Podcasts about idealization

******Support the channel******Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thedissenterPayPal: paypal.me/thedissenterPayPal Subscription 1 Dollar: https://tinyurl.com/yb3acuuyPayPal Subscription 3 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/ybn6bg9lPayPal Subscription 5 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/ycmr9gpzPayPal Subscription 10 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/y9r3fc9mPayPal Subscription 20 Dollars: https://tinyurl.com/y95uvkao ******Follow me on******Website: https://www.thedissenter.net/The Dissenter Goodreads list: https://shorturl.at/7BMoBFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/thedissenteryt/Twitter: https://x.com/TheDissenterYT This show is sponsored by Enlites, Learning & Development done differently. Check the website here: http://enlites.com/ Dr. Angela Potochnik is Professor of Philosophy and Director of the Center for Public Engagement with Science at the University of Cincinnati.​ Her research addresses the nature of science and its successes, the relationships between science and the public, and methods in science, especially population biology. She is the author of Idealization and the Aims of Science, and coauthor of Recipes for Science: An Introduction to Scientific Methods and Reasoning. In this episode, we focus on Recipes for Science. We start by discussing why we should care about science, the limits of science, the demarcation problem, whether there is one single scientific method, and hypotheses and theories. We also talk about experimentation and non-experimental methods, scientific modeling, scientific reasoning, statistics and probability, correlation and causation, explanation in science, and scientific breakthroughs. Finally, we talk about how the social and historical context influences science, and we discuss whether science can ever be value-free.--A HUGE THANK YOU TO MY PATRONS/SUPPORTERS: PER HELGE LARSEN, JERRY MULLER, BERNARDO SEIXAS, ADAM KESSEL, MATTHEW WHITINGBIRD, ARNAUD WOLFF, TIM HOLLOSY, HENRIK AHLENIUS, FILIP FORS CONNOLLY, ROBERT WINDHAGER, RUI INACIO, ZOOP, MARCO NEVES, COLIN HOLBROOK, PHIL KAVANAGH, SAMUEL ANDREEFF, FRANCIS FORDE, TIAGO NUNES, FERGAL CUSSEN, HAL HERZOG, NUNO MACHADO, JONATHAN LEIBRANT, JOÃO LINHARES, STANTON T, SAMUEL CORREA, ERIK HAINES, MARK SMITH, JOÃO EIRA, TOM HUMMEL, SARDUS FRANCE, DAVID SLOAN WILSON, YACILA DEZA-ARAUJO, ROMAIN ROCH, DIEGO LONDOÑO CORREA, YANICK PUNTER, CHARLOTTE BLEASE, NICOLE BARBARO, ADAM HUNT, PAWEL OSTASZEWSKI, NELLEKE BAK, GUY MADISON, GARY G HELLMANN, SAIMA AFZAL, ADRIAN JAEGGI, PAULO TOLENTINO, JOÃO BARBOSA, JULIAN PRICE, HEDIN BRØNNER, DOUGLAS FRY, FRANCA BORTOLOTTI, GABRIEL PONS CORTÈS, URSULA LITZCKE, SCOTT, ZACHARY FISH, TIM DUFFY, SUNNY SMITH, JON WISMAN, WILLIAM BUCKNER, PAUL-GEORGE ARNAUD, LUKE GLOWACKI, GEORGIOS THEOPHANOUS, CHRIS WILLIAMSON, PETER WOLOSZYN, DAVID WILLIAMS, DIOGO COSTA, ALEX CHAU, AMAURI MARTÍNEZ, CORALIE CHEVALLIER, BANGALORE ATHEISTS, LARRY D. LEE JR., OLD HERRINGBONE, MICHAEL BAILEY, DAN SPERBER, ROBERT GRESSIS, JEFF MCMAHAN, JAKE ZUEHL, BARNABAS RADICS, MARK CAMPBELL, TOMAS DAUBNER, LUKE NISSEN, KIMBERLY JOHNSON, JESSICA NOWICKI, LINDA BRANDIN, GEORGE CHORIATIS, VALENTIN STEINMANN, ALEXANDER HUBBARD, BR, JONAS HERTNER, URSULA GOODENOUGH, DAVID PINSOF, SEAN NELSON, MIKE LAVIGNE, JOS KNECHT, LUCY, MANVIR SINGH, PETRA WEIMANN, CAROLA FEEST, MAURO JÚNIOR, 航 豊川, TONY BARRETT, NIKOLAI VISHNEVSKY, STEVEN GANGESTAD, TED FARRIS, ROBINROSWELL, AND KEITH RICHARDSON!A SPECIAL THANKS TO MY PRODUCERS, YZAR WEHBE, JIM FRANK, ŁUKASZ STAFINIAK, TOM VANEGDOM, BERNARD HUGUENEY, CURTIS DIXON, BENEDIKT MUELLER, THOMAS TRUMBLE, KATHRINE AND PATRICK TOBIN, JONCARLO MONTENEGRO, NICK GOLDEN, CHRISTINE GLASS, IGOR NIKIFOROVSKI, AND PER KRAULIS!AND TO MY EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS, MATTHEW LAVENDER, SERGIU CODREANU, ROSEY, AND GREGORY HASTINGS!

This week, we're exploring a concept that is fundamental yet often overlooked in our daily interactions— the Social Contract. This idea, though abstract, plays a crucial role in understanding the dynamics of toxic leadership and the subtle ways it can manifest in organizations.”In the gray areas of unwritten social contracts, toxic leaders find their playground—where chaos breeds control and logic is left in the dust."To join our Inclusion Community Call click here:https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/uT7bMKbgQgG43rej_IC3xgThank you for being a part of our community. Let's continue to learn and grow together.If you haven't already, check out the podcast episode on Idealization, Devalue, and Discard for more insights into toxic behavior patterns.https://open.spotify.com/episode/3mGrIbWWXLaVt6Y2814raW?si=Rr1CGOKGQTWtjT6odKCV0AUnderstanding these dynamics is essential for fostering inclusive and healthy work environments. If you have questions or thoughts, feel free to share them in the comments. Let's continue this important conversation together!

Theodore Morley wonders why tech workers so frequently point our wanderlust toward hands-on trades, Eduardo Bouças explains why he's lost confidence in Vercel's handling of Next.js, "xan" is a command line tool that can be used to process CSV files directly from the shell, Pawel Brodzinski takes us back to Kanban's roots & Sergey Tselovalnikov weighs in on vibe coding.

Theodore Morley wonders why tech workers so frequently point our wanderlust toward hands-on trades, Eduardo Bouças explains why he's lost confidence in Vercel's handling of Next.js, "xan" is a command line tool that can be used to process CSV files directly from the shell, Pawel Brodzinski takes us back to Kanban's roots & Sergey Tselovalnikov weighs in on vibe coding.

Theodore Morley wonders why tech workers so frequently point our wanderlust toward hands-on trades, Eduardo Bouças explains why he's lost confidence in Vercel's handling of Next.js, "xan" is a command line tool that can be used to process CSV files directly from the shell, Pawel Brodzinski takes us back to Kanban's roots & Sergey Tselovalnikov weighs in on vibe coding.

BPD Idealization Phase Causes Fantasy BondingBPD idealization in the beginning of a significant other relationshipcreates a fantasy bond. People with BPD, not having any stable senseof self, are intense and want (often) immediate "relationship on". Afterthe person with BPD splits you to a major devaluation, you will not everbe able to be re-idealized.People with Codependency (often unaware of this) are very emotionally hungry - needing validation and reassurance (from childhood woundedness)feel fantastic, your feelings in the BPD idealization phase increase your senseof self-worth and self-esteem until the ruptured splits of BPD devaluation starthappening.If you are ghosted and/or discarded you've lost yourself so much to focusingintensely on the person with BPD, trying, in vain, to get back to that beginningand how great everything felt. Codependents after a BPD Breakup find it feelsnext to impossible to not get that idealizing person with BPD back to re-capturethe elusive - not ever going to happen again - idealization phase and who youthought the person with BPD was.https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Bloghttps://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcasts & Bloghttps://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & moreThis podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Unlock the mystery of dating an INFP! Whether you're an INFP or dating one, this guide reveals the unique patterns and challenges in INFP relationships. FREE RESOURCE: Get your 5-Day INFP Soul Journey Course: → inowfeelpositive.com⭐ KEY TOPICS COVERED:Understanding INFP idealization in relationshipsDealing with passive-aggressive tendenciesNavigating INFP's relationship with clutterImproving communication with your INFP partnerReal-life examples and practical solutions00:00 Introduction to INFP Dating Challenges00:47 Idealization in Relationships03:19 Passive Aggressive Behaviors06:56 Clutter and Mental State10:48 Expressing Desires Directly13:05 Conclusion and Next Steps RESOURCES: I Now Feel Positive Masterclass for INFPs: http://infp.geekpsychology.com Path of Heroes Academy: http://poha.geekpsychology.com Self-Development with AI Course: http://selfdevelopmentwithai.com 1-on-1 Coaching: http://coaching.geekpsychology.com CONNECT WITH ME:  Instagram:  / geekpsychology   Twitter:  / geekpsychology   YouTube:  / geekpsychology  ️ Podcast: http://podcast.geekpsychology.com  Facebook:  / geekpsychology  #INFP #PersonalityTypes #Relationships #Dating #MBTI #PersonalGrowth

Have you ever felt like the rug was ripped right out from under you at work? Things were going well, really well…then boom you are left on the curb blindsided and dismayed. Hero to zero? It's possible it may have just been bad luck, or it may have been a part of a toxic workplace pattern.  In this People Impact Podcast episode, Ann Betz and Lisa Dempsey  into the complexities of workplace toxicity and the insidious IDD cycle: Idealization, Devaluing, and Discard.  Understanding these patterns is crucial for anyone looking to unmask workplace toxicity and ultimately foster a healthier and more effective work environment. Inside this episode: Unmasking Toxicity: We explore the IDD cycle—Idealization, Devaluing, and Discard—and how these patterns manifest in organizational settings. Red Flags to Watch For: From unrealistic expectations to the sudden loss of influence, we highlighted key signs that may indicate toxicity in your workplace. The Importance of Perspective: Seeking outside opinions when navigating workplace challenges. Sometimes, being in the thick of it can cloud our judgment. Meaningful Actions : Avoid jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Be cautious of entering a new job "hungry" for validation; it can lead to poor decisions. Stay grounded and recognize the signs of devaluation and discard, which can be subtle yet impactful. Vote with Your Feet. If a workplace consistently exhibits toxic behaviors, remember that you have the power to make a change. Sometimes, the best option is to seek a healthier environment where you can thrive. Remember, you deserve a workplace that values your contributions and fosters your growth. More about People Impact: Lisa Dempsey – ⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisakdempsey/⁠⁠ - ⁠⁠https://www.leadershiplabs.eu⁠⁠ Ann Betz –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ann-betz-a6b31018/  https://www.beaboveleadership.com Reach us at ⁠⁠PeopleImpactPodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠

What do authoritarian followers, religious fundamentalists, and domestic violence perpetrators have in common? Idealization of a dual father image that alternates between violent and loving. Why is this? Chalquist.com

Borderlines Just Aren't That In To You & The Emptiness of BPD IdealizationBorderlines just aren't that in to you, Codependents. The incredible emptiness of BPD idealization takes a long time to understand because it felt so great and felt and was too good to be true. BPD idealization just as BPD devaluation isn't about YOU. It's about who you represent unconsciously to un-treated person with Borderline Personality Disorder. You think you can do better, give more, understand more and do it differently and that it will make a difference - Nope! Codependents also often believe that they are so to blame for why people with BPD act out, act in, punish, as you walk on the impossible egg-shells. No matter what you, as a Codependent try to do differently, promise, change, fix and so on  - NONE OF IT will work because you are insignificant (for who you really are) to the Borderline.For the Borderline, it's all about the Borderline. You are just the "object other" that they blame. They don't actually ever get to know who you really are as you lose yourself more and more to their lost selves as they seek to use (unconsciously often) to just survive. There's no excuse for what they do to you in their attempts (all about them) to just survive, seeking identity through you but not ever seeking to truly KNOW you!https://ajmahari.ca/sessions

Let's Think About "Suicidal Idealization." So many people from all around the world are suffering with Suicidal Idealization. And when Gina comes onto my show to share how she sees suicide and how she hopes to help people from crossing that line of no return. I even had a moment during our conversation that broke me a bit. But it also reminds us how real this affects so many lives. 

BPD NPD Who is The Person Behind The Idealization & Love Bombing?So many people who have been in a relationship with someone with Borderline Personality Disorder or BPD with Co-Morbid Narcissistic Personality Disorder are caught in a trauma bond ruminating and trying to figure out who is the person behind the idealization and love bombing when there isn't a "real person" inside at all, only a false self. The intermittent reinforcement within the trauma bond with someone with BPD or BPD/NPD keeps Codependents stuck in circles of (often misinformation) trying to give their own explanations oroffer up erroneous ones or misinterpretations taken from perhaps listening to or reading too many contradictory sources online.The person you fell in love with doesn't exist. The person behind the idealization and the love bombing is the false self that protects the lost self in Borderlines and Narcissists.https://ajmahari.ca/sessions

Jerry Scarlato is an Entrepreneur, Personal Development Coach, Author, Speaker & Podcaster. Jerry helps people find health and fitness, as well as being more focused and intentional in a world of distractions and shortcuts. He advises groups and individuals maximize their performances by developing a better mindset.  0.00:    Jerry Background as a gym owner and “building community” 7.20:     Overcoming a “low frustration tolerance” 13.00:   Transitions and single after a decade long marriage 17.00:   Idealization in relationships 26.00:   Importance of real assets in today's inflationary market 34.00:   Wisdom from reading older books (principles remain) 38.45:   Stoicism written 2,000 years ago, influencing entrepreneurs today 44.00:   Being in the moment and having boundaries with cell phones 53.00:   Building self confidence by focusing on tasks (rather than goals); Process not product 1.02.00: Being intentional with time and being a man of your word Connect with Jerry Scarlato: www.instagram.com/jerryscarlatowww.youtube.com/@jerryscarlato Until next time, love and good vibes.  Podcast Website: https://enterthelionheart.com/ Check out the latest episode here: Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enter-the-lionheart/id1554904704 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4tD7VvMUvnOgChoNYShbcI

How do digital interactions, specifically through gaming, form genuine friendships? Nicholas Baima challenges the traditional notion that physical presence is essential for true friendship. By examining ancient ethical theories, especially Aristotle's various forms of friendship, the episode debates whether online friendships can reach the purest form of friendship.  The conversation also addresses potential drawbacks, such as gaming culture's sometimes toxic behavior and the unique opportunities gaming affords for connecting people from diverse backgrounds. Link to Nicholas Baima's book: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Its-OK-Be-Gamer/dp/1032312130  [00:00] Introduction to the Series and Guest [00:20] Thought Experiment: Friendship in Gaming [01:23] Debating the Nature of Virtual Friendships [02:50] Philosophical Perspectives on Friendship [04:30] Gaming and Ethical Theories [11:53] Gaming as a Shared Adventure [14:19] Idealization and Authenticity in Online Friendships [24:59] The Depth of Gaming Friendships [26:01] Aristotelian Friendship and Gaming [27:12] Challenges of Maintaining Gaming Friendships [28:28] The Social Dynamics of Online Gaming [29:44] Toxicity and Anonymity in Online Gaming [32:46] Game Design and Social Interactions [35:14] Gender and Gaming Communities [37:48] Gaming as Character Development [44:03] The Value of Gaming Activities [45:47] AI and the Illusion of Friendship [48:09] Emotional Connections with Non-Playable Characters [49:43] Concluding Thoughts on Friendship and Gaming --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/braininavat/message

Today I welcome the esteemed Dr. Joseph Burgo to discuss the psychological crisis of males who find refuge in a trans identity. Along the way, we explore myriad contributing factors, from shame, narcissism, and autogynephilia; to rising rates of autism and unlimited access to increasingly obscene internet pornography; as well as gender roles, norms, expectations, and recent cultural shifts.As we unravel the narratives of ex-military men and individuals in positions of power who transition, we uncover the complexities of idealization and devaluation in trans identification and the numerous parallels with personality disorder traits. How do societal norms and social justice narratives fuel the shallow idealization of the opposite gender?We also touch on the challenges detransitioners face in therapy and the obstacles therapists encounter in providing effective care for individuals with gender ideation. How can therapists navigate the tense climate surrounding gender identity exploration? And what role should exploration of fantasies and projections play in understanding the complexities of gender distress? Joseph Burgo, Ph.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist and graduate psychoanalyst who has been practicing for more than 40 years. As a writer, he's the author of several works of non-fiction bringing his insights and experience as a therapist to a popular audience, and his articles and commentary on the topics of shame and narcissism have appeared in the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Wall Street Journal, and most of the large news outlets online. In his private practice, he currently focuses on gender distress, and works with trans-identified adolescent boys, male detransitioners, and men who struggle with autogynephilia. He can be reached at joeburgo@gmail.com; find him on X @jburgo55; visit his website at AfterPsychotherapy.com; or view him in the documentary film of another former guest, Jennifer Lahl (from episodes 52 and 97), The Lost Boys: Searching for Manhood.Dr. Burgo's books:The Narcissist You Know: Defending Yourself Against Extreme Narcissists in an All-About-Me AgeWhy Do I Do That?: Psychological Defense Mechanisms and the Hidden Ways They Shape Our LivesShame: Free Yourself, Find Joy, and Build True Self-EsteemAll books mentioned on this podcast and written by my guests can be found at sometherapist.com/bookshop or by following the Amazon affiliate links. Thank you for purchases that support the show.00:00 Start[00:02:49] Autism diagnosis evolution.[00:06:36] Psychology in developmental framework.[00:08:02] Rise in autism due to screens.[00:11:55] Shame and narcissism in youth.[00:18:45] Shame defiance.[00:21:03] Adolescence and privacy for development.[00:25:37] Exploring views on pornography.[00:29:36] Effects of intense porn consumption.[00:32:55] Autogynephilia as narcissism and desire.[00:37:40] Ex-military men and transgender identity.[00:40:58] Grass is greener syndrome.[00:46:03] Idealization and devaluation in identity.[00:49:50] The impact of societal beliefs.[00:52:17] Avoiding adult responsibilities.[00:56:20] Emancipating children's decision-making.[01:01:27] Detransitioning experiences.[01:02:43] Detransitioning experiences and insights.[01:08:15] Importance of finding healing relationships.[01:10:15] Lack of ICD procedure codes for detransition.[01:13:42] Self-care reminder.TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission.  To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!Learn more about Do No Harm.Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask qu...

On this episode of the Awayken Space podcast I explore seeing everyone for who they are without idealization.

Today, we're diving deep into the murky waters of divorcing a narcissist, a topic that strikes a chord with many of our listeners. We're joined by Stephany Ann, an attorney and international best-selling author whose own journey from adversity to advocacy serves as a beacon of hope for countless survivors of domestic violence and emotional trauma. With a heart for healing and a commitment to empowerment, Stephany shares her profound insights into the complexities of narcissism, marriage to a narcissist, and the arduous journey of co-parenting with grace and resilience in these situations. Through candid anecdotes, expert analysis, and heartfelt reflection, Stephany invites us to peer behind the veil of illusion and confront the harsh realities of being in a relationship with a narcissistic partner. In this episode, we discuss: •  The reality of being married to a narcissist •  A glimpse into Stephany's two marriages to narcissists •  The impact of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) on relationships •  How a narcissistic parent impacts children •  Signs to help you spot narcissistic behavior •  Red flags you should never ignore •  The exhausting process of divorcing a narcissist •  The narcissistic abuse cycle: Idealization, devaluation, rejection •  Why is it so hard to leave a narcissist? •  Gaslighting: A hidden form of emotional abuse •   Invaluable advice for those navigating similar challenges •  What Stephany would have done differently •  The importance of self-reflection before entering new relationships •  The transformative power of emotional freedom To connect with Stephany Ann, email her at stephanyannspeaks@gmail.com Stay tuned for more empowering conversations!

Helping people admit what they feel in order to heal from the effects of narcissism from a Biblical and Psychological perspective. Website: www.NarcAbuseNoMore.org Email: NarcAbuseNoMore@mail.com Donate via PayPal: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=F37STVQCNJ9D8 CASH APP - $evangelistklrch1975 IT Iz FINISHED End Times' Ministries Website: www.ITIzFINISHED.com IT Iz FINISHED Email: ITIzFINISHED@mail.com Watch on YouTube at: https://www.youtube.com/@NarcAbuseNoMore Watch on Rumble… https://rumble.com/c/c-1334751 Watch on Brighteon…  www.brighteon.com/channels/narcissisticabusenomore Telegram: https://t.me/itizfinished

If you're interested in learning more about how to spot warning signs of manipulation then click here to sign up for information on my upcoming empowerment workshop. In this workshop, I'll be covering what the sneaky signs of manipulation look like, tricks on how to spot manipulative people early on, and how to protect yourself and your peace!Originally I planned to make this recording a 2 part series but as I sat down to finish edits, I decided it was best to go for a 3 part series on this one. There are so many details and parts of Tava's share that deserve to be processed and understood. Her story very clearly displays a classic example of what the cycle of narcissistic abuse looks like. Phase 1- Idealization. Phase 2- Devaluation. Phase 3- Discard.In part 1 from last week, Tava describes the love bombing, false self, future faking, and data mining that her ex displays which is what happens during the idealization stage. Last week you also started to see signs of devaluation which include blame shifting, emotional neglect, and gaslighting. These manipulation tactics carry over into this week's episode part 2. All classic textbook narcissistic manipulation tactics. Your Host,KrisxxClick here to book your FREE 45-min consultation with meSign up here for my upcoming Empowerment WorkshopGet your tickets here to Vixen Valentines happening on Feb 10th!Check out my FREE RESOURCE LIBRARY Let's be friends on Instagram @KrisZervas and TikTok @kriszervas

Get on the waitlist for Justina's next program: https://coachjustina.myflodesk.com/weeklylettersofhope Have a question you'd like Justina to answer on the show? Email her at hello@justinabutler.com Summary Idealizing partners and lack of accountability. 0:00 Idealizing partners and enabling harmful behavior. 3:20 Idealizing others and its impact on self-worth. 6:53 Idealization in relationships and healing emotional wounds. 13:01 Self-care and setting boundaries in relationships. 17:42 --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/goodgirlfreewomanjustina/message

What happens when spend too much time trying to "escape" from your life? First off, it is completely understandable to want to escape from your life at times. This world isn't setup in a way that fits everyone - every personality and persona. But there are some costs that come with doing this too frequently and for extended periods of time. I want you to know the costs, as well as, some other ways to manage this reality. Get my book: For When Everything is Burning https://bit.ly/forwheneverythingisburning Connect with me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.scott.eilers See the Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@DrScottEilers What's Inside: 0:00 – Introduction 5:00 – Cost 1: Idealization of Crafted Realities 8:03 – Cost 2: Impact on Social Skills and Relationships 13:26 – Cost 3: Misallocation of Resources and Time 16:45 – Cost 5: Diminished Cognitive Performance and Attention 19:25 – Cost 6: Imagination and Disconnection from Reality 22:25 – Cost 7: Escapism and its Impact on Real-World Experience 25:55 – Summary: Understanding the 7 Costs of Excessive Fantasy EngagementDisclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client. But I do care. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/scott-eilers/support

Dr. Stephanie Sarkis is a psychotherapist with over 20 years of experience specializing in ADHD, anxiety, & narcissistic abuse. She is a bestselling author and an American Mental Health Counselors Association Diplomate and Clinical Mental Health Specialist in Child and Adolescent Counseling – one of only 20 in the U.S. She is a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family and Circuit Civil Mediator. Dr. Sarkis is also a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and a National Certified Counselor. She is a senior contributor to Forbes, and is also a contributor to Psychology Today. Dr. Sarkis has a PhD, EdS, and MEd in Mental Health Counseling from the University of Florida. She maintains a private practice in Tampa, Florida, where she provides telehealth sessions and facilitates collaborative divorce. Dr. Sarkis received an Outstanding Dissertation Award from the American Psychological Association for her research on comorbid ADHD and the executive functions of the brain in a pediatric population. In this episode, Dr. Sarkis and I discuss what can make up toxic relationships, including topics like emotional abuse, gaslighting, and trauma bonding. We take a look at additional topics including the cycle of idealization, devaluing, and discard; love bombing, recognizing red flags, insecure attachment styles, the sunk cost fallacy, and challenges in leaving toxic relationships. We also addresses what it can look like to move on, seeking support through counseling, self-care, volunteering, therapy for family of origin issues, codependency, cultural differences, caretaking for abusive parents, and the importance of processing emotions, concluding with a message of hope for those who have experienced toxic relationships. Takeaways The cycle of idealization, devaluing, and discard is common in toxic relationships. Love bombing and grand gestures can be signs of manipulation and control. Individuals with insecure attachment styles may be more vulnerable to toxic relationships. Leaving toxic relationships can be challenging due to the sunk cost fallacy. Seek support services, such as counseling, after ending a toxic relationship. Practice self-care and prioritize your health and well-being. Consider volunteering as a means of healing and reconnecting with the community. Therapy can be instrumental in healing and addressing family of origin issues. Understand the concept of codependency and its cultural implications. Allow yourself to feel and process emotions as part of the healing process. Remember that there is hope for healing and building healthy relationships. Chapters 02:58 Dr. Sarkis' Background and Specialization in Toxic Relationships 04:13 Emotional Abuse and Trauma Bonding 05:21 Cycle of Idealization, Devaluing, and Discard 06:27 Love Bombing and Grand Gestures 07:14 Gaslighting and Manipulation 08:06 Financial and Economic Abuse 09:14 Trauma Bonding and Dopamine Boosts 10:07 Honeymoon Phase and Love Bombing 11:01 Discard Phase and Hoovering 12:16 Lack of Personal Accountability 13:48 No Contact or Low Contact 14:47 Differentiating Love Bombing from Romantic Gestures 15:12 Red Flags in Relationships 22:52 Treating Wait Staff and Family 23:43 Splitting and Comparisons 25:05 Intermittent Reinforcement and Healthy Relationships 27:02 Isolation and Threats 31:17 Insecure Attachment Styles and Leaving Toxic Relationships 32:06 Sunk Cost Fallacy 32:11 Moving on from a Toxic Relationship 33:37 Practical Steps After Ending a Toxic Relationship 36:37 Volunteering as a Means of Healing 37:43 The Role of Therapy in Healing 38:21 Taking a Break from Dating 40:24 The Importance of Self-Care and Sleep 41:16 Reconnecting with Healthy Relationships 42:33 Understanding Codependency 44:12 Considering the Perpetrator's Behavior 46:00 The Influence of Culture on Codependency 50:20 The Dilemma of Caretaking for Abusive Parents 52:06 The Importance of Feeling and Processing Emotions 53:30 Words of Wisdom: There is Hope

Incredibly captivating episode for listening, contemplating, and self-analysis. Meditation is the key to immersing yourself in the experience that Angela will guide you through. Truly a remarkable journey to explore and understand oneself Our host shares a deep love for prayer and delves into its definition, revealing it as a trigger word synonymous with communion and union. Tune in as we uncover the profound healing nature of all prayers, regardless of their intent. We keep going into the Idealization concept, and a crucial insight emerges: never place anything before God. God signifies presence, an incredible power felt in the here and now. Learn to release attachments to what should or shouldn't be; a perpetual quest that often leaves us unsatisfied. Avoid idealization by adopting a childlike perspective, opening the door to the kingdom of God. We come to understand that within love, there exists an order, a divine order. Our troubles and problems, in some inexplicable way, are perfectly orchestrated. To fully embrace this divine order, we're encouraged to rest mentally and emotionally in God, interpreted as resting in faith. Faith, allows us to let what is naturally arise. Join us as we explore the art of resting in faith, surrendering to the divine presence, and immersing ourselves in the mysteries that unfold. We invite you to become a part of our community: subscribe to our website at https://angelamontano.com/ to receive your zoom link for the live call and to stay updated on our latest episodes. Your feedback and topic suggestions on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or via email at admin@angelamontano.com are highly valued, as we're dedicated to crafting meaningful and resonant content.

BPD Idealization to Devaluation To Rumination & Ruination Get Off The BPD RollercoasterBPD idealization is the beginning of the intense fast-paced relationship and it is also unconsciously for both the Borderline and the person dating or in love with this person, the start of the ending of all you believe you have found and can continue to build on. People in these relationships with (untreated) Borderlines go from idealization, shockingly, to devaluation on to be ghosted, discarded, or you breakup with the Borderline and then rumination is overwhelming and if not treated people with Codependency are the brink of emotional and/or physical, and sometimes also, financial ruination. You need to get off the BPD rollercoaster before you really can't recognize or know yourself emotionally at all anymore.Sessions with A.J. Mahari - https://ajmahari.ca/sessions

BPD Idealization Devaluation Cycles - "Get-Away Closer" BPD Push/PullBPD idealization is not as real as BPD devaluation. Both result from the core relational impairment of the Approach Avoidance Conflict in BPD - It's the push-pull "get-away closer" that cannot and will not ever change until and unless each person with BPD has 8-16 years of successful treatment.Without that treatment Borderlines have no hope of learning object constancy and object permanence. Borderline Approach/Avoid (push/pull) is the absence of object constancy. This relational deficit in people with BPD is at the very core of what makes relating to them impossible and oh, so, painful that you can lose yourself in the process.Sessions with A.J. Mahari - https://ajmahari.ca/sessions

If you have just woken up from the situation you find yourself in, a victim of narcissistic abuse, you are not alone in your fury. Being a victim of this insidious crime is a reason to feel anger and it's completely justified. You were wronged on so many levels. Your boundaries were crossed recklessly. Today in this episode we are going to talk about that anger. We are going to talk about the sources of it as it relates to narcissistic abuse. Support the showThank you for listening! Stay connected with us here: https://linktr.ee/lynnnicholsEnjoying the Show? Show your Support and Buy Lynn a coffee here. Monthly Subscriptions Now Available: Learn More Here

This episode has been published and can be heard everywhere your podcast is available. Book a One on One coaching session here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.rawmotivations.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Home of the NARC App (Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Community) Want to help support this podcast? https://anchor.fm/rawmotivations/support Listen to the wife's perspective on our new podcast Trauma, Drama & Life: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/trauma-drama-life/id1639753152⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.rawmotivations.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Tune in to hear the perspective of a self aware narcissist. That's me - Ben Taylor a a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth and change. I do that by these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram and Facebook.   Also I try to help people with or abused by narcissism. Please reach out to me if you are a:  Victim of Narcissistic Abuse -Helping provide closure, reduce guilt and break free from the trauma bond that toxic people imprison you in.   Narcissist -I understand you better than you probably understand yourself because I have been there, I am there and I am fighting daily for a better life. You can do that too. If you are interested in talking with me one on one grab a time with the link below. www.calendly.com/rawmotivations From Fantasy to Reality: A Journal for after the Toxic Relationship Grab yours ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Platforms I am on: TikTok (71k followers) -  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@raw_motivations⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram -  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/rawmotivations⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook -  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/Raw-Motivations-105074738842639/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Linkedin - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/rawmotivations/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Rumble - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://rumble.com/c/c-2492510⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ YouTube - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaXWggxVnUIVASBdc7GtSNw --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/rawmotivations/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/rawmotivations/support

This episode discusses the 3 phases of the narcissistic abuse cycle in depth. The psychological effects of being idealized by a partner suffering from NPD. The lasting self blame patterns we develop following idealization are explained.

if you know it doesn't have to be this way, why settle?

“A child [patient] makes a mistake, upsets things - one doesn't console or complain, but just reflects whatever the patient's affect was at that moment, such as, ‘that seems to bother you' or ‘it's hard to put those two pieces together'- to just observe it, to not have an affective response of disgust or irritation. The same thing is true if a patient comes in bragging or talking about something that made them very proud - to acknowledge their being proud but to not get all excited. The kind of things that often these children who have a lot of difficulty due to parents' narcissistic investment in them, and we're all narcissistically invested in our kids - they have a lot of trouble knowing what they really feel and what they really want. I think my non-judgmental, either positively judgmental or negatively judgmental attitude, allows them to begin to experience that what they're doing is what they are doing for themselves for some reason, not what they're doing for me or for the witness, that's an enormously important part.”      Episode Description: We begin with Judy sharing her professional journey that led her to child analysis. She is active as a psychoanalytic clinician, supervisor, teacher, consultant, writer, and editor. We discuss four key papers of hers that study neutrality, enactments, informative experiences, and the role of attachment. Central to her writing and thinking is her curiosity about the inner lives of her patients, especially as action and interaction provide clues to that latent life. We discuss the analyst's experience of ‘wearing the attributes' that patients need to project onto us and tolerating the often deep discomfort in doing so. We consider how her model of therapeutic action, entailing surprise and changes in perceptual frame, does and doesn't have some similarities to psychedelic-assisted therapy. We close with her sharing her analytic experiences with gender-conflicted boys and her hope for the future of our field.     Our Guest: Judith Fingert Chused, MD, is an Emeritus Training and Supervising Psychoanalyst at the Washington Baltimore Center for Psychoanalysis and Supervising Psychoanalyst at the Denver, Cleveland, and Seattle Institutes.  She is also a Clinical Professor of Behavioral Sciences and of Pediatrics at the George Washington School of Medicine. She is married for 57 years to a former nursery school and medical school classmate and has seven delightful, mischievous grandchildren.      Recommended Readings:  Chused, J. F. (2016) An Analyst's Uncertainty and Fear. Psychoanalytic Quarterly 85:835-850     Chused, J. F. (2000) Discussion: A Clinician's View of Attachment Theory. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 48:1175-1187     Chused, J. F. (1999) Male Gender Identity and Sexual Behaviour. International Journal of Psychoanalysis 80:1105-1117     Chused, J. F. (1996) The Patient's Perception of the Analyst's Countertransference. Canadian Journal of Psychoanalysis 4:231-253     Chused, J. F. (1996) The Therapeutic Action of Psychoanalysis: Abstinence and Informative Experiences. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 44:1047-1071    Chused, J. F. (1991) The Evocative Power of Enactments. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 39:615-639    Chused, J. F. (1992) The Patient's Perception of the Analyst: The Hidden Transference. Psychoanalytic Quarterly 61:161-184     Chused, J. F. (1990) Neutrality in the Analysis of Action-Prone Adolescents. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 38:679-704     Chused, J. F. (1987) Idealization of the Analyst by the Young Adult. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 35:839-859     Chused, J. F. (1982) The Role of Analytic Neutrality in the Use of the Child Analyst as a New Object. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association 30:3-28 

On This week's episode of From Beer to the Bible, Sarah is joined by Chris Wilson, Owner and Founder of ASIC Recovery Services! They discuss finding one's self, overcoming and trusting God's path, and overcoming drug addiction. Today's scripture is Jeremiah 33:6.

Hook-up culture has evolved through the decades. Physically meeting someone at a party, or a club, has migrated to a digital platform where connections happen with the swipe of your finger. Behind those brief uncommitted sexual encounters are biological influences and interesting scientific research as it relates to overall health and well-being. If you are in a crisis or think you have an emergency, call your doctor or 911. If you're considering suicide, call 1-800-273-TALK to speak with a skilled trained counselor.RADICALLY GENUINE PODCASTRadically Genuine Podcast Website Twitter: Roger K. McFillin, Psy.D., ABPPInstagram @radgenpodTikTok @radgenpodRadGenPodcast@gmail.comADDITIONAL RESOURCES 1:30 - Hot Buttered Whiskey Cider - Dishing Up the Dirt10:00 - APA: Sexual hook-up culture16:00 - Sexual Hookup Culture: A Review - PMC17:00 - “Hooking Up” Among College Students: Demographic and Psychosocial Correlates | SpringerLink24:00 - What Happens To Your Brain After Having Too Much Casual Sex | by Tracy Luk | P.S. I Love You27:30 - Mary Ainsworth | Strange Situation | Attachment Theory32:45 - Father absence linked to earlier puberty among certain girls | Berkeley News34:00 - Pair Bonding - an overview | ScienceDirect Topics36:00 - Are We Monogamous? A Review of the Evolution of Pair-Bonding in Humans37:30 - 11 Monogamous Animals That Mate For Life (It's Not Just Penguins)41:00 - Orgasm gap - Wikipedia47:00 - Why Sex Is Sacred | Psychology Today48:00 - Oxytocin and Social Relationships: From Attachment to Bond Disruption56:30 - Amazon.com: This Is Your Brain on Birth Control: The Surprising Science of Women, Hormones, and the Law of Unintended Consequences57:30 - Idealization and Devaluation in BPD1:02:00 - Over nearly 80 years, Harvard study has been showing how to live a healthy and happy life

It's one thing to feel good about what we do, and another to feel truly worthy from the inside out. When we increase our self-worth it allows us to take our needs more seriously, get on our own side, and change our lives for the better. On this episode of Being Well, Rick and Forrest explore how we can develop a more durable sense of self-worth. They talk about self-worth vs. self-esteem, what causes people to lack self-worth, Rick's personal story of developing a true sense of worthiness, and why more self-worth probably won't turn you into a narcissistic a**hole.Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.Key Topics:0:00: Introduction1:00: The value of self-worth2:50: Will improving my self-worth turn me into a narcissist?5:45: What makes people more likely to struggle with self-worth?6:50: Distinguishing self-worth from self-esteem9:30: Rick's own journey to a better sense of self-worth14:55: Inner attacker, inner nurturer, and the beleaguered self.19:15: The process of building up your nurturing parts27:20: Investigating negative stories we tell ourselves30:55: Mutual rapport and being loving33:40: Social aspects of developing self worth, and why therapy works36:50: Non-social aspects38:20: Relating to yourself from a less ego-oriented perspective44:40: Vulnerability and tenderness in our interactions with others46:05: Recap Sponsors:Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test.Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world's largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout!Connect with the show:Subscribe on iTunesFollow Forrest on YouTubeFollow us on InstagramFollow Forrest on InstagramFollow Rick on FacebookFollow Forrest on FacebookVisit Forrest's website

Brandon talks with Tracy Malone (Author & International Educator) about her new journal 'My Story of Narcissistic Abuse' and how it helps process the emotions behind the idealization, devaluation, and discard phases of narcissist abuse.  You can purchase My Story of Narcissistic Abuse by clicking here. Tracy Malone's website is https://narcissistabusesupport.com If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please click here or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@gmail.com Thank you to our sponsor BETTERHELP. If you need online counseling from anywhere in the world, please do go to https://www.betterhelp.com/nap Get started today and enjoy 10% off your first month. If you or someone you know are experiencing abuse, you are not alone. DomesticShelters.org offers an extensive library of articles and resources that can help you make sense of what you're experiencing, connect you with local resources and find ways to heal and move forward. Visit www.domesticshelters.org to access this free resource.  Join our new Community Social Network at https://community.narcissistapocalypse.com/ Join our Instagram Channel at https://www.instagram.com/narcissistapocalypse Join our Youtube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpTIgjTqVJa4caNWMIAJllA Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Brandon talks with Tracy Malone (Author & International Educator) about her new journal 'My Story of Narcissistic Abuse' and how it helps process the emotions behind the idealization, devaluation, and discard phases of narcissist abuse.  You can purchase My Story of Narcissistic Abuse by clicking here. Tracy Malone's website is https://narcissistabusesupport.com If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please click here or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@gmail.com Thank you to our sponsor BETTERHELP. If you need online counseling from anywhere in the world, please do go to https://www.betterhelp.com/nap Get started today and enjoy 10% off your first month. If you or someone you know are experiencing abuse, you are not alone. DomesticShelters.org offers an extensive library of articles and resources that can help you make sense of what you're experiencing, connect you with local resources and find ways to heal and move forward. Visit www.domesticshelters.org to access this free resource.  Join our new Community Social Network at https://community.narcissistapocalypse.com/ Join our Instagram Channel at https://www.instagram.com/narcissistapocalypse Join our Youtube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpTIgjTqVJa4caNWMIAJllA

As I've mentioned a few times in previous podcasts I'm always amazed whenever I come across significant wisdom in unexpected places. You can run into it almost anywhere and the sports world is certainly no exception. In basketball Phil Jackson is a former NBA player who became a coach and won more NBA titles than any other coach in the history of the game, eleven championship titles in all, which is truly impressive given how difficult the coaching position is. Not only do you have to master the details of the game, you also have to blend the egos of some extremely talented multimillionaires into a cohesive group that thrives on true teamwork.           Surprisingly for me it turns out that Jackson has had a somewhat mystical and spiritual approach to life for many years, which he claims was a major factor in his success. In 1995 he wrote a book called “Sacred Hoops,” featuring some of his esoteric understandings and there was this one quote that I'd never heard before that really got me that stated, “In Zen it is said that the gap between accepting things the way they are and wishing them to be otherwise is the one tenth of an inch difference between heaven and hell.”           This hit me on a lot of different levels which always gets me thinking. The first thing was the idea that heaven and hell were only a tenth of an inch apart. I'd always been taught that heaven was way up there, while its opposite, hell, was way down there. This idea that they seem close enough to be other sides of the same coin was revolutionary for me.  But it reminded me of a quote from a letter that was found in Abraham Lincoln's desk after his assassination which can still be found in the Lincoln Collection of the Library of Congress. It was supposedly a channeled message from a psychic and it said that “Heaven and Hell are conditions, not locations.” So, if heaven and hell were actually inner states of consciousness, it seemed like the pathway to heaven was somehow connected to accepting things the way they are, while hell had something to do with wishing them to be otherwise. This led me into considering a mental process that we each have called “Idealization.” Now this is where you have a desire for something and you develop a fantasy about having it. In Jackson's Zen quote you're wishing for things to be other than the way they are and you start weaving a fantasy about it. And we all know that there's an enormous difference between fantasy and reality. As an example, let's say you decide to get a new car and you start shopping for one. After a while you start to settle on this one particular kind of car, you start feeling good about it and your mind starts painting mental pictures about it for you. You may imagine a million different things. You're driving in it with your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, kids - whatever. It can go on and on but the important thing to be understood is that your idealizations are always positive and never negative. In all your imaginations you never imagine the feeling you would have if you went to a store and when you got back to your car there was a dent in the door because somebody dinged you when they open their car door. Or you never picture getting a flat or being stopped by a policeman and getting a speeding ticket.  That's all the stuff of real life while all these fantasies are happening within the dream world of your idealizations and once you actually achieve your fantasize desire and you get what you think you wanted, of course it turns into a whole different ballgame. Humorist Larry David put a funny spin on it in an early episode of his show, “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” He and his wife Cheryl had decided to buy a new home. They found a place on the beach in Malibu and when they walked in, the living room had an enormous picture window overlooking the ocean. The view was absolutely magnificent. Now, I'm paraphrasing the dialogue here but this is the way I remember it. “Oh Larry! Look at the view! It's absolutely incredible,” Cheryl says. “Two weeks,” Larry replies. “What do you mean, two weeks?” Cheryl asks. “You won't notice it after two weeks,” he answers. “You'll be so wrapped up in everything that's happening in your normal life, you won't even notice the view anymore.”  Cheryl was idealizing the idea of moving to the home with this incredible view and imagining how wonderful it would be to live there. And Larry, with his hard-boiled New York sensibility, went straight for the reality of every day daily life. Of course, one of the main reasons his stuff can be so funny is because of his talent for putting his finger on things that can make us feel uncomfortable about ourselves but still make us laugh. Now idealization is often followed by something that is broadly termed “Buyer's Remorse.” Before you get the object of your desire you still construct the idealization. But once you've actually had it for a while, you start dealing with the reality of it, which rarely, if ever lives up to the fantasy you had in your mind. It reminds me of something that happened to me about 25 years ago when our daughter was an adorable five-year-old and we used to shoot an enormous number of pictures of her.  The photo technology seems like ancient history now but this was before the digital age and we took pictures with cameras that had film.  You would shoot an entire roll of film and then take it to a camera shop to be developed into printed photograph. Every picture cost you money so you were operating within a bit of a limit on how many would take. It's hard to imagine such a primitive time now, right?  So, I always used the same neighborhood camera store and I became familiar with the young woman who worked behind the counter. I had probably been coming in for about three years and one day she told me I wouldn't see her again because she was about to take a new job. And she told me with enormous excitement that after years of trying, she had finally landed a job in a hardware store. It'd always been her dream and now it was coming true! She was incredibly excited. Of course, we each have our own playbook of desires and personally it didn't hit me as such a dramatic improvement to be making the move from working in a camera store to working in a hardware store. But what do I know?  Anyway, we had a nice friendly goodbye and the next time I came in someone new was behind the counter. Then a couple months later when I came back, to my surprise my former clerk was back behind the counter. When I asked her what happened to her job at the hardware store she said with a smile, “Well, I found out that the reason the grass was greener was because it was Astroturf.” At first, I was struck by how simple and funny her comment was. But as you can see, it stayed in my mind for all these years because it pointed to a much more profound truth - the difference between the artificial and the real, which may just be that one tenth of an inch difference between heaven and hell. Maybe it's the celebration and appreciation for what's real, which is on the deepest level for life itself, rather than the constant chasing after the artificial fantasies of the mind's desires which never end, no matter what you have. Maybe that one tenth of an inch difference between heaven and hell comes down to the state of our consciousness as we live our everyday lives. Whenever I ponder the idea, I'm always struck by how simple it is - that it all comes down to where we choose to focus. And I'm going to leave you with two quotes that are so simple that you might not even notice them, but they're so profound that they always bring deeply positive changes to me. The first one is from the world renowned Indian guru Parmahansa Yogananda who said, “The minutes are more important than the years.” And the second quote takes us back to the world of sports, which is where we first began. This one is from Bobby Jones, the great US champion of the 1920s, who is still widely regarded as the greatest golfer of all time. He was talking about a simple secret that he had discovered that had turned him into the great champion that he had become. And he said, “It's nothing new or original to say that golf is a game that is played one stroke at a time. But it took me many years to realize it.” Now that is a deceptively deep concept.  No matter what has happened in the past or what you think may happen in the future, you have to focus on the present.  In golf it all happens just one stroke at a time. And in life it all happens just one breath at the time. The mind has to dwell in the past or the future. But the breath only happens in the present. And that is where the treasure of existence is. It really couldn't be any simpler but how many of us have realized that one tenth of an inch difference? Again, these podcast just present ideas for your consideration. So, let's just leave it there for now and let's call this the end of this episode. As always keep your eyes mind and heart open and let's get together in the next one.

Episode:27 Title: Idealization vs. devaluation Date: 10/11/2022 Greetings to you! Welcome to my podcast journal where I share my awakening from my narcissist induced nightmare! Hornswoggled means “to trick or deceive (someone)” and ohhh let me tell you, I have definitely been Hornswoggled and by someone so close to me, for at least the past 20 years. My Mom. I have decided to share my experience to offer support to others who are going through the same thing my family is. The content I have found surrounding Narcissistic abuse by professionals and fellow survivors has brought me so much comfort in knowing we are not alone. This Podcast is meant to share my experience, information I have found helpful and the sources so you can check it out on your own, and share my feelings as I unpack this huge blow, as well as share content that has helped me find answers. If you have a story of your own that you would like to share you can email the show @ Iwashornswoggled@gmail.com , Tweet the show on twitter at @HornswoggledPod on twitter, or head to www.hornswoggledpodcast.com to leave a voice mail message, find the show notes and to listen to past episodes! Does taking your narcissistic ex back always mean that another cycle of idealization - devaluation - discard will start? https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAfterNarcissism/comments/wiqffi/does_taking_your_narcissistic_ex_back_always_mean/ Understand a Narcissist From an Object Relations Perspective https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parenting/202203/understand-narcissist-object-relations-perspective From love bombing to isolation, the red flags for coercive control can be dangerously difficult to spot before abuse escalates https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-08-07/love-bombing-isolation-coercive-control-red-flags-domestic-abuse/101283156 In closing I hope each episode I record helps someone else who may be going through a similar situation or knows someone who has. It can be discoruaranging to many because they feel guilty for airing the dirty deeds done by others, but we should never feel shamed into silence. I would also Like to add, that I feel it is very important for us not to take on the identity of what was done to us, but instead identify as a person who is overcoming what was done to us as we grow closer to our true self and not the victim role our abuser wants us to be imprisoned in. We don't want to become the same monster we are trying to heal from. If you have a story of your own that you would like to share you can email the show @ Iwashornswoggled@gmail.com , Tweet the show on twitter at @HornswoggledPod on twitter, or head to www.hornswoggledpodcast.com to leave a voice mail message, find the show notes and to listen to past episodes! Until next time, have a great day and God Bless

BPD Splitting More Devaluation Less Idealization In BPD Relationships - A.J. Mahari goes deep into BPD Splitting revealing that there is no continued cycle of idealization to devaluation but rather devaluation to its cessation temporarily to BPD base mood. People with BPD do not see or hear you for who you really are just as object other parent representation re-experiencing repetition compulsions cycles of childhood adverse experiences. These relationships are unhealthy and impossible.

A commenter to my Youtube channel left a comment as to his theory orbelief that there is so much more involved in and happening for people with suspected or untreated Borderline Personality in the initialIdealization Phase of beginning a relationship. A.J. Mahari points outhow and why this person's trying to apply perceived logic and rationalabout people with BPD isn't a part of the initial idealization phase

Inside BPD Idealization Does or Did the Borderline Love You? A.J. Mahari explains how you are not seen and heard in idealization either. The intense and fast relationship beginning with a person with BPD is creating a fantasy bond within a trauma bond. Untreated people with BPD can't love or attach to you. You are, to them, "Object Other Parent Representative within the unconscious repetition compulsion cycles of untreated borderlines.

Listen right to end...... #breakup #newlysingle #dating #redflags #NarcissisticAbuse #Narctok #narcissists #narcissism #npd #npdabuse #narcopath #psychopath #stalking #harassment #heartbreak #betrayaltrauma #cheater #cheat #liarliar #newsupply #narcissisticsupply #lovebombing --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/lw-hawksby6/support

Why do we idealize? The figures to whom we attribute impossible wisdom, strength, or truth seem endless: political candidates, spiritual teachers, holy books, entire religions.... What if we were to examine why we idealize (as adults) and then look for similar admirable qualities in ourselves? How might this liberate us to do and be more than we gave ourselves credit for?

Cameka Alexander, a behavioral counselor and owner of Fasttell non-profit joins us today. She and I have a candid conversation about misogyny and how it show's up in the relationship dynamics between fathers and their daughters. Ms. Cameka Alexander, a behavior counselor, offers her theory on why fathers “hate” their daughters and how this affects their safety and security throughout their lives. She and I also discuss the impact of how this has affected her personally through her own relationship with her family and her personal values. Lastly, she shares her thoughts about how giving a child what they want instead of teaching values, may cause more trauma and problematic behaviors down the road. *Please note: Information provided on this episode are general suggestions and is not applicable to every situation or person. This episode may not be suitable for everyone, and the information provided should not be substituted for treatment with a licensed mental health practitioner. Some of the information discussed on the podcast can be sensitive in nature, therefore listener discretion is advised. The opinions of the guests on A Date with Darkness Podcast are independent of the opinions of Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD, LPCC.  Connect with Cameka Alexander here: Cameka on TikTok Cameka's Instagram Cameka's Website Fast Tell Girl Watch the video podcast on Youtube: A Date With Darkness Email questions or comments to Dr. Jones adatewithdarkness@gmail.com  Sign up for the free ebook on Red  Flags in Your Relationships and the free weekly newsletter for tips about narcissistic abuse at www.drnataliejones.com Individual and group membership coaching sessions opening soon. Get on the mailing list to be the first to know here. Visit the website for more information: https://www.adatewithdarkness.com Let's keep the conversation going via social media: Instagram: A Date With Darkness Twitter: @Adatewdarkness Facebook: A Date With Darkness To connect with others who are seeking support from hurtful and abusive relationships please join the Facebook group: A Date With Darkness group

Welcome to the Conversation. Today Kirsten and Alexis dive into dissecting what motherhood means. They discuss: *How history, religion, and culture impact societies larger view of motherhood. *Idealization vs Valuing Motherhood. *How the idea of Reparenting fits into understanding motherhood and fatherhood. *Impacts of Idealizing Motherhood. *the Value of partnership families. *Female leaders who are forging these conversations. *Ultimately how they love their motherhood. This topic started with an article Alexis wrote for a therapist's blog. Check it out here: Alexis's Article The article shares a personal experience from Alexis's life and how learning to address the topics of motherhood as a relationship, reparenting herself, and discovering her inner mother have deeply impacted her life and view on motherhood. We invite you to join the conversation further by finding us on our social media platforms. SHJ on Instagram SHJ on Facebook We love a good conversation and a good review. We invite you to leave us a review on your podcast app. This helps us grow our listeners and spread the Sharing Her Journey message. Thank you for joining us today.  

People sometimes tell Ali that they wish their marriage was like her 20+ year marriage to broadcaster George Stephanopoulos. They just seem to be a golden match. So in this episode she is exploring what “couple envy” is and informing her marriage fans - don't! Psychologist and writer Dr. Joshua Coleman says couple envy is really just part of our basic human nature - to compare and contrast. He and Ali also talk about why it's better if your spouse is NOT your best friend, why it's actually good for a marriage to commiserate with friends about partners, and the critical keys to sustaining a long relationship…oh, and “sex envy” is a thing too! If you have questions or guest suggestions, Ali would love to hear from you. Call or text her at (323) 364-6356. Or email go-ask-ali-podcast-at-gmail.com. (No dashes) Links of Interest: Dr. Joshua Coleman The Atlantic: Dr. Joshua Coleman The Key to Escaping the Couple-Envy Trap See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode of the podcast, I discuss what idealization of romantic partners is in relationships, and why we do it. In the beginning of relationship, there are some of us who get caught up in the idea that this person is the "one" therefore we refuse to evaluate evidence to the contrary. *Please note: Information provided on this episode are general suggestions and is not applicable to every situation or person. This episode may not be suitable for everyone, and the information provided should not be substituted for treatment with a licensed mental health practitioner. Some of the information discussed on the podcast can be sensitive in nature, therefore listener discretion is advised. The opinions of the guests on A Date with Darkness Podcast are independent of the opinions of Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD, LPCC.  Watch the video podcast on Youtube: A Date With Darkness Podcast Email questions or comments to Dr. Jones adatewithdarkness@gmail.com  Sign up for the free ebook on Red Flags in Your Relationships and the free weekly newsletter for tips about narcissistic abuse at www.drnataliejones.com Individual and group membership coaching sessions opening soon. Get on the mailing list to be the first to know here. Visit the website for more information: https://www.adatewithdarkness.com Let's keep the conversation going via social media: Instagram: A Date With Darkness Twitter: @Adatewdarkness Facebook: A Date With Darkness To connect with others who are seeking support from hurtful and abusive relationships please join the Facebook group: A Date With Darkness group

In this episode, I share the coaching space with an Enneagram Type 7 about navigating the frustration he experiences when what is hoped for or the “ideal” (so to speak) is not met. 7s often have these moments or seasons where their rosy colored glasses get cracked or they just can't find the silver lining in an experience & it weighs heavy on them. It's like all the tender feelings the Type-structure was avoiding come flooding in & it's exhausting & overwhelming. In our conversation, we talk about the loss that we naturally experience in transitions & how we can honor what was lost and find closure. Okay friends, let's take on a posture of curiosity as you listen into my coaching conversation.Interested in joining a Type Group? Fill out the Interest Form to learn more & express interest as Type Groups are being formed for your Enneagram Number. Fill out the form at https://forms.gle/g39yjtXLiPnWLvML6Learn more about yourself and others in an upcoming virtual workshop series with Abbi. Register at www.abbirodriguez.com/enneagram-sessions

This week we welcome back Dr. Julie Hanks! We continue where our conversation left off and talk about the idealization of motherhood and it's effects on all women. We talk about how being secure in your own choices allows for better connection-- connection with other women and with our children.  --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/fromthemouthsofbabes/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/fromthemouthsofbabes/support

Welcome to the Living in Paradox Podcast!Paradox in Relationship- Part 2 29:20Join us for the beginning of this conversation in Episode 3. Paradox in Relationship- Part 1.We join relationship coach Larry Byram in a discussion and exploration of Intuition, Direct Knowing, Unity Thinking, objectification, subjectification and idealization as they relate to our relationship dynamics. How does our perception of ourselves and others determine the quality of our relationships? What is it to be with ourselves and others, clean of our baggage, with empathy and compassion? We are all in this together.Larry has spent the last 40 years researching these questions (and so much more) and creating classes and coaching that support us in diving deep into the heart of the matter to find our creative essence and how best to connect and create with others. This material is concentrated and intuitive and will push the envelope of how you think relationships function best.In This Episode, You Will Learn:Intuition- joining feelings and emotions into a higher level intelligence. (3:10)Direct Knowing- joining sensations and thoughts to be in the moment, acting from what you know. (4:30)Unity Thinking- integrating Intuition and Straight Knowing to see that we are not really different and all in this together. (7:05)News flash! The United States is not at the forefront of consciousness. (10:05)Subjectification-imposing my ideas over others. (14:35)Idealization-projecting my ideas of you, on you to make you better. (15:00)Objectification-evaluating others by appearances. (16:03)The paradox of Pregnant Duration (18:15) Resourceshttps://higheralignment.com Larry Byram Let's Connect!Email: hello@drannakarin.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.