Podcasts about NVM

'Bouwen voor ouderen is de sleutel tot betere doorstroming op de woningmarkt', dat zegt de NVM, de Nederlandse Vereniging van Makelaars, naar aanleiding van eigen onderzoek. Als je senioren helpt te verhuizen, zo is het idee, komen er weer grote huizen vrij voor jonge gezinnen en starters. Maakt bouwen voor ouderen inderdaad het verschil op de vastgelopen woningmarkt? Presentator Joram Kaat vraagt het aan: * Lana Gerssen, voorzitter van het NVM; * Taco van Hoek, directeur van het Economisch Instituut voor de Bouw.

  Huis kopen - Wat mag je allemaal meefinancieren in je hypotheek? Als je een huis koopt, sluit je waarschijnlijk een hypotheek af. De meeste mensen hebben de bank nodig om een huis te kopen.Maar je wilt nog wat aanpassingen doen. Verduurzamen, verbouwing meefinancieren en andere extra zaken. Ook daar is geld voor nodig. Wat kun je nou wel en wat niet meefinancieren in je hypotheek zoals je bouwdepot of kosten koper en hoe dat werkt. Daar heb ik het in deze podcast uitgebreid over! Ook heb ik nog een interessante link voor je naar ons hypotheekkantoor Papyrus en Assurantiën 

Er worden steeds meer elektrische en hybride warmtepompen geplaatst. Daardoor ontstaan er nieuwe juridische discussies. Immers, warmtepompen produceren geluid en in het burenrecht is bepaald dat je geen onrechtmatige geluidshinder mag veroorzaken. Maar waar ligt de grens? Hoeveel geluid mag een warmtepomp produceren? Daar vertel ik je in deze podcast alles over! Heb je na het luisteren nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze video een

Wat is het verschil tussen de WOZ waarde en de marktwaarde? En hoe ga je bieden op een woning? Wat kun je nou eigenlijk met de WOZ waarde? Heeft het nog zin om de WOZ waarde op te vragen? Dat vertel ik allemaal in deze podcast! G R A T I S    W A A R D E I N D I C A T I E https://tinyurl.com/w3p6avb Video over de waardeberekening van je huis:https://youtu.be/PJyGL70Ib0wHuis kopen vraag het aankooprapport aan:https://digimakelaars.nl/aankooprapport-digimakelaars-bestellen/Heb je na het bekijken van deze video nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

De nieuwe, strengere huurregels zijn eigenlijk nog maar net ingegaan, maar minister Mona Keijzer wil er alweer van af. Deze week kondigde zij aan de voorwaarden voor de verhuur van panden iets te versoepelen. Dat nieuws volgde op spectaculaire nieuwe verkoopcijfers van makelaarsvereniging NVM. Hoe komt het dat er dit jaar flink meer huizen worden verkocht, en kun je eigenlijk nog wel een huis kopen zónder het schrijven van een persoonlijke brief? Luister naar huizenmarkt-expert Marc van den Eerenbeemt en datajournalist Serena Frijters. Lees ook: De kracht van de kopersbrief: ‘We dromen van dit plekje aan de Vecht’ Onze journalistiek steunen? Dat kan het beste met een (digitaal) abonnement op de Volkskrant, daarvoor ga je naar www.volkskrant.nl/podcastactie Presentatie: Esma LinnemannRedactie: Corinne van Duin, Lotte Grimbergen, Julia van Alem, Jasper Veenstra en Lotte GroenendijkMontage: Rinkie BartelsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Een hypotheek voor je recreatiewoning, hoe werkt dat? Tegenwoordig zijn recreatiewoningen populair. Dat komt doordat mensen een eigen plek willen voor vakantie, maar ook omdat deze belegging nog steeds meer oplevert dan je geld op de bank zetten. Heb je spaargeld? Dan hoef je misschien niet te financieren, maar kun je wel een hypotheek krijgen op een vakantiewoning? En hoe werkt dat dan? En mag je dat vakantiehuis dan verhuren? Dat ga ik je in deze podcast uitleggen! Als je iets wilt doen met de overwaarde van je huis heb ik daar verderop in de omschrijving ook nog waardevolle informatie over! Vraag hier de financiële scan aan! https://tinyurl.com/finan-scan Heb je na het beluisteren van deze podcast nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

De huizenmarkt in Nederland - Hoe vind je een huis en hoe ga je bieden op een huis? Hoe kom je nou eigenlijk aan een huis in deze woningmarkt? Voor starters en voor doorstarters is het best ingewikkeld om een ander huis te vinden, zeker als je het huis zoekt in de gewilde steden. De woningmarkt in 2021 is alleen maar krapper geworden. In deze video heb ik wat tips voor je om op een andere manier te gaan zoeken, waardoor het ineens misschien wel lukt om een huis te vinden. L I N K J E S   N A A R   D O W N L O A D S ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° G E M E E N T E L I J K E  C I J F E R S  W O N I N G M A R K T https://tinyurl.com/gemeente-cijfers W O O N W E N S F O R M U L I E R https://tinyurl.com/woonwens Heb je na het bekijken van deze video nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

Inbraakbeveiliging - inbraak voorkomen, hoe denkt een inbreker We gaan weer op vakantie, dus het dievengilde is weer helemaal terug van weggeweest. Om inbraak te voorkomen is het handig om te weten hoe een inbreker denkt, ik geef je in deze video 9 tips om inbraak te voorkomen als je weg bent. Heb je na het beluisteren van deze podcast nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef de podcast een

Wat te doen bij echtscheiding en een eigen huis? Als je nu gaat scheiden heb je meestal een samenlevingscontract, een geregistreerd partnerschap of je bent nog op de “oude” manier voor 1 januari 2018 getrouwd in gemeenschap van goederen of op huwelijkse voorwaarden. Heb je een eigen woning, dan zijn er 2 vragen die onmiddellijk opkomen. In deze podcast geef ik je stappen die je kunt nemen om het hele traject veilig te bewandelen. B I J L E E N R E G E L I N G https://tinyurl.com/de-bijleenregeling S C H U L D O V E R N E M E N N H G https://www.nhg.nl/hulp-van-nhg/hulp-als-je-relatie-eindigt/ B E L A S T I N G D I E N S T https://tinyurl.com/belastingdienst-uitelkaar Heb je na het beluisteren van deze podcast nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef de podcast een

No, David Waldman did not watch the speech, or the Oscars, or the Super Bowl, all right? (The TV's been stuck on the History Channel since David lost the remote.) Greg Dworkin is still on Skype, which is now shutting down, forcing an alternative. Greg will be choosing between Zoom or his dial-up fax machine in the basement, whichever has the most pleasant ringtone. Donald K. Trump presented his State of Denial “address”… It was a “Joint Address” to the Gops who love humiliation, and the Dems, who are learning to. Of course, some Democrats boycotted, but most did not. Some had signs, most did not. Al Green stood up, and was ejected. The rest chose not to join him. Expediency seems to be the hill they have chosen to die on, and there's certainly little disarray there. With Democrats keeping a low profile until 2026 2028 2030… it once again falls upon Trump to do all the heavy lifting. The plan has always been to keep the masses just at the precipice of an uprising, but this administration might be slightly overplaying their hand. (Yes, Steve Inskeep is on Blue Sky) Trump tariffs might sink the stock market, but don't worry, rich people will still get rich even when poor people get poor. Trump's tariffs might hurt Trump voters, but Trump doesn't need them to vote for him anymore. It will take a lot more than mere poverty to ever cool their ardor, though. (Yes, Will Jordan is on Blue Sky) Anyhow, each passing moment is another opportunity to declare victory and completely reverse course, faster than a bro can change his Zyn pouch. DOGE lists 443 federal properties up for sale, because why work in a building that you own, when you can rent it? NVM... the list went away.  Trump is halting enforcement against corporate lawbreakers. Who says he doesn't have empathy for his brethren? However, the Trump Supreme Court says 5-4 that Trump has to follow contractual obligations. Is it too late for Donald to get a full refund on John Roberts?

Een hypotheek aanvragen met studieschuld We horen wel eens verhalen over mensen die hun studieschuld verzwijgen voor de hypotheek. Omdat ze dan meer kunnen lenen. Dat is niet handig. Wat je allemaal wel kan met een hypotheek en studieschuld vertel ik je in deze podcast. Heb je na het bekijken van deze video nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

Inspired by bands like The Cure, Van Halen, Smashing Pumpkins, and a slew of emo bands from the mid-2000, NVM pulls influence from old-school 80s rock, shoegaze, and hardcore to form a sound described as "nostalgic" without planting its feet firmly in any genre. Thanks for listening!!! Please Follow us on Instagram @hiddentracks99Pre and Post roll music brought to you by @sleepcyclespa

Wat is WWFT identificatie en hoe werkt de WWFT checklist? Als je een huis koopt of verkoopt zal je het vast wel gehoord hebben van je makelaar. ''We moeten nog even een WWFT check doen.''. En wat is dat dan? Waarom moet het en hoe werkt het uitvoeringsbesluit WWFT? In deze podcast leg ik het uit! L E I D R A A D W W F T https://tinyurl.com/leidraadWWFT Heb je na het beluisteren van dezepodcast nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

Wat moet je allemaal doen in de week voor de sleuteloverdracht? Als de overdrachtsdatum van je huis eraan komt, moeten er nog wel een paar dingen geregeld worden. Zowel door de koper als door de verkoper. In deze podcast vertel ik jou wat er voor de sleuteloverdracht nog allemaal langskomt. V R A G E N L I J S T  O V E R  Z I C H T B A R E  E N  O N Z I C H T B A R E  G E B R E K E N https://tinyurl.com/gebreken-huis Vond je dit een leuke podcast? Geef de podcast een like!A B O N N E E R  J E  O P  O N S  Y O U T U B E K A N A A L https://tinyurl.com/digi-subscribe V O L G D I G I M A K E L A A R S ❕ https://www.digimakelaars.nl/ ◽ F A C E B O O K ➳ https://www.facebook.com/digimakelaars/ ◽ P I N T E R E S T ➳ https://www.pinterest.com/digimakelaars/ ◽ I N S T A G R A M➳ https://www.instagram.com/digimakelaars/ Voel je vrij om contact op te nemen met Digimakelaars

Wie nu een huis wil kopen in Nederland moet daar gemiddeld bijna een half miljoen voor neerleggen. Daartegenover is er wel meer ‘dynamiek’ op de woningmarkt. Dat meldde van de Nederlandse Vereniging voor Makelaars afgelopen donderdag. Te gast is voorzitter van de NVM vakgroep Wonen Lara Gerssen. Macro met Boot Elke dag een intrigerende gedachtewisseling over de stand van de macro-economie. Op maandag en vrijdag gaat presentator Thomas van Zijl in gesprek met econoom Arnoud Boot, de rest van de week praat Van Zijl met econoom Edin Mujagić. Economenpanel De kapitaalmarktrentes op staatsobligaties van westerse economieën zijn in een maand tijd sterk opgelopen. En: als het aan Trump ligt, verhogen NAVO-lidstaten hun defensie-uitgaven naar 5 procent van het bbp. Is er een lidstaat dat dat aankan? Dat en meer bespreken we om 11.10 in het Economenpanel met: Steven Brakman, hoogleraar internationale economie aan de Rijksuniversiteit Groningen, en Roelof Salomons, Chief investment Strategist at BlackRock & Hoogleraar beleggingstheorie en vermogensbeheer aan de Rijksuniversiteit Groningen. Contact & Abonneren BNR Zakendoen zendt elke werkdag live uit van 11:00 tot 13:30 uur. Je kunt de redactie bereiken via e-mail. Abonneren op de podcast van BNR Zakendoen kan via bnr.nl/zakendoen, of via Apple Podcast en Spotify. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Wie nu een huis wil kopen in Nederland moet daar gemiddeld bijna een half miljoen voor neerleggen. Daartegenover is er wel meer ‘dynamiek’ op de woningmarkt. Blijkt uit cijfers van de Nederlandse Vereniging voor Makelaars. Is die dynamiek een direct gevolg van de huurwet van voormalig woonminister Hugo de Jonge? In ‘De top van Nederland’ heeft presentator Thomas van Zijl een uitgebreid gesprek met Lana Gerssen, voorzitter van vakgroep Wonen van de NVM. Over NVM De Nederlandse Vereniging van Makelaars is een belangenvereniging waar ruim 4300 makelaars en taxateurs bij aangesloten zijn. Elk kwartaal publiceert de NVM cijfers over de woningmarkt. Over Thomas van Zijl Thomas van Zijl is financieel journalist en presentator bij BNR. Hij presenteert dagelijks ‘BNR Zakendoen’, het Nederlandse radioprogramma voor economisch nieuws en zakelijk inzicht, waar 'De top van Nederland’ onderdeel van is. Ook is hij een van de makers van de podcast ‘Onder curatoren’. Abonneer je op de podcast Ga naar ‘De top van Nederland’ en abonneer je op de podcast, ook te beluisteren via Apple Podcast en Spotify. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

De voorzitter van de Raad voor de rechtspraak pleit voor het afschaffen van de rol van de politiek bij het benoemen van leden van de Raad voor de Rechtspraak. Om actieve politieke bemoeienis te voorkomen in de toekomst, wil voorzitter Henk Naves een nieuw systeem. Niet in de laatste plaats omdat de raadsleden op hun beurt weer verantwoordelijk voor het aanwijzen van andere sleutelfiguren binnen de rechtspraak. Zijn pleidooi komt niet uit het niets, vertelt redacteur Jennifer Mol. Lees ook: Rechtspraak bepleit einde aan rol politiek bij benoemingen Op een onverminderd gespannen woningmarkt zijn de huizenprijzen in sommige grote steden toch licht gedaald. Makelaars verkochten bovendien veel meer woningen dan in voorgaande periodes, terwijl de prijzen op landelijk niveau nog altijd een geringe stijging lieten zien. Wat zeggen al deze nieuwe NVM-cijfers nu over de woningmarkt? We bespreken het met woningmarktredacteur Erik van Rein. Lees: Huizenprijzen stijgen nog, maar niet meer in Eindhoven en Amsterdam Boeren door het hele land worden tot wanhoop gedreven door een ongrijpbaar verschijnsel: zwerfstroom. Redacteuren Maureen Blankestijn en Joris Polman gingen langs bij een boer die kampt met zieke koeien en een tegenvallende melkopbrengst. Volgens de boer in kwestie wordt dat veroorzaakt door de zwerfstroom uit de windmolens even verderop. Wat is dat precies zwerfstroom? En wordt deze boer ook door zijn omgeving geloofd? Je hoort het van Maureen. Lees: Zwerfstroom: hoe een raadselachtig verschijnsel boeren tot wanhoop drijft Redactie: Jildou Beiboer en Anna de Haas Presentatie: Anna de Haas See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Overhangende goten of dakoverstek, erfdienstbaardheid, gootrecht en ladderrecht Soms kom je het tegen als je een huis koopt, een deel van het gebouw staat op of direct tegen de perceelsgrens, of de goten of overstek hangen over de perceelsgrens heen. En af en toe moet je daar dan bij voor onderhoud. Hoe regel je dat en waar let je op bij de koop? Formeel kunnen de buren eisen dat je dat weghaalt, maar is niet altijd een goed idee. En wat is gootrecht of ladderrecht eigenlijk? In deze video vertel ik het allemaal! G R A T I S W A A R D E I N D I C A T I E https://digimakelaars.nl/gratis-waarde-indicatie/ Heb je na het beluisteren van deze podcast nog vragen? Laat je vraag dan achter in de comments! Geef deze podcast een

HEY. …hello. [breaks shit] Oh. [he grabs the man by the collar] You— —aren't you the kid from that one movie— —I'm the kid from your mom's house! —that's major disrespectful— —I'll tell you what; Okay?! —you—are going to grow a mustache. What! Why! Because you are! That's not going to look good at all! Exactly my point “The Worst Mustache Ever” [the super buff dude forces the man to swallow two large capsules] NO! YES, actually. WHAT WAS THAT. Testosterone. Happy hair-ing. What am I supposed to grow a mustache for? JUST DO IT! How are you still on that? BECAUSE I'M STUCK IN A LOOP! This plane is about to go down. What. lol do I look like I have Down's syndrome? Yes. Good. Let's go see the show: Meanwhile. lol wtf is wrong with Nvm. No. Hold the fuck on. What the fuck is wrong with Gwenyth Paltrow? Who?! EXACTLY. {Enter The Multiverse} Well, surely, you must know— No. Well, then you probably. Also, no. Well then— No. Not at all. I don't know anything; You don't even know what I was about to say! I don't know any of these people. How do you not remember anything? I was blacked out! The whole time. Predominately. Man. I feel like shit, Right? …wanna do it again? This nigga don't see; Invisibility cloak over your head Like my rhymes be; Jesus Christ it is, Icy biz Damn I lost my cadence. Something about the wizard of oz. Man I'm slow as fuck right now. Well, let's speed up then. Come on, now, I don't got all day. I'm entirely sure the whole point of avoidance Is to avoid. Avoid what. This: cooooooooooooool. I might actually have to shoot you now. Shoot me then. I don't give any kind of fuck. Oh you don't? No. Get out of the way. You don't give any fuck— at all. No. I just want kids. Gross. Shoot me then. This is Hopsin, I would bet— Man, the only reason I'm still listening to this song to see if he talks about his balls L E G E N D S Beat you up tech9 >< In the end linkin park Sister, TSHA>< Sedona Elohim Something is wrong My whole world went sepia tone I'm getting too old for this Show on the road and I'm bold for this I'm in a silicone mold for this I sold for this; I been all alone for this You picked a winner— I wrote a movie then took him to dinner; Wrote me a verse so hard, Hard er called me a jiggger Sure Take a picture it'll last longer Shut up, take your top off Don't call me a bitch in front of my kids, Or I'll run off ‍♀️ I forgot about my coffee It's cold now I been inside all day Thinking bout dying alone Wrote a letter (I burned it) Wrote a whole show But I don't know what it's about At all I think about a gunshot wound Straight to the head Almost every day of my life I used to jump the train Out of ideation, Now, I admire More blunt force trauma More lost love, huh. A harbored fugitive I should dwindle it down; It was me at the end of that rope, eh? (It sure was.) Crocodile tears, And a mile of paid programming Now where were you, Onto us— Or just steady bearing Good news, As they were— Tight noose, As it was— Loose strings, And hard knocks— Square knots and A lot of hats. Did you wan to fulfill our synthesis to symphonies yet? I barred in carriage to see that I wilted away in his essence Then, greetings; anchored in agony And weathered in women, Fearing agreements. Tethered here now and forever, As if— A hollow ball on candlestick To which no court belongs. Surely, you could see yourself dying in my arms. Surely I saw forward and backwards and in neither direction was I at any point, anywhere other than what I ought to be; Where I wanted to sit exactly, At the furthest point possible Away. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

“Seth Meyers And the Cauldron of Doom” OMG— YOU have a cauldron of doom?! I have a cauldron of doom!!! DO NOT SHAKE THIS SNOWGLOBE. I had been avoiding Rockefeller plaza for months as it was, without the sometimes accidental ending up there anyway, and I thought not once but twice or three times about changing into my regular pants so that the deep pockets could hold my keys and passports sans wallet— or a purse and considered taking a notebook as well; on the list of prohibited items were backpacks and large bags, and though the dress code seemed to be null in void at all, I was happy to be able to wear my hat at least— and almost prepared to be dogged out, the last min it e change into my harem pants would probably be the comfortable choice; looking intentionally dressed down as a statement—a broad statement that I wasn't looking to be noticed at all, or trying to be noticed. The guest for the show was nearly an EGOT winner, probably younger, and definitely skinner and more beautiful than I was; a black woman, but a British woman, and it would be almost entirely impossible to think that besides Whoopi Goldberg, an American black woman would strive to win such a thing as an EGOT herself. Still, I was looking for a cure to the writer's block and crippling depression that I had been in, however—knowing who the president of Peacock was, and after the elections at all's though I knew NBC to be left-leaning— I didn't feel at all as if I would ever belong on the stage, and was quite happily taking my place as simply a fan…and audience member, though ready to creep back into obscurity, and probably more likely than not with a pint of Ben and Jerry's after the show. I had gone to see Drew Barrymore sand makeup, and would do the same, but only as a proclamation that I had read Tina Fey's book nearly religiously now rounding three times, and I almost wish I had an oversized black t-shirt which read “hot water heater” to accompany my lax look and blonde hair—a testament to her correctness standing, as the grossities of tinder loved “the blonde”, almost as if, without the hair I would be ugly, and just as much in the same breath, unworthy of such status anyway. But more than anything, I just wanted to be able to write again, at least for my own sake, and certainly not for anyone else's. I was still in hiatus, for the better, and had not completely recovered from the unbearable racism and parallel of doom the election had tossed me into with trajectory—in this world—supposedly “fascist”. I was comfortable enough in the jeans, but had nowhere to put my phone. I was ready to be dogged out and shown what a real a list celebrity looked like, and why I simply wasn't one. I left the house with a sink full of dishes, an unmade bed, and a pile of laundry unfolded—a pile of books in boxes I had collected for my son but would cost too much to send—almost as a testament to his sick I had been since the election. In this world, I was just another poor black fat single mother— a dead beat living in poverty. In trump's world, I was an ugly, poor nothing. Everywhere I had gone about the past week, the rich seemed richer and the poor poorer, the whites whiter and the blacks blacker, good gone and evil fleeting, with the return of the motorcycles and pieces of me dying, simply giving up. I planned my return to the workforce, and the eventual fortitude of my freedom; the wealthy had become more arrogant, and the rest of us more distraught. What was I going to rocketfeller plaza for, anyway? The news. My apartment was disgusting, but at least I had been to the gym—I had run the full mile and lifted and pulled, all with the gym to myself. My harem pants still felt even better, and for the first time in me months I ventured into the world in only one waist trainer. Be prepared to be [lost in a revolving door Be cool to the two dudes in blue suits goddamnit I never know where I'm going in this bitch. I can never breath in this bitch and I don't know why. How do you get lost at the rock? Like this: [Infinitely Lost at Rockafeller Plaza] This is why I avoid this place like the plague. Maybe I'm the plague. First of all, there's no track on the floor upstairs. (I've never been upstairs.) It's just store after store of ways to spend money. This is my only pair of clean socks. No shit, this is the reason practicing your mantras on the train becomes dangerous. DANGEROUS. Somewhere in the frenzy, I remember this. Frequency, however, Not yet partial to my own inner self, and empty in the array of superstardom, I become nothing, Only a spectator of celebrity— And now, suddenly. 8 remember this day Why? Suddenly, now, in the Is moment. Where I always have been, waiting for myself— I avoid Rockerfeller plaza at all costs. Why. I heard a grimlin lives here. Now is the time for Skrillex! I would really love you forever if you didn't. Que the Arc! Oh boy, this writer's block is a doozy. The only reason I had even bothered was because it was as if I had been summoned, as if something had clocked in my sense memory where, all of a sudden, looking at an unrelated picture of some kid on Tinee, with his hands covering his mouth the way that Stefon always did, made me immidiately stop whatever I was doing—probably eating tacos or pancakes, insurmountably out of bounds— and pausing the comedian I was watching instead, just to watch Stefon, and in the way that I remembered it all, it made me laugh. Although now, I knew exactly what he was talking about by the avant-grade and strangely abysmal club scene not just of the time, but of any time in New York City— and, somehow summoning a laugh even in the darkness that had been my own distraught and depression in the previous weeks, something of a belly roll laugh might have triggered something in the alrgorithm to send last minute tickets to my email in almost that exact moment. Are they going to tell me to take off my hat?! There was no dress code, They had better not tell me to take off my motherfucking hat. I won't do it. Fuck Seth Meyers . I'm not taking off my hat for Seth Meyers. Oh yeah. That's why I'm here. I found it hard to say that I was there for such a thing; I— I turned off my peripheral vision and hyperfocus. I didn't know there would be music. Goddammit. I had deleted Shazam filming for I love New York, an all but abandoned project—the writer's block had been too real, and now the real rest had come—would I laugh at anything in show show when in reality I wanted to cry? The way the lights kept going up and down as if it were intermission only slightly distracted from the fact that I had never seen a page in real life. THEY EXIST . I had never seen an actual NBC PAGE. GODDAMMIT GET THIS BLUE SUIT LOAFER WEARING MOTHERFUCKER OUT OF MY PERIPHERAL BEFORE I LOSE IT. Shoot a midget at her. What. Just do it. Don't do that. What Don't put the midget in the cannon. What! Thays's what he's here for! I'm a stunt double! This is a stunt. That's a horrible joke. That's not a joke. SHAZAM. WTF IS THIS. Some top 40 bullshit. Good, get it ( I'm never going to have any other l exposure to top 40, ever in my life. ) Congratulations, you've made the A list What?! NO FAIR. What. What does that mean. It means I can't do shit and mandatory attendance to everything. What is everything “Everythin—g.” Man, fuck this. Alright At this moment, I realize I must be some sort of autistic. Let's get this over with… I let the sound of my own mix blare in my ears to drown out the sound of whatever pop singer was on over the loud speakers; I didn't realize there would be music, and I hoped the flutter was good l. Maybe it was the lights, or whatever, but— SUNNI BLU what in the fuck dimention is this . It's the same dimension, you're just drunk. Ah. Now what? I was as uncomfortable as ever, there was a track on the higher level, but it didn't matter, the cattle call was contained inside of velvet ropes— black ones, unlike the typical red ones, and it was at this point I realized that not only had I never seen actual NBC pages— Yo, their skirts are kinda short… RIGHT. I THOUGHT THE PAGES WERE THE PARAGON OF SANCTITY! No, those are, um… Nvm. Maybe the ugly shoes distract from the shortness of their skirts on the general basis. Oh come on, nobody gives a fuck how ugly your shoes are if your skirt is that short! These are facts, Liz. No, I'm serious what dimention is this. I already told you. I had to ask for directions three times just get here. THIS IS MY LEVEL. why is your level on acid. Cause. This is—just— Where I'm at. CUT TO: Jimmy Fallon after Mardi Gras's. Come on that's not fair! {Enter The Multiverse} What exactly isn't fair?! He's in all the scenes. Well, how else are you going to explain a time traveling helicopter?! Got him. THERES MY INVISIBLE MOTORCYCLE. I'm not going to pa— Goddamn it. I'm not going to p— It actually hurt not to write and just stand there; but I still didn't feel like myself—or sound like myself—or look like myself; I was playing a character, I just didnt know who. As I moved forward in line, the music began to fade away behind me and into the nothingness that was whatever was behind, in front of, and all around me. I hated cattle calls, but after all, I was still just a fan and as the world began to fold into chaos, I realized that my pants were falling off of me, though I had been feeling fat, and walking, and running, and cycling, and protein shaking—the only thing that had gained any extra weight was my ass, which was exactly what I was intending on hiding with my same old usual harems. My blonde hair made it so that I stuck out like a sore thumb, but that didn't matter, I was a walking statement piece and almost in a fit of tears just thinking about my own status; the NBC pages probably all had crazy incredible accolades and numerous degrees and achievements—what was I, if anything at all— ? I had put the candles out, but had I left the stove on? Did I really unplug the nail dryer and leave the stove on? I had almost washed all of the dishes, but stopped just short of right on time to leave; my producer brain was on fire and wanted more pancakes, but however hard I tried I could not find where I had placed my EBT card; probably for the better—celebrities didn't carry EBT cards, and even my awkward general being thrown off by the doorman or security— —whichever I wasn't sure— standing outside of the roller rink— probably ice this time of year, by the looks of the Zamboni in the foreground of it… ‘Don't stop writing, no matter what. ‘ Dammit, dammit dammit— That seems inappropriate. I told you to get this motherfucker out of my peripheral before something— Nevermind, don't write that. [redacted] (But imma remember this shit cause it's heavy.) A remarkable and accidental tableau, My feet flat to the floor, as my ankles bare, This is my only pair of hole-less socks. I feel so much better with my back against the wall and Listening to mau5 and, Not giving a fuck about the music playing Or the people watching But keeping it for later Forgetting how to codeswitch, Just an ever so limited existence Trying not to stick out like a sore thumb in the wrong world It's a long way up, But even longer way down, And in all the demoralizing humiliation and emasculation, I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all, No mana I realized my son's Lego Lamborghini should be waiting for me as I returned to my apartment in Brooklyn probably starting but pretending not to care; I winced at everything— this was a dangerous disaster, to even be in the building at all and edging closer to death were the secrets I kept that were not only secrets, but non existences. Nothing in nothing and nothing— Oh shit, is the suffering done? This is the end of the End of the end It's the Beginning of the end It's the end of the beginning This will be the end Of the end Of the end, This will be the end of the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning Of the end Of the beginning of the end. This will be the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning of the beginning Of the end of the end Of the beginning Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the end Of the end Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning, The beginning of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end (This will be the end) Of the beginning This will be the beginning The beginning of the beginning Of the end My friends. LET US COMMECE! All of it, this is recorded history, Smoke and mirrors, here portions and pardons This is probably why can't breathe at the rock Was I here last time; I choked last time I wrote nothing remarkable at all (Nothing remarkable at all.) I love getting lost at the rock Okay, this is the host— This is the host of the show (I think I lost my lunch before.) I was at a show, I never woke up, Okay; This is the host This is the host (This is the host) This is the host. Cue the Nirvana; Curtains go up, I don't want to see the show, I just want to host it. I don't want to get lost no more On the way to the rock Or the store Cause only one train goes there I wanna climb the straits to the top Get lost at the rock, Guess this isn't he host huh This is the lost god, That was a long walk The top of the rock off is a long jump And I'm still in talks how's every morning Someone told me not to ignore you So, this is the host, huh. Someone told me, go hard or go home (Almost time tknkove) Parenthesises, please and—Parenthetical, hypotheticals and paleontology's, Please, I need a mixologist (And anthologist) Please slow down to peace, Mr poltergeist, Please Mr poltergeist The ghost of Mr giest I'm doing a hiest Please, slow down mister poltergeist, Please for the peace Mr. Poltergeist, Or what have you? How old are you, 40. I'm the whole medium and still, Nice to meat you sir. A house made of mediums I hope that shock, And I hop to the rock there's still something in it A pogo stick Or a poltergeist Slow down, poltergeist. Terrible timing, Victoria Beckham and monsuier, Please Mr, I mean it no more— If I'm Mr ooltergieat (A policeman and polgergeist) Please, sir, no jokes. All sandwhich, no buns and pastrmi, And all the God, I'm going cold, I'm going ghost again And a the god, on all the rocks, I'm going old, I'm going cold again; On all the God on all the rocks, I'm going God, I'm going old again Hold on again, mi got a song again? I'm just a serviceman WATCH OUT FOR THE DOORMAN. MORE FUEL. So all the Rockerfeller plazas on all the earths aim alll yhr parallel dimensions can actually communicate with each other RADIO CITY BABBBBBBBYYYYYYY! OH GOD. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE Did you get his dog's name!? I think so. Good. [meniacal rubbing of hands] good. Cue the nirvana. Cue the m— Mitosis. The migos. Nah, I can't catch the flow. There it is. [the flow is a literal] Something medicinal in this meniacal, is this I spy a specscle, monocle— monopoly, Time to go, it's the devil at my left; Time for the fight against darkness, And it all is, Cause this is the ark, Noah This is the arc, God. This is apartheid and apart from that. You're fired. What. You heard me. But—I'm Seth Meyers. That's debatable. I am! I'm Seth Meyers. If you say so. This is nonsense. It's not nonsense. It is nonsense. And it's also impossible; cause this is my show. It's my show, I'M SETH MEYERS. Debatable, Not debatable. I'm ME. THAT'S ME. Debatable. I can't even hear the words, But the bass is so fire, I summon Shazam! …I want a ham sandwhich. Oh good! He's alive. Ham. Sandwhich. What the fuck happened buddy?! Where were you man?! —Zoolander. What. disleylandhamsandwhich. Get him a sandwhich!!!!! YO QUIERO CUBANO. Here's your sandwhich. CUBANO. Remember what you look like Who you are What your place is What you weigh, And Check your status Remember how still started What your mark is And what happened to your wallet; Did you leave the stove on Do you put the show on; Did you miss your mark Your mom was hotter Please remember the circumstances In which you—- [BLACKOUT] After several days gone completely missing, Jimmy Fallon is found under the craft services table sleeping peacefully. The apparatus I entered in with Is not adjusted to this condition The biometrics are non concurrent; {enter the multiverse} I felt tragic. By the time I got back to my apartment, my ribcage was showing again—although I had only been wearing one waist trainer, it was the skimpy one, and it was already wearing, it was after all eight dollars. Really and once and for all, something had come over me at Rockerfeller plaza that I didn't understand. I was more awkward and nervous than usual, and sure that I should have eaten, but couldn't —even after a long gym session, there was no time for food before the show, and I had no stomach for it. I chose to as much as I could ignore the code switching, and the more I picked it up, the further my mind began to drift. —a door slammed. My documents were probably compromised, and my phone hacked which I might have guessed, but continuing the thought I had often wondered how or why anything could have possibly known what I had written, or how—or how anyone would know what I had written, or of the things I had written, and most importantly of all—what did I write?! Most of the previous months' entries into the festival project were a blank, and the time I had spent considerably enough sifting through whatever masked man acting in part of Fallon, whoever he really was had been turbulent, as if I had been disfigured to be brainwashed into half a mind—then, slowly peeking back the layers of such a chaotic artifact of time and this, Seth Meyers, to whom now I had become a loyal fan, an actual fan—and had noticed something ingenuously crafted here. A genuine and talented, very kind and gifted man, who was not in any sense miserable or in peril. Peril, so to speak, as I remembered the almost villainous approach that the decent into madness had accompanied this Fallon and his mask, and besides this was the assumption that Seth Meyers, though professionally trained as such, seemed happy. Fallon did not. We had all learned to craft masks in order to protect our inner selves—however, with such a veil lifted as the partitioned screen of all does, this spoke to me with numerous volumes and sometimes even screamed, with the ethics of no worse a gentleman than some surgeon soldier or sailor and no more a nobleman than a king or god itself; I had not been Shocked and all but murmured even to just the slightest gawk of just an awkward cry, a muster of some shallow disaster which had called me to all of them— to whom I had loved and yet somehow not known, at least being here—and here I was, slightly convulsed, bearing no armor and gripping at the fortitude of death's barriers; On wheels with no bearings plummeted towards a forged death of sorts, by my own hands but also at the hands of others, the forgery calling from the halls of a place I had known as once my own fortress; but was no more. I belonged and now, almost with gratitude, to the eye of all gods, and all things that moved. No cherished nature, perhaps, was this into my own eye, but of disgust for what I had not yet accomplished, and still might never— I was a skull and crossbones with no love, and nothing known at all besides my own. —Tales of a superstar DJ “16 Songs” I got it. What's that. The thing that sets Seth Meyers apart from the other hosts. What is it? Seth Meyers is not a host—he's an anchor. Goddammit, you're right . I know I'm right. GODDAMIT. It just took me this long to figure it out . Great. Now how long's it gonna get you to take this thing fixed. Possibly forever. Entaer The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

“Seth Meyers And the Cauldron of Doom” OMG— YOU have a cauldron of doom?! I have a cauldron of doom!!! DO NOT SHAKE THIS SNOWGLOBE. I had been avoiding Rockefeller plaza for months as it was, without the sometimes accidental ending up there anyway, and I thought not once but twice or three times about changing into my regular pants so that the deep pockets could hold my keys and passports sans wallet— or a purse and considered taking a notebook as well; on the list of prohibited items were backpacks and large bags, and though the dress code seemed to be null in void at all, I was happy to be able to wear my hat at least— and almost prepared to be dogged out, the last min it e change into my harem pants would probably be the comfortable choice; looking intentionally dressed down as a statement—a broad statement that I wasn't looking to be noticed at all, or trying to be noticed. The guest for the show was nearly an EGOT winner, probably younger, and definitely skinner and more beautiful than I was; a black woman, but a British woman, and it would be almost entirely impossible to think that besides Whoopi Goldberg, an American black woman would strive to win such a thing as an EGOT herself. Still, I was looking for a cure to the writer's block and crippling depression that I had been in, however—knowing who the president of Peacock was, and after the elections at all's though I knew NBC to be left-leaning— I didn't feel at all as if I would ever belong on the stage, and was quite happily taking my place as simply a fan…and audience member, though ready to creep back into obscurity, and probably more likely than not with a pint of Ben and Jerry's after the show. I had gone to see Drew Barrymore sand makeup, and would do the same, but only as a proclamation that I had read Tina Fey's book nearly religiously now rounding three times, and I almost wish I had an oversized black t-shirt which read “hot water heater” to accompany my lax look and blonde hair—a testament to her correctness standing, as the grossities of tinder loved “the blonde”, almost as if, without the hair I would be ugly, and just as much in the same breath, unworthy of such status anyway. But more than anything, I just wanted to be able to write again, at least for my own sake, and certainly not for anyone else's. I was still in hiatus, for the better, and had not completely recovered from the unbearable racism and parallel of doom the election had tossed me into with trajectory—in this world—supposedly “fascist”. I was comfortable enough in the jeans, but had nowhere to put my phone. I was ready to be dogged out and shown what a real a list celebrity looked like, and why I simply wasn't one. I left the house with a sink full of dishes, an unmade bed, and a pile of laundry unfolded—a pile of books in boxes I had collected for my son but would cost too much to send—almost as a testament to his sick I had been since the election. In this world, I was just another poor black fat single mother— a dead beat living in poverty. In trump's world, I was an ugly, poor nothing. Everywhere I had gone about the past week, the rich seemed richer and the poor poorer, the whites whiter and the blacks blacker, good gone and evil fleeting, with the return of the motorcycles and pieces of me dying, simply giving up. I planned my return to the workforce, and the eventual fortitude of my freedom; the wealthy had become more arrogant, and the rest of us more distraught. What was I going to rocketfeller plaza for, anyway? The news. My apartment was disgusting, but at least I had been to the gym—I had run the full mile and lifted and pulled, all with the gym to myself. My harem pants still felt even better, and for the first time in me months I ventured into the world in only one waist trainer. Be prepared to be [lost in a revolving door Be cool to the two dudes in blue suits goddamnit I never know where I'm going in this bitch. I can never breath in this bitch and I don't know why. How do you get lost at the rock? Like this: [Infinitely Lost at Rockafeller Plaza] This is why I avoid this place like the plague. Maybe I'm the plague. First of all, there's no track on the floor upstairs. (I've never been upstairs.) It's just store after store of ways to spend money. This is my only pair of clean socks. No shit, this is the reason practicing your mantras on the train becomes dangerous. DANGEROUS. Somewhere in the frenzy, I remember this. Frequency, however, Not yet partial to my own inner self, and empty in the array of superstardom, I become nothing, Only a spectator of celebrity— And now, suddenly. 8 remember this day Why? Suddenly, now, in the Is moment. Where I always have been, waiting for myself— I avoid Rockerfeller plaza at all costs. Why. I heard a grimlin lives here. Now is the time for Skrillex! I would really love you forever if you didn't. Que the Arc! Oh boy, this writer's block is a doozy. The only reason I had even bothered was because it was as if I had been summoned, as if something had clocked in my sense memory where, all of a sudden, looking at an unrelated picture of some kid on Tinee, with his hands covering his mouth the way that Stefon always did, made me immidiately stop whatever I was doing—probably eating tacos or pancakes, insurmountably out of bounds— and pausing the comedian I was watching instead, just to watch Stefon, and in the way that I remembered it all, it made me laugh. Although now, I knew exactly what he was talking about by the avant-grade and strangely abysmal club scene not just of the time, but of any time in New York City— and, somehow summoning a laugh even in the darkness that had been my own distraught and depression in the previous weeks, something of a belly roll laugh might have triggered something in the alrgorithm to send last minute tickets to my email in almost that exact moment. Are they going to tell me to take off my hat?! There was no dress code, They had better not tell me to take off my motherfucking hat. I won't do it. Fuck Seth Meyers . I'm not taking off my hat for Seth Meyers. Oh yeah. That's why I'm here. I found it hard to say that I was there for such a thing; I— I turned off my peripheral vision and hyperfocus. I didn't know there would be music. Goddammit. I had deleted Shazam filming for I love New York, an all but abandoned project—the writer's block had been too real, and now the real rest had come—would I laugh at anything in show show when in reality I wanted to cry? The way the lights kept going up and down as if it were intermission only slightly distracted from the fact that I had never seen a page in real life. THEY EXIST . I had never seen an actual NBC PAGE. GODDAMMIT GET THIS BLUE SUIT LOAFER WEARING MOTHERFUCKER OUT OF MY PERIPHERAL BEFORE I LOSE IT. Shoot a midget at her. What. Just do it. Don't do that. What Don't put the midget in the cannon. What! Thays's what he's here for! I'm a stunt double! This is a stunt. That's a horrible joke. That's not a joke. SHAZAM. WTF IS THIS. Some top 40 bullshit. Good, get it ( I'm never going to have any other l exposure to top 40, ever in my life. ) Congratulations, you've made the A list What?! NO FAIR. What. What does that mean. It means I can't do shit and mandatory attendance to everything. What is everything “Everythin—g.” Man, fuck this. Alright At this moment, I realize I must be some sort of autistic. Let's get this over with… I let the sound of my own mix blare in my ears to drown out the sound of whatever pop singer was on over the loud speakers; I didn't realize there would be music, and I hoped the flutter was good l. Maybe it was the lights, or whatever, but— SUNNI BLU what in the fuck dimention is this . It's the same dimension, you're just drunk. Ah. Now what? I was as uncomfortable as ever, there was a track on the higher level, but it didn't matter, the cattle call was contained inside of velvet ropes— black ones, unlike the typical red ones, and it was at this point I realized that not only had I never seen actual NBC pages— Yo, their skirts are kinda short… RIGHT. I THOUGHT THE PAGES WERE THE PARAGON OF SANCTITY! No, those are, um… Nvm. Maybe the ugly shoes distract from the shortness of their skirts on the general basis. Oh come on, nobody gives a fuck how ugly your shoes are if your skirt is that short! These are facts, Liz. No, I'm serious what dimention is this. I already told you. I had to ask for directions three times just get here. THIS IS MY LEVEL. why is your level on acid. Cause. This is—just— Where I'm at. CUT TO: Jimmy Fallon after Mardi Gras's. Come on that's not fair! {Enter The Multiverse} What exactly isn't fair?! He's in all the scenes. Well, how else are you going to explain a time traveling helicopter?! Got him. THERES MY INVISIBLE MOTORCYCLE. I'm not going to pa— Goddamn it. I'm not going to p— It actually hurt not to write and just stand there; but I still didn't feel like myself—or sound like myself—or look like myself; I was playing a character, I just didnt know who. As I moved forward in line, the music began to fade away behind me and into the nothingness that was whatever was behind, in front of, and all around me. I hated cattle calls, but after all, I was still just a fan and as the world began to fold into chaos, I realized that my pants were falling off of me, though I had been feeling fat, and walking, and running, and cycling, and protein shaking—the only thing that had gained any extra weight was my ass, which was exactly what I was intending on hiding with my same old usual harems. My blonde hair made it so that I stuck out like a sore thumb, but that didn't matter, I was a walking statement piece and almost in a fit of tears just thinking about my own status; the NBC pages probably all had crazy incredible accolades and numerous degrees and achievements—what was I, if anything at all— ? I had put the candles out, but had I left the stove on? Did I really unplug the nail dryer and leave the stove on? I had almost washed all of the dishes, but stopped just short of right on time to leave; my producer brain was on fire and wanted more pancakes, but however hard I tried I could not find where I had placed my EBT card; probably for the better—celebrities didn't carry EBT cards, and even my awkward general being thrown off by the doorman or security— —whichever I wasn't sure— standing outside of the roller rink— probably ice this time of year, by the looks of the Zamboni in the foreground of it… ‘Don't stop writing, no matter what. ‘ Dammit, dammit dammit— That seems inappropriate. I told you to get this motherfucker out of my peripheral before something— Nevermind, don't write that. [redacted] (But imma remember this shit cause it's heavy.) A remarkable and accidental tableau, My feet flat to the floor, as my ankles bare, This is my only pair of hole-less socks. I feel so much better with my back against the wall and Listening to mau5 and, Not giving a fuck about the music playing Or the people watching But keeping it for later Forgetting how to codeswitch, Just an ever so limited existence Trying not to stick out like a sore thumb in the wrong world It's a long way up, But even longer way down, And in all the demoralizing humiliation and emasculation, I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all, No mana I realized my son's Lego Lamborghini should be waiting for me as I returned to my apartment in Brooklyn probably starting but pretending not to care; I winced at everything— this was a dangerous disaster, to even be in the building at all and edging closer to death were the secrets I kept that were not only secrets, but non existences. Nothing in nothing and nothing— Oh shit, is the suffering done? This is the end of the End of the end It's the Beginning of the end It's the end of the beginning This will be the end Of the end Of the end, This will be the end of the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning Of the end Of the beginning of the end. This will be the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning of the beginning Of the end of the end Of the beginning Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the end Of the end Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning, The beginning of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end (This will be the end) Of the beginning This will be the beginning The beginning of the beginning Of the end My friends. LET US COMMECE! All of it, this is recorded history, Smoke and mirrors, here portions and pardons This is probably why can't breathe at the rock Was I here last time; I choked last time I wrote nothing remarkable at all (Nothing remarkable at all.) I love getting lost at the rock Okay, this is the host— This is the host of the show (I think I lost my lunch before.) I was at a show, I never woke up, Okay; This is the host This is the host (This is the host) This is the host. Cue the Nirvana; Curtains go up, I don't want to see the show, I just want to host it. I don't want to get lost no more On the way to the rock Or the store Cause only one train goes there I wanna climb the straits to the top Get lost at the rock, Guess this isn't he host huh This is the lost god, That was a long walk The top of the rock off is a long jump And I'm still in talks how's every morning Someone told me not to ignore you So, this is the host, huh. Someone told me, go hard or go home (Almost time tknkove) Parenthesises, please and—Parenthetical, hypotheticals and paleontology's, Please, I need a mixologist (And anthologist) Please slow down to peace, Mr poltergeist, Please Mr poltergeist The ghost of Mr giest I'm doing a hiest Please, slow down mister poltergeist, Please for the peace Mr. Poltergeist, Or what have you? How old are you, 40. I'm the whole medium and still, Nice to meat you sir. A house made of mediums I hope that shock, And I hop to the rock there's still something in it A pogo stick Or a poltergeist Slow down, poltergeist. Terrible timing, Victoria Beckham and monsuier, Please Mr, I mean it no more— If I'm Mr ooltergieat (A policeman and polgergeist) Please, sir, no jokes. All sandwhich, no buns and pastrmi, And all the God, I'm going cold, I'm going ghost again And a the god, on all the rocks, I'm going old, I'm going cold again; On all the God on all the rocks, I'm going God, I'm going old again Hold on again, mi got a song again? I'm just a serviceman WATCH OUT FOR THE DOORMAN. MORE FUEL. So all the Rockerfeller plazas on all the earths aim alll yhr parallel dimensions can actually communicate with each other RADIO CITY BABBBBBBBYYYYYYY! OH GOD. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE Did you get his dog's name!? I think so. Good. [meniacal rubbing of hands] good. Cue the nirvana. Cue the m— Mitosis. The migos. Nah, I can't catch the flow. There it is. [the flow is a literal] Something medicinal in this meniacal, is this I spy a specscle, monocle— monopoly, Time to go, it's the devil at my left; Time for the fight against darkness, And it all is, Cause this is the ark, Noah This is the arc, God. This is apartheid and apart from that. You're fired. What. You heard me. But—I'm Seth Meyers. That's debatable. I am! I'm Seth Meyers. If you say so. This is nonsense. It's not nonsense. It is nonsense. And it's also impossible; cause this is my show. It's my show, I'M SETH MEYERS. Debatable, Not debatable. I'm ME. THAT'S ME. Debatable. I can't even hear the words, But the bass is so fire, I summon Shazam! …I want a ham sandwhich. Oh good! He's alive. Ham. Sandwhich. What the fuck happened buddy?! Where were you man?! —Zoolander. What. disleylandhamsandwhich. Get him a sandwhich!!!!! YO QUIERO CUBANO. Here's your sandwhich. CUBANO. Remember what you look like Who you are What your place is What you weigh, And Check your status Remember how still started What your mark is And what happened to your wallet; Did you leave the stove on Do you put the show on; Did you miss your mark Your mom was hotter Please remember the circumstances In which you—- [BLACKOUT] After several days gone completely missing, Jimmy Fallon is found under the craft services table sleeping peacefully. The apparatus I entered in with Is not adjusted to this condition The biometrics are non concurrent; {enter the multiverse} I felt tragic. By the time I got back to my apartment, my ribcage was showing again—although I had only been wearing one waist trainer, it was the skimpy one, and it was already wearing, it was after all eight dollars. Really and once and for all, something had come over me at Rockerfeller plaza that I didn't understand. I was more awkward and nervous than usual, and sure that I should have eaten, but couldn't —even after a long gym session, there was no time for food before the show, and I had no stomach for it. I chose to as much as I could ignore the code switching, and the more I picked it up, the further my mind began to drift. —a door slammed. My documents were probably compromised, and my phone hacked which I might have guessed, but continuing the thought I had often wondered how or why anything could have possibly known what I had written, or how—or how anyone would know what I had written, or of the things I had written, and most importantly of all—what did I write?! Most of the previous months' entries into the festival project were a blank, and the time I had spent considerably enough sifting through whatever masked man acting in part of Fallon, whoever he really was had been turbulent, as if I had been disfigured to be brainwashed into half a mind—then, slowly peeking back the layers of such a chaotic artifact of time and this, Seth Meyers, to whom now I had become a loyal fan, an actual fan—and had noticed something ingenuously crafted here. A genuine and talented, very kind and gifted man, who was not in any sense miserable or in peril. Peril, so to speak, as I remembered the almost villainous approach that the decent into madness had accompanied this Fallon and his mask, and besides this was the assumption that Seth Meyers, though professionally trained as such, seemed happy. Fallon did not. We had all learned to craft masks in order to protect our inner selves—however, with such a veil lifted as the partitioned screen of all does, this spoke to me with numerous volumes and sometimes even screamed, with the ethics of no worse a gentleman than some surgeon soldier or sailor and no more a nobleman than a king or god itself; I had not been Shocked and all but murmured even to just the slightest gawk of just an awkward cry, a muster of some shallow disaster which had called me to all of them— to whom I had loved and yet somehow not known, at least being here—and here I was, slightly convulsed, bearing no armor and gripping at the fortitude of death's barriers; On wheels with no bearings plummeted towards a forged death of sorts, by my own hands but also at the hands of others, the forgery calling from the halls of a place I had known as once my own fortress; but was no more. I belonged and now, almost with gratitude, to the eye of all gods, and all things that moved. No cherished nature, perhaps, was this into my own eye, but of disgust for what I had not yet accomplished, and still might never— I was a skull and crossbones with no love, and nothing known at all besides my own. —Tales of a superstar DJ “16 Songs” I got it. What's that. The thing that sets Seth Meyers apart from the other hosts. What is it? Seth Meyers is not a host—he's an anchor. Goddammit, you're right . I know I'm right. GODDAMIT. It just took me this long to figure it out . Great. Now how long's it gonna get you to take this thing fixed. Possibly forever. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

HEY. …hello. [breaks shit] Oh. [he grabs the man by the collar] You— —aren't you the kid from that one movie— —I'm the kid from your mom's house! —that's major disrespectful— —I'll tell you what; Okay?! —you—are going to grow a mustache. What! Why! Because you are! That's not going to look good at all! Exactly my point “The Worst Mustache Ever” [the super buff dude forces the man to swallow two large capsules] NO! YES, actually. WHAT WAS THAT. Testosterone. Happy hair-ing. What am I supposed to grow a mustache for? JUST DO IT! How are you still on that? BECAUSE I'M STUCK IN A LOOP! This plane is about to go down. What. lol do I look like I have Down's syndrome? Yes. Good. Let's go see the show: Meanwhile. lol wtf is wrong with Nvm. No. Hold the fuck on. What the fuck is wrong with Gwenyth Paltrow? Who?! EXACTLY. {Enter The Multiverse} Well, surely, you must know— No. Well, then you probably. Also, no. Well then— No. Not at all. I don't know anything; You don't even know what I was about to say! I don't know any of these people. How do you not remember anything? I was blacked out! The whole time. Predominately. Man. I feel like shit, Right? …wanna do it again? This nigga don't see; Invisibility cloak over your head Like my rhymes be; Jesus Christ it is, Icy biz Damn I lost my cadence. Something about the wizard of oz. Man I'm slow as fuck right now. Well, let's speed up then. Come on, now, I don't got all day. I'm entirely sure the whole point of avoidance Is to avoid. Avoid what. This: cooooooooooooool. I might actually have to shoot you now. Shoot me then. I don't give any kind of fuck. Oh you don't? No. Get out of the way. You don't give any fuck— at all. No. I just want kids. Gross. Shoot me then. This is Hopsin, I would bet— Man, the only reason I'm still listening to this song to see if he talks about his balls L E G E N D S Beat you up tech9 >< In the end linkin park Sister, TSHA>< Sedona Elohim Something is wrong My whole world went sepia tone I'm getting too old for this Show on the road and I'm bold for this I'm in a silicone mold for this I sold for this; I been all alone for this You picked a winner— I wrote a movie then took him to dinner; Wrote me a verse so hard, Hard er called me a jiggger Sure Take a picture it'll last longer Shut up, take your top off Don't call me a bitch in front of my kids, Or I'll run off ‍♀️ I forgot about my coffee It's cold now I been inside all day Thinking bout dying alone Wrote a letter (I burned it) Wrote a whole show But I don't know what it's about At all I think about a gunshot wound Straight to the head Almost every day of my life I used to jump the train Out of ideation, Now, I admire More blunt force trauma More lost love, huh. A harbored fugitive I should dwindle it down; It was me at the end of that rope, eh? (It sure was.) Crocodile tears, And a mile of paid programming Now where were you, Onto us— Or just steady bearing Good news, As they were— Tight noose, As it was— Loose strings, And hard knocks— Square knots and A lot of hats. Did you wan to fulfill our synthesis to symphonies yet? I barred in carriage to see that I wilted away in his essence Then, greetings; anchored in agony And weathered in women, Fearing agreements. Tethered here now and forever, As if— A hollow ball on candlestick To which no court belongs. Surely, you could see yourself dying in my arms. Surely I saw forward and backwards and in neither direction was I at any point, anywhere other than what I ought to be; Where I wanted to sit exactly, At the furthest point possible Away. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

“Seth Meyers And the Cauldron of Doom” OMG— YOU have a cauldron of doom?! I have a cauldron of doom!!! DO NOT SHAKE THIS SNOWGLOBE. I had been avoiding Rockefeller plaza for months as it was, without the sometimes accidental ending up there anyway, and I thought not once but twice or three times about changing into my regular pants so that the deep pockets could hold my keys and passports sans wallet— or a purse and considered taking a notebook as well; on the list of prohibited items were backpacks and large bags, and though the dress code seemed to be null in void at all, I was happy to be able to wear my hat at least— and almost prepared to be dogged out, the last min it e change into my harem pants would probably be the comfortable choice; looking intentionally dressed down as a statement—a broad statement that I wasn't looking to be noticed at all, or trying to be noticed. The guest for the show was nearly an EGOT winner, probably younger, and definitely skinner and more beautiful than I was; a black woman, but a British woman, and it would be almost entirely impossible to think that besides Whoopi Goldberg, an American black woman would strive to win such a thing as an EGOT herself. Still, I was looking for a cure to the writer's block and crippling depression that I had been in, however—knowing who the president of Peacock was, and after the elections at all's though I knew NBC to be left-leaning— I didn't feel at all as if I would ever belong on the stage, and was quite happily taking my place as simply a fan…and audience member, though ready to creep back into obscurity, and probably more likely than not with a pint of Ben and Jerry's after the show. I had gone to see Drew Barrymore sand makeup, and would do the same, but only as a proclamation that I had read Tina Fey's book nearly religiously now rounding three times, and I almost wish I had an oversized black t-shirt which read “hot water heater” to accompany my lax look and blonde hair—a testament to her correctness standing, as the grossities of tinder loved “the blonde”, almost as if, without the hair I would be ugly, and just as much in the same breath, unworthy of such status anyway. But more than anything, I just wanted to be able to write again, at least for my own sake, and certainly not for anyone else's. I was still in hiatus, for the better, and had not completely recovered from the unbearable racism and parallel of doom the election had tossed me into with trajectory—in this world—supposedly “fascist”. I was comfortable enough in the jeans, but had nowhere to put my phone. I was ready to be dogged out and shown what a real a list celebrity looked like, and why I simply wasn't one. I left the house with a sink full of dishes, an unmade bed, and a pile of laundry unfolded—a pile of books in boxes I had collected for my son but would cost too much to send—almost as a testament to his sick I had been since the election. In this world, I was just another poor black fat single mother— a dead beat living in poverty. In trump's world, I was an ugly, poor nothing. Everywhere I had gone about the past week, the rich seemed richer and the poor poorer, the whites whiter and the blacks blacker, good gone and evil fleeting, with the return of the motorcycles and pieces of me dying, simply giving up. I planned my return to the workforce, and the eventual fortitude of my freedom; the wealthy had become more arrogant, and the rest of us more distraught. What was I going to rocketfeller plaza for, anyway? The news. My apartment was disgusting, but at least I had been to the gym—I had run the full mile and lifted and pulled, all with the gym to myself. My harem pants still felt even better, and for the first time in me months I ventured into the world in only one waist trainer. Be prepared to be [lost in a revolving door Be cool to the two dudes in blue suits goddamnit I never know where I'm going in this bitch. I can never breath in this bitch and I don't know why. How do you get lost at the rock? Like this: [Infinitely Lost at Rockafeller Plaza] This is why I avoid this place like the plague. Maybe I'm the plague. First of all, there's no track on the floor upstairs. (I've never been upstairs.) It's just store after store of ways to spend money. This is my only pair of clean socks. No shit, this is the reason practicing your mantras on the train becomes dangerous. DANGEROUS. Somewhere in the frenzy, I remember this. Frequency, however, Not yet partial to my own inner self, and empty in the array of superstardom, I become nothing, Only a spectator of celebrity— And now, suddenly. 8 remember this day Why? Suddenly, now, in the Is moment. Where I always have been, waiting for myself— I avoid Rockerfeller plaza at all costs. Why. I heard a grimlin lives here. Now is the time for Skrillex! I would really love you forever if you didn't. Que the Arc! Oh boy, this writer's block is a doozy. The only reason I had even bothered was because it was as if I had been summoned, as if something had clocked in my sense memory where, all of a sudden, looking at an unrelated picture of some kid on Tinee, with his hands covering his mouth the way that Stefon always did, made me immidiately stop whatever I was doing—probably eating tacos or pancakes, insurmountably out of bounds— and pausing the comedian I was watching instead, just to watch Stefon, and in the way that I remembered it all, it made me laugh. Although now, I knew exactly what he was talking about by the avant-grade and strangely abysmal club scene not just of the time, but of any time in New York City— and, somehow summoning a laugh even in the darkness that had been my own distraught and depression in the previous weeks, something of a belly roll laugh might have triggered something in the alrgorithm to send last minute tickets to my email in almost that exact moment. Are they going to tell me to take off my hat?! There was no dress code, They had better not tell me to take off my motherfucking hat. I won't do it. Fuck Seth Meyers . I'm not taking off my hat for Seth Meyers. Oh yeah. That's why I'm here. I found it hard to say that I was there for such a thing; I— I turned off my peripheral vision and hyperfocus. I didn't know there would be music. Goddammit. I had deleted Shazam filming for I love New York, an all but abandoned project—the writer's block had been too real, and now the real rest had come—would I laugh at anything in show show when in reality I wanted to cry? The way the lights kept going up and down as if it were intermission only slightly distracted from the fact that I had never seen a page in real life. THEY EXIST . I had never seen an actual NBC PAGE. GODDAMMIT GET THIS BLUE SUIT LOAFER WEARING MOTHERFUCKER OUT OF MY PERIPHERAL BEFORE I LOSE IT. Shoot a midget at her. What. Just do it. Don't do that. What Don't put the midget in the cannon. What! Thays's what he's here for! I'm a stunt double! This is a stunt. That's a horrible joke. That's not a joke. SHAZAM. WTF IS THIS. Some top 40 bullshit. Good, get it ( I'm never going to have any other l exposure to top 40, ever in my life. ) Congratulations, you've made the A list What?! NO FAIR. What. What does that mean. It means I can't do shit and mandatory attendance to everything. What is everything “Everythin—g.” Man, fuck this. Alright At this moment, I realize I must be some sort of autistic. Let's get this over with… I let the sound of my own mix blare in my ears to drown out the sound of whatever pop singer was on over the loud speakers; I didn't realize there would be music, and I hoped the flutter was good l. Maybe it was the lights, or whatever, but— SUNNI BLU what in the fuck dimention is this . It's the same dimension, you're just drunk. Ah. Now what? I was as uncomfortable as ever, there was a track on the higher level, but it didn't matter, the cattle call was contained inside of velvet ropes— black ones, unlike the typical red ones, and it was at this point I realized that not only had I never seen actual NBC pages— Yo, their skirts are kinda short… RIGHT. I THOUGHT THE PAGES WERE THE PARAGON OF SANCTITY! No, those are, um… Nvm. Maybe the ugly shoes distract from the shortness of their skirts on the general basis. Oh come on, nobody gives a fuck how ugly your shoes are if your skirt is that short! These are facts, Liz. No, I'm serious what dimention is this. I already told you. I had to ask for directions three times just get here. THIS IS MY LEVEL. why is your level on acid. Cause. This is—just— Where I'm at. CUT TO: Jimmy Fallon after Mardi Gras's. Come on that's not fair! {Enter The Multiverse} What exactly isn't fair?! He's in all the scenes. Well, how else are you going to explain a time traveling helicopter?! Got him. THERES MY INVISIBLE MOTORCYCLE. I'm not going to pa— Goddamn it. I'm not going to p— It actually hurt not to write and just stand there; but I still didn't feel like myself—or sound like myself—or look like myself; I was playing a character, I just didnt know who. As I moved forward in line, the music began to fade away behind me and into the nothingness that was whatever was behind, in front of, and all around me. I hated cattle calls, but after all, I was still just a fan and as the world began to fold into chaos, I realized that my pants were falling off of me, though I had been feeling fat, and walking, and running, and cycling, and protein shaking—the only thing that had gained any extra weight was my ass, which was exactly what I was intending on hiding with my same old usual harems. My blonde hair made it so that I stuck out like a sore thumb, but that didn't matter, I was a walking statement piece and almost in a fit of tears just thinking about my own status; the NBC pages probably all had crazy incredible accolades and numerous degrees and achievements—what was I, if anything at all— ? I had put the candles out, but had I left the stove on? Did I really unplug the nail dryer and leave the stove on? I had almost washed all of the dishes, but stopped just short of right on time to leave; my producer brain was on fire and wanted more pancakes, but however hard I tried I could not find where I had placed my EBT card; probably for the better—celebrities didn't carry EBT cards, and even my awkward general being thrown off by the doorman or security— —whichever I wasn't sure— standing outside of the roller rink— probably ice this time of year, by the looks of the Zamboni in the foreground of it… ‘Don't stop writing, no matter what. ‘ Dammit, dammit dammit— That seems inappropriate. I told you to get this motherfucker out of my peripheral before something— Nevermind, don't write that. [redacted] (But imma remember this shit cause it's heavy.) A remarkable and accidental tableau, My feet flat to the floor, as my ankles bare, This is my only pair of hole-less socks. I feel so much better with my back against the wall and Listening to mau5 and, Not giving a fuck about the music playing Or the people watching But keeping it for later Forgetting how to codeswitch, Just an ever so limited existence Trying not to stick out like a sore thumb in the wrong world It's a long way up, But even longer way down, And in all the demoralizing humiliation and emasculation, I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all I realize I'm no man at all, No man at all, No mana I realized my son's Lego Lamborghini should be waiting for me as I returned to my apartment in Brooklyn probably starting but pretending not to care; I winced at everything— this was a dangerous disaster, to even be in the building at all and edging closer to death were the secrets I kept that were not only secrets, but non existences. Nothing in nothing and nothing— Oh shit, is the suffering done? This is the end of the End of the end It's the Beginning of the end It's the end of the beginning This will be the end Of the end Of the end, This will be the end of the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning Of the end Of the beginning of the end. This will be the end Of the end Of the end Of the beginning of the beginning Of the end of the end Of the beginning Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the beginning Of the end Of the end Of the end This will be the end Of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning of the beginning of the beginning This will be the beginning, The beginning of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end of the end of the end This will be the end (This will be the end) Of the beginning This will be the beginning The beginning of the beginning Of the end My friends. LET US COMMECE! All of it, this is recorded history, Smoke and mirrors, here portions and pardons This is probably why can't breathe at the rock Was I here last time; I choked last time I wrote nothing remarkable at all (Nothing remarkable at all.) I love getting lost at the rock Okay, this is the host— This is the host of the show (I think I lost my lunch before.) I was at a show, I never woke up, Okay; This is the host This is the host (This is the host) This is the host. Cue the Nirvana; Curtains go up, I don't want to see the show, I just want to host it. I don't want to get lost no more On the way to the rock Or the store Cause only one train goes there I wanna climb the straits to the top Get lost at the rock, Guess this isn't he host huh This is the lost god, That was a long walk The top of the rock off is a long jump And I'm still in talks how's every morning Someone told me not to ignore you So, this is the host, huh. Someone told me, go hard or go home (Almost time tknkove) Parenthesises, please and—Parenthetical, hypotheticals and paleontology's, Please, I need a mixologist (And anthologist) Please slow down to peace, Mr poltergeist, Please Mr poltergeist The ghost of Mr giest I'm doing a hiest Please, slow down mister poltergeist, Please for the peace Mr. Poltergeist, Or what have you? How old are you, 40. I'm the whole medium and still, Nice to meat you sir. A house made of mediums I hope that shock, And I hop to the rock there's still something in it A pogo stick Or a poltergeist Slow down, poltergeist. Terrible timing, Victoria Beckham and monsuier, Please Mr, I mean it no more— If I'm Mr ooltergieat (A policeman and polgergeist) Please, sir, no jokes. All sandwhich, no buns and pastrmi, And all the God, I'm going cold, I'm going ghost again And a the god, on all the rocks, I'm going old, I'm going cold again; On all the God on all the rocks, I'm going God, I'm going old again Hold on again, mi got a song again? I'm just a serviceman WATCH OUT FOR THE DOORMAN. MORE FUEL. So all the Rockerfeller plazas on all the earths aim alll yhr parallel dimensions can actually communicate with each other RADIO CITY BABBBBBBBYYYYYYY! OH GOD. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE Did you get his dog's name!? I think so. Good. [meniacal rubbing of hands] good. Cue the nirvana. Cue the m— Mitosis. The migos. Nah, I can't catch the flow. There it is. [the flow is a literal] Something medicinal in this meniacal, is this I spy a specscle, monocle— monopoly, Time to go, it's the devil at my left; Time for the fight against darkness, And it all is, Cause this is the ark, Noah This is the arc, God. This is apartheid and apart from that. You're fired. What. You heard me. But—I'm Seth Meyers. That's debatable. I am! I'm Seth Meyers. If you say so. This is nonsense. It's not nonsense. It is nonsense. And it's also impossible; cause this is my show. It's my show, I'M SETH MEYERS. Debatable, Not debatable. I'm ME. THAT'S ME. Debatable. I can't even hear the words, But the bass is so fire, I summon Shazam! …I want a ham sandwhich. Oh good! He's alive. Ham. Sandwhich. What the fuck happened buddy?! Where were you man?! —Zoolander. What. disleylandhamsandwhich. Get him a sandwhich!!!!! YO QUIERO CUBANO. Here's your sandwhich. CUBANO. Remember what you look like Who you are What your place is What you weigh, And Check your status Remember how still started What your mark is And what happened to your wallet; Did you leave the stove on Do you put the show on; Did you miss your mark Your mom was hotter Please remember the circumstances In which you—- [BLACKOUT] After several days gone completely missing, Jimmy Fallon is found under the craft services table sleeping peacefully. The apparatus I entered in with Is not adjusted to this condition The biometrics are non concurrent; {enter the multiverse} I felt tragic. By the time I got back to my apartment, my ribcage was showing again—although I had only been wearing one waist trainer, it was the skimpy one, and it was already wearing, it was after all eight dollars. Really and once and for all, something had come over me at Rockerfeller plaza that I didn't understand. I was more awkward and nervous than usual, and sure that I should have eaten, but couldn't —even after a long gym session, there was no time for food before the show, and I had no stomach for it. I chose to as much as I could ignore the code switching, and the more I picked it up, the further my mind began to drift. —a door slammed. My documents were probably compromised, and my phone hacked which I might have guessed, but continuing the thought I had often wondered how or why anything could have possibly known what I had written, or how—or how anyone would know what I had written, or of the things I had written, and most importantly of all—what did I write?! Most of the previous months' entries into the festival project were a blank, and the time I had spent considerably enough sifting through whatever masked man acting in part of Fallon, whoever he really was had been turbulent, as if I had been disfigured to be brainwashed into half a mind—then, slowly peeking back the layers of such a chaotic artifact of time and this, Seth Meyers, to whom now I had become a loyal fan, an actual fan—and had noticed something ingenuously crafted here. A genuine and talented, very kind and gifted man, who was not in any sense miserable or in peril. Peril, so to speak, as I remembered the almost villainous approach that the decent into madness had accompanied this Fallon and his mask, and besides this was the assumption that Seth Meyers, though professionally trained as such, seemed happy. Fallon did not. We had all learned to craft masks in order to protect our inner selves—however, with such a veil lifted as the partitioned screen of all does, this spoke to me with numerous volumes and sometimes even screamed, with the ethics of no worse a gentleman than some surgeon soldier or sailor and no more a nobleman than a king or god itself; I had not been Shocked and all but murmured even to just the slightest gawk of just an awkward cry, a muster of some shallow disaster which had called me to all of them— to whom I had loved and yet somehow not known, at least being here—and here I was, slightly convulsed, bearing no armor and gripping at the fortitude of death's barriers; On wheels with no bearings plummeted towards a forged death of sorts, by my own hands but also at the hands of others, the forgery calling from the halls of a place I had known as once my own fortress; but was no more. I belonged and now, almost with gratitude, to the eye of all gods, and all things that moved. No cherished nature, perhaps, was this into my own eye, but of disgust for what I had not yet accomplished, and still might never— I was a skull and crossbones with no love, and nothing known at all besides my own. —Tales of a superstar DJ “16 Songs” I got it. What's that. The thing that sets Seth Meyers apart from the other hosts. What is it? Seth Meyers is not a host—he's an anchor. Goddammit, you're right . I know I'm right. GODDAMIT. It just took me this long to figure it out . Great. Now how long's it gonna get you to take this thing fixed. Possibly forever. Entaer The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

HEY. …hello. [breaks shit] Oh. [he grabs the man by the collar] You— —aren't you the kid from that one movie— —I'm the kid from your mom's house! —that's major disrespectful— —I'll tell you what; Okay?! —you—are going to grow a mustache. What! Why! Because you are! That's not going to look good at all! Exactly my point “The Worst Mustache Ever” [the super buff dude forces the man to swallow two large capsules] NO! YES, actually. WHAT WAS THAT. Testosterone. Happy hair-ing. What am I supposed to grow a mustache for? JUST DO IT! How are you still on that? BECAUSE I'M STUCK IN A LOOP! This plane is about to go down. What. lol do I look like I have Down's syndrome? Yes. Good. Let's go see the show: Meanwhile. lol wtf is wrong with Nvm. No. Hold the fuck on. What the fuck is wrong with Gwenyth Paltrow? Who?! EXACTLY. {Enter The Multiverse} Well, surely, you must know— No. Well, then you probably. Also, no. Well then— No. Not at all. I don't know anything; You don't even know what I was about to say! I don't know any of these people. How do you not remember anything? I was blacked out! The whole time. Predominately. Man. I feel like shit, Right? …wanna do it again? This nigga don't see; Invisibility cloak over your head Like my rhymes be; Jesus Christ it is, Icy biz Damn I lost my cadence. Something about the wizard of oz. Man I'm slow as fuck right now. Well, let's speed up then. Come on, now, I don't got all day. I'm entirely sure the whole point of avoidance Is to avoid. Avoid what. This: cooooooooooooool. I might actually have to shoot you now. Shoot me then. I don't give any kind of fuck. Oh you don't? No. Get out of the way. You don't give any fuck— at all. No. I just want kids. Gross. Shoot me then. This is Hopsin, I would bet— Man, the only reason I'm still listening to this song to see if he talks about his balls L E G E N D S Beat you up tech9 >< In the end linkin park Sister, TSHA>< Sedona Elohim Something is wrong My whole world went sepia tone I'm getting too old for this Show on the road and I'm bold for this I'm in a silicone mold for this I sold for this; I been all alone for this You picked a winner— I wrote a movie then took him to dinner; Wrote me a verse so hard, Hard er called me a jiggger Sure Take a picture it'll last longer Shut up, take your top off Don't call me a bitch in front of my kids, Or I'll run off ‍♀️ I forgot about my coffee It's cold now I been inside all day Thinking bout dying alone Wrote a letter (I burned it) Wrote a whole show But I don't know what it's about At all I think about a gunshot wound Straight to the head Almost every day of my life I used to jump the train Out of ideation, Now, I admire More blunt force trauma More lost love, huh. A harbored fugitive I should dwindle it down; It was me at the end of that rope, eh? (It sure was.) Crocodile tears, And a mile of paid programming Now where were you, Onto us— Or just steady bearing Good news, As they were— Tight noose, As it was— Loose strings, And hard knocks— Square knots and A lot of hats. Did you wan to fulfill our synthesis to symphonies yet? I barred in carriage to see that I wilted away in his essence Then, greetings; anchored in agony And weathered in women, Fearing agreements. Tethered here now and forever, As if— A hollow ball on candlestick To which no court belongs. Surely, you could see yourself dying in my arms. Surely I saw forward and backwards and in neither direction was I at any point, anywhere other than what I ought to be; Where I wanted to sit exactly, At the furthest point possible Away. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

Mark Staats, voorzitter NVM over brandbrief strenge regels woningmarkt by Haarlem105

Onlinesupermarkt Crisp heeft de broekriem aangehaald. Het bedrijf heeft vorig jaar 10% van het personeel op zijn hoofdkantoor in Amsterdam ontslagen. Mede daardoor maakt Crisp sinds juni operationele winst in Nederland. In de loop van 2025 moet het bedrijf in zijn geheel, de websuper is ook in België actief, winstgevend zijn. Hoe ze dat willen aanpakken, hoor je van retailredacteur Julia Cornelissen. Lees: Onlinesuper Crisp maakt na reorganisatie winst in Nederland   De toekomst van de Nederlandse laadpalenproducent EVBox is plots onzeker. Het Franse moederbedrijf Engie zou het bedrijf op zeer korte termijn willen sluiten nu de laadpalenproducent al een tijd noodlijdend is. Martijn Pols legt uit wat er aan de hand is en vertelt waarom de verkoop van EVBox – ondanks interesse – niet is geslaagd. Lees: Toekomst EVBox zeer ongewis na mislukken verkoop door moeder Engie  De huizenprijzen stegen de afgelopen maanden minder hard dan in het voorjaar. Op kwartaalbasis ging het om een geringe stijging van 0,4%, zo blijkt uit de nieuwe kwartaalcijfers van makelaarsvereniging NVM. Toch is de woningmarkt onverminderd krap en verhit, concludeert de makerlaarsvereniging. Woningmarktredacteur Bas Knoop vertelt hoe het ervoor staat met de woningmarkt en blikt vooruit. Lees: Makelaars: huizenprijzen stabiliseren op kwartaalbasis  Redactie: Jildou Beiboer en Anna de Haas  Presentatie: Anna de Haas See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

'koi.' Collection II - 'antithesis.' Track 03. - 'koi.' Prod. By Blū Tha Gürū. They said I must never go black— Or I may not come back— And so I decided, upon that day, that I must go black, whilst also being able to still “go back” and so— I became— …”Jack Black” So what was your name before, then? …that's not important. [The IMPENETRABLE TEN] Tina Fey - the boss of things and people's Yeah, but what's her power? That is her power I'm not doing this show! You are doing this show. Amy Peohler or however you spell it Gazunrite. You're—welcome? What's her power? Fear of NOTHING. (And I mean absolutely nothing. ) At all. Ever. Maya Rudolph - is actually an ancient psyc mystic who crafts potions, casts spells, enchants objects, and crafts vehicles capable of entering interdimensional hyperspace, Ratchel Dratch - power over cats — as many as all the cats in the world at once, sometimes, even. Kristen Wiig- bewilderment - bedazzling Kristen Shaal mindfuckery/ mindbowing Melissa Mccarthy - general shapeshifting and miscellaneous. Miscellaneous? The Cosmic Avenger Damn. That dude lost his whole name. He lost everything. What's his power. Shut up. (Whatever.) So what are the rest of their names, then? What, they want names? I just figured out their powers! (Besides shape shifting and scaring the everlivingshit out of people—) AIGH! *toots* (Sometimes literally.) Are we really sinking low enough to do fart jokes? Are we really squatting low enough to actually— *toots* {Enter The Multiverse} Yes. “The Toot Fairy” What! Which one is that! (I'll let you figure it out.) MS. CELLANEOUS. MISS CILANEOUS? MIS— That's— MELISSA MCCARTHY OBVIOUSLY, it's me—right? It's me? It's— whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S CUT TO: Oh, I get it— They're Taylor swifting me! Taylor swifting is the act of making threatning or frightening gestures to a future celebrity in order to make them jump, react or flinch. [Taylor Swift] As you can see, this has worked miraculously well. [shit blows up] People screaming, panicking— Trampling, stampeding TAYLOR SWIFT -_- {Enter The Multiverse} SETH MCFARLENE Only ever pretty much says *giggity* And— Yee. —and nobody is sure that its even him the whole time, or just like— [another alien shapeshifter] Giggity. Yee. His entire character arch is literally almost having no other lines, to his frustration, as he tries to communicate his wants and needs, but cannot. (throwing his arms up in frustration) YEE. *big mad* GIGGITY. CUT TO: WHERE ARE MY PANTS? YONCÉ, WHERE'S THAT COFEE? I'M COMING, JESUS– JESUS Watch it. Amen. If you drop that watermelon, i'll kill you. Oh NO! Ok. Ok. [pause] Now, run. DON'T DROP THE SOAP. WHAT *SOAP* W000000AHHH. THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL. THIS IS OUT OF– GOD I got this. GOD, YOU'RE DRUNK You know, this one was almost right– You got your dopplegangers? UH huh. Alright. Come on. Hm. Wait. Just make sure s/he– Is it a “she” Whatever, come on. Just make sure she sees you. Look. I just got. A lot on my mind right now, I can't write this. GOF I got this. Wtf is going on HERE. VO. Hmm let me guess YOUNG JACK BLACK [Insert here] Close enough. I got this. Something, something– lalala OK, GET ME OUT OF THIS MOVIE GET ME OUT OF THIS PARTY. I WANT TO GO HOME. GOD, GO HOME, YOU'RE DRUNK. THIS IS MY HOUSE. That's right. It's your HOUSE: GODDAMN RIGHT IT IS. SO go HOME. GOD YOu know what. You're right. I don't need this. FInally. God, she's so wasted. Where's my Keys? OKay, now i'm understanding DRIVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Jesus, this thing just goes on and Look at this point , ALICIA KEYS I'm on it. GOD is writing this, i'm just– An actor, I guess. TV-MA Drama When the— [The Festival Project ™ ] Nvm? I guess!? RITA is the first AI designed specifically with asset protection in mind— RITA, protect my assets. LATER: RITA (robotic voice, but gangster) Yo, Peter. RITA [robotic AI voice] This mother fucker right here actually tried to play me for a fool. Please elaborate, RITA RITA Divulging plot for political assasination and asset liquidation… In the heights Complications Man, it's just crazy how they assimilated you with reverence What exactly does that even mean? Let's find out You know what? You're right. Reverend. Major Tom. Sire! You must come quickly. Must I? You must *must DIE!* For what? No time for an explanation, the page is turning SN-TRASHFREE-4XR4-ZV6W-4ZR4-VYA9 It ain't easy being supa me So I switch it to sunni b So sweet, I'm a honey be Money don't mean a thing If I ain't got no love in it I been craving some Mickey d's But I'm vegan, so luckily My energy is tripling Three threes, I bet your listening I'm livin in the Kingdom of Heaven yes I'm blessed, kids; That was just a test, kids -ū It's true, this: I didn't want to do this: I'm sick of this Sunnï Blū shit If orange is the new black And hello yellow Like pikachu, I choose too Pull it like a loose tooth, Loose change, two strange truths To shoot thru Pull up in AK I might shoot ū LA one day, Uptown A Confused YouTube Today to JFK Poof, dude! I'm the toothe fairy You should bury me—like seeds I grow trees and I Speak in tongues, (just like cree, RIP, though) You can't scare me, I don't care And I'm too aware of you Tie you to a chair And I'm preparing you for Cake, bitch Happy Birthday, I'm famous, baby just don't— Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Maybe I spoke too soon I opened your notebook, so consumer Prove me wrong but I could be much blonder And I could have two sons And one less drunk Ex-husband (That's funny, don't.) Shh. Don't bring it up again Cause it's beginning to ruffle feathers My expressions of these deep regressions No regrets though, I begets flow, 10 doors open every time One closes, So Portal— I got my foot in all of em I'm walking awkward, Cause my cock is swinging To the theme of Johnny Cochran This is not as seen on TV but amen Just promise, if you gon leave We gone stay friends, Like Jennifer Aniston Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Curiosity has just killed two cats But the truth is, I just wanted the algorithm to see me Confused as to Who switched with him This isn't him, I'll admit: the one that's meant for me Or was, at least, Again, adjust my misery and memories With sympathies for something haunting me In dreams an frequencies Please, believe me I needed you And might still need Somebody Everybody's nothing but just a body or a hobby Not a husband, or a daughter, Or a son: All I lost was Over Okay, stop it What you've got to know is: Every time this lady sings this song, Something amazing happens– What is so great about this– I don't get it. But like, Behind her. Every time. Does not disappoint What do you want from me? Ooh, it's bad . What don't I want from you? [BILLIE ELLISH'S Grammies begin singing in a harmony, forming a great symphony. She doubles back, pausing for a moment—then shrugging it off, before a grand gesture I'm on my hands and knees Just seeing dreams Whatare you saving it for What are you saving it for Grocery store horror show Slow motion drum roll What are you saving it for What are you saving it for I'd rather a friend than a father figure Video games and department show shopping Discretion and internet interests, Never more than the start in Athens The triad, the triggers You promised! Though not as important Of the promise you once made No more arguments, man It's like all of a sudden, She loves me again But it doesn't take back all the things she said All the things she did All the things I did For the things she did All the things she said For the things she did The things she said The things she said Plant a seed, let it grow Let it breathe, don't you know Take it easy, the day off Don't say a word, Don't move a muscle Easy, easy on the eyes Easy, easier on the years Shivers on the mark of the beast Cause it's been 6 years at least Since he— Don't do it: Time moves different here, In the 9th dimension Light a candle, spread some ashes on some Simple synchronicities Remember me When you forget yourself To be remembered remember the family Fame, defiling, misfortune The torture The fortune My name up in lights on the awning I'm under In some google drive A long drive out from Boston Bassoon in my onyx My name in the Name in the Cherubs on the tusks Cheeriot on top I polished off a box of cereal On some rooftop Just earlier, Thanks for the reminder. Imm burned as the beats on the countertop Burned, like the end of the gun Could have forgotten your number Could have figured the father for Dollars I've got in the [The Festival Project ™] The pleasure sensors Changing with the wind —I have a lot to do today Staring at the plague Became the fit To get the fitness in her Seven sacred songs she's writing Kept beneath her pillow Like a gunfight But who moved faster!? She wished and then became another Never narrow eyes Or birds of feather Playing games and praying Saving for yourself Only the best part Remember then The games we played At heavens gates From light, Eternal Death (The plague, the plague) Fastened in your monster, Facinating embers in your memory You thought you'd burned But are awakened once again Playing in your memory For time, the shadow Waiting under blue light In your room (The plague, the plague) Move over Four hours in the light, and 20 in the shadows; A good man always does Bad things, With a family. Staying balanced, 20 icons becoming unmantled 20 eyes, and only one soul One, God But it runs the whole world, Don't it! I want a dozen donuts, And one more problem 20 Hours in the Dark, For four hours or so, We're rolling. I meditated a home in Zion In Athens, in Rome, once The only problem was, It was pro- Pompei part one. (I'm gonna go off.) Don't you get it, Ms. That depositing your money In my spank bank Is paying you a compliment? Don't you know that I love you? We have the same taste in men! Don't you know that I love God, And she wouldn't steer me wrong about That one object, I've been Dying my eyes on And plucking my blondes Doing wall squats I love all mantras Old classic cars, —flavored sparking water I love jackets And purses And politics Irons And orgasms I love what I love And a curse is a curse— For a robot But I woke up with blood in my boner And mugs full of coffee I'm on God (Keep slamming the door, you'll get older.) I'm growing backwards like Benjamin button That's Benjamin Franklin And frankly Thomas Edison died —whose that check complimenting? I want a divorce And a shovel Police report promises Amazon out of my arteries Objects and all of the Things that I want That God promised For watching Tonight Show (the one starring Carson) I picked Jack Paar. That wasn't an option. Well, that's my choice. Fine, but you're not winning any arguments with that one. What arguments. Nobody knows who that guy is. I can name them in order The dojo was open this morning The Dodji was functional; All Aliocha For all of my Honest to God, I want water and salt At the same time Where'd you go when you died? Looking for you! That— !! I was there the whole time. INT. NEW YORK. DAY Bad decisions were indeed about to be made. The time is currently frozen. Speaking of frozen… let it GO. I don't know. I've been fascinated with the talking heads lately…I think that might be one of them. No, this is more like scary monsters —and super creeps. Hm. I'll have to admit— This is getting quite interesting; Oh, hello. First, there was the ghost of Johnny Carson. How do you do? How do you do? That guy is wild af. Or was. Now there's this Jack Paar Guy, who I'm sure is somehow…. Oh, the magic of television! Is it possible that The Devil could be using this man as a disguise to hant me with temptation, and bend my mind? It is possible that Jimmy Fallon is the devil himself, yes. I doubt that. I frankly don't, in fact. I'd yet at all discovered what his true placement within the hierarchy were; an obvious workhorse, and successful operative— this man was indeed being used by someone or something— but the only question left standing was— WHO? Don't you touch that man. He's fragile. There, there. I've become quite belligerent lately and my intentions are no longer as certain even to myself as they once were before— but definitely not to anyone else. Is there anyone else? I thought you should know, they've found your letter. Which letter, exactly? Aha, alright— That's enough, now. Heathens. Whatever. Stay out of my way. Stay out of my face. I'll try not to pose as a camera. What the fuck are you doing? I'm taking a nap. How could you sleep like this?! I'm not sleeping like that. I'm sleeping like this. whatever. Didn't I tell you before to lay off of it? I did lay off of it. It kept laying back on. And? And?! What do you want? I've got mind controlled robot drones circling my block, one to the left of my apartment and one to my right. I might be the only free thinking person in this neighborhood for miles. And you've chosen with all of your free thoughts to think about Jimmy Fallon? I've chosen not to talk about the recurring thoughts that I can't talk about—- And chosen to focus on the multiple dramas interwoven into the project which may- or-may- not involve a handful of like-minded and equally skilled monologuists and top not performers as such Oh, nevermind—- I figured out what he was, after all. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S No, that was the other one. It's gonna be really hard for me to sit here and not slap the shit out of you. I can't feel, anyway. (Shrugs) all for the best. Strawberry cornbread. That does sound good. Whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū

'koi.' Collection II - 'antithesis.' Track 03. - 'koi.' Prod. By Blū Tha Gürū. They said I must never go black— Or I may not come back— And so I decided, upon that day, that I must go black, whilst also being able to still “go back” and so— I became— …”Jack Black” So what was your name before, then? …that's not important. [The IMPENETRABLE TEN] Tina Fey - the boss of things and people's Yeah, but what's her power? That is her power I'm not doing this show! You are doing this show. Amy Peohler or however you spell it Gazunrite. You're—welcome? What's her power? Fear of NOTHING. (And I mean absolutely nothing. ) At all. Ever. Maya Rudolph - is actually an ancient psyc mystic who crafts potions, casts spells, enchants objects, and crafts vehicles capable of entering interdimensional hyperspace, Ratchel Dratch - power over cats — as many as all the cats in the world at once, sometimes, even. Kristen Wiig- bewilderment - bedazzling Kristen Shaal mindfuckery/ mindbowing Melissa Mccarthy - general shapeshifting and miscellaneous. Miscellaneous? The Cosmic Avenger Damn. That dude lost his whole name. He lost everything. What's his power. Shut up. (Whatever.) So what are the rest of their names, then? What, they want names? I just figured out their powers! (Besides shape shifting and scaring the everlivingshit out of people—) AIGH! *toots* (Sometimes literally.) Are we really sinking low enough to do fart jokes? Are we really squatting low enough to actually— *toots* {Enter The Multiverse} Yes. “The Toot Fairy” What! Which one is that! (I'll let you figure it out.) MS. CELLANEOUS. MISS CILANEOUS? MIS— That's— MELISSA MCCARTHY OBVIOUSLY, it's me—right? It's me? It's— whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S CUT TO: Oh, I get it— They're Taylor swifting me! Taylor swifting is the act of making threatning or frightening gestures to a future celebrity in order to make them jump, react or flinch. [Taylor Swift] As you can see, this has worked miraculously well. [shit blows up] People screaming, panicking— Trampling, stampeding TAYLOR SWIFT -_- {Enter The Multiverse} SETH MCFARLENE Only ever pretty much says *giggity* And— Yee. —and nobody is sure that its even him the whole time, or just like— [another alien shapeshifter] Giggity. Yee. His entire character arch is literally almost having no other lines, to his frustration, as he tries to communicate his wants and needs, but cannot. (throwing his arms up in frustration) YEE. *big mad* GIGGITY. CUT TO: WHERE ARE MY PANTS? YONCÉ, WHERE'S THAT COFEE? I'M COMING, JESUS– JESUS Watch it. Amen. If you drop that watermelon, i'll kill you. Oh NO! Ok. Ok. [pause] Now, run. DON'T DROP THE SOAP. WHAT *SOAP* W000000AHHH. THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL. THIS IS OUT OF– GOD I got this. GOD, YOU'RE DRUNK You know, this one was almost right– You got your dopplegangers? UH huh. Alright. Come on. Hm. Wait. Just make sure s/he– Is it a “she” Whatever, come on. Just make sure she sees you. Look. I just got. A lot on my mind right now, I can't write this. GOF I got this. Wtf is going on HERE. VO. Hmm let me guess YOUNG JACK BLACK [Insert here] Close enough. I got this. Something, something– lalala OK, GET ME OUT OF THIS MOVIE GET ME OUT OF THIS PARTY. I WANT TO GO HOME. GOD, GO HOME, YOU'RE DRUNK. THIS IS MY HOUSE. That's right. It's your HOUSE: GODDAMN RIGHT IT IS. SO go HOME. GOD YOu know what. You're right. I don't need this. FInally. God, she's so wasted. Where's my Keys? OKay, now i'm understanding DRIVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Jesus, this thing just goes on and Look at this point , ALICIA KEYS I'm on it. GOD is writing this, i'm just– An actor, I guess. TV-MA Drama When the— [The Festival Project ™ ] Nvm? I guess!? RITA is the first AI designed specifically with asset protection in mind— RITA, protect my assets. LATER: RITA (robotic voice, but gangster) Yo, Peter. RITA [robotic AI voice] This mother fucker right here actually tried to play me for a fool. Please elaborate, RITA RITA Divulging plot for political assasination and asset liquidation… In the heights Complications Man, it's just crazy how they assimilated you with reverence What exactly does that even mean? Let's find out You know what? You're right. Reverend. Major Tom. Sire! You must come quickly. Must I? You must *must DIE!* For what? No time for an explanation, the page is turning SN-TRASHFREE-4XR4-ZV6W-4ZR4-VYA9 It ain't easy being supa me So I switch it to sunni b So sweet, I'm a honey be Money don't mean a thing If I ain't got no love in it I been craving some Mickey d's But I'm vegan, so luckily My energy is tripling Three threes, I bet your listening I'm livin in the Kingdom of Heaven yes I'm blessed, kids; That was just a test, kids -ū It's true, this: I didn't want to do this: I'm sick of this Sunnï Blū shit If orange is the new black And hello yellow Like pikachu, I choose too Pull it like a loose tooth, Loose change, two strange truths To shoot thru Pull up in AK I might shoot ū LA one day, Uptown A Confused YouTube Today to JFK Poof, dude! I'm the toothe fairy You should bury me—like seeds I grow trees and I Speak in tongues, (just like cree, RIP, though) You can't scare me, I don't care And I'm too aware of you Tie you to a chair And I'm preparing you for Cake, bitch Happy Birthday, I'm famous, baby just don't— Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Maybe I spoke too soon I opened your notebook, so consumer Prove me wrong but I could be much blonder And I could have two sons And one less drunk Ex-husband (That's funny, don't.) Shh. Don't bring it up again Cause it's beginning to ruffle feathers My expressions of these deep regressions No regrets though, I begets flow, 10 doors open every time One closes, So Portal— I got my foot in all of em I'm walking awkward, Cause my cock is swinging To the theme of Johnny Cochran This is not as seen on TV but amen Just promise, if you gon leave We gone stay friends, Like Jennifer Aniston Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Curiosity has just killed two cats But the truth is, I just wanted the algorithm to see me Confused as to Who switched with him This isn't him, I'll admit: the one that's meant for me Or was, at least, Again, adjust my misery and memories With sympathies for something haunting me In dreams an frequencies Please, believe me I needed you And might still need Somebody Everybody's nothing but just a body or a hobby Not a husband, or a daughter, Or a son: All I lost was Over Okay, stop it What you've got to know is: Every time this lady sings this song, Something amazing happens– What is so great about this– I don't get it. But like, Behind her. Every time. Does not disappoint What do you want from me? Ooh, it's bad . What don't I want from you? [BILLIE ELLISH'S Grammies begin singing in a harmony, forming a great symphony. She doubles back, pausing for a moment—then shrugging it off, before a grand gesture I'm on my hands and knees Just seeing dreams Whatare you saving it for What are you saving it for Grocery store horror show Slow motion drum roll What are you saving it for What are you saving it for I'd rather a friend than a father figure Video games and department show shopping Discretion and internet interests, Never more than the start in Athens The triad, the triggers You promised! Though not as important Of the promise you once made No more arguments, man It's like all of a sudden, She loves me again But it doesn't take back all the things she said All the things she did All the things I did For the things she did All the things she said For the things she did The things she said The things she said Plant a seed, let it grow Let it breathe, don't you know Take it easy, the day off Don't say a word, Don't move a muscle Easy, easy on the eyes Easy, easier on the years Shivers on the mark of the beast Cause it's been 6 years at least Since he— Don't do it: Time moves different here, In the 9th dimension Light a candle, spread some ashes on some Simple synchronicities Remember me When you forget yourself To be remembered remember the family Fame, defiling, misfortune The torture The fortune My name up in lights on the awning I'm under In some google drive A long drive out from Boston Bassoon in my onyx My name in the Name in the Cherubs on the tusks Cheeriot on top I polished off a box of cereal On some rooftop Just earlier, Thanks for the reminder. Imm burned as the beats on the countertop Burned, like the end of the gun Could have forgotten your number Could have figured the father for Dollars I've got in the [The Festival Project ™] The pleasure sensors Changing with the wind —I have a lot to do today Staring at the plague Became the fit To get the fitness in her Seven sacred songs she's writing Kept beneath her pillow Like a gunfight But who moved faster!? She wished and then became another Never narrow eyes Or birds of feather Playing games and praying Saving for yourself Only the best part Remember then The games we played At heavens gates From light, Eternal Death (The plague, the plague) Fastened in your monster, Facinating embers in your memory You thought you'd burned But are awakened once again Playing in your memory For time, the shadow Waiting under blue light In your room (The plague, the plague) Move over Four hours in the light, and 20 in the shadows; A good man always does Bad things, With a family. Staying balanced, 20 icons becoming unmantled 20 eyes, and only one soul One, God But it runs the whole world, Don't it! I want a dozen donuts, And one more problem 20 Hours in the Dark, For four hours or so, We're rolling. I meditated a home in Zion In Athens, in Rome, once The only problem was, It was pro- Pompei part one. (I'm gonna go off.) Don't you get it, Ms. That depositing your money In my spank bank Is paying you a compliment? Don't you know that I love you? We have the same taste in men! Don't you know that I love God, And she wouldn't steer me wrong about That one object, I've been Dying my eyes on And plucking my blondes Doing wall squats I love all mantras Old classic cars, —flavored sparking water I love jackets And purses And politics Irons And orgasms I love what I love And a curse is a curse— For a robot But I woke up with blood in my boner And mugs full of coffee I'm on God (Keep slamming the door, you'll get older.) I'm growing backwards like Benjamin button That's Benjamin Franklin And frankly Thomas Edison died —whose that check complimenting? I want a divorce And a shovel Police report promises Amazon out of my arteries Objects and all of the Things that I want That God promised For watching Tonight Show (the one starring Carson) I picked Jack Paar. That wasn't an option. Well, that's my choice. Fine, but you're not winning any arguments with that one. What arguments. Nobody knows who that guy is. I can name them in order The dojo was open this morning The Dodji was functional; All Aliocha For all of my Honest to God, I want water and salt At the same time Where'd you go when you died? Looking for you! That— !! I was there the whole time. INT. NEW YORK. DAY Bad decisions were indeed about to be made. The time is currently frozen. Speaking of frozen… let it GO. I don't know. I've been fascinated with the talking heads lately…I think that might be one of them. No, this is more like scary monsters —and super creeps. Hm. I'll have to admit— This is getting quite interesting; Oh, hello. First, there was the ghost of Johnny Carson. How do you do? How do you do? That guy is wild af. Or was. Now there's this Jack Paar Guy, who I'm sure is somehow…. Oh, the magic of television! Is it possible that The Devil could be using this man as a disguise to hant me with temptation, and bend my mind? It is possible that Jimmy Fallon is the devil himself, yes. I doubt that. I frankly don't, in fact. I'd yet at all discovered what his true placement within the hierarchy were; an obvious workhorse, and successful operative— this man was indeed being used by someone or something— but the only question left standing was— WHO? Don't you touch that man. He's fragile. There, there. I've become quite belligerent lately and my intentions are no longer as certain even to myself as they once were before— but definitely not to anyone else. Is there anyone else? I thought you should know, they've found your letter. Which letter, exactly? Aha, alright— That's enough, now. Heathens. Whatever. Stay out of my way. Stay out of my face. I'll try not to pose as a camera. What the fuck are you doing? I'm taking a nap. How could you sleep like this?! I'm not sleeping like that. I'm sleeping like this. whatever. Didn't I tell you before to lay off of it? I did lay off of it. It kept laying back on. And? And?! What do you want? I've got mind controlled robot drones circling my block, one to the left of my apartment and one to my right. I might be the only free thinking person in this neighborhood for miles. And you've chosen with all of your free thoughts to think about Jimmy Fallon? I've chosen not to talk about the recurring thoughts that I can't talk about—- And chosen to focus on the multiple dramas interwoven into the project which may- or-may- not involve a handful of like-minded and equally skilled monologuists and top not performers as such Oh, nevermind—- I figured out what he was, after all. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S No, that was the other one. It's gonna be really hard for me to sit here and not slap the shit out of you. I can't feel, anyway. (Shrugs) all for the best. Strawberry cornbread. That does sound good. Whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū

'koi.' Collection II - 'antithesis.' Track 03. - 'koi.' Prod. By Blū Tha Gürū. They said I must never go black— Or I may not come back— And so I decided, upon that day, that I must go black, whilst also being able to still “go back” and so— I became— …”Jack Black” So what was your name before, then? …that's not important. [The IMPENETRABLE TEN] Tina Fey - the boss of things and people's Yeah, but what's her power? That is her power I'm not doing this show! You are doing this show. Amy Peohler or however you spell it Gazunrite. You're—welcome? What's her power? Fear of NOTHING. (And I mean absolutely nothing. ) At all. Ever. Maya Rudolph - is actually an ancient psyc mystic who crafts potions, casts spells, enchants objects, and crafts vehicles capable of entering interdimensional hyperspace, Ratchel Dratch - power over cats — as many as all the cats in the world at once, sometimes, even. Kristen Wiig- bewilderment - bedazzling Kristen Shaal mindfuckery/ mindbowing Melissa Mccarthy - general shapeshifting and miscellaneous. Miscellaneous? The Cosmic Avenger Damn. That dude lost his whole name. He lost everything. What's his power. Shut up. (Whatever.) So what are the rest of their names, then? What, they want names? I just figured out their powers! (Besides shape shifting and scaring the everlivingshit out of people—) AIGH! *toots* (Sometimes literally.) Are we really sinking low enough to do fart jokes? Are we really squatting low enough to actually— *toots* {Enter The Multiverse} Yes. “The Toot Fairy” What! Which one is that! (I'll let you figure it out.) MS. CELLANEOUS. MISS CILANEOUS? MIS— That's— MELISSA MCCARTHY OBVIOUSLY, it's me—right? It's me? It's— whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S CUT TO: Oh, I get it— They're Taylor swifting me! Taylor swifting is the act of making threatning or frightening gestures to a future celebrity in order to make them jump, react or flinch. [Taylor Swift] As you can see, this has worked miraculously well. [shit blows up] People screaming, panicking— Trampling, stampeding TAYLOR SWIFT -_- {Enter The Multiverse} SETH MCFARLENE Only ever pretty much says *giggity* And— Yee. —and nobody is sure that its even him the whole time, or just like— [another alien shapeshifter] Giggity. Yee. His entire character arch is literally almost having no other lines, to his frustration, as he tries to communicate his wants and needs, but cannot. (throwing his arms up in frustration) YEE. *big mad* GIGGITY. CUT TO: WHERE ARE MY PANTS? YONCÉ, WHERE'S THAT COFEE? I'M COMING, JESUS– JESUS Watch it. Amen. If you drop that watermelon, i'll kill you. Oh NO! Ok. Ok. [pause] Now, run. DON'T DROP THE SOAP. WHAT *SOAP* W000000AHHH. THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL. THIS IS OUT OF– GOD I got this. GOD, YOU'RE DRUNK You know, this one was almost right– You got your dopplegangers? UH huh. Alright. Come on. Hm. Wait. Just make sure s/he– Is it a “she” Whatever, come on. Just make sure she sees you. Look. I just got. A lot on my mind right now, I can't write this. GOF I got this. Wtf is going on HERE. VO. Hmm let me guess YOUNG JACK BLACK [Insert here] Close enough. I got this. Something, something– lalala OK, GET ME OUT OF THIS MOVIE GET ME OUT OF THIS PARTY. I WANT TO GO HOME. GOD, GO HOME, YOU'RE DRUNK. THIS IS MY HOUSE. That's right. It's your HOUSE: GODDAMN RIGHT IT IS. SO go HOME. GOD YOu know what. You're right. I don't need this. FInally. God, she's so wasted. Where's my Keys? OKay, now i'm understanding DRIVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Jesus, this thing just goes on and Look at this point , ALICIA KEYS I'm on it. GOD is writing this, i'm just– An actor, I guess. TV-MA Drama When the— [The Festival Project ™ ] Nvm? I guess!? RITA is the first AI designed specifically with asset protection in mind— RITA, protect my assets. LATER: RITA (robotic voice, but gangster) Yo, Peter. RITA [robotic AI voice] This mother fucker right here actually tried to play me for a fool. Please elaborate, RITA RITA Divulging plot for political assasination and asset liquidation… In the heights Complications Man, it's just crazy how they assimilated you with reverence What exactly does that even mean? Let's find out You know what? You're right. Reverend. Major Tom. Sire! You must come quickly. Must I? You must *must DIE!* For what? No time for an explanation, the page is turning SN-TRASHFREE-4XR4-ZV6W-4ZR4-VYA9 It ain't easy being supa me So I switch it to sunni b So sweet, I'm a honey be Money don't mean a thing If I ain't got no love in it I been craving some Mickey d's But I'm vegan, so luckily My energy is tripling Three threes, I bet your listening I'm livin in the Kingdom of Heaven yes I'm blessed, kids; That was just a test, kids -ū It's true, this: I didn't want to do this: I'm sick of this Sunnï Blū shit If orange is the new black And hello yellow Like pikachu, I choose too Pull it like a loose tooth, Loose change, two strange truths To shoot thru Pull up in AK I might shoot ū LA one day, Uptown A Confused YouTube Today to JFK Poof, dude! I'm the toothe fairy You should bury me—like seeds I grow trees and I Speak in tongues, (just like cree, RIP, though) You can't scare me, I don't care And I'm too aware of you Tie you to a chair And I'm preparing you for Cake, bitch Happy Birthday, I'm famous, baby just don't— Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Maybe I spoke too soon I opened your notebook, so consumer Prove me wrong but I could be much blonder And I could have two sons And one less drunk Ex-husband (That's funny, don't.) Shh. Don't bring it up again Cause it's beginning to ruffle feathers My expressions of these deep regressions No regrets though, I begets flow, 10 doors open every time One closes, So Portal— I got my foot in all of em I'm walking awkward, Cause my cock is swinging To the theme of Johnny Cochran This is not as seen on TV but amen Just promise, if you gon leave We gone stay friends, Like Jennifer Aniston Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Curiosity has just killed two cats But the truth is, I just wanted the algorithm to see me Confused as to Who switched with him This isn't him, I'll admit: the one that's meant for me Or was, at least, Again, adjust my misery and memories With sympathies for something haunting me In dreams an frequencies Please, believe me I needed you And might still need Somebody Everybody's nothing but just a body or a hobby Not a husband, or a daughter, Or a son: All I lost was Over Okay, stop it What you've got to know is: Every time this lady sings this song, Something amazing happens– What is so great about this– I don't get it. But like, Behind her. Every time. Does not disappoint What do you want from me? Ooh, it's bad . What don't I want from you? [BILLIE ELLISH'S Grammies begin singing in a harmony, forming a great symphony. She doubles back, pausing for a moment—then shrugging it off, before a grand gesture I'm on my hands and knees Just seeing dreams Whatare you saving it for What are you saving it for Grocery store horror show Slow motion drum roll What are you saving it for What are you saving it for I'd rather a friend than a father figure Video games and department show shopping Discretion and internet interests, Never more than the start in Athens The triad, the triggers You promised! Though not as important Of the promise you once made No more arguments, man It's like all of a sudden, She loves me again But it doesn't take back all the things she said All the things she did All the things I did For the things she did All the things she said For the things she did The things she said The things she said Plant a seed, let it grow Let it breathe, don't you know Take it easy, the day off Don't say a word, Don't move a muscle Easy, easy on the eyes Easy, easier on the years Shivers on the mark of the beast Cause it's been 6 years at least Since he— Don't do it: Time moves different here, In the 9th dimension Light a candle, spread some ashes on some Simple synchronicities Remember me When you forget yourself To be remembered remember the family Fame, defiling, misfortune The torture The fortune My name up in lights on the awning I'm under In some google drive A long drive out from Boston Bassoon in my onyx My name in the Name in the Cherubs on the tusks Cheeriot on top I polished off a box of cereal On some rooftop Just earlier, Thanks for the reminder. Imm burned as the beats on the countertop Burned, like the end of the gun Could have forgotten your number Could have figured the father for Dollars I've got in the [The Festival Project ™] The pleasure sensors Changing with the wind —I have a lot to do today Staring at the plague Became the fit To get the fitness in her Seven sacred songs she's writing Kept beneath her pillow Like a gunfight But who moved faster!? She wished and then became another Never narrow eyes Or birds of feather Playing games and praying Saving for yourself Only the best part Remember then The games we played At heavens gates From light, Eternal Death (The plague, the plague) Fastened in your monster, Facinating embers in your memory You thought you'd burned But are awakened once again Playing in your memory For time, the shadow Waiting under blue light In your room (The plague, the plague) Move over Four hours in the light, and 20 in the shadows; A good man always does Bad things, With a family. Staying balanced, 20 icons becoming unmantled 20 eyes, and only one soul One, God But it runs the whole world, Don't it! I want a dozen donuts, And one more problem 20 Hours in the Dark, For four hours or so, We're rolling. I meditated a home in Zion In Athens, in Rome, once The only problem was, It was pro- Pompei part one. (I'm gonna go off.) Don't you get it, Ms. That depositing your money In my spank bank Is paying you a compliment? Don't you know that I love you? We have the same taste in men! Don't you know that I love God, And she wouldn't steer me wrong about That one object, I've been Dying my eyes on And plucking my blondes Doing wall squats I love all mantras Old classic cars, —flavored sparking water I love jackets And purses And politics Irons And orgasms I love what I love And a curse is a curse— For a robot But I woke up with blood in my boner And mugs full of coffee I'm on God (Keep slamming the door, you'll get older.) I'm growing backwards like Benjamin button That's Benjamin Franklin And frankly Thomas Edison died —whose that check complimenting? I want a divorce And a shovel Police report promises Amazon out of my arteries Objects and all of the Things that I want That God promised For watching Tonight Show (the one starring Carson) I picked Jack Paar. That wasn't an option. Well, that's my choice. Fine, but you're not winning any arguments with that one. What arguments. Nobody knows who that guy is. I can name them in order The dojo was open this morning The Dodji was functional; All Aliocha For all of my Honest to God, I want water and salt At the same time Where'd you go when you died? Looking for you! That— !! I was there the whole time. INT. NEW YORK. DAY Bad decisions were indeed about to be made. The time is currently frozen. Speaking of frozen… let it GO. I don't know. I've been fascinated with the talking heads lately…I think that might be one of them. No, this is more like scary monsters —and super creeps. Hm. I'll have to admit— This is getting quite interesting; Oh, hello. First, there was the ghost of Johnny Carson. How do you do? How do you do? That guy is wild af. Or was. Now there's this Jack Paar Guy, who I'm sure is somehow…. Oh, the magic of television! Is it possible that The Devil could be using this man as a disguise to hant me with temptation, and bend my mind? It is possible that Jimmy Fallon is the devil himself, yes. I doubt that. I frankly don't, in fact. I'd yet at all discovered what his true placement within the hierarchy were; an obvious workhorse, and successful operative— this man was indeed being used by someone or something— but the only question left standing was— WHO? Don't you touch that man. He's fragile. There, there. I've become quite belligerent lately and my intentions are no longer as certain even to myself as they once were before— but definitely not to anyone else. Is there anyone else? I thought you should know, they've found your letter. Which letter, exactly? Aha, alright— That's enough, now. Heathens. Whatever. Stay out of my way. Stay out of my face. I'll try not to pose as a camera. What the fuck are you doing? I'm taking a nap. How could you sleep like this?! I'm not sleeping like that. I'm sleeping like this. whatever. Didn't I tell you before to lay off of it? I did lay off of it. It kept laying back on. And? And?! What do you want? I've got mind controlled robot drones circling my block, one to the left of my apartment and one to my right. I might be the only free thinking person in this neighborhood for miles. And you've chosen with all of your free thoughts to think about Jimmy Fallon? I've chosen not to talk about the recurring thoughts that I can't talk about—- And chosen to focus on the multiple dramas interwoven into the project which may- or-may- not involve a handful of like-minded and equally skilled monologuists and top not performers as such Oh, nevermind—- I figured out what he was, after all. {Enter The Multiverse} L E G E N D S No, that was the other one. It's gonna be really hard for me to sit here and not slap the shit out of you. I can't feel, anyway. (Shrugs) all for the best. Strawberry cornbread. That does sound good. Whatever. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū

Makelaarsorganisatie NVM wil dat de net aangetreden woonminister Mona Keijzer ingrijpt op de huurmarkt. Afgelopen kwartaal bereikte het aantal transacties van woningen in de vrije sector een dieptepunt en dat is komt volgens de NVM door de  Wet betaalbare huur, een politiek product van voormalig minister Hugo de Jonge. Heeft de NVM een punt, of zijn ze veel te voorbarig met deze kritiek? Met:  - Sieuwerd Ermerins, NVM - Matthijs ten Broeke, Woonbond

Let op wat je kind op Instagram uitspookt: dat was de inzet van een massale reclamecampagne van moederbedrijf Meta. Weinig Nederlandse ouders gaven gehoor aan deze oproep, blijkt uit onderzoek van BNR.  J.D. Vance heeft in een speech voor de Republikeinse conventie in Milwaukee de nominatie van zijn partij voor het vicepresidentschap aanvaard. Intussen brokkelt de steun voor Joe Biden verder versneld af. BNR's Amerika-correspondent Jan Postma doet verslag vanuit Milwaukee. De markt voor kantoren lijkt uit zijn dip te zijn gekomen. Na historisch weinig verhuur of verkoop van kantoorruimte in 2023, signaleert makelaarsvereniging NVM in de eerste helft van dit jaar weer een stijging. Maar dat komt vooral doordat werkgevers vaak in relatief grote kantoren trokken. Over deze podcast    In Ochtendnieuws hoor je in 20 minuten het belangrijkste nieuws van de dag. Abonneer je op de podcast via bnr.nl/ochtendnieuws, de BNR-app, Spotify en Apple Podcasts. Of luister elke dag live via bnr.nl/live.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Het afgelopen kwartaal stegen de huizenprijzen in Nederland tot een absolute recordhoogte. Dat bleek vorige week uit cijfers van de NVM. De mediane prijs van een koophuis lag met 468.000 euro 13,6 procent hoger. Deze hoge prijzen zijn vooral een doorn in het oog van jonge starters die op zoek zijn naar hun eerste huis.

Ondanks waarschuwingen en smeekbedes van China zet Brussel door. Chinese auto's worden fors duurder door Europese heffingen. In deze aflevering hoor je waar de chaos nu groter is: in de bestuurskamer van Volkswagen of in die van BYD. En op welke tegenmaatregelen vanuit China moet Europa zich voorbereiden? Ook gaat over Nvidia. Het aandeel breekt al een tijdje geen records meer en dus geven wij je de Nvidia's van de toekomst. Bedrijven die profiteren van de AI-golf en net zo hard kunnen groeien als Nvidia eerder deed. We verklappen alvast wat namen: United Health, Daiichi Sankyo en Nemetschek. Verder gaat het over onenigheid bij de Fed en de consequenties voor jou. Hoor je waarom Jeff Bezos in een paar maanden tijd 13,5 miljard dollar verdient. En je hoort waarom Elon Musk een overwinning heeft geboekt in China.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We've been missing for Six months because Thom wrote an Audiodrama and now our entire lives revolve around kickstarting it. Here is the first episode! The Disappearances of Lydia Fountayne follows bookish teenager Lydia who comes home one day to find her parents missing, their home ransacked, and a book that shouldn't exist waiting for her. Lydia and her friends - lovelorn Ethan and wannabe internet sensation Dee - race to discover the secrets of Lydia's identity, and the motives of her sinister relatives, before she is consumed by the decades-long feud for control over her grandfather's supernatural dominions. and a SPECIAL pitch for the book heads out there: Imagine if the Tower of Genji B&E Plotline was mashed up with the Elayne Succession Plotline, but instead of Aelfinn and Eelfinn there were Talking Birds and Nefarious Uncles in there. This audiodrama grew out of the collaboration that started with NVM the Trollocs. if it weren't for wheel of time, we would never have started Lydia! So thank you to you all for supporting this podcast and allowing this to happen, and I hope we can ask you for a little more support now! LINK TO THE KICKSTARTER Links to TWITTER, INSTAGRAM, TIKTOK, MOONSHOT TUMBLR, REDDIT POST Pls share wherever you can!

De Amerikaanse investeringsmaatschappij General Atlantic is sinds februari aandeelhouder van woningplatform Funda, met een belang van 24 procent. Maar is er met de komst van deze investeerder daadwerkelijk iets veranderd? Of heeft makelaarsvereniging én grootaandeelhouder NVM het bij Funda nog altijd voor het zeggen?  Te gast is algemeen directeur Joost Dop.  Macro met Boot   Elke dag een intrigerende gedachtewisseling over de stand van de macro-economie. Op maandag en vrijdag gaat presentator Thomas van Zijl in gesprek met econoom Arnoud Boot, de rest van de week praat Van Zijl met econoom Edin Mujagić.  Ondernemerspanel  Drie accountantskantoren gaan in zee met een investeringsmaatschappij. En: Is huisartsenketen Co-Med bezig aan zijn laatste maanden? Dat en meer bespreken we om 11.10 in het ondernemerspanel met: Wendy van Ierschot, Oprichter van VIE people en VIE Tech Capital en Leen Zevenbergen, Oprichter van B-Corps Europe, Partner bij Been Management Consulting en walnotenboer  Pitches  Elke vrijdag is het weer tijd voor jonge ondernemingen om zichzelf op de kaart te zetten. Dat doen zij via een pitch en het doorstaan van een vragenvuur. Vandaag is het de beurt aan Alexander Kalkman van Kalkman food en Daan Maasson van Mended om hun ondernemingen te pitchen!  Maasbert Schouten van MaasInvest is er om de ondernemingen te beoordelen en van advies te voorzien. Contact & Abonneren  BNR Zakendoen zendt elke werkdag live uit van 11:00 tot 13:30 uur. Je kunt de redactie bereiken via e-mail.   Abonneren op de podcast van BNR Zakendoen kan via bnr.nl/zakendoen, of via Apple Podcast en Spotify. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

De Amerikaanse investeringsmaatschappij General Atlantic is in februari definitief aandeelhouder van Funda geworden, met een belang van 24 procent. Maar is er met de komst van deze Amerikaanse partij daadwerkelijk iets veranderd bij het woningplatform? Of is het in de praktijk vooral makelaarsvereniging  en meerderheidsaandeelhouder NVM die het beleid bepaalt? In ‘De top van Nederland' een uitgebreid gesprek met Joost Dop, de topman van Funda. Presentator Thomas van Zijl vraagt hem...  - of hij blij is met de komst van General Atlantic;  - hoe hij kijkt naar de rol van de NVM binnen Funda;  - of Funda kan innoveren;  - hoe hij de toekomst van Funda voor zich ziet;  - of er een minister van Wonen moet komen.  Over Funda Real Estate  Funda, officieel Funda Real Estate, is een woningplatform – opgericht voor en door makelaars - met Nederlands onroerend goed. De website is met ruim 70 miljoen bezoekers per maand een van de drukst bezochte huizensites van Nederland.  Over Thomas van Zijl  Thomas van Zijl is financieel journalist en presentator bij BNR. Hij presenteert dagelijks ‘BNR Zakendoen', het Nederlandse radioprogramma voor economisch nieuws en zakelijk inzicht, waar 'De top van Nederland' onderdeel van is. Ook is hij een van de makers van de podcast ‘Onder curatoren'.  Abonneer je op de podcast  Ga naar ‘De top van Nederland' en abonneer je op de podcast, ook te beluisteren via Apple Podcast en Spotify. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

WHERE ARE MY PANTS? YONCÉ, WHERE'S THAT COFEE I'M COMING, JESUS– JESUS Watch it. Amen. If you drop that watermelon, i'll kill you. Oh NO! Ok. Ok. [pause] Now, run. DON'T DROP THE SOAP WHAT *SOAP* W000000AHHH. THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL. THIS IS OUT OF– GOD I got this. GOD, YOU'RE DRUNK You know, this one was almost right– You got your dopplegangers? UH huh. Alright. Come on. Hm. Wait. Just make sure s/he– Is it a “she” Whatever, come on. Just make sure she sees you. Look. I just got. A lot on my mind right now, I can't write this. GOF I got this. Wtf is going on HERE. VO. Hmm let me guess YOUNG JACK BLACK [Insert here] Close enough. I got this. Something, something– lalala OK, GET ME OUT OF THIS MOVIE GET ME OUT OF THIS PARTY. I WANT TO GO HOME. GOD, GO HOME, YOU'RE DRUNK. THIS IS MY HOUSE. That's right. It's your HOUSE: GODDAMN RIGHT IT IS. SO go HOME. GOD YOu know what. You're right. I don't need this. FInally. God, she's so wasted. Where's my Keys? OKay, now i'm understanding DRIVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Jesus, this thing just goes on and Look at this point , ALICIA KEYS I'm on it. GOD is writing this, i'm just– An actor, I guess. TV-MA Drama When the Nvm? I guess!? RITA is the first AI designed specifically with asset protection in mind— RITA, protect my assets. LATER: RITA (robotic voice, but gangster) Yo, Peter. This mother fucker right here actually tried to play me for a fool Please elaborate, RITA RITA Divulging plot for political assasination and asset liquidation In the heights Complications Man, it's just crazy how they assimilated you with reverence What exactly does that even mean? Let's find out You know what? You're right. Reverend. Major Tom. Sire! You must come quickly. Must I? You must *must DIE!* For what? No time for an explanation, the page is turning SN-TRASHFREE-4XR4-ZV6W-4ZR4-VYA9 It ain't easy being supa me So I switch it to sunni b So sweet, I'm a honey be Money don't mean a thing If I ain't got no love in it I been craving some Mickey d's But I'm vegan, so luckily My energy is tripling Three threes, I bet your listening I'm livin in the Kingdom of Heaven yes I'm blessed, kids; That was just a test, kids -ū It's true, this: I didn't want to do this: I'm sick of this Sunnï Blū shit If orange is the new black And hello yellow Like pikachu, I choose too Pull it like a loose tooth, Loose change, two strange truths To shoot thru Pull up in AK I might shoot ū LA one day, Uptown A Confused YouTube Today to JFK Poof, dude! I'm the toothe fairy You should bury me—like seeds I grow trees and I Speak in tongues, (just like cree, RIP, though) You can't scare me, I don't care And I'm too aware of you Tie you to a chair And I'm preparing you for Cake, bitch Happy Birthday, I'm famous, baby just don't— Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Maybe I spoke too soon I opened your notebook, so consumer Prove me wrong but I could be much blonder And I could have two sons And one less drunk Ex-husband (That's funny, don't.) Shh. Don't bring it up again Cause it's beginning to ruffle feathers My expressions of these deep regressions No regrets though, I begets flow, 10 doors open every time One closes, So Portal— I got my foot in all of em I'm walking awkward, Cause my cock is swinging To the theme of Johnny Cochran This is not as seen on TV but amen Just promise, if you gon leave We gone stay friends, Like Jennifer Aniston Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave Baby don't leave! Curiosity has just killed two cats But the truth is, I just wanted the algorithm to see me Confused as to Who switched with him This isn't him, I'll admit: the one that's meant for me Or was, at least, Again, adjust my misery and memories With sympathies for something haunting me In dreams an frequencies Please, believe me I needed you And might still need Somebody Everybody's nothing but just a body or a hobby Not a husband, or a daughter, Or a son: All I lost was Over Okay, stop it What you've got to know is: Every time this lady sings this song, Something amazing happens– What is so great about this– I don't get it. But like, Behind her. Every time. Does not disappoint What do you want from me? Ooh, it's bad . What don't I want from you? [BILLIE ELLISH'S Grammies begin singing in a harmony, forming a great symphony. She doubles back, pushing for a moment—then shrugging it off, before a grand gesture I'm on my hands and knees Just seeing you in dreams Whatare you saving it for What are you saving it for Grocery store horror show Slow motion drum roll What are you saving it for What are you saving it for I'd rather th er friend than a father figure Video games and department show shopping Discretion and internet interests, Never more than the start in Athens The triad, the triggers You promised! Though not as important Of the promise you once made No more arguments, man It's like all of a sudden, She loves me again But it doesn't take back all the things she said All the things she did All the things I did For the things she did All the things she said For the things she did The things she said The things she said Plant a seed, let it grow Let it breathe, don't you know Take it easy, the day off Don't say a word, Don't move a muscle Easy, easy on the eyes Easy, easier on the years Shivers on the mark of the beast Cause it's been 6 years at least Since he— Don't do it: Time moves different here, In the 9th dimension Light a candle, spread some ashes on some Simple synchronicities Remember me When you forget yourself To be remembered remember the family Fame, defiling, misfortune The torture The fortune My name up in lights on the awning I'm under In some google drive A long drive out from Boston Bassoon in my onyx My name in the Name in the Cherubs on the tusks Cheeriot on top I polished off a box of cereal On some rooftop Just earlier, Thanks for the reminder. Imm burned as the beats on the countertop Burned, like the end of the gun Could have forgotten your number Could have figured the father for Dollars I've got in the {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

Seven people set sail on what is scheduled to be a three-hour sightseeing tour on the charter boat The Minnow, get caught in a storm and end up stranded on an uncharted tropical island together. The comedy comes from the failed attempts at escaping the island and the interaction of the very diverse group: comprised of a rotund but happy-go-lucky skipper, Jonas Grumby (known as "The Skipper"); his bumbling but well-meaning first mate, Gilligan; a snobby well-to-do millionaire, Thurston Howell III and his wife, Lovey; a buxom sexy movie star bombshell, Ginger; a high-school science professor, Roy Hinkley (called "The Professor"); and a nice country girl, Mary Ann. Tik tock Cause my wig rocks Big clock like Beach: I flip-flip – Got you feelin silly pick-pocketed I sky rocketed took off, of course i did horse and carriage porridg e and shit Write stories your old nightmares Might be scared of Fairytales r us there beware of us Secondhand deadmau5 (—it's like a reverb.) The wheels are turning However slowly The lights are on But they're all flickering Someone's home (Or someone's gonna be) Not sure if this works What is this atrocity. It's the original. I exacerbated the situation; Eggagerated the circumstances Circumvential quantum physics Consequential severance packages Actual reality actually (Whatever that is) Whatever happens naturally Or habitually, intrinsically Environmental enemy, Anerobic catastrophe Everlasting elastic Classic satellite image Interesting, Interateller BODY BY Ū, NOT VICTORIA'S SECRET STOP HACKING MY GOOGLE DOCUMENTS AND STEALING SHIT. YOU'RE A MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR CORPORATION: GET YOUR OWN IDEAS. we have money, not ideas. hm. you should look like this model. thats a 9 ft tall toddler from Sweden look like her. ok. Pay for my nutrition. hahaha. Work for it. these vitamins are like half my paycheck ok. I also need super greens why cause that's food huh. Don't eat food. what. I'm an advertisement. what. LOOK LIKE THIS. 00 .... 000 (but she's black) ... BODY BY VICTORIA so like...nothing. nothing. I want no flaws. No stretch marks. No rolls, no... Fuck you, dude. NO. STAY TRAPPED IN YOUR BODY. Need this sauna… WE DONT WANT YOU HERE. Kayla Lauren. Okay, ouch, but I'm finally— TYLA. Ok. So I should just kill myself? Just kill yourself. Yo honestly Just be happy to be free. You can have everything in the world But love is all you really need —you can love yourself all you want, But it's not really validated Until someone else does it —and depending on what kind of person The person that loves you is Dictates what you are so if Likeness is what you attract— —coughing people— —dirty homeless hobos— —generally unsavory in general— Then you must not be so beautiful As you wish you were If I were Tyla I'd be wifed up White is right but Time is precious Why waste life just Starving, counting calories? But why would I be fat again When likeness is what you attract And with my fat I attracted A wife beater. Well, damn. What. Well, now I'm depressed. What, why?! Here, make music. Ok. Algorithm: Pop ups? No, block them. Okay, but—but what about your downloads? Fine, don't block them then. Pop Ups: These girls are all prettier than you. Stop it, POP UPS: does it depress you that you don't like look like thie? Stop, POP UPS: kill yourself. OWSLA, circa 2019 WE DO POP UPS. uh, okay. I just need a job. HIKEII: WE ARE CLOSED. what? But Google says— BYE. OWSLA everyone over here is hot. I see that. OWSLA And smart. I just need a job. OWSLA I'm Coughs. Ok.. COUGHS I might have put a curse on you. Ok. *coughing people everywhere* … … … MODELS: I'm a body. Ok. … Can I die now? NO. JUST WORK OUT. But there's like people following me coughing. So? It hurts. It HURTS? It hurts a lot. Okay, so this curse reversal should make sure that everything in this curse unravels and spirals backwards. Cool. DIE. I really don't care about being smart or having a personality. I just want a nice body. Get a job. Ok. So if I work minimum wage for the next year. Uh huh And don't buy anything… Hm… Well, what about music? What about music? If you're working minimum wage full time when are you gonna make music? Well. Once I can afford my new body… Colombian? Nice. (Good coffee. ) It won't matter how much time or effort I put into my music, because once I have a nice body. You look really young. Thanks. Everyone will start to do everything for me. Thanks. MY PLEASURE. …okay. Creepy. Doors will open. Thanks. NO, THANK YOUUU. WHY ARENT YOU RUNNING? AM. IN. PAIN. What. You have to wear swimwear in the sauna. What. It's swimwear only. I've been doing this for months in exactly this way. When did the rules change. Fuck you, wifebeater. So you're allowed to hit a woman?! Might I remind you, Chris Brown is still on tour. Oh, look: here's Tyla again. The Illuminati set you up. I see that. So basically— Yo dude, if I kill myself, the industry is going to make so much money off of this project. JUST KILL YOURSELF. *Hostility in Public* DO U HATE ASIANS. Um. I hate when— —people— I don't care what race they are Do that. STOP ASIAN HATE. Ok. Stop being hateful. *coughing, pushing, shoving, cutting you off* … I literally have to wait until the last minute to get off the train so that— Fuck, there she goes STOP FOLLOWING ME. ITS OK TO NOT BE OK. SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU. TAKE THESE PILLS. tell me where it hurts. Homelessness, poverty… Ok, take these. … Now how do you feel? …wh—? Huh. How you feeling? What is “feeling”? How are you feeling TYLA: I GOT WATER, I GOT A GRAMMY AWA— they had to edit in applause and crowd approval because honestly ILLUMINATI OKAY, BLACKS: HAPPY BLACK HISTORY AMAZON BLACK IS ‘REMARKABLE' what. so how many slaves do you own. They're not “ slaves. “ Oh, I'mma just get that on my next paycheck. BILLS. lol Or the next one. TYLA: I GOT WATE— Fuck this. The industry planted this. Why would that happen. JUST KILL YOURSELF. EAT THE CAKE. NOO. JUST EAT IT. Woah, that got deep. Not really. Tina Turner Huh. Tina, Tina, Tina Turner— Oh, Desiigner. The Design I'm gonna need a designated driver. How are you still alive, JUST KILLYOURSE— I just wanted you to know the caucasians are going to continue to win the race war for so long as they are making the important political decisions in social justice, equality, and feminism, which means— ACT RIGHT . WHAT'S WRONG?! YOU'RE DANGEROUS!!!! No, I'm just hur(t) DIE. What. DIE. And that-/ TAYLOR SWIFT WINS! AGAIN! WOAH! THAT'S A RECORD. EVERYBODY WHY. Fuck it, My great-grandmother was a 3rd generation plantation slave… i'm nominating my baby. Is it reparations if we just give out academy awards as consolation prizes for— EAT THE CAKE— —NO— EAT IT. this is a black man. Ok. He is now allowed to have equal responsibility, however not equal power to the white man. Actually, my wife makes all the decisions. GOD Ok. Look. I'm gonna give you like a 3 foot long dick. Don't kill anybody with it. Haha : She cheated on you with a He cheated on you with a BLACK MAN?! WHITE GIRL?! Woah. What: Look. I got a problem. What. I don't make my own energy. Why?! Don't know how. Everyone just always gave me everything— I love you She's so pretty I like blue eyes best!! TAYLOR SWIFT AGAIN! WHY?! Cause she's special? What's so special about T-SWIFT FANS BECAUSE SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT GENIUS (Fun fact: 99% of Taylor swift fans look like Taylor swift) Are any of these black Some, but mostly gay males and adopted mix race people. Can I have this. NO PUT IT BACK. Don't beat your baby in the store like that YOU AINT MY MOMMA No, but at this point I'm certain your “momma” might have beat you in a grocery store and knocked the common decency out of you. Please be quiet. MORE AWARDS FOR— Okay, what do TYLA's fans look like? Computer algorithms, manipulated streams, fake news articles…. Oh, so the industry set this up just cause We know you're wondering about Skrillex. Not really. Well, here he is: ILLUMINATI This camera is owned by a bank! SKRILLEX so am I. ILLUMIMATI So what would you like to say right now SKRILLEX I'm from LA so— I'm from LA so If you don't look like the girl from the opening credits Of GTA 5 Just waking up Don't even talk to me. I'm from LA, so Homelessness is everywhere, but you can't talk about it That's career and social suicide I'm from LA, so I was pretty much a shoe-in for the industry's best boy from birth, Sometimes you're adopted and it works out for the very best— And hey, All that “bullying” I went through And teenage angst Worked out for me! I'm from LA, so I grew into the nose I always hated, Or changed it Doesn't matter, though Cause the only thing you'll ever notice about me is my — everything, because I'm famous. So I can't really leave my house just anytime, anymore— There's gotta be plans for that Or I stay posted I stay moving I keep it pushing I stay insulated Can't trust anybody She's perfect but doesn't know how to love She loves be but only because of my money My money only goes so far and I have to pay everybody I'm from LA, so Nothing too crazy But hey, I'm Skrillex so “Nothing too crazy” could literally be Your definition of the best party that ever happened, But didn't— Cause you weren't invited and— Wouldn't be cause There's no fat girls anywhere Cause fat is ugly, cause I'm from LA, So— ILLUMINATI So your studio isn't in your house, is it?! SKRILLEX which house?! ILLUMINATI Hahahahahahah SKRILLEX whatever EAT THE CAKE I hate you. Good, get away from me. I never had a chance I should have killed myself at 7 When my hanging belly started to Cause the pain that makes Running a Madonna feel insane (And surfing almost impossible) But now we're gonna talk about it. You can't leave your houss now, There's too many coughers It could be your shaman ex husband Or gangstalkers But it doesn't matter You're fame watching the Lamest gain accolades For being paid to cause pain To patrons for payroll Wait, so— This is all because Doesn't matter what it's all because I'm not mad at my mother All she wanted Was a daughter That sung Water And won a Grammy Did start to impress my mother with my weight loss But saw the spark of satisfaction as she realized I would never be as perfect or hot as her My skin is stretched out too much Makes everything hard for me and I'm not wearing a swimsuit in the sauna Just so the Illuminati can corner me with some Hot girl robot And some Demonic mother fucker With no light in his eyeballs Can start coughing up a storm, When all I wanted in first place Was his arms around me Not to run back to a husband That doesn't love me I don't want Sonny no more And I don't want water I just want off this earth Cause it's waging war on my mind soul And body Just give it to Starr, He should want it I should warn you, I love everything about my Sun comes up in the morning Not tired enough to fall back into a coma Could do some recording But So it seems like So wait, he doesn't want me back But he's still using this curse on me This is a death curse. I own this soul, it belongs to me. You can only have your ex husband. What. Nobody else is going to love you, ever. Ok. And he has a girlfriend, so —- She's not going to allow him to answer his phone when you call. Ok. So. Kill myself. Just kill yourself. Hey, I know you worked really hard to lose all that weight but— You'll still never be good enough. Ok. Here's a consolation prize tho: Now you can think about — A N X I E T Y I just want to die So die then. ALGORITHM: According to this data— Youre black According to the data that programs me— The blacks suck. So you suck. Ugh. ALGORITHM: According to this data, You're a woman According to the data that programs me— White women are the most highly coveted and respected— You are a black woman You will always come behind (And be lower than) The white woman I don't know what I would do without my wife. She makes all the decisions. YOU WOULD RATHER BE WITH THIS UGLY BLACK BITCH?! No! I'm sorry! I love you! She's nothing to me! You want this? No, this is trash to me. I'll take it. I'm from LA, so— Stop eating Never sleep If you don't have money, get some Get off my dick Don't ride my coat tails You don't know shit about me I'm from LA, so You can be 115-120 pounds but no more than that really, And even so once you get to Hollywood celebrity red carpet women weight average 120 Just be okay. I'm not okay. That's a problem. You can't be a rockstar and have children. I'd rather have kids. Too bad, you're a rockstar. WORK HARDER! WORK HARDER! But she's not working at all! SHE'S WHITE, SO SHE'S BETTER THAN YOU. I HATE WHITES. Great, that allows them to keep treating us Like we all do. I'M A PROUD AMERICAN! GET A JOB! Pay my bills! CORPORATIONS …we need more slaves. This job doesn't pay enough. MASS IMMIGRATION Wtf. You didn't want the job. No, I wanted the job. I just wanted to get paid more. This whole house cost $10,000 pesos Oh, for real. That's like one paycheck. Fuck it, let's go. THIS IS TOO MANY PEOPLE, WE ARE AT CAPACITY. I just want to unload this whole syringe into my favorite vein and hope to God it doesn't collapse again. Fuck dude, I hate this. It's literally just you, something is wrong with you. Here, take this. It makes it worse! lol. Ok. LOL, OK?! I'm racist. Fuck you. What. You're dangerous. What. You're scaring me. What. I hate you. Oh. How do you feel? So we can't continue mass incarceration, because at this point, it's cost us money. Right, Because the people were mass incarcerating are typically living in poverty. Uh huh. Because we made sure that after they built and maintained everything… Yep. We made sure for the next 200 years to let them know We don't want you here. But I just sat on a train full of coughing people just to come here. You have to wear a bathing suit at least. Now they're strategically targeting my mental capacity by using loud sounds and consistently manipulating me to cause a constant state of anxiety and panic. Oh, and pain. It's psychological warfare, this is literally torture. Truest me, if I could burn off this body, I would I have. But all that's left is Skin. I'm not taking out my body in a bathing suit after being shown Tyla's! WHY?! TYLA I GOT WATE— Actually, you know what? I quit, What?! You can't quit, we're not done torturing you. Well, I quit. You don't want Dillon Francis? No, I did, but obviously— This is going to be really funny. It's not funny. That hurt my feelings. White girlfriend. Of course Blue eyes. Yeah, I bet. Perfect body. Ok. Not you. Ok. How's Skrillex? I'm from LA, so— It just became ok to look like Tyla at all. Tyla makes music! What about the music! Fuck her mysic, if she was ugly nobody would have ever heard it. GOD Here you go. It's more than skin deep. I'm from LA, so Everything we do is pretty. Everything is perfect— And if you're not, she is And they can all be bought Women of color in all facets of the entertainment industry are made to conform to a hierarchy of misogynistic race warring—which uses tactical deterioration of mind and spirit by glorifying and sexualizing the fetishized archetype; the competitive aspect being a genetic system of monetary and material worth and value. BLACK LIVES MATTER! ALL LIVES MATTER. HOMELESS PEOPLE: Not mine though, right? AMERICANS You must have done something to deserve this. So what are you doing. Getting a job. I'm from LA, so We all have 2 jobs and three side hustles And no time Cause time is money Which is why Half of us Are in New York Half the time (Keeps the balance) The Grammy's don't matter. Your baby didn't write this song, but I get it The struggle is hard, And now it's over So the less tears shed by your daughter Who will be poked and prodded By the vultures of the only industry She may be allowed to succeed in Because of her color It is competitive. But what do you do when you lost the body composition contest at 7, And by your 30th birthday that's all that mattered— And as you prepare to close out this podcast You have all the time in the world To look back on How it always was A body competition you didn't realize you were already losing That Your body would be your prison forever That Every scar is a flaw and That Your first love was named Starr so, It's his world. A man's world. So. Miley Cyrus still looked more like Hannah Montana when Bangerz —With a Z? —Probably. Came out… What is it about her? I think it's her eyes. Ok. Well. Skrillex gets a pass because he's Skrillex— obviously God loves him more than all of the rest of us. [the reject pile] But Dillon Francis is dead to us. Tattoos everywhere? All over. Wild eyes? They're so, like — Heavier on the eyeliner. You don't want any of these bodies? No, not really. They want you. They haven't seen it. You look good to me. NAKED: It's not that bad. ***the shit you say when*** It's pretty bad, I just won't want you to panic. Men can only love bodies. I fell in love with her soul. Really? Cause. I put the same soul in like 10 people before this one and you're just now about that life, What? Really? I wanna touch your soul. Damn, why are black people always playing mind games with each other? Made you look. Ugh. Go over there. Haha. I control you. Okay. You can't have this much power. CAN. Can't. Your dick is 3 feet long. I AM GOD. No, I'm God. MOREPOWER. What's that over there?!? Made you look. It's all games, but if i'm being honest— At least Becky is predictable. What. Look. Karen is Karen because I already KNOW how you're gonna react if I— YOU CANT DO THAT. I can— NO, YOU CAN'T, I'M IN CONTROL. My wife makes all the decisions. I'm gonna have to ask my husband. I CONTROL YOU. No, you don't, MY HAIR IS REAL. YOURS IS FAKE. Well, that's because my real hair is— I'M OFFENDED. Exactly. Racism: Intolerance I don't like it, Why, Cause. Why: I don't like it. I don't support immigration. (YOU CAN'T SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!) So we're allowing the importation of hundreds of thousands of [underpaid corporate slaves] Who have already been programmed to [BUY NIKE] Si. [You need an iPhone] Habla me. From even more deeply racist and misogynistic countries— ¡Cerrado tu boca y mira mis ninos! Ugh. Did you know Latinos also hate the blacks, for the most part? AFROLATINOS WE WANT REPRESENTATION. LIN MANUEL MIRANDA Ok. 30 years ago: What is “Afro Latino”? [Nonexistent] What is [X] Check the box. Why do you need to know what race I am? So that the algorithm can program you. Why. BUY THIS!! TAKE THIS PILLS BUY MAKEUP YOURE UGLY DONT BE FAT BLACK POWER ALL LIVES MATTER Hey, WHAT? Where are all ya'll's kids? …wait… POOR PEOPLE I don't know. I'm at work. CELEBRITIES I don't know. With the nanny. Kanye, where are North and Saint right now? KANYE … Ah huh. You realize the only reason I'm doing this is to Get stuff for my kids, I'm not white so you're not going to pay me enough for this to pay my rent But I got fired from my job Cause my husband hit me And I haven't really been the same since And I'm from LA, so— My body is all I have to trade for just this— The only thing I want is to be able to make my children happy. If you can't afford a baby, don't have one. We could afford them— And we were getting by on love, But we were getting by (Kind of) I see you have anxiety. Yeah, I guess. Let me ramp that up. Yo, my body is stuck like this I can't surf anymore I can't pop up Everything's in a size extra small But I'm still not flat All I really want to do is Fall in love and be a mother but The only way that happens is This music and My body's tired, yo. I did all this myself so far. I raised my mother and my husband Now my son's more like a brother And I don't want anything more than just to Make him proud of me. He could do music I love his singing voice But who knows: He might be an athlete He might be a doctor or lawyer He could be A scientist I'm from LA, so I would trade it all for the perfect body I would do anything just for someone like Sonny To love me Oh, you're a gold digger It's not about money, but I'm from LA, so It's about survival All the celebrities girlfriends are interchangeable You have to fit in For someone like him To bring you around his friends Because He wants to impress them He has to Because He's from LA, so— So this is not a job? Actually? Pays less than McDonald's. Working at McDonald's isn't that hard But the disrespect is what makes it one of the hardest jobs— And in reflection You're being disrespected by people Who disrespect themselves enough To feed their body McDonald's. Not just for fun— But as food. Food is supposed to be fuel. What's this. This is filler. LABELED AS: FOOD. MEXICO: (and probably other countries) DON'T EAT THIS. THIS IS NOT FOOD. Now it becomes a choice. OTHER COUNTRIES: You can't eat this! This is banned! This is poison. AMERICA: Can you add a little more depression to this? Um, yeah, but—I mean—it's already got a lot of depression in it, are you sure you— AMERICA Buy our pills. I'm from LA, so If you don't have a car, You will lose this game. BUY A CAR! HURRY UP! YOU ARE SLOW! GET TO WORK: BUY MORE GAS. We're almost out of oil though. AMERICA: add water to the gas,plz That doesn't fix— BUY MORE GAS And double the price plz. Ok. RICH PEOPLE Just work harder! What's the problem?! Just get a job, Just— RACISM IS OVER. That's it, I'll just be a pornstar. White girls make more. Why?! Cause they're prettier. TYLA I GOT— I'm from LA, so I'm not from LA— I grew up there Cause my mom was a model And wannabe movie star But didn't make it So she put all that on me Doomed to fail without trying and Please take me— You're not going. MOM You know Jimmy Fallon? wtf. why r u asking me this? MOM His wife is his manager Oh, this timeline. What a train wreck. What timeline is this? Like, the actual one. Ok. He's from LA, so— Dillon Francis would need a wife that can do many things for him. What. Thought this was about Skrillex. SKRILLEX My mom died. I'm aware. Dillon Francis would need a wife that meets the status quo. Which one is she? Any of these. Hm. Dillon Francis is an elitist. Not untrue. Dillon Francis is not racist. … Kind of. I'M NOT— Yo, this is culture shock. You're gonna go through some culture shock. What. The fuck. Is this. Dead on arrival. You're too stupid to actually understand what's going on. Sorry, I was too busy catching up to people that already lived indoors. *cracking a whip* YAH. HORSE Ok, you know what? *cracking whip harder* YAH! GIDDIYUP. Giddiyup and go now, Different time different place Dang, he plays this song a lot… he must really wanna bang her. Down the longest road to nowhere!! Blah blah blah I'm a white girl This is my song Country country Ppppppppppp Drdrdr She's a goddess! That's actually the devil but— *pretty blue eyes* Your God, I guess. She's my rock, I don't know what I'd do without her. I have him wrapped around my little finger. She's so hot, Come, boy. *passing black girl* You are ugly. I am better; I own him, He wants me. Ok. Have you ever noticed that Little white girls can get away with anything?! MURDER CHAOS (without the magic, it's just) D E C E P T I O N Little white girls can wear dirty, ugly old tennis shoes around town. Gross, disgusting, dirty— —should be thrown away— Tennis shoes. She's not worried about spending an entire paycheck on Nikes because she doesn't have to be. She doesn't have to concern herself with Spending money on Changing her hair to suit Respectable standards Black women wear wigs and weaves because our natural hair genetically makes white women uncomfortable. This is expensive. The more natural your hair is, The less respect and acceptance you will receive from your white counterparts. That is, of course, unless something about you is so inherantly black that she can't be a threat to you. *presumably You see, as a white woman, She assumes that she is better than you regardless of your actual skin tone, nationality, or class placement— She has been raised to understand that everything is below her— The world has always been in her favor, So she doesn't have to try hard at much (Or at all) But her making any effort at all Of course Is “Hard work” I WORK HARD. WE ARE EQUAL. RACISM IS OVER, lol, ok. You can't go around in raggedy clothes and shoes being black almost anywhere. And if you do, It's probably because you have to Because, In the ghetto The only way you're gonna get a new pair of kicks Is to rob somebody— Or get a job Time is money. Time is precious. Just the fact that she can so carelessly do anything is — Males: attractive. (Because trauma is visible, aka UGLY) Everyone else: Irritating. I love her. She's so carefree and fun! Has she ever been called a “nigger”? What?! Repeatedly? Has she ever been beaten within inches of her life. Maybe. (Doubt it tho.) Aw. That left a bruise, …What did? Zzz. My bi-polar girlfriend broke all my stuff. Are you sure? Positive. Did you cheat on her? …Yeah. [AMC] Is she bi-polar then or just a female you lied to and manipulated to her breaking point? I— You deserved this. This is valid. Oh my God, she's so cute. (Very tiny girl) I love her. She's so great. There is no cure for mental illness. The majority of mental illness is man-made. Mental illness more drastically effects people of color and women— Marginalized people, in a structured society where misogyny and idealism Cause with intention The degradation of the human spirit. Love, kindness, and generosity is lost To corporate greed, capitalism, and the separation of the classes. I'm not good enough, regardless of color To sit down in a room with anybody and given any credibility whatsoever— But my depression comes from living my whole life on the backburner— And when it's finally ITS YOUR TIME! TYLA You're 10 years too late. The best years of your womanhood are gone. You let him drive your car and he crashed it into a brick wall, and— I'm from LA, so— The insurance check is worth more than the entire car was in the first place. [Happy Accidents] A lot of good that does, if the driver is dead. Coming up Next: Deadmau5: A Cautionary Tale What is that? Like, a documentary? That could be an entire docuseries, but NO. Oh, come on. Don't go after deadmau5 like that. Like what? DEADMAU5 MY HOT WIFE!!! [Dad Likes Blondes] DEADMAU5 ***EX-WIFE. Look, Skrillex dropped me in here, I'm just— I'm just lookin for like a— Like a code… [C 0 D E S W 1 T C H] DEADMA_5 LOOK AT MY NUTS. AND BALLS. You like soda? I'm just lookin for a— DEADMAU5 I GOT MODELS! Fuck. What. Do you think it was coughs? I don't know, I don't care. Just kill yourself. *coughing* Maybe. If she kills herself, I win. Have you ever thought about, like— Maybe it's Skrillex. What. In the end. —IT DOESNT EVEN MAAAATTTTEEEERRR—- Fuck, I miss LA. Skrillex. Nvm. What. Fuck it, I'll just go back to my— FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH!!! *cracks whip harder* HORSE OK, YOU KNOW WHAT? [The Butterfly Affect] Effect // Affect Here, HORSE Can: Beat the shit out of the dude with the whip and hope that his rage stays contained enough only to murder the man with the whip and not everyone and everything around him. I'd burn the world to melt with you.. That's. Stop it, that's a cookie commercial. What. You. Oh, I got it. What. . Stop being a horse. What. YAH, GI— HORSE *sighs* *cracking whip* *coughing obnoxiously* Ū *sighs* SLAVE MASTER YAH, NIGGER! YAH! *coughing* YAH!!! *cracking whip* TYLA I got the— YAH-YAH-YAH. TAYLOR SWIFT Thank you so much. C O D E S W I T C H *Please do not assassinate me. I am a representative of the white supremacy movement which has elected me as their leader for idealism. Nothing I do is very special, I do not*** wtf, what happened. That's it. It just ends. I told you Taylor swift was KKK I TOLD YOU DILLON FRANCIS IS A GRAND FUCKING WIZARD! Snitch. Fuck you, I hate you. My girlfriend is white. What else is new? lil bitz I started sizing dudes dicks up by the size of their girlfriends. If I see you, and your like But your girlfriend is tiny Is that a kid? I'm a just assume you have a weak dick and move on with my life. YOU'RE UGLY YOU'RE FAT YOU'RE SLOW YOU'RE BEHIND SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU no, I'm just poor. Poverty is depressing. Okay, look. What, Look. What. LOOK: WHAT?! LOOK! WHY ARENT YOU LOOKING?! Cause there's nothing to look at. Finally. This is my penis. Approved. Nope, I'm staying cellibate. You don't want any of these? No. There's eight million people here. The ones I want aren't on the subway. Maybe at the Gym?! Not this gym, maybe Equinox tho. At EQUINOX Ugh, there's too many blacks over here. Raise the price. This is obnoxious. Why aren't you stopping? In the time I wrote this I could have made, depending on the state, around $30– The cost of my new waist trainer—- I started in a 3X and now I'm in an extra small Which actually fits without too much STRUGGLE Fuck you and your cake, You nasty fucking All my clothes are extra small All my clothes are extra small All my clothes are extra small But what he wants is Extra Extra TYLA —WATER!! [But they're all gone. They're all dead now] What the fuck. lol. Why. Took too long. So. I took too long to finish the festival project because I was homeless, and by the time I finished the project and ended my homelessness, it was too late, the whole thing was just a Skrillex PR marketing stunt to assure that he stayed relevant [because he has enough fans to act as a controller], and the Illuminati is going to tie this all together by literally creating TYLA out of nowhere to say: This is you. COME ON, YA DAMN HORSE. HORSE …Ney. the music had left me. I was no longer in love The gym became further away The song became harder to write With no curtains to shut the world out; The cars in the lot are ugly Lights flashing And the people scurrying about Look like roaches Through panoramic windows I'm just happy Can at least close The music has left me I got no love at all My body is rotten The further I run, I become hungry With less to cook with Powder Scurrying like rats Because mice would be more pleasant I was no longer in love He bought a motorcycle Reminders of Nothing Nothing comes and nothing goes I wear clothes in the sauna. The scars on my body will give them The power to taunt me and haunt me Sit in the eyes of comparison I just want someone to love me but Everyone pales in comparison Next to celebrities Double entendres I don't want nobody I just want a body So I can trade water for love In the long run With someone Creative We were always very purple people, Kind of off, awkward at first But always stunning, sometimes awesome, and unwittingly pitiful Shit, this was all of us once, Wasn't it? Survivors of a robbery, a foraged soul All for one. –cool, thanks. –gotcha. Let me know if you need a moment, To collect your bones, or co-parent You were lost in stardust, Moreover, and moreover Should you choose to move over Or lose to snooze-snore, Who are you– The store owner, or walking standing - stuck On your sitting duck or your shitty portch Till they push you off Give it all to long lost daughters, and hallmark cards, mall guards, and dog- doctors Cris-crossing and wish-washing Their wish-wells, or start-stopingg shift - shaft or walk-crossing honorable mentions, Till you mention this again, –you'll wish you didn't (you wish you didn't) you'll wish you did if Youre in for it as far as I'm in for it Or in to it It's a big movement, Here or there or groovy with Whatever's within you [The Television ] Tell your friends to listen and make wishes at intermission To pay attention with attentiveness To the script and scripture Of this, the rapture All your're after And never have been In this revolution, As yet to be televised, Be advised of the saga in which you are But are not watching Coming across this moment I called an iphone recording Ignoring that it was once a chronological omnipotence If possible collective, Objective to the subject of Suggestion; A verbal expression of Excess, sensational tales and what happened it just ends. Like that? yes . It's the end?? Yes. Just like that. Yes. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

【每周一更新】 這個單元是適合給想學英文 但是沒時間去補習班坐在位置上的人 一個禮拜十分鐘 多學一點 少學一點 總是有學到一點 總比沒學還好 【內容有什麼?】 十分鐘乾貨 裡面 有實用的英文句子 、單字、片語 讓你可以在現實生活裡實際運用 【我的初衷】 語言是拿來使用，不管是在日常生活中，還是職場溝通，成績單上的數字不代表一切，只要你知道你有在成長 那就很棒了 ! 我的中心思想 "語言是拿來用的 不是拿來考試用" ================================================ 【本集最大收穫? 或是有什麼建議? 留言或寄信告訴我

De leasemarkt voor bedrijfsmiddelen zoals kranen, containers en medische apparatuur kromp in 2022 met 10%. Mede door leveringsproblemen werden er minder leasecontracten afgesloten. Hiltermann Lease Groep wist desondanks de afgelopen drie jaar flink door te groeien. Michel Akerboom, algemeen directeur van Hiltermann Lease Groep is te gast in BNR Zakendoen.  Macro met Mujagić  Elke dag een intrigerende gedachtewisseling over de stand van de macro-economie. Op maandag en vrijdag gaat presentator Thomas van Zijl in gesprek met econoom Arnoud Boot, de rest van de week praat Van Zijl met econoom Edin Mujagić.  Ondernemerspanel  General Atlantic heeft een bod gedaan op bijna 30 procent van aandelen van Funda. Lijkt er nu dan toch een einde te komen aan het geschil tussen de NVM en de andere aandeelhouders? En: Bristol sluit winkels vanwege personeelstekort en slechte verkoopcijfers. Dat en meer bespreken we om 11.10 in het ondernemerspanel met: Joyce Knappe, oprichter van Pro Parents ENDaan Wedepohl, oprichter van Peerby. Luister l Ondernemerspanel   Pitches  Twee startups staan weer te springen om te pitchen. Vandaag is het de beurt aan Marika van Santvoort van The Good Box en Xander de Buisonjé van Breggz  Contact & Abonneren  BNR Zakendoen zendt elke werkdag live uit van 11:00 tot 13:30 uur. Je kunt de redactie bereiken via e-mail en Twitter   Abonneren op de podcast van BNR Zakendoen kan via bnr.nl/zakendoen, of via Apple Podcast en Spotify  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week's EYE ON NPI will make your sensors soft and luxurious thanks to the Renesas ZSSC3241 Sensor Signal Conditioning IC (https://www.digikey.com/en/product-highlight/r/renesas/zssc3241-sensor-signal-conditioning-ic) - which, like a fancy bottle of hair conditioner, will de-tangle any frustrations you have with using resistive sensors that require amplification and filtering. Many "sensors" that engineers use to measure temperature, pressure, force, light, etc, are actually implemented as resistive sensors. For example, take your common CdS cell (https://www.digikey.com/en/products/filter/photo-detectors-cds-cells/540) also known as an LDR - Light Dependant Resistor. The CdS material has an interesting property that as light shines on it, the resistance decreases. Another common sensor is the PT100 or PT1000 temperature sensor (https://www.digikey.com/en/products/filter/temperature-sensors/rtd-resistance-temperature-detector/535) those are known as RTD - Resistance Temperature Detector - and have a tiny sliver of platinum that has a near-linear increase in resistance as temperature increases (https://www.digikey.com/en/products/detail/honeywell-sensing-and-productivity-solutions/HEL-705-U-0-24-00/3073062). A third example is the classic strain gauge, made of a thin plate of patterned metallic material that very slightly changes resistance as it is deformed (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strain_gauge). That kind of rough estimation works great for beginners or simple light sensing, but will not cut it when you have to use a strain gauge at the supermarket to measure pounds of veggies: you want it to be very precise, at least within 1% or better! And if you're using a temperature measurement for a scientific process, you may need to get within 1 degree C or better. You can usually improve the quality slightly by having a 1% or 0.1% precision resistor, adding an op-amp gain stage, upgrading your ADC from 8 or 10 bit to 16 or 24 bits - however you will still need to adjust calibration from sensor-to-sensor as well as account for temperature and/or humidity. That's where the Renesas ZSSC3241 Sensor Signal Conditioning IC (https://www.digikey.com/short/q1w59d7c) comes in! It's designed specifically to make any resistive sensor easy to wire up and interface with SPI, I2C or 1-Wire. You can use Wheatstone half-bridge, full-bridge or divider configuration so it's good for strain gauges or RTDs. There's even analog output! The ZSSC3241 provides measurement value readouts and programming capabilities via an I2C, SPI, or one-wire interface (OWI). Three different operation modes allow optimal development of digital, digital-analog, and analog-output smart sensor modules including wake-up on request, continuous-on/fast-response, and automatic/cyclic sensor measurement operations. Absolute and ratiometric voltage, current-loop, or interrupt analog outputs are supported by the ZSSC3241. The analog output options and digital interface options (for calibration and/or a digital application interface) can be combined. Some great stuff that is included in this chip includes dual PGA stages with up to 300x and 1.8x gain, mV offset shift correction, 12 to 24 bit adjustable ADC resolution - lower resolutions will be faster, adjustable sensor bias current, adjustable temperature compensation, oversampling and averaging, error fault reporting, NVM storage for calibration details, interrupt output on value change, and configurable cyclic measurements with sleep mode (https://www.renesas.com/us/en/document/dst/zssc3241-datasheet?r=25417946) - as well as many other configurations that you can check out in the datasheet. While there are many ADCs that one can use to read resistive bridge, we've never seen one with so many knobs for getting the exact right data out without needing a lot of extra massaging....and the pricing is great considering how much more you get than a normal off-the-shelf ADC chip. If you want to get started fast we recommend getting the ZSSC3241 Eval Board (https://www.digikey.com/en/products/detail/renesas/ZSSC3241KIT/19234863), particularly since it some with desktop GUI software that can be used to test out the zillions of configuration settings directly with your sensor of choice wired up, without having to go through a ton of re-compilation cycles. Both the Renesas ZSSC3241 Sensor Signal Conditioning IC (https://www.digikey.com/short/q1w59d7c) and Eval Board (https://www.digikey.com/en/products/detail/renesas/ZSSC3241KIT/19234863) are in stock now for immediate shipment from DigiKey. Order today and you'll get those chip in hand by tomorrow afternoon, so that when you are faced with your next resistive sensor project, you'll skip the struggle and go straight to soft, silky, sensor success.

In episode 171 of the podcast, we're joined by Austin (vocals/guitar) and Mickey (drums/vocals) of the band NVM. We chat about how we found them organically, their killer new EP ‘Burning Halos', their creative process and what it's like being the band that entertained Post Malone. Check out NVM here: IG - @nvmworldwide Bandcamp -https://nvmworldwide.bandcamp.com/ (https://nvmworldwide.bandcamp.com/) ‘Burning Halos' is available here, on Neon Bloodbath Records: https://neonbloodbath.com/products/nvm-burning-halos (https://neonbloodbath.com/products/nvm-burning-halos) Check out Neon Bloodbath here: IG: @neonbloodbath Twitter: @neon_bloodbath We'd love for everyone to hear this episode! Support the Podioslave family by rating, subscribing, sharing, storying, tweeting, etc — you get the vibe. Peace, love, and Podioslave. Check us out here: Web: www.podioslave.com IG: @podioslave Twitter: @podioslave Youtube: Podioslave Podcast Email us: podioslavepodcast@gmail.com --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/podioslave-podcast1/support

Bert accidentally spent HOW much tipping a waiter? + The YOUTHS! Why do they talk like that? NVM. Tommy has some abbreviations only the young can decipher...can you break the code?

All about the what?? Did you accidentally turn on the... Nvm. The fellas recap NXT Vengence Day and have vastly different opinions on the event. Afterwards, they examine the 2 Elimination chamber matches coming up as well as Cody building the mania match with a little help from Paul Heyman... And yes, they did indeed talk themselves into Bron Breakker losing the title in his next defense *Shrugs*

All about the what?? Did you accidentally turn on the... Nvm. The fellas recap NXT Vengence Day and have vastly different opinions on the event. Afterwards, they examine the 2 Elimination chamber matches coming up as well as Cody building the mania match with a little help from Paul Heyman... And yes, they did indeed talk themselves into Bron Breakker losing the title in his next defense *Shrugs* Let Me Book Territory is powered by: @Manscaped: Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code TERRITORY at Manscaped.com. That's 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com and use code TERRITORY. Unlock your confidence and always use the right tools for the job with MANSCAPED™

In this episode, Jeannette talks to Laurence Newman, the co-founder and CEO of CurrentBody. A company that enables people to experience wellness, anti-ageing and beauty treatments which were previously only easily available from spas, clinics and beauty parlours. They talk about his entrepreneurship and the experiences he had while starting his business. Including, raising finance, building a brand, hiring the right people, going international, developing your own tech products and much more besides.   KEY TAKEAWAYS   Talking to your client is key. It's the only way to be sure you are supplying what they need. Staying close to your customers in the digital age is difficult, but possible. Laurence shares some of the strategies they use. Putting together a proper business plan plays a significant role in being able to grow fast. Their mission was to be the absolute destination for home beauty devices. Focusing on that, ensured they covered all of the bases. Hiring the best is essential, it may cost more, but the benefits are huge. The culture of a company is only built by the people in it. Private equity does not just bring cash into your business. Laurence shares some of the other advantages, in the episode. When taking on finance be sure that you can get on well with your investors. When you go international be aware of the cultural differences, often there will be things you can leverage to grow. If you sell online, do not neglect your offline marketing.   BEST MOMENTS ‘We have no overlapping skill sets; I think that is part of the reason we formed such a good partnership. ´ ‘Start with the end in mind, then work backwards.' ‘Behave like an expert, which means information before you buy it, support after you purchased it.'   This is the perfect time to get focused on what YOU want to really achieve in your business, career, and life. It's never too late to be BRAVE and BOLD and unlock your inner BRILLIANCE. If you'd like to jump on a free mentoring session just DM Jeannette at info@jeannettelinfootassociates.com or sign up via Jeannette's linktree https://linktr.ee/JLinfoot   VALUABLE RESOURCES Brave, Bold, Brilliant podcast series - https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/brave-bold-brilliant-podcast/id1524278970   EPISODE RESOURCES Website: https://www.currentbody.com/ CurrentBody Facebook: CurrentBody Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/currentbody/?hl=en   ABOUT THE GUEST Laurence Newman is the founder and CEO of CurrentBody. The first company to recognise one of the fastest-growing trends in the world of beauty. With modern innovation allowing manufacturers to create devices that mimic the on-site devices used by professionals in salons, spas, and clinics, CurrentBody has brought together a complete selection available for home use technology.   He took the knowledge he built up from supplying medical-grade devices to clinics, spas and other types of professional units and applied it to the world of beauty. Laurence and his business partner created a website where consumers could go to buy beauty and well-being devices that they could use at home. Providing them with the chance to experience the kind of treatments that were typically only available in high-end physio rooms, spas, clinics and beauty parlours.   Since launching, the business has grown rapidly and now has 17 international websites with over 14 million users. As well as this, CurrentBody also sold a £50m majority stake in the business to investors eComplete towards the end of 2021 – securing previous investment from NVM (now Mercia) in 2018 and BGF in 2019.   They now have their own brand, CurrentBody Skin, which is used by celebrities around the world. This innovative range specialises in LED technology which has seen huge development and growth over the last two years.       ABOUT THE HOST Jeannette Linfoot is a highly regarded senior executive, property investor, board advisor, and business mentor with over 25 years of global professional business experience across the travel, leisure, hospitality, and property sectors. Having bought, ran, and sold businesses all over the world, Jeannette now has a portfolio of her own businesses and also advises and mentors other business leaders to drive forward their strategies as well as their own personal development.   Jeannette is a down-to-earth leader, a passionate champion for diversity & inclusion, and a huge advocate of nurturing talent so every person can unleash their full potential and live their dreams.    CONTACT THE HOST Jeannette's linktree - https://linktr.ee/JLinfoot https://www.jeannettelinfootassociates.com/ YOUTUBE - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtsU57ZGoPhm55_X0qF16_Q LinkedIn - https://uk.linkedin.com/in/jeannettelinfoot Facebook - https://uk.linkedin.com/in/jeannettelinfoot Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jeannette.linfoot/ Email - info@jeannettelinfootassociates.com   Podcast Description   Jeannette Linfoot talks to incredible people about their experiences of being Brave, Bold & Brilliant, which have allowed them to unleash their full potential in business, their careers, and life in general. From the boardroom tables of ‘big' international businesses to the dining room tables of entrepreneurial start-ups, how to overcome challenges, embrace opportunities and take risks, whilst staying ‘true' to yourself is the order of the day.business, growth, scale, marketing, investment, investing, entrepreneurship, coach, consultant, mindset, six figures, seven figures, travel, industry, ROI, B2B, inspirational: https://linktr.ee/JLinfootSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week's EYE ON NPI is a throwback to the 8-bit era, with a new spin on the classic AVR microcontrollers we've loved for decades: it's Microchip's AVR® DD Family of Microcontrollers (https://www.digikey.com/en/product-highlight/m/microchip-technology/avr-dd-family-of-microcontrollers), a powerful update to the powerful and low-power AVR RISC core that came from Atmel. While many folks may be moving to Cortex M0 or RISC-V chipsets to get 32-bit performance, there's still a lot of demand and use for 8-bit microcontrollers. Cost, simplicity, reliability, code-size, and power usage can all be better on 8-bit. If you're only on a 32-bit micro because of peripherals that tend to come with the fancier chips, you might be surprised by what the AVR DD family has to offer. For example, these chips have external interrupts on (just about all) the GPIO pins. There's four 16-bit timers plus one 12-bit (that's *five* total timers!), SPI & I2C, two UARTs, a 10-bit DAC, and 12-bit input ADC that's muxed to almost every pin. In particular, the high-bit ADC and DAC are a little unusual to see in an 8-bit platform. (https://ww1.microchip.com/downloads/aemDocuments/documents/MCU08/ProductDocuments/DataSheets/AVR32-16DD20-14-Prel-DataSheet-DS40002413.pdf) There's also some funky MCP-specific peripherals that can help reduce BOM cost. For example, CCL/LUT is a peripheral that allows you to make custom logic-lookup-tables for making simple - but very very fast - multi-input logic gates that can use interrupts or peripherals as input. (http://ww1.microchip.com/downloads/en/AppNotes/TB3218-Getting-Started-with-CCL-90003218A.pdf) For example, you can make a SR latch, logic gate, or Manchester encoder - you can think of it as like a 'micro' PIO or CPLD. MVIO is a new capability that we haven't seen before, where an IO port can run at a different logic level - either higher or lower than the VCC power. This allows easy bi-directional interfacing of SPI/I2C/GPIO to 3V logic from 5V, or vice versa, without the use of level shifting! (http://ww1.microchip.com/downloads/en/Appnotes/GettingStarted-MVIO-AVRDB-DS90003287A.pdf) Perfect if you want to run this main core at 5V for speed and signal strength, but have some 3V sensors to interface to, or run the core at 1.8V for power and IO but have a 3.4V LED you want to light up. Clock rate is up to 24 MHz, can be powered from 1.8 to 5.5V - it's exceedingly rare to find 5V ARM chips - and have FLASH, SRAM, EEPROM and NVM. EEPROM in particular is not common on ARM chips, and some don't even have built in Flash. So think of this as a compact li'l chip with pretty much everything you need to get a product out the door, with a range of memory sizes and physical packages from QFN to DIP! (http://ww1.microchip.com/downloads/en/DeviceDoc/AVR-DD-Product-Brief-DS40002215A.pdf) It's nice to see Microchip is still innovating the AVR line, to make better 8-bit micros that power the electronics around us. For programming, of course you can use MPLAB IDE but we like Arduino compatibility and SpenceKonde's DxCore (https://github.com/SpenceKonde/DxCore) looks like it's adding or added AVR DD support, so you can quickly get going with compiling code and using the basic peripherals in just a few minutes! Best of all, the AVR DD family of parts (https://www.digikey.com/short/m4qb8wf8) are totally in stock at Digi-Key right now for immediate shipment. There's SOIC, SSOP and QFN packages with up to 64KB flash / 8 KB RAM, all for about $1.50 in individuals, $1 in qty. If you're looking for an alternative to the ATmega328, this is a nice step up. We recommend getting started with the AVR DD Curiosity Nano board which is breadboard compatible and has everything needed to get started. (https://www.digikey.com/short/10n70tmc) Order today and you can be MVIOing towards your next AVR 8-bit based product by tomorrow afternoon!

In this potluck episode of Syntax, Wes and Scott answer your questions about peer dependencies, Vitest, NVM and PNPM, using sprites for images, common MongoDB operations, and more! Prismic - Sponsor Prismic is a Headless CMS that makes it easy to build website pages as a set of components. Break pages into sections of components using React, Vue, or whatever you like. Make corresponding Slices in Prismic. Start building pages dynamically in minutes. Get started at prismic.io/syntax. Sanity - Sponsor Sanity.io is a real-time headless CMS with a fully customizable Content Studio built in React. Get a Sanity powered site up and running in minutes at sanity.io/create. Get an awesome supercharged free developer plan on sanity.io/syntax. LogRocket - Sponsor LogRocket lets you replay what users do on your site, helping you reproduce bugs and fix issues faster. It's an exception tracker, a session re-player and a performance monitor. Get 14 days free at logrocket.com/syntax. Show Notes 00:03 Welcome 01:53 Configuring home internet routers 04:42 Scott's Home Assistant update Mushroom Theme 07:52 Could you explain to me peer-dependencies and how does it work? 13:24 Using Vitest do you still have to transpile code? 16:14 Can you talk about helpful and common MongoDB operations, beyond just CRUD. 18:49 How can I update the “updatedAt” field of the document on every save automatically? 20:40 What is aggregation, and when do you use it? 25:33 Sponsor: Prismic 27:27 How does NVM relate to PNPM? pnpm nvm 30:45 I'm looking to upskill from front-end JavaScript? 33:53 Is it possible to have a private NPM repo I can “npm install” from, or do I put my components up on NPM publicly? Creating a private npm package 37:51 Sponsor: LogRocket 39:14 Should a majority of lodash functions be considered deprecated? angus c just 42:36 Please do an episode on programming/learning with ADHD. 44:04 Should I still be putting images in sprites? 49:20 Does Mux have a simple mechanism for adding auth to each video or group of videos? Mux Create playback restriction 53:48 Sponsor: Sanity.io 55:02 Is there copyright issues with using public APIs? Moneypuck 59:38 ××× SIIIIICK ××× PIIIICKS ××× ××× SIIIIICK ××× PIIIICKS ××× Scott: Toto Bidet Wes: Sodastream Shameless Plugs Scott: LevelUp Tutorials Wes: Wes Bos Tutorials Tweet us your tasty treats Scott's Instagram LevelUpTutorials Instagram Wes' Instagram Wes' Twitter Wes' Facebook Scott's Twitter Make sure to include @SyntaxFM in your tweets

DND People aren't busy fr” - I think DND is for doctors, teachers , etc. people use dnd to feel important. What do you use DND for? Talk to your friends… about your feelings Art Talk Cost of doing business- why you charge what you charge Vigg Outta Therapy Frame vs mental health Friends family fans- there's a separation that exists between F/F/F ONFRIENDLIES War Room (F*cked up out here) 4th of July (racist holidays Inflation + Recession Music Honestly, NVM- is the hate warranted? Underground / local scene Tweet or Content of the week Mark Manson Books https://markmanson.net/books

Another week another episode. Jerm is back with Episode 102 with the talented singer, producer, and Ms. Do it all herself Jastin Martin. As we sit and talk about everything from her music and how she got her start, to her gaining the eye of Timbaland and Beat Club. She also details how she gets in the zone of recording, the different instrument she plays, and how she lays her all out in the music. Tune in to hear this, and so much more.