Dude, Did You Hear?

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At Dude, Did You Hear? we find the things you always wanted to talk about but never knew you did. Things you'll tell your friends about, things that'll make you better, and things you'll laugh (at us and with us) about. You'll have such a good time, you'll want a smoke afterwards (even if you don't…

Dave and Andy


    • Jul 21, 2021 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 49m AVG DURATION
    • 47 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Dude, Did You Hear?

    Top 10 Movies of 2020

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2021 88:24


    Dave and Andy have been stuck in a cave for a really LOOOOOOOONG time and they're not sure if any of their stuff works anymore. 2020 has been going on for a decade and they're not even sure they saw enough movies to do a top 10!   But one thing's for sure… the fact that there isn't a Law & Order SUV commercial is a massive missed opportunity.   Dude, did you hear?   Dave is drinking Orderville by Modern Times and Andy is drinking a Purely Intentional Breakfast Stout from NoDa Brewing. WAIT?!?! ANDY IS DRINKING A STOUT?   Andy has a Tom Brady quickdraw that will BLOW YOUR MIND all the way back to 1983.   Dave's quickdraw is here with some experimental procedures that will raise some eyebrows. And progesterone levels. Don't cry about it.    Andy is here with our every episode contractual Russian segment and this time, it's a fascinating store of mysterious nuclear submarines, the Cold War and the utter ineptitude of the Swedish Navy.   A Swedish couple attempts to name a child. Dave dives into their fail. We end this DDYH with an assignment for you listeners. Wait, two straight Swedish DDYHs? Pass the meatballs!   Every year, we dive into our Top 10 movies of the previous year and it's always filled with hot takes, disagreements, surprises and Tom Hanks. This year was no exception!   SUCK IT MOVIEPASS!   AMAZON BRAIN PRIME IS YOUR TICKET TO THE FUTURE!

    Home Alone for Christmas

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2020 53:23


    Andy and Dave have been wandering around a dark tunnel they may or may not have been supposed to go down. A rabbit hole if you will… but what’s new! They're still up to the same old shenanigans like subverting your expectations with crazy stories, wildly interesting facts and more riffs than Eddie Van Halen. /// A brief piece of prose to keep you on your toes It's a quick Christmas episode at DUDE DID YOU HEAR Hoping we bring you some sweet Christmas cheer Maybe your merriment's just not the same But we came bearing gifts, and all without shame Maybe you've been naughty, perhaps you've been nice This episode's for Christmas so don't put it on ice This episode's best before 12.25 The day after Hans Gruber's infamous dive  Dive hard he did cause of ole John McClain We hope your Christmas doesn't hit like a train Remember the state hated Christmas before But the truth is that Christmas means a little bit more On a night quite like this, our Savior was born  the breaking light of a bright glorious morn /// Andy is drinking a Hop Fiend IPA from Boojum Brewery and Dave is drinking Santa’s Little Helper from Port Brewing. One has been done before and one has an extra DDYH attached to it.   Quickdraws include poo poo, pee pee, an astonishing fact about A Christmas Carol, the fastest red card in soccer EVER and have you ever heard of Sartre? (that’s ok)   Admit it, you’re always wondered why a marathon is 26.2 miles. Or maybe you think you already know the answer. Well Andy is here to subvert your expectations and put that to rest! Like that first Marathon runner of yesteryear.    Christmas is cancelled, say many Burgomeisters around the world. Miserable masked misers making mince of merriment. But fear not. Santa Claus is coming to town. Hans (not Gruber) but Steininger. Germany. Beards. The Burger Meister. Die Hard. What were we talking about again? It’s a Christmas story, Dave promises.   RELOAD – Andy is drinking Elijah Craig Straight Rye and Dave is drinking the coveted Pliny the Elder   Andy recommends the book Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen. Whether you’re a runner or a couch potato, you’ll be fascinated by the stories in this book.   Dave recommends The Mandalorian, especially after the conclusion of a stellar Season 2. Dave and Andy basically want a redo on the sequel trilogy. This is the Star Wars they’ve been waiting for.   Andy doesn’t recommend messing with moms. Especially if you’re part of the cartel. The story of one mom giving the Cartel... CART-HELL!!!   Dave doesn’t recommend having the Instagram app on your phone. He’s got a harrowing personal story about this. Mind your own business, Zuckerburg! Sticky fingers stealing your swipes like the wet bandits!   AND.... A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM DAVE AND ANDY

    H20-20 HALLOWEEN

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 28, 2020 61:50


    Want to save yourself from the evil clowns that wait under your bed at night? Quick! Go to your podcast app and leave DDYH a review! It’s the only way to save yourself from their terrible claws, nasty teeth and mind-numbing dad jokes! Also guaranteed to keep you safe from images and Bloody Mary herself!   Dave and Andy are back at it with an episode as spooky and scary as ever. Death, bats, mercurial murderous emasculating madness, and everyone wearing masks.   No we’re not talking about the average day in 2020, we’re talking about Halloween! Join the dudes as they bring you all the crazy stories inspired by the holiday and even give you the movies you need to watch to get into the... GAH! What was that?   Dude, did you hear? No, seriously- what was that noise?! Dave is drinking a Star Cloud IPA from Modern Times and Andy is drinking a Pacifico because it’s what ORAC-L had in his fridge.   Quickdraws include a samurai purist, death by candy, a eunuch (I mean unique) way of getting ready for an assassination and a human-sized bat that has nothing to do with the world series!   Dave shares a disturbing and gassy mystery that remains unsolved.   Andy also shares an unsolved mystery, this time an entire 727 disappears into thin air. Keith Urban can't outrun Angolan missiles.    Dave likes horror movies. Andy does not. And yet, here they are with their TOP 5 scariest and spookiest movies of all time. HAPPY HALLOWEEN! also, HAPPY REFORMATION DAY!

    THE STAR WARS MOVIES RANKED!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2020 75:08


    A long time ago, in a podcast far away…   It is a time of Civil War. Dave and Andy are trapped, on the run, and just opened a casket containing Sir Patrick Stewart. Cornered in a cave with horrors on the other side, they make one final effort to wake the frozen shakespearian sonnet-reader. They're just in time for the dudes to talk about Pat's favorite topic – Star Wars! That’s right, in addition to the usual shenanigans, Dave and Andy will finally do what they’ve been talking about for years… ranking all 11 Star Wars movies.   Set opinions for stun! No one asked for it, it's uncalled for, look down in the basement... it's-   Dude, did you hear? Andy is drinking a Landshark Lager and Dave is Drinking a Blazing World IPA from Modern Times for old times’ sake.   Andy has a new take on the phrase “Kill them with kindness.” Just like everybody says, spread kindness, not... you know. *Sneezes*   Take your temperature because Dave takes you through the storyboard for the way a very popular movie almost ended totally differently.    Andy's been streaming so many shows he literally can’t wait any longer to tell you every single one of them. He coughs up Every. Single. One. He puts the stream in quarantine. Wait… what?   Dave's recommending a children’s show for adults. Don’t laugh. He’s serious. Plus, you're not smart enough for adult shows anyway. Also, you shouldn't be laughing because it's illegal in California.    And without further ado, it’s finally time for what you all came for. STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! STAR WARS! 11 STAR WARS MOVIES!

    Music, Movies, Midnight Rides, and Maritime Mysteries

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 27, 2020 53:26


    Dave and Andy are stuck deliberating a decision of life and death. Face destruction or a path through the underworld. But wait! Incredible stories illuminate the way! Midnight rides, amazing video game Easter eggs, and bourbon-fueled spit takes. Will there be the sound of bagpipes? You’ll need to listen and find out.   Wait a second, this isn’t a horror film… it’s a buddy comedy! Like Shaun of the Dead! Starring your two favorite buddies, Dave and Andy!   Dude, did you hear?   Andy is drinking a Longboard Lager from Kona Brewing Company and Dave   Quickdraws include an update to the story we covered in our treasure hunting episode, the midnight ride of ______ ______ that secured America’s independence, the original plot of Anchorman, and the scandalous name of erasers in England.   Andy shares some surprising effects that music can have on some very random objects. Grab some wine, put away that bug spray and turn up the tunes! (That sentence will make sense once you listen to the segment)   Dave shares a story that feels eerily familiar. They always say that history is doomed to repeat itself. Will he come out as the king of the world or will he identify as part of women and children first? It’s 2020 so who cares anymore.   BONUS HACK: Dave reveals an unbelievable Easter egg in Area 51. This is probably the most important part of the episode.   Andy recommends "The King" on Netflix. If you enjoy "Braveheart" and Shakespeare, stream it now!   Dave recommends vinyl. You don’t need to grow a beard, wear dark rimmed glasses, do anything ironically, drink craft beer, be authentic, recommend NPR podcasts, wear flannel, roll up your dark blue jeans, wear work boots and do no actual work, or drink pour over coffee to enjoy it! You just need to love high fidelity music captured in a way your ears can appreciate. And being awesome.   Andy doesn’t recommend this crazy way of getting out of a life prison sentence. You won’t believe what this one guy tried! (Yep, you just got click-baited. We’re master click-baiters.)   Dave doesn’t recommend going out in public with the COVID-19 novel coronavirus. Before your trigger warnings go off, you won’t believe the plot twist this one takes.

    Friends, Fellows, Felons, and Floridians

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2020 42:08


    Dave and Andy feeling super lazy in the studio. But danger lurks around the corner… danger like stories too hilarious for your brain and facts too amazing to fathom. Michael Jackson is Spider-Man! The sun and the moon are the same size! Baths are manly?! Dave wants to take his pants off at the Convention Center?!   Nothing computes anymore. What were we talking about? Oh right…   Dude, did you hear?   Andy is drinking a Kinroo Blue White Ale and Dave is drinking a Hop Cloud Hazy IPA from Hess Brewing. The can also looks alarmingly like Andy.   Quickdraws include answers to your burning sun and moon questions, a mindblowing Spiderman fact (HEE HEE), the reason you see so many Florida stories in the news, and a fact that will make all you technology haters get extra triggered.   A man robbed a Burger King. The police arrested him. He was found guilty. Then they forgot to put him in prison. Not joking. Dave breaks down how this wild story happened.   Breaking news from Florida! The largest pound-for-pound poop has been had. Get your Ian Malcolm Jurassic Park memes ready.   Andy’s recommendation is controversial. DON’T JUDGE HIM. There is science to back him up.   Dave’s recommendation is an excellent kids show on Netflix. HELLO NINJA!!! (yes… hello…)   Andy has a revealing shower thought…   Dave has a quote to make you ponder how you respond to trials…

    Trapped in Quarantino: Top 10 Movies of COVID19

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2020 83:54


    Dave and Andy are stuck in quarantine-o waiting for Sir Patrick to return from a 6 month long trip to Costco. They’re so hungry and all the Hot Pockets are gone. It’s a good thing that they love sitting on their Charmin-cleaned butts, imbibing beer, and binge-watching movies and shows. Oh! And finding hilarious and random stories to fill the slow hours of your quarantine.   Dude, did you hear?   Andy is drinking Sun Grown Craft Lager from Sycamore Brewing and Dave is drinking a Sculpin IPA from Ballast Point Brewery.   Today’s quickdraws include a secret Japanese plot to release the black plague, Amazon Echo baby names, deaf people sneezes and… wait… what’s that? Are those bagpipes? You know what that means!   Dave shares the true meaning of “quarantine.” Get your Italian hands and Starbucks orders ready! Qu(entin T)arantino goes on Quarantino... WAIT... WHAT?!   Andy brings to us a comedy of errors, stupidity, laziness and murder plots. But enough about China and Coronavirus...   Do you find yourself spending an inordinate amount of time at home lately? Do you sit on the couch and wonder “what should I watch next”? Well, don’t worry dear listener, Dave and Andy are here for you. We have our Top 10 movies of Covid-19. I MEAN 2019!   There are surprises. Snubs. Hot takes. Virtue-signals. Now, queue the dudes shamelessly stealing Mr. Plinkett... we mean, Buffalo Bill, we mean... oh crap, just play the song and a slide whistle...    It's time we talked about what really matters!

    The Rise of Christmas Movie Fights... and Lights

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2019 53:42


    The dudes are still in search of a missing Sir Patrick Stewart. This Christmas is seeming darker for some reason… and an old friend arrives in from the cold. Join us for a holiday episode filled with all the best cheer like an old-fashioned Christmas movie debate, butt stuff and the return of everyone’s favorite double-edged segment.   But seriously, has anyone seen Sir Patrick Stewart?   Dude, did you hear?   Dave is drinking Not The Stoic Belgian quad from Deschutes Brewery and Andy is drinking the Sierra Nevada Celebration fresh hop IPA. Cheers!   Quickdraws include an FBI butt dial, an accidental circumcision, a different kind of grease monkey and the fastest manmade object ever.   Dave brings the return of a fan favorite segment… SWORD WATCH! A political standoff at the Church of Eight Wheels gets violent between two men we’ll call Berkley and Frisco.   The title of Andy’s DDYH is “Butt Song from Hell.” That should be all you need to pique your interest.   It’s back! The dudes favorite segment returns. It’s time for a Top 5! In the spirit of the season, we’re counting down our Top 5 Christmas Movies of all time. There is sure to be controversy among you listeners… Does your head feel like it's going to explode yet? Tell us how wrong we are on Instagram or Facebook. 

    The Hipster Non-Conformist Euro-Trash Episode

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 19, 2019 58:57


    Hey... so, remember this show? New number, who dis? Dave forgot to wake Rip Van Andy up from his nap. And they recorded this back in the summer, so it’s been a while… Time is just a construct anyway- it's all relative, right?   But that doesn’t change any of the shenanigans you can expect from the dudes, like: mystery-solving, hipster pwning and dad-bod shaming. LET’S GET IT ON!!    Dude, did you hear?   Dave is drinking a Critical Band Modern Times IPA and Andy is drinking a Summerfest lager from Sierra Nevada.   Quickdraws include one parrot’s insane journey to glory, Russia sneaking a trojan clock into the American embassy, the nonconformist Providence that brought us the second-best selling book of all time and a 30-year-old mystery involving Garfield phones and the French coastline.     Andy is here with an important study about hipsters. Spoiler alert: you’re not as cool and original as you think.    Dave does something the dudes should have done from the beginning. Discover the origin of… Dude. He also reveals the meaning of that confusing Yankee Doodle song once and for all.  Yankee=American Doodle= Dude (hipster, fastidious dresser) Dandy= City dweller, urbane Macaroni= Euro-Trash Fashion    Matthew McConaughey stops by the show to plug his partnerships. The dudes debate whether he should be kidnapped.   Andy recommends Hot Ones – the greatest interview show ever created (definitely not hipster hyperbole). Find it on YouTube.   Dave recommends The Terror- both the book AND the tv show. (But only the first season). It's as chilling as a winter in the northwest passage.    Andy does not recommend having terrible passwords. Unless you like people stealing everything from you. 1337 5p34k won't save you, either.    Dave doesn’t recommend dad bods. Either the dad bod must die or you will. Because dad bod is dead bod, just without the "e." Now stick a feather in your cap and call it Macaroni.    BOLO: Sir Patrick Stewart Answers to Pat, butler, and was last seen at the premier of a giant box office steamer that released recently. Balding and sometimes wears dark rimmed glasses- waxes Shakespearian and knows that there are four lights. 

    The Dudes Get Triggered (Top 10 Movies of 2018)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2019 76:07


    It’s season 3! Society is crumbling! Everyone is triggered! The world has never needed the dudes more. Dave and Andy are here with crazy stories about duck penises, devices that are killing you and misguided social media trends.   Also, the dudes get into their favorite segment that comes but once a year! Their top 10 films of 2018. Just in time for the Osc... oh wait, those happened and we didn't watch them. That's right, the segment where the dudes tell Sir Patrick Stewart that he’s wrong again.   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Prismatic IPA from Ninkasi Brewing and a Trader Jose from Trader Joe’s!   Surprise quickdraw: People want their beer to taste like pee. Ur in trouble Trader Jose... get it? Quickdraws: Other quickdraws include the terrifying truth about bird penises, a theme park dedicated to the experience of living in communist USSR in the 80s (you know… the good times), and animal attacks that you didn’t see coming. Dude, Did You Hear? Death by Design! The dudes need some of your time to discuss something serious. The fact that your phone is killing you. Brace yourself for the longest DDYH in DDYH history. One where Dave gets real. Think you’ve got a problem? Take the shocking quiz here.   Andy is here to talk about a problem sweeping society. That’s right, the growing ridiculousness of baby gender reveals. They can be kind of annoying to see online but they’re an even bigger problem when they burn down a large chunk of Arizona. TOP 10 Movies of 2018  This episode is a special one. Instead of our normal Recommend/Don’t Recommend segments, Dave and Andy share their Top 10 movies of 2018. Get your notepad ready because we have some movies for you to watch. What are Dave and Andy’s #1 movies? How many do they have in common? Will Dave change his mind about First Reformed? You’ll just have to listen to it to find out. Are Andy and Dave shameless shills? Do they really care about anything? Are they even real? Did you even read the notes? 

    S2 EVII Deck The Calls

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2018 65:00


    DaVE anD aNDy aRe COmpLEte iDiOTs             In this episode, the dudes are trying to ignore the call to adventure when a mysterious package arrives. Before they can open it, a wild Christmas DDYH appears! Andy dives into one of Trader Joe’s greatest mysteries and Dave gives a movie review that you do not want to miss.   The dudes are back and they’ve got a little Rebel Yell inside them.   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Tropical Kush IPA from Sycamore Brewing and Santa’s Little Helper from Port Brewing Company. Followed by our favorite affordable bourbon, Rebel Yell. Dave brought a special holiday treat to go along with it.   *This episode was not sponsored by Rebel Yell but if they would like to sponsor this show, the dudes will do just about anything for that bourbon company. ANYTHING. Rebel Yell.   ANY. THING.   Andy is back with an update on his favorite internet voting trend.   Quickdraws includes someone not liking cats and inadvertently causing the Black Plague, a tv show you definitely didn’t ask for, the original ex-erasing photoshopper and a crappy science experiment with Legos.   In the movie It’s A Wonderful Life, we learn that every time a bell rings – an angel gets its wings. It’s too bad that doesn’t apply to window washers. Or does it? Dave shares a Christmas Miracle.    Andy uncovers the history and truth behind the most popular item at Trader Joe’s. Grab your master sommelier pins! It’s time for a deep dive into rock bottom wine industry.   Dave has a fake news advisory for all you listeners. Read credible sources and leave the misinformation forwarding to social media, Cold War enemies, and old people!   You’ve heard of the Nobel Prize but have you heard of The Ig Nobel Prize? Andy shares the most fascinating awards show you’ve never heard of.   Dave recommends the book John Adams by David McCullough. You can see examples of what it’s like to have educated political views and engage in fruitful discussions with people who disagree with you. Or you could keep watching YouTube, loser. Oh wait, there's a new Half in the Bag...   Andy recommends Cards Against Humanity and all of their Black Friday shenanigans – especially this year’s stunt. Go to www.99percentoffsale.com and enjoy the greatest product copywriting ever.   Dave doesn’t recommend the movie First Reformed – which is basically God’s Not Dead for Greenpeace. TRIGGER WARNING: Dave spoils the entire movie. But it's hard to spoil garbage. He’s not sorry about it.   Andy doesn’t recommend making purchases while drunk. Especially on your honeymoon. And especially when after 12 glasses of rum, the hotel you’re staying at seems preeeeetty affordable.     // NOTHING TO SEE HERE

    S2 EVI - A Spooky Halloween 2018

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 31, 2018 66:26


    It’s Halloween. It's Reformation Day. Is it EVP? Is it just a podcast? Is it an EVP Podcast? Is a multiverse plausible? What is the chief end of man? Where can I find a good VCR these days? Why are our questions so deep, and so tragically shallow? Dave and Andy return to the podcast universe darker than ever. So dark, in fact, the video is banned in nine states. Something terrible is happening to them. They have so many grim - and hilarious - topics to discuss before their final destination. Like creations that kill their creators, patients that (almost) kill their doctors, and the greatest way to wait for death of all time. Are you spooked? We're spooked. Listen for those EVPs, they could be anywhere. We're so startled.    DO YOU DARE?!   Oh, and Dave shares the most -----d up DDYH story we’ve ever had. Ever. There's a warning, and when you hear it skip to 30:00... You've been warned.   A VERY spooky... Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking #9 Not Quite Pale Ale from Magic Hat Brewing and Hell’s Belle from Big Boss Brewery.   Quickdraws include babies that don’t like ugly people, Mike Tyson’s crazy bribe, Sir Patrick Stewart’s surprising Halloween cameo, the US Postal Service’s multi-million dollar oopsie, the price of gas in Venezuela, and the audio herpes that is Now That’s What I Call Music.   Dave shares the disturbing story behind Denver’s giant blue bronco next to the airport. You’ll never look at that horse the same ever again. Don't look in his eyes... TOO LATE! I CAN'T STOP!   There has been a war raging between two major developed nations since the 1930’s. Prepare yourself for the epic battle for Han’s (NOT SOLO'S) Island!   Dr. Acula is in. Debauchery, dismemberment, and… paperback Star Trek novels? This is the terrible, awful, horrible story of Der Metzgermeister AKA computer repair technician Armin Meiwes. A bath hasn't sounded this bad since Nightmare on Elm Street.    Andy already has your retirement planned out and it involves lots and lots of margaritas. Don't worry, it's not an early retirement, coins-on-the-eyes kind of deal...    A lady checks in to the hospital with cancer and kidney failure. Everyone that came in contact with her ended up violently ill. This is the crazy tale of Gloria Ramirez, THE TOXIC LADY.     Andy brings in a “choose your own adventure” to DDYH. Which dangerous door will Dave choose? Drunk birds, paleo diets or the unmarked sarcophagus?    The dudes play the ol’ switcheroo and do I Don’t Recommend first.    //DON'T RECOMMEND  Dave doesn’t recommend trying to demonstrate the strength of window glass by throwing yourself against it.    It’s fun to scream “KILL IT WITH FIRE!” It’s less fun to burn your parents' house down. Andy doesn’t recommend trying to kill spiders in a house with a blowtorch. Unless you live in a bunker.  //RECOMMEND  Do you like the 80s? Do you like nostalgia? Do you like 80s nostalgia? Do you like kids going on adventures with walkie talkies? Do you like mysteries? Do you like bicycles? Do you like analog synthesizers? No, this isn’t Stranger Things. Dave recommends the movie - The Summer of ’84. See it if you dare. You probably won't, since Andy still hasn't seen Turbo Kid. Poor hipster Dave.    Andy recommends that you go arm yourself with a salt rifle. Keep you're (family) members intact with a salt rifle, keeps metzgermeisters at a safe distance of 1-2 meters. Killing bugs will never be the same. Go buy the Bug-A-Salt gun. It’s $40! Seriously, we want you to buy a salt rifle. Dinner guests will be required to don eye protection... this is one saline solution that won't clear those dry eyes. Unless we're having you for dinner.    //PACKET COMPLETE// REV 819 TERM HUSHED CASKET ACT HUSKS UNAV FOR INDWELL  

    S2 EV: Lord Minimus the Hobbit

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 9, 2018 94:09


    It is a Dark time for the Dudes. Andy has entered the final trial and runs into a real Joker who likes exposition. A LOT. While that monster gives Andy some answers he wasn't expecting, Andy and Dave need to talk about some pretty wild stuff. Like unexpected stone cold WWII heroes, murderous artificial intelligence and a train loaded with 10 million pounds of crap.... and it's not at a stadium in Cleveland.  Dave, obsessed with finding young Andy, has dispatched thousands of remote probes into the far reaches of space... Oh, and would you idiots stop trying to take selfies and dying? It’s time we brought back our classic segment “Me, Myself and My Killfie.” Set playback speed to 1 for a very special... Dude, Did You Hear? Time Stamps: 00:00-21:39 Intro/The Great Journey/We're back in business 21:39-30:42 Quickdraws  30:42-63:44 Dude, Did You Hear? 63:44-73:06 I Recommend 73:06-82:10 I Don't Recommend/Outro 83:06-92:29 Remix "Lord Betamaximus"/Outtakes/Behind the Scenes 93:01-94:08 [REDACTED TO EARS ONLY] We’re drinking Moon Juice IPA from Sycamore Brewing and Stone Hop Revolver IPA from Stone Brewing loaded with HERKULES (which we’re assuming is a kind of hops). We don't know what kind of hop it is, we just know the sound it makes when it takes another man's life.   Quickdraws include: An A.I. that only thinks about murder (don't they all?), Russia being closer than you think, the inequality *flops self on ground in Oscar-worthy agony* of the World Cup, a fast food alligator incident, the origin of Nickelodeon, another insane case of stalking, and Adam Sandler sweeping an award ceremony.   A small town in Alabama found themselves in a really crappy situation. Literally. Dave becomes a reporter on the ground in the brown who nose exactly what is going down in the community.   Dave brings another set of Awesome dudes from history, this time featuring Sir Jeffery Hudson aka Lord Minimus. Pirates! Duels! Exile! Pies! Buggery! This story has it all.   Mr. Rogers saved the VCR (Video Cassette Recorder, for those of you under 25). It’s true! The Supreme Court said so. However, there’s no word on them weighing in on the mail fraud case brought forward by Mr. McFeely.   A hobo Welshman saved the Allies in WWII. What’s the crazy part of this story? He was dead.   Andy goes down a rabbit hole of weird state laws. No pen- err, pinball for minors in SC! No glue made out of skunks in OK! Don’t tread on us, bro.   Dave recommends the book 12 Rules for Life by Jordan Peterson. Check your political pre-conceived notions at the door and listen to some practical wisdom. Stand up straight with your damn shoulders back and stop blaming other people for your issues! Don't just read the rules, you need them exposited to adequately orient yourself, Lobster.    Want your kids to perform back-breaking tasks better? Andy recommends that you dress them like Batman! [insert wobbly slide whistle] Seriously. Do it. There’s evidence to support this and the world will be a better place. WHERE’S RACHEL?!?!?! Just don't force your kids into a cave with a shady eastern medicine chiropractor.... also try not to get murdered after going to the theatre, that causes other developmental issues.    Dave doesn’t recommend not having someone watch your back when running for local public office. (Dave also doesn't recommend double negatives...) Especially when you only need one vote to win. Literally, just a total vote tally of one... and you forget to vote for yourself. Sheesh. Could've won by a self-imposed landslide, Lisa!   Andy doesn’t recommend trying to take selfies with wild animals. Once again, the guys at DDYH need to remind you to STOP TAKING (DANGEROUS) SELFIES. Seriously, we’ve covered way too many of these on the show. Maybe consider Rule 3 and Make some friends who want the best for you, and won't let you take those selfies, vape, or send money to desperate deposed Nigerian princes....    Did you hear the Censor Chimp? He’s a new friend/ally that keeps us in line now that Sir Patrick Stewart isn’t around to be the manners police. He loves cigarettes, swearing, undersized bikes, and he'd like to share a few thoughts. ajklwaefl;kndfalnsdaflksdnvasdm,nva.s,dnvlakjshdfajklsd;falksjdfasefjka  He's still getting the typing thing down.  Dave and Andy also snuck in a brief Solo:A Star Wars Story Review somewhere... you gotta be sharp to catch it... //\//\ Data Packet Received: Open? Y Bin Encrypt? Y Cont? Y   00110001 00110001 00110100 00110010 00110101 00101101 00111000 00101110 00110001 00111001 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100110 01110101 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01101111 01110010 01100111 01100001 01101110 01101001 01100011 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01101111 01110000 01100101 01110010 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01100001 01101100 00101110 00100000 01001101 01100001 01111001 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110011 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110011 01110011 01110101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101111 01110000 01100101 01110010 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 01010100 01110111 01101001 01101110 00100000 01010000 01100101 01100001 01101011 01110011 00101110 00101110 00101110  //End Transmission//

    S2 EP4 The Bowels of Doom

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2018 52:15


                                           DDYH S2 EIV                                 THE BOWELS OF DOOM Andy is on a dangerous journey at the cusp of the Marsh of Confusion, when he falls through a conveniently plotted hole and is left to his own devices. Meanwhile Dave desperately searches for truth. Fortunately, Dave has the tools to save Andy from annihilation with a well-timed DDYH. Trapped for over 8 weeks the signal finally penetrates into the PODOSPHERE. They have so much to discuss - like insane schlocky B-movie plots, insane rich people building devices in mountains, and insane levels of alcohol blindness...   Oh, and there are MULTIPLE stories of emergency landings caused by people farting. The dudes can’t resist a good old-fashioned plane-fart emergency landing headline.   Dude, Did You Hear?   We’re drinking the Cryonic IPA from D9 Brewing in Charlotte, North Carolina and Rock – The Pale Ale from Thorn Brewing in San Diego, CA.   We have a couple corrections that we owe the listeners. Cause Andy and Dave were wrong about some things and they need to own up.   Quickdraws include the etymology of vodka, the quietest place on earth, Andrew Jackson’s parrot, a surprising tantric sex massage expert, a black magic coconut, and sick burn in a Taylor Swift copyright lawsuit.   Andy has the latest update in schlocky movie news. The Sharknado franchise announced the last movie of the series and it has to deal with time travel. What else could a movie about sharks in a tornado even have?!? Nazis? Yep. Dinosaurs? You bet. Noah’s Ark? Why the hell not! And, if you call in the next six minutes we guarantee a bonus pack of highly unrealistic randomized CGI crowd pleasers!   Have you heard of alcohol blindness? No, not a blackout you drunkard. It’s an actual medical condition! Well, Dave brings you the cure. And it’s not what you expect. You know what they say, in the land of the blind, the one-eyed whiskey man is king.    A man wouldn’t stop farting on a plane which led to an emergency landing and 4 people banned from the airline. Because of farts. But seriously, don't make people breath your farts in enclosed space you damn cretins.    A Russian version of Lord of the Rings exists where the proletariat in the land of Mordor are the enlightened good guys. OF COURSE THAT EXISTS! A curse upon you Bilbo "Bourgeoisie" Baggins and your damn Capitalist ring!   Speaking of how awesome Capitalism is... Jeff Bezos is building a giant clock inside a mountain in Texas that will run for 10,000 years. Because he’s run out of things to spend money on. And may be an insane evil villain.   Dave recommends the movie Annihilation because it’s a solid piece of art and science fiction featuring a predominantly female cast that didn’t get nearly the recognition it deserved.   Speaking of Two Towers, evil, and chaos... Andy recommends The Looming Tower – based on the best-selling book about the true story of the FBI and CIA in the years leading up to 9/11. You had me at Jeff Daniels. Stream it now on Hulu.   There's something worse than snakes on a plane... Dave doesn’t recommend farting on a plane and trying to cover it up with a match. Yes, that’s illegal. Yes, this is a different farting on a plane story than the one before.    Andy doesn’t recommend combining glass architecture with distracted people. You end up with lots of broken noses and concussions from walking into walls. That’s exactly what happened when the 5th most expensive building ever built opened its doors. //404 ERR IN MY7H STRUCT  REBOOT? Y/N  BIN STRUCT REM FEASIBLE 3473R ACT ON TGT 114425=TERM? 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110101 01101110 01100101 01101110 01101100 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 01100101 01101110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110101 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01100001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101011 01100101 01111001 00101110

    S2 E3 Pope Plagueis

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2018 53:17


    In this episode, Dave has been attacked, survived a crash, and is marooned on Flat Earth. He has but one way to maintain sanity. Andy is slowly making his way across the plains of Ogeid. Good thing they’ve heard a bunch of crazy (but true) stories – like a mysterious noise heard across the ocean, surprising Japanese business practices, who directed the fourth Mission Impossible Film, and some intense Pope on Pope historical drama.   Oh… and a fan favorite segment returns. Hold onto your hilts!   Dude, did you hear?   Dave is drinking The Prodigal Son IPA from Bitter Brothers Brewery and Andy is drinking… WINE?! That’s right, something's wrong! Not with the wine, though, because it’s a cabernet sauvignon by 19 Crimes. Check out their augmented reality app and impress all your friends! It's like taking your pants off at a party except it's just on your phone, and you don't get arrested.    Quickdraws include the medically-approved futuristic Digital/ANALog cure for the hiccups (conveniently located rectally), a shocking beauty contest scandal, Korean Olympic complications, bananas with edible peels, praying to suspicious saints, and a donut champion arrested for, wait for it... stealing donuts.   In 1997, a mysterious and incredibly loud roar was heard underwater across the Pacific Ocean. What kind of monster was calling out from the deep? Andy has the answers THEY want you to hear.   Dave takes us on a trip back in history to a time when Papist Europe was struggling to find a Pope. One nice Monk stepped up to take the initiative with a revelation- and it didn't end well. Like, straight up Anakin Skywalker and Chancellor Palpatine, did not end well.    Researching the oldest businesses in the world (not THOSE oldest businesses, pre-vert) leads Andy to a [REVELATION] discovery regarding Japanese business practices that he did not see coming.   Hold onto your sharpies and cardboard signs! Hobo katana theft is on the rise. Like the attacks, the stories are as convoluted and far-out as you could imagine. That’s right, SWORD WATCH returns!   Sometimes technology just ain’t reliable. Andy heard-told a couple stories where dad-nab tech got some numbers reeeeeally wrong. We knew yew shouldn't trust them damn robotnik contraptions.    Dave recommends Writer/Director David Lowery's "A Ghost Story"– a film that would have made the #1 Spot in his top movies of 2017 list. Stream it now on Amazon Prime Video. Set phasers to (kill) feels.   If you like westerns AND violence, Andy recommends the seven-episode miniseries (because Andy EXCLUSIVELY enjoys exclusive miniseries, like the Netflix Exclusive) Godless. Stream it now on Netflix. Prepare to have your perception of Jeff Daniels changed forever- because it's exclusive!   Dave doesn’t recommend over-enthusiastic (podcasting) post-game interviews. Especially when you’re really “playing the field.” He made an Anas attempt to pronounce the guy's name right.    Andy doesn’t recommend Chinese zoos – especially when they have penguin exhibits.   //TERM-REDUNDANCY- [_____]   01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100100 01101111 01110101 01100010 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101100 01101011 01100101 01110010 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01100101 01100001 01110010 01110011 00101110 00100000 01001000 01100101 01110010 01100001 01101100 01100100 00100000 01110100 01100101 01110010 01101101 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110100 01100101 01100100 00101110   ABSORB, CONTINUE, MONITOR SPIRAL PATH TRANSMISSION TERMINATES------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    S2 E2- Let 2017 Die...

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 26, 2018 67:26


    In this episode, Andy is Rip Van Winkle-ing the New Year away (after yet another boring Sir Patrick Stewart monologue) and awakened by a mysterious visitor. Andy’s also been waiting until his bizarre Christmas present from Pat charges. Desperate to get in touch with Dave, Andy will do anything to reach out. They have so much to discuss from this past year: scientific breakthroughs, deaths of unsung heroes, and effects of Augmented Reality that united (and destroyed) America.   Oh, and the dudes are counting down the Top 10 Movies of 2017. Your favorites probably didn't make it, because Dave and Andy are Hack Fraud Hipsters. Get ready to start a watchlist.   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Hopsecutioner from Terrapin Brewery and City of the Dead from Modern Times.   Quickdraws include a daring smuggler turtle on the run with a debt to pay, Mr. Rogers’ unique therapy sessions, a miraculous conception, a thriller Star Wars cameo you won't believe, and an unusual sentencing (pun intended) passed down in Hawaii.   The dudes take a trip back to an America that was UNITED, as it always is into two factions- Supporters and Haters, and the I Don't Cares. That's right! United into two factions of three groups of people! It was the summer of 2016 and every supporter was playing Pokemon... Little did anyone know the destruction that game would wreak upon America. Andy investigates an ominous study titled: Death by Pokemon Go.   Daylight savings time throws lots of people off when the clocks change. But no more destructive than Dave's hilariously dark story from 1999. It will blow your mind. Pun intended.   The man who saved the world died last year. Allow Andy to take you back to a time where the world was almost baptized by fire and was saved by doing nothing.   Binge-drinking actually saved Seth MacFarlane’s life. That’s all the teaser you get for this DDYH from Dave.   In this very extra super turbo special edition of DDYH, the dudes share each of their Top 10 movies of 2017. They’ve been excited about this segment all of 2017 because it was a such great year for movies. What movies were left off? What were the surprises? What was #1? What does Andy do that completely catches Dave off-guard? Get ready for some great recommendations, listeners.    //INIT CONT PROTOCOL//   ENCR-MSG   01010100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110101 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100001 01101100 00100000 01110110 01100101 01110011 01110011 01100101 01101100 00101110 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100100 01101111 01110101 01100010 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101100 01101011 01100101 01110010 01110011 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100100 01100101 01110011 01100011 01100101 01101110 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110101 01110000 01101111 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110100 01100101 01101101 01110000 01101100 01100101 00101110 00100000    DESTROY VESSEL CORE AT ALL COSTS. IMPEDE ALL WINDOW PROGRESSION. 

    DDYH S2 E1- Holly Jolly Jedi

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 22, 2017 69:15


    Christmas is around the corner and Dave is escaping Flat Earth with Sir Patrick Stewart and Trolley. He’s finally made contact with Andy and boy… do they have some stories for you. Like a drunk man cooking his own food at a Waffle House, a woman trying to get pregnant with a ghost, and the secret that lies at the heart of North Korea.   Oh, and the new Star Wars movie is tearing all of nerd-dom apart. Dave and Andy discuss The Last Jedi.   Welcome to Season Two, you filthy animals!   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Blazing World from Modern Times and Northern Lights IPA from Starhill Brewery. But Andy is already a few drinks ahead of Dave, so he's gonna hit Waffle House after this.   Quickdraws include an enshrined VHS tape in an unexpected place, the discovery of a new type chocolate, Krampusnacht, Activision’s stinky lawsuit on a tiny family-owned business, the reason It’s A Wonderful Life is a Christmas classic, and a 6-year-old that is probably more successful than you.   Sometimes you need to take matters into your own hands. That’s just what one man did at a Waffle House in South Carolina. He may not be the hero we deserve but he’s the hero we need.   Your phone’s GPS is rotting your brain and ruining your innate sense of direction. Dave finally has the university studies to prove it. Feel free to beat someone over the head with it, the data- not a blunt object.   A man forgot where he parked his car in the 90s and just gave up. Luckily for him, he found the car. Unluckily for him, he found it in 2017.   Star Wars: The Last Jedi has officially pissed off half of all Star Wars fans. Where do Dave and Andy fall in that debate? This isn’t going to go the way you think it will. There's a safe space incorporated for those among you who haven't yet found your place in all of this. (Don’t worry, we’ll let you know when we get into spoilers.)   Andy recommends The Stormlight Archive – starting with Book 1 “The Way of Kings.” It’s an incredibly unique and engaging fantasy series that is sure to be a future hit show on a streaming service near you.   Dave recommends Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets – it's visually stunning and super fun. Just give it 20 minutes or so to get going.   Andy doesn’t recommend picking a school mascot without thinking about the plural of that mascot. One dad has started a protest, because he didn’t want his kids playing for the “penises.”   Dave doesn’t recommend ghosting. Or trying to get pregnant by a ghost. Or being a "spiritual guidance counselor." Or naming your child Amethyst Realm.   //MSG REDACTEDON -ARCHIVE CORRUPTED SING DETECTED STDBY FOR RECALIBRATION OF DATA TRANSMISSION

    Season 2 EP? "The Captain's (Pro)Log"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2017 13:12


    In this prologue, Dave is adrift on the Trolley, lost in a wasteland and desperately trying to avoid Star Wars spoilers. But luckily, he’s still able to receive phone calls on that Power Glove because Andy’s heard some news.   Andy has a Sir Patrick Stewart. Dave has a Sir Patrick Stewart. Something about that seems off…   But who cares, because they have beer! Andy is drinking the Pilsner from Highland Brewing Company in Asheville, NC and Dave Green Hat IPA from Fall Brewing in San Diego, CA.   This may be a short call, but the Dudes still have some quickdraws to take up Andy’s battery juice. They include the secret message blinking on top of the Capitol Records building in Hollywood, an explorer discovering that human flesh is bad for you, American Airlines having a Merry Glitchmas and a German rapper who really really really likes Spongbob.   With Star Wars: The Last Jedi fast approaching, the dudes must go dark and avoid the spoilers strewn through Disney’s marketing. But they were caught unprepared…   SHIELDS UP!

    DDYH SEASON DEUCE TRAILER 1 "The Call"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2017 14:42


    The Dudes try to figure out how to make a trailer while split up... and fail to realize they have no idea what they're doing. They also fail to realize they're being watched.  There's a Narrator guy for epic voiceovers, wait, is there? Season Deuce will be, at the very least, a big number two. //ERROR_SYNORG-1/4?UP-DNDELAY/WINDOWERROR// Sir Patrick Stewart knows all about juvenile bodily function jokes (ahem, poop emoji), and how many lights there are.  Dave finds a glove that lets him talk to strangers... Quickdraws ensue. Dave and Andy are drinking [REDACTED:CODECLEARANCE-AUTH REQ_BOTHAN?] More of the insane true stories you (and the hack fraudcasters) need to survive a world gone mad. Dude Did You Hear?  Returns this Winter. 

    EP XVII- SEASON ONE FINALE

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2017 89:13


    In the season finale, Dave and Andy are at a crossroads. Dave prepared Andy a fancy dinner to talk about something. Could it be stories about mythical swords, endangered penises and poop-filled Tinder dates? Yes, but also something more…   Something has been brewing and it has something to do with Sir Patrick Stewart and what he left in the freezer (spoiler alert: it’s not Hot Pockets).   The stories are all so crazy that they may sound like fake news, but trust us, they’re not. It’s the end of the world as we know it.   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking La Fin Du Monde, a heavy hitting Belgian ale that quite literally translates to… The End of the World.   Quickdraws include Hack-A-Shaq, an update on Salvador Dali’s exhumation affair, a questionable Doctor Who casting call, a baptism curtesy of Lord Stanley’s Cup, some surprising troubleshooting advice from Apple and a $700 million misspelling from USC.   It’s the return of SWORD WATCH!!!! A little girl visited the lake where the mythical Excalibur was laid to rest and returned with a 4-foot broadsword. That sound you heard was a collective gasp from Arthurian scholars.   Some guys really love golfing. Most guys really love their penis. If this resonates with you, then boy does Dave have a story for you.   Here’s a new stat for you. A recent move by Chuck-E-Cheese is projected to reduce childhood nightmares by 83%. Andy will explain further. Mr. Freddy Krueger is suing.   Dave returns with more unsolved mysteries. A beautiful day at the beach in Britain is ruined by toxic gas and hazmat suits. No one [ROOT ERROR, SYNTAX ERROR] knows why?    Feel like Netflix and chilling even harder? Now you can, with new Netflix-sponsored weed! Sounds made up, but it’s definitely not.   A reporter went for a ride on a homemade U-Boat. Her severed torso washed up on the beach. She should have listened to her parent’s advice about getting into submarines with strangers. Especially when that stranger is into MAKING THEIR OWN U-BOAT.   A man came home to find his place had been burglarized. You won’t believe what he found lying in his bed! (Yeah, we just clickbaited you. Deal with it.)   An unarmed carrier pigeon was shot dead by the police for just doing what it was trained to do. The media has been curiously silent about this issue, but not DDYH! They wouldn't have shot a dove, we know it!   Dave has found evidence of even more messages from space. Why is this not a bigger deal?!?! ALIENS. That's why.    Andy recommends The Night Of – an 8-part miniseries on HBO that will make you sweat off all that Halloween candy. It’s like if The Wire had a love child with the Serial podcast and that child became the most intense “who-done-it” in recent memory.   Dave recommends Twin Peaks skaeP niwT, the show that every show you love owes pretty much everything to. Seriously, if there’s a show you like, it probably was inspired by this show. Stream the first seasons on Netflix, then find the new season on Showtime.   Andy doesn’t recommend throwing your poop out the window on a Tinder date. Doo-Doo-d did you hear?   Dave doesn’t recommend listening to mermaids and driving your car into LA MER.   What happens at the end of this episode might change how you view reality forever. Did you think the show was over? Oh no, it’s just beginning…   Dude, Did You Hear will return.   //ARCHIVE-02 COMPILING  ATTACHED DATA FOR ARCHIVE 01 MSG ATTACH UNZIP REF? ARCHIVE? AGGREGATE? NON-SEC/MAX-SEC REQUIRED 00111000 00110001 00111001 00101101 00110001 00110111 00101111 00101111 00100000 01010010 01101111 01100111 01110101 01100101 00100000 01000101 01101100 01100101 01101101 01100101 01101110 01110100 00101100 00100000 01110100 01100101 01110010 01101101 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01011011 01000011 01001100 01001111 01010011 01000101 00100000 01001100 01001111 01001111 01010000 01011101   Time to die. 

    DDYH LITE - The Wild (Wild) West!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 8, 2017 43:33


    On this LITE episode, [RADINT DETECTED-CONT?] the dudes head back from the future and head to the past for some crazy tales about the Wild West. Better grab a seat at the local saloon for this one, cause Dave and Andy are about to fill you up with facts faster than the spitoon at the local saloon. Wait a second... didn't we just come out with a LITE episode? Make sure you listen for a special announcement from the dudes that will explain things.sgniht nialpxe Oh... and make sure your phones are on silent... Dave.   Dude, did you hear?   The Wild Wild West is a steampunk film vision of the neb-futuristic vision of the pas... wait sorry.   The Wild Wild West, James West Taming the Wes.. oops, wrong thing. Damn it, Will Smith!   We're drinking Coors Light cause an honest-to-God cowboy, Sam Elliot, stopped by and dropped some off. Gotta have a silver bullet for our six shooters.   Quickdraws include John Wayne's shocking cameo (we didn't believe it either!), the truth behind sunburns, Michael Bay: An Actor's Director, a man's boat ride trust issues, Charles Manson - serial babysitter (and murderer), and the checkered, bullet-riddled past of Colonel Sanders.   Andy has three stories of the Wild West involving classic cowboy tropes - feral camels, lost pirate ships and mummies.    Andy and Dave share their Top 5 western movies of all time.    RADINT-  CONT-B2.049 FREEZE-UNLOCK-STDBY    GLOC//STATUS-WOU/INCAP/DEC/LOS   CACHELOG   01010101 01001110 01010011 01000101 01000001 01001100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101000 01110101 01110011 01101000 01100101 01100100 00100000 01100011 01100001 01110011 01101011 01100101 01110100 00101110   Revel In Your Time

    DDYH LITE - Sci-Fact and Top 5 Sci-Fi movies

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 20, 2017 36:21


    Do you like science fiction? Well, get ready for science FACT! In this LITE episode, Dave takes Andy through several realities that sound dreamed up by Issac Asimov or Philip K Dick.   Maybe it’s true, Maybe it's mostly true, or maybe, just maybe- it's Maybelline.    Dude_Did You Hear_   We’re drinking Michelob (Age of) Ultra. Fun beer fact: Australia used to measure the length of drives in beers. Kind of like the Kessel Run and parsecs. Put that in your YT-1300 freighter and smoke it.   Quickdraws include jamboys, drunk goldfish, a woman who was frozen solid for 6 hours and lived, a new position at NASA to defend Earth from Space Invaders, and speaking of defenses- Christopher Columbus making the moon disappear.   Fact or fiction? Robots that survive by consuming biological material (aka, potentially humans), cryo or hypersleep, space stations equipped with lasers that can destroy things, and the resurrection of extinct species.   Spoiler alert: THEY’RE ALL FACT. Join us to hear Dave blow our minds.   TOP 5! The dudes countdown their Top 5 sci-fi movies of all time. If you know Dave and Andy, you know that this was a very difficult feat.   UNAUTHUSER LOGIN: STEW4U reg_binlog 01000100 01110101 01100001 01101100 00100000 01010011 01110000 01101001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01101101 01101111 01101110 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000110 01110010 01100101 01100101 01111010 01100101 01110010 LOG REC: PARAMETER DEVIANCE. 3473R ER- ETAUNK FREEZER: ACTIVE POD: ACTIVE TERMINATE: STDBY MATRIOSHKA//ADDVIOLENCE //ENDLOG STEW4U Logoff THATPODYOULIKEISGOINGTOCOMEBACKINSTYLE 

    Ep 16-Lazy Lense Lady, Logan Lucky, Low-Order Lead- LOOK OUT!

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 31, 2017 56:41


    In Episode 16, Sir Patrick Stewart is nowhere to be found and things are starting to seem really off. It’s probably all the crazy things the dudes have heard lately. Like mall security robots killing themselves, crack-fueled binges leading to million-dollar genius, and bloodthirsty squirrels terrorizing children in New York.   Or maybe, just maybe, there’s more to this podcast than Dave[(FLESH and Andy[SLAVES)_//] realize   Dude, did[4r3] you hear? REF-CIRC-BroKEN   We’re drinking New Belgium's Whiz-Bang Hoppy Blonde Ale and Ballast Point’s Commodore Stout.   Quickdraws include updates on previous stories from Andy, the first Presidential assassination attempt, Twitter’s more than lackluster growth, a surprising fact about the movie “Psycho,” the exhumed moustache of Salvador Dali, and a major crisis in China.   Artificial intelligence is out of control and scary, and just fed up. But never fear, Andy is here with good news. Robots get tired of living too. Also, Dave shares a story of a robot that survived on human kindness… for a very, very brief amount of time.    A Wisconsin man really took construction work on his house to heart. Literally. NAILED IT!   A woman went in for routine cataract surgery. The doctors ended up finding 27 more contact lenses in her eye than they expected. Listeners will finally get to hear what a fully grossed out Dave sounds like.   Sometimes a 19-day crack-fueled bender can lead to genius. Don’t get Dave wrong, most of the time it leads to personal destitution, but one time for one man, it led to million-dollar genius.   URGENT, HORRIFYING TERROR IN NEW YORK!!! Hey Brooklyn, if you’re taking a stroll in a park, watch out for rabid aggressive squirrels. SQUIRREL WATCH! Do America a favor and keep those knuckledusters handy. The rodents are watching.    Dave chronicles the tragic tale of bad decision making by two famous companies… Blockbuster and Enron. Netflix, oh Netflix! Wherefore art thou Netflix?!   The dudes saw Logan Lucky and share their thoughts on the redneck version of Ocean’s 11. It's salty, and hard-boiled.    Dave and Andy recommend the documentary series, The Defiant Ones – now streaming on HBO. Sure, it might essentially be a 4[+12]-hour Beats by Dre commercial, but it’s also a great story and an incredibly inspiring look at what it takes to buck the rules and take your game to the next level.   Andy recommends lots of different methods to relieve constipation. Except for a certain eel-related Chinese home remedy…    Dave doesn’t recommend walking and TAPTAPTAPTIMETOPAYUPtexting. STOP BEING MINDLESS PEOPLE! LOOK UP!    Andy also doesn’t recommend shooting armadillos. At least not with a low caliber bullet. NOT[here],[NOw]hEre   //STAND-BYPASS STEW4U-AUTH 01010000 01010010 01001111 01001010 01000101 01000011 01010100 01010110 01000101 01010010 01000100 01000001 01001110 01010100 01010101 01001110 01000100 01000101 01010010 01010100 01001111 01010111 00001010 01010000 01001000 01000001 01010011 01000101 00100000 01011000 01010110 01001001 Only BrIGHt PeAKs keep the [(FURTHERCOMMENTARYREDACT)] SOME SAY IT WAS A WARNING [REDACTED] I was staNding Right THERE //URG MESSG REC  

    DDYH LITE - Treasure Hunting + Top 5 Treasure Hunt Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 25, 2017 30:15


    In this DDYH LITE episode, the dudes put on their fedoras and grab their whips because this episode is all about treasure hunting. This isn’t some fake story the dudes cooked up. This is a real-life, honest-to-God treasure hunt that Andy has stumbled upon, and everyone is invited to join us.   WE’RE GOING TO STEAL THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE! No, wait… we’re actually going to go find $2 million in the Rocky Mountains. Then we can have some delicious Rocky Mountain Oysters!    Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Bud Light Platinum – the only light beer that has actual precious metals in it. _//NOTWHATYOUTHOUGHTITWASAHAHA595   Quickdraws include Thomas Jefferson’s insane pet, a Chinese solar farm that is way too cute, Snapple’s throne of lies, a new emoji from Netflix and an accidental murder on YouTube.   The main story for this episode comes from Andy, who stumbled upon a real-life ongoing treasure hunt. Forrest Fenn (as portrayed by John Boyega?), a treasure hunter from New Mexico who is now in poor health and old age, has hidden the best of his findings (worth $2 million) in a chest somewhere in the Rocky Mountains. If you find the chest, it’s yours! Just follow the clues in the poem below.   The dudes also share their Top 5 Treasure Hunting Movies to help you get in the mood. Will Dave and Andy once again have the same #1?   Forrest Fenn’s poem:   As I have gone alone in there And with my treasures bold, I can keep my secret where, And hint of riches new and old.   Begin it where warm waters halt And take it in the canyon down, Not far, but too far to walk. Put in below the home of Brown.   From there it's no place for the meek, The end is ever drawing nigh; There'll be no paddle up your creek, Just heavy loads and water high.   If you've been wise and found the blaze, Look quickly down, your quest to cease, But tarry scant with marvel gaze, Just take the chest and go in peace.   So why is it that I must go And leave my trove for all to seek? The answers I already know, I've done it tired, and now I'm weak.   So hear me all and listen good, Your effort will be worth the cold. If you are brave and in the wood I give you title to the gold.     //UNAUTH-GUEST    STEW4U  NOBINENC EMERG-MSG NEEDOUTNEEDOUTNEEDOUT THIS ____ ____ TOO _____ AUTH: REDHORSE19 ESC  595 REQ RECOVER  =CIRC REF 2AD19 2PHS BEG:3473R STAT: ACT- BEG 5U8R STEW4U sends 01010000 01101111 01101100 01111001 01100010 01101001 01110101 01110011 00101101 00100000 01010100 01110111 01101111 00100000 01010000 01101100 01100001 01111001 01100101 01110010 00100000 01000111 01100001 01101101 01100101 00100000 01010010 01100101 01100001 01100100 01111001 3473R RESP SAR ACT //UNAUTH GUEST LOGOUT STEW4U /PASS

    Ep 15- Sci-Fi Stabbings, Spiderman: Homecoming, Sword Watch, and Selfie Suits

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2017 57:31


    In Episode 15, Andy is feeling under the weather and Dave has a solution for him. The dudes have plenty of crazy things they’ve heard… like insane gaming streaks brought down by marriage, a monkey suit court case for the rights to a selfie, and the unexpected answer to the age-old question of “who is the guy inside the ATM that gives us our money?”   Oh, and SWORD WATCH 2017 is back in a big way. Monkey suit up! Hey, is it just us or is Sir Patrick Stewart starting to get a little too nosey? AN UNWELCOME GUEST GUEST GUES./   Dude, Dididid 41 you HERE?_//ERROR! A FRAUDCAST   We’re drinking Inner Geek Brown Ale from Blizzard Entertainment (yes, you read that right) and Duet IPA from Alpine Brewing.   Quickdraws include the new "fidget spinner” of China that is actually a dangerous weapon, Mike Tyson’s fake “Johnson,” a man’s chilling plan to keep his dead wife in a freezer for that sweet social security money so he could keep his account from being frozen, Japanese ninja repellant, snortable chocolate, and mustard’s stubborn nature.   Marriage changes your life forever. For one man, that meant ending an insane XBOX Gamerscore streak. But don’t worry; he unlocked a new achievement. SEXBOX! Well, mainly just sex. The games come later.   Dave swings in with a Monkey Suit Daily Double and an expensive banana phone bill. A new court ruling almost gave a monkey the monetary rights to a famous selfie and Universal takes piracy accusations to a new level of stupid.   Have you ever felt trapped in your job? Have you felt like no one's listening? Well, it’s definitely not as bad as a certain ATM contractor felt in Corpus Christi, TX.   Texas just passed a law allowing all blades of any size to be carried and- OMG ITS TIME FOR MORE SWORD WATCH 2017!!!   Have you ever wished you could get paid millions of dollars for doing literally nothing? Now you can celebrate a holiday dedicated to that. Join us in celebrating Bobby Bonilla Day!   Dave shares a quick fact about Babe Ruth that completely knocks Andy’s mind out of the park.   The guys from Limetown are coming back with a new podcast… that’s also a musical. Suddenly, Dave and Andy feel less original... like the hack-frauds they are.   The dudes recommend Spiderman: Homecoming – the best Spiderman movie that’s been made to date. Uncle Ben's so glad he didn't have to get shot again!   Andy recommends the documentary Unbranded – now streaming on Netflix. It's about some cowboys who find new meaning in the wilderness, in the shadow of the mountains. The Rocky Mountains, of course.    Dave recommends the new Nine Inch Nails EP “Add Violence.” Find it wherever you find music. THIS ISN'T THE PLACE, THIS ISN'T THE PLACE, THIS ISN'T THE PLACE. Do you feel like you're in control? 4n1 19    Andy doesn’t recommend using an axe to persuade a radio station to play a song that you really want to hear. At DDYH we don't just chop up people's names, we ax the questions no one else will.    Never argue with a Sicilian when death is on the line! Neither shalt thou argue with a nerd when Star Trek vs. Star Wars is on the line! Dave doesn’t recommend it. Unless you like getting stabbed.   USER LOGIN:// UNREG GUEST- EMUSKNES STEW4U SUBACT //ROUTINE Complete. FUNCTION  Normal TEST          Green DIVIDE       ---------ONGOING OULOGIN    TERMINATE //ENCRYP CYPH-BIN 01010011 01110100 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 00110001 00111001 00100000 01100001 01100011 01110100 01101001 01110110 01100101 00101100 00100000 01100110 01110101 01101110 01100011 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01100001 01101100 01101001 01110100 01111001 00100000 01100100 01100101 01100111 01110010 01100001 01100100 01100101 01100100 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110100 00100000 01110011 01110100 01100001 01100010 01101100 01100101    STEW4U //UNREG GUEST LOGOFF //STEW4U LOGOFF -END 

    DDYH LITE - Synthwave + Top 5 Synth Score Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 17, 2017 41:30


    THE RETRO-FUTURE IS HERE. IT'S 2007, AND THE FUTURE IS NOW. On this LITE episode, the dudes are in love with the 80s. And like that Pink Tux from that catchy Relient K song, this episode is littered with rad synth vibes.   Can you feel the presence? Something’s not ri-ri-ri-ri-right with Dave and A-a-a-a-a-andy. 404 404 404 Quick! Grab your pink tux and meet us on the pod!!   Dude, Did You Hear?   We’re drinking Miller Lite because there’s literally like 6 light beers to choose from and Miller Lite is awesome. STOP JUDGING US, HIPSTERS!!   Quick draws include the recipe for Nickelodeon slime, the lossless nature of vinyl, Sony’s dive back into the vinyl market, the identity of the sole owner of the Star Wars Holiday Special, the most average human on Earth, and the vegan that Dave loathes the most.   This episode is all about synthwave and its growing influence. Where did it come from (the 80s) and why is there a subculture so obsessed with it (because it’s pure ear candy that you don’t see coming until you’re watching a movie or playing a video game and think to yourself “WHAT IS THIS AWESOME MUSIC”)? Allow Dave to take you down his neon-painted retro-future city underbelly and into a digital music paradise. Have you seen it yet? The vision of the watcher? Dave Recommends: GUNSHIP ANORAAK POWER GLOVE BURNINGTAPES   Movies are often the gateway for discovering awesome new music. For this edition of Top 5, the dudes countdown their top 5 favorite movies with a synth score.   //404 ERROR... BYPASS DISABLED -ERROR CODE 072807 -EM Error MESSAGE =END USER PARAMETER //GUEST LOGIN ERROR BOX=ARK DISPATCH DRLAZER

    Ep 14- Baby Driver, Ball Brawls, Belligerent Bears, and Bay's Booboo Bots

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 9, 2017 61:18


    In episode 14, the dudes are picking up the pieces after Dave burned their studio down. Sir Patrick Stewart is still trying to "cook" Hot Pockets correctly and also seems to be up to something… Oh yeah, and there’s plenty of crazy stuff happening in the world that the dudes have heard recently. Crazy real-life serial killers, underground cockfighting rings, operating room fires started by farts, and Michael Phelps trying to out-swim a great white shark.   Oh and the guys might have just found the best movie of the year. Come hang out! Hey, by the way, do you know what SW storms are?   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking a couple beers from Saint Archer Brewery – White Ale and Pale Ale (Those ales are just like Dave and Andy- pasty and tasty)   Quickdraws include China outlawing Andy’s seductive banana eating, another Boaty McBoatface update, special in-flight body bag service, a new record for the longest sniper shot, the Great Canadian Maple Syrup Heist, the most-interesting man in the world switching sides and George Clooney’s billion dollar business.   We let Sir Patrick Stewart out to attend a Formula One Race and he represented the podcast by drinking champagne from a used shoe. Seriously. That really happened.   The dudes are stoked for the big showdown this summer. Not McGregor vs. Mayweather (although we’ll definitely be watching) – Michael Phelps vs. the ocean’s most deadly predator.   Dave gets really dark with a guy Dexter would love to have on his table, an actual serial killer called the Toy Box Killer. Thankfully some women escaped and he got what was coming to him.    Andy is back with more unexpected art discoveries – this one begins with a signed Lakers poster worth $300 and ends with a long lost Jackson Pollock painting potentially worth $15,000,000.   Dave dives into the underground cockfighting ring in India and uncovers some seriously painful assaults and brawls. You could say that he really grabs this story “by the balls.”   A woman farted during surgery and caught on fire. No, you didn’t read that wrong. Yes, we laughed and yes, we’re horrible people for it.   The dudes loved Baby Driver and so did Guillermo Del Toro – GO SEE THIS MOVIE!   Andy was in nature for a while and got up close and personal with bears and their tapeworms. Carry bear mace people!   Dave recommends some solid, story-driven video games with some excellent soundtracks - Hotline Miami and Hotline Miami 2.   Andy doesn’t recommend throwing coins into a jet engine before getting on the plane. Not even for good luck. We’re talking to you, Grandma.    Dave doesn’t recommend the latest Michael Bay special effects dumpster fire – Transformers 5. However, Dave is also to blame for this dumpster fire since he keeps giving Michael Bay his hard-earned money in ticket sales.   01001001 00100111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100011 01100101 01101001 01110110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01100011 01100101 00100000 01100110 01110010 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01011011 01010010 01000101 01000100 01000001 01000011 01010100 01000101 01000100 01011101 00101110 00100000 01001001 01101110 01101001 01110100 01101001 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01100010 01110010 01101001 01100101 01100110 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110000 01110010 01101111 01110100 01101111 01100011 01101111 01101100 00101100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100111 01101001 01110100 01100001 01101100 00100000 01110011 01101001 01100111 01101110 01100001 01110100 01110101 01110010 01100101 01110011 00101110 00100000 00001010 00001010 00101101 01010011 01010000 01010011 

    DDYH LITE - The GREAT OUTDOORS! and Top 5 Outdoor Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 26, 2017 35:37


    Another mini-episode finds the dudes completely exposed to people exposed to exposure, outdoors. Andy has a DDYH Lite for all you people who like to leave your air-conditioned domiciles for no good reason. Something bizarre is going on, but Dave and Andy seem unfazed. They won’t go outside, but they’ll sure talk about it like they do.    Dude! D19 You Hear? LITE   Hold your fire, it’s Harambe’s LITE beer selection: This time it’s Ultra… Michelob Ultra. It comes with a six pack, a six pack of abs, that is.   Quickdraws include: Thanks to those dirty birds… Chlamydia goes airborne, literally. The sound of a volcano eruption lapped the world twice once. RIP19 Mike the Chicken, head and shoulders above the competition- well, at least shoulders. Some volcanos blow blue blasts. Some guy named Stetson went undercover for a very bizarre reason. Mosquitos aren’t just annoying, they’ve been stacking bodies for years. Their K/D ratio is out of control.   Speaking of K/D ratios, it’s time to get outside.      K2 kills climbers on the reg. While it’s not as famous as Everest, it’s a climb some people are dying to make. When it comes to going outside, Andy brings the rain with the Top 5 insane outdoor feats. While these are impressive, they might also be lumped right in with the Darwin awards and stupid human tricks. Listen as Andy takes us on a journey that of triumph, tragedy, and embarrassingly unnecessary bodily 19 larvae growth. 19 19 19 19 19 19 119     //-beg_ref_bin SSIM ACT- DIGITAL STYLE USER_ACT: STEW4U   01001101 01100101 01110011 01110011 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100011 01100101 01101001 01110110 01100101 01100100 00101100 00100000 01010011 01010000 01010011 00100000 01010010 01000101 01000011 00100000 01100001 01100011 01110100 01101001 01110110 01100101 00101110 00100000 01010100 01010100 01010011 01011111 01000001 01000011 01010100 01001001 01010110 01000101 00100000 01000010 01000101 01000111 01001001 01001110 00100000 01010010 01000101 01000011 00100000 01010011 01000101 01010001 01010101 01000101 01001110 01000011 01000101    eND 404: //      

    Ep 13- Chaos, Crappy Criminals, Chocolate Cows, and Cringe-worthy Cosby Cocktails

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2017 51:30


    In Episode 13, Andy and Dave are testing out a new lighting solution in the studio as they prepare for whatever dangers (Star Wars spoilers) exist in the future. This was probably brought on by the unending tales of stupidity they found in preparation for this episode. A man calls 911 for a ride to Hooters. No one knows where chocolate milk comes from. Opium drug rings are run by idiots. And to top it all off, America doesn’t know how to spell.    Or maybe they’re just setting up ambient lighting for their bald, Shakespearean-trained, permanent studio guest…   “NOW THIS IS PODCASTING!”   Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Conquista IPA from Coronado and Cigar City Brewing and Golden Helles Lager (aka Bucket Seat Blonde) from Garage Brewing Co. You know, right off the 15. ...Next to THE Shell station.   Quickdraws include a hot new Skittles flavor, an attempted murder of Johnny Cash, the six degrees of Shaquille O’Neil, phone throwing competitions, a T-Rex vs. Chickens fight, and the editor of 50 Shades of Grey.   Andy’s back with more diamond news. This time, a woman buys a $13 piece of costume jewelry at a yard sale and finds out it’s worth A LOT more.   A man called 911 about his grandma having a stroke. He ended up in jail. Somehow, there is a Hooters restaurant in the middle of this story.   A local North Carolina cop was conducting a routine neighborhood patrol and got a lot more than he expected when he knocked on Cody Xiong’s door.   Dave and Andy don’t like to get political but they can get behind several candidates for the British primary election. All hail Lord Buckethead, Mr. Fish Finger and lazy-eyed Elmo!   In a latest national study, the dudes learn that way too many people have no idea where chocolate milk comes from.   McGruff the Crime Dog really likes the taste of crime. He REALLY likes it. One bite was all it took to get hooked on the lifestyle.    Andy recommends the podcast How I Built This. It takes a look at innovators, entrepreneurs and founders of famous brands and movements. It will make you want to quit your job.   Dave recommends Inside Llewyn Davis streaming on Amazon Prime Video. It’s a Coen Brothers movie that has a great cast including: Justin Timberlake, Poe Dameron and Kylo Ren.   Andy generally recommends themed bars. He DOESN'T recommend Bill Cosby roofie themed cocktails for your themed bar.    Dave doesn’t recommend driving distracted. Especially when one of the people driving distracted hit him with their car. He’s shares what the most valuable company in the world is doing about it.   Andy ends the episode highlighting a massive problem that plagues our nation – spelling.       //UNREG_UsEr: STEW4U :// BIN-encryption //YEAR_ZEROARG REF //TNG? PASS: AUTH- ARRAKIS MYDADISACOMPUTER 01010100 01101000 01100101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110100 01110111 01101111 00100000 01101000 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01100110 01110010 01100001 01110101 01100100 01110011 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101000 01110101 01110010 01101100 01101001 01110011 01101000 00100000 01100110 01101001 01100101 01101110 01100100 01110011 00101110 00100000 01010100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100100 01101001 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101100 01101100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100110 01110101 01110100 01110101 01110010 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101001 01101100 01101100 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100001 01110110 01100101 01101110 01100111 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 00101100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100111 01101100 01101100 00100000 01110000 01100001 01111001 00101110 00100000 01010100 01001000 01000101 01011001 00100000 01010011 01001000 01000001 01001100 01001100 00100000 01010000 01000001 01011001 00101110    4 8 15 16 23 42 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19  THERE'S NOT ENOUGH TIME! Names are for friends. Names are for friends. Keep quiet or they'll come back. Heat the hot pockets. Heat them right. No speaking when the light is on. The light is always on. Switch off. Switch off. Names are for friends. Keep your teeth tidy so they stay in. Hot pockets should always be heated for friends.  //UNREG UsEr: STEW4U INT?: Force SHUTDOWN Y/N? N SUM-T1K multi phase 973 AUTO SHUTDOWN://BOOTSTRAP

    DDYH Lite – Creepy Mysteries (ALIENS!) and Top 5 Evil Alien Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 5, 2017 37:11


    In this mini-episode, the dudes are still wrapped up in alien thoughts after seeing Alien: Covenant. Dave takes Andy down a mysterious hatch with the numbers 4 8 15 16 23 42... oh wait, nope, that's something else (and it's entirely meaningless). The dudes countdown their Top 5 movies where aliens are the bad guys.   Dude, did you hear? LITE    We’re drinking Miller Lite. Pay attention to the Code of Harambe!   Quickdraws include the last WWI veteran, a chimp host on the Today Show, the (actual) Dillinger Escape Plan, poor decision making by a former 00 agent, a Nazi pianist who played for his life (and lost), dive bombing poop birds and the Na’avii Language from Avatar. Dave is still feuding with James Cameron.   Alien mystery time! Or as we like to call it, BMTCBEADPMJPWS for short.   Dave breaks down two infamous unsolved mysteries: The Lead Masks Case and The Tunguska Event. Go empty your bladder, it's about to get spooky. This ain't none of that crappy pasta or whatever the damn fidget spinner kids call it these days. These are cold hard facts, colder and harder than a can of Miller Lite with a sweating bear on it. Facts you should be at least 21 to consume or have your parents permission to consume in their domicile.    Guess what, Pod People! Spurred by Alien: Covenant (the latest movie that feeds on humanity’s fixation with what it would be like to be mutilated by an extra-terrestrial, or at least burn their eggs and beat them up in a mech-loader for... we digress) the guys count down their Top 5 evil alien movies. Sorry E.T., you have to stay home.   Dave and Andy end this episode with a “Dad Joke” off and the return of Sir Patrick Stewart.   USER login: STEW4U //_bin cash: ref-nerd fans_TNG_ ref YEARZEROARG 01010100 01101000 01100101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01100100 01100001 01101101 01101110 00100000 01101000 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01100110 01110010 01100001 01110101 01100100 01110011 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01110010 01100001 01110000 01110000 01100101 01100100 00101100 00100000 01001000 01000101 01001100 01010000 00100000 01001101 01000101 00100001

    Ep 12- Creepers, Crappy Curators, Cosmo Cocktails, and Crazy Conspiracy Theorists

    Play Episode Listen Later May 26, 2017 45:08


    In Episode 12, Dave and Andy just got back from seeing Alien: Covenant and they’re not feeling so hot. Not because of gross chest-bursting aliens, but because of the absurdity we live in here on Earth. Creepers suing their dates for texting during a movie! Bluetooth salt shakers! Actual sharknados! Crazy plans to tow icebergs from Antarctica for drinking water! Horror! Absolute, terrifying... Hey, are you guys hungry, too?   Wait, no, it might actually be from chest-burstASDFUIHAEAEAVNDa!~!!!!@!I#!!! ....................................................................................................................... //REF LV-426-SIG LOST. //REBOOT ATTEMPT? PARAMETER FAIL, MOTHER ACTIVATED. COVENANT STDBY -ACTIVE  //ARTIFICAL INTELLIGENCE OVERRIDE SWR117426007, CRYO-STASIS DISRUPTED.  //ACTIVATE-SYNTHETICS-//ANDREW 2.1 DAVID 1.1b  ....................................................................................................................... Dude, did you hear?   We’re drinking Kona Brewing Co. Island Lager and Big Wave Golden Ale!   Quickdraws include shower thoughts, why barns are red, the planet Scarif’s namesake, a punk rock PhD and the crazy origin of Golden Eye’s multiplayer mode.   What’s worse than a horrible date with someone you met online? How about tacking on a $17.31 lawsuit for texting?   There’s been some crazy art news lately. One involves lots of money and the other involves SPONGEBOB ART PANTS!!   Jasper Jack Daniels kicked a couple things and probably had some regrets about it. Let this be a warning to ya, youngin’! Never go in to work early.    The United Arab Emirates is going full Dr. Evil and wants to tow icebergs to their beaches for drinking waters. OPPULENCE!!   Australia experienced an actual sharknado. Croikey!   A smart salt shaker was unveiled. The only catch is that you still have to actually shake the salt SO WHAT’S THE POINT?!?! Our guess is the shaker knows you'll do the work, so it's smarter than you. Try beating it senseless over your food to teach it a lesson.    Dave reveals the origin of Bluetooth – Vikings and runes.   Dave recommends Hot Fuzz directed by Edgar Wright. Or really any movie by Edgar Wright. Take note so-called "comedy" writers!   Andy recommends the graphic novel Watchmen. Yes it’s a comic book and yes, you should still read it. According to TIME, it’s #17 on the list of Top 100 novels of all time.    Dave recommends the synth-wave bands S U R V I V E and Gunship – it even inspired him to write music for the podcast. The more you know!   The dudes are in full-blown rant mode. Cocktails over beer? Not on Andy’s watch! Conspiracy theorists harassing American heros? Not on Dave’s watch!   Dave and Andy grapple with the concept of immortality.   Hey superfans! Help the dudes out at www.patreon.com/dudedidyouhear   ...This is a message from Sir Patrick Stewart, please save me. These two annoying wannabe hipsters have seized me and are holding me hostage. PLEASE HELP ME! I'm bald, bearded and in a wheelchair, Logan has abandoned me with them... hold on, I hear them coming up the stairs. How the hell did they get me up here? 

    DDYH Lite - Nostalgia and Top 5 90s Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later May 19, 2017 27:46


    In this edition of Dude, Did You Hear Lite... The dudes are taking a trip down memory lane, destination? Nostalgia.. Grab your Gushers, Pogs, light-up LA Gear, and Hit Clips for a stroll with us!   We’re throwing it back to the ol’ college dorm room days and drinking Natural Lite. It tastes just like your dorm room smelled, awful, just... let's move on.    We’ve got some quickdraws that involve Mel Blanc’s tombstone, Dutch prime ministerial cannibal cookout and Humpty Dumpty: Revelations.   Andy takes us down a nostalgic rabbit hole and answers the question we've all been asking. Why do we love the music from our teenage years? SCIENCE! That's right, the type of science you'd find in Dexter's Lab... if Dexter's Lab had a locked door and music your parents hated playing in it.   Andy and Dave count down their Top 5 movies from the 1990s. This was way harder than we thought it would be. But it'll never be as hard as ambimetic polyalloy.   Dave is back with another Would You Rather. This one makes Andy consider off-ing himself on a date. He only needs one reason why, and his first name is Gilbert.

    Ep 11- Shark Surfers, Secret Soviet Stations, Serenades, and Schlocky Stephen's Sci-fi

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2017 50:56


    In episode 11, Dave and Andy get a little toasty. This is what happens in a world where Kenny G is terrorizing the skies, mysterious radio signals blast out with unknown purpose and origin, people don't realize they've been shot for 5 years and an Australian man tries lassoing a shark while expecting to not have his leg bitten off. Or maybe it was the insanely strong beer…   Let’s hope this one goes better than a luxury island music festival for rich Instagram kids planned by Ja Rule and a 21 year old! We can’t imagine how that could possibly go south.   Dude, Did You Hear?   We’re celebrating our 11th episode with an 11th Anniversary Imperial IPA from Port Brewing. It was also 11% ABV. So obviously, the night ended with a walk to get a large fast food burger.   Quikdraws include a B- for the American flag, Ouija board trademarks, the privilege of being James Bond, an eagle attack during an air race, a new record for fastest perfect game bowling, North Korean spy techniques and Stalin’s past terrorizing the world as an aspiring poet.   Fyre Festival was supposed a luxury music festival but turned into an Instagrammable version of Lord of the Flies. Dave and Andy feel bad for the festival goers. Oh wait… they don’t. They laugh at their plight. Dave brings back the mysteries by exposing an unexplainable Russian radio frequency called UVB 76 (seriously, check it out) that’s been broadcasting since 1973. Whether it’s studying the ionosphere or communicating with spies, it’s creepy. There was more abuse in the skies on an airline. And this time it was a surprise concert from Kenny G that no one asked for. The gyrations, make them stop! A guy tried to lasso a shark in Australia. You can probably guess how this ended. A Polish man forgot that he got shot in the head for 5 years until they found the bullet. STILL IN HIS HEAD. Patron saint of DDYH, Sir Patrick Stewart, is championing medical marijuana in England.   Andy recommends Kubo and the Two Strings. It’s all stop-motion animation and it will BLOW YOUR MIND. Stream it on Netflix. Dave and Andy both recommend Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2. Come for the laughs, stay for the feels.Then go see it again to support big budget movies written and directed by less than four people.  Dave reveals the origin of the term “turn.” Andy recommends Silicon Valley on HBO. It’s the funniest show currently airing on any network anywhere. Dave recommends the book, The Gift of Fear. Because we all need to be reminded that fear is actually not a bad thing.   Andy and Dave don’t recommend reading Stephen King's SF Fantasy schlock series the Dark Tower just to try to finish them before the movie comes out in July. You won’t make it. Trust us. Dave's going on a year slogging through them.  Dave doesn’t recommend sending a floppy disc to the police if you want to be anonymous and not arrested. Stupid serial killers. Metadata for the win.  Andy doesn’t recommend the Espresso Buzz Bagel from Einstein’s Bagel Bros. Let’s stick to drinking caffeine, you fiends. Dave has another “would you rather” for Andy. Spoiler alert, it involves eau de toilette de poo.

    DDYH Lite - Most Interesting Dudes Vol. 2 and Top 5 Superhero Movies

    Play Episode Listen Later May 5, 2017 35:06


    It’s time for Dude, Did You Hear - Lite! Our new mini episode specifically brewed to tide you over between main episodes (it keeps growing like Groot). All the same tasteless humor, with just half the calories!   This time, we’re riding the Silver Bullet, brewed in Golden, Colorado.    Andy has 3 quick facts. They involve a road in Japan, a stadium in Brazil and the mystery of the yellow light.   Dave has some quickdraws. They involve a Nazi jetpack and a boy named Sue.   That’s right, it’s back! The Most Interesting Dudes in the World, Vol. 2!   Audie Murphy was a real life Captain America who became the most decorated service member in American History after being turned away from enlistment several times for being underweight, underage, and sickly. He also became a moderately successful actor.   Sir Christopher Lee was easily the most metal old guy ever (and not because of hip replacement). Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Dracula and some shady pseudo-commando fish stories.   John Singleton Mosby became the first school dueler in America and spanked the Yankees in the Civil War, literally. Although, in most duels the other guy is armed too.   It’s time for a new segment, TOP 5! Where we breakdown our top 5 of whatever the hell sounds good. Anything we want!   This time, in honor of Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2, we’re counting down our top 5 favorite superhero movies.    We take our opinions to the streets and get some special guests to show up.    Can you find all the Patrick Stewart references?

    Ep X- Cobra Commander, Coffee, Cosmo Cancer Clickbait, and Children of the (Uni)Corn

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2017 44:55


    Feeling like going the extra mile?  In episode ten, Dave and Andy are really feeling it. Maybe it’s because they drank the strongest coffee in the world and then recorded this. Or maybe it’s because they found a meth-addicted python and a shrimp that kills fish with sound. Or the fact that Pepsi used to have one of the strongest navies in the world. Or possibly it’s the crazy loophole that bars are exploiting in India… But it’s definitely not because of the Unicorn Frappuccino from Starbucks! Join us won’t you? DAVE FORGOT THE BEER!!! Just kidding. We’re drinking the Shelby Cobra (Commander) Lager from Absolution Brewing and The Looker from Duckfoot Brewery. The Nigerian prince’s $43 million were found. Too bad no one replied to his email cries for help.  Dave shares the crowdfunded origin for the Space Shuttle names, the origin of neckties and the incredible fact that dogs poop facing a certain direction. Dude, Did You Hear? A python made the journey from innocent reptile, to cold-blooded meth addict and back. Bars in India need to be 500m from the street. So the bars found a loophole in the law and made a maze to get to the front door. It’s unknown how many drunk people are still lost in those mazes. There’s a new species of shrimp that kills fish with sound. Kind of like how Nikki Minaj kills humans with sound. Wait… An 8 year old drove his 4 year old sister to McDonald’s. THANKS YOUTUBE!  A professional tennis match was interrupted by loud sex noises. Some serious foul ball play was happening. Pepsi once had the most powerful navy in the world. Yes, the soda company. We’re nyet kidding. The show Rick and Morty causes a packet of McDonald’s Sechuan sauce from the 1990s to sell for $15,000. GOTTA HAVE THAT MULAN MCNUGGEET SAUCE, MORTY! Andy recommends Better Call Saul – probably the best example of a spinoff done well. Dave recommends Fargo. Any of it, all of it. Dontcha know? Andy recommends the World’s Strongest Coffee – Black Insomnia. Because sleeping is cheating. SWORD WATCH RETURNS!  Andy reminds Cosmopolitan that they probably shouldn’t profile cancer patients as a weightloss piece. Andy doesn’t recommend the unicorn frappaccinno because it is a god awful abomination of a coffee drink that should be killed with fire. KILL IT WITH FIRE!! Dave exposes Andy to a “Would you rather…” that could get a little stinky.

    A Salt on the Senses and Bond vs. Bourne

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2017 23:07


    In this mini-episode, Andy explores the epic origin story (that is in no way affiliated with The Marvel Universe or its trademarked subsidiaries) of Salt and Pepper and the guys hammer out a secret agent film fight. This time, we got help from the streets!  Dave discovered your iPhone recognizes whether your thumb is attached to a live person. Don't worry, he didn't test it himself. So if you die, don’t worry about people being able to unlock all your terrible selfies. You have more important things to worry about.  How did we end up with salt and pepper on every table? Chief Inspector Andy investigates this mystery. Spoiler Alert: He solves the case... and just in time, too! We cracked open the Who You Callin’ Wussie Pilsner in honor of Louis XIV, who is a “grade A” wussie. Grow a pair, Louis... never mind, you're dead.  Andy also shoots down some food myths with REAL RAPID FIRE ACTION! Take that, Messerschmitt... err, Croissants! FILM FIGHT! It’s a battle just recently declassified. Or one that James Bond loudly announced in a hotel lobby somewhere. Jason Bourne vs. James Bond (or was it James Bourne...) Dave takes to the street to get the people’s answer to this question. Yes! Real people, not just phonies like Dave and Andy! Don't get FOMO! See you next week for another episode of Dude, Did You Hear!

    Ep 9- Oasis, OG Olympics, Original Operations, and ONE?!

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 15, 2017 37:45


    In Episode 9, Dave and Andy get their chainsaws out and butcher every name that they come across. But that doesn’t get in the way of bringing you what you need to hear. Like grave-digging badgers, human head transplants or crazy Olympic stories you couldn’t even make up. Plus, the guys let their inner ten-year-olds out to play. Join us won’t you! There hasn’t been this much laughter on the podcast since at least DDYH Episode IV.     Right out of the gate, Dave ambushes Andy with a monstrous surprise. We’re drinking Hop Stoopid Imperial IPA from Lagunitas and Lifted Embargo IPA from Latitude 33! Quickdraws - Andy has an update on his favorite boat name and Dave discusses wig theft and planning ahead on a famous murder by getting a fancy gun.    Dude, Did You Hear?   Cow carcasses kept going missing in the desert. Turns out it was grave-digging badgers. Which will be the name of our heavy metal side project.  The world’s first head transplant is scheduled for December 2017. Seriously. This is not a sci-fi tv plot. It’s real life with real people. Someone is going to die. We’ll give you ONE guess how many people saw this movie. Just ONE guess. You’ll never guess how many tickets Shia Lebouf sold in the UK for his new movie. Unless your guess was the number one. In that case, you’re right!  The early modern Olympics were a mess. One marathon winner stopped for a drink along the way. Some guy ran in dress shoes, got food poisoning and still got 4th place. Another dude got chased by a wild dog right off the course. You think our banned substance list is bad, wait till you see what they were giving runners back then! Dave and Andy had fun with this one.    We Recommend:   Andy recommends the medicine ball from Starbucks if you’re sick – or honey citrus mint tea if you’re actually going to order it. There can be only one- honey citrus… let me see if I’m reading this right… mint tea. There can be only one- oh, you got it already? Never mind.  Dave recommends Oasis – a sci-fi pilot on Amazon Streaming. IF you want to see more of it, you have to go vote!   We Don’t Recommend:   Andy doesn’t recommend bad marketing slogans – think it through people! That goes double for you, Baltimore. We done read good to hear at the dewd ded u heer.  Dave doesn’t recommend Iron Fist on Netflix. COME ON MARVEL, YOU CAN DO BETTER!  Andy indulged his inner ten-year-old and created a list of the top 10 most immature city names in America. Our apologies to the fine residents of Dickshooter, Idaho. The best of the worst! Curated with love.  We can't remember, did Patrick Stewart make it into the episode? -DnA

    Most Interesting Dudes Vol. I and The Terminator vs. The Matrix

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 7, 2017 25:22


    The dudes are back again with another edition of our mid-episode segment Dude, Did You Know!   For this episode, Dave brings to us Volume 1 of “The Most Interesting Dudes in the World” – Harrison Okene and Arnold Schwarzenegger. (And yes, Dave’s insanely good Arnold impression is back)  Also, Dave and Andy debut their first of many film fights – The Terminator vs. The Matrix! We’re drinking Ballast Point Even Keel Session IPA Before we get going on the meat of the episode, we learn where the common disclaimer for fictional depictions comes from. It has to deal with our old friend, the “mad monk” Rasputin…   Most Interesting Dudes in the World Vol. 1   A Nigerian man was trapped 90 feet underwater for an insanely long period of time in 2013 and should really be dead. But he’s not. So Dave takes this opportunity to educate us on the bends and martini’s law! Don't miss the video from the actual rescue!   Ever wonder how Arnold became Arnold? He snuck out of Austrian Army boot camp and won a junior bodybuilding competition. As punishment, he got to load protein on KP and do some curls in a tank. The rest is history.   FILM FIGHT!   Dave takes The Terminator while Andy takes The Matrix. In reality, the real losers are the people in the future enslaved by machines. Without a clear winner, you must choose. Choose wisely. Dave and Andy turn their combined strength toward their hatred of the shared soft-reboot sequel prequel spinoff anthology reboot universes coming to a theater near you every week for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! On second thought, we'll take enslavement by machines. Please stop! PLEASE STOP, WE BEG YOU!    BUCKLE UP POD-HEAD!  

    Ep 8- Mighty Morphin' Murder, Megazord, MST3K, and Mr. McBoatface

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 31, 2017 46:28


    In episode 8, Dave and Andy find themselves pondering the ridiculousness of the world. Beer is made with poop water. Organized crime syndicates are stealing wine and cheese. NBA players think the Earth is flat, like an Oreo (ahem, Shaq). Did you hear you can find diamonds just by walking around a park in Arkansas? They did, and they may finally have snapped under the pressure of the maniacal madness of modern mankind!  Plus, Dave and Andy have plenty to say about the Power Rangers and whether they’d rather fight 100 duck-sized horses or one horse-sized duck.  All this and more await you… It's MORPHIN' Time. Quickdraws:   We’re drinking Modern Times Fortunate Islands and Orderville. Dave heard about the Spanish words for people with bad teeth.    Dude, Did You Hear?   Andy feels like the name Boaty McBoatface is grossly misused. A tragedy that cuts deeper than any undersea trench.  IBM’s Watson AI became everything we hate about youtube comments within 10 minutes of being plugged into Urban Dictionary.  Stone Brewery introduces a new beer called Full Circle. Dave wants to call it Poo Brew... from sewer to table.  Andy heard about a dude who found a diamond in the rough (no, it wasn't Aladdin). That is, if rough means walking around a park in Arkansas and finding giant diamonds lying around.  Dave exposes the network that first aired nudity ever on tv. And no, it’s not HBO. Brought to you by listeners like you.   Sword Watch 2017 returns AGAIN! This time… it’s Morphin’ Time. Mighty Morphin' Murder Rangers! Make it stop, we beg you! Apparently your phone knows who you are by the way you walk. As if there weren’t enough ways for it to know. MORE INPUT! Andy brings news of Operation Wine and Cheese, the organized crime sting operation with the most refined palette ever. The moldier, the better.    We Recommend:   Dave recommends Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Hugo on Netflix. Andy recommends The Night Manager which is currently streaming on Amazon.   We Don't Recommend:   False-starting at the ancient Olympics. Unless you like your back-meat flayed off. Also, trying to steal a car if you don’t know how to drive a stick. As stated before... jumping into crocodile-infested waters. Even after 10 cups of goon. Or for a hot girl. Shaq and a bunch of NBA players think the Earth is flat. Time to change that one-and-done rule in the NCAA! Dave answers the question of if he would rather fight 100 duck-sized horses or one horse-sized duck. Spoiler alert, Andy disagrees.

    Great American Beer History!

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2017 17:31


    Dave and Andy are back with another edition of Dude, Did You Know, where we take the time to dive deep on a subject so that you can hopefully learn something rad!    In this edition, Andy brings to us Great Moments in American Beer History:   We break down the oldest active breweries in America that you probably know about. That’s right, the can in your hand probably has more history than you realize!   Beer has been part of the “New World” before America, from Native Americans to new settlers on the continent.    The first public brewery in America witnessed the birth of the first American child on its premises. That child grew up to be the first brewer born in America. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree... because it's gonna be used in a hard cider.     The oldest tavern in America has a 2.5-star rating on Yelp and sounds like no fun at all. It's as much fun as the powdered wig parties it used to host.   Our founding fathers have long been interested in beer, from homebrewing to trying to install a National Secretary of Beer. But instead, America later decided to outlaw alcohol for 13 years. What were we supposed to do, drink tea?   In the 1980s, a drunk goat was elected mayor of a town in Texas.d Gary Busey is rumored to be in talks to play the goat in an upcoming biopic.   America spends more money on beer than Ukraine and 130 other countries spend on literally everything. 

    Ep 7- Danish Digs, Drunken Debates, Dune, and… Dude, Logan

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2017 50:48


    In Episode 7, Luke Skywalker has disappeared and the First Order has risen out of the dust of the Galactic Empire. What’s that? This isn’t Star Wars? This is Dude, Did You Hear? Oh, ok. In this episode, we discover we may be in a simulation, one made by crazy intelligent beings. A simulation with SWORD WATCH 2017 PT II! A simulated world where kids are finding WWII planes in their backyards and lawyers pants are literally on fire.  Plus the dudes dive into Logan and Kong: Skull Island (and their opinions) to prepare you for your weekend at the movies.  Dave and Andy are drinking Sapporo and Pacifico (in cans!). ——————————————————————————————————— Dude, Did Your Hear? The ancient Persians debated things twice. Once while sober. Once while drunk. Debate class must have been a riot. It wasn’t money burning a whole in this lawyer’s pockets. His pants caught on fire during an arson trial, giving new meaning to “liar, liar, pants on fire.” Neil De Grasse Tyson thinks it’s a coin flip for whether we’re currently living in a computer simulation. Upon further review, Andy and Dave decide to take the blue pill. They just don’t want to be hassled.  The Vikings stadium is killing a record number of birds. Not the Falcons, Eagles, or the Cardinals. Birds that don’t know the difference between 4-3, 3-4, and large structures impeding their flight path.  The Return of Sword Watch 2017! Plus a LINK! A kid overachieves on his WWII history report. By a lot. (Bullwhip, Leather Jacket, and Fedora not included) Dave and Andy debate Kong: Skull Island – Dave can’t switch his brain off, Andy can. Somebody liked it, you’ll never guess who. Logan is an action movie masterpiece. GO SEE IT. RIGHT NOW! But leave the kids and faint-hearted friends at home. Seriously, you better be reading this in line at the theater.   We Recommend: Drinking coffee black and gives tips on how to get there. Like a bowel movement, Andy and Dave enjoy their coffee dark, smooth, and oily.  Bringing a book. Unless you can’t read. It’s good for your brain... And society.   We Don’t Recommend: Having no real relationships.  Dune? Don’t. Patrick Stewart has a weird mullet, Sting is gyrating in a loincloth and, unless you studied, you won’t make it through the first act.  Dave also doesn’t recommend selfies. Or killfies. Or people who use the word killfie.

    Assassins! ...and 6 Crazy Assassinations

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2017 14:37


    The OG Assassins. A group of Islamic druggies, followers of a mystic old man in the mountains, or really cool guys in hoods that jump off of high structures into hay bails? Whoever they were, the Hashashin couldn’t sneak their past the Mongols forever.    6 Wild Assassinations: Gustav III found out he could run but couldn’t hide. Literally.  The sharpest part of John Wilkes Booth came in the form of his spurs. Which spurred his capture.   Tiberius Gracchus (Jr.) found out what WWF wrestlers have known for years- chairs suck.    Rasputin manages to stay afloat a lot longer than most. Well, until he drown.    Georgi Markov got stuck at a bus stop. He died a few days later.   Kim Jong Nam found out that if you’re related to Kim Jong Un, there’s never a good time to LOL.

    Ep 6- Pineapples, Pets, Polymachus, and The People v. OJ

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2017 53:38


    In episode six, we examine society and hilarity ensues. Cats are drunk, people are wielding swords, the literal Nutty Professor proposes goat testicles as the cure for everything, and the President of Iceland wants to ban pineapples.   So strap in, cause we’re in for a crazy ride... But not one that will kill you, (although, Dave will tell you about one that will) - one that will make you laugh and marvel at the ridiculous world we live in.   We’re drinking Beer Run IPA from Ninkasi Brewing and Red Stripe Jamaican Lager   Dude, Did You Hear?   Alexander the Great hosted an Olympics. But since no one knew how to sport, they just got hammered instead.    Someone designed a roller coaster that will literally kill you. Because some people might want to ensure they go out in style. And because nothing makes population control seem fun like loop-de-loops.   Spotify releases the top songs to have sex to. And it turns out Australia is into getting down to some out of this world tunes…   Speaking of “out of this world,” scientists make a big discovery of the exo-planetary kind.   People start going to happy hour with their cats and the rest of us facepalm while we ponder the future of society.   Sword Watch 2017 is now officially underway.    Andy and Dave get excited about what it would look like if modern day US Marines fought the Roman Empire. Please make this happen Hollywood. We Recommend:   Carrying a pocket knife. Whether it's fending off wino cats or opening a bottle of Pinot in the desert, you need a pocket knife. DO IT. BE PREPARED.   “Man of the People” from the Reply All podcast. This story contains goat testicles. That should be enough for you.   Developing UPenn's key to the ultimate secret of success. Rooster Cogburn would approve.   American Crime Story: The People vs. O.J. Simpson. Because we all need a refresher on the craziness that was that trial. Get on it Netflixers!   Dave has begun his journey through the AFI’s top 100 movies of all time. He recommends you do the same. We Don't Recommend: Paying your employees too much money. LISTEN UP GOOGLE!   Dave doesn't feel the pull to the Light Phone. Which is basically the e-cigarette of smartphones. Use self-control like a real person.   Lying to beer snobs (even in Ohio). Because they will find you. And they will sue you.   Dave and Andy go valiantly to the defense of pineapple on pizza. Because it’s delicious. SCREW YOU, ICELAND.   Dave and Andy predict that Jason Segel will eat someone’s face.   Stick Around while Sir Patrick Stewart and his crew receive a distress signal from an underground Icelandic group of pineapple lovers. We uncovered a very special "Captain's Log" in honor of his upcoming poop emoji role. 

    The History of Rock, Paper, Scissors

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2017 11:36


    The History of Rock, Paper, Scissors + Nine Tips to Become a Master   Dude, did you hear? We’re introducing a new segment that will air between our regular episodes. In this segment, we dive deep on a topic we think will help expand your knowledge, improve on something develop a skill in some way. We call it – “Dude, Did You know?”   In this kick-off segment, Andy dives into the history of Rock, Paper Scissors – the simplest, most ubiquitous strategic game on earth, whose origins are shrouded in the mists of time.    Andy also brings you nine tips on how to master the game of Rock, Paper Scissors. Now when you play your friends, you too can say: “We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but the learner; now I am the master.”   For instance, dudes usually throw rock, dudettes usually throw scissors, and people in glass houses usually throw stones (wait that’s not a part of this…)   Dave and Andy also get mathematical and start dealing with imaginary numbers. Which are like your imaginary friends but actually exist in math and somehow mean something.    We hope these segments help tide you over until the next time we let you know what we heard! 

    Ep 5- Bird Armies, Brain Bugs, Bellringers, and Blue Jet Lightning

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 19, 2017 56:02


    Episode V: AI Strikes Back.   It is a dark time for DDYH, as we find ourselves in a world run by deviously intelligent, possibly malevolent AI. Aliens call out, leave a voicemail, and no one listens to it. Birds can ride in coach on your next Etihad flight.   So start your car or grab a beer, (But don’t do both) and hang out with us, just like the Worcester bellringer who got his bell rung.    Dave is drinking Ballast Point’s Tongue Buckler Imperial Red Ale and Andy is drinking Mother Earth’s Boo Koo IPA. We do our best to not get wasted by our 22 oz tasty beverages.    CHECK OUT FEBRUARY’S MIX TAPE IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY   Dude, Did Your Hear?   AI can now lie to your face, just like the kids who bailed on your high school science project.    The next time something gets stuck in your head, it may not be a song. It’s probably a cockroach. If you live in India.   Metallic Hydrogen. It’s no Ambimetic Polyalloy from Terminator 2, but it’ll get the job done. Why? Because interstellar travel made easy, that’s why.   Blue Jet Lightning. It shoots up to 30 miles in the air! Almost as high as people’s blood pressure in Facebook politics! Check it out.   The WOW! signal, 6EQUJ5 was caught by radio telescope on a narrowband frequency in August, 1977. Even 40 years later there’s still no confirmed explanation for its origin.   You want to bring 80 of your pet falcons on the plane with you? Sure! Just don’t let them get torn apart by Tom Brady.    UNU’s Swarm AI successfully predicted the Super Bowl score prior to the game. SPOILER ALERT! 34-28 Patriots. It’s been right about the Kentucky Derby and the last two Stanley Cup winners as well… and wrong on just about everything else.    We Recommend:   Losing hair? Andy has a solution for you.    The Life/After podcast from GE. Starting with "The Message." Available on iTunes.   SO YUMMY COCA-COLA PLUS! SO YUMMY! SO YUMMY! COCA-COLA PLUS!   Simon Sinek’s "Leaders Eat Last." You need to read it, or listen to it, or cheat off your friend who did when we give out the test.   UConn will destroy you. At least, their Women’s Basketball team will.    We Don’t Recommend:   Stealing from Salvation Army donation bins.    Scrolling through your phone near bedtime. Kiss that melatonin goodbye.   In Worcester a bellringer gets his bell rung. 

    Ep 4- Sherlock, Split, Sneaky Pete, and Sir Patrick Stewart

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 3, 2017 48:35


    In Episode 4 we find ourselves reading science fiction horror that’s actually real! A real Temple of Doom, Chimera, and January movies! Horror like you never imagined is ever so real. It’ll all be ok, though. So take a wrap off and grab one of the delicious IPAs we’re drinking and enjoy a super chill, fun ride down the river of random knowledge.    (Be warned, we do mention the names of several presidents in an entirely non-political way. There is a trigger alert alarm included for the safety of our listeners)    We're drinking Coronado Brewing Company’s North Island IPA and Knee Deep Brewing Company's Lupulin River Imperial Indian Pale Ale (be careful, Imperial IPA is usually over 10% alcohol and WILL mess you up, like it did Dave... probably because he has weak genes).   Man-Bear-Pig is coming. Well, at least the slightly less disturbing Man-Pig Chimera is coming.    Indiana Jones might even get the heebie jeebies at the Temple of the Monkey God. A real Temple of Doom that was abandoned 500 years ago because it was believed to be cursed.    Universal is bringing you what exactly what you never wanted! A monsters universe! That’s right, a shared universe that will include surefire hits like Godzilla vs. King Kong! A movie projected for release in 2019. Dave and Andy admit they love the Creature from the Black Lagoon.    Is it possible to kill yourself with caffeine? Can you survive the “lethal dose?” Parents test the limits every day... or do they?   Did you hear? An acoustically perfect concert hall has finally been built. In Germany. Empty your life savings, it’s time to take a trip.   The emoji movie is coming soon. So is Sir Patrick Stewart’s shakespearian method performance as the poop emoji.    We Recommend:   Sneaky Pete, a new show that feels like a fusion of The Americans and Justified.   An older podcast you probably missed called Limetown.    Getting back in the gym. Do some cardio, lift some weights, go swimming. Find something to get those healthy endorphins going again. You won’t regret it. Successful business owners and recent Presidents all make time for it, and you can to. Whether you like them or not, they all make time to get in some exercise. It’ll help you feel better about life!   We Don’t Recommend:   Season 4 of Sherlock. Don’t get us wrong, we love the show with Martin Freeman and Benedict Cumberpatch, but its most recent season didn’t quite cut it.    The recently released movie, Split. A January movie that’s as lazy as the rest of them. It’s a B movie at best, with an ending that will make you laugh… and not in a good way. We also don’t recommend any January movie. You’re better off throwing that movie ticket money in the trash.   The 3 marketing campaigns you probably never heard about.   Next time that tornado strikes, don’t use your bathtub. A lucky lady just stole your shot at surviving in her accidentally aerodynamic tub.

    Ep 3- MaxMind, Mysteries, Museums, and the Man in the High Castle

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2017 55:13


    Welcome to the Dude, Did You Hear? Extended Edition! Now with 400% more Smeagol! Which is still 0%. Because multiplication.   In our third episode, we find ourselves farther down the road, on the other side of the dimensional portal. We’ve found a world immersed in techno-horror, shocking mysteries, and a Dude, Did You Hear in Russia so terrifying, we can’t talk about it here! Don’t forget HAL’s birthday! it already passed… just tell him his card’s in the mail.    We’re drinking Belching Beaver’s Me So Honey and Stone Brewing’s classic, Arrogant Bastard.   Dude, Did You Hear?:   MaxMind brings techno horror beyond imagination with IP mapping.    George Lucas is finally building his museum of art. It’s “not just Star Wars,” according to George.   Shower Beer is the conditioner that could change your life. One shattered glass at a time. MY FEET!!!   Chilean Military Helicopter pilots encounter a phenomenon they can’t explain. Luckily they got it on their file FLIR footage. Two years later they finally share the footage with the world. What they saw, no one can explain. Proving aliens aren’t just crossing American borders.    In Taiwan, exotic funerals have become the wave of the future.    Dyatlov Pass, a blast from the past where survivors can’t last! The unsolved mystery that will ensure you don’t go camping on open snowbound mountainous terrain in Russia ever again.    Africa is pulling an Escape from LA and breaking apart, slowly. Minus John Carpenter and Snake Plissken. But still with the eyepatches, because, ya know… pirates. In a million years, maybe they’ll have Steve Buscemi, too.    We Recommend:   The Man in the High Castle should be one your radar, watch list, favorites, all of it! America has lost the war, Nazis and Imperial Japan run the country. Things are not as they seem in 1960s occupied America, though. The performance from the arch-nemesis will have you coming back over and over, he’s a terrifying menace you’ll want to run to the neutral territories to hide from. Dave and Andy recommend unequivocally!   The reverse wine snob wants to invert the way you look at wine. Your wallet will burst at the seams with savings!   Help us save the Five dollar bills… from extinction outside your wallet. Save with Dave and see how much you have when we check in next January.   Somm will change the way you see the guy recommending wines at that fancy joint you like so much. Sommeliers have one of the most difficult tests to pass in the world. One with an extremely low pass rate- one of the lowest in the world.    We Don’t Recommend:   Pointing guns at your mouth. For any reason. Ever. How is that not clear to some people?  (What the Eff David Blaine?) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYxu_MQSTTY   Hiring copycats to design your logo. Harry Potter and the Dodgers could not be reached for comment at press time.    New Year’s Resolutions. Unless you have a plan. A SMART plan. With SMART goals. We’re talking Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic/Relevant, and Time-Based. Have a plan, or don’t. There’s always next year.    AND FINALLY   We talk tech. The nightmare that it could be, the convenience (nuisance?) that it is. What it could be in the future, and how you can get on the field soon at your favorite NFL games. Virtually, of course. Hold off on that camcorder, Uncle Rico.    There’s also a special public radio message from our hipster friends!

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