Podcast appearances and mentions of Brian Love

“This business is still people-driven.”In this episode of Travillian Next, Travillian's Michael Perito, Head of Bank Strategy, and Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech, sit down with Bob White, 1st Colonial Community Bank CEO, for a no-nonsense look at what's shaping the banking industry today. From the battle for top commercial banking talent to the evolving role of technology, the conversation highlights the challenges and opportunities facing financial institutions.Bob shares what he looks for when hiring, why internal training programs matter, and how mergers can be a smart talent play. Plus, they tackle deposit gathering, operational risk, and the future of branch banking.

MidWestOne Bank is a $6.2 billion in assets community bank with a footprint spanning from Denver to Minnesota to its home base in Iowa. As the bank's technology needs evolved, it became clear that the bank had outgrown its existing talent structure. But when is the right time to bring in a CIO—and how do you find the right leader to drive meaningful change? In this conversation, hosted by Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, MOFG leaders share their journey from recognizing the need for a CIO to executing an executive search that led them to the right fit. Join MidWestOne's Chief Executive Officer, Chip Reeves, and new Chief Information Officer, Paul Ho-Sing-Loy, as they discuss the challenges of hiring at the executive level, why they chose to work with a recruiter, and what set their final candidate apart. Also, hear from the recruiter at Travillian, Patrick Cooney, who found Paul and helped him get excited about an opportunity that would see him relocate from New Jersey to Iowa. For banks facing similar growing pains, this conversation offers key takeaways on knowing when to expand your leadership team—and how to make the right hire when you do.

In this episode of Travillian Next, Travillian's Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech, Keith Daly, Principal, Banking & Fintech Search, and Michael Perito, Head of Bank Strategy, break down what's ahead for banking and fintech in 2025. With their sharp expertise and lively personalities, they make the tough topics—like succession planning, tech-driven leadership, and the demand for top-tier CFOs—sound anything but boring. The trio breaks down why community banks need to balance big-picture vision with real-world execution, while also stressing the need for fresh strategies in risk management. Packed with insights and a few laughs, this episode shows how banks need to stay on their toes and adapt to a world that's changing faster than ever.

Earlier this year, Newsweek named DFCU Financial one of America's Top Credit Unions. In this episode of Travillian Next, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, was lucky enough to sit down with DFCU's President & CEO, Ryan Goldberg, to uncover the story behind the bank's success and what some would consider “his bold career moves.” What drives a leader to leave a memorable career in community banking and take on the unique challenges of the credit union world? They discuss DFCU's strategic growth through M&A, the approach to leadership and mentorship, and how they're shaping the next generation of talent. Ryan also shares his perspective on the very nuanced task of navigating industry transitions. Chapters 00:00 | Introduction to DFCU Financial and Ryan Goldberg 07:38 | Transition from Community Banking to Credit Unions 14:39 | Navigating Criticism in Credit Union Acquisitions 19:41 | Retention and Integration Post-Acquisition 27:39 | The Role of Mentorship in Career Growth

In this episode I interview Brian Love. Brian is a prominent skate in the Leander/Cedar Park, TX. area. He has been teaching lessons for a few years now and is an instructor at The Skate Gym. In this interview we talk about his skateboarding life, his teaching philosophy and his views on the direction of skateboarding as a whole.

Today we sit down with Brian Love and Keith Daly from the Travillian Group. We discuss the keys to succession planning and the importance of attracting and developing young talent at your  GET OUR NEW EBOOK: TOP 12 WINNING STRATEGIES FOR COMMUNITY BANKS IN 2025 The views, information, or opinions expressed during this show are solely those of the participants involved and do not necessarily represent those of SouthState Bank and its employees SouthState Bank, N.A. - Member FDIC

Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, chats with Tom Ogaard, CEO of Native American Bank, about their efforts to boost economic opportunities in Native American communities. Native American Bank partners with other native loan banks and non-bank native CDFIs to bring financial services to reservation-based communities. They focus on projects such as healthcare facilities, housing, and economic development, aiming to create new jobs and improve the economic opportunities for tribes and tribal communities. Learn more about how Native American Bank is driving change through these strategic partnerships and innovative projects. Topics Discussed: Native American Bank's Mission and Access to Capital Projects and Partnerships with Native Loan Banks and CDFIs Addressing Housing, Health Care, and Economic Development Needs Key Issues in Native American Communities Optimism for the Future

In the latest episode of Travillian Next, host Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, sits down with community bankers from North Carolina and Tennessee to discuss the profound impact of Hurricane Helene. The storm has left a trail of devastation, affecting countless families and businesses in its wake. At the time of this release, the death toll has reached over 230 individuals with hundreds more still unaccounted. Financial costs could total over $30 billion and the rebuilding of these communities will take years. Our guests, Lynn Johnson, Chief Operating Officer, EVP at North Carolina Banker's Association, Billy Carroll, President & CEO at SmartBank, and John Hunter, Senior Vice President and Tri-Cities Community President at Trio South Bank, share accounts of the challenges their communities are facing and the vital role local banks are playing in the recovery process. Summed up very well by Billy on the long road ahead for folks affected by Hurricane Helene, he said, “Don't forget about it….Stay plugged into what's going on in all of these communities…Look for opportunities to help.” While relief efforts are underway, there is still much to be done to help rebuild these communities. Your support can make a difference in the lives of those affected by this disaster. By donating to trusted organizations, you can help provide essential resources and long-term aid. Here are four organizations you can support today: North Carolina Bankers Association Mountain Ways Tennessee Bankers Association Region Ahead

Name That Bank! A show for bank geeks, made by bank geeks... Join us for an exclusive premiere of the Travillian-hosted game show—NAME! THAT! BANK! —featuring contestants Mandi Simpson, Partner at Crowe and Chris Mihok, Managing Director at KBW, who both have extensive networks with Southeastern US institutions, which is this week's focus region. How Does It Work? This game draws inspiration from the classic "Name That Tune," but with a twist: instead of tunes, it's all about naming banks! Brian Love, the charismatic host and Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, presents a series of clues to the contestants, pitting them against each other to guess the bank correctly. Expect plenty of laughs, friendly competition, and insightful commentary along the way. It's a short but fun episode that you won't want to miss! Can you guess all five banks?

Join us for the latest episode of Travillian Next, where Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, dives into the hot topic of credit unions acquiring community banks. In this discussion, Brian sits down with Jeffrey Cardone, Partner and Attorney at Luse Gorman, PC, and Michael Bell, Partner at Honigman LLP, to explore the dynamics of these acquisitions. They shed light on the roles played by all parties involved and the hurdles they encounter along the way. But that's not all – they also zoom out to examine the broader landscape of mergers and acquisitions in the banking sector. From succession planning to regulatory challenges, they unpack the complexities driving M&A activity. Don't miss out on this deep dive into the future of banking mergers!

Join Ron Shevlin, Chief Research Officer at Cornerstone Advisors, and Brian Love, Head of Banking and Fintech at Travillian, as they navigate the critical challenge of talent acquisition in the banking industry. Highlighting the demand for fresh skills, especially in technology and innovation, amidst industry evolution, Ron underscores the vital role of strategic alignment and innovation in fostering growth. He also explores the intriguing possibility of Chief Information or Chief Innovation Officers ascending to CEO roles, offering a glimpse into the future of banking leadership.

When Lincoln Savings Bank and its Chairwoman, Sally Hollis, began their CEO search in the summer of 2023, they embarked on a journey to find someone who could blend the past, present, and future of the organization. With assistance from Travillian, Sean Willett was tapped to be the bank's new CEO.  In this candid conversation with Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, Sean and Sally reflect on: - How to preserve culture when adding a new Chief Executive Officer - The bank's Board dynamics, best practices on succession planning and executive search - How an "outsider" can be beneficial to a company's transformation - How to properly integrate and socialize a new executive onto a pre-existing team - Thoughts on Lincoln's continuing Banking-as-a-Service efforts

In the latest Travillian Next episode, Travillian hosts Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech, and Indra Elangovan, Head of Strategic Advisory, sat down with Ted Rosinus, Managing Director at Stephens for a thought-provoking discussion. Ted shares M&A insights from the intersection of investment banking and his banking background. Explore the latest deal trends, outlooks, M&A process, and the strategic utilization of M&A for a competitive edge. Gain valuable perspectives on talent strategies, succession planning, and PE trends through the M&A Lens. 3:56 Top Priorities for Banks in M&A 7:24 Outlook for Banking M&A in 2024 and Beyond 10:55 Incorporating Capital Market Capabilities in M&A 13:30 Impact of M&A on Talent Strategy 22:26 Private Equity Investments 28:45 Current Concerns of Community Bank Boards 30:58 Factors Affecting the Length of the M&A Process 33:45 Favorite Movie

In our latest Travillian Next episode, Charles Potts, EVP and Chief Innovation Officer at ICBA, joined our host, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, , for a lively chat and some entertaining banter about tech's impact on banking efficiency. This was a fun one with tons of "bank geek" banter, talk of flying cars and the hard-hitting facts! Use the guide below to read more about the topics discussed or use the time stamps next to the header to jump to which part interests you most. (02:13) Technology's Role in Banking Efficiency Brian and Charles dove into the tech-driven evolution of banking operations. Charles stressed tech isn't about replacing bank talent but supercharging their skills. It's about changing the hiring game and upgrading operations. Brian shared examples of simple bots being used to automate tasks, freeing up employees to focus on more valuable work. Charles added that technology allows sales process to handle more volume, enabling officers to see more prospects and loans. Bottom line: Max out tech for max efficiency in banking ops. (10:34) Community Banks Embracing Technology Charles and Brian dug into tech's pandemic impact on banks. Charles highlighted a shift from manual labor to the adoption of RPA and machine learning, revolutionizing loan processing efficiency. Brian connected the dots, emphasizing the direct link between streamlined back-office operations and heightened frontline productivity. Their conversation featured success stories from Kimberly Kirk, Chief Operations Officer, Queensborough National Bank and Jay Tuli, President & Director, Leader Bank. (15:10) Innovation and Succession Planning in Banks Brian and Charles discussed the pivotal connection between innovation and succession planning in banks, expressing concerns about potential talent loss like Kim and Jake, fearing a hit to innovative vision. They emphasized the need for a clear leader successor and integrating innovation into the organization's culture beyond a specific department, recognizing the importance of attracting younger, innovation-minded talent. Charles illustrated this with an example of creatively combining existing products and services for improved outcomes. (22:35) Data's Rising Impact on Banking Charles emphasized the increasing importance of data in the banking industry, envisioning a future where hiring priorities will favor those proficient in data analysis and strategic alignment. He noted universities' response to this trend by expanding their data analytics curricula. In response to Brian's query about potential paths to the CEO role, Charles confirmed that positions like Chief Technology Officer or Chief Data Officer could indeed pave the way. Emphasizing the critical role of data in banking success, Charles acknowledged the challenges of data volume, speed, and precision. He advocated for enhanced data analytics tools and a stronger strategic approach to boost operational efficiency. Brian agreed, adding that future industry leaders will likely emerge from diverse backgrounds and skillsets.

Discover insights from industry expert Matt Resch, Founder of RT Partners, in our latest Travillian Next conversation with host Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian.   Answers to key banking questions, including: Talent: What does the Banking Executive of the Future look like? M&A Dynamics: What are the consolidation trends now and in the near future? Balance Sheet Strategies: How can banks think proactively to set themselves up for success?  Earnings Outlook: What are the early takeaways from Q3 bank performance?   Learn about the challenges and opportunities shaping the future of the banking sector. Don't miss this engaging conversation!

Host(s):John Papa @John_PapaWard Bell @WardBellDan Wahlin @DanWahlinCraig Shoemaker @craigshoemakerGuest:Mike Ryan [@mikeryandev]](https://twitter.com/mikeryandev)Recording date: Sep 21, 2023Brought to you byAG GridIdeaBladeResources:PolarisSite Reliability on Web Rush with Brian Love on episode 228Surviving Technical Debt with Mike Ryan on Web Rush episode 117Websites vs Web AppsPolaris on LinkedInFirebase PerformanceSentryData DogGoogle AnalyticsSendBeacon APIUsing Web WorkersA closer look at the Beacon APINew RelicSmokey Mountains WebsiteTimejumps00:27 Welcome00:52 Introducing Mike Ryan03:16 What is site reliability UX?06:28 Sponsor: Ag Grid07:28 Why is reliability so important in a web app?14:02 How can I prepare for site issues?16:13 Where do you learn about tooling?19:43 What do you do if the monitoring software goes down?22:48 Sponsor: IdeaBlade23:53 What about fault tolerance?26:21 What are other uses for SendBeacon?29:14 Why isn't there more conversations around this?30:52 Who should be using user monitoring?32:25 How easy is it to get started with Polaris?34:04 Final thoughtsPodcast editing on this episode done by Chris Enns of Lemon Productions.

Exploring the Resilience of Community Banks Amid Macroeconomic Pressures we had an enlightening discourse with ICBA Panelists. We welcomed ICBA (Independent Community Bankers of America) - Ardent Advocates for Community Banks for a Perspectives-Sharing Session. Brad Bolton, President & CEO of Community Spirit Bank, Sarah Getzlaff, CEO of Security First Bank of North Dakota and Jim Sills, President & CEO of Mechanics and Farmers Bank exchanged their perspectives on the evolving trends in deposit and lending pricing, regulations, GRC (Governance, Risk, and Compliance), cybersecurity, M&A and initiatives related to talent development. Travillian Hosts: Indra Elangovan, Head of Strategic Advisory, Dale Henderson, Principal Banking & Fintech, Patrick Cooney, GRC Search Lead and Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech

With an incredibly diverse past in investment banking, private equity, and bank regulation, InterBank's President and COO, C.K. Lee, is one of the industry's most well-rounded executives. He joined InterBank three years ago, which has a distinct strategy around loan pricing and funding which is so simple yet so atypical in the bank space. In an expansive dialogue, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, asked Lee about his own career trajectory, what it's like to land on Main St. from Wall St., how he manages his talent and succession planning, his thoughts on M&A, and his favorite movie. 01:02 | C.K. Lee's Transition from Wall Street to Main Street 04:31 | About InterBank & It's Process (Adjustable Rate Loans) 08:05 | What Does the Funding Look Like? 11:33 | Talent 16:52 | How Have C.K. Lee & InterBank Stayed Ahead in the Talent & Succession Planning Game? 22:02 | M&A 30:21 | C.K. Lee's Take on M&A & Where Its Headed 33:44 | Favorite Movie!

On July 19, Travillian Next hosted a live webinar where we discussed critical issues facing community banks and credit unions, including fintech partnerships, vendor optimization, risk vs innovation, and building a culture of growth mindset and talent. Travillian's Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech Search, and Keith Daly, Principal – Banking & Fintech Search, spoke with some of the brightest minds and experts in the industry for this dynamic chat. Panelists: Patrick Sells – Co-Founder True Digital Matthew Smith – Chief Digital Banking Officer; Head of Enterprise Product, Marketing, & Transformation at Webster Bank ($75B in Assets) Danielle Doyle – Chief Innovation Officer at Atlantic Union Bank ($20B in Assets) Kari Rappe – Chief Information Officer at Prevail Bank ($1B in Assets) Video Index: 01:43 | Background from Panelists / What are you working on now? 14:47 | Vendors and Vendor Optimization 26:59 | Risk & Compliance 39:20 | Culture of Innovation 52:10 | Talent 1:03:53 | Conclusion

Recent developments in the bank sector have led to confusion and uncertainty about the road ahead. In this wide-ranging and timely discussion with Travillian's Head of Banking and Fintech, Brian Love, our panelists, including Bob Toma from Raymond James, John Reichert from Reinhart, and Joe Fenech from GenOpp Capital Management share their insights on the current state of bank fundamentals, thoughts on the outlook for M&A, the changing investment and regulatory landscape, and the outlook for regional and community bank stocks.

Scott Mills, the President of the highly renowned William Mills Agency, stands at the helm of one of the most prominent public relations and marketing firms specializing in the financial services industry. Recently, Scott engaged in a conversation with Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, shedding light on how reputational risk is alive and well, as evidenced from bank failures earlier this year. As the landscape of the banking sector evolves, it becomes increasingly crucial for banks to proactively address potential crises and prioritize the cultivation of unwavering loyalty among their customers in times when confidence begins to falter.

Are you ready to redefine talent acquisition and unleash the power within your organization? Step into the world of banking, where the pursuit of talent consumes the thoughts of all. It's a constant quest to find exceptional individuals, to hold onto those vital team members, and to nurture the rise of future leaders. In the heart of North Dakota, at Choice Bank, Samantha Berg serves as the Chief Human Resources Officer, tackling these substantial challenges with unwavering confidence and an innovative approach. Join us on this episode of Travillian Next as Berg takes us on a journey through Choice Bank's triumph in the talent war, revealing their secret weapon—an unwavering embrace of "uncomfortability" in their culture and an audacious hiring process that defies the boundaries of their size. In this conversation, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, and Berg delve into the ever-shifting landscape of hiring trends, exploring the coveted skill sets that define the very essence of hot talent.

FFXIV Patch 6.4 Community Feedback | The Comments Section

const podcast = { episode: 228, title: 'Web Apps and Site Reliability Engineering', topics: [ 'reliability', 'web apps', 'user focused' ], guest: 'Brian Love' hosts: [ 'John Papa', 'Ward Bell' ]};Recording date: March, 23, 2023John Papa @John_PapaWard Bell @WardBellDan Wahlin @DanWahlinCraig Shoemaker @craigshoemakerBrian Love @Brian_loveBrought to you byAG GridIdeaBladeResources:Google Books on SREWhat is SREIntroduction to Site Reliability Engineering (SRE)Reliable systems in DevOpsPing testVoting with your feetWhat is an SLAService Level Objectives and IndicatorsSLA vs SLO vs SLISLIs, SLOs, and SLAs, oh my:Interview with Dave Rensen, SRE Engineering Director on the SRE Workbook:The Origins of SREWhat it means to be a SREGet Polaris (SRE tool)Send Beacon APIGitHub Copilot XPrompt EngineeringLearn with Introduction to Prompt EngineeringTimejumps00:29 Welcome01:37 Guest introduction02:55 What is SRE?05:38 What is it like if you don't have an SRE?09:29 Sponsor: Ag Grid10:36 Available vs reliable13:35 Is SRE the same as health monitoring?21:29 Sponsor: IdeaBlade22:30 How do I make sure I don't cause more reliability issues?27:36 Who's providing the infastructure?31:04 Where's the AI in all of this?33:59 Final thoughtsPodcast editing on this episode done by Chris Enns of Lemon Productions.

Alexander Rolfe, a former FDIC Official and current Managing Director at JCSmithAdvisors, recently joined Travillian's Head of Banking & Fintech, Brian Love, and Head of Strategic Advisory, Indra Elangovan, to discuss the failure of Silicon Valley Bank. Drawing on his experience as a bank examiner, Rolfe provides valuable insights into the regulatory environment and the risk landscape of banking, as well as potential impacts on banks from FDIC insurance and deposit flows. He also offers his thoughts on the future talent and skill requirements for the banking industry.

SouthState's John Corbett is among the most respected CEOs in the banking industry today.  In this discussion with Travillian's Head of Banking and Fintech, Brian Love and GenOpp Capital Management's CIO, Joe Fenech, Corbett recounts the story of his career, growing a de novo community bank in central Florida two decades ago to the southeast regional force that SouthState Bank is today.  Along the way, we gain insight into a managerial style that prioritizes innovative and creative thinking, teamwork, the importance of culture, the value of humility, “thinking big” while “acting small”, and how to manage through a crisis and create opportunity, a particularly relevant topic in the current environment.  See below for a video index, outlining the topics discussed by our moderators and featured guest.

Continuing with Travillian Next's video series highlighting the nation's highest-valued publicly traded banks, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, and Joe Fenech, Chief Investment Officer at GenOpp Capital Management, speak to Stock Yards Bank & Trust CEO, Ja Hillebrand and Lake City Bank CEO, David Findlay. Recorded just prior to recent events impacting the banking industry, this insightful discussion touches on the consistent, disciplined approach employed by each bank, enabling them to thrive through the business and economic cycle. As our nation's banks navigate through an increasingly challenging operating environment, this is a timely discussion with two of the sector's very best and most well-respected operators. To watch part one with Community Bank System's Mark Tryniski and ServisFirst Bancshares' Tom Broughton, please click here.   Chapters: 00:16 | Introduction 16:01 | Entrenchment in markets; Metro vs. Non-Metro Markets 32:56 | Culture / Talent 48:22 | Liquidity  52:08 | Asset Quality  1:05:58 | Where is Banking Headed/Competitors You Respect 1:11:01 | Conclusion

From the lens of an astute and forward-thinking balance sheet strategist, the root cause of the crisis goes beyond interest rate risk. This observation comes from none other than Scott Hildenbrand, Chief Balance Sheet Strategist at Piper Sandler, who engaged in an electrifying discussion with Travillian's Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech, and Indra Elangovan, Head of Strategic Advisory. Scott revealed the intricacies of the balance sheet that work for today's world of banking, addressing changes in customer behavior and products. Scott shares his insightful perspectives on large banks versus small banks and the government's mode of operation for uninsured deposits. How has the CFO role changed and adapted to meet the new challenges? As a strategic thinker, he notes the CFO role should look very different from the banking world we grew up in. Scott shares his short-term and long-term perspectives on the M&A environment, the challenges from a regulatory standpoint and his expectations for greater scrutiny on liquidity from examiners. Discover compelling insights that surfaced from this engaging conversation!

With the credible perspective very few possess, Hernan Hernandez sheds light on this past weekend's wild events which shockingly led to Silicon Valley Bank and Signature Bank failing. Joined by Travillian hosts, Brian Love and Indra Elangovan, Hernan tries to piece together what the FDIC may have missed and gives gives a behind-the-scenes view of the fair auction, bidding process and how this event may change banking sector fundamentals like deposit flows and liquidity risks. Also tune in to hear Hernan's hot takes on potential changes to the FDIC's insurance policy. Video Index 0:20 | Intro and What Was Missed 12:09 | Auction Process/Changes to Banking Fundamentals 14:30 | Potential Changes to FDIC's Insurance Policy Hernan Hernandez - Background Snapshot: Hernan started at the FDIC in Los Angeles, CA in 1990 as a Commissioned Bank Examiner – Capital Markets Specialist, primarily monitoring West Coast banks of $100M to $50B in assets. He then joined Comerica Bancorp, as First Vice President and Manager of Finance for the bank's Western Division. There, he managed a 15-person staff in charge of budgeting, strategic planning, forecasting earnings, measuring and analyzing divisional performance, asset/liability hedging strategies, and customer profitability management. Hernan was the key strategic analyst in the Comerica/Imperial merger that recognized $785 million gain on the $1.3 billion transaction (2.4x TBV). He moved to City National Bank, Los Angeles, CA, in 2004 as Senior Vice President and Manager – Financial Planning, Corporate Development, Strategy and Special Projects, directly reporting to the CEO and Board of Directors. Hernan was an important part of the executive strategic team that grew the bank from $12 billion to over $90 billion. He managed the team in charge of strategy and merger and acquisitions (including equity partnerships and direct investments in fintech ventures) and led the Strategic Project Management Group which consists of 23 colleagues managing regulatory, efficiency and productivity projects throughout the organization. Hernan is now an FIG investment banker, primarily covering community and regional banks on the West Coast.

SmartBank's exceptional track record as a premier financial institution for over a decade has positioned it as an exemplary model for community banks seeking to nurture and invest in their own workforce. With a strong focus on talent development and employee retention, SmartBank has implemented a variety of internal mentorship and leadership initiatives to develop and empower emerging leaders. Further, their unique focus on acquisitive and organic growth in the southeast (namely their home state of Tennessee) has proven quite successful. Brian Love, Head of Banking and Fintech at Travillian, joined SmartBank's Billy Carroll, President & Chief Executive Officer and Nate Strall, Director of Strategy & Corporate Development, for an insightful conversation about SmartBank and how they plan to move forward with a clear strategy and a talented team. Key topics discussed: Billy and Nate's Approach to Recruitment, Retention, and Employee Development Impact of M&A on SmartBank's Growth Strategy Current Outlook on the Market and Credit

Nate Mittag and Frank Sorrentino, Managing Directors of FIG at Stephens, joined Brian Love, Head of Banking and Fintech at Travillian, in a conversation about the state of the community banking space in 2023. Economic uncertainties around AOCI, credit and equity have altered some banks' strategies but Nate and Frank share their thinking on opportunities for banks to plant seeds, think introspectively, and stand out among their peers. The discussion also covers timely topics like M&A, capital raising, share repurchases, tech investments and talent.

Two of the most well-respected CEO's in the banking industry – Community Bank System's Mark Tryniski and ServisFirst Bancshares' Tom Broughton – join Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, and Joe Fenech, Managing Principal of SMBT Consulting, LLC, for an insightful discussion on the approach employed by each bank on their path to success and other observable traits of the nation's highest valued public banks. This wide-ranging conversation touched on a number of topics, including the value of core funding, operating in metro vs. non-metro markets, the importance of maintaining discipline, thoughts on M&A, culture, the “sweet spot” for asset size, fintech, and prognostications for the upcoming year. With the banking industry navigating through a challenging operating environment, this is a timely discussion with two of the industry's best operators. 0:00 - 3:47 Introduction of Webinar 3:47 - 9:14 Introduction of CEO's & Companies 9:14 - 16:00 Core Funding Importance/Metro vs. Non-Metro Markets: 16:00 - 19:15 Importance of Discipline 9:15 - 29:00 M&A Strategy 29:00 - 35:45 Culture/Management 35:45 - 39:30 Missteps Along the Way 39:30 - 42:24 SFBS and CBU: More Alike Than Different? 42:24 - 53:48 $10 Bil. Asset Threshold; Optimal Size 53:48 - 1:01:35 Fintech 1:01:35 - 1:07:03 Prognostications for 2023 1:07:03 - 1:07:29 Conclusion

Embedded Banking. Banking-as-a-Service. Embedded Finance. Whatever you want to call it, banks are both excited and skeptical about the recent upsurge in the adoption of this initiative. BaaS can lead to reaching underserved markets, increased deposit growth and fee revenue, and entering new geographies and hyper-specific communities. But it comes with risks and entering this space needs to be done cautiously and carefully. Infinant, a Charlotte, N.C.-based technology company, offers a unique platform that is purpose-built for banks trying to pivot into BaaS. Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, sat down with Sarah Howell, SVP Partner Programs at Infinant, to discuss their platform and other BaaS-related topics including: A Strategy for Pivoting to BaaS Risk & Regulatory Scrutiny Talent Need for Embedded Finance Recent Layoffs in the Industry

Brian Love, Head of Banking and Fintech at Travillian, is joined by Todd Weiden, Principal and Founder of Saltee Co. Weiden has nearly 20 years of experience as a rising star, most recently as Synovus' Director of Strategic and Business Transformation and previously as SunTrust's EVP of Branch Transformation. Todd recently established his consulting firm, Saltee Co, “that exists to BRING TO LIFE ideas + strategies that will permeate + preserve your organization, driving an incredible experience + growth for your team.”

New World: Beyond Brimstone Sands with  @sl3nder mmo 

Ready Check Raideo and the State of the Game - https://www.readycheckraideo.com/

Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, and Jeff Cardone, Partner at Luse Gorman, chat primarily about how community banks should be thinking about their succession planning. Still an extraordinarily hot button issue, Cardone explains how the lack of succession is a key driver of M&A. Topics discussed: How succession planning drives community bank M&A. Key decision makers and achieving buy-in during the process. How banks are attracting diversity and ESG talent at the bank and on the board. Jeff's take on regulatory hot topics.

Tune into our latest video where The Fintech Cowboys, Dave Mayo and Tanner Mayo, are lassoed into a compelling discussion with Travillian's Keith Daly and Brian Love. They discussed: The Bankers Helping Bankers (BHB) BaaS Association, launched by FedFis & Travillian earlier this year. Talent needed at Tech-Forward banks to compete and grow in the current market The Fintech Roundup Conference hosted by FedFis in early November

I took the time to write a letter to a previous version of myself-a version that had a lot of great friends and family and church and was living in his dream city, but still felt lost and unhappy and unsure that he would ever find love. I wanted to take the time to let him know that he has just no clue how good things are about to get.There will still be a lot of heartache and hard times in the following years, but he's gonna make some really good choices and see some really incredible things happen in his world, most, if not all, because he finally made the decision to get healthy.This is that letter.I encourage you to write a letter to a previous version of yourself and give them hope that better times are coming.

John Allison, Chairman and CEO of Home Bancshares, is one of the great value creators in the bank sector over the past 3+ decades. Through the lens of his experience, Mr. Allison speaks to the issues confronting the banking sector today and discusses with our moderators the key attributes that have driven the success of Home Bancshares, one of the nation's top-performing and highest valued publicly traded banks. See below for an index, outlining the topics discussed by our moderators, Brian Love, Head of Banking & Fintech at Travillian, and Joe Fenech, Chief Investment Officer at GenOpp Capital Management, and our guest, Mr. John Allison. Index Start to 3:15: Introduction 3:15 – 9:00: The Makings of a Successful M&A Transaction 9:00 – 13:17: Growing Geographic Markets Through M&A 13:17 – 16:33: The Merits of Private vs. Public M&A Transactions 16:33 – 20:04: The Makings of a Successful M&A Transaction 20:04 – 25:00: Is The Current Macro Backdrop An Opportunity Or A Time To Be Cautious? 25:00 – 28:55: The Changing Banking Landscape 28:55 – 33:04: The Importance of Culture 33:04 – 35:36: M&A Transactions In Challenging Market Environments 35:36 – 40:17: Are Credit Fears For Banks Overblown? 40:17 – 43:17: What Are The Opportunities From Here? 43:17 – 47:16: Building In A Strong Market 47:16 – End: Who Do You Admire?

Gina made a terrible lasagne. Boz debunks the myth of chicken. Carl Buddig beef bags, Doritos, smoked soup, Colombian food, HOKAs, FULL TRANSCRIPT (unedited):2 (10s):And I'm Gina Kalichi.1 (11s):We went to theater school together. We survived it, but we didn't quite understand.2 (15s):And at 20 years later, we're digging deep talking to our guests about their experiences and trying to make sense of it all.1 (21s):We survived theater school and you will too. Are we famous yet?2 (34s):Hello? Hello. Hello survivors. It is. I Gina reporting to you live. I mean, it's live to me, but it's not live to you because you most definitely aren't hearing it in the exact moment. I'm saying it, but you get the idea. It's Monday night, I'm here at my house sitting in my room where I always record when I talked to boss and I'm I'm, I'm coming on here to tell you that. Hmm. Do you know that expression inside baseball?2 (1m 15s):I don't understand when people say, oh, that's too inside baseball. Because for me, all I care about is the inside of something. I don't even like baseball. I'd love to be inside baseball. You want to show me where they get the dirt off their cleats. Great. You want to show me what kind of savvy they have to use on their cracked hands from rubbing? Oh, that says this is going to sound sexual. I don't mean it that way, but from holding the bat. Yeah. I want to see that you want to, you want to tell me about contract negotiations? I mean, I want to hear that stuff. I want to hear that stuff more than I want to hear about, or, you know, like actually watch baseball anyway.2 (1m 59s):I'm, I'm bringing this phrase up because I've never understood why people, don't, what people think it's bad to be inside baseball. And also by way of telling you that today's episode is going to be a little inside baseball. We record every week. We interview people every week. And at the very beginning, we had so many interviews stacked up that it was months between when we would record somebody and when it actually aired. But once all of that stack got aired, now we pretty much go week to week and that's fine, unless, and until we have a cancellation or two, as the case is for us right now, we had two back-to-back cancellations.2 (2m 52s):So one time when we had this, I put, I repaired an old episode, which I thought was really a great episode. And I'm really glad I repaired it. And then a couple of times we've aired episodes with just BAAs and I talking with no interview. And the reason I like to put something up is because personally, when I listened to podcasts and people take a week off, I really hate that. I really hate when a podcast I'm really used to listening to, you know, coming out on a certain day and like, that's the day I'm gonna, Ooh, it's Tuesday. I get to whatever, walk my dog and listen to my favorite podcast.2 (3m 33s):I hate it when those people take a vacation, but that's what I did. I took a vacation last week and boss was going to record one solo, but her interview canceled. And then the person that we're supposed to speak to tomorrow canceled. So honestly, we're probably gonna have the same problem next week, unless something magical happens. And we're able to interview somebody else before this weekends and who I'm saying all this to say, we do have an episode today. It is not previously aired material. It is boss and I talking, but it is not an interview.2 (4m 14s):And if that's not your jam that I get it, you can, you can just skip this one. Maybe this is not, maybe this is not the one for you, but if you're like me and you are inside baseball and you like things that are inside baseball. And by the way, I mean, it's not like it's inside baseball in the sense that we're talking about, you know, like the platform that we're hosting our podcasts, it's not actually really inside baseball. It's just not, it's just not our typical episode. Anyway, I also want to take this opportunity to think we have actually kind of a surprising number of listeners in other countries.2 (4m 54s):And I have never done something that I've always wanted to do, which is acknowledge all of these wonderful listeners. And so I'm going to do that right now. First we have New Zealand and I happen to know the person who listens to us from New Zealand or at least one of the people. And he Sean Spratt. And he went to theater school with us. And one day we'll have him on the podcast, but thank you, Sean Spratt for your listenership. Very much appreciated. We have listeners in Spain, the United Kingdom, Saudi Arabia, Germany, Singapore, Russia. Although not for the last couple of months.2 (5m 34s):If you know what I mean. France, Jordan, Nepal, Canada, Australia, Brazil, Israel, Virgin islands, pork bowl, Rico, Mexico, Austria, Sweden, Palestine, the Netherlands, Morocco, South Korea, Japan, Finland. I heard Finland has great coffee. I'd like to go there someday. Bangladesh, Uganda, Slovakia, Poland, Ireland, Indonesia, and BA. Right? Thank you to all of you, whoever you are out there listening to our little podcast. I appreciate you.2 (6m 15s):I do. I appreciate you deeply. I am also going to take this opportunity to recognize some fabulous comments that people have left on apple podcasts in the form of reviews. Something. I also greatly appreciate Larkin and Ellis says what a fun show to listen to and to have communion with other theater folks. So many of us survived, thrived or crashed. That's true. Afterschool and hearing tales of everyone's experience brings such humanity to the process. Jen and Gina are delightful and treat each, each guest with such grace, highly recommend. Thank you, Larkin Ellis.2 (6m 57s):Next. We have Zoe incredibly warm, funny and fascinating. These hosts get the best out of their guests. If you are involved in any part of the acting business, this will be a fascinating podcast for you. If you went to any theater school, this could be an opportunity for immense healing and processing things you didn't even know needed more attention. I laughed so hard. I cried. It was bad. It was better than cats. Thank you, Sophie. All right, BJP. Oh, that's I know who this is. This is Brian Brian Polak, who has also a great podcast. I mean, he had an episode on ours, but he's the host of the subtext podcast, which is all about playwrights.2 (7m 38s):And very interesting. If you haven't listened to it, please do his latest urban. I don't know if it's his actual latest, but one of his most recent ones features Tracy Letts. So that's cool. Anyway, Brian says not only are the interviews always free range and fascinating, but the conversations between Jen and Gina that begin each episode are warm and fun. It's like catching up with old friends every new time. Every time a new episode comes out. Thank you. Brian Love that. Scott says this podcast is such a gift, exclamation point. Anyone who has dabbled in the fine arts can relate to the conversations that the hosts and guests are discussing. I would also go as far as to say, listening to this podcast is like having a free therapist, especially if you are embarking on a career in the performing arts.2 (8m 25s):Thank you, Scott. Lovely Scott. Oh, and then here's one I wrote for myself. Yes I did. This is an inside baseball moment. I wrote my own review because I feel at times very desperate to get reviews. So I wrote one for myself. Love the way it is to interrogate the psychological makeup of actors and others who pursue an education at a conservatory. Thank you, Gina. Thank you for your comments, Gina. What a sweet girl. You are. Jimmy McDermott says these ladies dig deep. Thanks Jimmy. Somebody who calls themselves four lifetimes ago, love that love listening to this podcast.2 (9m 8s):As it leads me down memory lane, I'm also able to reflect on my own time, spent at theater school and what it meant to me and how it shaped me into who I am today. Gina and Jen are fantastic hosts, very welcoming with thoughtful questions. Thank you for lifetimes ago that we've got eat Beth James, this pod delightfully dives into fascinating memories and lessons from dream chasers in their youth. A must listen for everyone who has even entertained a life in theater, yay to Jen and Jayna for bringing this quirky subject to life in such a real and interesting way. Thank you. E Beth James, who was nice. Happy in Galveston.2 (9m 48s):Just finished listening to y'all's interview of my son's Seiler. Oh yeah. Okay. So this is sailor's mama y'all did an amazing, oh, I'm going to read it like I'm from Texas. Just finished listening to y'all's interview with my son, Tyler Siler, not Tyler. Tyler is a very Texas named Seiler. Of course y'all did an amazing job. I've known him for 47 years and I learned so much about him. I never thought for a minute that he'd be bullied at theater school, not my Sattler, but it was a real relief to know it didn't happen. Something he didn't mention is that he was a year ahead in school and contracted a ripper in case mano right before leaving for college. So he started college in Chicago as a 17 year old with the case of mano and Dave.2 (10m 32s):Great. It was really fun. Hearing him recount the shows he was in that bear costume was the worst. I'll look forward to hearing interviews with Kevin and PJ. Great. And we did interviews with Kevin and PJ. So I hope you liked those Mrs. Siler. Thomas' mom. All right. You got the idea. I love these nice reviews. Thanks to everybody who gave one who wrote one. And if you are not among those who have read, reviewed us rated or reviewed us, what are you waiting for? Literally? What are you right this second? What are you waiting for? A pause.2 (11m 12s):This rambling that I'm doing and go leave us a review. Okay. Thanks. Appreciate it. All right. I think I've, I think I've yammered long enough. Please enjoy this conversation. Or actually to be honest, it's like three different conversations that it edit it together. Please enjoy this chit chat sesh with me and buzz love you. I'm sorry to hear about your lasagna. I made the word, it was disgusting.2 (11m 53s):I a leftover rotisserie chicken and I Googled like, what can I do with my leftover rotisserie chicken? And I saw this thing make a lasagna with mush. It happened to be all the ingredients that I had and needed to use mushrooms, spinach and rotisserie chicken. Now I will say, I thought to myself that doesn't sound like a good lasagna, like rotisserie chicken. Yeah. I don't know mushrooms are okay. It's finishes. Okay. But the rotisserie chicken and then it was a white sauce and girl, it was, I mean, simply inevitable. And I'm the person in the family who, because I make the food, even if it's not good, I eat it because I spent a lot of time making that, you know, I had this one had to make its way to the, to the trash and media Mente.2 (12m 38s):Nobody, even nobody else. Even my son is lactose intolerant. So he really can't use something like that. Anyway, I had made him a special version. He can eat cheddar, I guess, letters like certain cheeses that are made to him. A version of it, the head cheddar cheese, he actually said it was really good. Maybe it was better than, you know, because it had more like Tang to it. But that's the thing you need to have some acidity. This had zero acidity. It was just right. That's very interesting. I was thinking about that on my walk over here. Cause I saw your posts and I was like, yeah, I think that white sauce is really hard to pull off. Like yeah, unless maybe you have to have like tons of butter and then, but then the rotisserie chicken, which reminds me of a story.2 (13m 24s):So my, my mom, okay. After Thanksgiving, right at we'd have this Turkey carcass. Right. And then she'd make the Turkey soup. Okay. But one year my uncle, aunt and uncle came from San Francisco, you know, they're from San Francisco. So they wanted to smoke and brine the Turkey. Okay. Let me tell you something. If you've ever had a smoked Turkey soup, it's the most disgusting Turkey, Turkey noodle soup. I mean, I ate it and I was like, mom, what, what, what, what what's happening? And she was like, well, I just, I said, wait, this is the smoked Turkey. You can't have smoked soup.2 (14m 6s):It's like the word wait, was your mama? No, no, but she, okay. So my mom was not ever like literally we, I grew up on McDonald's and I don't know if I've told the budding beef story here. Okay. So kind of one thing. So our lunch has kids. Oh my God. It's no wonder that I have food issues. Like our lunches kids and I don't look, she was doing the best she could. I don't, I I'm. I'm just sick. It's a travesty. What went on. So we had in a lunch bag, a whole bag of fake Karl budding beef bags, which are, which are just fake beef. I don't know if you've ever seen it in the store.2 (14m 46s):Go in the cold cut section. I don't even know if it's legal to sell this shit anymore. But they had Carl budding beef, which wasn't real beef. Yeah. Oh, it was like a vegan thing or no, no, no. It's like spam, like processed beef. So like processed. Yeah. Like processed beef and beef beef. Did she say beef bag? Yeah. Okay. So it's in a bag in a bag and, and there's like 20, probably 24 slices in a bag. My mom would put the whole bag in our lunch. So we'd have 20 and it was salty. No wonder. I mean like it's all, she would just throw the whole bag in.2 (15m 29s):It was probably $2 or bag at that time. So she would throw the whole bag of beef in and then yeah. Well she wasn't, I mean, my mom was literally like, let me just work and fuck these people. And then, okay. So that was that a bad and it wasn't like back then they didn't have the small snack size bags. So it was like a snack ish size bag of Doritos, which we would wrap each Dorito and a piece of beef. Oh God. Okay. So Doritos. Okay. It was Doritos, a beef fat. I'd be like, mom, there's no food. And she'd be like, grab yourself a beef bag for lunch. Be fat. Just a bag of obese.2 (16m 9s):Yeah. And it was so that it was so salty. I remember it. Okay. So, so I'd have the Doritos and the beef bag and it have been so thirsty after lunch. Well, no wonder I have like I high blood pressure. I'm like, this is, this is the impetus for the whole thing. Then it would be a Capri sun to wash it down and then dessert for dessert. It was literally okay. My mom thought she was doing this great thing by getting hostess, went through a phase of doing hostess light. I don't know if you remember, they had light and they had light cupcakes. So it was like a plastic version of their real co she would throw one of those in there. That was my lunch for probably 10 years.2 (16m 51s):Well, every day, like, yeah. Do you ever, could you ever by hotline? Yeah. So Friday, sometimes the hot lunch was literally the square pizza and tater tots. Right, right. Certainly were not, there was no chance of you getting nutrition. I had no vegetables or fruit ever, like ever. And then when she would cook and my dad, you know, he didn't do shit. So, but when she would cook, it would be like weird shit. Like she would make vats of like beef goulash. She's Colombian. What is she making beef goulash for? It was why didn't she make Colombian food? Not, it's not my favorite thing. It's a lot of, some of it's good, but she, she wanted to just assimilate and fuck her past understandably, but also it's a lot of starches.2 (17m 41s):It takes a lot of time. It's a lot of like flowery doughy, everything. So it wouldn't have been that much more nutrition, but it might have tasted better. Yeah, dude, it was, and the goulash would be frozen. Oh my God. She would freeze the goulash. And it was egg noodles. And this meat that had the strange sauce, like tangy, speaking of tangy, but not tangy in the greatest way. And then we'd have to, and I'd be like dad, where, and she was always out of town. I'd be like, dad, I'm not eating this. So we'd order pizza. That was the first. Okay, well this is, this is really sounding so familiar to me. So when I was growing up, my, my mother who worked more than full time, came home every single night and made dinner.2 (18m 24s):And you know, she had her repertoire, but I mean, she, she made dinner from, there was nothing she didn't even use. Like, and they didn't really have too much of it then, you know, nothing was really pre-made. She, she, she made dinner and of course I always hated it because it was something like, you know, she cooked fish or she, you know, she had these weird she's from New Mexico. So she has these looks, she puts all of us in her spaghetti sauce. It's just like some weird things like that. So there's lots of things that she made that I didn't like, but I so relate to it now. And I relate to your mother freezing the goulash because it's just like every night I have to cook dinner every night.2 (19m 6s):And of course I have this panel of critics. That's just like everything I make disgusting. If it's, if it's nutritious in any way, if it's not nutritious, then, then they're really happy with it. Oh my God. That sounds horrible. It's horrible. So I've had this very like passive aggressive relationship and resentful relationship with cooking for my family. We end up ordering out, like I would say, well, definitely two nights a week, but some weeks three. And it's, I hate it. I just, I hate absolutely everything about it. And I also relate to being on the receiving end of food that, you know, it's just like, it's a no win situation.2 (19m 47s):It really is. I mean, I think the only thing to do is like, when kids are like two and three, get them to start cooking and be like, fuck it. You're on your own because you know, so my son can really cook. He can really cook, but he's low on the motivation. He's like, that's, you know, that's kinda your job and he's not, he's not wrong. I mean, you know, as much as I, he's not wrong, it is sort of my job. But anyway, yeah. It's, it's, it's, it's not good, but okay. How do we get because of my lasagna? Oh, the lasagna. So yeah, I, I saw, I heard that and I, I, I read that this morning and I was like, Ooh, but the good news is that the chicken? I mean the chicken, well, I guess the chicken would have ended up in the garbage anyway, but did, did the dog eat any of it?2 (20m 31s):No. You don't give that to them. I gave, well, I gave no, I gave the dog like the skin of the chicken that I wasn't using on the middle of Sunday. But I forgot to mention, I made it on Sunday, which is the day that you so graciously ordered my family pizza, which is why we didn't meet lasagna on Sunday. We ate it last night, but then we, it was gross. But on Sunday, I guess everybody have to tell everybody where we texting or talking on the phone phone about a funny audition situation. Yeah. And I was telling you, like Aaron had a stomach bug. My daughter had her broken arm. My son, oldest child always has some pains.2 (21m 14s):Oh yeah. Yeah. He's like, I woke up, I walked out the door. The first thing I see is just blood all over the bathroom. Mostly has been going on for 30 minutes. It looked like a crime scene in there. I mean, it was just one thing after the other. So you sent me pizza. Yeah. I don't even feel that. And you sent these something we'd never had before. It's wings, boneless wings, but oh my God, those were a huge hit. So yeah, because you know what my thing is because I'm so greedy, Gina is that you don't want the bone getting in the way of the food. So just eat the goddamn, like who needs the bone?2 (21m 54s):Like, fuck the bone. Like you want the food? I don't go in for like ribs. I don't go in for anything with a bone. I'm like, I mean, rotisserie chicken. Okay. But I just take the honk of breastfeed off. I don't need a bone getting in my way is what I'm telling you. Okay. But a bone, like, honestly, you might want to reconsider that because food meats cooked with Bonin are usually more flavorful and tender. True. That true debt to debt. So like, I think you're right. Like, but I also am known to love a dry as fuck piece of chicken. I don't yeah. The chicken breasts without anything on it. Yeah. I, there is some weird thing about me that I, and also, you know, which is sad that I love chicken so much because my doctor told me there's no nutritional value in chicken.2 (22m 42s):Like, like literally, yeah. The protein, it's like a very small amount of protein in chicken. It's like garbage, garbage it's air. Like basically. So we're killing these chickens and we're thinking we're eating, being healthy. And really she's like, just eat fish like that. You, you just, chicken is not. And I was so sad when, cause she said eat before eight. If you're not going to eat beef, do fish. But like you don't count on a chicken for your protein is what Joe, Kayla, the chicken damn that's up ending my entire, we ate chicken all the time. I'm always like, that's the healthier thing to give my kids. No, I know. And like, I, it was like, I wish it was different, but chicken is like a non issue.2 (23m 23s):Like a it's like not really a thing. No. And I was like, well, you know what? Like chick Chick-fil-A is going to be up in arms about this big that's right. And what about eggs? Can we have that's all protein. All. Okay. But she was like, literally I think she said, and I wish we had so many listeners that they would like write in and tell me I was wrong. So if you are listening and tell me that I'm wrong. But like, I think she said that like, there's more protein in like four florets of broccoli than a chicken breast. Oh, that isn't the same. This is reminding me of it's reminding me of when I found out that the reason that we all thought breakfast was the most important meals because the cereal companies put off that how much of our life is just a complete lie foisted.2 (24m 18s):Well, I advertising you asked Adam McKay all of it, all of it. All right. We are so influenced by every single thing. Yeah. So anyway that, yeah, I know. I know that. I know that's really true for me. I know 1000% that I will buy something with prettier packaging. Even if it's not as good quality as the other, that's it, it all goes back also to my, my Charleston chew a story. I never told you this. So what? I was little, another something fell. Oh, okay. When I was little, my mom said you can get any candy bar at the store. Right.2 (24m 58s):And my greedy ass was like, I'm going to get the biggest candy bar. The biggest one. I I'm going to get the biggest one because I was greedy. Right. And also food was loved to me. Right. So, I mean, that's the truth. So I was like, I'm going. So we went to the store and I remember looking Snickers that I'm like, look at that motherfucking Charleston shoe. It's like 10 feet long. But I didn't know. I never had a Charleston shoe. So my sister got probably something reasonable received, something like that. I got this huge Charleston shoe thinking. I fucking beat the system. I con this bitch out of a huge, it tasted like it was like a strawberry vanilla coaster.2 (25m 39s):Right. Just ripped out my retainer. Like that's all I was like, that was my first lesson in greed that in, you know, like the, so there's other stories. But like that, that, that story was like, oh my God, you can't trust. So we've learned this morning, Gina, you can't trust a chicken for your protein and you can't fucking trust a Charleston shoe or a white sauce or a white sauce. That was the first lesson this morning. That was the first lesson. Yeah. Anyway, how is miles? His birthday know? It was really good. It was okay. So there's this place in, in Pasadena that I, my friend works at and she's the funniest.2 (26m 20s):I mean, she's like, we're friendly. We're not like good buddies, but she, she works at this place called noodle street. Okay. And you, and it's not noodles. And co which miles told everyone, I was taking him to noodles and fucking co for his birthday. I was like, is that a fast? It's like pancakes. I'm like miles. You can't tell people that I'm not that ridiculous. Not that there's any, well, there is wrong with that. Like, I can't take you there for your birthday. Like that for a celebration ticket, injured husband to Panera. I mean, some people probably do it look, but whatever it's like on the Pinera level, but noodle street is a handmade noodle company in Pasadena. And my friend Christina works there.2 (27m 0s):Who's hilarious. And I wanted to take him there. So we went to noodle street and it was one of those things where we're like, Christina, just give us a bunch of food. Right. She literally, there were like 10 dishes. I was like, it was so much food that miles miles does the same. And I love him. And, and look, I obviously have food issues, but he will eat until he throws up sometimes like that, that, or almost like, I've never, I haven't done that. And since I was a child, I don't think. But like he, he can't and it's not like we just so good. He can't stop himself. There's a problem area.2 (27m 40s):And so this happened at Ethiopian once where he literally threw up and had to do something in his mouth, you know what I mean? Like he can't stop himself. So he just went crazy and it's really like, they used, you know, she uses it's it's Asian fusion and there's all different, cool spices. Oh my God. So I didn't want to be the jerk. That's like, like censoring my husband, but, or like trying to food shaman, but I'm like, miles, you gotta slow down. Like this is not going to go. Well, like when he busted into the ramen, the beef, the pork res braised ramen after like six other dishes, I was like, oh dude. And so then he was, he was, he had a problem.2 (28m 21s):He didn't actually have the problem, but we were, so we, we had to close and we were going to go get ice cream and he's like, I can't do it. Luckily we walked. Right. So we could move a little bit. I was fine, but we don't do really. We don't do presence. So like, not that we don't either. Yeah. Because everything you buy is sort of like, I mean, you know, you, you have the money for what you need and then if you have extra money, it's usually for things that are going to be urgent, like you have to fix something in your car, right. Oh, for me, it's like any extra money goes towards my Hoka recovery sandals and my Hoka. Okay. What's a mile sent me a video of you doing a Hoka dance.2 (29m 2s):What is a Hoka? Okay. So whole, because our shoes that I believe hookah Ona, Ona, which is one, one, but it's, I believe Hawaiian, Japanese influent look, I'm ignorant. I don't know. But it is not pronounced one, one. That's all I know it's own. I own a, and so Hoka on it own, it is the name of a company they make for me, with my plantar fasciitis in my right foot and just getting old Sebas shoes. Like I'm wearing my hookup. I'm wearing them right now. You can't see, but like, they are there. Some of them are, but ugly like platform. Like, like they look like a platform sneakers sometimes, but like, like the janky brand, but they aren't, they are there's walking shoes and trail shoes.2 (29m 52s):And I tried to run a them and it's a little clunky, but their soul light and they're really expensive, but they also make a recovery slide. Okay. So this is a very Californian situation, but in your, my floors are so hard and because it's fake wood right. In our apartment and I have bad feet. So I, you know, feet problems right now. So my doctor was like, you cannot walk barefoot. And it's so warm in California. Barefoot is the worst you can't work or people shouldn't walk. You should not walk barefoot on hard surfaces. No, no, no. I know it's not a good deal. So even so in California, it's so warm.2 (30m 34s):You're like, I'll just put on my flip flops. Terrible idea. Flip-flops should be abolished unless they are orthotic flip-flops this is partially how I got into my problem. So I have higher arches, but even if you have regular arches, my friends, you need support on your feet, especially as you get older. So I didn't know this. It's not even like flip flops or the new high heels, like what we shouldn't be doing, you know? Oh my God, that's insane. And my acupuncture has been saying this Liz I'm so sorry. I'd never listened to you. She said this for years, I saw her 10 years ago. And she was saying this, so recovery slides are Hoka makes a recovery slide, which is basically like a slide, like an Adidas or van slide.2 (31m 16s):But they're like super orthopedic. They're not pretty, I mean, minor kind of pretty cause they're blue. But like, they look like, yeah, regular slides, but they're super tall. And this made out of this really light, plastic and rubber, and they are so comfortable for when you come home, you take off your shoes and you don't go barefoot, you go in your recovery. So it's like, how shoes, how shoes? But like for like people would stuff. Yeah. They're really expensive. Like hookahs are like $175, $200 shoes. And the recovery slides are one 50. It's not cheap. Like I had to save up, we used our fucking credit card points for my Hoka collection.2 (31m 57s):Like that's what I'm saying. Like that, that's what it's for. Right. So anyway, so my jam and like, you know, people, you know, like I feel like Eddie Vetter is a big Hoka fan. It's like a hippie kind of thing. Okay. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, you know, I'm sure any better has a good need for support. Just like the rest of us so old, like we are. But also I was gonna say like, I actually didn't know, my husband sent you that video. That's hilarious. What? Oh, so cute. He's only ever texted me twice, but both times he started with this is miles, which is adorable. And I want him to be like, I know I have your number saved into my phone, 55.2 (32m 39s):So anyway. Yeah. I think he, I think he, you know, I think he thinks that you're the greatest thing ever, which I love because you are, and I'm glad that you have somebody who thinks you're the greatest thing. Oh, it's much better than what I used to have. Yeah. I know much better. The diametric opposite. Opposite. Yeah. No, if people like, no, I was telling someone's people in LA that are like younger than us, but approaching 40 are always like dating in LA is the worst. And I'm like, it is, it's really bad here. It's really, really bad. And I would tell them stories about when I was here in oh six and it was the worst or oh five.2 (33m 22s):And it was the worst. Is it really bad? Just because of the problem of like everybody's posturing. Cause it's like that in New York, I think to people, you know, people are at that phase of life where they're really just trying to make something of themselves. And it's a lot about like getting to the next, whatever. Yeah. I think it's what you talk about, which is just straight up sexism where like the men who are okay. So no one, my friend is like 38. I think she said my co-working friend. And she was just saying that like the men, her age, won't date, 38 year olds, they will only date 28 year olds. So she has to date 68 year olds or 58 year olds.2 (34m 5s):Okay. All right. That's the problem. It's so boring. I'm like, you know what? Fuck, this it's diagnostic too. Like when you, when you read about people, you know, the Leonardo DiCaprio's of the world who only ever it's like, okay, but so that's, that's either because you are psychologically, emotionally, whatever yourself, still 20. So you need, or it's because you are so narcissistic that you need somebody who's docile and who you can basically tell what, you know, whatever your garbage is too. And they'll believe you because they're so young. I always knew that about Leonardo DiCaprio, but I just recently read about somebody else who it's like, it's like everybody it's like Larry, David, it's not, it's not even like, like sexy young youngish dudes or middle-aged dudes.2 (34m 53s):It's like everyone. And, and, and it's just so other dudes will say, oh my God, look at that dude. He got that young chick women don't give a fuck. I said, the other thing is it's. It's interesting. Cause when I worked for Nick cage, he married someone 20 years younger. She was awesome. I loved her. I love that. He's still married. No, I loved Alice. I loved her and it wasn't her fault, but it was a really apparently a match that, you know, didn't last. But what I realized in getting to know Alice was that it's like, right. I it's not, it's not her fault.2 (35m 33s):Like she, she's just trying to live her life. And she's also 2020. I was basically five years old. So like let's not get right. So anyway, I also know, like I try not to shame the women in those situations because I'm also like, yeah, but, but it's just a bad situation. I'm just like the And minus your shirt, you did some change.2 (36m 15s):I did a costume change. I was listening to God. I love Leslie Odom Jr. In Hamilton so much. Oh, have we never talked about that? I have never seen Hamilton or heard the music. Me neither until like six months ago when Gisa gave me a ticket to Hamilton in LA and it was not obviously Leslie, it was not that cast, but I thought I would hate it. Like I literally was like, I cannot do this. Like I, and then despite my best efforts to hate it for some reason, and to just want to be a hater, I fell in love with that musical, like fell in love.2 (36m 57s):And I was like, I'm in I'm all in. I don't, I cannot explain. I think it was also because I was in a place where I was like, holy shit, people make stuff like this, it's it. He takes the acting, the singing, the dancing. I was like, this is like, why we have, you know, this is the best of humanity, the very, very, very, very best. And then I got obsessed with the original soundtrack because it's, it's just, they're they're just brilliant. And the guy who plays Aaron Burr is Leslie Odom Jr. Who I didn't know from shit. Right. Obsessed. Like the guy, Aaron Burr is my favorite character in the whole show. He's the guy who kills Hamilton.2 (37m 38s):Right. So yeah. Well Lin Manuel Miranda did. I'm not sure if it was all of the music, but certainly some of the music for, in condo. Have you seen in content? Yeah. So I have such a weird relationship with that movie. I was curious about that, considering that it's about Columbia. Well, the thing is like, and I think people think I'm crazy for saying this, but like they never say it's Columbia. Like they never, they like, they, they have some of the soups they use in the colors they use for the, the, the Colombian flag colors. And like, but they never are specific. And it's also written by so Lin, Manuel is not Colombian. And also Shariece Castro Smith who wrote and developed it is Cuban.2 (38m 20s):What do we do? I have to take issue with, they do say that it's Columbia, but it said in the lyrics, I said, oh, okay. I mean, but it's certainly not referenced like how many times Mexico is referenced cocoa. And I did have that thought like, well, Lin, Manuel Miranda is not collided, but the, but the music is really good. Music is brilliant. And I also think it's a huge step in the right direction. I just, I like wanted to love it more is one of those things. And that's a thing. And also I actually loved west side story. I didn't see it yet. See it, and let's have a talk about it.2 (39m 1s):I loved it. And people think also I'm insane for that. I was like the acting in west side fucking story is like, it's like a masterclass in this shit. Everyone, every single character I've heard that. I, I really haven't heard too many people not liking it. You know, people have find the musical very problematic and mama mama. And of course, of course everything is problematic. Like everything. Okay. Everything is so problematic. I know I just, yesterday saw the news that Pamela Anderson is going to be Roxie Hart and I you're making the same face that I made.2 (39m 42s):And then I saw today on Twitter people saying like, Hey, you know, this is a person who was recently publicly humiliate re humiliated after what re what she originally suffered, which is tantamount to, I guess it's the same it's revenge porn. Yeah. Let's give her this. And also Chicago has always cast stunt done stunt casting. That's that's Erika Jayne. The real Housewives of Beverly Hills was the last person who party. I'm not getting you. Oh my God. Yeah, no, I, I, I think it says, yeah. And also you're right.2 (40m 22s):It's like, why not? Like why don't we might as well just like, let her have it. And also she couldn't be fucking good. I don't know from this lady, it could be great. And also like it's Chicago, it's not Shakespeare. Right? Public. I have such a fear. It's funny Shakespeare at the public story. You do well, you might have to tell it cause we might have no interviews today. That's right. We can talk anyway. So I love the Hamilton song, wait for it, which is Aaron Burr's song. And he's talking about his family. And anyway, I just wanted to hate it so much.2 (41m 4s):Gina. I wanted to like be the one person that was like, this is garbage and this is, I really wanted that. And then when I saw it, I was weeping openly. And the people next to me were like, cause they had seen it. Everyone's seen it a million times. Right. So people who go to the LA show have seen it like on Broadway or like the Disney plus online situation. I didn't see shit. It was my first experience. And I was like, this is the greatest thing that ever was ever made. It's just, okay, I'm going to have to watch it. I I've been a hater for no good reason. And I should probably watch it. I think the thing that was off putting to me initially is like how much people liked it and how much like, I mean, just like older, white people, I just thought, okay, well you're really excited to hear rapping in this anachronistic way, but I, I think many, many people who I respect greatly think it's one of the best pieces of I did.2 (42m 8s):And I also just think like, you're right. Like I think it's all a combo platter, like super, super, super, super white people. Love it. And also, and all people love it too. Right. I mean, girl, I don't know. I just feel like, yeah, that was, it was, it was brilliant. So like on my spare time, like I listened to the soundtrack and I never thought I would do that. It's a very motivating, like I oh, okay. And also like if it's even one 18 super true to history, which I think it is super true in a way, then I've learned more than I ever have about his American history. So like, oh my God.2 (42m 49s):That's that is, I believe that I learned what kind of learner I am when I was in ninth grade. Yeah. Ninth grade. I took a very hard history class. It was honors world civilization. Oh my God. I remember that class. I took the same class and got exams were oral. What? So the exams were oral. So basically you had to say the hits, the broad points of the history of civilization from beginning to now.2 (43m 32s):Sounds very scary. It wasn't at all. Oh, I memorized it like a monologue and I freaking learned the history of world civilization that way. And it was news to me that I could have read that textbook a million times. I could have studied flashcards. So the cows came home. I would net I got a perfect score on this exam. And it's because I learn kinesthetically. Yeah. I need to have a story and I need to be involved with yes. I mean to the one number one way I learn is teaching others. And, and the funny, because I, I hate teaching. I hate teaching my husband.2 (44m 13s):That's a very, I should say I hate teaching my husband, but like teaching people that, that don't make me insane. I, I learn it. Like I remember I was like the best trainer at my hostess job because I loved it. I was like, oh, Hey one, you get to train people how to do it the way you like it to be done. And also you get to relearn it. And also to refresher, I loved being the trainer. I was like, I will do the training. I will do the training. Interesting. Very interesting. Okay. So what is your story about what'd you say you had a story about, oh, oh, oh, oh shit.2 (44m 53s):We are old. What the fuck it was about? I, all I keep thinking of is Charleston fucking shoe, but I told that story, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute on it. Oh my God. We'd have to replay the fucking tape. Yo to little oh, oh Hamilton. Before we were talking about what was the first thing we were talking about. And I looked and I said it was when I was doing, see, we were distracted. We were both checking our emails, the email, when you, right. Well, anyway, I have a lot of shame stories, so it could be any kind of same story. So it was, oh, I said Monica times.2 (45m 34s):No, it was w it had something to do with like acting or Hamilton or I had a no, or, oh God. Or maybe you thought maybe it was maybe when I started talking about in content, maybe you said you had a story about Hamilton. No. And console, what side story? The acting all it. Well, I will tell you that, like, there is something about obviously the pandemic that has reignited my absolute awe for performers, that nail shit. Like I absolute all I I'm like, especially people that can sing and dance and act at the same time.2 (46m 15s):I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? I don't give a shit. So, oh. And the other thing that I was going to say about Hamilton was in the audience. People are like, like poo-pooing the LA production. They're like critiquing it at, at, at the, I was gonna say halftime at intermission. They're like talking shit about it. And I just said, the ladies next to me, because look, they've become so nitpicky because they've seen it for a thousand times in every different place and all that. And I'm like, I just turned to them. I was sitting by myself, she got me a solo ticket because they couldn't get tickets together with her sister and whatever. And the two ladies had clearly seen it. And the guy over here had been like, seen it like a million times.2 (46m 57s):And they were like talking to each other about like, oh, it's not that, you know, th this, the Hamilton's not that strong. And this is, and I said to me, I said to myself, and then I said to them, I said, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Can you do that? Let me just tell you something. Our fat ass is sitting over here. These people are throwing chairs around on stage also while singing and while remembering Lear rap lyrics, like shut up. Yeah. Shut up. Oh, by the way. So what's, how are you your rewatch of drag race? Okay. Much better. So, so I think at the time I, I obviously was youngers.2 (47m 38s):What were unseasoned? What 13, 18. I don't know. I think it's 13, which I'm crazy. So at the time, when I first watched the first season, whatever year that was in, I did not have any appreciation for healing of any kind. And I also didn't. I was so entrenched in my little world in Los Angeles that like I thought I saw drag race as a gag. Right. It was all a gag. A RuPaul was a gag. I didn't take it seriously. I was like super at 20 in my late twenties, early thirties. And it's really good. And it's also really, I'm not, so, yeah.2 (48m 18s):Right. I'm not so interested in the drama. Right. I'm interested in the artistry of the whole thing and how they create the costumes and the characters. And this time watching it, I'm like, oh, these people are brilliant. They're, they're brave and brilliant humans that are doing a really brave thing come that has come out of the need to sort of the, the revolutionary act of not wanting to shrink. Right. Of like gonna kill themselves if they don't do this. And I have to say, like, I only rewatched the first half of the first season, because then I got hooked into this Brazilian crime drama, which is a documentary about fucking crazy shit in Brazil.2 (49m 3s):Brazil is a terrible, I could never live in Brazil, but anyway, so, so drag race. Now I have such a new found respect for the performers. And also as, as a revolutionary drag, as a revolutionary act of self-preservation yes, yes. Agreed. And if you want to skip to the good stuff you could skip to season five, season five has, I'm sending myself a cast, quite a cast. And, and as time goes on, not only does the show get better because it has a bigger budget, but also Ru Paul is honing in on what he's, it's actually very, it reminded me a lot of your understanding of the meaning of our podcast as time has gone by.2 (49m 51s):And you've been saying for a long time, it's a service we're doing and it's offering healing to people. I think we're Paul figure that out, you know, throughout the course of, and he's, he leans much more heavily into people because almost everybody who is on there has been traumatized, abused, kicked out of their house. All the shit. Parents don't know that they're on drag race. Parents don't know that they do drag P they think it's. Yeah. So I think you'll really like that aspect of it. If you, you know, if you, if you like it enough to stick with it. And I also just think that I, there it is impossible. This is the conundrum of life.2 (50m 32s):It's impossible to not be a self-centered asshole when you're in your twenties and thirties or late thirties. Right. Right. Right. And so I look back at some of the shit I did and said, and thought about other people and their cultures and their, and I thought, oh my God, how dare I? I was, I, I was not, look, I'm not saying an awful person, but really the audacity of youth to be like, yeah, you're not cool. Or you, you, this doesn't benefit me in any way. So I'm not going to pay it any mind. In fact, I'm going to shit talk. It just, I mean, it's summed up with my John C. Riley story of never having seen Punchdrunk glove and talking shit about it to the star or no, not punch drunk, love to the star of boogie nights, the audacity of, of, of, of my youth and trauma and whatever to lie.2 (51m 29s):So blatantly and do it and lie about a mean thing. What are you, my take on that story has always been, you felt so less than yeah. With him. Yeah. That you, that you, which is not typical for you, that you, that you found a way to make him feel less than you. Oh yeah. It's not typical, but I do it. I do it with my husband all the time, which is like, if I'm, I'm now going through, I'm doing all this deep, deep trauma work in therapy and it's, and I'm also gonna start, I'm going to do an MDM age journey on it. So, so, but I'm doing all this stuff is coming up.2 (52m 10s):And I w when I am it's, so you've said it I've said it hurt people, hurt people, but it's very more specific than that. What happens to me is I sense it. I say the same thing when my husband hurts my feelings and it's really not my husband, it's, my feelings are hurt because I'm going through trauma, we're in a pandemic. And we live in a S in an end-stage capitalism. Like that's what's going on, but my husband is the trigger. And I will literally say things like I'm going to leave and not come back. And it is because I want to leave my trauma. I want to leave this shit show and go somewhere where I don't have to look at my trauma.2 (52m 52s):And I mean, that's exactly what I want to do. And so we have to, but that's what I do with John C. Riley. It's like, I, I'm not enough. I hate myself. And so I'm wanting to destroy you the way I feel destroyed. Literally. Yeah. It, it comes up so fucked up. I saw on the media about watching Tinder swindler.2 (53m 34s):Did you watch it? Yes. Okay. What it comes down to ladies and gentlemen is a study in why people hate women. It's really sad. It's like, really? But, you know, he targets women who are wanting love. Is this a documentary or a fictional documentary? Okay. And there might be a reenactments, but it's a documentary about eight, eight guy who Swindells women. But what you, what I was left with was okay. He picks on women who want love, who also want a man who is not broke and not, they don't have to pay his phone bill.2 (54m 16s):Right. Cause that's the experience of a lot of us. So when he, of course, when he, this swindler presents himself as, as rich as hell, that doesn't hurt. But then what you get is the backlash of people saying, well, that bitch was a gold Digger. She deserved to be swindled. So they got a huge backlash for being victims of this guy. It's horrific because if you weren't a gold Digger, then you wouldn't. So it comes down to, if you want to look at it as I couldn't have pure fun with it, because it was at the expense of women looking for love, and then being blamed as the victim, as a gold Dick. It's like, it's like sexism on task plus sexism on top of sexism.2 (54m 57s):And I though it didn't raise me. Maybe I'm not going to watch it. Not fun is what I'm saying. Maybe if it was a woman swindling, the men, I think that would have been a better, more, anti-Trump kind of a situation. But like what you're getting is a guy who's literally gaslighting women. And, and for, for, for, you know, I don't know, it's a five-hour situation. I want to watch a documentary called grinder finder, or they just follow guys having their random hookups. What I'm interested to know about that is people, I guess it's not just men, but people who pursue only the hookup on these apps is this satisfying.2 (55m 44s):I mean, is it like, yeah, I met this person. We had sex. I never saw them again. It was great. Or, or is there any bit of it? That's you know what I mean? Oh, I know what you mean. It doesn't work. Doesn't work. Does it feel good? I mean, what I'm led to believe about men, sexuality is this is ideal for them, you know, just a nameless, anonymous sex with no, I think it comes down to like what the intention is behind it. But like, I just, you know, whenever people talk about polyamory or, and this, this is different than just a hookup, I'm not comparing polyamory to just hook up culture.2 (56m 26s):But what I am saying is it a lifestyle that is different from mine that I don't understand whenever I think about engaging in behavior like that, whether it's having multiple partners or just had gone for the sex, what I end up with is depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation for myself. That's what I'm saying. Like, if you can do it without those things, I'm like, you go motherfuckers. But for me, I'm like, I don't see how this leads anywhere, but where I was at the age of 29, which was, yeah. And you know, then there's an argument to be made for, like, if you are in your twenties, you were going to do this one way or the other, you know, you're going to have these unsatisfying heartbreaking relationships one way or the other, maybe the advantage of doing it through these apps is that you have a little bit more data.2 (57m 16s):I mean, in the olden days, if you would just meet somebody and it was a one night stand and all you had was their Pedro, a number like that. That's all you had. That's all the information you had to go on this way. You can, which I've heard. It turns into a, a bad thing too. Like when people start stocking and they can't stop themselves from cyber-stalking like their one night stand their hookup. It's a double-edged sword. That would be me. I would be in jail if it were, if it were now I would be in jail for cyber-stalking like the only reason I'm not in jail for cyber-stalking is because we didn't have that because you were born in 1975.2 (57m 57s):Yeah. But I told you about the phone calls I made, right? No. Oh yes. When you called January. I think when the 85 times my boss was like, what? So that's probably a crime that's talking. So I am grateful that my, my anti-depressant has killed my sex drive in some ways. I'm also grateful to be married in some ways, like, look, do I miss the excitement of the chase of the, the, the, that, that butterflies in the stomach. I miss that, but I have to be honest, like the data for me, the evidence shows it never went in the right direction.2 (58m 37s):Like, no. And when you, and when your mind is all so consumed, and it is a nice feeling in a way, but when your mind is all so consumed by falling in love, everything else falls apart, you know what I mean? Like you stop pursuing your career, you stop pursuing like your other life goals. They had any kind of self care goes right out the window for me. And, you know, I'm and I did I ever tell you the story about the famous person who shall remain nameless? That I was in a, met in a, in a group setting that the trellis climbing incident. Okay. Okay. This is, this is fantastic. They needed to make a true crime about this. There's a woman who is who I'm not friends with in any way, but met, randomly and said we were, I was her, this is in I in 2000.2 (59m 23s):And like, I dunno, I dunno. I met her in Chicago and this was like, once I started to get better in my brain about that mental health stuff. We were, I was talking about how I was so dysfunctional in my relationships with men and she's like, oh, you think you're just functional? And this is a gorgeous, stunning lady that you're like, no problem. She's got no problem. She's like, you think that's just functional? I was like, oh God. Oh God. And she said, I was married before. And two, this guy who was a player and I was like, okay. And she's like, and I, I just was obsessed with him. And I knew, I knew that he was cheating and he admitted it.2 (1h 0m 4s):And so then he said he was gonna stop. And then I got pregnant. She says, and I got pregnant. And I had this feeling. He was still cheating, but he kept saying he wasn't right. So she's pregnant. And she, I don't know how many months pregnant. And she's like, he just kept, I just had that, this crazy feeling. And of course it was like, you know, he would tell me I was crazy. It was a whole gaslighting situation. But anyway, so she, in the middle of the night, he was on a business trip and in the middle of the night, she's like, I fucking have to know. I ha she's pregnant. I have to know she goes to his office. Cause that's where he kept it somewhere else in, in the city, not in their home. He, she knew that there was going to be information in the office, but she couldn't get it.2 (1h 0m 48s):Right. She fucking climbs a trellis, pregnant, a trellis, like a trellis, pregnant endangering her life, her baby's life, a criminal, whatever trespassing, even though some husband climbs breaks into his office with like punches, like puts a, a towel around her hand, breaks it breaks office and go through stuff. He's cheating. She finds all kinds of data on his. And she thought to herself, that's when I, she said, that's when I hit bought my bottle and she's sitting there like kind of bloodied.2 (1h 1m 28s):Cause it didn't work all the way to cover her hand bloodied with the evidence she was. Right. Of course. And I think, remind it reminded me of something that an ex of mine had said, when I went, go snooping through his phone, Dave, who then died, who that's, you know, my, my ex and I was snooping through it. It wasn't even really an ex, but he is stupid snooping through his phone. And he goes, look, if you need to Snoop, you're going to find something you don't want to see if you, if that instinct in you, is there. Yeah, it was right. He was absolutely right. I found all kinds of stuff that I didn't want to didn't want to say.2 (1h 2m 10s):So these are these stories that I'm like, oh my God, it doesn't matter what you look like. It doesn't matter. And my heart breaks for that Chloe Kardashians and her fucking, except at the same time, I'm like, okay, but you keep picking these guys. You keep picking these people who absolutely will 1000%, never, never, never not cheat on you. What are you going to do differently? And her answer so far is I'm going to get more plastic surgery. I'm going to diet more. I'm going to exercise. I mean, she has a whole show called revenge body. That is disgusting. That your whole reason for making your body into a certain way is to get revenge on somebody.2 (1h 2m 55s):Like, what are we doing? It's gone all the way left. You want to know even more fucking left. I met someone who was a fucking contestant on that show or like, cool, really? Oh, I actually, I didn't realize it was a shit contest show. They had like a, and she was so fucking crazy. I I've never met a crazier human being in my life. Like wow, never met a crazier human being in my life. And I have treated all levels of crazy. She was the craziest. But anyway, so yeah, you're right. It is the lengths weak, like using our bodies as a weapon, using our bodies, hurting our bodies. It is. And it's one of those things where even if we sat down, you know, Chloe, you, if you ever listened to the show, you're welcome to come on.2 (1h 3m 41s):But even if we sat down and said, all the things you will, people do not change until they are a, in enough pain to change or be angry enough to change. It has to come from within. So like, I'm not sure any amount of intervention with these people. And that's what this woman said. And I know it to be true for me until my dad died. And I was stripped of all resources. Was I able to see that my previous behavior in relationships, especially with men was toxic and killing me and not nice to them either. But it took, it took that it took everything being stripped from me too, to even make any kind of small change.2 (1h 4m 26s):So like, I'm not sure it's so it's such a hard job to try to help someone change because, because they have to do it on the, and so encoded. And because for me, I had, I had to walk such a distance to figure out that the problem was me. I had to try, I had to exhaust every other possibility of who else I could blame. I had to chalk my behavior up to absolutely anything, but what it was, which is I'm recapitulating the same situation that I was literally in coded to, to, to look for B because I, you know, had a father who rejected me, like, yeah.2 (1h 5m 13s):And, and, and, and, and it surprised, I think her father rejected, there's all this stuff about who is her father. And if it's, yeah. I mean, magic people thinking in a funny way that a, an accused double murderer, who is people, you know, who has a plethora of problems and his own trauma is your fucking unknown father. Fuck, that's his claim to fame. It's not right. So here's what I wish. I wish that we all find that in ourselves, that that point without so much pain, but it usually comes with pain to say, oh shit, I don't want to climb any more trellises.2 (1h 5m 55s):I just don't want to risk my life. And my unborn child's life or whatever was risk, whatever the risk is to, to try to, to get this love or this, what I think is going to be the fix for my internal whole, you know, like, I, I wish for us that we would do it in a way we could find that sort of, we could make the realization without having to go through so much heartache, but maybe it takes what it fucking takes. And it takes what it takes. I wish it was different, but a, because somebody could tell you all of these things, a future you could come to, to yourself at 20 and tell you these things.2 (1h 6m 38s):And you might still not believe them because you have to, you know, a lot of experiences you just have to have and told me, stop doing this to yourself. Older women that I was friends with were like, this guy doesn't love you. Like you, like, this is not what you think it is. I didn't get, I didn't pay him any mind. Yeah. Because it's the same thing. Like with theater school, like, yeah. But I'm the exception for me. It's different. You, that's fine for you to say for other people, but for me, it's different. Yeah. If you liked what you heard today, please give us a positive five star review and subscribe and tell your friends.2 (1h 7m 23s):I survived. Theater school is an undeniable ink production. Jen Bosworth, Ramirez, and Gina plegia are the co-hosts. This episode was produced, edited and sound next by Gina for more information about this podcast or other goings on of undeniable, Inc. Please visit our website@undeniablewriters.com. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Thank you.

Brian Love shares his heart for the town of Newberg and tells us why giving back to the community is so important to him. We also discussed what it means to "change the narrative" and how that idea can help us grow together as a community.Support the show (https://www.thejoyfulrobertsgroup.com/get-started)

Have you ever thought about moving into a leadership role? It can sound a bit daunting, perhaps scary, but also exciting. The idea of putting your hand to the wheel and directing the ship can be thrilling. Leading a team of individuals is a prospect that many people dream of.The Angular Show had an opportunity to sit down with Sam Julien, Director of Developer Relations at Auth0, to discuss his move from engineer, to DevRel, to Director of DevRel. Sam shares how he first learned that his passion was DevRel and then how he grew into a leader. Sam shares some great resources that he has used to learn the skills necessary to be an effective and compassionate leader of his team. He also shares some of the struggles and hurdles that he has faced on his journey.Grab your iced, double-shot, oat milk latte and join Aaron Frost, Jeniffer Wadella, and Brian Love as they chat with Sam about his journey. We also recognize that not everyone is passionate about leadership. That's cool - much respect. In fact, many organizations now have engineering-specific growth opportunities that prevent forcing people into leadership and management in order to gain increased visibility, compensation, and influence in an organization. Our hope is that this episode of the Angular Show will inspire the future leaders of tomorrow to step into the role of leadership if that is their passion.

Show Summary:We're back from our summer break and we're releasing a fresh episode of The Angular Show with a special guest, Mike Ryan, a Principal Architect with LiveLoveApp. Mike is a co-creator and member of the NgRx core team, a contributor to open-source, and a Google Developer Expert in Angular. Mike joins our panelists Aaron Frosts, Jennifer Wadella, and Brian Love, to chat about NgRx Effects best practices.NgRx is the defacto standard state management solution for Angular. While the core state module is highly inspired by Redux, the Effects library is unique to NgRx, and one of the best features of NgRx (in our humble opinion). NgRx Effects enable developers to perform side effects, like fetching data from an API, in an elegant and efficient manner. But, effects can also be tricky, hard to test, and sometimes it's not clear what RxJS operator is best suited for an effect.In this episode, we learn from Mike the best practices of using NgRx Effects, how to make them simpler, more maintainable, and easier to test. Plus, there are a handful of simple tips that you can walk away with and immediately improve the performance of your Angular application that is using NgRx Effects. Plus, if you've ever been unsure about which higher-order mapping operator (ya know, those somethingMap() ones) to use with an effect, Mike will break it all down for you in a straightforward way. This is an episode of The Angular Show that you do _not_ want to miss.Show Notes:- LiveLoveApp: https://liveloveapp.com- observer-spy library: https://github.com/hirezio/observer-spy- NgRx Effects: https://ngrx.io/guide/effects

How many domains do you currently own? One for your blog, maybe one for your email, a family website or two, oh, and of course a bunch of domains for those awesome side projects and ideas you have. Side projects can be fun, challenging, and rewarding. Have you ever thought about what it might take or look like to bootstrap your own side project and successfully launch a new startup?Join the panelists of the Angular Show as we have the opportunity to spend some time with Niall Crosby, the founder, and CEO of AG Grid. Niall shares with us the story of how he got started building AG Grid, some of the early decisions he made, and how he was able to bootstrap and launch a successful startup. AG Grid is the best JavaScript grid in the world. And, as such, it wasn't built in a day (kinda like Rome, which we think is quite promising). If you're not familiar with AG Grid, head over to thinkster.io or check out some of the free workshops that our very own Brian Love has delivered for teaching you AG Grid, from the basics to the most advanced use cases. This is an episode of the Angular Show that you don't want to miss, especially if you're eager to be an entrepreneur or if you're considering launching your own company.Show notes: Article about a story of ag-Grid https://medium.com/ag-grid/why-the-world-needed-another-angularjs-1-x-grid-17e522a53bc8Connect with us: Niall Crosby - https://www.linkedin.com/in/niallcrosby/?originalSubdomain=ukBrian F Love - @brian_loveAaron Frost - @aaronfrost

We here at the Angular Show strive to deliver fun, newsworthy, and exciting developments in the Angular community. And, while databases may not be something you are familiar with or really have to even worry about, we wanted to take a break from our usual programming to reflect briefly on data persistence. After all, you need to put your user data somewhere, and we don't recommend stuffing everything into localStorage.In this episode, panelists Brian Love, Jennifer Wadella, and Aaron Frost welcome Oren Eini, founder of RavenDB, to the Angular Show. Oren teaches us about some of the key decisions around structured vs unstructured databases (or SQL vs NoSQL in hipster developer parlance). With the boom of document-driven unstructured databases, we wanted to learn why you might choose this technology, the pitfalls and benefits, and what are the options out there. Of course, Oren has a bit of a bias for RavenDB, so we'll learn what RavenDB is all about and why it might be a good solution for your Angular application.Show Noteshttp://howfuckedismydatabase.com/nosql/Shadon: https://www.shodan.io/Data Breaches: https://www.informationisbeautiful.net/visualizations/worlds-biggest-data-breaches-hacks/Israel COVID Stats: https://datadashboard.health.gov.il/COVID-19/generalConnect with us:Brian F Love - @brian_loveAaron Frost - @aaronfrostJennifer Wadella - @likeOMGitsFEDAYOren Eini - @ayende

In the final part of our series on RxJS operators we welcome Zack DeRose, senior engineer at Nrwl, back to the show to learn about multicasting, error handling and utility operators. To kick things off we do a quick recap of hot vs cold Observables, unicast vs multicast, and then the Subject class as well as a few of its child-classes.You might be wondering, "What is a multicasted Observable; Why would I want that; and what is the implication for my application?" In short, the multicast operators provide the functionality to create a multicasted Observable (duh! and huh?). The complexity and confusion usually arise around what operators to choose from. Why would I choose publish() over shareReplay()? And, what about ref counting? Don't worry - panelists Aaron Frost, Brian Love, and Jennifer Wadella, along with our esteemed guest Zack, answer these very questions.We then go into detail on error handling in RxJS and the various operators for error handling, from catchError() to throwError(), and everything in between. Finally, we talk through various utility operators such as tap() and delay().While you don't need to have listened to the first 3 episodes on RxJS operators in this series to enjoy this episode, we do recommend you check them out if you haven't already. Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss a single episode of the Angular Show!Show Notes:WTF is a cold observable: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4btjdWHM6lI&ab_channel=AngularSeattleDeRose Hpothesis on Code Complexity: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9EZZDREMEk&t=779s&ab_channel=AngularSeattlezackderose.devMulticasting: https://dev.to/bitovi/understanding-multicasting-observables-in-angular-2371Connect with us:Brian F Love - @brian_loveAaron Frost - @aaronfrostJennifer Wadella - @likeOMGitsFEDAYZack DeRose - @zackderose

I had the honor to interview Brian Bogert who for me, is a real life superhero in a sense. He has dealt with his share of adversity and he continues to brush himself off while continuing to bust through barriers to create his best self. I admire all that he has accomplished in his life and he's here to help other accomplish the same and more. He goal to impact over a billion people is lofty yet if there is anyone who can do, I'm putting my money on Brian. This was a special episode as Brian was so gracious and share so much and sometimes the conversation gave me a lump in my throat as we went deep. I sure hope you enjoy this episode as much as I did creating it with Brian. Thanks for listening! Much love, Joe Brian Bogert: Human Behavior and Performance Coach, Keynote Speaker, YouTuber, Podcaster and Course Creator Founder - Brian Bogert Companies Website: https://brianbogert.com/ No Limits: https://brianbogert.com/no-limits/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bogertbrian/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bogertbrian YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmhaMgY8q-tMMCj0rpGg7iw LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-brian-bogert-companies/ Email: info@brianbogert.com Podcast Music By: Andy Galore, Album: "Out and About", Song: "Chicken & Scotch" 2014 Andy's Links: http://andygalore.com/ https://www.facebook.com/andygalorebass If you enjoy the podcast, would you please consider leaving a short review on Apple Podcasts/iTunes? It takes less than 60 seconds, and it really makes a difference in helping to convince hard-to-get guests. For show notes and past guests, please visit: https://joecostelloglobal.libsyn.com Subscribe, Rate & Review: I would love if you could subscribe to the podcast and leave an honest rating & review. This will encourage other people to listen and allow us to grow as a community. The bigger we get as a community, the bigger the impact we can have on the world. Sign up for Joe's email newsletter at: https://joecostelloglobal.com/#signup For transcripts of episodes, go to: https://joecostelloglobal.lybsyn.com Follow Joe: https://linktr.ee/joecostello Transcript Joe: Ok, today, I want to welcome my guests, Mr. Brian Boger. Brian, welcome.   Brian: What's up, Joe, I love I love that shirt you're rockin no limits, soldier, right there. I   Joe: Hey,   Brian: Love it.   Joe: There you go. You know what? So since we're talking about the shirt, we've brought it up. Explain to me the purpose behind this shirt. I know that you give all the money away to   Brian: One hundred   Joe: Charity.   Brian: Percent of the proceeds, huh? Yeah, so I'll first describe kind of what no limits is just high level and then we'll talk about kind of where this is. No limits is is part of our branding. And it's this belief that I genuinely feel like we all can live with no limits. It's not that we're unlimited and we can do anything we want. It's that we can live significantly beyond the limits we place on ourselves and certainly be on the way the world has placed limits on us. And so that infinity sign, there's a lot of intentionality around it, which is really about awareness and intentionality and how those weave together to help us find who we are so we can live with no limits with our life in alignment. And so as we've been building this brand, there's always been this altruistic philanthropic side of me. Everything I do and desire for me to be financially successful is also for my ability to distribute that wealth back out into the community. So when we had an opportunity that people started to really attach to the brand and what they were doing were like, you know what, let's make some apparel. And we've got, I think, five different t shirt designs, both in men and women. We actually also have a dog design, too. I'll explain that in a second.   Brian: But the reason we did it is one hundred percent just to allow people to attach to it. You see, there's not Brian Bogot companies and stuff written all over it. Right? It's really the infinity in no limits and embedding people in that. And one hundred percent of the proceeds are going to nonprofits that we're going to rotate on a quarterly basis. And so, you know, it's just another cool way. You know, I'm not gonna make a bunch of money off t shirts. That wasn't something that needed to move the needle. But, you know, people can attach to the brand and feel like they're doing something better. Their investments also helping more lives. And a big part of who I am, I'm on a mission to impact a billion lives by twenty, forty five. This is just another way to perpetuate that. The dog shirts are that we're an animal family and my wife is like obsessed with them. And she's like, we can't have apparel without matching dog apparel, which just saw me die laughing because I still think it's so ridiculous. But I love my wife to death and every time my animals wear clothing, it just makes me laugh. But it's been cool because, yeah, those are those who go to support our local Humane Society and ASPCA as well. So some of the proceeds.   Joe: That's great. Yeah, and it's a beautiful shirt. I'm always nervous about when you can't you can't feel it first, but when I took it out, I was like, I don't know. I've been in the gym a lot lately. I might be a little a little too big for him. It's like fit perfect. It makes me actually look better than I should look. So I   Brian: Well,   Joe: Appreciate   Brian: You know,   Joe: It.   Brian: I'm super anal about t shirts as well, so I'm actually happy that he said that because I before we ever posted them, before we started selling them, we actually tested a bunch of shirts. And I wanted to make sure that they fit and they felt like I like shirts to fit. Not that that means everybody else needs to like what I like. But I've had so many other t shirts and different apparel that they just don't fit right in. You never wear it. And I'm like, if I if I'm going to buy something for my own brand or have something for somebody else, I want something that people feel comfortable in.   Joe: Yeah,   Brian: So   Joe: Yeah,   Brian: I'm   Joe: So   Brian: Happy that you feel that way.   Joe: Yeah, and besides wearing it out like normal, like this with her jeans and whatever, I definitely am going to get some more because I think it's cool and it'll be a gym shirt for me. And then I think people will come to me and go, that's cool, what is that? And then send more people your way. So that's my goal.   Brian: I'm so grateful, yeah, for the gym one, you're going to get one of those embrace pain to avoid suffering shirts. That's   Joe: There you go. That's   Brian: That's   Joe: Right,   Brian: That's that's the motto in the gym that's   Joe: That's   Brian: Going to help push you, man.   Joe: Right. All right, deal. So I always I know you've told your story a zillion times, I'm sure. And I want you to tell as much or as little as you want to bring us up to today. So however, you can kind of let the audience   Brian: All   Joe: Know. Yeah.   Brian: Hold it a million times, so I feel like I know the points I want to hit, so I'll just I'll just run with it. I'm going to ask you and anybody who's listening, unless they're driving to just close your eyes for just one second. And I want you to imagine going to a store, having a successful shopping trip, heading back out to your car. And it's a beautiful day. And you think you're just going on with the rest of your life like it was just any other normal shopping trip. And then you get to your car and you turn your head and you see a truck barreling 40 miles an hour right at you with no time to react. Go and open your eyes. That's where this portion of my story begins. My mom, my brother and I went to our local Wal-Mart to get a one inch paint brush. And anybody who's known me followed me or even in the few minutes we've been talking can probably tell. I've always had a lot of energy. It's the first one of the car and not a surprise to my mom because I want to get home and put that paint brush to use. You know, this is back in the days, though, before they had key fobs. So I had to literally wait for my mom and brother to close the gap of those four or five feet, catch up, stick the key in the door and unlock it to get on the other way.   Brian: And as it happened, the truck pulls up in front of the store and a driver, a middle passenger, get out. And the passenger all the way to the right felt the truck moving backwards. So he did what any one of us would do, Joe, and he screwed up and put his foot on the brake instead of the gas combination of shock and forced Zoom up onto the steering wheel, up onto the dashboard. And before you know it, he's catapulting across the parking lot 40 miles an hour right at us with no time to react. Now, we were in that spot, so we went up into the median, went up to the car in the median, ultimately knocked me to the ground, ran over me diagonally, tore my spleen, left the tire tracks, scar on my stomach and continued on to completely sever my left arm from my body. So there I am laying on the parking lot on one hundred and fifty three day in Phoenix, Arizona, my mom and brother just watched the whole thing happen and they look up and they see my arm 10 feet away. Fortunately for me, so did my guardian angel. She saw the whole thing take place, she was a nurse that walked out of the store right when this happened.   Brian: She saw the literal life and limb scenario in front of her and she rushed immediately into action. She focused on life. First, she came over and stopped the bleeding and she saved my life. And then she instructed some innocent bystanders to run inside, grab a cooler filled with ice and get my detached limb on ice within minutes. Had she not done one or both of those things, I either wouldn't be here with you today or I'd be here with you today with the cleaned up stop. That's just the facts, right? So I will expedite a whole lot of the rest of that particular story. We can dig deeper if you want to. But as you can imagine, there was years of recovery that came from this. Twenty four surgeries and a whole lot of lessons and observations. What I've definitely learned is that I have an extremely unique story. I'm sure that your listeners weren't expecting it to go there today. But what I've also realized is that we actually all have unique stories. And what's important is that we pause and become aware of the lessons we can extract from those stories and then become intentional. How do we apply to our lives? And we all have the ability to do that. We also all have the ability to tap into the collective wisdom of other people's stories, to shorten our own curve, to learn something to share with you two primary ones.   Brian: And then we'll just see where the conversation goes. The first is I learned not to get stuck by what has happened to me, but instead get moved by what I can do with it, and the second I didn't realize until far later. I was a kid. I was seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12 years old when I was going through the meat of all of this. Yes, I was the one doing the the therapy. Yes, I was the one having the surgeries done to me. But I was also being guided through the process. So I was a little bit in a fog. My parents, however, were not they were intimately aware of the unceasing medical treatments, years of therapy and the idea of seeing their son grow up without the use of his left arm was a source of great potential suffering for them. So they willed themselves day in and day out to do what was necessary. It was tough to embrace the pains required to ultimately strengthen and heal me. So whether it was intentional or not, what they did was they ingrained in me a philosophy and a way of living which I embody and everything I do now, which was to embrace pain, to avoid suffering. And I believe when that's done right, that's also where we gain freedom.   Brian: So it's these concepts that I use to not only become this unique injury, but how my business partners and I scaled our last business to 15 million with the span of a decade. And now how is a human behavior performance coach and entrepreneur? I flip that on its head. You will have individuals and organizations just like you, just like the people listening, become more aware, more intentional, and who they already are, their most authentic selves. You see, I believe that's when magic starts to happen and the door starts to crack to perspective, motivation and direction. And that's when people have the opportunity to have joy, freedom and fulfillment and to back into their lives. And those are the reasons I'm spending the next twenty five years of my life committed to trying to impact a billion lives on this planet. Because if we can reduce the level of suffering that people experience, which there's a lot, and we give them the chance to experience joy, freedom and resentment, we give them the permission to be exactly who they are and know the world will embrace them and love them for exactly who they are. And we can bring vulnerability and authenticity into everything we do, which are the glue that binds human connection. Then we can come together and leave this world a lot more. Beautiful place for my kids, my grandkids.   Joe: Well, let me start here first. Do you still are you still in contact with that nurse?   Brian: You know, I am actually on a mission to find her right now. I've never spoken with her. And so part of the reason I also talk about that role in that process on so many platforms is I want there to be a lot of exposure and hopefully the world is going to help me track her down because I just want to say thank you.   Joe: Sure, that time that I've heard the story, it was like, I need to ask him that question, I'm just wondering if they're in connection with each other.   Brian: We're not I'm actively looking for her right now.   Joe: Got it during the time you were going to school. How did you handle I would assume you were treated differently, right,   Brian: Of   Joe: By   Brian: Course.   Joe: Your by your friends and teachers and they always whatever the case might be. How did you handle that?   Brian: Yes, so I think I handled it from a place to survive and protect myself, although I didn't realize that's what I was doing until far later. I didn't I didn't like being the center of attention and I didn't like. Being defined. By boundaries that were placed upon other people's view of what they'd be capable of in my scenario, and so I got this really adamant approach to I'm not going to be defined by those boundaries and I'm going to break beyond boundaries for my entire life, because why not? If I want to do something, the limitation is inside. Right. I need it. And there may be a physical limitation in some ways, but like I can always overcome the physical limitation. If I have a will and desire, that's great enough. But what happened right to protect myself is I created this intellectual narrative, which was I'm good, I'm strong, I'm capable. I don't need anybody's help. And it served me really well for a long time during that period of time, I was able to really hone my emotional intelligence because I got so good at wanting to divert attention from me that I got very strong in my ability to read people, read environments, read situations so that I could almost ensure that that attention wasn't on me. And so it honed those skill sets. And it also honed my mental toughness, which, again, I'm a huge believer is a big part of the equation to be kind of successful. That intellectual narrative ended up biting me later in life. And when I was 20 years old, I broke my arm in a snowboarding injury.   Brian: Compound fracture almost lost it again. And that was the moment that I realized the power of our narratives because the world bought into mine. I had I had sung that preached that narrative so strong. I never even said those words right. That's just the message that I was sending with my energy and how I showed up and how I interacted. And now all of a sudden, I'm in my most vulnerable period ever as an adult, not having the same infrastructure and support system that I had at home that I probably took for granted up until that point, how much support I had. Now, sitting in this vulnerable position, I didn't have the courage to ask for help. So I had a lot of friends, a lot of family. Nobody showed up and they didn't show because they didn't love me or didn't care about me. And they showed up because they just believe Brian's goody strong is capable. He doesn't need anybody else. And so that's kind of the during that whole school adolescent period. Right. It was really about me proving that I could overcome the physical limitations, that I could protect myself, that I could get myself there. But what I really downplayed the importance of was the importance of human connection. So that whole next year of my life, I shifted to vulnerability and authenticity and how do I hone the relationships that I was developing so strongly through emotional intelligence to be able to focus on a true connection.   Joe: So it sounds like your parents were super special. Did they go out of their way and whatever normal way for them to handle it, to not limit you from doing anything like when somebody knocked on your door and said, hey, can Brian come out and play and we're going to play football? Did they say, Brian, go have fun? Like, is   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: That the approach they took?   Brian: You know, nobody's ever asked me that question, you just gave me chills when you asked that. I think it's a blend, honestly. They did. They never wanted to be the reason that I didn't do something. But as you would expect, all parents have a protection mechanism that kicks in. So immediately after the accident, I was I was in slings and during surgeries for a few years. And so that first year after the accident, no, I wasn't going out and playing at the level that I would have right between seven and eight. But it wasn't long after that that it was it opened up. We started having good friends in the neighborhood. We played football in the street. We played basketball on the street. We rode bikes nonstop. And so they were never going to tell me that I couldn't do those things. Now, what they didn't want me to do, they didn't want me to join a football team where we were playing tackle because for obvious reasons, I get hit really hard on that arm. Even though the doctor said the bone wasn't strong, we don't know. Right. So so they would limit it in terms of like, exactly the application. But at the same time, they got so used to me doing what I was doing that whenever the phone rang and it was somebody a number that my mom didn't know back then, she was expecting insert branded something again because I needed I think they appreciated the fact that that's who I was when I was born.   Brian: I mean, I was always the guy that was pushing the limits even before this. This gave me perspective in humility that I wouldn't have had otherwise. And so they at least were aware enough to recognize, like Brian's got a higher risk threshold and probably has an even higher one after the accident than he would have had anyway. And they they knew that they needed to give me those outlets to be able to spread my wings and be free. So they always encouraged. Right. Like, if I wanted to go mountain bike and do jumps, they'd be like, OK, you're going to get hurt. And then if I got hurt, we'd figure it out. Right? I mean, within reason, they gave me the freedom. I think they made the right decision to not let me play tackle football. Who knows what could have happened, but did I play on other sports teams? Absolutely. So, yeah, I think my parents really did encourage and they still do to this day, despite the fact that they know you know, I think my mom has just gotten used to constantly being on edge, like expecting that Brian is going to do something crazy and get hurt. That's how we find our limits in this world, is we've got to push them.   Joe: Well, tell her to not follow your Instagram account so she doesn't have to see you squatting. Four hundred pounds. I saw that. I saw the photo of you sitting there. I'm like, oh, my gosh, I can't watch this. This is killing me.   Brian: Well, I mean, and that's one of those things I had to learn, right? I mean, my biggest limitation for some of those things is my hand strength. And so I have to get creative and I figure out how to do things. And when I first started deadlifting, I mean, I knew I couldn't deadlift with a normal bar because of the imbalance in my body already, but I could deadlift with a bar and protect myself for the most part. Well, that worked really well until the one time that my strap broke   Joe: Oh.   Brian: While I was lifting. And this was like early on. So I had to, like, learn these things. Well, my instinct wasn't to just let go of the bar on the other side. And I think so what you saw the other day, I wasn't 400 pounds. I think it was two hundred and   Joe: Yeah,   Brian: Forty.   Joe: I know, I just I couldn't remember,   Brian: But   Joe: But.   Brian: But I but I have I have reps significantly above 300 pounds. I don't say that to impress. I rest to the point I was doing that in this one scenario when the strap broke and I didn't let go on my right hand because it wasn't instinct, because I wasn't expecting the strap to break. And this was a learning experience because it tweaked me really bad. And I mean, I didn't deadlift for a few months after that. I had to recover. But once I started getting back into it, it changed my form. It changed my focus, it changed my attention. And now I'm like intimately aware of, like every movement on the strap. And I'm like ready at any moment to just drop so that I don't tweak my back. But my core strength is a big part of my ability to not be in debilitating pain every single day. Those deadlifts keeping my upper thoracic, keeping my shoulders, keeping my back because I don't have a lot on the left side of my back, keeping them strong is essential for me to not be literally in debilitating pain every day.   Brian: And so those are the those are the pains I have to embrace. I've got to embrace the pain of figuring out how do I lift in a way that pushes my body, gets the hip hinge in there, gets the movement, my back and my core strength and all that stuff engaged in a way that's going to allow me to maintain a livable amount of pain in my back because the imbalance versus debilitating suffering. So it's funny that you mention that. But yeah, I think my mom is just used to it. My wife is too. I mean, my wife is incredible. She literally is like I know that if you set your mind to something, you're just going to go do it. And there's a high degree. At some point you going to get hurt. She's like, but what am I going to, like, box you in and continue? Like, you're just going to go do it anyway. I was like, yeah, see, like, I love that, right? It's like just let people let people spread their wings.   Joe: That's right. Well, that's great before we get off of this subject and move on. I know that you and Blake do mountain biking,   Brian: Yeah, we do,   Joe: Right?   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: And that's like a big thing he loves to do with you and you with him. And so that's got to be at least I mean, I've done it and that's a lot on the arms.   Brian: Yes, so what's funny is I have no other perspective because I didn't learn how to mountain bike until after my injury, I didn't I didn't learn how to mountain bike when my when my son did at five and six and seven. So, yeah. It isn't in balance. Yeah, it is difficult. And I did it for almost. Let's see, I did it for probably 20 years before I actually started adapting my bike. And so there's no tricep, so Tricep and Laerte are the two muscles that you absorb, all of it, all of the impact with when you're mountain biking outside of the suspension. So I don't have a lot of tricep. So there's an automatic imbalance in my body, but I've learned how to balance it because I didn't know any other way and I was motivated and wanted to do it. Mountain biking is one of the few places that I'm absolutely free. And the reason I'm absolutely free there is I don't have the ability to think about anything else. Almost any other workout I do, almost anything I do like there's time to think. Mountain biking, you've done it right. You know, like you've got to be on your game.   Brian: One hundred percent focused on what's ahead of you. And so because of that, I've learned how to how to modify my body, my weight distribution, the way that I actually handle the handlebars. But two years ago about I started researching modifications for people with upper extremity injuries. And I landed with this company in the UK that they're actually right now building a product for me that I think is going to take my mountain biking to the next level, which is cool. But what I did is I got a steering stabilizer almost like the ones they have on their bikes. There's a company in the US called Hoby and they make these steering stabilizers for for mountain bikes. So I ended up getting that which what it essentially does is it's a spring unit which snaps the bars back to being straight. I thought it was going to help me more going downhill than uphill. What's crazy is it's actually helped my climbing more than anything because I can pick a line and put all the power I need to in the pedals and not worry about the imbalance in the handles, because it'll it'll keep my lane pure   Joe: Yeah.   Brian: And with slight, rigid and then downhill. It just gives me more confidence as well, because if I were to hit a bump and it goes on the left side, your weight goes forward, the handlebars collapse. Right. And just like twist the bars, this steering stabilizer stabilizer allows me to balance it with the muscle structure having the right arm and how I can balance my body on the left and then hope, hope he breaks is also another brand that I actually found out they just released this last year, a brake unit that has two master cylinders in one unit so you can have your front and your rear brake both on the same side. I've always never used the front brake in mountain biking   Joe: Sure,   Brian: Because my right   Joe: All that   Brian: Side   Joe: Pressure.   Brian: Is always   Joe: Yes.   Brian: What you want to be able to use primarily anyway, right? Whereas road biking, which I do a lot of the front brake is more important. Mountain biking, the rear one's more important. So I was always able to get around the corners, but I never had the confidence that I could actually stop and modulate my brakes effectively. So I would take things a little more cautiously now that I have these brakes on both sides and I can truly modulate, like just with, like little twitches in my fingers and the steering stabilizer and it's changed my mountain biking game. I can go out there and rip at a level that I've never been able to with confidence. And then there's like I said, these are these two other products that I'm really excited about. But, you know, one of the things I never knew any different, I wanted to do it and I figured it out. And I think that, again, that's one of those things that I could have just told myself, like, nope, you can't do it. You don't have tricep, you don't have a lot. But I genuinely believe if you want something badly enough and you take the time to think, plan and put things into trial and error, you start to realize you can do a lot more than what the world conditions us to believe we're capable of. Mountain biking is just another example for me on many things that I've been able to break those boundaries and expectations. I see I go mountain biking. People are like, how do you do it? I'm like, how do you do it? I mean, you could you could explain to me with a fully abled body how you do it, but I wouldn't understand because that's not my experience.   Joe: Yeah, that's crazy. So, Blake, is your son Addisons, your beautiful redheaded little daughter? With what happened to you, do you believe that certain people on this earth are have the power to get through some of these things where I just think about what you've gone through? I think about even my own brother, who, when he was young, why they were there at my parents house, they were splitting wood with one of those hydraulic splitters. That goes really slow. Right. But the   Brian: Oh,   Joe: Log   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: Slipped and he had like these two fingers crushed   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: And   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: Then, you know, reconstructed but not usable in a sense. Then he lost his son at 21 years old in a car accident. And I think about this and I go, God, I. I am not I don't have the capacity to handle something like that. And I guess when it happens, it's different. Right? You figure it out. But I almost feel like certain people I don't know if they just they're born to be able to handle these things. And if this is more for the audience   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: That might hear this and go, oh, God, there's all of these things that come into people's lives that they're they're given to deal with whatever that might be. And is it just the chosen ones that can handle it? That's why they've it just doesn't make any sense to me. So that's.   Brian: Yeah, so. I really appreciate the direction your questions are going. By the way, I just have to compliment you on that. You're asking a depth of questions that don't often get contemplated. And I think that there's a lot of truth behind even what you said. You know, it's interesting if you even think about what you just said when you were talking about your brother, you say, I look at him and I'm not sure that I could have handled it. And the reason I pay attention to that is because that is what I truly believe in, how the world has viewed me, they have viewed my limits through their own lens of what they believe they're capable of. I don't think that people truly know what they're capable of until they're tested. And that can be done either intentionally or externally, right? Sometimes we get tested not by our choice. Clearly getting run over by a truck was not by my choice, but it was a test. And I could show my strength to myself into the world by how I stood back up and what I've now done with it. Why I say I have a unique story is it doesn't matter the trauma that I experienced because it's unique solely to me. The trauma that your brother experienced, the trauma that other people experience with divorce or loss of a loved one or financial despair or like you name it, we all have our own unique challenges that we face. And I don't care who you are, if you're still on this planet and you're still standing. You are a survivor. None of us get through this world unscathed.   Brian: None of us. Perspective allows us to really pay attention to what other people are going through, but what perspective is really doing is allowing us the opportunity to get in someone else's world to gain perspective, to apply to our own. So it's not necessarily about what each one of us are inherently able to handle. It's that I think we're all dealt a unique set of cards and it's how we play those cards that matter. So the thing about pain, and I'm just going to speak to that, because my experience was pain, your brother's experience was pain. He had physical pain, probably emotional and spiritual pain with the loss of two fingers and a deep emotional, mental, spiritual, and probably manifested as physical pain with the loss of his son. Pain, that's what it is. Now, pain can't be measured independent of the person experiencing it. But the one thing we know is that it's a universal human experience, we all experience pain. And so what's important is not to question can I or could I have handled that? But just to say I've handled everything that's ever been thrown my way and I'm still standing here today. So what that tells me is you're probably capable of handling a lot more than you thought you were capable of at a prior period in your life. And if something were to happen that's devastating, right in that moment, you have to choose, is this going to define me and keep me stuck or am I going to use this as fuel to who I'm capable of becoming because of what I've gone through? That's why I said earlier I learned not to get stuck by what's happened to me, but I get moved by what I can do with it.   Brian: I realize I have a gift not just in my own natural abilities and gifts and intuition and emotional intelligence and all the things. But this has given me perspective that I couldn't I couldn't have gained any other way. I can put myself in other people's shoes and know what it feels like to not be seen, to know what it feels like, to feel like nobody understands me, to know what it feels like, to have people question everything I'm capable of for my entire life, even if it has nothing to do with my physical ability, even if it's one hundred percent mental, one hundred percent job and application, they view me. As not capable of doing I know what that feels like and I've had to battle that my whole life, I don't know a single person on this planet who has never felt that way. We all feel that we all experience and it's real to each one of us uniquely so I know it's probably a lot longer of an answer than you were hoping for, but the depth of the question, I think, required that approach because it's not about what you believe you could handle based on other people's circumstances. It's about what you already have handled and what you're very capable of handling if you change the way you think and feel about what you're capable of, which, again, is typically limiting in our own belief system.   Joe: So because we're doing this recording and you and I have not talked about what we could talk about or what we couldn't talk about, I want to ask this and obviously I can always edit it out. And you   Brian: Free   Joe: Know   Brian: Game, buddy, go ahead, go ahead.   Joe: What? So when does someone say, like, did you ever have these dark moments? And this is not the part of the question that I'm going to ask. This is just in front of it. And you ever have a moment that you said, why me? Like, did you ever   Brian: Absolutely.   Joe: Ok?   Brian: Absolutely, and I have those moments still today when I get when I get hit with certain things. The reason I was able to shift out of that so quickly, I remember being seven years old and that was the first thing I remember when I woke up, one feeling like it was a dream. And then I was like in this hazy state of like what this altered reality felt like, it didn't feel real. And then it was probably a day or two before I really came to and was like awake, awake, not just like in that dazed awake. At least this is from memory, I don't know the exact timeline. This is just how I feel it. And I literally remember. That question. Weiming. What is the rest of my life going to look like, like this sucks. I felt sorry for myself. I was given the opportunity to snap out of that quickly because the uniqueness of my story drew a lot of attention to it and there was a lot of families in the ICU with us who were coming up to us saying, we're so sorry for what happened to you. This is so horrible. We can't believe how hard this must be for you as a family. Let us know whatever we can do to help. Just getting wrapped with love and support from strangers to strangers saved my life. Right. That's crazy to think about. A stranger went into action and saved my life. Had she not chosen to do that, I wouldn't be here.   Brian: So I don't take that lightly, but what's happening in the ICU with these families is we start to realize that these families that are giving us just unfiltered support. Are also questioning whether or not their kid is going to survive another 30 days from the terminal illness that they're in the ICU with. Only immediate threat to my life and not at that moment knowing whether or not I'd be able to use my arm. I knew I'd be alive and over the course of the next ten years, being with those kids and all of us who wanted to rally around this cause to help more people, to bring perspective, motivation, direction to an organization that helped us so holistically in a healing process, either physically, emotionally, spiritually, whatever. Right. I lost multiple of them to their terminal illnesses over the course of the next ten years. And so although I don't think about them every day, when I'm asked questions like that, it really centers me on grounds me because I'm here happy, healthy and productive, living a life that many would dream of. And those kids didn't have the opportunity to do so. And so I have to just know and honor that it was me for a lot of reasons, I might not know all those reasons in this lifetime, I believe I know a lot of them at this point, but I still ask that question. I mean, last week was an unbelievably challenging week for me.   Joe: I saw the story and, yeah, that's part of where,   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: You know, this   Brian: I mean,   Joe: Is   Brian: Last   Joe: Going.   Brian: Week   Joe: Yeah.   Brian: Was an unbelievably challenging week for me, for a variety of reasons. One was around this fabricated reality, around a date that in some ways is very significant, in other ways is not significant. But coincidentally or coincidentally, I got kicked in the stomach multiple times last week. And yet it didn't really totally faze me in a way that brought me down to the deepest, darkest moments, because every time I face those things, every time I start to ask the question, why me? It starts to reveal itself faster and faster the more I go through the pain. And and and so I now have this element of trust in surrender where the literally last week I was like, why do I always have this stuff happening? Why am I the one that has to deal with this? Literally? I mean, I said to my wife last week and then in the same breath, I'm like, I know why. And so for those that did ask that question still. I would just encourage you to recognize that there absolutely is a resum. Nothing happens by accident. You could call this my accident, but this was for a purpose, it wasn't on purpose, but it was for a purpose. And I realize that now more holistically than I have in my entire life, but it's the same thing for everybody else. I mean, I guarantee that your brother has learned from his experiences and having to adapt and do things with the loss of two fingers. He's had to learn and adapt. What does it mean to be a parent? And there's so many are out there who live on their lives without their child. Still a part of it. Parents aren't meant to outlive their kids.   Joe: Correct. What's   Brian: Right,   Joe: The what   Brian: And.   Joe: The worst car I could think of?   Brian: And by the way, there was this pending doom around this date last week that was connected to that for me, as well as from a parent's lens now. And the data is reference to a couple times I didn't I didn't say specifically on the show, but this last Saturday, March 6th, was the day that my son, who's my little clone, my little mini me, my my only boy and my oldest. Was the exact same age to the day that I was on the day of my injury. Twenty nine years separated. And. There was a lot to that most of what happened in the 10 days leading up to it had nothing to do with my son. But they were absolutely clarifying moments that needed to take place in that window. And Saturday was kind of a new start for me and a whole variety of ways, which was just unbelievably cleansing and freeing and purifying. And so even the questions last week, why me? Why does this always happen to me? Why do I have to be the one to do this? We're very clear. I know, and I think all of us do we just fight and we resist because it's not in alignment with what the world tells us. It's not in alignment with what the narrative is externally. Right. But it's not about being the victim. It's about recognizing that if we have ownership and accountability with everything we do, we recognize that there's always a reason, there's always a cause, and there's always a way through it if we desire it enough. That's when we start to become free.   Joe: Ok, so here's the the part where I want to talk about Blake and Addison really quickly, I don't want to stay because, you know, I know you're super productive, positive guy. And I don't want this episode to be like the Debbie Downer episode. But you went through a lot in your life up to this   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: Point. Right.   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: And   Brian: A lot.   Joe: Then, Blake, I remember you talking about this, so I'm only bringing this up because I think you've talked about   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: It and.   Brian: I've shared publicly on stuff, I'm sure I know where you're going,   Joe: Yeah,   Brian: But go ahead.   Joe: So so you said it is is on the spectrum, right, and so you there's an extra amount of attention that has to happen   Brian: Of course,   Joe: There. Right.   Brian: Of course.   Joe: So then you deal with that another moment where you said, why me? Like, I haven't I haven't. I gone through enough. Why me? Right. And then now you have yet a third time now with with Adderson with her here. Right. And I could be another time we go. What is it going to stop. Like why me. Right. I'm sure there's people out there that do not handle this anywhere near as well as you do. And I'm hoping your words of wisdom, if they run across this episode, that it will help them understand how you I mean, you can look at their beautiful faces and go, oh, it doesn't matter. You know, they're amazing. It just it's a it's a small little blip on the radar. But it's still some people can't even handle the bullet. So   Brian: They   Joe: That's,   Brian: Can't.   Joe: You   Brian: They   Joe: Know.   Brian: Can't. And by the way, there's a lot more depth and truth to that statement than than you probably even realized, I mean, to the point that when we found out about our daughter's hearing loss. The audiologist actually said to us she does have loss and she could benefit from hearing devices. And I paused and I said. She could benefit, like are you saying she needs hearing aids, like is her hearing profound enough that it's not like she would benefit? She she needs it to restore it to what we would expect are going to be? And she said, yeah. I said, why didn't you just say that? And she said, because most parents don't want to hear it. And she said that even when they do want to hear it, she said, because of the reports that we get when we plug in hearing aids, even if they go through the process of getting hearing aids, even if they go through the process of doing these things, she said. Most kids, the hearing aids live in a drawer. Because of some reason, right, that either the parents don't think it's important they're embarrassed by their kid or whatever, like there's a whole slew of things. You're exactly right. And in both those moments, by the way, when we found out about our son's diagnosis on the autism spectrum and we found out about our daughter.   Brian: It was it was challenging, right? It was absolutely challenging for both my wife and I and we both we both grieved in different ways. And why I choose the word grieve is any time we have a vision for our lives. And that reality that we've created gets stolen from us, we experience loss. We literally go through the grieving process, the multiple steps of grieving, sometimes it's anger that manifest first, sometimes it's just like absolute depression. But but recognize it for what it is like having something happen to your kid and realizing that they might have an altered future from what you always desired and hoped for them. You have to process that, but then once you process that and you start to realize like this doesn't define the kid, just like a mine accident didn't define me right. What this really does is it's a gift because what getting both of their diagnosis is as early as we did, what allows us to do is wrap them with services, wrap them with all the support they need to close the gap between whatever their diagnosis limits them from doing to what a typical kid might be capable of doing. It shortens that gap early in those foundational early development years so that it won't really ever hurt them.   Brian: Plus, the more that we talk about it not as an ailment, but just a part of who they are, right. It's no longer a label. It becomes a term of empowerment because they recognize that like they have superpowers as a result of what their diagnoses are. So the answer is yes. There's there was absolute grieving for both my wife and I, for both children. We're well beyond that at this point. But it hung with us for a while. And and there are still moments where the difficulty and complexity of our household that most people will never understand and ours is light compared to what some other people's situations are. Right. So we keep that in perspective, too. Is it harder than most parents and most households might have to be? We believe so, but it's not about like we have got it more difficult than what they have. It's just this is the cards were dealt, so we're going to play them as best we can for both of our kids. We know how lucky they are to have us. My wife is brilliant. My wife is brilliant and what she has done to allow our kids to feel authentically who they are in safe, despite all of these things, despite the fact that they know they're different in certain ways and honoring and cherishing, encouraging them to just make do the things that make their hearts happy and stand up for what is right and know that they're worthy of receiving love like exponentially.   Brian: And all these things, like my wife and I were partners, but our kids are lucky to have us at the counter to that is we also feel extremely privileged to have our kids because they have challenged me to go to depths of myself, my soul, my emotions that allow me to be more effective in the world. That had I not recognized those scenarios for what they were, which is we can handle them and let's figure out the plan forward. It probably would have made me feel stuck longer than it did. And so for those parents that are listening out there that might have kids like this or even if there's not a diagnosis, but you just have a challenging time or there's an injury or there's something like, again, nothing happens by accident. And so the only way through it is through it, and if you if you desire something on the other side, then you've got to go through and that's really what it comes down to.   Joe: Really powerful and I appreciate you sharing leading up to this interview, I wanted to talk about those things and I was just like, I know he's talked about it, but I I didn't know how to actually go after it and   Brian: You did it beautifully, my friend, it was   Joe: Think   Brian: Great.   Joe: I'm grateful that you shared. And so, OK, so now you and I know this is a big jump, but I just want to I know we   Brian: Yeah,   Joe: Have limited   Brian: No, let's go. We got it, yeah.   Joe: We have limited time and I don't and I want to get to where you are today. So then you get into the insurance business. Correct. So you're in that for you grew a company. I think it was from like.   Brian: Quarter million to 15 million over the span of a decade.   Joe: You just picked that that was just a career that you pick at one point and.   Brian: Yeah, you know what's funny, I saw depicted it sort of picked me up, I was my junior year in college, was deciding that I needed to go get an internship. And so I started looking at a whole bunch different places. And I actually ended up getting into insurance because my one of my childhood friends and my childhood girlfriend, in fact, that we grew up together. And a lot of ways I always had her parents were like second parents to me for a lot of years. And I always had a great lot of respect. But I always viewed her dad as this very successful man. But I knew nothing about what he did. And I reached out to him as a mentor, frankly, and just said, hey, I'm going out. I'm doing these interviews and I have these things. And I talked to my own parents and they're successful. They've done these things as well. But I wanted extra perspectives. And he ultimately was like, I'm going to pass on your resume to so-and-so. And if you don't get a call in three days, call me. I was like, OK, not a clue what it was. It was the only one that was in insurance. Right. Very, very amazing opportunity. And it just took off from there. And nobody grows up wanting to be an insurance, right? I mean, and if they do and if you're listening to this, I apologize if you always had a desire to be an insurance. I know there's some people who love it. I never loved it. It was a great vehicle for me. And it was a great testing ground for me to grow and develop who I was as a professional, who I was as a man. I kind of grew up in it, but yeah, no, I didn't seek out insurance. I kind of fell into it and it just it fit.   Joe: Right. So while you were there with your inner voice saying there's more out there for me, I want to do more, whatever it might be. I mean, how did you make the jump then when you left   Brian: Yeah.   Joe: There to now what you're doing, which is the coaching and the speaking and and the podcast. And I mean, I, I look at your website and I get tired just looking at all the all the different menus that I could take a look at stuff. And then I went into the podcast when I was like, wait, is he doing actually three podcasts? Like, how is he doing all this? So how did you decide how did you decide you were going to leave insurance and then pursue the Brian Bogot we know today?   Brian: Yes, so I'm going to start with the first question you asked, which was, did I always know? I knew for a long time I've always had this gut feeling that like there was something meaningful that I was meant to do. No idea what that meant. OK. And then I conditioned that out of myself, and when I first got out of college, it was like bright eyed and bushy tailed, I was going to go take over the world and make a ton of money. Right. I'm going I'm literally going to be running the company. I'm going to climb the corporate ladder. I mean, it was all external. And, you know, this is one of the things I talk about now is I chased the what like so many of us did. Right? I chased what house, what car, what amount of money, what amount of success, what image do I want to portray? What, what, what, what, what. And I lost the who along the way. And I woke up one day after having accomplished all the words that I ever desired, way earlier than I thought I would have, in a way bigger level than I ever thought I would. And I realized, like, what have I been doing all this for? The more money I made, the less I cared about money, the more I got into a successful career, the more I was like, why am I doing to myself? And then I'm running in circles with people making six, seven, eight figures who all were having high of success and they were all miserable to.   Brian: And so those were the turning turning point moments over the probably the last seven to eight years, maybe six, seven years, if I'm being real honest, because when I first started coaching, it was because I had my son and I always said that I'm going to do everything for the benefit of my family always. And I did. But then six months went by when my son like that and I realized I missed all of it except the first week because I was burning the candle at both ends, I was still living the life that I was to create this abundant amount of external success and validation that I needed to prove to myself I could do it and I never recalibrated my life. So part of providing everything for my family is with finances and security and opportunity and safety and all those things. But but but it's also love and leadership and presence and connection. And I don't want to be that guy that did everything for his family, then woke up twenty five years later and never had a relationship with any of them.   Brian: They decided that I didn't serve a role for them outside of money. It's not all about money. It never was all about money. And so it was the first in my life. I didn't have the people in my life, the mentors, the experience or the intellect myself to figure out how to fix it. So I hired my first coach. And he said to me, a month of working together, because you're going to be doing this, like, what are you talking about? He said you need to be coaching and speaking. So you've been on stages since you were seven because you've got a unique ability or a unique story and you have an ability that you're not afraid in front of groups. And he's like, you're all about building people and building businesses. Like you're always helping. You're always finding ways to level people up. You're always helping them connect dots. And I was like, yeah, whatever. I was like, I'm paying you a lot of money. Not that's how great I have to figure out this stuff. And I completely threw it out the window. And then it just kept trickling. It kept trickling in every single month for about nine months.   Brian: And then this crazy experience happened, which again, nothing happens by accident. But the universe gave me the sign that I needed, which was he told me what I needed to hear, not what I wanted to hear. And that's when I started to desire a little bit more and started to feel like maybe I wasn't in alignment. But I had to ask the question if I'm going to jump in being in coaching, is this complementary or conflicting to everything else I had because I was so significantly invested mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually and monetarily. Right. In this other business that we built, that was the fruits of its labor were just starting to pay off. And it's like, let's let's make sure that we forge ahead on what we're doing here. So I started coaching and speaking and I did it alongside for about five years and then summer of twenty nineteen comes around. And again, I told you, I'm running in circles with people that are miserable. And I realized my relationship with my clients started shifting to more coaching relationships. We were placing multi million, hundreds of millions, tens of millions of dollars of insurance for people. And my conversations had nothing to do with insurance with the people that I was actually interacting   Joe: Right.   Brian: With at the C Suite.   Joe: Yeah.   Brian: Right. I was coaching them on how to be better people, how to be better leaders, how to change the culture of their business, think through and problem solve on things that really had nothing to do with insurance. But the insurance was how we were in the door. And so the more that started to migrate, we have this connection moment summer twenty nineteen with my wife and I. We go away for a weekend and it was one of those that like mentally, spiritually, physically and emotionally, like brother, like our souls were bonded like we were one and we're driving back to pick up our kids and she looks, everybody goes, how would you feel if you did have to go to the office on Monday morning? And I was like, that's a pretty loaded question.   Joe: No.   Brian: Why don't you tell me more? Well, I had some other I had some other health stuff that impacted me pretty significantly a few years back. I'm good now. It's all all squared away. But she said, I think you let some of this stuff allow fear to enter into your world in a way I've never seen you operate. She said, I feel like you've convinced yourself that we need the money, the status, the prestige, the security, the all of the above, what's been built. She said, I'm here to tell you we don't I don't care if we live in a cardboard box. What we need is one hundred percent of you. And she said, I don't know if you see it or not, but I see you dying a little bit inside every single day. You live in insurance. And and so she said, I think you're barely scraping the surface of your potential, nor do I think you have any impact on the world that you want. And then she said, you know, there's nobody on this planet I'd rather take a bet on than you. We took a big bet on you once and it paid off. Why don't we double down on that bet and see what you can do? And so, you know, this was one of those moments where I was flooded with fear, flooded with a whole bunch of emotions. And I had to spend three months really unpacking it with complete awareness, complete intentionality, understanding where my blocks were and ultimately came to the decision that I needed to embrace the pain of walking away from the easy button, from the sure thing, to avoid the suffering of not ever knowing what I could become or what I'd be capable of doing from an impact perspective.   Brian: So you fast forward to today and you know, I spent 10 months unpacking that business left at the time, the best year ever in that industry, the year I left and was simultaneously building the foundation for where we could go. And, you know, I'm not sure if I said it or not yet on this show. I think I did. Yeah, but but that's that's now where I'm so clear and convicted on this billion lives. I genuinely believe, like we've got an opportunity to to change the world and make people feel at a level that they've never felt and feel free. And so I know what that miserable, dark place looks like. I've spent a lot of my life in moments like that. No one deserves to feel that way, but a lot of people do. And right now, I feel more free, more fulfilled, happier and more like myself than I have in my entire life. Everybody deserves to feel how I'm feeling right now. And so when I started to get the curiosity, I didn't even lean into it. My wife pushed me. And she, along with my other coach, told me what I needed to hear, not what I wanted to hear, and it's not lost on me, the courage it took in my wife to take that leap of faith with me and give me the push knowing it could upset her entire lifestyle. And so that's what I had to honor because my kids are watching, I don't want my kids to see me do what I want my kids to see me do what's right.   Joe: Incredible. I love it, so your podcast, what are there, is there are there three, is that   Brian: You   Joe: Right   Brian: Know what, I actually   Joe: Or.   Brian: Don't even have my own yet,   Joe: Ok.   Brian: I I'm in the process of developing a few. What you've probably seen as I have Bogarts Bullets, which is a regular consistent thing, but and it's going to be repurposed into a podcast. But right now it's just on YouTube and it goes on all my social channels. We have a marriage hack's string that we've started that my wife and I, we've now done we've only done one episode, but we repurpose it into three. And then my content team and strategist's decided that there are a whole lot of thought leaders, influencers, speakers in the world that create intellectual content similar to what I have for years, Bogarts, bullets putting things out, podcasts, other pieces of content to get distributed. And then there's bloggers that are much more niche, but there's nobody that's doing both. And so he's like. If you talk about how you live, you talk about these philosophies, you talk about these guiding principles, these lessons, these things that you do. Why don't we pull the curtain back and show people behind the scenes that that's actually how you operate. And so those are the three things that you've probably found is bogus bullets, the marriage tax and then the No Limits blog. And all three of those, although they're not currently set up as podcasts, one of them will be repurposed that way. And then I'm actually in the process right now. I'll be a co-host on at least two podcasts. We're going to be launching here soon, likely three if this other concept takes off. The podcasting world has kind of changed my world in a lot of ways, in a way I never saw coming. And I've been on over one hundred and fifty other people shows in the last seven, eight months, and it's allowed me to have opportunities to meet people like you. Right. And the connection with Ken Joslyn and Steve Sams. Right. Which both were people that I was on their platforms, on their shows. Like it's allowed me to align myself with incredible individuals on this planet so that we can truly have collective impact. So those are the three shows that currently exist. But they're not podcast currently.   Joe: Got it. OK, so you have things coming up, I know that you're doing the Ken Joslin's   Brian: Yep,   Joe: Boot camp, right?   Brian: Yep, yep, I'm doing his boot camp in April, I've done two of his I've got some other speaking events coming up. And then we've also got a few things launching that I'm really excited about. So we're still doing all of our work with no limits university, which is really like the concepts and the philosophies to help people understand who they are, leading them on intrinsic journey. But we also have another entity in a movement that's called Who before what that's launching as we speak, which is really an attempt to help us change the language and narrative in society about putting more emphasis on what we do versus who we are. And it's not that one or both don't matter. It's that they both matter. But one needs to lead, which is who. And so we're going to change the narrative because it's this whole idea that you go to a networking event. And the first question everybody asks is, what do you do? And even if you asked who you are, like, tell me who you are. Ninety eight percent of people answer with what they do, not who they are.   Joe: So   Brian: Part of the   Joe: True.   Brian: Pain and suffering that exists on this planet, as so many people don't know who they are. And so a lot of the core of the work with everything we do with our coaching and the No Limits university and those things are all about that. But we're actually creating a specific movement to bring into conscious awareness this idea of who needs to be before what.   Joe: I love that is the university and the who before. What are they separate from your actual coaching piece   Brian: They're   Joe: That you   Brian: All   Joe: Do   Brian: There, it's all kind of integrated,   Joe: Ok?   Brian: So, yeah, my my I would say my one to one coaching is the only thing that's kind of outside of that umbrella. It all fits on the same coaching philosophies. But just with the people I work with one to one, it's it's just inherently different than the other structure that we have. But it's the same philosophies, what you'll know about me and a lot of what we do with the no limits you and everything is this idea that we truly have the ability, if we are aware enough and influential enough to build a life of alignment that can become self-regulating. So for me, I'm very clear on who I am. I'm very clear on where I'm headed. I'm very clear on the impact I want to have, as well as the hierarchy of importance in my life. Family being first. Right. After that, because I'm so clear, everything I do is in alignment with where I'm headed. So when you ask the question, are they all, yeah, they're integrated because they're all holistically apart and in alignment of where we're going to impact a billion lives. How those are translated look a little bit different. But they are all towards the same intent, which is to impact a billion lives.   Joe: So it's the YouTube channel, it's eventually some podcasts on their way. It's but no limits university. There's the Who before what portion of that? There's the coaching, which is one on one with you. Correct. Speaking engagements. When when? I mean, obviously, you still do it virtually, but you're actually going to be live at that bootcamp coming   Brian: Yep,   Joe: Up in   Brian: Yep.   Joe: April. So as that opens up again, I mean, when I watched you on the Growth Now summit, which I attended, your portion of, it was brilliant. I   Brian: Oh,   Joe: You   Brian: Thank   Joe: Know, I   Brian: You.   Joe: Just said, I mean, you're an amazing speaker.   Brian: Thank you.   Joe: You're just not talking to us. But you bring people in to the story.   Brian: Thank   Joe: And   Brian: You.   Joe: I just   Brian: Thank   Joe: Sat   Brian: You.   Joe: There and I was like, oh, this is unbelievable. Like, I would have paid thousands of dollars to   Brian: Thank   Joe: Watch.   Brian: You.   Joe: So it   Brian: Thank   Joe: Was amazing.   Brian: You.   Joe: Did I miss somewhere on your website? Because it's just so much on there. I can't figure out.   Brian: No,   Joe: But   Brian: You   Joe: Is   Brian: Didn't miss you didn't   Joe: It.   Brian: Miss anything. There's going to be new sections actually built on the website, Zoom. Let's put it this way. You listed a lo

In the final installment of our series on forms, the Angular Show welcomes one of our favorite speakers and expert on forms, our very own panelist, Jennifer Wadella. Jennifer is the Director of Angular Development at Bitovi, a front-end JavaScript consulting firm.In the first two installments, we discussed Angular Formly with Bram (better known as Beeman) and Juri Strumpflohner, and then we sat down with Ward Bell to expand our understanding and appreciation for template-driven forms. In this episode, Jennifer will take your knowledge of reactive-driven forms to the next level. To get started, we will broadly discuss the basics of reactive forms and its API; including the AbstractControl, the FormBuilder, and more. We'll then briefly learn about the differences between using the reactive forms API and the template-driven approach. We'll also discuss some more advanced topics, such as the value control accessor and validation. Finally, we'll look at a few of the open issues related to reactive forms and discuss how the API could be improved (ehh hemm, typings).If you haven't subscribed to our show, go ahead and do it now. We love this community and we want you to be a part of it! The Angular Show is your home for the latest Angular news, to learn more about Angular, and to meet amazing people in the community.Show Notes: ngx-typed-forms: https://github.com/Quramy/ngx-typed-formsStrong typings: https://github.com/angular/angular/issues/13721Andrew's reply: https://github.com/angular/angular/pull/40772#issuecomment-776456955 Improvements: https://github.com/angular/angular/issues/31963Control touch state observable: https://github.com/angular/angular/issues/10887Control.getValidators() is missing: https://github.com/angular/angular/issues/13461Input as Observable: https://github.com/angular/angular/issues/5689Identity made simple for developers with Auth0 - https://a0.to/youtubeDemo: How to add user login to an Angular application using Auth0 - https://a0.to/angularSDKqsConnect with us:Brian Love - @brian_loveJennifer Wadella - @likeOMGitsFEDAYAaron Frost - @aaronfrost

In this episode of the Farm Walks Podcast, we dive into direct-to-consumer marketing with Emily Tzeng of Local Color Farm and Fiber in Puyallup, WA. We talk about developing marketing channels, building a brand, and the ways she adapted her CSA and farmers market approach during COVID. We then chat with Matt Kelly, Executive Director of the Queen Anne Farmers Market about farmers market operations during COVID and what's in store for the 2021 season. Local Color Farm and Fiber is owned and operated by Emily Tzeng and Brian Love. They live and farm in the Puyallup River Valley, growing vegetables, heritage breed lamb, and natural dyes. They focus on growing heritage Asian veggies and raise sheep for both wool and meat. Most of their produce is marketed towards their CSA program and at the Queen Anne Farmers Market in Seattle. Their naturally dyed yarn line utilizes their own farm yarn as well as fiber from other Western farms and ranches and is all processed at small mills in the US. They believe in the synergy between plants and animals; they provide fertility for their produce and flowers using compost generated by their animals, extensive cover cropping, and organic fertilizer. Their sheep are rotated throughout their pastures and cover crops for the health of the land and the animals. Their flower field and natural dye plants provide lots of food and habitat for beneficial insects. They are proud to be a small farm, allowing them to touch each step of the process.This episode was supported in part by the U.S. Department of Agriculture Agricultural Marketing Service's Farmers Market Promotion Program.