like a [ __ ] oil baron or some [ __ ] 23:48 that it's like i can't wait to see the mousetrap montage at the end where the 23:53 warriors are helping the a-team put together their their goofy little trap to get the uh the oil barons henchmen 24:00 could be awesome need one moment where one of the warriors is playing with like three glass bottles on his fingers and he's clanking them together just not 24:07 helping and then one of the a team just comes over and just snatches him off his fingers like dude and then uses them as 24:14 i don't know like glass bullets or something i don't know and and then as as b.a barakas walks away 24:20 the warrior does that uh petulant arm cross and look at the side look at him 24:26 oh ain't i a stinker i just want that moment at the 24:33 end when they win is that they look at each other like arms crossed but then they give that like knowing nod like 24:38 okay you pass muster like you guys are you guys are chill at the very end of it man whatever 24:44 happened to terrible montages terrible goofy ass montages they are 24:50 stuff getting done so we could get to the end they went out of style and the montages are some of the best moments in 24:57 a certain generational television for sure you know what the last great montage was 25:03 it was the uh the building of the the the time machine the wrist time machines and end game 25:09 remember when hulk gave like ant-man like tacos and 25:16 the tacos were push up my glasses uh the tacos were when hulk was going on to the milano to 25:23 go to a new oh they were gonna go get thor yep um yeah i'm trying to think 25:28 there was another montage recently that it's probably like fast and furious 10 or something let's build this rocket car 25:35 right let's get this fiat into space [Laughter] 25:40 you see everybody's like doing stuff to help except for tyrese there's montage music in the background 25:46 you can't hear him talking [ __ ] but he's just talking [ __ ] the whole time see i don't i don't even want to talk [ __ ] on tyrese in those movies because like i 25:53 want his gig i want to be the guy that just [ __ ] about everything and doesn't do anything and is ineffective 25:58 throughout all the movies doesn't do anything to help but somehow just keeps getting invited to these little like 26:04 crimes like let's bring the guy that doesn't do anything and just talk [ __ ] the whole time yeah yeah we gotta have him too 26:10 it's great well we feel bad for tyrese just he can come 26:16 it's no fun unless there's somebody bitching so might as well [Laughter] 26:22 because somehow that's supposed to be entertaining i guess or whatever in the meantime you've got ludacris who's like 26:28 a street racer turned like math professor like reed richards yeah i 26:33 turned him into read like like kung fu expert reed richards 26:38 i want to see the warriors in the fast and furious movies just to see what their cars would look like 26:45 what the because part of me thinks it'd be like post-apocalyptic looking but other parts of me think this is gonna be 26:50 closer to like the car in condor man where it's just gonna have fringe everywhere and like orange and brown 26:56 there was a car in condorman yeah he had a condor car yeah he had wow if i 27:02 remember correctly it was like it looked like it was like a truck like a like a big like delivery truck um but no no no 27:08 my friend there was a hidden like [ __ ] porsche or something that had like condor wing 27:14 uh feathers all over it was it was it like the dumb and dumber dog truck 27:20 kind of but like a ferrari and feathers a super underrated uh disney classic 27:26 there condor man so i have never seen condor man all the way through but it was something that 27:32 would play on um like saturday afternoon tvs from time to time so i've seen clips 27:37 from it i i never knew if it was something i should try to catch or not did the premise 27:43 kind of strained even my youthful credulity uh i'd say that it's worth your time if you say have a couple 27:49 friends and maybe a couple beverages or other inebriates available to you then it might be a fun time to uh sit through 27:56 and enjoy uh that's definitely like a beautiful disastrous type of uh vibe there but 28:02 it's not something that you watch so if i have the time would it would i choose condor man or what i want to watch back 28:08 episodes of mighty isis uh i think actually the choice is 28:15 cleopatra 2020 uh if you are familiar at all uh yeah 28:21 cleopatra 2020 i think is from my time though i believe that's a show from like my time of watching television yes yes 28:28 as opposed to like before or so that was uh before like before 90s right yeah that was uh like late 90s that was 28:34 before gina torres joined with the firefly crew she was on cleopatra 2020. 28:40 and uh yeah that's a nice upgrade upgrade for her i think very much uh that that show 28:46 sucked um and then you get to be in the matrix so yeah yeah like a nice 28:52 well i mean when you're married to morpheus uh yeah you he can make that [ __ ] happen so 28:57 [Laughter] um i think he makes stuff happen he does he does 29:02 uh we are at the tail end of our episode here so we did not uh i don't know we laid some some golden 29:09 eggs here for disney i think for some i feel like we did i feel like we did some pretty awesome mashups for 29:16 uh uh if you go back and listen to the episode kids we had some um not really trouble with 29:22 the warriors because it ended up being a really decent episode but it was a lot of work it was to get there a lot of 29:28 consideration went into that one but i think what's worse is that as much work as the 29:34 main episode was uh your idea of incorporating breaking and breaking two into the warriors is like clearly the 29:40 best choice out of everything that we've discussed regarding the warriors and the fact that it was just an aside uh makes 29:46 everything else feel like sad and weak that's where the best stuff comes from 29:52 that's when that's where serendipity comes from yeah i want to see that breakdancing warriors movie but uh if 29:58 you have some ideas on what you want to see matched up with the warriors we want to hear it we want to hear what we missed that you think would be a good 30:04 combo platter here um also if you want to give us suggestions for future episodes of smack my pitch up we're 30:10 always interested in uh hearing what you want to see destroyed by our terrible 30:16 demented brains and uh make sure to rate review subscribe all those things you do to podcast make sure you do them for us um 30:22 on apple or stitcher wherever you get your shows and uh make sure to tell your 30:27 friends favorite places yeah and share that information with your friends on social media facebook twitter 30:34 instagram all those things follow us on twitter on facebook maybe we'll get an instagram when i have 30:40 the energy to add another social media application to my laundry list that i have currently um 30:46 i swear i've always hit us up on the twitter page and like uh talk to us talk at us yeah we like uh we like we we like 30:53 to engage we do we want to talk to you we want to hear what you have to say even if it's terrible i will tell you 30:59 you're wrong but uh but we want to hear it so until next time thank you so much dondy for um your incredible choices for 31:07 this mashup here it's my pleasure uh and we'll find you next time for another episode of smack my pitch up i'm mike 31:12 the hobbit and i'm tandy you you mashed we believe in the 31:26 guipodcast.com 31:32 a little early old in doubt and the milk bars and the 31:37 like the hobbit here low down brown inviting you to check out geek some of the influence of podcast that pairs 31:42 booze with conversation with good friends and a little nerd culture we get a lot of colorful conversation out of 31:48 our episodes but it is here for everyone no gatekeeping always level up everything we do we'll punch up never 31:55 plunge down exactly so check out geeks under the influence everywhere you get your podcast and join us or die shut the 32:02 [ __ ] up hobbit welcome to gui nights gui nights 32:09 yeah i am lowdown brown with me is always mike the hobbit this is the 32:14 tangential side of gui this is like so many of those other shows that has the after the show bit mixed with a little 32:21 bit of baywatch night so it's a little sexier it's a little bit after hours also while tying it into the previous 32:27 episode of gui so look forward to that too because this comes out the week after the flagship hour-long episode so 32:33 make sure to check out gui nights and uh when you're done you can go the [ __ ] home 32:40 my name is amy bogard and i'm mike the hobbit and we are the host of deeply upsetting where we use our expertise to 32:45 answer your most upsetting hypothetical quandaries such as what non-wigan animal deserves wings and what body part 32:52 deserves a secret mouth which cryptid is the worst roommate these questions and more that plague you will be answered on 32:58 deeply upsetting available anywhere you get your podcasts and at guipodcast.com 33:06 hey guys scotty p here with smash on your left and we are the geek fathers that's right 33:13 bringing all the trials and tribulations of being a geeky parent so welcome to our world and as always join us or cry 33:22 [Music] coming straight from the mouths of madness i'm lowdown i'm fu hunter do you 33:29 love heart we [ __ ] do so this is podcast dedicated to all things in cinematic horror we're talking movies 33:35 television composers special effects artists we're going to [ __ ] cover it so if you love more embrace the madness 33:44 in a world of blockbuster movies there's another dimension the dimension of 33:50 schlock cinema join us at beautiful disasters on a journey into the fringe 33:56 territory of b-movie abandon we review the flicks that are forgotten 34:02 or under-appreciated to give them a proper place in the annals of celeroid history 34:08 i'm the groots after you honor your guide at beautiful disasters come 34:13 along with us for a fun ride maybe be with you

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 90 - The Warriors: Practical Decisions (For My Thug Family) Hobbit and Thandi click their heels together and wish for some actually good remakes of The Wizard of Oz Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "The Voyage" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries Auto-Transcript:   0:05 the views and opinions expressed on smack my pitch up are those of the panelists and not that of the gui media 0:11 network or associated brands and sponsors listener discretion is advised this 0:17 podcast is rated r for violence language and nudity because clothing is a prison 0:23 and society will not cage me 0:34 in a world with too many reboots and remakes two men will stop at nothing 0:39 to make it even worse this is smack my picture 0:47 [Music] 0:59 hello geeks and welcome to another episode of smack my pitch up the podcast that reboots remakes reimagine sequel 1:05 cycles and adapt some of your favorite and least favorite properties from film and television and what have you and as 1:10 always i got my co-host here dandy 1:21 that line is so iconic there are people that have never even heard of this movie that know that line 1:27 yeah it is it's crazy it was been parodied a lot of places too you know like several generations of parody 1:34 without context so somebody saw the parody and then the person who grew up with the parody not 1:40 the original was parodying the parody so i i feel like it's old enough and cult classic enough that people know 1:47 it from that like kind of like soylent green as people yeah exactly people know the line without the context and that's a feeling 1:54 that i'm starting to get with a lot of movies that i grew up with where we were making a direct reference from the movie but then movies have now made references 2:00 from the movies you grew up with and the younger generation are making references from the references and it's so removed 2:07 that they're like what what do you mean batteries not included i don't know what that movie is you know there's 2:12 there's this disconnect and yeah i guess it's pop culture hurting our feelings yeah exactly 2:18 and this was one of those movies that it didn't quite hit the uh the popular culture of things but it 2:25 absolutely did uh find its way into the the zeitgeist a little bit 2:30 uh yeah very very cult classic very cold classic we're of course talking about the warriors from uh oh god when did 2:37 this come out like 78 81 81 oh wait it's like well maybe it was because i did i did 2:43 see something saying it was released in the late 70s but i also saw something that said it was released in 81 so it 2:49 could have been 78 i think there's a re-release it's not a huge release so some of those movies the technical 2:54 release date depends on where you were and uh what what you call official but 3:00 it hit oklahoma in 81 exactly right yeah the midwest finally got to see what it was like on the tough streets 3:07 [Laughter] yeah the the interesting conception of the tough streets uh 3:13 walter hill the director of this did a lot of interesting tough streets conceptions uh he was the director of 3:19 streets of fire which if you have not had the chance to see streets of fire it's 3:24 criminally unknown like it the movie nerds know it but that's about it and it is 3:30 incredible it's it is interesting it is interesting uh the warriors also has just some some 3:37 things that uh borderline exploitation like crime gritty movies weren't really doing at 3:43 the time uh like matching outfits that wasn't really yeah it's it's conception of of what 3:50 street toughs are is uh is interesting the whole thing is very village people if you take 3:57 every scene in an 80s movie like a popular 80s movie uh where there's like a punk on a bus or 4:04 the subway that's like he mean give me them groceries man and he has like a 4:09 switchblade and everybody's got a switchblade i always got a switchblade and he's like you're interested in the switchblade with your outfit and he's 4:15 like tough punk uh that is what this movie is basically it's just a bunch of 4:21 switchblade fighting movie and it's it's gang warfare but all the gangs are 4:26 various theater kids right it's like if the jets and sharks invited all their other animal friends over 4:33 to have a dance party um panthers wow yeah right 4:39 so there's a number of different gangs in this now the basic set up this movie if you're not familiar and it's not a complicated plot so i would say that 4:46 even if you haven't seen this i'd say check it out if you can before this recording but it's not there's no heavy twists 4:52 that happen here that uh that you're gonna be you're gonna be ruined for you by no it's it's 4:58 very straightforward pretty straightforward there's all these rival gangs that have been fighting in the 5:03 streets of new york forever and there's one gang uh with one leader who is 5:09 trying to unite the gangs they're like we are more powerful than the cops if we work together and a lot of these gangs 5:16 are on board they're like you know what that's fair um as long as we get our cut we're good they all meet in what central park to 5:24 have this conversation something like that something like central park have this conversation that's uh the line can you dig it comes from 5:33 that moment it's brilliant it's it's incredible it's kind of awesome yeah yeah 5:38 and i'm getting like revved up in those scenes whenever i watch it like even re-watching it for this episode i was 5:44 just like oh yeah let's take on the cops [Laughter] um 5:50 but then yeah there's there's a gang that decides that they're gonna [ __ ] with [ __ ] and they they killed dude they 5:56 killed the the the can you dig it guys cyrus take a guy yeah he has a name i know he does uh 6:02 it's cyrus cyrus that's right the murder immediately gets blamed on the warriors 6:07 which are from coney island which if you are familiar with new york is very far away from 6:12 central park it's on the other side of the city it's uh that's how you can have a 6:18 gauntlet yeah exactly you can't have a gauntlet if it's like the next two stops over that they go that'd be like the short 6:24 film version of the warriors where they get off like two stops down the subway they fight like one gang 6:30 and that's it boring movie uh so yeah yeah there's there are 25 6:35 gangs in this movie that are mentioned by name i did not go through the 25 for 6:42 the uh yeah it's so ridiculous it is so like i know it's supposed to be gritty and 6:49 maybe it it represents the grim and gritty of the era but it's so it's a 6:54 silly ass it's really a silly ass movie it's silly yes it's very very silly 7:01 it's one of those movies that somebody saw like a clockwork orange in the 70s and they're like 7:06 gangs with costumes that's brilliant let me make it gritty so that it fits into new york city and then there's either 7:13 the better they watched batman 66. right they're like oh look at the henchman that's great yeah imagine just a bunch 7:19 of henchmen gangs running running around and it's just people like face paint and like matching outfits and it's very 7:26 wonderful and it's silliness but it's not gritty really it's got a couple moments but for the most part 7:33 so the warriors are on their way to coney island they're trying to make it home where they see it as safety and in 7:38 the meantime uh the gramercy riffs who are the gang that are kind of organizing all the other gangs who has cyrus who 7:45 who gets killed uh there they believe that it was the warrior's fault there's a dj that's speaking on 7:52 the radio letting people know where the warriors might be and there's like a price on their head and everybody's trying to get the 7:57 warriors where in reality the rogues are the gang that uh 8:03 that killed cyrus and are responsible for it the rogues are trying to kill the warriors before the warriors can rat out 8:10 the rogues remember because intrigue because did the 8:16 warriors know directly before the end of the movie like other people did the the the warriors know that the rogues were 8:22 the ones who killed sorry i don't think they did if i remember i think they did see them 8:28 kill yeah because they were right next to the rogues that's why the rogues blamed the warriors is because the warriors saw them do it 8:34 if i remember yeah but they never mentioned that they never mentioned that the rogues are the ones who did it until 8:40 the end of the movie where the rogues show up and they're like they're like why'd you do it man and and i thought it was context that 8:47 yeah no it was not mentioned before then i don't think but uh i i love the greatest excuse ever i actually do like 8:52 this because it's like people just do dumb [ __ ] sometimes he's like we just we just felt like it like it 8:58 wasn't politically motivated it wasn't because they disagreed with cyrus they were like we just like doing stuff like 9:04 that yeah he's he's the i like to do bad things kid yeah great yeah he's he's the 9:09 kid that likes to burn stuff and you're like burning stuff he was like because it's fun you're like okay cool 9:15 yeah that dude was ridiculous that actor was ridiculous he was having so much fun in that role and i think it's part of 9:22 the reason why this movie is a classic but with this i mean this is such a irresponsible film to try to remake 9:29 because of the number of people that are in this it's such an ensemble piece yeah i hated that i hated that so much uh so 9:36 much i had to take a totally different approach to my normal style of casting which then also changed kind of my ideas 9:43 on what to do with this film so i have two [ __ ] weird choices here uh for my 9:48 re remaking or reima definitely a reimagining of the warriors here did you 9:53 kind of stick to i don't know like nice costumes and and grit or what 10:00 is it a 70s period piece or did you modernize this uh so 10:05 my film is modernized it still moves in the same way like 10:11 if the script were beat for beat it would basically be the same movie but it's modern and the context of everything is 10:17 completely different okay uh my context is definitely different as well uh i think 10:24 the the like gangs thing is i don't know how that really translates to 2022 10:30 really had to try problems with the the whole conception as well like um the big thing for me was and i don't know even 10:37 what it's like in the modern time but there was a switchover from and this was before the warriors 10:43 before the warriors period of time there's a switch over from street gangs being uh just a group that 10:49 either protected their turf or their neighborhood and then might have done like stick ups and like petty larceny or 10:56 whatever to being the protection arm of the drug trade is what street gangs 11:01 became became more organized and more like more martial basically 11:09 they're not the same thing like the fact that there's only one or maybe two guns in the whole movie 11:15 just super odd to me and the fact that these gangs aren't 11:21 organized around anything like gangs are organized around yeah turf or territory or whatever but it's around acquisition 11:28 in the modern time it's about protecting the money coming in from the drug trade so yeah it felt like nonsense to me it 11:34 felt like it was probably people remembering the new york of a different time 11:40 like in new york city in the city proper i'm sure that there were like housing developments and projects and stuff 11:45 where people of various races were kind of crowded together poor people but i feel like a lot of the white folks moved 11:52 out of those areas way before the warriors period of time sure so you 11:58 have gangs that are very racially centralized um like i was 12:03 talking to my girlfriend she's from new york about what street gangs look like in her era and she's like no it was as far as is 12:10 white people coming together to do a thing gang wise it was mostly like we hate 12:17 the other people that live in the other areas that's what their gangs came around yeah came together around so 12:23 yeah the white gangs were the ones that had like surprisingly short haircuts 12:28 yeah they're like like italians or skinheads yeah yeah pretty much uh yeah that was kind of a challenge to 12:34 figure out how to do that i think i found my lead in is that they don't i guess gangs but not like street gangs i 12:41 is that the difference there that i did is um i'm sure yes there are still uh gangs 12:47 there are groups of people that commit crime uh but it's not the same as it was like 12:52 this movie portrays like it was in the 70s or the 80s it's it's a survival tactic and also like not 12:59 something that i really want to sensationalize in that way and well you know the book was written in the mid 60s and it's probably based off 13:06 of a conception of gangs from like the fifth from the fonzier because you know fonzie was basically in a street gang a 13:13 so it is it's based on a conception that is rooted in even an even older 13:18 conception of what street gangs and gang crime is sure when you're looking 13:24 at post-world war ii there were a lot of uh soldiers that came back from the war that felt kind of directionless and 13:30 also had that taste of like normal life just didn't really fit into their experience anymore and so that's when 13:36 the birth of like biker culture bikers yeah and you're seeing a lot of people like um 13:42 picking up all the what they have and going on the road and joining other bikers and getting by 13:48 through yeah drug trade was a big part of it um arms dealing was a big part of it 13:54 and uh that fed into gangs in general to have some sort of like affiliation 14:00 uh but yeah that that was by the 70s and 80s that level of like having a brand 14:07 uh got to at best having like a common color that was like to represent who you 14:13 affiliate with but besides that it was not some you know stenciling logos on backs of jackets and [ __ ] like that was 14:19 not unless you were a hell's angel but by then it was like an incorporated brand 14:24 sure the hell's angels by the 70s the hells angels were literally but literally did security for 14:30 a rolling stones concert so that's uh it's different animal uh not 14:36 to say that they there weren't still and still are some things probably going on in that 14:42 realm that are uh not not exactly above board but oh they controlled the meth trade back then um but yeah they i mean 14:49 the the guys in the gang got older it became no longer just a street gang you got to make practical decisions for your 14:55 thug family yeah exactly practical decisions for my thug family yes um 15:01 so for mine i i'm just gonna dive into mine because uh it shouldn't take too long there's a lot 15:07 a lot of names to list but uh i decided instead of casting in the way that i normally do where it's the main 15:13 characters going through and just hitting seven of the you know most important 15:19 characters it was the different groups that were kind of important in this like swan is important he's the leader of the 15:24 warriors and all that but like he's he's not that important you know like the the the gang is the important 15:31 part their their affiliation together how they fight together and so i thought yeah how can i incorporate 15:37 groups of people that i we know that are familiar with one another in a way that 15:42 they're the different gangs and then i started thinking about anchorman uh and the famous uh anchorman fight 15:49 between all the different news channels and i'm like there's something there brilliant there's something there 15:54 uh and so i decided that the the bringing in swinging will smith too yeah exactly right 16:00 he's mysteriously absent from this adaptation um so my idea is that we said it in modern 16:06 day new york where the splinter factions that we deal with aren't street gangs at this point but political affiliations 16:13 and more so than any other uh overarching politic 16:19 group is like democrats and then left-leaning tend to have very specific 16:24 things that they're fighting for whether it be legalization of marijuana or or are gay rights or uh the green new deal 16:32 and all of these are very important but they're so fractured from one another that there's not a lot of chance for 16:37 them to get along and actually like join together and do something um there's a lot of a lot of infighting that's 16:43 happening so i'm taking the inspiration from the original warriors and applying it to a fractured um and broken 16:50 political system and uh infighting that happens uh within a singular party and 16:56 uh so these are all different groups that um are supporting 17:03 different like lobbies that are fighting in new york city there's a big protest happening uh to fight against like an 17:10 oncoming war that should be happening you know that we're about to go into and whether or not to go into war and whether or not uh to 17:18 take money out of certain budgets and lobbyists are going crazy and it's kind of like seattle uh back when the 17:25 wto was doing stuff and there was like oh yeah the other the no go zone or whatever yeah so it's got that kind of 17:32 energy going on for it and it's just these like politicos it's lobbyists it's uh it's politically motivated people 17:38 reporters that are all kind of part of these different groups and so the warriors are actually just like the 17:44 seasoned um like activists and uh and lobbyists that are like 17:50 trying to do like the green new deal they're trying to like protect the environment they've been through it 17:55 they've they've been ridden hard and put away wet they're uh but they're still like in the game 18:01 they're they're not burned out yet they're still believing what they believe in the gramercy riffs are like the old head near retirement they're 18:08 trying to get the new big hitters in town to like rally together to try to actually stand up together and get stuff 18:14 done uh the rogues are just the like i would say wall street bro type uh 18:21 lobby contingency uh-huh that yeah just very kind of woeful wall street uh you 18:28 just like really uh alpha male energy you know toxic male kind of vibe to them 18:34 then there's the turnbull acs which the only thing that they had going for them in the original 18:40 i think it was the bus right yeah they were like bald the slow moving bus the slowing boss of bald dudes i think was 18:46 the only thing um so sure we'll just make them we'll make 18:51 them all balding but prematurely balding not like shaved head balding but like 18:56 horseshoe balding yeah like me yeah yeah and then we've got the 19:02 orphans um which are just like a kind of a gaggle of the leftovers that get thrown 19:07 together of just all the the forgotten ones and then the baseball furies these are the the big badasses the billy 19:14 badasses of uh the groups that are coming after the the warriors uh they're 19:20 uh big tobacco they're big firearms they're the big heavy duty lobbies that 19:27 are coming after them then we've got the lizzie's and that is [ __ ] hats that is women's rights uh 19:35 body autonomy like stuff that you know what's that like uh second wave feminism 19:40 i think so yeah yeah something that's what's funny is a lot of the stuff is stuff i actually like do care about and 19:46 do believe in but tone is to be this like absurdist lens on 19:53 extreme micro advocacy where it's this one one issue and that's the only 19:59 issue that i'm going to focus on and no other issue and then everything else becomes almost a a challenge to you your 20:05 voice being heard um is kind of the point of this film so just to go through so it's a political 20:10 film it's making some political points about like sometimes you've got to be able to compromise with people to get anything done 20:16 and sometimes it's with people that you actually agree with you just have to like give just enough and but it's also going to be very funny 20:23 uh for the warriors i am getting the a few of the regular hitters from the 20:29 jud apatow crew to show up for this uh we've got seth rogen jonah hill jay barachel 20:36 martin starr jason siegel and christopher mintz ploss as the warriors 20:41 yeah that's that sounds about right yeah yeah i could see that 20:47 and they're they're they're like the the new hot kids in town uh they still they haven't burned out quite yet but they're 20:53 seasoned enough that people know not to mess with them you know they got that green new deal energy you know um 20:58 [Laughter] and then the gramercy riffs the old heads the ones that you know 21:04 can tell them young whipper snappers a thing or two uh about what it's like in the in the uh trenches we've got 21:10 the adam mckay crowd uh we've got will ferrell paul rudd steve carell tim meadows vince vaughn 21:18 and john c riley i'm loving it so these are you know comedic actors that i've 21:23 loved for decades that are you know in their 50s or 60s and 21:28 have served their time for sure but still keep coming out and just killing it killing the game so i feel like this 21:34 movie got made a decade ago and i missed it i just missed it uh then we've got the the rogues and 21:41 that's the uh wall street energy douchebro kind of vibe and i thought it 21:48 would be really fun to see what broken lizard could do with that so we've got uh jay chandisekar kevin heffernan paul 21:55 stoder steve lemmy eric still uh stalansky and and then threw in brian 22:01 cox for good measure uh since he was in in super troopers just to be the like douchebag 22:08 slick back hair like lobby for wall street kind of deal with the jp morgan and uh lobbyist 22:15 people in the uh in the movie gordon gekko american psycho energy yeah 22:20 and just let him just let him go big let him just do [ __ ] all of that and i 22:25 think it would be they would have so much fun with it and i'm here for it 22:30 uh then we've got the turnbill acs these are the balding ones and uh they're gonna be awkward and weird um and 22:39 not in a lot of the movies so i wanted a contingency that can do a lot with a little uh so i decided to do mike judges 22:46 uh regular hitters from some of his movies so we've got ron livingston 22:51 jason bateman tj miller thomas middle ditch kumail nanjiani and jimmy yo yang as the 22:59 uh as the turnbull ac's that's awesome i think your movie just got cancelled just 23:04 got cancelled because of tj miller 23:10 damn dude well trust me like this is a budget they wouldn't be able to afford anyway with all these 23:16 are you kidding me um you can shoot the movie then you have to go back and replace uh tj miller with 23:22 tig notaro after the movie's already shot you have the green screen take notaro in 23:27 i would make the accidental choice of just replacing uh tj miller with all the footage they took out of aquaman two of 23:33 amber heard and then they have to replace that 23:39 she's a monster uh then she should she should have been on the uh on the the rogues team i think 23:45 uh with all the wall street dudes if if uh we're talking monsters here but uh oh yeah yeah so that's the 23:52 turbulencies the orphans i wanted the weird ones that they're they're funny they're uh they're 23:58 respected but they're definitely not playing in the same spaces of comedy as 24:04 the uh as the other people like apatow and mckay they can kind of like intermingle broken lizard can jump into 24:09 some stuff but uh wes anderson's tribe is doing a totally different type of comedy uh than 24:15 the rest of them it's like affluent quiet white humor and uh 24:21 so for for that of course wes sanderson's regular hitters jason schwartzman bill murray luke and owen 24:26 wilson angelica houston and willem dafoe as the orphans uh gang 24:32 [Laughter] the geriatric or the geriatric performance 24:39 we're looking for mummies and daddy i just want to see like bill murray sitting there just like eating a bag of 24:44 popcorn and then jason schwartzman just like we just need to be taken seriously and it was like you're not you're not 24:51 i'm sorry [Laughter] uh then the baseball fury's this was very fun to cast 24:58 because there are a few comedic actors that uh are also like built like a brick 25:05 [ __ ] house um or actors that can do comedy really well that are very 25:10 very muscular and so i just like it was just all carrot top infinite carrot top just one carrot top 25:16 actually i did add him to this so good good on you 25:21 [Laughter] it's carrot top terry crews uh chris hemsworth 25:28 dave bautista john cena and the rock yeah how perfect can you get i mean and 25:34 i think i even listed them from like small to big [Laughter] 25:40 yeah i think it would be just really funny that they've got that like badass energy where they're just 25:45 they're coming after them with baseball bats and they've got their faces half painted and they're coming after the uh the warriors uh during this whole like 25:53 standoff thing that's happening yeah it's just the the biggest action stars that and carrot top that you could 25:59 hope for [Laughter] and then finally that's too scary for this fun movie yeah no [ __ ] right could 26:05 you imagine being like the [ __ ] mike judge crew and then and then 26:11 the the baseball furies show up uh like all like 18 feet tall like brick [ __ ] 26:17 house having jason bateman trying to talk him down right and and ended up ending up looking like 26:24 the dave chappelle attacker oh [ __ ] like he comes off as condescending even when he doesn't 26:30 intend to be so yeah yeah that's not well that's his bag that's his uh his acting bag that's nice niche you're 26:37 you're uh your group's bard uh that's not who you send out to negotiate 26:42 uh finally we got the lizzie's and so i just i picked some like amazing uh comedic actresses to be in the lizzie's 26:49 gang uh so of course tina fey and amy pola are in there that seemed like a no-brainer we also got kristen wiig 26:56 rashida jones leslie jones and christian stahl and nice i think for even as smaller role as the 27:03 lizzie's role is that powder keg of funny would probably be the scene stealer in a [ __ ] half 27:09 against all these other ones that are like trying to individually smirk at the screen those ladies would just [ __ ] blow it 27:15 out of the park i think um yeah at this because this is really interesting are you imagining this as a 27:21 series of comedic encounters with each one individually or does the overarching 27:27 plot have them all come together and be like um part of the whole story 27:32 um i was thinking that the barest of chances of this being made uh having 27:37 individual encounters is a better choice because there's a lot of favors that can be called in for this kind of movie that people would be like okay so it's only 27:43 like four days of shooting yeah i can i can block off four days to come in there and just do like you know a 10-minute 27:50 scene and then call it a day uh and you've got enough people that i mean imagine two hours of this i mean if this 27:57 was all on the screen at the same time for even a ten minute portion of this movie it's 28:02 too much it's too many [ __ ] people it's it's the most expensive movie ever made with 28:07 no cgi exactly so individual individual experiences a 28:12 little bit of overlap just like in the original movie that i think it's what the orphans and the lizzies i think 28:18 are around each other at the same time there's some back and forth of course the gramercy riffs and the rogues and the warriors 28:24 are all there at the same time so there's some of that but um also you're seeing like broken lizard 28:30 the adam mckay crowd and the judd apatow crowd all on the screen at the same time just doing their thing would be [ __ ] 28:36 amazing oh definitely it would be interesting to kind of play up what was so 28:43 funny about the anchorman fight scene who uh adam mckay is the 28:48 director that seemed like a no-brainer it's political it's funny um he did anchorman as well 28:54 and you play up the political angle you play up the the silliness that was in the anchorman fight scene but then with 29:01 these little individual dips in between the fights where you have these actors being able to just have their like spotlight moment 29:08 where they just do like a riff they do a thing they have like a smaller not group ensemble moment and just let them cut 29:14 [ __ ] fly and i think you're gonna get some magic out of it um you're gonna have some actors for sure that are like worth way 29:21 more than they're getting on screen where they're on there and they have like one line and that's it and the joke 29:26 is that they're there and they have one line yeah so but but with uh with an adam mckay movie where 29:34 i think he does a lot of even though it's scripted letting people just do their thing 29:40 and so people are that are very experienced as actors tend to bring out their natural charm 29:47 if they know they make them under their money off of doing their natural charm thing so yeah i think that would work out and i 29:53 was extraordinarily well you're getting these improvisational actors they're all good at improving on set 29:59 and you get them to face each other in like a standoff fight uh so they're gonna be doing that same 30:06 thing with their wit as well and just bringing like just trying to outdo each other with the most ridiculous [ __ ] you 30:11 can think of um so i i could see this being just like almost too funny 30:18 with the just like there wouldn't be the breaks that you need in between laughter because everybody's just like going full 30:23 speed ahead with this so i don't know too many big guns trying to out shoot each other exactly yeah so 30:28 i kind of want to see what that looks like and it might be a train wreck but [ __ ] it will be a fun train wreck 30:34 yeah so so it's it's basically the warriors plot but instead of like gangs fighting over who killed the uh 30:43 the cyrus it was bringing all the gangs together it was a you know a politician that was shot and it being blamed on 30:50 the warriors contingency of like green new deal people and uh them trying to get away while 30:57 other people are trying to use them getting caught as like an angle for their own advocacy that they're doing so 31:03 they're everybody's trying to and of course instead of the radio dj person it's a it's a [ __ ] like 31:08 alex jones live streamer type that's out there just trying to like chase him down on live tv 31:14 so and you can even have yeah as jk simmons uh and he could do basically the same thing he's doing in 31:20 the spider-man universe right now uh that's who came to mind immediately yeah well you know that's how they did 31:26 politics in the gangs of new york era anyway so they're and even after that 31:32 there's a president for that kind of thing politics through the the bat 31:37 through this the stickball bat and there's still some countries that do that so 31:42 oh yeah yeah sometimes ours yeah uh well i mean the way things are going but that's a that's 31:48 a different podcast [Laughter] uh so yeah that's my my [ __ ] 31:55 train wreck of a uh comedy take on the warriors what do you got for yours all 32:00 right so like i said i i really had some trouble uh latching onto this and it was 32:05 the whole gang thing just didn't work for me so i uh 32:10 i kind of called an audible and uh you know if you've never listened to our podcast before we do 32:17 some mashups as part of the uh the format so i just i just decided to start with the mashup okay 32:23 basically my movie is a sequel to the purge movies 32:29 it's okay the purge the warriors and 32:34 so you'll see some characters from some of the other one characters just particular but you'll see some characters from some of 32:40 the other purge movies come in and basically in in response to the purge day um and 32:48 the new founding fathers initiative to you know purge sin through excess 32:54 groups have sprung up in various communities that their whole thing is they train all year to protect their 33:00 community like gangs like gangs of old they're they they just gather together to 33:06 protect their community they're marshall they're well trained uh they're ready to to kill on purge night 33:12 because you can but in defense they're not going out and killing random people sure they're killing in defense of their 33:18 community and as this movement has grown to have like a community defense force basically 33:24 the community defense force is loosely organized in a specific area they have a community 33:30 meeting of the community defense forces under those circumstances 33:36 the leader of the community defense force in that area which is loosely around new york 33:41 gets murdered uh the leader gets murdered off-screen because the leader is uh the leader of what was 33:48 functionally that in the actual purge movies and that actor is dead um 33:53 it was michael kenneth williams was uh carmelo johns and in the purge anarchy 33:59 he was like the the quiet viral leader of an anti-purge movement okay yeah so uh he was the he's 34:08 the head of this this organizing principle he's murdered they think it's the warriors who were 34:14 just another community defense force it wasn't the warriors it was a plant 34:20 gang so somebody who else somebody else who looks like a community defense force but is not 34:27 they are placed there by the money and influence of the founding fathers to 34:32 shake up and destroy the organization of these uh community defenders i 34:38 i don't know that seems a little more complicated than i don't know we just like doing stuff like that [Laughter] 34:46 so they uh they spend the night trying to both fend off purgers 34:53 both individual and organized and other community defense forces that are coming after them for killing uh 35:00 carmelo johns um so as 35:05 uh my warriors as the leader of the g-riffs or that they're just called the geores 35:10 or not the gramercy riffs uh is um a character who was in was it called 35:16 the first purge he rose over the course of movie from being a gang leader to being like a 35:22 leader leader oh right okay putting him in a position that he was probably 35:27 doing something like this after that movie uh is ilan noel dimitri 35:33 uh i forget what his character's name is but he will be the leader of the gramercy riffs so everybody 35:38 you know the scenes that cut back to him as they're trying to find the warriors to the e through the evening that'll be 35:44 him nice and then for my warriors this is what made this project 35:50 difficult i already was having trouble latching on to it and then finding these appropriately young actors for like a 35:57 gang style thing uh it it hurt it broke me 36:03 but uh going through the characters uh first cast i cast rembrandt uh rembrandt is significant to me in the 36:12 original warriors movies because the actor that played rembrandt is one of the two actors that i actually 36:18 recognized from that movie uh and he played one of the members of the bloodhound gang on three two one 36:24 contact really like yeah he was one of the members of the bloodhound king so pbs guy 36:30 uh very gay unfortunately died of aids in like 86. 36:35 oh so he was taken way too soon but uh as rembrandt 36:41 we have jaden smith so he's the tagger guy jaden smith as vermin 36:48 who was a significant character he didn't do a specific thing he was just around for the the full movie uh we have 36:55 from cobra kai uh he plays robbie is tanner buchanan okay yeah 37:01 uh as ajax who is the rapist dude who got off really easy in the warriors 37:07 like when the police came and got him i was like wow you got off really easy because you could have easily been murdered by anybody in this 37:13 entire movie including your own guys and nobody would have batted an eyelash um 37:19 and actually james remar i believe is the actor who played him and that's the only other actor i recognized 37:25 in the warriors um he's played a bunch of stuff he was like raiden to 37:30 and um mortal kombat annihilation oh wow i think i blocked all of that movie out of 37:36 my brain at this point he was the uh he was the alfred like character in uh the black lightning on 37:42 the black lightning tv show he's been in a bunch of stuff throughout his career but uh as ajax i have cameron monahan 37:51 now you probably don't know that name because i only recognized him from one thing but he was 37:57 basically the joker on gotham he played a character called jeremiah and then later on he played jeremiah's twin 38:03 brother after jeremiah was murdered and they're both basically proto-jokers yep 38:08 so he's ajax as swann i have uh somebody a little bit more famous 38:14 one direction's harry styles is swan wow and you may know him as 38:22 uh star fox from the eternals if you were able to sit all the way through that boring ass movie uh he was in 38:28 dunkirk and i'm sure he's been in some other stuff but those are his big appearances uh dunkirk and and the eternals two 38:35 slow-ass movies although i will say though dunkirk was slow still very i like dunkirk a lot i liked it a little 38:41 bit it's beautiful it's very slow-paced but it's technically style over substance like like 38:47 uh what's his face um his clockwork movies that is like the uh the apotheosis of 38:55 of the the clockwork nature of the movies that he makes and i i love it i 39:00 think dunkirk is awesome um for cochise which was the black guy who got more 39:08 screen time than the other black guys uh we have [Laughter] 39:13 none of them had like a super significant role but cochise is the black guy who got the most screen time of out of all the black guys that's 39:19 what's funny is like this is like gangs in the like late 70s early 80s in new york city 39:25 and like cyrus is a black dude that's like bringing all the gangs together with like can you dig it and they're 39:30 like sure yeah no i can like four other black dudes 39:36 well the the the leader of the uh the initial leader of the warriors was black but they take him off they like just 39:41 take him out they take him out and he's taken out off screen yeah like you're like this guy's significant 39:47 give him at least a warrior's death or something no they just they just take him out and he's just gone from the 39:52 movie he demanded too much services so they just kicked him off the movie [Laughter] 39:59 you had two hot dogs you're only supposed to have one and a fruit cup he's like i want two fruit cups 40:05 you're out we got swan to do it you were supposed to leave pineapple for everybody else you took too much pineapple but as my 40:12 cochise uh ashton sanders uh ashton sanders played the middle age version of 40:20 uh sharon from moonlight so you have the the little kid version the high school version the adult 40:27 version he was the high school version okay okay i mean he's like 28 or something now but 40:32 at the time you know he was he was very young um as mercy and in my movie mercy is 40:38 actually a member of the warriors she's not like a prostitute that they kind of bring in or is fawning after one of 40:45 their warriors as mercy i have yara shahidi who is uh yeah 40:50 she's from blackish and uh what's her show grown-ish grown-ish yeah i think i've cast her in 40:56 a couple things great actress um yeah especially very pretty and uh yeah she's a good actress the 41:01 only other person i cast is the villain the main villain which is luther 41:07 and that is uh montana jordan and he's the older brother on young sheldon 41:13 i've not watched a single moment of young sheldon so i have no frame of reference 41:18 i've seen a little bit but uh at that point i was flat you know how hard it is to like just recognize actors as they're 41:25 growing like unless you watch tv because that's where these people start i don't watch any tv then you don't 41:32 get to see these actors grow to the point where they get to take on movie roles and uh so 41:38 finding actors under 30 i was going to say like under 25 but now it's like fighting actors under 30 is hard as [ __ ] 41:46 yeah well especially uh the actors that under 30 that are you know worth their their salt uh you 41:53 don't want to keep reusing them and stuff you need a bigger cycle of and just younger 41:58 actors there's the ones that everybody pins their stuff to and then there's all the other actors that are in like one thing and you don't know the face and 42:05 it's it it takes time for somebody to uh to find their project that boom blows 42:11 them out across the landscape but basically uh in my movie 42:17 in my story the warriors do survive the night at the end of the movie uh 42:23 as the the purge end of the purge clackson is ringing 42:28 they find and kill not just the warriors but all of the community organizations find and kill the 42:35 infiltrators knowing that they were actually the ones who uh killed the cyrus character 42:41 carmelo johns nice the purge is over the traitors have been dealt with 42:47 happy ending no because the new founding fathers uh drone strike the area that all of the 42:54 community uh leaders are in and kill them because the purge must continue and they're the 42:59 people in power so sure that that's the end of the movie damn you nuked him 43:05 yeah did you just pull the end of the return of the living dead movie or just just nuke him that's fine 43:11 so i've got this thing where it and it's it's not healthy but i feel like just uh 43:18 a sad ending or an unhappy ending is more satisfying because it feels more genuine i get that so you notice with a 43:25 lot of my movies they they all end like oh we're gonna have a great time everything's oh no 43:31 oh no now that's that's bad everything's bad it's like there are as it should be there are two different types of people 43:36 and there's a different ending to the movie brazil for each one of them 43:43 the happy ending and the definitely not happy ending so yeah awesome i dig that i disappointed myself 43:50 on the fact that i didn't think of the purge at all when coming up with concepts for this because that's such a 43:56 that's such a obvious uh turn you know that you can yeah it's 44:02 it's a good modern fit in my mind but like i said i was just i was having trouble wrapping my mind around this 44:07 this ancient concept of what street gangs are and it just made it hard to 44:13 it made it hard to do this for me i'm like if we make a warriors movie about street gangs i don't know what street 44:18 gangs look like in 2022 like they sell drugs and make money but i 44:24 don't even know what the culture looks like that surrounds that because i don't listen to the kids music you know i've 44:30 seen some of their rappers they don't look tough but i'm sure that anybody can be tough with a gun and yeah so i don't 44:35 know we are not of the age to be able to write like really affecting uh stories about like gang violence in america in 44:42 2022. like we're yeah we yeah we don't have that uh we could maybe make a movie about gang violence in the 90s as it 44:50 translates to 2022 and then it'd be all wrong and people would come and see it and be like what are you talking about 44:55 old man it would be funny basically like they did with the warriors yeah how out of touch it is would be pretty [ __ ] 45:00 funny um okay so we've got our real takes out of uh out of the way here i think both are 45:07 really interesting um plays on the warriors and also further proof of like this was a hard one to adapt 45:14 it is really it's a very period specific movie and so yeah try to put that in a modern light either that or you're doing 45:21 it as a period piece that takes place in like late 70s early 80s and in which case what are you doing to uh 45:27 improve the story like what are what are you doing if you're making it a period piece is there something else that wasn't said this is a pretty simple film 45:34 it wasn't trying to say a lot it was uh yeah if you make it a period movie it's the warriors 45:40 exactly so i don't want to say it's a perfect movie but it does what it does very effectively yeah and i don't think it 45:46 needs to be remade to be the same kind of movie it would need to say something else so 45:52 my remix definitely says something else and that's the next part that we're going into is our remix remix 46:00 wiki wiki i need to wear jackets so i can just do the zipper thing for the remix 46:06 we'll remember that for next time yeah i'm sure that will only be a help uh or some corduroy so you can wipe your 46:11 sleeves together and you know i used to do that when i wore corduroy back in my youth 46:17 it's a shameful it's an example of my oldness because i had corduroy as well okay cool 46:24 i think it's it's a place in time so my remix uh we are going to the land 46:29 of fantasy a little bit and i wanted to imagine what happens when you take the premise of the 46:36 warriors and you don't do a whole lot of difference to it but you make it in a more uh post-apocalyptic dystopian 46:43 environment and let's say if you were to uh look at 46:48 as a blueprint on how to do this movie uh beyond thunderdome that there's just these little burrows 46:55 in new york that are controlled by powerful uh divas that are 47:00 maintaining different boroughs of new york and they're fighting amongst one another until one diva stands up above 47:05 all of them and says we can work together and we'll have more power until somebody kills that diva and then it's 47:13 such a tragedy that uh the basically the whole world turns on that gang uh to try 47:18 to get them because the diva is dead and so you need a diva that that's a believable response that 47:26 if that happened to them the world would burn um it would just burn down 47:31 and uh so oh they killed beyonce that's yeah uh grammar series 47:36 uh osiris in this version of of this uh film is uh beyonce because i mean really 47:44 i was thinking of doing like a classic diva like a diana ross or a madonna or something but i wanted it to stay 47:50 relatively modern um with the characters and who's a bigger 47:57 diva like queen than beyonce and like no one other oh your breadcrumb controlled my mind and made me choose the right 48:03 answer um yeah beyonce like other divas bow to 48:09 her so um it's made sense that and also beyonce though very talented not a 48:14 terrible actress but also not the most historically uh involved in film she did an austin 48:21 powers movie and i think that was about it yeah beyonce was never uh a good actress 48:28 she's i don't think she had the potential to be a good actress yeah that's that was just i think we talked about this before but that's just not 48:33 her particular bag yeah so giving her a smaller role that's still very important 48:39 it made sense to me but uh the gangs i just took kind of like the 48:44 leaders of the gangs are they uh are the pop divas and then you fill them in with their dancers 48:49 as uh as the rest of the gang uh so this is gonna be a musical oh yeah 100 it's gonna be 48:55 musical um and so for the warriors i wanted yeah a 49:03 modern but relative still relatively seasoned uh pop singer that can you know maybe take the helm of like leader of 49:10 pop um as so many are wanted to do so gaga is uh the warriors i knew it 49:18 yeah a surprisingly good actress uh so she can deal with the amount of screen time that swan has uh for the warriors 49:26 he is a good actress yep and of course gaga is going to be part of this conversation when you're talking pop divas 49:32 for the rogues for the uh for the the gang that pinned the murder of beyonce on poor lady gaga 49:40 uh that was all billy eilish's fault feeling the new kid on the block that just likes 49:46 to cause trouble um we've got bailey because she likes doing stuff like that 49:52 yeah and then she's actually not bad when she was on snl she was actually pretty decent i was surprised no i 49:57 honestly like everything i've seen from her i think she gets picked on just because she's not really problematic like she's 50:04 she makes music with her brother and like is pretty chill 50:10 probably smokes a vape pen plays video games you know uh so for the turnbull acs that's the the 50:16 the bus band of of of narrative wells um i not for any particular reason aside from 50:23 that she had to be in this film and uh there wasn't anything about her specifically that fit any particular 50:30 uh grouping but i think she would have a lot of fun just doing a song behind a bus chasing down uh lady gaga would be 50:37 very funny um lizzo is the leader you know what's funny like i'm saying these 50:42 in my head as you're going through the situations and i picked that one too that is 50:48 see what that means is this is meant to be made this uh this pop diva post-apocalyptic warriors 50:55 remake needs to be made then we've got the the orphans uh you want somebody that's a little bit tragic 51:02 that is gonna feel like you know leaning against a window while it's raining kind of vibe to it uh as as the 51:09 orphans so of course i had to go with adele for that one oh yeah yeah oh yeah yeah 51:14 yeah yeah and then uh to counter that the baseball furies you you got aggro you got some [ __ ] 51:21 edge um a force to be reckoned with so rihanna 51:27 is uh the leader of the baseball furies oh she does have the energy she does she had well when you sing songs about whips 51:33 and chains exciting you uh you should probably have a little bit of that aggro edge and then uh the lizzie's 51:40 girl power uh in the warriors and uh in a movie that is all about girl power you 51:45 need somebody that is ultimate like [ __ ] like girl pop diva power so i'm uh i'm 51:50 bringing her back from a lot of challenges she's run into in the last few years britney spears is 51:56 leading the list oh and i own her a bone i well and i thought about turnbull acs but 52:02 considering they were all bald in the original movie i didn't want to make that the joke 52:08 if the leader of the bald group would be just a little too insensitive so 52:14 uh the lizzie's made made plenty of sense too so yeah britney spears uh welcome you are clearly if you're 52:20 talking about iconic pop divas britney spears is absolutely part of the conversation try to remember uh britney 52:25 spears has actually acted in stuff i think i think she was on a few things in her era 52:30 she was in a movie called crossroads where she 52:36 did a karaoke cover of i love rock and roll in the movie and when she was asked if she 52:42 had a choice in what song to sing in the karaoke scene um 52:48 she said yes um and i picked i love rock and roll because i love pat benatar 52:53 and that broke my heart as a joan jet fan so she was a young person she didn't know yeah she she was 53:00 like probably like 17 when that movie came out so can't hold too much of a grudge but yeah 53:06 so that's that's my pop diva post-apocalyptic musical and i actually found an actor that has worked with most 53:13 of these uh women on music videos and is also a very comp accomplished uh 53:18 director that has dealt with a lot of dystopian and post-apocalyptic properties so talk about a perfect 53:24 [ __ ] match um the director of hunger games catching fire i am legend 53:29 constantine mockingjay also directed videos for amongst a plenty of others 53:34 but shakira janet jackson jennifer lopez pink alanis morissette britney spears 53:40 avril lavigne gwen stefani and plenty of others is uh francis lawrence is the 53:45 director oh my so it was kind of like the perfect combination of things you've got dystopian you've got 53:51 post-apocalyptic you've got girl power girl powers yeah 53:56 it's it's kind of a no-brainer uh slam dunk there and francis lawrence and company if you think that this is 54:03 something that is worth going for um i can't write any music that's not my that's not my angle but if you can just 54:09 throw story by on there and throw me a few bucks i'll uh i'll happily give you the right you know that movie 54:15 would make so much money it would make so much money so much money it would 54:21 make incredible amounts of money it would be like the pop diva movie of all time it would be incredible 54:28 and the and the costuming i mean there'd be wardrobe people from every corner of 54:33 the earth trying to work on this set for all the the tina turner beyond thunderdome post-apocalyptic pop diva 54:41 energy would be oh my god incredible yeah i mean even if if each artist only 54:46 used their own like uh cadre of stylists there'd still be like a hundred thousand 54:52 people employed by this this movie yep that costume changes oh my god 54:57 ridiculous breakaway skirts like there'd be all sorts of crazy amazing [ __ ] that would be going on with this so um a 55:04 spectacle a spectacled scene that would be the weirdest choice this like 200 55:09 million dollar movie with the biggest pop divas of all time uh based on a 55:14 little indie uh cult classic film from the late 70s early 80s yeah 55:21 yeah you get some k-pop stars in there you have like a movie that'd be bigger than avatar 55:26 right oh no [ __ ] you get the and fair enough i'm not ever gonna [ __ ] with the k-pop stands yeah cool but you put your 55:35 put your folks in there that's great um or you just have a remake of this 55:40 movie uh with just the k-pop bands and there you go cool everybody's happy 55:46 yeah my my girlfriend would make me definitely make me see that movie with herself 55:52 so for your remix what are we looking at are you is there's a pop diva centric like mine or 55:57 oh it's so close it's so close but it's so not at all not even a little bit um 56:02 so for my remake i wanted to once again around the concept of where 56:09 people gathered to form uh coalitions of common interest 56:14 my movie is it's about gamers okay 56:19 and a third of the movie takes place in the real world 56:24 and and two-thirds of the movie takes place in the game um 56:29 the in the game portion will be strictly like um pixar level cgi 56:36 uh the in the world of portion will be really intentionally static and plain 56:42 the actors who live in the end of the world in the world portion 56:47 don't do anything like i want the the in-game portion to be big and bombastic with orchestral 56:54 music and special effects everything and then periodically the movie cuts to the 57:00 person at their computer kind of just sitting there like a lump like a computer zombie like pressing the 57:06 keyboard and grunting or whatever nice so it's kind of an irreverent gamer 57:14 comedy like in the vein of free guy but it's it's more crass it's meaner 57:20 in how it makes fun of the people in the real world but i want i want the the game portion to be like 57:27 ridiculous in how serious it takes itself it i want it to take itself so seriously that that's 57:33 funny that it's taking itself like it thinks it's so important i want that to be 57:39 the funny part of the game portion so uh it's a 57:46 it's like a world of warcraft style game um so high fantasy setting 57:52 people have their plans in this case the warriors the ones we follow are people from all over the world and 57:58 they're all kinds of people they're kids and old people and shut-ins even 58:03 business dudes and there is uh kind of a massively 58:08 multiplayer uh dungeon um challenge aesthetic where these teams can fight each other in game 58:16 uh what was that old whatever the less offensive version of smear the queer i don't know if you 58:21 remember that oh yeah that wasn't uh a great title of a japanese game but i'm sure that there's 58:27 a new title for what that is i don't know what it is like the fumble on fred or something i don't know yeah 58:34 so the uh the the the games uh server managers have made the warriors the ones 58:40 they they're the ones that everybody else is coming after uh in the process of this uh this 58:45 campaign for this evening so it's tense it's the warriors this clan of nine 58:51 versus the entire game world uh your clan has to be at a certain level 58:56 to be in that position because you have to be powerful enough to make it a fun game for everybody but just through the process of 59:02 attrition they die out throughout the evening you see very melodramatic moments of losing 59:09 characters that are like uh sad and in game the characters like crying and being like you will be avenged and then 59:16 you just cut to the dude in his room just click click click click click uh just like a little little drool like 59:23 off the corner of his mouth eating chips code red mountain dew yeah yeah 59:28 um so for my directors and there's only one reason i chose these 59:34 guys it was because of one episode of their tv show but it's trey parker and matt stone oh wow okay yeah 59:41 they did a world of warcraft episode of south park that might be one of the best episodes of that kind of tv ever made it 59:48 is hilarious it was so spot on in the moment of its time which 59:54 cartoons never do they're always like years behind um yeah i love that episode and it's very 1:00:00 funny i don't know if south park is still funny but at that time it was still very funny so 1:00:05 uh trey parker and matt stoner the directors i'm actually not using 1:00:11 any big name actors in this all the actors are voice actors like you could have big 1:00:19 name actors as the people that don't do anything sure i hadn't really considered it but the the funny part there would be that 1:00:25 they're there but they don't do anything that's not really yeah 1:00:30 but in the game world i'm i'm using actual voice actors because that's something that that people complain about all the time hiring big stars from 1:00:38 the age of aladdin from uh robin williams blowing that up and them not 1:00:43 doing you know robin williams is the exception but them not generally doing as well as an actual voice actor what yeah fair 1:00:51 so uh in game as swan i have troy baker huge antique voice actor and these 1:00:57 people voice acting is a profession where you voice act in tv and in games 1:01:02 some people are known more for their game voice acting some people are known more for their 1:01:08 their animation voice acting but troy baker is uh he's joel from the last of us but 1:01:14 he's kind of a young guy so he's also like a bunch of other stuff as a young guy's got like a lot of range nice um as 1:01:21 ajax i have nolan north nolan north was drake from the uncharted games but also 1:01:27 has a lot of rain so if you ever played the uh the the arkham city or arkham asylum games 1:01:33 he was the penguin he was cockney penguin oh wow okay yeah just a lot of range 1:01:38 uh as mercy we have tara strong tara strong is the 1:01:44 probably the biggest of the lady voice actors um 1:01:49 she's done so many roles i think the one that comes to mind immediately is that she is so uh tara strong is a 1:01:57 famous voice actor she's probably the most famous voice actress she was on powerpuff girls i believe she was raven 1:02:04 on teen titans go any number of things so she's my mercy but yeah just a bunch 1:02:10 of voice actors um providing actual voices as luther we have patrick seats who is like an anime 1:02:18 villain guy his his career is voicing anime villains nice uh and as cyrus i want to get this in 1:02:25 specifically we have kevin michael richardson and kevin michael richardson is like the default black guy on like um uh 1:02:35 lots of stuff anytime you hear a deep voiced black guy in kids animation it's kevin michael richardson he's uh steve's 1:02:42 high school principal on american dad okay that's kevin michael richardson nice 1:02:49 so my concept is is around those two it's around the cgi game world which is most 1:02:56 the movie the people at home just just being video games zombies 1:03:02 the night ends climactic battle celebration most of the warriors have 1:03:08 survived the night there's tears and drinking and much praise is given 1:03:14 and then we just have a montage of people signing out of their computers and just kind of sitting there with 1:03:20 their mountain dew and cheetos and uh and the movie just ends with these 1:03:26 people like looking at this blank computer screen damn so yeah you do like a uh 1:03:32 a sad ending for sure nice but i like that point that's coming 1:03:39 across is that yeah like all this jubilation all this excitement this you know amazing thing that occurred but in 1:03:44 the end of the day that's just a video game it's not giving your life any of that you know besides that very 1:03:50 temporary feeling of success and community and community and community 1:03:56 sure all right so we've got one last little bit to do before we get out of here and 1:04:01 that's our uh trailers i think uh mashing up the warriors will be very much fun to do 1:04:08 on on a mini episode moving forward in the future there's already like three or four ideas that are circling around in my 1:04:15 brain that are oh definitely pretty easy to combine so that'll be a lot of fun 1:04:20 but for our trailers i'm definitely doing the adam mckay one because the francis 1:04:26 lawrence one would require me to sing in a lady songs and that is not my strong not that i 1:04:32 wouldn't i absolutely would there's no fear about me singing lady parts and songs it's that i don't want to 1:04:39 like not have any audience left after this episode so i'm going to adam mckay it 1:04:45 up um are you doing your which one are you doing man um 1:04:51 i don't know i think it might be easier to find music for the purged one so i think i'll do the purge one okay cool 1:04:57 let me get that cued up [Music] 1:05:08 from the director that brought you don't look up the other guys vice 1:05:13 and anchorman comes a story of the fight that it takes to find 1:05:19 togetherness join director adam mckay as he weaves a tapestry of political intrigue and 1:05:26 infighting as one politician that can change everything 1:05:32 falls from grace with a bullet and the warriors are blamed for it 1:05:39 warriors played by seth rogen jonah hill chief aeroshell martin starr tracy siegel christopher vince floss and i'm 1:05:45 not naming all the people in this movie they are played by the robes played by 1:05:52 broken lizard and everyone involved with broken lizard uh they have to make their way to coney 1:05:58 island where their offices are are held before the streaming universe uh finds a way at 1:06:06 an angle to make them look even worse this is over political intrigue and 1:06:13 the comedy elite joined forces in adam mckay's warriors 1:06:19 take my money great i'm gonna slick back my hair for that screening 1:06:25 or a pinstripe shirt with a white collar and yeah the whole nine yard do the whole nine yards the combo that i never 1:06:32 understood at all is though the blue shirt with the white collar and uh and 1:06:38 the cuffs as well are white yeah weird that's a weird look i don't know why that's a thing that people do but 1:06:45 okay um i i guess so yeah universal sign that you know i have 1:06:50 money and probably that i'm old yeah definitely if you rock that look there's no youths out there wearing the 1:06:57 blue shirt with a white collar all right so you are doing you're doing 1:07:03 the purge one right i am doing the purge one i don't if i didn't mention it in the show because i 1:07:08 don't remember if i did my director is james demonico who directed the purge 1:07:14 trilogy and almost nothing else so yeah nice putting that out there excellent 1:07:19 cool well i am ready when you are let's do it cool here we go 1:07:29 america is the body the new founding fathers are the infection 1:07:34 and the cure is the warriors in the fight against the purge the 1:07:40 warriors and other community groups have come together to protect americans from 1:07:46 the purgers and the philosophies of the new founding fathers but in a terrible turn of events 1:07:53 the organizer of the community protection groups has been murdered and it's up to the warriors to defend 1:07:59 their name from the accusation of crime director james demonicos 1:08:07 the purge the warriors as jaden smith has rembrandt because he 1:08:14 can't fight tanner buchanan cameron monahan 1:08:21 harry star fox sty

NSFW Ep. 89 - Mash-Up: Chubby Grandad Matinee Thandi and Hobbit follow the yellow brick road to a land of unspeakable horrors! Subscribe: bit.ly/SMPUpod A new mini-sode format on "off" weeks on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and Thandi pitch a mash-up story with the previous episode's film/show Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 88 - The Wizard of Oz: Bleak Like Kansas Hobbit and Thandi click their heels together and wish for some actually good remakes of The Wizard of Oz Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "The Voyage" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Steve Combs Through" Theme by Steve Combs Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 87 - Ghost: Why Is Everything Damp?! Hobbit and Thandi say ditto a lot. Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and trailer music by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 86 - Mash-Up: Demolition Man plus Idiocracy (equals Democracy) Thandi and Hobbit imagine a future dystopia where the Wilson bros and Sly and Snipes demolish good taste. Subscribe: bit.ly/SMPUpod A new mini-sode format on "off" weeks on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and Thandi pitch a mash-up story with the previous episode's film/show Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 85 - Demolition Man: The Demolition Meister Hobbit and Thandi go to the future to express their happy joy joy feelings about a Demolition Man remake Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and trailer music by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

01:22:07 true Batman,dark knight,Batman remake,dark deco,batman reboot 84 full Geeks Under the Influence Network geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com (Geeks Under the Influence Network)Hobbit and Thandi pitch ideas for Movie/TV reboots, remakes, reimaginings, sequels, sidequels, and adaptations. Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe My Handle is Jonathan Blade Podcast Links: Twitter: https://twitter.com/Johnathanblade Apple: https://apple.co/2DEgoDT Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3gFHxEX Youtube: https://t.co/c70qsTS08p?amp=1 Check out tons of

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 83 - The Full Monty: Five Armie Hammers (The Razor's Edge) Hobbit and Thandi Woodard (My Handle is Jonathan Blade) go whole hog while remaking/reimagining The Full Monty (1997). Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe   My Handle is Jonathan Blade Podcast Links: Twitter: https://twitter.com/Johnathanblade Apple: https://apple.co/2DEgoDT Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3gFHxEX Youtube: https://t.co/c70qsTS08p?amp=1 Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Moment's Reflection", and "Musical Synergy" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 82 - Legend: Mustache Devil Knows What He's About Hobbit and Scotty P (Geekfathers) are gonna steal the Declaration of Independance to find a pitch on the back for a National Treasure Remake! Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Moment's Reflection", and "Assassins" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 83 - That's Entertainment (The Short List) Style: Dystopian Musical Synopsis: Jacob finds himself in the literal spotlight after his brothers death, and has to decide what and who's worth fighting for in an underground society where his only weapons are his songs. Subscribe: bit.ly/SMPUpod A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 82 - Legend: Mustache Devil Knows What He's About Hobbit and Kyle Smash (Geekfathers) balance the light and the dark when pitching remakes/reimaginings of the 1985 fantasy classic "Legend" Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Middle Earth", and "Before Dawn" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 81 - This Flat Earth (The Short List) Style: Mockumentary Synopsis: Werner Herzog and his documentary crew follow four Flat Earthers as they make their way to the South Pole to prove once and for all the earth is flat. Subscribe: bit.ly/SMPUpod The Holli Fund: https://www.thehollifund.org/ A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 80 - Six String Samurai: Fistfull of Anne Heche's Butthole Hobbit and Dungeon Master Jack take a journey through the desert cinema wastelands to crown one remake the king in this episode pitching Six String Samurai! Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Hi-Fi Brutality", and "Road Action" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 79 - Legacy (The Short List) Synopsis: The son of a deceased horror writer must struggle with creating his own legacy while in the impossible shadow of a father who kept some very dark secrets. The Holli Fund: https://www.thehollifund.org/ A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 78 - Waiting For Guffman: Horny For Organ Hobbit and Thandi Woodard (My Handle is Jonathan Blade) are off to Blaine, Missouri for a community theater reboot/remake of the Christopher Guest classic, Waiting for Guffman! My Handle is Jonathan Blade Podcast Links: Twitter: https://twitter.com/Johnathanblade Apple: https://apple.co/2DEgoDT Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3gFHxEX Youtube: https://t.co/c70qsTS08p?amp=1 Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Darker Heart", and "The Voyage" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 77 - Climb (The Short List) Synopsis: A construction project near a newly clear-cut jungle is ground zero for a global catastrophe when human-specific parasitic fungal spores start spreading, and people start climbing... The Holli Fund: https://www.thehollifund.org/ A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 76 - Face/Off: Face Theft In Space! Hobbit and F.U. Hunter (From The Mouths Of Madness, Beautiful Disasters) pitch ideas for a remake/reimagining of Face/Off Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Epic TV Theme", and "Bustin' Loose" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 75 - Next Star Neighbor (The Short List) Synopsis: Dan is an actor in a TV series about a loveable alien hiding out in the home of a quirky family. Little does he know a visitor mistaking the TV show for real life is about to be his new houseguest.  Life imitates art as Dan tries to survive a TV-obsessed alien roommate without dooming the earth to destruction. The Holli Fund: https://www.thehollifund.org/ A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 74 - Empire Records: Bieber's Oil-Stained Corduroys Hobbit and Katie (Nerdcropolis) pitch ideas for a remake/reimagining of Empire Records Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out Katie at these links: https://nerdcropolis.com/ https://www.instagram.com/nerdcropolis/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Darker Heart", and "Ectoplasm" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 73 - Service With A Smile (The Short List) Synopsis: A suburban Karen is sentenced to a month of waiting tables after her tantrum causes damage at a restaurant. Sharing her experiences from the incident on her blog causes some unexpected results. The Holli Fund: https://www.thehollifund.org/ A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Smack My Pitch Up 72 - Heathers: Old People Crime Hobbit and Reese Williams (Spying on Humanity podcast, Shockoe Sessions) pitch ideas for a remake/reimagining of Heathers. Subscribe to Smack My Pitch UP! https://link.chtbl.com/smpu_gui_subscribe Check out Reese at these links: https://www.youtube.com/user/inyourearstudios/videos https://www.reesewilliams.com/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", and "Road Action" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode This work is licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 71 - No Late Fees (The Short List) Synopsis: In 2010 the movie rental store is in it's death throes. The last Blockbuster in town awaits an important phone call that will seal their fate. A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 70 - Starship Troopers: Fascism For Kids! Hobbit and Jack the Dungeon Master pitch ideas for a reboot/remake of Starship Troopers! Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Middle Earth", and "Opus One" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 69 - (Middle-Aged) Heroes In A Half Shell (The Short List) Synopsis: In a world where mutated animal people are common, the four former child actor turtles deal with middle age, being has beens, and  former cast-mate who's dying. A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 68 - Weird Science: Horny Eighties Sex Wizardry Hobbit and Chris Porter strap on their head bras, and deliver electrifying remakes/reimaginings of the 1985 John Hughes classic "Weird Science" Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Ashes of an Empire", and "Road Action" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 67 - Oak Island: The Hole Truth (The Short List) Synopsis: A treasure hunting adventure comedy loosely based around the mysteries of Oak Island, and possibly a backdoor sequel to Step Brothers? A new mini-sode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 66 - A Hallmark Xmas: Hot Widow Ryan Hobbit and Amy Bogarde (Deeply Upsetting) come up with their own takes on the Hallmark Christmas movie formula! Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme and "I Will Leave You Too" by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode  This work is licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 65 - Headstrong (The Short List) Synopsis: A political thriller inspired by the events of 2020, and the racist ramblings of the singer of a band that hasn't been relevant since 2006. A new minisode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 64 - Plan 9 From Outer Space: Oh, Hi Earth! Hobbit and Carlton K. (Spiderbite Studios, Help Wanted) take on the atomic age with this episode all about Ed Wood's cult classic "Plan 9 From Outer Space." Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "Darkest Heart" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode  This work is licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 63 - Short List: The Last Turkey A new minisode format every other week on the Smack My Pitch Up stream! Mike the Hobbit and occasional guests pitch and cast an original idea for film/TV Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 62 - Turkeyfied Films: The Blood Of The Bird Hobbit and Murphy Lawless give thanks by sharing a cornucopia of films adapted to fit perfectly into your Thanksgiving holiday. Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Tempting Fate", and "Love Him" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 61 - Once Bitten: RuPaul's Vamp Race Hobbit is joined from the future by The Bruce himself (GUI Pre-Cap). Together we sink our teeth into ideas for a remake/reimagining of the Jim Carrey cult classic "Once Bitten" Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Tempting Fate", and "Ashes of An Empire" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 60 - Universal Dark Universe: Tom Cruise Is The Darkest Timeline Hobbit is joined by Jack the Dungeon Master for a peek into the Universal Monsters Dark Universe! Listen as we bring together Frankenstein's Monster, The Bride, Dracula, Wolfman, Invisible Man, Mummy, The Phantom, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and The Creature! Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "The Voyage", and "Middle Earth" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 59 - The Craft: Existential Spider Crisis We're calling the corners with this coven of four panelists conjuring up their pitches for a remake/reimagining of the witchy classic "The Craft"! Hobbit is joined by Will and Holly Macabre (Hellkitten RVA), and Amy Bogarde (Deeply Upsetting) for some couple on couple magic! Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Darker Heart", "Atlantis and a tiny part of "Bustin' Loose" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 58 - Needful Things: Social Media Is The Devil Mike the Hobbit and Myke Reiser travel up to Castle Rock to have a devil of a time pitching a remake of Stephen King's "Needful Things" Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Darker Heart" and "HiFi Brutality" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 57 - Silence of the Lambs: DJ Hannibal Lecter We're gonna pitch this remake with some fava beans and a nice Chianti! I'm joined by Katie from nerdcropolis.com blog/podcast to pitch Silence of the Lambs! Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "A Darker Heart" and "Ashes of An Empire" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

An excerpt from "Ep. 56 - Movie Slasher Battle Royale: Summon All Monsters!" Mike The Hobbit transforms into his alter-ego "MC Gamwise Samgee" to bring you a truly monstrous rap battle between Candyman and Freddy Krueger! Ash narrates, and Leatherface delivers an electric drum solo!  "Summon All Monsters" lyrics: http://bit.ly/SummonMonsters LYRICS: Ash (spoken): The Necronomicon Ex Mortus. Roughly translated... The book of the dead. The book serves as a passageway to other dimensions, and Elvira has accidentally called some of the universe’s deadliest monsters with it! Now it’s up to me to stop it... Again. Groovy! Candyman: They say the blood that I have shed was truly innocent, But when I’m called from the beyond fucking answer it! Like Wu, the crew, attacking bees I’m out here killing it Now I gotta deal with Freddy? Nah, that dude he fucks with kids! Yer Nightmare boy is squaring up oh no he must be trippin’ Like sweetest honey are the rhymes that I’ve commenced to dishin’ then you call all these other fucks like they my competition? Say farewell to the flesh Cabrini killa ends you livin! Freddy: The souls of all the little kids they give me all my strength And when It’s showtime I’ve been known to go to any length stalk your dreams, welcome to primetime I don’ want your thanks But cap’n hook you better kiss the glove and fall in rank! So welcome to my nightmare, this is god, and if you please You get more kids with honey not with swarms of killer bees! If Leatherface could talk chainsaw bitch back me up But mutey’s on his drums to show you bitches what is what [LEATHERFACE DRUM SOLO] Freddy (spoken): Oh that was just awful. Ash (spoken): Hey Leatherface tell you what? Stick to wearing skin on your face, not hitting it with sticks! And let me get this straight... there’s a guy named “Candyman” and he’s NOT the pedophile here? I’m sorry, none of this makes sense to me. I’m sorry, Elvira. You’re on your own. I’m gonna go home and sleep off this hangover. "Ectoplasm" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US   geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries  

NSFW Ep. 56 - Movie Slasher Battle Royale: Summon All Monsters! Hobbit goes solo to cast two versions of a slasher mash-up movie starring Freddy, Jason, Candyman, Michael, Ash, and Elvira. This episode also features the soon to be hit single "Summon All Monsters" from Hobbit's alter-ego MC Gamwize Samgee! "Summon All Monsters" lyrics: http://bit.ly/SummonMonsters Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "Ectoplasm" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode  These works are licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 55 - Heat: Michael Mann's Surround Sound Tutorial Hobbit and Herr Grutz (Beautiful Disasters) take on pitches for the greatest bank heist movie of all time! "Heat" (1995) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113277/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World" and "Modern Combat" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode  These works are licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 54 - Friends: America's Sweetheart Kristen Bell Hobbit and Amy Bogarde (Deeply Upsetting)  "Friends" (1994-2004) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0108778/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Atlantis" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US “Steve Combs Through” Theme by Steve Combs This work is licensed under a Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/legalcode  These works are licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 53 - Zack Snyder's 300: My Three Abs Hobbit, Dungeon Master Jack, and Melina pitch some super-manly remakes/reimaginings for the Zack Snyder comic book inspired film "300." Our insights will block out the puns, so we will have to dad joke in the shade! "300" (2006) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0416449/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Tempting Fate" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US "Time Attack Against the Univers" by Komiku  http://bit.ly/2JcJP0K  These works are licensed under Public Domain geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 52 - Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead: Bad Mother Hobbit and Tori Sipe (letstalkpop.net) are right on top of this episode pitching a remake of "Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead", Rose! "Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead" (1991) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101757/ Let's Talk Pop! https://www.letstalkpop.net/ Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Tempting Fate" and "Middle Earth" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 51 - American Psycho: Field of Screams Hobbit and Herr Grutz need to return some videotapes, and pitch ideas for an American Psycho remake/reimagining "American Psycho" (2000) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0144084/   Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Bustin Loose" and "The Voyage" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries

NSFW Ep. 50 - Deep Blue Sea: Look Who's Sharking? Hobbit and The Danimal are sick of these emmer effin sharks in this emmer effin reboot! "Deep Blue Sea" (1999) on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0149261/   Check out tons of merch for the GUI Network on TeePublic: http://bit.ly/teepublicGUI GUI Network Hotline: (804) 505-4GUI (4484) (Message & data rates may apply) _________________________________________________ ● Track Info ● "In A World", "Atlantis" and "The Voyage" by Jason Shaw (audionautix.com) These works are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US geeksundertheinfluence@gmail.com for sponsorship inquiries