#AutisticAF Out Loud

Cold Open (into silence)You love Dune? Like me?Frank Herbert is dead... wrong.Fear is NOT the mind-killer. Denial is.[Music ]IntroYou're listening to AutisticAF Out Loud. One voice. Raw. Real. Fiercely Neurodivergent. Since 1953.Season 5, Episode 5. Attacks on neurodivergence, facing our fears, finding our strength. Today we're talking threats, resistance, and the power of a hundred million voices. Just one autistic elder's truth. I'm Johnny Profane.Content Note: political violence, eugenics, genocide, institutionalized discrimination, systemic oppression + experiences & opinions of one autistic voice... in my 70s.[Music]You love Dune? Like me?Frank Herbert is dead... wrong.Fear is NOT the mind-killer. Denial is.I must honor my fear.Fear is my guardian. My junkyard dog. My screaming siren.Fear is the warning of annihilation. It must be heeded.I will embrace my fear. Then share its wisdom.I will let it flow through me. Become purpose & strength.And when we have acted? I will remember… its lessons.Where the Beast of Fear once stood, we will now stand.We will abide. Stronger for having feared… then acted… Together.Trust me. I know a lot about fear. I'm autistic. ADHD, too. In my 70s.Living in dangerous times in America. And we got a lot more to fear… than fear itself.[Music]Hey... you know how this works. If this resonates, now might be a good time to like, share… maybe text a link to a friend. Really helps get the word out.Trump administration identifies Autism & ADHD as "dire threats to the American people."Some folks called this headline hyperbole. Click-bait exaggeration. To my face. With hostility. Calling out what they see as “fear-mongering.”One fellow autist on LinkedIn really tore me a new one along those lines. Tried to anyways. I got a bit strong on her ass… So she blocked me. Exercising her denial.But this is how it starts.The White House labeled us a "dire threat." Not as evil actors, but based on our condition… our existence itself. Autism as a "dire threat." Not a difference.Then throwing out a gratuitous observation... “77% of young adults do not qualify for the military based in larger part on their health scores.” (Full Whitehouse.gov post.)As if that is how America now measures the value of our lives. As cannon fodder. As if there aren't now… and haven't been throughout history… Neurodivergent warriors.Demonizing all the disabled. All the Different. As if we are the ones destroying America.I'm struggling. I'm terrified...Even knowing that cruel terror is their purpose. Didn't help watching Man in the High Castle lately. The scene where ashes are falling because they're cremating the old and defective...I'm toast.About 1:43 in the YouTube linked in text.{video clip in text}This terror? Not just my personal problem. We neurodivergents ain't a small marginalized group. The numbers tell a bigger story:* About 30 million Americans have direct family ties to an autistic person* Roughly another 30 million have cousins or close relatives who are autistic* 60 million. That's 1 in 6 Americans with close autistic connectionsBut we're just getting started. Add in ADHD, even accounting for overlap between conditions, the numbers become staggering:* 69 million Americans have immediate family members affected* 75 million have extended family affected* Nearly 1 in 4 American families impactedWithout considering the millions of families affected by other disabilities.All these figures are back of the envelope. Conservative estimates from current prevalence rates. No formal research exists yet on these numbers. But the truth is clear…We're talking 1 in 4 American families?Let that sink in.When do we stop seeing these numbers as statistics? And start seeing the faces of neighbors. Your friends. Your loved ones?When are we ready to stand together?Even if they don't round us all up right away…They're already killing education programs. For Autism, ADHD, intellectual disability, speech, hearing, vision, physical disabilities…Personally I'm secretly pleased to see torturous ABA-based programs unfunded. Applied Behavioral Analysis forces change on helpless autistic children. Screw that noise.But caring parents across the nation? They want support for their kids. They're showing up at Town Halls. Getting loud about these recent cuts. Expressing fear and anger. Hurting kids cuts deep. And wide.Worse yet? Over 80% of us autistics are unemployed or underemployed. Think about it. That means killing our Medicaid, Medicare, Social Security, Food Stamps, Housing, etc.That's institutionalized Economic violence. A soft means of killing us off. And Soft Genocide is the deadliest kind. It goes unnoticed. Unmourned.But, hey, it's not only lost benefits I'm worried about.Underlying many of Trump's policies?Turn over a rock on most? You'll find the sinister grin of “Eugenics” staring up at you. That debunked, unscientific program to improve human “breeding stock.” By terminating the reproduction of “Undesirables.”By any means necessary. Isolation, deportation, starvation, illness, violence, death. Just like Nazi Germany, against all disabilities. Libertarian Survival of the Fittest. At its finest.Ayn Rand would be so proud. “Meritocracy” my ass…Denial begins with dismissal. Violence begins with hate speech.Notice the subtle, insidious damage done here. Labeling neurodivergence and other differences as "dire threats." That may be the most dangerous aspect of this White House publication.Like they weaponized Disability, Equity & Inclusion (DEI) through propaganda.It's how it starts. The slow slide to genocide. We've seen this before. The marginalization of minorities."Do you want a BLIND person at the FAA?“Would you trust a PARALYZED person holding your life in their hands?""Do you see a WOMAN on the front lines… defending you? A transgender?”"How about an IMMIGRANT raping your daughter?”Mockery becomes hate speech.Becomes mass hatred.Becomes normalized violence.It's right there in the authoritarian… even Fascist… playbook. Now? It's The American Way.First, we're other.Then, we're less than human.A burden.A danger.Finally…A targetFor violence.And hate crimes against Americans with disabilities have risen 29.5% over the last five years. As American political discourse has darkened.See what I mean?Can we turn our horror into action?The very point of these propaganda tactics is terror.Threatening humans' income, medical care, housing… lives? That's terrorism.How can we possibly fight our fear becoming terror?This may encourage you. The sheer number of American families. Who are seeing their loved ones threatened.A 100 million... or more... affected American disabled families? I believe we can raise a decent reaction. If we act together.I've proven over and over again in my life I'm no leader. Executive functioning? Hell, I struggle to find topic sentences. Decisions over local action, political organization, resistance demonstrations? Beyond me.So I'm not about to create some Neurodivergent Justice League or anything.But one thing that someone like me can do? That is positive? Put a human face on suffering. Without spinning toxic positivity.You may disagree. I understand. Nevertheless?I have value. And this warning has merit. It can gather a crowd. Maybe more capable folks who can run with it.YET… There are 4 things we can do right now to effect change:* Share this warning. With friends. With government representatives. Make it visible. Make it heard.* Join the conversation below in comments. Your story matters. Your voice counts.* Connect with organizations already fighting this fight. They need our numbers. And maybe most important…* Create a mutual support network. Might be neighbors who check in with each other. Or more… shared travel, shopping together, mutual defense. A small community of choice.Fear is not the enemy…Fear is the Dance of Shiva, baby. When that Hindu god becomes the “Destroyer of Worlds" in the famous Oppenheimer quote. His flashing feet destroying the illusion of denial.Invoking a new creation.Feel your fear.Ride it.DO somethingWith its strength.Together, maybe… just may be...We can destroy ignorance. Make something… new.We must honor our fear.Then act. Together.OutroIn coming weeks, we'll challenge the medical model of autism, with an episode called, "CBT...? Never Worked for Autistic Me." Why? Part of a series on how neurodivergent individuals can build sustainable, authentic lives - with or without professional intervention.AutisticAF Out Loud podcast is supported solely by listeners like you. Know a friend or family member with a sincere interest in neurodiversity? Please consider emailing this episode to them.We believe no one should have to pay to be autistic. Many neurodivergent people can't afford subscription content.Your Ko-Fi tip of any amount helps keep this resource free for them.Or join our paid subscriber community at johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com for ongoing support. Link in description.#AutisticAF Out Loud Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts enjoy a free subscription. To support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/subscribe

Cold OpenI was not born to be pitied. I was born to raise Hell. Autistic style.IntroYou're listening to AutisticAF Out Loud. One voice. Raw. Real. Fiercely Neurodivergent. Since 1953.Season 5, Episode 4. Breaking mirrors, dancing at the edge of noise, raising autistic hell. Autism, Neurodiversity, 3 Poems... and 3 Rando Manifestos. Just one autistic elder's truth. I'm Johnny Profane.Content Note: trauma, sexual assault, self-harm, rage, transformative therapy moments + experiences & opinions of one autistic voice… 71.[Music]1953.Manifesto #1I was Born Autistic. Not to be Fixed…I'm autistic. Born 1953.I was not a product of a vaccine.I was not a product of a disease. Mental or physical.I was not a mistake. Genetic or epigenetic.I was not born to be fixed by CBT, pill or chip.I was not born to be pitied.I was born to raise Hell. Autistic style.[Music]The static never stops.Poem #1Dancing Close to the Edge of the Noise#AskingAuDHDists…bear with me a minute.I'm autistic+ADHD.71.i feel likea brilliant creative soulas if…trapped in a damaged body& neurologytrying to communicatewith the worldthrough an intermittentlyshort-circuiting transistor radioplaying through static& the distortion& sparking circuits…to just be heard.do you understand at all what I mean?#ActuallyAutistic #ADHD #ReallyAuDHD[Music]Sometimes? The mask slips…Poem #2AFTER THE SECRETI have strengths.Not one is my superpower.I have challenges.Not one is my kryptonite.I'm that kid in third gradeDrop drop DroppingA mysterious blue crystalInto that test tube—Squealing in delightEvery time it explodes…In purple streams.I love cosplay.But I don't have to flyWear a maskOr sport a capeTo be autistic.Still…I get to be the heroor bald evil geniusof my own life.[Music]Neurodivergent life… twists different.Manifesto #2My Autistic Life: Mebbe a Little Zelig. Mebbe a Bit Forest Gump. But All Me.Sharing our Neurodivergent stories is powerful.I was born before autism was invented… More or less. 1953.Been a meditation teacher,cult member,magazine publisher,ad agency owner,non-profit activist,3-time grad student3-time husband,homeless,mental health counselor,substance abuse counselor,cult counselor,homeless,fast-food clerk,Pretend Rock Star,homeless…I've bantered with Bill Gates.Felt stupid in front of Bill Joy.Touched the Maharishi.Stumbled on Keith HaringJumping turnstiles in the subway…But…I met anonymous geniusesin cubicles,bull penstrailer parks,on the street…This is not my idle boast. This is my earnest promise. Ask the neurodivergent in front of you…Have they got stories to tell you. Genius touches every life. Of every 'type. If you can perceive it.So.I have no credentials to offer. At least none that matters to me... anymore.So I offer my life. My autistic life. Hoping better for our kids.Because if nothing changes…Content Note: Discussion of trauma statistics and sexual assaultOver 80% of them will experience trauma in their life. Interpersonal violence, bullying, sensory trauma, emotional abuse, and systemic discrimination. Nearly three times higher than average. And many autistic individuals experience multiple types of trauma concurrently.Just as I did in the 1950s. Bullying by classmates & teachers. Physical attacks on the playgrounds. Sexual attack in the park. And in the home,Trauma not from neurodivergence. Trauma from how modern society treats the neurodivergent.[Music]That clean, polite, clinical phrase… “trauma?” It has a personal face, a personal moment in every neurodivergent life.This is mine.Session #137. When memory breaks.Poem #3The Body Abides"Like I told youNothing really happenedCan't sleep is all…."He repeats his view,"The body watches.The body ALWAYSFucking watches.""Yeah, he kissed meFathers do that.Yeah, it was weird but…."He whispers me,"Your body, your witness.And this witness ALWAYSFucking watches."Then he leans in…"What if he'd kissedyour sister's lips…?""I'd fucking kill him."That's when…i see mein his mirrorwatching myselfwatch my selftransparently autistica son no more,yet the body…abides.ragedark rageScreaming RAGEi'd fucking kill himfucking kill himkill himHim.i rise…soslowlyand fucking smash that mirrori rock, i sway…i rub one red eye.i stand, I stare…I sigh, I say,"My body watchesThe body ALWAYSFucking watches…,"As I close his office door…I abide.[Music]Decades later. Still raising hell.Manifesto #3Now… About That Autistic Hell We Was Talking about Raising…We ask awkward questions. And find new answers.We see different. Make electrifying connections.We feel patterns. To larger truths.We are passionateWe adapt.Survive.Disrupt.Transform…Raising a fat middle fingerTo normal.Now, that's the kinda hell… I'm talking about raising.How's about neurodivergent you?One last thing…be proud.be proud you're autistic.be proud you're alive.despite everything people and nature...life...threw at you...you're still breathing.you're still breathing…no mean feat that. I know firsthand.be proud.be damn proud.#ActuallyAutisticOutroIn coming weeks, we'll challenge the medical model of autism, examining how neurodivergent individuals can build sustainable, authentic lives - with or without professional intervention.AutisticAF Out Loud podcast is supported solely by listeners like you. Know a friend or family member with a sincere interest in neurodiversity? Please consider emailing this episode to them.We believe no one should have to pay to be autistic. Many neurodivergent people can't afford subscription content. Your Ko-Fi tip of any amount helps keep this resource free for them. Or join our paid subscriber community at johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com for ongoing support. Link in description.Written in rage. Published in hope. December 2024. Greene County, Indiana.To give a one-time tip to support this work: https://ko-fi.com/autisticafTo offer ongoing support for my work, please consider becoming a paid subscriber…#AutisticAF Out Loud Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts enjoy a free subscription. To support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/subscribe

Full podcast with links to available poster artwork: https://johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/p/podcast-every-clock-is-a-handgun-2ee Sensory-Friendly Discussion & Summary: https://notebooklm.google.com/notebook/30720fb4-dab4-48b9-873f-90ec1ac03b88/audio Transcript: Autistic Spoken Word: Every Clock Is a Handgun Pointed at My Head This spoken word on my autistic experience of time contains triggering topics. If you are sensitive to frank discussion of abuse, I created a sensory-friendly audio summary. Link in description (https://notebooklm.google.com/notebook/30720fb4-dab4-48b9-873f-90ec1ac03b88/audio) Every clock is a handgun pointed at my head THREE Every clock is a handgun pointed at my head Every tick, tick… fucking tick Tolling Fear, Doom… dread Click. Slide. Cock… click. Every night a mantra echoes through my head TV static… a crazy-making hum Singing Dream, Drempt… dead… Not done. Not done. Not done… undone. 10, 9, 8… Dread 7, 6, 5… Fear 4, 3, 2… BEEP. Shoot the moon… or the country next door Countdown. Deadline. Bow down… dead. Bound behind doors, bound in my head Pace, paces, pacing… paced Every BEEP. Of the phone. Stops… my heart. . . . I crash out with a scream for escape TWO Woods Deep woods Deepest woods My ears fly from bird song to bird song. A raptor circles then spirals Crossing lines now dead Wind steals my breath Taking words never said This skin bag of atmosphere Breathes new air When the sun rises First it is cool Then it gets warm The day passes Clouds above my head. Shaped by wind Outside my body The same wind Inside my body The same wind Yet… ONE 10, 9, 8… Dread 7, 6, 5… Fear 4, 3, 2… BEEP. Shoot the moon… or the country next door Countdown. Deadline. Bow down… dead. Every clock is a handgun pointed at my head ZERO This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/subscribe

Hey! I'm Johnny Profane… back after a 6-month bout of the "shys" to launch Season 5 of AutisticAF Out Loud. Missed you guys… But I'm here now, at least for the moment... Let's do something great with that moment, shall we?This seems like the perfect occasion to talk about Time… and how it passes. A crucial topic… whether you're autistic or ADHD, wonder if you are, have kids or a loved one, work with some, or work to support us…I want to give you my experience of autistic time. Which is not chained to clocks or calendars. And different enough from what most folks expect… that I've struggled for two years… just to use my words. So I've turned to art. Which is both adult and intense at points…Some of the images are available as posters. And stick around to the end for a special AI-generated treat. Google's NotebookLM creates a lively dialogue between two AI commentators to break down the key ideas… especially for non-autistics. It's like having digital study buddies to help process all this time-bending stuff!Every clock is a handgun pointed at my headIIIEvery clock is a handgun pointed at my headEvery tick, tick… fucking tickTolling Fear, Doom… dreadClick. Slide. Cock… click.Every night a mantra echoes through my headTV static… a crazy-making humSinging Dream, Drempt… dead…Not done. Not done. Not done… undone.10, 9, 8… Dread7, 6, 5… Fear4, 3, 2… BEEP.Shoot the moon… or the country next doorCountdown. Deadline. Bow down… dead.Bound behind doors, bound in my headPace, paces, pacing… pacedEvery BEEP.Of the phone.Stops…my heart. . . . I crash out with a scream for escapeIIWoodsDeep woodsDeepest woodsMy ears flyfrom bird songto bird song.A raptor circles then spiralsCrossing lines now deadWind steals my breathTaking words never saidThis skin bag of atmosphereBreathes new airWhen the sun risesFirst it is coolThen it gets warmThe day passesClouds above my head.Shaped by windOutside my bodyThe same windInside my bodyThesamewindYet…I10, 9, 8… Dread7, 6, 5… Fear4, 3, 2… BEEP.Shoot the moon… or the country next doorCountdown. Deadline. Bow down… dead.Every clock is a handgun pointed at my headzeroThe Māori must be a wise people. They really get autistic time.Or at least, Keri Opai did back in 2017. That's when he coined their new dictionary entry for autism, Takiwātanga, “in his or her own time and space.”Keri is an author, educator, and social activist. He certainly knew of the Western Medical Model of autism. But… it seems, Keri's childhood pal, Peter, was autistic. So Keri just could not bring himself to define us as broken.No medical pathology in Keri's words. No disabling pity. Rather, respect. Even admiration…He, and his people, saw what many of us feel. Our deep connection with natural rhythms. Our walk through the world at our own pace. On our own path. Maybe in our own dimensions of time & space.Takiwātanga. A dictionary definition born out of love. It captures the heart of my autistic life — a different walk through time and space.Reflecting on Keri's compassionate wisdom… My guess is that the Māoris, at least, are glad we're on the planet. Not because of our needs. Because of our contributions. Rooted in our different perceptions, our outsider experiences.Let's dive deeper into Māoris, autism, and our journey through time perception. After this quick word, got bills to pay…[ad]This podcast is supported solely by listeners like you. We believe no one should have to pay to be autistic. Which is why we offer all our autistic information for free. To ensure this resource remains available for those who can't afford it, consider choosing a paid subscription at johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com. Link in the description.So, maybe the Māoris offer the understanding we autistics need. But Western science still struggles to catch up. Their “Autistic Spectrum”? A laundry list of supposed problems… like “Time Blindness.” Only a problem from an ableist point of view. In an industrialist society.Problems that might be strengths in a different time, a different place.Try as I might, I could never measure my time by checking off boxes under “Goals Met.” Like how many widgets I punch out each hour. Which has nothing to do with my quality of life... which is very much wrapped up in the joy of my process.Why do I want to make you feel how I experience time as an autistic person? How can we understand each other... care for each other... if we don't explore each other?Why do I use art? Because research trends and terms change with the times... like all things human made. I could wave my hands and quote “neuroplasticity” & “quantum effects” all day and into the night. But that would negate my words in a few years. When the whole research paradigm changes… yet again.But raw human experience endures. So… I offer you poetry. So… I offer you images.So… I welcome you into my world.#AutisticAF Out Loud Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. To leave a one-time tip of any amount, please visit Ko-Fi.Right up front, every time…We autistics are not all the same.Example: Most folks know autistic kids and adults may have sensory differences. What most don't know? Some of us are not overwhelmed by loud noise, bright lights, big crowds.Some of us are exhilarated… by them.And some… like me… experience a bit of both…So then, what do we share in common as autists? An UN-common sensitivity and reaction to extreme sensory input. Yet, we respond in individual ways… because we've lived different lives.Keep that in mind as I discuss my personal experiences of time, memory… thought. Both research and personal stories show we autists experience time in ways uncommon for most humans.But each of us experiences time differently. Even as polar opposites.In My Autistic TimeWant me for dinner? I may bust a gut to please you. AND yet…I'll end up mumbling some variation of “I have no freaking clue how so much time could have passed... um, again.”But get me focused… particularly on my passions… writing or music?I effortlessly monitor… fractions of a second...To hit precisely…The right hesitation… of that one… musical note.Or the perfect combo… of word choice… and white space…That.Makes…The phrase.Now, weirdly, any period much longer than a day? All kinda melts together. I can forget to send in a vital Social Security form, thinking, “I just got it yesterday. I still got time…” Weeks later. Months later. Too much later…Or I might pick up a convo in mid-sentence when I see a friend. From the last time I saw him. Which coulda been two jobs… and a career or so... ago.Like I have one button on my clock, “NOW.” And for bonus points, its alarm function has no mega-freaking clue… How long it takes to complete any task invented by any human.At any time in history.Or any space we've ever occupied."Sure, hon, I'll make dinner tonight! That fake rice-a-roni I make takes 14 minutes to boil. I'll see ya in about 20.” One annoyed emoji and an hour later…

An Example of Exclusive Subscriber Content… Raw, Real, Authentic.I'm letting my one austic voice do all the talking this time. I kinda like that.AutisticAF Out Loud - One Autistic Voice. Hmm…Here's my first thank you. My first real attempt at being live on camera. It's an autistic thing. No mask. No cosplay. I explain after you hit the button….Anyway, this one's for you. All the subscribers. You were here before I had the spoons to make it happen.Now that I'm on the mend, I intend to make the most of subStack for you.Promise.-Johnny Get full access to #AutisticAF Out Loud Newsletter at johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/subscribe

Shattering Neurodivergent Stereotypes: A Raw Dialogue for Tomorrow's Generations Description: Embark on a transformative journey with Johnny Profane in this compelling episode of AutisticAF Out Loud, titled "Actually Autistic? Whatever Doesn't Kill Your Unique Neurodivergent Ass…". This conversation goes beyond dismantling societal myths and stereotypes about neurodivergence; it's a call to action for creating a more understanding and inclusive culture for neurodivergent children and future generations. Beyond the Success Myth: Delve into the often overlooked struggles against poverty and trauma, as Johnny shares insights from his own life, challenging the glossy narratives that dominate mainstream discussions about neurodivergence. Debunking Harmful Ideologies: This episode takes a critical stance against toxic positivity and the misleading belief that adversity naturally breeds strength, offering a more nuanced view of the neurodivergent experience. The Truth About Disability: Moving past the inspirational narrative, Johnny discusses the real, day-to-day challenges faced by neurodivergent individuals, debunking myths of hidden superpowers in favor of a more grounded understanding. Critiquing Consumer Culture: Explore how consumer culture perpetuates dissatisfaction and alienation, particularly affecting those who feel marginalized, and discuss the importance of fostering a culture that values individuals for who they are, not what they consume. Valuing True Resilience: Celebrate the authentic resilience and strength within the neurodivergent community, recognizing the courage it takes to navigate a world that often seems indifferent or hostile to their needs. Crafting a Future of Inclusion: Highlighting the episode's closing message, Johnny Profane emphasizes the importance of building a supportive, inclusive culture that honors neurodivergent experiences. This isn't just about challenging stereotypes; it's about laying the groundwork for a world where neurodivergent children can grow up feeling valued, understood, and empowered. A Call to Create Change: Engage in this critical dialogue not just as listeners, but as active participants in shaping a more inclusive future. This episode is an invitation to everyone—parents, educators, allies—to join in the effort to ensure that the next generation of neurodivergent individuals inherits a culture that celebrates their unique contributions and supports their growth. Key Insights: Challenge and redefine the narratives surrounding neurodivergence and disability. Understand the damaging impact of societal expectations and toxic positivity on neurodivergent individuals. Acknowledge the real challenges and celebrate the genuine strengths within the neurodivergent community. Advocate for a shift towards a more inclusive, understanding culture that prepares a better world for neurodivergent children. Join the Movement: Dive deeper into the conversation about creating a supportive environment for neurodivergent individuals. Share your insights, experiences, and hopes for the future, contributing to a broader understanding and acceptance. Be part of the change that ensures a more inclusive world for neurodivergent children and future generations. Themes: Breaking Stereotypes, Authentic Experiences, Inclusive Future Tags: Neurodivergent Realities, Beyond Disability Myths, Toxic Positivity Critique, Future of Neurodiversity, Inclusive Culture Building, Empowering Neurodivergent Voices, Advocacy for Neurodivergent Children, Autism, Autistic, Actually Autistic, Autism Podcast, Autistic Podcast, Neurodivergent Podcast --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/autisticaf/message

Autistic Authenticity: Navigating Identity and Community Description: Dive into a candid conversation on AutisticAF Out Loud, where we tackle the often blurred lines between being autistic, belonging to identity groups, and maintaining personal integrity. "Autism? It's a State of Being. NOT an Identity Group" serves as a bold reminder that autism is an inherent part of us, not a badge to be worn or a club to join. Through this episode, we explore the delicate balance between finding community support and preserving our unique autistic identity. We question the constructs of identity groups, challenge the notion of toxic conformity, and celebrate the unapologetic expression of our autistic selves. Ideal for anyone touched by autism or intrigued by the diversity of human experience, this episode encourages a dialogue about authenticity, resilience, and the journey towards understanding our true selves within the vast spectrum of neurodiversity. Embracing Authenticity in Neurodiversity Unveiling the True Self Beyond Autism's Labels A dive into personal identity amidst the complexities of neurodiversity. The delicate balance between individuality and community expectations. Sharing a journey of self-awareness, challenging societal norms, and finding joy in authenticity. Do you see reflections of your own experiences? Join us as we navigate this personal voyage. Explore the Depths: A candid examination of autism as an innate aspect of existence, not a societal group. The transition from external pressures to genuine self-expression within the autistic spectrum. Discovering moments of genuine self-recognition and the simple pleasures of living authentically. Intrigued by the intricate details? Engage with us as we unravel these layers. Participate in the Dialogue: Connect with a narrative that questions mainstream perceptions and honors the diversity of neurodiversity. Contribute your insights and experiences as we delve into the nuances of authentic autistic living. Foster a conversation that broadens the understanding and acceptance of neurodiversity. Inspired by our collective journeys? Let your voice join in and enrich the discourse. Themes: Personal Identity Exploration, Neurodiversity Embrace, Authentic Living Tags: Autistic Personal Identity, Authentic Neurodiversity Experience, Autism Beyond Labels, Genuine Autistic Expression, Neurodiverse Individuality Insights, Rejecting Conformity in Autism, Celebrating Autistic Authenticity, Embracing Neurodiverse Narratives --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/autisticaf/message

Embracing Autism's Raw Truths in My 70s Description: Dive deep with Johnny Profane into a journey unlike any other—a raw, unfiltered exploration of living with autism discovered later in life. This episode peels back the layers of daily life, challenges, and the unexpected joys found in the simplest moments. "Facing the reality of autism in my 70s, I share the gritty process of acceptance, the quest for authentic self-expression, and those radiant sparks of joy that light up the path." If you're seeking a story of real-life resilience, unexpected turns, and the beauty of embracing your true self, join us. For everyone navigating the complex tapestry of neurodiversity, this conversation is for you. Let's delve into the heart of autism's challenges and triumphs—no holds barred. Embracing Autism in My 70s The awakening to autism's reality after 70 years of life. The gritty, day-to-day acceptance and the small, radiant joys of being truly oneself. A personal narrative of discovery, challenge, and the unexpected rewards found in authenticity. Feel a connection? Reflect on your journey as we delve into mine. Dive Deep to Discover: An unvarnished look at the late diagnosis and its profound impact. The journey from societal conformity to embracing a unique autistic identity. The moments of clarity and joy that illuminate the path of self-discovery. Curious about the nuances? Join me as we explore the layers. Join the Conversation: Engage with a story that challenges conventional narratives and celebrates the neurodiverse experience. Share your thoughts and stories as we explore the complexities of living authentically with autism. Support a dialogue that elevates understanding and acceptance of neurodiversity. Moved by our shared stories? Your voice can amplify the message. Themes: Authentic Self-Discovery, Neurodiversity Celebration, Late-Life Awakening Tags: Autism in Later Life, Late Diagnosis Autism Journey, Embracing Neurodiversity After 70, Authentic Autism Experience, Senior Autistic Self-Discovery, Neurodiverse Life Reflections, Gritty Autism Acceptance, Autistic Joy in Adulthood, Unfiltered Autistic Narrative, Neurodiversity Celebration Stories --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/autisticaf/message

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Perfectionism ain't working for me… maybe not for Autistic AF dot you, either. So here's something, shall we say, a little “rawer” than my usual /rant…Trascript: https://autisticaf.me/2023/09/29/this-autistics-fantasy-so-he-asks-about-my-history-what-i-told-my-doctor/#AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq Support the showSupport the show

Ever been told to ‘calm down'? How'd it feel? Well, this autistic feels like exploding!:https://autisticaf.me/2023/08/26/calm-down-why-is-this-the-worst-advice-you-can-give-an-autistic-person/#AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq Support the show

Folks ask about my #neurodivergent marriage.Umm… over and over. Like… “Is that even possible?”Gotta story for ya…Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2023/08/18/neurodivergent-kiss-autistic-fairytale-or-fabulous-marriage/#AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq Support the show

Season 3's mission? To boldly explore living authentically autistic... out loud. That first story? Carving out a safe space to be our true autistic selves... a big part of that quest.Support the show

 Season 3 of AutisticAF Out Loud starts off with 3 new stories: 1. Living Unmasked Is a Political Act 2. Autism, Love & My Friend Billy: A New Epic Myth 3. Faking Normal: How I Mask My Writing Disorder... to Bring You Autistic Joy Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2023/01/07/season-3-love-politics-faking-normal-3-new-autistic-myths/ "Hi! I'm still Johnny.I'm still Profane... AND I'm still here. Finally... Season 3 of Autistic as Fuck Out Loud! Why no episodes since Fall? Major burn out. Dog attack injuries. Coupla health scares. Some dark emotions. Exhaustion... Shut down for 3 months. Then woke up... So I'm declaring victory... and a new focus. How to live authentically autistic... out loud."#AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq 0:00 Intro 0:11 1. Living Unmasked Is a Political Act 1:14 Season 3: Living Autistic Authentically 2:32 2. Autism, Love & My Friend Billy: A New Epic Myth 10:02 3. Faking Normal: How I Mask My Writing Disorder... to Bring You Autistic Joy 17:57 Shoutouts, Coming Next Episode, How You Can Support Support the show

I'm autistic. And I can't DO social groups. I don't think I'm alone. So, I'm launching a hashtag. #GroupProcessingDisorder.Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/ #AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq  Support the showSupport the show

Spacing out... Zoning out... Most autists do it... to survive boring conversations, family get-togethers...So dissociation's a good thing, Til it starts screwing with living your life. Or sense of reality. Content note: mild profanity, one bleeped expletive relating to intellecutal disability.Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/ #AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq  Support the show

 Wanna know what autistic life is like at 70? Joy... and horror. Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/ #AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast Listen & Subscribe: Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3e Spotify https://neon.ly/p1Vay Audible https://neon.ly/vkXa1 Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5Zn PocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3O Amazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq Support the show

Experimenting with  a short #AutisticRave format. Let me know if you'd like to see these in the mix for #AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast.TRANSCRIPT

This episode I talk aging as an Autistic Elder.Getting finally diagnosed at 63… only to face mental decline as I hit 70…?One Swedish study pegged autistic male lifespan at 53. So I'm living on 17 years of borrowed time, I guess… so far.If you're autistic, love one, work with some… or just can't figure out if you are one…There's gonna come a time you worry…Real talk. About real life.Cuz they ain't talking autism in AARP… yet.EXPLICIT: some profanity, brief mentions of drug use & suicidality.Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2022/06/26/look-doc-you-just-dont-get-autisticjoyVideocast with captions: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyhr_MrWVItlwTWODxbZR6AApple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeWebsite & all platforms:  https://autisticafoutloud.buzzsprout.com

Finally learning to create a place of safety, peace, and passionate work...Did more than keep me out of psych wards.It kept me alive. No joke.If you're autistic, love one, work with some… or just can't figure out if you *are* one…You really, *really * need to think about where you live... Videocast with captions: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TAMoN0j-bETranscript:https://autisticaf.me/2022/05/17/designing-my-home-around-adult-autism-pt-2---7-survival-principles/(opens in a new tab)  #AutisticAF Out Loud PodcastListen & Subscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOe 

What do *most* humans want from a new home?To entertain & impress guests. For everything else... they invented tool sheds... and storage units.Honestly...? Autistic-as-f***.me has *different* priorities. Videocast with captions: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyhr_MrWVItlwTWODxbZR6ATranscript: https://autisticaf.me/2022/05/12/designing-my-home-around-adult-autism-pt-1-making-it-work-for-me/#AutisticAF Out Loud PodcastListen & Subscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOe 

Her eyes. So big… Then… Bigger…. Brighter… Enormous… I can't hear anything but a roar. Spinning. I'm going to fall… Terror. That's what eye contact *feels* like… Videocast with captions: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyhr_MrWVItlwTWODxbZR6ATranscript: https://autisticaf.me/2022/04/28/inside-autism-eye-contact-how-it-feels-how-to-deal-with-the-terror/ #AutisticAF Out Loud PodcastListen & Subscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq

Johnny Profane's presentation to the Intersectional Inifinity Summit, educators, parents, caretakers... and autistic folks as well.A little funny. A little bittersweet. And a lotta sly insight from this former class clown...Let's kick Autistic April off with a squeal!Conference video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWu7rUtEb-cTranscript: https://autisticaf.me/ #AutisticAF Out Loud PodcastListen & Subscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeq

“Are you okay? Are you okay? ARE YOU OKAY?”  Like they're talking to a Japanese tourist. And if they just shout loud enough… he'll understand English...  But I'm autistic. And can't speak. When they unload me from the ambulance & into the ER... Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2022/03/26/selective-mutism-i-have-no-mouth-but-i-must-scream-s02e03-transcript/Listen, download, subscribe from Apple/Spotify/all platforms: https://neon.ly/AFOLcast 

“They” say #autism… or #ADHD… are not disabilities. It only seems like that in a world designed for “neurotypicals.”I call that some toxic bullsh*t.Heads up.I'm recovering from what may be a "cold"... or... Omicron Covid.So, I may be triple-vaxxed... But I'm unable to record this week.I'm trying an automated reading service to keep in touch with you all.I call this one, "Shitpost: The 'It's-Not-a-Disability-It's-Society' Myth… Sucks." Transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2022/02/19/shtpost-the-its-not-a-disability-its-society-myth-sucks/Listen, download, subscribe from Apple/Spotify/all platforms: https://neon.ly/AFOLcast

You can help your autistic loved ones feel safer from sexual abuse & assault... It starts with honesty about yourself... and them. Transcript: the-cavalry-never-comes-sexual-assault-an-autistic-life-pt-2-s02e02 #AutisticAF Out Loud.https://AutisticAF.meSubscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeqTranscript/Blog: https://neon.ly/m5Q8o

Let's kick off Season 2 of #AutisticAF Out Loud podcast… by taking a risk.There's not much research on sexual abuse of autistic children… much less adults.Maybe funding sources aren't ready… yet… to stop trying to cure us. And study our lives.So here's my story. Someone's gotta start talking…I've gotta warn you it's rough. Some was too hard for me to read. So I used an assistive voice synthesizer… Weirdly enough, it's robotic voice moves me.If you're autistic, love one, or especially parent one…You need to hear this story.But sexual assault is traumatic. If you experienced it… or love someone who has… this graphic episode could disturb you. In the US, the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline offers support at 1-800-656-4673. Day or night. You'll find a link in the transcript. Also further reading.

What better holiday to discuss adult autistic anxiety...Than Colonialist Thanksgiving....?For many, a freaking minefield of social obligation, exhausting small talk & *grinding* anxiety. Subscribe for all new episodes:#Apple: https://neon.ly/mDd3e#Spotify: https://neon.ly/p1Vay#Amazon/Alexa: https://neon.ly/mnOeq#Audible: https://neon.ly/vkX#Facebook: https://neon.ly/vgPJETranscript/Blog/More platforms: https://neon.ly/m5Q8o#ActuallyAutistic #ADHDSupport the show

Here's the TL;DR....Dear autist, you are hard-wired for #AutisticJoy.Stimming is part of that wiring.You can use this reflex to manage a crisis...AND, believe it or not... to enrich your life.Support the show

Let me bring you inside the experience of Autistic Sensory Overload.

DSM 5… Diagnosis 299.00. An Autism Spectrum Disorder diagnosis… Why get one…? Does it label you for life? Does it change… anything…? Transcript available: https://AutisticAF.me/Support the show

"Austistic Shutdowns: Believe I'll Ch-Ch-Change My Shirt - A Spoken Song (bonus podcast)"AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast: blog post with transcript... https://AutisticAF.me/ Apple/Spotify/Stitcher/Audible/PocketCasts/more https://t.co/gPstaaApXN #ActuallyAutistic #AutisticAdult #DoILookAutisticYet #neurodiversityhttps://t.co/DYIsTy1Z0o

TK--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support

"Comic Book Hero: Surviving Bullying - A Spoken Song (bonus podcast)" AutisticAF Out Loud Podcast: blog post with transcript... https://t.co/6n4S5UbCRF Apple/Spotify/Stitcher/Audible/PocketCasts/more https://t.co/gPstaaApXN #ActuallyAutistic #AutisticAdult #DoILookAutisticYet #neurodiversity https://t.co/DYIsTy1Z0o--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support

This episode is also available as a blog post with transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2021/08/21/autistic-masking-as-performance-art-podcast/--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support

This episode is also available as a blog post with transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2021/08/11/dear-autist-forgiving-your-family-not-a-cosmic-rule-podcast/--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support

This episode is also available as a blog post with transcript: http://autisticaf.me/2021/07/28/millennial-friends-you-are-right-question-everything/--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/supportSupport the show

I think it's time for a little controversy.Let's talk about cops… autists… and tragic violence. Out. Loud.Podcast, including transcript.#AutisticAF Out Loud.https://AutisticAF.meSubscribe:Apple https://neon.ly/mDd3eSpotify https://neon.ly/p1VayAudible https://neon.ly/vkXa1Stitcher https://neon.ly/vx5ZnPocketCasts https://neon.ly/NLL3OAmazon/Alexa https://neon.ly/mnOeqTranscript/Blog: https://neon.ly/m5Q8o Support the show

S01E02: On #AutisticJoy, Personality & Being in the Flow…Today, I'm hot on the trail of #Autistic Joy.What it is. Why you want it. How to get it. This episode is also available as a blog post with transcript: http://autisticaf.me/--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support

“Sometimes it just doesn't pay to be autistic…”Heart-felt note to college student rebuked by professor for being… well, autistic.Also available as blog post with transcript: https://autisticaf.me/2021/06/28/note-to-a-younger-autistic-friend-podcast-1/--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/johnny-profane/support